#park jimin fanfiction

[chimcess]

Waterlog || pjm (1)

Pairing: Jimin x Reader Other tags: Olympic Swimmer!Jimin, Ex Olympic Swimmer! Reader, Swim Coach!Reader Genre: Strangers to Friends to Lovers!AU, Coach!AU, Swimming!AU, Age Gap!AU, HEAVY Angst, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, fluff, eventual smut, I'm so soft for these two it's crazy. Word Count: 17.4k+ Synopsis: After a car accident ends her athletic career, Y/N has slowly started rebuilding her life again as a high school swim coach. That’s until she gets a request from an old friend and finds herself back in the spotlight as the new coach of Olympic swimmer, Park Jimin. Warnings: discussions of significant death (does not happen in story), talks of a bad car accident, talks of drunk driving (please drinking responsibly), more than likely wrong swimming terms and poor understanding of how the Olympics actually works (I did so much research, pls be nice to me lol), strong language, lots of mental health discussions, reader has mommy and daddy issues, Older reader, Jimin is a complete sweetie, the tamest chapter of them all A/N: Well, well, well, look who came back. I first wrote Waterlog back in 2021, and while I enjoy the premise, I hate the finished product. I wanted to go back and edit/fix what I originally had, but when I tried it became so different, I was better off rewriting the entire thing. I hope you guys like this mini-series. If you would like to read the original go to my blog archive. Thank you for reading!

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Staring at the pool, I managed to calm myself with relative ease. Jin had been right, physical therapy had made things easier. The water glistened prettily in the lights, and I waited with bated breath for my trainer to come in. 

Emery was a sweet guy, pretty with a lip ring and tattoos, but with a surprising amount of shyness it was laughable. His softness was offset by his powerful muscles, and I enjoyed his never-ending sense of humor. Unlike Dr.Maddox, Emery treated me like I was a normal person. Not an Olympian who almost lost her leg in an accident, or the woman whose fiancé died. I was just Y/N, and it was a relief to be around him.

Running my fingers along the scars on my leg, I mindlessly drew patterns around them in the silence. It was not normal for Emery to take this long, but his assistant had said he was running behind due to another patient, so I was unbothered. I had planned my entire day around this, so I was in no rush.

Finally, the door swung open revealing a disheveled Emery. Breathing heavier than usual, he rolled his eyes at me in frustration before saying his pleasantries. Whoever it had been had gotten him worked up.

“Rough morning?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

With an annoyed sigh, he nodded.

“I shouldn’t say this, but I hope that woman never comes back here.”

I laughed, “We all have that someone. Don’t feel too bad.”

Shaking his head, I could tell it took restraint on his part not to rant and rave about the woman who had left. Emery and I were more friendly than most. I had been seeing him for over two years now, but we still kept a semblance of a professional relationship. Especially Emery.

“How’s the kids?” He asked, making small talk as we started getting ready for a swim.

I was the coach of a high school swim team in town, something I talked about quite a bit, and Emery always liked hearing about. He was a great water polo player but chose to go into physical therapy while he was in college. After seeing one of his friends get injured and how much physical therapy had helped him, Emery decided to change his major. Four years later, he says he could never see himself doing anything else.

“They’re doing well,” I said honestly. “We got a couple of freshmen on the team, but they’re doing a lot better than I thought they would.”

Emery hummed, offering me assistance getting into the pool. While walking had been mostly figured out, the obvious limp aside, I still had some trouble with getting in-and-out of things. Even my bathtub had to be switched out since I was unable to step over it. I still used the medical chair while in there, too.

The water was cool against my skin, and I felt instantly relieved. The dull aches and pains left as soon as I got into the water. Swimming to my usual spot, I waited patiently for Emery to join me.

“That’s great to hear,” He smiled.

Going to the edge of the pool, Emery grabbed a set of barbells and handed them to me. Taking them, the two of us went over the workout plan for the day. Pulling himself up on the pool’s edge, Emery picked up his stopwatch and told me to begin.

Getting on the interstate, I sang along to the radio as I made my way to Hoseok’s. The two of us had been friends since high school, our mutual love for swimming making it impossible to keep apart, and only growing with time. He was one of my biggest support systems after the accident. Both of us had retired years ago now, but I remembered our days as Olympians fondly. Those were the best years of my life.

A small group of our friends were getting together at his house to watch the summer Olympics this afternoon. The women’s swimming finals were happening today, and I knew two of the girls competing. Turning on my blinker, I quickly got off the interstate.

Pressing around my car’s radio screen, I went to my contacts and pressed Andy’s number. She was off today and in charge of getting everything together. Hoseok had tried to do it himself, but always seemed to forget who should do what and ended up buying everything himself. She picked up after the fourth ring.

“What’s up, sugar?” Andy greeted, her voice soft and light. Her Memphis accent was thick and brought a smile to my face. Everyone had made jokes about her being southern when we first met. “Don’t tell me you’re missing Nationals.”

I shook my head even though she could not see me.

“I’m on my way,” I replied. “What should I pick up? I completely forgot.”

Andy sighed, “You’re just as bad as Jin.”

Seokjin was Andy’s husband. The two of them had been together whenever they moved to Colorado, married before I ever met them, and became quick friends with Hoseok when they moved to the Springs. That was how I had met them. Whenever their daughter Dani was born, Andy had asked me to be her Godmother and I sobbed in her lap. They were my closest friends next to Hoseok. Jin was indeed very forgetful, though, and the jibe made me chuckle.

“Cut me some slack,” I argued. “I’ve been working out for two hours straight.”

I could hear the smile in her voice, “Just get some pizza or something. We’re picking up some wings and Hobi’s in charge of the drinks. Minho and Tilly are bringing… something. I don’t even know anymore.”

Fully laughing now, I saw a Little Ceasars up ahead and got into the correct lane. Minho and Matilda were loose cannons when it came to our parties. While sweet, and fiercely loyal, I found myself wondering why I hung out with them at times. We were night and day personality wise, but I loved them dearly. Minho would probably bring some Korean side dishes from home, and Matilda would pick up a few packs of ramen from the store. Andy was stressing over nothing again. I hoped she was getting proper rest on her days off.

“I’m at Little Caesars,” I told her, parking my car. “I’m going to get the basics. How many things of Crazy Bread should I get?”

She thought for a second before replying.

“Five?” She was definitely unsure about her answer.

It was hard to gauge just how hungry everyone would be, and Jin was a bottomless pit.

“Sounds good,” I said instead, already thinking about getting more.

“Drive safe. See you in a bit.”

“See you, Andy,” I unplugged my phone from the charger.

Pressing it to my ear, I pressed my start button and turned it off. I climbed out of my car and started walking to the store.

“Love you,” She sing-songed playfully.

“Love you, too,” I replied. Opening the door, a worker greeted me with a smile. “I’m about to order.”

Shoving my phone in my back pocket, I gave the worker an awkward smile before telling him my order. I ended up getting seven bags instead of five. Just in case. Dani really liked the stuff and Jin could smash an entire bag by himself. While I waited for the cheese pizza to come out of the oven, my phone started ringing.

“Hello?” I answered, unable to check the caller ID while the cashier shoved the crazy bread into my arms.

“I heard from a little bird that you’re thinking about competing again.”

I grinned and thanked the cashier as she handed me my other pizza. 

“Hello to you, too, Frank,” I replied. “And your little birdie wouldn’t happen to be Hoseok, would it?”

Frank and Sarah Boone had become a part of my life after the accident. They ran a local support group to help those affected by drunk drivers to get connected with resources and therapy. The two had lost their son when he decided to drive home drunk from a party and used the group as their own coping mechanism. They were wonderful people and owned their own joint coffee shop and bookstore in Denver. 

“Won’t say names,” He chuckled, “But it might have come from a certain part-timer. So, is it true?”

I placed the boxes in the passenger seat and rounded my car. This was not a conversation I was expecting to happen today. I had brought up the idea to Hoseok since the Olympics were coming up next year, but I was not committed to it. I was enjoying my new job coaching and did not think I was in any condition for competition. When he brought up the Paralympics I laughed. Those competitors were in better shape than I was, and I doubted I would qualify. I was disabled but my disability did not (as far as I knew) carry over into the pool.

“I was just talking shit, Frank,” Backing out of the parking space, I put in Hoseok’s address and started to drive. Switching over to my car’s phone, I put my phone down and looked at the road. “You know I’m happy with my life right now.”

He made a grunting noise that told me he did not really believe me. No one did. All of them were sure I was miserable about my career ending far before its time, and while that may be true, I felt more loss about the life I was supposed to have than winning medals. I missed Namjoon more than any medal. Frank and Sarah understood that.

“I know that,” He cleared his throat, and I could hear the congestion. Frank had come down with a nasty case of walking pneumonia two weeks ago and was still recovering. “Just got a little excited is all. It would be nice to see you putting yourself back out there.”

It would be nice to see myself back in the pool, I could admit that. I had dreams of it at times. Being a competitor was a part of who I was. From the first time my dad took me to my swim classes when I was six all the way until I claimed my eighth Olympic medal, everyone had said there was nothing I hated more than losing. I was fiery, free-spirited, and kept my eyes on the prize. It was the thing Namjoon loved about me the most. That made me frown.

“I left a champ,” I forced a laugh. “Need to save some gold for the rest of them.”

Hiding behind humor was a pastime. 

Frank laughed, oblivious to the hollowness in my tone. “Heard they have a new guy taking your place.”

That made me snort, “He’s not taking my spot. Totally different competitions, my friend.”

“Winning gold like you, that’s for damn sure.”

It must be Jimin Park. The kid turned up on the scene a year after my accident. He was a very, very talented swimmer. Fast as a bullet with the best butterflies I had ever seen, Park was a force to be reckoned with in the men’s league. It was a joy to watch him swim and this year would be his first Olympics. Hoseok and I were very excited to watch him.

“If you’re talking about Park,” I chuckled. “He’s far from new. He’s been competing for a few years now. First Olympics, though.”

“He’s young, ain’t he?”

I nodded, “23, I think.”

Truthfully, I did not know how old he was. I remember the buzz around how young he was when he first broke out on the scene. He was eighteen when he took home gold all season before a family emergency took him out of the Olympics last minute. No one knew what really happened, but his team had said his brother was in an accident, tragically losing his life, and Jimin was prioritizing his family. He’s competed every year since and with the Olympics next year, I was certain Park would be there. He deserved it.

I was parked in front of the house now and from the cars outside, I was the last person to arrive. Frank and I talked for a few moments. It was cute how much he had learned about swimming so we could be buddies. Sarah was the only person who recognized my face when I first started going to the meetings and her husband was determined to get me to open after weeks of sitting in bitter silence in the back. 

We hung up after I promised I would make it to the meeting next Thursday. Frank was not happy about me skipping the past two weeks, but understood I was taking some time to myself. My boys were going to compete this year, I had fought tooth and nail for that funding, and the extra hours at school were exhausting. Jeremy and Evan showed promise, but they knew how to drive me up the wall with all of their simple mistakes.

As I suspected, the party was in full swing. Matilda and Minho were laughing loudly on the sofa, Hoseok sporting a beer in the recliner next to them, and Dani practicing her gymnastics in the middle of it all. I could hear the commentators talking animatedly about the girls, who they believed would come out on top and highlights from the night before, but I never really paid them any mind.

“Pizza’s here!” Minho boomed, practically running to greet me.

I laughed, handing over the boxes, “Need help carrying the rest in.”

Matilda offered, happily taking my car keys and leaving the house. Minho had disappeared into the kitchen. Dani spared me enough attention for a smile and wave before launching into excited pleas for me to watch her new moves. 

“Super cool, babe,” I smiled sweetly after her handstand. Dani was not particularly good at gymnastics. She started later than the other girls, rarely did anything she was actively afraid of, and hated her coach. Andy was already looking for a better gym, but I just thought she should start pointing her in another direction. Dani loved dancing and she would be a wonderful ballerina or figure skater if given the proper training. The Kim’s, however, seemed fine watching her deal with gymnastics and cheerleading. “You’re getting better.”

Dani beamed, “Daddy said the same thing.”

Flipping the right way around, her hair coming out of its messily tied bun and falling down past her shoulders. Brown, loose waves made her look so much younger than her eight years, her small stature only selling the illusion even more. Her skin was smooth, and she always looked as though she had been playing outside in the sun, a constant tinge of pink beneath her sandy skin. Her features favored her father, large eyes, long face, and plush, pillow-like lips, but after meeting Andy’s parents, I could see her grandmother hidden within the mischievous glint in her eyes and too small ears.

“Your dad’s a smart guy,” I joked. 

She continued to babble away as I made myself more comfortable, kicking off my shoes and tossing my hat onto the small buffet table that sat above the shoe rack. Matilda came back inside, her arms filled with bags of bread, and I took two from the pile. With a thankful, thin-lipped grin, she also complimented Dani’s moves before disappearing around the corner in the direction of the kitchen.

“Dani,” Hoseok seemed to have finally grown tired of hearing the girl talk. I would imagine this was all he had been hearing since he arrived. “Do you want to color with me?”

The little girl clapped happily, her eyes bright and shining, before abandoning her mat to gather a few coloring books and her massive hoard of crayons. Hoseok looked at me then, a sly smile on his face before winking. I chuckled and shook my head. He always did that to make her shut up. 

I left the living room before Dani came back. I loved her dearly, but I could admit she talked too much. It was a good thing for a kid her age to be so social but that did not mean I wanted to hear her every waking thought. Andrea and Seokjin were the only parents in our little group, and I imagined it would stay that way for a while. Even if my dreams of children were still alive, I did not have anybody I wanted to take on that responsibility with.

Minho was eating the pizza, as expected, while Matilda had already claimed her own bag of Crazy Bread. Andy and Jin were snuggled up at their dining table, his arms securing her to his chest, and she curled into him. I loved watching them together. I had grown up in a house with two people who hated one another, barely kept up a facade of civility before my mother skipped down to be with her new boyfriend in Florida leaving my dad and I behind in Pennsylvania. We made it work but things were never the same after that. It made me happy to know little Dani would feel the love radiating in her home as she grew up. I had never seen two people so enamored with one another in my life- not even Namjoon and I.

“How was therapy?” Minho asked after we exchanged pleasantries. “Hoseok said you were talking about competing next season.”

I laughed in disbelief. That man did not know how to keep his mouth shut. I said the same thing I told Frank over the phone, and he scoffed. Minho never truly laughed, if I was honest. It was always a snicker, scoff, or chuckle. He was a man of little words and even fewer outbursts of joy, and I found his versions of those things just as reserved as the rest of him. He was the most expressive when he smiled, but those were just as rare as a genuine laugh. Dani managed to squeeze more out of him than anybody else. 

“Stop meddling!” Andy scolded the other man from her spot in Seokjin’s lap. 

“Never,” My friend replied, amusement clear in his voice.

“Never!” Dani echoed, voice louder than Hoseok’s. She was giggling happily alongside him, and I rolled my eyes. He was her favorite. “Never!” She repeated again, pleased when Hoseok laughed. “Never!”

“That’s enough,” Jin’s voice was even and smooth.

Dani did not shout again but we could all hear her and Hoseok attempting to cover up their laughter. Andy smiled fondly. Their little friendship had warmed her heart. After Dani, Andrea had been diagnosed with cervical cancer. It had come back six times before her doctor said she needed to get a hysterectomy. She grieved the children they would never have, the large family she dreamed of stolen from her, but once Dani was old enough to walk, she had been glued to Hoseok’s hip.

Hoseok for all he spoke about never wanting children, he adored Dani. His family was small, he and his sister the only children, but they were extremely close. She lived in New York City as a fashion designer and got married last year, and I always had the feeling Hoseok felt lonely without her. Dani was a welcome break from routine and made him feel special. It was sweet but I hoped my friend would find someone to share his life with someday. 

“It’s starting,” Hoseok announced.

It was a great day for the U.S. Opal Simmons was one to look out for. She was the oldest woman on the team, a shocking 24, but she could out swim a vast majority of them. Her freestyles were amazing, earning her a gold with Japan just a few points behind. I was hopeful she would be able to come out on top in her distance swim. While not the fastest in the pool, the girl knew how to pace herself. The cameras cut to the shot of one of her coaches smiling triumphantly at the performance.

He was a good friend of mine, Oswald Bunch. He had been heavily involved with the Olympics for years now, promoted to one of the lead coaches back in 2020, but I remembered when he was still competing. A few years older than me, Ozzie was known for his backstrokes and long-distance swimming, and we bonded whenever we got the chance to meet in London back in 2012.

That was my first Olympics. I was a fresh-faced 20-year-old on a mission. My team at the time was stoked to have me around and I was excited to be there. I had built up a solid reputation over the course of two years, winning seven medals my first adult-competitive season, and the high was incredible. Back then, I was always the one to beat at the breaststroke and therefore, the medleys were in my favor as well. I walked away with 4 golds that year, and again in 2016. The accident happened a year later, but I left the competitive world with 8 gold Olympic medals and 19 world champion gold medals. Katie Ledecky held the record now, but for a time, I was the most decorated female swimmer in history. I was excited when I was finally passed up, happy for the younger woman.

Ozzie was the man, but sadly never got out of Michael Phelp’s shadow. It was not his fault. That man was insane in the water and would become the most decorated Olympian ever. Bunch was a great swimmer, but I did not know a single person who could compare to Phelps. Hoseok, maybe, but he only had 12 gold medals. Phelps had 23.

“Simmons looks great out there,” Hoseok praised, a large smile on his face.

“Her butterflies could use a little work,” I murmured back, already seeing how I could fix it with some extra exercises. “It’s slowing down her freestyle. What else is she scheduled for?”

“I think she’s doing the 200-meter freestyles and the medley relay,” He replied, taking a sip of his beer. “Bunch is banking on her pacing.”

“She won’t win those,” I was positive. “She’s just going to get tired. Breaststrokes are obviously not her thing.”

He laughed, “You’re the breaststroke queen, Y/N. No one's as good as yours.”

I shrugged, “Ledecky is a great swimmer.”

“Never said she wasn’t,” He sipped. “Her freestyles are killer. Girls could never beat you in breaststroke or a medley. You’re untouchable there.”

It made me smile despite myself. Hoseok was right, those were my competitions. Even if Katie had surpassed my record for most gold medals ever, I still had more Olympic medals than she did, and they were in completely different events. I could have kept my title had the accident never happened. I would have. Even if we were friendly, Ledecky would have been my competition, and I would have fought hard to keep the record.

“What’s Jimin doing this year?” Matilda asked as the women’s scores were posted. Opal would be a strong contender. “Anyone know?”

I nodded, “I haven’t watched every competition, but he’s sticking to what he does best. Didn’t he swim the 200 yesterday?”

“Yeah,” Hoseok replied. “He’s skipping out today and doing his individual tomorrow. Swimming back-to-back after that. Kid’s a fucking animal in the water.”

I couldn't agree more. As I stared at Opal’s smiling face, her pale blonde hair and bright blue eyes, I wished I had been able to watch Jimin instead. She was cold and impassive even with a large, perfectly white grin that took up most of her face. In fact, I found her quite boring outside of the water. No flair or features that set her apart. Just a tall, well-built blonde with a nice smile. Ozzie would have to work hard to make her memorable.

“Simmons did well,” I yawned. “It’s getting late, though, and I have work in the morning.”

The goodbyes were quick, and Dani made me promise to take her roller skating soon. There was a girl at school making fun of her and she wanted her “super cool” and “famous” aunt to tell them off. We all laughed, and I told her we could go this weekend after gymnastics practice. 

My drive home was uneventful. It was already dark out, something that bothered me more than I would ever admit out loud, and I never turned on the radio. I preferred to drive in absolute silence, eyes and ears glued to the road. I had only started talking on the phone recently.

I was much worse after the accident. I refused to get inside of a car for weeks and if I did, I was a mess. No one was allowed to be a distracted driver either. No radio, no phone, no conversations. Nothing. Jin had been the default chauffeur during that time and put up with my anxiety better than the others.

It was close to a year before I tried to sit in the front seat again. Another five before I got behind the wheel. For hours I would sit in the garage with my hands on the steering wheel staring off into the distance. I was still in a wheelchair for most of my daily activities and a very obvious limp made me too self-conscious to be seen. Isolating was easy. Keeping the others away was more difficult.

My drives started with me just backing out of the driveway. I went around the block a few weeks later, hands shaking and Andy trying her best to soothe me in the passenger seat. I did not drive past the Whole Foods two minutes away from my house until after the second year. Things were easier after I ditched the wheelchair and got more open to the idea of therapy.

Moving out of Denver was the best decision I ever made, the Springs were easier to drive in and the traffic was not as awful. Andrea and Jin bought in Black Forest once I was settled in Briargate, so loneliness was never an option.

Matilda almost moved in after the housewarming party Andy threw for me. She said it was far too big for one person and the neighborhood was to die for. I laughed her off at the time not really wanting to admit how nice it sounded.

Nestled in Fairfax, my house was a beautiful piece of architecture. The striking brick and wood front exterior provided a warm welcome, with teal trimmings bringing a fresh feeling to the otherwise plain color scheme. With five bedrooms and four bathrooms, I dreamed of the day I was able to fill them all. A dream that I hoped would come before I hit 35.

 Pulling up to the house, I waved to Chika next door. The old woman raised her hand, still nursing a large mug of what I assumed to be tea and smiled. They were lovely people and we often helped one another out whenever we could. Chika liked to bring over food if she cooked and I paid my landscapers to keep with their lawn.

“Late night?” Chika called out from her front porch. 

“Went to a friend’s house,” I replied.

“Good,” She meant it. “Glad to see you getting out of the house.”

I smiled but was not sure how well she could see my face in the dark.

“Yeah. Night, Chika.”

“Night, Y/N.”

I showered quickly and sipped on a cup of chamomile tea before heading off to bed. After taking my night medications, one to force myself to sleep while the other blocked the never-ending nightmares, I climbed into bed. I was able to play a single game of solitaire before they both kicked in. I fell asleep with the sound of gentle rain humming in the background.

“Let’s go, guys!” I yelled, blowing my whistle.

The twelve boys waited, their small talk coming to an abrupt end. We had just finished warming up and I allowed all of them a short water break. I was a huge advocate for rest periods. No one needed to pull a muscle or fatigue early due to over working. I had a 2800-yard routine prepared, 800 of those done during our warm-ups, and the rest divided between our main set and cooldowns.

Jordan, our captain, was smiling happily. He was such an excited kid, and his positivity was contagious. While some of the boys were disappointed when I first chose him to replace our old captain after his graduation, I was sure his spirit would do everyone some good. It did not take long for the others to come around and he was beloved.

“Alright, so we have a 1600 main set. In between each of our reps, we will be doing a switch out of easy breast and backstrokes. Clear?”

“Crystal!” They all replied in unison.

“Alright. That's what I like to hear,” Flipping through my clipboard was more for show than anything. I used to rely on it heavily when I first started teaching since brain damage messed with my short-term memory, but I had been doing this long enough to know what was happening. Now it was just a way for me to write notes about their performances. “We’re starting with a 4x100 with 15-second rest; the first 25 butterfly. 3x100 with 10-second rest; again, first 25 butterfly. Following?”

No questions were asked, and a few guys voiced they were good for me to keep going.

“Good. Then we have a 2x100 with 5-second rest. First 25?”

“Butterfly,” Jordan replied.

“Thank you, Abbot. Okay, and we’re finishing up with 8x50 freestyle. Fast and easy.”

All twelve of them began to prepare to take their mark. One by one they stood on their blocks and waited for me to make the call. I admired them all for a moment. You could see the difference in each one of them. Those who were confident stood tall, their shoulders squared, and head held high. Newcomers were still figuring out their place on the team but were eager to prove themselves. Two of them would be leaving us this year, Gabriel and Marcus, and neither one of them were continuing to swim after graduation. It was a sad thought, but I was happy with how they carried themselves. They had both come a long way.

“Take your mark,” My voice echoed. Each boy got into their starting position as I watched them like a hawk. One of the freshmen, Phineas, needed major work on his form. I would talk to Jordan about it. Grabbing hold of my stopwatch, I took a deep breath. “Go!”

Marcus was the first in, like always, and I ignored him. I knew he was fully capable of taking care of himself. Phineas was the weakest link in my chain right now. He was struggling, his arms growing tired and his speed nonexistent. The other freshmen, Tobias, or as the guys called him, Twig, was not much better. He had more strength, but I chopped that up to his size. I would need to really start working some more beginner drills to get them in shape. Jordan and Gabriel would be more than happy to give up a Saturday or two to help out. 

Marcus was the first one finished and I marked his time. Still a tenth of a second faster than Jordan. After Jordan came Gabriel and then Joseph and Anthony. I was disappointed in Jett’s time, but I would invite him to the weekend practices with the others. He needed some foot and hip exercises. Twig came in before Phineas, but every other boy was already out of the water by the time they made it back. Phineas was visibly upset, and I made a note to pull him to the side after practice to cheer him up. 

Practices typically lasted two hours and the boys swam hard. Phineas did, in fact, perk up after I told him I was noticing tons of improvements in his performance. Twig just seemed happy he was not the worst guy in the water. After talking it out with Jordan, we decided on a good weekend time for extra practices, and I stayed behind to print off a poster and signup sheets for the rest of the boys. I had a feeling almost everyone except Marcus would show. He had a part-time job now and his weekends were full. 

Sitting in my office, I poured over my observations and timecards. With a team this large I should have an extra set of hands to help with timing. I sent an email to the principal asking about helpers and got back to the nitty gritty. 

All of them could work on something. Phineas might have needed the most work, Twig not far behind him, but my most seasoned swimmers had room for improvement. Jett was still struggling with maximizing propulsion, Anthony and Milo needed to get better water balance, and Gabriel’s pull could be better. Even my best swimmers, Jordan and Marcus, could use a bit of refinement in technique. It was nitpicking but they were too talented to give up on their potential.

It was close to nine when my phone began to ring. I knew it could not be any of my usual calls. Andy was working nights this week and Jin was fast asleep at home with Dani. Minho was in bed by eight, Matilda would never bother me this late, and Hoseok hated phone calls. Checking the caller ID, I was shocked to see Ozzie’s name.

“Hello?” I answered tentatively, afraid he might have called me by accident.

“Otter,” Ozzie greeted me happily. He seemed so delighted that I answered, I smiled even though I hated the nickname. “How’s life going?”

I chuckled, “Rockin’ and rollin’. Saw your girl last night. Looks great, Oz.”

“Appreciate it,” He was so dismissive of it I became interested. This was not a catch-up phone call or else he might have hooked onto the bait. My stomach twisted in anticipation. If it was not for pleasantries, then it was for work and that was something to be excited about. “Still teaching high school?”

“Mhm,” I fiddled with my pencil, papers forgotten. “My boys team is strong. I only have three girls that signed up so we’re just training during P.E. and hoping some more join.”

We chatted a bit more about the team. The longer it went on the more knots I had. Oswald was fishing for something, and I wanted to figure out what. After telling him about Phineas, I asked what the random call was about.

“Always cutting to the chase,” He joked.

I did not laugh.

“Alright, you caught me,” Ozzie sighed. “Look, the Olympic team is looking for another assistant coach and your name came up a few times.”

My mouth went dry. I had heard about Tiara Marsh leaving to focus on her family. She had a baby and stepped down a few months after coming back from maternity leave. I respected the decision and messaged her my congratulations. Ozzie had taken the lead coach position three years ago with Todd Packer as his partner. The other assistant, Drew Jones, was a sweet girl from what I heard and working with her would be a dream. 

Still, it was an impossible task. Trying to imagine myself on the sidelines, coaching the next big names in sporting history with a massive squad behind me made my stomach queasy. I doubt any of them respected me. My leg was ruined, my career burned out just as quickly as it started, and I never had the chance to reach my peak. Now I am a 30-year-old washed up recluse. Just thinking about the media frenzy made my breathing get a little heavier. 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Oz,” I murmured.

“I told them you wouldn’t go for it,” He replied, unsurprised. “They’re going to approach Storm Kline instead.”

“Oh,” Now I was confused. “Why’d you bring it up then?”

“Because I got to thinking,” I braced myself. Ozzie was known for his big, bright, dumb, impulsive ideas. “I knew the Olympics would be asking too much of you. Cameras and interviews are the last thing you want after the fucking circus you went through last time.”

That was an understatement. Circus did not even begin to describe the absolute hell the media put me through after the accident. So many speculations and insensitive remarks managed to ruin any peace I could have gotten during that time.

While I was in a coma, no one knowing if I would ever wake up again, the news thought it wise to harass my friends and family. My old coach, Victor Stanley, was assaulted whenever he left the hospital. When news got out that Namjoon was pulled off life support, his mother and father were so sick and tired of people parked outside their house they packed up and moved away before I even woke up. I wanted nothing to do with the media after that.

“It’s a little different but I think you’d be a great fit for the job,” Ozzie continued. “One of my boys, Jimin Park, is in need of a personal coach. His mom is sick and he’s wanting to stay in Michigan for as long as he can before coming out to the Springs to start training for Paris.

“I almost called Jung, but I don’t think the two of them would get along well enough for this to work. You’re the only person I know I can trust with him, and from what I’m hearing, you’re one hell of a coach already.”

This was somehow even more nerve wracking than the assistant position. I had never trained one-on-one before, at least, not long term. I was sure I could do it, but a high schooler was very different from an Olympic athlete relying on me to keep him in shape for the season. 

“What happened to Hamilton?” I asked, still unable to wrap my head around the situation. “I thought he was Park’s personal trainer.”

“He was but the two fell out when Jimin decided to stay in Michigan. You know how Matt is.”

That I did. Matthew Hamilton was a massive asshole, and that was putting it lightly. He was one of the best trainers around and got results which was why he still had a job despite his rotten attitude. I had the misfortune of running into him quite a few times over the years and my distaste only grew with each passing. I could imagine that conversation not going over particularly well.

“But what about my team?” I asked, staring at my desk. All of my plans and strategies were mapped out and I was ready to put them to use. My boys were counting on me and leaving them felt wrong. “I don’t want to leave them high and dry, Oz.”

“Ask Hoseok to cover for you,” I rolled my eyes at his blase attitude.

“This is my team.”

“And this is Jimin Park.”

I hated that I understood where he was coming from. Most of my boys would never go off to swim professionally and their skill set was not on par with anyone out right now. They were not committed to the strict regime that would take and I did not get paid well enough to justify the extra hours. Jimin, however, would pay me extremely well and I would get that experience under my belt. I might even learn a few new things to add to my own drills.

“Give me a few days to think about it,” I finally conceded. “And set up a phone call, or meeting, or something with the kid. Need to make sure we’re on the same page before we waste one another’s time.”

Ozzie laughed, “I think you’ll get along just fine, but sure. I think he’d appreciate the gesture.”

Nothing of much importance was said after that. We hung up with promises of talking soon and then I was alone once more. My office was still just as messy and swamped with paperwork as it had been before, but it all looked different. It felt like I was already gone, and a deep homesickness settled in my chest. I stared at the papers in front of me and sighed before shooting a text to Hoseok.

As I expected, everyone had told me to jump at the opportunity. Hoseok even said if I didn’t, I would be the biggest idiot he had ever met. Matilda asked if she could come (I told her no), and Dani just seemed bummed that we could not hang out anymore. Andy and Jin were the most supportive of the situation while Minho the most cautious. He was worried about the media catching wind of something and causing a frenzy. After Matila pointed out how old news I was, I felt a little less afraid of that possibility even if it was a hit to my ego.

Ozzie seemed pumped when I told him I was open to the idea if Jimin and I seemed to mesh well. I was firm in my decision to talk to him before making any concrete plans, and from what Ozzie told me, my future student was extremely receptive to the idea. I also learned that Opal was jealous of her fellow Olympian, but I tried not to let that puff up my chest. 

That was why I was sitting in my home office, hair nicely styled and a light layer of makeup on waiting for Jimin to join our Zoom call. I wore blue since Ozzie said it was his favorite color, but the material was slowly driving me insane. While the color was nice, deep blue and sparkled whenever the light hit it, it was scratchy and irritated the skin around my chest and shoulders. I almost got up to change but a small icon with the letters ‘JP’ in the center popped up before I could.

“Hello?” A soft voice called out.

“Hey,” I replied with an awkward wave. “Can you see me?”

“Yeah, can you see me?”

I shook my head, “Just your icon.”

Cursing under his breath, Jimin apologized for the tech issues. I adored how nice he was to listen to. It was unique, gentle and raspy, but also feminine in its softness. There was no bass or hardness, every sound and syllable light and airy with self-depreciating laughter after every insult he threw at himself. Apparently, Jimin was not great with technology and always had a difficult time with cyber meetings.

“This is fine with me,” I tried to reassure him. “I don’t need to see your face to talk.”

“No,” He agreed, “But it’s a little awkward for you to have your camera on and mine’s off.”

I could hear him clicking around. “I’ll turn mine off, too, if that helps.”

He shut that down immediately and continued clicking and typing. After a few more minutes, he found his problem. Then the icon was gone and there he was.

His face was round, his cheeks plump, and chin soft. The first thing I noticed about him was his lips. They were rounded and plump like a baby duck with a soft, heart shaped cupid’s bow that led up a small, button nose. Everything about his face was soft except his eyes which were almond shaped and flicked outwards like a cat’s. His hair was pitch black and parted down the middle, framing his face and making his pale skin look like snow. When he caught a glimpse of himself in the camera a large smile took over his face and I felt the wind get knocked out of me. 

“Can you see me?” He asked.

I nodded, “Yeah, I think we’re in the clear.”

Neither one of us knew what to say for a moment. He swirled around in his chair in search of his water bottle. He stood up, excusing himself for a moment. He was also wearing a blue shirt, a pair of black pants, and seemed just as nervous as I did. He left the room while I sat and thought about him.

There was one word to describe Jimin: pretty. His soft lines and tiny waist made him look so much smaller than I had imagined him. All of the years seeing him on the tv did nothing to compare to watching him walk around a little room in his home. Without a cap and goggles, Jimin was angelic, and I felt uneasy. How was I supposed to work with someone I found this attractive?

“Sorry,” He was back now, a large Yeti cup in hand. “I should’ve made sure I had this already.”

“No worries. I’m not in any rush.”

He sat back down, and I finally noticed the large oval necklace he was wearing. I did not know what it could mean to him, but I had seen him with it a few times at events. It was simple and silver, no gem in the center of the pendant, and sat directly over his heart. He took a sip from his cup, snapping me back to action.

“How’s your mother doing?” I asked. “Ozzie told me she wasn’t well.”

His expression saddened me, and I hated that I brought it up. I knew how much I did not enjoy talking about Namjoon’s death, and while his mother was still alive, she was not well. Unfortunately, I could not take the question back.

“I’m not sure how much you know,” He started, leaning back in the leather computer chair. “She has melanoma and isn’t doing chemotherapy anymore. I’m staying in Michigan so I can spend as much time with her as possible.”

My heart ached for him and his family. Cancer had a reputation for ripping families apart and I could only imagine how this was affecting the young swimmer. My own grief was long and drawn out, guilt and shame hanging over my head for years before I was finally able to let it go, but the death itself was swift. Joon was dead and buried before I woke up from the coma, but I could recall every detail of that hospital room when Victor told me what happened. I hated to think about watching the life slip from him, knowing he would die, and knowing there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.

“I understand. I’m really sorry to hear that.”

I knew it was inadequate, but I did not know this man well enough to say my thoughts out loud. Maybe later, after a few weeks of training together, I could get the courage to let him know I would be there if he needed someone to talk to. I knew all about navigating grief and I would happily help him stay motivated through this horrible, tragic time. Jimin stayed quiet so I took it upon myself to get the ball rolling again.

“I know you’re going through a difficult time right now, and I just want you to know that I get it and I see you. If we work together, I will make sure your mental health comes first. Whatever you need, whatever your family needs, will always come before getting in the pool.

“You were working with Hamilton before this, and whatever happened between you two- I don’t know, that’s none of my business, but I can promise you I will try my best to make sure our professional relationship doesn’t reach that point. Just tell me what’s up and I’ll make it work.”

Jimin smiled a small, sad smile that paled in comparison to that blinding show of teeth earlier. My eyes could not help their roaming and I felt guilty. There was a chance we would be working together, and I could not feel this way about him if that time came. I could only hope that if we did decide to move forward with this arrangement, any affections I could have for him would get buried. I would have to talk to Hoseok about this.

“I have to take her to appointments once a week,” He replied, voice small and eyes staring at something off camera. “She’s not getting her chemo anymore but still goes to see her doctor often to manage symptoms as best she can. She also has a dance class every Sunday morning and I will be going with her.”

I nodded, “I can live with that. As long as you’re still putting in work you can take your mom anywhere.”

He took a deep breath and finally looked at the camera again. The vulnerability I found there took me off guard. Jimin must be someone who wears their emotions on their sleeve, and I would have to learn to nurture that. Namjoon always told me I needed to work on being more sensitive to others, a skill I had yet to master. 

“Matt didn’t like how much time I spent out of the pool. I understand where he’s coming from but I’m hoping we can come up with a training schedule that works well for the both of us. I feel bad enough pulling you away from your life, and I don’t want my personal shit to bleed into what you’re going through.”

It was a kind gesture, one I appreciated, but he needed to get over it. I told him in so many words that I was happy to help him.

“Trust me,” I said. “If I didn’t want to do this then we wouldn’t be talking.”

Jimin seemed to like my bluntness and I was fond of his over-analytical anxiety. The way he fidgeted reminded me of Namjoon, his forward and direct confrontation of his emotions and needs so strikingly similar it made it nearly impossible for me to dislike him. I don’t think a person alive could dislike this man. 

“I can be in Ann Arbor next week,” Jimin had gone on another rant about inconveniencing me and I shut it down. “Everything here is already squared away. We can discuss it more later, how does that sound?”

He smiled wearily, his nerves causing him to squirm in his seat. 

“I’m really looking forward to working with you, Y/N.”

I hoped my expression looked as sincere as I felt, “I’ll take care of you, kiddo.”

Pulling a face, Jimin laughed heartily. Triumphant, I smiled brazenly, his laughter contagious. I made a note to pull out a few age jokes now and then if it meant making him smile like that. 

“I’m an adult man, I’ll have you know,” He was still laughing.

“Could’ve fooled me,” I teased.

“We’re going to get along just fine,” He seemed more confident than ever, and it warmed my heart. “Let me know when you’re expected to get here. Do you have my number?”

We exchanged our contact details. After days of talking over email, I finally found a smiley face emoji in my notifications, a Michigan area code attached. Saving his number, I replied with the old woman emoji earning myself another laugh. 

“Talk to you later, Park.”

“See you, coach.”

