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#mcu x ofc
drstrangefictions · 2 years
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What If...Clint Barton Spoke Up During the Avengers Meeting?
Chapter one
Clint Barton & Original Female Character
Word Count: 1K+
Spoilers: "Loki" Season 1; "What If...?" Season 1; "i don't want to be saved" fanwork book 1
Basic Warnings + Trigger Warnings: brb crying, Frigg living a normal life??? couldn't be. Or could it?
AO3: Link
Master List || Next Chapter
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Frigg sat alone outside of the conference room in the Avengers Tower. She looked over her shoulder and saw a few visible Avengers—Thor was amongst those that she could see. She swallowed hard, being unable to hear what they were discussing about her fate on Midgard. She saw a few Avengers wave their hands as they spoke–mostly Tony and Stephen going back and forth with two Avengers that had their backs to her. She noticed her uncle peer in her direction, but it was hard to tell if he was actually looking at her or at something in her general direction. The redhead (one of the two that had her back to Frigg) peered over her own shoulder and caught the young girl watching the conference. The Avenger quickly looked away from her and leaned toward the Avenger to her left. The Avenger she whispered to looked over his shoulder at Frigg.
Frigg turned away from the conference room and leaned against the glass wall and slowly slide down. Having to sit and wait to hear her undesired fate was a nightmare, it was boring, she would much rather run away and hide from the Avengers and the ants that inhabit this planet—it wasn’t that it was more fun, it was more so that she would be free from what was to come.
The door to the conference room swung open violently and pulled Frigg from her anxious thoughts. She looked up at the individual that stepped out of the room. Tony Peered down at her and walked past her with nothing to say. He held his head high as if he owned the place (and he did). Stephen was the next person to step out of the conference room.
“Don’t take it personally, he doesn’t play well with others.” Was all Stephen could offer her before he followed the bank account of the Avengers to another room.
Slowly, the Avengers filed out of the conference room and to wherever their next destination was. Thor, Natasha, and Clint were the last three to remain in the conference room. She heard Thor’s booming voice explain something to the two other Avengers, however she couldn’t make out what he was explaining to them. She crossed her arms and closed her eyes for what felt like an eternity (in reality it was probably only 15 minutes). The door swung open, and Thor walked past Frigg without giving her a passing glance. Natasha and Clint walked out of the room and stopped in front of her.
“Hey, kiddo.” Clint knelt down and patted her arm. “Did you bring anything here with you when Heimdal dropped you off?” He asked.
She blinked slowly and looked at Clint. It took her a moment to process what he had asked. She slowly shook her head.
Clint nodded. “How about you and Miss Romanoff here go shop around while I make a phone call, okay?”
Frigg furrowed her eyebrows and looked over at Natasha, who offered a small nod. “I’ll go, but I don’t understand what’s going on.” She spoke.
Clint stood up. “We’re going to find you a home.”
“We’re going to use the Stark Industries business credit card to buy everything you ask for.” Natasha said bluntly.
Frigg ran down the stairs. “Mom? Dad? Have either of you seen my headphones?” She hollered.
Laura stepped out of the kitchen while drying her hands with a towel. “I haven’t seen your headphones. Everyone’s outside if you want to go out and ask them.” She motioned to the door. “While you’re out there, tell them that lunch is just about ready.”
Frigg nodded as she walked toward the front door. “Will do!” She pulled the front door open and pushed the screen door. She peered out of the farmhouse and looked around at the open space before her. She stepped out of the house and walked toward the sound of Nathaniel screaming with joy. “Hey! Mom said lunch is almost ready. On an unrelated note, where are my headphones, Lila?”
“Have you checked my room; I may have barrowed them since someone took mine.” Lila said slowly as she focused on the target in front of her and her father. She exhaled slowly and let the string go on her bow, striking the center of the target.
“Bullseye!” Clint cheered quietly.
“I’ll check your room later, I guess. I didn’t want to barge in, that’s rude.” Frigg crossed her arms. “Boundaries and all. You heathens.”
Lila looked behind her and smiled at Frigg. “You get used to being part of the family.”
“If you’re going to fight, get it out before we eat or hold it in until after.” Clint plucked the bow out of Lila’s hand. “You, go grab your brothers; and you, go tell mom we’re just cleaning up.”
Frigg nodded. “You got it.” She spun on her heel and walked toward the front door; she stomped up the stairs and swung the screen door open. She pushed the door in. “They’re coming, they’ve made a mess of the yard and they want to clean it before they come back in.” She walked straight into the kitchen.
“At least they’re cleaning up this time.” Laura laughed to herself. She silently watched Frigg drag herself through the kitchen. “Are you alright?”
Frigg suddenly perked up, as if to erase any idea that she was anything but alright. “Yes, I’m fine. I’m just a naturally gloomy looking individual. It doesn’t help that my skin practically looks ghostly. I’m also so tired, I mean, my bags have bags!” She faced Laura and pulled the skin on her face downward, showcasing her eyebags (and her eyebags’ bags). “The only thing I have going for me is my brown hair, imagine how much gloomier I’d be if I had black hair.”
“Frigg…” Laura’s voice trailed.
“What?” Frigg locked eyes with Laura.
Laura gave her a small smile. “I have three kids of my own, two of them are teenagers. You’ve lived here for three years and have been a part of this family for the same amount of time. You might not be human, but you’re still a teenager. Nothing gets past me.”
Frigg looked away. “I suppose you’ve got me there. Everything gets past dad… or maybe he’s just really good at playing oblivious, I mean, he is a spy, isn’t he?” She looked back up. She rubbed the palm of her hand. “I still feel a bit weird about everything, you know? I know it’s been three years since I’ve been here and part of the family. It’s all just strange.” She furrowed her eyebrows and grabbed the stack of plates and utensils.
Laura watched her with a sad smile. “I understand.”
She slowly walked toward the dining room table. “I have no doubt. And I couldn’t be more grateful, I’d hate to know what my life would be like had I not been taken here.”
“Go wash your hands!” Clint hollered at his three kids as they ran into the house. He walked into the kitchen, passing Frigg. “What’s going on here?” He noted her expression.
“We’re just having a rare moment.” Laura said, saving Frigg.
“One of those bonding dealios.” Frigg added.
Clint pursed his lips. “Dealios?” He furrowed his eyebrows and glanced over at Frigg as he washed his hands. “This isn’t about what I think it is right? It’s not a female talk, is it?”
“What’s so bad about one of those talks?” Frigg raised an eyebrow.
“Everything.” Clint scoffed. “What’s really going on?”
Frigg inhaled and raised her shoulders. “Opening up emotionally and all that. I just feel weird about everything is all. It’s been a few years and I should be over it; shouldn’t I be?” She circled the table and placed a plate down in each spot; she circled the table a second time and placed the utensils down by each plate.
Clint walked toward her and pulled one of the chairs out and sat down. He motioned to the chair next to him. “I don’t know what you’ve seen or what you really went through, but if it’s as bad as you told me, you’re going to feel weird.”
Frigg sat down next to Clint. “I suppose that makes sense. Oh! If you four are done making messes outside, can I con you into playing Eels and Escalators with me?”
“Eels and Escalators?” He glanced at Laura, hoping she knew what Frigg was asking him to play.
“You know what I’m talking about. It was in an episode of Spongebob, the one where they were swearing. I’ve been saying they need to make that into a real game for literal years. Nat bought it for me the last time I was in New York with her. I’ve already built the escalators and read the instructions; all I need are people to play with.” She grabbed his wrist and shook his arm. “I don’t ask to do much with you, so, please?”
“We’ll look at it after we eat.” Clint said, grabbing a baking sheet piled high with nachos from Laura and placing it next to his plate. “The other kids got lost, more for us?” He dished himself up and immediately grabbed Frigg’s plate from in front of her and dished her up too.
Frigg smiled. “Isn’t that a bit mean?”
Clint nodded. “Yes.”
As if on cue, Lila, Cooper, and Nathaniel ran down the stairs and slide into their seats. Laura placed salsa and queso down on the table and returned to the kitchen to grab drinks for everyone. Clint slipped out of his chair and dashed into the kitchen to help Laura with drinks. Nathaniel reached over the table and started plucking nachos from Clint’s plate and giggled about it.
Frigg smiled and tapped the table to get Nathaniel’s attention. Once she had his attention, she held up one finger and dragged it in the air. Nathaniel quickly became mesmerized with her magic—she dished him up without touching anything.
“Thank you, Frigg!” Nathaniel shouted.
“Awh, did Frigg dish you up buddy?” Clint asked, walking back over with drinks for himself, Nathaniel, and Frigg. “I wanted to do that.”
Nathaniel looked away, refusing to respond.
“He was just sooooo hungry. You were depriving him of his food!” Frigg pointed at Clint with a soggy chip. “He was going to die!”
Cooper nodded. “So am I, pass the dish.” He held his hands out for the sheet pan.
Frigg grabbed the pan and handed him the pan. “Drama queen.”
“You would know.” Cooper snorted.
Frigg nodded. “Of course, I would, I live with him.”
“Frigg, I have a question for you.” Clint interrupted the sibling bickering. “Would you be interested in really learning how to use your powers?”
Frigg raised an eyebrow. “I know how to use them.”
Clint looked down and pursed his lips. He glanced back up at her. “I mean to be a part of the new generation of heroes. We’ve been thinking about training kids like you, kids with potential to be the next Avengers.”
“Oh.”
“No discussing work at the table.” Laura reminded them.
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cozmos-artz · 6 months
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he is loki’s safe place <3
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mfshipbracket · 1 year
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vbecker10 · 27 days
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Loki's Silent Sentry (Part 1)
Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 ( Part 6 in progress)
Pairing: Loki x female reader (y/n)
Summary: You are not just a soldier in Asgard's Royal Army, you are Lieutenant Y/L/N, Prince Loki's personal guard, his sentry and you are not supposed to fall in love with him. If you followed your training properly, you should never have even spoken to him. As a sentry, you are expected to remain silent and invisible as you shadow your appointed member of the royal family or member of the court protectively throughout their daily tasks.
Rumors (that happen to be true) begin to circulate through the palace that you serve the younger prince of Asgard both outside and inside his chambers. There is little you can do once word of your off duty activities spread through every maid, cook, gardener and seamstress in the palace. You soon find even the soldiers in your own company are now questioning how exactly you had come to earn your seemingly quick rise to lieutenant.
As the annual Winter Solstice Ball approaches, you come to the heartbreaking realization that your relationship with Loki must come to an end if you are both to fulfill your duties.
Warnings: Angst, arguing, Thor being an absolute ass, Odin being a terrible father
A/N: I did some googling quickly for military terms and ranks (since I have no previous knowledge of them) as well as some basic information about the royal guards in England. I took some of what I found interesting and then made up most of the rest to fit what I needed for my story so there will be some similarities. Also... I haven't written anything in like a year (maybe longer) so be nice please 💚💚
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You stand at constant attention in silence outside of Prince Loki's private office. You listen to the birds singing through the open window across the hall from where you are posted and wonder how long you could go without making a sound. You have been trained by the Royal Army for years to remain silent, vigilant, always listening and watching your surroundings for anything dangerous or out of the ordinary. You are always on guard, ready to protect Prince Loki should the need arise. Not that someone with his fighting skills or magic would need protection from a simple soldier like you. You were assigned this post purely because it was customary for each member of the royal family to have a sentry, whether they actually need one or not.
Your attention is drawn to the sound of footsteps approaching from your left. You are unable to determine how many people are coming but judging by their pace and heavy boots, they are most likely all soldiers. Commandant Thorn, the soldier in charge of your company, makes his way down the hall at a steady pace. He is followed by your captain, Captain Skye who is holding a leather bound book containing the names of all the sentries and their current posts. Trailing the two older men, are four low ranking soldiers you can't remember the names of.
The group of soldiers comes to a stop in front of you and your fellow guard and you both salute your commanding officers. "Lieutenant Y/L/N," Captain Skye says, opening his book for a moment. He closes it and looks up at you, "Prince Loki will of course be attending the Winter Solstice Ball. You will be required to escort him to the ballroom and remain on guard there until he dismisses you for the evening."
You nod in response, carefully hiding the heavy emotions you have surrounding the upcoming ball. The soldiers move on and you are left alone with the other guard again. She says nothing to you and even if you were allowed to speak, you know Sergeant Sands wouldn't talk to you. She is not your friend, none of the members of the Royal Guard are your friends. It wasn't always this way though, it is only since you were promoted to the rank of lieutenant that the guards you work with began to distance themselves from you.
You had been assigned to Prince Loki for three months when you were promoted from sergeant to lieutenant. Your fellow soldiers immediately assumed the young prince had a hand in it as he did little to hide how he favored you over the other guards who were previously assigned to him. The rumors about you spending the night in Loki's chamber instead of guarding it flowed through the palace soon after. You adamantly denied these rumors and any favoritism from the prince but it was a wasted effort. It also happened that the rumors were true to a point.
The door to Loki's office opens and you stand at attention as the court accountant exits, holding several rolls of paper and mumbling to himself. Sargeant Sands follows him without any orders needed, she is his sentry and will go where he goes. As she walks past by, she glances at you with what can only be described as a look of disgust. You look down at your boots, fully aware of what she is thinking.
You wait quietly for Loki to open the door again but you know him, he will want to read through all of his notes from today before he finalizes his meeting schedule for tomorrow. You have roughly half an hour until he will be done, half an hour to stand here and think about the dreaded Winter Solstice Ball.
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Another half an hour later, as expected, Loki opens the door and walks out. Waving his hand towards the door, he uses his magic to seal the room. He smiles warmly at you and you smile back at him for the first time today. This was your favorite part, the part where the sun goes down and Loki frees you from your constant silence.
He touches your cheek softly and leans in to kiss you. You kiss him back but pull away quickly as you hear footsteps approaching. You step away from Loki and stand at attention as Prince Thor comes around a corner. You keep your eyes straight ahead but you can feel Loki stiffening next to you, he and his brother get along much better when they are at court than they do in private.
The brothers greet each other politely and you silently wish the older prince would simply continue on his way but it doesn't seem likely. Your attention shifts to the window across the hall from you again, you can just barely glimpse the sunset over the tall evergreen trees in the distance. You know Loki will tell you if he and Thor discuss anything interesting so there is no need for you to listen to their conversation. The two of them continue for several long minutes before you realize Thor has said something to you.
"Lieutenant Y/L/N?" Thor says and you shake your head as you shift your focus.
"I'm sorry your highness, I was unaware you were speaking to me," you apologize. He had never spoken to you before and you were unsure why he would start now. Loki folds his arms across his chest and you feel uneasy at how annoyed he seems.
Thor laughs which does nothing to make you feel better. "I was wondering what it was about you that made you my brother's favorite," he says. "You must truly be special, a sentry's post typically only lasts three months, perhaps six at the most. You have been with Loki for how long now?"
You think for a moment before replying. You had been assigned to Loki for only a month before he first spoke to you and you had quickly become close friends. Three months after becoming friends with the prince, you slowly became more until you were completely in love with him.
"Fourteen months," you answer him in as few words as possible.
Thor looks at his younger brother with a smirk, "Fourteen?" Loki remains silent and you can tell his older brother is not even close to letting you leave soon. He turns his attention to you again, "So is it true then?"
"Is what true your highness?" you ask quietly.
"That you follow my brother's orders when you are wearing your armor and when you are not?" he laughs and his sentry smiles then looks towards the ground. "I could use a sentry like that, I grow tired of being followed by these shadows."
Loki's fist clenches but he answers Thor calmly. "Maybe if you learned your sentries name and weren't so insufferable to be around, they would remain at your service for longer than a month at a time," Loki says. "And you are the last person I would expect to listen to palace rumors. According to the most recent ones I've heard, you've slept with nearly half of the kitchen staff this month alone."
Thor smiles, proud of himself. You and Loki realize the stories you had overheard were true, if not understated. He explains, "That is why I assume the rumors of you and your little pet are true as well."
You find yourself in that brief moment wishing Loki would confirm everyone's suspensions. Not necessarily that you were sleeping together, that you were in love and wanted to be together. You know wishing for this is as useful as wishing it would rain gold. Once again you remind yourself that this is the way it will always be, until he marries a woman of high status and you are forgotten.
Instead of responding, Loki turns from his brother and walks down the hall towards the stairwell that leads to the royal family's chambers. You follow him silently, staying a few steps behind as always.
"Come now brother, I was merely joking," Thor calls from behind you but neither of you stop walking.
The two of you continue on in silence until you reach the top of the stairs and Loki's pace slows so he is walking next to you. His hand finds yours, his thumb gently stroking your knuckles. As soon as you feel his touch, you begin to relax.
"I'm sorry about my brother," he says quietly.
"His behavior isn't your fault," you reply. "And he is far from the first person to corner me about our relationship. I am used to denying the truth."
He stops, causing you to turn back towards him, your hand still holding his. He then takes a few small steps, closing the distance between you. Loki touches your cheek gently with his other hand. "I'm sorry Y/N," he tells you again. "I wish we didn't have to hide but you know there are some rules even I cannot break so openly. Maybe I should have hid my favoritism towards you better but I couldn't bear to have you reassigned. You mean too much to me."
You smile, "So I am your favorite sentry?"
He lets out a laugh, "You are my favorite person in the nine realms." You giggle at his answer and his fingers trail down your cheek until his thumb gently runs across your lips. He leans down to kiss you but just as his lips touch yours, you feel your heart jumps in your chest.
You hear several sets of footsteps and separate yourself from Loki in an instant. He looks down the hall as his mother, two of her maids and one guard come into view. She smiles brightly at both of you as she comes closer and you bow to the queen in respect. You find it hard to miss the side eye from her sentry or the whispers shared between her maids. Loki gives his mother a hug and wishes her a goodnight. She tells him to have a goodnight as well and continues on her way.
You and Loki walk off in the opposite direction towards his chambers and once you are alone again, Loki moves to take your hand but you flinch away. He looks hurt by your momentary rejection but he doesn't say anything. He knows how nervous you are about being seen touching him or speaking to him. You round the next corner and are flooded with relief as Loki's door finally comes into view. You fight the urge to smile, holding onto your composure as you've been trained.
