#Loki is messed up already and he’s ignoring to focus on Asgard and Thor and their father but Thor isn’t meant to be a single shade wrong | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

alirhi · 3 years

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Loki ranting

Okay. I had this thought in my head of like just compiling links of all the Loki shit I've posted/reblogged so far so that when I get into a conversation about the show and how it fucking disgusted me, I can just be like "here. here's this masterlist post, go read all this shit. This is my entire argument, and not only mine, but a lot of stuff posted by people far more intelligent and level-headed and eloquent than I am, whom I happen to agree with." Because the alternative is constantly getting fired up all over again, and that is exhausting.

BUT! I'm stupid and don't know how tumblr works. Apparently I can't just be like "give me all the Loki-tagged shit I've got" I can only search all the Loki-tagged shit on all of tumblr. And I'm not scrolling back through all of my posts. I talk too fucking much for that shit 😂

So, I'll try to remember all of my grievances with how the MCU has treated Loki, and all of the excellent posts made by other, equally upset fans, and put it all together here under this nice, neat little cut for everyone else's sanity and scrolling convenience...

For people who actually read my shit fairly regularly - bless you, you crazy, patient people. I love you! - this is going to be a lot of repetition of shit you've already read. Probably at least twice. I'm passionate and I have a terrible memory lol. Sorry.

Anyway, first, for those who don't know me and haven't been following my explosions of rage for the past couple of months, some quick background: I do not read comic books, so Loki's Marvel comic canon means nothing to me. I know almost nothing about it. The reason I'm so in love with the character in the MCU is because I am an eclectic witch and the deity I've actively loved and worshiped the longest in my life (literally for as long as I can remember) is Loki. So when he was mentioned in The Mask, I squeed. When they named Matt Damon's character after him in Dogma, I cheered.

When Thor came out in 2011, I just about died from happiness. I was hungry for any representation of this underappreciated god, no matter what it was. I didn't even bitch about how underpowered he was, because at least he was there. But I'm getting slightly ahead of myself.

I can hear anyone reading this going "Why Loki? Isn't he, like, evil? Like basically the Norse version of The Devil?" Because I heard all this shit irl all the fucking time. And no. So let me give you a quick rundown of who Loki actually is.

Loki is a Trickster God. He's often referred to as the God of Mischief. He is not and never was evil, simply chaotic and hedonistic. Loki Laufeyjarson was the son of Laufey (that's mama; they changed her to a man for some reason in the movie) and Fárbauti. Right from the start, from his name, we get a sign of how Loki goes against traditional norms of the time, because in Norse culture, families were patrilineal, and surnames were "son/daughter of father" (which would have made him Loki Fárbautitason), not the mother. But Loki's surname is matrilineal. Feminist icon woo! lol

Though he's a Jotunn, Loki is counted among the Gods (Aesir) in Norse tradition. Depending on his mood, he is alternately helpful or disruptive to the other Gods. I'm not gonna sit and teach a whole text class on him lol but I'll use my favorite example of Misunderstood Loki - the conception of Sleipnir!

So, get this shit. This is also part of why I DO NOT follow Odin and never fucking will (a very small part, but still part of the reason). So, the other Norse Gods are petty motherfuckers, and they wanted some shit built but didn't want to pay the dude doing the building. So they were like "okay, if you can get it done in X amount of time, we'll pay you, but if you can't manage it NO MATTER WHAT, this whole thing is free." And they made sure he had NO help, nothing but him, his materials, and his Very Good Horsey. And this guy and his horse were fucking BAMFs. So it was looking like he was definitely gonna get it done in time, and Odin was like "nah, fuck that shit. I'm cheap." and so he sent Loki to distract the work horse. Loki transformed into a mare and lured the horse away, got fucked, got pregnant, gave birth to the 8-legged (for some reason) horse Sleipnir. Odin rides Loki's son into battle. Um. Kay.

So Loki helped Odin be a petty mf, and Odin got himself a new pet out of the deal.

Oh, also, because he's smart af and a shapeshifter and a master magician and genderfluid, Loki "fails" to fit the super fucking toxic and narrow Norse/Aesir view of "a real man". He prefers intelligence and manipulation to solve problems rather than violence, he's not afraid to behave like a clown if it gets shit done, and that grosses the Aesir out, so they constantly ridicule him for being "less than a man".

Loki is the God of the outcast and the misunderstood. The marginalized people from all walks of life. He is the God of the LGBT community. In modern terms, he's pansexual, polyamorous (married to Sigyn and they are deeply in love, but boy gets around and I've never seen any indication that Sigyn gives a shit) and genderfluid.

Okay. Focus, Ali. This is part of why I usually post multiple rants instead of one big long one XD The longer I ramble, the more I get sidetracked and forget the original point.

So. Loki's awesome, and being a Trickster, is powerful as all fucking hell. There's not much he can't do.

And now we come to Thor (the movie, not the deity). Loki's there! 24-year-old Ali is spazzing! All is right with the world!

Oh lord, they've actually done him justice?! Amazing! He's complex and nuanced and emotional, just like the real Loki! I loved this movie. Loved. It. The climactic thing with trying to blow up Jotunheim never really made much sense to me until someone made an excellent point the other day about Loki being raised in a racist society that was racist against his own race, he just didn't know it yet, poor child. Baby Thor was never corrected when he pledged to commit mass genocide, so Baby Loki probably absorbed the lesson then that Jotunns=evil and killing them all will win his father's love. Anyway, 2011 Loki was a beautiful, heartbreaking portrayal of the God I've loved all my life and spent 24 years longing to see depicted on the big screen.

Then The Avengers happened. And I saw another Loki very close to Norse mythology - mainly, how he's treated. In the beginning of the movie, he's sick, exhausted, and in pain. He can hardly stand, he stumbles and needs help when he walks. He was very obviously tortured, and the sickly blue light of the scepter's control is in his eyes. That gets less and less pronounced as the movie goes on, showing Loki working his way free of it, but in the beginning, he's a mess. Because he was tortured and used by Thanos. Marvel directly confirmed this, and that he was under the scepter's/Mind Stone's control. Loki's actions are not his own in The Avengers. He's under both threat and Thanos' direct control. The movie actually shows The Other directly threatening him to keep him on task, because this is not Loki's plan. It is not what he wants. He's being used and villainized... Just like in real life. It hurt to see this done to him, but the accuracy was too beautiful to ignore.

Thor: The Dark World comes out. I've heard people complain that this movie is the weak link in the Thor trilogy. I disagree. I think that's Ragnarok, for a bunch of reasons, but we'll get there. (And for the record, I loved Ragnarok, too. It was a funny movie. Infinity War and the Disney+ series are the only portrayals of Loki in the MCU that I truly fucking hated.) Anyway, good, fun movie. Had its faults, as all movies do, but it still followed Loki's real-life arc in a way. How? By having Loki dragged back to Asgard in chains and imprisoned underground. Again, not super happy that this happened to my love, and having to see it on screen was painful, but at least in the MCU he's not chained to a rock with venom dripping on his face for eternity, so there's that. (poor Sigyn. how tired do her arms get, holding up that bowl? best wife ever, amirite?)

In TDW, we're shown Loki's love for Frigga, who favored him and taught him magic as a child. We see his bravado; his attempts to mask his true feelings, especially grief. We see him slowly coming back to himself after the events of The Avengers, and slowly mending his relationship with his brother. He accepts that Odin will likely never love him, but Thor just might, because they were close when they were young. "I didn't do it for him." No, no my sweet, you did it for your brother, and a little out of guilt for what happened to your mother.

At the end, Loki fakes his death and escapes, taking the throne, and I have mixed feelings about this. Not the writer's choices here; I love that completely! A natural progression in Loki's story. But my joy is tainted by how closely they're following the Eddas now. Because Loki's escape from his prison heralds the beginning of Ragnarok. And Loki will die in Ragnarok. I don't want to see that play out in front of my face. I won't be able to handle the grief (spoiler alert! IW broke me. I almost walked out of the theater. Loki's death was legitimately fucking traumatic for me. I don't even care how pathetic that is. That grief was real, it was intense, and I still shake and cry when I think about it.)

Marvel announces that Thor 3 will be called Ragnarok. The internet treats this as a shocking revelation. I roll my eyes and mumble "duh" to myself and move on XD

Then they say Ragnarok will be a buddy comedy. I throw up a little in my mouth and no longer want to live on this planet. If they're going to make something called Ragnarok, could they at least treat it with even a fraction of the respect they've shown these characters thusfar? Jfc. I mean, I'll see it anyway, because I'm a whore for Tom Hiddleston lol. But come on, people!

I hated that they made Hel the long-lost older sister and Fenrir her fucking pet/attack dog. Those are my favorites of Loki's children! Hel is such an incredible badass that the early Christians named their dimension of eternal torture after her! They were terrified of her, to the point of naming the place that terrified them most after her. That's awesome! And Fenrir's just the best. I love wolves. Those two details, and Odin's retcon of "we're not Gods! ...lol, except your sister. she's totally a Goddess. and def gonna kill literally everything, so... good luck! byyyeeeee" pissed me off royally.

The rest was great. I genuinely liked this movie. Still do. And they finally used The Immigrant Song! That was pretty cool. If they'd thrown in Bring the Hammer Down and Thunderstruck, I might've called this movie perfect. XD

I wasn't totally in love with their portrayal of Loki in Ragnarok. Yes, the falling for 30 minutes line was funny, as was "I have to get off this planet" and "YES! That's how it feels!" And "Get Help" was funny as hell. But also, like... There is no way Loki would have been the dumb one in that first encounter with Hela. Also, he can teleport and project copies of himself and shit, so... He would not have been that desperate to go straight back to Asgard and bring her right along with them. Loki's not stupid. But whatever. Movie's gotta movie.

What I did love was seeing the slow mending of his relationship with Thor continuing, and the badass fighting on the bridge. I also loved that, like Real Loki, Movie Loki helped when help was needed, was quick and clever, and while he was carrying out the main plan, he was also planning ahead and grabbing the Tesseract. Yes, that drew Thanos right to them, but that's a whole other thing. Loki never would have left that thing on Asgard to be destroyed or lost.

And now Infinity War. Hooooly fucking shit. You know what? No. I'm not going into this. He was killed, years of character growth were erased forever, my heart fucking shattered. The end.

Endgame. IW hurt me so bad I didn't see Endgame until this year. I actually watched Civil War first (for context: I had actively avoided all Cap movies until this year because I fucking hate Steve Rogers. I find him insufferable. Did not realize what I was denying myself until I watched CW and finally saw the charms of Bucky. When he appeared in IW, I was so lost. XD I was like "...who dis? Murder Jesus?" also I just... didn't care. I was numb by then from crying through most of the movie over Loki)

So, anyway. Endgame. Loki picks up the Tesseract in alternate 2012, escapes, fans go "yay! he didn't actually die!" I go "yes he fucking did. Five years of his life, gone. Five years of growth and change, erased. Loki is dead. This will not be the same."

I was more right than I could have predicted. Now we come to the point of this rant. Sorry it took so long, but you were warned lol.

The Loki series makes me so angry I actually get sick to my stomach. It was fucking TRASH. When I praised Marvel for following Norse mythology so faithfully earlier? Yeah. I DID NOT MEAN TREAT HIM THE WAY THE OTHER GODS DID. I did not mean paint him as a pitiful clown, a joke, a caricature of who he truly was, with his pain and suffering played for LAUGHS.

This is supposed to be 2012 Loki, newly freed from Thanos' control. The Loki we saw in the beginning of TDW - snarky, exhausted, nihilistic. The Loki who rolled his eyes and said "get on with it" expecting to be killed.

The bumbling clown flipping on a dime from posturing to calling himself weak is not 2012 Loki. That is not ANY Loki. That is Tom Hiddleston in a black wig doing what he's told by a shitty writer who had no fucking idea what he was doing and was salty about his (bad) original script (for something totally fucking unrelated) getting killed.

In Episode 1, Loki is mocked, imprisoned, stripped against his will, tormented, belittled, and given a flippant summary of all the trauma Actual MCU Loki suffered that this one skipped out on, with no context, no acknowledgement of the trauma he's already lived quite fucking recently, and with the narrative twisted to not only erase all the abuse he's suffered, but to make it all his fault. And this is supposed to make him want to help these people?

And worse, IT FUCKING WORKS. WHAT?! I CAN'T- FUCKING WHAT?! Remember when I said LOKI IS NOT FUCKING STUPID?! So why is he STUPID?

Episode 2, he's a child. Mentally, this Loki is a fucking child. Now we've erased all the growth and development of his entire adult life. He's dopey, impatient, impulsive, desperate for a pat on the back and actually shows it. Yes, abused and neglected children crave the positive attention we never received, and we often grow up to be a bit emotionally stunted. But not all of us, and not Loki. Not as we've seen him EVER in the rest of the MCU. Playful and a bit callous at times? Absolutely! But not a big dumb fucking puppy.

Episode 3, a ray of hope, despite Sylvie! (I hate Sylvie) Loki casually admits he's pan/bi; labels never come up, but he admits to being with both men and women! He sings! Not really relevant to whether I approve of his portrayal or not lol but Tom has a beautiful voice, Norwegian ("Asgardian" lol) is a gorgeous, entrancing language, and I could watch that one bit on loop for eternity and never get bored. And then, finally, we see a glimpse - a glimpse - of Loki's power! He stops a falling building and pushes it right back up! Are we finally getting to see what he can really do? Will the next episode bring us Loki in all his glory?

Nope. 4 and 5 we see him mocked and pushed around and utterly irrelevant. Again. We see tiny reflections of what he could maybe theoretically do in other random Loki variants, but the "main" (lawl. main. it was the Sylvie and Mobius show. Loki was never the main anything.) Loki? Nothing. He wears his heart on his sleeve for no reason, bonds with the man who imprisoned, taunted, and gaslit him, is killed, and continues to be a moron and a joke. Always the clown. Always the dumb one. The one with the bad ideas. The inferior Loki.

Don't even get me started on that finale. I can't. This already took so much out of me. Fuck Marvel. Fuck this fucking show. I just... I'm done.

#loki #loki spoilers #loki series #loki negativity #loki hate #thor 2011 #the dark world #ragnarok #the avengers #infinity war #endgame #fuck sylvie #fuck marvel #fuck disney #this show sucked #ragepost #rant #long post #ali is angry

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wolvesandpetals · 3 years

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Loki x Sylvie Playing House Part 3 (Humor, Romance), Rated T. Full on Sylki hijinks, as promised!

Masterlist of my Sylki fanfics here.

---

The first thing she does when Thor leaves is Google herself. Apparently, she was a child actor and made a fortune there, before transitioning into modelling, and later into a successful influencing career.

"That makes perfect sense to me", Loki comments. "If I was not a prince, I would have chosen to be an actor too. Just imagine, legions of fans screaming your name, begging for your attention for just one moment, hanging onto your every word, willing to worship the very ground you walk on. Now, that is the dream." He pauses, cherishing the image in his head. "There's also the money. Looks like you and I will never have to work a day in our lives. We can just live off your money."

[[MORE]]

Sylvie feels the muscles in her laws instinctively tense. This is not her life, or her reality. She can't imagine spending eternity here. She looks at Loki sternly. "We can not. We have to return to the TVA."

"Yes, of course." He agrees immediately. A part of him likes this life. But another part of him knows there is never a gain without a loss. The universe finds a way to make him pay for every bit of happiness he ever gets. Who knows what the price may be if he chooses to stay, with his family, and with Sylvie right here?

Sylvie sets down the laptop on the bedside table, ignoring the danger of Loki's glass being knocked over and drenching it. She cannot let herself be concerned with such simple things. Ignoring them is the surest way to covince herself she hates it here. "I was wondering, if Thor can get into this town, and if he remembers us leaving this town in the past, does it mean we are free to leave?"

Loki studies her features, the resolute glint in her eyes and the defiant stance of her chin. It is clear that she will stop at nothing to get back to the TVA. "We should test it out." He says, trying to sound as calm as possible. "Where do you wanna go?"

"Maybe we can go to Oklahoma? See my supposed parents?" She attempts to play it off like it's nothing, even though she knows exactly what it means- temptation. The urge to see what this life looks like is ever-growing.

"Why can't we go to Asgard and see my parents instead?" He counters immediately.

Sylvie purses her lips, trying not to reveal her emotions. She doesn't remember her Odin or Frigga at all. A part of her longs to meet this version of them, but another part wonders how overwhelming it would feel, watching Loki occupy her place, have her life, her "parents" in this timeline. "Fine. How about we pick a neutral location first?"

"Fine." He replies curtly.

"Fine!" Her irritation escalates. She grabs the laptop again, opening up a tab to a travel website, ready to book a flight.

"LA?" He suggests.

"You just want the paparazzi attention, don't you?" She points out, but doesn't resist. "Alright."

September 1st. The date is set. They will be off to LA within three days, and if whatever being that has placed them here does not want them to leave, they will know by then.

---

"Do you really need all of these sunglasses?" Sylvie asks, after Loki stashes the fifth one in his backpack.

"Of course, I do." He defends. "Style? Remember?"

"Travelling light, remember?" She hits back, taking out two random pairs and throwing them back on her dresser. "Just take what you absolutely need."

"I absolutely need my sunglasses." He says stubbornly.

She can either give in on this trivial matter, or she can dig her heels in and fight it out with him. A stupid pair of sunglasses is not worth the effort. "Fine." And in return, there's something that he has to compromise for her as well. "Only if you help me get my swords past security."

"With pleasure." He says with a grin, and with a wave of his hand, the newly arrived swords from eBay are magically cloaked.

Sylvie looks at her own luggage. She has never really owned anything. She jumped from one apocalypse to another, with only her life, and sometimes food supplies for a few days. It feels surreal to look at the clothes in her wardrobe now. The thought of carrying them with her feels even more foreign.

She looks at the tons of products on her dresser, skin creams, lotions, toners, cleansers and heaven knows what else. All the luxuries she never had.

All the luxuries she does not want.

"I'll just pack a change of clothes." She says finally.

"You don't want anything else?" He asks, surprised.

"These are just things, Loki." She explains. "They can be replaced. I have no attachment to them."

---

She regrets not booking first class. She has been on planes before, using crashing aircrafts as a temporary hideout spot to regroup when the TVA was on her tails. As a stowaway, she never realized just how annoying a plane journey can actually be.

Loki graciously offers her the window seat, noting her unease as soon as they board. She thanks him with a smile, and they nod in mutual understanding.

She stares out of the window, at the town that is supposedly her home, and for the first time ever, she feels a pang of homesickness for a place that is not Asgard. She has been here for just five days now, yet, the thought of sleeping in her own bed is so tempting.

Sylvie notices how she is thinking of the bed as her bed now, but tries not to dwell on it too much.

The plane takes off without incidence, and she dozes off quickly. When she wakes up, she notices a thin comforter wrapped around her shoulders. Turning to her side, she sees Loki sleeping as well, his mouth slightly agape. She snuggles close to him, suddenly needing the comfort of his warmth, and the woman on the aisle seat gives her a dirty look. There's a baby crying somewhere in the back, and what feels like the beginning of a massive headache. But all that fades away when she lays her head on his shoulder.

---

When the flight arrives at LAX, they are both a little scared to leave its comfort. They are about to find out if they are free to travel wherever they want, or whether the action had any consequence. Sylvie is the first to take a step out, and they are both relieved to see nothing happens. The baggage claim goes smoothly, though slowly, and they get a cab quickly. Sylvie hides her grin when she sees Loki put on his sunglasses.

"So we're here." He says, staring at Sylvie, while she stares out of the window.

She only hums in response.

"Is this your honeymoon?" The driver asks.

Loki laughs nervously. "No, no. We've been married for quite a long time. This is just... a vacation."

The driver recommends them a lot of tourist places. Sylvie tunes him out. This is just a test. She has no interest in touring LA. They have their return flight scheduled for the next day.

They check into their hotel room, and she plops down on the bed immediately. "It seems we are free to leave the town. Just not the reality, I suppose." She runs her hands over the silky sheets, amused. "I must say, whoever placed us here has taken every measure to make this prison comfortable."

Loki follows suit and takes a seat beside her. "I suppose that is indeed generous of him. Or her."

Sylvie turns to the side to look at him. "So how do we get out of here then? Got any plan?"

He shrugs. It's not like there's a book called What to do when you find yourself trapped in an alternate universe with your alternate self for Dummies. "Right now, the plan is to get some dinner, then some sleep. Then perhaps in the morning we can see a bit of LA?"

"You want to play tourist?" She asks in a neutral tone.

He replies in kind, testing the waters. "We are here already, and we have the time, so why not?"

"Okay." She replies, a little unsure, but not entirely opposed to the idea. The weariness of the journey starts taking its toll on her. She messages her temples with her fingertips. "Should we order room service?"

Loki contemplates for a moment. On the one hand, she looks really tired, and she could use a good night's sleep. On the other hand, she has been completely on edge and razor focused on the mission since they got in this mess. Well, since they met, actually, and probably for centuries before that. She could also use a bit of fun and relaxation.

With that in mind, he carefully voices his proposal. "I was thinking maybe we can go down to the restaurant and have a proper dinner."

Sylvie looks up, grinning mischievously. She's about to call his bluff. "What, like a date?" His deer-in-the-headlights reaction makes her laugh. "Calm down, I'm just teasing you."

---

It's not a date, but it kind of is. It's a four course meal and a fine bottle of champagne over candlelight, after all.

"Was it like this? Back at Asgard?" Sylvie wonders.

"Mostly. But Asgard was grand, elegant. This is..."

"A cheap replacement." She completes.

Loki smiles. "Precisely."

They talk about their Asgard bedrooms, the similarities and the differences between their safe haven in the palace. An hour passes swiftly.

"The wine is good." Sylvie comments, sipping on her first glass of wine, when the champagne is drained.

"Yes, quite good." Loki agrees, on his first glass as well.

The tiniest buzz starts to take root in him, and his mind wanders into the realm of possibilities, the future he can have, here and now. His eyes focus on the brighest object in front of him- Sylvie.

She feels her cheeks flush under his gaze. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You are just so..." He blinks. What is another word for Asgard's Sun when it disappears into the azure lakes? "Breathtaking"

Her lips curve into a shy smile. This is the beginning of the same foolishness he showed on the train in Lamentis-1 that almost got them killed. But right now, their life isn't in imminent danger. Right now, she is just amused. "Wow, you really can't hold your liquor, can you?"

"Of course I can. I am Loki, Prince of Asgard." He declares proudly.

"Yes, yes, I've heard the speech." She says it with a smile and an eye-roll. "We should get you upstairs."

He objects immediately. "But I'm not done yet."

"Oh, I think you're quite done." She beckons the nearest waiter. "Can we get the bill, please?"

He can still walk surprisingly well, but she holds his hand tightly, just in case he decides to take a detour, and drags him into the elevator.

"Blonde looks good on you." He comments out of the blue. "Maybe I should go blonde too."

She grins. "Like Thor?"

He glares at her. "You're a buzzkill."

---

Sylvie opens the door after fumbling with the keys for a minute. She is starting to feel the effect of the alcohol as well. She takes off her shoes and her earrings, while Loki runs to the loo.

"Why did you book a room for two?" He asks in a serious tone, leaning against the door-frame of the bathroom.

Sylvie freezes, her hand hanging mid-air for five uncomfortable seconds before she awkwardly drops it to her side.

Why did she book a room for two? She could have just rented separate rooms, or at least ones with separate beds. It's not like she and Loki are actually together.

But they have been. At least for the past few days. Why do they need separate rooms here when they share a bed back home?

Home. Sylvie realises with alarm that she's thinking of her prison as her home.

Is this reality starting to mess with her mind now?

"It's okay, I don't want to leave you either." Loki's voice pulls her out of her inner monologue. She turns around quickly in his direction. He's still drunk, and it shows, but he has a look on his face that she has never seen before- a mix of resolution and fondless. His eyes whisper silent vows of loyalty, and something else, something he can't quite express yet. "I will never leave you."

Sylvie smiles, closing the distance between them and standing next to him. Her hand finds his by sheer instinct. "Good to know."

"I mean it, Sylvie." He gives her hand a reassuring squeeze, before he tugs her along with him as he sits down on the bed, unable to stand any longer in his inebriated state. She is grateful to be seated too, and she's unsure whether it is just the alcohol. "I know you hate it here. But I like this." He indicates at her, then at himself, then back at her. "I like falling asleep next to you, and walking into the kitchen first thing every morning to see you cursing at the microwave. I like how you hum in the shower and scream at the TV."

Sylvie listens quietly, her eyes focused on the feeling of his hand in hers. She is trying to memorize this moment, burn the shape of his fingers and the feel of his touch into her brain, so that when it's gone- when he is gone- like everything in her life always is, she will have another good memory to relive again and again.

Loki continues. "I like the way you burn the pasta every time you try to cook."

"I don't burn the whole dish." She retorts playfully. "Just the bottom part."

He shakes his head to show he disagrees. "Can I tell you a secret?"

Her heartbeat quickens. Is he going to confess that he has feelings for her?

Does he have feelings for her?

"Sure." She barely whispers back.

Loki double-checks. "Promise me that you will never tell yourself?"

She laughs softly. "I promise."

Loki tenses, suddenly looking sober. He lets go of her hand, to rest his by his side, his fingers clenched into a fist. Mastering all his courage, he finally speaks. "I don't want to leave. Ever. I like it here."

Sylvie looks away, suddenly needing air. Hearing Loki say that makes her feel irrationally angry. He promised to be on her side every step of the way, but the minute he finds a life he likes, he's ready to throw in the towel.

A part of the anger stems from the fact that she knows, a major reason he wants to stay is her, this life he has with her. Two Lokis on any other timeline will cause Nexus events. But here, they are free to be together. Timelines don't start branching off like a growing vine on timelapse video every time they touch. And he wants that. She knows this because he has all but said it with his words and his actions.

And because she wants it too. Damn it, she wants it so much. She is getting sucked into this reality, indeed.

But she knows she has to finish what she started- she owes it to herself, and to the people out there who need her help, who will be robbed of their lives if she doesn't stop whoever is doing this.

She wants to-

- But she can't.

"Loki, I-" she stops when she turns around to see he has already fallen asleep. Wordlessly, she wraps the comforter over his sleeping form, before crawling under it herself. Turning to her side, facing away from him, she wonders what's next for them.

