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dollslayer · 3 years

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Dark!Librarian!Steve Rogers x Shy!Reader, College AU

Summary: Your late nights at the university library spark a chain of events. Will they lead to your undoing? To anyone else's?

W/C: 8,890 (oops, sorry)

Warnings: DARK themes, NO MINORS, stalking, murder, minor character death, smut, angst, unprotected sex, oral sex, alcohol consumption, swearing

A/N: FINALLY, I wrote this for @darkficsyouneveraskedfor's 2 Years of Darkness challenge! This fic kicked my ass but after some months I'm so excited about it! This is my first truly dark fic so please don't read if any of these topics upset you but I do want to make a note that the sex is consensual. If I missed any warnings please DM me immediately and I will add them. Reblog/comment if you liked it! Maybe even check out some of my other fics 👀 Cheers!

Main Masterlist

You stumbled slightly on the uneven pavement as you made the final steps towards the graduate school library. It was always so much quieter than the undergrad library and at this hour there’d be a good chance it was just you and the poor person stuck working the overnight help desk. You didn’t mind that though, you were never an overly sociable person and you preferred to work alone anyways.

You swiped your student ID through the sensor and the little green light granted you entry as you opened the door. Looking around there wasn’t even someone at the desk, just the sound of the always-on A/C rattling the leaves of the fake plants in the lobby.

You moved to put your ID away when it slipped from your fingers and plapped onto the floor, your own face staring back up to you from the plastic. You sighed and swung your bag further back over your shoulder as you bent to pick it up when a pair of legs edged their way into your vision. Caught off guard by the man attached to them, you watched him bend to pick up the piece of plastic.

You both straightened back up to your full heights and you found yourself looking up at him. He had clear blue eyes and sandy blond hair that was swept back. He looked like he could be a model, he was so handsome and you felt like a deer in headlights.

You realized that he had your ID in his hand and was waiting patiently for you to take it. You smiled awkwardly and took it from him. He looked back to your card and read your name out loud and snapped you out of your thoughts.

“Thank you” you said more in surprise than gratitude “Sorry, I just, I could’ve sworn no one was here you came out of nowhere” You laughed nervously, hoping to hide your embarrassment. You were never good with talking to people and once a situation got awkward you just got yourself deeper in it.

“I was just coming around the corner when I noticed you dropped your ID. I actually work the late shift at the desk. Serves me right for applying last minute for work through the university, right?” He asked with a small laugh.

“Late night cram session? You look like your back’s about to snap from holding all those books” He pointed to your bag, the stitches of it’s straps were frayed and had been sewn over a couple of times.

“Yeah, I like coming here late, hardly anyone’s here, I don’t have to deal with people and I can just focus” You explained

“Right, well, sorry to keep you. If you need anything I’m Steve, and I’ll be bored out of my mind at the desk” he smirked and walked back towards reception.

You turned down the hall and thought how strange it was that you’d never seen him here before. It was the middle of the semester so he couldn’t have just started but you were in here all the time and you’d never run into him once. You brushed the thought off and continued on your way.

____

Over the next few weeks you and Steve developed a routine. You’d come in around 10 or 11, you’d stop at the desk and chat a bit and then you’d head up to your spot on the second floor to study. Occasionally Steve would see you when he returned books and you’d joke around a bit before he’d leave you to your work. You were building a good rapport with each other and he was pleased.

Sometimes he’d been too shy to approach you. It made him feel like the scrawny, helpless kid he was before the growth spurt. Beautiful girls like you never looked twice at him but he knows that you’re different, he knows that if you had met him then that you’d never treat him like those girls did. He knows that in time you two could really have something special.

Steve understood that building a relationship with you would take time and balance. He didn’t want to seem too eager but ever since he saw you he knew he’d do anything to just talk to you.

It started some months ago when he was visiting Bucky on campus. They had been hanging out in the quad right by a group of buildings when you tripped on the pavement and your books fell at his feet. He helped you up and even collected your books for you but you were too flustered and embarrassed to meet his eye. You eked out a thank you and scurried into the graduate library.

That moment sparked a blooming obsession within him. The following night he was still in town but he went out without Bucky and staked out where he’d been the previous night and watched you go to the library at the same time you had. The next two nights he did this and quickly pieced together your nightly routine.

Within a month's time he was set to transfer for the next semester and when he did he got a job working night shifts at the library. Bucky had asked him why on Earth he’d want that and Steve had shrugged him off, claiming that he wanted to be paid and didn’t want to deal with anyone. Seemed like a good enough reason to anyone else.

And so that’s how Steve found himself invading your personal space to hand you your ID. He enjoyed the way you trembled slightly in surprise. You looked so small next to him, looking up at him. He nearly forgot what he was going to say, feeling suddenly shy himself. You were so close to him and you were just as beautiful as he remembered.

Take it slow, he reminded himself.

____

Your apartment door slammed behind you as you stormed out of the building. You left in only what you were wearing which was a light hoodie and some leggings. You had thought to grab your book bag before you left and it kept knocking into your side with each angry step you took. Tears streaked your face but you tried your best to brush them off and continued on your brisk walk to the library.

You and your boyfriend had gotten into a fight and things got heated pretty fast, they always did with Sean. You had confronted Sean about being gone so often and so late, you’d missed him and wanted to spend time with you. That’s when he started getting defensive and turning your late nights at the library right around on you.

Things escalated to shouting and Sean had gotten so angry that he’d knocked over a pile of your books from the table. It had scared you and that’s when you left. You knew that you’d be getting nowhere with him when he was so angry. You wanted to be alone and needed a distraction so you grabbed your bag and headed for the library.

You secretly hoped Steve was working, it’d be nice to see a friendly face. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t have the tiniest crush on him. He’s handsome and funny and kind and he always knows when to give you space. You wish you’d met him at a different point in your life, you could really see yourself with him in another timeline. Maybe it was just easier to think that having just had a fight with Sean.

You swiped your card and waited patiently for the door to open. You could tell Steve had already spotted you and was looking at you as you passed through the glass doors. He was smiling his same boyish charm smile that made you feel even shier than you already were. You must’ve looked a mess but it was comforting to see him there waiting for you.

“There she is,” Steve said with a smile as he got up from his chair to greet you. His face immediately fell though as he took in the tracks of your tears and your puffy eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Steve looked upset and angry for you. You were touched, but you’d rather leave it.

“I’d rather not talk about it, if it’s okay. It’s nice to see you though, Steve. How’s your night?”

Steve’s jaw ticked but he swallowed and nodded and you were grateful he didn’t push it further.

“Uneventful as usual, it’s good to see you too, doll.”

You felt your cheeks heat at the nickname. If you were on better terms with Sean you’d feel bad but you couldn’t find it in yourself to do anything but giggle.

You said your goodbye to Steve and made your way to the second floor to study.

Hours passed and you had your nose buried in a book when you felt a sudden presence. You looked up slowly behind you and shrieked when you found Steve just inches from you. He held his hands out defensively and tried to catch your breathing.

“Steve, oh my God, I didn’t see you there, you scared me!” You laughed as you caught your breath.

“Yeah, sorry, I uh, have a habit of doing that.” He said as he ducked his head sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck. Was he blushing? Why did he look nervous?

“I, um. I was uh, I was hoping to maybe ah, ask you something, actually.” Steve swallowed thickly. He is nervous. You smiled at him and motioned for him to go on.

“I was thinking… maybe, when you’re free if um, would you maybe want to go to dinner? With me?” He stammered out.

You smiled and felt heat flood your cheeks all over again, Steve was gorgeous and you were flattered that someone like him would want to go out with you. Just as quickly as that flattery came dread had instantly replaced it. You had a boyfriend, you couldn’t do that to Sean. Oh God, now I have to turn him down. What if he hates me?

“Wow… I uh, Steve,” you started, “I’m. You’re so sweet, I don’t know what to say. But, I have a boyfriend, I’m really sorry”

“But- but don’t think I wouldn’t say yes, if I could. You’re such a nice guy and I’m really happy for our friendship. I hope this doesn’t make things weird between us, I’m. I’m sorry,” You quickly led up with. You felt so awkward and bad that you had to turn him down.

Steve’s jaw ticked and he looked away. A blush of embarrassment had made its way up his neck and into his cheeks. His fists clenched at his sides and he took a deep breath.

“It’s… It’s fine, I’m sorry, I didn’t know. I don’t want things to be weird between us either. You know what? Why don’t we just forget the whole thing? Sorry again.” He finished with a tight lipped smile

You sent an uneasy smile back and nodded.

“Of course, no damage done, Steve.”

With that he left you and you went back to your book. You tried not to overthink the entire situation but couldn’t help but feel slightly uncomfortable.

____

“Boyfriend” the word echoed in his head on a never ending loop with deafening reverb. He nodded curtly at you and smiled. You had your awkward exchange of apologies and excuses. Wordlessly, he made his way back to the information desk. He felt angry but also humiliated, he had spent at least a week building himself up to say something to you and you just turned him down so wholly?

He saw the way you looked at him, the way you laughed at his jokes. Steve knew that he meant more to you than you were letting on. There was attraction there, you were just in denial because you had a boyfriend.

Who even was this schmuck? You couldn’t have liked him that much because if you did then you would’ve mentioned him before but you hadn’t. If you really loved your boyfriend then you wouldn’t have smiled at Steve the way you did or stopped to say hello every night. He needed to see for himself whom exactly it was that was so undeserving of your attention.

Steve checked the cameras and saw that you were packing up your things. He had maybe a few minutes to gather his own things and wait for you. There was someone else coming to cover the library in 20 minutes, it would be fine if he left it alone until then. He decided to make himself scarce from the desk so you wouldn’t have to see him again before you left and you wouldn’t notice he’d be following you.

Waiting for the sound of the double doors to click shut he turned the corner and waited for just a minute. He slunk down the mainways of campus towards the student apartments and stopped just 20 yards away from you up against a wall. You looked so cold all alone in the dark as you buzzed in one of the numbers.

“1B, what the fuck could you possibly want at this hour?” a gruff voice answered over the comm.

“Baby, it’s me, sorry I forgot my keys but you weren’t responding to my texts so” You trailed off as you shivered in the night. No reply came, just the buzzer sounding off. You hurried inside and Steve tried his best to scope out external windows.

Finally the light came on in one of them and to his luck the blinds were mostly open. Through the vertical slats he could make out your entrance and an impeding figure from the hall. It was him, the boyfriend. The guy that was apparently so much better than Steve.

He saw your body language was tense and you opened your mouth to speak but before you could get a word in, your boyfriend was grabbing your face in his hands and kissing you. You looked surprised maybe, but you just let him grab you like that. You just fucking let him.

He watched from his spot against a pillar from the building across the walkway. He clenched his jaw and tried to control his breathing watching this guy, this boy manhandle you like you weren’t something special, something precious. He was disgusted but he couldn’t look away as your clothes were shirked off and you two fucked right there on the couch.

He couldn’t bring himself to watch anymore and stormed off. As he walked back to his place a plan began to form in the back of his mind.

____

Things with Sean were smoothed over. You didn’t really talk, so much as he just fucked you before you could even talk about it. He had kissed you on the cheek after and said he was sorry. So you figured that he was. You didn’t really feel like pushing it anyways.

You made for the library once again, anticipating a long night ahead of you with midterms around the corner.

You let out a shriek as you realized someone was standing over you. Steve was hovering right above you, looking even taller than he already was. You pushed your chair back to get some distance between yourself and him while you caught your breath from the momentary scare.

“Steve, I uh, sorry I didn’t hear you coming, again.”

He leaned himself against the edge of the table and crossed his arms. How had you not realized he was so muscular before? You flushed and scolded yourself for thinking about him like that. You had a boyfriend and Steve was just the nice guy at the library.

He ducked his head shyly and waved your apology off.

“Sorry, guess I’m just sneaky.” He chuckled in amusement but the feeling wasn’t mutual, “I was just up here returning some books when I realized I missed you coming in, thought I’d come say hi.”

“Right,” you replied, “Guess we just missed each other. How’s the desk tonight?”

“Bored to tears as usual, just glad you’re here tonight”

Steve winked at you and you felt your cheeks get hot again and you looked away with a small laugh.

“You always know just what to say, don’t you?”

“Ah that’s not true.” He paused, “I get nervous all the time around pretty girls like you”

You were really in it now. Your cheeks heated instantly and you had to look away from him again. For someone that just got rejected he doesn’t stay down for long. How the hell were you going to talk your way out of this one? He knows you have a boyfriend, why would he say that?

“Anyway, I’ll leave you to it.” Oh, thank God.

He begins to walk back to his cart before spinning on his heel one last time.

“Hey, I forgot to ask. You’re pretty good with art history, right?”

You nod cautiously, afraid that you know where this is going.

“Well, as of right now I’ve got a C. I was wondering if you’d be willing to meet on one of my nights off here and help me out?”

“O-oh. Yeah, of course. No problem. I’m sure Sean wouldn’t mind.”

You were too nice for your own good, saying yes before really thinking it all through. You only realized you had after the words left your mouth so you mentioned Sean to save yourself a bit.

Steve’s eyes crinkled in the corners as he smiled at you.

“Awesome, you’re the best. Maybe we can get together at that cafe on 3rd next Tuesday around noon?”

“Of course, I’ll be there” You confirm.

____

Tuesday couldn’t come soon enough for Steve. He didn’t need any help in art history, he was averaging about an 87, actually. But when you turned him down he knew he had to find another way to get closer to you and he knew that you’d say yes out of pressure.

All in all things were going pretty well for Steve. Despite your shy nature he’d managed to get closer to you much quicker than he expected. He loved watching you get flustered whenever he was close, finding it hard not to get flustered himself. He was impatient for things to move forward but he knew it would all pan out. There was only one wrench in the plan; your boyfriend Sean.

The other night when Steve had followed you home and witnessed Sean manhandle you in your apartment he began thinking of how to remove him from the picture. Steve did his research on Sean and found it suspicious he couldn’t find anything on him. Usually after a little digging you can find something off about anyone, but not him. Steve knew it would take a little more effort, but for you he’d make it.

So that’s how Steve wound up spending his night off in the corner of the dive bar that was just off campus. Off campus enough that you’d need to drive there. He had tailed Sean’s Jeep there after his club soccer game in hopes of finding something he could actually use to justify getting rid of him for you. He groused as he pulled into the parking garage across the street and pocketed his parking stub. He waited a few beats and watched Sean leave his car.

He slinked in the door and grabbed a dimly lit corner booth. The residue of whatever cleaner this place used was causing his forearms to stick to the table at his booth and the air stunk of vape smoke. He was surrounded by other 20-somethings, awkward Tinder hookups and frat bros meeting up to blow off steam.

On the opposite side of the room he spotted Sean, watched him as he approached the bar for another pint. He’d followed him here in hopes of getting some sort of information on him that he could use. After an hour of nursing one beer and absolutely nothing happening with Sean Steve had been ready to give up.

Just as he was getting ready to down the rest of his drink the door had opened and in walked a girl around his age. She looked nervous but excited as she looked around the place. She nearly squealed as she rushed over when she found who she was looking for. A smile slowly crawled across Steve’s face as the girl rushed into Sean’s arms and embraced him with a kiss. This is exactly what Steve needed to get him out of the picture.

Steve discreetly took out his phone and snapped a few photos, even got a video of them kissing again. He figured this would be enough to blackmail Sean into leaving you. Getting what he needed, he grabbed his jacket and left the bar. He felt light as a feather walking home, his plan was finally setting into motion and it wouldn’t be long until you were together.

Tuesday had finally come and Steve’s good mood only carried over. He practically skipped to the coffee shop you two had agreed to meet at. He grabbed a table and waited for you. When he saw you open the door he was grinning ear to ear but his expression quickly changed taking in your appearance. You looked exhausted, like you’d been crying again. This wouldn’t do.

“What’s wrong? Is it your boyfriend again?” Steve asked.

You nodded silently and set down your bag with a huff.

“He’s just been out really late lately, I feel like he’s never home. Then again I’m always out late.”

“Well I’m glad you’re a night owl, otherwise we wouldn’t have met” Steve tried to turn the conversation back to them and to keep it positive.

“I guess you’re right. You didn’t order anything?” You frowned, noticing his empty hands.

“I was waiting for you, it’s my treat.” You opened your mouth to protest but Steve was quick to add, “Don’t even try to argue with me on this one.”

You sighed but ultimately relented, following him to the counter. He let you order first.

“Um, just a small hot chocolate please, thank you so much”

Steve thought it was cute that you didn’t drink caffeine, he knew hot chocolate was your drink of choice. He knew this of course from hours of pouring over every profile of yours he could find on the internet. He even found your tumblr you were just sure nobody knew about. Turns out you’ve got quite the dirty mind. But that was a thought for another day. Steve turned back to the counter and ordered black coffee and paid the bill.

With drinks in hand you made your way back to your table and settled in for an afternoon of art history. It went smoothly overall and Steve even got you to laugh a few times. He’d perfectly played his balance of pretending not to know about the subject while seeming to be learning what you were teaching. He could tell you felt proud of yourself for accomplishing something and he was happy he could make you feel that way. He was sure he was the only one that could.

You called it a day and said your goodbyes, you went in for an awkward hug which Steve accepted wholeheartedly. He’d even managed to finally snag your number so you two could work out more study times. Maybe you were coming around much easier than he anticipated. He smiled to himself and on the walk home began to devise a plan to get rid of Sean. It’d only be a matter of days if everything went accordingly.

____

You were basking in the rare day off, taking every moment to enjoy doing absolutely nothing. You’d felt drained lately from your class workload, late nights at the library, and your elevating fights with Sean. He was at work today followed by an evening class so you had uninterrupted alone time. Around 10pm it took every ounce of your free will to get off the couch and get the mail.

You milled over to your box and jammed the key in. Pulling the mail out your head titled in curiosity at the large unmarked manila folder. No return address written, only yours but there was nothing indicating whether it was for you or Sean. You’d open it when you got back upstairs.

Finally back to your spot on the couch your fingers slowly undid the folder’s metal clasp and you reached inside for its contents. Out came several photos and a hastily written note. You held the grainy photos closer to your face to make out what they were. When you did your heart plummeted and you went into emotional shock.

Though the photos were grainy it was very clear what they were of. Shots of Sean and some mystery brunette making out in a bar. Sean with his arm around her waist, Sean with his hand on her ass. All the photos were timestamped for only a few days ago when he claimed his soccer game was running late. You dropped them instantly and they scattered to the floor.

Your heart was hammering in your ears, you didn’t know what to think. Sean was the only boyfriend you’d ever really had, Sean loved you, you loved him. Somewhere in the back of your mind you remembered there was a note. You searched for it and tried to read it through the tears that were beginning to blur your vision.

‘I know what you did. You tell her or I will. You have three days’

You didn’t recognize the handwriting. Who would send this? Why would they send it? You and Sean didn’t have many friends and you couldn’t picture them doing this. Maybe this is some prank? Maybe the timestamp is wrong and this is before you were together.

Sean was all you’d ever known and you shared an apartment, it’s not like you’d have anywhere to go or anyone to turn to. Should you confront him with these? It’s not like you two were exactly good at solving your problems. Would he leave you if you showed him these? What then?

Your mind was spinning, unsure of what to do with this new information. Maybe you could keep quiet about this, try to spend some more time with Sean, make him see what the two of you have. Maybe you can ask him to be home more, maybe you could be home more too.

You took a deep breath and wiped your tears before you gathered the photos and put them back into the envelope. You decided you’d hold onto them for now, tucking them away in your drawer of the dresser. Deciding you’d just work yourself up if you stayed up you shot Sean a text goodnight and went to bed.

Morning came and he was snuggled into your side, the comfort you felt had you feeling like everything might be okay for a moment. You stayed in bed just a little longer and turned so he could hold you in his arms. Your heart felt so unsure and scared, but you didn’t know what else you could do.

The week passed by and you decided to shift more of your energy towards your relationship with Sean, pushing your nights at the library to the backburner. You still hadn’t told him about the envelope but you did tell him you missed him and wished he was home more. He relented and was home four nights this week instead of his usual two.

The time together was uncomfortable but you kept telling yourself that things were getting a little better over time, even if your studies were suffering for it. As the week went on you were able to suppress your doubts about your relationship a bit more. Sean loved you and you loved him.

You couldn’t ignore the oncoming threat of midterms forever, though. The last thing you wanted was to be alone because you knew that your thoughts would just spiral but you needed to do well this semester so you grabbed your bag and headed out.

You swipe through the doors, almost looking forward to seeing Steve. You’d blown off your study session with a profuse apology so you could be with Sean. You were eager to apologize in person but found the reference desk to be completely abandoned. You frowned, maybe Steve was putting away books or something. You’d see him eventually though, for now you had an essay to write.

Hours could have gone by and you wouldn’t have known. You were getting so much done though, it felt good to be focused on something other than your own thoughts.

“Where’ve you been?”

You jump in your seat. You turn around to find Steve emerging from the shelves that were just out of your view. He wore a neutral expression but you could cut the tension with a knife. He stepped forward and you debated on what to say.

“Sorry, I had to cancel with you this week. How are you getting along?”

“Nothing another tutoring session couldn’t fix, I’m sure. Were you sick? I feel like you haven’t been here in forever. The nights get awful lonely without ya here”

Why did Steve keep making statements like that when he knew you had a boyfriend? It was driving you insane and getting harder to ignore them.

“Um, no, I was with Sean, actually. But y’know, can’t avoid midterms forever” You gave a half-hearted laugh hoping to lighten things up.

Steve’s neutral expression is slipping, but you can’t tell if he’s angry or not. But his face broke out into a small smile, putting you at ease instantly. He clapped you on the shoulder and took a step back.

“Yeah, guess you’re right. We still on for Tuesday?”

You gave him an easy smile and nodded.

“I’ll be counting the days” With that Steve disappeared back between the shelves.

____

The moment Steve placed the envelope in the mail he felt a confidence he hadn’t felt before. All he had to do was wait for you to open the envelope and everything would take its course. He knew Sean was at work and you’d be the one to get the mail that day. From his spot he’d peered in your windows all those weeks ago he watched you open the photos. You dropped them to the ground and held a hand to your mouth to cover what looked like a sob. Steve smiled to himself, now all you had to do was leave him.

The week went on and Steve figured you might need a little time to break it off and he’d be there at the library, waiting to comfort you. It’s not like you had any other friends in your life to turn to. But then you cancelled your study session with no explanation. Steve figured maybe you were still in shock, needed to cry it out alone. Then two days turned to four turned to seven.

Steve was confused, he was infuriated even. Why hadn’t you come to the library yet? Why hadn’t you texted him? There’s no way that you were actually going to stay with him after you saw him with another woman. Except that’s exactly what he did.

Looking back on it Steve recognized his mistakes. He knew you were shy and meek, sweet, it’s what he loved about you. But he should’ve accounted for this to happen. You were too sweet for your own good, wanting to make it work with Sean. It was an obstacle he hadn’t seen but this is just a slight bump in the plan. He can work around it.

When he saw you coming up the steps on the security camera he made himself scarce, not ready to face you just yet. He gave you some hours to study before he made himself known to you. He could tell just by the way you talked that you were in complete denial about what was happening. You weren’t strong enough to leave him but that’s okay, Steve is strong enough for the both of you right now, he’ll help you get there.

____

Just when you thought things were getting better Sean was back to becoming distant, going out with his teammates and coming home still a little drunk. The more you thought about those photos and thought about how he slipped back into old habits so easily the more you were working up the courage to confront him. You weren’t sure if you’d leave him, but maybe it would make him change.

Then the second envelope came. More photos of them kissing and leaving the bar together. They were time stamped just two nights ago. Your heart fell through the floor as you tried to make sense of things. How much of this could you put up with? When was enough? You needed to confront him when he got home.

You texted him to try to come home early tonight, saying it was important. You spent the rest of the evening planning out your words and trying to quell the oncoming panic attacks. Time passed by in a blur and before you knew it it was midnight and you still had no word from Sean. You couldn’t spend one more minute alone, you needed to get out. You needed a friend.

Your body was on autopilot as your feet carried you up the steps of the library. Steve wasn’t at the desk and you felt almost distressed. You knew he’d be a good third party to talk all this out to and you didn’t know what to think when he wasn’t there. You decided to shoot him a text.

‘Hey, I know you usually work Thursdays, I’ll be at my usual spot, I could really use a friend if you’re not too busy’ Did that sound too desperate? At this point you didn’t care.

You sunk down into your chair on the second floor with a huff. You hadn’t brought your bag so it’s not like you could study to distract yourself. As it turned out you didn’t need to.

“I’m never too busy for you, doll. ‘Specially not at this job” Steve’s voice carried as he rounded a corner into your sight.

You felt instantly better before you realized you were crying. It was hard to be vulnerable but if you could trust anyone with this it was Steve. You gave him a weak smile as he pulled up a chair beside you.

“What’s wrong? Do you need tissues?”

“No, sorry, I just.” You were struggling to find the words. “Sean is cheating on me”

Steve’s hands clenched into fists, he looked absolutely furious for you.

“Are you serious? That bastard! Doll, I’m so sorry. Have you confronted him?” His hand reached for yours and his thumb rubbed light circles.

“I-I, I haven’t said...anything. I just. He loves me y’know? Why would he do that? He’s all I have? What happens if he leaves me where will I stay I’ll be completely alone, I’ll-”

You had worked yourself into a panic attack as you desperately tried to take gulps of air while tears streamed down your face. You were losing touch with your surroundings and spiraling into a place you couldn’t get yourself out of. Steve moved his chair closer to you and brought you into his lap. He held your back to his chest and wrapped his arms around you. You could just make out what he was saying.

“Doll, it’s okay, I need you to breathe with me, can you do that? Take a deep breath in with me. Hold it and count to five with me,” You do but you’re still struggling. “Now exhale, count again for me. You’re doing so well, you can do this.”

Eventually Steve is able to bring you back down to Earth and you slumped back into his arms. You don’t care that Steve is holding you, it feels safe. You shifted so you could lean your head against his chest and let out a heavy sigh. He holds you to himself and lets you sit there for a while.

You don’t know how much time passes but you sit up slowly and he’s reluctant to let you go. You wipe your eyes as you go back to your own chair.

“Sorry, I’m keeping you from your job. Sorry I just totally came here and freaked out” You were starting to feel embarrassed, oversharing your life and emotions with him. You really liked him, you didn’t want to think you’d ruined the friendship.

