#prank thor

[telvess]

I want these two to start interacting with each other!

We had the perfect opportunity in the last chapter. Instead I got another "..." from my man!

#come on loki #prank thor #i know you want to

[cat-cosplay]

Thor Odinsnek

#april fools day #april fools #snake #thor #thor odinson #snek #nope rope #cw #joke #prank #marvel

[tarithenurse]

Help me

Fandom: MCU Pairing/starring: Thor Odinson &/x Avenger!fem!reader Word count: 1594 Content: Plotting/scheming and carrying out pranks, drinking, some pining and fluffy confessions of love. A/N: I’m not sure where this came from but I hope you guys like it :) Betaed by my lovely TanteFrutsel-CreativeNurse.

Help me

You’re bored, having had no missions for a while. Your normal three victims for pranks are all gone on their own businesses but you know Loki is bound to return within a day so now is your chance to get him for the flour in your pockets.

Tiptoeing down the tower’s hallway, your arms are full of rolls of cling wrap.

You settle the tools for your prank beside you as you kneel before the door, knowing better than to expect the Trickster God to leave his door unlocked or untrapped. Using every skill in your arsenal (most taught by Natasha and Loki himself, ironically), you investigate the lock and handle, unlocking the door before moving on to the door itself. Deeply engrossed in the task at hand, you hear the sound of nearing footsteps too late.

“What are you doing?” Thor’s voice rumbles behind you, making your heart stutter from the shock of having been caught as well as your usual crush on the god.

On hands and knees, ass up in the air, you’ve been trying to squint beneath the door for fear of a trigger to some trap and now you don’t dare to glance over your shoulder. “N-nothing?”

“Lady [Y/N], are you breaking into my brother’s chamber?” There’s a brief moment in which he clearly takes the scene in fully. “With...the wrapping from the kitchen? Why?” He truly sounds confounded.

Sighing, you get up from your exposed position, concerned that there are no traps that you can spot but now having to deal with the big brother. “Just...can we pretend you didn’t see anything?” You look up into his electric blue eyes that are beginning to hide under furrowed brows.

“Is this one of your pranks?” he asks with a serious tone but you can see a little smile tug at the corner of his mouth.

A sudden thought spurs you on, forcing its way past your shy love for the blond god: “Wanna help me? I’m gonna wrap everything in cling wrap.”

The little grimace turns into a veritable grin. “I am pleased that you ask.”

You allow Thor to push the door open and you’re pleasantly surprised that nothing happens as he enters beyond.

Loki’s abode is themed in his signature colours: bottle green and gold. The bed is opulent with its canopy and it functions as the centrepiece of the room despite the large, comfy chair and all the bookcases. The rug ties all of it together and brings your attention to the old-fashioned desk on the other side of the room. In other words: there are plenty of things to wrap. Smiling shyly to your new conspirator, you hand over a roll and set to work.

...

Even with Thor helping, it takes a while before everything is wrapped – you’d decided to wrap the items lying around individually too and that included the clothes in Loki’s closet and his toiletries but at least you’d opted out of doing each book in the bookcases. Thor had been a big help reaching the higher places (sometimes by lifting you onto his shoulders which had set your heart racing all over again).

Now you look at the result, admiring the glistening layer on everything which you know will drive Loki mad.

“We should get a drink to celebrate,” Thor grins at you over his shoulder as he bends to pick up the empty rolls from the cling wrap.

You’d like that. Literally any excuse to spend more time with him would be agreeable to you.

...

You’re well through your umpteenth mojito when Thor interrupts his own tale of past exploits on the battlefield (and your inner musings on your adoration for him) to look over at you with a puzzled look.

“What?” you hiccup, your usual reservations long gone.

“Midgardians do not hold their drinks well,” he muses which you take slight offence at – only slight because you do feel the couch tilting beneath you.

With a floomp you fall sideways, with your head near Thor, and grin up at him. “What makes you say that?”

“Do you not realize what you have just said?”

“I said...’What’...” Your brows wrinkle as you try to remember anything you might have said before that but come up empty.

Deciding that you’re lying uncomfortably (and missing your drink), you struggle to get back to an upright position and you’re thankful for Thor’s help once more but as you reach out for your glass, he pushes it aside.

“Lady [Y/N]...I think you have had enough...”

Gingerly, he scoops you up in his arms, ignoring your pouting, and carries you to your room where he places you gently on the bed. It’s heavenly soft and you immediately snuggle up. Then you make up your mind, scoot a bit to the side and pat the bed next to you.

“I wanna hear the rest of your story,” you declare.

“Tomorrow,” Thor assures you, gently stroking your cheek.

“Aw but...but...what if I ask nicely?” you try again. His smile is dazzling but it’s evident that your hope will be dashed and you power on: “Like...if I come with a really good argument, will you stay here?”

He tilts his head like a big golden retriever. “And what could you say to impose on you in your current state?”

“It would make me happy if you stayed? I’d be sad and have to cry myself to sleep if you left?”

He sighs, “well we cannot have that.” The mattress dips as he gets in, his head on your spare pillow and legs crossed at the ankles while he laces his fingers over his toned abs. The man truly is a god. “Do you think you can find rest now?”

You contemplate the question, slowly tumbling the words through your hazy brain and coming to the conclusion that it could be even better. Resolutely, you roll over and slap your head onto his chest, an arm wrapped around his abdomen.

“Now I can.”

And sleep truly is already finding you, spurred on by the alcohol. Only a few moments go by before the world grows soft and fuzzy as sleep weighs you down, barely leaving you time to mutter a slurred ‘I love you’ before your eyes finally drift shut.

...

Peeling your eyes open, you’re happy that the sun can only barely peek past the curtains, leaving the room in shadows which are soothing for your headache. You also realize two things: the first one is that you’re fully clothed which is not a typical way for you to sleep, and the second is that you’re practically glued to someone else...and yeah, you know exactly who this person is.

Craning your neck, you look up through a slight haze and find Thor gazing back at you.

Memories come rushing back in a big jumble that you try to sort through and something tells you that you shouldn’t be surprised. He carried you to your room?

“You stayed?” you croak with a parched throat.

He smiles gently. “You asked me to...and then, frankly, you held on too tight for me to be able to leave.”

You’re mortified but it only gets worse the more you remember. And didn’t you...oh fuck. A memory laced with sleep makes itself known and removes your attention from the physical discomfort. Three small words that escaped as you drifted off, finally breaking free of their confinements that had kept them secret for so long. Maybe it’s just a dream...or a nightmare, really.

Searching Thor’s face, you can see something has shifted, though. He seems nervous, breath baited and the hand that rests on your back is trembling ever so slightly.

“I do not know if...if you...” he’s searching for the right words, “you said something before...”

“Before I fell asleep?” you wince and he nods, taking away your last hope that maybe you haven’t betrayed yourself.

He squirms, clearly as uncomfortable with the situation as you are. Oh fuck, he hates me now. Needing distance, you detach yourself from his side. Your plan is to roll away from him, to get up...preferably to walk away for forever. But his large hand engulfs your wrist – not tight enough that you couldn't break away, but the gesture is enough to stop you. Still, you can't face him, afraid of what you might learn if meeting his gaze.

“Please, lady [Y/N]...” there’s a quiver to his voice, “I must know if those were merely drunk warbles or if...if I stand a chance...”

Stand a chance? His choice of words makes you finally seek out his electric blue eyes and you find a flicker of something you’ve never noticed before but in retrospect has always been there: adoration. Love?

Hope blooms within you. “I...I love you,” you whisper.

“Norns be blessed!” he gasps. His face nearly splits in a huge grin. “This means that my feelings for you are not unrequited. [Y/N]...please know that my heart belongs to you, now and forever.”

You gape at him for a moment, trying to fathom what he’s just said and eventually managing to come to the only possible conclusion. A shy smile curls your lips. All the dread that had filled you moments before is gone, replaced by a surge of warm joy that makes you move up flush to the god who happily wraps you in his arms. A kiss lands on your forehead and you chase his lips with your own, knowing that you finally can have the real thing and not just a daydream.

#Thor #thor odinson #Thor mcu #thor x you #thor x reader #thor x female reader #x you #x reader #x fem!reader #thor x fem!reader #pranks #pining #love confessions #fluff #mcu fanfiction #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #fanfiction #fanfic #writing

[kamydrawstuffs]

Taskmaster- "Just A Small Prank"

(Comic) Taskmaster and Black Ant just having their little fun while Thor is getting drunk.

#taskmaster #black ant #marvel #tasky #tony masters #eric o'grady #thor #god #comic #cute #funny #prank

[worstloki]

Loki returning to the main timeline only to get an eyeful of not only Thor's bare backside but also that terrible memorial tattoo:

#Thor 4 #like i'm sorry but in my head that tattoo is the helmet a broken heart a parchment and a quill and R.I.P. Loki #like m8 either that's a prank Loki pulled and Thor doesn't mind it or Thor absolutely regrets having it done with a token defending of it

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #279: COMMAND DECISION

May, 1987

WHO Will Lead The Avengers?

Well, you’ve got some very good options and also Doctor Druid here.

This is a pretty solid roster, and Doctor Druid. I notice that the roster box on the cover has updated to reflect the post-Siege team.

But with Wasp going on a well-deserved vacation, who will lead?

The funny thing about the question is that in the issue, its not much of a contest. Not many of the team actually wants to take the top job.

But who do YOU, the viewer, think will lead the Avengers and Doctor Druid? Print your answer on a self-addressed 8x10 card and put it under your pillow. There’s no reason to do this.

ANYWAY:

Last times in Avengers: the Masters of Evil seized Avengers Mansion and tried to destroy the team. The Mansion is a pile of firewood now, more or less. And Hercules is in a coma. Namor is somewhere in the ocean being sad about his monster girlfriend instead of being thrilled at having a monster girlfriend. And Wasp wants a break.

So Thor, She-Hulk, and Doctor Druid re/join the team. Captains America and Marvel hold over from the previous roster.

A giant fishman named Tyrak attacks Hydrobase, looking for Namor but the Avengers manage to defeat him through the judicious application of swords and infrared radiation. Fishmen hate those things.

With that sorted out, all that remains is to decide who will take over for Wasp.

Hah. Command decision. Clever title.

And now,

a hostage situation.

A man in Atlanta called Joshua Lanning has been hearing voices and the voices have been telling him that his family is demons.

Not great.

Thankfully, Captain Marvel is passing by and pops down to see what’s going on.

The cop police on site has no time for Monica. Because: its still a thing that people outside of New York don’t really take superheroes seriously. This guy sees a woman in a garish costume and tells her he has no time for trick or treat.

So Monica is like okay and neutrinos into the house.

Reasonably, a jumpy dude with a gun who is sure there are demons everywhere that only he can see reacts excitedly to a woman suddenly appearing out of nowhere.

Also reasonably, Captain Marvel appeared in her hologram form so as not to get shot.

Joshua is stunned that shooting her a bunch didn’t do anything and jumps to the conclusion that Monica is an angel!

She neither confirms nor denies.

