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215.
Once the horse was out of the way, Random looked around for something to eat. Since he didn’t get to eat anything under the tree and all he could think about now was food, he went searching for something that would hit the spot.
Random looked all over the store but didn’t see anything that looked really good to him. He then thought way too much about all the options and felt like he was making a once in a lifetime decision when it was a millionth in a lifetime decision and he wouldn’t even remember what he decided a day from now.
Random finally gave up overthinking what he wanted to eat and picked the next thing he saw. He opened the package and started to eat. As he was eating, he didn’t feel like he made the right decision and instantly regretted what he had picked.
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214.
Random yelped from the pain. He quickly rubbed his skin where the bubble had touched it. That felt a little better but before Random could do anything else another bubble popped on his other arm and then another bubble popped on top of his head. Random started to scream more from the frustration of getting hit by burning bubbles than the pain they inflicted. Random didn’t enjoy this activity at all so he ran under some trees for cover.
Once Random saw he was safe from the burning bubbles, he looked around at his new surroundings. He found there was a gorgeous spread of food elegantly displayed. Random wondered who the food was for. He looked around and didn’t see anyone, so he decided to make himself a plate and eat some food.
The second Random touched the first piece of food he was transported to the middle of a grocery store. There he saw a cartoon bear eating honey out of a large jar and some bats playing chess. Before Random could react, a horse nudged him in the back and told him to get out of the way. Random stepped aside to allow the horse to move past him.
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213.
Once outside Random was pleased to find it had stopped raining. There also wasn’t any indication there would be lightning strikes anywhere nearby. Random breathed a sigh of relief but was startled to see bubbles floating down from the sky. It appeared the sky was raining bubbles now. They didn’t look scary or harmful in anyway, but the sight of seeing them was so different, they gave Random a start. After watching them for a few seconds Random felt calmer. Then one of the bubbles touched Random’s skin and slightly burned him when it popped on his exposed flesh.
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212.
Random was a little freaked out that he almost got electrocuted so he went inside to get away from all the lightning. Once inside Random cursed himself because he forgot his facemask in the car. He didn’t want to go back outside in the rain and lightning to get it, so he pulled his shirt up over his nose. This worked for a hot second until a salamander dropped on his head. Random let go of his shirt to swat the salamander away and when he did that a bucket of water was thrown in his face.
Random whisked the water from his eyes to see a group of treefrogs glaring at him. Random didn’t know what to make of the situation and he didn’t like how everyone was looking at him, so he went back outside to brave the elements.
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211.
Random didn’t want to be bothered anymore by trying to figure out if he could influence events in his life by his thoughts. It seemed like a lot of experimenting was needed and the results could possibly never be truly verified, so Random decided to move on and do something else with his time.
Random saw the ant crawling on the sidewalk and he thought it would be a good idea to get some food, so Random walked over to the fountain and threw a few pennies in. He made a wish and knew it would never come true so wondered why he just threw money away like that. Since it was only a few cents he didn’t really care all that much. Random saw the leaves blowing in the wind. It was strange because the leaves were attached to the hat of the man writing the e-mail to his friends.
This was all fine and dandy but Random really wanted to do something exciting. He looked all around and didn’t see anything of interest, so he decided to fly a kite. That was okay and sort of fun until it got struck by lightning. Luckily Random let go of the string before he could get electrocuted.
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210.
Random wanted to test out his theory so he thought about good positive things. He really concentrated on positive feelings and tried to feel as much of the positive energy flow through him as possible.
He then went about his day expecting miracles to manifest countless times in front of him. The first thing he saw was a giant hippo eating ice cream. Random didn’t know what to make of that so he didn’t count that as anything and moved on.
The next things Random saw was a college student writing a paper on a laptop. Random didn’t know what to make of that either so he moved on again.
Then Random saw a beautiful landscape in the best possible weather. He knew this was a good thing from his positive thoughts. Then it suddenly started to rain. Random got soaked within seconds. He didn’t think this was a result of his positive thoughts but since he was only thinking positive thoughts why would the weather change so drastically and quickly like that? Did having positive or negative thoughts have any influence over anything other than your own mood?
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209.
Random felt pretty good with everything that was going on. He hoped things would continue to go well and he would feel happy. He knew that life wasn’t like that and it was inevitable that things would go downhill at some point. Random wondered how much he influenced things going bad from him having expectations that they would. If he didn’t ever expect anything to go wrong, when things did go wrong would they be less severe than if he was expecting something to go wrong? Did he have the power to make things worse by focusing on negative things? At the same time did he have the power to make things better by focusing on positive things?
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208.
As Random picked himself up off the ground and rubbed his face where it slammed into the ground, he wondered if karma was actually a thing and it just let him know of its existence. Random didn’t think so but at the same time he didn’t want to completely ignore it in case it was real. He decided he would try to give more of a fuck about other peoples’ feelings, but he would also be sure to make sure he didn’t get walked all over in the process.