“Don’t even apologize. You can always come to me.” He gave you a warm smile and you felt reassured. “So what are you going to do about Sean?”

Another hour had gone by with Steve and you could see the sun starting to come through the windows. You had decided you would confront him and go from there. You weren’t ready to fully commit to leaving him but this needed to end one way or another. For the first time in two weeks you felt like things were maybe going to be okay. The next time you saw Sean you were going to confront him.

____

Clearly seeing that you weren’t going to do anything after he sent the photos, he had to go to plan B. Steve waited outside the practice field and followed him to the parking structure once again. He jammed the parking stub in his jacket pocket along with the others and repeated his previous trips here. It was astounding how unaware Sean was of his surroundings, Steve had followed him and that girl from the bar back to her place at least twice now.

Getting what he needed he put another envelope in the mail the next day, this time with no note but the photos were more upsetting. It hurt Steve to hurt you but it’s what needed to be done. You were never going to confront him with things as they were so he had to push the envelope, literally and metaphorically. The hurt would be worth it though, because you came crying to him just like he’d hoped you would. Seeing your text warmed his heart, you needed him and he’d be there. Every time.

He knew he’d be comforting you but he didn’t think that he’d get to hold you. He was hiding his smile as he wrapped his arms around you and brought you down from your panic attack. You did so well listening to him and calming down. He was convinced he was the only one that could help you, you just needed to see that.

Steve abandoned his cart of books that needed to be shelved but he couldn’t care less. He’d stay up all night with you every night if that’s what it took. As dawn broke the two of you devised a plan and he built you up to say something. You weren’t committed to leaving him, which Steve wasn’t happy about, but you were committed to confronting him, if only you’d get the chance.

Based on what Steve knew of both yours and Sean's schedules you’d just miss each other between classes during the day and Sean had a game tonight, which would inevitably lead to a night at the bar. All Steve had to do was wait. He had to contain his excitement, things were finally finally falling right into place, they just needed a final push.

Nightfall came and this time Steve beat Sean to the structure. Steve parked on the top level and stuck the parking stub in his pocket. He didn’t feel like he was taking a risk by counting on Sean to follow routine, he was a good boy, he’d park in his same spot he always did and proceed to get wasted across the street.

A slow smile creeped across Steve’s face as Sean and his teammates stumbled into the bar, probably already drunk from pre-gaming. Sean’s sidepiece wouldn’t come to the bar tonight, her sorority having some dumb mixer or another. Steve reminded himself of his mantra to wait. His phone buzzed and he saw it was a text from you. You two had been texting after you came to him in the library.

‘He’s not responding to my texts. I know he had a game tonight but I really thought he’d be here’

He’d have to text you back another time, Steve needed to be on his toes tonight. He sat at what was becoming his usual booth for nearly two hours, barely touching his pint. Finally Sean paid his tab and said goodnight to his friends. Steve pulled down the brim of his hat and pursued him towards the parking structure. Drunken and fumbling up through the stairwell, Steve entered behind him quietly while taking out a knife he’d stolen from Bucky. He always knew his friend’s strange obsession with them would come in handy someday.

Just as Sean was about to take the final step Steve grabbed him from behind. Sean’s reactions may have been slowed but it hadn’t stopped him trying to thrash out of the grip. His efforts stopped immediately as Steve held the blade to his throat. He spoke clearly and in a low voice.

“Keep walking up the stairs or I will slit your fucking throat, do you hear me?” He brought the knife closer to his neck to drive home the threat.

“E-easy man, please, please don’t do this”

“Keep moving. Up.”

Steve pushed him all the way towards his car at the edge of the top level. He flipped Sean around so his back was to the ledge, the knife still trained closely on him. Pleads for mercy fell on deaf ears.

“What do you wan’!? You wan’ money!? Take, take my wallet man I don’t need it, jus’ please don’t kill me please!”

Steve pushed him slightly, though his grip on him remained tight. Sean struggled against him as his body weight wavered over the ledge. He must have realised how far up they were because he started crying at this point, begging even harder as he teetered and trying desperately to get his bearings against the wall.

“Why are you doing this!?” He wailed, “I’ll do anything, please! Please, I have a girlfriend, I have a family”

That was all that it took. Steve was feeling a high like he’d never felt. He knew at this moment he was doing the right thing for both of you. With a rush of adrenaline and in a flash of certainty he pushed Sean’s body over the edge. He didn’t watch him fall the seven stories down to the ground, but he did wait to hear the sickening crack and thud of his body hitting the ground. There was no way he’d survived.

Blood rushing through his ears, he felt euphoric, so powerful, so in love with you. He climbed back into his car and headed for his apartment. His plan wasn’t quite complete yet though, but everything he needed to do was done. He could watch the rest unfold from the sidelines. He knows you’ll be heartbroken all over again when you find out, but he’ll be there to pick up the pieces.

____

You’d been in mourning for nearly two months. The shock you’d felt wasn’t comparable to any other feeling you’d felt. The police ultimately ruled his death an accident, they performed an autopsy and found dangerous amounts of alcohol in his system. They weren’t able to pinpoint an exact time of death but estimated 2-3 AM, as he’d been found in the morning. They figured he’d just gotten piss drunk and came too close to the edge. And he was gone just like that.

His death weighed heavy on you, you blamed yourself for a long time. He wouldn’t have stayed out if you hadn’t pushed him so far away from you. The last thing you ever said to him was nagging and whiny, no wonder he didn’t want to come home. To think that you were possibly going to leave him. You felt so much self-contempt but slowly you were learning to forgive yourself.

You don’t know what you’d have done without Steve by your side. He was there for you every step of the way. He held you at the funeral, he helped you pack up Sean’s things in the apartment, he took your late night phone calls and came over at the drop of a hat to help you through your grief. You were eternally grateful for his selflessness and his willingness to help you heal.

Guilt loomed over you once again as the old feelings you’d had for Steve in the early days of your friendship started to flare up again. It felt natural to feel them, with him being closer to you than he ever was, but it didn’t stop you from feeling shame over it. You had to remind yourself that you weren’t culpable for anything that happened, that Sean himself was interested in someone else when he’d died. You had to forgive yourself for these feelings for Steve. Maybe even pursue them.

‘Can you come over tonight? I think we should talk’ Your nerves were on fire from the rush you got sending him that text.

‘How about you come to my place? 7? We can go for something to eat if you want.’ Your heart was fluttering, was this a date?

‘Sounds good :)’

Checking the time you saw it was 4, you spent the next few hours obsessing over what to say. No matter what you were determined to tell him your feelings for him. You were debating whether or not you should kiss him. Would he even want you back? What if he only sees you as a friend now? The hours whiled away and you took a deep breath before setting out.

You’d been to Steve’s apartment only once before, you knew he lived alone but he’d managed to make the place feel homey. You were buzzed in and before you had the chance to knock on the door Steve had it open and was waiting for you. His smile was all teeth and it was contagious, you smiled back looking up at him and he let you in.

You sat down on the couch and waited for Steve. No turning back now. Deep breath. He sat down and turned to face you.

“What did you want to talk about?”

No words were coming to you. Your mouth opened but you could only sputter. Oh God, where were the words? Do something!

So you did. Before you could think about it you put a shaky hand up to Steve’s jaw and pulled him in for a kiss. You didn’t know what you were feeling, you were just waiting for Steve to respond. You began to pull back but before you could he took your face in his hands and kissed you back tenderly but with purpose. Your arms were around him and he pulled you closer into his lap to kiss you more passionately.

You finally pulled apart to catch your breath. You snuck a look up to his face and you were nervous but you felt like you were floating.

“You have… no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that” He said between breaths.

You two smiled like idiots and he brought his lips to yours again. The kiss deepened and a moan slipped from your mouth. This seemed to spark something in Steve and his hands shakily moved over your body. He was feeling every curve of you and you ground down into his lap and his hips bucked up in response. You have no idea where this confidence came from but you’d never felt more sure of yourself. You broke apart again and Steve was breathing heavily.

“Is this what you want?” He asked. You could only nod before he was on you again. He pulled you up from the couch and led you to his bed. This time he laid you back and was hovering over you, slowly undoing the buttons of your jeans. You helped him get yourself out of them and pulled your shirt over your head, leaving you in just your bra and panties. How was this happening? Who cares?

He sat back and took the sight of you in, he was looking at you like you were the most precious thing. He slowly removed his clothes and moved back over you, kissing his way up your thighs before pulling your panties down your legs. He continued laving away at your skin, making you nervous but excited. His fingers brushed your core and he brought them up to his face.

“Sweetheart, you are dripping.” Your cheeks heated instantly as he chuckled. Not giving you the chance to respond he dove right in. Two fingers entered you and you arched your back, his tongue lapped up your wetness and then at your clit. You’d really never known pleasure like this, no one had ever done this for you before. His fingers pumped in and out of you and your hands flew to his hair and pulled. He continued on and curved his fingers just slightly and you clenched down around him, you were so close.

“Please, I’m so close” you whimpered.

Steve doubled his efforts and before you knew it the tension he had been building up was released in a white hot flash of ecstasy. You writhed against his fingers as he kept pumping them into you. Finally he relented, pulling them out and licking them clean. You’d never seen something that made you feel so filthy but so so good.

He took off his boxers and encased you in his arms. He kissed your neck and you moaned again at the feeling. You spread yourself for him and he lined himself up and groaned. The stretch was something you weren’t ready for. It burned almost, you cried out as he put his whole length in you. He waited all of two seconds before he began thrusting into you. You weren’t ready but you were adjusting quickly with the way his cock hit that spot inside of you over and over.

You were holding onto his shoulders, nails digging in deep as he started to go harder and faster.

“I’m close” He panted into your ear.

Reaching down his fingers found your clit and started moving back and forth quickly, trying to match his thrusts. The tension was building again to a breaking point and you were getting close again. He worked you even harder until you broke, cumming for a second time. Your eyes were screwed shut in ecstasy as you cried again.

“Steve!”

That was all it took before he slammed into you a final time, you could feel his release and you’d never felt closer to him. His movements stopped and your noses touched. He kissed you hard before rolling off of you.

“That was… oh my god” you breathed.

“I know, me too” Steve chuckled. “So can I take you to dinner?”

“Nothing would make me happier,” You grinned wide and nodded.

You cleaned yourself up and redressed. You were taking in Steve’s room and found yourself smiling at the photos of him and Bucky, little knick-knacks on his dresser. You found a sticky note on the calendar at his desk. You squinted. Had you seen his handwriting before?

You shrugged and flopped yourself back on the bed. You checked the weather on your phone and frowned at the temperature, you let out a small groan.

“What is it?” Steve called from the bathroom as he cleaned up.

“It’s so coooold and I forgot my jacket” You pouted.

“Just take mine, it’s the brown leather one hanging in the living room” He was so sweet.

Gingerly, you made your way into the living room and found the jacket, slipping it on. You don’t know what was taking Steve so long but you shoved your hands in the pockets and waited for him. You felt something in the right pocket. Is this trash? You pulled out little wadded up pieces of paper and unfolded them.

They were parking stubs. They were from the same structure that Sean had fallen from. Your heart was pounding, upset just thinking of him. Looking closer one of them was stamped for 2:15 AM, 2/1, the night that he died. Okay...

1 AM 1/15, 11:57PM 1/28, They matched the timestamp on the photos that had been sent to you. Two others were from nights when Sean had games and had stayed out late. Your heart was in your throat and tears were forming in your eyes, trying to find some explanation. You thought again of the first time you’d received an envelope, those photos, that note. It had dawned on you why the note looked so familiar… The handwriting! Oh, God... Your whole world slowed down as you heard footsteps bound into the room. Slowly you turned, the stubs still in your shaking hands.

“Oh, Sweetheart,” Steve took a step further, “You weren’t supposed to see those.”

#dark!steve rogers x reader #dark!steve rogers #college AU #librarian AU #steve rogers x reader #marvel x reader #dark!marvel #stalker!steve rogers #smut #angst #dark fic #dark marvel fics #dark mcu #twoyearsofdark

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heliads · 3 years

Text

Deserve You

Based on this request: “Bucky imagine where you're dating but you're not an avenger, so you sometimes feel not good at all for him even though he loves you more than anything. one time he comes from a mission to you waiting in his room, doubting again but he immediately tries getting this thought out of you and gives you his dog tags to prove he's yours forever and it's all cute then? :)”

masterlist

You open your eyes gradually, the last remnants of sleep being dragged away by the brightness of dawn. You allow yourself one final moment of lingering silence before sitting up with a yawn. A brief spurt of panic flashes across you when you realize that you’re alone in your bed, but then you hear a quiet noise from the kitchen and your pulse begins to settle once more. Bucky must have already gotten up, there’s no need to worry.

You keep having moments like this, where you turn to find yourself alone and keep thinking that this is it, that he’s finally left you. Then you mentally chide yourself for thinking that way- every single one of the Avengers that you’ve met on your trips to the old Stark Tower keeps talking about how Bucky’s head over heels for you, so why would he ghost you out of nowhere? You always smile for a second, thinking about your boyfriend, and then the doubt creeps back in and you glance around to find him. Every single time, without fail, those lurking remnants of doubt always worm back into your mind, and sometimes it feels like there’s nothing you can do to get rid of them.

The only available option is to find Bucky and put your mind at ease by knowing that he’s still here. So, you slide your legs out of the still-warm blankets, grimacing at the shock of the cold air, and pad over to the kitchen. Sure enough, Bucky is holding a mug of some hot beverage, maybe coffee or tea, and staring out the window at the city below him. He does this, sometimes, just watches the city like he could do it for hours. You have a feeling that he’s studying the city for any last lingering resemblance to the New York he’d grown up in, when the most pressing news was World War II and he didn’t see himself in Siberia for anything more than a ski trip, if he could put together enough pennies to afford it. However, life has a way of throwing you for a loop, and all of Bucky’s plans for the future evaporated as soon as he plummeted from the train all those years ago.

Bucky turns when he hears you approach. “Good morning.” You smile, joining him by the window. “Good morning yourself. Are you up early for an assignment or because of a nightmare?” Bucky frowns. “The latter. Did I wake you? I thought I was quiet.” You shake your head. “No, I was asleep the whole time. I just knew because you have that same look on your face after you have your nightmares.” Bucky laughs quietly. “And here I thought I was supposed to be the spy who knew everything. Sure you don’t want a job at S.H.I.E.L.D.?”

You raise your eyebrows. “I’m not sure that paying attention to my boyfriend really qualifies me for FBI: Avengers Edition, but I’ll keep it in mind.” You head over to the fridge, starting to pull out some items for breakfast. Bucky leaves within a few minutes, mumbling something about an early morning meeting, and you head to work yourself soon after. Your own workplace is no Avengers Tower, just a typical office building, and you slide into your seat just in time to start the day.

The morning itself is fairly uneventful, and you’re just starting to think that it’s going to be another boring day as usual when you head off to your lunch break. As you’re waiting in line to use the microwave, you hear a pair of women talking at a table near you. You had no intention of eavesdropping, but although their voices are fairly loud your attention was hooked from the beginning when you realize they’re talking about Bucky. More specifically, they’re talking about Bucky’s girlfriend, or lack thereof.

Ever since you started dating Bucky, he had been careful to keep you out of the public eye. When you work as an Avenger for long enough, you learn to keep everyone important to you out of focus, out of danger. If a HYDRA agent got word of the former Winter Soldier’s girlfriend, you’d be on a train to Siberia with handcuffs and a blindfold within the hour, a ransom request already placed on your head. That’s if they were patient- if not, they would just shoot you to send a message. By making sure nobody heard about you, Bucky could keep you safe.

The downside of this is times like now, when you have to listen to two of your coworkers discussing how strange it is that a man as attractive as James Barnes would still be single. Obviously, you can’t say anything, and you’re not sure that they’d believe you if you tried, but it’s still slightly uncomfortable to hear the conversation swirling around you even as you have to stay silent.

One of the women clicks her tongue in confusion. “I mean, isn’t it weird, though? He’s a friend of Tony Stark, there’s no doubt he’d have a shortage of girls who’d be willing to go out to a bar or something on a weekend.” The other woman laughs. “I bet that surplus of girls includes you, right?” The first woman grins cheekily. “I wouldn’t say no if he asked, but even I don’t have a chance. I mean, he’s an Avenger, and one of the hottest ones there. No one here could hold a candle to him. He saves lives on a daily basis and what do we do, sit around all the time? The only woman I could see him with is an agent or maybe Black Widow. At least then he’d be dating someone who’s his equal.”

The words feel like shards of ice threading through your heart, and you turn to go back to your desk, hunger suddenly forgotten. As you stare at your work, though, you find you can’t concentrate. You keep hearing what the women had said, that no one in this miserable office could be worthy of dating the famous Avenger Bucky Barnes. They’re right, aren’t they? Bucky was saving lives all the time while you complained and acted so needy. You sigh to yourself, feeling your spirits dampen by the second. Why did Bucky see in you anyway?

Bucky’s shoulders feel like they’ve been carved from stone. He’s been tense for so long that he’s certain he’ll never be able to move again. Today is the day that he has to begin reviewing case files from his time as a Winter Soldier. He’ll have to come face to face with photo and video evidence of all the wrongs he’s done, of all the killings and blood shed by his own damaged hands. He’s been trying to avoid it for a while, but S.H.I.E.L.D. needs his input on all of the past Winter Soldier missions in order to proceed with the ongoing investigations into the last HYDRA strongholds. Bucky has no choice but to confront his past, he knows that, but it doesn’t make his job any easier.

It’s not like he’s alone, though. Natasha is here, because her experience with the Red Room could prove useful with putting together some pieces of the HYDRA-Siberia-Soviet puzzle that’s been plaguing them for some time now. Steve is also here, one door down, looking at his old medical files that detail exactly how some brilliant scientists turned a scrawny kid with a death wish when it came to standing up to bullies into the strongest man of the century.

Bucky clenches his jaw, and turns back to the manila file folder in his hand. He flips it open, taking out the diagrams and security camera stills and laying them out onto the table before him as he reads. He’s flipping through the rest of the contents of the folder when he pauses, staring at the images awaiting his acknowledgement. Natasha sees him freeze slightly and glances over to see what’s troubling him. Her brow dips in understanding.

Lying before him are photo after photo of death and destruction. Bucky remembers this day now, after it was buried so long under HYDRA mind wipes and his own crippling want to forget. The bodies of the dead line a small street, buildings reduced to rubble. He can see the dead, so many of them. There aren’t just the few military commanders he was sent to exterminate- no, HYDRA wants no witnesses and so Bucky had killed everyone in sight. There are children in pools of blood, their mothers reaching over them as if to shield them from the inevitable bullets coming their way. He tells himself that their deaths were quick, efficient, maybe even painless, but it is not enough. There is no way to justify this amount of bloodshed.

Natasha puts her hand on his shoulder. The gesture, meant to bring comfort, startles him and it takes all of Bucky’s self-control to not flinch. Bucky swallows hard. “I did all of this. I killed every one of them.” Natasha’s voice is low and quiet. “It wasn’t you. You had no choice in any of this.” Bucky laughs, thought it is heavy with horror and breaks in upon itself. “It’s easier to say that, but it was still my hand pulling the trigger.” He leans back against the wall, trying to steady himself.

“How were you and Steve able to convince anyone to trust me? Why did you even want to save me in the first place?” Natasha stares at the photos, taking in the broken bodies of the dead. “Steve knew the real you, the one who’s standing here right now and would never attempt this sort of carnage. I knew what it was like to lose all control and feel like your hands would always be stained with blood. Second chances are more powerful than you might think.”

Bucky shakes his head slowly. “I don’t deserve that chance. I don’t deserve any of this.” He closes his eyes for just a second as if by blocking out the world he can block out the memory of the methodical shudder of the rifle in his hands, the recoil as he fired again and again. “I don’t deserve Y/N. She-” Natasha cuts him off smoothly. “Y/N knows what you’ve been through, and she knows that you are not that same man. I’ve spoken with her before, and she knows the full extent of what you did.”

Bucky’s eyes cut back to the photographs. “Then why does she stay?” Natasha’s gaze feels like a leaden weight, unflinching and unyielding. “She stays because she loves you. She stays because she knows that the real Bucky Barnes is a hero, someone who is willing and able to move on from their past. Y/N is one of the most important parts of your life, not because she’s a good kisser but because she’s one of the only people who can see straight through you and know that you’re a good man.”

Bucky nods. “I don’t need you to tell me twice.” Natasha’s right, though, and even the barest mention of Y/N brings back a wave of good memories to fight against the bad. She’s like an anchor, someone holding him in place even when all of the darkness he’s had to endure threatens to pull him under. It astonishes him sometimes that he still wakes up beside her every morning. She’s so perfect, so wonderful. What does Y/N see in him anyway that would make him so lucky to have her with him?

You’re in a despondent mood for the rest of the day. You slump home, not even bothering to turn on the lights but discarding your coat and bag in the dark of the room. The faint light still shining through the windows is all you’ll need. You stare unthinkingly at the apartment for a while, then head to your bedroom. As you catch sight of yourself in the mirror, you stop with a sigh, leaning your hands against the dresser underneath.

You stare at yourself, at the dark circles under your eyes. Who are you, anyway? Who are you to think that you would ever be good enough for an Avenger? At this point, it’s only a matter of days before he breaks up with you. No wonder he keeps waking up before you- he’s trying to leave without seeing you that often, as a way to lessen the blow of the eventual goodbye.

The problem about gloomy thoughts is that they tend to wrap around you, pulling you away from everything else. You’re so distracted that you don’t hear the front door open, and you don’t notice Bucky enter the apartment until he knocks softly on the wall of your bedroom as he stands in the open door. You turn around with a flash, plastering on a smile, but your reaction is too late and his brow furrows. “Are you alright?”

You try for a smile, reaching out to kiss him in greeting. “Of course I am. How was your day?” Bucky is not to be deterred. “I saw your face, Y/N. You looked really upset. Is everything okay?” Maybe it’s that velvet tone of his, or the concern laced in his eyes, but your few fragile defenses break down. You turn to him, fighting back tears. “Why are you still with me?” Bucky frowns. “What?” You hold your hands up uselessly. “You’re an Avenger and you’re out there saving lives all the time. Why would you ever be interested in some girl from the city? I’m not half the person you are.”

Bucky stares at you for a second, then wraps his arms around you, drawing you close. “Y/N, love, why would you ever think that?” You look away. “Because it’s true. You should be dating some other superhero of a woman who could be your equal.” Bucky’s frown tinges slightly with anger. “Did you hear about this on some news show? I told that one news outlet that if they said a single thing about me I’d shut them down, and I’ll do it-” You cut him off. “It’s not like that. It’s just- You’re an Avenger, Bucky, and you deserve someone equally as brave as you are.”

Bucky guides you gently over to the bed, and the two of you sit down on the edge. He pulls you into his arms. “I don’t want some superhero. I want you. Y/N, I love you because you’re the only one here who sees me for who I really am, not just some soulless Avenger but a faulty person. Honestly, if anything I’m surprised that you’d still stay with me.” Your tears dry up as you stare at him. “What?” A quiet smile spreads across Bucky’s lips. “Every single day, I come home and you make a difficult day a thousand times better. You know me better than I know myself, and even despite everything I’ve done and the monster I’ve been, you still make me feel like a good man again. You’re one of the kindest souls I’ve ever met, Y/N, and you deserve someone equally as good as you are.”

You shake your head slowly. “That’s not the same. Anyone can be nice.” Bucky cups your cheek in his hand. “Nobody else knows that I always get up in the mornings and pace around because of the nightmares. Nobody else knows that I always stare down the alleyways on the walk home because I keep thinking I’ll see Steve in there getting beat up, or help me pick out jackets based on how easy it will be to remove the left sleeve. You’re the only one for me, doll, and I wouldn’t trade you for a heartbeat.”

He reaches into a pocket. “Here, I’ll prove it.” He takes out something silvery, like stamped metal. With a jolt, you realize they’re his dog tags, the ones he had from fighting in World War II all those years ago. He gestures for you to turn around and you do, feeling the weight of the metal around your throat as he fastens them. When you look back at him, he’s smiling. “See? You can’t get rid of me, love. Not in a million years.”

You smile, running your fingers over the faded lettering. “Won’t you want them? You know, as a memory of your old life?” Bucky shakes his head, a content expression lingering in his eyes. “I don’t need them to remember. I’ve got you, and you’re the only home I’ll ever need.” When he kisses you again, you can feel the dog tags right over your heart, like a promise that he’ll always be with you, no matter what.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes imagines #bucky barnes x reader #winter soldier #winter soldier imagines #winter soldier x reader #avengers #avengers imagines #avengers x reader #tfatws #tfatws imagines #tfatws x reader #catws #catws imagines

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gxldenflower · 3 years

Text

Nothing I’ve Ever Known (Zemo x Reader)

The biggest issue you’d come across was Sam and Bucky. They were the closest thing you had to family (besides Helmut) and they made it very clear that they still hated his guts.

You were incredibly conflicted. On one hand, it felt wrong to not share with them that you were dating Helmut. On the other, you knew that they would never see you in the same light again.

But, life went on. You met up and went on missions with Sam and Bucky, drank wine with Helmut late into the night, and did your best to keep the two worlds separate.

Warnings: Mild angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, swearing, alcohol, very very brief and minor allusions to sex, me throwing canon out the window Because Fanfiction

Word Count: 1,203

A/N: Based off of this request. I kinda took it in a different direction, but I hope you like it! But if I'm being totally honest, this oneshot is kind of a mess. There's a lot going on, but I like it (kinda). Anyway, I hope y'all enjoy the Zemo fluff!

Gender Neutral Reader

“You smile in your sleep sometimes.”

“Hm?” You turn from your back onto your side to face Helmut, whose eyes are still heavy from sleep.

“I’ve noticed that you smile while asleep,” he repeats quietly. You hum, lips turning upward.

“So you watch me sleep, then,” you ask Helmut playfully, rolling over so you lay on top of him, chest pressing against chest. His hand immediately comes to rest on the small of your back. He chuckles, and you can feel his chest vibrate.

“Sometimes,” he admits. “You’re a beauty that I doubt I’ll ever get used to.” Helmut’s compliment makes your face heat up, and you smile involuntarily.

“You’re just sweet-talking me to get me to stay in bed, aren’t you?” You ask him, still grinning.

“Possibly.”

***

You didn’t mean to fall for Helmut. Truly. It was supposed to be a one-and-done deal. As soon as you, Sam, and Bucky finished your mission, you’d part ways, never to see each other again. Until you started to bond with Helmut.

