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unholyhelbig · 5 months

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the oversight part 5? i love that series!

Title: The Oversight [Part 5/7]

Ship: Female!Reader x Natasha Romanoff

Wordcount: 7589

Warnings: Blood, guns, general violence, empty threats, angst, and horrible grammar.

[A/n: Listen, I straight up just finished watching 'The Iron Claw' and if you value your ability to hold it together, I suggest not seeing it. But also... go see it because it's phenomenal. Oh, and Happy Holidays!, like with most things, I regret my direction on this.]

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Softly, you denied the small wooden bowl that was passed person to person, filled with numbers scribbled haplessly on strips of paper. There was a pit of guilt in your stomach for not bringing a white elephant gift- but as the honorary plus one of Darcy Lewis you succumbed to your fate. She’d drawn a middle grade number and sidled up next to you with her third vodka tonic.

You took a swallow of your own cranberry flavored drink, something that masked the sharp taste of alcohol. You were feeling fuzzy, but in the light way that would assure you’d get through the rest of party and the competitive game of gift swapping.

“Thanks for doing this,” Darcy said to you, nudging your shoulder “it was a little too fancy for my liking.”

She had stressed that she needed your presence to get through all the small talk about science. Darcy was an expert engineer but she could only go so far when it came to awkward co-workers murmuring amongst the twinkling Christmas lights and pre-paid meals. She got along well with most, but you could sense her anxiety well.

“Of course, you know I’d never turn down smoked salmon.”

Truthfully, it sounded a lot better than what your own work was planning. It took some quiet background checks and calling babysitting references, but you eventually conceded to a teenage girl that was certified in CPR and didn’t charge interest.

Your own holiday celebration at the Diner had been lackluster and consisted of much more alcohol. This was quiet and subdued, and a welcome break from the usual chaos that surrounded your life. You were more than happy to watch people tear paper from candles and blankets and ornaments.

“How much money do you want to put on Jimmy bringing some sort of magic kit?”

You hadn’t noticed the girl that hugged the side of the bar, waving down the bartender wordlessly. She was drinking something sweet and garnished with orange. She had a beautiful smile and the clearest eyes you had ever seen. Darcy smiled at her with familiarity and it eased you.

“I don’t bet on things I’m going to lose.” Darcy said with finality. “Y/n, this is Monica Rambeau.”

“It’s nice to meet you,”

Her grip was firm, and you squeezed her hand back with the same amount of pressure. Her smile widened at that before the bartender returned with a fresh drink garnished with another twirled orange peel. The two of you separated.

“So, Monica, what do you do?”

Something in science, the answer was obvious if she was at this holiday party. But she humored you all the same, turning her back to the counter and leaning close to you. There was pride in her answer, and it bloomed in her chest.

“I’m a mechanical engineer, specializing in astrophysics and astrobiology.”

“Don’t’ sell yourself short.” Darcy interjected with a watery laugh “She’s the head of our S.W.O.R.D division.”

Darcy had spoken about this before and the name rang familiar. Her company was looking at alternative fuel sources that could supply space exploration. All the while, they focused on vertical growing and bettering the community. From what you understood, this was a big deal. She was a big deal.

“Wow, that’s very impressive Ms. Rambeau”

Your voice was filled with genuine awe, but your conversation was cut short when the number sixteen was called out. Monica sheepishly pulled herself away from the bar and held her strip of paper up before approaching the table filled with wrapped gifts. She went for a medium-sized one adorned in reindeer.

“Oh wow!” She forced a smile, voice sweet like honey “A magic kit!”

The air in your room was stale and fought you as you pulled it into your lungs. You’d, at some point, kicked off your comforter and were splayed out on your sheets in nothing but a pair of boxer shorts and an oversized shirt. Sweat hat soaked through both and the fabric clung to your skin.

On a blind instinct you grabbed at the gun under your nightstand, fastened by nothing more than duct tape. You could feel your heart in your throat and struggled to swallow it down again. You weren’t sure when this became second nature for you, something within the last two months of accompanying Natasha to the gun range for hours a time.

All the same, you held the tip of the weapon to the ground and rounded the corner of your bedroom into the dark hallway. You were unsettled from the dream you’d just had. The memory. Your subconscious had finally connected the woman who stood at Carol’s side. Her familiarity.

Monica Rambeau.

It was true, there was a stark coldness to her when you’d met at a Christmas party just the year before. It was only in passing and there were moments, like at the fair, when Darcy would mention her co-worker.

This changed things. Anxiety spiked haplessly, even as you diligently searched and cleared each room the way you had been taught. Keep your gun down, keep your eyes on the darkest corners of the room, ready to fire your weapon at any point. Especially if it was aimed at Natasha.

There was the slight movement of a shadow to your left and you quickly raised the gun, aiming it directly at the disturbance. Veronica stood on a chair in the kitchen, struggling to fill a glass with warm water, the only temperature that the faucet would allow.

You let out a quiet, mortified sigh before tucking the weapon into the waistband of your shorts. Your daughter blinked with wide eyes and that same guilty feeling flooded you at once, overtaking the anxiety.

“Baby,” You breathed, closing the distance between you and flicking on the overhead lights. You both flinched at their harshness but eventually blinked the shock away. “What are you doing up?”

You didn’t expect an answer, nor did you get one. Instead, you scooped her up under her arms and set her gently on the linoleum. There was water in the fridge, but she always had issues pouring it from the large jug. Ronnie was stubborn and shot you a frown at your intrusion.

“Don’t give me that look, kid.”

Her expression eased and you dumped the water down the drain before refilling the glass with something colder and more refreshing. Ronnie gulped it down eagerly, soaking the collar of her shirt with the liquid. She let out an appeased noise and wiped the rest of the water away from her mouth. She stood on her tip-toes and placed the glass in the sink.

“Couldn’t sleep, huh? Me either.”

You tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. She blinked tiredly at you, your heart melting at the sight. It was easy to remember the words Natasha had trusted you with on the Ferris Wheel. Veronica would talk when she wanted to, but you had become quite good at reading her expressions and movements. Within the last month, you had stopped the long drives and the specialists. It eased you both.

“How about a sleepover?”

The exhaustion turned into joy and then combined within her look. You couldn’t help but chuckle as you scooped her up. She was getting too big for this, but you didn’t much care. You’d gotten stronger in the last few months and even if you hadn’t, you’d do the same.

With a show of dramatics you tossed her onto the bed and replaced the duvet that you’d flung off. Carefully, as Ronnie’s stare averted, you placed the gun in the drawer next to your bed. The last thing you did was prop the window open, letting out the flat air and letting in the sound of the city.

Ronnie was pulled flush against your chest in a matter of moments, though you had suddenly lost all exhaustion. You listened to the sirens, to the calls of people just ending their nights. If you listened hard enough, you could hear the horns of the boats that settled into the harbor.

“I love you so much.” You whispered into the small of her neck, “One day I’m going to get us out of here.”

Veronica didn’t respond, but the squeeze her little hand gave yours was all the reassurance that you needed.

Clint swallowed down steaming black coffee without blowing on it to cool it down. The nutty scent filled the cab of the car and warmed your nerves. He drank like your daughter did, but with the purpose of waking himself up before the sun. You never did get back to sleep and were wired enough to refuse the cup he offered you this morning.

He’d knocked on your door as the orange sun moved over the horizon. You were to accompany him to the docks to check on business. This somehow seemed less intimidating than the dinner you’d attended with Natasha.

“It’ll be easy. We have a chokehold on the harbor, we just have to check with a few of the vendors to collect their dock rent and call it a day. Everything else is done under the table. People aren’t too happy because at the end of the day, we’re the ones that take money from them. But it’s a necessary evil.”

You nodded and watched as the city went by. It was peaceful, quiet. There had been a single foster home that you stayed in that had a view of the entire skyline. You were too far away to see the bustling people and the everyday chaos that accompanied it.

There were, of course, moments of calm when you would work the early morning shift at the diner. But that would always shatter by the time you made the two minute walk from your apartment to the back door that was choked with the scent of garbage and cheap cigarettes.

“We have some invitations to hand out too. In the glovebox.”

You furrowed your brow and popped it open. His weapon (or his second, or third) sat upon a stack of manilla cards with elegant writing on them that had to be done by hand. You inspected them but didn’t’ dare separate the paper.

“What are these for?”

“Nat throws a party for her benefactors every single year. It’s real fancy, a suit and tie thing. Her renters are invited too and if they have the balls to show up, they always have a good time. She makes sure of it.”

“We’re expected to attend?”

He nodded, “It’s a requirement, really. As Natasha’s right hand. You go where she goes and once your probationary period is over, you’ll be on her like glue. Though, I don’t think that’ll be much of a problem.”

You frowned at his statement, his insinuation. Sure, you had gotten close to Natasha, had even grown to like her. She had a way of getting under your skin until it felt like she lived in it. Otherwise, you would have cut your losses long ago and let her slit your throat the first moment she met you.

There was a feeling of devotion that you felt the need to uphold. She had spared your life, after all. You’d spent the last two and a half months with her guiding you, teaching you how to obey her every word. Without fault, you would. Clint knew it, Kate and Yelena knew it. You knew it.

Instead of admitting it, you frowned and slumped further in your seat, struggling to ignore Clint’s own shit-eating expression. By the time he pulled to a stop, it had started to drizzle enough for him to flick his wipers on. The sound of them scraping against the window filled the silence.

You took careful attention to stay quiet and observe. Your gun was strapped carefully to your side and the invitations rested in your side pocket. You didn’t dare get them wet and let the ink run in a soupy mess. It had been years since you’d been out here and part of you was unsteady on the aged and slick wood.

“Sam is a cool guy. His family has hold on a good portion of the harbor. He likes to joke, so don’t pay him any mind.” Clint jabbed you with his elbow. “And loosen up a little bit, would you?”

You glowered at him and rubbed the stiff spot on your ribs but felt your shoulders lower a bit. There was a lot of weight behind this, that had been made clear to you the second you were inducted into this system.

Instead of heading directly down the long stretches of worn dock, Clint took a turn just before the asphalt ended. A small structure that looked less weathered than the rest of your surroundings rested at the lots end. The windows were thick enough to withstand the watery winds.

Clint stilled his large hand shooting out across your chest. It took you a few seconds to clock the shattered glass on the front door. Small smears of crimson pocked the shards that remained. Much like the evening before, you drew your gun on instinct, and Clint did the same.

He didn’t take care to hide your presence. Instead, he took the brunt of his large boot and cracked through the doorframe with the force of one kick. Wood splintered, raining down on linoleum and a desk that was easily from the 70’s.

You could smell the blood before you saw it, nearly sliding on the flooring. You caught yourself before that happened, heart pounding in your ears. “Fuck!”

“Jesus Christ,” Clint mirrored your sentiments.

Whoever had been here was long gone, but they’d left quite the mess. They’d torn through the filing cabinets, leaving legal papers and folders scattered against the desk and the expanse of cabin space.

You tracked the source of the pooling blood with little difficulty. A man- one that you had rightly never seen before- was laying on his back, facing the ceiling. From edge to edge of his throat was a long cut leaking an ugly red color. His stare was frosty, soaked into his sweatshirt.

It was like a car crash, something that you struggled to avert your eyes from until Clint physically grasped your chin and turned your attention to him. “Hey, you alright?”

“Yeah, yes. Good.” You answered cooly, swallowing whatever dryness was in your throat. “Who would do something like this?”

“Carol… one of her lackeys. This is an eye for an eye thing.”

Even if it was an act of revenge, this was extensive. It sent a clear message even if you didn’t’ exactly know all the specifics of the feud. Of course, you’d seen Yelena at work and even that was mild compared to the brutality of this.

The thought of Monica, if it even had been her, completing a task as unfeeling as this filled your veins with ice. You felt your nails dig into your palms, soft and stinging. There was a surge of anger, and sadness that mixed into resolution. Natasha was right to despise the Danver’s family. Any family that treated the world with this much cruelty.

Natasha was in the gym on the second floor. Large windows overlooked the backyard, and a prolonged view of the harbor. There were blue mats adorning the floor, and a few wracks meant for weightlifting.

You had never seen this part of the house before. Usually the weather permitted sparring outside, but the late summer rain had made that impossible. Sheets of water obscured your usual view, though, it wasn’t exactly trained on the windows.

Natasha had her back facing you, her breathing timed evenly with each punch she threw at an 80-pound bag filled with sand. She wore tight-fitting shorts and a sports bra that left little to the imagination. Not that you had imagined her in that situation before.

Her muscles tightened and relaxed with each movement. They were scarred in a deep orchid pink, long ago healed. At one point, she was lashed. You recognized the damage done by a leather belt and shivered at the memory of it.

Natasha was fit, she was coated in a layer of sweat that dripped across her strength. You had to be clear minded for this and the state of her wasn’t making it easy on you. Her knuckles were wrapped, and she would grunt with each thrust of her fist. For just a moment, you wished you were under her mercy instead of the punching bag.

That broke when she panted against the bag, stopping its swinging with a firm grasp on either side. “Are you just going to stand there and watch?”

Natasha had focused her green eyes on you through the reflection of the window. Of course, you hadn’t intended to gawk as long as you had. But you were leaning against the doorframe of the gym, practically drooling. You had forgotten yourself and you wouldn’t’ put it past Natasha to notice.

She turned to you, a wolfish smile on her face. “Take your jacket off. Holster too.”

You struggled to ignore the haughty expression on her face when you did exactly what she said without question, almost too eagerly, depositing them on the edge of the mat. You pushed your shoes off too, knowing not to track mud on any of Natasha’s carpets.

Her eyebrow lifted at the action. She’d moved closer during your actions, and you’d nearly run into her before noticing. Her presence was intoxicating. All-consuming.

“You’re here to tell me something,” She proclaimed “you’ve got that adorable look on your face. It’s good to know someone in this house still fears me.”

She was joking and it tugged at your heart to send that mood down to the ground before lighting it on fire. You’d expected her to be in poorer spirits after Clint had called her and let her know what had happened at the harbor. Instead, she responded in her same calculated coolness that she regarded you with now.

There was nothing about her demeanor that eased you, and suddenly, it felt like you were being scolded for a decision you had made. Even more so when she grasped your chin and forced you to look at her.

“That woman with Carol from the other night. I know her. Briefly.”

“Briefly?”

“As in, I met her at a Christmas party a few years back and… left with her.”

Natasha’s grip tightened against your chin, her thumb digging into your jaw. There was too much alcohol flowing that night and after making stinted conversation about how to disconnect two metal rings smoothly, the two of you went back to her apartment.

Before the sun came up, you left. There was shame in it, and the walk back to your own apartment punctuated with Darcy’s scolding was enough to make you forget the encounter altogether. It was one night- a fun night, but singular all the same.

Natasha let out a small noise of disapproval that sunk straight to your core. “Is that so?”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Does she remember you?”

“It… didn’t seem like it.”

Her eyes narrowed, nose a short distance from your own. You could feel the hotness of her breath against your throat. How you had disappointed her. That much was clear from the lack of tenderness in her grasp. She eventually released you, trailing her fingers down the expanse of your neck.

She played with the small charm of your necklace, nothing more than a dainty gold chain with the tiniest whisper of a diamond in the center. Your skin prickled at the sensation, breath audibly catching as she worked her fingers over the length of chain.

“Well, I suppose this could be a problem. Especially with Carols violent behavior lately.”

Natasha sighed dramatically, and within an instant her nimble hand had tightened around your throat. She walked you the three steps backwards to the nearest wall. The small of your back landed with a heady thud and you used the last of your available breath to grunt out in protest.

Of course, you had seen her angry before, but it was never directed at you. Not like this. She wasn’t squeezing tight enough to injure you, not really. But the shock of the movement had made you think she would end you all the same.

“You should have come to me right away, pet.” Her grasp tightened; words growled. “And here I thought you were such a good, obedient, girl.”

Her words filled you with an immense shame for letting her down. Over the past few months, it had become impossible to be anything but perfect for Natasha Romanoff. The fact that you hadn’t connected the dots sooner was disillusioning.

The grip against your throat loosened ever so slightly as she leaned closer, her lips nearly ghosting your own. You could barely taste her, a strangled whimper escaping you. She pressed her body close. It was warm and overwhelming.

“I expect you to handle this on your own if it becomes a problem, darling.”

Before you could close the distance, Natasha pulled away from you entirely. It left you panting against the wall, wanting for something more. She knew exactly what she was doing. You craved her more than anything, and she had brought you so close to something you both wanted before denying it altogether.

Natasha sauntered, actually sauntered, across the gym and grabbed a towel from a nearby bench. She regarded you with flushed cheeks, her eyebrow raised as if nothing had just happened and you supposed that nothing did.

“Clint has told you about the party?” It took a few seconds before you found your voice, after her gentle urgings “Use your words, sweetheart.”

“Yes ma’am. He did.”

She reached for a water bottle, exchanging it’s spot on the bench for the towel. She takes three hungry swallows, and you watched the way her throat moved in response to the water. Each of her movements seemed deliberate, nearly calculated to get a reaction out of you.

“Perfect. Don’t worry that pretty little head of yours about what to wear. I’ll lay a dress out in your room.”

“My room?” Your words were squeaked.

There was a short hum in response as she gulped down another helping of water before setting it down entirely. That anger had ebbed away from her almost entirely. The fire that had been within her eyes excited you, and despite yourself, so did her demands.

“You’re so skittish. Come here. We need to work on your lead hook.”

Natasha didn’t offer to wrap your knuckles, nor did you ask. Instead, you leaned into the bag, letting the course material cut into your knuckles with a welcoming sting.

There was great thought put into any Romanoff party that was thrown. Lights were wrapped around the banister, and caterers walked through the teems of people with unwavering silver trays of finger food that cost more than your old salary for a number of months.

Back storm doors were opened to the pool, lit up and buzzing with an equal amount of people. Natasha had hired a piano player who haplessly pressed down on keys and drew a small crowd with each song that would crescendo into the dining room.

The overlapping theme was a dark forest green that reminded you much of the paint color slathered on Natasha’s bedroom walls. Something you hadn’t seen in months, but remembered so fondly. It was clear that she wanted to present a united force, something strong and unwavering in their power.

Clint was dawned with a finely pressed suit and a deep green tie that matched the shade of Kate’s dress to the very hue. She wore something silk and modest, reaching down to her heeled feet but leaving her muscular arms entirely bare.

Yelena stunned in a dress of her own, a crushed sage velvet that had a dipping neckline and sleeves that met at her wrist. By the confidence of her stride, you had no trouble believing she had chosen the outfit with the thought of how many weapons she could conceal. Her devilish smile only confirmed your thoughts.

As of you, Natasha had picked out something a little more revealing. Much like the maroon number she wore to dinner the other night, the dress she chose for you hugged every inch of your body. Its fern color complimented your complexion, bringing out the redness of your cheeks.

A slit moved from the base of your dress to the middle of your thigh. A halter neckline clung to your breasts, nearly pushing them up and out. It had been years, high school prom, since you’d worn something even close to this. You felt your shoulders flush red when you descended the stairs and struggled to blend in.

Natasha was sidled up by the mantel in deep conversation with someone who was a stranger to you. Most of the people here were. Though, their hands gave way to their high-ranking positions in the city. Few had callouses or oil stains.

She was in a three-piece suit that was color matched to your own outfit down to the shade. There were gold accents on her jewelry and the neckline of her waistcoat dipped down the tanned expanse of her skin.

Kate let out a low whistle in response to your entrance as she offered you a hand at the base of the stairs. You’d almost missed the last one due to your shameless gawking at the woman of the party. “Quite the looker, y/n. Natasha chose this?”

“Naturally,”

She chuckled softly, a small sound “Nothing if not calculating. Do you know how to socialize at one of these things?”

“Mm, as the caterer, yes.”

This seemed to amuse her more than you’d like. Katherine Elizabeth Bishop was a name that you had reluctantly googled early on in your employment. She had grown up wealthy and well acquainted with gatherings such as these. Of course, that was before her mother wound up incarcerated for white-collar crimes. The skills seemed to benefit her here, however.

Kate did everything with practiced fluidity that you envied. She plucked two champagne glasses from a nearby tray. “Only one of these, nurse it like your life depends on it. That way they won’t keep trying to shove alcohol into your hands. This is work, after all.”

You followed her lead and took a small sip of the bubbling, sour liquid. It was more expensive than anything you had ever had before and far-from-palatable. It wouldn’t be had to keep the drinking at bay.

“The man that Yelena is schmoozing over there is Billy Russo. Jigsaw. He’s in charge of the lower quarter. The Romanoff’s and the Russo’s have a cordial relationship and Yelena is much more feared than him.”

“Why do they call him jigsaw?” You whispered.

“He tends to chop people into pieces until they’re impossible to put back together. And that’s if you find all the missing parts. He has a very nice summer home up in the Poconos, so don’t get on his bad side.”

Suddenly the drink in your hand didn’t look too bad, but you held it right where it was. Clint was laughing by the window, obviously pushing his charm on a woman that you had never clocked before. She was running her fingers up his tie, tightening it before letting her hands drop.

“Barton is with Ophelia Sarkissian, the Viper. She is known for her cunning leadership. She’s got a huge organization in Hell’s Kitchen. Something called Hydra. I wouldn’t worry too much about it though because Natasha is keeping a tight eye on it.”

“Mm, cut one head off, two more grow back.”

“What?”