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207.
Random didn’t know what to say. He slowly started to remember who he was talking to but wasn’t certain. He just wanted to hang up but couldn’t bring himself to it. He wondered why he couldn’t just hang up without saying a word. It wasn’t like he was going to see this person or talk to them ever again. For some reason he felt like he couldn’t, and he didn’t like how powerless he felt. The person on the other end of the phone started to go off on Random and that snapped him out of his paralysis. He suddenly didn’t get a fuck about this person or what they were saying to him. He hung up the call and felt great to be done with it.
Random strode off feeling good for overcoming his fear of how someone he would never talk to again, felt about him. Then he tripped over a stone and fell face first into the hard ground.
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pendulumwrites · 11 days ago
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I’ve been here before. I‘ve heard the dull hum of the city on a rainy day many times. More than I’d like to admit. I don’t always intend for this to happen, but it does. When I look back at him sleeping peacefully, I feel nothing but hatred. The memories of the previous night sweep over me.
‘I love you Scarlett’ he whispered in my ear, I felt nothing except for the warmth of his breath on my ear.
I shudder thinking about those words he so carelessly uttered. If only he knew the real me if only he knew my plan for him.
I reach deep down in my dressing gown pocket and pull out my lighter and a cigarette. I can barely light the damn thing. The tremble in my hands doesn’t stop, I tell myself it’s because of the rain, it keeps patting down, I reach my free hand over the ledge and feel the numbing specks. The rains not ideal, I wish I could control the weather like I can control Jeff. He always was a fool, a sad little fool who just needed one pretty girl to bat her eyelashes at him.
I’m so bored of him talking about the stocks, bored of his predictable gifts, bored, bored, bored. I had to keep going though. Part of me thought maybe I might be happy with him, isn’t that the way it always goes? Oh, how I had such hope for him. What a big disappointment he was. He turned out like the rest, a filthy man going about his pointless life, doing pointless things. I decided young I wasn’t going to be like the rest of them. I’m helping him put an end to the pointlessness.
I take a puff of my cigarette before taking a look back. He’s starting to stir. I watch as he gets out of bed in his trance-like state. He wraps the bedsheet around himself and joins me on the balcony.
‘The rains not so pleasant is it?’ he says,
‘Yes, it makes my plans harder.’ I reply,
‘And what plans would those be my dear?’
If only you knew.
‘You’ll see.’
Not soon enough.
I take another puff waiting for him to say something.
‘You know how I feel about that disgusting habit,’ he finally says, the disgust slipping into his voice.
‘You know how I feel about you telling me what to do.’ Snidely I reply.
‘Please don’t do this again,’ he presses
‘Fine,’ I say as I fling the cigarette off the balcony.
He sighs to himself, disappointed in me once again it seems.
It wouldn’t matter what I did.
He takes my arm and pulls me into him. It’s close now. He kisses the top of my head as I start to prepare. I reposition myself so he is leaning against the balcony railing.
‘Jeff,’ I say in anticipation.
‘Yes,’ he replies
As I pull away I catch a glimpse of the confusion on his face as I push him. He of course falls.
‘Scarlett!’ he screams, filling the void.
It never gets any easier.
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206.
With the lion knocked out and no other immediate dangers present Random slowed his sprint down to a light jog. It felt pretty good to jog off all the adrenaline that was surging through his body. Now Random didn’t know what to do with himself, so he picked up his phone and started to scroll through his contacts. He found someone he had no recollection as to who they are so he figured it would be fun to give them a call. He dialed the number and within a few seconds a disgruntled voice answered. Random said hi and the voice asked what he wanted. Random didn’t know what to say, so he said he was just calling to say hi. The voice didn’t understand since he ghosted her after their second date three months ago, so why was he calling her now? Was he drunk and alone scrolling through his phone looking to hookup with anyone who would respond?
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205.
Just as the lion was a few seconds away from coming in contact with Random, Random suddenly didn’t want to get eaten. He wanted very much to live a long and happy life. With this sudden desire not to be eaten, Random turned on his heels and ran as fast as his legs could carry him. Of course, his speed was no match for that of a full-grown lion, but the lion wasn’t prepared for Random to suddenly move at the last second and it didn’t have enough time to adjust its speed, so it ran right past him. As it did the lion turned its head and twisted its body to turn around for another go. Unfortunately, for the lion when it turned its head, it didn’t see the tree it was headed straight for. Before the lion could initiate the full turn, it slammed into the tree knocking itself out cold.
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pendulumwrites · 16 days ago
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The feeling of home
I miss the feeling,
I believe it’s what they call happiness.
All I feel is the struggle.
I’m being weighed down by 100 things,
And to you none of them matter
But they still matter to me.
Even if you don’t believe me.
