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dollslayer · 3 years

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Fight or Flight

Steve Rogers x Reader

Summary: Steve comes clean, in the aftermath and shock you turn to the one person who you know you can trust.

W/C: 2,369

Warnings: Implied cheating, angst, swearing

A/N: Hello! I wrote this for @sweetlyscared 's 1k celebration (congrats, it's well deserved!), prompt is in bold. I'm still pretty new to writing and this is my first true Angst fic so any and all reblogs/comments are super appreciated! Please check out my other stuff if you liked this fic!! Cheers!

PART TWO I Masterlist

____

The feeling of everything crashing around you was slow. Like your world was moving in slow motion as you processed the words. Everything else he was saying became distorted, going to waste as he tried desperately to explain himself to you. All you could hear clearly was your own breathing while you tried to will yourself to do something, anything.

Fight or flight is a funny thing, you were always so feisty and eager to fight back, A Bulldog, Steve had affectionately called you. But when he told you he was in love with someone else, that he has been in love with someone else for months, your body couldn’t find anything in it but to walk away.

Your breathing picked up and your eyes searched the ground, refusing to meet his. You felt your legs raise you up to stand and start walking away, unsure of your destination. When you pivoted to leave the room your eyes met his briefly, staring emotionlessly as his desperately searched for anything at all in yours.

“Where are you going? Doll, please, can we talk about this? I’m, I’m so sorry I-”

Whatever else he was saying wasn’t heard over the noise of opening the door and shutting it behind you. You didn’t know where you were going or what you were feeling other than the obvious. You were in a state of shock, it’s one thing to hear awful news and another to understand that it’s true but you were fastly approaching that truth head-on.

You paused for a moment in the hall and heard no movement come after you. You almost let yourself be surprised but he’d admitted he gave up on you a long time ago, so it only makes sense he wouldn’t fight your exit. You kept walking and tried to hold the floodgates of your heart closed for a bit longer.

Flashes of what was said come back to you slowly as reality sets in. “I can’t put this off any longer. I want you to know that I will always love you, but there’s someone else.”

Your head hurt like it would as if you were already crying, the blood pumping in your ears and pressure building in your temples that would no doubt evoke a long-standing headache. Your face felt hot as you stepped into the elevator, maybe you’d go for a walk in an attempt to fend off your tears. Or maybe you’d walk to a safer place to have an emotional breakdown. Whichever is easier.

Brisk gusts of air greet you as you exit the building, making you realize you left your jacket on the arm of the couch. You took a second to evaluate yourself and noticed you’d also walked out in your house slippers and a thin pair of leggings. Trying to evade the cold you tucked yourself in the doorway of a bodega down the street and dialed Bucky.

Two rings and he picked up.

“Hello?”

“Did you know?”

The silence on the line only reminds you of the blood pumping in your ears. The silence tells you everything you needed to know.

“Liste-”

You hang up.

You’re breathing even harder now. Who else knew? For how long? How long was I the joke? You need to find somewhere else to be soon or all these strangers are going to get an eyeful of a grown woman sobbing. You dial the last number you’d expect to at a time like this.

“What’s happening, shortstack?”

You can hear Tony’s grin through the phone and his easy greeting gives you momentary comfort.

“Can I come over? Something happened.”

“I’ll let Jarvis know to let you in” Tony’s tone is understanding, not needing you to explain further, just letting you know you can come to him.

____

Tony’s only seven blocks from yours and Steve’s shared apartment, a fact you’re grateful for when you feel your feet aching every time they hit the pavement. The conversation replays in your head, you try to word what happened in your head and your anger starts overtaking the heartbreak. It’s almost a welcome reprieve from the settling heartbreak but you’re not sure if you’d rather be numb to it completely.

When the elevator doors open Tony’s waiting for you with two tumblers of scotch in hand. You shake your head and move past him to the couch. He joins you on the opposite armchair and sets both his elbows down on his spread knees, resting his face in his hands.

“Would you like to talk about it or not talk about it?” He asks with a sigh.

You don’t make eye contact with him so you don’t cry, choosing to focus on the Iron Man coffee table book you’d gotten as a gag gift for Tony all those Christmases ago. It almost distracts you enough to laugh, the fact that he just has it out. But you need to tell someone what happened and get it all out before you can let yourself feel it all.

“Steveisinlovewithsomeoneelse,” You rushed it all out in one breath afraid if you didn’t get it out fast enough that you’d break. “He has been for months. He said he doesn’t know when it all changed but when he was with her things just clicked,” you paused to collect yourself, “But don’t worry, I’ll always hold a special place in his heart and he hopes this won’t affect the future of the team or our friendship.”

“Oh, and he’s really sorry.” you added.

You laughed bitterly and shook your head in disbelief. His delivery had been so cold but so sincere, very to the point but pained in its delivery. “I just, whatever we had, it’s just gone. Things are just different now, with her, this kills me though, please believe me. You’re still really special to me.” Bullshit. Special enough to act as a placeholder until someone better comes, special enough to cast aside.

You’re broken momentarily from your spiral into anger by the sound of a glass hitting a coaster a little too hard. Looking up, you find Tony quietly seething. He and Steve aren’t close by any means so you figured that he wouldn’t have known, it’s why you called him over anyone else.

He moves slowly to your side on the couch and pulls you into his side. You can smell his aftershave and what you think might be burned grease from one of the many things he’s been tinkering with in the lab, it smells like him, like comfort.

“That fucking asshole. Unbelievable, I don’t even…” He leaves the thought unfinished.

His hands move up and down your arms in a soothing motion and you finally let yourself have it. You don’t even realize you’re crying until you feel the tears wet his shirt when you bury your face in. You sniffle up tears and snot when your face heats up.

There’s no way to know how long Tony lets you sob into him, no doubt ruining his vintage Depeche Mode shirt. Somewhere in the back of your mind you make a mental note to buy him a new one later. But for now you’ll just allow yourself to cry and you can deal with the world in the morning.

____

Tony lets you fall asleep on his chest, feeling somewhere between furious and heartbroken by proxy. He thinks about letting you sleep and giving Steve a piece of his mind but figures that’s not what you need right now. Your phone sits on the table and he touches the screen to check the time. No notifications on your homescreen except for a missed call from Bucky and an old photo of Steve making a funny face as your background.

Had Steve not even tried to call you? Had he not even tried to go after you? Why was Bucky of all people the only one to be trying to get a hold of you? Prick.

Selfishly Tony is glad that he has a good reason to be rude to Steve now, he has to admit. You two had always been close but when you and Steve started dating he saw less and less of you. He couldn’t fault you for it though, you were so in love with Steve and you knew that the relationship between the two of them was strained so you kept your distance a bit.

He thought of all the sacrifices you’d made for Steve. You gave up your childhood home in the Bronx that your parents had willed to you to move in with him because he wanted you to be closer to the tower. You gave up a promotion and transfer to DC when you were still just an agent, granted you were an avenger now but it doesn’t matter, he’d made a very big deal out of you turning it down. You gave up the friendship the two of you had.

It was incredible, really. How much you had done for him only for him to turn around and love someone else behind your back. Brave enough to fight aliens and terrorists but too cowardly to break up with you and leave you with some dignity. Did anyone else know about this?

Tony had to stop himself from getting too angry, afraid he’d wake you up. So instead he went back to plotting up schematics for the half-finished suit mod he’d been in the middle of when you called.

____

It’s been a week and you still haven’t properly talked to Steve. After two days on Tony’s couch you need to look at things from a logical stance. Where am I going to stay? It’s not like you had your parent’s place anymore and you didn’t want to sign a new lease on an apartment. You could always move into the tower but that meant a higher chance of running into Steve.

You were thinking about all of this out loud to Tony when he offered you the guest bedroom in his penthouse. You were shocked, he’s always been a generous man but after you drifted apart from him you were surprised he even let you stay these past few days. Maybe now was a good time to rebuild your friendship with him and have some space from work.

What’s work going to be like? You agree and go on a temporary leave from the team, just a month to collect yourself. If you really wanted to you could go back but the thought of seeing everyone that knew about Steve’s affair was humiliating and enraging in one go.

It turns out Sam had been playing therapist to Steve in all of this, Nat figured it out through some sleuthing, and Wanda had inadvertently heard his thoughts about her. And none of them thought to tell you? To save you from the anguish but to let it fester? Steve wasn’t the only one that betrayed you. They all had.

What will I say to him? Should I say anything to him? Turns out the answer was ‘nothing’. You texted him to let him know you were moving out and you’d be by to get your things as a courtesy. You walked into an empty apartment and you were almost relieved.

He’d chosen to not be here but he’d left you a letter on the kitchen counter next to a framed photo of the two of you on vacation last year. You scoff but don’t touch the letter. Every ounce of restraint you have is being used as you leave it untouched. But you don’t need to know what excuses or apologies he has on deck, nothing he could say would exonerate him of his wrong-doings. You had no intentions of speaking to him but secretly you hoped he suffered as he stewed in his guilt and inner-turmoil. He deserves to.

When you pack you leave every gift he ever gave you, taking only what you’d brought with you in the first place. You take one look at the unmade bed and almost go to make it out of habit but then you think of the two of them there together. All the long missions you went on without him, all the times you stayed late at work or went out with your friends. How many times had he been here with her while you were there?

You end up only leaving with two suitcases and a backpack full of things. Tony waits for you in the lobby, understanding you wanted your space when you went to get your things in case Steve was there.

The elevator doors open to him taking a selfie with a couple of fans and shaking hands. He’s all too happy to be recognized but when he sees you his eyes soften. Not out of pity, but fondness, like he’s proud of you for getting out.

He sends you a questioning look with a silent question. Are you okay?

You smile at him and for the first time in days it’s a genuine, non-placating, happy-to-see-you smile. It’s okay, I’ll be okay.

He takes one of your suitcases from you and helps you load them into the back of the car before opening the door for you. The drive back to Tony’s is silent but comfortable. The trust you have in each other is strong and unspoken. Something you’ve always been grateful for between the two of you.

He doesn’t ask you about Steve or what happened, always letting you come to him first, which you appreciate. And when you talk he just listens. No bullshit unsolicited advice about moving on or how everything happens for a reason or getting back out there, just listens.

You know the road ahead is long and it will be difficult, but you have someone in your corner and the knowledge that what happened isn’t your fault and that you’re a badass and fuck Steve Rogers and fuck anyone else that did you wrong in all of this. Maybe you’ll forgive them someday but for now you’re gonna focus on you and work on building yourself back up. You’re ready for the ups and downs, you’re ready to fight.

#sweetlysad1kchallenge #steve rogers x reader #tony stark & reader #steve rogers angst #angst #implied cheating #marvel fic #marvel au #marvel x reader

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pathetic-dumpling · 3 years

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Coming to Terms

Dream has been having a bad day, which has quickly turned into a bad week. Techno and Phil both need to go out and do essential tasks around the tundra, but they can't leave Dream alone either. So... they find a babysitter. words: 5,188 - read on ao3 instead

CW: overstimulation, implied panic attack, unintentional self-harm, referenced abuse

Dream has been having a bad day. Correction, he’s been having a bad week. He’s been caught in a bit of a spiral for the last several days, and the exhaustion from an attempt at healing keeps dragging him down before he can get out. The last thing Techno wants to do is leave Dream alone like this, but he and Phil have already pushed off as many necessary tasks as they can. They need to head out, but they can’t leave Dream alone… So in comes the Syndicate.

They consider a few people. Niki is chosen.

“Look, all you need to do is watch him for a day. We’ll be back by the end of it, and you can leave, alright?”

Niki scrunches her face up, which is, in all honesty, reasonable. She’s one of the people who didn’t want to interact with Dream, but Techno and Phil are running desperately low on options.

“Is there anyone else?” She asks. “What about Puffy? She’s a therapist, right? Wouldn’t she be more equipped for something like this?”

“A, we don’t want more people knowing about Dream than necessary, and she’s already refused to give Dream treatment. B, we don’t trust her to not psychoanalyze Dream when he really doesn’t want to be psychoanalyzed. Plus, we don’t know what kind of domestic issues there are because Dream hasn’t opened up about that part of his life yet.”

Niki winced. “What about Ranboo?”

“Well, you see, Ranboo’s been growing into himself recently,” Phil interjects, beside Techno. “Which is good, by all means, but that also means he’s been embracing that he’s a little bit of a dick sometimes. You’re literally the only person we can think of who can be… pleasant and hold your tongue around Dream.”

“And- and we don’t wanna sound misogynistic,” Techno quickly adds. “This isn’t a ‘the kind woman puts up with the toxic man’ situation; it’s just… Dream is fragile right now, like, really fragile, and we’re pretty sure you’re the only person who has the kind of self-restraint to not break him any more, you know?”

Niki raises a brow but ultimately sighs. “This is your only option?”

“Yes.”

“Yeah, pretty much,” Phil laughs.

“...alright. I’ll watch him. One day, got it?”

“Oh my gods, thank you so much, Niki.”

So Niki is given keys to the house. Mentally, she prepares for whatever Dream might try. She saw him, briefly, in a Syndicate meeting or two, but only between several layers of fabric and zero spoken words. She doesn’t know what he’s like if he’s grown out of his… nastier habits yet. Techno has done everything in his power to tell the Syndicate that Dream has changed, but none of them have actually seen any change. Niki kind of doubts it, if she’s being honest, but she trusts Techno’s judgment more than anything. She knows Techno wouldn’t lie to her and lead her on like others in the past.

She wakes up the following day when things are still dark. Niki can see her breath, even within the small haven of an underground city warmed by countless fires and lanterns. She throws on her Syndicate cloak, getting ready to head out to the arctic. Hopefully, Techno didn’t want her to do anything with the animals because she definitely wouldn’t be able to stand being outside for that long. When she arrives, Techno thanks her profusely. He pledges to show her around the house and offers a few tips while Phil gets ready for their trip outside.

“Alright.” Techno swings his hands by his sides. Niki has noticed he’s stopped clapping them when he begins to speak. “First things first, Dream hasn’t eaten in, like, three days, so we really need you to try to get him to eat something. His diet has been pretty limited so far, but we left a list of things he’s been able to eat so far on the counter. Try to stay fresh- anything stale makes him throw up, and so does steak. Don’t offer it. We keep apples in a little icebox downstairs because he likes fruit cold. Also, Dream likes himself cold, too. He gets anxious when he’s hot.

“If Dream hides in his room, he’s most likely hiding under his bed. If you need to interact with him during that time, do not try to pull him out. That will scare him and he might bite. Instead, just kind of lay on the floor and face him and just… wait until he’s ready to talk. If you try to push him, he’ll probably just curl up more, and he tends to get really distant for the next day or two when that happens.

“If he asks for something, it means that he needed it about three hours ago and has only now gotten the courage to ask for it. Even if he prefaces it between a lot of ‘only if you want to’ and ‘you don’t have to,’ don’t believe him. We’re trying to teach him that asking for things is good but it’s been a bumpy ride. Also, he’s iffy on touch; I’d say it’s better to not try.”

Techno stops, tapping his lip. “Try not to let him outside without supervision; we haven’t really been able to block off potential hazards yet. Other than that, I think that’s everything. Dream is sleeping right now, but he knows you’ll be here. He might get startled anyway. Try not to stare or anything. It makes him uncomfortable. Just treat him like a nervous cat or something.”

Niki blinks, trying desperately to process all of the information that was just dumped on her. Techno waits patiently as she mentally backtracks and tries to commit everything to vague memory. Nervous cat? That’s what the ruler of the server has turned into?

“Okay… I think I got all of that?” Niki says, hoping she got everything she truly needed down. She knows how awkward things get when she or Techno has to start repeating themselves.

“Cool.” Techno sighs, running a hand through his hair until it gets caught in his braid. “A nervous, injury-prone cat… That’s Dream. Thank you for doing this, really. Dream just started being okay with being in the same room as boiling water, and I think I might have a breakdown if I have to leave to make tea again. This means a lot. Anything you need from us, me or Phil, we’ll be happy to help as soon as we get back.”

Niki nods. “Honestly, I didn’t think this would be on the agenda when I joined the Syndicate, but I’m happy to help you, Techno.”

“Of course.” Techno bows his head. “Of course. We’ll be back as soon as we can. Again, don’t let him… do anything to himself, okay?”

Niki gives another nod and a thumbs up. “You can count on me, Techno.”

Techno gives a strained smile and then, awkwardly, does a slight bow before leaving. His muffled voice filters through the door as he calls out to Phil, and then they head out. Niki takes in a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds before sighing as she watches the silhouettes of her friends disappear over the horizon.

Alright. She can do this. She may not like Dream, but she did agree as a part of the Syndicate to… help. This is just for Techno and Phil, to keep them from worrying. To watch Dream and make sure he doesn’t try anything he shouldn’t. Niki could do that. In fact, she was happy to keep the man out of trouble, if it were for Techno’s sake. Now she just needed to find something to do until there was someone to watch.

Niki glances around the house, finding things pleasantly clean. The chests were a bit of a mess, but things weren’t lying all over the place, and it looks like it’s been cleaned recently. It looks like the house has been somewhat baby-proofed, too, which makes a little chuckle bubble in Niki’s throat. They’ve only been housing Dream, and he’s certainly a grown man, isn’t he? What would they need to keep him out of drawers for?

Niki gets to entertaining herself with one of Techno’s many book recommendations, making a tiny home for herself on the couch. She opens the blinds and curtains, letting any sort of light filter in as much as it can. The sun is slow to rise in the arctic, and candlelight can only do so much. Slowly, as the sun rises over the north, Niki finds herself growing more hungry, so she starts making some food. It gets bright soon after that, lighting up the room with the near-blinding rays of the sun. Niki adjusts soon enough, simply happy to have more than enough reading light.

A few hours later, after Niki has already eaten and taken care of her share of the dishes, Dream emerges. The first thing she notices is that he’s completely maskless. Secondly, he looks exhausted to the bone, drowned in a dark green jacket and a black shirt underneath. Loose-fitting pants cover Dream’s legs, almost completely hiding his figure from view. Dream’s eyes are dark, his posture slouched inward, and his hair is messy, long, and frail. He looks unbearably tense. His eyes squint at how bright it is, but he tries to shake it off quickly with a flick of his hands. He does a quick double-take on Niki, eyes darting around the room before relaxing slightly. His attention never leaves her, though. His gaze makes a shiver crawl up Niki’s spine.

“Good morning, Dream!” She says politely because maybe Dream is worse in the mornings.

Dream waves tiredly, and Niki notices his bandaged finger. Something about it looks off until she realizes it’s too short to be normal, missing nearly the entire first section. She wonders how it happened, how she’s never noticed before. Dream takes his bandaged hand, dragging it down his face. He lets out a long sigh, sitting down at the circular table in the kitchen, leaning heavily on it for support. He raises his hands, and although they tremble and shake, Niki recognizes one thing. Dream is signing.

Oh. It looks like Technoblade forgot to mention one thing.

“Oh!” She says quickly, tucking her book into her chest. “I’m so sorry, I don’t know sign language.”

Dream, from the table, raises a brow at her. He raises his hands, signing what Niki can only assume is: you don’t know sign?

“I always meant to learn, but the only people who use it actively on the server are Callahan and….”

Me. Niki can guess that one well enough.

“Yes… you. I’m sorry.”

Dream waves his hand dismissively. He gestures for a pen, which Niki retrieves without much hesitance. She may not like Dream, but she still needs to communicate with him if this day even has a chance at going well. She places the pen and small pad of paper on the table, stepping back quickly. Dream lets out a long breath before beginning to write.

I’ll show you some stuff I probably won’t be able to translate in the moment, Dream writes. Writing looks a little more challenging with the ever-present tremor in Dream’s hands and his shortened finger, but he makes do. He writes down a few simple words: can’t, stop, no, sorry, and shows the signs for each of them. Niki furrows her brow.

“These are all negative responses. What about… ‘yes’?”

Dream struggles to meet Niki’s eyes for a second, looking away almost immediately. He seems borderline uncomfortable. Slowly, he curls his hand into a fist, nodding it forward twice.

“Yes?” Niki asks in conformation.

Yes.

Niki nods, trying to commit this information, like everything else dumped on her today, to memory. Dream drops the pen after that, cradling his hands in his lap. They certainly… don’t stop shaking. Hm. Niki would ask about it, but she doesn’t really want to poke at any boundaries. Dream fiddles with his fingers, beginning to bounce his leg.

“Em-” Niki starts, catching Dream’s attention and picking at the back of her neck awkwardly. “Techno told me that you should probably eat today, right? I made food a few hours ago, but I can make something for you or….”

Dream waves his hands, furiously shaking his head. He scribbles down variants of I’m not hungry, and you don’t have to, which Niki isn’t given a chance to object to. Dream carefully gets up, grabbing the notepad beside him and pushing past Niki. He makes his way over to the couch, plopping himself down and sighing. Niki watches him, unsure of what entirely to do. She knows what Techno told her, but there was only so much that was truly in her power. It didn’t help how dismissive Dream appeared to be with her attempts at offering him food.

This Dream is… new, to say the least. She didn’t know the old Dream outside of what she heard from her peers, but she especially doesn’t know this Dream. Is he better? Does he know that what he’s done is bad? Terrible? Unforgivable, even? Does he regret it at all, or does he just think he’s a victim in all of this?

It takes two more attempts at getting Dream to eat before Niki’s patience starts running a little slim. She’s never had the time to talk to Dream before, but right now, he just seems nothing more than tired. He looks fine, if not a little skinny, maybe a little quiet. For all Niki knows, this could be a ploy, a trick, to live the high life off of Techno’s dedicated care and then run off into the woods. Niki feels a little nasty for thinking this, but what if Dream is just faking this all? What if he’s just playing it up for show and sympathy? To get free protection while his next plan brews quietly in the background? She’s heard about the lengths Dream was willing to go to in the past; what would make this different? She knows how convincing an actor Dream can be, and dedication to a part can take someone a long way.

Well… Now is as good of a time as ever to get a few things off her chest, Niki supposes. If Dream isn’t faking, he’ll have some kind of genuine reaction, and if he is, then, well… Niki can keep her friends from getting used again. It’s a win-win, really.

“You know, you’re very lucky Techno decided to care for you so much,” she says from the kitchen because the distance makes her feel safer. “He didn’t have to do all of this, you know? It’d certainly be easier for him to have ignored your favor. I would’ve.”

From behind, Niki hears a sharp intake of breath, but no objections come. Niki looks behind her at Dream, still sitting on the couch, wide-eyed and staring at her. He swallows, eyes darting to the side like he’s sorting through his thoughts. He gestures at Niki, a sort of go-on movement, so she turns around and continues. “Things like Wilbur, Doomsday, the festival, you played a role in all of those, you know? You’ve been the authority figure of the server for so long. You-- you had control over exile and Tommy and… Everything you’ve done, it’s hurt all of us. It’s- it’s hurt me, and I-”

There’s a loud, distinct sniffle behind Niki. Slowly, she turns to look behind her, finding Dream curled up on the couch. He brings his knees up to his chest, pressing tightly into himself. He’s looking to the side, almost shameful. His shoulders are shaking.

“...Dream?” Niki asks. Maybe this is the genuine reaction she’s looking for.

Dream nods sharply. He looks up, meeting Niki’s eyes, his own glassy and red and wet. His eyes fill with tears, so he quickly hides his face again, pressing it into the arm wrapped around his knee. It feels like he’s forcing himself to keep his gaze on Niki, and that information tastes a little bitter going down Niki’s throat. He lifts his head just enough to meet Niki’s eyes again, folding his hand into a half square and pressing it to his temple. Niki doesn’t know the sign, but she doesn’t need to.

I know, he says. I know.

Dream takes a shuddering breath, fingers dancing across the parts of the body he’s gripping. They speed up and slow down as he filters his thoughts, eventually coming to a standstill. He grabs his notepad with trembling hands, scribbling down something hastily, ripping out the paper, and holding it out for Niki while hiding himself. Nervously, Niki steps forward because the memory of powerful and quick and ruthless Dream has never left her, even when presented with the sight of the trembling man before her.

I know, the paper says. I want to listen. But not today. I can’t today.

Niki swallows. She looks at Dream, trembling and crumbling in on himself, and nods. “Okay,” she says. “I understand. I… I’m sorry. That was out of line, I...”

Dream nods quickly and sharply. His fingers tap quickly against his leg. Niki feels awkward, standing in front of Dream like this as he fidgets and shuffles. She puts a little distance between the two of them, retreating back to the kitchen. The house is plunged into a small period of unrelenting silence. Niki wished that she knew at least a little sign because maybe things wouldn’t be so awkward. Dream doesn’t look all too thrilled to be talking with her either way, though, so perhaps it was wishful thinking. He’s running a hand through his hair, pausing to tug on the long strands every few seconds.

Niki frowns. Has Techno told her anything about how to handle something like this? Sorting through her memory quickly tells Niki that, no, Techno hadn’t spilled anything helpful for a time like this. He’d asked Niki to make sure Dream didn’t do anything to himself, but certainly, he wasn’t that much of a danger to his own wellbeing, right? Techno had mentioned some other useful things, but he seems to have forgotten some details Niki would’ve loved to have. She sighs.

Niki supposes that the best she can do right now is swallow her words and try to be helpfully polite. To, in kinder words, simply watch Dream. She tried to ask him about some things here or there but mostly ended up talking at Dream instead of with him. That’s okay, Niki didn’t mind. She didn’t really go into today expecting some sort of riveting conversation, and the one she’d already tried to have ended oh-so-splendidly.

Suddenly, the sound of Dream’s stomach growling caught her attention. Niki looked back from her chunk of dough that she’d started kneading to fill the silence at Dream, who was caught like a deer in headlights. He looked to her quickly before starting off on what Niki thinks is a garbled bundle of excuses about how he wasn’t hungry again. Niki laughs kindly, making Dream’s hands pause mid-air.

“I’ll go get you an apple or something,” she says, running her hands under the sink to wash off the extra flour. “Techno showed me where everything was before you woke up. I’ll be back in just a second. Stay put, okay?”

Dream nods, hiding his face and giving a small thumbs up. The trip downstairs is quick, only interrupted by a skulk of three foxes Techno apparently kept in his basement. The box with cooled fruit was propped up, probably to keep the foxes out of it, Niki mused, if the scratch marks on the side were anything to go off of. Dream was sitting in virtually the exact same position Niki had left him in, nervously glancing at her when she approached. At least he’s good at following directions, Niki noted. She held out the apple, waited a long few seconds for Dream to take it, then set it on the table next to him. Dream’s eyes watched her with rapt attention, almost like he was afraid she was suddenly going to turn around and attack him.

After that little experience, Niki went back to kneading dough as pleasantly as she could. She couldn’t explain the small smile that crept onto her lips when the inevitable crunch of an apple being eaten hit her ears after minutes of silence. Niki chalks it up to the fact that Techno would be happy that Dream ate and tries to move on from it as passively as she can.

Shuffling fills the corners of the house between the clanging of various pans and Niki’s humming. Dream had come a little closer, sitting stiffly at the counter and watching Niki work after throwing his apple core into Carl’s stable from the window. He keeps the notepad close to him, bouncing the pen back and forth against the solid surface. Niki greets him and starts explaining what she’s doing, to which Dream nods along. She tries to suggest Dream join the baking whenever she can, moving pans around and into the sink when they’ve become dirty. Dream’s eyes follow her hands as she gestures around, eyebrows twitching downward every few seconds. Every semi-loud sound makes his eyes blink in surprise and something else Niki can’t quite place. It goes on like this for about half an hour, with various levels of participation coming from Dream.

Eventually, he begins to look more and more lost in thought, distracted, even borderline frustrated, eventually dropping his pen roughly and tapping his pointer finger against the counter. His other hand goes to his hair, pulling, as a small whimper tumbled into the air. Dream’s nail makes a quick tap, tap, tap that sounds borderline panicky, only increasing in speed. His shoulders are tense, and because Niki is so used to providing comfort to those unscarred by touch, she reached out for his shoulder.

Dream jerks away as soon as her hand meets his shoulder, a small, distressed noise leaving his throat. He stumbles onto shaky legs, looking almost as if Niki burned him. Niki, in return, pulled her hand back to her chest. Dream holds up a finger, a small give me a moment, before distancing himself. He hangs his head and holds up his hands, shaking them out almost violently as he paces the living room.