Captain Marvel: “I’m a friend who’s come to help you... to keep you from doing wrong. Get up off your knees and come with me. I’ll take you to people who will help you!”

Joshua Lanning: “Yes, I must follow the light to salvation! The light will lead the way!”

So she gets Joshua to turn himself over to the authorities.

And then she comforts the kids who aren’t really sure what’s going on.

Annie: “The man said papa is sick.”

Captain Marvel: “That’s right, Annie. He has to go away, to get better. While he’s gone, your mother’s going to need all the love and help you can give.”

There doesn’t seem to ever be follow-up on this family.

Shame. In all the up and downs in public opinion that superheroes and the Avengers have, it’d be nice to hear from someone Monica helped just by talking and also by being bulletproof and glowy.

At the least, Monica has impressed these random Atlanta cops with her actions. One of them saying that until now he thought everything he was hearing about Captain Marvel was just hot air and the other saying that the whole family probably would have died if she hadn’t happened by.

Meanwhile, in New Orleans, parents Frank and Maria Rambeau are sitting and watching tv when Captain Marvel appears on the screen.

She controls the horizontal and the vertical.

Its not plot important, I just think its a neat use of her power.

She beamed into the tv as VHF-radio waves and waited for the commercial so she could imitate a PSA in case her parents had anyone over.

Maria Rambeau: “Mind? Child, you’re the best thing to come over that set... oh... at least, since the Odd Couple was cancelled!”

Monica’s powers are incredibly handy.

Anyway, Monica decides to get her parents’ take on the leadership crisis afflicting the Avengers.

Its nice that she can be open with her parents about whats happening in her superhero life but is she allowed to just tell her parents everything that happens in meetings?

I guess so!

So, at the meeting that last issue ended off with, Doctor Druid is voted in as a new member of the Avengers. Wasp nominated him and the Avengers tend to just accept whoever is standing nearby when they need new members so, yeah, not surprised. It fits the pattern.

Its when Cap(tain America) opens the floor for chairperson nominations that things get spicy.

Captain Marvel nominates Captain America because Wasp left him in charge and he’s very qualified for the job. I hear he has leadership experience.

But Cap(tain America) declines the job because he’s got his own solo ongoing with its own ongoing plot and this is the time in Marvel where that meant something.

Nowadays, Black Panther can get lost in space for an extended period of time during which he loses his memories and it doesn’t seem to affect his ability to lead the Avengers.

I blame Wolverine really.

Being on three teams and having his own solo adventures and guest starring roles and crossovers and the fans ate it up.

You ruined the tight continuity, Logan!

Captain America: “My obligations to my nationwide telephone hotline don’t leave me the time needed to devote to leading the Avengers. Besides, we have another excellent choice on the team... Captain Marvel, I nominate you!”

Excellent decision Cap. She doesn’t have leadership experience but on the other hand, I like her.

Black Knight seconds the nomination based on Monica taking charge during Secret Wars II while Wasp was missing and Captain America got Beyondernapped.

Also, she managed to get Hercules and Namor to behave and that’s an accomplishment.

Captain Marvel: “I’m honored... and I do want to lead the Avengers someday... but, I’m not sure I’m ready.”

Now to mention having the nomination sprung on her made Monica feel anxious.

And makes her uneasy because Doctor Druid is staring daggers at her, thinking “The things I could accomplish, were I to lead the Avengers! If only new members were allowed to take office during their probationary period... but, no matter. I shall bide my time.”

My cursed future knowledge senses are tingling.

Thor also has his own ongoing with his own ongoing plot concerns, like being under a can’t-heal-can’t-die curse that will eventually reduce him to flesh goo pooled at the bottom of his spiffy new outfit.

But he also wants to get this show on the road and given that the one person nominated so far doesn’t seem certain, Thor throws his own name onto the table.

And hey, he’s got leadership experience coming out the wazoo. He’s qualified to lead the Avengers. It’s not much of a thing today when everything is the tug of war between Steve and Tony but Thor used to be a frequent chairman of the team.

She-Hulk objects because she feels like Thor is trying to discourage Monica so he can have the job. In fact, hey, she thinks he’s bullying Monica!

And Thor doesn’t like her tone and Cap has to bang the leadership gavel and tell everyone to calm down.

Since things got acrimonious, Cap(tain America) decided to table the discussion until the next meeting. Which helpfully gives Monica time to sort out her feelings on whether she wants to accept the nomination or not.

Her parents are immediately supportive of her taking the job.

Frank Rambeau: “You’ll be great! Even Captain America thinks so! Captain America! Dang! You can’t turn down an endorsement like that!”

Captain Marvel: “I don’t know, daddy. The chance to lead is something I’ve dreamed of since before I went into law enforcement. But I never expected an opportunity like this so soon.”

Maria Rambeau: “But you’ve always been a quick study, Monica.”

A quick sidebar but maybe the Avengers should have like. More opportunities where someone is put in charge of a smaller group of the team to do a mission or task but basically let them get field experience leading.

Because otherwise, the title is going to get bounced back and forth between the same people who always have it because they’re the only ones who get a chance to get that leadership experience.

Wasp had to basically girlboss a meeting while everyone was feeling awkward about her divorce to get the chance to lead and she did great at it. But if she hadn’t been pushy, would she have ever gotten the chance?

Would Monica now if Tony wasn’t off with the West Coast team and Cap and Thor busy with their ongoings?

Start a membership program, the Avengers!

Anyway.

Monica also brings up that whole subplot where she wants to start her own business because if she takes on the chairwoman position, she won’t have time to do business.

Frank argues that Monica can start her business any time but Maria realizes (because I think she and Monica are in cahoots) that part of Monica’s business plan is to get Frank to take an early retirement from the fire department and go into business with Monica, so he won’t be running into flaming buildings and worrying everyone.

But Mom Rambeau is also torn between wanting the secret business plan to get her husband into something less dangerous and wanting Monica to live her best life so she just tells her to take her time and make the decision that’s right for everyone.

Meanwhile, She-Hulk is realizing that the Avengers leasing an island means the Avengers BASICALLY have a private beach.

AND SHE IS ALL OVER THAT.

Especially because its a decent beach and thus she throws shade at New York’s beaches.

She spots Black Knight already on the beach doing some anime level cutting a thing and having it only fall apart later exercise.

Its about training precision, apparently.

He cuts a granite boulder without disturbing it so he can lightly tap it later and have it fall apart.

Plus, it looks cool.

If the major thing you’re bringing to a team is ‘owns incredibly cursed sword’ you might as well practice sweet anime moves.

She-Hulk decides sweet anime moves are sweet but lets talk plot and pivots the conversation over to whether Captain Marvel will accept the chairwoman nomination.

Black Knight hopes so because she seems the best candidate to him. He doesn’t want it, Cap doesn’t want it, and She-Hulk doesn’t want Thor to have it. Because in fairness to Thor, she finds him too high-and-mighty to take orders from.

Heck, if Captain Marvel doesn’t run, She-Hulk will. Just so Thor can’t have it.

Damn, Jen, Thor’s been team leader before and done an okay job!

She-Hulk: “I mean, how hard could it be? A leader has to be able to delegate and to think fast... I can do that!”

Anyway, political discussion aggros Dr Druid.

Like, he literally just appears out of the surf when She-Hulk and Black Knight are talking about the chairmanship.

This is why people think you’re a creep, Dr Druid.

Speaking of appearing out of nowhere, a giant... gorilla... thing? appears on the beach.

She-Hulk tries to tackle the beach gorilla but falls right through it.

Because it was a psychic illusion that Dr Druid planted in She-Hulk’s brain.

Y’know. As a prank.

Dammit, Dr Druid, don’t make me like you!

Because, like, look. Him pulling a beach prank is the most human thing he’s done so far.

She-Hulk takes it in “good” spirit.

She-Hulk: “Funny, doc... r-e-a-l funny. Didn’t know you had it in you. I enjoy a good gag as much as anyone! But watch your step... you might not like my sense of humor!”

Oh please, please, please let this lead to a prank war within the Avengers.

Meanwhile, elsewhere, Captain Marvel decides to visit the prison war of the central New Jersey hospital where Moonstone is being held after she broke her neck flying into a cliff.

Monica feels bad about that whole thing but Moonstone immediately launches into a rant.

She accuses Monica of being here to gloat, blames Monica for her broken neck, and blames Zemo for how things turned out because by god if she ran the zoo!

Monica loses her patience and tells Moonstone that flying into the cliff was her own darn fault.

Captain Marvel: “A fine leader you’d be... always ready to blame someone else! Goodbye, Moonstone! You’ll heal -- but with your attitude you’ll never be well!”

and thinks: “I’ve met too many people like her. They want all the flash and glory that come with power, but none of the responsibilities. How does a person get that way? Visiting Moonstone was a waste of sympathy! There are others much more worthy of my time!”

One of the people more worthy of her time: Hercules, at Manhattan Newhope Memorial Hospital.

Yes, he’s still in a coma.

Chill out, it hasn’t been a day since the last time we saw him.

Monica talks to the comatose Hercules, telling him about Wasp stepping down and Captain America nominating her (Monica) to the position. Wondering aloud whether Hercules would follow another woman leading the Avengers. Whether he could follow any mortal for long.

Eventually, Monica flies off somewhere else to think and misses comatose Hercules saying something in I presume Greek.

If google translate is of any use, what he’s saying is “father.”

Calling a Zeus.

Elsewhere, Monica arrives at Roxxon oil tower #25, the place where she got her powers a few months ago.

Wow, that timescale!

She recaps to herself getting passed over for a captaincy promotion in the boat police, how old family friend Professor LeClare asked her with a South American dictator that was using his research to make a super weapon, how the whole situation ended up FUBAR’d and Monica punched a science machine to stop the super weapon, and was caught in an explosion that gave her powers.

Captain Marvel: “Not long afterward, I met the Avengers... and I’ve been going non-stop ever since! I’ve helped rescue the president... traveled to the Moon, the Sun, and other galaxies... I’ve seen and done things I couldn’t even have imagined a year before! I can accomplish more good in a week as an Avenger, than ‘Lt. Rambeau’ could in a lifetime. But all that good hasn’t come without a price.”

“Being an Avenger is so... consuming! I’ve been on call 24 hours a day. My private life has already dropped to almost nil. What would happen if I were to become chairwoman? I’m starting to realize why the Wasp needed a vacation... and why Cap doesn’t have time to take over full time. Whoever chairs the Avengers has so many responsibilities! Can anything be worth that kind of stress? I’d better have a long talk with someone who’s been there!”

Hm... I hadn’t realized it until Monica just up and said it but I do wish she had more of a supporting cast. Some civilian friends. I do like that she has her parents to talk to.

Now that its been brought up that Monica needs a better supporting cast, I hope she gets a better supporting cast.

Didn’t she have a thing with Agent Freeman? He could be a supporting cast. A love interest or something.

But she probably also needs a non-super friend. Even though She-Hulk is on the team now and she’s a super super friend.

Over at Kozak’s Cavern, a cave high in the Appalachian Mountains, Captain America.

