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4ttack-ur-heart · 8 months

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Flock of Birds

Pairing: levi x gn! Reader

Summary: You’re injured, disoriented, and alone in the middle of the forest with your thoughts. The rest of the Levi squad is dead. You’re hoping death comes sooner rather than later, but luckily your Captain finds you in time.

Warnings: angst, descriptions of violence, reader hoping for death, happy ending.

**something to get me back into writing, and apparently symbolism is hard for me to write. Takes place during season 2 and reader is apart of his og squad.

Their relationship can be read as romantic or platonic, it’s not really specified.

The birds never looked so free. A small flock flew above you in the typical ‘v’ form. Sasha said they do that to keep track of each other. To keep each other safe while migrating and make sure no one gets left behind. Were they ducks? No, no, they had to be crows. Maybe they’re- who cares?

You’re mind was fuzzy.

Vision was blurry.

And of course it had to be raining.

But… the sun was out and the sky was clear.

Then why was water running down your face? The slow tickle of the liquid trailed down your face and down your jaw until it fell on your white pants.

Blood.

Oh. That explains it.

How long have you been out here? What time was it.. what day was it?

The ringing in your ear slowly dissipates and your vision starts to clear. You’re sitting down.

Why? Captain Levi gave you and the rest of his squad orders to stop the Female Titan. This isn’t making any sense.

Where was Petra? Eld?

God, your head hurts.

Maybe they found their flock of birds and flew to safety? But without you?

Nothing makes sense.

All you can see are trees, granted you can’t even move your head around fully. But, the Scouts are in titan territory, this was no time to be sitting.

You try to move your legs that sprawled in front of you, but the small movement makes you release a strangled cry.

Oh. It’s all coming back now.

Your squad, no, Levi’s squad… they’re all gone.

The female Titan elbowed you while going after the others. You must’ve hit the tree and only suffered a few broken bones before you went unconscious.

Perfect.

The sun was starting to get lower in the sky and you realize the scouts must’ve made their way back hours ago.

A small and bitter laugh escaped you. This is how you die? Alone and surrounded by the corpses of your comrades? What a sick world.

Maybe, just maybe if you close your eyes, you won’t wake up. The painful yearning for death in your sleep was no more than a miracle. And miracles don’t happen. Not in this life.

No, a Titan is bound to grab you at any moment, squeezing your body in its hand until your bones crack and blood is pouring out of your mouth. Death only comes once its teeth bite down on your skull.

That’s how you’re supposed to die.

Then why weren’t there any titans?

Not that you minded, but it was very peculiar. This was prime Titan country and you should’ve been dead before you’ve even woken up.

A faint noise catches your attention. That sounds like… odm gear.

With your rotten luck, they’ll fly past you, not noticing you’re still alive. Thin tears leaked from your dehydrated body. You’ll have to suffer a cold night by yourself, then get plucked off the ground by a Titan once dawn approaches. If you’re lucky, you’ll die during the night.

“Captain!”

A voice shouted out as the odm gear sounded a lot closer now. It was a female voice.

Was it Krista? No, her voice is too soft.

Sasha? No, it couldn’t be.

“Captain, they’re alive!”

Oh, it was Mikasa. She was cool.

Thumps and the sound of the twigs and leaves snapping as the two made their way over to you.

Which Captain was it?

Wait, wasn’t there only one Captain?

Yes, he wasn’t just your Captain, he was your squad leader.

Your head tilted to the side and through half-lidded eyes, you saw Captain Levi standing there in shock. Mikasa quickly rushes over to you and scans you for any lethal wounds.

“T-they hit their head pretty hard it looks like.” She says with tears brimming her eyes. Levi finally snaps out of it and remembers his authority.

“Scan the area for any Titans until I get them on one of the branches.” Levi crouches down in front of you as Mikasa leaves. “Hey, hey, can you hear me?”

His hands carefully grasp at your face to steady your head. “Y/l/n, I asked you a question.” Your eyes locked with his. The sharp grey eyes bore into yours just like so many other times, but this time you could tell there was a sense of longing and concern within them. Your hand reaches out to grasp the wings of freedom patch on the shoulder of his jacket.

That’s when your emotions took over. Tears leaked from your eyes and you gave out a cry. “I’m s-so sorry, Captain. We t-tried to stop her.”

The disappointment in yourself rang through your body. You were still alive. Everyone else was dead. So why you? You were the first one down and couldn’t even follow your captains orders.

“Shut the hell up.” Levi interrupts your thoughts.

“You’re alive. That’s all that matters.” He breathes out and rests his forehead on yours. “Thank god.”

More tears. “B-but the others-”

“We can mourn when we’re all safe. Right now, we have to get you out of here.”

Levi takes out a roll of bandages and starts to bind them against your head wound. “Don’t die on me yet, kid.”

“I’m only a few years younger than you.” You gave him a weak smile.

“Save your energy, brat.”

There’s the Captain you know.

Once he bandages your wounds, he sets his arms under you to carry you. You let out a small cry at the movement of your leg.

“Shit.” He mutters and moves to take off his cloak. “There’s nothing I can do for the pain. Just hold on until we can get to the wagons.”

“Okay.”

His thumb wipes away a few of your tears and he rips a strip off his cloak and rolls it up. “We can’t have that loud mouth of yours attracting more of those ugly bastards.” He hold it up to your mouth.

“Bite.”

The cloth is pressed between your teeth and acts as a bite guard.

You couldn’t help the muffled groans of pain as he lifted your body up. He tied more pieces of his cloak around you both to act as a harness so you were strapped to his back.

“You alright?” Levi asked once he stood up. He only got a muffled grunt in response.

Without another word, he took off into the trees.

“Mikasa, let’s go! We’re meeting up with the others.”

The other scout soon joined you two and she gave you a worried glance.

Your arms were limply resting around Levi’s neck as he moved and your head turns to the side.

Birds flew next to you.

“To keep each other safe.” Sasha’s voice rang out in your head. “When my dad was teaching me to hunt, I always wondered why birds flew like that, too.”

“Aw, so they’re looking out for each other?” You asked, splitting your slice of bread in half and handing it to her. “That’s cute.”

She eagerly took it, “Yeah! It’s to make sure no one gets left behind and makes communicating easier.”

Who knew one of Sasha’s old stories would play through your mind at a time like this.

Levi landed on his horse and was careful with you and his own injured leg. The forest was becoming smaller and you could see the walls in the distance.

You’re gonna be okay.

Levi’s hand gripped both of yours around his neck and he held the reigns in the other.

Sorry fate, you weren’t getting left behind this time. Maybe miracles do happen. You might have lost some along the way, but the birds must stick together, especially in this world.

———

Taglist: @laylasbunbunny @sad-darksoul @cullenswife

(If you wanna be added or removed, lmk!!)

#aot x reader #aot imagines #attack on titan #levi ackerman #aot drabbles #levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #levi headcanons #levi angst #aot angst #aot x gender neutral reader #levi x reader angst #levi x gn!reader

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hanjisungslag · 1 month

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Headcanons for when aot men get jealous? Maybe seeing reader and someone else spending time together and getting agitated and then dragging them away - ‘Pay attention to me not them.’ sort of vibe.

💢 aot men & jealously

characters included: eren, armin, connie, jean, reiner, bertolt, erwin and levi.

notes: this ask had me floored.

☆ eren jaeger

he caught you and reiner talking to each other AGAIN.

this has happened one too many times and eren finally loses it.

he’d definitely say something like “what about spending time with your boyfriend instead of him, hm?”

very temperamental about the whole thing..

one second he’ll be furious, next he’ll be sad, next he’ll be happy you’re back to spending time with each other

but mostly angry over it.

he storms over and pushes reiner away from you as he comes between the both of you, “what the fuck do you think you’re doing with MY partner?” eren asked threateningly “woah eren we were just—” but before reiner could say anything, eren grabbed your arm and stormed off with you.

☆ armin arlert

you and jean are very close friends

too close, your boyfriend may say.

armin usually lets things slide at first, he doesn’t want to come off as overbearing or jealous

also you and jean are just friends at the end of the day, right?

but one day, you and jean are laughing away as usual and armin asks what’s so funny and you say..

“oh, it’s an inside joke. you wouldn’t get it.”

after you said this, you continued to laugh. but armin had reached his breaking point, he slammed his hands on the dinner table and rose from his seat turning to face you, “y/n. get up.” your smile drops as you also get up from your chair. you two walk out the dinner hall. armin quickly speaks up “pay attention to me, not him.”

☆ connie springer

you and berty boy were spending wayyy too much quality time together.

making you spend less time with your own boyfriend!

connie obviously took this to heart and had to do what a man’s gotta do

aka pull a prank on bert.

every single day for like 2 weeks, connie would do something just to cause him inconvenience.

just like hiding his things right before practice, stealing food off his plate, replacing his sugar with salt, messing up his laundry etc.

but now what was connie going to do with you? after he pulled one of his pranks on bert he saw you HELPING him so not only do you spend all your time with him but now you’re ruining connie’s revenge plan? nope, not happening. he slams bert’s door open not taking any notice that the both of you are trying to talk to him, he just grabs you and pulls you into the hall. “last time i checked, i was your boyfriend. so, stop acting like bert is.”

☆ jean kirstein

there was someone in the survey corps who clearly had a thing for you

but you didn’t seem to notice. supposedly.

anyways, you guys would spend quite a bit of time together especially during expeditions.

jean obviously took offence to this and what does he do?

showboats🗣️🗣️

while on an expedition, you and this guy were chatting away, killing titans, all the usual stuff. but little did you know, from the back, jean was watching all of this happening and he was getting pissed off. his anger built up so much that when it came to killing the titans be whipped out half of them on his own. everyone was super impressed and the girls started complimenting you for having such a strong, brave boyfriend.

he pulls you aside afterwards and says “that was because of you and him, you know? so, you better start paying more attention to me now.”

☆ reiner braun

there was this one guy from garrisons who adored you!

and you thought he was sweet and you’d always try and catch up with him when you could.

which reiner would say was too often.

reiner would definitely intimidate this guy with how huge he is.

it’d be intimidating even reiner wasnt massive because he was just a garrison.

he’d pump his chest out more and wrap his big arms around you in front of him to prove how much bigger and better he was.

and when it came to you, he was so mad. as you stepped away from the garrison guy, he took his arm off of you and grabbed you by the shoulders turning you to face him. “hey. you better stop talking to that fucking whimp. i’m your boyfriend.”

☆ bertolt hoover

you and connie were super close.

you both trained together, love pulling pranks and just bounce off each other so well.

some people sometimes even think you’re a couple..!

but you already have a boyfriend.

bert doesn’t like to speak up about how he feels for a while until something really tips him over the edge.

bert always used to ignore how close you and connie were, he was too shy to say anything in the first place but he also didn’t want to ruin your guys’ relationship by being jealous. that was until someone asked if you and connie were a couple. that was his final straw. he calmly walked over to you but grabbed you with a grip you wouldn’t expect from bertolt. you found yourself outside with him where he looks you dead in the eyes “unless you actually want connie to be your boyfriend, you better start paying more attention to me, y/n.”

☆ levi ackerman

you mostly worked in the offices after a bad injury.

and there was this one librarian who really took a liking to you.

but, you’re already coupled up with mr. ackerman.

levi sees you guys talking all the time. sees that you’re in the library quite a lot even when you don’t need to be.

because of this he delegated menial work to him and even you, when he’s feel mean.

but when he catches you STILL talking while doing the tasks he set for you, he loses it.

you got distracted from your task when your little librarian friend starts discussing this ancient book he discovered the other day and as you were chatting away, you heard the door creak.. you jump out of your skin, trying to return to your task but it was too late. levi had already seen you. he calmly marched towards you and pulls you away to the other end of the library “is that what i said your task was, y/n? come here, i got a better task for you like helping your boyfriend. not this cretin.”