#loki disney+#loki x sylvie #sylvie x loki #pro sylki #sylki #sylki fanfic #fanfiction

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 years

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Eye of the Storm 6

Warnings: nonconsensual sex, a Thor who cannot decide on one emotion

This is dark!Thor and explicit. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You are a new servant at the palace of Asgard but the job isn’t so easy as you thought.

Note: Well, I’m sure you’re thinking how can Thor get worse? Perhaps this chapter will answer that question.

Thank you (except @lokislastlove). Love you guys!

As always, if you can, please leave some feedback, like and reblog <3

Loki dismissed you in the late afternoon. You would be grateful for your freedom but that wasn’t really what it was. You’d return to Thor and whatever he had devised for that night. It seemed that with each passing day, he only got worse. Given his mood that morning, you had little hope that the pattern would break.

You entered the chambers, a shaky breath as you listened for any sign of activity. It was still early for the king’s return but he was barely predictable. The mess left over from his breakfast remained so you cleared it and did a walk through of each room. You rearranged the vials along the shelf in the bath chamber and straightened the bedclothes.

You went to the window as your anxiety mounted. The sun was on its decline; it was later. Where was Thor? Did you want him to return? If he didn’t, that surely wasn’t a good omen. That meant some inconvenience which would irritate him further. As you were learning, his displeasure, whether caused by you or not, was nevertheless aimed in your direction.

You stared out at the walls of the palace and the tall trees along the stone, the winding vines carefully trimmed. You watched the flowers as they fluttered in the evening breeze and basked in it yourself. It was a cool night in Asgard.

You jumped as the door slammed. You hadn’t even heard it open and Thor watched you turn to face him. You greeted him with a choked ‘my king’ and went to shut the door. He didn’t look long as he swept away from the door and stormed across the chamber.

He cleared his throat and waited in the door of his bedchamber, his back to you. You went to him and unclasped his cloak. He parted once he was free of the heavy scarlet fabric and you went to hang it in its place. As you returned to him, he was on the bed, carefully loosening his armour. Silent.

He was upset.

He lifted the armour over his head and dropped it on the bed beside him. You grabbed it, it was heavy, and you struggled to move it to the cabinet where he let it rest most nights.

“It will need a good polish tonight,” He said and kicked his foot out.

You crossed to him and knelt to unlace his boots. You wiggled them from his feet and set them aside. His large hands rested on his thighs and he sighed.

“So, how was your day spent with my brother?” He asked. You could tell he had been waiting to inquire.

“Well, my king,” You looked up at him and realised all at once that the proper answer was not the right one. “Work, mostly.”

“Mostly,” He wondered. “And what else?”

“He did let me take my lunch outside,” You shrugged. “The rest was work.”

“Mmm,” He nodded and scratched his chin.

“Well, draw my bath for the night. I am sore after so long running around this damned palace.” He growled. “Be quick about it.”

You stood, unsteadily, but kept from tripping as you flitted away from him. You rushed into the bath chamber and circled the tub. You began to pump the water out, hoping to curtail the king’s anger. Whatever had stoked him would not easily be doused.

He entered as the water splashed down and you followed his shadow at the edge of your vision. He paced slowly around the chamber and you let the faucet run as you fetched the bottle of jasmine from the shelf. You went back to the tub and balanced it along the ledge along the side. Thor went to the shelf in turn and took a bottle from the bunch. He moved it to the end of the line.

“How long have you been back for?” He wondered as he turned back.

“Not much longer than you, my king,” You answered. You weren’t entirely sure but you suspected that would not appease him.

He tilted his head and tugged at the hem of his tunic. He arched a brow and you took his wordless command with a wince. You neared him and your fingers nervously bunched the tail of his tunic. You began to raise it as he lifted his arms and bent for you to roll it over his head. You untangled the blue fabric from his hair and set it aside on the counter.

You went back to him and stared at his chest as you unlaced his trousers. You didn’t miss the twitch within. You pushed his trousers down and knelt with them. His socks caught in the ankles as he lifted his feet to free himself from them. You added them to the counter and he watched you approach him.

You hesitated and glanced up at his face. He smirked and grabbed your hands. He rested them at the top of his undershorts. You took the hint and hooked your fingers beneath the thin fabric and pushed them down. Again you bent to angle them past his feet and dropped them with the rest of his clothing.

You swept away to the tub and stopped the pump before it could overflow. You stepped back and waited for Thor to get in but he only turned to stare at you.

“And you,” He said with a small flourish of his hand.

“Sorry?” You blinked. You bid yourself to focus on his face; don’t look down, don’t look down.

“You had a day as long as mine. I must say you’ve worked quite diligently these last weeks. You’ve earned a respite.” He said.

“I don’t… understand,” You replied as you wrung your hands. No, you didn’t want to understand.

“You may share the water,” He said. “It will help loosen your muscles. You look… tense. And I cannot blame you after so long in the presence of my brother.”

“Your maj-- my king, I do appreciate such kindness but I cannot accept. It wouldn’t be--”

“It would be further remiss to deny your king,” His voice turned stony and his smirk fell. “Don’t make me treat you as the child you act. Shall I count to ten?”

You were breathless. You slowly stepped around the tub and pulled your hands apart. You stretched your fingers and your hands shook. You reached the knot of your apron and exhaled. Thor watched every move you made. You tried to ignore him as you untied your apron and folded it atop the counter, opposite his own clothing.

You heard him move, his footsteps were light but grew further away. The water stirred noisily as he climbed into the tub and he let out a long breath as he lowered himself into the steamy depths. You kept your chin down as you bent to remove your sandals. You stood and untied your belt, letting the braided leather fall onto your apron in kind.

You felt as if you would faint as you touched your skirts. You balled the fabric in your hands. You heard a low hum from the tub. A warning. You pulled up your dress and tried not to lose yourself in the rough swath. You untangled yourself from it and bundled it up on the counter. Your shift, short and barely to your thigh has rolled up above your ass and left you feeling naked already.

You braced yourself and shed your last layer. It rested lightly on the pile beside you and you turned stiffly to face the tub. You didn’t look at Thor but the wall on the other side of him. You walked forward, small measured steps, and reached out blindly for the edge of the basin. You steadied yourself and swung your leg over the side.

Once your second foot met the marble, you were startled with the swirl of water around you and Thor’s hands on your hips. Your lips quivered and he turned you around. You were so scared you couldn’t think. You just let him guide your body back and pull you down to sit between his legs. His cock bobbed against your back as he nestled you down with him.

“See,” He purred, “You’re so tense.”

This man, this king, was utterly disarming. One moment seething, the next placid and gentle. His hands went to your shoulders and he began to knead, his thumbs pressed just below your neck.

“Relax,” He cooed. “Sweet maid, I do apologize for loaning you out like some used book.”

“My king,” You barely formed the words in your dry mouth. “I do as you bid me.”

“Oh, but I must reward such loyalty. Such devoted work,” He purred as his hand crept further down your back and continued to work your muscles. You couldn’t deny it felt good.

You were quiet as he continued to massage your back, his hands decisive yet careful. It was hard to hold back the groans as the found knots along your shoulders.

“What is wrong? Do I not treat you well, sweet maid?” His hands stopped suddenly.

You shook your head but couldn’t muster a sound. He felt along your sides and his hands hugged your hips. He leaned forward and inhaled the scent of your hair.

“Why then you do you reject my generosity?” His fingers tightened. “Why do you act as if I am such a monster?”

“I don’t-- I--” You gasped as he pulled you back entirely and you felt his arousal snug against you. “My king.”

“Did you prefer your time with him? With my own brother?” Thor snarled. “You did seem rather pleased when I returned. Thinking of him?”

“No, no, please, let me go,” You begged as you tried to pull away.

“You do tell me an awful lot, don’t you?” He snaked his arm around you. “Tell me about how I should act, what I should do.”

“Not at all, I just--” You struggled against him desperately. “Please, you’re hurting me. You’re scaring me!”

“If I was the beast you thought I was, I would’ve held you down that first day and taken what I wanted. Hel, I would have bent you over the table at that feast and had you in front of the kingdom,” He sneered. “Don’t you feel that?” He wiggled against you. “What you do to me?”

You whimpered and he shoved you away. You barely caught yourself before you crashed into the wall of the tub. You turned as he stood, looming over you as he dripped with water. You clung to the marble, waiting for him to grab you. But he didn’t.

“Don’t flatter yourself. You are just a servant.” He hissed. He breathed heavily as his eyes glowed an eerie silver-blue. “So do your work,” He lowered himself again and rested against the tub. “My hair needs washing.”

You slowly pushed yourself to your feet. You were dizzy and sick to your stomach. You waded through the water and grabbed the bottle of jasmine from the ledge and the pitcher there. You neared Thor and he let you pour the water over his hair. You went through the numb routine of washing and rinsing his hair, adding the jasmine as you flinched at his hand on your thigh.

He pinched you, hard.

“Get my towel,” He demanded.

“Yes, my king,” You put down the small vial and the pitcher.

You climbed out of the tub and carefully crossed the room to fetch his towel. You shivered as he stood and stepped out. You wrapped it around him and he turned to secure it around his waist. He brushed past you and you went to pull the stopper from the tub. He paused at the door and turned back.

“Dry off. Do not dress.” He bid. “Then come to the bedchamber.”

He left and you found a towel to dry yourself off. You left your clothes as they were, resisting the urge to try to cover yourself as you emerged. Thor stood with arms crossed, still naked, his anger apparent in his stance, though his expression was little better.

“My king,” You said nervously.

“I don’t want to hear your voice. I only want you to do one thing.” He snarled and you gaped at him in fright. “You will stand here,” He pointed to the end of the bed. “Face the door. Don’t move.”

You hesitantly stepped forward and stood as he said. He turned to you and grabbed your hands as they began to fumble with each other. He pushed your hands to your side.

“Head up. Not a sound, not a move,” He ordered. “Stand as such until I tell you otherwise.”

He backed away and you watched him take a nightshirt from his cabinet. He pulled it over his head and spun back to you. He scowled as his eyes met yours, your head craned as you stared at him.

“I said don’t move,” He stormed back towards you and grabbed your head on either side and put it straight. “I won’t tell you again.”

He let go of your head and stepped around you to smack your ass. Hard. You swayed on your feet and bit down the yelp which threatened.

“Perhaps you will learn your place,” He huffed as he turned and marched out of the room.

You stared at the door as it slammed but didn’t dare move. You feared that even with a wall between you, he would know. Your ass stung as tears pricked at your eyes and you sniffed. If only Loki had warned you sooner.

🌩️

The door opened again just over and after you were left alone and trembling. You stood stalk straight. You watched Thor as he strode in without acknowledging you, not even a glance. You thought to apologize but you recalled his order. Not a sound. You suspected it was too soon to even attempt atonement.

So you stayed as you were and listened to him move around the chamber. He blew out the lanterns harshly and the bed groaned behind you. In the dark, with only the light of the stars from the windows, you realised it was going to be a very long night indeed.

Your legs began to ache, your feet too. As the king’s snores rose, your eyelids began to droop and you shook yourself to keep from dozing on your feet. Your shoulders drooped weakly as you swayed, the short nights catching up to you as you were completely alone in your torment.

The chirps of the bugs and night birds without kept you awake, barely. You watched the window for the time and when the king snorted you snapped your head straight in fear he’d wake to catch you. You tried counting the minutes but lost track as your mind seemed to lag.

As the sun began to rise, you yawned and felt as if you’d topple completely. You moved your feet slightly further apart and stretched your arms at your side. A little while longer and the king stirred. He rose and you held your breath as you listened to him stagger into the bath chamber to relieve himself. He returned and you looked at him from the corner of your eye.

He yawned and cracked his neck. You licked your lips and gathered all the courage you had left. Tired, you found it hard to make your voice rise.

“My king?” You croaked.

He turned to you with a sneer and you gulped. He didn’t rebuke you, so you continued.

“Might I… apologize… for my… insolence?” You ventured daintily, pressing your hands to your thighs.

He lifted his brows and blinked. He crossed his arms and turned to face you entirely. He watched you expectantly. You cleared your throat and swallowed.

“I only did as I was bid yesterday but I fear that is not the reason for your displeasure.” You found it hard to look at him as his eyes bore into you but the slight twitch in his cheek encouraged you. “I should not have scolded you at the clifftop, it was not my place to do so. I did contradict myself when I spoke of our expectations and I heartily apologize for the offense I’ve caused you.”

He considered and nodded.

“Go on.” He urged.

You weren’t sure what else to say. You searched his face and slowly took a step forward. His eyes wandered down your body, a vital slip. Encouraging.

“Please forgive me,” You took another step. “I never meant to offend you and I’ve only served you loyally.” Another step. “I did only attend the prince upon your bidding and I swear I hated every moment of it.” Another, as the lies flowed freely. “I did long to be back here. Even if you’d not be here, I’d rather be awaiting you than in the prince’s service.” You stopped right before him. “I am so very sorry. You had every right to punish me and would not be remiss to dismiss me entirely.”

“Beg,” He demanded. “Get down on your knees and beg your king’s forgiveness.”

You reeled but quickly shook away your surprise. You backed up and slowly got to your knees. You clasped your hands together and bent your arms before you as you gazed up at him. Make it believable and he might show you mercy.

“My king, I am so very sorry. Please forgive me,” You forced out. “Please, forgive me, I could not bear it if you did hold a grudge against me. Should you send me away even, it would not be so bad as your dissatisfaction.”

He looked down at you and his hands fell to his hips. The hem of his nightshirt moved and you focused on his eyes. A smile spread across his face and he hummed. His lips parted but he was interrupted as another voice rose in the silence.

“Very curious indeed,” Loki slithered from the doorway. “I was knocking and did receive no answer.”

“You should have waited.” Thor turned and waved you up to your feet, speaking to you as he kept his attention on his brother. “Do cover yourself.”

“Please,” Loki added. “Why, brother, I have news too urgent to wait for you to finish… whatever this is.”

You swept a blanket from the bed and shielded yourself as the prince glanced at you. Despite his grin, there was something in his eyes which betrayed perhaps a sense of disappointment. He looked to his brother again and rubbed his hands together.

“What is your news?” Thor growled.

Loki’s amusement shone through at last and he chuckled.

“Why, brother, your bride has arrived. Early.” Loki announced. “And it seems at the most inconvenient time.”

#thor #dark thor #dark!thor #thor x reader #dark thor x reader #dark!thor x reader #fic #eye of the storm #mcu #marvel #dark fic #au #series #dark!fic #loki

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cozy-the-overlord · 3 years

Text

Dances and Daggers

Summary: The Summer Festival is upon Asgard, as is the tradition of the dagger ceremony, where each unmarried gentleman chooses a lady to bestow with the honor of carrying his dagger for the night. As Prince Thor’s betrothed, Teki’s only goal is to accept his dagger with grace and hope that her violent stepfather doesn’t find fault with her in the process. But Prince Thor is unpredictable, and when he ignores his engagement on a whim Teki finds herself in a desperate situation. Luckily, Thor isn’t the only prince in Asgard…

Pairing: Loki x Original Female Character

Chapter 13: The Apothecary

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Word Count: 2,943

Chapter Summary: Teki and her mother run into an old friend in town.

A/N: Words cannot express how long I’ve waited for this chapter.

Thanks for reading!

TW: Mentions of child abuse

Tags: @lucywrites02 @gaitwae @moumouton4 @berriemalfoy @whatafuckingdumbass

if you want to be tagged, feel free to just send me an ask/message! :)

Read it on Ao3!

Teki followed her mother through the disorderly streets of town, head down and trying to act as if she wasn’t sulking.

She was.

She had just been readying to meet Loki in their spot by the lake that morning when her mother announced that she would be taking her to meet with a new dressmaker in town.

“What’s wrong with the palace dressmaker?” Teki asked, in a voice that was probably too close to a whine. Her mother glared at her.

“Nothing is wrong, of course. But you need a change, and I’ve heard wonderful things about this man.” She clapped her hands together. “We’re leaving in a few moments. Brush your hair.”

They walked down the main road, past market stalls and men on horseback and children weaving in and out through the streets as they chased each other. One little boy nearly ran into her mother, skidding to a halt before he could collide with her indigo skirts. He nodded quickly, laughing a short “apologies, my lady!” before he rushed off to join his friends.

Her mother scowled. “Can no one control their children?” she muttered, watching the crowd bound down the avenue. “It’s the same mess every time I come.”

Teki bit her lip. If you hate it so much, why are we even bothering? Hopefully, Loki didn’t wait for her long. When she didn’t show up, he probably would’ve gone to check her apartment, and then Brant could’ve told him where she’d gone. She swallowed a frustrated sigh.

Along the side of the road, a familiar clanging broke through the chaos. Asta the Apothecary pulled her cart forward, ringing her bell as she greeted those who passed her.

“Can I interest you in a healing draught? Something to help you sleep? Or perhaps you’re looking for love?” The old woman smiled, completely unbothered by the lack of response she was receiving. It was strange—she had frightened Teki the first time she had saw her, back when she and Loki had come to visit Völundr, but now Teki found herself admiring the woman’s assurance. She wished she could walk through life with as much certainty in her step.

When she passed by Teki and her mother, Asta’s smile only grew. “Lady Áslaug!” she cried. “May I interest you?”

What?

Teki’s mother stiffened. Grabbing her daughter’s arm, she doubled her pace to an even brisker walk, dragging Teki along with her. Teki stumbled over the dirt road as she attempted to keep up, head spinning. Asta only continued on her way as if nothing happened.

“How did she know you?” Teki whispered. “How did she know your name?”

“I haven’t the foggiest idea,” her mother snapped. “But Norns help me if I waste my time on every decrepit creature who speaks to me.” Her fingers dug into Teki’s arm, so much it hurt, but Teki didn’t dare to pull away. She couldn’t remember a time when her mother seemed so quietly dangerous. Discretely, she risked a glance back at the apothecary as her bell and clattering cart faded away into the rest of the hubbub. Asta had moved on, but her simple greeting still lingered. It hadn’t been a polite “hello” between strangers—that exchange had reeked with familiarity. Beside her, her mother remained tight-lipped and fuming.

How do you two now each other, Teki wondered, turning away from Asta’s retreating form, and why is my mother lying about it?

…

The dressmaker’s shop was little more than a room, a modest little place squashed between a bookseller’s shop and the bakery. From the way her mother had talked about it, Teki had assumed that some kind of arrangements had previously been made for an appointment, but the elderly little man who welcomed them in was surprised (and completely delighted) to learn who they were. He introduced himself as Ulrik and was quick to call his assistant up from the back, babbling on about how honored he’d be to design a garment for her.

“It’s not every day we have the patronage of royalty,” he gushed, pulling Teki onto the little podium for measurements. “I’m honored, truly honored—”

“Um—” Teki squirmed as he wrapped the measuring tape around her waist. “I’m not royalty—”

“Oh, apologies, my apologies!” Ulrik was nearly breathless as he called out her waist size to the assistant, a blonde girl who could only have been a few years older than Teki. He knelt to take her height, continuing to fumble with the tape. “But you are to be, yes?”

She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, glancing anxiously at her mother. Lady Áslaug stood in the back, looking on with a crinkled nose, the perfect portrait of noble disdain. Teki swallowed. Somehow, she managed a nod.

The girl taking notes perked up. “What’s Prince Thor like? Is he as gallant as he is handsome?”

“Um—” After the previous night, it was difficult for Teki to categorize her fiancé as either gallant or handsome. As Loki promised, the Crown Prince had come to her for a dance before the end of the night, but only after excessive celebration and an inordinate amount of alcohol. By the time he approached her with an outstretched hand, he was swaying on his feet and seemed to have forgotten his own strength. Teki spent a miserable three dances being jerked across the floor like a rag doll before he had enough and returned to his friends for another drink. Her head ached at the memory.

Still, the blond girl prattled on, oblivious to Teki’s discomfort. “Watching him in the Games was simply magical! Such strength—he makes everything seem effortless, doesn’t he? And he’s barely a year older than me!” she sighed, holding her notepad to her chest. “You’re so lucky, my lady.”

That’s a word for it.

It went on forever: the measuring, the conceptualizing, the choosing of a fabric—that went on for longer than forever, as her mother was scandalized to learn that they didn’t have access to the exact shade of crimson to match Thor’s cape.

“Many, many apologies, my lady!” Ulrik repeated obsequiously, holding his hands up to appease her anger. “But my business is very humble, and we have not the funds—”

“Funds!” snapped her mother. “Are we not paying you enough?”

As Ulrik attempted to explain that someone of his status didn’t have access to some of the dyes she was describing, Teki turned to the window in frustration. None of this would have been a problem if her mother hadn’t insisted upon visiting a new dressmaker—the palace seamstresses never had an issue with obtaining dyes or fabrics. Once again, Teki found herself wondering what they were doing here.

They had been there so long, she realized with a sardonic chuckle, that Asta was already making her way up the opposite side of the street. The old woman had stopped her cart just across from the dressmaker’s window and was conversing with a young girl in servant’s garb. She unlocked the glass cabinet holding her precious potions, picking out a corked vial so small Teki could barely see from where she sat.

Delicately, Asta clutched it between her forefinger and her thumb, gently sloshing the liquid around as she held it out to the girl. The girl nodded, turning to dig through the pack at her hip.

Teki frowned. She had seen that before. That motion, the way she grasped the vial—there was some memory attached to that, dancing just beyond the reach of her mind. The voices of her mother and Ulrik seemed to fade away. Teki pressed her face to the window.

The girl had found what she was looking for—six silver coins, which sparkled in the summer sun as she counted them out. Asta counted them out again when she took them in her hand, smiling her crooked smile. She handed the vial to the servant girl.

Vial.

Vials.

Two small glass vials, one empty, one sealed and filled with a deep burgundy liquid, both locked away with the memories of a man long disappeared...

“Your father wasn’t a potion maker, was he?”

The realization hit her like a bolt of lightning.

Teki whipped around to her mother. She was facing away from her, still locked in embittered debate with the dressmaker. She glanced out the window again. The servant girl had left, and Asta was making to leave as well, closing the cabinet and readying her bell.

No, wait!

She turned one last time at the others in the room, all too wrapped up in their discussion to focus on the subject in which they were discussing. Teki slipped out the door.

“Excuse me!” She scrambled across the dirt road, dodging horse-drawn carriages and irascible pedestrians in a mad dash to reach the apothecary before she had gone too far.

One driver cursed when she ran too close to his horse. “Watch where you’re going, girl!”

“Sorry,” she murmured, far too quietly for it to count as a legitimate apology. Asta turned around completely unaffected, waiting for her on the side of the street.

“Good afternoon, sweetling,” she smiled, when Teki finally made it to her in a panting mess. The wrinkles in her face deepened. “What can I offer you today?”

“I—” She hadn’t thought this through. “Well—what do you have?” she asked, rather lamely.

The apothecary gave a throaty laugh. “If you need it, old Asta’s got it.” She motioned to the cabinet, where vials upon vials of multicolored liquids glowered down at her indecision. Teki scanned them, but her cursory glance yielded not a single flash of burgundy. The weight of the old woman’s expectant gaze held her captive as she helplessly vacillated before the cart.

Do something, you fool!

Teki motioned towards a horde of bottles, a sparkling red too bright to be the liquid she found in her mother’s lockbox. “What are those?”

“Why, those are my moneymakers!” Asta chuckled at Teki’s look of confusion. “They’re potions of love, sweetling. Incredibly popular, both amongst the masses and the gentry.” She reached into the cabinet to stroke the glass vials like one would stroke a cat. “I suppose status doesn’t affect one’s desire to be desired,” she mused before turning back to Teki rather abruptly. “But you have no need for such tricks, do you?”

There was a knowing sparkle in her eye, which only confused Teki more. “Why—why do you say that?”

“With the way that the little prince was looking at you? That’s purer than anything that can be cooked up in a bottle.” When Teki only gaped, Asta’s smile widened. “Has he not made his feelings known? Perhaps what you need is a potion of truth.”

Loki? How would she know they were even friends, let alone possibly something more? Sure, she had seen them together when they came to visit Völundr a few weeks ago, but that interaction couldn’t have lasted more than a minute! She would have had hardly enough time to get a good look at Teki’s features, let alone evaluate the nature of her relationship with the prince.

“I—you remember me?” Teki stuttered. “From when Loki and I were here?”

“Of course.” The apothecary seemed almost amused by this examination. “I never forget a face, not once I’ve met them.”

Teki swallowed. This seemed to be the perfect opening to the question she wanted to ask, but she was almost afraid to take it. “You knew my mother,” she said finally. “When did you meet her?”

“Ah.” Asta hummed in realization, leaning against her wooden cart. “‘Tis not potions for which you seek, is it?” Teki shook her head with a slow jerk. The old woman sighed. “The Lady Áslaug sought me out many years ago. You would’ve been quite young.”

Teki inhaled. “What did she buy?”

“Why so curious, young lady? Is this not something you can ask her yourself?” There was something in her voice that told her Asta knew precisely why Teki was so curious, and why she couldn’t ask her mother herself. Teki picked at the sash of her dress, searching for the right words. Once she found them, they came out it a jumble.

“I found two vials hidden in her things. Your vials. One was empty, one was full and still sealed.” She scanned Asta’s features for any sign of a reaction. The apothecary only raised an eyebrow.

“Still sealed, you say? And pray, what was the color?”

Teki didn’t blink. “Burgundy.”

“Ah.” Now it was the apothecary’s turn to search for words. They stood there in silence for a long moment, Teki dangling at uncertainty’s edge on Asta’s rope. “I remember what I sold her,” she said at last. “And I will tell you, happily. But a part of me wonders if you truly wish to know.”

No, she probably didn’t. In the past few weeks, she had learned many things about her family that a part of her wished she had never known. But the truth had slept on for far too long. It was time for her to stop running and wake it up. Teki nodded.

Asta sighed. “Very well.” Without skipping a beat, her voice hardened, morphing from quiet reflection to emotionless recollection. “She asked for a poison. Odorless, tasteless, fast acting. She knew what she wanted. I sold her a vial of embers of frost, enough to kill a grown man in half an hour, and a vial of the antidote.”

Teki stared. The apothecary’s words didn’t seem to register. She should’ve been feeling something—denial, fear, rage, something—but it was as if she had fallen into a freezing mountain lake, so cold she couldn’t even tell what was hurting her anymore.

“The antidote…” she breathed the question even though she already knew the answer. “It was burgundy, wasn’t it?”

“Aye.”