Loki opens the door and steps inside, you follow him as you always do and he closes the door. He flicks his wrists towards you without a word and the heavy armor you wear over your clothing instantly settles itself neatly into a large chest. You take a few deep breaths, feeling as if most of the weight you have been carrying leaves you, but not all.
"Thank you your highness," you say out of habit.
"Please, never call me that in here," he reminds you gently. "In here I'm not a prince, I'm just Loki." He walks towards you and you don't realize you are moving away from him until your back hits the door and his body comes flush to yours. One hand settles on your hip while his other hand lifts your chin, causing you to look up at him. He continues, "And you are not Lieutenant Y/L/N, you are Y/N. The woman I am so deeply in love with." He smiles and you can't help but smile back at his words. All your worries vanish the instant his lips meet yours.
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You lay in Loki's arms watching the sunlight fill his room through the sheer curtains. You try to memorize the sound of his slow, steady breathing and the feel of his heart beat against your back as he holds you even in his sleep. You inhale deeply and focus on deciphering every herb and oil Loki uses to keep his hair soft. Closing your eyes, you use your senses to bring an image of Loki's face into your mind and try to hold it there.
"What are you thinking about my love?" he asks in a sleepy voice. You open your eyes and shift closer to him, pulling his arms tighter around your body. "Y/N, what's wrong?" he asks, now much more awake.
You swallow hard, trying to find the words. You had been thinking about what you needed to do most of the night but now that it was time, you weren't sure you would be able to do it.
"I've told you, you can speak freely here," he says softly, urging you gently as always to speak your mind when you were with him. His fingers move slowly up and down your arm as he tries to comfort you without knowing what is causing your distress.
"I need to transfer to a new post," you tell him. You hear him inhale sharply as his fingers suddenly go still.
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You stand outside Loki's office with Thor's new guard and two others in silence waiting for a very long meeting to conclude. You stifle a yawn and shift uncomfortably on your feet before regaining your composure. The tall guard standing across from you rolls his eyes while the woman next to him mumbles something that can only be about you.
It has been two days since you told Loki you wanted to transfer and you hadn't heard anything from your commanding officer. In the meantime, you decided to go back to sleeping in your assigned room at the soldiers quarters. You had forgotten how much you hated it there. The common areas are loud and there is little privacy, everyone is in everyone else's business. You barely leave your room, which is a surprise to no one. They wouldn't speak to you even if you did. You live in a world of utter silence surrounded by never ending noise.
You feel as if you are shattering from the inside out and you try to remind yourself that it needs to be this way. The two of you hid in his chambers as if it protected your relationship but it could never be real. How could it be when he could barely acknowledge your presence when in public. He is a prince and you are a soldier as were your parents, you were not high born. Loki is destined to marry the daughter of a council member and you will guard them and their children.
The door to Loki's office opens, you and the three guards stand at attention. Prince Thor walks out first, followed by two council members. They walk off in different directions, shadowed closely by their sentries but you remain, as always, at Loki's door.
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You stare at the wall in front of you for what feels like eternity. Your mind wanders between your favorite memories from your brief time with Loki and the crushing weight of your current reality. You stand up straighter when you hear the door swing open and Loki steps out.
"Lieutenant Y/L/N," he says, "I need to speak with you."
You nod and follow him into his office, closing the door behind you. You stand motionless, taking in his office and how much it feels like him. The dark wood bookshelves crowded with leather bound books, the chair pulled close to the window so he can see the garden below when drinking his afternoon tea, the green and gold accents on various pieces of furniture.
You sigh to yourself as you follow him to his desk. He takes a seat and you stand across from him with your arms behind your back, waiting for him to speak first.
"Y/N," he says informally but you don't relax. "Your transfer to a new post was not approved."
"Can I ask why your highness?" you keep the formalities as you've been trained.
"The Winter Solstice Ball is in less then a week," he answers as if you could forget. "The Royal Guard seems to be too busy tightening security and preparing for everyone's arrival to complete your paper work at this time."
"Understood, your highness," you say. "I should return to my post." You turn to head back outside of his office.
"Wait," he calls and you freeze just before you reach the door. You hear him get up from his seat and walk around the desk. "Please stay, talk to me Y/N. I miss you so much it hurts."
"I can't," you say almost in a whisper
He touches your arm and you turn to face him, seeing the pain in his eyes. "I miss the way your laughter filled my chambers. I miss hearing you hum to yourself when you think I can't hear you. I miss the sound of your voice and how easy it is to talk to you," he says and you force down a smile and the urge to hold him tightly.
"I can't bear to be without you," he tells you and you want to tell him you can't be apart from him either but you remain silent for fear you'll lose your resolve completely. He strokes your cheek gently and you close your eyes as you lean into his touch. "I love you," he says.
"I love you too," you tell him, seeing a spark of hope light his eyes. You shake your head and take a step away from him, "But I can't do this. I'm sorry." Before he can say anything else you tell him, "It will only hurt more the longer we wait to end this."
"We don't have to end this, now or ever," he insists as he steps towards you. "I promise I will find a way for you to be mine, not just when we are hidden away, but always. You believe me, don't you?"
"I want to," you tell him truthfully. Loki had promised several times to find a way to marry you but you thought it was false hope. "But this isn't a fairytale my prince, we don't always get a happy ending."
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You want to disappear into the marble floor, to be sucked into the wall behind you or simply vanish into thin air but you can't. Instead, you must stand perfectly still and silent as you watch the dancing and merriment around you. You momentarily wish you would go back to a time when you didn't feel an ache in your chest at the mere thought of another woman being in Prince Loki's arms. Shaking your head just slightly, you chase away the thought. As much as this hurts, you will always cherish the limited time you shared with him.
The music changes tempo as the first of seven courses comes to an end. Couples begin to take to the open floor in the center of the ballroom. Prince Thor and Prince Loki make their way to the group of single, eligible women awaiting them, each at a different pace. The older prince seems to now exactly which woman he would like to spend time with first. He offers his arm to her and declares her the most beautiful woman at the ball, causing her to blush and giggle. The younger prince takes his time walking to the crowd and simply takes the hand of the closest woman without so much as glancing at her. His lack of interest does little to dampen her excitement however.
The dozen or so women who were not chosen move away from the dance area and you have to hold back a groan as they gather directly in front of you to wait for a chance with one of the princes. You can't help but listen to them discuss which prince they think is better looking or who they would prefer picked them. The first song ends and the two princes each select another dance partner. Again, Prince Thor takes little time deciding who he wants while Prince Loki simply offers his hand to the first woman he sees. You can practically hear him sigh as she holds his arm and walks quickly to the dance floor.
As the second song begins, one of the women briefly looks at you over her shoulder before motioning towards you to her friends. Your ears go red with embarrassment as she tells them the rumors of your past relationship with Loki just loud enough that she knows you will hear. Of course she gets the ending wrong. She assumes, like everyone else, that the prince grew tired of you and banished you from his bed chambers. You had to admit, it seemed a far more likely story than the truth.
You shift your attention to the ceiling for a moment, hoping that counting the candles in the chandeliers will distract you from their stares and comments. You only count to twenty seven before the sound of a glass shattering draws your gaze back to the guests. A council member laughs loudly, clearly drunk already, as a servant cleans the wine glass from the dance floor.
Your eyes scan the room and easily find Loki at the center of the crowd, a third woman in his arms. Your drawn to his face, studying his features. He smiles at the woman as he twirls her and she giggles but she doesn't know him like you do. She doesn't know that's the smile he uses at court, not the smile he shows you. Showed you, you correct yourself. He glances away, not holding eye contact with her as they move effortlessly across the dance floor.
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After the final course is served, the dance floor fills for the last time and you sigh with relief that the night is almost over. You shift on your feet, looking down for a moment when the chatter of the women in front of you begins again. Why must they stand here to wait, you think to yourself.
The princes once again make their way to their potential dance partners and Thor makes his pick quickly. Loki stands in front of the women for a moment and your eyes lock with his as he looks between them.
"Pardon me," he says politely to the crowd as he moves forward, slipping past the confused women. He makes his way towards you and your breath catches in your throat. He stands in front of you and holds out his hand. You look at him, stunned by his actions. He smiles when you don't move, "Will you dance with me, my love?" Still you remain silent, looking past Loki to see how much attention his actions have drawn. "Don't look at them," he says, touching your cheek softly as you look at him again.
You steady your nerves and place your hand in his. The moment his fingers close around yours, you are surrounded by a light cloud of green, shimmery smoke. When Loki's magic fades, you are wearing a flowing emerald green gown with golden trim, perfectly matching his dress uniform. Your hair has been restyled to hold a small gold tiara with short horns, mirroring the helmet he had worn during his entrance.
"Gods, you look gorgeous in my colors," he says with a wide smile, causing you to blush. "To be fair, you are always beautiful but now it is clear to everyone here that you are mine." You feel as if your heart might burst when he calls you his, he had said it before but only when you were hidden away.
Loki keeps his fingers interlaced with yours as he leads you to the dance floor, straight through the group of now very angry women. Some cross their arms, others give you dirty looks and several make rude comments as you pass. You pause before stepping onto the dance floor, the chatter and stares coming from the guests near you holding you back. He senses your hesitation and leans down to place a kiss gently on your cheek.
Your mind can barely begin to process what is happening as he takes you straight to the middle of the dance floor. He places one hand on your hip and you place your hand on his shoulder as you had done so many times over the last few months. You and Loki shared several secret dances in his chambers and his office, he found it difficult to listen to music sitting still.
He holds you close, his eyes never leaving yours while you dance between the other guests. You focus on how amazing it feels to be back in his arms, ignoring the strange looks and whispers that surround you. He twirls you gracefully and you spin back into him, giggling as you final feel at ease. As the song draws to a close, Loki spins you one final time. When he pulls you back to him, he leans down slightly and your lips meet his.
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You smile up at him, hoping this isn't a dream when you see his mother approaching you. You take a step away from Loki but he keeps his hand on your waist, not letting you go too far. You bow to the queen and she says, "I think it is my turn to dance with my son."
You nod quickly in agreement and Loki let's go of you, his magic fading instantly as your armor reappears. You walk through the crowd with your head down and return to your post, once again wishing you were invisible. The women watch you, gossiping wildly as you pass again. You can only imagine what they are saying but they are not your biggest concern at the moment.
Anxiously, you watch Queen Frigga and her son move across the dance floor. You can't hear what they are saying of course, but you can tell by her expression that there will be consequences for his actions. As the song ends you see your captain approach you and your stomach drops. Loki will not be the only one to be punished for choosing you.
"The king had summoned you to the throne room," he says in a stern voice. You nod in acknowledgement and when you look back towards the dance floor, Loki and his mother are gone.
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I'm almost done with the second part so please let me know if you would like to be tagged! I hope you liked it and if you did, please like, share and comment 💚💚
@soubi001 @michelleleewise @harlequin-hangout @ace-of-gay @xorpsbane @mochie85 @sheris532 @lokiswife-dark-fox-queen @kkdvkyya @animnerd @peaches1958 @peachyjinx @theaudacitytowrite @lokiandbuckysdoll @winterfrostlovetriangle @high-functioning-lokipath @winniewings @pics-and-fanfics @cabingrlandrandomcrap @icytrickster17 @lokisgoodgirl @mischief2sarawr @stupidthoughtsinwriting @mjsthrillernp @holdmytesseract @holymultiplefandomsbatman @lulubelle814 @crimson25 @goblingirlsarah @janineb86 @chantsdemarins
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thelastharbinger · 1 year
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Tenoch Huerta on why the idea that “hard work always reaps its rewards” isn’t true. Talent and hard work alone doesn’t guarantee entry into certain spaces (you’ll always be sidelined even when you’re included), but it will determine your longevity once you force your way in.
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1800jjbarnes · 1 year
Text
𝐎𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐖𝐢𝐝𝐞 | 𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐑𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬
【Synopsis】 : You find out your Super Soldier Boyfriend has a kink that also happens to be right up your ally.
『Word count』 : 300 
Pairing : Beefy!Steve x Reader
[Warnings] : Spitting, bodily fluids, pet names.
Masterlist | Navigation
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How could you possibly even begin to think of such a dirty act? You had simply made a joke upon the matter, never considering the sin-filled fantasy would come to pass. You never even batted an eye that your boyfriend could have such a fetish, yet here you are. Waiting ever so patiently for him to do what he promised. He asked you to sit between his legs while he sat on the couch. You rested your head on his large thigh, feeling his muscles tense when he began to lean forward. His fingers grip your chin, pulling you ever so slowly and softly. His eyes were intensely glued to yours, a sly smirk growing on his sunkissed and tainted skin.
"You ready, Honey?" His lips were so close to yours, yet so far. You were becoming desperate, and the need for his touch grew stronger. You nodded like a ridiculous kid wanting their favourite food.
"Open wide. Tongue out." his voice was deep, husky, barely above a whisper. You followed his orders swiftly, your fingers digging tightly onto his clothed thighs. "What a good baby." His hand that held your chin caressed your cheek sweetly, even though you know there is a sadistic tension behind it.
"My beautiful..." His hand gripped your chin sharply, tugging you upwards. "...Beautiful, baby." And just like that, he spits directly into your mouth, sending a cold shiver down your spine. Like electricity crackled through your veins. You've never felt so turned on, so exhilarated. You needed more. Pulling yourself up, your nails dug into his skin while you chased his lips. He couldn't help but chuckle with sin crawling from his aura. He had you wrapped around his fingers, putty in his hand. And he was going to abuse his power until his last breath.
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sarahowritesostucky · 2 months
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📖"Temporary Custody"
Rating: Explicit
Pairing: Steve x ofc x Bucky; Steve x Bucky
Word Count: 3620
Tags: Dom/sub, bdsm au, dom Bucky, sub reader, hurt/comfort, enemies to lovers, gay sex'n'stuff, straight sex'n'stuff, Steve being a literal Golden Retriever, mental health issues, dub-con, forced submission, referenced childhood abuse and resultant mental health issues, bakery au, m/f/m, gentle domination, total power exchange
Summary: The stigma and shame of being a submissive has kept Mary unfulfilled and in the closet her whole life, until an inciting incident leads to Bucky and Steve taking her in and giving her everything she was always too afraid to ask for.
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Trigger warnings: This story contains themes of eating disordered behavior, body image issues, childhood abuse, self-harm, and alcohol abuse.
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Wait! I haven't read an earlier chapter of this fic! Story Masterpost
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6. Somethin' with Bananas
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Steve
Steve wakes up to Bucky spooning him, pressing his morning wood against his ass. He hums with his eyes still closed, enjoying the feeling. “Mmm, g’morning.”
Hands slide onto his hips. “Mornin’ Sunshine.”
Steve smiles. “Sunshine” is one of Bucky’s favorite pet names for him. Steve is rather fond of it too, after so many years together. His husband has a knack for making him feel special like that. “What’re you doin', Buck?” he warns softly, still smiling because he likes the feeling of being explored, even if they can't take this far right now because of—
“She left for work a while ago,” Bucky murmurs, the answer to a question that Steve hasn’t asked. Alone time doesn’t happen as much as it used to, these days. "Left a bunch of baking stuff out on the counter. There's a note threatening us with mortal peril if we eat any of her bananas."
"Hmm." Steve yawns deeply and wiggles his butt back against his husband's noticeable hardon. "Whas'she makin'?"
"Dunno. Somethin' with bananas." Bucky’s hand slides to the juncture of Steve’s legs. He palms the half hard line of his cock from over his briefs, massaging the bulge as it grows. Steve moans a little and tips his head back to Bucky’s shoulder, a wordless request for kisses. Bucky starts lavishing his neck with attention while his hand continues its slow work.
Steve loves moments like this. Early morning, the sun barely out and the world quiet, the bedroom air still and thick from sleep; easy, instinctual fucking; simple and not complicated, just the two of them loving on each other. He inhales a little sharper when Bucky finally slides his hand under the waistband of his underwear. “Yeah,” he whispers.
“Mmhm.” Bucky kisses his neck. “This what you wanted, Honey?” His hand is wrapped flush around Steve now, skin on skin. He strokes once up and down and gives a squeeze, starts up a slow, tight rhythm.
“Oh.” Steve bites his lip, eyes closed as he just feels what Bucky’s doing to him. “Mm. Mmhm. S’real good.” He shivers when Bucky’s thumb swipes at his cockhead, spreading the wetness around and pressing firm against his slit. “Fuck …”
“Always were a leaker,” Bucky says lowly. “You get so wet, Honey.”
“Buck,” Steve whines. He loves Bucky’s talk in bed but he’s never been able to handle it. It turns him into a pitiful mess, every time.
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Bucky
Bucky just chuckles, knowing the effect he has on him. He’s Dominant. Winding Steve around his little finger comes naturally to him, and Steve can’t say he doesn’t like it. “You were making pretty sounds in your sleep,” Bucky says, murmuring the words in between kisses on Steve’s neck. “Moaning and moving your hips a little.” He demonstrates, pushing his own hips up against Steve’s ass. Steve makes an embarrassed, whimpery sort of noise that goes straight to Bucky’s cock, and he shushes him. “Shh, no. It was hot, Stevie. You were feeling real good in your sleep, huh?”
“Y-yeah.”
“What were you dreaming about?” Bucky presses his thigh forward, between Steve’s legs, crowding him that much closer. “Hm?”
“Her,” Steve says breathily. “I … h-her.”
“Mary?” Bucky grins against the skin of his neck. “Having dirty dreams about our girl, huh?”
Steve moans—whether at Bucky calling her ‘their girl’, or at the way his other hand is now reaching down to cup Steve’s sac, isn’t clear. Bucky gives a gentle squeeze and tug, then rolls the weight of his testicles in his palm. Steve, who’s always been keen on having his balls played with, moans louder and nods against the pillow. “Didn’t mean to,” he says, as if he needs to defend his character.
Bucky grins like a shark and nips his earlobe. “Course not. You just couldn’t help it, could you? She’s always there, moaning around bites of cream filled pastries, showing off her ass in those leggings—”
Steve groans.
