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#lots of love
cerleansky · 2 years
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The legacies people leave behind in you.
My handwriting is the same style as the teacher’s who I had when I was nine. I’m now twenty one and he’s been dead eight years but my i’s still curve the same way as his.
I watched the last season of a TV show recently but I started it with my friend in high school. We haven’t spoken in four years.
I make lentil soup through the recipe my gran gave me.
I curl my hair the way my best friend showed me.
I learned to love books because my father loved them first.
How terrifying, how excruciatingly painful to acknowledge this. That I am a jigsaw puzzle of everyone I have briefly known and loved. I carry them on with me even if I don’t know it. How beautiful.
~Edit~
Yikes guys I didn’t expect this post to blow up.
I’m grateful it did though. Looking at all the comments and tags really takes a stab at my heart because it just shows how wired we are for connection. If life has any meaning, then it’s that.
This concept really sunk its teeth into me as it reassures the notion that no one is ever truly gone. Parts of them just change into you.
That teacher I talked about inspired me to become a teacher myself. This was my first year teaching. Here’s to a new generation of curved i’s.
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pikavani · 3 months
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(If you request)
Would you draw sm-baby’s Carnival Jax?
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You know.. I really felt like drawing Jax a little.. unhinged~
I read your reply to my non-sentient Pomni and Caine fanart @sm-baby . I really really reaaaallly appreciate your excitement! Like.. me too Girl! No reason to get so worked up about lil ol' me :) I'm just like you!
I like other artists stuff and get happy when they like my work back ☺️
so.. get back on your throne and keep on rocking 🤟🏻⚡️
(Edit: I only accepted this request because I wanted to do it anyway)
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wis-art · 3 months
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I am transgender I have to love
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elysianrey · 1 year
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Now stay stay stay with me for now
Until our time is out
There's no one else for me but you...
a playlist curated by Lucy Carlyle that reminds her of Lockwood.
•true as true can get: kaiyko • never-ending summer: wes reeve • could you love me while i hate myself: zeph •stuck on us: claire rosinkranz, aidan bisset •repeat until death : novo amor • sweet nothing: taylor swift • oceans: seafret • stay alive: josé gonzález • you wouldn’t like me: sleeping at last • wildfire: seafret •hate to be lame: lizzie mcalpine, finneas • glitch: taylor swift • cognitive dissonance: sophie holohan • summer 2019: caroline culver • to build a home: the cinematic orchestra • sleep deprivation: chance peña• idk you yet: alexander 23 • reckless driving: lizzy mcalpine, ben kessler • agape: bear’s den • did i make you up?: half•alive • beach: axel flovent • renegade: big red machine, taylor swift • state of mind: sød ven • hot tea: half•alive
listen to the rest here
note: creating this playlist has been a dream of mine since I watched the series, and I am thankful that the wonderful, @genniearts was able to make this gorgeous piece to accompany it. I will continue to update the list as I find new music! I hope all of you authors, artists, and shippers enjoy. x
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themisterhip · 10 months
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The bunny selfie! 🐰 ✨
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artofalassa · 6 months
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The Bike
Part five of Wolfwood Lives AU! Sorry it took me so long, but have a familiar face and lots of hugs as an apology!
Part ONE | Part TWO | Part THREE | Part FOUR | Part SIX
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somerandomdudelmao · 9 months
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Hey, how do you feel about fic based on your comics? Asking for no particular reason at all no siree
OH I LOVE FICS BASED ON MY COMIC
I have a separate tag for them so I can find and reread them any time~
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iikisa · 5 months
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ladynoir!! i always felt the green didnt fit marinette’s costume and blue would be divine— but it builds plot LOL. 🤌
Misterbug: Are your eyes actually green?
Ladynoir: Hmm, I don’t know, are they? You wanna know?
Misterbug: Nevermind, haha..
And then they needa switch and ladynoir becomes ladybug for the day— her eyes are the prettiest shade of navy blue and adrien is just combusting quietly partially because of the cat miraculous’s side effects and his own thoughts of how pretty they are 😇
— LIKE I SAID, THE PLOT! FOR THIS SCENARIO! WOULD BE THE BEST! 👏
anywho enjoy the ladynoir fanart i cooked up ahah 🥸
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lessirussoss · 11 months
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georgia stanway as your girlfriend
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• physical touch. lingering touches when standing next to one another, pinky’s intertwined when around those who aren’t completely familiar with the two of you. you aren’t massive on pda but there’s always a hand on your hip or an arm wrapped around georgia’s bicep.
• MATCHING OUTFITS. but not the cringy ones that are like exactly the same but matching colours or coordinating ones and the same shoes. everyone loves it too, but georgia’s never the one choosing, you always choose the colours or the shoes and it’s known that it works like that too.