( however at the end of the week when things were all cleared up and you ask him about it he just says “me? jealous? no, i wasn’t.” )

☆ erwin smith

you and mike were working a little too closely lately.

erwin saw the way mike looked at you longingly

at first he thought it was nothing, he wasn’t even jealous!

until mike starts getting more physical

a shoulder brush here, a slight hand touch there

after this, he fully loses it.

erwin side eyes you and mine when he sees his hand gently brush up against yours, it could be pure accident but erwin couldn’t care less. he had gone too far. he marched over tall and mighty and swiftly stole you from mike “i’m the only man who gets to do that to you, you hear me?”

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pennylanewrites · 11 months

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[love in the dark] levi ackerman x f!reader

cw + what to expect: angsty levi thinking he’s not good enough for you, self deprecation, talks of a family and kids, nudity (not sexual), brief mentions of battle scars, swearing, jealousy, alcohol consumption, eventual comfort

levi hated everything he loved about you. you were so loud and talkative and bubbly. always smiling, despite the chaos around you. always caring and laughing and mumbling made-up melodies.

he hated that other people loved those parts of you too. he hated the way erwin would light up when you entered the room, that he somehow found ways to spend more time than needed with you, that hange would tease him playfully about his crush on you, a simple cadet.

but what he hated the most was that he couldn’t speak. he couldn’t kick the living shit out of erwin and punch hange’s stupid face, scream how much he loves you.

because you were a cadet. levi was a captain. it was so inappropriate, him breaking every possible rule and code of honour to be with you.

today was a very bad day. many scouts had lost their lives in an expedition to capture two titans for research. the remaining ones needed an uplift, erwin thought. and now squad leaders, captains, scouts and the fucking commander were sitting in a circle drinking wine.

you couldn’t handle your alcohol. levi was the first person to introduce you to wine, and then whiskey. that was also the first time levi felt old. how young were you that you had never tasted alcohol before?

he smiled to himself at the memory, but the smile faltered when he looked up to see erwin helping you to a couch. you gracefully thanked your commander, slightly embarrassed at how dizzy you were. petra, your friend, looked between you and the commander, giving you a suggestive wiggle of the brows. that didn’t go unnoticed by your captain, whose hand slipped as he poured wine in petra’s glass, turning her white pants a pale hue of red.

something snapped inside of levi as he drank glass after glass of sweet red wine. erwin had so much to offer to you. money, a home, a family. you were listening intently as erwin explained the rules of a card game to you, peering over his shoulder as you sat on the couch and he on the floor.

don’t let your head fall on his shoulder. don’t let your-

a gasp came from levi’s left. of course it was fucking hange.

“i must be boring you.” erwin chuckled when he realised you were falling asleep. “i’ll take you to your dorm.” levi reached the couch with two big steps, protectively standing between you and erwin as you got up.

“i’ll take her.” he was throwing daggers at erwin with his gray eyes, and erwin was surprisingly returning the gaze.

“you don’t have to, captain. take your rest today.” erwin was not giving it up. he gave levi a pleading look, as if saying let me have this, friend.

you’re not my fucking friend, replied levi.

“she’s my soldier, erwin.” you pulled on levi’s jacket, after making sure no one saw. a silent please stop. “lead the way, cadet. you can walk, i assume.” he was cold. more than usual, barely letting you say your good nights to the room.

was he mad at you? you weren’t the one making advances, it was erwin. you didn’t know how to politely turn your commander down, nor did the alcohol running through your veins allow you to.

“your room is that way, is it not?” levi stopped sharply, making you hit his back.

“levi,” when had you ever slept in your room the last two years? “are you mad at me?”

he sighed and turned around, still alert for any guards, or even worse, erwin and hange showing up.

“you’re drunk.” was all he said before walking again, signaling for you to follow. he was silent the rest of the way, silent as he stepped out of his clothes, silent as he grabbed a towel.

“can we take a bath together?” you asked hopefully. deep down you had a feeling he would turn you down. levi was always sour after failed expeditions.

“i want to go to sleep tonight, you take too damn long in the bath.” he was right, but the way he said it made it sound like he was accusing you of being a serial killer.

“okay. you go then, i showered before.” you smiled softly and started taking your clothes off to lay on the clean linen sheets.

levi thought about tonight over and over as he sat in the hot water. he didn’t mean to snap at you, or be so mean. he was pushing you away and into erwin’s arms.

erwin could give you the world. levi could not.

and you deserved the damn world.

he couldn’t help but smile when he saw you taking up the entirety of the bed, stark naked, like you always did.

he loved everything about your body. every curve, every dip, every beauty mark. he loved the healed pink scars on your legs and back, he loved kissing them and caressing them every time you cried that they were ghastly.

he hated what he was about to do.

“don’t you dare.” your voice was quavering. you didn’t dare look away from the ceiling.

“dare what?” levi put his boxers on and tried pushing you to the wall so he could lie down. why are you crying?

“do what you’re about to do, levi.” you moved so he could sit next to you and you both rested your backs on the cold wall.

“if you know what i’m about to do, you also know why.”

“oh, eyebrows is flirting with my girlfriend. time to ruin a perfectly fine two-year relationship.” you were mocking him. he was almost mad at you, but you were trying so hard not to cry.

“that’s not it.” he muttered. god, he hated talking about these things. “i can’t…”

i can’t give you enough.

“can’t what, levi? can’t love me anymore?”

“i can’t be what you need.” he sighed and turned away. why the fuck were his eyes burning and watering now?

“what are you talking about?”

“do you want kids, y/n?”

you let out a surprised laugh.

“levi-”

“do you?”

“well, yeah. not for like, ten years, but sure.”

“there you have it.”

“what, are you impotent or something?” you tried making light of the situation, because truly, you had no idea how to approach this. so you resorted to humour, hoping levi would snap out of it too.

“no, i’m just not cut out for that family crap.” he was standing up and walking around the room now, and he was making you dizzy. “erwin is, though. erwin wants a family and three children, did you know?”

you did know. you still shook your head no.

“and he has money to raise them. hell, he has a house in the countryside, and servants.”

“well, good for him. i hope he finds a wife soon.”

“are you fucking stupid, y/n?” you hated when he talked like that. “you’re 22 years old, god damn it!”

“so?”

“other women your age are already married and have a second kid on the way. not wasting their days away fighting titans, risking their lives!”

“i didn’t join the scouts to find a husband, levi!” you were crying. god, he hated it so much. what was he even doing. levi regretted ever opening his mouth.

“don’t you understand, erwin is your way out! you’re wasting your time with me. your life.”

“levi…” now you finally understood. it wasn’t that he was jealous of erwin flirting with you. well, that too, but he was jealous of the life erwin was living. “levi, i love you.”

“y/n, i really don’t know what you’re doing with me.” he was sitting down on the edge of the bed, his back to you. you shifted on the bed, until your legs were around his and your cheek resting on his back.

“i know you don’t get it, but you’re giving me exactly what i need.”

“and what is that?”

your hand fell on top of his, and you intertwined your fingers before he could take it away.

“you give me life, levi. and that’s more than i could ask for. i know you’re scared that you’ll die, or i will, but that’s our purpose. i joined the scouts knowing the risks.”

“i just want you to live properly. peacefully.”

“so be my peace.” you whispered in his ear and got up, sitting down again on his lap. “and don’t ever think you’re not good enough for me.”

“i know i’m not, y/n.”

“i don’t care, then. i love you, i don’t want to lose this, ever. i don’t care that i’m too young, or at child-bearing age or whatever other stupid crap you’ll come up with.” he smiled softly at you, letting his forehead fall against yours.

“promise you won’t die, then?” you giggled and kissed the tip of his nose before replying.

“i promise.”

“i love you.”

“good. don’t ever do that shit again, levi.”

“don’t swear.” he muttered and guided you to lie down, still on top of him. you could feel your heartbeats turn to one as you lay in silence. “i’m sorry, y/n.”

“that’s okay. just know i wouldn’t trade you for anything. for anyone.”

“really?” his arms tightened around you. a form of saying, me neither. you’re my everything.

“yeah, i like my men to have thin eyebrows.”

#aot x reader #attack on titan x reader #attack on titan #levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #levi x reader angst #levi ackerman angst #levi x reader fluff #captain levi #levi ackerman fluff #aot fluff #aot angst #attack on titan angst #attack on titan fluff #aot x reader angst #aot x reader fluff #attack on titan levi

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chrollohearttags · 5 months

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THEY DON’T KNOW | e. jaeger

synopsis: your life and relationship in the spotlight seemed nothing short of perfect..that was until everyone else convinced you otherwise.

content + themes: slight angst, engagement/proposal, musician eren x influencer reader ofc, fluff, drama, mentions of infidelity, kissing, brief mentions of suggestive things, nothing heavy, just a sweet story for my favorite ship

word count: 3.2K

📝: this is for my sweet @honeybleed ‘s 90-00’s R&B collab event! (I’m a little late to the party, I’m so sorry about that! 😭) Congratulations to you again on 600, my love. You deserve every bit and so much more!

SONG 🎧: They Don’t Know • Jon B.

* . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•|☆•° .** . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•|☆•° .** . °•★|•°∵ ∵°•

noise…it all seemed so much louder than usual nowadays. Everything sounded so much more amplified now matter how hard you fought to drown it out. The music thudding from the speakers on stages that you danced on, the rain droplets splattering against your window pane and lately…the opinions of every envious naysayer and supposed friend alike.

Telling you that your relationship was a moot point. A mere sham and that in due time, it’d come crumbling to its core. Regardless how strong the foundation was between the two of you, outside forces could still cause it to shatter at any moment. But that was only if you allowed it. You couldn’t escape it either…every other scroll and headline on every media outlet was a photo of you two..some flashy shot of you two kissing and holding hands. Appearing happily in love, only to be followed by droves of comments full of negative and downright nasty things about you guys. Saying that it would never work and you were only a temporary thing who ‘just so happened to make it further than the rest..’ it certainly wasn’t a vote of confidence considering you were about to spend the rest of your life together. For the better part of three years, you had come to know and love the renowned artist, EJ the Don. A man who’s music transcended all of time and pushed boundaries..a generational talent with exceptional skill. At least those were the words used to describe him by a plethora of magazines over the years. On the contrary, others would acclaim that he was a bit of a playboy. That he hurt people at will with no regard for their feelings..sabotaging relationships purposefully so that he was no longer bound to them. He didn’t care about anyone other than himself.

However, you knew otherwise. EJ, as far as you were concerned, was an entirely different entity of itself. You had fallen for Eren..the man who’d leave the studio at night tired and exhausted but still managed to have fresh flowers and your favorite treats in hand. The man who’d curl up with you on rainy days and binge movies. The Eren you loved would comfort you relentlessly until you were far batter. Making you laugh and cheer up with the dumbest jokes..that’s the kind of person he was. So it came without question, when one night on the rooftop of a hotel in Greece; surrounded by fluorescent blue lights, a lavish table filled with wine and rose petals next to the serene pool waters where he asked you to be his wife, you’d immediately accept. Saying yes faster than he could get the proposal out. You were elated to not only spend the rest of your life with him but share the exciting news with the world and those you loved. To your surprise though, you weren’t met with the warm reception that you had pictured in your head.

once the announcement came, the rumors followed and there was no escaping them. Even so called friends were hesitant. Telling you that he used to go with this model and date this girl so it was best to watch out. Some even suggested calling the whole thing off to spare you from future heartache...and you’d be lying if you said that they hadn’t worn you down. That you hadn’t wondered if there was a bit of truth to them. But if there was anything he was dedicated to doing, it was setting your mind at ease and proving all of them wrong.

