Fragrance de Lavender
Love me some elegance
Makes me feel tender.
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NaPoWriMo 9. I Am Far From You
In a room filled with twenty-four others
You stand out as one of my favorite
No matter how far I am, nor flowers of many colors
It is never hard to ubiquitously admit
Just how bright you are
A stretch may be so, so far
Fair to say just how much you
A universally loved and featured star
Without you there would be no truth, no true
I cannot be blue in your absence, yet sadness stirs
Neither of us may come first,
But we can take the lead
If I am your vocal outburst
Then speak again so that I may be freed
Once more with your lips
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RIP to all the moments where I was so scared of falling down the stairs that I didn't even dare to open the door
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“never let lack of applause fool you into thinking that what you’re doing isn’t important. never let absence of celebration fool you into thinking that you’re not worthy of occupying spaces with love. external validation is easy to get, learn to honor you and your flowers first.”
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i keep your name hidden under my tongue like cyanide. it tastes like your homemade honey lip balm that you proudly showed me, pulling me into your lap as you cheekily asked if i wanted to taste it.
i bite into your name and feel my eyes flutter shut as its poison rots my memories. it tastes bitter like the words i never said to you and the burning stove you left on and smoke-filled rooms.
i keep your name hidden just in case you come and try to take it away too.
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#OLD POEM DUMP NO°1
The wrapping paper around my words
Gaining more and more importance
The more I wrap around.
The fictions that arrive in my head
Before I talk seem so
Replacing the longing
For affection and pure individuality.
Casual conversations filled with casual lies.
There is no end to something when there’s no beginning.
Lost for words,
I can’t remember.
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NaPoWriMo 8. Flock Thoughts
God was amorphous, ambivalent, and bright. A powerful light in the sky, somewhere in the clouds, and the blue filled with wonder. A juvenile, and adolescent level of blunder. While I sat in the sermon and prayer. Learning Mary, and Joseph, what’s fair. With the saints marching in, and original sin. The guilt that hangs off you like fog. Trapped in and floundering bogs. In the wet warm embrace, or Our Lord's holy embrace. In the cage of my chest, I kept trying my best, to keep the flame of my passions alive. Yet in these harrowed halls, in their judgement standing tall, felt the condemnation inside of me strive. To consume me within. No absolution could wipe, these feelings aside, no forgiveness is sought to forgive. If we’re born without sin for the Son has been killed, why then must the babe still be washed. Forgo all of my dreams they are squashed. When I look at the sky, in its infinite hue; I still picture some cosmic control. Not at the wheel, but like a spark in the mind. Firing synapses out to let go. Watch the world beyond time, beyond reasons we find. Amorphous, uncaring, unkind. Am I really so better than all this creation, this land of vacation, and wonderful place to be stationed. Full of life and of color and love. For the things that I see and I don’t. Like the vaporous picture I held, like a child with a dandelion in hand.
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you are a gift and you are a grace. you are a shining break from this greyscale world. you bring your own unique touch of life into dead spaces, like a light touching a lake at night, shimmering and radiating outwards and mimicking the sun. you see things in beautiful ways, visions that could be turned into masterpiece paintings, and you think in lace patterns that would take hours of joy to analyze, each thread intertwined with your nerves and your feelings and your wholy human desires. your body has sprung from ecology and survived and carried you dutifully through this lovely, vicious world, and your hands sculpt things that put the pleasant fluttering of butterflies in peoples' stomachs. you are made of many pieces that make you whole; you are, in all sum and all reality, a human being.
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Today's story was brought to you by Jennifer! Darling, this was a loot of fun, and I can't wait to see whaere this series goes int he future!
Prompt: a character prompt for Capability Seen.
“I called in some help,” Shieldwall told Natalie. He had officially been her bodyguard for three days now, prevented two more attempts to nab her, and still hadn’t asked what she and Mister Gold had talked about behind closed doors. “Talked to your boss. Told him I wanted a woman on your detail in case you need or want to go somewhere that guys aren’t welcome.”
“I’m not letting a bodyguard watch me pee,” Natalie said, since there were things she would put up with to not get kidnapped again, and there were things she wouldn’t. “But I guess at least one more person making sure I don’t’ get nabbed would be nice. Who do you have in mind?”