• always posting eachother, but like off guard pictures always of them when looking away or pictures of you two that teammates and friends took of you during a conversation or a quiet moment between the two of you.
• no one would ever pin georgia as a jealous person before she got with you. her jealousy wasn’t overly possessive but protective in the best way possible. her eyes were always on you, ready to confront anyone who’s eyes were wondering for too long.
• definitely a few tattoos of georgia’s that are dedicated to you, small moments capsulated in a doodle, nights in your city whenever she comes to visit, small trips with just you two and so many more memories are sprinkled over her torso.
• she LOVES when you do her hair, although most of the time her hair’s only in a ponytail or left hanging over her shoulders, she lives for the quiet moments between the two of you while laying in bed after a hectic day out.
• she knows you like the back of her hand, always knowing what to order you at a restaurant if your running a bit late and whenever friends or family ask what to get you for christmas or your birthday she always has the perfect answer.
• you are a main part of her game day rituals, if you play together you’ll do your hair the same while in the changing rooms, if you play separately or don’t play at all you’ll send her a message of encouragement that she’ll read before getting herself ready for the pre match rituals.
• for night outs you’ll get ready in your shared bathroom with music blaring and pre drinks already half empty. you’d always be the last one ready so as she’s waiting she’d stand behind you with arms around your waist admiring your unready state.
• CAFE DATES!! every time you go to a new town or city you have to have at least one date in a new cafe. you’ll always get a tea and georgia will forever be getting a hot chocolate, you always end up sharing a muffin of some sort (probably chocolate) because that’s what she always insists upon buying.
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mandywandy17 · 5 months
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HOLY GUACAMOLE 1OO likes and notes?!(plus more!)THANK YOU SM (⁠人⁠*⁠´⁠∀⁠`⁠)⁠。⁠*゚⁠+(⁠ ⁠˘⁠ ⁠³⁠˘⁠)⁠♥ this is the first time it's been this high omg u guys are so sweet :33
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TYSM AGAIN SO HERES A DRAWING FOR U GUYS I LUV YA SM<33
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YIIPPEEEEo⁠(⁠(⁠*⁠^⁠▽⁠^⁠*⁠)⁠)⁠o
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al1fers-haven · 1 month
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Alastor x reader where she is pregnant but they aren’t together?
Like she showed up at the hotel 2 months into her pregnancy and she told angel dust and Alastor but no one else really knows, and Alastor is really protective of her around people because she’s pregnant and the father isn’t around to help?
He’s just being a gentleman! His mother didn’t raise him to not help out a woman in need. So he does shit like get her late night cravings or sit there and listen to her cry because she didn’t get to take a nap bc of throwing up. Stuff like that!
Just a Drabble, I’ll probably ask someone to write this for me, for I don’t have a Chromebook till Monday..
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cookieswithay · 4 months
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The boys have gotten a gifts from Santa! (Totally not Orihime, btw)
☃️Merry Christmas!🎄
(Sorry, I'm late Ichihime squad. Got busy.)
(Tag list: @usoppsstar, @takibikaen, @elyonholic, @ichihimelover1503, @ichinoue, @o0o0thorn0o0o)
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mqverick · 4 months
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st. tropez party girl || ִ ࣪𖤐
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“if you hold me tight, it's alright
let the fire ignite.”
─── ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ ───
Jerry fucking Maguire. The man with the vision, the most known sports agent in the town, the guy who could set his mind into something and actually achieve it, even if it meant costing him the money for a once in a lifetime opportunity. Jerry Maguire, who was very openly a flirt, a cocky bastard, a pretentious loser and a little bit of a crazy person with unrealistic ambitions.
That’s who you had to work with and it both physically and mentally hurt you. You hated his guts, always had. You didn’t know a lot about him, just the basics and the ones written on the papers or spoken on the telly, but those few were enough for your mind to build up the rest of his personality, which you were not a big fan of.
God. You hated yourself for being so sentimental, but Jerry had just gotten fired and he looked sweaty and alone and miserable — not to mention how he’d literally fished out Flipper in front of everybody while completely losing every single remaining of his dignity through that ridiculous speech, at which everyone has been holding laughs back from, and you’d found yourself growing rather empathetic to his embarrassment, so you’d yelled out that you were going with him.
All eyes had been on you, strange looks, muffled snickers, even your friends at the office had warned you to sit your ass back where it had been for the past couple of years, with a secure future.
But no, you just had to save Jerry some of the embarrassment. You were currently in the elevator with him, awkward silence building up between the two of you as he fiddled around.
“Thought you hated me,” you heard him utter shyly. You glared at him, noticing the ungrateful choice of words after you’d just publicly humiliated yourself for him.
“Hate doesn’t exist in professionalism, Maguire. I’m strongly opposed against your idealism and quite frankly, not exactly fond of you either,” you replied sharply, not daring to look directly at him.
