#I saw your other post you got a good….. mark? is that like a grade in the states?? I wouldn’t know anyway I didn’t get grades LMAO

[foxgloveinspace]

hello hello!

so i got my mark back on my sleep token visual analysis last night (still cracks me up that i went ahead and wrote about them lol)

and sleep blessed me with another dream about the band!

this was a super meta dream cuz like. okay first i dreamt that i went out to a concert with my family, but i can’t for the life of me remember who it was. after we left that show i went home and then dreamed within my dream. at least, i think that’s how it went. idk it just felt different lmao

anyways, the inner dream was that after i’d left the earlier show, i found out that there was a last minute sleep token show in my city (there’s the dream lol, they’ll never come here)

i got into the show and somehow at the end ended up between the barrier and the stage. vessel jumped down and was thanking the fans and so basically i was like. trying to get through the pathway between stage and barrier while he was following 😂

when we got to the end i stepped aside to let him by and instead got a hug and then when he stepped back he just like, held my face. dream-me may have teared up a little lmao

Sorry I kept this ask for a couple weeks, I liked coming back and reading the end and going ‘wow. That’s so amazing for Exie. I hope they have another dream like this soon.’🤣 I blame the cold for how weirdly sentimental I got over your dream🤣🤣

#I saw your other post you got a good….. mark? is that like a grade in the states?? I wouldn’t know anyway I didn’t get grades LMAO #but it was good yeah? #dang. wish sleep would bless me with good sleep token dreams #I did have a pretty unusual one two nights ago about like. Peter Pan type lost boys but they where cowboys and also there was demons. #ok I meant like a group of run aways they where all college age cause the demons definitely fell into the dark romance category lmao #uhhhh. yeah. idk. I’ve been thinking about it none stop if I’m being honest cause it was one of those ones that felt like entering a new #dimension…. it was. vivid. I can’t really remember what I dreamed about last night😮‍💨 #oops got rambly again sorry #hihi!!! #Exie😁 #excelsior9173 #Is that the right emoji??? damn…. #I knew I would forget my own tag for you😔 #I will come back and fix it if I got it wrong

[anonymouse1312437]

Warning:

Hey everyone. This is a fanfiction with a lot of details and a backstory. If it is not your thing then I am sorry. This is more than just a smut. It will have fluff, angst, heartache, heartbreak, mentions of mental health.  

The character is going to struggle with things such as: 

Abuse, Sexual Assault, Eating Disorder, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts and attempts, as well as Degradation.  

The highlights: 

Smut, heavy rough and fluffy smut, age-gap relationships, choking, biting, marking, hair pulling, Degradation from a love interest (Or many), humiliation (kink), breathe play, unprotected sex (Of any and all kinds), multiple people moments, creampies, and more.  

  This is not for anyone under 18. Minors DNI.  

There is multiple POVs. If that is not your thing I understand. Smut wont start until chapter 4. I have written up until then. I will post a chapter every other day if I can. Maybe everyday depending on how if I can keep up with the writing.  

I want to keep some of the character relationships to a surprise but, if you look at the tags you will see who will be mentioned throughout the books.  

Thanks for reading if you do. I will also be posting this story on Wattpad and AO3 once I have an active account on AO3 that is.  

All characters were made by J.K. Rowling and I am not taking credit for the development of the characters.  

The timeline will be messed up in this writing. I am trying to mend it in a way that this could work with the storyline.  

Chapter One:

“Jess I can’t wait to get back to school. What about you?” I asked.  

“I don’t know why you would think that I was excited about this. I suck at the school here.” Jess said. I can’t believe that she would say that she doesn’t do well at the school here. Everyone envied the grades she would receive. I mean an A in most of her classes and some of which were B’s.  

“Remember the word for the store front is DragonAly.” My aunt said. Yeah, yeah whatever. We have done this a few times. Nothing that she says is going to be important. It’s not like there is another wizarding school in the world. Right? I mean we haven’t heard of another one.  

“We will see you on the other side.” My aunt said and cast her wand up and was no longer in the room with us. My friend Jess was next to go and then when I cast my wand up, I ended up getting tongue tied. I am not even sure how it sounded when it came out. I felt like I had been punched in the gut and then I was standing inside of a fireplace. What the hell? Where am I?  

“Hello? Did I hear someone in here?” I heard someone. Wait. This person didn’t sound like me. I couldn’t stop coughing.  

“Oh dear. Are you okay? What are you doing in here?” A nice red hair woman asked. She is British though.  

“I- I think I am okay. Where am I?” I asked her. The shock on her face probably mirrored the shock on mine when I heard her voice.  

“My, my dear. Are you American? How did you get all the way over here?” She asked. Oh no.  

“Wait, am I?” I started to ask.  

“Honey you are not in America. Where were you trying to go? Good heavens get out of the fireplace dear. Here let me help you.” She said and held her hand out to me. I grabbed her hand and started to pull myself out of the fireplace.  

“Ron dear come help me.” She hollered out. I saw a red-haired boy come around the corner and run up to his mom. I assume it is his mother at least.  

“Who is this mom?” He asked. Also, British. I can’t believe I am not at home anymore.  

She looked at me like she was waiting for me to fill that information in for her because I had not said what my name is yet.  

“I am y/n) I am from Oregon. I have no idea how I got here. I was just trying to get to school. I think when I said my destination my words became jumbled, and I must have said the wrong thing. I must have said something similar. Might I ask where I am exactly?” I asked, stumbling the words out as I said them because I was speaking too fast.  

“You are at Diagon Alley. Where were you supposed to go?” The woman asked me. “Does it sound similar to where you were supposed to go?” 

“Yes, I was supposed to go to DragonAly. I don’t feel so good.” I said and looked down.  

“Oh dear. Why don’t you come with me. I am Molly Weasley. This is one of my son’s Ron. Why don’t we get you to a phone and you can call your family. Let them know that you are okay.” She said. I smiled at her kindness.  

“I really hope I am not putting you out of your way. I am sorry for intruding.” I said.  

“Oh, hush darling. I am sure your family is worried sick.” Mrs. Weasley said. She escorted me back out to a building with her son behind us and she just kept talking.  

“Hold on dear. Stay right here. Arthur! Arthur! Darling something has happened!” She hollered. She walked off towards a taller gentleman. Another red-haired person. Wow they must be more common here than where I am from back home.  

“Well, hello there, I am Arthur Weasley. I see that you have met my wife. Did you just get here when my wife found you?” He asked. I nodded. I felt my stomach squeeze. I felt a sharp pain in my chest and then I blacked out. I felt my body go limp and then after that I don’t know what happened.  

Sometime must have passed because I woke up in bed. This is not my room, and my head hurts horribly.  

“Hello?” I mumbled.  

“Mom! She is awake!” Ron yelled out. I swear I thought that I was dreaming but, no I am not in my country anymore.  

“Oh, Ron hush your mouth. Poor thing probably has a headache. You go on now hun. I am going to see if she can tell me her phone number.” I saw Mrs. Weasley pull out a wand and walk over to me. She is like me. Probably why she did not freak out when she saw me in a fireplace.  

“Sweetheart, are you able to tell me your family's number?” She asked.  

“901-444-8231 it’s my school. You can reach them by wand.” I said and it came out quietly.  

“I will give them a call. They might be able to tell your loved ones for me.” She said and smiled. She stepped out of the room again dialing the number and almost immediately someone answered the phone. She looked a little distraught, which told me that whoever she was speaking to was not good. This can’t be good. Nothing of this can be good.  

“Darling, would you take her some of the tea I just made.” She said to Ron.  

“Yes mom.” He said and grabbed a cup of tea and walked towards me. He set it down on the table that was next to me. I sat up and still felt the pain in my stomach so I attempted to move slowly.  

“You are kidding me!” Mrs. Weasley yelled into the phone. My guess is she just found out that I didn’t have a mother and father. That my aunt was taking care of me and she didn’t care much for me either. Me ending up here wasn’t going to be much different from being over there. I was going to be unwanted anywhere I end up.  

“Well then, she can stay put. We have a school she can attend here. It’s the best school there is so that will be that.” Mrs. Weasley said and then ended the call on the wand. She walked off towards Mr. Weasley and I assume she was telling him about the phone call. What does she mean that I will just stay put? I mean I don’t want to impose them. She doesn’t even know much about me other than my age.  

“Dear?” I didn’t realize that she had come back already and with Mr. Weasley in tow.  

“I spoke to your school. It appears your aunt has given up guardianship of you. They want to take you out of your school because of that. Now I don’t want you to miss out on your education and Mr. Weasley and I, well, we would like to help enroll you in the Wizarding program here. That is if you're okay with that?” she asked with some tears in her eyes. 

 I couldn’t help but cry. She did what? Even if she did only keep me because she was getting money from the state because of my parents death and the fact that I was also her maid and chef. My cousin isn’t even anything like me but, is loved so much. I can’t believe that this happened. I mean come on. Why couldn’t this have happened when I was not trapped in a different country. Oh god it hurts. I always felt unwanted but, that didn’t make it true. Yet now it was true. There was no denying it. There was no denying that I am an orphan. I hate myself. This is crap.  

“Oh sweetheart. It will be okay. Come here.” Mrs. Weasley said and pulled me close to her. She hugged onto me tightly and I just continued to sob into her. I haven’t had this. I haven’t had someone hug me before little own hold me. It was nice and soothing, but the tears did not stop. Thankfully I learned how to be quiet when crying ages ago when people would tease me about my parents' death at my school.  

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to impose. You don’t have to take care of me. I can leave.” I said, trying not to meet her eyes.  

“Oh, honey it really is no problem. Let me call the school and see what I can do. It is about to start so it might be a bit difficult but, I am sure I can figure something out.” Mrs. Weasley said.  

“Thank you. Thank you for helping me.” I said. She was being so kind.  

“Absolutely. Drink the tea darling. It will help with your stomach and chest pains.” She said.  

I took the cup from the table and sipped some of it. This did not taste good but, I guess if it is to help me get better I am going to have to deal with it. I mean I need this feeling to go away.  

“Mr. Weasley is already on the phone with the school so if you don’t want that please let me know.” She said and I smiled.  

“I think I would really like it here.” I said. She smiled big at my words.  

“Harry!” Ron yelled out. Who is Harry?  

“Come now, Ron has a friend that stays with us a just before school starts and I think it would be good for you to make another friend before going into that school.” She said and grabbed my hand. She pulled me towards the center of the place, and I looked at the boys in the room and one other female.  

“Alright these are the twins, Fred and George, Bill and Charlie are not here they are in Russia and Percy is in Romania and Ginny my sweet girl. This is y/n. Please be nice to her.” Mrs. Weasley said and then joined her husband who was still on the phone.  

“Is it true? Are you an American?” Fred and George said.  

“Yes-I am.” I said. This is a lot of people.  

“That’s amazing what are the states like?” They asked.  

“I only really saw the one I lived in. It was gloomy most days. Some were bright and sunny but I didn’t get to enjoy it the way other people did.” I said and looked down towards my feet.  

“Uhm, who is Harry?” I asked.  

I heard the gasp within the room and all the eyes turned to me.  

“American’s haven’t heard of the great Harry Potter. The baby that survived Voldemort? Nothing?” Ron said.  

“No, I am sorry. I honestly haven’t heard anything. Back in my school we didn’t even have a similar situation. Wait did you say as a baby he survived? Did someone try to kill you?” I asked.  

“Yeah Voldemort. Did you even know there were other wizarding schools?” Harry asked.  

“No we were told that we were the only one in the world. It didn’t make a lot of sense to me because no one had even a slight accent but, I guess we all just kind of believed what we were told.” I said.  

“Well, that’s actually a bit refreshing. What were your points like at your school?” Harry asked. 

“Points? What do you mean?” I asked.  

“Like your house points.” Harry added.  

“House points?” I asked.  

“Yeah like for Gryffindor, Slytherin, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff. We are all Gryffindors. Everytime we do something good the house is awarded points. All our tests are mainly physically done and the written ones yes there may be a grade on it per say but, they award the class with the highest grades amongst them all.” Harry said.  

“Oh we don’t have any of that. We are all one entire unit there. We get grades. Mine were mostly C’s so like 70s but no house points. Nothing like that.” I said and they all just looked at me a bit shocked.  

“What kind of school events or sports do you have?” Ginny asked.  

“I mean the normal school dances but, that is really it. We had football, baseball, and soccer. Is that not what you have here?” I asked.  

“No we have Quidditch.” Ron said.  

“Oh and what is that?” I asked.  

“Wait is it a wizarding school then? I mean it sounds really boring at your school. Did you live there at least?” The twins questioned.  

“Yes we lived there.” I said 

“They fed you didn’t they?” I looked down again.  

“No, our families had to give us money or we had to get jobs in order to buy our own food. Very rarely did they provide anything.” I said.  

“What about the nurse?” Ginny asked.  

“They would give us Band-Aids but anything else we would have to go to the hospital. No one wanted to go there because then it would cause us to receive a bill and it could have been a couple hundred of dollars to a couple grand. No one has the ability to pay for that on minimum wage.” I said.  

“They bill you for getting sick? What about a broken arm? Well I suppose you already answered that. Fascinating. Everyone says the United States is amazing but, it does not sound like it really is.” Ron said.  

“Well, yeah. It really is not that great.” I said and smiled towards them.  

“Well that’s alright. Why don’t we go out and get you some books. You will need them for classes surely.” Harry said.  

“I don’t even know if Mrs Weasley-” I started to say but then she and Mr. Weasley walked in.  

“Dear you will be starting tomorrow with them. They made some room. I will have to warn you though. The dormitory was filled in every house, so they decided to put you in a private room. They will show it to you when you get there.” Mrs. Weasley said.  

“Oh and dear, they are looking forward to meeting you. They are pleased to have someone from a different country here. They are very welcoming there.” She said and Ron scoffed.  

“Oh hush Ron. Don’t worry the poor thing. Take her to get some books from the second hand stores. Here I will give you some money.” Mrs. Weasley said. I didn’t want to accept it but, Ron was quick to get up and take it from his mother.  

“Thanks mom we will be back soon.” Ron said and the lot of us walked out of the place we were staying in. 

“So Ron is this your house that we are currently in?” I asked and he shook his head no.  

“No we don’t live there. This is just where we stay when it is this close to school starting. The train station is just around the corner from here.” Ron said and smiled.  

“You take a train to school?” I asked.  

“Oh this will be fun. If anything, I hope we can get you through the platform without any accidents like harry and I had a while ago.” Ron said. That sounds horrifying.  

“I don’t suppose you can tell me what you mean.” I said.  

“You don’t want to know. It will be easier just to show you.” Harry said and smiled at me. He had a handsome face but the scar on his head was a bit strange.  

“How old are you?” Ron asked.  

“I am eighteen. I just turned a few days ago.” I said.  

“Oh. Okay you are a bit older. Are you supposed to be in your last year?” They asked.  

“Yes, this was my fourth and final year.” I said.  

“Wait, only four years? We are here for six. What age did they start you?” They asked.  

“I was fourteen when I started.” I said and smiled. 

“Well you were about the same age as us so thats a bit intense. How can they teach you as much as you need to know in such a short time?” Harry said.  

“I would say we probably are not learning the same things.” I said.  

“That is probably true.” The twins said. The boys linked their arms through mine and then in a blink of an eye we were standing in a store.  

“What just happened?” I held my head. That hurts.  

“Oh, have you not learned how to apparate?” The twins asked? 

“No. I missed that day and they always said it takes a special kind of magic they didn’t want to teach.” I said rubbing my head.  

“Well then I sure hope you are able to keep up with our school.” He said.  

“Professor Snape is going to hate you.” Ron chuckled.  

“He hates everyone so don’t take it personally.” He added.  

“Why does he hate everyone?” I asked.  

“He just does. He lets off that he is annoyed with everyone. Except himself that is. Just keep your head down in his class and try not to mess up.” Ron said.  

We made our way through multiple stores with the boys gathering the books I needed. How many classes were there? There was a lot of books they were grabbing.  

“Let’s go to the wand store.” Harry said. The what? We had to make our wands. What is wrong with mine? 

“What is wrong with my wand?” I asked.  

“It looks a bit crafted. You will need something that will be able to handle any spell that could be thrown at you.” Harry said.  

“But we aren’t allowed to use magic on anyone.” I said fairly confused.  

“Wow, the ways of the americans are truly different.” Ron said.  

“Don’t say that in potions class.” Ron said. I loved potions class back home. I wonder how far they have gotten.  

“Just pick a wand or let the wand decide if it also wants to pick you.” Harry said.  

“I will say something seems very loud and trying to draw my attention towards the back wall.” I said.  

“What do you mean?” Harry asked. I shushed him and then looked at the man behind the desk.  

“Why miss you look fairly familiar. Have you been here before?” The man asked.  

“No, I am not from this country.” I said. I smiled at him.  

“Ah but of course. An american. What a nice surprise. What can I do for you today?” He said.  

“I feel like the wand I want is in the back but, it is behind your desk. It’s practically screaming at me.” I said and he looked me in the eyes.  

“Can you show me this one.” I said and snapped my fingers and the box pulled out a little bit. 

“Yes of course. However, I can’t give this one to you. It wouldn’t be in your best interest miss.” He said.  

“Alright. At least let me see it.” I said. He pulled the box down and opened it. Inside lie a wooden wand that was carved into with leaves imprinted into it. Gold flakes throughout the wand and a green emerald at the bottom. Except it was missing something. Like a key. Funny enough I stole something from my aunt. It belonged to my mother. I picked up the wand and immediately the man looked upset. 

“Miss I don’t think you should touch it.” He said.  

“Oh I just want to see something.” I said and looked at him. I pulled my ring off and in the bottom a little green emerald was on tucked on the underside of it. I pulled it out and lined it up with the chipped piece. It fit perfectly and with it tucked into place the wand was attached to my hand. I looked at the person behind the counter and he looked at me with his mouth gaped open.  

“Miss where did you find the chipped piece?” He asked.  

“It was my mothers. I don’t even know who she is but,  I took it from my aunt who tried to keep it from me. How do you have her wand?” I asked.  

“The wand appeared out of thin air one day. It was always beautiful to me but, you are the only one who has ever asked to see it. How strange. Are you sure it was your mothers?” He asked. 

“Yes, I just don’t understand as to why it would be here and not in the united states.” I said and he nodded.  

“Wow, that is crazy. Anyway what is the total?” Ron asked.  

“Well, this is rightfully hers. If it were her mother’s I can’t make her pay for it. Take it miss. I mean it. Please take what is rightfully yours.” He insisted.  

“Well, thank you sir. I greatly appreciate your generosity.” I said and his face paled.  

“Thank you miss. Just be careful.” He said turning away from us.  

“One more store. Then we should get back to the house.” Ron said. They walked me over to the broom store.  

“Wait. I don’t think I can go in there.” I said.  

“Why not?” Ron asked.  

“It’s just something in my gut is telling me not to.” I said.  

“Oh you will be fine come on now.” Ron said and smiled. He grabbed onto my arm and pulled me into the building. I felt a weirdness in my stomach but right away something came flying towards me. What the hell.  

“Miss are you alright?” Someone asked.  

“Yes, but it is strange that this flew at me like that.” I said.  

“Well maybe it wanted you. Sometimes that happens. It’s not often. Rather it is rare that it happens with brooms. Maybe that one wants you.” He said again. I looked at the price and thought it was a bit much. I mean it looked like it was not worth that much.  

“You can haggle with me if you would like dear.” He said.  

“You don’t want that one. That one is a bit wild.” Ron and Harry said.  

“Oh hush boys. Let the lady decide what she wants.” The man said.  

“No, just hold on a moment.” I said. I looked at the broom fairly carefully. It has the same carvings as the wand.  

“Look the carvings are the same.” I said and the boys looked at the wand and the broom.  

“Wow. Maybe this was also her mothers.” Ron whispered. Again this is weird that her stuff is here and not over there. I don’t know anything about my mother or father. Maybe she was originally from here. It would return to where she was born I think. I am not too sure though. I mean come on why else would it be here. There is no way it would be here unless she was from here. It wouldn’t matter where or how she died it would return to where it came from.  

“Are you alright?” Ron asked.  

“Yes I am alright. Just curious is all. Sir how did you get the broom?” I asked.  

“It kind of just came to me one day. I don’t remember to much because it hit me in the head.” He said and looked down.  

“Look I would be willing to take twenty quid for it.” He said. That is a major discount from the ticketed price.  

“Okay that is fine.” I said. I went to grab what money I had of my own in my pocket but it wasn’t quid.  

“Do you take any other form of money?” I asked.  

“What do you have?” He asked.  

“I have dollar bills.” I said and pulled out my wallet and showed him. They weren’t just any dollar either. They were one of a kind misprints. Surely here they would still mean something.  

“No dear. Those just aren’t any dollars. One is more than enough.” He said his eyes appearing bigger. Okay so I was right they did mean something here as well.  

“What is with the money you have?” Ron asked. 

“Ron look at it.” Harry said and that’s when I noticed it myself. The people on it were moving. How strange. They didn’t do that back home.  

“That’s weird they were just misprints back home. They didn’t move but, now they are moving.” I said.  

“Incredible. We should show my dad. Maybe he has more information on it.” Ron said.  

“Okay I suppose.” I said.  

“Maybe he could find out who your mother is.” He offered. That would be nice. I smiled a bit at the words.  

“That would be nice.” I said.  

Ron and Harry grabbed onto my arms and then apparated us back to the place we were staying. Again that hurt my head more than it should have.  

“Someone here should know something about her if her stuff is here.” Harry said. We all walked into the house and within the corridor Mr. And Mrs. Weasley came out.  

“It’s true. You have her stuff.” She said and held her hand to cover her mouth.  

“Wait you know who my mother is?” I asked.  

“Your mother?” She asked and tears sprang to her eyes.  

“Oh darling. I knew you had a familiarity to you.” She said and walked towards me. Her hand now cupping my face.  

“I am confused.” I said and she nodded. 

“So am I sweetheart. How did you end up in the United States?” She asked.  

“I was born there what do you mean?” I asked.  

“No sweetheart. Your mother well, she had you here just before.” She stopped and started to cry a little. Mr. Weasley held onto her.  

“Y/N, your mother and her were very close. Something happened to your mother just after you were born. We only saw a glimpse of you just after you were born before you disappeared. We could never find you. We are your godparents. We were supposed to take you in and then after a couple years of searching and being unable to find you well it became obvious that something unfortunate could have happened to you. Anyway your mother well she was kind hearted. She didn’t want to tell anyone where you or your father went and paid a price for it. She died ages ago. We saw her wand and broom in the shops and well we tried to get them but, when things dont want you then they make it obvious. Anywho her name was Vergho. Funny enough I am pretty sure you were born in the early days of September making you a Virgo.” He said and looked down. Mrs. Weasleys hands dropped from my face and pulled me into a tight embrace.  

“Mrs. Weasley, surely she would have understood why no one found me. Maybe she had a good reason to keep me hidden. Is she really dead?” I asked.  

“Yes, I am sorry. We can't tell you just how happy we are that you are here. Maybe it was not a mistake you ending up here.” Mrs. Weasley said. Yet I know and I am assuming she knows that this was mearly a coincidence. There was no other way I was going to end up here unless I meant it. The only coincidence was the name of the place sounding fairly similar. I mean there couldn’t be. I don’t believe in “signs” of any kind.  

“Oh dear. Don’t let anyone see your wand if you can avoid it.” Mrs. Weasley said.  

“May I ask why?” I asked quietly.  

“Your mother’s stuff was known by a lot of the professors. I don’t want any of them to get the wrong idea of you. Your mom was kind of a one of a kind deal. Wait Arthur do you think she is like her mother to?” Mrs. Weasleys eyes shot up and looked at him.  

“We will have to wait and see darling.” Mr. Weasley said. He looked at me with kind eyes.  

“What exactly are you referring to?” I asked and they looked at one another.  

“We can’t tell you. That is something you will have to find out on your own. If anyone were to tell you it could be problamatic dear. I am sorry.” She said.  

“I think this has been a long day for all of us. I think you all should go to bed. We will have quite the day tomorrow getting you to the train.” Mr. Weasley said.  

“Wait I thought we had a couple of days left.” Ron said.  

“Ron you always have the days wrong. The load of you go back tomorrow.” Mr. Weasley said. They were truly very kind. Harry motioned for me to follow them and they showed me to another cot in the loft area. No real rooms. That was until Mr. Weasley waved his wand and it became very spacious separating me and Ginny away from the boys. Oh good. Honestly I haven’t had a roommate that was nice before so this was pleasant.  

“Goodnight y/n.” Ginny said and smiled at me.  

“Goodnight Ginny.” I said and smiled back.  

#fanfic #fluff #pov #age difference #severus snape #lucius malfoy #reader #readerxseverussnape #readerxprofessor #multiplepovs #y/n #y/nx #y/n x character #y/n x professor snape #y/n x severus snape #y/n x lucius malfoy #18 #18+ only #18+ content #smut #stroyline #watt #wattpad #ao3 #ao3 fanfic #archive of our own #songs #playlist #Youtube

[storytimewriting]

Wasted Potential

Here's a fun little story time for tonight! This one actually connects to another piece I wrote, Weight of the Universe, but it can be read on it's own as a stand-alone piece. If you do like this one, give the other one a read too!

This short story is vaguely inspired by a good friend of mine. I know she struggled a bit in the past, but she's doing fantastic now, and I absolutely adore that for her.

When people are young, emotions can be overwhelming. Asking for help can feel so far out of reach, it's almost easier to struggle in silence. I know a lot of people have dealt with this, and I hope you know it is so important to ask for help. No one is truly alone.

This is quite a sad piece that alludes to some dark undertones, so be cautious in your reading. (Specifically, if you have struggled with self-harm, please take caution in your reading.)

Also, this piece, as well as others, are posted first on my Patreon! Subscribers to my Patreon are given first access to all my writing, as well as special access to exclusive pieces! Here's the link:

I appreciate you supporting my writing journey.

I hope you like this piece! Let me know what you think.

If you do like it, here's the link to it's sister story:

Weight of the Universe

(word count: about 3.1k)

Enjoy :)

xx gwen <3

________

Wasted Potential

Even the sun falls daily. I think we get so used to the light the sun brings to us that we forget she’s surrounded by darkness. It’s not a bad thing- to be surrounded by darkness. The contrast of light and dark often creates the most beautiful images. Sunshine to shadow, the moon against the night sky- their balance brings peace to these moments. Without a bit of darkness, surely the sun would burn out.

I found my balance when I was young. I had always been good at making friends. That’s why I wasn’t nervous about moving to a new town as a kid. I was used to people liking me: parents, teachers, friends. When I walked through the door and saw a girl who looked like she wanted nothing to do with me, I knew I had to befriend her.

It didn’t take long for us to grow close. We worked well together: when I was loud she was quiet, when I talked she listened, when I laughed she laughed with me.

She spent hours at my house every day. I always preferred my home when she was there. My house was usually way too quiet, and she helped fill it with noise. She brought laughter and conversation, and when she left, the house reverted back to the silence.

Lilith always told me she had to be home before the street lights turned on. One time, we lost track of time when we were playing and she ended up leaving after dark. When I saw her the next day, she looked hurt and defeated. I remember thinking her house was haunted as a child. It made sense to me: the monsters came out after dark. After that, I never let her stay late at my house again.

It wasn’t until I got a bit older that I realized what was actually happening to Lilith. It was never something she told me herself. I think she thought she could hide it, but I always noticed the marks she tried so hard to cover. Her eyes didn’t seem to shine the same after particularly rough nights. I always tried to get her to talk to me- to let me help her- but she refused. I never wanted to be another reason she was upset, so I would let it go. I just did my best to make her happy when she was away from the hurt.

I was used to everything coming easy to me: getting good grades, making friends, fitting in. It wasn’t until I got older that I had to start trying a bit harder. I remember coming home, proud of myself for getting an A on a test, and my parents would ask me what part I didn’t understand. If I wasn’t getting 100%, there was obviously something I wasn’t understanding. Technically, it was true. If I wasn’t perfect, there was always something I could be doing better.

I wanted to impress my parents. I wanted them to be proud of me. I was sure to get A’s in all my classes, befriend everyone around me, and be the best at everything I did. I never had a casual hobby; if I did something, I did it well. However, my parents were so busy with their successes and endeavors, it was hard to be impressed by a child’s.

Lilith was always impressed with me. She was my favorite person to be around because she made me feel important. She was smart and strong and beautiful in a way I never was. She understood the parts of life most people were afraid to. She captured the beauty and serenity of the darkness, like the comfort of a rainy day. She always seemed to persevere no matter the intensity of the storm. I wished so deeply I had even a fraction of her resilience.

I wish I could express the adoration I held for her. Though, she never seemed to like compliments very much. Actually, she never cared to hear what anyone had to say of her. She was confident- sure of herself in a way I longed to be. Her sense of self was not built from the perception others held of her.

Boys started to show me attention when I got older. It was around the same time Lilith started to pull away from me. I tried to fight her on it. I would follow her around, talk to her more, ask her questions about things I knew she liked to talk about. I should’ve taken the hint that she no longer wanted to be around me. Instead, I made her spell it out for me.

“Stop following me, Aurora. I told you I just want to be left alone.”

“I don’t understand what I did,” I whined. I wasn’t used to people not liking me, especially my best friend.

“You’re just you,” she waved her arms at me. “You get everything you want and you never even have to try. You’re perfect,” she spat the word at me like poison on her tongue. “The universe revolves around you like you’re the fucking sun. But I’m done getting burnt. I’m done.”

I listened to her that time. I left her alone. 

I always feared failing to live up to the expectations people held for me. Perfection was everything I’d always strived for. I’d never heard the word spoken with such disdain before. The pedestal I had placed the idea on collapsed, and I was lost.

My house was particularly quiet that day I came home from school. It wasn’t like there was ever anyone waiting to greet me when I walked through the front door, but there was usually someone walking through with me.

I had friends beside Lilith, but none of them felt as deep or as real to me. I spent the first few days following our fight by myself. I would see her sitting alone in the shadows, and I wanted to talk to her. I wanted to convince her that she was wrong about me- I wasn’t perfect, no matter how hard I tried to pretend. I wanted to tell her everything I wanted that was always too far out of reach. I wanted her to know I never meant to hurt her or disappoint her. But she never even glanced my way, and the words never left my lips.

The words echoed in my head: from her, my parents, myself. It was silent in my house but the noise inside my head was deafening. I burned everyone I touched no matter how hard I tried to protect them. I disappointed everyone. It never mattered what I did or how well I did it, I was destined to fail. I felt hopeless. Thoughts of perfection and imperfection had been shattered, and there was nothing left for me to hold onto besides the broken pieces. I held on so tight the shards tore my skin. Crimson dripped from my fingertips to the bathroom tile, staining the white floor red.

It was peaceful at first. There was a sense of satisfaction in ruining my once untouched and perfect skin. It felt like defiance. I was tearing away from the expectations that surrounded me by tearing myself from my own skin. It felt like a way to escape myself.

The pattern repeated for the next few days, but it didn’t take long for the satisfaction to end. The noise was still loud in my head. The marks that lingered on my skin only served as a reminder of all the broken pieces I couldn’t put back together. I held so much regret, embarrassed of the skin I was trapped in.

Long sleeves covered my body when I went to school. It only took a few days for my other friends to start hanging around me again. I let them. I was so alone in every other aspect of my life, I didn’t want to be alone at school, too. I painted on fake smiles and laughs, and I wondered if anyone could tell. No one seemed to question it. People will believe what they want.

I still searched for Lilith in the crowd, but I could tell she wanted nothing to do with me. The person who knew me better than anyone else was now a complete stranger to me. Every day she refused to meet my eyes hurt worse than the last. I forced myself to stop looking for her. As much as I wanted to join her in the shade, I forced myself to endure the heat of the sun without her.

Every day I got home, I tried to distract myself. I tried to talk to my parents but they were always too busy to listen. I tried to listen to music, to write- I tried everything to block out the silence of the world around me and the noise inside my head but nothing seemed to work. I think my brain was broken. The voices in my head screamed at me, begging to be released, and there was only one way I knew how to release them.

The high of the release was always short-lived. Relief was quickly replaced with shame. My hands would shake and my legs were too weak to stand on, so I would stay sitting on the bathroom floor in a pool of crimson tinted tears. I cursed the universe for cursing me, but there was no one I could truly blame but myself. Expectations may have been placed on me by others, but I was the one desperate to uphold them. So obsessed with everything I could have possibly been, I turned into nothing more than wasted potential.

Weeks seemed to blend together in my head. I spent day after day longing for the person I used to be, but I wasn’t even sure who I was anymore. My grades were slowly dropping. I found it difficult to care about being perfect now that I knew it was never going to be achievable for me. Some of my teachers questioned the change, but I know they didn’t really care. They just missed when I was the perfect student they never needed to worry about.

The sun felt more brutal than ever. It beat down on the world, hard and unforgiving. It felt like being scorched as soon as you left the serenity of the shade. I imagine this is how it felt to be friends with me: unbearable heat.

Unknowingly, I pulled up the bottom on my sleeves to try to find relief from the heat. Covering my body had become second-nature, I didn’t realize I was exposing how broken I had been recently. Immediately, my teacher noticed, sending me to the office without hesitation. She refused to hear any explanation I could come up with. Instead, I was met with lectures and threats of being sent away. They told me I could be sent to a facility where I would get help, but I refused to be trapped in a place where I couldn’t escape the silence.

