#mcu reader insert
Hi love 💕 let's get started)
1. Body swap with Bucky
𝑊ℎ𝑜 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑤ℎ𝑜 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢?
Summary: based on the request
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Warnings: smut, the roles are reversed, body switch, experimentation in the bedroom, unprotected sex
Word Count: 3143
A mission gone wrong, that was often what people would describe it as. The gas had hit you, hurtling you into a perfusion of bleak senses and lack of sight, as well as your partner on the mission; James Buchanan Barnes. There were many things that you could say about the man, many that contradicted against the opinions of the team. Most people saw him as a hunk of agitation, wanting nothing more than to evade any possible scenario where he would be condoned to socialised, yet you knew him to be completely different. At first, he had taken time to warm up to the other members, however, now, despite often growing annoyed in their presences, he saw them as a family.
It was a relief to experience him growing more open with people day by day, but the turn of things had certainly opened him up to a whole new experience with you. The two of you had been together for a while now, which may have made you biased in concerns of whom you were going to exhibit your want to part and endure a mission with. That attitude had gotten you in quite the predicament when you found yourself laid in a hospital bed, the strangest part was, that your head was turned to the side as you viewed your resting self. "What the..." Looking down at your hands, as though they could supply an answer, they indeed did.
One hand attached to the form that you were locked in was large and masculine, and familiar, you had often found it wringing away in the domain of your underwear, fiddling away with all the treasures that were prized between your tender lips. It belonged to Bucky, the other that you found attached to yourself was made of vibranium, sleek with the efficiency in colour of gold and black, crafted in a country that was intellectually ahead of all others. You were worried, you were in Bucky's body, rather than your own. It was a strange turn of event, collateral from the mission that you had been sent on.
If you were to assume correctly, you'd take a guess that it were Bucky encased in your body, from the heart monitor beside the other bed, the rate in which your actual heart thumped seemed to be going fine. You wondered how long it would take him, if it were he in your form, and if he were fine. He would surely panic once he realised that the pair of you had switched due to a mission failure, he'd run his mind through all the possible scenarios of fixing the problematic predicament that the pair of you had literally breathed in. And whilst that would be somewhat amusing to see him worry in your body, lacking his super strength to aid in his appalled destruction, it was not worth the stress.
"Bucky." You called out to him, a masculine tone fortifying the name that slithered off your tongue. It felt strange, he hardly ever said it himself, unless he was introducing himself to a stranger, which was often something that he hated doing. The sound that exhibited you had drawn some attention, for a doctor entered the room, clipboard in hand, as she came closer and checked your, well Bucky's, vitals. Everything on the outside appeared fine, and whilst it may have been healthy, things were misplaced. Doctor Cho was one person that you confide in, she was used to some weird shit.
"Mr Barnes." She tried to draw your attention, but instead of the eyes that you were borrowing flickering up to her, your own that your partner was seeing through snapped open, as he sat up, frowning at the sight of himself propped up in a medical cot. "How are you feeling?" She asked you, unaware of the image of your awakening that was unfolding behind her. You ran the flesh hand through Bucky's locks, gulping inwardly. The mission being enough of a failure was a weight all on its own, much less so with the additional cost of personal baggage that had veiled itself around two team members.
"I'm not Bucky." You informed her, watching as a scorned look of confusion crossed her face, and she took notes to your reaction. Cho must have thought that Bucky had hit his head, and whilst yes, there were some affects that had taken prime condition over his body, they were not the average, normal kind. It was certainly something more than a headache and bruised ego. "It's me y/n." You told her, to which she swivelled around to look at your outline, to which Bucky smiled through, making it rather obvious that it was he that was dressed in your skin. "God don't do that smile in my body, that looks fucking terrible."
"Don't talk about yourself,- or well, me like that." He defended the pair of you, it being weird to hear your own voice from another perspective. Was that really what you sounded like? "But how do we fix this, I'm getting back ache, and I thought that was one thing I'd have to age into, despite being over one hundred." That's what it's like to have boobs, you thought, feeling a little triumphant with the fact that he had to deal with your everyday struggle. Cho sighed at the pair of you, finally giving up on analysing the situation. She put the pen against the board and held it against her chest, flitting her eyes between the pair of you.
"Stay here, I'm going to speak with my supervisor and Fury concerning this. Do not go anywhere, we may have to send people out to the site that you were both found at." She left, making a smirk riddle onto your lips, that were controlled by your boyfriend. He stood, feeling the difference in height, as he ran his hands over your body, the glass room having been fogged over since the mission had been confidential, and it was best to keep the subjects to be concealed from any passers by and keep everything under wraps, considering the privacy of the intel that you had been sent to gather.
"What are you doing Bucky?" You sighed, watching as he walked towards you, clothed in your gear, as he licked your lips, humming contently. His hands rolled upwards, finding purchase upon your breasts, making you huff at his execution of curiosity. Usually he was far more of a gentleman than that, you supposed there were a jumble of hormones attained around both of you, a mixture of both male and female in a mass jumble, prompting the pair of you to act in a divergence to the coordination that you usually did. "Seriously? You are such a guy." You groaned, however he did not appear as such, after all, he was piloting around your body.
"I'm just... getting a feel for things." He certainly was, as he pinched your ass, surprised by the spark that it sent up his spine. Now he could understand why you always squealed when he did that, to have that contact resonating from another person when you were least expecting it would send a jitter up your spine. It wasn't that you never slapped his ass or reciprocated the treatment to him, but it felt different, for some peculiar reason. The fact was, that often than not, he got more than a feel for things, he was practically spoilt when it came to receiving from your body.
"Well you can wait until we switch back." You informed him, standing, the weight of the left arm feeling strange as it took a surprising toll on half of Bucky's body. He turned to face you, looking at through you with your own eyes, cocking a brow. It was as though he were trying to make you retaliate in some way to his jurisdiction; the roles really were reversed. He chortled a laugh as he turned, walking towards you in your biological stature, holding your hand out so that he could press his own to the wall.
"If, we switch back." He dared to say, like the grumpy old man he internally was. "Let's be honest doll, we aren't the priority on this; that mission was the be all end all, and they want to uncover the information that we did not manage to find. Stark will probably let us rot like this either way, he's pissed at both of us. He's at me due to how many motorcycles I've been through on missions, along with the whole mother thing that he enjoys to make jabs and use against me during poker night, but he's also pissed at you sugar."
"No he's not." You denied, feeling a ripple of denial swim through your words. But he was, for you know what had riled the billionaire so, though it was nothing that you were proud to admit. "I have no idea what you're talking about Barnes."
"Usually this little act of yours is all cute, but you're in my body, the two elements don't exactly match well." He crossed your arms over your chest, mockingly shaking his head. "I mean, if it were any other day, I'd be prepared to fuck you into submission- well, I could still do that." He prompted, scowling as you laughed at his motives. It was quite humorous, considering that he was always adventurous when it came to the sexual activities that the pair of you endured in together, it was as though you basked in the halls of Hades, for the two of you had definitely sinned.
"Always trying to get into my pants, even if I'm already in yours, in a literal sense." You remarked, smirking coyly at his look of mock offence. "Maybe after this I'll deny you of that luxury, there's enough other ways that I can get myself off." Taunting him was always enjoyable, usually it'd end you up in an intimate predicament from trouble, but this time, the ruckus was in the palm of your hand, but you expected nothing of the sorts with all current problems considered, but you should have expected more. With Bucky, it was best to always expect more from him.
"No one said we have to wait until after." He prowled closer, pulling you down to plant a kiss upon your lips, it feeling sufficiently different to the normalcy that came from the comfort of tenderly pressing your lips together. "Oh, that was weird." He coiled back, wrinkling your nose at the feeling of his own mouth, it was certainly strange.
"So you don't want to proceed?" You tantalizingly asked him, watching as a flicker of conflict reprimanded across your own face that his emotions controlled, flicking out your tongue to swipe across your bottom lip. "Don't want your own dick in you, feel what I feel when you ravish me with your fat cock. I mean, it's a shame that you can't take a real dick when you're in my body, because it can definitely handle it. Not to mention, it's wouldn't be the first time that you had something shaped similarly; remember the strap?"
"My dick's bigger." Was his instant reply, as though he were defending his masculinity, that in a literal sense, was in your hands. "And it's... different." In a sense, it was, and he had always been game to experiment. If he didn't want to pursue anything intimate whilst the pair of you were like this, and he was just all talk, then that was fine. But you could tell that he was slightly intrigued, it was affirmed by an expression that you often wore when you were too. Your bottom lip that was contorted by his will pouted in exaggeration, and you found yourself holding back one of his dominant growls.
"We don't have to do anything." Was your reassurance to him, however you watched as his eyes blared open, widening from the lack of reluctance that you deemed upon him. He wanted a great discussion on the pros and cons, a concern of conflicting interests that he'd progressively fall into, arising the motives that he was interested in. He wanted to proceed in a fashion of discovery, feeling things from your reception of pleasure; it was a certainty that you would feel blissfully good, and he knew that from his own perceptions of the countless times that he had fucked you. "It's probably best if we wait for Helen to return anyway, we wouldn't-"
Your words were obscured into nothingness whence Bucky threw you in a reverse upon the bed, it taking an extra amount of effort for the super soldier shoes that you were clad in, your own arms that were under the control of your partner pressing diligently upon his own chest, lowering you to the mattress, that you dare not say you aided in by sitting down, as to not insult the testosterone that was still viable in his presence. "Wouldn't what?" He spat with your irrational tone, encompassing you to stifle a laugh. "Wouldn't want to get caught fucking when we're practically undergoing quarantine? Now that would be off mission, would it not doll?"
"We're no longer on the mission." You justified enough for the both of you, watching as Bucky unravelled the top half of your gear from the body that he was maintaining, finding it strange to be viewing your own body get into a state of undress through your own eyes, and not the reflective surface of a mirror. The top half of the form that Bucky was overtaking due to a severe mishap flaunted your own breasts before your face, him grasping the weight of them from underneath, as he usually would with his own hands. A stir reaped the male attachment that Bucky's body had attained in the womb, the awakening of his cock causing your eyes to widen significantly, and your brows to raise.
"Love these tits." He muttered, pinching the buds of them, as he noticed the problem that you were swarmed with. "How about you suck on them doll face? That'd be hot." Bucky walked closer to you, pressing your own tits into your face as you obliged his indirect command, taking absolutely no pressure from him, as you condemned and committed yourself to the task. You had sucked upon his nipples before so it wasn't that much of a change, the only difference were that they were your breasts, though that didn't seem to matter as Bucky threw your head back, running his fingers through your own locks. "Now I see why you like that so much kitten."
He stepped away, after a voluntary moment of you doing so, humming lightly as a shiver went up his spine, as though he were being teased with a cube of ice and his body could do nothing more than react to the glazed condiment of frozen water. "Now you see." You inducted a phrase of agreement, running the hand that you were in control of over the cock that was straining at the plying of his combat trousers, as you began to shrive them off, staring down at his cock from an angle that you had never witnessed his large length from. "Take the rest off, wanna fuck you."
He did as you asked, undressing himself as you looked at your cunt as he swiped his hand through it, finding that your body was indeed wet enough to take his own length. "So, are we doing this?" He asked, as he watched you handle his girth, giving it a couple of strokes as the lids that were curtains to your sight flickered, deemed by a new wave of pleasure that you had never wantonly experienced before. You stood, his length swinging between your legs, as you mobilised his body upon the stern cot, climbing atop of him as you began to lick your way into his mouth, winning the battle over his tongue, as he gripped his own length, making you wheeze from the pleasurable pressure.
"You ready Barnes?" You asked him as you sucked a mark into his neck, allowing him to ease you inside your own cunt, directing you to the correct hole as he had a lot of practice doing so. "Fuck!" The pair of you both moaned profanities as you sunk into him, each sensation that you each experienced being a missile of change, yet the succumb of sensations being good all the same. "Shit, am I usually this right?" You enquired, feeling as though you were being squeezed to death inside of your own walls.
"Yes. You are." He breathed, adjusting to his own size that was pressing to the deepest parts within you. "Shit. Does my cock always stretch you this much? Start moving, come on. We have to finish before Cho returns. They might leave us like this, thinking that we are back in our own bodies." And thus, you decided to start thrusting, pointing the tip of his cock deeper inside of yourself as he moaned out, grasping onto your back as the cot squeaked beneath you both.
Already, you had started to feel close, defeated by the newly endured wraiths of satisfaction that derived through each vein within you. You ravenously ploughed into him, getting swept up in the clasp of pleasing rhythms throughout. The pair of you were momentarily wrapped up in a solace of bliss, too entrained in it to noticed the door opening, and two stern soldiers entering, appalled yet not so surprised by the sight. “Seriously you two?” Your eyes widened by the sound of Steve’s voice, excerpting yourself out of Bucky as you scrambled to cover the pair of you up.
“What do you want punk?” Bucky growled, crossing his arms over your breasts, making Sam divest his eyes in a shocked ogling.
“Buck?” The Falcon asked, having thought for a moment, just one, that the pair of you had switched back into your own bodies, but the tone and wording of which he spoke had hinted otherwise. Nothing had changed, there had been no miracle that had sprung upon him to convert him to his original form, he remained stuck in your body, and vice versa.
“You can’t call me that.” Rolling your eyes at their bickering, you made sure the sheet was safe around Bucky’s crotch, as you watched Cho walk in between the solid pair. Her eyes shot up as she saw the predicament, each of you bunched up in one cot together, clothes discarded on the ground. She had just made a mixture for the cure, yet it seemed that her concoction had taken too long to make, otherwise if she’d have down it quicker, this unravelling of intimate notion would not have played out.
Tags for all Bucky works; @tylard-blog1 - please let me know if you would like to be added
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Warnings: swearing, guns, way too much detail, horny thoughts, Wanda being a tease, off screen death
Word Count: 5000 (on the dot which I'm very proud of)
You join The Avengers against your better judgement.
"You've been missing classes." Your calculus teacher sighed and you fidgeted, looking up to the clock and back to him again. He had stopped you in the hall way just before you left and you were running late.
"I've been turning in my work." You argued watching another thirty seconds tick off on the clock and then look to the door. "My grades have even started coming up."
"Your grades would be fine if you didn't skip class three days a week." He sighed, thumbing through the folder he had in front of him. Your attendance was terrible and you knew it. Another minute on the clock.
"I understand that. But I really need to get going." You told him and he frowned again, looking to the clock. He levelled you with a look and you squeezed your eyes shut tight as he started off on a rant about punctuality and attendance.
You inhaled deeply, filling your chest with air and he watched you as if he expected an outburst. Instead, you released the air slowly, watching the inky words leave your mouth and on his next inhale enter through his nose.
You've made your point, let her go.
"I expect to see you here tomorrow." He warned and you nodded, gathering your things and bursting out the door and through the crowded corridors. You apologise as you bump into people, pulling your backpack up on your shoulders as you crash out the front doors and take off in a sprint down the street, dodging trash cans and people alike in your hurry.
You narrowly miss getting hit by a cab at a crosswalk and you wave your apology to the driver without really stopping. Your breath is coming quickly and you make sure not to focus in to heavily on any of your thoughts in case you breathe one out to a random stranger.
You're fifteen minutes late when you get to the daycare and Tommy is waiting with Moe, hands clutched together while their daycare worker raises her eyebrow at you. Second time this week. One more strike and they were out.
You'd have to warn Josef to be on time tomorrow.
"Sorry, Martha. Got caught up at work." You told her with an airy laugh, hoisting Tommy up on your hip and taking Moe's hand. "You know how it can be."
"No, I'm punctual." She told you snidely and you pressed your lips together, nodding. "Muhammed says you moved, don't forget to update your current address with the office."
"Oh, we didn't move." You told her plainly. "Still living with Harriet in the apartment."
"Well, Muhammad thinks that you moved several weeks ago in the middle of the night." Martha raised an eyebrow and you looked down to the little boy who grinned toothily up at you. You ruffled his hair before smiling blandly at Martha.
"He moved rooms because of a nightmare. Not apartments." You told her with a laugh. "If anything does change I'll keep you all in the loop."
"Make sure you do." She huffed, returning inside. You closed your eyes, inhaling deeply before letting it all out with no words. Moe gave you a look, casting his eyes around for your target but you only smiled at him, taking his hand again and starting on your way home.
"How was daycare?" You asked and both boys were off, chatting a mile a minute in your ear about their day and their toys and everything that had happened since Liza dropped them off that morning.
That evening you sat down with your family for dinner minus Josef who was working that night. Everything happened in rotation between you and him. You missed three afternoons a week in class because you had to collect Moe and Tommy early. He missed two at your insistence.
You had only wanted him to miss one but he had put his foot down, letting you know he didn't care about the horrible daycare workers who looked down on you all. They hated the fact you were an interracial family, the only one in the daycare.
It wasn't hard to figure out none of you was related by blood. Tommy was white, Moe was Indian, Josef was Ethiopian. On top of that, the twins and Bo had gone to the same daycare. The twins were Mexican while Bo was Korean. You were a hodgepodge of ethnicities with Eliza and Edith coming in as Polish and Irish respectively.
It helped that you had been a foster family, reminded people that you had all been tossed together under the watchful eye of Harriet. As far as people were aware that was how it always had been and nothing had changed since. Not really.
Except for the fact that Harriet was gone and the second you turned eighteen you had adopted every one of the kids in a not-exactly-legal way. All that matters is that you had the paperwork should anyone ever ask questions. No one had to know you were a senior in high school, struggling to get a diploma.
When dinner was over you helped the kids through their evening routine, Eliza a steady presence by your side. She was your rock with the kids, so much like you when you were sixteen that it hurt to look at her sometimes. You had wanted better for her than helping babysit six nights a week while you or Josef worked.
She understood it, for the most part. Why she couldn't hang out with her friends or go to sleepovers or do any after school clubs. She took it reasonably well the first time you sat her down to explain why school dances were out of the question.
The only time all nine of you divided up was for school and at that, you were all in a small radius, easily reached in an emergency. You had made sure of it. Nothing would ever come between you and your family and your powers came in handy when you needed to do some convincing.
You couldn't fabricate a lie from anything. You couldn't make memories for people or change the ones they had. You could just change how they perceived what was happening. You could plant reactions to real-time events, paranoia from past ones if you needed to. You could change how they read the scenario. You could convince a bunch of caseworkers that you were good with the kids and it was perfectly reasonable for them to allow you to adopt them.
You could convince the bank manager that giving you a loan was a great idea because you were definitely trustworthy and paying it back in tiny increments a week was the best way for things to be done. You couldn't convince them that you had paid it back but you could convince them that ten dollars a week was an appropriate amount.
It was give and take. Usually a lot more take.
After everyone had washed their faces and brushed their teeth you did the rounds of tucking the youngest ones in. You read Tommy, Moe, and Lou a story in their room, discussing what their favorite dinosaur was. When you finished with them, tucking them all in with a kiss on the forehead you made your way to the girl's room. Bo, Rìa, and Edith were tucked in, choosing a better book than the boys, of course.
You tucked Bo and Rìa in, sitting with Edith for a little while, asking her about her day. She was getting older now and you gave her more liberties than the others because she wasn't a kid and you wouldn't treat her like one. She had been aware of most of the trauma she had been through and it had aged her beyond her years.
No matter how hard you tried, you couldn't give any of the kids a normal childhood. She told you about how good her grades were and how she was getting so much better at braiding hair because her friend had been showing her how. You let her babble on, enjoying her company. When she tired herself out you gave her the same kiss on the forehead as the rest, tucking her in carefully.
"Goodnight, mo ghrá." You whispered against her forehead quietly and she smiled, shutting her eyes tightly. You did your best with them to keep their heritage alive. You had slaved away learning languages in the most basic sense and finding places for the kids to go to learn about who they were.
On Sunday's you rounded up the kids who wanted to go to their respective places of worship and spent the day helping them through their worship. Josef prayed most mornings at sunrise, doing his best to observe all five times for Salat. Edith, Rìa and Lou were Roman Catholic's and so they prayed at the local cathedral at twelve most Sundays. Liza had long since declared herself Agnostic after years of struggling to find a God she believed in.
After mass everyone accompanied Bo on her visit to the Buddhist Temple closest to the apartment and she got her turn to worship and immerse herself in her culture. Last was little Moe who had a Shrine in the apartment where he worshipped clumsily at four years old. You had guided him through it, seeking out other Hindu's to find out how best to help him.
You were by no means perfect, you slipped up and mixed up languages you were far from fluent in but you did the best you could. You liked to think it was enough.
The following morning you were on drop off duty for the twins and Bo. Josef was bringing Tommy and Moe and Eliza was bringing Edith.
You had just watched the others go in the door, waving twice at Bo who always turned around before the door shut behind her when you felt the eyes on your back.
You continued to walk slowly, unwilling to let anyone know that you had spotted them. You didn't need to be looking at them.
She is not a threat.
You exhaled the words carefully, letting them slip from between your lips. Without looking up you felt the eyes leave as you stepped onto the street the high school was on, catching up to Joey and Liza who were waiting on the steps.
"Think I'm gonna have to take Stark up on his offer." You sighed, pushing yourself in between them. "Another Agent followed me while dropping off the kids."
"You think we're in danger?" Joey asked and you sighed, shrugging unsure.
"Don't know. I can't take the risk of them taking any of you away and I can't pull you all from school." You told them quietly, pausing at Liza's locker. "This way I have a little control."
"You're not working in communications, are you?" Liza asked, pulling her books out. "You're going to be working with the Avengers."
"I don't know. It's okay though because I work from the outside, I won't have to get involved." You promised, squeezing her shoulder. "Might earn a little extra cash, get a babysitter and give you the night off every now and then."
"Don't get ahead of yourself." Liza laughed, nudging your shoulder. "They might decide you've got no talent after day one."
"So, what's the perks of all this stuff? Do I get paid, adored globally? Like how does it work?" Tony looked up at you and over to the elevator you had come through.
"How did you get up here?" He asked, waving a hand to quiet the music. "You need my permission to enter the lab."
"Your receptionist thought I was a trustworthy young lady." You told him with a shrug, examine a tray of tools idly.
"Jarvis?" Tony asked and you pursed your lips, waiting for the ceiling voice to return.
"She had security clearance. I didn't detect her breathing levels change." Jarvis told Tony and he looked to you, eyes narrowed.
"I don't always have to change my breathing. I could convince you to sign over the company with breathing any deeper." You smiled, spinning a screwdriver between your fingers.
"Which I won't do. Because I'm here to be a team player." You told him, smiling brightly. "On the basis that Shield leaves me the fuck alone."
"They been bothering you and the Brady Bunch?" He asked, eyebrow raised. "Adoptive mother of eight at only eighteen. Impressive."
"What can I say, I've got that maternal instinct." You told him, running your fingers over the increasingly smaller tools. He watched you closely, letting you explore his lab.
"You could bring them here, we've got-" Tony tried and you rolled your eyes. You looked up from the tools to where he was watching you.
"No. I don't trust you. I don't trust anyone on your team outside of a working capacity. I don't want to hear you mention my kids, I don't want anyone to know about them." You warn him, hand drifting over a heavy metal mallet. "Or I'll convince you to break your own knees."
"That's kind of creepy kid." You tossed the mallet lightly, catching it again before grinning widely. "Lucky you promised your Mom you'd do no harm, right?"
"If you still believe I've got a mom at home then you're not the genius you think you are. Surely you've read my file by now. You must know how she dropped me off and turned her back on me." You told him darkly, flipping the mallet again. "I couldn't control myself as a kid. I drove her crazy."
"That wasn't your fault." Tony insisted. "Your not responsible for her not being able to cope."
"I never said I was. Foster care was probably the best thing for me. No one had me long enough to figure things out. I learned to control it early enough." You told him with a shrug. "Just in time for Harriet and Jordan to find us."
"Jordan wasn't around for long." Tony told you evenly. "Terrible accident, his death."
"Was it?" You asked curiously, eyebrows raised. Tony was watching the mallet in your hand. "I suppose some people might think so."
"What about Harriet's death?" He asked cautiously. "Another terrible accident?"
"Actually, yes." You told him, putting the mallet down. "I'd like a job, an actual one here in the Tower. I'll take a job in cleaning, whatever. I'm not fussy."
"What about school?" He asked and you shrugged.
"I need to be available for the kids more. I also need something flexible. I have to be able to finish before the youngest two get out of daycare at one-thirty." You tell him with a shrug.
"You want to be an Avenger and a domestic worker?" Tony asked. "It's a bit of a double life."
"I've got kids to put through college Tony. Eight of them if they want." You told him with a sigh and he pursed his lips, shrugging.
"I cover the cost of childcare for the employees of the Towers. Consider daycare paid for. I also need an evening cleaner for the canteen." He shrugged and you rolled your eyes.
"You knew off the top of your head what kind of jobs you had going?" You asked and he shrugged as if he couldn't believe you were doubting him. "We also offer scholarships and internships. Your eldest boy need a job?"
"Don't push it Stark.
"I know Pappu, I'm so sorry." You whispered down the phone, pulling at the awkwardly tight stealth suit you were wearing. The engine of the quinjet was a lot quieter than you thought it was but you still had to strain to hear the crying boy down the phone.
"You always come home." He cried and your heart broke. "You need to tuck me in!"
"Moe, I'm working. You know this happens sometimes when Josef doesn't come home until after dark. I gave Liza all the kisses before I left, now you need to get into bed." You assured the young boy who was trying to control his breathing.
"Will you bring me home a surprise?" He asked through his sniffles. "And Tommy?"
"I'll bring you home the best surprise ever." You promise him gently. "I'll be waiting for you when you finish school."
"What kind of name is Puppa?" Tony asks when you return to where he and Steve are sitting, Barton was flying the quinjet and had taken his hearing aids out because he fucking hated listening to Steve and Tony on their own.
You figured he also thought it would stop you from being able to control him. It wouldn't.
"Pappu." You corrected, rolling your eyes. "It's a Hindi nickname for a small boy, which is what Muhammad is."
"He the little kid I met?" Tony asked and you shot him a look, eyebrows scrunching together.
"No. That was Tommy. Muhammad is the next youngest." You told him with a sigh.
"What ages you got?" Steve asked quietly and you looked up at him.
"Two-year-old, four-year-old, a pair of eight-year-old twins, a ten-year-old, a twelve-year-old, a sixteen-year-old, and an eighteen-year-old." You told him and he winced.
"That's a lot." He told you. "Where'd you all come from?"
"A womb." You answered blankly and he shot you a bored look so you shrugged.
"CPS." You tried again and he huffed. Tony laughed a little, leaning back in his seat and making himself comfortable. "America, India, Mexico, Korea, Ireland, Poland, and Ethiopia. Liza and Edith are second-generation immigrants. The twins, Bo and Joey were born in their home countries and then moved over to America. Muhammed's parents immigrated while his mother was pregnant and Tommy was born here."
"A lot of culture in one house. How do they keep their culture alive?" Steve asked, genuinely curious. "Can any of them speak their languages?"
"All of them. Josef is fluent in Amharic, Liza can speak Polish and Russian on top of English. Gaelic is a dying language but Edith loves poetry and even writes her own in Irish. Bo spends her Friday evening down at the Korean market learning her own language. The twins speak a blended version of Spanglish and Tommy has picked up a little of everything." You told him, passionate about the subject. So much so that both men were giving you odd looks.
"I'm not going to whitewash them because they live in America now. They deserve to grow up knowing who they are and why they're different." You tell them.
"My ma was Irish," Steve said conversationally. You looked up at him curiously and he shrugged. "I was supposed to be an All-American Golden Boy. They washed out the fact that my mother was an Irish Immigrant who was put down every chance people got."
"You know the language?" You asked, interested this time.
"A little. I'd like to meet Edith if you wouldn't mind. It's nice to have someone to share with." He told you honestly and you felt those walls of yours close back up and you leaned backward, away from the conversation and away from Steve.
"I don't think that would be wise." You told him and his face dropped.
"Drop zone in ten," Clint called back and Steve bothered himself with gathering his things and turning his back to you. Tony only shrugged, he knew he wasn't allowed to bother you when it came to the kids.