“Greek mythology. Hydra is a big water snake that has nine heads. Each time one was cut off two more would grow back in its place. It was practically unkillable until Hercules came through the marshes with his nephew. Hercules would slice each head off while Iolaus cauterized the wounds so the heads couldn’t grow back.”

Kate blinked at you with shock in her eyes. You simply gave her a shrug in return. People constantly underestimated you and your intelligence. Besides, when you were a child, you had a morbid fascination with Greek mythology as a whole.

She stared beyond your shoulder, lilting her head to the side.

“I didn’t realize that Natasha’s new plaything was so knowledgeable.”

Ice ran thorough your veins. Your eyes darted to the window where Clint and Mrs. Sarkissian had once been. It was vacant now, and an expertly painted hand drummed past your arm. They were sharp and sent chills down your spine as she rounded you, sidling up next to Kate.

“Trust fund kid, leave us.”

Kate drew in a sharp breath, straightening her shoulders. She nearly opened her mouth to stay something but thought better of it before shooting you a look of apology and vanishing into the crowd in the dining room.

Ophelia was intoxicating in her presence. She towered over you and wore snakeskin heels to widen the distance. She wore a tight-fitted black dress that had cuts on either side, exposing her toned stomach to the world. What she wanted with you wasn’t clear, but her hand toyed coyly with the neckline of your own dress, adjusting it.

“Word travels fast in this city. I just couldn’t wait to see it myself. Hearing that Natasha Romanoff of all people expelled her Winter soldier for a… Summer Sentient. All seasons are temporary, I suppose.”

“Expelled?”

The word had slipped from your tongue, and you quickly thought better of it when she settled her splayed hand against your shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. It was cold, unfeeling. Unlike the fire that Natasha had instilled in you earlier.

There was a demonic smile that spread across her face, both of her eyebrows lifting as she let out an exaggerated grasp. It was clear that this woman, this leader, couldn’t keep her hands to herself in any manner, including the internal affairs that she dangled in front of you like a prize.

“Oh, did Natty not tell you? She had Bucky under her thumb for years, nearly a decade. A few months back, he was just gone. There’s a lot of gossip in these streets and not much of it is plausible, but I’d put money on this one.”

Again, her fingers danced over your collarbone. “Miss Romanoff is not known for her mercy, but after beating the Winter Soldier within an inch of his life, she let him go. He ran like any sensible man would, of course. But he left a trail of blood behind him. I’m quite sure he’s somewhere out west struggling to move in an upper body brace.”

She laughed cruelly at the look on your face. There was no use in masking it. You knew that Bucky had been absent, but through your own turmoil you had forgotten all about it. Your stomach twisted in unease. What if Natasha grew tired of you? It was inevitable, really. You’ only prolonged your fate by bending to her whim.

“Ophelia,” Natasha’s voice drew your attention first, and then the heat of her touch on the small of your back. “Have you tried the lamb?”

The woman faltered, gritting her teeth “I was about to.”

“Oh, you must.” Yelena seemed to materialize out of nowhere, looping her arm around Madame Hydra herself. She pulled with intent. “I haven’t seen you since Moscow. We need to catch up!”

“I was never in Moscow.”

“That’s a shame. I can paint you a brilliant picture.”

Their voices faded away into the rest of the party. It was then that you noticed Clint by the door, his stance stiffened. Kate glowered next to him, not following her own rule and downing the rest of her drink before plucking another off the passing tray.

You stepped out of Natasha’s grasp, not wanting to be anywhere near her at the moment. Her perfume was intoxicating. Its floral scent made you dizzy and took away your ability to think straight. It was part of the reason you had been lulled this far into complicity. It scared you that you were willing to do anything for her.

“y/n,” she urged.

“I don’t want to hear it.”

Natasha’s stare hardened. She gripped the back of your neck in a movement that would otherwise be familiar, sweet, even. However, the way she led you down the hallway made your stomach drop in a feeling of doom. “Not here, Malen'kiy krolik.”

Natasha’s office was strictly off limits, but you found yourself in the warmth of it in a matter of moments. There was no wall that wasn’t adorned with floor to ceiling bookshelves, and a large cherrywood desk was at its head. It was kept neat like the rest of the house.

There was a PHD on the wall, and an associates under that. Each bore Natasha’s name. She closed the doors behind her. Without regarding you, she went to a shelf in the back of the room, pouring herself a glass of bourbon, much like the one she was drinking when you stirred in her bed.

She swallowed it back, before pouring another. This time she sipped it. Your own back was against the far wall, heart pounding mercilessly through you. Yelling at Natasha had a lot more weight behind it than you anticipated.

“You’re going to do the same to me.” You eventually whispered.

Her body stiffened, muscles tightening and then releasing before she turned to you, her eyes reddened. “What?”

“I’ve been entirely blind to my purpose here. I’ve never… I’ve never understood why you chose me. Why not go for someone who knows what they were doing? Who knew how to protect you and care for you? You had that with Bucky.”

Her eyes hardened. “Don’t you ever mention that name in this house.”

“It’s the truth, Natasha! You could have let me die, just like that, and you didn’t. Instead, you took me in and trained me, and for what? Just to throw me into the harbor with cement blocks chained to my ankles.”

“That is an entirely outdated practice and frankly, it’s insulting.” Her words were soul deep, but they barely broke your skin. “I would never do that.”

“A bullet through the head, then?”

“No.”

You were gaining traction enough to pull yourself from the wall and take heady steps towards her. If you didn’t do it now, you would never. Part of you was certain that you’d never see the outside of this room again. That she’d snap and do exactly what you were imploring her to.

“He served you for years and within a singular night you nearly kill him.” Your breath shook, you were so close to her now. “What is stopping you from doing the exact same to me?”

“No, no” She reached up and grasped both sides of your face. There were tears against your cheeks, something you hadn’t realized dripped from your chin. “Malyshka, no don’t cry.”

Everything had come to a head; the months of non-stop training, the pressure of keeping this side of your life away from your daughter, away from Darcy. A true friend that you had been lying to. And now, knowing that it could be all for nothing. It was easy to dispose of someone like you.

There was no reason to show weakness in front of the woman who was training you not to feel anything at all. Above everything, you found yourself ashamed. She still held your face within her grasp.

“He hurt you.” Her jaw clenched and unclenched, there was a fuzzy vulnerability in her green stare. “I can show mercy, y/n. But I’ve learned, not when it comes to you. Even before all of… this, there was something that I saw within you. Something that made what I did to Bucky all the more worth it.”

You breathed in a watery sniffing sound that was replaced by nothing but a whimper. Natasha softened even more, letting her shoulders fall. She tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.

“He was pulling back for months, and you were the final straw. I had never seen someone so resilient, someone who didn’t beg for their life but recounted it. In a moment of weakness, I let you go. I thought that training you, that making you mine, would absolve my sins but it’s only deepened them. My feelings for you have only deepened.”

Her forehead was pressed against yours, her ministrations, and God help you, her apologies were startling. Her lips were so close to yours; you could nearly taste the liquor on her breath “Natasha,”

Suddenly, she was all you could feel. Her hand was against you back, pulling you into her body to fit directly on hers. There was such a strong guiding power to her. Your shock was muffled by her mouth on yours, your whine swallowed in moments.

You melted into her, kissing back with enough fever to leave you both breathless. There were stars dancing in your vision, you lungs burning eventually pulling you both apart. She panted twice before pecking your lips once more, you nearly chased after her.

“Fuck,” she growled “you… are absolutely delicious.”

Your cheeks suddenly heated up and you hid your face in the small of her neck, letting out a small groan in embarrassment. You felt Natasha’s laugh rumble through her.

“No need to be timid, pet. There will be plenty of time for that later.” She raked her nails up your back, “Right now, I have a snake to behead.”

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#Natasha Romanoff x reader #Natasha Romanoff x you #Natasha Romanoff x y/n #Natasha Romanoff #Natasha romanov #Natasha Romanov x reader #Natasha Romanov x y/n #Natasha Romanov x you #Marvel #Marvel Au #Mafia au #Kate Bishop #Yelena Belova #Clint Barton #bucky barnes

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chaxan08 · 2 months

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riedswifts · 2 years

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AFTER HOURS

NOMAD!STEVE X READER

Warnings : smut, barley plot, oral (f receiving), praise, slight size kink, desk sex, slight breeding, fingering, steve has a bit of a mouth, fluff (at the end ), some dumbification.

Summary : you and steve seem to have a mix of tensions and the top one being hate, but a night alone in the tower shows what the real problem is.

Word count: 2.8k

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Everyone had left out with their significant others, or friends or family. Nat had begged you to come but you kindly declined. Being on a long-standing mission, and nearly being on the brink of death literally- being an assassin and hanging off a building by a falling building is tiring. You also weren’t expecting some things and were worn out to the max.

You were under the impression everyone had left. Except Jarvis of course but that was a computer system. So you had no reason to wear full clothes and being a trained assassin leaves you in shape so you thought you’d be fine. Leaving your personal huge room in nothing but a black widow t-shirt and a pair of panties, no bra either, you just explored the tower in its glory during the night hours.

It was stunning to say the least and not to brag but you had one of the best views. Tony made sure your room had a floor to ceiling window with a space in it to go on the balcony that overlooked the city’s lights. It was payment in a way, you had nearly died saving his life quite a few times and even if he didn’t admit it you were his favorite on the team.

You had decided that you would go out on the very ledge thor and loki fought on. You had quickly snagged a bottle of any alcohol you could snag without stopping and made your way outside. You sat near the ledge but not fully on it. Your ankles hanging off the edge as you sat with your legs stretched out.

You held up the bottle and glanced at it ‘Daviun vodka’ you didn’t care for brands but this one seemed ok and the flavor was watermelon. So you popped off the top and set it beside you as you rested back on your elbows taking a swig and staring at the bottle after before shrugging with a satisfied hum.

You just relaxed not registering the sound of someone getting closer. It was a rare moment when you let your guard down but after all you had asked JARVIS prior to this if any one was here and the damn shit said no. Someone stood behind you and you slightly stiffened.

Without moving you acted clueless before in seconds you stood up and stunned the person as you broke the handle off the vodka and managed to flip them over onto their back holding the jagged edge to their throat. Bored blue eyes stared back at you with the upmost annoyed face.

You scoffed standing up completely forgetting your attire. You didn’t bother sticking your hand out to help him up, you just grabbed the bottle and started walking inside. You heard him scoff in disbelief but you didn’t care, he was a grade A dick after all- only to you- that was.

“Why are you here? Have no friends to go out with?” He asked trailing you inside. You rolled your eyes making a dramatic annoyance sound. “Do you?“ You shot back, it was a fifth grade response but you didn’t care in the slightest.

“Fifth grade response, Cute.” He said sarcastically and you with to cut his beard off and his throat but tony and natasha agreed no killing the super solider. stupid rules.

“What do you want steve?” You asked putting the bottle back, you started walking and made an abrupt turn into the small room. The one where everyone had sat and watched as they replayed a video of wanda accidentally destroying a building and killing people. It was empty, lights off, chairs pushed in.

You always came to watch TV in here because the projected screen was cooler to you. After all you didn’t have electronics until you escaped the red room with natasha. Steve still followed you in there but you ignored him as you picked up the projector remote.

Sitting on the table you slid back leaving from your knees down hanging off the table as he grumbled that you were ignoring him. “Do you have anything better to do than I don’t know..annoy me?” You asked rolling your eyes.

His eyes seemed to finally take in your appearance and you had neglected the fact that your nipples would poke through the thin t-shirt due to the coldness. His eyes darkened for a moment before he sharply directed his state to the screen. “Just genuinely curious as to what a looser like you decided to do when they’re alone.”

Your head snapped in his direction. “Oh fuck off steve.” You scoffed. Deciding to press play on the movie but before you could the remote was snatched out of your hand and you glared at him as he tossed it aside.

He stood right in front of you and you scooted backwards. Your eyes narrow in on him as he licked his lips running a hand over his beard. “What’s your fucking problem?” You asked extremely annoyed your night was ruined by the captain himself.

Though there was the faint throb between your legs that made you wanna stab your eyes out, how dare your own body betray you like that.

After the question left your mouth his eyes snapped back up to yours. His hair was slightly slicked back but looked like he had laid down in it because a few pieces had fell out. He paused staring at you making you slightly shiver. He saw the way your thighs slightly shifted to squeeze, the way your nipples poked through the thing t-shirt. He could faintly see the lace of your panties, he stared at you for a long moment.

Suddenly he grabbed your Ankle pulling you forward making you slid until you were right in front of him a mere inch from his nose as his hands rested on either side of you. “You see, my problem is, i can’t decide if i hate your guts or maybe it’s the frustration of not being able to rearrange them.”

Your eyebrows raised as your breathing sped up a bit. His eyes swapped between your eyes and lips, then they locked on your eyes maintaining eye contact as you felt the coldness of his avengers ring against your knee.

“Well then, maybe that’s a theory we need to test out.” You said as his hand slid up more leaving a trail of goosebumps before gripping your leg tightly. He smirked at how reactive you were to his touch.

He hummed before leaving you curious as he removed his hands. Suddenly they where on the curves on your ass pushing you flush against him, as if it was natural your legs spread allowing the bulge in his pants to press right against your now dampened panties.

Your back arched as you looked up at him and his lips crashed into yours, it wasn’t passionate, and soft- no. It was bruising, full of dominance and emotion. Obviously the fight for domination still stood and as an assassin you weren’t gonna give up.

However when his hands gripped your hips and rolled your hips against his you let out an involuntary humiliating moan. That allowed him to slip his tongue into your mouth and when he squeezed your ass he let you know, he had won.

You pulled away from him to breathe as you guys started at each other panting. His forehead came to rest against yours before laying you on the empty mahogany desk. He kissed you again bruising like as your hands started to wonder you tugged at his shirt and without disconnecting his lips from yours he took it off.

His hands slid up under your shirt cupping your breast and ran his thumbs over the hardened peaks. When your back arched it caused you to accidentally grind against him and this time you both moaned. He bit your lip before letting it go and kissing down your neck.

He sucked and bit making sure to suck each piece of smooth skin he could find. One of his hands pulled out from your shirt and cupped the back of your neck pulling you up before he pulled the shirt swiftly over your head.

He stared at you for a moment. “God, you’re stunning.” He whispered and before you could comprehend what was going on his mouth had latched on to your nipple sucking and slightly biting it making you moan.

He laid you back down and your mind fogged as you unbuckled his belt. However before you could do more he had grabbed both of your hands stopping his attacks on your boobs.

He pulled both your arms above your head and smirked down at your face, you looked stunning. Hair spread out and marks forming on your neck stopping above your breast. Your lips were swollen and bruised. He adored this sight.

God, he wish he had figured this out sooner, that instead of bitching he just actually fucked you. He didn’t think he’d find anything more addicting after seeing you in this state.

He kissed down your body stopping at the hem of your panties and deciding he was to impatient he tore them off making you whine. “i’ll buy you new ones.” He muttered as he got on his knees hooking his arms around your thighs. His hand pushing your stomach down.

You shivered as you felt the cold air of the tower directly on your bare pussy. Without a warning he shoved his face between your legs licking from your hole to your clit, the sensation made you gasp as your back arched.

“fuck!”

Steve groaned hearing the words fall out of your mouth. His tongue switched from sucking your clit to dipping his tongue in and out of you making you squirm. He looked up at you mouth and chin coated in slick. “Do not move your hands.”

Your brows furrowed as you continued to pant. “Wh-mmhh.” Your words turned into a soft moan when you felt one of his thick fingers slide in and bottom out. Your eyes pinched shut and your back arched off the table.

His other finger slid in as well and you tried to close your legs but he pulled them further apart. He watched your expression as he pulled them out almost fully before slamming them back in and curling them. He groaned and nearly came in his pants at the sight of you.

“Such a good girl for me.” He muttered before attaching his lips to your clit again and sucked on it whilst moving his fingers in and out. He Felt you tighten around him and couldn’t wait to see how you feel on his cock.

You were panting and babbling words of his name and please. What really sent you over the edge is when he sucked your clit with his teeth grazing it as he pumped his fingers harder curling them as your fingers locked him in.

Your orgasm crashed over you making your mind fog and your head limp to the side as pathetic whimpers left your plump and less swollen lips. He didn’t seem to care much that you had came all over his face because he kept sucking and licking up every last bit of cum.

You panted as you reached for his pants trying to tug them down as you recovered from your orgasm. When steve had finally freed his cock you assumed your face said it all because his chuckle was dark, taunting like.

He parted your legs again and you tried to close them but he roughly grabbed them pulling you closer to him but you let out a whimper when his huge side rubbed against your sensitive clit.

He made a mock frown face at you. “C’mon now sweetheart, be a good girl and take it for me, hmm?” He said as he massaged your breast with one hand and stroked himself. You nodded now desperate as the ache returned between your legs.

He let the tip slip in and he saw your face completely washed with pleasure. Brows furrowed, parted mouth, marks fully developed, and sweat beading your forehead. Without warning he pushed the rest of his way in and you gasp as he groaned.

You were used to sex of course you’ve had sex before but nobody was this big before. The intrusion felt good but the small sting was there lingering but it only added to the pleasure. “If you don’t stop squeezing’ me i’m gonna fucking cum.”

You relaxed around him and he groaned in relief. You felt more heavenly then he ever could’ve thought. He leaned down and captured your lips with his before thrusting with force and when he lifted one of your legs higher and he lifted your hips your eyes rolled back when he hit the spot that had you screaming his name.

“Look at you.” He said panting as he continued to thrust. “Takin it like such a good fucking girl.” With each word his thrust got harder and it made the breath get caught in your throat.

You grabbed his face kissing him harshly and he moaned into your mouth fueling the tightening in your lower stomach already. Suddenly he dropped you legs pushing them on the desk making them bend as he buried his face in the crook of your neck.

His thrust slowed to deep strokes. “You feel me, hmm?” He said and you moaned when he hit the spot inside you that had you babbling like a dumb person. Suddenly you felt the most unexplainable feeling.

It was like the tightness got tighter but mixed with a load of pleasure. You whimpered at the feeling as steve pushed his hand down harder on your lower tummy. “you feel that.” he panted as he thrusted again. “That’s how deep i am inside of you…”

“ohmygodohmygod.” was all you could babble as he pressed harder making the coil tighten up. “Steve- i’m gonna-“ He shut you up by kissing you as the hand that was pressing the bulge moved to your clit. “Do it, be a good girl and cum all over my cock.” He whispered as his thrust did not slow down.

He suddenly put his other hand behind your neck making you look down at his cock slipping in and out of you. “fuck- you see that?” He said as he kept moving in and out. Your hand was holding his wrist as his hand was behind your neck.

“C’mon- fuck!.” Steve said when you clenched harder around him. “give it to me.” he muttered as you laid back down and his fingers pinched and rolled your clit and he rubbed in a fast motion causing the coil to snap, your orgasm rushing over you like a tidal wave.

You blanked out for a moment, as black spots filled your vision and you’re pretty sure you said steve more times than any avenger had over the past years. You were moaning, sweaty, dazed and fucked out. Just how he wanted.

You got pulled back down when he kept running you and you whined tryna pull away. “to much.” you muttered and he mocked a frown. “Awe is my baby to fucked out? Look at you all dumb and can barley speak a full sentence.” He said and you moaned as he hit your over worked spot.

“You gonna be a good girl and let me cum inside of you hmm? Gonna fill you all up.” He muttered and you nodded. “Please- please cum inside of me.” your voice was hoarse and he held onto you tightly as his head went to your neck and you felt his thrusts getting sloppy before you felt ropes of cum deep inside you.

His head laid on your chest arms your arms circled his shoulder both of you laying there while his hands wrapped around you. He was slowly moving his hips pushing the thick cum into you deeper.

“Mr. Rogers? are you alright your heart rate seems exceptionally high? You as well Miss.” Steve who was Resting between your bare breasts chuckled making you smile.

“Oh i see Mr. Stark and the rest of them have returned. They’re parking.” Jarvis said and steve looked at you lifting you up as he looked at the cum mess on the table.

“Jarvis how much time do we have?” you asked as steve held you legs wrapped around his waist and due to the serum it was easy for him to hold your short frame up with one hand.

“Well five minutes starting now.” You and steve chuckled as you hopped down and cleaned the cum mess and he gathered your guys clothes.

“Good?” You asked fixing the chairs and everything. Steve nodded and Held his arm out and you jumped up wrapping your legs around his waist as he snuck out the room and ran up the stairs to his floor and shut the door.

“Guys?! Did you guys murder each other?”

That was all you heard from downstairs, before you guys bursted into giggles.

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creative-caramel-coffee · 27 days

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The Spiders Sister - Chapter 3

Summary: Reader meets the team.

Tw: mentions of sickness, teasing

Words: 2.8K

A/n: Thanks for all the support this series has been getting :) If anyone has any suggestions for things that could happen in this series lemme know and I’ll see what I think. No smut though I don’t write that here.

The next day you woke to knocking on the bedroom door. Sitting up in bed you quietly called for whoever it was to enter.

A moment later Wanda poked her head through the door. Seeing you awake or at least semi-awake she slipped through the small space she had created.

“Good morning.” She smiled coming to sit beside you on the bed. “Did you sleep well?” She asked pressed her hand to your forehead.

“Mmm.” You hummed still half asleep.