I begged and pleaded, but no one would hear me out. Voices spoke over my own, discussing everything they thought I needed. They told me they were going to have to call my parents. My greatest secret and shame was being thrown about the room as though it were something to publicize. It felt as though they had put up a billboard of my face with the word “failure” painted across it. I knew I was nothing but wasted potential, but it was devastating watching the world around me realize the truth I tried so hard to keep hidden.

I got home before my parents got the call. I knew I needed to leave before they found out the failure I had become. They would be even more disappointed in me than they already were, and I couldn’t handle any more shame.

I packed a bag quickly and left my house. I didn’t know what to do or where to go. I found myself waiting outside Lilith’s window as the sun went down, but I couldn’t bring myself to knock. She had grown tired of me long ago, and it wasn’t fair for me to rely on her to stop the burning. Especially when she always got burnt in the process.

It was easy to see I had no place in this town. With the sun no longer in the sky, I felt like I could finally breathe. I needed to go to a place where no one knew me; a place where there were no expectations for me to fail to reach; a place where no one knew of the pain I was destined to cause.

When I finally made it to the bus stop, a figure sat alone in the dark.

“Lilith?” It was the first time I had spoken to her in weeks. “What are you doing here?” I hoped she couldn’t hear how broken I had become in my voice.

I could see the tear streaks on her cheeks. It wasn’t something I was used to seeing. She was always so strong, even when she was beaten down. Tentatively, I moved closer. Her mouth opened, but only a sob escaped her. My arms were shaking when I wrapped them around her, fearful of being faced with her rejection again. She let me hold her, leaning her body closer to mine.

When she spoke, only words of desperation left her lips. She sounded broken, convinced the only way she was going to live was if she left her current life. I knew what she was speaking of. I knew the ghosts that haunted her in the night. I knew what it was to feel alone. I knew exactly how she felt because I felt the same.

I wanted to burn the world down to allow us both a fresh start, but I knew it wasn’t possible. Instead, I let myself be there for her. I comforted her with all the words I wanted said to me. I listened in the way I always wished someone would hear me. I held her in the way I was desperate to be held. I took care of her in the way I wanted someone to care for me. I hoped she felt less alone.

Neither one of us ever got on that bus. Instead, I walked her home and promised her a safe haven in mine. Before I could walk away, she grabbed my wrist over my sleeve.

“I’m sorry, Aurora- about what I said that day. I didn’t mean it.” She didn’t let go of my wrist. I tried not to show discomfort. Instead, I gave a soft smile, biting the inside of my cheek to keep from crying. “I mean, I do think you’re perfect, but you never hurt me.”

“I’m not perfect, Lilith,” I tried to laugh it off, but the sound that escaped me was sad.

She frowned. “Of course you are,” she argued. “You’re smart and beautiful and-“

“I’m not perfect!” I shouted. I was angry and I couldn’t hide it anymore.

Her eyes widened in surprise. She had never seen me angry before- not enough to yell. I would never even argue with anyone, and now I was yelling at my best friend. Her grip on my wrist loosened, but when I went to pull away, she grabbed me with her other hand. I didn’t even know why I was fighting with her. I was just so upset and so tired of hearing that tainted word. In the midst of the chaos, her fingers slipped under my sleeve and we both froze.

“Aurora,” she looked at me so sadly. I could see a million thoughts racing through her head at once. I tried to rack my brain for an excuse but there was nothing I could come up with. “Why?” Her voice cracked.

“I didn’t mean to,” I cried. I was supposed to be the strong one this time, but now she knew that I was broken too. “I just wanted relief. I just needed a second to breathe. I’ve never felt so lost before and now I don’t know what to do.” I knew I was rambling, but I couldn’t stop myself. She cracked the dam I hid behind, and now everything was flooding out. The feelings of loneliness, helplessness, being lost and confused, not knowing what to do- everything came pouring out. 

It was her who held me this time. “I think you need help, Aurora,” she spoke softly as she held my head. I could feel her tears drip on my skin. I missed her.

I had never known what it was to struggle. I had never needed to ask for help before, and now that I did, I didn’t even know where to start. The words were so unfamiliar on my tongue, I wasn’t sure I knew how to speak them.

Still, it was almost a relief that Lilith knew how broken I was. It was like shattering the last perception the world had of me. I could no longer pretend I was perfect. I could no longer pretend I was okay on my own. There was no one left to convince.

We sat on her front porch until we both had stopped crying. We knew we couldn’t stay there forever. Though, it was nice to feel the moon watching over the two of us again. I made her promise me she would come to my house if anything happened. She made me promise I would tell my parents once I got home. We both knew we wouldn’t break a promise to each other.

I was almost positive my parents already knew. They probably heard the message of my problem as soon as they got home. My shoes scrapped against the concrete as I walked home. I rehearsed my lines again and again, trying to come up with the perfect explanation for my parents. I didn’t want them to be disappointed in me. I was dreading having to walk through the front door.

When I walked through the doorway, my parents were waiting for me. They sat together on the couch, but stood as soon as they saw me. It felt like they had seen me for the first time in years. Devastation was painted on their faces, and I searched my brain for the lines I had been rehearsing the whole way here, but I couldn’t seem to find any. My mouth opened and closed as tears welled up in my eyes, but only three words left my lips.

“I need help.”

#fiction #writing #author #stories #blondie #short stories #poetry #poem #blond girl #girl things #taylor swift #short poem #storytime #story #short story #dark writing #dark stories #sad stories #sad poem #sadgirl #aesthetic #friendship #best friends #hurt/comfort #sad poetry #sad thoughts #sad quotes #original story #bff #angst

[magictavern]

hey hey!! i saw ur post and got devil house, and now im done and i was wondering if u had come across anything similar?? stories in stories and stories about stories type of stuff

hi anon you have unlocked a little door into a part of my brain that loves stuff like this. some of these recs are of varying quality, and i'll probably note that in my description of them, but these are things that have all personally delighted me over the years!!

a great good thing by roderick townley; this is probably an odd place to start, considering that it is firmly a middle grade novel, but it's a book about what happens to characters in the story once the pages have closed, what happens when they no longer have a reader, what happens when they are tired of playing out the roles given to them in a story. i read it when i was a kid and it's ALWAYS stuck with me

fire and hemlock by diana wynne jones; dwj tends to delight in stories with complicated narrative structures, and i'm probably going to rec some other other things from her later down this list, but this is a book about the stories that we tell ourselves and how they end up warping reality. it's a utter delight, especially if you're familliar with the folk songs of tamlin and thomas the rhymer

princess tutu; my first non-book rec, but if you like stories about stories PLEASE watch princess tutu, it's a really fun and poignant story about the way that fairytale narratives have a chokehold over people, and how lives will bend in the service of narrative

the house of leaves by mark z. danielewski; if you want stories in stories in stories, all marked by firmly unreliable narrators, this is probably your go-to book. fair warning that it's dense as HELL and also very 00s at times, but i do think it's a good companion to devil house in terms of thinking about who gets to tell stories and what we end up hiding in the act of storytelling, either accidentally or intentionally. also it's a puzzlebox of a book, which is fun imo

spellcoats by diana wynne jones; i said i would rec more of her and here i am. honestly all you need to know about this book is that it's framed as a transcription of a story that was woven into a coat - a coat that one of the protagonists is weaving throughout the course of the book, and which, by the choices that she makes in that weaving, impacts the course that the story takes

revolutionary girl utena (the anime!!); huge content warnings on utena because it deals a lot with assault and gendered violence, and i would recommend looking up a list of cws since the list of topics that it deals with is quite broad, but utena is an anime about the way that fairytales and stories impart a sort of gendered violence. it does a lot of fun things with fairytales in fairytales, and a kind of maze-like narrative structure? huge fave of mine, always

witches abroad by terry pratchett; has this, one of my all time favorite quotes about stories

Stories don't care who takes part in them. All that matters if that the story gets told, that the story repeats. Or, if you prefer to think of it like this: stories are a parasitical life form, warping lives in the service only of the story itself.

honestly, a lot of pratchett books are a good place to turn if you want to think about the idea of stories as a consumptive thing that dictates how a person lives their life, and i'd be happy to point you towards more of his books in that vein if you want them

deathless by catherynne valente; very much a book in the vein of that above pratchett quote -- all about how stories will warp people in service of fulfilling certain tragedies or narrative tropes, and what the consequences are if those wheels are broken

also, honestly, i'd say read john darnielle's other books if you enjoyed this one! both of them deal with fractured narratives and what it means to share stories (wolf in white van moreso), and while they're less focused on the act of storytelling and the impact of that, i found them compelling reads for looking at those structures

i feel like i should have other things to rec here but this list is already getting super long, and i'm fully drawing a blank now, but i hope these are a fun starting place for you

#also yes i know i tend towards the fantasy #but i think fantasy tends to be preoccupied with storytelling and what it means #especially when folk stories have such set structures that are then elaborated on or told in a million different ways #it's a breeding ground for thinking about echoes and ripples #long post #tysm for this ask btw!!

[lotti-lyric]

Hi! I don't know if you're still doing it, but I saw your post and I wanted to request a romantic matchup! I would probably be at General Studies. (Also, I'm new to tumblr, it's here that I ask, right?)

So, I'm a female (she/her all the way), asexual and sex-repulsed, also minromantic (attracted to male presenting people, even if the person in question is a cis-girl) with preference towards he/him. I'm Brazilian, which means I speak mostly Portuguese, then English, and finally a little bit of Spanish (and I will mix all of them in the same sentence sometimes lol). I'm only 1,48m (4'10"? 4'11"? Idk), and my body could be described as mid-size/very curvy, tho it can all be easily hidden by an oversized shirt and sweatpants (when I'm wearing those clothes, people tend to think I'm 12 :\)

I have light skin (I'm white) that can get easily tanned, as long as I don't stay under the sun too much (I have a mild allergy to sunrays). My hair is very wavy, but there will be days where it'll look like it's straight, and others, curly (I don't even bother guessing anymore, it's always a surprise lol). My eyes and my hair are dark brown, it even looks a little like black. Beauty marks everywhere, as well as body hair.

I'm an Aries and an INFP-T. Very introverted, quiet and shy, I can't socialize very well with people whom I don't know or I'm not close to. I have anxiety and social phobia. Once I'm comfortable enough, I'll be laughing 90% of the time, very sarcastic and it's better if I don't start talking about books or music, cause I won't stop soon. I don't have a friendly face and a lot of people stay away because of it (tho it makes me sad, I also use it to scare people who are mean to me or my friends). I'm very aloof and distant, kinda oblivious, but I do care a lot, just don't like showing it. I'm not into physical contact with friends, but a SO may be an exception.

Because I'm a formally gifted, now burnout, kid, I hate being wrong and I tend to base my worth according to my grades. If I'm not good at the first try, why give a second chance? (Spoiler: I know why). Oh, I also like to dance, write and draw, don't like to dress up nor wearing makeup. Being comfortable is everything! I love colorful things, so cloudy/rainy days make me sad. I'm insomniac and I can't sleep till everyone around fall asleep first.

I know it's a lot, sorry. I hope you don't mind and thank you very much in advance!

charlotte’s interlude 💗- hi!! so so sorry again for the delay!! i hope you’re doing well and enjoy! have a great one! i’m so sorry again :((

warnings; anxiety mention

i match you with…

Hitoshi Shinsou!!

this for you both, it matches the vibe!! ^

def thinks it’s super cool you can speak multiple languages!! he’d learn some to try and understand when you use them all!! 💗

he doesn’t necessarily enjoy socializing either so you both like to keep to yourselves and each other!!

just two introverts chilling together to recharge!! ✨

absolutely adores your laugh!! he’s got a super dry sense of humor and is super sarcastic so you both just play off each other

so many sarcastic comments and cackling in between 💀💀

he’d listen to you rant about books or music all day!! he’s genuinely listening too, taking in everything you say!!

he understands that you don’t like to show how you care, he knows you do and trusts you 100%!!

he supports you and always make sure you know your worth outside academics, that you are a worthwhile person!! he makes sure you value yourself!!

you two are always comfortable!! if you’re forced to dress up for something, screw it, you’ll go casual together!! all for one 💃🏼

all in all, v v supportive we love to see it

#bnha fanfiction #bnha x reader #boku no hero academia #mha fanfic #bnha hcs #bnha x self insert #mha x reader #bnha matchups #bnha headcanons #mha headcanons #mha fanfiction #bnha fanfic #mha hcs #bnha matchup #mha matchups #mha matchup #bnha shinso hitoshi #bnha shinsou #hitoshi shinsou

[inkofamethyst]

October 6, 2022

Had a dream last night that I was diving with my family. There was a lot of anxiety because we were about to swim across a drop off. Like the one in Finding Nemo. I only saw the drop off from a distance, but I never went right up to it or across it. My parents did. My sister and I kept going back to the boat to check that our gear was secure. 

As someone who wants to be an academic, I sometimes wonder if I am the greatest achievement or biggest failure of the School System. People who consider the historical legacy of the industrial revolution often note that the true education aspect of school lies in its indoctrination of students into the ideas of hierarchy, rules, schedules, punishment, and rewards so they can become effective workers in the machine. And I latched on to everything in the school system so strongly that I don’t want to leave. On the other hand, one could argue that I’m far from becoming a cog in any machine that matters. Effectively without use beyond the world of academia. 

It’s so funny how I put due dates for readings on my semester calendar because like,,, if I’m not forced to do some sort of reading quiz (which, honestly, I’m probably in the minority here but I like (fair (as in not-overly-specific) and open-book) reading quizzes!  they’re an easy way to earn a few extra points as a grade buffer, especially if the book has a searchable pdf or if the answers are on quizlet which I would never ever ever ever ever use for this purpose of course i detest academic dishonesty with mostly every fiber of my being and they also serve to get you in the mindset for the upcoming class so you’re already thinking a little about the topics ahead) there’s a 70% chance I’m not even going to crack the book after the first week.  But every week I see my little semester due date calendar will be like “ohoho your devbio prof recommends you read 40 pages before Tuesday” (we’re only tested on in-lecture content) and “heyheyhey you’ve got 50 pages of archaeological theory to muddle through confusedly this week” (we get a summary of the concepts on Tuesday and a (relatively confusing) deep dive on Thursday handed to us and I could probably make my two essays based entirely on my notes and a few cherry-picked quotes) and “wowza 25 pages of popgen due this week” (I can’t control-F the book but the quizzes are fill-in-the-blank where the sentences are taken directly from the text and I can find them with a quick skim) and “lookie here there’s two sets of 50 pages of evobio due for the quizzes this week” (control-F) and “yoooo only 70 pages for ecoanth this week!  lookin pretty light!” (these ones I actually read to sound semi-intelligent in my discussion post but also the readings tend to be relatively approachable with a good skim) and it pains me a little (the absolute tiniest bit) to mark them as completed when I didn’t even give it a shot.  First-week-Nina was so hopeful.  

It’s not even that I don’t like to read because I do.  When I decided to do bioanth I started reading a literal textbook on it.  I don’t mind nonfiction, I just don’t want to do unnecessary supplemental work if I can get all the content I need in lecture.  I haven’t the inclination to work through 300+ nonfiction pages in a week.

Didn’t get a response to the cold email I sent today which sucks because it’s throwing my contact schedule all out of wack again.  Ugh.

Today I’m thankful that I’m all set to TA this winter for the first time!  Not sure if there’ll be 10 or 20 hours of work each week, but it’s still exciting!  Hopefully I’ll also be able to do it for the same class in the Spring.  Also thankful for the A- on my evobio exam.  I really do not want to take that final.

[koohiikori]

Live | Yuuta Okkotsu

Pairing : Okkotsu Yuuta x Reader

Warnings : ANGST, mentions of blood, death, manga spoilers!

Summary : Yuuta wiped out everyone in the colony, but he needs 5 more points. No one else can give him points, and no other sorcerers are left. only you.

//Gosh it's been a hot minute since I've posted. I literally have >20 drafts but only this one is good enough for me. Also, I'm having my finals rn. On the bright side, I've got tickets to see JJK 0 so here's an angsty one for my one and only Okkotsu Yuuta ♡

"No. We're gonna walk out of here, okay?"

Yuuta was fuming. He couldn't think straight. He was so close to the end of his plan.

395 points.

That's the amount of points the two of you have managed to save up.

You've killed strong sorcerers, You've been donated points by some on the brink of their deaths, but here we are, 5 weeks into the game and 3 rules later. All you two needed was 5 more points to make the last rule on the plan. To make it possible for players to walk out of the colony. But the sorcerers in the Sendai colony are ruthless, most of then died with almost a hundred -some even hundreds of- points. Leaving you both in this situation. In need of 5 points, in a colony with only non-sorcerers left.

Well... non-sorcerers, Yuuta, and you.

"Yuuta. Listen to me." You said, one hand holding his wrist in a death grip and the other on his jawline, forcing him to look at you. "There's no other choice." You said, weaker than you'd like. You wiped the tear on his cheek with a soft touch.

Your lips quivered slightly as you tried your best not to let your own tears fall.

"As a sorcerer, I'm not worth much compared to you. But here, I'm worth 5 points. So please, help me finish this. We can save all of them, Yuuta!"

He lifted his free hand, holding your hand and pressing it onto his cheek. He pulled away slightly, only to kiss the palm of your hand softly.

"I'm sorry." He whispered. "But you're worth so much more than 5 non-sorcerers." He continued.

"Hold her for me, Rika." He said aloud, as Rika summoned herself behind you.

Before you could react, he'd turned on his heel, walking towards the pack of non-sorcerers on the edge of the barrier with his hand on the handle of his sword. Some noticed him walking towards them but only stared, some ran off, some chose to back away slowly, but most of them trusted him enough not to even doubt him.

You tried to pull yourself out of Rika's grip, but she was a special grade cursed spirit for a reason. You had no chance against her in a full on fight, but she won't hurt you, so you did what you could.

"Puppet manipulation." You whispered, silently hoping Rika wouldn't hear you and alert Yuuta, but of course she did.

"STRING CONTROL!" you shouted before she could cover your mouth or shriek.

The second those words left your mouth, you pulled your fingers just enough to stop Yuuta. He turned around and looked at you with wide eyes as the realization hits him. You'd marked him when you grabbed his wrist.

Your cursed technique wasn't something he couldn't break out of. You both knew that, and so now it's just a battle of wits and guts.

For Yuuta to have enough cursed energy to break out of your technique, he'd have to dispel Rika. And once he dispels her, you'd fight him to protect the non-sorcerers.

But of course, all Yuuta has to do is just make Rika subdue you again, right? He didn't think you'd be desperate enough to waste your cursed energy on postponing those people's deaths.

"You can go now, Rika." He said, walking towards you.

Before he could cut off the 'strings' controlling him, you pulled on it as hard as you could, pulling both his arms so his katana couldn't touch the strings. He pulled both his arms, trying to fight back. Unbeknownst to him, you'd manipulated his sight with your technique. You've made your way behind him, in line with his arm that was still trying to free itself from your technique.

You saw the glimmering blade in his grip, a pang of sadness and fear made its way to the pit of your stomach. But, you didn't have time to think twice, it was now or never.

"Release."

Yuuta didn't really register what happened until he felt resistence on his katana. He pulled on it, only to feel a warm liquid hitting his lower arm. He turned around to see you standing there, taking little steps back, a hand on your stomach, just under where the heart should be.

"... no... no no. This can't be happening. Not again. Not you too." He mumbled in shock.

You gave him a soft smile, wincing slightly at the feeling of your teared skin rubbing. You didn't want to say anything, afraid your voice would come out weak and in pain.

Your fingers felt cold, and slowly so did your knees. In a matter of seconds, they lost balance and you find yourself kneeling on the ground. The pain has somewhat numbed out, but was quickly replaced by a sense of panic. This is it, you're actually dying.

Yuuta immediately kneeled beside you, pulling you so you'd lie down on his arm and knees. He hovered his hand above the hole in your stomach, to which you responded by taking his hand in yours, rubbing small circles on the back of his hand.

"It's okay, Yuuta."

"No, I can't. Please, let me just... we can talk about it, just please." He said frantically, eyes flickering back and forth, scanning your body. You saw a glimpse of the Yuuta you met a year ago. The meek and timid boy that brought a strong, dark presense along with him. But you never feared him, instead, you envied him.

He had the power you could only dream of. If you had that power, your life would've been easier. And maybe Yaga wouldn't be ashamed to say you were his daughter.

"Even if I wanted it, it's no use. Your katana... fuck- wasn't imbued with cursed energy. Reversed cursed technique won't work." You said between labored breaths.

"God damn it, Y/N. Why?"

"They didn't ask for this. They shouldn't have been involved." You said, referring to the non-sorcerers.

Yuuta tucked a stray hair behind your ear, accidentally smearing your blood on your cheek. And suddenly it felt too real. His body trembled, lips quivered, tears cascading as his mind races to find any other way to save you and put an end to the culling games.

"No no no no no, you're gonna be alright. I'll take you to Shoko, she'd know how to hel-" he cut himself off, eyes stuck on the wound as he realized there was no way to get you out of the colony or to contact Shoko and ask her to enter.

You smiled, staring straight into the sides of his eyes. You've always had trouble with keeping eye contact, but right now, you would give up everything in the world to just look into his eyes.

You pulled his hand and kissed his knuckles, which caused him to snap out of his daze. His eyes met yours, they were glossy and flashing with emotions, but still just as beautiful as ever.

"You can do that for the civilians. Make the rule and finish this mission, okay?" You said with a shaky voice, noticing how your breath felt cold in your mouth.

He couldn't say a word.

Instead, he pulled you into his arms. Burrying his face in your neck, he kept one arm behind your neck and head, the other on your back. It was so sudden, you couldn't help but wince because of the pain. But you tried your best not to discourage him from hugging you.

Because you needed this too.

So you lifted your hand and rubbed his back affectionately, taking in labored breaths as your vision started to blur and fingers freeze.

"Thank you for loving me, Yuuta."

-

A week. A week has passed since that day.

Never has the world seen this much bloodshed in a week.

After the rule was applied, the civilians ran out of the barriers. But, so did the reincarnated sorcerers, cursed spirits, and curse users. They've managed to unseal Gojo, who then immediately wiped off the higher ups and took control. The next step is the 'purging' of reincarnated sorcerers and cursed spirits. Though, if you were still around, you'd be the first to protest. There was no need for this massacre.

But Yuuta did need it. He needed to put the blame on something, anything other than himself. And so the blame falls onto the culling game participants, and of course, Kenjaku.

He killed more within the last week than he did in the games. Did he feel remorse? No. Not at all.

Gojo noticed it. He saw a glimpse of his best friend in Yuuta. Afraid history would repeat itself, he put Yuuta off duty.

"You need time to grieve. Leave the rest to us, Okkotsu."

Yuuta didn't like it. He insisted on participating in more missions, even threatening the Ijichi and Nitta a couple times to tell him where jobs are available. It wasn't until Maki slapped some sense into him -quite literally- that he realized you wouldn't have wanted this.

He then fell into a depressive spiral. He locked himself in his room, which used to feel like home, but now felt like a confinement.

Everything reminded him of you. He couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't even get out of bed some days. He was a shell of the man he used to be.

Twirling his ring in his hand, he wondered how beautiful it would've looked around your ring finger. Why is it that everyone he loves dies? Why did he have to love you? Love is a horrible curse.

Did he perhaps accidentally curse you too? No, he wished he cursed you too. Because maybe, just maybe, you as a cursed spirit that haunts him would better than you not being there at all.

Days passed.

He didn't know why he made his way here when he knew it would only set everything into stone. As if the second he saw your name on the gravestone, you'd actually be dead. Perhaps that's what his subconscious is asking for: closure.

But the second his eyes actually fell onto your grave, he felt so many emotions all at once. Anger, sadness, hopelessness, love, disappointment. It was so overwhelming that he didn't realize how much cursed energy was leaking out of him.

"Okkotsu." Someone said as they tapped his shoulder.

He turned around to see Principal Yaga. He never bonded with the man, but he respected him nonetheless. After all, he is the Principal of Jujutsu high, his mentor's mentor, and your father.

"Principal Yaga." He mumbled out. "Sorry, are you here to, I- you-, I can leave. I- I'll come back later." He stumbled on his words. His tongue slipping on guilt and shame.

Before he could walk past, Yaga held his elbow and pulled him back.

"Let's talk." He started, facing your grave, arms crossed, and feet shoulder width apart.

Yuuta stood still for a second, questioning what the older man had to say to him. Is he going to blame Yuuta for your death? Perhaps. And maybe that's what he deserved. After all, it was his katana that struck you down.

"I wasn't a good father. I wasn't there for her first step, first word, first day of school, first date. I chose not to because I was afraid she'd look up to me and follow in my footsteps only to die on the battlefield." He started.

Yuuta felt his heart drop. If only he'd been quicker, or if he'd persuaded one more sorcerer to give their points before their death, then you would still be here. And principal Yaga's sacrifice wouldn't have been for nothing.

"I'm so-"

"It's not your fault." He cuts. "I know you wouldn't kill her. You loved her." He said, as stoic as ever. Arms still crossed, eyes covered by a pair of shades, and no emotion to be read.

"She was a sentimental person. Most people lose that after a while in this line of work. But not her, she'd lay her life for those she loves." He continued.

Yuuta stood still, lips shut.

"I know-, knew my daughter enough to know that she loved you."

Yuuta could feel his legs trembling.

"Don't say that. Don't speak like she's gone." He said as his hands reached down to your grave.

"Okkotsu." Yaga warned.

The ground on your fresh grave began to split. Yuuta has seen this before, the birth of a cursed spirit.

"Sleep." A familiar voice said, tapping the side of his head.

He blinked and suddenly he was in a very different place. He was back inside the colony, right on the edge of the barrier. He was back in the one place he never wanted to see again.

"You know, I asked you to help me finish the mission, not to bring me back to life afterwards." You said, followed by a short, playful laugh.

He stumbled backwards a few steps, unsure of what he's seeing. Was it an attack? Is he under someone's technique?

"It's me, Yuu." You tried to convince him.

"No, that's not possible. Is this... did I curse you too?"

"No... Well, you almost did."

"This has to be a dream, right?"

"You can say that. Gojo knocked you out, I tried to catch you, and suddenly here we are. I'm just as confused as you are."

"You were there?"

"I never left." You started.

"I tried everything. I tried to stop you from taking missions, I tried stopping you from threatening Nitta and Ijichi, I tried to pull you out of your room, talking to you, lying next to you while you sleep, everything I can think of." You continued as you reminisce on the past week or so.

Yuuta felt his lips quivering as his tears roll down quietly. You started to slowly make your way towards him, the sound of crunching gravel and sand filled the silent air.

"We're never going to see each other again, are we?" He blurted, eyes on your boots.

"Perhaps. I don't know what'll happen after this, but I want you to do one more thing for me, is that okay?" You asked, a hand on his cheek, much like the day you died. His eyes met yours and you tried your best to keep your tears at bay, never letting a single one drop.

"Live. Not just breathe. Make the most out of your life. And don't be afraid to fall in love again." You said as your hand landed on his cheek softly.

He pressed his face onto your hand for a second, before feeling a surge of bravery and desperation flow through. He pulled you in, his free hand landing on your waist as your foreheads touched.

"Maki wouldn't be a bad choice." You half-joked. And he let's out a small laugh. The first one he's let out since... he can't even remember. But he remembered it was with you. Even in the gloomy aura of the culling games, you both found ways to make each other laugh.

"Thank you, Yuuta. You've shown me love. I feel more loved that I have ever been. Tell dad I still love him no matter what. And... I mean it. You have so much love to give, so find someone to stay by your side." You continued, somewhat pained by the fact that it couldn't be you.

"But no one will ever replace you."

With a kiss, you both sealed your fate. He opened his eyes to meet the familiar ceiling of his dorm and your voice still in the air. A curse that you left for him.

"Live."

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk angst #jujutsu kaisen angst #okkotsu angst #okkotsu yuuta x reader #okkotsu yuta #yuuta okkotsu #yuuta okkotsu x reader #yuta okkotsu #okkotsu yuta angst #yuta okkotsu angst #okkotsu yuuta angst #yuuta okkotsu angst #jjk 0 #jjk yuta #jjk yuuta #jjk yuta angst #jjk yuuta angst #jujutsu kaisen 0

[sinfulcries]

ok ok here me out: step dad bokuto that comes to you his stepson to fill out his submissive desires

stupid old man -- bokuto x male reader

author's notes: this is so bad im so sorry. i haven’t been at my best lately but i hope this was still okay. i’ll try to make it up to you guys with my future posts </3

tw. pseudo incest, age gap (reader is 21, bokuto is 40), degradation, rough sex

Bokuto couldn’t pretend anymore! He couldn’t just watch as his son brought home boy after boy, girl after girl fucking them hard all over your bedroom before sending them home limping as if nothing happened.

It was pure torture, Having to hear the rhythmic banging of the headboard against the wall and your one night stands’ pleasured moans. How was Bokuto supposed to hide his erection every time he would hear you talking so lewdly to your partner? It was almost as if you were taunting him, Riling him up till he was begging for you to fuck him just like how you fucked every single person that you’ve brought home.

As you were about to answer one of your calls, The older man stopped you from doing so, His face red and eyes filled with determination. “What do you think you’re doing?” You asked, tone stern as you had no problem in talking so rudely to your step dad.

“I- Uh, Can I talk to you for a moment?” Bokuto murmured, And you could only raise an eyebrow eyeing the slightly shorter male in front of you. “About? If it’s about my grades again I—“

“I want you to fuck me.”

Now the words that came out of his mouth were unexpected. And you couldn’t control yourself from grinning at the flustered man, Your hand landing on his cheek as you inched your face dangerously closer to his. “Repeat that for me?”

Bokuto could barely look at you! He was so undeniably turned on with his step son in front of him, taunting him as if he was talking to someone much younger than him. “Y-You can’t just.. Tease your elders like this...”

“Hah? You may be older than me, But you act like a little boy.” You took his bottom lip in between your teeth, tugging on it and letting it snap back in place before continuing, “I can’t believe my mom married such a slut.”

The man could barely respond as you pinned him against the wall, hastily removing his clothes before planting wet kisses along his neck, marking the tan skin. A lewd moan left Bokuto’s lips, instinctively wrapping his arms around your neck as you lifted him up with ease, Continuing to use his body for your own satisfaction.

So this is what he was missing out on! If Bokuto merely felt this good with your lips alone, he should’ve begged you to fuck him sooner! And with a whimper, He felt his cock twitching pathetically against his stomach— beads of precum dripping down his swollen length.

“Hard already? Just from me kissing you?” You mused teasingly, watching the man blush under your hot gaze. “I barely even started.”

“Y/n p-pleah—se!”

“Please what dad? Beg properly will you?”

“I-I need you to f-fuck me already!”

Seeing your step dad begging to get fucked by your cock wasn’t a sight that you saw often however as you turned him over to see his hole twitching and gaping you couldn’t help but smirk at the sight.

“Shit— You’re even stretched out, D’you play with yourself to the sound of my partner’s moans dad?” Bokuto nodded instantly at your question, wiggling his ass against your hard cock— silently pleading for you to fuck him.

Though you wanted to tease the older man more, Your mom would be home soon and as much as you’d love to see Bokuto humiliated in front of his wife— You’d much rather save that for a much special time.

Slipping your underwear off, you wasted no time in aligning the fat head of your cock in front of his ass— rubbing your shaft teasingly against his hole before pushing in with little resistance.

the soft yelp that left the man’s lips made your cock twitch inside of him, and with one particularly harsh thrust, you buried every inch of your length past the puffy rim of his cunt. “My my, for an old man you have such a tight ass.”

Teasing him never got old especially with the lustful whine that left his lips, cock swollen as you started to fuck him hard against the wall of your living room.

“Y-Y/n—! Oh my god..!” Bokuto moaned, desperately trying to hold himself against the wall as you pounded him mercilessly. Your lips hovered above the shell of his ear, whispering about how much of a filthy slut he was.

And as much as he denied it, shaking his head humiliatingly; The sight of him breaking underneath you proved otherwise.

“You can’t lie to me, baby. Your body’s being awfully honest.” a look of mock hurt replaced the shit eating grin on your face and a loud cry escaped the man’s throat feeling your rough hand playing with his oversensitive cock.

It was a shame that you two were focused on the sinful pleasure that you were both providing each other! Or else, You two would’ve seen the horrified expression on your mom’s face as she stands disgusted by the doorway.

#sinfulcries works #dark content #top male reader #haikyuu x male reader #dark blog #dark haikyuu #x male reader #hq smut #hq male reader smut #dark hq #bokuto x top male reader #bokuto smut #bokuto x male reader #bokuto x reader

[levis-little-nuggie]

hi! i just saw the post about requests and could you write some fluffy sex headcanons with the brothers? we don't really see stuff like that so i thought i'd ask

Bless you nonny for the request 💜💜 this uh, turned out a lot longer than I had anticipated, probably because I haven't written anything in a good while 😅

Asmo and Belphie will have their own posts 💜

Nsft, obviously, so everything is under the Read More. I made the reader as gender neutral and inclusive as I could. Please let me know if at any point, I was exclusive.

Fluffy Sex Headcanons of the Demon Brothers

(minus Asmo and Belphie)

Lucifer

This man will top or bottom solely dependent upon what you want. Sex with him is moreso about pleasing his partner than just getting off. His preferences are fine tuned to your desires and your body’s limits. Lucifer’s sin feeds off of the immense pride a lover feels when they know you and your body better than you do

He may act cold and aloof in public and in front of others, coming off as stoic and arrogant, but it’s a completely different story behind closed doors.