While Sam and Bucky left him to deal with other issues (they kept an eye on him, of course) you stayed in consistent contact with him. It was wrong, to casually get drinks with the man who broke up the Avengers, but you couldn’t help yourself.

You weren’t quite sure when you and Helmut became more than allies or friends. Sure, you had spent that night together, but you figured that it was just a one-time thing. Until it turned into multiple nights spent together in your tiny apartment that Helmut was always critiquing.

It was nice; what you had with Helmut. When you spent your days and nights with him, it felt like you were the only people on Earth. He treated you like royalty, offering lavish clothing, jewelry, and trips around the world to places you never even dreamed of visiting.

The biggest issue you’d come across was Sam and Bucky. They were the closest thing you had to family (besides Helmut) and they made it very clear that they still hated his guts.

You were incredibly conflicted. On one hand, it felt wrong to not share with them that you were dating Helmut. On the other, you knew that they would never see you in the same light again.

But, life went on. You met up and went on missions with Sam and Bucky, drank wine with Helmut late into the night, and did your best to keep the two worlds separate.

You were managing it well until Helmut made the mistake of leaving that damn coat behind after he’d left your apartment.

The coat was incredibly recognizable. When you first met Helmut you made a snide comment about how it made him look like a pimp. You still teased him about it once in a blue moon, just to rile him up.

Sam had come over one day to drop off some old SHIELD files that could possibly help you track down some ex-HYDRA agents. Everything had gone as it always had. You made small talk with him and talked about plans for the next mission. Until he looked behind you at your worn, leather couch, where Helmut’s coat lay.

Sam recognized it immediately. “You have Zemo over recently?” He asked you, voice low. You turned around to see what he was staring at. When you realized what it was, you felt your heart drop to the pit of your stomach.

“Um.” You don’t know what to say. You’re a terrible liar, and Sam would see right through whatever thinly veiled lie you came up with.

“We were discussing a mission,” you say uncertainly, and you internally cringe at your half-assed lie.

“Right,” Sam replies, 100% unconvinced.

“Look, Sam. I know it looks b-” He cuts you off before you get the chance to try and explain.

“I don’t care who you’re sleeping with or seeing,” Sam tells you honestly. You refuse to look him in the eye. “It’s none of my business, so we’ll just leave it at that.” You hadn’t expected such a calm answer. You’d thought that he would storm off, calling you a traitor. Maybe that’s what he was currently thinking, but was just doing his best to hide his real thoughts.

You nod, finally looking up at him. “Yeah, I’ll see you and Buck next week,” you tell him slowly.

Sam nods back, squeezing your shoulder before heading out your apartment’s front door.

***

Helmut arrived at your home later that night, just as he’d planned. He didn’t need to knock; you’d given him a spare house key a while back. Helmut was the only person besides you to have a key. Sam and Bucky didn’t even have one.

“My love?” Helmut calls out to you. You hear his heavy footsteps as he makes his way through your living room.

“In the kitchen,” you reply. You’d taken a seat atop your counter as you waited for a pot of water to boil. You wanted to make chicken alfredo for you and Helmut. While it was nowhere near the kinds of food you ate when you went out on dates that Helmut always paid for, you figured it would be acceptable enough to eat.

You place your phone down next to you as Helmut walks into your kitchen. “I missed you,” he confesses as he goes to stand in front of where you sit. You immediately wrap your arms around his neck, leaning down slightly so you can bury your face in the crook of his neck.

Helmut reciprocates the hug, wrapping his arms around your waist and holding you tightly.

“Sam saw your coat you left here earlier today,” you mumble into his skin. Helmut hums in response.

“I’m assuming that means he knows we’re together?” He says softly.

“Yeah,” you whisper to him. Helmut pulls back so he can look at you properly. He gently cups your face with one hand.

“Are you alright?” Helmut asks you.

“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s none of his business anyway,” you try and reassure him. Helmut hums in response, not quite believing you, but not wanting to push you to talk about it just yet.

You bury your face back into the crook of Helmut’s neck, breathing in the scent of his expensive cologne. “I love you,” you mumble to him.

“And I you,” Helmut responds. You could stay that way in Helmut’s arm forever, but you suddenly remember the pot of water that you had on the stove.

You glance over at it just as it starts to boil over.

“Shit!” You exclaim, quickly pulling yourself away from Helmut. You hop down from the counter and gently push him out of the way. You reach to turn off the stove carefully and move the pot onto a cool stovetop as Helmut watches, confused.

You turn to face him once the immediate crisis is resolved. “The water boiled over,” you say simply, pointing to the pot. Helmut nods, and the two of you stand in awkward silence for a moment.

“Do you wanna go out to eat?” You suggest, hoping he’d say yes because you no longer had it in you to cook something.

“That sounds lovely, darling.”

Zemo Taglist: @tkachuk-dubois

All of Marvel Taglist: @9zoria9 @kawaiiusagichansan @hawkmoony @romanoffbby @therookie @fl0ating (forgot that i had a marvel taglist lmao sorry y’all)

Add yourself to my taglist(s) here

#baron zemo #zemo #helmut zemo #zemo x reader #helmut zemo x reader #tfatws #marvel #tfatws x reader #tfatws imagine #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #zemo imagine #it's 1 am i should be in bed. but no. i'm here posting a fic #anyway go listen to nothing i've ever known by bryan adams #it slaps

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sambvcks · 3 years

Text

crawl home to her, b.b. x reader

chapter three // didn’t care much how long i lived

summary: bucky receives a lesson on modern music over cheap beers and freshly baked scones.

warnings: mentions of abuse, food, alcohol consumption, character death (sorry)

word count: 1.6k

author’s note: besties...how we feeling about today’s episode??? using this as a coping mechanism :)

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Your record collection was extensive and collecting an unhealthy layer of dust since you had inherited them from your grandmother. It didn’t take long to fish out a Best Of album from the vast shelves, handing over the sleeve to Bucky, who sat patiently on your forest green couch, as you fiddled with the turntable’s needle.

To busy himself, he read over the repertoire of songs listed on the back.

“Let’s Get It On?”

“Usually, a guy buys a girl dinner first, Bucky.” You took a cheeky swig of your beer with an eyebrow raise as he flushed at the insinuation. “We’ll start easy. If I Could Build My Whole World Around You. A criminally under-appreciated love song.”

A bouncy beat crackled through from the speakers as you settled into the couch beside him, tucking your legs beneath you. Today’s choice of pajama bottoms displayed little snowflakes across a navy background, despite the heat outside that still lingered into nighttime.

“I like it.” Bucky decided.

“Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell have so many amazing songs together. She might not sound like it on record, but she had a hard life. Abusive, cheating partners. Brain cancer that killed her young. Hard to know what anyone’s going through behind closed doors.”

I’d put so much love where there is sorrow, I’d put joy where there’s never been before.

“I really like it.”

Your apron still hung from your waist, the gentle tick of the kitchen timer in the shape of a grey cat sat by your side. A reminder of the scones you were whipping up when Bucky unexpectedly appeared on your doorstep. You didn’t question him or bring up the late hour. Simply ushered him in with a smile and a beer shoved into his gloved hand.

Bucky feels comfortable for the first time in a long time. Eyes focused, mind stagnant. Your perfume, woodsy and natural, lingers in the air and he has to take a long gulp of his drink just to occupy himself for just a second.

“I’m glad you like it. Though, I don’t know if I’ve ever met someone who doesn’t like Marvin Gaye. It’s like not liking Queen.”

“Queen?”

The timer rattled on the coffee table and the smell of vanilla and blueberries nipped at Bucky’s nose.

“Saved by the bell! I don’t have the time to berate you on not knowing about Queen.”

You bustled your way back into the kitchen, sliding oven mitts onto your hands as you inspected the oven with a professional certainty. The record out and into the next track as Bucky watched on, your shoulders swaying to the slow tempo. You were light on your feet as you plucked one tray from the heat and replaced it with another.

It was so easy for Bucky to imagine this world as his, with the soft swing of Motown as the soundtrack to your shared afternoons. In a different life, he would come home to your baking, ask how studying went as you swayed in the kitchen together. You would wash dishes next to one another, hips pressed close, and giggle when he would press his sudsy hands onto your cheeks. You would smear remnants of cake batter on his and he would let you feed him dessert from your fingers.

It wasn’t possible, he knew. Probably ever. You would be graduating school soon, off to be an important attorney and he would still just be your across the hallway neighbor who you sometimes shared desserts and pleasantries with. You would find out who he was eventually. Everyone did. You would leave. Everyone did.

You would simply be another in a long line of failed attempts by James Buchanan Barnes.

Still, he thought, we can have this one simple night. Where you don’t know who he is, and he can imagine that it lasts long after he retreats back to his apartment.

‘Heaven must have sent you from above.’ Crooned the lovesick singers on your record player.

As you returned to the living room with another beer and the promise of scones as soon as they cooled, Bucky could only think one thing.

He was definitely starting to like Marvin Gaye.

He was starting to like you, too.

When he returned back to his apartment, hours later with a pile of records you insisted he borrow in his arms and a belly full of blueberry scones, he fell into bed without a care in his mind. It was his first full night of sleep in ninety years.

Bucky started appearing on your doorstep more often.

Your number was now saved in his phone and was his most frequently used contact. You were his secret, though, something he didn’t even share with Dr. Raynor. No matter how many times she tried to get him to speak about his troubling lack of acquaintances.

You were the one thing in the world untouched by all the destruction waging a war between his ears, you were easy and simple and God, it had been a long time since anything had been simple. You didn’t mind that he was brooding and a little bit clueless, or his cheesy jokes and complaints about technology these days.

His record collection was quickly growing, though it was still nowhere near yours.

Most of all, he liked sitting in your apartment, at your kitchen counter or on that forest green sofa of yours. Sometimes, you would let him pick a record and tell him everything you could remember about it. Other times, you would read from your heavy law books and he’d pretend to understand the cases and terminology, head resting against the back of your couch, admiring how your brows would furrow in concentration. He’d tell you not to hunch over your book, but you’d insist you were fine, only to be complaining about your neck the next time he saw you.

“I wish I read more actual books, you know? It seems like all I know these days are case studies.”

The next visit he’d have a worn copy of one of his favorite books tucked under his arm. He’d read to you until you’d doze off to the stories of Bilbo Baggins and his team of dwarves, a blanket tucked up to your neck.

Every visit cemented yourself further and further into his identity, until his trips to the used bookstore down the block became weekly and his morning runs became longer as you pushed more and more baked goods his way. You’d kiss his cheek as you said your goodbyes, leaning against your doorframe as he disappeared into his apartment.

He was happy. Positively, unbelievably happy.

Two days before Bucky’s next scheduled visit, Steve died in his sleep.

Pneumonia, or something, Bucky didn’t really comprehend any of the newscast beyond the headline ‘CAPTAIN AMERICA DEAD’ flashing in bold letters across his television screen.

Sam called early that morning and Bucky just knew. He knew what was waiting for him on the other end of that call, so he shut his phone off and laid back on the hardwood floor of his living room, dead to the world.

He didn’t speak to anyone for a few days, not even bothering with his daily runs or grocery store trips. Your knocks at his door went unanswered, with no trace that you had even stood in the hallway waiting for him other than a batch of oatmeal raisin cookies on his doormat. The only appointment he kept was his therapy, where he stared out the window and counted down the minutes until he could leave. Each attempt on Dr. Raynor’s part to bring up Steve was shut down as quickly as it was brought up.

Finally, a week later, a pounding at the door woke him from a restless afternoon nap.

“Buck, I know you’re in there.”

Sam. Of course.

“These boxes are heavy, come on!”

Sam Wilson took up Bucky’s entire doorway with his broad shoulders, the boxes stacked in his arms taking up the rest. Bucky was quick to usher him in the door, eyeing yours across the hall. He knew one look at an Avenger on his stoop would finally connect the dots for you, and you’d never speak to the Winter Soldier again.

“Keep your voice down.” Bucky shoved the final box through the doorway before securing the lock in place.

Sam surveyed his barren living room, eyes flicking to the crumpled bedsheets gathered on the floor next to his sofa but didn’t linger for long.

“I was worried about you, man.”

It used to be ‘we’, but now it’s just Sam.

“Nothing to worry about.” Bucky pushed past him to his kitchen, collecting stray dishes he hadn’t bothered to move to the sink before then. He felt Sam’s careful gaze on him the entire time. He hated that. He hated how much Sam cared.

He mostly hated how much it reminded him of Steve.

“Found these boxes in Steve’s attic. Had your name on them so I thought you might want ‘em.”

Bucky swallowed hard, focused on scrubbing the dishes under water so hot it was turning the skin on his flesh hand a violent red.

“I know this is hard, Buck-”

The glass he had been rinsing shattered between his fingers and Sam took a step back as Bucky heaved in uneven breaths. There was a long silence between the two grieving men, neither able to fully understand the other. Sam would never feel Bucky’s ninety-year heartache, the abandonment and fear of the life ahead of him. Bucky would never understand the weight on Sam’s shoulders or his unease at the shield tucked under his bed at home.

“I just want to be alone.”

Sam could do nothing but respect his wish.

“Call if you need anything.” Were his departing words as he showed himself out.

Bucky got to work cleaning up the broken glass.

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#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x you #marvel imagine #tfatws imagine #tfatws

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favefandomimagines · 3 years

Text

The Worst Holiday (ace.)

Summary: Ace tries to whoo you on Valentine’s Day but forgets that you hate the holiday.

AN: hehe i’m back with more ace x reader

tags: @derekmorganscrocs @bookish-bucky @remmyswritings

You were starting your shift at The Claw, like it was any other day, until you walked out on to the main floor and saw the horrendous decorations. Pink, red and white paper hearts were littered all over the walls and flowers were placed on every table. No doubt Bess’ handy work.

Grimacing at the sight, you turned around and walked back into the kitchen. You hated Valentine’s Day. You thought it was a stupid holiday, invented by the candy companies and Hallmark. It was the worst holiday that had ever been invented.

Seeing the noticeable lack of a certain bus boy, caused your eyebrows to furrow. “Y/N! Just the girl I was looking for.” Ace announced, walking into the kitchen, hands behind his back.

You scanned him up and down with a suspicious look on your face. “You’re acting weird.” You said. “Well, I uh, I got you something.” He replied. That peaked your interest as you walked towards him, arms crossed over your chest.

Ace removed his hands from behind his back, to reveal a heart-shaped box of chocolates. “Happy Valentine’s Day.” Ace said.

You had feelings for Ace since sophomore year of high school but Laura Tandy was always his main interest. After you started working at The Claw, and Laura left him, Ace got a chance to get to know you better and he started falling for you.

He never was able to build up the courage to tell you but then Valentine’s Day rolled around and he thought it was perfect.

“Thanks, Ace, but I hate Valentine’s Day. It’s a holiday that has no meaning behind it.” You replied. “But I appreciate the gesture.” You added, placing a hand on his arm before leaving the kitchen.

Ace watched you walk away and instantly thought of what he could do next. What else could he do to show that he was serious. “Did she like the chocolates?” Bess asked, approaching the young man.

“No. Because she hates Valentine’s Day. I need to do something that has nothing to do with this stupid holiday and that’s more about her.” He answered.

“Well, what does she like?” Bess questioned. “Um, well she likes to sing. She’ll hum sometimes when she’s cleaning tables. She loves sunflowers, she told me once they remind her of trips to the Hamptons with her mom. And uh, she likes to bake.” Ace explained.

Bess found it heartwarming that Ace paid so much attention to you. In her experience, no one she ever dated paid that much attention to her favorite things.

“Let’s start with the singing. What’s her favorite song to sing?” She said. “Um, ‘Here Comes the Sun’ by The Beatles.” Ace answered. “Great. And I have a quarter. We’re slow right now, so go play it on the jukebox and ask her to dance.” Bess said. “Ask her to dance?” Ace questioned.

“Yes. Girls love that stuff.” Bess explained. Ace took the quarter from Bess’ hand and walked out of the kitchen.

He saw you standing at one of the high tables, filling the salt and pepper shakers. He walked over to the jukebox, his eyes still on you. Ace put the quarter in the machine and pressed the number for the song.

The beginning of the song started to play, causing you to start humming along. As you were filling up a salt shaker, you saw a hand extended towards you and looked up to find it belonged to Ace.

“Wanna dance?” He asked. A smile slowly crept its way to on your face as you took his hand. Ace led further out away from the table and placed a hand on your waist, the other still holding on to your hand.

The two of you swayed back and forth to the music as you hummed along to the song. “I knew you liked this song.” Ace spoke up. “Really?” You asked. “You hum it a lot and you’ve mentioned that it was your favorite song.” He answered.

You looked up at him, a look of complete adoration on your face. You noticed Ace was beginning to lean in, as were you until George’s booming voice split the two of you apart.

“This isn’t a dance hall. We have work to do.” She ordered You cleared your throat and looked down at your feet before looking up and giving Ace a bashful smile. “We should, uh, get back to work.” You stammered. “Yeah, yeah. We should.” He replied.

You then grabbed the containers of salt and pepper and walked back to the storage room to put them away.

Ace groaned at how quickly the moment was ruined. “How’d it go?” Bess asked, appearing out of nowhere. “George kind of ruined it.” Ace answered. “Then we go to the next part; sunflowers.” She said.

“You think that’ll work?” He asked. “Of course it will. You know how important her mom is to her after what happened with her dad. You remembering how much she loves sunflowers may seem like a small thing but to her it’ll probably mean so much more.” Bess explained.

Ace took a deep breath before nodding his head. “Okay. Okay, let’s do this.” He said.

Bess recruited Nick to help Ace get a bouquet of sunflowers and bring them to The Claw.

“Why did you need these?” Nick asked, approaching both Bess and Ace. “Ace is going to give them to Y/N.” Bess answered. “You’re into Y/N?” Nick questioned. “Yes, okay? I’m into Y/N. Now give me the flowers.” Ace said, taking the flowers from Nick’s hand.

You exited the kitchen with a tray full of ketchup bottles in your hand when you noticed Ace with the sunflowers.

“Sunflowers?” You questioned. “Uh, yes. These are for you.” Ace stammered, holding them out to you.

You set the tray down and carefully took the flowers. “How did you know I like sunflowers?” You asked. “You always talked about going to the Hamptons with your mom and how much you love sunflowers because of that. And I know you hate Valentine’s Day but I probably would have done this sooner if I wasn’t so nervous.” Ace explained.

“Nervous about what?” You asked. Ace paused for a moment, deciding if he wanted to tell you the truth or not. “I-I think I love you, Y/N. I know I have strong feelings for you and I have since you started working here.” He said.

You were taken aback by Ace’s sudden confession and you happy that your feelings weren’t unrequited. But you kept thinking about how quickly he’s gone back to Laura in the past and you weren’t sure if you could handle that kind of heart break.

“I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel the same way. I have for years but there’s just one problem.” You said. “What?” Ace asked. “Laura Tandy.” You answered. “You’ve gone back to her at the drop of a hat and I don’t think I can be the second option.” You added.

“Laura and I are done. I ended everything with her the second I realized how I felt about you. You’re amazing, Y/N and Laura is nothing but a distant memory.” He told you.

“Really?” You asked. “Yes, really.” Ace confirmed. You smiled at him as you took the sunflowers from his hands. “Then you can take me on a real date. But tomorrow, not on the worst holiday ever. Though maybe I have a new reason to like Valentine’s Day.” You said, before pressing a light kiss on his cheek.

“Can we get back to work now? Why am I even paying you people?” George demanded.

You smiled back at Ace as you walked back to your locker to put the flowers away.

“I told you it would work!” Bess cheered. “She’s right though, this holiday sucks.” Ace commented.

Though Ace was very new to the world of actual, real life dates, the two of you had an amazing time together. So much so, that everyday at work, George sprays you with a spray bottle because you and Ace can’t seem to get enough of each other.

#imagine #imagines #ace nancy drew x reader #nancy drew cw #ace nancy drew #ace imagine #ace #nancy drew imagine #nancy drew characters

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shedobewritingalittle · 3 years

Text

Liability

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Stark!Reader, platonic!Sam Wilson x Reader, platonic!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: The reader deals with the repercussions of Steve’s actions and death of the three people closest to her.

Rating: R

Word Count: 4k

Warnings: Mentions of suicide, mentions of death, feeling alone, depression, you know the vibes

Bucky and Sam had been put in charge of making sure Y/N Stark was okay. Steve had made them promise on his deathbed that they would look after her. Of course they had agreed, not wanting to argue with a dying man. Sam and Y/N were best friends and well, Bucky had nothing else to do and he wasn't going to disobey his best friend's wishes.

Things were okay for the first month after Steve died. Well, as okay as it could be all things considered.

Bucky and Sam moved into the townhouse that Y/N had shared with Steve to make sure she was okay. It was unspoken agreement between the three of them: they were going to move in since they didn't have any other place to go and Y/N had more than enough room. She had just lost her brother, her best friend, and the man she loves so they expected her to be barely holding on, to be extremely upset-but she seemed okay. Sure there was moments were she would suddenly start crying or days were she wouldn't come out of the room she had shared with Steve, but both men had expected this. Y/N was grieving after all.

Then she told them that she was going to stay upstate with her sister-in-law and niece. Y/N missed them and wanted to make sure they were doing okay. Sam and Bucky thought nothing of this-in fact, they were happy that she wanted to see them. Her face seemed to light up when talked about her upcoming trip and both men thought that being away from the city and with her family would greatly benefit her.

Y/N had given them both a hug the day she left, telling them that she would give them a call when she had arrived at Pepper's. Nothing had seemed amiss as they had helped her fill her trunk with bags.Sam had offer to drive her, but she had insisted that she can drive upstate by herself. Y/N had looked so happy, truly happy when she climbed into the car. She had given them a huge smile as she waved, pulling away from the curb. Both men had felt so relieved, thinking that this was the best thing for her. For the first time after Steve has died, they felt like a weight has been lifted off their shoulders.

Y/N called later in the day when she had arrived at Pepper's. She painted a vivid picture of how excited Pepper and Morgan were to see her, how good it felt to be around her family. Y/N had even said that her and Pepper talked about Tony, which Y/N had said made her feel a lot better, made her feel not so alone. Bucky and Sam were happy and content with her situation, making her promise she'd call again.

For the first couple of weeks, she did call. Y/N always had something to tell them too. Sometimes it was her and Morgan had spent the whole day swimming in the lake or her and Pepper attempted to make some vegan sourdough bread. Y/N always sounded happy over the phone, which made Bucky and Sam think that things were looking up, that she was getting better.

And then the calls stopped.

The calls stopping wasn't an immediate cause for concern. Bucky didn't believe that Y/N, -as a grown woman-needed to check in with them every single day or every single week. Sam wasn't as so optimistic. He knew Y/N and he knew that she kept her promises. Even if she had gotten busy or was doing really good, she would have at least sent them a text. It wasn't like her to go completely dark on them. But he also know it wasn't his place to force Y/N to check in. After all, she was an adult.

And then Rhodey had called.

Sam and Rhodey didn't call each other a lot so when his name popped up on Sam's phone, the Falcon knew that this situation was serious. Sam wished for the best, hoped that Rhodey was just calling about a mission or something have to do with the government.

He wasn't so lucky.

"Hey is everything okay with Y/N? She hasn't been answering her phone." Rhodey questioned, immediately making Sam's stomach drop.

"She's upstate with Pepper. She left a month ago. I thought you knew that." Sam replied, which quickly got Bucky's attention. Bucky stood up a little straighter, his eyebrows knitting together.

"Sam, I'm upstate with Pepper and she hasn't seen Y/N since Steve's funeral." Rhodey quickly responded, following by a sigh and some muttered curse words. Sam felt sick to his stomach, bile rising up in his throat.

Rhodey explained that Y/N had been calling Pepper every day, but the calls stopped a few weeks ago. Rhodey had tried to tell her that Y/N was probably just busy, but Pepper knew something was wrong. So Rhodey had called, trying to ease Pepper's worries. Sam told him that Y/N had said she was going up to go see Pepper and Morgan. Her calls to him having stopped around the same time as her calls to Pepper did.

Y/N Stark had just vanished into thin air.

Sam knew they had to work backwards in order to find out some idea of where she was and that had led them to the closed door leading into Y/N's room. Neither of them had been on the other side of the door. It wasn't their place to go into her room, their room. Yet, seeing that no one knew where Y/N was, they didn't have much of choice.

Bucky and Sam didn't know what to expect when they walked through the white door, but they didn't expect everything to seem so...neat. Everything seemed perfect. The bed was made, clothes were neatly put away. One thing that did seem weird is that all of the pictures in the room were all laying picture side face down on the surfaces they were on. Pictures that were hanging on the walls were covered with a multitude of things-a t-shirt, a pillowcase, or a scarf. While it wasn't an immediate cause for concern, it did make both men feel incredibly uneasy. The pictures aside, everything looked normal and incredibly clean. Not a thing was out of place.

Other than her cell phone, resting on the dresser. The same phone that had been calling both Pepper and Sam.

There's one thing that remains completely consistent with the Starks and that's the fact they are both incredibly smart.

Y/N Stark had been on the run with Steve, Sam, Nat, and Wanda. She was good at hiding, amazing at it. Y/N knew that her phone could be tracked and that they would be able to see what location she was calling from. While Sam wanted to just give her the benefit of the doubt and just pretend she was hiding out on a resort somewhere, he knows better. The fact that she had created a system to talk to both Sam and Pepper using prerecorded responses hinted at something much darker-something that he tried not to think about.

After some digging and pulling some strings, Rhodey and Sam find security camera footage of Y/N buying four different bouquets. They're able to follow her car via the footage to three different cemeteries. Upon visiting each one, the three men find that she had left flowers for her parents, Tony, Natasha, and Steve. Using the time stamps on the videos, they learn that she spent almost an hour at each cemetery, with the last one being the cemetery where Steve was buried. After that, the trail went cold and they were back at square one.

Then her car was found by Rhodey, exactly halfway between the city and Pepper's home, hidden on an old stretch of road.

Every piece of luggage was perfectly in its place, exactly where Bucky and Sam had helped her put it. Her shoes that she had been wearing had been left on the passenger seat, her wallet left behind in the glovebox with not a card out of place. There was no signs of a struggle. It just look like she pulled off the the side of the road for a minute. Y/N didn't want to be found and since she didn't want to be found, she had been smart. If someone had taken her, they would have been sloppy and messed up along the way. Not Y/N. She knew better.