“You don’t feel warm anymore.” She smiled at this achievement as if she was proud of you. “How are you feeling today?” She asked moving her hands to rest in her lap again.

“Tired, but that’s probably because I just woke up.” You smiled.

“Nat sent me to wake you up. She wanted to know if your well enough to meet the others today.” Wanda explained looking slightly guilty.

“I mean, I’m game if you are. Where’s Nat?” You asked coving a yawn.

“Nat’s training with steve. And not so fast, I want to know more about how you're feeling. No more headache? Cough? Wheezing? Give me something.” She grinned.

“My headaches gone, no more cough, maybe a slight wheeze I’m not too sure.” You begun and Wanda’s brow furrowed slightly at the mention of your wheezing. “I’m like ninety-nine percent sure my fever is gone, and I feel pretty good all things aside.” You finished.

“That’s good. Maybe keep your inhaler on you today just in case. And after the meeting I’ll see if I can get Bruce to give us a few spares, just in case.” Wanda said softly.

“You really don’t have to.” You said shyly toying with a loose thread on the sheets.

“Its no problem. I would make me feel better. Breathing is important.” Wanda teased easing your concerns.

“So, when’s the meeting?” You asked.

“Well, I think Nat wanted to do it as soon as possible. Like straight after training and then I’m going to make you some pancakes for brunch.” Wanda said poking your side. “But for now, hop up, get dressed and I’ll be back soon to show you where the meeting room is.” Wanda said, standing up and heading for the door.

Once wanda had left, probably to go and find Nat to call the meeting, you crawled out of bed. Rifling through your backpack you changed out your sleepshirt and shorts for a pair of black track pants and a pale-yellow t-shirt. Throwing on some goofy socks and lacing up your black converse high tops you braided your hair sat in front of the mirror and threw on some deodorant.

Once you were ready and had been to the bathroom to wash your face and go through your morning routine, you sat at peters desk.

Picking up your backpack you went through it until finding what you were looking for.

Pulling out the black sketchbook you opened it to a fresh page and began mindlessly doodling things you could see around peters room and the cityscape beyond the open curtains.

Just as you were getting into the details of the New York skyline you heard a knock on the door.

Lowering your pencil, you sat a little straighter.

“Come in.” You called your voice sounding better than it had in days. And surprisingly good for someone who had spent hours coughing and wheezing for days on end.

Wanda opened the door and smiled seeing you up and about for the first time.

“You look much better.” She commented coming to stand by your shoulder. “Wow, you’re an amazing artist.” She smiled looking at your drawings.

“Oh, um … thanks.” You smiled still a little awkward when it came to compliments. “So, what’s the news?” You asked.

“Hmm? Oh, yes.” Wanda said looking up from where she had been inspecting your sketchbook. “Nat called Fury. He’s kinda the boss. He’s given the go ahead if steve and tony sign off on it. Nat then called a meeting and I’m going to bring you to the room where you're going to meet the team.” She explained.

“I have two questions.” You said.

“Shoot.” Wanda said pulling you up and gesturing to follow her out the door.

“One, is peter going to be at this meeting?” You asked as Wanda lead you down some seemingly endless corridors.

“Yes.” Wanda nodded, pressing the button to call the lift.

“And two, this Fury guy said yes? Just like that?” You asked sounding slightly confused.

“Yes and no.” Wanda begun, stepping onto the lift with you beside her. “Nat asked Jarvis, Tony’s AI assistant to pull up all CCTV footage of spider-man and separate footage based on bio-signatures. So, she could differentiate between when it was peter and when it was you in the suit. She sent Fury the files and after he reviewed them, he approved you a place on the team. If you want it and the others agree.” Wanda explained.

“Okay.” You said slowly. “Seems like a good plan.” You smiled.

And the lift dinged softly as it slowed to a stop.

“This is us.” Wanda said and you followed her out of the open doors. Walking beside her down a hallway she stopped in front of a door and paused to look at you. “You ready?” She asked, her hand on the door handle.

“Yep.” You nodded swollowing down your nerves. “Ready as I’ll even be.”

“You’ll be great. Just be yourself and they’ll love you.” Wanda said and pushed the door open.

Nat was stood at the head of the table, a screen behind her queued up with spider-man videos. She smiled at you and wanda as the rest of the people turned to face you.

Seeing the people you had only ever seen on Tv in real life was a little overwhelming at first but wanda squeezed your hand and lead you into the room to stand at the front with her and Nat.

Peter smiled at you from where he was sat beside Tony. Looking proud of you just for standing in front of the avengers.

You stood there silent for a second simply making eye contact with your shoes before Natasha spoke up.

“This is Y/n.” Nat begun, and you gave a small half wave with an awkward smile. Tony was staring you down with an unreadable expression. He looked like he was analysing your face mentally. Most likely already having connected you to Peter.

“Hi I’m Y/n Parker.” You said lifting your eyes to meet a few smiling faces around the room a fair few of them sporting shocked looks.

“Parker?” Tony echoed sounding smaller than you had ever heard from his times on Tv.

“Y/n Parker is Peters sister.” Wanda explained.

“Kid?” Tony looked hurt. “Why didn’t you tell me there were two of you?” He asked looking sad.

Peter looked slightly sick at the open disappointment his mentor was showing right now and so you stepped in before peter had a panic attack.

“Mr Stark, Sir, it was my decision to keep myself out of the spotlight. And to do that I needed to maintain a low profile. Which is harder to do when the avengers know of your existence. No offence.” You explained. And the team exchanged a few glances as they noted how you had come to Peter’s aid almost immediately.

“That’s alright, I’m sure Pete will open up now you’re here.” Tony said with a grin as he ruffled Peters hair, “Won’t-cha kiddo?” He asked with his usual charismatic charm and Peter gave a small nod and smile while he ducked his head not liking the attention.

“So, anyone have anymore questions?” You asked drawing the attention off of Peter once more much to your brothers' relief.

Looking away from the small smile he sent you as thanks you laughed, seeing every hand in the room up with a question for you, bar Nat, Peter and Wanda of course.

You looked to your left and nodded to Steve.

“Hi, nice to meet you kid.” Steve said. “I have a question though, if Peter’s identity is secret, why did you need to stay away from us?” He asked looking confused, and his statement drew a few nods around the room.

“If Tony scares you honey, I can assure you that the man would forget his own shoes without me.” Someone you recognised as Pepper Potts said with a smile causing Tony to grumble to himself. How Nat had managed to wrangle the CEO of Stark industries into this meeting you didn’t know.

Little did you know that all it took was ‘There’s something you should know, it has to do with Peter’ and she was on her way.

“Actually,” Wanda said drawing the gaze of the room to her, “This should explain it. Jarvis play the video.” She said and the lights dimmed as the Tv showed a compilation of some of your best moves in the spider-suit.

When the video ended the lights retuned to their normal brightness and everyone still looked confused.

“How exactly does a compilation of Peter doing tricks explain that?” Bruce asked.

“Um…” You said looking slightly nervous. “That was me.” You said in a small voice and the room was silent for a second.

“Sick moves kid. Peter your sister’s awesome.” Sam said and a few people laughed at his perfect comedic timing.

“Prove it.” Tony said and you paled slightly.

“Tony.” Pepper said placing her hand on his arm and shooting him a look.

“No, its ok pepper.” Nat said. “Jarvis?” Nat called to the ceiling. “Was that peter in the suit for those videos?” She asked.

“The height and weight as well as body stature and proportions do not match Master Parker.” Jarvis said.

“Ok,” Nat continued, “Who do those body descriptors match in this room?” She asked.

“The person in the suit does match the body of Miss Parker.” Jarvis said and Tony frowned.

“Do the sticky thing.” Bucky called drawing a few smiles. You rolled your eyes and put a hand up, splaying your fingers before jumping in the air and touching the ceiling where you stayed stuck.

“Crawl around.” Sam said and you glared at his heckling.

“No.” You said and you saw Peter doing his puppy eyes at you. “Fine.” You sighed.

Jumping up you did a flip and stuck your legs out, now standing on the ceiling upside down and making eye contact with Sam before looking to Bucky.

“Better?” You asked sarcastically.

“Much.” Sam grinned and you rolled your eyes again.

“Ok. Get down Y/n.” Nat said sounding part annoyed part amused at the display.

“Yes ma’am.” You said before detaching from the roof and doing a flip to landing back where you were before.

“Show off.” Peter murmured under his breath and you huffed a small laugh as his ears went red, not having expected you to hear him. Dumb super-hearing.

“Well, now we’re done with the party tricks. What are we thinking?” You asked brushing off invisible dirt from your clothes.

“Well…” Tony said. “I think its time you got your own suit.” He grinned and you smiled back. “What colours do you want kiddo?” He asked.

“Um… maybe something like purple, white and red?” You said and he nodded already sketching down ideas on a pad of paper pepper had brought with her from a meeting.

“You’re also getting an AI.” Tony added and you looked a peter who simply smiled proudly of you.

“Well, if that’s everything Y/n’s also gonna need a room.” Wanda said and Tony nodded.

“There’s a spare room on Natasha and Wanda’s floor if you want to move in with the girls. Do I need to send some movers to grab your things?” Tony asked and you looked at your shoes and shook your head.

“Not much to move.” You mumbled.

“Y/n’s apartment was taken out in the last battle. She’s been hiding out in Peter’s room for now. That’s how we met actually.” Natasha said shooting you a reassuring smile.

“Well, it sounds like I’m going to be funding yet another shopping trip.” Tony sighed and Wanda grinned at you mischievously.

“We’ll make it a girl's day.” Wanda said shooting a look at pepper.

“I’d love to.” Pepper agreed and Nat clapped her hands together.

“Alright then.” The assassin said. “I should probably tell Fury we have another spider on the team.” Nat grinned and you smiled at her.

“Great, now we have three spiders.” Tony said rolling his eyes and ducking as Pepper aimed a pretty good swing to the back of his head.

“Knock it off Tony, don’t act like you're not secretly overjoyed to have another Parker around.” Pepper said.

“Just wondering,” Bruce said looking mildly nervous as the room turned to look at him.

“Yes?” You prompted him to continue.

“Are you…” He begun before pausing, “I guess theres no real nice way to put it.” Bruce said and Tony jumped in.

“I think Brucie-bear wants to know if you come with the Parker Brain Package.” Tony said and Pepper glared at him.

“Tony.” She warned, glaring at him while you cleared your throat.

“If you’re asking about how smart I am, let’s just say I designed the original prototype for the web-shooters and chemical makeup of the fluid.” You said and Tony nodded seemingly satisfied with that small tidbit of information for now.

“Well, if nobody had anything else to say, Wanda and I are going to take Y/n for a tour of the compound.” Nat said before turning to look at Clint. “And you, have to make dinner. You lost our bet.” Nat said and then dragged you and Wanda out of the room by your sleeves.

After a very long and very comprehensive tour by Natasha and Wanda, you were shown back to the communal kitchen where most of the team ate together when they weren’t on missions.

You walked into the dining room attached to the kitchen to be hit with the smell of burnt food pungent in the air.

You looked at Nat confused, and she grinned as she heard cursing coming from the kitchen. Wanda looked like she was itching to go help but sad she pulled away Nat grabbed her sleeve at the very last second to hold her back.

“Can someone explain whats going on for me?” You asked.

“Well, Clint and Natasha can’t cook if their lives depended on it.” Wanda begun, only to shush Nat when she went to speak up. “So naturally they made a bet, loser had to cook the team dinner, naturally Clint lost so Nat is enjoying his public humiliation. And I normally cook if we aren’t getting takeout so it's causing me pain to hear whats going on in there.”

“Oh, calm down. Clints not blowing anything up.” Nat said rolling her eyes as Wanda shot her a look. “Ok that was one time.” Nat amended.

Not twenty minutes later you were sat at a table with the avengers with a plate of very burnt stake and watery mash potatoes.

“What is it?” Tony asked poking his steak.

Clint grinned. “A masterpiece.” He said.

“More like a mistake.” Nat muttered judging her steak while poking it with her knife as if she was expecting it to start moving of its own accord.

“I say we have newbie try it.” Tony posed and you rolled your eyes.

Cutting off a piece of the very tough steak with your knife you raised it to your lips and put it in your mouth.

It was tough and kind of disgusting. But you smiled anyway.

Finding the meat tougher than you had been expecting, you made the switch as you called you fangs up. Your canines sharpened as you chewed managing to decimate the meat. Swallowing you looked at Clint.

“Not the worst thing I’ve every eaten.” You said with a smirk and Tony who had been watching you closely squeaked.

“Jeez kid you didn’t tell me your sister was a vampire.” Tony said turning to Peter.

By this point most of they eyes were on you, so you hid your teeth and retracted the fangs out of embarrassment.

“She’s not. It’s a spider thing she got.” Peter said coming yo your defence.

“Either way her new name is fangs.” Tony said with a grin.

This time you glared at him.

“For the record i think they’re awesome.” Wanda said sensing your embarrassment.

“Seconded.” Nat said her spy training honing in on your body language to see you were insecure about it.

“I gotta admit it’s a cool trick doll.” Bucky said.

“Pretty neat.” Steve agreed with a smile.

“Badass.” Sam nodded flicking a still frozen pea at Bucky. “Alright, now that y/n probably has food poisoning, who wants pizza?” Nat asked with a grin. Cheers came from all sides of the table as Clint slumped dejectedly in his seat.

PART 4

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wandamaximoffsbadgirl · 3 months

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MCU Play toy Headcanons

18+ MDNI

A/N: This is my first time posting anything like this. I wrote this up a while ago and finally decided to post it. Please ignore any spelling errors!

-Y/N gets hired by Tony for the rest of the team as a way to de-stress after missions

-Y/N gets used by most of the Avengers on the daily, but is always happy to please.

-Y/N is a switch but most of the Avengers are doms

-Y/N loves when they're lounging around and then someone will come up and just start fucking them no matter where it is

-living room? Fucked. Kitchen? Fucked. Meeting room? Fucked. Meeting room during a meeting? Oh honey you're in for a good time.

-Y/N has their own room and bed, but tends to sleep on the floor of someone else's room because that's what good pets do

-Y/N will sometimes get to sleep with someone for the night, usually Wanda who is a soft Dom and likes being called Mommy. She loves holding her baby. To Wanda you're her baby not her pet and that makes you feel special

-Nat is into some darker stuff that you didn't realize you liked until she introduced you to them (knife play, noncon con, somnophilia, omorashi, branding, dacryphilia, breeding)

-Nat has a dick and you would never pick favorites, but hers is your favorite

-Steve likes regular sex, but is super rough and into hair pulling and choking

-Loki uses his magic to make you fall fast into sub space and big on degrading.

-Thor is the opposite and only ever praises you he loves calling you princess

-Bucky is rough with you, but praises the whole time on how well you're doing, calls you doll as his nickname for you

-Bruce refused to use you at first and it wasn't until after him and hulk were able to live harmoniously that he fucked you, “Oh look at you big boy. I don't know if you'll fit like this.” “I'll make it fit and you'll take it all.” You do.

-Tony, Rhodey, Scott, Clint and Sam all don't fuck you as they have their own things going on.

-You thought Kate would be gentle with you, but she ends up being pretty rough and talks you through everything, grounding you in the moment which overwhelms you with pleasure.

-Yelena, who you thought would be rough, is actually a sub, a little at that. Her childhood ripped away from her and now she just wants ‘Mommy’ which you have no problems giving her.

-Tasha feels really uncomfortable at first when Yelena and Kate join the Avengers since Yelena is her sister.

-You understand why, but you have to remind her it's still your job

-Yelena is huge on physical touch and requires it often. Skin to skin is best.

-speaking of love languages you try your best with everyone's love languages as you all get to know each of them

-Steve is words of affirmation and quality time. Always tell him how good he's doing and you guys go on “dates” having dinner or watching a movie or doing a puzzle

-Bruce is acts of service and quality time. This usually involves you being in the lab and helping him whenever he needs it.

-Thor is WoA, physical touch, and quality time. He likes taking you out and experiencing new things

-Natasha is WoA and acts of service. You always praise her while you're fucking, “oh your cock is amazing! It fits me perfectly!” Saying things like that sends Nat over the edge.

-Loki is mainly all about physical touch. When you two are out he always has a hand or an arm on you

-Wanda's is quality time and WoA. You two love watching sitcoms her favorites are the old ones and yours are the new ones like The Office and Big Bang Theory

There comes a point where you realize that you actually love each and every Avenger, and it worries you that they only see you as a toy, but it's the farthest thing for them mostly.

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imtryingbuck · 5 months

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Is Being In Love Always Painful?

~ gif not mine credit to owner ~

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader, Bucky x Natasha

Summary: Your in love with Bucky but he marries Nat

Word count: 636 shes a shorty

Warnings: Angst, swearing, Nat being a bad friend? Terrible writing as always

A/N: there will be another two parts

Masterlist Series Masterlist

Loving him was easy. But he wasn’t yours to love, no that was for your best friend. You still loved him with every inch of you.

Why? Because loving James ‘Bucky’ Barnes was easy.

You met him at school, he was your first friend actually. Starting a new school was terrifying especially when you don’t know anyone there. Ms Donovan paired you up with him so he could show you around, he made sure you ate with him and his friends, made sure no one picked on you. He was easy to be friends with.

He took you to prom when Jimmy Holland bailed on you, and that’s when you knew you was in love with him. His smile made your heart skip way too many beats to be normal, he danced and laughed the whole night with you. Prom was amazing just because of him.

You went to different colleges and even with the distance you still kept in touch, seeing each other twice a month, three times if you were really lucky.

Natasha became your best friend straight away since you both shared a dorm and you were into the same things. Nat knew of your feelings for Bucky so one day she told you to go and tell him, she even paid for the bus tickets. You stood there outside Bucky’s dorm going over your words that you selected carefully for the umpteenth time. You were both surprised, him being that you were there and you being that he had a pretty brunette standing behind him and him introducing her to you as his girlfriend. You left shortly after with some lame excuse that he either believed or simply didn’t care.

You went back to Nat and cried.

With graduation four months away, you finally introduced Nat and Bucky to each other and honestly didn’t think anything of it since Nat knew of your feelings.

A few weeks later Nat walked in to the kitchen as you was making dinner, shuffling back and forth. “Y/N umm I need to ask you something” Her voice was small which was something it never was. Giving her a nod she continued “so um Bucky asked me out on a date and I said yes, I just really like him and since he’s your best friend I wanted to know if that’s oka- shit are you okay?” You sliced your finger with the knife which hurt but not compared to the pain in your heart. But you couldn’t say anything, so you nodded. The night of their date, you cried and after their date you slept with headphones on just so you didn’t have to listen to them having sex.

It’s been three years since graduation and you were in the jewellers with Bucky. To get an engagement ring. He’s going to propose to Nat.

You were there when she squealed with joy, nodding so fast you thought her head was going to come off.

You said yes to being her maid of honour, you did everything for her. Helped plan the perfect wedding for your best friend and the man you were madly in love with.

You stood there watching Bucky cry as he watched Nat walk down the aisle towards him.

You watched as they exchanged vows.

You stood in the corner of the hall and watched them have their first dance as husband and wife.

You did it all with a smile on your face even with your heart breaking.

Long after the newlyweds and guests left you was still in the hall cleaning up. Steve was supposed to help but you waved him off telling him to enjoy his night with Peggy. All alone in the room you let the tears fall.

Loving Bucky was so easy but also extremely painful.

Next>

~ banners credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

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writerslittlelibrary · 4 months

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So, I'm not a prisoner?

masterlist part 1 part 2 part 3 extra

summary: you did not expect that your mission to take down the traitor, could end in such a difficult situation for you…

pairing: Natasha x Red Room teen reader

warnings: fighting, weapons, stabbing, blood, implied sexual abuse

genre: fluff, angst

words: 3073

a/n: I wanted to do a fic like this for so long!!!! anyway, I just kept scouting tumblr trying to find fics like this, so I figured I’d finally write one myself :)

You do not have my permission to repost, copy or translate my work

|——————————— ⴵ ———————————|

A quick in and out. That was your mission. How on earth did you manage to screw it up so bad. In and out. Assassinate the traitor and come right back.

Dreykov would’ve been so proud.

But that didn’t happen. No. Every single aspect about that night failed to go according to plan. You snuck into the event Stark had hosted, was able to blend in with the other party goers, and you were able to hide when most of the people started to leave.

Once it was just the Avengers left, you stayed in your hiding spot, observing them. You were here to kill Natasha Romanoff, and Natasha Romanoff only.

You could not afford any casualties, so you had it all planned out.

You’d wait until the Avengers would leave, and you’d take Natasha out before she could make it to her living quarters. You knew that once she made it to the living space of the Avengers tower, getting to her would be a lot harder.

However, against all odds, Natasha excused herself from the group quite early, saying she wanted to get a good nights sleep.

You internally cursed yourself, hating that this wasn’t something that you had planned for.

Around the couches were still some Avengers sat. You recognised all of them. Clint Barton shouldn’t be too much trouble. He was only a guy who’s good with a bow. For Maria Hill could be said the same thing, except she’s very skilled with a gun.

No, you were worried about the other Avengers still seated. Tony Stark could call upon his armour in mere seconds. Thor had the power of thunder for god’s sake. Wanda Maximoff has exceptional powers, and therefor, if you were to attack with her still in the room, you’d be immobilised in an instant.