"In and out." Tony reminded you both as the quinjet landed. You stepped out to the darkness of an empty building. But it only appeared empty. According to Tony, it was a hive of activity, Hydra activity with very important information.
Tony stepped forward, melting the locks on the heavy door. Steve caught it before it could crash into the ground, lowering it carefully. You trailed after them both, waiting for when you'd be needed.
They're supposed to be here. The director called them in. Act natural.
You were releasing slow breaths, letting your words wash over the agents who lowered their guns, letting the three of you pass through unscathed. You ignored Steve and Tony's back and forth, inhaling deeply at a large door.
You held a hand up, pushing the door open only slightly. Three men sat by the computers and you released the breath you were holding, letting it move across the room like smoke and into their heads.
The base isn't safe. You need to download everything onto external hard drives and delete it all from the mainframe.
The paranoia you bred in them was only helped by the claxon suddenly sounding and the rush of feet thundering down the hall. The three men inside began working quickly to download all they had been working on.
You began to push out sharp breaths of instruction, aiming them at the agents charging towards you. It caused confusion, the front rows pausing midstep so the one's behind them ran into their backs.
Not them, they aren't the threat. Find the threat.
It washed over them all and they ran by the three of you huddled against the door, lulling the computer operators into a false sense of security as they worked. You gave them a few minutes and the door opened, a gun pointed directly at your head.
Give her the hard drives, get to safety. She's trustworthy.
They handed over a backpack and you promptly passed it to Tony who's Iron Man faceplate gave nothing away. Steve's face told you everything you needed to know. He had doubted you. His mistake.
When you stepped off the quinjet the following morning you were hit with the thought that you'd probably be able to walk everyone to school and they wouldn't need to go to the breakfast groups they attended because the high school started before them.
"You might need this." Tony handed over a duffel bag and you opened it to find a collection of toys and books. "You promised them a surprise."
"I completely forgot." You told him honestly, zipping the duffel bag up. "Thank you."
"Don't mention it." He waved you away. You shook your head with a smile, making a break for the elevator. You managed to get in the door just as Josef was finishing his morning prayer and he grinned at you as he rolled up his prayer mat.
"Morning, Ihiti." He hugged you in passing and you kissed his cheek, hefting your bag up onto the island.
"Morning, Wenidimi." You told him quietly, searching through the bag and handing over what looked like a Summer intern package and he took it with raised eyebrows.
"Stark is recruiting now?" He asked, pouring you a mug of coffee. You shrugged and handed over a bag of Ethiopian coffee with an impressed smile. He held it in his hands for a few minutes before looking at you. "Is he trying to buy you or me?"
"Both I think." You told him honestly, pulling out the rest of the gifts he had packed away and you wondered who had gone to the effort of tracking all of these down in the middle of the night.
He had played to what you told him and each gift had something that related back to each of your kid's ethnicities. You wondered if he had known before you had said as much on the quinjet.
For Eliza, there was a pair of gorgeous amber earrings that boasted to be authentic Polish amber. You closed the earring box, grudgingly impressed with Stark and his team.
Edith got a book by Seamus Heaney, a well known Irish poet and author. You couldn't help but trace your fingers over the cover and shake your head at him. He was going to make things very hard.
For Bo, there was a Korean Hanbok doll that you knew the little girl would adore. You smoothed the red skirt down and set the doll next to Eliza's earrings.
Lou and Rìa got matching Alebrijes animal carvings with complementing colors. The vivid blues and reds made your eyes hurt a little but they were gorgeously crafted and you knew the twins would adore them.
Moe was given a Lattu spinning top that you knew he'd have hours of fun with but you were bound to step on hundreds of times when he left his toys lying around.
Lastly for Tommy was a teddy bear with soft brown fur. You held it against your chest, your mind racing as you wondered.
Was he trying to buy your trust? Did he know you had ulterior motives? Was he going to stop you?
"You okay?" Joe asked, watching you admire all the gifts. You squeezed the teddy once more before nodding, swallowing the lump in your throat. "You're doing it for all the right reasons."
"I know but it hurts to see what it could be." You told him quietly and placed the teddy down next to the other toys and joined Joey in his effort to make pancakes.
One by one the children woke and cooed over their gifts and toys, talking a mile a minute in your ear. Moe was hanging from your neck, legs wrapped around your middle the whole morning, his spinning top tucked between you both safely.
"I missed you too, Pappu."
The only issue you had with the whole joining the Avengers thing was the fact that Wanda could read minds. You couldn't afford to give yourself away and Peter assured you she would never go rooting through your mind without asking first. It had been a hard rule in the beginning apparently.
She couldn't however, stop herself from hearing what people were thinking within the moment. She ignored it all mostly, letting it float through her like a tv playing in the background that she had finished watching.
Which left you with very few options for your train of thought. You either paid very close attention to everything going on in the room or you distracted yourself as best as possible in the worst way you could.
By watching her.
"You have the mind of a pubescent boy." She told you one day when you had been sitting on the quinjet, coming home from another quick mission. You hadn't had an over amount to think about so you were thinking of a skirt she had been wearing when she boarded the quinjet.
"You have the body of the girl of my dreams." You replied, a smirk on your lips. She laughed in delight while Steve and Bucky rolled their eyes, their enhanced hearing allowing them to pick up on your words.
"You are gay?" She asked quietly as if it was some big secret or something to be ashamed of. You weren't ashamed of anything. Not anymore.
"I am horny." You replied with a shrug, letting your eyes rest on the dip of her uniform. It really was just a little too low for practicality.
"So you like women?" She asked again and you shrugged again, chewing on your bottom lip.
"I like everyone that doesn't try to kill me." You told her honestly. It was quite a good way to narrow things down and it made Bucky snort in laughter.
“Kill you?” She asked, as if she couldn’t understand why anyone would want to.
"I'd let you kill me though. I'd probably beg." You told her and then winced at your candid words. It was a bit much.
"Beg me to kill you?" She asked in confusion and you decided to stick with it, own your words and your blatant whore thoughts. You weren't ashamed.
"Twitch those red fingers at me. Use your 'force' or whatever to choke me. I'll sell my soul." You teased and she flushed red, chewing on her bottom lip. You kind of wanted to chew on it yourself.
"You are so very strange." She told you honestly and you nodded, eyebrows raised. She wasn't wrong.
"So my Mom says." You told her with a wink. You rested your elbows on your thighs, leaning forward and thinking about the skirt again to avoid thinking about your mother. It had been very nice.
"You think so vividly. You tune everyone out. If only you weren't imagining how my ass looks under my skirt." She told you in a whisper but from Bucky's laugh and subsequent groan when Steve elbowed him, she hadn't been successful.
"If it looks that good with the skirt, it can only be better without." You told her honestly and she swallowed roughly.
"Do you think about anything other than sex?" She asked and you lifted one shoulder in a half shrug.
"Yeah, whenever you aren't in my line of vision." It was an honest answer at least.
"My underwear are blue, not white." Her lips pressed against your ear as she barely breathed the words against your skin. Your jaw dropped but from Steve and Bucky's curious expression you could only guess they hadn't heard.
"They got a little bow?" You asked causing their expression to crease as they guessed what Wanda had whispered. You couldn't even bring yourself to be embarrassed when Wanda pressed herself closer to your side, her breasts brushing against your upper arm as she leaned in to whisper again.
"Maybe." You had to have been imaging the drag of her tongue against the shell of your ear.
"Good luck getting me to think of absolutely anything else for the foreseeable future. Good thing I dropped out or I'd fail every class I got thinking about little bows." You told her in a breath. She only laughed, her hand running up your back to your neck.
"Your imagination is just so very close." She told you quietly and you groaned when her fingers caught in your hair at the base of your skull.
You were ruined.
Feedback is much appreciated guys
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ok you said your requests were open, so can you do a bit of post-mission hurt/comfort with wanda? maybe r accidentally got hurt bc of a bad call on wanda's part, so there's a bit of guilt-fueled angst too?? bc i've had this idea for ages and i trust you with it bc i have zero writing skills. i might also blow up ur inbox, so sorry in advance - rust anon
Anon, please do not in any way shape or form feel bad for blowing up my inbox. I love getting requests! You didn’t specify pronouns so I went with gender neutral ones just to be safe! Thank you for your request Angel, I hope you enjoy ☺️
Warnings: violence, injuries, angst, medicinal pain killers, blood
“This is not what I expected when you said you wanted to spice up date night!” You yelled, kicking through another door as Wanda took care of the herd of shooters behind you.
“It’s not exactly what I had in mind either!” Wanda replied, her hands moving quickly to incapacitate the shooters while you searched for a way out and your two missing colleagues.
“If this is your way of breaking up with me then message received, loud and clear!” You called over your shoulder. Wanda only laughed, continuing to work through your assailants.
It was only early days between you both, probably too early to joke about breaking up but you and Wanda weren’t entirely conventional.
The lack of noise over the com unit was making you worried and you kicked through another door particularly roughly.
This was supposed to be a quick mission. Getting in and getting out of the compound in no time which wasn’t working out.
Your partner Hayley and Clint had gone dark almost thirty minutes ago. It worried both you and Wanda because according to all intel you had received, you’d both taken the corridor that was suppose to prove difficult.
You and Hayley had been partners almost six years and never took a mission without the other if it could be helped.
The only time it had happened was when you’d broken your wrist several months ago and she’s gotten roped into working with Clint. He now insisted on working with Hayley whenever the Avengers and Shield Agents came together.
You came hand in hand with Hayley which had eventually led to you meeting Wanda. It was the best thing that had ever happened to you and you’d bought Hayley three bottles of her favorite Irish whiskey to make up for it.
Another set of doors and Wanda brought the ceiling down in a controlled way, blocking off the agents the other side of the door. It gave you a minute to reload and catch your breath.
“I don’t want to break up with you. I do want to reschedule our date tonight though. I don’t think I’m going to make it.” She told you earnestly and you laughed.
“Tomorrow night, eight?” You asked, loading your gun and raising your eyebrows.
“Eight.” She agreed and you both were off, sprinting down the corridor that should lead you to where Clint and Hayley had disappeared from.
Atleast, one of the dividing corridors would do that.
You shared a look with Wanda and she closed her eyes, inhaling deeply as she attempted to listen out for either Clint or Hayley. She opened her eyes on the exhale, shaking her head.
“We should split up.” She told you and you winced before nodding. It was the only way to go about things.
“If you can’t hear them then they’re too far away. By the time we both get down a corridor and figure out it’s the wrong one we might be too late.” You agreed.
“I’ll call Steve, he isn’t more than twenty minutes out.” She told you and you nodded, holding your hand out, fist clenched.
“You’re a child.” She told you fondly and you both shook your fist three times. You pulled rock and she pulled paper. You realised a second too late she could read your mind. “I’ll go right.”
“Perfect. See you soon.” You ducked in for a quick kiss before taking off at a run without looking back.
You weren’t sure wether it was good or bad that the corridor you’d gotten lumped with had been abandoned. There was no sign of life in any of the rooms you passed and the feeling of being watched made you itch between your shoulder blades.
You had your gun slightly raised in your grip and you were listening closely for a sound that wasn’t your own footfalls. It had been a noise behind you that distracted you. An errant agent that had been hiding in an office You had bypassed, deeming it clear. Not clear enough.
Three gunshots later you were running again, your left leg screaming in protest and your right arm ached so bad you had to hold your gun in your left.
You didn’t see the wire. It tripped you up, sending you sprawling. You used the momentum, scrabbling forward across the linoleum flooring to get as far away as possible.
The explosion blasted you against the wall and your last thought was that you’d wake in time for your date.
You woke up slowly, well aware someone was talking but you hoped they weren’t talking to you, you were too tired to answer. Your eyes opened and you blinked away the flashing red lights. You were in someone’s arms and they were yelling.
Your leg hurt but not the one you had been shot in which was not good. Your head was thumping and you never got to figure out who was yelling because the darkness overtook you and you succumbed to the numbness again.
When you woke next it was to the beeping rhythm of what could only be a heart monitor. It had to be the most annoying sound in the universe. You’d bet your life.
You were pleasantly buzzed and in no pain which meant you were on the good stuff. Dr. Cho was a goddess.
“Hey sleepy head.” Hayley chuckled when your eyes fluttered open. “Think you slept long enough?”
“Wha’ time ‘s it?” You slurred and she laughed at you before lifting her watch to her face and dropping it again.
“Almost three in the afternoon.” She told you, petting your hair fondly. “Gave us quite a scare.”
“Gonna make date night.” You sighed happily, reaching a shaky hand out for a cup of water by your bedside. Hayley helped you sit up and take a sip.
“Date night was yesterday. You’ve been out for two days.” Hayley told you. Now that you were awake you had a niggling awareness of something with your right leg. You pulled the blanket back and found a bright red cast with Hayley’s signature already scrawled across it next to Clint’s.
“Damn.” You whispered. Your other leg was heavily bandaged too and your right arm was well wrapped up. “Where’s Wanda?”
“Probably our hovering in the corridor trying to convince Cho to check your vitals for the eighteenth time.” Hayley sighed. “She hasn’t been in since you got back. She’s in a mood.”
“Oh.” You mumbled, looking to the door and back to Hayley. “I’m going to be okay though, right?”
“No.” She said solemnly. “You’re going to be that ugly forever.”
“Fuck off.” You laughed, smacking her hand away when she poked your cheek. “Why won’t she come in?”
“Thinks it’s her fault. Apparently she cheated on Rock, Paper, Scissors or something along those lines?” Hayley said and then furrowed her eyebrows. “What sort of dumbass plays Rock, Paper, Scisssors with someone who can read minds?”
“The same dumbass that got shot in one leg and broke the other.” You groaned, inhaling deeply as the niggling awareness became a subtle ache.
“You’ll never learn.” Hayley sighed, pressing your call button and almost immediately a nurse bustled in, checking your charts and your monitors. “She’s sore.”
“‘m not.” You insisted childishly and Hayley only raised her eyebrow. “Only a little.”
“Time to go back to sleep.” The nurse told you, fiddling with the IV in the back of your hand. “Sweet dreams, darlin’.”
When you woke again Clint was by your bedside, chewing loudly on chips and watching something on his phone.
“Tell Wanda if she doesn’t get over her one-woman pity party then I’m gonna drag myself out of this bed and down to her apartment.” You told Clint, teeth gritted against the onslaught of pain your wounds brought.
“You want some painkillers?” He asked, hand paused between the bag of chips and his mouth.
“I want my girlfriend.” You grunted, your left hand raising to your right bicep where you’d been shot. “Now.”
“On it.” Clint scrambled from the chair and out the door just as a nurse bustled in looking all business.
“Some more painkillers.” She told you softly, barely giving you a chance before she was opening the IV line again and offering you the cool relief of medicine.
The door opened and you reached your uninjured hand out to Wanda. You had no idea if she took it or not. You had already been pulled under by the meds.
“If I get knocked out one more time I’m going to scream.” Wanda was sitting in a chair near your bed but too far away to touch. “How long has it been?”
“Four days.” Wanda looked dreadful. The bags under her eyes were a Deep Purple and her cheeks appeared gaunt as if she hadn’t been eating or resting. “Are you in pain?”
“No.” You told her evenly. “Have you slept in four days?”
“No.” At least she was honest. “Haven’t slept either.”
You paused in opening your mouth to ask the question she had just answered. “Why’s that?”
“Been waiting for you to wake up and tell me it’s over.” She admitted and you scrunched your nose up as you readjusted yourself. “I shouldn’t have cheated.”
“I shouldn’t have played guessing games with a telepath. Neither of us had anything to do with my injuries.” You told her. “That’s down to those motherfuc-“
“I heard your thoughts, you wanted right so I took it.” She admitted in a rush like you were going to lash out at her. “I chose it because I didn’t want you to win.”
“Wanda.” You sighed. “What happened was just bad luck. I lived to tell the tale and now I’ll have some epic scars to show off.”
“You’ll attract all the ladies.” Wanda agreed, her hand reaching out to hover over trout right bicep when you were heavily bandaged.
“I only want the one. But she’s busy throwing a pity party despite the fact she didn’t even get shot.” You teased and she rolled her eyes, scooting her chair closer. “I don’t blame you.”
“You should. I got you shot.” She whispered, her finger tracing down your arm to the palm of your hand. You liked your fingers and held on tight, smiling through the ache in your body.
“I missed date night. Now we’re even.” You told her, trying to lift some of the tension weighing her shoulders down. “Wanda, come on.”
“There was so much blood when I found you.” She whispered. “I thought I’d killed you.”
“Hard to kill a bad thing.” You told her with a grin, tightening your grip on her hand. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“Promise?” She asked shakily.
“I promise. Now crawl in here beside me and get some sleep.” You shuffled to the side, wincing but persevering until you made room for her in the bed.
She chastised you and shook her head, refusing. You brought your free hand up to your bullet wound, finger poised over the bandage warningly. “I will literally dig my finger into my flesh if you don’t.”
“Jesus, fine!” Wanda clambered in next to you, avoiding all your wires and monitors. “You’re a brat.”
“You know it baby.” You teased, shuffling closer and pecking her lips quickly. “Now got to sleep before my nurse comes in and makes you move.”
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The Raven Haired Rebel
Pairing: Loki x reader
Series Summary: After invading New York, it was decided that, as a punishment, Loki would work for SHIELD. Yeah, right. After escaping from their custody and stranded on Midgard, the God of Mischief decides to prove he’s the one thing no one ever thought he was: the good guy. Now a vigilante, Loki attempts to make amends for his past wrongdoings while also evading the Avengers, including their newest member. You. Brought in specially for the case, you notice more and more details about the prince’s story don’t add up. When you get the chance to turn him in, will you listen to your employers or your heart that believes Loki’s done nothing wrong?
Chapter Summary: In which Loki enjoys his new life with you.
Chapter Warnings: none I believe
A/N: Thanks for coming along this little journey with me. Having been unsure of this story myself, I’m overwhelmed by the positive feedback it’s been getting! Happy reading :)
Permanent Tag List: @lucywrites02 @frostedficrecs @lunarmoon8 @twhiddlestonsstuff @lokistan @lowkeyorlokificrecs @gaitwae @whatafuckingdumbass @castiels-majestic-wings @kozkaboi @cozy-the-overlord @birdgirl90 @myraiswack @mythicalgarlicknot @what-a-flammable-heart @marvelouslovely @laurenandloki @fallinallinmendes @sophlubbwriting @mooncat163 @lokislittlesigyn @wolfish-trickster
RHR Tag List: @happygalaxymilkshake @electroma89 @stardust-walker @i-would-kneel-for-loki @fredweasleyandlokiaremylife @aestheticallyholland @loki-yoursaviourishere
Disclaimer: Gif not mine
Loki would never understand why they Norns blessed him with you, but he’d be forever grateful they did. That instant connection, that irresistible pull hadn’t faded at all. It only grew stronger, and drove his fear it was fluke further and further away every day. The kisses definitely helped too.
Moving into your apartment with you felt rather natural after having stayed in the motels together. You fell right back into your pattern, teasing and caring for each other, both in the most tender of ways. Waking up next to you still made him flustered, but he loved how the first thing you’d do was plant a kiss on his lips. Then you’d snuggle close to him and let him hold you, making him feel important to be allowed to wrap his arms around you. You, who were the only one to believe him. Believe in him. Truly, you were one of a kind.
He started having nightmares again. It’d been a while, but after what happened at the AIM base, he was tormented again. Now with the thought of you crumpling today the ground, his dagger buried in your flesh. It’d been an illusion, a necessary one, yet it still haunted him. He never told you the exact content of the dreams, but those were the times he let you hold him instead of the other way around. You’d always whisper sweet things in his ear until he calmed.
Right now you were snuggling on your couch, his arm around your waist while your head rested in the crook of his neck. He read a book as the TV played in the background, having grown accustomed to your habit and learned to tune out the noise. It was rather domestic, and Loki had been almost surprised to find out he liked it. Then again, any time spent with you was bound to be perfect, wasn’t it?
Today was your day off from work at the Avengers Tower. Loki would have been more than able to provide for the both of you, but you insisted that you wanted another job. As soon as Tony heard, he’d offered you one where you would help him figure out tech in the lab and monitor threats. Reluctantly, Loki had become friends with the man during the times he’d go and visit you at work.
Admittedly, the friendship was beneficial to Loki in more ways than one. During his time on the run, stopping crimes and saving people, he found he quite like helping others. You’d helped him find some charities he wanted to work with, and now he was establishing his own. With the help of Stark Industries, of course. They’d agreed almost immediately on helping kids in need, especially those who needed to be adopted or were in foster care. Loki had never much thought he’d want to raise a child of his own, but now he was wondering if he wanted to adopt. He’d mention it to you someday, but only if he was sure.
“Hey, Loki?” you said, breaking the comfortable silence between you, a smile already forming on your lips.
He put his book down immediately, giving you his full attention. Your eyes were still closed as you rested against him, and he took the opportunity to admire your beauty. “Yes, darling?”
“Have I told you yet today that I love you?”
The god chuckled. “Yes, you mentioned it.”
“Well, I’m telling you again anyway.” You finally lifted your head and looked him in his piercing blue-green eyes, cupping his cheek. “I love you.”
“And I you,” he replied, heavy emotion in his voice and shining eyes. “So, so much.”
He relished in the feel of your lips as you kissed him again. For a while he’d worried that he’d fallen for you to fast, that soon you’d not want him anymore, and he’d be heartbroken. Honestly, he still did sometimes. But it was in moments like this that those thoughts dissipated completely. The way you were pushing all the love you felt through to him by way of your connected lips, it made him feel reassured. Safe. You’d never doubted him, and that was so rare for someone like Loki.
Loki repositioned your bodies so he was over you, pecking little kisses along your jaw while you caught your breath. Just when he was about to recapture your lips, your computer chimed. You both sighed, but knew you had to check it in case Tony had blown something up in the lab and needed help again. Your brows knit together as you looked at the screen.
“Everything alright, darling?” he asked, peering over your shoulder at an encrypted message.
“There’s only one person I know who sends messages like that.”
And indeed, you were right; it was Fury. You and the trickster god read the message as you quickly sorted out the code. You were both being called in for another mission, despite having narrowly escaped being locked up. It was top secret, but he simply needed your talents for the case.
You turned to Loki with a smirk on your face. “What do you say? Ready to be done being rebel once and for all, and work with the law?”
“Perhaps,” he responded, pulling you back onto his lap “Though I still plan on doing things my own way.”
“I know,” you said. “And that’s why I love you.”
Before you could reply to the director, Loki began kissing you again, finishing what you’d started earlier. And for once in his life he didn’t care how anyone else saw him. Not when he had you. Not when he was finally perfectly and completely happy.
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learn to love
chapter 10 - silence
summary: steve and y/n don’t get along. now, they have to.
pairings: au!steve rogers x fem!reader
warnings: swearing, angst
a/n: 1k words short but not sweet. not edited
steve and y/n departed the following day at noon. she had spent the night in his arms, reveling in his warmth. his fingers had danced up and down her skin, long after she fell asleep. he lay awake in thought, wondering what had been plaguing her mind, before he was finally lulled into a dreamless sleep.
y/n had kept to herself the whole morning as she packed up their belongings. she put on a front while they were with his family, but a stifling silence settled over them once they hit the road. she leaned her head against the window. the morning had started off sunny but clouds had rolled in.
he didn’t know what to say to her, so he kept sneaking glances at her. her hair was pulled away from her face and the remnants of last night’s makeup was smudged under her eyes. periodically, she would yawn. “let me know if you want to stop for food or something,” he broke the silence, at last. she hummed back.
halfway through the journey, he had enough with the silence. he wanted an excuse to hear her voice. he yearned to be teased by her, to listen to her laugh, to hear her complain. he felt agitated, feeling as though he lost something and could not find it no matter where he looked. he took an off ramp and felt her gaze on him. “where are we going?” she asked.
“i want some coffee. do you?” he replied. his heart swelled. here was his chance to make conversation.
she pondered his question for a moment before answering, “yeah. i’m tired.”
“didn’t sleep good?” he felt anxiety blooming in his chest, as if he was in high school and speaking to his crush.
she shook her head. “no, did you?”
“no,” he briefly looked at her with a small close-lipped smile. his nervousness resolved into tranquility. they were finally talking.
“do you want me to drive?” she offered.
“i think i’ll be fine, doll,” he sighed, pulling into the drive-thru. “what’s your order?”
after ordering and receiving their drinks, the pair was back on the road. she took a taste of her coffee and hummed in satisfaction. “that’s really good.”
“yeah? can i try?” she passed it to him and watched his reaction carefully as he brought the cup to his pink lips. he nodded his head in approval. “i like it,” he handed it back.
“it’s only fair that i try yours,” she exchanged her drink for his, which was nestled in the cup holder between them.
“i haven’t even had it yet,” he chuckled.
“you snooze you lose, rogers.”
he smiled to himself. her usual countenance had returned and he was relieved.
after sampling it she told him, “mine is better.” she took another sip of his.
“then don’t drink all of mine!”
“hey, i never said it tasted bad.”
the silence returned, but this time it was comfortable. she stealthily would sip on his coffee, but he could see her do so out of the corner of his eye. he didn’t mind at all.
they were ten minutes away when steve finally worked up the courage to breach the silence and ask what he had wanted for the whole drive. “so,” he began but paused to clear his throat. his hand grew clammy and he switched them so that he could wipe it on his jeans. “you know how i feel about you, now. i mean what i said last night.”
she stiffened, bracing herself for what she knew what he was gonna say.
“do you feel the same way?”
she didn’t reply for a moment, fidgeting with her hands as she attempted to grasp for the words that evaded her. “oh i don’t know, steve. it was all just an act, you know,” she blurted. she knew instantly that she had said the worst thing she could’ve said.
“what?” his voice cracked with pain. his mind raced as he put together the pieces of their time together. she hadn’t explicitly stated her feelings for him but her actions dictated otherwise. “you kissed me.”
she swallows the lump in her throat. this was the hill she was going to die on. she firmly believed it was for the better as she could not fathom how she could ever be enough for him. she couldn’t stand to look at him and face the pain she was causing from her deception. her eyes were glued on the road ahead of them. they were almost at her apartment. “i was drunk. you know how i get,” her voice wavered but he didn’t catch it.
everything that he had done and said while in boston, had all been derived from his feelings toward her. deep down, he thought she had felt something towards him. he thought that they had an unspoken thing. his mouth opened and closed a few times as disbelief drew his mind a blank. “it didn’t mean anything to you?”
“other than some cash, no,” she winced as she lied, her hands balling into fists to keep them from shaking.
“and a date,” he spat. she spared a glance at him. he was gripping the wheel with two hands, knuckles white. his cheeks were rosy, and though his words dripped with venom, his expression betrayed his heartbreak.
“and a date,” she echoed. tears brimmed her eyes, feeling her heart twist and nausea brew in the pit of her stomach. she had honestly forgotten about the promised date with thor.
“good to fucking know,” he grumbled.
she didn’t respond. the silence was suffocating and y/n put all of her energy into not gasping for air. in the process of keeping him away from her, she had torn his heart in two and she couldn’t stand it. she wanted to scream but couldn’t fill her lungs with enough air.
he pulled up to the curb outside of her building and stormed out of the car. she gathered her belongings and stepped out. he took her suitcase out of the trunk and placed it in front of her, refusing to look at her. “steve-” she began as he walked back towards the car, but he cut her off.
“send me a venmo request.” he entered his car, peeled away from the curb, and left her.
she allowed the tears to finally fall down her face.
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Broken Things to Mend
Part 1 of 1
Word Count: 5998
A soulmate au where you have the first sentence your soulmate will say to you tattooed on your body in their handwriting.
TW: Abuse, neglect and starvation mentions (I’m sure theres more pls let me know if I need to add anything)
You were roughly thrown into a cell and the door shut behind you with a snap, exhausted you fall to your knees and stay on the floor rather than trying to fight your way back out. You were tired, so, so tired. Your body ached, cuts and bruises littered every inch of your skin, mere hours ago you had felt invincible but now you were nothing but broken. You collapsed to your knees and cried on the floor wondering how you had fallen so far.