“Hm, so much for hate not existing.”
“But, I refuse to work for a bunch of fucking hippie hypocrites like Sugar. And you know, if it weren’t for me, no one would have had your back in there. Not even your precious assistant.”
Jerry gave you a weak, tight-lipped smile as he raised the bag with Flipper in it in the air. “From now on, the fish will symbolize a better future.”
You unintentionally chuckled, hurrying to put a straight face back on as you cleared your throat, wondering how the hell he managed to sound so drunk without having had the tiniest drop of alcohol in his body all day.
“You’re stupid,” you whispered under your breath, thankfully loud enough that it only reached your own ears.
“Thank you, you know,” Jerry turned to you, holding out his hand for you to take. “I honestly thought no one would believe in me.”
“Prove to me that you can be alone and then you’ll thank me, Jerry,” you spoke, moving past him and ignoring his hand as the doors opened.
That same evening, the moment you reached your home, you collapsed against the door, face buried in your hands as you mentally slapped and kicked yourself. What the fuck had you gone and done? Trusting Jerry fucking Maguire, Jerry Ma-fucking-uire, as Avery liked to call him. You were screwed, hopeless and at the mercy of the person you swore you wanted to erase from the universe.
But his mission statement had inspired you.
He spoke words that the others back at the office weren’t ready to hear, truths, facts, goals, dreams. That was the Jerry Maguire you quit your job for and maybe it wouldn’t be the messy waste of potential that your brain had pictured.
Except when you thought that things could actually possibly work out, Jerry found out that Cush and his family had signed a contract with Bob Sugar behind his back, and everything had returned back to the crap hole where it had began. With a single client hanging on by a thread, Jerry was wrecked and so were you.
Your life was destroyed, you’d decided.
Maybe acting out on those amateur pole dancing lessons that your older cousin had taught you back when you were 17 wouldn’t be such a bad idea. Jerry’s backup people were falling down like flies. Everyone was dropping him, first his own company, then Cush and eventually — which came as the biggest surprise — Avery.
You and Rod were his only hope.
For days now, you’d been rehearsing in front of your mirror how you’d tell him that you were dropping him as well. You were done, wouldn’t allow yourself to go bankrupt for a petty sad man.
It was either 9 o’clock or midnight, you couldn’t be arsed to check, because your favourite show was on TV and the commodity of your couch and blanket was comfortable enough to have you watching with your eyes half-lidded — when you heard a series of playful yet lazy knocks on your door. You groaned at the noise, not bothering to get into your slippers as you slid your sock-covered feet across the entrance, peeking through the door to see who was feeling rather silly in the middle of the night.
Of course it would be him. Who else?
For a second, you considered not opening the door for him. See if he’d stay there, in that pathetic posture of him, fingers running through his fucked up hair as he shivered just a little from being undressed in such a chilly weather. But then again, you’d already thrown your career away for him, so what gives?
“Hellooooo,” he said happily as you let him inside, grinning from ear to ear. The smell of booze hung in the atmosphere as he lazily wandered through the living room, smiling at your furniture and bursting into uncontrollable chuckles. You wished someone would shoot you — or rather him.
“Have you ever heard of a little something called, oh, I don’t know, calling before showing up at my front yard like the drunk fucking tooth fairy?” you gritted through your teeth. Jerry seemed unfazed.
“Mmm, someone’s… m-mad.”
“What are you doing here, Maguire?” you asked with a sigh, already growing tired of the sight of him. “And care to explain why you’re wearing alien sunglasses during nighttime?”
Jerry laughed as he pointed as his glasses, before removing them to reveal a swollen black eye with a huge cut next to it. You gasped when you saw it, concern washing over you as you rushed to his side for a better look.
“I, um, broke up with Avery.”
Damn, you certainly had not pegged Avery for the violent type. “Too bad, huh,” you mumbled, disappearing into the kitchen in search of an ice tray and a glass of water. When you walked back inside the living room, you found Jerry staring at the fishbowl that was placed on top of your fireplace, muttering something to Flipper, who was swimming without any worries.
“I fucking hate that fish,” he admitted and you held back a laugh as you gestured for him to sit down on the couch.
“What’s going on, Jerry?”
He shrugged. “Honestly? I don’t know. For the past few weeks, I’ve been watching my life fall apart right in front of my eyes. I’m finished. I am fucked! I’m a cautionary tale for everyone, no one trusts me because of that stupid mission statement I wrote after having what I think was two slices of cold, expired pizza and the worst of all is that you and Rod are the only people in my life that ever believed in me. Why are you even still with me? Why haven’t you dropped me yet?”
