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saintobio · 3 years

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sincerely not. (7)

↳ gojou satoru/reader

with an arranged marriage set in place, the sacred bond is doomed with a wife who wants to make the relationship work and a husband who’s ready to ruin it all. unbeknown to him, a tragic fate already lies within the pages of his romance book.

genre. heavy angst, unrequited love, arranged marriage, modern au, 18+

tags/warnings. profanity, cheating, mentions of past abuse, mentions of pregnancy, undertones of manipulation, violence (not to reader), alcohol/intoxication, family drama, explicit smut and more filthy smut

notes. 13.7k wc! bc of the record-breaking length of this chapter, pls excuse any errors lmao :< i’m sorry for the delay but i hope the lengthy chapter will suffice. i aim to write lesser wc for the next chapters so i can update quicker :)

series masterlist -> episode eight

“Y/N! Y/N! Wait for me!”

The sound of tiny footsteps bounced off the walls as a little girl ran through the corridors of their mansion with a boy of the same age following her behind. Instead of taking their siesta, they were chasing each other through the afternoon heat, hiding from the eyes of their nannies until they made it out to the orchard. Squeals and giggles echoed through the open air before both children headed straight towards the one place where they always hid together—the treehouse, a small man-made shelter that was sitting on top of the mahogany tree.

“Haah! You run so fast,” said the little boy, crouching down to press his hands on his knees as he panted out of breath. No one else had occupied their treehouse in this sunny afternoon aside from them. “Where’d you hide your baby?”

The girl grinned and skipped towards an old chest where they kept their toys ranging from Satoru’s collection of Hot Wheels to Y/N’s Barbie dolls. Her favorite was a gift from her favorite Auntie, Satoru’s mom, who had given her the Baby Alive doll that she often carried around the mansion. “It’s here,” she cheerfully presented before swaying the doll in her arms. “She’s hungry!”

“It’s a girl?” Satoru rummaged through the chest box and grabbed his old Nerf gun. “Lame. A boy is better.”

“Hey!” Little Y/N protectively held her baby and scooted away, pouting as the mischievous boy sniggered at her. “Don’t show your gun in front of my baby! That’s bad.”

Being naturally playful, he blasted the foam dart against the wall and startled the girl from her seat. “What? It’s cool. Look, I’ll shoot this target.”

A visible frown appeared on Y/N’s face as she stomped her way out of the treehouse. “You’re making my baby cry! We’re leaving.”

“Wait—!” Satoru was quick to drop his toy to chase after the girl, pulling her back and wrapping his little arms around her. Her youthful, doe eyes looked at his cerulean orbs with familiar glint. “Don’t leave. Let’s play.”

Y/N could not help but to shyly avert her eyes because the boy was too close in assessing the emotions on her face. It was getting harder and harder to deny her crush towards the young heir of the Gojou clan when they always spent their weekends together. “But you’re scaring me with your toy…”

He held a hand up to make an oath. “Okay, no more.” And without thinking twice, he pressed his small lips against hers and pulled away to mirror the surprised look on her face. “You don’t like my kiss?”

The sweet moment limned her entire face with a rosy tint. “Y-You…” She tugged at his shirt. “Be responsible! My mommy said I can’t kiss a boy until I’m married!”

Satoru shrugged, not putting much thought into it as he took the baby from her arms and placed it on a toy crib. “Then I’ll marry you.” He was laughing when he looked at his cute playmate who now had her mouth parted in surprise. “I’ll be your husband then we can buy another baby. How’s that sound?”

“But… mommy said babies are made with love,” she countered, soon having her hand held by the young man. Love? Satoru didn’t believe it. His parents didn’t seem to share ‘love’ even before his mom gave birth to him. He was a child born out of an arranged marriage一a child only born in this world with the purpose of serving as an heir. He was definitely not made out of love, because if so, then why does his dad always hit his mom on the face? Why does he yell at her and make her cry?

Love means happiness, and if such happiness could not be sought, then love did not exist.

Either way, he still made her raise her pinky finger up so he could loop it around his. “I promise, we’ll get married,” he made his vow to her at the young age of six, “then we’ll have real babies and live in a big house. We should have a little boy, okay?”

Gojou didn’t think that he could still remember his past memories quite vividly as if they were movie scenes stored in his brain’s archive, staying with him as he grew older. He was happier back then—he still had his mom and life wasn’t as cruel to him as it was now. It was the same for you as you didn’t have to deal with the grief from your mother’s death because everything was picture-perfect, everything was a colorful fairy tale. While the images were clear in his mind, things have changed—what was once a beautiful friendship was now almost nonexistent after you grew apart and went through traumatic experiences that ultimately turned the both of you into strangers.

It wasn’t like he came into this marriage with his silly childhood promises in mind. Satoru had just started getting a flood of old memories the more time he spent with you as if someone was flipping through the pages of his romance book and decided to look back at the start of it all. He wanted a baby because it could mean that he would have an heir who would be a successor to both of your assets combined, something that only a father could wish for his child to have. His child would be powerful as a product of you and him that would tie your families together forever even if the road may lead to a divorce one day. While his reason may be practical, a baby with you also meant that his six year-old self was able to keep his promise, a silly promise that he was proud to fulfill as a grown man of twenty-five. Satoru didn’t value promises as much as he used to, but being kids in love, it was the last piece of a happy childhood memory that he could hold onto. All the other adolescent memories subsequent to the ones he had with you had been erased from his brain’s storage simply because the rest of his childhood was a nightmare. One of the reasons why he wanted to forget his past so bad was because they were nothing but traumatic.

He had no one to comfort him from his darkest days, no one except you, nineteen years after your last joyful experiences as juveniles.

“Are you staying late for work?”

His voice came out raspy as he spoke. “I don’t think so.”

For the past two minutes, Gojou allowed his wife to fix the tie around his neck because it had already become his morning routine for you to help him prepare for work in the wee hours of sunrise. You would cook breakfast, make him coffee, choose his business attire, and fix his tie. He may not outwardly admit it, but being a housewife seemed to have always looked good on you. You were caring, nurturing, and gentle—the same traits that he never really experienced again since his mom abandoned him.

And by remembrance, thinking of the recent encounter that he had with his mother still left a bitter taste in his mouth. It was bad enough that his nightmare started coming back since she showed up, he also could no longer sleep without you by his side because you provided the comfort that he needed during his most vulnerable moments. Who knew that you could be the one person that he could count on when his fragility was at its peak?

He was supposed to hate you, not find solace from you.

“Why are you asking?” he inquired, slowly tracing the slope of your spine with his palm.

You gave a subtle shake of the head as you knotted his necktie, soon fixing the creases on his collar to ensure that your husband would appear presentable. Satoru thought of how tempting it was to kiss your moistened lips when you were only a few inches away, but he chose to restrain his weird urges of being affectionate. “I have to pick up your suit and I kinda just guessed your measurements. It would be good if you can come, if you’re free.”

“A suit?” He began fixing his cufflinks before he walked towards the tall mirror inside of your shared closet. “You got me one?”

“Yeah, it’s a new collection from Givenchy. I thought it’d look good on you.” You stood meekly by the door while your husband fixed his hair in front of the mirror. All the while, Satoru couldn’t explain the strange fluttering in his chest when he learned that you actually went to purchase something for him. He spent the whole weekend with Sera complaining in his head how you never bothered to send him a text only to find out that you actually shopped for your asshole husband during your spare time. At times like these, he felt even more awful for treating you unfairly. How could you still be so kind? “Look, I can get it myself if you’re not available—”

“Come to the office with me, then we’ll go.” Satoru towered over you as he walked out and gave your bum a light pat. “Go get ready.”

“Oh… okay.” He could see the suppressed excitement that coruscated from your eyes when he offered to take you to the office with him. It must have truly made you happy to have your husband finally taking you to places other than neglecting you in your spacious home. He noticed how you would get excited at the littlest things, appreciating every kind gesture as if you didn’t have the world bowing at your feet. In that sense, this was the wife that Gojou liked seeing. His humble, caring, and submissive wife who would always obediently listen to him, not the cold one who gave him the silent treatment whenever he tried to talk. He wasn’t keen to encounter the same wife that night at the pool.

Satoru knew he had roles to play, but he had decided to be a nicer husband for once. He couldn’t be certain if his lack of hostility would last long, especially when he just received a text message from Sera that made his heart pound faster than it normally would. For the first time in a while, he was oddly nervous and confused. His agitation made him feel like a deer caught in the headlights because the idea of Sera was starting to feel wrong within the presence of his wife.

Sera: Good morning. I can’t wait to see you today. I love you.

He typed in a quick response.

Gojou: Me too.

He quickly deleted her messages on his phone before you could see them. Strangely enough, the notification that he received after sending the message was no longer from his girlfriend, but a text message from his close family friend and now Finance Director, Mei Mei.

Mei: If you’re gonna have an affair with a receptionist, at least make it discreet. There’s a mole in the company who’s spreading rumors about your infidelity.

Mei: Mr. Chairman isn’t gonna be pleased. Be careful.

Satoru almost crushed the phone in his hand as he released an exasperated sigh. Which traitor could have caught him in his clandestine dates with Sera? Perhaps it was a good thing to take you to the office after all. If people saw you around him and if they noticed how loving he was to you, no further rumors would grow and his reputation would not be tainted. It was the only thing he could do to save the image of your marriage and, as shameful as it was, to protect Sera from being the point of scrutiny.

It was already an unusual day when Satoru decided to invite you to come with him to his office instead of leaving you alone in the penthouse. Things have been going well since the night you comforted him and you weren’t sure if he was only being nice as a form of gratitude or if he was actually being genuine for once. You couldn’t deny that you still felt hurt for all the things that he had said and done, but those things weren’t new and you always seemed to find a reason to forgive your husband for everything.

Any wife would not be happy to see their husband cheating on them, but since you didn’t own Satoru from the beginning, you couldn’t really uphold your claim on him just because he wore the same ring. At the end of the day, Sera had his heart. When they were together, they probably didn’t even see their actions as blatant infidelity because they were only continuing what they already had before he was locked in an arranged marriage with you. For this reason, you couldn’t fully blame Sera for wanting to stay with a married man. There was no clear prospect on when their affair would come to an end so all you had by your side was hope. Before you could allow yourself to start a family with your husband, was it too selfish to wish that Sera would be out of the picture by then? You may be patient now, but things have been getting emotionally exhausting day by day. Being selfless and understanding didn’t even guarantee your happiness.

You just couldn’t find it in yourself to voice out what you truly wanted in this pathetic marriage without being labeled as the bad person. How could you pay for the repercussions when you never intended any damage to a relationship that you knew nothing of? It was becoming clear to your head how you shouldn’t be too kind to continuously let people step on you. If you were going to consider what was morally right or wrong in this situation, Sera was on the latter. Regardless of the grounds of your marriage with Satoru, you were still the lawful wife so she had no right to give you a disgusted look after finding out that you had slept with your husband. But because of your kindness, because of your sympathetic nature, and because of your desire to make this marriage work, you chose to keep your sentiments to yourself. Like always.

Ironically, when you and your husband walked into the C-Suite floor that morning, everyone was happy to see their Vice President with his spouse—all except for Sera who froze in her spot the same way Satoru did when you crossed each other’s paths near the reception.

She almost dropped the files that she was carrying while she stood like a statue, looking back and forth between you and Gojou and possibly wondering why her man decided to bring you to the office today. Seeing you there must have been an insult to her because you could see that the veins in her hands were becoming prominent. She wanted to say something, but realized that all prying eyes were set upon the three of you. The employees may appear as if they were busy, but you could tell that they were intrigued at the sight.

“Sera.” You didn’t know what came to your mind when you greeted her out of panic, also aware that all of the executives and their secretaries were all viewing this situation as something that one would see from a drama series.

And while Sera was visibly dumbfounded at your presence, she was professional enough to get her act together. “Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Gojou.”

You couldn’t believe that this was the same woman who gave your husband hickeys when he came home from spending the whole weekend with her. More importantly, the husband who willingly slept with her was the one who grabbed your hand, intertwining his fingers within yours before he looked away from his mistress. “Get back to work.”

For certain, all words synonymous to being ‘shocked’ was how you would describe how you felt about this situation. You had no idea what Satoru’s deal was for holding your hand tightly as he walked past his lover and greeted the rest of the executives and their staff with a professional smile.

What exactly went on between them? What did they agree to after she supposedly found out that her married boyfriend cheated on her with his own wife?

“Oh my, you look lovely today, Y/N!” Mrs. Fujikawa cheerfully complimented while standing outside of her office. “Satoru must love you so much that he can’t be away from you.”

“Of course,” Gojou affirmed, smiling at you before glancing at his mistress for a fleeting second. “Can’t get enough of my wife.”

It was obvious how you were being used—either to conceal his adultery by parading you in his office or to show you that he was capable of choosing you over Sera at times where he had to. Both choices had you losing, but you tried to be oblivious for your husband’s sake. Everything was always for his sake, never yours. That was why you chose not to say anything when he took you inside his office where he immediately started with his work obligations.

There was no other word to be exchanged as soon as he was seated in his office chair because he had more important things to do, and staying silent was your only option. What you did, instead, was to walk towards the window wall while watching the bustling city of Tokyo from the top view. It was funny how you could see CFG and the Zen’in towers from a distance within the stretch of buildings in the central business district and you wondered if Gen was just having as much of a hectic day as she did the last time. Being in such a professional setup was quite suffocating for you, but it seemed to come natural for your husband. He was too comfortable in his seat, talking to the phone with his staff while he scanned through the documents above his desk. Seeing him like this had you realizing how he was truly made to run a company.

“Bring the updated financial report to my office,” he spoke to the other end of the line and slammed the phone down just as quickly.

You didn’t want to bother him so you took a seat at the nearby couch and grabbed a magazine to read. Inside your head, you were thinking of how Satoru felt during your awkward encounter with Sera because it must have irked him how he had to be seen with you instead of her. You expected that Satoru would once again blame you for putting his mistress in such a position, but he didn’t seem to bring up the topic even when the two of you were alone in his personal space. In the first place, how could he blame you? He was the one who took you to his office. He was the one who ignored the ‘love of his life’, holding your hand in front of her. You even felt bad that Sera had to see it and assumed that she hated you for allowing it to happen.

As much as the magazine helped with your boredom, your attention was stolen when you watched your husband from his seat. There was no reason for your heart to beat this fast when he was simply doing his everyday job in the office, handsome as ever with how serious his face was as he went through a cluster of documents. Your husband sure was attractive, but he was even more pleasing to the eyes now that he had the image of a powerful businessman. Satoru at home had a different aura than Mr. Gojou from the Gojou Group. It was almost as if you were starstruck.

Noticing how you spent the whole minute staring at his side profile, he then tilted his head to look at you. “Need anything?”

You blinked and looked away, smiling. “Nothing, sorry.”

A sudden knock on the door cut you off and a woman with braided silver hair that had bluish undertones came strutting inside the office with the requested file on hand. “Here’s the financial statement. I’ve included the changes in equity and everything else that you need to know before the general stockholders’ meeting. Didn’t you already have the updated file—” the woman stopped mid-sentence as soon as her eyes landed on you, “—oh, look who’s here.”

Satoru adjusted his suit before introducing you to the woman. “Y/N, this is Mei, the Finance Director. Mei, this is my wife.”

“Your one and only?” she teased him, receiving his annoyed eye roll in return. She then looked back at you with an amused smile. “Nice to see you in the flesh, Y/N. You look really classy and modest.”

Mei certainly talked too comfortably, but you acknowledged her with the same cordiality. “Thank you. It’s nice to meet you, too.”

“Do I have any meetings today?” Gojou asked, flipping the page as he studied every figure that was written in the financial report. “What’s my schedule?”

Mei answered by shaking her head. “No, you’re pretty much free today, but you do have to sign those papers on your desk. When are you getting a new secretary so you can leave me alone? I’m an executive, you know.”

“No one’s good enough.” Your husband gestured for her to take her leave while you gave Mei Mei one last smile before the graceful sound of her heels faded as she left. At once, the door was closed and your husband’s attention was all on you as he made a quick swivel on his chair. “Come here.”

The magazine was long discarded when you walked towards your husband, surprised by how he grabbed you by the wrist and made you sit on his lap before he rotated the seat back to his desk. The act made you weak on the knees, but you also didn’t understand why he did it. “Satoru, what are you doing?”

“You look bored,” he pointed out, placing a hand on your thigh while he reached for a fountain pen to sign a few papers. “Let me just finish this then we can go to that store.”

“It’s okay. I surprisingly like seeing you at work.” Slowly, you relaxed on his lap and rested your back against his chest. Maybe it was the perfect time to bring up the earlier scene. “And about Sera…why did you—”

“Don’t talk about her here.” His brows have furrowed even without looking at you. The walls were thin and he had to remind you of it. “Anywhere but here.”

You recalled Sera’s words when you first met her and how she told you that she and Satoru couldn’t really talk when they were in the office because his father would go berserk. You saw it in your own eyes how your father-in-law demeaned her like a pest, humiliated her in front of you to show her that you were better suited for her boyfriend. This must be the reason why they wouldn’t acknowledge each other too openly, afraid that any wrong move would put her in yet another shameful situation with the Chairman.

“Listen,” he spoke again, this time with a new topic to unfold, “don’t you think it’s best if our companies merged together? CFG could be part of our core investments and it’s beneficial for both companies.”

You shrugged while feeling his fingers tracing your thigh. “I don’t know. That sounds like an acquisition more than a merger and I kinda wanna stay out of the whole business talk,” you truthfully admitted, meeting his cerulean eyes as he leaned back on the cushion. “I leave it all for my dad and Gen to decide.”

“But you can convince him, right?” he encouraged, hand now moving between your legs. “He listens to you.”

Your father truly would give you anything that you asked for and you weren’t particularly happy about it. You never wanted to take advantage of his kindness. “I’ll respect my dad’s own decision and will leave it up to him.”

It seemed that Satoru had easily given up on bargaining when he released a weary sigh. Yet, while he stopped talking, his fingers never stopped moving from going further inside of your skirt. You tried stopping his wrist as you were nervous that anyone would walk in, but he didn’t really care. His lips were now trailing kisses on your jaw, allowing you to feel his hot breath on your skin. “S-Satoru, we’re in your office. You can wait at home.”

“So what? It’s been awhile. No one’s gonna come in,” he argued before slipping a hand between your legs, rubbing your clothed core with the tip of his fingers. The minute he touched your underwear, his eyes grew wide. “You’re wearing lace?”

You squeezed your legs shyly as you nodded. “Yeah.”

“Bad decision.” Before you could react, he was already pushing your skirt up to reveal the black lingerie that was gifted to you by Gen for your wedding. Your husband appeared to have liked it as he made you stand between his widely parted legs, hiking your skirt up just below your tummy so he could see how the lace hugged your waist perfectly. “You wore this for me?”

“N-No.” You denied it like your life was on the line. What you couldn’t deny, however, was how you were just as aroused when you saw the growing bulge on your husband’s pants. “Satoru, we c-can’t do it here.”

Knowing how stubborn he was, he twisted you around and pushed you forward to lay on your front with your elbows propped above his desk. Having the possibility of being caught in such an erotic position caused your adrenaline rush. You couldn’t possibly be enjoying this, right? Because when Satoru suddenly slid his fingers inside your lacy underwear, you couldn’t stop the moans that escaped your mouth because you shamefully loved every second of it. “We’ll do it quick,” he assured, orchestrating circular motions on your clit while pressing you further against his office desk. He glided his fingers between your plump folds to coat his digits of your slick—his skillful hand playing with your cunt before cupping the entirety of it. “Do you touch yourself when I’m gone?”

Was he out of his mind? You never imagined that your husband would try and talk dirty with you in his office. “I don’t—nngh!”

And Sera. What would Sera say? Why has he completely disregarded her?

“So you’ve only had my fingers inside you?” he whispered in your ear as you felt his weight on your back. “Do you want my cock inside you now?”

The bands of your lacy underwear were now resting on your thighs and two of his fingers entered your wet core by the time you gave a response. “P-Please—ah! Just d-do it quickly.” Hot. You felt hot, wishing that the air conditioner did a better job at cooling you down from your blazing arousal. Each movement of Satoru’s fingers that went in and out of your cavern brought tickles to your lower abdomen. “Mm—Satoru…”

“Be patient.” His tone was strict and you could hear the sound of his zipper coming down after he took his fingers out of your moistened pussy, kneading and squeezing your buttocks the same way he usually did with your breasts. “Sit.”

You whirled your head to look back at him and saw his throbbing pink head being positioned on your swollen entrance. He pumped himself a few times before manspreading on his office chair, holding your waist with his large manly hands to guide you. Your knees were shaking as you slowly allowed him to bury his hardened cock until you’ve fully sat on his member, grinding sexily above his crotch. You even had to arch your back because he locked your arms together from the back. “Wh-What if someone comes in?”

“Fuck.” Satoru was too absorbed by his own pleasure, now beginning to meet your hips with his own thrusts to have his wife bouncing on his cock. He watched how his shaft would disappear each time your buttocks met his pelvis. “Like that? We should do this position more.”

You suppressed your whimpers despite your desperation to just cry it all out because of how good he was with his rhythm. It would be embarrassing for anyone to catch you doing such an obscene act in your husband’s office, especially in broad daylight, so you tried your very best to restrain your filthy mewls. “F-Faster.”

Satoru’s guttural moans were deep enough to make you go crazy from this midday heat. “Shit. Shit. That feels good.”

You woke up this morning expecting that your day was going to be spent alone waiting for your husband to come home from work. You expected that you could burn the clock by continuing your sketches that you’ve left in progress, perhaps in the living room where you could have the best view of the Tokyo skyline. It never crossed your wildest dreams that you would find yourself being intimate with your husband in his office with only a wall separating the two of you from the eyes and ears of the executives, the staff, and most importantly, of Sera. What was going through Satoru’s head when he initiated sex with you? He was so eager to have you that he didn’t even care to wait at home.

Maybe, just maybe, you loved the desperation that he showed. It made you feel desired, wanted, and appreciated by your husband seeing as he was doing everything just to make sure that he was returning the sexual gratification that you were giving him. At one point, he had to manhandle you back on top of his desk, raising one of your legs up high so he could hit your most sensitive spot with the swollen head of his cock. The position allowed him to cover your mouth while he was plowing his member into you at a faster pace, so deep that he managed to release all of his thick semen straight into your cervix.

It was crazy to think that you were once a virgin who shied away from the idea of physical intimacy, often insecure about your skills in bed because you knew that some women were just far better than you ever would be. And yet, here you were, catching your breath on top of your husband’s desk as he planted a kiss on your spine before pulling your underwear up and lowering the hem of your skirt to cover you.