You were fairly certain you didn’t need to worry much about Bruce Banner. Sure, he could turn into the Hulk, but he didn’t turn often, and lately, the Hulk hasn’t been spotted in the battlefield, meaning he probably had many trouble turning into him.

Pietro Maximoff shouldn’t bring you a lot of trouble either.

Your main concern were Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers. One Super Soldier you could handle, but two? While fighting the rest of the Avengers? That wasn’t going to work.

Lucky for you, Wanda Maximoff had excused herself from the gathering a while ago. If you didn’t make to much noise, she wouldn’t be much of a problem. You could be outside before she’d even make it to the party deck.

Your original plan was to just wait. Natasha Romanoff would have usually sat through a party until far into the evening. You’d know, you’ve been watching her for weeks.

However, now that Romanoff has announced she was returning to her bedroom, a slight panic ran through your body.

Dreykov gave your 5 weeks to finish this assignment. That’s longer than any assignment you’d ever been on. You could not disappoint him with this. You had to kill the traitor.

You figured now was your only chance, and so, as Natasha Romanoff made her way towards the elevator, you followed her.

However, not even to your surprise, she stopped in the middle of the hallway.

“You know I’m an assassin, too? You’re good, but you’re not un noticeable,” she states, calmly turning around, being met with a gun to your face. The moment she stopped, you were wise enough to draw your gun, holding her at gunpoint for any sudden movements.

You could see a slight surprise appear on her face, before her face returned to her poker face once again.

“You’re just a child…” Natasha spoke slowly, seeming almost disappointed.

“You’re a traitor,” you spoke, loading the gun, taking a step closer. Natasha simply shook her head. “I’m sorry,” she spoke, before leaping towards you. You shot your gun, but Natasha was too fast, avoiding your gunfire as she ran past you, back to the other Avengers.

How on earth could you have missed that shot? She was right there.

Pathetic.

You don’t hesitate to run after her, determined to finish this tonight.

Very much not to your surprise, the moment you run back into the party hall, the Avengers are already standing up and ready. Ready to fight you.

You don’t hesitate to move forwards, and after fighting Clint Barton for mere seconds, you quickly realise they have no intention of hurting you. You could use that to your advantage, and you do.

You kick Barton hard, leaving him on the floor, heaving for air as you move forward, taking on Maria.

However, the moment you get close to Maria, two strong arms wrap around your body, pulling you back. They’re holding you tightly, and it doesn’t feel like they’re planning to let go.

You struggle in the hold, fighting against who ever is holding you as you try to break free. A small panic runs through your body. The fear of being captured by the Avengers taking place in your mind. You do not fear the Avengers, but the thought of being seen as a traitor by Dreykov hurts your heart more than words could describe.

“Stop struggling. We can help you,” you hear a voice behind you speak, and you soon come to realise the person you’re fighting is Captain America himself.

No wonder you couldn’t get loose.

Knowing it’s a Super Soldier, you’re quick to outsmart him, making him think you’re getting tired, relaxing your body is his hold. Because of this, the Captain lightens his grip a bit, giving you enough room to wiggle your arm free, moving it backwards to hit him in the face with your elbow.

Because of the surprise, he lets you go, allowing you to stand again.

The moment your feet hit the ground, you dash forward, holding up your knife as you use everyone’s shock to your advantage.

Everyone is surprised by your capability of escaping Steve’s grasp, not realising your already moving towards Natasha again. You reach her quickly, stabbing your knife into her stomach as far as it can go.

Natasha gasps, and you pull the knife out, watching as all the blood starts to seep from her stomach.

Slowly, Natasha sinks to the ground, Maria catching her, helping her down.

You move towards Natasha again, determined to get the job finished, but are quickly stopped by another pair of arms wrapping around your waist. You immediately recognise the metal arm, knowing that the Winter Soldier holds you in his grasp. You can’t escape him. You never have.

He pulls you backwards, pushing you to the ground as he tries to punch you. However, you regain yourself quickly, rolling away from under him and kicking him in the face.

Suddenly, you’re moved across the room. You forgot the damn speedster…

You raise your knife quickly, stabbing him before he has a chance to make another move.

“PIETRO!” you hear a voice yell, and you turn your head to the right. Shit. Wanda Maximoff must have heard the commotion and went down to take a look. You have to get out of there. You will never win a fight with her.

You move quickly, running towards the stairs. However, before you could reach them, you felt a stabbing pain in your left shoulder, the sound of a gun shot following soon after. You had been shot. Bucky Barnes had shot you in an attempt to slow you down.

But you didn’t let it.

Instead, you went towards the stairs a little quicker, dashing down the hundreds of flights of stairs to get to the main floor.

Of course, all SHIELD agents on the main floor were already expecting you, and you were followed by Steve Rogers, but you were quicker than him. You knew that.

You dashed past all the SHIELD agents, avoiding their gun fire as you made it towards an emergency exit.

The moment you stepped outside, you started your escape route. You already planned it, knowing exactly which way to go, no matter which way you would exit.

Steve followed you outside, but the moment he set foot outside the door, you were gone. You had disappeared into the night, leaving no trace.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Back in the Avengers tower, the team was recovering from your attack. Natasha was in bad shape. Your strike had been an attempt to murder her, and you didn’t miss any organs as you pierced your blade through her abdomen.

Pietro was much better. He was back on his feet quickly, seeing as though you stabbing him hadn’t been a murder attempt. You merely wanted to distract him.

It didn’t take long for Natasha to get back on her feet either, even though she was advised to stay on bed rest after the surgery.

Natasha was determined to find you, and she quickly got to work.

Even though you had made it out of the Avengers tower quickly, you were still hurt, and some of you blood had fallen on the floor as you made your escape towards the stairs. Clint and Maria had collected that blood, running multiple tests, only to find out you were not registered anywhere.

There was no record of your existence. Were you just another ghost story?

What they did find were traces of the Super Soldier serum. However, they were modified, almost as if they were genetically a part of your system.

Did that mean you were just another Hydra experiment? Natasha did hear you calling her a traitor. That had to mean you knew Dreykov, right? Who else viewed her as a traitor. I would make sense. Sending a modified teenage assassin after her, knowing Natasha was above killing children.

Even in the Red Room, she always hesitated when sparring against the younger students.

Dreykov must have had a lot of faith in you to send you after her. Natasha can only hope you’re not a graduate yet…

-------------------------------------------------------------

After the incident in the Avengers tower, you had fled to Germany. You figured it was best to leave the United States completely. And why would they ever search for you in Germany?

You had rented an apartment, loving the small town you had chosen. Dreykov had given you 5 weeks to finish the assignment, and now, you had only 1 week left. There is now way that you’re going to succeed in killing Natasha within the week.

They know you are after her now, and they will be prepared for you to make a return. You screwed it up.

Sloppy.

Right now, you were just heading back to your apartment. You had taken a walk, deciding to make the most out of the freedom you had in the moment. The week would be over soon, and the moment Dreykov would send for your return you are certain you will not be seeing daylight any time soon.

After you arrived in the apartment building, you instantly felt watched.

Had the Avengers found you?

You made your way up to your apartment, pushing the key into the lock and walking through the small hallway. Someone was in here, you could feel it.

You walked into the kitchen, grabbing a glass and filling it with water, keeping your back towards the living room.

“There are not a lot of places to hide in this apartment,” you spoke aloud into the emptiness of the apartment. Soon you heard a set of footsteps, and you felt another presence enter the room.

“You’re very skilled for your age,” you heard a voice behind you say, and you immediately recognised it as Natasha’s.

“And you are stronger than you look. I mean, even for you, I didn’t expect you to be on your feet so quickly,” you stated, turning around slowly. Natasha wasn’t holding a weapon in your face, something you were definitely expecting.

You scanned her quickly, seeing the weapons she held on her belt.

She didn’t come unarmed. Good. She’d be stupid to.

“I don’t mean you any harm,” Natasha said, taking a small step forward as she held her hands in the air, showing you her every movement.

You didn’t look impressed, instead just staring at her as she moved.

“Then you are a fool,” you told her, and you spotted a small smirk flashing over Natasha’s face. “And you are very full of yourself,” she said, moving towards the kitchen island, leaning on it.

“I can’t say I blame you. You took on a lot of the Avengers on your own. Even two Super Soldiers. That’s impressive,” she stated, giving you a small smile. You didn’t return it.

“What? Jealous someone better took your place when you betrayed us,” you asked Natasha, determined to get on her nerves.

Natasha’s smile dropped quickly.

“Quite the opposite, actually. I hoped no one would ever have to go through it again,” she told you, a hint of regret almost identifiable in her expression. Now it was your time to give her a small smile.

“You think you’re so important that everything should’ve ended with you?” you asked her, moving towards the kitchen island as well, setting your glass down, still holding onto it.

Natasha shook her head.

“What I am curious about, however, is the genetic Super Soldier serum that runs through your DNA,” Natasha paused, adjusting her stance before speaking again. “Tell me, was your dad a Super Soldier?”

You let out a huff of amusement, surprising Natasha.

“You think I believe you’re just here for a conversation? There are SHIELD agents placed on every corner of every street. Don’t think I didn’t notice it. The lovely young couple, drinking coffee at the restaurant downstairs? Amazing disguise, if you were trying to trick nine year olds,” you stated, finishing your glass of water.

Natasha smiles, clearly impressed with your observations.

“You’re right. I’m not here for just a conversation, although I do hope we can prevent violence,” Natasha started, but before she could continue you interrupted her.

“You’re here to bring me in.”

Natasha nodded, and the look on her face was almost apologetic.

“No one needs to get hurt. If you just come with me, there’s a big chance you could avoid confinement,” Natasha explained, yet you just scoffed and shook your head.

“Avoid confinement? Yeah right. There is no way, that after what I have done, your people won’t lock me away.”

“I can be very persuasive,” Natasha simply replied.

There was a small silence. Natasha knew you were debating your options. You didn’t seem like a brainwashed sheep. She knew that you knew better than trusting Dreykov’s lies. Sure, you still believed she was a traitor, but there is no way that you didn’t see that what Dreykov is doing is wrong.

“You know going back after a failed mission will result in punishment,” Natasha started, trying to get through to you. Trying to give you that little push you needed to go with her. “If you go with me, you’ll never be punished like that ever again,” she finished.

You looked up, deep in thought.

“How could you be so sure?” you asked her, and Natasha didn’t hesitate to respond.

“We can keep you safe-”

“I found you. I nearly killed you. Who’s to say some other Widow won’t come after me as well?” you replied, and Natasha gave you another small smile.

“I escaped the Red Room when I was 20,” Natasha started. “It took him 12 years to send someone after me. We will make sure we’ll take him down before he even has the chance to come after you.”

“How many times, did you try to kill him, exactly? Because I believe you attempted his murder twice already, both of which you failed. You blew him up in Budapest, and then another time when you took the air facility down. Do you honestly think you’ll succeed now?”

Natasha shook her head, seemingly recollecting her thoughts.

“I failed twice, and that was sloppy, but both times I didn’t have the Avengers on my side. You ran the moment you saw Wanda. You know what she is capable of. Taking down the Red Room for good shouldn’t be too difficult with the Avengers on our side,” Natasha explained, yet you just shook your head.

“I’m not like you,” you told her, yet Natasha just looked at you in confusion.

“I’m not some disposable widow like you were. I’m more important,” you explained, and Natasha gave you a sad smile.

“Everyone is just a disposable widow to him,” she started, but you interrupted her.

“I’m not. You tested my blood. You know I carry the Super Soldier serum. I’m not just some girl he picked up from the streets,” you explained, and Natasha gave you a small nod, encouraging to keep going.

“I can’t explain it, but he won’t just let me walk. He put too much time in my creation. He would never just let it go to waste,” you finished, looking down, avoiding Natasha’s gaze as you turned around, putting your glass by the sink.

“We’ll help you. I know that we can,” Natasha tried.

“Is it worth the risk? My life is not great, but it’s not terrible either. Dreykov values me, and I am not treated like a piece of meat, unlike you might suspect.”

“So the punishment is worth it, then? Knowing that in three days time, Dreykov will have you be recollected, and once you return to the Red Room, you’ll be punished severely for a failed mission,” Natasha paused, allowing you to let her words sink in.

“Or, in three days time, you could know you can go to bed without worrying about someone joining. You could know you can be safe, and sleep through the night without anyone disrupting you. Knowing that, is the choice really that hard?” Natasha finished, and you were almost at your breaking point.

Was it worth it? Was going back the best decision? Dreykov would hurt you, you knew that, but you deserved it. Didn’t you?

“Please, just come with me. We can help,” Natasha spoke, nearly begged.

You sighed deeply.

“Fine, but if you put me in a cell, I will go on a murder streak,” you told her, and Natasha let out a chuckle, before seeing your facial expression, and realising you were dead serious.

“Duly noted,” Natasha said, before motioning you towards the door.

What had you done…

Permanent tags: @marvelnatasha12346 @lesbionion @nova-kyle @darkstar225 @saraaahsstuff @marvelwomenarehot0 @screechcat @iheartjohansson @simp-erformarvelwomen @swaqcenix @karmasgxrl @marvel-lous3000 @mxximoffswifey

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talesofely · 5 months

Text

Save My Tears (2)

A Sequel (Part 2) to The (Wo)Man Who Can't Be Moved. (Part 1)

Pairings : Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Summary : Natasha's your ex-girlfriend, she broke up with you without giving you a solid reason as to why. Obviously, you want her back. One problem, she's unofficially dating Bucky Barnes. So you decided to solve it with a little performance.

Warnings : Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending (or is it?😏), swearing, one line used 'her' as reader's pronouns, pls tell me if u see anything else

Word Count : 2.1k

Note : here's pt2 ! pls let my family go now :c

Natasha.

Natasha didn't want to attend tonight's party. 'Cause the last party she went to was with you. The last party she went to, she was clinging onto your arm. The last party she went to, she slept in your arms.

Unlike you, who always asked if you could be her date for the night, Bucky asked her to be his date for tonight. Normally Natasha wouldn't notice those miniscule things, but it was just so different from you.

Unlike you, who always insisted on picking her up from her room, Bucky just waited for her at the elevator.

Bucky brought her a bouquet of roses when they met at the elevator! You never bought her a bouquet of real roses... cause you always gave her paper ones, ones you knew she would appreciate more since they don't wither.

Bucky asked how he looked and said that Natasha looked perfect to be his date. You always told her she looked amazing, and joked about not looking good enough to be her date.

Bucky bought her a drink and a stronger drink for himself, like a gentleman. You always got the lesser alcoholic ones since you wanted to stay sober enough to take care of her in case she gets drunk.

She hated comparing him to you. But she couldn't help it. His arms just don't compare to yours.

She shook her head to clear away any thoughts about you, wanting to focus on her night with Bucky. She subconsciously searched the crowds for you, but she couldn't find that y/h/c hair that she could always find in the midst of the crowds.

Bucky asked her to dance. They stood in the middle of the makeshift dancefloor. Everyone's eyes were on them, she didn't like it. You always knew she felt uncomfortable being the center of attention. Bucky seemed to like it, though.

She saw how Bucky signaled Steve to sing. Mouthing a song title she wasn't able to read. Steve seemed skeptical at first, but the questioning look from Bucky caused him to concede and sing the song.

When 'Wonderful Tonight' started playing, Natasha's eyes winded. It was your song. The song you always sang to her. The song you two danced together. She's dancing it again, just not with you.

She tried her best to smile, and tried her best to not imagine you as she danced with Bucky.

She remembered how you used to sing the song in her ear as you two slowly danced around the kitchen, at 2am, using the refrigerator light as light, whenever she had nightmares.

"Oh, my darling, you were wonderful tonight" You—Bucky—whispered in her ear as the song came to an end. You—Bucky—kissed her forehead as you two pulled away.

She was going to excuse herself to the bathroom to clear out her thoughts when the next singer caught her attention.

It was you.

I saw you dancing in a crowded room

You look so happy when I'm not with you

You looked so breathtaking, she thought. Oh how she would've loved to arrive and leave with her in your arms. But she couldn't. She was in Bucky's arms.

"Hey, everyone. I hope y'all are having an amazing night. I do hope you enjoy these songs I'm about to play." You said as you clicked the instrumental version of the song you chose, on the tablet.

She couldn't deny how much she missed your voice. How much she longs to hear that voice say those 8 letters she used to hear everyday from you.

But then you saw me, caught you by surprise

A single teardrop falling from your eye

When your eyes met, she didn't know what to feel. She didn't know whether to feel happy, to feel sad, to feel hurt, or to feel angry that she let you go.

That bittersweet smile you gave her, hurt her in ways she didn't even know was possible. She got shot before, she got stabbed, she got punched and kicked multiple times before, but this type of pain is something she's never experienced before.

She wanted to run up to the stage and beg for your forgiveness while hugging you tightly when she saw the single tear falling from your eye.

I don't know why I run away

I made you cry when I run away

She left before the song ended. She ran away, again. She ran to the rooftop. The place where you two always ran together to.

She didn't even notice Bucky following her.

Wanda Immediately approached you when you got off stage. She pulled you into a hug before pointing at the stairway up to the rooftop.

"She's up there. Go follow her, please. Bucky followed her, I'm worried it might not end well for Bucky." She said with a wince, remembering the last time someone tried to approach Natasha while she had so many emotions running.

You bit your lower lip, your hesitation was strong. But the worried look from Wanda was enough to make you run up.

"Leave me alone for a minute, Buck." You heard Natasha say, trying to control her emotions. Her hands are gripping the rails so tightly, her knuckles were turning white.

"What's wrong Tash?" The nickname he used wasn't helping. You used to call her that all the time.

"Please, Bucky, just 5 minutes. Please." She pleaded, you noticed her grip was getting tighter.

"Just tell me what's wrong, Natasha!" He raised his voice. Something you never did in all your years you two dated.

"For fuck's sake I still love her! I still fucking love Y/N so much, that it actually hurts! Is that what you wanted to hear?!" Natasha finally screamed back, turning to face Bucky directly. Tears were rolling down her cheeks.

"Я так скучаю по ней, Bucky, which is stupid cause I was the one who broke her heart. So I have no right to act like it hurts me more, but it still hurts so much." She murmured, not even caring that she was crying in front of Bucky. (translation : I miss her so much.)

"What?" Bucky couldn't believe it. He thought they were both in love, he was even going to ask her to be his girlfriend officially tonight. "Leave, please." Natasha forced herself to calm down, glaring at Bucky as he shamefully walked towards the stairwell where you were.

When Bucky saw you, he tried his best to give you a genuine smile. "Her heart's still yours. Don't lose it." He said as he gave your shoulder a pat and walked away.

You took a deep breath before approaching Natasha.

"Tasha." Just one word from you was enough to gain Natasha's attention. She turned around in surprise, wiping her tears hastily.

"Y/N? What're you doing here?" She tried her best to act calm, using all her spy skills to act collected in front of you. But you both know that you could see right through it.

"Was it true, Natasha? You told Bucky you still love me. Were you telling the truth?" You asked carefully, not wanting to overwhelm her. You leaned your back against the railings beside her, she had her arms leaning against it as she looked at the busy streets below.

"What are you going to do if I said yes?" She answered your question with her own question. You just shrugged, staring up into the stars.

You felt her shiver when a particularly strong wind blew past you. Instinctively, you gave her your jacket.

You could've asked me why I broke your heart

You could've told me that you fell apart

"Why aren't you asking me why I left? Why I ran away? Why aren't you screaming at me? Why aren't you mad at me?" She said after you placed your jacket on her shoulders. She was frustrated at herself for ending things with you. She was also frustrated as to why you weren't hating her like she thinks she deserves.

"What's the point of getting mad? Being mad at you won't get you back, it won't help me understand why you left either." She hated how understanding you were. It made her guilt grow bigger with every word you say.

"I really want to ask something though," She looked at you expectantly, thinking of possible questions you could ask. "Why'd you run away?" You felt her breath hitch when you finally let those words leave your tongue. You were also nervous yourself, not knowing what to expect from your ex-girlfriend.

"I was scared." She took a deep breath before continuing, "You're just too perfect. We were so perfect that it terrified me. Nothing stays that good that long. Everything had consequences. Maybe the consequence for me was that you moved on so quickly."

But you walked past me like I wasn't there

And just pretended like you didn't care

Your brows furrowed. 'You moved on too quickly'?

"But I haven't moved on, Nat. What gave you the idea that I already did?"

"You just walk past me everyday at the compound ever since you returned. I thought you didn't care about it anymore." She finally looked at you, both your eyes meeting like they were always destined to meet.

"'Cause I didn't want to hold you back, Natasha. I thought it'd help us both move on if we acted like nothing happened. I guess it didn't, I'm sorry." You were always so nice. Natasha hated it. She hated the fact that she feels like she's abusing your kindness and that she couldn't do anything about it.

Take me back 'cause I wanna stay

Save your tears for another

"Does that mean you still love me?" Natasha hesitantly asked, biting her lower lip.

"Of course, Tash." You said with a small sad smile. A smile immediately made itsm's way to her face. But when she saw your smile, her's faltered and her brows furrowed.

"I'm assuming there's a 'but' to that sentence?"

You nodded slowly, giving her a smile that made her worries grow.

"I never stopped loving you, Tasha, just... not in the same way as before." Natasha felt her heart drop. No matter how much she tried to stop the tears from falling, she couldn't stop them when she heard those words from you.

"What do you mean, Y/N?"