However you want him, he’ll comply. You’ve done the impossible and captured his heart.  Don’t let this old man and his brown shoes fool you, he’ll drown you in passion.

He’ll gladly play the Dom role, but he’ll also gladly be your sub as well.

If you’re into BDSM and prefer him to Dom, you can expect an intensive aftercare routine that would rival Asmo’s. It’s not that he doesn’t like hurting you or pushing you to your limits, he just wants to reward you for being so good for him and wants to remind you how much he loves you.

If you’re into BDSM and prefer to Dom yourself, go crazy! While you would be capable of marking and bruising his skin, you can’t physically hurt or break him beyond light scratches. He can break out of whatever restraints you put him, even if they are demon-grade. You would need actual spells to diminish his strength to put him on par with a lower-class demon if you wanted him to actually feel any real pain, but if it’s what you want, he’ll do it. Expect a conversation beforehand about what you want and how he can do that for you. He wants there to be clear communication so he knows how best to serve you in the moments to come.

Sure the sex is fantastic, but he’ll show you how much he loves you in the tender moments after. The afterglow is his favorite part, both of you basking in the remnants of pleasure coursing through you, the physical numbness, and the swell of feel-good chemicals swirling through your bodies. This is when he’ll hold you closest, pepper your skin with kisses unable to stop himself, he’ll play with your hair if you have it, his eyes will be bright, his smile will be unrestrained. He may even start humming a long-forgotten lullaby or your favorite song as he rests his head against your chest, hearing your heartbeat in blissful content until one of you decides it’s time to get cleaned up.

No matter how long the day has been, the amount of hours he’s put into all that damn paperwork, he’ll always make time to pamper you after sex. If you prefer to shower alone, he’ll let you go first and have the bed ready with new, clean sheets and clean towels set out for you when you’re done. Prefer to sleep with pajamas? He has a drawer dedicated to your favorite things along with some new ones he bought for you.

Mammon

Ah yes, the tsundere. The dumbass in the streets, dumbass in the sheets. The one who has more hair-brained ideas than he does fingers and toes in one week. One of the greatest banes of Lucifer’s existence.

His push and pull personality might have you questioning the validity of his feelings, but I believe that Mammon wouldn’t be partaking in fluffy sex at all unless he was absolutely smitten.

With how his brothers treat him, he’s reluctant to open his heart to you and fully accept that at some point, you won’t start insulting him either. However, equipped with the sin of greed, Mammon’s completely helpless when you compliment and reassure him. 

His standoffish attitude is a front, a feeble attempt to keep up his reputation as “The Great Mammon,” but he’s got himself wrapped around your finger before he even realizes it and that facade would melt away instantly at your smallest of smiles, a kiss on his cheek or back of his hand, a surprise compliment, anything that makes his heart skip a beat. 

Of the brothers, he has one of the weakest composers around you mainly because he’s also one of the horniest. 

Sex with Mammon can be rushed;  a quickie between classes, a broken composure that has him feeling dehydrated for you, a clash of tongues and teech and a burning desire that encompasses both of you until you find release.

However, the sweetest and fluffiest sex with Mammon would be when either of you are feeling emotionally vulnerable. 

He’ll treat you like you’re the greatest treasure to have ever existed in all three realms, with a delicacy as if you’re fragile because he knows he can be careless and reckless. He’ll be in his head a lot making sure he’s taking care of you, that you feel good, doing his damndest to keep you satisfied so there’s no room in your heart to doubt him. He’ll do whatever it takes to keep that sparkle in your eye when you look at him, to never lose you and never have to experience the day you realize his brothers have been right all along. 

And I mean he’ll do whatever and however. Any wish is his command, but you’ll have more work cut out for you if you suggest the both of you participating in a threesome or more. He wants you all to himself, it’s his greed, but it’s your reassurance and validation that will have him like putty in your hand. 

He’s more than okay with both of you falling asleep in your mess, but more often than not, he’ll wait until you’ve dozed off to clean up. In these moments, he takes the time to worship every inch of your skin, like polishing a priceless jewel. His intentions are pure, most of the time, he just likes to wait till you’re asleep so there’s no chance for you to tease him about it. It also allows his greed to soak up your peaceful expression, the way your body reaches out to him after he’s finished cleaning and comes back to curl up next to you. 

There’s a secret photo album hidden on his phone filled with pictures of the both of you like this, your lashes against your cheeks, your freckles or sun spots, any blemishes or scars that he’s covered in kisses countless of times, your hand in his and vice versa, memories of how sweet and tender your love is, filled with emotions he struggles to put into words. 

Leviathan

It all depends how you play your cards with this one. Teasing him is easy and it’ll get him all flustered, but pair that with his raging horniness and you’ll be walking a fine line between a Dom or sub Levi.

However, if it’s fluffy and sweet sex you want, treat him gently and he’ll return the favor. It’ll take a bit of time and effort to get here, on both your parts, but if you’re willing to put in the work, he’ll make it worth it. Like Mammon, this means sex will be its fluffiest when either both of you or one of you is emotionally vulnerable.

We’ve recently been blessed by the devs on a cannon description of his tail, confirming that it is snake-like with scales. This also means, however, that his tail is sensitive to touch and he has full control of its movements. During a more sweet intimacy, he likes to wrap his tail around a limb, your arm or your leg. It’s only when he’s in Dom or sub mode that he likes to use his tail in a more active manner.

It’s important for him, whether he realizes it or not, that during these moments, that he’s the one touching you, not his tail. If you ask him to use his tail too much during sex, he’ll start to think that you’re only with him because of his tail.

He’ll want to see you even though his room is dimly lit. He also knows his tub bed might not be the most comfortable so he’ll invest in a mattress to put on the floor by the tank, and a few fluffy blankets, from the Ruri-chan line of course, to keep you warm and comfortable so you’ll never want to leave his room, just like him.

He prefers any position that has the two of you lying together, with your face in clear view because he can’t get enough of the faces you make because of the pleasure he’s responsible for making you feel. He’ll be more focused on your voice, your body language, your reactions to reassure him he’s doing something right.

To see your naked skin kissed with the reflection of the water from the tank is his favorite part. He actually got a nosebleed the first time he saw you like that. 

Sex with the otaku is a learning experience that requires patience and repetitive reassurance. He’s certain that no one could ever love him, and it’s going to cost a lot of mental energy, and it can be disheartening at times where it seems he’s not made any progress in loving himself at all, but you’ll both also have an opportunity to create something truly beautiful between the two of you. Falling in love with your best friend, and having your feelings returned with all their heart is one of the most beautiful things to ever experience.

Satan

I like to imagine that Satan is akin to that tiger DILF in Zootopia looking at his tablet while on the train, you know, the one who looks like he’ll take good care of you? Listen, during one of his Devilgram stories, the man pitches a tent (like an actual tent, not a boner you guys) and makes both of you cups of hot chocolate. You can pry this hc out of my cold, dead hands.

Sex with Satan is actually more often fluffy and sweet than anyone would assume because he’s the Avatar of Wrath. Just like all the other brothers, Satan is more than his sin. That being said, Satan is still CEO of Angry Sex™ but he’s also more intune to his own feelings than the rest of his brothers. 

It’s after his more violent fits of rage that he’s seeking your comfort. It’s difficult for him to come down from his wrath; the worse the fit is, the more broken and twisted he feels. He didn’t like coming to you at first because he knows how mentally draining it can be for a human to deal with someone like that, but you’ve insisted in your endearing and stubborn way that he can and needs to rely on you more. You threatened to find all the sources proving your point for the success of any relationship and he eventually gave in, accepting your kindness and your love.

In turn, he provides you with an arsenal of reading material and spells you can arm yourself with for a plethora of reasons; mainly self-defense against demons, a history of successful and failed attempts to prank Lucifer, as well as guides for subjects in class to help you study.

Unlike his previous brothers, sex with Satan is more about the pleasure you both feel. Of course he’ll still be mindful of your pleasure, but he can also get lost in his own desire. No matter how far gone he is, you know that the moment you utter the safeword, he’ll stop immediately and assess the situation. The safeword is actually a simple spell that he’d found when you two started getting more intimate.

On days he’s feeling extra playful, he’ll dress up for you; a collar with a bell, cat ears, a butt plug with a tail attached. He loves to be your little kitty cat, and will practically foam at the mouth if you ever dressed up like a slutty cat for him, but this doesn’t lead to fluffy smut times.

While he has no issues with PDA, Satan reserves his more soft and fluffy side for when you two are totally alone. He’s proactive in looking up cute date ideas and is the type to go all out turning his bed or his floor into a nest of pillows and blankets, cups of tea, hot chocolate, coffee, whatever you prefer, a variety of little snacks, and turn his wall into a projection screen to watch old-fashioned black and white romance movies. 

For Satan, it’s the moments leading up to the sweet intimacy filled with love and adoration that are his favorites. Being the reason your face brightens, tears of happiness well in the corner of your eyes, the way your smile makes his heart stutters, Satan loves showing you how much you mean to him mainly because he knows he’s not the best with words. He could recite any poem of strings of song lyrics, but he believes actions speak louder than words.

He actually prefers for you to have control in these moments; there’s less of a chance he could hurt you and it’s another way to prove his love. He’ll only ever bottom for you. He was reluctant at first, but it’s like you opened his eyes to a whole new world he didn’t know about. He still likes to act like he's a cat and you're his mouse, but he also likes it when you take over and make him bow to your whim. You've gained his trust as well as his heart and he believes that the power dynamic in a relationship should be balanced.

During the most intimate moments, either right after sex or waking up together in the morning after sleeping in, you'll both enter this Cat Speak mode. One of you will start, just a cute little "mrow?" and you'll go back and forth entertaining a semblance of a conversation but without saying anything. There's no actual conversation happening, it's just the two of you making cat noises at each other, giggling and riding the high of this special intimacy specially reserved for these moments of bliss.

Beel

Let’s be honest, 9 times out of 10 your sex with the sixth-born will be fluffy and sweet. He’s like the personified version of a golden retriever. He loves you and has the instinct to want to take care of you. You’re such a small, delicate human, and his brothers love you too so when you’re in Beel’s care, he makes sure you’re satisfied more than just sexually. 

Anything you’re willing to give him, he’ll accept wholeheartedly expressing his love and gratitude in the form of huge grins, hugs, a hearty chuckle, and peppering kisses across your face. 

Even though he’s not as sexually active as some of his brothers, once you get this big guy started, be prepared to cancel any plans you have for the rest of the day… and also the day after just to be safe. He has the most energy and will keep going until he’s had you against every solid surface in his room, minus Belphie’s furniture of course. Regardless of your size or how you look, he’ll make you feel weightless as he carries you around the room effortlessly

He loves the way you taste, gliding his tongue over your skin like you’re an ice-cream cone that never melts, he’s actually growled a number of times when you tried pulling yourself away from him. His eyes had turned shades darker than normal before you snapped him out of it. He would apologize profusely and kill the mood so as to make sure he’s in the right headspace and you’re okay. 

This has only happened a few times, but he still loves to taste every inch of you whenever he has you all to himself. He leaves you covered in hickeys and love bites and even though he’ll apologize, you know he feels absolutely no shame in his brother’s reactions to seeing you covered the next day. 

His favorite part is helping you ride out your orgasm with his mouth. He knows he’s more skilled with his mouth anyway and just, the man cannot get enough of you or your taste. Depending on where he’s at when you orgasm, if he’s close, he’ll paint your skin in his release, and then clean up the mess and drag you in for snuggles. If he’s not quite there yet, he’ll assess your energy levels and wait until you’re ready to go again or keep going, depending on who topped or bottomed. He’s all about consent and wants to join you when you’re fully blissed out regardless if he’s finished or not (meaning he’ll deny his own release in order to lie with you).

Aftercare comes almost second nature to him. He’s already carrying you to the bathroom and soaking you off in the shower before you realize it. The warm water and his large hands invade your senses and he urges you to let go, to let him take care of you and it’s like a dream. His calloused hands offer a sort of comforting roughness that keeps you grounded. If you want shower sex, you’ll have to initiate it.

Actually, that’s pretty accurate for Beel. You want sex? You’re either going to have to initiate it or tell him straight out. Poor guy does not take hints well as he is very oblivious.

#like i said #longer than expected 😅 #obey me shall we date #obey me #obey me Lucifer fluff #obey my Mammon fluff #obey me leviathan fluff #obey me Levi fluff #obey me satan fluff #obey me beel fluff #so many tags #obey me nsft #obey me headcanons #obey me fluff

[giorno-plays-piano]

Vicious

Part VI

Pairing: Steve x reader, Bucky x reader, Thor x reader, Loki x reader, Peter x reader

Warnings: yandere, obsession, stalking, possessiveness, theft, mention of blackmail, all characters are adults.

Words: 1567.

Summary: Transferring to Stark Academy that has only allowed to take in female students last semester, you realize you are just one of three young women among hundreds of students. Your things are constantly being stolen, and soon you begin fearing for your safety.

Part I

Part II

Part III

Part IV

Part V

________

You spent the rest of your evening like a somnambulist, barely able to concentrate on your projects before you went to bed, barely finishing half of the things you planned for today. Even the change of locks didn't make you as happy as you thought it would. It felt like something between a dream and a nightmare.

Lying in the dark, you stared at the ceiling, thinking of what happened just a couple of hours ago. Why did he do it? Was it just out of habit and didn’t mean anything? Naturally, with his appearance and easy-going attitude, he probably dated many girls and didn’t think much before kissing someone he liked.

Remembering the way he talked to you in the morning, you thought he must have pretended to be shy around you. Thor certainly wasn’t sheepish.

Was it all a sham? Was Loki right about all of them, playing their roles to get close to you? You couldn’t forget the way Thor looked the moment he told you about being smart. It was like something switched inside him, and for a second you saw the real Thor who was far from being your simple, good-natured athlete.

Why did you keep thinking about that stupid kiss even after seeing the man could be dangerous?

Aroused and angry, you tossed and turned until you fell asleep.

____________

Waking up was especially tough, despite the fact you didn't really do much yesterday, meaning you were going to spend your weekend studying. Shoot, and that's when you planned to visit that new chocolate boutique in the city. Maybe you could still make it if you spent more time studying today?

But then again, going to the city alone might be a bad idea. Even if the guys who stole your things were beaten, it didn't mean it had always been the same people following you. The school was full of weirdos, in the end. What if somebody went after you? Steve would definitely say you had to bring one of your guards with you.

Damn. It was better staying in the dorm then.

"Good morning! Are you ready?" Peter's voice broke through the silence, and you flinched, hurriedly applying some lipstick because you didn't have enough time to put your makeup properly.

Well, at least you were fully dressed.

"Just give me a second!" Picking up your bag, you put your shoes on and opened the door, looking at a young guy who's face was lit up like a Christmas tree. "Hi!"

He definitely liked what he saw, and you felt your cheeks growing hot from embarrassment. From the very start of the semester Peter acted very sweet around you, and you thought you could be friends with him. He wouldn't do something as ugly as blackmailing, would he? Thor said it too. Clearly, Steve was exaggerating.

"Did you sleep well? I've heard you changed your lock, so now it'll be better."

"Ugh, I hope so. But I still sleep with my dresser blocking the door." Sighing, started walking, afraid to look in the faces of other students, hurrying off to school.

They must have been disgusted, watching you being friendly with one guy after being all lovey-dovey with the other just yesterday. Although you didn't see anyone in particular, you were sure somebody saw Thor kissing you. And now you were walking the corridors with Peter.

"By the way, what's your Insta?"

What? Your Instagram? Whatever for? Although you had no idea why he needed it, you let him add you, by the time leaving the dorm and walking towards the main building.

Suddenly, Peter got pretty close, his arm on your waist as he lifted up his phone and hummed, "Look here and smile!"

Before you realized what he was doing, the boy kissed your temple, and you heard the sound of a photo being taken by his front-facing camera. What the Hell?!

"Peter!" Pissed at him, you quickly break free and stepped back, but he was already looking at his phone, editing the photo and posting it almost immediately.

You heard your phone buzz when he marked you on the photo.

"That's a good one. You look very cute here."

"What are you doing?!"

"Making a proof we're dating, of course?"

You were taken aback by the sincerity in his voice, and Peter smiled from ear to ear like an excited teenager, showing you the picture: it wasn't that bad, and you looked as if you were slightly embarrassed by Peter's closeness. Oh, of course. He had to convince his friends he was dating you, but he didn't kiss you on the lips that could make other people too suspicious. Instead, friends of Barnes or, say, Thor, would still think it was all for show, and it was their friend who dated you for real.

Shit, Steve's plan was incredibly complicated, and you didn't like it at all.

"Oh, alright." You mumbled, lowering your eyes to the ground, and Peter laughed.

"We'll make a TikTok dance later. If you wanna make people talk, just use your social media." He winked at you and put the phone in the pocket of his pants, resuming walking, and you moved along, your face still hot.

God, what did these guys got you into? You felt like you were lost in the middle of a play, not even having a script to read what was your role in all this.

Before you parted your ways, going to a different classrooms, Peter talked about videogames, the upcoming Resident Evil - apparently, his favorite franchise - and some Dota tournament, but you didn't know much about it, and Peter offered to show you his favorite games "because you can't spend all your time studying!"

He was as careless and sweet as always, but you couldn't get Steve's words out of your mind. Damn, if only you could know for sure that Peter didn't blackmail anyone. Who could you talk to about it? Obviously, not Peter himself, but every time he spoke you had that nagging feeling you needed to talk to him. You barely kept your mouth shut before he went to a different room.

Ugh, why didn't you transfer anywhere else when you still had a chance? Obviously, now you could only drop out of school, and it definitely wasn't something you were going to do.

Luckily, the next couple of hours you were busy with your classes, trying your best to prepare for the upcoming exams. The academy held high standards, and even though you were a good student, it still took lots of efforts to keep up the good work. How Thor even managed to get enrolled, judging by the fact he hated studying and often skipped classes?

Ah yes, he mentioned something about getting a scholarship from the academy for his success in the sport.

By the lunch time you were drained, listening to Peter chatting with an absent-mindedly epxression on your face. Funny enough, Peter's grades were better than yours, even though he spent much less time studying. What, was he some genius like Loki? You felt a little envy.

"I gotta go take my tracksuit, I have PE next," the boy said, and you nodded, throwing away the leftovers of your lunch.

As you stood close while he grabbed his sportclothes, you heard two guys talking behind the lockers to your right.

"Have you seen her today? She's with Parker!"

You tensed immediately. Of course, they were talking about you.

"Yeah, so what?"

"She was with Thor yesterday!"

Watching you froze on the spot, Peter stilled too, listening carefully. Oh shit, you hoped no one cared about who you went with - why should they, in the end - but, apparently, you were drawing too much attention simply because you were a girl among hundreds of male students.

"So what?" The other guy asked impatiently, growing tired of this conversation.

"Are you stupid? She's going out with them! I bet she's looking for a guy." The first student said with excitement, and you cringed. No, you weren't going out with anyone, you wanted to stop the weirdos from following you and steeling your things. Was it too much to ask?

"Yeah, who cares?"

"We have three fucking girls in the whole school, and you don't care if one of them could be going out with you? Besides, this one's pretty. I'd fuck her!"

You felt like you were going to puke any moment. Why on Earth did you decide to transfer to an all-boys school? It was like the whole school were a men’s room filled with stupid-ass guys, and you were locked inside, forced to listen them talk junk.

"You'd fuck a sheep, weirdo. Go get yourself a girlfriend if you can’t stop thinking with your dick.”

Laughing, the guy left, and his friend followed him, shouting something stupid while you breathed out a sigh of relief. Of course, you knew there would be some talk, but you didn’t expect it to be so... gross. Were you really gonna spend the two remaining years here?

Watching you getting frustrated, Peter gently touched you by the arm and said softly, “Don’t worry. They won’t talk rubbish about you.”

“What do you mean?” Suddenly thinking of Steve’s words, you blurted out exactly what you were thinking of the whole day, “Are you going to blackmail them with something?”

“I... what?”

Part VII

__________

Tags: @finleyjayne @alexakeyloveloki   ​@helenaeisenhower @villanellevi @hurricanerin ​@inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @navegandoaciegas @rosalynshields @brattycherub @sllooney @angrythingstarlight @lookiamtrying @buckysbunny @stargazingfangirl18 @dillybuggg @literate-lamb @cosicas-cuquis @sarge-barnes-sir @buckybarnesplumwhore @jaysayey @megzdoodle @gotnofucks @lux-ravenwolf @ximebebx @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @sourpatchspinster @biiskuitx @stupendouslovegardener @iheartsebandchris @lovelydarkdaydream @soleil-dor @illyrianprincess @vampirestrawberries @goodgodimaweirdperson @frontmanash @freya-heya @yandematic @mariatietacapitu @d3monslust @maybesandohnos @ibeatuptwinks @mangobangi

#bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader #thor x reader #loki x reader #peter parker x reader #dark steve rogers #dark bucky barnes #dark loki #dark peter parker #dark thor #yandere

[thedaredevilsgirl]

Dear Teacher - Part 2

warnings: teacher and student relationship (The reader is between 19 and 25 years old and please don't get involved with your teachers) angst,fluff, smut (fingering, unprotected sex -Please use a condom- dirty talk)

Word count: 3342 (surely the most I have ever written)

N/A: Hey, many people were asking, so I brought you part two of dear teacher, I hope you like it.I am creating a taglist, message me if you want to be added 💖💖

Part 1

When Tom woke up on Saturday morning he was disappointed to realize that you were no longer there, for a moment he thought that maybe it had all been a dream or just his imagination playing with him, but something inside him knew that no, that the incident had really happened.

"Incident" was how Tom was referring to the whole of Friday night. It had been a bad idea, he knew, meeting you at that bar, inviting you to sit with him, kissing you, taking you to his apartment, and everything that happened after that. He knew it was wrong, but he couldn't help it.

MONDAY:

 Tom was nervous. It was the first time he had seen her since Friday and he still didn't know how to handle it.

You walked into the auditorium that morning and it seemed that fate loved to play with you as the two of your gazes met almost instantly, he swallows dryly and you blush before quickly looking away and running to your seat at the back of the room.

 "Good morning everyone" He says starting his class, everyone in the room answers him quickly.

 "Good morning Mr. Holland" Cindy, one of your students, says cheerfully "Looks like you had a great weekend" she points to a small purple spot on your neck, all the students start laughing as soon as she notices it. You sink into your chair, wanting to hide, mortified with embarrassment, remembering very well that you made that mark on Tom who was blushing in front of everyone's eyes.

"Anyway" he huffs loudly taking the students' attention back to class "I've corrected your Brontë sisters' papers, I'm happy to say that we got very good grades, but only one got a top grade, I'll give it back to you Wednesday" he says before continuing his lesson. 

•─────✧─────•─────✧─────•

The class passes slowly, like torture for both of them, they just wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible. They needed to talk about what they had done, but they were more than happy not to do that today.

"That's all for today, remember to turn in your next paper on Monday and get ready for the debate next month, see you all on Wednesday" he says to everyone as his class ends. Slowly the room starts to empty, but you can't get out as a hand grabs your wrist making you turn to see who it was.

"Y/N" Mike, the boy who had missed your date on Friday was standing there holding your hand "I just wanted to apologize again for not coming on Friday, I didn't mean to ruin your weekend kitten" he apologizes.

"It's okay, really, you didn't ruin my weekend" you answer politely.

"If you want" he says getting closer to you "We can reschedule, I promise I won't cancel this time" he gives you a conquering smile.

Tom settles back in his chair, moving his hands nervously across his lap. He didn't want to hear your conversation, but as soon as he heard no names being called he started to pay attention, he had no right to be jealous, you weren't his girl, but he hoped you wouldn't accept it, you deserved much better than that boy in front of you.

"Mike, I'm sorry, but I can't accept it" You say, trying to be polite and pulling away from him a little.

"Just a date kitten" Tom rolls his eyes from where he was sitting, did he not understand what no was?

"We better just be friends" you dismiss yourself before leaving the room.

"Girls" the idiot says before leaving the room.

TUESDAY:

Thomas only saw you once that day, talking to your friends in the hallways.

He felt your gaze on him, which made his heart beat faster, and when he returned your gaze you looked away, blushing at having been caught in the act.

As he lay in his bed that night, the memories came back, he was beginning to hate it. Avoidance and being avoided, the two of them should talk about what happened instead of pretending not to and acting like children.

WEDNESDAY:

You were pacing back and forth in the hallway, debating with yourself, trying to decide whether or not to go into that office.

This morning, as Tom walked around the room handing out corrected papers to his students, he left his paper on your desk whispering a congratulations before moving on to the next student. You saw the top grade written on the first page and a little yellow post-it note placed there saying "Meet me in my office at 18:00, please".

It was still 17:50, you could still get away from there and that conversation, but you didn't want to, as nervous as you were you knew what you needed to do. You knock on the door and open it just as you hear a "come in" coming from inside.

"You came" he says getting up from his chair and gives you a shy smile.

"You asked..."

"I didn't think you would actually come."

"I think we really should talk Mr. Holland" you says nervously looking down at her own feet so she doesn't have to face him.

"Mister Holland?" He asks "I thought i asked to call me Tom"

"I can't do that"

"I understand" His voice, there was something different in it, hurt perhaps.

A silence fills the room for a few minutes before he begins to speak.

"I'm sorry about Friday."

"Why are you apologizing?" You asks without understanding.

"I just...thought you..." He sighs walking over to stand in front of your desk, only a few steps away from you.

"I don't regret what we did" You speak as soon as you realize where your speech was going.

"No?" He finally looks directly at you.

"No, my God, I loved every part of that night" a small smile appears on his lips which fades soon after as you continue to speak "But that doesn't mean it wasn't wrong, we shouldn't have let it get to that point".

"I know it wasn't, I know...it was so wrong"

For some reason it was painful to be in that room without being able to touch him again.

"I really wish I wasn't your teacher" he walks towards you "To have met you at another time, maybe then I could have had you to myself, take you out without fear of anyone seeing us, hold your hand, kiss you" His hand caresses your face and you close your eyes leaning in to feel his touch more "I wanted so much Y/N, I wanted to make you my girl...I really like you"

"Thomas, I like you too..." You sigh, your heart aching with every word spoken "But sometimes liking isn't enough for two people to stay together."

"I know, and that's the part that hurts the most" He forehead rests against yours, both of you with your eyes closed, in-between sloshed breaths that were already mingling, Tom felt a tear run down his cheek, your mouths so close "Y/N..."

"Thomas..."

"Tom man, we are late, your brothers will kill us if we are late again" Someone says opening the door suddenly just as you and he are about to kiss. The two of you quickly walk away panting for breath trying to recover from the moment, Tom quickly wipes the tear from his face. A tall blond man that you had seen other times in the halls together with Tom looks at you not understanding anything.

"Am I interrupting something?" the blond man asks suspiciously.

"No" the two of you answer quickly.

"Harrison, this is my student, Y/N" Tom introduces the two of you, perhaps as a way to change the subject "Y/N, this is Harrison Osterfield, professor in the physics department and my best friend".

"It is a pleasure to meet you Miss Y/N" He extends his hand to greet her " I have heard Tom compliment you several times, always saying that you are the best student in your class".

"My pleasure Mr. Osterfield" you shake his hand "I think he is just exaggerating a lot, anyway, I better go, I don't want to get in the way anymore, bye" you take your things and leave the room leaving the two men alone there.

"Wait a moment" He say to Harrison before coming after you.

He holds your wrist and makes you look at him, honestly he almost didn't care anymore that the two of you were standing in the middle of the empty university hallway.

"Y/N please" he says.

"Please what?" you say hurt "Do you want me to stay here? To fight for a passion that is doomed to fail? Something that could end my life at this university or end your career?

"Don't talk like that, we can make it work" he says hurt.

"I wish I was brave enough to try, I swear I do" you let go of his hand "But I'm not, it was just one night stand sex and as much as I like you I know that the sooner we get over it and move on the better, for both of us" you turn and walk away, leaving Tom standing there alone in the hallway with his hurt.

THURSDAY:

Your heart was still hurting. Last night you collapsed on your knees as soon as you got to your dorm room and let the tears finally fall, you were lucky you didn't have a roommate so you could cry all day long without having to answer questions about why you were so bad. And you cried until your eyes hurt, screamed against your pillow until your throat burned, let the sadness leave your body until you finally gave in to tiredness and went to sleep.

Tom was no better off than you, he spent the whole dinner with your family quiet while everyone else at the table talked, he wished so much that he wasn't in love with you, he wished it really had only been one-night stands, maybe then he wouldn't feel like he could die at any moment if he didn't have you by his side.

In different places, but sharing the same pain.

FRIDAY:

Tom looked across the room at you, his eyes red and his expression sad, it looked like you had been crying all night, and you really had, he wanted to go over there and hug you and tell you that everything would be okay, but he couldn't.

If they had thought Monday's class had been torture, this was something worse. Tom gave his class trying to avoid looking in your direction, while you couldn't pay attention to anything that was being said, you just wanted to go back to your room and cry some more. It was the last class of the day so you ran to your room as soon as it was over.

•─────✧─────•─────✧─────•

Tom was tapping his pen frantically on his desk, he should have been correcting his students' work but his mind was elsewhere and his head hurt like it was going to explode at any moment.

"Okay, what the fuck is going on?" Harrison asks, he was with Tom in his office and was starting to get irritated with his best friend.

"What?" Tom asks waking up from his thoughts.

"Tom you've been acting weird all fucking week, you spent the entire Wednesday dinner quiet a thing you don't often do."

"I don't know what you are talking about" he pretends to be paying attention to the papers in front of him.

"Does it have anything to do with that girl who was here?" he asks curious, Tom doesn't answer which only confirms Harrison's thoughts "Oh my god, it has everything to do with her doesn't it?".

"I really don't want to talk about it"

"You like her, that's why you're all emotional, because you can't be with her" Harrison speaks and Tom wonders when did his best friend get so good at unraveling his feelings.

"I had sex with her on Friday" Tom admits at once, his friend had already figured out pretty much everything so there was no reason to keep secrets anymore.

"WHY DID YOU NOT TELL ME THAT?" he practically shouts.

"Can you keep it down please, you're acting like a teenager, we passed that stage a long time ago and I don't want the whole campus to find out."

"I'm not the one acting like a teenager, you are, getting all angry and quiet over something that can easily be resolved" Harrison rolls his eyes as he states the obvious.

"She doesn't want me Harrison, she likes me, but she doesn't want me, she's scared and I can't judge her because I am too, this could destroy my teaching career and end her reputation here"

"Tom, isn't she one of the students graduating this year?" Harrison asked even though he already knew the answer.

"Yeah"

"Dude, she's graduating in less than 5 months and you're telling me that the two of you can't keep this relationship a secret for 5 months?"

"I..." Tom hadn't stopped to think about it.

"I'm sure you two can make it work."

"What if she's not willing to try?"

"You should at least try, Holland, go out there and fight for your girl" He encourages his friend.

"I think you are right, I will do it".

"Of course I'm right" He smiles smugly "Anyway, I don't want to have to put up with your sadness any longer" He says laughing.

•─────✧─────•─────✧─────•

It was almost midnight when you hear someone knocking on your dormitory door, you get out of bed and go to open the door.

"Thomas what are you doing here?" You ask as you see him standing outside, he walks into your dorm still without giving any explanation, you close the door and turn to see him "What kind of idiotic idea is this to come to my dorm, someone could see you here, how would we explain this?" You ask in an agitated manner.

Tom doesn't answer at first, he just looks at you, the baggy sweatshirt too big for your body, the hair tied back with a few strands falling in front of your face and the glasses on the end of your nose, and he can't resist. He walks toward you and kisses you, holding your face between his hands, his hands against your chest as you respond to his kiss, his heart beating hard in his chest and the sense of relief that he is kissing you again after what seems like the longest week of his life.

"I'm sorry" he says pulling away "I didn't come to do this, I just wanted to talk and..."

"It's okay" he fixes his glasses on his face.

"Y/N, I really like you, this is so stupid, I just... I want to try this, it's only five months until you graduate, we can make it...

"Tom" you try to interrupt him but he keeps talking non-stop.

"...to do this, I'm sure it wouldn't be easy at first and it's not the kind of relationship that's ideal or the relationship that someone like you deserves..."

"Tom" calls him again.

"But I'm willing to try, for you, for us, I want to try..." You kiss him again making him stop talking.

"I'm willing to try Tom" you say between kisses and he smiles "For us"

"I didn't think you would accept, I was already preparing myself for a no" you both laugh.

He sits down on your bed and pulls you to sit on his lap with each leg on one side of your body, he takes the glasses off your face and places them on your desk before kissing you.

"Damn, I missed that" he sighs between the kiss.

"It's literally only been a week" you say smiling.

"Really? It's felt like forever" he kisses you more intensely this time, his hands gripping your hips tightly making you move over his lap, the kisses slide down your face to your neck, you throw your head back.

"Tom" you say his name as a plea, his hands slide up your thigh squeezing you firmly.

"What do you want princess?" He asks with his head in the curve of your neck before leaving a small bite in that region.

"You, Thomas, I need you" you slowly roll over in his lap feeling his already hard length under you "please".

He smiles smugly at your response. Your sweatshirt is removed leaving you in just your panties and Tom lays you down on your bed placing his body on top of yours .