“I’m done for the day,” he announced, hoisting you up with one arm and sniggering as he saw you breathing roughly through your mouth. He didn’t even stay an hour long in his office before he decided to leave. “Get up, mommy.”

Heat permeated your cheeks. “I’m not pregnant.”

“You will be.”

You could’ve at least combed your hair and he could’ve tucked his shirt better because when you two dashed out of his office, you knew that most of the people were aware of what happened behind their boss’ doors. No one could really judge you for sleeping with your own husband except for Sera who was thankfully not anywhere in sight as you left the building together.

Somehow, why did things start to feel like a competition to you?

The mall was serene when you arrived, void of too many shoppers on a weekday because everyone else was stuck in whatever daily schedules that they still had. Going back to the mall reminded you of the day when Toji gave you a spark of inspiration to follow your dreams and start your own brand—providing you with an insight on how you could manage a successful business all by yourself. You haven’t given it much thought because you were still hesitant if your designs were worthy enough for the public, but each time the man crossed your mind, you could feel nothing but gratitude because he had become the blanket to your stormy days. His encouragement gave you a boost of confidence to believe in yourself without letting your insecurities swallow you.

From the last time you were with him, you couldn’t forget how the sales staff had mistaken you as his spouse because of how visibly comfortable you were around the Zen’in Group’s CEO. Whether it was the natural closeness or the undeniable chemistry, unfortunately, the innocent mistake now struck a problem with your actual husband who followed your tail as you walked inside the Givenchy store.

“Mrs. Zen’in, welcome back!” greeted the same lady who assisted you before.

You didn’t even get the chance to answer because Satoru became stiff at the name that you were addressed with, narrowing his eyes between you and the lady as if thinking if he had heard it correctly. “Say that again.”

“I’m sorry, sir…?” The lady was absolutely stupefied. You couldn’t blame her for being intimidated because Satoru could be extremely scary and domineering when provoked.

Sighing, you looped an arm around your husband and attempted to clarify the situation. “Satoru, it was a misunderstanding—”

“I’m asking her,” he sternly gestured his chin towards the lady, digging holes on her skull with the way his eyes bore into her, “what did you call my wife?”

“Oh, I’m… I thought she was Mr. Toji’s…” Her eyes widened in realization. “Oh, God! I am so sorry, Mrs. Gojou. I didn’t mean to.” The lady was desperate at showing how apologetic she was, even bowing in a full 90-degree just to let your husband know that it was an honest mistake and that she was never going to do it again. You had to be the one to tell her that it was fine and that she didn’t need to say sorry, soon facing your husband only to receive his frown.

“You wanna explain why she called you that?” he asked, clenching his jaws to signal his displease. You wondered why the thought of Toji seemed to ignite fire in his eyes.

“We just bumped into each other and then he helped me pick a suit, that’s all there is to it.” And with a lowered voice, you murmured, “I didn’t complain when you spent the whole weekend with your mistress.”

Despite being suspicious, Gojou couldn’t say anything more about your friendly encounter with Toji Zen’in because he was clearly too surprised by your audacity to make remarks about his unfaithfulness. What he didn’t like was how you called Sera, his one true love, a mistress. “Don’t call her that.”

You were guessing that he just didn’t want to make a scene as he willingly followed the sales staff towards the dressing room—the same staff handed you your husband’s phone and wallet while they assisted him in fitting the mohair suit that you purchased for him.

It was ironic how he ignored Sera this morning, but would defend her behind her back and you assumed that it was the opposite for you. If he could call you an attention-seeker, why couldn’t you call Sera a mistress? As apologetic as you were for unintentionally splitting them apart—the cheating, the hickeys, and her implication of you being the homewrecker to their relationship made up for all the factors that messed with your head in the worst way possible. When Sera requested for you to allow them to still see each other, you never exactly agreed. All you said to her was that you understood where she was coming from and that you felt sorry for getting in the way. You’ve already seen pain in their perspective and it was about time that they saw pain through yours.

The world must be playing with you because Sera’s name appeared on your husband’s phone as he received a text message from her. You weren’t one to snoop into his private affairs, but your curiosity won when you opened his phone to read the message.

Sera: I can’t believe you’d actually bring her here. I don’t care if it’s all for show. I’m not happy with it.

Your breathing ceased. Your face lacked color.

All for show? And here you were being a fool to believe that Satoru took you with him because he genuinely wanted to spend time with you. Truth was, he was only doing it to prevent Sera from being seen as the paramour that she was. Each time you let your guard down, you were always bound to be broken. You should have realized that the way of life around Satoru was to be constantly hurt by the lack of sincerity in his actions because how could he ever choose you over her? He was probably only partially grateful for the comfort you gave him when he had his nightmare, but if it had been Sera next to him, his kisses would all be meant for her.

You’re so fucking stupid, Y/N. The accumulation of tears made your eyes glossy and you had to keep them from spilling because Gojou no longer deserved them. He didn’t deserve all of you, forcing the thought in your head when you spitefully checked his photo album to see countless photos of Sera, even intimate ones, that he was storing shamelessly in his phone. There was only one photo of you out of the two-thousand that he had of her—it was of you standing under the Northern Lights, looking up at the night sky with a contented smile on your face. At that time, you were unaware of the revelation of who Sera truly was in his life.

It took you one click to delete your photo from his phone, locking the gadget back to its place just in time when your husband came out wearing the suit.

You couldn’t even look at his eyes when he showed you how perfectly tailored the outfit was for him. Every corner from his shoulders down to his ankles made him look princely in a one-million yen outfit. “You look great,” you simply said, finding your way to the mirror where he stood behind you with a satisfied face. While he became less hostile after wearing the suit, it was now you who displayed an apathetic visage from all the things you had seen on his phone.

“I like it,” he told you, grabbing you by the waist as he stared at you from the mirror. “Let me get you something in return.”

“No need. Just wear it for your dad’s birthday.” You drew in a deep breath, handing his phone and wallet back to him before you headed to thank the staff.

He seemed to notice the sudden change in your mood and he was aware that you were trying to avoid him because he spent the next hour glancing at your face wondering what he did wrong. He didn’t do anything wrong. He simply loved.

What was wrong in this marriage was you staying when all flags had no other colors but red.

Satoru was deeply bothered by how you were distancing yourself from him, again. He wasn’t dumb. He knew that you checked his phone and realized how you have read Sera’s new messages. The thing was, he wanted to tell you not to get the wrong idea. Showing you off was just a bonus to conceal his affair with her, but it was more so because he just wanted you around him in his office. The sex? That was not for show. He genuinely wanted it and he also wanted to tell you that he hadn’t really done it again with Sera ever since he got married.

Even with his reasons, his pride stopped him from explaining all of these to you. His head was nothing but a bubble of confusion because he was refusing to understand why he wanted to even redeem himself for you. He just couldn’t accept that he wanted to appease you. Satoru told himself that he wouldn’t care if you get hurt, that he wouldn’t care about cheating when he didn’t even love you—why wasn’t he feeling those same sentiments now?

But aside from his marital problems, he also wasn’t particularly happy when he saw his mother coming out of a car, dressed in a halter trapeze with her hair in a half-updo like how she usually did when he was younger. Tonight was one of the most important nights in the Gojou family as they were to celebrate his father’s 65th birthday at The Chateau where all of the most influential people in the business world gathered. The venue was overflowing with luxury that boasted of just how affluent the Gojou family was. The lavish banquet, the classical music, and the grandiose decorations in hues of white and gold一everything was an arrant display of power and wealth, something that his mother learned to despise so much that she left.

So, why the fuck is she here? Satoru had to keep it together when his mom walked closer to him, offering a hesitant smile as they met outside of the main entrance. He instinctively looked around for you and noticed how you handed your coat off to one of the personnels to reveal yourself in a sexy, brown Mugler dress that was made out of thick satin, cut generously to show a window to your cleavage. The dress fit like a corset that tightly hugged your curves, allowing a peek into your thigh from the side slit that would definitely attract every single man’s attention tonight. Gojou was going to lose his mind because you never showed him your dress since you two left the penthouse so he had no single idea what you had underneath your Burberry coat. He was not expecting that you would be wearing such a provocative dress at all.

He surely gaped at his wife, but remembered that his mother was only standing next to him and his irritance came crawling back. He found it twice as annoying how his mom even gasped at the sight of you. “My daughter-in-law, she’s drop dead gorgeous, isn’t she?”

“You have guts,” he scoffed at her, glaring without any remorse. “What brings you here? Don’t you hate all this extravagance that’s why you left?”

His mother showed her invitation card and held back a sigh. Just like you, she was patient at moving closer to fix the bow tie on his black Givenchy mohair suit. “Your father invited me out of Nana’s request,” she explained as she fixed her son’s collar, very similar to how you usually did it for him. “It’s been years. I don’t plan to hold a grudge on him for so long. We have reconciled.”

“Then you should know that I can hold a grudge for the rest of my life.” Satoru didn’t mean to be such an asshole to his mom, not when she meant the whole world to him for being his anchor and strength when he was younger. She was the first woman he ever loved, the only woman he treasured the most in this world if only she didn’t ruthlessly abandon him into the hands of an abusive father who tormented him by inflicting both physical and mental pain.

Satoru knew that he wouldn’t be half as fucked up as he was now if she stayed, and yet when he begged on his knees that Thursday morning a little over eight years ago, he remembered just how much it devastated him when the same mother chose to leave.

His mom recalled the memory like it was yesterday, that was why she tried to make amends by reaching out to her only son. “My son, I know you’re still upset with mom, but I had a reason—”

“Save it for someone who cares and get lost.” The son didn’t hold back from sending her a look so sharp it could kill. He didn’t even stay when he walked inside to meet you in the grand foyer where you talked to Ieiri who showered you with compliments for your chosen dress. With his mom around, Gojou was desperate for your attention to distract himself from getting angrier than he already was. “Hey.”

However, your smile faded when you looked at your husband who now had an arm locked around your waist. “Your mom’s here,” you strictly said, peering at your in-law. “Oh, Nana’s with her.”

Satoru gritted his teeth and refused to look back although he could hear Nana’s voice greeting his mother with familial warmth. “I don’t care,” he told you, wrapping a tighter arm around you. “What the hell are you wearing?”

“Oh, please.” Shoko let out a snort, following you two as you walked further inside the venue. “I bet you’re drooling over Y/N. She looks so good.”

Instead of blushing, you were forcing a smile. “I bet he’s not.”

“Well, he’s missing out.”

All three of you turned around to see Satoru’s best friend, Getou, dressed in a royal blue tuxedo that matched Ieiri’s one-shoulder sequined dress of the same color. If Gojou didn’t know any better, he would have assumed that the two were a couple.

“Ooh, matchy outfits,” you teased, beaming at your husband’s friends. It was baffling how you’ve smiled at everyone tonight except your own spouse. “You look nice, Suguru.”

Satoru’s brows had creased as he looked at you. “You have time to praise everyone but me?” He wasn’t throwing a fit but his friends sure sniggered at his sudden outburst of jealousy. No, he couldn’t be jealous. Why the hell would he be jealous? He was only annoyed that you’ve been disregarding him.

“You already know how good you look,” your reply was dull, but held his hand withal. You didn’t even take note of how he hasn’t taken his ring off for two weeks now. You were acting detached as if you were placing a wall between you and him, and Gojou certainly hated this version of you.

The tension remained even as all four of you entered the main hall to see the multitude of guests in fancy outfits as an ostentatious display of wealth. They were being served champagne by dozens of waiters and waitresses while they talked about their respective business ventures.

If Naoya Zen’in and his facetious nature was here tonight, Satoru was sure that the man would have already mocked whoever looked like a parvenu in his eyes. Though, for one of two things; none of the Zen’ins were invited because they were rivals, and there were no arrivistes in the party as all guests were born elites, aristocrats, and A-lists.

No one was nouveau riche except his step-mom who descended from the grand staircase with her bejeweled gown, fur scarf, and shiny diamond necklace. Satoru was disgusted at the sight of how the woman was trying hard enough to act like she belonged in the high society when she was and would always be a mistress-turned-wife.

The real woman to be respected in this party was his birth mom, but she was merely standing in one corner with Nana like the humble woman that she had always been. His mom was the first wife and should be given high regard, not the witch who faked her smiles towards everyone including him and his wife.

“Good to see you two,” said the woman, giving you a kiss on the cheek while noticing how Satoru didn’t want to greet her the same way. “Have fun tonight, okay? Your dad’s coming down in a bit. He’s still upstairs with Yuuta. You know how sweet of a son he is to him.”

Bullshit. This woman was making it seem like Satoru had never been a good son like his step-brother was. Yuuta wasn’t even related to him by blood to be acting like an ass-kisser.

As she left, Satoru knew that she purposely walked past his mother and ignored her presence as if she had all the fucking right to do so.

“Chill out.” Suguru was patting his back after noticing how hard he was breathing. The said best friend then handed him a glass of whiskey so he could just drink his frustrations out. “Are we still on with that Bora Bora trip?”

“Hey! I was gonna bring that up,” Shoko excitedly chimed in while you remained clueless next to your husband. “I’ve been working out just to get that perfect summer body.”

Satoru snorted, playfully. “No one’s gonna look at you, anyway.”

“Shut up, asshole. Are we taking your PJ or are we flying commercial?” she asked, sipping from her glass of champagne. “Y/N’s coming, right?”

You looked at your husband for answers. “Bora Bora?”

Shit. He hasn’t told you. “It’s uh, our yearly trip. We go there every year and spend a weekend getaway.”

Suguru’s eyes widened when his best friend traded looks with him. “Wait, don’t tell me Sera’s still going…”

Panic stretched across Satoru’s eyes. “Yeah, she’s—”

“I get it,” you interrupted as you concluded a theory in your head, “You guys always go with Sera, right? I don’t think I should go.”

Ieiri was full of concern when she looked at you, noticing how you scooted away from your husband. “Wait Y/N, you’re coming with us!” she encouraged. “It’s gonna be fun. I’ll be there and I promise you’ll enjoy the trip.”

Satoru, on one hand, pulled you back by wrapping an arm around your hips. “Yeah, you’re coming.” By pressing his lips on your ear, he whispered, “They’ll suspect if we don’t go together.”

You released a bitter scoff that mixed in with the glossiness of your eyes as if you were in complete disbelief that he was about to pull another Iceland on you. Still, you seemed to have agreed out of spite. “Sure, whatever. I’ll go.”

Later that night, you tried to spend as much time around Gen while Gojou was constantly being snatched by the elders that wanted to have a business-related conversation with him. You took notice of how he was being praised by your dad, claiming that Satoru was the perfect son-in-law and husband that he could ask for his daughter while proudly adding comments about his competency as an heir to the Gojou Group.

You could see Satoru glancing around every now and then to not lose his sight of you and you were so close to just dropping your cold act because it was getting harder and harder to resist him when he was now showing an ounce of affection. Frankly, you didn’t want to argue with him on his dad’s birthday but his constant insensitivity was getting on your nerves. The topic about the Bora Bora trip even amused you because you were aware that your husband only wanted you there so no one would have suspicions about your failing marriage. You didn’t want to think of how much chaos would ensue on a trip that had both you and Sera together, but you realized that you had to be there to finally give yourself an ultimatum if you could still stomach the idea of your husband loving another woman.

“Are you and Satoru fighting or what?” Gen sounded genuinely concerned with her question. “I was gonna say he can’t keep his eyes off of you but it feels like he’s bothered about something.”

Bothered because you’ve been indifferent to him all night? He made you feel that way since the day of your wedding and he couldn’t even stand the same treatment for five seconds. But for all its worth, you didn’t open up to Gen. “We’re fine,” you lied, changing the topic by mentioning your three year-old niece. “How’s Nina?”

“We got two nannies for her,” she answered, peeking at her husband who was engaged in a conversation with your dad and Satoru. “Nina said she wants a cousin.”

You chuckled, soon shaking your head. “She’ll have to wait for a long time.”

“How come?”

The owner of the voice was Nana whose arm was looped around your mother-in-law’s by the time they joined you and Gen in the cocktail table. Satoru’s mom even tucked in a few strands of your hair behind your ear and complimented you for looking absolutely stunning.

“I’ve been trying to live long enough to see my future grandchild,” Satoru’s grandmother added, eyes turning into crescents as she smiled.

“Nana’s right,” agreed by your mom-in-law, “I’m looking forward to seeing my son as a father.”

Right. While he still had issues to deal with, you doubted if Satoru was truly ready to be a dad and you just wanted to escape the topic of your pregnancy as it had so much baggage to unload. You couldn’t outright tell them your reasons for not wanting a child because it would require you to reveal the truth about your marriage with Gojou behind closed doors. Were they ready to hear that he has a mistress? Were they ready to hear that he was oftentimes mean to you? Ruining their image of Satoru was the last thing you wanted to do.

“We’ve been trying,” was all that you could say, “he wants a boy so…”

Thankfully enough, all attention had shifted into the man who was celebrating his 65th birthday tonight as he came down the staircase with his wife and Yuuta on either side, grinning at the guests and receiving their kind wishes before he began with his introductory speech.

“Thank you all for coming,” your father-in-law spoke with all eyes and ears on him, dressed in a custom-tailored Dolce & Gabbana champagne tuxedo as he stood high and mighty like a Chairman of the largest conglomerate should. “It’s my sixty-fifth year and I cannot wish for anything more than a happier life. I am in deep gratitude to have a beautiful, loving wife by my side and my son, Yuuta, who has just received an acceptance letter from Harvard,” his proud speech earned gasps of astonishment and a series of congratulatory remarks from the guests while he presented his new family in front of everyone, including his ex-wife and his eldest son.

Somehow, when your eyes found Satoru, you could see the immense pain and anger that he felt. The paroxysm of negative emotions that casted your husband’s face led you to believe that he was about to snap. Like a button ready to blast everything around him一he was close to letting his wrath overcome him until Suguru came to pat his back as a way of comfort. You didn’t know how much Satoru had been drinking but he didn’t stop himself from reaching for another glass of whiskey to drown himself with the hard liquor.

This was a nightmare for him. To see his father boasting about his new wife and son, to see the same father being insensitive to Satoru and his mom, to see the father having a wide smile on his face while overtly destroying the lives of his first family. For once, you wanted to eliminate your ill feelings for your husband just to sympathize with him because it was unimaginable to even think of the rage that enshrouded his mind.

“I am also very grateful to have my eldest son who has recently just married my gorgeous daughter-in-law, the heiress of the Creston Financial Group,” the old man continued, looking at Satoru who already had a face that was hard as stone. “He is doing a great job at running the company, probably better than I have in the last three decades. Watching him grow made me realize that the greatest gift that I have received is my family.”

You were not as surprised when Satoru left, storming out of the place because it sickened him to hear his father spouting the opposite of what he truly felt. You sensed his mom looking at him worriedly but couldn’t find the strength to chase after her son because of the fear that her presence would only ruin him more. Being his wife, you gave your mom and Nana a reassuring look before you came running after him with the hope that you could provide him comfort at such a distressing time.

Your heart ached because you would always find it in yourself to care for him. Satoru may value his childhood promises but you valued your marriage vows. To stand by his side through good and bad times, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health. To stay true to him and love him unconditionally for the rest of your days. This was your promise and the very reason why you stayed with him.

Whatever pain he was feeling, you shared it. You could feel the same gravity resting on your shoulders as you ran out of the venue to look for your husband after an arduous walk around The Chateau. You were already panting out of breath when you found him sitting on the trunk of his black McLaren car, chugging a whole bottle of scotch with inebriated, carmine eyes that glared at the night sky.

“Satoru…” You walked closer, placing a hand on his shoulder and trying your best to take the bottle out of his strong grasp. “That’s enough.”

He raised the bottle higher so you couldn’t reach for it. “Leave me alone,” he spat, eyes showing signs of intoxication. “Weren’t you avoiding me all night, anyway? You wanna leave me so bad, don’t you? You’re tired of me.”

You assessed the emotions on his face. He couldn’t even stand straight on his own. “Do you want me to call Sera?”

By trying to reach for his phone, he swatted your hand away. “Why would you一you’re my wife.”

“I am, but you need her.” And this wasn’t you being selfless again. This was you deciding what could be the best for him in a situation like this. “Come on, I’ll give her a call so you can go see her and she can take care of you.”

It caught you off guard when he slammed the bottle on the ground, leaving the glass shattered to pieces the same way his heart crumpled when you offered to let him see his lover. But what took your breath away was how he got up and glared at you, appearing as though he was hurt that you were pushing him away. “I don’t need her right now!” he snapped, “she doesn’t even give a fucking a damn about... about… Fuck this. She hates it when I open up about all my fuckin’ trauma because she’s already dealing with her own problems, you understand that? You understand how much that hurts me?”

So this was how it was for them. You never knew that you would ever see the day where he would willingly reveal all of these to you. Surely, it was liquid courage that allowed him to spill the ugly side of his relationship with Sera一the reality that he couldn’t be himself around her because she wanted him to stick to being the ideal man who could handle things perfectly on his own. Sera did not want to lose the image of Satoru that she created in her head, and as a result, it hindered him from showing his vulnerability around her.

A soundless sigh flew out of your mouth before you wrapped your arms around his torso, hugging him close and resting your chin on his shoulder. You could feel his heartbeat vibrating against your chest as you rubbed his back to soothe him from his outburst. “Okay, I understand you. I’m sorry. Let’s go home now.” After pulling away, you wiped his cheek. “Give me your keys.”

There were tears in his eyes, but he was strong enough to hold them in. “No, I’ll drive.”

“You’ll get arrested for DUI. It’s bad publicity for your company.” You heard him sniff as you reached for the key in his back pocket, successfully fishing it out until you heard heavy footsteps heading towards the two of you. When you turned around, you were greeted by the demon that was Satoru’s dad. He had nothing but a look of antipathy towards his son who was now laughing like a maniac at the sight of his father and his step-brother coming after him.

“What the fuck do you need now?” Satoru’s grin was absolutely terrifying. “You gonna brag about your new family again? In front of me and my fucking mom? You’re so insensitive, aren’t you? You even invited her just to show off. Fucking asshole. I hope this is the last year you’ll get to celebrate your birthday一”

You let out a gasp as Satoru received a harsh slap left a bright red mark on his cheek. “Dad, don’t!”

“Dad!” Yuuta had a look of horror bathing his eyes as he attempted to stop further violence to ensue, but their father had already latched onto his eldest son by gripping his collar.

“You dare make a scene in front of my guests?!” The father snarled at Satoru with eyes that pierced straight through his soul. “Get your act together, you bastard!”

Before he could lay another hand on him, you protected your husband by forcing yourself in between the two of them. “Dad, please stop,” you begged, feeling Satoru’s shaky hands around your hips to hold you close. You had to ignore the sudden tightening on your chest for the sake of your partner. “H-He’s drunk. I’m sorry, we’re leaving now. Please go back to the party.”