He’s here to save six children and a guide who were trapped in the cavern after an earthquake.

Now Captain America may not have great super powers but he can use his shield as a shovel.

Also, peak human stats but I don’t know if that’s been established yet.

Jokes aside, he heard there was trouble and he came to help because that’s the guy Captain America is.

As soon as the rescue effort clears a hole big enough for a single beefy man, Captain America squeezes through to go look for the trapped people while the rest of the rescuers down under this mountain keep working to enlarge the opening.

And since this is a Captain Marvel focus issue, she shows up to talk to Cap(tain America) and also help once she learns there’s a situation ongoing.

Monica flies ahead to light the way and finds the trapped group.

Soon, Cap and a very bright Monica are leading the group towards the exit.

There’s another tremor though and the ground collapses under two of the children. They wind up on a rock hanging out over a chasm.

Captain Monica goes down (because she can fly) to help boost the kids up to Captain America who is hanging upside down from the ledge above.

They get kid one Joey rescued but kid two Bobbi Sue panics.

Bobbi Sue: “No... please don’t make me! Please!”

Captain Marvel: “I know you’re scared, honey, but you have to do this! Ever climbed a tree?”

Bobbi Sue: “Yes’m!”

Captain Marvel: “Then pretend that I’m a big ol’ friendly tree! Will you do that for me?”

Bobbi Sue: “Ah’ll try.”

But when Monica starts to boost Bobbi Sue, the rock they were standing on collapses into the chasm.

Leaving Monica hanging onto the cliffside with a child on her shoulders.

And probably lamenting that her powers don’t let her fly as her meat self and that she can’t hold anything when she’s made of energy.

I guess the ability to move at the speed of light and broadcast yourself onto television is a consolation but it would be neat to just pick up child and fly to safety.

(But: its also a limitation to Monica’s powers that keep her from being all-powerful so you have ways to write tension into scenes with her)

Speaking of limitations to Monica’s powers, she needs to be conscious to use them.

Monica manages to pass Bobbi Sue up to Captain America but the little foothold she has crumbles underneath her and a rock bonks her in the head.

Captain Marvel plummets into the void.

But nah, she recovers before the bottom and nyooms back up as Shiny Monica.

Hah. Monica the Many Colored.

Anyway, she leads the group out of the cave.

Cap(tain America) tells Captain Marvel that if she hadn’t showed up, he might not have rescued these cave kids.

The whole experience really made up Monica’s mind about whether the pressures of leadership were worth it and she tells Cap(tain America) that she accepts his nomination.

Woo, the Captain Marvel run Avengers!

Oh and one last thing:

A shadowy figure sneaks into Newhope Memorial Hospital and godnaps the comatose Hercules.

And by a shadowy figure I mean that’s definitely Batman.

Dammit, Batman! Stick to your own universe!

Follow @essential-avengers​ in memory of Hercules. Like and reblog, for Captain Marvel!

#essential avengers #essential marvel liveblogging #avengers #seismic activity #Black Knight #Captain America #Captain Marvel #Monica Rambeau #Doctor Druid #for some reason #She Hulk #Thor #Monica's supporting cast #soul searching #beach pranking #Hercules #is also there

[stinkfacestories]

Thor, what are your favorite ways of pranking someone with your gas?

Thor: A trick i learned from Hercules several hundred years ago. Find someone and tell them you have a unique combat move that can counter them, or tell them you want to show them a new way to get out of a grapple. Get them in position so that their head is as close to your buttocks as possible and then say: "alright, ready, the trick is... Getting you into this position because I have to fart". Then, of course because you are the strongest avenger, you hold them in place and proceed to fart until you have had your fun

#thor love and farts #ask thor #at 2 #tricks for pranking

[threefandomsinatrenchcoat]

Thor doesn't know Peter can pick up his hammer, Peter uses it to prank him on a huge scale. It gets to the point where Thor is convinced Mjölnir is sentient and following him

#mcu #peter parker #writing inspiration #writing prompt #thor #pranks #mjölnir

[coffeecubes]

"𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐝𝐠𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬!"

𝗵𝗰𝘀 + 𝘀𝗰𝗲𝗻𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗼: 𝗱𝗼𝗱𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗸𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝗽𝗿𝗮𝗻𝗸? 𝗦𝘂𝗿𝗲𝗹𝘆… 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗴𝗼 𝘄𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴… 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁?

✩ 𝗳𝗹𝘂𝗳𝗳 | 𝗵𝗮𝗱𝗲𝘀, 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿, 𝗽𝗼𝘀𝗲𝗶𝗱𝗼𝗻, 𝗯𝘂𝗱𝗱𝗵𝗮, 𝗾𝗶𝗻 𝘀𝗵𝗶 𝗵𝘂𝗮𝗻𝗴 𝘅 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿

✩ 𝗿𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝘆 𝗰𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗼𝗽𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲

✩ 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: 𝗻𝗼𝗻𝗲! 𝗘𝗻𝗷𝗼𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗹𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀! 𝗠𝘆 𝗤𝘂𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘃 𝗮𝗰𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘆𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘂𝗻𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗳𝗳

𝐇𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐒

Imagine his confusion when you dodge his kiss

A bit hurt but tries to kiss you again

You dodge him once again, making his face turn to horror as if Poseidon had said he was the worst older brother ever to his face

Hades, who had fallen in love with you, was always a gentleman. The first time he saw you, he knew that you were going to be his wife. He treated you as his equal, his woman, and his queen all at once. He was gentle, patient, loving, and so protective of you, making sure to respect you as who you are. He was one of the few gods who physically showed how much he loved and cherished you, which was rare in the divine. 

He introduced things to you slowly, making sure to go at your pace since he didn’t want to hurt or scare you away. Showing affection and kisses in small moments was one thing that he adored, since it showed connection and strong desire for one another.

There was a trend going on lately where lovers would dodge each other’s kisses as a prank, and you thought it would be funny to try it on your husband, who was so heavenly in love with you. It was just a small teasing but your heart absolutely shattered when you saw his face fall.

“Love?” Hades tilted his head, his strong arms coming to grasp your waist once you dodged again. 

Hades didn’t think this was funny at all as he pulled you onto his lap. He turned you over so you were facing him before he placed his head above your chest.

“Did I do something wrong?” he pouted, his handsome face turning sadder in each second and you couldn’t take it anymore.

“No! It was just a prank, that’s all!” you explained everything to him and suddenly it all made sense.

“Well… shall I try again?” Hades’ mood brightened up as he attempted to kiss you once more, and you happily obliged.

Now, he’s carrying you to his bedroom where he’s going to punish you for teasing him 😉

Poseidon later came to visit his brother and his sister-in-law until he heard the noise coming from the bedroom and he left

𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑

He leans in to give you a kiss but you dodged, making him kiss nothing but air

He stills for a few moments before he opens his eyes with confusion and he whips around to see you resuming to your own routines

You felt extremely bad as you felt his eyes upon your figure, as the thunder god wonders if you are mad at him

The thunder god never showed any sort of affection or emotion to anyone, so imagine the shock of the entire heavens when rumours had it that he had fallen in love with you. He wasn’t social and didn’t have many friends despite how powerful he was but the moment you came into his life, it brought another side out of him. He wanted nothing but to spend his immortal life with you, enjoying the sweet comforts of your presence, listening to your stories, and relishing your touches, kisses and love.

Affection was something he never knew he lacked in his life until he met you, and your small kisses were one of the very things that always made his busy day better. He was extremely occupied these days with his duties so he didn’t get to spend much time with you, making him wonder if you were pissed at him. 

You were already regretting your actions and you should never have listened to Loki’s stupid prank. Thor was good to you but that dumb trickster had decided it would be funny to see his cousin’s reaction to his wife not wanting to kiss him. 

“My sweet…” Thor’s voice echoed down the corridors, as you scurried away from him.

His loud footsteps followed your smaller form, as guilt began to bottle you up. You can feel the hurt and sadness radiating off of his body and it got worse when he grabbed your arm gently to stop you.

“Are you mad at me?” the god asked as you refused to answer to keep Loki’s prank going.

You thought you could do it until he pulled you into a tight embrace, apologising to you.

“I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”

That’s it.

You whipped around and cupped his cheeks, explaining everything to him, telling him that Loki told you to do it because he wanted to see his reaction. Thor was obviously pissed at Loki and he was about to go beat him up when you grabbed his face once more and kissed him lovingly. You two made out in the halls for a little while until his bloodthirsty battle smirk came out.

He throws you over his shoulder and carries you to the private chambers, where you two will make up for all the lost time when you were apart 😍

Loki got a black eye after

𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐈𝐃𝐎𝐍

You have a death wish if you have the audacity to dodge his kiss

He was mad, like really mad, as he grabs you by your chin and holds you in place to kiss you but you deny him by biting your lips in

He never felt anything ill towards you but for the first time, there was this bitter and hurt feeling that boiled up in his chest as his cold eyes glared into your own

It was an understatement that Poseidon was a terrifying god. Of all the divine, he had the most power, authority, and presence of all the gods and he was ruthless in his approach. He looked down on others and even deemed them as filth if they didn't reach his standards. He doesn’t talk to the lowly and his emotions seem non-existent.

Until he met you.

When you first transferred to his castle to work for him, he felt as if cupid’s arrow had cruelly decided to pierce him and for the first time, this god wanted someone. He wanted someone to stand by his side, someone to rule with, and someone to love. 

Poseidon was cruel to everyone in his fortress but when it came to you, he tried to soften up and treat you less harshly. He was still critical and blunt, but you soon realised that he was giving you advice and helping you improve. Pretty soon, you two were together and now married. He would also show gentle gestures such as caressing your cheeks, holding your hand, and embracing you to show others who had their eyes on you that you belonged to him - and him ALONE. 

When you two were alone, Poseidon showed a side to you that you didn’t think he had as he treated you and your body with such grace and gentleness. He was rough in bed as well but it felt as if he was telling you that you were his everything, his precious goddess who stole his heart.

And now, Poseidon was on thin ice with you as he slammed the door shut and placed his hand above your head, trapping you beneath his large body. 

“What’s going on?” he sneered at you, “you don’t want me anymore?”

You were going to kill Aphrodite later for blackmailing you into this.

“Poseidon, no! I do want you!” you told him truthfully, “it’s just that Aphrodite…”

The moment you said that lustful goddess’ name made Poseidon’s face darken. He huffed angrily and brushed his blond hair, feeling his anger snap. You were a nervous wreck as you tried to walk past him until he took you by the chin and slammed his lips into yours. You kissed him back and sooner or later, he was on top of you in bed, making sure that you gave him the kisses he deserved. 

You two had fun that night, Poseidon made sure you were sore the next day 😈

Aphrodite was banned from talking to you ever again

𝐁𝐔𝐃𝐃𝐇𝐀

Imagine the shock pikachu face as you dodge his kiss, his jaw dropping to the ground like a heavy stone

His lollipop fell from his mouth and you try not to snicker as you walked passed him

Not a single word was spoken out either, while the feeling of being heartbroken stabbed him like a blade

Buddha was a god that took no shits from anyone. He was true to himself, he was enlightened, and he was proud to guide others into a path where they could also achieve enlightenment. That’s why he became so fond of you.