Your gaze softened and you opted for silence as you carefully let your hand graze the soft skin on his cheek, laying his head back against the couch. You brought the ice cub near his eyelid, feeling him wince as the cold material made contact with the still fresh wound. Jerry closed his eyes, trying to let himself relax against your touch.
“Wanna know why I haven’t left you, Jerry?” you asked and he nodded hesitantly in response. “Because what you think is a stupid memo made me realize that you have more potential than you give yourself credit for. You have something more than a need to succeed, you have a vision. You’re not just doing it for a money and in my brutally honest opinion, you’re more than just a man hiding behind a silver suit.”
You caught him smile at your words.
“You really mean that?”
Your contained smile barely lifted the corners of your mouth as you felt a certain warmth build up on your reddened cheeks. Sure, you’d seen Jerry smile before, but the gentleness and innocence that his soft, genuine beam wore was something you’d never witnessed before in your life. His two front teeth were visible through it and it tugged at your so far cold heartstrings, heating them up.
Your heart was hammering against your chest and your mind had gotten foggy along the way, which was partly the reason why your breath got caught in your throat the very moment you noticed that Jerry’s look had changed. “Do you mean that?” he repeated, this time more lowly.
“I’m still not fond of you.”
“That doesn’t really answer my question.”
You gulped, eyes fixated on his own green ones, which you swore were sparkling under the dim light of your sort of broken lamp. “Yes, I mean it.”
There it was again, that smile. Except this time it had something more to it that you couldn’t read (that you wouldn’t allow yourself to read, because you’d had your own share of drinks that evening and they had left just the right amount of courage in your body to do something stupid and regretful for the next day to feel embarrassed about.)
“What have I ever done to you?”
Jerry’s question sent your dreamy train of thoughts out of the rails, snapping you back into the reality of the things. “What?”
“You don’t like me. Why? What have I done?”
“Frankly, I thought you were just a pretentious jackass like Sugar. Maybe slightly less worse than him, but still pretty much a scumbag. Not to mention that your outbursts make me believe you’ve escaped out of some sort of mental institution centre.”
You never expected Jerry to lunge himself forward and knock the air out of you as his arms wrapped tightly against your sides, squeezing as he buried his head into the crook of your neck. Unsure of what to do, you froze in position, hands stuck uncomfortably on the couch, balling into fists as you bit down on your lip, waiting to breathe again after he pulled away with a hint of disappointment and gloom.
“Not a hugger?” he questioned.
“I just don’t want to be hugging you.”
“Ah, the heartwarming words of kindness.”
“I’m one step away from kicking you out of my house, Maguire. I don’t care if you’re drunk, it’s not my responsibility to take care of you or whatever you think this is. Want a place to crash, then you’re more than welcome to use my phone and third wheel Rod and his family.”
“I like that you’re honest.”
You blinked in surprise. How much had he chugged down before he decided to come over?
“What are you talking about?”
“It’s a quality I’ve never fully owned, you know?”
“You don’t say.”
Jerry didn’t say anything, just looked at you longingly, a silent conversation passing between the two of you. Then suddenly, “No one ever listens to me. When I’m with you, even though you say you hate me, I feel like you understand.”
Gosh, you couldn’t stand him. Was he really so desperate and unable to hold his own that he had to throw himself to whoever showed him the slightest sign of interest? “Jerry, stop.”
“All my life, all I’ve tried to do is talk. Really talk. And it’s not that people don’t listen, it’s that they don’t want to listen. Whatever I have to say just goes straight in and out of their ears. I spoke through my mission statement and you were the only one that actually heard.”
“Don’t.”
You felt your heart momentarily stop as Jerry moved closer to you, his lips alight on your cheek as if a ghost was gently stroking your skin in a silent confession that was so much deeper than what came through the surface.
“I’ll call a taxi. Thanks for not kicking me out. You know, tonight and, uh, generally speaking. I promise I’ll make everything work again and it’ll all be worth it,” he added before placing another kiss on your face, this time on your forehead. Jerry waved goodbye to you as he walked outside and for a strange reason, you found yourself fighting with a newfound desire and urge to both push him in front of a car and never have to see any of him anymore or set fire on the taxi he’d called and invite him back into your home to spend the night. You did neither, didn’t even have the words to say goodnight to him as you heard the door close, signalling that he’d finally left.
What time was it anyway? It felt like he’d been sitting beside you for what seemed like eternity.
The following day at work, you could say that you’d officially lost every will to live. Rod was yelling like crazy, as per usual, which was not helping your raging headache due to the lack of sleep you’d gotten over the night. Jerry Maguire occupying your brain into nightmares wasn’t exactly a chamomile and plate of chocolate chip cookies to help you drift in slumber.
Speaking of, Jerry had just asked you to come into his office, which was the sort of situation you’d been dreading ever since he’d left from your place last night.