The old man did leave while giving Satoru one last look and something tells you that the damage could have been worse if you didn’t try to intervene. How could he hit his own son? It wrecked you when you looked at your husband to see him laughing humorlessly because violence had always been something that he received from the man that he called his father. He had to endure being the punching bag for years without the comfort of his mother.

With this in mind, your heart softened into mush.

“Nee-chan,” Yuuta called, stepping back as he worriedly looked at his older brother. “Please be careful on the way home.”

You must be a superwoman because you couldn’t imagine how you managed to drag your drunk husband home despite his mindless mumbling and wobbly legs. You couldn’t even bring up how you saw Sera’s lipstick in his McLaren because now wasn’t the perfect time to show your unreasonable jealousy. A broken man was hiding underneath his drunken exterior and all you could do was to mend the cracks in his heart before it worsened.

Surely, he wouldn’t remember half of the things that he did tonight and you were only relieved because he could at least numb the pain that he was feeling. Drowning one’s self in alcohol was the same thing you did when you were desperate to conceal your heartache, and with that, you couldn’t blame Gojou for being inebriated out of his wits.

What was difficult was dealing with an intoxicated man who weighed twice as much as you, refusing to take off his clothes as he plopped himself on your shared bed.

“Satoru, please cooperate,” you were pleading at this point as you unbuttoned his shirt. Your heels and his shoes were discarded on the floor as you sat in the corner of the bed, trying your best to remove his top. “You need to get dressed so you can sleep comfortably.”

The effects of the alcohol were only heightening now, half an hour since he chugged the bottle of scotch like an alcoholic. His cerulean eyes were blank and his lips were parted as he stared at your face for the next few minutes. It was a good thing that he wasn’t on the verge of throwing up, but you knew better that he was about to be extremely hungover the next day.

“I don’t want to,” he stubbornly responded, pulling you forcefully to lay on top of him. “Hey… You see… You see the w-way those dudes at the party looked at you?”

Sighing, you rested your head on his chest with your legs on either side of his waist and listened to his garbles. “Mhm, which ones?”

“I’m gonna fuckin’ kill them,” he huffed, lifting your dress so he can squeeze your bum. “Don’t th-they know you’re mine?”

You stopped breathing for a moment, refusing to be fooled by yet another round of his game of playing pretend. “You don’t have to act, Satoru. No one’s around.”

His chest rose up and down heavily while you listened to the beat of his heart knowing that it was beating for another. “What do you mean?” he scoffed and you looked up to see his frown. “This isn’t acting. You are mine.”

“Sure…” For all you knew, he was saying this now because he was intoxicated but he would be back to being a complete douche tomorrow.

“Y/N…” However, as the man embraced you tightly, you no longer had the strength to move away from his grasp.You were attached both physically and emotionally—that was the saddest part of it. “My wifey.”

Gosh. He was definitely drunk. You could even hear his chuckles after he called you with such term of endearment. “Yes, hubby?” you played along, tracing his shoulder blades as he slurred his words.

“Don’t ever leave me… okay?” He held onto you like a child would do to a stuffed toy. “Promise me you won’t leave like she did.”

You assumed that he was referring to his mom. “Satoru,” you raked your fingers through his white hair, “your mom had her reasons. I’m sure she feels awful but maybe you can give her a chance to explain her side.”

“I don’t wanna talk about that.” His long arctic lashes fluttered while his lids were falling heavy. “I just… wanna forget everything about her.”

You could see the ring on his finger when he took your hand and entwined them together. It was crazy how something as simple as hand-holding could turn your heart into a state of frenzy. “You hate her that much like you hate me?”

There was silence that filled your bedroom on this dead of night. Silence that made you believe that he had fallen asleep because your eyes were also nearly shutting on its own.

But when he spoke again, you had to make sure that you weren’t dreaming to hear his next words. “I hate you because you remind me of her.” The admission had your eyes growing wide. “You’re exactly like my mom… kind, regal, and caring. Arranged to marry my dad. Had to carry a child for the sake of having an heir.”

“Like us.”

“Yeah, like us.” You could feel him running his hand on your back, yawning as he hugged you more tenderly. “And I’m scared that… if I get attached to you… you’ll leave just like her.”

Do people mean it when they say drunk talks are sober thoughts? That alcohol amplifies the bottle of truth that a person has been keeping inside of them for so long? In vino veritas—you’ve read it once and it means that ‘in wine, there is truth’. Since Satoru was under the influence of alcohol, could these words really be his hidden thoughts?

You could already hear his light snore when you gave him a gentle peck on the lips. “Then don’t do things that’ll make me leave.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You thought that waking up to feel Gojou’s kisses on your shoulder was an extended dream.

When you opened your eyes, you realized that you were still in your brown Mugler dress while being spooned by the husband who still smelled like alcohol from the immoderate amount of hard liquor that he drank last night. Now the man was here, having woken up before you, feathering soft kisses on the crook of your neck as he snaked his hand around your waist.

He couldn’t still be drunk at 6 AM, could he?

“Baby…” Your voice was hoarse while you slightly turned your head to look at him. “Are you still intoxicated?”

His diamond eyes trailed down on your lips. “What happened to calling me daddy?”

Oh, God. You prevented yourself from blushing despite the heat that suffused your entire body. “What are you—”

You were cut off when he passionately locked his lips against yours, surprising you with a kiss full of ardor knowing that you were unaccustomed to receiving such affection. There was no way for you to read his mind but his actions showed you just how much he desired you. The gleam in his eyes, the hand that was moving to squeeze your bosom, and the lips that were moving in synchronization to yours were all and everything that sent trails of fire to your body.

Does he even remember the things he said before he had fallen asleep?

“Mmph!” you whimpered when he bit your lower lip, taking the opportunity to roll his tongue against yours while he worked on finding the zipper to your dress. His huge, manly hands were impatient and a groan left his mouth as he gripped your dress from the back and ripped it off. “S-Satoru!”

You were startled by the roughness in his actions, eyes widening to look at him in complete astonishment. There was nothing but a haughty smirk plastered on his handsome face as he sat up and unbuttoned the rest of his shirt, later throwing the garment on the floor. You were stuck in bed trying to process what was going on until your husband made you turn around so he could properly peel the dress of your naked body.

“I didn’t get to appreciate you in this dress last night,” he husked, kissing your bare shoulder before kneading your mounds from behind. His hot breath sent shivers to your spine as he whispered in your ear. “Take it off.”

Even if you were mad embarrassed, you still obliged and slipped the dress off your body while he also made an effort to rid himself of his clothing. You’ve seen each other naked countless times but you were always still shy and insecure around him. “You know I don’t like doing it in the morning.”

“Why?” he asked, tossing your dress to the floor before he pushed your back against the mattress. You were laying in bed with your legs closed until he forced them open so he could get in between. “You’re still shy?”

You avoided his eyes, too awkward to look at him. “N-No,” you gulped as you tried to laugh it off. The next thing you knew, he was pinning your wrist on either side of your head concurrently to when he latched his mouth back into yours.

His kisses were tender and deep, tracing the outline of your lips with the tip of his tongue as you breathed each other in. “No need to be shy,” his lips vibrated above yours, “We do this all the time.”

Twice a week. Thrice if he wasn’t busy. It was either before bed or in the shower before he would go to work. The excuse was always to ‘make a baby’ but sometimes you wondered if he was starting to genuinely like doing it with you. You were already deciding to tell him that he was never going to get you pregnant as long as you were taking birth control pills, but you were far too afraid to hear his reaction so you’ve decided to push it back once more.

As if the thought wasn’t already hurtful, your sadistic mind flew to Sera in the middle of a steamy make out session with your husband because you couldn’t help but remember the intimate pictures that she had in his phone. You were curious to know if he was careful enough to use a condom with her. How many times do they do it behind your back? Does he initiate it a lot? Does he tell her he loves her while he’s buried seven inches deep? Sera was ethereal and shapely with chocolate brown eyes and flawless ivory skin. You could imagine how much Satoru must love kissing every part of her body while she moaned for his name, telling him how much she loved doing it with him because in their eyes, having sex wasn’t wrong. It could never be a sin when she owned him from the start.

Because you were tortured by your own thoughts, you ended up pushing your husband off, pulling away from his kisses as unmistakable pain reflected through your eyes. “I-I’m sorry, I just…”

“What’s wrong?” he asked, moving your hair out of your face as he rested above you. You could feel his hard member brushing against your thigh while he gazed down at you in both worry and desire. “Look at me.”

You placed your palms on his chest, slightly pushing him away. “You and Sera do this a lot, don’t you?”

He was evidently annoyed by your decision to bring her up. “Can we not talk about her?” he questioned, leaning back in to leave open mouthed kisses along your jaw. “I want you, right now. I didn’t get to have you last night.”

You want me right now but tomorrow you’ll want Sera? You wanted to ask the question out of spite but became too distracted when he suddenly crawled lower to attach his mouth on your left breast. He sucked the rounded mass, squeezing it with both hands before swirling his tongue around your nipple. All that you could do was let your hand grab a fistful of his hair until he moved to your right breast to give it the same attention. “Nng. Y-Your teeth—”

You could feel his mischievous grin because his teeth grazed your skin, too late when you realized that he had his fingers doing circular motions against your clit. “You’re so wet already,” he claimed, stretching your labia apart and sliding his fingers between your folds. The moans that left your lips were embarrassingly loud. “I should have done this to you in your dress last night.”

“Y-You ripped it—aah,” you mewled, digging your nails on his back as you watched him lowering himself down. He was smothering you with soft kisses around your chest, stomach, and down to your inner thighs. By spreading your legs further apart, you could feel his mouth moving closer and closer to your cunt until his tongue found its way to delve into your slit. Holy shit. Was this how it feels to receive oral? “A-Aaah! S-Satoru—!”

He was parting the lips with his fingers so he could do a better job at lapping his tongue inside of your core, sucking your juices in and allowing the squelching noises to tickle your ear like a sweet melody. “Fuck,” he cussed under his breath. “You taste so good.”

Your nails were digging onto the duvet, desperate to hold anything as you stared at the ceiling of your bedroom. You were seeing stars as your husband did more by flicking his tongue on your nub, soon replacing his mouth from ransacking your sweet pussy as he palmed your whole genital with a cocky smirk. “Mm—!”

“Say you want me.” His eyes were condescending and lustful as you hoisted yourself up so you could rest your back on the pillow. Your husband had a cock that was too big for someone who had very little experience. Looking back on your first night, there had been major progress from the way he was treating you in bed with much more affection and allowing you to get used to the burning stretch that his length and girth would bring every time he buried himself inside of you.

By choice, you were desperate to have him now, too. “I-I want you…” You wanted to arouse him the same way he did with you. You wanted to please him better than he could do to you. You wanted him, all for you.

“Good.” Gojou was satisfied with the wanton look that shined in your eyes when he leaned in to give you a peck on the lips before he positioned his tip on your entrance. He didn’t immediately thrust it in, and instead, pleased your pussy by grinding his head against your clit. His shaft slid with ease between your folds, lubricated by your slick before he teasingly slapped your cunt with the length of his cock. He erupted into a snigger as he saw the look on your face. “I’m going in.”

You always found it funny how he would warn you when he was ‘going in’ because Satoru seemed like a guy who didn’t care if you were unprepared. Still and all, the preparation allowed you to hold back a moan, breath hitching as soon as your husband penetrated your cavern and warmed his cock with your velvet walls.

Both of you moaned at the same time as he lowered himself down to press his body against yours, intoxicating you with the skin-to-skin before he connected your lips back together. “Mmph—! A-Aah!”

“Ah—shit.” Satoru didn’t restrain his groans this time around. He got a little too excited at slamming his cock inside of you, forcing you to feel every ridge as his shaft with every hard thrust. His breath smelled of whiskey but you didn’t mind having him leaving marks on your neck as your nails scratched his back. “I can fuck you day and night and not get tired.”

The statement made your thoughts run wild. “D-Daddy!” And you weren’t expecting that word from leaving your lips each time your husband managed to hit your g-spot. He was visibly turned on with it, pulling away to kneel and continue rutting into you by holding your waist. Your breasts bounced wildly from the roughness of his thrusts.

“You like daddy’s cock?” He grinned like an idiot, gaze animalistic and overflowing with lust. With your legs stretched apart, he could see how your cunt swallowed the entirety of his dick, all red and swollen because of his size. He decided to make your moans louder by pressing his thumb on your clit, rubbing the sensitive button while jostling your hips at a better rhythm.

“Mm—yes! Please… m-more,” you begged like the submissive wife you were, grabbing one of your breasts and squeezing it with your hand. Gojou went absolutely nuts at the view. “H-Hard and fast.”

His eyes glinted with a predatory gaze as if the request elicited his dirtiest thoughts. “Mommy wants it hard and fast?” Soon enough, his playful smirk was back. “Come here.”

You didn’t initially understand his instruction when he hooked his arms under your legs, suddenly carrying you out of bed while you held onto his neck for support. Where’s he taking you? His cock temporarily left your hollow core as he made his way towards the window wall that had the best view of the Tokyo skyline. “What are we…?”

“Trying to conceive a boy.” His smile was impish when he pressed you against the glass wall and made a haste move to sink his cock back into your cunt. “Gen said this position works best.”

Dammit, Gen. How does Gojou not get shy talking about stuff like this with your older sister of all people? You never thought that your husband would follow her advice and make love to you while standing up, pressing you against the glass wall and ensuring that he was going balls deep inside of you.

And as requested, the way he fucked you was hard and fast as you glided against the wall like a ragdoll. The increased roughness and speed in his pace caused you a shockwave of intense sensual gratification that sent you to seventh heaven. The moans and the salacious sounds that came from his rough pace drowned your room with a surge of euphoria because Gojou never once stopped from plowing your cunt with his hardened member, deepening and hitting your most sensitive spot each time he penetrated you.

For the first time, Satoru was sincerely looking at your face, muttering the words, “you look pretty,” while he was chasing his climax.

“A-Aah! I-I’m g-gonna c-come,” every word that escaped your mouth came out in a hushed voice. The skin slapping noise resonated through your four walls each time his pelvis collided against yours. “So c-close—!”

“Fuck. Fuck, yeah.”

“Satoru, I can’t hold it in—!”

“Then cum,” he ordered, having you crying out his name as he watched you disintegrating from the intensity of your orgasm. You were creaming all over his cock while he continued to pleasure himself with your sweet pussy. “That’s it… Good girl.”

You were still recovering from your high when Gojou decided to pull out at the last minute, putting your legs down and forcing you to get on your knees. “W-Why?”

Docile like a rabbit, you watched him as he placed his cock at the same level of your face so you could wrap your hand around his shaft. You did your best to finish the job by pumping his length, soon filling your mouth with his cock as you bobbed your head back and forth, using yourself as a suction to his throbbing member. You looked up to see him throwing his head back and closing his eyes because you were seemingly doing great at sucking his dick.

“Can you swallow for me?” he asked, and as you released him from your mouth, you nodded obediently. “Open your mouth, show me your tongue.”

How does cum even taste like? You got your answer when your husband jerked himself off and released warm spurts of seed on your mouth—some of it splashing on your cheek and on your chest. It was messy but you couldn’t forget the taste of it being bitter, sweet, and slightly metallic. You swallowed the white liquid, much to your husband’s approval before he pulled you up and kissed you with gratitude.

For a moment, you were both catching the breath that you’ve lost until Satoru decided that it was a great idea to tease you. “You have my cum on your face,” he jeered, lifting your chin with his index finger. “I should take a pic and use it as my lockscreen.”

You swatted his hand and looked away, ashamed. “Stop,” you whined, pushing him towards the bathroom. “Go get me a towel.”

“Fine, stay here.”

There were butterflies in your stomach as you looked back at the intimacy that you just shared with your husband because these were rare moments and you treasured every bit of it. These times allowed you to think that you had a normal marriage and that all other outside factors didn’t affect your relationship like what reality has shown you.

It started as a nice day, but got ruined when you saw the notification on Satoru’s phone signaling an Ovulation Alarm when you just had yours a week ago.

Curiosity could truly kill a cat because when you unlocked your husband’s phone, the cycle was not made to track yours but none other than his mistress.

Sera.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

#gojou satoru x reader #gojou satoru x you #gojou satoru angst #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru angst #gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo angst #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk angst #jjk series

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wwinterwitch · 2 years

Note

hey there! i was wondering if i could request a wade wilson x avengers fem reader? i love wade and the deadpool franchise so so much!! thank you :)

tysm for your request, this is my first time writing a deadpool fic but hopefully it's not that bad lmao

THE GOOD AND THE BAD - DEADPOOL

summary: your team allowed you to bring your boyfriend along for a mission...now they deeply regret it

pairing: wade wilson (deadpool) x avenger!fem!reader

word count: 1K

warnings: language, flirting, fluff, wade's a goof but a softy only for you, tony slander lmao, not proof-read

a reblog is always appreciated :)

my masterlist

"So...at which part of the plan we do that superhero group pose you all love to do?"

No one said a thing after that comment. The same thing happened every time Wade would open his mouth. You simply sat on the seat next to him, knowing everyone were already tired of hearing him talk.

They never really got to meet this mysterious boyfriend of yours before the mission. All they really knew is that he existed and he has been dating you for a few months.

When you told them he was in the superhero business (mostly), they even suggested he could try to join the Avengers. You knew right away the idea would repulse Wade, so you had to tell your team he liked to work on his own to avoid telling them the truth. Even when Wade thinks, as he once put it, "the Avengers are slightly less annoying and lame than the X-Men", you doubted he would ever want to be part of this team.

Still, he agreed to join you on a mission. Wade mostly agreed to get to spend more time with you, since you've been a lot busier after becoming an Avenger. He'd constantly make fun of you for being a superstar now, teasing you about the interviews, ridiculous outfits and terrible hero names.

"You've got to be kidding me!" he exclaimed one day. "A guy literally calls himself ant-man?"

"Well, he can shrink," you shrugged. "What else did you expect?"

"Your whole team is ruled by the biggest capitalist in the whole entire world and he can't get y'all a manager or publicist, or something? Someone that can come up with better names?" he insisted, shaking his head.

"Your best friend literally calls himself Spider-Man."

"Yeah, and his name sucks too."

"We don't actually plan those," Peter replied to Wade's question in an attempt to make the situation less awkward.

"Oh, of course you don't," he muttered sarcastically, leaning back on his seat. "Ugh, this looks like a very expensive plane, did you lost all the budget before you could buy comfortable seats?"

Tony heard that comment and turned to look at you, trying very hard not to roll his eyes. "Where did you find this guy again?

"Uh, a bar?" was all you could come up as an answer, knowing he wasn't exactly asking that.

"She was drunk, I was drunk– we had greaaaaat sex that night, and have been together ever since."

"How about we keep quiet until we get there?" Natasha said this time, hoping she could get to end the conversation.

Lucky for you, no one else said anything. Wade leaned closer to you and whispered, "I hate this people so much already. The redhead with anger problems and the patriotic blondie over there are hot tho."

"Nat and Steve?" you whispered back. "Yeah, I thought the exact same thing when I first met them."

"But you are definitely the hottest Avenger."

"You say that because you're my boyfriend."

"No. I say it because I have excellent taste," he corrected. "Besides, I'm pretty sure I saw a few posts on Tumblr that agree with me."

You laughed at his comment before leaning closer to him, resting your head on his shoulder as you snuggled closer to him affectionately.

All jokes aside, Wade loves when you show him any sort of affection. He likes physical affection the most, but he can't deny he enjoys when you tell him how much you love him or when you would surprise him with romantic dates or awesome gifts. Sometimes he can be a little insecure, so it's nice to have you around to remind him he's deeply loved.

He immediately wrapped an arm around you as you got more comfortable. A thing you loved about him was his ability and willingness to give you as much as he receives from you. It's the little things and gestures he only does for you that make you fall harder for him every day.

To the outside world he was this annoying, loud, mediocre, never-takes-anything-serious type of guy, but to you he was much more than that. You got to know the soft, caring, honest Wade Wilson. The one that would stop doing whatever he's doing to come home to you if you're having a bad day. The one that treats you like you're the most precious thing that has ever existed. The one that would do anything to keep you safe and make you happy.

So yeah, he was an annoying asshole with an incredibly dark sense of humor who says and do lots of questionable things. But you love him just like that, and you wouldn't change a thing.

"Okay, listen up," Steve said after a few minutes, catching the team's attention. "We'll be landing soon and we need to go over our plan again."

He turned to look at you first. "You, Nat, Clint and Kate stay back to cover the entire perimeter– remember to stay hidden. Tony, Wanda, Vision, Rhodey...you're in charge of any incoming attack from the air. Bruce, Wade, Peter, Thor and I will be at the centre of what will definitely be a very heated battlefield, so we'll need help for you guys hiding nearby," he continued. "Stay on your positions, work together and good luck. Questions?"

Wade immediately raised his hand. Steve sighed. "Yes, Wade?"

"What was everyone's names again?"

"Green monster, blue-white-red boy, hammer and spider are on your team," Tony snapped, exasperated. "Try to help them."

"Got it! Why aren't you the one in charge with the speeches?"

Tony slightly nodded at the same time as Rhodey tried not to laugh. "Never though this moment would come but I agree with you. Thanks."

"Oh, you're welcome," Wade replied.

"Guys, please focus," Steve interrupted.

You grabbed Wade's glove-covered hand, giving it a light squeeze before letting him go. "Looks like you've made a friend," you joked.

"If only he didn't embody absolutely everything I hate about our system," he says. "I bet he's pro life, too."

"You think I'd work with him if he was?"

"Fair enough," he nodded. "I'm gonna miss you out there."

"Me too, but remember we have a date when all of this is over."

"Yup. And remember the one who kills the less amount of bad guys has to pay for dinner."

"Meaning, you."

"Don't claim victory just yet, honey," he quickly replied, starting to load his guns. "Remember how much I hate paying for food."

#wade wilson #wade wilson x reader #deadpool x reader #deadpool #wade wilson fic #marvel #marvel mcu #deadpool fic #marvel fic #mcu x reader

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watchmegetobsessed · 3 years

Text

PAPER-THIN WALLS

a/n: i woke up totally in themood to write just straight up smut... and that's what i did lmao. there's not much plot in it, just a whole lot of fucking, so enjoy!

pairing: Bucky X Reader

warnings: sexual content, unprotected sex, oral, the good stuff

word count: 3.8k

masterlist

The Avengers compound was built almost perfectly with its luxurious suits, several entertainment rooms, fully equipped training areas and millions of hidden snack and drink bars all across the building. But the stress this time is on almost.

Bucky was never sure if the walls were originally built to keep less noise than in any other buildings, or if it was just his super hearing that allowed him to catch conversations and noises that weren’t meant for his ears. He would often hear gossiping agents as he walked down the hallways, or Vision and Wanda talk about recipes and TV shows in her room and there was this one time he heard Nat and Bruce have a discussion that was surely not meant to be heard by anyone but the two of them. He is still trying to get rid of the words he heard.