"This has been the most torturous week of my life" he removes the rest of his clothes and throws them on the floor "I couldn't get you out of my mind" he leaves a kiss on her neck exactly where he had "I thought about how I wanted to feel you again" the kisses descend to the top of her breasts and one of his hands grab her thigh wrapping her leg around his waist while the other goes down to her intimacy pulling her panties apart just enough for two fingers to touch them "That pussy is so wet, all this for me honey? "

"Yes, all for you Tom" he smiles at her answer before penetrating her with his fingers causing a quiet moan to come from her lips.

"Good girl."

"Your girl" you sigh ecstatic with pleasure.

"Fuck" Tom kisses you again, your words making him even harder than he already was "Say that again " he thrusts his fingers inside you reaching that wonderful spot inside you.

"I.Am.Your.Girl."

"My girl."

He had barely started and you were already so close, but he doesn't let you get there, teases you to the edge before stopping and doing it all over again.

"Please stop teasing me, I'm so close" you beg.

"No princess, I want you to cum around my dick" He says pulling his fingers out of you and removing your panties before turning you both over on the bed making you stand on top, he sits against the headboard as you rest your hands on his shoulders "now ride me like the good girl I know you are".

You sit on his member feeling him fill you completely, you both moan the moment you are finally together, standing still for a moment to get used to his size. Moving slowly until you finally get into a rhythm.

"So so good" he moans, his hand gripping her throat the way he remembered he had made her go crazy last time "So beautiful riding my dick" his other hand leaves a slap on her ass making her moan his name out loud as she throws her head, back rolling over in his lap .

"Tom I'm so close" you say as he gives you a push with his hips making his cock hit your G-spot, his hand making circular motions against your clit this time.

"Come to me then baby" he says and with a few more movements you are enjoying his wrist making you come next, your head falls on his shoulder and he spreads kisses down your neck as you recover from your recent orgasm.

•─────✧─────•─────✧─────•

You were wearing your shirt now, your head lying on his chest as he stroked your hair.

"You'll still be here when I wake up, right?

"Well this is my dorm so I can't leave" you say as a joke.

"I'm serious Y/N" he says laughing.

"Yeah, I'm not going anywhere" you smile fondly returning to lie on his chest closing your eyes almost falling asleep with his affection.

"Good, I don't want you to leave, I want you forever" he kisses the top of your head before falling asleep with you in his arms, no goodbyes this time.

#tom holland imagine #tom holland one shot #tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland smut #tom holland x you

[1800-fight-me]

Sweet like candy

Javier Peña x Fem!Reader (no y/n)

Friends to exes to lovers- angst with a happy ending 

Warnings: cursing, arguing, and smut 

Word count: 5k

Author’s note: This was beta read by my boo thang @just-here-for-the-moment​ and it is with her encouragement that I finally had the courage to post this so I hope ya’ll like it! Here’s a link to my masterlist if you’d like to check out my other writing!

“Hey candy girl.”

You froze at the sound of that voice, the aching familiarity of those words. The happiness and hurt associated with them. He’s teased you with that nickname for as long as you’ve known him. 

You finally found the courage to turn around from where you were restocking behind the counter of the candy shop you managed. Part of you was sure you imagined it. It couldn’t be him. It just couldn’t. 

You’d moved on with your life. He couldn’t just appear out of nowhere like this and bring it all crashing down again. 

He looked as devastatingly handsome as he did all those years ago. Older, but he had clearly aged like fine wine. 

You steeled your resolve and refused to let your emotions control you. You would not cry. 

“Javier? What are you doing here?” 

“Oh you know me, dulzura, I’ve got a sweet tooth.” 

It was suddenly hard to breathe. 

You pointed a finger at him and felt your eyes water. 

“Don’t call me that. You don’t have the right anymore.” You were so mad he still had such a hold over your emotions. 

“I missed you,” he said, his voice mesmerizing. He was pulling you right back in with so few words and it terrified you. 

“You don’t get to miss me. You left me. You ran away as soon as you got scared.” Your voice didn’t have the strength you wanted it to. You sounded as broken as you felt. 

“Dulzura, I-“ 

“Hey babe!” You looked up and saw your boyfriend Mark walk in. 

“Hi. Thanks for picking me up.” He came over and kissed you. You pulled back quickly with a murmured, “Let’s go.” 

“I’m not interrupting anything am I?”

“No,” you said. 

At the same time Javier said, “Yes.” 

Mark looked back and forth between you and Javier, obviously confused. 

“I’ll give you a minute,” he decided, then went outside to wait for you in the car. 

Javier lifted an eyebrow at you. “Babe?”

You sighed. 

“You hate being called babe,” he said with amusement in his voice. 

“It’s new. I- you know what? I don’t have to explain myself to you.” 

He sighed and nodded slightly. His voice softened and he said, “Can we talk?” 

“No.” 

“Please?” 

“No. I have to go,” you said and stormed out before he could say anything. Your coworker was there and could cover for you so you weren’t worried about abandoning the store. You’d text her as soon as you calmed down. 

“You okay babe?” Mark asked you and you sighed. 

“Yeah I’m fine,” you snapped. 

You really did hate being called babe. You hated that after all these years Javier still knew you more than anyone else. 

Maybe it’s because after he left you never truly let anyone else in. 

You rubbed your temples and took deep breaths to try to calm down. It only helped minimally. 

“Who was that guy?”

“Nobody. He’s an asshole.”

“Do you know him?”

“No,’ you lied. 

“Man asshole customers are the worst,'' he said sympathetically. 

“Mmhmm”

“Does pizza and a movie sound good to you tonight?”

You exhaled, “Yeah that sounds nice.” 

******

First Grade- Laredo, TX

You were terrified to be the new girl at school halfway through the year. Moving was really hard, you missed your old house and your best friend. Your first week at the new school hadn’t gone too well. 

Your mom told you to bring some candy and give it to all your classmates to help you make friends. You thought it was a stupid idea, but you were out of your own ideas. 

At recess kids swarmed you as you handed them candy, but they all ran away as soon as they had it. 

You sat by yourself, upset about your lack of luck.

You looked up when you heard a voice say, “Hey candy girl!” 

You saw a little boy from a different class coming over to you. 

You put your hands on your hips and said, “My name is not candy girl.” 

“Well what is it then?” The little boy mimicked your movement and put his hands on his hips too. 

You told him and his response was, “Well, my name is Javier. Can I have some candy too?” 

The two of you grinned at each other and you didn’t know it then, but you had just met your best friend. 

******

The next day 

“What’s in this box?” Mark called from the other room. 

“What box?” You were in the bathroom getting ready for the day. 

“This one,” you heard him grunt and when you walked into the room saw him holding the box. 

“Nothing! Don’t worry about it. Why did you pull that out of the closet?” You were trying to keep your panicked voice calm. 

“The other day you said we should make some room for me to leave some stuff here. Like a drawer and some space in the closet…” 

“Sorry. Just-just put that back please? I’ll find you some space after work.” 

He nodded and you could tell he felt confused and maybe even hurt by your words but there were too many thoughts swirling in your brain to come up with the words to put his mind at ease. 

You weren’t ready for Javier to appear so suddenly and bust your life open, but it had already happened and you were left reeling. 

“So the mechanic said your car is ready to be picked up.” 

You sighed in relief of the subject change. “Yeah, if you could drop me off there so I can pick it up that would be great.” 

He nodded and smiled at you tentatively. You smiled softly back and determined that today would be a better day. 

******

The day he left 

You woke up and reached across the bed only to find it empty and cold. You weren’t too surprised, Javi had been having a hard time sleeping ever since he was cleared to work for the DEA. He didn’t know yet where they would send him and it was a touchy subject for the two of you. You hoped against hope that it would be close but you knew the reality of the situation. The two of you had been dating for about a year after years of silently yearning for each other. After all that, you figured your relationship could get through anything. 

You padded out to the kitchen, hoping to find him there but instead found a note in his messy scrawl. 

“I’m so sorry. I have to go. I never meant to hurt you. You have my heart always, dulzura.” 

You read it. Then read it again. And again. And again. 

You couldn’t comprehend what it meant. He left? To go where? He couldn’t leave. Javi was one of the only constants in your life. 

You stumbled to the phone and called Chucho. 

“Hello?” 

“Chucho?” your voice wobbled. 

He sighed. “Hija.” 

“Where-how could he-where did he go?” Your heart was racing. You hoped Chucho would reassure you that nothing was wrong. Maybe Javi was there with him and it was all a misunderstanding. 

“He went to Colombia,” Chucho’s voice was very soft. 

“No. He wouldn’t. He wouldn’t leave without talking to me about it, without telling me, right?” 

There was silence on the other end of the phone. 

“Right?!” The tears were flowing freely now. 

“I’m so sorry.” You dropped the phone and felt your heart crack in two. 

How could he do this to you? 

******

Your day did not go as planned. Everything that could possibly go wrong, did. 

You groaned in frustration. It was all because you were so distracted. For years you had kept your memories and feelings for Javier locked away in your mind, never to be touched. That all went to hell when he showed up yesterday. 

You couldn’t stop thinking about him. Memories came flooding back to you. You couldn’t sleep last night and not even Mark’s attempts to make you come could take your mind off of Javier. 

You really needed to break up with Mark. You weren’t nearly as interested in him as he was in you. 

That seemed to be the trend with all your relationships. Even before you knew you were in love with Javier, you focused more on him than on your various boyfriends. Nothing ever lasted because there was no one for you but Javier. 

Even after he broke your heart, there could be no one but him. 

So you made small frustrating mistakes all day and every time you heard the door of the shop open your head whipped up. Every damn time your heart raced, half in excitement, half in dread that it would be Javier walking through the door again. 

You knew he would try to talk to you again. You know Javier, he’s a stubborn and driven man. If he wants something he’ll work for it and get it nearly every damn time. So despite your rejection the day before, you knew he would keep trying. 

That worried you because you had always struggled with telling him no. And your resolve never held for very long when he gave you his best pleading look. But he had broken your heart and left you for years without a word. You couldn’t give into him easily. You wouldn’t. No explanation could excuse what he had done. 

******

Later that day 

You stared at the box in your closet. You knew you shouldn’t do it. You really should not open that goddamn box. 

Shit. You opened it. You pulled out everything and set it on the floor around you. 

You stared at the many pictures of you and Javier. The two of you as children hugging each other and grinning, teeth missing, and clothes dirty.  Both of you smiling on Halloween in your cute little costumes, your trick or treat bags full of candy. The two of you in your awkward preteen phases with braces and embarrassing haircuts. Both of you sticking your tongues out at the camera as Chucho tried to get a picture before you went to a rock concert in high school. Your senior prom, despite the two of you having dates that weren’t each other, Chucho managed to get a picture of just you and Javier. High school graduation. College graduation. A beach trip. Javier kissing you passionately as you both stood in front of the ranch. There were so many wonderful memories and it felt like a form of self harm to be looking at them now that they stung from Javier’s abandonment of you. 

The last and most horrible thing in the box was the note he left. You couldn’t bring yourself to read it again. 

A few weeks after he left, you decided instead of being sad you were going to be angry and you packed up this box and shoved it in the closet and packed up all his other shit he left in your apartment and dumped it on Chucho’s doorstep. 

The only thing you couldn’t make yourself pack away was his favorite t-shirt. The logo of your high school had long since faded but it didn’t matter because it was comfortable and his. You still wore it on nights you missed him the most. 

You were so focused on your task you didn’t hear Mark knocking on the door or coming into your apartment. 

“Babe?” 

You jerked in surprise and dropped the picture you were holding. It was the most recent picture of Javier hugging you from behind, you were both smiling and clearly in love, taken only weeks before he left. 

“Sorry I didn’t mean to scare you. I knocked. The door was unlocked.” 

“It-It’s okay.” 

“Who’s that?” He asked, looking down at the pictures. 

“Um.” 

“Wait a minute. I’ve seen that guy. He’s the one that was in your shop yesterday.” 

You sighed. “Yeah.” 

“Why would you lie to me about that? Are you cheating on me?” His voice was too accusatory for your liking. 

“No. Of course not. I don’t know why I lied. He just showed up out of the blue yesterday for the first time in years and it really threw me off.” 

“Oh. Okay. What did he say?” Mark relaxed a bit and sat down next to you. 

“He wants to talk,” you said weakly. 

“Do you want to talk to him?” He asked but his voice indicated there was a certain answer he was looking for. 

“No. Maybe. I don’t know.” 

Mark sighed. 

“He was just such a big part of my life.” 

He nodded as his eyes skimmed over all the pictures. 

“I don’t know what to do.” You felt your eyes brim with tears. You wanted to scream, you were so annoyed at how much Javier had made you cry by just being in your life again. 

The phone rang. You and Mark looked at each other. 

“Let it go to voicemail,” you said. 

“What’s his name?” Mark asked. 

“Javier.” You hated how your tongue always caressed his name. 

The answering machine beeped and you heard the message as it was being recorded. 

“Dulzura? I was really hoping we could talk. I’m sorry for just showing up yesterday and for everything that happened and for not calling. I just- could you call me back?-“ 

You picked up the phone before he could end his message. 

“Now you remember my phone number motherfucker?”

You practically screeched. 

He said your name in surprise but you bulldozed him and kept talking before he could get another word in. 

“Years. Javier Peña. It has been YEARS and now you call me? You couldn’t call me any sooner? You couldn’t show up any sooner?”

“I know dulzura and I’m sorry. Maybe I could come over and we could talk-“ 

“What makes you think I want to talk to you?” You were furious, beyond logic. 

“Well you did pick up the phone,” you could hear the trademark Javier smugness in his voice. 

“Listen to me cabrón, leave me alone. I do not want to talk to you,” your voice quivered with rage. You hung up the phone before he could say anything more. You knew the more you let him talk the more his quick tongue would convince you to listen to him. 

You collapsed to the floor and covered your face to hide your sobs. 

Mark wrapped his arm around you to comfort you. You let him until you pulled yourself together and looked at him. 

“I think we should break up,” you said. 

He sighed. “Because of him?”

“You don’t deserve to get wrapped up in this.” 

“He’s clearly a dick. You shouldn’t have to deal with this alone.”

“I still love him,” you said bluntly and he looked at you in surprise. 

“What?” 

“He’s the love of my life. I’ve loved him since I knew what love is. I wish I could hate him more than I love him but I can’t. I-I don’t know if that means I’ll let him back in my life. But you don’t deserve someone who is in love with someone else. You deserve better.” 

Mark sighed and nodded. “I always worried I was more invested in this relationship than you.” 

“I’m sorry,” was all you could offer. 

He nodded and stood. You watched him collect all his things. With his hand on the door handle, he looked at you and said, “For what it’s worth, I hope you don’t let him back in your life. You deserve better too.”

You smiled weakly and nodded then watched him leave. 

******

You were underneath Javier as he pushed himself inside you and groaned your name. 

“Fuck dulzura you’re so fucking tight. Perfect. You’re absolutely perfect. You take my cock so well.” 

You moaned and yanked his mouth to yours. 

He set a brutal pace that hit you in just the right spot and caused you to lose your mind. 

“Javi,” you whined as your nails scratched at his back. 

“You’re mine,” he growled into your ear and you gasped. 

“Say it,” he accentuated his words with a bite to your neck. 

You gasped. “Fuck. Javi I’m yours. Always yours. Only yours.” 

“God, yes that’s it baby,” he said and used his finger to circle your clit. 

“Come for me dulzura.” 

You moaned and your body obeyed him, as it always did. 

“Fuck yes. You’re such a good girl “ he grinded somehow deeper into you with a groan. 

Your moans and whines were now loud enough to surely wake all the neighbors but you couldn’t care less. 

He came in you with a grunt of your name then smashed his lips to yours, practically panting in your mouth. 

You woke with a gasp and sat straight up in bed. These types of dreams were almost worse than the nightmares. You hated waking up wet with need and craving Javier’s cock. It happened all too often. Even when you were in relationships with other men. No one had ever taken care of you and satisfied you the way Javi did. 

You rolled over and screamed in frustration into your pillow. You looked at the clock and saw it was only minutes before your alarm went off. This was going to be a long fucking day. 

******

You struggled through the day. Breaking up with Mark and dealing with Javier was too much. You managed to calm your swirling thoughts enough to pleasantly take care of your customers and work through some of the many piles of paperwork on your desk.  

Your phone rang and you contemplated not answering. You couldn’t deal with another call today, whether or not it was about the shop. 

You sighed. “Hello?”

“Hija,” you heard Chucho’s voice say. 

“Hi Chucho.” 

“How are you?” The sympathy in his voice was comforting even though the last thing you wanted right now was to talk to a Peña man. 

“How could you not tell me he was back?” 

“Hija-”

“No. Chucho, he just showed up here! He showed up unannounced and blew my life up!’ 

“I know. I’m so sorry.” 

You were sobbing now. “I just- I don’t know what to do. I-I don’t want to talk to him but I do. I- you know how much I’ve missed him.”

“I know. But I also know he has missed you just as much.” 

“But this is his fault. He wouldn't have to miss me if he never-”

“I know. I know,’ he placated. 

You wiped your tears and took a few deep calming breaths. 

“Maybe you should talk to him,” Chucho said softly. You knew he wouldn't take sides, he wouldn’t convince you to talk to Javier if it would hurt you. 

You sniffled. “Maybe. I don’t know.” 

“It’ll be okay.”

You sighed, “You’re probably right. You’re usually right” 

He chuckled lightly and you smiled. 

“Thanks for checking on me Chucho.” 

“Of course. Let me know if you need anything.” 

Despite crying once again, you felt better after talking to Chucho. You knew you would cave eventually and talk to Javier. The truth is you were exhausted after years of being angry at him. You didn’t want to hold onto the anger and hurt anymore, you just wanted your friend back. 

You knew the stubborn asshole would try to contact you again, you wouldn't let him off easy, and you would absolutely give him hell, but you decided to hear him out. 

******

Before you dealt with any more drama you were going to treat yourself and wallow in self pity for the night. 

You just broke up with your boyfriend and were reeling from a certain ex best friend crashing back into your life.

So you put on your comfiest clothes, Javier’s old tshirt and a pair of pajama shorts, ordered a pizza, and sat on the couch watching trashy tv with a pint of ice cream. It felt good to relax and ignore your problems for a little while. 

There was a knock at the door and you grabbed your cash to pay for the pizza. 

You opened the door to see Javier there with his fist raised to knock again. 

“You’re not pizza,” you said, annoyance evident in your tone. 

He raised an eyebrow at you quizzically but before he could say anything you moved to close the door in his face. 

He stopped you from closing the door easily with a hand. You could see the frustration underneath his calm facade. He took a deep breath then said your name as placatingly as possible. 

You cocked your head. “I’m sorry, am I annoying you? I can't imagine what that must feel like,” you said, your voice dripping with sarcasm. 

He sighed and folded his arms over his chest before he said, “I forgot how stubborn you can be.” 

Your eyebrows shot up, “Me? I’m stubborn? You’re the most stubborn infuriating man I’ve ever met!” 

“Um, I have a pizza here for this apartment…” a small feminine voice said. 

You shouldered past Javier to get to the teenager. She gave you a nervous smile as her eyes flickered between you and the brooding man looming over you. 

“Everything is fine,” you said to her. 

“Javier, go inside. You’re making her nervous,” you ordered him over your shoulder. You heard his footsteps retreat into your apartment. 

You paid her and told her to keep the change, tipping her generously for having to deal with the two of you. 

“Thank you,” you said as she handed you the pizza and this time her smile was more genuine. 

You stomped into the apartment only to see Javier standing in the middle of the living room looking around. You dropped the pizza on the counter and walked closer to him. 

“Everything is different,” he murmured. 

“I redecorated,” you said gruffly. 

He looked at you then said, “Is that my shirt?” 

You felt your face flush but refused to show any weakness, “No.” 

He smirked, “No it’s definitely mine. I remember making that hole in the shoulder.” 

You glared at him. “It’s my shirt. It’s been here for years, so it’s mine.” 

That infuriatingly beautiful smirk didn’t leave his gorgeous face. “I see.” 

You rolled your eyes and plopped down on the couch. 

He sat next to you, close enough that you could almost feel his warmth. You could smell his comforting scent, he smelled like home. You wondered if he thought the same thing about you. You wondered if he missed you as much as you missed him. If it hurt him to breathe when you weren’t there. If it hurt to breathe now that you were so close. You wondered if he felt the same as you. 

You realized you had been staring into the depths of his warm brown eyes for far too long, but you couldn’t make yourself stop. The same eyes that haunted you in your sleep. 

His eyes showed profoundly how much he cares for you and missed you, he didn’t need to say it. They held such sadness and regret. 

“Dulzura, I had a whole speech planned but I don’t…,” he sighed, “none of it feels right. I know there’s nothing I can say or do to make up for how I hurt you. But I’m so sorry and I missed you more than I can express. I must have picked up the phone to call you hundreds of times while I was in Colombia.  I’m so sorry. I… will you please let me back in your life? Whatever that means for you, if-if it’s just as friends that’s fine with me but I just need you in my life.” 

You looked down at his hand and tentatively took it. His rough skin against yours grounded you and lit you on fire at the same time. 

“I’m so tired Javi,” he let out a sigh of relief at your use of his nickname, “I’m tired of missing you, of feeling angry and hurt, of worrying about your safety and well-being, of feeling like you took a part of me when you left.” 

His other hand now caressed your cheek and you nuzzled your face into it. 

“I- I don’t know how to live without you. I don’t want to,” you said and his breath caught. 

You saw the weight leave his shoulders. With the hand that was holding yours he tugged you to him. You crawled into his lap and buried your face in his neck as he wrapped his arms around you. You quickly wrapped your arms around him too. 

Your breaths became uneven and you choked on a sob. “I’m here. I’m here now. I’m yours, dulzura, always,” he said, his voice low, and squeezed you to him. 

You sobbed into his neck and he held you and rubbed your back as you did. 

“Always?” 

He pulled you back so you could look him in the eyes. 

“You have had my heart since the day I met you. I’m so sorry for breaking yours,” he said softly but with so much conviction. 

You nodded and before you could second guess your decision you surged forward and pressed your lips against his. 

He groaned as you deepened the kiss, tangling your tongue with his. 

He pulled back from you and you saw in his face that it took all the strength and self control he had. 

“Javi?” you asked tentatively, fearing rejection. 

“I can’t believe I’m asking this, but what does this mean to you? If you don’t want to be with me I don’t-“ 

You put your hands on either side of his face and silenced him with a soft kiss. 

“I love you, Javier Peña. I always have and I always will. Even when I’m mad at you, I love you. I’m just glad you’re home.” 

He sighed in relief and buried his face in your chest. 

“What happened to you in Colombia Javi? What did you have to endure without me?” Your questions were barely above a whisper. 

His grip on you tightened at your words. You ran your fingers through his hair, relaxing him the way you know he loved, and he told you. He told you everything about hunting escobar, dealing with los pepes, arresting the cali godfathers, everything. 

He teared up at times during his story and you held him and comforted him. When he was done, with a fragile look in his eyes, he asked if you could still love him knowing now some of the poor decisions he made. 

You reassured him that you were his, always, just like he was yours. 

For hours you talked and held one another. Content with the feeling of being home in each other’s arms. 

He kissed you slowly, like time wasn’t a factor, like he had the rest of his life to kiss you and relearn your body. 

“Javi,” you whined after his lips had been on yours for what seemed like hours, “I need you.” 

“Fucking hell dulzura, I’ve dreamed of you saying those words to me for so long,” he groaned into your neck then kissed his way down your throat. You could feel his smile on your skin as you whined and keened as his attention. 

He took your shirt off with a growled, “You look so good in my fucking shirt.”

You gasped, “I-I wear it when I miss you.” 

He moaned into your neck. 

“I’d wear it when I’d touch myself thinking about you,” you gasped out. 

“You’re so goddamn perfect,” he said with a nip to your neck. 

His lips moved down your body, stopping to lavish love on your chest before moving down and ripping your shorts and panties off and spreading your legs. 

He licked and sucked at your core and you moaned, “Oh god, Javi I missed you so much.” 

He moaned before pulling back and looking at you with a smirk. 

“I missed you too. Missed your pretty pussy. Missed the gorgeous sounds you make when you come. Come for me,” he dove back in and groaned your name when you came for him. 

The satisfied glaze in his eyes and your wetness on his lips and mustache stoked the fire in you again and you needed to feel him inside you more than you needed to breathe. 

“I need you,” you whined again. 

You ripped his shirt off and your hands roamed over every inch of his glorious chest and broad shoulders before dipping down to his waist. Before you needed to ask him, he pulled his jeans off, making your mouth water at the sight of his cock that you missed so much. 

“You have me,” he said and pushed himself inside you slowly, inch by inch. 

You yanked him down to you and melded your lips with his, moaning at the taste of yourself in his mouth. 

When you bit his lip he hissed and increased his pace, hitting the spot so deep inside you that made you see stars. 

Your groans mixed with his and filled your apartment, making it feel like home again. 

You fell over the edge and he lavished you in praises. 

You could tell he was close to finding his own release and you pulled his head from your neck to look deep into his beautiful brown eyes. 

“I love you, Javi.” 

He gave you a bruising kiss. 

“I love you…so much…it’s you and me…forever dulzura,” he gasped. 

“Forever,” you agreed and he came with a moan of your name. 

You stayed tangled up with each other for a long time, both of you unwilling to let go now that you had a taste of heaven again in one another’s arms. 

After a while you asked, “You’re back for good, right?” 

“My home is wherever you are.” 

You grinned and he pulled you in for a sweet kiss. 

“You’re my home too, Javier,” you said snuggling in closer. 

“You’re too sweet to me, candy girl,” he said with a chuckle and you couldn’t help but laugh with him. 

Everything taglist: @spideysimpossiblegirl​

Thanks for reading! Please give me feedback! Leave a comment or shoot me a message if you want to be added to my everything taglist or my Javi taglist! 

#javier peña #narcos #javier peña fic #javier peña fanfic #javier peña x reader #javier peña x you #javier peña x y/n #javier peña x female reader #javier peña x fem!reader #javier peña x f!reader #javier peña smut #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters

[bvidzsoo]

White Lilies

 Author: bvidzsoo

 Pairing: Jeon Wonwoo x female reader

 Warning: swearing, violence, mentions of death, stalking, breaking in, borderline toxic relationship, allude to some mental health conditions but never named

 Word count: 26, 815

 Summary: Your brother, Kim Doyoung, works for the police. Ever since you finished high school, you moved away from home with him and now you live in a big city. You struggle with different things, but the worst one is the tendency to stalk others. And one day when you walk inside a coffee shop and come across a very handsome stranger, you can’t help yourself, he becomes your next target. Jeon Wonwoo. But he isn’t innocent, you find that out the hard way.

 Taglist: @chal-kagyu​ @taeyongandfree​ @minkwans​ @itsdnguyenxoxo​ @rjsmochii​

 Unable to tag: @cheolliehugs @3rachaonlyfans @leahxxiong

 A/N: Here it is! The spin off to Poison, it can be read as a stand alone, if not check out the mini-series: Poison. Minor things will make more sense. I hope it doesn’t bother you that I tagged you for this too, since it’s connected in some ways. Now, there’s things I have written in this oneshot that are totally not okay and I am very conscious of them, so please, if you ever come across a stalker or someone who harassess you, please report them, your safety is very important. But this is fiction, and I’m allowed to write whatever I want to. All the sentences in italics are the voices that Y/N hears. Enjoy now and don’t forget to leave feeback!

           All mornings were usually the same, it was a routine I became accustomed to a long time again. Five years ago, actually, when Doyoung and I moved away from home. There is only a two-year difference between us, so it was easy for me to follow him, having been already done with high school. Doyoung completed the police academy and he was being promoted, brought to Seoul, so I packed up and left my old life in our hometown. Nothing tied me to that place, I never liked it there. My parents were hot headed and they always argued with me, trying to convince me to become a house wife, to find myself a wealthy man that would care for me and for our family. But it wasn’t what I needed; I had always been a free spirit. I liked to explore and disappear from civilization from time to time. Like in eleventh grade, when I sneaked out and disappeared for ten days, the whole city was looking for me. However, I was living in the woods, by the outskirts of the city, in a small hut with a nice, old lady. She moved there after she gave up her job, because she wanted a peaceful life, surrounded by nature only. When she saw me wandering around, she offered me some tea and I accepted it, surprised to see someone living there. The hut wasn’t deep inside the woods, but it still took me by surprise that a lady like her wasn’t afraid inside there all alone. I wasn’t a big fan of forests, but being surrounded by trees and the green scenery always calmed my erratic nature. It was hard for me to stay still sometimes, that’s why Doyoung and I would regularly go on runs, to try and use up my energy on something. In school, I didn’t do very well, but it didn’t bother me. I was able to finish high school and get a diploma, but I didn’t want to go to college. I found it a waste of time and money, I decided I would find something that I liked doing and would excel in it. And with the help of the old lady from the hut, I realized I had a passion for photography. I got my first camera from her, and ever since then I didn’t stop taking pictures. It became my passion and my hobby, it earned me money. I was known for taking nature pictures, sometimes even of animals, and I had my own little blog where I posted all of my works. Sometimes I’d have my pictures put up in galleries for expositions, I earned well during those events. The small house Doyoung and I lived in, was full of all the pictures I took. We lived in a homey, quiet neighborhood, deep inside the heart of the city. Doyoung earned well and my salary always fluctuated, that’s why I decided to stay with my big brother, at least until I had gathered enough money to live on my own.

The house smelled of bacon and peppermint tea as I opened the window of my room, letting the fresh morning air in. I was already dressed for the day, camera packed safely inside my bag, waiting for a call. I wore dark velvet cotton pants and an oversized grey sweater with a deep V, due to which it fell off my shoulders. Ankle high heel boots and a few necklaces I used as accessories complimented the look. It was becoming warmer and warmer outside, which was great, because I never liked wearing coats. Besides, I rarely needed them, I had the unusual trait of not exactly feeling the cold. I was always underdressed during winter and it scared some people, especially Doyoung because he had the impression that I’d catch a cold, but it’s just how my body was, always too hot. I checked my phone to be sure that Mark didn’t decide to text me instead of calling me, but seeing there was nothing, I closed the window and took my bag, leaving my room. I closed the door after me, a habit I had, and headed inside the kitchen. Doyoung was in his police uniform already, moving around quietly the kitchen.

“Good morning!” I called loudly, sitting at the table, with my chin in my hand.

“Good morning.” Doyoung greeted, quieter, and turned around with a plate and mug in his hands. He placed them in front of me and I grinned, thanking him. I took the fork and dug into my breakfast, humming at how tasty it was. Even if our mornings were always the same, the breakfast wasn’t. Doyoung always had something up his sleeves, either trying out new recipes he searched up late at night, or just trying to replicate mother’s old recipes. I took a sip of the peppermint tea and pursed my lips, giving Doyoung a thumbs up as he closed the stove and turned to sit with his own plate and mug in his hands. He chuckled and mirror my thumbs up, before starting to eat too. We ate in silence, it’s how we were in the mornings, quiet. It was the only time Doyoung could savor the silence, because it was the only time I was silent. My hyperactivity followed me through all stages of life, I still struggled with staying still…that amongst other things.

Doyoung cleared his throat and I glanced at him, before checking my phone again, “What are your plans for today?”

“Ah, the usual.” I answered with a smile, trying to look nonchalant, so that he wouldn’t realize I was lying, “I’ll just go to the park and take some pictures if I find something I like.”

Doyoung nodded and took a bite of his bacon, “Don’t you think it’s time to…find a more stable work?”

“Like what?”

“Getting employed at a studio, maybe? You know…you could go to weddings, birthdays…all kinds of events to take pictures.” Doyoung’s suggestion was friendly, but it still angered me. I left home because I didn’t want to hear the constant nagging of our parents, but here he was, doing the same thing.

“I’m a nature photographer. And I wouldn’t like working inside a studio, or whatever.” I said a little harshly, making Doyoung sigh.

“I’m not judging you or trying to tell you what to do,” He knew how I could react to these things, he knew how much anxiety my parents induced when they would try and tell me what to do with my own life, “It was just a brotherly advice, because I worry about you.”

“You don’t have to!” I exclaimed cheerily, my phone ringing at the same time. I shot my hand out to grab it and answered the phone, already knowing who the caller was.

“Target is getting ready to leave, he’ll be at the same Coffee Shop he was for the past week.” Was all the person said before I hung up, stuffing the rest of the food inside my mouth hurriedly. I scrambled up from the chair and clumsily threw my phone inside my bag, trying to chug down the peppermint tea at the same time.

“Who was that?”

“Just some person trying to sell me something—” A burp I couldn’t control surfaced and Doyoung’s eyebrows furrowed in displeasure, but I just gave him an apologetic smile, “I’ll see you after work.”