The people that she had left behind were at a complete lost. They were all terrified, none of them wanting to think about what might have happened to Y/N or what she was capable of. She had lost three people incredibly close to her-her brother, her best friend, and the man she loves. People have lost a lot less and done a lot worse to others and themselves.

"Is there anywhere the two of them had? Any special place they'd go?" Sam asks Pepper once all of their leads dried up. The woman is clearly distraught, wringing her hands and her eyes rimmed with red. Rhodey hadn't wanted ask Pepper, but they were left with no other option. It doesn't take long for her to answer. She must've been thinking and thinking about where her sister-in-law has gone the couple of weeks they have been looking.

"There was this little farm house an hour outside of the city that Steve kept telling her that they were going to raise a family in. It-It has a big oak tree. You can't miss it." She answers, looking up at Sam and Bucky, "Please, please find her."

Pepper was right. They couldn't miss the house.

It was an aging colonial located in the middle of nowhere, with farmland and forest surrounding it. Its white siding was covered in moss in place, making it look more green than eggshell. The wrap around porch had been ripped off in places, leaving gaps. Some of the emerald green shutters have been torn off completely or were hanging by a single hinge. Most of the windows were broken and Sam was pretty sure it was leaning to the left a little. On the second story, an entire part of the roof has caved in. The best part of the entire place was giant oak tree. It was absolutely massive-probably the biggest that either man had seen. An old tire swing hung from one of the lower branches, the rope fraying but still somehow holding on.

Bucky and Sam glance at each other before getting out of the car and walking up the gravel driveway. It was eerily quiet and everything seemed to be at a standstill out here. The porch steps creaked and felt like it was going to collapse under their feet. The porch itself was warped, some planks missing completely. Sam sighed and carefully knocked on the door, really hoping for the best. There was no response, so he tried again. When there was no answer again, Sam reached for the door knob, finding it unlocked. The door creaked open loudly and both men were prepared to see the absolute worse waiting for them inside.

Yet when Sam and Bucky step inside the house, their eyes immediately land on her.

Y/N was nestled in a nook of one of the windows that still had glass in its panels, knees drawn up into her chest. Old, moldy, and decaying furniture from decades earlier still filled the home. Mementos of someone else's family and life left behind, as if the home's inhabitants had gotten up one day and never came back. Pictures still left in their frames, their photos weathered and abandoned, It reminded Bucky of home, of the life he was ripped away from and he understands why Steve had like the house so much. It was a house that was out of place and out of time, just like the Star Spangled Man With A Plan.

"I was hoping you guys just let me be." Y/N announces, not bothering to turn her head to look at the pair. She rests her head against the window, nails digging into her calves. She was wearing a dress that was once white and the men could see her skin was littered with cuts and bruises.

"We just wanted to make sure you were okay." Sam announces, taking a step forward. The warped wood floors creak under his weight, announcing his movement. Y/N chuckles humorlessly, her breath fogging up the dingy glass.

"He said that we were gonna buy this house. Told me that he was going to marry me and we were going to settle down. Told me that we were going to have a family together. Told me that he wanted a family. Told me that for five years." She tells them unprompted, eyes flicking down to look at her knees, "And he did want all of that. Just not with me. I was just a replacement for her."

Bucky and Sam don't know how to respond. They know that there's nothing they can do, no way that they can defend Steve for his actions. Neither of them were happy with the man abandoning his grieving girlfriend in order to live out a half-baked fantasy. Y/N knows this too, which is why she continues.

"I told him to go. I told him if that's what he wanted that he could go. Told him I was going to be okay. He had already made his mind up at that point. For some reason, I-I didn't think he'd actually leave." Her voice cracks, her cool facade crumbling. Her nails digging deep crescents into her legs, "Why-Why would he leave me? I just lost Nat and Tony and he left-"

Tears roll down her cheeks as she releases her grip on her legs, loosening her hold. Her lower lip quivers, unable to rein her emotions back in. The question wasn't for Bucky or Sam and honestly, Y/N doesn't even know who she is asking.

"My brother-My brother got his family and I-Steve kept telling me that we were going to get married and have a house full of kids." She forces the words out through the emotion, finally turning to look at Bucky and Sam, "Did you know that he and Peggy had three children together, Sam? I don't think he told you that when you got the shield."

Her eyes flick back down to look at her knees, tears rolling down her face. The house has gotten a lot colder, especially as the sky starts to darken outside. Y/N lifts her head, resting it against the frame of the window.

"I bought this house. It was going to be his Christmas present this year. A push in the right direction, if you will. Tony told me not to do it, said it was a bad idea. And he was right. He was always right." Y/N announces, a bitter laugh slipping out of her mouth, "And now I'm stuck with this fucking shithole."

For the past eight years, Y/N has been in a relationship with Steve. He was the man she loved, the man who she saw herself marrying and having children with. Y/N had turned on her brother and gone on the run with Steve, even though she knew that might cut off ties from the only family she has. When Thanos snapped his fingers and made half of the universe disappear, Y/N had clung to her boyfriend. Sure she'd go visit Tony, Pepper, and Morgan and would occasionally see Natasha, but she practically spent every waking moment with Steve. After the Snap, after she saw how happy her brother was, she knew she wanted a family. And Steve-Steve just kept telling her that they would have a family one day.

Y/N had been too distracted to see the cracks in their relationship. She was too in love with Steve to see that he hadn't loved her the same amount. Too in love to see that she was only a replacement for the woman he truly loved. When the cracks started to slip through, Y/N tried her best to fix them by making excuses. She had layered and layered excuses onto of each other in order to hold her relationship together. And while Y/N should've known better, she just didn't want to face the music and see everything for what it was.

That had worked until Natasha died, until her brother snapped his fingers. Until Steve told her that he was going to leave, not taking how she was feeling or what she was going through into consideration. Until he told her that he just didn't love her in that way. Until she had to keep how betrayed she felt to herself as she played the role of the dutiful, mournful girlfriend at his funeral. After that, everything came tumbling down around her and she was thrown back into reality.

"I told him.. told him that I wanted to end it all and he didn't care. Didn't even try to talk to me about it. Tony was the only family I've ever known and Nat was my best friend and he-he should've been there for me and he wasn't. He didn't care because he was already going to be gone. Another dead Stark didn't matter to him." Y/N turns her head and narrows her eyes at them, "That's why you two came here, isn't it? To make sure I didn't off myself?"

"We wanted to make sure you're safe-" Bucky starts, but Y/N quickly cuts him off with another bitter laugh. The super soldier glances at Sam, not knowing what to do in this situation.

"You wanted to? Don't bullshit me. You guys didn't move in with me or come to check on me because you two actually care about me. You two promised Steve that you'd watch over me, like I'm a fucking helpless child." Y/N snaps, glaring daggers at the two of them, "If he cared that much, he'd fucking be here, but he isn't. Steve made his choice and because of that, he doesn't get to have a say in my life anymore."

"Okay fine, we won't bullshit you. Yeah, he did ask us to take care of you, but you act like we weren't friends five years ago, Y/N. I have no idea what you're going through, but don't you dare act like I don't fucking care about you." Sam fires back, tears filling his eyes. More tears stream down her face as he continues, "Before the snap, you and me were thick as thieves. I care about you, Y/N, and you've had Pepper, Rhodey, and me all worried sick. Yeah, we were scared that you'd hurt yourself because we know you and I know how bad you got when we were in hiding, so we have every right to be worried about you."

It's incredibly quiet, quiet enough to hear a mouse sneeze. Bucky felt incredibly awkward standing there. He had only met Y/N a few times before he moved into her home and every time he had been around her, Steve was there. Obviously, he doesn't know Y/N as good as Sam does-hell, he barely knows anything about her-but he knows when someone is doing bad and Y/N is clearly doing bad.

Y/N leans her head forehead, pressing it against her knees for a moment. Her chest felt hollow, almost as if it was going to cave in on itself. She would love to pretend that she was doing completely okay, love to pretend that Sam and her family were wrong in their assumptions of why she had disappeared. Y/N would love to pretend like everything was okay, but she was tired. She was incredibly tired, utterly exhausted. Y/N was done trying to pretend like nothing was wrong, done hiding everything in order to keep up appearances for the people around her. She let a shakily breath slip out of her mouth as she lifts up her head, resting her chin on her knees. As if he could feel the energy in the room shift, Sam turns to look at Bucky, silently asking if he could leave. The super soldier nods and without a word, he walks out the front door, shutting it behind him. Sam knows Y/N and he knows for times like this, she doesn't need an audience. Its already extremely hard for her to share what she is feeling and having Bucky there isn't exactly helping.

"I can't do this anymore, Sam. I can't." Y/N admits quietly once the door is shut, tears steaming down her cheeks. "I tried to stick it out for Pepper and Morgan, but I can't. I-I was going to do it. I had a goodbye message recorded and everything."

Her confession sucks all of the air out of the room, the only noises being her sniffling and the sounds a house as old as this one makes. Sam can feel his heart breaking in his chest makes his way over to her, crossing the room in seconds. He moves to sit on the edge of the nook she's sitting on. Up close, Sam can see how red her eyes are, how dark her under eyes are. He knows she most likely hasn't gotten any actual rest in few days-most likely since she's been gone. Her legs and arms are all cut up and bruised, her white dress covered in dirt and occasionally some sprinkles of deep burgundy. Her cheeks seemed a little less full and Sam wonders when was the last time she ate was.

"And you wanted to do it here?" Sam asks, his voice soft. Y/N just nods in response, unable to look at him. The man clasps his hands together as he continues, treading the waters as carefully as possible, "I-I'm not going to pretend to understand what you're going through okay? I'm not going to bullshit you. All I know is that you're hurting and you have every right to be."

"It just hurts so much, Sam. Everything hurts and I-I don't want to hurt anymore." Y/N manages to get out, not bothering to wipe the tears that keep rolling down her cheeks, "I'm tired. I'm so God damn tired and I want to be with them."

"Do you think that's what Tony wants? Do you think he wants you to join him? Do you think that's what Nat wants you to do?" Sam questions delicately, to which Y/N shakes her 'no' in response, "I know it hurts, but ending it? They don't want that for you. We don't want that for you. You still have so much life to live, kid. And I know it's horrible right now. You're going through pain that is way too much for one person to carry, but you don't have to go through this alone. Sure I'm not Nat or your brother and I'm sure as hell not Steve-but I am here and I want to make sure you're okay."

Y/N raises her head to look at her friend and Sam can see the hurt written all over her face. Her pain is visible and he feels like a shitty friend for not noticing it beforehand. Sam carefully reaches out and rests his hand on top of hers, a tear slipping out of his eyes.

"Just come back with us, okay? It's not going to be easy and it's going to suck, but I can't bury another friend, Y/N." Sam's voice cracks, his throat constricting with emotion. It takes her moment-and for that moment Sam is absolutely petrified, wondering if he said all the wrong things, wondering if he made it all worse-but then she nods the world's tiniest nod before breaking out into full on sobs. It was like all of the pain and hurt had finally broken through and she was finally reacting to it all. Sam wrapped his arms around her tightly, holding her against his chest as she cried and cried over the family she lost.

#steve rogers x reader #sam wilson x reader #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers #sam wilson #bucky barnes

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cherryblossomtease · 3 years

Text

Chapter 15

18+ only

warnings and summary - Masterlist

Because sometimes all you need is a simple reminder of who started this mess in the first damn place 💜

Warnings : as always 18+ only please- dom Zemo, sub Bucky, sub reader, punishment, m/m, m/m/f, light bondage

Authors Notes: Really didn't think I would be posting this weekend but it's a holiday in the states so why not! Still working on the rest by you know, neglecting everything that matters to create this fictional world. Anyhow, I can honestly say this is by far the most graphic story I've written so I'm a little nervous but it's already done, can't change it now, and I honestly don't want to! That said I hope you enjoy reading as much as I did writing!

Nothing lasts forever, especially when it’s this good. And this fabricated reality is about as good as it gets. Still, you know this boat will dock soon and goodbyes will be said. There’s really no way around it, try as you might to come up with a plan to talk Bucky into staying. Even now as you fight to stay asleep, your brain is working hard to create a solution while you refuse to give into your worries so early in the day.

You turn onto your stomach ignoring the dark thoughts, choosing instead to enjoy the feel of a strong arm across your back and a leg, hairy and heavy over both of yours.

Settling again with a content sigh, sleep starts to pull you back under. Thank the stars. You really aren’t in the mood— even if your dreams apparently are.

And what had you been dreaming about anyway?

A little house on a wide cliff overlooking water, and something else? The harder you try to remember the more you feel yourself slipping back into that dream space.

There was a small animal. What was it? A rabbit? Its fluffy body too close to the edge of the cliff. But in the dream you’d stayed standing in the doorway of the little house too indifferent to go and save it….

You feel bodies moving lazily, a stream of breath along your back that tickles; arms and legs and the men they belong to not fully awake and starting to stir like you, even as you quickly slip back into sleep until you’re standing in the doorway of that house again with the warm winds on your face and a view of the French sea below. The drop is dangerous. Deadly even.

Why haven’t you started talking Bucky into staying yet? Because you don’t like thinking about it too much. That's why. You start walking towards the edge of the cliff and you’re fully aware of your worlds crossing over —real thoughts present in your dream.

It’s probably bad luck to resent good deeds, after all that’s what he’s leaving you for. He wants to go off and live the life of the hero he never got to be. That and to keep Zemo’s location safe; but that’s besides the point. Hmm… Look at me, selfish even in my dreams. You smile when you shouldn’t.

Staring over the edge of the cliff it’s suddenly clear how unstable the ground is here and you gasp as it crumbles beneath your feet without warning.

Your eyes open with a start.

Well, that was a bit on the nose. Your subconscious does like to lay it on a thick sometimes, especially when you continue to ignore the things bothering you for too long and you've been setting these feelings aside since the text came through.

But just as quickly as you’re left to shake the shadow of the eerie dream, your frown fades replaced by a slow smile.

There is a very familiar poking at your ass that can sometimes be annoying-- this morning it’s welcome. You reach back and feel for the body that the greeting belongs too, comforted by the warmth and solid muscle of Bucky’s thigh under his tight boxers.

Mmmmm, the source of my distress and my desire, you think and grin into the pillows with a soft moan when his hand, hot and strong takes hold of your hip, massaging as he presses his erection into you.

You’ll talk to him about your dreams later.

Feeling a draft where there should be warmth, you open an eye to find breaks of sunlight in the space between Helmut’s arm and torso. When you turn your head you’re met with the sight of his bare chest, broad and covered in the softest dark hair. His necklace hangs off center, and you, as always, are helpless to it.

Your hand leaves Bucky’s thigh and your fingers slide over the delicate links in the chain and down into the soft chest hair as you turn your head to find he and Bucky locked in one hell of a kiss for so early in the day. It must have been their movement or the sound of their lips that woke you and pulled you from the doom of your fatal fall.

Dreams are so strange…

Your heart flutters when Helmut lays his hand over yours pressing it tight to his chest. “Good morning love birds.” You snicker and watch Bucky pull away from Zemo looking a little embarrassed. He does pause to kiss your cheek however before getting out of bed with a long stretch.

“So where the hell are we anyway?” He asks going to the balcony door, looking out at the passing waves. “Feels like nowhere.”

Zemo is looking down at you, stroking your profile, kissing your nose. “We should be well within the middle of it actually.” He answers, eyes still fixed on you.

“Perfect” You say softly letting him pull you so close that he blocks out the light as your lips meet.

“Breakfast is ready sir,” Oeznik calls from outside the bedroom door.

Zemo grumbles at the interruption but you’re starving. “What? I’m not going anywhere” You huff turning away, trying to escape. “You just said so yourself. I've got no place to go.”

“All by design” He smiles and lets you get up, giving your ass a smack as you go. Bucky is watching from the doorway and laughs at your yelp-hop-rub combination.

Swearing under your breath you go over to the closet, grab your silk robe and pull it on over your shorts and tank top, yawning as you drag your feet over to Bucky. You pat his stomach, kissing him quickly. “Hungry?”

“Famished.”

“Lets go up.” You say tugging at him as Zemo gets up and puts on his own robe across the room. It’s not the thick one you liked from before the raft, but silk like yours— Tom Ford if memory serves— god his influence is strong. How the hell do you remember this stuff?

You watch him scratch at the back of his messy nest of hair like he always does in the mornings, somehow looking both sexy and adorable, alternating between the two with the ease of flicking a light switch. You can only smile at the enigma that is Helmut Zemo and pull Bucky away from the doors.

The three of you leave the room shuffling along, making your way down the hall to the den. Zemo trails you and Bucky accepting a small espresso from Oeznik as he watches the way you and your Sergeant interact. Neither you nor Bucky are necessarily morning people and though it’s nearly ten, you’re both somewhat irritable now that you’re actually moving around and slightly hungover from yesterdays sangrias as you make your way up to the top deck where breakfast will be served.

The sun is so bright you huff about not being able to find your sunglasses and Bucky accuses you of being a diva. The only appropriate reaction is to give him a shove.

Zemo snorts a laugh at your near sibling like banter which you’d established after so many months together, but once you find your glasses on the bar counter and get a fresh cup of coffee and a bloody Mary chaser in your body you’re feeling like a new woman ready to conquer the day… a day spent doing nothing really.

It’s all so casually decadent that it’s nearly sinful. Whats the one? The sin that doesn’t sound as good as lust but feels better after all that fornicating you’ve been doing— Sloth? Yes, you think reaching for what’s left of your blood Mary from the lounge chair, the ultimate of all the sins. Thou shalt not be a lazy ass sloth all day on your yacht.

Cheers.

You read on the deck for a while, play a few rounds of shuffle board with Bucky by the pool and attempt to best Zemo at chess in the den.

Lunch is wonderful, and you think you will need to meet this mystery chef at some point before the trip is over followed by a nap on the bedroom balcony.

When you wake up in the very late afternoon you venture down the hall with your book and unexpectedly find the men in your life moaning on the floor of the den in a tangle of beautifully tanned arms and legs. So you very quietly slip past, feeling a flush rise up your neck to your cheeks highlighting your wide but tight lipped smile.

You stay above decks giving them privacy feeling only the slightest twinge of jealousy. Not because you think you’ve been excluded but because you could use another session like last night.

A shiver runs deep in your belly thinking of the way Helmut brought you to climax, but you’re still more than happy to give them time alone. After all, you’ve had the Baron to yourself for far longer than Bucky.

You sink down onto the upper deck sofa, the image of them entwined, the sounds of their heavy breathing and Bucky’s near innocent moans enough to make you consider touching yourself but you wait, letting the urge build, one of them if not both will take care of you later.

So when Bucky comes up and finds you with a funny look on his face you’re completely confused. “Whats wrong?” You ask putting your book down.

He’s poured a drink and sits down beside you on the couch.

“I don’t know if I can do it.” He says shaking his head tossing back the bourbon.

“Do what?” You have an idea but you thought for sure he’d be eager to try, at least it looked like they were well on their way to his first time.

“Letting him control me, I’ve never had someone tell me no. Not like this.”

“Oh” You smile. It’s the no sex. The lack of it is a cruel form of control but the end results are glorious, if he could just be patient enough. “He won’t let you come?” You ask a little more patronizing than you’d intended.

“No!” Bucky whines taking his cue from you and you stifle your laughter. He’s so cute, even in the throws of his sexual agony. “And it’s making me crazy. I mean I’m already crazy but this is different.” He looks around and leans closer to you. “If you were to so much as look at my cock right now, I’d be done.” He says under his breath.

You let go and laugh rolling your eyes. Dramatics seem to come as naturally as submission to him. “That’s against the rules.” You warn eyeing him sidelong and attempting to go back to your book.

“I can’t take it. Fuck the rules.” He says again pulling the paperback from your hand.

You wave your finger in his face. “James. You’re not allowed.” You say playfully.

“Please.” He begs running his finger down your cheek, brushing your neck and gliding along your clavicle where he knows you’re sensitive.

“I can’t!” You lean away a little surprised by his attempt.

“He won’t know!”

You shake your head “I know but…” You try not to smile.

“I can’t take it.” He insists leaning in to kiss you. “I promise; it won’t take long.”

You give in and laugh sensing his desperation as you kiss. He does feel tense. The muscles of his arm and shoulder are wound tight as a chord. You smile against his lips letting him ease you down onto the couch, your book dropping to the floor as he moans, sliding his hand down your thigh, pushing your knee up and his own hips forward letting you feel what you’re fairly certain is the most rock solid hard on you’ve ever had pressed to your body. You whisper his name as his lips find their way to your neck and his hand slides between you to free himself from those amazing shorts.

“Shame, I had every intention of making your patience worth the effort. But you do love to prolong your torment, don’t you soldat.”

You gasp and Bucky hangs his head as Zemo comes sauntering over. Your laughter is a mix of nerves and feeling like you’ve been caught sneaking around with a boy like a damn teenager. It’s been years since you’ve felt a rush like this. Leave it to the Baron to stir that old excitement again.

“Don’t move” Zemo orders, pointing a finger in your face. You freeze, legs open where Bucky was, your arms tight at your sides. “Sit” He growls at Bucky who obeys begrudgingly as he slides back onto the couch.

Very quickly Zemo shoves your legs closed and grabs you by the arm pulling you up to standing. You lean away as he shakes his head keeping you close, his hold so tight you wince “I thought you knew better by now” He scolds you sounding disappointed.

“I told him not too?” You try looking as innocent as possible. You truly had no intentions of fucking him, but maybe a quick hand job?

There is a flicker of excitement in Zemo’s eyes. It's been so long since you’ve given him a reason to really go for it and you hold in your smile because you’re meant to be sad and hang your head. “I’m sorry Baron.”

He ignores your attempts to apologize and pulls you over so that you’re standing in front of Bucky. He looks you both over for a moment thinking and then smiles. You don’t know if you love or hate to see him looking so pleased. Nothing “good” ever comes of that smile.

“Look James.” He says, waiting until Bucky raises his head. “I want you to see what listening to your eager cock and not my rules get gets you— and her.” He tells Bucky before giving you his undivided attention.

Zemo turns your back to Bucky and you feel his hand between your shoulder blades pushing just a little. You bend at the waist, not all the way, just enough to make sure Bucky knows where his attention should be.

This flouncy little designer sun dress you’ve changed into after your nap only helps direct his gaze as Zemo drags the fabric up slowly so that the reveal of your ass is yet another way to torment him all on its own and you give yourself over to the Baron and wonder how bad this will be.

“Pull them down.” He tells you, his hand smoothing over your simple lace panties. His voice is not so angry as it was when he found the two of you, but every bit as firm, and you glance up at him as you hook your thumbs into the waist band. He nods and you quickly obey, pulling your underwear over the curve of your hips and ass and swear you hear Bucky groan when you bend to pull them from your ankles letting him see the diamond shape of your pussy from behind for just a second, your smile hidden from view.

When you stand again, Zemo offers his forearm. You rest your stomach against him, your hand gripping his shirt, the other you will have to try very hard not to cover your backside with because you know that the breeze will be the last nice thing that you feel.

He tosses your dress back up holding you, adjusting the way he stands just a little so that you are safe but immobile.

“Count them off; to five.” He says leaning just a bit closer. The tone in his voice is confident. Zemo knows that you’re well aware of what this means.

“Yes Baron.” You say exhaling, trying to prepare, but five? Fuck. He does not intend on holding back. If he was being playful he would give you ten or more, but five? He knows you won’t be able to take more that that.

You dig your fingers into his forearm and hold your breath.

The first strike makes you cry out.

The way Zemo can raise his hand and bring it down on your ass is unrivaled. He doesn’t mess around. There is no teasing, no playing, no cute little taps to warm you up. Just instant punishment.

“One.”

Your voice shakes and the rousing heat of adrenaline spreads through your arms and legs.

Again he lifts his hand and brings it down quickly with a stinging force that sends shock waves through your body. Your cry is weaker this time, trailing longer.

“Two.”

You pull his shirt tighter into your fist, your cheeks are on fire already when you feel the air stir as his hand rises again. You wonder if Bucky is watching, you wonder if he see’s how your thighs flex and your flesh shakes when the Baron strikes you.

You close your eyes and draw in your bottom lip trying not to moan, but you arch your back and your hips begin to circle ever so slightly with the anticipation of the next smack. You’re practically whimpering as you offer up your backside for more.

Zemo can feel the light vibration of pleasure sounding in your chest and his laughter is a low, very amused rumble as he raises his hand just a little higher this time.

The next smack lands and you toss your head back with a gasp. You would have gone to your knees if he wasn’t strong enough to hold you up. “Three” You whisper but you don’t move. The air brushes your pussy, wet in spite of your reddening skin.

“Don’t look away.” Zemo says.

There is the answer to your previous question. Bucky likes it, but it’s not always easy for him to watch.

“James!” Zemo snaps and waits. Bucky must be looking again because you feel the Baron move.

The fourth strike comes and you steady yourself knowing you can take it, wanting it, loving it as much as your feel your legs shaking. “Four”

You’re breathing hard, as you anticipate the final blow, desperate for it to be over but sorry for it to end. You rest against him for just a second feeling both safe in his hold and powerless to his dominance.

When the last of your punishment lands you hang your head, rounding your spine unable to offer yourself anymore. You can not pretend and this is why he’s given you so few.

Letting your hips drop as your body shudders and a single tear falls, you whisper, “Five” And only Helmut hears you say it.

Very gently he pulls your dress down, the soft cotton is cool over your burning skin and he turns you around to face him.

He brushes the tear from your cheek, holding you in such a way that you can go limp in his arms. “It wasn’t that bad, you’re just out of practice.” He says smiling at you knowing it wasn’t kind either.

You’d love for him to know just once. Maybe let Bucky give him a slap across the ass to make it fair. But when you look at him the thought is all wrong if not hilarious and you just shrug a little and hang your head again, resting on his chest.

“No breaking rules.” He scolds affectionately, “Even if you’re only trying to help. Understood?”

“Yes Baron.” Your voice is very small.

He gives a nod, kisses your forehead and looks over his shoulder at James. “So, is this what you wanted?”

“No.”

“No… no I don’t think it is.” He agrees. “But I understand. She’s damn near impossible to resist still you must learn to control yourself. Apparently I’ve not made that clear. Perhaps a more direct approach.”

You both look at him wide eyed. What’s more direct than this you think not even close to recovered from your spanking.

“Both of you, go down to our bedroom.” He says as though nothing has ever been more obvious “Take off your clothes. Wait for me on the bed.”