“—Giving us attitude every day like she wants a spanking, but dropping so sweet by the end’a the night.” He can see pink spreading around to the back of Steve’s neck and shoulders now. His Stevie colors so easily. Bucky licks delicately along the shell of his ear and whispers, “Tell me. Tell me what you did to her in the dream.” Steve moans and doesn’t answer for a long while, maybe too distracted by Bucky’s hand that’s still stroking him slowly. Bucky stills, opens his hand and presses Steve’s cock up against his stomach. “Steve,” he warns. “Tell me.”
“... Wasn’t me,” Steve mumbles, embarrassed. “It was you. You were touching her, fucking her.”
Bucky’s guts tighten in arousal. “Oh?” he breathes. “You like thinkin’ about that? Like thinking about me laying her out? Her spreading her legs for me right here on this bed?” Steve groans and nods, whining impatiently and humping forward for more. Bucky chuckles and takes him in hand again, squeezing his shaft and fondling his balls. They’re tighter now, drawn up closer to his body as he gets more worked up. “So?” Bucky needles, when he still hasn’t gotten an answer. “Is that what you want?”
“Bucky, nngh, Yes, alright?”
“Mmhm.” He chuckles softly and nuzzles Steve’s neck, enjoying his husband’s flustered state. “But you know, I think I’d like to watch you.” He can just picture it: Steve’s muscled, strong body moving over her soft curves, his big hands holding her open gently—because everything Steve does is gentle—while he makes her cum on his cock. “Yeah. You like that idea, Big guy? Me too. I wanna watch this big fat dick—” he squeezes his fist on Steve— “plowing her sloppy, making her cum so good she even cries a little bit.” Steve whines again, and Bucky hums in agreement. “Mmhm. It’d be so hot, Stevie.”
Steve squirms against him in distress. “I, I’ve never … With girls I mean. I’m not … I’ve never …” he peters off, and Bucky’s got no idea what he’s saying.
“What?” He frowns and ruts his erection against the cleft of Steve’s ass for a little relief. “What’re you talking about, Baby? You’ve been with women before. College?”
Steve shakes his head against the pillow. “No, I mean I … I don’t know what to do. To make ‘em feel good. I’m … not good at it.”
Bucky actually stops what he’s doing. Steve grunts at the lack of touch, but Bucky just hushes him and pulls on his shoulder, urging him to turn over. “Hey. C’mere. Look at me.” Steve’s face is indeed colored pink when he turns to lie facing Bucky. His eyes flick up briefly, but dart away again, shy. Bucky’s heart squeezes. “Oh, Honey,” he says, bringing a hand up to cup Steve’s jaw. “Who told you that?” He thinks of murdering whatever coed bitch might’ve made Steve feel self-conscious.
Steve looks mortified. “Nobody did. Just … I could tell. The times I was with ‘em. I couldn’t make them, you know, cum.” He looks so ashamed as he admits it, and Bucky wants to grab him and kiss all over his entire face.
“Aw, Steve,” he coos. “Is that it? You’re nervous about being with a woman again? Not confident?”
Steve nods. He tucks himself against Bucky’s body and presses his face in his neck, hiding there. “Women are hard,” he mumbles. “I like ‘em, but it’s not easy.”
Bucky chuckles a little. “Yeah, that’s for sure. But it’s not that bad, baby. You just gotta know a few basics. Gotta take it real slow and feel them out, find out what makes her feel good. Every girl’s different. That’s the beauty in it.”
Steve grunts and ruts up against him, their cocks knocking together between their bellies. “Tell me?” he asks, eager and sweet. “Please, Buck? Tell me how.”
Bucky feels like half the blood leaves his brain, his dick throbbing anew. “Fuck,” he breathes, crazy turned on at the idea. “You want me to teach you, Stevie? Teach you how to get her crying? Dripping wet? How to touch her so good you make her cum?”
Steve shivers and nods, grinding his forehead into Bucky’s shoulder in embarrassment. “Yeah, yeah I want you to. Want you to teach me.”
Bucky pulls Steve’s head up to make him look at him. His face is pinched—embarrassed but wanting. Bucky curses. “Fuck. Yeah, yeah baby I’ll teach you how. C’mere.” He moves up the bed, pulling Steve’s meaty shoulders to get him to follow, directing him to sit in his lap, back to chest as Bucky props them up against the headboard. He spreads his legs wide to accommodate Steve’s bulk, wrapping his arms around him from behind. “My little overachiever,” he murmurs. “Such a Boy Scout, always wanting to be the best you can be.”
Steve huffs. “Don’t think they gave out merits for eating pussy,” he quips, uncharacteristically lewd. 
Bucky barks out a laugh in delight. “Well pay attention, Sweetheart. You’re about to earn that badge.” Steve shudders against him, but he’s leaning back against Bucky, slumped just a little lower in his lap. He’s ready to listen, and Bucky’s fucking hot at the chance to tell. “First thing you gotta know,” he says, speaking delicately and smoothing his hands over Steve’s sides. “Is forget what you’ve seen in porn. They make that shit for us, not them. It’s all fake. No better way to make a girl miserable than to go pounding into her or whatever else.”
Steve makes a questioning noise, and God bless him, Bucky knows instantly that this is news to the big dummy. “But …” he hedges.
“No buts, Honey.” Bucky kisses his ear. “You gotta be so gentle. Always start soft, always go slow. Start that way and pay attention to her reactions.” He skims his fingertips up Steve’s ribs, tickling lightly over to his pecs and back down, making him gasp. “Yeah,” Bucky hums, “Just like that. She might be quiet at first, girls don’t moan all loud right off the bat. They don’t get worked up as fast as we do. They take time.”
Steve nods, panting a little as he listens to him. “W-what then?” he asks.
“Listen to her breathing, the sounds she makes. She’ll start breathing heavier when you’ve got her feeling good, start making little sounds without even realizing she’s doin’ it.” Steve looses a tiny whimper and Bucky grins. “Yeah, just like that.” He reaches down and finds Steve’s cock again, and god it’s sexy how wet his fella can get. He strokes him a few times, just languidly, letting the precum guide the slide of his fist. Not hurrying. Showing Steve what he means when he says ‘slow’.
“Oh,” Steve breathes, sounding gone for it.
“Yeah,” Bucky agrees. “And then when she starts moving her hips?” He presses his crotch into the small of Steve’s back. “Just rubbing herself against you or humping up in the air a little? Oh yeah, that’s when she’s into it.” He brings one hand up to cradle Steve’s pec. “Girls are more sensitive here than we are,” he tells him. He’s looking over Steve’s shoulder now, eyeing up what he’s doing. He flicks his thumb over the nipple—so freaking small and petal pink where Bucky’s are darker. And he’s so responsive, the nipple pebbling up with hardly any effort on Bucky’s part. “Mmhm,” Bucky hums approvingly. “You want to try different things. You can just hold ‘em …” he uses both hands and cups the meat of Steve’s chest, giving a proprietary squeeze. Steve moans and Bucky smiles. “Yeah. But not too hard. Treat her tits like they’re something delicate, somethin’ special.” He makes the motion to Steve’s pecs like he would do to lightly bounce a woman’s breasts in his palms. “And Mary, she’s got smaller tits. A nice, healthy handful, just like you.”
Steve whines and squirms impatiently in his lap. Bucky glances down to check, and sees Steve’s cock; abandoned on his stomach, dark, and leaking. It’s so heavy and thick, the foreskin drawn halfway down the head, showcasing the shiny pink tip of him. Bucky curses softly. Fuck, but he wants to wring an orgasm out of that cock like ten minutes ago. But he forces himself to stay the course.
“When you use your mouth on her nipples,” he whispers, voice soft like velvet in Steve’s ear, “You can lick. Or nibble a little.” He mimics each option with a stroke and then a pinch of his fingers on Steve’s nipples, flicking out with his tongue to get the shell of Steve’s ear. “But I’ll tell you what: most of ‘em like it best when you suck.” He uses all five fingertips drawn together to pull gently at the peaks of Steve’s chest, and Steve makes a hurt, wanting sound. “Yeah,” Bucky agrees. “Suck her nipples. Then fit as much of her in your mouth as you can and suck that too.” He takes pity on Steve and reaches back down for his cock. Steve cries out, and Bucky gentles him. “Shh sh sh. Remember: slow.”
Steve groans, his tight hips flexing and pushing his cock up into the curl of Bucky’s fist. “Buck, please.”
“It’s not about you,” Bucky chides. “You’re a man. You get to cum so easy and all the time. You gotta help her get there, give her what she deserves.”
Steve sobs a little, so worked up from all the teasing, but he falls back into Bucky, relaxing against his chest and laying himself open for Bucky to continue. Pride and adoration for his man well up in Bucky at the show of submission. “Good,” he praises, giving an extra indulgent twist on the next upstroke. Steve’s foreskin moves with the motions, making soft, wet noises with all the precum he’s leaking. Bucky hums appreciatively. “Yeah, lookit that.” He draws his hand all the way up, tight, and then dips his thumb into the folds, rubbing into that wetness, against the sensitive head. “If you’re doing it right, touching her enough, she’ll be wet by now,” he says. “But you still shouldn’t go for her pussy yet. Not yet.”
“What … what else?” Steve asks muzzily, like he can’t think of anything else to do that doesn’t involve his dick getting jerked off or sticking it in a hypothetical pussy.
“Tease her,” Bucky says. “Run your hands all over her body, all over her soft skin.”
Steve sighs happily. “I like how soft they are. Smooth.”
Hearing Steve talk about what he likes about women makes Bucky’s dick throb, and he grinds it against Steve’s lower back for some relief. “Mmhm,” he agrees, moving his hands up and down the skin of Steve’s ribcage, his belly, grabbing on at his hips and giving a proprietary jostle. “Dig your fingers into her, gentle but insistent. Let her feel how much you love her body.”
“Now?” Steve asks.
“Not yet,” Bucky whispers.
“Fuck. Bucky.”
“Tease her,” he insists, ignoring Steve’s pleading. He slides his hands down Steve’s thighs and inwards, pulling them apart. Steve moans and spreads them wide. “Exactly,” Bucky says. “You want to touch her here. Run your hands all over, so close to where she wants it. Remember, if you’ve been doing this right, she’ll be wet by now.” He goes back and strokes the wetness along Steve’s shaft. “Sink down between her legs and kiss her thighs—you’ll smell it.”
“Oh my god.”
Bucky smiles, in love with his husband for how easily he comes apart under his care. He traces down to the base of Steve’s cock, making a vee with two fingers and rubbing the skin on either side. “Put pressure on her mound, really close but not touching where she wants it. Not yet.” His other hand slides down and delicately traces the seam of Steve’s sac. “Tease her, trace her folds. Get a little bit of that wetness and rub it around to make her even more sensitive. And then …” He blows gently on Steve’s ear. Steve moans. “Just like that. You want to wait. Don’t give her your mouth until she’s whining and shovin’ up at you for it.”
“Nngh,”
Bucky chuckles and circles the wet pad of his finger over one testicle and then the other. He nudges at Steve’s taut sac and whispers in his ear. “Push her lips apart.”
Steve is breathing hard through his nose, tense, his dick bobbing rock hard and angry in the air. Bucky has mercy on him and reaches for it, and Steve chokes out a sob of relief at only the slightest touch.
Bucky kisses his temple soothingly. “Shh. Here. Riiight here.” He holds the head between his thumb and fingers and starts jacking just the tip of him, foreskin tugging and gliding in that way that he knows feels amazing for Steve. “Right above her sweet spot, see? You rub on her like this, up and down, back and forth. Work the hood over her clit juuust like this.”
Steve makes a debased groan at the echo of what Bucky’s saying, and how he’s working Steve’s foreskin over the head of his dick. “Fuck, fuck,” he hisses.
“Yeah, you’re close. She’s soaked by now. You think it’s time to give her more?”
“Bucky. Yes, yes, please.” His hips are straining upwards but he lets his head loll back on Bucky’s shoulder, open for what he’ll do next. “Please,” he begs.
“Now this is important, baby, so pay attention,” Bucky says. “Some women like a mouth on ‘em down there, some don’t. Some do, but they have a hang up over how they think they look or taste or something.” Steve makes a sad noise at that, matching Bucky’s opinion that: yeah, women shouldn’t worry so much. Pussy is just generally fucking awesome. “Tell her how much you love it,” he says. “The taste of her, the shape of her lips. Make her feel pretty and wanted.” He’s fondling Steve’s balls anew as he says this, rubbing and rolling them, then cupping his whole palm over them and dipping behind to dig fingertips into his taint. “Come on, Stevie,” he goads, “Let me hear it. Tell me what you’d say.”
It takes Steve a few tries before he can pull enough of his brain out of his dick to rasp, “S’fucking gorgeous p-pussy. So … so wet. Can I lick it Honey, huh? Please lemme lick it. Wanna taste that sweet cunt.”
Bucky gasps, shocked and delighted at Steve’s dirty talk. “Oh, Stevie,” he groans. “Baby. Fuck, yes. I didn’t know you had it in you.” He wraps his hand fully around Steve’s cock and starts jerking him off fast, fast enough that it’s obvious he’s finally aiming to make Steve cum, and Steve chokes on a relieved heave of breath. 
"Yes! Oh, thank you!”
Bucky attacks Steve’s neck with his mouth, biting and smearing spit and scraping his teeth over the wet skin. He growls as he watches his fist working furiously over Steve's red, hard dick. “Suck her clit while you fuck her on your fingers,” he rasps. “Tell her she’s a good girl, tell her to ride your face, grind down on your hand. Make sure she knows she’s allowed to let go.”
Steve cries out, guttural and loud like he always gets when his pleasure is cresting. “Bucky, Buck. Honey, oh. F-fuck, m’close.”
“Mmhm. Thaat’s it, Princess,” he says, pitching his voice just so and using that name so that Steve knows. Knows he’s talking to her.
Steve whines, his whole body tight and straining into Bucky’s grip.
“Curl your fucking fingers in her,” Bucky growls. “She’s close. Don’t slow down. Don’t even speed up. She likes what you’re doing now, so don’t you dare fucking change a thing.”
“Bucky!”
“That’s it, Princess, just like that. You’re almost there.”
“Fuck, fuck … ssshit …”
“Ride Daddy’s hand, fuck back on it. Good girl.”
Steve jerks and shouts, cock pulsing in telltale contractions, before searing ropes of come shoot up his stomach and all over Bucky’s hand. “Oh, oh, oh!” He grunts through it with gorgeous sounds, and Bucky’s so in love with the sight of it that he’s not roleplaying anymore when he purrs, “Fucking beautiful, Sweetheart.”
Steve slumps when it’s over, still panting from the pleasure. Bucky eases off, sets his wet and slowly softening dick gently against his stomach. He moves them, guiding Steve to turn over and lie out on his front. He shoves Steve’s legs together and straddles them, swipes his hand that’s covered in Steve’s release into the tight space between his thighs, wetting him up. He growls viciously, pent up and rock hard and ready to fucking cum. He ruts into the wet clench of Steve’s thick thighs, fucking him like he’s got a loose, easy cunt. “Fuck, baby,” he grits, close within a matter of minutes. He chases his orgasm and collapses onto Steve’s broad back when it hits, grinding in hard one last time and shouting loud and guttural with how goddamn good it feels. “Fuck! Ughn, f-ffuuck.” 
He comes down heaving, panting against Steve’s skin. Steve is strong enough that he can roll out from under his weight, and he pulls Bucky into his arms and draws his head onto his chest. Bucky goes gratefully, happy to have Steve’s firm pecs as a pillow. “God, honey,” he breathes, wrung out. Steve makes a noise of agreement. They just lie there together, sweaty and spent, catching their breath for a long time.
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“... Buck?”
“Yeah?”
“… You’re a good teacher.”
Bucky laughs and crawls up to kiss Steve on the mouth. “Yeah,” he says when they part. “But that wasn’t even the main event.” Steve looks confused for a second, before Bucky slyly clarifies: “You still gotta fuck her. And you know you want to make her cum at least twice.”
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lokiusly · 5 months
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Not Tom Hiddleston saying “Lokius” and acting like he’s never heard of the ship name, acting like he’s not the FOUNDER of the Lokius fanclub 💚✨
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chilly
peter quill x f!reader prompt: warmth theme: fluff (tags beneath the cut)
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There were so many things about being on a spaceship that you hadn’t expected, but the one that you found yourself lingering on was the silence. Not while everyone was awake – no, then the ship was filled with the noise of the crew and the music that never ended. But once they were asleep? You thought you’d hear the engines murmur under the metal floors, but no. Just silence.
“What’re you doing up?”
You started at the sound of Quill’s tired voice behind you, and you turned away from the windows to see him standing in the doorway, rubbing at one eye with the heel of his hand. He’d been on the over-night shift, monitoring the ship’s trajectory through space. Days of stubble marred his jawline, his shirt wrinkled.
“Hey,” you replied. “Who’s steering this thing?”
He smiled, jerking his head back the way he’d come. “Rocket just took over. But you do know the ship has auto-pilot, right?”
You smiled softly, tugging your coat further around yourself. “Still getting used to it.”
“So?” he asked, stepping further into the room. “Why’re you up?”
You shrugged a shoulder, turning back to face the forever expanse of darkness and stars outside. “You know, in like, every movie I’ve ever seen about space, they talk about it being cold. You think that would have prepared me for just how… goddamn freezing it is on this thing.”
Peter chuckled quietly. “You get used to it.”
There was a pause, a moment of that silence that hung between the two of you. Then, you heard his footsteps approach you slowly. You jumped slightly as you felt his hand touch your shoulder, his palm smoothing down over your arm.
“I, uh…” he cleared his throat awkwardly.
“Wh—?”
He wrapped his arms around you hesitantly, his hands tracking down your arms to join them where they were wound around your middle. You raised them in surprise, stumbling slightly as he tugged you gently back against his chest. Your hands settled on top of his arms, his skin wonderfully, surprisingly warm beneath your frigid fingers.
“…Oh.”