“…room for one more?”

the voice ringing from earshot and sending flutters throughout the pit of your belly. You’d flip over onto your side with a faint beam as your fiancé made his way over to you. “For you? Anytime..” Kneeling into the mattress as he brushes a hand along your bare shoulder blade, leaning forward to place a kiss on your temple. It seemed that the effects of the dreary, rainy day had taken its toll on him as well. Sporting a pair of sweats and a tank top, indicating that he was finished with his work for the day and ready to relax with the one person who brought him serenity. Ironically, there was something rather tranquil about weather like this..whereas most people saw it as something negative; a literal damper in their plans, some took it as an opportunity to purify themselves. Not so much in a literal regard but it was perfect to just lie here and let all of those feelings that normally wouldn’t make their way to the forefront be known. Coiling one of those toned, tattooed arms around (y/n)’s covered torso, Eren began to mumble into your skin..simultaneously leaving gentle pecks along your arm. “This rain kinda sucks, doesn’t it? It’s so depressing..” “..yeah..it is.” The dryness in your response caused an immediate alarm for your fiancé. That was the thing with Eren..even when it seemed as if he were completely nonchalant and not paying you much attention, he focused on the smallest details and kept note.

there were things about you that he had noticed early on in your relationship and still to this day, could remember them better than you could. “I see it’s already working on someone…” making an attempt at a light hearted joke and even smirking afterwards, hoping that his humor would bring at least a faint smile to your face. He hated seeing you like this..hated knowing that something was obviously bothering you and you wouldn’t tell him the cause. In fact, he picked up on it three days ago when he saw you sitting outside near the pool, glaring off into space at what seemed to be nothing. In the same regard, he wasn’t the type to pry..he knew how irksome he felt when someone pestered him so he figured it best to wait for an opportune moment to confront you. Now seemed like as good of a time as any. He never did well with communicating his feelings either so he used jokes and humor as a means to break the proverbial ice. But luckily, he wouldn’t need some awkward segway because you’d ask him something that would make his stomach turn.

“..do you think we did the right thing?”

admittedly and rightfully so, he was a little confused. What ‘right thing’ were you referring to exactly?

“As in what?”

“Getting engaged..moving in together. Are we really meant to be here?” The words seemed to be spilling from between your lips as if they had been sitting there for quite some time. It was a little insulting nonetheless. As if you had waited for this exact moment. But he’d be lying if he said that they hadn’t stung a bit. He figured the two of you were equally yoked and on the same page. Happy to be marrying your forever person. At least that’s what he felt..were you having doubts? Did you not love him as much as he loved you? What had he done wrong? Swallowing the hard lump that had instantly formed in his throat, Eren proceeded to ask questions, seeing if he could maybe get through to you to figure out what was wrong.

“Is there something that would make you think different? I mean, personally..I’ve never been so sure about anything in my life. Honestly, it still doesn’t feel real..”

for a moment, he began to reminisce on the moments leading up to the night he popped the question. Searching relentlessly for the perfect ring..enlisting the help of his best friends and even your girls to ensure that it was one that you’d love. He took extra special care to make the night unforgettable. Eren had even flown to go see his mom to ask for the gift she had given him years ago that he now wanted to give to you..if that wasn’t enough, he’d even taken you to your granny’s grave and asked for her blessing of sorts. He was a wreck, even crying because he was so happy and wanted her to know that he’d take care of you from now on..for the first time in his young twenty seven years, he was truly grateful and he wanted nothing more than to be the ideal man for you. A husband that you’d be proud of..one that you bragged to your friends about over lunch, one that you’d dip out on plans early to get back to. That was the type of relationship he had envisioned; one where nothing else mattered when you two were together. Now it seemed that you were having reservations..

“I’m so scared…” Just then, the sounds of your words were muddled by whimpers. He had no idea that you were this conflicted by the matter..and if so, why not say something?! Flipping you over, he’d be met with your beautiful brown eyes that always seemed to burst with love and excitement were welling with tears that were only moments from spilling. Brushing your cheek, Eren gazed upon you with a worried expression over taking his face. How could he have been so dumb?..here you were hurting and he hadn’t even clocked it. “Why, baby? I don’t understand..of what?” Truth was, you were afraid of marriage in general but even more so, if not being what you envisioned. You were afraid of things not being picturesque and perfect. That you’d wake up one day and end up just like the rest of the girls he’d supposedly dumped. Discarded to the wayside after he grew tired of them. You didn’t want everyone to be right about the two of you! Another passed around Instagram model with nothing of substance to offer, a philandering rapper with commitment issues..the headlines were certain to be brutal. But above all else..you only wanted to do this once. You only ever wanted to walk down that aisle one time in your life. You loved this man more than anything in this world so the last thing you wanted was to take his hand in marriage only to be sliding that ring off a few years down the road. It was a sacred thing and you never wanted to lose sight of that.

“Of this..of us not working out. I mean, I love you so much and there’s nothing I want more than to be your wife but everywhere I turn, it seems like somebody wants the opposite. As if we’re not meant to be. I thought everyone would’ve been as happy as we are. But it’s always something..”

granted, he was no stranger to the gossip either. Between his fangirls and the blogs, they wouldn’t give you a break. They were furious that someone had snatched up their precious EJ and it was some girl who seemingly came out of nowhere. According to them, you weren’t his type, you couldn’t possibly love him the way he deserved and there were at least ten other women who were more fit to take your position. It was insane. Although he was never much for social media and its sick antics, he’d done his fair share of defense for you. Which spoke volumes. After a while, he rid himself of all accounts and focused solely on you. Despite it being how you made your living, he wished you’d do the same. He couldn’t imagine petty accusations with zero basis being the reason that he lost you. It would crush him, truly. Even so, he’d done as he always had at times like these and pulled you close to his chest, swaddled you in those muscular arms and peppered your forehead with gentle kisses.

“Do you remember the first night we met? At the club?” It seemed like such an odd time to be going down memory lane but that’s how Eren was..he could tolerate a lot of things but seeing you cry was not one of them. So he wanted to try a different approach.

“I couldn’t forget. I had such a good time..”

“So did I..hell, I was so nervous around you, I almost messed up my whole performance that night.” The two of you break into a small fit of laughter as you look back on the antics of your earlier days together. The wild nights, the hookups, the tension leading up to you making things official..it was all a journey. You’d find yourself giggling as he held you close to him. You seemed far more comfortable and vulnerable now; able to express your feelings more freely. Which was a great thing for him.

“Please..I couldn’t even concentrate. You kept teasing me and shit. I don’t know how I made it through that without embarrassing myself.” But alas, he’d think it was cute. Watching you stumble over your words, seeing you squeeze your thighs together when he switched up those steamier lyrics to fit you and when he ran a finger underneath your chin, you nearly collapsed! Being on stage with your celebrity crush was not for the weak..

“Yeah, but you did and do you remember what everyone was saying after that? All the bullshit they said about us?” It was something you’d never forget, truthfully. For days after, the infamous photo of you guys hugged up on a lounge couch in the VIP section circulated the web for an entire week. There were countless headlines, alleging that you two were an item, that you were hooking up..the game of telephone had become so terrible that three days later, stan accounts and grown adults alike had concocted stories of you two having sex backstage and him doing inappropriate things right there in front of everyone. Even so called ‘witnesses’ backed up the claims. Naturally, all of it was false but it still didn’t stop people from running with whatever narrative they saw fit. Despite the fact that prior to that appearance, you’d never ever laid eyes on this man, less known did all of the things they accused you of. You were complete strangers..again, it stopped no one’s rumor mill from running!

“Yeah..I do. All of it just sounded like people had too much time on their hands.”

but his point wasn’t quite driven home yet..still clutching you, he’d chuckle once more and just nod. “Mhm..and what about when we first started dating? Remember the dumb shit they said then?” Once again, you’d answer his question, giggling when you recalled how stupid it all was. From the accusations of him being nothing more than a pay pig for some lavish lifestyle they claimed you were flexing online. Or that he wasn’t really faithful because he did a show with a former ‘partner’, who was nothing more than a PR stunt to begin with. Nevermind the fact that she was a lesbian! “Like when they said you were cheating on me with your ex? Trust me, I couldn’t escape that one even if I wanted to.” “Which was crazy because she was way more interested in you than me. Even asked me for your number..” seeing his expression furrow into a silly pout and you couldn’t hold it together another second. You’d burst into laughter at the thought. “I’m serious! She got mad because I didn’t bring you with me..must think I’m stupid or sum’. Little Miss Hoes always pulled more girls than I ever could.” The mental image of a one hundred thirty pound, five foot four blonde stealing his potential prospects had you rolling around and in much better spirits. “You’re a mess, you know that?” Which was his one and only goal.

“Well I’m glad somebody found my lack of game funny.” But truthfully, the only woman he wanted was right here. Which was the entire point of this little roundabout trip down memory lane..it didn’t matter what happened back then or what people claimed to know about him..he only cared about what was to come. The life, the future that he was building with you trumped over anything that they could say. They didn’t know how drastically he had changed for you. How he was hopelessly in love..how much softer and compassionate he had become so he was a better man for you. Even when you weren’t around, his beloved (y/n) was the topic of conversation..oftentimes, his boys would make fun of him for how much of a ‘simp’ he had grown to be. How his voice changed in pitch when you were on the phone, his eyes radiating whilst talking to you..it was the cutest thing! So if there was one thing he knew for certain, it was that he was all in. He had no regrets or doubts about asking you to marry him. He was ready. Anybody from his past was a mere afterthought and he wasn’t missing out. All he could do was pray that you felt the same. Turning your head towards him, EJ looked you directly in the eyes and began to speak.

“Listen, princess..I know it isn’t easy. Being with someone like me. I’m not perfect..not by a long shot. Truth is, I was really selfish back in the day. I wasn’t thinking about anybody but myself. Hell, until you came along, I still didn’t. I had always told myself I’d never let anyone get close to me just so I didn’t have to worry about another person. Marriage, dating..seemed like a foreign concept to me..” this was the first time in his life where he was able to be vulnerable..where he could lay all of his emotions bare. Intertwining your fingers together, Eren pulled them close and placed gentle kisses across your knuckles. A comforting tactic for the both of you.

“But right now...there’s nothing else I want more than to be your husband. To keep making more of these memories..(Y/N), I couldn’t imagine doing this without you. I can’t take back what I’ve done or who I was. And I’m so sorry that you’ve had to be on the receiving end of it. But I don’t care about what happened back then or what they say about us. I love you..I love you so damn much. Please believe me when I say that.” By this point, faint traces of tears began to stream once more. You were no longer sad, hurt or worried but rather..relieved. Relieved that his heart was equally devoted to this as yours. You’d do whatever it took to make this work. Outside interferences and opinions aside..

“And I love you more, Eren. I promise, I won’t let anything or anyone come between us.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

No relationship was ideal and obviously, just like rainy days, bad ones were guaranteed as well but you could always weather the storm as long as you were together..

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honeybleed · 5 months

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— ★ JUST A LITTLE WHILE // JEAN KIRSTEIN

content & warnings: comic book artist!jean, modern au, female reader, black-coded reader, established relationship, angst kinda but fluff, smut so mdni (breast play, vaginal fingering, oral, f. receiving)

author’s note: i always wanted to write sumn dat gives kdrama ost so lets hope this gave obashata 🏹 n i always complain i hate everythin i write for jean so i hope i don’t hate dis

word count: 2.5k

Jean's studio was an array of things.

One wall with comic book covers and vintage sci-fi posters, the other adorned with sketches, character studies and concept art.

Sat by the drafting table, which was scattered with pencils, inking pens, and a meticulously organised array of reference materials.

Sticky notes on the bookcases that practically groaned with the heavy weight of the collection of comic books, graphic novels, and rare editions, meticulously organised and catalogued.

With his hands on his head, Jean let out a deep sigh as the sketches lay in front of him on his desk.

Despite such a critical thing left to do, the only thing on his mind was you.

Things were slightly off, to say the least. With the upcoming finale of his series, Jean was more distant than ever. It had been a long six years.