“Dream?” Niki begins to ask, watching the man pace and shake his hands. What was he doing? What was going on?

Her thoughts are abruptly cut off by a sharp yelp when Dream suddenly turns and pushes over a chair. This is still Dream at the end of the day, and once upon a time, he was terrifying and dangerous. Niki clamps her hands down over her mouth to keep any further sound from escaping when it makes Dream flinch. His breath picks up in shakiness and speed until a loud crash makes the house go silent.

Dream’s head whips around, finding a pile of shattered glass on the floor next to the chair he flipped over and the table it apparently took on its way down. He stares at it for a good, long second, the breath stolen from his lungs. A quick, strangled sob leaves Dream’s mouth as he drops to his knees, scrambling for the glass pieces. Hot, fat tears fill the corners of Dream’s eyes. His hands are shaking so much it makes the glass pieces he picks up clink against each other. Almost desperately, Dream tries to wipe away the tears, and Techno’s worry about Dream hurting himself suddenly becomes much more apparent as the world catches up to Niki.

“Oh- Dream, no, we- let’s not-” Niki drops to her knees beside Dream, holding her hands out gently. “Let’s not do that, okay? You’ve got glass in your hands.”

Dream doesn’t stop. The tears and sobs only spilling harder and faster. Niki doesn’t think this can get any worse, so she slowly puts her hand over Dream’s, grasping it and pulling it away gently. There’s no resistance, even as Dream digs his chin into his chest. Pricks of blood are already forming on scratches left on Dream’s cheeks from the glass, quickly mixing with tears. Dream starts signing something frantically, and Niki doesn’t know what he’s saying, but, oh, she wishes she did.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Niki tries. “Are you worried Techno will be angry?”

Dream nods, choking on another sob.

“I’m sure he won’t be!” Niki presents her hands, cupped, to Dream again. “He really cares about you, alright? He won’t be mad over a broken cup, okay?”

Dream makes a strangled sound that almost sounds like a “but” as he snaps his head up to face Niki.

“No. No buts.” Niki pushes her hands forward pointedly. “I’ll clean up the glass, okay? I think you should go lay down on your bed and rest. Calm down a little, alright? I’m supposed to be here to help, and Techno would be upset if you hurt yourself. I’ll let you know when everything’s been taken care of.”

Shakily, Dream brings his free hand up to his face, fingers touching the newly formed cuts as his lips trace Niki’s words. His eyes go wide, pressing down on the tiny bubbles of blood forming. He drops the glass into Niki’s hands, staggering up with a sharp breath. He mutters something too faint for Niki to catch before disappearing into his room. Niki picks up the rest of the glass, her hands thankfully much steadier than Dream’s own despite what just happened. Periodically, she glances up to Dream’s room, watching, waiting.

She isn’t quite sure what she’s waiting for, maybe for him to come bursting out, angry at being coddled, or perhaps for him to come slinking back with shaky hands and hot tears and try to help again. Whatever it is, it never comes.

Carefully, Niki spends a few minutes making sure no shards had spread out over the house or that she misses any finite pieces. After her searches come back clean, Niki moves to the knocked-over furniture. She rights the table and chair Dream had knocked over, huffing out a small sigh of relief. The living room was clean again, thankfully. She hopes Techno won’t be mad. That would just make her look bad when Dream was so clearly distressed over the whole ordeal.

At the thought of Dream, Niki makes her way over to his room. She knocks, the wood giving way and opening up into the small room. Dream lays on his bed, curled up into a ball, and appears to be fast asleep. The blankets look almost deliberately untouched around him. Niki steps into the dark room, noting the closed blinds on his window. Everything is kept down to nearly a depressing minimum, the only trace of life in the room being the messy, yet unmoved, sheets and a single flowerpot laying on a chest.

It would be better to let him sleep, Niki thinks. The room is kept cold, and Niki doesn’t want Dream to get sick, so she decides to drape the untouched sheets over Dream’s sleeping form. As she pulls up the blankets around the sleeping body, though, Dreams’ eyes flutter open, and his body tenses. He turns his head to watch her silently.

“I’ve cleaned up the glass, so the living room is good to be in again,” Niki offers. She pulls her hands away, crouching down so she doesn’t loom over Dream. “I was going to let you sleep; sorry for waking you.”

Dream shrugs, not really looking like he had been sleeping in the first place. He sits up, glancing at the sheets pooling around him. Dream glances around, scrubbing at his face and swinging his legs over the side of his bed. Despite Niki’s protests, he gets up and shuffles his way into the living room. His eyes fall on the now empty space on the table, sucking in a soft, shuddering breath. Niki comes to stand beside him.

“Hey,” she says. “It’s okay. I’m not angry, and they won’t be either, okay?”

Dream’s eyes flit from the table down to Niki. His body, slouched forward, leans a little closer to her as he nods silently. He looks back to the room, eyes squinting. He shoves his hands in his pockets and produces the pen and paper he’d kept on him; scribbling down, can you close the blinds? Niki smiles. She needs to encourage him to ask for things, too.

“Sure.”

Dream makes a home for himself on the couch. He eyes Niki’s book and they make idle chatter over it, Niki sitting across from him in the chair. They slide the notepad between each other on the table, both patiently waiting for the other to read or write before responding. Dream apologizes for the outburst. He said that he was feeling overwhelmed and hasn’t had to deal with something like that in a long time. The apology was accepted. Niki even manages to get a small laugh out of Dream, one that tugs gently on his throat and makes his chest stutter. It’s nice to see Dream’s smile, the way it cracks his face as he chuckles to himself. Somehow, it’s the most pride she’s felt in a while.

When Niki gets up to make herself some food, Dream takes her up on the offer to eat together. The list Techno left with what Dream could eat suddenly became very useful when preparing dinner. He doesn’t eat much and apologizes about it, for the hassle he must be causing, but it was what Niki was expecting anyway. Dream goes to sleep soon after that, pausing at his door and sending a quick, earnest thank you to Niki. She smiles.

“You’re welcome, Dream.”

Techno wasn’t mad, and neither was Phil. They seemed more focused on the fact that Dream actually ate a decently sized meal for the first time that week than anything else. Dream, who was hovering in the back, made sure to send Niki off with a little wave.

If she feels a little protective over him during the next Syndicate meeting, that was only her business. If she spoke in a hushed tone and kept an eye on him so he wouldn’t get into trouble, it was just general caution mixed with a bit of care. When she brought the loaves of bread with her on a visit, they were for Techno, Phil, and Dream, but she couldn’t deny the tiny bit of excitement that bloomed in her chest when Phil suggested Dream learn how to bake to help with tremors and outbursts.

If she let Dream into her stash or secret recipes for pies and bread, it stayed between them. Dream promised to keep them secret, and Niki didn’t doubt him. He smiled at her one day, growing nicely into the freckles that had started to speckle his skin, while his third batch of experimental dough was baking. Niki couldn’t help but smile back.

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noforkingclue · 3 years

Text

I Just Want To Sleep (Bucky x reader)

Summary: If you had a chance to get rid of your nightmares forever would you take it? Even if that solution was to share a bed with someone you just about tolerated?

Paring: Bucky Barnes x reader

Warnings: mutual pining, angst

MCU tag list: @geocookie21

Everything tag list: @greenrevolutionary

Everyone had nightmares, they were just another part of the job. It was known that most people got them, whether they lasted a couple of days after a mission or a lifetime. It was a fact that everyone knew about but just didn’t talk about it. That sort of thing wasn’t done.

Nightmares always varied from person to person but always involved what people were working on. The lives they failed to save whether from friends, colleagues or innocent bystanders. You were used to hearing people waking up screaming or sobbing, people going to therapy but never talking to anyone else about it. But those weren’t the worst types to have. The worst was when people remembered the lives of the innocents they had taken themselves. The sounds of breaking bones and skulls shattering, children crying over the bodies of their parents begging them to wake up although you knew they never would.

The nightmares that made you question whether or not you were the heroes or the villains. The ones that made you question your own morals.

You had forgotten the last time you had gotten a decent nights last as you laid awake looking up at the ceiling. Eventually you sighed and got out of bed knowing that you’d never get back to sleep. You walked into the small kitchen of the safe house and poured yourself a glass of water.

“Couldn’t sleep either?”

You jumped at the sound of Bucky’s voice breaking the silence of the night. You turned around and saw him lounging on the sofa, the blanket half hanging off of him. You made a point of only looking directly at his face, determined not to let your eyes wander over his bare chest.

“Same to you.” You said

“Everything alright?”

“Yes. Why shouldn’t it be?”

“Heard you scream.”

You hesitated for a moment before saying quietly,

“Just nightmares, nothing new. You?”

“Same.”

There was a beat of silence. You looked around, uncomfortable with where this conversation was going. You never spoke to anyone about your nightmares, even trying to avoid the topic with your therapist. Sam kept telling you it was unhealthy and while you knew he was right you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing it.

“Do you want to talk about it?” asked Bucky

“Do you want to talk about yours?”

Bucky’s silence told you anything. You gave him a pointed look as you took you water and left the room. Just because you and Bucky were working together didn’t mean that you had to open up completely to him. Not at all.

It was late (or early depending on who you asked) by the time you and Bucky collapsed back into the safe house. The mission took longer than both of you were expecting and all you wanted to do was curl up and sleep.

“My turn to take the sofa.” You said

Bucky had been insistent that you took the bed when you two work together. He was strangely adamant that you shouldn’t share and you guessed that it was some hangover from the nineteen forties. You had argued that it was unfair that he was forced on the sofa each night and forced him to alternate who took the bed.

“You should take the bed again,” said Bucky, “You need it more than I do.

“Don’t bullshit me,” you said, “You might be a super soldier but I saw how hard you got hit. Take the bed.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

You and Bucky glared at each other and while you were tired you weren’t about to give in. When Bucky smirked you knew he had a plan and when he laid down on the sofa he said,

“And where will you sleep now?”

“Move.”

“No.”

“Move please.”

“Make me.”

“If you don’t move right now I’ll sleep on top of you.”

“I don’t think you will.”

You smirked back at him before walked over and put your full bodyweight on him. Bucky groaned as you rested your head on his chest. Instinctively he wrapped his arms around you to prevent you falling off and you had to resist the urge to blush as he did so.

“You’re really stubborn you know that?” he said

“It’s one of my most endearing features.”

“You’re not moving are you?”

“Fine.” He grumbled

“Night Bucky.”

“Night y/n.”

You opened your eyes and groaned as the bright light assaulted them. Strong arms tightened around your waist and for a brief moment you had forgotten about what happened last night. You sat up with a jolt which caused Bucky’s grip on you to slip and for you to fall to the floor. Bucky sat bolt upright before looking down at you in amusement.

“Nice night Princess?” he asked

“What time is it?” you asked

Bucky shrugged and you glared up and you hunted for your watch. When you found it you blinked, not quite believing the time.

“Well?” Bucky asked as he lay back down

“What time did we get in last night?”

Bucky shrugged

“About three.”

“It’s ten in the morning.”

“Then you’re watch is wrong.”

“No it’s not. Fuck,” you ran your fingers through your hair, “I can’t remember the last time I slept for seven hours straight.”

“That isn’t healthy.”

“Oh and you’re the person who can comment on healthy sleeping patterns.”

“Never said I was doll.”

You looked over your shoulder and glared at Bucky when he used the nickname.

“Must’ve just been because we were tired,” you muttered, “That’s it!”

“Hmm.”

Bucky didn’t sound convinced and you rolled your eyes.

“You got a better idea?” you asked

Bucky sat up and swung his legs over the side of the sofa. You rested your back against the side of the sofa and looked up at him.

“Maybe,” he said slowly, “It has something to do with last night.”

“Last night?”

“When you fell asleep in my arms.”

“Only because you were being stubborn!”

“Right.”

You groaned and ran a hand over your face. You looked up at Bucky and you could see the hopeful uncertainty in his eyes. A way of helping your nightmares without having to openly discuss them with anyone else.

What did you have to lose?

“You’re taking up the whole bed!”

“No I’m not.”

“Well your leg is on my side.”

“This is a single bed. There are no sides!”

You and Bucky were back to back trying to cram into a too small bed. When it was just one of you the bed was the perfect size but it definitely wasn’t made for two people. You tried to pull some of the blanket over you but Bucky kept a firm grip on it.

“Give me some of that!”

“You have plenty.”

“Ugh,” you sat up and glared at him, “This was a stupid idea. Why did I even agree to it? Move, I’ll sleep on the sofa.”

“No, you’re not going anywhere Princess.”

“Excuse me?”

“Err,” Bucky just realised what he had said, “That came out creepier than I intended.”

“You don’t say.”

“But please, just one more night.”

You wanted to say no, you really did, but one look at his pleading gaze had you melting. You sighed and nodded. He gave you a dazzling grin as you laid back down.

“But you need to move over.” You muttered

“Don’t blame me,” came the answer, “I’m not the person you decided it was a good idea to only supply single beds.”

You shifted again and your leg brushed Bucky’s. For a brief second he pressed back against yours and you closed your eyes enjoying the sensation. You had forgotten how nice it was to sleep next to someone again even if the both of you might end up waking each other up with your nightmares. Eventually you heard Bucky sigh.

“It isn’t working like this.”

“I told you- hey!”

To your surprise Bucky didn’t get out of bed. Instead he pulled you into his arms. You were practically lying on top of him, your head resting against his chest. It was different from last time then you were half asleep but now you had never been more awake. Bucky moved so your leg slipped in between his and he rested his chin on top of your head. If anyone broke in now they’d probably mistake the two of you as a couple. You had never been more grateful that Sam had been out of the country.

“Better?” asked Bucky

“Yes.”

“You sure? You sound a bit-“

“I’m just tired.”

“Right. Night.”

“Night.”

And just like the night before you had the best night’s sleep in years, safely wrapped in the arms of a highly trained killer.

“What’s going on between you and Bucky? I left the two of you for a month and now you’re practically on top of each other.”

You couldn’t contain your blush as Sam looked at you over the rim of his coffee cup. He raised an eyebrow at your reaction and you said quickly,

“It isn’t what you think.”

“And what’ll that be.”

“We’re not sleeping with each other.”

“Right.”

“I mean, technically we are sleeping with each other.”

Sam, who had just taken a sip of his coffee, choked on it. He looked at you incredulously as you clarified,

“We’re not fucking. We’re literally just sharing a bed. I have absolutely no desire to have sex with Bucky Banes.”

“You’re probably one of the few people on this planet who wouldn’t.”

“Would you?”

Sam shrugged and you just rolled your eyes.

“But why? I thought you hated him.”

“I don’t hate him,” you said, “It’s just… complicated.”

“Complicated?”

“He helps… he helps with the nightmares.”

“You’re still having them.”

“Doesn’t everyone.”

“Y/n,” Sam said gently, “You need help.”

“I have a therapist.”

“Sharing a bed with Bucky isn’t going to fix things for the long run.”

“Might do.”

Sam gave you a disapproving look which you pointedly avoided. You knew deep down that he was right but you just couldn’t face talking about what had happened with anyone. You were too afraid, too paranoid, that your secrets would be leaked. That the trust you spent years rebuilding would be broken again in a heartbeat. You just weren’t ready to lose everyone again and if the solution to your problems meant Bucky then you gladly take it.

It was strange sharing a bed with someone after all these years. Bucky usually woke up early, usually after horrific nightmares about becoming the Winter Solider again and losing control. He would spend hours lying in bed, waiting for the sun to rise and the day to start again but now things were different.

Now he had you.

How calm and peaceful you looked when you slept, how your soft breaths made him feel at peace. The way your chest rose and fell and pressed against his. Bucky had been interested in your for a while, how most people avoided you and you only seemed to speak to Sam. How you avoided him when Sam first introduced the two of you until you were forced to work together. He wouldn’t lie, he was slightly jealous of how close you were to Sam even though he knew you relationship was strictly platonic.

Just like yours and his.

That’s the two of you were, colleagues, maybe even friends, cuddle buddies as you teasingly referred to it once. That’s something Bucky noticed, how you were slowly opening up to him. Slowly you once awkward conversations turned into slight teasing and, at least on his part, slightly flirting. Just the odd comment here and there just to see you blush and stumble over your words. Bucky thought it was cute how flustered you got over simple compliments and how you shyly returned them. He enjoyed the warm feeling he got whenever you flirted back even though neither of you were serious about it.

That was it, neither of you were serious about it. Bucky enjoyed your friendship at least that was what he was hoping this is. He liked the idea of you showing him your favourite films or books, showing him your favourite places around your home city. Him teaching you about his original time period, teaching you how to dance as he pulled you close while the two of you were awake. He closed his eyes and smiled as he slowly drifted off to sleep.

The two of you just being friends.

“Hey, a new restaurant just opened want to try it?”

“Can’t tonight Sam. I promise Buck that we’d watch Blade Runner tonight.”

“Blade Runner?”

“Yeah, never thought that he’d be a fan of Ridley Scott’s films.”

You held your mobile between your cheek and your shoulder as you put a bottle of wine in the fridge. Saturday’s were film nights between you and Bucky and you always looked forward to them. The nights when it was just the two of you curled up on your sofa. Bucky’s arm over your shoulder, a bowl of popcorn between you and an empty pizza box on the table. It was quickly becoming your favourite night of the week. You could practically hear Sam’s raised eyebrow through the phone and you quickly added,

“But I’m free tomorrow afternoon.”

“And since when did you call him Buck?”

This made you pause. You didn’t know when that change happened. It just seemed to develop gradually and seemed to fit.

“And you guys spend most nights together.”

“It helps with the nightmares.” You said quietly

“Really? You sure there isn’t another reason?”

“What are you implying?”

“Are you going out.”

“What! Sam! No! Buck and I are just friends.”

“Hmm.”

Sam didn’t sound convinced and you rubbed your eyes. You were glad that he couldn’t see your face as you could feel yourself blushing. The sound of knocking at the door gave you your escape and you jumped out of your skin when you heard it.

“Sorry Sam,” you said quickly, “Got to go.”

“Don’t think this conversation is over.”

“Ok, whatever, bye.”

You hung up and dashed towards the door. As you opened it and looked up into Bucky’s smiling face you knew the Sam’s words were going to be harder to forget than you initially thought.

You were right, you couldn’t get Sam’s words out of your head. They echoed around as Bucky pulled you close, seemingly engrossed in the film. You were just his friend but ow you longed to be more. How you wanted his eyes to light up whenever he saw you. In hindsight this was a stupid idea, sharing a bed with someone, even in a completely non-sexual way, something was bound to happen. Even if it was just missing the warmth of someone next to you while you slept.

You rolled over so you were facing Bucky. His arms were still wrapped around you and it surprised you about how easily it was to fall asleep in his arms, even with his metal arm curled tightly around you. You raised a hand and gently traced it alone his cheekbones and along his face.

Your gaze dropped to his lips as your fingers grazed along them. How you longed to feel them pressed against yours, to have his arms around you during the day and not just to help the both of you sleep at night.

Just then Bucky shifted in his sleep and rolled over. For a sickening moment you wondered if you had accidently woken him up, however, and much to your relief, that wasn’t the case. Bucky rolled onto his back and dragged you with him. You head was resting against his chest and you smiled as you rested against it and heard the steady thump of his heartbeat. You might as well make the most of it while it lasted.

After all, this couldn’t go on forever.

“Morning.”

You looked at Bucky as he entered your kitchen while you poured yourself a cup of tea. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders but you quickly removed yourself from his arms. These touches were becoming less platonic and more romantic especially since your conversation with Sam. You didn’t want to give Bucky the wrong impression or to get your feelings crushed.

“You ok?” he asked, “Did you sleep alright.”

“I slept fine.”

“Ok.” Bucky said slowly

You inhaled deeply as you turned so your back was facing Bucky. This was hard to do but you didn’t want to lead him on. You never meant to develop feelings for Bucky or for him to imagine that there was more to this than was originally planned.

“I think we need to talk.” You said at last

“Nothing ever good happens after those words,” Bucky said, “What’s wrong?”

You looked over your shoulder at him. Bucky was smiling softly but his eyes told a different story. Anxiety was laced inn them and you winced and looked away. You took another sip of your tea and Bucky took a step towards you. He lifted your chin and you looked in his eyes. You pulled your chin free and said,

“We need to stop this.”

“What?”

“This was a stupid idea,” you said, “I never should’ve agreed to it.”

“But it’s helping.”

You walked away as Bucky quickly followed you. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. He wasn’t meant to resist, he was meant to agree and let you go. It was supposed to be easy to let go of him.

“For you maybe.” You said

“What do you?”

“They’re back Bucky. My nightmares are back.

They weren’t, they hadn’t been back for months. You couldn’t stand seeing the pained look on Bucky’s face at your lie and you felt dirty for saying it. He took a step closer but stopped when you backed away.

“Why didn’t you say anything.” He said softly

“Because it was helping you.”

“Right.”

“So what are you going to do now?”

“See a therapist I suppose.”

“Good. I, umm, hope it helps.”

“Same.”

“I’ll umm, I should be going.”

“You can stay for breakfast.”

“No,” Bucky said sharply, then winced at his tone, “No,” he repeated softly, “I should leave. I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah, sure.”

It was only when the door clicked softly behind him that you allowed yourself to crumple on the ground, tears pouring down your face.

“What’s wrong.”

“Nothing.”

“That’s bullshit.”

“Drop it Sam.”

“Buck-“

“Don’t call me that.”

“Y/n can.”

Sam saw the way Bucky flinched when he said your name. Bucky was currently lying on Sam’s sofa which almost gave Sam a heart attack when he walked into his living room that morning. It was too early to deal with whatever happened between the two of you and Sam needed at least two cups of coffee before dealing with it.

“What happened.” He asked

“Nothing.”

“Then why does it feel like you’ve come here after she dumped you.”

“She didn’t dump me.”

“So you dumped her?”

“We weren’t dating.”

“But you were sharing a bed.”

“It wasn’t like that,” Bucky put a hand over his eyes, “It was just a way coping with our nightmares, at least,” he sighed, “I thought it was.”

“Oh?”

“Turns out she was still having them. Stopped it this morning.”

“Oh.”

Bucky looked over at Sam who was looking slightly guilty. He sat up and glared at his friend.

“Do you know what happened?” he asked

“No.”

“What do you say to her?”

“Nothing I wouldn’t say to you.”

“Which is.”

“You like her.”

“She’s my friend.”

“I mean,” Sam sighed, “You want to date her.”

“She’s my friend.”

“So? It’s obvious that you’re in love with her and she’s in love with you.”

“I don’t love her and she certainly doesn’t love me.”

“Then why are you here looking like you’re about to cry yourself to sleep after eating all my ice cream and watching shitty rom coms?”

“This was a bad idea.”

“Look, you can crash on my sofa if it makes you feel better,” said Sam, “But you need to sort this out with y/n. It’s hard enough listening to her when she talks about you.”

“She talks about me?”

The soft smile on Bucky’s face told Sam everything.

“All the fucking time.”

“What does she say?”

“Oh no,” Sam held up his hands, “You should talk to her about that.”

He heard Bucky’s groan as he collapsed back against his sofa. Sam could only hope that the two of you would stop dancing around each other and actually talk for once. He was getting tired of seeing you pine over one another.

“So, how long has it been since your last session with me?”

You shrugged.

“You have my notes Doc. You tell me.”

You therapist hummed in acknowledgement as she wrote a note in her notepad. You closed your eyes and tried to take calming breaths. This was a bad idea.

“So, tell me, how have you been?”

“Surviving.”

“Just that?”

“It’s been a shit couple of years. Give me some credit.”

“And what about your friends. You’ve been keeping in contact with them?”

“I talk to Sam.”

“Just Sam?”

“And Bucky.”

This earned you a raised eyebrow but nothing else.

“Sam introduced us,” you explained, “Couldn’t hang out with Sam without Bucky being there.”

“And are you two close?”

“Sam and I. Yes, he’s one of my closest friends. He was the only one who stuck with me after-“

You cut yourself off as your therapist said,

“Yes?”

“Doesn’t matter. You know what.”

“And what about you and Bucky.”

“It’s… complicated.”

“Want to elaborate.”

You were silent for a moment, weighing up your options, before you said,

“Nothing leaves this room right?”

“Of course.”

“Just making sure. We’ve been sleeping together.”

“You’ve entered a sexual relationship with the Winter Solider?”

“He’s not the Winter Solider anymore!” you exclaimed, “And no, it’s not sexual. We’ve just been sharing a bed.”

“Why?”

“It helps…”

“Helps with what?”

“My nightmares.”

“Y/n,” she sighed, “What did I tell you about your nightmares. If you’ve been having them you need to tell me.”

“They stopped when I was with him. Bucky helped me and I fucked up by stopping seeing him.”

“Right,” another hurried note, “And is this because you want your relationship with Bucky to become sexual.”

You flushed angrily and stood up. The therapist held your gaze before you said,

“This is over.”

As you marched out of the room you heard her call,

“Same time next week!”

You lasted one week, one week of constant nightmares before you cracked. You grabbed your phone and debated whether or not you should call him before swallowing your pride and calling him.

“Y/n.”

Bucky answered almost immediately. You smiled through your tears as you pulled your legs up to your chest.

“What happened? Are you ok? Talk to me.”

“I killed someone.”

Silence.

“Where are you.”

“In bed,” you said, “My mentor, that’s why I have these nightmares. She was a good person who fucked up. She was more like a friend than a teacher, taking me under her wing when no one else would. She never abandoned me and when she needed me the most I betrayed her.”

You took a shaky breath and continued,

“She betrayed us, SHIELD, she was selling intelligence. She was only doing it was she was being blackmailed, at least that was what she told me, but no one listened to her. Fury told me to bring her in but she wouldn’t listen. Told me that she’d rather die than be remembered as a traitor. There was a fight and I… and I…”

“Go on.”

“I stabbed her. I killed her. I held her bleeding body in my arms as she died. She told me that she’d been lying, that she wasn’t being blackmailed, that she did it for the money. This person that I had been defending with my entire being was a traitor. Afterwards nobody could look me in the eye. I don’t know if it was out of pity or mistrust. Sam was the only one who didn’t treat me any differently. He understood my pain, my conflict, he defended me. I still have nightmares of her, laughing at my foolishness as I choke the life out of her each night for the pain she put me through. Does that make me a bad person?”

“No.”

“No?”

“Compared to me, you’re a saint. You’re a good person who was in a difficult situation. You didn’t want to betray your friend. You’ve been hurt and you want revenge on the person who caused that. You’re not a bad person and never think that.”

“Buck?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.”

“You’re a good person too.”

“I think you’re one too.”

That earned you a chuckled down the phone and you found yourself smiling at the sound.

“Princess,” Bucky said, “You don’t know how wrong you are.”

“I’m a fairly good judge of character.”

“Only when you’re awake. You sound half asleep. Get some rest.”

“What about y-“

“Don’t worry about me. Just try and get some sleep.”

“Anything for you Buck.”

“Good girl.”

“Good night.”

“Night.”

You hadn’t heard from Bucky for several weeks and every day you were debating on whether or not to call him. To hear his voice down the phone, for him to come over, to launch yourself into his arms and tell him how sorry you were. How you regretted ever telling him that you needed to stop this, that you missed him, that you loved him.

For the third night in a row you lay in bed staring up at the ceiling. You couldn’t get off to sleep, fears of seeing your dead mentor’s face filling you with dread. You continued with therapy and while it was helping it made you realise how much you missed Bucky. Suddenly a pounding at your door caused you to sit bolt upright. You hardly ever got any visitors especially at two in the morning.

“Y/n, y/n it’s me. Open this door. Please.”

Bucky.

You wasted no time in jumping out of bed and sprinting to your door. You flung it open and Bucky practically fell inside. His arms wrapped around you and pulled you into a tight hug. You walked backwards, still in Bucky’s arms, and he kicked the door closed behind him. When you felt your shoulder getting damped your eyes widened and you slowly returned the embrace.

“Bucky,” you said quietly, “What happened.”

“I kill you.”

“Umm.”

“Well, not me, he did. I wasn’t in control but I could feel everything. I was powerless to stop him as he took you away from me. I couldn’t… I couldn’t go on without knowing that it was all a nightmare. That you’re still alive.”

“I am,” you rested your head against Bucky’s shoulder, “I am. Fuck, I’m such an idiot.”