“Another of the ‘left to die’ crowd in the Powered community,” he replied, apparently involved in working on some of his gear. He spent a truly impressive amount of time fiddling with his little buts of tech, but Natalie had seen him in a fight, now, and she knew just how useful and important all of it was. His Power, as his name implied, was to create walls of force whenever he wanted. Not, Natalie supposed, that they were always walls. He seemed to be able to make them appear in whatever shape or configuration he wanted, including as shield bubbles around himself, or around her. “Phoenix is a little crazy, but she’s good people.”
“Ringing endorsement. Crazy?”
“Thinks she’s actually a phoenix and that when she dies, she’ll be reborn from the ashes.”
“Is she right?”
“No idea. As far as I know, she’s never tried it.”
Well, that might be a problem later, but Natalie wasn’t going to worry about it right now. Not when there was a crazy villain who, Mister Gold suspected, knew about her Power.
Her Power. The probable cause of all the drama. Damn it all, Natalie didn’t want to have a Power. Powers were always trouble. She wanted to be a nobody, thank you very much.
But no. Her father had been a Somebody. One of the most powerful heroes on record, apparently. He had been able to duplicate other Powers after seeing them a single time. He died stopping a massive villain attack that would have killed millions. Natalie wasn’t sure how she felt about it. About the man who she could barely even remember, who had given her more than just a stubborn chin and a pair of blue eyes.
And now Natalie had a Power. His legacy carried in her genetics, so well hidden that no one but Mister Gold ever knew it was there. A Power that the entire Powered community would kill to possess.
She enhanced other Powers.
It wasn’t the flashy sort of Power. It wasn’t a save-or-doom the world sort of power wither, or even one she could consciously do anything with. It was just there, in the background, doing its thing on any Power who got close enough for long enough.
“So when does your friend get here?” Natalie asked, since talking about her Power seemed like a no-go. She liked Shieldwall, but so far, he hadn’t offered his real name, and she hadn’t asked for it. He was a great boyfriend so far, but she just became the Powered community’s new Most Valuable Player, and that wasn’t a secret she was ready to share. “Seems like a big step, meeting your friends.”
“Perhaps soon, I’ll meet some of yours,” he said with a wink. “Nix is on her way. Should be here any minute.”
“If that’s not an entrance line, I don’t know what is.”
Natalie looked up in time to see a slight woman step through the door. Like Shieldwall, she was dressed in dark tactical clothing. The normal kind, not the kind that Powers usually favored. She wasn’t armed, however, which told Natalie that she was a Power herself. Her hair was short and flaming red, and burn scars crept up her neck and across one cheek.
“Natalie, this is Phoenix Flame,” Shieldwall introduced the new arrival and stood to clasp hands with the woman. “Nix, this is Natalie, my girlfriend and the person I called you about. Frost Orchid is after her. I could use some help keeping her safe, and I’d be happier if it was a woman.”
Phoenix was quiet and gave Natalie a slow, measured look. There was a little hint of something crazy in her eyes, but Natalie had never been bothered by a little crazy. Shieldwall trusted this woman. Trusted her enough to call her, even given his granddaddy of all trust issues. That told Natalie what kind of person Phoenix was.
“You seem cool. We can hang,” she said brightly and proffered a hand to shake. Phoenix blinked once, apparently bemused, but shook her hand and nodded to herself. Natalie noticed that the same burn scars on Phoenix’s neck were echoed on her hands, and that her hands were callused from whatever training she did. She was also just a little too hot for a normal human, which probably meant she was a pyro of some flavor. Made sense, what with the name. “I’m Natalie. Mild-mannered secretary and apparently new hot topic for the Baddies Convention.”
“Just the one, we hope,” Shieldwall laughed, used to her irreverence by now, and just amused at her antics. Phoenix chuckled, but she sat when Natalie waved at a couch across from her. “So, what do you think. You in?”
“Guess you could probably talk me around. I want my usual fee, plus extras if we hit combat with more than two other Powers at the same time,” Phoenix said with a half-grin. She let flames play over her hands, confirming Natalie’s guess about her Power. “So, Frost Orchid. I owe her some pain. What’s got her panties in a bunch, and how can I make it worse?”
Twenty Questions (Subscriber Only!)
Not a Drill
Chase Music (Subscriber Only!)