The poison empty and gone. The antidote immaculate and untouched. Both left to rot alongside the journal she should not have had, in a box that should not have existed. Her father lost within the week.

It didn’t mean … it couldn’t mean—

“Wh—what—why did she want it?” There was a buzzing noise in Teki’s ears. There’s no way in Hel he left you of his own accord. But it couldn’t be what it looked like. It couldn’t be—

“I didn’t ask, my lady,” Asta said. There was a sort of pity in her eyes as she gazed at Teki. “I only sell means to swindle. I never ask who it is they wish to swindle.”

“Swindle?” Teki asked weakly.

“Everyone wants to swindle something. Swindle love, swindle health, swindle truth.” She patted the side of the cart. “Your mother merely sought a way to swindle life.”

Swindled life. Swindled marriage. Swindled daughter. Swindled engagement.

“Tekla!” Her mother’s voice rang out across the road, frantic and fuming. Teki turned just in time to see her seething glare before she nearly yanked her arm out of its socket, dragging her off before Teki had even the slightest chance to respond.

They were halfway back to the palace before they finally stopped, her mother pulling her into an alleyway to shake her shoulders. “What were you doing talking to her?” she demanded. “What was she telling you?”

“She—” Teki blinked, praying for any tell-tale tears to evaporate. “She wanted to sell me a love potion.”

Her mother studied her with an icy stare. Teki was frozen, afraid to move.

“Come,” she finally said, turning back towards the road. “We’re going home.”

Áslaug offered no information on the new dress as they passed through the palace gates, and Teki didn’t ask. She had to talk to Loki. She had to figure out what to do next.

Brant and Osvald were out when they returned to their apartment. Her mother told her to go to her room—not in an angry way, necessarily, but with a tone that offered no room to argue. That was all right. Teki waited for the lock on her bedroom door to click before rushing to unlatch the window.

She wasted no time in the gardens, sprinting to the back entrance of the palace and slipping through shortcuts until she reached the royal wing. Teki was hardly a stranger to this end of the building, what with all of her piano-playing in Frigga’s apartment, but she had never visited Loki’s quarters before. If anyone saw her, it probably would make a perfect addition to the ever-growing list of scandalous occurrences between her and the younger prince that the court gossips held in their back pocket, but Teki rapped on the door without a care. She needed to talk to Loki. She needed to see him, needed him to tell her that they were going to figure it all out and that everything would be fine. It didn’t matter what everyone else thought.

Which is why she blanched when it was Frigga’s melancholy smile that opened the door instead.

“Oh, Your Majesty, forgive me!” Teki stumbled. She tried to glance over her shoulder for a sign of the prince, but the room behind her seemed deserted. “I—I was looking for Lo—Prince Loki.”

The Queen sighed. There was a sadness in her gaze—no, not sadness. Pity. “I’m afraid you won’t find Prince Loki here, darling.”

Teki’s heart dropped. “What?”

“His father has sent him to continue his studies on Vanaheim for two years. He left this morning.”

“He’s—what?” No, she had to be mishearing, misunderstanding, misconstruing—Loki couldn’t be—

Frigga shook her head. “I’m sorry, Tekla. He’s gone.”

#loki marvel #loki fanfic #loki x ofc #dances and daggers #dances and daggers chapter 13 #the apothecary #cozy writes

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hela-avenger · 4 years

Text

poison & wine- part 17

Author: hela-avenger

Word Count: 1536

Summary: Prince Loki of Asgard is in need of a date to take back home. That’s where you come in with a task of your own to make the whole trip with an insufferable prince worth it. Too bad that things don’t always go as planned and you end up giving more than you can take. Fake-Dating AU.

A/N: If you’ll like to be tagged please send me a message! Thanks for reading everyone!

poison & wine masterlist

The shirt was coming along nicely and you couldn’t help but feel proud that you hadn’t lost your touch. It had been a while since you had sown anything from scratch. You used to make most of your clothing, later on mending the things you owned, to a point where you stopped sewing altogether.

Nostalgia was hitting you quite hard but you refused to let your emotions show to the girls who were seated around you.

At hearing of your task, Datya and Lynn had excitedly brought the materials needed and wished to learn how to make a shirt themselves. Alongside making Loki’s shirt, you were teaching the girls how to cut the measured frames and how to stitch them together.

Iana, after having cleaned up the breakfast that the other girls had neglected to help her pick up, had joined you too. She seemed to need no help as she quietly started to make her own shirt.

As of now, you were making a white button-down for the prince while Iana made him a black one, and Lynn and Datya conjoined tried to make a green one.

“So why are you making the prince a shirt?” Lynn asks you. “He already has enough.”

“The Allfather has requested that I do,” you answer with a shrug. “It’s meant to be my gift to signal the start of our courtship.”

You look up at the girls who seemed to have grown silent.

“Is that wrong?”

“No, no, no... “ Datya quickly responds. “It’s just… that’s quite an antiquated notion.”

“It is?” you ask.

“What Datya meant to say it’s that recent courtships tend to skip such traditions in order to proceed to an engagement,” Iana steps in. “I assume the Allfather wants the prince to follow through the long process to assure him he’s ready to take you as his wife.”

You fight against the scowl that wants to make an appearance on your face and simply turn your focus back to sewing the sleeve. You really had to talk to Loki about this whole engagement issue people kept bringing up to you.

“Right, well, either way, it gives me something to do,” you tell them. “It’s been a while since I’ve made anything by hand.”

“I’m surprised that you even know how,” Lynn states. “We were told that Midgard had advanced to an industrial setting.”

“We have,” you stammer out quickly knowing they couldn’t catch on to your lie already. “But my mother was old-fashioned. She taught me everything I know.”

“Oh, well that’s very kind of her,” Lynn responds. “It’s quite a useful skill to have.”

“It is,” you whisper to yourself. You really didn’t have the mind to think of your mother at this moment. You had to remain focused on the matters in hand.

“So…” Datya pipes in excitedly. “Now that we’re all alone and no interruptions, why don’t we continue our conversation from yesterday?”

“And what conversation was that?” you ask.

“The one about you and Loki!”

“Oh, yes,” Lynn agrees. “You never gave us any details.”

“Girls,” Iana calls out to them in a warning.

“It’s fine, Iana,” you assure her though you were deeply panicking at the incoming interrogation. “They’re just curious.”

Gaining the green light, Datya is quick to ask you a question.

“How did you two meet?” she asks. “Was it love at first sight?”

You knew that Loki and you had failed to discuss a cover story but you knew that nothing worked better than telling the truth at the moment.

“Oh no,” you chuckle out. “Quite the opposite really.”

“Really?” Lynn asks eagerly.

It’s not that hard to recall your first introduction to the dark prince. You were catching up with Thor about your travels when Loki had decided to walk in.

“I met Loki through his brother. Thor introduced me to him and Loki simply nodded at my greeting and left the room without another word. He was very cold to me in the beginning. It took a long time for him to warm up to me and even then he tends to slip up every now and then.”

“How long have you been together?”

“I uh… It’s hard to measure,” you answer knowing a lie had to be entangled into your words. “I travel a lot in Midgard so my visits to the compound where Loki stays are hard to date exactly. Our… courtship just seems to have appeared out of nowhere one day. There was a shift. One that I didn’t even realize had occurred until I saw him again.”

“Because you missed him,” Lynn sighs out with an enamored tone.

“Yes, because I did,” you can’t help but agree.

“He probably missed you too.”

You hum in response as you cut the thread from the first sleeve done. A silence falls into the room as everyone focuses on sewing but it doesn’t last very long.

“Is he concerned about your mortality?” Datya asks you.

You hadn’t expected that question. You should have known it was coming but you were caught off guard nonetheless.

You heard about Loki’s opinions about Thor and Jane. You knew he didn’t agree with it. You could answer in his own words but you knew that wouldn’t help sell this fake courtship at all.

“We haven’t really discussed that,” you answer quietly.

“But you thought of it?”

You pause at the question directed solely on your opinion.

Have you thought about your own mortality?

Of course, you have.

You started to when your mother aged in front of your eyes while you remained the same. You thought about it every day since then. It was why you kept yourself moving. Not allowing time to keep you rooted in one spot to watch how things aged and died around you. You couldn’t allow yourself that grief again. You couldn’t carry that weight for the centuries you still had lying ahead.

And yet, you couldn’t bear being alone anymore.

That’s why you had to find your father. He was the only kinship left. The only one who could live long enough to spend the rest of your half-immortality with.

“Yes, I have,” you finally answer. “It’s why I live my life without fear, seek what brings me happiness, and follow it until I reach it.”

“That’s beautiful,” Iana comments.

She had set her sewing down and watched you with an unreadable expression. You felt uneasy under it. Her eyes somehow manage to read you perfectly. You felt as though you revealed too much especially as she cast her eyes away from you.

“Enough questions, girls,” Iana orders. “Allow Lady Y/N her much deserved privacy.”

Datya and Lynn know better than to argue and remain silent. Their attention turned to the cloth at hand. You let out a sigh of relief and finish up the second sleeve with no interruption. All that was left was placing the buttons and perhaps if time allowed it, some embroidered design on the cuffs or the collar.

You set your work in progress down in favor of completing a task you had set for yourself.

“If I wish to pay Heimdall a visit, how would I go around to do so?”

Loki walked down the halls of the palace trying to conjure some sort of plan to overcome the sudden obstacles that had arisen. He hoped you could shed some light on your parent’s history and perhaps from there he could see what resources available he could make use of.

It made him uneasy.

The whole concept of not knowing.

Loki didn’t understand how you’ve lived this long with this question lingering in your mind. He also didn’t understand how you traveled to Asgard with a last minute plan that currently involved him doing all of the hard work.

Loki craved for order. It’s what he desired the most at the moment. Something that you had denied him with this chaotic mess that is the search of your father.

He needed answers. He needed the truth. He needed you.

So the dark prince walked with a purpose in search of you making his way back to his bedroom only to find two of your handmaidens leaving from it.

“Ladies,” Loki greets, startling them instantly.

“Your majesty,” they bow.

They seemed nervous without bothering to attempt to hide it. Loki brushes past them and swings the door to his room open only to find it empty. He’s quick to turn back to your handmaidens who are looking up at him in alarm.

“Where is she?”

They both share a cautionary look before one of them is bold enough to finally look at Loki in the eye and answer.

“Iana took her to the stables,” she answers. “Lady Y/N wished to visit Heimdall so we told her she would need to ride there.”

“We advised her to wait for you, but she insisted on going alone.”

Loki tries to reel back the anger that rose within him. You had mentioned seeking the All-Seer’s help but he had made it clear that it would be pointless. He should have known you would ignore his warning and go ahead to seek the answer yourself.

With no plan once again.

poison & wine tag: @damalseer @just-the-hiddles @jessiejunebug @nonsensicalobsessions @smollest-soybean @assassinoftheworld @readerbandit @doyoufeelikeayounggod @strangemcuvlogs @ha-tep @i-dont-know-eiither @gene-king @day-dreaming-fox @bn-studies @is-it-madness @sigyn-njorddottir @devilbat @victor-criss-bish @skinny-macncheese @musicconversedance @baby-bunnyxn @fandoms-allovertheplace @marvelloonie @jinxjinxednova @queenmuahaha @accio-boys @eternalqueensworld @umlvk

Loki Tag: @unicorniorosacomefrutillas @thesilentbluesparrow @oddly-drawn-muse @josiehosiedaninja @hp-hogwartsexpress @sadwaywardkid @wolf-lover74 @sizzlingbarbarianglitter

All Works Tag: @jmb959 @astudyoftimeywimeystuff @hellocookiecutter @steve-rogers-personal-hell @buckybarnesyard @not-zari-tak

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imagine-loki · 3 years

Text

Soulbonds and Fairy Dust

TITLE: Soulbonds and Fairy Dust (rewrite) CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: 29/?

AUTHOR: nekoamamori ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine one of the fae has been helping the Avengers, jumping in to help them on missions and vanishing before Shield can bring her in. Loki joins the team and convinces her to come talk to the team and consider joining before Shield takes more drastic measures. RATING: M NOTES/WARNINGS: This is a rewrite of the original work of the same name. Also on AO3 here

Loki looked horrified when he realized what he had done. “I’m so sorry, darling. This is all new to me-” he tried to explain quickly. He looked ashamed of what he’d done, how he’d messed up the one rule she’d given him. At least he had the decency to look ashamed.

Sig continued to glare at him again. She finally broke free and turned to the others with panic and anger in her eyes. “Get to the horses and be ready to ride out. Now. I’ve got to get this closed,” she snarled at them. There was no time to be nice. Not with the doorway still open. Not with what Loki had done. “Every single fae hunting me will know exactly what doorway we’re at,” she reminded them all for the reason for the rule about no names. The others rushed to prepare the horses and mounted while she worked on closing the doorway.

Loki wisely remained silent as she worked. He knew she was rightly pissed at him. More at the situation than him, though. It was a simple mistake. It was just a potentially deadly simple mistake.

Sig drew a wickedly sharp blade, this one much larger than the belt knife she had been using for this. This blade was one of her battle blades and as long as her forearm. She gripped the dagger carefully and draw a long line down her arm, wincing in pain as she cut deeper and longer than she had for any other doorway. There was no time to pussyfoot around about this doorway. She had to close it. Fast. She heard Loki’s gasp in sympathy and horror at her pain and what she was doing. He didn’t approve. It wasn’t his choice.

Not this time.

She gathered more blood, more power to shut this doorway as fast as possible. She ignored the drain, even as she shivered from drawing so much power at once from the power of her blood. She slammed the doorway shut as fast and hard as she could. She was not taking any chances. She drew even more power to charm the area to keep any new doorways from being created here for a long, long time.

She turned to face the others with the same panicky edge to her tone and expression. “We’ve got to move on. Now. It’s not safe here,” she told them firmly and started back to the horses on shaky legs, ignoring that she was still bleeding.

Loki stopped her, his hands on her shoulders, steadying her. “Wait just a moment, darling,” he told her, though she was nearly too dazed with power drain to understand or comprehend what he was saying. He held her to him while his glowing green hand went over the bleeding wound on her arm, sealing it so it would stop bleeding. Once the bleeding had stopped, Loki’s arm wrapped around her shoulders and he rushed her over to her horses. Everyone else was mounted already. She swung into the saddle of her horse, focused on getting the Hel out of there. “We have to go, now,” Loki directed the others.

“They shouldn’t be able to come through here. I spelled the area to block more gates, but…” Sig wasn’t thinking clearly due to exhaustion and power drain. It was safer to get out of there, just in case. Loki nodded in understanding and she could see he was feeling guilt for his slip up. For the pain he was causing her to clean up his mistake.

Sig kicked her mare into a gallop, terrified of being caught there. She trusted the others to catch up and keep up. Loki caught up with her quickly. The others followed just behind.

She finally consented to slow the headlong panicked gallop once they were out of her ability to sense the clearing. She sighed in relief. “We should be far enough away now,” she told the others softly. She was visibly wilting as the adrenaline rush of terror finally wore off.

Loki looked over at her, extremely concerned over her state. She was holding onto the saddle-horn to keep on her horse’s back and trusting that the others would lead her safely to her next destination. She was too drained to do anything for herself. Blood magic was draining enough, it took magic from the user’s body, and the user’s life-force if too much blood magic was used. She’d drawn the heat from her body, drawn on her fae power, and the exhaustion was bone-numbing as she sat shivering in her horse’s saddle. Loki rode closer and reached out his hand with a cloak in his hands. It was green and fur-lined. And she was sure it belonged to Loki. She reached out a shaky hand to take it and managed to drape it over herself. “We must find an inn or tavern, now. She’s in bad shape,” Loki told the others as she went back to staring listlessly at the pommel of her horse’s saddle, her colors had faded again.

Thor consulted the map, judging their location after Sig’s panicky headlong gallop. “There’s a village not far from here,” he told Loki.

“Then let’s go. She needs to rest, desperately.” They could all hear the fear and worry in Loki’s voice as he spoke.

Thor led the way to the village. Everyone looked concerned at how listless and exhausted Sig looked. She was drained even more than usual from closing that doorway. She was wilted and it seemed her vibrancy was diminished, her very colors faded.

“You two might want to figure out how to break her illusion spell on you. You look like fae,” Sif reminded Thor and Loki. Sig hadn’t had an opportunity to remove the illusions from them.

“I can try it,” Loki told Sif. He was the master magician of Asgard after all. This was in his realm of abilities. He looked to Sigyn. “Sig?” she blearily looked over at him. “Sig, what do I have to do break her illusion?” he asked once he could get her attention.

She blinked quickly and tried to focus on the words to make them form a coherent sentence. Really, it was amazing she was staying on her horse. “You can dispel it just like any other illusion. I cast it with your magic,” she told him softly. She hoped her words made sense. They seemed to, since Loki focused for a moment and the illusions on him and Thor both shattered so they looked like themselves again.

Sig was mostly asleep in the saddle by the time she reached the village. She only half-woke when the horses stopped in front of the tavern. She didn’t wake enough to notice any of what was going on around her. Loki dismounted and helped her down from her horse. He immediately swept her up into his arms. She yelped a protest. “You’re dead on your feet, love. And it’s my fault. Let me take care of you,” Loki told her gently.

Her head crashed onto his shoulder, too exhausted to fight him.

The innkeeper gave Loki a room, which he carried her to quickly and tucked her into bed gently, tucking the blankets and warming spells around her. He kissed her forehead. “Rest, darling. I will watch over you,” he bid her softly. She nodded and was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.

#Loki #Lover #Submitted fic #submission #Soulbonds and Fairy Dust #chapter 29 #nekoamamori #rewrite

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tarithenurse · 4 years

Text

Stolen - 23

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson &/x fem!gifted!reader Content: A roller coaster of emotions and feels. A/N: So my psychiatrist recommended/ordered for me to take 2 weeks of sick leave because I’m a stressed out mess...that’s not going to stop me from writing, of course. Au contraire, without work I’ll have more time for that! Ask or reblog for tag ;)

23. Misery Machine

... Reader ...

What the ever-living FUCK? The bubble of happiness bursts, the pop loud in your mind but blown away by the cold storm raging before you in the shape of a raven-haired god with the colour of blood in his eyes. Memories of faces smiling during the feast come and go in a blur and leave you none the wiser as to what Loki’s problem is.

“Uh...yeah? It was okay,” you try carefully, “think I’m getting closer to Sif and the trio to accept me.”

“You don’t say?” Sarcasm is probably the default state for the god, you decide there and then. “Practically crawling onto their laps.”

Staring dumbfounded at him, each snarled accusation is a whiplash driving you closer to desperation as up and down cease to make any sense. Unsure whether to laugh, cry, or scream back at him, you just stand stock still. Loki, on the other hand, has taken to stalking around the room as he denounces the Asgardian ways – feasts, pretend friendships, nothing goes free – before ultimately turning to you again on an unseen wave of icy coldness radiating from the bluing skin.

“I’m surprised you didn’t have my dear brother rescue you,” he hisses, “or went with Fandral for comfort...he’d be more than willing to oblige.”

“Wait...what?”

Oh yeah, the fallen prince’s eyes are swallowed by red, leaving only a pinprick of black from the pupil. “You heard me.”

Sure did, smurf. “This’s ‘bout them? Are you...? D’you think I’m desperate enough to dick it down with Fandral or have Thor sweep me away like I’m some maiden in distress?”

Now you’re the one getting into his personal space. Though you’re far from as imposing compared to a god with ruby eyes and frosty skin, his raven hair cascading to his shoulders in ways fit for an anime character, you still manage to push him back a few steps before he digs his heels in.

“Tell me honestly, the idea doesn’t tempt you, mortal?”

“Hell yeah, it tempts me! But, y’know what? I can’t! If I go back home to hide and some day Thanos shows up...how’d you think that’d make me feel? Or if you take your dumb-ass on some quest to find the fucker only to get killed? No, that ain’t happening ��cause I’ma stick through with this. That’s what this mortal’ll do: do things right.”

You can barely see him because tears (which you refuse to let fall) are blurring your vision. By some miracle, you manage to find the door and march down the dim hallway without bashing face first into something but by the time you turn the first corner, your cheeks are wet.

GAAARGH! He’s such an...an...UGH! Haven’t you already proven yourself? Sure, he might just see you as a mortal, as he keeps pointing out, but how many mortals does he know that would’ve been able to handle the mess he’s thrown at you? Admittedly, it might be your self-diagnosed Stockholm Syndrome speaking when you feel you deserve more respect from Loki. Not that he has to “like me” like me...just...

Wiping salt water and probably snot from your face, you look around for somewhere to be alone with your thoughts and spot a double door which could lead to a balcony or terrace only to find it blocked by a blond figure.

“Lady [Y/N]?” You’ve only spoken with Thor once, but no one else has a voice like that, a voice you don’t want to hear right now. “Please, tell me what troubles you.”

Why bother? It’s so easy to follow along as he cups your elbow with one of the huge hands and escorts you onto what does indeed turn out to be a balcony.

Any other person would gasp at the view of the golden-roofed city below, stretching towards the ocean and the infinity of space just beyond. You, a sarcastic thought jeers in your mind, you’re busy sniffling and holding back tears because of some silly spat – and there’s no way you can tell that truth to the man beside you.

“I know...I’m a stranger to you and you have no reason to trust me with your worries,” Thor begins softly, “yet I do feel responsible for your fate. Your chance of happiness. What my brother di-”

“Enough!” The exclamation startles him, blue eyes reconsidering the woman before him. Oops. “I’m...I’m sorry, your highness,” you try to recover while your heart beats in your ears. “Forgive me. You have no obligations on my behalf, your brother’s actions are not yours to atone for.”

The dazzling smile is pretty even if it’s barely hiding a pain beneath. “Kind words, but clearly it torments you.”

“No.” Oh, that’s actually true. “No, what pains me is what I’ve learned since. Thor...you’ve been to Earth. You’ve seen us humans...and you know we’re hopelessly unprepared for what’s to come!”

“Even if Loki would be foolish enough to attack once more, Midgard is not defenceless. You know this.”

The Avengers. Thor had stopped Loki and his Chitauri (as you later found out the aliens were called) invasion. It hadn’t exactly been pretty which is something a lot of politicians are still pointing out – or were before you suddenly found yourself at the mercy of the guy who’d plotted the attack. It feels like years ago.

“Not...” How can I say this right? “Not Loki. Thor, please believe me, he’s not the real problem.”

“Any threat at all...your realm is under my protection.” At least his brows have the decency to furrow, almost hiding the pristine blue.

“He came for the Tesseract...but he already had a Scepter with magical abilities. Where did he get that? Who helped him – or who did he help?”

Obviously, the older brother isn’t as dimwitted as Loki claims because you can see tiny lights go on and off as he connects some of the dots – eyes gazing through your skull and into a different infinity than the one beyond the borders of Asgard and finding the murky areas where there isn’t enough information to illuminate the unknown.

When the crown prince does focus on you, a new worry tightens the muscles of his jaw. “If the Tesseract was all he wanted, why not leave?”

“Who wanted the Tesseract, really? And was that all?”

“Then why the invasion? A smoke screen?”

You shrug (even if it’s hard with Thor’s heavy hands resting on your shoulders) because what else can you do? And silence falls again as each option and its implications are weighed carefully.

“What makes you certain of this?”

Loki might be the God of Lies, Mischief, and whatnot...but looking up into his brother’s face there’s no way he wouldn’t sniff out the smallest inkling of deceit.

“I don’t know anything for sure,” you sigh, “I was...shown some bits and pieces. Been trying to make sense of it.”

“A vision.”

Weeeeell... “If that’s what you’d call it. I’m just scared of what might happen.”

Later, you’d think back of it as a pretty decent hug, but in the moment you are more concerned with continuously breathing as Thor pulls you into a crushing embrace.

“Get some rest, little one,” he smiles tiredly after pulling back, “you have my word I’ll look into this matter.”

... Loki ...

He hears her return to the suite, mainly due to the subdued curses as she struggles to undress. Then the few candles he had left alight are snuffed before [Y/N] settles into bed with a sigh. The single candle in the servant’s tiny room creates sharp borders between shadows and illuminated areas unless Loki exhales particularly hard. I’m not sighing.

Since the woman had stormed out of the quarters, the Jotun has tried to calm himself down and ignore the screaming in his marrow as guilt eats through the bones. Eventually, he succumbed and went to bed only to lie and stare up into the ceiling. A thin blade slips between his fingers in repeated somersaults until he grabs the knife by the handle only to redo the whole thing.

Counting his breaths, he reaches well into the hundreds before daring to step into the suite. The slanted moonbeams illuminate patches on the floor and bed, glistening on the silken covers shaped like a woman. He does his best to ignore it, he really does. Moving silently, Loki picks up the scattered layers of the dress to straighten them out and hang them on the other side of the screen. In the cold light, it is difficult to ascertain the colour of the fabric but he remembers it clearly from when he saw her across the room during the feast where he had been expected to assist – a task perfectly suited to get him closer to the servant and listen to their gossip, of course. He has to shake himself from the tainted memories before continuing the silent duties.

Once, not too long ago, these were details he didn’t bother with. The work of lowly servants, there was no need for a prince to worry about picking up after himself unless he chose to, and while Loki was (and is) meticulous he had certainly never expected to be the one doing this for others. Beneath me! Grumbling within, he still lingers to let the delicate ribbon from [Y/N]’s hair slither between his fingers.

It’s a welcome diversion to imagine how it would be to untie the bow and set her locks free. Or to be the one slipping the straps of the dress off her shoulders and watch it hang on for dear life by her bosom. To gently tug at it, bearing the nipples for me to admire. He can see it in his mind. What Loki doesn’t notice are the eyes watching him.

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alloftheimaginess · 4 years

Text

New York

Wordcount: 1364

Warnings: Swearing

I walk into the lab looking for Thor "I was wrong, Director. The world hasn't changed a bit" I hear Steve say.

"Did you know about this?" Bruce asks Nat as her and Thor walk in.

"You wanna think about removing yourself from this environment, doctor?" Nat asks and Bruce chuckles. "I was in Calcutta, I was pretty well removed" he says leaning against the table.

"Loki's manipulating you" she says calmly obviously scared.

"And you've been doing what exactly?" He asks obviously annoyed.

"You didn't come here because I bat my eyelashes at you." Nat says.

"Yeah and I'm not leaving because suddenly you get a little twitchy" he says turning the screen.

"I'd like to know why SHIELD is using the Tesseract to build weapons of mass destruction" he says pointing to it.