Here you were locked in a cell on Asgard, and here was where you were going to stay until the humans had something properly set up to contain you. Why you had tried to take over that planet you weren't quite sure, tired of feeling weak had lead you down a dark path. A path from which you couldn't return, and had been regretting as you walked down it. But you couldn't stop yourself and now it was too late.
Broken was the only way to describe yourself, you had been broken for millennia and had finally thought you could piece yourself back together when you'd found the infinity stone. The power stone. You'd thought yourself strong enough to use its power, to stop those who had hurt you and others who wanted to hurt innocents in their paths. You had soon found you weren't strong enough, you were alone and it had corrupted your mind, having no one to anchor you to reality. That's when he had shown up. The purple Titan set on reforming the universe, making it a better place, and in your broken state of mind his plan had made sense, you had agreed to help him, to take out the biggest threat in his way.
You had failed, you had lost to that group called the Avengers and soon enough Thanos would be coming after you himself to remove any loose ends. You weren't the first he had sent but you were most likely the last he'd send on their own without him to lead them directly. He'd only kept you because you were able to hold the power stone in your hands and not be destroyed, someone broken who he could control who could keep the stone safe until he was able to wield it himself.
As soon as he'd seen you failing to take earth he had taken the stone from you and left you for dead. Once you were no longer in possession of the gem you had come back to your senses, seen all the havoc you'd wreaked upon that innocent planet. But it was too late, you were already the enemy and they'd never understand if you tried to explain. So you had fought, continuing to try and protect yourself and your life until they had finally overcome you.
Now you were sitting in a cell, back to yourself but now shattered rather than having just a few chips on your broken soul. You'd ben controlled and manipulated your entire life, by those who claimed to be your friends and family, but it was only ever for the power which you had. Seemingly the last of your species, dark and wraith-like nothing more than a wisp of what you could be and easy to control. A child who could wield the power of the infinity stones, any powerful person would want you in their control.
All of that manipulation had left you more than a little broken, to the point that as soon as you had actually been able to get your hands on that gem you'd instantly turned on them. Then you'd gone after all the others who had manipulated you and dictated your life. You'd been passed from hand to hand as a slave would be, malnourished to keep a leash on you. Sometimes you were sold, other times traded, but mostly those who had been holding you were attacked and killed so that somebody new could control you.
Despite having wielded the infinity stone less than a day before you were back to that state you had been in. The stone had been the only thing sustaining your life and making you seem to be anything more than someone who'd been a broken child and was now a broken adult. You fall asleep on your place on the floor in that cell on Asgard, you were powerless to do anything and you knew it, sleeping was the only way you'd be able to ignore the crushing guilt you felt for all you had done.
All too soon you're woken up, the drapes over the glass door of your cell being opened wide and exposing you to the glaring lights. You preferred the dark as any wraith would, it was your natural state to be in the dark, so natural that the light almost hurt. Once you're awake you look over your thin arms and legs, the bruises and cuts from the fight before all healed, thats why they'd opened the drapes, you'd had enough time to heal in the dark but they didn't want to leave you in the dark. The darkness brought you power, not as much power as that gem had, and not as Much as any sort of nutrients would but it had allowed you to heal.
After your eyes finish lingering on the elegant script on your forearm you pull your sleeve to cover it and look up. Across the hallway was another cell, this one containing a raven haired man, his gaze fixed on you and not breaking even when you meet his stare with your own. He looks to be in good shape and everyone else there would think so as well, but you were able to see the haze of magic over his room. You couldn't see through it, you didn't know what he was hiding but there was something he was keeping from prying eyes and you could only applaud him for being able to protect himself in such a way.
Loki had looked up from his book when the drapes across the prison hall were drawn away from the cell they'd been covering from his view. Inside was a person most unusual, a wisp of a being, with grayish skin and sunken eyes which had seen so many things. What were they? He asked himself, intrigued as he'd never seen anything like them before. He's surprised when they meet his eyes and don't look away immediately as anyone else would. The few moments of eye contact are brief as the figure gets up off the floor and seemingly drifts over to their cot.
Peculiar, a long dark robe covered their grayish form, ending a foot or so from the ground revealing no legs or feet touching the floor. There was a faint cloud of dark mist that seemed to surround them, which pooled around where their feet should have been. This was their natural form, no magic concealed who they were as he did with himself. He watches as they take a seat on their cot, the mist around them gathers and forms some spindly legs. Intriguing, now that he had seen that he couldn't unsee it, their entire form seemed to be made of mist, there but not really there, but by the way they sat thy definitely has a solid form in there somewhere.
You'd moved to your cot, hoping that movement would break the stranger's eye contact but when you sat and turned around his gaze was still fixed on you. You hated being perceived, anytime someone looked at you there was a thirst to their gaze, a desire as they wanted to own you. His gaze was different though, more curious than wanting to control you. It eased you ever so slightly, but you still hated it, so you stared back.
Most wouldn't hold your gaze for long before breaking it, they found you horrible to look at with your grey skin and sunken eyes. You weren't always like that though, when you'd had the power stone you had found your true form, what you'd look like if you had been properly taken care of and healthy. Even then, in your true form, people wouldn't hold your gaze, you were no longer the disgusting monster you were currently but they could see the inside. Your grace and power which flowed off of you in that form intimidated them and they'd look away, but this man didn't.
You stare back at him, allowing yourself to break eye contact knowing intimidation and fear would get him to stop, so let him look at the monster you were. You were the most horrible creature someone could set eyes on in their lifetime, if he wanted the sight of you burned into his retina who were you to stop him? So instead you take your own turn to observe him, taking in his features, taking time to notice more than just the raven hair that flowed to his shoulders. His emerald eyes were the first thing which you noticed besides the hair, but it wasn't so much the color that intrigued you it was the pain and loathing you could sense behind them. He did well to hide it but not from you, you had seen that look in your own eyes too many times to not recognize it.
Who knows how long the two of you spend staring at each other across that hallway, but you both allow it to go on. Him, intrigued by never having seen anything like you before and you staring as the face before you feels familiar. You hadn't spent much time around other beings, recognizing faces was not your strong suit but picking a voice out of a crowd was easy. Finally you place it, you place him. A face you'd seen many times in your nightmares. He was the one Thanos called Laufeyson, the one who had gone before you to earth to try and take over. The other one who had failed. The other one Thanos would come after in his rage. The other loose end was sitting there across the hallway from you.
For some reason the fact that he was also here brought you peace, it brought you hope. Maybe, just maybe he had also been controlled. Maybe he would back you up and make an attempt of explaining who Thanos was and what his plans were worth it. But you could be wrong. He could have done nearly the same thing you did but all of his own accord. He could've enjoyed hurting those people.
It was that thought that prevented you from trying to talk to him through the glass. You keep quiet except for when you're being questioned, then you give nothing but honest answers and they aren't believed so you're questioned again and again, tortured and punished for what they take to be lies. At least they allow you to sit in the dark after you're through with the torture, only long enough to heal, but it's long enough to bring you some solace and block the prying eyes.
The constant pain wasn't anything new to you, everyone who had kept you before this had done the same thing if only for different reasons. They had been scared of you, wanted to hurt you to keep you weak, the Asgardians though, were not scared of you. They wanted information and not to keep you on death's door, so their torture was nothing to you.
It becomes routine for you, one day of torture, one day of darkness and one day of nothing before the cycle begins again. One day you find yourself waiting for the guards to come get you, able to guess nearly down to the minute they would arrive each time, but today they don't come. Why they don't come you haven't a clue, until an hour later when a soldier comes storming down the stairs and the man across the hall gives him directions to somewhere.
Then after more hours pass then another guard, this one a guard of Asgard comes down the staircase and talks to the man across the hall. You watch as the magic haze over his room flickers before steadying out once more, whatever he had just been told upset him, and you could only hope it wasn't Thanos coming for the two of you.
The next morning you gain somewhat of an answer, the broad shouldered blond comes down and speaks to the raven haired man, Thor you believed his name was. He was one of the heroes who had protected earth from you. You're surprised when Loki's illusion is lifted from his cell, revealing the state he is in along with all of the broken furniture that had seemed pristine moments earlier. Then even more surprisingly Thor opens up the cell to release him before turning to face you and making your glass cell wall melt away as well.
"You are a wraith, yes?" he ask and you merely nod.
"A wraith you say?" Loki asks, his curiosity piqued once again by you.
"Brother, I need your help to watch her, she tried to take over Midgard as well, but we need her help," then Thor shoots you a look, questioning silently if you'd help.
You couldn't help but wonder how stupid he was as you nod, signaling you would help. He didn't know you, you were nothing but a monster so how could he so willingly trust you? His hand resting on your shoulder startles you, "very well, Wraith, I can see there is good in you-"
"Even with all those people I killed?" You ask, breaking your silence.
"Yes, I have heard the reports from the guards. You've remained steady in your story that you were manipulated into doing all of that and at this time we need all the help we can get and I'm willing to take the chance," he responds confidently.
You nod, once again, thoroughly confused but willing to follow him and his brother through the halls of the palace until you meet with a woman. "Loki, Wraith, this is Jane Foster- the dark elves are here because of her, the aether as fused with her body and they are trying to take her and destroy the nine realms."
"Are you serious Thor? You think that we stand a chance against the might of the dark elves?" Loki asks, irridiculously with a glance in your direction.
"We do, we have you brother and Jane is stronger than she seems," he tries to rest a hand on Loki's shoulder but the other man dodges the hand.
"What does the Wraith have to do with it?"
"When she tried taking over Midgard she carried the power stone in her hands and did not crumble to dust. The aether is much like the power stone and she should be able to protect it from the elves-"
"And you're just going to trust the fate of the nine realms to two criminals?" Loki asks, sounding like he just wants to argue.
"Yes. We must be getting out of here though," Thor says once again with that same confidence.
He leads the group of the four of you through the halls of the palace, taking some sudden turns and winding your way about until you come to an odd looking ship which he has all of you get in before he starts it up and begins flying all of you out of Asgard to who knows where. Once in the ship Loki turns his attention to you for the millionth time and you, as always, maintain eye contact. For some reason Loki's frustrations seem focused on you as he turns once more to Thor, "you've heard tales of the Wraiths and their power how can you trust this one so easily?!" he sounds outraged.
You turn away from him and take a deep breath, despite not having a reaction to all of the torture the sound of him yelling terrified you more than anything. So many times you'd been shouted at then beaten, scolded then thrown in a room lit so brightly it burned your skin. You needed to focus, try and figure out if Thor was being truthful in his trust of you, or if he was trying a different tactic of manipulating you. All you knew he was telling the truth about was that the woman, Jane, has an infinity stone bonded to her and it is slowly killing her.
You don't even realize that she has taken a seat next to you where you have your head in your hands and tried offering words of comfort. You shake your head, "no, Loki is right, it is foolish of Thor to trust me. I'm a monster who has never left anything but pain and destruction in my path. It may not have been my choice to attack earth but I was so filled with pain that I allowed it to happen and even if I can contain the power of the Aether I do not know how it will effect my mind."
"Useless," Loki spits at you.
Then you stand up, feeling anger as you face him, "I know who you are Loki. Thanos is coming for you just like he is coming for me because we failed to take down his enemies, do not act as though you are better than me, the power stone corrupted my mind because I am weak but I was never given a chance until now to do good and I am taking it even if you doubt me. I've learned the hard way I don't need other's approval."
You were going to continue but it is at this point you realize Loki's expression has changed from one of nearly disgust to shock. His masks had fallen down as he stares at you and you glance at Thor who is also looking at you in shock and by the time you're back to Loki his expression is stone cold once more. "What did you say?" he asks in a low tone.
You'd thought his shout had been bad but this terrified you so much more, he was far too calm. You take a shaky breath and say, more gently this time, "Thanos sent me when you failed. I was easy to manipulate because the power stone took ahold of my mind and he used that, I wouldn't doubt if he did the exact same thing to you-"
"Not that-" he says, that angered tone returning as he snatches your right wrist and lifts your sleeve to reveal your soul mark on your forearm. There, shining gold and beautiful against your grey skin was one word, "Useless."
A much as he hated to admit it the Wraith intrigued him, but the part that hurt, the part that made him feel angered towards them was that Thor had so easily trusted them, a complete stranger. Loki and Thor had been brothers, and sure Thor was an idiot for trusting Loki to help with this situation but him showing trust to a total stranger in the same minute he'd offered a second chance to Loki stung.
This is why he questions Thor, why he snaps at you, it's all a test to see if you truly could be trusted. You much like he had had tried to take over Midgard, you could be a good ally but with the situation at hand how could he know he could trust you. So he pushed, working quickly to find what things set you off, what things got you to break the state of silence you were always in.
He had found it, the one thing that made you angered enough to lash out was him spitting that single word at you. Your reaction had surprised him, how quickly you'd been on your feet and in his face. How your entire countenance shown with a deeply hidden power that it seemed even you were unaware of. But the part that surprised him the most were the words that left your lips as you faced him.
"I know you Loki." You hadn't said it with malice, but as a fact, now you knew him he hadn't a clue. He's in too much shock to hear the next words you say, stating how you won't be useless any longer.
He quickly masks his face once again when he realizes you had stopped speaking. He can't stop the hint of anger that crept into his tone. He was far from angry now, but anger was the only thing that kept anyone from getting close enough to him to see through his walls, "what did you say?" he asks in a low voice.
He sees the hesitation in your eyes as you go to respond, "Thanos sent me when you failed. I was easy to manipulate because the power stone took ahold of my mind and he used that, I wouldn't doubt if he did the exact same thing to you-"
"Not that-" he says but doesn't have the patience to explain. He catches your right wrist in his hand and lifts your sleeve to reveal your soul mark. He doesn't realize that his masks once again drop before you as he stares at the elegant script that covered your forearm. His cold finger runs gently over the word written on your soul, "useless," the first word he had uttered to the one who was his soulmate.
It's as his index finger runs over the mark on your arm that you realize what he has said. The first word he had spoken directly to you, the one that had brought you hope in some of your darkest moments, the one that had also broken you completely, even your soulmate thought you were useless. You can't help it as you snatch your arm away from him, how dare he- How dare he call you useless then stare at your soul mark- Even if he was your soulmate.
You're surprised when he actually lets you walk away to the other end of the ship without stopping you. Your heart is pounding in your chest as you stare at those beautiful yet painful letters on your arm, somewhere in the back of your mind you register Thor and Jane having a whispered conversation. Without turning around you know that Loki hadn't moved from his place and was still staring at your back, damn him why did he have to be like this.
You had only shared looks across that hallway for months, you'd never done anything to warrant him being rude to you in this way and now, knowing as well as he did that your souls were linked hurt. If you weren't already so broken you're sure it would have broken you more, would have been the final straw to tear you apart... There isn't time for you to dwell on that as the ship rocks back and forth, coming into contact with the turbulence of an atmosphere, you were landing and it was time for you to take your chance to do something good with your life. With that thought in your mind you pull your sleeve down to cover your arm again and turn to stride past Loki to the front of the ship.
Loki could only gaze after you when you walked away, he recognized a broken soul when he saw one, it was what he saw in the mirror everyday. He had seen the disdain and hurt in your eyes as you ripped your arm away from his grasp, and knowing you were the one he was meant to spend his life with, the one most likely to love him back and he had already hurt you. The feeling was so much worse than any torture that Thanos could think to inflict upon him.
When they were going in for a landing and you strode past him without a glance it was like a punch in the gut. He had ruined any chance he had of gaining you favor in less than and hour, just because he had to play stupid, stupid, mind games. He just had to try and push your buttons and test you as he always did with anyone he saw a possibility of being useful.
You look at Jane for a moment before gently resting your hand on her shoulder, "I'm going to try and take the aether from you..." you glance at Thor, "if I loose control I want you to do whatever it takes to keep me from hurting more people even if it means killing me." You make eye contact with him for a few moments before asking, "can you please promise me this?" You ask in barely more than a whisper, letting your shields down for once as you ask, you don't care you just don't want anyone to use you anymore.
"I will promise you Wraith, I will not let you bring harm to anyone else," Thor says confidently, though you do notice his glance at Loki.
That allows you to relax, you take your time as you come to a landing on the red desert planet below you to focus your attention on taking the Aether out of the human. By the time you all land you've been able to take it from her it's power flowing through you. This stone is much more subtle than the power stone, you're able to keep control of your own mind when the reality stone latches itself to you.
Loki can only watch as you take the Aether from Jane, hearing you didn't care how Thor stopped you only confirmed his fear he had scared you off with his childish games. Nevertheless as he watches he's amazed with the transformation your body goes through as you harness the power of the infinity stone.
Your grayish skin changes to a more human color, your body fills out, your wispy figure disappearing. The years of abuse disappearing from your form, revealing your true beauty and the confidence someone with your abilities should. He can only stand in awe of you and your appearance as you turn to then step off the ship onto the desert planet.
When he hesitates to follow Thor walks over to him and puts a hand on his shoulder, "brother, it is not too late. You can see through lies, you would know if all that the Wraith has said is true or not. They are clearly as broken as you are, Brother, but they are willing to change. I'm sure that if you do, they also hold forgiveness in their heart." Thor gives him a firm pat on the shoulder as he turns to also leave the ship, "now let us go, and defeat the dark elves before they can take the Aether."
You stand and can see the ship of the Dark Elves' in the distance. If this was your end then so be it, you could finally rest with peace knowing you had aided Thor as some level of recompense for the damage you had caused. Jane comes to stand next to you, breathing deeply as she gently says, "thank you."
"I'm just glad that I am able to help the universe in some way," you respond, your eyes can't help but linger for a moment on her soul mark, on her right forearm where everyone's was. Part of you hoped that Loki wasn't your soulmate, it was only one word and not specific enough to guarantee anything, but you knew that wasn't the case, with the way he had reacted you knew the words on his arm were the first that left your lips when speaking to him.
"I know that you will," Jane says, removing you from your thoughts.
Thats when Thor makes his way down to the two of you, "Jane, you stay here but not on the ship, it is where you will be safest."
"Thor I am not going to just sit back and watch all of this happen, I might not be as powerful as the rest of you but I will be doing my part."
Thor can only nod, and you can see the fond smile he has on his face as he looks at her, "very well, but as soon as the convergence begins I will be placing you back on earth to do your part there." With that he leads the way towards the other ship, not waiting to see if his brother would be joining them. It would be very helpful to have the trickster at their side during this but after the words which had been spoken it made sense that Loki would need a moment.
As you walk Thor asks you if you know what you are capable of. "No, I don't I have been told of the things I can do as a Wraith but I have been kept subdued my entire existence so I haven't learned anything more that what you saw on earth... But I do have control of my own mind at this time," you add trying to make sure he wouldn't misunderstand you.
"It will be enough," he says and once again places a hand on your shoulder, but quickly removes it when you flinch. The group of twenty or so Dark Elves stand a few hundred feet in front of you when Thor speaks again, raising his voice to shout, "Malekith! Today is the day you meet your end, I will not allow you to destroy the nine realms."
"Thor," Malekith responds with a eerie smile on his face, "I thank you for delivering the Aether to me, unfortunately you won't be around to see the realms brought to perfection." It's with that that he points a finger towards your group, signaling for his followers to attack you.
Everything happening flies past, much like it had on earth, you fight alongside Thor using the power of the Aether to aid you, but then you come face to face with Malekith. The Elf has some sort of hold over the Aether and by extension you, he lifts you into the air and begins to take the Aether from you. No matter how you struggle you can feel not just the Aether but also your life slipping away from you, he wasn't taking just the infinity stone but all the power your weak body held. You try and fight, and try to hold on but before it your vision goes black.
You didn't expect too but you're able to open your eyes again hours later, the Aether has left you so you are back to your grey wispy form but your body doesn't ache as badly as you had expected. This planet was dark so it made sense, you'd been able to heal yourself in the shadows. You sit up, your eyes already adjusted to the dark, but just now noticing that there was nothing on the planet around you. There was some rubble of the ship nearby but besides that nothing, no Dark Elves, no Thor, no Jane. You were alone and how exactly you felt about that you weren't sure, you'd never been left so completely alone before.
Your reaction comes slowly, you can only assume that since you are alive you had done your part but it doesn't stop you from crying as suddenly everything sets in. You'd been able to do something good with your life, finally, but as you always had you'd left a trail of loss and destruction behind you. Sure, it was fine the Elves were gone but Thor and Jane had abandoned you here, on purpose or not was unclear. Though, the thing that hurt the most was that you had met your soulmate and you had instantly pushed him away, just for him to do the same. Sure, he had hurt you but you turning your back so quickly once you realized had to have hurt him as well and now you were on this barren planet where you'd eventually die of starvation.
You sit up as you let the tears roll down your cheeks, your hand naturally grasping at the floor for any sort of stability. You're shocked when you don't find that though, you lift your hand to your tear filled eyes and look at the dirt filling your palm. You were outside for one of the few times in your life and something about that calmed your tears, they were still present but weren't flowing as freely. You continued to let the feeling of dirt running through your fingers to ground you, you were finally free even if- no don't think about the long slow death awaiting you here just enjoy the fact that you are free that you could stand up right now and take off running without anyone hunting you down. Thats it- thats what you'll do, you'll run for the first time in centuries and just let the wind blow around you. You stand up, wiping the tears from your cheeks as you take a shaky breath, let out an excited laugh and look ahead of you.
Standing in front of you is him, Loki. You hadn't noticed he was there, how much he had seen of you crying on the ground you had no idea but the fact that he was there created a strange sensation in your chest. "I- Loki I didn't-"
Once again he cuts you off but this time it's much gentler, "no, I need to apologize. I've been captivated by you since the moment I first laid eyes on you then when we were finally able to speak I lashed out with childish games, Wraith-"
It's your turn to cut him off, "my name isn't actually Wraith, it's y/n," you pause and decide to extend an olive branch of your own, "you can just call me y/n."
"Y/n," he says thoughtfully, letting the name flow off of his silver tongue, and once again that strange tightening sensation strikes your chest. "That is a lovely name, y/n," he concludes.
You bite on the tip of your tongue as you look at him for a moment, "I need to apologize as well. I walked away from you without giving you a chance to explain yourself. I know we are little more than strangers and you calling my trustworthiness into question is only logical."
He seems a bit taken aback by your honesty but he smoothly take your hand in his, lifting your sleeve once more to look at your soul mark. "Would you be willing to give me a second chance to make up for my mistake? I have a feeling we are both broken and bruised, similar yet different with much to learn."
You cant stop the small smile that tugs at your lips. You take your hand back from his and take ahold of his right arm, taking your turn to lift his armored sleeve and view the words written there in gold, "I know you Loki," you read them out loud then meet his eyes once more, "I'd be happy to give you a second chance as you call it, as long as you are willing to give me one as well."
The relief behind his eyes is clear to you, but what isn't clear is why he cups your cheeks in his hands. He gently wipes away any remaining tears on your face, "of course I will give you a second chance," he states it gently, but firmly and once again your chest tightens. It was then that he made his intentions with his hands on your cheeks clear, as he used them to pull you into a cautious kiss, that becomes more sure when you return it.
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A Therapists Personal Logs: First Session
This is a bucky x reader series where the reader is his new therapist. This series takes place shortly after the events of Falcon and the Winter Solider.
A special thanks to @alcacira for the idea for this story and helping me edit it.
Here is the link for my master list
Warnings: None for now
Word count: 3058
Taglist: @erikphantomskellington @dreamer821 @alcacira @destiel-stucky4ever-loki-queen @stucky-my-ship
June 12, 2024
Today was interesting, to say the least. It was my first day under a government contract as a therapist, not only that but my first and my only patient is James “Bucky” Buchanan Barnes. We didn’t really do any therapy exercises or anything of the sort, rather I took today to try to get to know James. After all, the only reason why I am here is that his previous therapist wasn’t really cutting it out. We managed to work out a schedule and alternate ways of therapy should he be on a mission or unavailable during one of our scheduled meetings. I figured I should let him set the pace, the recovery can only go as fast as the patient wants or as fast as they can take it. And for someone who is an ex-assassin and an Avenger he was EVERYWHERE.
I sat in my office reading my book, it was a cheesy romance book, but a good one nonetheless. My windows were wide open letting in sunlight since I found those office lights annoying. Not only that but the natural sunlight and fresh air were good for the copious amounts of plants that decorated my office. Scattered through my office were pots of various flora.
Near the patients, seats were a mix of my smaller plants that I grew or purchased at the florist down the street. An array of goldenrods, hollyhocks, coriander, and lemon balm decorated the area but were still potted so if the pollen or aroma bothered the patient I could always move it. On and around my desks were morning glories, sage, and some thyme. I used sage and thyme to cleanse my office space before and after each patient visit. It’s something that I’ve always done when working with others on personal things, even my closest friends. Cleaning the energy of the room is just as important as physically cleaning up.
As it was ten minutes before the patient was supposed to get here, I took a small portion of pre-picked leaves on my desk and placed them on my incense plate. Once the leaves were lit and started to smoke, I walked through my office space with the plate in hand taking in tiny details of my office. The smell of the sage and thyme filled my nose as I took my mini-tour through the office. My office was on the first floor of this large sky-scraper of a building, but it was isolated on the south corner of the building. Luckily, the door to the left of my office was an employee entrance and exit that led to the park outside my open window.
Once I felt as though the room was cleaned, I put out the smoke on the plants and placed the plate back in its locked draw away from prying eyes. I gazed at the clock on my desk and saw I had five minutes left to set up my space for my patient.
I already knew who he was, James Buchanan Barnes. He’s a World War II veteran who was brainwashed by a terrorist organization and later became an avenger, not only that but recently he stopped the flag smashers. He probably has enough trauma for twenty different lives, but that’s for me to tackle another day. Today’s goal is just to get to know one another and see what he is comfortable talking about…. That being if he is comfortable talking about anything.
In my patient section of the room, the layout was simple. Two white loveseat sofas sat across from one another as a simple black coffee table set a barrier. On the coffee table, I set three cold water bottles and some snacks I was able to find that were around in world war 2. Surprisingly enough, a lot of those snacks are still around today, just with a recipe that changes as the decades progressed. Sticking with simple snacks, I placed a plate full of Ritz Crackers and a bowl of Tootsie rolls.
As I placed the bowl down a knock at the door drew my attention, I did one last scan of the room ensuring no documents were out and that everything was neat before heading to the door. I opened the door to see a man at least a foot taller than me, it was Mr.Barnes. Now I knew he was tall but the height difference caught me slightly off guard. “Good afternoon, you must be Mr. Barnes.”
“Yes ma’am that’s me, you don’t have to call me Mr. Barnes you can call me James.” I stepped out of the doorway to let him in and waved towards the sofas. His voice was rough and kind but still had some annoyance behind it. Understandably he probably doesn’t want to be here.
“If you don’t mind having a seat James, make yourself at home and we can get started.” As he took off his leather jacket and rested it over the sofa’s arm, I grabbed his file from my desk along with a notebook that would be used to take notes during and after our session. Each patient I saw had their own book and their own file, he would be no different.
“Okay James, so I wanted to use today to figure out a schedule that will work for you given that sometimes you will be out of the city and alternatives to days that you can’t make it to your appointments. I also wanted to ask some questions to make sure my files have all the right information and I can learn a little bit about you. Is that okay with you?”
He scratched the back of his neck and answered with a short nod, and then off into work I went. After verifying I had the right basic information like date of birth, allergies, and medical conditions, I asked if he had any personal goals to work on. “They can be anything from the smallest thing like listening to new music, to the largest goals you can think of. And if you don’t have anything right now that’s okay.”
His blue eyes scanned the room as he sat in silence. “There are two that I have, the first one is to be able to sleep in my bed, and the second is to find and make some recipes from before the war.” I wrote those goals down in his journal. “I’ve actually found a few but they aren’t right, there's something off with them.” James kept his gloved hands intertwined while rubbing them against one another.