Having a room next to yours, he often sat on his bed, hearing you shuffling around, humming to yourself. As the latest addition to the Avengers, you felt a little out of place at the compound, like you were a stranger to the team even though they never gave you a reason to think so. This feeling of not belonging is what brought you closer to the century old super soldier on the other side of the wall, who despite being free from the claws of Hydra finally, still felt like an outsider in the superhero filled complex. Bucky always thought he was hard to make friends with, but he had to realize that it was all about who he was trying to make friends with. Because with you, it was an instant, like he had known you his whole life, you’ve definitely become one of the closest people to his heart in a very short time.

With this friendship came some undeniable feelings and tension from Bucky’s part. He couldn’t help but fall for you, how couldn’t he? He would have been surprised if it didn’t happen, after spending so much time with you. He found himself craving your presence, to be with you, talk to you and listen to you at the same time. He was a sucker for your lame jokes that he would laugh at even if they weren’t that funny. He loved your enthusiasm whenever you brought a new book and basically told him the whole plot, spoiling the story, but he never minded, because the way you rambled in excitement made up for everything.

And of course, he has been attracted to you since day one. Even when you weren’t that close, he couldn’t deny how much it affected him when he saw you spar with Steve at the gym in just some tight shorts and a sports bra, or when you linger around in the kitchen early in the morning wearing only an oversized shirt and your underwear hidden under the long fabric. It stirred his fantasies that’ve been sleeping for decades and late at night, when he was lying in his bed restless, his vibranium hand firmly curling around his erection, he thought about you. How you’d taste and feel, what it would be like to have your body pressed against his, his name falling from your lips in a whimper as he pleases you all over and over again. Sometimes he felt dirty after an elaborate fantasy, barely able to look into your eyes, but he just couldn’t help it. You had him in the palm of your hand.

What he doesn’t know is that he is not the only one with fantasies and desires. Because on the other side of the wall, you’ve often found yourself craving the mixture of warm and cold touch from flesh and metal hands, toned muscles flexing under your palms, pink lips whispering into your ears as you arch against his body… Bucky has been living in your mind rent free and you’ve been having a hard time containing your desire for the super soldier.

Having sex dreams is not at all a new thing for you. It happens every once in a while, waking from a heated scene only to find yourself alone in the comfort of your room, a thin layer of sweat coating your skin as you try to bring yourself back to reality. It was never an inconvenience, but in the past few days it’s been getting worse. You’ve had a wet dream for three days in a row, jolting awake right when you were about to climax, a wave of disappointment washing over your body as you fisted the sheets in your sweaty palms. And the worst part? All of them have been about Bucky.

It’s another sleepless night for Bucky, nothing new. He has tried to chase himself into sleep with everything already, TV, ready, music, even counting sheep, but nothing seems to be working, so he is left with lying in his bed, staring at the blank ceiling, the soft bed sheet throw across his naked upper body, only wearing a pair of boxer briefs, because it’s been hot these past week, but he is not a fan of using the air-condition. The dogtags are lying messily on his naked chest, his vibranium finger playing with the wrinkles of the sheets mindlessly.

His eyes slowly flutter closed, a promise of some rest finally nearing the corner, but right just then, he hears some muffled noise coming from the other side of the wall. His eyes snap open as he sits up, trying to make out what it is, but he catches no words, just… grunts and some shallow panting, as if someone was struggling.

What if you’re sick and something is wrong? You’ve been a little worn off the past days, maybe something was lingering in you.

Kicking the sheets off of himself, he pads his way to the door, his bare feet tapping on the hardwood floor as he walks out of his room, heading to yours, stopping at the door. Pressing his flesh hand to the door he takes a moment to listen to the voices so he can make out what’s happening, but it really feels like you’re in a struggle, but he has no idea why. Knocking lightly on the door he hopes to get an answer, but nothing of sort comes and he stays still, debating whether he should go in or just leave. Right when he is about to retreat he hears you gasping, as if you’re at a short of breath and it pushes him to check in on you.

Opening the door he pops his head inside, the darkness fully taking up the room, your king sized bed in the middle, a few strikes of moonlight sneaking through the curtains that are not entirely drawn.

“Y/N?” he calls out softly, not wanting to startle you, but no answer comes once again, however he can see your figure tossing and turning under the sheets, another gasp slipping through your lips.

He walks closer, stopping at your bedside, seeing how your eyebrows are pulled together tensely, chest heaving as you keep moving around. Bucky feels like an intruder, you’re definitely asleep, probably having a nightmare, but he is not sure if he should be in here. Should he wake you? Or just leave? Would you be mad if you found him here upon waking up? After some hesitation he decides it’s better if he leaves, but right as he turns around, taking just one step towards the door, he finally hears a word from you.

“Bucky,” you whine, his name coming out a little slurred, but still clear to him. “Bucky, please!” you continue, his eyes widening as his head snaps around, eyes returning to you. You’re still asleep, but he notices your hand moving down your chest and then disappearing under the sheets, between your legs. That’s when he realizes that it’s not a nightmare. You’re having a sex dream about him.

Clearly trying to chase your release, your lips part as you moan, the voice instantly making Bucky’s cock twitch while hardening. His hands curl into fists as he is fighting himself whether he should do something or leave, but when his name slips through your lips again, he goes feral. He would be damned if he lets you get stuck in your dream when he can please you in real life.

He finds himself striding back to your bed faster like ever, like an elegant lion, hungry for his prey as one of his knees sink into the mattress between your open legs, keeping his weight up on one arm while the other finds your waist. The shirt you always sleep in has ridden up to just below your breasts, the exposed skin watering Bucky’s mouth as he squeezes your waist gently but firmly enough to wake you from your fever dream.

Your eyes snap open and you stare up at him slack-mouthed, your brain barely able to process the sudden change between the Bucky in your dream and the one holding himself up above you in real life.

“Bucky? I—“ you breathe out, the cloud of confusion on your head making it hard to even form a sentence. He leans down, his face just inches away from yours and even though it’s quite dark, his blue eyes are basically piercing. His dogtags fall to your chest, right above your wildly racing heart and you wonder if he can hear the pounding in your ribcage.

“Shh, I’m gonna take care of you,” he whispers and without a warning, his lips crash down onto yours.

It’s so hard and passionate, filled with hunger and longing, the air gets knocked right out of your chest as you eagerly kiss him back while he slowly moves himself until he is fully between your legs, his hips coming down to meet yours and you moan when you feel his erection pressing against your already soaking wet core. Your hands find their way up into his hair, grabbing a fistful of it and he can’t stop himself from growling at your action, grinding himself against your hips, both of you desperate to take it further.

Pushing himself up into a kneeling position, he grabs your panties and tugs them down your bare legs, throwing them across the room before he rids you from your shirt as well, so now you’re lying completely naked in front of his lustful eyes. He could devour you with just his icy blue eyes, he looks glorious, towering above you with his broad, muscular shoulders and toned chest, you’ve never been more desperate for a man before.

Your desire takes action, pushing yourself up your lips meet his chest, kissing the hot skin, your tongue sloppily pressing against him as you make your way up on his body. His vibranium fingers tangle into your hair as he holds the back of your head, pulling you up to kiss you again, both of you in a kneeling position while your hand reaches into his underwear, palming his hard cock, feeling up his size before you push the fabric down and he kicks it off easily, his erection now pressed between the two of you teasing and tempting you, making you buck your hips forward just for the slightest friction.

“Were you dreaming of me, doll? Huh?” he questions, his lips nibbling on your lower lip as he takes it between his teeth and gently tugs on it.

“Yeah,” you breathe out, hands grabbing onto his hips before they move down to his bare ass, pulling him closer to you, earning a moan from him.

“And what was I doing in your dream?” He kisses down your neck, stopping at a soft spot before he starts sucking and biting on it, marking you as his, something he’s been aching to do since the moment he laid eyes on you for the first time. Your brain almost shuts down, one of his hands is on your jaw, keeping your head in place, while the other one is gripping your waist harshly, his fingers digging into your muscles. You fail to answer his question as just a whimper leaves your lips at the sensation.

“Words, sweetheart. Use your words for me, will you?”

“I, uhh—You used your f-fingers,” you croak out, a satisfied grin tugging on Bucky’s lips at your words.

He pushes you back on the bed, making you lie on your back as he gets on top of you once again, but this time he doesn’t stay like that long, after a hard kiss he climbs down until his face aligns with your core, his hands parting your legs widely, baring you to him fully.

“Tell me, where did I use my fingers?” he hums, face so close to your center that you can feel his hot breath on you. He teases you, running his hands up and down your spread thighs, his fingers just grazing your folds before moving away every time.

“Bucky, please!” you cry out, grinding your hips up, but you only reach his chin before he leans back with a pleased grin on his face.

“Just tell me and I’ll do it. Where did I use my fingers?” he repeats.

“On my pussy! You fingered me!” you groan, your cheeks heating up from the blunt comment you just made, but it’s exactly what Bucky wanted to hear.

Two of his fingers find your clit easily, starting off with slowly drawing circles on it, stimulating your nerves and it’s nothing like in your dream. You curse under your breath when his fingers move to your hole and he pushes both of them inside, his lips taking their place on your clit.

“Oh fuck!” you groan in pleasure, your hands immediately snapping to his head, fingers lacing into his chocolate locks as you shamelessly grind against his face.

Bucky is not a man of many words, but god damn, he can use his mouth like a fucking master. It feels like your whole body is on fire, you’re sweating and shaking, his fingers curl inside you every time he thrusts into you and he is stroking that one heavenly spot inside you that makes your eyes roll back into your head. His tongue is slick and sloppy against your wet pussy, but he is drinking it all up as if you were his last meal before death.

“Shit, I’m gonna cum! Bucky!” you gasp as your back arches at the sensation, your orgasm building up rapidly.

“Cum on my tongue and fingers, let me make your dream come true,” he growls against your heat, picking up the pace of his fingers which completely throws you over the edge.

You come with chanting his name over and over again as you ride your high, thighs shaking and tightening on either side of his head until you’re finally able to catch your breath.

Bucky pushes himself up, his lips glistening from your juices and you watch him wipe his mouth with his fingers, licking them afterwards like he just finished eating a chocolate cake, a satisfied grin on his ridiculously handsome face. He crawls up on you until his lips can finally reach yours again, kissing you in a slower pace, but still with a lot of passion to offer.

“Tonight wasn’t my first sex dream about you,” you slyly admit, lips brushing against his as you speak.

“Oh, yeah?”

“Mhm, so there’s more to act out.” His still hard cock twitches again and you’re fast to reach down and palm him again, wrapping a hand around him as you give his cock a few lazy stokes, but it surely has an effect on him.

You’re quick to turn him over, pushing him to lie on his back as you straddle him, steading yourself with holding onto his waist, his eyes bore into yours intently and your mouth hangs open when you grind against him, his hard cock sliding between your wet folds.

“The other day, I dreamed about riding you, your cock filled me up so good, but right when I was about to cum I woke up,” you tell him, not sure how this sudden confidence came from, but you just can’t help yourself. Bucky growls at your words as his fingers dig into your thighs.

“Then let’s make up for that, love,” he breathes out and you nod eagerly, lifting yourself up just enough to position him to your hole and then you sink down as far as you can, his dick filling you up inch by inch and your breath hitches when you finally settle, his length fully buried inside you.

“Oh, fuck!” you whine before you start moving yourself up and down his cock, grinding back and forth, the feeling of him inside you so intoxicating, you think for a moment that this might still be your dream. If it is, you hope you don’t wake up this time.

Though your training has strengthened your legs so you are able to ride him in this position longer, it still tires you out. Bucky notices when your movements slow down, his hands running up your torso, kneading your breasts before they end up on the back of your neck, pulling you down so you lie on top of him, his strong arms wrapping around you. His lips kiss the side of your head before he starts thrusting up into you, doing the work for you this time. You can’t stop yourself from moaning and whimpering as your second orgasm is starting to build up, your senses are on the edge.

“Fuck, Y/N, I’m so close,” he gasps, his thrusts becoming a little uncoordinated and you feel the same way, only moments away from your climax.

You push yourself up, pulling him with you, wanting to take back control before you both reach your relief, you get into a sitting position that allows you to grind in his lap, moving your hips back and forth as fast as you can. Bucky’s lips find yours again, kissing your sloppily before they travel down your neck and he licks at your collarbone as you hold onto his broad shoulders.

“You feel so fucking good, oh God!” he whines, his head falling backwards as you keep moving, both of you sweating, but neither of you really cares, you’re just relentlessly chasing your high again.

“I want to feel you cum. Please, Bucky!” you beg him, squeezing your walls around him, the action completely maddening the man as he holds you to his chest and flips you over with ease, his body weighing down on you as he starts fucking into you fast and hard. You could throw a fuss about how he took control again, but you don’t mind it, not at all. Because the way he pounds into you, his cock disappearing to the last inch inside you with each thrust, your whole body starts shaking as your orgasm finally reaches you.

Your squeeze your walls again around him and the moment he hears his name fall from your trembling lips he cums inside of you, filling you up entirely, marking you with his pleasure.

He rides his high with a few more sloppy thrusts until he stops, his forehead falling against yours as you both try to catch your breath. He captures your lips in a soft and slow kiss, so different from the ones you shared before. Then he finally rolls off of you and you let out a displeased grunt when you feel him slide out of you.

For a while it’s just the silence in the room mixed with your soft panting, but he is the first one to break it as his head rolls to the side, looking at you with those fucked-out eyes of his.

“How long have you been having these dreams?” he asks, turning to his side so his hand can spread out on your naked stomach, fingers drawing tiny circles on your sweaty skin.

“A while,” you admit.

“I wish I heard you earlier through the wall,” he chuckles, but your eyes widen.

“Wait, what? You heard me through the wall?”

“Yeah. Thought something was wrong so I came over to check on you.”

“God, I must have been really loud,” you laugh, covering your face with your hands, but he is quick to peel them off and leaning closer he kisses your lips gently.

“Don’t blame yourself, these walls are like paper. And besides…” A sly smirk tugs on his lips as his hand comes up to cup your jaw, his thumb running along the line of your bottom lip. “I fucking love it when you’re loud.”

“I wasn’t even screaming yet,” you tease back, your comment definitely catching him off-guard, but he likes it.

“We’ll get there next time.”

You and Bucky walk into the kitchen in the morning, completely oblivious to the rest of the world, still in the bliss of last night. Nat, Tony and Steve are sitting at the kitchen island, sipping on their morning coffee when you emerge from your room, all eyes immediately glued to the pair of you.

“Well, good morning, everyone,” you chuckle a little nervously, not sure what the stares mean.

“Morning,” Nat smirks, shaking her head before she turns back to the newspaper unfolded in front of her.

“Nice of you to make an appearance, I have some news to share with you all,” Tony announces as you pour some coffee for yourself while Bucky grabs everything he needs to make breakfast for the two of you. Nodding you signal to Tony that you’re listening. “I decided to do some remodeling on the compound.”

“Oh, what are you getting done?” you ask, wondering what could possibly need work on the building.

“Nothing major, I’m just gonna make the walls soundproof, so we don’t have to listen to you guys fucking all night long.”

You almost choke on your coffee at Tony’s blunt comment, cheeks heating up right away, you were not expecting that. Though he is looking at you and Bucky, who is now standing behind you with a hand on your waist, with a stern expression, you can see the small smile hiding in his eyes. He finds the situation rather amusing instead of annoying.

“Yeah, next time maybe keep it down a little,” Steve suggests as he stands from his seat, grabbing his mug. Walking past the two of you, he pats Bucky’s shoulder however. “But I’m glad you guys are finally getting it on,” he comments before walking out, Nat and Tony following him right after, leaving just you and Bucky in the kitchen.

You glance up at him with concern in your eyes, teeth sinking into your bottom lip, but he doesn’t seem to be ashamed at all. Instead, he leans down, pecks your lips shortly and then whispers:

“I told you. Paper-thin walls.”

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

#bucky #bucky barnes #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes blurb #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x reader #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x you

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kaitsawamura · 3 years

Text

would you like to stay forever?

SUMMARY⎮ Sparring with Pro Hero Kirishima Eijiro in his private gym at his home doesn't seem like a bad idea if you don't count the fact that you really, really like him.

STATS⎮ minors do not interact, 18+ ⎮ Rating: M (for mature) ⎮ WC: 5525 ⎮ Pairing: Pro Hero Kirishima Eijiro x Fem!Reader ⎮ Tags: Aged Up Character(s), Friends to Lovers, Sparring, Smut, Fluff, Age/Experience Gap (if you really squint) ⎮ AO3

NOTES⎮ Thanks to @spacelabrathor for listening to me scream about this and to @some-kindofgnome for fueling my Kiri fever dreams. Yes, that title is based on a Mulan quote. This whole fic was based on THIS POST and Kirishima seemed like the perfect character for this pwp. Hope y'all enjoy! (Also please for the love of God, click on the banner to see in HD if you’re on mobile, it looks so much better lol)

It was Saturday and even though you’re on your way to becoming a Pro Hero, you can think of several things you’d rather be doing with your one day off than going to Kirishima Eijiro’s house to spar. But here you are pulling into his driveway, going over combat moves in your head as if your life depended on it. They weren’t really serving their purpose which was to distract yourself. Kiri had offered up his personal gym, encouraged you to stop by with one hand in his pocket and the other rubbing the back of his neck as if he was nervous.

A couple of his friends had already taken him up on the offer. You were the only one he’d offered who hadn’t come over yet. He had texted you a couple of weeks later saying he was starting to take it personally… and then immediately texted with a laughing emoji just to clarify he was only giving you a hard time. It brings a smile to your face now as you remember it. Yesterday he had also clarified it would just be the two of you if you were self-conscious sparring in front of other people. You’d have the whole place to yourselves. Like that should mean something. Which it did. It does , you realize with butterflies growing in your stomach. Kiri doesn’t need to know that though.

The two of you had been toeing around something since you had been hired at Fatgum’s Agency a year ago. Neither of you had made a move. Kirishima, the Red Riot, was a big Pro Hero and while you took pride in your quirk, it didn’t hold a coin to some of the others you’d come in contact with. It had surprised you when Toyomitsu had brought you on. But he had mumbled something about “liking your spunk” and that he thought a teleportation quirk would be a useful one to add to his agency. The first day you had shown up, Kiri had immediately caught your eye. Not for the obvious reasons. Obvious reasons being the fact that he was climbing the Pro Hero charts or the fact that he had a dynamically interesting quirk or that at twenty-five he was already built like a brickhouse.

Those were all valid reasons, yes, but what had pulled you in was his smile and his genuine interest in you outside of your quirk. But he was just like that you had quickly discovered. He knew everyone’s coffee order and what they liked for lunch. He knew when to push and when to back off. He knew when to talk and when to listen , knew when he still had a lesson to learn. The kids flocked to him. Even now you’re still entirely convinced that’s actually his quirk, getting people to like him. It’s not a difficult thing to do though.

Your brain stutters back to the present when a text notification pings from your cell phone as you sit in Kiri’s driveway, picking at non-existent lint on your gym shorts. The cute ones you’re still convincing yourself were your only clean pair and that’s the only reason you wore them.

KIRI : i saw u pull up, u gonna come in or what 😂

Had he been waiting for you to get there? You tapped out a quick response, one that hid the little flip in your stomach at the thought: creeper, you were watching for me lmao

Response bubbles immediately flash on your phone screen but you’re angling out of your car and shutting the door before he can reply.

Somehow, this house fits Kiri perfectly. It isn’t big. You had seen pictures of other top-ranking Pros’ houses. Enji Todoroki’s house, for example, was fucking ridiculous. But even without a massive floor plan, Kiri’s house is nicer than any you’d been in for some time. Clean, straight lines and lots of windows. In fact, you can see straight through the floor-to-ceiling windows out to his backyard when you reach the front door. Is that a pool ? Kiri had tons of fun showing pictures at the agency; it was a well-deserved investment for his already multiple years of service as a Pro. The pictures hadn’t done the place justice though.

Kiri comes to the door, throwing it wide open with a huge grin that shows off his sharp teeth. You ignore the way your mouth goes dry as he drags you in, babbling on like an excited little kid at you actually coming.

“I really thought you were gonna back out! I mean, that would have been fine, of course. I just can’t see the point of having the whole place to myself all the time.” He’s irresistibly cute, walking around showing you the living room and the kitchen and pointing out to the backyard where, yes, there is indeed a pool. “You can come over any time and use that too if you want!” You thank him, warmth pooling in your stomach at how incredibly nice he is.

“Uh, we should probably get in the gym. I have… stuff to do later,” you finish lamely. You don’t have anything to do later but very quickly you’re realizing how far out of your depth you are here. The familiar beginnings of the head over heels fall is washing over you in steady waves. But you’re coworkers and the thought of coming to work every day and having to see his adorable face and not doing anything about it is almost making you nauseous.

“Oh, yeah, it’s just down the hallway,” he rumbles, leading the way and you follow trying and failing miserably to calm the nerves flashing through your veins. You’re here alone with Kiri , the man you’ve been crushing on since you’d started working with him a year ago. And now your stupid brain isn’t just thinking about what it would feel like to run your tongue along his teeth or how his hands would feel between your legs. No, your stupid brain is thinking about what Kiri looks like when he first opens his eyes in the morning.

Your one-track mind is not getting any help, especially when Kiri walks through the doorway of the gym addition and immediately proceeds to pull his shirt up and over his shoulders and tosses it to the side. Shit. His back muscles ripple with the movement and when he turns to face you, it’s heart-wrenchingly obvious that he has no idea the effect he’s having on you. He has to know . Doesn’t he? From your end, it seems wildly obvious that someone as good-looking as him should know .

You glance around, eternally grateful for the fact that the gym is also attractive. Floor to ceiling windows span two of the walls here as well and there’s a large set of French doors leading out to the yard. You find yourself actually in awe when you get a better look at the landscaping. It’s so green . There’s a small patch of lawn but the rest is just artfully arranged native flora and fauna. Violets, tulips. Huge hosta plants. And cherry trees heavy with their signature sakura blossoms.

“Kiri, it’s beautiful!” He comes to stand beside you, looking out the French doors as well.

“You like it? I guess it is pretty nice, huh?” You glance up at him, your chest expanding on a lurch looking at his smile. You’d never noticed before but he has a light dusting of freckles across his nose.

“Yeah, really nice.” You look out again, letting the silence grow until it feels like the most comfortable thing in the world. After what seems like an eternity Kiri clears his throat, rocking back on the balls of his feet. “What are you thinking for today?” The question leaves your lips and you’re immediately regretting it; your stomach flips again when Kiri looks at you like you’re prey.