He adored and fell in love with you because you gave no shits to anyone. You didn’t let the hardships and suffering of the things around you bring you down, instead you found new ways to conquer them and achieve happiness. Buddha adored and loved being by your side. He particularly loved cuddling with you on top of hills, munching on little snacks and tears, while being lovey dovey with each other. 

Buddha was always a tease to you because he loved seeing how flustered and shy you get, your facial impressions were one of the top things he enjoyed. But recently, he seemed to be getting over your boundaries with his teasing. You’re usually fine with his teasing but this time, Buddha just won’t leave it alone. Usually he would drop it and apologise afterwards, even kissing and caressing your figure, but this time, he was persistent.

So of course, you decided to get back at the enlightened one, turning your head away and walking away from him. Buddha’s jaw dropped to the ground in shock as he whipped around, seeing your figure walk away.

He, of course, went after you.

“(Name)... my love?” he questioned, pouncing on you.

His legs were wrapped around your waist with his hands hugging your chest, as he cling to you like a koala. Because of his heavier weight, you tumbled to the ground, with him straddling on top of your waist. He tried to kiss you once more, but you dodged, making him quirk an eyebrow as he was getting more and more frustrated.

You were trying to keep on this facade until a lightbulb appeared in Buddha’s mind. You were beginning to crawl away from him when he grabbed you by the leg and pulled you back, proceeding to tickle you mercilessly. 

You shrieked and wheezed, laughing your core out while Buddha teasingly leaned into your ear.

“Do you not love me anymore?!” Buddha cried out, biting your ear as you continued to laugh.

His figure was heavier so he practically had you in his grip, as you laughed and tried to fight his hands off.

“Buddha, no-!” you shrieked at his towering figure, “I was playing a small prank-! I love you!”

“If you love me then don’t dodge my kiss! You’re breaking this gentleman’s heart, you know?” he soon stopped and engulfed your breathless body, nuzzling against your hair in a loving way.

You two soon made up until you yelped when he spanked your ass.

He then carried you like a baby to an area that’s more private to have some sexy time together

Let’s just say you both gained more than enlightenment on that night

𝐐𝐈𝐍 𝐒𝐇𝐈 𝐇𝐔𝐀𝐍𝐆

This handsome king would just keep on asking for kisses, but you would continuously deny him

No one would deny the emperor of China but you took your chances to prank him since he always had a sweet spot for you

The first time you did it, he felt as if you bitch slapped him as he stared at you in shock, before he followed you everywhere, asking for kisses again and again

Qin Shi Huang was the greatest emperor of China, a title that was on par with his strength. He was confident, bold, and never backed down against an enemy or someone that threatened his country and people. 

He met you one night when he was ill with a cold. You were a healer from a small village but you were extremely talented and knowledgeable, so his advisors went to fetch you right away. When you arrived, the emperor was breathless when he saw your appearance, as you treated and tended him tenderly.

“Who are you? I’ve never seen you before.” were the first things he told you.

“I’m a healer.” you told him simply, telling him the village you were from.

After that night, Qin realised that you were intelligent, beautiful, compassionate and he declared proudly that you were his official doctor. He recovered quickly and soon, the emperor was absolutely in love and enamoured with you. 

As a husband, Qin was much more charismatic, playful, and teasing in a cute way, unlike his usual serious self when he was taking care of the country. He loved to kiss you, cherish you, and shower you with his attention and touches. Speaking of touches, this man absolutely cannot get his hands OFF you. He was obsessed with touching you, making sure that you were still here by his side since he had a terrible past. He didn’t want to lose you, holding you tight every night in his arms when you two slept, and making sure that the guards and bodyguards were keeping you safe when he was busy - though he tends to guard and protect you now. 

You always responded to his touches and affectionate gestures but since he was always a tease, you wanted to have some payback.

“LOVE!!!” Qin exclaimed, following you and trying to kiss you constantly, “come back!”

“I caught you!” he sang and you squealed as he embraced you and lifted you up happily.

His hands rested on your waist and his lips pursed, leaning forwards to kiss you once more, when you dodged again, leaving him more perplexed than ever. 

“Eh?” his eyebrows raised and he tried once more, but you dodged, “my queen, are you upset? Please don’t be… I just want to kiss and love you.”

He continues to pester and whine, placing butterfly kisses along your neck and arms until you give up and finally kiss him.

Since you denied this emperor, he was going to give you the spanking of your life in his bedroom 

And you gave him some treatments too- 😏

Additional stories:

✩ Infatuation (yandere!gods x reader)

✩ Little Darling (yandere!thor x reader)

#record of ragnarok #record of ragnarok smut #record of ragnarok x reader #shuumatsu no valkyrie #ror x reader #snv x reader #shuumatsu no valkyrie x reader #ror hades #ror fluff #ror buddha #ror thor #ror poseidon #ror qin shi huang #snv thor #snv hades #snv poseidon #snv qin shi huang #snv buddha #snv x you #record of ragnorak #ror smut #snv smut

[kurorama]

Drunkenly In Love

Bucky Barnes x Avenger!reader

IN WHICH you and Bucky ‘accidentally’ get married after a drunken game of truth or dare with the avengers.

WC: 5.4k

Warnings: Alcohol consumption, nausea, mentions of puke, drunken decisions, suggestive, angst?.

A/N: In this Bucky and Steve are able to get at least a bit drunk with Asgardian liquor.

Your throat burnt as the alcohol downed its way into your system, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to put the bottle down. None of you could in fact, and it started to look less like the avengers and more like a squad of alcoholics. Nevertheless, you all deserved a night of getting completely shitfaced after saving the world once again, and so this was what you all were doing. 

It was relaxing to see the people that usually stayed sober to care for you all, finally give in to the sheer pleasure of the buzz. What was even funnier, was seeing your teammates with ‘high tolerances’ like Bucky and Steve succumb to the venomous call of Thor’s Adgardian liquor. It wasn’t enought you get them as fucked up as the rest of you, considering that the serum made them filter alcohol way faster than it should. However the mere strength of it gave them a good couple of minutes of intoxication, and with teammates like you and Tony around, a couple of minutes were definitely enough to stir some trouble.

Trouble, the nickname that had been given to you by the team. The notorious partner in crime of none other than Iron Man and The Falcon themselves. You loved stirring trouble and pulling harmless pranks on your teammates, whether it’d be adding food colouring to Steve’s shampoo, which definitely left him a little confused and a little pink for the rest of the week. Or like that one time you and Tony had placed glitter bombs around the tower. Except that one wasn’t as funny as you had originally planned, because having the former Black Widow chasing after you was not the definition of fun.

Past your playful exterior, you were always a teammate that your friends relied on. The rest of the avengers loved you like you were their own sibling, and you’d found sisterhood in the presence of Wanda and Nat. They saw past your flaws and the lack of control that you had with your own powers when you first joined the team, and instead helped you with and through those obstacles like a real family should. 

It took you a while to break through Bucky’s tough exterior, but you didn’t expect any less from the Ex Hydra soldier that was constantly haunted by the memories of what he’d done. Even if none of it was his fault, as you’d remind him constantly, you knew that it was always hard for him to accept when every time he’d close his eyes he was flashed with the images of his hands covered in blood, nobody else’s but his. 

Your outgoing personality also made it very hard to connect with him, because he felt that someone with so much potential of making other friends than ones as messed up in the head as him should go on and do so, but you had never given up. And you were glad that you hadn’t, because over the years, you’d grown fond of seeing that warm smile lift upon his lips at the very rare occasions. 

-

Everything had started out as a shitty game of truth or dare, truly. After Bruce had chosen truth once too many times and Thor kept on complaining that his dares were too ‘serene’, your true mastermind had truly come to show. 

“Come closer dude, we literally can’t see you,” you called out to Thor, throwing an arm over his shoulders to bring him closer to you as you both sat on the luxurious yet oddly long sofa in the Stark Tower. Your front camera was on, an out-of-frame picture of yours and Thor’s forehead being snapped as your hand trembled too much, and the beefy blond was far too impatient for you to retake. 

You’d posted a story on the Avengers instagram account with the encouragement of your peers, and of course the worrying of a typsy Steve. It was probably the worst idea that you could have come up with, because after solely a couple minutes of posting a ‘send us dares’ story, your phones began to blow with notifications. 

It took you all a solid minute to reassemble everyone together to start reading the messages, and you ignored the far too crude ones as you moved to the funny ones. Cue the loud ringing of Sam and Thor’s laughter combined and minutes later, you’d all decided on a couple of ones for the night. 

I’d started off with things such as vision, who he was solely participating in because everyone was borderline pressuring him 

It’d started off with things such as a very sober vision, who was solely participating because everyone was borderline pressuring him due to his lack of ability when it came to being influenced by alcohol, give the AI a break. He had been dared to recreate the spaghetti scene from ‘Lady and The Tramp’ with Clint. Needless to say that they both broke apart the spaghetti centimetres apart, unable to stop the roaring of laughter from raising up their throats. 

Next thing you know is that Wanda was wrapped in toilet paper like a damned mummy, and Tony revealed his inner Magic Mike. But the man used to be a legitimate whore, so it was nothing surprising really. You all had realised somewhere along the night that you’d been acting a little too much like children considering your ages, and instead of switching back to your professional selves, you decided to empty another bottle or two for the night. 

What you hadn’t expected for the night however, was the bold and surprising request of ‘Marry the person to your left’ that was now sitting in your inbox. It sounded so stupidly thought of that you could practically tell that it was coming from a kid, but something inside of you couldn’t care less about the future repercussions of going further on with the dare. 

In fact, you felt your drunken heart accelerating its pace when you were met with the sight of the one and only Bucky Barnes sitting to your left. It did not help that you had been attracted to the man for what seemed like 2 years now, yet you hardly acted on those feelings. It was easier to pretend like your admiration towards the super soldier was nonexistent rather than face his rejection. The rejection that you thought he���d give you if you ever confessed, but if only you knew. 

If only you knew how many nights he’d been spending up rethinking the amount of interactions he could’ve sparked with you if he hadn’t been so hesitant. If only you knew how much Bucky yearned to confront his own self about his self deprecating issues, but deep down he knew that he was right. He knew that a person as charismatic and chaotic as you did not deserve to be chained to a person as grumpy and boring as him. 

You considered shying away when the whole team turned to you asking what your dare was, but it’d be a direct giveaway of your feelings towards the brunette once they’d hear what your dare was. Instead you’d feigned the shock that you had initially felt before the warmness of your imagination seeped in, the thoughts of you being married to Bucky making your brain short circuit. 

“Woahhh and would you look at that,” the lack of surprise in your voice was masked by the slur of your words because of how much you’d drank, and you were glad that everybody else had ingurgitated just as much as you because their faces showed no sign of suspicion as they waited for you to turn your phone around. The first person that you had shown it to was whoever was to your right, and that just happened to be Sam and Scott. 