I pressed a hasty kiss against his cheek, then raced to my car and unlocked it, throwing my bag inside before getting in. I would have to get to the Coffee Shop before the target gets there, to choose a good spot. This is what Doyoung didn’t know about me. I wasn’t just a nature photographer, I worked together with his colleague, Mark, whose job was to gather information about the targets the police had. He was really good at it, but sometimes he couldn’t gather enough information by sitting behind a computer. That’s where I come in play, I go out and stalk his targets. A year ago, Doyoung had a gathering with the colleagues he was closer to and I was invited too. Mark got really drunk and I offered to drive him home, that’s when he started telling me about his work. About how he already almost got fired twice, because his information wasn’t good enough or it was lacking. And because I was always seeking new experiences and new adventures, I proposed to help him. Of course, he’d have to pay me, but I’d stalk the targets for as long as he’d need me to. Until all information that was needed was gathered for him, which he could turn into a report and pass onto the higherups. He accepted without a second thought in his drunken haze and I was beyond happy; but I asked him to keep it a secret, especially from Doyoung. If my brother were to find out, he’d definitely either lock me up in our basement or send me back home, both were things I wouldn’t be able to survive. And being in this city was good for me, it was big enough that it distracted me from my other issues. Back in my hometown, everyone knew almost everyone and it was too easy to find someone you wanted to know. Which was bad for me, bad for someone who had stalking tendencies. That’s why I have been working with Mark for a year now, I was just too good, no one ever discovered me or my identity. I knew how to stay low-key and I knew how to work around the targets without them noticing that someone was trailing them almost 24/7. Having this job, it distracted me from getting infatuated with anyone, I didn’t have the time anymore. And it was a lot more thrilling to be trailing different people each month. It was a distraction from the dark voices in my head, which tried telling me that the next man that appeared around the corner could have been the love of my life. Or the woman that I ran into at the flower shop, could have been my soulmate. I hated those thoughts, and I battled with them my whole life. I used to take medication, it silenced them while I was a teen, but it still didn’t stop me from stalking others. So, as I grew older, I stopped taking them and I started spending more time in nature, where I was alone. Photography wasn’t just a job for me, it was my own therapy.

           Everything was set up perfectly, I grinned widely as I leaned back in my seat. My bag was on the chair next to me, the camera placed on the table. For this to work, I needed as many people as there were inside the Coffee Shop to see it. Thankfully, traffic wasn’t bad and I got here five minutes before the target. I sat close to the exit, from where I could see the whole shop well and could run away too if something happened. The target too was really transparent, he sat at the same table he’s been sitting at for the past week. Next to the big windows, behind his table there were a bunch of plants decorating the place and a painting of flowers was hung above it. Which was perfect for me, my plan was coming together. The target has already ordered his coffee, so now it was my time to do something. I took my wallet and walked up to the barista, having hung the camera around my neck. The weight of it was comforting, having worn it for so long, that it became something familiar. I smiled at the barista and looked over the menu behind her, acting like I was thinking of what I wanted, offering her enough time to take in my attire closely.

“I’ll have Caramel Macchiato.” Finally, I told her and she nodded, returning the smile, as I handed her the money.

“A name?” I was glad this wasn’t the barista who took my orders the other times, I didn’t want them to recognize me. I wouldn’t come to this Coffee Shop either way anymore after I was done with this job.

“Y/N.” I answered the barista and she nodded, passing the cup with my name written on it, to her colleague. She printed the receipt and handed it to me, her eyes falling onto my camera. As there was no customer behind me at the moment, she looked at me curiously.

“You’re a photographer?” She asked as the coffee brewer started making loud noises.

“A nature photographer!” I told her with excitement and the barista nodded her head, offering me a friendly smile.

“I tried it once, it wasn’t made for me.” We chuckled at her words and I just shrugged.

“It requires patience and technique, for sure.” I said and she nodded her head in agreement, “By the way…this floral arrangement—”

And then I turned my body sideways, eyes falling on the target. He was just a few feet away, I made sure to speak even louder, so that he would hear me, “The floral arrangement is so pretty! Do you mind if I take pictures of it?”

The barista thought about it as my drink was done and handed to me by the other worker, “I don’t think it’s a problem, go ahead!”

“Thank you!” I bowed my head a little and she bid me farewell. My plan was working, I just needed to do one more thing. So, with the most innocent expression I could muster up, I approached the target. I knew he heard the conversation between me and the barista, but I wanted to make sure he understood what I was about to do.

“Sir, excuse me—” I spoke softly, almost shyly, “Do you mind if I take pictures of this floral arrangement? You won’t be in frame at all.”

“Go ahead.” He answered me with a very uninterested shrug, the wrinkles around his eyes made him look older than the age Mark told me. I bowed my head and placed my Caramel Macchiato on top of his table, turning on my camera. I kneeled on one knee and started snapping photos of the plants, pursing my lips, trying to get the perfect angle. Then I rose to my feet, and took another one, the painting above it being included in the shot too.

“I’ll take some more from my own table, just letting you know…” I spoke up again, but the man wasn’t paying attention to me. I smirked a little, grabbing my drink from his table, cradling it in both of my hands. With a victorious look on my face, I turned with enthusiasm and took a step forward blindly. My body slammed into another body, and we both yelped loudly. Mine was high pitched, but the other one was deep and almost guttural. My heart started thumping in my chest loudly, taken aback by the accident, and hopeful that I didn’t spill my drink on my favorite sweater nor on the person I ran into.

“I’m so—” But when I looked up, I was left breathless. The man standing in front of me was frowning, looking over himself, to check if anything got spilled on him. Thankfully, the lid of the drink was put on really well and the way I was holding the cup stopped it from spilling out. The thumping of my heart became deafening and all I could see suddenly was the man standing in front of me.

He’s the one. Don’t let him slip past your fingertips.

The dark voice, however, quickly snapped me out of the state I almost got lost in. The target, I’m here on a very serious mission, Mark’s counting on me. But the man’s eyes would be forever ebbed inside my mind, I knew I would think about his sharp, fox like eyes before going to sleep tonight…or every night. Round glasses sat on his long nose and he pushed them up with his long fingers, they almost fell off at the impact. When his lips started moving, all I could see was the redness of them and how deep his Cupid’s bow was. Then I snapped out of it, eyebrows furrowing as I totally missed what he just said.

“Uh—I’m really sorry.” I said awkwardly, stepping back when I realized how close our bodies were to each other.

“It’s fine, you didn’t spill any on me…or you.” His eyes went to the sweater I was wearing for a second before he looked back up. His deep voice sent goosebumps down my skin and I very visibly shivered, but I wasn’t cold. The dark blue hoodie this handsome stranger wore seemed to be alright.

“Yeah, I didn’t spill it…” My mind felt like it was made out of gum, I had no coherent thoughts and it made me feel awkward. Taking a last glance at the handsome stranger, noting how his black hair was clumsily parted above his left eye, I bowed, and then willed myself to move away.

He’s everything you’ve ever wanted.

I walked back to my table and took a seat, taking a deep breath in. I can’t let myself get distracted. I run into strangers all the time; this handsome, deep voiced man wasn’t different at all. I couldn’t let the voices get to me, I had to focus on the target. So, I took a big gulp of my Caramel Macchiato and then looked at the target. He was tapping the table almost nervously, so I turned on my camera again and took two pictures of him, then one of the floral arrangement to make sure it didn’t look suspicious. I looked around the Coffee Shop and my eyes fell on the handsome stranger, who was laughing with the barista. What could they have been talking about? The jingling of the door snapped me out of my own thoughts and I watched as a tall woman, wearing a business suit, walked inside. Her hair was in a low ponytail and she looked fairly young, I almost lost interest in her, but then she sat across from the target. I took another picture of the floral arrangement and then snapped a bunch of pictures of the two, making sure the woman’s face could be seen well in all. There was movement in the corner of my eyes and I saw the stranger sitting at a table close to the front desk.

You should snap a picture of him too.

I cleared my throat and took another sip of my drink, the target and the young woman got up from their table, and I quickly went to grab my bag and pushed my camera inside. As I stood up, a name was called.

“Wonwoo?” And I saw the handsome stranger stand up and walk up to the barista to take his drink. Wonwoo, that’s his name. But I shook my head and waved at the barista with a cheerful smile as I quickly left the Coffee Shop, eyes narrowing to see the couple. To my luck, they were walking on the other side of the road, so I remained on this side and fished out my camera.

So, you’ll leave Wonwoo for that pathetic old man and the woman? He’s not more important?

I shook my head and snapped a few pictures as I walked on the sidewalk, getting to a cross. I crossed the road and cursed when they disappeared around the corner, I had to speed up; and threw the cup in the trash bin as I have finished my drink. I looked around once I turned the corner and panicked for a second, thinking I lost the target. But suddenly, I spotted them sitting on a bench in the park, so I headed that way. I started taking pictures of the river and the few birds sitting by the shore, then of the trees that have blossomed already. The white cherry blossoms were beautiful and I smiled to myself as a light breeze brushed my hair. Then I willed myself to focus again and turned the camera towards the target and the woman, who had decided to take a walk. There was a decent distance between them and I, and to anyone else, it would look like I’m taking pictures of the nature; which I was still kind of doing. The couple walked around for at least five minutes, and I decided to sit on a bench and watch them from there, putting on my shades as the sun was directly in front of me. I was just about to snap a picture of a little duck family, but the woman leaned in towards the target and I quickly started snapping pictures of them. It looked like she whispered something in his ear and then a kiss was pressed against the target’s cheek and the woman walked the opposite way they have come in. I snapped pictures of her alone too before turning back towards the target, who was on his phone. He was on the other side of the river, and I couldn’t have reached him in time, or follow him, my car was ten minutes away from here. So, I just continued snapping more pictures, and my eyebrows furrowed when someone got into the frame. The black hair covered the side of the picture, and I moved a little to the left, leaning against the trunk of a tree. I snapped pictures of the license plate and of the target as he got inside the car, seeing someone already inside of it. I smirked to myself as the car drove away and pulled my phone out, going to my contacts. I pressed the icon next to the name ‘Money Bag’ and it dialed the number.

“Anything?” Mark picked up on the first ring.

“A young chick showed up, but they split up and I lost both. My car wasn’t close enough.”

“That’s fine, where are you now?”

“At the park, by the river.”

“Okay, meet me in front of the town hall.” I hung up and placed everything inside my bag as I started walking back to my car, enjoying the weather and the warm sunlight. Spring was finally around the corner, it was the perfect time to snap pictures of nature, or at least, my favorite time. As a second thought, I took my camera into my hands and turned it on, curious of how the nature pictures turned out. I scrolled past the ones of the target and woman, and chuckled when the one with the ducks came into view. They were cute, people would like this. As I continued looking through the pictures, the ones where someone got into them, made me frown. I was about to delete them, but my finger paused. Black hair, sharp jaw, long nose, round glasses.

You know you can’t delete it. You can’t fight the urge, can’t you? Wonwoo’s the one, listen to us!

           The town hall wasn’t far from the park, so I didn’t bother driving there. Besides, I liked taking walks. It helped with calming me, even though I was desperately in need of a run right now. After waking up, Doyoung and I go straight for a run, but I slept in this morning and I’m sure Doyoung woke up later too as he worked until late last night. He said his boss, Sana, was making him work extra hours because she was sniffing around a very powerful mafia leader. I was aware of the illegal things some people did, sometimes the people I had to stalk for Mark weren’t the brightest, I was well aware of that, but I was never offered information about them. It was Mark’s way of protecting me from harm, which I didn’t think did much. If I was caught, they wouldn’t care if I knew or not things about them, I probably would have been still tortured. Which is why I asked Mark to keep the details to himself, if I knew that I was stalking a mafia leader or some other gang member, I probably would’ve been too scared to go through with the procedure.  

I was shifting my weight from one leg to another as I stood waiting around for Mark, pouting when I looked down at my wrist watch. I’ve been standing here for ten minutes; I was becoming really bored. I took my phone and sent a text to Doyoung, checking up on him.

From Doyoung: Just had my lunch break, I’ll be heading back to work. It’s possible I’ll be back late once again.

To Doyoung: No problem, I’ll leave some dinner for you.

From Doyoung: What are you up to?

To Doyoung: I’ll be going for a run in a few minutes, see you at home!

From Doyoung: Take care of yourself!

I smiled and as I looked up, Mark was walking towards me. I started waving at him with a big grin, my phone almost fell from my grip, but I managed to steady it. Mark was wearing dark jeans and a black hoodie, with a black baseball cap on his head. If this was him trying to be casual, he was failing.

“Stop drawing attention to us!” He said with a hiss as he came to a stop in front of me and I frowned.

“That’s not how you should treat someone so important to your team.” I said and Mark rolled his eyes, extending one hand. He was gripping some cash and I took it with a grin, quickly placing it inside my bag.

“Well, since you asked so nicely…” I said teasingly and Mark rolled his eyes again, I handed him the memory card, “Take good care of it! And don’t delete the other pictures I took; some came out really well!”

“I won’t.” He said with a grin and then looked down at the card, “Your job is done here, wait until I contact you again. You could go on a vacation or something.”

I laughed quietly, giving Mark a look, “Yes, captain, I might just do that.”

Mark shook his head before taking off with a wave, I waved back and then turned to walk inside the second-hand shop. I greeted the lady and told her I just wanted to change inside the cabin, so she left me alone. I changed my normal attire into my running one. Yoga pants and adidas, a black top with a fluffy hoodie over it. I pulled my hair in a low bun and stuffed everything inside my big bag, it’s why I carried it around. Random runs were the best, always exciting as I never knew where I felt like going for one. I smiled at the lady from front desk as I left the shop, heading for my car. The walk was quick because I tried to hurry up, excited to go for the run. Once I got to my car, I placed my bag inside and then locked it, having my phone and keys in the pocket of the hoodie. I headed back to the park where I took the pictures of the target and woman, and first did a little warm up. I stretched my legs out and back a little, and then started running. I took steady breaths as I ran down the path, my pace not very fast but not slow either. My heartrate picked up as I continued running and I marveled in the peace around me. The scenery brought a smile onto my lips as I ran past some couples; I willed my mind to stop thinking. It was a hard thing to do at first, I was always thinking of something, but I had to learn due to the dark voices that would sometimes push me into doing things. I could ignore them, now better than when I was younger, but it was still difficult. The problem was, they could drive me crazy, I couldn’t ignore them forever, and in times like those, I would disappear. Doyoung hated it when I did that, but I haven’t had an episode like that in long.

But you can’t stop thinking about Wonwoo. You want him, you know it. You can’t lock us away anymore, Y/N, we are here. Wonwoo wants you too. Didn’t you see the way he looked at you? He fell for you, Y/N, listen to us once again. Do it. Just ask Mark. He’ll find him in a second for you. You didn’t delete his picture; you have his name—

A loud shout left my lips as I tumbled over some rocks that were on the path, but thankfully I didn’t fall. My eyebrows furrowed as I crouched down to hug my knees against my chest. I can’t let the voices get to me. I can’t let one stranger fuck up what I built up with so much struggle. I couldn’t let a stranger rule my life. I wouldn’t let the voices get to me, no matter what. I was stronger than that. With a deep breath, chest rising and falling quickly, I turned around and started running back. The energy burst I had this morning seemed to have disappeared, which was a good sign. I would have to take a bath at home and then cook some dinner, edit the pictures I took today after Mark drops off the memory card and post them on my blog. Well, that settles it then, I smiled as I came to the end of the path. I slowed down to a walk and took deep breaths, leveling my breathing. I turned to walk on the sidewalk and felt the breeze brush my hair once again, making me shiver a little bit. My body was warm from the run and I concluded that sitting inside my warm car while I was sweaty was probably a better idea than spending more time outside, in the cold breezy weather. But my mind went numb when I saw the black-haired man sitting on a bench with a book in his hands. My feet were still moving, but it felt like I wasn’t in control of it anymore. The Universe was really testing me today. I bit my lower lip and unconsciously grabbed my phone inside my pocket.

No, the Universe is doing for you what you didn’t want to do, Y/N. He’s right there, sitting on that bench, waiting for you. How could you let this opportunity slip past your fingertips? You want it, so do it.

I didn’t realize it until it was too late, my finger had already pressed the button, a picture of Wonwoo having been taken. I hated myself for doing it, but it felt like all stress finally left my body. I felt at ease, I wasn’t fighting with my thoughts anymore, with the dark voices. In the end, I really didn’t have a choice but to fall back into my old habits. And I was doing so well, until Wonwoo showed up. What will Doyoung think if he finds out? I can’t be sent to a psychic ward again, it wouldn’t help. They never help; I hate the medication they give me. I can survive without them too. Maybe if I stalk him for a week or two, I can get rid of the voices and go back to how I was before meeting him. But I pressed the button again, another picture snapped of Wonwoo. I wasn’t walking anymore, I was rooted in one place, mouth hanging open as I gazed at Wonwoo in awe. I must have looked hilarious, crazy even, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t look away; I couldn’t even move. But then suddenly, he didn’t flip the page of the book like he was planning to do, instead, he looked up. And his eyes fell on me, as if he felt that I was looking at him, and I jumped. His furrowed eyebrows snapped me out of my delirium, his sharp gaze sent a shiver down my spine and suddenly I found myself running away. I didn’t care what he thought, I was ashamed that I let the voices control me; it was time I headed home. It would be safer for everyone else if I just stayed at home.

That’s our girl, you’re doing amazing.

           The first thing I did once I got home was clean the house, my blood was boiling as I lost grip of the voices, which kept celebrating for I have taken those two pictures of Wonwoo in the park. In that rage, I deleted them from my phone and threw my phone in the trash bin I had in my room, slamming the door shut as I went to the bathroom to grab what I needed to clean the house. I turned on music, played it loudly too, blocking out the noises coming from outside, but the voices in my mind too. Due to my rage, I was done in almost two hours, it usually would take longer if someone tried to clean the house alone, we had a lot of stuff despite it not being a big house. Once I calmed down, I went to the kitchen and made some ramen, sweet potatoes made in the oven, and some seasoned pork. I went and bought beer for Doyoung and myself, and after putting them in the fridge, I decided to check my phone to see if anyone tried looking for me. It was six in the afternoon and I hoped Doyoung didn’t think that I was kidnapped…well, he’d actually know that. For my own safety, he installed an app on my phone that could track me. I only accepted it because I knew he worried a lot about me, Doyoung and I had a strong bond and the episodes I had always broke him mentally, I tried to be a better person for him too.

From Doyoung: I don’t think the ramens in the cupboard are still edible. Text me if you get home!

To Doyoung: Well, I cooked those ramens, so now they are edible! Sorry, I cleaned the house so I wasn’t around my phone…

From Doyoung: Cleaned the house? Are you feeling alright?

I chuckled at the fast reply, no surprise Sana made him stay plus hours if he hung on his phone while on duty.

To Doyoung: Don’t worry, I’m feeling perfectly fine! I hope Sana pays you well if you stay after working hours!

From Doyoung: Don’t worry about that, she stays with me.

To Doyoung: Oh! Someone’s getting it!

I laughed as Doyoung started typing back, imagining his angry and flustered face.

From Doyoung: Don’t be silly, Y/N!

To Doyoung: Okay, bye!

I laughed as I walked to the bathroom, turning on the warm water to have a bath. After the long day I had today, I deserved a warm, relaxing bath. I got a message from Mark, a thumbs up, and I knew the memory card was in the mailbox, so I quickly jumped into some shoes and ran outside to retrieve it. I locked the front gate, Doyoung had keys too, and then hurried back inside the house. I placed the memory card on my desk and then proceeded to undress while walking back to the bathroom. I turned the faucet off and threw some bath salts into the water, pulling my hair in a high bun. I shut the blinds of the bathroom and sighed, biting my lower lip. Would it be so bad if I asked Mark to look up Wonwoo a little bit? I wouldn’t try to do anything, I just wanted to know him better? I wasn’t doing anything wrong, right? I picked up my phone reluctantly as I sat on the side of the bathtub, easing my legs into the water. I went to my gallery and to the pictures I deleted, they didn’t get instantly deleted from my phone, they were stored there for another month before finally getting deleted off the device. I selected the two pictures of Wonwoo and sent them to Mark.

To Mark: His name is Wonwoo. Remember that favor you have going on? Return it by looking this guy up.

I threw the phone onto the clothing pile that was on the ground by the bathtub and lowered myself into the water, feeling bad that I couldn’t resist the urge. It was too easy with Mark, when I was a teenager, I would do everything by myself. It was thrilling to run after someone, watch them from a distance not knowing if they would notice you or not. And if they indeed noticed you, you could always play it off somehow. But this was safer, I couldn’t risk falling back into my old habits. It was like gambling or drugs…you needed rehabilitation from it, but the yearning never really goes away. I hated myself for doing this, but without the medication I so refused to take, I wasn’t strong enough. I wouldn’t admit that to others or myself, living in a lie was always easier. But tonight, I would allow myself to live in a fantasy.

·       Name: Jeon Wonwoo

·       Birth date: 1996. 07.17.

·       Height: 1,82 m

·       Siblings: Kim Mingyu, apparently they are both adopted

·       Job: Chauffeur of a business man

·       Places he’s frequently seen at: National library, Sunday Gym, Red Corner bookstore, various parks around his neighborhood, hiking trails around the forest, Soul BBQ, Sky Blue headquarters

·       Car: red Mercedes CLS class

·       Additional things I found about him: It seems like he has thirteen close friends, he lives with his adopted brother; but I couldn’t find the address anywhere. Surveillance cameras say that he usually goes to read in the park, by the river, and he drinks a lot of coffee. I’m pretty sure he wears glasses, but there’s few pictures of him wearing it. I’m sorry, Y/N, for some reason this is everything I could find about him. He’s got a clean record, and even the little information I gave you I could barely find. Something’s fishy, but maybe he really isn’t that interesting. I wouldn’t bother with someone like him. P.S. Don’t tell anyone I helped you gain information on him, they’ll fire me!

       The birds chirping were the first thing I heard as I woke up, then the hurried knocks on my door. I groaned loudly, voice hoarse from having just woken up, and the knocking stopped.

“Get up, it’s almost 9 am!” Doyoung’s voice called from the other side of the door and I sighed, burying my head in my pillow, “I’m heading in to work later. I can drive you to wherever you want to go, if you want me to.”

That definitely got my attention as I raised my head, “Okay!”

I cleared my throat and jumped up into a seated position, looking around my bed. Printed pictures lingered scattered around the blanket and my laptop was on the verge of falling off, so I grabbed it and got out of bed. I walked to my desk and placed it on top of it, leaning against the edge of the glass. I looked down at the pictures that were on my bed and decided, that I would do this. I stayed up until late night to research myself as much as I could about Wonwoo, but he had no social media. I found a few yearbook photos of him, but they didn’t help with much. Mark was right, he seemed to be a very boring person…he almost felt like a ghost, like his real identity was buried deep down. And that was exciting, so, if Doyoung had already offered to give me a lift, I could just head to the Red Corner bookstore and check it out for myself. Hopefully, Wonwoo would be there. I still don’t know his schedule, but if I start lurking around the places Mark told me about, I can very easily follow Wonwoo around once he shows up.

After having breakfast with Doyoung, we both got dressed and I gave him instructions to the Red Corner bookstore and we were off, rolling down the busy streets of the city. My fingers were tapping against my knees in excitement as I tried to stay still, trying not to alert Doyoung that I was feeling excited about something. But he was my brother, and he noticed.

“I didn’t know going to a bookstore could make you excited.” He raised an eyebrow and I chuckled, shaking my head.

“It’s not that, I’m just in a good mood!” I tried to lie, but Doyoung just shook his head; I knew he didn’t believe me.

“So…now you suddenly like to read?” He asked with a teasing grin and I scoffed, turning to look at him.

“What do you mean?” I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms in front of my chest, “I always liked to read!”

“Fashion magazines, maybe.” I huffed and it made Doyoung laugh as he drove through an intersection. Once Doyoung was done laughing, he cleared his throat and briefly glanced at me.

“You wouldn’t be so excited about books unless you’re stalking someone.” I failed to pick up on the playfulness in his voice, the way he bit his lower lip to try and stay serious. My heart started suddenly beating really fast and my grip tightened around the seatbelt, my whole body became tense. How did he realize? Did he walk inside my room while I was sleeping? Was it something in my words that gave it away? Did I get worse at hiding my feelings? I could feel Doyoung’s gaze on me, but I couldn’t move out of fear. I was scared of what was coming next and ashamed. But then, Doyoung gasped and I had to look at him.

“I’m sorry!” He exclaimed, panic lacing his words, and I became confused, “I didn’t mean to say that—I—I worded that so badly, Y/N—”

“Oh,” I chuckled, trying to collect myself, “No, it was a joke! I totally get it!”

I couldn’t believe I almost gave myself away. He had no idea; he was just teasing me! I chuckled again, feeling at ease as I turned to look at Doyoung again. “Seriously, I totally got your joke!”

“I’m still sorry—” My laughter interrupted Doyoung and he just shook his head, still looking guilty.

“I could become an actress if my reaction made you react like this.” But in truth, my reaction was genuine and I was so thankful that Doyoung didn’t realize that. He could read people very easily, but maybe as he was driving he couldn’t focus fully, which was great for me. Doyoung sighed and he pulled up to the sidewalk, looking at the Red Corner bookstore, which was just across the road. I smiled and unbuckled the seatbelt; I pressed a kiss against Doyoung’s cheek then got out. He offered me a small wave before driving away. I took a deep breath and smiled, looking around the street. It didn’t look like a very busy neighborhood; a few people were walking here and there. To my right there were many narrow alleys that lead to the main road, and I took off down the street. Why would Wonwoo come to a bookstore in this side of the city if he could go to the big one at the mall? Wonderingly, I crossed the street and carefully approached the bookstore. It wasn’t open yet, so I figured I could go to the coffee shop I saw while Doyoung drove us here. The bookstore would only open in half an hour, I still had time. I walked down the street with a skip in my steps, smiling widely. I had a feeling today was going to be a successful day, but for that I needed Mark to leave me alone. I was hoping he wouldn’t get a new case for at least a week, the potentiality of following Wonwoo around without him knowing had me in a very good mood. Sleeping on the choices I took yesterday definitely did well, I wasn’t feeling as bad about as I was yesterday. Yes, it was still wrong what I was doing, but as long as no one got harmed, it wasn’t something very bad!

I entered the coffee shop and walked to the front desk, ordering my usual drink of choice. When it was done, I walked to a table and took a seat, it was by the window, and took a sip of the Caramel Macchiato. I watched the people who passed by and took another sip, relaxing in the chair, feeling content. The melody playing in the shop was pleasant and I bobbed my head to the rhythm. The bell chimed and I watched the beautiful girl that walked in, her hair was dark brown and wavy. She had bangs and she was tall, definitely a beauty.

You could follow her too, she’s your type. If Wonwoo backfires, you have an alternative.

I almost laughed out loud at the words whispered to me by the dark voices, feeling truly entertained. It was so easy to find someone, like I said, it could be literally anyone. If I found them attractive, nothing was stopping me from stalking them. But I shook my head, took another sip of the drink, and ignored the voices. I wouldn’t let them take full control over me. And as the beautiful girl waited at the front desk, my back straightened as a very familiar red Mercedes came into view. It was Wonwoo’s car. My heart started thumping quickly and for a second I didn’t know what do to, so I relaxed into the seat, trying to stay low-key. The beautiful girl saw my sudden reaction and she looked at me concerned, but I just smiled at her, trying to show her that I was fine. When she turned her back on me, I grabbed my phone and quickly went to the camera, snapping a picture through the window. Wonwoo couldn’t be seen, all windows of the car were tinted, but he didn’t get out. I quickly locked my phone when I heard the heels of the girl getting closer as she walked by me and I waited patiently until she was out of the shop before I sprung onto my feet. My knees accidentally knocked into the table and it took the barista off guard, I hurriedly went up to her and handed back the now empty glass, thanking her for her services. She gave me a funny look but I ignored her as I almost ran out of the coffee shop.

“Bye!” I called to her with a wave before exiting, and stopped for a second, taking a deep breath. Wonwoo’s car was still there, but I didn’t know if he was in there or not, so walking up to it would have been too risky.

Oh, here comes the fun we’ve been all missing.

My whole body was shaking in excitement as I thought of my next move, deciding to walk by the bookstore. I could peek inside and see if Wonwoo was in there or not, the windows were big enough to see everything from the outside. So, I started moving, fingers tapping against my palm anxiously, heart thumping wildly. This was always exciting, but also nerve wrecking. I had to move without being seen…or recognized. But, I was sure Wonwoo had already forgotten my face, I was just an ordinary, clumsy girl who almost spilled her coffee on him.

No, the image of your face has been forever printed into his mind, Y/N. He’s watching you, just like you are watching him.

I stopped walking, the woman behind me almost ran into me as she was taken off by my sudden lack of movement. She gave me a glare, but I ignored her. I was right in front of the bookstore and my heart was beating even faster. What did the voices mean? Does Wonwoo know that I’m stalking him? That can’t possibly be true…why would he…

Are you the only person that stalks in this world?

I shook my head and closed my eyes for a second, trying to block the voices. The thought of that creeped me out and I didn’t want to think about being possibly stalked. Then I mustered the courage and looked inside, seeing two girls at the front desk. No trace of Wonwoo, however, as I looked around the place. Not wanting to draw too much attention to myself, I walked by and rounded the corner, leaning against the red cobblestone wall. Well, if Wonwoo wasn’t inside, he must still be in his car. Which is bad, because Doyoung drove me here. I didn’t think I’d have success on my first day of keeping my eyes on him, so I didn’t find coming with a car necessary. But now, I regretted my decision. With a sigh, I took my phone in my hand and was about to search for a cab, but then I heard laughter. Deep laughter. Coming from around the corner. My heart skipped a beat as I peeked around the corner, he was standing there. Wearing light blue jeans and a turtleneck, his dark hair in his eyes and round glasses sitting high up on the bridge of his nose. I quietly exhaled, taken by the sight in front of me. Wonwoo laughed again, his voice was still deep, his laughter was short but warm. The way his lips pulled up into a huge smile it melted away the cold expression I’ve seen him have in the pictures I found of him. His eyes didn’t look as menacing anymore. Not even realizing that I was doing it, I snapped a few pictures, hopeful that I caught his smiling face. But he was with the beautiful girl, and she was touching his arm. So then does Wonwoo have a girlfriend? And it’s the beautiful girl from the coffee shop? It isn’t impossible.

You could have both…or you could get rid of one…

“Shut up!” I hissed, and quickly ducked back behind the red cobblestone wall, scared that they heard me. They were a good distance away, and there was noise on the street, but I could never be too sure. I hated the dark voices, especially when they suggested getting rid of someone. I could never do it; I didn’t want to. I would go too low, I would disappoint Doyoung so much. If I killed someone, he’d be the one putting me behind bars. I didn’t want to see the pain on his face, pain I caused for him. I didn’t want him to suffer or worry for me anymore, he’s had enough of it while we were still young kids.

The slamming of the bookstore door snapped me out of my thoughts and nervously, I peeked around the corner again, seeing Wonwoo walking away. He was headed towards his car, so I didn’t bother following him at first, but when he went past it without getting in, I grinned. He wasn’t leaving just yet, that means I can follow him around! Fixing my hair and keeping my phone in my hand for comfort, I took off after Wonwoo, keeping a safe distance between us.

And I had a very successful day. Wonwoo stayed in the neighborhood for three hours, just walking around. I snapped plenty of pictures of him, ones I would have to copy on my laptop the second I got home and delete them off my phone. He did go and had breakfast at a tiny local restaurant, which had amazing food by the way. They had some traditional cake that I haven’t eaten before, and I made a mental note to return there from time to time. Maybe with Doyoung, he’s always had a sweet tooth. Then Wonwoo went for a short walk in the park, before he went back to the bookstore. He came out with a book and then went behind the bookstore, to a playground, sat underneath a big willow tree and read. For two hours, he didn’t move from there. His hair was moved by the breeze from time to time, his lips pursed sometimes, and eyebrows furrowed every once in a while. His glasses kept falling off and he had to push them up every five minutes. I’m assuming when something was interesting or tense, he’d bite his lip or thumb, eyes running over quickly the words on the white pages. I took a picture and I was able to see the title of the book, ‘I’ll be gone in the dark’. So, he was into crime books, I looked up and smiled in his direction. He just became more and more mysterious. I was aching to know who he truly was, what he truly liked, I was yearning to hear his beautiful laughter again. And as if Wonwoo finally noticed that someone was watching him, he looked up. And he looked at me. We made eye contact, my heart started beating like crazy, my hands shook.

What will you do now Y/N? Isn’t this just thrilling?

But suddenly a tap on my knee made me jump. I looked down confused and saw a little boy grinning up at me. My eyebrows rose as I watched him; he had his hands behind his back.

“Hello?” I asked confused, glancing around to see if he was with anyone. A couple elderly people were by the entrance of the playground, chatting. He was probably with one of them.

“Hi!” The boy said shyly and I offered him a warm smile.

“Can I help you? Are you lost?” I asked him, making sure that he wasn’t here alone.

“No.” He shook his head with a chuckle, then looked down. I chuckled and looked at him confused; he was shifting his weight from one leg to another.

“You’ve been sitting here for a long time,” He suddenly said as he looked back at me, “Aren’t you cold?”

I didn’t know how to answer him, he took me off guard. What was a little boy doing, talking to a stranger?

“My jacket is thick, I’m not cold—”

“Do you like that man?” When the little boy suddenly pointed at Wonwoo, my heart jumped into my throat. I was praying he wasn’t looking my way anymore, and thankfully; he wasn’t. Actually, he was gone. Disappointment settled in and my eyebrows furrowed as I looked around, trying to spot him.

“He’s gone.” I whispered, standing up abruptly. My legs were sore, my ass actually hurt. I should have moved around, not sat there unmoving for two hours straight.