“Close combat, hand-to-hand combat. You did mention a while ago you wanted to strengthen that, right?” You throw your head back, rolling your eyes, and groan. The two of you make your way to the center of the mat.

“Yeah, I mean, I’d be scared to take me on too,” Kiri says, large hands on even larger hips. He isn’t as tall as some of the other heroes at six foot three inches but he’s wide , thick. You know for a fact you couldn’t wrap your arms around his waist and have your hands meet. He’s wearing the biggest shit-eating grin you’ve ever seen. The sharpened points of his canines are out and on prominent display. Famous last words you think as a snarl erupts on your face.

“I’m not scared , Kiri. I just don’t want to wear you out . You’re a Pro Hero. You’re on the job a lot more than I am. Plus, you’re getting kind of old. Is that a little gray I see coming in?” Kiri bares his teeth even more but it’s not lost on you that he quickly reaches up to rake his fingers through his hair. There isn’t any gray, obviously , but the thought has Red Riot distracted. Distracted enough that when you plant your feet and your fist connects with his face, your knuckles hit skin and not the reinforced rock of his quirk.

“ Shit.” Kiri takes a step back, reaching up to cradle his jaw. His tongue swipes out to lick at the blood on his bottom lip. His vermillion eyes find yours and if you didn’t work with him on a regular basis, you would have felt fear at this moment. You know he wouldn’t hurt you but even now, a thrill races through your veins like electricity. He looks as if he’s going to devour you. You take your own step back, readying your quirk, reaching out to it as your fists hold their position in front of your body. A dark chuckle spills from his chest as Kiri calls on his own quirk.

Now it was your turn to be distracted; you had always been fascinated by Kiri’s quirk, the way his body looked when it hardened up. The ripples of muscle still visible under the toughened skin. The divots and ridges and how they mapped their way across his shoulders and chest and abdomen. You knew how it felt to the touch in fake combat. The Fatgum heroes all took pride in maintaining a healthy routine; sparring was a common workout that was previously done at a local public gym. You wonder absently what it would feel like to touch him slow and at the moment. When you could give extra attention with extra time.

Kiri closes the space between the two of you at the moment your mind strays and you barely are able to teleport out of the way to avoid him crashing into you. You try to take a swipe at him as you materialize from in front of him to behind but this time he’s ready for you and he’s using his quirk. Instead of moving out of the way, he plants his feet and allows your punch to hit. Pain radiates up through your fingers and wrist. It always irritated you that you had to prepare yourself to strike Kiri when he was using his quirk. Otherwise, you’d be in for a whole lot of hurt every time you landed a punch.

Teleportation is a pretty handy quirk. It gives you a pretty good advantage the more you work on your close combat skills. The trick with Kiri was to keep going at him until he ran out of energy. You hadn’t gotten to that point yet; your quirk had its limits as well. You were only two years out of UA, Kiri was out by seven. His strength was already fairly unmatched; sparring with him was always good practice. You relish the thought of the day you can win a sparring session without tapping out. It surges through you like pure energy.

You teleport to stand in front of him again, shifting your weight into your hips and up through your right hook. This time your fist connects with Kiri’s side and he lets out a small grunt. Your fingers don’t hurt so bad this time and by the time Kiri is retaliating, you jump back a few feet. He hmms, a sound that reverberates from his chest.

“That’s all well and good but how do you expect to do anything if you jump that far away?” He lunges forward at a running start, leaping at the last second, sending his gloved fist into your stomach. You were fast, but still not always fast enough. You double over, the air rushing from your lungs and your pre-workout protein smoothie threatening to exit back the way it went in. Sweat is already beading on your brow and sliding under your tank top. You take a few breaths through your nose when an idea pops into your head; you stay bent over. “Hey, I didn’t hit you that hard. You good?”

Kiri comes to stand in front of you, leaving him vulnerable. He can’t see your smirk until it’s too late. You wail on him, using some of the basic combos he’s taught you before today. Satisfaction rolls through you when he actually takes a step back. But then he puts his arms up in front of him, clenching his abdomen and bending inward to protect his core. He drops just a fraction and before you realize what’s happening, he’s swiping his leg out to push through yours. You watch in slow motion as you see his laughing face then the ceiling of the gym as you flip and land on your back.

If you thought you were out of breath before… “Fuuu-.” It’s a wheeze that feels like it’s ripping your chest open. You’re seeing stars. Kiri stands over you, hands on his hips again. You stare at his face; the hero has his hair pulled back into a bun. You snort, rolling your eyes. Why does he still look so fucking good? The sweat has caused some of the pieces falling out of his hair tie to curl. His hair has curl to it? You’ve never noticed before, considering he always gels it into spikes. You like the curl. “Are you--are you gonna help me up, or what?” It was still painful to talk.

Kiri tilts his head to the side, just slightly, and crosses his arms. “I’m thinking not. Last time I let down my guard you got those good combos in.” You stare in stunned silence, sitting up so you’re supported by your elbows. Kiri shifts slightly and if you didn’t know better, you’d say he’s backing up to… get a better view.

“Is that any way to treat your student, Red Riot?” You know you get under his skin when he clicks his tongue against his teeth and holds out a hand with a begrudging eye roll. He pulls you up with ease, quickly enough that you almost lose your balance, swaying into his space. You look up, eyes moving back and forth between his.

He draws in a breath and drags his bottom lip between his teeth. “First of all,” he says as he places his hands on your upper arms, “I’m not your teacher. I’m not that much older than you. Secondly,” he mutters as he tucks a stray lock of hair behind your ear, “our relationship isn’t that formal is it?” He’s so fucking close. This is getting dangerous. Dangerous because Kiri is within kissing distance. Dangerous because this gentle side of him is making you lose more breath than falling on your ass. Dangerous because the thought of Kiri taking you on the floor right now is almost too much to bear.

So you fall back on what you’re here to do. Fight. You flash him a wicked smile before rallying your quirk and teleporting a few feet away. His hand is still raised in mid-air and when his head whips to look in your direction, his crimson eyes are narrowed and his nostrils are flared. He laughs and rolls his neck, dancing on his toes.

“Okay. I see. I’m not gonna go easy on you, you know?” You snort and put your fists up in front of you again.

“As if you were going easy on me before, Kiri. Bring it on.” He smiles, the sharp points of his teeth enough to make your thoughts swerve again before you bring them under control. “Bring it on,” you whisper more to yourself as you brace for the fight.

Two hours later, you feel the strain in your muscles. Your quirk is running low on reserves and you know you won’t be able to use it much more. Kiri looks like he hasn’t wasted a breath but you can see he’s getting tired in the way his feet don’t move as sharply. And if the length of time he’s using his quirk is any indication to his state of mind, you know the two of you will be calling it a day soon. But you’re also both stubborn. And you’re dying to get one more good move in on him.

The cockiness the two of you had at the beginning of the sparring session hasn’t gone away but has burned hot into determination. No more smiles, only clear-headed concentration. The two of you are an arm's length from each other, throwing various punches and switching quickly between using your quirks and not. You’re breathing hard, sweat gathering at your brow as you throw another right hook that Kiri easily blocks.

“Get out of your head. You can be too predictable sometimes.” He doesn’t mean for it to come across as rude but the words strike a match to a guttering fire. You bare your own teeth at Kiri even though they aren’t sharp and probably don’t look nearly as threatening but it helps you feel powerful nonetheless. You drop without a second thought, lowering to your palms and sweeping your leg out in front of you in a wide arc. A grin spreads across your face when your calf meets Kiri’s ankle. He’s too physically dense for this move to work if he had seen it coming. But he doesn’t. And his solid 220 pounds of muscle falls hard.

You allow yourself the satisfaction of the moment for only a split second; Kiri’s recovery time is much shorter than yours so it isn’t long before he’s scrambling forward. He goes straight for your wrists to subdue you but with a smirk, you realize in his haste he’s put himself in the perfect position for you to possibly gain the upper hand. You scoot up away from him just enough to drag his arm forward and swing your legs around his neck. Then you elevate your hips and lock your core.

It’s over from there as you squeeze with every last ounce of strength left in your body. It doesn’t take long for him to tap out. You release as soon as you feel his loose hand tap your arm; he collapses over you and you’re too tired to move away or push him off. Now his breathing is rough and you feel a surge of pride. You reach up and place your hand on his head where his bun has come undone; he’s so heavy but it doesn’t feel bad. In fact, the feel of Kirishima resting his head and upper chest on your stomach is feeling nothing short of good . He’s still between your legs and suddenly the air is crackling with a new kind of energy when you gently comb your fingers through his hair.

He rises up, his hands on either side of you. His hips rest between your legs; the mingled heat radiating from both of you is almost more than you can take but there is no way you’re going to move anywhere. He leans forward, so close you can see the flecks of burnt orange in his eyes. If you moved forward just a little, you could close that space between you. He leans down more, his mouth right next to the shell of your ear.

“Maybe not always predictable. You did good today. Probably some of the best fighting I’ve seen from you so far. Keep it up.” He grunts, a shift of his hips allowing the curve of his cock to brush against your clothed sex through his gym shorts. He stiffens in what you think might be embarrassment. “Shit, sorry, let me just, uh--” The stuttering mess he becomes right before your eyes makes something lurch in your chest; you reach for his face without thinking.

“Kiri,” you whisper, rolling your own hips against his. His cheeks are burning a shade of red almost as vibrant as his hair. You bring up your other hand, holding his face between them and bringing him down to settle over you once more. Your lips meet his; he seems to war with himself for just a moment. A suspended second in time. But then he gives in, slipping his tongue against yours in a delicious sliding vision of what’s coming.

He reaches between you to slip his hand under your tank top; his hand is big and nearly encompasses your side. But it’s warm and gentle. Gentle. Who would have guessed that Red Riot could be so fucking gentle? But he is and when his hand moves lower to slide below the hem of your shorts, you give yourself to him with no reservations. His middle finger passes through the mess of your sex; a hissed breath rattles through his chest as your back arches on a ragged groan.

“ Shit. You’re so wet .” He slides his finger back and forth, gathering your slick on the thick digit. He takes his hand away and you mewl. “Can I?” He asks breathlessly as he hooks his hands on the hem of your shorts. You nod, eyes half-lidded. He pulls them down along with your underwear and the way he looks at you, at what’s between your legs, you don’t even have the wherewithal to feel self-conscious. Adoration. It’s the only word you can think of and it makes you wonder if you’d made a mistake waiting so long.

He’s on his knees when he takes your legs and drapes them on either side of his hips; this time he doesn’t hesitate in slipping his finger into your cunt. You nearly see stars just from that and if one finger is any indication, you’re in for it. Slowly, he adds another, his hand pumping into you in a steady rhythm. You’re grabbing for the ground, grabbing for him as a strangled noise pushes from your throat. He reaches out with his other hand to splay it across your sternum and it’s the only thing anchoring you as he adds the third finger before scooting down to put his mouth on your clit.

“ Kiri,” you keen, shoving your hips into his touch, frantically scrabbling for his wrist that’s on your chest just to have something to hold on to. He’s done this before, he’s had to. He’s too good. Too fucking good. Already there’s coiling in your gut as incomprehensible words tumble from your mouth. “Shit. Shit. Kiri I’m--I’m gonna--” He rumbles approvingly against your clit; the vibrations send you closer and closer to the edge and when it crests, your back arches near pain as you cry out, your voice echoing in the gym. It’s deep, roaring through all of your limbs but Kiri keeps going, fingers still pumping, tongue still swirling around your sensitive nub.

Another orgasm breaks over you sharp and quick and the overstimulation has your legs quaking as your arousal gushes over Kiri’s hand and tongue. But then he’s moving again, and you’re blearily aware that he’s shoving his own shorts and boxers past his hips to free his cock. You stare as it bounces back to sit near the planes of his stomach; it’s already leaking steadily with precum. Kiri looks back at you and when your eyes meet, you dart your tongue out between your lips to wet them. Another time, maybe.

Kiri leans forward to lift you up and the closer you get you can barely see any red in his eyes; his pupils are blown, his nostrils flared as he lifts you like you weigh nothing . He could snap you like a twig. But he won’t. You know without a doubt this is the safest you’ve ever felt, even as he lowers you slowly over his cock and it does feel like you’re being split .

“ Fuuuck…” You wrap your legs around him, your mouth dropped open, your hands gripping his shoulders. You try not to dig your nails in but it’s almost impossible with how you’re being filled. You knew Kiri was big but this was almost too much. His forehead drops to yours as he pants. But he’s not moving, won’t move until you tell him to. It makes your heart ache and your cunt floods, drunk on the affection thrumming through your veins. You roll your hips experimentally and the friction is bliss. “Oh fuck, ohfuck.” You move again, pushing yourself up and back down, listening to the hitch in his breathing. “ Kiri, please, ” you whisper. Those words… they’re enough.

Kirishima grips you by the hips, his fingers splayed and digging into the flesh; it’ll leave bruises and the knowledge cracks through you like electricity. Let him leave marks. Let him leave them everywhere. He’s moving you up and down his cock, grunting, mumbling. “Tell me, Kiri, tell me.” His eyes meet yours again and his own mouth drops open.

“Fuck, you’re so good. S’ tight. Jesus, I-- ” Kiri moves his hands from your hips to support you as he lays you down on the floor of the gym. The idea should be questionable but it’s not, it’s fucking not and you can’t concentrate on any other thoughts when Kiri grabs your wrists and pins them gently above your head with one hand while the other comes back to your hip. He thrusts into you at a brutal pace but… it feels like home and you think in that moment as your cunt begins to seize around his cock that you would give up forever to continue touching him.

“Yes, Kiri, yes. Right there, right--shit yesyes yes. ” He pistons up, the veins of his cock rubbing just right and when he releases the grip on your hands, they’re moving to wrap around him on instinct. He’s planting kisses along your jaw, mouthing up to your lips and back down to graze his teeth over your pulse point. “Do it, fuckin’ do it, let them know ‘m yours, ” you slur and when he bites down you crash over the edge on a groan that’s really more of a scream. Everything goes black but you're cradling him to you as his movements become more erratic. The snapping of his hips is getting sloppier by the second and a steady growl punches from his lungs with each breath. “Cum, Kirishima, cum inside me.”

He’s never heard those words before and it lights a fire in his veins. His head is buzzing and then he can’t hear anything as his cock releases and he’s spurting searing hot ropes of cum into your cunt. He goes until you’ve milked every last drop from him and he’d be lying if he said his world didn't suddenly feel whole. Finally, his body settles and his chest drops to yours. Everything slowly bleeds back into focus and somehow, everything seems more colorful than it did moments before. You’re still clinging to him.

“Kiri. Kiri, babe, I can’t breathe,” you say and he slowly rises, taking in your blissed-out expression. Your eyes can barely stay open, your cheeks are flushed. He backs up to see his handiwork on display, hyper-focused on the trail of the mingling cum dripping from the mess of your sex. But you’re smiling. Lazy and tired, completely at ease. “Wanna take a shower?” When you nod he doesn’t hesitate in standing to kick his underwear and shorts the rest of the way off his legs and then he’s grabbing you, scooping you into his arms and against his chest. He pads out of the gym and across the hall to his bathroom where he deposits you on your feet, only after he’s sure you can stand and only long enough to turn the shower head-on.

He puts his hand under the water, waiting for it to get warm. Steam billows from behind the glass door when he’s turning back to you to remove your tank top and your sports bra. Thank god you chose the front-closure one today; you didn’t think either one of you wanted to struggle to get one up over your head right now. When your breasts spill out of the high-impact fabric, you notice with tender amusement that his cock is half-hard again. His eyes go dark again and he leans in for a kiss. But it's slow and sweet.

"You're so fuckin' beautiful," he whispers. He ignores his arousal, ushering you into the stream of water. Your care is the only thing that matters to him right now. The heat slides across your body, and when Kirishima steps up behind you and begins soaping up your shoulders, it feels like heaven .

You take turns washing each other until you’re both blissed out in a different kind of way and the only thing either one of you can think about is sleep. But the afterglow is fading and doubt is creeping in. When you step out of the water, you stand awkwardly as Kiri hands you a towel. “You okay?” He’s actually concerned and you can’t put your finger on why you’re so fucking grateful for it.

“Yea, just tired. I should, uh, probably get going.” Kiri freezes and you think you’ve said something wrong, already crossed a line. Your brain is like a broken record as the stomach-curdling image of having to see him at the agency flashes across your eyes in vivid detail. But then he’s stepping into your space and pulling you in for a hug. A hug.

“Don’t go,” he whispers into the crown of your head and it has you smiling like an idiot against his chest. His skin smells clean and warm with a hint of spice. You bury your face further in as you nod against him. Then he’s leading you to his room, to the king-sized bed. He peels back the comforter and the white sheets and pulls you in beside him. Your back is against him and he hooks his foot around your ankles, bringing you even closer.

He doesn’t say anything more, just lets out a huge sigh as he wraps his arm around you. The last thing you notice before your eyes flutter shut is how your heartbeats are thumping at the same steady rhythm.

Late afternoon sunlight slants in Kirishima’s bedroom window, creating interesting patterns across his blanket. It’s pushed towards the end of the bed, your legs intertwined and tangled in the sheets. He’s still dozing, his breathing not quite that of someone sleeping but not of a person fully awake. You reach out to cup his cheek, stroke above his eyebrows, caress his lips with your thumb. A contented sigh leaves his chest as he grabs your hand and kisses your wrist. His eyes are open now and he watches you. You smile at him, snuggling closer, not wanting the moment to end.

“Hey,” he says quietly, suddenly serious. “I just want you to know, I don’t do this all the time. I mean, I’ve been with other people before but I don’t… I don’t really hook up .” Things start clicking into place as you realize what he’s trying to get across. He just fucked you stupid in his personal gym and somehow he looks bashful. And because you love it, you’re not going to help him along. You just watch, biting your lip to keep from giggling. “I just. I guess what I’m trying to say is I like you. I’ve liked you for a long time. And normally I would have wined and dined you first but... Well. Here we are. Would you like to stay for dinner?”

That’s the last straw; your laughter comes bubbling out of you and Kiri is leaning back to look at you with a quizzical expression on his face. “Is something funny?” That just makes you laugh a little harder but the confused look he’s wearing has you leaning in to press your lips against his.

“I’ve liked you from the first day I met you, Kiri. I’ll one-up your offer and tell you that I might like to stay forever.” A grin rips across his face and your heart blooms with warmth and affection. The world seems full of possibilities but none of them matter except for the possibility laying right in front of you.

#kirishima x reader #kirishima eijiro x reader #kirishima eijirou x reader #kirishima eijiro #kirishima eijirou #pro hero kirishima #red riot #kirishima smut #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #kaitsuki writes #oh my god i had such brain block #writing this one #because i get too in my head writing smut #BUT i hope everyone still enjoys #we stan kiri in this house

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luv-leni · 3 years

Text

Stray kids reaction to you saying “I hate you” as a prank

Warnings: swearing, excessive use of emojis because I have no self control

Enjoy!!!

Chan

Mmm depends on how u say it

If ur like I hate u 🤪

Then he’ll laugh and say “no u don’t silly”

But if ur like “ugh I hate u 😒”

Oh no channie feels so bad

He doesn’t even know what he did but he doesn’t want u to be upset :((((

He walks over to u and back hugs u trying to get a look at ur face

Ur looking away from him because ur trying not to laugh but channie just thinks ur upset :((

“Baby what’s wrong :(( are u okay :((“

This is too much for u and so u double over laughing with ur hand covering ur mouth

because of ur position HE THINKS UR CRYING NO 😭

this is where he freaks tf out

He crouches down in front of u in a panic

Only to see ur in fact not crying but laughing at him

He stands up with a relieved but frustrated look on his face

“You idiot!! You scared me!”

Poor boy omg give him kisses for the heart attack u just gave him

10/10 hilarious prank if ur a good actor

Minho

Deadpan stare

He does not care lol

He just keeps eye contact with u blinking slowly for like 5 minutes

If he’s eating he just maintains eye contact while putting food in his mouth

Bro ur so embarrassed 😭

U walk away from him and he just goes back to what he was doing

He’s so lame lmao

When u get over being embarrassed and sit next to him he’ll pat u on the shoulder and call u an idiot

Says this nerd 🙄

Changbin

Uh 🤨

Bitch u better take that back rn

He’s ready to fight u

He stares at u for a minute then stands up and walks over to u

Bro it’s kinda intimidating so u start laughing nervously

He’ll reach u and just be like

“Oh u think that’s funny?” while he tickles the life out of u

He will not stop until u tell him u love him

Even then he might tickle u extra for good measure

Yeah playing this prank on him doesn’t go well for u

It goes great for him tho

He gets to hear ur pretty laugh

Hyunjin

WHINE WHINE

Sorry did u not hear me WHINE

He’s such a crybaby if u so much as make a mean face at him he’s filing divorce papers

When u say u hate him he goes ???

Then he goes through the stages of grief

First he’s like “Yah! You did not just say that!”

Then anger “How dare u!!”

“Take it back rn!!! 😠” bargaining

Then depression “Wahhh why don’t u love meee :((“

Finally he reaches acceptance and at that point ur doubled over laughing at him and he’s like “ur pranks are unfunny now say u love me”

He’s a dramatic idiot please forgive him

Jisung

I-😮 you-🥺

^^exact representation of his facial expressions when u tell him u hate him

First he is shocked that u said that

Then he is pouty

Because how could u :((

Ji pouts at u for the rest of the day

Even if u apologize he doesn’t care ur still getting the puppy eyes

He follows u around the house not saying a word only 🥺

Ur gonna have to smooch his entire face before he leaves u alone

And then he’ll tell u ur terrible at playing pranks :)

Felix

🥺🥺 part 2

He looks so sad :((

It’s a 50/50 chance he’s not actually sad and is just messing with u

He gives u his best puppy eyes and pouts

“Whaaa? No u love me hmph!”

Lmao he launches himself at u and doesn’t let go until u say u love him

Tell him u love him rn!!