Yeah, I broke your heart like someone did to mine

And now you won't love me for a second time

You bit your lower lip, trying to find the right words to explain it properly to her.

"I still love you, but you hurt me, Tasha. I understand you got scared, but if you really loved me you would've told me. You should've explained your feelings and worries to me. We could've gotten through that together." You hated seeing her cry, more so being the reason she's crying. But you needed to tell her this, you both needed it to move on.

"I'm sorry. Does that mean we— you don't want me back anymore?" She asked in a voice so quiet you could barely hear it.

I realize that I'm much too late

And you deserve someone better

Your smile broke all her hopes. She started sobbing quietly, something she's never done before. She's a silent crier, so hearing her sob hurts you way more than you expected. You immediately pulled her into a hug, confusing her but her mind was too foggy to even question it. Her arms instinctively went around your neck as she buried her face into the crook of your neck.

Save your tears for another day

"Of course I want you back, silly. I'm just saying that we need to work to get back to where we were before. I won't ever let you go again, Natasha, so please don't let go either." You whispered into her ear. Every part of Natasha came back to life the moment those words left your lips.

You felt her hug you tighter. You continued to whisper comforting words to calm her down, as she whispered promises to you as well.

"You are the only sure thing in a world filled with a thousand doubts, Natalia. Please don't walk away again." You murmured, feeling her nodding her head hastily.

"Never again, my love. You're the only thing that keeps me sane. I love you." She pulled away from the hug to cup your cheeks and close the gap between your lips.

That's when you knew, you're never going to see her in the arms of anyone besides yourself, ever again.

Save your tears for another day (ah)

note :

surprise ! the original ending was that bucky and natasha ended up together cause y/n didn't want to take natasha back. buuuut i didn't wanna hurt myself that much while writing it so yeah, u guys get this. enjoyyyy!

taglist (i won't do taglists but i will be doing it for fics w/ diff parts) : @taliiiaasteria @itstashaswife @username23345 @wandanatlov3r @esposadejoyhuerta @marvelwomen-simp @artm99 @d3adp00ls @freewaysigns-underpasses @unique0003 @inlovewithalcinadimitrescu @spid3rfan @ellieromanov @mikookaaaaaao @miky40s @ncsdlr @unknownfanfic @pipsipey17 @tarathia @kyky-maximoff @graceher07 (i didn't know if the people who asked for pt2 wanted to get tagged so if u didn't, i'm so sorrryyyyy)

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha x reader #natasha romanov #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x gender neutral reader #natasha romanoff x female #bucky barnes #gay gay gay #ely !! ★#by ely !! ★#avengers x reader #Spotify

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natsgrave · 6 months

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PICK UP LINES | natasha romanoff

a/n: this is my first time posting and using tumblr, so i don't really know how this shit work, lol. also, i'm not good with summaries and english is not my first language, forgive me. i do not give permission for my work to be copied or translated on other sites. plagiarism is a crime!! masterlist

Y/N'S POV I was looking at Natasha while she's talking to Bruce seriously, I was wondering if should I do the thing that I saw earlier. A couple exchanging some corny pick up lines. I've been hiding my feelings for her for like a year or two now. Well, what can I say? I'm not really a vocal person and she's very hard to approach.

A cold-hearted ex-assassin spy, how am I supposed to tell her that I'm in love with her? It's hard! She's hard to read and I don't want to ruin what we have now, I don't want her to be uncomfortable and feel weird around me after I confess. Why is it just so impossible?

"Y/LN!!" someone shouted snapping out from my thoughts. I look around and saw Bucky standing at the corner. He made his way towards me and sat down before flashing me a smile.

"What can I do for you, Buck?" I asked.

"Why are you looking at Nat?" He asked with a smirk, and I can feel my face turns red. I'm blushing, oh my god!

"I'm not." I lied as I cleared my throat. He puts his hand on mine and smiled at me genuinely, "It's okay, I'll support you with anything and I'll suggest go get your girl." He said and poke my side making me giggle.

"Bucky stop! It tickles!" I said between laughter but he didn't stop.

While you and Bucky are having your fun, your laughter and giggles caught Natasha's attention. Her heart tightened when she saw you with Bucky, happy. Not that she doesn't want you to be happy, but she want it to be her. She wants to make you happy and give you everything. But she didn't know that you and him are just friends, and to be honest she's the one you're in love with.

"Okay, Bucky! Stop, please, I can't take it anymore!" and finally, he stopped while I start to catch my breathe. I wiped the tear that came out from my eyes because of laughter. Bucky pulled me into a warm embrace and whisper to me, "Go, tell her that you love her before it's too late." He encouraged me before pulling away. I smiled at him and nod. He mess with my hair a little before walking away.

Shortly after Bucky left, I look over where Nat and Bruce are and found Natasha already staring at me. When our eyes met, she turned away quickly and walks out causing me to tilt my head because of confusion. What happened to her? I shrugged my shoulder and start thinking about something to confess my love for her with positive things on my head to boast my confidence.

The night comes, and all of us gathered in the lounge. I was sitting on Bucky's right side while Steve is on the other side of him. Natasha is sitting beside Bruce, talking again about only god knows what. Wanda is with Vision cooking something, while Tony and Clint are just messing around.

I keep stealing glances at Natasha and I'm glad she haven't noticed it yet. But, unlucky me, Bucky notice what I'm doing and nudges my shoulder.

"What the hell are you doing? Talk to her!" He whisper shout.

"You know it's not that easy, right?" I whispered back and he rolled his eyes to me before looking at Natasha. I grab my drink before hearing Bucky cleared his throat making me look at him, confused.

"Hey, Nat." He calls out. Natasha instantly dropped his conversation with Bruce and look at him, "Why?" She asked. I took a sip from my drink while waiting for his response. "Y/N wants to talk to you." He said hiding his smirk while I choke out from my drink. I gave him a look and he just smirked at me, "What the hell, Buck!?" I whispered and slap his arm, not the metal one because I'm not stupid. He just shrugged and lean back to the couch before I turn my gaze over to Natasha and found her eyeing me already causing me to blush and a smirk forms into her lips. SHE DIDN'T EVEN TRIED TO HIDE IT!

"What do you want, Y/N?" She asked with her raspy voice and I swear to god, her voice is enough to kill me. Clearing my throat, I asked and pointed outside, "Can we talk in private, please?" She nods and start to walk outside with me following her behind but before that I look at Bucky and he mouthed a "welcome." I rolled my eyes and give him a finger.

Once we're outside I felt myself getting nervous every passing second and my palm starting to sweat. She turned around and looks at me, "What is it, Y/N?" I took a deep breath and think about what I'm going to do, having second thoughts. Should I really do this? This is going to be so embarrassing and will probably ruin our friendship!

"Y/N?" She speaks again.

"I just wanted to ask if you're a bank loan?" Natasha's eyebrows furrowed as her eyes looked at me confused, "What?" she asked.

"Because you got my interest." I finished before mentally cursing myself for the stupid and corny pick up line that I spill.

"What are you doing?" She asked hiding her smile.

"I'm trying to be sweet, just give me a sec." I said lifting my pointy finger and think about something else. She kept silent waiting for me to embarrassed myself even more.

"Are you a time traveler? Because I see you in my future." Once again, myself received a mentally cursed from me. Natasha let out a giggle which she tried to cover with cough. I smiled to myself knowing I'm doing good even though I'm embarrassing myself in front of the that girl I like.

"Your hands look heavy, can I hold it for you?" I blurt out and this time with confidence. She shakes her head and smiles, "Why are you doing this exactly?"

"I, uhm— I like you, Nat. Actually, no, scratch that. I love you, Nat. I don't know when and how but one day, I just woke up and suddenly felt this, I've been in love with you for a year now, and I'm not expecting you to like me back. I just want you to know what I feel because everyday, it's getting hard to hide it anymore. I don't know if you're with Bruce because of how close you two are but please, after this don't ignore me, distance yourself from me or feel weird around me. Even you don't feel the same, I still want to be your friend. It's fine by me." I rumble and catch my breathe. She looks at me searching my eyes if I'm telling the truth.

Once she's satisfied she flashed me a genuine smile and walks closely to me before taking my hand, not breaking the eye contact.

"Your lips look lonely would they like to meet mine?" She said and smirked at me.

I feel my face start to heat up, and turning into a crimson red.

"Th-That was nice." I said and nervously chuckled.

"You look so cute when you're nervous, but, I'm serious." She softy said and flashing me another smile. My eyes widen and pointed myself, "You like me too?" I asked with a shocked tone still pointing at myself. She nods and pulled my neck as our lips locked.

Her soft and sweet lips, I grab her waist to pull her closer to me. She wrapped her hands around my neck and pulled away, resting our foreheads together.

"I love you too, Y/N." She confessed causing a smile to form into my face and hugs her tight which she gladly returned.

"You don't know how much this meant to me, Nat. I'm so happy." I mumbled, feeling her giggles.

"I am too, I thought you and Bucky are together because you guys are so close."

"I can say the same with you and Bruce." I replied not pulling away from the hug and walks impossibly close to her.

"You can't get any closer, baby." She chuckled.

I cupped her face and pecked her lips, "Why is your pick up lines are so good and sound so descent, while mine sounds so cringe and corny?" I asked teasingly. She poked my nose before cupping my cheeks, "It's actually sweet, I like it and I love you." She smiled. "Let's go back inside, I think they're looking for us already." I said and starts pulling her back inside. Before we can enter, she stops at the door and turned me around before kissing me. When she pulled away, she smiled at me cheekily which received a giggle from me. We walked back hand in hand causing everyone to notice us.

They gaze goes from us going down to our hands. Bucky let out a very loud cheer, screaming "yes" over and over again all the while Wanda gasp, and smiles form into others faces. I look at Natasha and she did the same.

"I love you, Natasha Romanoff."

"I love you too, Y/N Y/LN."

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0blobthefish0 · 5 months

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Masterlist

Welcome to my main masterlist - here you will find links to all the fics I have written - this will update with every new upload :D

Requesting Info - here

Natasha Romanoff

Bucky Barnes

Carol Danvers

Maria Hill

Darcy Lewis

Kate Bishop

Addison Montgomery

Amelia Shepherd

Arizona Robbins + Callie Torres

Sirius Black

Bellatrix Lestrange

Severus Snape

Narcissa Malfoy

Sweet Torture - smut | mdni | narcissa enjoys someone she can have fun with

Johanna Mason (The Hunger Games)

Leighton Murray (The Sex Lives of College Girls)

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nimitrix · 6 months

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Avengers Halloween party 🎃 🎉

Award for Best dressed wingmen in the universe goes to…

I love how all of them turned out ✨🫡

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justmymindandstuff · 2 months

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Right in front of you - Bucky Barnes x Reader (AU)

Summary: Natasha's new boyfriend doesn't like the fact that she and her ex Bucky are still good friends. So Natasha lies and drags you into a fake relationship with your best friend. What could possibly go wrong?

words: 16.189

warngins: drinking, make- out, a bit angst?, talk about suicide (briefly, not explicitly), swearing / language// ( I think thats all, correct me if I am wrong)

A/N: fake dating trope, Miscommunication, fluff, best friends to lovers// Avengers as a chaotic group of friends// AU// English is not my first language// no beta// Gif not mine// AO3.

Relationships: Bucky x Y/N // Natasha x Bucky (previously; mention)// Natasha x Bruce (previously; mention)// Natasha x Y/N (platonic) // Tony Stark x Y/N (platonic)

I had this in my drafts since 2022, but totally forget about it. Last weekend I rewatch tfatws (Yes, the whole season I have no self-control) and god sebastian stand is one of the most handsome man alive. I revised this draft and added about 10K words. This wasn't originally planned. Sooo anyways have fun with this :) Love to all of you ❤️.

You sit on Natasha´s comfortable couch and take a sip of your coffee. Your best friend called you in the morning and asks for this catch up and said she had a level 9 Problem. So you have been sitting here for almost 2 hours. You and Nat hand already exchanged all the important news form the last few weeks, but Natasha hadn´t yet said whats her level 9 problem is. "So why did you want to talk with me so badly Nat? We have talked about everything now." you say.

Natasha sights."I messed up."

"What happend?" you ask now worried.

"It is about Rick."

Her new boyfriend. He´s a pretty nice guy, from what Nat said. But you haven´t meet him yet. Natasha dates him for 3 month now.

"What did you do?" you asks. Since are when you have to pull every word out of her nose? Nat hesitates for a moment and takes a sip from her coffee.

"Okay. Please listen to me. I know I messed up but I have a plan. And for this plan I need your help."

"I will listen."

"So, Rick and I, we talked about our friends last week and you know we had already talked about our exes. And now he knows that I am still firends with Bucky. But Rick doesn´t think it is cool that I am still friends with him." she stopps and you look confused. You don´t see a Level 9 Problem with this. Natascha and Bucky were together for a few months and that was almost 3 years ago. So why is it a problem?"Y/N I am so sorry. It was a dump idear but it was the frist thing that comes to my mind. And I was pressed for time."

"Natasha! What did you do?" you ask again, now a bit annoyed.

"I told Rick you and Bucky are together."

"You did what?" you ask shocked and a little angry. Is she serious?

"I am so sorry. But besides Bucky, you are the only single in our group. And after that Rick was fine with Bucky as my friend."

"Natasha! What a stupid idear. And what´s your plan now? We all meet Rick this weekend."

"I know, I know. I already texted Bucky, but he is still at work, he says he will call me later."

"And what do you want me to do?"

"Lie for me? Please Y/N." she looks desperately at you. As if you could refuse her something when she looked at you like that. You shigh and in her look you can see that she knows she won.

"Fine. If Bucky is okay with it, I will pretend to be his girlfriend. But Nat, for how long do you think we can lie to him?"

"Not for long, just a few weeks. And than you and Bucky can pretend that you have broken up and remain friends. So Rick can see that Bucky can be just friends with his ex- girlfriends and everything will be fine." She smiles and you sigh again. What could go wrong? Except from everything.

"Fine! But I don´t like this plan."

"I know. And I am sorry."

"Its okay."

You enter your apartment and close the door behind you. You are not sure if Natashas plan will work. But you are her friend, so you will help her, no matter what. Your phone rings, you fummel it out of your Pocket. Bucky. You answer the call.

"Hey Bucks what up?"

Bucky came as Natashas Boyfriend in your friendgroup, but after a few weeks he was friends with all of you, and after he and Nat broke up, they reminds friends and Bucky stays with your group. You are glade he did, you really like him. In the last years, he became your best friend. He even integrated Steve and Peggy into your circle of friends.

"Hey Y/N. How are you? Have you talked with Nat?"

"I´m fine. Yes I have. What do you think about her plan?"

"It´s stupid." he laughs. "But I said I will go with it, if its okay with you."

"I said I will help her."

"Good. Just wanted to make sure you are okay with it."

"If it helps her, of course I'll do it."

"You are a good friend. Then we will see us on Friday. Do you want me to pick you up?"

"Why?" you asks.

"Because we have to preatend we are a coupel." he says as if it were logical. And as if that were normal.

"Right." you start laughing. "It will never work."

"No probally not. But lets give our best to not mess it up for Nat."

"We can try. So you pick me up at 8?"

"I will be at your place."

"Thank you Bucky. See you at Friday."

"See you Friday Doll."

You hate this nickname, but he never listened to you when you said he should stop calling you that. After two years you gave up.

Friday is coming sooner than you thought. You've been stressed all week about your work, next week you have to present your new project, but you're still missing some figures from the last quarter, of course the department is lagging behind. So you had to work overtime. On the way home, your mother called you. Your grandma had another argument with her neighbors. Probably something about the garden fence. You couldn't care less. The argument has been going on for years, but your grandma is just stubborn. And she's driving your mother crazy. It took you hours to calm her down and when you finally hang up it's almost seven o'clock. And you haven't eaten anything since your lunch salad. Damn. You're going to your favorite bar tonight, but you can't go out on an empty stomach. You can't tolerate alcohol anyway, and on an empty stomach the evening would probably end over the toilet bowl before midnight. You open your fridge and sigh. Of course you forgot to go grocery shopping. You reach for your phone and dial Bucky’s number.

"Hello Doll." he answers in a good mood. "Everythin alright?

"Yes. Can you come a bit earlier and bring something to eat on the way? I forgot to shop grocerys and haven't eaten anything properly yet."

"Sure I'll do it. We don't want to repeat St. Patrick." he laughs. You grimace at the memory of the evening in which you dumped the contents of your stomach into the Hudson. "Not funny Bucks."

"Maybe not for you. I had a lot of fun making sure you didn't take an involuntary swim and end up as a corpse in the water." you hear him laugh through the phone and roll your eyes. You would like to respond with an embarrassing story from Bucky, but the man can drink like no one else. Sometimes you think he's immune to alcohol. “Is chinese okay?”

"Yes perfect. Please bring.."

"Spring rolls. Yes, I know, doll."

“Lifesaver I Venmo you the money.”

"Absolutely no way!"

"Bucky." you start, you hate it when he invites you out, but Bucky throws his money around like it's nothing. Because it's probably nothing for him. Bucky makes a lot of money with his firm.

"Don't argue. I'm your boyfriend, remember." he laughs. Oh yeah, Natasha's stupid plan.

"I actually forgot." you laugh now.

"My heart just broke." You roll your eyes, but then laugh. As if any woman could ever break James Barnes' heart.

"I'm on my way now, I'll be there quarter past." Your gaze goes to the clock. You've got half an hour, damn it.

"Okay, I still have to get ready. I will be quick."

"See you soon."

"See you soon." You hang up, quickly put your cell phone on the charging cable and sprint into the shower. You also have to wash your hair, you're really not on schedule this week. Bucky only needs 20 minutes, so you open the door for him still in a towel and with your hair half-dried. At least your Make Up is already done.

"What a sight." he laughs and lets his gaze slide over your barely covered body. You feel yourself blushing, even if there's no reason for it. Bucky has already seen you in your underwear, so the towel covers more.

"Charming." You say and let him into your apartment. He throws his keys and wallet into the small bowl next to your door and puts the take away bag on the kitchen counter.

"You know me. Go get ready, we don´t have much time. Since when have you been so late?"

You love punctuality. You think it's rude and disrespectful to make people wait for you, but this week seems to be cursed. You go back to the bedroom to get dressed.

"I've been behind time all week. Work is totally exhausting me. I have to present next week but of course nothing works out the way I want it to." You call loudly from your bedroom so Bucky can hear you as you rummage through your clothes. Of course you had also forgotten to check with Wanda and Natascha what exactly the dress code was for the evening. "Do you know what Nat or Wanda wear?"

"Of course not?"

"Crap."

"You look good in anything, so just wear somthing." he calls from the living room.

"Liar"

"Never Doll."

You pull your black dress out of your closet. It's just the right length to not be slutty. Quickly, but carefully so you not smear your make-up, you slip into the dress. You let your hair fall loosely over your shoulder, but quickly blow-dry it so that you don't look like you've plugged into a socket. You take a quick look at yourself in the mirror, yes, that would work. "How cold is it ?"

"It's summer, so not at all."

"So no tights?"

"No, no tights. Another question I've never asked myself before."

"You're a man, pants and shirt and you're dressed for any occasion." you come out of your bedroom. Bucky is sitting in your kitchen, he has put the food on a plate and has put cutlery out for you and a glass of water next to it. "You are my hero." You say, plopping down in the seat across from him.

"I know." You look at the clock, you actually have to leave in five minutes so as not to be late. You're narrowing your eyes, damn it.

"Now take a deep breath, relax and eat. Then we'll be a little late, it's not the end of the world. Besides, it's not just us, Vision, Wanda, Tony and Rick are there. Nat won´t be alone."

"Steve isn't coming?"

"Nope, Peggy isn't feeling well." You start eating.

"Still not?" you ask worriedly Peggy hasn't been feeling well for a few weeks, hopefully it's nothing more serious. When you spoke to her on the phone last week she sounded tired and exhausted. Bucky grabs one of your spring rolls and dips it in the sauce, a mischievous smile appearing on his face. "What is?" you ask confused.

"I'm not actually allowed to tell you this." You're immediately curious and lean a little further forward in your chair.

"Tell me."

"But swear you won't tell anyone."

"I swear."

"She is pregnant." Your mouth falls open, you expected everything but not this.

“I didn’t know they were trying.” Steve and Peggy have been together since high school, but neither of them have talked about having children until now.

"They didn't, it was an accident but they wanted to keep it." Steve and Peggy as parents? Funnily enough, you can imagine it. "Steve has been through an emotional rollercoaster in the last few weeks, you can't imagine it Y/N." Bucky laughs.

"And he didn't say anything to anyone?"

"No, only I know and now you. So quiet."

"I promise not to say a word."

"Good. Different topic." Suddenly he becomes serious and Bucky's look almost makes your food stick in your throat. "Nat's plan."

"What about it?"

"We should discuss boundaries."

“Boundaries?” you ask confused. What does he mean now? You actually thought you would go to the bar, introduce yourself as boyfriend and girlfriend and sit next to each other. Why do you need boundaries?

"Well, we want Rick to believe us and I think we should kiss for that. Of course only if it's okay with you." It would be a lie if you never imagined kissing Bucky. After all, he's terribly good-looking, charming, friendly, a perfect gentleman. And even if you're embarrassed and would never admit it one night or two when you were alone, Bucky as a fantasy has served you well. But he is also your best friend, your savior in times of need and your best friend's ex. Fantasy is one thing, but in reality?