Most comic book series span decades, but quite frankly he'd run out of steam.

This was a story he loved dearly, and the last thing he wanted was for it to get taken away by the publishing company and morph into something unrecognisable and soulless.

So he'd end it himself. And the pressure to create a satisfying conclusion was immense. He felt as if he was wading through a swamp of problems and sinking.

It had to honor the journey of the series, it needed to respect the investment of the audience and leave a lasting impression that resonated even after the final chapter.

It'd been three weeks since he began the finale saga and you were an understanding girlfriend.

You'd drop by once in a while to check if he ate or needed some fresh air or even some downtime away from it. In the first few days, it was alright and he obliged.

But later on, he just couldn't bring himself to even take a five-minute break. The constant barraging phone calls from the editors and staff made Jean struggle to even breathe sometimes.

He was overwhelmed. Everything was closing in on him, and as much as he gave his all it seemed like his integrity as a storyteller was slipping from his grasp.

Suddenly his ears pricked up at the sound of the keyhole of the front door jiggling and some footsteps as the door closed.

He’d been at the drafting table for hours, and he could feel it. Eyes strained and dry, neck and shoulders stiff and achy.

He made his way to the hallways where you were taking off your shoes to place on the rack as you gave him a small smile.

“Hi.” You chirped. “You good?”

“No.” He thought to himself.

“So-so.” He snorted as he stretched his arms with a groan.

Involuntarily your eyes settled on his rising black t-shirt, which showcased the sliver of skin of his pelvis and his happy trail.

“Pervert.” He snickered, humored at the fact you were shamelessly ogling him, as he grabbed the takeout bag from your hands and headed to the kitchen.

“Am not!” You snapped, following after him.

"Here...open this." Jean says as he averts his gaze, unable to meet your eyes pushing the envelope in your hands.

"Okay.." You respond with an uneasy laugh at his skittish behavior.

"Open it now." He says, a little demandingly.

"Jean, can't you see that's what I'm doing?" You snap, kissing your teeth.

Despite the bite in your tone, your teeth sank into your lower lip to stifle back a laugh. Jean with his towering figure acting like a shy toddler was amusing.

You grab a knife to tear open the top of the envelope and see a pristine white paper neatly folded. You made your way to slump on the dining chair as he stood, leaning against the marble countertop in your kitchen.

You unfolded it to see a drawing of a couple.

But surrounding the couple were six mini versions of the two of you.

In the middle, it was undeniably Jean, with his sandy brown mullet, upward-curved ends, stubble and goatee.

You giggled, as your finger traced along the drawing of him.

He was holding you, kissing your hand gently, and his other hand was firmly planted on your side in the illustration — then there was you. Rich brown skin, bouncy curls, plump lips and doe eyes.

Jean had done many drawings of you in the past but there was something more heartfelt about this particular art.

He could see your eyes were soft, filled with a glow while you gazed at the gift, as he watched you with bated breath.

Anxiety stirred in his stomach as he absentmindedly clenched his jaw, a habit of his when he was feeling uneasy.

You'd never bashed his art, on the contrary, you were probably one of the most supportive people in his career as a comic book artist, but there was always something nerve-wracking about pouring your heart into something for the person you love.

You were in awe of the powdery and soft art. The pastels had a warmth and gentleness, something that was rare in his artwork.

Jean who always fared better in bold lines and vibrant colors. Whose art was always praised for dynamic action scenes and expressive storytelling.

To picture the sheer intimacy of his hands spending time on this artwork, where you could feel the earnestness with the dreamlike lilacs and turquoises caused a tingling warmth to spread through your body.

"This is so...beautiful, Jean..." You finally mustered out, your voice barely a murmur earning a sheepish grin from him as he rubbed the nape of his neck.

“I know it’s tomorrow but…I just couldn’t wait.” He said. “But you really think so...?" He chuckled, but when he saw tears stream down your cheeks he immediately paused feeling his heart sink.

He hurriedly crouched in front of you as he cupped your cheeks, wiping the droplets with the pad of his thumb.

"Why are you cryin', huh?" He chuckled his voice soft but still with a hint of concern as he stroked your cheek. "I hope my drawings ain't that bad." He teased in an attempt to make you laugh.

"No, it’s lovely.” You mumbled. “I just thought you forgot.”

“Look, baby…I know I’ve been acting distant and grumpy lately but it’s not because of you.”

He paused, as he took in your features intently. You felt your stomach flutter as you met the soft, golden glimmers of his light brown eyes.

“It’s just this stupid comic causing me stress. So just promise me that you’ll always be by my side when I need you.” He said with a warm smile, as he pecked your lips and then pressed his forehead against yours.

“Will you promise me that?”

His tender tone stirred up feelings you haven’t felt in a long time.

A mixture of desire for him as your mind was fogged with his familiar warm, woody musk fused with the clean, crisp scent reminiscent of freshly washed linens.

And adoration as the hair on the nape of your neck began to rise. This all-consuming need to reach out and touch him properly. Feel his skin on yours, like you used to.

He called your name to drag you out of your daze.

“Yeah?” You quipped, trying to recompose yourself.

“Thought I’d lost you there, baby.” He chuckled as his sturdy palms and weathered pads of his fingers settled on the bare skin of your waist which made you jolt slightly, as he remained crouched in front of you.

“Promise?”

“Promise.” You affirmed as you slot your pouty lips against his own.

Pattering raindrops gently tapped on the windows as the both of you began to prepare for bed. It was a long time since you slept at similar time.

Jean made it a habit to fall asleep in the studio or even crash on the couch so as not to disturb your deep sleep, despite you chastising him.

He came out of the ensuite bathroom in your bedroom after a shower with a smile. Dried up and dressed for sleep.

As you sauntered up to him for a kiss you could still feel the heat from the hot water emitting from his flush skin, and smell the light citrus scent from the soap he used.

You reached a hand to rake your fingers through the ends of his tousled tawny hair, the droplets sliding down his collarbone.

He pulled you close against him as he gave you a cheeky grin.

“Close your eyes and don't open them until I tell you. Okay?” He said in a tone laced with jest.

You obliged fluttering your eyes closed, just happy he seemed to be returning to the mischievous nature of his you remember when you first met.

Jean meets your lips. This kiss is different to the quick pecks you’ve become accustomed to.

It’s almost as if this kiss won’t end. You feel yourself gasp slightly when he brings his tongue to your mouth. Softly tasting you.

His large hands grasp at you to pull you even more impossibly close as if you aren’t already flush against his firm and solid body.

“That kiss got you raring to go, huh baby?” Jean snickered to himself, a gleam in his eye.

Any time he could make you jump or make a noise, it stroked his ego immensely. One of his less favorable traits but he wore it well sometimes.

Rarely.

“Do you want more?” He murmured in your ear, breath tickling the shell as his voice became husky, which was quickly stirring arousal within you.

The deep baritone of his voice, the tingling of your lips after the wet and heavy kiss that left your lip a little swollen, and the overbearing proximity of him created a deep heat within your gut.

“I have a lot more to give.” He stated, voice firm.

“So do it.” You provoked, and within an instant, you were backing up on the bed until your back hit the headboard of the king-sized bed as Jean’s toned figure hovered over you.

The contrast between the rainy outdoors and the cosy glow indoors, with the dim bedside table lamp made things different.

Though the kisses were lust-filled and hungry at first, when he leaned in to meet your lips once again, the way his breathing was soft and shallow along with the way your eyelashes against each other's skin made it morph into something more sweet.

“Want this off..” He muttered as his tongue danced with yours, tugging at the satin, champagne-colored night dress.

“Jeez, be patient.” You tittered as you sat up from lying down to pull the garment over your head and discard it onto the carpet. “There.”

“Much better…” He chuckled, running his tongue over his lip as he gazed at your bare chest.

His hands began to roam across the soft skin of your body, then settled on your breast, kneading it gently and tweaking your nipple which made you gasp.

Your stomach turned again.

In the glow of the lamp, your boyfriend when aroused has an animalistic look in his eyes. Very rarely. It frightens you at first but also rouses something primitive within you.

He eagerly dived in to kiss you again, but you dodged the kiss. His eyes widened.

“Baby, what’s wrong? Did I do something wrong?” He stuttered, panicky.

“No…but you gotta strip too! Fuck you thought this was.” You giggled.

“Jeez, I was so wrapped up in what was goin’ on in here that I forgot. Alright.” He responded as he began to tug off his boxers, discarding them quickly.

Your eyes descended lower until you gazed upon Jean’s length.

“What’s the matter?” He asked a little sheepishly as he felt anxiety seep into him when you gazed at him wordlessly. “Guess I could use a little trim, mhm?”

“No, it’s fine..” You giggled. “It’s sexy, don’t worry.”

“You think so?” Jean grinned as he ran his hand over his stubbly chin. “Maybe I’ll go full 70s.”

“Jean, you’re sick.” You scoffed.

“I can be a lot worse…” He chuckled as he leaned in, to trail kisses along your soft skin.

“Is that so?” You teased.

“You pushin’ me?”

“Maybe.”

With a wicked grin, Jean slid lower on the bed to position himself between your thighs, prying them apart.

You’d been together a long time but the glistening arousal from Jean’s earlier teasing and ministrations that sheened in the low light made your cheeks heat up.

“I barely touched you, y’know.” He chuckled darkly as his eyes hungrily raked over your thighs and wet heat.

“Shut up!” You protested but were cut off with a squeak as Jean immediately delved between your thighs, wrapping his arms around them as he began to suck and lick at your folds.

“Jean…!” You gasped as he restricted you from squirming with his strength.

“I promise I’ll make you feel so good…” He muttered as his tongue began to take long and languid strokes, losing himself in your centre, drooling and moaning so loud it reverberated against you, which made you even more jumpy.

Your hands threaded his hair as you tugged, bucking your hips against his face. It spurred him on even more, and he slid one finger inside of your entrance, pumping slowly.

His jaw clenched and he groaned at the feeling of your gummy and plush walls, clenching and pulsating around his digits.

“Fuck…” He said with a low growl. “You’re so sensitive.”

He slid two fingers in, which made you mewl pathetically.

You knew you must’ve looked and sounded ridiculous but with the intense pleasure washing over you, you couldn't care less.

“That’s it, baby…” Jean said in response as your name fell from his mouth like a mantra, his fingers curling inside you as he massaged the tip of his tongue on your clit. “Want you to cum for me..”

“Jean…” You cried out weakly, as he was coaxing you nearer and nearer to the edge.

Your eyes squinted shut as you felt your peak reach you, your body shuddering as you gushed all over his fingers.

“So beautiful, baby.” He grinned as he kissed your temple, stroking your hair back, leaning to kiss you gently the tang of your arousal on his lips and tongue.

“You’re so sexy when you cum.” He said as your chest heaved, attempting to catch your breath. He trailed his hand down your body, cupping your breasts to tweak your nipples again.

You smacked his hand away.

“Move.” You chortled.

“This better?” And you shoved him off when he swiped his tongue against your hardened nipple.

“You are so!-” You thumped his chest.

“Hope you’re ready for me, baby.” He smirked as he gazed at you. “Cos I ain’t finished. Think I might just fuck you into the mattress til dawn.”

“Jean…never change.” You chuckled as you squeezed his broad shoulder.

The next morning, Jean was out cold. You glanced over at him where his bare back was facing you and his arms were sprawled over the mattress.

“Wake up…” You called out as you slapped his back.

“What?” He groaned, voice groggy and drowsy.

“Happy anniversary, baby.”