The issues with sleep on the bed were nothing new. I’ve worked with a plethora of soldiers and veterans and they’ve all compared it to sleeping on a marshmallow. One patient even compared it from sleeping like a caveman on hard rocks to going onto a surface that makes you feel like you’re gonna sink. That was definitely a long-term goal. The recipes, on the other hand, could be a quick fix.
“That depends on where you found it and what you made it with. A lot of stuff is factory-made and filled with preservatives nowadays and that changes the flavors in the recipes. Also, a lot of recipes from back then online tend to be modernized so some key elements may have been changed.”
“Noted.” He looked down at the plate in front of him. “Could I have some?”
He took out a tootsie roll and popped it in his mouth. “Did you know that they used to have these back in the forties?” I knew but feigned ignorance. “They would hand these out to us when we were overseas as a snack. It was one of the few candies that wouldn’t melt when they shipped it out. Surprisingly they taste the same.”
“That’s good to know.” a small chuckle escaped my lips, “So tell me about yourself, anything you're comfortable with sharing, it doesn’t have to be anything too personal.”
James took a swig of water from the water bottle, he claimed: “There’s nothing much really, I was a soldier in the second world war, got kidnapped, made into a monster, my best friend found and somewhat rehabilitated me, I became an Avenger, and now I’m here. But that’s probably on your file already.” He pointed at the file cast away to the left of me. He wasn’t wrong. What details weren’t on my file, I heard from my superiors who contracted me.
“While yes they are there, I prefer to hear information from my patients, not others who want to tell the story. Other people have biases and agendas, you are the source of your story. So, the only person I care to hear details from is you.” While talking I could see that his hand was moving a lot even when he was silent. It made sense that he didn’t like to stay still for too long.
Looking at my watch I saw we still had an hour and forty minutes left. I stood up and walked to my desk. “We are going to go on a little field trip.” I grabbed the keys for my office, my wallet, and my keys to the employee entrance.
I looked to see James staring back at me in confusion. “I thought therapy was done in an office and you’re supposed to ask me questions I don’t want to answer.”
“That will only make us frustrated for two hours and no one likes that. So today, we are going on a field trip. You might want to bring the water with you.” I grabbed my water bottle and headed towards the door to see James with his jacket on, was already there holding the door open. “Thank you.”
As we walked down the corridor to the employee’s entrance, I opened the door and led him towards the park. “You don’t like my office, so let's go somewhere a little more open.”
“It’s not that I don’t like your office, I just don’t like offices. Yours has been the best one I’ve been in so far.”
“Thank you, I think, wellpoint being we are going on a field trip today.” I led him through the public garden outside of the building. “So do you have any hobbies or anything you do just for fun?”
“Does pulling pranks on a co-worker count?”
“Depends, are they funny?”
“There’s your answer, but do you have anything that you like to do on your own?” We walked in silence as he pondered the question. As we walked, I noticed that the clear summer sky had been invaded with some dark storm clouds. There wasn’t any wind or anything. He looked at the ground and sighed.
“No, none that I can think of.”
I nodded and took note of that, making a plan to make a list of hobbies he can try. “Okay, when you’re not Avengering, do you have a routine of sorts? Are there any places you like to go to?”
“Avengering?” James looked at me as we walked past a batch of purple larkspurs. “Well, when I’m off of work, I wake up, work out, have breakfast, do whatever I need to do for the day, have dinner, shower, and watch tv till I fall asleep.”
We continued the small talk and I got to know some information about him. He likes hot chocolate, his favorite movies are the hobbit and lord of the rings, and he goes to this Japanese restaurant with a man named Yori every Friday. As I was about to ask him my next question, the cloudy sky released a torrential downpour of rain. “Shit! I didn’t bring my umbrella!”
James had taken off his jacket and held it above our heads. “Let’s head back to the office?” The smell of cologne flooded my nose and it smelled amazing mixed with the warmth radiating from his body.
“Good idea.” Luckily we hadn’t been more than a half an hour stroll away from the office, which meant it was less than a five-minute sprint. Well, a sprint for me, a fast-paced walk for James.
Once I opened the employee side door and made it in, did I remember I left the windows in my office open. I took off running to my office and swung the door open to rush to the windows which were flailing about in the wind and rain. As I fought with one set of the four large windows, I failed to notice that James had rushed next to me and closed two sets of windows already. By the time I closed the one I was fighting with, James had conquered the other three. “Thank you, James.”
“No problem, but I think your floor may need some cleaning.” Along the side of the window, the floor was drenched.
“It’s just water, I’ll clean it up later.” Looking up at James, I noticed that not only were both of us soaked to the bone but that his shirt clung tight to his body. “Give me a second to turn on the heater in the room, I should also have some towels in the storage behind you if you want one.”
Turning my back to him, I tried to shut off the little perverted thought that came wandering through my mind. I fought with the heater until I a click ran through the office and the machine began to whir to life. Making my way back to the couch, I saw James had grabbed an extra towel and handed it to me once I sat on the couch.
For the next hour or so we went over different topics, jumping from subject to subject as he never wanted to delve deep into anything. I don’t know what it is about an office setting, but compared to when he was outside, James seemed to be closed off. He gave short generic answers but wasn’t rude at all. He even tried shifting the conversation onto topics about me. “Why did you become a therapist?”
I shifted under my towel to get comfortable. It was only fair for me to answer his questions. To build up some foundation of trust. “What do you mean?”
“Everyone goes into a job for a reason, why did you go into psychology?”
I sipped out of my water bottle. “Well, I’ve always found the brain and behavior to be something interesting. Finding out why people act the way they act and think the way they think has always been something I’ve had an interest in.”
James nodded his head. “Do you have any hobbies?”
“Trying to steal my hobbies, James?” He shrugged his shoulders and leaned forward to listen. “Well aside from gardening, I read books and like baking.”
“Have any recipes you would suggest?”
“I have a few that I can bring to our next session.” I looked at the clock on the wall and noticed we had about ten minutes left before our session was over.
“So our next appointment will be this week. Thursday at noon. Should you need to talk to me at any point in the time between sessions do not hesitate to call or text me.” I handed him my card with my number on it. “If I don't answer right away, I will call or text you back as soon as possible.”
He nodded and took the card. “Also if you can’t make it to the next session let me know at least twelve hours in advance. Even though this is court-mandated, I know you still have other things you need to do. If you can’t show up, we can either door the appointment over zoom or you can fill out some worksheets that should take no more than an hour.”
“Yes ma’am.”As he left I noticed more than a handful of tootsie rolls were missing from the jar. I shook my head as I cleaned up the coffee table and the remaining water by the window.
After I closed up the office, I opted to walk home rather than take the subway, for the sole reason of stopping at the bookstore that was in between the two subway stops. The store was a vintage book store, anything from first edition copies to legitimate cookbooks could be found. In the store, I made a beeline for the cookbooks section and picked three cookbooks, one based on the 1920s, one for the ’30s, and one for the ’40s. I knew this would help James with one of his goals, but it could also help him get a hobby.
Two things concerned me today when I was talking to him. One is the way he just spoke about his life as if he was bored and drifting from day to day. Granted nothing can be as exciting as being an Avenger, but there was this lack of interest and energy when talking about his daily life. The second concern that arose in me was James claiming he was a monster. I have a vague idea of what the winter soldier is and from what I’ve heard it wasn’t the best.
Walking home after purchasing the books, I began to make a game plan in my head. I had him every Monday and Thursday from noon to four. I knew I had to keep him engaged and willing to cooperate. Four hours is a lot for one session, but working with James' schedule and the Government's demands, that’s what we came to. I couldn’t go about this like I would with any other patient. With James, I was going to have to get creative.
Aside from the storm and the water mess, today was good. I learned a lot about James, the personal details were surface level, but he had a way of making it seem as if it was personal information. He was willing to work with me but didn’t trust me yet, understandably so. This is going to be my hardest case yet. Without a doubt.
Well, I have to go now, it’s nearing midnight and I have errands I need to run tomorrow. I'm still getting used to this city, while I miss my old home, there are some things I’m happy I left behind. Until next time, good night.
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Plot: The evolution of Thor and the readers relationship through sunflowers.
Pairing: Thor x Gen!Neutral Reader
Triggers: Brief mentions of fighting and drinking.
General Taglist: @criminaly-supernatural, @caswinchester2000
Marvel Taglist: @aquariuslavenderhoney, @trashywritestrash, @groovyfluxie, @marvelouslyme96, @supersourlemon13, @mochamoff, @simsiddy
*A combo of fluff, pining and angst.
**I obviously did not want to go through everything that happened in the movies, so I skipped around a lot.
The battle was over, the Chitauri had been defeated and Loki captured. This marked the first battle of the Avengers, and it certainly was a group of unique individuals.
You thought this as you looked around the table, watching as everyone ate at a different pace. Most slowly, or barely at all, and then there was Thor. The apparent Norse God, and brother of Loki. He was very strong, and quite handsome. Not to mention, he had one hell of an appetite.
You had fought side by side during one part of the battle, and he made some flirty remarks to you, which was definitely unexpected since he didn't really seem to trust most of you since he arrived. But he was growing on you quickly.
As you all slowly began to walk out of the trashed restaurant, you looked up and around at the harshly damaged city. As you took a few steps towards the street, the others beginning to group up with some SHIELD agents, you looked to the ground, a mess of color catching your eyes.
A flower cart was smashed to pieces, as were the dozens of flowers, now scattering the road. Crouching down, you picked up a smashed and tattered sunflower, twirling it around in your fingers.
"Are you alright L/n?" A deep voice said from behind you.
Turning your body, you looked up to see the concerned face of Thor looking down at you. You gave him a somewhat shy smile before standing and turning to him. His eyes fell to the flower in your hand
"It's just a shame is all." You said as you looked back at the numerous destroyed sunflowers, Thor following your gaze "There my favorite flower." You said simply before dropping the wilting bloom. You gave Thor a small smile before waking past him and towards the group.
Thor continued to stare at the flowers scattered around the road before turning to watch you leave. You had piqued his interest since he arrived to look for Loki. You were different than the others, kind, strong, and caring. Looking back to the flowers, his eyes catching on a single sunflower in near perfect shape, he smiled softly to himself.
- - -
You stood in the room waiting for Thor to enter with Loki. They were about to depart back to Asgard and you wanted to say goodbye. As he entered, your eyes ell to the tall blonde, and then the brooding black haired man next to him. You felt a sense of sadness take over. Thor had told you of what happened between them, you were the only one that would listen. It must be hard, for both of them.
As Thor walked closer, he handed Loki off to an agent before turning to you. He smiled as he looked down at you before he raised up his hand. You felt a sense of surprise as you saw a single medium sized sunflower in his hand. You met his gaze with surprise as he simply smiled at you as he handed you the flower "This one survived."
"Oh." You said somewhat bashfully "Thank you.."
"I can see why they are your favorite. They are bright, and quite beautiful. Like you."
You were sure the look on your face was one of bashfulness and confusion as Thor smiled at you once more before turning away. You watched him with a pounding heart as he nodded at you all once more before a bright colorful beam took them away.
Looking down at the yellow flower in your hand, you wondered when you would see him again, and hoped it would be sooner rather than later.
You nervously made your way through the Tower, having heard that a certain Norse God had arrived. Thor had returned to Earth a few times in the last three years, but you had not seen him personally since the battle of New York. He only stayed for a short period of time, usually just to visit, or to help out the Avengers.
And though you yourself were an Avenger, you were often taking care of other SHIELD related business at those times. You always felt a great since of disappointment when you had learned you missed seeing him each time.
But now, he was back, and you were here. You would finally see him again. He came back to earth due to a mission with the Avengers, to find Loki's scepter at a Hydra hideout.
Though you were excited to see him, you had a feeling he would not particularly care about you being there. He seemed to have an interest in you three years ago, but again, it had been three years. Perhaps he no longer cared, though, Natasha would tease you occasionally about him being disappointed at your absence each time he had come before.
As you entered the headquarters of the tower you jumped when your name was suddenly called. Turning you see Thor walking through another doorway towards you.
"Thor!" You greeted, slightly breathless and a bit more excited that you meant. "It's great to finally see you again." You continued as he stopped in front of you.
"And you." He beamed down at you, his eyes swimming with emotion before he cleared his throat. "Are you ready for our mission? It will be the first time we fight side by side in years."
"I'm ready if you are." You said with a grin as you both turned and headed towards the meeting room.
- - -
With the mission finished, the retrieval of Loki's scepter and the capture of Strucker, Tony insisted on throwing a party for the teams success.
As you entered the room, you looked around, seeing everyone spread around having a good time. You smiled as you spotted the others laughing and drinking, glad that things were going well.
Looking around casual for a certain blonde, you felt a chill crawl up your spine when someone stepped up behind you "Y/n."
Turning, you see Thor looking at you with a smile, two drinks in hand. Handing you one you take it with a smile "Thank you."
"You look wonderful." He said casually.
You glanced down at yourself, feeling a hint of self-consciousnesses take over before looking at Thor "And you are wearing normal clothes for once." He chuckled as he looked at his own outfit "I like it." You added on quickly.
Stepping a bit closer, he held out his elbow for you to take "Well, shall we have some fun."
Smiling at him, you looped your arm through his as you walked further into the room, meeting up with the others. The night was going well, but you couldn't get rid of an unusual feeling in the back of your mind.
- - -
The bad feeling at the back of your mind was right, and lead to quite the battle in Sakovia. One you were sure no one would get over easily. By the end of it, Bruce was gone, and the Avengers had a couple new recruits.
As you waited on the rooftop of the Tower, hands clasped behind your back, you felt a sense of weariness take over. You and Thor had grown a bit closer, but he was leaving again. To look for information of the infinity stones, and their possible importance.
"Y/n." Thor's voice called out, shaking you from your thoughts as he walked out onto the roof, where he was planning to depart.
"Thor." You greeted warmly "I thought I'd see you off."
He smiled at you as he approached, a hint of sadness in his eyes "I'm glad. I wished to give you these before I left." He said as he pulled a small bouquet of sunflowers from behind his back.
"Oh" you said almost breathlessly as you took them gingerly from him.
"I remember you said they were your favorite. Every since that day, in New York..anytime I see sunflowers, I think of you."
You looked from the flowers and into his blue eyes as he stared at you with a fond smile. "There are sunflowers in Asgard?" You asked with curiosity, to which he replied with a nod. "Thank you. Their beautiful, you didn't have to."
"No. But I wanted to. I am unsure of the next time I will return to Earth. And I...I wanted to make sure you had some idea of my feelings towards you." You felt speechless as he spoke, and he could tell this, seeing the astonished gleam in your eyes. Smiling once more he leaned towards you, pressing a gentle kiss to your cheek, not far from the edge of your lips, before pulling away from you. He began to walk backwards, before stopping in the center of the rooftop.
You smiled at him as the familiar colorful beam began to swirl around him, as you kept your gaze locked with his. He smiled at you and spoke one last time before he disappeared in the colorful light "Goodbye Sunflower."
Another three years had passed since you had seen Thor. You thought of him often, even between what happened to the Avengers after Sakovian accords and the battle at the airport.
You had heard nothing of Thor until Bruce had shown back up out of no where. He told you of what had happened on Asgard, and what happened with Thanos, a new enemy you would be facing. Now you could only hope that Thor was alright, and that he had survived.
But now, things had gotten even more complicated. You had reunited with some of the others in Wakanda to fight the oncoming battle and to protect Vision from the grasp of Thanos.
As you were beginning to grow overwhelmed by the mob of creatures running through the battlefield, you started to feel overwhelmed with doubt and fear. Suddenly a huge colorful beam of light struck the field, you felt a sense of relief and excitement flow through you as you recognized it. Suddenly a large axe flew through the air, as well as bright lightning bolts. When Thor stepped out you found a smile spreading across your face. And as he threw himself into battle you were in awe of his apparent increase in power.
You quickly regained some strength as you continued to fight the creatures around you. After cutting down some more you felt a presence land beside you as a lightning bolt struck down a creature next to you.
Turning quickly, you met the now not quite familiar eyes of Thor as he smiled at you. His hair was much shorter and his eyes now two different colors, you'd have to ask him about that later. He was different, but his smile was the same as he stared at you.
"Hello Sunflower" his voice rang out.
You smiled brightly at him "Hello Thor. Nice haircut." You added on, unsure of what to really say.
He simply smiled at you before you were both brought back to your surroundings when more creatures ran towards you. You and Thor began to fight side by side, and for a moment you felt as though nothing had changed.
- - - - -
You ran to Thor's side after Thanos vanished into a portal, as Steve approached "Where'd he go? Thor? Where'd he go?"
"Steve?" Bucky called out, causing you all to look over at him.
Your eyed widened in shock as Bucky seemed to disintegrate right in front of you. "Oh my God." You whispered out watching as Steve crouched down to now pile of ash. "What?!" you asked in desperation as Steve looked over at you and Thor.
Suddenly, you began to feel an uneasy feeling flowing through you. As though the air around you had begun to flow right through you. It felt wrong. It didn't hurt. But you didn't understand.
"What's happening?" You muttered out, as Steve and Thor looked at you.
Thor's eyes widened as he saw you look down at your hands, your fingers beginning to flow away. "No." He whispered as you met his eyes, terror filling them.
"Thor? Steve?" You asked as you began to panic watching your own hands seem to disappear.
"No!" Thor yelled as he ran forward, grabbing your arms as you began to feel yourself fade away.
You stared into his eyes as he pulled you close to his chest. He began to talk to you, rapidly, with desperation filling his voice "No, no, sunflower, stay here, no-" as you disappeared into nothing Thor stared down at his now empty arms feeling a sense of anguish take over "No." he muttered once more as he looked around, seeing others through the trees turning into nothing but dust. He felt all sense of emotion replaced with desperation as he realized, they had lost.
You didn't know everything that had happened in the last five years, but you knew enough. You were gone, but now you were back. And it was time for one final battle against Thanos. To end it all.
You walked through the portal with Bucky and the others as Sam flew over head. Hundreds of others came through similar portals all around you as you stared out at the desolate battle field. Steve standing alone in front of Thanos and his army. As Tony and Thor rose from the ground, watching as you all arrived.
Thor's eyes immedietely landed on you, seeing you standing there among the others that had returned, prepared to fight. Just as the last time he had seen you five years ago.
You stared at the army in front of you, turning as someone landed next to you. Seeing Thor, now again entirely different than the last time you had seen him. He turned and met your eyes, and you saw so much emotion behind them you knew he must have been through so much in the last five years.
A small smile formed on his face as you nodded at him smiling in return. Steve called out to all of you as you formed together as a team for one last battle "Avengers! Assemble."
You sat out on your balcony, staring out at the city. Your eyes landing on the distant ruble that used to be the Avengers compound. You felt a sense of melancholy take over as you looked at it. You thought of Tony and Natasha, and their sacrifice's, of Vision, taken forcefully. Of the others, all left to different areas, to move on with their lives in the aftermath of the blip.
The world was so different now. To you it had only been a few months, but to others, it had been years. Of terror, loss, grief, and now confusion and more rebuilding. Things were almost more complicated now it seems, than it was during the five years you had been gone.
You were unsure of your place in the world now. You felt you were no longer needed as an Avenger, a hero. People didn't really see as much of one anymore, now that the world was more chaotic and confused.
As lightning cracked in the distance, thunder rumbling soon after. Your mind thought back to Thor, and the last time you had seen him.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
After the battle, after Thanos was gone, and Tony dead. Thor came to you and pulled you into a hug. He held you tightly as he whispered against your hair "Welcome back sunflower." His voice was straightened and desperate.
After that, he seemed to distance himself before going to new Asgard, and then leaving with Peter Quill and his team. You could tell Thor had been hurt so much by Thanos, and you knew that he needed to reflect, to rebuild himself. But it still hurt that he left without even saying goodbye.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
You sighed as you looked out on the distant storm wondering if you'd ever see him again. And as though your thoughts had summoned him, a bolt of lightning struck your balcony. You screamed as you almost fell from your chair.
Breathing heavily as your heart hammered in your chest you saw a figure appear through the fading light that had briefly blinded you.
You stood from your seat as our eyes grazed over Thor as he stood on your balcony. One hand was behind his back as his other held his axe. He looked different than before, when he had left. He looked more like the Thor you had known years ago. His hair was long again, almost reaching his shoulders.
Thor silently watched you, his eyes seemingly grazing over you before he met your eyes "Hello sunflower" he said with a smile.
"Thor." You said softly, almost not believing that he was there at all "What are you doing here?"
Thor took a few steps closer, slowly setting his axe down against the railing. He remained silent for a moment as he seemed to ponder what to say "I brought you these" he said suddenly as he brought his hand out from behind his back.
You looked at the small bundle of orange and yellow sunflowers and felt a soft small grace your face. Sunflowers over the years had taken on a whole new meaning for you. They always made you think of him, just as they made him think of you.
He stopped in front of you, handing you the flowers, which you slowly took before meeting his eyes somewhat shyly. He cleared is throat softly "I-" he hesitated "I'm sorry I left without saying goodbye. I'm sure that must have hurt you, or maybe it didn't, I don't know." He faltered as he second guessed himself.
"It did." You said quickly, and you saw guilt pass over his features "I understood why you left, you had been through so much. But...why didn't you say goodbye? That part didn't make sense to me." You admitted.
Thor's face appeared conflicted as he tried to think of what to say. He stared down at the ground as he spoke, carefully picking each word. "I changed. Quite a bit, after what Thanos took from me. Many of my people died, Heimdall....Loki. And then you." He looked up and met your eyes, and you saw the pain behind them. "I had lost so much, and when I came back to Earth and found you here, I felt as though I still had something important I could fight for. And then you disappeared in my arms, and I could do nothing. I failed to stop Thanos and then he took you from me. Took you before-... before I could even ever have you. After that I became a version of myself I am ashamed to have become. And then you came back." He smiled at this, but then it faltered "But I was different, different than the man who...I hoped you had feelings for. So, I decided I needed to leave. To find who I once was, or to become someone else. Someone that was worthy once again. Not just to be the ruler of Asgard, or an Avenger, but also someone who was worthy of you."
You took a small step closer to him, placing your hand on his chest "You have and always will be worthy Thor. Yes you changed, but anyone would after what you experienced. And I'm sorry I could not have been there to help you through the pain. To change after loss, to get lost in the grief is something that happens to anyone, human or not. And you were right. I did have feelings for you, and I still do."
Thor stared at you, feeling his heart beat heavily in his chest as he felt the growing emotion at your words. Slowly bringing up his hand, he gently brushed the side of your face with his fingers "I thought of you so often. It was hard for me to not come back, but I needed to find my strength again. And I promise I wont leave without saying goodbye. I mean, I wont leave at all...if you don't want me too. We could be a team again."
You smiled brightly at him before you thought of how the world was now "Thor...Earth is different now. They have no need for nor want the Avengers. There will always be superheros to step in, but..I'm not one of them anymore."
Thor saw the sadness in your eyes "Where are the others?"
"Gone. Mostly. Clint is with his family, where he should be. Steve disappeared, as did Wanda. Bruce is spending his time trying to help fix the world. Sam and Bucky are working as a team now. Strange is doing what he's always done, as are the others. And I'm just....here." You were unable to hide the feeling behind your words and Thor felt even more guilt come over him.
"Have you been alone all this time?"
You opened your mouth to protest, to lie, but knew there was no point, so you just nodded slightly "More or less. I mean, I did go to New Asgard a couple times, to see how everyone was under Valkyries' rule."
"I'm sorry." He said "When I had left I didn't realize-"
"Of course not Thor." You cut him off "No one knew what was going to happen afterwards. You could not have known either."
A thought popped into Thor's head making him feel a new sense of excitement "Well then." He began as he looked at you, a gleam of excitement visible in his eyes "If you have no real reason to stay here. Then...come with me."
You let out an amused scoff "Where?"
"Anywhere." He began "I can take you to all the places I've been, in space I mean. And maybe we can meet up with Quill and his team again, I mean..we could go anywhere. Do anything." He finished his ramble, and placed both of his hands softly on either side of your face "We could be together sunflower."
You stared into his eyes and felt your own reflecting the excitement of the possibilities "Well I've never been to space." You joked.
Thor's smile widen "You'll come then?"
You grinned at him "When do we leave?"
He let out a breathy laugh "We can leave anytime you want. But first..." he trailed off as his eyes flicked down to your lips.
Leaning towards you, you leaned in to meet him, his lips pressing against yours softly, before he deepened the kiss. His hands left your face, his arms then wrapping around your waist as he pulled you closer. The kiss became passionate as the build up of feelings you had for each other over the years seemed to finally be set free as you embraced. Your mind was silenced as you relished in his arms, but soon your thoughts would be full of excitement about your new adventure, with the man you loved.
xx End xx
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V.I.V.I.D. Chapter 1
Summary: You were a college student who didn’t stand out. No, really, I’m telling you, you were just some girl who preferred gaming over being a party animal. If you didn’t get to play video games, you cried while you struggled in front of your assignments. Typical student life, right?
And yet, somehow getting involved in the Battle of New York in 2012 set you into another path in life rather than the one you were sure you secured. In fact, your life was about to get more colorful.
Pairings: Avengers x Fem!Reader, To-Be-Revealed x Fem!Reader
Word count: 3.8k
A/N: God I feel so nervous posting this haha. This is my first fanfic in the fandom so I hope you will enjoy the story. You are welcome to leave any feedback to help me improve or any comment in general. :) Also English isn’t my first language so I’m sorry if some parts don’t really make sense-
Chapter 2 (coming soon)
You woke up with a jolt at the sound of your alarm from your phone. After a while, you groaned as you attempted to turn it off. You then realized that you were not in your bed, but sitting in front of your desk. Must’ve fallen asleep while working on your last assignment for the semester. You took a deep breath, letting the cool air that occupied your room fill your lungs. Discomfort palpated your left cheek as your mind awakened slowly. When you sat up in your chair, you realized it was from the fact you slept on your keyboard. Still half asleep, you checked the state of your face with your phone. You saw some spots on your face, but the desk lamp didn’t provide enough lighting for you to check.
You rose up from your seat, yawning away some of your tiredness, and headed to the bathroom as quietly as possible without waking up your roommate. You squinted at the brightness of the bathroom light when you turned it on before taking a glance at your reflection in the mirror. Finals season definitely didn’t treat you well. Your reflection was terrible. You had bags under your eyes, wrinkles were forming again, and you could see well-shaped marks on your cheek. Annoyance filled your sigh. Should’ve thought twice before overworking to exhaustion in front of your desk. You brushed your teeth and washed your face, massaging your cheek to make the marks less clear.
When you left the bathroom, you checked the time. 6:10 A.M.… You had less than 6 hours to finish your database assignment and drop it off on campus. Stripes of sunlight coming through the blinds painted themselves in the kitchen. You exhaled deeply, still feeling exhausted. You regretted spending a good amount of the time gaming instead of starting your paper earlier. Nothing could save your ass now. You made yourself some of the terrible instant coffee you bought last night. To your discontent, your favorite brand was out of stock. You hoped the horrible taste would still help you stay awake.
You went back to your room and plopped in your seat. It was only then that you noticed your screen was still on… and you had an interminable amount of pages filled with random letters in your paper. Surely from the face on the keyboard. You groaned loudly at the sight of the mess. Not only weren’t you done, but you also had to correct and check everything. You unenthusiastically began to fix your document.
The task took you about an hour and a half; you had to verify no more mistakes were present. Sounds of traffic in the streets outside were getting prominent even with the windows of your bedroom closed. You rubbed away the headache that was settling in and checked what was remaining.
“Okay… so I’m missing number 2 and number 6…” You gently bit the tip of your thumb as you thought. “I really hope to finish this by 11…”
You took one last sip before working and typing the solutions to the questions. Thankfully, you’ve done some research on the questions beforehand. Around 9:00 A.M., you heard some movement outside your room. Probably your roommate getting up for the day. Soon you heard a few knocks on your door. A voice soon followed.
“Hey girl,” it greeted you with a little cheerful tone.