“Don’t say that.”

“No, I am. I never should’ve stopped this but I was afraid.”

“Afraid.”

Bucky looked up and you gave him a sad smile.

“I was afraid that you wouldn’t feel the same. That I have fucked up because I never expected to get used to this. To being with you and I knew that you didn’t feel the same. That I was just your friend, so I ended it before my feelings developed any further. I thought I was saving myself from pain and I ended up just hurting both of us. I lied Bucky, my nightmares did stop when I was with you but I was afraid of getting hurt.”

You buried your head against Bucky’s chest. His arms tightened around you as he rested his chin on top of your head.

“You have no idea,” he said at last, “How painful it has been to wake up in an empty bed. To know that you were out there and possibly in pain. That I was using you to actually fall asleep while you were in pain.”

“I hurt you though. I was selfish.”

“And I was being selfish as well.”

“No you weren’t.”

“Yes I was.”

“No you weren-“

You didn’t get to finish your sentence. Bucky had lifted your chin and pressed his lips against yours. You froze in his embrace. Of all the times you imagined kissing Bucky you never thought it would be with tears covering your face and on the verge of completely breaking down. When you weren’t returning the kiss Bucky reluctantly broke it. He moved away and opened his mouth but you wrapped your arms around him and pulled him back. You felt him smile against your lips and when you broke it gasping for air he rested his forehead against yours.

“You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do that.” He said quietly

“I think I have some idea,” you said, “Forgive me?”

“Yes.”

You relaxed and smiled up at him.

“Good. Now let’s get back to bed.”

“Princess, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

#fanfiction #mcu #fatws #reader insert #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader

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extremelyblackandwhite · 3 years

Text

dress

pairing: sheriff lee bodecker x younger! reader

warnings: cheating, smut, age gap, angst, blackmailing

a/n: the reader is at least 10 years younger than lee. if that upsets you, please don’t read this work. additionally, i based reader’s 60′s style mostly out of that oufit margot robbie wore for once upon a time in hollywood and megan from mad men, you can see my inspiration outfits here [x] [x] hope you enjoy it xx

Inescapable, I'm not even gonna try and if I get burned, at least we were electrified. I'm spilling wine in the bathtub, you kiss my face and we're both drunk. Everyone thinks that they know us, but they know nothing about all of this silence and patience, pining in anticipation, my hands are shaking from holding back from you ...

The rain fell harshly and unkindly on the pavement for the fifth day in a row, the sun having forsaken the forgotten hellish town that was Knockemstiff, Ohio. Few could say the name and ever fewer dared to enter the town. Even God’s afraid of it, his mother would tell him after nursing what felt like another one of her endless bottles of liquor. It was a haunted town, not a lot left and those who did never crossed paths with it again. Murder and crime were all time highs but not even the government dared to come in and try to to anything which meant any police force in the town were like gods, deciding who lived and who didn’t. One of those god-like men was Lee Bodecker, however he preferred you called him Sheriff Lee Bodecker. He was a chubby man in his early thirties, tall but the beer belly made him hunch making him look shorter than he was. He had once been the envy of the town, one of the most handsome men of the town but years of living in Knockemstiff wear down everyone. His own poison had been alcohol which had ended up with him in therapy with his wife and with a therapist who had told him to curb the craving of alcohol with sweets instead. It had little to nothing as he still drank like his life depended on it and tonight was no different from other nights. He took off his hat as he entered the local bar in town, the only bar in town, and everyone looked his way, silence installing the ever noisy bar. He liked it, Lee liked it. He knew he was not the handsome one, in fact his look made him quite funny so he made himself scary. Lee made sure that everyone who looked his way, heard his voice or saw his shadow was afraid of him. It definitely worked as once he sat on the bar stool, there was already a glass with 5 fingers of his favourite drink.

Everything was silence except for the mumbling of men discussing their days until suddenly the mumbling was no longer about the hell that was living in Knockemstiff. He turned around in his chair and understood why the men were suddenly so interested. There she was, dressed in a high neck black shirt which stood over a white skirt. Matching go go boots left her legs bare, something women in Knockemstiff did not do, still stuck in decades of last. She wasn’t from around and everyone knew it merely by the way she dressed but Sheriff Bodecker knew different. Men watched like dogs as she made her way to the bar, to his side.

- Y/N. - he greeted her. - What are you doing here? Trying to disrupt the town?

- My grandmother died.

- I heard. My condolences.

- She left me all of what was hers including the house so I’m here to sell it.

- The one in Brewer Heights? - she nodded. - Tis a nice house, but I don’t think anyone here would have enough to buy it.

- I’ll decide that. - she held the glass the bartender in between her hands, her eyes roaming over to his hands were his wedding ring had started to become tight around his finger. - Still with Jane?

- Why wouldn’t I be? - he cocked an eyebrow at her. - What are you doing here, Y/N?

- I told you, I’m here to sell ...

- No. - he interrupted. - Why are you here, at the bar? What do you want?

- Nothing ... I see you’re not in the mood to help me anyways. - she got up from the stool she had sat on, straightening her skirt as her feet hit the floor. - Good evening, Sheriff Bodecker.

He was sat, watching her leave but also giving an aura to the men who too watched the modern girl exit the building not to get any ideas. Lee knew these men, they were like dogs and once a suitable amount of time passed, he took to returning to his cruiser and follow her. How could he trust this town with her, an outsider? Y/N had been brought up in Knockemstiff, the daughter of store owners who had both been killed in an assault gone wrong. After that, she was ushered to live with her grandmother, the last of socialites in Knockemstiff. Rumours said her grandmother had moved from New York to wed with a penniless man already expecting once she wore her wedding gown. Rumours or not, she still held much more money than anyone in the town together and she wasted not a cent in her granddaughter’s education, moving to a more upscale house in Brewer Heights once she got her under her care. She was always the one with everything and Lee remembered seeing her while still an officer driving around a brand new glossy red car, hair loose through the wind. In all honesty, he thought her never too leave town but as she reached her tender 21st year of life, she left leaving everything behind.

He parked outside her grandmother’s home, stopping just a bit away from it looking at the house that was so eerily sketched in his mind. He leaned against his seat watching Brewer Heights, the place he so wanted to have lived in his youth. Of course he now owned a place there too but it was faint, fickle. If he were to not be sheriff anymore all would shatter. He would do everything he could to keep his position. He deserved it, he deserved it more than any damned soul on this planet. A knock on the glass removed him from his mind state as he looked the way of his window to see her.

- Can I come in? - she asked, eyes lingering on the passenger seat. He stretched over to the side, opening the door for her but not exiting the car. She entered, closing the door as she sat on the seat. - I’ve always hated when you were mad at me.

- I’m not mad.

- You have no reason to be. I know what you’re mad about and it’s your own fault, you know that.

- Is it my fault you left? - his hands tightened against the wheel of his cruiser, anger coursing through his veins. Lee never liked to hear the truth.

- She knew, Lee and she was right ... If anyone knew, if the town knew I would’ve been ruined and I didn’t deserve that. You must understand I didn’t deserve that.

- I didn’t deserve you leaving without saying a fucking thing now did I, darl’?

- You were married. - she almost spat the words in his face. - You are married, Lee. Now you can be mad at me all you want, you can hate me for all I give a damn but I was not gonna destroy myself for your happiness, and I will certainly not allow you to destroy yourself for lust.

- Y/N ...

- I don’t need your help anymore and I would enjoy it if you parked your cruiser away from my house. I wouldn’t want any rumours about your infidelities to resurface. - she exited the car and climbed the small incline of grass up to her home. Lee still remembered seeing her in a little white dresses her grandmother would buy for her, climbing that incline while holding the fabric so it wouldn’t fly up. She seemed to have gotten the hang of it.

Lee had met Y/N when she volunteered at the station back when he was still a patrol officer. She did the duties of every single secretary plus cleaning which was what she had volunteered for. It’ll be good for my university application, she told him when Lee asked what she was doing there. She started at 17 and remained there until she was 18 and ready to leave and become something other than a Knockemstiff resident. However, her mother having sudden heart attack ruined her plans and she decided to stay to take care of her. Lee didn’t see her for two whole years until she was 20 years old and he spotted her at the supermarket getting an earful from Mr. Collins about dropping a bottle of olive oil while trying to reach something from the higher shelf. Lee didn’t like it, he didn’t like Mr. Collins berating her for a simple mistake so he stepped in. He remembered her thanking him before reintroducing herself to him.

He wasn’t one to be swayed by women, he’d married his Jane when he was fresh out of high school and while his relationship was more than stale, he had his mind on work and alcohol. Sure he could’ve divorced, found someone else but he wasn’t the teenager he used to be anymore, he was hardly someone who women would be attracted to besides a single man for a Sheriff? That surely wasn’t gonna happen. Yet, he couldn’t help but be entranced by her, fresh into adulthood with a mind full of ideas about what she wanted to do. He didn’t mean it, he didn’t mean to start a relationship with her, to start an affair yet he couldn’t say he regret it. He didn’t regret the nights where she’d meet him in the woods, covered by a black trench coat. He could still feel his, his hands against her back, feeling the fabric of her undergarments as the windows fogged.

Y/N was upset. Her friends had told her she better not expect the man who she had left without any notice to help her but she was upset. What choice did she have? After her grandmother heard about it, it would’ve taken no time for everyone in town to hear about it and she would’ve been a disgrace and Lee would’ve certain not become Sheriff. Nevertheless she was upset. Instead, she asked an old friend from school, Billy. It was no surprise he was here, nobody left, nobody ever left. She had left but yet here she was once again, 4 years later wondering about an affair which shouldn’t have happened. Her grandmother had berated her for ages “you don’t sleep with a married man” and of course she knew she shouldn’t yet she had. She didn’t know better.

She had boxes and boxes packed with whatever it was left of the house, photo books, clothing, bedding, all of it packed. Once she got to New York she could sort through it but right now all she wanted to was leave. Her friends even offered to come over and do it for her but the damned lawyer said it had to be her. In the morning she waited for Billy in the steps of her home, dressed in one of her old 50′s fashioned white dress, a far cry from the mini skirts she used at home and off he came in the exact same car he had when they were both teens.

- Y/N, look at you. - he walked off the car. - You look gorgeous, darl’.

- Thank you, Billy. - she scratched the back of her head. - Uhm it’s only 5 big boxes. I’ll pay for the gas if you help me take them to post office.

- You’re not keeping the house?

- And live in Knockemstiff? - she rolled her eyes, climbing up the stairs to grab the boxes from the front of the door. The boy helped her pack the car before the two hopped onto the car. - So, how’s the town been?

- Nothing changes. Mr. Collins died, no one was upset about it and that Bodecker guy became Sheriff. - he light up a cigarette as he turned on the engine. - It’s still as boring as its been and people mostly gossip around the same old gossip.

- What’s new in gossip?

- Eleanor still says you and Bodecker were fucking. - he chuckled. - As if ... I mean, look at you, you were prom queen and he’s a fat bastard.

- You should watch your mouth, Billy. He’s the sheriff.

- Because he bought it. - he shrugged. - Dad says he’s pretty much doing everyone’s dirty work. I mean his sister and her husband disappeared and were found dead.

- I don’t really care for that type of gossip. - she leaned against the seat, watching the trees pass by. It wasn’t that she and Billy were good friends but she needed help and she’d rather die than go beg Lee to help her out. She had tried and it’d failed. Besides what was the worse that could happen?

The worse that could happen became very clear as instead of driving into town he took a left into the woods. She rose her head from the seat as all the ways one could reach town rushed through her mind. This definitely wasn’t one of them, it was hard to even get to the town through the woods. She knew that because, well ... it was where she would meet Lee to ensure no one from town found them. The car came to a stop and Billy got off the car. Maybe he just needed to pee or to get some air. She waited til he was on his back to open the car door and start running but he rushed after her, grabbing her arm and throwing her to the ground before standing over her, hands holding her wrists above her head.

- Billy, what are you doing? - stay calm, that was what they always taught her, stay calm.

- Come on, Y/N. They always wanted us to be together in high school, remember?

- I don’t know what you’re talking about. Billy, calm down.

- You fucking calm down. I know you want me too, Y/N. You called me, you need my help, darl’. I can make you feel so damn good ... - his mouth lowered down and she started to trash around, trying to get rid of him.

- Stop, please stop. - she looked up at the sky, the morning sun barely up as she recalled why you don’t come back to Knockemstiff. You don’t get back because you get stuck. As she convinced herself there was nothing the do, a short was heard through the air.

- What the heck are you doing William? - she recognised the voice. She had never been more grateful for that voice. Billy jumped over to his feet.

- Sheriff ... me and Y/N were just having a bit of fun ... You know, you understand, right?

- Y/N ... - he looked her way. - What were you doing?

- It was against my will, Sheriff. - she climbed onto her feet, leaning against a tree at a healthy distance from him.

- Get the fuck out of here. - the young boy in his mid 20′s rushed out like a child afraid of the dark, forgetting his car and everything he had left behind. Y/N watched him running, tripping onto his legs as Lee fired a warning shot in the air. If this was NY, there would be someone here already but this was Knockemstiff and gun shots were as usual as rain during winter.

He smirked, happy to have once again imposed the authority he so much treasured. Lee never liked Billy, he never liked when he’d drive Y/N home from school even when she was volunteering at the police station. That boy was no good news and always looked at her like she was a piece of meat. Lee still remembered the old Sheriff telling her that boy was no good and looking at her now, dressed in one of her white dresses stained in dirty and green grass stains, he guessed he was right.

- Billy, Y/N? Don’t you have other friends?

- Billy’s the only one with a car. - Y/N mumbled as she grabbed his keys from the floor to take her stuff off his car before he could return. - Thank you but I had it under control.

- ‘Course you did. - he put his hands on his waist. - Come on, I’ll drive you to wherever you want to go.

- I don’t want any favours from you, Sheriff Bodecker. - she held her boxes against her chest. Well, if she started now maybe she could be at the post office with all the boxes at nighttime. - That’ll be all.

- Y/N, come on. I’m a public server so let me help you.

- I don’t want your help. - she almost barked at him, taking another box from Billy’s car. Maybe she could drive the car, yet again she knew the captain particularly liked Billy and could fine her if

- Fine, can you tell me what you’re doing at least?

- I’m shipping these boxes to New York. I don’t have time to completely go through them so ...

- Put them in the cruiser. I’ll take them to the post office and take you home.

- I don’t want any favours.

- It’s not for you, it’s for your grandmother. Now get into the car, please. - he opened the door to her.

Y/N huffed. The last thing she needed was a favour from Lee Bodecker yet in all honesty she had no other choice. She packed her boxes into the truck of his cruiser and sat on the passenger seat, arms crossed as he sat in the driver’s seat. Her mind played tricks on her, reminding her of what they used to do in that driver’s seat of his back when she was younger and full of ideas for the future. She shouldn’t have done it and she knew it, Jane Bodecker wasn’t the best woman but she didn’t deserve having her husband sneaking around with a 20 year old despite her herself having had her fair share of affairs. Not that Lee knew and she wasn’t gonna be the one to tell him about the time she was working late in the station and saw his wife getting busy with a new patrol. She didn’t have that right, after all he was doing the same to her. She shouldn’t have done it, nevertheless. Her grandmother died ashamed of her and now she had to deal with it.

- Billy said Sandy died. Is it true?

- Yeah, last year.

- Oh ... I’m sorry, I didn’t know.

- She had it coming. That weird husband of hers ended up driving her off the edge. That Arvin kid shot them yet I can’t say they hadn’t it coming ... She was still my baby sister.

- I’m sorry, Lee. I’m so sorry ... - she looked down at her skirt.

- Almost got me too ... stupid kid. - he shrugged. - Good thing I was fat enough to stop the bullet, I guess.

- Well, I’m sorry about Sandy. - she said as she saw her house become clearer through the window. He stopped in front of her home, unlocking the doors so she could walk out.

Y/N walked out before she could do something stupid. Whatever she did, whatever he had, whenever they were together she always ended up doing something stupid. She sat in the empty house of her childhood, only now containing furniture. She could remember it so well from her years as a child running up and down the stairs, not knowing what awaited her outside the world. Nevertheless, she didn’t want to owe anything to Lee. She knew who he had to answer softly too, she knew those men Billy spoke about. They always ran for Sheriff ever since she was a kid.

She looked at the clock on the wall, 3PM. She knew exactly where those men would be at that time and so she changed and took her way downtown. Everyone turned their head as she walked into the badly light, old bar in tones of musky green which greatly contrasted with her baby blue short dress. The town had gotten stuck in the 40′s and 50′s, women barely showing their legs or any skin and there she was, a woman born and raised in Knockemstiff dressed like a movie star. The table of three men clearly noticed, the under-sheriff, the division chief and the captain. She stood in front of the round table, taking her sunglasses and setting them on top of her head, a nice, covergirl smile on her pink painted lips. You can get the girl out of Knockemstiff but you can’t get Knockemstiff out of the girl.

- Hello boys. You mind if I seat with you? - she put her hand on one of the chairs.

- Hey, you’re Elizabeth’s granddaughter aren’t you? - Frank, the under-sheriff asked, pulling the chair for her. - I thought you were in New York.

- I was but I just came here because of my grandma’s inheritance, but I have something to discuss.

Another night, another day of useless parading around for Lee. He’d pass by the post office and shipped Y/N’s boxes and that had been the highlight of his day. As per usual, he made his way to the bar only to found the environment was slightly different. He knew this town like the back of his hand, anything off always rang alarm bells. As the bartender placed his usual poison in front of him, he decided to get to the bottom of the situation.

- Why’s everything so quiet?

- I don’t know, Sheriff. - the man replied while cleaning glasses. - Elizabeth’s girl was here and I don’t know what she did but Frank, Jonah and Fitzwilliam left as if she were the devil.

Fucking hell. He drowned the last of his drink before grabbing his hat and entering his cruise. Damned Y/N, she used to be such a nice girl before leaving to New York. God, the only complaint he ever got about her was when the mayor complained about her wanting to run a march. He drove to her home like a mad man. What was she doing messing around with those three? He’d seen them do worse things for much less. Lee climbed the grass patch up to her door, knocking on it as if his life depended on it.

- Y/N, open up. Right now. - he thumped the door again. - I’ll break in if you don’t answer it!

- Jesus. - the door opened up to Y/N dressed in what he was almost entirely sure was the shortest dress he had ever seen a woman wear. She stood against the door, hand on the wood while the other on her waist as he entered her home.

- Took you long enough. - he stepped into the home which he had never dared to step in.

- I was upstairs. - she closed the door, locking it behind her for good safety. No one can be trusted in this godforsaken town. - What do you want?

Lee walked further into the house ignoring her question as he shut all the windows of the ground floor, anything that could allow anyone to look inside the house. Last thing he needed was for anyone to see inside the home and start any rumours. Stupid bastards. Y/N followed him around asking the same damn question anytime he shut any window and pulled any drapes down.

- Stop touching my stuff. - she put herself in front of him. - What do you want, Lee?

- What do I want? - he sat against the couch, sighing. - What the fuck did you do, Y/N? Why were you at the bar?

- I didn’t do anything. - she batted her eyes innocently.

- Y/N, I have another election coming up soon. I’ll ask again, what did you do at the bar?

- It’s none of your business.

- Y/N, I’ve seen those men kill for less so you tell me now what you did.

- Stop ordering me around. - she rolled her eyes at him. - I don’t like owing anyone so now we’re even.

- We’re even? - he pitched the skin of his nose. - What the fuck, Y/N?

- You wanna know what I said? Would that make you feel better? Would that make you feel like you rule this damn town, Lee? - she looked down on him, almost teasing him. Had it been a few years ago she would’ve been under him already. - I helped you out.

- Y/N ...

- It’s not just you who was sleeping around with a younger girl. They were sleeping around with friends of mine. The only difference is I have evidence of it ... - she grabbed her purse from the hanger, taking a beige envelope from it and throwing it his way. Lee looked up to her and then to the envelope opening it to see various pictures of girls he knew in compromising positions with his opponents, letters, everything. - They don’t have anything on you because unlike my friends, I don’t keep souvenirs from my affairs.

- You blackmailed them? Are you stupid, Y/N? They are going to kill you.

- Please. - she rolled her eyes at him. - My grandmother owned half this town, if I die everything goes to charity and this town falls apart. Besides, it’s not like I’m planning to stick around for longer.

- So what now? You had fun playing femme fatale? You’re bored, is that it?

- I just won you an election without any competition, Lee. You could be nicer about it.

- I don’t need your help.

- I don’t need your help either. I was just repaying a favour. - she leaned against the wall. - You can go now.

- Did you need to wear that? - he pointed at the dress. - Couldn’t have struck blackmail dressed appropriately?

- Do you not like my dress? - she looked down, hands grabbing the baby blue fabric as she expanded the flowey skirt. - You know, I bought it for you. I was planning on using it for birthday a few years ago but you know ... had to leave earlier.

- You bought that dress for me? - he rose from the couch, walking up to her until he had her caged against the wall.

- I bought it so you could take it off, actually. - Lee must’ve been hallucinating because he swore she was pouting.

She looked up at him with that look she used to give him after a long day at work when he needed something to unwind. Both of them had promised each other not to do anything else when she left, Y/N had told herself no more coming bak and Lee had decided to spend his life content what whatever shred of marriage he had. Yet, she was there in what looked more like lingerie than a dress and he was in uniform, both of them were never good at making good decisions, and this was Knockemstiff. Lee took the first move, leaning down to kiss her like his body dependent on it which in some way he did. She held onto his shoulder, flushing her body against his as his hands started trying to pull the dress away from her body. Baby blue fabric flowed to the ground as he picked her up, throwing her against the couch he had just been sat on. He stopped kissing her to look at her, to look at the body he still dreamed at night or whenever he shut his eyes. She could’ve been gone for 4 years but she sure never left his wildest fantasies.

- Lee, wait. - her hands stopped him from returning to kiss her. - Let me treat you, please.

- Oh sugar, you don’t need to ask. - she got up, walking slowly past him, her matching baby blue undergarments much more racy than what she used to wear back in Knockemstiff. She pushed him against the couch, smirking as she went down on her knees. - What are you doing down there, sugar? It’s more than you can handle.

- Don’t worry, Sheriff. I’m a big girl. - her hands unbuckled the belt off his trousers, throwing it to the floor followed by his trousers. She peppered kisses over his thighs down to his knees and then to the edge of his underwear. Slowly, she peeled them away, making eye contact with him. The silent girl he had known before was definitely long gone and he didn’t know how to feel about it. Before he could make up his mind, she took him entirely inside inside her mouth. - Fuck, you look fucking flawless with my big cock in your mouth, sugar.

She smiled at his praise, moving her head up and down still at a painfully slow pace, his balls in her hands. Lee pushed his head back, groaning at her motions and thinking it could no get better until she started to move her head faster, his tip reaching the back of her throat, but it didn’t seem to bother her. Instead she moaned against him, the vibrations making him feel like he was on cloud 9. Fuck being sheriff, nothing made him quite higher than having the one who got away with his cock down her throat. He started twitching against her mouth, his hand grabbed a handful of her hair, pushing her against his pelvis and starting to control her moves. She kept moaning against him, bringing him over the edge until he just couldn’t hold himself anymore. His grip loosened on her head as his muscles gave up on him.

Y/N got up from her kneeling position, thumb pushing whatever cum had spilled over into her mouth. That image alone made him harden up again like some horny teenage boy. She smiled at him, hands on his shoulders as she sat on his lap.

- What do you want me to do, Sheriff? - she batted her eyes at him, leaning down to kiss his ear lobe lowering down to his neck.

- You wanna ride my cock, sugar? - he hooked his hand on her nape, pushing her so she was looking at him. - You wanna make up to me for leaving me all alone?

- Yes, Sheriff. - she lined up and slowly sunk down on him, both of them moaning.

- Come on, sugar. Show me what you can do. - she started riding him as if the devil had possessed her. He pushed her lips against his, a sloppy messy kiss which definitely was more lust than anything else as she moved up and down against him. - Yeah, you like that don’t you, sugar? Tell me you like it, sugar.

- It feels so good, Lee. - she leaned against him, her hips still moving as he pulled her bra down, pinching her nipple. - Fuck.

- You’re never gonna leave me again. - he started thrusting up, moving her from under him so she was laid across the couch. - Promis ... fuck ... promise me, sugar. Promise, you’re not gonna leave.

- Lee ... - she moaned against the couch’s pillow as he speed up his pace, hands holding her hips and moving them against and away from him.

- You’re not gonna leave. - he groaned, feeling the way her walls milked him with such need. - You’re not gonna leave me, sugar. You’re not, right? You’re gonna stay.

- Lee ... - she cried out before her mouth opened up in a perfect O, her orgasm washing over her. He didn’t take too long to cum, groaning like a wild animal as strings of white painted her walls. He slipped out of her, holding her before turning so she was standing on top of him. - Lee, I can’t stay. You know that, right?

- Why not? Things were good when you were around.

- I left for a reason, Lee. - she got up from him, grabbing her dress and quickly slipping it on. - And that reason still stands.

- Y/N, please listen ...

- When I was 20 and we started this, I truly believed you were going to divorce your wife. You were going to divorce her and you were gonna marry me and ... and my grandma would’ve been upset but she would’ve learned to deal with it and then she would’ve taken me to the altar. I waited a year to see if I would ever become something other than a mistress and then the elections came around and I understood you were not gonna divorce Jane. You were going to be Sheriff and you’re still going to be Sheriff and maybe sometime Mayor. I’m not gonna be your mistress anymore, Lee.

- Y/N ...

- Please, leave. - she wiped whatever tears were threatening to fall off. Lee furrowed his brow, putting on his trousers before trying to approach her but she stopped him, arm raised firmly keeping distance. - Please, leave.

- Y/N, c’mon. Let’s talk.

- LEAVE! - she rose her tone at him. Lee wasn’t going to argue with her, it wasn’t his place to argue with her at her own house and so he left. Y/N stayed in the middle of her leaving room, arms crossed until she broke down crying.

She could almost hear her grandmother’s words “there’s no use crying about it” when she told her Lee was running for Sheriff. Funny how even after being dead, the old nag still was as right as she was four years ago. She wiped her tears with her hand and climbed the stairs up to her bedroom, sitting on the bare bed. It was going to be alright, tomorrow she’d be able to sign the rights over to the letting agency and could return to New York. Things were fine there, or at least she wasn’t sleeping with a married man there.

The sun didn’t raise up that morning, rain instead replaced it and so Y/N remained laid in bed watching the rain drop rush down the fogged up windows until a loud thumping on her door forced her to get up. She wrapped herself in her robe and went down the stairs to open the door.

- Good morning, miss. - she opened the door to her letting agent. - How are you?

- I’m alright, Don. I’m sorry, I thought the open house was later. I’ll just get my stuff and leave.

- No, it’s all right miss. I am just here to tell you that we’ve sold the house was above the price you were asking for.

- Pardon me?

- At least two times the asking price. It was such a good price, he had to take it. Paid upfront.

- What really? Who?

- He should be coming to see the place in an hour. - he said. - We’ll bring you the check later on.

- All right. Thank you Don.

That was good news at least she got to leave Knockemstiff before anything else happened. She didn’t know what had overcome her to decide to have sex with Lee. Pull yourself together Y/N, you’ve had four years to learn how to deal with it. It was fine, it was going to be fine. She packed whatever was left of her stuff into her small patched up luggage and put it by the door. She just needed to wait for Don to bring her check back and she could go on back to New York, where her mistakes only included putting coloured clothes with whites and then having pink clothes for the rest of her life. A knock on the door made that decision come much faster. Okay, Y/N. Get the check and go.

- Lee? - she opened the door to see the least person she wanted to see. - Go away, I’m expecting someone.

- I know. - he walked in as if the house was his. - You’re expecting me.

- This is not funny, Lee. Don should be bringing my check anytime and the owner will be here in an hour.

- Yeah, I’m sorry I’m early.

- Pardon? - she rose her eyebrows at his statement. - What do you mean?

- It’s my house now. I was thinking of upgrading, ya know? This house is the best one in Brewer Heights after all.

- Are you fucking kidding me, Lee?! - she stood in front of him before he could walk further into her home. - You’re bringing your wife into my childhood home? YOU’RE BRINGING YOUR WIFE TO YOUR MISTRESS’S HOME?!