“Don’t wake me up for no stupid shit like that again.” He muttered as his hand slid to caress your thigh and squeeze it.

author’s note: if u made it this far, ty for reading sorry for any grammatical or spelling mistakes love u all, reblogs and interactions r always appreciated 💓✊🏽

#aot x reader #aot smut #jean kirstein x reader #aot x black reader #aot x black!reader #jean kirstein fluff #jean kirstein smut #aot angst #aot fluff #jean x reader #jean kirstein #snk x reader #snk smut #aot x female reader #aot x y/n #⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ nara scribbles

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purrsuit1 · 9 months

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Also I want to make more aot characters in the white void, it feels so heavy 🤍

And I see your replies they are so sweet!!! I’m just a tumblr noobie so I have NO idea how to like or respond to them, I think that feature is locked for me 😭😭 but it means a lot- thank you!!🩷 (Erwin is literally me when I understood I can’t even say thank you personally)

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arminsfavoritepookie · 9 months

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Eren is a nasty man.

He always fucked your pussy hard and desperate, begging for the familiar sensation of your tight, creamy pussy clenching around his dick. You’re gasping and babbling as his cum seeps from in between your thighs—white, sticky, wet cream leaking from what Eren considers his pussy. Eren always gets primal—feral—at the sight of him spreading wet cum on your stomach with the tip of his dick, eyes dazed and completely focused on marking you—his fat pink tip drenched in his own cum, he's moaning as he starts to rub his big dick all on your stomach just out of pure desperation. Eren is a shy, nasty little loner, but that doesn't stop him from holding your thighs open as his tongue slurps and fucks into your little pussy, slurping and licking every drop of cum that coats your soft thighs and drips out your cunt.

And when he's finally done tongue-fucking your pussy, licking up all the juices from your leaking cunt, his mouth is drenched in your slick and his cum—his green eyes always seem to be sparkling almost lost. Eren always blushes at the sight of you, his cheeks turning a brilliant shade of red as he licks the corners of his lips at your fucked-out state. He kisses you so gently yet with intensity that you can taste him—all of him. Your sticky juices mixed with his salty cum on his lips—you can taste all of it on the tip of your tongue.

Eren is a nasty man, but he can't help it when it comes to you.

#eren x reader #aot x you #aot x reader #aot fanfiction #eren x you #eren x black fem!reader #eren jeager x reader #eren jeager x y/n #eren x y/n #eren smut #eren jeager smut #eren headcanons #eren jeager imagines #aot angst #shingeki no kyoujin eren #eren fluff #eren aot #aot x black reader #snk eren

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leviiheichou · 13 days

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You get angry at Levi for something and ignore him for a period of time and he'll get so anxious that he'll literally annoy you till the end of the world, just to hear your voice.

Although he's never admitting that.

#levi thoughts #captain levi #levi #levi ackerman x reader #levi aot #levi attack on titan #levi fanart #levi x you #snk x reader #levi x reader fluff #levi ackerman x you #levi x reader angst #levi angst #angst #angst with a happy ending #aot angst

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tteokdoroki · 1 year

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*ੈ🌩️‧₊˚— the world in your name + eren jaeger.

૮˶ᵕ ༝ᵕ˶ა synopsis — in the quiet of the night, eren realises that he'd destroy the world for you. no matter what universe your love may exist in.

⭑ warnings — please read + mdni ! characters aged up, fluff, angst, childhood friends to lovers, mentions of nightmares, modern!au with some canon references, aot manga spoilers (?), marriage, eren has a son, not beta read ! - fem!reader.

⭑ words — 1.5K.

⭑ notes — hi !! hello its eren's birthday and if you've been on my blog recently you'd know that i'm falling in love w him all over again so... here's a soft lil one-shot for my boy. i miss him, i want him happy again. enjoy! - m.list ✩

“hey, ‘renren. what are you doing out here all by yourself?”

before he even has a chance to respond, you’re slipping a jacket over eren’s shoulders— tucking yourself under his arm since you know that he finds comfort in your body heat.

“nothin’ much,” he leans down to brush his lips over your forehead, taking the time to appease his guilty pleasure as he breathes in the scent of your shea shampoo. “got a little crowded in there. needed the air— plus the stars are out tonight.” he’s making excuses and he has no doubt that you’ll see right through his bullshit. eren can already feel the smile on your face as you bury yourself deeper into his side, your lips brushing up against him from over his clothes.

after a second of selfishly taking him in yourself, you look up— eyes glittering and loving, reading deep into eren’s soul just like they always have, and so easily too. “bullshit.” your voice lays flat but your eyes are amused as you tip toe up to reach eren’s cheek, kissing him there. he finds that cute, that he’s taller than you now and it’s the opposite of when you were growing up. that he’s big enough to protect you where you’d do the same for him as kids. “eren jaeger not wanting to be the centre of attention at his own party? you sick or somethin’ renren?”

“don’t call me that, we’re not kids anymore.” the brunette grimaces even though his heart bristles happily in his chest.

“you don’t even like the stars. you hate being cold.”

“i like them when i’m here.” eren wraps an arm around your waist and turns to face you fully, tugging you into his chest— his forefinger and thumb tilting your head up so he can look at you better. love you a little longer. “with you.”

you roll your eyes, but melt like butter under his touch. “don’t be corny, honey.”

“you love it when i’m corny. you think it’s romantic.” he says and god— there’s that smile again. the one where your eyes crinkle and it raises your cheeks so high, it looks as if you might burst with happiness. your smile, it makes the world turn on its axis, makes the waves it the shore and the leaves fall from trees and mountains crumble into the seas. it fixes everything, it fixes him.

“come back inside, eren. we’re all waiting for you.” your voice is so soft, he can’t help but shut green eyes away as you cup the side of his face with the softness of your palm, letting the tips of your fingers twirl through his chocolate brown locks in a way that makes the stress sag from his body. “our son wants to see you blow out the candles, make a wish before mommy puts him to bed.”

“we’ll put him to bed together. i just—“ eren is so fucking lucky, he’d be a fool not to take that as fact. you’ve given him everything; a happy life, a home, a beautiful son, and all the love he could ever ask for— even after everything he’d been through, everything he’d put you through over the years. he wasn’t the best to you, not always, but you stayed. when his parents died, when the world gave out beneath his feet and he couldn’t stand up on his own. you shouldered his burdens with him even though he wasn’t as half as good to you as he should have been. but he loves you with everything he has and everything he doesn’t.

he sighs in content, brought back to reality when you cup his face with two hands instead of one and he opens his eyes just to see how worried you look. “i’ll be there in a minute. just…stay out here with me for a bit.” eren wraps his hands around your wrists softly, grounding you while you ground him and his unfairly long eyelashes flutter against your gentle palms.

“okay,” you breathe, relieved that he’s back from wherever his mind had taken him. back to you. “another minute. as long as you need, ‘ren.” there’s that pet name again, the one tied to distant memories of summers and melting ice-pops and scraped knees. you’ve known him so long, you still know how to make his heart race and you’d even given him the honour of being called your husband.

eren loves you so much. he wonders if he’s told you that he loves you today or if he’s made you feel as such. you always make him feel loved, you take care of him and your beautiful son a little more than yourself— but he swears he’ll always be there to pick up your pieces if you fall apart like he’s done before. you need looking after too, and eren knows it’s silly but sometimes he holds back on his hurt and anguish because he knows you’ll drop everything to make it go away.

you’re his partner, his wife, his first love, the mother of his child and his equal— but eren won’t let you give away any more pieces of yourself, even if that’s what you’re supposed to do when you love each other. he’ll keep you whole, feed you pieces of himself instead, keep your world spinning because he loves you.

that’s why he doesn’t tell you about the nightmares he’s been having lately. the ones of another world. the ones where he tells you he’d flatten the world for you if you told him to and the one where you look at him as if he’s a monster.

even there, you find it in your heart to love him.

eren doesn’t tell you about the nightmares because he knows that in this life, if he had that same power… he’d flatten the world for you and your son— he’d do anything to keep you safe and happy. rip stars from the sky and buildings along with them, trample the earth until everything has no choice but to start anew. that’s how much he’d sacrifice himself for you, how many pieces he’d give up just to keep your smile the way it is. he struggled to love you with the words he needs, but he hopes to whatever higher being or power is out there that his actions are enough.

because eren jaeger loves you enough to kill the entire world in your name.

in this life and all of its alternatives.

“papa! come! cake time!”

the deep depth of eren’s thoughts is breached by his little son calling out to him from the sliding glass doors on your back porch with a sheepish mikasa in tow. its then that the older brunette pulls his forehead away from yours, a smile settling on his handsome and matured features as he crouches down to welcome his little boy into his arms.

he’s so much bigger than eren had realised, maybe time is slipping away from you both. he’s almost two, has eren’s eyes and his untamed hair, but the face is all yours. that smile, the one eren’s son is giving him is so big and bright and beautiful and it’s all yours. another gift you had given eren, another person to love.

“hey there lil’ man! daddy’s comin’, okay?” eren grins as his toddler clambers into his lap to give him a slobbery kiss and a squeeze— making his head spin with adoration. even more so than hen he feels you come up behind him and rub his shoulder lovingly. “give momma ‘n i a second, yeah?”

“‘mkay!”

the toddler jumps up to hug your legs next, tugging you in the direction of his aunty mikasa with a pout that could rival eren’s. “sorry for interrupting,” she whispers fondly and apologetically. “he wanted to come get you guys, he’s been trying to ward sasha off from eating the cake.”

“well we can’t have that, can we baby?” you coo as if you’ve got the world beneath your fingers— brushing back your son’s hair before you lift him into your arms, holding him close as if you can’t believe he’s real and that eren gave him to you. your little product of love. “let’s follow aunty mika inside ‘n get papa’s candles going. then aunty sasha can have some cake, how’s that sound?”

“good momma! les’ go! les’ go!” he chants excitedly, laughing along with you as you follow mikasa back into the house— away from the cold outside.

and it’s in that moment, that eren finds himself warm— even without you by his side. because you leave him filled with so much joy, so much happiness that he couldn’t ever feel like he was unloved. not even for a second. you and your son, you’re both all that eren has in this world, you’re what ties him to this very existence, what gives him a reason to keep going.

before he can even register it, eren reaches out for you both from his place on the porch— calling out your name before you re-enter the house. “i love you,” he murmurs so softly that he fears his words might have been lost with the sway of the trees in the wind. “both of you. so much.”

but then you smile, that same smile that eren would tear the world apart for and say. “love you too. and, happy birthday, eren.”

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little-spoiled-brat · 1 year

Text

it had been a few months since the rumbling ended. the peace that everybody worked hard for was finally achieved, making the sacrifices of friends that you’ve considered family, comrades, loved ones, all have meaning in the end. battle scars being proof that you survived.

levi had moved to marley after the war, he hasn’t been to paradis since then but today was the day he was finally going back. gabi, falco, and onyankopon helped him get ready to journey back to paradis for the day — making sure that he looked nice and up to his standards as he was reuniting with someone in a few hours. you.

once back at his homeland, gabi and falco took him to where the survey corps headquarters used to be. he was then greeted by his former subordinates as mikasa, armin, jean, and connie took over, wheeling their former captain around the area as they caught up on a few things whilst he was in marley.

“y/n has been waiting for you” mikasa mentioned as she walked alongside levi whilst jean pushed his wheelchair. the raven haired man hummed in reply, a smile making its way on his scarred face.

“at the spot?” levi questioned as they all nodded and he asked them to bring him to the usual spot where you would always meet — underneath the sakura tree, where you first met.

“should we leave you alone for a few minutes, captain?” armin asked as they stopped just a few feet away from the tree. levi nodded, thanking them as they left him to have his moment in reuniting with you. he wheeled himself over to the sakura tree, sighing contentedly at the sight of you as he looked up at the pink blossoming tree that you always loved.

“it’s been a while huh, brat? i’m sorry i couldn’t visit you sooner, boat trips to paradis are a pain in the ass to schedule back in marley” levi chuckled, carefully lowering himself off of his wheelchair and onto the ground as he started telling you stories and catching up with you about what happened over the last few months.

his hand grazed your headstone, tracing his fingers over the engravement on the stone of your name. the name of the person he will love until the end.

here lies y/n ackerman. a friend, a comrade, and a loving wife.