He gets so giggly at u and ur prank

When u say u love him he gives u his ^◡^ face

He’s so cute

Seungmin

Big toothy grin at u nd ur antics

He knows ur not serious because ?? look at him he’s so pretty no one could ever hate him 💅🏻

So he just kinda grins and opens his mouth a bit (yknow the look he does when one of the boys gets on his nerves? Yeah that one)

He gets playfully frustrated at u and grabs u around the waist forcing u against his chest

He says he’s not gonna let u go until u take it back

And u don’t take it back so he keeps holding u

Then he squeezes the hell out of u so u say u love him

“Ow ow! Fine I love u 🙄” < u

“Yayyy 😁” < him

So damn cute I hurt

Jeongin

:(frowny face:(

He just looks up from as phone at u like :(

That’s the only face he makes during this prank

U start laughing at him and he frowns even more

“Bby I was kidding!” U say trying to fix his face 😭

He just looks back at his phone still frowning

U skip over to him laughing and give him a little side hug as an apology

He just kinda rolls his eyes and pats u in the arm before going back to what he was doing

Pretty entertaining

#fanfic #stray kids #stray kids scenarios #stray kids reactions #stray kids imagines #stray kids fluff #skz imagines #skz reactions

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piecksz · 3 years

Text

in another life.

pairing: eren yeager x fem! reader

wc: 1.7k+

warnings: season 4 spoilers, just a shit ton of angst like idk what the hell i was on when i wrote this

summary: eren comes to find you the night before he leaves for marley, but when he forces you to think of a future without him, you’re not sure you can.

a/n: i actually forgot i wrote this lmao it’s just been sitting in my docs all lame n shit bc i didn’t like it at first but i read it again and i’m not mad at herrrr!! kinda contemplating a second part that reflects on reader n eren’s flashbacks when he comes returns to paradis and even heavier angst bc i’m evil >:)

You lolled your head forward, allowing heavy beads of water to cascade down your back, hot and ample as they soothed the rigid muscles of your shoulders and arms. You wiped away at your closed lids with wet hands before opening your eyes to watch as pearly suds gathered at your feet then disappeared into the drain.

There were two types of tired: one that could easily be alleviated with sleep or a brief pause for the body to restore its stability, but there was another that required much more. The type of tired caused its person to teeter on the edge of their sanity, silently wishing for nonexistence because sleep simply wouldn’t suffice. That was an insidious type of exhaustion that plagued the soul and the mind, and it was the type of tired that wasn’t habitual or biological, no human was made to endure its weather. You knew that kind of fatigue all too well.

You stood up straight, sputtering out small mouthfuls of water before turning around to wash away the rest of the lather that lingered along your skin. Once you faced the open-ended entrance of the shower stall, you recoiled backwards, nearly slipping on the slick stone beneath your feet if it hadn’t been for the way your arms reached out to seize the wooden panels on either side of you.

“Jesus Christ, you scared me.” You released a quivering but relieved laugh. It had only been Eren, but his footfall had been quiet, you hadn’t even heard him enter the bathroom at all. Standing sheepishly, you surveyed him as he shuffled toward you until he met you under the shower’s head. Long wisps of his brown hair grew black with saturation, and you smiled as they stuck to the sides of his face and the bridge of his nose. Heavenly.

Your eyes did their best to refrain from wandering down his bare form, as tempting as he was. The water surged over his head and down his muscle-bound torso, and you didn’t taunt yourself by looking any lower than his hips. “What’s so important that you couldn’t wait until I got out?” You reached up, allowing a few tender fingers to graze through the sleek tips of his hair. “Or are you just trying to be a perv?”

You smiled and relaxed your hands on his chest, although he had just stepped foot under the heated water, his skin was immediately feverish to the touch, and at first he made no efforts to embrace you in return. He did nothing but look on at you with reticent eyes, dark and brooding.

“Eren?”

Then he reached his arms out, weaving them around you and pressing your wet body to his damp skin.

“What are you doing?” You chuckled lightly. Eren had hugged you numerous times before, but never like this. Something about his touch felt restless and urgent, and his muscles were unrelaxed. He didn’t have to tell you explicitly before you discerned something was odd about his gesture.

His chin rested atop your head, and his long hair shrouded your vision like a thick curtain. “There wasn’t enough time for all the things I wanted to do with you.”

You dug your palms into his chest forcefully, doing your best to jostle him backwards until you could see his face once again. He squinted at you through doleful eyes, eyes that had once held verve and spirit now belonged to a dejected lover, missing the usual warmth he could deliver through a mere gaze.

“What are you talking about?” you asked, eyebrows creased in the middle. The humidity and swelter of the shower was prompting you further toward lightheadedness. You swayed on unsteady feet and did your best to focus on Eren’s face through the thinly-veiled mist. “Eren, quit it. You’re really scaring me now. What are you talking about?”

“After we’re free, what does your future look like?” Eren’s question carried as though he was reciting a sad song, a sorrowful lullaby, because it had usually been a question you loved to answer. Your response would always speak of a time of peace, long after the world was no longer at war and you, Eren, along with all your friends, could finally rest.

You returned a gentle hand to his face, sweeping aside the wet hair that stuck to his flushed cheeks with your thumb. You’d always envied Eren’s lashes, long, pretty, and dark, they now hemmed heavy eyelids, and then you lowered your finger down to his lips, still soft as you remembered. You hadn’t kissed him in a while, but now clearly wasn’t the time.

“What do you mean? We’ve talked about living together in the countryside, remember? I’m still not sure about children.” You let out a weak and airy chuckle. “Maybe one or two would be nice. How does that sound? A son with your eyes?”

That was your most earnest dream, raising a family with Eren. You’d both grown up as orphans since childhood, and now you longed to create the memories you’d never made during your youth. The corners of your mouth tugged upward at the thought of Eren as a father, you had no doubts that he would be a good one.

“What about without me?”

“I don’t want to think about that yet. You still have a few more years, stop talking like you’re dying tomorrow.” His sobering words caused your stomach to wrench, twisting into itself while you did your best to subdue your nausea. “Seriously, what are you planning? I know that look, that fucking look you have when you’re about to do something stupid.”

Long before your mother had passed, she’d remind you that every action you took warranted an appropriate consequence, normally that was whenever you misbehaved, and she was forced to discipline you accordingly. You were a curious and unruly child, but in the wake of her passing, your innocent mind couldn’t yet process the reason for her death, and you remembered her words. You worried yourself, wondering if she’d be alive if you had made a different decision. As a child, you couldn’t understand that there were some things you just couldn’t change, and as an adult, it was something you were still working on accepting, but regardless, you still believed everyone was always one decision away from a different life.

“Okay, just tell me what’s going on in your head.” You slipped your palm into Eren’s, but his grip was unusually strong. “I said we’d ride into hell holding hands didn’t I? That’s what we’ll do.”

Behind Eren’s cold stare was a host of pain, but his glare was misplaced. “That’s not what I want.”

Your fingers grew limp against his. “What?”

“Y/N, don’t miss me when I’m gone. I want you to live the life you would have had if you made another decision.”

“But I didn’t make another decision. I picked you.” Your voice was shaky, yet you tried to hide your hurt by projecting your voice. You winced once you heard the distressed sound ricochet off the empty bathroom walls and bounce back to you. How was Eren making you feel this way? He’d never made you feel this way.

He was speaking vaguely, not allowing you to place your fear, but your heart’s beating quickened and your head began swimming, because you could only guess what his concerns were. You knew about Eren’s titan capabilities, the ability to see into the past and future memories of its inheritors, and it was obvious he saw a memory that foretold a grim future.

“Stop it. You’re fucking crazy.” It hurt to speak through the throbbing lump in your throat. You spun around, turning the faucet off, and reached to grab your towel. You needed to leave, but Eren wrapped a desperate hand around your wrist, yanking you to face him. His expression was hostile, mouth bent into angry frown, but his eyes were flushed a deep pink. Was he trying not to cry?

“Listen to me,” he barked. You cowered at the power of his voice. “Do you understand how lucky you are? To live and grow old? You have a choice, I’m not going to let you throw that away because of me. I’m not worth your life.”

You felt your body begin to shake with sobs before you could even hear the strained wails leave your mouth.

“I promise––” Eren’s grip loosened. “You’ll still be able to feel my love, even after I’m gone.”

You cupped your hands forcefully over your ears, and all you could hear was the echo of your cries inside of your head. “I don’t wanna hear this. Why are you telling me this?” You felt Eren wrap his arms around you again, cradling you while you weeped loudly against his chest. He pressed a chaste kiss to your wet forehead and while you both stood there, Eren allowed you to cry for that day and all the days after.

If you would have known you’d wake up the next morning to word of Eren missing, you would have held him for much longer than you did, savoring his body heat while you grew cold. The news came quickly and it cut deep, horrible and excruciating, driving even deeper when you pieced everything together, and you began blaming yourself for it. Levi suspected that he’d gone ahead without the commander’s permission and made way to Marley on his own. Before he’d left, Eren had shown signs of frustration at the military’s inactivity, stressing that any time they wasted was more time Marley gained at obtaining the upper hand. Your temples hammered with mortified thoughts, if you’d said something else maybe he wouldn’t have left. Maybe you could have convinced him to stay, but instead you’d accused him of being crazy and tried to avoid reality.

He’d gone out of his way to say his goodbyes to you while he left without a word to anyone else, and that had to have been for a reason.

If you would have reassured him that there was another way to fulfill his plan, perhaps he would have listened. Perhaps he would have listened if you poured your heart out in return. Perhaps if you’d made another decision, things would have been different.

#eren yeager x reader #aot x reader #eren x reader #attack on titan x reader #eren x reader angst #aot angst #aot x reader angst

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miyagihawk · 3 years

Note

for hawk

lover of mine - 5sos

it's a selfship anthem, bby!

the lyrics make so much sense

i love 5sos!!!! ty for the request :)

lover of mine | eli “hawk” moskowitz x reader

warnings: cursing, i think that’s it?

summary: based on lover of mine by 5sos <3

Lover of mine

Maybe we'll take some time

Kaleidoscope mind

Gets in the way

Your relationship with Hawk was more complicated than most.

You had to be patient with him. His mind was like a kaleidoscope; his thoughts were in intricate patterns that you could never comprehend. It amazed you, but it also frustrated you when you couldn’t understand him.

And when it seemed like you finally did understand, he would shift into new colors and you’d have to start all over again.

“I just- I don’t get you, Hawk! Why are you always lying to me?” you said loudly, already feeling exhausted from the argument.

“I’m not! You just never believe me!” he turned it on you. Like always.

You looked at him with a hard stare and crossed your arms. “Did you or did you not break Demetri’s arm?” you asked in a calmer, but still threatening tone.

You already knew the answer; everyone was talking about what happened in the laser tag room. But here Hawk was, denying it. You just couldn’t grasp why he hid so much from you.

When he stayed silent with his gaze not meeting yours, you sat on your bed with an exasperated sigh.“We should take a break,” you interrupted the quiet atmosphere, looking up at where your boyfriend stood in front of you.

“What?” Hawk finally met your eyes with a hurt expression.

You patted the spot on the bed next to you, and he sat reluctantly. “I’m just tired. We need a break Hawk.”

“We don’t need a break,” he protested quietly, and the subtle sadness in his voice was enough to make your heart pang with hurt.

Hope and I pray

Darling, that you will stay

Butterfly lies

Chase them away

He was scared. Even through all the countless arguments and lies, you never left. Now you were suggesting a break, and Hawk knows from seeing other relationships that they always just end in an actual break up.

In a weird way, you did want to scare him. Because he would never change if you didn’t. You hated the idea of a break, but maybe Hawk would finally stop lying to you if you showed him you were serious.

“It’s not a breakup,” you assured, because you knew what he was thinking. For once. “We just need time apart for a little bit. To think.”

“About what?” he asked defensively, starting to raise his voice again.

“You and I. We’re quite toxic, you know?” you contrasted his volume in a lighter tone, making his face relax and his lips turn up a bit.

His small smile dropped suddenly, replaced by an anxious expression. “Don’t leave me Y/N.”

Your heart dropped at his words, and you wanted to wrap your arms around him. To tell him you’d never leave and that it was all okay. But it wasn’t all okay.

You grabbed his hand instead, “You’re my best friend. I love you. But I need this, okay? We both do. Just some time to figure out how we can fix... us.”

“I can fix it now, we don’t need to take a break. Please. I’ll never lie to you again. I just- I hate disappointing you,” he pleaded, tightening his hand around yours, and you wanted to give in.

But you knew that letting this go on, this never ending cycle, would only end with the both of you in a huge crash and burn.

“You said that last time,” you gave him a sad smile. “Let’s just figure our shit out, and then come back better for each other. We need this Hawk.”

6 months later

Things didn’t end so well after your break with Hawk. After spending some time apart, you two were just never close again.

None of you planned for it to happen; you just drifted away from each other. And neither of you exactly established when the “break” would be over.

So for the next few months, you passed each other in the halls without any acknowledgment of the other’s existence. Of course you missed him, but not being with him just became the new normal. And you accepted it and pushed your feelings aside.

“So you’ll meet us there? You sure you don’t want the limo to pick you up?” your friend Cara asked from across the lunch table.

“Yeah don’t worry about me, Jesse’s picking me up,” you replied, making the rest of your friends wiggle their eyebrows teasingly.

“What happened to prom with the girls, Y/N? I thought we established no boyfriends during prom season,” Cara pouted playfully, and you elbowed her in the ribs.

“He’s not my boyfriend. He just asked me to prom and that’s it,” you corrected.

Your other friend jumped in, “And why not? Jesse is so cute.”

As she asked, your eyes trailed away from your friends and towards a certain someone with loud red hair, sitting across the room with his karate posse.

Your group noticed your lack of attention and turned to see what you were looking at. They sighed in unison, making you bring your focus back to them.

“He’s why, isn’t he?” Cara gave you an understanding smile and rubbed your shoulder comfortingly. “It’s okay. Just have fun tonight.”

You only nodded, giving your kind friends a soft smile of appreciation.

As much as you tried to convince yourself that you’ve moved on fully, the boy with a kaleidoscope mind would always have a place in your heart.

Where is he?

You paced around your living room anxiously, checking your phone for what seemed like the millionth time in the past hour.

You scrolled through the numerous texts you’ve sent, contemplating if you should send another one. Calling him wasn’t even an option; it went straight to voicemail everytime.

After an hour and a half, you gave up waiting and hoping that your prom date would show up. You flopped down onto the couch despairingly, replying to worried texts from your friends.

‘I’m not going to make it, just don’t worry about me. Have fun my loves.’ you typed, throwing your phone onto the floor right after.

You didn’t want to ask them to pick you up and ruin their night, and you were honestly too drained from being stood up to call an Uber.

So prom night ended up with you spread out on the couch with your outfit that you’ve planned out months ago, eating out of a carton of rocky road ice cream.

Honestly, it could’ve been worse. You could’ve been spending the night with an absolute jerk named Jesse. (a/n: so sorry if ur name is jesse lmao)

In the middle of your rom com movie marathon, an abrupt knock at the front door made you sit up from your pathetic, ice cream eating position on the sofa.

Immediately, you turned off the TV and tiptoed towards the door. You silently grabbed the baseball bat next to it, while squinting to see through the peephole.

Your stomach immediately dropped when you saw him.

Clad in a black suit, with a bouquet of your favorite flowers.

Shifting on his feet and chewing on his lip nervously, as he waited for you to open the door.

The boy you didn’t know you needed to see until now.

What is he doing here?

You covered your mouth in shock as you ran to the mirror to check if you had chocolate stains around your mouth. You smoothed down your hair and straightened out your dress in a frenzy, before unlocking the door with a deep breath in.

“Hawk?” you tried to act surprised, which wasn’t hard because your heart was racing.

He took a second to look at you in your wasted prom attire, and he was locked in a trance for a second before he snapped out of it. “Oh... uh, these are for you,” he held out the flowers to you and you took them with a smile.

“Wow, I love them. Thank you,” you brought them up to your nose for a whiff of your favorite floral scent. “So, what are you doing here?” you asked awkwardly.

“Oh crap, sorry, do you want to come in?” you said before he would answer, and you opened the door wider so he could step inside.

Hawk looked around the room where he’s been countless times, and he frowned at the sight of 13 Going On 30 paused on the screen with half melted ice cream on the coffee table. That movie plus the sweet dessert was your absolute comfort pairing, and it made him sad that you needed it.

“Cara texted me, and I was worried,” he finally spoke, answering your earlier question. You suddenly felt embarrassed as you placed the bouquet in a vase. You didn’t want to be pitied. Especially by your ex-boyfriend.

“I’m fine,” you said bluntly, busying yourself with the flowers so that you wouldn’t have to face him. You hadn’t talked to him since the night you suggested the break, and you already felt too exhausted from tonight’s events to even talk about it with him. “It’s better that I didn’t go to prom with that dick.”

Hawk chuckled at your remark, and you felt more at ease. The tension between you was thicker than an iceberg, and you didn’t know if you could handle it.

“So did you leave? Or are you just dressed up like that for me?” you smiled, sitting down on the couch where he followed.

He laughed again, lightening the mood even more. “I was there, but you know, Cara told me about what happened and... I just felt like I needed to come. It was lame though. The whole thing is just dancing. And I don’t dance,” Hawk explained, and you found yourself smiling at the thought of him caring about you. “But I know how excited you were about prom, so I thought I’d bring it to you. Some romantic shit like that.”

Your eyebrows raised at “romantic shit”, but you decided not to say anything about it. Although, it did make your cheeks heat up and you hoped he didn’t notice. “That’s really sweet Hawk. Thank you. Really,” you placed your hand on top of his, but you recoiled awkwardly because it felt too intimate, given the circumstances.

You cleared your throat, “So... since you’re bringing prom to me, does that mean I get a dance?” you got up and stood in front of him with your arms playfully crossed.

Hawk squinted his blue eyes at you, crossing his arms as well, “I don’t dance, remember?”

“For me you will, right? Or I could just, you know, dance by myself. It’s already been such a great night for me,” you teased, walking away from him towards a clear space in the living room.

He groaned from behind you and got up to follow, making you cheer happily. “For you I will,” he stated under his breath, releasing dozens of butterflies in your stomach.

Dance around the living room

Lose me in the sight of you

I've seen the red, I've seen the blue

Take all of me

You turned on your Dad’s old record player, where a slow, jazzy, 60s vinyl was spinning. You almost wanted to change it because it felt too romantic, but Hawk was already waiting behind you and you were scared he would change his mind.

The rush his presence gave you made you boldly put your hands on his shoulders, and he stiffly placed his own on the curve of your waist. Your hands were locked at the nape of his neck; his hold on you was light as if you were fragile china.

You forgot how intoxicating it felt to be this close to him, and you wondered how you went so long without that feeling.

The both of you swayed to the smooth melodies of Nina Simone with interlocked eyes, and with every second his hands on your hips became more relaxed. You rested your head on his chest, pulling him closer.

For a song or two, none of you said anything; there was just an unspoken appreciation of each other’s presence. After 6 months without him, you needed this.

I'll never give you away

'Cause I've already made that mistake

If my name never fell off your lips again

I know it'd be such a shame

When I take a look at my life

And all of my crimes

You're the only thing that I think I got I right

“I should’ve never let you go,” Hawk whispered close to your ear, sending a shiver down your spine.

“I was the one who wanted the break. It’s my fault,” you opposed, lifting your head up from his chest to look up at him.

He raised one of his hands to tuck a piece of hair behind your ear, and it brought a warm smile to your face. “But I didn’t chase after you,” his lips turned down into a frown.

You put your hands on the sides of his face while you two continued to sway to the staticky vinyl. “Maybe it’s both of our faults,” you laughed lightly, touching his soft skin.

“It’s me Y/N. I’m the one who lied to you throughout the whole relationship. I’m so sorry,” Hawk looked down at you with glossy eyes. “I’ve done so much fucked up shit. But you’re the only thing I got right. I hate myself for ruining it too.”

Your felt yourself melt at his confession. “It’s not ruined,” you disputed. “You aren’t perfect and I’m not either. I shouldn’t have given up on us. I’m sorry.”

He closed his eyes in peace as your hands ran through his bright hair. It was down from its usual style, giving him a softer look.

“Maybe we both messed up. But I’m never giving you away again Y/N. I won’t make that mistake. I love you,” the boy you’ve missed for months admitted, saying everything you wanted to hear.

You kissed him in reply.

a/n: ah idk if i like this but i hope u do, i feel like my writings are getting repetitive im having bad writers block (as u can tell by how slow im doing requests)

#cobra kai #eli moskowitz #hawk cobra kai #cobra kai imagine #cobra kai x reader #eli moskowitz imagine #eli moskowitz x reader #hawk imagine #hawk x reader #cobrakai

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three-headed-monster · 2 years

Note

15 for bords/briss (bet you didn’t think i’d send them lmao)

heyyyy

so idk if this is really cute at all or what you wanted exactly buttttt here you go, have at it, a little blurb about an idea we've bounced around

“So your plan to woo Bords is to buy him clothing.”

Brendan doesn’t know why Owen sounds so skeptical about his uh-mah-zing idea when Kent is literally tucked under his arm under the couch, scrolling Instagram on his phone in a Chicago Steel sweatshirt that clearly isn’t his. It worked for them, why can’t it work for him? I mean, how else is he supposed to get Bords to notice him? They’ve been friends for forever, and the only time they’ve gotten anywhere close to kissing is when they were twelve, and Jordan accidently caught them under the mistletoe at their dad’s annual Christmas party, trying to get John Tavares and Sidney Crosby to make out.

And yeah, maybe Brendan wishes he could get another kiss from Bords, that isn’t just him slobbering grossly onto Brendan’s cheek enough to distract from the Wet Willie Bords was giving him.

“Andddd Big Dog??? Is there a problem with that? Look at you all sappy and gross with your relationship now.”

Brendan gestures vaguely at the scene in front of him, Owen sprawled out on the couch with How I Met Your Mother playing in the background and Kent’s legs tangled up in a mess with his own. It’s frankly disgusting that he has to see this at minimum once a day.

He can’t wait until he can torture Matty and Trusc by being this annoyingly romantic with Bords too.

“Hey Owen didn’t woo me by buying me stuff,” Kent pipes up. “He did that with faith, trust, and a little bit of pixie dust.”

Ah, so Owen did get drunk and tell Kent about his Tinkerbell theory after all.

“Well, I’m gonna do that but with Bords.” Brendan says, triumphantly. “Except my pixie dust will be actual gifts, unlike Owen's lame drunk confessions.”

That unsurprisingly gets a cheeky eye roll out of Kent as Owen stares at him warily, as if he’s not sure this is an idea that he should be encouraging or discouraging.

“Are you sure Bords will even appreciate it?” Owen’s voice is slightly more flat than usual, and there’s that ‘I’m curious to see where this goes but I will be disappointed either way’ tone Brendan knows all too well. “What if he just doesn’t wear any of it?”

Brendan’s already searching through the Essentials website before Owen finishes his sentence; he knows what Bords likes. He knows him better than the back of his own hand. Bords is gonna think this is the Bomb.com.

“Don’t worry about that,” Brendan scoffs, as he drops a hoodie into his cart. “Contrary to popular belief, I do know what I’m doing. And it’s all gonna be charged to my dad’s credit card anyways.”

Bords shows up to practice in a Gucci sweater the next day, and Brendan so wins when he sees Owen’s mouth drop right open at it.

Boom. Pixie dust.