“Asked to see me?” you called, voice cracking a little near the end of your sentence, which probably gave you away — fuck’s sake.
“Yeah, um, I wanted to talk,” he tensely replied.
“If it’s about…”
“It’s about last night,” he completed with a jittery tone. “Look, I brought you in a difficult moment. I was drunk and lonely and had no idea what was going on — I didn’t mean to show up like that.”
“Jerry, it’s fine,” you tried to cut him off, putting an end to the already painfully uncomfortable conversation before any other late night actions were mentioned, but apparently, Jerry had plans of his own.
“No, let me finish. I’m sorry I came over without warning and I’m also sorry for taking advantage of… you know, whatever was going through the atmosphere at said moment. But, uh, I feel like I need to let you know that I did and do appreciate everything you said and did for me last night, it was really nice to, um, hear something honest.”
Jerry glanced down at his lap, fingers fidgeting with the pen he was holding. You dared to take a quick look at him, just to see why he refused to meet your gaze, but the lighting from the blinds was dark enough to hide the blooming bush on his cheeks.
“Is that all?”
“Yeah, that’s all.”
“Okay,” you got up from your seat and were about to leave him alone in his thoughts, but your feet subconsciously stopped moving for a second and your body turned towards him as you cleared your throat in order to catch his attention. “Next time you show up at my place in the middle of the night, consider giving me a call first.”
You hurried outside, cursing your mouth for being such a pain in the neck. Whatever professionalism you and Jerry had shared was now long gone.
What you missed, though, was the relieved sigh and small smile that crept into his face when you left the unspoken invitation hanging in the air.
───
It had started getting better with Jerry. A few days (or was it weeks? You couldn’t really tell, because whenever he was around, you’d lose track of time) had passed and what had begun as great hatred for him had turned into tolerance and slight fondness. It was weird how sometimes you’d catch yourself watching Jerry walking away or Jerry smiling or Jerry panicking through the phone — for that matter. The man had gotten under your skin into a worryingly quick time.
For once again, as accustomed to, everything went to hell the moment he came across the struggle of yet another emotional meltdown. Rod was losing and the recruiters and reporters seemed unimpressed with him, which Jerry handled poorly, unable to imagine a scenario where Bob Sugar was laughing at his face for being what his ex fiancée had so successfully described him as; a fucking loser.
He was alone, pissed off with Rod, pissed off with Sugar, with his job, with the company, the circumstances of his daily fucked up life, with you, but mostly with his own self.
You could see he was letting himself have it and this time, you wouldn’t risk it again. So you decided to do what you thought was moral and announce to him that you’d been offered another job opportunity, which you wouldn’t decline.
“You’re leaving me?” he asked in disbelief, wearing that stupid pair of sunglasses again.
“Look at you, Jerry! You’re fucked, how the fuck am I supposed to think you can afford to have me when you don’t even know what you’re doing?”
“Fine! Be like all the others, then, go the fuck on. I don’t need you here anyway. You said it; I don’t know what to do, well you’re fucking right!”
Jerry was shouting and throwing fists at the wall, eyes widened and red, holding back fearful tears.
“You don’t know what it’s like to be me out here. It is an up-at-dawn, pride swallowing siege that I will never fully tell you about, okay? You don’t know anything about my fucking life!”
“And nor am I interested to!” you yelled, throwing your purse across the room, almost hitting him. “You know, if I had even one shred of respect for you before, it’s now kissed goodbye,” you added in a much calmer tone before leaving him, sniffling and holding back hot tears that burned through your eyes. You let them free once you home, streaming down your face like lava.
You didn’t even know what you were crying for.
Last time you checked, you didn’t care about Jerry Maguire raising his voice at you. Last time you checked, you were just a simple accountant who worked for Sports Management International, barely acknowledging his existence.
It was late when the phone rang and after a series of sobs and thousands of tissue packets filling up the rubbish bins, you wondered who it could be.
“Hello?”
“You told me to call.”
He surely heard the hitch sound your breath made when his voice echoed in your head.
“Maguire?”
“Yeah. I know it’s late again and I would be lying if I said that I didn’t want to bother you, because I really, really do. I need to see you, please. It’ll only be a minute, just give me a chance.”
It sounded as though he’d been crying as well, voice raspy, weak, chocked.
“Get lost. I don’t want to talk to you.”
“That’s fine, you don’t need to. I’ll talk enough for both of us. Can I come over? You won’t even notice when I’ll be gone, it’ll be that quick.”
A short inhale, then; “Fine.”
When he arrived, he looked like a mess. His eyelashes looked darker and red, eyes puffy and blurry. His hair was all over the place and you could make out the fact that he was struggling to keep his breathing steady, his lips drawn in tightly. The sight of him in that state almost made you burst into tears all over again.