#levi ackerman x reader #levi angst #levi x reader #aot angst #aot x y/n #aot x reader #aot #attack on titan #snk angst #snk #snk x reader #snk x y/n #shingeki no kyojin

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levitiquee · 8 months

Text

Farewell, Captain. (Levi Ackerman x injured!reader)

Cw: mentions of blood.

Summary: Levi Ackerman finds you in the verge of death.

It was going to rain

You bit down on your lip in worry. This was bad.

The expedition was supposed to be a small, short one. Just to catch a new titan or two for Hange's experiments. Go out, catch them, come back.

It was a small squad, about 15 people only. Section Commander Hange had picked out only a few to accompany. Being Levi's second, and one of the most treasured soldier in the military, usually they wouldn't call you for such simple tasks. The only reason you were asked to tag along was because you were also section commander Hange's assistant, you helped them in conducting the titan experiments. You didn't really mind as you had nothing better to do anyways. And by now, these small expeditions doesn't scare you as much as they used to.

You were ranked at the rear of the formation, along with two more. On one side, Sasha rode besides you, deeply focused. Captain Levi had, for some reason ordered her to come as well, to your joy (Though you suspected it was more of a punishment to stop her from stealing food, since banning her from meals only made the problem worse). You were glad hearing your best friend's coming too as the journey would be far less boring, although Sasha wasn't too enthusiastic. She kept groaning about how hungry she was and how she'd have to wait a couple more hours before she gets some food. (Irritated also because captain Levi had stripped her out of all hidden snacks before setting out.)

On the other side of you were a new recruit. She was in Section Commander Hange's squad, recruited because of her apparent brains in therotical knowledge. But Hange wanted her to have a bit of experience on the outside world too, so there she was. First ever expedition. Poor thing was shaking like a leaf.

Two nights ago, the special operations squad was sent out to clear the area out of any titans, baiting them towards where the trap was set along the South-East abandoned Tsuchou town. So the route was expected to be safe. And though precautions were taken, you and your teammates were much more relaxed, as you rode along, joking and laughing.

Except the new girl. She'd been rigid as stone since you've set out.

Suddenly, the girl closed the distance between you, pulling her horse so near, your legs almost touched. You looked at her, surprised. She'd been keeping noticable distance from you and Sasha until now.

"It's... it's going to rain, won't it?" She muttered quietly, glancing at you from the corner of her eyes.

You looked up and nodded, eyes shifting to the sky. "It appears so, yes."

"How long are we going to go on for?"

"Just a little further. We should be by the traps in about an hour."

The girl's shoulders visibly sunk, her face falling. "Another hour?"

"Hey," you called out softly, noticing the fear in her body language. She looked pitiful. "It's going to be fine. I know exactly what you must feel like but I promise you nothing's going to go wrong today. It's just a short trip, so hang on okay?"

Sasha shot an encouraging smile to her following your words.

She pursed her lips, giving a tight nod. Her hands gripped the reins tighter.

"I know..it's just..it feels so wrong." She whispered. "The sky was fine when we came out, then it turned dark within moments."

You understood. It really had been a good day. Or so it had seemed when the expedition began. Bright blue sky without a single cloud. Then half an hour in, it turned dark, thick black clouds appearing out of nowhere. And wind was blowing so heavy you could barely keep your eyes open, the dust that was getting kicked up by the horses kept flying into them.

It did feel wrong.

You thought about it for a second as you watched the girl gradually shifting further, regaining the distance. Her eyes unfocused, a worried expression settled.

"Sash, think I'm gonna go ahead." You told Sasha.

Sasha immediately started shaking her head but she barely had time to got any words out before you squeezed the horse's sides, telling her to speed up. She did, hooves clashing against the ground, leaving small clouds of dust. You passed through your comrades, ignoring their side eyes.

Breaking ranks was absolutely unpermitted unless in life threatening situations. But when you're favoured by the higher ups and second to none but Levi Ackerman, you get a lot of free passes and unspoken privileges—which, needless to point out, you abused whenever you could.

You speedened up until the familiar figure caught your eye. Nudging your horse, you manurvered it towards him, catching up to him in moments

Levi glanced at you sideways with narrowed eyes, annoyance flashing through his features at your appearance.

"Tch." He clicked his tongue. "Why the hell did you leave your post? Just because it's not an actual expedition doesn't mean-"

"Yeah, yeah" You cut him off, not in the mood for a lecture. Levi's eye twitched, but he didn't say anything. He never did.

If it was anyone else but you, Levi would have taught you a lesson right there. And if it was anyone but Levi, you would for sure at the very least be demoted for speaking in such tone. But though none of you would admit it, the relationship between you and Levi were much casual than it should be between a commanding officer and a soldier.

"It's going to rain, captain." You pointed towards the sky. "I don't like this. Can't we camp out or something? We've cleared out the area two nights ago anyways, there shouldn't be titans around. It'll be safe and we can continue later."

Levi sighed. "Tell that to four-eyes. I tried. They won't listen to me. Keeps saying, 'its not much further'."

You grimaced. When it came to titans, section commander Hange lost all rationality. "It won't be a light rain either. Looks like a fucking storm is coming."

Levi nodded in agreement. "I'll see what I can do." He huffed "You don't have to worry about it. "

"I'll be hella pissed if I get drenched, I swear."

"No one asked. And go back to your damn post, you little pest." He finished sharply, giving you a warning glance.

You obligated, even you knew when to step back. Pulling down on the reins, you slowed your horse down, turning it around to go back to your original spot. Sasha and the new recruit were staring wide eyed.

"You really need to stop doing that. One of these days, captain Levi will just go batshit on you." Sasha shook her head, a grin on her face.

"We'll see." You snorted.

"Seriously, I don't even know why he lets you screw around like this, if it was any of us-"

"Did you ask him about the rain?" The rookies high pitched voice cut Sasha off. She was staring at you, face contorted in anticipation.

"Yeah, kid." You responded gloomily. "Don't think they'll stop unless it actually starts raining."

She didn't say anything, just looked away, distancing herself with her horse again, knuckles taut on the reins.

"She's just scared." Sasha muttered, glancing at her.

"Weren't we all?"

"Don't remind me." She shuddered at the reminder of our first expedition—the one where more than half of us were massacred by the female titan.

You watched the sky with squinted eyes, as the clouds had covered the last rays of the sun, creating an eerie dark ambience, even making you shift warily in your position.

The kid was right, it felt wrong.

Somewhere far away, thunder rolled. Once. Twice. The rumbling sound was almost deafening.

That's when the first drop of rain hit your face. It rolled down your cheek and fell on the ground.

And then the sky crashed down upon the earth.

A curse escaped your lips, completely unprepared for the sudden phenomenon. Surprised yelps from others joined yours. Hastily, you wrapped your cloak around yourself tightly to regain some warmth that you lost.

Oh dear. This was definitely bad .

Within seconds, the world was white. You couldn't see anything. Only faint outlines and blurred green. Somewhere far front, you heard Hange groan and Moblit screaming out to move out to far right to the forest to take shelter underneath the trees.

Despite being half blind, you followed the orders, pulling the reins. You felt the thuds of Sasha's and the new recruits horses match yours.

Then Sasha gasped.

She hissed out your name, her voice terrified.

"Titans." She whispered.

Your heart fell. No.

"What?" You yelled out, praying to God you heard wrong.

"I can hear titans!" Sasha said louder this time, the panic in her tone clear. "From everywhere!"

Damn Sasha and her extraordinary hearing abilities.

"Shit. Shit shit shit!" You cursed out. Why? How? The area was supposed to be clear. Why were they swarming on you then?!

"We have to let the others know!"

"How!? The rain is too thick and loud for the signal guns to be seen or heard! Hell, we probably won't even hear titans come up until they're breathing down our damn necks!" You were losing your cool, the panic settling in.

Scouts did not go out in expeditions when it rained. It was a rule. Never.

But here the fuck you were.

You heard the rookie whimper right beside your ear. Your head turned to see her almost over your shoulders, eyes wide with terror as she heard the conversation, eyes switching from Sasha to you.

"It'll be fine." You said to her, trying to calm down for her sake. But you knew as well, the chances of it being fine was next to fucking zero because Sasha's ears were too fucking accurate. "It'll be fine, just stick close to me-"

The terrified yelps of several people up front cut you off and your blood froze.

A huge, enormous figure standing before you, staring down with wide, hungry eyes. A creepy smile on its face.

You stilled, right there. Your breathing stopped.

No no no.

Not here.

Your horse reacted before you processed it, throwing itself to the side just as the titans feet slammed against the ground just where you've been, sending tremors down the earth. It's grubby hand swooshed over your head.

The mount flailed wildly as you tried to keep balance. You were about to whip the reins and get the hell out of there when another cry pierced through your bones.

From much, much close.

The rookie.

You whipped your head to see the girl running the exact fucking opposite way, the titan following right behind with big, heavy thuds.

You didn't even care where Sasha might be.

She was experienced, she'd be fine.

The kid won't be fine.

In a split second decision, you turned your mount around, grabbing it's neck as it charged in full speed following the titan, speedily crossing it.

You were going in the forest.

Not the wisest decision you've made because you still couldn't see anything except for the outline of the titan behind you, you could crash into a tree any second.

But fuck.

"Hey, you moron! Come back here!" You yelled out to her in frustration and desperation. She didn't even turn around, only speedened up. "That's the wrong fucking way! Turn around!"

You moved, fast as the wind, raindrops stabbing your face like tiny little frost needles, making you wince.

You entered the forest, deeper, deeper.

This was bad.

And then it got worse.

It was the red that caught your eyes. The type of red you could recognize anywhere.

Blood was splattered all across the ground, the rainwater washing it away.

Oh no no no.

The crunch of human bones jolted you awake as you looked up to see the titan that had been the cause of it. You stared. Stared. Stared as it stared back at you.

You looked down, right there on the foot of it, rolling around was the detached head of the girl.

You gazed back up.

And then you saw two more. Slowly, steadily coming out of the forest, disturbingly enlarged organs swinging with every steps.

3 titans in front. 1 in the back.

What have you done.

You had barely turned your gear switch on when the first titan struck, stomping down your horse. Just in time, with the gap of a second from being smashed, you pressed on the triggers, the wires shooting forward, planting to whatever surface they had found and pulling you with it.

It was reckless. Stupid. Using ODM gear when you couldn't see shit. But you were in a forest so hopefully it'll randomly latch onto trees. Or it could fucking slip because of the rain and you could die. But you took your chance, not that you had a choice.

One of the advantages titans had was that they could see clearly in the rain. Their enormous pupils followed your movements, hands reaching out to grab you. You twisted just in time, releasing the wires and shooting them again, using them to swing yourself further and faster.

And you did that. Every time the wires shot out, your heart caught in your throat thinking it'd miss and find nothing to latch onto but fate must've had your back because it didn't.

Until it did.

Perhaps it was the stupid rush of confidence you gained from moving so perfectly, that you had speedened up. That was the downfall. Though one had latched, the other anchor slipped, missing the branch and instead going over it. The moment you realized it, you knew it was over.

The momentum from before and the pull of the wires, you slammed against the trees, hitting your head so hard, you felt your skull crack, the pain ripping through your brain. The anchor that had latched onto the tree didn't bury itself properly and you clashed right against it. The metal hook went straight through your shoulders. And nothing could ever have prepared you for the agony that panged through.

You dropped, back clashing against the ground. You lied there, sprawled and bleeding out, the rain pooling in your eyes, blurrying your already hazy vision from hitting your head so hard. But you watched the titans surround you, an almost giddy look crossing their stupid expressions.

Those little fuckers.

And so you watched, helplessly, as one of them reached out, pulling you up by your legs, your head dangling upside down.

And all you saw was big wide eyes and gaped jaws.