You took a quick look to notice first the purple uncombed fluff on the head of Kai, your roommate and your closest friend, still in their pajamas.
“Hey friend. I can’t talk too much, but come in,” you invited them.
They let themselves come into your room and plopped on your unmade bed. “Did you even sleep at all Y/N?”
“I did. Woke up on my keyboard...” you replied, still staring at your screen as you were inserting graphs in your paper.
“No way! Lemme see!” They got closer to you and saw the marks on your cheek fading away. They snorted. “Wow. That’s pretty funny.”
“Ha ha. Sure,” you retorted with sarcasm. You still gave them a little smile.
“Ok ok I’m sorry,” they replied, trying not to laugh. They leaned forward to check your screen. You checked them quickly when you felt their immense presence above you. You always forgot how tall they simply were in comparison with you. Standing at 6’1” and having a broadly fit body, they were impossible to miss. They moved their bangs away from their eyes to see better, biting their bottom lip lightly. “When is this due?”
“You’re nearly done at least?” They stood back up adequately, moving some hair strands behind their right ear. They flopped back on your bed.
“Almost done with a question, then I have one more left.”
“You think you’re going to have enough time to go to the campus as well?”
“Hopefully. Let’s talk when I’m done?”
“Sure,” Kai groaned, getting up on their feet, and paced to leave your room.
“Oh, Kai? Can you please get me a refill? Gonna need it.” You passed them your empty cup.
They took it and immediately recognized the smell. Somehow it was their hidden talent. “Is that the shitty instant coffee we both hate?”
You sighed, regretting everything. You paused your typing to look at them. “Yes.”
“Girl, I told you to pick something else.”
You rolled your eyes, not wanting to hear anymore of this topic. “Kai, I don’t have the time to argue.” You turned your gaze to your screen, typing what you were thinking.
“Right, right, gotta finish your assignment. Gonna get you that refill.”
They walked away as you continued your paper. They came back with your coffee as you were starting the last question. You thanked them as you squinted at your screen. They quickly left your room when they left your coffee on your desk to let you focus. You hummed. Geez, that last question was more complicated than you thought. After all, you grasped little of the material related to it.
“Okay Y/N, come on… You can do this…”
You took another deep breath and started typing again. Eventually, you started cursing at the program’s compiler for not rendering the model of your database. Then you cried all the blasphemies you know because Word crashed on you. You apologized to it soon after when you realized it had an auto-saved version of your paper. Finally, your laptop didn’t warn you were out of battery before shutting down. To be fair, you were so focused on your document that you didn’t notice the notification.
A quarter before eleven, you finally finished your assignment and you’ve saved it in your USB key. All that was remaining was to print it on campus and drop it at the professor’s office. Your stomach growled. You were hungry, but you wanted to finish the submission of your work first. You changed to your college hoodie and some sweatpants before grabbing your eyeglasses and your sling bag to store your USB key. When you left your bedroom, Kai was scrolling through social media on their phone, laying on the couch. They noticed you.
“Finally done,” you replied as you put glasses on.
“I assume you’re going to school.” They stood up, stretching a bit. “Can I come with you?”
You gave them a puzzled look. “Why? You’re already done with your semester. Also, aren’t you supposed to have work today?”
They paced towards you. “Well, because I have spent little time with my best friend who confined herself in her room when she gets home.” You rolled your eyes with a brief smile. You knew you were very busy the past few weeks, but didn’t think Kai would miss you that much during that period. They stopped right next to you, looking down on you with a growing smirk. God, you knew they were teasing you about your height and they were doing their job right. Goddamn tall people. You didn’t have such a height difference, but they still commented about your “shorter” stature. You were 5’7” for crying out loud! You pulled your tongue at them, a grin forming on your lips. They scoffed before continuing, “also, today’s my day off. Requested it last week and honestly, I needed a bit of time off.”
You snorted. “Weren’t you hired like 6 months ago?”
“Hey! It was still 6 months of part-time working without asking for any break that is not the holidays!” they protested, looking offended.
“Alright, alright! Tag along then, but we gotta hurry.”
“But it’s not even eleven–”
“Kai…,” you warned them in a low voice.
They raised their hands in protest. “I’m kidding! Give me ten minutes-“
A grin creeped on your lips. “I give you five.”
They huffed, showing you a mocking, pouty face. “Killjoy.”
“Just hurry,” you laughed as you hushed them away. They pouted as they headed to their bedroom to get ready.
While you waited, you went back to the bathroom to check yourself. The marks from the keyboard were barely present on your cheeks and to your surprise, you didn’t seem as tired as you actually were. You did yawn a bit when Kai finally came out of their room, dressed and ready to go. Their style usually followed the trend, but also not standing out. While sometimes you envied their sense of fashion and how fluid they can be with their outfits, you rather stuck with the more relaxed and comfortable wear. Their hair was sticking out a bit from their beanie. They took their purse while you grabbed your cap and you both left your apartment. As you locked the door, they couldn’t help themselves but to ask you something.
“You know, Delilah is planning a party to celebrate the end of the semester…” You groaned slightly, closing your eyes. You knew where this was going, but you let them finish. “and I thought it’d be great for the both of us to chill with other people.”
“You know very well that I don’t do well with parties. Too many people.” You opened your eyes again, stored away your keys as you both started walking towards the exit. You fixed your glasses on the bridge of your nose. “I’d rather stay home and play some Final Fantasy or something–”
“Oh, come on Y/N, we’re still young,” they whined, making your eyes roll. “Why not have fun while we can?”
“Life doesn’t end once we graduate, Kai. And we don’t have to attend parties to have fun.”
They scratched the back of their head. “Fair enough. But how many people do you know from our school except me? And that you hang out with.”
You sighed. “No one else.”
“See what I mean?” You exited the building, the humid weather of NYC welcoming you. You started walking towards your school. “You live in the middle of New York, you only have me as a friend who also knows the city like the back of their hand... And you don’t even have a boyfriend.”
“I’m not in New York to check out boys. And why are we even on this topic?”
“Because I’m worried about your well-being, Y/N.” You both stopped at a red light.
“I just want to finish this forsaken degree and get a job ASAP.” You stuck your hands in your jeans’ pockets. “With all the classes I failed, I don’t want to add another 3 years behind the college’s desks. And it’s definitely not by partying that’s going to help me pass my classes…”
They wrapped one of their long arms around your shoulders, leaning against you. Why you little shit... “I get that, dear, but you can’t always stay cocooned in our apartment whenever you have free time. You never go out.”
“Hey!” you protested. “Whenever we go out to eat or walk in Central Park, that’s going out!”
They pointed at your nose. “Doesn’t count. I meant including other people than your favorite roommate.” Their answer made you groan, giving them a smile. The light being green, you both started walking again. “You know, I could hook you up with–”
You immediately interrupted them, removing yourself from their embrace, “Not happening, thanks, though. Can we please talk about something other than my social circle?” You were already nervous about your assignment. You didn’t want to hear them suggesting another date with some random guy. It wasn’t something you had an interest in at the moment, anyway.
“Fair enough,” Kai sighed loudly as they shook their head slowly. You both arrived on campus, walking towards the Labs building. “Have you found an internship?”
“Nope. I really thought I’d be able to at least get an interview with Stark Industries…”
“I’m sorry, I would’ve helped you with that.” They crossed their arms, feeling guilty. “You applied for a completely different department than mine, and it’s not like I’d be able to talk to their HR, anyway.”
“It’s okay Kai.” You gave them a faint smile. “Not your fault the one I dealt with was a bitch…”
“No kidding! What’s with the power trip they got sometimes, geez…” they scoffed.
You both entered the building. Kai got recognized by some students and you clutched your hands on your bag tightly, hoping you’d be invisible to them. You continued to walk, as Kai was trailing behind you. Soon enough, they caught up to you.
“By the way, why do you wear glasses? You don’t even need them.”
Your eyes glanced up towards them as you opened the door to enter one of the computer labs. They weren’t wrong, you never needed glasses. Your eyes had 20/20 vision and there was no practical purpose in using them. Though, after a while of wearing them, they brought you some kind of comfort. It was like you felt protected when you wore them.
“Well, it’s the perfect accessory to make myself invisible from the flock of our peers.” Your answer made them snort as you grinned. You both entered the lab. “No, but for real, I just started to wear them and honestly… I got used to them. Plus, most of us in CS are just a bunch of nerds with glasses. Easier to blend in I guess.” You checked the room, seeing a few students sitting at their spots.
“You’re a little weirdo, you know that?”
“As if everyone else isn’t weird, Kai.” You spotted an empty spot in the back of the room and sat down in front of the monitor. “You got your own weird things.”
Your friend plopped down in the seat next to you and looked at you with a perplexed stare. “Like what?”
“Like how you can just smell the most random thing and you find out what it is first try.” You logged in your account and inserted your USB key in the tower.
“Okay, but you gotta admit it’s a sick talent,” they bragged.
“Sure, whatever you say,” you snorted.
“Back to your glasses, though…” They started spinning on the computer chair slowly. “It’s a shame you don’t walk around without them. You sure have a cute little face.”
“What, so I’m ugly with them?” you gave them a teasing grin as you prepared to print your assignment.
They chuckled, shaking their head. “Na, you’re still adorable with them, buuuuut…”
“If this is another attempt to say I can get some guys, please don’t.” You clicked the button to send the order to the printer and stood up to pick up your paper.
“Right.” They held their fist a bit in the air, knowing they already lost the debate. “Right…” Sighing, they followed suit.
You took your document, browsed through it to make sure you didn’t miss any page or any information deemed necessary before stapling it, and you headed to the exit. Your friend followed you all the way to the technology department, saying hi to some of their friends. The both of you talked about various topics as you made your way to the computer science department where you could drop your paper in the assignment chute. You checked the time on your phone. 11:30 a.m. You still had some time for a last check-up. Kai tried to push you a bit to just submit it, but you had to be sure. As you verified the last page, you could see them fidgeting with excitement. You scoffed at them. They truly were your best supporter. As you left your last assignment to fall in the chute, they suddenly hugged you tightly and spun you around like a little kid, squealing with joy.
“You’re finally done!! Congrats girl!”
You couldn’t help yourself but laugh at their reaction. “Thanks Kai.”
Done with their little show, they gently put you down on your feet, still having a massive grin showing all their teeth. You suddenly felt your legs getting weak and your head felt light. You leaned against a wall as Kai noticed something was wrong. Their face changed to frowns. They immediately tried to support you and slowly helped you sit on the ground. “Hey, you good?” Your stomach growled loudly in response, making your cheeks turn to a slight pink from embarrassment. They couldn’t stop themselves from snorting. “When was the last time that you ate, Y/N?”
“Uhhh…” You thought for a few seconds. “was it yesterday morning?”
“We’re definitely getting lunch ASAP. Here, take this in the meantime," they reached out to their purse and handed you a protein bar. You thanked them as you took the snack. They sat down next to you as you unwrapped the bar and started eating it a bit. You both stayed silent. You threw a glance at their profile, their eyes staring at their phone screen.
While they were sometimes pushy on certain topics, you knew Kai cared a lot about you. They’ve been like this ever since you met them four years ago. You were both freshmen who got paired for the college dorms. Even though you were shy, Kai has managed to make you get out of your shell around them. You soon enough became close friends. It didn't take long before you witnessed their wilder personality and lifestyle; being at parties and with people was very important to Kai. Nonetheless, they respected your boundaries and your limits when it came to social interactions, especially when it was any other person than them. Nowadays, whenever you would see one of Kai’s usual partners, you would try to converse with them minimally, most of the time topics like the weather and how they’ve been.
You must've stared at Kai for too long, as they noticed your gaze on them. They looked back at you in confusion.
By the middle of your second year, you both moved out to an apartment close to campus and that had a decent view on the streets of New York City. Surprisingly, you both never had a fight with the other so far. Instead, if you were not studying or gaming and Kai wasn’t at a party, you would do activities with them like binging series and movies. They even introduced you to your favorite musical movie, Mamma Mia!. Sure, it was very cheesy, but to you the songs were just so good and catchy. You enjoyed other musicals, but Mamma Mia! was still the best for you. Otherwise, both of you would even blast some music and sing and dance wildly as you were doing chores around the apartment. They taught you a move or two, but you had some groove in you. Well, that last part was Kai's opinion, at least.
"Oh, nothing. Just thought how hot my roommate is," you teased them while jabbing slightly at their side.
Your reply made them laugh. "Why thank you, honey. Never thought I would've heard that from you."
You shrugged as you laughed with them. "What do you know, I may still have some taste." You winked at them.
“I don’t know, anything works really.” You groaned as you laid a hand on your stomach.
They let out a snort. "Alright, alright, if you're joking, then you must be feeling better." They stood up and reached out a hand towards you. As you clasped yours into theirs, they gently pulled you up. “So, what should we eat?”
“How about shawarma?”
“Oh! Haven’t had some in a while, huh…”
“Okay, let’s go before I have to carry you on my back.”
You didn’t notice the screams from pedestrians five blocks away, nor did you hear the loud impacts. It was only when you noticed a woman standing ten feet from you shrieking with fear as she was looking up. As she stumbled away in the opposite direction, Kai and you both looked behind you in confusion. It was then that you saw it. A giant flying monstrous creature you’ve never seen before. More creatures like it were coming out from some kind of black hole in the sky above the Stark Tower. You saw other unidentified bodies flying around the area, shooting lasers from their little ships. The buildings nearby were getting destroyed by the invaders. Cars were flying away because of the explosions. Other civilians were scrambling away in fear, some bumping into one another, to shelter themselves from danger. Some of them would get hit by the lasers or get caught by the blasts. A man fell not even five feet in front of you, his body not showing any sign of life. Your pupils dilated, and you started sweating bullets. Your breathing staggered as you tried to move to get out of the way. All the muscles in your body were frozen. You couldn’t hear anything but your heartbeat getting louder and louder in your head. You didn’t hear Kai yelling at you to run. Was this the doomsday the conspiracy seekers were all panicking about for the past year? Were they actually right this entire time? You didn’t react in time to run away. As Kai was trying to pull you with them, another explosion blasted near you. The impact produced intense shock waves, propelling you both away.
“Ugh, let’s not. Don’t want people to think I’m drunk in the middle of the day…”
“Pffff, sure, whatever. Come on.”
They pulled you by your wrist and you followed them out of the building with a smile, rolling your eyes at their behavior. You shivered a bit as you felt the contrast of temperature between the air conditioning of the building versus the warm weather outside. Kai finally let you go as you walked up next to them towards the shop. They kept throwing some dumb jokes and funny anecdotes and you couldn’t help but laugh at how absurd some of them were. You started walking on Park Avenue.
It was the last thing you remembered as everything went black.
Chapter 2 (coming soon)
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not that it matters a lot but would making a separate Masterlist solely for my Filipino!reader fics be a good thing to do???
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Head Over Feet
Fandom: The Avengers/MCU
Relationship: Loki/Fem!Reader (Charmspeaker!Reader)
Drabble #1 : You couldn't help it. It was all Loki's fault.
When you first met, you were trying to stay away from other people. Luckily enough, Loki was in a similar space. Living with a group of people who once wanted him dead was not an easy experience. Even if they claimed they had forgiven him, Loki was not quick to trust that sentiment.
That was why his pursuit of you was surprising. It started with him joining you in the library. You tried to leave to give him space, but he asked you to stay. Surprised by the request, you settled back into your couch and started reading again. You missed the smile he gave you before opening his own book.
After a few weeks of silently reading in the same proximity as each other, Loki began to push at the boundaries of your blossoming friendship. He would set aside his book and start to tell you about his day. Sometimes it was about something Thor said to him that got on his nerves. He would talk to you about anything he could think of actually. He never expected you to respond or contribute anything more than a gesture or two, which was something you appreciated. Instead he would talk enough for the two of you, learning how to read your expressions and body language.
And you had no choice but to hear him.
No one had ever treated you the way Loki did. He was patient and kind. The first time he brought you a mug of your favorite tea, you were stupefied.
“This is what you drink, right?” Loki asked, holding the mug out to you.
You stared down at the mug then back up at him. You nodded up at him timidly.
“Excellent.” Loki smiled. It wasn’t the smirk you had seen plastered to his face, but a genuine smile, “You’re welcome.”
With a wink, he pressed the mug into your hand before going back to his regular armchair. You stared down at the warm beverage in awe. With a small smile, you took a sip. Once again, missing Loki’s pleased grin. It became a nightly occurrence, Loki bringing you tea when he joined you in the library. Occasionally, the tea was accompanied by a sweet treat you knew came from his hidden stash. The stash Thor frequently and loudly coveted. It was such a simple gesture, but one that meant the world to you.
You weren’t used to people doing nice things for you without expecting something in return. You waited on edge for weeks for Loki to make his demands. For him to ask a favor of you. He never did. He only ever smiled at you and talked to you. Every now and then he’d harass you into playing a game of some sort with him, but never anything you wouldn’t have done willingly.
Over time, he started to reply to your minor expressions as if you had verbally replied. It was shocking at first. He paid enough attention to you to learn what your little reactions meant. It was a strange feeling, knowing someone worked so hard to get to know you, in spite of your attempts to keep them away. Even stranger, you weren’t used to liking such attention.
When your relationship progressed and you started to speak around Loki, it was like a dam burst. Once you started talking, you couldn’t stop. Loki had always listened so attentively. He paid attention to every rant and random musing. He wanted to hear what you had to say, and he enjoyed listening to your voice. He had to be the best listener that you ever met.
He was so much more than your lover. He was your best friend. A best friend with benefits, you chuckled to yourself. It took you so long to allow yourself to feel this way for another person. To let someone else in. It felt healthy and rational, something you weren’t used to feeling. It scared you.
Sometimes you wondered if you should pull away, but Loki always knew how to bring you back. Treating you like the scared cat on the street you truly were, Loki slowly gained your trust. In painfully slow increments.
From just sitting next to you reading silently for hours at a time, to holding you in his arms at night, Loki won you over. In spite of yourself. So, of course it shouldn’t be alarming that you fell for him. Head over feet. It shouldn’t be a surprise that you loved him. You couldn’t help it. It was all Loki’s fault.
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Could I request a fic with Bucky or Zemo, whichever you want, where the reader has a one night stand with them and doesn’t think too much on it but they want more?
I went with Bucky for this fic. Hope you guys don't mind lots of angst!
Title: If I Had Known
MCU tag list: @geocookie21, @greeneyedblondie44
Everything tag list: @greenrevolutionary
The soft sunlight spread across Bucky’s face as he woke up gradually. A soft smile spread across his face as memories from last night resurfaced. Your warm body pressed up against his. Your arms wrapped around his neck as you gasped his name. Your soft lips pressed against his, a touch he had almost forgotten until you came into his life. Bucky hadn’t been expecting you to want him, to fall into his arms as he pressed you against the wall after your mission, but to his surprise you had. He had wanted you since he had first saw you and the more he got to know you the more attracted he became. He rolled over, wanting to pull your body back against his, but his eyes flew open at what he found.
The space beside his was empty.
In a flash he was out of the bed and pulling on his underwear. Someone must’ve broken and kidnapped you but if that was the case why didn’t he wake up? Maybe someone had drugged the two of you and that’s how they managed to take you. Bucky tried his best not to panic and he made his way through the hallways. There was a perfectly reasonable explanation to thi-
You looked up at Bucky as he practically ran into the safe house living room. The two of you stared at each other for a moment before you sighed and threw you travel bag down. You had really hoped that you could’ve slipped out and avoided this conversation.
“You should be asleep.” You said
“You’re up.” Said Bucky ignoring your comment
“As are you.”
“I was going to make you breakfast.”
“While you were still asleep.”
“Sit,” Bucky took a step towards you, “Or go back to bed. I’ll get you something to eat.”
“Bucky, that isn’t going to happen.”
“Even after last night.”
You winced. This was why you wanted to leave early. Ideally you would’ve left last night but Bucky had trapped you in his arms before you could leave. You tried your hardest to stay awake but you couldn’t resist just falling asleep in is embrace. You ran a hand through your hair as you avoided his gaze.
“Yeah.” You said quietly
Bucky’s tone was short and clipped. All the joyous atmosphere from last night was seeping away by the second. The room was becoming too small, too hot, and you reluctantly sat down. Bucky had a pained expression, as though he couldn’t believe what he was hearing, but what made you uneasy was the look in his eyes. The cold rage that made you wish you could teleport. You would’ve preferred it if he started shouting at you, the level tone adding more pain.
“I thought you knew.” You said
“That some agents, or ex-agents I should say, had sex after a completed mission as a celebration. Both survived, mission complete, time to unwind after a stressful couple of weeks.”
“As a way to unwind.”
“Didn’t anyone tell you?”
“I thought Sam was joking.”
“You know,” Bucky walked over and sat down next to you, “I thought you liked me.”
“I do like you.”
“Then what’s stopping us from continuing this,” Bucky reached up and brushed a strand of hair behind your ear, “I can take you out of breakfast. It can be our first date. I must be bit rusty but I can-“
“Bucky,” you interrupted, “I like you but as a friend. If I had known you had… feelings for me I never would’ve slept with you. Fuck, this shouldn’t have happened.”
“You regret it.”
You looked over sharply at him, not knowing where to look. The rage in Bucky’s eyes had died down but the hurt was almost too much to bear. Your eyes flicked down briefly at his chest but you quickly looked away not wanting to be reminded by last night’s events. Instead you looked at a point slightly let of his head. Bucky sighed at your stubbornness and gently held your chin as he forced you to look into his eyes.
“We can give this a go,” he said, “You just have to trust me.”
“I do trust you.”
Bucky leant closer. Your breath hitched as you felt his nose brush against yours. His grip tightened when you tried to back away and panic settled in the pit of your stomach. Before he had a chance to press his lips against yours you raised your hand. His lips pressed against your palm. You sighed as you stood up and grabbed your bag.
“I’m sorry Bucky,” you said, “Really I am. Hopefully one day you’ll forgive me.”
Bucky didn’t move for a long time after you had left. Your words echoed around his head and the more he thought about them the angrier he got. Eventually he stood up and marched back to the room. As he threw on his clothes a plan formed in his head. One way or another he was going to get you back in his arms and next time there’d be no leaving him.
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Best Friend’s Brother - Chris Evans x Reader (Part 11*)
Summary: You and Scott have been best friends ever since you were 10, meeting at summer camp. Being best friends with Scott means you know his family very well. Especially his older brother. After a failed attempt at dating Chris when you were 18, when you move to LA for a job will you and Chris grow close again? What would the world think? and most importantly what would Scott think?
Word Count: 3.8k
Warnings: SMUT 18+ ONLY!
You woke up the next morning with your head on Chris’ chest. You could feel his steady heartbeat which was incredibly calming and almost made you fall straight back to sleep. You glance up to see him still sound asleep. His face completely relaxed, his long eye lashes resting against his cheeks.
His hair was messy but in a super adorable boyish kinda way, and his beard was all scruffy but still looked incredible. You felt a smile growing, especially when he wrapped his arms around you tighter pulling your body closer to his in his sleep. Letting out a hum of content as he did so.
You could watch him sleep for hours and you probably would of if he didn’t begin to stir. He scrunched his brows slightly in the cutest way possible before his eye lids fluttered open revealing his bright blue eyes. At this distance you could even see the little flecks of green in them. When his eyes focused on yours a smile pulls at his lips.
“Mornin’” he mumbles his voice husky and full of sleep that made your insides turn to jelly when you heard it.
“Good Morning, how you feeling?” You ask him sitting up slightly so you could look at him properly.
“The most relaxed I have ever been” he smiles leaning over to kiss you on the forehead.
“Glad to hear it, so what are your plans for today?” You ask him.
He looks up in thought for a moment “well I should probably go pick dodger up from Scott’s since as far as he’s aware I’m arriving back today, but then I’m free all day, what about you?” He asks you resting his hand on your side.
“Well I also agreed to go see Scott today so we should probably work it out, so we don’t arrive at the same time” you say making Chris chuckle.
“Well I do probably need to head back to mine first so if you go over first then I’ll see you over there” Chris says.
“Should get my acting skills ready to greet you as if I haven’t already see you” you joke making him laugh.
“Can’t wait to see those skills” Chris snorts sarcastically making you push him away.
“Hey, I’m not an actor like you!” You laugh making Chris grab you and hold you tight as he laughs along with you.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry” he laughs holding you close and burying his face in the crook for your neck.
You arrived at Scott’s house alone an hour later. Dodger instantly greets you, a little more enthusiastically than usual. You thought that maybe he could smell Chris on you, you just hoped it wasn’t too obvious. Scott thankfully seemed oblivious to it all offering you a drink.
Once you two had your drinks you walked out into the garden to enjoy the nice weather and catch up. You had been chatting for about an hour, playing fetch with dodger as you talked, when the doorbell went, and dodger went racing to the door.
You follow Scott inside as goes to answer the door. As suspected it was Chris, who barely had enough time to step inside before dodger had tackled him to the floor. He was laughing and stuttering as dodger wiggled and licked his face all over. You and Scott made no attempt to help since you were both doubled over laughing at the scene.
Eventually dodger calmed down and Scott offered Chris a hand as he stood up pulling him in for a hug.
“How are you? Good week of press?” Scott asks patting Chris on the shoulder.
“Alright, same old same old, tad stressful last part of the week but I’m good now” Chris says glancing over at you at the last half of his sentence.
“Ah good, we were just chilling in the garden come join us” Scott says gesturing behind him.
“Yeah sounds great” Chris smiles nodding his head.
“Awesome head on out and I’ll grab you a drink” Scott says heading into the kitchen leaving you and Chris alone.
“Your acting skills are Oscar worthy” Chris whispers in your ear as you walk out into the garden.
You laugh shoving him playfully to which he just grabs your hand pulling you into a hug with a laugh. You feel him kiss the top of your head making you roll your eyes.
“Careful” you whisper a warning taking a step away and sitting down in your seat.
Scott soon appeared drinks in hand, passing Chris his drink before the two of them sat down. Conversation quickly flowed as Chris told the two of you about his week. You didn’t need to act like you hadn’t heard all this before since Chris mostly told stories from earlier on in the week. The ones you didn’t get to hear last night.
“God the weather is incredible isn’t it! Just wanna laze by the pool, if I had one that is!” Scott says sending a suggestive look to you and Chris. The ones lucky enough to have pools.
“Well Chris has got a bigger one” you say turning to Chris who just laughs.
“We can go to mine if you want, you both got costumes ready?” Chris asks.
“No, but I can swing by mine on the way and meet you there?” You suggest.
“Sounds like a plan, I’ll text Steve and tell him to meet us there when he gets back from work” Scott says pulling out his phone.
“Great, well I’ll see you boys over there” you say standing up and pulling out your keys.
“See you there” Chris smiles as you head out.
When you got back to yours you went to go find a bikini. As you looked through your closet you found one that you hadn’t worn before, which was surprising since it was a colour that perfectly complimented your skin tone. It was a bit skimpier than you usually wore but nothing extreme, and to be honest you were curious as to what Chris’ reaction would be.
You’d be lying if you said you’d hadn’t worn this bikini with ulterior motives in mind. Yes you and Chris had slept together before but that was years ago now, he was in fact your first. You knew experience could change a lot though, and you wanted to see how things had changed. Hopefully for the better, if that night of your 2nd/100th date was anything to go by, it was almost certainly for the better.
When you arrived at Chris’ house you felt like you’d fallen through a wormhole and gone back in time 20 years. Chris and Scott were chasing each other around the garden trying to push each other into the pool. Eventually Chris caught Scott throwing him into the pool, but Scott had grabbed hold of Chris pulling him in with him.
Chris resurfaced pushing his hair from his face when his eyes landed on you. You could see the subtle double take he did when he spotted your bikini through your thin cover up.
“You boys finished playing?” You laugh.
Scott splashes Chris tearing his attention away from you and back to his brother who he promptly splashed back.
“I’ll take that as a no then” you chuckle moving over to the deck chairs.
You removed your cover up and started reapplying sunscreen.
“Whoa looking hot!” You hear Scott shout making you laugh.