“Shit, you weren’t kidding about being cold…” he muttered, his hands moving to enclose yours between them. You sighed, watching his fingers curl around yours. Quill cleared his throat again after a moment, as if only now realising the intimacy of the situation. “Better?”
You nodded, leaning back into his embrace. “…I want to make a comment about you being so warm, but I just know you’re going to turn into a ‘hot’ joke.”
“It’s like you know me.”
You giggled quietly, resting your head back on his shoulder. “It really is amazing out here.”
Peter hesitated as your tone turned pensive, and you felt his hands squeeze yours, so gently you weren’t sure you hadn’t imagined it. “You’re not thinkin’ about leavin’ us already, are you?”
You paused a moment before answering. “Sometimes… I think that I should think that I should, y’know?”
“…You lost me.”
You smiled softly, relaxing further into his embrace. “No. I’m not going anywhere, Quill.”
You felt his chin rest on your hair. “Good. We’re kinda getting used to having you around.”
tags: @lovely-dreamer19 @wittyforachange @wefracturedmotivation @january-echoes @glossyloner @capitalnineteen @youclickedthislink @s0ftness @castieltrash1 @drakelover78 @queenoftheunderdark @bombardia @bellarkeselection @nix-rose-q @blue-chup @curcuma-yn0t @ninebluehearts
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boxofbonesfic · 9 months
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Title: Brave [4 of ?]
Pairing: Orc!Steve x Reader
Summary: You earn your water for the journey to Tarrath—and more importantly, a place in the pack. 
Warnings: 18+ Only, Genre typical violence, Warlord Nomad AU, Dark Fantasy AU, Enemies to lovers, Eventual smut, References to past abuse
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“You know what this is?” Carol’s displeasure with your distinct lack of tracking skill is evident as she squats down, poking a finger hard into the dust. You squint as you reach for an answer, knowing you won’t find one. She sighs heavily. 
“This is deer-sign,” she says, motioning for you to squat down like her. You do, the ragged remains of your skirt pooling around you. It’s riddled with holes now, long tears spreading up from the filthy hem that go almost to your knees. The pack isn’t scandalized by the sight of your ankles, however, and your concern for modesty in the face of your very survival is surprisingly low, so you haven’t bothered trying to repair them.
Carol fingers the snapped shafts of grass, their feathered tips bowed low. “You see the way it’s broken? With the prints, you can tell it’s gone this way. If you can’t smell it.” She adds, and you sigh. 
“You know I cannot.”  She shakes her head at your unsatisfactory response, furrowing her brows. 
“How do your people even hunt?” She complains exasperatedly, standing up to her full height.
“Skill.” You answer dryly. “And no small amount of luck, in my case,” you mutter, wiping your hands on your skirts as you stand. “This way?”
“Yes.” 
You’re practically swallowed by the grass, barely able to see over the top of it standing on your toes—so it takes you longer to see it than Carol. Her eyes narrow, ivory white fangs hanging down over her lips as she scents the air and  grins. 
“We’re close.” You can’t smell anything but the dry, hot wind pushing your sweat-laden hair back from your face. What you see, though, are the three-pronged hoof prints in the dirt that tell of the animal that came this way, the tufts of downy coat left snagged on the brush. You pinch the soft hair between your fingers, and sniff it as Carol nods encouragingly. It’s musky, with a distinct animal smell that makes you grimace. 
“Get your bow ready.” You do, pulling it from the strap on your back. It’s heavy; the buckle is almost as big as your head, but Carol had cut the leather down to size for you, slicing off a piece almost the length of your arm with the hunting knife at her side. 
“Show me how you draw. No, not like that. Here.” You feel like a child, the way she scolds the position of your hands when you draw back the string. “Were you an orc wean, you’d have been born with a bow in hand. But I suppose it isn’t abysmal for someone who first held one a day ago.” 
She leads you through the shifting grass-sea, crawling through the dust towards a stunted copse of dry trees. You stay low, mirroring Carol’s low-squat as she makes her way through. She is careful not to break any branches, taking her time to pick her way through the brush as quietly as possible. And therefore, so are you. There is water here—a little. You can taste the way it saturates the air, and a thrill passes through you. Water, here, means prey. 
The two of you stay low, approaching the muddy little pool with baited breath. The air is still, liable to shift at any moment, but Carol doesn’t seem nervous. You are, though, your palms moist and your heart beating so hard you fear everything within a mile can hear it. 
There, on the other side of the pool, is the deer. It’s a fully grown stag, his long, spiraling horns at least twice the length of your arms. There is nothing soft in the grasslands, your father had said, the words scented sour with ale. Everything eats, and is eaten. The stag has short, thick, wiry fur, with a tail that was long, like a lizard’s. You watch as it leans down toward the muddy puddle, snuffling through it with a long, pointed snout.
You draw back on the string as he stands up, nostrils flaring. It digs into the meat of your fingers as you pull back with all your strength and let go, the arrow whistling through the air to strike the stag through the fore-shank. It’s mouth opens too wide as it shrieks, the sound echoing out into the wilderness. 
“Move!” Carol yells as the stag paws the ground with its good leg, bloody foam frothing around its nostrils. It charges only a moment later, turning the dry, hollowed out trees you’d been using for cover into splinters and kindling. You roll away, the metallic stench of its blood strong in your nostrils and your own heart thundering in you ears. You push yourself up to your feet, your hand going to the quiver at your back. 
The stag’s tail whips excitedly behind it as it snaps its jaws, circling you.  You can smell it, the hot copper of its blood, the sweat gleaming on its flanks and the sour tang of your own fear. The stag lowers its head, its horns pointed straight at your chest as it charges. You barely have time to aim, bringing the bow up and loosing the arrow. 
It thuds wetly into the stag’s chest, and with another horrible scream it collapses into the dust, skidding to a stop just inches from you. Your own chest is heaving as you stare at its body, wide eyed. It feels like you aren’t getting any air as you gulp down breaths that taste of hot dust and fresh blood. You watch as the stag twitches in the dust, its chest heaving once, twice, before its amber eyes go dark. Your legs give out, dropping you to your knees in the dirt. 
Carol emerges from the brush on the other side of the stag’s body, but you do not see her, not really, your eyes locked on the thick arrows protruding from its hide like misbegotten horns. She smooths a hand over its eyes, closing them, before she squats over the carcass. Silently, she jabs a thumb into one of its sluggishly bleeding wounds, before crouching in front of you. She grabs your chin, before swiping her bloody fingers down over your cheeks.
She gives you a pleased look as she stands away, and you lightly touch the streaky marks of sticky red she’s left on your skin, your brows furrowing with confusion. 
“You earned them.” She says proudly, painting another few stripes on your forehead for good measure. Carol helps you drag your kill back to camp, a murmur passing through the pack at the sight of you. Steve es sat by the water, his broadsword laid across his thighs as he cleans it. He stands as you approach, and you duck your head as he inspects the stag. Your breath hitches in your throat as he reaches for you, one massive finger sliding beneath your chin as he tilts it up. 
“Let them see your honor, little hunter,” he says, smoothing his thumb gently over one of Carol’s marks. “Let them see.” 
to be continued…
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drstrangefictions · 2 years
Text
What If... He Who Remains Could Send Frigg Lokidottir Home?
Chapter Three
Loki Laufeyson & Original Female Character
Word Count: 2K+
Spoilers: "Loki" Season 1; "What If...?" Season 1; "i don't want to be saved" fanwork
Basic Warnings + Trigger Warnings: Shenanigans! Like in an OOC way i think?
AO3: Link
Master List || Previous Chapter
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Frigg stood behind Loki, at a distance, and watched him interact with the mortal in need of assistance.
“A cat?” Loki sputtered. He spun on his heels and glared at his daughter. “This is my assignment? This is what you’re having me do?”
Frigg waved him off, offering no explanation. The plan was to keep that bit of information to herself until after Loki had completed an entire day of mundane, everyday hero tasks. She smiled at his distress about his assignment and leaned into the scepter, putting most of her weight on her right side.
“You’re enjoying this.” He mocked. He stared up the tree that the cat had scurried into hour earlier. “What’s the best way to go about this?” He glanced back at Frigg.
“You tell me, trainee.” She scrunched her nose and smiled. “You really only have two options. Non-magic and magic. Go from there.”
The mortal who had explained the situation to Loki stepped toward Frigg and crossed her arms. “You know, I feel bad for having to play pretend on this one. It’s one thing to live next to Steve and pretend to be a nurse, but this is just sad.”
Frigg nodded. “Well, it’s not very often that we, as superheroes, get calls for cats in trees. We have to make this up sometimes. And I think that’s the best start for Loki because he isn’t that good with people and you’re a professional agent. You can lie and you can handle him is he has an outburst.” She glanced over at Agent 22, despite her face being altered by the mask making her look like a civilian rather than the agent that Frigg has come to know, and lightly shrugged her shoulders. “That’s also not a cat, that’s Fury’s flerken, Goose. Goose is usually a sweetie.”
“That explains the mouth tentacles.” Agent 22 returned her attention to Loki who was using his magic to slowly approach the cat toward the top of the tree. “That isn’t the same flerken that took his eye, is it?”
“I believe so.” She said. She squinted up at Loki, trying to catch a glimpse at what he was doing and if he had reached the cat yet. “I hope Goose doesn’t try to beat up Loki.”
Agent 22 laughed. “Well, if that thing is as ruthless as you say…”
Frigg nodded and smiled. “Knock on wood. Oh, I think he’s got the flerken.” She peered up at Loki again. Her eyes widened at the sound of Goose hissing violently at Loki.
Loki yelped at the violent noise; he lost his concentration and came crashing down into the pavement. Goose landed on his chest and sauntered off of him toward Agent 22 and Frigg, rubbing up against both of them while narrowing his feline eyes at the God of Mischief.
“Well, that could have been worse.” Agent 22 muttered and scooped Goose up. “At least my precious Goose is alright.”
“Goose just needed a landing pad.” Frigg laughed. “Ah, are you alright down there?”
Loki slowly rolled onto his side and pushed himself up onto his knees. “How would you feel if you slammed into the pavement from that high?”
“Not the greatest.” Frigg inhaled through her teeth. “You’re a little bit more durable than most beings.” She sifted her weight back to both feet and slung her arm around the still standing scepter. She pulled an Avengers tablet out of a pocket dimension (she more than likely just opened a portal to the facility and yanked the tablet from Tony again). She logged in under her official credentials and opened up the training log for Loki. She checked off the ‘Cat Task’ and searched for something else that he could do in the same day.
Loki pulled himself to his feet. “I don’t think that was a cat.”
Agent 22 smiled at Frigg and Loki. “Thank you both.” She hurried away.
Frigg peered over her corrective lenses at Loki. “It was technically a flerken. He’s generally nonviolent.” She looked back down at the tablet in front of her. “A lot of these are going to be good deed acts; I want you to pick one.” She turned the tablet around and showed him the never-ending list of community service and good deeds.
He began skimming the list when a swarm of emergency vehicles drove past them. His head snapped in the direction that the emergency vehicles were headed. He quickly shoved the tablet into her chest and ran around the street corner to get an idea as to where they were headed.
“No, no, no, no. You’re not going to chase after them, you’re not prepared for Midgard emergencies!” Frigg followed him. “You don’t even know what the emergency is!” She grabbed at his leather coat, only to stumble forward because he had teleported himself early enough to evade being grabbed. She groaned and opened a small portal and tossed the tablet through it. She closed the portal and transported herself to the top of the nearest building in attempt to find her overly-eager-to-prove-himself father.
She spotted the vehicles a few blocks away from her; she slowly and worriedly floated toward the emergency. She landed just past the do-not-cross police barricade.
“Hey! You aren’t supposed to be this close!” One officer shouted.
“The structure is collapsing.” One officer said.
Distant chatter from remaining officers and firefighters turn into background noise.
“How many are still in there?” She asked quickly. “And did any wannabe heroes run inside?”
“One man ran inside.” The officer held his arms out.
Frigg looked around the officer. “That’s probably my idiot! Did he have mostly black and gold?” She pushed past the officer.
“That wasn’t Loki of Asgard, was it?” The officer asked.
She nodded. “Training to be an Avengers and this was not part of today’s itinerary.” She jogged up to the building but stopped and put up as many personal shields as she could before the burning building exploded. Many officers and fire fighters were still pushed back by the force of the explosion, Frigg herself was thrown back into the nearest firetruck.
She shook her head and looked up at the crumbling building. A fairly small figure jumped out of one of the third-floor windows with something in his arms. She flicked her arm out in his direction and encased him in a sheer green bubble; she brought them down slowly and released them once Loki’s feet touched the ground. Two shorter figures ran up to Loki and collected what was in his arms. The muttered their “thank you”s and were ushered away by paramedics on standby. Frigg stood up and brushed herself off as she walked toward her crazy old man.
“How was that for a good deed?” He asked.
“How was that?” She raised her voice slightly. “How was that? Absolutely insane. Reckless. You could’ve gotten yourself hurt and I have no doubt that pulled that stunt was bad for you, Frost Giant, I mean, look at what that did to you, you’re about as tall as me. Doing good things, saving lives, doing your part to preserve humanity isn’t about ‘look at me! I’m doing good things’! It’s about wanting to do good things, not recognition.” She smacked his arm.
Loki looked away from her. “What I did was out of line.” He paused and glanced over at the family he helped. “What would happen to those kids’ parents if I never went in and saved them?” He looked back at Frigg.
Frigg sighed in defeat. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right. But running into a burning building is not something you and I can safely do, and you know this. You’ve got to get back to the Tower. Let the professionals finish up here, I’m begging you.”
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Frigg pulled her horned helm away from her face, she turned it and stared at her reflection in the slim forehead covering. She looked back up and walked toward the freezer unit she and Tony had installed specifically for scenarios such as this one— Jötnar are not meant to be around intense heat, such temperatures can cause them to shrink rapidly, and that’s what happened to Loki. Had Frigg gone in after him, she would have suffered the same problem. Shrinking happens rapidly but recovering is rather… annoying.
While Loki was lock away in the freezer, Frigg was out leading her first Young Avengers “mission” in the skies (she was only in charge because Iron Heart and Iron Man were in Sokovia, Captain America’s protégé was in England with him, and Thor was off world). The defenses were left to Frigg, Kate Bishop, and Peter Parker (none of which wanted the responsibility of handling the situation called in by S.H.I.E.L.D., however with everyone gone there was little choice). With little time to call for more experienced Avengers, the three Young Avengers took it to the skies. Frigg teleported them into the middle of an all-out war between S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Skrull fugitives. Frigg shuddered at the image of Kate nearly plummeting to her death from the Heli-Carrier, and she would have too if she didn’t catch her quick enough. Peter wasn’t doing his best in the skies. S.H.I.E.L.D. agents were dropping like flies, and they were outnumbered. She was overwhelmed with fugitives, and she thought herself to be a powerful witch; at the same time, she was the only one on the side of S.H.I.E.L.D. at had magic abilities, everyone else was more scientific or brute.
They were extremely uncoordinated. Kate, Peter, and Frigg don’t always work together and when they do it’s a chore for some reason. She feels like they don’t listen to her when she needs them to do something, and they didn’t. Frigg was frustrated with being ignored, maybe they could’ve succeeded had the two other Young Avengers listened! She felt like she was the only one defending the Heli-Carrier. They were lucky to walk away from that alive…
She knocked on the door to the freezer. “It’s just me, wanted to check in on you.” Her voice was soft and melancholy. “And let you out.”
“Come in.” Loki’s muffled voice was heard.
Frigg turned the heavy lock and pulled the door open. “You’re looking better than the other day.” She slowly placed her horned helm back on her head.
“And you look like you’ve had a rough day.” Loki rubbed his hands together.
Frigg nodded. “Well, I can’t wait to tell you about it some other time.” She rubbed the palm of her hand. “If you’re feeling all right, I’d like to take you to the training grounds and train for something a little more real. I mean, I know you really don’t have to, you’ve got plenty of years on me for that sort of thing, and you don’t even have to do that today. You’re just getting out of recovery and all.” She rambled.
“Slow down.” Loki chuckled. “Let’s just go back upstairs and do something that these mortals consider normal.” He suggested.
Frigg nodded. “Right, right. If that’s the case, I’ll just watch TV until I pass out.” She shrugged her shoulders and stepped away from the door.
Loki stepped out of the freezer and closed the large door behind him. “It was kind of you to have Stark make this for us.”
“Correction: I made it with his permission and resources. He put in the bare minimum.” She pointed finger guns at Loki. “That TV isn’t going to watch itself.”
“So, what exactly happened today.” Loki followed Frigg toward the elevator.
She widened her eyes on fear and cleared her throat. “I may or may not have almost gotten myself and two Young Avengers killed.” She slipped into the elevator and repeatedly slammed her fist against the ‘close doors’ button.
Loki stood dumbfounded for a moment and only reacted when the doors started to close without him in the elevator. “You did what?”
“I’m not a good leader. Or maybe I am and everyone else is bad at listening.” She said.
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“This is what these mortals call a ‘Training Ground’?” Loki stared at the back of Frigg’s head in disbelief. “This is just a very large, closed in space. Above us is nothing more than a place for an audience. Is this a joke?” He asked.
Frigg shook her head and looked up at the plexiglass that Loki was referring to. “That’s the control room. An audience may be up there but for the most part, that room is to control what you see down here. This is the mortal equivalent of the Mutant Danger Room—same concept, endless possibilities of threats and scenarios to handle, displayed by drones with illusion tech and real impact. So, I do recommend not getting hit, it will hurt. It’s an in-door training ground and it’s used for individuals like us—magic, powerful, those who are considered to be too dangerous to train outside. Captain America and similar mortals have the luxury of outdoor training; however, I don’t believe that type of training it as enriching. What are you fighting out there anyway? A stick with a mans face taped to it. In here you have virtually any- and everything.” She placed her hands on her hips and walked toward the far end of the in-door training grounds. “What would you like to face?”
“I can pick anything?” Loki asked.