You look at Bucky. He looks at you.

“You fucked up,” You mouth to him.

Bucky just gets up and pushes past you both.

“I suppose you could say I’ve had to get creative with my plans for you. I know that pain is something you can’t respond to in ways that she can.” Zemo says, smiling as he glances down at Bucky and then over his shoulder at you on your knees behind him. “Have you finished?”

You look up from what you’re doing, hoping it’s right. “Yes, I think so?”

He comes around to look at the rope binding Bucky’s wrists. It’s just for show to heighten the experience. Of course Bucky could break free if he wanted to— his strength is no match for a few rough fibers— but this is a training of the mind as well as the body. “You see, pleasure can be just as awful.” Zemo says, his voice making you shiver as he checks your work, tugging and tightening the rope a little more.

Leaning in close, he strokes Bucky’s jaw, his finger reaching to trace the spine of his ear and you smile when the hairs on Bucky’s right arm raise and Zemo loses the air of control for a second simply becoming the man who cares for the other deeply. “The irony of tying you to a chair to satisfy you is not lost on me, based on what I know of your past. But if you can endure it, I promise it will be nothing like the pain you’ve known. I could never hurt you in that way. Still, if at any time this is too much, if it triggers memories that change it from what it’s meant to be, please— James— say the word, your word and it stops.”

Bucky nods. “I will” He says softly.

“Nothing now?” Zemo asks genuinely wanting to know. Bucky shakes his head. “No, nothing.”

Zemo gives a confident nod and kisses the back of Bucky’s head patting his cheek a little harder than he needs too. “I only want to make you feel good— eventually.” He teases and Bucky rolls his eyes with a small laugh.

Pleased, Zemo pushes up and goes to sit in the soft chair across the room, notably more comfortable than the one Bucky has been placed in. Although the more obvious differences being, Zemo is not bound, Zemo is not naked, and Zemo has not been so gently stroked and toyed with that he’s been left with a perfectly vulnerable erection like Bucky has.

You’d had a hard time focusing on the ropes as the Baron made it happen. The way he’d taken Bucky in hand, winding down the length of his sex was in a word, mesmerizing. And when Bucky made that sound, that soft, pleading sound and Zemo stopped — his brow raised with such smug confidence— you wondered who would break first, you or Bucky. He’d quickly brought his hand up with one last tease, his fingers swirling around the curving head of Bucky’s member only to let go as though he’d lost interest.

Bucky’s groan was deep. He was beyond frustrated, but instead of breaking out of his restrains and fucking one of the two of you, he sat there just waiting to be punished for breaking rules in the first place.

He watches as you come and kneel before him, naked yourself as you’ve been told to be. He actually looks slightly scared but mostly curious. His erection is as always flawlessly pretty, arching up and back, smooth while perfectly veined and so inciting.

You only know what it is you’re meant to do to him because you’ve had it done to you before. You figure it’s very similar, only the mechanics are different because his is a man. If Zemo doesn’t approve, he’ll tell you.

The Baron in charge picks up his drink, the ice rattling as he takes a sip and lets the scene settle in his sights for a moment. He likes to see the two of you together, his two helpless things— his to play with and his to love.

“Begin.”

Bucky inhales, but you smile at him to show that it won’t hurt— it’ll just drive him mad.

First you take the little bottle of body oil from the floor and put some in your hands rubbing them together.

He raises his brow watching you and starts to relax thinking he might understand now. You take him in hand and start to stroke, you are after all very good at this. Over and over again, up and down his long, thick shaft, curving your hand over the head of his cock until he moans and rolls his eyes shut. When he opens them he does seem a bit confused by this sudden attention and he flashes a smile because it feels so good. If this is all that’s been planned, he could get used to this sort of punishment.

The room is quiet, there’s nothing but the soft hum of the ship, his breathing and the wonderfully obscene sound of the oil you’re using against his skin as you work faster…

It’s not long before you feel him stiffen and his breath grows quicker, his thighs flex, his hips raise an inch and he starts to moan softly, a staccato sound of pleasure that makes even your heart beat faster. He’s been waiting and suffering through so much you can feel the joy of release seeping into every inch of his body.

“You feel it happening?” Zemo asks softly. “The start, the pressure mounting? You see, she is very good. And she will get you there James, every time— right to the edge”

You yank your hand away and he jerks forward mouth open cock twitching with the start of an orgasm he will not have.

“To the edge” Zemo chuckles. “A cruel punishment for a greedy man who must learn to wait.”

Bucky quickly lifts his head, the realization flashing in his eyes as his chest rises and falls. He looks down at you.

You smile and reach for him again.

“Please” He begs breathless.

“Not yet” Zemo says leaning forward a bit in his seat, the drink in his hand all but forgotten. You notice the ice has long since melted as you wait for permission, watching over your shoulder.

He gives you a nod and you turn back to Bucky.

Wrapping your hand around him again, you feel him so solid he’s like stone. His thighs are flexed, his hips raise up in the chair as you begin to jerk your hand up and down and the light reflecting off the oil makes you both shine like gold.

He moans and you watch the muscles of his abs flex as he feels the orgasm coming on, helpless to it and your skilled hand.

“I’m going to come.” He groans sounding sorry for and drops his hips.

“No, you won’t. I did not say that you can” Zemo says like the villain behind you.

“I can’t it hold back” Bucky pants, his voice is thin he sounds like he very well might lose control and you feel him pulse in your palm. You twist your hand around sliding it down to the base thinking it might help hold him off if your focus is less near the collection of nerve endings.

Zemo stands and comes to you, tapping your shoulder. You let him go with a quick up and down and Bucky’s disappointment is the saddest thing you’ve ever heard.

When Zemo looks down at the wonderfully pitiful sight, Bucky shuts his eyes. “Yellow.” He whispers. “Please, yellow.”

“All right.” Zemo says kindly and gives his head a rub. “Rest”

“Thank you.” Bucky manages.

You stand not caring what Zemo says and kiss Bucky’s cheek.

“You okay?” You ask, your hand on his shoulder, lifting his chin to look at his face.

“Please… don’t, don’t touch me for a minute?” He asks and you give an embarrassed laugh understanding his request. You’re not exactly innocent in his torment.

“Of course I’m sorry I…” Your sentence is cut off.

Zemo has you by the back of your arms and pulls you tight against him. “You, not her.”

Bucky sighs dropping his head.

“I’m still confused. Is, this what you wanted?” He asks feigning ignorance though with you naked its clear what Zemo means.

Bucky won’t look.

“Answer me.”

“No, I mean— yes Baron.” He concedes.

You feel Zemo’s laugh along your neck. “You wouldn’t have been fast enough to finish before I found you. Well, maybe you, but not her. Tell me, how quickly can you make her come?”

“What?”

“How quickly?”

You shut your eyes as soon as you realize where this is going.

“I don’t know. I mean she always got there.” Bucky says sounding slightly self conscious.

Zemo smiles. “Two minutes. I can finish her off in just two.”

“Ha!” Bucky doesn’t believe him, who would.

Oh Bucky…

“Tell him it’s true.” Zemo leans towards you.

You nod glancing at them both. “He does this… thing.” You tell Bucky. “He works my spot and my clit at the same time and I come. Fast.” You say simply and totally helpless to it.

“It’s not always the most fun, rarely my first choice; but great when we’re in a hurry.” He shrugs and takes a knee before you even realize that he has. “Open your legs.” He says looking up at you.

Your eyes go wide, surprised to see him down and waiting with Bucky watching. Still, you part your thighs and wisely lay your hands on his shoulders knowing you won’t be able to stay upright without the support.

“This? Right James? This warm, tight, safe place? This is what you wanted?” Zemo asks, teasing Bucky with the way he slides his fingers between your velvet soft folds. You feel him turn his hand and his finger circles your entrance. He sighs and takes hold of your hip to keep you in place.

Two fingers slip inside and you hiss against the stretch, biting your lip as your head lolls to the side. You try to hold in the loudest of your noise but it’s hopeless.

The Baron starts to do his thing and you wonder if you might be able to deny him the pleasure of making you come in front of Bucky again, but just like always you end up gripping his shoulders to keep from falling as he does a perfect come hither with his two fingers as his thumb rubs with the perfect amount of pressure on your throbbing clitoris. He can’t resist and licks your peak for good measure until you hold your breath as he sucks sloppily and until you come on his hand and just as quickly as always. Your wild moaning is nearly feral but you could not care less. It makes you smile to hear him laugh softly so pleased with himself and you and your eyes shut as you pant, catching your breath.

Lowering your head, your eyes only half open, you both look over at Bucky who is glaring at the Baron.

“James.”

“Yes.”

“Stop breaking the rules.”

“Yes Baron.” He says giving in completely.

Zemo smiles and slowly pulls his fingers free from you, raising his hand just enough to show them so wet and sticky and glistening. He kisses your belly and looks up at you. “Go lie down.” He says rubbing your stomach, smoothing his hand over your soft tuft of hair. You’re still floating as you do, happy to go and rest and leave them to it.

“Would you like to come now?” You hear Zemo ask Bucky as he gets up and goes around the chair.

“Please.” Bucky whispers watching you sink down onto the bed on your side.

“I can finish you off just as quickly as I did her.”

“Yes. Please.” He begs through clenched teeth rising up again as if presenting himself to be relieved, the steady rush of blood to his lower half turning his cock a darker shade of desperate as it rises up like a tower ready to fall. “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you.” He pants “I’m sorry I tried to fuck her. I’m sorry for breaking your rules. And I will do anything, please just… fuck. Please!”

Helmut leans down hushing him, pressing his face close to Bucky’s, grabbing him around the chest as his left hand comes reaching over his stomach promising an end to the day’s long torment.

He grips the soldiers gorgeous, endlessly taunted dick; your natural lubricant replacing the oil to help glide his fingers along.

When Zemo starts to work Bucky you can see through the look on his face that this is all he’s wanted to do for so long and you are reminded that this is as much the Baron’s discipline as it is yours— as it is Bucky’s.

Bucky makes a deep sound that gets your attention. His body flexes and you think he looks like a bomb ready to blow. A sexy, finely muscled, lightly tanned bomb with a look of pained excitement as his legs open and his jaw flexes.

“Are you mine James?” Zemo asks, his lips brushing his ear,

“Yes” He says pitifully raising his hips, thrusting once into the Baron’s hand just as Zemo lets go. A deep frown fixes between Bucky’s brows as he waits until Zemo grabs again and starts to perfectly stroke him.

Bucky’s mouth opens, his eyes fix on the incredibly hypnotic rhythm of Zemo’s hand.

“You’ve always been mine haven’t you?”

“Yes!” Bucky nearly shouts, his brows turned down with the exquisite anguish of the nearing release.

“Say it again,” Zemo demands, his right arm tight around Bucky, his eyes shut relishing in the control and the love, you listen to the wet rhythm as it gets faster.

“Yes.”

“Say it!”

“I’ve always been yours” Bucky moans loudly and glances over at you unable to keep your hand away from your pussy selfishly wanting to come again.

“Once more.” Helmut says opening his eyes. The muscle of his arm is flexed beautifully as he pounds.

Bucky moans so similarly to you that Helmut just smiles. He knows, he understands the hold he has over you both.

“I’m yours” Bucky manages and the Baron focuses his movement as if pulling the orgasm from Bucky’s body willing it to come forward. He jerks his hand up and away…but this time he’s finished the job.

He holds Bucky as the man cries out, his hips rising high this time, his cock pulsing with a tight up and down as he finally —god, finally— gives a high pitched groan with that first explosive release of come that shoots past his stomach and onto his own chest followed by equally satisfying spasms that send milky droplets flying free into the air and across his stomach onto Zemo’s arms; Bucky’s groaning and gasping near tears with the absolute exhaustion and relief of his well deserved climax, his moans and gasps of surprise so raw and unaffected.

By the time he lowers back down to the chair unable to do much more than sit there, limp and panting with his eyes closed, Helmut is holding him, caring nothing for the mess. He seems to love the sight of the pearlescent results of Bucky’s incredible orgasm as much as you do.

Smiling as he strokes Bucky’s hair, kissing his temple, he says with a tone only Helmut Zemo could manage at a moment like this, “You see. When you listen to me, I make it worth every second, every moment of torment. Yes?”

Bucky nods but it’s weak.

Zemo chuckles softly, kisses him again and reaches down easily undoing the ropes.

“Look at you both.” He says trying to sound angry, as if it’s not all his fault. “You can’t come to dinner like this. I’ll run a bath.”

He leaves Bucky and comes to the bed bending over you, his hand so sticky from the combination is heavy on your belly as he kisses your lips. “Hows your ass?” He asks.

“Still on fire.” You say and he winks as he rises.

“Good."

“You’re pretty quiet over there.” Bucky says splashing you from across the large tub. You’ve both been in for a while now after Zemo took a quick shower and left you alone letting you know he’d be up waiting at the dinner table.

Roused from your daydream but still not sure you want to talk about why you’re so quiet, you glance over and shrug.

“Whats wrong? You’re not mad about what happened are you?” Bucky asks sliding a little closer. The tub is surprisingly big in an already large bathroom and yet again you wonder how you’ll return to real life when this all ends.

“What happened?” You ask him.

“Getting you in trouble? He really put a shine on your backside.” Bucky says, a smile breaking through any attempt at being serious.

You sit up surprised to hear that’s what he thinks it could be. “Ha! No. Not at all. That was amazing… god” You tip your head back, the image of Bucky, naked and tired to a chair with Zemo holding him and whispering in his ear will be seared into your mind for life. “I didn’t know you could come that much.” You say, slowly looking back down at him,trying not to giggle.

“Neither did I.” He says practically blushing before he grins. “Same goes for you.” He tosses right back.

You laugh and roll your eyes. “Okay well we both know he’s capable of turning us into sex crazed idiots apparently.” You say with a cheeky grin and Bucky laughs shaking his head with a sigh.

“What is it? Some Sokovian spell or something, magic from the old world?” Bucky says with a thick accent wiggling his wet soapy fingers in the air.

Laughing you scrunch your nose. “Nah, that’s all him. Just wait until you’ve been around him long enough to get to the good stuff.”

“The good stuff!” He looks shocked “Well what the hell is all this!”

“This is amazing, but it not… well it’s not him. Theres so much more than sex. Watching tv. Eating dinner in bed. Naps— once he read to me.” You say with a sigh and the room goes silent as you both slip into a day dream laced with Helmuts beautiful voice surrounding you as he reads the classics on a warm summer night…

“You think he sits around daydreaming about us like this?” Bucky asks with a frown. “I worry sometimes.”

“Really?” You ask looking into his big blue eyes. Hundred years old and still so sweet. “Of course he does. Bucky, he wouldn’t have done any of this if he didn’t spend as much time thinking of us as we do him. Don’t be so naive”

He nods looking out the window and you know he’s just out of practice. He probably had a swarm of girls around him back when his life was normal. Maybe even a secret guy. But how long ago had that been. And since he’d been released from the words, his only real time spent with anyone has been with the two of you. For a moment you wonder if that’s fair. He should go out on dates or something, but then again you did try to get him on some apps. He hated them all. Women swiped right like it was their job of course, but he thought it was strange and wanted to meet them the old fashioned way but when he did he could only focus on what he didn’t like and just compared them to you— and Zemo.

“Hey.” You get his attention again. “I mean it, I’m really not upset about anything that happened earlier. Thanks for being such a rule breaker.” You say with a wink.

“No problem” He laughs as if that was his intention. Bucky’s expression softens as he sits back, the water rocking under the bubbles.

Bubbles. Talk about a diva, is anyone is on this big ass boat it’s him. Two adults having a bath drawn from them; why not throw in the bubbles. You roll your eyes ignoring the way your chest gets tight with the feel of being so adored and loving every second of his over the top ways and focus on Bucky who looks stunning in the bath— your heart sinking just a little.

“So what is it?” He asks unaware of your many distractions.

You look back to the window staring up at the sky for a while. “I’m just… sad.” You say giving in to the truth “I mean, I’m thrilled being here. But I’ve had this idea that I could talk you into staying with us. I keep imagining this life with you and Helmut and I know it can’t happen for so many reasons but I’m stubborn and spoiled. I truly hate not getting my way. So I keep thinking, maybe.”

He goes quiet now understanding, and then you feel his hand on your knee under the water. “I know. I’ve thought about it too. Maybe a little too much. Definitely enough that I’ve almost convinced myself it could work, but no. It just wouldn’t.”

You press your lips hesitant to say in case you might offend him but decide to just go for it. “And you’re sure it’s not just that you miss it? Saving the world and everything? I mean, I can see how it would be appealing— from controlled killer to stoic hero.” You tease gently, wiggling your brows up and down until he laughs a little, probably more annoyed than you’d like, and whatever facade you’d put on crumbles. The look of heartbreak turns your brows down, twisting your face with the agony of losing him. He looks surprised to see you so broken about it and finds your hand through the water.

“Hey hey hey.” He pulls but you’re not in the mood to be comforted. Bucky hates when you don’t let him coddle you, but he knows better than to fight it so he simply answers your question. “Yes.Well. No I mean, it’s nice. But honestly, if you really want to know, I could get used to being domesticated.” He shrugs letting go of your hand as he looks towards the shower where Zemo was and you swallow the tears that have been overpowered by your intrigue.

Managing a laugh at his expense you poke his arm on the rim of the tub. “Really? By me or Helmut?” You ask and swear you see him blush.

“You’ve already proven you can turn me into a homebody, and happy to be there, so —Maybe both?” He shrugs and there is such a tone of possibility in his statement that you’re instantly transported into a world in which the three of you are living happily. Maybe in this Mediterranean paradise, you’ve just come home from the market with ingredients for a dinner that Bucky has asked you to pick up and you help him cook while music blasts in your small but bright kitchen and you dance around until the house smells delicious and you set the table, flirting and toying with one another until everything looks beautiful before rushing to sit just as your Baron comes through the door…

Even here and now sitting in the tub with you, Bucky looks like the sweetest house husband glowing a soft gold in the light of the sun. What you wouldn’t give to be his forever. His his and hers, you think and your chin quivers with the threat of happy miserable tears.

Bucky isn’t oblivious to your hurting but he’s trying to keep strong, he can’t give in to you, not this time. “We’ll never know if I stick around.” He says and your little vision fades “I think I’ve got one visit, maybe two in me before someone notices an avenger hanging around their town and his cover is blown. You don’t want that. I don’t want that. I’d never forgive myself."

“I know.” You say and only realize that your head is down when his hand, which is covered in white bubbles reaches to lift your chin.

“Hey, come one. None of that. We’ve only got a little bit of time. I just want to make the most of it. Give me enough good memories to finally forget about whats left of the bad.”

You smile and nod, blowing the bubbles away before they go up your nose. “Fine.” You sigh and look back out the window hugging your knees. “Buck, can I ask you something?”

“Of course.” He says only cringing a little when you call him Buck.

“Do you think you might ever love him?”

Bucky freezes. He looks— odd. Uncomfortable. Exposed? You realize very quickly that he already does, even if he’s not aware of it and decide not to push him

“It’s okay. I was just curious.” You say and try to calm him with your smile “We come from very different worlds. Letting myself love a man like Helmut Zemo took little to no effort for me, for you— I know why it might come as a shock. But I think you’ll find, when you do admit it to yourself and to him, he might just surprise you with how quickly he says it back.”

#zemo x reader #bucky barns x you #winterbaron #winterbaron x you #buckybarnes/zemo #tfatws #bucky barnes fanfiction #james buchanan barnes #winterbaron fic #baron helmut zemo #zemo #self insert #yacht life #these two #i love them so much #also ouch

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darkacademicfrom2021 · 3 years

Text

The Dark Team (part 6)

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“What did you fuck up?”, you heard Loki’s sharp whisper through the earbud, while you frantically searched through papers and papers and some more papers.

“I didn’t fuck up. I have the guy. I have information”, cleared Bucky. “Hey, DON’T MOVE”, he shouted at the kidnapped, cocking his gun. He cleared his throat before talking again. “Good and bad news”.

“Must be Christmas”, you said.

“No, Christmas is when you only have good news”, said Bucky.

“Not in my family. Generally, there was only bad news and food. Food was the good news”.

“I love how professional and focused on the mission you two are. Stark would be so proud”.

“Wait, I’m invested now. Tell me more about your family, y/n”.

“For the Norns, I don’t have much time. The information, Barnes”. You could hear Loki's footsteps resonate. According to plan, he should've been walking through a hall full of burocrats, so he was right; he did not have much time.

“Okay, so, I know who has the stick”.

“Good”.

“He’s dead”.

“Not so good”.

“Not really, no”.

“What do we do now?”.

An alarm on the building had set off and every door locked down, with a man on a speaker announcing the disappearance of an important object followed by an awfully accurate description of the three of you.

“We run, that’s what we do now”.

You didn’t have to say more. Bucky threw himself off the window before it finished closing. You looked around desperately, trying to find a way to free yourself from that office. Two security guards entered the room screaming for you to get on the floor, and instead you made an unstable wall with the desk and chairs, avoiding getting shot and giving you enough time to figure out some sort of weapon to take them down.

The watch was already used, the knives were useless if they had guns, you didn’t have a gun yourself (silly you), and the parachute was apparently not working anymore, so you couldn’t jump off the window like your teammates. Damn.

“By any chance”, you whispered through your microphone “could you tele…”, but Loki gave you no time to finish the sentence and teleported himself to the office, still in the shape of a security guard.

“My dearest friend”, he said to one of the shooters, opening his arms welcomingly, “how’s the family?”.

“What the fuck, Robert?” asked angrily one of the real guards. “How did you…”.

Loki kicked off his gun and touched his head with a halo of green lights, making him fall unconscious to the floor. He looked up and down at the second security guard and formed half a smile.

“And what about your wife? Is she well?”.

“You ain’t Robert, ain’t ya?”.

“Mmh, nah”.

You grabbed the second security guard from behind and made him trip, immobilizing his arms and legs, and held his own gun to his head. Loki watched you amused, and then transformed back into himself.

“Oh, there you are”, you greeted him. “Did Buck say anything about the walking dead?”.

“The… what?”.

“The man with the stick. If he’s dead, who activated the alarm? Someone has to have it”.

“He didn’t say anything else. Can’t you track it down?”.

“If I could, why would we have done all of this for?”.

“Point made”.

“I need to get back to our room, take some things off the checklist before going all in for a new plan”.

“Alri…”, he started saying, but his gaze fell back on the immobilized guard you were holding down. “What are you planning on doing with him? He saw our faces”.

“If you let me live I won’t talk about this at all”, he pleaded, face squished against the floor. “I have kids, please”.

“He’s lying, he has no kids”, he said with a neutral face, and you looked at him trying to tell him to communicate telepathically. Surprisingly, he understood. “What?”.

“I’m not killing him, what do we do?”.

“Just kill him, what’s all the fuss about?”. You looked at him horrorized and he rolled his eyes “alright, just threaten him enough”.

You let him go, still pointing the gun at him, and gestured to the door so he could leave. When he reached for the door knob, you shot twice at the wall, mere inches from his head, and he froze in place.

“Talk and I’ll find you”, you threatened.

“I won't say a word, I promise”.

You looked at Loki and he nodded, letting you know the man was telling the truth. You kept your eyes fixed on him while he ran away, terrified. Must be new, you thought. Loki grabbed your waist.

“What the Hell are you doing?”, you pushed him away.

“Teleporting us, as you asked”.

“You have to grab me to do that?”.

“I don’t have to. It’s so you get stability”.

“Oh. Give me a big bear hug, then. No, better, let’s cuddle” you spat with sarcasm. He sighed annoyed, massaging his temples.

“Fine. I’m not even touching you”.

As he teleported both of you, you felt your whole body tear its own cells apart and dissolve, and then regenerate them. Your head spinned like it never has, and something hit your head; but you weren’t sure if it was the floor, a wall or the roof, for your sense directions were nowhere to be found. You took a few seconds to compose yourself before opening your eyes once everything stopped moving. When you finally managed to realize where your head even was, your eyes met with Loki’s, who was holding back a smirk with his arms crossed.

“Reconsidering that cuddle next time, are you?”.

“That was… hilarious. Such a shame I missed the previous part to give me context, though”, said Bucky from the counter of the hotel room, munching on some chips. “Look, the tiny fridge had these. You were right, they’re actually great”.

“Yeah. Grab whatever, they’re on Stark’s”, you said, still with your head a bit fuzzed. Loki offered his hand to help you get up but you did it yourself. He sighed.

“How do you fit your clothes with that huge ego of yours?”.

“I don’t, I walk around naked”, you answered, opening the nearest laptop and starting to work on the checklist.

That night was like the last one. Dark, silent and with your head full on the work. Bucky was barely snoring, and Loki was sitting on his bed reading a book. Every once in a while you glanced up your work to look at how painfully beautiful he was. You hated every thought about it, of course, but you couldn’t deny his sight grew on you a bit. He was an asshole, of course. A parasite on your head. An inconvenience. A distraction, sometimes. But the warm light of the bed lamp and the shadows it formed on half of his face enhanced his features, almost like a sculpture, a piece of art.

While you thought of that you checked on his expressions, making sure he wasn’t listening to your highly embarrassing thoughts.

After a few hours, Bucky had already woken up and you were still spread on the floor, surrounded by the files and laptops from before. The light conversation had caught half the attention of the God, who was still reading peacefully. He seemed so calm you wondered what kept him up anyways.

“You think he still has it on him?”, asked Bucky, changing his shirt.

“I think it’s a possibility. I’m tracking his body down. Should be in the morgue by now, maybe they haven’t taken off his clothes yet. But if not, the security cameras would have recorded who took it from the body”.

“Groovy”.

"Oh my God, James".

"What?".

"What does groovy even mean?".

"You know... it's like saying cool beans".

"Coo... alright".

After a while, you collected all the data you needed for tomorrow. You were so exhausted your eyes were getting dry and blurry. Loki was still reading in that same place, not even fazed by the amount of hours that had happened. You got up to clean the dishes from the last meal, and he lifted his gaze up from the book.

“Wait”, he stopped you. With a wrist movement, the dishes got as clean as they could get and arranged on the shelf. You chuckled.

“I wish I had that ability”.

“Are you going to sleep now?”.

“A few hours”.

“Sleep here”, he said from his bed. You looked at Bucky’s; he fell asleep back again.

“You haven’t slept yet. I don’t want to occupy your bed”.