"Because of them" fury says pointing to me and Thor.

"Us?" I ask.

"Last year earth had a visitor from another planet who had a grudge mass that levelled a small town. We learned that not only are we not alone, but we are hopelessly, hilariously out gunned." Fury says walking closer to Banner.

"Our people want nothing but peace with your people" I say.

"You're not the only people out there, are you? And, you're not the only threat, the world's filling up with people who can't be matched, they can't be controlled" Fury says and I suck in air.

"Like you controlled the cube?" Steve asks.

"Your work with the Tesseract is what drew Loki to it, and his allies. It is the signal to all the realms that the earth is ready for a higher form of war" Thor says finally speaking.

"A higher form?" Steve asks.

"You forced our hand. We had to come up with some-" Fury gets cut off.

"A nuclear deterrent cause that always calms everything down" Tony cuts in and I roll my eyes at the childlike behavior.

"Remind me again how you made your fortune, Stark?" Fury asks.

"I'm sure if he still made weapons, Stark would be neck deep” Steve says.

"Wait, wait, hold on. How is this now about me?" Tony asks putting his snack down.

"I'm sorry, isn't everything?" Steve asks causing Tony to grow angry.

"And here I thought humans were more evolved than this" Thor says rubbing his face and I smirk at his comment.

"Excuse me, did we come to your planet and blow stuff up?" And everyone starts arguing.

"Children" I yell and I whistle but everyone ignores me.

"Let’s all just shut the fuck up!" I yell and they quiet down.

"No one even knows who you are" Tony says.

"I'm literally your only hope, can any of you get to Loki?" I ask hand on my hip and when no one answers I smirk.

"I thought so, fighting each other isn't the way to go. We aren't going to get anything done, we aren’t each other’s enemies, we are a team but a team divided amongst itself cannot win" I say and they start again and I roll my eyes, sitting down giving up and mentally checking out.

"You people are so petty, and tiny" Thor says and I laugh.

"Yes, right. I think I'm done here, it's probably best I return home since none of you actually care about what we're going to face" I say dusting myself off. "Stay put" Fury bosses and I stand by Thor.

"Agent Romanoff, would you escort Dr. Banner back to his-" Bruce cuts him off.

"Where? You're renting my room" he says. And I start shaking, feeling completely drained so I focus my mind but it's quickly interrupted.

Something starts beeping and Bruce walks over to it "oh my god" he says and an explosion goes off flinging us everywhere and I smack into the glass groaning as I roll over once I hit the ground.

"Are you okay?" Thor asks helping me up.

"Just my leg" I say groaning and he helps me over to the chair.

"I have to get to Loki" I say standing up.

"You're going to bleed out" he says touching my face "I’ll be okay, I need to talk to him" I say limping out grimacing every step I take.

"Go help Natasha" I say and he nods running off. "Good luck" I shout.

"Same to you"

I put my hand on the scanner opening the door and I limp in and Loki's face drops.

"My Queen?" He asks practically jumping up from his seated position.

"Are you okay?" He asks and my lip starts quivering as my eyes water.

"Do I look okay?" I ask and he walks closer to the glass pressing his hand and I stare at it shaking my head.

"I could have been killed Loki" I say.

"I didn't know you were here, if I did it wouldn't have happened" he says and I press my hand against the glass and I stare at it for a minute.

"Bullshit!" I snap snatching my hand away from the glass.

"Bullshit Loki, you don't love me" I say stepping back shaking my head.

"Don't say that" he says.

"Is it not obvious?" I ask.

"If you really cared about me, if you really loved me you would be on Asgard with me and your son, but here you are locked away in the stupid cage because we weren't enough for you" I say full on crying.

"I was trying to give you the world" he says barely in a whisper.

"I never wanted the world Loki, I already had it with you and Amion, I didn't need anything else, I didn't care if you were a king or not" I say pausing to calm down.

"After you died, or well pretended to die I was a mess, three days ago I get asked to meet with heimdall and I show up and he's there with Thor and they tell me you're alive and that he has eyes on you because he's never stopped looking out for you" I say.

"Don't say anything" I say when I see him open his mouth.

"I never stopped looking out for you. When he told me what you were doing I couldn't believe it because that's not my Loki" I say shaking my head.

"My Loki would never hurt the place that I care for, the Loki I know and love, knows that this is wrong. The Loki I know is just the god of pranks and hurting his brother who can take it. Then I got to thinking maybe it's not my Loki" I say looking up at him and he looks down.

"Look at me" I say my voice shaky and he doesn't look up.

"Look at me!" I scream hitting the glass and he looks up and I stare deep into his eyes.

"What did he do?" I whisper seeing how broken he is.

"What happened?" I ask feeling the tears stream down my face and the last thing I expect to happen happens and he breaks down crying.

"Loki" I say and he looks up.

"You have to make this better before it gets worse" I say kneeling down so I can be eye level with him.

"We need you, don't get yourself killed" I say and he nods.

"When you fix things I promise I'll do everything I can to help you" I say.

"They are under a spell only you can break" he says speaking up and I nod getting up to open the glass he's behind and fury walks in.

"What do you think you're doing?!" His voice booms as he yells at me.

"What's right" I say walking over to Loki and I conjure up my magic.

Once the purple glow pops up I put my hands to his head moving them in a circular motion and he falls out.

"What did you do?" Fury asks grabbing my arm tightly.

"I just saved my world" I say glaring at him.

"So unless you want me to not do the same for yours I would appreciate if you let me go" I say through gritted teeth as I push him away.

125 notes · View notes

writingthingsisdifficult · 5 years

Text

I found you

What happens when you find out that you’re Loki’s soulmate?

In my head everyone’s alive. Warning for cursing. Also for me not having English as my first language. First time writing Loki too. Or anything Marvel, really.

Hope you like it. Let me know if you do :)

Word count: 8789

______________________________________________________________________

I should have known better than to venture into the archives that today; my premonitions have been acting up for days. But I ignored the signs, and now I keep staring at this photo, ears ringing with shock. I would have missed it if I hadn’t stopped to admire his sharp features – it’s not secret I think he’s attractive. Hell, even the guys in the compound think that.

If this is true, I’m in so much trouble… but there really is no mistaking it. The mark on his wrist – partially obscured by a trailing sleeve and only visible because he’s banging on the glass – is clearly the twin to my own. Not to mention the painful longing in my chest whenever I look at his face or hear his voice on the interrogation tapes. I haven’t met him in person yet, and I doubt I ever will. He is a known terrorist who has tried to kill and or enslave humanity after all, even though they say he’s reformed and isn’t in the business anymore. At least that’s what Thor says, but he always believes the best of his brother.

No one knows where Loki is at the moment. Not even Thor can find him – not that that means much; Loki’s had a lifetime learning to hide from him.

I didn’t think much of it at first. The pull in my consciousness and the black pinprick in my chest were weak enough that I just thought I was exhausted. Constant threats to the planet you live on will do that to you. But as the time passed I only got worse, so I arranged a little visit to the lab where both Tony and Bruce ran a bunch of tests I don’t even know the name of – under supervision of Dr Cho and Stephen Strange. Such an odd collection of geniuses. It’s a wonder they didn’t kill each other.

It was Helen who first realised my condition was soulmate-related after Tony suggested PTSD and anxiety as a half-joke. Everything clicked in place then. But I mean, I was embarrassed as hell. Couldn’t look any them in the eyes for a week after… I’m a grown woman; I should be in control of my own destiny. But Fury made me swallow my pride when he had an assignment for us all, and when we got home Natasha and Tony apparently made it their mission to help me out.

Tony wrote a little algorithm to scan for my soul mark, and Nat pestered me continually for information. But they found nothing. It’s not so strange, really, since my apparent soulmate is a master of disguises – he’s probably out there having the time of his life as a boa constrictor or something. Man, the stories Thor tells when he’s in the mood. CRAY-ZEE!

So how did I find out I’m knee deep in shit thicker than a southern accent? Well, I was looking through a couple of old files, trying to find a pattern to a new phenomenon we’d just discovered when I came across screenshots from the surveillance tapes from Hamburg and there it was. His mischievous grin and the blurry lines on his wrist… If I didn’t already get tested, I’d run to the infirmary so fast I’d probably trip over my own feet and smash my head on a sharp edge or something.

My heart is beating unnaturally fast, and every time I focus in on his face, it skips a couple of beats. And it that isn’t enough: my mark itches and tickles whenever I’m thinking about him, which is basically continuously. I’m feeling both ill and exhilarated at the same time, I hope I don’t throw up. The archivists will kill me if I ruin their precious system.

As the truth sinks in, I’m flailing for a solution, even though I know there’s nothing I can do about it. You can’t just un-soulmate someone, and I definitely can’t ignore it now that I’ve found out. People go crazy for less. But I can’t stay here. Thor might find it amusing, and Bucky might not judge me – much, but the others? Imagining the looks on their faces makes me dizzy. They will be disgusted. No, I can’t stay. I have to leave. Fuck.

In a flash, I’m on my feet, power-walking through the halls to my room. Once I’m in the elevator I can’t stand still, tapping my feet and my fingers. Thousand thoughts ram my brain all at once, and I don’t know how to shut them off. I’m lucky most of the others are on a mission right now. I don’t know what I’d do if I met any of them in the hallways.

I slam the door behind me, grab the nearest backpack and start throwing random shit in it. My brain is working overtime, and I can’t seem to focus, but at least I’m awake enough to stop myself from stealing a car and flee straight away.

I hoist the backpack up, securing the clips over my chest and hips. I thinkI’ve gotten everything, and I’m about to leave when there is a soft knock on my door. Crap. Not now. I try to calm myself down before I open the door a tiny bit so whoever’s outside can’t see the mess in my room.

“Oh. Hey, Wanda.”

“Hey, Y/N. You okay? I heard you slam the door.” She looks genuinely concerned, and for a second I’m worried she’ll try to enter my mind, but she has sworn she will never do that again, so I push that thought away.

“Uh, yeah,” I reply a little too quickly. Forcing a smile onto my face, I shrug and tell the first lie that pops into my head. “I, uh, just really had to pee, so I lost my grip on the door handle, you know. Didn’t mean to slam it like that.” Wow. That was almost believable.

Wanda nods, but I can see the suspicion lingering in her eyes. “Alright. You will tell me if you’re upset, right?”

This time it’s me who nod. I feel guilt stabbing my chest, but I can’t tell her. Not now. She won’t take my news well. “Of course,” I add. In my own ears it sounds false, but she seems satisfied, and returns to her own room.

This is a complication. She will be on the lookout now. I can’t sneak past her. So, what are my alternatives? If I leave my things behind I could probably crawl through the vents, but I don’t like cramped spaces and besides, I’ll probably run into Clint somewhere in there. The hallway is out of the question. I sigh. Guess I finally have to face my fear of heights. My room is only on the fourth floor, and there’s fire stairs going all the way down, but it’s still higher than I would like.

I tip-toe to the balcony, opening the door as quietly as I can. It’s silly of me. No one’s really expecting me to sneak out, and it’s not forbidden to use the balcony at all. But I’d rather they not knowing I’m gone before I’m far away.

Swallowing my fear, I carefully reach my foot down onto the top step. Suddenly I jerk back, and I swivel around, ready to tell Wanda to let me go, but it’s only my backpack caught on the railing.

Letting out a shaky breath, I continue, one step at the time, careful to keep to the shadows and out of sight from the other windows. The rest of the descent is without further problems, but I’m still relieved when I’m finally on solid ground again. From here it’s a short run to the garage, and then… gonna have to steal a car after all, but knowing Fury they’re probably full of tracking devices. I’ll have to ditch it somewhere along the way.

_______________________________________________________________________

There is a bright flash, and it keeps playing before my eyes. My head is swimming and I stumble around, flailing and trying to find something – anything – to grab onto. If only the world would stop spinning!

One hand grazes my forehead, and it’s almost painful enough to stop me in my tracks, but not quite. It feels like I’m on fire, but my brain is polite enough to tell me, through short and incoherent sentences, that this is to be expected when one is being hurled into the sun.

It’s getting darker. Each flash grows dimmer, and my shoulder bumps something hard. It’s flat, and it’s not moving, so I dare open my eyes for half a second. A fuzzy hallway comes into view. The light is fading fast now, and my legs make their own decisions, taking me all over the place before steering me with full force forward. There’s a loud crash and a thin creaking that sounds so far away. Someone is muttering, maybe it’s me, I don’t know, and then everything grows dark.

_______________________________________________________________________

The goddamn ELEPHANT in the hallway is making so much noise it’s difficult to concentrate on the book. Even magically sealing the flat doesn’t help much, so with a deep sigh and flickering flames in his eyes, Loki carefully sets it aside and moves silently to the door. He flicks the flap covering the spy hole away and peers through. There’s nothing there, but he senses a presence of sorts.

The hairs on the back of his neck rise. Have they finally found him? There’s no time to flee, and Frigga’s voice whispers in his ear, to fight, to go down with honour, to allow himself an end fitting of a Prince of Asgard.

It only takes a couple of seconds to decide, but when the door rattles with force, his resolve strengthens. He yanks it open, knives in hand, echoes to the side, ready to fight, when a body collapses into him. He stumbles back, supporting the woman as he does, making the door slam shut.

He lifts her gently into his arms, not sure where this sudden concern comes from. She’s a total stranger, but somehow he’s overcome with the need that she should be safe. He’s not sure he likes it.

_______________________________________________________________________

Something cold is pressed against my forehead, and it lessens the dull thump a little bit. I lean up and into it, but it pushes back.

“Shh, don’t move.”

I try again, and this time a hand pushes down on my chest, holding me in place.

“You really shouldn’t move; that’s quite the bump on your head you’ve got there.”

My body jerks suddenly. I still feel like I’m submerged in flames.

“You’re shaking!” The owner of the voice feels my face again. “Hel! You’re burning up! What…” There’s a short pause. “Ah. This is what you mortals call a fever. I was starting to worry. But a fever we can work with. Lie still, please.”

What feels like an ice-blanket descends over me, and I drift off with the silky smooth voice swirling in my mind.

_______________________________________________________________________

The pressure in my ears lets up a bit, and it feels easier to breathe. The coolness on my face feels so lovely and I lean into it with a content sigh.

The surface moves and I frown in my half-sleep, but it soon returns, caressing my cheek and neck. And as my consciousness returns in full, I open my eyes. The light is too bright at first; I can’t see anything, but then a face swims into focus. Initially I can only see the dark hair falling in waves over broad shoulders, but then… keen, watchful eyes, sharp lines, and a mouth bearing a mischievous smile.

“Loki?” It feels like the world shifts under me.

“I will not hurt you.”

Of course he doesn’t know who I am, so naturally he tries to look both calm and harmless. He can’t have a panicked person running around in his home, or worse: outside. It’s not difficult for me to believe his promise.

He helps me sit up, and though it’s thrilling to feel his hands on me, I’m too dazed to do anything other than give him a faint smile. The movement makes me queasy, so when he lets go, I grab an armrest for support. “Thank you,” I offer weakly.

“You’re welcome.” It looks as though he wants to say more, but apparently he changes his mind. After a long silence, he asks: “How are you feeling? Looks like you had a run in with a rhinoceros. While I quite like the beasts, I don’t think mortals would fare well from an encounter.”

“I’m okay, I guess. A bit bruised, but nothing is broken. At least I think so.” I move my legs tentatively. No problem there. My right arm is fine too, but when I try to lift my left arm, pain shoots white sparks from my shoulder. I hiss loudly.

He moves to examine me, but something makes me flinch. I’m not ready yet. He holds his arms up and back away.

“Sorry,” I whisper, looking down at my shoes. “It’s not your fault.” This is silly. I shouldn’t be afraid of him touching me.

“You don’t have to be sorry,” he offers with a smile. “You may know who I am by name, but we are still strangers. Will you allow me to tend to the bruises and cuts on your face?”

I nod, steeling myself for the pain, but his touch is light and nimble, his skin cool. I find myself leaning into his hand.

“You crashed through my door,” he begins. “Bloody and beaten, half dead by the look of it. What did this to you? Who…” He cuts himself off, and he looks properly confused; he definitely did not expect to be this invested. A few seconds tick by, just enough for Loki to regain his composure, but his fists keep clenching and unclenching.

His voice is much calmer when he asks again. “What happened? I need to know so I can figure out how to deal with these…” He gestures to my bruises, but there’s a tremble there, like the emotions are just kept in check. But if it’s sorrow or rage or something completely different I can’t say.

I think for a bit, trying to picture the minutes before I woke up on Loki’s sofa. It’s just a big blur. There was someone there, I was struggling to free myself from a pair of arms pinning behind my back, but it’s all in shadow really. But I do remember fumbling for something to defend myself with. There was a… “The portal,” I blurt out, and Loki looks even more confused. “I… I must have pushed a button or something before I… stumbled. Fell. Whatever. I think it dissipated once it was used, though.”

Loki gets up in a hurry, knocking a chair to the floor with a lout clatter, and all but sprints out the door, except he doesn’t sprint, he powerwalks, and I surprise myself by finding it endearing.

Moments later he returns, a relieved smile on his face. “You were right. The portal is gone, and there is very little residue. I tried to open it again, but its source seems spent – permanently closed,” he adds to the benefit of my confusion.

“There are several types of portals. Some acts like doors that has to be summoned to fulfil certain demands, others…” his voice is eager, and I would love to learn more about the magical properties of portals, but I feel pretty tired. In fact, I am, and I can’t hide the grimace when a particularly sharp pain shoots through my shoulder.

In a second he’s next to me, supporting my weight and pressing his cold hand to my forehead. “Maybe it would be better if you lay down again.”

I shake my head. “I’m good. Just need to, to relax. Please, continue.”

“I wonder,” Loki says with a pensive look, then falls silent.

“What?”

“How you found me. This place is warded. No one is supposed to find me here, let alone stumble over me accidentally.”

Oh, I can think of a reason, but I don’t voice my theory, it’s too early and Loki hasn’t really shown any definite signs that he’s happy I’m here. Instead I say: “Like in Harry Potter?”

He looks at me, an amused smile lurking in the corner of his mouth. “Something like that. My point is: you should not have been able to find me at all. Even my oaf of a brother –“

“Hey!” I just can’t let him talk ill of Thor. “Your brother is a sweet man. He always made me laugh, and he was really upset when you disappeared. You know, he’s out looking for you every day. So yeah, he’s kinda like a big, bouncy sheepdog but he’s not stupid.”

Loki looks a bit taken back, like he wants to ask me if it’s true, but I know he’s a master of appearance, and my heart aches for him. From what I’ve read in his files and from the stories Thor told us, I understand why he’s so closed off.

“Never mind,” he says after a while. He looks me up and down as if he just noticed me sitting there. It’s clear he’s not unaffected by my presence, but he plays it cool. At least he’s not threatening to throw me out. Yet. “I expect you wish to clean up? And then perhaps you would join me for supper? I had planned to dine in silence, but since you are injured, you might as well join me.”

My stomach flips, and then his first question registers. My face burns. He can probably smell me from where he’s standing, too. “So much for a good impression,” I mutter as I hurry after him.

“This way.” He leads me through the bedroom to a large, decadent bathroom. I stare in disbelief. How has he managed to find a place with such space and luxury here, but then it hits me: magic. It probably wasn’t like this when he first moved in.

“Towels are in the cupboard to the left. There’s soap and, uh, shampoo in the shower.” His voice draws me out of my reverie, and I nod. “Right,” he continues. “I’ll leave you to it.”

Once the door clicks shut behind him, I waste no time shedding my dirty clothes on layer at a time. The socks all but flies off. My plaid shirt as well, but it hurts more with every movement and when the time comes to pull the t-shirt over my head, a lightning shoots from my shoulder, blinding me momentarily.

I stumble and crash into the wall, knocking things off the shelf and making a general mess of things. The pain has me reduced to a whimpering heap on the floor.

The door opens and the cold air sends shivers through me. Loki’s hands are gentle as he lifts me back on my feet, and I swallow my embarrassment as he helps me pull the shirt off.

Reaching for my arm to examine my shoulder, he stops mid-movement when he notices my mark. His eyes flick from it to my face and back again, his mouth opening and closing like a goldfish. I think he’s gonna say something, when suddenly he whirls around, rushing out the door, leaving me both shocked, confused, and more than a tiny bit hurt.

Thinking about it, I don’t blame him. I’ve had four years to come to terms with it. Up until a few moments ago he had no clue what we are.

I remove the rest of my clothes slowly, careful to not rip open any cuts. Loki could probably heal them with his magic or some Asgardian ointment, but I really don’t want to push him right now. For fucks sake, we only met a few hours ago.

The water pressure is perfect, and after a couple of minor adjustments, so is the temperature. Why does he keep the water so freezing? Oh. Right. I feel like a moron now. This is going to take some getting used to. I mean… he’s not even human. Wait, is he? Like a different species of human? I was so preoccupied with finding him that I never stopped to think about that. My mind fills with new questions I never thought of before as I work the shampoo into my hair.

Will he get sick like an ordinary human? Can I spread disease to him? Influenza? The cold? Or maybe he is immune. Probably, but I don’t know. I doubt anyone really knows. Jeez, I should go buy a notebook and write these things down so I can ask him later. If there is any later. What if he doesn’t want me the way I want him. What if… are we even compatible? I mean, I don’t even know for sure how his body works.

With all these what-ifs swimming around my head, I step out of the shower and reach for a towel. It’s so soft I stand still for almost a minute just pressing my face into it, stroking the towel like I’m a lunatic. Eventually, though, I dry off and wrap another towel around my hair. It takes me a couple of seconds to realise that my torn and dirty clothes are gone, replaced by a pair of black sweatpants and a dark shirt with green stripes.

Smiling to myself, I get dressed, savouring the feel of soft materials and the discreet smell of the fabric softener. This is exactly how I imagined his clothes would smell, and I’ve thought about it a lot.

The shower did wonders for my sore muscles and injuries. It takes almost no effort at all to comb through my hair, and looking in the mirror I deem myself almost presentable now.

When I emerge from the bathroom my stomach is churning; meeting Loki for the second time, trying to make a better impression – while wearing his clothes… It’s ridiculous! This whole situation is insane!

I find him in the living room. He’s standing with his back to the door, but I’m pretty sure he knows every movement I make. Deciding we have all the time in the world, I take a couple of moments to look around.

There’s bookshelves on all four walls, absolutely laden with books. Some look really old, too. A teacup rests on a low table in front of a grey sofa, a half eaten biscuit on the saucer. In one corner, under an old-fashioned reading lamp, sits a well-used leather recliner. A book is lying face down on the seat.

The light from the window falls on a huge, dark green kentia, and despite the unease in my chest, I feel a smile tug on my lips. Loki definitely isn’t as cold and heartless as some of the reports I’ve read said.

I approach him like you would an injured animal. He’s standing by the window, arms crossed over his chest. It looks like he’s spying on the neighbours, but I’m not even sure he’s looking at anything at all.

“Loki?” I try to keep my voice neutral, but I can’t hide the hint of insecurity and fear that leaks through. Hope he doesn’t misunderstand.

It takes a few breaths before he reacts. His shoulders move up and down, up and down. And then he turns. Slowly and on the spot. There’s a gleam in his eyes I’ve never seen before.

I take another step, but stop when it looks like he’s gonna bolt. Here we stand, watching each other, wondering… my heart feels heavy. He doesn’t want me. Of course he doesn’t. He’s a… what is he, exactly? A demi-god? It’s of no consequence. He’s my soulmate, and the one thing I want more than anything in the world is to hold him close, and that’s just what I can’t do.

Second by excruciating second ticks by. He’s observing me, calculating. Suddenly, he slides up close. He takes my arm and holds my mark next to his. As they almost touch, they light up, like shining mother of pearl; greens and golds flicker over the skin in a sort of unchorepgraphed dance.

Loki looks up into my eyes. I can see a thousand questions forming. A spark, something new, before his face closes again, and he turns from me. It hits me then: he is just as confused and insecure as I am. I reach out: touch his shoulder gingerly, hoping I haven’t read him wrong.

He slumps forward. “How…?” he whispers, probably more to himself than me. “I… I’m not… I’m a monster…” Trailing off, he tries to step away again.

“Loki,” I repeat, tightening the hold on his shoulder. “Look at me. Please.”

He does, and I feel our souls spinning around each other, weaving and melting together. I don’t know what to say next, but he must see something in my eyes, because he pulls me close and buries his face in my hair.

“I found you,” he whispers, sounding like he doesn’t believe it, like I’m gonna disappear if he stays silent. “I found you.”

“No,” I whisper back. “I found you.”

When he finally lets go, the vulnerable expression is gone again. Old habits, I guess. He looks at me for a long time, like he’s trying to decipher every secret I’ve ever had. Eventually he smiles, a big, genuine grin, and says: “I don’t even know your name.”

“Oh, It’s Y/N,” I sputter, wishing I could be a bit more suave. But no. He’s gonna have to take my awkwardness too.

“A beautiful name for a beautiful lady,” he says, and my face heats up again. How come I’m so easily flustered when he looks almost unfazed by this? He looks me up and down. “It must have been a rough day for you. Are you hungry?”

“I could eat.”

“Very well. There is this wonderful restaurant just down the street. What do you say we place an order and get to know each other better?”

I swallow and nod, trying desperately to look like the woman destined to be by his side. But the way he speaks to me has my insides on fire. Maybe it’s the soulmate thing, or maybe it’s just been too long, but his every word feels silky smooth on my skin, and the pull in my chest shifts, sliding to my core. I swear I can hear myself sizzling.

_______________________________________________________________________

“We must find out what did this to you. Something happened, and if you could only remember –“

“Well, yeah, obviously something happened,” I reply, slurping my noodles and trying hard to suppress the eye roll that’s fighting its way to the surface. The ache in my body is making me impatient. “I didn’t do this to myself.”

Loki gives me sort of an annoyed smirk. He’s not used to being talked back to. “Obviously,” he mocks. “What isthe last thing you remember, then?”

I close my eyes and think back. It’s hard to concentrate when he’s so close to me, but I remind myself that I can’t continue to be awestruck by him. Doesn’t stop the weightlessness in my stomach, though.

Flashes of colour and movement and smells pop up in my mind, but nothing recognisable. I go further back, tracing my movements since I left the compound. For a moment I’m struck by how much I miss them all, but I also know I can’t go back. At least not yet.

A computer swims into view. The screen shows a picture of… My eyes snap open. “I was doing research,” I say so suddenly I startle him. Soda sloshes over the brim of his glass.