Chris who had his back to you glances over his shoulder, before turning to face you barely holding back a smirk.
Scott sees an opportunity and uses it to tackle Chris from behind. Chris comes back up spluttering and the water fight between the two boys continues.
You recline back in your seat enjoying the rays as the two of them continue to mess around. Soon the splashing stopped as the two of them took a break sitting on the side of the pool.
“Hey (Y/N), you gonna join us any time soon?” Scott calls out grabbing your attention.
“Nah I’m good thanks!” You laugh shaking your head.
“I’m not satisfied with that answer are you Scott?” Chris asks smirking over at Scott.
“Not at all, Chris would you do the honours?” Scott smirks looking over at you mischievously.
“No, don’t you dare” you warn holding your arms out as Chris climbed out of the pool and walked over to you.
“C’mon” Chris laughs grabbing your hands and pulling you from your chair despite your best efforts.
“No Chris stop!” You laugh protesting digging in your heels to stop him.
He laughs trying to pull you along, when you put the brakes on more he grabs you around the waist and lifts you over his shoulder. You hit his back begging for him to put you down. He just laughs and continues to walk towards the pool.
“No, no, no! Chris please! Don’t!” You beg but it didn’t work mostly because you were also laughing.
Chris comes to a stop and you think for a moment that he’d actually stopped. That was not the case though, as before you knew it you were flying through the air into the pool with a large splash.
You came up spluttering and gasping for air, not actually expecting him to throw you in the pool. Both of the boys were laughing hysterically, Chris was practically on the floor clutching his chest.
You pushed your hair out of your face wiping the water off your face waiting for the two of them to calm down.
“You’re gonna pay for that Evans” you warn glaring up at Chris who was still laughing.
“Oh really? What ya gonna do?” Chris taunts raising his eyebrow at you.
“That’s for me to know, and for you to discover later” you smirk you see Chris swallow slightly, his eyes boring into yours and you could see the restraint in them.
“Chris I’d watch your back, (Y/N) is a master of revenge” Scott laughs clearly oblivious to the tension between you and Chris.
Chris finally tears his eyes from yours turning to look at Scott.
“Is that why you got me to do it?” Chris asks him and Scott just shrugs his shoulders with feigning innocence.
Chris just rolled his eyes shaking his head and he sat down on the edge of the pool.
You chuckle moving to swim a couple of laps in the pool as the boys chatted. You were soon joined by the boys which quickly turned into a competition of who could swim faster.
It was always tight between the three of you, leading to many repeats. You had just completely yet another race and were all arguing about who won or cheated or whatever.
“What is it with you lot and your competitiveness” Steve laughs grabbing all your attentions.
“Oh hey babe didn’t see you come in” Scott says climbing out of the pool to greet Steve.
You also climbed out of the pool grabbing a towel to dry yourself off, Chris following suit.
“Let me grab you a drink” Chris says heading inside.
When he returns the 4 of you sat down together and chatted. One of the good things about hanging out when Steve was with you was that Scott often sat with Steve meaning it wasn’t unusual for you and Chris to sit together.
While you chatted you grabbed some more sunscreen and started reapplying it.
“May I?” Chris asks gesturing for the sunscreen, you nod passing it over once you were done.
You try to focus on the conversation as opposed to Chris as he rubbed sunscreen over himself.
“Do you mind doing my back?” Chris asks catching you off guard slightly.
You glance over to Scott and Steve who seemed unfazed and were still talking.
“Uh yeah sure” you say grabbing the bottle and started applying some to his back.
As you did so you could feel his back muscles tensing under your touch. You tried to clear your throat and you were pretty sure this was Chris getting you back for the bikini.
If the shit eating grin he gave you was anything to go by, it was almost certain that he was teasing you.
So when Scott suggested having ice creams or ice lollies you quickly knew how to get revenge.
You opted for an ice lolly. You let out a moan as your lips wrapped around it, partly because of the cold and delicious taste, mostly to see what reaction you got from Chris. You almost laughed when he choked slightly.
“This is delicious and exactly what I needed” you sighed not making eye contact with Chris who had shifted in his seat.
He however clearly had the same idea as you when he opted to have an ice cream. He caught your attention by giving his ice cream and long lick and you had to focus on your own lolly to distract yourself.
The games were on.
For the rest of the day both you and Chris tested how far you could push the other without either Scott or Steve noticing. You felt like you were winning though as Chris had to jump in the pool a couple times to cool off.
Scott and Steve had offered you a lift back home with them, but you turned them down. Opting to get an uber instead since they’d have to drive the wrong direction to get to your house.
You were sat on the couch scroll through your phone when Chris moved to stand in front of your arms crossed.
“Can I help you?” You smirks glancing up at him innocently.
He leans over placing his hand on the back of the couch, caging you in.
“You were really testing my patience today” Chris says a grin pulling at his lips slightly.
“I don’t know what you’re on about” you say feigning innocence shrugging your shoulders.
He shakes his head slightly, biting his lip gently.
“The ice lolly? The bikini you’ve now hidden under that cover up? That was nothing was it?” Chris says pulling at your cover up.
“I did say I was going to make you pay for throwing me in the pool” you point out not taking your eyes off of his “you’re not 100% innocent either” you add making him chuckle.
“You didn’t have to jump in the pool to cool off though” Chris points out.
“I’m just much better at this than you” you smirk.
Chris laughs shaking his head “you are trouble you know that right?” He says.
“And what you gonna do about it?” You ask biting your lip.
“Do you really wanna know?” He asks leaning closer smirking.
“100%” you whisper desperately wanting to close the small gap between your lips.
You could practically feel his breath on your skin, he could probably feel yours. If you were still breathing that is.
You hear a deep chuckle from Chris before his hand cups your cheek guiding your lips up to meet his. Your lips find the familiar rhythm as he pulls you up to stand with him.
As soon as you were stood up his hands find your hips squeezing them gently as he pulled you closer. As he did so you could feel the growing erection through his swim shorts. Making you moan slightly into his mouth. You feel him smirk into the kiss when he heard your reaction.
His hands move to your ass, he gives it a quick slap making you gasp and him to smirk. Your hands find the collar of his short leaved shirt he’d thrown on when everyone moved inside, pushing it off his shoulders and to the floor. He responds by grabbing your cover up and pulling it up off of you.
He grabs you by the hips and pulls you against him once more. You wrap your arms around his shoulders as he picks you up, wrapping your legs around his waist. The new angle allowing you to deepen the kiss, and you feel Chris groan as you roll your hips.
“You will be the death of me” Chris moans smirking as he looks at you eyes blown with lust.
“You better stop teasing then” you smirk pressing your lips against his lips quickly. His lips chasing yours as you pulled away.
“Don’t you worry about that” Chris smirks capturing your lips in his once more, carrying you to his bedroom.
Once in his room he threw you down on the bed causing you to squeal slightly. He climbed over you his knee between your thighs pushing them apart. He started kissing your jawline before moving down to your neck. You moaned rocking your hips against his thigh desperate for friction as his lips found your pulse point. His hand finds your hips holding them down firmly making you whine.
It was soon forgotten though as he started kissing your chest, making your back arch. He took advantage and untied your bikini pulling it off and throwing it to the side. He gazed down at your breast eyes blown before moving down to attack one with his mouth. You whimper as his tongue swirl around the sensitive peak arching your back to the point it could break. You could feel heat pooling at your core and you desperately wanted to rock your hips, but his hand stopped you.
Your hands run down his chest, you could feel his muscles tensing as your fingers ran over them. When your hands reach his swim shorts you palm his member through the fabric making him moan and roll his hips. You smirk in victory slightly before slipping your hands under the waistband, wrapping your fingers around his erection. You feel his breath hitch at the contact, you only got a few pumps in before his hand grabbed yours stopping you.
“I’m not gonna last long if you keep that up” he pants looking up at you with hooded eyes.
You smirk “I don’t mind that one bit” you tell him making him chuckle.
“I do though” he says grabbing your wrists and pinning them above your head with one hand.
He starts pressing kisses down your chest down to your navel and lower.
“Keep your hands there” Chris tells you as he removes his hand from your wrists, moving down to kneel between your legs.
His fingers hook in the waistband of your bikini bottoms pulling them off and throwing them over his shoulders.
He looks down at your glistening core, licking his lips. His eyes meet yours and he grins down at you before leaning down to press a light kiss to the inside of your thigh. You whimper at the feeling of his beard against your thigh.
“Chris-“ you choke out desperate for him to touch you where you needed him.
“What do you want sweetheart?” He asks glancing up at you.
“Please-“ you gasp your mind foggy.
“Use those words darlin’” he presses with a smirk making you groan.
“You. I need you” you whine.
You see Chris smirk before you feel his lips press against your core making you gasp and throw your head back. You feel the coil inside you tighten as he eats you out as if it was his last meal. You had to fight the urge to reach down and run your fingers through his hair to keep him there. When his he added his fingers to rub your clit in circular motions you came undone. Your orgasm crashes over you in waves as Chris continues his attack as you ride through it.
You feel your body grow limp underneath him as he climbs over you. He smiles down at you before pressing his lips against yours and your able to taste yourself on his lips. Your chest was still heaving as he started kissing your neck. You give in and wrapped your arms around him, when he doesn’t stop you, you run your hands down his body desperate to remove his trunks.
His hands meet yours, but he doesn’t stop you, he helps you push his shorts off. When you lay eyes on his member you gasp. If you thought Chris was impressive when you were younger, he was 100 times more impressive now. He catches you staring and caresses your cheek.
“You okay?” He asks.
You nod “yeah, I just-“ you say not being able to finish your sentence.
“We can leave-“ Chris says, and you instantly interrupt him.
“Don’t you dare stop” you tell him making him chuckle pressing his lips against yours.
He sits up, reaching over to his bedside table and grabbing a condom. He rips open the foil wrapper and rolls the condom on. Once done he moves over to kiss you again. You got lost in the euphoria of the kiss, that you were only pulled back by the feeling of his tip against your entrance.
You gasp as he slowly presses into you, you feel his completely fill you up to the point it almost hurt. The pain is quickly replaced by pleasure as he begins to slowly thrust inside you.
You moans meld together with his as he slowly picks up the pace. You grasp onto his back as it was the only thing you were able to make your limp limbs do. You could feel the coil within you beginning to tighten once more, and you try and hold yourself back.
“C’mon darlin’ come for me” Chris moans, he sits back lifting your leg over his shoulder allowing him to thrust deeper hitting that spot with every thrust.
You couldn’t hold on any longer, you come undone around him. You walls pulsating and clenching around him. You hear him groan at the sensation as continues to thrust inside you. He begins to stutter as he rides out his own orgasm.
When he was done he collapses on the bed beside you, both your chests heaving from the best orgasm you’ve ever had. Once his breathing returned to somewhat normal Chris gets up, removing and throwing away the condom. He soon returns with a wet cloth and you feel him begin to clean you up, your chest still heaving. Once he was done he returns to lay beside you, pulling you closer so you could rest your head on his chest.
“That was well worth the wait” you sigh looking up at him with a smile.
He smiles down at you before pressing his lips against yours for a sweet kiss.
“Well if you stick around there’ll be more where that came from” Chris smirks.
“Good because I don’t have any plans on going anywhere” you tell him cupping his cheek and kissing him once more.
“I love you” Chris sighs resting his forehead against yours.
“I love you more” you smile making him laughs.
“Impossible” he smiles kissing you once more.
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Series Masterlist / Masterlist
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Do My All
Pairing: Filipino!Reader x Bucky
Warnings: angst, mentions of blood, an insecure reader
This was nothing more than me trying to offer some comfort through writing my feelings away with our good ol’ Bucky Barnes. To anyone reading this, you are fucking loved, you matter, and there ARE people out here who cherish you, and acknowledge the things that you do for them. Happy reading babies ❤️
“Hello?” “How are you doing over there, anak? Pasensya ha? I was working when you called and I was tired so na tulog muna ako bago nagising ako. Kakatapos ng dinner dito sa bahay. Kumusta ka na?” (I’m sorry, I was working when you called and I was tired so I slept first before waking up. Dinner just finished here in the house. How are you now?)
The familiar cheery but tired voice of your mother had made you immediately tear up, heart aching as you imagined her robed form leaning against the dining table, trying her best to speak loudly and clearly in hopes that you hear her. “Oh, ma, it’s nothing. I just missed you.” You manage to crack out before tears have started to flow down your cheeks. “I was feeling off today at work. Lagi nasa office na ako, gusto ko nga sana magpunta sa mga missions kasama so co-workers ko. Nakakainis to, ma.” (I’m always at the office now, I wish I would be able to go on the missions with my co-workers. This is frustrating, ma.)
Your mom sighs on the other end. “Mag video-chat muna tayo ha?” (Let’s video chat)
You didn’t hesitate to press the FaceTime button on your phone, your face quickly appearing on the screen before your mother joins the call. As you imagined, her familiar robe was on her slumped and tired form. Being only to see the upper half of her face, you cracked a smile on your tear-stained face. “Ma, set the phone standing on the table. Lean it on something,” you say, laughing a little as your mom struggles a tad to do what you say, finding a big enough container to lean it against. “There we go,” you sniffed, a smile on your face as the sight of your mother calms you down.
“Bakit na iiyak ka naman, anak?” (Why are you crying again?) Your mother asks, worry being evident in her tone as you try to sniff and wipe your tears. “Anak, matagal talaga ng process nito, hindi ka pwede mg balik sa work field mo! Tapusin mo muna ng treatment mo!” (The process really is long, you cannot go back to your work field yet! Finish your physical therapy first!) Your mom urges, making you nod.
“I am, ma.”
“Oh, okay, good. Are you doing your exercises?”
“Oh, are you drinking your prescribed medicine?”
“Kaya gusto ko nga ikaw mag maging nurse eh! Mabuti nga may pera yun at hindi ka masasaktan katulad ngayon! Anak!” (This is why I wanted you to become a nurse! At least there’s good money and you don’t have to be hurt like you are right now!) Your mom’s voice raises slightly as worry fills her once again.
“Ma, I promise, it’ll be okay. I’m just… homesick and wanting to work again that’s all.”
Your mom sighs, wishing she could do more to ease your worries, both the spoken and unspoken. “You better be better by the time I’m on vacation anak, that way we can be all together again. Okay? I know you can do it, you are strong. You are beautiful and talented. I…” She sighs, looking down and shaking her head. “As much as I would have liked you to become a nurse, I know you do your job well. You are protecting us, the world. I know you are doing your best. Don’t let this stop you, okay? Alam mo I’m a phone call away. Okay?”
You smile at her reassurance, thanking her while you notice she’s trying to fight her sleep despite being a couple of hours behind you. “I know. I’m trying to remember that,” you sigh. “Matulog ka, ma. Pagod ka pa, baka hindi maganda ng tulog mo kanina. Tawagan ko kita bukas.” (Ma, go to sleep, you might have not rested well early. I will call you tomorrow.) You try your best to keep a smile on your face as she nods tiredly, offering you her heartwarming smile back at you.
“Okay… you take care, okay?” you hear her say, you nod in response. “Good. You sleep soon too. You need the proper rest. I love you okay?”
You nod again, another smile on your face. “Yes, ma. Goodnight. Love you. Love you bye,” You say by habit before you both end the call. You sigh and shake your head, opting to rest your head on your arms, which were folded on your desk.
“Just five minutes,” You sniff, letting the tears fall on your now tear stained sleeves. You missed your family, especially your mom greatly. You couldn’t get over having to heal yourself completely on your own time without your mother nursing you back in shape. Time going by, you never were over how you don’t come home to your family as often. You were never over how they can no longer be there all the time to ground you at low points like this. You wanted to be enough for them, enough for the time, enough for you. That wish had repeated itself in your head as exhaustion had come over you, allowing yourself to fall asleep.
It wasn’t long until Bucky came to check up on you in your office, something he didn’t admit to enjoy doing. He knocked lightly on your door and came in after no response. “Sweetheart, are you okay? How are you with your paperwork?” His questions were left unanswered as he had met your sleeping form, slumped on the desk. He chuckled a little, quietly approaching you, only to freeze when he noticed that there were tears down your face. Then some that had stained your oversized sweater. He sighed to himself, knowing very well why you were in this situation.
With no hesitation, he began to grab your phone and earbuds, putting them into his pocket before gently and quietly carrying your body bridal style in his arms. After another lookover for items he hadn’t picked up, he walked out of your office, went into the elevator and pressed the button to your floor in the compound. He watched your face, sighing as he watched you breathe steadily, head nuzzled against his body. He sighs, wishing that he was able to do this with you more often, hopefully in better circumstances as he walks out the elevator and towards your room. He wished he could have done more, make his presence known to you more often, and hopefully even his feelings can be out and open.
He laid you down with extra care, tucking you in bed gently as your body instinctively curled up, wincing slightly as you felt your healing wound. “Careful, sweetheart, we don’t want that wound opening up.” He whispers to you, bending down to comb your hair carefully out of your face, tucking the strands behind your ear ever so gently. “There you go,” he smiles, watching as your body relaxes to his touch, a reminder of your constant statement that you were indeed comfortable with the ex-assassin. He gently wiped your tears before standing upright, taking in your beautiful sleeping form one more time.
“You’re workin’ yourself too hard. That’s why we don’t want you to go back in the field yet,” he whispers to you, the image of you post mission in his head. He remembered how you had stood in front of Bucky in your last mission, seeing as a member of Hydra remained hidden, his gun aimed at Bucky. Before he had the chance to deflect it, he had seen your form falling, hands holding onto your side as you fell on the ground. He remembered how quickly you lost blood, and the anger he felt when he had shot that remaining member down. He remembered that nervousness that overtook him as he carried you into the quinjet.
“I had it under control! We only had to do this one quick search through the HYDRA facility and then leave! A mere bullet wouldn’t do anything to me, sweetheart! You know that!” Bucky yelled at you, nearly seeing white from the sight of your bleeding side as you were slumped against the wall of the quinjet.
“I’m sorry, alright?! It was aiming at your heart, Buck! I was worried!”
“And you think I’m not?! Sweetheart, your form these past few missions has been failing!”
“Buck,” Steve tries to intervene, but it falls on deaf ears as Bucky continues to have his say.
“And you have been off at training when we spar, you have started to make impulsive decisions-”
“BECAUSE I WANT TO PROTECT EVERYONE ON THIS TEAM!” You shout with almost all of your energy, trying your hardest to keep your breathing even as you feel the all too familiar pressure on your chest as well as the dizziness. You didn’t want to fight your best friend, not now. You didn’t want to let him down either. You were slowly realizing as you fought for consciousness, that no matter what you were doing, you weren’t doing enough to be adequate for your team.
“YOU ARE NOT PROTECTING SHIT, Y/N, YOU ARE BEING RECKLESS AS HELL! YOU KNOW WHAT YOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN YOURSELF INTO?!”
“Bucky!” Steve tries to intervene, hand on his shoulder. “Enough! Let Romanoff examine the wound while you calm dow-”
“Shit!” The two men snap their heads, seeing Natasha hold onto your now unconscious form.
Bucky didn’t realize that his own tears were falling down his cheeks, remembering the panic he felt, the guilt, the worry, the blame, everything. He remembered watching Steve carry you into med bay, the glare that Sam had sent his way. He remembered how Wanda had told him what you had been feeling the moment he started to yell at you in the quinjet. The thought of him knowing that he had been a part of triggering your panic attack as well as your wound had him feel nothing more than a monster.
He had realized he was in the wrong. You were only trying to protect him. You were trying to protect everyone.
“I’m sorry,” Bucky whimpered, not caring that you were seeing him in a vulnerable state like this. You could only force a smile as you reached for his metal hand, grasping it as firmly as you could, rubbing your thumb against his knuckles.
“I get it, I do. I have been reckless,” you start off, sighing as you keep your eyes on your intertwined hands. “These are simply the consequences. Tony told me I’m gonna be off of missions for an extra month after recovery.”
“But it was my-”
“It’s not your fault. It’s mine. Don’t blame yourself, Buck. I'd do the same if I was in your shoes.”
“Why couldn’t you tell me you were feeling the way you did?” He asks you, hoping that your eyes would be able to meet his. Your eyes remain glued to your interlocked hands.
“You had a lot on your plate, Buck.”
“But we’re supposed to be best friends, aren’t we? What am I, chopped liver?” He sighs, “You know damn well I’ve been in a situation like yours, let me help you, or even at the very least be there for you.”
Your eyes finally meet his. “You’ve gone through too much, Buck. I won’t make you feel what you have felt for decades again. No.”
“Then let me at least check up on you.”
And so that’s what he’s been doing throughout your recovery time. Making sure you weren’t doing strenuous exercises, doing paperwork at your own pace, even asking Steve to find another Avenger to fill him in for some missions. He had tried his all to not leave your side. Was he doing it for you? Or for him? Maybe both.
“God, it would have been easier to take care of you and explain my reasoning if you knew how I felt about you. If you know why I’m so worried. I’m a terrible person for lashing at you the way I did. I’m sorry. I should have listened to you more. I’m sorry.” He thinks.
He sighs, wiping his tears away before telling you goodnight and making his way out of your room.
He turns around. Instead of seeing you sound asleep, he sees your eyes staring right at his, glistening as tears once again threaten to fall. He could never say no to you. He goes to your bed, laying on his side facing you. “Have you been awake?” He asks, you shake your head.
“Heard you crying, why?”
He couldn’t help the way his lips curled up a tad. You always were worried about him. “Nothin’' He lies, combing your hair. Another mistake on his end.
“Well, why were you crying earlier?” He asks, trying to point the topic off of him.
“Don’t wanna talk about it too much,” you whisper with a sigh, “just miss ma, mad at the fact I can’t go on missions, hate that I’ve been reckless-”
“Don’t do that. Don’t put yourself down like that.” He cuts you off, tears already stinging his eyes. He hated seeing you beat yourself down this way. “Don’t do that when you know damn well you’re tryna protect people. I should be thanking you for doin’ what you did.”
Your mouth opened before closing right after, opting not to fight him back on it. You were too tired. “You know I care about you right?” You whisper. If it weren’t for the fact that Bucky had good hearing, he wouldn’t have thought you didn’t talk at all.
“I know. You know that I do too, right?” He watches you look up at him, smiling a bit with teary eyes.
“Hard to believe sometimes, but it’s nice to hear.” Is what you reply.
“Mmm… gonna do my all to prove to you how much I do.” He says with determination, nodding as that had become his set goal. You smile a bit and merely hum sleepily in response. Something in Bucky urged him to lift his hand and caress your soft cheeks with his fingertips, watching as you relax to his touch again, eyes fluttering shut as the repeated action eventually made you fall asleep. Bucky sighs, wishing he could have the courage to tell you what has been sitting in his heart for the past two years. However, the sight of you relaxing to him despite the recent events and the fact that you wanted him to stay for the night will do for the time being.
“Gonna do my all to show you how much I love you, Gonna do my all to show you just how I see you. Gonna do my all to make you know that you are more than enough. Gonna do everythin’ to make you feel like the most loved dame there is, I promise.”
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“Admit you’re adorable and this all stops”
“Admit you’re adorable and this all stops...” Sam sang as he was mercilessly tickling your ribs.
“GEHEHET OFF ME PIHIHIGEON!” you screamed in an attempt to bat his hands away, but it was no use until you gave him what he wanted. He knew you would rather die than admit that you were anything close to adorable, which gave him a perfect excuse to tickle you to bits.
“Pigeon? That’s how we’re playing? Fine by me...” he said, switching his attack to your armpits, effectively causing you to clamp your arms down and trap his hands; it was just what he wanted.
“WAITWAITWAIT I TAKE IT BAHAHAHACK! IHIM ADORABLE IM ADORABLE!” He had to laugh at how desperate you were for him to stop before he finally relented, leaving a limp you to recover from the torture you had just endured.
“I’m just giving you a break, by the way...” You looked at him with furrowed eyebrows. “What? You think you could call me pigeon and get away with it? Yeah, right.”
“Oh hell no!” you responded, immediately getting up and running away from a vengeful Sam.
The next fifteen minutes were a game of chase, you, unfortunately, being on the losing end.
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Ever Since We Met
Pairing: Loki x reader
Series Summary: After making a bet with Odin, Loki finally has a chance to prove he is worthy of being heir to the throne. Under mysterious circumstances, you find yourself stranded on Asgard, left with no option but to team up with Loki and help him win the crown. Now posing as visiting royalty, you must be careful of rumors in court that say you’re not who you claim, all while battling your growing feelings for the raven haired king. But some things are easier said than done because secrets, you’ll soon learn, can be deadly.
Chapter Summary: With nothing to do after your last meeting with the advisers, Loki suggests a cure for your boredom.
Chapter Warnings: none I believe
A/N: This has one of my favorite moments from the series in it! Happy reading :)
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⚜︎ Masterlist | << Prev┇Next >> | Beginning ⚜︎
Disclaimer: Gif not mine
The excitement of having something to do was very short-lived, and soon you were back to wallowing in boredom, as seemed to be a trademark of your visit to Asgard. Unfortunately, today was one of the days you had to spend time with the nobles of court. And, ok, it was at least something to do, but you always wanted to pull your hair out by the time it was over. It wasn’t really much of a cure for boredom, either.
Loki had been more engaged again recently. Ever since he promised to try, he really had been giving it his all. Sadly, in the last two weeks since your meeting with his advisors, Loki had been very busy with other tasks. So even if he was putting in an effort, you hardly got to see each other. There was, at least, dinner every night, and the walk back to your room, but you couldn’t speak as freely as either of you would have liked, lest you be caught out of character.
Most nights when you were already in bed, half asleep, he’d stumble in through the passage, equally exhausted but still in his clothes from the day, having just finished up some task or another. Tired as you were, you’d sit up and talk with him for a bit, and he’d share whatever was on his mind at the moment. Sometimes it was a great triumph or small accomplishment. Others, it was a failure or a roadblock in his path. You were there to weather the highs and lows with him, especially the nights when his anxiety made his hands shake, and he couldn’t stop wringing them in an attempt to hide it. You would grab them then, hold them and play with his fingers. It seemed to help.
Then he’d ask about your day, listening intently as you recounted it. When you were done talking, he’d praise your good work, sympathize with the difficulty of monotonous conversations in court, and give advice when you asked for it. Then you would thank him through a yawn, prompting him to tell you to get some rest. You would ask him to please get some sleep too, but more often than not he had some paperwork to finish up. Loki promised he would get some sleep as soon as it was done, but you were pretty sure that most nights he only got a couple hours of sleep, if any.
Before he left, he would tuck you in and caress your cheek or kiss the back of your hand. As much as that made you happy, you wished he’d kiss you more than in just that way. You wanted to feel his lips pressed to your own as your hearts joined together. But you wouldn't tell him that and risk scaring him off. You’d just have to learn to be happy with having him at all. Every night he walked away, and you regretted not asking him to stay with you. But again, it was the same thing; if he didn’t want to, it could make everything awkward. So as you laid alone in your bed, you would remember the one time you had asked, how he had stayed. And it was with that in mind that you always found yourself drifting off to sleep.
There was still a good bit of day to get through until you would be able to share those soft moments with him, though. No, right now you had to deal with Fandral calling after you before you could peacefully scurry away to your room. You’d been avoiding him and his ego as much as you could, but had no such luck today. One of the few other times you hadn’t managed to dodge him, he’d introduced you to his friends: Sif, Volstagg, and Hogun. All together, they were better known to the public as the Warriors Four, Thor’s closest allies. Of course that also meant they didn’t seem to be the biggest fans of Loki, or at very least the idea of him winning the throne. Not that they ever said it outright, but you were able to read in between the lines.
Once Fandral reached you, he bowed and flashed what you supposed was meant to be a charming grin.
“And how is our most beautiful, distinguished guest today?” he asked after greeting you.
“I am quite well,” you lied. “Thank you. And how are you?”
“Much the same as you,” he replied. “I do not suppose you would like to join me in the courtyard and watch me train again?”