“This is for you.” The little boy chuckled and I looked back down at him; he was holding a little white flower. I took it from him confused, but he just grinned at me and then ran off. What a strange encounter that was. But after that, I went back to the bookstore, and Wonwoo’s car was gone. He had left. That meant I was done for the day, he could’ve been anywhere, and I was actually really cold. So, I called a cab and went home, changed and then went for a long run. I needed to clear my mind, block the voices that were so violently trying to dictate me my next move. I wouldn’t let them rule over me, I was the one in charge of myself and my actions.

After I got home, I showered and cooked some dinner, then I sat in the living room with the TV on as I copied all the pictures I took of Wonwoo onto my laptop. My cheeks felt warm as I looked at them again. I printed two, one where Wonwoo was smiling and one while he was sitting underneath the tree. The breeze had picked up and his hair was blown all around, he was pushing up his glasses, his lips in a tight line. The pictured offered me calmness and as I was looking at it, the front door got unlocked. Franticly, I closed my laptop and threw the two pictures into the folder I was using to store everything I had on Wonwoo. Doyoung looked tired as he walked inside and I was standing very awkwardly in the middle of the living room.

“Hi!” I called out loudly and he looked up, taken aback by my presence there.

“Uh, hi.” He greeted back, giving me a questioning look but I just giggled.

“I cooked dinner!” I tried to diffuse the awkwardness and Doyoung started grinning.

“Thank God, I didn’t have lunch today, I’m starving!” He said as he pushed his shoes off.

“It’s important to have lunch.” I said as I walked to the fridge, taking out the food I had prepared.

“Yeah, but according to Sana, so is raiding the Sky-Blue headquarters.” Doyoung said defeated and my eyebrows furrowed. Where have I heard that name before?

“Why? What’s there?” I asked curiously as Doyoung took off towards his room.

“The mafia Sana is sniffing around.” And with that he went inside his room to change and come to have dinner. But the report from Mark said that Wonwoo frequents that place often. Why? Does he maybe know there’s a mafia inside there? Or is he oblivious to it?

And you thought he was boring? Aren’t things getting more and more interesting?

“How was your day?” I slammed the plates on the table and it made Doyoung wince. I gave him an apologetic grin as I placed two forks and some napkins too next to the plates.

“Uneventful,” I said with a sigh, going to the living room to grab my stuff, “I’ll be right back, I’ll just put these in my room.”

Doyoung hummed as he took a seat at the table, placing food on his plate. I hurried to my room, clutching the file tightly to make sure it wouldn’t open and free its contents onto the floor as I carried the laptop in my other hand. I entered my room and went towards my desk, placing my laptop on top of it. The file I placed on a shelf of my bookcase and as I was about to leave I noticed how the temperature was a bit colder than in the other rooms. Looking around, I noticed my window was slightly open and with a sigh, I went and closed it and locked it. It wasn’t unlike me to forget to close it back if I happened to open it up. And just as I turned around to leave the room for good, my eyes stopped on my nightstand. Five white lilies were placed in a tall glass with water. I remained rooted to the spot, warmness spreading in my chest. It’s been long since I got flowers from someone. How did Doyoung get these in here without me noticing the flowers when he got inside the house? I chuckled and shook my head as I went to have dinner, stomach churning loudly. It felt nice to get flowers. Even if they were from my brother.

           I should have taken Mark’s offer and went on that vacation he proposed, but my mind wouldn’t let me do that. I had a new mission, and it was following Wonwoo around. For a whole week I was vigilant enough that he didn’t notice me and now I knew his habits. In the mornings, he’d take that beautiful girl to the bookstore and then go buy himself coffee. Sometimes he’d go back to that park and read for a few hours, other times he’d leave and go to the gym. He would spend a lot of time at the Sky-Blue headquarters and drive his boss to less or more sketchy places. His boss was Kim Mingyu, it crossed my mind to research him too and follow him around for a day or two, but he was giving me bad vibes. When I trailed after Wonwoo’s car when he was with Mingyu, I felt like the two knew I was there. Sometimes, they’d drive around in the same neighborhood twice and I would have to take different turns in order to make it seem like I wasn’t following them…but it almost always led me to lose them. After Wonwoo was done with his work, he’d go to the national library and spend hours there, so much, that I was starting to worry that he’d fall ill from not eating and drinking enough. In fact, he barely ate anything all day, maybe he did it somehow when I wasn’t watching, otherwise I can’t explain how he remained energetic and standing for the whole day. On the third day of watching him, I decided to enter the library myself and try and find a book that I would enjoy. He switched from the book he was reading to a different one, in fact, every day he read something different. It was confusing, and I was dying to ask him why…but the right moment hadn’t come for it yet. One day, I got so immersed in my own book that I totally forgot about keeping my eyes on Wonwoo too and when I looked up from my book, Wonwoo was gone from his usual spot. I looked around a little too frantically, my knees bouncing fast. I waited for two more minutes before I sprung up onto my feet and took off towards the section I took the book I was reading from. I heard hushed laughter coming from nearby but I was busy trying push the book back in its place, so busy, that I totally missed the deep tone of the laughter. When I finally had the book in its original place, I turned and took off pretty much running, which led me into stumbling forward as my shoes got caught in the carpet. I gasped and ran into the bookshelves in front of me, barely catching myself from falling.

“Are you alright?” A feminine voice asked, and as I turned to answer them, my heart stopped beating. The woman was standing next to Wonwoo and they were both looking at me confused and concerned. I gulped and suddenly my throat was dry as my eyes jumped from the woman to Wonwoo and then back at the woman and then again to Wonwoo. I was waiting for him to point at me and yell that I’m a psycho stalker, but he just looked confused and I quietly sighed.

“Yeah, sorry!” I said awkwardly and bowed my head quickly before turning around and running away embarrassed. It was good that Wonwoo had no recollection of my face, it means that he didn’t pay much attention to me at the Coffee Shop and he also didn’t know that I was pretty much stalking him. As much as stalking Wonwoo made my week better and definitely uplifted my mood, the highlight of my week were the daily white lilies I was finding in my room each evening. I didn’t know how Doyoung was doing it, I could swear I saw him enter empty handed each evening, but maybe he was turning into a magician and was trying his tricks out on me. I didn’t say anything to him, wanting to act oblivious to his nice act if he wouldn’t say something first. But I had my concerns regarding Wonwoo and the relationship between him and the beautiful girl from the bookstore. She worked there and seeing them each morning together gave me the impression that they were on really good terms…possibly even dating, even though I’ve only seen them hugging. So, for that, to check it myself, I had a plan. I bought a copy of the book I saw Wonwoo reading in the park and one morning, on a Tuesday when I knew Wonwoo wouldn’t be the one giving a lift to the beautiful girl, I headed inside the bookstore.

The bell chimed loudly and it was warm inside. The radio was playing through the speakers at a low volume and the girl I was here for was at the front desk. My eyes fell on her and I noticed how she hasn’t had curly hair ever since that day I saw her in the Coffee Shop. She was concentrated on her phone, smiling as she typed quickly. I cleared my throat and walked up to the front desk, leaning against it. It took her a second to realize that someone was standing there, looking at her.

“Oh, hi!” She had a powerful voice; it didn’t take one long to realize she was a confident person. I smiled at her kindly and tapped my fingers against the counter.

“Hi…” I looked around quickly, feigning nervousness, “I’m sorry to bother you here…”

Then I looked at her name tag and read her name, “Hyemi, pretty name! Anyways…uhm, this book…”

I grabbed it out of my bag and placed it on top of the counter, “Wonwoo borrowed it to me and well…I’ve had it for too long and I want to return it.”

“Oh, you know Wonwoo?” Hyemi’s eyebrows rose as she took the book from me and looked at it, “I’ve seen this one laying around in his house.”

Oh, so she knows where Wonwoo lives. And she was there too. You knew this was coming, Y/N, but are you ready to face the consequences? What if you have to give up both? You can always get rid of one of them…you know it’s not hard…

“I’ve met him at the library, sometimes we talk,” I said with a shrug and took the book back from Hyemi, “he recommended it to me.”

I was hoping she didn’t see the tightness of my jaw as I tried to ignore the evil voices. They were urging me to grab the girl by the hair and drag her away. I couldn’t do that; I wasn’t like that anymore. And nothing was sure yet. They can be friends; friends hang out together in their apartments all the time. I can’t jump to conclusions just yet. And I’ve never seen Wonwoo spend time with her except for when he drops Hyemi off in the mornings.

“He really likes doing that!” Hyemi said with a roll of her eyes and I chuckled, putting the book away.

“He does, but it’s fine, I don’t mind.” She hummed and we looked behind her when there was a click. Another breathtakingly beautiful woman walked into the room and I couldn’t help but gape at her. Her lips were red and her long brown hair was in a low ponytail, eyeliner on her eyelids. She looked amazing, I cleared my throat and quickly read her name tag. Irene.

“Everything alright?” She asked with authority in her voice and I found myself nodding very quickly, but Hyemi just chuckled.

“Yes, I was just talking to—” Then both women looked at me and I was lost for a second, feeling flustered. My fingers tapped against the counter quickly and I realized they were waiting for me to tell them my name.

“Y/N!” I exclaimed and my cheeks became warm, “Uhm, my name is Y/N.”

“Wonwoo borrowed Y/N a book and she wants to return it.” Hyemi said with a smile and Irene hummed, looking me over quickly. Then she offered me a small smile and her stern expression melted away. It eased my nerves a little and I offered her a similar smile.

“Right, so…could you give me his address?” I asked, very innocently, as I looked Hyemi in the eyes. She knows where Wonwoo lives, I’m a little bothered by that but at least now I’ll find out his address too. But her eyebrows furrowed and she looked at me apologetically.

“Sorry, I don’t think I should just tell you that…without Wonwoo’s consent at least—”

“Oh, right!” I exclaimed and looked down embarrassed, “That was really…a dumb request, don’t worry! I totally get it!”

“Not to be mean—”

“No! It’s fine, you’re right!” I waved my hands in the air and Irene chuckled as she watched the exchange between us. I took a step back and played with my fingers as I tried to keep on an embarrassed expression.

“I’ll give it back to him when I meet him at the library.”

“Are you sure? You could give it to me and I’ll—”

“I’m sure.” I interrupted Hyemi and walked backwards towards the door, “Have a nice day, ladies!”

“You too!” Irene called out as Hyemi’s eyebrows furrowed a little bit.

“Bye.” She muttered as I hurried out the door, heart beating fast. What if she realized I was lying? Now all I could hope for was that she wouldn’t tell Wonwoo and throw me off from the progress I’ve been making.

And that day when I arrived home, I found more white lilies sitting on the little table that we had on the front porch. I took them and inhaled their scent, a smile appearing on my lips. And as a breeze passed by, I felt eyes on me. So, I straightened up and looked around, but the fence was high enough that no one would see inside, so I shook the feeling off and unlocked the front door, walking inside the house and headed to the kitchen to take a vase for the new lilies.

           A few days passed since I’ve been to the bookstore and I had realized that I needed a different approach. Yesterday, Hyemi and Wonwoo didn’t show up to the bookstore and as I went on with my day, I found Wonwoo nowhere he’d usually be at. I didn’t want to jump to conclusions, so, I figured they must have taken a day off. But that thought didn’t sit well with me, so, I decided that it was time I took serious actions. A more straightforward approach. One that would set off the start of something between Wonwoo and I.

I woke up a little earlier than I usually would to be able to get ready. We had only one bathroom, and for once, I put a little effort into my appearance. I usually didn’t doll myself up, but today I wanted to look pretty. So, I put on minimal makeup and decided to be a bit bold and use red lipstick too. I pulled my hair out of my face and clipped the front strands back and then I cooked breakfast for Doyoung and I, wanting to surprise him. He was always the one that got up early and made sure we ate well, but I felt like returning this little favor to him since he’s been bringing me white lilies for almost two weeks now. I even turned his morning alarm off, wanting to give him a little extra time to sleep, which was always welcomed as he worked late and had to wake up really early. After breakfast was ready, I went back to my room to get dressed and spent at least ten minutes thinking of an outfit. In the end, I settled on high waist mom jeans and a long-sleeved colorful crop top as yesterday it was rather warm. Then, I grabbed my bag and went to Doyoung’s room to wake him up. He was in a good mood once I told him I cooked breakfast and that I let him sleep in, his laughter echoed in the house as he told me a funny story that happened at work. Breakfast was pleasant and tasty and once we were done, I didn’t wait for Doyoung, I headed out. I told him that I found a new path in the forest that lead to a beautiful clearing with a spring and that I wanted to take pictures while the sun wasn’t high up in the sky, which unfortunately was a lie. I did find a place like that, but it was last month and I had already taken plenty of pictures of it. But Doyoung didn’t have to know that I was back to stalking again, especially not today, when I was so excited about my plan. Before going to the library, I grabbed a cup of coffee, Americano this time as I didn’t have in mind drinking it and it would’ve been a waste to buy Caramel Macchiato. By the time I got to the library it was nearing noon and I was hopeful that wherever Wonwoo went, he’d be back by today, otherwise, I did all of this for nothing. When I entered, the librarian gave me a glance and her eyebrows furrowed as they fell on my coffee, but I hid it behind my back and offered her a warm smile. She shook her head but didn’t say anything and I bowed my head, hurrying further inside. The coffee wasn’t hot anymore, but it was still warm, at least it wouldn’t burn him. I cleared my throat and took in a deep breath, about to round the corner and head to the reading area. My heart was pounding quickly in my chest and I feared that others would be able to hear it in the calming silence of the library. But as I rounded the corner, my mind went blank.

There he is.

I could feel excitement enter my whole body and my fingers started tapping quickly against the cup of coffee I was holding, I had to force myself to stay as still as I could and not take off towards Wonwoo. He was sitting at his usual spot, in the middle of the area and at the edge of the table. He had a book on the table in front of him, his glasses were close to falling off and his black hair was a bit messy. He was wearing a black t-shirt and a silver necklace hung around his neck. My eyes got glued to his muscly arms as he flipped the page and I gulped, trying to focus on my plan once again.

He is a sight for sore eyes, isn’t he, Y/N? No surprise you can’t handle the thought of someone else having him.

I shook my head a little and then started walking. My heels clicked against the wooden floor, but it was a dull sound, and thankfully Wonwoo didn’t look up. His eyebrows were furrowed as his eyes ran over the words in the book, and he sighed loudly as I got closer and closer. I glanced around, but there weren’t many people, and those who were, they were too busy studying or reading. Knowing that no one was looking my way, I knew what I was about to do wouldn’t look suspicious to anyone. I was two tables away from Wonwoo, and as I was watching him so closely, I noticed the sudden tensity of his muscles. How his palms clenched into fists and it almost looked like he was reading the same thing over and over, but I wouldn’t be actually able to tell that. My plan was to accidentally run into the corner of the table he was sitting at and spill the coffee on him. Like that, I had an excuse to talk to him and hopefully he’d even agree to me buying him a new shirt. I wasn’t able to decipher his personality as he was mostly by himself, but I prayed to every God out there that he’d comply to my wishes. And just as my eyes fixated on the corner of the table, to make sure that the front of my shoe would get stuck in it, Wonwoo abruptly stood up. And I jumped and panicked. The sound his chair made was loud and I lost all train of thought as his eyes fell on me and the heel of my shoe got stuck in the edge of the carpet. And suddenly, I was falling forward, eyes widened in horror. Wonwoo didn’t even blink, he just stood there, looking almost taken aback. And then our bodies collided into each other, and I felt the warm coffee spill not just on his chest, but on my own too. I gasped loudly, Wonwoo remained silent and suddenly I felt the eyes of the people who were around us, on us. Wonwoo was tense as he quickly gripped my forearms to steady me, the empty cup of coffee fell against the ground and I felt like it made the loudest sound I have ever heard. But in reality, it barely even made a thudding sound. My eyes remained wide, heart beating fast as I remained rooted in Wonwoo’s arms.

He smells so good. And his body is so firm. Do you hear how loud his breathing is, Y/N?

The evil voice made me shiver and I sprung out of Wonwoo’s hold, looking at him wide eyed. He looked frozen for a second, but then he lowered his arms, and gulped, glancing down at his damp t-shirt.

“Oh my God,” I muttered, looking down at my own damp shirt, this didn’t go as planned, he was the only one supposed to get coffee spilled on, “I am so sorry!”

My voice was quiet as I tried not to disturb the other people in there and Wonwoo finally looked at me. His sharp eyes offered no warmness and suddenly I felt small under his intense gaze. I felt embarrassed and as if I was caught in the act, but it’s him who stood up. This was supposed to happen differently.

“At least it wasn’t burning hot.” Wonwoo’s deep voice reached my ears and I did everything I could to memorize the deep vibration of it.

“Yeah, I got it a while ago…” I mumbled and looked down embarrassed, unable to maintain his intense eye contact.

“Accidents happen,” I could see him shrug as he ran his hands down his abdomen, “And it’s my fault, I was the one who stood up so abruptly—”

“Oh, no—” I looked up and shook my hands quickly, “I shouldn’t have walked so close to the table, it’s really my fault—”

“Don’t worry about it,” His lips pulled into a small smirk and I knew I was going to blush, “I’m not mad at you.”

My cheeks were hot and I felt at a loss of words all of a sudden, almost forgetting why I even planned on doing this.

“I feel guilty though—” I managed to get out, trying to avoid looking at his lips, “Let me make up for it!”

Someone towards the back of the reading area cleared their throat and I realized I was starting to speak too loudly; my leg was tapping against the wooden floor anxiously. I wanted to insist, but I didn’t know what to say next. I needed Wonwoo to co-operate, but I wasn’t sure he would just yet. His expression didn’t give away anything and I bit my lower lip nervously.

“How can you make up for it?” His eyebrows rose and my heart jumped in my chest.

“Uhm, I—I can just, uh—buy you a new shirt?” I hated myself for stuttering, but this was more nerve wrecking than I remembered it being. Has it been really that long since I’ve done this?

“I have plenty of shirts…” Wonwoo’s deep voice made me look back at him and I tried to stay calm. I couldn’t decipher his expression, but he looked like he was teasing me. I smiled softly and played with my fingers, glancing away from him before looking back.

“The mall is literally across the road…and…if you let me buy you this shirt, you’ll never forget that a stranger spilled their coffee on you on a very nice Wednesday…” Suddenly, all tension left my body when a wide smile appeared on Wonwoo’s lips. For the first time, I noticed how his nose scrunched up when he smiled, and how soft he seemed like this. When Wonwoo smiled, he wasn’t intimidating anymore, it was as if I was looking at a different person. My heart started beating quickly again and I felt at peace as I gaped at him, hopeful that he didn’t find it creepy. If only he knew…

“You might need a new shirt as well…” Wonwoo said once he was done laughing and I looked down at my shirt, eyebrows furrowing. Well yeah…that wasn’t part of the plan.

“If you insist.” I said with a shrug and Wonwoo chuckled, shaking his head.

“I’ll put this book back and then we can go.” Wonwoo said as he closed the book he was reading and picked it up from the table. He gave me a glance before he turned and walked towards the tall bookshelves, disappearing between them. I bit my lower lip, trying to contain my victorious smirk in case Wonwoo returned. I remembered the abandoned cup and turned around to pick it up, chuckling to myself. My plan didn’t work, but worked at the same time. It played out a little different than what I had in mind, but in the end, I still got what I wanted.

“Let’s go?” I turned my head and Wonwoo was by my side, eyebrows raised as his eyes fell on the empty cup. I nodded my head and we took off towards the mall from across the road, about to buy some new shirts.

Once we got to the mall I made Wonwoo choose a shop he likes and I’d buy him a t-shirt from there, only if he likes it, of course. In the end, he lead us to the cheapest shop and said that I should choose something for myself as well and he’ll buy it, because it was his fault too that the coffee was spilled as he got in my way. When he pointed towards the shop and said that he wanted to choose from that one, I gave him a look.

“Are you sure?” I asked as I followed after him, “Because I might look poor, but I’m not. So, if you want to wear something fancy, I totally can get it for you—”

“I don’t need anything fancy.” Wonwoo interrupted with a chuckle and I shrugged, walking inside the shop.

“Well, good for you then.” I muttered, looking around. To the left was the men section and to the right the women section, I pointed towards the men section, “Let’s go.”

Without thinking, I grabbed his wrist and noticed how warm his skin was against mine. I didn’t realize it was inappropriate to hold someone you just met, let alone drag him after you. But I was too happy that my plan actually worked out and that he didn’t recognize me at all. Even though he’s seen me twice before.

What if you aren’t remarkable enough? You could get Hyemi instead of Wonwoo, since he doesn’t even remember your face.

I shook my head and stopped in front of racks of various colored t-shirt and simple shirts, “Well, choose one!”

Wonwoo came to stand next to me and his eyebrows furrowed a little bit as he started moving the racks with his left hand. My right leg was tapping against the ground as I looked at his profile. His jaw was sharp and lips jutting out as he tried to choose one. Suddenly, I became aware of the hold I had on his wrist still and released it, clearing my throat awkwardly. I crossed my arms in front of my chest and looked ahead when Wonwoo glanced at me. I could feel my cheeks burning in embarrassment, but from the corner of my eyes I could see him smirking. It made my leg tap faster against the floor and I wished that something would happen that would save me from the embarrassment I was currently feeling.

“This one will do.” He suddenly spoke up, as if he could read my thoughts, and I turned to look at him. He was holding an almost identic t-shirt to the one he was wearing, except this one had longer sleeves. My eyes lingered on it before I gave him an affirming nod, and Wonwoo smiled.

“Your turn.” This time, he grabbed my wrist and started pulling me towards the women section. My heart suddenly picked up its pace and my free hand turned into a fist as I tried to contain my wide grin once again. His grip felt like it was on fire and burned away on my skin, but I was enjoying it, it was a nice feeling. He released me though the second we got to the shirts and I didn’t even look, just picked up a brown see through shirt.

“This one!” I exclaimed and grinned at Wonwoo, holding up the shirt. His eyes fell on it and his eyebrows furrowed.

“Are you sure?” He asked and I could almost hear a certain discomfort in his tone, but I thought I was just making things up. So, I just nodded my head with a wide smile and Wonwoo sighed, pointing towards the changing rooms.

“Let’s change then.”

“Shouldn’t we pay first?” I asked surprised as Wonwoo took off.

“No, take the tag off, we can still pay.” My eyebrows furrowed at Wonwoo’s words but I didn’t say anything as I went inside a cabin and quickly changed into the shirt I picked. Once I was dressed, I gulped. Well, I certainly should have looked first at what I was picking out, you could see my black bra through the material. And it was a bit too thin for this weather, but if we stayed inside the mall for longer I wouldn’t be bothered. And my car was around the corner, hopefully I wouldn’t catch a cold. I pulled the curtain back and my eyes fell on Wonwoo who was leaning against the wall casually. He was wearing black jeans and black combat boots. The t-shirt he picked was tight around his chest and I couldn’t look away. It was a mouthwatering sight and I gulped, snapping out of it. But the silence stretched on for longer as Wonwoo continued looking at me with an unreadable expression, jaw just a little tight. He kept his eyes on my face, but I didn’t miss the split second they lowered towards my see-through shirt. It made me fidget as I cleared my throat.

“Let’s—let’s pay!” I quickly hurried past Wonwoo, feeling embarrassed for the nth time today. I could hear a deep chuckle behind me, but I ignored it and approached the front desk.

“Hi, we bought these two shirts we are wearing, the tags are here—” I started speaking as I placed the tags on the counter.

“I’m sorry Miss, that’s against the rules.” The cashier very rudely interrupted and gave me a glare.

“Uhm…we still intend to pay though…”

“It’s still against the rules to do that, I have to call security—”

“Maybe you should just scan the tags and proceed on with your life, Kelly.” Wonwoo’s deep voice boomed next to me and I looked at him, his jaw was clenched and he was glaring at the cashier, whose name was Kelly. She seemed to shrink a little under Wonwoo’s gaze and she hesitated for a second, but then scanned in the tags.

“We are paying separately.” Wonwoo proceeded to say when he saw that she put the shirts on the same bill and Kelly apologized quickly. I looked at Wonwoo, eyebrows furrowed at the sudden change in his attitude. He looked stern and demanding, I probably would’ve done instantly what he told me, if he looked at me like that. This is how I imagined Wonwoo’s personality to be like, yet it didn’t sit well with me. Something felt off about his attitude, this wasn’t the first time he was being like this. And it was very obvious that he knew what effect it would have on the one targeted.

“Here.” The girl muttered once she handed Wonwoo the change back and then it was my turn to pay, which went by quickly as both of us were trying to move quickly under Wonwoo’s scrutinizing gaze.

“Uh, bye!” I called out as Wonwoo and I walked out with a bag each and our stained shirts inside them. I stopped walking once we were out of the shop and Wonwoo stopped too, looking back at me confused.

“Something wrong?” He asked confused and I shook my head.

“Not at all…I’m just glad we are even now…” I shrugged and he nodded with a hum, looking around. I tried to shrug off the sudden uncertainty I was feeling. Wonwoo didn’t seem as safe anymore as I had imagined him to be.

“Do you want to grab some lunch?” My heart jumped into my throat instantly and my mind went blank. How do I answer that question? That was definitely not what I had planned, but it was turning even better. But I couldn’t, I felt like it would be too much. Yes, I wanted to get to know him, but I already felt like an intruder. This happened only because of me, I didn’t want Wonwoo to feel like he had to do this. And I wanted to sort out my thought first and analyze our interaction.

“I would love to, but I have to help out my brother.” I lied through my teeth, with a smile on my face.

“Ah…” He nodded and neared me, I felt small under his strong gaze. It looked like he was looking right into my soul, reading my mind. It gave me the impression that he knew I was lying, “You don’t have to feel guilty for spilling the coffee on me, I told you, accidents happen.”

“I know!” I laughed nervously, my leg tapping against the ground once again, “I feel like I should wash that t-shirt…to actually stop feeling guilty…”

And that was the second stage of my plan. Get him to give me his t-shirt so that I can wash it, that way I get his phone number and I have an excuse to meet up with him again. Wonwoo’s eyebrows rose at my words and he chuckled, reaching inside his bag for without saying anything.

“Here.” He said and handed me his stained t-shirt.

“Really?” I asked gaping and he chuckled as I took it from him, “I thought you’d be against it…”

“I’m not,” He said with a casual shrug and then fished his phone out of his pocket, “I’ll need your number in order to get back my t-shirt…unless you’re a t-shirt thief.”

I started laughing as I took his unlocked phone and typed in my phone number, trying to hide the tremble of my fingers, “Shhh, no one knows.”

I winked as I handed him back his phone with my number saved and Wonwoo chuckled, ringing me. That way I had his number too, which I would save the second I got to my car. And then, he took another step and I was taken aback by the closeness between us.

“Tell me…” He muttered, his voice deep and I gulped nervously, “Have we met before?”

He knows, Y/N.

I froze up for a second, looking at him with my jaw having fallen open, “What? I—I don’t think—where—You know, maybe at the library—No! We have never met before!”

I knew I fucked up with my stuttering and the way Wonwoo suddenly started smirking like he was proud of himself for making me react like that. Maybe he really does know and the voices aren’t wrong.

“You go to the library often?”

“Lately, yeah.” I cleared my throat and stepped back, acting like I was looking at the shop behind Wonwoo.

“I see.” He nodded and then stepped back too, holding his hand out, “We haven’t introduced ourselves, I’m Wonwoo.”

My eyebrows rose as I realized we really didn’t, even though I already knew his name. Thank God it didn’t slip from my lips, that would’ve been really bad.

“I’m Y/N, nice to meet you!” I smiled at him widely and shook his head excited, trying to ignore how hot his hand was once again. His grip was firm and I decided to ignore how our hands touched for a little bit longer than they were supposed to.

“Nice to meet you too.” Wonwoo chuckled and we let go of each other’s hands finally.

“I have to go now…” I pointed behind me and Wonwoo gave me a nod and a small wave, “Bye!”

“See you soon, Y/N.” I shivered at how low his tone got and quickly hurried away, feeling embarrassed, excited, nervous and confused by the vibes he was giving me. Why is it that I feel like there’s something going on with him?

           I was eager to get home after the day I had, ready to get lost in my thoughts and analyze every little detail about the exchange between Wonwoo and I. I even considered texting him, but I didn’t want to come off as creepy, or give him the wrong impression. If I wanted things to work out, I had to be smooth and careful about everything I said and did. As I parked my car in its usual place, I noticed how the lights were on inside the house and realized Doyoung was already home. Doyoung was home early! I quickly got out of the car and locked it, almost running to get inside the house faster. It was rare that Doyoung was home before nightfall and I missed spending time with him and going out with him. We haven’t gone on a run together in a long time and I was hoping that Doyoung was up to it. I knocked on the front door first to let Doyoung know that it was me, and then pushed the door open and walked inside.

“Doyoung!” I shrieked, seeing that he wasn’t in the living room nor kitchen, “Hi!”

Doyoung didn’t answer right away and as I closed the door behind me and locked it, I heard the water running in the bathroom. Doyoung was washing up, so I walked to my room and changed out of my clothes and wore something comfortable. I quickly removed my makeup and sighed as I pulled my hair in a low bun, feeling at ease once again. I opened my window to let in some fresh air and as I was about to walk away, I noticed the white lilies on the windowsill. I chuckled at Doyoung’s creativeness and picked them up, taking them inside with me. It was smart of him, to be honest. He parked his car behind the backyard, where the wall of my bedroom was too. So, in order to get to the front of the house he’d have to pass by my windows and that would explain how he was able to sneak in the flowers inside my room without me seeing them. But as I held the lilies, I realized that there were ten pieces this time and I bit my lower lip as a wide smile spread onto my lips. I glanced at the bag that contained the shirts that got coffee spilled on them and I walked up to it, grabbing Wonwoo’s t-shirt. I took it in my hands and, having placed the lilies on my bed, and felt the soft fabric of the black t-shirt. It was bigger than my own torso as I held it against my frame and chuckled as I walked towards my mirror. So that’s what I would look like wearing Wonwoo’s shirts.

You look lovely, Y/N, we bet Wonwoo can’t wait to see you like this. If you proceed carefully, he’ll be yours in a blink of an eye.

I chuckled, letting the image the voices created linger in my mind. I brought the t-shirt up against my nose and reveled in Wonwoo’s cologne. It was masculine and it carried a musky scent and something that I have only felt on Doyoung, the smell of gunpowder. My eyebrows furrowed as I looked at the t-shirt, lowering it back inside the bag. Why would Wonwoo’s t-shirt smell like gunpowder? Does he go to the shooting ranges? Is it a hobby of his? No, if it was, I would’ve known already. But before I could dwell on it longer, the bathroom door closed and I jumped, taking the white lilies as I left my room.

“Y/N, are you home—”

“Doyoung!” I exclaimed and threw my arms around my brother, giving him a back hug. Doyoung chuckled and tapped my arms, softly peeling them off himself.

“I wasn’t expecting you to be home so early!” I said as I walked around him, wandering if we had any free vases for the lilies.

“I wasn’t either…” Doyoung muttered and I heard him sigh as I opened some cabinets until I found a blue vase. I smiled in victory and filled it with water, placing the lilies inside before putting the vase in the middle of the dining table. Doyoung was lounging on the couch with a frown on his face and as I looked at him, about to rant about my day, I realized something was wrong. He looked drained; his eyes even looked red.

“Doyoung…” I muttered with a frown and approached him slowly, arms hugging around my torso, “Are you okay?”

He looked up at me and tried to put on a smile, “Yeah! I’m fine—”

But his voice broke a little and I quickly sat next to him, throwing my arms around him as I pulled him into a tight hug.

“Hey, talk to me.” I whispered as I rubbed his back reassuringly. His arms went around me and he sighed loudly, sniffing.

“Well…I was sent home early because the higher ups are in meetings…” He sighed again and I just hummed as I waited patiently for him to continue.

“Sana was found dead this morning—” His voice broke again and I froze. Doyoung’s boss was dead? Who could have done such thing? And why?

“Oh, Doyoung, I’m so sorry…” I whispered, tightening my hold around him. He nodded his head and then rested his cheek against my shoulder. We remained silent as I tried offering comfort to my brother, knowing how much Sana’s death affected him. Not many liked Sana, sometimes even Doyoung hated her, but they spent a lot of time together. And inevitably they bonded, she still meant something to him.

“She was shot in the head once, it killed her instantly—” I wanted to tell him to stop thinking about it, to not tell me anything about her death, but he had to get it off his chest. And I was there to listen, I would always be there for Doyoung, no matter what he needed.

“There were signs of other altercations before her death…” Then he stopped for a second and scoffed, “She attacked a girl, Y/N, a simple, innocent, girl. She just—broke inside her apartment, trashed it and—and tried killing her? I don’t understand—”

“People do all sorts of things,” I interrupted Doyoung’s rambling, “You can never truly know what a person is capable of until it’s done.”

Doyoung sniffed again and then gently pulled back, rubbing his eyes. I let my hands rest in my lap as I watched my brother trying to pull himself together.

“She did it because of a guy—I don’t understand. She was obsessed with this—Kim Mingyu and she attacked Hyemi for being with him, I—” Doyoung shrugged and fell back against the couch, looking up at the white ceiling. My eyebrows furrowed as I watched my brother. Kim Mingyu? It’s the guy Wonwoo works for. Wait…does Wonwoo know anything about this? Why was he missing yesterday? Hyemi…it can’t be the girl from the bookstore, right?

“Is Hyemi alright?” I found myself asking quietly and Doyoung hummed.