I left the meeting, my chest much lighter after talking to him. He was a sweet man and not half bad to look at. I was a few years older but not disgustingly so, and he was more than available from the sound of things. Realizing the direction my thoughts were going in, I stood up from the chair to start writing out some drills and scheduling prototypes. Before I could get out of the door, however, my phone vibrated in my hand.

Jimin: 👶

I did not respond until I had my flight booked.

Me: I’m flying in on Tuesday. Know a good place to stay?

He replied a few minutes later.

Jimin: Do you need a lot of space?

Me: Not really

Jimin: One of my neighbors has their mother-in-law suite for rent. I could probably cut you a good deal with them.

I smiled. He really was a sweetheart. 

Me: Thank you. And no deals. I can pay for myself.

Jimin: My mother would be very upset if I didn’t at least try.

Jimin: I was raised to respect the elderly.

I laughed out loud, thoroughly amused. I had a feeling he was testing the waters after I poked fun at him earlier. Jimin was probably used to the stick stuck up Hamilton’s ass. He was in for a treat. At the pool I was cool and collected but I could cut up with the best of them. 

Me: Sorry, couldn’t hear you over the sound of my hip breaking

I was practically giddy with excitement waiting for his response. It had been such a long time since someone joked around with me like this. Hoseok tried but he was awful at taking a joke, so I stopped poking the bear. It was refreshing and all too familiar. 

Jimin: I’ll get you one of those life alerts just in case.

Was he flirting with me? Did I care? Shrugging, I went along with it. I would remain strictly professional while we worked together, but if things developed after that I would let them. Happily. I barely knew this guy, but I remember this feeling. It was the first time since Joon’s death that it showed itself to me and I wanted to hold onto it.

First work then play, I told myself. 

Who knows? This little bit of infatuation could fade just as quickly as it came, and I would leave Ann Arbor with a new friend instead. Might even be able to score a steady job with the kid if things worked out. My life in Colorado would remain untouched, my friends happily accepting a new kid in the group when he came to visit, and my house just as bare and empty as it always had been. The years continuing to pass me by.

I tried not to think about why that thought made me want to cry.

“I told you I’m fine,” I sighed into the phone, waiting at the baggage claim for my things. “You’re in rare form today.”

Andrea laughed, the sound slightly hysterical and I winced. That was the wrong thing to say, but she was driving me insane. I had traveled around the world multiple times, and she was acting like Michigan was going to kill me.

“Well excuse me for worrying,” Andy bit back, her tone clipped and harsh.

“I’m sorry,” I heaved one of my bags off the conveyor belt. “I know you’re just looking out for me, but I promise you I’m fine Andrea. You’ll be my first phone call if that changes.”

The other bag finally popped up and I quickly snatched it. Slinging the large duffle bag over my shoulder, I adjusted it until it rested comfortably on my shoulders. Lifting the handlebar off my large suitcase, I drug it behind me while I followed the signs for the exit. Jimin said he arranged for someone to pick me up but did not specify who. He was busy with a few interviews this morning and could not get me himself. He had been very disappointed about it.

“I know I’m nagging,” Andy groaned. “Scratch that. I’m acting like a total helicopter parent.”

I laughed, “Your husband had been even worse. The man tried to book me a charter flight because he was worried about my leg in an airport. What the fuck does that even mean?”

Everyone had been super happy for me, especially my team. Those boys almost cried when I told them who I was helping out and Jordan begged me to bring him back something autographed. None of them seemed as familiar with my own background but I was fine with that. All of them took to Hoseok rather well, except for Marcus who made me swear to come back before school let out. I did not tell them I was planning to make monthly trips to give Jimin some space with his mom. I was sure that surprise would go over very, very well.

Despite his indifference when I was first talking about the job, Seokjin became an overprotective dad as soon as I made him aware my flights were booked. He was quick to cancel them and put in a few calls of his own. Jin was an operations manager for Delta airlines and knew plenty of pilots. He was able to get me a plane to land in Willow Run out in Ypsilanti, but I quickly intervened and told him a normal flight was perfect. I rebooked my tickets and flew into Detroit Metro at 10 am.

Andy snorted, “He means well.”

It was snowing in Michigan, and I was finally hit with the realization that I would be seeing far more of it here than I ever did back in Colorado. It was only mid-September, so it was still light and melted away quickly. I would have to ask Jimin if it stayed this calm into December, but I had a feeling things would pick up by late November. 

It was a very cold morning in Detroit, and I was excited to get into a heated car. Getting off the phone with Andy, I quickly sent Jimin a quick text message letting him know I was outside and looking for my ride. A loud honk made my jump, almost dropping my phone in the process.

Pulled up at the curb was a navy-blue Volkswagen Beetle. I could tell from its body that it was an older model, and it was a convertible. Sitting behind the wheel was a little old lady, a pair of gardening gloves on her hands and a pair of large, hexagon sunglasses taking up most of her face. Her face was familiar, and it hit me. Sitting behind that wheel was Jimin’s mother. 

She smiled at me and waved, beckoning me closer to the little car. I forced myself to smile back. My nerves made it feel damn near impossible, but I managed. Opening the door, I did not know where to put my things. The backseat was so small.

“There’s a lever on that side that’ll push it up. You should be able to get everything to fit if you try hard enough.”

Fumbling around, I finally found the little handle and pulled up. The seat lurched forward, folding in on itself, and I clumsily shoved my suitcase into the backseat. It smelled like stale cigarettes and fake pine, but when you had a car this old it usually had history. I was excited to pick up my new car from the dealership. My Porsche already had a difficult time driving around Colorado and I did not think it would survive the heavy winters in Michigan, so I decided to leave it home and get an Altima. I had the money and could easily get rid of it. Tilly had been talking about needing an upgrade. 

Finally managing to get both bags into the backseat, I put the seat back and got into the car. Closing the door, I sighed in content. The heaters were at full blast and pointed directly at my cold face. Buckling my seatbelt, I leaned back and tried to relax after the long day of flying. Jimin’s mother pulled off the curb.

“It’s cold out there,” She laughed, her voice just as sickeningly sweet as her son’s. “Glad you were able to make it okay.”

I nodded, “I’m surprised to see it snowing so early. We don’t usually get anything until closer to Thanksgiving.”

“Colorado, right?” I could hear a faint accent and I remembered that Jimin was first-generation Korean American. Both of his parents moved to the states before he and his brother were born. Media outlets loved talking about it, but I was not sure how much he enjoyed discussing his personal life. While he came off as a sweet and mild-mannered man, he kept his personal life private. “I’ve heard it’s very pretty.”

“It is. Too expensive, but very, very pretty.”

Then she was fiddling around with the radio, and I finally cracked a genuine smile. I was not sure how much work had been done on her car, but I was positive the sound system had been completely redone. A brand-new radio, complete with a touch screen and Bluetooth, lit up at the touch of her fingers. A man’s voice serenaded us through the updated speakers, and I was in awe at how beautiful it sounded. I assumed he was speaking Korean and Jimin’s mother sang along fluently. 

“What’s your name again?” She asked once the song was over. Another, more upbeat song started, and she increased the volume. “Jimin told me but I’m horrible with that sort of thing. I’m Na-Yeon, but Audrey works if it’s easier for you.”

I pulled a face, “Audrey?”

“It’s my American name. It’s easier for people to pronounce and more convenient. All of us have one. Jimin’s is Christian.”

It was odd to think about. A name that was mine but not mine. Christian did not suit Jimin, but I could imagine growing up with a name that other people made fun of would be difficult. Maybe even impossible. Still, I did not feel comfortable calling the woman Audrey. She did not seem to particularly care for the name and I did not want to alienate myself from their circle for convenience's sake.

Namjoon’s mother had been similar to Na-Yeon, always afraid her culture and customs would make me uncomfortable or burdened, but I managed to calm her fears and reassure her after years of showing up to Chuseok with a smile on my face and food in my hands.

“I like Na-Yeon,” I finally replied, voice small. “It’s nice. I’m Y/N.”

“I like Y/N,” She echoed back to me, making me grin. “It’s nice.”

It was a long drive filled with K-pop, ballads, and sporadic conversation. Na-Yeon was very funny. She sang along to every song, dancing as she went, and calling on me to sing alone. Of course, I could not speak Korean very well and hummed the melodies instead, but it appeased her. When she did speak to me it was to ask me questions about myself. 

“You’re that swimmer, aren’t you?” She asked, sparing me a look once we stopped at a redlight. “The one everyone’s trying to beat.”

I shook my head, “At one time, sure, but not anymore. I’m retired.”

Squinting her eyes at me, Na-Yeon pursed her lips. 

“We used to watch you. Haru called you a mermaid.”

 That was not too much of a shock. Jimin was swimming at that time. While I am a few years older than him, he would have been in middle school when I went to my first Olympics. He had told me he joined the swim team the year before. He said that watching Michael Phelps win 6 gold medals changed his life forever, and I could not help but agree with him. I had a huge amount of respect for my fellow Olympian and wished him well in his retirement. What shocked me the most was the mention of Jimin’s little brother. The dead brother.

“That’s sweet,” I did not know what to say. “I felt like a mermaid back then. I’m not that good anymore but I still like to swim sometimes.”

“You were in an accident,” It was not a question. “We saw it all over the news. Couldn’t believe all of those people harassing your family like that. So sorry for your loss.”

It was strange to talk about it again. I appreciated her keeping it vague. I had gone through a tremendous amount of change and growth since then, but it was nice to hear someone else validate how crazy the media frenzy was. I would not wish it upon anyone, and I was happy her family was allowed to grieve in peace. Neither Namjoon’s nor my own were allowed that luxury.

“Thank you,” I replied. “I’m sorry about Haru. I can’t imagine what your family went through.”

She smiled sadly, “I think you can.”

We did not talk much after that. The music still played, Na-Yeon still sang, and I still hummed, but we did not ask any more questions. Neither one of us wanted to bring up those hurt feelings. It was not until we turned down a long, empty road that I realized I had yet to ask her about her cancer. 

“Are you feeling okay?” I asked.

“As good as I can,” She breathed. “My boys are both worriers so don’t take anything they say to heart. Bunch of hypochondriacs.”

And even though I laughed along with her, I knew that she was lying. They were not overreacting. She was sick, refusing treatments, and letting herself die. Anyone would be worried about her. Na-Yeon must dislike being taken care of. Well, I thought she would need to get used to it. I loved spoiling others. 

“Eloise and the kids must be here,” She muttered to herself, pulling to a short driveway. 

I did not know who Eloise was, but I would soon find that out. There were two cars parked out front. One was a simple, black Tahoe with a brightly colored steering wheel cover. The other was another vintage model. Painted a pretty light, muted green the truck was in pristine condition. It was an old Ford, the branding written across the tailgate, and a spare tire was bolted to the side. I asked Na-Yeon about it and she smiled happily.

“It’s Jimin’s,” I felt my heart rate increase. “He must’ve gotten back. Pretty thing, huh?”

I nodded, not really paying attention to the truck anymore. I was about to meet Jimin for the first time and my nerves were taking over. I knew how much his looks affected me over video chat and I was afraid I would not be able to control my facial expressions in person. I was resolute not to act on whatever attraction I may have felt toward him. My professionalism would not allow it. It did not mean, however, that I wanted to discuss it with Jimin at any point. It would make him uncomfortable and affect our working environment. 

“Keep your bags in the car,” Na-Yeon told me. “Jimin’s going to take you over to meet the Andersons this afternoon.”

Walking up to the house, I was first struck by two things. The main one being the impressive teal it was painted and the other the loud talking and laughter coming from inside. It was odd. Thinking about my own parents I knew we had never been so happy. Mom had left when I was so young that I could hardly remember her, but I could recall the screaming and shouting. Dad was quiet after she left, spent most of his time locked away in the garage watching sports channels and leaving me to my own devices. 

When I started swimming it helped for a time, but when I was old enough to leave, we spoke two or three times a year. After he met Danielle, his new wife, he stopped reaching out altogether. The accident had spooked him enough to warrant holiday and birthday calls for a time, but when he had another baby those slowly faded away. My half-sister and I had never met, Danielle did not like acknowledging that my dad had a child with another woman, and it seemed as though my dad was fine with how things turned out. I dealt with it.

The laughing echoed through the house, and I could hear loud foot-steps pitter pattering on the tile floors. The house smelled heavily of kimchi and lemons making my heart ache. Joon and I used to keep the windows open for days after his mother came over to make kimchi with him. We would squat on the floor for hours, laughing and talking. I missed those days more than I realized and I smiled involuntarily. For the first time in years, it felt like coming home.

“Sorry about the smell,” Na-Yeon whispered to me. 

I shook my head and took my shoes off. “I love kimchi.”

She smiled brightly, her shoulders immediately relaxing. I was glad I had spent so much time with Namjoon and his family. Na-Yeon was someone who wanted to make others feel more comfortable even if it put her own peace at risk, but I would never ask her to change her routine for me. I loved learning about other people and her little house brought me more happiness than I thought possible. 

“Sounds like we have company!”

A short, stocky man came into the living room. He was wearing a white polo shirt and khaki shorts; his hair was very short with silver streaks starting to take over the once very black strands. Catching sight of me he smiled. 

“You must be Y/N,” The man said. “I’m James.”

His accent was much thicker than Na-Yeon’s and he introduced himself in his English name. He seemed much happier about it than his wife did, and I decided to go along with it. If he wanted me to call him James, then I would.

“Nice to meet you,” I replied, giving him a small bow.

His smile got even bigger somehow, and he returned the gesture. Na-Yeon chuckled beside me and started to speak to her husband in Korean. I picked up a few words and deduced that he was supposed to make sure I was going to get a nice lunch, and she wanted to know if he had taken care of it. He nodded and told her he had.

“Hungry?” James asked, Na-Yeon already disappearing into the house.

“Yes,” I quickly followed behind him.

“I made jjigae,” He frowned. “I can’t say it in English. Sorry.”

The house was small and warmly lit. Cream tile flooring, exposed wood beams, and white walls. Whatever loud conversation they had been having before I got here had died down, but the footsteps did not. I could hear children giggling somewhere in the little home and my curiosity peaked. I did not think they were Na-Yeon and James’s.

“I want to say it’s soup,” I kept my voice down not wanting to make him feel awkward. “Or stew, but I don’t think it matters that much.”

“What’s the difference?” James asked, just as amused as his wife at my vague knowledge of Korean words. “Soup and stew the same, no?”

I shrugged, “I have no clue. I’m a miserable cook.”

That made James laugh. We passed all of the rooms in the house, the kitchen, living room, and dining room all in the back of the house. As we passed the second room to the left, James said it had been Haru’s photography studio before he passed away, but they ended up converting it once Eloise gave birth. He did not say it out loud, but I had gathered the kids running around had been their youngest son’s. I did not know how old Haru had been when he died, but it was far too young to be having children. I was 31 and still felt ill equipped for the job. 

It was a small kitchen with very simple and plain colors. The countertops were obviously laminate, but someone had taken the time to stick on a marble patterning to make it look nicer. Black appliances clashed with the chestnut cabinets. The tiles were no longer cream but hideous black and white checker printed that clashed heavily against the olive-green backsplash. While the rest of the house seemed to go through renovations at some point, I had a feeling the kitchen remained largely untouched. 

Sitting at a small table on the other side of the room were Na-Yeon, Jimin, and a young woman. She was a cute girl, long brown hair and blue eyes, a large number of freckles across her cheeks. Her outfit was very modest, a pair of flowy cream pants and an equally flowy olive shirt. Her hair was tied back with a ribbon that matched her pants, and taking a closer look at her, she wore no makeup. A classic girl next door.

“Come sit,” Na-Yeon waved me over, her voice showing no room for argument. “Hyun-Soo is in charge of lunch.”

I was only briefly confused, the name completely unfamiliar, but by the time I sat down I was sure she was talking about James. It made sense for her to call him by his Korean name, and since I had shown no qualms about using their proper names, she saw no need to bring them up herself. 

“Nice to finally meet you,” Jimin’s sweet voice reached me, and I smiled at the sound. “I hope getting here wasn’t too bad.”

He reached out to me, and I happily took his hand in my own. The skin was soft, perfectly smooth, and warm. It was over far too quickly but my displeasure was easily hidden. Andrea always complained about my poker face and how difficult it was to get past it. She said it was too good and thus refused to ever play poker with me again. 

“It was nice,” I meant it. Na-Yeon was wonderful company. 

“Hope the concert was nice.”

That made me and Eloise laugh. Na-Yeon smacked Jimin’s arm playfully, unable to keep the smile off her face, and the two began to bicker. Having them in the same room highlighted the differences I hadn't noticed before. Jimin’s nose was closer to his father’s, his eyes, too, and both of them had a slight lisp. Na-Yeon’s teeth were perfectly white and straight while one of Jimin’s front teeth was slightly chipped. Jimin had a dimple; his mother had none. Their English soon turned to digs in Korean and I could no longer follow. A few words here and there but nothing substantial. James joined them.

“Hi,” Eloise shyly greeted me, obviously used to being left out of conversations.

“Hey,” I replied lamely. “Eloise?”

She nodded, “Cam and Harper are playing but you’ll meet them in a bit.”

I nodded along and cemented the names into memory. It would look bad if I forgot them and kids had an ability to remember the worst things about a person. I did not want them to dislike me this quickly. Their giggles and feet were still going, and I suspected they had their own rooms on top of the little playroom in the hall.

“What do you do for work?” I asked Eloise, hoping my attempts at small talk were going over well. The other three were still chatting and I stopped paying attention long enough to be completely lost. Their dialect was different from Namjoon’s family, and I gave up entirely once they switched in and out of it with ease. 

“I’m taking over Audrey’s restaurant,” Eloise, it seemed, preferred to use their American names. I wondered if she called Jimin ‘Christian.’ I really did not like the name for him. Not at all. “We used to be co-owners but she’s preparing for…” Eloise’s eyebrows scrunched together as she struggled to come up with a way to voice her thoughts, “her next steps. You know what I mean?”

I nodded. It was so easy to forget why I was really here when Na-Yeon was so full of life. She laughed and joked easily, sang off-key in the car without a care in the world, and called the shots at home. I had hardly noticed any sickness, but I knew better. I already figured out she hated being cared for and our trip in the car could have taken a lot of her. More than I realized.

Wanting to change the subject, I asked about the kids. Eloise was more than happy to talk about her little ones. Cameron and Harper were twins, names that she had originally been very against but when she lost Tony (Haru preferred his American name, Anthony, and all of his closest friends called him Tony), her opinions changed. Harper was the bigger, older baby, while her brother needed to stay in the NICU for a few days after birth due to his weight. They were joined at the hip and rarely seen without the other, something Eloise was happy about given she was usually too busy to spend as much time with them as she would have liked.

“How old are they?” I asked.

“Almost 4.”

Jimin was 19 then. I shuddered to think about how old Haru was, or Eloise for that matter when they became parents. When I was their age, I had been at the top of my game, though not what I would call my prime. If I had gotten pregnant my career would not have been over, but meeting Joon never would have happened. That was a travesty regardless of how things turned out. Trying to picture a life without him touching it made me physically ill and so I pushed any of those thoughts away.

Cam and Harper came out of their room when dinner was ready. They were both very cute, loud, and dressed identically. Harper’s hair was braided down her back while Cam’s was in a bowl cut, and I laughed every time the little girl made a big show about her sparkly red shoes.

James made a very spicy fish stew. It was delicious, so salty and hot, but I needed multiple glasses of water as I ate. He used red snapper adding a sweet, nutty flavor to the otherwise savory dish and I loved the zucchini. Like many Korean meals there was an array of side dishes surrounding the large pot of stew. Tonight was braised potatoes, steamed eggplant, a radish salad, and, of course, kimchi. A small bowl of rice was given to all of us to eat the stew with and the rice cooker was filled if any of us wanted more. 

The Parks were a lovely family. Jimin was quiet and did not talk to me much but his mother more than made up for his silence. After getting all of the details about my coaching job she moved on to my life back in Colorado. We talked about my friends and what they were like, my house, and even my neighbors. Na-Yeon seemed particularly interested in Hoseok since Jimin had been such a fan of his growing up. 

“You need to get her over to Calvin and Violet’s,” James told his son, scraping up the last bit of the soup out of his bowl. “They’re expecting her soon.”

Jimin looked at me, eyebrow raised, “Are you ready?”

I nodded, “We can leave whenever you’re done.”

He smiled and went back to eating his meal. Eloise left before I did, Cam was tired and Harper was bored without her playmate, so she decided it was time they went home. Cam liked an afternoon nap still, but his sister could run all day if you let her. Harper gave me a big bear hug before she left, something Na-Yeon said she did to everyone, and held her brother’s hand on their way out. 

Na-Yeon eventually got up from the table, James followed after her, leaving Jimin and I alone. I did not know what to say, if he wanted me to say anything at all. He had hardly spoken to me since I arrived, and it left me feeling out of place. I was here for him, and he wanted nothing to do with me. He kept eating, the spice unfazed him, and getting bowl after bowl of rice. 

Watching him walk around I was struck by how short he was. Most male swimmers were huge, well over 6 feet, and broadly built. Not Jimin. He could not be any taller than 5’9” with a thin, tiny waist. I could see defined muscles hidden underneath his white t-shirt, but nothing spectacular. Even his body was soft and elegant, moving gracefully and quietly, and absolutely none of it would give away that he was a world-class athlete. As if he could feel my eyes following him, Jimin’s eyes snapped to meet my own.

“Sorry,” He pulled his spoon from his mouth. “I’m sure you’d like to leave and here I am gorging myself.”

I stopped him before he could stand, “No, no. I’m fine. I was just thinking about your workout routine.”

The lie felt heavy on my tongue, but I could hear how natural it sounded. He sat back down and took another bite of his food. His workout regime was standard for most swimmers. Pull-ups, bench, squat, lunge, power cleans, power cleans to overhead press. After that he was in the pool for a few hours before going about his day. He usually added in another swim at the end of the day, but he had recently given it up to have dinner with his family. 

“What are you doing for your core?” I asked.

“I stick to pull ups, crunches, thrusts, and back extensions.”

I nodded, frowning, gears in my head turning. I have always believed the core was the most important part of swimming. Arms as well, but I have seen many overwork those muscles and lose from weak turns. Hoseok used to joke about my performance and how I only won because of my turns. I would make sure he would be able to see a little bit of me in Jimin’s swimming. There was a reason I won gold.

“You don’t look very impressed.”

I chuckled, “Just thinking. You need more variety than that.”

“Gym snob, are we?” His mouth stretched into a playful smirk, and I could not help but smile back. “You must be an animal in there.”

“I don’t work out like I used to,” I admitted, averting my eyes. “Most of my exercises are yoga and running now. I swim twice a week.”

I was hoping to get back in the pool more often, but I was not sure I was ready for the disappointment that would follow. My sessions with Emery were simple, exercise-focused, and had little to no expectations behind them. They were there to help me gain strength and confidence in myself. Saturdays were spent with Hoseok doing laps around the pool and shooting the shit. It was just enough to get your heart pumping but never went past that. 

Failing was daunting. I could not remember a time before swimming consumed my life. My dad always said I was afraid of the water; it was the biggest reason he placed me in lessons. He did not have the time (nor patience) to teach me himself, and after I saw younger children getting into the pool I was determined to act like a “big girl.” I was only three at the time, so the memory was lost to time, but I went every week after that. It gave my dad a break and I had friends for the first time. I learned later that mom had left for a few months and dad was drinking again, but at the time all I knew was that I liked swimming, and I was good at it.

It was frightening to believe that all of the time, energy, and hard work went to waste. 30 seconds. That was all it took to destroy my life. 30 seconds and all of my joy, love, and happiness was gone. My career, my health, and my Joon. I hated the man who hit us. Hated the way his family cried for me. For him. For Joon. Squeeze my hands into fists, I was glad they were hidden underneath the table. Getting in the water and realizing it was truly over would only make that hatred worsen, and my therapist told me I needed to let go of my anger.

“Violet and Calvin are excited to meet you,” I did not know if Jimin could see something in his face, perhaps my eyes, but he changed the subject. The look on his face made me feel exposed. “We should get going.”

No one was around when I left so I did not get to say goodbye, but Jimin yelled that we were leaving. We did not get a response and I wondered if his mother had actually gone to do laundry or take a nap. She looked tired when she left the table. Jimin told me to get into the truck and laughed when I said I could grab my own bags. 

“Your hip might give out, granny.”

Off guard, a strange, loud noise came out of my mouth. He had yet to start up our playful banter and my heart soared. Jimin was a very cheeky man, his tongue sharp, and with a quick snapback time, he was difficult to take down. Our text exchanges were always brief and about work, but he managed to squeeze in at least one teasing comment about my age. He said calling him ‘kiddo’ is what started the whole thing.

“Just get in the truck,” He sighed melodramatically, rolling his eyes.

Huffing, I went across the lawn and got into the unlocked truck on the curb. The interior was just as refurbished as the exterior. The bench was covered in a dark green vinyl, and I could tell the rubber carpet mats were new. It smelled much better in Jimin’s truck. Less like cigarettes and more like the cologne he wore. It was floral, powdery, but with a subtle spice that made it bitter-sweet. It had a nice scent. It suited a man like Jimin whose own spice was buried underneath his pretty visage. 

Watching him jog across the yard, I suppressed a sigh. It was easier to ignore how pretty he was when we were around other people. Now it felt impossible. His clothes stuck to him like a second skin, the black leather pants (which I had only just noticed were leather) making his thighs bulge and accentuating his backside. He was gorgeous and I felt sorry that I would have to keep it to myself. Jimin deserved to be told things like that, but it was not my place to do so. Not as a coach, trainer, or otherwise.

He tossed my things into the cab of the truck as if they weighed nothing. Arms lifted; his shirt rose revealing a delicious patch of skin. Watching him in the rearview mirror, I swallowed audibly. A thin, almost nonexistent patch of hair touched his belly button. Forcing myself to look away, I took a few deep breaths.

This trip was going to be long. Very, very long. 

The drive down the road was quiet. Jimin’s radio was out, and he needed to replace it, so music was not an option, and he did not seem to want to fill the space between us. Neither did I. My growing bashfulness around him was distracting and strange. I had always been surrounded by attractive men, all of my friends back home were very good looking, but none affected me in the same way Jimin had. Perhaps it was due to my relationship with Namjoon that made all of the other men pale in comparison, but I could never know for sure. Either way, it was incredibly frustrating.

We drove for less than ten minutes. Calvin and Violet were the elderly couple renting out the small house in their backyard. Jimin had spoken to them for me, and they were all too willing to help me out. Violet nearly cried when I told her I was going to pay all of my rent up front, and actually did when I told her that I would help her fix up some things around the house while I was in town. The Andersons seemed like lovely people, and I was happy to know them.

Pulling up to the house I smiled. It was exactly how I imagined it would be. The Anderson house was a simple, All-American home with a front porch. The window trimming was black, house white, and a beautiful garden wrapped around the front at either side. The roof and front door were the same color green as Jimin’s truck, and it helped the otherwise unnoteworthy home feel more inviting. Sitting on the porch swing was Violet, her silver hair braided down her shoulder.

“Before we get out,” Jimin mumbled, waving at Violet through my window. The old woman waved back, a large smile on her face making her look twenty years younger. “The Andersons are great people, but Calvin’s starting to forget stuff. Violet won’t admit it but it’s getting hard on her to deal with him. He can become very angry so keep an ear out. Last time he had an episode, Violet called my dad crying. She’s not handling it well.”

I frowned, my heart hurting, “Sure thing. I’ll let you know if anything happens.”

“Thanks.”

He was out of the car a few seconds later, voice so sweet and bubbly you would have never guessed what we had been talking about. Staring after him, my eyes squinted. I would have to keep my eye on him. Jimin was a great actor.

Getting out of the truck, I took out my bags and slung my duffle on my back. Jimin was quick to take my suitcase away once he caught me in the corner of his eye. Violet seemed positively giddy about it and made a few inappropriate comments about Jimin needing to settle down.

“I’m just saying,” She laughed when Jimin scoffed, face flushing the prettiest shade of pink. “You’re going to make a young woman very happy. Might as well get started.”

It was strange to think about my trainee seeing someone. He had made it very clear in his interviews over the years that his dating life was on hold until he was finished swimming. He did not want the added distraction and his family life was far too chaotic for him to focus on someone. This did not seem to deter Violet and her comments about his love life, or lack thereof, continued until we got inside of the house.

“Well,” Violet acknowledged me for the first time since I arrived, “This is the main house. It’s not much but it’ll work. Christian, take her stuff out back.”

I cringed. It really did not suit Jimin at all, but he seemed completely unfazed. Violet used his names interchangeably, sometimes calling him Jimin and other times Christian, but his English name rolled off her tongue more often than not. I wondered why she even bothered calling him Jimin at all. He did not seem to care either way.

Looking around the little house, I was pleasantly surprised by how clean it all was. The floors were carpeted and the walls a bright white, family photos hung up alongside landscape paintings. During my two-hour phone call with Violet, the woman talked my ear off, she bragged about Calvin’s art. I had to admit they were all very beautiful and I wanted to know where he had found all of the slices of heaven he captured. I hoped the places themselves were more colorful than he depicted. The muted washes of color made them blend in with the rest of the boring house even with how nice they were.

The furniture was just as boring as the house itself. All of it was cream or beige, nothing of importance really stuck out to me, and I was disappointed. All I could figure out about the couple was one was an artist and they had children and grandchildren they loved displaying. Even the smell of the house lacked character. No air freshener, no food, and no perfumes. Nothing to give away that people actually lived here. The Anderson home was a foil to the Park’s in every way.

“Come on out back,” Violet was already across the house, standing in front of a door beside the kitchen. “This is the utility room. You can do your laundry here.”

Following behind her, I felt even more depressed looking at her kitchen. It was nice, new appliances and a pretty coffee station on the corner closest to the utility room door, but it was bland. All white cabinets, white marble countertops, and stainless steel everything. Even the curtains hanging around the windows above the sink were dreadfully plain.

The utility room, like everything else, was plain. The washer and dryer were white, the floor concrete, and the shelving barebones. The detergent was the most colorful thing I saw since arriving. Somehow even this room smelled like absolutely nothing. Directly across from the door we entered was the backdoor and Violet told me where they would hide a key for me to be able to get inside.

“Ready to see it?” She asked, smiling politely. 

I nodded, “Thanks again for renting it out to me.”

She chuckled, “No thanks needed. You were paying, that was enough for me to say yes.”

The back porch was tiny, just barely big enough for the both of us to stand on. There was a small vegetable garden along the side of the house, but it was empty. Noticing my wandering eyes, Violet told me all about the turnips and gourds she had been planting this season. She had watermelon and tomatoes in the summer, but they were long gone. The rest of the yard was taken up by my home for the next few months.

It was small, but that was to be expected. What disappointed me, though I should have not been very surprised, was how white it was. The windows were a dark gray, a small porch was set up with enough room for one of those hanging egg chairs, and two built-in planters. They were empty and Violet told me I was welcome to give gardening a chance if I was interested. She was planning on growing some flowers eventually, but she was not sure what she wanted.

The front door was open, Jimin already inside, and Violet and I went in. There was a small entryway, two doors leading to rooms I would explore later, and a small shoe rack. I took mine off and put them up. Violet watched me and took hers off as well.

“Audrey told me I should put one in here,” I was learning that Violet enjoyed meaningless small talk. “Glad I did. Don’t think Christian took his shoes off, though.”

I shrugged, “No biggie. I was going to clean up around here anyway.”

The house opened up to my right and I was happy with the space. I had a fully functional kitchen and enough space for my coffee cabinet along the wall. The living room would be able to fit a small loveseat, television, and coffee table. It was white and plain, but I was very happy with the floors. Whoever picked out the dark vinyl flooring must have had me in mind. I would go crazy if this place was as sterile as the Andersons’.

“I put your stuff in your room.”

Turning I grinned at Jimin. It was sweet of him to help me out. I was going to pick up my car tomorrow morning and he had volunteered to drive me. We would be starting our training next week so I could have some time to settle in. All of my furniture was arriving either tomorrow or the day after and my hands would be full. I was counting on Jimin and his friends to help me unpack. His manager was going to make himself known as well, but would not be staying for long. Apparently, according to Jimin, Sejin was not one to get his hands dirty.

“Thank you.”

“I’ll let you get settled in,” Violet was already scratching to leave, and I wondered why. She had been very hospitable over the phone. “You’re welcome to join us for dinner. Calvin is going to bring the air mattress out here tonight, so you have someplace to sleep.”

With a kiss on Jimin’s cheek, Violet slipped on her flats and left. Alone with Jimin again, I found it hard to speak. We were much better over text. Looking just as lost as I was, Jimin scratched the back of his neck and looked down. 

“My, uh, my mom offered you her couch if you want it,” He stuttered, his face turning red. “Or, uh, um, you can take the spare room at my place,” He let out a huge gust of wind. “It’s a bit of a drive but I do have the space.”

Flustered, I quickly declined, “Thanks but I’ll be fine here.”

“Oh, yeah,” Jimin shook his head, the redness spreading down his neck. “For sure. Totally.”

The air was awkward now and I could not figure out how to fix it. Jimin was the one always breaking the ice between us, and now that he was acting like this I was stranded at sea. Even when he warned me he was more reserved in person I had not expected this. He was so quiet and skittish. How was I supposed to work with him if I could not get the courage to speak?

“Thanks for the offer,” I cleared my throat. “Are you staying for dinner?”

He shook his head, “I promised Jungkook we’d go out tonight. Any other time I’d say yes.”

I asked my disappointment. The thought of spending time with Violet and Calvin alone made me deeply uncomfortable. Their house felt like a hospital room and her weird behavior was unsettling. I could only hope Calvin was nicer but from what Jimin said he was a ticking time bomb. It would be nice to have someone act as a buffer.

“Why was she acting so strangely?” I asked, hoping Jimin had picked up on it as well. “It was like a totally different person.”

He frowned, “I think she’s just on edge since Calvin went to the doctor’s today. Their daughter took him, and she hasn’t heard anything. She’s a sweet woman, don’t worry.”

Now I felt like an asshole.

“That’s understandable,” I murmured. “Do you think she’ll be upset if I order food for all of us? If she’s stressed out, I don’t want her feeling like she has to cook for me.”

Jimin smiled, “She would appreciate it. I’ll go talk to her, how does that sound?”

I nodded, grateful. “That would be nice. The house gives me the creeps.”

That made him laugh, “What? Why?”

I shrugged, giggling with him. 

“Feels like a funeral home or something. I hate the minimalist aesthetic.”

Jimin bit his lip, “You’d probably hate my place, too, then.”

I chuckled. It was easy to imagine Jimin inside of a huge modern house, dark wood and barely anything in it. He was a single man, busy, and spent so much time at his parent’s house it did not matter what he had inside of his own place. Not wanting to make him self conscious, I bit my tongue. 

“I’m sure it’s not that bad.”

He cocked his head to the side, and I laughed.

“Fine,” I conceded. “I would probably dislike it, but I don’t think it looks like a white padded cell.”

I may have been exaggerating a bit, but it was not that far off from how the Anderson home looked to me. I hoped by asking me to help fix up a few things, Violet meant giving the house a much-needed makeover. If I was lucky, I might be able to convince her to get a few throw pillows to break up the monotony.

“Jeez,” Jimin laughed. “Harsh critic.”

“Well, is it?” I joked, glad to have found our footing again.

“No,” He shook his head in thought. “It’s mostly gray and black, but still just as empty. Probably emptier, honestly. I don’t have as many pictures as Violet does.”

Smirking, he snapped his fingers, “My trophy room is pretty colorful. I have a lot of pictures and shit in there.”

That made me smile. I was not bringing any of my memorabilia here, but it was nice to hear him sound so proud of himself. I kept most of my competition stuff in my basement, a large China cabinet displaying all of my awards. My favorite had to be the small, cheaply made trophy sat at the very top. It was beside my Olympic medals, worn and dull beside the beautiful necklaces, but I loved it all the same. 

It was the first trophy I ever won. I was seven and my dad convinced me to sign up for a swimming competition my swim class was hosting. He promised to come. I practiced a lot preparing for it and made use of the new above ground pool my dad had bought. I won the race. My own joy and happiness made me forget that he never showed up until it was time to go home. I had to wait with my coach for two hours, and by the end of it she felt so bad for me she took me out for ice cream. Dad never apologized, I don’t even think he acknowledged that I won at all, and I never tried to bring it up again. Still, I loved that stupid thing. It was the reason I wanted to compete. That little pocket of happiness between winning and realizing that no one cared was precious to me and I held onto it. 

“I need to get going,” Jimin sighed, reaching into his back pocket and snapping me out of my thoughts. “Jungkook’s blowing up my phone. Just got broken up with and needs a drinking buddy.”

I sucked in air through my teeth, “Well, your services are needed. Don’t let me hold you up.”

Jimin smiled at me, “See you tomorrow, yeah?”

I nodded, “See you.”

He lingered in the entryway for a moment more before shaking out of whatever trance he had been in. Slipping his converse back on, Jimin waved at me before walking outside. His face was buried in his phone, so he never saw me wave back. He shut the door, the sound echoing in the empty house, and I was once again left alone.

Violet came out a few minutes later to discuss take out until we finally landed on pizza. She never said thank you, but her offer to give the tip since I was paying was more than enough. Then later when a few of my boxes came in early she happily carried them to me. She even helped me put everything away. When Calvin came home, she led me back inside and said with so much affection it made my heart melt.

"Calvin, this is Y/N. Sweetest woman I ever did meet. Bought us dinner."

Calvin reminded me of Namjoon in a way. His soft eyes and gentle voice. He took my hand when I introduced myself, his hands cold and soft. Wrinkles and sunspots went up the length of his arms.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," He said.

"Likewise," I replied.

We ate in silence, the three of us watching Jeopardy on the sofa. Even though I had been nervous about eating inside, Calvin's presence warmed the place up. Once a prison now felt like a poorly decorated home. A home filled with love.

As I watched them together, Calvin reaching out for Violet's hand and her giving it to him without question, I felt myself getting choked up. There had been a time I had that. Joon would be on the floor, book in his lap, while my hands were in his hair as I studied my training tapes.

I left early that night. I blew up the mattress, the house quiet, before sending out a few texts to my friends to let them know I was getting on alright. After that, I put on nature sounds to help me drift off to sleep. I had not felt this lonely in a very long time.

Taglist: @ownthesunshine @screamertannie @lovelytaes-blog @pernesianparapio

© chimcess, 2024. Do not copy or repost without permission.