"Kissing is okay with me." you say. "It just might get weird."

"Why weird?"

"I don't usually kiss my best friends. You're like a brother to me." A shadow crosses Bucky's blue eyes, but he's smiling.

"If you find the thought of kissing me disgusting..."

"I did not say that!" you say quickly. No woman on this planet would associate the idea of kissing James Bucky Barnes with the word disgusting. You are sure of that! "I just think it's weird. The others are there too." you blush at the thought of kissing Bucky in front of all your friends. What have you gotten yourself into? And all because of Nat.

“Do you want to practice?” he asks and a mischievous grin appears on his face.

"I know how to kiss."

"I'm sure you're very good at kissing. I'm just saying so our first kiss isn't in front of everyone else." That sounds like such a stupid idea that it makes oddly enough sense.

"Then let's practice." You say, putting your fork down.

"Are you ready?" he points to your plate. There's still a little food left, but you're full and it should protect you from an alcohol escapade.

"Yes." Bucky takes your plate and cutlery, stands up and puts everything in the sink. Then he leans against your kitchen counter. You sigh and stand up too. You could say you're doing all this just for Natasha, but somehow the thought of kissing Bucky makes you nervous, but in a pleasant way. You walk over to him and stop right in front of Bucky. He's a bit taller than you, so you lean your head back slightly to look him in the eyes.

"Y/N. If you don't want that, we can just cancel it. Nat would understand." He says, looking you in the eyes.

"Nonsense. It's not that bad."

"Thanks."

"Thats not what I meant."

"I know, I'm just messing with you." he grins at you. Then his gaze goes from your eyes to your lips and back to your eyes. Bucky lifts his hand and places it carefully on your cheek. Then he leans forward. His lips touch yours and you freeze for a second. But then you move your lips against his, your hand automatically laying on his chest. Bucky’s hand moves from your cheek to your neck and he pulls you closer to him. The next moment his tongue slides into your mouth and you press yourself closer to his muscular body. But then you flinch. What are you doing here? You open your eyes and see it straight into Bucky’s. His gaze sweeps over your face as if he’s searching for something. "Too much?"

"No. I was just surprised." you feel your heart thundering in your chest. You feel strange, but not bad. And it wasn't as uncomfortable or weird as you thought. It was nice.

"And weird?"

"Not for me."

"For me either. You are a good kisser."

You hit him on the chest "Jerk."

Bucky laughs. "Come on now. We're late." he then says. You quickly grab your coat, throw your cell phone and wallet into your bag and slip on your high heels. "But I won't carry you home later if your feet hurt." Bucky says as he packs up his things again.

"You're taking me home?"

"Of course. I'm the perfect boyfriend." You roll your eyes. Why does he actually enjoy this lie so much?

"Come now perfect boyfriend." You say, pushing him out of your apartment and closing the door behind you.

Even though you hurry, you're almost 30 minutes late when you get to the front door of the bar. From outside you see your friends already sitting at one of the tables. "Ready for our big show?" Bucky asks you.

"It's a good thing I was at the Theater Club."

"I did not know that." he says surprised.

"Why sould you?" Bucky shrugs. Then he opens the door and gestures for you to go ahead. "Gentleman."

"Always." You enter and as you walk through the half-full bar to the table where your friends are already sitting, Bucky place his hand on the small of your back. When you get to the table you can’t help but smile. You hadn't seen Wanda for at least 2 weeks, Vision even longer than that and apart from a phone call last weekend, you've barely had any contact with Tony. It's unusual for your friend group, but at the moment you're all kind of busy doing something. That's how it is when you grow up.

"Hey guys." you say happily. "I'm so sorry we're late."

"That was 100% my fault." Bucky says.

"Our two lovebirds." Tony says and winks. You ignore him and turn to the only strange face at the table.

"And you must be Rick?"

"Yes, hello, Nice to meet you." he holds out his hand to you.

“I’m Y/N.” You say, shaking his hand. "That's my boyfriend." That sounds strange.

"James." Bucky shakes Rick's hand too, but you can tell by the way his muscles tense that he's shaking it unnecessarily hard, despite his smile. Wanda slides to the side so you and Bucky can sit on the bench next to her. Vision looks between you and Bucky, confused.

"Did I miss som...."

“Rick, I want something to drink, then we can bring something for Bucky and Y/N too.” Natasha says quickly and practically pushes Rick off the bench. You hear the panic in her voice.

“Bring something for me too.” says Tony, downing his half-full beer in just a few sips and then fumbling his credit card with grand gestures out of his pocket to give it to Natasha. Yeah, not strange at all or anything. Rick goes to the bar and before Natascha follows him she gives Wanda a quick, slightly angry look.

"Sorry." she whispers, Natasha disappears after Rick. "I totally forgot to tell you." She then says to Vision. "Bucky and Y/N act like they're together. Because Rick doesn't like the idea of Nat and Bucky being together."

"What?" Vision looks between all of you, confused.

Tony starts laughing. "If you say it out loud it sounds even stupider."

"No shit Sherlock." you say.

"Bucky and Natasha used to date?" Oh poor Vision, sometimes you forget that he hasn't known you that long and that sometimes Wanda doesn't think about all the details. Not because she means anything bad, but because she is simply forgetful.

"Long before your time." Tony says in response to Vision's question

"Three years ago, but only briefly."Bucky says now.

"Then what's Rick's problem?"

"We do not know." you say. "But that's Natascha's thing, she asked us to do it and we're playing along."

“Red flag nonetheless.” says Wanda. Tony nods.

"Please! This is Natasha's first relationship since Bruce. We're meeting Rick for the first time today so please guys be nice. And stop your prejudices and red flags. We don't really know him." You're briefly afraid that the mood will change because you mentioned Bruce, but Tony just rolls his eyes and then agrees with you

"You're right. And we're always nice."

"That's a lie." Wanda says and you join in her laughter. A moment later, Nat and Rick come back to the table. A mojito is placed in front of you and you grin at your best friend.

"Thanks."

"Thank Tony, that was on his card."

"You make me poor."

"You're a billionaire heir." Bucky interjects and takes the beer from Natasha.

"Really?" Rick asks as he sits back down in his seat.

"Ever heard of Stark Industries?"

"The weapons company?" Tony rolls his eyes.

"Former weapons company." and you can tell from his look that Rick has already been written off by him. You kick him under the table. "Be nice." You whisper, gladly that Rick is talking to Vison. Tony rolls his eyes, but then clinks his new beer with everyone, including Rick. You all catch up on what's going on. Your conversation briefly turns to Peggy and her mysterious illness.

"She works in a kindergarten, where you're always catching something." you say quickly. Bucky grins sideways at you. You're already excited to see how your friends will react to Steve and Peggy's baby news. Rick is just talking about his work when you suddenly feel Bucky's hand on your thigh and you flinch.

He leans in slightly and whispers in your ear. "Relax, you're ruining our show." You smile and act like he said something funny, and when he kisses your cheek you don't flinch.

“Y/N, when is your presentation?” Wanda asks, after she is done talking about her and Visons weekendtrip to Jersey.

"Tuesday and Wednesday I'll probably get fired."

"So bad?" Nat asks worriedly.

"No, not quite that bad, but it sucks."

"You're welcome to start at my company on Thursday." says Tony. "I still need a new assistant."

"The worst three years of my life." Natasha says and then lowers her voice to sound more like Tony. "Romanoff cancel my meeting tomorrow I have a hangover. Romanoff I don't want to eat with Musk. Romanoff where is my watch?" everyone except Tony laughs.

"Pepper never complained."

"You were in love with her the whole time, of course you were nicer."

"Exactly." Natasha supports your point.

"You worked for Tony?" Rick asks confused. "I thought you were a lawyer."

"Yes, before I even went to university. And I'm not really a lawyer yet. I'm still at university. Speaking of which, Y/N, you won't believe who called the office." Nat works alongside university in a renowned law firm. Bucky got her the job.

"Who?" you ask confused.

"Your granny."

"No!" Embarrassed, you hide your head between your arms on the table. Bucky laughs next to you and strokes your hair, his warm hand touching the skin on your shoulder and strangely, you get goosebumps at the feather-light touch. You quickly sit up again and his hand goes over your back and rests on your thigh again. "What did she want?" you ask, reaching for your second mojito.

"Sue her neighbor again."

"God I really need to call her tomorrow."

"I already explained to her that that doesn't work." Nat says.

"I'm sorry she's annoying you so much."

"Oh, it's not that annoying. Plus, she sends me Christmas cookies every year, so I'm happy to put up with a little complaining."

The evening continues and at some point it's Bucky and you's turn to get new drinks for everyone. As you walk through the crowded bar you notice the alcohol in your veins. When you get to the bar, you lean against the counter, Bucky puts an arm around you. It's not unusual for him to touch you or hug you, but today he's somehow more affectionate than usual. Not that you mind. You don't know that about him at all, not even with his girlfriends that he has every now and then for a few weeks.

"You're putting on a good show." You say after he orders another round of cocktails and tequila for you. After this you better drink some water.

"Do you think he believes us?"

"Why shouldn't he?"

"I don't know, he looks at me strangely all the time."

"You're also his girlfriend's ex."

"That was three years ago." he rolls his eyes.

"I know, but toxic masculinity. And the way you shook his hand wasn't exactly nice either."

Bucky grins. "I couldn't help it." then he rolls his eyes. "He's looking at us."

"Seriously?" you want to turn around to look, but Bucky quickly puts his hand on your cheek, forcing you to look at him.

"Not so obvious." You giggle at your own stupidity.

"Is he still watching?"

"Yes. Ready for a show?" Before you can ask what he means, he leans forward and his lips are already on yours. You're briefly surprised, but then you return the kiss. His hand moves to your back, resting just a little above your ass as he presses you against him. Maybe it's the alcohol, or the fact that you want to put on a good show for Nat, or the fact that Bucky is really good at kissing, but this time it's you who slip your tongue into his mouth. Bucky grins and your tongues start a little battle that he wins. Your arms fold behind his neck and you press your body closer to him. You feel your heart beating a little faster, probably because of the alcohol and because you're making out in the middle of a crowded bar. You've never done that before. Bucky pushes himself towards you, so you have to back away slightly and now your back is pressed against the bar, but it's not uncomfortable. His hand moves a little lower and is now actually on your butt. His body is completely pressed against yours and your nails are carefully scratching his neck. Your lips move perfectly against each other. He's really damn good at kissing. You break away from each other, breathless. Bucky rests his forehead against yours. "That was hot." You laugh briefly.

“Is he still looking?” Bucky turns his head slightly to the side and his gaze goes over to your table.

"No."

"Good." Nevertheless, neither of you makes any effort to put distance between you. Your shoes put you almost at eye level with him. Bucky grins and then kisses you again, your lips only touching for a brief moment, but this kiss somehow feels much more intimate than your previous make-out session. A smile creeps onto your lips without you being able to prevent it. Definitely due to the alcohol. The bartender brings you your drinks and the tequila shots with lemon and salt on a tablet. Bucky takes the drinks and you take the shots, then you go back to your table.

"And I thought you'd disappear home." Tony greets you with a grin.

"You are just jealous." you say.

"He's not jealous, he's horny. How long has Pepper been with her parents in Florida? 1 week or was it 2?" Bucky says. Tony grimaces.

“18 days,” he then answers.

"Ohh you're counting the days you little puppy."

"Shut up Romanoff and drink more." Tony reaches for the shot glasses and puts one in front of everyone. You clink glasses, lick the salt from your hands and then drink the tequilla. You quickly bite into the lemon and are happy that the tequilla taste is gone.

"The toilets are where?" Rick asks, Natasha had probably told him that you were here often.

"At the bar on the right and down the stairs." Vision replies. Rick nods, stands up and heads in that direction.

Your friends' eyes are immediately on you.

“What was that?” asks Wanda.

“Even I almost believed you.”

“Why do you look so good while making out?” says Tony. Bucky kicks him under the table. "That was a compliment."

“We wanted to be convincing.” you answer, blushing and taking a sip from your mojito. The fact that Bucky's hand is on your bare thigh again and his fingers are drawing small circles doesn't really help to remove the blush from your cheeks.

"You were convincing."

"A little too convincing." Tony wiggles his eyebrows. "

"Where is your fantasy goes now hm?." says Vision. Nat and you grimace.

"I dont want to know it."

"Like I'm some disgusting stalker or something. Your new boyfriend was staring like a creep."

"That's not true." Wanda defends Rick, but you can tell by the look in her eyes that she agrees with Tony.

"He's just worried about Bucky. Because we used to be together. And you're not really nice to him either."

"I hardly spoke to him."

"Exactly. And what was that about James?"

"That's my name?"

"No one calls you that."

"I've known the guy for less than two hours and you came to me and said he thinks I'm shit. Do you really think I'm acting out here like I am best friends with him." The two bitch at each other. You reach for Bucky’s hand to calm him down a bit.

"I didn't say he thinks you're shit. Just our friendship."

Bucky presses his lips together and tilts his head slightly. "That's a bad move on his part."

"He's just insecure."

"It's not my problem if he has complexes." then Bucky bites his lip and you know he almost said something mean.

"It's enough." Vision chimes in. "We're here to get to know him. And so far he's quite nice. A good guy Nat." he says in his diplomatic voice. Does he also talk to his students like that?

"Thank you Vis. Also for being so open with him." her gaze goes back to Bucky.

"I've said enough."

"He comes back. Laughs and acts like I said something funny."

"Everything you say is hilarious Tony."

“I love you too Y/N.”

The evening continues with endless conversations and bad jokes. It doesn't even take 10 minutes and Bucky and Nat have forgotten their little bickering. You drink another shot with the others, but when Tony orders the third round you are out and prefer to continue drinking your cocktail. Bucky doesn't leave your side the whole evening, every now and then he presses a kiss on your lips or cheek and when you lean against his shoulder he immediately puts his arm around you and strokes your shoulder with his fingertips. Why is he so good at playing this fake relationship? But actually it doesn't matter. It feels good somehow. You miss it sometimes, the light touches, brief glances and secret whispers. But after your last relationship ended in heartbreak a little over a year ago, you're staying away from men. Wanda and Vision are the first to say goodbye and after a while Tony also starts to yawn now and then. Nat and Rick have separated themselves from you a bit and are making out in the corner, which makes Bucky roll his eyes.

"I'm leaving before those two eat each other over there." says Tony. You giggle silly. Unfortunately, you completely forgot that you actually wanted to drink water and the alcohol went to your head.

"We should going home too." Bucky then says.

"Hey. Nat, Rick." The two break away from their kiss and look at you. "We are heading home now." says Tony.

"Alright. It was nice to see you." says Natasha. “Y/N can I call you tomorrow morning?”

"Yeah, just call when you're ready."

"It was nice meeting you guys." says Rick.

"Yes, I thought so too, hopefully we see you soon again." you answer.

"Yeah, it was nice." Tony also says and nods at him. Bucky doesn’t say anything but helps you get up. Tony leads the way through the crowded bar towards the exit and Bucky walks behind you, his hand is on your back again as he carefully pushes you after Tony. You notice how your feet are starting to hurt in your shoes and you're glad to be home soon. A look at your phone tells you that it's almost 2 A.M. Oops. You didn't want to stay that long. Outside you breathe in the warm night air.

“Taxi or walk?” Bucky asks you, he has his arm around you again and you lean against him.

"Taxi please my feet are hurting. Tony will you drive with us?"

"You live the other way, dear." laughs Tony.

"That's right. But you know, I only can the subway network, not cars."

"We can drive to my place, that's in the same direction." Bucky suggests.

"Uhh, so you take her home with you. Your relationship goes pretty quickly."

"Shut up ass." Bucky says and hits Tony lightly, but he just laughs.

"Let's be honest. You looking good together."

"But we're not together. Just best friends" You said, laughing at Tony's statement.

"Well bro, that must have hurt."

"Dude. Leave it." you don't see his look, but from Tony's reaction you can tell that Bucky is looking at him more angrily than amused. Tony nods and starts typing on his phone, a few minutes later a taxi pulls up. You get in and Bucky says his address, the driver nods and drives off. It's late or early, depending on how you look at it. But New York never sleeps, so there is still traffic on the streets. Although less than during the day. You shift a little in the seat until you're comfortable and listen to Tony and Bucky's conversation. The ride doesn't take long, and when the taxi stops in front of Bucky's building, you rummage through your bag for your wallet.

"I'll cover it." Bucky says, but this time you remain stubborn.

"No." you take the bill out of your pocket and give it to the driver. Then you say goodbye to Tony, and when Bucky raises his hand for a farewell handshake, you notice that he had his hand on your thigh the whole ride again. Why didn't you notice this before? Did you really drink that much? You shake your head and climb out of the taxi. He probably got so used to it all evening that he didn't even notice. The taxi continues to take Tony home. Bucky takes his key out of his pocket and you go inside. The elevator ride to Bucky's floor is silent, but not unpleasant. A few minutes later you are standing in his apartment. You slip off your shoes and flex your feet.

"You see, you didn't have to carry me home." you say.

"Lucky me." Bucky grins at you and then helps you out of your jacket, his fingers running over your shoulders. "Are you tired?" He asks as he hangs up your jacket for you. You throw your bag under the wardrobe.

"A little bit." you answer. Bucky also takes off his jacket and shoes. Then he comes to you and you lean against him. He takes you in his arms and strokes your hair. You breathe in his familiar scent. "Do you think we convinced him?" you ask quietly.

"I guess. What else could we have done?" Bucky laughs briefly. You shrug your shoulders.

"You were really clingy today." Bucky pushes you away a little to look you in the eyes.

"Too much?"

"No." you say quickly. "No, not at all. I thought it was kind of nice. Just unusual."

"Unusual?"

"Well, I don't know you like this at all."

Bucky shrugs and smiles. "But nice?"

"Yes. I sometimes miss the closeness you have when you're in a relationship. Do you know what I mean?"

"Yes, I know what you mean. I thought it was nice too. You kiss well." You start to laugh and want to pull away from the hug, but Bucky holds you by your waist.

"Don´t." he whispers. Suddenly you become aware of the closeness between the two of you. But you're always close? Why do you suddenly have this tingling sensation under your skin? You feel the alcohol in your veins. You smell the alcohol on his breath. And the next moment his lips are on yours again. You don't know which of you kissed whom. You do not care. This kiss is different, there is no one here that you have to act for. There is no one here for you to practice for. His lips on yours are soft, warm and comfortable. Buck’s hand cups your cheek and his thumb gently strokes your cheek. You put your arms around his neck and press yourself against him. His tongue carefully pushes into your mouth. Alcohol, adrenaline and desire rush through your veins. The kiss quickly intensifies, your tongues battle with each other, Bucky wins. His hand moves from your hip back to your ass and when he grabs it you moan. You never realized how much you missed being touched like that. You break away from each other, breathless. You look into his blue eyes, you don't know what you're looking for, but all you see is desire.

"Doll." his voice sounds rough and dark.

"Bucks." You say and he swallows. You don't want to think, you just want him. So you lean forward again, capturing his lips with yours. Your tongue finds his. Bucky moans softly into the kiss and you swear you've never heard such a hot sound in your life. Your whole body burns with desire for him. The next time you break apart, you don't hesitate. You take his hand and pull him towards his bedroom. You know his apartment as well as yours. You know that behind the door a large bedroom and a neatly made soft bed await you. And that's exactly where you want to go. The bedroom door hasn't fully closed behind you when Bucky quickly threw you onto the bed. You giggle as the mattress bounces slightly, but the next moment Bucky is on top of you and his lips are on yours. You scratch his neck lightly with your nails and he moans softly again. His lips move to your neck and he places kisses there. Immediately you have goosebumps all over you, you tilt your head to the side to give it more space and pray that it doesn't leave any red marks. But you actually don't care. His hand slides under your dress. You push your body towards him.

"Take it off." He says breathlessly in your ear and then kisses your earlobe. You sit up slightly and allow your dress to be pulled over your head. You're lying in front of him in just your underwear, but it doesn't make you uncomfortable. Maybe because you drank too much, maybe because Bucky is your Bucky. "You know you're beautiful." He says, running his hands over your body. You notice the blush rising to your cheeks, but at the same time you want him to keep touching you. You want to feel his hands all over your body. You don't answer him but just kiss him again. This time your hands go under his shirt. You feel the muscles of his back under your fingers. You push the t-shirt higher. Bucky removes his lips from yours and pulls the t-shirt over his head. You have to swallow at the sight of his defined body. You know he's ripped. You've seen him without a shirt countless times, but still. God this man is handsome. Your hands move up his torso, caressing his neck and cheeks. Then you smile and pull him back down to you. His lips automatically find yours for an intense kiss. You feel his body against yours, his weight on top of you and as you wrap your legs around his body you feel his hardness against your core through his jeans and you moan again. This is much better than your imagination. But that's not a fantasy. This is reality. His hands are wandering over your breasts in a very real way. Bucky's hands. Your best friend's hands. Through the lust and the alcohol, a thought suddenly arises. This is your best friend! Your Bucky. You're crossing a line and when that happens you can't go back. Fantasy is one thing but reality is another. You feel panic rising in you and your body tense up. You want to push him away and say stop, but you don't have to. Bucky pulled away from you and looked into your eyes. His eyes are worried over your face.