One of the other reached out, wrapping it's fat fingers around your midsections, pulling you towards itself. The one holding you groaned, pulling you back, as if it didn't really want to share. Your abdominal muscles and organs strech to the point you thought you'd split in half.

What a shit way to die, you thought.

You survived Shiganshina, you survived Trost, you survived that damn 57th expedition.

And you were going to die here.

Alone.

While four fucking ugly as hell titans fought about who got to eat you.

'Second to none but Levi Ackerman', your ass.

But your friends, you thought. Eren had yet so much to go, that you won't be there to see. Before you left, when you've said goodbye to Connie and Jean, you smacked both of them in the head, that wasn't a good farewell, was it? Sasha would go hungry during meals because you won't be there to share half your food.

You wondered if captain would be the slightest bit of sad.

Had he noticed you missing by now? Would he miss the little banters and bickerings you had every day with him? Would he be disappointed that you were going out in such a lame way?

You closed your eyes, dangling upside down was not helping your case. Your head was starting to get empty as you felt the blood pool down in your head.

That's good. At least you won't be conscious while you die.

It won't hurt.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four. Five. Six. Seven....one,five, four? Ticktocktickticktocktick-

Then you fell.

It wasn't a gentle drop You hit the ground again, full force. And this time you felt your leg bend awkwardly, a bone snapped.

But it didn't hurt, not really. You were too numb by now.

You felt the ground shook as something heavy impacted. Four times. Followed by loud, gutteral animalistic growls of a titan.

Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud.

One. Two. Three. Four.

But it was the sharp metallic sound of a sword clanging was what woke you up.

Your eyes opened and you saw steam.

Ah. Were the titans dead?

But who killed them?

Your head turned sheepishly and you found the answer.

There was Levi, staring at you with wide, wide eyes, mouth slightly parted. His swords were discarded by his side and he just stood there. Was his hands shaking?

Oh, that's funny. That's the first ever time you've seen captain react that much. He looked funny with such big eyes. Was it because of how filthy you were? You couldn't see yourself, but you knew. You must've been caked in blood and mud. Is that why captain was so shocked?

Your mind was so fuzzy, you wanted to go to sleep. Would the captain mind if you fell asleep here? In this filth?

Levi finally registered the sight. He shifted, still in a daze, and then he dropped, straddling you. Careful enough to not let any of his body weight touch you.

He looked so scared.

"Shit." He muttered. "Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Oi brat—" His hands closed around your arms, shaking you. Your brain felt as if it rattled in your head. "Fuck–can you hear me?"

His hand pressed against your face and he flinched at how cold you were. You only stared at him through half-lidded eyes.

Then, weakly, with all you had, you parted your lips, the words barely audible.

"...welcome to the party, captain. Bit late though I'm afraid." You mumbled. "You do realize shaking me doesn't actually help, don't you? Unless you want me to throw up or something."

Levi felt his heart hitch.

"You little shit–" he took a sharp breath. Then slowly, carefully, he slightly shifted you holding your hair back to inspect how bad the damage was, and it wasn't a pretty sight.

"I'm a goner, aren't I?" you muttered quietly, wincing when one of his fingers accidentally grazed against the injury. Levi immediately pulled his hand back, his hand stained red.

"Shut up." He hissed, trying to keep his growing anxiety from showing. "You're bleeding like shit. Thats way too much blood."

"I'm aware, can't help it." you groaned when your leg moved a bit too much, "Got it on your clothes too."

"I could care fuck less about it right now, you dumbfuck." Levi snapped out. The he shifted off of you, kneeling beside. He unhooked the green cloak around him with fast fingers. The green surface was smeared with dark red in places.

Carefully, he pulled you up by the shoulders, cradling you against his chest. You almost cried at the sudden feeling of warmth, and the sharp wave of pain that shot through your bent leg. Tears stinged your eyes. "Bite me. I knew you cared." You joked, an attempt to lighten the dire situation and to ignore the way your whole body ached and how you already felt the lack of oxygen in the air. Levi let out an irritated breath as he used the cloak to wrap around your head to stop the bleeding. His breathing loud and heavy beside your ear. "Can you shut up, you ungrateful brat? I'm trying to save your damn life."

Levi worked so gently, it was unfamiliar. You wondered as your head rested on his shoulder and his hands worked around you, every movement slow and careful, trying his best not to hurt you more.

Ah, so even the harsh captain can be this gentle. And despite emptiness clouding your head, you felt slightly glad. At least you got to see this side of him. This is a nice way to die.

As if he had somehow heard your thoughts, his jaw tightened. "Don't even think about dying. That's a fucking order."

If only the world worked like that.

Levi knew he wasn't doing a good job. His hands shook too much, and it was causing you unnecessary pain. He froze everytime you winced, taking a few seconds until you stilled, then continuing. He was also aware of how dirty the fabric was, with dirt and mud, but this'd have to. It's either this or watching you bleed out to death.

"Okay," he whispered quietly under his breath, more to reassure himself than you. He turned you so he could see your face. An absolutely panic stricken look passes him when he sees the tears. "Fuck, Did I hurt you too much? Does it still hurt?"

You sniffled, mouth twitching to a grin. You tried to ignore the pounding in your head. "It's not your fault. You didn't do anything."

Levi nodded, his eyes shifting to your shoulder. "How the fuck did this even happen?" He hissed sharply, seeing the metal anchor buried deep in the flesh. "Even when you get injured, it's in the stupidest ways possible." He thought about it for a second, biting the insides of his cheek. Unsure what to do. Then he sighed. "Shit. It's best to let it stay there. If I try to pull it out, might accidentally tear something. And the bleeding would be too much to handle."

"Nice." You groaned, then all of a sudden, broke into a fit of coughs, blood spilling out with each jolt. Levi's eyes widened at the sight, pupils blown out.

"The titans." You coughed, trying to explain. "Must've fucked up my insides. The grip was too tight."

Levi frustratedly ran a hand through his hair, uncaring of the grime and filth. His face screwed up and eyebrows knitted together, the fear in his eyes wide and clear. Internal bleeding was much, much concerning.

"Captain," the word was a groan. Your eyes were so heavy, begging to go to rest. Would that be so bad? "...I don't think I can make this one out. I'm dying, aren't I?"

"No you're not. But if you don't stop talking, I might actually make you a goner." Levi deadpanned while going over your leg. You snorted, the slight action paining you. But it was nice. With him fussing over.

"Come on, we gotta get you back-hey–" he slapped your cheek, seeing your eyes flutter. Gentle but sharp. "Don't pass out, kid. Better keep those damn eyes open. Stay awake. Stay the fuck awake, you hear me?"

His fingers fiddled with your uniform straps, removing the gas tanks and the overall gears. He had to cut down the wire that stuck with hook that was latched to your shoulder since he couldn't take it out. The removal of the extra weight made you feel slightly better.

"Alright," Cautiously, he hooked one arm over your shoulder, the other under your knees. "Brace yourself, this is going to hurt as fuck." Then, though carefully, with one sweep pull, he picked you up. And despite his warning, and the mental preparation, he was right. It hurt like shit. A soft cry escaped your lips. "I'm sorry, just–just hang on." He mumbled, cradling you close to him, adjusting your head so that it rested against his shoulder. He knew it wasn't the most ideal position as it'd be hard for him to move with ODM while holding you like this, not to mention your leg would not probably be in the best state either. But he couldn't think of a better position, your head needed support, he couldn't let any weight on your abdominal muscles either.

Then without moving his arms from beneath you, he reached for the ODM triggers with his hands and pressed his fingers down.

The takeoff was the final push. The jolt as he kicked off the ground and the pain that followed right after was the limit. You knew you were going to die.

"You pretend like you don't give two shits, but you're going to miss me once I'm gone aren't you?" The words escaped you without thinking. You weren't really thinking at all, it's just this urge that took over. But if you're going to die, you wanted to keep talking. You wanted to hear his voice. You wanted him to scowl and snap at you to shut up. So until you can't, you wanted to keep talking. One last bicker. Never in your life had you thought he'd be the one to hear your last words or that his ones would be the last you'd hear. And you didn't mind. At all.

"Fuck off." He responded coldly.

"I'm serious."

"You're serious? Now that's a shocker."

There he went, from one tree to another. You grinned, looking up at his contorted face. He was trying so hard not to panic, his eyes flicking from you to the route.

"Captain."

"Can't you just keep your mouth shut for once in your fucking life?"

"Said life's on the verge of death, so I'd rather not."

"Stop saying shit like that. You're not dying on me."

You sighed. He was wrong. You were indeed dying on him. Despite the warmth of his body pressed against you, you could feel your own temperature lowering dangerously. The cloak he had used as a makeshift bandage to stop the bleeding weren't helping much better either as you felt blood trickle over your eyes. You felt weak, dizzy, disassociated. You could barely remember where you are and where you're going.

"Captain. Thank you for choosing me."

"What?" Levi's eyes shifted towards you, surprised and confused. It was such a strange sight. The bangs he so carefully kept were now all messy and disheveled, some strands sticking to his face with sweat. You returned his silvery gaze.

"Thank you for choosing me. Letting me be a part of your squad. Saving my ass everytime I fucked up. For everything, really. You weren't the nicest, but you have a good heart. And I'm not the best at expressing gratitude but I had to let you know."

"Shut up." Levi hissed through gritted teeth, his voice cracked ever so slightly. The rain had lessened into a drizzle.

"Once I'm gone, there won't be anyone to nag you to go to sleep. Remember to take breaks, won't you?"

Levi wouldn't look at you. He couldn't look at you. But his hold tightened. "Shut the fuck up. Keep talking and I'll drop you." Oh, but you had to keep talking. Your breaths were numbered you could tell. And you wanted to spend them on talking.

"And hydrate. Don't drink too much tea. Stop being mean to Hange and Eren. Let Sasha eat, don't ban her from meals when she fucks up.." the words slurred, your voice becoming quieter with every words and each were punctuated with heavy and heavier gasps. Your eyes closed. The light was too bright for you. And blood was pooling inside your mouth, choking you. "..they care for you. I hope you know that. So be nice every once a while. It won't kill you I swear."

Levi sucked in a breath. "Oi, brat." His voice was so far, so far away. You wanted to reach out and hold on to it, somehow wrap yourself around it. So unlike the usual stoic and dry comments he'd send through your way.. "...I take it back. Don't shut up. Keep talking. Keep blabbering whatever the fuck- Don't die on me, not like this–shit–not like this—" Guess he did care after all. "—stay with me, come on, stay with me.–"

You were fading. Drowning. Floating. But you heard him. His words a broken record, repeating over and over in your brain—staywithmestaywithmestaywithme…

You apologized silently. You would if you could. But the air was choking you and you couldn't stay any longer. You'd stay with his mean ass for life if you had the choice, didn't he know? Didn't he know you dedicated your heart for him?

Oh. Time's out.

Goodbye.

Captain.

(might write a part 2 lol)

#attack on Titan x reader #aot x reader #snk x reader #shingeki no kyoujin x reader #levi angst #aot angst #levi Ackerman x reader #levi x reader #snk angst #levi ackerman angst

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chrollohearttags · 5 months

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miss cherry, i hope that this november is treating you well!!! the new layout is everything ❤️ i can’t stop thinking about how musician!eren would react to getting the phone call about y/n’s fall injury 🫣 no doubt in my mind that he drops everything to rush to the hospital and be by her side!!

heeey honeybun! This month has been great to me (injury aside) but I can’t complain. Hope it’s been good for you as well! 🫶🏾 I appreciate you so much. And wheeew, I swear y’all are gonna make me put my babies through it! 😫 but since were still on the angsty pain train, let’s get into it. (This is so sad, I’m sorry!)