#park jimin fanfic #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin #bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #jimin x y/n #jimin x reader #jimin x you #bts x y/n #bts x you #bts x reader #bts smut #jimin smut #bts angst #jimin angst #bts fluff #jimin fluff #jimin fanfic #bts x fem!reader #jeon jungkook #jung hoseok #kim namjoon #kim taehyung #kim seokjin #min yoongi #older reader

[kingofbodyrolls]

My Heart's Home (m) | pjm | series masterlist

“It will take some time To find your heart And come back home You could walk for miles Cross every river And find your not alone ‘Cos I'll be there” - From McLeod’s Daughters theme song

🐴 Summary: You’d never thought you’d step foot back at the ranch– a place you used to call home a long time ago. When you are forced to go back, reconcile with your sister and a certain childhood friend that you had long forgotten, will sparks reunite? 🐴 Pairing: jimin x reader (main), jungkook x reader (only happens once in the first chapter), jungkook x OC (jessi), namjoon x OC (jessi), yoongi x hoseok, namjoon x oc, seokjin x oc, taehyung x oc 🐴 Characters: female reader (she’s more like an OC, but isn’t mentioned by name and no “y/n”), Jimin, Jungkook, Namjoon, Yoongi, Hoseok, Seokjin, Taehyung and four female original characters. 🐴 AUs: ranch!au, slice of life!au. childhood friends to lovers! 🐴 Genres: smut, humor, fluff, slow burn and angst (yes, it’s got everything lol!) 🐴 Rating: mature/explicit/R18 – this is mature/explicit content, so minors, please do not interact! 🐴 Word count: TBA (approx. 180k) 🐴Disclaimer: I do not own BTS or know them personally and this work of fiction is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only. The actions and personalities described in the story do not reflect those of BTS— it’s just fiction. Also, if you would kindly read the tags/warnings before reading, that would be lovely: and if you don’t like whatever is described in the tags, just hit return and find something else to read. Thank you 🌸 🐴 Warnings/tag: will be tagged for each individual chapter. But it does contain sexual themes, smut and a lot of sexual tension and a hell of a lot of angst! Like series is an emotional rollercoaster ride, it will leave you both happy, sad, frustrated, mad, angry and oh so in love. All through the series. You have been warned, lol. 🐴 Status: ongoing! 2 chapters a week. (to be completed on 2nd May 2024) 🐴 Fancy reading on AO3? It is cross-posted there! 🐴 Do you want to see the book cover (there's a teaser too)? [it's here]

🐴 Author’s note: this series is heavily inspired by the TV show McLeod’s Daughters. Some plot points will feel familiar, while others won’t (because I don’t follow that story structure to a tee). But If you love that show that I do, I’m 100% sure you’ll love this story too! Also, I don’t expect people to really be interested in this… this is more of a story about coming home, finding home, finding love and such… and I don’t know if you want to read that sort of thing? But I fucking love it! ✨

Chapter #1 - Inheritance | word count: 8.2k | read → chapter one

Chapter #2 - It’s a Long Road | word count: 9.1k | read → chapter two

Chapter #3 - Sometimes | word count: 11.8k | read → chapter three

Chapter #4 - It Comes to This | word count: 7.5k | read → chapter four

Chapter #5 - Our Home, Our Place | word count: 11k | read → chapter five

Chapter #6 - Wild Horses | word count: 11k | read → chapter six

Chapter #7 - We Got it Wrong | word count: 9.5k | read → chapter seven

Chapter #8 - Love You, Hate You | word count: 9.5k | read → chapter eight

Chapter #9 - Take the Rain Away | word count: 8.2k | read → chapter nine

Chapter #10 - The First Touch | word count: 16.4k | read → chapter ten

Chapter #11 - This Perfect Day | word count: 14.4k | read → chapter eleven

Chapter #12 - Broken Dreams | word count: 14.4k | read → chapter twelve

Chapter #13 - Love Letter | word count: 13.4k | read → chapter thirteen

Chapter #14 - I Wish the Past was Different | word count: 10.5k | read → chapter fourteen

Chapter #15 - Did I Tell You? | word count: 13.7k | read → chapter fifteen

Chapter #16 - The Stranger | word count: 14.1k | read → chapter sixteen

Chapter #17 - Love of Your Life | word count: 13.3k | read → chapter seventeen

Chapter #18 - By My Side | word count: 14.7k | read → chapter eighteen

Chapter #19 - Home | word count: TBA | read → chapter nineteen

Chapter #20 - My Heart's Home [Epilogue + Q&A] | word count: TBA | read → chapter twenty

Please let me know if you're excited for this??? I'm still writing it, and honestly... I love it! But it's tough to write such a long series without any feedback or knowledge whether it's good or sucks... so.. yeah....

#jimin x reader #jimin fic #jimin smut #jimin imagine #jimin fanfic #bts smut #bts fanfic #bts x reader #bts fic #jimin x you #park jimin imagine #park jimin x you #park jimin x reader #park jimin smut #jungkook smut #jungkook x reader #bangtan x reader #bangtan smut #bangtan fanfic #bangtan fic #park jimin #jimin fanfiction #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin fanfic #bts jimin fanfic #my heart's home series #bts #jimin scenario #bangtan x you #pjm x you

[oddinary4bts]

I want to be with you | pjm

☆summary : moving to Seoul has always seemed like a good idea, until the bubble bursts when you realize your new neighbor is Park Jimin, and he's not the sweet angel you've always imagined him to be. Will the reality of Park Jimin forever be a nightmare, or will he turn into a sweet dream?

☆pairing: Park Jimin x female reader

☆rating: 18+

☆genre: strangers (fan) to friends to lovers, idol!au; fluff, some slight angst, smut

☆warnings: cheating ex, mention of a parent dying, asshole jimin for a few moments, a tiny little bit of jealousy, alcohol consumption, throwing up (jimin and reader both be messy but they have other qualities I swear), explicit stuff: oral sex (female receiving), edging, fingering, badly written dirty talk, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it babes), slightly dom! jimin, a little bit of spanking??, reader is shy and awkward and might give you a little bit of secondhand embarrassment, sad love confession

☆word count: 32.5k words (the funny thing is I edited to take out some stuff and ended up having a longer word count lmao)

☆a/n: Wow, I am so excited to finally share this with you. Before you read, I just want to warn you that English is not my first language, and I also have slight dyslexia. So, if there are any typos, feel free to tell me so I can edit them out! I hope you will all enjoy <3 (I have read it so many times that I hate it now but, yeahhh hopefully it doesn’t suck). Also, I usually exclusively write badass characters, and I tried to make the reader a softie sooo sorry if I failed hahahaha

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

1 month ago

               Moving days had always been excruciating to you. Long and exhausting, and you’d always dread the moment you’d have to drag all the boxes up to your new living place. Even more so today, as you were finally moving to Seoul, after months of planning the whole ordeal.

Seoul had been a dream to you, ever since you had been little. It was hard to figure out why – maybe it was the culture, or the clash South Korea was to your home country. To get out of your comfort zone and just step into a whole new world… it had been an exciting promise, really.

Or maybe home had just never really felt like home.

Yet there was something bittersweet, about Seoul. You had visited twice, in the past – the first time just on a trip, and the second when you had roamed around the city in search of a place to move to last February. Your mother had recommended this apartment, in a posh building that had seemed just a little overpriced for you. You had fallen in love with it, the moment you had seen the view from the spacious living room. You had known you had found a home for yourself as the Seoul skyline had come into view, bathed in the glow of the setting sun.

It had been a future home for you and your ex, and maybe that was really the cause of the bittersweet feeling Seoul brought to you. Indeed, you had been supposed to move here with Collin, but he had decided to stay back, and to not follow you in your dreams. You hadn’t been selfish enough to beg him to come – God knew Collin had his own dreams back home. To build a home, get married and have a plethora of children to fill the empty rooms of his home with laughter and joy.

Something you had never really wanted for yourself. So, you had parted ways, a month before you were set to leave, and you had spent that month putting everything in order, selling the stuff you couldn’t bring along. It had made you feel as if the old you was dead, and you were leaving her behind, in the cemetery that was your hometown.

Not a place you thought one would want to raise children in.

You hmphed as you balanced a large box on your hip, eyes scanning the hall of your building as you walked towards the elevator. You didn’t know what the box was filled with, and you couldn’t help but curse yourself mentally. Heavy boxes were a danger to one’s back, and you were already straining from the effort of holding onto it. But maybe that was because you had been a little greedy, adding a smaller cardboard container above that big one. The small box stood precariously on top – goddamn, had you put books in there? – and you eyed it from the corner of your eyes as you neared the elevator of the complex your new apartment was in. The smaller box started to slip, and you quickly put a hand on top of it to keep it from crashing to the ground.

You doubted it held something fragile, but you still didn’t want to risk breaking something.

Moving days were a pain in the ass indeed. Especially considering that your family hadn’t been able to travel to South Korea to help you move. It was you, all alone, and you had already done so many trips in the elevator that you knew it by heart now – from the fingerprints that someone had left behind on the inside of the door to the coffee stain on the carpet of it.

Or so you hoped it was a coffee stain.

The keys that you held in your hand under the box jingled as you reached forward, heavy box threatening to slip out of your reach, index finger pointed towards the button to call the elevator.

You sighed in relief as the sign over said elevator lit up, indicating that your little maneuver had been a success. You straightened, and a bead of sweat formed on your brow. The box really was too heavy. 

You watched the number over the elevator change as it came up from the basement, before stopping on the ground level, doors sliding open.

Sometimes, you wondered if faith existed. If there was a bigger plan to the universe, something written for you already that you couldn’t really escape from. It was the thought that crossed your mind as the doors finished moving, and a dark-haired boy – man – stared at you as you just stood there, mouth falling open.

See, there were a few things you liked about Korea. K-pop being one of those. And you had been a BTS fan for a long time now, part of the army that was their fanbase, and maybe that had contributed to your will to move to Seoul.

Actually, you fully knew it was one of the reasons.

But, nothing had prepared you for this moment. The moment an idol appeared in front of you, as if conjured by your deepest most secret desires. An angel, standing in the elevator, black hood on along with a matching mask.

It was the eyes though, that you recognized. You had spent so many hours looking at pictures of those eyes – really, you had never seen eyes such as his. And that gaze was now boring into yours, as if peering right to your soul, and you found you couldn’t quite move.

And who were you to blame, Park Jimin had always been your bias. Had been the reason why you had gotten into K-pop in the first place.

Jimin’s eyes skimmed over your figure for a moment, gaze landing on your keys.

On the goddamn Chimmy keychain that dangled from your hand, bright yellow that could have caught anyone’s eyes.

When his gaze moved back up to your face, you gulped, feeling very naked. Not that you were naked at all, but to have your bias standing in front of you like that… it rendered you completely unable to process what was happening.

“Are you getting in?” he asked in English, and there was a strain to his voice. As if it was threatening to fall into annoyance, but he didn’t want to let it go there just yet.

Your cheeks flushed bright red as your gaze dropped to the floor, embarrassment winning the war against your will to gaze at him until your eyes would fall out of your head.

You nodded, and you took two steps forward. Two steps were all that it took for you to step into the same elevator as Park Jimin. And it was surreal. He had always been just a picture or a video on the other side of a screen, except that one time you had gone to a concert. But right now, he was standing next to you, hands in the pockets of his black hoodie, eyes staring straight ahead. As if not even wanting to acknowledge your presence.

You stood awkwardly, arm starting to shake from the weight of the boxes. You glanced at the floor levels, and your eyes slightly widened as you noticed your floor was already lit up.

Was Park Jimin really your neighbor?

The elevator shot up, and the first acceleration had your arm straining to keep holding the box up, gravity threatening to win against your weak muscles.

You let go of the smaller container on top, using your chin to hold it in place as your other arm joined the one holding the whole thing. Your muscles sighed in relief, though you knew it would be short-lived.

You maybe should have worked out more when you were back home.

The metal jail in which you were encased was silent, apart from the humming it emitted as it moved up. And it really did feel like a jail, with the cold atmosphere that radiated from the man next to you. It was hard to ignore the harsh look on the small part of his features you could see, but you did your best not to look at him, as your prison passed all the floors until it finally reached the very top. The floor where only two apartments stood, on each side of the hallway, and really, how in hell could Park Jimin be your neighbor?

Your arms – plural this time – started shaking again as the elevator came to a halt, and it seemed like it took a small eternity before the doors slid open. Feeling the need to get away from Jimin, and from the ice you really didn’t want to acknowledge surrounding him, you quickly stepped out, moving towards your door. And maybe it was the rush in your steps, and the fact that your arms really were losing the fight against gravity, but the boxes seemed suddenly twice as heavy. Clutching to them proved to be useless, and the top container slid, wrecking the balance of the lower box at the same time.

You cursed as the two boxes fell to the carpeted floor, the cardboard of the larger one bending until a part of it ripped, revealing its precious treasure.

Your collection of BTS albums spilled from it, as if they were liquid, and your cheeks turned even darker as you immediately bent down, moving to pick them up before Jimin could see. A stupid thing to do, because he was standing right behind you, and the mess you had made took almost half of the hallway’s width.

With shaky hands, you tried putting the albums back into the box they had escaped from, but it only made it rip further. You stopped moving altogether as a pair of jeans-clothed legs stepped over the mess, and your eyes moved up, heart beating out of your chest.

Jimin didn’t once look in your direction as he moved towards his door – right in front of yours – putting in the code to unlock it. As the lock came undone, electronic whirring filling the awkward silence, he finally deigned to glance your way.

A hard look painted his features, and the judgment in his eyes slapped you across the face as your eyes met for a short moment. He seemed … somehow disgusted by you, as if the fact that you were Army made him want to get away from you as soon as he could. And you understood it, to a certain extent. He was famous after all, and he probably had had his share of crazy fans in the past.

That didn’t stop your heart from feeling as if it was being crushed in your chest, as if his fist had closed around it and he was about to rip it from your ribcage.

Jimin looked away as the lock finally finished moving, opening his door in a swift motion before stepping inside, not once looking back at you, kneeling there in the middle of the hallway.

When he disappeared from view, you let out a shuddering breath, your gaze falling back to the mess on the floor. You wondered when your vision had turned blurry, and it took you a moment to realize there were tears in your eyes.

You doubted you had ever felt as embarrassed as you were feeling right now.

You blinked the tears away, putting the albums in a neat pile before picking them up. It really did seem like gravity wanted to win the whole war, because the pile threatened to scatter to the ground again, but you managed to make it to your door without another accident. You had left it unlocked, and you pushed the door open with your shoulder, leaving the pile next to the wardrobe. You then went back into the hallway to gather the small container and the cardboard remnants of the traitorous box that had dared spill your secrets at the worst moment possible.

Well, the Chimmy keychain had been a traitor in and of itself too.

You moved into your apartment, kicking your shoes off by the door to put slippers on. You didn’t even look at the albums once, not wanting to deal with the shame that they still held and promised to be holding on to for a while. You left the small box and your keys on the island of the kitchen, which was the first room of the apartment, before tearing the broken package into smaller pieces you could fit in your recycling bin. You then moved through the space that was now yours, until you reached the living room, and the wide glass windows on the wall showed that same setting sun you had fallen in love with the first time you had come here.

You plopped yourself down on the black leather couch, sighing deeply as you ran a hand on your face, trying to shake the embarrassment away. And even if you knew it was early morning back home, you grabbed your phone, calling your mom on Facetime without an ounce of hesitation.

You looked at yourself on the phone screen for a time, as your living room filled ringing, until your mom finally picked up. From what you could see of her surroundings, she was on set.

“Hi sweetie”, the gentle voice of your mother said through the speakers of the phone. “How was moving day?”

“Mom, why did you recommend this apartment building again?” you asked, ignoring your mother’s question. “You did not tell me BTS would be my neighbors.”

Your mother didn’t reply as she moved away from the lights of the set, clearly searching for a calmer environment so you could speak privately. You glanced away from your phone, eyes once again sliding to the setting sun outside the windows.            

“I didn’t know that BTS lived in that complex”, your mother finally replied as she seemed to find a place she judged calm enough. “I just knew it had the reputation to be very safe and private, and with your dad and I being who we are, I just figured it be best for you.”

Here’s to having a famous mother and an extremely filthy rich dad.

“Park Jimin lives next door.” You put a hand over your face as your cheeks burned red. “Mom, he seemed so disgusted when he saw my merch.”

“He helped you move?”

You shook your head, hand falling back into your lap. “No, I dropped a box in front of him and all my albums came out of it. He just scowled at it before going to his place.”

The smile that had first lit up your mother’s face slowly dwindled away. If someone knew how obsessed with Park Jimin you had once been, it was her.

“Oh”, she let out. “Maybe he was just surprised.”

“No, mom, I swear.” You gulped. “He was disgusted.”

Your mother chuckled lightly. “I’m sure you’re making it seem worse than it was. Besides, you met Park Jimin!”

The last sentence was said on a giddy tone, but it didn’t reach you at all. No, it just made you feel worse.

“Mom, I didn’t even say a word to him, I was way too shy.”

“My daughter, shy?” Your mother shook her head, even though you were very much so a shy person. “Again, I’m sure it wasn’t as bad as you’re saying.”

You sighed loudly, nibbling at the dry skin of your bottom lip. “Well, it was.”

 “Sarah, we need you on set”, a voice said in the distance on the other side of the line, barely even audible to you. You watched as your mother looked away from her phone, and it took a few seconds before her eyes trailed back to it.

“Listen, sweetie, I have to go. But why don’t you go introduce yourself properly to him? After all, you’re neighbors.”

“Mom what? I’m not in one of your movies, I won’t do that.”

Sarah pursed her lips, before once again glancing away from the phone. “Well then, have you finished moving already?”

You shook your head no. “I still have a few boxes to move up.”

“You should have hired a moving company to help you”, your mother said reproachfully.

“Shipping everything here was already expensive enough”, you pointed out. “It’s fine, I’m almost done.”

“Alright sweetie.” There was a silence as a soft smile slowly spread on your mother’s lips. “I can’t wait to come visit you after we wrap up this movie.”

“I can’t wait either”, you replied, and you swallowed down the lump that had threatened to form in your throat. “It’s going to be weird to live in a city where I know no one.”

“All the more reasons to go introduce yourself to Park Jimin”, your mom said teasingly, winking at you.

“Mom, no!” Though this time you did let out a small laugh.

The smile on your mother’s lips turned into a fond one. “I love you, sweetie. Take care of you.”

“Will do, mom, I love you too.”

You hung up, and your eyes trailed back to the windows. The sun had disappeared under the horizon, the light turning blue as dusk settled over the city. With a sigh, you pushed yourself up.

After all, you still had boxes to move.

***

 Present day

                The screaming of children had you wincing in pain, a headache threatening to win over your senses. Especially as the screaming melted into crying, and a teary-eyed and red-faced child stopped in front of you, tugging on your hand so you’d look down.

Your first week as an elementary school teacher had proven to be a complete disaster. At least you had just taught a few classes the whole week – as the English teacher, you didn’t have a full schedule. But goddamn couldn’t you wait until the day was over and you’d be sipping wine back home.

It had taken you a few days to finish moving in, after that embarrassing first day. And it had taken you only a few more days to realize just how much of an asshole Park Jimin was. How much of an even worse neighbor he was.

Really, he had woken you up in the middle of the night more than once with loud music, and sometimes when you got out of your own place, you had to refrain from gagging at the smell of the trash he left just outside of his door.

You had even brought it down once because you were afraid liquid would seep through the plastic bag and stain the carpet of the hallway. Of course Jimin hadn’t thanked you for it. Indeed, he usually pretended that you didn’t exist, barely even looking your way when you moved passed each other in the hallway in front of your homes. And when he did look at you, it was always with that same condescending and arrogant look on his face, as if he thought himself to be so much better than you.

A month ago, you might have said that he was, but now that you knew who he really was, you knew that he was rotten to the core.

Well, you maybe were being too harsh on him. Ignoring you didn’t really make him an asshole, but you had a hard time dealing with the loud music at night, especially considering it happened at least four times a week.

One would have thought that the walls of the complex would have been sound-proofed better than they actually were, but no, when he had his music on it pretty much felt as if you were standing right in the middle of his apartment.

“Teacher Y/l/n”, the child said through her sobs, and you snapped back to the present, bending down to be at a level with the child.

“What is going on?” you asked, voice as gentle as you could manage to make it through the storm of children raging around you.

The little girl mumbled something that you didn’t quite understand. Your Korean wasn’t perfect yet, and you had found that children often chewed on their syllables in a way that left you grasping for comprehension. And though you were an English teacher, you knew that most of the kids didn’t speak enough of the language to be able to talk to you. So, you always did your best with your Korean, but you knew you’d need a few weeks to adjust.

“Why don’t we go sit over there?” you said in reply, pointing to where bean bags were arranged in a circle, with a few plush toys scattered around them. “Then you can explain to me.”

You should have known better than to put all of your attention on the same kid, because by the time you had sat the little girl and handed her a teddy bear, the sound of glass breaking had you spin your head around.

A guilty round-faced boy came into view, as he looked down at the glass surrounding him. You wanted to curse loudly, but you forced yourself to smile before moving towards him.

You helped the boy to move away from the glass, as the other students looked at you curiously, all of them a little startled from the accident. It led to the room falling silent for the first time in what seemed hours, and you breathed a sigh of relief as you cleaned the mess up.

Maybe you never should have let the children have a free period, but you had felt generous as it was the last period of the week. A mistake you weren’t going to repeat.

In the relative calmness that followed the storm, you were able to have the children sit in the bean bags, along with the little girl whose sadness seemed to be long forgotten as she played with her teddy bear. You read a story to them, in English of course, until the class finally ended and their main teacher came to gather the children. The older lady would bring them back to their own class, where they’d get their school bags before their parents came to pick them up.

You were cleaning the mess left in the classroom when your colleague Chaeyoung appeared in the doorway, a tired smile on her lips.

“How was the first week?” she asked, as you straightened from where you had been kneeling on the floor, picking up the plush toys so you could put them back in the box where you had first taken them.

“The first years were a challenge to end the week with, but other than that it was great”, you replied, though your voice was filled with exhaustion.

Chaeyoung chuckled, nodding her head knowingly. “As cute as they are, they really are a challenge.”

You couldn’t agree more.

“Anyway, I was here to tell you that some of the other teachers are going to get drinks, if you want to join”, Chaeyoung said.

Thinking about going out with people you had known for just a few days made you feel even more tired inside, but you found you didn’t really have it in you to say no. After all, you had been pretty much alone for a month now, except for the week your mother had come to visit you. You needed a little socialization, especially if you wanted to make friends here.

“Sure, I’ll come”, you agreed, and the smile that lit up Chaeyoung’s face was entirely worth it.

Chaeyoung probably was the colleague that was the closest in age to you, and she also was the one who had tried making you feel the most welcomed ever since you had started working there. The friendliness with which the girl carried herself really made her easily approachable, and you knew you’d be good friends in no time.

Chaeyoung also was the only one that hadn’t acted as if the fact that your mother was a famous actress was a big deal. It had made you appreciate the girl even more.

Later that evening, after drinks, which had mostly been eating more than drinking, you found yourself in a cab on the way back home. The school for which you worked was fairly close to where you lived, but your colleagues had insisted on going to a bar that was farther away, enough for you to dread the walk home. So, getting a cab it had been, and you looked at Seoul’s streets as the car made its way towards your apartment complex.

The radio was on, volume tuned down as the driver hadn’t turned it back up after having asked you where you lived. Yet, the volume was high enough for you to recognize the BTS song that was playing, and you almost felt like rolling your eyes to the back of your head.

Though you refrained from doing so, because it didn’t sit right with you to start hating the whole group just because Jimin was an arrogant piece of shit. Instead, you bobbed along to the music, mouthing the lyrics, as your condominium finally came into view.

You paid the cab as it stopped in front of the building, thanking the driver before getting out and walking the short distance to the gate, and then to the doors proper. You walked in, the bright hall and its high ceilings a stark contrast with the darkness outside, though you barely acknowledged it as you made your way to the elevator.

Mind a little fuzzed up by the alcohol, you called for the elevator, waiting in front of the doors patiently. You grabbed your phone in the tote bag on your shoulder, opening your text messages to reply to the text Chaeyoung had sent you, before switching apps to Instagram, scrolling through it mindlessly.

It took you a few seconds to realize that the elevator was still in the basement. What was taking so long?

The basement held a parking lot, and a wide gym you had visited a couple of times so far, though you had never really been an athletic person. You had been surprised at the amount of famous people you had seen there though, but luckily enough you hadn’t run into Jimin once.

You wondered if he would have looked even more disgusted by the sight of you sweating.

Putting your phone back where you had taken it, you made to move away, deciding that you’d take the stairs instead of the elevator since it really didn’t seem like it was coming. As you were about to take the first step away, you heard it start moving, and you turned back towards it, sighing in relief. You really hadn’t felt like climbing up the nine floors.

Nothing could have really prepared you to the sight that fell upon your eyes when the doors slid open. It was almost a parallel to that first time you had seen Jimin there, though this time Jimin had an arm thrown around the shoulders of Jeong Hoseok, and he was clearly drunk out of his mind.

You stepped in, bowing to Hoseok as your eyes slid to Jimin, and to the not-so subtle stain on the front of his shirt.

From the smell of it, you were pretty sure Jimin had thrown up on himself. And really, the sour stench made you scrunch up your nose in disgust, right as Hoseok apologized for it.

“Oh”, you let out. “It’s okay.”

At the sound of your voice, Jimin opened his eyes, glassy gaze moving to find yours. You expected his features to have that same disgusted scowl he always reserved for you, but his brows fell, as if he was ashamed, or perhaps sad.

It was so human you found you had to look away.

“I didn’t know you speak Korean”, Jimin mumbled, speech definitely slurred by the alcohol.

You froze, not expecting him to talk to you directly, until your gaze slid to him again.

He was still looking at you, but his face was unreadable. Until a lazy smile broke on his lips as he turned towards Hoseok, who had his arm wrapped around Jimin’s waist to keep him up.

 “She’s the new neighbor I told you about”, Jimin said, and Hoseok glanced at you.

Jimin had talked about you?

The elevator slowed down as it reached your floor, the deceleration making Jimin stumble forward. Hoseok held onto him, and Jimin once again looked at you.

“Where is your boyfriend?”

The doors slid open as you just looked back at him, feeling completely dumbfounded. What the hell was he talking about?

You remained silent, as Hoseok tried making Jimin walk out of the elevator, but the man stayed stubbornly in place. “Wait, hyung.”

You didn’t wait, walking around Jimin and Hoseok to get out, moving towards your door as your cheeks burned red. You felt way too embarrassed to stay there. 

What boyfriend was Jimin talking about?

Jimin followed you, though he would have probably fallen right to the floor had Hoseok not been there. Yet, the two men were slower, and your pace turned even faster as you headed for your home.

“See, that’s what I said, she doesn’t speak”, Jimin continued, and he let out a bitter chuckle. “Army fucking hates us now.”

“Jimin-ah, let’s just get you to bed”, Hoseok gently said, mouthing an apology to you as you turned back to look at them.              

Why the hell would Jimin think that Army hated BTS?

“I just fucking hate this”, Jimin spat, pushing Hoseok away.

Your eyes widened, and you quickly moved towards your door, mind still not processing what was going on. Not wanting to witness Jimin in that state either. And as you were pressing in the code to unlock the door, the unmistakable sound of someone retching had you glancing back towards Hoseok and Jimin.

Jimin was folded in half, hand on the wall to keep standing as he was throwing up, right on the carpet of the hallway. The sound made you shiver, but luckily enough you weren’t one to get sick when someone else was.

No, you had always been the mom friend in the friend groups you had had back home. Except when you happened to be the one to black out, as it usually came before throwing up for you.

“I am so sorry about this”, Hoseok apologized once again, right as he stood there, seemingly not knowing what to do anymore.

Indeed, his face had gone a shade paler, and you wondered if he was about to be sick too.

“What’s wrong with him?” you asked, unable to keep the venom from seeping into your words.

No, you rather had a lot of accumulated rage against Jimin, and seeing him like that just made you even angrier. And you didn’t know what your question really was about. It almost was rhetorical – you knew he was drunk – but maybe your mind had gone to the behaviour that had been his since you had met him.

“He drank too much.”

Obviously.

You nodded slowly, nose scrunching up in disgust as the stench reached you. Jimin retched a little more, and you looked away, feeling a little dizzy yourself. You only looked back towards them once Jimin had straightened up.

He was looking at you already when your eyes met his, and you watched as a tear rolled down his cheek, one that he dried angrily before wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Fuck”, he let out and your lips stretched into a thin line at the unexpected curse.

“Let’s get you home”, Hoseok said, glancing between Jimin and you. He then added, fixating his eyes on you, “I’ll come back to clean.”

“I can take care of it. Just get him in bed and make sure he drinks some water.”

“I don’t need you to take care of me, you know”, Jimin mumbled, and you weren’t quite sure if the words were directed at you or at Hoseok.

It didn’t really matter though, because Hoseok thanked you, grabbing Jimin by the wrist and pulling him to his door. He pressed in the code, thanking you once again before pulling Jimin inside.

“You know”, Jimin said as he resisted following his friend. “I don’t even know her name.”

Hoseok had a stern voice as he replied, “Jimin-ah, just get in.”

You watched as the door shut behind the two young men, and then your eyes slid to the mess Jimin had caused. You shivered in disgust, not really wanting to be the one to clean that. But you had said you would, so you got into your apartment, moving to find the cleaning supplies you’d need to wash it all, and to make sure it didn’t stain the carpet.

What the hell was wrong with Park Jimin?

You walked back out, aiming for the puddle of vomit that was slowly seeping into the carpet. The smell was enough to make you gag, as you put on gloves and started picking up as much as you could to put it in the plastic bag.

It wasn’t so different than cleaning up after a kid had retched, and you did everything in you not to think about the fact that Park Jimin had been the source of that mess. That you had seen him at a low point, and that he, for one, hadn’t seemed to hate you.

No, he had just looked terribly sad.

Your thoughts traveled back to the words he had uttered, skimming over the fact that he had mentioned you having a boyfriend. Stopping on that fact, in all truth. Had a boy come over to her place while you were gone for him to think that? You doubted it – no stranger could have gone past the security downstairs.

What had he meant, then?

You sighed as you finished picking up most of what hadn’t yet seeped in the carpet, before moving to actually cleaning the whole thing, eyes watering a little from the small gags you weren’t able to keep in.

 Also, Jimin had mentioned Army hating them. You assumed he had meant BTS, but why the hell would he think that Army hated BTS now? Maybe it was because you had indulged into alcohol a little too, but it took a moment for your brain to formulate an answer.

The hiatus, or whatever that break could really be called. The video had come out a few weeks ago, a couple of days after you had moved in… Did Jimin really think that Army hated them for that?

You scoffed, because really he was annoying and you couldn’t help yourself. Even as you were starting to understand him, to understand the human being behind the idol, though you didn’t really know him all that much yet. One thing was for sure: understanding him didn’t justify his actions, especially considering you had never done anything to piss him off.

Unless the fact that you were Army was enough to piss him off indeed. Which came as a surprise to you, because Jimin had the reputation to be easy of approach. Clearly, people had been wrong about him, or it really was just you he hated.

It made you stop cleaning the mess, as the thought slowly formed in your head, rendering you far too sad to be cleaning.

The door to Jimin’s apartment opened, and you turned your head towards it, half-expecting Jimin to step out and be the arrogant prick you had gotten to know in the last few weeks. Instead, Hoseok stepped out, and he pressed his lips into a thin line as your eyes met.

“You really didn’t have to clean, I could have taken care of it”, he said, eyes looking over his shoulder as he shut the door behind him gently.

You sat back on your heels, glancing at the wet spot on the carpet. “It’s okay, it’s not all different from cleaning after the kids I teach to.”

Hoseok had a friendly smile playing on his lips when you looked back at him.

Looking the perfect picture of the person he projected in videos and pictures. Being exactly what you had first expected Jimin to be like.

“Well, it’s very nice of you”, he added. His gaze trailed to the plastic bag next to you. “I’ll bring that in the trash downstairs.”

The corner of your lips spread into a hesitant smile. “Thank you.”

He shrugged his shoulders, before once again glancing at Jimin’s door. “I’m sorry about him, by the way.”

You wet your lips, your eyes once again going to the mess. Or rather to what was left of it. “What’s wrong with him?” you reiterated your previous question, finding you didn’t have the courage to look at Hoseok for his reply.

Though he remained silent for a moment, and you wondered if he was debating telling you the truth. And maybe he only chose to be honest because you were currently cleaning his friend’s mess, something you really didn’t have to do after all.

“He’s been having a couple of rough weeks”, Hoseok admitted, then added quickly as if afraid you’d think Jimin was indulging a little too much, “The alcohol doesn’t really have something to do with it though.”

You found you couldn’t stop the bitter chuckle that fell from your lips. It was a small awkward sound, and you wondered if Hoseok could see you blushing.

For god’s sake, were you actually talking to Hobi?

Hoseok seemed taken aback by your chuckle, maybe not expecting it from someone Jimin had said to be Army. He buried his hands in his pockets, rocking on his feet a little, as if he too was feeling a little awkward.

“I’m sorry he’s not been doing great”, you eventually chose to say, as the silence had started stretching to the point of discomfort. “I…” you trailed off, not really knowing what to add.

“Oh, he’ll get over it soon”, Hoseok said, the certainty in his voice so clear it made you want to believe it.

Yet a part of you wasn’t able to believe it at all.

“I hope so”, you muttered, more to yourself than to him.

Because perhaps normal Park Jimin wouldn’t be such a shit neighbor.

There was another silence, during which you busied yourself by finishing cleaning up, before throwing away everything in the plastic bag and tying it up. You pushed up to your feet, fully conscious that Hoseok was watching you carefully, as if expecting you to say more. And though he was a lot easier to talk to than your neighbor, you had nothing else to say about Jimin.

You exchanged an awkward look, and you scraped your throat, gaze dropping to the floor. “I… really like your new song”, you finally said. “The grunge vibe is really great.”

Hoseok was beaming once you met his gaze again. “See, I told him you didn’t hate us.”

You blushed a little. “Oh?”

“Well.” He chuckled, shrugging his shoulders. “He mentioned you are a fan, and all.”

“He thinks I hate you?” There was genuine surprise in your voice.

“He is convinced Army in general does, yeah.”

There was another silence, one that felt quite a lot heavier.

“He is not taking that whole break thing well, is he?”

Hoseok’s face fell serious, his eyes unreadable. “He’s the one that’s taking it the hardest, let’s say.”

So, you had been right about it. And that small part of you that didn’t already dislike Jimin seemed to swell a little, pushing the negative emotions back.

“I’m sorry”, you said, unsure what you were apologizing for, and the negative emotions swerved back in.

You were sorry for what, exactly? For being Army, and the very cause of Jimin’s guilt? Or for not really feeling sorry for him at all? Because even if you knew that he was not doing great, most of you was still angered at the thought of him. At the perspective that he’d wake you up in the middle of the night again in the next few days, and that he’d look down on you like you were just a mere speck of dust.

Feeling guilty for taking a break didn’t really give him the right to be an asshole. And maybe you were a bad person for being unable to really feel bad for him, but at least you were honest to yourself about it.

Hoseok didn’t really speak to you much after that, as if sensing your discomfort. He instead wished you good night, grabbing the plastic bag from where you had left it. You didn’t move back to your apartment right away, eyes lost in a vague spot on the wall, and Hoseok’s voice had you looking towards where he was standing, waiting for the elevator to come.

“Don’t be too harsh on him”, he said. “And don’t take it personally, if he’s acting weird around you.”

Your pursed your lips. “Easier said than done.”

“I know…” Hoseok looked down at his feet, laughing lightly. “I know”, he repeated. “He’ll come around.”

“What makes you so sure of it?” you asked.

He had a knowing smile on his lips when he gazed back at you, right as the elevator dinged behind him. “Because he asked for your name until he passed out in his bed.”

 ***

               The summer air was heavy with humidity as you walked back to your apartment, grocery bags in hand. The dark clouds up ahead promised of rainfall and storm, though for now the cement of the road was completely dry, and it almost still seemed as if it was fuming with heat, creating a mirage in the distance like one would see in the desert. Cars drove slowly in the street, as if their tires were melting, sticking to the ground and keeping them from moving at their normal pace, and really, the heat felt as if it was pressing down on everyone and everything. The worst part was that it only seemed to be getting worse by the second.

You couldn’t wait for the rain to fall, releasing the atmosphere of the heaviness that clung to it. You just hoped you’d be back home by then.

You hurried, because you didn’t really want to risk being stuck in the rain, but it seemed the universe had other plans for you. The clouds opened up as you could see your condominium in the distance, showering you so thoroughly that by the time you reached the door, you were drenched from your toes to the top of your head.

Maybe you should have gone to the grocery store in the complex. But you had been avoiding it since the end of last week, afraid you’d run into Jimin.

You hadn’t seen him since Friday night. He hadn’t given any signs of life either, his apartment remaining dead silent, to your dismay. Or maybe he had just been so hungover it was taking him a few days to recover. From the state that he had been in, you wouldn’t have been surprised.

Dripping water on the marble floor of the hall, you walked towards the elevator, bowing to the security. The man bowed to you too, but he remained silent. You knew he greeted most of everyone else, but you didn’t really mind.

You were a foreigner after all.

Hoseok’s words had turned in your head, ever since he had said them, right before he had left. You didn’t really know what to make of it. Jimin had been asking for your name… Part of you didn’t want it to mean anything, because really you didn’t want to think that the Park Jimin had an interest in you, even if it was just about knowing your name. Though the other part, the smaller anxious part of you that felt sorry for him… it wanted to know if his curiosity was about more than just knowing your name. You knew it was the remnants of the fan in you speaking, but sometimes, when you didn’t really pay attention, that part of you became louder, threatening to blossom into a flower that’d throw a shadow on the resentment you wanted to keep towards him.

You didn’t even know why you wanted to hold on to that resentment. Perhaps it was just your way of protecting yourself from him, because God knew that Park Jimin was dangerous. Beautiful, yes, but the same kind of beautiful a poisonous plant was made of, luxurious with life but able to end you all the same.

The doors to the elevator slid open, and you were relieved to see that it was fully empty. You walked in, pressing on your floor before standing to the side, eyes falling to the coffee stain on the carpet. Your thoughts provided you with an image you didn’t want to picture – Jimin, bending over to throw up in that spot.

Had he been the source of the stain on the carpet, as he had been close to stain the carpet next to your apartments? You shuddered at the thought and focused on the numbers changing over the elevator door as you went up to the very last level, trying to shake the image out of your mind.

The elevator decelerated, and the doors slid open slowly. You were about to walk out when you noticed the figure standing there.

Of course Jimin had to be there when you were drenched in rain water.