"Y/N? Are you okay?" he asks worriedly now. You shake your head, your throat is dry and you´re searching for the right words, but your brain is still stuck in a lust-drenched rigidity. Bucky sits up completely, pulling away from you and rubbing his face with both hands. Then he takes a deep breath. You finally manage to speak.

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize for anything."

"We can't Bucky. Oh shit." you pull your legs up to your body, trying to hide your half-naked body from him. Suddenly you feel uncomfortable. You feel tears welling up in your eyes. You're totally confused. Your head can't keep up with your feelings.

"Take it easy. Take a deep breath." His vocie is soft, but worried. You do as he says and then look back at him. You feel guilty and confused. Bucky gets up from the bed, turns to his closet and takes out one of his t-shirts. “Would you like to get dressed?” You nod. He hands you the t-shirt and you pull it over your head. The familiar smell of his detergent and the soft fabric on your skin calm you and you can finally think clearly again.

"I'm sorry." Bucky suddenly says now and you're confused again.

"What?"

"I'm sorry for harassing you. You're drunk and I took advantage of it. I thought you wanted it too."

"I wanted it! Bucky. No! Don't think like that. You didn't take advantage of me. I could say the same thing, you're drunk too." You are silent for a moment.

"Are you all right?" he asks, you can't quite interpret his look, he looks kind of sad, but that doesn't really fit.

"Yes, you?"

"Yes." he tries a smile, but it's a little crooked.

"It might be better if we go to sleep." you suggest. The situation makes you terribly uncomfortable. God, what have you done?

"Yeah, probably. Should I sleep on the couch?"

"Why? Do you want to sleep on the couch?" you've slept next to each other a thousand times. At some point you even developed the habit of cuddling a little before going to sleep.

"No. I just thought in case you needed some distance."

"I never need distance from you. If you want, you can sleep in the bed. Or I can sleep on the couch if you want." It's a strange atmosphere between the two of you, you both want to please the other without either of you really knowing what you want. Bucky sighs, slips out of his jeans and then puts on a fresh t-shirt. Meanwhile, you lie down under the blanket and are careful not to watch him change. Bucky slides into bed next to you.

"Sleep well, doll."

"Sleep well Bucks." Bucky presses the remote control on the nightstand and the light goes off. You lie in the dark and stare at the ceiling. Your thoughts revolve around the whole evening. About your kisses, about the touches. You felt good. You were happy. And it was nice. But that's how you always feel when you're with Bucky. Why is it so different this time? Because you kissed? But that was just for Natasha. That meant nothing. You almost slept with each other. But that's only because you've been making out all evening. Of course, this doesn't leave you unscathed. And you're drunk. You suppress a sigh and close your eyes. Tomorrow everything will be the same as before. Everything will be exactly the same as always! You fall asleep with this thought.

When you wake up, the bed next to you is empty. You turn onto your stomach, bury your face in the pillows and take a deep breath. You don't really feel rested, and one look at the alarm clock on the bedside table tells you why. It's not even 10 A.M. Why is Bucky already awake? You sit up and listen into the apartment, maybe he's taking a shower or something. But instead of the sound of water, you hear quiet voices. Bucky is talking to someone. Steve! You get out of bed faster than you thought you would.

"Bucky, do you really think this is a good idea?" You can hear the two of them talking muffled through the closed door.

"We help Natasha."

"Of course. You're so helpful and not at all selfish." Steve sounds sarcastic. But maybe you're just imagining it, after all you can only hear him faintly through the door. You quickly slip on one of Bucky’s sweaters. It is long enough to reach over your butt so you don't end up only in your underwear in front of Steve and then come out of the bedroom.

"Morning." You say as you step into the kitchen.

"Good morning Doll."

“Good morning Y/N.”

"Morning Steve, what are you doing here?"

"I brought coffee over. My run goes through Buckys street. I didn't know you were here otherwise I would have brought you one too."

"It's fine. Not like Bucks doesn't have a portafilter machine." You turn to the coffee machine and press the button so that the grinder starts grinding the beans.

“You are allowed to touch the holy coffee machine?”

"This is not a coffee machine, this...

"Is an Italian portafilter machine. We know." You and Steve interrupt Bucky at the same time. Bucky sighs but has to suppress a laugh.

"By the way, Tony filmed your smooch yesterday." Steve taps on his phone and the next moment you see you and Bucky making out at the bar. You feel yourself blushing.

"How childish."

"I think we look hot." Bucky says, pushing you by your hip to the sideand, taking the portafilter from your hand to clamp it into the machine and fill it with the freshly ground coffee. You roll your eyes.

"What's Rick like?" Steve then asks to change the subject. Bucky groans and rolls his eyes.

"Annoying."

"Nonsense. He's okay, I think."

"You think?"

"It was one evening and Nat likes him." the next moment your cell phone rings, Natasha. "Creepy." you accept the video call and in the next moment her face appears on your screen. "Good morning Nat." You say, leaning against the kitchen counter while Bucky finishes making your coffee and then fills your cup with oat milk. You know he always buys them especially for you and that makes you smile. God he's just the best.

"Good morning Y/N. I just got home."

"I am not that far yet." you turn the screen once so Nat can see Steve and Bucky, both of them giving her a quick wave. Then you turn the screen over again.

"How surprising." she says without meaning it. " But good I wanted to thank both of you. You really put on a good show yesterday."

“Sure thing, Nat.”

"It wasn't that bad." you kick at Bucky, but he pulls his leg away so you only hit the air.

"You can tell Rick in two weeks that we broke up." you then say back towards the phone.

"About that. He suggested we meet again on Wednesday for dinner. Like a double date." You roll your eyes.

"Nat!"

"I know, but I didn't know how to say no without lying. I don't want to lie to him."

"You should have thought about that beforehand." Steve says now. You give him a dirty look, it's none of his business.

“So Wednesday is fine?” You swipe away from the phone call to look at your calendar, but so far there's nothing scheduled for Wednesday other than work. "For me, yes." Bucky also looks at his cell phone calendar and then nods. "For Bucky too."

"Okay perfect. We were going to this new Italian place around the corner from me."

“That super fancy restaurant?” you ask.

"Yes, exactly." You sigh. Super fancy also means super expensive. A visit there would probably use up your entire going out budget for the month.

"Okay. See you Wednesday then." you say anyway. "Until Wednesday. And thank you again. I really owe you one. Love you."

"Love you. Bye Nat."

"Bye." Bucky and Steve call and than you end the call.

"I invite you, of course." Can Bucky read your mind? You blush slightly, but then nod.

"Thanks."

"Not for that, Doll." You don't actually earn less, but a lot of it goes towards renting your apartment. Natascha lives in one of her parents' apartments, so she doesn't pay rent and her parents also cover her tuition fees. Bucky earns more than you anyway and none of you can come close to Tony. It's not embarrassing that you don't have as much money as your friends, it's just annoying sometimes. You take a sip of your coffee. Buckys machine really is a thousand times better than that old thing in your kitchen.

"So guys. I have to go again. Peggy is waiting at home." Steve pushes his chair back and stands up. "It was nice to see you Y/N. Next time we'll be there again so we can chat longer."

"It was nice to see you too Steve. Love to Peggy."

"I will tell her." He says goodbye to Bucky with their signature handshake and then disappears from the apartment. You're alone with Bucky, you're sober and you suddenly remember your make out session in his bed you had yesterday. Damned. How embarrassing.

"I'm going to take a shower and then be on my way, don't want to bother you any more."

"You don't bother me, Doll. Ever." Bucky says. You try a smile, put down your almost full cup and escape to the bathroom. Maybe you can walk away from this awkward conversation. You're never embarrassed in front of Bucky, he's your best friend. You go through the ups and downs of your life with him, but yesterday. That was different and you don't want to think about it. Damn you were about to fuck him. You briefly go into the bedroom and open the wardrobe. You spend the night here so often that you have your own clothes here, you quickly get some fresh clothes and then disappear to the bathroom. As the hot water flows over your body, you take a deep breath. You try to sort out your thoughts. Everything was good between you right now. It wasn't strange. Everything as always. Or was it just because Steve was there? Should you address the situation yesterday? Or just stay silent and pretend everything is fine? Your mind wanders back to last night, to the feeling of his hands on your body. You quickly shake your head. You really can't use that now. You finish your shower, dry yourself off and change into your fresh clothes. You wrap your hair in a towel and as you step out of the bathroom, Bucky is standing directly in front of you. He was waiting for you.

“I know you Y/N and I know you want to run away, but we need to talk about yesterday.” You swallow. Damned! Were you drunk enough to pretend you didn't remember? No, unfortunately not. "Kitchen. There's breakfast." He says, nodding his head in that direction. You look at the front door, maybe you should just run. You realize how ridiculous this idea is and you admit defeat. You slowly follow him into the kitchen and sit at the table where Bucky has prepared breakfast. You grab a roll and Bucky gives you a fresh coffee. Then he sits down opposite to you. "So yesterday..." he begins, his voice sounds emotionless. You know that voice, that's his working voice. And you know he has a speech prepared. But you don't want to hear it. Everything in you is now reluctant to hear these prepared words. So you interrupt him.

"I think we should just forget about it. We were drunk, made out all night, so it's clear that we're kind of horny." He furrows his eyebrows, you can see that he doesn't like that you interrupted him, but he nods.

"If you want it that way." Now you're confused. You don't like the sentence, something is strange. But you can't quite put your finger on it.

"What do you want?"

Bucky opens his mouth, but he doesn't say anything. He takes a deep breath, looks at his plate and when he looks up again he smiles at you. But you know him too well. That's not his normal smile. It seems forced.

"Let's forget it." he then replies. Even though it was your idea, somewhere deep inside you are hurt. You quickly push the feeling away. You just want it to be like it used to be. It should be like yesterday morning. Before you made out.

"Good." you agree. The rest of breakfast passes in silence. Then you and Bucky clean up the kitchen. Your goodbye is kind of stiff and as you head home you still feel like something isn't right. You would like to call Natasha. She is your best friend. Normally you would call her now and talk to her about every second of last night. But Bucky is her ex-boyfriend. Yes, it was a long time ago. Yes, they're both obviously over it. Still, something inside you is resisting. You don't call her.

You don't hear from Bucky all weekend. That's not normal. But you don't call him either. Did you really ruin your friendship? God, what have you done? You just wanted to help Natasha. You spend the whole Sunday thinking about whether you should call her or not. But you don't. You know that Sundays are completely reserved for her studying and you don't want to disturb her. You're also embarrassed by the situation. Did you handle it wrong? Should you have listened to Bucky's speech? What is he really thinking? For the first time in almost three years, you feel like you don’t know what Bucky is really thinking. You don't feel like doing anything this Sunday. Bored, you lie on your sofa and stare at the switched off television. You tried to watch something, but it didn't interest you. You aren´t hungry all day, so you don´t eat anything ecept an slice of bread. Are you so old that a hangover lasts two days? Well actually you didn't drink enough to even have a hangover. You didn't even have a headache yesterday. You keep reaching for your phone, thinking about calling Bucky. But you don´t. You miss him. It feels like you had an argument. But you don't have. Or? Why can't you just call him? Because you're afraid it's weird. But it's weird already. God. What have you done? On Sunday evening, a few tears roll down your cheek before you fall asleep.

Monday morning comes too quickly and when your alarm goes off you briefly consider if you should call in sick. But that doesn't work. You still have way too much to do. So you get up, get dressed and head to work. You're just slumping into your office chair when your phone beeps. Bucky wrote you a message. Your stomach tightens. What's that supposed to mean? This is your best friend! Pull yourself together. You pick up your phone and open the message. "Call later? Work until 5." "Gladly." You answer, but you don't know what you want to say to him. What does he want? Since when has he been asking for phone calls? Usually he just calls. God you need to talk to someone. But you're so embarrassed by the whole situation. You've long since ruled out talking to Natasha about it. Wanda? No, she wouldn't really have any good advice for you. Wanda has fallen in love with every guy she has kissed so far. She loves the dream of true love. And with Vision she lives out this dream. Peggy? No, she's more Bucky's friend than yours. You sigh as you realize your last option. Tony. You need more friends. Nevertheless, you reach for your cell phone and call him.

"What gives me the honor?" he answers it after a short moment.

“Do you have anything planned during your lunch break?”

"My whole life is a lunch break." You already regret calling him and sigh. Tony must have heard you because his voice suddenly becomes serious. "What's up?"

"I have something to discuss."

"And why not with Nat?"

"Not an option."

"You're making me really curious. So lunch break. I'll pick you up at your office."

"Thanks Tony."

"See you later." After the phone call, you try to concentrate on your work but things are going slowly. You're happy when Tony writes you a message and says he's standing in front of the building. You quickly grab your things and your jacket, say goodbye to your colleagues for your break and go to the elevator. Tony knows well not to come inside your office. People treat you differently once they know you're friends with him. You noticed that clearly at your last job. As you leave the building, Tony is standing in front of you with a to-go box from his favorite Italian restaurant. You walk a little way to the nearby park, sit down at a fountain and start eating.

"So why did you want to talk so badly?" he asks curiously.

"It's because of Bucky."

"What about Bucky?"

"We kissed."

"I know. I filmed it."

"No. I mean after. In his apartment. In his bedroom. Half naked." Tony starts laughing.

“You guys fucked?”

"No! Almost, then we stopped and it's been weird ever since."

"Have you talked about it?"

"Just briefly. He had prepared a speech but I didn't let him finish and then we said let's forget it, everything is as usual. But I haven't heard from him since then, until this morning. He wants to call later."

Tony sighs and thinks a moment. “Did you stop or did he?”

"I. Why?"

"Then it's quite clear. Y/N. If a beautiful woman like you pushed me off the edge of the bed, I would also have a bruised ego."

“You think this is an ego thing?”

"I am very sure." You are relieved. So you haven't lost your friendship with him after all. "He'll probably only need a few days and then everything will be as before. Don't worry so much."

"Easier said than done. You know I'm an overthinker."

"And a people pleaser."

"Thanks." You say, rolling your eyes. Tony winks at you.

"How was it?"

"What?"

"Your almost fuck of course."

"Tony!" You say, slapping his arm.

"What? You wanted my advice and I just want my fair reward."

“Oh, your advice now comes with conditions?”

"Always have."

"And you wonder why no one asks you for advice. Oh yes, that was because of your character." Tony looks at you in shock for a moment and then starts laughing out loud.

"Good one. I'm proud." You rolled your eyes again. "So do I get the spicy details now or not?"

"No."

"It was worth a try." he then laughs.

"I hope everything goes well on the phone call." you then say and chew on your noodles.

"I'm sure. Otherwise, sit down together at the weekend and discuss everything calmly. Making out isn't the end of the world."

"Well we have to have everything sorted out by Wednesday at the latest."

"What's on Wednesday?"

"A fake double date with Nat and Rick."

Tony rolls his eyes. "I can't stand the guy."

"You just don't like him because he's not Bruce."

"That's not true!" Tony's look turns sad and you know he's thinking about his old lab partner. But he was so much more than that. Tony's best friend, Natasha's first love. You shake your head. You don't want to think about what happened to him, neither of you saw it coming. From one day to the next he was gone, and everything was different. You regret saying his name. Tony takes a deep breath.

"This is far too serious for me." You reach for his hand and try an encouraging smile. Tears gather in Tony's eyes, but he quickly blinks them away. "I miss him."

"I miss him too." You say. Tony takes a few deep breaths and then manages to smile again. He removes his hand from yours and claps his hands.

"You have to go back to the office." he then changes the subject.

"Are you sure?" Now you don't want to leave him alone.

"Yeah. I'll be fine. But I want an update tonight, your drama is much better than mine." You roll your eyes slightly, but you're glad that his low mood has been averted.

"You will get it." you say, getting up and throwing the empty food box into the nearest trash.

"Don't worry so much. Everything will be fine. Trust me, I'm a genius."

"But that doesn't mean you can see the future."

"Right, I can't do that yet. But I'm a man, just like James. Give him a little time until he realizes that his ego is getting in his way and everything is as usual." You want to believe him. And why should he be wrong?

"Thanks Tony. That really helped me."

"You´re welcome." He says, smiling genuinely at you. You hug each other goodbye and you head back to the office. After the conversation you can concentrate much better, you even manage to prepare everything for your project presentation. And that without overtime. You come home on time and put on comfortable clothes. You've just sat down on the couch with a cup of coffee when your cell phone rings. Bucky. You quickly answer your cell phone. "Hello."

"Hello." and then you both remain silent. Tears come to your eyes, maybe everything won't be okay after all. You hear Bucky take a deep breath. "I'm sorry. This is weird. It's weird between us." he speaks faster than you are used to from him.

"Yes, it is."

"I didn't want it like that. Never. And I know that in my bedroom was shit and that we didn't talk properly was shit too. I fucked up."

"No. When someone screwed up than it is me. I didn't let you finish on Saturday and left as soon as I could. I know it's only Monday but I miss you Bucks. It's so unusual for me not to talk to you for so long."

"It's unusual for me too. I miss you too." A ring at the front door makes you jump. "Will you open the door for me?" You quickly jump up from the sofa and open the door for him. You're so relieved to see him that you fall straight into his arms. You know that the last time you saw each other was only two days ago and that this dependence on your best friend is neither normal nor healthy, but you don't care about that at this moment. You're just happy to be able to hold him in your arms again. This time it doesn't feel strange, it feels right. You let him into your apartment and he throws keys and wallet into the small bowl on the dresser next to your door. Everything as usually. Then he puts his jacket aside and you sit together on your sofa.

"You wanted to say more to Saturday right?" you finally manage to gather enough courage to face the situation.

"Yeah, I thought about something before Steve came."

“Do you still want to say it now?” Bucky looks at you for a while, he seems to be thinking. Then he begins to speak.

"I wanted to say that I don't want our friendship to be affected by this little make out session. That nothing is as important to me as our friendship." he stops, takes a deep breath and looks around the room. But then his eyes find yours again, his look is serious. "But that's a lie." A hot burning sensation forms in your stomach. What? Before you can say anything, before you can even understand what he said, he's already talking again. "It's a lie Y/N. I've known this for a while. I don't know how many times I've talked to Steve about it. It's probably getting on his nerves terribly. But whatever, that's not the topic right now. I I really wanted to come here and tell you that everything is as usual but I can't. I don't want to. I don't want to keep lying. Shit. Kissing you, holding you in my arms, being allowed to touch you in front of everyone, This is all I've ever wanted. You're all I've ever wanted. I only had this for one evening but I can't go back. I'm driving myself crazy to think that none of this was real on your part. I love you. I love you for so long. I know you don't feel that way but I can't carry on like this. I'm sorry." You sit on your sofa and stare at him in shock. Did he really just say that? Your thoughts start racing. Everything has changed since the weekend and yet everything is somehow the same. You think about how you feel being around Bucky. Nobody makes you feel so comfortable. With him you can be completely you. You enjoy the closeness you have with him. Every hug. Every time you watch a movie together and cuddle. Every time you fall asleep in his arms. You can talk to him about anything. You can talk about the same thing a thousand times and he wouldn't complain. When you're with him you don't have to pretend. He saw you at your lowest points and helped you out. You saw him at his lowest points and built him back up. You always thought he was your soulmate, but platonic. Maybe your relationship isn't as platonic as you thought. You didn't see him for 2 days, thought you had lost him and felt like your whole world had collapsed. Have you ever felt that way about one of your friends? No of course not. You almost laughed at your own stupidity. How could you not realize that you love him? You lean in and place your lips on his. The feeling is so strange and at the same time so familiar. Bucky kisses you for a moment and then pulls away.

"Don't please. Don't do this because you think you have to." he swallows a few times, tears glistening in his eyes.

"I love you." You say. Now it's him who looks at you in shock.

"As your best friend?" he then asks uncertainly. Uncertain. Also a word that you wouldn't have associated with Bucky until today.

"No. I thought so. I thought you were my best friend. But that's not true. You're so much more. I love you Bucky and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't realize it sooner. I'm sorry we had to go through that drama. I'm sorry it took a fucking fake relationship for me to understand that I love you." you laugh and at the same time tears stream down your cheeks. How could you be so stupid? Now it's Bucky who leans in and kisses you. You wrap your arms around him, close your eyes and enjoy the kiss. He starts to laugh in the kiss and you laugh too.

"We're really stupid." He says, stroking your cheek.

"Yes." you take his hand and intertwine your fingers with his. Your whole body is flooded with happiness. “So no more fake relationships?”

"No. No more fake." he kisses you again and then pulls you onto his lap in one quick movement. You put your arms around his neck and hug him.

"I love you." you repeat, how could you ever not say it to him?

"I love you."

Bucky stays with you, but you don´t get any further than the couch. You're too busy making out and laughing at your own stupidity.

"Steve will be happy, now I won't bother him anymore."

"I should probably apologize to him." You say while scratching his neck. Bucky is laying across your couch with his head in your lap. You've been like this thousands of times, but this time it's different. It's much better.

"I could have said something sooner."

"Why didn `t you?"

"I was afraid of losing you. I felt like a schoolboy falling in love for the first time. At first I thought it was just a phase, but it became more and more. When we kissed in the kitchen on Friday, I almost lock you up here and never let you out again." You start laughing and roll your eyes.

"Charming."

"Always." Your phone rings and you both jump. To be honest, you've forgotten that the world outside your apartment still exists. Bucky turns his head to the side to see who is calling you. "Why is Tony calling you so late?" He sits up and looks at you from the side, there is something in his gaze that you don't yet know. Jealousy.