- How many bedrooms is this house? They said they thought it was over five in the contract.

- You have a perfectly good house. Why do you want mine?

- Mine is too small. Only one bedroom, I’d have no place to build a nursery.

- A nursery? You and your wife are having a baby? In my childhood home ... how swell.

- You know I’m thinking about running for mayor. I mean, it’d look good if I had a family.

- Good luck convincing Jane. - she gave him a cynical smile.

- I don’t have to convince Jane. I’d have to convince you.

- Me? Fuck off, Lee. I’m not having a baby for you and your wife. Fuck off.

- We’re a good team, Y/N. Besides, Jane is no longer in the picture.

- Lee ... - she sighed. - Please.

- You see, my wife isn’t as good as me at keeping her infidelities casual. The other candidates have caught wind of it ... I need someone who’s almost as good at blackmail as me.

- I’m better at blackmail than you. - she crossed her arms at him.

- So what do you say, sugar? Want to be the sheriff’s wife?

- Do you promise I’ll get to be the mayor’s wife someday?

- With you on my team, I think you’re gonna be the mayor’s wife sooner than you think.

taglist: @buckysteveloki-me

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kaijurakunsobs · 3 years

Note

hello tis I the America modern society fun times Heisenberg hc anon!! Tangentially to that, imagine this guy’s first time seeing the beach or going inside a goddamn skyscraper.

I think, he would be ok with using lifts and going to a skyscraper, he looks like someone who's used to be in high places

does that means he won't get vertigo if he looks out thru a window? he won't tell you, he won't even admit it that he in fact, feels vertigo

and just imagine him how at peace he would be near the ocean.

ok ok ok listen...listen...

he saw some promo commercial for a new show and immediately asked you if you could take him go a place like that

is the beach, he wants to go to the beach?

he remembers seeing pictures in some old books and small fragments of a place like that when he was asked to repair Moreau's old tv

but it looked so stale and boring and now it's just so...bright and full of life

well...you do have some vacation time you need to use anyway, why not?

one trip to the mall, a lot of fighting over whether Durant goes or not (yes...you end up taking Durant with you), a lot of packing and you two are off in your car

this is also a new experience for him, watching through the window at the many places you pass by, the sideroad attractions, so many places to see

it was a little hard to find a good Airbnb that would let you house your dog too, not too close to the beach and not too far away from everything else

the first day there us just unpacking, let your poor doggo stretch his legs and make sure there's food in the fridge

"ok, I know this might be uncomfortable but if you feel self-conscious about your scars? then you can just keep your tank top up on, and don't try to walk around with no sunscreen on"

he's just there for a bit, sitting under the shade and listening to all the sounds, digging his feet on the sand and processing the warm feeling of the sun, this is different than being in the city, is humid but it doesn't irritate that part of his neck

you can see him petting Durant and you make a mental note of asking his therapist how to register the dog as a therapy animal

some people ask about Durant's prosthetic and you see him proudly explain that he makes them, there's a handful of people that ask for his contact and you are glad to help him with that

when he's finally ready to go in the water, he expects it to be lukewarm but it's cold, a nice change from the weather

once the water it's waist deep he doesn't go any further and just enjoys the way the ocean pulls back the water and the waves that crash against him

that night he sleeps like a log, you can't tell if it was because he ended up chasing Durant around, or how he just allowed the waves to bit him for a long time or it was too much to take

what you can tell is, that he lied when he said that he applied sunscreen on every patch of visible skin, part of his shoulder and arms are sunburned, but that's a problem for tomorrow

#karl heiseberg #karl heisenberg x reader #x reader #resident evil village #re8 #this man deserves a therapy dog #or any kind of therapy animal

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megakimathi · 3 years

Text

Headcanon fanfiction merformer cryptid Rung/reader

CONTINUATION 2 PARTE (2/1).

@auntabysmal

Finally they reached her apartment, where they went into the kitchen and put the bags down. Both flopped down on the chairs, one out of fatigue, the other out of solidarity.

Rung finds himself in someone else's house for the first time. What should he do? Should he retreat to the bathroom to wash his hands so they can talk later?

From the other room, the two human hear joyful yapping and paws pounding on the floor and look at its source. With a contented puffing and a shaking bushy tail they are greeted by a small dog. Holo!Rung identified it as a live loaf of bread with legs. It was a corgi.

The pet rubbed its body against the owner's legs and squinted when it was ironed everywhere. Corgi had already decided to put his front paws on her knees when he saw a stranger in the house and growled in displeasure. Rung himself took this as a sign that the dog did not like his empty shell and he was about to be exposed.

- Bruno! Calm down, this young man helped your Y/N carry the groceries home. After all, you could have been left without a toy.

The girl is laughing, and it seems that Holo!Rung and the dog are looking at her at the same time as she digs in her bag and pulls out something interesting. She holds a squeaky toy in her hand and gives it to her pet. Bruno seemed to like it, but still looked at the man suspiciously. Anyway, the dog was no longer paying attention to people, running away with the toy in his mouth.

The girl gets up and begins to arrange her purchases, pacing around the kitchen, the therapist adjusting his glasses and opening his mouth, as Y/N waves her hand toward the corridor, pointing in the right direction. Was she reading his mind? Or did she take his actions and movements as a sign of embarrassment?

Now, as he made his way to the bathroom and looked around the interior with interest, he wondered if he needed to wash his hands. He washed them when he came to work, because he had to. But when he was visiting? Although...He was picking up purchases off the ground and probably touching anything dirty while he was walking down the street.

Holo!Rung twists his knobs and washes his hands with soap and water, then wipes them on a towel hanging nearby. He didn't pay attention to the soft sound behind him.

- Oh, what a meeting, Eyebrows.

- Rung!!! ....RAVAGE?!...

He corrected the familiar voice on automatic, immediately turning sharply to the source of the sound. In front of him, on the edge of the bathtub, sat a black cat, looking at the man with a squinted gaze. He looked as if he might have laughed a little more.

Holo!Rung came to his senses quickly, taking off and wiping his glasses with the rag he had in his pocket. He looked directly at the cat, who was silent for a few minutes, but later jumped on the closed laundry basket.

- Y/N knows what she has...A talking cat? I don't think people have talking animals.

- Come on, Eyebrows. Of course she doesn't know. I don't want to get a panic attack or a tantrum from her. I'm comfortable pretending to be this animal while my real body is in the Aquatic Habitat Center. Going out and observing people like everyone else in holoforms.

Holo!Rung thought about something, his brows drawn together, and looked past the cat. He was about to say something, but he seemed to lose the thread of his thought, and put his glasses back on.

- The dog reacted negatively to you because a stranger appeared in his territory. I've lived here a long time, he's used to the fact that my appearance is holoform.

Confidingly informs Holo!Ravage, watching with a chuckle as the man in front of him visibly relaxes. Without any warning, the black cat jumps onto his companion's shoulder, the companion lets out a brief imitation of a sigh, and they stare at each other briefly before leaving the bathroom and running into Y/N in the hallway. Seeing her second pet on her guest's shoulder, the girl giggles.

- Ravage! You've come home! Oh Rung, you caught his sympathy quickly, he's usually uncontacting and evades the touch of strangers.

The girl winks at him, holo!Rung looks away. Holo!Ravage jumps off his shoulder and hides in one of the rooms with a short meow.

(The girl's gesture makes the real Rung let out a nervous and embarrassed growl, but he likes it, he realizes that he wants her to repeat it. But he waits.)

Holo!Rung remembers that nibbling his lips and the way a human can move his fingers over his hands signifies nervousness. The girl stands in front of him, smiling sweetly at him, and the man decides to show nervous gestures, along with a confused look.

- So...I hope I'm not distracting you...But if you're done with the packages, may I suggest you take a walk? We can still hang out.

Y/n herself watches the guy, discreetly examining him. Now, he seemed even cuter, the glasses, the tie, and that interesting vest only add to his sexy charm. Biting her lower lip, the girl hums, trying to distract herself from her heated thoughts. She nods at his question.

- We'll take Bruno with us, just time for him to take a walk. The dog won't bother us, will it? Bruno, come here!

She winks again. Holo! Rung nods with a satisfied smile.

(The real Rung can't stand it and lets out a joyful whimper)

The girl hooks the leash to the collar of the approaching pet, and holo!Rung could have sworn as the dog threw a glance at the room where Ravage had gone before. Are these two up to something? To interfere? And does the dog understand the holo!cat?

*****

They went out to the park, where the girl let Bruno go running.

- So...how did you get Ravage? And why does he have that name?

- Mmmm.... I picked him up on the street a long time ago. He looked very dirty and kind of stripped. He ran away from everyone, including me, although I just, in my spare time brought him some food. Perhaps with my patience and kindness I earned his trust, he allowed me to touch him, and at the same time, as if to say that I could take him to my home. And about the name...he was already wearing a collar with a tag and a nickname, probably the owners had thrown him out on the street. I thought the name suited him very well, so I kept it.

Anyway, he seems to be more of a street cat now, he literally visits me, sits in the apartment for a few days, and then back out on the street.

The girl sighs as she talks about her cat. Holo!Rung puts his palm on her shoulder as a sign of sympathy. The thought flashes through mind that Ravage, after the kindness on Y/N's part, decided to "punch her in the tear" and programmed himself a collar, for he would hardly have worn it to begin with. Clever, very clever.

Time was approaching evening, the sun was slowly setting. Y/N and Holo!Rung didn't even notice how long they'd been talking and it was time for them to split up.

They turn back around, the girl hooks the approaching pet on a leash, and all three of them walk to the exit of the park.

- Ah, Mr. psychologist, you were so interesting to talk to.

- You, too, my lady.

The man smiles flirtatiously and adjusts his glasses, the girl giggles aloud, and mentally squeaks at the gesture. Would it be too cheeky to ask to run her palm through his fluffy hair and sideburns?....

Corgi is watching them, and you can tell there is some kind of mathematical calculation going on in his head. The owner liked this man and he helped her bring home a squeaker toy. Plus, Ravage himself pushed the idea.

There's only one thing missing.

Bruno looks at the two people, they are still cooing, and he turns, sensing the other dog. The corgi does not bark so as not to distract, but he tries to draw the other dog's attention to himself, playfully crouching on the ground. The second dog approaches, it is without its owner, and what luck, it has a leash attached to it. They sniff each other, the corgi literally giving the other dog the information she needs. She agrees. The situation is now controlled by these two beautiful dogs.

The girl feels the tension of the long leash and does not pay attention to it at first, fascinated by Rung, and so she does not react in time to the realization of the two dogs' idea.

The two people stood a couple of inches apart, the dogs in turn begin to run and cut circles around them. On purpose, so that the straps would entangle the human bodies. But so far it appeared that they were at the feet and slightly above them.

The dogs cautiously move slightly apart, and Y/N and holo!Rung bump into each other with a rather loud "OH", good it's a good thing they don't bump their face together

Holo!Rung feels the girl's warm breath somewhere at his neck, his glasses slipping to the tip of his nose, and the man looks down to look at the girl and ask about her well-being. But he can't say anything, the words stuck in his throat, he stiffens. They are pressed so close together.

Y/N, already about to apologize and untangle herself from the tangled leashes, raises her head and meets her gaze with the holo!Rung. The girl freezes, her eyes widening in surprise, and she sighs quietly. Now, she looks directly into his face, and if before she did not look into his eyes, her gaze sliding back and forth over his figure and clothes, now she looks straight into them.

She realizes that the man has different color eyes, heterochromia. One eye is blue, the other brown. And they look just beautiful. They're just incredibly mesmerizing.

(The real Rung feels initial terror at the contact, but also awe at the same time. And feels genuine interest from the person. The cryptid doesn't know what to do, he wants for the first time to touch the human, to press his nose against her neck, or to kiss....But he doesn't want to disturb the atmosphere of the moment and scare Y/N. Tail nervously rushes across the floor of the cave, the merformer himself growling. He'll have to get out of this situation somehow).

The holo!Rung face heats up with an imitation blush and the man looks away, the first to break this strange but pleasant hypnosis. The girl makes an indefinite sound, blinks, and turns away as well, with flushed cheeks. Her gaze falls on the two dogs beside her and they immediately try to look guilty. They would love to run away from the human wrath, but they themselves have tied up these people and are literally trapped

The humans cautiously disentangle themselves from the two leashes, and the big dog hides among the trees with a joyful bark. Bruno presses his ears to his head and whines guiltily. If holo!Rung bought the dog's guilty look, the girl only snorted, picking up the leash again. But she looks at the little corgi with an imperceptible smile, tucking her hair behind her ear with excitement.

- If....If you're not repulsed and frightened by this situation....We could meet again....We could take a walk...Should we exchange phone numbers? ....

Holo!Rung didn't look away, mesmerized by the girl who was talking and nodded without hesitation in response. Yes! He will meet her again! Wait. Phone number?!

- Oh...Phone...Sorry I gave my phone away for repair. But I can write down your number and I'll text or call you later!

Good for, you made it. The man takes a crumpled sheet and pencil out of his pocket and the girl writes her number down there, immediately hiding her face. Holo! rung puts the sheet back in his pocket with a smile.

As they leave the park, they say goodbye and go their separate ways. The girl, having moved a decent distance away, makes an inarticulate squeak. Holo!Rung, as usual, rounds a quiet corner. Pulling out a piece of paper and reading the phone number, he memorizes it well, the body's holoprojection dissolves into thin air.

The orange-and-white merformer smiles happily. And at the same time he realizes - he has to buy a cell phone.

#transformers #transformers headcanon #merformers #merformers au #rung x reader

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ricksroaches · 3 years

Text

Jungkook - Dysphoria ch. 1

pairing: Yoongi x Reader, OT7 x Reader (platonic)

summary: Jungkook, a burnt out gifted student, comes home from summer camp not ready to start his sophomore year of highschool, but his friends are there to help him feel better. Although not in the best of ways.

notes: This is a Euphoria-ish au but mostly it's just heavily inspired by the show (I use a few quotes), and each chapter is based on a character. There's a few parts where I cue a song title that's because I made a soundtrack to listen to while reading but I deleted it a while ago so :( if you feel like it listen to the ones I did write down. I'm apologizing now bc my writing can be a bit choppy/rushed its just cuz i have a more drabble-like style and don't know how to write between big scenes. THIS IS A DARK FIC. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. Hope you enjoy and sorry for this big ass paragraph.

word count: 3.9k

warnings: ass-load of angst, mental illness (depression, anxiety, bipolar, OCD, and probably more), drugs (all of them. just all of them), underage drinking, cursing, mentions of self-harm

Next chapter

[Slideshow - Labrinth]

When Jungkook was 5, he wanted to be an astronaut. He wanted to fly into the sky and zip around space exploring things never before seen. His little mind was so strong, wanting to learn anything and everything. When he first learned how to read, he would read every sign he passed in the car and play games with the letters he’d find. It wasn’t long before he was placed in advanced classes with kids he'd never seen before and for the first time in his academic career, he was challenged.

When Jungkook was 10, he wanted to be a doctor. He wanted to wear a white coat and glasses and race around a hospital busy saving lives everyday. He wanted people to look to him for advice and treat him with respect. He wanted to feel needed.

When Jungkook was 14, he wanted to be a paramedic. He didn’t think he’d be smart enough to become a doctor so an EMT would have to do. His classes had begun to pile up in work to the point where he didn’t have the time to think about anything but school. He ate, slept, and breathed homework, projects, and term papers.

When Jungkook was 16, all he wanted to do was graduate. He no longer had any desire to pursue his childhood dreams. When he was asked what he wanted to do when he was older, his mind was a void. He couldn’t see any future for himself past high school. He went day to day not bothering to care about what might happen the next day. He coasted through all of his classes and dropped out of the advanced programs that his parents put him in.

His potential was like a flame. It was small at first, but still had loads of potential, so more kindling was thrown on top. The flame received it well, quickly spreading over the new material. But they kept stacking kindling. Stacking and stacking and stacking putting more and more pressure until finally….the flame died. All because he liked to read.

[Forever - Labrinth]

The clouds inched across the sky and rows of crops and fencing whipped by the car window. A stark contrast between the two. Jungkook rested his head against the glass and watched as the car began to pass more and more houses. The familiar area told him he was almost home. He should’ve been glad, elated even. He would finally get to see his friends again, but after three weeks of summer school to catch up on the class he skipped last year he’d lost the ability to smile or show any form of positivity. To say he felt like a zombie would be an insulting understatement.

The car pulled into the ever so familiar driveway and the rest of his family piled out of the car. He didn’t move. He heaved a long, anguished sigh before snatching his duffel bag from the other seat and throwing open the door.

He was out the front door again before his mom could even ask him where he was going. Speeding his bike down the empty road that he’d ridden countless times before. He could make this route with his eyes closed. The house in question came into view and Jungkook pedaled harder to close the distance. He swung one leg to the opposite pedal and straddled it until he swerved to a stop in the driveway. The house was old, hadn’t been lived in for years, wasn’t on the market, yet wasn’t scheduled to be torn down. It was the perfect place for a group of teenagers to tear apart and put back together. Without knocking, he stepped inside and was hit with the welcoming scent of booze, pizza, and weed with notes of cigarettes and coffee. Music blasting from a distant room in the house led him to the living room where he counted one, two, three, four, five people sprawled about the room. Upon noticing him standing in the doorway, they jumped up and raced to pull him into the room.

“Kook! How you been man? How’d surviving summer school go?” Taehyung was Jungkook’s best friend and unsolicited wingman. He was always trying to set him up with girls so he could get his v card punched. Taehyung was ever the ladies man. Never had trouble finding a date or a hookup. No one could blame him though. If they had that flawless, arrogant face they’d use it too. Despite his fuckboy nature, he was the best friend Jungkook ever had. They’d gone to the same school since they were 7 and Taehyung’s untamable charisma sniffed out Jungkook’s shyness rather quickly. They were inseparable and the rest is history.

“Fine I guess.”

“Kookie, come sit down! I’ve been saving your spot on the couch for you!” Jimin pulled Jungkook to the left corner of the C shaped couch. Jimin was like Taehyung in the sense that he also had no issues with finding partners. He wasn’t near as promiscuous as Taehyung, but he made up for it with his bisexuality. He had an entire other gender to choose from. Jimin was probably the nicest of the group. He always gave the best hugs and was their personal therapist. His aura seemed to coax you into opening up to him even if you hadn’t originally planned on it. He had a way of saying all the right words to make you feel better, even if it was just for a moment. On the other side of him, he was the biggest party animal the group had ever seen. Anywhere else, he was the purest angel that everyone believed could do no wrong. But at a party? Park Jimin was a demon. Seductively dancing in a stylish jacket, pants low enough to show his v-line, sweaty hair flipped back pounding shot after shot until he was the last man standing. That guy could party from sun down to sun up like it was a baby shower.

“Did you at least learn anything you missed last year?” Namjoon. Ever the parent. He was surprisingly humble given his father’s status and money. He easily had the best grades among the friends. School always came easy to him, no matter what it was. However, if you saw him outside of school, you’d never be able to guess he was one of the school’s top students. He carried an energy with him that dared anyone to mess with him or his friends. Although you didn’t see it often, he could make himself scary if he wanted to. All in all, he’s just a gentle giant that made sure everyone turned in their work.

“Absolutely nothing. I don’t know why they keep wasting their time on me.” Jungkook sighed. Hoseok threw a pillow from across the couch, smacking him in the face.

“Yah! Don’t talk about yourself like that!” Hoseok was the human charger. It didn’t matter if someone’s mama died if Hoseok was in the room there would be shenanigans. He was always the one to make some crazy dare that would end up getting them in trouble but they wouldn’t be mad because it was totally worth it. He also had great music taste and almost always was on aux. Hoseok’s vice was coke. Often the driving force behind his hyper nature, it started out as just a thing he did at parties, but slowly creeped into his everyday habits. It hadn’t become a problem yet, he vowed that as soon as he started getting nosebleeds he’d stop, although Jungkook was wary of how difficult that was going to be.

“Where’s Y/N and Yoongi?” Jungkook asked after noticing their usual spots empty.

“They left to get food. They should be coming back soon.” Jin assured him, giving him a comical slap on the thigh. Jin was the eldest, but rarely acted like it. Whenever he wasn’t making stupid dad jokes or eating he spent his time at the classical theater where he worked and sometimes acted. He planned on pursuing acting given his “world wide handsome face.” “It just has to be seen! People around the world need to swoon at my beauty” as he would put it.

No one heard the front door open and shut or noticed Y/N and Yoongi standing in the doorway of the living room.

“Food’s here.” Yoongi finally croaked. Hoseok and Jin yelped and sprung up.

“JESUS! Ever heard of announcing yourselves?! I swear you guys are the exact same person!” Y/N just gave a shrug and plopped onto the large bean bag that she’d claimed.

“Hey, Kooker.” She dragged out.

“Hi Y/N..” His unusual bland reply didn’t go unnoticed by her, but she brushed it off.

“You ready to get shit faced?” A playful grin plastered her otherwise tranquil face. A small smile poked at Jungkooks pursed lips. There was something about her character that always put him in a better mood. She was the one who invited him and Tae into the friend group in the first place, and because of that, he couldn’t be more grateful.

Yoongi tossed him a beer can and his car keys. “Start us off Jungkook.” Yoongi was by far the most terrifying one. It took some time to get to know his true person but there were still times when he still scared the shit out of him. Jungkook remembered when he first met Yoongi. He looked like he’d served time with the seasoned look in his eye that said he’d seen some shit in his day. He hadn’t spoken the entire time the group was talking and Jungkook was beginning to worry that he didn’t like him. It wasn’t til he finally spoke that Jungkook could release the breath he was holding. For someone so stoic and cold looking, he never expected him to have such a low, soft voice. He realized, Yoongi wasn’t scary, he was just quiet like him.

Jungkook took the keys and poked a hole in the bottom of the can. He pressed his lips to it and pulled the tab, sending the amber liquor shooting down his throat. He finished it with ease and crushed the can in his palm while the room cheered and chanted.

The loud music, laughing, and drugs drowned out everything in the outside world. It felt like the world ended and they were the last people left on Earth. Nothing mattered but what was right in front of them. The hours flew by until it came time for everyone to crash. Most of them were still raging drunk or high which only made them fall asleep faster. Jungkook didn’t drink much and he barely smoked. He just couldn’t get in the right headspace to enjoy any of it. So there he was, laying awake among a pile of snoring boys at some ungodly hour of the night. His phone buzzed in his pocket. He fished it out to read the text in his notifications.

[We All Knew - Labrinth]

Y/N💜: come to my office

He shimmied out from under Taehyung and Jimin and tiptoed out of the room. He followed the smell of weed through the house because where there was weed, there was Y/N. He stepped into the backyard and found her leaning against the wall, blunt between her fingers. The tip of the dark stick swelled into a bright orange when she took a drag. Smoke rolling out of her nose, she held it out for him. He hesitated.

“You're upset. Take it.” Which was a dead-on observation for Y/N, who’s not normally revolving in the same direction as planet Earth. He hesitantly took a puff from it before handing it back. She spread her arms lazily and looked at him with a beckoning stare. He sighed and walked right into her arms that wrapped around his back. She was only older than him by a year, but her old soul and almost motherly demeanor made him look up to her like she was his idol. Sometimes, he forgot he was a whole head taller than her. “Welcome home, Kookie.”

Hers was the only welcome he got that day that brought a genuine smile to his face. She had a way of making him feel welcome and wanted even if she was in a bad mood. She broke the embrace and without a word headed to the old couch by the empty swimming pool. He eventually followed her and flopped down next to her. Another gush of smoke entered the chilly air and it was handed back to him. Feeling better, he took a healthy drag and sighed out the smoke as he sunk further into the couch.

“Was it that obvious?”

“Was what obvious?”

“Me being upset.”

“Not really.” She flicked the ash off the tip of the brown stick, her gaze not breaking from its spacey stare.

“Then how’d you know?”

“Pain recognizes pain.” Y/N wasn’t one for her genius epiphanies, given that nine times out of ten on any given day she was stoned out of her mind. She wasn’t dumb, god no. He wouldn’t doubt that she was smarter than him, but she rarely exercised her ability. As great of a gift that her mind was, it was an even worse curse. An inescapable tomb of her worst fears, thoughts, and intentions, with nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. So naturally, she tried anything and everything to silence her mind; alcohol, weed, acid, coke, molly, you name it, she’s done it.

Jungkook wasn’t angry or disappointed by the lengths she went. He knew she was just trying to feel better, and to him, that’s all that mattered. He’d take high Y/N over no Y/N at all.

“Y/N?”

“Yep.” There was a silence while he worked up the nerve to speak.

“How…uh….how long have you felt…the way you feel?” She chuckled and let her head fall back against the couch.

“Well I smoked a blunt with Yoongi in the car this morning and then-”

“No, I mean like…w-without drugs.” Her lazy smile didn’t change, but her eyes unfocused and she grew quiet as if lost in a flashback.

“How long do you think I’ve felt this way?” He didn’t anticipate this question.

“Uh…I don’t know…you hide it really well.”

“I couldn’t tell you when it started. I don’t remember much before 7. I’m told I was a happy kid, but it didn’t feel like it at all. All my life I’ve looked around and seen that everyone was so much happier than me, and I’d ask myself, ‘Why can’t I feel like that?’ It wasn’t until I was older that I learned…I was born to suffer. That’s just my place in the world.”

“When did you finally tell anyone?”

“I didn’t. My parents found my razors.” Jungkook always thought he saw scars on her arms and legs, but her milky skin made it hard to tell. It hurt his heart to know that it was true, and that every one of those once caused her pain. The image of her forearms and thighs slick with her blood brewed tears in his eyes.

“They determined they didn’t have the knowledge to help me, so they asked me to take a tour of this mental hospital and think about their suggestion….” She paused to keep her voice from cracking. “I didn’t make it home that day. Never really forgave them after that.”

There was a long silence after that. Jungkook didn’t say anything. There was nothing to say. Besides, he knew she hated condolences. “What made you start using drugs?” She took a drag of the blunt and thought about it.

“I was 13.” Really? “I found my brothers stash of weed in one of his shoes. I already knew what weed was and what it was used for, so I took about a gram and a rolling paper and taught myself how to roll a joint on my bathroom floor. I was shaking like a dog shitting peach seeds but when that joint hit, I thought…” She tilted her head to peak at him with an epiphanic smile, “This is it…This is the feeling that I’ve been waiting to feel my entire life. I thought I was sure to get caught and sent to juvie, but I wasn’t. The world went on, and I found a way to live. Now could my lifestyle kill me? Will it kill me? Yeah probably I don’t know, but at least I could’ve had a few years where I wasn’t begging the universe to put me out of my misery.” She paused to take another hit. “People often ask me, ‘Y/N why don’t you try therapy? Drugs aren’t the answer.’ Yeah well, drugs work. Therapy’s a guessing game; you never know if it’s gonna actually help or not and end up wasting your time and money. But when I take that hit, that line, that tab, the world starts to slow…and everything goes quiet…and I feel safe. In my own head. And I can see the world in color again.”

Jungkook watched her blissful face while she was lost in thought. She must’ve been pretty high because this is the most personal she’d ever gotten with him or possibly anyone that wasn’t Yoongi. “Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“W-what if I don’t feel what everyone else feels either..?” He pinched the skin between his fingers to keep his tears at bay, a nervous habit he’d picked up from her. She reached over and took his hand in hers, the webbing between her fingers had white and pink stripes from years of fingernails digging into the flesh.

“Jungkook,” she didn’t use his nickname, “I know how hard it was for you to say that. I want you to know how much I appreciate you telling me, because if anyone knows how you feel, it’s me. You can talk to me whenever, wherever. Even when you think it’s a bad time it’s not, because nothing in that moment is more important to me than you. I don’t want you to go through the same thing I did, so please, even if you don’t want to talk, maybe I can at least keep you company.”

For the rest of the night, Jungkook told her everything. About the pressure, the stress, the desire to collapse and let the world go on without him, his inability to see a future where he was fulfilled. The words often caught in his throat, having never said them out loud before. Y/N didn’t say much, she just wrapped them in a blanket and stroked his hair while she just let him talk. Sometimes, he’d have to stop to cry and she’d hold him a little tighter, wipe his tears away with her thumbs, and wait til he was ready again.