Even if no one believes me
I believe me. I believe in what happened and it was real.
I want some peace.
I want to go to bed and not hear the cars anymore.
They are always going.
I want to take the snus and hallucinate I’m dancing.
I want to fall asleep in my bed.
I want to hear you make the coffee in the mornings, always leaving me a cup.
Wake up to good morning texts from you.
Look outside the window and know that even though the suns not here I am.
Pretend we are soccer mum and drink wine and red bull.
Take photos of your beautiful face,
Cry because my heart hurts and the scars are multiplying.
I want so many things
I want to go home, but I’m not sure where home is anymore.
I miss the peace.
Let me rejoice,
Let me smile.
Let me look up and think of you like you do with me.
Let me hear your laugh and your tears as I close the door.
Let me in.
Please never let go of me,
I want so bad to stop falling,
Shield me, protect me.
Help me find that feeling again.
- the feeling of home
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204.
Random was paralyzed. He just stood there watching this enormous cat charge at him. He very much wanted to get out of the way, but he just couldn’t move a muscle. He then felt a kind of peace. He knew he was going to die, and he was okay with that since he also knew he was going to evolve to the next realm, and he was getting more and more excited about that as the lion got closer and closer.
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pendulumwrites · 20 days ago
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Sometimes I look up at the sky and I wonder are you looking back?
We’re under the same sky and yet we’re so far apart.
I haven’t seen these stars for a year.
But I’d rather see the stars I saw with you.
When we walked and I ran away.
I was so happy.
I look back and I don’t recognise that girl.
But I’m trying too
I thought yesterday how hard it seems
And unfair
So cruel
So fucking cruel.
My dad always said the world was cruel and he wish he could hide from it.
I don’t want to hide from it though
Sometimes I want to hide from my life but not the world.
Because you taught me how beautiful it is and maybes the pains worth it.
Maybe?
Maybe?
Maybe?
I’ve thought about love
And the love I experienced far far away.
Everyone deserves to feel that
It’s beautiful
It’s incredible
And it’s a fucking mess.
But I wouldn’t change it for the world.
When I think of our goodbye
I cry.
Too think, I closed the door.
I can’t
I can’t
I can’t
I won’t
I won’t let you go.
Don’t let me go.
I’m not ready to soar
Don’t let go
And don’t you dare soar without me.
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203.
Random felt around in the dark until he found a light switch and flipped it on. When the lights came on, he saw he was in the middle of a grass field. The grass was about waist high and moved back and forth like it was being blown by the wind, but there wasn’t any wind. Random picked up a flat rock and skipped it across the surface of the grass. He was pleased to see it skip about a dozen times before dropping down into the grass. Random knew almost the second he threw the rock that it probably wasn’t a very good idea to throw a rock into waist high grass that could be hiding just about anything or nothing at all.
Of course, in this particular instance the rock did come in contact with a snoozing lion, who wasn’t happy about getting a rock thrown at its head. It promptly stood up and fixed its eyes on Random. Random stood very still thinking that if he moved, it would attract the attention of the lion who was looking at him like it wanted to kill him. The standing still thing didn’t do any good. The lion charged at Random.
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202.
Random coughed again and then put on the straw hat that was next to him. Random shouldn’t have been surprised when the hat caught on fire, but he was. He jumped back in the water to get away from the fire before it burned him alive.
Once in the water Random picked up the stapler that was floating by and started to staple the water. This of course didn’t do anything so Random picked up some paper and marbles and tried to staple those together. That didn’t work either. Random was a little annoyed he couldn’t find anything to staple so he discarded the stapler and jumped on the waterslide. The waterslide didn’t really work at all since it was underwater and gravity wasn’t helping push him down the slide so Random blew a bubble with his chewing gum and floated to the surface. As his head broke the surface Random found himself in a warehouse full of undisclosed boxes. Random touched a box and then the lights went out.
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pendulumwrites · a month ago
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I don’t want to lie awake thinking of this.
I don’t want to look through my camera roll.
It’s filled with those memories,
12000 of them to be precise.
Fuck
Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck
I remember the story behind everyone.
I don’t know who I am anymore
Or what I’m doing,
I don’t really feel like a person
More like a ghost
Consumed by the past
And struggling to move on.
Or forget
There so far away.
It’s so far away
There’s no fucking beauty in this pain.
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201.
After Random relieved himself, he swam over to the ladder and climbed up on the burning oilrig. It wasn’t a good idea to climb on something that was on fire, but it was at least a place to sit and rest instead of treading water for hours on end. The fire wasn’t covering every square inch so Random was able to find a few square feet to hang out on and not get burned. Then Random saw a seagull fly by with a plastic straw in its mouth. It then dropped the straw and Random coughed. He didn’t know if the two things were related or if he was coughing due to breathing in enormous amounts of smoke. He figured it was because of the dropped straw.
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