“On what?”

Yeah, that. I know I shouldn’t feel embarrassed, but saying it out loud is mortifying. “You.”

“Me?” The question comes out like a sharp chuckle.

Nodding, I grimace to try to hide my shame. “Mhm. You know, because of… of this situation.” I gesture to my soulmark then vaguely wave in the direction of his hand. “The… hm-hm… soulmate-thing.” It feels weird saying it out loud. Like I’m a sham.

“Right.” Loki absentmindedly closes his hand protectively over his wrist.

“I was, I was trying to find you.” Obviously. It’s harder to explain than I thought. What I want to say is: “I want to be with you – you have been in the back of my mind since I learned of your existence. You are my world.” But what I dosay is: “Figured it would be nice to, you know, meet you and… you know, get to know you, and all that.”

I feel like an idiot. Why can’t I be articulate and smart and a better match to Loki’s intellect? He must think I’m an imbecile.

“A logical thought,” he replies, but he doesn’t sound sarcastic. “Then what happened?”

“Um… I was knocked over the back of my head. I think. Someone… took me? I think I remember a car ride. It was bumpy. And loud.”

That seems to worry him. “Do you know who? Or why?”

Shaking my head hurts a little. “No. Sorry. Just… the button and tumbling through the portal.”

“That’s okay. We will no doubt uncover more pieces to the puzzle along the way.” He stuffs an entire dumpling into his mouth. “Ang ou gow by boher?”

I laugh out loud. “What?” This whole situation is absurd. What am I doing? Oh nothing, just having dinner with my soulmate who I just met, and he’s already talking with his mouth full of food. So domestic I’m tempted to check if I’m dreaming.

Swallowing, he picks up another dumpling, stopping before he puts it in his mouth. “And you know my brother.” It’s not a question any more.

My heart sinks. He’s not going to like my affiliations, but I can’t lie. Not now. “Mhm. All the Avengers, really. I’mkindaanavengermyself.” I leave it there, hovering like a mayfly over water.

The dumpling slips through his chopsticks. “Oh.” To his credit, he regains composure a hell of a lot faster than I would have done. “Then I apologise for trying to… subjugate you some years ago.” He says it with a wink, but there’s sincerity behind the joke.

“You’re forgiven. I think,” I joke back. “But I wasn’t on the team back then. I only joined a couple of years after the… incident. Someone told Fury of my powers.”

He tilts his head a bit, eyes bright. “And what are those?”

“Well, it’s not powers as such,” I say, wiping my mouth with a napkin. “But I have some precognitive abilities.”

Loki blinks and freezes with the chopstick halfway to his mouth. “You’re psychic?”

I shake my head fervently. “Oh no, not at all. I can just… sense… if something bad is going to happen. It is quite useful on missions; more of a heads up and keep on your toes kinda thing. But I never know whatis going to happen, it’s more of a gut feeling –“ I shut up. My stomach flips and I would write it off as the food, except for the slight change in the air. It’s too minute to put my finger on, but it’s there, and the feeling grows denser with every second. Shit!

“What is it?”

“It’s… I don’t know. Something is wrong. My estimate is three minutes by the feel of the surge in the air.”

_______________________________________________________________________

The window explodes, shards of glass scattering over the floor. The only reason I’m not impaled on them is Loki’s quick thinking. He shoved me under the table, sliding in after me, and he’s hunched over me, shielding me with his body. His armour clatters as it appears, covering him from head to toe.

Several people jump through the shattered window, crashing onto the kitchen floor. Some tiles crack from the impact. Black combat trousers over shiny, black boots surround the table, and my head spins. How… What do they want? I look up at Loki above me, and try to convey a heartfelt apology through my eyes alone. I brought them here. I should never have come.

Loki shakes his head slowly, his eyes twinkling with mischief. As his helmet grows, he moves with superhuman speed. The table flies through the room, taking at least three swat team members with it before it smashes into the wall.

“That’ll get Mrs. Davis in number four grumbling,” he says with a big grin. “Oh well, she’ll forgive me. She always does.”

Is he often attacked in his kitchen? I can’t do anything but roll my eyes as I straighten up and fall into a fighting stance. Even if this is an everyday occurrence for him, I’m going to do my best to protect him. All the hours in the compound gym are going to pay off now.

The madness is shining in his eyes as he flings a hand out; releasing a dagger that finds is target without trouble. His ease with killing is oddly comforting right now, and I am slightly shocked. But I don’t get many seconds to contemplate this new side of myself. One of the intruders descends on me, forcing me to take action. Grabbing the nearest thing I can get a hold of, I swing my fist around, slamming a decanter in his face. It’s probably worth a ton of money, but I doubt Loki minds, as the man shrieks in pain. A large shard sticks out from his cheek, just below his goggles. Hot, red blood is streaming down, staining both his jacket and my shirt, but I don’t feel sorry for him. I twist around, kicking him in the knee, sending him to the floor with a sickening crunch.

I risk a glance at Loki. He’s fighting like a cornered predator. Our attackers have some sort of shield or protection against his magic, and he has to resort to old-fashioned close combat. It’s a chilling sight.

The walls are creaking with each hit, plates and glasses and cutlery smash to the floor, creating an ear-splitting din that almost takes my vision away. That fraction of a second’s distraction is enough for one of the soldiers to grab my hair. Grunting, I try to twist around, but his grip is too strong, and with a flick of his hands and a soft kick to my shin, he forces me to the floor. A piece a glass cuts through my jeans and stabs my knee, and I whimper like a lost puppy, kicking myself internally for letting him get the upper hand.

The soft sound from me makes Loki stop what he’s doing. His dagger is stuck in his opponent’s kidney, but he loses his grip when he spots me on the floor. And just like that, the fight is over. Three soldiers clad in black camo advance on him, holding some sort of electric spears on him.

“Don’t,” I start, and is immediately shut off by a knife to my throat. Its sharp edge is balanced perfectly on my skin; stinging, but not drawing blood. I swallow hard.

A new man strolls into the kitchen from the living room, stepping unfazed over the bodies of his writhing and dead colleagues.

“Well, well… what have we here?” he asks, and I huff a scornful laugh at his so very villainous entrance. “Loki and his…” He looks at me. “…Unfortunate lady friend. You should have taken our advice. Instead you run straight to him. What were you hoping for, huh? Were you hoping to tame the savage?”

The man spits in Loki’s direction, but Loki doesn’t even flinch, though his face hardens ever so slightly. I doubt anyone but me notice. It’s kinda nice to see him strain to keep control of himself. I bite my lip to punish myself for thinking like that.

“Get out of my home!” His voice is icy and would send most men running. It’s a credit to these people’s training that they’re still standing and not sprinting down the road with their tails stuck between their legs.

The newcomer ignores Loki’s seething rage. “You will come with us, Master Silvertongue. Ah-ah,” he tuts, gesturing to my captor. He pushes the knife harder against my throat. The sting sends ticks to my eye, and I try hard not to swallow again. “Do as we tell you, or the girl will suffer.”

“Do as you wish, I care not.”

The man barks a laugh. “They call you the Liesmith. But you don’t fool me. We’ve already done our research.” He grabs my hand and twists my arm so that I almost fall forward. My eyes fly open. The fabric tears with a loud rrratch, exposing my soulmark. It’s still glowing faintly.

Loki’s eyes flicks from the man to me and back, and it’s good to see there’s still some fight left in his eyes, and his lips curl into that mischievous smile I’ve come to love. God, it’s really gone that far. My heart thumps loudly, and I feel my face prickle with the realisation that I won’t get the chance to fall in love with him slowly like a normal person. Trust me to go all in all at once.

The soldier keeps me pinned to the floor, grovelling like a commoner in court. Every time I move, pain from my knee shoots up my spine and erupts in bursts of colour over my eyes.

Forgotten memories flits in and out of my consciousness, and a voice rings in my ear, blocking out the incessant taunting and blathering. I don’t even flinch when one of Loki’s daggers imbeds itself in the cupboard with a loud thwack. You will be the one to bring us to him.

As the soldier behind me kicks me in the back, I can’t even groan in pain; the realisation hits me like a freight train, and I lift my head to look at Loki fighting for his life; for mine… This is all my fault!

For a brief moment our eyes lock together. I quickly look away so he doesn’t get distracted, but I know it’s too late. A loud groan and a thump make me look up again, and the sight sends chills down my spine.

Loki is kneeling, a mirror image of myself, and he is bleeding from his temple. Defeat and defiance glows in his eyes, and I know that he knows. His eyes soften and my insides turn. They shackle his hands and pull him backwards to the door, a lot less gently than necessary.

“I will find you again,” I croak. Something hard hits the back of my head, and the floor comes rushing upwards. The last thing on my mind before the void swallows me is “I promise.”

When I wake up, I wonder why my face is smushed against the floor and how much I drank to warrant this level of a hangover, but when I move to wipe the sleep from my eyes, my hand comes away bloody. My left eye is so swollen I can’t open it properly and everything hurts.

Hesitantly I feel my nose. Relief floods me when I find it not broken. But lying face down on the floor with my ass up in the air has left it bruised and sore.

“Fuck!” I don’t really have the words, but I curse the pain and the world and the people who took Loki from me even before we could get to know each other.

_______________________________________________________________________

I hesitate. Pick up the phone and dial the number, then hang up for the fifth time. It’s clear I need help, but the tiny voice in the back of my head keeps reminding me that they don’t like Loki. They reallydon’t like Loki. But they like me, even though I left abruptly four years ago and have barely spoken to any of them since.

Steve sends me updates from time to time, and every few weeks he shoots a message begging me to come home, but I just couldn’t. I feared the day they’d find out the truth. And that day… is propelling towards me at an alarming speed. Might as well get it over with. If I’m lucky they’ll help me before disowning me. Wait, is it really disowningwhen the family in question isn’t blood related? I slap myself out of the distraction. It doesn’t matter. The universe has already dealt my cards. It has been decided, and I may not like it, but there it is. I have to play the hand I’m given.

With a shaky thumb I dial the number again. The green button looks like a great big danger sign, but this time my resolve holds. The phone rings two times before someone answer.

“Y/N?” Steve’s voice is equal parts relieved and worried.

“Hiya, Cap,” I reply, feeling incredibly small. I try to keep my voice light, but it’s impossible to conceal my desperation. It’s been years since I’ve talked to him, and I’m so nervous I could puke.

There’s voices in the background, someone’s dragging a chair over the floor – probably Tony, I think before swallowing that hard lump in my throat. I’m really doing this. Now.

“Hang on,” Steve says and there’s a sharp beep. “You’re on speaker.”

“I’m impressed you know the right button,” a voice shoots, and I smile despite myself. I miss Natasha so much.

Steve scoffs and mutters something unintelligible. Multiple voices laughing. Great. The whole gang is there. My heart is beating so hard I can feel my sweater move.

“Y/N, you there?”

“I’m here,” I whisper shakily. “Fuck, I miss you guys so much!” There. It’s said. Whatever comes next at least they know it’s not their fault I left. Stupid universe.

“We miss you too, kid. Come home.” Tony sounds uncharacteristically vulnerable.

I shake my head as if they can see me. “I can’t, sorry. Not yet,” I add, even though I should say not ever.But that’s too much right now. I don’t even want to think about it, so I try to sound confident. “I need help.”

“Anything!”

They wouldn’t be so eager if they knew what I’m about to ask for. My eyes start burning, and I rub them hard. The prickly sensation is replaced by a dull ache and thousands of kaleidoscope stars.

“I might… might have to hold you to that. I…” I sigh. “I don’t know how to begin.”

“What’s wrong?” Steve asks, before Nat interrupts.

“This has to do with why you ran away, right?”

Ran away.As if I’m a child running from strict parents. But she’s right, of course. She always seems to know what’s going on. There’s a pointed silence on the other side.

Clearing my throat, I study a bloodstain on the floor. It’s dark brown and almost perfectly round. It doesn’t feel real. Nothing feels real anymore. “Sort of, yeah,” I begin. My voice is hollow. How do you go about explaining to your family that you’re in love with – no, more than that: irrevocably tied to a guy who has tried to kill them on more than one occasion? Gently, or rip off the band-aid?

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I close my eyes and bang the back of my head on the wall. “I found out who my soulmate is... It’s Loki.” I grimace, waiting for the inevitable outburst of disgust from the other side.

There’s silence, then a loud “Aww, shit.”

“Hey, Clint.”

“Hey, Y/N. When are you coming home? Ow!” There’s a soft thwack. Someone, probably Natasha, has hit the back of his head.

No one says anything for a while. The only sound heard is the rustling of paper, a scraping chair, and something that sounds suspiciously like a giggle.

I’m getting antsy. Someone needs to say something. “Um, guys?”

“Yeah, yeah, uh, we’re still here. Just… had to settle something.” Steve sounds smug. “So. What do you need?”

What? This is not the reaction I expected. “Uh… you still want to help me?” I wince from my own voice. It’s so small and terrified, and it makes me disgusted from myself.

“Still want to… what the hell? Y/N! I thought you knew us better than that. You’re family.”

“But…” I can’t bring myself to say it out loud, but my thoughts spring to the fight Steve and Tony had when we found out Bucky was still alive.

“We’ve grown since that,” Steve answers to my unspoken thoughts. “We’re older and wiser now.”

“Speak for yourself, Captain Senior Citizen,” Tony injects, making everyone laugh.

My head is spinning.

“What do you need?” a quiet voice repeats, and my heart aches. Of all the people on the team, Bucky is the one I miss the most. He’s like a brother, a twin, almost, and I miss the comfortable silences between us. My heart bleed with guilt that I didn’t think I could tell him.

My voice cracks from the fear and sorrow and homesickness. “They took him. They took him from me and I couldn’t stop them. I need to find him, I need…” My voice trails off, leaving me in a bottomless pit of terror and what-ifs.

“Of course,” Nat says, and I picture the glance she sends to Clint. She knows how I feel. “I’ll come pick you up. The jet is ready for take-off.”

Smiling sadly to the phone, I shake my head. “Thank you. But I’m… I’m not even sure where…”

“We know where you are,” Tony says.

“What?”

“This is Stark we’re talking about,” Steve explains with a tiny chuckle. “Did you really think we’d let you wander off without backup?”

I don’t know whether I should be offended or relieved, so I laugh with him. “But how come –“

“Figured you wanted to be left alone,” Clint says. “And since you don’t like climbing the vents, well… We always have your back.”

Three hours later Clint greets me happily as I step out of the elevator. I’ve missed his hugs and positive pessimism.

“Y/N! It’s good to see you again,” he says as he lets go, keeping a firm grip on the coffee pot he’s using as a mug.

“You too,” I sign with a grin, wincing slightly when the smile tugs on a cut under my lip. Nodding to the coffee pot, I add: “Good to see nothing has changed.”

He tries to sign a reply, but spills coffee all over his shirt. “Aww, my coffee…”

I can’t help but laugh. “You know, if you drank it like normal people you’d probably have a lot less stained shirts.”

He looks between me and his shirt. “Well, when you say it like that, I feel a little stupid.”

Bucky is leaning on the wall when I enter the kitchen. One leg bent and his arms crossed over his chest. If I didn’t know better, I’d be scared. But skilled as he is in… assassinating people, he’ll never hurt me or anyone else he considers his family. When he sees me, his face lights up, but as I come closer, he scowls.

“Who did this to you?” His voice is low and menacing, and he reaches out to touch my black eye. “Did he –“

I shake my head frantically. “Calm down, Bucky. Loki would never – they did this. The ones who… who…” My voice cracks, and I can’t finish the sentence.

Bucky pulls me into a warm hug, and the moment my face hits his chest I start bawling. Every fear, every bit of frustration, all the anger I’ve swallowed the last few hours comes flooding out. I’m powerless to stop it. “What if… they kill him?” I sob, sniffing hard and almost inhaling Bucky’s shirt.

He stiffens for a brief moment, then relaxes again. “They won’t,” he says, sounding so confident I almost believe him. “If they wanted him dead they would’ve killed him on sight. Trust me.”

_______________________________________________________________________

We’re all gathered in the briefing room. Wanda looks at me, seeking permission to do what I’ve already asked her to. I nod again, and her eyes start to glow. My mind is whisked away in a red whirlwind. Images and pieces of conversation float to the surface before dipping back down. It hurts to be restrained like this, but I’ll endure anything if it can help me bring Loki back.

When she lets go of me, I collapse, and I would have crashed to the floor if Steve hadn’t been there to catch me. He lowers me gently into a chair, and someone hands me a glass of water.

As Wanda describes what she saw – she’s considerate enough to leave out all the irrelevant stuff – the rest of the team gapes. I don’t hear it all, but I catch enough to understand that there’s a vigilante group that consists of former S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, and that they’ve been after Loki for years. Something about bringing him to justice.

“I’ve heard about these guys,” Clint says and everyone turns. He fakes bashfulness and toes the floor before continuing. “I hear things. When you’re up high people tend to forget you’re there.”

“Out of sight, out of mind,” Bruce mutters, and I nod to him.

Clint scratches the scab off a cut on his nose. “They’re supposed to be shut down. According to the guys in the administration, S.H.I.E.L.D. nipped it in the bud before they could even meet up for the first time.”

“Well, apparently not.”

“And now these men has my brother?” Thor booms. He’s eager to get out there and find Loki, and for that I’m grateful. At least I’m not completely on my own in this. It’s just that we don’t know what we’re dealing with. If they’ve gotten their hands on portal tech…

_______________________________________________________________________

“Stand back!” Nat attaches the explosives to the wall while Bucky and I take cover. Thor takes a step to the side.

Ten seconds later the corridor lights up in an impressive display of yellows and oranges. I have to close my eyes to not go blind. When the spectacle dies down there’s a big hole where the wall once was, three guards on the floor, covered in rubble, and a very dusty and very confused Loki standing in the middle of the room. In one hand he has a dripping dagger. The other dagger is imbedded in the back of one of the guards.

“Brother!” Thor bellows, bounding over the piles of concrete and steel. Apparently one of the guards is still alive, because he lets out a muffled yelp as Thor steps on his stomach.

“Hello, Thor,” Loki greets coldly. He acts annoyed, but we can all see he’s pleased to see him again. “Get off me!” he grumbles when Thor picks him up, swinging him around like a child, sending dust flying everywhere.

Loki’s eyes are fixed on me the whole time, so I do the first thing I can think of: I give him a little wave, feeling slightly like Scotty in Star Trek when he can’t do the Vulcan salute.

“My apologies,” Thor says, following Loki’s eyes. He shoves him in my direction. “That was selfish of me.”

I try to tell him that it’s okay. We’ve got all the time in the world now that we’re together again, but my voice is gone. Only Loki exists at the moment.

“Ahem.” Bucky clears his throat, bringing us both out of our reverie. “You do know that if you do know that if you break her heart all of the Avengers will rain fire and sulphur over you, right?” He gives Loki his signature death scowl.

Loki nods once. “I would expect nothing less.”

Nat grabs my hand to get my attention. “Um, guys? Clint says he’s ready with the quinjet. We better hurry. The place will be crawling with guards soon, as much as we all love fighting, we’ve got a schedule to keep.”

“Yes, Mom,” I tease, sticking out my tongue, but I’m ready to leave.

Climbing back over the fallen wall, we hurry through the long, winding corridors; Bucky and Natasha in front, and Thor making up the rear guard.

Suddenly cold fingers entwine with my own. Heart in my throat, I glance over to my right. Loki’s eyes are glittering, and he’s smiling from ear to ear. “Hello,” he says quietly, lifting my hand to his lips. The kiss is brief, and soft, and sets off sparks in my belly.

“Told you I’d come find you,” I reply, slightly out of breath. I’m not sure it’s because we’re running.

_______________________________________________________________________

Because you asked for it, I’m tagging you:

@river-alice-wolf @oatballsoffury @80percentmarvel @kybaeza @tardis-is-mine @darkforestbl0g and also @schwarzwaelder-kirschtorte , because I tag you in all my stories.

#loki x reader #oneshot #everyone lives #soulmates #loki laufeyson #mcu sort of?#I found you #fluff #angst #writing is hard

121 notes · View notes

nancywheelxr · 4 years

Note

Hello, I read doors open like arms and I absolutely loved it! It was the first time I read a fanfic where Hela was not just a stereotypical villain, but her reasons were somewhat explained, which was great. Also, the Loki-Thor dynamic is amazing, really realistic (to me) and great to read. There is just one problem, though... Now I got invested in your story and I desperately need continuation, does Hela attack, maybe she joins brothers against Thanos... Pretty please?

Hey there, thank you so much! I loved writing that fic and hearing this is seriously making my whole week, anon! I do plan to write more of it, ideally fixing the whole Infinity War-Endgame mess, so maybe subscribe to that fic on AO3 to keep an eye out for updates, but while I hammer out the details of that, here is a small interlude of what happens next:

Odin's funeral comes and goes like the flaming arrow that lights up his boat: swiftly and with a blazing streak across the skies that remains burned into Loki's eyelids long after the after images should have faded.

The hollowness that sits hungrily on his chest follows its lead, clawing behind his ribs and demanding his attention.

In any case, it's on his nature to be contrary, so Loki firmly ignores it and pointedly does not try to untangle the knot of emotions that weighs him down. Instead, he chooses to focus on another absence at the dinner table.

"Now," he says, staring at the murals they have not yet decided what to do with– painting over them feels wrong, but leaving them in the open feels just as upsetting. Loki has half a mind to demolish the whole thing. "This is just getting ridiculous."

"Maybe she hasn't noticed yet," Thor murmurs beside him, quieter than Loki's ever heard him. "Maybe she thinks he still lives."

“You don’t believe that,” he scoffs.

“You don’t believe that,” replies Thor, sullenly. It’s been five minutes since they’ve last encountered some nobleman or other seeking either pointless answers or having some entirely uninteresting news to report. Loki is beginning to grow suspicious; in his time on the throne, five minutes of solitude had been a rare blessing.

“It doesn’t matter what I believe in,” Loki waves him off, glancing away from these dreadful paintings. His stomach rolls unpleasantly. “This will not fix itself and neither of us has been to see her in days.”

Thor bristles. “Father has–”

The words die on his throat, halted with a crushing grief that Loki wants to be about as far away as possible. Thor’s sentimentality has a way of catching. And yet, he finds himself foolishly rooted to the floor. “I know,” he says, voice unwillingly softer, “I know, I don’t mean it accusingly. But we need to deal with Hela, sooner rather than later.”

With a weary sigh, Thor drags a hand across his face. “Something also needs to be done about these murals, I hate the sight of them,” he shakes his head as if that could dispel all the wrong that seems to have settled over their lives as of late. “No matter! This shall wait while we pay our sister a long overdue visit!”

Long overdue might be a little exaggerated, but at least Thor has seen the wisdom on his suggestion. Allowing Hela to stew on her own, to make her plans with only her half of the story, well– they all saw how that turned out for him in the past. For everyone, in fact, and–

“My king,” a servant bows demurely, looking nervously between the two of them, and Loki has seen enough of this to know the Bifrost will be carrying only one of them today. “Lord Asmund has asked for your counsel over a disagreement among the Council.”

“I– thank you,” Thor says, clearing his throat, “but I’m afraid I’m far too busy at the moment, tell the Council I’ll be with them shortly, as soon as I have returned.”

The itch to smack his brother across the head is great, but somehow, Loki finds it in himself to wait until the servant has scurred away. Too dangerous to do anything undermining to his brother’s rule so soon into his regency. “Don’t be daft,” he rolls his eyes, scowls, “you can’t afford to slight your Council this early, especially considering the current affronts you’ve made against their wishes.”

“What,” it brings him up short and Loki raises one eyebrow, unimpressed, spreads his hands as if to gesture himself.

“Do you truly think they want me here, brother?” He sighs, “they will not be happy about Hela either. In fact, it would be in your best interests to exile the two us before the whole court sees you taking in yet another monster.”

The smack across his head comes as a shocking surprise. “Have you lost your mind? Or perhaps you wish to lose that hand?!”

“I will tolerate no insults to my family,” Thor replies calmly, smugly, “much less coming from my family.”

Loki glowers, far too much happening for him to keep track. That, too, he ignores violently. Instead, he focuses on his irritation. “You’re a fool and I will remind you I warned you now when this inevitably leads to disaster.”

Thor laughs. “Of course you will, brother. Now, let’s go see our sister.”

“No,” he says, haughtily pushing him towards the hallway the servant had disappeared back into, “I will go see Hela alone while you see to your Council.”

Perhaps, had he had the chance, Thor might have protested, but as it is, by the time he realizes an illusion has been telling him that, Loki is nearly too far to hear his enraged cry, the glittering of the rainbow bridge already twinkling in the distance.

Helheim is still as dreadful as ever, greying and dark, and Loki hates this place more than on principle. A thousand years here, it’s a miracle Hela has clung to any shreds of sanity– it makes him wonder what did Odin think of the future; he locked her here and then what? Did the old man think he would live forever?

“Why have you come this time, little brother?” Hela’s voice is standoffish and cool, uninterested down to the vowels. Loki firmly does not listen to the faint voice in his head, so much like Frigga’s, pointing out how much alike she sounds to him right now.

They did not grow up together nor even heard stories of each other and yet, a stranger in the streets would certainly mistake them for siblings after listening for five minutes.

“That’s not the right question now, is it?” He hums, turning around to see Hela lounging in a conjured throne with Fenrir at her feet. She looks well, less pale than before, less hungry, less like a lingering ghost. More solid, more real. It should probably be more frightening than he feels it is.

Hela snorts, rolling her eyes. “I suppose you expect me to ask next what it is, then,” she cards her fingers through grey fur, unsettlingly in good spirits, “very well, I’ll humor you this once– what should I be asking?”

He narrows his eyes in suspicion for a second before deciding to go for a milder approach. “The real question is not why am I here, but why are you?”

Her good mood vanishes at his words. “Where else would I be?”

“The Allfather is gone,” he points out needlessly, gestures the barren landscape around them, “you don’t have to stay here anymore.”

“Indeed,” she says, “and I daresay Odin would just love to see me leaving my prison now that he is gone to bring Asgard down. No, I don’t think so. I’m not playing into his games anymore.”

“There are more choices besides staying here or destroying an entire realm, you know.”

Her eyes flash dangerously. “If you think I’ll return to that place in chains, a prisoner where once I ruled, you are terribly wrong. A gilded cage is still a cage and at least here, I don’t have to withstand those ancient fools prattling about.”