You exchanged a long look, or it just felt like an eternity because you were gazing into the eyes of Park Jimin. His face held no expression whatsoever, as if he was too tired to even muster up the usual scowl he reserved for you. And really, he did look tired, dark circles under his eyes indicating that he probably hadn’t slept much in the last two days.

Or maybe the hangover was just taking its toll on him.

The moment stretched, and you found you had to look away. Your gaze dropped to the floor, and you were about to say something – what you didn’t know – when the doors started closing, and Jimin held up an arm to keep them from doing so.

“You might want to get out before I go in”, he said, and his voice was lazily arrogant, as if he wanted for it to be cocky but exhaustion kept it from reaching its attended goal.

You rolled your eyes, nodding before taking a step forward. He was standing in the middle of the way, and your whole body started burning as you realized you had stepped closer to him. You only then looked up, meeting his empty gaze. He looked as if he was clenching his jaw, and that, more than anything, made you see red.

“You might want to get out of my way”, you said, your voice colder than his had been. Not arrogant, but maybe a little condescending.

Scratch that, it had been fully condescending.

It seemed to catch him off guard, because his eyes slightly widened and he blinked once, slowly.

“So, you finally talk”, he said, and there was the ghost of a smirk on his lips.

Not the kind of smirk that might make you feel warm and fluffy inside. It rather only fueled your anger.

“I talked on Friday too, but maybe you were too fucked out to realize?” Your words were coated in honey, the poisonous kind, and you wondered where you had found the courage to speak to him like that.

Especially as his arm was still outstretched, and it almost felt as if you were frozen in place, a statue of that moment before a hug.

“Oh no, I do remember.” He smirked full on, then, and it made his eyes seem cold in some way.

Cold and sad.

“Weren’t you the one to clean up after me?” he asked, tilting his head by a few degrees to the side.

“I didn’t want the hallway to smell like you did”, you said, shrugging your shoulders. “It had nothing to do with you.”

A chuckle fell from his lips. “It rather felt as if you were eager to have a role to play in my life.”

Your mouth fell open, but you had nothing to say to that.

“Is that why you moved next door too?” he asked, and he sounded so full of himself you wanted to slap him.

Unfortunately, your courage was running out, and red flushed your cheeks.

“I didn’t know you lived next door until the day I moved in”, you admitted, and your voice didn’t sound half as confident as it did a moment earlier.

That seemed to take him aback. “Your boyfriend didn’t tell you?”

There he was again with the boyfriend thing.

“What boyfriend are you talking about?” you enquired, glancing to your right as he let his arm fall.

He cocked an eyebrow, letting out a bitter chuckle. “The one I met when you visited the apartment a few months ago?”

Of all the things you had expected him to say, admitting that he had met Collin wasn’t one of those. Why had your ex never told you?

“You met Collin?”

It was a rhetorical and useless question, but your lips had formulated it before you had been able to stop it. And Jimin didn’t answer it, as if he too knew that it was rhetorical.

“He decided to stay back home”, you admitted, hating that you were giving Jimin this tiny piece of information about you. Because it made your heart ache a little at the thought that you could have been building a life for yourself back home, if you hadn’t chosen to move to the other side of the globe.

“Is that code word for saying he dumped you?”

Jimin’s voice had taken on an even icier tone, so far away from the friendliness his idol self projected whenever he was on camera. It hurt some deep part of you, that stupid tiny part that still wanted to believe he wasn’t a total prick.

“It was a mutual decision”, you muttered, looking down at the floor.

He stayed silent, right as you started blinking away tears. You would be damned if one of them slipped on your cheek when Jimin was standing right there in front of you.

“Isn’t that what we all say when we get dumped?” he asked, and surprisingly his tone held nothing of the bite it did before. He just sounded tired, in a genuine kind of way that made him seem terribly human.

It made you look up to meet his gaze, yet you remained silent. You had no words to say to that, no clever turn of phrase, because you didn’t want to lie to his face, had always hated lying, and you didn’t want to tell him he was right either. You didn’t think you’d be able to stand the vulnerability the truth held.

He already had enough power over you.

“Anyway”, he said once the silence had stretched for a few more seconds. His lips pressed in a thin line, and your eyes dropped to his mouth. “I’m sorry about Friday.”

The last thing you had expected him to do was apologize, and you just looked at him for a moment, completely baffled. And right when awkwardness filled the air, you shrugged your shoulders.

“It’s whatever, I would have done it for anyone.”

A weak attempt at trying to regain the advantage in the conversation, though it seemed to fail miserably.

He stepped aside, to finally let you pass, and you started moving, almost gulping as you felt the heaviness of his gaze on your profile. Once you had walked a few feet down the hallway, you glanced over your shoulder, that foolish part of you that wanted to believe he wasn’t all bad winning over your rationality.

He was still looking at you, and your breath caught in your throat.

“You never told me your name”, Jimin said, voice so low you would have thought he hadn’t spoken hadn’t you seen his lips move.

“Why do you want to know?” you asked.

He looked down, eyes seeming to get lost into a void, a void you could tell was haunting his mind.

“Never mind”, he said.

You felt bad, for a moment, as you watched him get into the elevator.

The foolish part of you won.

“Y/n”, you said, right as the doors started closing.

He met your gaze, eyes a little round, as if startled you had given in to him. Though he didn’t have time to speak before the doors fully shut, completely hiding him from your view.

 ***

              The week passed in a blur, and you didn’t get to see Jimin again, except once in the distance at the grocery store of the condominium. He had locked gaze with you, bowed his head a little and then he had disappeared from view, and you hadn’t really searched for him.

The fact he had acknowledged you existed didn’t have to mean anything at all.

Friday night came, and you found yourself accepting Chaeyoung’s invite to go clubbing, the young woman’s enthusiasm making you feel a little more extroverted than you usually were.

As a matter of fact, you had avoided clubs like the plague back home, but maybe that was just because your mom was famous, and people tended to recognize you too. Here, you had found that even though lots of people were aware of your mom’s existence, few were those that connected the dots between you two. So, you were willing to risk it and go out, because at 24 you had still never stepped foot in a club.

Chaeyoung came over at your place to get ready, and you were unsure why you had suggested it. Realized it probably had been a mistake once you remembered that Chaeyoung had no idea how rich you were.

Indeed, the girl’s eyes had been wide ever since you had gotten home, and she avoided touching something as if scared she’d break it.

“You can sit, you know”, you said, as you were yourself sat in front of one of the vanities in your dressing room.

Chaeyoung let out a nervous chuckle. “Why didn’t you mention you live in Nine One before?” she blurted, and you knew the question had been on the girl’s lips for a while now.

You shrugged. “It didn’t seem like it mattered all that much”, you replied. You met Chaeyoung’s eyes in the mirror. “Sorry.”

Chaeyoung laughed lightly, a pretty sound that resembled a melody of some sort. “No need to apologize, I’m just jealous.” She winked at you in the mirror, and you giggled along with her.

It was crazy that you had become friends after only two weeks of knowing each other. Before you could reply, your phone started ringing, and your gaze fell to it.

You felt as if your blood had turned to ice in your veins as you saw Collin’s name on the lit-up screen. It still had the heart emoji you had put next to it, back when you were together. Strangely enough, you hadn’t found the strength to put it away yet.

“Who’s that?” Chaeyoung enquired with a gentle voice, as if sensing your uneasiness.

There was no point in beating around the bush, so you replied, “My ex.”

Chaeyoung pursed her lips, nostrils flaring as if she was disgusted. “Ew.”

It made you laugh just a little, but you weren’t quite sure the joy of it had reached your eyes.

Why the hell would Collin be calling you? Wasn’t it the middle of the night back where you had come from?

“I… will take this”, you said, hesitant.

Chaeyoung nodded, looking away from you and the ringing device. “As long as you spill the tea after.”

You stifled a laugh, a real one this time, before grabbing your phone. You accepted the call, bringing the device to your ear as you got up to walk away, needing a little privacy for the conversation, whatever it might hold.

Collin’s tired voice on the other side of the line had your heart aching dully in your chest.

“Hey”, he said.

A simple word, but it was an echo of the word that had started your whole relationship. A small hey from the cute boy at the coffee shop, when you had just been seventeen and too young to see the danger in his eyes.

Or maybe you had been the dangerous one, with your dreams of leaving the country and never looking back.

“What’s up?” you asked, feeling slightly strange at having to speak English. You hadn’t spoken English since you had talked to your parents the weekend before.

You were adjusting to the Korean life far more than you had first thought you were.

“I…” Collin trailed off, and there was a silence that had you wonder what he might be thinking about.

That had you wonder what his next words might hold, and that had you beating yourself up for the hope that seeped into your mind.

“I have something to confess”, he finally finished, and this time he didn’t wait before continuing. “I’m dating someone new, and she… she’s giving birth right now.”

You were standing in the middle of the hallway leading to your bedroom, left foot in the middle of the air, but you froze in the middle of your step.

For one, you hadn’t known Collin was dating someone new, and for second… she was giving birth?

It was such a strange situation that your heart forgot to ache, as you put your foot down next to the other.

“What?” you said, letting out a nervous chuckle.

“We were together for a long time, so I wanted you to hear it from me.”

His words were filled with an information you couldn’t quite grasp. As if he was telling you something you already knew, but couldn’t grasp the meaning of. It was like listening to someone speaking another language. Knowing that the sounds they were sewing together had a meaning, but the meaning was just a little out of reach.

“You wanted to tell me your new girlfriend is giving birth?” you asked, and your voice was filled with laughter. The maniacal kind, the one that you usually let out when you were deeply hurt.

Yet there was no pain in you, only astonishment.

“Everything indicates that I’m the father, Y/n”, Collin admitted, with the gentlest voice, as if he was comforting a small hurt child.

It was like the world had stopped turning, only to start going backwards. Like crashing into a brick wall going eighty miles per hour, and looking at the aftermath, at the mess left behind that wasn’t quite human anymore.

It was horrifying, really. Because it meant so much, so much so that your brain didn’t want to understand. Maybe to try to preserve you from destruction, because it promised to be too grand, like the final scene of a horror movie, filled with gore and fear and despair.

“We broke up two months ago”, was what your brain could come up with.

Refusing to do the maths just yet, just trying to ease your body into the truth slowly, gently.

“I know”, Collin let out, and he sounded sad. Sad and guilty and everything in between. “It happened last October.”

Your memory was empty of all the souvenirs it had once held, as you tried to reach for what had happened in October.

“You remember when you told me that you were actually going to move to Korea?” Collin asked, and there was a strain to his voice, one you recognized all too well.

He had spoken the same way when his father had died, and you had held his sobbing form until the early hours of the morning, until he had fallen asleep from the exhaustion of his grief.

“It killed me, and I saw Harper and… it just happened”, he continued.

You let out a bitter chuckle, now, as the first emotion to rise from the hole in your chest surprisingly was anger. The kind of anger only a wounded soul could come up with.

“Just happened?” you repeated. “What, you walked in and your dick fell into her pussy?”

Harper had always been a source of conflict, in your whole relationship. She had been his childhood best friend, but she had been soon-to-be married for almost two years now, the wedding date having been pushed back twice because of the pandemic.

Clearly, your relationship hadn’t been the only one to die on the shore of your dreams to move to Korea, if Harper was now dating Collin.

Collin stayed silent and really, maybe you didn’t have anything to tell each other anymore. But the anger inside of you wasn’t quite done yet.

“That’s why you chose to stay, didn’t you?” you asked. “Because you put a baby in her belly, and she offered you what you’ve always wanted.”

Collin sniffled on the other side of the line. “I wanted that with you, you know. Until you decided to leave. What was I supposed to do, come with you?”

You full-on laughed this time, but there was no happiness behind the sound at all. Just a whole abyss you were afraid you’d fall into if you gazed at it for too long. “Yes, like we had planned. We even got an apartment together, remember?”

Collin echoed your own laugh with a chuckle, something between choking and scoffing. “That apartment was never mine, you signed the papers and didn’t even ask me to sign too.”

He was right. And for all you had known back then, not wanting to have him on the papers had been a good decision. You had been right, as if your past self had known about the chaos that was to come.

“Listen, thank you for telling me, Collin, but I have a friend that’s waiting for me and I really don’t have anything to say to you”, you said, voice coated in ice.

You hoped you could shape the ice into a dagger, and stab it into his heart.

“Y/n, I just wanted you to learn from me, I assumed…”

You hung up. Hung up on him and on the whole relationship you had shared, as if it had never mattered. And maybe that was it. Maybe he never should have mattered at all, because you were bound to part ways anyway.

He was bound to be a lesson in your life, as you had been bound to emigrate to Korea. Call it faith or whatever.

***

             Learning that your ex-boyfriend of six years and a half cheated on you proved to be quite a motivation to get plastered, even if Chaeyoung seemed concerned at first. A few shots of tequila in, the girl loosened up, and she stopped seeing the darkness in your eyes. Or so you hoped, because you didn’t want to have to face it just yet.

You wanted to surf the crescent of the wave until the last moment possible, when it pummeled into you and swallowed you whole. You weren’t quite sure you’d ever really get out of it if you allowed yourself to feel the emotions that you could glimpse at, down that black hole where your heart used to be.

So, it was in that state of mind that you partied, drinking until your mind went numb, and then some more until your body went numb too and all you could feel was the sway of the booming music in the club.

There were no thoughts in your head, just the music and the alcohol, and for now, it was all you needed. You knew you’d come to face the emotions one day, but not today.

Today you’d party and celebrate until the night ended. And you did just that, even when Chaeyoung started showing signs of exhaustion, and started mentioning going home. Even when Chaeyoung called a taxi, and you tried to down a few more shots before the car would come.

You only stopped when your friend forced you into the taxi, gave the address to the driver and told you to call her if you needed her. As much as you would have wanted for her to stay with you, Chaeyoung had her mother to take care of back home, from what she had already told you. So, you drunkenly waved at your friend from the taxi’s window, and when she disappeared out of sight, you let the darkness engulfed you.

The taxi driver did the polite thing and let you cry in peace, though the tears mostly rolled down your cheeks silently. The pain in your chest was far too grand for the kind that’d shake your body with sobs. As if all your muscles were too exhausted, and only the tears seemed to be able to well up in your eyes.

It was surprising, how little you cried. And you stopped crying, even before you got to the condominium. No, your eyes were dry as the desert as you reached home, and you didn’t even know how you managed to pay the driver before getting out and stumbling to the doors.

You didn’t know either how you managed to get to the elevator that led to your floor, the one where you had met Park Jimin. And you cursed loudly, in English, once you saw that the elevator was out.

This night couldn’t get any worse.

You dragged your feet towards the staircase, head turning so much you were afraid you’d be sick. It made you think of Jimin, who had been just like you a week ago. That made you giggle, in that silly kind of way only alcohol could muster out of someone, and you stumbled a little as you reached the door to the staircase. You pushed it open, quite a lot more forcefully than you needed to, and this time you flew, feet not touching the ground until you fell, hands coming in front of your face at the last moment.

You laughed again then, because you were way too inebriated to feel anything. You scrambled up to your feet, swaying a little more than you had before, head spinning faster and faster for each second that passed.

You started the trek up to your floor, not really feeling how your heart beat loudly from the exhaustion. No, the alcohol was numbing that too and really, you’d give anything to stay in that state of bliss that accompanied the intoxication.

You surprisingly reached the ninth floor without another incident, and you pushed open the door that led to your hallway, before stumbling towards the door of your home, hands searching your purse for your keys.

There was no chance in hell your drunk mind would remember the passcode you had to dial to get in.

With a successful little “there you go!”, you fished out your keys, right as you reached your door. You fumbled with the keys for a moment, as you tried to get them into the keyhole. It took you quite a few attempts, and it led to you giggling a little again.

It seemed the ride home had made you a lot drunker than you had been back at the club.

You finally managed to steady your hand enough to get the key in, resting your head against the door. The key seemed to get stuck, and you let out a curse under your breath, as you tried turning it in the lock.

The lock didn’t budge. However, the door did, and you stumbled forward. Your fall was cut short by hands on your shoulders, that held you up just for a moment until you found footing again.

It took you a moment to look up, mind miles away from the man standing in front of you.

“What are you doing?” Jimin asked.

You furrowed your brows. “What are you doing in my apartment?”

Jimin cocked an eyebrow. “Your apartment was on the other side of the hallway, last I checked.” He glanced over your head. “Still is.”

You shut your eyes, as everything seemed to be moving. Even Jimin’s eyes didn’t seem to be stable in his face.

“The elevator was out”, you said as an explanation. You cracked an eye open, only to see the scowl on Jimin’s face.

The one you had started to hate more and more every day, until you loathed it. So much so that just the sight of it had anger flaring up in your chest. You had no inhibition left to refrain from telling him to go fuck himself after all.

“Do you know”, you started, a hiccup interrupting your words. “Do you know how disappointing it is to meet your favourite idol and have them be a dick to you?”

Jimin remained silent, but the expression died on his face, right as he glanced down at your keys, that had somehow stayed in your hands during the whole ordeal.

You had gotten rid of the Chimmy keychain the day before you had started working at the elementary school, and it clearly didn’t go unnoticed by him.

“I had always dreamed of meeting you someday. Of meeting BTS”, you continued, shutting your eyes again, willing the world to stop turning so fast around your head. “Hobi was fine but you, Park Jimin, are a fucking asshole.”

He still didn’t say anything, right as you started feeling your insides churning.

Of course you were going to be sick right after having told him your truth.

And maybe you blacked out for a moment because next thing you remembered was being huddled over a toilet, retching everything you had drunk that night – well, what you hadn’t absorbed yet. It set your throat on fire, and cold beads of sweat rolled down your temples, along with tears, those tears that always came with throwing up.

And then there was another blank space between this moment and the next, and your mind focused back in as someone was gently wiping your face with a cool cloth. You startled back, arms rising up in front of you, in a poor attempt of defense.

“What’s going on?” you asked, and tears stung at your eyes again.

“I’m just taking your make-up off”, Jimin said, hands raised to show he was not a threat. “You can finish doing it if you want.”

You started crying then, for real. It was the last thing you remembered that night, and everything went black.

***

                 You had never thought your head could possibly hurt that much. Yet it pounded with a terrible headache as you slowly woke up, body feeling all too warm for your own good. And then the dehydration hit, and you cracked an eye open, trying to find something you could drink.

There was a glass of water next to your head, on a night table, and you grabbed it, downing it as if you had been parched for years. You then rested your head back on the pillow, sighing at the soft silk of it, and you dozed off.

You couldn’t tell how much longer you had slept. Once you woke up again, the headache had lessened a bit, but it was still throbbing at your temples. You knew you’d need a full day to recover from the amount of alcohol you had ingested last night. Maybe even the whole weekend.

That thought led you to another, far more painful one. Collin and his girlfriend. And his baby, and the fact that he had cheated on you, and hid it from you for months.

You sighed, heavily and maybe a little shakily too, as your heart hurt in your chest. Somehow, the tears didn’t come though, and you managed to open your eyes.

It took a moment for your gaze to adjust to the scene surrounding you. A little eternity, even. Or maybe it just wasn’t adjusting because of the unfamiliar scene.

You blinked a few times, willing your bedroom to appear to your vision, but the dark sheets stayed the same, along with the mounted TV on the wall in front of you. You only then pushed yourself up, sitting in the bed as you scanned your surroundings.

You definitely weren’t in your bedroom. Neither were you in your apartment. There were discarded items of clothing on the floor – a black pair of jeans at the foot of the mattress, two t-shirts by the window, under the dark curtains, and enough lonely socks to form a whole army of them. It was the picture on top of the dresser whose middle drawer was pulled open that caught your gaze the most though.

All the BTS members smiled at you from their spot on the dresser, looking like a little family. It was a polaroid picture, and really it was far enough for you to wonder how you’d managed to be able to tell that those were the BTS members. Then again, you had been a fan of them for years now, and could recognize them from their shadows, so maybe being able to recognize their familiar traits in the distance wasn’t too far fetched.

Your mind went blank, as you tried to remember the events of last night. All you could remember was waving goodbye to Chaeyoung, before the taxi had driven you home.

Well, clearly it hadn’t quite driven you home, because this was not your room at all.

You looked down at yourself, and at the black sheet that was pooling around your waist. You were wearing an oversized purple sweater, one you had only seen behind the screen of your phone before.

How the fuck had you managed to get to Jimin’s bedroom? And more importantly, why were you dressed in his clothes?

You pulled the sheets off from you, sighing in relief as you noticed you were wearing joggers. Then the sudden realization that he had probably been the one to change you into those clothes had your heart stopping in your chest, and your cheeks burned with embarrassment.

Knowing how you were when you usually blacked out with alcohol, there wasn’t a high chance you had been the one to change your clothes.

You looked around, only then noticing the folded clothes next to the BTS picture on the dresser. You recognized the colors from the outfit you had been wearing the night before, and you got up from the bed, stepping around the mattress to get to your clothes.

You couldn’t help but take a good look at the picture, heart filling with endearment at how adorable it was. At how happy they all looked, frozen into eternity in that little square of memory. From the looks of it, the picture had been taken on a camping trip, and it made you smile a little to think that they had gone on camping trips together, without ever sharing those to the public.

You wondered how much they had done without sharing it to the public too. It was like realizing that all of them were complete human beings, and that they weren’t confined to the screen of your phone. It had been a thing to know it before, but you were now fully realizing it. They all had their own lives, with ups and downs like every other person on the surface of the planet.

It made their hiatus – it wasn’t really a break though, wasn’t it? – all the more understandable.

With one last look at the picture, you grabbed your clothes. The door of the bedroom was shut, and you contemplated getting changed right there because there was no way you’d bring Jimin’s clothes into your own home. You weren’t quite sure you wanted your life to be mixed with his in such a personal way.

Excluding the fact that you had slept in his bed, that is.

You changed out of his clothes and into your own, wincing a little at the smell of spilled alcohol on your top. It made your stomach churn, but it was completely empty, and it saved you the embarrassment of throwing up in the middle of his bedroom.

Though you had a sudden flashback of throwing up the night before. You doubted you had been at home, if you had ended up in his room after all.

Your purse laid on the dresser too, and you grabbed it, looking through its contents to make sure everything was in there. Your cards and keys were there, and so was your phone, though it was dead and had probably been for a while now.

Once you had made sure you had collected all your belongings, you walked towards the door, taking a deep sigh before reaching for the knob. You turned it gently, trying not to make any noise. Before getting out, you threw one last look at the purple sweater you had been wearing, longing for the feeling of its soft fabric on your skin. You pushed the thought away, and then tiptoed soundlessly out of the room, or as silently as your hungover self could manage.

It proved to be useless, because Jimin’s apartment was shaped like yours, and the hallway outside of his bedroom led you to the living room, where he was currently sprawled on the couch, playing some videogame.

He paused it as soon as you came into view, eyes sweeping over your figure once before meeting yours.

“How did you sleep?” he asked, and he sounded genuine.

You had no idea what you looked like, but from how you felt you knew you probably looked like hell.

“Good”, you replied, feeling awkward standing there. “Did you…” you trailed off, glancing at the couch, and at the blanket and pillow that were resting on one side of it. “You slept on the couch?”

He chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. “Yes.”

There was a long silence as you scanned his apartment, surprised to see just how alike it was to yours. Though Jimin’s furniture was mostly darker than yours, except for the couch, which was in a lighter shade of gray. It felt like you had stepped into an alternate universe to the one you usually lived in.

“What happened last night?” you then asked, because visibly he was the only one who could answer that question, as your memories were still failing you.

He pursed his lips in an apologetic expression that had a hint of a smile in there. “You were pretty wasted.”

You nodded, pulling at some dry skin on your bottom lip. “Yeah, I mean… apart from that?”

He smiled a little then, and you watched it as if it was alien on his features. “You tried unlocking my door and when I opened you called me an asshole. And then you got sick”, he said that motioning in the general direction of the front door, “so I pulled you to the bathroom.”

As he spoke, you had tiny little flashes from last night – just images your eyes remembered they had seen, but it was a silent track, and you winced as he recalled the events of last night.

And really there had been more than you had thought. Apparently, you had thrown up for a while, then asked for food, then thrown up some more. Once you had started passing out on the couch, he had taken your make-up off, which had woken you up. You had then started crying, and told him everything about Collin, and you had fallen asleep on the couch, before he had carried you to his room. He admitted he had been the one to change you – promising he hadn’t looked though, right as his cheeks turned pink – and it made you want to disappear through the floor.

Park Jimin had seen you almost entirely naked. Most of all, Park Jimin had taken care of you when you had been so drunk you barely could pass as a human being. You didn’t know what to make of that.

“I am so sorry for all that”, you apologized when he was done, cheeks flushed red with embarrassment.

He laughed again then, and his lips broke into a grin. That smile sent your mind into a frenzy your hangover self couldn’t deal with.

“It’s okay”, he reassured you. “You clearly needed someone, I’m glad I could be there for you.”

His smile died down as he said the last words, and your gaze dropped to the ground, eyes following the lines in the hardwood floor.

“I’m sorry for calling you an asshole”, you added.

You saw him shrug from the corner of your eyes. “I honestly think it was well-deserved.”

That made you chuckle a little, and you looked up, though you didn’t find any reply to that. You exchanged an awkward look, until Jimin motioned towards the kitchen.

“I got hangover soup for you, if you want to eat that before heading home.”

There was an invitation behind those words. Maybe even a truce, to the hostility that you had shared ever since you’d met. And really, the Jimin in front of you right now was nothing like the one you had come to know in the last month. He rather was the idol you had admired all those years, and you didn’t know what had caused the switch. Though you weren’t stupid, and you were pretty sure your vulnerability had made him feel guilty, and maybe that was his way of apologizing. He had even admitted to being in the wrong, hadn’t he?

Perhaps that was the reason why you found yourself saying yes.

 ***

            Eating proved to help ease the throbbing in your head, as did the ibuprofen Jimin had gotten for you. He had also made you drink plenty of water, as you had conversed about the weather and your work, both avoiding the subject of last night.

You were still very much so embarrassed, and you’d rather pretend it had never happened.

Jimin made it easier, as he was being quite friendlier than you had ever seen him – in person, that is – and it healed some part of the fan in you that had been hurt repeatedly by his actions, whether you had wanted to admit it to yourself or not.

Talking to him also helped ease the pain you had felt the night before, the thought of Collin somehow infrequent when Jimin was looking at you, listening to what you had to say.

There was a shadow, in Jimin’s eyes. That no amount of smiling and laughing could chase away. Every time you’d see the cloud pass in his gaze, you’d be reminded of just how human he was. How real he was. As if you’d always seen him as some sort of god, and were just now realizing that he was just like you.

A little more famous, yes, but just like anyone else.

It was a thought that hit you in the chest, whenever you thought about it. And you had thought about it quite a couple of times since you had met Jimin that first time, but mostly in the last week or two. Ever since you had seen him so drunk he had looked like he was going to die.

Maybe he had been feeling that way too. And now, he had seen you at your lowest too, and your heart warmed a little in your chest each time you remembered that he had taken care of you. He could have easily brought you back home – it wasn’t like the walk was a long one – but he had instead taken care of you. Listened to what drunk you had had to say, and comforted you, apparently. Not that you really could recall the events of last night, but you sometimes did have flashes of his eyes holding yours, with a soft expression that made you wonder about who that Jimin was.

Because he wasn’t the same as the one you’d gotten to know ever since moving to Korea, and neither was he the one that was sitting in front of you right now, talking about things that didn’t really matter, trivial conversation aimed to fill a silence that threatened to fall into awkwardness the moment you stopped talking.

After all, it wasn’t like you were friends. Neighbors, yes, who had both seen the other at their lowest, but just neighbors, nonetheless. He made it easy, though. He made talking easy, in a way you couldn’t quite understand yet. And you weren’t quite sure you’d grasp the meaning of it someday, but you were glad for it.

God knew how awkward you could get when you were in an uncomfortable situation.

“Thank you, for last night”, you said as he walked you to his door once you were done eating.

“No problem”, he replied, flashing a grin at you.

It didn’t quite exactly reach his eyes, but you liked to tell yourself it did.

“I’ll try not doing something like that again”, you added, cheeks flushing red as your eyes dropped to the floor.

He chuckled, shrugging his shoulders. “Really, I didn’t mind. It was great to hang out with you, even if you were drunk.”

The blush on your cheeks deepened. Park Jimin, saying it had been great to hang out with you? Surely you were just stuck in a dream. One hell of a good dream, but a dream nonetheless.

“Well, I’m probably more fun when I’m sober and…” you trailed off, as your thoughts produced their first image of Collin ever since you had started eating that hangover soup – who knew hangover soup was so good?

Jimin had a gentle smile on his lips once you met his gaze again. “We all have our lows. After you cleaning up after me last week, it was the least I could do.”

The corners of your lips itched to stretch into a smile, and your heart started racing in your chest as he glanced at your lips. “Well”, you let out, gulping.

His smile turned into a knowing smirk as his eyes fell to the ground. Who had thought you’d get a tiny taste of the flirty Park Jimin on that hangover Saturday morning? Because clearly that smirk meant nothing good.

“I’ll let you head home”, he said after a moment, eyes moving back up to your face.

You almost startled as you noticed the shadows had cleared up, and his eyes were lit up with a spark of mischief.

You nodded, glancing at the door. You didn’t move, and Jimin cocked an eyebrow, hands burrowing in the pockets of his dark sweater.

“I…” you started, then your heart stuttered in your chest so bad you thought you were going to have an anxiety attack.

You took a deep breath, right as he scanned your features curiously. And then you decided to hell with your anxiety, and you formulated the question that was on your mind.

Jimin just looked at you, unblinkingly, right as the clouds moved back in his eyes.

“I don’t think we should”, he replied, before adding quickly, “Not that you’re not fun to be around. I just… I don’t think you want to be around me right now.”

There it was. A little piece of the truth that made Jimin who he was. You took it gently, tucking it in a safe corner of your mind.

“The least I can do to repay you for last night is cook some meal for you”, you said, shrugging.

Your heart was still beating out of your chest, but now that the invitation was out there, you felt as if you were relieved of the weight that was pressing down on you, weight brought on by your embarrassment about last night.

He held your gaze for a moment, before nodding curtly. “Okay.” He wet his lips, sighing once. “I’ll think about it. If you want, we can exchange phone numbers, and I’ll let you know?”

You nodded, taking a deep breath to ease the wild beats of your heart. “My phone is dead, but…”

He had his phone in his hands before you had even said your second word. “No worries, put your number in mine.”

He unlocked it, handing the cellphone to you. Your fingers brushed as you grabbed it, and for a moment you were stuck in a cheesy movie, and you could almost hear the music starting to play in the background.

For God’s sake, just the slight touch of his fingers against yours had made fireworks blow up in your mind. You really needed to get yourself in check, if you wanted to try to be friends with him.

You put in your number, before handing his phone back to him. This time, your fingers didn’t touch, and it almost disappointed you.

That scared you to no ends. Who were you to think you were worth Park Jimin’s friendship anyway?

 ***

                 If there was one thing you hadn’t expected from giving your phone number to the Park Jimin, it was how much of a texter he was. Indeed, there hadn’t been a single day he hadn’t texted you since Saturday, sending you memes he found funny or asking you about your day.

It made your heart do somersaults in your chest each time, even as you tried to calm it down. To remind it that you were just yourself, and that he was so much more than you. That you weren’t part of the same universe, other than that of being neighbors.

Maybe you were just being pessimistic, but you had to protect your heart somehow, right?

You highly doubted it really worked though. Because when you rode the elevator together with him on Wednesday evening, Jimin blabbered on and on about something you found you couldn’t really listen to, yet your heart seemed to be in synch with every word he said.

Not only was he a texter, but he was a talker too. You didn’t mind it one bit. No, it was so much more than that cold silence he had offered you for a month.

You wondered what he had been doing, in the last few days. Because the air around him didn’t seem quite as heavy as it had been before, and though there were still shadows in his eyes, you could see the sun peeking through the clouds. Sometimes they even scattered away, as if strong winds had pulled their heaviness away from him.

It was truly beautiful to see.

“What about you?” Jimin suddenly asked.

You zoned back in, glancing at him and blinking once as the doors slid open. “Uh?” you let out.

He laughed, heartily, head throwing back like you had seen him do so many times behind the screen of your phone. The real thing didn’t compare to it – no, it was so much more, like you had just been blessed by a rare phenomenon, one you knew you’d come to cherish.

“You weren’t listening to a word I said, weren’t you?”

The duality of Park Jimin confused you deeply. How could he have gone from ice itself to that warm smiley boy?

“Sorry, I’ve had a long day”, you lied.

No, it wasn’t the long day that was playing with your mind. It rather was him that clouded your thoughts, him and the fragrance of his cologne.

You hadn’t thought someone could smell so good before you’d stood in that elevator with him on a random Wednesday evening.

He pursed his lips in a sympathetic smile as you walked out of the elevator, aiming for your respective doors. “Well, I told you I wasn’t doing much tonight, and asked about you.”

Was that an invitation, hidden behind his words?

“Oh”, you let out. “I have leftover pasta from last night, so I’m probably just going to eat that and then chill.”

He nodded, that same soft smile still adorning his lips. “Sounds yummy.”

You really didn’t know where you found the courage to say that, but you said, “I have enough for two, if you want.”

He squinted his eyes a little, as if suspicious, before nodding once. “I need to take a shower, but I can come over in fifteen minutes.”

The sentence was said like a question, and you chuckled. For what you didn’t know.

“Sure, I’ll take a shower too.”

He nodded his head, grinning a little before dialing the code to his apartment. “Then see you soon.”

It’s strange, how friendship sometimes blossoms from the least expected place. Like a flower growing out of a crack in cement, or like the first weed piercing the blanket of snow after a long winter. Your friendship with Jimin felt just like that – him having been the cement you had somehow cracked open, that night you had broken down in front of him.

Just as you had had to finally let Collin go, Jimin had walked into your life, filling a hole that had threatened to swallow you whole for a time. You had never realized just how much you had wanted to find a way to make it work with Collin, until you had learned about Harper and him and their baby. In some deep dark corner of you, you had thought Collin would follow you, someday. The realization that he wouldn’t, on that Friday night, had been like a wake-up call you had desperately needed. That, and the unexpected friendship you and Jimin shared.

After that night he came over to eat pasta, you started to hang out frequently. He even invited you to the party for the release of Hoseok’s new album, though you had had to refuse. You didn’t really do parties like that. And maybe if you and Jimin had been friends for longer than 24h, you would have said yes, but you hadn’t been.

Yet, even though you hadn’t gone, he had come over to your place after. You were lucky you only taught two afternoon classes on Friday, because otherwise you would have been completely dead the next day. But everything had gone alright, and Jimin had apologized profusely for coming over so late, and he had offered getting ice cream together as an apology.

You had done that quite a lot, at the beginning. Finding reasons to hang out again, that is. Until you had stopped asking the other, just knocking on the other’s door whenever you felt like hanging out.

Slowly but surely, Jimin weaved its way into the tapestry that was your life, so thoroughly that you couldn’t imagine it without him now. Though you both never crossed that line between friendship and more, and really you were thankful for it.

You definitely weren’t ready to get involved in a relationship anyway.

And you had been right, about him becoming a better neighbor. Indeed, as the shadows in his eyes became infrequent whenever you were around, Jimin stopped acting like he had at first, the loud music becoming a rare occurrence with you usually being present. He also kept his apartment clean and organized, saying he didn’t want you to see the filth he had lived in for a couple of months. It was endearing, in some way, though you usually helped him with the cleaning, because he always helped you with yours. And he had stopped leaving his trash outside his door, preventing the hallway from taking a sour odor you really didn’t wish to smell ever again.

One late September evening, you found yourself cuddled on Jimin’s couch, holding a pillow tight to your chest as you were watching a lame horror movie. Hoseok was sprawled on the carpet, and Jimin had mentioned another one of his friends – Sungwoon – coming over later, though you hadn’t met him yet. It was strange, as he was one of Jimin’s closest friends, but then again you rarely hung out with other people.

That was a lie. You hung out with Chaeyoung and her girlfriend plenty, but that was only because Chaeyoung found way too many excuses for you to hang out together. She had mentioned the terms “double date” more than once, and each time you had glared at your friend until she had apologized. Though clearly Chaeyoung was set on one thing and one thing only – make sure you forgot everything about Collin, and it seemed she believed getting together with Jimin would be the key to that.

Perhaps it was weird, but you had promised yourself you weren’t going to indulge into the drug that Park Jimin was. And so far you hadn’t been tempted – Jimin was just an overall really friendly person, underneath that cold persona he had sported at the beginning, and he had helped you when you were at a low point. 

One thing was for sure: you were aware of him, all the time. Because Jimin shone in every room he stepped in, and it was hard to look away from him. To ignore the heady scent of his fragrance, even as it made your body react in a way you always pushed away to the far back of your mind.

You blamed it on the fact that you were a woman and he, a man. It was bound to make you feel something once in a while. Not forgetting the fact that he was goddamn Park Jimin.

You scoffed and Jimin threw you a questioning glance. You slightly shook your head, to indicate that you were alright, before focusing back on the TV. Jimin didn’t say anything either, and you watched the movie for a while, without glancing at each other again. A rectangle of light near the floor also had you realizing that Hoseok wasn’t paying attention to the movie at all, instead scrolling on Instagram.

The music swelled, catching your attention, and the end of the movie flashed before your eyes, all the main characters dying one by one at the hand of a crazy ventriloquist doll, whose tongue got longer and longer with each person it killed. It was terrifyingly captivating, and you found you couldn’t look away, even if the movie was over all not the scary movie you had expected it’d be.

Once the credits started rolling on the screen, and the pumping of the blood in your veins finally slowed back down, you all moved towards the kitchen, in the hope that you’d find a wine bottle in the fridge. Which you did, and you were halfway through your first glass when Sungwoon arrived, and luckily enough the young man had brought refills for the coffers – beer and makgeolli.

And so you drank, alcohol flowing freely between you all. You found yourself attracted by Sungwoon’s gravity, and you stood close to him, while Jimin and Hoseok talked about their current projects at the kitchen table. In any other situation, you would have been uncomfortable – you barely even were comfortable with Hoseok, even though he was Jimin’s friend you had spent the most time with – but Sungwoon had a calm aura surrounding him, and you quite enjoyed it. Or maybe it was because Jimin was in the vicinity of you, and you always felt comfortable around him.

“So, your mom is a famous actress, right?” Sungwoon asked as he was leaning against the island in Jimin’s kitchen. One of his arms was folded on his chest, while the other held up the beer he was currently drinking, though you could see the bottle was almost empty.

You nodded, a slight blush creeping on your cheeks. If it wasn’t for the alcohol, you probably wouldn’t have found anything to reply, but you found yourself saying, “It’s not as impressive as it seems”.