“In simple words, because clearly that’s what you need, anything is game.” She stood in front of the elevator that was just barely noticeable because the door panels did not match with the panels of the wall surrounding it. “From Thanos to myself, or even you. You could pick your very own father as a threat to handle. The choice is yours unless you want me to pick your challenge for you.” The doors behind her opened up and she took one large step into the elevator.
Loki crossed his arms. “Give me my attack on New York.”
Frigg nodded as the elevator doors closed. “Good luck.”
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siennafrxst · 1 month
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🔭 ₊ ⊹ ~֒ forgive
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pairing: loki laufeyson x female reader
universe: mcu (marvel cinematic universe)
timeline: during thor ragnarok
word count: 0.7k words
cw: hurt/comfort
click here to visit my fanfic masterlist.
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You continue to stand observing the stars from afar, glimmering luminously before your eyes. Asgard has just been destroyed due to the events of Ragnarok and the people have lost their home — for now. They were currently heading towards Midgard via a spaceship to take refuge there. Midgardians were one of the lesser intelligent species across the nine realms, but they could be very welcoming at times. Maybe they could build a new life over there…
Footsteps begin to advance towards you from behind, causing you to snap out of your thoughts and turn toward the disruption, only to spot the God of Mishcief approaching you.
A surprised yet secretly pleased expression forms on your face at the sight of Loki. You hadn’t had a proper conversation with him ever since your… fight. About him faking his death twice and impersonating Odin for years and posing to be king and betraying all of Asgard and especially you.
Yeah. A fight was one way to put it.
“Loki,” you breathe softly.
Loki connects his emerald eyes with yours, seeming to be holding something back. He was never one to hesitate, you knew that. He was always so outspoken — you’ve never seen him so rattled like this.
“I… I’m sorry, and I love you,” he mumbles in a soft tone, breaking the eye contact.
Your eyes quickly shoot up towards his, surprised with his sudden burst of affection. Before you could even gather up the words to speak up, he interupts you.
“You don’t have to say anything or even forgive me, but… I realize that I haven't been the best partner to you, and for that I am.. sorry. You have only ever been good to me, and," he stops himself to gently grab your hands and pull you closer. "You deserve so much more. I promise to you that I will do better. If you will let me.”
He sighs deeply, finally maintaining the eye contact and taking a step towards you.
“I’ve missed you since the moment you walked away from me, and I deeply regret letting you go so easily. That will never happen again — I promise.”
After all these years, you are finally hearing the words you’ve been longing to hear from Loki — and then some. You always thought it was a farfetched fantasy, but for once, it actually feels as though he was willing to change. That this time might be different.
You’ve already made the same mistake — twice — forgiving him then only for him to repeat the same mistake and somehow make it worse than how it was before. But, that’s the thing. Even after all his lies, all the betrayals you have endured because of him…
You never once regretted forgiving him.
“The Loki Odinson, God of Mischief, owning up to his past? My, where have I been this whole time?”
Loki playfully rolls his eyes. “Don’t flatter yourself, darling.”
A soft yet meaningful smile curves on your lips as you take a moment to process the last word that he said.
“You haven’t called me that since our fight.”
“And you haven’t looked at me with those eyes ever since I faked my death.”
“With what eyes?” You raise an oblivious eyebrow, fully knowing what he was talking about.
Loki softly shakes his head at your teasing before you let out a light chuckle once more. You gaze upon the long-haired frost giant, biting your inner cheek as you watch Loki being vulnerable to you for the first time.
"Loki," you call out in a soft tone, one gentle hand snaking up to his shoulder. "I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have let go of you so easily either. You were right — I was too quick to give up on us. But, never again. This time, we’ll try even harder to make things truly work. Agreed?”
A soft smile forms on his face — one that was sincere in a way that he never usually shows.
“Agreed.”
Before you could even react one more second, Loki cuts you off with an action that he only does once every blue moon. An action that neither of you can even recall when he last did it.
You feel gentle arms wrap you in a warm embrace. Being in his mere presence made you feel safe and at home — in a way that not even your physical home has ever made you feel. But being with him — reuniting with Loki once more — you knew, with the utmost confidence, that he was your true home. And there was no place you would rather be.
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likes and reblogs are vv appreciated.
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hopelesslygaysstuff · 8 months
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wanda "gets really loud when she's about to come" maximoff 🤝 natasha "clamps her hand over her girlfriends mouth because they're in a semi-public setting goddamit" romanoff
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vbecker10 · 18 days
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Loki's Silent Sentry (Part 3)
Part 4 / Part 5 (Part 6 in progress)
Pairing: Loki x female reader (y/n)
Summary: You are not just a soldier in Asgard's Royal Army, you are Lieutenant Y/L/N, Prince Loki's personal guard, his sentry and you are not supposed to fall in love with him. If you followed your training properly, you should never have even spoken to him. As a sentry, you are expected to remain silent and invisible as you shadow your appointed member of the royal family or member of the court protectively throughout their daily tasks.
Rumors (that happen to be true) begin to circulate through the palace that you serve the younger prince of Asgard both outside and inside his chambers. There is little you can do once word of your off duty activities spread through every maid, cook, gardener and seamstress in the palace. You soon find even the soldiers in your own company are now questioning how exactly you had come to earn your seemingly quick rise to lieutenant.
As the annual Winter Solstice Ball approaches, you come to the heartbreaking realization that your relationship with Loki must come to an end if you are both to fulfill your duties.
Warnings: Angst, arguing, Thor trying to be a better brother, Odin being a terrible father
A/N: I know this was only supposed to be three parts but you guys know not to believe me when I say stuff like that lol... enjoy 💚
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You close your eyes as he pulls you tighter to him, you are sure he can feel your heart pounding in your chest. "Are you really here?" you ask in a whisper. You fear he will vanish like one of his illusions the second you let go of him.
"I'm here my love," he reassures you. He kisses the top of your head and you look up at him. "Follow me," he says in a low voice.
You smile and nod without caring where you are going, you will always follow him anywhere.
He takes your hand and leads you into the room he came out of. You can see he has been busy with his magic, his abilities have always thrilled and impressed you. The magically altered office is twice as large inside as it should be and is an exact replica of his chambers. You look around in awe and can't help but wonder if this isn't an illusion but one of his transportation spells.
He smiles with pride at your reaction and puts his arm around your waist, pulling you close to him again.
"How did you do all of this?" you ask. "Its amazing... you're amazing," you tell him as you turn in his arms to face him.
"I'm afraid the young corporal spent has a large portion of her time this week dutifully guarding my empty office," he jokes and you laugh with him.
"Gods, is that why you requested a new sentry?" you ask.
He smiles mischievously, "Sergeant Tones paid far too much attention to my comings and goings." He strokes your cheek slowly and says, "Now, enough about them," he leans down to kiss your lips and you kiss him back, gripping the fabric of his shirt. Without breaking the kiss, he waves his hand slightly and your armor suddenly vanishes. You smile against his lips, feeling the added weight disappear and his hands rest on the back of your shirt.
You look up at him and say, "I've missed you so much. Did your mother tell you?"
He nods and takes your hand, leading you to the sofa where you sit close together, his arm around your waist and your hand on his knee. "She told me," he answers. "There are only two people in this world I have ever been able to confide in, you and my mother." He pauses for a moment then says, "After you left the throne room, my mother and I went to her private library. I needed her to know how much I care for you, how much you mean to me. I was still afraid my father would find a reason to send you away somewhere but she promised me she would protect you."
"She's been very kind to me," you tell him, smiling to reassure him that you are okay. "You're very lucky to have a mother like her."
He nods in agreement but you can see something is weighing him down. "Loki, what's wrong?" you ask in a worried tone.
"I hate this," he says after a moment. "I hate not being able to see you and when I do, I'm barely allowed to look at you. I hate being able to give you orders but not speak to you. I hate having to pretend that you mean nothing to me. I don't know how much longer I can stand to be without you."
You kiss him and you feel him relax slowly in your arms. "Our passing moments together will never be enough for me but I promise you, I savor every second I see you or hear your voice," you tell him.
He smiles at your response then you can see his attention shift and he says, "I need to tell you something."
"You can tell me anything," you remind him.
"Your paperwork for the transfer wasn't denied... I never submitted it to your captain," he admits, "And I was never going to."
You look at him in shock and he continues.
"I'm so sorry I lied to you. I know it was wrong and I swear on all the Gods that I've never lied to you before but... I just couldn't let you leave me," he says, you can hear the worry in his voice.
You can't help but let out a laugh and he shifts uncomfortably. "I'm sorry," you smile but he still looks concerned. "A part of me was desperately hoping you would somehow delay the transfer. I never wanted to leave you," you admit. "I was a fool for thinking if we were apart, I would be able to move on."
He smiles and kisses you again, his hands traveling up and down the back of your thin shirt. "Stay here with me tonight," he says between kisses. He doesn't say it as a prince ordering his sentry but you obey his request without a second thought.
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You stand quietly in front of the queen's office, eagerly awaiting the end of her current meeting. She had informed you this morning that her last meeting was going to be with her youngest son. You couldn't wait to see him, even though you knew it would be brief and he would be unable to speak to you. Any second you saw him outside of the time the two of you stole was appreciated greatly.
It is almost three months since your new Sunday night routine with Loki began. He would slip through the palace with ease after he dismissed his sentry for the night and you would take a left at the top of the stairs after his mother released you.
While hidden away, surrounded by his illusion, the two of you could pretend everything was perfect. You love him with all of your heart and he loves you back just as fiercely. He would kiss you and hold you and tell you that you were his but the moment the sun came up, everything would change. You always did your best to hold back your emotions as you put your armor on and returned to your silent duties.
It devastated you every time you needed to leave him but you kept your pain to yourself. You were afraid to ruin the small window of time you had with wishes and false hope that things could somehow be different.
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You follow the queen as she moves gracefully through the long marble halls of the palace, her dress flowing around her. You groan internally when a third council member stops to greet her, delaying your arrival at the prince's office yet again. She nods politely at his failed attempt at what you assume was a joke and kindly excuses herself.
After what seems like hours, you finally you turn the corner and his office is in sight, your heart races knowing you will see him even if it is just for a moment.
You can see his young sentry leaning against the wall behind her and remember how heavy your armor was when you first started. She hears you approaching and stands at attention. You signal for her to knock and announce the queen's presence which she does quickly, it is easy to see how nervous she is. You can't fault her for being anxious around the royal family, especially when you are terrified of the king and less than fond of the older prince.
The door opens and you hold back the smile that tries to slip free when he steps out into the hall. "Hello mother," he smiles at her and she embraces him.
"Good luck with your meeting," she says after taking a step back.
You look between the queen and Loki in shock when you realize she is talking to you. "I'm sorry your highness?" you say quietly.
"Prince Loki has something to discuss with you, Lieutenant Y/L/N. Corporal Glasgow will be temporarily assigned to me for the remainder of the day," she says.
You and the corporal exchange a quick look with a mix of surprise and confusion. It was not protocol to simply switch sentries, especially in the middle of a shift but neither of you were in a position to question the queen. The new guard bows to Queen Frigga and Prince Loki, then without another word they leave the way you came.
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You find yourself standing in front of Loki, completely alone and unsure why. It was only Tuesday, had something happened that couldn't wait until Sunday? Your mind suddenly races with all the horrid things that keep you awake at night. Had someone discovered the two of you have been sneaking off together? Were you being sent to a post far from the palace? Had he finally gotten engaged to a woman his father and the kingdom would approve of? Both Loki and the queen were far too calm for any of these to be true but you couldn't push the thoughts away.
He motions for you to follow him and you close the door upon entering his office. Your fears subside momentarily when Loki pulls you into his arms. You close your eyes tightly as he whispers, "I have news."
"Good news or bad?" you ask hesitantly, pulling away slightly but his arms hold you to him.
He smiles in response, "Very good news my love." He takes your hand and the thoughts that had been swirling around your mind fade in an instant. "Come, let me show you," he says, you can hear the joy and excitement in his voice as he leads you through his office.
He pulls out the leather chair behind his large desk, "Sit." You pause before doing as he asks, sometimes it was hard to break protocol even when you were with Loki. You had never sat on this side of his desk before and hadn't realized that until this moment.
"Relax," he says with a light laugh. "I promise you, no one will barge in and find you sitting here."
"Sorry," you let out a nervous laugh. "I guess I'm still a bit worried that your father will banish me to Migard or somewhere."
He kneels next to you and takes your hand. "I would never let him send you away, you know that right?" he asks.
You nod, "I know." You clear your throat, pushing away that fear and ask, "What did you want to show me?"
He smiles so wide you can't help but smile in response. He gets up quickly and grabs the large book on his desk, picking it up he places it right in front of you. "What is this?" you ask, opening the cover. "Asgardian Marriage Law..." you read the cover slowly. "Loki, what-" you start to ask.
"I found it," he is too excited to let you finish your question.
You look at him for a moment, unsure what he is talking about when suddenly it clicks. "You found... you found a loop hole?" you ask, your heart beating faster.
He nods quickly and he repeats, "I found it."
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You pace anxiously outside of the throne room, your heart pounding in your chest as you wait for the grand council to convene. "Please stop, Y/N," Loki says as he leans on the wall across from the tall doors. "You are making me dizzy."
"Sorry," you walk over to him. "I'm just nervous. What if he says no? What if he gets angry again?" It was only a day ago when Loki spoke to you in his office but in that short time, your mind had invented hundreds of scenarios that filled you with dread.
Loki seems quite the opposite, he has never been more sure of anything as he holds his research calmly. He extends his free hand and you take it, "Y/N, if I know my father as well as I think I do, he will say no and he will be angry."
"That is not making me feel better," you frown but he chuckles.
"Do not give up on me now," he says. "I told you I will find a way to make you mine and I intend to keep that promise."
You smile at his words and move closer but before you can kiss him the large doors to the throne room are swung open. You pull away from Loki and swallow hard as your nerves ramp up again. He keeps hold of your hand and leads you into the throne room.
The room comes alive around you as the council members that line the room begin to whisper frantically to each other but you pay no attention to them. Your eyes are fixed on Odin, sitting atop the tall throne at the rear of the room. Frigga stands to his right and Thor, in his full dress uniform to his left. Loki squeezes your hand tighter and you are unsure if he is trying to calm you or himself.
The two of you come to a stop at the base of the stairs leading to the throne and Odin holds up a hand to silence the council. Loki bows briefly out of respect for his parents and you kneel as you've been trained.
After a moment or an eternity, you can't tell, Odin says, "Rise".
You stand but keep your head down slightly, knowing Loki is the one who needs to address the council. You are simply here because he wanted you to be, but this isn't where you belong and you know that.
"Why did you call for the grand council to meet?" Odin asks and you look at Loki who gives you a small smile before facing his parents.
"I've called you all here to discuss the marriage requirements for the second child of the king," Loki says.
"The laws are the same for all children of the crown," an older man to your left calls out. The crowd mumbles amongst themselves in agreement but Odin holds his hand up again.
Loki continues, "I am not speaking about the laws that my older brother is meant to follow. Prince Thor is heir to the throne, the next king of Asgard but I am not on the same path."
A few more hushed whispers are heard but it doesn't stop Loki. "There is no argument that the heir must marry someone who is of a certain status and has the approval of the grand council as well as the king and queen," he says and Thor nods, knowing that is his fate. "What I am bringing to the court's attention is that the rules for the second child, the spare, are not the same," he pauses for a second, "And they never were."
The council members all begin talking at once, denying Loki's claim that he is not to be held to the same rules as Thor. The throne room fills with voices and Loki looks around as if he is becoming lost. You squeeze his hand to get his attention and when he looks at you, you reach up and kiss his cheek. You know you shouldn't but he needs to know you support and believe in him.
As soon as your lips touch his cheek, he smiles but Odin stands up, causing the whole room to go silent in an instant. The queen gently places her hand on his arm and he slowly sits without saying a word but it is obvious your display of affection for Loki is not appreciated. After a moment, he waves for Loki to continue.
Loki takes a deep breath and begins where he left off, "I am not suggesting that the second son or daughter of the royal family is free to many anyone. I am merely stating that the rules are not the same for the heir as they are for additional children."
"And what are the requirements for the son who is not the heir?" Thor asks, you are surprised that he genuinely sounds curious.
Before Loki can answer, a woman you always found especially condescending says, "Does it matter? This soldier will never meet them."
Laughter spreads through the council and you look down at your boots as you feel your face flush. Loki squeezes your hand again and you look up, raising your head high.
"I would like to know, that is why it matters," Thor says simply and the laughter stops. He offers his younger brother an encouraging smile, "Continue, please."
Loki answers Thor's question, "The council is of course aware of the numerous rules that surround choosing a spouse for the heir, but the rules for the second son or daughter in the royal family are the same as those written for the children of council members."
Several low whispers begin to fill the room but Loki keeps talking over them. "It is true," he looks at you briefly before turning back to his parents. "Lieutenant Y/L/N does not currently have the rank to become my wife but in a few short years, she will."
"This can not be true," a voice off to your right says.
"It is, I am allowed to marry a soldier from an established military family who is ranked captain or higher. Y/N's family has served Asgard for generations, several members of her immediate family are high ranking officers in our army or royal guard and she is only one rank shy of becoming a captain herself," he explains.
The whispers become louder until the council members are shouting amongst themselves. A few voices in favor of acknowledging the forgotten rule rise above the others and you dare for a moment to feel excited.
Odin raises his hand for silence once again and your heart sinks. He looks at his youngest son then at you and you can see in his eyes he is not convinced even though it seems some of the council is shifting their opinion.
"I wish to see this rule," Odin says. Loki nods and holds out the leather bound book he is holding. A young council clerk walks between members of the crowd to Loki. Loki opens the book, pointing to the page he marked and hands it to the clerk who delivers it to the king. Odin sits quietly, reading the passage again and again.
Loki looks down at you and smiles but you can tell he is as nervous as you feel. "It's going to be ok," you whisper.
"I love you," he whispers back.
Before you can tell Loki you love him as well, you hear Odin stand from the throne. He holds the book open, looking down at the page at if it offends him. "This was clearly a mistake," the king insists, still looking down. "One which I intend to correct immediately," he says, looking up at you and Loki.