“Hi,” he greeted lowly, afraid of his voice cracking.
“You have five minutes, Jerry.”
What sort of torture was this? Being just a breath away from breaking down in front of him, making a complete loser move and humiliating yourself, you stared at the ceiling above you, biting so roughly down on your lip that you thought you tasted a bit of blood (but that was just you being dramatic about the whole situation.)
“Five minutes? I’m trying to apologize, I can’t do this being timed! Listen, I—I wanted to say that I was stupid about everything I said earlier, I was having an existential crisis and there were so many emotions bottled up and it just flooded. Flooded all over my brain, which caused me not to think straight, so I took it out on you and—”
Jerry was cut off by the loud thud of your door getting shut. You ignored his restless knocking, walking back into the living room, drawing the thick curtains together when he tried to catch your attention from the windows as well. It took him a great deal of time to eventually give up, motioning to you something that you couldn’t quite understand at first. His hands were moving in a way as though he was saying he slipped something under your door and damn you for believing that the curiosity killed the cat.
When he got out of sight, you tiptoed slowly to the door, grabbing what seemed to be a wrinkly napkin. You wiped your tearing up eyes and read what he’d written on it.
‘You’re right. I do drive people away, but I can’t afford to do that to you too.’
“Jerry Maguire!” you called loudly after him after running outside to catch up with him. Thankfully, he hadn’t gone too far, freezing still at the sound of your voice. He turned around to double check that it wasn’t some sort of mirage his mind was playing on him and let out an exhausted laugh of relief as he walked quickly toward you, grabbing you into a soul crushing hug. He was so tightly pressed up against you that you thought you’d merge into one person, but you couldn’t care enough, returning the intensity of the hug right back.
“Please, just hang on for a little bit more. I’m going to make everything up to you, I can’t fucking lose you, I—” he stopped mid-sentence, stunned at himself as he began pulling away, hands still holding onto your shoulders.
You urged him to continue, clueless about why he’d so abruptly cut himself off just to look at you. It was giving you the creeps, the silence and darkness outside allowing the light breeze to be heard into your eardrums like a loud parade. Jerry was looking at you with such fragility and it hurt that you couldn’t read him, couldn’t understand what was going through that head of his.
His pupils were dilated, blown and dark, causing the green irises to glow under the gloominess of the sky. Jerry was looking at you almost as if…
No. No — this was just your mind being sick.
Jerry left as suddenly and coldly as he’d abandoned his previous sentence, out of any excuses and explanations. You couldn’t bare to question anything, simply leaving it to the way he had, hanging in the air, playing tricks with your imagination, giving you hope for something that you couldn’t fully comprehend either.
Three days later, you accidentally caught yourself shamelessly overhearing him ask Rod how to be able to tell if he’d fallen in love.
───
You were certain that the universe had chosen to make it your destiny to lose and hate Jerry Maguire. It was always one step forward and a whole road trip back. There were moments, many of them, where you thought that the thin line between hate and love had been crossed, but it ended up showing that you couldn’t have been more wrong, ultimately always screwing up — either him or you, you were tired of keeping score at this point — what seemed to make your heart flutter like you were leaving into the dream of a hopeless, predictable romcom movie.
Jerry was hot and cold.
You were up and down.
It was pointless, had been ever since the beginning. You kept losing him, right when your fingers had just grasped him, he kept slipping. It was neither’s fault really; both occupied with the misfortunes of work, trying to psyche Rod up for his big game, consulting endlessly while trying to maintain the already existing deals, raising the prices, focusing on that one client, showing the money — as Jerry liked to put it.
Under the environmental stress of the job, you and Jerry had been unable to connect the same way you did during all those short lived moments, the late night visits, the sleep disrupting calls.
But then, one day he caught you off guard as you’d just finished your duties and were about to take off, making you stop dead in your tracks.
“Do you, um… Are you… I know a great place!”
You stole a quick glance at him and noticed that his fingers were crossed, lips curled into an upward pout, eyes dreamingly bright. There wasn’t much you could say except for pick me up at 8 o’clock. He did exactly as he was told, ringing on your doorbell right on time, but you kept him waiting outside just for a minute, fixing your high heel in a rush. Truth is you’d spent all time trying to figure out the perfect outfit, just for him, just to get to see that one look he’d given you back in that night all over again.
And he did.
When you opened the door to reveal yourself dressed neatly in a velvet black dress that stopped a few inches lower than your thighs, hair flawlessly covering your bare shoulders, Jerry blushed bright red, not sure how to greet you. His jaw was slightly agape in awe, heart pumping fast and loudly against his chest, blood flowing quickly as the butterflies battled in his stomach.
“I— Woah,” he eventually managed. You innocently looked down at yourself, knowing exactly what you were doing to him but deciding to pretend to be oblivious.