“Her friends found her just in time, before she could get hurt seriously. But Sana…”

“She got what she deserved.” I couldn’t hold my words back and Doyoung’s head snapped in my direction, “She tried to kill Hyemi, Doyoung. And she was a cop. Attacked a simple civilian. I understand your pain and struggle but—”

“I know,” Doyoung offered me a reassuring smile and patted my hand, “but it’s very stressful. They want me to replace Sana.”

My eyes widened as I sat up straighter, “Wait…you’ll become head of police then…?”

Doyoung’s lips formed a thin line and he sighed, looking away from me, “I guess Kim Mingyu really does achieve whatever he wants…”

“Kim Mingyu?” My eyebrows furrowed as I looked at Doyoung once again confused hearing his name, “What does he have to do with this?”

“Nothing, don’t worry about that.” Doyoung quickly said and ran his fingers through his damp hair, “I just wanted to be the first one to tell you all of this, and not Mark.”

Before I could press more about who Kim Mingyu was, I froze and looked at Doyoung surprised, “Mark?”

“Yeah,” Doyoung gave me a small glare and it seemed like he was quick to repress the feelings towards Sana’s death, “I know about what you do with Mark.”

“I don’t do anything,” I shrugged defensively, “I don’t even know who that is!”

Doyoung scoffed and crossed his arms in front of his chest, “Please, you think people didn’t notice Mark’s sudden success this year? Everyone knew he was close to getting fired, until he suddenly turned into this super detective he never was—”

“And how is that my fault?!” I exclaimed, unable to keep it inside anymore. My legs were bouncing quickly and I gave Doyoung a glare, “I wanted to help. I wanted to do something else besides running my blog and taking pictures of nature, alright? This is fun and exciting—”

“And fucking dangerous, Y/N!” Doyoung exclaimed, standing up as his eyebrows furrowed, “Do you have any idea who you even follow around? Gang leaders, mafia heads, powerful business men! These people are shady! If you were ever caught, I wouldn’t have been able to do anything—”

“I know!” I exclaimed and stood up too, feeling desperate for Doyoung to understand me, “But this helped! It really did, Mark offered me an escape, Doyoung. An escape from falling back into my old habits and stalking people. Ever since I started doing this, I—I had no tendencies to stalk others—” Besides the sudden infatuation I had with Wonwoo, but it would pass. I hoped that it would. I wanted Doyoung to be proud of me.

“You just need a good therapist, Y/N—” Doyoung’s words were triggering as my parents would say this often to me and I couldn’t control myself, I shoved him back. He stumbled a bit, taken aback by my sudden outburst. Until he realized what he said, and he turned pale.

“Thanks a lot, big brother.” I snapped and turned around, storming towards my room, “You know therapists did shit and never helped me! The medication only made feel worse after a while!”

“I didn’t mean to say that, I’m sorry—” Doyoung tried to apologize as he followed after me.

“Save it, okay?!” I entered my room and blocked Doyoung from coming inside, “I—I know I’m a burden to you. I hate being a burden. But I can’t live on my own, and I hate that. I want to offer you a normal life, but instead, I’m just hanging on your neck—and I don’t need you to remind me that!”

“That’s not true!” Doyoung looked offended by my words as his eyebrows furrowed, “You were never a burden to me. I love you and I want you with me, Y/N—”

I raised my palm to stop him from talking, “Stop, I don’t care. Thankfully, helping Mark out pays well and I’m close to having enough money to move out. Give me three more months, and I’ll be gone.”

“What?!” Doyoung’s face fell and he went to grab me, but I slammed the door shut quickly, “I don’t want you to leave! We moved in here together because we both wanted to! You can’t just leave—”

“Watch me!” I screamed and I heard Doyoung sigh loudly as I crossed my arms in front of my chest. This wasn’t the time to act childish nor to drop something like that on him, not when his boss just died and he was in grief. But I couldn’t help it, he pissed me off. He would never understand what I had to go through daily and therefore he had no rights to try and tell me what to do. What Mark offered me was a life saver and Doyoung would never understand how much it helped, right up until I met Wonwoo.

“Y/N, I’m sorry.” Doyoung said loudly and knocked on my door, but I quickly locked it. I knew he was sorry and he didn’t want to hurt me, but I needed time to get over his words. By tomorrow morning I would be fine, but I needed to be left alone tonight.

“Whatever!” I called out and rolled my eyes, “Don’t bring me any white lilies anymore!”

I waited for an answer but Doyoung remained silent and I really wanted to see his expression, was he mad that I told him that?

“What?” My eyebrows furrowed at his confused tone, “You’re the one who buys them daily—”

The rest of his words got swallowed by my loudness. My heart started thumping wildly as I unlocked the bedroom’s door in a hurry and threw it open, “What?!”

Doyoung’s eyebrows were furrowed too as we looked at each other confused, “You…aren’t the one buying the lilies?”

“And it’s not you who’s been giving them to me?” Doyoung and I seemed to realize what this meant at the same time and as I scampered to shut the window of my room closed and lock it, Doyoung hurried to take on some shoes as he turned on the lights outside around the house. He threw on a jacket and hurried outside as I remained shivering in the middle of the room. Goosebumps covered my skin as I remained staring at the flowers on my nightstand that I got yesterday. Who was giving me these flowers then? And why was this person breaking inside our house?

Aw, does our little Y/N have a secret admirer? Who could it be?

“No!” I shook my head and hurriedly shut all blinds in my room and then went around the house, shutting each one of them. Doyoung came inside looking distressed and ran a hand through his hair.

“I’ll talk to the boys, and they’ll start patrolling around the neighborhood. Tomorrow a search team will come and search the house for any foreign DNA, alright?” Doyoung spoke with a serious tone as he locked the front door and turned to look at me, “Nothing will happen, alright?”

“They have been breaking in for two weeks, Doyoung—” I bit my lower lip and started tapping my leg against the floor anxiously, “Do they want something from me?”

Doyoung walked up to me and held onto my shoulders, “We’ll catch them before they can do anything, yes?”

I sighed and nodded my head, looking around the house to see the white lilies everywhere. They made me feel sick to my stomach, so I walked past Doyoung to take the trash bin and started throwing all of them inside it, cursing under my breath. I should have known that it wasn’t Doyoung. I’m so stupid!

           Sleeping was hard last night and after struggling for a while, I somehow fell asleep towards the morning hours. I didn’t have the energy to go and watch Wonwoo today, I was too paranoid to even wear headphones on my run. I kept glancing behind me, until I noticed the police car parked around the curb and two of Doyoung’s colleagues chatting as they had coffee in their hands. I quickly greeted them before running past them, deciding to change my running route out of fear that if someone indeed was watching would already know I would head that way and do something to me. Doyoung kept messaging me every half an hour and I got irritated so I told him to just watch the app where it showed him my location, and at least that made him stop. I was halfway down the path when my phone started buzzing in my back pocket, tickling my butt cheek. I stopped running and unzipped the pocket, taking my phone in my hand. My lungs were screaming for air and I had sweat a lot as I pushed myself in order to try and forget the whole stalker deal. But when my eyes fell on the caller ID, I felt excited.

“I hope you went on that vacation and enjoyed yourself,” Came Mark’s voice through the phone and I chuckled, still trying to catch my breath, “Because I’ve got a new job for you.”

I hummed and breathed loudly, waiting for Mark to continue.

“Am I…interrupting something?” His voice was hesitant and it made me laugh.

“Yeah, my run.” Mark chuckled and I turned around, walking back towards the house, “Tell me everything.”

“It’s a one-day job, but it’s very important. The names are Wen Junhui and Xu Minghao. I’ll send you the details in a message on your other number, delete it once you had it memorized.”

“What exactly will I have to look out for?” I wondered as I passed by the police car again, the officers were gone this time.

“Those two are planning a heist, just take pictures of each jewelry place they go inside and send them to me straight when you think it’s clear.” I pursed my lips and thought a little.

“Fine, but don’t say a word to Doyoung. He knows about us and he’s very mad.”

“I know,” Mark cleared his throat, sounding awkward, “He very much wants to fire me right now. Maybe you heard, but Sana is dead, so he’s the big boss now…”

“I know,” I muttered and walked down the street, looking around before crossing onto the other side, “Doyoung told me. Seems like she was nuts or something…”

“She had it coming,” Mark scoffed and it peaked my interest, “Anyone who works against or turns on Kim Mingyu ends up being dead.”

My eyebrows furrowed and I was about to ask who this man was, but Mark gasped, “Shit, your brother is coming—keep your eyes on your phone!”

He hung up and I sighed as I locked my phone, wondering if I would find anything about Kim Mingyu on the internet. Since Wonwoo worked for him, I’ve seen him a few times, his business seemed pretty serious. Lost in thought, I didn’t notice the guy approaching me and gasped when their shoulder collided with mine. I hissed and stopped, turning around to shout at them, but the person didn’t even acknowledge me.

“Asshole!” I shouted after them, noticing their hunched form. The person seemed tall and looked like he was trying to hide his actual height. I turned to walk when the scent hit me. Musk and gunpowder. I quickly turned around, but the man in the black clothes was already gone.

Was that your secret admirer?

I shivered and quickly ran the rest of the way home, only being around the corner. I quickly unlocked the gate and as I walked inside, my eyes fell on the white lilies that I threw in the dumpster this morning. I felt bad for them because they were very beautiful, but I didn’t want them inside the house anymore.

After showering and getting ready, I checked out Mark’s message and memorized the information quickly, deleting the message. I grabbed my laptop and put it inside my bag together with my camera as I pulled on my tennis shoes and left the house, locking everything after me. I had an hour until the targets would show up to the city center to check out all shops, so I decided to take a walk there, try to use up the energy that didn’t go away while I was running due to it being cut short. I let Doyoung know that I was going out and to an agglomerated area, so that he didn’t have to worry, besides he had the tracker on. I snapped a few pictures as I walked and reveled in the silence around me as I took the back streets, where less people walked. I wondered what Wonwoo was doing, and suddenly I felt bad that I didn’t follow him around today. He’d be at his work place right now, having already been to the gym earlier this morning after he dropped Hyemi off at work and bought his coffee. What was interesting about Wonwoo was that each time he ordered coffee, he bought something different. My phone dinged as I turned onto the main street, getting lost in the crowd of people as I opened my phone and almost shrieked when I saw whom the message was from.

From Wonwoo: Hey…I hope I’m not bothering you…I was just wondering when we could meet up? You know…to give me back my t-shirt.

I struggled for a second to hold the phone in both hands and also not walk into others as I typed back.

To Wonwoo: Hi! You’re not bothering me at all! I washed it this morning…so if the weather is nice, it’ll be totally dry by tomorrow! Is tomorrow good for you?

I was about to put my phone away, but Wonwoo started typing back instantly and soon came his answer.

From Wonwoo: I can’t tomorrow, I won’t be in town and will only get back late. The next day…is it good for you?

I looked around me, noticing that I was in the area Mark instructed me to. I noticed the first jewelry shop and found a bench right across from it, so I hurried to take a seat there.

To Wonwoo: Sure, at noon? We can have lunch, since I turned it down last time…

My heart was pounding in my chest as I waited for Wonwoo’s answer, which seemed to take ages, and in fact only took a few seconds.

From Wonwoo: Fine, but let’s go to a restaurant. The food is better than the one at the mall.

He wasn’t wrong, besides this was sounding an awful lot like a date. I giggled and looked around before typing back.

To Wonwoo: Tell me the location and time?

From Wonwoo: 1 o’clock, but I’ll pick you up. Give me your address.

I hesitated for a second, knowing better not to give away my address to a complete stranger. My parents warned me about bad people, and so did Doyoung numerous times…especially since he became a cop and had to work on many cases that ended badly due to naïve girls going on dates with guys from Tinder. But I didn’t meet Wonwoo on Tinder…and I’ve already been watching him for weeks, I know what he’s like.

Honestly, you would pass on an opportunity like this one, Y/N? Isn’t this what we’ve been working for? Getting Wonwoo? Why did you even bother if you’re about to refuse him?!

When I saw Wonwoo typing, I quickly sent him my address, scared that he thought I was about to refuse him after I was the one who proposed getting lunch.

From Wonwoo: Alright, I’ll be there then.

To Wonwoo: Can’t wait to see you!

I instantly regretted sending that, but it was no use deleting it as he had already read the message.

From Wonwoo: Me too.

I giggled again and as I looked up; I saw a black Ferrari pulling up. I quickly scrambled to get out my camera from my bag and turned it on at lightning speed. I snapped pictures as the targets got out of the car. They were the same guys from the pictures Mark sent me, Minghao and Junhui. Both dressed pretty fancy and I knew they were the targets. I remained seated as they walked inside the first jewelry shop and snapped a picture of it. They didn’t spend much time in, quickly headed to the next one. I followed them from the bench as long as I could, but as they started walking towards the end of the street, I had to move too to be able to catch them. My phone and Wonwoo were forgotten, but just as I got up from the bench, throwing my bag over my shoulder and camera in my hand, my phone buzzed. As the targets were still inside the shop, I quickly checked to see that I had another new message from Wonwoo.

From Wonwoo: What are you doing right now?

I paused a little bit, finding his wording a little weird, but shrugged it off. I looked up just as the targets walked out of the shop and placed my phone in my pocket, snapping pictures as they talked and looked around. I wasn’t afraid that they’d see me as there were lots of people around us, but it still felt like I was being watched. They didn’t move from that spot, so I quickly answered Wonwoo.

To Wonwoo: Nothing much, just working. You?

I looked up to see the targets moving across the street, headed to a simple gardening shop. What could they be doing there? I started quickly walking towards it and snapped a picture just as I passed by in front of it, hopeful that no one saw me. Especially the targets. Then they walked out and headed down the street, towards the bench I was sitting at previously. I trailed after them, keeping a good distance as I pretended to look around and snapped a few pictures of the things that were displayed in the windows, trying to act normal and as if I was a tourist. I felt my phone vibrating again, so I checked it with a sigh. This isn’t how I’m supposed to be doing my work.

From Wonwoo: Working too, waiting for my boss.

So Wonwoo was with Mingyu then, probably sitting in his red Mercedes, waiting for Mingyu to show up and order him around. I didn’t react to the text message as the targets started moving again, headed for the Ferrari they have arrived in. Hastily, I snapped a few more pictures of the car, getting the license plate, and once they sped off, I took a deep breath. Well, I wasn’t caught, so that was amazing. Now I just have to send Mark all the photos and then have some lunch, my stomach is screaming for food.

I found a nice restaurant just around the corner and sat at a table at the back, opening my laptop. I copied all pictures on it and then sent Mark everything through an e-mail before deleting everything off my camera and laptop. No traces of what I had done, perfect as always.

To Mark: Everything good?

From Mark: Perfect, thanks again. I’ll pay you later, wait around a little bit.

To Mark: Fine, I have to eat either way!

And then I put my phone away and ordered food, which thankfully came quickly, as I was really hungry. I bobbed my head to the songs played on the radio while I ate, my legs bouncing underneath the table, unable to sit still. Not that it was something unusual. I was slurping up the rest of the soup when Doyoung messaged me and told me he would be home early again and that he could pick me up if I wanted him to. But I couldn’t as Mark had to pay me still, so I told him that I wanted to stay out alone for a little bit longer. And after almost two hours of me sitting at the restaurant, Mark finally called me that he was in front of the gardening shop, waiting for me. Paying for the food and greeting the lady, I left the restaurant in a hurry, glad that Mark finally showed up. In truth, I wanted Doyoung to pick me up, but he was at home by now and I didn’t want to bother him. I would just take a cab as it was getting dark and I didn’t want to walk home anymore. The exchange between Mark and I was brief as usual and I quickly found a cab for myself. I got in and told the driver where to take me and got comfortable against the beige leather seats. I sighed and started tapping my thigh with my fingers, looking out the window at the bright billboards and lights of the city. We went past the first intersection, but traffic was getting bad as everyone was headed home or out to have fun, so we caught the next red light. The cab driver turned the volume of the radio up a bit as he started bobbing his head to the beat and I found myself tapping along it too; the song was catchy. Police car sirens could be heard in the distance, but it wasn’t something unusual. Then suddenly, there was a commotion a few cars behind us and as I twisted my neck to see what was happening, four figures in all black and masks covering their whole faces ran up to the car. The cab driver panicked and before he could lock the doors, his door was ripped open and he was pulled out. I jumped and opened my own door in a hurry, wanting to get out, but I couldn’t as all four doors of the cab were now ripped open and the four men jumped in. I got pushed into the middle by my head by the man on my right and squeezed there as I gripped my bag to my chest. All doors were shut closed and only the driver put on his seatbelt. Suddenly, he started reeving the engine and then crashed into the car in front of us. The car jolted and I gasped as I was sent forward, eyes wide as my heart pumped loudly. God damn it, I should have just accepted Doyoung’s offer and asked Mark to pay me tomorrow. The cab driver was holding onto his head and screaming for help as the sirens got closer and the driver started honking, trying to make space for us to pass. I remained silent and shocked, gripping onto my bag and hopeful that they wouldn’t do anything to me. They seemed too stressed about leaving and getting away from the approaching police.

“For fuck’s sake!” Suddenly the one in the passenger seat shouted, his voice raspy, as he threw his door open and got halfway out. And then a silver thing glinted in his hand and I made myself small as I knew he was about to pull the trigger. The gunshots were loud as people started screaming around, suddenly the cars in front of us started moving aside, the light had turned green too.

“Floor it!” The man to my left shouted and the one in the passenger seat hopped back in as the driver pressed the gas pedal and we were sent flying forward. I yelped and held onto the headrest of the passenger seat tightly, looking ahead. The driver was honking constantly until every car started moving out of the way and we were flying down the road, but the sirens were closer too. So close, that the red and blue lights could be seen from inside the car. My breathing started to pick up as my left leg was bouncing very fast, and I was trying to remain as calm as I could. It seemed like they didn’t want to bother with me, so if I remain silent, maybe nothing will happen to me. I might as well blindfold myself so that I know nothing about where they are taking me and then they can let me free as I haven’t seen their faces.

The light turned red in front of us, but the driver wasn’t paying any attention to the traffic lights as he was speeding and switching lanes frantically, even going into the opposite lanes, making me squeeze my eyes shut. If we were about to run into any car, I didn’t want to see it. My bouncing leg knocked into something and I opened one eyes, becoming aware that these criminals were holding black bags that seemed to be heavy. They must have robbed some place and now were running away, just fucking perfect that they chose this cab! I gasped again as the car was jerked to the right and I was sent into the person on my left, making them hiss. I was expecting a slap or them to scream at me, but they just gently adjusted me back into the middle seat, turning their head towards me as if they realized for the first time that I was in the car too. I could see their brown eyes, and they widened. Mine widened too out of fear and I quickly ducked my head, holding onto my bag tightly. By now, the police was full on chasing these criminals, they were right behind us and the car was jerked to the left this time.

“Fuck this shit car!” A very deep voice suddenly shouted, making me jump, “I can’t outrun the fucking police in this old ass piece of shit—”

“Calm down!” The man on my right snapped, voice tense and raised. My left leg was bouncing so fast that I was getting a cramp in my thigh, but I couldn’t stop, I was on the brink of passing out from how anxious I was feeling. I stopped breathing normally a long time ago and I even started sweating, if only someone would’ve rolled down a window…

“Where the fuck do I go if they are trailing us? I can’t lose them here!” The deep voiced man continued shouting and he honked again as the sirens seemed to become deafening. But the more I concentrated on his deep voice, the more familiar it became. My body felt like it was made out of rock already, but it seemed like I could tense up even more. My breath got cut off for a second as my head snapped up, my whole body sitting up straight. My eyes bore into the back of the driver’s head. I knew that voice, but it can’t be. My brain is just making up things, I’m under so much stress that I started making up things.

“Take the back streets!” The man from the passenger seat answered him, “Boss is waiting at the docks.”

“The docks are fucking half an hour away from here! Start shooting at their cars tires, you idiots!” The driver’s deep voice boomed in the car and I shivered as three windows were rolled down. The three men suddenly all had weapons in their hands and they started shooting at the police car that was speeding beside the cab. I remained staring at the driver as my brain was screaming at me that the voice belonged to Wonwoo. Suddenly, the guy looked in the rearview mirror and our gazes connected. My mouth fell open when I saw foxy eyes staring back at me with the intensity I was used to seeing from Wonwoo, their brown seemed to be even darker as I gaped at Wonwoo. This can’t be happening, no. This must be a joke. But Wonwoo’s eyes narrowed and he quickly looked back at the road, taking another sharp turn as the rest managed to get rid of that one police car, but at least three more were still chasing us. Suddenly, I felt my phone vibrating in my back pocket and I let go of my bag with one hand, only now noticing how badly I was shaking. I knew no one was paying attention to me, so I curled up into a ball and sneakily placed the phone against my ear after hitting the green button.

“Y/N?!” Doyoung’s voice was frantic and the sirens were even louder through the phone, “Why the hell are you in the car we are chasing—”

Suddenly, the phone was ripped from my hands and I shrieked, trying to reach for it, “Doyoung!”

But the guys on each of my side held me down and the man in the passenger’s seat had the phone against his ear.

“Listen here—” But he was cut off by Doyoung, I could hear him screaming through the phone, but I didn’t understand what he was saying as all I could hear were my own loud heart beats as I struggled against the men holding me. Finally, my flight or fight kicked in, and I chose to fight as I didn’t really have the opportunity to run. Only God knows what was about to happen, I wasn’t going to sit around anymore. I elbowed the man on my right in the stomach and he cried out loudly as I finally freed my right arm. The man on my left was very skinny, but despite that he was very strong and my arm was turning numb, that’s how hard he was squeezing me. I started fighting against him too, punched him in the face with my free hand, even though he tried dodging it. My left arm was free too and I lunged for the guy in the passenger seat, knowing that I’d kill all of us if I started choking Wonwoo. So instead, my hands went around the other guy’s neck from behind as I started squeezing, the words he was about to say to my brother dying away in his throat. My phone fell from his hand and he gripped my wrists, trying to claw at me with his nails, but he was wearing glows. I started squeezing even harder as Wonwoo started swerving the car around violently.

“Get a fucking grip on her!” He shouted as with his right hand he gripped my bicep and started yanking on my arm. I cried out in pain, trying to elbow him as suddenly hands around my waist and forearms were pulling me back harshly. The guy I was choking started fighting back too, probably close to passing out as his struggling became less and less. But these guys were very strong, and two were pulling me back while one was squeezing so hard on my bicep that it felt like someone was trying to rip my arm off, I had to let go of the guy in the passenger seat. He started coughing and wheezing loudly as he fell forward. I screamed as I was restrained, this time the guys were almost sitting on me to stop me from fighting back. Wonwoo looked at me through the rearview mirror and I knew that he knew I recognized him, his deadly glare made me still instantly. I was rooted against the leather seat as he reached for my phone and hit a button, no doubt calling my brother.

“You want your sister? You play along with me.” Was all he said before hanging up and throwing the phone back at me, hitting my knees as it fell onto the ground. The guys still held me tightly, even though I stopped struggling. The one in the front stopped coughing, but he was still leaned over, holding onto his head as he was breathing loudly. My lungs were rising and falling at an alarming pace as my legs started bouncing again. But then suddenly Wonwoo took a sharp U turn and the police cars stopped following us. The sirens stopped blaring, all you could see were the lights, lights that were getting farther away from us. Doyoung was getting farther away from me, he was in one of those cars! I bit my lower lip and tried to keep the thoughts about me dying out as for once in my life I focused on the voices.

Look at that, Y/N is having the most fun she’s ever head. Don’t worry, you won’t die. Wonwoo won’t kill you, he’s into you. And he probably knows that you know it’s him. Isn’t he just so hot? The way he screamed, the way he’s driving…and you thought he was boring?! His burning gaze makes you feel all sorts of ways, Y/N, admit it. Now calm down, you are getting out of this alive.

The voices weren’t helpful as they were rambling about Wonwoo, but I did take a deep breath and noticed that until I was zoned out, he stopped driving at a crazy speed. We were downtown, but nowhere close to the docks. Wonwoo pulled up into the parking lot of a poorly lit convenience store, where a police car was already there. But all lights were off and only one man was there, walking around the car anxiously. It was Doyoung and my heart almost jumped out of my chest when Wonwoo stopped the car just next to Doyoung’s police car. The doors were kicked open again and I jumped when the guy on my left held onto my bicep, Wonwoo squeezed me so hard that my whole arm was on fire, it would bruise so ugly. I was pulled out of the car, but not manhandled, as Doyoung came to a stop at the back of the car. The guy let go of me and I took two hurried steps, but someone blocked my path, and I ran into their hard chest. Musk and gunpowder. I didn’t look up at Wonwoo, only stared at his chest as I held my bag against my stomach, my whole-body trembling.

“Say a word to anyone about this, I know where you live and I won’t hesitate to find you.” His deep voice was low as he whispered to me, radiating anger. I bit my lower lip and said nothing as I knocked into him hard and walked past to get to Doyoung. He was quick to pull me into his arms and I clung onto him, telling myself that I was finally safe. It was silent as no one dared to say anything; Doyoung was so tense, he felt like I was hugging a rock.

“If you ever again put my sister into danger, I won’t hesitate to continue what Sana started. You’re lucky I’ve known Mingyu since we were kids, otherwise you’d be laying in jail for life right now.” Doyoung was so angry, his voice trembled and it even raised a few octaves as he spoke to the criminals. I couldn’t believe what he was saying. He was just letting them off like that? They were criminals!

“Your generosity will be always returned, you know that, Doyoung.” The guy I choked could barely speak, his voice was a low rasp and then I heard something colliding against the concrete. Doyoung moved us a little as car doors were closed and the engine of the cab started again as Wonwoo pulled out of the parking lot with the tires screeching. I let go of Doyoung and looked at him disappointed, lips trembling.

“You’re a corrupt cop?” I managed to say as a few tears fell from my eyes. He looked down at the bag and picked it up, remorse showing on his face.

“You weren’t supposed to find out, but it’s a complicated story—”

“Nothing about this is complicated!” I shouted, angrily wiping the tears off my cheeks, “You just let four criminals run off like nothing happened! Like I couldn’t have been killed in that chase or afterwards by them! If people like you are the ones protecting this city everyone should be afraid for their own lives!”

Doyoung’s face got red and he pointed a finger at me, “You don’t get to tell me what’s wrong and what’s right! I’m not perfect; you think you’re the only one with flaws, Y/N?! Wake up! I’m not the perfect brother you always make me out to be! Once you start working for the mafia there’s no way out—”

“You work for the mafia?!” I screamed, seeing Doyoung in a different light for the first time. He really wasn’t the person I thought he was. The innocent Doyoung never existed, at least not since he’s been working for the mafia apparently.

“No, but I help them out sometimes. Mingyu and I made a pact a long time ago—”

“Kim Mingyu is the mafia leader?”

“Yes—”

“Who is Jeon Wonwoo?” Doyoung paused for a second, eyebrows furrowing. I raised my eyebrows at him as I waited for an answer. Oh, and he was going to give me all the answers I wanted.

“A very skilled getaway driver, Mingyu’s closest and most trusted friend, and his chauffeur.” Doyoung answered me after he took a deep breath, searching my face for a reaction. But it never came, I surpassed it. I felt tired and I was aching all over, I need a warm bath and sleep. I didn’t even want to know anything anymore, that was enough.

“Let’s go home.” I said with a sigh and walked up to the police car, “I’m very tired.”

“Y/N—”

“Now, Doyoung.” I snapped and opened the door, sitting inside angrily. Doyoung shook his head before following suit, remaining silent for the rest of the night.

Isn’t Wonwoo just the most amazing person you’ve ever—Shut up, I shouted in my head, closing my eyes tightly. I was done listening to the voices. I wanted nothing to do with them anymore. No, Wonwoo was a criminal and he made it very clear what he’d do if I said anything about what happened. I was going to ask Mark to return that damned t-shirt to him and I never wanted to see Wonwoo again or talk to him again. I blocked his number and deleted all pictures I had of him in my phone. In the morning, when I was home alone, I was going to burn every single thing I had collected about him, every single picture I snapped. He was a criminal and I wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

           Ever since last night Doyoung was acting like I was an alien. He didn’t speak to me; he didn’t even look at me! He quietly greeted me when I walked to the kitchen to have breakfast, but before I could thank him for making breakfast or ask him how he slept, he was out of the front door. He barely checked up on me all day, and when I gave him a call to ask him if he’d come home for lunch as I cooked food, he didn’t answer but sent a text saying that he couldn’t speak to me at the moment. It was pissing me off. I didn’t want him to make this harder for us. What I found out was a lot to take in and I wasn’t proud of him, but he was my brother and he was the only person who stood by my side since day one without judging me. I loved him very much and I needed him next to me. I needed him to understand that nothing changed between us, besides the fact that currently I was very pissed off and scared. The police were still patrolling around the neighborhood as no DNA was found inside the house that didn’t belong to us, and honestly, I was on the verge of inviting the officers inside the house as I jumped at every sound. Sleep came easily as I was very stressed, but my eyes opened at five in morning and I haven’t been able to go back to sleep, so I got to work. I gathered everything I had on Wonwoo and threw it in the fireplace in the back garden and watched it as it burned away in the morning light. It eased my nerves a little bit as I clutched the blanket tighter around me, knowing that Wonwoo was out of town today. But tomorrow he wouldn’t be, and I had a feeling that he was still going to want to meet up with me. But I didn’t want to, not anymore. Knowing that Mark wasn’t sleeping at that hour, I called him, and told him everything that happened. He was very sorry and felt really guilty and promised to never send me off to watch mafia members, I was content with that. Watching shady business men was alright, but following mafia members wasn’t fun anymore. I stayed inside the whole day after I went on my run and just cleaned and cooked even more. I updated my blog and accepted a request of someone to put up my photos in their gallery next month. Since Mark wasn’t going to contact me for a while now, I started looking for vacation destinations. I really needed it, I had to get away from the city for a while. The voices went quiet and even when I listened closely, I only heard intangible whispers. It was good, it meant I was over Wonwoo. Even if I wasn’t really. The fairytale I was living in was shattered and as I glanced at his folded t-shirt, I sighed. I was hoping that for once I finally found someone who would be good for me, but it turned out I was very wrong. Usually my hunches were good, but this time I was totally blinded by his attractiveness and the voices that never knew better. Shaking my head, I remembered the old lady from the woods and wondered if she was still alive…or if she’d recognize me if I showed up. She told me she’d welcome me anytime again, but I didn’t visit her very frequently as my family was keeping a close eye on me after I ran away, and it was fine. But now, I craved to be engulfed in total silence and the green nature around me.

Nightfall came and I was eating on the couch as I watched a reality show, laughing loudly when something was amusing. It wasn’t very late, but the sun still set early as we haven’t passed the spring solstice yet. I just bit into the meatball I made for lunch when the front door was unlocked and I heard Doyoung’s keys.

“Hi!” I called out with my mouth full, raising the hand with which I was holding the fork to wave at him. Doyoung hummed and went to the fridge directly and opened it.

“Oh, I made a lot of food today,” I said as I turned around, resting both legs on the couch, “Meatballs, found some spaghetti too so I made some sauce for it. I made a salad with the veggies we had and lentil cream soup, your favorite!”

But Doyoung didn’t react and my eyebrows furrowed as I chewed the food I had in my mouth. This had do end right now, I wasn’t going to let my brother treat me like I was invisible just because I found out that he’s a corrupt cop.

“Hey!” I snapped, placing the plate on the coffee table forcefully, “Stop being a pussy and face me!”

Doyoung sighed and threw a glance at me as he took out the soup and I spoke again, “Aren’t I the one supposed to be giving you the silent treatment?!”

Doyoung just shrugged as he took a bowl and poured soup into it, “I don’t know…”

“Nice to hear you are still able to speak—���

“Are you not mad?” Doyoung cut me off before I could finish my sarcastic remark and I glared at him.

“I’m very mad, but it doesn’t mean that I’ll stop acknowledging you, yeah? What kind of shit person does that?” I rolled my eyes and Doyoung chuckled, throwing a glance at me as he sat at the table to eat.

“The me kind of shit person apparently.” I chuckled and resumed eating as Doyoung did too. I lowered the volume of the TV a little bit and turned back towards him again, taking in his attire. His uniform changed; I didn’t notice it this morning.

“You have a new uniform?” I asked with a grin and Doyoung nodded, looking down at himself.

“Yeah, I got it today.” I nodded and bit into the meatball.

“Well, congratulations—next time lock the mafia guys up, yeah?” Doyoung paused and I knew it was too soon to joke about this, but I wasn’t exactly joking. My tone wasn’t playful at all and Doyoung sighed, wordlessly nodding as he started slurping his soup.

“Were you that hungry? You didn’t even change…” I wondered as Doyoung finished eating and stood up.

“No, but I have to go to the funeral house. It’s Sana’s watcher…” My lips formed a thin line as I nodded, finishing my dinner wordlessly as Doyoung moved around the kitchen. He squeezed some lemon in his water and drank it, closing his eyes for a second. His body seemed tense and he was hunched a little forward as he washed away the dishes he used.

“Don’t come too late, you should rest more.” I said as Doyoung nodded and put on his shoes, taking his keys.