The duo squealed like little girls at the sight of the dare, but the Falcon’s eyes widened comically as he eyed who exactly was at your left. He’d snatched your phone instantly to show the others, and no matter how much you protested for him to hand it back to you, Sam was like an annoying big brother to you. There was no way you’d be getting it back unless you forcedly found a way to. 

The three other girls in the tower had their hands over their mouths as they read the exact words that this random person had sent you, and Wanda looked more excited than you were. You’d beg her to exchange dares with her if it wasn’t for the bulky super soldier’s family name being on the line, and you had no issue with becoming Mrs.Barnes.

Steve and Bucky on their sides sat there confused as everyone kept on basking Bucky some shocked and amazed looks, which was starting to irritate him greatly because everybody was taking so much time with the phone and nobody was even voicing out what the damned dare was. His vexation had lasted for minutes until the phone had been personally placed in his hands by no other than Sam himself. 

Bucky placed the phone between himself and Steve as their quick eyes skimmed over the text. His only physical reaction to the words was the raise of his eyebrows, but fuck was his heart stammering against his rib cage at a faster pace than the speed at which Steve ran his morning rounds. His reaction had you internally pausing all other thoughts as you imagined that he was slightly disgusted at the idea. 

You knew that he had a dream of domesticity back in the 40’s, but you knew that no man would like to be forced into a marriage with a woman that they didn’t want to marry. And although Bucky admired you in much more than a platonic way, that you didn’t know of yet, he hadn’t necessarily imagined himself being married to you. He was still figuring out how to ask you out without pussing out at the last minute, which had happened to him about 5 times now. Needless to say that Sam had made fun of him all five times. 

He was internally turmoiled, and if not for the alcohol running thick in his system, he’d say no. He’d refuse and say that you deserved better than him and some shitty ceremony based on some even shittier dare. But he couldn’t physically say it now, not when his better judgement was affected and the alcohol let the side that was fond of you control him. 

You were about to open your mouth to tell him that it was okay, that he could decline or worse, you could find another partner. Even if you didn’t want to marry anyone else than him, even less for a game. Yet he cut you off with a deep laugh that startled everyone in the room, it was not sardonic but rather held an amusing tone to it. 

Bucky shook his head as he stood up to look at you, grasping your hands in his bigger ones like some romance movie sap. The Cheshire grin on his face made you want to melt into putty in his embrace, and his stupidly plain words had you doubling back. 

“So…what time’s the wedding?” 

-

“Hurry up, you’re gonna be late to your own wedding!” the teasing sound of Wanda’s voice called out to you, accent thick in her tone. The guys had already rushed your soon-to-be groom into Tony’s room to get him ready, much to the billionaire’s dismay. You couldn’t help but laugh your entire way towards the room, you face up towards the ceiling as you giggled like a mad woman.

Wanda dragged you by the arm and into Nat’s room, who was nose deep inside her wardrobe in search of an appropriate dress for your ‘wedding’. You’d be searching through Pepper's closet given that she had a wider selection, but you couldn’t go there given that the boys were dressing Bucky up in Tony and Pepper’s shared room. 

“What about this one? Or- No, this one!” you snapped your head towards the sound of Wanda’s voice, only to catch her with two dresses in hands. Except these two dresses had little to nothing to do with a wedding, yet alone being the bride to that wedding, but this was Nat’s wardrobe after all. The black Maxi dress in her hands was the definition of the former Black Widow’s wardrobe, tight, dark and sexy if anything. 

You didn’t have much say in the decision because soon enough the two girls were on you, shoving your limbs and whatnot through the holes of the dress to drape it over you. You couldn’t lie when you said that it did fit you well, the stretchy fabric of the dress squeezing and moulding into your body in every way that it should. The dress finished by your ankles, accompanied by spaghetti straps and a pair of pretty heels that had been shoved in your hands for you to slip on. 

Given that the dress did in fact go braless, you did have a little worry about how the chilly air outside would mix with that, but you were far too gone to even care. With some final touches and a brush of makeup, you were finally ready to meet your to-be husband. 

As a kid you’d always imagine your wedding scene to be much more emotional than this. You’d imagine yourself in some stupid movie scene where you’d cry at the first sight of your husband, but now the only tears you were holding back were the ones you were getting from laughing so much. Pepper had to slap you on the back to straighten up after you’d crumpled down from laughter, and you had yet to even meet up with Bucky. 

You could hear the loud and deep voices of the other men past the long hallway that you were currently walking in, and you mentally cursed Tony for being so rich and having such a big Tower because hell were your feet already hurting in those heels.

“Here comes the bride!” The sudden entrance of Clint’s excited voice made your eyes snap upwards, and you instantly realised that you had finally left the never ending hallway. All eyes were on you, but instead of judging your odd wedding outfit, you were relieved to hear their cheers. You couldn’t even tell why you’d gotten anxious about your team being unaccepting of your fit when that odd dare was the genesis of this whole moment. 

Bucky stood out in his black suit amongst the other ‘underdressed’ avengers, and when your eyes met with the familiar blue ones amongst all the others, suddenly all you could focus on was him. Not on your friends around you half heartedly arguing about whether you guys looked like the Addams couple or Lydia Deetz and Beetlejuice because of your attire. In the most adoring way possible, of course. 

Your gaze never left his accept when his eyes cast down to scan your outfit, and you could’ve sworn that there was even more adoration swirling in his baby blue iris when they went back up to meet with yours again. This was at last a little bit how you had expected your wedding to go as when you were a kid, all until…

The loud laughter erupting out of your throats rebounded against the tower’s walls, making you both sound way louder than you actually were. The rest of your friends didn’t even bother with the both of you, just talking over your laughter as you doubled over at how stupid this whole situation was. Yet again you couldn’t take anything seriously when you were sober, now imagine yourself when a drop of alcohol entered your system. 

The sound of Bucky’s laughter was something that you didn’t know you needed today, but fuck did it sound like heaven. You wanted him to keep on laughing like this forever, for that wide smile on his face to stay instead of that usual scowl he wore on his face. You wanted Bucky to continue being so happy and carefree like this, you wanted to keep on making Bucky so happy like this. 

Nevertheless your little moment was shortly interrupted by Wanda yet again grasping onto your arm, this time with a little more pressure as Happy’s impatient honking could be heard all the way from up here in the Tower. As you left, Bucky couldn’t help but keep his eyes glued to your retreating form. Before Steve came to shake his shoulders playfully from the back, muttering something that you couldn’t hear or even care about from where you were, but it didn’t fail to make heat creep up Bucky’s neck. 

-

The ride in Stark’s limousine was just as fun as the rest of the night itself, except that now they were popping a bottle of champagne to honorate your soon to be ‘wedding’. Honestly you had up to zero idea as to how all of your stomachs could support so much liquids in one night, but you were 100% sure that Happy had snuck in sparkling juice inside the limousine fridge because he was starting to get a little worried. The sight of Scott literally gagging while trying to keep everything down his throat nearly made you puke everything that you’d drank throughout the night, but you forced your glance away from the man to avoid any accidents. 

The poor bruce looked drunkenly traumatised as Tony conducted a little karaoke at the back of his limousine, which was the least surprising for the billionaire. You got a good laugh once more out of the ride, which was heading towards somewhere for you both to sign the register and finally make you Mrs.Barnes. Oh and how many times had you dreamt of this moment before, yet it didn’t happen like this in your fantasy.

The car finally stopping signed a peace treaty for the poor nauseous scott, and he could finally breathe again without feeling like his stomach was flipping inside out. You all could barely even make it out of the car without stumbling your ways out. Fuck and how did you all even manage to get this fucked up? You couldn’t even remember the last time you’d gotten so drunk that you could barely even stand up straight, but it was most probably during your college years.

Being part of the troupe that saves the world from the devil's grip was not an easy job. There'd be days where you’d be gone for weeks on nothing else but a simple mission, and you couldn’t even guarantee that you’d even return as a whole from the other ones. So while you could, you’d enjoy your holidays and be free, fuck if it meant playing some stupidly childish game of drunken truth or dare. 

All eyes were of you guys from the moment you’d stepped out of the limousine and into the courthouse. Of course Tony hadn’t reserved a normal courtroom in some random courthouse, no instead he’d reserved you the most pristine and elegant one you’d ever seen. The marble stairs and luxurious railings left you speechless, but yet you couldn’t expect little if it was coming from one and only Iron Man. 

A civil ceremony wasn’t what the little you had envisioned for her big day, but her dreams were being forgotten today because you were still young and you could always have a traditional wedding ceremony afterwards if this one didn’t satisfy you anyways. 

You received a bunch of odd looks from whoever was working at the courthouse as you made way into the room. Either from the fact that you were dressed the furthest away from what a bride usually looks like, or from the amount of noise that your team was making. The officiant clearly looked like he wanted to tell you to rethink this, perhaps when you were sober and stable enough to actually think. Though Tony had paid him a stack of cash high enough for him to keep quiet, but his eyes were speaking for himself. 

“Look at my children, they’re growing up so fast!” Same wiped a fake tear on his face as he tried to conceal his laughter as sobs. Scott besides him was wiping tears too, though his didn’t quite seem fake…

Like any wedding ceremony, you’d all taken some corny pictures that you could laugh at while sitting by a campfire in a couple of years. You’d decided that the bride would take pictures with the groomsmen and the groom would take pictures with the bridesmaids, because this was no ordinary wedding, so you might as well make it laugh worthy. One of your matching pictures had you standing perched on both of Steve’s and Scott’s shoulders as they both held onto your ankles in case you happened to slip back. The rest of the boys you considered family posed in the most boyish yet stupidly cute pose as the flash blinded the whole of you. 

In your husband’s photos, Bucky was being suspended up in the air as some red aura kind of magic enveloped him. Queue an annoyed looking Pepper and Natasha standing besides Wanda as she lifted the man up in the air, their arms crossed across their chests as they gave Bucky an unimpressed look. The annoyance was all pretend, considering that after the camera’s click went off, they all rekindled their cheerful selves. 

“You guys need to end the night with a kiss, there’s no bride or groom going back home right now before you guys smooch!” Wanda slurred, her cheeks pink from the heat of the alcohol. Vision had to keep an arm around her waist at all times in case she fell over, and the AI sighed at everyone’s stupidity. At this point you were sure that everyone in the courtroom other than you guys was starting to get irritated with the noise so you decided to cut this short and just sign the damn papers already.

Except that now everyone was pressing on to what Wanda had said, and your nerves were running thick. You wanted to with no doubt, kiss the extremely handsome super soldier that you were somewhat about to marry, but you feared that you’d be going too far. Sure this whole thing was a whole joke, so what if he’d agree for the sake of the joke as well? You could always dream and delude yourself about the fact that he’d actually accepted the dare because he liked you just like you did him but you’d never know until you asked. 

Instead, you stayed quiet and tried to ignore the high pitched yelling coming from your teammates as the officiant passed you the pen. Your hand shook as you stared at the paper before you, and for a second you had to remind yourself that none of this was real. And so finally, you bent over to sign the papers that laid on a strangely low table.