Loki studies her for a moment, taking the chance to collect his thoughts; this is the first time he’s on this side of this speech, you see. In hindsight, perhaps he should have let Thor come along, he certainly has more experience handling this.

Oh well, it’s not like he can say she is wrong, he supposes.

“Thor would say Asgard is not a cage,” he says, “and ask you to come home immediately. He’s a bit upset you missed the funeral.”

“That one is a fool,” Hela waves him off, “am I to understand you are here to do the same?”

“No, I like to think I know better,” Loki shrugs, dusting off his armor to prepare himself for the travel back. Nothing more to do here today, better not to rush her. “You’re right in one matter, sister– the court truly is full of decrepit imbeciles.”

Fenrir lifts his head lazily, tail wagging once as Hela laughs, and Loki calls for Heimdall, allowing the blaze of light to sweep him back home.

“Where’s Hela?” Thor frowns, breaking off from where he had been talking with the Warriors Three and the distance does nothing to soften Sif’s distrustful glare. Fair enough.

“In her prison,” he answers calmly, not bothering to stop but slowing his steps, “although she seems to have regained her full power. I think I saw some trees there this time.”

“What?” Thor makes a face, “does she know–”

“Yes, she’s aware.”

“And she wants to stay where she is?”

Loki thinks of the depressing landscape, Fenrir’s tail blowing thin dust into the air each time it hit the ground, the unnatural taste of the forever dim lights. No one wants to stay stuck in an eternal twilight, at the edge of a nightmare. “No, she does not.”

“No, she does n– you are making no sense, brother,” Thor sighs, huffs, and he looks very tired, worn like Loki has never seen him. Even in his worst days as King, Loki can’t remember looking so exhausted, old. Then again, he didn’t care half as much, didn’t want much more than keeping the peace and send those blasted stones about as far as he could trust someone to hide them.

And, well, if he’s being honest, he had never expected to reign for so long. A few months, maybe, but not years. Thor, he expects, has millenniums to look forward to.

Good thing neither of them is a seer, truly.

“Give it time,” he offers, catching sight of some harried lord of other he never bothered to learn the name, and ducks into a different hallway, parting ways to return to his room. Still, he calls behind his shoulder, “and stop avoiding your meetings!”

“You again,” Hela purses her lips. Today, Fenrir is off chasing rabbits; if he pays attention, Loki thinks he can hear the anguished cries and the tear of fur and flesh.

“Me again,” he agrees cheerily, taking a seat into the newly made garden. It looks a little like Frigga’s, if less gentle, less idyllic. Wilder, actually, with poison ivies strangling trees and roots upending the earth. “You will not believe what happened today.”

“Do tell, but only if it’s interesting,” she says, watching flies buzz around, a dead bird attracting the lot of them. “How fares our dear brother in the throne?”

“Surprisingly not disastrously,” Loki admits, “do you want to hear it or not?”

“Not particularly. Since I so clearly am not going to be the queen, why should I care for Asgard?” Her tone is cavalier, dismissive, but he hears the undercurrent of hurt there, the spiteful resignation– yes, she wouldn’t be Odin’s blood-thirsty monster, wouldn’t give him the satisfaction, wouldn’t wreak the havoc he had expected her to, but at what cost? She’s making a garden out of her prison, but he wonders how much of herself is she losing with these illusions?

How much change until there’s nothing of yourself left?

He shakes his head. “It’s where your power comes from, is it not?”

“In a way,” she nods, “doesn’t mean I have to be embroiled into whatever court nonsense has you into such a tirade.”

Fenrir comes lumbering back, muzzle dripping with blood and tail wagging happily, more dog than feral beast. Loki turns his nose in disgust, huffs. “I feel I am the only one with sense in that place.”

“It would not come as a surprise. You seem to have some intelligence, I could not say the same for the rest of the court.”

“Thank you, sister, for the glowing endorsement,” he drawls, rolling his eyes, then– a thought. “You should come home, help me help them not to run the city to the ground.”

Hela laughs. “I thought you were going to tell me a story, little prince.”

“Tonight there is a feast, will you come?”

“No, I don’t think I will,” says Hela, and Fenrir darts past them, a bloodied deer in his maw, still twitching every other second. “Will you attend?”

Loki grins, settling in one of the benches with the pile of books he had brought with him today. “People will certainly see me there.”

Hela rolls her eyes but picks one of the tomes. The poor lighting is terrible for reading, nothing a few witch lights can’t fix.

“Thor has a room made for you,” Loki points out, “it was garish at first, of course, but I had it redecorated.”

“Tell me, then, little brother, do these quarters come with how many guards at my door?”

“No guards, no,” he shrugs, “but I expect the Council will try to riddle it with spies. They certainly tried with mine.”

Hela hums. “Of course. I’d turn them inside out and leave their entrails at the door. Or perhaps their heads in a spike?”

“I would think you’d sick Fenrir on them.”

“He deserves better than a traitor’s flesh.”

“Does that mean you are coming?”

“That means I would rather be left alone.”

“It’s been a fortnight, will you come home now?”

“No. Be careful with the nightshade, it’s been wilting lately.”

“Thor has been asking for you, he’s convinced the Council you will not be a threat to the Realm. No more than I, in any case. Will you come home?”

“I’m offended, I will not.”

It takes half a season for Thor to finally grow too impatient with his visits and if he’s being honest, Loki is only surprised it took him this long to corner him outside his room. “You’re off to see Hela again, aren’t you?”

“I did say I would take care of the situation, didn’t I?” He raises one eyebrow, eyeing his displeased scowl.

“Yes, yes, but,” Thor glares, sour to the bone, “you haven’t been to a Council meeting in forever! Maybe we should let her come to us when she is ready, give up on these fruitless visits.”

Loki rolls his eyes, crossing his arms. “What do you think I have been doing? You try convincing the Goddess of Death to do anything. She keeps conjuring the most hideous plants for her garden, but I believe I’m close to getting her to lose the corpse flowers.”

“Losing the–”

“You won’t want to know, they smell terrible, really, like rotting flesh. Even the blasted wolf hates it.”

Thor looks like he might want to protest or perhaps inquire further on Hela’s awful gardening plans, or, more likely, to question him again on what they’ve been discussing, but a servant interrupts them again, reminding Thor of a meeting he seems to be almost late to. Good thing, really, that Loki has arranged for the staff to keep these reminders coming. It wouldn’t do for their king to be late, it gives time for gossip and scheming to brew.

And if the distrust, the suspicion Loki might be the one plotting behind Thor’s back with Hela to– what? Destroy Asgard? Kill their brother? – well, it might sting, yes, but it’s not like he can blame him, not in light of the past decade, even the past few months.

Still, Loki excuses himself cooly, trying not to allow unfair resentments to claw at his throat.

“If they are all constantly suspicious of you,” Hela says, a frown so much like Thor’s on her brow, “and it bothers you so, then why stay? You know the pathways between worlds, why not slip away from their petty grievances?”

Loki can’t help snorting; only Hela would call his crimes petty.

And yet, her question, as they often do, gives him pause. Why did he stay? He could have gone anywhere in the universe, thrown the tesseract in the nearest wormhole and run in the other direction. It wouldn’t have hidden him from the Titan, not forever, but neither will Asgard– which reminds him, he will have to warn his brother of this soon: Thanos’ madness will not spare their home, not even if Loki were a thousand miles away, if the Tesseract were a thousand miles away.

Soon isn’t today, though, so instead, he allows himself to faintly prod at the tangled knots of emotions he had been ignoring these past months. If he were someone else, someone more prone to feelings and such, he might say he stayed because pushing everything away had become too tiring on his shoulder, because he had died once, nearly twice, and when you die for somewhere, for someone, that has to count for something, because more often than not it feels like never stopped falling, but in Asgard, it’s easier to pretend there’s solid ground beneath his feet.

Because running away has only ever made things worse, so he chose to stay for once, is choosing to stay, and sometimes, he thinks it might be the same as choosing his family and that could be enough because it’s on purpose.

“Because it’s worth it,” he tells Hela at last and watches her consider his words carefully, hesitant as she absently pets Fenrir, eyes far away to the sky like she’s seeing golden and blue instead of dulling greys. When she says nothing, he adds softly, “will you come home and see it for yourself?”

This time when he calls for Heimdall and the Bifrost strikes from the sky, the Guardian is there, steady and dependable, to welcome him home along with Hela, her ridiculously large wolf, and the stupid cactus in a yellow vase she carries in her hands.

#loki #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #thor odinson #hela odinsdottir #thor ragnarok #mcu #marvel #look an ask #loki and thor brotp #loki and hela brotp

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lothirielswanmarvel · 4 years

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Love & Blue Lips [12]

Continue the journey of Avengers: Love and Lightning here, part II of new series, The Collector’s Cosmic Romance Saga! Love, fortune and glory to you!!

~*~

“Loki?” I stammered out his name. It felt weird to say his name and actually address him; I was more used to the Loki who lived inside the Avengers’ jokes.

The god of Mischief’s emerald eyes glimmered. He took an emphasized step away from me. “Ugh—I would suggest making use of a breath mint, or incense.”

I frowned, and forced myself to sit up on the center of the bed. I should've been alarmed, but I was too tired for that kind of effort. I looked around. The black cat was gone.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

“Keeping my brother away from Loki Land—A-Asgard, I mean Asgard,” Loki corrected himself in a very diplomatic manner. “I heard of what transpired on Alfheim. I can't let Asgard be invaded during its new golden era, we’re prospering! I’m still writing The Tragedy of Loki of Asgard—”

“Wait a minute,” Something clicked in my clouded mind. I really had to focus to catch it in time. “You’re the one responsible for Heimdall? What are you doing to Asgard—? Mmph!”

Loki clamped a hand against my mouth, which was ice cold. He jerked it away afterwards. He held his tainted hand away from his body, “I must wash my hands. Please excuse me for a moment,”

I let myself fall back onto the bed and listened to the curious sounds of Loki washing his hands one room over. He still talked to me, expecting me to listen over the roar of the faucet, “I’ve seen the way my brother looks at you. I cannot let you marry Asta; you are the only thing that will keep him away from Asgard. Also...I believe that you’re a healthy choice for him. He's chosen some dreadful ones in the past, Amora included. You’re a nice change...you’re good for him.”

I stared at Loki upside down when he came out. He was gently massaging his hands with a towel, then held up the beige piece of fabric in disgust and flung it back into the other room.

“Aww, you really do care about him—why is it so hot in here?” I complained and stripped off my socks.

“That’s the fever. Mortals are such fragile beings—here,” Loki sat down beside me and took my hands in his. He softly blew cold air on my skin. I could see the frosty mist with my own eyes, similar to the fog from the other night. The room seemed to grow colder. I felt a chilling layer of frost on my knuckles.

“Is that a frost giant thing?” I asked out loud. A cough erupted from my chest at the end, along with an instinct that told me my question wasn't something to ask outright.

Loki nodded slowly and solemnly. He snatched a tissue box from the nightstand and offered it to me politely. He waited until my coughing fit had died down to continue, “Yes...at least Thor finally scored one with a head on their shoulders. Alright, Amora’s clever, but I'm the only one allowed to wear green, here. That woman oversteps her bounds.”

“Yeah. She takes up your spotlight quite a bit.”

Loki scowled at me. He threw a quick glance at the door. “We have company. You cannot let Amora take the Eternal Flame, which would be a very good symbol for Asgard’s golden era. I might steal it from Gerd afterwards—”

I heard footsteps outside. Loki spoke more quickly now. I could barely keep up, “—damn, the oaf is here. You have to seduce him somehow, and keep him far, far away from Asgard. I have no idea what he finds attractive here,” he gestured at all of me, “but when he walks through that door, you better make yourself an offering to the gods—chop chop, go be a human sacrifice.”

“Ew. Please stop trying to be my matchmaker.”

Loki didn't reply. He shrunk down in a cloud of green mist. The black cat from earlier took his place, staring at me with a look that clearly stated, ‘you will not mess this up, human.’

I looked up as the door creaked open. Even in my dull, sickened state, my heart fluttered when Thor popped his head in. “Hi.”

I tried to avoid staring directly into his eyes. The embarrassment of everything that had happened in the last twenty-four hours seemed to amplify when he was in the room.

“Hey,” I cleared my throat, “be careful, I have the plague.”

Thor ignored my warning, creeping further into the doorway. He held up a paper bag, “I brought soup, and some oddly-shaped pastries.”

The cat shot me a look, as if that proved his point about something. I didn't really care. Soup sounded nice. I managed to pull myself back into a sitting position. I was going to be an adult about this. “Thank you, Thor. That's very sweet of you.”

Thor finally entered the room and closed the door softly behind him. As he walked in, he paused. “It's cold in here.”

I spared another glance at the cat/god of mischief/my new matchmaker. He tried to appear innocent. “Yeah. I think the heater’s broken.”

Should I have said something about Loki the Cat? I was too sick to comprehend the answer. I didn't want to deal with it right now.

Thor handed me the bag and scratched Loki the Cat underneath the chin. “Looks like you have good company.”

“Mrow.”

Thor grinned when the cat answered. I just shot it a foul look, “It’s okay. I’m more of a dog person.”

Loki the Cat’s ears flattened.

I removed the soup from the paper bag. When I glanced in, I identified the weirdly-shaped pastries as croissants. I settled back against the headboard of the bed.

“Here, let me,”

“Oh, um, thanks.” Thor situated the pillows behind me as I eased back. My breath caught in my throat when he leaned in close.

“Your lips are blue.”

“What?”

“Your lips are blue, it’s too cold in here,” Thor glanced around. “I don't see any more blankets. Would you like me to lie with you?”

I choked on my first try of the soup, which was actually an herbal delight. I was too busy trying to process what I had just heard. “You want to...lie with me?”

Why would he lie? That’s more Loki’s thing. Something seems amiss here…

Then it finally hit me. “Oh! Sure, if you want—wait, I don't want you to get sick.”

“I'm a god, Evie. Sickness trembles before me,” Thor slipped in next to me and pulled the covers over us. Already he was trapping the heat inside. Between the soup and his closeness, being sick wasn't nearly as bad as I thought.

It was impossible to be uncomfortable in Thor’s presence. I’d forgotten all formalities and professionalism as I snuggled into his side. Thor’s hoodie was much more comfortable against my skin than his armor. He wrapped an arm around me and found a remote on the dresser, “Would you like to watch something?”

“Okay.”

Most of the channels were in french, but it didn't matter. Thor settled on a french soap opera (I think), although the television felt more like background noise.

I was halfway through the soup by now. “This is really good, thank you for bringing this.”

“Of course.” His arm tightened around me. “Evie, I'm sorry about earlier. About Amora.”

I froze. My hunger melted away. I shook my head as I packaged the soup back up and put it away. “Don't. It's not your fault.”

“It is. She hurt you, and I will not allow that to stand.” Thor insisted.

“Don't worry about it, please, I just want to forget the whole thing. I don't even know what I did to piss her off,” I pleaded and looked up at him.

“I don't think that's part of it.” Thor said. “She hurt you because...she knows I like you.”

I blinked a few times. Was I becoming delusional? “You do?”

“Yes, I do.” His whispered confirmation sent a shiver through me. It shouldn't have shocked me so much to hear it out loud. I wasn't expecting the reveal during my plague outbreak, either.

“Even with the puke and snot balls? Seriously?”

“The cute little red nose, too,” Thor added with a smile.

Blue lips, red nose. Am I a poem or a cautionary tale?

I smiled back, “I really like—” I was interrupted by a fit of coughing. My face burned from ruining the moment. “I'm sorry, that wasn't very smooth.”

I took a deep breath and tried again. “I really like you, too.”

Thor’s lips split into the hugest smile I had seen yet. “Even with the arrogance and ex-lovers?”

“The cute little red cape, too,” I insisted.

Thor’s hand caressed my cheek as he leaned down. Our lips met.

It was gentle, which surprised me. Even with the scratch of Thor’s beard, his lips seemed to softly caress mine with kisses. I felt a wave of intimacy—that sounded stupid, since it was kissing, but I felt something deep about it. Something just...right.

My arms were locked around Thor’s neck and I still managed to run my fingers against his scalp. His breath came out harder, almost a hiss. The warmth made my mouth tingle.

Thor parted from me suddenly, grimacing. “Ah...you are definitely sick.”

My eyes widened and I instinctively covered my mouth. I started to wiggle out of his grasp when he pulled me back in, close.

“I don't care,” He murmured, and his lips crashed back onto mine.

“I'm really loving this, but I might need a break to breathe, you know, because I'm sick.”

“—Right, yes, of course. And, Evie?”

“Yeah?”

He grinned. “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

~Author’s Note~

*Loki the Cat sighs at the edge of the bed, flipping through french soap operas with the remote*

Scott Lang: Aww, that's so sweet c: that is so true love!!!

Tony Stark: Eww, that's so disgusting. That is so unhygienic!!!

Wanda Maximoff: I love them, but I wanna spray them with a Lysol can so bad.

Vision: This scene is a true testimony to love. It isn't all of the romantic moments under perfect circumstances. It is loving one another despite imperfections, and it is beautiful.

Shuri: ...But it's still disgusting.

Author: Hia Awesome Adventurers!! Hope you enjoyed the blossoming of our new little romance c: more fun scenes to come! Love, fortune and glory to you!!

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evien-stark · 4 years

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✧I Need You✧ Chapter 58

While it may not have been wise, Thor’s need for open space to transport Loki home- Asgard, you quickly reminded yourself- led you to Central Park. Some people were still to wrapped up in taking care of themselves, or perhaps wondering simply what the fuck had just happened . But many were starting to gather in small circles to themselves. Taking pictures, videos. Whispering. Wondering if these were the heroes who had just saved not just the city, but the planet.

You were wondering much the same yourself.

It seemed too soon for goodbyes. You’d only met Thor … what, like ten hours ago? The thought alone was shocking. How fast everything had happened. All seemingly in the blink of an eye. Which made it that much easier to realize you didn’t want him to leave just yet. Especially not to a place you had no ability to reach. No way to communicate with him. He was part of your team now. And maybe not just that. Maybe you also wanted to have a way to make sure Loki not only got what was coming to him, but was going to be contained as well. You’d have to take Thor’s word for it.

Technically you already had, as you’d told a high ranking government official to piss off over it. Oh well.

When he turned to you, the last of his farewells, you stepped up. You’d already imposed with a perhaps ill-timed hug on the battlefield. But this time he obliged you by drawing you in first for a squeeze. Though you’d only just met him, he was sweetly familiar to you already. And when he drew back he laid a hand on your shoulder. “This was your first battle, correct?”

“That bad, huh?” That he could tell such a thing. Maybe on the helicarrier he’d had time to read your file. You still had to check into that, to see what it was SHIELD was saying about you.

But he shook his head. “Quite the contrary. You fought bravely. It was an honor. Your people are lucky to have you.”

While bravely wasn’t exactly good, you took the compliment for what it was, smiling at him. “Your people, too, you know? Look around.” Gesturing behind you to the people waiting. Waiting for anything. Acknowledgement. A sign. And as he looked to them, some cheered. “You might not be from here, but you protected them all the same. Which is why I’ve gotta ask… when will I see you again?”

When would Thor grace this planet again? He had Jane, you remembered- who you were now making a mental note to reach out to. So he couldn’t stay away for too long, right? “Soon, I imagine.”

“Tony’s got a birthday party coming up. How should I send you your invite?” Grinning lightly at him. In the back of your head you registered it might not have been the right time to throw a fancy party anymore, considering what had happened…

“You just did.”

That was your cue that perhaps you were holding him up a little longer than necessary. So you tried your luck at one last hug, finding it still held as he squeezed you back. But then you stepped away, back to where you belonged at Tony’s side. He put his arm around your shoulder as the two of you watched Thor activate the cube, now in some sturdy device. An all too familiar blue light poured down on the two of them. And then just like that, it left, taking them with it.

The Asgardians were gone.

While Tony called for one of his fancy cars, you took a few more moments to bid your friends goodbye. They were much easier to reach, so the so-longs didn’t have to be quite as big. Clint and Natasha were off on their own ways, and you wondered briefly, “Does this mean I’ve graduated from training?”

She only smiled. “Not a chance. Can’t let you get rusty. But… all things considered, let’s keep the pause button on.” Meaning, simply, there was a lot of shit that needed to be done now. And no time for you to disappear to the gym.

Once on their way you turned to Steve, and really could only think of one thing to say first. “...I’m sorry for punching you.” It was more like a side-swipe, but in the heat of the moment it hadn’t really mattered how you’d hit him. Just that you had so that he would let go of you.

He shrugged, all smiles. “Not necessary. But accepted. You did what you had to.” There was an underlying thrum of pride here and you weren’t exactly sure why.

And you couldn’t exactly ask him about it, either. It would just have to go ignored. “What do you plan to do now?”

At this he seemed less sure, head turning down. “I don’t know. I was thinking… maybe I should visit Peggy after all.”

That was a tough decision to come to, you knew, and one harder still to face. To put into action. You reached out, just taking his hand for a quick moment. “You want me to come with you?” It was probably better left as a private moment, but if he needed you, you’d be there.

“Nah. Thanks, though.” A quick shake of his head. “Looks like you’ve got your work cut out for you. President’s got you on speed-dial, huh?”

Your head fell back in defeat with a sigh. “Yeah, seems that way.” Not something you wanted to deal with right now, but the window to do so was closing. The longer you left it, the more messy it would inevitably become and harder to untangle. But this did have you realizing something. “When’d you learn about speed-dial?” Grinning lightly, a little elbow to his side.

He grinned back. “I’m a quick study. Don’t treat me like they do. You know better.” It hadn’t really been too hard to see that everyone sort of thought Steve was a dinosaur lumbering around in this time. Stupid and slow on the draw. But that couldn’t have been further from the truth.

“I do.” Reaching up you gave him a quick hug. Just seemed like the day for it, apparently. Once you let him go, “I’m sure you heard me say it- and I’m actually not sure we still will, but just in case we do the birthday party thing-”

“I’ll be there. Just tell me when and where.” Firm and understanding. Still at your side. His cover as a Stark employee was definitely blown now- yours too, for that matter, although not in the same way- but he was still always ready to help you however you needed it.

A reassuring thought. “Thanks. You want me to get you on a flight to DC?”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll find my way.”

The two of you left each other with a nod, and just like that, he was off, too. It left you turning to Tony and Bruce who were busy chatting. Tony’s car had come, some fancy sports thing as usual. Even more surprising, Bruce had a suitcase in tow. That only meant one thing. As you came up aside them you beamed at him. “Accepted our offer? The Tower’s a little messed up but I’m sure it’s better than any hotel around here still.” You hoped it was facade damage more than anything. Although you knew the penthouse had seen its fair share.

He gave one of those shy shrugs with an even shyer smile. “You guys drive a hard bargain. Also I’m kinda curious to see if these labs are all you’re saying they are.”

Tony gave him a pat on the shoulder. “Oh they’ll drive you wild.” Grinning briefly. “Relatively speaking.”

--------------------

Back at the Tower there was still a flurry of activity happening all around. Not to mention the press parked on every available inch outside. First order of business, in that case, you grabbed a guy walking by, “Call the police. If they’re not busy. I’m sure they are. But when they’re not, can you tell them to escort the press off my property, please. Thank you.”

No statements today. Absolutely not. You needed a little more time to gather your thoughts and think about exactly what you wanted to say. In the private elevator, the doors opened on the fifth R&D floor, and Bruce stepped out. Although he paused to turn back when Tony didn’t come with. “Should I just… make myself at home?”

“Anything you want, buddy. Just give me twenty minutes.” Tony reached forward to press the close door button and then gave a little wave.

Just a tiny bit unsure, Bruce turned away. “Take your time…”

While you wanted to tell Tony to go off and have some nice relaxing, fun science adventures with his new best friend, the other part of you that was reaching max capacity for staying stable was grateful that you were first in his mind. And yet even then you found yourself saying, “You can go with him. It’s just gonna be phone calls all day.”

“He’s fine. We’ll deal with this first.”

Easing into his side, you wilted slightly. “Thank you…” It came out in a mumbling whine and a wave of emotion overtook you. You had to bite it back immediately. Now was absolutely not the time to start crying.

The first order of business came as soon as you stepped off the elevator into the penthouse, as your phone started ringing. Pepper calling. You answered it as you walked away, purposefully ignoring the debris and mess everywhere. “Hey, Pep- I spoke with Ellis, don’t worry- he’s next on my docket. I’m sorry he’s bothering you- about the party-”

“Party? You think we should care about the party ? I kind of need you to focus a little more on telling me what the hell happened. What’s going on? With Tony- and you now- you’re some sort of superhero? And the aliens thing? And who were those people you were with? And the big green thing-”

Going beyond into the master bedroom, you sat in a light crumple on the edge of the bed. Tony had been left behind, you weren’t sure what he was doing in the main room of the suite, but you had a good idea that he may have actually literally started cleaning up. “Okay. Okay… let me just think about… how to say this-”

“We’re past delicacy. That would have been two days ago. Or any time before then. You just need to talk to me.” She was a little more than pissed. Which was fair.

So, you just had to start talking. Easy, right? “Those people I was with are part of a team called The Avengers. We were put together by a secret government organization called SHIELD. I was first contacted by then when Tony got back from Afghanistan after the kidnapping. The point of the team is to try and deal with threats that the military can’t handle- speaking of which- where the hell is Rhodey?” The thought just occurred.

“I don’t know. That’s not important right now. Continue.”

You sighed. “Okay. Well- so- There’s Tony, obviously, and me- he built a suit for me. It wasn’t originally for this but it sort of became about it. You know. When aliens started trying to kill everyone. Then there’s Steve Rogers- Captain America-”

“That’s the- that’s Steve, your New York security lead. You’ve been hiding him this whole- ...did you just say Captain America??”

“I did. Yes. Captain America. From like. The forties. Yeah. That’s him. His jet was found in some ice in the arctic and SHIELD thawed him out. I was part of the team who met up with him and… well obviously that became a whole thing so I had to try and cover it up.”

“Seems like you’ve been covering a lot up these days.”

“Okay. Ouch, but fair.” Extremely. This really would have been a much easier conversation to have in pieces, but that was your fault. You knew this would come eventually. You should have just tried to find a way to be honest with her. “Then there’s Natasha and Clint, they actually worked for SHIELD long before I was part of this whole thing. And Thor, the guy with the hammer. He’s from a different planet. Asgard. And the big green thing is actually a very nice man named Bruce Banner who we’re hosting right now.”