Hide Out Freak Out (Subscriber Only!)
Call Home (Subscriber Only!)
Office Revelations (Subscriber Only!) (NEW!)
Introducing Flame (NEW!)
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Reaching for Home
Little miss me in a little, old tree
They need nothing but kindness, care, and love
Caught in rough bark, bearing a bright spark
Outside peppered in kisses courtesy of a pecking dove
Hear, 'Hold onto your innocence, little miss me!'
See, 'You should be just like little miss Justine!'
Let you find nothing worth keeping in the soft commands lathered in seethe
Keep climbing for kindness, not for those under your feet
Just for you- little miss me
I pray you never hop out of your tree
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have you ever felt love?
the disgusting one or
the one tickling above
and down your own guts?
butterflies as they say
the intense feeling of them
as if they were physically there
fire chills down your membranes
only to awake at the smell
of their infringing trace
have you ever felt so?
like you can hear their thoughts
colliding with yours,
a crushing gravity on self-destruct
fuck, this supernova..
is gonna vanquish it all..!
..have you ever? you don’t?
neither do i, you know
must be terrifying, the thought..
of being known by your own soul.
friday nights on highways
flashing lights go on by,
a symphony of luminance overwhelming the senses.
Every light pole a new infinity, and
Beyond the lightyears, I counted you to be there;
But stars are only stars twinkling in a dying sky-
promises made of things we can’t touch.
That’s what we made to each other,
with the waning moon a frail blanket.
Laying close, saying things that shouldn’t have been thought-
and aloud we declared it all.
Each word giving speed to a faulty shooting star,
letting any wish wished die upon it.
Maybe it was foolish to think you meant those things,
to let myself make moldavite rings.
The sky is still falling, each flashing light full of laughter over our decay.
Laughter masking its sorrow, grappling supernovas with grief stricken hands.
The dust of her burdens slip into tired eyes, letting tears flow freely down her cheeks.
She decides then it’s time to count the lights.
~ Alyssa Q
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I grew from a clump of tissue in womb, to a person that can live in this cruel world;
I grew from being a nagging baby, to a person that has enough strength to speak up with independence;
I grew from being a listener to others' opinions- too young to have my own, to a person with their own thoughts and intelligence;
I grew from being carried everywhere, to having enough balance to walking my own path;
I grew from having my eyes covered during a kissing scene, to having the choice to see the world with all the beauty and the ash;
I grew from being scared from loud noise, to craving it so I can quiet down my demons;
I grew from crying when I trip, to getting back up and burning life's eyes with lemons;
I grew from struggling to put letters together in order to form a word, into reading stories of thousand lifetimes formed with millions of words;
I grew from having my imaginary friends the only thing occupying my mind, to thinking about hundreds of possible worlds;
we all did;
We also grew from the one fear of being dropped, into having uncountable other terrors;
We grew loving ourselves hopelessly, into searching within ourselves for another hundred errors;
We grew from being our cheeky selves, into having red eyes and messed up brains;
We grew up from worrying about convincing our parents to go to the carnival tomorrow, into worrying about things we won't experience until we use canes;
Yet, I can't say I regret growing up;
I'll enjoy thinking for me;
I'll enjoy crying with my friends;
Making the best memories in the process;
I'll enjoy being able whenever I want- to flee;
I'll enjoy having my curfew as the cheers die down;
I'll enjoy doing whatever I want, even if it means moving to a new town;
I'll enjoy living every part of my life
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My undying and stubborn wish now is to wreathe your name in the words I write. To paint your portrait with the verses I compose. But look at the tragedy of this sullen universe, that my heart is yet to make an acquaintance with yours.
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What are floodgates without a flood?
My heart is as hollow as the tunnel
I am aimlessly walking through.
What are pages without ink?
A tiresome static-filled mind
racing with noise and incoherence.
What is a laugh without pleasure?
Empty eyes stare back at me at every bend
for mirrors are nothing but a consistent sad painting.
What am I without a soul?
For warmth is unfathomable
when the coolness of yesterday bites me to the bone.
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"I am not afraid of the storm!" - James McInerney. Poet & Author of ‘Bloom’, ‘In between the lines’, ‘Red’, ‘The Pieces that Collide’ & ‘Everything I Write is About You’ OUT NOW on Amazon/Kindle.
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