He rips the page from the book and crumples it in his hand, you can barely believe your eyes. "Thank you for bringing this unfortunate error to the council's attention. From this day forth, all children of the crown, regardless of birth order, must follow the same strict rules for courting and marriage. Spouses will be chosen from the family's of the high court as they always have been," Odin proclaims. "Soldiers will continue to be ineligible for marriage to a person of royal blood, no matter their rank or lineage," he adds, making sure you will never be able to marry Loki even if you become a general in the future.
"No! He can't do this," you think angrily. Your mind is spinning and your heart races. How could he take this away from his own son.
"You dare to tell me what I can and can not do!?" the king asks in a booming voice and you suddenly freeze.
You look at Loki, his eyes filled with fear and realize you didn't think that, you said it out loud. Odin slowly takes a step forward and you fight the urge to turn and run.
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loki-cees-all · 20 days
Text
Chapter 7 - All the Tiring Time Between {TLTGYA - Post!TVA Loki x OFC Longfic}
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Previous Chapter / TLTGYA Masterlist / A03 Link / Next Chapter
Pairing : Post-TVA!Loki x Oliviette (OFC)
Chapter Summary : Sometimes the sharpest boundaries require the gentlest touch.
Chapter W/c : 8.7k words
Chapter Tags / Content : Angst (as always), brief mentions of blood and injuries. Also there's a bunch of Tesseract lore and Loki's history with Thanos that I really got carried away with while writing this.
18+ Only - Minors DNI
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⊱ ─ ༓ ── ⋅•⋅⊰ ─  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ∙ ⋅  ─ ⊱⋅•⋅ ── ༓ ─ ⊰
The silence in the cell was electrifyingly tense, and Loki wished he had something else to focus his attention on. 
His jaw ached as he took another bite of the flavorless, perplexing bread that was both stale and damp at the same time. He should have been grateful for it and its distraction, despite the woman having offered it without even so much as looking at him. But it just reminded him of the year he’d spent with the Mad Titan: Wretched. Forsaken. Totally and completely hopeless. 
Loki tried desperately not to think about it, but it was getting harder to fight as his exhaustion grew. 
The woman sat across from him in the cell, her knees pulled to her chest and her expression blank. She’d said absolutely nothing after dismissing his question about Anathema the night prior, not even when the peculiar guards brought in their cruel attempt at a meal. She didn’t even flinch when they set the tray down in front of her, nor when the duo stared, cold and unmoving, presumably waiting for her to beg for her life like all the others…but she did wait until they were finally gone to pull the tray closer. 
She had grabbed the chunk of bread first, and extended it towards him in the shadows like it was second-nature to her. As if it wasn’t ever an option that she wouldn’t share it, and despite the fact that they were in stark disagreement about their respective situations in this place. 
He felt guilty for accepting the offering, but unfortunately, he felt like he had no other choice; his eyelids were growing heavier by the minute, his muscles were becoming weaker with each new day of disuse, and his nerves were perpetually fried with wary energy. He was constantly stifling another yawn, and was dangerously close to falling asleep, to having another nightmare again. 
Loki didn’t know if he ever talked in his sleep, but he didn’t want to risk revealing any compromising information about himself or his past; the less anyone knew about him here, the better off they all were. 
But other than the food she’d shared with him, there wasn’t much else for him to distract himself with. The woman wasn’t talking anymore, and her questions had faded away alongside the hope she may have once had about escaping. That left Loki to alone deal with his questions about her, and their inscrutable answers. 
The problem with that, however, was that his mind was nothing but a tangled mess; a rat’s nest, made up of lies and false memories, the betrayals of the life he’d left behind, and all the lives that never were. Before him lay a scattering of dots, all seemingly unrelated and centered around a woman who claimed she didn’t know what they wanted with her, and he couldn’t seem to make heads or tails of any of it.
Loki used to pride himself on his ability to see the bigger picture, especially on a galactic scale. But he had come here to hide and to wallow, to purposely let his mind atrophy into a cobweb of nothingness, because that was easier than continue trying, and failing, to be happy. He felt comfortable doing that, and letting this become his legacy, because he hadn’t ever expected a riddle to fall into his lap again. He hadn’t ever expected her. 
As Loki swallowed the last of the bread, he forced himself to look at her again. She was still huddled against the wall, illuminated by the dim lantern light from the hallway and shivering in the cold dungeon like a scared little child. He was flabbergasted that she was still here, that they’d bothered bringing her back after being caught during an escape attempt. And he couldn’t help but hate himself, because the old Loki could have figured out why that was a very long time ago. 
Next to her, the bowl of porridge sat on the floor, mostly untouched and definitely not enjoyed. Her expression was sullen as she stared off into the distance, and her limbs were folded around herself as she retreated deeper inward. It almost made him feel…something. 
Of what exactly, Loki wasn’t quite sure; the feeling was old and familiar, something that was long lost while never really being understood in the first place. He told himself that the feeling was irrelevant, because it was just the mystery he found equal parts infuriating and intriguing. He just needed a bit more time than usual to settle the question marks, and then he could finally return to the blissful void of apathy. 
And maybe she wasn’t lying when she claimed to not know who Anathema was, but he didn’t believe for a moment that she had no idea why the guards were so interested in her. Either she had something of theirs, or she knew some mysterious piece of information they didn’t yet - but they were obviously willing to play the long game in order to acquire it, and that couldn’t have been for nothing. 
Perhaps it had something to do with the gem dangling from her necklace. Loki had seen her touching it, frequently and absentmindedly, running her slender fingers over the deep blue stone during stressed and quiet moments like now. Clearly it meant a lot to her; someone who loved her had given it to her. Someone she loved back, someone she probably missed dearly…
As he started to wonder if anyone was out there looking for her, Loki realized he was staring and quickly averted his eyes. They landed once again upon the bowl of uneaten porridge next to her, and a new form of discomfort wove itself between the muscles of his shoulders and neck. It wrapped around his nerve-endings, stinging the open and frayed tendrils that had been worn bare from the pain of still being alive. 
He was quite vulnerable existing like this, even though he knew she couldn’t see him hiding in the shadows. That she didn’t know what he was thinking, or where he was looking. That she was unaware of the fleeting relief that poured into his veins when she was brought back to the cell alive, or his shame at feeling anything that had immediately replaced it. 
Loki had been flippant when she was initially brought in here. He was angry the first time she tried to share a meal with him. And then he was conflicted, at best, when she was dragged back in the second time. This paltry range of emotions was far more than he was previously used to; he felt like he was drowning in it, like it was slowly collapsing his airways and squeezing out every last ounce of oxygen from his lungs. 
Because there was only one person on this planet who knew his name. A single individual, throughout all of space and time, knew where he was. She was the sole witness to his current existence, and he’d never felt more uncomfortable or on display than here and now. She had met him at his worst, in his ultimate moment of triumph when he’d finally been able to remove himself from any and all equations, from every problem that ever needed solving, and he absolutely hated that. 
Loki thought he’d finally accounted for everything when he had stepped through the Time Door and into this dungeon. He thought he’d finally fixed the issue, himself, for literally everyone - and then this tiny little variable had shown up so unexpectedly to completely ruin it for him. 
He should have been angrier about it. He should have been furious and seething and shaking with rage over this egregious betrayal of the universe. Being alone had been the whole point, keeping everyone safe from him had been his only intention, seeking protection from the pain of both betrayal and being betrayed was all that Loki had left. Why wasn’t he allowed that meager peace of mind? 
Damnation clung to Loki like a frightened child clung to his mother’s skirts, trembling in the dark and begging for acknowledgement of its traumatized state. It lurked around every corner and it haunted every shadow, constantly weeping and whimpering and howling out its anguish to cruel and uncaring souls. It was always there, lingering in the corner of his eye, reminding him of just how helpless and useless he was. That he should just give up. That he should just end it already. 
But sometimes, the damnation would transform into something far more sinister, into the tall, skulking form of a cerulean demon. Hanging over his shoulder and digging its claws into his neck, the demon would spit cruel maledictions into his ear. Didn’t Loki know that everyone around him was already doomed? Wouldn’t it be kinder to just kill them now, rather than waiting for him to ruin their life and then cruelly and inevitably take it from them?  
Hiding in the dungeon was the only reasonable compromise between the frightened child and the viscous demon warring in his mind. If only he had stuck with that plan, if only he hadn’t revealed that someone else was alive in the cell with her, then maybe he wouldn’t be in this mess right now. 
Regret, his oldest and only friend, wouldn’t be blaring its horn and sounding the alarm bells and crying out for solace. So why did it bother him so much now that she wasn’t eating? 
Loki shifted uncomfortably on the stone floor, weighing the options in his mind. The regret of initially engaging with this woman didn’t mean he couldn’t change tactics; and if she wasn’t eating, then it wouldn’t be too much longer until he was on his own again. That had been his initial plan, and there was no reason he couldn’t return to that now. Wasn’t being alone all he ever wanted? 
“You should finish your meal. There’s no telling how long it’ll be before they bring another…” The words felt like acid on Loki’s tongue, dripping down his throat to eat away at his insides. He hoped they had come out as bluntly as he’d intended, but in reality, it just sounded like something his mother would have said. 
This time, the woman didn’t shudder when he finally broke the tense silence. She didn’t even react at all, other than to sigh heavily and respond in a low and flattened tone. “What’s the point…?” 
“Well, clearly they’d prefer you to be alive, for whatever reason…” Loki’s jaw tensed as he paused, struggling to understand why he was even bothering. “Even if they bring food on an irregular basis, it’s still more than anyone else gets…”
“Maybe the only reason they want me alive is so they can continue mocking and hurting me.”
That was a more difficult point to contend with; perhaps the guards had just grown weary of the simple and mundane murders, and they’d decided to go with something more entertaining this time. What if there wasn’t a more complicated explanation for the guards' motivations? What if he was searching for logic that didn’t even exist?
Loki stifled another yawn as he leaned back against the stone wall, raking his fingers through tangled curls that were just as chaotic as his thoughts. There had to be something he was missing while attempting to put this puzzle together. “So what did the guards say when they caught you escaping?”  
The woman let out a heavy exhale, and her tone shifted into a more sarcastic tone. “Oh, normal things like what are you doing out of your cell?, and no one’s coming to rescue you. Typical kidnapper things, you know…” 
Loki couldn’t help but roll his eyes at her nonchalant answers, but what else was he expecting? He was beginning to wonder if it was even worth putting this much effort into avoiding sleep. Nothing else in his life prior to meeting her had been easy, so why was he expecting this to go smoothly? 
“Actually, the guard did say something strange before knocking me out…” The woman trailed off, pausing as she furrowed her brow. 
Loki cleared his throat as he looked towards her again. “Strange how?” 
“Maxine - or Nulan, whichever one it was…They caught me upstairs in their private quarters. Just before attacking me, they said what is gone…may never return.” The woman pulled her lower lip between her teeth as she recalled the memory. “I’ve never heard it before, and I have no idea what it means…”
What is gone…may never return. Loki turned the phrase backward and forward in his mind, trying to find its place in this absolutely confounding puzzle. But he’d never heard anyone say anything even remotely close to it, so there was nowhere for it to go. The phrase’s sentiment, however, he understood perfectly well.
“It was probably just a threat, or a taunt…” she continued with a dismissive shake of her head. “They were just mocking me, for losing everything…”
“Or it’s a prayer. A desperate request, for some kind of reprieve…” Loki murmured in reply. He didn’t want to think about whether anyone had ever hoped for the same thing after he’d finally walked away, but he was positive that they had. And he hadn’t meant for his interpretation to sound so melancholy, but as his gaze caught the woman’s matching expression, he could feel her understanding of his meaning. Loki hated that. 
She must have sensed that as well, because she quickly forced a false smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “No…surely they must have been talking about me losing my boots.”
Her smile faded just as quickly as it had appeared, shifting into a grimace as a violent shiver shuddered over the limbs she struggled to pull close enough. She breathed out a heavy sigh and lowered her forehead to her knees with another tremble, and for once, Loki was grateful for the Jotun physiology keeping him relatively comfortable. But the woman didn’t share the same luxury of such a curse, and she was clearly suffering in these dank and grim conditions. 
Loki turned his attention towards his fingers, twitching and fidgeting restlessly in his lap. This particular guilt was both new and unwelcome, like the haunting of fresh ghosts he thought he’d finally manage to not brutally murder for once. It wasn’t directly his fault she was here, that she was suffering. She was a complete stranger, after all, and this couldn’t have been his problem, or his responsibility. 
But as Loki lifted his gaze again, carefully moving his eyes to avoid looking upon her once more, he caught a glimpse of the woman’s forgotten boots in the shadows, the ones carelessly stripped away while the guards were searching her the night before. 
He recalled one of the first lessons Odin had explained about ruling a kingdom, that sometimes tact and finesse were far more effective than blades or might. Perhaps if Loki was kind instead of harsh, and if he returned the boots to the frozen woman, then she might help alleviate the nagging questions he still had and allow him to fight off sleep for just a little bit longer. 
His brow furrowed, and he swallowed hard as he realized this was the least he could do for the both of them. It wasn’t much, but it felt like chopping off a limb when he cleared his throat and forced himself to speak again. “Your, um…boots are in here. They might help you with the…cold.”
The woman’s head popped back up, and her eyes narrowed as she scanned for them in the darkness. “Where are they? I don’t - ” she replied, clumsily attempting to push herself upright, obviously eager to get them back on as soon as possible. 
Loki felt an odd sense of duty, one that had been buried deep underneath the many eons of pain, and it compelled him to act before he had the chance to second-guess himself. He moved slowly, shifting his weight onto his hip, and extended his arm out. His fingers were just long enough to barely grasp the black leather pull loops, to drag them closer and then place them within her reach while maintaining a safe distance, and without the need for him to stand.
A faint smile crossed her lips as she stretched to pull them closer. “Thank you so much, Loki.” 
He couldn’t bring himself to make eye contact anymore; it was hard enough to listen to the bewildered gratitude in her voice. His every movement had stayed within the safe confines of the shadows, and he imagined that she saw her boots reappearing as if from the loving aid of a benevolent god, of someone else who was capable of caring. 
“It was nothing,” he told them both. 
He had fully intended to return his attention back inward, but he found himself distracted by the woman as she shifted on the floor. Curling and stretching her limbs, gracelessly attempting to pull a boot back on with a single hand, and then reluctantly, with both hands. She let out a gasping whimper as she tried to extend out her left arm, and Loki noticed her fingers trembling as she tried to push through the pain. 
Obligation flared along his spine again, but this time, Loki questioned it. A childhood memory surfaced, of when his father would return home from war, bruised and exhausted and weary, and Loki would rush to his side, eager to help with removing his armor and assist in any way he could. He thought maybe if he proved himself useful, eager and determined, like his older brother was, then Odin might finally give him a chance to fight alongside him. 
But even though his seidr had been well-advanced for his age, his father had always refused to bring Loki along, despite never leaving home without Thor. Odin had said that Loki wasn’t ready yet, that he wasn’t strong enough, that it was too dangerous for a little boy to be out on the field and surrounded by their mortal enemies. 
“Such a young prince falling into the hands of Asgard’s opponents could prove disastrous to the realms,” his father had said, even though that fear had never stopped him from bringing Thor into battle. It wasn’t until much later that Loki realized the truth, that the only real use he had wasn’t needed back then - not until the direst of circumstances forced his father’s ultimate and final hand. 
The woman let out a sharp groan, bringing Loki back to the present. She had collapsed back against the wall, sniffling and brushing the messy strands of crimson hair away from her face. “Loki, I’m so sorry…but can you please…?” 
His eyes widened, and hers were full of tears. Her cheeks reddened, and her lower lip trembled as she spoke with a cracked voice. “Please help me? I’m so cold, and I can’t…I can’t get these back on…” 
It wasn’t like the cold, calculating demands he was previously used to, and Loki realized that it pained her to ask like this. She wasn’t trying to get anything out of him, she wasn’t manipulating her way into something more than she deserved, or trying to get him to commit atrocities in her name. 
It wasn’t a game or a trick designed to be laughed at later with her friends; she genuinely just needed his help. But the problem was that this kind of assistance not only required him to vacate the shadows, to come closer and share the same air as her - it necessitated physical touch. Loki was sure he couldn’t handle that. 
The muscles in his fingers articulated of their own accord, separating and curling into just the right place to summon and concentrate his seidr, intent on disassembling the atoms that made up the woman’s boots and reassembling them back where they belonged. 
A suitable compromise, Loki believed, except that absolutely nothing happened. The warmth that normally accompanied his magic was nowhere to be found, that familiar connection to the past and the present, to his mother, wasn’t opening its loving arms to welcome him back home - and that was when he finally remembered. 
Loki’s seidr was dead, because he was supposed to be dead. 
He’d forsaken his magic as soon as he’d arrived here. Once he willingly stepped through the Time Door and into this dungeon, once he’d realized that the first thing this newly-freed universe had done was trap him yet again, he decided that this time it was really meant to be. 
So he didn’t bother fighting it, and he willingly let go of the tendrils of seidr he had once clung so tightly to. He didn’t deserve the honor of wielding it, not after what he’d done in New York. And what use would that magic have been to the hollowed-out shell of a person he was now? What good could he have possibly done with it anyway?
“Loki?”
Once again, the woman’s quiet voice refocused his attention. Her expression had fallen even further during his silent brooding, and she was staring woefully into the dark, desperately hoping to see him finally coming to her aid. A deep sense of dread rose up within his chest, thick and impenetrable, oozing between his ribs to singe and suffocate his lungs like molten lava. 
Loki didn’t know what to do, and yet, he moved anyway. Pressing his palms flat against the stone floor, he bent his knees and carefully pushed himself upright. His joints cracked and popped, his muscles were stiff and sluggish as he slid one foot forward, and the belt around his waist was far looser than when he’d initially put it on. 