Sungwoon chuckled, and you gazed at his smile. At the plump lips that he wet with a dart of his tongue, and that glistened in the light as he spoke again. “Right. And yet you found yourself escaping to the other side of the world.”

It was said on a teasing tone, and though your thoughts threatened to diverge towards Collin, you stopped their course before they reached destination. “I’ve always wanted to get out of my comfort zone.”

“I hope it worked.” His words were accompanied by the upward curve of his lips, and your eyes dipped to them again. His mouth reminded you of another’s mouth, and you found your gaze trailing toward where Jimin and Hoseok were sitting, at the kitchen table.

Jimin caught your eyes, his expression softening into one you hadn’t really seen on his features before. Blood rushed to your cheeks, for a reason you didn’t quite know, and you resumed your attention on Sungwoon.

“Trust me, it did.” And even though Jimin wasn’t in your line of sight anymore, he had invaded your thoughts as you had spoken the truth.

Sungwoon maintained the conversation for a while longer, as you were all too aware of Jimin’s presence in the room. You liked to tell yourself that it was reciprocated, because each time you glanced at him, he was already looking. Until he and Hoseok got up from their spot at the table, making their way to Sungwoon and you.

“Do you two want to go to Taehyung’s party?” Jimin asked as he stopped next to you.

Right, he had talked to you about that party a while ago, and you had said you’d rather stay home, which Jimin had agreed to. But that was before Hoseok had decided to come hang out with you before heading to the party. It seemed the frenzy that inhabited the young man had slowly infected Jimin, because he had an expectant look in his eyes, his lips forming a small begging pout.

You chuckled, blushing, as you avoided his pleading features. “I already told you I don’t really do parties like that.”

Sungwoon let out a small teasing tsk. “Didn’t you say you like getting out of your comfort zone?”

You were about to reply that hanging out with celebrities all the time was already enough getting out of your comfort zone when Jimin gently nudged you with his elbow.

“She’ll say yes, she can’t resist me.”

His words had sounded… somewhat possessive. As if he knew you better than anyone in the world, even though your friendship was fairly new. It struck you, just how little time mattered when you developed a true relationship with someone, no matter how platonic it was.

The worst part of it all was that he was right, in some sort of way. You found it hard to say no to him, but then again you were pretty sure most of the human population would find it hard to say no to Park Jimin.

“Well, I’m getting tired”, you lied, because in truth the alcohol had woken you up more than you had thought it possible, even if you hadn’t touched the makgeolli yet.

Jimin had a devilish smirk on his lips once you finally looked back at him again. “In that case let’s just go for an hour or two and then come home.”

Hoseok and Sungwoon’s gazes moved from Jimin to you, awaiting your reply.

“You say that, and then it’ll be seven am and you’ll be begging me to stay longer.”

He snorted. “I’d never beg you for anything, you know that.”

Immediately, his features once again softened into that small pout of his, and you punched him in the shoulder. 

“Asshole.”

He massaged the spot you had hit, shrugging a little. “I’ll make you some kimchi if we go.”

It was even harder to say no when the perspective of him making you kimchi was on the table. 

“The one you made in Run BTS?”

He nodded.

“I hate you.”

“Is that code word for yes?”

You rolled your eyes, though a smile was tugging at the corners of your lips. “Maybe. Figure it out.”

His expression turned puzzled, and you stole a quick look towards Sungwoon and Hoseok, who both had that same puzzled expression on their features, though it was mixed with awe. What for, you didn’t know.

“I will call a cab, then,” Jimin said, the end of his sentence going a little higher, as if it was a question more than a statement.

You nodded once, and relief flooded his gaze as he pulled out his phone. Next thing you knew, you were sitting between Jimin and Sungwoon on the backseat of the cab as you were making your way to Taehyung’s party, regretting your decision just a little. Not enough to want to head home, though.

One thing you hadn’t expected about Kim Taehyung was how weirdly extroverted he was. Not quite extroverted, but ready to throw a party in the comfort of his own place at any moment whatsoever. His parties were coveted by the celebrity scene of Seoul, though not many people were usually invited. No, Taehyung still had an intimate aura surrounding him, like he was a mystery no one could really quite decipher, and so intimate parties were more his thing.

Those parties came like a cycle, once every month if they weren’t too busy, and were usually attended by the members of BTS and a couple of other artists from Hybe. He had even started inviting the members of Blackpink and his Wooga squad, though that had been before you had started attending the parties.

In all truth, you had only gone to one, and you were still uncertain if it had been real or a product of your imagination. A lucid dream, if you will.

Tonight proved to be different, though you were taken aback by the crowd in Taehyung’s living room, illuminated by only a string of red LED lights. Jazz music was playing over the speakers in one corner, and people were mingling around, no inhibition left behind.

It was a good thing no cameras were allowed in, otherwise you were pretty sure the whole Korean entertainment industry would have gone through so much drama it would have crumbled to the ground.

A champagne fountain was in the corner of the room, glasses precariously piled one on top of the others. People stayed away from it, a man in a black tux giving the drink to the partiers, in a clear attempt to avoid an accident.

You slid your gaze to Jimin once you’d taken the room in, your eyes a little wide. Sungwoon and Hoseok had already disappeared into the crowd.

“You didn’t tell me there would be so many people”, you said through gritted teeth, right as you felt your anxiety spike through the roof.

Jimin had a sheepish look on his face, and he didn’t hold your gaze, his eyes dropping to the floor. “I honestly had no idea.” He pursed his lips, before nibbling on the bottom one. “We can head home if you want.”

Perhaps it was because you had already drunk enough for your mind to be clouded with alcohol, or maybe it was the apologetic expression on Jimin’s features, but you said, “Let’s stay for an hour and then leave”.

The sheepish expression melted into a smile. “Do you want me to get you champagne?”

Before you could reply, Hoseok came back, two glasses in hands. He handed them to you, and you thanked him, bowing your head, though you weren’t quite sure you felt like drinking more than you already had. You had never been that much of a heavy drinker after all.

“Tae says he’ll play the trumpet soon”, he informed you, right as he glanced over his shoulder.

Jimin took a sip of his glass, then seemed to reconsider his decision as he threw it back and downed it in one long gulp. You handed yours to him as he looked at you. He shook his head no, motioning for you to drink up. You scrunched up your nose, because quite frankly you had never liked champagne, but you downed the glass nonetheless.

Here’s to not getting plastered.

You scrunched up your nose in disgust as your throat burned with the bubbles of the golden liquid, and Jimin let out a childish laugh that had your heart melting in your chest. You glared at him, and he winked.

“Now let’s go party.”

You were about to say no when the music turned to an upbeat tempo, and he grabbed your hand to pull you into the crowd. You held onto the champagne flute for dear life as he led you to the middle of the living room, and when he turned around and started dancing, you just stood there awkwardly.

That made Jimin giggle harder, and he hid his face behind his hand as he laughed.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

You glared at him, eyes narrowing dangerously. “You know I don’t really dance in public.”

He grabbed the glass from your hand, and your eyes widened in surprise as he disappeared. You tried watching him through the crowd, but you were too small to see over the heads of the people surrounding you.

“Where’s Jimin?” a male voice said in your ear, startling you from its proximity.

It was Sungwoon.

“I don’t know”, you admitted. “I think he went to bring our glasses back to the pyramid.”

Sungwoon glanced in that direction, nodding once. “He’s heading back this way.”

You tried to catch a glimpse of your friend, but it proved to be useless.

“Do you like to dance?” Sungwoon asked, leaning closer again to speak in your ear, and your cheeks flushed red as his warm breath hit your ear and the smell of his cologne met your nose.

Clearly Jimin wasn’t the only man in the world that smelled too damn good for your sanity.

“Not really”, you admitted, and you wringed your hands together. “Not at all, actually.”

Before Sungwoon could say anything, Jimin reappeared. “What are you two doing?” he asked, and there was a slight strain to his voice.

Sungwoon straightened, stepping away from you. “Just talking.”

Jimin nodded, tight-lipped smile adorning his lips. You chuckled at the look on his face, and he stared you up and down, a sassy fist resting on his hip.

“What’s got you laughing?” he asked.

You tilted your head to the side. You. This whole situation, the champagne and the music. “Nothing.”

Jimin clearly didn’t believe you, as he stepped closer. “Well then, why don’t you dance for me?”

It was the way he said those last two words, so innocently and yet they were coated with velvet. It made you gasp a little, mouth falling open as you tried to find a smart-ass comment to reply, but came up short.

You didn’t have to glance to the side to realize Sungwoon was gone.

“I don’t dance”, you replied, blushing.

He smirked then, his eyes taking on a darkened shade in the red lights of the room. “I’ll show you.”

And he did. He did show you, with his hands guiding your hips as he pulled you against him, your backside flush against him. Maybe it was the alcohol, or the overall sensual atmosphere that had taken over Taehyung’s apartment, but you didn’t want to move away. Wanted to press yourself further into the solid wall that was Jimin behind you.

It was wrong, yet it felt oh so right.

You moved in unison for a while, as if you had done it many times before. As if grinding on Jimin was a common occurrence to you, the girl that had never grinded on anyone before. Jimin kept speaking in your ear, tone still friendly even with the proximity, as if the dance meant nothing.

And though you tried to convince yourself that it didn’t, you found your heart didn’t really want to believe it.

“See, you’re not so bad”, Jimin encouraged you, hot breath tickling the side of your face.

You snorted, trying not to think about his hands guiding your hips. “You’re doing all the work.”

He chuckled, before spinning you around. His hands still were on your hips, but the movement had somehow put a little distance between you, enough so that you didn’t feel uncomfortable with his proximity.

Scratch that, you felt uncomfortable with how far he suddenly was.

“Give yourself some credit, Y/n”, he said with a light chuckle. “You’re a natural.”

You knew that you in fact were anything but a natural, but you still offered him a lopsided smile. He replied with a grin of his own, one that held nothing but that friendly warmth that had been inhabiting him since the night you had broken down at his place.

You wondered what would have happened if you hadn’t tried getting into his apartment, that day. You were almost convinced you wouldn’t be friends now. You liked to tell yourself he’d have warm up to you still, but there was no way to know, and it wasn’t a parallel universe you wished to live in.

“I think Tae’s going to play the trumpet now”, Jimin said, and he let go of your hips as the music stopped.

You almost wished he hadn’t, but then again it was better for your sanity that way.

“He is so random”, you mumbled and you watched Tae as he stepped on the couch, indeed holding his trumpet.

Jimin laughed, nodding eagerly. “He is. That’s why we love him.”

You glanced at Jimin then, and it endeared you, how he looked at Tae. With a small warm smile, eyes creased at the corners with the fondness they held. It struck you then – that was how he had been looking at you earlier.

With fondness, and maybe even a little surprise. As if he hadn’t expected to be looking at you like that one day.

You truly had changed, hadn’t you? From strangers to close friends... it was the most beautiful thing in life.

Taehyung started playing the trumpet, catching your attention, and you watched the show as he free-styled some jazz music – all jazz music felt free-styled to you. He stopped once in a while, to take a breath or to let out a giggle at someone’s comment or cheer, his boxy smile on display whenever he looked at the crowd of his friends.

You found yourself gazing at Jimin, too. He wasn’t looking at you, or whenever you looked he turned his head away, as if pretending he hadn’t been looking in the first place. It was cute, and so like Jimin that you found yourself giggling a little, blush creeping on your cheeks, the fifth time you almost caught him looking.

He leaned closer to you, a crease appearing between his brows. “What are you giggling about?”

You. Your thoughts had followed that train earlier, and this time they won. “About you.”

He squinted his eyes, a pout forming on his lips. “What?”

You shushed him, nodding towards Taehyung. “It’s impolite to talk during a show”, you whispered, and he glared at you, though the corners of his lips were tugging upwards.

“Sorry, sorry.”

It just made you smile wider than you already were, as your eyes trailed back to Taehyung.

Soon enough, the young man finished is little performance, in a fit of laughter that was mostly shared by his Wooga squad, as they had been the closest to him. Whatever they had been joking about seemed to be quite funny, and you felt your heart warm in your chest.

It often did, when you saw just how happy your favourite idols were, in their natural habitat. Indeed, it was quite hard to forget you had been a big BTS fan, and really, you just wished all of them would be happy.

They were, though they were humans, and they too had their up-and-downs. You knew that more than anything, now.

It was well past 2 am when you and Jimin stumbled back home, and you didn’t even have to talk about it for you to follow Jimin into his apartment. You settled on the couch, minds still buzzing with the afterglow of the revelry the night had entailed.

You often did that – sleep overs, that is. You hadn’t stepped into his room since the dreaded night though, and you usually slept on the couch. Most times he stayed with you, though you both slept at an extremity of the couch, far enough not to touch.

So you settled on your sides, cozying up in blankets Jimin had fished in his room, and you leaned your head against the couch as Jimin looked at his phone.

The glow of the screen caressed his features gently, high-lighting the red his cheeks had taken after the alcohol had fully reached his system. He was pouting a little, as he often did when he focused on something, and it took him a moment to realize you were staring at him.

“Are you okay?” he asked once his eyes finally met yours.

You almost said that you had never been more okay in your life, but it felt like it was a lie. You had been feeling like that for weeks now, all thanks to the friendship he offered you.

“I told you we’d be coming home late”, you said as you held in a yawn.

He pursed his lips, shrugging his shoulders. “You said 7 am, and it’s not even 3 am yet.”

You chuckled. “I’m surprised I enjoyed the party that much”, you admitted, face falling serious as your eyes lost their focus on him, images of the night coming back to your mind. “Taehyung is really good at throwing parties.”

“The best”, Jimin agreed. “He even got you to dance to That That.”

You laughed, and then winced. “That was embarrassing.”

He echoed your laugh with one of his own, giggling and childish and really too cute for your own good. “I have to agree that Jungkook stole the show.”

“Doesn’t he always?” you asked, sighing dramatically.

Jimin nodded, and this time you stayed silent, as he looked at his phone again. Until a mischievous smirk moved on his lips, and you only understood why when the song started playing.

He shot to his feet, holding out a hand to pull you to a stand too.

“What are you doing?” you asked, brows knitting together as you grabbed his hand carefully.

“If you dance it now, you’d be the one stealing the show.”

You barked out a laugh that was anything but lady-like as he pulled you up. “Bitch, you’re the better dancer here.”

He shrugged again. “I won’t be dancing.”

And as if he wanted to convince you that he indeed wouldn’t, he sat back on the couch, manspreading just a little too much. Which had your eyes looking down at his lap, and you would have gouged your eyeballs out for the treachery to your heart that it was.

“That’s not fair”, you said, cheeks burning. “I won’t dance for you.”

“Then say goodbye to your kimchi.” He crossed his arm on his chest, one eyebrow cocked sassily.

“I hate you”, you mumbled, right as the chorus of the song came around.

You folded though, and you danced to the choreography, missing the beat by a little. You didn’t really care, as Jimin just started laughing, and you followed him, stopping in the middle of the dance.

“Aishi, that’s embarrassing”, you whined, hiding your face in your hands.

You heard the rustle of clothes, and you froze as Jimin gently grabbed your wrists, pulling your hands away from your face. He was standing close, though the only part of him that was touching you was his palms.

Until his lips pressed against yours, and your eyes widened in surprise. You took a step back, and Jimin looked at you with that same startled look on his face.

“What did you just do?” you asked, heart beating out of your chest.

He wet his lips, and his features turned apologetic. “I kissed you.”

Now, there were many moments you could point out as having shaped your life. The moment you had decided to move to Korea, that last call with Collin, the moment Jimin had opened his door to you and you had stepped into his apartment, into his life. The day you had graduated college, and before that, the day you had graduated high school. Small moments – big moments, maybe – that had formed the mosaic of your past, and shaped you into being who you were today, into being where you were today. And maybe that was it: they had been slowly forming the mosaic of this moment with Jimin, if you chose to let him in.

And just like the sun hitting the mosaic at the perfect angle, you knew you couldn’t step away.

“Do it again”, you said, breathlessly, and a hundred emotions seemed to move in Jimin’s gaze before he grabbed your face, pulling you into the kiss.

You exploded with colors, bright and warm like an early fall afternoon, and you kissed him back, your hands resting flat against his chest, feeling the quick beat of his heart under your right palm. Your left hand slid up to the nape of his neck as one of his moved to your waist, pulling you ever so closer, right as he tilted his head to the side to deepen the kiss.

Park Jimin was definitely the best kiss you had ever had in your life. As if all the ones before him had been amateurs, and he was a professional in the arts of love. And maybe he was, or he just had far more experience than you did. Or perhaps it was just that you had been waiting for him all this time, and he for you.

Jimin gently bit at your bottom lip, tongue darting out to soothe the ache as a breathy sound fell from your mouth, only to be swallowed by his. It seemed to do something to him, that sound, because next thing you knew he was pulling you closer to the couch.

He sat as soon as the back of his legs hit the furniture, once again manspreading, and this time you climbed on the throne that was his lap, straddling him. You joined your lips again, sealing the deal. Because that was what it felt like – as if you were making a deal with the devil.

Jimin was too good to be true, and too good to be yours.

The thought sparked some sense in your lust-filled mind, and you pulled away, breathing heavily as your gaze met his. He looked startled, lips a little swollen by the ministration of your mouth against his. By the fact you had been kissing, lost in the moment, just a few seconds ago.

Your hands were on his shoulders, and you pushed yourself away, until you were standing and there finally was a healthy distance between you.

“I…” you breathed and your eyes fell to his mouth, before going back to his gaze. To the shadows that were now moving in front of the sun, and you wished you could take it back.

Take the last two minutes back, and forget that you had ever kissed.

“I should go home”, you muttered.

He didn’t try to stop you. Didn’t even say anything, as if he was struck dumb by what you had just done. Maybe you were too, and maybe that explained the panic that was slowly settling into your blood, into your entire being.

What had you just done?

 ***

                 It had been a few weeks, since Taehyung’s party, and whatever had happened after that. You had tried not to think about it, had pretended it had never happened… and so had Jimin. He had shown up on your doorstep the next morning, with hangover soup, and he hadn’t mentioned anything. Had only offered you a warm friendly smile as you had just stared at him for a moment, until he had joked about you looking like a fish out of water, and that had been that.

You hadn’t mentioned it once, falling back into your usual friendship, with a safe distance that felt a little wider now. Probably because at night you still somehow remembered how little distance there had been between you, on his couch, and how much of his body you had been touching. Not that you had touched a lot… it just felt like you had.

Fortunately, it was easy, to be friends with Jimin. Had been for a while now, and you would forever be thankful that it still was after the little bump in the road that you had encountered. Though you sometimes caught the shadows in his eyes, clouds that you had imagined had scattered away after you had grown closer…

They never lingered. He smiled, and they left, as his gaze turned warm with that same fondness and friendliness and overall kind light that they always held. You liked to tell yourself that you knew enough to be able to tell if it was faked, but in reality, you couldn’t really. Maybe you just wanted to believe it to be the truth.

You had shattered the mosaic of you, as you had stepped away that night, but it was hard to convince yourself that you hadn’t done the right thing. He was Park Jimin, and you were no one. No one compared to him, and compared to the people that were part of his day-to-day life. You doubted there was a universe out there where it made sense for you and him to be together like that. And really, your friendship was enough for you, and you were perfectly happy and content keeping it the way that it was. It was a different mosaic, one that held more blues and lilacs and yellows, but they formed a work of art still worth looking at, for all the missing red that it held.

October came with chill winds and bright leaves, the color of autumn creating a beautiful landscape of their own. Jimin invited you to Busan, for the concert that was long awaited by Army. He had everything arranged for you so you wouldn’t have to worry about anything, everything down to the hotel room and the food that you’d eat. You were thankful for it, even though you could have easily paid for it all. It showed just how good of a friend Jimin was. He even organized a dinner with his family and some of the members, two days after the concert, saying that he wanted his family to meet you, as you were the person he spent the most time with now.

You were excited, for the dinner. Anxious, but excited nonetheless, as you couldn’t wait to see Jimin in the most natural setting that was his. Because Seoul never really felt natural with him. It rather was surreal, painted in a light you had never thought you’d see.

Hoseok and Jin ended up being the two only members to come to the dinner, and you sat with them, as Jimin helped his mother in the kitchen even though she had insisted she didn’t need any help. His father was supposed to come later, and it was unclear if his brother would be able to make it. It didn’t dim Jimin’s joy though, and he beamed as he moved around the kitchen with his mother.

His mother had been sweet, as Jimin had introduced you to the older lady when you had arrived at his childhood home. You could see that Jimin had her smile, though it seemed the woman’s smile was rarer than her son’s. Or maybe she was just cautious around you.

It reminded you that you were a foreigner, and that there was more than just a single world between you and Jimin. Not only was he an idol, but he was Korean, and you weren’t. It was simple, but you truly didn’t belong to the same universe. And you were okay with it – you had more stories to tell each other, from your respective universes. From your respective mosaics, that met at the edges in those shades of lilac and blue and yellow. It just wasn’t made to become one mosaic. You were two individual pieces, and it was to remain like that.

Yet, you couldn’t help but gaze at him, every once in a while. Each time you caught him already looking at you, and he offered you a cute grin, the one that had his eyes crinkling at the corners. It made your heart stutter in your chest, just a little, and you cursed at it, repeatedly.

It didn’t matter that Park Jimin had kissed you, once. You were just friends, and you hated that you sometimes felt like that about him. Like what you didn’t know… you just knew that you shouldn’t be feeling anything at all. Because he was Jimin, yes, but mostly because of Collin.

You weren’t ready to dive into anything right now. Doubted you’d ever be ready, after having been broken like you had been.

“Y/n!” Hoseok called your name, and you blinked a few times, focusing on reality. On the conversation the two men had been having, though you hadn’t listened to a single word of it.

“Uh?” you let out.

Jin had a smirk on his lips. “See, I told you.”

You furrowed your brows as they exchanged a knowing look. “What are you two going on about?”

Hoseok shrugged, running a hand through his hair. His hand then landed on the table, and your eyes dipped to the painted nails that adorned his fingers, before going back to his face.

“You two are weird”, you muttered, and then blushed as you realized what you had said. Though they just laughed, and you sighed in relief.

A little tiny part of you still felt really uncomfortable around BTS. Even if you had met all the members on more than one occasion. To be fair, Jin was the one you knew the less, but it helped that Hoseok was the one you were closest to. Besides Jimin, obviously. Yet you wouldn’t even dare call Hoseok a friend. He was just an acquaintance, at best.

“Why don’t you go help Jimin?” Jin asked, and he let out one of his iconic laughs as Hoseok punched him in the shoulder.

Your eyes trailed to Jimin, and you could see he was talking with his mother. Whatever they were talking about, it looked to be way too personal for you to want to step in.

“I…” you let out.

“You’re going to make her uncomfortable”, Hoseok said, chuckling. “Leave the poor girl alone.”

“Shut it, you agree with me anyway.” Jin punctuated his words with a small wink, that left you even more confused than you already were.

“What is going on?” you asked, cheeks starting to burn with embarrassment.

“We were saying that… Ow!” Jin yelped.

Hoseok had kicked him under the table. Yet it didn’t deter Jin, just made his shit-eating grin grow wider.

“What do you think about Jimin?” he asked, cocking his head to the side as he folded his arms on his chest.

If you hadn’t already been blushing, you were pretty sure you’d have turn beet red. Scratch that – you were pretty sure your blush had deepened so much you had turned purple.

“What…” you let out. “I…” You threw a look toward the man in question, who was still very much so engaged in a conversation with his mother, unaware of what was happening just a few meters away.

“You don’t have to reply”, Hoseok told you gently, offering you salvation.

Maybe you were stupid for not accepting it. “He’s a good friend.”

Jin’s grin faded into a knowing smile. “Friend?”

You gulped under his inquisitive gaze. “Why do you want to know?” you asked with a small voice.

“Because.” He glared at Hoseok as the young man threw him a warning glance. “You two have been spending a lot of time together, haven’t you?”

You couldn’t really deny that, so you just remained silent.

“They are neighbors, of course they have”, Hoseok replied instead.

Jin chuckled, finally nodding his head. “Right. Still, they might need help over there.”

“Just go yourself”, Hoseok said, rolling his eyes before laughing. “Leave Y/n alone.”

It was sweet, how Hoseok was trying to get Jin off your back, but you did actually feel like Jimin might need some rescuing from his mother.

Indeed, even if his back was turned to you, and his moon tattoo was the only thing you could really see, you could tell he had stiffened. And maybe it was wrong for you to feel like interrupting, but you just wanted to help your friend, right?

“It’s okay, I can ask if they need any help”, you said, pushing up to your feet.

Hoseok and Jin looked at you, the latter failing at keeping the shit-eating grin in. You couldn’t help but chuckle, though it mostly was because you were embarrassed.

Embarrassed and anxious, and probably still blushing like crazy.

You walked towards the kitchen, taking a deep breath to calm down, and to also push away the thoughts that were intrusively taking over your mind.

You weren’t stupid, and you were very much so aware of what Jin had been implying. And though Jin was right, to have a doubt about you and Jimin, he also was wrong. Because you were just you, and nothing more.

“I’m serious, Jimin-ie.” His mother’s words drifted to you, as Jin and Hoseok’s voices slowly faded in the background. “You shouldn’t be dating someone like her.”

You stopped, eyes widening.

“We are not dating, eoma.” Jimin scoffed, shaking his head. “We are just friends.”

It sounded bitter, so bitter you felt your heart clenching in your chest.

“Good, then. I’m sure she is sweet, but you shouldn’t be with someone…” Jimin’s mother trailed off, as her eyes met yours over Jimin’s shoulder. Her face changed, turning from that cold stern look she had been sporting a fraction of a second ago to a warm smile that even reached her eyes, making them crinkle in that same way Jimin’s eyes crinkled.

Jimin looked over his shoulder, not quite meeting your gaze, before looking back at his mother.

“Please don’t tell me what to do with my life.”

His voice was low, barely above a whisper, really, but you had moved closer, your steps carrying you even when your heart had stopped a few meters away. You forced your face to melt into a smile, and you really hoped it reached your eyes.

“Do you need any help with the food?” you asked, as you stopped next to Jimin. You didn’t look at him, instead focusing on his mother.

The woman slightly tilted her head to the side, before glancing at the array of food on the kitchen counter. “I’ve got it covered, thank you for offering, dear.”

You nodded, finally risking a glance at Jimin. He hadn’t looked away from his mother, and his profile was set in a harsh expression, one you recognized as the one he had offered you in those first few weeks after you had moved. It was almost startling, to see it on his pretty features right now, but you didn’t shy away from it.

He was right, you were just friends. Even though a part of you hurt at the thought that his mother wouldn’t approve of you, it didn’t change the fact that you were just friends. Had become friends by a weird twist of fate, that was true, but it was nothing more than that.

Yet, to have two people questioning you about the relationship that you shared in less than five minutes… it was scary. And it threatened the peaceful friendliness that you had been sharing since that kiss. Threatening to push it off the edge of a cliff, and you weren’t quite sure the fall would be for the better.

Jimin’s jaw was clenched, a muscle ticking under his skin, and as his mother turned, you brushed your hand against the tight fist that was hanging at his side, in an attempt to calm him down. To your surprise, his fist loosened, and half a beat later he brushed your hand too.

It brought you back to that kiss, and you pulled your hand away instinctively. He only then glanced at you, and you gulped at the sight of the shadows in his eyes. He looked troubled, haunted even, and even though he wasn’t clenching his jaw anymore, his lips were pulled into a straight line.

You breathed in, shakily, and tried to offer him a reassuring smile. You weren’t quite sure you had succeeded, even as the corners of his lips slightly tugged upwards too. The shadows didn’t really leave his gaze, and you found you couldn’t hold his eyes anymore.

Maybe that made you a coward.

 ***

                 You sighed as you took in the thin mat Jimin’s mother had placed on the floor of his father’s office, for you to sleep on. You had thanked the woman profusely still, even though a part of you was angered, at the thought that she had said what she had said to Jimin. You had tried to let it go, had tried to let go what Jin had said too, but some part of you had been struggling, grasping onto the last thread of the conversation, refusing to let it fall into silence.

Perhaps it was because Jimin’s attitude had changed, after that. He hadn’t quite smiled as he usually did, had barely joked around with his family and friends. He had instead brooded in a corner, and even Hoseok and Jin hadn’t been able to shake him out of the dark state of mind that had taken over him.

You felt guilty. Though you hadn’t quite been the culprit, hadn’t you? Except for that night when you had kissed him and imagined you could share something more than friendship…

You had been fools, the two of you.

“Y/n”, Jimin said from the doorway, and you spun around, slightly startled.

He was beautiful, in the simple pajamas he had brought for the trip. He still was wearing his earrings, and they dangled from his ears as he leaned against the doorframe, hands in the pocket of his pants.

“Hey”, you let out, eyes shying from his, falling to the floor.

An awkward silence moved around you, filling the already warm room with an uncomfortable heat that pressed down on you.

“I have to apologize”, Jimin murmured, and your eyes shot to his face.

He wasn’t looking at you anymore.

“For thinking that this dinner was a good idea.”

You didn’t like the way a sharp pain cut through your heart. Hated it, loathed it, and wished it had never reached your heart.

“The dinner was fine”, you said with a small voice.

Jimin chuckled, and it once again sounded bitter. “I know you heard what my mother said.” He scoffed a little then, before adding, “I know Jin-hyung also said something to you. He kept apologizing for it, when they left. He thought that was the reason why I’ve been upset.”

You were stuck in silence, even though you wanted to say something, anything, to reassure him. It felt as if the shadows in Jimin’s eyes were slowly taking over the whole place surrounding you.

“It wasn’t, if you were wondering”, he said after a moment, finally meeting your gaze again. Holding it was the hardest thing you had ever had to do.

“What’s wrong, Jimin?” you asked. Your voice was tiny, so tiny you wanted to disappear through the floor.

He clenched his jaw, lips pressing into a thin line, much like they had earlier. “We should have talked, about that night.”

You wanted to pretend you didn’t know what he was talking about, but it would have been useless.

“It didn’t mean anything”, you whispered.

He breathed in, his shoulders moving up a little, before falling back down into their previous position. A little lower, maybe.  It made him look defeated, and oh so tired.

“I know.” He shut his eyes, sighing once again. “I’m sorry it happened.”

Your heart squeezed a little more in your chest, making it hard for you to breathe. “It’s okay, Jimin, I never was angry at you. We were both just drunk.”

He nodded, slowly, eyes still closed. “Yeah.”

The silence that fell around you then was different. Colder, and you found yourself shivering despite the previous heat.

“Well”, he let out, pushing up from the doorframe, his eyelids finally fluttering open. “I’ll let you go to bed.”

He made to turn away, and you found yourself blinking back tears. “We’re good, right?”

You didn’t know why you had asked. Only knew that fear had taken a hold of you, much like it had in a parallel night to this one, when Collin had broken up with you. Maybe you were looking for reassurance, or maybe you were just afraid to face the truth.

Because it did feel like there was a finality in the way Jimin was carrying himself.

“Of course”, he said, nodding slowly once again. “Of course we are.”

“Good”, you quickly said, scanning his features, trying to get him to look at you, because you knew his eyes never lied. “I’m glad we are.”

“Me too”, he whispered.

But he hadn’t met your gaze.

He hadn’t met your gaze.

 ***

               Waking up the next morning felt wrong, as if the sun had risen in the west instead of the east. As if rain was going up instead of down, and as if the stars had gone black. It was strange, to have the grief of losing Collin hitting you that hard, so long after the events. It had been months, now, yet it was just hitting you how alone you felt.

You refused to think that it had something to do with your conversation with Jimin last night. You had just stated a simple truth, one that you had to learn to live with. But why did it feel like such a lie, then?

Maybe because it was, and the night you had kissed had changed everything. You had been a fool to believe it hadn’t affected your friendship. You were pretty sure it had ruined it, like the final scene of a movie, where the main character dies for no other purpose than shocking the watcher. It had put a finality, to you, and to a story that could have been beautiful.

You got up from the sleeping mat, feeling as if you were being crushed under the weight of your heart.

“Good morning, Y/n”, a voice said from the doorframe.

You turned around, slower than you had the night before, in that same setting. Except this time, it wasn’t Jimin, but his mother.

“Jimin wanted me to tell you that he had to go back to Seoul early, but he’s had a car come to get you.”

Really, the world was spinning off its axis now. Because the friend you had known in the last few months would have never left you behind, no matter the reason.

“Thank you for letting me know”, you said, eyes falling to a spot on the floor.

“There is some breakfast for you”, his mother said, unaware of the way your heart was breaking, “if you’d like to eat before leaving.”

Now, the perspective of eating a breakfast cooked by Jimin’s mother reassured you, somehow. Maybe because the woman’s food was outstanding, as you had been able to see for yourself the night before.

You nodded, offering the woman a small smile. “That sounds lovely.”

The older lady smiled back, before indicating that she’d be waiting in the kitchen. And that was how you found yourself sitting in front of her, over more food than you’d ever be able to eat so early in the morning, though everything looked delicious.

It was awkward, to be sitting there, when some part of you was aching at the thought of Jimin. His mother offered you a light conversation, asking questions about where you were from, and what you did for a living. Nothing really intrusive, and really, if she hadn’t told anything to Jimin last night, you would have even thought she liked you.

You weren’t stupid, though, and you could hear the disapproving silence that stretched between the woman’s sentences.

“And how did you meet Jimin?” she suddenly asked, after having sipped on her tea. “He never really told me anything other than that time you visited the condominium.”

You froze, food halfway to your mouth. “What?”

The lady smiled, letting out a small chuckle. “He mentioned you, last February. Said a pretty girl and her boyfriend were going to move in next door.”

Silence. That was all that your mind was able to produce after the lady’s revelation. It seemed to dim her light mood because her smile fell, and a worried creased appeared between her brows.

“Is something wrong?” she asked.

You shook out of your trance, putting down the food in the plate in front of you. “No”, you murmured, eyes falling down a second after the food.

You hadn’t known. Jimin had never mentioned… that he had seen you, too, the day he had met Collin. You had barely ever spoken about it, Collin a foreign territory when it came to conversation between you. But he had admitted he had seen Collin, in that hallway between your apartments.

Why hadn’t he told you? How had you been so close to him, back then, without even knowing?

You doubted you’d ever be able to be close to him without knowing again. You were too… aware of him now that you had gotten to know him. Now that you knew his lips molded yours perfectly…

“He didn’t tell me”, you finally admitted, as Jimin’s mother still was looking at you pointedly.

Said a pretty girl and her boyfriend were going to move next door.

“Oh”, his mother let out. “But you have gotten close, haven’t you?”

You swallowed the lump that had formed in your throat. You nodded, taking a deep breath to steel yourself. “We have. Couldn’t imagine my life without him now.”

Your words hung heavily, in the air between you and his mother. You wished you hadn’t spoken them, knowing that the lady disapproved of you, together. Not that you ever would be.

“He said the same thing”, his mother admitted. “I’m glad to know he has such a good friend living next door.”

Good friend. It hurt just a little more, to hear the woman calling you that, even if you had been trying to convince yourself about it for a while.

To convince yourself? Your heart stopped in your chest, only to begin again on an erratic beat, one that had you thinking you were going to die on the spot. Of course, you were developing feelings for Jimin.

You were a damn fool.

“Thank you”, you said, eyes getting lost in the space between you and her. You didn’t really know what you were thanking her for, not as the shock of the truth was still ringing through you.

Not when you for once failed at lying to yourself, like you’d been doing for so long.

It had never been about Collin. Had always been about Jimin, and the person that he was. The idol that he was. It had been about the fact that some dirty dark corner of your mind felt… inadequate, in his light. Felt like you were tainting him, with your ordinary self. He deserved someone like him, someone that shone, with purity and kindness and everything in between.

Someone whose smile could lit up the whole room. Someone who always had kind words for the people surrounding them, and who knew how to make light of any situation. Someone that was struggling with their own shadows, but never let them affect those surrounding them.

You weren’t quite sure you could be that person. Were actually quite convinced you weren’t that person at all. That, more than anything, made you realize that maybe, maybe your friendship had always been meant to end, in one way or another. And perhaps, perhaps it was better to put a stop to it before you went too far.

Why, then, did it feel like you had gone too far already?

Because, you told yourself. Because he kissed me, and I kissed him back, and he’s all I’ve been able to think about since then.

You had been wrong, for telling him that the kiss hadn’t meant anything. It had meant the whole world to you, had shown you a mosaic of you you had cherished, for those few seconds before you had shattered it. You had been the one to pull away, and to declare it to be a mistake.

Maybe, in some parallel universe, you wouldn’t have, and you’d be together now. It was a different mosaic, one you felt as if you were looking at through some tainted glass, but maybe you had made a mistake. Knowing Jimin, he had probably decided not to mention anything to respect your decision.

To not make you feel more uncomfortable than he had clearly believed you had been. It was stupid, really, because you hadn’t been uncomfortable, kissing him.

You had felt like you were coming home after a long day of work, to the coziness of the arms of the person you were meant to love.

A pretty girl and her boyfriend.

***

              Three raps, on his door.

Knock knock knock.

You had gone straight to his place, after coming home from Busan. It had been strange, to ride that car alone without him, especially as he had been the one to drive you to the city where he had grown up. He had been all you had been able to think about, for the hours between the two cities.

You were anxious, standing there in front of his place. Like you didn’t belong there, even if you had been in that exact spot many times before. It brought you back to that first time you had been there, struggling to get in thinking that it was your own home.

It took you a long time, standing there, to realize that he wasn’t going to open. So long your eyes fell down to the floor, and trailed to the place where you had cleaned his vomit, months ago.

A whole world ago.

You wished you could go back to that moment. Well, not exactly to the moment you’d been cleaning up after him, but to the days that had followed. You were pretty sure that, more than anything, had been the spark of your friendship. Otherwise, you doubted Jimin would have chosen to take care of you, that night you had stumbled in his home. God knew you would have never become friends if you hadn’t.

It took you an even longer time to give up standing there. To blink away the tears that had slowly brimmed your gaze, and to head home. Accepting your defeat.

It took you a few more days, to realize Jimin was gone. Had probably not even gone back to his place once, crashing at one of his friends’ instead. You could have texted Hoseok, to ask, but you chose not to.

As you had chosen to never contact Collin again, after he had called to tell you about Harper.

In those few days, that shone with Jimin’s absence, you found the children at work to be just a little harder to deal with, just a little harder to talk to. You found that the end of your days was just a little harsher to live through, especially as you rode that elevator where you had first met him. That felt so empty now that he was gone, though that stain on the carpet hadn’t moved. As if to say the world hadn’t changed, at all.

As if to say you were the only thing that had changed in this universe. You didn’t know if it was reassuring, or if it was making you feel worse. All you knew was that your nights were haunted with images of him, even though your days were empty with his reality.