Natasha’s teasing wolf whistle made your nerves dissipate and a goofy smile crawl up your face as she called you out for your position, or rather the way that your dress was tightening further with the position. Your hands were swift as you worked on the signature, little to no care for the lines of text that you were supposed to consider before officially tying yourself to the man that would also sign the same paper. 

You watched with a grin as Bucky approached the table to do the same, teasingly getting into the same position as you previously were to hear the loud screeching cheers of your teammates. You watched as he signed the paper off with the flick of his wrist, a hidden elegance in the way he moved being a surprise turn on for you. 

Bucky had not even had time to barely stand back up straight again before you had both started getting bombarded with a ‘kiss to seal the deal’ request from your friends, and you did agree that it’d only make sense to kiss your other half on your wedding day. You didn’t want to make it seem like you were all too eager to smooch the former Winter Soldier, although on the inside you were shaking with anticipation. 

His touch took you off guard as you felt time stop as his large palm slotted itself in the crevice of your back, the warmth of his hand seeping through the dress. You felt as he pulled you closer to him with that hand, but you couldn’t look elsewhere than his eyes. You got the moto to finally close your eyes instead of staring at him like some creep as you felt his other palm closing on your cheek. Your palms came to rest on his chest as he dipped you like in those cheesy rom coms from the 40’s, and you guessed that was his inspiration. 

The kiss was much needed, you felt like it’d cut through some of the tension that you’d both built throughout the past months. Bucky’s nose flashed against yours as he kissed you with need, near desperation. His lips slotted over yours perfectly, the slight dip of his head making you go feral as he reached deeper like he was trying to devour you whole. 

Asif you and your friends couldn’t get any louder, their yelling had yet ceased to stop. Truly a sight for the people who knew the Avengers as the universe’s saviour. The end of the night had left a usually happy and unusually smiling Bucky, and not to forget, the whole group of tipsy Avengers in the back. 

The initial energy that you all had at the start of the day had eventually worn out by the time you were making your way back to the car. It didn’t mean that the ride back was silent though, you’d all participated in a round of karaoke before sitting down and finally for the first time this entire night, calmly talking like normal people. 

-

Waking up with a pounding headache and no water in sight wasn’t necessarily the best way to wake up, but that’s how Bucky’s morning was going anyway. The plush mattress felt uncomfortable to him, and Bucky wondered what he was even doing on a bed considering he’d gotten used to sleeping on the floor ever since his Soldat days. His eyes held a grogginess that irritated him, in fact everything from the scratchy material of the cotton sheets to his headache was annoying him, and he could blame nothing else but the trace of alcohol that he knew he’d drunk yesterday night. 

It was obvious that he was under the influence yesterday and had gotten back home just as faded, because he could feel the fabric of a suit on his body as his hands roamed freely. His pants were still fastened on with the tight belt, which he’d removed with a content sigh. Bucky’s fingers rubbed at his eyes until he got most of the sleepiness out of them, but his muscles suddenly froze as the sound of shuffling beside him. 

His heart stopped for a second, before resuming its pounding just 3x the original speed. He couldn’t remember much of yesterday, and surely not that he’d brought someone back home with him. He was relieved at the memory of his suit still very much on him, the tight belt telling him that it hadn’t been removed ever since he’d put it on him. He’d love to beat himself at the thought of having to pick up his courage to turn around and meet whoever was in his bed, given that a super soldier like him had gone through scarier scenarios.

His breath caught stuck in his throat as he turned around to be met with the sight of…you? It felt like the planet earth had stopped orbiting for a second as he felt ten times more dizzy than he’d felt at his wake. His confusion ran thick as he watched you comfortably snoozing off in his bed. His bed? Bucky thought about it again, there was no way that he wasn’t currently in the Stark Tower, and he could tell that the room looked nothing like his despite the little lighting that he had to observe his surroundings. 

He was in your room, on your bed. How he’d arrive here was a mystery, but that was something to decipher later on. Bucky’s eyes gazed over your sleeping form, from the way your cheeks were adorably squished against your pillow with your hands tucked under them. His eyes trailed down towards your outfit, and he wanted to yell at himself for the way that he ogled a little too long at the sight of the thin, tight fabric resting against your chest. The dress was all out of place because of how much you’d move in your sleep, it looked like it would completely expose your breast if you moved just a little more. 

Bucky felt much guilt coursing through his veins as he continued to eye you like some crude teenage boy, yet he couldn’t get himself to stop. He could’ve sworn that he had to hold himself back from drooling at the sight of your long dress all scrunched up around your hips, exposing a bit of your legs to him. The sheer black fabric left much to the imagination as it wrapped perfectly around your thighs, that were perfectly plumped out for him in the fetal position that you slept in. 

He had to physically run a hand down his face to distract the flow of blood reaching the unconventional spot right now, and instead tried to focus on finding out how he’d end up here. Sure he had no problems with sharing a bed with you, matter of fact he’d dreamt of it for months now ever since he’d developed a ‘crush’ on you as Steve would annoy him with. Yet, he felt that it was wrong as he could clearly smell the pungent smell of liquor on the both of you. 

He grunted as he sat up, cracking his back like the old man that he was. Bucky checked up on you once more to find you peacefully sleeping the morning away, probably due to the amount that you drank yesterday, yet he didn’t care because it looked like you were having the best sleep of your life. As he fumbled with something along your bedside table, Bucky’s hand accidently came to crumble the side of a piece of paper.

Cursing to himself, he grabbed the sheet to try and smooth it out before you killed him for messing with your shit. Though he cared little for what that paper was, the words in bold ‘Marriage’ that he’d caught in the corner of his eye had surprised him, so he allowed himself to peek a little into your private life. A sudden new fear coursed through his body as he looked back at you for another second. Were you married and living a double life? Fuck, now he felt even more shitty as he laid on a bed with you, what would your husband think of all of this? Was your husband a shitty guy? Was that why you’d never mentioned him? 

All sorts of questions ran through his head, but not once had he berated or blamed you in his head. He knew that you were nothing more than loyal, so it confused him even more as to how wedding papers were just casually laying there on the table. However, as he opened the sheet of paper to pry into your life, his heart stopped at the clear handwriting that could belong to nobody else than him. His signature and name needed no explanation or proof, they were all clearly written by him. 

Bucky’s heart picked up the pace once more, only this time he felt like he was going to have a panic attack like he did after reliving his horrors through nightmares. He could barely remember shit of what had happened last night, and next thing he knows, he’s waking up next to the woman he fancies and apparently they’re married? 

He fumbled with the paper in a stressed out attempt at scampering, he needed answers, and if nobody had them then he surely knew that the multiple cameras around the Tower had them. He needed to talk to Steve about this mess, and as he prepared to stand up, he froze at the sound of your yawn. He laid there unmoving for a solid minute, wishing that you’d solely changed positions and went back to sleep. After a whole minute of silence, Bucky’s shoulders dropped in relief, all until-

“Bucky…?”

-

let’s pretend like the avengers are all united, happy and alive lmao:)

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x avenger!reader #bucky x avenger!reader #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes fluff #avenger!reader #avengers x reader #husband!bucky barnes #husband!bucky #bucky barnes angst

[captainsolocide]

kinda wish jane foster had a playable story instead of just jumping in with playing her

#mavg #jane foster #the mighty thor #she doesnt even have harm training #ig cause her gameplay is so similar to thor's but #just a few cut scenes would also be nice #but i still love her and looking forward to seeing more of her in future dlcs #and they added new soundbites so i can forgive them #prank war lore and shuri's anti-tony and t'challa agenda continues #cool new character!

[vbecker10]

*Steve, Bucky, Thor, Natasha and Tony are eating at the island in the common kitchen

Y/N: Oh... I think I'm in trouble this time

*runs into the kitchen from the hallway & hides in the pantry

*Loki walks angrily into the kitchen

Loki: Where's Y/N?

Steve, Natasha, Tony, Thor and Bucky each point in a different direction

Loki: you are all useless, storms off

Y/n comes out from the pantry

Tony: Do we even want to know?

Y/N: apparently Loki only likes pranks when he's the one doing them

#tom hiddleston #hiddlestoners #loki #tom hiddleston characters #loki laufeyson #twhiddleston #hiddlesarmy #loki x reader #loki odinson #hiddlesverse

[storiesforallfandoms]

kneel ~ loki laufeyson;mcu

word count: 3541

request?: no

description: after finally being fed up with loki’s pranks, she finds out something about her friend’s little brother, something that intrigues her greatly

pairing: loki laufeyson x female!reader

warnings: swearing, smut (masturbation, oral - f receiving, unprotected p in v)

masterlist (one, two, three)

I had known Thor since we were both kids, and that meant I had known Loki just as long. Loki was always Thor’s annoying little brother who lived up to his “God of Mischief” title a little too much. He had always loved to pull pranks on Thor and his friends, and he was the only one who enjoyed any of those pranks.

They started when we were kids - small, innocent pranks that were annoying, but not terrible. It was when they continued into our teenage and young adult years that they became a problem.

It was no use talking to Thor about it. He loved his little brother too much, even if he didn’t like the pranks either. He’d always just say, “He is the God of Mischief. It is just within his nature.”

I was pushed to the edge one day when I returned to my quarters to find a surprise waiting for me in my bed. Everyone knew of my fear of snakes. This information had unfortunately reached Loki as well. I had been waiting for him to use that information against me, but eventually I managed to forget he even knew. Until I got back to my quarters, kicked off my boots, and pulled back the covers to flop onto my bed, only to find it was full of snakes.

I shrieked and fell flat onto my ass. My heart was pounding as one of the snakes stretched its body out to put its face in mine. My fear was quickly replaced by anger as I realized exactly who put them there. I got to my feet and stormed out the door.

Loki was in the palace garden by himself. He was lucky I didn’t have any of my weapons, even though I could do just as much damage without them. I stormed up to him and, when he turned to face me, I swung. My fist connected with his cheek, knocking him to the ground. He had the audacity to look up at me in shock as he cupped his cheek.

“I have had enough of your bullshit, Loki!” I sneered. “Your tricks are going too far. Now you will pay!”

He tried to stutter something out, but I cut him off with a kick to the gut. I heard him wheeze as he fell onto his back, clutching his stomach. I knew I’d be in huge trouble if anyone were to catch us. Whether I was Thor’s friend or not didn’t matter when I was beating the shit out of the Asgardian prince. But I was far from caring at that point.

I drew back my leg and kicked him again, sending him rolling across the ground again. He quickly scrambled to his knees, holding his hands up to stop my assaults.

“I’m sorry!” he said. “I’m sorry. The snakes were too far, you’re right.”

“Why should I accept your apology?” I asked. “Nothing has ever stopped you before. Why should I believe you won’t put more snakes in my quarters once I’ve forgotten about this?”

“Please, I promise you I will never pull any pranks on you ever again. I have learned my lesson. You have my word on that.”

His word often meant nothing. He was the trickster god after all. I wouldn’t trust his word as far as I could throw him.