#1322 #1934 #just had to add them in you know #i like the idea of briss running his insane thoughts by his friends #and them being like...yeah okay sure #idk #i hope this lived up to expectation #and it wasn't too 1322 focused #i'm trying to expand my horizons you know #q speaks #fic #rpf #queue #umich rpf blurbs

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honeytae · 3 years

Text

Stop running from love.

hey bubs! honestly..i don’t know what this is lol it kind of got away from me. but it’s loosely based off of safety net by ariana grande. which is like one of my favorite songs in existence. i hope you guys like this angsty little piece of nothing?? lmao

tags: @ahgasearmyfan, @hoseokayy, @jjlovr2015 genre: angst, fluff? word count: 2.2k

if you would like to listen, here it is:

You were doing it again.

Sabotaging yourself. Running away. Ghosting a man who had only ever shown you the utmost care and respect.

He’d already called multiple times today, frantic texts showing that he was now beyond worried at the way you’d seemingly dropped off the face of the earth.

You couldn’t blame him. You’d been exclusively dating for three months. Three beautiful and happy months alongside a great guy whose smile brightened every room he graced with his precious presence. Three months that you’d been able to not go into a panic about that very concept.

Until you fell.

The last time you’d seen Jimin was last week when he’d met with you after work for a quick bite to eat.

It was the same place you always went to; you didn’t even have to ask where you were meeting anymore, already on your way to the booth in the back corner with a stupid grin on your face.

The checker floored diner had become a regular spot for you two to stop at, as it was in the middle of the city and perfectly placed between both of your jobs.

That quick bite to eat had easily turned into a full dinner, along with a dessert that’s whipped cream ended up on the tip of his nose in an instant, your giggles causing him to grin wider as he played dumb.

It was simple, not extravagant or fancy by any means, but that was never needed with him. You always had so much fun with Jimin. He was gentle, sweet, caring. All the right things.

And it was when he was walking you back up to your apartment, his hand gripping yours in a way that was soft yet secure, sparkling eyes pressing into crescents when he smiled over at you that you came to a stunning realization; you were falling in love with him.

With a panicked last press of your lips to his cheek, you’d closed your door, leaning back against it as you stared ahead of you, absolutely paralyzed in the silence of your apartment.

You could not be in love. What even is love? Heartbreak, that’s what it is. One way or another, it will always end. You needed to pull back before you got too invested. But, fuck, was it too late?

Erupting into hysterics as you came to terms with what had to be done to protect both yourself and Jimin, you slid your back down the wood, placing your forehead on your knees as you curled up into yourself.

Since then, you’d made it your mission to put him off, every text going unanswered and each call going to voicemail.

And now here you were in your bed in the early hours of the afternoon, shades drawn to encase the room in pitch black. It matched your mood, frustrated and angry with yourself as you cried into your pillow.

You hated yourself for doing this to him. Shutting him out with no explanation; he deserves more than you. In the end, this was to his benefit. He’d go on to find someone worthy of his companionship, someone who didn’t want to disappear at the concept of love.

Someone with less baggage to drag along with them, someone who had a healthy idea of relationships and wasn’t shattered at their core.

While it was painful to ignore him without giving a reason, you knew he’d give up on you eventually. Everyone always did, and it was just for the best.

You hiccuped another sob as your phone buzzed on the table yet again, grabbing the pillow from beside you to sandwich your head between the mattress and the fluffy material, effectively muffling the noise of the vibration as you screwed your sore eyes shut.

“Love?”

You froze at the sudden unmistakable sound of Jimin’s voice calling for you, head spinning as you shut your eyes tighter.

Were you imagining Jimin’s voice beside you? Were you that far gone?

You were proven wrong when the blanket was pulled off of your body, cold air hitting the bare skin of your arms as the pillow was removed from atop your head.

You gasped at the sudden exposure, prying your eyes open to look up at none other than Jimin, the hurt and worried look on his face immediately causing you to sob again.

“Shit, baby, come here.” He rushed to sit down beside you, you easily crawling onto his lap as he wrapped his arms around your back, palm smoothing up and down your spine as he slowly rocked you back and forth.

You sat there silently, letting yourself be comforted by him. For some reason, Jimin was harder to push away than the others. His arms felt so nice around you, like home.

But this had to be done. You wanted him to stay like this in your memory, his image remaining undamaged by any painful breakup.

“Jimin, I-I can’t see you anymore. We can’t be together.” You forced out, heart twisting in agony at the silence ensuing after your words, Jimin shifting you up his lap to look at you.

“What do you mean?” He asked in disbelief, eyebrows knitting together as his eyes widened, you shaking your head instead of giving him a verbal answer due to the growing lump in your throat at his undeniably heartbroken expression.

“We just can’t, Jimin.” You said lamely, your tight grip on his arm contradicting your words as his mouth gaped open at you.

“Wh- what’s wrong? What did I do?” He asked desperately, causing you to sob harder at him blaming himself for this.

“It’s not you, Jimin. You’re amazing, you deserve a better person.” You sniffled, Jimin immediately pulling a face of further confusion as he shook his head to dismiss your words.

“A better- what are you talking about?” He asked, chasing your eyes as you chose to divert them to stare at the blank wall in front of you.

“You deserve someone amazing just like you, Jimin.” You mumbled, the man sitting there in silence before he shifted off of the bed, making you think you’d finally pushed him away.

The feeling of his weight being removed from the bed both pained and relieved you, happy for him to be able to move on now, but sad at that same idea.

But you were taken by surprise when Jimin kneeled on the floor in front of you, forcing you to look at him as he reached up to hold your chin, eyes imploring yours to be more upfront with him.

“You’re the most amazing person I’ve ever met. What are you talking about?” He repeated his question, silence lingering in the air at the words as you sat anxiously plucking the sheets below you with your fingers.

“Baby.” He called for you, his hurt tone causing your nose to scrunch up with more tears, his thumbs catching the salty water as his expression became more pained by the second.

“Let me in. Please, just let me in.” He pleaded with you, voice soft yet firm as he watched you break down in front of him, heart pounding in his chest at the mere thought of losing you from his life because of whatever insecurities you were not telling him about.

“I’m fucking broken, Jimin. You don’t want to be let in, believe me.” You said, voice weak and wavering from the emotions bubbling up in your throat, shaky from the nights of no sleep you'd gotten in the last week.

“Yes, I do. I’d accept all of you if you just gave me a chance.” He gripped your hands with his, intertwining your fingers to give a reassuring squeeze.

Staring at him, you did not know what to say. Nobody had ever pushed back on your walls like this. They accepted it, moved on, and lived a better life without you in it. You just wished Jimin would do the same.

But he was fighting you on it. Fighting you on something you didn’t even want to do in the first place.

“I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. And that fucking terrifies me.” You explained shakily, concentrating on the feeling of Jimin’s palm running up and down your arm.

“I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, either. It’s new, of course it’s scary. But I care about you, I want you, I miss you. I don’t want you to shut me out.” He said softly, his honeyed voice soothing you enough to make eye contact with his gentle brown orbs.

It was silent as you stared at each other, fear in his eyes and the same reflecting in your own. Studying his features, your heart twisted at his uncharacteristically dark circles, realizing he was probably running on the same amount of sleep you were at the moment.

“I don’t know where to go from here.” You sniffled, Jimin tucking a strand of hair behind your ear as his glassy eyes stared back at you.

Feeling confident enough to stand from the floor and sit beside you on the bed, he let you guide him up against the headboard, resting your backs on it as you let out a sigh.

“Stop pushing me away. Stop running from love.” He responded, his words sounding so genuine that you nearly burst out into tears again.

Instead, you wrapped your arms around his neck, placing your temple on his shoulder as his arms encircled your torso.

“I want to be with you.” You admitted in a hoarse whisper, head throbbing as you rested your weight on Jimin, body giving out in exhaustion as he held you to him, delicate as if you’d break. Hell, maybe you would.

“Me too.” He said without missing a beat, eagerness evident in his tone as you let your aching eyes fall shut.

“I just don’t know how.” You sighed, the man humming in response as he threaded his fingers through your hair, rubbing your scalp soothingly as he pressed a tender kiss to the top of your head.

“We can figure it out together, okay? I don’t want to throw in the towel. Not without at least a little bit of a fight.” He joked, the heavy mood in the room being lightened a bit at the sound of your exhaled laugh.

You lifted your head to look at him, opening your eyes to meet his own in the dark room, barely able to make out his features as the sun must have gone in behind the clouds outside your bedroom.

“I don’t think you know what you’re getting yourself into, Jimin. I’m a mess. If you want to run, go now.” You spoke seriously, one corner of the man’s lips lifting as he bit down on his cheek, a habit you’d picked up early on as behavior he exhibited when he was hesitant to say something.

“Listen, I’m a mess too. This is nothing.” He reassured you, your eyes studying his features as he seemed to express a vulnerability you hadn’t seen before with him.

“Trying to break up with you because of my own baggage and insecurities? That’s nothing?” You asked with a humorless chuckle, causing the man to reach out for your hand, sighing out a breath of relief when you let him lock his fingers around yours again.

“Well, I guess that in itself is something.” He shrugged, shuffling to hover over you as your red eyes met his.

“But I will always fight for you. You’re worth fighting for.” He said firmly, your eyes becoming glassed over again before you picked your head up off the pillow to catch his lips in a kiss, your palms sliding to the back of his neck as his plush lips worked over yours.

Sensing your emotions, he pulled back only slightly to press his lips over your closed eyelids, the tender action causing your frown to deepen as you gazed up at the sweet man.

“I’m not going to leave you. Whatever’s been done to you in the past, I’m not a repeat of that. I would never do anything to hurt you, I promise.” He said softly, his words seemingly making your heart alive again as it began to pound rapidly in your chest.

And with that, you threw caution to the wind. Even if he broke your heart, you couldn’t stop that from cutting your experience with him shorter than it had to be.

Because Jimin was the softest, sweetest, most lovable man you’d ever met. He showed time and time again that he cared about you, that he wasn’t like the others. And to give him up just because of some bad past experiences was just not worth it.

“I trust you.” You whispered, almost scared to let the words fall from your lips, but relieved when you saw the wide smile on Jimin’s face.

“I trust you, too.” He said softly, tracing his finger over your cheek as he leaned down to kiss you again, laying down beside you to spoon your body with his, pressing his lips against your shoulder in a soothing action.

Laying in his arms, you felt more at peace than you’d felt in days. Being back in his embrace, you felt like you could breathe again, easily falling into much needed sleep with his warmth pressed to your back, his arms looped around your body as he pressed tender kisses to the shell of your ear.

Jimin was your home. And it felt so good to be home.

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liketheinferno2 · 2 years

Text

Alright so now that I am IN STORMBLOOD I feel like while I've immediately realised /why/ people dislike it; the brutality is amped up sharply, we've left the cushy eyeball metaphor and gone directly into explicit horrors, there's female characters being pathetic and difficult, and the villain is an unhinged manchild.... but these are all things I really really really enjoy lmao I'm having a fantastic time. Here's Patchi cold clocking Elskan:

A lot of you thought I'd like Zenos, and I do think he's a funny bitch. I like that he's trying really hard to make his voice sound sexy and it just doesn't. But also I'm in danger. Mags insists the only way this man has ever gotten off in his life was when the WOL was beating his ass and from first impressions I'm inclined to believe that, or at least I dearly want to. Also always loved how the Garlean armor has these big exaggerated third eye designs like they're compensating for something. Like check out how fat and luscious my forehead lump is.

I think Haurchefant's just going to stay with me. I've taken his title as well because as far as I'm concerned Patchi's still a grieving widower right now. In-character moment, he took what happened with Estinien very hard and has resolved not to lose himself to anger anymore, because seeing a close comrade reach the point of "the only way out of this is kill myself" clicked together the realization that if he doesn't shape up that's the way he'll go as well, and that's simply not allowed to happen. Too much love for others who need him to be around.

Also fuck yeah DESERT. It's Pagos shirt time again baby. You thought you'd seen the last of her. I'm open to whatever inner torment Lyse has going on and I think she's interesting but also they should not have let her have a fake identity for five years holy shit lol. It's kind of not connected right in my brain because new look, new face, new name, new voice acting, new personality? My brain interprets it as Yda just died and they put her sister in her place, not least because that's what happened actually but not really but it did.

We were having rather a spirited conversation about the way that women in this game are sensible and competent and mature and regularly pretty but also generally milder, and how the western audience's first instinct might be to assume that they're getting less development because the game's favouring male players and therefore male characters and male experiences... but it ain't so. The men are simultaneously more in-focus and FAR more sexualised, made to hit more attractive appeal points and also to BE HORNY DIRECTLY AT YOU.

The fact that women don't lust after the player really at all tells me this much -- the game is favouring straight female players so hard it hasn't stopped shovelling beautiful tormented men into your mouth up until this point. However. Lyse being immature and brash, inexperienced and angry, lashing out because a recent tragedy has stolen a core aspect of the identity she'd been using as a shield? Bodes well I say. Still wish a girl would be embarrassingly lustful in my direction in this game for once, though having my little catboy cat-man being a dude-magnet exclusively is kind of amusing on its own. My only qualm is that her design is full-on lame-ass girlfriend, but Ardbert's a compelling lame-ass boyfriend, so call that equality and stick a fork in it.

Also, his name escapes me presently but this guy was one of my favourite parts of ARR so I'm delighted to see him back, about 150 hours later. Loved all the Ala Mhigo stuff then and I'm still into it now. Did he get a new face? He's very pretty.

Alberic has some kind of calming fatherly energy now, I don't know if it's because I've tried so hard to take care of his boy for the past however-long Heavensward was. Just noticed he's greying too. The dragoon stress I'll bet. Estinien fucking off without even leaving a note is such an Estinien thing to do.... Midlanders being one of the shorter races, I thought about Estinien hitting his first Elezen puberty and bamboo-shooting past Alberic in a year or so and now I'm tearing up lol

and now WOLSHIP IN YOUR EYES!!!

You love Miqo/Viera height difference so much I know you do

Mags showed Patchi to their FC discord and I have been eating up the praise all night. He IS a good catboy they ARE a hot couple I did a good job, thank you.

Also humina humina Mint's new outfit.

There's also the small matter of WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAH WHAT ARE THOSE. No longer at motorboat height. This is something else. This is snussy-eating height. Good day.

#dante plays catboy simulator

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crispy-chan · 3 years

Text

burning sunflower | yang jeongin

↠ pairing: yang jeongin x gn!reader

↠ genre & warnings: fluff, hanahaki au (vomiting flower petals), lil bit of angst, strangers to friends to lovers, school au, soccer player!jeongin

↠ summary: your only friend Seungmin introduces you to Jeongin, the star of the school's soccer club and one of the most popular guys in the school. you two become friends quickly but you start to catch feelings...

↠ word count: 6.8k

↠ a/n: sooo, this was written for the @newskynet Valentine's day special event. Not sure if it's too late but it's Sunday evening where I live... if I slipped up with the gn! reader, please let me know. feel free to roast me for my lame header, I just decided to put the lectures on how to use GIMP to good use lmao

the prompts I used were: 21 “For me?”, 6. “No one’s ever given me something like this before.” 16. “Will you be my valentine?”

my masterlist

One.

You're not really sure when you started to like Jeongin. I mean, you two were friends, don't get me wrong but that was it. Friends.

That was all he would ever see you as, you thought bitterly. The label that many would love to have but you cursed yourself for it every day. You see, you were first introduced to the smiling boy by your good friend Seungmin who thought you should at least try to make friends other than him, claiming that he won't be with you forever.

***

“Oh come on Min, I thought we'd always be friends,” you whined as he dragged you to a small cafe after school where you would meet his friend.

“Stop acting so childish Y/N, you have to start talking to other people too, you know.”

“But whyyyy? I have you, right?” you giggled at his unamused expression, telling you that he had enough of your shit.

“Nope. You're going to make other friends and that's final. You wouldn't want to really turn into a hermit crab,” he said smugly.

Now it was your turn to look unimpressed. “You don't need to bring up my spirit animal, sheesh. What a low blow, even for someone like you, Min.”

“What was a low blow?” a boy around your age with a cheerful smile approached you giving you a questioning look. You just stood there nervously, staring at him for god knows how long until Seungmin finally broke the ice with a rather awkward cough and proceeded to introduce you guys.

“Y/N, this is Jeongin. Jeongin, this is Y/N,” he pointed at the two of you, swiftly introducing you to the other.

“Um,” you awkwardly extended your hand for a handshake, “hello, I'm Y/N, Seungmin's friend.”

He shook your hand with a firm grip before smiling from ear to ear, “I'm Jeongin, from the neighboring class.”

After you guys settled, you proceeded to order your drinks and snacks. The atmosphere was undeniably awkward, but Seungmin seemed adamant about reaching his goal.

“So look guys, I brought you both here because you both need more friends. You're both introverts who like to hide in their shells and I think you two have a lot in common, so I think this would be beneficial for both parties.”

“So you're basically trying to say that you don't want to hang out with us anymore?”

The innocence in his tone almost fooled you for a second, before you noticed the smug expression on his face and couldn't hold in the burst of laughter.

“Man, I like him already,” you sniggered after you caught your breath, patting a visibly annoyed Seungmin on the back.

“Who would have thought there is someone more savage than you in this school.”

The unimpressed deadpan he gave you made you fall into another fit of giggles, prompting Jeongin to chuckle too.

After the waitress came back with your beverages, you proceeded to distract yourself by making little paper balls and blowing them through your straw into the ceramic pot on the table. You got so distracted, that you spaced out and didn’t notice when Seungmin started waving his hand in front of your face.

“Y/N, Y/N! Are you even listening?”

You felt your cheeks heat up in embarrassment at being caught zoning out. No wonder you had no friends. Slowly lifting your head, you faced Seungmin, waiting for him to repeat what he just said.

“I asked if you wanted to come to watch him play on Saturday.”

“Watch who?” you asked confusedly.

“Jeongin, he's on our school's soccer team,” he deadpanned, annoyed at your lack of concentration.

“Umm, sure...I guess. I'm not much of a sports person but I have nothing to do on the weekend,” you mumbled, mentally checking for any possible plans or chores you could have. Well jokes on you, you had none.

Jeongin beamed at that, taking a sip from his beverage as he pulled out his phone. “I'm glad you can make it - Seungmin would come but he has an exam he has to prepare for,” he explained, “the match starts at five o'clock.”

“Wait, wait, what? There's an exam next week?” you screeched. You were almost positive that there weren't any but dread filled you at even the slightest possibility.

The boy let out a chuckle at your obvious panic, shaking his head. “No, the exam is in two weeks but you know how he is.”

You could feel a weight being lifted from your heart as you sighed in relief. “Thank god, I thought I missed something,” you giggled.

Jeongin smiled at the display. Maybe hanging out with you wouldn't be that bad, at least he'd have someone he knew watching the game other than Seungmin who wasn't exactly the most supportive when it came to sports, opting to rearrange his binder or do his homework instead of watching.

“Thanks, it means a lot to me. I'm always happy if there is someone cheering for me in the stands,” he winked, making your heart skip a beat.

Wait a minute.

Something wasn't right here.

After the two of you bid goodbye to Jeongin, you dragged Seungmin out of the cafe, the gears in your head spinning at maximum speed.

“Wait a second Seungmin, he's not that popular striker who scores most of our school's goals that all the girls swoon over, right? Please tell me I'm right,” you stammered, pulling on his sleeve.

“Relax Y/N, he's really nice-”

“So it's him?!”

“Yes,” he sighed, opening his mouth to say something, probably to convince you to not bail on his friend but you didn't even give him the chance.

“I can't believe it! Why didn't you tell me? You made me agree to accompany one of the most popular guys in our school! His fangirls will kill me,” you hissed. Although you never remembered his name, it was practically basic knowledge that anyone on the soccer team was insanely popular with a cult-like following of crazed fans who went after anyone near them.

“Calm down, ok,” he held you by the shoulders, “ you will be ok, alright? He's a really nice guy who could also use some friends. All the other guys on the team are seniors so it's hard for him to find someone he can talk to face to face,” he tried to explain.

“And don't worry,” he added with a smile, “you don't have to do anything, just come and watch the match and cheer him on a bit, alright?”

“Alright,” you groaned.

Two.

You should have never agreed to come to that soccer game. That ultimately became your downfall. If you had never agreed to this, maybe you wouldn't be like this today.

You sighed, rummaging through your closet and trying to figure out what the hell were you supposed to wear. I mean - what was it even. You had no clue what was going to happen, you only knew that he and his teammates would pick you up on their way to the match.

He texted you the day before that he and the boys would stop by your house at three-thirty to come and collect you. After ten minutes of just standing there, you finally decided on a casual outfit and ran to your door to put your sneakers on. As if on cue, you could hear a car honking right outside your door and your phone lit up with a new text message.

Jeongin [03:32]

We're here.

You slammed the door shut and made your way to the vehicle. You could see a boy you recognized but didn't remember his name, behind the wheel. Inside the van, there were a few other boys scattered around, including Jeongin who sat in the back alone.

“Hi Y/N, hop in,” he beamed, rolling down the window. You smiled back, opening the door and taking a seat next to him.

“So, are you excited?” the boy driving turned to look at you with a grin as he slowly backed the car, driving away from your house.

“Yeah, it's been a while since I watched our team play and from what I’ve heard, you guys are pretty good,” you smiled nervously under their gazes.

They all laughed at that, happy to hear they had a good reputation even amongst the students not involved in sports.

“I'm Chan, by the way, captain of our schools’ soccer club,” the boy behind the wheel stated. Oh, so that's why he seemed so familiar. Practically everyone knew him, and he knew everyone too. He'd often greet people who didn't think he knew they existed and was always extra kind which combined with his captain status led to his immense popularity.

“The grumpy one next to me is Minho,” he pointed to the currently sleeping figure in the passenger's seat.

“Hey! I’m not grumpy!”

Well. Looks like he wasn't asleep after all.

“I'm Jisung,” the cheerful boy in front of you chimed as he turned around and gave you a big smile.

“And I'm Hyunjin.”

“Um, well...I'm Y/N,” you winced at how awkward you sounded but luckily, they didn't seem to mind as they all giggled.

“We know,” came Minho's curt reply, “Jeongin wouldn't shut up about you.”

“Ouch,” Minho screeched as Jeonging threw his shoe at him.

The rest of the car ride went rather smoothly, other than the occasional bickering of the guys but you honestly didn't mind. It was kind of comforting to just let go of everything and laugh along. It surprised you how nice they were, you kind of imagined them as selfish pricks but that clearly wasn't the case.

At one point, Hyunjin and Jisung started arguing over which color uniform they should wear for the match. You watched with a hint of amusement, that was until they turned to you for help.

“But look, if we choose the red one, Chan will be able to live out his dream as Christiano Bangnaldo,” Jisung pleaded as Chan let out an embarrassed chuckle.

“Christiano Bangnaldo? Wow, I'm wheezing.”

“Exactly,” Hyunjin cut you guys off, “that's why we should choose the blue one, it goes better with my skin tone.”