It was like he had turned into a ghost.

“You should come with us”, Chaeyoung said from the doorframe of your class, startling you out of your thoughts.

She had invited you to hang out in Hongdae, along with her girlfriend and some of her other friends, later that night. You hadn’t decided if you were going to go yet, as if doing an activity other than work felt wrong.

Some part of you knew that it was because you were afraid to not be home when Jimin was going to come. Because you were convinced he’d come back. If there was one thing you knew about him, it was that no matter what, he’d always find his way to you.

Like that first moment you had stepped in the same elevator as him, and like the many times you had run into each other after that. He was bound to come home at some point, and you didn’t want to risk being away.

But it had been a few days, and he hadn’t come home. Or if he had, you had been at work, and you had missed him. Which you refused to believe had happened, because you refused to believe he was truly gone from your life.

Yet you hadn’t been able to text him, no matter how many times you had started writing him a text. You had written enough texts you could probably compose a poem with them all, but your story didn’t feel like poetry.

It rather felt like some broken pieces of ceramic, that could have been arranged into that mosaic you had glanced at, for a time, as you had kissed. Pieces of ceramic that had been lost in those few days of him being a ghost.

“I need to go home, but I can meet you there later?” you finally replied, glancing at your friend.

You hated the concerned look on Chaeyoung’s features, but you forced yourself to smile, trying to reassure the girl. Trying to convince her that everything was alright.

“As long as you don’t bail…” Chaeyoung trailed off, walking in to help you pick up the few toys that were still scattered around the floor. “I don’t know what happened, Y/n, but you look exhausted.”

You sighed. There was no way you’d be able to convince Chaeyoung you were fine.

“I am. I’ve been for a few days.”

“What happened?” the girl quickly asked, and the concern on her features doubled up.

You sighed, standing up from the place where you had been kneeling. You glanced around the room, trying to find the courage to speak the words that had been haunting you, but you couldn’t find it.

“I haven’t been sleeping well”, you instead chose to say.

Chaeyoung had a no-bullshit look on her face once you finally met her gaze. Surprisingly enough, she didn’t insist, instead shrugging her shoulders and offering you a reassuring smile.

“Well, if you think that getting out of the house for a time would help, I’d be happy to do something more laid back than walking around Hongdae.”

“Don’t cancel your plans for me”, you said, shaking your head as your eyes widened a little.

The last thing you wanted was for more people to be aware that you weren’t doing fine.

“My friends wouldn’t mind, they like you”, Chaeyoung replied, shrugging her shoulders again. “But if you feel like staying home, that is okay too.”

You pursed your lips, nodding slightly. “Thanks, Chaeyoung.” And you really were thankful, because you weren’t quite sure you’d be able to go out.

Were willing to try to get ready, but wanted to be able to bail if you needed to.

Even as you were getting ready, two hours later, sitting in front of the large mirror of your vanity, you still weren’t sure you were going to go. Putting some make-up on felt good, though, as it permitted you to focus on something other than the treacherous thoughts that always led back to Jimin.

To the whole world that was between you now, not because of who you were, but because it felt like the distance between you wasn’t one that could be crossed.

You had just finished applying blush to your cheeks when your doorbell rang, and you froze. Because you knew, then, that the distance had finally become smaller. Still big enough for your heart to ache, but at least the wait was over.

Because, who else would it be but Jimin? Only Chaeyoung knew where you lived, and the girl was currently at a restaurant with her girlfriend and her other friends.

You almost dropped the brush you were holding as you put it down, hands starting to shake as you pushed up to your feet. You left your phone face down on the vanity, before jogging to the door. Hating that you had chosen the room the farthest from your door for your dressing room.

It felt like an eternity, before you reached that door, and you were a little breathless when you threw it open.

Jimin stood there, hands buried in the pockets of his coat, hair a little tousled, as if he’d just tried to tame it, but failed to do so. He was wearing earrings, as he most always did, and the light caught on the silver of them as he looked up to meet your gaze. He too had dark circles under his eyes, ones that you had just hidden on your own face.

“Jimin”, you breathed.

His eyes were still haunted by those shadows, and they went a little wide as you held his gaze.

“Y/n.”

He said your name with a softness that made you feel weak all of a sudden, and you were pretty sure tears were welling up in your eyes.

“You’re an idiot”, you said, and you let out a small chuckle. “Where have you been?”

He swallowed, his Adam apple bobbing up and down.

“I needed time to think”, he replied.

You fell silent, as he looked at a spot over your shoulder, before letting his gaze drop to the floor. It took him a moment before meeting your eyes again, and you felt like dying at the sight of the dark clouds in his gaze.

“I… figured”, you murmured, gulping. “That’s why I didn’t text you.”

“Can I come in?” 

You nodded, stepping aside. He walked in, and you breathed in the smell of his cologne before gently closing the door behind him.

“I was… getting ready”, you told him, feeling suddenly very awkward.

At least you had successfully blinked the tears away.

“We can sit in my dressing room?”

Jimin nodded, though he hadn’t met your gaze since he had stepped into your home. He followed you, silent as a mute, and sat in front of the second vanity in the room.

The one in front of which Chaeyoung had gotten ready, all those months ago, the night you had gone clubbing. The night you had stumbled into Jimin’s apartment as if it was your own. The night that had started it all, come to think of it.

“Where are you going?” Jimin asked as you sat back where you had been a moment earlier.

Not feeling like lying, you let the truth come out. “Nowhere.” You paused, as a puzzled expression took over his features. “Now that you’re here”, you specified, and his lips spread into a thin line.

It looked like anything but a smile.

“You can still go, if you want”, he said, before chewing on the dry skin of his bottom lip.

You shook your head no. “I’ve missed you, Jimin. I’d rather stay with you.”

He looked so sad, as you spoke the words. And then it hit you, that he maybe didn’t want to be with you.

Maybe he was there to end your relationship, once and for all.

“I…” he fell silent, his eyes falling to the scattered brushes and make-up items on the vanity. “I missed you too.”

There were some tears in your eyes again, damn you.

“Where were you?” you breathed, eyes not moving from his features.

Engraving them in your memory, and in the mosaic of you.

“I’ve been staying with Hobi-hyung”, he admitted. “I’ve been thinking, about us.”

You audibly gulped this time.

“So have I”, you whispered, and he met your gaze.

“I don’t think we’re good, Y/n”, he declared, after a short silence that lasted for an eternity.

It broke your heart, and you found you couldn’t fight the tears now.

“Oh…”

He just watched you, for a time, as a few tears escaped your eyes.

“Why are you crying?” he asked, as if the sight of those tears on your cheeks was so foreign to him, as if they were a concept he had never understood in school.

“I talked to your mother, before leaving Busan”, you told him.

He remained silent, eyes never leaving yours.

“Why didn’t you tell me you saw me too, the day you met Collin?”

He didn’t move, for a time. Even looked as if he had stopped breathing. But then he let out a small broken sound – a chuckle, maybe.

“Because you would have thought me to be crazy.”

You dried your tears with the back of your hand. “Why would I have?”

He chuckled again, and this time it sounded a little realer. His eyes took on a distant expression, as he focused on the memories of that moment months ago. “Because you were standing with your back to me, in the kitchen. I was in the hallway, and all I could see was your hair. And then you turned to look at your boyfriend, and when I saw your face, I was just struck dumb.”

You didn’t even know when that had happened. Hadn’t seen him at all, standing there. And you were the one to be struck dumb now, at his confession. At the way his words echoed in your head until you felt drunk with them.

“I thought you were the prettiest girl I’d ever seen, and then you smiled at him and I assumed you were taken”, he continued. His eyes had met yours again, and you could see the truth they were shining with. “I felt strange, for a moment, and then Collin turned. He saw me, and he walked to the door, and shut it.”

A pretty girl and her boyfriend.

You remembered that. You had asked why Collin had shut the door, and he had just walked to you and kissed your forehead, before telling you to focus on what the realtor was saying.

“So, I went home”, he added. “And then when I saw you in the elevator, that day you were moving in, I assumed Collin was around. I felt awkward, because I thought he hated me.”

So, that was what it had been. It had never been about the Chimmy keychain or the mess of BTS albums, like you had believed at first. He had just thought you belonged to someone and hadn’t wanted to intrude in your relationship.

“And then I just felt uncomfortable around you, and I was a dick to you and I’m sorry I was. But when you tried getting into my apartment, and you told me what had happened, I just…”

He shrugged, and you only then noticed the silver brimming his gaze.

“I didn’t want to let you go, I guess. And you were fun to be with, so I tried to keep you around.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat, as tears rolled freely down your face. He looked at them, before meeting your gaze again.

“I don’t know when I fell in love with you”, he continued, and tears moved on his cheeks too. “I think I’ve always known I’d fall for you, and then one day I realized the feelings were already there. I knew you had recently come out of a relationship, so I didn’t say anything. But that night, I just lost it… Seeing you chat with Sungwoon, seeing him flirt with you, I just hated it.”

Sungwoon had been flirting with you? It hit you then: it was jealousy, that had made Jimin act the way that he had, those few weeks ago.

“And when we kissed, and you left, I thought ‘that is it, your friendship with her is over’”, he admitted, chuckling sadly again. “So, I decided to pretend nothing had happened, and when you did the same thing, I assumed we’d just never talk about it again, and I’d do everything I could to prevent it from happening again.”

You really had been fools.

“Eoma told me she could see the love in my eyes, while we were cooking, and that I was making a mistake, to fall in love with you.”

Your heart squeezed in your chest, and you choked on a sob.

“And maybe I should have told her then”, he added, getting up from his spot to come closer to you, grabbing your hands. “I’ve sacrificed so much to be where I am. I’ve sacrificed friendships and relationships and my own health.” He paused, as if he didn’t want you to be associated with all those shadows in his life. And you were glad he had, because his next words destroyed everything in you, only to build it anew. “I’m not willing to sacrifice you too.”

You got up, letting out a small sad laugh as Jimin smiled.

“I am in love with you, Y/n”, he breathed. “And I want to be with you.”

You blinked away a fresh wave of tears, and he let go of one of your hands, to wipe the tears from your face.

“I thought you were coming here to tell me we were done”, you admitted, and another tear rolled down his cheek.

He chuckled. “I thought so too. But you had to start crying and make me weak.”

His eyes were full of emotions you couldn’t quite interpret, yet you knew they echoed those in your own heart.

“I’ve been weak for you for so long”, you whispered, as you leaned in the hand he had kept against your face.

He laughed, just a little, as you reached to dry his cheek from the lone tear.

“I’ve been weak for you before I even met you.”

He laughed again, and the sound was healing, really.

“You were my bias, you know?” you let out. “But then when I met you, I started hating you, because I thought you were an entitled prick.”

He pursed his lips, holding in a smile.

“And then you took care of me that night, and you were just so friendly I thought you were a completely different person.”

You smiled softly at the memory, and at the warmth that it raised in you.

“You started talking to me, more, and you were so friendly and bubbly. I felt like I was in heaven, for a moment, and you helped me through the grief of Collin, and of him and his new family.”

You thought about it for a time, eyes falling to his neck as you lost your focus on his features.

“I think I saw you like my own little family, for a long time, because you were filling a hole in my chest. And then you started being more, and I started looking for you in every room I was in.”

Maybe you had already been in love with him, then.

“And when we kissed, I felt like it was meant to be”, you said. “Like you were the one I was meant to find. And I guess guilt crept in, about Collin, and I know it’s stupid, but I felt guilty, and I left.”

And it was true. Your thoughts hadn’t gone to Collin, but your body hadn’t recognized Jimin to be the body it was used to, back then, and it had made panic kick in.

“I regret leaving then”, you admitted. “I wish I hadn’t, and I wish I had stayed with you.”

You breathed in and out shakily, as the truth kept flowing out of your mouth.

“I want to be with you too. I’m afraid, because you are you and I am me and there is so many worlds between us.”

He grabbed your face then, ever so gently. Eyes gazing into yours with so much love and adoration you felt as if you could die right then, and die happy.

“I don’t care about any worlds between us”, he whispered. “I just want you.”

“I’ve fallen in love with you, Jimin”, you breathed, and he pressed his lips against yours.

It was terribly soft, that first kiss after the one weeks ago. Like he was scared to make you run again, and he just wanted to get a last taste of you. Without hurting you, like the way one graze their fingers against a flower. Ever so gently, lest the petals be spoiled.

But you weren’t a flower, and you didn’t want to be treated as such. Wanted the desperation that you had been drowning in for the last few days to finally flow out of you. So, you put the feelings in the kiss, letting your lips mesh with his harder, and he breathed out, his hands falling to your waist, pulling you closer.

He tasted salty, from the tears that had been rolling on his cheeks. He tasted of honey, too, a sweet taste that you knew you’d come to love more than anything. And his hands on your waist were warm, hot, and they pulled you ever so closer, until all of your body was pressed against all of his.

You snaked your hands between you, moving to unbutton his coat. He helped you, pulling away for half a second, just enough time to let the coat fall to the floor.

When his lips crashed on yours again, the rhythm of the kiss changed, becoming frantic, as if the desperation had hit him too, and he needed to feel you.

A breathy sound fell from your lips as his tongue met yours, and he made you turn your back towards the wall, pushing you back until your ass hit the vanity. He pulled you up on top of it, and you spread your legs to make space for him, grabbing the collar of his shirt to pull him back into the kiss.

It was heated, that kiss, so heated you thought you were about to burst into flames. Into flames and fireworks and softness, as if it was more the afterglow than the explosion. And it felt like that – like that feeling of awe fireworks leave in one’s heart.

As he kissed you, hands roaming along your thighs, along your waist, you found yourself seeing that mosaic again. The one you had thought you were seeing through tainted glass. Only this time, the mosaic took form in your universe, a sight so beautiful your soul felt full, like it was incomplete until you an Jimin had finally chosen each other. It was beautiful, really, with reds and oranges and purples, along with the blues and lilacs and yellows your friendship had consisted of.

It was so much more than whatever you had had with Collin. Collin had been in your life for a long time, yes, but your soul had never been his, the way that it was Jimin’s.

Jimin moved from your lips to your neck, as you were still clutching his collar. You let it go, fingers moving to run through his hair, pulling at it. He bit your neck, then, gently, but hard enough to elicit a soft moan from your mouth.

He went crazy at the sound. Hands moving underneath your shirt, caressing the skin of your waist, before moving up to your breasts. Heat pooled between your legs as he grinded into you, and you could feel his own arousal against you, the friction making you see stars.

You hadn’t had sex in a long time and perhaps that, more than the feeling of him against you, had you pull away slightly.

“Jimin”, you breathed.

He looked up from your neck, eyes glassy with lust, lips glossy and red and swollen from your ministrations. He seemed slightly scared for a time, until you grabbed his face and pecked his lips once.

That seemed to reassure him, and a soft smile lit up his features.

“Y/n”, he breathed, too, and you felt your heart swell in your chest, with the feelings that you had for him.

“I…” you trailed off, looking between his two eyes. Gazing at the love that was warming them, taking it in and making it yours.

He was yours, and you were his.

“Can we take our time?” you asked, gently. “I haven’t…”

His eyes widened slightly, and he made to pull away, though you kept him from getting too far by wrapping your legs around his waist.

“You’re a virgin?” he asked.

Laughter burst out of you. “What?”

He wasn’t smiling, and he just looked confused.

He was truly adorable.

“I just haven’t had sex in a long time”, you admitted.

And it was true. Even before you and Collin had broken up, you hadn’t really gotten physical. Since…

You didn’t let your heart ache, as you realized he hadn’t really gotten intimate with you again, after October. After he had cheated with Harper.

“Are you okay?” Jimin asked, concern moving in his gaze.

He must have been able to read the feelings on your face.

You nodded. “I am.” You paused, glancing down at his mouth. “Please kiss me again.”

His tongue darted out, to wet his lips. “I won’t be able to go slow, if you tell me stuff like that.”

You didn’t know where your confidence came from, but you let a smirk grow on your lips. “Oh, Jimin-ie… We have all night in front of us, you better take your time.”

A smirk grew on his own lips, as his eyes grew ten times darker. But still they shone from within, with a light you hoped would never leave. “You’re lucky I’ve got a great stamina.”

You snorted, and then blushed as embarrassment raised in your chest at how awkward the sound had been. Until Jimin pecked your nose, the flirtatiousness melting into soft warmth.

“You are so cute”, he breathed against your lips, before kissing you again.

The gentleness of the action made you blush even more, though you fled from the feeling behind it, biting at his lips.

He was goddamn Park Jimin, and you were just you.

The insecurity that it brought to you menaced to shatter the mosaic again, but he chased it away as he kissed you, with more heat than you thought you could handle, until your body caved in to his touch. It was easy then, to let your thoughts dissolve into nothingness, especially as he grinded into you again, and the length of his erection brushed against your clit.

You moaned, a full noise that sounded far too obscene. He swallowed it, his tongue diving in your mouth to meet yours, establishing a rhythm that promised to be a sweet treat to your body.

Your hands pulled at the hem of his shirt, even as you didn’t remember having slid them underneath it, needing to feel the warmth of his skin. He pulled away from the kiss, to take off the piece of clothing, and it met his coat on the floor as your eyes fell to his ‘Never mind’ tattoo. Your fingers gently ran over it, and your heart beat quicker in your chest.

You had never thought you’d be touching his tattoos so intimately one day. Would have called crazy whoever would have said that you were meant to be there, in that mosaic of you.

Your phone chose that moment to start buzzing next to you, startling you. Both your gazes fell to the device, and you stayed still for a time. Until you grabbed the phone, breathing raggedly as you noticed that it was Chaeyoung. You didn’t feel like picking up the call, so you sent your friend to voicemail.

“Let me just text her”, you mumbled, as Jimin’s gaze burned on your face.

He nodded, his hands remaining on your waist as you unlocked your phone, and informed Chaeyoung that you were busy with Jimin, and that you wouldn’t be able to make it tonight.

It was worth the shit-eating smirk that was on Jimin’s lips when you looked up.

“Busy, mmh?” he said, gaze heavy with lust and desire as he looked down at the little space between you.

You nodded, feeling a wave of confidence again. “Maybe we should actually get to work though.” You bit your lip, looking at Jimin through your eyelashes, in a way that you hoped was attractive.

It made you feel awkward, though it seemed to work on Jimin, because he swiftly pulled your shirt off, and you hoped he couldn’t tell the blush on your cheeks was from being embarrassed. Luckily enough for you, his eyes had dropped to your chest, and at the black lacy bralette you were wearing.

“Fuck”, he breathed out. He looked up, meeting your gaze. “You’re so beautiful.”

Now, you felt very shy. Too shy to have him looking at you still, so you grabbed his face and pulled him in for a kiss again. He kissed you sweetly, with his pretty swollen lips, grinding into you for one last time before he stepped back.

“Now, let’s get you out of these pants.”

You gulped, nodding yes because you were pretty sure your voice would have failed you. Jimin unbuttoned your pants, though he didn’t make to pull them down your legs yet. Instead, he let his hand move between your legs, fingers grazing at you through the fabric.

“You’re so hot”, he said, breathing hard.

You whined, as he pressed on your clit, skilled fingers finding it right away.

He smirked, then, male pride evident in his gaze at the sounds he was already coaxing out of you, before pulling your pants down your legs. He gazed at your clothed pussy, only your black panties separating you from his hungry eyes, and you wondered if he could already see the wetness pooling there.

You doubted you had ever been wet like that before, and you had barely even started.

Before moving closer to you again, Jimin unbuckled his belt, eyes boring through yours with an intensity you had never seen in their depths. It made the hotness between your legs burn achily.

His jeans fell to the ground, though he kept his underwear on. He stepped out of the fabric pooling around his ankles, and then moved back between your legs. You blushed as he grabbed your chin to make you look up.

You had been gazing at the imprint of his hard dick.

“Eyes up here, baby”, he said, smirking, before stealing another kiss, one that led to him pushing his erection against you again.

It felt better, now that less fabric laid between you, though it wasn’t enough. You wanted all of him, lest you’d go crazy. Jimin seemed to understand it, because one of his hands found its way between your legs, and he ran his fingers on your clothed pussy, and on the wetness that was seeping through your panties.

“Fuck, Y/n”, he growled, and really, his voice was so low it sounded animalistic. “You’re so fucking wet already.”

“Please”, you breathed, and he smirked.

Smirked and pulled away, eyes going down to your clothed self again.

“I want to taste you.”

“Do it”, you murmured, as he was already kneeling down.

He didn’t wait, didn’t take his time. He pulled your panties to the side, tongue lapping at your entrance, collecting your juices. You moaned, loudly, and your head threw back as your eyes fell shut. One of your hands moved to your breast, pinching at your erect nipple through the fabric, as Jimin started working on you.

If there was one thing that was true about Jimin, it was that he knew how to use his tongue. Indeed, he skillfully found your clit, pressing small circles on it, and before you could even realize it, he slid a finger inside of you, curling it to find that sweet spot that made you see stars.

You moaned, louder, one of your hands moving to his hair, as he established a quick rhythm that had your legs shaking with sensitivity. Soon enough, he buried another of his fingers inside of you, spreading you wide open, and you clenched your walls against him.

You wanted more, and you couldn’t keep your body from telling him.

He sucked on your clit, moaning against you, and this time your pussy clenched by itself, walls holding him tightly inside.

“Fuck”, he said against you, pulling away just enough to look up at you.

You met his gaze, your own half-lidded eyes lost in the bliss of the pleasure he was giving you, and he smirked, lips shining from your wetness, before diving right back in.

Whatever he had been doing before wasn’t even half of what he could do, because this time, his tongue pressed hard against you, moving quickly, eliciting obscene moans from you, sounds tangled with his name as he inched you closer and closer to your orgasm.

And right when it was about to hit, your walls already pulsing against him, Jimin pulled away, leaving you empty. Empty and aching with the denied orgasm.

“Didn’t you say you wanted to take your time?” he asked, teasingly, once your eyes opened to glare at him.

“Fuck”, was all you could mutter back.

Jimin pressed his lips against yours, and you sucked on his bottom lip, moaning at the taste of yourself that still was lingering on his mouth. His fingers were digging in your hips, the pain a slight warning at the back of your mind.

Though you threw the warning away, because it felt way too damn good. His digits didn’t linger there for long, moving up to rid you of your bralette, and his mouth fell to your breast, sucking on it as you moaned again. He looked up, continuing his ministrations against your erect nipple, and you met his gaze, your pussy clenching around nothing. Maybe Jimin could tell, because his fingers found their way back to your pussy, and soon enough he had taken off your panties, fingers pumping in and out of you so quickly you could feel yourself withering away.

You knew you’d be nothing once the orgasm would hit. So, you grabbed onto him, right as he moved his face up and buried it in your neck. You breathed your pleasure in the shell of his ears as his fingers moved in and out, wet pornographic sounds filling the whole room.

“You’re so fucking wet”, he said again, but you barely were able to register it.

You wanted to say yes, but all that you could let out was a broken sound as your orgasm hit you out of nowhere, leaving you to shake with the waves of pleasure that moved through you.

Jimin worked you through the orgasm, thumb moving against your clit as his fingers curled inside of you, and you blinked back tears to look at him, though his face was hung low, forehead against your shoulder. Once he had milked the last of your orgasm from you, he looked up, meeting your gaze.

He looked a little crazed, as if he was in pain, and you understood why as your hand found its way to his dick, palming him through the fabric of his underwear.

He was so hard it had to be painful.

“I want to taste you too”, you murmured, too fucked out to be embarrassed with your words.

He kissed you, wildly, before pulling away and resting his forehead against yours. “Later”, he said, and he breathed it out like a promise. “For now I just want to fuck you until you’re screaming my name again.”

You hadn’t been aware you were screaming his name in the first place, but you didn’t have time to say it before he pulled you to your feet, turning you around until he had you bending over the vanity. You watched him take off his underwear in the mirror, your pussy still pulsing a little. Next thing you knew he was burying himself inside of you, so hard your thighs hit the vanity, and you screamed a moan, right as he groaned.

He was bigger than you had expected, and the stretching burned, though he remained still, to give you time to adjust. Or maybe just that had been enough to bring him close to the edge, and he had to refrain from moving otherwise he’d come.

His hands were on your hips, and you risked another look in the mirror, knowing fully well he was already looking at you.

Seeing Park Jimin, right there, impaling you, almost was enough to make you come again.

“Don’t clench around me like that”, he grunted, and he sounded as if he was in pain.

His eyes fell shut, and he started moving inside of you, ever so slowly. Slowly inching out, until he pushed all the way in again. You moaned, and his fingers tightened on your skin, before one of his hands loosened its grip, to gently run against the skin of your back.

“I don’t want to hurt you”, he murmured.

Your words finally found you again. “You’re not hurting me.”

His eyes flashed open at the sound of your voice, and you found you couldn’t hold his gaze. Not when he was fucking into you as slowly as he was.

“How do you like it?” he asked, and he bent over to press a kiss on the back of your shoulder before straightening again.

It made you feel warm inside, a feeling that cut through the lust you were drowning in, only to disappear as he started pounding into you.

“Fast?” he asked, before slowing down. “Or like this?”

When you remained silent, Jimin slapped your ass, and you moaned his name.

“As much as I love hearing you say my name like that, you haven’t answered my question, haven’t you?”

You whimpered as he slapped your ass again. Not enough to hurt, but just enough for your skin to tingle with the sting. “I want you to feel good”, you replied.

He stilled inside of you. “Look at me.”

You hadn’t even realized you had shut your eyes. 

His gaze was soft when you met it. “No matter how we do it, I’ll feel good inside your tight pussy.”

It was crass, how he said the words, and it only turned you on even more.

“Then fuck me, Jimin”, you said, because really you couldn’t look at him any longer.

And so he did, pounding inside of you until he had you seeing stars, a second orgasm threatening to push you over the edge. You kept it in, knowing you’d be too ruined if you came again, especially as you were already turning sore. You wanted him to feel good before you’d let yourself go like that again.

His balls slapped against your clit as he fucked you, a strange music resonating in the room, and you held onto the sides of your vanity as he pushed harder and harder, your tits resting flat against the brushes and make-up items on the furniture. You could barely feel them there, your whole focus solely on the space between your legs, and the way he was moving inside of you, stretching you.

“You feel so good”, he praised you, and you moaned your agreement, which had him chuckling.

It felt so normal, so casual, that your heart swelled in your chest, tears moving in your gaze.

“I love you”, you breathed, unable to stop the words before they had moved out of your mouth.

He stopped pounding into you then, meeting your gaze, his own eyes creasing at the corners with fondness and love. “Y/n…”

You held his gaze for a time, until you found you couldn’t anymore. Your eyes fell shut, and you wondered if it was tears that were filling the space under your lids.

“Am I hurting you?” he asked, gently, once again bending to kiss your shoulder.

“You feel so good”, you said, echoing his previous words.

He hadn’t moved from your shoulder when he spoke again. “You look in pain.”

You weren’t in pain, honestly. You were just overwhelmed with your feelings for him, and you were too much of a coward to meet his gaze.

“I am not”, you promised. “Can we move to my room?”

The question felt appropriate, aimed to make him drop his concern. And it worked, as he pulled away, leaving you empty, and he pulled you up, wrapping his arms around your waist as he kissed the side of your neck.

You shivered, tilting your head to the side, allowing him to move up your skin until he was sucking on the spot bellow your ear.

“I love you too”, he murmured against you, before kissing the hickey he had just created on your skin.

Another piece of the mosaic that was yours.

You turned in his arms, then, pressing your lips against his, kissing him until you felt so drunk with him you couldn’t even remember your own name. He picked you up, your legs wrapping around his waist, lips still pressed against yours.

He took a few unsteady steps towards the exit of the room, before stopping as he chuckled in the kiss. The sound was sweet and innocent even though you were butt-naked and had just been fucking like there was no tomorrow. It made you love him even more, and you wrapped your arms around his neck tighter to hold him close to you.

You never wanted to be away from him again.

He pulled away from your lips, to look over your shoulder. “As much as I love kissing you, I’ll have to look where I’m going or we’ll both end up on the floor.”

You laughed then, an airy sound that didn’t even seem like it belonged to you. As he walked, you pressed your lips against the spot where his neck met his shoulder, his earring tickling your face as you sucked on the skin, giving him a hickey in return for the one he had just put on your own skin.

He hissed, hands tightening their grip on your ass, as he finally reached your room. He carried you to your bed, putting you down before straightening. You looked up at him, then, eyes full of love and desire. He grabbed your cheeks, thumbs brushing against your skin gently, before bending down to press a sweet kiss on your lips.

“Why don’t you make place for me, mmh?” he asked against your lips, before straightening and motioning to the pillows on the other side of the bed.

You obeyed, and soon enough Jimin was hovering over you, one hand holding him up as he kneeled between your legs, his erection resting against your pelvis.

“You are so beautiful”, he murmured again, and it sounded like a prayer, like you were the god to his religion.

It made you feel shy again, and your eyes shut, instinctively.

He brushed your cheek with his knuckles, ever so gently, coaxing you to open your eyes. Only you didn’t, your insecurity meeting you full force.

How could you be having sex with Park Jimin? You were no one and…

“Look at me, Y/n”, he said, murmuring the words against your lips.

He was so close you could feel his mouth moving against yours.

“You’re intimidating to look at”, you replied, truthfully.

That made him move away, far enough for his breath to be a ghost on your skin, barely even warm from the distance.

“What?” he let out.

“Why me?” you asked, then, as you truly wondered. It was hard to believe someone like Jimin wanted to be with someone like you.

“Y/n…” he breathed, and he pecked your forehead, a sweet act that was purely done out of his love for you.

A pretty girl and her boyfriend.

“Because to me, you’re the prettiest girl in the world. The only one I see, the only one I want, and the one I want to spend my life with.” He pecked your nose then, before pulling away again. “You’re the one I am in love with, and no girl will ever compare to you.” He pecked your lips. “No one can ever compare to you.”

You are the mosaic of my soul. 

It was the confirmation that you had needed, and your insecurity slowly dwindled away, replaced by the warmth he brought to your heart.

You made love then, gaze lost in each other’s, in the stars Jimin’s eyes held and the love you shared. The shadows had long left Jimin’s gaze, and they were shining, glowing with pure love and happiness, and desire. So much desire you truly felt like the prettiest girl in the world. 

You hoped his shadows and clouds would never come back. Promised yourself you wouldn’t let them come back, whatever it took.

Jimin moved slowly, inside of you, until you reached another orgasm, one that took its origin in that pure feeling you shared, an orgasm that had him toppling over the edge too, spilling inside of you.

And he stayed there, for a long time, gazing into your eyes. He had long gone soft when he pulled out, his seed spilling from you. He stayed close, pressing soft kisses on your cheeks and lips, until you were giggling and blushing.

“You are adorable”, he said, and you moved your hands to his ribs… tickling him.

He yelped, pulling away from you. “Traitor”, he said, between two laughs.

It made you laugh a little more, as he sat on the side of your bed.

It was a strange sight to see. A naked Park Jimin, in your bedroom. In the place where no one but you had ever been before. The place where no one but you two would be from now on.

You turned, lying on your belly, as you looked up at him. His eyes trailed on your body appreciatingly, landing on your ass.

“I knew you had a nice ass but, fuck, the real sight is much better than what I had anticipated”, he said, teasingly, before slapping your ass for emphasis and getting up.

“Hey!” you let out, laughing as he took a single step away, and your eyes fell to his own ass. “You’re one to talk, with the dump truck you’re carrying around.”

Jimin spun around, eyes wide as he met your gaze. You burst out laughing at the same time, and you felt warm and happy and complete.

There was no more beautiful feeling in this world.

“Come, let’s get cleaned up”, he said, offering you a hand to help you stand up.

Grabbing his extended hand felt like a promise. It felt like you had just finished making the mosaic of you, and you were finally ready to gaze at the whole piece of art.

It was a promise, that you’d be together, from now on until the end.

I want to be with you.

Jimin’s words echoed in your mind.

I want to be with you too.

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

AAAH. Thank you for reading me. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed building the story for these two. It was fun, though the beginning was excruciating to write. Hopefully it didn’t feel like that to read it!!

Let me know what you thought of the fic! Feedback is always appreciated, and a good source of motivation for writing more stories like that ;). I might also start a taglist so let me know if you want to be added to that!

Anyways, love you lots, thank you again for reading me <3

#park jimin #park jimin fanfic #park jimin smut #park jimin fluff #park jimin angst #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin fic #park jimin x reader #park jimin x you #bts pjm #pjm x reader #i want to be with you

[kay-diggle]

A Second Experience

Summary: Y/N is less sexually experienced than her boyfriend, Jimin, and she wants to change that by getting another person involved as well.

*This is a continuation of a short fic I wrote three years ago called “Experience.”  t’s not required to read Experience first, but I would recommend it!! It can be found on my Masterlist as well! Pls check author notes at the end*

Pairing: Jimin x Female Reader x OC Vanessa

Genre & Rating: Smut, 18+ (kind of just pwp but like 97% porn!)

Warnings: bisexual!OC, bisexual/bi-curious!reader, threesome, oral (f & m. recieving),  dom!jimin, dom!OC, sub!reader (y/n is kinda getting passed around in this idk), a little degradation, some praise, sexual insecurities, breast fondling, handjob, blowjob, bondage? (Y/n gets tied up with a belt), sexual intercourse, unprotected sex (pls be safe guys), use of sex toys (dildos), honestly it’s hard to put warnings because so much happened here and it’s absolutely filthy pls just read with caution!!

Length: 7.2k words

*This fic is currently un-edited*

Kay-Diggle’s Ultimate Masterlist

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“Jimmmiinn,” you said in a sing-song tone.

“Oh god,” he groaned playfully. “What is it y/n?”

“Well, I saw an interesting post on Twitter earlier and it got me thinking-”

“Well that’s never good,” he cut you off, a teasing smile on his face.

“Shut up!” you laughed, moving to straddle his lap. You knew you would have to up the sex appeal for what you were about to propose to him.

“There was a woman who made a tweet about how she and her boyfriend had a threesome with some other girl and he ended up getting the girl pregnant.”

“Wow.. that’s terrible. She must be heart-broken,” he frowned but you couldn’t help but smile a little at how your boyfriend was always so thoughtful towards other people’s feelings, even those he didn’t know.

“Yeah, it sucks. She was super upset….”

“Yeah,” he studied your face, trying to see any reason why you’d be bringing this up to him. “Y/n, where exactly is this going?”

“Well… I was just curious about whether you have ever had a threesome before?” you asked shyly, making yourself a bit smaller in his lap. When you had planned the conversation out in your head hours earlier, you didn’t think you would be this nervous.

“Have I ever had a threesome?” your boyfriend raised his eyebrows as he repeated your question.

“Honestly, yes, with two girls. BUT it was a long time ago -- way before we met, and super random.”

You remembered the conversation you had with him a few months ago about your inexperience  when you had sucked him off for the first time, and you couldn’t help but frown. His reassurance from before had definitely made you feel much better, but his answer was disappointing. You wanted him to say no. You wanted him to never have done anything as “freaky” as having a threesome. But it is supposed to be every man’s dream, right? Or maybe that’s just a bad stereotype. Either way, he’s done it.

The sex between you and Jimin was always good, but always the same. Never switching it up much, usually vanilla, nothing but soft touches. The first and only time you had ever seen a more dominant side to him was when he was coaching you through giving your first blow job and you absolutely loved it. You wanted to see that side of him again. And although his reassurance was nice, upon hearing his answer to your question, you immediately went back into questioning if you were good enough to please him. I mean how could you, who had been a virgin a few months ago, compete with his sexual experience of having two girls at once.

But really, you felt most disappointed because you wanted him to say no so that it could be something you’d experience for the first time together.

And Jimin being the ever observant boyfriend he was immediately picked up on mood shift. “Babe?”

“Hmm?”

“What’s wrong? And before you tell me ‘nothing,’ I know you’re lying,” he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer towards his body.

You sighed. “I asked for a reason but then I kind of just got into my own head just now, and now I don’t know how I feel. Just forget I asked, it’s stupid. I’m stupid,” you tried to move off of his lap, making him tighten his hold on you.

“Okay, woah woah woah, slow down. Why did you ask, and what did you think because of the answer? I need you to talk to me okay, I’m right here,” he brought one hand up to cup your cheek, guiding you to look him in the eyes. You melted at his words once again, getting ready to spill your guts.

“Well… I was.. It’s just.. You being with two girls made me feel a little insecure,” you confessed, avoiding his eyes.

Jimin sighed deeply before removing his other arm from around you to hold your face in his both hands, forcing you to look at him again. “This is the last time we’re having this conversation. This will be the last time that I tell you nothing I did in the past matters anymore. I love you; I only want you. You are perfect in every aspect of the word.” He kissed you and you wanted to cry. You loved this man so much.

“Okay,” you gave him a sad smile after your lips left each other. “I only asked because… well.. I wanted you to not have done it before because….. I wanted us to try it together,” you mumbled that last part under your breath, hoping he couldn’t hear you, but he did. And he was dumbfounded.

“You- you want to have a thre- threesome?”

You winced at his question. “Yes.. is that crazy?”

“No!” he rushed to make sure you knew he wasn’t judging you. “Babe it’s not crazy at all, I just didn’t think it would be something you were into.”

“Well… are you into it?”

“I mean, I guess I could be. I don’t particularly like the idea of sharing you though,” he joked, easing your nerves just a bit.

“Well I’d be sharing you too. Plus I want it to be with another girl!”

“Oh.”

To say Jimin was surprised would be an understatement. Everything about this conversation had shocked him, but this? He would have never seen this coming.

“Well.. do you like girls? In that way? Is that what this is about?” he asked thoughtfully.

“I’ve been attracted to women in the past, yes, but I’ve never really thought about it too deeply. Women are just beautiful, ya know?” you chuckled. “I would like to experience being with a girl to see how I like it, but we really don’t have to -”

“We can if you’re comfortable with it,” he cut you off. “I just- are you sure this is a good idea? If we do this, I don’t want you comparing yourself to the other girl.”

“I won’t! I mean… I’ll try my best not to. But I honestly think it could be fun. Doing things with you, and getting to have my first experience with another girl at the same time.”

And you also thought that Jimin having a new memory of a threesome that you were in replacing the memory of the old one could be a plus too.

“Okay then, let’s do it,” he smiled and kissed you.

-

It was a girl you had gone to high school with, Vanessa. She had came out as bisexual and openly dated and hooked up with both sexes. You weren’t exactly friends but had always been friendly enough with each other due to having common acquaintances. And she was hot. And also super nice. When you had reached out to her and explained your situation, she agreed with little to no reluctance.