THE LAST TIME I SAW YOU

it felt unreal…time seemed to have frozen at that very moment and the only sound that could be heard was the egregiously loud heart beat nearly thudding from his chest. Those words..they couldn’t have been true. It was a lie..a complete and utter lie..and even so…

“Wait! EJ! Where are you going?!—“

“Mr. Jaeger! This storm is terrible. There’s no way you can drive in it!”

all useless chatter as far as he were concerned. There wasn’t a storm or anything otherwise that would stop him from getting to that hospital right now. He had to go see..see for himself the condition that his baby (y/n) was in. Even if you claim you hated his guts at the moment, even if you were angry with him..it didn’t matter. None of that mattered. As long as you were okay. You had to be..you had to be okay or he was going to truly lose it.

“If both of you know what’s good for you, you’ll get the fuck out of my way. Now move!”

brushing past his assistant and manager as if they were nothing more than weightless figments. Breezing past them with nothing more than his phone in hand and the sheer panic coursing through his veins. Truthfully, Floch was right. There was no way he was in any condition to be driving right now. Not just because of the typical torrential Florida downpour being increased by that of a tropical storm but the fact he hadn’t slept in two days. Running on fumes and adrenaline. But perhaps his biggest motivating factor was love…love that transcended everything. Including any problems the two of you may have been experiencing. Regardless, he’d hop into the front seat of that McLaren, pressing the button to start the engine and peel from his driveway like a bat from the gates of hell.

how could he not when he had just received a phone call that nearly made his heart stop?..

“Mr. Jaeger. This is nurse Collins from Jackson Hospital. We have a miss (y/n) (l/n) here..you were listed as her first point of contact. Among the people here asking for you..she’s been brought in to our facility in critical condition—“

that was all he could handle before he imploded and enough to send him blindly flying into the night to make it to you. He didn’t know the extent of your injuries or what even happened but immediately, his phone was exploding with texts and calls from your girls. Who had also stopped the performance to be by your side. Your best friend Niesha, who was by all accounts the silliest of the group was too hysterical to even speak. She sounded devastated but he assured her she was on the way. “It’s okay, Niesha. I’m on the way. Please, just tell me what happened.” But luckily, his best friend and her boyfriend, Armin was already there to comfort her and decided it best not to break the news over the phone. “Dude, just get here alright. Please…and drive safe. Don’t you need in a bed next to her.” Which made perfect sense. If they divulged the severity of your injuries over the phone, he would undoubtedly lose control and in this weather? That wasn’t wise.

however, they were all waiting…holding their breaths to hear what was going on. He hadn’t seen you in a couple days but when you spoke to him over the phone, he recalled what you said to him the last time he saw you:

“You know I still love you, right?…tell me you know that. We’ll get through this. I just need some time, okay?”

“Of course…I love you too. Please..just come home, (y/n). I’m so sorry but I promise that nothing happened—“

“I can’t..I can’t face you like this. I can’t face you when I don’t know how I’ll react. I’m hurt, Eren. I’m so mad at you..when I asked you about it, you pretended I was stupid. You didn’t even bother to clear it up. Just told me I should know better. That’s not fair…it’s not fair that you pretend not to give a fuck about everybody else’s feelings. How can I marry you like that?”

among laughing at you when your comments were filled with hate, saying it should’ve been them together and not some “stripper.” Telling you to ignore it as he always did. And other awful things..only after talks of possible infidelity and heartbreak had taken over your relationship. You were devastated to even think that he’d cheat on you and with his manager nonetheless but that was for another time. Right now, that all was irrelevant. What mattered was that you were okay. What would have normally been a fifteen minute drive was cut in half as he breezed down the freeway. Doing eighty five in a sixty mile per hour zone.

he’d careen that two seater right up front to the entrance way and come running through those doors like he was some sort of track star. His all black clothing and half tied hair soaked by the rain but he didn’t care.

“EJ!” Four voices cried out in unison as they bum rushed him. It was your girls and fellow members of the Pole Assassins. They all seemed to have been crying their eyes out and when they saw your man there, they all rushed to him as some pillar of comfort. He’d hug each of them before begging to know what happened. armin, who joined them right after would dap his best friend up before hugging him as well. Assuring him that it would be okay. He seemed desperate and depleted but nothing could truly prepare him for what he was about to hear…just then a doctor would come out and greet everyone, updating him on her condition.

“And you are?”

“Her fiancé. What happened?”

and that’s when he’d reveal the extent of your injuries. Four broken ribs, a fractured forearm, a head contusion and internal bleeding as you made a direct hit to the floor from fifteen feet in the air. The silver lining was that they were able to immediately rush you into surgery and stop the bleeding so you were no longer in life threatening condition but you were not out of the woods by a long shot and they had to keep you under close care if they didn’t want that to happen. And the physical shape? Well, needless to say, he’d need a minute before he saw you..

“Well can I see her?! Where is she?!—“

already crying before the doctor could get the words out. But he assured him that once you were moved from recovery, he’d allow him in. All he could do was wait..he felt fucking useless! And all he could do was collapse into a nearby chair with his head in his hands. Normally, they’d take that as a sign that he was about to explode but right now..he was just heartbroken. Grief stricken and sobbing..it was extremely hard to see because it proved just how much he truly cared for you.

“..how did this happen?..”

softly questioning and causing everyone else’s eyes to well up in the process. That’s when they’d explain the situation. Armin had been hosting for an event, DJ’ing and the girls were performing with him; hence the leather dance attire they were all still dressed in with only their signature letter-mans to cover them and tall heels. They noticed you seemed off but figured that it was just due to this whole ordeal with him. They didn’t blame him at all though. They knew you could be stubborn too so they figured it was mutual and it all would blow over. But you also seemed detached..as if you weren’t even there. They begged you to sit the show out if your heart wasn’t fully into it because half hearted energy created mistakes like this one. You were performing great all night but there was this emptiness behind your eyes. And when you went to go attempt your signature solo move, the Kiss of Death; a harrowing combination of three of the most complex pole tricks in the game. And dubbed so advanced that no other dancer in the world could recreate it. You were spinning and climbing the pole at rapid speed..trying to reach the center point of the pole before the beat dropped so you could come dropping down into a split. A trick you had executed so many times, you could do it in your sleep. But it wasn’t a misstep that sent you flying to the floor. The truth was..you had already fell unconscious before you hit the floor. Niesha glanced over to see you and your eyes were narrowed and your features was blank. Brianne, who was in your opposite side said the same. And when the beat drop came, rather than some elaborate split or twerk, you landed face down onto the hard floor. Causing gasps and screams to arise from the audience. You fell directly on your arm which spared you from a brain bleed or skull fracture but your arm was toast for the time being. They immediately called EMS and canceled the remainder of the show..it was awful. Who knew how long it would take you to recover or if you’d ever dance again at all..

“I knew I shouldn’t have let her go out there. She had been out of it all day and I didn’t say nothing—“

Niesha, who was the most devastated just continuously sobbed. Comforted by her boyfriend, who was holding her close. “It’s okay, baby. It’s not your fault..none of us could’ve known this would happened. Just try to calm down.” But seeing the girl she called a sister like this? She was inconsolable. And there was still the possibility that your condition could return life threatening at any point. But all they could do was pray. They didn’t know if you had taken something prior that put you in this state or what. As for Eren, he had heard enough and just got up to see if they’d allow him in without saying a word to anyone else. They didn’t bother to stop him because he too didn’t place fault on them. The burden was solely on himself..he shouldered every bit of that guilt and he felt he was the only one to blame. Had he been a little more attentive of your feelings, you never would’ve fought and you never would’ve been so out of it, that you’d make a mistake. Luckily, the nurse had just gotten word that you were out of recovery and in the ICU. They’d never seen someone so resilient. Although they were hesitant, the nurse let him and took him to where you were. And when he reached the glass partitioned room; yellow curtains drawn to shield you, the nurse would ask one more time:

“Are you sure you’re okay to see her?” And he nodded. Unable to be sure himself but he had to. He had to see his princess. He owed you that much..

and once he entered…his heart nearly stopped. There you were, dressed in bandages from head to toe. Breathing tube in your nose, cast on your arm and wraps on your legs..you were conscious but just by an inch. One could only guess that he was the reason. You needed him there but even so..you were in horrible shape.

“Princess..” the words barely making it out before he kneeled by your side. You could see him but only faint glimmers. You were still groggy from the medication and being in pain but it had been an hour or so since your emergency procedure. Truth was, it took them nearly an hour to get there after you were already taken because of the horrible traffic and trying to clear the venue. They didn’t even have an ID on you when you came in. Hell, Armin and the girls didn’t even know what hospital you were at. By the time they arrived, you had just gotten out of surgery. So it was natural that they informed him right after. But being his normal self, his phone was tucked away during his work session and he didn’t pay attention. You could’ve been much worse and he didn’t even bother to check..he was a horrible fiancé!

“I-I’m so sorry…I’m so sorry this happened to you. It’s all my fault.”

it was all he could utter. He was on his knees, cradling your hand and crying as he apologized over and over. Sorry for the fact that he didn’t answer sooner, that he didn’t come to your rescue, that he had made you feel less than your worth and not do anything to put your mind at ease. More than likely, you had become so worked up about this situation that your heart rate got too high and you fainted. And he’d be correct. You were constantly thinking of him and when you heard his voice on the song that was playing, the same one that you had practiced to several times and had even gone viral for when you danced during his shows, the memories of everything came rushing back, causing you to have a panic attack and with the rush of it all, you got too worked up. Either way, this was his mess to fix. But he felt powerless…all he could do was just sob and beg your forgiveness.

“Please…I don’t care if you hate me. If you never want to see me again but please be okay. I should’ve never let you leave. I should’ve been there for you, (y/n) and I wasn’t. I’m so sorry, you deserve better than this. I love you—“

amid his rambling; head bowed before you, he’d suddenly feel a hand to his tear stained cheek.

“Eren…stop that.” The words barely even reaching a decibel as you murmured them. He’d immediately grab it and gently hold it. He’d look up to see you just slightly looking at him. He was so relieved you were still here!

“Baby!…” trying to wipe his eyes but couldn’t control it at this point. He was a mess and didn’t care who saw. But he wasn’t the only one falling apart. Just then he’d hear sniffling and your already faint voice cracking.

“Stop crying… ‘s not your fault.”

but he couldn’t be sure. He felt entirely and fully responsible.

“I’m just so..I’m so glad you’re here.…I thought you hated me.”

The words sending sharp pangs through his heart as you whimpered. Because he could never, even if he wanted to. The fact that he had made you feel this way made him question if he even deserved to be in your life. He was so ashamed. How could he ever allow you to feel like that?! Maybe you were right, maybe he couldn’t marry you like this…

“..I couldn’t even if I wanted to…” just then, his eyes would swell all over again, his soul filled with sadness and anxiety because what he was about to do next, would undoubtedly shatter both of your hearts into pieces. “That’s a relief…I’m sorry I..worried you—“ No matter what you said or how many times you repeated it, this was his mess to fix. He made you feel as if you meant nothing. It was true, nothing happened between he and Mikasa. It was a line that neither of them could ever cross..he didn’t feel that way for her and it was true, you were the only woman he loved. You were his everything!…but even so, he didn’t deserve you. He didn’t deserve to have someone like you in his life if he couldn’t appreciate it. All of these people talking, disrespecting his lady and what had he done to make it right? What had he actually done to quell your insecurities? He was selfish to a fault..because of that, you were hurting and not just physically, thanks to his ignorance. Grasping your hand once more as you faded back into unconsciousness, he’d kiss the top of your hand. That’s when he’d reach for his own and slide off the silver band from his left ring finger, placing it onto the bed next to you.

“I’m so sorry, (y/n)….I love you. I love you so much..”

with that, he got up to walk out..fighting back the urge to break down. Feeling as if there was a hole in him..as if a piece of him just died right then and there.

“But this is goodbye. I hope you find a man that can treat you right. Someone who deserves to call you their wife. You won’t ever have to be hurt by me again. I promise..”

Because he knew it would be the last time he saw you.

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