“I won’t, don’t worry”, you nodded, kind of worried he might pass out of tiredness in the middle of the mission. Why the hell was he not sleeping? “If it doesn’t bother you, I’d rather finish this book on here too”.

“I think there’s enough space”.

He moved and gave you space for half of the tiny bed, and you laid by his side with your arms crossed and a leg on top of the other. He went back to his book, and even though he was sitting and your sight couldn’t reach the pages, you were sure it was in Old Norse.

“What are you reading?”.

He didn’t answer right away. Doubtfully as in to share it with you or not, he then proceeded.

“Hamlet. It’s a translation in Old Norse from an author I adore. I’d say it’s an even better version than Shakespeare’s”.

You felt yourself about to smile. You tried not to, but you probably did. That was your favourite piece of literature of all times. You wondered how could that have gotten to Asgardian hands, and why would he (certainly a Midgardian hater) want to read Earth’s literature. You were so curious in that version. Was it really that good, that would be better than Shakespeare himself? Sadly, you didn’t even know how to say hello in that language.

“Do you like it so far?”.

“I’m re-reading it. Brings good memories”, he said with a subtle smile he had hoped you wouldn’t notice. But you did. Something in your chest warmed up a bit and you shook it off. No, no. Not feelings. Don’t confuse your physical attraction, don’t feed your touch starved soul. No. You had to repeat to yourself a couple of times. You were just very, very tired.

“Brings good memories to me too. I love this book”. You figured it was alright to open up a little. The situation was relaxed enough. He wasn’t snarky or avoidant. He looked… melancholic. Sad, even. Like a facet of himself he didn’t allow everyone to see.

You connected with that. Maybe you could even relate to him in some way. For years, you had a feeling of something not adding up quite right. A longing for something you couldn’t exactly pin up. Melancholy for a blank space.

But there you were, barely knew him for three days yet felt close enough. Not too much. Just a feeling. Just the traces of something that maybe happened in another life. But in this one, you would get the mission done and leave. So don’t get attached, you ordered yourself.

“It’s a really good version”.

“Wish I could read it but I don’t know Old Norse”, you said slower than you intended. Loki chuckled at your tiredness. Maybe you could push your curiosity a little further. What was the damage? That he could just say ‘piss off’ or something like that? “What good memories does it bring to you?”.

He sighed and muttered almost to himself “I used to read it to my beloved”.

You almost gasped, surprised he actually answered you. You didn’t ask for more. It was already a lot he had just trusted you with. He told you he had a beloved. You didn’t even know he had a lover, but of course he had. He was nearly a thousand years old; why wouldn’t he? Did he lose that lover, in past tense?

Curiosity grew bigger on you, but fear pushed you aback. But the questions floated around in your head as a lullaby. Your head started to weigh a little more on the pillow and everything happened slightly slower. Loki closed the book and left it resting on his lap. He whispered “I feel you have questions”, and you denied it with your head. Your eyelids fell heavier than before.

“I’m mmnmnnhnm”, you managed to sort of say before getting knocked down by sleep. You heard his laughter, but nothing more after that.

#loki #loki of asgard #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #loki x reader #loki mcu #loki x gender neutral reader #loki x y/n #bucky barnes is an old man omg

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buckys-black-dress · 3 years

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friday night - bucky barnes x fem!reader (college!au)

a/n: hi! so as per the request of a lovely girl who asked for more frat!bucky, without further ado, here it is! just to let y’all know, i love frat!bucky so i will NEVER say no to more of him-- and thank you @xicanalarraa for being my first request ever !!! -ali

wc: 1.4k

Having a boyfriend in a fraternity was difficult.

But it was even more difficult when said fraternity threw parties every. single. weekend.

Sometimes you just wanted quality time with Bucky, and you only had so many opportunities to be in your apartment alone with your roommates that were always around.

So when you asked Bucky if you guys could maybe just stay in his room and watch a movie while the party happened downstairs, you thought that it would be fine, that you could just have a calm Friday night in. It was rare that you guys spend quality time together these past few weeks, as finals were in full swing.

And since everyone was done with finals, tonight’s celebration was louder than ever.

“Hon, you want some snacks? I can go grab some from downstairs.” Bucky piped up from where you were leaning into him on his bed, the movie playing on the TV in front of you two.

“Uhm, sure. You’ll be okay down there?” You smirked, knowing how Tony and Thor could drag him into a party.

“I’ll be back in a flash, doll,” he flashed a smirk as he pulled away from your hold, swinging the door and shut it behind him.

The movie was about a quarter way through when Bucky left, and about 20 minutes had passed since he left.

What the hell could he be getting that’s taking this long?

You really didn’t want to go downstairs, so you settled with texting him. After another 10 minutes with no response, you felt like you had no choice, heaving yourself up from the warmth of Bucky’s giant bed and making your way down the stairs.

Of course, the first place you thought to check was the kitchen, but that was dead end, as Bucky was nowhere to be found.

But you know where he would be found?

Doing a keg stand.

A fucking keg stand.

Cheers and whoops were being chanted all around your boyfriend who was upside down on a keg of beer. So of course, your first instinct is to tug at Steve’s sleeve, who was standing off to the side talking to a pretty brunette.

“Y/N? What’s up, I thought you were upstairs with Buck?” He asked, confused.

“Yeah, well, he came downstairs to get snacks. That was like, half an hour ago. So I came down to see if he was alright, but it looks like he’s more than fine.” You turn your head to where Bucky is now just standing up from the keg, cheering on with everyone as Tony and Same pat him on the back.

“He’s... he’s a fuckin’ idiot, Y/N, I’m sorry.” Steve says apologetically, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“Whatever... it’s alright. I know we haven’t seen much of each other because we were busy studying, and I know he wants to have fun, but he could’ve just told me he wanted to party instead of watching a dumb movie with me...” Your voice trailed off as you lost more and more of your confidence. If he didn’t want to spend time with me, he could’ve just said so.

Steve opened his mouth to say more, but before he could, the brunette from before came back from refilling her drink, and he shot you look saying, ‘I’m sorry, but I’m here if you want to talk.’

You just put on a fake smile and walked back upstairs to get your bag you’d brought, thinking you’d spend the night, but it was becoming clearer Bucky had no intention of finishing the movie with you.

As you were opening the front door of the house to leave, a hand grabbed yours, making you freeze and tug it out of the strangers’ hold.

Oh, not a stranger.

“Where ya goin, doll?” Bucky’s voice was a bit slurred, but you knew he wasn’t completely wasted.

“Home, since you don’t seem to want to spend time with me, Buck. If you wanted to party tonight, you could’ve just asked me to come another night. You don’t have to feel guilty or obligated to spend time with me, but next time just be straightforward.” You finished, your voice low and surprisingly not angry at all. Just a bit... dejected.

After making it back home and getting into bed, your thoughts floated all around your mind.

Was I too harsh? Why didn’t he just tell me he wanted to go to the party? Am I too clingy?

All these thoughts were jumbling together until you fell into a dreamless sleep.

The next morning, your body felt heavier than ever as you pressed the button to brew on your coffee maker, your roommates watching you warily from the couch.

“Y/N, weren’t you supposed to stay at Bucky’s last night?” Nat asked you.

“I was... I think he wanted to go to the party but he felt bad, so he stayed in with me. Then I found him doing a keg stand... so...” You explained, the look of pity overtaking Nat and Wanda’s faces.

“Aw, honey, it’s okay. We can spend the day doing something fun today! How ‘bout a mall trip, a little treat for after finals?” Wanda chimed in.

“Yeah... that sounds fun...” You really didn’t want to go out, but it would be better for you than staying home and wallowing.

After a few hours of shopping and trying on every piece of clothing in sight, you made your way back home, ready to settle in for the night with a box of pizza and a bottle of wine.

Only the lights were already on when you 3 walked in, and the door was unlocked.

“Wan, did you lock the door when we left?” You asked cautiously, your hand still on the knob.

“Oh! I must’ve forgotten, silly me.” She giggled, waving a hand in front of her face.

What you missed as you turned back around was the look your two roommates shared, a mischievous grin on both of their faces.

When you reached your room, you jaw dropped after you pushed open the door.

“Bucky? What are you doing here?” Your voice was breathy, taking in the scene before you.

Bucky had essentially transformed your room into a cozy movie theater, with blankets and pillows, dimmed, twinkling lights, and a movie ready to be played.

“I... I can’t explain to you how sorry I am for last night, angel. I didn’t mean to make you feel like I’d choose a party over you, and I never wanted you to think you’re my second choice. You’re my everything, sweetheart. I thought I could entertain Tony for a bit so he’d get off my back about not coming to the party, but I should’ve talked to you first. Please, please forgive me?” Bucky ended his speech with opening his arms, hoping you’d come closer to him.

When you felt your eyes well up not only at his speech, but this whole gesture, your body moved on its’ own accord into his arms.

“Bucky, you know you can always talk to me, right? I don’t want you to feel like you have to hide anything from me, I’m always here to listen.” You told him while you buried your face in his neck.

“I- I know, doll. I was so stupid. I love you so much.” Bucky’s voice was full of conviction.

“You’re not stupid, Bucky. Just a little... weird sometimes when you make decisions. And I love you too, you big fool.” You laughed, leaning up to give him a peck on the lips.

“Yeah, I see that now. Whaddaya say, let’s do it right this time?” He suggested, nodding to your bed.

“Sure Buck, let me get out of these jeans first.” You smiled, pulling off your pants and pulling on a pair of his boxers you had and a t-shirt of his, and cuddling into his side.

Bucky’s lips met the crown of your head, whispering, “There’s no where else I’d rather be, doll.” As he smiled down at you, your face mirrored it.

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes one shot #college!bucky x reader #college au #college!bucky #frat!bucky #request #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky imagine

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bubbleyumss · 3 years

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The Scorch - LOKI- BUCKY mini-fic.

Hi there! I haven’t posted any written works on here for years, so forgive me that my first one back may be a little rusty! I just want to share a small fic I wrote with some of you, hopefully you enjoy.

So its after Endgame, lets forget that Loki dies thanku v much, and Steve doesn’t have his ending either. It’s a lil messy as I’m not great with crossing storylines, I usually just insert the reader into already written ones.. This may eventually lead to a split off between Loki and Bucky, the reader will have to choose who they want! But for now, it’s very Loki based. Lmk if u like, and any suggestions on continuing. Thx:)

Warnings - Violence/use of blades/knives and fire/scalding/burning.

Word count - 4K

It was unimaginable that we would all make it back from Thanos's army, but we knew it was nothing short of a miracle and we were all insanely grateful for this. Tony wasn't the same, his body was withering faster than it would have done before, but he knew that this was nothing that he couldn't seek to fix, seeing as his mind was as quick witted as ever. Barton took off back to his family, bringing Natasha with him for some much-needed time off, though Nat was never one to back down if there was a mission that was needed to be handled. This was the stage that I was at these days.

I hadn't joined the team too soon before the snap, but when I did, I had already lost those dearest to me, finding my home within the Avengers compound thanks to Tony. Though I hadn't seen much of him through the years after the snap, as I was tasked with tailing Rogers, he had always told me that I was welcome at his cabin table with his wife and daughter, making his family such dear friends of mine.

The Avengers compound was my home now, even though Tony had permanently retired from the team, there were a few of us that still worked under Fury, choosing to live there so that we were safe. The Vision and Wanda lived here for now, until such a time that their new home was built, the Captain, Bucky and Sam dropped by from time to time, acting like they didn't want to be a part of any team but always finding themselves socialising happily when they did. Same went for Nat, as she found comfort in Bruce's room sometimes, much to the pretended ignorance of us all. Thor stopped by often, claiming that Norway may be good for comfort, but sometimes he needed the discipline to get him back in his head.

It was on one of these trips that he decided to bring the newest member of the team, his brother, Loki.

"You've got to be kidding me." Steve said, standing with his arms crossed in the lounge. Steve, James, Nat, and I sat within, prepping me for my next assignment in Argentina. "No way is he joining the team."

"Last time I checked you're not even on the team yourself, Captain." He raven-haired man smirked, glancing to me, then back to Steve. I had heard of Loki, mainly from Thor, but it was clear that everyone had some sort of opinion of him, and the majority of it was bad. I had always been intrigued, as before I joined the team, I was hardly the golden child, which was how I came onto Fury's radar in the first place, so I knew what effect the evil expectations had on a person.

"Not officially." He responded, looking down to Nat, "But there are people on the team that will have an issue." Loki then looked to Nat, eyebrows raised, expecting her to agree and wish for him not to join.

"Oh, come on, comrades, Loki is different now, trust me!" Thor smiled, clapping his brother on the back, much to his annoyance, "He's still miserable as ever, but he will fight with us, not against us."

"Fury clearly trusts me enough to allow me to join your little club." He smiled, raising his hands, "I just wish for the place to stay, since my home was blown up and the new home smells of cod." He sneered, looking at Thor's disapproving face. I looked to the faces on those who sat before me, knowing that they all were only here part time either way, realising that perhaps I should speak. I stood, making them all turn to me, Loki's eyes set on mine full of intent.

"Well, I think we should give him a shot." I shrugged, "I was allowed even though I burnt down a city or two, so, I don't see why not." I smiled at Steve, then down to Nat, all showing equally unamused faces, Bucky's especially. It was always odd looking at his face and remembering our past, though in times like this I could see his anger as a simple ruse, knowing that he agreed with me wholeheartedly. "He can come with me to Argentina, as a test run." I suggested, making Bucky scoff.

"No way." He muttered.

"Yeah, I agree, that's a terrible idea." Steve shook his head. I could feel a sense of anger boiling inside me, which wasn't unfounded; they often looked at me like a younger sister, just as they did with Nat, but I supposed as they knew her for longer, they knew that she could handle herself. I could too, they just hadn't seen that yet.

"Tough. He's coming with me." I replied, defying their looks of shock. "God of Mischief, you're with me. Argentina, small hydra starts up, do you think you can handle it?" I had made my way to him at this point, only within a couple of steps of him. He smirked, and suddenly I lost all confidence I had started out with; his eyes looked me up and down, drinking me in in such an intimidating way. He was a god, far more powerful than me, and for whatever reason I really wanted to know him better.

"Of course."

As much as I started out wanting to side with the God, one jet ride with him and I already regretted it. I decided to try and get to know him, to ask him some questions about himself, only receiving sarcastic remarks as his responses. I had asked him of his time in New York, though supposing that it was a sore subject I opted to talk about his powers and what he could actually do, as I had only heard, though when he told me that it was nothing that would interest a human, I grew inpatient. He wished to play around, not to let me know him at all, and so I decided to just stop talking.

"Your eyes, do they relate to your talents?" He then asked after nearly half an hour of silence. I nearly completely ignored him, feeling that similar rage that I had attempted to defend this guy, and all he repaid me in was rudeness.

"Kind of." I replied, not wishing to talk any more.

"Well, they are beautiful." He commented, taking me by surprise. This of course wasn't the only compliment I have ever had on my eyes, the gold sheen often took people by surprise, but why on earth did he think that it was appropriate to say now?

"Why won't you answer any of my questions about you?" I then asked, taking the attention off his own question. He was silent for a minute, "I took a chance taking you along, I could have said no."

"Don't act like you have done me a favour, I could find somewhere else to live if I needed to." He scoffed, angering me further. My knuckles tightened around the jets steering, trying to keep it together.

"I have done you a favour, you clearly want in this group or you wouldn't have shown up." I retorted, "Is it so bad that I want to know you a little more? We're both the odd ones out-"

"You do not know what it is like being me." He interrupted, gaining his own anger now, "Do not pretend you do, you are just a human with some magic tricks." I watched from the corner of my eye as he rolled his eyes, slouching back in his seat, "Tricks that I have not even seen, by the way, so please try not to need saving too much while we complete this mission."

I closed my mouth, not wishing for my anger to get the better of me just yet. I knew that I had to contain it and utilise it for the mission, so that I didn't have to rely on Loki at all. I felt a sudden rush of wanting to prove the god wrong.

"I really wanted to like you; you know." I said through gritted teeth, thankfully seeing our landing destination only a few miles ahead.

"And I knew that I wouldn't like you." He replied, his smirk heard through his words.

We stood either side of a large brick gateway, glancing behind it and trying to determine the best course of play. It was just a small branch of Hydra still floating around, those that had disappeared in the snap and had returned in a way to start up their resources again. There was a group of maybe fifteen men surrounding the compound, this compound that really was in the middle of nowhere and took us all of thirty minutes to sneak up to the gate, I looked over to Loki.

"You shapeshift, right?" I whisper-shouted, remembering Thor's stories of his brother turning to a snake. He nodded, face screwed, "Get one of those uniforms, take me in as prisoner." I suggested, watching as the cogs then whirred in his mind. "It's the easiest way." I tried to prompt him further.

"I don't like easy." He responded, then beginning to smirk, "I want to see your tricks." He motioned his hand to the gate, wishing for me to go in first. I furrowed my brows, allowing his arrogance to make my anger grow.

"Oh man, I really don't like you." I growled, coming to smirk after however, "But, if you insist."

I reached my hands over my shoulders to take a hold of my swords, watching Loki's eyes watch me as I pulled them in front of me, allowing my eyes to glint and set both blades alight. It was true that I had turned cities to ash before, and now it was clear to him that I had seriously and literally burnt them down. I turned, running as fast as I could into the sandy compound, managing to get near to the centre before any of them managed to turn their guns to me; before two of them could I allowed for my leg to spin out, spouting flames from the pad of my foot, catching the three that stood closest to me. They fell to the floor, rolling to get the burning away from them as their comrades began to shoot; I spun my swords in a way to deflect those bullets that came for me. Knowing that I couldn't stay on the ground any longer I pushed my legs, flinging me up about ten metres, coming down behind two of them and slicing their backs with my blades.

I could hear the fast footsteps of one of them attempting to come from behind, though he was stopped as I pointed my blade towards him, watching as the flames that encased the metal emerged from its tip to then surround the man. I smirked; it had felt good to get back in the action. I turned, quickly throwing one blade into the chest of another, running towards him and retrieving it from him before I spun the other, throwing those bullets back towards two others. I turned to look as two had retreated within, presumably to warn the others that worked inside; at this point I wondered if Loki had disappeared, or if he was simply lying-in wait for me to be done, either way, I heard the steps of more men barrelling towards me at pace. I threw my blades at two of them to my sides, one going through a chest, the other a stomach, leaving the last man coming for me head on.

He threw the first punch, easily missed by a duck to the right, and with only a knee to the stomach and an elbow to the back, the man was on the floor. I knew that these new hydra agents weren't going to be up to scratch, but I found it almost insulting that they were so terrible at fighting. I wrapped my hand around the man’s neck, picking him up to that his toes only touched the floor; I smirked, feeling the palm of my hand grow hotter and hotter as the man began to shout. Suddenly, the feeling of cold metal against the back of my head alerted me to the fact that I had missed a man, something to do with the distraction of fun that this had given me. I dropped the man to the ground, noting the boiled skin in the shape of my hand.

As I turned, the metal of the gun was dropped, as was the body of the man holding it. As his body fell, I saw the gold knife that was planted within his back slowly disappear, looking up to see Loki's smirking face as he walked towards me.

"See, if I was not here, you would have been dead." He raised his eyebrows, stopping short of laughing in my face. I growled, turning to retrieve my blades from the bodies nearby, dousing them before attaching them back to me. I looked around, seeing the scattered bodies, some still on fire and some not, but none remaining alive. "Nice tricks." He then said, trying to act as though he meant it. I rolled my eyes.

"Come on. We need to get whatever information we can."

It was one thing hearing of the powers that Loki possessed, and another to actually see them in action. The duplication, meaning one moment I thought I was talking and looking at the real him, only for it to vanish before my eyes and reveal he is several feet away from me. He had finally used his shapeshifting ability to change into one of the guards like I had suggested, letting himself into a room with ease before shooting down those inside. He seemed to like watching me watch him, I would stand back, impressed, after he would use his powers, and he would smirk at me once his show was over.

The control room was last, requiring us to actually fight together rather than one by one. I hadn't thought it would go as well as it did as he seemed to be someone who preferred to work alone, but as we fought it seemed we worked around each other well, him throwing his punches, grabbing a hold of an officer, and holding him up for me to burn.

"We seem to work well together, you and I." He said, panting once the last body had dropped. He smirked, having a look of surprise on his face.

"Or more I work well and you're a good sidekick." I shrugged, moving to the control computers where the officers from before had attempted to erase their hard drive. "They didn't manage to wipe it." I sighed a breath of relief, knowing that our fight hadn't been for nothing.

"Sidekick?" He questioned, coming to my side as I inserted the flash drive given to me before the mission.

"They have more start-ups." I then said, taking his attention away from me and to the screen. There was correspondence between them, showing at least five different locations to which, their information was coming or going. He leaned over, getting a better look, though as he did, I could suddenly feel his presence beside me. The smell of leather and whatever cologne God's now wore entered my nostrils, taking my brain away from what was before me. I thought Loki attractive, of course, but there is no way I could think of him in any other way than an annoying tagalong. not right now at least. "Brazil, Tunisia, the Ukraine." I sighed.

"Does that mean that we will have more missions together?" He then asked, attempting to sound disgusted. I rolled my eyes, trying not to smirk.

"No, it means that I will have more missions. I'm definitely not bringing you along." I scoffed, snatching the flash drive from the computer once it had finished downloading. I stood straight, only then realising how close he was to me. His eyes bore down at me, amusement shining within.

"That's good to hear. I don't think I could take any more of your little bonfire powers." He contested, trying not to break from his egotistical character. The hints of a smirk teased at his lips, and if the smell of burning flesh wasn't surrounding us both, and the urge to punch the smugness from his face wasn't growing in favour, I would have said we were having a moment.

"Let's get going then. Got to get you home so you can brush up on your magic act." I smiled a wry smile, pushing past him in attempts to leave. Though, the moment I came to the threshold of the door, I felt the searing burn of a blade being pushed through my chest. A soldier had stood by the door, waiting for his opportunity to strike, and finding it when I never bothered to check before stepping out. I dropped to my knees immediately, watching as a series of knives were then thrown into the chest of that very officer, forcing him to drop dead before me.

Loki suddenly came behind me, on his knees also, holding me up against his chest in a panic. He thought I was truly dying, and so I couldn't let this moment go by without playing him at his own game. I allowed myself to lean back, pulling the knife from my chest and throwing it to the floor before I looked up to him, taking in his look of worry.

"You can heal, right? You can heal..." He began to stutter, becoming even more shaky when I slowly shook my head. "No, you can't die, I-I will be blamed, this will be my fault." I scoffed, coughing as I did.

"You'll be blamed? Wow... you really do only care about yourself." I muttered, voice getting weaker as I spoke. "You can't even admit that you'd be sad if I died." I tried to muster a laugh, allowing it to make me cough further and forcing his grip on me to become tighter. His scent was intoxicating, so much so that I thought he must have done some magic to make it so; though what struck me most was the small flickers of green in his blue eyes, they were beautiful.

"You can't die." He then smiled, "I would have no one to vouch for me anymore." He whispered. This took me by surprise. My vouching for him must have actually meant something to him for it to affect him in such a way, though when thinking about it, I may have been the first one to do so in a very long time.

"You deserved the chance, Loki." I shrugged, wincing as the pain was still within my chest, his eyes held the torment that I was now putting him through, probably bringing up bad memories, I needed to bring this to an end, "I'd vouch for you again, you know... even if you don't like me." He chuckled.

"Of course, I like you," He smiled, "I wouldn't save the life of just anyone." The moment the words left his lips I sat myself up, wiping my chest of the dried blood from the knife. I heard no sound from him as I stood myself up, only turning to look at him when I had reconnected my swords to my back. He remained on his knees on the floor, looking up at me incredulously, noting the smirk on my face and trying to stop one coming to his own. "You weren't really dying?"

"Oh no, it takes a lot to kill me." I waved my hand dismissively, letting a smile grow on my face. It was only a second before he had gotten to his feet, placing his hand firmly around my neck and pushing me back against a wall.

"Not anyone can trick me." He growled, his voice hinting a slight tease. I smiled in his grasp, slowly raising my core temperature, and simply watching his eyes to see when he would notice. His hand gripped a little tighter and his eyes squinted, waiting as long as he possibly could before removing his hand in pain, blowing on it when he did.

"And not anyone can threaten me, your majesty." I smiled, "Time to go." I then suggested, turning away from him, and exiting down the corridor. His footsteps were quick to follow, coming to my tail as he sighed.

"So, what's the protocol for leaving? Do we just let the bodies be found?" He then asked, finally asking something about how we did things around here. He really did want to be a part of the team, and in reality, I was certain that he would fit in quite well. I smiled again, turning to him once we were facing the exit.

"Really Loki? Why do you think Fury sends me on these missions?" I asked, placing my fingertips to the wall. I started walking towards the exit, allowing my fingertips to dance along the wall, setting it alight in their wake. He followed close behind, the both of us only stopping when we were a few metres outside of the building, I looked to him as we relished in the spiralling flames, "Bonfire powers is pretty accurate, honestly." I shrugged, watching his smirk emerge.

"I am what some people call a 'mutant'. Nothing gave me my powers; I suppose I've always just hand them." I shrugged, "I burnt down my family home. Killing my family when I was five. I didn't know what I was doing." I didn't know why I suddenly felt the urge to tell Loki my whole life story on the jet ride home, but I think it had something to do with the fact that he had fought for me and with me, and that while he thought I was dying he really did try and make me feel better. "Then there were three foster homes after that that went down in smoke... a similar start up like that one was the only ones who took me in."

"Hydra..." I heard him whisper.

"Yes." I sighed, "But... I didn't need the brainwashing like the Winter Soldier... I did everything I did voluntarily." I coughed, shifting awkwardly. I knew that my story wasn't palatable to normal people, but as Loki wasn't normal and had enough blood on his hands for the both of us, I felt he could be trusted with the truth. "Fury said it was either work for him or be locked up somewhere. So." I shrugged. There was a long moment of silence, one, I assumed, because he wasn't sure as how to respond.

"I was forced into the New York invasion." He then said, breaking through the silence in one swing. "My brother doesn't even know the whole truth." He sighed. I glanced to him, his eyes remained forward, face stoic, "Thanos held me for months, training me to lead the Chitauri, though the training was simply torture and mind games."

"You were being controlled by the mind stone too..." I whispered, more to myself, but he had heard it. He looked to me, eyes soft, nodding. "Wow."

"If I didn't, he would have killed me, destroyed the Earth, and Asgard. I couldn't allow for that." He then sighed, sitting back in his chair, "There, I answered one of your questions. But you only get one." I scoffed.