You had accompanied him once before and absolutely hated it. His so-called training was just a series of attempts between him and his friends to one-up each other. It was so tedious to have to stand there, oohing and aahing and clapping as if you were impressed. Alright, to be completely fair, some of it actually was impressive, but their superiority complexes basically took away any awe you may have felt in watching them.
And then there was the fact that Loki had passed by, smiling from a distance until he recognized who your companions were. You were pretty sure you saw a flash of jealousy cross his features, but he quickly dispelled it, most likely remembering what you’d said about not much enjoying your time spent with them. Every once in a while they said something genuinely funny or interesting, but nowhere near often enough to make it all worth it.
As Loki had gotten closer, Volstagg had invited him to join in their training. He declined, though, saying he had some duties to attend to. Still, you saw something in his eyes, a look that said a part of him wanted to show off for you too, that he was irked he had to let them have all the glory. But even as he moved away, you thought about him. About how he probably had a much more graceful fighting style. About how his lean muscles would have mesmerizingly rippled in the sunlight as he sliced the air. All of that made you quite flustered, a reaction that Fandral regrettably thought was because of him.
“I appreciate the invitation, but I am feeling quite fatigued right now,” you feigned. “I was going to retire to my rooms to rest for a spell.”
“Oh! Have no worries! I shall escort you to your rooms so you make it there safely. Unless you would like to come to my rooms?” he not-so-subtly hinted, wiggling his eyebrows. It made you want to gag.
“No, mine will suit me just fine,” you curtly replied, beginning to walk away.
Still, he escorted you as he said he would, talking along the way. It wasn’t much of an actual conversation, of course. Mainly Fandral just regaled you with his highly hyperbolized tales of his battles and feats. By some miracle, you were able to fake interest the whole time. Hurriedly, you bid him goodbye and closed the door practically in his face.
Finally alone, you sprawled out on your couch, grabbing a pillow and hugging it. There were still a few hours until dinner, and you were expecting your friends to stop by at some point soon. Asta and Sidra had been teaching you how to play some card game or other. You were slowly catching on, though you had yet to win. Checking the time, you saw there was still half an hour before any of them would be here, even if Ro had made it a habit to come a little bit earlier than the rest to have a chance to chat alone with you. It was sweet, and they’d become like a little sibling to you. You guessed you could go find any one of your friends now, start spending time with them earlier than planned. However, Loki was supposed to be relatively free now, just in his office taking care of some things. And you didn’t have anything to do. So if you both had some free time, why not spend it together?
You walked over to the hidden passage and pushed open the heavy door. The only other time you’d been inside was when Loki had carried when you were sick. The realization that you had never used it of your own accord gave you a pause. Maybe he wouldn’t want you to. There was only one way to find out. So, one deep breath later, you were on your way over.
Arriving on the other side in his drawing room, you closed the door behind you. It seemed like he wasn’t in his office like expected, though. Moving toward his open bedroom door, you called, “Hey, Lok-”
You cut out mid-sentence as he walked out of his bathroom, only covered by a towel tied around his waist. Some water rolled down his neck, drawing your attention there and then to his toned chest. His hair was framing his face, still weighed down by water instead of being styled back like usual.
“Oh! I, uh- Sorry,” you squeaked, turning around. Loki laughed in reply. You pouted, “What’s so funny?”
“Well, my little mortal has finally come to visit me,” he answered. You realized it meant he was aware of the fact you hadn’t chosen to use the passage yet, though you’d just realized that yourself. “Plus, I seem to recall you being the one to be worried about a situation like this, one where I would walk in on you in such a state. I do not much care, to be honest. Everything important is covered. Besides, I... I trust you.”
All any of that did was serve to make you more flustered than you already were. Besides one small peek over your shoulder, you refused to turn around. No matter how good he looked, you’d rather not embarrass yourself any further.
“Um, wow! Thanks. I- I trust you too, by the way,” you added.
“Well then, what brings you here, anyway?” he asked. “You are feeling alright, correct?”
“Mhm. Just bored. Even if it’s just another meeting, I want something to do.”
“I see,” Loki replied. “I most certainly can arrange that. But what about something a bit more entertaining, too? I could take you for a walk in the gardens since you have yet to see them. Would you like that?”
You bit your lip to contain a smile. There was something about the uncertainty in his voice that you found adorable, the way he so kindly asked nearly melting your heart.
“I would love that, Loki. When, though? What should I do in the meantime?”
“Tonight. And you should get ready,” he said, coming up from behind and pressing his now clothed body against yours. He wrapped his arms around your waist, making you jump a little as you still had not been looking. “Because I will be wearing something much more appropriate than what you caught me in. Unless, of course, that disappoints you,” he joked in a low voice.
“What? No! Not to say you looked bad, because you looked really good—but, err, not in a weird way, of course! But, um, no- I mean, yeah! What I mean is, changing is fine. Or, uh, preferred,” you incoherently babbled, even more flustered than before.
“As you wish, my little mortal,” he chuckled.
You finally relaxed against him, his head coming to rest on your shoulder. Loki’s hot breath sent the good kind of shivers down your spine, his damp hair tickling your cheek. Your hands fell to cover his large ones, clasped over your stomach. Without realizing you were doing it, your thumb ran back and forth over his knuckles as you smiled at him in all his radiance.
“So shall we go after dinner then?” you checked.
The god shook his head. “Before. I will take care of it, make up some lie about taking my meal in my room and you feeling tired or unwell. That way everyone will be occupied, and we undisturbed.”
“That sounds perfect,” you dreamily sighed.
You fell into a comfortable silence standing there, held in his arms. Just like any other time you found yourself in a position similar to this, you began wishing he would never let go. You wondered if he might be thinking the same thing as he closed his eyes while still resting on your shoulder, enjoying the bliss of the moment. When he opened them, it seemed he came to a split second decision and, somewhat hesitantly, placed a very light, gentle kiss to your cheek. Naturally, that was enough to make you a mess again.
“Well, I suppose I had better let you go get changed then,” he said, releasing you, much to your chagrin. “I shall see you later, my little mortal.”
“Right!” you replied, dashing out of the room and to the passage before you said something you regretted. Like confessing your feelings. “See you later.”
As you walked back through the passage, you already began planning what you would wear for your date.
“Wait,” you said to yourself, stopping abruptly, your latest thought giving you a pause. “Date?!”
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Here’s part one. I’m super excited for this fic and there’s a lot of works building and research in it. I’ve written a few different ethnicities in here. Please call me out if I’ve gotten something wrong but I did do my research! Likes are great but reblogs and feedback are amazing! 🥰
Warnings: swearing, sarcasm, talks of sex work, Sweater Weather, girl in red, too many kids
Word Count: 4200+
Tony needs to stop recruiting children.
You rocked back and forward from your toes to your heels, smiling blandly at the gathering of superheroes. You weren't overly surprised to find Peter Parker who had paused in the act of bringing a spoonful of cereal to his mouth.
You had figured he was Spiderman quite some time ago but you had never really paid him much attention because of it, only as someone who MJ sometimes hung out with.
It was weird to see all of Earth's mightiest defenders going about their morning routine. Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes were making coffee while reading an actual, physical newspaper.
Natasha Romanoff and Clint Barton were lying on opposite sides of the couch with their legs tangled, tossing pieces of pancakes to each other.
Bruce Banner was reading from a tablet at the kitchen island, writing notes on a spare leaf of paper with one hand and sipping coffee from a mug in his other hand.
No one looked up beside Peter. Not until Tony cleared his throat loudly. Everyone glanced up in sync and then went back to what they were doing.
"Stop recruiting kids Tony." Steve sighed, sounding almost bored with Tony's antics. You looked from the supersoldier to the billionaire and back again, still rocking on your feet. Peter finally finished bringing the spoon to his mouth and chewed slowly on his cereal.
"Yeah Hugh Hefner part two. Stop recruiting us kids." You spoke up. Peter choked on his cereal and Bruce stopped writing his notes, looking up between you and Tony with his eyes narrowed.
"Hugh Hefner?" Bruce asked, clearly interested. Steve and Bucky shared a look that made you think they had no idea who Hugh Hefner was which was entirely possible when you thought about it.
"I'm just saying, I'll dance, sure. But the no touching rule still stands and all of you are rich enough that if I see any dollar bills I'm kicking you in the crotch." You shrug as if it's a normal everyday conversation and once again the whole team looks up at you again.
"Dollar bills? I didn't bring you here to dance." Tony shakes his head, not sure if your serious or not. He had no idea about what you got up to in your spare time and a job was a job.
"You didn't?" You ask, your eyebrows furrowed. You knew exactly why you were there, you just weren't willing to admit to that. You wanted to see how long you could run the gag.
"You a dancer?" Bucky looked up, from the paper. He didn't seem overly interested, just like he wanted to break the silence while Tony floundered for words.
"For you Mr. Winter Soldier sir, I revoke the no touching rule." You told him, hands clasped in front of you and eyelashes fluttering. You gave him your best smile and he rolled his eyes but couldn't fight his own grin.
"I didn't bring you to prostitute yourself out." Tony interrupted, clearly confused about the turn in the conversation. He shook his head like he was manually clearing his thoughts.
"Disappointing, I was excited to begin my stripping career." You sighed heavily, folding your arms against your chest and pursing your lips.
"What did you bring her for?" Peter asked curiously and you realized that he was about to learn a lot more about you than you wanted him to. He was safe, you knew just as much about him.
"To join the team Penis. Can't believe you're spiderman." You sighed and Peter flushed red but you weren't sure if it was the familiar nickname or his secret being outed.
"I'm not uh-" Peter tried to argue and you rolled your eyes at him, turning back to Tony who was looking between you both.
"You know Parker?" Tony asked, eyebrow raised. You wondered how he got to be as smart as he was. He literally had a printed copy of your resume in his hand that told him you were a senior in the very high school Peter was a junior in.
"Yeah, I mean I've known he was Spiderman for a while too but you know, you win some you lose some." You told them all and Peter's eyes almost bugged out of his head in shock.
"You knew?" Peter asked, his voice doubtful and you nodded, shrugging again. It hadn't been overly hard to figure it out.
"Dude, your class goes on a school trip and Spiderman just comes along? For a while I suspected MJ but then I realized she'd never let anyone presume it was a man saving people." You told Peter who processed the information fairly quickly only to nod.
"Men ain't shit," Peter told you all and you smiled, mirroring his nod. Everyone else watched the exchange with varying levels of confusion and curiosity. You did catch Natasha nodding along with Peter's statement.
"What is going on?" Bucky asked, looking from Tony to you and then to Peter. He looked like he felt left out and you almost felt bad.
"Well Mr. Winter Soldier, sir. Is that too formal? Should I call him Bucky, James seems a little anti-climatic. I'm never sure about made-up names or real names." You babbled, looking to Peter. He seemed the best fit to help you with your predicament.
"See! I told you this was going to be an issue one day. I'm not the only one." Peter looked as if he was relieved to finally have someone on his side with this. He was surrounded by a lot of old people.
"Parker-" Tony sighed but you didn't want this issue dismissed.
"Especially when it's the bad guys. Momma always told me to be polite and refer to people by their titles but does it count when they try to stab me?" You asked, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. You were genuinely unsure of what you needed to do.
"See! It should be an all or nothing kind of thing." Peter agreed, pointing his spoon at you as if you had just validated all his concerns about life.
"God, there's two of them now." Bucky sighed, taking a mouthful of coffee and pinching the bridge of his nose like this was the worst thing that could've happened.
"Why do people try to stab you?" Steve asked, ignoring his metal-armed companion who looked like he wished he'd never left his bed this morning.
"That's why I brought her here." Tony insisted.
"Because people stab her?" Natasha asked drily. She was still throwing pieces of pancake at Clint who continued to catch them despite neither of them looking at the other.
"Because they try too." Tony countered smugly, like that made his point. You were still watching Natasha's impeccable aim.
"Do you listen to girl in red?" You blurted, completely ignoring the ongoing conversation around you. You would've been embarrassed if you weren't so curious.
"Girl in red?" Natasha asked, almost confused. You supposed that was as close to expressing emotion she got around strangers.
"I'll settle for Sweater Weather." You told her honestly, clenching your fists where they were tucked under your arm. She still looked confused and you pouted knowing that probably meant no.
"You know I wondered about that too," Peter told you, looking Natasha over with a critical eye. She glared back at him and he seemed to realize that analyzing the assassin so closely was probably not that wise.
"I listen to sweater weather," Bucky spoke up quietly, sending you a timid smile. You considered his words carefully, in awe of how he was advancing with the time.
"What can that metal hand do?" You asked, a smirk on your lips. It shocked almost everyone in the room. Peter and Bucky laughed while Tony sounded like he was being choked.
"What age are you?" Bucky asked and you knew he was just humoring him. You weren't overly bothered, you didn't care too much about the old man.
"18 years, seven months, and three days. which means I'm legal." You teased, pursing your lips in an effort to contain your laugh.
"Come back to me in a century," Bucky told you and you nodded, considering his words before shrugging.
"You're not my type anyway, where's Wanda? I wanna think about kissing her like I don't know she can read minds and then see how she reacts." You told the room.
"Wanda, really?" Peter asked, tilting his head to the side as he considered your words.
"Big tiddy goth gf, keep up Parker." You sighed like the weight of the world was on your shoulders.
"Goth?" Peter asked,
"Emo? I don't know. I work with what I'm given." You finally uncrossed your arms to throw them up in exasperation.
"Why is she here, Tony?" Natasha sighed, bored of the conversation diversion.
"I ship you with Wanda." Peter interrupted again and you smiled brightly at him.
"Meet Conscience." Tony introduced and you wrinkled your nose in distate. You didn't like that one at all. It was tough to spell.
"Huh, Tony's always needed one of those." Bucky joked and you rolled your eyes, knowing that your name would become a pun all around if you let him get away with it.
Hit Bucky. Hard.
No one but you could see the dark ink of your unspoken words, how they floated out with your breath and through the air, jumping atom to atom in quick succession until they reached Steve. They floated up and in with Steve's breath and in the next instant, he reached out, winding Bucky with a punch that put everyone on the offense.
Make him sorry for that.
Bucky reacted without thought, tackling Steve across the kitchen island and into the back of the sofa, knocking Natasha and Clint off with the force. The pair of them rolled around for a minute while Tony watched on with an amused smile.
Natasha made you do it.
Both super soldiers turned on the assassin and she looked between them both, gun cocked and aimed already. "Stop it, whatever it is that you're doing, stop."
You inhaled deeply, drawing the words back in with purpose and both soldiers dropped their fighting stance, turning to look at each other. Bucky looked more shook, his shoulder dropping and his breath coming quickly. You felt almost bad for invading his mind like that.
"What the hell was that?" Peter asked, still eating his cereal but with wider eyes this time. Everyone else in the room was watching you warily.
"You think I've been passing Calculus on my own?" You asked with a scoff, rolling your eyes.
"You're not passing calculus." Peter reminded you. He only knew as much because MJ was doing her best to tutor you because you were a fucking idiot. That wasn't something you wanted everyone to know.
"Welcome to my villain origin story." You sighed, glaring at Peter. "We gotta be on the same side here Parker otherwise I'll have to tell everyone about Flash."
"Did I say you weren't passing Calculus? I should have said you were top of the class." Peter rushed out, cheeks turning pink at the reminder of his biggest enemy and Spiderman's biggest fan.
"I thought as much." You smirked proudly.
"Are we going to talk about it?" Steve asked, his hand rubbing gentle circles into Bucky's back. The Soldier was still hunched over, looking defeated.
"I'm the little voice in your head." You told him with a shrug, like it should've been obvious. "You do as I say and you don't question it, ever."
"What's to stop you from using it against us?" Bucky asked and you looked to Tony.
"Our alliance, supposedly." You told him skeptically. "Tony is an idealist."
"I caught the kid using it to get an internship here. Jarvis picked up on it." Tony told them. "She wasn't trying to hide it."
"Didn't expect a robot in the ceiling. I'll be more subtle." You assured them all.
"I don't trust her." Bucky sighed, his breath still coming just this side of too quick to be normal for him.
"Good, don't do that." You told him honestly before sighing. "But also my mom says I'm not allowed use it for harm. Or to convince celebrities to marry me."
"Your mom says?" Natasha asked bitingly, her words intending to sting. "Your promise to your mommy is what's keeping you on good behavior."
"Fucking right it is." You lied through your teeth. "My mom is scarier than every villain you've ever faced."
"Language." Steve sighed almost automatically and you grimaced.
"Is he serious?" You asked Peter who nodded, pointing to a jar full of coins on top of the fridge.
"We've got a swear jar." Peter confirmed.
"Man, that's kind of weird. How much per swear?" You asked, patting your empty pockets.
"25 cents." He told you and you winced.
"Damn, better start dancing. Remember ladies, gents, and non-gendered folks, no dollar bills, and I get to pick the music." You pointed a finger at them all warningly.
"Shame. I was going to suggest gangam style." Peter laughed and you looked at him like he was an idiot.
"Bold of you to assume it isn't top of my list." You told him, the 'duh' in your tone coming unsaid. "But you're a minor so you'll have to wait for your birthday."
"We still need to talk about it," Bruce spoke up and you shook your head.
"Nah, cause I ain't interested. I just wanted a paid internship. I haven't got time for Nazis unless I'm studying them. God bless, goodbye. Call me Bucky." You waved a hand, ducking from the room without a backward glance, and headed for the elevator.
You stood in the doorway, hands braced on the frame of the door to support yourself, and met the eye of all the agents lined up to invade your home. They had weapons to the ready but must have been drastically misinformed because they hesitated to shoot at you. Their mistake.
Leave. There is no threat here. Leave.
You used your deepest breath yet to send the message, exhaling until you were almost blue in the face. It worked and the agents turned and made their way through the corridor and back to the stairs. You stood in the doorway watching and waiting for them all to disappear in the uniform lines they maintained.
"Are they gone?" You looked over your shoulder to find everyone watching you from behind the living room door where you had put them after pulling them from their beds. It was the safest option because if anything went wrong there was a fire escape. You shut the door of the apartment, leaning against it heavily as a wave of dizziness washed over you. It took a second for your vision to focus on the terrified faces looking back at you.
"Yeah, back to bed, you know the rules." You sighed, recovering your breath. You didn't inhale too deeply, letting the words linger in the Agent's mind. You didn't want to accidentally withdraw the message, hoping it would sink in and they wouldn't return to bother you.
"Will you read us another story?" You sighed again and nodded when Rìa spoke, pushing yourself up off the door. The little girl came out from behind the door, clutching her twin brother's hand in hers and you smiled as comforting as you could at them both. They were the third youngest at only eight years of age and needed constant reassurance that things were alright.
You paused for a second making sure you were steady before walking everyone back to the first bedroom. The apartment you had boasted three bedrooms, one for the boys and one for the girls but more often than not everyone congregated in your room. You had to get a bed big enough to fit all nine of you at once. It was a tight squeeze but you made it work.
Usually, it involved little two-year-old Tommy curling up on your chest, four-year-old Moe under your left arm, balancing precariously on the edge of the bed. Next to you on your right, Rìa shuffled close and on her other side was her twin brother, Lou, who was never far away. He was pressed against Liza who was sixteen. Bo, a ten-year-old, was always more comfortable with Liza and so was usually strewn across her lap, trying to maintain contact at all times.
Which left Josef, the eldest besides you at seventeen years old, with twelve-year-old Edith who practically lived in his shadow, hovering in his orbit most of the time. There you read everyone's favorite. The Owl and the Pussycat. When you finished the poem the room descended into silence, as much as was possible with nine bodies packed tightly together.
You were just beginning to drift off when there was a knock at the front door. Only Josef heard it besides you and he gave you a warning look as you manoeuvred your way out of the pile of children that surrounded you.
"Go to sleep. Everything was fine." Agent's didn't knock and you had a fair idea of who it was. You were going to have to deal with your issues head-on, just like you always had. You closed the door most of the way over, leaving just the slightest crack in the doorway.
When you opened the door Tony invited himself in, eyes assessing the apartment before landing on you. You were exhausted and he could tell just from looking at you. You did your best to hide it but something was waring you down and he hoped you were close to giving into his offer.
"Pretty effective way to deal with Shield." He told you, hands shoved in his pocket, a frown on his face as he took in the toys scattered around the apartment.
"That was Shield? What the hell were they doing here?" You asked, already knowing the answer to your question. You wanted him to admit that he had fucked up, that he had released your secret.
"It seemed that landing yourself on my radar landed them on yours." Tony shrugged, arms out wide like you'd believe his open body language.
"No, you put me on their radar. You fuckin' moron." You snapped your voice still quiet so as not to disturb the kids
"Excuse me, I didn't waltz into Sta- Avengers Tower and start using my weird witchy powers on unsuspecting citizens-" A sharp cry interrupted Tony's rant and you looked up in fear. Little Thomas had managed to get out past the older kids and was now standing with his arms raised for you to pick him up.
"You need to leave, now. Don't make me use it." You told Tony, scooping Thomas into your arms and rubbing a hand against his back in circles to calm him. You didn't acknowledge him but Tony's burning gaze held all the questions you would never answer.
"You're not going to mention the kid?" He asked and you blinked at him, face impassive.
"You don't see a kid. Because if you saw a kid I'd have to make sure you forgot him and me." You warned, deathly quiet.
"I don't see a kid." He agreed, hands up defensively.
"You need to leave. Now." You warned again, rocking the little boy who was lying against your shoulder.
"Come to the tower, we can keep you both safe." Tony urged and you fought down a derisive snort at the thought of packing up your eight kids and moving them into Avengers Tower. Of course, he had no idea what he was offering.
"Get out of my house and stay out of my life. If you've got a file on me get rid of it. I'm asking once, nicely. I won't ask again, I'll tell you to do it next time." You told him, walking to the door and opening it pointedly.
"We've got room for-" He tried but you only glared harder at him.
"No, you don't. Get lost." He left, his shoulder slumped and a sigh leaving his lips as he passed you.
"Alright, emergency protocols, let's get your things together. If it doesn't fit in your bag then let it go." You had woken everyone up once Tony had left the building and begun packing your bag. This was the third time you had all been through an emergency move but the younger kids weren’t sure what to do.
"I'm tired." Moe whined, running his eyes. His hair was standing up on his head and he was clutching his blanket tightly in his hands, fighting off a massive yawn.
"I know Pappu, I'm so sorry." You told him, kneeling down to his height. He pressed into your warmth, yawning again and nuzzling you neck as you ran hands up and down his back to comfort him.
"Are we in trouble?" Edie asked softly and you looked over Moe’s shoulder. She already had her bag packed and was working on helping Joey pack his. You felt awful for dragging them through this again but it was better than the alternative.
"No, we're in danger. We need to go and now. Liza, can you bring Tommy and Edie? Joey, I need you to get Moe and Ria. I'll worry about Lou and Bo." You released Moe to Joey who ushered the little boy to get changed and pack his toys away before they got lost.
"What happened? Was that Tony Stark, did you get the job?" Joey asked as he stuffed pyjamas into a bag small enough for Moe to carry. He added the rest to his own bag, knowing not to over load the young boy.
"No, we had a difference of opinion. He wanted me to work in communications." You told them all, folding clothes quickly and adding them to your duffel bag.
"You are very good at getting your point across." Liza told you as if you should reconsider and you knew why she wanted you to settle down in a job. The kids needed stability and it was become less and less likely.
"Yeah well, not for him." You muttered zipping up your bag and moving to help Bo pack hers as quickly as possible. You weren't sure how long it would be before Shield was back.
"You could be a superhero." Ría cheered, bouncing on the bed while holding on tightly to Lou's sleeve.
"I don't think so, Nena. Sounds like a lot of work." You told her with a grin, scooping her off the bed and kissing her cheeks until she laughed.
"Would you have to be gone all the time?" Lou asked quietly from the bed and you nodded at him.
"I would, Nene and I most certainly wouldn't be able to keep all of you with me." You never sugar coated things for the kids. No one had ever told them the truth but you always would.
"Then don't." Josef told you, looking up from where he was packing a bag. You'd known Josef since you were four and he was three. You'd both been fostered together at the same time and had yet to be separated from each other. You'd die before you let anyone separate you from any of the kids in the room.
"I didn't even consider it." You promised him and he flashed you a pearly white smile, finishing up his packing.
"Where you been?" Peter popped up over your shoulder and you jumped, pressing a hand to your heart.
"Disneyland, my mom surprised us all with a holiday." You told him with a shrug, continuing to scan the vending machine for anything remotely enticing.
"Damn, she just pulled you out of school like that?" Peter asked, jaw dropped.
"Swear jar, Penis." You sighed, putting in your selection and scowling when your KitKat got stuck. Typical.
"Don't call me that." He huffed and you gave up on getting your candy bar, turning to face Peter.
"Don't swear. How would Cap feel to know you've got a potty mouth?" You teased, passing him to cut through the corridor.
"I'm almost eighteen." He told you petulantly.
"So?" You asked, pushing out the main entrance of the building.
"I can swear if I damn well want to." He told you and you clicked your tongue.
"I'm telling. I'm so telling. I'm gonna call Tony right now and tell on you." You pulled your phone from your pocket and Peter's face paled.
"You wouldn't." He challenged.
"Try me, Parker." You tossed right back.
"I'll introduce you to Wanda if you don't." He countered, a smirk on his lips.
"I don't want to meet Wanda. They say never meet your heroes, you'll just get disappointed." You told him with a dramatic sigh.
"She's pretty cool." Peter shrugged and you rolled your eyes.
"She's pretty. That's enough for me." You told him, aware he was still following you, despite the fact he was cutting class to do so.
"That's objectification." He argued and you laughed.
"You're objectification." You told him in return.
"You're a child." He muttered, kicking a rock along the ground in front of him.
"Don't you have class to get to?" You asked, finally looking up to meet his eye.
"I think as the senior, you should be more worried about getting to class." He said and you nodded. He was right but you wouldn't let him be.
"Penis, I swear to god-" You held up your phone again and he raised his hands defensively.
"Alright, I'm going, I'm going." He turned back the way you both came with a laugh.
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Everybody Loves Somebody - Three
Summary: As an author, you spend a lot of time in your apartment. So does your mysterious next-door neighbor, who’s either always watching TV or away from home for weeks at a time. You’ve never seen or spoken to him, but one day in a particularly rough bout of writer’s block, you decide to leave some cookies and a note outside his door. You never could have expected what would come next...
(A/N: We’ve had shy Bucky, and now it’s time for domestic Bucky! ...with a surprise guest at the end)
One | Two | Three
“Good morning, good morning! We’ve talked the whole night through. Good morning, good morning to you!”
Rolling over, you silenced the alarm and sat up. With a yawn, you pushed off the covers and stood up. Peeking out the window beyond the curtains, you found a somewhat dreary day. Rain fell across the city, drops sliding down the glass in front of you.
You didn’t mind all that much, though. Rain was cozy, contemplative.
Stepping back from the window, you did a sun salutation anyway, stretching up and down before heading to the bathroom for a shower.
Washed and dressed, you were listening to the morning news and cooking up some breakfast when you heard the usual knock on your front door. Three short taps, not too loud, but not so quiet you couldn’t hear it. The smile that spread across your face at the sound was becoming involuntary at this point.
“Come in!” You called.
You didn’t turn around at the sound of the door opening and shutting, focusing on stirring the pot of oatmeal you were working on instead.
“You letting in everybody who knocks as easy as that?”
Glancing over your shoulder, you saw Bucky leaning casually against the counter, the morning’s newspaper tucked under his arm. But there was a slight edge to his voice, matching the concerned furrow of his brow.
“Nobody really comes knocking except for you,” You shrugged, mischief tugging at the corner of your lips. “Plus, assassins don’t usually knock before they come in, right?”
He huffed, setting his hands on his hips in a gesture that’s supposed to be annoyed, but you can see the twinkle of amusement in his eyes.
“Off-duty assassins, maybe.” He muttered, shaking his head.
“Yes, well, do off-duty assassins know where the bowls are?” You asked, turning off the burner. “This is about ready to dish up, I think.”