“...he’s up there with you?”

“Look. He’s not always a big green thing. Most of the time he’s a normal guy. And he’s a scientist.”

“Like a- like a mad scientist?”

You knew what she was trying to get at. “No. He’s very nice, like I said. ...but yes, him turning into a big green guy did have to do with an experiment gone awry. But some of that wasn’t his fault.” In his file you’d read, in fact, that it had been Ross’ fault. Which made all the more sense why Tony was keen on him. Mutual enemies, he’d said. That was fine with you. You agreed with the notion. She went silent for a long moment, then you heard her sigh. “Okay. Next.”

Next what? The aliens? “Okay… uh. So we put the team together because Thor’s brother Loki decided to go crazy and try and enslave everyone on earth with an alien army. So we stopped them. The end.”

“I feel like you skipped some parts.”

“Yeah, Pep. I did. Because I’ve basically slept a total of twenty minutes in two days and spent the last four hours fighting fucking aliens. Is that good enough?” It wasn’t like you wanted to fight with her, and she certainly didn’t deserve it, but after everything you were worn a little bit thin. There were bigger things to deal with right now than giving a detailed explanation of your absolutely insane life.

She made a dismayed, possibly annoyed, noise from her end of the phone and you worried she may have had enough. Wouldn’t a normal person walk away from this? But, to your surprise, “...so. The party. We’re not doing it anymore?”

You fell back on the bed. A dangerous thing to do considering how nice it felt to be lying down. “I don’t think it’s a good idea to throw a big fancy party when half of New York was just destroyed. Might send the wrong message. - no , wait!”

“Waiting.”

“That’s perfect.” One hand shooting up in mock victory. “We’ll throw a charity ball at the Tower. Funds go to the survivors and the city. Then we’ll throw a sort of block-party uh… thing. Sponsored by Stark Industries. People can come, have a good time, unwind, pick up care packages, eat… come together…”

“Okay. Sounds good. I’ll get to work on that. Just one thing.”

“What?” You imagined there were many things. But if she was calling out one, it was probably the most important.

“The Tower is kind of wrecked, isn’t it?”

“It’s not so bad. We’ll get it cleaned up in time.” That was a promise you were sure you could deliver on. You hoped, at least.

“Mn. Well. Maybe get to work on the Stark part. Your letters kind of fell off.”

Oh that was right, wasn’t it? “All of them?” That really sucked. You’d thought at least a few had made it…

“Just the A left. Channels are playing footage of the letters falling on a loop.”

Of course . “Yeah. Great. Thanks Pep. I’ll finish up with Ellis so he stops bothering you.”

“Very appreciated.” After that she hung up.

Only the A left, huh? Maybe it was time to rebrand. Even though you’d just finished this fucking thing. Even though you hadn’t even gotten a chance to do a presser about your beautiful new baby that had been Stark Tower. Life was so unfair. You’d worked so hard. But now an image shift was necessary. More personal quarters would have to be built. Because this tower was about to become a beacon of this city, and the world.

This was where the Avengers fought. This was where the Avengers won. And this is where you could find them. Avengers Tower. Yeah. It had to be done.

The bed called to you. It would be so nice to just drift off. For too long a time. Let the world go on without you for a little while longer… but your phone started ringing again, and reminded you you were no longer allowed to sit silently. No longer allowed to be still. Not in the aftermath of all this.

Seeing it was the President himself, you transferred the call to the desk in the lounge outside, forcing yourself to get up off the bed. The room was much darker than it should have been, being midday, lit by the lamps instead. Tony had drawn down some sort of security barriers over the broken windows to keep the air from flowing in. It didn’t really surprise you too much that he had a protocol like that ready, always prepared for the worst. Even if before you two really had had no idea what the worst could be.

Sitting at the desk you pulled up a conference window, forcing Ellis off the verbal phone and onto a video chat. It seemed to work out fine for him, because he immediately started pacing. “You got anything for me yet?”

“What do you want from me, sir?” As you asked, Tony came over, finished sweeping for the moment, sitting on the corner of the desk.

Spying him, Ellis perked up. “OH! Stark! There you are! What are we going to do about this?”

Tony crossed his arms. “With all due respect, sir, you’re the President. Shouldn’t you be telling us that? Who usually cleans up these messes for you?”

At the same time, you and Ellis sounded off an answer that only made you that more exhausted. “SHIELD.” You continued. “Of course it’s SHIELD. Well- imagine for a minute that our government isn’t made out of rubber bands and string. If SHIELD wasn’t here, what would your next step be?”

“I don’t know… what did you say- about… what happened out there? Aliens? ...I mean we’ve got Area 51, but-”

Tony snapped. “Fine. I’ll overnight you ownership transfer paperwork.” At this you shot him only the most exhausted look you could imagine. “...what? Stark Industries will buy Area 51. What’s wrong with that?”

“For containment- for storage? Sure. Fine. But that’s not gonna help with cleanup.” Sure you could have a team haul dead alien bodies and space whales off to the desert, but who was going to do that? Safely and securely? Tony had a point though… this was a good start. 51 would at least give you security measures to make sure nobody got their hands on those bodies, or those weapons. There was no telling what kind of havoc could be wrought if someone tried to reverse engineer that stuff.

Like SHIELD. Which was what had started this whole fucking mess in the first place. Which was exactly why you had to get ahead of this before them.

“We have them um… Department of Damage Control, but it’s underwater. There might be about um… fifty people on payroll, if that.”

“Damage Control?” You’d never heard of such a thing in your life. But after a brief glance at Tony you looked back at Ellis on the screen. “Fine. Stark Industries will buy the Department of Damage Control. I need staff to start vetting agents for transition. And I want the next top picks in my office at some point so I can interview them.” If you sensed even an iota off about anyone, they were out on their ass. This was all delicate stuff, and it was a shame your powers weren’t replication. Having ten of you would be nice. But there was only the one. So you’d have to delegate where you could.

Ellis seemed a little unsure. “And this is… all on the record…?” His image, he cared about, more than doing the right thing. Of course.

“We’ll do a press briefing together. I’ll talk about assuming Damage Control. Area 51 is off the public books.” You didn’t need that amount of nonsense on your back.

“Oh. Good. Good… so when can you get here by?”

“You’re coming here, sir. New York was just attacked. No offense, but if you’re worried about what people think about you, you might want to pretend enough to come talk to them where they got hit. Not behind your desk. I’ll expect you tomorrow afternoon. I’m going to post a date. Don’t be late.”

Tony tapped your shoulder. “You seem like you’ve got this.”

Forcing a smile that was not too tired, you gave him a little pat back on his side. “I’m fine. Go. Have a good time with Bruce. It’s all logistics and speech writing from here.”

Leaning in he pressed a kiss to your temple. “Write me something good.”

“I always do.”

You waited, watching him amble away from the desk and to the elevator. Just as the doors closed he gave you a salute. Instead of returning it, you brought your hands up into the shape of a heart, and watched him melt. Just a little. Feeling relief and warmth radiate from him before the elevator went on its way down.

With him gone, you interrupted Ellis’ mumbling. With a hard stare and an even harder tone, “Did you order that nuke on Manhattan?”

“A nuke?! No- I have no idea what you’re talking about! What nuke?!”

“Someone authorized a nuclear missile on the city- I assume because they thought we couldn’t contain the situation. Someone authorized a total loss of life to try and clean up. Did you do it?”

“No! God- no! I would never! I’ve been in my office calling you two all day! I swear!”

You glared at your screen. “If I find out you’re lying to me, you’ll regret it.”

“I’m not! I’m not!! I wouldn’t do that- do you know how much you have to go through to authorize a god damn nuke on a city?? On your own city?? I wouldn’t have even had the time to cut all that red tape!” He seemed desperate for you to believe him.

It didn’t mean you should. And you’d consider the possibility that it had been him. But… Ellis wasn’t the sort of man that would do that, for exactly the reasons he’d laid out. He’d been looking for help. For answers. He just wasn’t the type to fire blindly. But someone had. And if it hadn’t been the President, you knew the next person to ask.

“Fine. We’ll talk later. Be here by tomorrow.” Before he could start either protesting or asking more questions you hung up on him. Moving on to the next and last person you wanted to talk about this today. You were almost a little surprised he picked up.

“You are not to talk to the press- or anyone for that matter- until we get you in a debrief. I can’t believe you let Thor off planet-”

Silencing him with coldness, “Who ordered the nuke, Fury?”

A huff of indignant yet amuse air came from him. “How much time you got? How secure is your channel?” It was at least a little bit shocking that he was even entertaining telling you. Maybe after you’d called him out on all his lies- and how much trouble they’d caused- maybe he was finally learning.

You doubted it. But maybe.

“JARVIS-”

“You are fully encrypted, Ms. INY. This conversation does not leave this room.”

“Thank you.” Even though it wasn’t like he lived in the ceiling, that’s where you directed your smile, until it died and you looked back at your screen. “Tell me.”

He stared at you. For too long a time. A little bit unnerving, but you held and waited. Finally, “They’re called the World Security Council. Made up of what they’d like to think are Earth’s smartest politicians.”

You couldn’t help the screw in your expression. “Excuse me? Who are they?”

“I don’t know.”

“Don’t fucking bullshit me-”

“I don’t know . That’s the whole point. You think I’m allowed to know the identities of the people who authorized a nuclear launch on New York City?” He was making a fair point. Of course these people would operate in shadow, with that kind of power. With what they could do with it, and the consequences that would come with it, should they make the wrong decision. “They oversee SHIELD. I don’t get to call the shots with them.”

Something in your head finally clicked. “...they were the ones that tasked us with securing Abomination?” You’d wondered, when Coulson said someone had ordered SHIELD to do that. “-so your work-around when they tell you to do something you don’t like is to just-”

“Ignore them or botch it. Yeah. Usually. This time it didn’t go my way.”

Meaning there was always a next time where it would just as equally be out of his control. And if Tony hadn’t done what he’d done… “How do I find out who they are?”

“You let me know when you do.” It was hard to tell if he was being purposefully unhelpful. For all you’d been through with him, you imagined that may be the case. And there was probably a lot more he wasn’t saying.

“They considered New York to be a lost cause- scratch that- New York City and anything about fifty miles out from it. You understand that? Because of what they did- if Tony hadn’t taken that missile-”

“Why do you think I called him?” He stopped your ranting. A good thing. You might not have been able to keep from shouting. Maybe even crying a little. It was all mounting. “They pretty much run on needs of the many. And they’re not always right.”

“Then why are they in charge?” He scoffed, grinning, which only angered you the more. “They made the wrong call, Nick. And a lot of people almost paid for it. We’re still paying for it.” It wasn’t his business that you and Tony were suffering, but the cleanup was going to have to be massive. And it fell on you. Your team. Not them.

His head tilted up. “Looks like you’re pretty settled in over there.”

You knew what he was getting at. “I didn’t ask for this.”

Eye closing, he scoffed again, a little shrug. “Nobody did.” His last poignant words before cutting the communication.

For a long moment you sat there. Surrounded by silence. Breath in. Then out. While Tony had tried to sweep, the place was still a wreck. A piece of drywall on the corner of your desk upset you the most, enough for you to reach your arm over to swipe it away. In doing so you knocked over a very expensive decorative desk piece, sending it to the floor in an ear shattering clatter.

You’d deserved that. You’d deserved that.

Trying to fix one mess, made another.

It happened so fast, your arms folding on the desk, you laying your head in them, and then the crying started. Hard, until it became a chore to breathe. The worst part was, it didn’t feel like it was helping. It just felt terrible.

JARVIS spoke- your name , not Lady, not Ms. INY, but your actual name. The strangeness of it got your sobs to quiet down for just a few seconds, sniffling as you tried to listen to him. “It appears that you are in distress. Shall I call Tony?” Tony. Not Mr. Stark.

What was happening?

“No… no don’t… please leave him alone.. I’m okay…” Each word soft and a struggle in the middle of your weeping. If Tony was having a good time with Bruce, you didn’t want to interrupt that. He deserved some peace, more than anyone. Certainly more than you.

“This is not what I would call okay, ma’am.”

His gentle sass at least encouraged a watery smile. “You’re right.”

“I can put together a list of mental health professionals.” He was being incredibly kind. Although just a touch robotic. But how could he help that? It’s what he was. You were grateful for it nonetheless.

“Thank you, but… I don’t think anyone can help me.” Not with everything you’d been through. Not with what you were dealing with.

“You are not beyond help.” Those words sat in your chest. Maybe for too long a time. You wanted to ask him why he thought that. Or why he was trying to help you. He wasn’t programmed to deal with crying. Was he? But before you could get to asking he spoke up again. “Lieutenant Colonel Rhodes is approaching.” Strange. You almost expected- maybe even wanted him to say Rhodey.

Pushing yourself up, you wiped at your eyes. What a terrible time to be caught. There wasn’t enough that you could do to hide the signs of your struggle as the elevator doors opened and he stepped out. Embarrassed, you still tried your best, going to him in a rush, hugging him tight, hiding your face. “Where in the absolute hell have you been?!”

An extremely valid question, you felt.

“Hey- whoa- sorry. I kinda got sidetracked on a mission in the middle east. I was dark. I had no idea- uh… about the uh… aliens?”

He was angling you away, which was a shame, you weren’t finished trying to keep your tears at bay. “Yeah- aliens.” Wiping them away again with your fingers, putting on a valiant pretend smile. “We really could have used you.” War Machine would have been a great asset to have on the field.

“I don’t know. Seems like you guys did alright.” He set you back, hands on your shoulders. Taking in the sight of your shameful crying. “...for the most part. You wanna talk about it?”

Shaking your head, you pressed at your eyes. Stop crying, damn it! “What’s there to talk about? Aliens came and we fought them and we won.”

“War is war.” He said this with such sturdiness, it broke you again. Of course he’d understand.

“Yeah… yeah …” Hands coming up to cover your eyes again as it all came crashing down.

His arm came around your shoulder. “Come on. Let’s sit. You got food here? Coffee? I’ll make you some coffee. Tell me about it.”

So you showed him to the kitchen. He put a pot of coffee on. And you tried to tell him everything. How you and Tony had been brought in by SHIELD. How you and Tony had rifled through their things. Who Loki was and how you’d fought him. And the aliens, and how you’d fought them too. Crying through most of it. But with him sitting and listening, it wasn’t so bad.

It was just…

It didn’t make you feel better. Just empty. Even though you’d gotten it all out, it just left a hollowness. Yet a heaviness that made it that much easier to slip until you fell. You were sure you’d fallen asleep at the table when he’d turned his back to put more coffee on, but in between one daze and the next you were sure you were in bed. Stirring a little when Tony came to lie down next to you, and then falling deep when his arms came around you, pulling you close. Holding you. Tight.

He was murmuring something...

--------------------

Anger was coming to a rumbling storm inside Rhodey’s heart. He’d never expected half the things she’d been talking about, but that wasn’t really the point of it all. It was her suffering, and how she was treating it. How she was framing it all. And there was only one person who could even begin to try and fix it. Considering how centered that focal point was.

Going down to the lab, he saw Tony, goggles on, with the guy she’d labeled as Bruce. Heavy hand on Tony’s shoulder he turned him around, forcibly walking him out into the hallway. “You gotta start cleaning up." She needs you. Rhodey was sure he said it more than once- the way Tony was staring at him was sort of off-putting. Like he was trying to register who they were even talking about.

Tony balked, when he finally answered. "What do you mean? I was just there- she seemed fine-"

“She just spent two hours telling me a story about how you saved New York City.”

“Fair point. I did.��

"Tones.” Recapturing his attention and trying to direct him away from getting self-inflated. “I’ve been through a lot- I’ve seen soldiers go through a lot. Not like what she’s just been through. What you've been through. But I’ve never seen anyone view it through a window that’s not theirs.”

Tony’s brow arched. “Mind dropping the paraphrasing and being straight with me? It’s been a long day.”

“Here’s straight. She’s suffering up there but all she can think about is you. And you’re down here playing with eighth grade lab kits.”

It did him no good when Tony wilted. Even less when he tried to pick back up. “Technically speaking, we’re trying to stabilize a gamma-”

“Whatever. Can you do it later?”

Tony looked back at Bruce who tried to hide that he’d been watching them. “Yeah. I- ...yeah.”

“Good. Look… you probably need someone to talk to, too. I can recommend some people-”

“I’m fine. Hey- where have you been, anyway? I put in a dozen calls to get you over here. And you just show up now? ” Tony crossed his arms.

Rhodey waved a hand in his face. “Don’t start. She already caught me with that.”

At this Tony’s expression moved into a warm smile. “Yeah. Of course she did.” Big breath in and then out. “Yeah. Alright. Good chat. Don’t go far, okay? Stay local.”

“Sure thing.” A firm handshake turned into a hug that Tony was just a little reluctant to get out of.

After excusing himself from Bruce, who understood wholeheartedly, he went upstairs. Past the lounge and into the dark bedroom, he was relieved a little to see her curled on her side asleep. It wasn’t the best time to just lie down and take a nap, but drawn to her as always, he slipped out of his shoes and got in beside her. Wasting no time in wrapping his arms around her and holding her to him.

One hand at the side of her hair, lips at her temple, “I’m alright, you know…?” Lying. Lying because he couldn’t bear to think she was holding it all in on his behalf. He needed to be stronger. Even if every time he closed his eyes he saw-

“I love you.” She mumbled back. Still very much asleep.

“We’re okay. Aren’t we? We’re okay…” Very soon holding turned to clinging to her.

“We’re okay…” She murmured in her sleep.

“We’re okay.” Just saying it a few more times. Trying to make it true. But at least he knew one honest thing, “I love you. I love you…”

I love you.

#Tony Stark #Tony Stark x Reader #INY Chapter Fifty Eight

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realityhelixcreates · 5 years

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Lasabrjotr Chapter 17: Man as Enemy to Man

Chapters: 17/? Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: Teen And Up Warnings: Death, dirty language, violence Relationships: Loki x Reader (But not yet) Characters: Loki (Marvel), Reader, Brunnhilde, Thor, Heimdall Additional Tags: Post-Endgame: Best Possible Ending (Canon-Divergent), Radicalization is a Bitch, Questions Questions, I Don’t Know How to Ride a Horse, But I’ve Seen it on TeeVee, Hell Day Summary: Reader has a very busy day.

Loki sent the messenger ahead to tell the stablehands to get his horse ready, spending just a handful of moments on finding you something warm to throw around your shoulders.

“Would that I could leave you behind, _____, but I cannot this time.” He led you swiftly through the Capital Building, out into the stable yard. People deftly slipped out of his way, his presence seeming to project ahead of him like a wedge.

“We’ve seen that we mustn’t be separated by such a distance, as the deleterious effects set in on you very swiftly. And more; you may be able to identify this person for us. I understand that it might be frightening to face someone who has tried to kill you, but-“

“We don’t really know that for sure though.” You pointed out. “They could have been aiming at you. This knife can hurt you, can’t it?” You patted the blade at your waist. “Normal weapons can’t, can they? But this is something special?”

“An astute observation. I’ll explain more about the knife later. Unfortunately, it has become much more likely that you were the intended target after all.” He hesitated. “_____, someone has been killed. Another human. You need to be prepared for…unpleasantness.”

You shuddered. Living with one murderer, and about to go face another. Though Loki might not have been altogether in control of the bloodying of his own hands, you had no idea if anything had been done for the families of his previous victims. Had anything been set right? Was he even a bit remorseful?

That was, of course, if he wasn’t lying about everything.

“I…can probably handle it.” You had seen dead bodies before. But those had all come back to life in the end; or rather, they had never died in the first place. This poor dead person was going to remain that way.

“There’s Einherjar there, right?”

“Correct. You will be safe.” Loki would be there too. If he wanted to keep you alive for his purposes-nefarious or not-he would have to protect you.

Loki’s beautiful horse, Leynarodd, was brought out, but no horse was brought for you. You’d heard the horse that had been stolen was returned now, and you were glad to hear it, but she wasn’t here. Instead, Loki helped you up onto the huge animal, then climbed up and settled down behind you.

The severity of the situation finally hit you, only as you were being borne inexorably towards it. An actual murderer awaited you, one whose victim was there, on site, where you were now heading. They had tried to kill you: earnestly tried to end your life. If the knife had been made for throwing, if you hadn’t been wearing thick layers, they might have succeeded.

And now you were travelling right to this person, someone who wanted you dead for reasons you didn’t even know.

Your heard raced faster with every hill and valley that brought you closer, but closing your eyes only forced you to concentrate on the power of the horse beneath you, of how closely tucked up against Loki you were. Of the perfect cage of his arms holding the reins to either side of your shoulders, thighs pressed the length yours, torso molded to your back. With your eyes closed, you couldn’t help but focus on how a person has to move their hips in order to effectively ride a galloping horse.

You were breathless and nervy by the time you arrived, so clearly anxious that when Loki helped you down off Leynarodd’s back, he held you between himself and the horse for a few moments, rubbing your shoulders in what he must have thought was a calming manner.

The area was a mess; the ground disturbed by scuffle, and strewn with garbage. Close to the trees, a bloodied Asgardian soldier was draped over a sheet-covered body, wailing. The sergeant in charge of the investigation approached, grim-faced.

“Oh no.” Loki breathed. “Is it-?”

“I’m afraid so.” The sergeant confirmed, speaking lightly accented English, for your sake. “I knew this would end in tragedy, but I didn’t think it would be like this. I should have known something was suspicious when she volunteered to watch this area so eagerly. If I’d known, I’d have sent someone else, and that poor man might still be alive. He was a citizen of this land. I don’t know if we should send word to the authorities yet.”

“Do you have the killer?” Loki asked.

“Oh yes.” She said. “The miscreant is over here.”

She led you several dozen yards away, over a low hill, out of sight of the grieving soldier. You found yourself curling your fingers around Loki’s and, noticing your apprehension, he did not pull away.

Restrained and surrounded, a scruffy, roughed-up man sat on the ground, scowling.

“You.” Loki said sharply. “You have murdered a citizen of this nation. What have you to say for yourself?”

The man ignored him, fixing his hateful stare on you.

“You’re still alive.” He growled, disappointed. He had an American accent.

Loki stepped forward to loom over the man.

“I am Loki, Prince of Asgard, and you will answer to me.” There was anger in his voice, the kind that had made you cringe in the camp. Now, as then, it was on your behalf, but it still made you want to shrink back. “Why have you killed this man? Why have you tried to kill this woman?”

The man flinched from the power of his voice.

“They’re traitors to their people!” He exclaimed. “Abetting you invaders, betraying their own for your attention! For you! A usurper! A mass-murderer! We aren’t going to sit back and let you invaders steal our women! And we won’t abide traitors to humanity!”

“A terrorist.” Loki sighed, voice full of disgust. “Cease. That’s more than enough.”

“Is it good when he fucks you?” The man snarled at you. “Good enough to commit treason against your whole planet? You’re the devil’s whore, and we won’t stop until you are in the ground, you-“

Loki’s boot smashed into the man’s already bruised face, sending him rolling over himself in the trampled flowers.

“Oh, I would like to kill you.” Loki hissed, as two guards hauled the man back into a kneeling position. “But I won’t make a martyr out of slime. All your hatred for us, and you manage only to harm other humans? Pathetic. You have murdered an Icelandic citizen, and you will be turned over to Icelandic justice. You will rot in a human jail and be forgotten. I don’t even care to know your name.”

With that, the prince turned his back and carefully pulled you away, sending the sergeant on a journey to the nearest settlement, to contact the authorities.

“Don’t you listen to a word he said, he is clearly a madman who knows nothing of the situation.” Loki helped you back up onto his horse.

“Did you know him?” He asked on the way back. You were riding at a much more leisurely pace, now that you were no longer in a hurry, allowing you to take in the magnificence of the wild Icelandic summer, and also allowing your heart rate to remain only a little elevated, instead of completely off the charts.

“I’ve never met him, but I think I’ve seen him before.” You said. “In the camp, I think? He was playing an instrument by a fire. I think that was him. Was he there the whole time? Do you think he followed me? He was talking like there were more people like him, do you think there are more coming? Or already here?” Your voice raised, becoming shrill with fear. “Will they just keep killing people until they get me?”

“Shh-shh…” Loki switched both reins to one hand, freeing one arm to wrap around you. A quiet whine escaped you through gritted teeth, finding little comfort in being held tighter to his body. “No one will ‘get’ you. Now that we are aware of this danger, we will all be ready. I…I did not sense any lies from him. Whether there really are others or not, he truly believes that there are. But even if there are more, there is at least one that is now out of the picture. I will see that he does not become glorified, that he is treated as any other criminal: reviled or forgotten.”

He held you tightly all the way back, trying to quell your flourishing paranoia, but you couldn’t help but stare at every person who passed you, searching for signs of hidden hostility. There were Asgardians who didn’t like humans. They could kill you just as easily, maybe moreso than another human. After all, other humans weren’t allowed in New Asgard. You were surrounded by Asgardians all the time.

You didn’t feel safe again until dinnertime, and that was only because you were surrounded by actual gods, that you knew were at least a little fond of you.

All of them were excited about the laukas that Loki had mentioned, which turned out to be something a little like leeks. They were very tasty, but not as exotic as you thought they would be. They probably meant more to the Aesir around you, like a taste of lost childhood. It was a miracle that they grew here at all.

Loki had briefly mentioned what had happened earlier, leaving out certain details, like the murderer’s tirade against you.

“How do you fare?” Heimdall asked you quietly. You didn’t think you could lie to him. You might be able to lie to Loki, and though he would know, he might not call you out on it, but Heimdall probably would. Besides, his concern seemed so genuine, it felt wrong not to be honest.

“Not very well. I’m frightened.”

“This is a harrowing experience, and I regret you’ve had to go through it.” Thor said.

“I hadn’t even thought about what a bunch of strangers might make of this. I never expected to be hated over this. I thought everyone would be mad at his highness maybe, but not me. None of them know what’s really going on.” It was all so completely unfair. You hadn’t asked for any of this. You couldn’t even enjoy your time here, as an impromptu vacation, like Loki had suggested. You felt like a prisoner.

“Everybody feels entitled to an opinion.” Brunnhilde said. “Seems like the less they know, the more details they have to make up, to have opinions about.”

“You can see anything, right?” You asked Heimdall.

“In theory.”

“Could you see if anyone has tried to cause trouble for my dad because of this?”

