I stayed way longer than I was supposed to. I take responsibility for it. On my defense, my soul was tied to yours. I deposited all my dreams in you. For loving you I was willing to fight alone against the world.
You found me when I was hurting and you fixed me only to leave me in pieces again. I have forgiven you but I cant seem to forget the pain.
Remember that big snowstorm we had in February? I was frozen shoveling the snow outside while you was cleaning her driveway. I am capable of handling life by myself but that doesnt take away the fact that it hurts to be this lonely while you claim to love me.
I must have heard you say a thoudand times how well you are doing financially and Im happy for you but I wish you knew at times I struggled so hard to barely survive... Where was your love? Where was your love when you moved on with your life like I had died?
On Sundays you pump her gas while I pump my own. I woke up in an emergency room covered in tubes, tears running down my face I stared at the empty chair beside me. Where was your love?
I cried my soul out in my car on my birthday, a birthday you forgot two years in a row. I cried my soul on my Dad's death anniversary because I didn't have a shoulder to lean on. Yes I am strong but it doesnt mean it doesnt hurt to be alone.
Forgive me if now when you tell me how much you love me all I hear is empty words. Words can be beautiful, they are what I live for but when it comes to love, words need to match your actions.
Dont tell me you love me when you forgot about me. Dont tell me you love me when it was easy to let me go. Dont tell me you love me if you lay down every night next to someone else while I cant even imagine being close to someone ever again. Love must be a foreign concept for you.
You will look for me in every woman that you encounter for I not only touched your flesh, my love touched your soul everytime I made love to you.
Dont act like I didnt fight for you.. for us.. I did and for a very long time so forgive me now if Im exhausted.
Its certain I will love you until my last day with my last breath but my heart finally accepted I wasnt the one you wanted.
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an invitation to runaway
runaway with me?
i'd go across the world if it meant you'd go with me. hell, i would go to the closest place possible if thats what you want.
we can explore the rays of warm sunlight of the state where dreams come true.
my only dream is to be with you.
we can listen to stupid songs about running away from our place, songs about loving, and maybe we could sing our hearts out.
i could show you my city if you wanted, take you out to a lake, and count the stars in your eyes.
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