“Is there something wrong?”
“You look… Fuck, you look Audrey Hepburn stunning. I feel like an underdressed jerk.”
That was not true, at least not for you. He was wearing a Sacramento colored shirt, with the top button of the collar undone, revealing a white tee. His pants were a simple beige pair of trousers and for the first time, he showed up at your house with his hair looking surprisingly nice.
You chuckled nervously at his comment, matching the scorching redness on his cheeks.
“Are we actually supposed to be nice to each other now?” you spilled out after a few moments, embarrassed by your choice of words.
“I suppose so. Shall we?” Jerry proposed, handing his shoulder out to you playfully. You slapped it away, hurting both his pride and arm, but the minute you realized the disappointment in his eyes, you mentally took a deep breath and linked your hands together, squeezing unintentionally due to the nervousness, but relaxing as you felt his thumb rub circles on the outside of your palm.
The restaurant he’d chosen was beautiful.
He was a gentleman; helping you get seated, pouring water into your glass, handing you the menu. It almost felt like a real date. In anticipation of the food getting served, you went for a small talk, which felt embarrassingly awkward.
“So, uh, how do you know this place?”
“Took Avery here on the third date, I think?”
“Ah.”
Jerry noticed your uneasiness and reached for your hand that was on the table.
“I don’t want to talk about her tonight, though. I’ve got a beautiful woman with me already.”
Your eyes widened comically and you slipped your hand away from his, scratching the back of your neck. “Look, Jerry, I thought this would be a nice way to get to finally know you, you know?”
“It is! I’ll help you get to know me. At work I’ve been all over the fucking place, you probably think I’m insane or something, but, uh, I swear, I’m actually a decent person.”
“Are you? You’ve done nothing to prove me otherwise.”
“I am. Besides, you said that my mission statement inspired you. I wrote that from the heart, put all my thoughts and dreams in there, so I guess I have in fact proven you otherwise.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure, what’s up?”
You gulped in order to gain the confidence to utter the question out, looking deep into his gorgeous green eyes as you tugged a strand of hair behind your ear. “That night, when you came into my house drunk — I just can’t help but wonder why did you come to me instead of Rod? Or anyone else for that matter.”
Jerry tensed up, his Adam’s apple bobbing. He looked as if he was about to confess something and just the thought made your knees jittery.
“As I said that same night, I feel like you understand me in a level no one else does. I was lonely and miserable and had no idea to do with my life and suddenly you were the first person that came into my mind, so I decided to pay you an unwanted visit. The reason I didn’t call was because I know how you feel about me and I could only imagine that you would’ve held a negative attitude if I asked to come over through the phone, so, that’s pretty much how it goes. You’ve been in my mind ever since.”
“Oh, Jerry,” you mouthed in a dazzling tone. No, you couldn’t do this. “Jerry, we need to stop.”
He looked at you through furrowed brows.
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m taking about this. It’s been happening for almost a month now and all I know is that it’s confusing me, but I know for one thing that I can’t bare to put myself through something that I know will end up hurting me. It’s not your fault and it’s not mine either — it’s just our nature. I’m not build like this; I can’t just tiptoe back and forth into whatever the fuck this is, it needs to stop.”
Jerry was more confused than ever, feeling his own eyes well up at the sight of the first tear rolling down your cheek. “What happened?”
“You know what, Jerry — and for fuck’s sake, quit staring at me like I’m your entire world or something!” you said, your voice subconsciously raising. You got up from the chair and roamed through your purse for your wallet, leaving a bunch of money bills on the table as you hesitantly walked over to where he was.
“So what, you just stop talking to me?”
“You and I are both aware that an end needs to be put in this and you’re not strong enough for it, so I’m going to be the one to do it.”
“What if I don’t want you to?”
“It’s not your call,” you whispered, leaning down and taking his head in your hands, pressing it softly against your stomach as you leaned down to place a lingering kiss on the top of it.
“Please don’t leave me,” you heard Jerry choke out, his hands encircling your waist, afraid to let you go.
“You need to focus on Rod. Big game’s coming up and you can both do it. You’ll have a brilliant career, Jerry, I truly believe that and you’ll always have all my support, but you’re just going to have to do this on your own,” were your last words before you walked away, leaving him behind, wrecked, people staring not so discreetly as he held behind the sobs of the following two weeks.
───
Rod was finally getting to be a big deal. Jerry’s career had blossomed again, just as you’d promised to him. Everything in his life was going perfectly — then why did he feel so fucking empty inside? Watching Rod with his family made him hurt, reminiscing about the way you’d left him that day at the restaurant. Hadn’t been able to reach out to you ever since.