Heimdall fixed his amber gaze on some faraway point.

“Your father is in a large vehicle. He is singing along to music, and appears unharmed. There is a small, gray flerkin with him.”

“What?” Brunnhilde gasped. “Here? On Earth?”

“What’s a flerkin?” You demanded, startled by the reaction.

“We must do something!” Loki exclaimed.

“Everyone, settle down!” Thor commanded. “There are no flerkins on Earth right now. There are however, small creatures kept as pets that superficially resemble flerkins. Possibly a form of mimicry for defensive purposes. It’s very effective; they look exactly the same, but here, they are known as ‘cats’. _____, does your father own a cat?”

“Momo!” You exclaimed. “Okay, so he’s on a job right now. Good, good. I hope the other truckers aren’t on his case. Thank you so much for doing that for me.”

Heimdall simply inclined his head.

“Um, is it okay to ask you how it works? Like, is it rude to discuss god power stuff?”

“Well…” Thor began. “It’s not taboo or anything, but there are rude questions and polite questions, just like anything else.”

“I just wonder, when you look at those far away things, is it like you are actually seeing them in front of you? Or is it more of an image in your mind’s eye?”

Heimdall’s expression changed noticeably for the first time since you had met him, revealing pleased surprise.

“It has been a long time indeed since anyone asked me about that. In fact, if I remember correctly, the last person to ask me almost exactly that same question was, I believe, attempting to find a way to hide from my sight.”

Loki hastily shoved another lauka into his mouth.

“My sight has varied applications. I can see through others eyes, and share my vision with others. In a way, all eyes are my eyes. I can see just a little into the past, and a little into the future. However, when I look into far realms, and not through someone else, it is far more within my mind, as you would put it, and I remain aware of my immediate surroundings.”

“Wow. You know, I don’t think I would really want to be able to do that. You’ve probably seen all kinds of things you rather wouldn’t have.”

Heimdall smiled, flashing bright teeth. “You would not be wrong.”

“And you control storms?” You asked Thor.

“Kind of, yes. I can call lightening as I will it, and thunder naturally comes with it. I do have some control over weather, locally, whether it rains or not, and where, and for how long. Plants seem to grow more vigorously wherever I spend much time.”

“Children too.” Heimdall pointed out.

“That’s a good thing though.” Brunnhilde added. “Our numbers are few. But Asgard has never had a fertility god as king before, only war gods.”

Thor squirmed, both Loki and Brunnhilde giving him teasing looks.

“But brother, aren’t you proud to be such a great aid to your people?”

Thor squirmed more. “Cut it out. It just feels…coercive. That’s all.”

“It is simply Nature, amplified.” Heimdall said. “There is nothing shameful in passively assisting something that was going to happen anyway.”

You’d never thought of it that way before; of the responsibilities that might come with godhood. It was something one was born with, and surely some Aesir were uninterested in being Aesir, but if they all had powers that passively effected their surroundings, there might be no escaping it.

“Besides,” Thor grumbled. “Father was a wisdom god.”

“Odin was a war god up until he decided to rebrand.” Brunnhilde pointed out. “And he was only able to take up the mantle of a wisdom god because of all the secrets he kept. Easy to seem wise when you’ve hoarded away all the vital information. And we all saw how badly that went.”

Loki covered your ears.

“Not in front of the mortal.” He said, even though you could clearly still hear.

The Valkyrie abated. “Dark as it may seem, we have an incredible opportunity right now. The both of you now know exactly what kind of things not to do. Odin kept too many secrets; Thor may be meant to air them out. Maybe that’s why he sweats ozone.”

The kings face turned bright red.

“You noticed that too?” You asked, prying Loki’s hands off your ears. “I’m not the only one?”

“He’s a breath of fresh air, in his own way.” She teased.

“And you have supreme battle goddess powers?” You asked Brunnhilde.

“Ooh, I like that.” Brunnhilde preened. “Also, I can see the dead.”

“What?”

“Well, the recently dead, anyway, and only those slain in battle. Furthermore, I can see how they died, and how they comported themselves in every battle they ever took part in. One of the Valkyries duties was to choose which fallen Einherjar got the honor of being interred in the Black Hall. That’s not really a thing anymore, so that ability is pretty useless now.”

“Hmm.” Loki mused. “I wonder if that might be helpful when the investigators of this land come around to ask us about this recent unpleasantness.”

“Maybe.” Brunnhilde glanced over his shoulder. “He did follow you home, after all.”

Your insides went cold.

“W-what?” You stammered, really hoping she wasn’t implying what you thought she was.

“He fought hard, for someone who was not a warrior. A lucky strike got him in the end, but he made a very spirited showing. Not quite Valhalla material, but nothing dishonorable either. “

You clung to Loki in utter horror. The living dead were real, and one had followed you home. You were certain that if you looked behind you right now, you would see nothing. Brunnhilde was probably the only one who could see it; maybe Heimdall could too. Not being able to see it, but knowing it was there was almost worse.

Loki let you cling, draping his cape around you like a shield. You buried your head in it. Scary movies and ghost stories were one thing, but none of it was supposed to be real!

“Could you send him on his way, perhaps?” He requested on your behalf. “It won’t do for him to stay overlong. He might get stuck as a vengeful spirit, and his lady would not want that for him.”

Brunnhilde nodded. “She is fine.” She said to the place beyond Loki’s shoulder. “There’s nothing for you to worry about. You can go in peace.” She tilted her head. “Really? Thanks for the info. Farewell.”

“Is he gone?” You whispered.

“Yes. But he did say that the killer mentioned that he had friends coming. We should probably get you trained up in self-defense.”

There was a round of agreement from everyone.

Your tasty lamb and laukas sat heavy in your stomach, and your distinguished company seemed to tower over you, so important and untouchable. How could you protect yourself? Maybe you could just ask Loki to lock you up in the little room, so you could sleep until this all blew over. Just stay in bed until everyone had forgotten about you, until you became nothing more than a legend.

You were already kind of an Asgardian cryptid, gathering stares wherever you went. That Beli fellow, wanting to use you as a teaching aid, the sewing ladies, dressing you up like a doll. Loki, parading you around as his personal prize. But who among them actually knew you? How could anyone know you, when you were starting to not even know yourself?

Learning how to use your new knife would be a good first step in taking yourself back. Whatever Loki’s plans for you, he had to make sure no one killed you beforehand. Whatever else he might do to you, he could at least be counted on to try to keep you safe.

*****

“Your lady is deeply troubled.” Heimdall told Loki, after you had been put to bed.

“I’m beginning to notice.” Loki said. “And she’s not my lady.”

“Please.” Brunnhilde scoffed. “You honestly think old Beli was gonna keep his mouth shut about your announcement? The whole court knows. All the Einherjar know. I give it three days before even the smallest child knows.”

“Then they can celebrate with us!” Loki said. “I know Father had no need of a seidkona after he married mother, but the tradition is still there, and I still have the right to choose my own. Even if I don’t exactly need sorcerous support, it’s still a good place for her, still within tradition. It should be acceptable.”

“Alarr and his posse are furious.” Brunnhilde informed him. “They are threatening not to appear for this Buridag celebration, and to keep their families at home. They are agitating to convince others from coming as well.”

“Of course they are.” Thor sighed.

“He’ll have a demon of a time trying to keep Andsvarr away.” Loki said. The boy was more than a little smitten with admiration. He would probably fight to get to the celebration, if he had to.

“What are her thoughts on the matter?” Heimdall asked.

“She’s fine with it!” Loki said. “I told her about it when we were discussing celebration plans with Beli. She came up with the most wonderful idea-“

“Are you sure she was fine with it?” Brunnhilde asked. “Or did you just tell her it was happening, and she didn’t think she was allowed to say no? She might not think she’s always allowed to say no to you, and that is a much bigger problem than you want to admit it is.”

“Now just a damn minute-“ Loki began.

“Does she even know what a seidkona is?” Thor wondered.

“She…might not, actually. I thought she did, but now that I think about it, it might not have actually been mentioned in detail…”

They all ganged up on him then, and as irritating as it was, they had good points. Did humans even have seidkona? How could she know how important this appointment was? How could she act in proper capacity for her title when she was still a novice?

“Look!” He said, raising his voice over the protests. “I’m going to address all of these issues. But not tonight. Buridag is still months away, and I will be training her up in magic and knifework for her own protection. She will not be unprepared.”

“But she’s got to understand what it means.” Brunnhilde said. “And Heimdall is right, something is troubling her, and it’s not just the assassination attempt. Although that didn’t help.”

“I’ll see to it.” Loki promised. “Starting tomorrow.”

#loki x reader #loki (marvel)#thor (marvel)#Heimdall (Marvel)#valkyrie (marvel)#brunnhilde (marvel)

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prevariicator-archive · 6 years

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The problem with saying Loki ruled Asgard longer, and was a better ruler of Asgard than Thor, is VAST.

First off, Thor didn't have a fucking chance. He ruled for only a few hours if even before Thanos came and slaughtered the Asgardians because of LOKI stealing the tesseract in Ragnarok. You can not compare their ruling based on time. Thor needed the time to be away from Asgard to learn to be a good man, and to know his limits and when not to be a spoiled brat chasing war for no reason, and to learn what was important about ruling people/learning more about what it meant to truly protect people and the things/places he loved. He has major character development through the series that makes him a good king because he recognizes that the title requires more than sitting on your ass eating grapes watching bad theater.

The way they rule... Originally if he had been king in the first movie, Thor would have had Asgard at war at every turn. It would have been chaos. But after everything he's been through, going from God/Prince/Future King to Mortal/Weak to Slave/Possession (for someone's violent amusement )the character development changes how he would have ruled. He thought only for the best of his people, got half of them to safety with Valkyrie, and fought -most likely with the intent of dying for his people- until he had nothing and was completely broken. Thor's actions in Infinity War are flat out suicidal and fueled by rage and depression. He's lost everything - and it all started with Loki allowing Jotuns into Asgard to prevent his intended rule. But at the same time, Loki helped him be a better fit for a king by doing so. But Thor didn't have a chance to prove himself a worthy and good king before Thanos came and fucked shit up because Loki couldn't keep his hands off of the Tesseract. But, that brings the question of if Thanos would have come either way. Loki owed him the debt from his failure after all. But in both scenarios- he came because of Loki. Loki has ruled twice. Let's talk about instance number one- to get the title of king he a)let enemies into Asgard b)caused 4 deaths and showed zero remorse for what he'd done c)Had Thor banished (you can argue if this was intentional or not based on the movie and one of the Thor guidebook which says he intentionally goaded Thor into going to Jotunheim to get him in trouble with Odin) d) Only got it because Odin went into Odinsleep (you guys joke but this dude was already in poor health-poor enough for his enemy to take notice of his weakness- add the stress of his 1st son being banished because 'well fuck he's just like the banished child and needs to learn not to be' and the stress of Loki finding out who he really is/that originally he planned to use him and Loki refused to let him explain further and instead went full out pissed and yelling at a weak old man)

Now there is that deleted scene where Frigga gives him the title BUT IT DOES NOT FIT INTO THE MOVIE. Rewatch it, try to place that scene. It doesn't fit. Loki is playing King before he speaks with Frigga in that deleted scene- which was shortened and edited in after he's already playing king. It does not fully apply to the canon of the movie because of this technicality. So for all we know- he took the title without Frigga's knowledge. So during that first rule, what did Loki do? A)closed off the Bifrost to prevent Thor's return B)Sent the Destroyer to kill Thor, and even told it to destroy everything in the little town Thor was in -with no regard for the lives which could be lost because of his actions. C)Allowed Laufey into Jotunheim, and let's be real Laufey could have easily turned around, stabbed Loki, and then gone off to kill Frigga and Odin. D)Let Laufey hit Frigga, played perfect hero son only after Laufey was already on top of Odin about to stab him, and pretended not to know a thing, like 'Lol how'd he get here idk mother but I'll protect you even though he already flung you across the room'

Loki's rule should technically end when Thor returns. But even then, Loki has Gungnir, which is basically saying he's still in some way in charge and what does he do with this power? He takes the kings staff to the Bifrost with the intent of destroying an entire planet after already murdering his biological father/a king, putting Asgard in danger, and his own king and queen-his adoptive parents, in a very dangerous position. -Frigga may be good with small knives but she was struggling with that sword.

Let's move to rule 2.

Take into consideration everything he did in Midgard- bringing an alien army to attack the planet, killing over 80 people in like 2 days, causing destruction and chaos in New York which would later lead to the problems in later MCU movies that take place in Midgard (Spiderman Homecoming is a good example) and let' not forget having mind slaves he completely damaged. All of this was in his conquest to gain enough power to be king. But we know Midgard was never the end game for Loki- it was always Asgard. And remorse? Yeah, not really there. He has a brief moment of 'It's too late', but he uses that to stab Thor- meaning he was likely playing on Thor's emotions knowing Thor would fall for his puppy eyes.

So Loki's imprisoned (for showing no remorse and acting like everything is just a silly children's game-and Odin knows where it is headed because of Hela), he's not in any way a king or ruler of anything, but even in his cell he inadvertently causes Frigga's death in hoping to send Algrim/Kurse to Odin and Thor. 'I don't think the people of Asgard would take kindly to a king who murdered their predecessor' -So I'll send someone else to do it for me. (Because who is next in line if Thor and Odin die? Loki, you know if they hadn't decided to do that fuck up of 'lol Hela is their older sister now', but I digress.) The fact is Loki never shows real guilt or remorse until he realizes he is the reason that Frigga, the only person still giving him any chance and sneaking around to speak with him, died. So the story goes -he sets off, helps Thor, even protects Jane, and then fakes his death. Again. Both times were different though- I believe he truly believed he'd die if he let go of Mjolnir's handle based off the tie in Avengers comic-they believed Loki would be torn to shreds by the world tree. But in this fake death, it's all Loki. He gets up, brushes off, returns to Asgard.

So how does he get to be king the second time? He curses Odin, banishes him in Midgard in a retirement home -and never checks up to be like 'oh yeah whatever happened to dad?'- which leads to Odin being a homeless vagabond just chilling in Norway waiting to see his sons one last time. In the meantime, Loki gives Thor what he wants and sends him to Midgard. Of course, Thor says he returned to Asgard once in AOU- but did he really? He would have caught on that Odin wasn't Odin if he really had. (Really it's a shame they wouldn't let Joss focus on Thor like he wanted) - So that mention of going to Asgard in AOU-let's assume Loki was off doing Loki things and avoiding Thor. Which leads to Thor traveling the universe for YEARS trying to find answers about the Infinity Stones. -A mess Loki helped make worse, but that began in Captain America. (Thanks, Red Skull.)

So what's Loki doing while Thor's off trying to save the universe? He's ignoring Asgards duties, which leads to the Dwarves slaughter and the gauntlet being made (of course he may have thought he had the real and only gauntlet in the vault). Loki gathers up some bad actors, writes his own little play, erects a giant statue of himself, MOCKS FRIGGA'S DEATH by making his 'sacrifice' in avenging her a total joke in the play and by laughing at it, and maybe even hoes around with the servant ladies that surround him while he watches the play. Which if he did- further mocks Frigga and Odin.

Thor arrives and calls him out on his shit, his reign is pretty much done for. But Thor doesn't get the chance to rule, he has to clean Loki's mess and get Odin, and then he has to clean Odin's mess with Hela. Thor tries to prevent Hela from reaching Asgard, but Loki shouts for the gate to be open-if Heimdall was in charge of the gate and saw this shit he would have kept it closed. Just saying. So Loki gives Hela an opening to put Asgard and its people in danger- which if she had won in the end, would have led to death and chaos across the universe. But that's not how the story goes. Thor and Loki get thrown into Sakaar. Loki's been there for weeks and is just mingling and partying, making jokes about his first death, and while he's stolen ship passcodes-is making no real effort to leave and go fight for his people. But that is all Thor is worried about and wants to do. Even when Thor is a slave, locked up and unable to do much but fight to get his freedom, he only thinks of returning to Asgard to save the people. Loki even tries to prevent Thor from doing so for money.-and possibly being petty that Thor would not go with his plan to escape together and ignore Asgard, let it burn. Thor escapes, he fights for his people- and Loki turns up afterwards, only to ham it up and be a big diva like 'LOOK I AM BRINGING A BIG SHIP AND I AM SAVING YOU ALL WITH IT' -yes, he fights, yes, in the end, he pledges allegiance to Asgard, but his actions prior to his Infinity War death are not the actions of a good king, only a selfish man. He and Thor both understand ruling well, but they both understand different aspects, and Loki's is the toxic form, while Thor's is the good-natured and humble form. Combining them together=great king.

If Thanos hadn't of come, Thor would still have people to care for and rule over, but he doesn't. He has nothing. He's a space hobo now. His rule would have been much longer than Loki's, and, in an ideal world, they could have learned to work together to combine their understanding of what it means to be king. But that world doesn't exist.

#just my two cents #ignore me #i agree loki got to rule longer- but someone said loki did it better and uhhh hahaha no

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soldierstark · 7 years

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Late Night Magic | Part 2 | LOKI LAUFEYSON X READER

Description: Nightmares are a common occurrence for the reader as her power emanates darkness and danger. This leads to an odd connection between her and Loki who resonates with her through 2:30 am conversations.

Author’s Note: Ya’ll really enjoyed Late Night Magic and with so many requests for a part 2, I couldn’t not write one so here it is. I pulled this out of my ass in like an hour and a half and I think I turned out pretty well. I especially like the dream sequence. Anyways, as always I appreciate feedback and I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think!

Word Count: 1891

FANFICTION MASTERLIST | Part 1

The onslaught of hard liquor down my throat lead to me having a coughing fit as I slammed the shot glass down onto the counter. I wiped my mouth violently and leaned against the counter, my (Y/H/C) hair falling over my shoulders and covering my face.

“Why the sudden change from tea to whiskey?” a voice asked, breaking the eerie silence that overcame the Avengers Tower while everyone else with a normal sleep schedule, well, slept.

I looked up and shook my hair out of sight, coming face to face with the only other person who was ever up at this time of night, Loki. He approached me casually before leaning his elbows against the counter opposite from me.

“Another nightmare?” he asked in a soft voice. Loki’s face looked relaxed aside from the fact that his eyebrows were scrunched together. It was almost as if he were… concerned.

I reached a hand up and pushed a stray piece of hair behind my ear, looking away from his piercing gaze. A dry laugh escaped my lips along with a flush of color to my cheeks as I recalled the dream that woke me up tonight.

“I wouldn’t call it a nightmare per say,” I trailed off, looking back up at Loki. “It was just rather… well… strange is the only way I can think to describe it.” My hand gripped the bottle of whiskey carefully as I poured myself another shot.

“Care to elaborate?” he asked, quirking an eyebrow.

“Not to you particularly no,” I replied, downing another shot of alcohol.

“And why is that?” Loki prodded. When I didn’t respond he asked another question. “Was I in it?”

I shook my head and shrugged my shoulders, trying to seem nonchalant. “No,” I lied through my teeth.

Loki stood up straight and crossed his arms over his chest. He tilted his head to the side slightly and studied my demeanor carefully with a smirk. I got the sudden urge to shiver though I wasn’t cold.

“You know (Y/N), though I am the god of mischief, I am also the god of lying. Do you really think I wouldn’t be able to see your dishonesty?” he quipped sounding amused.

I pursed my lips and began screwing the cap back onto the bottle of whiskey. 2:37 am on a Tuesday was not the time to be getting drunk off my ass. “No, I was just hoping you’d ignore it.”

“And why would I do that?”

“Because it’s too late for you to be picking an argument with a girl who could literally destroy you with a simple touch,” I replied monotonously, putting the bottle away into the cabinet above the cups where it belonged.

I turned around to face Loki again, leaning my back against the kitchen counter. The moon light streaming in through the wall of widows a few feet away gave Loki’s silhouette a silver lining. Much like that of a cloud obscuring the sun’s afternoon rays.

“I thought we already established that you wouldn’t do that?” he retorted cheekily before clearing his throat. “But seriously (Y/N), what was the dream about. It must’ve been quite odd to wake you up at this hour.”

I chewed my bottom lip slightly and looked down at my bare feet which rested upon the cold kitchen tile. I could feel Loki’s gaze burning into my skin during the moment of silence that overcame us before I replied.

“Yea…. Quite strange it was,” I answered vaguely, recalling the dream I had awoken from mere minutes ago.

“I don’t know how much longer we can hold them off,” I gasped out between labored breaths. I swung my silver katana around me, skillfully killing any one of Hela’s undead soldiers that came my way.

Loki and the Valkyrie girl along with Bruce all ended up in the same vicinity that I was in. We were all using the various weapons we had on us the fight off the army of soldiers.

“Heimdall needs to get the civilians onto the ship faster… they’re just gonna keep coming and there’s no way we can kill all of these,” the Valkyrie girl yelled, twisting around to stab another one of the undead from behind.

My arms were burning in protest despite the rush of adrenaline I received from battle. Epinephrine can only get you so far when it comes to physical fatigue. I was starting to feel the effects of battle both mentally and physically.

Things couldn’t go on like this much longer and from the look of things, we had a long way to go.

“We don’t need to kill all of them,” Loki ground out between the stabs he took with his two knives. “We just need to buy Thor more time to kill that bitch.”

My ears perked up at the Princes words, and idea forming in my mind that might just be the solution we were all looking for. I maneuvered myself through the hoard of undead soldiers while simultaneously fighting them off.

“Loki,” I yelled once I got closer to him.

“What?” he yelled back sounding distracted, still fighting off Hela’s soldiers.

“You and the others need to get on the ship along with the civilians,” I said quickly. “You’ve got to get off this planet.”

Loki was able to steal a glance at me for a split second before he had to turn his attention back to fighting. “What? No! I’m not leaving you here (Y/N). You’ll get killed,” he replied exasperated.

“I’ll be fine Loki, I do have a plan you know. Plus it’s not like we have any other option,” I argued back. “What do you suppose we do instead? Stand here and fight to our deaths?”

Despite the seriousness of the situation, Loki let out and indigent snort, stabbing an undead soldier through the skull. “I think we should do something that won’t end in a suicide mission for you. I don’t even need to hear your plan to know that’s what it is.”

“Loki for the last time I’ll be fine! For the love of all things please just get everyone on the ship,” I demanded, swinging my katana in a wide arc taking out 4 soldiers.

I stood up straight and looked over at Loki, having an undisputed staring contest with him. His eyes were filled with unreadable emotion as he surged closer to be me, pulling me into him by the waist.

I let out a gasp of surprise as he leaned his head down and pressed his lips against mine firmly. I tensed up slightly but relaxed into the kiss almost immediately after, returning it with fervently.

Loki’s lips were surprisingly soft and warm, the feeling that shot through my body at the sensation was indescribable. Despite the battle going on around us, I felt perfectly safe in that moment wrapped in his arms.

The kiss ended almost as quickly as it started, both of us pulling apart for air.

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Loki said softly, so soft that I could barely hear him over the sound of the battle raging on around us. And with one last smile, he started making his way towards the ship. The rest of the ‘revengers’ following suit.

I quickly sheathed my katana and made fists with both of my hands. I hit my wrists together two times and on the third, black flames erupted from my palms like fireworks.

Ever since I discovered my power of cataclysm, a little part of my focus had always been spent on keeping it under control. Never had I ever been able to give something my undivided attention out of fear of losing control all together.

For the first time ever, I didn’t have to fear losing control, because that was all a part of the plan.

I let the power of destruction over take me and in one swift move, I shot my hands out and watched as Asgard began to crumble to ruins around me.

“The dream itself isn’t what’s bothering me Loki. It’s the meaning behind it,” I breathed out, wringing my hands together nervously. “Yesterday you said the dreams are reflections of your subconscious, well my subconscious is telling me something that I really don’t feel like dealing with.”

Loki licked his lips, not taking his eyes off of me. I found myself entranced by the motion. Man was in deep. Of all the people I could possibly get a crush on, my mind just had to start liking this thousand year old Prince from an alien planet.

I had such great taste in men.

“I’m just curious as to what this all has to do with me,” Loki admitted.

I pushed myself off the counter and made a move to exit the kitchen. “It’s not important Loki,” I grumbled trying to push past him.

Loki’s arm reached out and gently grabbed me by the elbow, halting my movement. “And where do you think you’re going?”

I rolled my eyes. “Back to bed.”

He let out a deep chuckle and shook his head playfully. “Nuh uh. Not until you tell me about your dream and what I was doing in it.”

I threw my head back with a groan. “For someone as old as you are you can be really immature. Will you please let me go to bed?”

“If you want to go back to bed that bad, all you have to do is tell me about your dream (Y/N)”

I let out an exasperated sigh and gave Loki an indignant look. “How about I show you?” I compromised, the shots of whiskey I took giving me some courage I otherwise wouldn’t have.

Loki gave me a heart stopping smirk. “Even better.”

Taking a step forward, I wrapped one hand around the back of Loki’s neck while the other made it’s way through his long dark hair. Standing up on my toes, I pulled his head down to mine and kissed him firmly on the lips.

He reciprocated almost immediately and wrapped an arm around my waist while the other went around my back, pressing me closer to him. Our lips move in synch as I rummage my hands through his hair, messing it up undoubtedly.

I pull Loki’s face even closer to mine, electing a deep, lustful moan from the back of his throat. For what seems like forever, we kiss deeply without another care in the world.

That is, until we’re interrupted by the millionaire who owns the very kitchen we were making out in. “What the hell guys?” Tony groans huskily, rubbing his eyes wearily. “It’s like 3 in the morning go to sleep.”

Loki and I break apart and turn quickly towards the voice of Tony Stark, putting as much distance between ourselves as possible.

“You know what,” Tony starts waving his hand dismissively. “I don’t even care anymore do whatever the hell you want. Just clean up when you’re done will ya? Thanks.” He finishes with a yawn, turning around and walking back down the hallway towards his room.

I let out a quiet laugh and look over at Loki. “Good night Prince Loki,” I say jokingly, making a move to leave the kitchen.

“Good night Lady (Y/N),” he replies with a smile, finally allowing to pass him and go back to bed.

Tagged: @holamora @sherlokidlikeshit @domcaaa996 @iamhamburglar

#loki laufeyson #loki x reader #loki laufeyson x reader #loki fanfic #loki odinson #loki odinson x reader #thor #thor ragnarok #marvel imagine #loki (marvel)#loki #marvel imagines #marvel #off #fanfiction

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