Eventually, he had nothing else to say, his tears dried, and his body stilled.

Babies didn’t sleep that good.

Y/N nodded off a little later but was woken up by a raccoon tipping a trash can. She rested her cheek on his head and tried to go back to sleep, but it never came. She just continued to rest her eyes while playing with Jungkook’s hair and tracing lines along his features.

She didn’t know how long she laid there but soon the birds began their routine morning songs and she was sure she wouldn’t get back to sleep now. The faint tap of shoes on the concrete perked her ears, but she kept her eyes closed. The footsteps stopped behind the couch where she sat. It was quiet before the person chuckled quietly. A warm hand smoothed back the hair in her face and a little kiss was planted on her forehead. She couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face.

“Yoongi, I’m awake you creep.” She cracked her eyes open to see her boyfriend laid over the back of the couch hovering above her, his dark hair tickling her nose. He smirked.

“Well in that case,” he grabbed her chin and tilted her head up before capturing her lips in a playful kiss. When they parted, he glanced down at Jungkooks still sleeping figure. “You guys stay out here all night?”

“Yeah,” she looked down at him and smoothed his hair back, “he just had a few things to get off his chest.” Yoongi almost asked what it was about but her face gave him an idea.

“It’s cold, you want me to take him inside?”

“It won’t wake him up will it?”

“If he’s as out as as he looks, he won’t.” She nodded and Yoongi circled around and slipped his hands under the sleeping boy’s body. Much to Y/N’s pleasant surprise, he lifted him bridal style with ease and she followed him into the house where he placed him next to the other slumbering boys.

When he straightened back up he saw her in the sliding glass door, gazing at the now dusty blue sky. She could feel his body heat on her back against the nippy outside air.

“I always loved the time just before dawn.”

“Why is that?” He wrapped his arms around her waist and pressed his cheek to hers.

“It’s so calm and peaceful. And incredibly quiet besides the birds. It’s the only time I feel truly left alone.”

“You want me to show you my favorite time of day?” She turned to him with a curious look. “Follow me.” Not long after, the two were perched on the flat portion of the roof with Yoongi’s bong sitting between them. His angular fingers effortlessly packed the bowl and held it out to her. “All yours.” She took it with a smile.

“What a gentleman~”

Soon, the sky went from a pale blue to pastel shades of orange and pink. He looked over to see her fiddling with a thread on his hoodie she was wearing. “This,” he took her jaw and guided her eyes up for her to see the sunrise, “is my favorite time of day.”

“Why?”

“It gives me hope. Kinda like you.” He was glad she didn’t say anything. She was lost in the color palette of the scene before her, the weed making everything so much more vibrant and striking. He could see the sky reflected in her eyes, making the view ten times better. More time went by and she rested her head on his broad shoulder while they watched the rest of the sunrise.

Back on the ground, Yoongi cleared the bowl and poured out the bong water before setting it on a table by the couch. Y/N was on her back in the center of the empty pool, slowly tearing a leaf above her face and analyzing how it separated cell by cell. He stood on the edge above and watched her do this another four times much to his amusement. “You wanna get breakfast?”

She was out of the pool and in his face before he could finish his sentence. “Like you have to ask.” He chuckled and rolled his eyes before turning and walking to his car. “Hey, Yoongi.”

He turned back.

“Carry me to the car like Jungkook.” He broke into a smirk and walked back to her.

“Yes ma’am.” She let out a yelp when he scooped her off her feet and marched the two of them to his car waiting on the street.

Cover photo: @BIGHITTED on Twitter

#bts #bts fanfic #bts x reader #fanfic #yoongi #yoongi x reader #ot7 x reader #bts fic #yoongi fic #bts angst

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whereisten · 4 years

Text

I Think We’re Alone Now

A Jaemin fic that’s part of our Halloween Series!

Summary: Your Spring Break plans change at the last minute when the campus heartthrob asks you to join him and the popular kids to your nemesis’ cabin.

Pairing: college student! Jaemin x female reader

Genre: romance, angst, mystery, suspense, horror, crime

Word Count: 7.4k

Warnings: Bullying, body image mention, gore, violence, death

(A/N): SHOUTOUT TO MY GIRL KRYS FOR THIS DELICIOUS MOODBOARD. SHE IS AN AMAZING ARTISTE. I AM IN AWE. I hope my story does this moodboard justice and I hope you guys enjoy! Thank you for the support!

___

Spring Break was imminent for the kids of Guang University. It was your freshman year and your friends all had different plans. You planned to stay home and get a head start on your homework and catch up on all of your favorite Korean dramas.

You headed out of the school with Haechan, your best friend. He had plans to go visit his family in South Korea for a couple of days. You were bummed that your closest friend wouldn’t be in town for the break.

“You sure you don’t want to come to Seoul with me? We might bump into Ji Chang Wook. You never know.” Ji Chang Wook was your celebrity crush.

You balanced your giant biology textbook while you tried to find your phone. “That’s tempting but I have a big exam right after break and I’ve been behind for weeks...So now I have to cram.”

Haechan sighed. “Y/n, you need to give yourself some down time.”

You frowned. “What are you talking about?”

Haechan sighed. “You haven’t come out to any parties in the past two months.”

You sighed. “Well...”

Haechan whined. “You’re supposed to be my party buddy...”

“Well, party buddy, then explain Daniela, Hazel, and Ally,” you said, calling out your best friend for not being so lonely at these parties after all.

“I-“ Haechan started.

Before Haechan could explain, a group of girls you’d tried so hard to avoid walked by and “accidentally” bumped into you, making you drop your book to the ground.

The girl who bumped into you turned and laughed. “I’m SO sorry. Maybe if you didn’t take up so much space, it wouldn’t have happened.”

The other girls laughed as they began to saunter off.

You groaned. You thought bullies retired once they graduated from high school when reality finally gave them a slap to the face.

Well, unfortunately for you, the mean girls from your old high school were smart enough to get into your dream school so you now occasionally saw them. And worse, shared a biology lab with them. The head of the pack, Heather, always had it out for you for always beating her for the best grade in class. You’d get a 94 and she’d get a 93. You were just happy to get an A and she was furious she wasn’t number 1. You guessed it had to do with her superiority complex and how she had to please her wealthy parents.

Haechan yelled, “Heather, what the hell-“

Heather started, “What? It’s a simple observation.”

Well, not everyone could be a size 0 like Heather. You knew that you had a healthy body shape. Sure, you know you could use improvements but you were human. No one was perfect. Nothing Heather could say could make you think she was right. She was just a hater.

“Have a nice break, Heather. Maybe your dad will finally come home,” you said as you grabbed Haechan’s hand and walked off.

“Hey! y/n, get back here!” Heather demanded. Her dad and her mom were separated for a while now and he was never home to spend time with his precious daughter.

Heather’s bark had always been bigger than her bite. So you didn’t let her words get to you. Not anymore.

___

Haechan went home while you waited to call an Uber to take you to the record store across town. You may as well go out and do one fun thing before you hunkered down at home for the break.

That was when you heard someone sobbing hard. And you couldn’t help but find the source.

The boy sat down on a bench by the bus stop. It was the campus heartthrob, Na Jaemin. You’d shared a couple of lectures with him this year. He was very sweet, always had something to compliment you on. Your hair, your lipstick, your outfit.

Well, then he would proceed to ask for help with assignments but you appreciated getting paid with flattery.

You frowned. “A-are you okay?” You started. “Do you need help?”

Jaemin looked up as tears ran down his beautifully sculpted face. His eyes widened at the sight of you. He wiped his tears away with his jacket sleeve. He shook his head. “Y/n! Hey, I’m…okay…I just-“

You sat down beside him and pulled an unopened bottle of water out of your backpack. You handed it to him. “Here.”

He looked down at it and asked, “Are you sure?”

You nodded. “Go ahead.”

“Thank you,” he said, managing a half-smile.

He drank from it as you waited.

He exhaled in satisfaction. “Thank you, y/n. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you like this. School and work have been so stressful…I just needed to let it all out.”

You hesitated before you put a hand on his back. You moved it gently against his muscular upper back. “I’m sorry…Do you…wanna talk about it?”

Jaemin froze and debated telling you. “I got fired from my job…” He admitted.

You removed your hand from his back. “Jaemin, that’s terrible…I’m so sorry…What happened?”

He shook his head. “The boss was kinda harsh. I couldn’t take it. I slipped up once and I got the ax.”

You tried to meet his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Jaemin.”

Jaemin managed a smile for you. “Thank you, y/n. You’re always sweet. Always good. I’m glad you’re here with me.” He placed a hand over yours.

This may or may not have made you want to scream with excitement. But your better judgment told you to contain yourself because Jaemin was upset.

Your little moment was interrupted by Heather and her cohorts.

Heather stood in front of Jaemin, noticing his red eyes “Oh, Nana, what’s wrong?”

Jaemin didn’t look all that thrilled to see Heather either. “It’s nothing…Don’t worry about it.”

“Because if y/n is bothering you, she should leave. Isn’t that right, y/n?” Heather turned to you with her hands on her hips.

You were about to snap when Jaemin beat you to it. “Actually, Heather, she’s not. So what can I do for you so you can leave faster?”

Heather looked at her group in shock. Her minions all let out audible gasps and whispers. “Jaemin...”

“I’m waiting,” Jaemin said, a new commanding tone overtaking him.

“We wanted to know if you’re coming to my cabin this weekend.” She tried to come off flirtatious but after his rebuff, she was confused.

“Maybe,” Jaemin replied, “If y/n comes.”

“What?” You and Heather exclaimed.

“I’ll go if y/n goes,” Jaemin said resolutely.

You started, “Jaemin, I-”

Jaemin interrupted. “I need this, y/n. A time to get away. And if you come, I would love it…” He said softly, almost intimately…Like no one else was around.

You’d had a crush on Jaemin since the first day of Intro to Theater. Jaemin was a tremendous actor. He was an excellent Demetrius to your Helena in your act for A Midsummer Night’s Dream.

Jaemin was always so nice. You thought the most he would do for you is give you a dollar for the vending machine. And that would’ve made your heart soar to the moon.

It was odd that you were considering going somewhere to hang out with Heather and her friends...But you did want to get to know Jaemin more.

What about your homework?

Well, it could wait.

And what about Heather?

Well, pissing off Heather was a hobby of yours.

One of Heather’s friends coughed. And Heather rolled her eyes. “Fine. Meet at my house at 7 AM tomorrow.”

___

Your older sister Sophie drove you to Heather’s. “Why are you going to Lucifer's spawn’s cabin?”

You sighed. “Because a cute boy asked me to.”

Sophie put the car in park right in front of Heather’s mansion. She looked at you in disbelief and fascination. “A boy?”

You said, “He wanted me to come.”

Sophie laughed. “Well, y/n, he must be very cute if you’re willing to hang out with Her Royal Darkness.”

“Like her ego, I’m sure the cabin is big enough so I don’t have to see her.”

You were both so distracted that you didn’t notice Jaemin knock on your passenger side window. He smiled brightly. Wow, he looked incredible for someone who woke up and texted you good morning at 5:30 AM.

“Wow,” your sister said, in shock from Jaemin’s beauty. She rolled down your window.

“Ready to go, y/n?” Jaemin asked. You saw the expectant look in his eyes. He was radiant and much more relaxed. You were so happy to see him. He seemed to feel a lot better.

“Jaemin, this is my older sister, Sophie,” you said, “Sophie, this is my friend Jaemin.”

They shook hands and Sophie muttered, “You better tell me everything when you get back. And that I am the maid of honor at your wedding.”

“Bye, Sophie! We’ll go on our run together when I come back on Sunday, okay?” You said louder to deflect from what Jaemin could’ve overheard. You and Sophie ran together every weekend for stress relief and bonding time. You got out of the car and hoped Jaemin hadn’t heard anything.

Jaemin offered to give you a ride on his Jeep Explorer to Heather’s cabin, much to Heather’s disappointment. Heather’s friends were riding with her.

You and Jaemin had fun on the road for two hours, just the two of you. You enjoyed some old school Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC, and Britney Spears. You snagged the CDs from your sister’s collection.

“Every little thing I do never seems enough for you!” You and Jaemin sang.

You too had gotten off the route to get snacks at a convenience store and because Jaemin needed to fill up his tank. He insisted you put your wallet away. He bought all of your favorite junk food essentials: M&Ms, Flamin’ Hot Cheetos, Coke, Orange Fanta. This boy knew his way into your heart.

“So, y/n, what’s your end goal in life?” He asked as he continued the route to Heather’s cabin. “You strike me as an aspiring pediatrician...Saving the children!”

You laughed at his enthusiasm. “I’d like to be a physical therapist. My parents got into a car accident when I was nine...My mom was fine but my dad broke his right leg and right arm. He needed to get physical therapy in order to walk properly again...I went with him to almost all of his appointments. I have a lot of respect for physical therapists after how much they helped him…”

“I’m glad your dad recovered,” Jaemin said as he gave you a quick smile before gluing his eyes back onto the road.

“Me, too...But...my end goal in life? Honestly, I just want my own space to dance around in...With no shame.”

Jaemin chuckled. “No shame, huh? Does that mean you’re a terrible dancer?”

You smacked him. “No. Well, I’m sure there are worse dancers.”

He laughed harder. “Okay...I believe you.”

You laughed. “What about you, Jaemin? What’s your end goal?”

He sighed. “Start up my own content-creating company...I’m into traveling and uncovering hidden gems. Be the next big thing after Buzzfeed Unsolved.”

“Those are some pretty big shoes to fill…” You started.

Jaemin sounded unsure. “Yeah…”

You smiled, “I know you can do it. You’ve got a subscriber in me.”

Jaemin faked a tear. “You have no idea how much that means to me.”

You both laughed again as you reached for the M&Ms and your hands touched. You quickly pulled away, embarrassed. But Jaemin smiled to himself.

Jaemin said, “But as cheesy as it sounds...I want to get married, get a big house, and fill it with twelve children.”

You coughed. “Twelve? Are you and your future wife thinking of splitting the pregnancies up?”

Jaemin laughed. “Okay, maybe not twelve...But a family of my own is my dream. My parents split up when I was five so...I’ve split my time between two homes and it was an awkward feeling, especially after both of my parents remarried.”

“Oh…” You said. You couldn’t exactly sympathize with him because your parents were happily married so you didn’t want to say anything that could rub him the wrong way. That was the last thing you wanted.

“I want to be with that one person...For the rest of my life...When I meet her, I’ll know.” He said, giving you a meaningful look.

You had no idea how to process that so you took a sip of your blue raspberry ICEE and held it in the air, awkwardly. “Here’s to you finding your soulmate someday.”

He chuckled. “Thank you.”

___

You arrived at Heather’s summer home...Well, she called it a cabin. But it was actually a mansion by the beach. It was gorgeous. Something straight out of a movie. It looked like it could be its own hotel resort. You realized that there was a good chance you’d have your own room.

“This house is huge!” You exclaimed.

Jaemin looked along with you as he handed you your bag. “What a shame. I was hoping we would room together.” He said softly into your ear.

You turned to him in shock and he shot you his infamous flirty grin. This boy had you thinking he liked you and he’d better stop before you tried to kiss him.

Heather handed everyone keys to their bedrooms. “If any of you lose this copy, I can’t help you.” She made sure to say that as she handed you your keys.

You went up the stairs of the beach house and chose the last room on the left. You were unlocking the door to your room when someone from behind you tapped you on the shoulder.

“Hey, you’re y/n, right?” You recognized Yangyang from your mandatory PE class. You both took Intermediate Swimming, a class where as long as you flailed in the water and passed the easy quizzes, you’d be guaranteed an A.

You nodded. “And you’re…”

He said, “I’m Yangyang. It’s so nice to see you here!”

“You, too,” you said, averting your eyes once again. Yangyang was pretty attractive and you hoped he didn’t remember you and your Sailor Moon one piece. You always tried to be one of the first in the water and the last to leave when it came to your swimming class.

Even though Heather’s comments were nothing to you, it didn’t mean you were completely immune to the hurt it caused.

“You were in Coach Emerson’s swim class, right? You had the iconic Sailor Moon swimsuit.”

And there went the rest of your hopes and dreams. “Y-yeah…”

He laughed. “Don’t be embarrassed. I had Dragon Ball Z swim trunks.”

“Really?” You said.

Yangyang pretended to be hurt and winced. “I thought you’d be the one to notice.”

“Well...I’m not exactly looking at anyone’s...body…” You said, cringing at your words.

He laughed. “Fair point. I just liked the pattern. Your favorite character is Sailor Mars, right?”

You nodded, “Hell yeah. She’s the best.”

“I’m more of a Sailor Venus guy, myself,” he replied.

“Good taste. But all of the Sailor Scouts are queens,” you started.

“No question,” Yangyang said. “Hey, do you-” His phone started to ring. “Sorry, y/n...I gotta take this.”

You waved goodbye to him and entered your spacious bedroom. As much as Heather despised you and you despised her, her family had excellent taste in real estate. The queen-sized bed was plush like a cloud straight from heaven. You pulled the window up to feel the ocean breeze. It was paradise.

You heard a knock at your door an hour later. It was Jaemin.

“Wanna go for a walk?” He asked.

“Sure!” You said, having already changed into a sundress.

Jaemin thought you looked stunning. Well, you always did. He was so happy to be here with you. Otherwise, he may not have gone on this trip.

Jaemin led you to the beach where you let your toes touch the water. He teased you by splashing you. And you splashed him back until you both were soaked.

You both laughed so hard that you toppled over each other, you on top of Jaemin. You both stared at each other for a long time. Jaemin closed his eyes, his long eyelashes caressing his cheeks. He waited for you to kiss him.

You moved closer and your lips met his. His lips tasted salty thanks to you and your merciless splashing. But the kiss was everything. It was fireworks at the end of a perfect night. It was hot chocolate on a warm winter night. It was like an angel held you and you snuggled against his wings. The kiss was perfect.

You two let go and Jaemin bit his lip. “So.”

You stood there, frozen. “So…”

“So...we did that.”

You nodded. “Indeed we did.”

“Thoughts?” He looked at you with his big brown eyes.

You cleared your throat. “Well...I certainly wouldn’t mind doing that again.”

Jaemin’s big gorgeous goofy smile came back full force at hearing you. He cupped your face in his hands and was about to kiss you again.

“Guys!” Naeun called out to you. “Have you seen Yangyang?”

You and Jaemin pulled yourselves apart. You answered, “Last time I saw him was when he went to his room. Is everything okay?”

“He wasn’t answering his phone...And I found it in his room.” She held up his phone that had a Dragon Ball Z pop socket on the back of it.

You frowned. “That’s weird.”

Jaemin offered. “Maybe he went for a walk. Got some fresh air?”

“Maybe…” Naeun thought and you nodded. “If you see him, tell him I’m looking for him and that I’m pissed.”

“Okay,” you said.

Naeun stomped away, frustrated.

“Now where were-” you started.

Jaemin already pulled you in for another kiss. He pinned you down against the shoreline and trailed your neck with his kisses.

You breathed heavily as you held him tightly.

He looked at you, as if asking you something.

You gave him a look. “What’s up?”

“Do you want to…” His eyes moved down to his pelvic region where his member was protruding through the fabric of his trunks.

Your eyes widened at how big he was. And your eyes nearly popped out of your head when you realized what he was asking. “Oh…”

Jaemin waited for you patiently.

Things were moving too fast. You were more than happy to kiss Jaemin all night but you really weren’t ready to have sex. Not tonight, anyway.

You already knew the answer. “I’m sorry Jaemin. I do like you but...I’m...not ready. I should go…” You got up but Jaemin stopped you. It was like a romantic Korean drama scene, except instead of your wrist ...He grabbed your ankle.

“It’s okay...You don’t have to go. Please don’t go…” He begged as he made a puppy dog pout.

You laughed, relieved. “Okay okay...You can stop making that face.”

Jaemin pouted his lips even more. “What face?”

You rolled your eyes and splashed him. You and Jaemin spent a couple of hours on the beach, kissing and talking. You wrapped up and he walked you to your bedroom.

___

You woke up early the next morning to hear screaming and crying. You got out of bed and ran out the door.

“What’s wrong?” You asked, finding Naeun devastated on the floor. Heather sat down with her on the ground and consoled her.

“Yangyang…” She said between sobs. “He’s gone!”

Renjun looked grave as he handed you his phone. “We all got these messages. Did you, y/n?”

You looked at what was on Renjun’s phone screen and there was a video of Yangyang, bound up and gagged. Tears streamed down his eyes. He mumbled loudly for help.

Tears fell out of your eyes. “What the hell is this?”

You couldn’t believe it. You’d just had a whole conversation with him yesterday. He was friendly and funny…

And now he was like this.

Jaemin replied, “Someone’s idea of a sick joke...I don’t recommend looking at the rest of the story, y/n…”

You ignored him and kept watching. The next video pointed to a wall and you could hear Yangyang clearly now...He was yelling. “No! Who are you? Why are you doing this? Stop! Nooooooo!” The video cut off after that. The last picture was of Yangyang with his throat slit with text that read: “Wonder who will be next...It’s anyone’s guess, really. 🧐 #springbreak2020”

You ran into the bathroom and threw up. The rest of the group followed you into the bathroom. “Well, y/n?” Tzuyu started.

“Well, what?” You asked.

“Show us your phone,” Tzuyu demanded.

“Why?” You asked.

Jaemin intervened, “Why are you guys ganging up on her?”

“We’ve checked everyone’s phones...Now we want to see y/n’s,” Tzuyu said, a vindictive look in her eyes.

“Fine,” you said. You pulled it out of your pocket and you were shocked to find the messages on your phone.

“Someone sent them to her, too. She’s as innocent as the rest of us,” Renjun said.

Tzuyu frowned. “Okay…”

She seemed disappointed that you weren’t the culprit. You wondered why Tzuyu hated you. She was merely one of Heather’s followers so you guessed she would hate anyone Heather hated no matter what.

Still, this didn’t alleviate any of your worries. Someone kidnapped and murdered Yangyang overnight. And whoever that was remained close by.

And they weren’t finished.

Unfortunately for all of you, your cell reception was weak so you couldn’t contact the police. You were on the verge of a panic attack.

Renjun decided, “We should try going to the next town to get reception.”

Tzuyu started, “You are not leaving me here.”

“Fine, we’ll go together.” He said as they both walked off and borrowed Heather’s car.

___

You sat in the living room, scared to be in your room all alone. Hell, you didn’t mind being with Heather and Naeun. Jaemin was making lunch in the kitchen for you guys.

It had been a few hours since Renjun and Tzuyu left. Now you were all getting worried. The next town wasn’t that far off, according to Heather. So something was up.

And you wondered if it had been a good idea for them to leave. Maybe they had been just as much in danger as the rest of you. Whoever the killer was...He had resources to be anywhere at any time. It gave you shivers.

“Y/n, can you get Naeun a glass of water?” Heather asked you.

You nodded and met Jaemin in the kitchen. You asked him once again, “Are you sure I can’t help with anything?”

Jaemin shook his head. “I’ve got this.” He said as he finished making lasagna.

You got a glass of water for Naeun. “Jaemin, I’m scared,” you said.

Jaemin looked rattled up, too, but he seemed to be holding it together for the rest of you. And it meant a lot to you.

The four of you sat down to eat quietly. Naeun barely took a bite of her lasagna.

Not too long after, she started wheezing. Hives broke out onto her skin. “Epi...Pen...Heather.”

Heather jumped out of her seat. “I’ll go get it!”

“Oh God,” you panicked. “You need air! Let’s go outside, Naeun.”

You and Jaemin helped her out to the front door so she can breathe better. You were praying Heather found her EpiPen soon.

Heather returned, upset, “Are you sure it’s in your purse? I couldn’t find it.”

Naeun nodded. “Yes…”

When you realized Naeun’s EpiPen was missing, you ran up to your room and grabbed yours. “I brought mine!”

“Hurry up!” Heather said.

You ran back down and Naeun was able to get the injection she needed to recover from her reaction.

Heather took Naeun up to her room to recover.

“I wonder what Naeun was allergic to…” You said to Jaemin.

Jaemin frowned. “I don’t know...I had no idea she had severe allergies. Maybe it was in one of the ingredients but I’m not sure which one…God, I feel terrible.” He put his face in his hands.

“Hey, it’s okay...It was an accident...She’ll be okay,” you said as you hugged him.

“It was a good thing you had your EpiPen, y/n...You’re amazing…”

“Or I just have severe allergies, too,” you said.

He laughed awkwardly. “Right…”

Even more hours passed. Renjun and Tzuyu haven’t returned. Everyone was antsy.

You and Jaemin were going to go out and look for them but you were shocked to find his tires had been slit recently.

This wasn’t a coincidence. The killer was watching your every move. You wondered if he had gotten to Renjun and Tzuyu. Your throat dried up at just thinking that.

You and Heather grabbed weapons from her father’s shed, which included gardening shears and hunting rifles.

Heather taught you how to handle the rifle. You both went back into the house with your weapons in tow. You all made sure to shut all of the windows and close all of the doors. You scoured the entire property. No one can come in. And no could come out. You hoped there wasn’t some random secret entrance to this house that rich people always seemed to have in the movies. You all reluctantly headed to bed.

You sat up on the edge of your bed. You were comfortable in a concert tee and some shorts. You wanted to wear something that would be easy to run in. Just in case the killer would come for you next.

Jaemin was at your door. “Hey…Heather and Naeun both fell asleep.”

“How can they be asleep...I can’t sleep knowing that that bastard is out there…” You said.

Jaemin walked into the room. “Can I sit with you?”

You nodded. “Jaemin, what are we going to do...We can’t just stay here. We're sitting ducks. Renjun and Tzuyu are just gone...And we don’t know when or even if they're coming back…”

Jaemin rubbed your back in small circles. His touch was distracting. Kissing Jaemin would be a great distraction.

Making love to him would be even better.

That would be ridiculous. The last thing you wanted to do was have sex when a murderer was afoot. That would be a total cliche.

Jaemin replied. “I’m sorry, y/n...I think our best bet is to wait it out until morning and go to the next town on foot.”

You nodded. “Yeah...Maybe daytime will be safer.”

Jaemin nodded. “Why don’t you go to sleep and I’ll take the first shift?”

“Really?” You asked.

“Yeah, I’m wired. I had three cups of coffee in the past hour. You need to rest, y/n.” Jaemin said as he pulled the covers over you. “I’ll come back to wake you. I’ll be on guard.” He grabbed one of the hunting rifles he left outside the door.

“Thank you,” you said as you shut your eyes. Sleep quickly took over.

___

You were quickly shaken awake. “Y/n get the fuck up!” Heather hissed.

“Heather?” You exclaimed.

She shushed you. “Shut up. You need to come with me right now.”

“What’s wrong?” You whispered.

Heather made sure your door was locked before she returned back to you. “Naeun is dead.”

You looked carefully at Heather and had seen that she’d been crying. “What?” You asked. “That’s impossible.”

“We shouldn’t have left her alone. She said she was fine. She seemed fine. I went to check on her and...she wasn’t breathing. And...I think she was smothered, y/n.”

“Wait...Are you saying…”

“The killer is Jaemin,” Heather said.

“What? Why would you say that?” You shook your head.

“Think about it, y/n. None of us has good reception here so how is that we got those texts about Yangyang? The killer had to be in close proximity to us. Tzuyu and Renjun left in my car, which he probably messed with so they got into an accident...And...I don’t even want to say what could’ve happened...Whatever Jaemin put in the lasagna almost killed Naeun. Then, her EpiPen fucking disappeared. And then, conveniently right after, his tires were slit. And now, since he couldn’t finish the job the first time, he smothered Naeun to death.”

“Heather...Jaemin wouldn’t…” You started.

“I know...I had my doubts, too, but...he gave me some calming tea before I went to sleep...When it cooled down, I tested it...It’s been drugged.”

Your heart sank. “How do you know?”

“My dad’s company is working with the nail polish that can track date rape drugs. My painted nail changed color when I tested it out. Jaemin tried to drug me, y/n…” She showed you her neon green polish and the one fingernail that turned black.

You covered your hand over your mouth.

“I had a feeling he would come check up on me so I tossed some of the tea down the drain and pretended I was asleep. He came back to check that I was asleep, y/n...That’s just creepy. Why the hell would he need to drug me?”