Bucky didn’t need to be told twice, dropping the paper on the counter before maneuvering past you easily to grab two bowls out of the cabinet. He set them down on the counter next to the stove, the golden details of his metal hand flashing in the light of your kitchen.
The sight of it sent a small spark of pride through your chest, as it always does. He stopped wearing the gloves around you about a week earlier, a sign of trust you hadn’t taken lightly.
You started dishing out the steaming oatmeal, raisins and apples and cinnamon mixed in. Bucky moved around you again, reaching for another cabinet to get out the brown sugar before retrieving the milk and maple syrup out of the fridge.
You liked to joke that he knew your kitchen better than you did. You’d been living there for years and yet you would sometimes stop short in the midst of making some pasta or mixing up a batch of bread dough, completely blanking on where that one spatula was…only for Bucky to move in this silent way, reaching around you to open the right drawer and pull out exactly what you needed.
“Did that serum give you telepathy too?” You’d tease, nudging him with your hip.
“Sure doll,” He’d chuckle a little, crossing his arms and leaning back against the counter again as you got back to work. “Hearing all that noise in your head is why I can’t sleep at night, you know.”
“Oh please,” You’d roll your eyes, tapping your temple “You wish you knew what brilliance is going on up here.”
Then he’d stare at you, holding your gaze with such intensity your spine went all tingly and for a moment you weren’t entirely sure he couldn’t hear your thoughts. And somehow, you couldn’t keep yourself from thinking just how beautiful blue his eyes were.
“You’re thinking...” He’d say after a long moment, a smug smirk . “How much you’d like to make me a batch of those chocolate chip cookies right now.”
You’d laughed, shoving him gently in the shoulder. “Nice try, Barnes.”
“Worth a shot.”
You smiled at the memory, grabbing two spoons and carrying the bowls over to the tall counter where Bucky was already perched on his usual chair. You set his bowl down in front of him and then hopped up onto the seat next to his.
The two of you ate in content, companionable silence that morning. You wordlessly passed the sugar or the milk or the syrup back and forth, him reading the headlines and you trying to figure out the crossword.
“Hey,” Bucky nudged you gently, the contact shaking you out of the puzzling trance you’d been in, your empty bowl long forgotten in front of you. “Maybe I’m wrong, but I seem to remember at least one of us works for a living.”
You hummed gently, setting your pencil down. “You know, I think you’re right.”
“I’ll wash up.” Bucky said, gathering the bowls.
You smiled in thanks, slipping back out of your seat and taking a moment to stretch before padding over to the living room.
You chose a Billie Holiday record, dropping the needle and settling at your desk to open up the latest chapter in Daisy’s adventure.
You’d already managed a few sentences when the water at the kitchen sink shut off and you heard Bucky following you into the living room.
Wordlessly, you grabbed the copy of your third book from its place on the shelf, holding it out for him. He’d started reading Daisy a few days earlier, a bit shy about picking them up at first, as if reading them would be like reading your diary. But you’d just smiled and handed him the first one, saying only: “If you hate it, just don’t say anything, okay?”
But he seemed to like it, asking you questions about the case here and there, and gloating when at the end his prediction for the killer proved correct. You weren’t sure why, but the fact that he liked it made your chest grow warm, filling with more pride than you usually felt when someone complimented your work.
Bucky took this third one, A Dangerous Place, his fingers brushing yours. “Thanks, doll.”
“Sure thing, Buck,” You returned, sending him a smile before turning back to your writing.
The two of you wrote and read until the needle slipped off the edge of the record, the end of the song static cutting out. You paused at the end of your last paragraph, blinking the screen bleariness from your eyes.
Standing up to stretch again, you wandered over to the window on the far side of the living room, hugging your arms to your chest as you watched the rain falling outside. After a few long moments, you turned back and walked over to the record player.
You could feel Bucky watching you over the top edge of the book, but you pretended not to notice, selecting your grandmother’s favorite “golden oldies” record. The upbeat opening of “December, 1963 (Oh What a Night)” began to play, and you closed your eyes with a smile.
You began by swaying a bit from side-to-side, but soon enough you were adding some steps and raising your arms and dancing in the middle of the living room.
“What are you doing?”
You opened your eyes to see Bucky shamelessly staring now, book left open in his lap.
“Dancing,” You said, continuing to do just that. “Too rainy for a walk today, and everyone needs a good dance party every once in a while.”
Feeling a small twinge of self-consciousness (but too much pride to stop), you turn around and keep dancing despite Bucky’s gaze. Which, when you couldn’t stop yourself from turning back to see again, was still stuck on you.
“You’ve never danced along to my music over there?” You teased, nodding your head towards the wall between your two apartments.
Bucky fixed you another one of his unamused looks, but it only made your smile grow as you imagined him trying to shake his hips or shimmy over there in his bare-walled apartment.
He didn’t miss the change in your expression, crossing his arms and leaning back against the sofa as you continued to dance. “What’s so funny?”
“Nothing,” You swayed over to the window and back. “Just trying to picture you dancing.”
“I can dance.” Bucky scoffed, “I’m just...out of practice.”
“Well there’s one surefire way to fix that.”
You paused in your dance, extending your hand in his direction. Bucky stiffened, and regret immediately twisted in your stomach at the panic in his eyes. Too far.
You pulled your hand back, thankful for the end of the song as an excuse to pull the needle up off the record. Straightening up, you offered what you hoped was an easy, slightly teasing smile.
“But unfortunately my dance card is full today. Maybe next time, soldier.” You said. “Now how about some lunch?”
The tension had eased from Bucky’s shoulders, but you weren’t sure how to read the expression now written on his face. It looked almost...disappointed. But then his lips were quirking up in a little smirk.
“Lunch sounds great.”
A muffled cry woke you in the middle of the night.
You were out of bed and pulling on your dressing gown in less than a minute, padding to the front door and over to Bucky’s apartment.
You’d long since grown used to rising in the dark hours of the night, your sleep cycle lightening and adjusting as you learned to read the signs from next door. Sometimes, like tonight, he would let out a shout– part of a name or a word or just an expression of helplessness that made your chest constrict. Most of the time it’s quieter– the creak of the floorboards as he paces or the whisper of water running as he tries to wash the dream away with a cold shower.
Regardless of what tipped you off, you always arrived at his door shortly thereafter, raising your hand to knock gently.
You’ve learned that there are two sides to Bucky.
There’s Daytime Bucky, who comes over to your apartment every day with a snarky retort and flops on your couch with the ease of someone who owns the place. He’s the Bucky who makes you laugh and does the dishes for you.
And there’s Nighttime Bucky, who is quiet and haunted and looks like he’s halfway between here and some hell that you could never begin to imagine. He’s the Bucky who never comes to you, but always lets you in.
That night was no different.
After opening the door, he shuffled back to the couch and sank down, trusting that you would follow. You did, sitting down on the other end, careful to leave plenty of space between the two of you.
This one was worse than usual, you could tell.
He sat, hunched over, with his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands. It was weighing him down, the memories and the shame.
It was why he never came to you.
He was ashamed of himself. Guilty and remorseful. You wished you could convince him that he didn’t have to be. That he was a good man. He always had been.
But you didn’t want to push him. You didn’t want to say the wrong thing and bring up some even worse recollection. You didn’t want to ask him about it and make him relive it again. You didn’t want to hurt him.
“Buck?” You kept your voice soft, “I’m going to make us some tea, okay?”
He scrubbed his hands over his face, inhaling deep and shaky. Bucky managed to meet your eyes for an instant before his gaze flicked back to the floor, his jaw clenched tightly.
“Yeah,” His voice was a rasping whisper, “Okay.”
“Okay,” You echoed, sending him a small smile even though he wasn’t looking at you.
Bucky’s apartment was roughly the same layout as yours, but it looked so different. The walls were all the same off-white, turned blue by the light of his TV. The TV, the couch, and a coffee table in between were the only furniture to be seen in the main living area. No side tables or armchairs, no houseplants or interesting lamps. His kitchen was equally bare, holding just the essentials and nothing more. You’d never been inside the bedroom, but you imagined it didn’t have much more than a bed. Maybe a nightstand.
It was an apartment of a man who’d spent so long under the control of someone else he’d forgotten who he was.
But, as you opened the cabinet above the sink, a small smile tugged at your lips to see a box of green tea next to a package of coffee filters. He’d forgotten who he was, but he was starting to rebuild that identity.
Over the time you’d spent together, the two of you had discovered he liked pie more than cake. He could eat barrels of pad thai and stacks of pizza, but he didn’t like tacos very much (too easy to crumble accidentally in his left hand). Most of the time he liked comedies more than dramas, and he wasn’t adverse to a good romance. He still liked ‘40s music, although you weren’t exactly providing a diverse array of options.
And he liked your books.
“You sure you shouldn’t be a detective or something?” He’d said when he finished the most recent in Daisy’s adventures.
As you turned in your desk chair to face him, warmth fluttered in your stomach. “It’s pretty easy to solve the crime when you’ve made the whole thing up.”
“I mean it, doll.” Bucky shook his head. “You never thought about becoming a Daisy Martin yourself?”
“That’s not...I can’t do that stuff.”
“Sure you can.” Bucky pressed. “You write it like you know it.”
“Good instinct I guess.” You shrugged. “But I could never be like Daisy.”
The easy smirk slipped from Bucky’s face at that. “What do you mean?”
“I mean I’m not– Daisy...she’s all daring and wit and charm.”
Bucky leaned forward a bit, his answer so simple and honest you couldn’t help but believe him.
“I think you’re all that and more.”
And then the smirk tugged at his lips once more as he leaned back against the couch, stretching both arms across the top.
“Gotta be daring to sass the Winter Soldier like you do.”
You rolled your eyes at that, though your heart was still racing from his earnest compliment.
“Just as well you decided to be a writer,” Bucky continued, cocking his head to the side. “If you hadn’t, I wouldn’t have my favorite book.”
Plenty of people had told you Daisy was their favorite character, that it was their favorite series, or that you were their favorite writer. The compliment always made you feel good, always filled your chest with warmth.
But coming from Bucky?
It made you feel like flying.
The hiss of steam and soft gurgle of the water coming to a boil brought you back to the present. You poured a cup for you and a cup for Bucky, stirring in a bit of honey once it had steeped and carrying them carefully back to the living room.
He looked better than when you left him, his eyes more clear as he met your gaze and managed to hold it for a moment.
“Here,” Your smile as soft as your voice, you handed him the mug, “Careful though, it’s still hot.”
“Thanks,” He murmured, cradling the cup between his metal hand and his flesh one.
You nodded, mirroring him and letting the warmth seep into your hands. You lifted the mug to your lips but didn’t take a drink, blowing gently across the top of the liquid to cool it down before taking a small sip.
The two of you sat there for a while in silence, you content to drink your tea and simply provide Bucky some quiet company. Your mug was nearly empty by the time he spoke.
“It was a mission,” He began, his tone measured and his words careful. “Somewhere cold. I think it was Poland.”
You slowly lowered the mug, setting it quietly on the table and giving him your full attention. He wasn’t looking at you, his gaze cast down to his hands, the black and gold vibranium of his left hand curling into a fist before releasing and repeating the gesture.
You didn’t say anything. You just waited for him to continue if he wanted to. And he did.
“The ambassador was leaving his hotel to fly home and my mission was to intercept the car on the way. I sniped one of the tires from the woods and the car crashed into a tree on the side of the road. I punched through the window and shot the ambassador, but the driver was still alive. He was hurt and trapped by the hood hitting the tree. He was...he begged me to let him go. He didn’t know anything and he wouldn’t say anything. He had a family, a wife and two daughters.”
Bucky clenched both fists, his voice getting scratchy.
“I shot him, too. That’s...that’s when I woke up.”
You reached forward and took his hands in yours. Bucky’s gaze rose sharply from where your hands covered his, surprise in his eyes. He looked so vulnerable, the blue of his irises shining, uncertainty written all over his face as he waited to see your reaction.
You knew he expected you to be repulsed. To hate him. To fear him.
But you didn’t. The Winter Soldier would always be a part of him, a ghost from his past he could never fully escape, but it wasn’t him. That wasn’t the man sitting in front of you. That wasn’t the man who cleaned your kitchen and made you smile and teased you until your face felt like it was on fire. You could never hate Bucky.
Lifting your left hand from his right, but keeping your right on the cool metal of his left hand, you touched his cheek. You ignored the flutter in your stomach at the sound of his breath hitching as your fingers trailed lighty over his cheekbone. Bucky remained still, eyes locked onto you, as your hand slid down to the side of his neck and then his shoulder, your fingers bumping gently over the silver links of his dog tags, hidden under the black tee shirt he wore.
As your hand reached his shoulder, you lifted his left hand in yours and gently wound it around your waist. His right arm did the same as you put your other hand on his left shoulder. Slowly, so he knew he could back away at any time, you pulled him closer.
Something snapped within him then, and he let his head drop onto your shoulder, his arms tightening and dragging you against him all at once. Your chest tightened at the shaking exhale leaving goosebumps on your neck. Hooking one arm over his shoulder while the other held the back of his head, you scratched dully at his scalp. The gesture made him relax even further, sagging against you.
Unable to hold up the weight of him, you gently leaned the two of you backwards until you were resting lengthwise on the sofa.
“It’s okay, Bucky,” You breathed, and his nose pressed into the juncture of your throat. “I’ve got you.”
He let out another shuddering exhale, his fingers flexing against the softness of your waist. You held him tight, closing your eyes and pouring everything you could into the embrace, planning to stay as long as he needed you.
You weren’t sure who fell asleep first, whether you followed Bucky or he followed you into the embrace of sleep.
But by morning it hardly mattered. The two of you had shifted overnight, adjusting unconsciously until you were pressed between Bucky and the back of the couch, his body still mostly on top of you and his arms wrapped securely around your middle. You’d slid down somewhat, his nose settled in your hair and your face tucked against his shoulder.
That was what woke you.
You’d moved your head sleepily, instinctively trying to nudge closer to the warmth of him, shifting your face into a beam of sunlight from the window beyond the couch. The brightness startled you gently into consciousness.
Sleep still clouding your thoughts, you stretched a little bit, pointing your toes and sighing as you let your head rest against the cool metal of Bucky’s bicep. He shifted too, inhaling deeply and tightening his hold around your waist.
And then he froze.
You lifted your head again, finding his blue eyes wide as they met yours. The lines around his eyes were tight with trepidation.
Lifting your hand, you gently brushed them with your fingers, wondering sleepily if that might smooth his worries away.
“You okay?” You asked, your tongue still heavy with sleep. “Another nightmare?”
Bucky relaxed, his breath puffing gently against your skin. And then, making your chest tighten, a small smile lifted the side of his mouth.
“No, doll, no nightmares.”
“And you’re feeling okay?” You checked, moving your hand up to card gently through his dark hair.
His eyes fluttered closed, and you were suddenly jealous of his long lashes, getting to kiss his cheek so sweetly. You were barely managing to fight the impulse when he pressed his face into your neck, the subtle scratch of his stubble sending tingles down your spine.
You wrapped your arms around his back, holding him tight and wondering if he could hear the way your heartbeat picked up speed.
A minute later, though, he definitely heard your stomach rumble.
Bucky chuckled, lifting his head with one of his smug smiles. “And you’re hungry.”
“Maybe,” You said, cheeks heating up with embarrassment.
Bucky just laughed some more, the low sound vibrating through your whole body. He untangled himself from you, leaving you suddenly cold as he stood. But before you could embarrass yourself any more by asking him to come back, he was holding out his hand.
“C’mon, sweetheart,” He nodded his head towards the wall between your apartment and his, “I’m gonna make you breakfast.”
“Well,” You said, slipping your hand into his and letting him pull you to your feet. “I won’t say no to that.”
Bucky insisted you relax for the morning while he cooked, shooting you a death glare if you so much as looked like you were going to get up from your place at the counter. Even for a cup of tea. He insisted on fixing that for you too (and he made it to perfection, observant bastard).
He had you set up with the crossword and a pencil, too, but you were much more content to watch him work. He looked comfortable in your kitchen, mixing and pouring and flipping pancakes with easy expertise. He looked like he belonged.
And, though you were a little daunted by the implications of this realization, you knew that he did belong.
You didn’t mind at all. Especially not when he made the best pancakes you’d ever had.
“You’ve been holding out on me, Barnes,” You teased as you put another pancake onto your plate, “Here I’ve been cooking for you and you’ve been a gourmet chef this whole time!”
Bucky shook his head, finishing a big bite from his own stack, “Hardly gourmet if the menu only has pancakes and eggs.”
“Hey now,” You nudged him with your elbow, “Don’t sell yourself short. I love your famous call to the chinese place down the street.”
Bucky rolled his eyes.
“Seriously though,” You sobered up, putting your hand on his and drawing his eyes to yours, “Thank you. It’s not often I have somebody make me breakfast like this.”
Bucky huffed, spearing his next bite with a little more force, grumbling, “I can fix that.”
You spent the rest of the day in your usual routine, Bucky reading (something written by someone else now that he’s caught up on Daisy’s adventures) while you worked.
Lately, you’d made remarkably good progress on the next book. Whenever you sat down at the computer, the words just flowed and chapter after chapter made their way onto the page. If your luck kept up, you might have a first draft done in a month or two.
You were about three quarters through a chapter, working out some dialogue between Daisy and the police detective she usually collaborated with, when a noise from the hallway outside startled you.
“Bucky!” A voice called, knocking on the door– although you realized it sounded so quiet because they were knocking next door. “Buck-ay! Buck-nasty!”
You stood from your desk, turning and meeting Bucky’s gaze. His brows were raised in surprise and a bit of suspicion, although they settled quickly into realization as the voice continued.
“C’mon man, I know you’re there.” The voice continued, sounding concerned despite the teasing nature of its words, “Your cyborg ass doesn’t leave that couch.”
Bucky stood and stalked to your door, a long-suffering look on his face. You trailed behind, equally confused and intrigued. Bucky opened your door and stepped out into the hallway while you stopped in the doorway, peering out.
“What do you know about my ass anyway, birdbrain?”
You would have laughed at Bucky’s greeting had you not been distracted by the man in front of him.
He was dressed casually, donning jeans and a green jacket over a simple tee shirt, but he was unmistakable. It was Sam Wilson.
Captain America was standing on your doorstep.
@kotaevln @overtly-cuteashell @a-beautiful-rose @seafrost-fangirl @dracoxxyoflam @thesneakylittleminx @sociallyantisocialbutterfly @amaroho @just-dreaming-marvel-2
Forever: @crossbowking @theunofficialduke @honeylemonwithrose @dark-night-sky-99 @adikaofmandalore @tomorrowsanotherday @hopplessdreamer @rachelxwayne @all-will-be-well-love @mad-girl-without-a-box @sonia1324
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Hey guys! I’m sorry there hasn’t been a new one shot yet. Some uni stuff came up, that required more work than I had thought so I haven’t had time to sit down and write this week. I finally got everything done so hopefully, I can start on that Steve request tonight.
To everyone who has sent me requests: I saw them all and I’m really excited to write them. It’s just gonna take a little longer so please don’t think I have forgotten you!
In the meantime, go check out my latest one shot here: another new york summer night
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Fandom: The Avengers/MCU
Relationship: Bucky Barnes/ Fem!Reader
Summary: When you decide to stop taking hormonal birth control pills, Bucky is supportive. He loves you, but there is an....adjustment period.
Note: Reader has a uterus in this one. We are dealing with periods and the side effects of getting off of birth control. I will be honest, this is self indulgent. I am going through it right now. Please don’t read this is that will upset you! I have plenty of other fics!
“I think I’m gonna get off birth control.” you told Bucky over dinner.
Bucky immediately started to choke on his lo mein. After a few minutes and several sips of water, he was able to speak again. He was blushing and stuttering, but at least he wasn’t choking anymore. Progress.
“Isn’t it a little soon? I mean my job is kind of a mess, and I know this isn’t the 40’s but shouldn’t we be at least kinda thinking about getting married first?”
“Honey, no.” you giggled, “I’m not talking about having kids.”
“You want to get off birth control, but you don’t want a baby?” Bucky paused before sighing, “Make it make sense, doll.”
“Birth control has other purposes besides that. I got on it when I was a kid because of how bad my periods were.” you explained.
“So, why get off it?” he asked with no judgement in his eyes, only curiosity. You know that you wouldn’t have been able to talk about this openly with some past partners, and you really appreciated that you could with Bucky.
“I’ve been on it most of my life.” you shrugged, “Also I figured that if birth control is covering up some health issue I should probably get it figured out sooner rather than later. What do you think?”
“You know you don’t need to ask my permission.” he took your hand and squeezed it, “It’s your body and I’ll support whatever.”
“I know, I just… I’ve read that getting off of birth control can make your hormones...wacky?” you cringed at the word but you couldn’t think of a better one, “I just want to make sure you’re prepared.”
Bucky shot you an incredulous look, “Doll, you didn’t bat an eyelash when I told you I was a 100 year old ex-assassin super soldier. You think I’m going to run scared because of some hormones? Talk about ye of little faith.”
You chuckled, “I’m sorry.”
“Besides,” he ran his thumb along the back of your hand, “How bad can it be?”
After a few days off the pill, your first unmedicated period started and it damn near broke Bucky’s heart. You spent the better part of the week curled around a heating pad and taking over the counter pain medication. You didn’t leave your bed more than was absolutely necessary. You were also a little bit clingier. Not that Bucky minded.
“Hey baby?” Bucky called into your apartment, “I got the stuff you wanted. But I read that sugar and caffeine can make your cramps worse. You sure you want it?”
“I’m dying, Bucky. I’m dying and all you care about are facts?” The reply came from the mountain of blankets on the couch. Bucky was just happy to see that you moved out of your bed since he saw you last.
He chuckled as he handed you the shopping bag full of goodies, “How insensitive of me.”
You took the bag greedily and started tearing into the snacks, “You are forgiven. For now.”
It wasn’t great and Bucky hated seeing you in so much pain, but you had him preparing for another world war. When you mentioned hormones he thought it would be way worse. A week of you being a little needy and clingy wasn’t that bad. Also, he kind of liked taking care of you.
Maybe he should do some more research on the side effects of getting off birth control.
Sam raised an eyebrow as Bucky picked up another box of condoms. Then another.
“Everything okay between you and Y/N?” Sam asked.
“Yeah, Y/N got off birth control a few weeks ago, but we’re still being safe. Gotta stock up.” Bucky shrugged and grabbed a fourth box.
“Okay…” Sam trailed off, “You know those things expire, right?”
Bucky nodded and did a quick calculation, “This should last about a week.”
“Gross.” Sam visibly shuddered, “I regret asking.”
“You think I can bulk order these?” Bucky asked, debating on grabbing a fifth box to be safe.
“Stop it!” Sam turned and left Bucky alone in the aisle.
With a shrug, Bucky grabbed the fifth box and followed his friend to go check out.
Sam refused to make eye contact with Bucky as they said their goodbyes and Bucky made his way home.
When Bucky stepped into the apartment and didn’t see you he was concerned. His protective instincts kicked in as he began to search the rooms. When he entered your bedroom, he found a much better sight.
You were standing naked in front of your mirror, appreciating your own reflection. Bucky licked his lips as you ran your hands over your own curves. You caught his eye in the mirror and smirked.
“I’m fucking hot.” you said it as if you never noticed it before. Maybe you hadn’t. Shame.
Bucky chuckled and took off his own shirt, “Yeah, you are.”
“You,” you spun on your heels and pointed to him, “Are lucky to have me.”
Bucky’s eyes darkened as he took you in, “Yeah I am.”
When Bucky first read about what birth control can do to a person’s sex drive, he had been concerned that all the times you slept together you hadn’t been into it. That you only did it because you thought he wanted to. But he quickly learned that wasn’t the case. He learned that for you, a suppressed sex drive was about on par for the normal person. Now with this sudden boost to your libido, you were almost insatiable.
You crooked your finger at him with a flirtatious wink and he went willingly, always happy to oblige you. What good was being a super soldier if he didn’t put that superhuman stamina to good use every now and then?
Come to think of it, maybe he should have grabbed a sixth box. Oh well.
“I’m a mess.” you sniffled as you looked into the mirror.
After years of having a good complexion with minimal effort, you were suddenly breaking out. Another hormonal side effect Bucky read about. You always talked about how looks don’t define a person and that blemishes shouldn’t matter. However, that was probably easier to believe when you never had an issue with acne in your life.
“You’re a cute mess?” Bucky tried, but you only continued to cry. Bucky shrunk away, hating how badly he was fucking this up. He wanted to be comforting, but he was utterly lost. Completely useless.
“How can you stand to look at me?” you turned away from the mirror. You avoided Bucky’s eyes and tried to hide your face in the sleeve of your shirt. That was it. Bucky would not stand there as you talked down about yourself.
“Hey now,” Bucky took your arm away from your face, “I love you. I don’t care about a few zits. Hell doll, your skin could peel off to reveal scales and I would still think you were the cutest thing around.”
You shook your head with a groan, “You are not helping!”
Despite your words, Bucky could see your watery smile. He took your chin between his fingers, and looked down at your face. He placed a quick kiss on your lips.
“You could be my own Smaug.” he teased.
You giggled and Bucky couldn’t help but grin. Maybe he wasn’t so useless when it came to cheering you up.
“Wait. Did you just call me a dragon?!” your eyebrows furrowed before you smacked his shoulder, “Asshole!”
Bucky sighed as you stormed out of the bathroom. Okay, he was back to being useless. He cursed quietly before making a game plan.
“Honey, I’m sorry.” he called as he followed you down the hallway, “I’ll buy you some of that candy you like?”
“Why? So I can add it to my snack horde? You know, like a dragon!?”
“Dammit, Y/N! You know that’s not what I meant!”
“Carrie Underwood and Miranda Lambert were right about men!”
“Baby, what does that even mean?”
Bucky’s favorite change since you got off birth control had to be the changes to your mental state. You said it was like coming alive after years of being groggy and thinking that was normal. Bucky knew you suffered from depressive episodes, but he never knew just how bad your baseline was.
Where you were reserved and quiet before, you were now loud and full of life. You started to sing and dance around the house more often and Bucky had no choice but to fall in love with you all over again. You asked him a few times if he thought you had been dosed with a party drug. You were like a completely different person.
Bucky held you in his arms, content to listen to your calming heartbeat against his. He opened his eyes to see you already looking up at him.
“See something you like?” he teased with a sleepy grin.
“You are so beautiful.” you responded earnestly.
Bucky felt the warm flush on his cheeks as he looked away from you. Away from your words.
“Funny, doll.” he cleared his throat, still avoiding you.
You reached up and grabbed his cheeks in your hands, making him look down at you.
“I mean it.” you looked into his eyes, “I don’t know if I’ve ever noticed how blue your eyes are. They are breathtaking. Everything has been grey for so long, I am so glad I can finally appreciate it all.”
Bucky held you a little closer as he frowned. He tried not to beat himself up too badly for not noticing your depression before, but it was really hard for him.
Bucky smiled sadly at you, rubbing his hand down your back, “I wish I knew how bad it was for you.”
“I didn’t even know.” you shrugged before snuggling back into his bare chest.
He kissed the top of your head. When words failed him, Bucky found that physical touch did more than suffice. Given the way you sighed against him as his lips pressed against your hair, he knew you felt the same.
“Thank you.” you whispered.
“What for, doll?” he lowered his voice to match yours.
“For being here. For being so understanding.” you kissed his chest absently, “Not everyone would stick around for this.”
“How many times do I have to tell you, honey?” he squeezed you closer again, “I’m not everybody.”
Eventually you fell asleep in his arms and Bucky couldn’t help but feel grateful for you. For the time he got to spend with you. He loved every moment. From the times you were screaming at him for an offense he didn’t understand, to the times when you clutched him so tightly because you couldn’t get enough of his touch. He would treasure them all.
Your phone pinged on the bedside table and Bucky checked the notification with his free hand.
Period Tracker: Your period should start tomorrow!
Bucky closed his eyes and groaned.
Of course, there were times he would treasure slightly less than others.
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