“You too, don’t wait for me.” He said and I nodded, watching him leave the house. The locked the door and I sighed, getting up from the couch. I walked to the sink and washed the plate and fork I used, putting them away. I left the TV on as I just wanted to change into my pajamas and go back to watch something before bed. But as I reached my door, I heard footsteps outside the front door and knocking. Rolling my eyes, I walked to the front door and unlocked it, ready to tease Doyoung for forgetting something at home again. But it wasn’t Doyoung. I froze as I stared at Wonwoo’s face, goosebumps suddenly covering my body. Then I realized it was Wonwoo and quickly tried to slam the door closed, but Wonwoo was quick to react and he started pushing it back. I hissed and put all of my weight against it, struggling to close it as Wonwoo was pushing just as hard to open it up. I was wearing socks and my right leg slipped on the tiles and Wonwoo gained advantage as my weight shifted. He was able to push it wide enough to slip inside and I quickly abandoned the thought of trying to keep him out of the house and ran to the cupboard full of knives. I quickly opened it and took out the sharpest knife we had and turned around, just in time as Wonwoo almost reached me.

“Stay away!” I pointed the knife at him and he stayed rooted, his sharp eyes gazing into mine, “What do you want? I didn’t say anything to anyone—Doyoung already knew about you! You want your bloody t-shirt?! It’s in my room!”

Wonwoo remained silent and I jerked my hand slightly, showing him that I wasn’t afraid to stab him. I wouldn’t go down without a good fight, in case he thought I was scared of him. Which I was, but I was angrier right now and it ruled over my fear.

“I just came to talk.” Wonwoo said calmly and I chuckled dryly, rolling my eyes.

“Oh, nice talking. This is how you usually do it? You break into someone’s house and get threatened by a knife and then just…talk?”

“I usually don’t get threatened.” Wonwoo answered with a shrug and I huffed, eyes darting towards my phone that was on the coffee table. If I outsmart Wonwoo, I can get to my phone and run inside my room and jump out the window. Then he can try and talk to me, but I won’t be here anymore.

“Well…less stressful for you, I guess.” I tried stalling, gripping the knife tighter, “But I’m not in the mood to talk.”

“Just listen to me, I’m not here to hurt you.” Wonwoo’s voice softened and his eyes did too as he tried pleading me with his gaze. I rolled my eyes and then lunged towards him, without the intention of stabbing him. I just wanted to take him off guard, to distract him. And it worked as he jumped back with a gasp, his sharp eyes widening. I dropped the knife and pushed him hard, making him fall onto his butt. I quickly ran around him and got to the fridge when I was grabbed. Well, obviously my plan wasn’t a smart one and this is why Doyoung checked on me regularly. I really needed someone to look after me. I yelped as Wonwoo’s arms went around my waist and roughly yanked me back, pinning me against the table with his body. He didn’t look very pleased and my heart started beating quickly, thinking of a way to free myself from his grip. I could either kneel him or just try and headbutt him, but it seemed like Wonwoo guessed what I was thinking as his lean and muscular body molded into mine. My wrists were pinned to the table and I shivered, his cologne hitting my nose hard. He smelled like musk and gunpowder again and he was so close I could count his lashes if I wanted to. I craned my head back and tried to move around, but it only made me feel more parts of body and that was too much just yet.

Look at this compromising position, Y/N. All you have to do is lean in and open your knees, isn’t that what you’ve wanted all along? We are guessing Wonwoo wants the same thing…not that we are complaining.

I tried to remain unexpressive as the voices suddenly returned and were very loud, of course they’d come back in a situation like this one.

“Well, this is very uncomfortable.” I said quietly, maintaining the eye contact with Wonwoo. My heart was beating fast and I could feel the heat in my cheeks. This wasn’t the reaction I was expecting. Why do I still like him? After yesterday…how can I still like him?

“Well, you didn’t give me a choice.” Wonwoo muttered, his low voice vibrating against his chest and I rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, sure,” I scoffed and then glared at him, “why would I want to talk to a criminal? Let alone give him a chance to explain himself?”

“Did you let your brother explain himself?” Wonwoo’s eyebrows rose and I glanced away, trying to free my wrists again.

“Kind of…” Wonwoo just hummed and lessened his hold on my wrist so that it didn’t hurt anymore. The bicep he squeezed so hard was now a beautiful shade of green and purple.

“Then it’s my turn—”

“Whatever Wonwoo, I really don’t care. You’re part of the mafia and you robbed the jewelry shops Mark asked me to watch yesterday. And then you had to run away because Mark alerted the police thanks to me and then very sadly you got in the same cab with me. And look at my bicep, you did that.” I snapped, looking down at the bruise as Wonwoo’s gaze followed. His eyebrows furrowed and he sighed, looking back up at me.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.” He muttered with remorse as he looked at it again. His words and reaction were genuine but I just rolled my eyes.

“A little late for that, now—” I shoved myself into him, but it did nothing, “Let go of me.”

Wonwoo’s lips pulled in a straight line and he shook his head, seemingly thinking about what to do next. But I started struggling and trying to move him back so that I would be able to knee him. But he probably knew that was what I was trying to do and squeezed my legs together between his.

“God, the second I get out of your hold I will beat you up so badly, Wonwoo, no one will be able to recognize you—” Wonwoo’s deep laughter echoed in the house as I looked at him menacingly. I wasn’t joking, I really wanted to beat him up and I would, but I needed to free myself first.

“I love how you underestimate me; the shock will be bigger once I’m done—” But Wonwoo’s laughter was so contagious that I had to fight back my own. His nose was scrunched up and I just noticed how he wasn’t wearing glasses. His hair was styled back and he seemed to be wearing some fancy clothes, his pants were silky. He was very attractive, but I tried to ignore my sudden thirst for him. So, I looked away and he slowly stopped laughing, my eyes fell on the front door as I tried coming up with another escape route. But on the ground were five white lilies and I felt my mind go blank as I stared at them. There’s no possible way anyone brought those in, Doyoung and I never buy white lilies, and Wonwoo is the only one that just barged in. Wonwoo.

“Oh my God,” I muttered in despair, looking at Wonwoo all frantic, “Did you—bring those flowers? Wonwoo?!”

Wonwoo looked at the flowers and cleared his throat, looking back at me, “Yeah.”

“Oh my God.” I muttered again and felt like a deer caught in headlights. It was Wonwoo all along? What is happening? I don’t understand anything anymore!

Well…at least you found out who your secret admirer is. And it’s Wonwoo, you should be happy it’s him and not some old creep—

“Shut up!” I exclaimed, squeezing my eyes shut, “This can’t be happening. No fucking way.”

Wonwoo looked confused when I opened my eyes and looked at him, “You were breaking in our house for two weeks?!”

“You’re the one to make a scene, huh?” Wonwoo suddenly raised his voice and his eyes narrowed as he started glaring at me, “You’ve been stalking me for two weeks.”

I gaped at him and blinked, taken off guard, “I—I wasn’t—what?”

“Yeah, you really thought I wouldn’t know?” He chuckled unamused, “I’m surprised it took you this long to realize it was me bringing the flowers.”

My eyebrows furrowed and I looked at him confused, “How was I supposed to know?! I thought you had no idea I was watching you—”

“Stalking me.”

“Stalking you, whatever,” I rolled my eyes, trying to make sense of the situation, “It doesn’t give you the right to break in my room and—were you marking your territory or some shit mafias do? Were you showing other mafias that you were to be the one to kill me—”

“What nonsense are you talking about?” Wonwoo’s eyebrows furrowed and I tried to push him away again, my back was becoming numb, “You fantasize too much. Mafias don’t do that, but—”

“But what?!” I snapped, eyes widening.

“I did think of killing you in the first three days of you stalking me.” Wonwoo finished with a smirk. My heart skipped another beat as I started breathing faster, his musky scent made me feel dizzy.

“What?!” I exclaimed and started struggling against Wonwoo again, trying to free myself, “For God’s sake, I can’t feel my back anymore, Wonwoo!”

He gave me a look that said if I tried running away again he’d tie me to a chair and leave me there until Doyoung returned, he probably would’ve gagged me too, so I just sighed and let go of all muscles, softening my body. Wonwoo’s eyes gazed into mine intently and his hold slowly loosened as he seemed to lean in subconsciously. My eyes fell onto his lips and realized how plump his upper lip was, but we both snapped out if at the same time as he stepped back and I jumped away from the table, breathing hard. I massaged my lower back as best as I could as I licked my lips and looked at Wonwoo with a glare.

“I don’t like what I’m about to say—” And I took a deep breath and watched as Wonwoo started smirking again, “But what if…we both just forget about all the shit we did and…go on and live our lives like we never met. And, I don’t know, get some therapy as we both apparently need it badly.”

My words made Wonwoo laugh again and I actually smiled this time too, feeling tired after all the new information dumped on me.

“I can’t do that,” Wonwoo said once his laughter died down, “I can’t continue living like I never met you.”

I shrugged and ran my hands through my hair, looking away from him, “Well, I can and I will. So, you better do the same or else I’ll tell Doyoung about everything and he’ll be really pissed and won’t care about Mingyu or whoever, yeah?”

Look at our Y/N lying like that, as if all of this didn’t happen because of her.

I felt Wonwoo move closer to me and his fingers ghosted over the bruise on my left bicep, “Can you really pretend I don’t exist? When you started this?”

“I didn’t start shit!” I snapped and turned my body away from his, “I stalked you for two weeks and I won’t do it anymore because I got over you. I always do. It never lasts for long, you’re not special.”

But he is Y/N, you know it. He knows it.

“Really?” Wonwoo muttered with a small smile and I just shrugged, avoiding his gaze, “Because I watched you the whole time we were in the same Coffee Shop. You were following that businessman, working for Mark, I assume. I noticed how you couldn’t stay still and how you whispered things to yourself. How the barista lit up when she saw you and talked to you. If you wouldn’t have stalked me after that day, I would’ve still found you.”

I just gulped and felt all the anger, frustration, fear melt away as I slowly looked at Wonwoo, “But you broke inside my bedroom…to give me flowers…”

My voice was small and he nodded as he stepped closer, placing his palm on my cheek. I almost jumped at how warm his palm was again and tried to ignore the rapid beat of my heart, “And I was wrong to do that…sorry.”

“Sorry for stalking you.” I muttered and a small grin appeared on Wonwoo’s lips as he closed the distance between our bodies again.

“I’m also sorry for the other bad things I did.” Wonwoo added.

“Yeah, fuck you.” I said with a chuckle and his grin widened into a smile.

You’d love that, wouldn’t you, Y/N?

I rolled my eyes at the voices but Wonwoo didn’t react as he leaned down and his red lips pressed against my cheek, making me blush instantly. Why did I forgive him so easily? Maybe because both of us fucked up big time this time.

“I still expect to see you tomorrow at lunch for our date, so tell Mark to stay at home.” My eyes widened as Wonwoo stepped back, letting go of my cheek.

“How do you know—”

“I’m in the mafia, remember? I know everything.” He winked and walked towards the front door.

“And you called me the stalker.” He chuckled as he opened the door and stepped outside.

“Don’t tell Doyoung just yet, he’s very mad for what I did yesterday—”

“Yeah, me too.” I cut him off and Wonwoo gave me an apologetic smile.

“Sleep well.”

“Don’t break in my room anymore!” I called out as he walked down towards the gate, turning around to wave at me. I rolled my eyes and closed the front door, locking it. Jesus, this really is not how I expected things to turn out. I don’t think I need to watch any TV to feel sleepy. This is my cue to rest and worry about what to wear tomorrow for lunch.

You can wear whatever, Wonwoo is head over heels for you, Y/N. And as we’re seeing, you’re too for him.

#bvidzsoo #seventeen scenarios #seventeen oneshot #seventeen smut #seventeen fluff #seventeen angst #seventeen mini series #choi seungcheol #yoon jeonghan #joshua hong #wen junhui #kwon soonyoung #jeon wonwoo #lee jihoon #lee seokmin #kim mingyu #xu minghao #boo seungkwan #hansol vernon chwe #lee chan #seventeen ot13 #seventeen wonwoo #wonwoo pairing #wonwoo angst #wonwoo fluff #wonwoo smut #seventeen gang au #seventeen mafia au #wonwoo oneshot #seventeen university au

[purecantarella]

My Ball of Sunshine

my tags and posts are still blocked, but i hope that the people who see this still enjoy❣️also, BELATED TZUYU DAY! also, i live for clichés so leave me be HAHAHAHA highschool AU : nerdy!chou tzuyu x athletic!reader disclaimer : some hate speech and curses, just be wary and don't do this to other people.

Since you were a freshman, you were the school's golden student. Perfect grades, linebacker for the school team even a candidate for captain, running for team captain, healthy social life, and it helped that you were easy on the eyes for both men and women. Everyone wanted to either be you or be with you. There was no in between.

You were the sunshine of the entire school.

So it came to the surprise Chou Tzuyu, the resident quiet average student, when she caught your eye.

The both of you had gone to the same school since you were in elementary school. You'd always briefly passed one another while never actually acknowledging each other's existence. But even so, both your eyes were on each other when neither of your attention was on the other.

It had been one of those serendipitous moments. The rain had started coming down hard, cancelling your team's practice, when you'd formally met Tzuyu for the first time. You were driving home when you saw her fallen over, picking up her soaked textbooks, scratched up knee, dirtied uniform, and wiped away the tears that had had melded in with the rain the chilled her to the bone.

You pulled over hastily and got out the car to help your peer. You covered your head with your hand, squatting down to help her collect herself. Her eyes went wide seeing you of all people. You looked up at her surprised face, a laugh bubbling up through your chest as you picked up her books.

"Come on, let's get you out of the rain, yeah?" You offered, beckoning her to the car.

Once inside, safe from the rain. You reached into the back to grab one of the many hoodies that you had stashed there in case of emergencies. Carefully, you placed the jacked around her, brushing the wet hair from her face. A blush coated her usually pale features as you fussed over her.

When you were sure that she was at least relatively dry, you offered her your usual bright grin. Tzuyu's heart jumping at the sight of your warm smile. As for you, upon seeing her curious brown eyes, pink lips, and her soft and adorable aura, butterflies erupted in your stomach. You bit the inner layer of your cheek gently before saying, "Uh, hey, I'm Y/F/N."

A her lips quirked up into a fleeting but blush-educing smile. She shook her head. "Yeah, I know who you are." Tzuyu leaned back shyly, in attempts to hide the blossoming color that had begun to stain her cheeks. "I'm Chou Tzuyu."

From then on, it wasn't like you could ignore her any longer. The Taiwanese girl was in every one of your classes and even on some occasions you caught her eyeing you during lunch when before her friends giggled at her broken demeanour.

Not long after that, you gave into your desire and began courting her in secret. It was often that Tzuyu would find notes in her locker talking about how amazing she was or how you were happy to be there for her if ever you were needed. Of course the apex came when you were both partnered together for a project.

Like what was previously mentioned, it'd felt like serendipity.

"Chou!" You called, running down the busy school hall. The tall girl had looked back to you, the flutters in her stomach appearing at the sight of your familiar smile. "How about I drive you home again today? So we can work on the project today." You offered, the sparkle in your eye mirroring that of a pup seeing their favorite chew toy.

She tilted her head to the side curiously. "Don't you have practice today?" Tzuyu asked softly

Again, you chuckled softly. The aura around you remaining the warm and welcoming one that brought the other girl so much comfort. "As important as football is to me, I want to give time to other things that are valuable to me." Your teeth snagged your lower lip softly. Thinking for a moment. "That is, of course, if you'd want me to."

Tzuyu controlled the urge to coo at your adorable blushing face, the way your head tilted down in a way it never did usually. You were confident and it took a lot to faze you. So seeing the way you played with your fingers, shifted from side to side, the warmth from your aura had seeped so far into her chest. She could only nod, making your eyes light up like stars.

"Great! Here let me..." You trailed off, taking her books in your hand before leading her to your car in the lot. Catching the eye of almost all the by standing students. You walking some random girl out, holding her books, and most especially, driving away with her was a huge deal.

In a matter of hours, people were texting both of you non-stop, which did trouble Tzuyu a little but she couldn't dwell too much on that with you being a mere table away. Your eyes were dedicatedly trained on the laptop in front of you. Typing away, researching everything you needed for the project. A smile graced her lips, you really were the golden student everyone praised. As you craned your neck, seeking some relief from the tension, your eyes landed on the tall girl startled and her gaze shooting back down to the references before her.

You made an attempt to conceal your smile as you stood up to sit beside her. Wordlessly continuing your work. After a while, both of you gradually scooted each of your seats closer to the other until both your hands were flushed against one another. Tentatively, you moved your hand slowly to intertwine your fingers with hers.

Tzuyu honestly had no complaints, she sat there, reading the same page over and over again. Her focus long gone from the books in front of her. Then again, the soft tapping from your side had ceased a little bit ago as well.

The two of you just sat there, feeling the warmth of each other's hands. Letting the memory mark in your minds. Not long after that your mom had called, prompting you to come home. Tzuyu didn't hesitate to walk you to your car.

"I'll see you tomorrow then?" You asked, opening the car door slightly, your bag lazily slung over your shoulder. She nodded, a wide smile gracing her lips. You mirrored the smile and fully swung the door open. She stood there, silently waiting for you to say something more while you hesitantly entered the vehicle. The tall girl disappointedly and slowly made her way to their house door.

Your vision lingered on your classmate before you thought, 'fuck it.' Your fingers thumped the wheel briefly before you rolled down your window. "Hey Tzuyu?" You called as she whipped back to face you hastily. You bit back the smile that had wanted to erupt onto your lips. "Would you, uh, maybe be okay for me to pick you up before school tomorrow? We get some coffee and get to know each other?" You asked, your head sticking out the window.

The smile on her face returned, eyes turning to crescents before she nodded enthusiastically. "I would love to, Y/n." Your blood rushed at the sound of her voice saying your name. You bit your lower lip before nodding and driving away, leaving the tall girl to place a hand on her forehead. Her cheeks hurting from the growing smile on her face. Meanwhile you your gaze flicked from her form in the rear view to the street, your lip caught under your teeth.

"Oh sweet Lord." You whispered to yourself, running a hand through your hair.

The next morning you stood there nervously tapping at your bag quietly. The cold morning air blew against you and made you shudder despite the thick varsity jacket that you had draped over your shoulders. You were spacing out, listing out the potential things that could go wrong.

A door quickly opening and closing snapped you out of your daze. You looked up and saw the Taiwanese beauty in all her glory. You could tell that there was a little more effort in the light make-up she usually had on but you didn't mind. You pushed yourself off of your car to help her once again with her books.

"Good morning, miss Chou!" You greeted her with a small yet still gleaming smile. She responded with a soft, "Hello." To which the grin on your face grew into a toothy one. You moved to open the car door for her before placing her belongings carefully in the back.

She quirked a curious brow upon seeing your clean backseat. "No piles of hoodies this time?" You laughed softly eyeing the now free space. "That day was an exception. Had I known I would pick you up that day, it would have been clean." You said making her giggle softly.

"Sure," She said rolling her eyes and leaning into the seat.

You looked at her ensemble. It was the school's standard uniform but you noted that she had no way to cover herself from the draft that circled the South Korean air. You slipped off the jacket that you wore and offered it to her. Her brown eyes went wide as she stared at it.

"It's not a big deal, I promise. It's just that it's extra chilly today and I don't want you to get cold." You explained quickly, hand still out waiting for her to take the school jacket. Tzuyu took it quietly before pulling it around herself, savouring your earthy scent that lingered on the fabric.

"Let's go?" You asked before starting the car and pulling out of the driveway.

After you'd gotten some coffee, you'd realized there was little to no time for you two to sit and chat. So you decided to get to school and hang out during lunch. You pulled up and helped her out of the car. Both of you could feel eyes on you both the moment you walked out. Not only did you both exit the same car together, but she was clad in the jacket with your last name embroidered on the back.

She shied away from the glances of the other students. Seeing her unease, you took her free hand in yours. "You're fine...Okay? I've got you." You assured her quietly before she offered you a shy smile.

Once her books were in hand you both made your way into the school, hands still tightly intertwined together. Her locker was already swarmed with jealous girls and cocky looking jocks that you didn't particularly like too much off of the field.

"Y/n!" One of the jocks called, a dumb smile on his face as he eyed Tzuyu. You maintained your composure and gave him a warm smile. "Hey, what's up?" You greeted meekly in attempts to keep the interaction short.

"Just didn't know you were with Chou Tzuyu." He paused to whisper in your ear. "Fine piece of ass don't you think." Your jaw immediately clenched at his crude words. You felt the shorter girl beside you flinch only doubling your anger yet your expression still stayed the bright and cheery one.

There was no need to get involved with any drama.

"We aren't together, man. I invited her to coffee 'cause I wanted to get to know her better." You tightened your smile. "No fuss in that right?" Tzuyu looked up at you, seeking some form of safety from the jocks and mean girls who surrounded her locker. You glanced down at her, trying to bring her some comfort.

"You could do better if you'd ask me, Y/n..." A snarky girl said, checking her nails. With her words, Tzuyu shrunk under everyone's gaze. Even yours. That's when your gaze shot to the girl who'd spoken. The aura around you immediately changed. The hallway went quiet as they saw your expression darken. Once warm and welcoming eyes turned hard and bore holes into the shocked girl's.

You pondered for a moment, releasing Tzuyu's hand briefly to shove your hand in your pocket. Your stance adjusting so you towered over all of the student's. "But I didn't ask you did I?" You sneered at her.

"What I do or who I hang out with is none of your business. In all honesty, I don't even know any of you all that well." You looked around. "But you have no right to speak to anyone, much more her, that way and if you think that I'll take all of this lying down, you've got another thing coming. You've got me coming for you." You said lowly but it resonated in their ears.

"Do I make myself clear?" You asked, your expression cold and unnerving.

Everyone nodded and dispersed at the loud ring of the bell. Once everyone had left, your shoulders fell as well as a held breath released. You turned back to a stunned Tzuyu. Your expression softened as you saw her still petrified.

"I'm sorry about them...and about that whole scene." You said softly, almost remorsefully. The silence hung over you both. While she was surprised you had that side to you, she couldn't help but feel giddy that it was because of her that that side came out at all.

Tzuyu offered you a small smile before leaning up to peck your cheek quickly. "Thank you for trying to defend me." A heat rushed up to your cheeks before you cleared your throat awkwardly. "Uh, can I walk you to class?"

She wordlessly took your hand and leaned into your touch. Your ears pricked up at the action and you both made your way to her first class.

'This is going to be different than I thought...' She thought to herself as she looked up at the little ball of sunshine that was you.

okay this was kinda messy but bare with me HAHAHAHAHA in any case though, i hope you all enjoyed this! again, this wasn't my best but after every revision this went though this was one of the best. i'm working through some stuff HAHAAHH anyway, requests are open and criticism and opinions on my work are completely accepted. i think some of my functions are working as early as when i post this but my tags i believe are still broken. uh anyway, keep safe everyone and i will see all of you very soon 💖 taglist: @labrachrosite

#twice #twice imagines #twice fluff #twice tzuyu #twice x reader #tzuyu imagines #tzuyu x reader #kpop girl group #kpop x reader #gxg #girl group imagines #highschool au

[vashstash]

I saw your post about rvb headcanons. Got anymore you’d care to share?

By all means, never doubt the amount of shitpost in my brain 1. Now that RnBs retired, Wash gets/is gifted a kitten. It's all good and dandy, but there's one thing... Sarge realizes that it gives the Blues one more member and they have the tactical advantage. He makes sure to purchase a battle beast for himself and gets into the mindset of „My cat is better than yours”. Whenever he sees Wash he makes this kind of passive-aggressive conversation like a dad of an overachieving kid: "So. My little battle cat brought me a fine hunt of five fat mice this afternoon. Heghegh. Well...How's your furry beast, Washington?" "Oh, she's adorable! Tucker showed me funny oohh... tictacs? Toks. Tiktoks. And we're thinking of getting her a tiny costume for the Halloween!" "AN ARMOR FOR THE CAT? WHAT GRADE? WHICH MARK IS IT? WHO'S YOUR SUPPLIER?" "Oom...Etsy user kittypaws125?"

As you can see I'm a fan of Sarge one-upping the Blues in the dumbest possible ways (even though he's kinda purple at this point) Cats become friends. He hates it. He brings shotgun to the playdates. Just in case. It's a very tiny shotgun. Shooting cat treats.

2. As a cultured "Donut and Church being besties" enjoyer I do like some whack comedy plots going on. I imagine that Donut and Church sometimes meet in awkward places outside the canyon, like a space Home Depot or IKEA riding the absolute "OH, HI NEIGHBOUR :)" energy wave. As soon as they're back to the canyon, (in this scenario still on fighting terms for comedy reasons) they yell the most stupid insults at each other, mocking the latest purchases like „You dull cookie cutter” or „Unfrothed soy latte asshole”. To the Reds it makes no fucking sense, but also it's Donut so it's basically a Monday for them. Tex thinks Church has the early stages of AI rampancy and Tucker feels like there's a bow-chicka to be made here but he can't grasp exactly why it's bow-wow. Caboose wants both a cookie and a soy latrine. And Doc? Doc thinks Caboose just came up with the biggest brain eco-friendly bathroom banger in history of the mankind.

3. Junior was in the Space Jam. I don't make the rules.

#vashplies #vashcanons #my brain is filled with nothing but 100000 IQ but also 1 braincell ideas #could a dead person make this?? yeah didn't think so #dead person probably died with sheds of honor there's no honor in this zuko #I want the blargh honk version of Fly Like An Eagle and I want it know #No but really think about it it's called SPACE Jam #If Junior doesn't Slam Dunk the fate of the universe teaming up with his dad in s19 I'll be very upset #They foreshadowed it with the photo in Tucker's wallet and people are too blind to see it #[snorts] i'm so sorry please enjoy thank you for asking

[adezahnae]

Is That a Game You Wanna Play, Princess?

A/N: Here is my SECOND Oneshot of my Dilf!MathTeacher!Stepdad!Jaehyun AU. I know I said that would post two Oneshots yesterday but I got caught up with Easter and meeting new family. Besides these were pretty long and I’m still writing the second Oneshot. SORRY THIS TOOK TOO LONG😭

Warnings: Smut, teasing, public teasing, slight public masturbation, rough sex, slight choking, hair pulling, ripped clothing, Daddy kink, fluff, sweet talk

Your POV

I simply just say, I woke up and I chose to be bratty. I wake myself out of the bed and I didn’t see Jaehyun around anywhere. I got up and went to the closet and wore one of my outfits that he most likely enjoyed me wearing the most. I put it on and continued my daily routine. We were pretty late so I had to hurry. He was already downstairs, gathering up things and I came up behind him and gave him a hug.

“Good Morning Princess-“ He was cut off at the sight of my short tight dress that was hugging my curves and some boots to match it. He breathed out and grabbed his keys. “You better be on your best behavior, that’s all I know.” He warned. “Of course!” I smiled. We made our way out of the door and to the car. I put my seatbelt on and leaned over to give him a kiss on his cheek while my hand traveled to his pants.

He quickly grabbed my hand and looked me dead in my eye. “You will and I mean will not do this to me today.” He said. I nod and he pulls away and pulling off and out of our driveway.

We made it to school and the day is going good as it should go. Except for one thing, my bratty behavior. I would tease him by licking my lips, biting on them, flicking my tongue at him and mouthing ‘Daddy’ at him. He narrowed his eyes me. “Behave.” He mouthed. I watched him teach all of us and I spread my legs, making sure no one saw me. No one ever pays attention to me, since no one dared to mess me with me knowing how my dad gets.

I slipped my hand past my underwear feeling over my wet folds. I bit my lip and continued to watch him. When he was looking my way, I bit down on my lip, throwing my head back. I looked back up at him and I was suddenly strike with fear. His eyes were shifted into an angry disappointed look. It was a look showing me that I was gonna get it when I get home. Now I’ve done it. I took my hand out of my underwear. He went behind his desk and pulled out his phone. I got a text from him and I opened it.

Daddy❤️: You wanna play with fire, so that’s what I’ll give you.

I gasped and looked up at him. “Your ass is fucking mine.” He mouthed at me. I whimpered and replied back.

“I’m sorry!! Please Please Please forgive me!!”

He didn’t reply back and he continued with grading papers as all of the other students were working on math and talking among themselves. Why did I do this? I regret every moment.

After the school day was over, I ran to the car to where he was. He got in the car without saying a word to me. I panicked. “Jaehyun-“ “Shut up. You say one more word and you piss me off more.” He said looking at me with fiery eyes. I put my head down. He started the car and sped off out of the school parking lot.

We made it home and my heart thumped hard in my chest. “Get your ass in here.” He ordered getting out of the car. He slammed the door behind him and walked up to the front door. I followed behind him, with tears streaming down my face. He opened the door and I followed in. He shut the door and he picked me up and slammed me against the wall.

His hand went around my throat. “Daddy..please..” I begged. “Aww now you wanna beg? You can forget about my mercy any time soon..” He growled. “I’m sorry...” I said. “Your pathetic ass apology is not working.” He said. He whispered down in my ear. “You will feel nothing but torture...” I gulped and whimpered at his words.

“OOHHH DADDY PLEASE!!” I cried out. My hands were tied to the bed, my dress ripped open at the front, his hands are prying my legs open as he fucked me at brutal pace. Tears were streaming down my face. I was now at my fourth orgasm.

“Turn around.” He growled. I turned onto my knees. He forced my face into the pillow. He ripped my dress at the back of it and threw it somewhere in the room. He bent down to my ear. “Do you think you’ve learned your lesson?” He whispered. I whimpered and nodded my head.

He yanked my hair hardly and he landed a strong and hard smack on my butt, causing me to jerk forward and cry. “You better use your goddamn mouth, Y/n. I’m not playing right now.” He growled. “Y-YES!! FUCK YESS!” I screamed. “I don’t think so..” he tsked. He slammed into me without warning and started at a rude pace.

He growled and smacked me on my ass again. “You’re so damn disrespectful. And you think you deserve me stopping?” He asked. I cried at his words. I knew was a bad girl today, and I know what I’ve done. At first I was enjoying this so much but now, It was true torture. My heat was way too sore and my legs and arms had bruises from where he gripped me at. I had hickies all over my body and I just couldn’t take it anymore.

“Daddy! DADDY STOP! STOP PLEASE PLEASE STOP!! I-IT HURTS! IM IN PAIN!” I screamed as I cried. His actions stopped all together and reached to quickly untie me. I silently cried as he pulled out me and took me in his arms. “I’m sorry...I’m so so sorry. I went too far.” He whispered. He looked at my body and seen all of bruises.

He placed kisses on my bruises and carefully turned me around. He seen my messy face from my makeup and the red markings on my neck. He looked in my eyes and looked in his. He was broken, he was hurt. My eyes were bloodshot red from my tears and they were clouded with pain.

He kissed me passionately and whispered to me. “I’m sorry Y/n. I-I didn’t mean to be this hard on you. I messed up big time, I know..” He ran a finger over my neck and winced in pain. “Ouch...” I yelped. He hurried and pulled up his pants and picked me up carefully and carrying me our bathroom.

He placed me on the counter and pulled out a kit. He started to heal my bruises. “J-Jae..This hurts!” I whimpered. “I know, I know. I’m sorry..” He whispered while rubbing my hand in comforting way. After this, he walked over to the bathtub and ran a bath. He took my hair bow and tied my hair up into a ponytail. After the water was filled, he placed me inside of it.

I whined at the burn of my bruises when I came in contact with the water. He took my body wash and my wash cloth and cleaned me. He washed my hair and massaged my sore scalp. He hummed a song, making me feel sleepy and soo much better. He wiped of my messy face and kissed all over it.

After we were done with bathtub, he wrapped me in the towel and walked to the closet. “I’ll be back, stay right here..” He whispered. I nodded my head with a yawn. He came back with one of his button up shirts and my pink fur slippers. He took the towel off of me and slipped the shirt on my body. He buttoned it up and put my slippers on me.

His hand brushed over the bottom of my foot, making me giggle and pull my foot back. He smiled up at me and did it again. I laughed pulling my foot away. “Stop it, Daddy..” I said. He laughed and kissed my ankle, finishing putting my slipper on. I hopped of the counter into his arms and he carried me back to the bed. The bed was made up and it had extra pillows on it.

With me still in his arms, he sat down on the bed by the headboard and laid me beside him on the pillows. He grabbed the TV remote and turned on the TV. “I wanna watch Disney+..” I mumbled. He turned it to one of my favorite childhood movies and watched the movie with me.

“You’re such a big baby at heart.” He smiled. I giggled at his words. After a while, I felt way much better. I remembered our past moments just now. Now that I’m thinking about it, I remembered how...sexy he really looked. The way he was angry and man handling me was so attractive and it turned me on again.

I then realized...HE NEVER CAME! Oh my god, I have to make it up to him. I peeked up at him and seen that he wasn’t paying me no attention. I shifted and grabbed a hold of his belt, about to unbuckle it. He took my hand and kissed it. “No.” He said. I gave him a pout.

“What?” I asked. “You’re not making it up to me. Not like this.” He said. I sighed. “But, I got to cum and you didn’t...” I said. He sighed. “We’re not having sex for a while.” He said. “Why? What did I do?” I asked sitting up. “It wasn’t you, it was me. Seeing you in pain like that was heartbreaking for me. I went wayy too hard on you.” He explained. “B-But...” I crawled onto his lap and kissed him on his lips. “Please..” I whispered. He kissed me again and put me off of his lap.

“Baby..no. Let’s just lay off the sex for a while..just you and me. Nothing else.” He said. I nodded and laid down. I sighed and turned over. “Hey..” He called. He turned me around and placed a kiss on my lips. “I love you..” He whispered. “I love you too.” I replied with a smile.

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