Not knowing how to answer, you started, “Heather...Maybe…”

Jaemin surprised you both by breaking the wood of the door down with an ax. He made a big enough hole to unlock the door from the inside.

You and Heather yelled. Jaemin heard everything.

Jaemin started. “Heather, why are you up? I thought I was going to take care of you tomorrow in my grand finale…”

“Shit,” Heather said as she got closer to you.

“Jaemin? What grand finale?” You demanded. “What is going on?”

Jaemin smiled wide at you. “Sweetheart, I thought I told you to sleep.”

The look in Jaemin’s eyes became cold...Calculating.

“y/n...It’s no accident that I asked for you to come on this trip…” Jaemin said as he pulled a knife out of his pocket and twirled it around his hand. “I thought you’d partake in the festivities…”

“What festivities?” Heather demanded. “Why the fuck did you try to drug me? Why did you kill Naeun? What the hell did she do to you?”

Jaemin tsked as he met Heather’s eyes. “Why wouldn’t I kill Naeun? Why wouldn’t I kill them all? Think about it, you ungrateful little brat.”

You found yourself moving closer to Heather then for she was your only living ally. Albeit the biggest bitch in the land.

Jaemin killed everyone.

Jaemin was the killer.

Heather shook her head. “Jaemin, stay the fuck away from us. I swear to God. Or I’ll-”

Jaemin chuckled. “You’ll what? Call Daddy? Call Mommy? They’re both abroad, never giving a second thought about their spoiled daughter...Those two think you couldn’t be safer and more comfortable…It’s ridiculous...A girl who has everything...Takes it upon herself to put others down...You’ve put y/n down for years...You’ve never let go your childish and petty hatred for her...And for what reason?”

Heather’s resolve faded when she realized what you had.

“Jaemin…” You started.

“Y/n, did you not realize that each person on this trip has fucked with you one way or another?” He asked.

Well, the girls were bitches, yes, but…

“Naeun was the one who spread that rumor about you getting your breast implants...Tzuyu was the one who nearly ran you over in the student parking lot...Renjun body shamed you in the boys’ locker room...And Yangyang told us all that he wanted to take your virginity this weekend…”

“Jaemin!” Heather exclaimed.

“You should’ve been careful with who you added in your group chat full of morons, Heather....Ah, and Heather, dear...you’re the ringleader in all of this...You goaded Naeun and Tzuyu to do these things to y/n. You’ve set out to put y/n down for a long time now. You even went along with Renjun and Yangyang’s comments about y/n’s body...Fuck you, by the way, she’s perfect in every way...And I should’ve made them all go through slower...more painful deaths for all of the things you said about her...”

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. You had no idea that even boys were targeting you...First off, you literally just breathed. The girls were childish and petty but…

“Jaemin,” you said.

“Yes, sweetheart?” Jaemin asked with a kinder smile to you.

“What they all did to me was wrong...But you didn’t have to…”

Jaemin’s eyes widened. “Kill them? Well, it wasn’t up to you...All of these people are worthless scum that won’t amount to much, honestly….So was it really a waste?”

Heather surprised you by pulling a handgun out of her pocket. She shot Jaemin in the chest. “y/n, let’s go!” She pulled you out of the bed and you both ran for your lives.

“Agh!” Jaemin groaned as he fell to the ground.

You both ran down the stairs. Heather unlocked the front door, knowing the house was no longer safe.

You both ran down the steps of the entrance. You had to pull Heather with you because she ran too slow for you. Then, you heard a gunshot.” Heather fell down. She’d been shot in the foot. “Fuck!” She yelled.

You turned to see Jaemin at the entrance with a hunting rifle. “Bulletproof vest, baby!”

You yelled as you tried to help Heather up.

Jaemin asked, genuinely confused. “Y/n, why are you running? This has nothing to do with you.”

You gaped. “Are you kidding me? Apparently, this has everything to do with me…Jaemin put the gun down! Please stop!”

Jaemin shook his head. “Out of the question, sweetheart. You’d be smart to leave Heather to me.”

Heather began to cry. “No…”

You wrapped Heather’s arm around you and both walked off. Heather winced with pain but she could manage as you kept running. Jaemin was getting closer and closer. He waited, then.

You and Heather were confused. Why did he stop running?

You and Heather both walked over a bear traps you both hadn’t seen.

You yelped in pain and Heather cried out, “Son of a bitch!”

It hurt for both of you to move an inch. You both cried.

Jaemin made his way over, using a flashlight. He sighed. “Y/n, you should’ve stopped running. Now you’ve your beautiful ankle...Well, it’s no big deal...I can disinfect it and patch it up nicely for you...After I’m done with Heather.”

“Jaemin, no, please stop. You don’t have to do this. I don’t want you to do this. That’s enough!” You pleaded.

At the sound of your last two words, Jaemin froze. The words brought him back to when he was a kid and he would pummel other children for bullying his younger siblings. His parents would beg him to stop. It was too bad that their words didn’t stick. And your words were no different.

Jaemin sighed. “I’m sorry, y/n…” He whacked the back of his gun over your head so you blacked out.

___

Heather had also been knocked out. She awoke to being tied up and sitting in the hot tub beside the Olympic sized swimming pool in the backyard. She noted that bricks were tied around her ankles. As she tried to pull herself up, it was impossible for her to get out.

Jaemin smiled wickedly as he wielded the thermostat. “You’ve always prided yourself on being the hottest girl at our college...Why don’t we put that to the test?”

“Jaemin, please stop! I am so sorry!” She cried. “Please don’t do this! I messed up! I...I’ve always been jealous of y/n! Because she was the one who had everything. The perfect family. The perfect grades. The perfect body. Everything about her is so damn effortless that I hated it.” She hoped that pouring her soul out to him might make him change his mind.

“Oh, boohoo…” Jaemin said as he increased the heat.

Heather grew uncomfortable. “Jaemin...Stop...Please...It’s too hot…”

Jaemin sighed. “Goodbye Heather…”

___

You slowly woke up seated on the passenger side of Jaemin’s Jeep. Your eyes quickly opened when you realized that. You jerked awake and found Jaemin in the driver’s seat, calm and composed. “I think we’re alone now...”

You backed up against your window. “Jaemin! Where is Heather?”

“Oh, she’s tied up at the moment...In the hot tub...She is indeed the hottest girl from our college now…” Jaemin said, a chuckle escaping his lips at his pun.

You were about to be sick. You pulled the window and vomited. You tried moving by the gash from the bear trap made you wince and groan in pain.

“Oh, y/n...I didn’t mean for you to get hurt...You couldn’t help it, though. Wanting to help that brat till the end...Because you see the good in people...You are simply too pure.”

“Jaemin...Where are we going?”

“To the next town...Where we will report a murderer that broke into Heather’s summer home…”

You looked at him in disbelief. Surely, he wouldn't turn himself in.

“The murderer is at large and we narrowly escaped, y/n...I got you out of the bear trap and we were able to get away in my car…”

You shook your head. “Jaemin, no...They’ll never believe you...”

Jaemin shocked you by breaking down the same way he had the day before you left for the trip. “Officers, please h-help us. Our friends are gone!”

You looked at him in disbelief. Did he fake crying before?

Well, you did think he was a tremendous actor. You just didn’t know how right you were.

“Jaemin, this is wrong…” You started.

He sighed. “Y/n...you worry too much...Now your life will be brighter...It’ll be perfect now. Perfect for the perfect girl…”

You contemplated how the hell you could get away from Jaemin. Your options were limited as he’d taken your phone. You couldn’t exactly run that far but you could find a way to slow him down. You noticed Heather’s car off the side of the road. It’d rammed into a tree. Jaemin must have tampered with Heather’s car, you realized. He did admit to having a hand in their disappearance, after all.

You thought fast and with all of your strength you moved over to Jaemin’s side and turned the wheel so the car collided into the trees.

The impact was intense but you’d dodged most of the impact. Jaemin laid next to you, unconscious and bleeding.

You limped out of the car and checked Heather’s car. As you feared, Renjun and Tzuyu died from the impact. It was a gruesome sight. They dealt with blunt trauma. Their heads were draining blood. You nearly puked again.

Before you broke down in tears, you thought fast and remembered Renjun and Tzuyu smoked. You rummaged through the glove compartment for a weapon or a phone...You came up short with Renjun’s lighter. Tzuyu’s phone had some battery left. The reception was low so you had to find a way to get to the next town to get reception.

So now what the hell were you going to do, you weren’t going to light a car up on fire...And burn the evidence that was once Tzuyu and Renjun.

You noticed the gas leak that came from under the car. You got under the hood of Heather’s car and found the gasoline tank leaking. You grabbed an empty Starbucks cup from the front seat and let the gasoline slip in.

___

You ran, not getting very far when Jaemin called out to you. He was able to walk normally and he was quickly catching up to you.

“Y/n! Sweetheart! Where are you going? Without me...” Jaemin called out.

You turned quickly and found he walked over to you with an ax.

“Fuck off, Jaemin!” You said, realizing he was just as capable of killing you.

“Sweetheart, let’s just talk about this...I did this all for you...Because I love you...I want to make you happy. I want to marry you. Have twelve children...Ah, yes, you said twelve may be excessive...How does eleven kids sound?”

You rolled your eyes. He was fucking insane. You decided to provoke him. “What makes you think I would marry a deranged killer?”

Jaemin’s face was unreadable then. You hid the cup of gasoline away in your sweater. Pretending you've injured your arm so Jaemin wouldn’t be the wiser.

“Y/n, please…”

You entertained him by turning around.

“What, Jaemin? How could you possibly convince me that anything you did was okay?”

“If you let me try…” Jaemin started. He got closer to you.

You waited for him to get closer and quickly doused him with the gasoline.

Jaemin coughed as some of the gasoline got in his mouth. “y/n, what are you-”

“Goodbye, Jaemin.” You ignited Renjun’s lighter and tossed it at him.

Jaemin clothes caught on fire. He yelled in agony as you watched him struggle. He threw the axe at you but he missed. You cried as you went back to Jaemin’s car and started up the ignition. Thank goodness, it still worked.

Jaemin immediately removed his clothes to remove himself from most of the flames and patted himself down. He immediately charged at you as you backed the car up from the tree.

You didn’t think twice as you ran him over. Checking the rearview mirror and seeing the job hadn’t been completed, you reversed the car and ran him over again.

You waited ten minutes to see that Jaemin was dead. You got out of the car and kicked his body to check for any movement. You got his heavy, lifeless body into the car with you. You checked his pulse again. He was dead. You checked multiple times because once again, you weren’t about to become a movie cliche.

You made it to the next town and reported Jaemin’s murders and how you killed him in self-defense. You explained your weekend of terror and you were at the station all week for questioning. Your family joined you and consoled you as you told them all you knew.

The police scoured the mansion. They found Yangyang’s body in the pool house, beaten to a bloody pulp. They found Naeun’s body in her bed, like she’d been in perpetual slumber. They found Heather’s body in the hot tub, wrinkled and burnt. They found Heather’s car where Tzuyu and Renjun’s bodies remained.

Jaemin told you the truth. He worked part-time at hardware store. He had been fired that day for snapping at one of the customer’s who was berating his wife. Before Jaemin left, he stole an ax. He really did get the ax, like he’d told you.

It turned out Jaemin tampered with the reception at Heather’s house and because her house was already remote...Jaemin was able to use that to his advantage. He used the last of the reception before he cut it off to send the texts about Yangyang from a burner phone, which was uncovered in his Jeep. Yangyang’s phone was unlocked and the police uncovered his messages that were supposedly from his dealer, who he scheduled to meet with the night he disappeared. It turned out Jaemin hacked into the dealer’s phone to get Yangyang right where he wanted him. Jaemin did indeed tamper with the wires of Heather’s car so Tzuyu and Renjun’s fates were sealed. The leftover lasagna Jaemin had prepared was analyzed and there were traces of crushed peanuts in the lasagna. Naeun had a severe peanut allergy. Naeun’s EpiPen was found with Jaemin’s other belongings. When you’d saved Naeun with your EpiPen, Jaemin took it upon himself to smother Naeun with a pillow in her sleep. Jaemin had planted bear traps around the front lawn, which was how he caught you and Heather. Heather died from heat exhaustion in the hot tub as she was tied up and restrained with bricks tied around her ankles. Jaemin had done all of this with gloved hands so no trace of his DNA could be found at the crime scenes. If it hadn’t been for the evidence he’d hidden in his car, then the case would’ve been more difficult to resolve.

Jaemin’s body was recovered at the crime scene. Thankfully, he was not a movie cliche where he up and left and awaited his next victim. He was dead to the world and most importantly, dead to you.

[Fin]

482 notes · View notes

hanoella · 3 years

Text

Affettuoso- With Feeling (Part 3)

Pairing: Bucky x Pianist!Reader

Set after the events of TFATWS: In an effort to start over and make a home in Louisiana, Bucky meets a friend of Sam’s who ends up being his landlord. With only a driveway to separate them, he finds that he’s not the only one looking for a fresh start.

Series tags/warnings: Slow Burn, Eventual Bucky x Reader, Mentions of Domestic Abuse, Canon Level Violence

Part 3 Word Count: 3k

A/N: Can you tell I don't really have a posting schedule? lol. I also introduced links to the specific pieces I had in mind. I'm using soundcloud because I don't think everyone has access to spotify. Trying to be reader friendly! This can be read with or without the audio, as I do my best to still convey the thought in the fic. Though if you can, I highly recommend :)

Thanks again for all your support! Every heart and comment motivates me and is just so wonderful

Read Part 1; Masterlist

---

A few days had passed since the night that Bucky had overheard your troubles. It had been quiet since, and you hadn’t left the house. The curtains were opened during the day and closed at night, the only telltale signs that you existed.

Doesn’t she have to work? Bucky thought to himself. He speculated all the different possibilities as he used the riding mower around the property. Maybe you were an heiress? You seemed pretty down to earth though. Or maybe you sold a patented idea for a ton of money. All this land had to have been expensive. And to not request actual money from him?

He eyed up the width of the gate for your fence. The riding mower couldn’t fit so he would have to use a push mower for your fenced off yard. He hadn’t seen one in the garage. Maybe the old shed at the back of your yard had one? Bucky parked the mower in the garage, taking a moment to make a mental list of everything. Depending on if he found anything in the shed, he might need to buy a few basic tools and a chainsaw for that fallen tree.

He walked out of the garage and over to the shed. The leaves were changing color and it brought a whole new atmosphere to the secluded forest area. Opening the gate of the weathered white fence, he looked around to see if you were out. No signs of life. Entering the yard and closing the gate behind him, he started walking to the back. Halfway through, he stopped at the fire pit. The grey stone blocks were starting to crumble, with a few of the bricks having fallen off. It would probably be really nice if he got a little bit of cement mix and filled in the gaps. Bucky made another mental note.

The shed had no padlock so he was able to open it with no problem. Amongst the cobwebs and bags of soil, was an older green push mower that looked like it might work. He gave the gas a pull and got no response back. Looking underneath, Bucky saw what might be the problem. He’d have to take a closer look later. Putting the lawn mower back onto its wheels, he pushed it across the yard, pausing when he saw movement though the glass doors of the back patio.

Craning his neck to avoid the glare, he saw you sitting at your fancy full keyboard. The way the piano was against the opposite wall, your back was to him. You had big over-ear headphones plugged into it, so he couldn’t hear the sound but he saw the flurry of keys being pressed down. Whatever you were playing, you played passionately. Hands and arms gracefully moved despite the speed at which they were moving. Enhanced hearing coming into play, he heard the muffled clicks of the fluttering keys. Suddenly, you pressed down forcefully, holding whatever chord you had struck as your shoulders gently relaxed. A deep breath. Arm creating a graceful arc as if you had studied ballet, you pressed gently on another chord. And another. Bucky counted three more times you did this before you let your hands gently fall from the keys to your lap. Several moments passed before slid the headphones off of your ears to sit wrapped around your neck. Another deep breath. This time as the breath escaped you, you stayed slouched, head tilting up to stare at nothing on the wall.

A buzz broke Bucky from his trance.

“Call me, new mission” The text from Sam on his home screen said.

He pocketed his phone, glancing through the glass one more time. There you still sat.

Unmoving.

---

The roar of the plane’s engine was just loud enough to drown out Bucky’s thoughts without being annoying. If it weren’t for the adrenaline of the recovery mission under the cover of nightfall, he probably would’ve been lulled to sleep. Beside him sat Sam, looking on his phone for the exact coordinates of the politician they had been sent to rescue.

“Here it is. I’m assuming there’s some sort of underground base since there are no heat signatures anywhere within the radius where he was taken. It should take us about ten more minutes before we’re directly over it.”

Bucky hummed in acknowledgement.

Sam raised an eyebrow. “Earth to Bucky.”

“What does your friend do?” Bucky asked suddenly, sitting up straighter and turning towards him.

“… What?”

“What does she do? I’ve never seen her leave the house. Is she okay?”

“If you’re asking why she doesn’t leave the house, it’s because her contract doesn’t start for a while. She’s technically still supposed to be in physical therapy but she hasn’t found a place yet. You know, your whole routine gets messed up when you move.”

“For her shoulder?”

Now it was Sam’s turn to look at Bucky, trying to decipher the motive behind these questions. Bucky shifted his weight in the chair, antsy under the scrutiny.

“Never mind, I-”

“Yes, for her shoulder.” Sam said, cutting him off. He stopped himself from asking why Bucky wanted to know. There was an awkward pause before Bucky explained himself.

“I just wanted to know. I’m not used to seeing people so…”

“Similar to yourself?”

“I was gonna say isolated but fair point.” Bucky admitted. Sam leaned back in his chair, looking straight forward.

“She’s been through a lot… I know you heard some of it.”

Bucky blinked in surprise.

“I realized the window was open when I could hear you drive off.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“It’s alright, it’s good that you know.” Sam said as he held up his hand to cut Bucky off.

“She’s just trying to get a fresh start. She’s in a raw emotional space and in the meantime is a little skittish. Just like someone else I know.” Sam jabbed his elbow into Bucky’s side as he enunciated the last sentence.

“Okay, okay, I get it. I’m trying!” He shouted as he held one hand up defensively and using the other to block the second jab Sam was trying to get in. Sam chuckled and then stood up, grabbing a parachute pack and tossing it at Bucky, who caught it without even looking.

“Figured you might wanna try an actual chute this time.”

Bucky rolled his eyes and mouthed Sam’s words mockingly with a grimace as he put the backpack on. Clipping it into place, he joined Sam at the side door of the plane.

“She used to play in an orchestra you know.” Sam said wistfully. “The piano. That’s actually how we met. She had volunteered to play a small concert before the dinner. It really helped raise a lot of money for the VA.”

Bucky stayed silent, prompting him to continue.

“Then that bastard she was engaged to beat her and then shoved her down a set of concrete steps when she tried to leave him. It was like a month after we all came back. She was in the hospital for a while. Broken ribs, broken shoulder, and a nasty concussion to boot. Neighbor saw the whole thing and called the cops but the courts were so backed up and the case fell through the cracks. Wouldn’t leave her alone after he got out. So, I pulled some strings and helped her move down here on the fly.”

“… That’s terrible.”

Bucky didn’t know what to say or how to react. They stood in silence, taking a moment to pay a respect of sorts to the trials you have been through. Then Sam broke the silence.

“She just needs time to heal in more ways than one. But she’s strong. Resilient.”

Putting a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, he squeezed it lightly with reassurance.

“Reminds me of someone else I know.” Sam said, finishing the conversation and pulling his goggles over his eyes, giving Bucky the opportunity to take the compliment without feeling too on the spot.

Pulling the door open, Sam shouted over the wind.

“Ready?”

Bucky nodded. Sam jumped from the plane and deployed the wings, the shield shining in the moonlight. Bucky jumped right behind him, using the glint of the silver star to guide his descent as he followed the man that gave the shield its meaning.

---

You laid with your head down on the kitchen table, letting the last golden rays of sun warm the side of your face. You were exhausted from going to physical therapy, especially since today had been the first appointment. All the measurements, all the exercises, all the stretching.

All the questions.

“So, how did you break your shoulder?” the young blonde physical therapist asked.

“Ah, I… fell down some stairs.” You said, looking down at your hands in your lap.

She didn’t look up from the papers, instead just raising an eyebrow.

“You also cracked some ribs and had a concussion?”

“… They were concrete.”

She looked up from the papers at you, analyzing. Her gaze softened and she asked no further questions on how these serious injuries had been obtained.

“Let’s look at your range of motion.”

You had practically stumbled into the house, kicking off your sneakers and plopping down at the kitchen table. Minutes passed by as you regained your breath, heartbeat steadying. The house was slightly cold since you had turned the heat down this morning. As your sweat cooled, you wrapped your arms around your legs in an attempt to keep you warm without getting up.

The sun feels so warm… You thought to yourself drowsily, feeling slightly less lonely. The sun was a cheap substitute for the warmth of a partner…

---

You jolted upright, the kitchen dark and cold. Neck and shoulder stiff from the awkward position you had dozed off in. Feeling the dryness of your mouth, you got up, stretching your neck gently while you walked to the fridge to get water. Chugging about half the bottle, you squinted at the clock. You had been asleep for about forty-five minutes. Groaning, you put the bottle down on the counter and walked into the living room to close the curtains. Grabbing one in each hand, you went to pull them together when you hesitated, noticing that Bucky’s apartment was dark for the third day in a row. The sleek motorbike that was usually parked under the slight overhang of the garage was missing as well.

He was probably on a mission, right? Not that it was any of your business. You shut the curtains and turned off the lights before lightly padded down the hall, stopping to adjust the thermostat. The heat kicked on, sending a puff of cold air your way. You shivered as you walked with a quickened pace to your room, shutting the door and heading into the master bathroom, turning the hot water on with just a tad of cold.

Waiting for the shower to warm up, you leaned over the sink and looked into the mirror. Dark circles under your eyes. Small scar on the bridge of your nose. Running your hand through the roots of your hair, you felt for the scar where the stitches had been. When was the last time you had a haircut? Or put on some makeup?

Some higher being must’ve felt pity for you since the steam from the shower fogged the glass, preventing you from tearing yourself apart any further. Stepping underneath the warm stream, you let the warmth seep into your muscles, then bones, filling every fracture and break with a temporary sense of wholeness until the emptiness of your heart and home caused it slowly to drip out until it, along with you, was gone.

---

The next morning, you weren’t motivated to do anything. You lounged around the house, sipping on coffee and browsing on your phone for furniture, clothes, even sneaking a peak at some pianos. Wanting to invest in one you’d use for the next several decades, you had put off buying one until the money from your contract with the orchestra started in a month. You were still well off, nowhere near struggling and probably wouldn’t ever be unless you decided to buy a mansion (which was a no). You just wanted to be careful.

In the afternoon, you popped a pain killer and muscle relaxer in preparation for the few hours you wanted to practice. Thirty minutes went by and the ever-present ache in your shoulder calmed enough to let you practice with relative peace. Sitting on the bench in front of the keyboard, you pondered what you might play to warm up.

Hmm, maybe a Chopin prelude? Short, emotional, familiar.

Your left hand held the soft deep chords as your right hand softly flitted around the higher notes. Breathing in and out with the music, you tried to ignore the ache that start to surround your shoulder.

Playing the last few notes, you paused before reaching over to the bottle of painkillers.

---

Shortly after finishing up, you dragged a small table outside next to the wooden bench swing that was hanging on the porch. Bundled up in a soft sweatshirt, long-sleeve shirt, wool lined leggings, fuzzy socks and slippers, you brought out your hot tea, several blankets, a pillow, and a book you had been meaning to read for months. You were determined to do something besides practice, watch TV, and scroll on your phone.

You settled onto the bench, wrapping the blanket around you, nice and toasty from the layers trapping in the heat of a thorough practice session. The extra medication had really helped keep the pain at bay. Tentatively sipping the steaming cup, you closed your eyes to further appreciate the sweet tones of peach and honey. Setting the cup in your lap with one hand, you used your other hand to flip open to the first page.

---

Bucky hadn’t expected the mission to get so complicated. Finding the base was one thing, navigating in and out of the expansive maze was another. It took a few days to successfully get the target out and back to the embassy. He hadn’t properly slept during that time due to taking shifts with Sam. Not that it was any different from how he slept at home.

The sun was letting its last few rays bless the earth when he turned onto the driveway. Taking it easy on the gravel, he eased his posture and slowed the bike. He put pressure on the brakes as he made it past the final wall of trees that hid the water that was reflecting the last bit of color left in the sky. Rolling casually into a stop, he parked and let out a deep breath, shoulders sinking.

A stray bird calling out turned his attention in the direction of your house. The porch light was on. That’s new, he thought. Squinting his eyes, he saw a bundle on the porch swing. Was that you? Quietly walking over while taking his leather gloves off, he confirmed his suspicions. There you were, lying on your side propped up by a large fuzzy pillow. Eyes closed and breathing rhythmically. Scanning the scene, he noticed the mug on the side table, empty except for the used teabag. Your book was closed, the page you were on marked by one of your fingers. You must’ve fallen asleep while reading.

“Hey…” Bucky said gently. No response besides a small nose scrunch.

He repeated himself a little louder, squatting to be at eye level while gently setting his hand on your arm and shaking you lightly. You groaned this time, eyes fluttering open, taking a moment to focus. You squinted and pushed yourself up into a sitting position, losing your place in the book and attempting to blink the heavy drowsiness from your eyes.

“Bucky?” You questioned hoarsely as you met his eyes. He was still crouching so you were looking slightly down at him. Brow furrowed, you searched the blue of his eyes before looking around to see how dark it had gotten. As you turned your head back to him, he stood back up, scratching the back of his neck just to occupy his hands.

“It’s starting to get cold. I didn’t want you to spend the rest of the night out here.” He explained, choosing to look out at the water, now dark. When he turned his head back, you had also turned your head to look at the water, exposing the side of your neck, the tendons and clavicle accentuated by the strain. Bucky swallowed and your eyes met his, oblivious.

“Ah, thank you. I must’ve fallen asleep reading. I just started going back to physical therapy so I’ve just been so wiped… Anyway,” you said, dismissing yourself mid-thought. He didn’t want to hear about all that. “…did you just come back from a mission?” You eyed the diagonal cuts of leather on his jacket, noting the missing sleeve that exposed the glint of the metal.

“Yeah. I was gone for a few days.”

“Okay. I’m glad you’re home safe.” You mindlessly said, picking up the book and other various items strewn about.

Home safe. What an unfamiliar phrase.

As the words echoed in his mind, you had opened the door and stepped in, turning your head slightly to look back at him.

“Thanks again… Good night.”

“Good night.” Bucky replied, watching as you shut the door softly behind you.

Slowly walking down the porch steps, he crossed the driveway to the garage. Turning his head just in time to see the last light turn off in your house, he stood with his hand on the knob, meditating on the effect that one short sentence had on him.

Glad you’re home safe. Was this what it was like when you had someone waiting on you at home? The tired eyes and gentle smile. Would that be what it was like when he came home in the middle of a night from a mission when he had someone to share a bed with? Gently shaking them to let them know he was home? Or would he try to sneak into bed without waking them? He tried to imagine what that sort of intimacy would be like as he entered his apartment and then his room. Unzipping his jacket and tossing it over a chair, he stripped down to his boxer briefs and climbed into bed, wondering what it would be like if it was already warm.

#bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky imagine #SoundCloud

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maxineswritingcenter · 3 years

Text

You Saved Me - Derek Hale x fem!reader part 4

I’m really chugging these out. Mostly because its practically written already. But I will let you know that in the original, I did write in “blue orbs” so you can assume how much I had to fix.

----------------------------

“Um, hi.” I said, very surprised and confused that he was here.

“We need to talk.”

“As you mentioned. But we can’t talk here, you are a suspect in a crime and this is the sheriff’s house.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

“Then can I get my jacket back, since you don’t want to be associated with a criminal.” This was the first time he had shown any sort of emotion besides seriousness. Granted, it was condescending.

“I didn’t say I didn’t want to be associated with you.” I handed him his jacket, a little sad to see it go, “You saved my life, I just don’t want you to get in trouble.”

“A little late for that.” He said, putting his jacket on.