Jimin took the backseat, wanting you to have the final decision in everything. In his mind, all he had to do was show up and make sure you were happy and feeling secure in your relationship. He wanted this entire experience to be about you and what you wanted which is why he easily agreed to the girl you chose, not taking much interest in her in the first place. He only had eyes for you and made sure to let you know as much as he could in the days leading up to the time you scheduled with Vanessa.

Now sitting in Jimin’s bedroom with your two partners, you felt a little more than awkward with the situation; however, Vanessa was quick to create a pleasant atmosphere with Jimin’s help.

“So, is there anything off limits for you two?” she asked.

You and Jimin shared a look, realizing that this was probably something you should have discussed beforehand. “Well.. uh, Y/n?” Jimin offered the question to you.

“Um… I don’t think so? Maybe just nothing with anal cause I’ve never done that before. Other than that, I think I’m good.”

“Alright, I can work with that,” Vanessa smiled sweetly. “Anything else?”

“No, I think we’re all set,” said Jimin.

“Great. Well then….” Vanessa got up and started moving towards you with a predatory gaze. “Let’s get these clothes off you,” she started removing your jacket after pulling off her own.

She caressed your arm before straddling your lap. You wrapped your arms around her waist, looking up at her with slightly scared eyes. She giggled at you before kissing you. The kiss was slow as she was clearing testing the waters, and when she started grinding down on your lap, you took the initiative to slip your tongue into her mouth, but she kept in control of the kiss anyways. As Vanessa rocked her hips on you, she moved your hands to make you grab her ass.

And Jimin sitting next to you was getting hard beyond belief at the sight of you two all over each other. Frankly, it makes him feel like one of those horny teenage boys who always fantasize about two women being together. He decided to intervene, coughing slightly to remind the two of you of his presence.

Vanessa pulled away from the kiss at that sound, smirking before she moved to sit in his lap too. His hands found a place on her waist, but he was sure to look at you for confirmation before doing anything. When you gave him a small nod, they moved to kiss each other. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy the feeling of her lips, but at the end of the day, they just weren’t yours.

“Move towards the headboard,” Vanessa sent the command to you once she pulled away from your boyfriend’s lips.

You followed her instructions and watched as she got off of Jimin’s lap and sunk to her knees in between his legs. Jimin had to take in a breath at the sight of her seductive eyes looking back at her. She unbuckled his belt, pulled it through the loops of his jeans and placed it in his hands, muttering a quick ‘hold this’ before starting to rub him through his pants. And when she licked him through his pants, he leaned back on his palms, waiting for her to get to work with her mouth. However, she had other plans.

“Oh Jimin, as fine as you are… and you are VERY fine, I’m more interested in playing with her,” she nodded her head towards you.

Having been sitting near the headboard this whole time and just watching, you were expecting the same as Jimin, that Vanessa was going to give him a blowjob, so when the attention was suddenly centered on you, you froze.

She stood to her feet and pulled you by your ankles to make you lay down. While you tried to control your breathing, Vanessa whispered something in your boyfriend's ear and stood back while Jimin approached you, smirking. He spread your legs and crawled in between them to sit on his knees, coming down to kiss you. His hands find your waist and begin tugging up the hem of your shirt before it's pulled over your head and thrown on the floor. You take the initiative to unhook your bra too before laying back down, pulling Jimin to kiss you again before breaking away.

“Y/n, Jimin is going to tie you up,” Vanessa comes to the side of the bed, breaking you out of the trance Jimin’s lips just put you in.

You felt Jimin bring your wrists together and wrap his belt around them, fastening them to one of the bars of the headboard. You tugged at the restraints to find that they weren’t too tight but tight enough that you couldn’t  break free which made you a little tense. Sensing this, Jimin rubbed your thighs to soothe you and leaned down to press sweet kisses to the side of your neck.

“You doing okay?” he whispered.

“Yes… kiss me,” you replied and your lips connected once more.

Jimin schooched down the bed and took your panties and shorts off with him, leaving you bare for Vanessa who took Jimin’s place in between your legs. She kissed your lips, then moved to your neck leaving tiny love bites, and worked her way down to your breasts massaging both of them in her hands and licking and biting one of your nipples while looking you directly in the eyes before switching to the other. Behind her, you saw Jimin leaning against the wall in your room, staring at the sight before him and looking absolutely delectable. You couldn’t help the tiny moans you let out, so aroused that your wetness was starting to drip out of you and onto the bed.

When Vanessa had enough of teasing you, she turned back to look at boyfriend. “Do you eat your girlfriend out a lot Jimin?”

“Whenever she wants.”

“Good. Tell me how she likes it then,” Vanessa turned back to you, smirking before kissing down the length of your torso and biting at the inside of your thigh, closest to where you need her. You felt her breath puff out against you, creating a cooling sensation.

Jimin moved towards the bed and sat on his knees near your head, looking at you once before turning to watch Vanessa as he gave her instructions.

“Lick up her slit a few times, slowly,” he said and watched as she did so. “Good, now use the tip of your tongue to circle around her clit and then suck on it… fuck, just like that.”

Jimin couldn’t take his eyes off the sight of this woman eating you out. He was really turned on by it and you could tell when you saw him gripping himself through his tight jeans. At that moment, you decided to help him get off too.

“Fuck… uh, Jimin?” He finally turned his eyes towards you and all you saw was lust. “Fuck my mouth while she eats me out… please?”

And he didn’t even have to think twice before removing his clothes, joining you back on the bed. You tilted your head in his direction and stuck your tongue out, allowing him to gently tap it with the tip of his cock a few times. When you heard him whisper out a quiet ‘fuck,’ you suckled on the tip a little bit, swirling your tongue around it before letting him stick more of his length into your mouth. He let out a moan at the feeling of your mouth around him, and then let out another one when he turned to see Vanessa still eating you out after getting the hang of it.

He watched as she licked on your clit, sucked it and then thrust her tongue into your center a few times, causing you to let out little moans around him. Vanessa licked her way back up to your clit before lightly slapping your clit. The shock from it had you jolting up, taking more of Jimin in your mouth and when he felt your throat tighten around him, he threw his head back in pleasure, trusting into your mouth a little more aggressively.

“Fuck Vanessa, do that again,” he directed her and she listened, making you cry out around Jimin’s cock.

He brought his hand down to your head to remove the hair that was falling into your eyes and wrapped one hand around the back of your neck to thrust into your mouth more easily. “Fuck her open with your fingers,” he commanded while looking straight into your eyes, still thrusting.

When you felt Vanessa collect some of your wetness on a finger before sliding it in and sucking on your clit again, you gagged around Jimin. He let out a deep moan of your name at the feeling before taking himself out of your mouth to let you breathe. You coughed a few times and then he came down to kiss you again but all you could do was let out moans against his mouth as Vanessa added another finger into you and curled them, pushing that spongy spot inside of you.

“Does what she’s doing feel good, baby?” he asked.

“Yes.. it feels really good,” you nodded. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” you confessed.

“Jimin,” Vanessa stilled her fingers but licked against your clit just once. “Do I stop, or should we let her cum?”

“Hmm,” he looked down at you. “I don’t know. She’s been good, hasn’t she?” his hand traveled down to your soaking pussy, two fingers rubbing  your clit.

“Yessss,” you whined, and then Vanessa began fucking you with her fingers again.

“Oh God, s-so soo close,” you breathed out.

“Yea? You gonna be a good little slut and come for us Y/n?” Jimin asked, slapping your clit lightly before rubbing again. And then you saw white as your orgasm took over, your back arching as you pulled at the belt against your wrists. Vanessa held your hips down and legs open while Jimin continued rubbing you through your orgasm before he saw it was too much for you.

“Good girl,” Vanessa cooed, rubbing your thigh as you came down from your high. “So good for me and your boyfriend,” she giggled as she pressed kisses into your thigh.

“What happens now?” you asked breathlessly.

“I don’t know.. Should we keep her tied up?” Jimin directs his question to Vanessa.

“Hmmm.. no. I think I have an idea,” she replied, moving off the bed to strip out her clothes and get something out of her backpack.

After Jimin undid the belt, he kissed both of your wrists, wrapping them around his neck taking you into his arms to kiss your lips. You giggled, loving how your boyfriend could be so caring a minute after calling you a slut and making you cum with another person you forgot was in the room until you felt her hands rubbing your backside and kissing your neck.

“I have a strap,” she whispered in your ear. “Can I fuck you?”

You weren’t expecting this, so you looked at your boyfriend in shock, but when you saw in his eyes that he was turned on by the thought of you getting fucked with a plastic dick, you said yes.

“Sorry Jimin, she’s mine for the next few minutes,” Vanessa jokingly pushed him away and he sat against the headboard, gripping his hard length.

You watched as Vanessa tied the strap around her waist, and then she gathered your hair into one hand and moved your head towards the plastic dick, prompting you to get on your hands and knees,

“Suck on it a little bit, Y/n. Get it nice and wet so I can fuck you with it.”

You looked up at her and then down at the fake penis and opened your mouth, allowing her to guide it into your mouth. It was different from what you were used to, missing the warmth and thick girth that your boyfriend provided, but being a bit lengthier. You bob your head on it, coating it with your saliva before pulling back.

“Stay right there,” Vanessa whispered, kissing you and patting your check before moving behind you, giving you a full view of your boyfriend with his hand wrapped around his cock, precum dripping from the tip. He stared back at you with an intensity you’ve never seen from him before.

Vanessa watched the two of you for a second before harshly smacking your right ass cheek, making you whimper and arch your back even more.

“Is Jimin the only person who’s ever fucked you Y/n?” Vanessa asked while rubbing the tip of the toy against your wetness, slightly pushing into you and then quickly pulling out, effectively teasing you.

“Yes,” you breathe out.

“Yea? Well let’s change that, hmm?”

And then she slid the toy into you. You were so wet that there was little to no resistance because of how wet you’ve been the whole time. And again, you were missing the warmth that comes with Jimin’s cock, but this plastic one still felt good enough to make you almost scream out ‘oh shit’ as she bottomed out into you. She pulled out, and gave you a few more thrusts, allowing you to adjust to the toy. She tightened her grip on your waist, and sped up her movements a bit. Once she was able to fuck you more easily, she brought her hand to your head and pushed it down towards the bed, making you arch your back further and allowing her to go deeper.

“That feel good Y/n?”

“So good, so so good,” your moans muffled out into the pillow she was holding your head into.  out as you felt her hitting that spongy spot inside of you again.

Vanessa leaned down towards you, moving the hair that had fanned out across your cheek to the side and whispered in your ear, “tell your boyfriend how much you like it.”

With your head still pressed into the pillow, your eyes traveled up your boyfriend's body. His hard cock was standing at attention, tip red with precum leaking out, his hand wrapped tightly around it. He was lazily stroking it as he watched the scene before him. Your eyes traveled up more to see his toned chest and the bottom half of his face where he was biting his lip so hard it looked like he might draw blood.

Once your eyes found your boyfriends, you were surprised, as you had never seen his eyes so dark before, so full of lust. You had never seen him so turned on. “I like it,” you groaned out onto the pillow.

Jimin used his free hand to slip the pillow from under your head. “ What was that? I couldn’t hear you, slut.”

“I like it,” you nearly screamed as Vanessa was hitting all the right spots within you.

“Yea? You like getting fucked by Vanessa? You like her using that plastic in you while I’m sitting here, aching for you? You have me right here but you also needed the dildo cause you’re a greedy little whore, aren’t you?”

It was at this moment that you became aware of your boyfriend's degradation kink. You also found that you liked being degraded.

“Fuck yes!” you yelled out as you felt Vanessa move her hand underneath your body, her fingers finding your clit and rubbing it in a circular motion while continuing to pound you into the bed.

You were close. So close to coming again when you felt Vanessa stop, and pull your body up by your hair. You were at eye level with Jimin now and continued to hold eye contact with him as Vanessa gave you little shallow strokes in this new position.

“You’re letting somebody slut you out in front of your own boyfriend. Imagine what our classmates would think Y/n. You were always such a good girl,” she said, giving you a sharp thrust. “See how hard your boyfriend is for you, hmm? You got wetter when he was talking to you just now. Why don’t you be a good girl and go help him out. Go ride him Y/n.”

“Come here, pretty girl,” he called to you and held out his hand for you to take. It sounded like his voice had dropped another octave or two.

Once you were close enough, his hands gripped your waist and guided you to straddle his lap. As you were still kind of inexperienced, Jimin knew you still felt a little insecure about your riding skills, so he decided to guide you.

“You still okay?” he whispered.

“Yea.. are you?” you smiled and looked down at his hard length, wrapping your hand around it. He hissed at the feeling and dove in for a kiss.

You felt  Vanessa sneak up behind you and replace your hand on Jimin’s dick, sliding it back and forth between your sopping wet folds as the two of you continue to kiss. When Vanessa lines Jimin up with your entrance, Jimin breaks the kiss and uses his grip on your waist to pull you down onto his length. Both of your mouths drop open, momentarily speechless at the feeling. It felt much different than what you had experienced with Vanessa. He was warm inside of you. He was familiar… It felt like returning home.

Vanessa’s hands joined Jimin’s on your waist, and they both began to guide you to move up and down on his cock. You wrapped your arms around his neck to try and ground yourself somehow when Vanessa continued guiding you while Jimin focused his efforts on thrusting up into you.

“Oh my God,” Jimin whined as his lips found purchase on your neck, leaving kisses all over the area and little love bites.

“Now keep bouncing on your boyfriend’s cock just like that,” Vanessa said as she released her hold on you. You felt one of her hands travel from your waist and up your torso, stopping to play with one of your breasts and lightly pinch your nipple and then move further up until it was wrapped around your neck, slightly choking you. Her other hand moved to play with your clit again. You closed your eyes and cried out as soon as you felt her fingers on you. You weren’t going to last much longer, and you knew you wouldn’t be able to hold it.

“Jimin, I think we’re about to make your girlfriend cum,” Vanessa teased, tightening her grip on your throat.

“I think you’re right,” he lightly chuckled. “Look at me, pretty girl,” Jimin said, slapping your thigh and then letting his hands replace Vanessa’s on your waist. “Look right at me baby, open your eyes.”

You did as he commanded and were met with a sight you loved to see. Your boyfriend looked absolutely wrecked. Sweat dripping from his forehead, cheeks flushed, lips swollen from bites and kisses, and eyes darker than ever.

Jimin’s look paired with the dirty talk you couldn’t quite comprehend that Vanessa was whispering into your was pushing you over the edge.

“My pretty girl is gonna cum for me, right? My pretty little slut is gonna cum all over my cock, hmm? Keep those eyes open. Right on me.”

And you did exactly as he said. Your orgasm hit you, leaving your jaw slack and your body leaning back into Vanessa. Your legs started shaking as you raised yourself off his cock and let out heavy pants. Vanessa sat back with you between her legs, cooing at you, calling you all kinds of ‘pretty’ and ‘good girl’ as you came down from your high.

Without your knowledge, as you were busy trying to catch your breath, Jimin and Vanessa shared a quick look and head nod before both of their full attention were back on you. Jimin crawled in between your open legs and pressed a light kiss on your forehead as Vanessa continued to stroke your arms in a comforting way.

“You’re doing so well for us, y/n,” he said, pecking your lips. “You want to keep going?”

You were fucked out of your mind at this point, and so, you just nodded your head and gave your boyfriend a stupid smile.

“Okay. Stay just like this for me,” he sweetly stroked your cheek. “Vanessa, hold her legs open,” he instructed.

Vanessa held your legs up using the area behind your knees and then widened them. This position essentially left you immobile as you were laying directly on Vanessa and couldn’t move backwards either. And it’s exactly what Jimin wanted.

He slapped the tip of his cock against your sensitive and engorged clit a few times, smiling at your whining before using his hand to guide himself into your entrance once more.

“Fuck Y/n, you feel so good,” he groaned as he bottomed out. “Always so fucking good for me.”

His hands gripped your torso and he began fucking you faster, fucking you with purpose. The wet sound of skin slapping against skin mixed with your non stop moaning filled the room. You were so wet that he slipped out of you and he re-entered you, quickly resuming his previous movements.

The feeling was becoming too much for you to handle, too good, and you started wiggling your hips a little trying to move back, but it was impossible to do so with Vanessa’s grip on your legs and her body directly behind yours. Your boyfriend realized what you were trying to do and let out a deep chuckle.

“Vanessa,” Jimin calls out to her as he started slowing down his thrusts. . “Do you wanna know a secret?”

“Mmmhmm,” she hummed in response, too focused on watching your boyfriend move in and out of you.

“Y/n here is a runner,” he grunted. “Almost every time I fuck her, she tries to run from me. That’s why I’m happy you’re here.”

He looks down at you while you look up at him and his grip on your toso tightens. He stops his movements inside of you completely before lowering himself more towards you and giving you a light peck on your lips.

“There’s nowhere-” hard thrust “for you-” hard thrust “to run-” harder thrust “now.”

He began fucking you harder and harder, and you didn’t think you had ever felt him so deeply inside of you before. You could also feel Vanessa holding onto your legs tighter and grinding against the bed, no doubt turned on by the scene between you and your lover unfold right in front of her.

“Hmm.. look at how well you’re taking that dick Y/n. I know it feels so good. You should never run from it, sweetie,” said Vanessa. “Do you wanna cum again? Want your boyfriend to have you shaking all over his cock again?”

“Yes,” you looked up to her and answered, being so fucked out you were barely able to get the word out.

“Well I’m not the one fucking you am I?” she nodded towards Jimin. “Tell your boyfriend what you want. Ask him to let you cum.”

You refocused your attention on the man fucking into you. At this point, your eyes were so low that you could barely see him. Before you could even say anything, he shook his head at you causing you to whine once more.

“Can I please cum, Jimin? I’ve been so good for you and Vanessa. Please make me cum. Please let me cum. Please, please, please, please, please,” you cried. You could hear the desperation in your own voice and normally you would’ve been embarrassed, but you wanted to come so badly that you couldn’t even find it within yourself to care.

“You wanna come baby? I’ll make you cum.”

And you were so close, so so close to that feeling, that undeniable bliss you had been chasing, but Jimin stopped fucking you to reposition your body with the help of the girl holding you. Now Vanessa was sitting on her knees, your torso on her thigh, and holding your legs back while Jimin’s hands were on your hips, holding them up off the bed. As he continued fucking you, much harder and faster now, your body rocked back and forth against Vanessa’s thighs. And every thrust he gave you was pushing into your g-spot once more. They could both tell you were super close now, and Vanessa almost dropped one of your legs to move her hand towards your clit again until Jimin directed her not to.

“Don’t touch her,” he directed the comment towards Vanessa. “If she wants to cum, she’s gonna do it just like this… fuck,” he groaned.

The feeling of him pressing into your g-spot repeatedly left you shaking, and the sound of his thighs slapping against your ass left your ears ringing. It was like you were feeling everything all at once, but the feelings felt so good that you were numb. As Jimin was fucking you as best as he could and Vanessa was trying to sooth you with her words and light kisses on your forehead, all you could do was yell out any and everything that came to mind about how it felt so good, how it was too much, how you never wanted it to end, and how badly you wanted– needed to come.

And eventually, you did. The feeling was so intense, so overpowering and euphoric that you didn’t even realize you were crying. Or how hard your legs were shaking, or that you had squirted all over your boyfriend’s lower abdomen.

You didn’t register anything that had happened until you heard both Vanessa and your boyfriend cooing at you. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you up towards him and pressing his lips against your own. Vanessa rubbed your back as he hugged you, both of them whispering praises in your ear like no tomorrow.

You were thoroughly fucked out. There was no way you would be able to take anymore and they both knew that. You knew that both Vanessa and Jimin had not cum yet as both of them had been focusing their energy on trying to make you cum. You also knew that Jimin wouldn’t make a move towards her without your permission first, so despite you being tired, you decide to make the first move for them.

“Vanessa, lay down,” you commanded, but your voice came out smaller than you expected it to.

Nevertheless, she laughed before doing as you asked, and you joined her on the bed. Your lips connected and before you knew it, you were in a heated make out session with lip biting and tongue everywhere. You hummed into the kiss before moving your lips down her neck, across her collarbones, and to her breast leaving little kisses in your wake. Your hands found both of her breasts, squeezing and massaging them just to get a feel, as you had never felt a pair that wasn’t your own. And then your lips wrapped around one of her nipples, sucking lightly and then giving the same treatment to the other. One of your hands slid down the rest of her body and found its way to her wet center.

When your cool hands connected with her wet warmth, she let out a deep sigh. You quickly looked back at Jimin, signaling that you wanted him to join you, thus he began kissing Vanessa and playing with her tits as you abandoned them for her pussy. After completely coating your index finger in her wetness, you slid it into her wet hole and heard her moan out even louder, asking you to add in another finger. And you did just that, slowly finger fucking her while moving further down on the bed. You had never touched a girl in this way, and you had never eaten a girl out, but you figured you might as well try it now.

When your face reached her center, you gave her clit a little experimental lick, and you felt her wiggle her hips a bit. She was too occupied with what Jimin was doing with her to give you directions, so you just decided to go for it and wrap your lips around her clit, sucking it harshly.

“Fuck y/n, that’s so good. Just like that please.”

Her little praise motivated you to keep going, changing the angle of your fingers inside of her and eating her out more messily, so much so that her juices were spreading over your face. You looked up to see her jerking your boyfriend off while he was still teasing her nipples. They were both so close, and you wanted them both to cum after they had fucked you so well.

“Jimin, come fuck her,” you said, before going back down to lick her once more.

When his eyes met yours to see that you were 100% okay with it, he obeyed and you switched spots with him. You watched him give himself a few more jerks before lining up with her entrance, but you stopped him with a low ‘wait’ before he could go in. Your eyes met his and you gave him the most sultry look you could muster before you bent down and took his length into your mouth, deepthroating him immediately and keeping your eyes on his the entire time as you began bobbing your head on him as well. You took him out of your mouth and spit on his length, rubbing it up and down on him trying to get him nice and wet.

“Now you can fuck her,” you smirked, letting him go and moving back towards Vanessa. He really never thought that you would be so freaky, and in that moment, Jimin wanted to bend you over and fuck you again, but he figured he would save it for another day.

He slid his cock into Vanessa, stretching her out and watching as she gasped at the feeling.

“Hoy fuck,” she moaned. “My god y/n, your boyfriend feels amazing. So so big. God, I’m not gonna last,” she whined.

“That’s okay,” Jimin started. “I’m not gonna last much longer either,” he said as he started to speed up.

As he was fucking her, you went to sit next to him and watch. You never thought you would be turned on watching your boyfriend with someone else, but the sight in front of you was nothing short of incredible. Who wouldn’t be turned while watching two extremely hot people fuck?

You momentarily stole his attention when you kissed on his neck, prompting him to turn his head and kiss you fully. But you didn’t wanna ruin this for Vanessa, so you broke away from him and crawled closer to her, kissing her again before running a hand down the length of her body before connecting your fingers with her clit. You rubbed fast circles against it, leaving her moaning into your mouth and tightening around Jimin’s cock before her jaw dropped completely.

“Fuck I’m close,” he warned, speeding up his thrusts. “I’m so fucking close. Oh my god.”

“Me too, me too,” Vanessa groaned.

“Y/n, turn around, come here,” Jimin instructed.

And so you changed your position so that you were straddling Vanessa’s stomach, facing Jimin and matching his height at the moment. Your fingers resumed their work on her clit which made her cry out once more, and one of Jimin’s hands moved to wrap around the back of your neck. And while Vanessa began to rub and play with your ass that was in front of her, your boyfriend pulled you in for a kiss while he continued to fuck into the girl below you. Even though he was fucking someone else, his focus was still on you, just like it always was.

And when Jimin began to fuck her harder, hitting all the right spots, she came with a loud “oh shit.” It was the leg shaking, toes curling, eyes rolling back kind of orgasm that Vanessa rarely ever got when she had sex with guys. She became impossibly tight and Jimin slipped out of her while you moved from on top of her to next to her, rubbing her stomach in a soothing manner like she had done for you when you came.

After Vanessa had a quick breather, she pulled you to join her on the floor as you both sat on your knees. You had a feeling that you knew where she was going with this, so you held your hand out for your boyfriend to take, leading him to stand in front of both you and Vanessa. Jimin could’ve cum at the sight below him– two girls that he had fucked and completely wrecked, one of them which he was completely in love with. And his dick was incredibly hard, possibly harder than it had been ever before.

Both you and Vanessa wrapped a hand around him and began stroking him together. And you decided to suck on his tip while Vanessa stroked the rest of his length. Jimin threw his head back in absolute pleasure and let out the loudest moan you’d heard from him yet. His hand found the back of your head, wanting you to lower your mouth a bit, and Vanessa followed your bobbing movements with her hand until she decided to change course and began suckign on his balls. After a few seconds of this, when the feeling became too much, Jimin finally came down your throat with a loud moan of your name as Vanessa was still fondling his balls and until he let go of you fell back to sit on the bed.

You tried your best to swallow the sticky substance, but as all of it didn't end up in your mouth and began dripping on your cheek, Vanessa licked it off of your face before kissing you with tongue to get more.

“Fucking hell..” Jimin sighed, watching the scene before him.

When you finally broke away from the kiss with Vanessa and met his eyes, you giggled before turning back to Vanessa and giving her one last peck. Your boyfriend held out his hand to help you stand up and join him on the bed before offering the same thing to Vanessa. She only stood and then put her hands on her hips, loudly breathing out before looking down at the both of you on the bed. A shy smile spread across your face before you snuggled closer to your boyfriend, and Vanessa just giggled, finding you to be extremely cute.

She excused herself to the bathroom to shower before packing her things up and getting ready to go. You showed her out, hugged her goodbye, and thanked her once again for joining you both.

When she left and you rejoined Jimin, you couldn’t meet his eyes, not after all of the depraved shit you just did. And when you went to sit on the opposite side of the bed, he knew something was up.

“You’re freaking out in your head right now, aren’t you?” he chuckled.

“Well how could I not be freaking out. We just did…. all of.. that!”

“I know,” he whispered, getting up to join you on your side of the bed. He pushed you to lay down and then laid on top of you, forcing you to look him in the eyes. “But you liked it, right? It wasn’t too much for you?” You could hear the concern in his voice.

“No… I did like it. I’m probably gonna be really sore for the next couple of days, but I’d say this experience was worth it,” you laughed.

“Then that’s all that matters, Y/n. That, and the fact that I absolutely love you,” he said.

He kissed you and the smile grew across your face.

You knew that any future experiences you had, whether they be sexual or not, you wanted them all to be with him.

-

Notes: If you’ve read this before it’s because I previously posted and private this twice but OMMMGGG, I’m kinda getting emotional right now because I worked on this fic for over a year and generally haven’t posted in about two years. This is the longest fic I’ve written thus far (also the smuttiest) and I’m kind of proud of it. I can’t promise that I’ll write more but if this story is received well, then I’ll definitely make an effort to try. Hope anyone who comes across this enjoys and PLEASE leave feedback; it’s greatly appreciated! :) Also, I’m also planning to keep this little “series” going and write about more of Y/n’s firsts so stay tuned for that!

Another thing, I have more time in my schedule to write now so IM REOPENING MY REQUESTS! SEND SOME IN PLZ & THNX! 

#bts fanfic #bts fanficition #bts fanfics #bts fic #bts x reader #bts smut #jimin x reader #park jimin fanfic #park jimin fanfiction #jimin fanficition #jimin smut #bts ffs #fanficition #jimin fluff #smut

[shikamarusprettygirl]

Pairings: clingy!park jimin x reader

AN: so this was written by my sister (her first time writing) and she would really like to know what people thinks about it, so if you could leave her your feedback that would be great!

"Baaabe." Your boyfriend Park Jimin whined for the millionth time today. You rolls your eyes as you finish applying your make up. Getting ready for a night out with friends. You hadn't been seeing them since Jimin had a break from touring. You loved that he finally had a break and you could be with him more. But you would be lying if you didn't say he wasn't getting a little needy. You and him have been inseparable for 2 weeks and a much needed break was needed for a healthy relationship.

You sigh "I'm fully dressed and finishing my makeup. I'm going out." You turn and look at him standing in the door way watching you with a pout. You shake your head and smile because he's so dramatic. Adorable but dramatic. You push pass him to look for some shoes. He follows. "Jimin I won't anymore friends if I cancel again." "Don't cancel just don't show up." He replies as if it's that simple.

You glare at him. "Hey look I'm just saying deal with it tomorrow." He says walking closer to you. "I can't just not show up. My friends already think you kidnapped me." You say with arms in the air. This makes him scoff. "Your friends have you to yourself all the time when I'm working." He says with raised brows. "I know. I know. But babe you've been a little needy lately and me going out would be good for us." You say definite and return to your search of shoes. Jimin leaves the room with a huff.

You sigh. You didn't want to go out. You really wanted to stay home with Jimin. But you didn't want to be one of those couples that didn't have a life outside of each other. One of those girls whose whole personality was about her boyfriend. Also dating a mega K-pop star didn't help. Jimin always told you not to but you read the comments some of their fans would leave. "Jimin is not the same anymore." "Jimin doesn't go live as much." "Jimin's has changed." And they all blamed you. You wince thinking about those negative comments. And it's not all the fans majority were positive and sweet. But the meaners do stick out. So you decided that you be strong and go out. Hoping Jimin would do a live for the fans and show that you don't want Jimin to forget them. Even more decided you grab a jacket and check yourself out in the mirror satisfied with your appearance, you walk out the room.

"How do I look." You give a quick spin. "Beautiful." He stares at you with hunger. You know that look and start searching for your purse before you get trapped by his eyes. " Y/N." He grabs you by the wrist stopping you mid search. He turns you gently to face him. "Y..yess." You reply breathlessly. Avoiding his eyes. "Look at me." You ignore the request. He places his forehead on yours. "Look at me." He begs with a whisper. The tug in your heart drowns out the no's in your mind and you stare deeply into his eyes. Always caught off guard with how beautiful he his. " I want you to stay with me. Please." He's say's desperately and your heart begins to ache. You start to realize that you might be insane. How could you ever walk out on him? This amazing beautiful man.

He pulls you closer and buries his face in your neck. You feel his breath on your throat when he pleads again. You're so dumb. He only gets this little time with and he has to go back to work full force. He wasn't needy. He just wanted you. His fans gets him all the time. But this was yours. And you didn't want to share. And you weren't going to. "Yes." You say in a whisper. He pulls back to look down you. "I'm staying." You say with no resolve looking into his eyes. "I'll stay forever with you." A tear falling when it hits how in love you are with him. He smiles. God you love his smile. He grabs you buy the face and kisses you hard. He kisses you like you'll disappear. You wrap your arms around his neck returning the kiss with even more vigor. You kiss him with everything. Going deeper. Both of you saying words can't. You pull apart needing to catch your breath. "I love you." He grins. "I love you too." You peck his lips again.

He pulls you to the couch and into him as you sit. You cuddle into him knowing he's going to his beloved Netflix. You shake your head. "Naruto.?" He questions with a knowing pout. "Naruto for the 5th time.? " you sigh jokingly. "Pweease…" he baby talks. Always using his cuteness to get his way. You laugh. "You know I can't ever say no to you right." You smile at him. And pulls you even closer happy. You can't believe you were gonna give up a night like this. You loved that your boyfriend was needy and needed you. You smile to yourself as the intro plays

#park jimin #jimin x you #jimin x reader #park jimin x reader #park jimin x you #park jimin x y/n #bts fic #bts x reader #bts x you #bts x y/n #park jimin imagine #park jimin fanfiction #bts jimin

[coupsie-daisies]

Kinktober '23: Collaring | Park Jimin

Pairing: Park Jimin x GN!Reader

Genre: fluff, Kinktober 2023

Summary: Jimin brings home a surprise to his submissive, proof of his unwavering faith.

WC: 1.3k

Warnings: nonsexual BDSM, Reader is called thing and Angel, use of Sir for Jimin. Honestly that's pretty much it

A/N: So despite being a part of kinktober, I wanted to take this one in a little bit of a softer, fluffier direction. Hope you enjoy!

Tags: @dragonofthenorth0726// @wooyussy // @burningupp-replies // @bunnypig18 // @decaffedthoughts // @brownieracha // @ferrethyun // @snow-pegasus // @wonuqrtz // @mixling-blog

Main Masterlist

Kinktober '23 Masterlist

This fanfiction is property of @/coupsie-daisies, reposting on any other platform is prohibited

You loved days like this one, days where you didn't have anything on your schedule, and Jimin would be getting home early. Days where you could be in your sweet headspace all fogged up and longing to just spread out on the bed and lounge around, or follow Jimin around the house and be in his presence. Which was exactly what you were looking forward to, curled up impatiently on the bed as you scrolled through your phone.

The sound of the door's code lock chiming as it unlocked caught your attention, and you perked up eagerly. You waited, one beat, then two until Jimin called.

"Angel, I'm home." He said, and you could hear the smile in his voice. He knew you were waiting, never wanting to invade his space when he got home until you knew he was ready to be around you. At his call, you scrambled off the bed, nearly falling in your haste to get to him. You didn't run, you knew he didn't like it when you ran in the house, instead shuffling as quickly as you could manage down the hall and through the living room to the door. You beamed, bouncing on the balls of your feet.

"Welcome home, Sir." You greeted brightly, your hands folding in front of you in an attempt to keep from dragging him straight to the bed and curling up to him. You weren't supposed to touch without his permission, a rule he'd put in place to help his own overstimulation. Coming home after a long day could make him overly sensitive, and you were a little clingy sometimes - not that he minded of course, you were his angel - and the two could lead to unwanted tension if you weren't careful.

He motioned to you, holding out a hand to you and laughing when you practically pounced on him, arms looping around his waist and face burying against his shoulder.

"Missed you. Been gone so long," You huffed, your hands fisting into his shirt and keeping him close. He reached up, stroking your hair and letting you relax against him.

"I'm sorry Angel, but at least it was a short day. I would have been home sooner, but I had to pick something up on the way back." He said. You pulled away, your head tilting to the side as you blinked at him with curious eyes. He bit back the urge to kiss all over your face. You were too adorable, he didn't know how he survived seeing it every day.

"What did you pick up? Can I see?" You asked, shifting your weight back and forth as you not so subtly tried to find what he'd brought with him. It must have been fairly small, you deduced, since he was just carrying the same bag he'd had when he left.

"You can, but not yet. Let's go to the bedroom first." He said, sweeping past you and letting you obediently trail after him.

In the bedroom, he closed the door behind you, sitting himself on the edge of the bed and giving you another simple gesture. You didn't hesitate, sinking to your knees in front of him on the floor and looking up at him quietly, pressing your palms flat to your thighs. You tried to ignore the way your mind sped up with anticipation.

Had he brought home a toy? Something new to play with? Or maybe a new outfit for you to try? Or maybe he just wanted you to submit for a little while, release the pent up stress of his day. He patted his thigh, and you crawled forward until you could rest your chin on his knee. He smiled, stroking across your cheek and leaving a small tap against your nose.

"You're so good for me, did you know that?" He asked, a small, satisfied smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He could see your reaction in an instant, your eyes half squinting shut and your chin jutting out proudly at his praise. "Always listen so well, and never ask for more than you need. Always so appreciative just to be with me. I appreciate you too, Angel. More than you'll ever know."

A warmth bloomed through your chest as you leaned your head closer to his touch. You really did adore being with Jimin, it was your favorite way to decompress. You would relax, give all of your thoughts, your stress and your worries over to him, and effortlessly he would weave them into something better, something nicer. A garland of love and pleasure and peace that draped around your neck.

"Do you remember the conversation we had before about wanting to mark you as mine? To tie us together like this?" He asked, his fingers sliding down to tip your chin up, guiding your fogged up gaze to his. You nodded a little, blinking up at him. "Are you still comfortable with the collar idea?"

His thumb slipped lower, running down the side of your neck carefully, and you nodded again, your hands fidgeting in your lap. You'd talked about collars plenty of times, and Jimin had been collecting ideas for you, getting a feel for what you liked. You'd both decided on just getting a play collar for the time being, one you could wear when it was just the two of you. A symbol to coax you deeper into the sweet relief of your headspace without having to take that step out into the everyday world just yet.

"Good. Just wanted to check, sweet thing. Gotta make sure my baby is feeling good." He said, and you made a delighted little noise. He reached for the dance bag that sat on the floor beside him, unzipping it and sliding out a long black box. You perked up again, sitting up straighter and craning your neck to try and see the gold script on the top of the box, but Jimin fixed you with a stern look, and you quickly resettled yourself, trying to keep your anticipation at bay.

He opened the box slowly, carefully setting the lid aside and pulling out the contents. Inside was a pretty strip of leather, deep red with a buckle on the back and a heavy, gold heart dangling from the front of it.

"Do you want to see it?" He asked, and you squirmed, nodding quickly. He chuckled, telling you to hold your hands out. You didn't hesitate to do so, a new wave of excitement washing over you as he placed the collar in your palms. You smoothed your fingers along it. Smooth, and cool to the touch. Sturdy. You pouted at it for a moment before turning back to your Dom with pleading in your eyes.

"Put it on, Sir?" You asked, holding it back out to him. He chuckled, taking it from you and standing up to step around you. He leaned down, carefully situating the collar around your neck and doing up the buckle. His fingers poked and tugged under the edges, testing how tight it was, turning your head this way and that to make sure it wasn't restricting anything.

"How's it feel?" He asked, looking down at you as he settled in front of you again. "Too tight?"

You shook your head, fingers coming to trace along the vivid reminder of your commitment to Jimin, of his to you. You were his to cherish and care for, his to keep for as long as you'd have him. And as far as you were concerned, that meant forever.

"It's perfect. I love it."

Jimin motioned for you to stand, guiding you hand in hand towards the mirror where he wrapped his arms around your waist, the both of you gazing at his claim wrapped delicately around your throat.

Some people wanted wedding bands, or matching tattoos that meant forever. But this, you thought, this pretty little piece of leather was all you wanted. This was a promise that meant more than any words ever could.

copyright 2023 coupsie-daisies, all rights reserved

#park jimin x reader #bts x reader #jimin x reader #bts reader insert #park jimin reader insert #jimin reader insert #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #jimin fanfiction #jimin fanfic #bts #park jimin #jimin #fanfic #fanfiction #x reader #park jimin imagine #bts imagine #jimin imagine #reader insert #reader insert imagine #x reader imagine #x reader fanfic #x reader fanfiction #reader insert fanfiction #reader insert fanfic #coupsie-daisies #coupsie-daisies kinktober 23

[veeparkersstuff]

Happy b-day jimin💗

(Like or reblog, don't repost pls🫶🏻)

#bts #bts park jimin #park jimin #bts moodboard #park jimin smut #jimin edit #jimin #army bts #jimin day #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #park jimin icons #park jimin bts #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin x reader #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #set me free #face jimin #like crazy #serendipity #bts smut

[foxymoxynoona]

After the Applause (Ch. 2)

Header and linebreaks by @awrkives

Single Dad Jimin x Female OC

SUMMARY: Jimin doesn't know how he would have made it this far after the shattering of his world without the support of his thoughtful, generous, helpful neighbor. Hanbyul has lived next to hottie Jimin and his adorable daughter for years now, long enough to remember the wife he was so devoted to and lost far too young. With each safely ensconced on their side of the brick wall of the Parks' grief, it will take an enterprising little scientist to set the stage for a second chance at love.