But there was something about the way he looked right now; on his knees, looking up at me with his big, blue eyes, his chest rising and falling with every panted breath as he tried to recover from my attack. His words were lost as I just looked at him. The thoughts that started to fill my mind were not ones I would’ve ever thought I could have about Loki.

When I realized what I was thinking, I quickly snapped out of my trance wans said, “I believe you” before turning to rush back to my quarters.

I closed my door and leaned back against it. I had completely forgotten about the creatures Loki had left in my bed, but now they were gone. I guess he had used his magic to get rid of them sometime between my attack and hasty departure. I tried to channel that anger back as I was reminded of what sent me to Loki to begin with, but my mind was now clouded with the image of Loki on his knees.

I decided to get a quick, cold shower to try and cool myself down, but it only made things worse. As the cold water cascaded over my body, I found myself envisioning that I wasn’t alone. As my hands moved over my body, I found myself imagining they were Loki’s hands. Soapy hands running over my arms, my shoulders, cupping my breasts. I let out a moan as I squeezed them, imagining Loki stood behind me, his lips on my neck as his hands toyed with me.

I gasped as I came to my sense. What is wrong with me?!

The minute the water shut off, my body felt hot to the touch again. The thought alone of having to put clothes back on made me feel claustrophobic, so I decided just to slip under the covers. my mind was still playing images I desperately wished would stop. Every time I closed my eyes, all I saw was Loki. It’s not like I hadn’t noticed Loki like that before. When the two of us were going through puberty and starting to “notice” the opposite sex more, I saw how handsome he had become. But even then I never thought of him like this.

There was a dull ache between my legs that was starting to become too much to ignore. Maybe...maybe I just take care of it and these thoughts will finally go away.

I let one hand move down my body again, skimming over my breasts and stomach until I reached the heat between my legs. I gasped as I applied light pressure to my clit. I closed my eyes and allowed myself to picture Loki. I imagined him on his knees again, his blue eyes watching me as I stand over him. I pictured him pulling me closer and his lips teasing the host skin of my lower stomach. I whimpered as I applied more pressure to the circles I was rubbing on my clit. In my imagination, Loki was lifting my leg over his shoulder to get better access to my dripping pussy.

Before I could stop myself, Loki’s name slipped from my lips followed by a string of moans. Despite the fact that my brain was too lust clouded to really think about it, I knew I had no reason to stop myself from saying his name while I pleasured myself. The walls were essentially soundproof, so no one was going to hear who I was fantasizing about.

Or so I thought anyways.

Because as I came closer and closer to the edge, I heard a noise in my room. When I opened my eyes, I saw that I was not alone.

Loki was stood there, looking at me with wide eyes and pink tinted cheeks.

I screamed and sat up. The blanket fell to my lap, so I collected it again and used it to cover my bare body.

“What the fuck are you doing here?!” I snapped. “How did you get in?!”

“I-I came in while you were in the shower,” he responded. “I...I was trying to scare you as payback for what happened in the garden, but when you came out naked and didn’t get dressed...”

He trailed off, his face growing redder by the second. I wondered at first how much he had seen, but if he was saying he had been here since I was in the shower, that meant he had seen everything. He had seen me naked, seen me touching myself, heard me moaning his name.

It was my turn for my face to burn with embarrassment. I turned away quickly so he couldn’t see my expression.

“Do you often think of me when you’re in here at night getting yourself off?”

I tried to scowl at him for even asking such a stupid question, but when my eyes met his I saw that he was no longer embarrassed. Instead, there seemed to be a hint of mischief in those blue eyes. And not the kind where he was about to cause some sort of annoying trouble. No, this was lust.

“No,” I told him. “I’ve never thought of you like this. It’s just...for some reason...after seeing you on yours knees in the garden...”

He chuckled. “Oh, you want to see me on my knees then, is that it?”

I could feel the heat growing between my legs again. Loki approached me, pausing a moment to see if I was going to tell him to leave. I knew I should’ve, but I really did not want to. I was curious to see where he was going with this, and if it meant he was going to give me the release I dearly needed...well, there was no harm in that, was there?

When I didn’t give any indication that I wanted him to leave, he extended a hand to me. I took it and he gently pulled me from my bed so I was standing in front of him. He was always taller than me, but I never truly noticed it until this moment, looking up at him and waiting for him to make some sort of move. He held eye contact with me as he slowly lowered himself to his knees in front of me.

“What was it I was doing in your fantasy?” he asked.

“Y-You were using your m-mouth on me,” I stuttered out.

“Like this?” he asked before leaning forward to press a kiss to my stomach - just like in my fantasy.

“Y-Yes,” I said. “But also...lower.”

“How much lower?”

“I think you know.”

He chuckled again. “I do, but I want to hear you say it.”

“You were kissing me on my pussy before you so rudely interrupted my fantasy.”

I gasped as he lightly bit at the soft skin on my stomach. “So naughty, even when you have me on my knees wanting to give you exactly what you were thinking about. Although, I suppose I did so rudely interrupt you while you were trying to get yourself off. I should try to make that up to you.”

He took my leg and lifted it over his shoulder. I reached behind me and used the nearest object - my nightstand - to steady myself as Loki immediately dove his tongue into my folds. I gasped, which turned into a moan. It felt even better than I ever could’ve imagined. Actually, I don’t think anything I could’ve imagined would ever live up to this. I had never had anyone go down on me, although I had done the same to plenty of my partners in the past. The feeling made me so lightheaded so quickly that I felt like I was floating.

While keeping one hand on my nightstand (because I was sure if I stopped holding it I would’ve toppled over), I ran my other through Loki’s long hair. Growing up, I had often teased him about wanting to keep his hair long because I told him it would just get in the way during battle. But now, I was glad he had never taken any of my words to heart. His long, black locks were the perfect thing to grab hold of and use to direct him as he devoured me. At one point, as his tongue ran from the tip of my clit all the way down to my pussy, I involuntarily pulled on his hair a little harder than I meant to. His response was to moan, not taking his mouth from me, sending a shiver all throughout my body.

He was watching me. Never once did his eyes leave me as he made me come undone just with his tongue. I tried to keep eye contact, but my eyes kept closing or my head would lull back in pleasure. I wanted this to last as long as possible, but I found myself nearing the edge quickly. I tried to pull Loki away, but he attached himself to me.

“Wait,” I breathed. “I-I’m gonna...”

“Cum in my mouth,” he told me before placing his mouth around my clit again and running his tongue over it.

It was enough to finally push me over the edge. I cried out in pleasure as I felt his tongue run down to my pussy to collect the juices running from it. My legs began to tremble and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to stand up for much longer. As if reading my mind, Loki’s hands raised up to hold onto my hips as he had a few last laps. When he finally managed to pull himself from me, I could see that his lips were glistening from me. It was enough to almost turn me on again.

He got to his feet again and kissed me. I could taste myself on his lips. He slowly backed me up until I was falling back onto my bed. He followed me down, crawling on top of me so that his legs were straddling my hips. His mouth was on mine again, still hungry as if he hadn’t just eaten me like a man who hadn’t had food in years.

I reached between us to try and undo his pants, but he quickly moved his hand to capture my wrist. I jumped at the sudden contact.

“Do you not want to go further?” I asked. “I’ll respect your wishes if not, but you’re giving me very mixed signals if that’s the case.”

He shook his head. “No, I want to go further. You have no idea how badly I need to be inside of you right now. It’s just...”

He didn’t have to finish his sentence for me to understand what he meant.

“There’s a lady in town who gives out contraceptives to the maidens in town,” I told him. “She said that on Midgard they call it ‘birth control’, but other realms are starting to take note of it to try and control their populations.”

“So...if we were to go through with this, there’s no risk of us producing an offspring?”

For some reason, the way he phrased it made me giggle as I shook my head. “No. There will be no little Lokis running around the castle.”

In a flash, his lips were on mine again. He didn’t stop me when I reached between us this time. I unbuttoned his pants and tried to pull them down without breaking the kiss. Unfortunately, it was not as easy as I would have wanted it to be and we eventually had to break away so Loki could undress himself. I watched, impatiently, as he pulled his shirt over his head first, then agonizingly slowly removed his pants and boxers. I couldn’t help but stare as his cock sprang free from their confinements. I had never really thought about the size of Loki’s dick, but I was pleasantly surprised to see what he was packing.

He climbed over me again, kissing me deeply as he lined himself up with entrance. I was still wet enough from my first orgasm that he was able to run the head of his dick through my folds and collect enough wetness that he could push himself into me with ease. He filled me slowly, letting me adjust to every inch of his length until he was buried to the hilt inside of me. I felt so full that I almost never wanted him to pull out of me.

“Are you okay?” he asked. “If anything hurts I’ll stop.”

“You are hardly the first lover I’ve had, Loki,” I told him. “I’ve done this before, you aren’t going to hurt me.”

He grinned down at me. “My, my, Thor’s virtuous best friend allowing herself to be defiled?”

“I’m hardly virtuous. Even Thor knows that. He just never wants to heard of my escapades.”

“I don’t think I want to hear of them either.” Before I could respond, he pulled out until it was just the head of his dick inside of me, before thrusting all the way in again. The words fizzled in my throat and became moans instead. “I don’t want to think of anyone else defiling you. Not in the past, and not in the future. If we are crossing this boundary tonight, then I want you to be mine. No other person in all of Asgard or any other realm can have you, do you understand?”

I nodded.

“I want to hear you say it.”

“Gods, Loki, I’m yours! I promise, I will not let anyone else have me. I’m yours and yours alone, I swear.”

I could feel his smirk against my neck as he began to kiss me. “Say it one more time. I like hearing it.”

“I’m yours, Loki. All of me is yours.”

With every thrust inwards he was hitting spots that I didn’t even know could exist within me. He kissed wherever his lips could reach, and what they couldn’t reach he touched with his hands instead. He continued to whisper sweet nothings into my ear as he fucked me like it was his life’s purpose. I wasn’t sure if he actually meant that he wanted me to be his or if it was just the lust of the moment taking over, but I was starting to hope he really meant it. I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else after this. He was ruining me with every thrust, every caress, every kiss.

“Fuck,” he breathed. “I’m getting close.”

“Please cum in me,” I said. If I was in my right mind I might’ve been embarrassed to beg, but there was one thing I wanted right now and I wasn’t afraid to voice that.

“Is that what you want, pet?” he asked. “Do you want me to fill you up? To really claim you as mine?”

I nodded quickly, unable to form any other words. I wrapped my legs around his waist, which caused him to chuckle. “Alright, I’ll give you exactly what you want then.”

I could feel him twitching inside of me, and within a matter of seconds he was spilling into me. He buried his head into my shoulder, his groans muffled against my skin. My hands were gripping at his back so hard that I was sure there were going to be imprints of my nails left in his skin. I looked up at the ceiling of my quarters, but all I could see were stars.

We laid together for what felt like hours. I didn’t want this to end, but I feared that once Loki had come down from his high that he would regret everything he had said. I knew I probably was supposed to feel the same way, he was Thor’s little brother after all. I shouldn’t think of him as a partner or a lover. And yet, I was dreading the moment he pulled out of me and looked at me with regret. Or worse yet, that he would leave without even so much as a glance in my direction and forget this ever happened.