“What’s going on?” I asked, stepping closer to him. He looked at me warily (as if he needed to be wary of me) but didn’t move away.

“You wouldn’t understand.” Usually, I would reply ‘then make me understand’, but I was still on the fence about him. He perked up a bit, like he was hearing something.

“Here.” He held out his closed hand, I held mine out and he dropped my locket into my hands. I gasped, reaching up to my neck and realized it wasn’t there. I looked down at the locket.

“Oh my god, thank you. I would have never forgiven myself if I lost-” I looked up and realized I was talking to no one, “And you disappeared. Okay.” My phone beeped in my pocket and saw a text from Stiles move across the screen.

“Scott woke up in the woods and ran into a swimming pool this morning.” I read aloud. This town was starting to just become weirder and weirder. It was a nice distraction from my own personal life, but now it was getting borderline concerning.

At practice, Stiles filled in Scott and I on what he had heard over the police radio. The body, or half of the body, had been sent into the LA coroner’s office where the lad had found animal hair, specifically wolf hair. Scott wasn’t paying too much attention though, he looked like he was in his own little world.

It was the first scrimmage game of the year and Coach was pretty excited, which wasn’t his usual tune. As the game started, I watched Scott pull off the craziest moves I had ever seen attempted on the field. He was moving so incredibly fast and he even flipped over someone and scored a goal at the same time! Finstock looked like his head was about to explode, which meant that he was happy. Or at least I think so. In a time out, he waved Scott over.

“What in god’s name was that? This is a lacrosse field. You wanna try out for some gymnastics team?”

“No, Coach.” Scott said. What I found weird was that his breathing was that of someone who had normal lungs and never had a breathing problem in his life. That just gave me a weird feeling, something that would stick with me for the rest of the night.

“What the hell was that?” Coach asked, motioning to the field.

“I-I don’t know. I guess trying to make the shot.”

“Yeah, well, you made the shot. And guess what? You’re startin’, buddy.” Coach smiled, slapping a shocked Scott’s shoulder, “You made first line.”

Scott grinned looking between Finstock and me. I put on a smile. I was happy for Scott, but there was too much weird going on.

I managed to beat Stiles home, even though he was driving like a maniac. I grabbed his arm as he walked up the driveway, “What is going on?” He shook my arm off.

“Leave me alone.” He grumbled, stomping through the house, up to his room and slamming the door shut. It was times like this that knowing Stiles well came in handy. He was pissed. And talking to him about it had a ten percent chance of working. They had put him in therapy when his mom died and the therapist told Uncle Noah that when Stiles was mad, it would be better to let him cool off on his own.

Scott was at the door soon after, after letting him in, I patted his shoulder, “Good luck.” I could hear the arguing from my room, but the words were muffled by insulation. Things used to be so normal before, but it seems like the fires in this town caused unnatural things to occur.

Maybe it was time I asked Derek some weird questions. Was this a good idea? Absolutely not. Regardless, I needed answers.

As I drove the dark back roads to get to the Hale house, I noticed that the moon was full. I hummed absentmindedly to my music and argued with myself on whether or not this was a good idea. It probably wasn’t.

I debated on whether or not to knock. The door was already halfway open and the whole back of the house was practically missing. I opted to knock.

“Derek?” I called, after stepping inside, “Derek, it’s (Y/N). We need to talk. There are a lot of weird things going on and I need answers.” I turned and when I saw Derek standing right behind me, I thought my heart almost stopped.

“Jesus, you gotta stop doing that.” I sighed in relief.

“What are you doing here?” That seemed to be his favorite question to ask, “Didn’t your parents tell you not to go out on full moons?” Oddly specific. But it was true, my parents never let me go out on a full moon. And when I was younger they would drop me off at Uncle Noah’s house, they called it a date night.

“Actually, yes. How did you know that?” I narrowed my eyes at him.

“You need to go home. Now.” He turned me around, pushing me towards the door.

“Hey hey hey, no no no.” I dug my heels into the floor, “I came here to talk to you. Something weird is going on and it involves you. I know it does.”

“You could not have come at a worse time.” He grumbled.

“Listen here, Hale, I came here for answers and I intend to get them so I’m not going anywhere until-” I was cut off by Derek throwing me over his shoulder and hurriedly taking me outside. I pounded his back with my hands and kicked my legs. But he was too strong for me to move.

“Put me down! Derek!” He growled and set me back on my feet in front of my car door. He slammed his hands on the car, caging me between the door and his body. He was so warm, actually radiating heat. I tried to fight the blush that was creeping on my cheeks.

“Why are you so stubborn?” He raised his eyebrows. He was so close and his actions made me speechless, “And why aren’t you scared of me? If you were smart you would go out of your way to avoid me like everyone else.” I finally found my voice.

“Well, clearly I’m not like everyone else. I can see that something fishy is going on. Scott is practically bouncing off the walls all after being attacked by something in the woods. And you were talking about something in the woods so that means you know what it is, so tell me!” I shouted the last bit. Our eyes locked. It was hard not to look away, his stare was so intense.

He sighed, “Fine.” He backed away, the cool night bringing a chill back after being so close to him.

“Meet me in the woods by your house tomorrow. I’ll answer your questions.”

“All of my questions?” I asked, a small tremble in my voice.

“Don’t push it.” He looked around, clenching and unclenching his hands, “Now go home.” And I did, I got in my car and left. I was going to get my answers.

“Arrested?!” I shouted in disbelief. I’m sure Uncle Noah took the phone from his ear.

“We had to take him in. That body in the woods was his sister, Laura.” He said. Laura Hale was a name I vaguely recognized, but I never met her before.

“We aren’t convicting him, but he’s already a suspect in his family’s deaths and now that we found his sister, he doesn’t look entirely innocent.”

“Derek wouldn’t hurt anybody.”

“(Y/N), you don’t know that.”

“He didn’t hurt me. He brought me to the hospital.”

“And that is one of the reasons why I am giving him the benefit of the doubt.” He said, then sighed, “Look, we don’t have anything to hold him over night. We’re just getting his statement and then he’s free to go. As long as he doesn’t leave the area. Now I gotta go, I’ll see you at home.”

“Okay, see you later.” I hung up the phone and fell back on my bed, staring up at the ceiling. Derek couldn’t have killed his sister. Especially cutting her in half. Or at least, that’s what I hoped. It scared me though, to think that Derek could be capable of that. But, no, he couldn’t be. He was the victim of happenstance. I think. But Laura had been out there a while, so the possibility of Michael was high. By running was he trying to frame Derek?

They found wolf fur on Laura’s body and while it doesn’t explain who killed it did say something about the area. It seems like the wolf population is coming back. They could have come from somewhere else in search of food or maybe the national wildlife service moved them in to control the deer population. I feel like everyone would have heard about that though, at least an email or something.

After dinner, I decided to go into the woods to see if Derek would actually meet up with me. I told Stiles that I was going on a walk to clear my head. A few minutes into the woods, I decided to wait instead on a boulder in a clearing near the creek. I had only been there maybe ten minutes when I heard the footsteps approaching. I smiled and stood.

“Now is it that hard to make your presence known?” I turned and stared, but the person I was looking at was not Derek. It was Michael.

He smiled, tilting his head to the side, “Hey, sweetheart. Miss me?”

“Stay away from me.” My body started to tremble, “Stay back!” I backed up, keeping my eyes on him but cursed myself when my back hit a tree. Michael closed the gap between us, leaning closer. I turned my head away, listening to him sniff my hair.

“You smell so good.” He hummed.

“Get away from me.” Tears made their way down my cheeks.

“C’mon. Just relax.” He placed his hands on either side of my face.

“No, NO!” I screamed, and shoved him. He fell back a few feet, looking surprised at my strength. I looked down at my hands, then him. He was pissed.

“Alright, enough fooling around.” He got up and I started running. I didn’t get too far, Michael had always been fast. I heard him stumble, but he grabbed my foot, bringing me down to the ground.

“HELP!” I screamed, “SOMEBODY!”

“Nah, not this time.” he dragged me up from the ground, wrapping his arms around my body and beginning to drag me towards the creek. I struggled, thrashing my torso and legs.

“HELP! DEREK!” I shouted, hoping that he was nearby, coming to meet with me like he said he would. Michael turned me in his arms, gripping tight.

“Derek Hale? You shacking up with that freak?!” He shook me.

“Michael, please, please, let me go, please.” I begged, my pleads were met with a sharp slap with the back of his hand. I yelped.

“HELP!” I cried again.

“Shut up! I said shut up-” A loud roar cut him off, his grip loosening. It sounded like a bear, but when I looked to the source, my heart started to pound more than it already was.

It was Derek, but he wasn’t entirely himself, not human. His eyes were a bright, glowing blue, his face was different. His brow bone was more pronounced. His hair grew down the sides of his face. his ears were pointed. He had large sharp fangs on his canines. He had claws on his hands.

Derek leapt from the hill that he stood on, landing on all fours and letting out another hellish roar. He came towards us, Michael shoved me towards Derek, starting to run the other way. But Derek maneuvered around me, chasing after him. The chase went down a hill, towards the creek. What I heard next was Michael’s screaming and then a heavy sounding thud. I stood there for a while, still trying to process what the hell was happening. What is he?

My eyes shot back up to the hill, Derek was walking upright, his face and hands back to normal. I stayed in my spot, waiting for him to come up to me. He stopped, he was breathing heavily through his nose. I looked over at him, he was splattered with blood. I grabbed his hand, seeing normal fingernails and hands. My eyes then went to his face, I touched his cheeks. No more hair growing down. His eyes were back to their normal green. Derek slowly took my hands in his, bringing them back down to my sides.

“What-What are you?” I whispered, not trusting my voice.

He looked at me for a moment before answering, “I’m a werewolf.” I left out a deep breath. Letting his words settle into my mind.

“Are you okay?” He asked softly. I could only nod, still speechless. He softly brushed his fingers over my cheek where Michael hit me, I winced. It was already starting to feel sore.

“Are you scared now?” He asked. I should be. I should be running for the hills. It was insanity to even believe in werewolves and yet, here one stood in front of me.

I shook my head, “No. I do have questions though. Um, you answered one of them.” I ran a hand through my hair. He nodded, placing his hand softly on my lower back.

“Let’s get you home.” We started walking, but I stopped us.

“Wait, no, we can’t go there. I can’t bring you to my house. My uncle could be there and when he sees you covered in blood, he will arrest you.” I thought for a moment, “Dammit.” I had to think of something, something to protect him. Whether he saved me or not, he still killed Michael and that was still murder.

“I got it.” I said, “Can you climb well?”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Read part 5 here!

Likes, Comments, and Reblogs are appreciated!

Thanks so much for reading and the next part should be out soon :)

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upthenorthmountain · 3 years

Text

The One That Got Away

Konmari-ing my Google Drive and found a few things that are a lot more written than I remembered - this one only actually needed a paragraph or two, which I managed to do, so here we go.

This is Flatmates nonsense, but it’s Flatmates that took a trip down a different leg of the Trousers of Time - after chapter 9 or so, say. So if you haven’t read that one then you should probably read that first, but if you have, you’re good to go.

Enjoy!

The One That Got Away

Two weeks before Sven and Jessica’s wedding

Sunday morning, 5am

“Kris? Kris.”

“Hmm?”

Kristoff woke, blinking. Anna was sitting on the side of the bed, leaning over him. “What’s up?” he said, peering at his alarm clock.

“I have to go to Japan.”

“...right now?” She was fully dressed, and now he could see her wheeled suitcase in the doorway.

“Yes, Elsa’s not well - she’s in the hospital - her boss rang me, I have a flight at nine -”

“Right now, you’re going to Japan?”

“Yes. I’m sorry to wake you, but my cab will be here in a minute, and I thought I’d better say -”

“It’s fine.” He sat up and rubbed at his eyes. “The hospital? What happened?”

“I don’t know, I think - sometimes she thinks she’s fine and she stops taking her medication. She doesn’t like taking it, but she needs to….I have to go. I’ll call you, okay?”

“Okay…”

The doorbell rang. “That’ll be the minicab,” Anna said. She hopped up and went over to her case.

“Take care,” he said. “If there’s anything I can do, just say.”

“I will. Goodbye,” and she left, shutting his bedroom door behind her.

-----

And just like that, it was over.

Anna stayed in Japan for nearly two weeks. When she came back she brought her sister with her, and they shared Anna’s room until Kristoff found somewhere else. They didn’t kick him out, exactly, but he’d been saving up for a deposit anyway, and when he found an end-of-terrace a couple of miles away in his budget that just needed some TLC there seemed no reason to wait. Anna made him a housewarming cake.

She was always with her sister, following her around anxiously. If he invited Anna over, Elsa would come too; or, more often, Elsa wouldn’t feel like it, so they would both stay at home. When they were all invited to Sven and Jessica’s for dinner, Anna and Elsa came, and Elsa sat in the corner for half an hour, and then she was tired and wanted to go to bed, so both sisters went home.

And when Elsa got a new job, in New York, Anna went with her.

-----

Three years later

The rain started just as Kristoff was heading out of the town centre. Just a drizzle, but the clouds told him it would be a lot more soon, and he hadn’t brought an umbrella, or the car for that matter. He turned up his collar and increased his pace.

“Kris! Kristoff! KRISTOFF!” He turned, just in time to duck and avoid being stabbed in the eye by a bright yellow umbrella. And Anna - Anna was here, and she was flinging her arms around him, her umbrella in his face and her shopping bags swinging round to smack him on his back. “It’s you!”

“It’s you,” he replied, stepping back. “I didn’t know you were back in the country.”

“I am, well, obviously I am -” She peered up at the sky. “Ugh, the rain - do you have a minute? Come on,” and she was leading him through the door of a nearby cafe.

-----

Kristoff had a minute. He had all the minutes, with Anna sitting opposite him in the warm fug of the cafe, humming while she stirred marshmallows into her hot chocolate.

They talked. It was as easy to talk to her as always, and that seemed both amazing and obvious. She was clearly happy to be back; she kept saying things like ‘Now I’m home I need to see if I can find my library card,’ and ‘It’s so nice to be home and to be able to get all my favourite snacks.’

“How long have you been back in the UK?” he asked.

“A month or so. I only just moved back to Arundel, though. It took me a while to find somewhere, and it’s a tiny little bedsit but it’ll do to get me started. I start my new job on Monday. And I was thinking about how to get back in touch with everyone, and here you are!”

“Here I am - and I still have the same phone number, you know.”

“I don’t, I got a new contract when I came back home, let me ring you and you’ll have it - there you go. How’re Sven and Jessica?”

“Really good. Ben’s nearly eight months now.”

“I know, I can’t believe they have a BABY - I need to meet this baby, I love babies, you have to hook me up.”

“I expect I can manage that, they’d love to see you. How’s your sister?”

“She’s fine, she’s really great. Really settled. She likes America. Or at least, she likes where she works, she likes the people. I’d be surprised if she ever comes back home, if I’m honest.”

“But you didn’t? I mean, you didn’t like America?”

Anna shrugged. “I liked it well enough…well, Elsa had this job with her company sponsoring her and everything, I had problems with visas and stuff...and I missed the UK. And.” She fiddled with her spoon. “I realised that - I saw a therapist for a while and I realised that I needed to get back to my own life. It’s not my job to follow Elsa around and make sure she’s alright. It’s Elsa’s job to make sure she’s alright. She’s my sister and I love her but she’s a grown up.”

Kristoff hesitated for a moment, not sure what to say.

“I mean, I left my whole life behind, my job, my friends - with and without benefits,” Anna said, and grinned at him.

He smiled back, trying not to blush. “That seems like a long time ago, somehow.”

“That was good, though, wasn’t it?” Anna said. “That summer. So much fun. I hope you realise you ruined me for other men.”

He laughed.

“No, I’m serious. I slept with - not like a lot of people, but a couple - like I’d go out with someone a few times, they’d seem nice, then we’d do it and I’d be like - it was better with Kristoff, so why am I even bothering? I know it can be better than this, why settle? You ruined it.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You should be.”

“I’m sorry I’m so good in bed that I ruined your dating life forever.”

“You should be. This is the part where you return the compliment.”

“I haven’t really been out with anyone since you left. Not that we were going out. You know what I mean.”

“Really? Not anyone?”

He shrugged. “Maybe you did ruin me. It wouldn’t be as good as with Anna, so what’s the point.”

“Huh.”

Their drinks were finished. Anna scraped the last dregs of hot chocolate out of her mug and said “The rain’s stopped. I should get back, I have things to do, all my stuff is still in boxes...”

“Oh, sure. Well, it was lovely to -”

“Walk me back? It’s just around the corner.”

-----

It was actually about half a mile, but Kristoff didn’t mind. Anna kept turning and grinning up at him, and then he would smile back, and it felt like being bathed in sunshine. He’d missed her so much.

Anna’s bedsit was on the second floor above a newsagents, up a narrow flight of stairs stacked with bound newspapers.

“Home sweet home,” she said brightly as she unlocked the door. “Well, it’ll do for now.”

She smiled at him again. “I bet your house is looking pretty good after three years.”

“It’s alright, yeah. You’ll have to come over and see it some time.”

“Try and stop me.”

Kristoff wasn’t sure, afterwards, who kissed who. He just knew that her lips were on his, and he was pulling her into his arms, and it was so familiar that he didn’t even need to think about it, just revel in the warmth of her skin and the taste of her mouth, her little gasping moan as she pressed herself against him. She pulled away to say his name, and he kissed her neck, in just the spot that he knew she liked; and she sighed and said his name again, more firmly. “Kristoff.”

“Yeah?”

“Kris, I don’t want…”

Shit. He’d misread that. He pulled all the way back, letting her go, embarrassed.

“No, it’s okay,” she said. “I just don’t want - it to be like it was before. I don’t want - just that.” She tugged on his hand until he met her gaze. “I thought about it a lot, and - I think, if I hadn’t gone away, we would have been together, properly. That’s what I wanted, then, but I didn’t say anything because I didn’t know if you felt the same way.”

Kristoff couldn’t help it. He started laughing. “I’m sorry - I’m sorry. But. I didn’t say anything. Because I didn’t know if you felt the same way.”

“Really?” Anna started laughing, and buried her head in his chest. He wrapped his arms around her. “Really.”

“What a pair of idiots,” she said.

Anna rested her cheek on his chest and he stroked her hair. She sighed, then murmured something to herself; and he couldn’t quite make it out, but he was pretty sure she said ‘...it’s good to be home.’

#flatmates #fanfic #fanfiction #kristanna #modern au

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kaimelia · 3 years

Note

Would you write a story about Addison, Henry and Jake visiting Amelia for a few days and Ellis or Bailey or Zola being really jealous of Henry and that he calls her Aunty Amelia because she's their aunt and not his.

Homage

a/n: hi! thank you for the prompt and I hope you enjoy this!

---------------

"Who the hell is knocking on our door at 9 AM?" Amelia groaned, shifting her son onto her other hip. "Are your parents coming to visit again?" Link shrugged and pushed past her gently, rubbing his tired eyes as he opened the door and pulled on a mask.

"Hello-oh," Link's eyebrows rose, and Amelia paused from in the kitchen.

"Who is it?" She waited for a minute, pouring cereal into a bowl and placing it in front of Ellis at the table. "Elle, go grab the milk," she muttered, rushing towards the door.

"Amelia!" Her eyes widened at the familiar face in the doorway, and before she could think, she was rushing towards Addison for a hug.

"Addie, what the hell are you doing here? Oh, crap," Amelia pulled away and grabbed a mask from the table by the door.

"We all got tested this morning, don't worry. I came to visit you! You can't just have a baby and not expect me to visit; god, he's so adorable!" The red-headed woman held her arms out and grabbed Scout, immediately pressing her nose to his head. "I miss having a baby; their heads smell so amazing." Link laughed softly and pulled his mask off.

"Oh, Addie, you haven't met Link yet," Amelia leaned into his body, wide grins across both of their faces as he wrapped his arm around her.

"We've met over the phone, Amy."

"Amelia."

"Right, sorry. I knew if I called, you would've said no, and we all needed a vacation." Addison bounced her nephew up and down, smiling as he grabbed at her necklace.

"Is someone else here? You said we all," Amelia muttered under her breath, stepping out onto the porch. "Jake!" She ran down the steps and into the driveway, grinning as she wrapped her arms around her friend's neck.

"It's good to see you, Amelia," he opened the door to reveal Amelia's godson, much bigger than the last time she'd seen him.

"Henry! You're so big, now!" She picked him up, placing a kiss on his cheek before setting him down.

"I'll be honest; I never thought I would see the day when Amelia Shepherd was chasing four kids around all day," Jake mused, taking his son's hand. Amelia grinned.

"Neither did I, if I'm honest." They walked back up to the porch, where Link and Jake shook each other's hands firmly, their partners both rolling their eyes at the sight of their seriousness. "Okay, are you done?" Amelia grabbed her boyfriend's arm. "There are three very impatient kids in that house, and we should probably get back in there." They led Addison, Jake, and Henry into the house, introducing each of them to the children. Eventually, Link and Jake led all of the children outside, leaving Addison and Amelia alone with the baby.

"I like him," Addison brought her mug of tea up to her lips, taking a sip slowly before continuing. "Link, he seems like the perfect guy. Awfully tall, though."

"He is. Both tall and perfect," Amelia grinned. "I'm waiting for Jake to come back in here and tell me what he thinks. He was always a little overprotective of who I was dating, so if he can get past Jake, everything's fine." The neurosurgeon lifted her son from his play mat, holding him close to her as she approached her sister again.

"He looks exactly like Derek when he was a baby."

"You think?" Addison nodded.

"Mhm. I spent far too much time in your mother's house panning through dusty photo albums and staring at photos of him as a baby to not see it." She set her mug down, holding her arms out. "Have you told your Mom?"

"I did. She said she'd come and visit after the pandemic is over, but I'm pretty sure that'll never happen," Amelia handed Scout to her sister, picking up her own cup of tea. "I'm fine with it. Link's parents are both great, and his Mom honestly treats me like the daughter she's never had, so I don't need my Mom to come out here and validate all of my life decisions."

"You want her here. I said the same thing for a while, telling myself I didn't need Bizzy to approve of anything, but it feels good to have the support." Amelia sighed, easing her empty mug into the kitchen sink.

"So, you just showed up here to therapist me? I would've told you to at least bring Violet for that."

"Amelia, I'm just saying. You've built this whole life for yourself, the perfect boyfriend, your own family, your dream job, and I know you haven't always been close with your biological family."

"Haven't ever been close," Amelia muttered.

"Still. That doesn't mean that you can't build relationships with them. Think about how spoiled Scout would get on every birthday and holiday; gifts from his grandparents, aunts, cousins, friends, parents, everyone." The neurosurgeon shrugged her shoulders and remained silent. "But, whatever happens, you know I'll be here for you, right?"

"You don't have to try and parent me anymore; you know that?" Addison began to pace around the kitchen space, bouncing Scout up and down to calm his light fussing.

"I still feel protective over you, Amelia. I haven't seen you in person in years, and we both know that talking over the phone is so much different than being able to see you. I'm going to be coming up here a lot more often now; I have Scout as an excuse to come and visit." Scout cooed at the sound of his name, placing his tiny hand on Addison's face. "He's way too adorable for me to see all of his life through a screen. I'll be coming up at least three times a year."

"You've gotta bring Henry every time, too," Amelia looked outside, where her boyfriend was chasing her godson around the yard. "And Jake. I missed all of you; maybe Link and I will start coming down to L.A. a few times a year. He'd love to go surfing."

"Mm, maybe you two should just move down there." Amelia rolled her eyes.

"Well, if Meredith doesn't get better, Link and I get custody of the kids, and I doubt we'd be moving if that happens."

"For whatever it's worth, you're doing an incredible job with all of them. Having a newborn is no joke, and you're parenting three other kids during a pandemic on top of that? Charlotte keeps saying it's your payback for teasing her about the triplets." The door opened, and Link walked through with Ellis on his back, her giggles causing everyone to smile.

"Someone took a nasty fall, but we thought it would be better with a juice box," he walked towards the fridge and opened it, leaning down so Ellis could grab a juice box from the refrigerator.

"Auntie Amelia?" She looked over to see Henry standing in the doorway. "Can Scout come outside to play with us?" Amelia grinned and took Scout from her sister, walking over to where Henry was standing.

"You have to be super gentle with him," she whispered, leading Henry back outside. "Why don't I give Scout to your Dad, and he can make sure that everyone's being safe, okay?" Henry nodded enthusiastically and ran over to his father, tugging at the leg of his pants as Jake took Scout. "If he fusses, just walk around. The movement calms him down."

"Are you all gonna come back outside or just pawn off all the children on me?" Amelia laughed and crossed her arms over her chest, watching as her son snuggled into Jake's body.

"I'll go get Addison and Link," she muttered, heading back over to the door and calling for them.

"Auntie Amelia? I have a question," Ellis whispered, holding her arms up to her aunt. Amelia lifted her and sat down at the picnic table.

"What is it, Elle?"

"Why does Henry call you Auntie Amelia? You're my Auntie Amelia, not his." She shook her head in amusement, brushing back some of Ellis' blonde hair.

"Well, Addison is my sister too, just like your Mom is, so I'm Henry's Auntie, too." Ellis pouted her lip out.

"But you love me more, right?"

"I love you all, Elle; I don't love one of you more than the other." Amelia began to braid her niece's hair as she spoke, Ellis' eyes falling to where Link was playing with Henry and Bailey. "You're my niece, and Henry is my nephew. Just like I'm your aunt, and Maggie is also your aunt. That doesn't mean that you love one of us more,"

"You're my favorite Auntie." Amelia laughed softly, biting her lip to hide the satisfaction she felt.

"Well, I don't have a favorite. I love all of you, but I'm excited to see Henry right now because I never get to see him. I get to see you every day, Elle." The brunette tied a hairband around her niece's hair and hugged the girl lightly before standing up. "Let's go play with them, okay?" Ellis took her hand, and they walked over to the playscape, where Ellis quickly scampered up the ladder to the top of the structure. "How long are you staying?" She asked Jake as he paced around the lawn, bouncing Scout up and down.

"We're up here for a week. Figured we'd spend some time with you, go up to Mount Rainier, just do anything to give Henry a change of scenery." He moved to stand next to Amelia. "I like Link. He seems good, more relaxed than I expected for someone you'd be dating." Her mouth fell open before quickly turning up into a smirk.

"Hey, I haven't managed to corrupt him yet. I'm sure next time you come to visit, he’ll be a pessimist."

"Are you happy? Because last time I saw you, this was the life you didn't want to live. Every time someone brought out a baby, you'd practically gag and complain about women and babies."

"You know, I never thought I wanted this, but honestly? I wouldn't trade it for anything." She looked over at her son, his bright blue eyes staring back at her. "I'm happy, Jake. I really am."

#amelia shepherd #amelia x link #amelink fanfiction #atticus lincoln #amelink #grey's anatomy #amelink fanfic #greys abc #greys fanfic #scout lincoln #scout shepherd lincoln #addison montgomery #jake reilly #henry montgomery #private practice #my fics

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missmonsters2 · 4 years

Text

You Found Me

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader/OFC

Summary: Part II to Under the Light. Two years have passed . You think there are somethings you can’t survive, but you find a way. And when you’re forced to face Wanda once more, you learn that time can heal almost anything, but some things don’t change.

Note: This was part of my 500 (or 800) follower celebration a while back. 1/3 fics that I will be writing a part II for with a happy ending. This is about as happy as it gets LOL For any new readers, make sure to read part I: under the light for this to make sense.

Warnings: implied depression, panic attacks, moving on & therapy.

PART I: Under the Light

Genre: Soft Angst & Romance

Count: 6589

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The end isn't always what you think it is.

You think after the end, that's it. Roll the credit scene, and fade to black. That's the end of the book; there isn't anything else.

But it's not.

There's always something after the end, and in your case, it's called moving on.

"So?"

You look up, thoughts interrupted.

"I don't know, doc," you sigh, leaning back on the couch.

"Try to explain it," he gently asks, his legs are crossed as he's got his chin in his hand, notebook strewn aside.

You gnaw on your bottom lip, trying to string your thoughts together.

"I guess the hardest parts are the small things I have to remind myself that I don't need to do anymore. Like, earlier this month, there was a new Netflix show that I know she'd love, and I caught myself not watching it because I felt like I should wait for her, but I don't need to anymore," you hope that's enough to convey what you're feeling to your therapist.