"I tell you how I killed my family, and you think that answering one question makes up for that?" I bit the inside of my cheek, trying to stop my smile as he nodded. "What will it take for you to open up a bit? If we're to go on all of those missions together you're going to have to at some point." I raised my eyebrows, watching as he tapped his chin.

"I'll tell you what, I'll answer one question each time I save your life." He smirked, "I'm sure I'll have answered all of your questions before the summers end."

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trashmenofmarvel · 3 years

Text

Branded - Chapter 34

Pairing: Demon!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You and Bucky head back to New York.

(This is a fan AU of Falling’s Just Another Way to Fly by araniaart . Please check out this incredible series for all of your demon Bucky needs.)

Chapter Warnings: Brief explicit sex, angst, mild anxiety attacks, fluff, dirty jokes

AO3

The shower was not, in fact, faster with the two of you in it.

It started off fine enough, with Bucky helping wash off the drying cum between your legs. Somehow, it escalated with you pressed chest first against the wall, moaning without shame against the tile. Bucky rubbed the tip of his cock between your folds, teasing you, making you beg for it until he pushed forward and slid all the way inside.

Bucky didn’t seem to have any kind of refractory period, and you didn’t either, so he fucked you right there against the wall. Your fingers were flat against the tile, his fingers intertwining with yours as he ground against you, the spray of water making everything wet and slippery and so much more obscene.

It didn’t last much longer than that. As soon as Bucky had one hand delved between your legs, padded finger carefully rubbing against your clit as the other gently cradled your throat, it was over. You came with a cry, knees buckling as your legs went weak. You would have fallen if Bucky hadn’t held you up, giving a strained groan as he spilled into you again.

This time, when he cleaned you, there was no danger of a fourth round. You could barely hold yourself up, leaning against Bucky for support as you floated on a blissful wave of tingly euphoria.

Bucky wasn’t nearly as content. He had that tight frown he wore when he was unhappy, usually at himself, and it didn’t take a genius to figure out why.

“I’m okay,” you mumbled into his shoulder. “Just… tired.”

“Because I drained you dry.”

“I’m anything but dry,” you said, giving the biggest shit-eating grin you could muster.

He sighed, gently scrubbing down the front of your thighs. You shivered appreciatively at the lovely attention.

“I got careless,” he muttered. “Should have stopped after the first time.”

“I’ll just nap on the way back.” You yawned involuntarily. Shit, maybe he had drained you a little too much. Oops. “You were gonna drive anyway, right? Just give me some carbs and I’ll be good as new.”

Bucky grunted but didn’t argue further, ending the argument with a kiss on top of your head. You could get used to resolving arguments this way.

After finishing cleaning up and toweling dry (or rather, Bucky toweled you dry while you hummed drunkenly against his chest), you headed downstairs for a quick breakfast. As suspected, you felt much better after scarfing down a bagel, a bowl of oatmeal, and a plate of pancakes and fruit. If being hungry and tired after sex was the biggest price you had to pay to have Bucky, you were more than willing.

Of course, it wasn’t the biggest price you had to pay, but you didn’t want to think about that whole situation. Being reminded of the fact that if you didn’t have sex with Bucky you’d die a terrible, painful death could really put a damper on your mood. It was a problem for another day, not for right now, when you had to focus on your last meal with the family and pretend you hadn’t just had your brains screwed out by a hot-ass demon.

Before you knew it, you were packed up and out the door, Monster’s carrier cradled in your arms as Bucky got the bags. Your aunt and uncle hugged you both, followed by you mom, squeezing you tightly before letting you go.

“Be safe on the drive. Text me when you get back. I’ll try calling you more, I miss talking to you, sweetie.”

“Me too, Mom,” you said, the guilt hurdling through your body like a ricocheting bullet. She had no idea the kind of danger and trauma you’d been through, and no matter what, you could never tell her. The least you could do was try to be better and contact her more often.

With a warm smile, your mom wrapped her arms around Bucky’s shoulders and gave him a tight squeeze.

“You take care now, Jacob. We loved having you over, so don’t be a stranger.”

“Thank you for having me, ma’am,” he said, flashing a dazzling smile once they pulled apart. “It was a pleasure.”

You mom shot you a knowing smile after Bucky turned around, and you had to fight to not bury your face in your hands. At least she hadn’t said something like ‘oh no, the pleasure’s all my daughter’s.’

Ugh. Family.

You loved coming back home again, but you were also ready to get back to the city. Back to your own place where you could have a bit more privacy. It also meant you had to think about what came next.

The dilemma seemed to weigh heavily on Bucky’s mind as well; after he pulled the car away from the icy curb, he was quiet, but the tension in his jaw spoke volumes. After you were out of the Boston suburbs and on the highway, slower than the speed limit to account for the icy roads, Bucky said, “You can take a nap if you want.”

“I’m okay for now. If you don’t mind the company, that is.”

“I always love having you around.”

And just like that, your face was on fire.

“Bucky.”

“And you’re so cute when you’re flustered, too.”

When you glanced over, sure enough, he was grinning with those perfect white teeth full on display. You wished you had a hoodie to hide in but you’d opted to wear a sweater instead, so you buried your face in your hands.

“You can’t just say things like that.”

“What? That I like spending time with you?” He huffed. “Anyone’s who’s too embarrassed to tell you that stuff doesn’t deserve you.”

Now you were burying your face in your hands and slinking down in the seat.

“Aww c’mon. Is it that bad? Being complimented?”

“I’m just… not used to it, that’s all.”

There was a sudden warm weight on top of your head, fingers moved through your hair, and you instantly melted. Being petted by a demon probably shouldn’t have been so relaxing, but you leaned into his touch and lowered your hands into your lap.

“You really like that?” he asked with a tinge of amusement.

You made a mmhmm sound and closed your eyes, warm and safe. You didn’t want this trip to end, not knowing what came next, but maybe things would be all right.

Maybe because you felt so cozy and content you lost a bit of your filter. Or maybe Bucky’s fingers on your scalp coupled with the lack of sleep made you more open. For whatever reason, you broached the subject you’d both been avoiding since last night.

“It wasn’t that bad, you know,” you mumbled. “Being in that place with you.”

His hand stopped moving. No, you didn’t like that, keep petting me, damn it. But he didn’t, and when he pulled away entirely you nearly whined. It pulled you out of your stupor at least, and Bucky’s tense expression as he stared out the windshield made you regret saying anything at all.

But you had, and it was too late to take it back, so you pressed on.

“Really, it… it felt like a lifetime when I was there, but now it’s just like… a dream. Or fuzzy, like childhood memories. I don’t know how to explain it.”

The only sound between you were tires on the icy road, the hum of the heater, and the windshield wipers thumping back and forth at a regular rhythm.

“You had it worse,” you blurted. Oh, why had you brought it up? You should have at least waited until you got back to the city, not when you were trapped in a car together. “You had to actually live all that stuff.”

“You lived it too.” He was almost too quiet to hear. “You did.”

That was all he said, at least for so long you thought the conversation was officially over. You stared out the passenger window, watching the flakes pound against the glass, when Bucky asked:

“What was it like? Being inside someone’s head?”

Even though his tone was carefully blank, it was a curious question, and you were happy to answer it if it got him talking.

“Kind of… weird? But I got used to it pretty fast. Sometimes I could zone out and not really pay attention to what you were doing. So I could… you know, give you privacy.” Your face grew warmer and you didn’t dare look at him. “And other times, I could be very present and felt what you were feeling. It really wasn’t that bad. Especially when… uh…when I kept you warm, and stuff.”

Yep, your face was on fire again, but it made it all worth it when he gave an amused snort.

“I never did thank you for that. I’m pretty sure I would have froze to death otherwise. And I didn’t even know who you were, or what you were, and I wanted to…”

Wanted to what?

He never said, because the conversation truly died there, and you didn’t have the heart to revive it. Not with the mournful look on his face as he drove.

You propped your arm up on the window and made a pillow out of it, hoping if you took a nap you might be more clear-headed, and if not that, at least you could leave Bucky alone with his thoughts. Worried you’d pushed him too far and too fast, you didn’t think you’d fall asleep, but the thrum of the car engine lulled you into a doze. When next you opened your eyes, the car was stopped, pulled up to a pump at a gas station. The car was still on, the heater keeping the car comfortably warm, but Bucky was nowhere in sight.

Panic shot through you like a thunderbolt, and you shoved open the door, holding on to it as you frantically searched the parking lot. There were people around so you didn’t start yelling for Bucky like a crazy person, but your heart was beating against your ribcage like a trapped animal.

Where could Bucky have gone? Did someone capture him? You didn’t believe he would have left on his own, no way, not after… not after everything that had happened the past few days.

He wouldn’t leave, he wouldn’t leave, he wouldn’t—

“Sweetheart?”

You spun around so hard you nearly lost your footing, but you grabbed the roof of the car and regained your balance. Bucky still gripped you by the shoulder, concern creasing his brows.

“Are you all right? What’s wrong?”

“N-nothing. I just saw you were gone and got worried, that’s all.” And now you also felt like the world’s biggest idiot, or at least the world’s clingiest person.

Bucky released his breath and dropped his hand.

“Jesus, you scared me.”

“I scared you?” You were pretty sure your heart was still beating a mile a minute, and you were definitely still out of breath. “What do you mean I scared you?”

“I was inside paying for gas, and next thing I feel is your terror—I thought someone had attacked you.”

“That’s what I thought had happened to you!”

Bucky sighed and pushed the hair back from his face with a gloved hand, and then gave you an exasperated but fond look.

“You think we’re being a little co-dependent?” you asked, sheepish.

“Sweetheart.” His unfairly sexy mouth quirked as he rolled his eyes. “We’re literally bound by demon magic.”

“Oh. Yeah, good point.”

He kissed you on the top of your head and instantly the tension leeched from your body. Bucky really could play your body like an instrument, couldn’t he.

“Well, now that you’re back,” you said with a wince, “I gotta go pee. And maybe pick up some snacks, I’m still really hungry.”

“That’ll be from the, uh… multiple feedings.” His smile vanished, replaced by concern. “Do you want me to—I should come with you?”

“I think only one of us should be subjected to the horrors of gas station restrooms. Plus, someone needs to stay and watch the child.”

Bucky blinked in confusion and then grimaced. You shook your finger at him.

“Monster is baby, and you keep an eye on him. I’ll be right back,” you added when he switched back into worry-mode. “If I’m in danger, sounds like you’ll know it, yes?”

Bucky grumbled an affirmative, and you turned away. Paused. Turned back around and walked up to him. His eyes widened as you planted a kiss on his cheek, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t intensely pleased with yourself for his reaction.

After you braved the disgusting bathroom and picked up a couple snacks demanded by your rumbling stomach, you paused in front of a humming machine. You stared at the swirling glass in front of you, lost in the memory of a red-washed dune.

You snapped out of it, set down your snacks, and grabbed two huge plastic cups to fill.

By the time you returned outside, the car was fueled and Bucky was leaning against the side with his arms crossed over his chest. To an outsider he would appear calm, but tightness of his shoulders and the fraught lines of his face told you a different story.

Bucky took the overfilling snacks from your arms to your gratitude. He raised an eyebrow at the sheer volume of them, and you shrugged.

“I was hungry. You’re welcome to my snacks, too. Oh, and… I got this for you.”

You held out one of the Big Gulps. The plastic was a solid blue and red, so Bucky couldn’t see what was inside until he looked down the transparent domed lid.

He stared at it. And stared. It was cold enough to snow, and you were sweating.

“I know it’s not… not blueberry-flavored. They don’t really do that anymore, use real ingredients for this kind of junk. But it is blue, and it’s an Icee, so I figured…” Your voice trailed off. Bucky continued to stare.

And then his eyes started to water.

“Oh, no,” you whispered, horrified. “I’m sorry, Bucky, I didn’t mean to—“

Bucky pulled you into a tight embrace. Right there, in the gas station, for all to see.

“I’m the one who’s sorry.” One arm across the back of your shoulders and the other around your waist, he squeezed you, holding you tightly to his chest. “I’m so, so sorry. I don’t understand why it happened. How you got stuck in the demon realm place with me. I didn’t know it was you. I didn’t… I didn’t know… I should have known, but I didn’t, and I’m so sorry.”

“Bucky…” You melted into his hold, kept warm from the biting temperatures. But it didn’t protect you from your guilt of hiding the truth. It wasn’t Bucky’s fault what had happened. You were responsible, even if it had been an accident, but you were too afraid to tell him what the Ancient One had said. You had no idea how he would react, and you wanted to get back to the city before dropping that bomb on him.

“Please don’t apologize,” you said, muffled by his jacket. “I’m fine. It wasn’t that bad on my end. Like I told you, it was kind of like a dream. It’s already faded a little.”

Which was true. Somewhat. There were a few moments that would stick with you for the rest of your life, like the mummified corpse with the sigil on its shoulder. You had no doubt it was a human enslaved to a demon, but what you didn’t know was how they had ended up on that world. It would be the subject of more nightmares, that was for sure.

Not to mention the whole watching Bucky die in front of you thing, but if you thought about that for even a moment you’d probably have a nervous breakdown. The only thing that kept it at bay was the constant reminder that Bucky was alive and well.

All in all, you were coping fairly well, and if anything, you were more worried about Bucky. He’d actually been there physically while you’d only experienced the time-loop through him.

Or… that was your guess, anyway. Who knew how these things worked? Hopefully, the wizards.

“I’m still sorry you had to go through all of that,” he said, warm breath tickling your hair. “If I’d known that was going to happen, I never would have tried to show you those memories.”

You couldn’t reach your arms around him, protectively holding your Icee so he wouldn’t crush it, so you leaned up and kissed his cheek.

“We’re both here and we’re both okay,” you said, “so that’s what I’m going to focus on.”

Bucky had an odd expression. It was part wistful, sad, and something else. You couldn’t figure out what it was before he gave a defeated smile.

“All right, all right.”

“I’m serious, Barnes.” You prodded his chest playfully. “You’ve seen my family. One demon isn’t going to intimidate me. We’ll figure out what happened with the memories, but you are not allowed to blame yourself. I forbid it.”

The strange, sad look vanished, and Bucky released you with one arm, the other kept around your waist. Your skin tingled at the casual touch. Would you ever get used to this?

Bucky stared down at the slushy in suspicion, then he took a cautious sip of the straw and grimaced.

“Jesus. What’s it with people these days and sugar? You tryin’ to give kids diabetes?”

“Oh, my God,” you groaned, and grabbed your snacks. Bucky wasn’t going to get any if he was going to complain about your junk food choices.

“What? It’s a serious question,” he continued as you both got into the car. “It won’t do anything to me, but what about your poor liver?”

“I’m pretty sure my liver is glowing with vitality after all the demon sex I’ve had.”

It took a beat for him to respond. You could practically see the gears turning in his head.

“That.” He turned his head very slowly, and peered at you. “Is not how it works.”

You grinned and slouched back in your seat, sticking your straw in your mouth and slurping as obnoxiously as possible. Bucky shook his head before putting the car into gear, the softness of his smile fading too quickly, and the faint sadness you didn’t like returned.

Next Chapter

#branded #demon!bucky barnes #demon!bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #my fanfiction #my writing

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some-kindofgnome · 4 years

Text

Kinktober #21: Absence: Bucky Barnes

In which you call Bucky while away on a solo mission.

Characters: Bucky Barnes / f!Reader

Warnings: Phone sex, masturbation, shitty motel rooms, mentions of oral sex (f-receiving)

Notes: Not much to say about this one. Today’s prompt was “Phone Sex,” and, well, phone sex is phone sex is phone sex.

Except when it’s with Bucky.

Kinktober Masterlist

You push open the bathroom door and a cloud of shower steam rolls out with you. The exhaust fan’s gone to shit in that shoebox of a bathroom. You should’ve guessed, based on how badly the paint is peeling in there.

The room is about as shitty as they come. But you’re so goddamned tired, you could sleep in a gutter.

This is far better than a gutter.

The springs creak beneath your weight as you flop onto the turned-down bed, hauling your phone above your face. Bucky’s been texting you. You haven’t seen a thing- haven’t even looked at your phone in the last twenty-four hours.

This mission is running you ragged.

It’s your first solo gig, and as thrilled as you are to take on this responsibility, you’re not thrilled to be holing up in some double-digit motel in a drive-through town in the middle of nowhere. Especially since the last few days haven’t come close to bringing you any real action.

There are a couple messages on your phone, but most of them are at least a few hours old. You scroll idly through and reply to a few of them, making a mental note to get back to the others.

But you’re thinking about something else.

It feels like you’re settling in for the first time since you arrived. You have a few open hours ahead of you before you know you need to get to bed. You consider flipping on the T.V. but surfing whatever local channels this place’s shitty cable service will have doesn’t exactly appeal.

Not when you’ve got something far more exciting lined up at your fingertips.

You think about texting him first, but it’s the same time there as it is here and if you know him like you think you do, Bucky’s sprawled out in bed with his own T.V. on and wishing he had something better to do.

The perfect moment for a spontaneous call.

You scroll indulgently to his contact and press the ‘call’ button, lifting the phone to your ear. It rings a few times before he answers.

“Hey.”

His voice is gruff, and you can hear the way he shifts a little as he inevitably props himself on one elbow.

“Hey, hot stuff,” you croon into the phone, adopting your favourite playful-sexy voice. “What’re you wearing right now?”

He chuckles. God, you miss that chuckle. You miss laying on his chest and making him laugh, just to feel the vibration of it beneath you.

“Let’s see,” he rumbles in your ear. “Short skirt, thigh-high socks, and those lacy panties you love so-“

“Very funny,” you quip, smirking to yourself. You roll onto your side, curling up to the sound of his voice. Hearing him when you can’t be there only makes you miss him more.

“I take it things aren’t happening very fast over there.”

“They’re not happening at all,” you reply. “I spent all day squatting in the trees. Nothing. Not a peep.”

“Damn,” he sighs. “It does turn out that way sometimes. I sure hope Steve didn’t send you on a dead trail for your first solo gig.”

“When I left, I honestly hoped it would turn out that way. But now I’m so bored I could die.”

“Anything I can do to entertain you?”

You grin indulgently.

“You could tell me what you’re actually wearing.”

He laughs again. You want to curl your body around the phone and hug it tightly to your chest when he does that. Like you can pretend that some vestige of him will feel how tightly you wish you could be holding him.

“I miss you, baby,” he grunts. “It’s jus’ not the same, goin’ to bed without you.”

“I know,” you croon back.

“What would you do,” you ask before the implication catches up with you, “if I was still there?”

You can hear him hesitate. He trips quietly over his voice, stammering for a moment.

“Well-I…I’m not sure,” he mumbles thoughtfully. “Kiss you, I guess.”

“Where?” Your heart flutters. You’re not ready to admit it, but you’re desperate. This sort of thing’s never really been on the menu before. Sometimes his texts get a little flirty, but… never over the phone.

“Your lips,” he drawls, and you wonder if he’s clued in yet. “Your cheeks. I’d kiss your neck a little, if you’re not too sleepy already.”

“I’m not,” you press. “Not too sleepy. What’s next?”

You roll onto your back, staring up at the ceiling. You’re grinning like an asshole, but this is the most fun you’ve had in a long time.

“Baby, what-“

“Just keep talking,” you breeze, letting your eyes fall shut. He misses you, so he plays along.

“You know how it goes,” he continues. “Kiss on your neck a little. Maybe stop at your collarbone. Pull down your shirt a little, so I can touch your pretty…”

He trails off. Your cheeks are warm. You can’t imagine how red he must be right now. Scratch that. You can. He’s maroon. You adore the thought of it.

“Uh-huh,” you prompt. You slip your palm under your shirt, sliding it through the heat that your t-shirt traps against your shower-warmed skin.

“I’d get my mouth on you,” he growls, deeper now. “Right between your thighs, sweetness. God, I can’t wait to taste you again.”

There’s a strange sort of tightness to his voice. But you’re right there behind him, slipping your fingers into your pajamas and stroking over the swell of your warming folds.

“Eat you out nice and slow,” he continues. You don’t even have to egg him on anymore. You cradle the phone between your ear and the pillow, losing yourself in the baritone of his loving voice.

“Keep going,” you rasp at some point. You know how to touch yourself like clockwork, and you’re working yourself carefully, imagining it’s his coarse hands, his tongue, his body over yours.

“I’d fuck you so good if I was over there right now,” he snarls. “Fuck you ‘till you can’t walk, baby. The second you get home, I’m gonna have you.”

“Bucky,” you warn, low and tight. “Baby, don’t stop.”

“That’s it,” he urges. “That’s right. Imagine taking my cock, sweetness. Take it all for me. Fuck, I can’t hold out. Take my cum, baby, take my whole goddamn load-“

His voice breaks, just as your own climax hits you and you ride it hard. It’s nothing like the edges he’s been able to bring you to, but it’s relief, and when you resurface you can hear him panting softly into the receiver.

“Did you just…?” You trail off, lifting your heavy head.

“Yeah,” he croaks, still breathless. “Yeah, shit. Wish you could see what a mess you made ‘a me.”

You lick your lips, sighing deep to calm your still-racing heart.

“Well,” you offer. “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.”

Just before you hang up, he’s laughing in your ear all over again. And you’re melting right through the phone all over again, too.

“Baby,” he croons, with all the love in the world lacing his voice, “you got yourself a deal.”

#bucky barnes/reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky/reader #bucky barnes/you #bucky barnes #reader insert #kinktober #jbbkinktober2020 #marvel #mcu #mcu fanfiction #marvel kinktober #marvel fanfic #readerfic

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gomustanggirl16 · 3 years

Text

Traitor Cat

Based off this random idea I have that’s a mix of my own two cats, Corona (no we named her after alcohol two years ago but it is a fitting name) and Tanqueray (gin we have a theme). So Tanq is more my cat, she likes cuddles, she likes to sit on my chest and be in my face and does know when I’m not okay and seems to take my anxiety away. Then there’s Corona, my moms cat, who well lets just say I call her a gargoyle because every morning she sits on the end of my moms bed like a gargoyle staring at her in the dark until she gets up.

So that got me thinking of Liho naturally and I had 15 minutes in an MRI machine (it’s fine I’m fine) to think clearly while ignoring the odd bagging against my back that reminded me of a child kicking the back of your seat on an airplane. So here we have Steve meeting Liho for the first time, this takes place right after TWS and this is also one of many forms of the idea and I’ve had wine so bare with me.

It had been long day, hell it had been a long year, Natasha lost her job, her antimony, her apartment, her parents apparently though that had been years ago, and now she was living in Avengers Tower because gaining her aliases back had been harder than ever before and she had started wondering if it was worth trying. But at least she had Liho, stubborn cat she was she’d missed her after leaving her with the Barton’s while she went Russia she’d found she missed the cat and Liho had seemed to miss her to, crying when she went to the farm to pick her up and see the family.

It was late almost midnight, she’d been tracking a shipment of S.H.I.E.L.D. contraband at the docks that led nowhere, yet. Natasha checked Liho’s bowl her dry food touched, but her wet food she’d asked Tony to put out untouched. That was highly unlike her, but she was still getting used to her new surrounds, now that she wasn’t allowed outside she was going a bit stir crazy, having come into her room the other day carrying one of Tony’s socks collapsing on the floor and proceeding to “kill” it like a mouse.

Natasha moved to her room, going through the motions as she got ready for bed collapsing into the oversized bed and abundant pillows Liho loved hiding in, slowly drifting off. Next time Natasha woke partially spreading her legs only to pause realizing Liho wasn’t at her usual spot at the end of the bed. She looked at the clock to see it was almost 2:30am and felt a slight panic pulse through her. Liho always came to bed. Even when Natasha didn’t want her to she’d sit outside the door and scratch and meow until she was let it, but there her door stood ajar and no Liho.

“Liho?” Natasha called out, nothing.

“Liho?” Natasha tried again getting out of bed and going to her door.

She went through the penthouse calling Liho but nothing. No reply. Oh no, Tony had been shocked learning she had a cat, and even more so when she’d asked him to feed her. He owed her that, but he wasn’t used to owning pets let alone Liho who tried escaping out the door every time it opened. oh no.

“J.A.R.V.I.S. are you able to track Liho’s movements?” Natasha asked trying not to think about all the possible ways Liho could be trapped or hurt or...

“Yes, reviewing the Tower’s surveillance it seems she got out when Mr. Stark fed her this evening and made her way into Captain Rogers quarters.”

Oh god...Steve had just gotten back from Spain tracking Bucky. They made plans to have breakfast later this morning. She needed to get Liho back upstairs before she gave poor Steve a heart attack. She quickly made her way out to the elevator and punched the button for Steve’s floor. Just like she knew he would his front door was unlocked, and she quietly made her way into the living room.

“Liho!!” Natasha whispered looking through the space for black ball of fur while trying not to wake the soldier. She went room by room until she reached Steve’s bedroom and her stomach knotted, knowing her cat this would be it, it’s door was cracked and she peaked in.

Sure enough there she was curled up at the end of Steve’s bed sound asleep.

“Traitor.” Liho stirred yawning and stretching with a little meow. “shh, come on.”

Instead of Liho following her Liho made her way further up the bed towards Steve’s sleeping form. Don’t you dare. Natasha moved quickly around the bed quickly snatching up the cat as she was about to climb up onto Steve’s chest. She was about to make it out the door before her foot snagged sending searing pain through her foot and her to the floor.

“F***”

“What the Hell?” Natasha looked up and turned on her back to see Steve rubbing his eyes as he looked down at where she was on the floor.

“Natasha? Are you okay?” He got up realizing what had happened, helping her up off the floor.

“I’m fine, you know you should really keep that thing on the wall or between your night stand and your bed.” She said looking at his shield now laying in the middle of the floor.

“Yeah, wouldn’t want people tripping over it in the middle of the night who weren’t already here when I went to bed. Speaking of, what are you doing in my room?”

Natasha hesitated, her eyes traying just a bit down his bare torso to where his sweats hung low on his hips-

“Nat?”

“Right-shit where’d she go?” Natasha looked around realizing Liho was gone again. She had to be around here somewhere though.

“Where’d who go? Nat are you sure you’re okay? Even for you this is a little strange.” She frowned getting back on the floor to look under his bed.

“Liho!” She hissed but the only thing there was a duffle bag. “You got any lunch meat? Ham preferably. She doesn’t like cold chicken.”