"Why is my friendship with Tony suddenly a problem?" you ask confused, you've never seen him jealous before.

"It´s not " he says quickly. "I was just wondering why he was calling you so late."

"Are you jealous?"

"Yes." he says openly. "I know I shouldn't, but I am."

"You've never been jealous before."

"I was jealous of every man near you. I just didn't let you see it." he confesses to you.

“Then why now?” you ask, you're not mad at him because he's jealous. It flatters you a little to be honest.

"Because you're mine now." he says smiling. You grinned at him, leaned in and kissed him. Your cell phone stops ringing.

"I went on a lunch break today and asked him for advice because of you. I was afraid I would have destroyed our friendship. But he said you only had a scratch ego because I didn´t sleep with you and everything will be back to normal in a few days."

"He was wrong."

"Yes he was. He wants an update from our phone call." You have to laugh at the thought of how everything has changed in just a few hours, everything has become so much better.

"Then call him back." grins Bucky. You pick up your phone from the table and press call back. The next moment Tony's face appears on your phone screen.

“And was I right or was I right?” he asks into the phone without greeting. "Has Mr. Ego recovered?" Before you can answer, Bucky slides into the Screen.

"Mr. Ego?" Tony winces.

"Dude. You know I hate jump scares." You start laughing again. “What are you doing at Y/N’s house so late?” Why does he have to be so nosy? You and Bucky exchange a quick look. And you know you think the same thing. Why lie? Why keep something that feels so beautiful and so right secret?

"I'm spending time with my girlfriend." Bucky replies.

"GIRLFRIEND?" Tony screams into the phone and you hold the phone away. You didn't expect such a sudden outburst of emotions from him.

"Yep." you say. Tony starts laughing uproariously.

"I didn't expect that."

"Always good for a surprise."

"I'm happy for you and I said you look good together. "

"Thanks Tony."

"Then I won't bother you any further."

"We haven't told anyone else yet." You say quickly before Tony tells everyone the news.

"I'm quiet, don't worry, lovebirds."

Tuesday morning you would like to call in sick again, but this time for a different reason. Bucky kisses your cheeks as light as a feather, his beard tickles slightly and his hands stroke your hips under your t-shirt. Or more likely under one of his old t-shirts that you wear to sleep. "I have to get up and take a shower. Otherwise I'll be late." you laugh but kiss him again. You don't want to get up. You would much rather spend the whole day here in bed with him.

"Then be late."

"Then I'll be fired."

"Doesn't matter." his lips find your neck and he kisses you. You bite your lip to keep from moaning. You gather all your self-control and push him away from you.

"I have to work." He grimaces, sighs, and then rolls off of you.

"You're right as always." You quickly climb out of the soft bed before you change your mind and head towards the bathroom. You definitely need a shower after last night. A look at the clock tells you that you have still enough time. Thank god.

"Are you coming?" you call into the bedroom.

"What?"

"Showering." You hear him jump out of bed and the next moment he's in the bathroom with you. His lips on yours again. You start to laugh, but when his hands go under your sleep shorts you moan.

You stand in front of your closet and tilt your head to the side. Then you look back at the picture Natasha sent you of her outfit and back into your closet. You don't quite have the right outfit, so you'll be a little underdressed. You get dressed, do your make-up and your hair. Just as you're done, the doorbell rings. A happy smile spreads across your face and your heart flutters. Bucky. You quickly open the door.

"You look great." You say, he is wearing a dark shirt and pants. But he's rolled up his sleeves and you have to swallow when you look at his muscular underarms. When did you become a horny teenager?

"That's my text Doll." He says and kisses you. "Here for you." he pulls out a bouquet of flowers from behind his back. You beam at him.

"Thanks. That wouldn't have been necessary."

"It's our first real date. Unfortunately we have to spend it with Rick, but still." You hit him on the upper arm. He and Tony could really open a we-hate-rick club. And that even though they don´t really know him. He kisses your cheek. You take the flowers and look for a vase in the kitchen. You fill it with water and place the flowers on the table in the living room so that they get enough light. Then you turn in a circle in front of Bucky so he can see you from all sides.

"And are you going out with me like that?" He grabs your hips and pulls you close.

"I would love to stay here with you like this." You start laughing, biting your bottom lip and looking at him with wide eyes.

"And then?"

"Stop it." he pushes you away from him, laughing. "But something is missing." he then says seriously again. You turn to the mirror and examine your outfit and make-up. Does he not like it? Maybe other shoes? Or another make-up? "I can hear you thinking." you turn back to Bucky, he is standing in front of you with a mischievous grin. "That's missing." He pulls out of his trouser pocket a silver chain set with small sparkling stones.

"Oh Bucks. No. I can't accept that." you say. You don't want him to give you anything. He's already taking you to an overly expensive restaurant today.

"Yes you can." He comes behind you and pushes your hair to the side to put the necklace on you. His hands then stroke your bare shoulders and he presses a kiss to your shoulder blade.

"It is too much."

"It's not. Otherwise, consider it a gift for your promotion." You start laughing.

“I didn’t get promoted.” Your presentation went really well yesterday and your boss put you in charge of the project. Normally you are only responsible for the preparation and then have to hand everything over. This is a great opportunity for you. Of course Bucky was the first person you called afterwards.

“You get more money?”

"Correct."

"And more responsibility?"

"Yes."

"Sounds like a promotion to me."

"But my job title remains the same."

"Formalities." You sigh but smile at him. You are so full of happiness that you can't believe it yourself.

"Thanks Bucky. For the flowers, for the necklace. For you. Just thank you."

"You don't have to thank Y/N. You make me so happy."

"You make me happy." You kiss him and fold your arms behind his neck. Bucky smiles against your lips. Then he breaks away from you.

"Come on now, Doll. Otherwise we'll be late."

"You're right." You say, turning around and reaching for your bag. Bucky slaps your ass lightly in the next moment. You gasp in mock outrage. "Stop it." He clicks his tongue and grins.

"Don't pretend you didn´t like it." You roll your eyes, laugh, and then head for the door. How grown up. You meet Nat and Rick in front of the restaurant, so Bucky came to you with his car, he parked right in front of your apartment and of course he has a parking ticket stuck to the windshield. He takes it off as he walks around the car to open the door for you. You collapse into the comfortable leather seat and Bucky throws the ticket to the others.

"At some point they'll take away your driver's license."

"Nonsense. I pay my traffic tickets diligently." You roll your eyes and he starts the engine. "And even if I do, you can drive me around."

"I don't have a driver's license." You've lived in New York your whole life. So why get a driving license?

"I know." he merges into the traffic and you arrive at the restaurant on time. You reach for the door handle, but Bucky lightly pecks your side. "Wait." He gets out, comes around the car and opens the door for you.

"Gentleman."

"Always. I'm just the perfect boyfriend." He really is. You started to worry if things would be different between you now, but they aren't. He's still your Bucky except he's also your boyfriend. Bucky hands the key to the valet-parking and you look down the street to see where Nat and Rick are. You feel yourself getting nervous. You haven't told Nat about your relationship with Bucky. You've only been together for three days. Still, something like that is actually something you tell her straight away. But he is still her ex-boyfriend. It seems forbidden to you. Your best friend's ex-boyfriend is normally absolutely taboo. You're sure she won't be mad but still. It makes you nervous. Bucky places a hand on your back. "What is it?"

"I didn't tell Nat." He knows exactly what you mean, his eyebrows furrowing.

"Because you're unsure if it'll hold?"

"No!" you say quickly. "No, not at all. It's just you're her ex." Bucky rolls his eyes.

“Hardly worth mentioning.”

"I know, I know. Still, I have no idea why I tink like that. I want to tell her. But I haven't had the chance yet. And now I can´t because Rick is with us. I'll tell her tomorrow."

"Take all the time you need, Doll." he kisses your cheek and smiles. Then you see Natasha and Rick come around the next corner. Your best friend looks stunningly beautiful as always. But her face looks a little tense. She doesn't hold Rick's hand either. The two walk stiffly next to each other. "Looks like a crisis." A mean grin appears on Bucky's face. You hit him lightly in the stomach with your elbow. "Ouch."

"That didn't hurt."

"It could have ."

“But it didn’t.” you suppress a grin.

"I'm sorry you had to wait." Natasha greets you and pulls you into a tight hug. Then she hugs Bucky too while you greet Rick with a smile and a handshake. Bucky just nods at him.

"No problem, we just arrived." you say. You go inside the restaurant and, thanks to your reservation, you are taken straight to a table. Bucky pulls the chair back for you and you grin at him as he sits down next to you. He immediately grabs your hand and you interlace your fingers together. Natasha and Rick sit across from you and the waitress brings the menus. You notice that there are no prices on your menu and you're kind of glad that you don't know how much this costs.

"How was your presentation?" Nat asks.

"Good. Really good. I can lead the project until the end." you answer her, feeling a little proud of yourself.

"That's great Y/N. I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks." Natasha smiles at you, suddenly her eyes go to your neck. Did Bucky leave a hickey? No he didn't. You checked as you put on your dress. The necklace. Nat knows all your jewelry so she knows it's new. But she doesn't say anything. You continue to talk. It's much quieter in the restaurant than in the bar on the weekend, so you get to know Rick a little better. With each of his answers, Bucky seems to likes him less and you also find it a little difficult to find similarities between him and Nat. He has other hobbies, isn't interested in environmental protection like Natasha is, and he is showing off a little too much for your taste. But Natasha must like him, not you. You notice a tense atmosphere between Nat and Rick, but maybe you're just imagining it. Before dessert you excuse yourself to the toilet.

"I'm coming with you." says Natasha. Bucky gives you both a pleading look. You press a kiss to his cheek.

"Be nice." you whisper silently.

"A new necklace?" Natasha asks when you reach the toilets.

"Yes from Bucks."

"He gives you jewelry?" she asks, surprised and confused.

"Yes, because my presentation went so well." She doesn't believe you. Of course not. You don't believe yourself. You desperately want to tell her, but now is neither the right time nor the right place. You both quickly go to the toilets. "What about you and Rick?" you ask as you wash your hands. Nat rolls his eyes.

"So obvious?"

"Yes."

"We argue a bit. But that's normal." She tells herself, you notice that immediately.

"Yes, it is." you still agree with her. You wish her that she can finally be happy again. And arguments in a relationship are normal!

"What do you think of him?"

"He's nice. I've spoken to him a bit more now than I did at the weekend."

“Just nice?”

"Well, yes. Very nice. But it is only important what you think." You go back to your table, from far away you see Bucky and Rick having a staring contest. Bucky doesn't even blink.

"Bucky hates him." Natasha says and sights.

"He doesn't know him."

"And he doesn't try to get to know him." You don't know what to say because she's right so you just sigh. You come back to the table and you immediately reach for Bucky’s hand again. He smiles, but doesn't take his eyes off Rick. How grown up. You feel Natasha kick Bucky under the table. He doesn't flinch, but he looks over at her and smiles.

"Who wants dessert?" he asks without making a face and waves the waiter over. Natasha's eyes cast daggers at him. You bite your cheek to suppress a laugh.

You complete the last half hour of the dinner and as you sit in Bucky's passenger seat you breathe a sigh of relief. Dinner was tiring. Rick is exhausting.

"I'll be honest, I hate him." Bucky says and puts on his turn signal. You sigh.

"He won't become my favorite person." you half agree with him. The car starts moving and you press the button to roll down the window. The warm car air mixes with the even warmer city air and you blow a strand of hair from your forehead. Bucky looks at you and smiles.

"You're beautiful."

"Look at the street." You say, but his compliment gives butterflies in your stomach and makes you blush.

"To me or do you want to go home?" he asks.

"To you." you answer him. "Or do you want an evening alone?"

"I don't know if I'll ever want an evening to myself again when the alternative is an evening with you."

The next afternoon you stand nervously outside Natasha's lecture hall. It's her last one for the day, you know that. You got off work early today, went to university and bought bad coffee for you and Nat at the street stand. You definitely have to tell her today. The necklace made her suspicious, you know that and you want to tell her. Why should you be afraid of her reaction? You know yourself that it is irrational. The doors open and a bunch of students stream outside. You recognize Natasha's red head of hair straight away and start waving. When she sees you she is surprised. You didn't tell her you were coming to pick her up. She comes to you and you hug.

"Hey Y/N. What are you doing here?" she asks as you hand her the coffee, which is probably cold by now.

"Picking you up." You leave the building. Natasha is skeptical, you can tell by her look.

"What's bothering you?" you ask as you make your way towards her apartment.

"What makes you think something is bothering me?" you ask.

"You were a bit strange at dinner and now you're picking me up from university?" You sigh. Why does she know you so well?

"Something happened." Natasha looks at you worried. "On Friday." you don't really know how to start. You can't find the right words. You sigh. There's no point in talking around it. "On Friday night when I was at Bucky's we kissed and almost slept with eachother." Natasha furrows her eyebrows and then starts to laugh.

"God Y/N, you look like you just told me that my grandma died. It's all good. Did you think I was mad? Not because of that. Bucky and I broke up years ago." You're relieved to hear that, but you haven't said everything yet. "If you want to sleep with him then go for it. From what I remember he's really good." Nat puts an arm around your shoulder and grins at you from the side.

"I know." She stumbles in her movement.

"Y/N. Tell me the whole story! Now." she demands. Now you don't know if she's mad or not. Her face reveals nothing. You sigh and tear off the patch.

"We talked about it briefly on Saturday and I said I wanted to forget it. Bucky was weird and we didn't talk at all on Sunday. I wanted to call you but I know you're studying on Sunday and I was so embarrassed and scared that you're mad because he's your ex.."

"If you call him my ex-boyfriend again I'll scream. I'm over it, he's over it. We're friends!" She interrupts and you bite your lip.

"I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you."

"You're always apologizing for something. But you haven't said for what yet."

"Yeah, I know. I... I.... Oh fuck it. Bucky came over on Monday and confessed to me that he loves me and then I realized that I love him too and now we're together. A real couple. A real relationship." you talk so fast that you're gasping for air by the time you finish. Nat just looks at you for a moment. Fear rises within you. Is she angry after all?

"Yes. Oh my God. How could I be so blind. Of course."

"What ?" you are completely confused. Natasha pulls you into a tight hug. She doesn't care that you're standing in the middle of the sidewalk and people are bumping into you and cursing at you.

"I was thinking. How could I not notice. You're both my best friends and I didn't realize you were into each other. I feel stupid."

"Well, I didn't notice it myself." You say, shrugging your shoulders. "I just thought Bucky and I were really good friends." Natasha starts laughing and you join in. "You are not mad?"

"No. Not at all. I'm happy for you. And for him. Really."

"Thanks Nat. I was really scared." Nat tilts his head slightly and sighs.

"I'm always your best friend. No matter what happens." You smile at her. "Come on, we'll be at my place in a moment and then I want to hear every little detail about this love confession. It must have been really good." You laugh briefly and then let her drag you along to her apartment.

Natascha's message comes on Friday afternoon as you are leaving your office and looking forward to a relaxing weekend. You're planning on going to your grandma's with Bucky tomorrow morning. Also because, unlike you, he has a car and you don't have to take the train. And of course because you want to introduce him to your grandma as your new boyfriend. Your mother would be there too. Natasha's message changes your plans. At least when it comes to leaving early. "Girls' night. Today I have vodka and ice cream. Nothing else." You furrow your eyebrows and know that something must have happened. Voda and ice cream is Nat's recipe for broken hearts. You quickly answer her that you will be with her in 2 hours. Then you dial Bucky's number.

"Hey doll."

"Hey Bucks. I have to cancel our DVD night."

"What happened?" he asks, slightly worried.

"Nat demanded a girls' night .An ice cream with vodka problem."

" Sounds serious."

"I don't know yet. Is that okay with you?"

"Of course, totally fine. We've seen each other every evening this week, now it´s Nat's turn. Should I pick you up tomorrow morning and we'll drive straight to your grandma's?"

"Sounds perfect. Thanks Bucky, you're the best."

"I know. Have a nice evening. I love you."

"I love you." The words come so easily from your lips that you wonder how you couldn't have realized that you love him. God you are so stupid. You hang up and head home. There you put on some comfortable clothes, pack a few things and head straight back to Natashas apartment. When you arrive, Peggy opens the door for you. You look at her surprised and pleased.

"You live." you grin and throw your arms around her neck. She laughs and presses herself against you.

"I missed you too."

"Are you feeling better?" you ask and have to suppress a grin because you know exactly why she was “sick” for so long.

"Yes, much better. Thanks." You put your bag down and walk through the long hallway to Nat's living room. She has already pushed the couch aside and laid out blankets and pillows in front of the huge television. Wanda sits on the floor next to Natasha. You greet them both with a hug and then collapse next to them.

"I ordered you a spinach pizza." Peggy says as she sits down next to you.

"Thanks. What happened Nat?" Your best friend wrinkles her nose. She has no make-up on and her eyes are bloodshot. She had cried.

"Rick and I broke up." You and Wanda exchange a quick look after Nats words. Then you turn to her.

"Oh what a shame."

"I'm sorry for that."

"You fit together so well."

"Fucking liars! None of you liked him and Peggy didn't even know him." she starts laughing and then crying. And then both at the same time. You quickly hug her and Wanda and Peggy also wrap her arms around her so it becomes a group hug. Natasha cries for a while and then takes a long sip from her vodka bottle. The smell alone makes you sick. Nat takes a few deep breaths. "Now it's proven Bruce was my last love." she says sadly.

"No! Nat. He was your first love but definitely not your last." you contradict her.

"Yes, exactly." agrees Peggy.

"But then why didn't it work again?"

"Because Rick was an ass?" Wanda suggests. "

"He just wasn't right for you."

"But at some point the right one comes along." Peggy adds.

Natasha looks at all of you and then smiles. "Thanks." She says and then wipes away her tears. "Enough crying about Rick."

"Exactly men are not worth our tears." you say. Nat laughs briefly.

"It doesn't sound honest coming from you. You're in love head over heels."

"Nat!"

Wanda looks at you in surprise, but you know from Peggy's grin that she already knows. Steve is such a gossip girl.

"You have a boyfriend? Since when and who?" Wanda asks.

"Since Monday." you answer, smiling. "Bucky." "

I knew you were too convincing. Best friends never make out like that." she exclaims. You start laughing.

"We're drinking now." Natasha decides and holds up the vodka bottle. Wanda reaches past her for a few glasses and juice. Unlike Nat, none of you like straight vodka. Natasha shares her bottle of vodka with you and when she hands the cup to Peggy you swallow. Oh no. .

"I can't." says Peggy.

"Why not? It's girls' night."

Peggy takes a deep breath. "I'm pregnant."

"WHAT?" shouts Wanda.

"Oh my God."

"How surprising." You say, looking to the side because you can't suppress a grin.

"Are we happy?" Natasha asks uncertainly.

"Yes, we are happy. We are very happy." Peggy replies, laughing. This time it's her who gets a group hug. "And Y/N don't pretend. Bucky has known since day one and I'm sure you've known since day two. You suck at lying." Peggy says after you break away from the hug and lightly pushes you on the shoulder.

"He kept quiet until last week. I swear."

“So just juice for Peggy,” says Natasha and makes her another glass. "We'll toast anyway. To the first love and the last love." You toast and drink. To first love and last love. A nice toast actually.

You sprint out of your office. You're way too late and you hate yourself for it. But you couldn't leave earlier, your project is going well but a few things had to be finished today. You are responsible, so you take personal care. As you walk through the streets you rummage through your pocket for your cell phone. You actually wanted to go home after work, but then you would be even later for the dinner with your friends. You meet in 10 minutes and you are still 30 minutes away from the restaurant. You call Bucky.

"I just left the office." You say breathlessly as he answer the call.

"I thought so, I'm already on my way to the others. Should I come pick you up?"

"No, no. Then you will drive past the restaurant, I'm just a little late. But I'll hurry up."

"Take it easy, Doll. Take a deep breath. Being late isn't the end of the world."

"But it's rude." "

I bet you you'll get there before Tony and because he and Pepper invited us out you'll be on time."

"It doesn´t work like that." you laugh, but your steps slow down a little.

"It works exactly the way we want it to. Now breathe in and out deeply." You do what he says. "Better?"

"Much better. Why are you so perfect?" Bucky laughs quietly.

"I've waited for us for so long. I'm doing my best now." Your heart flutters at his words.

"You're perfect. The perfect boyfriend. I love you."

"I love you too. I'll see you soon, Doll."

"See you soon." Unfortunately, when you arrive at the restaurant, Pepper and Tony are already there. You are the last and the only one still wearing your work clothes. "I'm so sorry guys. I was stuck at work."

"It's okay Y/N. Don't stress. It's nice that you make it." Pepper smiles at you. She only came back two days ago. That's why you're eating together this Thursday. And this time you are complete again since a long time. You hug Pepper.

"Good to see you." You say and greet the others before you sit down next to Bucky and press a kiss on his lips.

"Hey Bucks." you say.

"Hey, Doll. See, I say being late isn't a bad thing."

"Why do you act like you're together when Rick and Nat have broken up?" Vision asks confused and looks between you and Bucky.

"Oh shit, I forgot to tell you." Wanda says, slapping her hand on her forehead. You all start laughing. Yes, maybe everything is different now, but somehow the same.

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