Taking another step closer, his mind suddenly dizzied, and his body began to sway dangerously from the juxtaposition of pushing himself forward while he’d been wasting away. He quickly grabbed onto the wall with a sharp gasp, trying to steady himself as his legs tingled themselves awake. 
“Loki…are you alright?” the woman murmured, her brow furrowing with concern. 
“I’m fine, it’s just - ” Loki sighed heavily, his heart pounding and muscles trembling. “I’m just not used to…standing.” 
Loki closed his eyes and leaned against the wall for a moment, willing his body back into operating under his own control. But despite his best efforts, weariness and exhaustion were still permanently at the helm, relentlessly steering him back towards collapsing and passing out again. 
“It’s alright. Take your time…”
Loki’s eyes snapped back open, painfully aware that she was still watching him closely, and he did everything he could to both avoid her gaze and her reassurance. Nothing about this was alright, and he could hear his father’s chastising voice from beyond the stars, criticizing him for allowing enervation to consume him - even though that was the only way to keep himself out of trouble. 
His eyes flitted across the dungeon cell, feverishly taking in the stone walls and steel bars of the door, then out to the flickering lantern light of the hallway. Loki had never even bothered to take a good look at his coffin before committing to staying in it for all eternity, but from this elevation, he could clearly examine the cuts that made up the large slabs of the walls and floor. Meticulous, flawless, precise - too perfect to have been sliced by hand. 
His gaze moved to the cream-colored candlestick suspended within the single lantern in the hallway, evenly melted away and without a single speck of soot upon the glass encasing it. From there, he could make out the grooves carved by the steel bars into the doorway’s arch as it swung open and closed, and the streaked and dark stains, smudged against the grayed and leadened floor, leading from the hallway back into their cell. 
The woman’s blood, he assumed, and Loki’s hands clenched into fists. His throat tightened, and the slightest hint of outrage began to reluctantly wake from its slumber. 
Forcing the feeling away, Loki finally closed the distance and carefully crouched in front of the woman; only then did he let her be the focus of his attention. Loose and uneven strands of crimson had been pulled free from the long, disheveled braid nestled untidily over her shoulder;her skin was wan and pallid, and her lips were tinted with the faintest hint of blue. 
Dried blood had smeared on her ear, her neck, the lengths of her hair and along her cheek. It was everywhere, mixed with the dirt and muck from the floor, coating the corners of her cracked lips and the freckles that dotted her cheekbone. The fact that the blood was dried, meaning the original wound was at the very least no longer actively bleeding, did nothing to make him feel better. 
Loki lowered one knee down to the floor, precariously settling his weight onto one ankle, and the woman’s attention was now entirely fixed on her boots. She swallowed nervously, and Loki silently agreed with the sentiment. How long had it been since he’d touched another person? Did he even remember how to be gentle? How to not contaminate? 
Moving cautiously, he took a boot into his grasp, threading his fingers between the loops and slowly pulling to loosen its laces. While he worked, he focused on the soft leather: its scent was herbal, earthy, and with just the barest suggestion of sweetness. Intricate designs, swirls and constellations and rays of light emanating from an overly-stylized sun were stitched into the leather, extending from the collar and flowing down way past the ankle. 
Soft, pliable and shiny, the leather still showed signs of its latest polish, applied with a healthy dose of high-quality wax, from underneath the layers of grim. The boots had been methodically cared for, regularly and recently, and probably not too long before the woman found herself in custody of the mysterious guards. Loki found himself curious about the circumstances of her capture. 
Stained in the same shade of night as the leathers covering her legs, they blended seamlessly together with the rest of her clothing, from the thin stockings on her feet to the chipped lacquer on her fingernails. Everything was the exact same color, save for the thin, flowing emerald tunic that had long since come untucked, and the gem that hung from her neck. 
And everything she wore was undoubtedly expensive, most likely customized for this particular owner, and she had obviously not dressed for being locked inside a damp and grimy dungeon. At best, she was prepared for a pleasant walk through the woods on a mildly chilly evening; Loki tried not to think about it too much. 
Out of his peripheral vision, Loki could see the woman stealing glances up at him. She watched him carefully, her sea green eyes shifting cautiously between his face, his hands, and the boot he was unlacing - obviously examining and judging the hideous monster whose help she had no choice but to accept. 
Loki began to feel self-conscious. There was no doubt that his own appearance wasn’t any better than her own at the moment; in fact, he was sure it was much, much worse. Dark and unkempt curls hung way past his shoulders like sinister snakes. The skin on his hands was sullen and pallor, shifting dangerously close to bluish gray, and he had no idea if his eyes had begun to drift back into their original shade of ruby-red or not. He promised himself that this would be the only time she ever saw his face up close. 
When he could no longer justify stalling with the laces, he cleared his throat, and forced his fingers to tap the underside of her leg; a featherlight touch that could have been easily missed if one hadn’t been expecting it. But the woman again mercifully sensed his meaning, and she positioned the appropriate foot for him to slide the boot on. 
Too well, Loki noticed, as he pulled the collar up to settle around her calf; she was exceptionally practiced at having others put footwear on her - at tensing the right muscles at just the right moment, and extending the leg with just enough force to seat the foot comfortably against the insole. 
“Sorry about this…” she mumbled as Loki pulled the laces tight and began looping them back and forth around the hooks. “Although, this is probably the most exciting thing you’ve done in a while, huh?” 
She was trying to lighten the mood, to distract from the previous awkwardness of such close quarters. Loki’s response was flat and measured, his attention focused on tying instead of talking. “Like I said - it’s nothing.” 
A nervous silence followed, one that was far more uncomfortable than the awkwardness. Loki hadn’t meant to be so dismissive, and perhaps he’d been far too frigid for someone who was supposed to be helping her. When he finished the final loop, he cleared his throat again and forced himself to look up again. 
“Is that…too tight for you?” he murmured softly. 
The woman managed a weak smile as she flexed her ankle. “No. It feels fine.” 
Loki noted that her pupils dilated ever so slightly when she met his gaze, and he took that as a good sign that her head injury wasn’t a completely serious one. He wasn’t sure why he was noting that, but nonetheless, he had, and he didn’t have the energy to start questioning it. Instead, he busied himself with picking up the other boot and threading his fingers underneath its laces like he’d done with the first. 
“Is this all I have left? Just waiting in this cell to die?” 
Her voice had taken on a somber, more sorrowful tone now; apparently open anguish was much easier for her than polite small-talk, and if she hadn’t been so exhausted, Loki would have guessed there would have been more than a tear or two accompanying her questions. He wasn’t sure how to answer her; bringing up the fact that the other prisoners before her had never lasted more than a day or two, or the fact that they were never returned once removed from their cells, probably wasn’t going to help her mood very much. 
“At least they’re leaving you alone for the most part,” Loki answered, lightly tapping his fingers underneath her other leg for the placement of its boot. “Be thankful for relative peace.” 
The woman sighed heavily as she cooperated. “Relative peace. That’s all I have to look forward to?” 
“For some, that’s all they’ve ever wanted,” Loki said absentmindedly. “They’d kill for it, and others willingly die in its pursuit…”
The woman’s eyebrows raised in troubled concern, and Loki tried to ignore it. He couldn’t understand why he was like this, either speaking too familiarly with the woman, or far too flippantly. He was out of practice when it came to any sort of normal conversation, but he didn’t want to be accustomed to it again. In the end, she was just a temporary distraction, and he wasn’t supposed to even exist at all. 
“That’s very enlightened, coming from someone who has nightmares every time he closes his eyes…” the woman replied as he finished tying the laces on the other boot. She flexed that ankle, and then nodded her approval while pulling her knees back against her chest. 
Loki’s brow furrowed as he met her gaze once more. Her eyes were wide and open, appearing to be without a single shred of judgment, only empathy. Loki couldn’t help but scrutinize her for that. If she only knew how little he deserved kindness, and he was irritated that she’d noticed how bad his nightmares were at all. He’d rather have not known that his weakness was on complete display, and thus, beyond his complete control. 
Slowly pushing himself back up to standing, grateful that the task and its requisite close proximity were finally over, Loki’s fingertips trailed along the cold stone as he backed into the shadows again. But lethargy was creeping back in, along with the ever-present unsettled and restless energy, and when Loki returned to sitting, he wasn’t quite as far into the dark as he had been before. 
“You know, it may help your nightmares to talk about them,” the woman suggested cautiously. “Perhaps unburdening yourself a little would be a good thing…” 
Loki grimaced. Of all the ways she could have worded it, he wished it hadn’t been in that specific way. As it were, various burdens of all sorts were already going to haunt him until the end of time, it seemed, and he preferred not to be reminded of the purposes initially set upon him by Thanos. And even if he wanted to, where should he begin? 
He still didn’t quite understand what exactly had happened to him on Knowhere; that entire year was just a chaotic haze of torture and manipulation, through both physical and psychological means, and it was impossible for him to decipher what was real and what was a lie. Even now, he couldn’t even recall the exact circumstances that led to his descent from the Bifrost and into Thanos’ control. 
Sometimes, he could clearly remember the decision to let go of Gungnir and fall into the abyss; other times, he was absolutely convinced that his brother had pushed him in a jealous rage, furious that Loki’s short tenure as King had proved far more successful than any longer one Thor could have ever managed. 
Either way, the fall had resulted in him becoming Thanos’ prisoner, and then later, as a member of the Black Order - but only after they’d finally conceded that physical torture was never going to work on the body of a Frost Giant, on an Asgardian prince raised as a warrior, or on a powerful sorcerer who already had extremely complicated feelings about being alive in the first place. 
But once they realized that he just wanted somewhere to belong, they finally started to see real progress, and the emotional manipulation that followed was probably more effective than they could have ever hoped for. It was so very easy to muddy the rough waters of Loki’s psyche thanks to the Chitauri Scepter and his tremendous heartbreak - a kind word here, a clever lie there, and nothing but speeches about revenge and betrayals, destinies and purposes, salvation and redemption, and scorned Kings and their disgraced sons. 
After Loki had been welcomed into the fold, Thanos explained his need for the Tesseract; if Loki acquired it, then he would be granted an army to help take Midgard by as excessive and violent force as he deemed necessary. The God of Mischief already knew that he wanted to be as destructive as possible - to both completely cripple his brother’s fondness for the pathetic humans, and to show Odin that he would settle for being a terrifying leader if he wasn’t permitted to be a good one. 
His idea for retrieving the Tesseract had been a clever one; so clever that Loki wasn’t surprised that Thanos or the Black Order hadn’t ever considered it before. But getting to suggest it meant that his new Master was immediately pleased with his usefulness, something that had rarely happened with his previous keeper, and Loki was so grateful for the opportunity to satisfy. 
Out of the six Infinity Stones, the Space Stone was unique in that it could generate massive amounts of self-sustaining energy. Its power signature was incredibly easy to track, and it didn’t take long for Loki to determine the Tesseract’s location inside the S.H.I.E.L.D. research facility. Under Fury’s careful and watchful eye, the mortals were studying its capabilities for power production, no doubt to be used in some kind of advanced weapons manufacture instead of something that could actually be used to help mankind. 
A stereotypically short-sighted action, one that would soon be their downfall, because none of those weapons would ever be able to stop him from completing his task. Had they realized the stone’s true potential, as Loki had, then perhaps the humans might have fared better during his invasion.
Because he knew something that apparently no one else did, something he now prayed that no one else would ever be able to figure out. Loki was in the unusual position of understanding exactly how the Bifrost had operated, of how it could easily send and receive anything from across the galaxies with frightening and pinpoint accuracy. As a child, he was fascinated by the Bifrost, and more than once Heimdall had to stop him from attempting to disassemble it while searching for the details of its inner workings. 
Once informed of her son’s unyielding curiosities, his mother had patiently redirected that energy towards Asgard’s massive libraries. There, he spent many late nights pouring over the texts and histories of the magnificent Bifrost. Once he’d devoured all he could from words, he then spent his time exploring the Realm and looking for means of travel that didn’t involve going to the Bifrost at all. 
And thanks to the Mad Titan’s relentless and universal conquest in search of the stones, Loki had access to incalculable amounts of lore, research and history that had been stolen from countless cultures and societies. He spent months buried in books and manuscripts, performing calculations and practicing his seidr, searching desperately for the perfect combination of science and magic to get him what he needed. 
All of that, when combined with his extensive knowledge of the Bifrost, allowed Loki to realize that all he needed was a power-source. It must have been fate and its impeccable sense of humor, because the Space Stone could be the engine, and the Tesseract was going to be the gateway - a terrible, incredible bridge between where you were, and where you desperately wanted to be. 
For Loki, the Tesseract was going to deliver him to vengeance, respect, authority and glory - in a way that no one would be able to undo once he finally got it. His brother, his father, the entire Nine Realms and beyond, all of them would be powerless to stop him once he figured out how to open the Tesseract’s portal from the other side. 
Returning to his research with a new sense of delirium, he gave up on sleep, and food, and his sanity while he searched for the answer. His cheeks became hollow, his eyes were sunken deep into his skull, and his skin grew weak and frail. His nerves were on the verge of total disintegration, his heart ached and his mind was hazy. 
His every waking thought was consumed by the Tesseract, and on the rare occasion that he actually passed out, so were his nightmares. He became too lost to even carry on a conversation; all he could manage were grunts and groans and strange approximations of the word “Tesseract”. Every part of himself, anything that had once been Loki, had all but slipped away. 
But occasionally, Loki would come back to himself. He would look down at his hands in horror, and he wouldn’t understand where he was or how he got there. While screaming and lashing out, the one called Ebony Maw would preach about balance, about salvation and judgment and how Loki was destined to assist the Great Titan in saving all of life, by ending half of it. He was instructed to be grateful for being allowed to take part in it.
But it didn’t make any sense, and Loki tried so hard to resist, to fight them off, to scramble to the exit and free himself, to warn someone of the terrible thing that was coming. Then, something would happen, something would touch him, and his mind would cloud back over with rage and madness. The dangerous craving for the Tesseract would return tenfold, and then he would be back on task, more eager than ever to please. 
After a quick journey through the minds of the men known as Selvig and Barton, Loki finally had everything he needed to complete his sacred mission. The astrophysicist filled in the last remaining gaps about the Tesseract’s functionalities, and the archer revealed information about S.H.I.E.L.D.'s security protocols - how many personnel were on site, what types of weapons they had, where they’d been trained. The details of every file stored on their secret servers, every individual’s personal histories - including that of the beings once considered to join the so-called Avengers, the ones that might be called upon to stop him. 
On his first attempt, Loki succeeded in opening the Tesseract’s portal. One moment, he was standing on Thanos’ ship, and the next, he was inside the research facility, shrouded within a haze of smoke and mania. By the third second, he was ferociously attacking, moving and acting without consideration for the stealth or secrecy he’d been trained with as a child. He didn’t even bother dodging the humans’ pathetic projectiles; instead, he focused on murdering the ones he had already deemed useless to his cause, and using the Sceptre to convert the ones that were worthy of it
Nor did he bother mincing words with Fury as the Director stalled for time, not even the ones ripped directly from Ebony Maw’s impassioned and self-important speeches. Loki already knew how unstable the gateway was, and that was by design. During his maniacal studies, he had determined how best to sustain the portal’s opening for safe and easy passage - first, in order to allow entry for the Chitauri forces, and then to facilitate easy travel for Thanos to find the rest of the stones later on. 
Loki’s first act of murder had been intentionally not stabilizing the portal as it opened inside the S.H.I.E.L.D. facility; he had wanted the structure to collapse in a stunning display of destruction. Whether it was to be an ominous warning for what he was about to do, or if it was to serve as a call to action for the only ones who could have prevented him from succeeding, he still wasn’t quite sure. 
Either way, he ultimately failed in the only way that had mattered. Loki didn’t achieve vengeance or respect or authority, and there was no victory or glory waiting for him after it was over. The Chitauri Forces were destroyed, the Tesseract was not handed over to Thanos per their agreement, and he’d made a great many vicious and unforgiving enemies that day. 
In the end, the only thing waiting for him was a prison cell on Asgard, and all he’d managed to do was to make everything worse. 
And presumably, after it was over, Thanos still had access to all of Loki’s research. Losing out on the Tesseract would have infuriated him and the Black Order; a minor inconvenience, sure, but it wouldn’t have hindered their quest in the slightest. Thanos still knew how to use the Tesseract because of him - and more importantly, he understood how to use it in the most destructive way possible. That was completely and entirely Loki’s fault, and he just hoped that Thanos was arrogant enough to keep that information to himself, that no one else would try and fail in the same catastrophic way that Loki had. 
Maybe the Tesseract wasn’t meant to be used as a gateway, and in doing so, Loki had ensured that he’d never get what he wanted, and that he’d lose what little he had left. All of that madness and frantic chaos and deliberate carnage had been for absolutely nothing. Maybe the Tesseract was cursed, and maybe, so was he. 
Because every single time Loki had come into contact with it, his life had taken a drastic and even more devastating turn for the worse. Attempting to acquire it for Thanos had broken him - mind, body, and soul; fleeing New York with it had landed him in the clutches of the TVA; and apparently, it had been his ultimate destiny to die while trying to keep it from the Mad Titan. 
The absolute last thing Loki ever wanted was to be reminded of the Tesseract - more than he wanted silence, or solitude, or to rot. And now this woman wanted to know what his nightmares were about? 
Even if he had made it to the prison cell on Asgard, he wasn’t planning to explain himself to anyone. What was he supposed to tell his brother, his mother, his father? That he’d been deceived? Were they going to believe that he’d fallen for someone else’s lies so easily, and without question? That the God of Mischief himself had been tricked, played for a fool and made to be the universe’s largest and most pathetic scapegoat?
No, trying to justify his actions would be a grave disservice to the innocent lives he’d taken, and telling the truth was next to impossible. Even just talking about the betrayal of his family would be too much for him to bear, and that was the only aspect of the entire thing that Loki had never, ever second-guessed. 
The woman continued stealing glances in his direction, from just a few feet away now. Still waiting for him to say something, anything, to help keep her mind distracted from her own plights. For the briefest of moments, he actually considered asking if she’d ever heard of the Tesseract, or the Infinity Stones. If she knew who Thanos was, if he’d ever been to this planet before…but as Loki fidgeted with his tie, running his fingers over the frayed and broken seams in the cloth, he knew the answer didn’t matter. 