To my surprise, when Loki finally did pull himself from me, he held me with one arm and moved the blankets back so we could both slip under them. He pulled me to him, resting my head on his chest, and reached over to turn off the light on my nightstand.

“You’re staying, then?” I asked. It came out soft and hopeful.

“Did you want me to leave?” he asked.

“No,” I said quickly.

“Then I’ll stay.”

“You don’t...regret what just happened?”

“Do you?”

“Do you always have to answer a question with a question?”

His chest vibrated beneath my cheek as he laughed. “Well, considering the questions you’re asking, I feel the need to make sure that isn’t how you’re feeling.”

“It’s not,” I confirmed. “I want you to stay, and I don’t regret what just happened. If anything, I’m very glad it happened. I don’t think I’ve felt that good during sex in a long time.”

“Then you were having sex with the wrong people.”

“Evidently so.”

He squeezed me gently and kissed my forehead. I felt the touch run through my entire body, from the place he kissed on my head all the way down to my toes.

“I meant what I said. About you being mine,” he said. “I’m not one to engage in meaningless sex. If that’s all you wanted, then I would leave and forget it ever happened. But, I don’t intend to let you go that easily.”

“I don’t intend to be let go.”

“Good.” He kissed me again. I couldn’t fight back the smile that tugged at my lips. “Go to sleep. We can talk about this more in the morning.”

I nodded and settled against his chest. “Goodnight Loki.”

“Goodnight, love.”

#loki #loki imagine #loki smut #loki x reader #tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston imagine #tom hiddleston smut #tom hiddleston x reader #marvel #mcu #imagine #one shot #smut #fanfiction #fanfic #fandom

[bones4thecats]

Omg you're on a writing spree!! Can I request for anubis, zerofuku and Loki with a reader who's very touch starve and like biting into their s/o neck or get bitten back? This is probably weird sksnodjd thank you In advance!!

A/N: I loved writing this! The version of Zerofuku I have chosen for this was Misfortune! Zerofuku (so dark him), since it woukd make more sense than Lucky! Zerofuku (light him) because he's basically a child in that form and 🤢. NOW! I hope you enjoy this!!

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🐶 This guy is one of the rare physically affectionate Gods in Valhalla, so when he heard or saw how touch-starved you were, he jumped into high-action

🐶 Anubis had been hugging you while resting in his temple one hot afternnoon

🐶 Despite the overwhelming temperatures, your husband seemed to be able to withstand these waves of hell like they were nothing

🐶 He was watching a scarab crawl on the floor as you held your head up and sunk your teeth into the flesh of his neck as he tilted his head

🐶 Anubis laughed as you let go and nuzzled into his chest

🐶 He figured you had grown into his habits, as he liked to nuzzle you and nibble, eventually leading to biting, you when bored and relaxing together

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👻 Zerofuku and you didn't really have much to do when he wasn't spreading misfortune

👻 He was surprised when he didn't somehow infect you with misfortune, and he was also thankful that you didn't seem to run away from him when you got the chance

👻 Because of his minuscule amount of work relating to the Gods, Zerofuku had decided to take a day off from doing his stuff and switch to relaxing

👻 He looked at you and smiled gently as you were coddled in his hair and arms

👻 Your eyes fluttered open as he looked up at the sky and at the passing crane overhead, and you took your opportunity

👻 You bit into his neck as he gasped and covered his face, which was bursting into a dark red color, and he groaned in pain and pleasure

👻 Letting his flesh fall out from your mouth, you moved down to the hole in his chest, leaving kisses along the rim before laying back down in his arms with his hair against your smaller form

👻 It's official, you broke the God of Misfortune

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🐍 This guy is definitely into a lot of crazy stuff

🐍 From biting to holding you in his lap with him shape-shifting into different people each time, this guy is a 50/50

🐍 50% of the time he is a sadist with you (though not as much as he is with others), and the other 50% he's a massive masochist

🐍 And today was one of those second 50% days

🐍 Loki was bored and hanging from a tree with you being held in his arms as he planned out his next prank against his cousin, Thor, and his uncle, Odin

🐍 You looked up, or rather down, at him and then at his neck before slowly moving towards the open flesh and bit into it roughly

🐍 Loki froze while he thought, his face lightning up and his eyes closing with a smile growing on his face

" Oh my little vixen, you're gonna regret that~ "

#Record of Ragnarok #RoR #Shuumatsu no Valkyrie #SnV #RoR Norse Pantheon #RoR Egyptian Pantheon #Record of Ragnarok Gods #RoR Gods #Record of Ragnarok x Reader #RoR x Reader #Shuumatsu no Valkyrie x Reader #SnV x Reader #RoR Norse Pantheon x Reader #RoR Egyptian Pantheon x Reader #Record of Ragnarok Gods x Reader #RoR Gods x Reader #S/O! Reader #GN! Reader #RoR Anubis #RoR Anubis x Reader #RoR Zerofuku #RoR Zerofuku x Reader #RoR Loki #RoR Loki x Reader

[deathmetalunicorn1]

RoR x Cheshire cat reader who has the personality and abilities as the Cheshire Cat from Alice in wonderland. The reader always has a grin on their face and likes to talk in riddles. Likes to play tricks on the gods and humans (but never could do it on Eve).

-You were definitely a unique person in Valhalla, and that was saying a lot, basing it on the other oddball people that inhabited, but you liked these other oddballs- you fit right in.

-There were those that you enjoyed pranking and teasing, harmless pranks like being invisible and appearing in random areas, scaring them, teasing them with your riddles and never giving a clear answer, but there were a few that you didn’t do anything like that to- and by a few, you only meant one person- Eve.

-Eve was a kind person, one who found your antics and riddles adorable, it… was unusual for you- you weren’t used to having others laughing and smiling over your antics. However, she was the only one to defend you, hugging you close when others try to yell at you, “Don’t you yell at my funny baby!”

-You didn’t hesitate to use that to your advantage, running to Mama Eve when you would get into trouble, something that others did find rather amusing.

-Some of your antics were amusing to others, especially with the more stoic members of Valhalla, Thor and Odin being your favorite ones.

-You spotted Thor, Odin, and Loki having tea together and you instantly grinned, turning invisible and you approached your target, Thor.

-Loki turned to Thor, to ask him a question and he instantly froze before he sputtered and busted into laughter, pointing as Odin looked at his son, finding a giant grin that was not his own over his lips.

-Odin rolled his eyes, “Y/N.” you floated away from Thor, who saw the grin and he glared slightly as you appeared, looking like you were lying on your belly, “Now you see me~ but I saw you first.”

-Loki grinned up at you, offering you a cookie which you took, Loki enjoyed your pranks, finding them funny while Odin spoke, “Is there something you needed, Y/N?”

-You rolled over, floating on your back, “Something or nothing~ I wonder if there is such a thing~” he groaned softly, annoyed with your actions before he lifted up the plate of cookies, “Just take some and leave- we don’t have time for you today.”

-You only took two more cookies, “I have to wonder what you have time for then, if you have no time for me?”

-He glared lightly and you grinned, disappearing, leaving only your mouth, “I’ll swing by at a later time. Now, then, or when?” Odin sighed softly, rubbing his one good eye lightly, “Stop laughing Loki!”

-You were definitely an oddball, but this was your home, with all the other oddballs.

#record of ragnarok #ror x reader #ror loki #ror thor #ror odin #ror eve

[divine-knight-hand]

Being Followed

Loki Masterlist || Full Masterlist || Read on AO3

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x Gender Neutral Reader

Summary: You aren’t the only one in the castle gardens, it would seem…

Content Warnings: Fluff, a little spiciness, and snake Loki!!!

Notes: I don't know why, but I had snake Loki on the brain today, so I wanted to do something about that.

Word Count: 637

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

The palace gardens were quiet. It was a comfortable silence. I strolled along, bathing in the warmth of the golden light from the setting sun. The fresh air went in through my nose, and out through my slightly parted mouth. Refreshing.

A faint hiss snapped me out of my trance-like state, and I frantically searched my surroundings for the creature it emanated from. As I spun in a wild circle, I caught it in the corner of my eye. A small green tail retreating into a nearby bush.

Relief washed over me as I let out a breathy laugh. “You startled me!”

I got another hiss in response, this time accompanied by the small rustling of branches.

I rolled my eyes, bringing my hands to my hips. “Are you looking to trick your brother with this form again? You know he hates that.”

A small green head poked out of the bush, darting its tongue out as its small black eyes blinked at me, feigning innocence. I knew better than to trust that.

I crouched down, reaching my hand out to the small creature. “Come on. The sun is setting, and I would prefer if my night was spent with you, rather than waiting for you to finish your shenanigans.”

The snake let out another hiss as it began to slither up my arm, and I slowly stood up, making sure it had time to settle itself on my shoulders.

“That’s better.” I let out a small sigh as the snake touched its scaly cheek to mine.

The sunlight retreated as the sky continued to darken, and I began to make my way back towards the castle.

“How long do you plan on staying like that?” I asked the snake on my shoulders, earning confused and frightened looks from nearby servants as I crossed the threshold into the palace. “I can’t exactly bed a slithering reptile, now can I?”

You tempt me, darling. Loki’s voice found its way into my mind as the snake hissed aloud by my ear. Trust me, it won’t be for much longer now.

I reached up to pet the snake’s scales, and it closed its eyes in a satisfied hiss as I softly stroked its head. “I apologize to have foiled your little prank for your brother. I suppose I’m just feeling a little needier than most days.”

Loki’s soft chuckle sounded in my head before I heard his voice again. Oh, darling. I was never waiting for Thor.

I turned my gaze to eye the snake as it cocked its head at me, blinking with that same feigned innocence again.

A smirk tugged at my lips as the realization of what he meant dawned on me. “How long have you been stalking me like this?”

Stalk you? Loki sounded playfully offended. I would never. I simply followed you at a respectable distance. Nothing more.

I snorted as I opened the door to our shared bedroom. “Sure, Loki. Sure…”

Would you prefer it if I stalked you? Loki mused as we stepped inside. Hunting you like prey? A dark chuckle echoed in my mind. Oh, the things I would do once I finally caught you…

I felt warmth creeping into my cheeks as a pang of desire hit me. “Maybe don’t tease me while you’re covered in scales.”

My apologies, darling. I felt the small weight of the snake drop off of my shoulders before a flash of green shone behind me.

Then, a hand on my shoulder coaxed me to turn and meet the face of my lover before he pulled my body closer to his. “Is that better?”

His now soft face was just inches from mine, our breaths intermingling between us, and I cupped it in my hands.

“Much better.” I breathed before closing the gap to kiss him.

#loki laufeyson #loki x reader #loki fluff #loki fanfic #loki #loki fanfiction #mcu loki #loki mcu #loki imagine #loki x y/n #loki odinson #marvel loki #loki marvel #loki fic #loki god of mischief