Jerry Maguire realised he was in love when his client called him in the spotlight to pose along with him. Nothing like that had ever occurred to him before and it felt so surrealistic, yet so true at the same time. He needed you to be there with him, needed to hear your voice, see you smile. Listen to you say that you were proud of him or even glare at him as if you wanted to burn a hole through his head and finish him.
Jerry was in love with you and it dwelled on him how much he’d actually been missing you.
Not caring about anything, he ran to the airport, knowing he had to make things right. The flight back home was killing him, time passing disgustingly slow for his liking. When he finally got off, he almost tripped towards his way to the taxi station. Precisely forty three minutes and ten seconds, he was finally standing outside of your door, his luggage thrown over his shoulder as he simply stared forward, unable to move.
Was he really doing this?
According to his bachelor video, the only thing he was great at was friendships. But he’d just taken off with his career and he needed to fulfil all the promises he’d made, so there he was, knocking on your door for once more. If you decided you still didn’t want him, then he’d go forever.
“Hello — oh.”
His breath disappeared when he saw you. How long had it really been? You were surprised, not expecting him at all. Your movements were limited, limbs completely in shock as you scooted away to let him in. Your mind was short circuiting as he looked around the place like nothing had happened, like the two of you hadn’t had talked in — was it months? Or just weeks that felt like decades?
“Hello. If this is where it has to happen, then this is where it has to happen,” Jerry began. You cocked your head in confusion, staring blankly at him. “I'm not letting you get rid of me. How about that? This used to be my specialty. You know, I was good in a living room. They’d send me in there, and I’d do it alone. And now I just... But tonight, our little project, our company had a very big night — a very, very big night. But it wasn’t complete, wasn’t nearly close to being in the same vicinity as complete, because I couldn’t share it with you. I couldn’t hear your voice or laugh about it with you. I missed you, I missed having you around. We live in a cynical world, and we work in a business of tough competitors. I love you. You complete me. And I just —”
“Shut up,” you mustered through tears. “Just shut up. You had me at ‘hello’.” And before you even knew what was happening, you were walking towards him, crashing your lips onto his hard with a fervent need you’d never known before. His hands wrapped around your waist, pulling you impossibly close to his body as he smiled through the kiss, feeling you reciprocate the action. Both you and Jerry were still crying, unable to hold back the tears of what could’ve happened ages ago if either of you had had the balls to actually pursue it.
But neither of you cared.
Because you were finally kissing Jerry Maguire and your life felt complete, just as he’d described. He completed you and you completed him and the feeling had you melting against him, knees buckling, mind dizzy from his words and his scent and the way he so perfectly belonged against your lips. Your heart nearly leapt out of your chest as he pulled away, trying to catch his breath.
“I love you so much. I’ve loved you ever since you came with me when I got fired. I wouldn’t be where I am right now without you,” Jerry said, leaning his forehead against yours as he cupped your cheeks, holding you gently and lovingly.
“I love you Jerry Maguire.”
FIN.
i wrote this for my favourite girl @honeymvnt , hope you enjoy beautiful !! 🫶🏼🎀
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elysianrey · 1 year
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Two halves of a heart hardly beating alone
But now that I've found you, I'm not letting go
a playlist curated by Anthony Lockwood that reminds him of Lucy.
•perfectly broken: banners • before you: benson boone • love brought weight: old sea brigade • hello!: role model • don’t give up on me: rivvrs • loving you: seafret • ode to a conversation stuck in your throat: del water gap • hey girl: stephen sanchez • little bit more: suriel hess • missing you: stephen sanchez, ashe •i guess i’m in love: clinton kane • resin: dustin tebbutt • see, i’m sorry: seafret • ghost town: benson boone • looking at me like that: vance joy • rose: honest men • home: newcoast • to be so lonely: harry styles • iloveyou: between friends • picture perfect: jole • let me hold you: nick wilson • unrequited love (& other cliches): breakup shoes • flightless bird, american mouth: iron & wine • banks: needtobreathe
listen to the rest here
note: obviously, I could not let my lucy playlist go unaccompanied without its other half, and I am forever grateful to, @genniearts, who made this aboslutely gorgeous locklyle piece to depict the vibes. I will continue to update the list as I find new music! I hope all of you authors, artists, and shippers enjoy. x
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themisterhip · 4 months
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HAPPY NEW YEAR FOR YOU ALL!!🎉🎉🎉
Sorry for the lack of art, very busy! So, i give you this very sexy saitama as a blessing for this year <3
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cerleansky · 2 years
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I think the hardest thing about having parents who didn’t express affection is letting yourself be loved. It took me a long time to realise my friends do want to spend time with me, celebrate my birthday, hug me when I achieve something.
My best friend tells me she loves me all the time and the world doesn’t end.
It feels revolutionary to embrace these acts of love even if it’s temporary, even if the people in my life aren’t forever.
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