The appropriate time to have asked that question would have been when he’d first arrived, back when the TemPad still had the power to take him some place else if need be. But now the TemPad was dead; he was trapped here, and the longer he could go without hearing about the Tesseract, the better. The longer he could go on in the blissful ignorance of relative peace, and without talking about himself, the easier this would be for everyone. 
“How did you wind up here anyway?” He winced as he spoke, hating himself for being more than a little curious about it. “I can’t imagine the guards asking you to come along nicely…”
The woman hesitated for a moment, no doubt replaying the events in her mind and wishing she had done something differently. Her fingers grasped the gem that hung from her neck, and she swallowed hard. “I was…taken from Tessaway, my home, in the middle of the night.” 
She paused, her eyes focused on something non-existent in the distance. “I don’t know how they made it past the sentries, but they…managed, somehow. They took me from my bed, while I slept…” 
Loki shook his head, trying to appear sympathetic. “You lived in a heavily guarded city. It must be a very dangerous place…”
“Tessaway isn’t a city,” she corrected, furrowing her brow as she looked over at him. “It’s the castle in Fayrest. You know, the capital city…?” 
He didn’t know any of that, of course, having never left this cell. The woman looked like she wanted to say more but was afraid to, and he couldn’t help but think about why she had seemed to imply before that no one was going to rescue her. “Wouldn’t someone from the castle have noticed your absence? Surely they have to be looking for you by now…” 
“No…” The woman shifted uncomfortably in place, her expression broken and forlorn. “No, I was just a servant. No one important enough to miss…” 
Loki had been studying her carefully ever since he’d realized her captors were going to keep her alive for much longer than they had the others. Her movements were elegant and refined, her clothing and jewelry expensive and customized, her speech graceful and enchanting; the kind of charming that could only come from years of practice. He didn’t believe for a second that she was just a servant working in a castle. 
But she was also clearly in a tremendous amount of pain, and for whatever reason, was keeping the origins of her birth a secret. Loki wondered what might have happened to him if he had been given that luxury, if he hadn’t been the only one to not know the truth about himself. 
“Ah, a servant,” he replied, trying to lighten the mood a little. His unpracticed lips curved into a forced and lazy grin. “That certainly explains why you’re so concerned about my well-being…” 
The woman’s eyebrows raised in amusement, and she tilted her head curiously as if taking his comment as a challenge. “What’s the matter? Are you not used to someone worrying about your well-being?” 
Loki’s jaw tensed; perhaps he hadn’t been behaving as opaquely as he hoped, and he hated that she could see through him just as well as he could through her. He glanced over, and decided to provoke her right back. “Well, I’m sure they’ll miss you at the castle eventually. Like when there’s pots that need washing, or linens that need changing?” 
“Yes, yes, that’s very funny…” she replied, rolling her eyes. “I get it, the thing about servants is that no one knows your name until something you normally do suddenly isn’t being done anymore…” 
The woman turned, and she met his gaze with a considering and dissecting one of her own. “Like you - you don’t need anything from me, so why would you ever bother learning my name?” 
From just a few feet away, the woman stared deep into his soul, tugging at the strings that still held him upright and all but questioning if they were even necessary. He waited until she looked away to furrow his brow again, because while she was right about him not needing anything from her, she was surely mistaken about the other half of her point.
Because he did actually know her name; it was the first new name he’d learned in such a very long time, and he thought it suited her quite well, all things considered. But he had been trying to avoid acknowledging it, not wanting it to mean something more than what it was. 
It was just a name, after all; a series of specific vocalizations designed to get her attention. Saying it out loud didn’t mean that they were friends, or that they were even important to each other. It wouldn’t bind them in any way, or obligate him to care. But if that were true, then why did he have such a problem with saying it? 
Loki could feel a nervous energy creeping relentlessly up his spine again. He wished it would stop receding, that it would stay put, because the constant shifting between relaxing and stressing was completely wearing him out. He told himself he just needed to say it out loud and get it over with, before he could start second-guessing and talk himself out of it again - especially now that she had noticed his careful avoidance of her name. 
“What kind of servant knows how to fight with a staff anyway?” Loki asked, affecting an innocent and casual tone. “I guess servants named Oliviette do…” 
After he answered his own question, Loki looked towards her again, and Oliviette was already smiling back at him; it was a bleary and quiet acknowledgement, but the sentiment was definitely noteworthy. For the first time since they’d met, he could see the dimples in her cheeks, and it was impossible to miss the way her eyes lit up with mirth, or how her lips pursed before she finally responded. 
“What? Am I not allowed to have hobbies outside of work?” 
Loki struggled to not return her smile. He almost felt a sense of appreciation for her snark and the much-needed diversion from the constant aching in his chest. It was only then that he remembered that this was supposed to be a temporary distraction; he couldn’t afford to spend needless energy that didn’t directly involve finding out why the guards were keeping Oliviette alive for this long. 
Keeping a safe distance was paramount, his new glorious purpose. Trust was for children and dogs, wasn’t that how he’d put it to Mobius during their first meeting? As long as he stayed here, keeping himself isolated and protected, then he couldn’t ever be tricked into being someone else’s attack dog ever again. He couldn’t ever hurt anyone again. 
Besides, it was highly implausible that her life would end in any way other than tragically. Loki’d already had quite enough of that - and would it be worth getting close to her, even if it didn’t? 
⊱ ─ ༓ ── ⋅•⋅⊰ ─  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ∙ ⋅  ─ ⊱⋅•⋅ ── ༓ ─ ⊰
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sarahowritesostucky · 3 months
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📖"Temporary Custody"
Rating: Explicit
Pairing: Steve x ofc x Bucky
Word Count: 2366
Tags: Dom/sub, bdsm au, dom Bucky, sub reader, hurt/comfort, enemies to lovers, gay sex'n'stuff, straight sex'n'stuff, Steve being a literal Golden Retriever, mental health issues, dub-con, forced submission, bakery au, m/f/m, gentle domination, total power exchange
Summary: The stigma and shame of being a submissive has kept Mary unfulfilled and in the closet her whole life, until an inciting incident leads to Bucky and Steve taking her in and giving her everything she was always too afraid to ask for.
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Trigger warnings: This story contains background/minor themes of eating disordered behavior, body image issues, self-harm, and alcohol abuse.
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1. Lemon Cream Tart (with Pistachio Streusel)
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“Oh, baby, yes.”
Mary grunts, annoyed that this is still going on.
Her pleasure waned a while ago, nowhere close to orgasm, and she can’t seem to get it back when she’s being fucked this hard. She’s getting too dry now, just wants him to come and have it be over with. 
“Yeah,” she says breathily, canting her hips up against where the guy—Dennis, she thinks it is—is fucking into her. He’s going too fast, pulling out too far,and hardly connecting with her body at all before thrusting again. “Jackrabbit sex,” she calls it in her head.
“Shit, Ugh. M’gonna cum,” MaybeDennis grunts. 
It’s nice to finally hear him talk. He’s been virtually silent this entire time and Mary’s whined and squirmed and panted, wishing that the sex was better and that he’d just fucking say something to her—something low and quiet in her ear, something confident and knowing, maybe putting a hand on her neck at the same time as he—
“Fuck!” he shouts, close to her ear. His thrusts start to stutter, losing their rhythm as he gets close. Mary grips him harder, and moans loudly like she’s getting close too. It makes him come, and she tenses her body and matches his sounds of relief with some of her own. It’s performative and easy to fake, she doesn’t overdo it, and she sounds convincing.
MaybeDennis groans and collapses against her, resting his sweaty forehead on her shoulder for a moment before pulling out. He flops over onto his back, chuckling tiredly and removing the condom. Mary watches him get up from the bed and pad into the bathroom. He’s a good looking guy, with just a little too much fat in the midsection for her taste. But then, she knows she’s overly picky, especially considering the state of her own body.
Beyond the open bathroom door, the toilet flushes, and MaybeDennis peeks his head out from the bathroom. “Hey, you mind if I grab a shower before heading out?”
Mary resists the urge to grimace and smiles tightly instead. “Nope. Go ahead.” She’s just grateful he isn’t asking to spend the night. “Towels are in the closet.”
MaybeDennis smiles. “Thanks.”
After he leaves, Mary gets her vibrator out of the bedside drawer and shoves the extra pillow between her legs, arranging the toy so that it sits against her just so. She doesn’t think of MaybeDennis as she gets herself off. The orgasm feels good but leaves her feeling bereft afterwards. She scowls and wipes the tears from her eyes, feeling just a little pathetic.
Like most other nights, she gets up and goes to her apartment’s little kitchen, grabs the vodka from the freezer and pours herself a glass mixed with diet soda. She winces in relief as the first sip goes down. It’s eight o’clock now. She doesn’t have to be up for work until seven, so that leaves at least another six hours to get drunk and have a nice relaxing evening in. 
It’s her favorite part of the day.
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Bucky’s just left the gym after a really intense workout and is feeling pleasantly worn out and relaxed when he decides to try the new coffee shop on a whim. He’s passed it by for months, and when he finally walks through the front doors he’s pleasantly surprised by the atmosphere. There’s a small dessert case next to the register, which he examines while he waits his turn in line. It’s filled with colorful, glossy, artful little pastries that look almost too pretty to eat—almost. He grins as he thinks about what Steve might want.
“Welcome to Angie’s, what can I get for you?”
The greeting sounds mechanical and anything but chipper, and Bucky’s attention shifts to the woman behind the register. He eyes her up and down, noticing both how pretty she is … and how worn down she looks. Her hair is pulled back in a messy bun and her eyes look red-rimmed. They have faint circles under them. Bucky offers her a sympathetic wince. “Late night?”
She blinks at him, unamused. “Yeah, I guess. Do you know what you want?”
“These pastries all look so good,” he says, trying again for friendly. “What would you recommend?”
“Any of ‘em. They’re all good.”
“Are you sure?” he teases.
“Pretty sure, yeah,” she deadpans. “Since I make ‘em.”
Bucky looks back to her, impressed. “Yeah?” He regards her nametag, sees the little handwritten “Mary,” and thinks, aw, that’s cute. He reins in his reaction. Leaning against the counter, he praises, “Well you’re very talented. They all look like little works of art.” 
(They’re priced that way, too. $8.99 for a shiny little dome thing? Jesus.)
Mary blushes and smiles a little, not seeming to know what to say to that. But she leans towards Bucky too, receptive to his compliments. She’s not making eye contact, which automatically gets Bucky’s instincts perking up. Not that he has any intention of taking this anywhere. It’s just a little friendly banter, a woman reacting to him in a way that’s naturally satisfying for Bucky. “Thanks,” she says shyly.
“I’m still waiting on that recommendation, Mary,” he says, inserting a bit of flirtation into his tone. She makes eye contact at his use of her name, her lips parting just the barest bit and her pupils expanding. Bucky grins, leaning closer. “Hm?”
“Uh, the … the lemon tart is very good,” she says. “If you like lemon. Not too strong. I balance it out with cream and some pistachio streusel, and the meringue on top of course …”
Now that she’s closer and is talking more readily, Bucky catches the faintest whiff of alcohol coming off of her. He raises an eyebrow and looks at her more closely, noticing how there’s a sheen to her eyes, how she doesn’t look just tired, but unsteady; not just unkempt, but disheveled. He frowns. Is she … is she drunk? “Um,” he hedges, pulling back to stand straighter. “Are you okay, Mary?”
She looks surprised at the question. She glances down to her nametag, then back up at him. “I’m … fine,” she says. “Just tired.”
“You kinda smell like booze,” he whispers, not wanting anyone else to hear. He gives her a searching look. “Are you hung over?” Her eyes widen in alarm and Bucky frowns, concerned. “Are you drunk?”
 “I told you that I had a late night,” she hisses. “Not that it’s any of your business.”
Bucky gives her a warning look for her tone, and the girl is immediately lowering her eyes. Hmm. Not many people are dominant or submissive the way that Bucky is. It’s considered disordered, so he doesn’t usually play around with testing people this way. But this girl has raised some of his telltale red flags, and he’s curious. “I wasn’t trying to embarrass you, Honey,” he says gently. Then, inserting a careful amount of authority into his voice and watching how she reacts, he says, “Now: I’d like an almond venti chai latté with stevia and cream, double-frothed, to-go. And why don’t you be a good girl and grab me two of those lemon tarts as well? They look too tempting to resist.” Her eyes flick up to his, some strange mixture of outrage and obedience in them, and Bucky feels like he knows, then. She looks the way a woman looks when you’ve just whispered something filthy in their ear. Bucky raises his eyebrow. “Did you get that, Mary?”
“... Yes,” she breathes, making something deeply innate in Bucky stir. She shakes herself out of her stupor and gets to work with a sharpie and venti-sized paper cup.
“Bucky,” he tells her, as he taps his card to the terminal to pay. “That’s the name you can write down.” Mary looks inordinately pleased at having been given his name (another clue). Bucky nods over to the other end of the counter. “I’ll be waiting over there.”
“Okay,” she says, once again back to not meeting his eyes. She seems embarrassed at having been found out for being drunk at work. Maybe she expects Bucky to scold her. He wishes he could. Instead he goes down to where he said he’d wait, and makes up his mind to ask her about whether she’s on the spectrum.
“Here you go,” she says as she hands over the cup several minutes later. “Bucky” is written in neat, sharp letters on the paper sleeve. She pushes a little white box across the counter at him too. “And the tarts.”
Bucky takes them without comment, eyeing her up and down instead. “Mary?” he says, because subs love hearing their names said aloud. Predictably, her eyes snap right up, alert and bright, like Bucky’s just dangled catnip in front of her nose. He offers her a kind look and delicately ventures, “Have you ever been assessed on the D/s spectrum, Honey?”
“What?”
“The D/s spectrum?” he repeats, keeping his voice low because he’s still not trying to upset her. He can see the moment that her brain clicks over in recognition, because her irises flare and her face slackens in shock. “Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Bucky reassures gently. “I don’t mean any of this in a negative way. I just think you might be on the spectrum. I’m familiar with the signs. And if you’ve gone undiagnosed all this time … well that’d explain it if you’re struggling, you know.”
“I’m not … I’m not struggling,” she stammers.
Bucky gives her a look. “You don’t think so? When here you are, sleep deprived, drunk at work?” 
Embarrassment stains her cheeks within seconds. “How dare you? I am not.”
“Not drunk? Or not submissive?” 
She blushes even harder, jaw working. “I’m not,” she repeats stubbornly.
“Oh, Honey,” Bucky says, and he reaches for her hand before she can pull it back. He circles her wrist with his fingers, marveling at how tiny it is in his hand. He squeezes—and proceeds to watch her eyelids flutter like he’s touched someplace far more erogenous than her wrist. “I think you are,” he murmurs sadly. 
It takes her a minute, but she gets angry again and yanks her hand away, scowling at him. “You’re very rude,” she says. “You can’t just say stuff like that to people.”
“Can’t I?”
Her lip quivers. She pushes the box further across the counter at him. “Take your stuff and leave.”
“You don’t have to be so defensive,” Bucky says. “It’s okay. I’m diagnosed dominant, you know. I understand what it’s like.”
“What?”
He shrugs. “I’m just saying: I’m not going to judge you. I think you should probably get some help, though. It’s pretty progressive if you don’t address it.”
“You don’t even know me!” she hisses, then looks around the shop nervously when she realizes she’s gotten louder. Nobody seems to be paying attention to them, but she still looks back at Bucky with a furiously embarrassed expression. “You're wrong. I’m normal.”
Bucky knows that arguing with her isn’t going to get him anywhere. Instead, he slips the paper sleeve off of his coffee cup and plucks the sharpie from the edge of Mary’s apron. She gasps at the boldness of it and he shoots her a wink. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” he says, as he jots down a number. He hands the sleeve back to her. “You can call that number any time, if you wind up needing help.”
“Oh my god, is this some sort of come-on?” She sneers. “Newsflash: I’m not interested in you.”
Bucky nods placidly while imagining putting her over his knee. “No, it’s not my number. It’s a hotline you can call. To talk about this stuff. It’s free and confidential, and it’s manned by people like you and me.”
She regards the cardboard sleeve like it might suddenly have more information written on it. “I don’t—”
“Here.” On a whim, he jots down his cell number as well, this time on the back of his receipt. He slides it over the counter at her but she doesn’t take it. “That’s my number,” he says. “If you want it.”
“I don’t need these. I’m not some friggin’—”
He cuts her off from whatever undoubtedly prejudiced thing she’s about to say. “I’ll be back to give a thorough review of the tarts,” he tells her, taking the box and his coffee cup and stepping away. He heads for the door, satisfied that he’s done the right thing by this woman, even if his dominance is still urging him to do more. “You should have a coffee, yourself,” he calls back over his shoulder. “Have two, even—Strong ones.”
“I hate coffee.”
He hears her scoffing at him as he goes out the door. She’s right, he thinks: he doesn’t know her. It was ballsy to talk to her the way that he did. To presume her situation from just a few reactions. He could’ve been wrong about her … 
Glancing back through the café’s window from outside, he sees her making a drink at the espresso machine. There are no other customers waiting in line. Bucky watches as she takes a sip from it, winces in distaste, and takes another sip anyway. She’s obeying his command. She took it as a command. Bucky smiles sadly from out on the sidewalk. He wasn’t wrong about her. Hopefully she’ll call the hotline, get started on the right path to fix whatever’s going wrong in her life. But even though Bucky’s a dom and thus a natural “fixer,” he can’t solve every sad case he comes across. Especially when the person doesn’t want to be helped. He’s done all he can do, and that’s going to have to be enough.
Shaking his head, he turns away and starts off for home, sipping at his—excellently made—latté, and feeling grateful that he got help when he needed it, back when he was young. He’s one of the lucky ones. 
He puts Mary the drunk barista from his mind, thinking instead about how he needs to get home to shower and change into something nice. He’s got a date with Steve, after all.
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