“Oi, nobody cares about your damn skin tone, I want to see Christiano Bangnaldo,” Minho stated loudly, completely shutting up the younger two. Welp, seems like it was decided. What Minho wants, Minho gets.

After you finally arrived at the dimly lit school stadium, you made your way out of the car as Jeongin held the door open for you. Smiling, you thanked him for the kind gesture before finally looking around. And your socks were pretty much blown off.

Now you were wondering, why you never came here before. The field was slowly starting to fill with other students slash players but that didn't manage to hide the undeniable beauty of this place. The bleachers were surprisingly clean, unlike most high school stadiums. The dim lights cast a nice glow over the stadium, giving it a really homey feel. You looked around in awe, still surprised by the atmosphere of this place.

“Have you ever been here during the night?” a lean figure stood behind you, observing you and effectively cutting off your train of thought.

“Nope. This is the first time,” you breathed out.

“That's what I thought. It looks completely different when it's dark,” he chuckled, turning around to head to the locker rooms.

“So... I have to head back so we can all change. You can take a seat wherever you want, I'd recommend the first row,” he winked cheekily, accompanying the gesture with a throaty laugh.

You blushed at that, choosing to snuggle into your shirt, to hide your embarrassment. How could he be so cheesy so casually? He must have noticed your slight shiver as he slipped out of his varsity jacket.

Before you could even protest, he had already placed the jacket around your shoulders, patting your head. You opened your mouth to object but he cut you off, “it's ok Y/N, I’m not gonna need it anyways. And by the way...thank you for coming, I really appreciate it.”

You smiled, realizing that something that seemed so pointless, so small could mean so much to someone else. He seemed genuinely excited to have someone cheering for him, even if he had tens of fangirls doing just that. You huffed in the chilly wind, lifting your head up to gaze at him.

“No problem Jeongin, I'm happy I came.”

Something about how he smiled at you, stirred your insides, made your heart skip a beat. Your eyes trailed after him, lingering on his receding figure. You didn't look away until he stepped into the locker room, the door pretty much obstructing your gaze and snapping you out of this trance.

Looking around, you could sense that the stadium was slowly filling up. If you wanted to have a seat, you would have to be quick. You ran down to the first row seats but with a sigh realized that most of them were already taken. You were about to give up and run up to find a spot in the next row but a sharp tug on your sleeve stopped you.

Turning around, you spotted a boy, maybe a year or two older than you, looking at you with a curious face. You tried to pry out of his hold, tugging on your hand but he didn't let go. Right when you were about to scream, he finally spoke, “are you Jeongin's friend? We saved you a seat,” he motioned to the spot next to him.

“How the hell do you know that?” you asked, confusion evident.

“Well,” he chuckled, “the jacket…”

Oh. right. You were wearing Jeongin's varsity jacket. You almost forgot.

“So… are you and Jeongin-”

“No,” you cut him off before he could even finish the sentence, “I'm a friend of a friend who couldn't make it today so I came instead.”

“Oh, you see - I thought, Hyunjin said-” he suddenly stopped, not bothering to continue, instead opting to tug you down to sit next to him.

“Watch,” was all he said.

You sat there obediently, watching the game and occasionally cheering Jeongin on, whenever he passed the ball or attempted to score. He was really good, especially considering that he was the youngest on the team.

During the less intense parts of the game, you made small talk with the boy next to you. He introduced himself as Jinyoung. He was the captain of the lacrosse team and a good friend of Chan and Hyunjin. You found out that as a captain, he would attend almost all the other sports events that his friends partook in, claiming it to be common courtesy.

Both of you refocused your attention on the game. Your team seemed to be on the offensive again, Hyunjin passing the ball to Jisung, who maneuvered around one of the opposing team’s defenders before eventually passing to Minho.

Just when he was about to kick it, another leg appeared from the side, tripping him and making him fall flat on his face. He managed to at least stick out his hands so they would take the brunt of the fall but he struggled to get up on his feet.

Before the other boy could get away with the ball, the referee blew the whistle, signalizing a foul and stopping the game.

“What happened? Is he ok?” you asked, frantically scrambling up and leaning into the field from behind the barrier.

“Don't worry,” Jinyoung chuckled, “he'll be fine. They'll probably be getting a penalty kick. And I bet you a hundred bucks that Jeongin will be the one to take the shot.”

“Wait really? Is he that good?” you surprisedly inquired.

“Yeah, he's the best shot on the team.”

Now you were excited. You heard that he was good but never realized to what extent.

Jinyoung was right. You could see the coach huddled with the players in a circle, probably talking strategy or something before Chan patted Jeongin on the back. They all withdrew from the group circle leaving Jeongin to stand in front of the ball and the other team's goalkeeper to hunch down in preparation for the kick.

The referee blew the whistle, signalizing the resuming of the game. Jeongin took a few steps back before bursting into a run, kicking the ball into the upper left corner with utmost control.

You all stood up in anticipation, the kick seeming almost as if in slow motion, you could see the goalkeeper jump to his left, desperate to catch the ball before it landed in the net but his attempt was futile.

The kick he delivered was far too good to be caught, the expert technique and control visible to any onlooker. Paired with a huge roar of applause, you could all see the ball land in the goal with a thud.

Everyone erupted in cheers, including you and the atmosphere was great. You could see a few photographers who probably worked for the local sports columns, their cameras clicking like crazy, trying to capture the moment of glory of this young high schooler.

All of his teammates pulled Jeongin into a collective embrace, Chan slipping off his goalkeeper gloves before hoisting the boy on his shoulder.

In the heat of the moment, Jeongin looked through the spectators, trying to find the person that came to watch him. When he spotted you, cheering him on with a big grin, he couldn't help the fond smile from appearing. After he finally caught your gaze, he shot you a friendly wink, laughing at your flustered reaction.

“Wow, just friends you say,” Jinyoung teased, witnessing the whole exchange.

“Oh shut up! We met like a week ago.”

***

Fast forward to the end of the match. You guys won two to none, the second goal scored by Minho with the assistance of Jeongin and Hyunjin. Everyone was excited, the adrenalin and momentum of the game still hasn't passed. The smell of sweat and coke (coca-cola!) heavy in the air as you sat with the team on the benches and reminiscenced the game.

“Jeongin! That goal of yours was really great, you had so much control over the ball. All those hours of practice have paid off!”

Jeongin shyly hid his face, all the praise from his captain making him feel fuzzy from the inside.

“Yeah, everyone in the bleachers froze in anticipation when you kicked the ball,” you chimed in, feeling the need to join the praise bandwagon for the boy, “it was really cool.”

After that, Jeongin continued to receive pats on the back from fellow teammates, a few coaches, and random people that you didn't even know who came to congratulate him on his flawless playing today.

Overall, everyone had a great time. The stars were out and you all just wanted to soak up the atmosphere. So this is what having a social life during your teenage years meant? It made you wonder, how much were you missing out on. You wished time would just freeze, allowing you to live in this moment forever. You were gonna have to thank Seungmin for this later.

Jeongin, who was seated next to you must have noticed you zoning out. He placed his palm on your shoulder and asked, “are you ok Y/N? Do you want us to take you home?”

You blinked. Once. Twice. And only after the third time did you realize, that you still haven’t answered his question. You smiled before letting the reassuring words slip out of your mouth, “I'm fine. Great actually. Can't remember when was the last time I had so much fun.”

He sighed in relief, glad that you were having fun. From what he could tell (and from what Seungmin told him) you didn't have many friends nor did you hang out with people. The only person you considered a friend was Seungmin and he wasn't exactly a social butterfly himself, opting to study in most of his free time.

All of you ended up chatting until nine pm, completely forgetting about the time and simply enjoying yourselves. You checked your phone at nine-thirty, gasping in shock at the time.

“Everything ok?” Chan asked with concern.

“Um, yeah. Just didn’t realize it was so late. I should probably get going,” you muttered nervously, picking up all your belongings and shoving them into your bag.

“Oh right, it's quite late already. We'll give you a ride, right Chan?” Jeongin turned to his captain.

“Of course. Let's all get going. Chop chop. C'mon Hyunjin, you can tell them about your skincare routine next time,” he pulled the whining boy away from his third victim today.

You packed yourselves into the van, the seating arrangements only slightly different from on your way here. Hyunjin must have been still pissed at Chan for cutting his skincare speech short because he wouldn't shut up about it on the way to the parking lot. He kept going on and on about how moisturizing is important, even if you have oily skin. The captain dismissed his rant with a laugh and started the engine as the complaining boy sat down in the passenger seat.

At some point, Into the unknown came on shuffle and all the boys except Jeongin started singing. You burst out in laughter at their failed attempts at singing the high notes, seeing Jeongin hide his face in embarrassment.

“Guys! Come on, stop it,” he pleaded but the older boys only smirked in response and started singing even louder. By now, you were dying from laughing so hard, Jeongin having to pat your back aggressively so you won't choke on your own spit.

After they got bored of singing, you became their main talking point and they kept asking you borderline intrusive questions until Jeongin told them off, seeing how you turned slightly uneasy. Because of the typical Saturday evening traffic, you ended up falling asleep on the shoulder of a slightly pink Jeongin. He became super nervous once he realized you weren't awake and tried his best not to move and to hold you steady on every speed bump.

It took about fifteen more minutes for you guys to arrive in front of your place. Chan parked on the street and turned to say goodbye.

“Thanks for coming, Y/N. We're glad you came. Hope you had fun too,” he smiled, his dimples making an appearance.

“Jeongin especially,” Jisung whispered not-so-quietly and squeaked from the death glare Chan shot him.

You laughed softly, your cheeks bunching up as you waved them goodbye.

When you were laying in bed, your mind wandered off to today's events. As much as you didn't want to admit it, Seungmin was right. You really enjoyed yourself.

***

It was a sunny Monday morning when you were walking up the steps to your school entrance. You spent the rest of the weekend thinking about the Saturday game, not yet sure, how you felt about this newfound hobby. Maybe you should really spend more time with people. You also washed up Jeongin's varsity jacket that you forgot to return on Saturday evening.

You held the paper bag containing the washed piece of clothing in your right hand as you pushed the entrance door with your left. It felt all too easy, almost as if the door opened on its own. And you realized that no, you didn't grow stronger from that one arm toning workout you did yesterday as you saw a veiny hand press into the glass.

You turned to face that mystery person, only to sigh in relief as you were left face to face with Chan.

“Oh, hello,” you smiled, greeting him rather timidly. Because let's face it - you weren't exactly sure if they even considered you a friend. You were just some random girl that came to their soccer game.

Thankfully, he seemed to consider you a friend too as he gave you his dimpled smile, “hey Y/N, how was your weekend?”

“It was pretty good. I had lots of fun on Saturday and yesterday I just chilled,” you beamed.

“Same here,” he laughed, “we all pretty much passed out when we got home- oh shoot, the bell's off, I have to get to class. See you around.”

With a simple wave, he dashed out of your sight, turning around the corner to climb up the stairs to his classroom. You then remembered that you too had class and if you didn't wanna be late, you'd have to make a dash for it too.

***

It was during lunch break that you remembered that you had to return Jeongin his jacket. You nervously walked to his homeroom, anxious about what was going to happen. Will he think you're weird for coming to his class? Will he be embarrassed when you come up to him in front of all his friends? You sighed as you entered the classroom. It seemed like nobody noticed you at first, everyone was way too immersed with their own stuff. You could see that they all got along, the room booming with chatter and laughter.

Jeongin's table was near the window, a girl's chair turned to face him as they both engaged in a conversation. You awkwardly shuffled a few meters away, not wanting to interrupt. It was a truly wrecking moment, you even considered just turning around and disappearing without a trace but Jeongin noticed you and gave you a wide smile.

“Hey Y/N. What brings you here?”

You stood there for a few seconds before you finally remembered, what you came for. “Umm, hi. Just wanted to return this,” you handed him the bag, “I washed it and everything. Thanks for borrowing it.”

His eyes flashed in recognition after he peeked into the bag and he immediately returned the bag to your hand.

“It's fine,” he mumbled with slightly rosy cheeks (not that you noticed), “you can have it, I don't mind.”

You stared at him in shock, mouth slightly agape to which he awkwardly laughed. You were about to protest but the bell rang and Jeongin muttered that you should better get back to class.

You nodded in embarrassment, not even being able to look him in the eye as you hastily waved and ran out of the classroom.

You were mentally beating yourself up for that, you should have never come to his class, he must have been embarrassed that someone like you came to his class, everyone was probably used to him hanging around popular people like that girl he was talking to.

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. You stuffed the paper bag with his jacket into your backpack, what were you even supposed to do with it - did he not hear that you washed it or something?

When you arrived home, you hung the jacket on one of the hooks near the door and headed to your room to get some homework done.

Three

It was a few months later that you and Jeongin officially became friends. During that time, the both of you hung out a lot more, courtesy of Seungmin and the rest of the soccer team who thought the two of you made great friends. It started out simple at first: getting coffee together, working on homework, and cursing that physics assignment you both had no clue how to finish.

Times like these made you realize how much of a fun person Jeongin was. There was never a dull moment around him yet despite his easygoing and fun nature, you noticed he preferred to keep to himself, only hanging out with his closest circle of friends. A category which you seemed to now fall under too.

Despite all your anxiousness about whether you were even “worthy” (as some would say) of being his friend, Jeongin always told you that he didn't care if you weren't labeled as popular by the rest of the student body.

“Y/N, we've had this conversation many times already. I really couldn't care less that you aren't a popular cheerleader and don't have Gucci bags,” he smiled, pushing a stray strand of hair that fell in front of your face, behind your ear.

“I know, I know. Sorry Jeongin, I know you aren't like that. I just get really anxious when those kids bury me with their gazes when I dare look at you.”

“Look, if anyone is bothering you, please tell me ok? I'll talk to them. I don't want you to suffer from being my friend,” he smiled, waving the waitress over to order for you guys.

“Don't worry, Jeongin. I promise I will,” you smiled, turning back to your physics workbook. The homework was on magnetic motors or something like that and you had no clue how to do it.

“Umm, do you know the answer to question three?” you asked, chewing on your bottom lip.

“Nope. I fell asleep during that class,” he admitted with a chuckle.

“Oh come on. You can't do that. You should pay attention.”

“Like you paid any,” he pointed, taking a sip of his lemonade.

“Excuse me!” you gasped, “I did pay attention. I just didn't understand any of it. That's different.”

“Hmm. It sure is.”

Four

You were leaning over the sink in your bathroom, blood and flower petals splattered all over as you tried your best to get it all out of your throat. The petals were bright yellow. Sunflower petals.

How ironic, you thought. Sunflowers represented adoration, longevity, and pure thoughts. Just like how you felt towards Jeongin. And how he'd never feel towards you.

You bit back a sob as you choked on even more of the soft petals. In a sense, you were quite lucky - had you been coughing up any other flower (especially roses), it would probably hurt way more. But that still didn't mean that it wasn't painful. Your breath heaved as you tried your best to take deep breaths, your constricted lungs filled with petals, not exactly helping.

You have been suffering from the hanahaki disease for a few weeks now. You always thought it was a myth from the internet, never once have you expected to run to the bathroom at three am to hurl petals into the sink. It started slowly at first. You'd only cough out some petals and drops of blood, but it got progressively worse.

You'd have days that you wouldn't be able to even get out of bed with the exhaustion you felt. All you wanted to do was sleep and forget about the cute boy with dimples. But no, you could never be angry at Jeongin. He was an absolute sweetheart who was nothing but kind to everybody. You couldn't exactly blame him for being around other people. That's right, you didn't know if they were dating but he seemed to hang around this girl called Lia a lot recently, the one he was talking to months prior. They seemed to be good friends too, apparently knowing each other for years now. You tried your best to suppress the jealousy that was rising in you, along with the petals.

You quickly turned back to the sink, just in time for it to catch the new batch of bloodied petals. Even thinking about her made your heart ache and you absolutely despised yourself for that. Lia was nothing but a sweet girl that always smiled at you in the hallway and occasionally made small talk with you.

***

A week later you were walking down the corridor, looking for the vending machine. It seems like they recently moved it from its original location, in front of the lab. You turned around the corner, your eyes bulging out of your skull at what you saw.

Jeongin and Lia were hunched near the lockers, whispering and giggling at something. He said something, making the girl shake her head in denial as he arched his brow. You couldn't watch anymore, quickly running back and abandoning your original plan of finding the vending machine and instead, running to the bathroom. You slammed the door shut, flinging yourself over the toilet as you vomited heaps of the yellow petals, this time mixed with some green leaves and stems. This was by far the worst case, you have never thrown up green before.

You wiped your dry lips, attempting to take deep breaths and calm your heart. It was horrible what seeing the two together did to you. You couldn't believe you lost control like that only a few meters away from him. What would happen if he saw you?

You had to suppress it. He could never find out.

***

It was a truly painful day. Tomorrow was Valentine's Day and you could see all the stores decorated with pinks and reds, hearts everywhere, and signs welcoming couples with tempting discounts.

Your stomach did flips as you walked the path to the school door. It hurt. It hurt so fucking much. You contemplated calling sick the next day and not going to school at all, but you had an important paper to hand in and the professor was especially grumpy and wanted it on his desk on that particular day.

You trudged up the steps with a frown, when you heard your name being called.

“Hey, Y/N,” Chan called after you, running up the stairs to catch up.

“Oh hey, Chan,” you mumbled, mustering up your best fake smile but he still managed to see through it.

“Is everything ok?” he asked, obviously concerned.

“Yeah, just a little tired,” you dismissed, leaving him and running towards your locker.

Good job Y/N, you groaned, now you can't even hang out with your other friends.

You spent the rest of the day avoiding the whole group, trying your best to overpower the need to throw up petals. You didn't want to repeat the previous incident in school. Jeongin must have by now noticed how distant you were. He probably thought you hated him by how you kept avoiding him for the past month.

He probably wanted to ask you to come to his game tomorrow which you sure as hell weren't planning to attend. On top of the fact that you could literally shower the whole stands with petals, it was also going to be Valentine's day and there was no telling if the boy was going to ask Lia out or something like that.

And your heart wouldn't be able to handle that.

You ran home after your last period. Your stomach growled at the lack of lunch but you figured it was better than running into one of them.

You stomped into the bathroom, not even taking off your shoes as you threw up into the bin. There was more blood today. There was no telling of what would happen tomorrow, the romantic atmosphere would probably only serve as a bitter reminder of your broken heart.

You wiped your lips, deciding that taking a shower would be in your best interest. After that, you sat by your desk and made some finishing touches to the essay due tomorrow.

Maybe you would just come to turn it in and then dip…

***

You woke up with a strangled cry, the dream you had still playing in your head. With a groan you slumped out of bed, ready to prepare for the day but to your horror, you realized that you overslept. You had approximately ten minutes before you had to leave. You brushed your teeth, shoved some toast down your throat, and gathered your things. With a sense of urgency, you threw on jeans, a blouse, and some sneakers, not feeling like dressing up.

You had to leave immediately. Like now. You grabbed your backpack, quickly checking the essay was there, took your keys off the hook, and grabbed the first jacked you could find. It was dark blue (and very soft) meaning it would match almost anything you had on and since the weather was chilly, you wouldn't want to risk catching a cold.

Running out the door, you pulled it on and slung the backpack on your shoulder, running to the bus stop. Only then did you notice the engraved initials YJ on the sleeve and cursed yourself for bringing the wrong one. You would have taken it off right away if it wasn't for the blasting AC.

You stomped up the chairs, annoyance coursing through your veins. This day couldn't get any worse. Still thinking about leaving after handing in the assignment, you almost avoided going to your locker but remembered the jacket. You'd just drop it in and head to the professor's office.

You dug around for your keys until you finally found them in the bottom of your backpack. You slid it in the keyhole and opened the locker.

You were surprised by a giant teddy plushie and a box of chocolates. Your eyes widened in surprise before you heard a loud “surprise”.

Turning around, you were face to face with a grinning Jeongin. He stood over you with a large bouquet of beautiful sunflowers and the rest of the team, Lia, and Seungmin were all behind him cheering and throwing confetti.

To say that you were in shock would be a massive understatement. The look of utter confusion must have been plastered on your face as Jeongin smiled and handed you the bouquet.

“For me?”

He nodded slowly, examining your expression. You took the flowers from him, lowering your head to smell them.

“No one's ever given me something like this before,” you croaked, tears beginning to well in your eyes.

Jeongin nervously stood there before grabbing your hand and looking you in the eyes.

“Y/N, we've been friends for some time now but I wanted to ask you… Will you be my valentine?”

“Of course I will,” you whispered, almost jumping at him and swallowing him in a bone-crushing hug.

“I've liked you for some time now,” you admitted after a while, burying your head into his chest and enjoying the sudden way you seemed to breathe easier, not feeling the itchy petals in your throat anymore.

“Same here,” he laughed.

“Wait really? Since when?” you asked perplexed.

“Since I gave you my jacket,” he grinned, “I'm glad to see that you're making proper use of it.”

“Come on everybody, let's leave them alone,” Chan hollered, dragging everybody away to give you guys some privacy.

“I'm sorry if it seemed like I was avoiding you for the past week. I was planning with Lia on how to do, how to do all of this, you know,” he pointed at all the gifts he got you.

“Thank you,” you smiled again, “I really appreciate it Jeongin.”

“Do you want to come to the game today? I'd introduce you to all my other friends.”

“I'd love to.”

He seemed to be thinking about something, his nose scrunching up before he looked at you and placed his hands on your waist.

You peered at him through your lashes as he slowly leaned down, pressing his plush lips to yours and sealing them into a kiss. You closed your eyes, leaning down to get even closer to him as you gripped his shirt for support. The kiss was short but sweet and you were startled apart by a loud wolf whistle.

You turned around, cheeks burning in embarrassment at Jisung doing kissy faces and Hyunjin laughing in the background. You almost jumped away and Jeongin just chuckled.

“The game starts two hours after school. Do you want to go on like a proper date before that?”

“Sure,” you smiled, “I should probably get going, I have to submit this essay,” you waved the piece of paper that counted for nearly half of your final grade for the quarter.

“Don't forget the flowers,” he pointed to the bouquet.

“About that, maybe I should leave it in my locker. You know - to not start anything,”

“Y/N,” he said with a serious tone, “I don't care what the others think. They'll know by the evening anyways.”

You were startled at first, but then realized that he was right. No more caring about what others thought about you.

Now it was just you and Jeongin. You liked the sound of that.

“Okay,” you smiled, picking up the flowers, “I'll meet you at two in front of the lockers.”

With a smile, you walked in the direction of your classroom. After weeks of pain and sorrow, you finally felt like everything fell into place.

***

a/n: aaaaaaah. idk why all my oneshots so far are for jeongin but nvm. hope you liked it. it couldn't resist the idea of soccer player jeongin ;)

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