“There’s a sandwich in the fridge...” Steve replied now more confused than ever. I mean he did wake up to her in her pajamas tripping as she tried to make her escape from his bed room.

She made it to the fridge her foot still stung but she pushed it away as she opened his fridge.

“Nat why don’t you sit down let me take a look at your foot.” Steve tried to insist as he came out putting on a zip up.

She found the remaining hoggie in the fridge and sat down on the stool at the island as Steve went through the freezer for an ice pack,

“Liho, momma’s got ham!” She heard Liho’s distinct chirp before the cat jumped sliding across the counter to get her treat.

She watched Steve jump looking back in the direction Liho had come from then to Liho her self as she tore the thin slices of ham up into smaller bites for Liho. Poor thing was starving.

“Where-whose cat is this?” Steve asked dumbfounded as Liho devoured the ham from his sandwich.

“Steve meet Liho, my traitor cat.” Liho slept with no one not even the Barton kids but her and she was incredibly picky, yet here she was, cozy as could be with Steve.

“Why were you and Liho in my bedroom?” Steve asked again as Liho went over to him head butting his stomach to get him to pet her.

“Because I asked Tony to put some wet food out for her while I was working and he let her get out. I told him she’s sneaky and can’t be trusted, but she still got out. I didn’t noticed until half an hour ago when I woke up and she wasn’t in bed. J.A.R.V.I.S. was the one who told me she’d made it in here. Not sure how long but I found her sleeping on your bed with you and not me.”

Liho seemed completely un-phased as she started purring as Steve paid her attention.

“Probably should have realized there was something in my bed, but Sam and I spent the last three days wide awake and I crashed.” He did look tired really tired.

“I know, I’m sorry I woke you, but she was about to use you as a bed and she likes to lay across your neck until you can’t breathe.” He frowned looking at the cat that was now propping herself up on his chest trying to paw at his face to get his attention back on her.

“So it’s true what they say, pets are their owners.”

“I resent that, I don’t own her, we live together.” Had for two years now.

“That why you refer to yourself as her mother?”

“Oh so you’re cheeky when your half asleep huh?” Truth was it was Clint who started that and it just snuck into her vocabulary.

“So you say. How come I never knew you had a cat?”

“There was no reason to tell you.”

“How did you manage that you were gone so much?”

“Oh Nick would watch her for me.” Steve raised an eyebrow at that and she laughed, “Don’t tell him I told you, but he is quite the cat person, has one himself, used to follow him around hang out at S.H.I.E.L.D. but she passed away a few years ago, so you wouldn’t have seen her.”

“Well alright then. Say what does Liho mean? It’s Russian but I don’t think I’ve heard it.”

“The embodiment of evil fate and misfortune.”

“That’s a terrible name for a cat.”

“Its supposed to be ironic, she’s been everything but for me. I can shut everyone out, but she still wiggles her way in. There are days where I can’t get out of bed, and if I have nowhere to be, I had no reason to, but she won’t let me. She cries and won’t leave me be until I get up, even runs to the shower because she likes to play with the water left in the tub and if I turn it on, I’m not going to waste water. Granted most people think that’s just her hungry and wanting to make a mess, but she’s been my reason for getting up now more than ever. God I felt so scared when I realized she was gone, and a little betrayed. I’m sorry I have no idea why I just told you all of that.”

She looked away from him then playing with Liho’s tail to get her attention.

“You know if I stop looking for him-for Bucky I sometimes think I might go insane. Nat we just destroyed the one infrastructure we had...animals know this.”

“Yeah they do. Last time I leave her with Tony.”

Steve laughed a little shaking his head.

“Not to speak i’ll of the man currently housing us for free, but he can barely feed himself Nat.”

“Yeah, I mean he did what I asked, he just underestimated her willingness to go outside.” Steve smiled at her giving Liho one last pet.

“So, we still on for Breakfast? I know it’s three am now, but I don’t know about you but I’m not going back to sleep.”

“I could go for something to eat, let me cook, I was going to already, but now I think I really should since I woke you up by breaking into your bedroom.”

“Sounds good to me. Come on Liho,” Steve picked her up and Liho settled into his arms like a ragdoll.

Natasha would later recall that as the night she started to fall for him, the way Liho reacted to him, like she was telling her Steve was it, he was the one.

#romanogers #mg writes #steve rogers #natasha romanoff #liho the cat

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arandompostarchive · 3 years

Text

Inure - Ch. 1

SAVED WORK

Summary: To some, The Specter is a serial killer. To some, a hero. But to everyone, you were entirely a mystery. You had no history, just a list of victims a mile long. No matter how many people searched your name, they could find anything. If only they had the spelling right. Now, you’ve come across some unfortunate information that drives you out of your usual shadows and into the path of the Avengers. Including two of the more reclusive members of the team. And it’s hard to pick only one of them.

***

The man ran through the hall, his footsteps echoing throughout his house. He tried to navigate the dark halls, too scared to turn on lights or stop and think. He turned every so often, hoping your figure wasn’t behind him anymore. But it always was. He was panicking, you could tell. He could feel sweat stick to the inside of his white button down and the creases of the dress pants he had yet to take off.

He tried to avoid the small side tables and expensive foreign vases that lined his hall. He had managed to trip over a few tables though, knocking the glass onto his floor, shattering it. Each time he’d whisper a soft curse. There was glass beneath your shoes that probably cost millions of dollars. You found it funny. Even now, running for his life, money was still at the back of his mind.

He ran into the next room he saw, his office. A closed off space with nowhere to run. He turned around, looking at each wall. You could hear a string of curses fall from his mouth before he turned to you.

His small study still had a lamp on, the room dimly lit with the yellow-tinted light.

“Please, what do you want? Money? I can do that. Hell, I can get you your own house! I’ve got connections. I can find people for you! Other people! Please, don’t.”

Now, most people would feel bad about this. Chasing a man through his own home with certain ill intention. But you had seen his life. You’d seen what he does to people. He’d tear apart families, kidnapping people and selling any drug he could find. His hands were soaked in blood, something you could understand. But while you had killed, you picked your victims well. They were the most guilty people you could find. Murderers, kidnappers, kingpins, anyone who managed to escape justice.

Some called you a serial killer, a term that wasn’t exactly incorrect. Some thought you were a vigilante, which also wasn’t wrong. But no matter what, everyone was silently grateful for everything you did.

You always found a new target. From whispers on the street, other criminals, cops who needed a break, sometimes Nick Fury himself would send you a case file or two. You had seen it all, people with souls blacker than night. And this man was no different.

“I don’t want money, Laurence. You’ve killed innocents. You’ve let people die. You’ve heard them beg for mercy and have granted none. Why would I give you a luxury you haven’t given any of your victims?”

The man stuttered. His eyes darted around, frantically trying to find something. Maybe a weapon or just an idea of how to get out of this mess. He suddenly spoke, his voice shaking and cracking. “Because I have information! There’s this man who’s building some huge weapon. Probably wants to take New York out. He could start wars with this thing, yeah? It’ll kill millions in a heartbeat. I know what he’s got! I know what he’s doing, I’ve met the guy! I’ll tell you everything.” He spoke quickly, hoping to finish before you decided to end him. “But not if I’m dead.”

You scoffed. “Tell me, why on Earth would I accept the pleas of a dead man?” You asked. It was a real question, despite your sarcastic tone.

“I’ve got the info! He was chatting with some friends of mine, gave ‘em a whole file about it.” He reached toward the desk and pulled a file off of it, showing it to you. It read “SPECTR2” on the front in small, black script. Your eyes widened and you grabbed the file from him.

He watched as you read over it and confirmed his theory. He was right. Whoever this man was, he had the real thing.

“Alright, fine.” You said, accepting his offer.

“Oh thank god! I knew you’d be reasonable, you’re all about ‘the greater good’, yeah? I’ll tell you whatever you want, lady.” He said, relief washing over his features.

You smiled. “Yeah.” You held the file at your side. “Thing is, I know all about this project already. I don’t need you.”

The panic quickly spread across his face again and he racked his brain for something else. “C’mon, don’t I get something here?” He said, glancing at the walls to find some kind of weapon.

You sighed. “Fine. I’ll make your death quick.” You said, taking out one of your swords. He only had a minute to react before he was already dead. You had gotten used to the sight of death, though it wasn’t your favorite thing, there was something satisfying about knowing you had avenged people in some way.

His blood had already stained the carpet he had surrounding his desk and leaked along the cracks of the wooden floor. You groaned at the thought of cleaning your shoes after this and sat down at his desk chair, looking for any other info on the man starting up Project SPECTR again.

***

“So you want us to team up with some psycho killer?” Tony said, leaning back in his usual chair. The meeting room was packed, each member of the team, and some newer additions, crowded together at one table with Steve stationed at the front.

“She has information, Tony. She says lives are in danger.” Tony looked at him ridiculously.

“I’ve got my share of psycho’s on this team and now we’re working with another?” Tony gestured to Bucky and Loki’s side of the table. He got a glare from Nat and he only shrugged his shoulders in response. “Her terms are insane! She wants immunity for every crime she’s done or ever will do. That doesn’t sound insane to you? What if she’s got some master plan and we won’t be able to arrest her for it?”

Nat looked between Steve and Tony. It was obvious they weren’t getting anywhere.

“She’s got info we need. If she wanted to enact some ‘master plan’ she’d just use whatever death machine she’s got, not tell us about it. If she’s serious, we’ll hold up our end. If she’s messing with us, we won’t and we’ll lock her up on site. But if she’s really found plans for what could be the world’s next terrorist attack, we at least need to see her proof.”

Tony looked to Nat, “She’s basically holding the world hostage! Either she gets to do whatever the fuck she wants or everyone dies. We’re really letting that slide?”

This time Steve spoke, though he glared at Tony a bit for his cursing. “I didn’t say I liked it. She’s put us in a tough situation. And Nat’s right. If she’s lying in any way, we’ll lock her up. We’ve got to living lie detectors at this table.” He gestured to Loki on one side of the table and Wanda on the other. Tony only rolled his eyes, silently accepting the argument.

“Are we sure about this? I mean, if she’s telling the truth, then we’ve got some sociopath with a death ray somewhere. But what if she’s lying? She’ll be in the compound. Even if we can lock her up, what if we aren’t able to before she accomplishes whatever task she’s trying to?” Sam said as soon as the room had quieted a bit. A few team members nodded along, considering the possibility.

“We have to take that risk.” Steve said.

***

You strode into the Avengers’ compound, appreciating the space. It was larger than what you were used to. You had jumped from house to house, staying away from law enforcement. If all went well though, you wouldn’t have to worry about that anymore.

There were a few Avengers there to greet you. You had recognized them from the news and you were interested in seeing Natasha here. Among them, you saw Tony Stark. You’d recognize him a mile away. He looked different from his father, though he had the same sarcastic look on his face. You considered punching him now, maybe giving him a serious injury. But, sadly, there really were lives at stake.

Captain America stepped closer to you, holding out his hand. You took it hesitantly, the gloves of your suit meeting his hands. You appreciated the hood of your outfit now with the light reflecting off of windows and into your eyes. It was at least a little bit of protection.

“Specter. Good to meet you. I’m Captain Rogers, just call me Steve.” The other Avengers stepped to his side, making you slightly uncomfortable with how close they were. You couldn’t show it though. You had to be steeled, show no fear. Especially since you were in the lion’s den.

“This is Natasha, Tony, and Thor. We’ve got a meeting room just this way.” He got straight to business and began leading you away. You were careful to let the four Avengers go in front of you, and you were certain at least Natasha had noticed this action. Tony kept glancing back to you, slightly nervous. You could accept that. You felt nervous too, though you had gotten good at concealing your nerves, even before you had ‘died’.

You entered the room which had all of the other Avengers in it as well as five empty chairs. You were seated at the end, directly next to Natasha. Steve settled himself in the end chair right next to you. You looked at the rest of the group who were all doing a terrible job of pretending not to stare at you.

“Alright, Specter. Should we call you Specter?” You nodded, letting Steve continue. “Your conditions are questionable to say the least. We need to figure out if you’re actually telling the truth about this weapon first.”

“That’s fine,” you began, “I’d do the same.” You opened up your file, noting how there was a small camera above you, casting a picture of the file onto a board at the front of the room. You smiled at the innovation, curious about how exactly it worked. It had been a while since you’d gotten to appreciate technology, and where better than the home of a Stark.

“This is a real file. I worked on this project years ago. It was meant to help heal people. Stitch them back together, even when they were on the brink of death. But it malfunctioned. I can tell you this is real. Check any references you like, though it’ll be hard to get your hands on. We never made digital copies, this is our original paper.”

Tony squinted at the paper, seeming confused by it.

“And by we, you mean…?” Another man trailed off. You recognized him as Hawkeye, though you hadn’t memorized their actual names.

“Me and Howard Stark. We worked on it back during the war, it was like our pet project.” Tony seemed less confused now.

“That was over half a century ago. How exactly are you standing here?” You sighed at Hawkeye’s question.

“It’s a rather long and annoying story. Let’s keep it simple and say I’ve effectively scared off death.”

“Guys,” Tony said, still looking at the projection of the file. The room turned to him and you were thankful for whatever subject change he had to offer. “I’d love to say she’s full of it, but I know my father’s handwriting. That’s his signature too at the bottom.” As he pointed the small camera zoomed in. You’d have to ask him about the technology’s design later. Assuming this actually went well. You slightly cringed at the thought of speaking to a Stark again, but you’d manage for the sake of a new discovery. “Hey, Friday?”

“Yes Boss?”

You heard a woman’s voice in the room that didn’t belong to anyone present. You quickly figured out it was an AI system Stark had made.

“How well does that match Howard’s handwriting?”

There was a beat of silence before the AI, Friday, spoke again.

“It’s a perfect match.”

The team didn’t seem to know if that was good or bad.

“So there’s really someone set on ending humanity?” A man said across the table. You remembered his moniker being something bird themed, like Hawkeye’s, but it wasn’t coming to you.

“Believe me, I wouldn’t be anywhere near this place unless absolutely necessary,” You said. The Captain glanced around the table and the group seemed to silently make their decision.

“Alright. We’ll meet your terms, but understand that you must stay here through his whole process. No ‘missions’ of your own.” You thought over his offer. It was slightly tempting. Though you’d miss your little hunt for criminals, it would be nice to have a house for longer than a week.

“Fine. But you can’t bind my powers or spy on me or some bullshit.” The Captain nodded, agreeing.

Suddenly, you were a temporary Avenger.

***

“I don’t like her. She’s too calm. We’re facing a giant death machine and she’s completely stone faced.” You could overhear the conversation from where you stood outside the Avengers common area. Natasha had offered to show you around and you had denied, instead accepting a map and list of locations you’d be interested in.

They were sitting around in a circle of couches, all facing each other. Some of the members seemed distracted. Like one with long hair who was slowly stroking the spine of a book he carried in his hands and another with a striking metal arm. You had to admit, the team was certainly good-looking.

You continued to listen to the conversation, though you had lost a bit of the argument when you retreated into your thoughts.

“What can we do? I’m hardly happy about this, but she’s holding the world hostage, like you said. Millions might die if he didn’t have that info.”

“And what, we’re trusting a serial killer? She’s murdered who know’s how many people and we’re supposed to just sit here and fucking sing Kumbaya?!” Tony said. You could see his point. You wouldn’t trust you either.

“Many of us have killed.” Loki said, offering some perspective and hoping someone else would continue his point. He was still on ‘house-arrest’ and was hardly considered trustworthy. Stark wouldn’t listen no matter how silver his tongue was. But the others seemed to at least consider his words with the exception of Hawkeye who seemed upset that he even had to hear Loki’s voice.

“He’s right Stark. I’d hardly say my hands are clear, but here I am.” Natasha added, taking up Loki’s silent offer to continue his argument.

“I’m not okay with this. She’s absolutely mental. I can’t find anything on her besides media speculation. SHIELD didn’t have anything on her, despite the fact that she’s a well-known criminal and she’s got no history. No names attached, nothing. Just media speculation which is all made up. I checked.”

You took this time to walk out from the hall, the click of your shoes making the group look up. “It’s because you have the spelling wrong.” The entire team looked nervous at being caught. “Don’t feel bad. Of course you’d talk about me, I’m a stranger in your midst.” That seemed to calm some of them down, though they still looked wary of you. Stark was the first to speak.

“We’ve got the spelling wrong?” He asked.

“I’d expect so. You’re spelling my name as ‘Specter’, a ghost, like the media does. Try S-P-E-C-T-R, you’ll find a little more.” You before turning and walking out of the room. While you weren’t excited about opening up your backstory, it’d make this whole ‘trust’ thing a lot quicker. And if you were going to get anywhere, there’d need to be some sort of trust.

***

Project SPECTR - August, 1940

Howard Stark and Dr. Y/n L/n began SPECTR in August of 1940 and have been working on it for three years now.

It’s expected to help Allies win the war, though Dr. L/n believes it could— and should— be used for other purposes. There have been several malfunctions so far and I am unsure how they will continue. Stark has been promoting the idea among generals and strategists, despite the lack of finished product. Dr. L/n suspects it will not be finished by the time Stark suggests, in two weeks. She has told various generals not to expect anything in two weeks, though all generals seem to unfortunately favor Stark’s estimates. They plan to run a test run in one week and fully activate the machine. Both Stark and Dr. L/n hope it will be completely stable for at least ten minutes.

There was a messy signature at the bottom, though Steve identified it quickly as ‘Margaret Carter’.

They read through a few other files, and learned more about the original project. Reportedly, there was a severe malfunction, resulting in Dr. L/n’s death. Peggy had shut down the project immediately after, despite Howard’s begging that it would still work. There had apparently been a rift in their friendship over Dr. L/n’s death.

It also said that the Doctor’s body had disappeared in 1992, only weeks after Howard’s death, which had sparked a few conspiracy theories for those aware of her connection to Stark and Carter, two famous names. She was a leading scientist and was making seriously impressive strides. Stark was disappointed she had died so soon. He couldn’t help but wonder what she would’ve done.

“Is that Specter?” Sam asked about the Doctor working on the project. Though the team seemed unsure of the answer, Steve responded.

“It must be. Why else would she draw our attention to this. She’s got personal experience with whoever is trying to restart the project, though I’m not entirely certain why a machine to heal people will be turned into a new weapon.”

The team tossed theories back and forth and you listened in, smiling when a few of them guessed right. You slipped away soon after though, heading down the hall to the training room.

#loki x reader #loki #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #loki x reader x bucky #inure #saved work #fanfic

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siberianoverture · 3 years

Text

Don’t You Know - 3

A/N: Hi! I realized I should probably specify when the fic happens, sorry! It all happens a year after Endgame, 2024. I spared Tony, I like the theory that if everyone on the battlefield touched each other the energy would be dispersed, Steve returns the stones and comes back because Peggy Carter moved on, and Natasha comes back. Hope my forgetfulness didn’t cause too much confusion. English is not my first language and although I am pretty confident in it I know I make some mistakes. If you happen to find them please let me know! If you want to be added to taglist let me know! Enjoy!

previous: CHAPTER 2

When Sam came into his friend's room to propose a trip to the city for lunch, he found him standing in the middle of the floor staring at the wall above his desk.

"Buc-" he stops when he follows Bucky's gaze, "what's all this?"

There are two pages ripped from a notepad taped there, both with big black letters in Bucky's neat handwriting. First read 'a girl', second 'forgetting'.

Bucky doesn't look at him, clearly deep in thought, so Sam steps in front of him forcing the super soldier to look at him. Bucky lowers his eyes and steps back until he is sitting on his bed.

"What's going on?" Sam asks again turning slightly to take another look at the wall.

"I can't remember her," Bucky says still looking at his shoes, "there's a girl that worked with Winter Soldier, but I don't remember."

"Maybe it was one mission only so there's nothing to remember," Sam tries but Bucky shakes his head.

"I would remember, I remember everything he saw. There is a person-shaped hole in my memories. Like someone took an eraser and wiped her away."

"I thought they took down all Hydra barriers," Sam begins and Bucky looks up at him, "Oh, you don't think it was done by Hydra. Like a superpower?” Bucky nods, “How do you know it's a girl anyway?"

"Natasha, she said there was a rumor of a girl working with Soldier. She thinks it's her, but I don't think so. Nobody would've called her that, everyone would just say Black Widow. Also, it became quite known we had missions together. It just doesn't add up but if anyone knew it would be her, so I don't really know where to look," Bucky explains starting to ramble a bit so Sam sits down next to him and places a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"Hey, calm down. We'll figure it out."

A month passed and they had found nothing.

Bucky had a new routine now: run, breakfast, look for something, lunch, look for something, dinner, look for something until he passed out, rarely in his bed, usually on the floor next to it. This changed only on mission days, if there is a slight chance that he could find something more about her, he goes. The team doesn't ask.

He hadn't told anyone what he was doing, trying to protect himself from everyone's pity, it was Hydra after all. He knew that she might be dead already. It did not stop him, the weird dreams and memories he couldn't catch fueling him. Also, for some reason, he did not want Steve knowing.

Sam is with him whenever he can, sometimes reading some files but usually just keeping him company. With Bucky running after ghosts and assumptions there was little he could help with besides standing next to his friend when mission reports bring back dark memories.

"Sam Wilson came back from his mission and is heading to your room, Sergeant," Friday informed tearing him away from reading through old files for what felt like the hundredth time. Sure enough, Sam was soon walking through his door, still in his suit with an old looking manila folder and throwing it to Bucky.

First, there was a list of Inhumans with their photos and their abilities. At the top there was a boy, no older than fifteen, and there was one word in the abilities column: FORGETTABLE. Bucky looked back at Sam.

"I know it's a boy but, remember, there was a series of experiments where they tried to transfer powers," Sam turned the pages, " there was one page missing and here it is. There was one success, and it was a girl." Sam points to the bottom of the page. FEMALE, 737079, 18, SUCCESS. He flips a few more pages. "She survived because they gave her the serum."

"That's impossible," Bucky shakes his head, "There were five bags, they made five Soldiers."

"True, but all of them were different. They had to adjust the dosage or they would kill them. Maybe they had a bit left and used it on her. It wouldn’t be enough to make a new soldier, but to strengthen her enough to survive however they transferred the powers to her."

"If she was forgettable she would be the best spy Hydra had. That is why she's not in any reports, she would do her job, report to whoever, and everybody involved would forget she was even there," Bucky is overwhelmed. He walks to the window and looks out, "If we worked together I have to look through missions that had more than one objective. Killing for me, information for her. She could be still there."

"Yeah," Sam sighs, "Too bad we don't have a photo."

Somehow Bucky is sure he would recognize her.

He starts looking immediately and he finds quite a few matching his criteria. Next day something pushes him to look through recordings from 2014, his last moments as Winter Soldier and everything plays like he remembered, until, late in the evening, he switches to a view from CCTV near the highway with a clear view of him looking for Natasha, her shooting him, him ducking and then when he and men beside him stand up, there's one more person he doesn't remember being there. It's a woman, in suit that almost exactly matches his, only differce is both her arms being covered. She’s head shorter than him, with hair pulled away from her face. He says something to her, she nods and runs away, and he jumps down the bridge.

He stands up from his computer and stretches. Then he calls for Sam and shows him the video.

"At least she doesn't seem to have any metal limbs," he tries to joke but neither laugh, "If she looks like you does it mean she comes with a handy little manual too?"

"Yeah, she might. We should check the place you got the folder from out again."

They walk out arm in arm and head to the hangar. It's dark outside but Sam knows Bucky won't be able to wait for the morning to come.

When they land near the base, system informs them of a car heading in their direction. Obviously Hydra as the base lays in the middle of nowhere.

"I have a strange feeling they are after the same thing we are," Sam mutters turning on the Quinjet's cloaking.

"It means we're in the right place," Bucky answers and leaves the plane.

"Do you know where to go?"

Bucky doesn't answer and enters the base leaving his friend no choice but to follow. He moves with confidence that makes Sam realize he had already been there at some point in his life. They find the elevator and Bucky presses 737079 into the keyboard and it moves.

"It's the number next to-" Sam begins but he's interrupted.

"It translates to 'spy' from hexadecimal."

The door opens to a room with the same machinery Sam saw in Winter Soldier's files. His eyes follow Bucky noticing how tense his friend is when he marches to one of the cabinets with the last century looking hand scanner on its side.

Bucky glances over his shoulder at Sam, his eyes filled with sadness, anger, and a bit of fear. Then he places his hand at the scanner. It shines green and the cabinet opens with a hiss. Inside is a folder, bound in black leather with a red star on it. Inverted image of a book that controlled The Soldier. Bucky feels sick.

Sam grabs the book and drags him back to the elevator, pushing the button for the ground floor and he can't help but ask.

"How did you know?"

"I just did," Bucky rests his forehead on a cold wall and tries to calm himself, "It's like muscle memory."

They run back to Quinjet and see Hydra soldiers entering the base when they fly back home.

It is nearly midnight when they land and walk back to Bucky's room. He sits down on his bed, a manual folder in his hand and Sam leans on the desk with his arms crossed. They share a look and Bucky finally starts reading.

"There's no name, just the number again. Born in 1973, obtained in 1990. She was seventeen," he looks up at Sam but can't read his expression, "Trained in espionage, injected with serum in 1991. Makes it possible to take powers from injected Inhuman's blood serum. One injection lasts two hours, max three types can be mixed, max five of each. There are words to put in Soldier mode-" Sam interrupts him.

"Same as yours?"

"No," he reads them with an uneasy feeling, "Seek, bullet, lucid, seven, reflect, set, moon, ten, acid, tenet.” “They are in English,” Sam notices.

“Someone else worked on her programming. All other soldiers were programmed in Russian, native language of person doing the conditioning," He needs to really control himself not to punch anything when he reads next few sentences, "After depletion subject experiences psychosis and should be confined posing threat to itself and others. It is advised to put the subject immediately after calming in cryo-chamber. It is no longer in Winter Soldier mode. It is advised to wipe before mission opposed to after."

His vision goes dark when he glances at the next point and he has to put the folder away. Deep down he expected what he saw but this doesn’t lessen the pain that comes with it. He stumbles into the bathroom and splashes his face with ice-cold water. Sam follows and when Bucky turns off the sink sits him on the edge of the bathtub.

"What does it say?" He asks after Bucky's breathing calms.

"I was her handler."

next: CHAPTER 4

#Bucky Barnes #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky imagine #bucky barnes fic #bucky x y/n #bucky x reader #bucky x you #reader insert #Don'tYouKnow

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