"And?" He probes, and you sigh.

Of course, it wouldn't be enough. You knew better by now.

"And I feel...lost," you shrug.

Your therapist hums.

"Why do you feel lost?" Your therapist questions. "What was it about Wanda that made you feel found?"

Talking about Wanda still feels like there's a painful thudding on your chest.

"I..." You rasp, "Because she was like me. Broken. She saw me for me and loved me anyway. And that all crumbled apart."

"Because she's not broken anymore?"

You nod tiredly.

"So, what is the concept of broken people?" Your therapist asks as he leans back in his chair. "If you can be unbroken, were they broken in the first place? Is being broken a forever issue?"

You're silent because you don't know.

"Think about it," your therapist says, uncrossing his legs. "I think you should be opening to meeting more people, making more friends, and letting things progress naturally without too many expectations."

You nod, licking your lips, thoughts coming and going from your mind.

"Alright, that's it for our session today. Think about what I said and come see me again in a couple weeks," your therapist closes his notepad, standing up to let you out.

"Alright, thanks, doc," you say with a soft grin that your therapist returns.

"You're doing really well," he compliments you, "much better than when I found you."

You laugh, "You mean a real nutcase."

"Not at all," your therapist smiles, "You came here, lost and alone. Even though you had said you wanted to give up, you found a job before anything else. You have a stubborn fighting spirit, that even when you feel like you're at your end, you keep going. Be a little proud of that."

"Thanks, David."

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Do you ever wonder what the truth is? Is the truth just a matter of circumstance?

Because the truth is that you had run. You ran from New York and began again in LA.

You saw the missed calls from Wanda and changed your number. You knew that she could find you, if she wanted, you can't hide from her powers and you can't hide from Tony's money.

But running and changing your numbers told her you didn't want her to come after you.

But maybe there's a truth to that too.

"Hey, got your usual."

You look up to see the friendly coffee shop owner across from your building.

"Have I become that predictable, Lucy?" you reply with a friendly smile.

Lucy hands you your drink, laughing lightly as she does. She throws in a free muffin.

"Maybe you're just my favorite customer," she grins.

You quirk your brow at her. Lucy is undoubtedly pretty, with her blonde hair and green eyes. She's funny, and she's easy-going.

"Are you flirting with me over baked goods?"

"Is there any other way?" Lucy tilts her head.

You smile at her, and she returns it.

"Can I have your number?" She asks bluntly, and you find yourself pausing for a moment.

It's small things like this that you find catching yourself at.

The quick second where you almost automatically say no because your body is so used to having Wanda.

The next quick second, where it feels like you're cheating even if she's not with you anymore.

It's a constant reminder you have to learn to live your own life.

You grab an extra coffee sleeve on the side and the pen, scribbling your number down.

You give Lucy a small smile before you wave off and set off to get to work.

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"Hey, where's the fire today?" You ask your coworker as you see the office bustling around more than usual.

"We have a new client. She wants a marketing plan for her company. It's brand new, but she's bringing loads of money. Harris is sucking ass hard to keep her happy," your coworker gossips with you and you hum.

You're not really too concerned about it. After all, you're still relatively new to the company, only having worked for a year and a half.

You were just a novice marketing designer. You worked on small jobs, fixing up other people's work, creating a few things here and there. Your boss was just starting to give you more responsibilities and really liked the ideas you were bringing.

"She sounds like a pain in the ass," you say. You've met big clients before. Most of them were demanding and a little on the rude side, but you couldn't really do much about it when you're just a novice designer.

"Oh, we're passing by the meeting room, let's see what's going on," your worker huddles a little closer to you as the conference room comes up. As you pass by the glass walls, your breath stops.

It's been 2 years, but you could never forget her face.

She looks the same, a little more mature maybe. She's dyed her hair blonde, and no longer has the split hair part, but now to the side.

An array of emotions flicker through you, but it's the single, loud thought that draws her attention to you.

'Fuck.'

Her head whips over to you, shock registering on her face, and at least you know this wasn't a planned attack.

"Oh, she's hot," your coworker whispers to you, and the only response you have to that is swallowing.

"I gotta go," you mutter, speeding past the room and leaving your coworker alone.

You don't even know where to go, but all you know is that you can't be in the same building as Wanda, let alone a room. Bolting out of the building, you walk and walk until you find yourself back at the café.

You sigh, entering the shop.

"Hey," Lucy greets you, surprise on her face that you're back so soon.

You try to give her a smile, but it probably comes out as more of a grimace.

And when Lucy cocks her brow at you, you sigh.

"Sorry," you breathe, "I got ambushed at work. I need somewhere to hide, and I don't know, I ended up here."

Lucy merely nods as you take a seat at one of the tables, setting your bookbag down. You've got your head in your hands as you're trying to control your breathing.

A cup of coffee being set down brings you out of your momentary panic. You look up to see Lucy taking a seat diagonally from you.

"On the house for my favorite panicky customer," she lightly teases you, smiling when she gets you to chuckle.

"Thanks," you say, taking a sip of the drink.

You can tell it's decaf, and you smile at her being considerate.

"So," Lucy slowly speaks, "want to share what's gotten you so shaken that you ran back to my coffee shop before I even had a chance to give you a call?"

You bite your lip.

"I..." You start.

"My ex showed up at my firm. She's a customer. An important one at that, it seems."

It's probably not a good start to talk about your ex, one that clearly so affects you still, to someone you just gave your number to in the prospect of going on a date.

Lucy hums.

"It didn't end well?" She surmises, and you shakily nodded.

"Are you still in love with her?" Lucy asks.

You don't answer right away, but it's enough for Lucy to have an answer.

You don't look at her because it's obvious this was crashing and burning too.

"I..." Lucy licks her lips, "would like to take you on a date."

Your head snaps at to look at her like she's grown three heads.

"What?" You sputter. "Are you sure? I have a lot of baggage clearly."

Lucy shrugs.

"Who doesn't have baggage?"

Your expression shows her that you're unsure because this doesn't exactly spell out it's going to end well, not that it wouldn't either.

"Look," Lucy puts her hand atop of yours, "I'm well aware you're probably still in love with your ex. Whatever it was, it must've been intense. I know full well what I would be getting myself into if I take you on a date. But I think you deserve to go out with someone and see there's more out there."

You stare at her hand on top of yours, blinking.

"Just think about it," Lucy pats your hand as the door rings, indicating another customer has come in. "You're welcomed to stay to hide, and you know where to find me."

Lucy leaves you in your thoughts. You do take her up on her offer to stay because there's no way to go out back to the office. You e-mail your boss you'll be working elsewhere for the day, but he doesn't care as long as you turn in your drafts.

At the end of your shift, you get up, giving Lucy a half-shy, half-awkward wave and leave.

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You leisurely take your time walking home to be able to process your thoughts.

You feel a little calmer than you did when you first bumped into Wanda this morning, but now you had more on your plate with Wanda and deciding if you wanted to go on a date with Lucy.

Although time has passed, you were only really beginning to heal yourself. You weren't really sure if you were in the right headspace for dating.

It felt much more serious now that Lucy knew you had some baggage, and still wanted to go on a date. It didn't feel casual anymore.

You were beginning to walk up to your duplex when you spotted someone sitting on your steps.

"What are you doing here?" You bite out.

There she was, Wanda, sitting on your steps with her head in her hands. She snapped up, hearing your voice.

A wide variety of emotions passed her face.

"You're here," she breathed, and you find yourself recoiling with the thick emotion in her voice as she spoke.

Wanda stands up, going down the steps before she's standing in front of you.

The smell of vanilla and cinnamon invades your nose, and a whole new wave of anxiety passes you with the familiarity of it.

Your heart starts thudding in your chest, and you're breathing heavily. Something on your face tells Wanda you're about to have a panic attack. She starts to come closer, wanting to wrap her arms around you, but she pauses.

Wanda knows that she's the cause of this right now, so she backs up and gives you some space with her hands up non-threateningly.

"Hey," she softly speaks, "it's okay. I won't invade your space."

You close your eyes as you try to focus.

"That's it," Wanda tries to guide you, "breathe in. Hold it...that's good, okay, exhale slowly."

This repeats for minutes until you've calmed down.

"I'm sorry," Wanda says slowly, "I would've called first, but I didn't know your number."

"That didn't stop you from showing up at my place," you mutter.

Wanda bites her lip, but nods.

"What do you want?" You ask her.

"Can we go inside? It's not safe about it to talk outside," Wanda nods her head towards your door.

You frown, not really wanting to let her in, but you sigh and nod.

You pass by her, careful to not breathe in her scent as you open the door and let her in.

You barely acknowledge her as you drop your things on the kitchen table and start to heat your kettle for hot water.

Wanda walks in slowly, taking in your place.

She notices that it both feels homey and empty.

You've clearly taken care of your place, getting a nice couch, and the effort of getting pillows and throw blankets for it. There's art on the wall, but there are no personal photos anywhere.

It was like a show home.

You watch Wanda stare at your things as you lean against the wall.

"Why are you here?" You ask, breaking Wanda's thoughts as she looks over to you.

She purses her lips, let out a deep sigh.

"I'm on a mission. I didn't realize you were working there. I just wanted to let you know that I'm investigating your boss."

"My boss," you repeat slowly, and Wanda nods.

"I can't go into many details, but I'm undercover right now."

You grumble. Of course, the firm you pick to build your career has a shady boss running it.

"Fine," you huff, "I won't get in your way. Anything else?"

Wanda's eyes soften as she looks at you.

"How are you? You look good," she sincerely says to you, and you give her a blank expression.

There's a tumulus feeling rumbling underneath you. You want to scream at her because why is she asking? It's none of her business.

Wanda sighs again when you don't answer her. "I sincerely didn't know you worked at the firm. If I had known you worked there, I would've asked someone else to take this mission."

There's a bit of a sting to her words because as much as you didn't want to see her, it sounds like she didn't want to see you either.

"Well," you huff, "no worries about me. I won't get in your way. Do what you have to do."

Perhaps because there's a bite to your words, a tone of sarcasm as you walk back into the kitchen, Wanda follows you.

"Hey," she calls, grabbing your wrist to turn you around. You immediately pull your arm away, and Wanda lets go, an apologetic look on her face.

"I didn't mean it like that," Wanda explains.

It's silent, and you don't say anything, not making another move even though your kettle as turned off, signaling the hot water was done.

"I wanted to chase you," Wanda says.

The words hang in the air, and you're not sure what to do with that. You just let the words sting.

"I wanted to follow you immediately the day you left. You ran so fast. One moment you were breaking up with me, and then the next day, you bought a plane ticket and left," Wanda ran her fingers through her hair.

"I harassed Tony into finding out where you had gone. I bought a plane ticket, ready to go after you," Wanda stopped talking.

You were clenching and unclenching your jaw.

"But Natasha said I shouldn't," Wanda finally says, and you're ready to explode at her, barely able to just keep it in.

"She said that you were hurting, I was causing your hurting," Wanda frowned. "Natasha said you needed to heal, and where we both were, I would only hinder your progress. You needed a change of scenery without me."

You don't know what to say to that.

Because it's true.

With more time that passes, it's easier for you to admit that you being with her at the time was making things worse for you.

She wasn't in a good place when you had met her and got together. But Wanda was healing before you, and you weren't ready for that.

You relied on her too much, put Wanda on a pedestal, kept putting her before yourself.

You were probably hindering Wanda's healing too.

It was too hard for you to see her with Vision, even if it might've been nothing.

"I respected your space, and I didn't check up on you," Wanda tells you, taking a cautionary step closer. "But that never changed the fact that I'm still in love with you. I'm still waiting for the right time for us to get back together."

You recoil slightly as she gets closer. You're not ready for this. You can feel every muscle in your body screaming to run.

"Why?" You hoarsely ask, tears welling in your eyes.

"When you left, you said I had outgrown you," Wanda says, and you feel a slice across your heart at the bitter memory.

"But that's not true," Wanda shakes her head, "I had loved you when we first met, loved you when we were in the dark, and I will love you as we keep moving. It doesn't matter if we don't move at the same pace. I will love you."

They're pretty words, you feel. Because all you can remember is how she had said none of this as you were leaving.

All you can remember is how she turned to Vision.

You don't have anything to say except you turn to bolt for the door, leaving Wanda in your place.

You hear a call of your name, but you keep running, thankful that she doesn't follow you.

You pull out your phone and dial.

"Hello?"

"I know it's after hours, but can you please see me right now?"

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You staring a picture above the fireplace.

"Did you want anything to drink?"

You turn your attention away from the photo, looking at David.

"Water, please," you quietly ask.

"Sure thing," David grins as he yells down the hall for water, making you wince.

His husband, Liam, shows up looking unimpressed with David as he shoots you a wink before leaving.

You're in David's study room as he hands you the water and gestures for you to take a seat.

"Sorry for showing up like this," you apologize.

David waves it off. "It's fine. You came at a good time. Liam was kicking my ass in scrabble, he was getting too smug."

You smile lightly. It's been a while since you had seen Liam. When you had first arrived, you saw David pretty regularly and sometimes even ate dinner at their place while you were still trying to get yourself together.

"So?" David settles into his seat with his hands, clasped together. "What's got you rattled?"

"Wanda showed up."

It's quiet for a moment as David assesses what you said.

He hums.

"Why did she show up?"

"She's a client at my firm. An important one and she can't choose another firm. She didn't know I was working there," you explain as best you can since you can't tell David she's undercover.

David nods.

"And what happened?"

"I ran," you tell him. "I hid in a coffee shop I go to every day, where the owner asked me out on a date, knowing full well I'm not over Wanda. Then I went home, and Wanda was there waiting for me."

You speak so fast that David widens his eyes minusculely.

He doesn't say anything, so you assume you need to keep talking about what happened.

"I had a panic attack when I smelled her scent," you mutter, "I let her into my place, and she explained why she had shown up. I know she wasn't trying to ambush me."

"Alright, it sounds pretty standard. Did she leave after?"

You explain the rest of what happened to David, who seems to be taking in what happened as he sits in silence for a bit.

He hums.

"What did you think about what she said?" He asks.

"Lies," you immediately say. "Or at least partially lies."

"Why is that?"

You sigh a little frustratedly as you lean forward in your chair. "Why didn't she say those things as we were breaking up? I told her to admit it, she had outgrown me, and she didn't say anything. Saying nothing might as well have been agreeing. Now she's here saying that she would always love me?"

"And what if it was true? That you two had outgrown each other?"

"Then there's no point," you say, "even if we land in the right place, we could always outgrow each other again."

David hums again, and you hate it when he does that.

"Just say what you're thinking," you grumble, and he smiles.

"In my professional opinion, it's true that it can happen again. But here's the thing, love is not just a feeling. It takes work and effort. You have to choose that every day. Two years have passed, the two of you are different people. Back then, you were choosing to not move forward; Wanda was. That's where your insecurities had stemmed from when she was getting closer to Vision. Space apart might have been the best thing for you to not rely on and hinder each other. But now, you're here. Healing. Choosing."

"So, I should get back together with her?" Your brows furrow.

David laughs lightly, "No, I didn't say that. That's something you will need to decide on your own. I'm just here to help you rationalize your feelings and thoughts, suggest you do things that may help. That's why I think you should accept the date with Lucy."

"What?"

David rests his elbow on his armrest, rubbing his index finger and thumb together.

"Lucy was very clear she understood what she was getting into if you choose to go on a date with her. Seems like she's offering to show you a good time without any strings attached. You might not come across an opportunity like that again," David points out.

"If it leads to something more and you want that, you have your answer," David smiles.

You sigh shakily and nod sharply.

The end of the session comes, and David leans forward.

"Just remember, you're different than who you were two years ago. Wanda coming back doesn't change that. She's different than who she was two years ago. You don't need to idealize her. She's just another person too."

You shakily nod your head, thanking David for squeezing you in so suddenly, and say bye to Liam on your way out.

When you head home, Wanda is no longer there, but there's an address written on your notepad on the counter.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

The next few weeks pass by with a blur. Work gets so busy, you hardly have time to think about anything.

Not that it stops you from thinking about things, but it's easier.

You see Wanda in the building occasionally, but other than a nod of acknowledgment, she doesn't speak to you. You're sure it's because you ran out the last time, and she's trying to respect your space again.

Though, sometimes you find yourself staring at Wanda from afar. You think about what David says and how you're both different people. She does seem different.

She walks with this air of confidence that she didn't have before. She smiles more, and she doesn't look as angry and resentful as she once did.

You find yourself self-reflecting on yourself when that happens. You can admit that you've come a long way, but you aren't quite sure you'd categorize yourself in the same place as Wanda, but you are moving forward.

That night, you show up at the coffee shop, surprising Lucy as you come in.

You haven't seen her in weeks, you even stopped coming for morning coffees.

"And she lives," Lucy says amusedly, but you feel a little guilty for avoiding her.

You breathe, gathering your courage as you look at her.

"Would you like to go on a date with me?"

Lucy tilts her head, staring at you momentarily before she smiles, and you think she has a beautiful one.

"I'm actually just closing up, so if you'd like to wait, we can go to this nice little ice cream shop a couple blocks from here."

You nod eagerly, happy that you hadn't botched this up.

You two make small talk as she cleans up, catching each other up on the week.

The walk passes quickly, and you learn things about Lucy like how she had gotten her degree in literature and was a part-time writer working on a novel. The coffee shop was her parents, but they had passed it down to her when they had retired. She's thinking about it passing it down to her little sister when her sister is old enough.

You stare at the ice cream menu for almost 20 minutes, unsure what you want to order, but Lucy is patient and talks about her recommendations. You apologize, but she waves it off.

You end up choosing what she recommends, and you like it, but you're not surprised since Lucy seems to understand your coffee order.

The date is simple.

It's easy, you find.

Talking to Lucy is easy, and she's definitely a beautiful woman.

Even when Lucy slowly reaches for your hand to hold, with a half-shy smile, half-smirk, you let her.

You hear your name.

You turn around to see Wanda standing there, frowning as her eyes pass over your held hand.

"Wanda," you breathe.

The way you say her name, Lucy immediately knows.

But then you're holding Lucy's hand tighter.

"What are you doing here?" Wanda asks, trying to play it off casually.

"I'm..." you start to say, but the words die on your lips.

"We're on a date," Lucy answers instead, brow raised.

"Date?" Wanda says, looking at you, and you swallow.

That feeling like you're cheating on her comes, but you squash it down because you know you're not.

"Yes," you say firmly. "I'm on a date. I'll see you at work."

With that, you turn, Lucy in hand as you drag her off.

When you're finally far enough, you sigh.

"Sorry," you mumble, feeling awkward.

Lucy shrugs. "You handled it better than I thought you would. I thought you had swallowed your tongue for a moment."

You let out a rough chuckle as you keep walking. The two of you sit on a park bench, enjoying the weather, the ice cream, and each other.

"You're still very much in love with her, not even close to being over her."

Lucy speaks after a moment of silence when the conversation had died.

You look at her, surprised she would bring it up again. She didn't even say it as a posed question. She stated as a fact.

You sigh, "yeah."

"But, you want to move on?" Lucy asks.

You struggle.

"I don't know," you answer finally.

Lucy reaches over to hold your hand again, and you look down.

"Does this feel good?" She asks.

You lick your lips as you stare at your intertwined hands.

"It feels easy," you admit.

Lucy tilts her head but sighs as she pulls her hand away.

"Can I tell you something?"

You nod, unsure.

Lucy looks ahead of her. "I don't think love should be easy. Sure, that would make everything simple. I don't think love should be a constant battle either, but I think we both should get a love that's worth fighting for."

You swallow, looking away.

Because you agree.

It's so easy with Lucy. You know that if you let yourself, you could fall in love with her. It would be easy, and you know there's a simple path ahead of you. You'd know what the next steps would be every time.

With Wanda, it's always hard. It's true, you're not always fighting her, but being with her is not a simple feat.

But you don't know if you want that.

Lucy turns you and kisses you on the cheek swiftly.

"Maybe it's not with me, maybe it is. Maybe it's with your ex, maybe it's not, but there's a great love out there. For both of us. I hope I succeeded in showing you a good time."

You smile at her and nod.

"Thanks," you tell her softly, and although she's not yours, you feel like you're losing her a little. You're losing out on something wonderful, you just know it.

You can't help but blame Wanda a little for that.

"I expect to see you Monday morning for the best coffee ever," Lucy says she stands up, "and a big fat tip."

"I wouldn't have it any other way," you smile at her as she waves at you before leaving.

You stay on the park bench much longer after Lucy left, sighing.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

When work comes around Monday, you do as you promised and get coffee at Lucy's, staying the extra minute to chat before you're on your way.

Work is relatively quiet today, Wanda seems tense, and midway through the day, your boss is getting arrested in front of everyone. The executives are taken in custody for questioning, and it will be decided later on who will take over the company.

Everyone is allowed to leave for the day with that, but you decide to stay at the office longer to get work done because you get distracted too easily at home.

It's nearly 2PM when Wanda appears in front of you.

"Hey," she says softly, and you greet her back with a soft grunt in return.

You close your laptop, wanting to take a break as you look at Wanda.

"Looks like you're done your mission. Lucky you, you get to return."

"I'm staying in the area for a little while longer while things are getting wrapped up," Wanda shakes her head.

You merely nod.

But at least you know she won't be showing up at her workplace anymore. You get up, going to the copier room to make some copies of your report for next week.

Wanda follows you, standing at the door and leaning against it slightly with her arm.

"Are you dating her?" She asks bluntly.

And you pause for a moment before you continue with what you're doing.

"It's none of your business," you tell her.

"If you were over me, you would just answer," Wanda answers back, and you snap your head towards her and glare.

"Are you trying to pick a fight with me?" You grit.

Wanda shakes her head.

"I just want you to tell me if you're dating her," she stands up straighter.

"Why do you even care?" You grumble with a shake of your head.

"Of course I care, I'm in love with you," Wanda says it so easily that it pisses you off.

You accidentally crumble the papers in your hand as you turn to her.

"Wanda," you say very slowly, trying to rein in your temper. "This is already difficult enough for me. You coming back here, even if it's was unintentional, makes this hard for me. I'm a long way from where I was but seeing you just a reminder of how broken I was. How broken we were, and how easy it was for you to move on."

"You don't think this is hard for me too?" Wanda hisses at you as she takes a step closer.

"You don't think me losing the love of my life because of my inability to say the right things at the right time doesn't keep me up at night? I'm a long way from where I was too. I was just as lost as you were. You thought I had moved on, outgrown you, but I was just lost. You can't lie to me and say you weren't frustrated how you felt every day."

"But I didn't turn to anyone else when I felt that way!" You shout at her.

"Vision means nothing to me!" Wanda shouts back at you, throwing her hands in the air. "We just have a commonality between us, which is the stone. I was just learning about the stone."

Wanda conjures up red wisps between her fingers as if to emphasize her point.

And even though you had known that might've been the case, it hadn't hurt any less.

"You can't deny that we're bad for each other," you shake your head.

"I love you," Wanda throws out, and it makes you tense. "I know you're still in love with me too."

"You don't know that," you breathe.

But Wanda walks up closer to you, she gets up in your personal space, her face hovering over yours.

"Then why do you get so affected by seeing me? Your thoughts are a mess, and why do your lips tremble when you breathe my name?"

You glare at her.

"That doesn't mean I'm in love with you. You think I can't kiss other people? That I can't move on from you? Love outside of you exists."

"With Lucy?" Wanda sneers her name. You don't even have to ask that Wanda got her name through reading your mind.

"Why not her?" You challenge.

Wanda stands there, staring at you, her pupils dilating and contracting as she takes you in.

"Then, let's see you if you can run back to her after this."

And before you can say anything, Wanda's thrusting her hands against your jaw into your hair, gripping it familiarly as she slams into your lips with unadulterated passion.

She moves her lips against yours, tilting your head as she backs you against the photocopier.

It hits you so fast and so hard.

The feel of her lips.

Her scent invading your senses.

She tastes like honey and chocolates, and you know she's been eating candy.

She runs her hand through your hair. Her hand eventually reaches the back of your neck, and she holds it to keep you close to her.

It takes the sound of her soft sigh to bring you back to reality, and you push her off you.

You furrow your brows, chest heaving from her kiss.

You look at her, and she's staring at you equally as breathless.

"You're such a fucking asshole," you tell her, shaking your head as you push past her.

You're pissed.

How dare Wanda just...just kiss you like that!

She has no boundaries, no sense of what you're feeling.

You gather your things, glaring at Wanda to not follow you.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Wanda sighs.

She fucked up.

She knows she did.

Wanda makes herself some tea at the place she's posted to until she can go home. It was pretty close to the firm for obvious reasons.

She shouldn't have kissed you like that, but it was like this ugly green monster, and the fear of losing you when she saw you with Lucy overwhelmed her.

Wanda had understood what Natasha had told her. She had understood, and let you go on the hopes that the two of you would both grow and be in a better place.

It wasn't easy for Wanda, she felt like this giant hole was created in her when you left.

She wasn't a good girlfriend, and she had to work through that.

Maybe it was premature, but seeing you brought up all the feelings she never left behind.

Wanda looks outside, noticing the day had passed by quickly, and now it was dark out. She looks at the clock and sighs when it's already 11 PM, but Wanda is feeling no closer to being able to sleep.

Wanda knew she was going to need to apologize, that was if you were even willing to talk to her.

She wouldn't be surprised if you decided to quit the firm and moved.

Wanda sighs, rubbing her forehead and temples with her hands.

Knock, Knock, Knock.

Wanda turns her head to the door, brow furrowing. The knocking continues until Wanda walks up to open the door.

You push past her and walk into her home.

"You know I had a lot of time to this about this, but what the fuck is wrong you?" You immediately fire off, pacing back and forth.

"You think you can just drop back into my life, even if you didn't mean to, tell me you're still in love with me and kiss me?"

You turn around and glare at her. "Is it crack? Is that what you're smoking? Because who the fuck does that!"

"You had no right to do that, you're such an inconsiderate asshole!"

Wanda frowns, taking the yelling. Your chest is heaving with anger.

"Are you done?" She asks, and you nearly start screaming at her again.

"Did you just come here to yell at me?" Wanda raises her brow.

It's quiet for a moment as you stare at Wanda.

"No," you finally after a moment. "I came to do this."

And suddenly, you're running towards her, jumping as you wrap your legs around her midsection as she's forced to hold you up, slamming your lips down on her.

You kiss her wildly, and Wanda response immediately. You wrap your arms around her neck, kissing her over and over as you tangle your hand in her hair.

Moans are heard, and Wanda is walking, nearly stumbling as she both holds you up and makes her way up the stairs to her bedroom.

She throws you on the mattress.

Chest heaving, but from kissing is a much better image Wanda likes. You sit up, grabbing her hand as you remove her rings and toss them aside, making haste to unbutton her shirt.

And Wanda pulls your shirt over your head.

Her body presses yours down to the bed, hands aligning as she intertwines them.

It feels right.

Wanda is going to make sure she loves you with all her might.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

It's late into the night, and twilight will come soon. You lie there, breath coming to a steady rhythm as Wanda covers your bare chest with the blanket.

She kisses your shoulder, and you sigh in small contentment.

Under the blanket, you seek her hand out, holding it.

"I'm in love with you still," you confess and Wanda smiles.

"I know."

"But I'm also scared," you tell her, "I'm not really sure if I'm ready for more right now."

"Love is patient," Wanda answers, squeezing your hand.

"How do you know it's the right time for us?" You ask her.

Wanda shifts in the bed, throwing her other hand behind her head.

"I suspect there's no such thing as the right time," she admits, "but I do believe we're both in a better place. The feelings never left. We're both choosing to fight for our own life, choosing to fight for us."

"I don't know if broken people should get second chances," you admit. It's been a ride in therapy, but these thoughts still come.

Wanda turns to you, raising herself onto her elbow.

"Broken people get to heal," she insists firmly. "We're not always broken, and I won't lie and say there won't be cracks, but I love you no matter what. You love me, no matter what. Our cracks are a beautiful reminder that we're fighters. No matter what is revealed when we're under the light, I will fight for you. For me. For us."

You find yourself crying, and Wanda dips down to kiss you tenderly.

"Under the light, you found me."

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