CW: grief, prior loss of spouse/parent, comfort, explicit sex, secondhand embarrassment

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Hudu was licking his feet so noisily Hanbyul was positive her sister Sobyul would be able to hear it over the phone. Not to mention it was annoying. She hated that wet sound. She threw a pillow at Hudu, who completely ignored it, so instead she got up from the couch and wandered towards her bedroom. 

“Well if the new company has the same position there or here, did you think about applying to the one heer?”

Hudu followed her into the bedroom anyway but at least the sound was disrupted. Hanbyul fell backwards onto her bed.

“Sorry, what?”

“If you’re going to apply for a new job–”

“I didn’t say I was going to apply for it.”

“Since you should apply for the job, have you thought about applying to the one that’s here? It would be nice to have you home.”

“I… didn’t think about that.” Hanbyul sat up again and spaced out staring at the garland of fake pink flowers draped around her doorway, a memento from her sister’s wedding two years ago. She didn’t get home as often as she used to. She didn’t have a good reason. It wasn’t that far a drive, but enough that by the time the weekend rolled around, she was usually too tired from putting in the hours at work to feel like packing Hudu up and making it. Not to mention weekends carried the strong possibility of her crossing paths just in time for dinner with Jimin and Sun-young–

“What do you mean, you didn’t think about it? You found this job that’s perfect for you, that gets you out of your current shitty place and gives you more money and you noticed they have a local branch near home but you didn’t think about applying to it? You just noticed those things without any thought?”

“Ah, be nice. I’m tired,” Hanbyul complained to her sister, though it wasn’t really true. She was restless, not tired. The part about not thinking about it was true though. It hadn’t occurred to her at all to move home.

“Why? Some hottie neighbor boy keeping you up all night–”

“So!”

“That’s a no,” Sobyul sighed noisily. “Any progress at all?”

“What do you mean by progress–”

“Another no. Han…”

Hanbyul’s skin prickled with displeasure at her sister’s disappointed sigh. She regretted having told her about Jimin now, though the thought she could have avoided it all these years was laughable. Of course she’d told her sister about Jimin and Sun-young. She’d told her parents too. They’d even met when her parents had come to visit and Jimin had stopped them in the hall to say how wonderful their daughter was and she’d embarrassingly had to explain to her mother that night no, we aren’t dating, he didn’t mean anything by it, he was just being kind.

“There’s not anything to progress. We’re just neighbors. We’re friend…ly. We’re friends.”

“You don’t want to go for the job even though you found it and want it. You don’t want to go for the man even though you found him and want him.”

“He’s grieving!”

“Forever?”

“It’s only been a few years. How long do you think it would take you to get over losing–”

“Ok, fair, I don’t want to think about it. But it’s happened for him and it’s awful, and you are right there willing to soothe his heart–”

“He’s not interested in that with me,” Hanbyul insisted, feeling certain of it down to her bones. “I don’t think he dates at all but even if he did, I don’t think I’m his type.” She was certainly nothing like the fit dancer Ga Subin had been with her light brown eyes and thick black hair and that statuesque face. Hanbyul was lanky and tall, possibly taller than Jimin though they’d never stood close enough to say for sure. She certainly wasn’t fit, despite a brief attempt at teaching Hudu to go for runs with her (they both failed.) Her face was round and average and her hair was… fine. A little on the thin side so she couldn’t spare any for bangs which meant her big forehead was always on display. Honestly she wasn’t too miserable about her appearance usually but when it came to assessing Jimin’s type, she was clearly not it.

“Then how long are you going to pine for him?”

The question was a direct shot to her heart. Damn Sobyul for always being so beautifully direct. 

“Ugh, forever probably,” she sighed.

“But–”

“No, I know, I know I shouldn’t. I know I shouldn’t.” Maybe if she said it enough, she’d remember it this time. It wasn’t the first time she’d asked herself that question, but always quickly brushed it away because it didn’t matter. Jimin was handsome and kind and impossible to forget. And it’s not like men were lining up to date her and she was missing out on something else. It’s not like longing was even the only thing driving her neighborship with Jimin and Sun-young. It wasn’t! She wasn’t holding onto some hope that Jimin would notice her as a romantic partner someday. She was just around them because she loved them and–

“Is that why you didn’t think about applying to the one here?” Sobyul continued, as if she hadn’t driven her point home enough. 

“No–” Hanbyul started, not sure it was true.

“Because honestly what else is keeping you there? You graduated a long time ago. You don’t have a boyfriend. You don’t have many friends–”

“I have friends!”

“Worth staying away from your family for? I don’t mean to hurt. If you’re happy there, so be it, I just don’t want you to sit around waiting for a man who doesn’t notice you. You’re a catch, Han. Find someone who notices that right away.”

Her sister’s kind conclusion softened the blows delivered by the rest of her words. 

“I… I like living in the city. It’s so quiet where we grew up…”

“Sure but we’re here. Your family is here. Soon your nephew will be here too.Shouldn’t you think about that? I know you adore Park Sun-young, but she isn’t yours.”

“Ok, So. I get it. You’ve said enough.”

There was a beat over the line, and then, “Sorry. But sometimes you need to hear it from someone who loves you.”

The conversation didn’t last long after that. Hanbyul needed to lick her wounds and her sister needed to go eat something “immediately.” Apparently pregnancy was like that. Hanbyul didn’t know. Hanbyul would never know because…

Because she was hung up on a guy who didn’t even see her like that. 

“Damnit,” she sighed and stretched her arms and legs across the bed. It was embarrassing. It was pitiful. It was tragic. But it was true that when Sobyul had asked why she didn’t apply to the office close to her parents, Hanbyul’s heart had quickly interjected because I can’t leave them, they need me.

“They don’t need you, idiot, you’re just there.” Even in the early months after he’d lost his wife, Jimin had other friends he’d been able to rely on. Hanbyul had never been essential, she was just closest in proximity. He let her watch Sun-young sometimes only because she insisted on it, because she genuinely enjoyed it. She wasn’t even the only woman he knew, he was surrounded by them thanks to his profession. And probably they were all in love with them, because who wouldn’t be? His smiles had grown less rare over the years and each time it made the clouds clear and the sun shine. His laugh was infectious. The care he injected into his interactions with people, even after such great loss, spoke to what an incredibly warm person he was. He loved his daughter with everything he had, and he’d loved Ga Subin the same way, and Habyul was such a fool to grasp for whatever small corner of that might grow in him over time to let someone else in. It might never. And if it did, she wasn’t his type.

She let out a deep breath. She deserved better. She deserved her own Park Jimin and her own Park Sun-young. She wanted to be on the inside of a warm family, not just watering the plants and occasionally cooking dinner for someone else’s.

She sat up as Hudu flopped down on the rug beside her bed and began to lick his ass again, as if personally determined to ruin the last shreds of her peace. 

Two paths were before her:

One, apply to the job closer to her family, move there, and see who her parents or sister introduced her to.

Two, meet someone here who gave her a reason to stay in the city she loved; maybe apply to the new job here, maybe not. 

“It’s time to open my heart to something new,” she told Hudu. “No excuses. No dragging my feet. No more pining for Park Jimin–”

Hudu stopped licking and looked at her with big, soulful eyes. He dipped his nose and kept watching her. “No, he’s not coming over… We aren’t seeing him today.” Hudu gave a single bark. “No, I’m not giving you a treat! We have to get used to not seeing him and if I don’t get a treat for growing up about it, you don’t either! I–” At ‘treat’ his ears perked up and he jumped up. “No… no, Hudu, I– fine. Fine, let’s get you a treat and then I guess I will be setting up a dating profile. Is that what people do now? There’s nobody to meet at work… Don’t run off, you’re going to be in my photo too, we’re a package deal, aren’t we? Hudu? Don’t get into the cabinet until I’m there! Hudu!”

Jimin broke the boundary line. He’d waited and waited for Sun-young to come out. Ginam and Boyeon claimed to not know where Sun-young was or what was taking so long. When Tomi’s parents walked by and offered to walk the girls home, they both leapt at the opportunity, as if eager to get away from Jimin. Maybe his pacing seemed too intense? He was hardly a threatening person, but Sun-young’s class started soon and Jimin had a class to teach and where was his daughter?!

He checked the date on his phone just to make sure, but she’d stayed late for the catalyst science-y thing on Tuesday. It was Thursday, and this was more than a few minutes late. And if even her friends didn’t know where she was…

A flash of panic roiled through his stomach. What if something had happened? He didn’t have any missed calls from the school, but after Subin died, it had taken months to get all the emergency contacts for Sun-young changed to him. A full year after, the school had still called Subin’s old number instead of his when she’d started a fever and thrown up at school. It was just a stomach bug, but by the time they’d called him it was late afternoon, Sun-young was sick, and the school was angry with him. Even though the contact information was updated! The new secretary had just defaulted to calling the mother’s phone number over the father’s. Jimin and Sun-young had both had a teary afternoon –and Jimin had needed to find a sub for his classes at the last minute. Stress on top of stress.

So he crossed the boundary line and headed into the school, right for the front office.

“Ah, good afternoon Mr. Park.”

“Good afternoon, Mr. Choi. Is Park Sun-young here?”

“Here in the office? No. Oh perhaps she is in Miss Kwan’s Science Club again, I believe they were making a volcano today.” Mr. Choi’s face lit up as he came around the long desk of the front office. “Park Sun-young was one of the most vocal students in bringing back the Science Club this year. Quite an enterprising young woman, your daughter is! She had many suggestions for fundraisers and explained the ones that have worked the best for her dance school.”

Jimin’s face grew tighter and tighter. Science Club? Fundraisers? What the fuck was Mr. Choi talking about?

“It’s a  club?” Jimin clarified. “Sun-young told me Miss Kwan did an after-school experiment for extra credit on Tuesday and that was all. I haven’t heard of a club.”

“Oh but you signed the…” Mr. Choi trailed off, seeing by Jimin’s face he had signed nothing. “I see. I’m afraid there has been a misunderstanding… we believed we had the permission slip signed by you to allow Sun-young to join in the club, including after school activities several days a week.”

“She has dance four days a week,” Jimin corrected. “And the fifth day I have my own rehearsal so I can’t pick her up at a delayed hour. I didn’t sign anything. I will have a talk with my daughter but please strike her name from the club list.”

He didn’t miss the way Mr. Choi’s face fell, but Jimin’s insides were too much a mixture of stalled panic, annoyance at being late, and embarrassment. It was mortifying to speak with the vice principal and admit you didn’t know where your daughter was or why. To admit she hadn’t said anything about this Science Club and just ignored their schedule requirements so disobediently. A mother would know where her child was, is that was Mr. Choi was thinking? If Sun-young had two parents at home, she wouldn’t forge a permission slip.

Mr. Choi offered to escort him right to the science class, concerned now about this misunderstanding with a child’s parent. Jimin drew a deep breath as they moved through the school. He didn’t want to be a tough dad. He wanted to be an understanding dad. He didn’t want to blow up just because Sun-young had lied to him and embarrassed him and also they were late for dance now so it was a strike against him professionally. She was a child. A child without a mother, with only him, and clearly he wasn’t hacking it if she was going to lie, but also lying about a science club was such a weird thing to lie about… not even theft or drugs or something? Science? Unless she wanted to make drugs– ok no, even in his panic he knew that was ridiculous.

Sun-young huddled around a table in the science classroom with four other students, all wearing goggles and white lab coats and watching closely as Miss Kwan demonstrated something in a beaker. Jimin didn’t see what because as soon as he and Mr. Choi stepped into the room, Sun-young leapt away and pressed her hands to her cheeks.

“Appa, what are you doing here?!”

“What are you doing here, Sun-young? You’re late for dance and you didn’t discuss staying late again with me.”

“I… I did… you…” She looked nervously between Mr. Choi and Miss Kwan as the science teacher quickly set the dropper aside and motioned to the children to wait. 

“I’m sorry, Mr. Park, is there an issue? Science Club meets on Tuesdays and Thursdays–”

“My daughter isn’t in Science Club, she has dance class on Tuesdays and Thursdays.”

“But the paper you signed–”

Sun-young motioned frantically for Miss Kwan to stop talking and then covered her face again as her mistake caught up to her. Miss Kwan’s face lifted into surprise and then settled into a blank mask.

“I see. I’m very sorry for the misunderstanding, Mr. Park. Perhaps we can discuss your daughter’s involvement in the Science Club–”

On another day, Jimin might have noticed more that Sun-young was on the verge of tears, or that the other kids were staring at his daughter, or even that Miss Kwan was pretty and passionate and dedicated to her students. But right now he couldn’t see beyond his own embarrassment and the stress of being late and the frustration of being very confused in a bad way about what was going on. What was Sun-young doing, suddenly blowing off dance rehearsal and forging his signature? Had she really not expected him to notice when she simply didn’t show up to meet him after school?!

“I thought you were smarter than this,” he said to Sun-young doing his best to hold his surging emotions in check. “We’re late–”

“Your daughter is a very curious, bright girl–” Miss Kwan began.

“Yes, I know, thank you, Miss Kwan. She’s also very talented in dance and has a solo coming up, she’s late for a class she elected to take, and I’m late for work, which I need to do to fund that dance passion of hers. If you’ll excuse us.” He grabbed Sun-young’s backpack up, only to shove it down and grab the correct one when Sun-young murmured that it wasn’t hers.

“I’ll reach out,” Miss Kwan called after them as Jimin put his hand on Sun-young’s back to lead her quickly from the classroom. Sun-young recoiled from his touch but scurried along anyway, her face a vision of misery.

Jimin had never been a parent who yelled. He didn’t want to be a dad who yelled even before he became the only parent in Sun-young’s life. His family was only loud in joy. Subin’s family had been quiet in all things. He wanted to raise Sun-young to be a peaceful person, one who knew she could go to her father for anything and never be yelled at.

But the lying. The embarrassment. The disregard for these expensive and advanced dance classes she’d worked so hard to get into. The disrespect for his own professional time and the money he needed to earn so they could live.

So he didn’t lie that things were fine on the way to dance class, he just set his jaw and said nothing. It was a quiet, tense walk. Neither said a word. Not until he led her to her hiphop class with Hoseok –the one she had begged to take even though Jimin didn’t think it was the style that best suited her, but she was interested so he encouraged it!-- and told her,

“Bow and apologize for being late.” And then “She can work hard to make up the time she missed.”

Hoseok tilted his head, clearly confused by what exactly was going on, but he just nodded and sent Sun-young to warm up on her own and then catch up with the choreography everyone else was learning. Jimin gave him an I’ll tell you later shake of his head and hurried off to his own rehearsal, to make his own bow and formal apology. Didn’t Sun-young understand that it wasn’t only herself she inconvenienced, lying like this?!

His own class as a student was a welcome escape. He preferred dancing to teaching, though dancing alone didn’t pay enough to give Sun-young the life he wanted for her. The modern dance class was a welcome relief for him, allowing him to step outside his anger and frustration and find peace through motion directed by a rotating roster of incredibly talented choreographers.

He hoped Sun-young was moved to understand the gravity of her actions without further lecturing and looked for signs of it when her class ended and she came to sit in the corner of his studio to watch the tail end of his longer class. If so, she didn’t say anything when they moved together to a different studio to the Contemporary class he taught. She just settled in a corner to do her homework in the break she had until Yoongi came by with dinner, after which she’d have her extra rehearsal with Hoseok to work on her solo while Jimin taught a conditioning class. They’d get home around 9 and then right to bed because Friday was another school day, and Jimin’s longest rehearsal and work day. 

He’d noticed Hoseok standing by the door as Jimin’s Contemporary class wrapped up, but he thought Yoongi might have just sent the takeout up with him, as he often did if he managed to catch someone outside while delivering their standing Thursday evening takeout order.

“Good work, dancers, see you all next week,” Jimin called, high-fiving students as they bustled past him to grab their bags and head home to the parents lining the halls. Sun-young was gone from her corner and Hoseok was still by the door, motioning Jimin over.

“Did she already head up?” Jimin asked Hoseok. 

Hoseok gave him a pained expression and admitted, “I don’t think I’ll be able to work with her tonight.”

“Why? Something came up?”

Hoseok clearly braced himself, leaning close as he explained, “Sun-young didn’t feel like participating in the hiphop class today–”

“Wait, what?”

“Ah, she said she wasn’t feel well and sat on the sidelines–”

Jimin felt that anger bubble up in his chest again. What? He looked around for his daughter but she was nowhere to be seen.

“Is everything all right?” Hoseok asked.

“I don’t know what’s gotten into her,” Jimin groaned. “I don’t understand… she feels fine and she loves your class!”

“Well–”

“If she think she’s can just disrespect your time, hyung, and blow off her solo practice–”

Hoseok gestured gently with his hands, “It’s all right to have an off day. She dances a lot.”

Jimin’s head tilted at what instantly felt like criticism and from an unexpected source. Hoseok and Jimin had grown up dancing together. At Sun-young’s age they’d been taking just as many classes, both of their families working extra hours to raise the tuition for it so that their children could pursue their dreams of dance. He was doing exactly the same for Sun-young. She’d wanted to take these classes! She’d wanted to be a dancer since she was a toddler!

“Because she begged to,” Jimin reminded him. “Probably she’s just tired from doing this extra credit thing at school she doesn’t even need to be doing.”

“If she’s not feeling well, I don’t think dancing is a good idea anyway.”

Jimin bristled. It wasn’t like Hoseok to give him unsolicited parenting advice like this. Was everyone going crazy today? 

Jimin bit back his annoyance because Hoseok was, after all, his closest friend and he didn’t feel like having more apologies to make if he let loose the things in his mind right now. Instead he clapped Hoseok on the arm and agreed,

“You’re right, she can just rest during my class. She and I could clearly use a talk.”

“Sure. I can make up the rehearsal another night once she’s feeling better.”

“Great, thanks.” Jimin wasn’t even consciously aware what he was thanking Hoseok for; he just wanted him to go away. He wanted everyone to go away. He didn’t know what was happening with his daughter but now the students for his last class were filing in and he had to plaster on a smile as he greeted them, greeted their parents.

Sun-young slunk back into the room just as the music started. Obviously she had known Hoseok was coming to rat her out. A few minutes later the food from Yoongi arrived and she scurried away with the bag to eat in the back office. 

Jimin kept up the act for his class. Maybe he was a little sharper with his corrections, but in general he thought he did a good job of compartmentalizing. He’d had to perfect that skill over time. He’d had to figure out how to push through when his wife was dying, because someone still had to pay the bills, and someone still had to raise their daughter, and someone still had to do the dishes, and that was the whole problem, it was only him now. Him and whatever help he could solicit from friends or family, but even that came at a cost: admission of failure, admission of weakness, intrusion on their time and energy. He didn’t want to have to rely on others so much. He felt like losing his wife was a consequence of some bad choice he’d made, some mistake of his own, and only a very good therapist and his desire to keep Sun-young’s suffering to a minimum had enabled him to accept the help he already relied on.

Afterwards Sun-young had her things ready to go. They were twin storm clouds for the bus ride home, faces set at the same glower, eyes narrowed the same degree, occasional sigh the same weight. He didn’t want a public discussion anymore than she did. Their feet were heavy on the stairs, the elevator ride tense between them in opposite corners. 

Inside their home, they set their bags down, Jimin hung his keys and slipped his wallet into the bowl by the door, and then began,

“What made you decide to just not participate–”

“How could you come into my classroom to get me?!” she immediately interrupted, whirling on him with unexpected fury for a nine year old. 

“Excuse me? I’m your father! I can go to your school–”

“We agreed on the bike rack!”

“That was before you lied to me and forged my signature on a club form!”

“But you wouldn’t have signed it!”

He brushed past her in the apartment, picking up coats and hats that had slipped from the hooks just to have something to do with his hands as he argued, “That doesn’t mean you just sign it. Forging a signature is a felony!”

“No… no it’s not, you’re just my dad,” she stammered.

He regretted that angle and quickly corrected, “I’m not saying you’re going to jail, I’m saying that it’s wrong. And what, you didn’t think I’d notice that you would be an hour late to meet me twice a week?!”

“I lost track of time…”

“You can’t lose track of time. We go to the studio the same time every day–”

“Well I don’t want to go to the studio,” Sun-young shouted, crossing her arms, then instead throwing her hands to the side. “I don’t want to do hiphop or ballet or my solo or anything. I hate dance! I don’t ever want to dance again!”

It felt like she’d slapped him. It was counter to everything he’d ever known about his daughter. He didn’t know which was more shocking, that she would shout at him like this, or that she’d say she hated the thing that had been a driving shared passion for them both since she could walk. 

“You don’t mean that,” he said more gently.

“Yes I do! I’m sick of dance! Everything we do is dance! Every day we dance and I’m tired of it, maybe I want to do other things!”

“Everything worth doing is hard,” he corrected. “You can’t just quit because it’s hard. Are you worried about your solo?”

“NO.”

“Well you don’t have to worry about your grade, your science grade isn’t a problem. Do you know how many kids would love for their parents to tell them that? Not to worry about their science grade? You’re lucky and you shouldn’t forget that. You have no right to be so disrespectful to me or to Hobi or Miss Kwan or Mr.--”

“Lucky?” Sun-young repeated. “Lucky?! I don’t have a mom and everyone thinks you’re gay because you dye your hair and wear too much jewelry and you don’t even date, all you do is dance. You don’t even care about me, all you care about is dance! Eomma’s the only one who loved me!”

“Park Sun-young! That isn’t true. That’s not true!” he shouted, following after her as she fled to her room. She slammed the door years before he was prepared to deal with door slamming. 

He felt like he was losing control of this situation. He’d already lost control. This was supposed to be about her lying and forgery, not about dance and certainly not about whether she was loved. They were both too upset to be talking about anything right now though. He needed to find the inner peace Subin would have brought to a situation like this but he couldn’t find it right now, as he let his forehead rest against her door, hand on the knob, and drew in deep, jagged breaths. 

Where had all this anger come from in his daughter?! Where had his sweet little daddy’s girl gone?! Sun-young had been pulling away from him for a while and Hanbyul had reassured him it was ok but this didn’t feel ok.

“Sunnie,” he said, trying to keep the tremble from his voice. He needed to be strong here. Firm. Fatherly. “That’s not true, what you said. I love you more than anything and anyone in the entire world.” Silence met him through the door. Belatedly the things she’d said started to poke through his anger: everyone thinks you’re gay because you dye your hair… What the fuck? Where was this coming from? How the hell was he supposed to talk to her about masculinity and… and what the patriarchy? He wasn’t gay but if he was, there was nothing wrong with that, so why did it matter anyway? Why had that suddenly come up in the middle of this? Who was even saying that? He was overwhelmed not only by this new feeling that he couldn’t understand her daughter, but also that he did not understand the world of her day at school, her social life, her inner mind. He used to know everything…

“Sunnie, can I come in?” he asked, letting more of his anger ride the hot breath out of his flared nostrils. Calm calm find your calm, she’s your daughter, let love override the anger and confusion. 

“No.”

He gritted his teeth. It was hard, in a moment like this. He wanted to barge in and make her listen. But that had never worked with Subin, it didn’t work with him, and he knew in his heart it wouldn’t work with Sun-young either. He didn’t know what would work, but he could at least hold himself enough through his anger to respect this boundary. He hoped it was the right thing to do.

“All right. I’m here to talk when you’re ready.”

He stepped back and waited. He expected her to creep towards the door and peek out within a couple of seconds. Minutes at most. 

She didn’t. 

Instead he heard her turn on music, one of those idol groups she liked so much, and he felt effectively walled off. 

Well fine, he had his own coping mechanisms. Sort of. Not alcohol, he’d sworn that off when Subin died, too afraid of sinking into that relief when his daughter needed him. And not dance right now since their apartment was too small. It would have been nice if he could meet Jungkook at the gym but that would mean he needed someone to watch Sun-young –

Ah, would it be bad if he asked Hanbyul? He just needed to get out and cool down for a little bit. Get his head on straight so he could figure out how to get to the bottom of this with Sun-young. Clearly something was up with her. Maybe he ought to reach out to her old counselor again, see if they should start meeting again. Maybe he ought to look into joint therapy? A parental counselor? God, wasn’t there someone who could just come in and tell him what was going wrong and how to fix it?! 

Well, Hanbyul had said to come by any time, and she’d never seemed to resent him for a last minute favor, bless her. It made him feel better already to pull on his gym shoes and grab his bag and shoot Jungkook a text about meeting up. 

He knocked at Sun-young’s door and called, “Hey, sweetheart, I’m going to go to the gym for a bit, ok? I’m going to have Hanbyul come sit with you for a while. Ok? You know you can talk to her too if you want.” Silence. “I just need to move a bit, ok? But we can talk when I get home.” Silence. “I need you to answer so I know you’re ok in there or I’ll come in.”

“Fine.”

He sighed at her terse response and felt his frustration bubble again. Back on mission for his gym date with Jungkook, he slung his gym bag over his shoulder and left his apartment door open so Sun-young wouldn’t be totally alone as he knocked on Hanbyu’s door.

Oddly, she opened the door only a second later, like she’d predicted he was on his way. Jimin stepped back and began,

“Hey, Hanbyul, would it be all right if…” 

He trailed off, gaze raking down her body. Hanbyul was most definitely not in her normal Thursday evening attire. It was almost nine, which for Hanbyul usually meant her business clothes were traded for casual, usually lounge pants and a t-shirt, sometimes a cardigan, every once in a while a sundress over a t shirt. Hanbyul wasn’t very fashion-conscious which gave her style a sweet sincerity to it; she seemed to just buy and wear what she liked. One of a hundred reasons Jimin felt like she was a great role model to have in Sun-young’s life.

Right now though, Hanbyul was dressed very differently. She was just pulling on a light pink coat over a fitted black dress riding up her thighs with the lift of her arms. Her jewelry was simple but the dangling earrings caught the light with her hair pulled back into a low bun except for a couple tendrils around her face with more makeup than he was used to seeing her wear.

“Uh…” 

She blinked at him, then nudged Hudu back into the apartment as he tried to sneak by. Belatedly Jimin realized he should have crouched down to say hello to his favorite boy but he was too shocked at seeing Hanbyul so unlike her usual self. 

“Jimin-ssi?” she pressed when he just blinked at her. 

“Oh, yeah, um… are you going somewhere?” he asked as she pulled the door shut with a click. She had a little purse in her arm. He didn’t even know she owned a little purse; she’d always seemed more like the “practical bag” sort of woman. She even had on heels, which put her just above him heightwise, an excellent angle to see how extra warm her brown eyes looked in the yellowish hallway lighting.

Hanbyul looked sheepish, endearingly nervous, before she gave a decisive nod, “Yes, I have a date.”

“Oh!” Jimin took a step backwards as though he’d been infringing on her date by his presence. “Oh, um… wow. A Thursday night, huh? Must be serious?”

“It’s just late dinner and drinks…”

“Very late,” he mused, looking at his wrist, but he didn’t have a watch on. Realizing how stuffy and old he sounded, he quickly amended, “I mean, that’s great though! Thursday night! Sorry, some of us are old and tired, can’t keep up with um, youth.”

“You’re not old and tired,” she smiled. Ah, he felt very old and tired suddenly, standing in front of her in his gym clothes with his ratty bag and a daughter who was pissed at him. The fight with Sun-young felt like a ball of spikes in his stomach now. Something about Hanbyul looking so nice heading out on a Thursday night date made him feel so…

“Ah, I am. Ok, well have a good time! I hope it, uh, goes well! A new guy or– I mean, you don’t have to tell me anything,” he laughed. “I’m just a neighbor!”

Hanbyul had mercy and gave him that polite smile again, because she was always so polite, and assured him, “Second date. Wish me luck!”

“Yeah, good luck!”

“Oh but did you need something?”

“No no. Um… no, nothing important. Maybe Sun-young and I can– no, later, I don’t want to make you late. Have fun! Stay safe! Be careful, ok? Call me if you need a rescue!”

Hanbyul smiled and waved her hand, “He’s a friend of a friend, I think I’ll be all right.”

Jimin didn’t know what to say to that. Just gave her an awkward wave and glanced over his shoulder as she headed for the elevator. He didn’t miss her little smile as the doors opened, as if she expected her date to be waiting for her inside. She had a little skip in her step.

Well. Good for her! Hanbyul was obviously an incredible woman and she deserved a great date. A great relationship! Jimin had never known her to go on a date before! He thought she was just career focused or something but good for her!

Less good for him. As he closed his door and let his gym bag drop to the floor, he recalled why he’d gone there in the first place. She couldn’t help him solve his problems –not that they were her problems to help with anyway. Probably it was better she’d had something to remind him that he couldn’t just go running to dump on her and drag her into this mess every time something went wrong. His daughter, his family, his deal to figure out.

“Unnie?”

Jimin looked up with surprise as Sun-young came around the corner, clearly expecting Hanbyul to be the one here. Jimin wasn’t sure he’d ever heard Sun-young call Hanbyul ‘Unnie’ before. The disappointment was clear on Sun-young’s face though when she saw her father standing there.

“She can’t come over after all. Just me,” he said.

Without a word, Sun-young turned on her heel. Her door closed a moment later. Yeah, great, what other ways could Jimin disappoint his daughter?

So who… who should he talk to? Who could he talk to? He felt so hopeless in that moment, not sure how to figure out what was going on, not sure how to be the father Sun-young needed, not even sure how to soothe himself in the moment. Wasn’t it supposed to get easier as Sun-young got older? He felt like his family was crumbling all over again. 

He should call his parents. He’d call them tomorrow. He felt like something was dangling, he couldn’t explain it any differently, and it left him not sure what to say to anyone, even his own sweet parents. They’d just worry. Probably they’d tell him to move home again. 

Jimin checked his phone. Jungkook had answered saying he couldn’t go to the gym anyway. He had a message from Hobi asking if he and Sun-young were ok and Jimin didn’t know how to respond. His email had some messages from parents about classes, about the recital, about the dress rehearsal or the costumes. There was an email from Miss Kwan with information about the Science Club –the last thing Jimin wanted to think about right now.

Life was a flurry of activity and sometimes he felt like he was standing still in the middle of it. Sometimes Sun-young stood with him but she wasn’t right now, she was in motion, and he wasn’t sure how to catch her as she moved further and further away and he just stood there, alone. It wasn’t his daughter’s job to keep him from feeling alone, he knew that. But it wasn’t anyone’s job. 

Should he date?

The thought of meeting anyone new and introducing them into his family sounded god-awful. No. No no. That was a worse suggestion than moving home to his parents. Besides, it wouldn’t be just dating, it would be finding a second mother for Sun-young… she wouldn’t want another mother. The last thing he ever wanted to do was make Sun-young feel like Subin had been erased.

Jimin’s thoughts were a jumble. Without knowing what else to do, he stalked to his room, closed the door, and turned on music, each Park bubbled in their own preferred genre.

Hanbyul’s date had gone shockingly well. So well, in fact, that as she fell asleep grinning that night, it was only the tiniest bit because of the shocked way Jimin had looked at her wearing that dress. It wasn’t even anything that fancy. She’d had it for a long time and was surprised to find it even still fit. She’d felt pretty. Her date had thought she looked pretty, and been very openly appreciative of it, but in a polite way. Maybe Jimin had too, he’d looked like he wanted to ask her something and then forgotten–

No. Jimin didn’t matter. They were just neighbors, like he’d said! This Kim Namjoon guy seemed incredible and Hanbyul looked forward to finding out if he was too good to be true. They already had a second date set for Saturday evening, “So I can take you to dinner at a more reasonable hour, I swear I don’t make a habit of this, I just thought it would be fun to have our first date at this restaurant opening –the head chef is a friend of mine.”

He was right, it was fun. Great view. Hanbyul looked forward to seeing the same view again soon. 

Could she really have looked so good in such a simple dress that she flustered him? 

Namjoon, not Jimin, obviously. Obviously!

“Don’t worry, Hudu,” she whispered, pulling the snoring pup closer. “I already asked right away. Namjoon loves dogs too. I think our luck might be finally changing!”

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#jimin ff #jimin x oc #park jimin fanfic #dad jimin #bts fanfiction #bts fluff #jimin smut #jimin fluff #jimin fic #jimin fanfic #single dad jimin #after the applause #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin x oc #jimin fanfiction

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Umbra (part two)

Pairing: Demon Jimin x female Angel reader

Summary: Going to a demon for help was the last thing you expected to do but when it’s your only chance to find your soul mate, you have no choice. Even when that demon was your long term rival.

Genre: Soulmate au / Fantasy au / Demons and Angels / Strangers to lovers / Drabble series / Angst / Fluff / Smut

Rating: 18+ (NSFW)

Warnings: Mentions of demons / Demon magic / Mentions of hell / Severed animals heads / Mentions of sex and sexual implications / Pervert Demon Seokjin / Mentions of scarring / Hints at previous fights

W/C: 2.7k

Beta: @sun-kore​ thank you so much for your help and your kind words.

Banner: Moodboard by me.

Taglist: @jungkooksbroski​ @hotdamnchimchim​ @clouditae​ @ggukkieland​

Notes: This one has been a really long time coming. Now that I'm getting back into the swing of writing, I'm trying to go back through my WIPS and actually finish them! I’ve already started part three of this series, so if you like the second part, please do let me know.

Staring up at the pawn shop sign, wondering how on earth you ended up here, a notorious demon's cover for his dark magic exploits, you'd never set foot in here in your wildest dreams, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So you force one foot in front of the other and make your way inside; a bell jingles as the door closes. You survey the many trinkets scattering the shelves, searching for any sign of life.

"I'll be right with you." A deep, gravelly voice sounds directly behind you. 

You spin around, but you're met with nothing but empty air. A dark chuckle sounds around you, making the hair on the back of your neck stand on end.

"Well, well, well, I must say I haven't received news that hell has frozen over." The rough voice sounds again. You turn to see him fully materialised before you, the broad-shouldered fiend himself, Seokjin.

"Believe me, I never thought I'd cross paths with you again."

He smirks and drifts towards you. "Ah yes, the last time wasn't so pleasant for me." His fingers skate across the scar that patterns his neck and creeps up his jaw. A lightning bolt of puckered skin created by you.

"But I have to admit, I am a sucker for your pretty face, and it has filled my dreams at night ever since our meeting." His fingers gently tuck your hair behind your ear, his digits managing not to touch you but still sending a sickly shiver along your spine.

"That makes you a very serious masochist." You reply, impatience forming a hot pit in your chest, threatening to erupt.

A seductive smile stretches his plump lips. "Mmmm, indeed."

"I'm here because I need your help." You add quickly, interrupting his hungry gaze that wanders across your body.

He freezes, eyes popping slightly before laughter bellows out from him. "You must be desperate if you've come to me. But, I'm sorry," he composed himself, "I find your misfortune pleases me somewhat." 

You roll your eyes. "Thanks. Now, are you going to help me or not."

"Just straight to it, no foreplay, no warm-up, nothing, um?" He looks at you, a cheeky glint in his eyes. "But I wonder, what are you willing to bargain for in exchange for my help?"

 He closes the remaining gap between you, his hand winding around your waist and pressing your body against his.

 "How far are you willing to go?"

Your smoky tendrils wrap around his wrists and ankles keeping him in place and unable to move. "I'm willing to not shop you in and let you continue practising your dark magic off the radar. That's what I'm offering." You say through gritted teeth, every fibre of your being coiled and tense, ready to spring.

He moans at your magical grip on him. "I love it when you talk dirty."

You snake extra tendrils around his throat and squeeze, cutting off his air supply. "Or I could just get rid of you myself and find another low-life demon to help me. One who will keep his hands to himself."

His reddening face manages a smile and a nod. You release him. The gasp of air he takes fills the tense silence in the room.

"Ok, ok." He says between breaths. "Can't blame a guy for trying, right?" Winking at you, his hand comes up to his neck,  massaging the red mark you've left there. He smooths his hair back and takes a breath.

 "What is it I can do to assist you?"

His face flashes behind your eyes for a moment, smooth skin, piercing eyes, and that perfect smile you got only a glimpse at. "I need to find someone."

Seokjin stares at you before waving his hand in a 'continue' motion. "I need more to go on, love."

"A demon has disappeared, and I need you to tell me where he is."

His face turns serious. "You want me to help you find one of your marks." He scoffs.

"He's not a mark. This is personal." Your eyebrows knit together, attempting to keep the desperation out of your voice.

His eyes narrow at you. "Then why? Angels don't mix with demons for the fun of it. So you expect me to believe you won't turn him in or kill him?"

You sigh and rub your temples. "You can believe what you want; nevertheless, I need this demon, but he disappeared right before me a few days ago, and I've been unable to find him."

He chuckles. "Sounds like he's not interested, dear."

"He didn't dissolve. He literally disappeared. He was right in front of me one moment; next, he was gone."

Seokjin frowns. "Now, this has piqued my interest."

He walks to the shop door, locks it, and turns the closed sign face out. 

"Come." 

He beckons you to the back of the store with a crooked finger, leading you out through a thin veil curtain. The dark green material billows around you and paves the way to a dark staircase, unnaturally so. You take hesitant steps down, your heart beating harder with every movement descending into the inky abyss.

A loud click and dim light illuminates everything in the basement and leaves enough shadows for your eyes to search for danger.

"Come and sit." He points to the large wooden table in the centre of the room.

You stop in your tracks, however, when you notice the seemingly real but very dead animals attached to various parts of the walls. They were slightly decayed, skin discoloured and disintegrating, yet there was no smell in the air or flies around. The magic aura surrounding it was an impressively powerful one. You sit on one of the chairs, fingertips grazing the scorch marks etched dark and deep into the grain of the old oak. You sift through them, running a finger over the demonic runes and curses which cover the tabletop.

"Now, demons don't just disappear." Seokjin starts, standing beside you, "and it doesn't sound like he was banished. Was there any smoke or a mark on the floor once he'd disappeared?"

You shook your head. "No, I was staring him right in the face, and it was like I blinked, and he was gone."

Seokjin watches you carefully, eyes narrowed and suspicious. Finally, he sits down, leaning back in his chair, stroking his chin with his long crooked fingers, nails black and scorched from the dark magic.

"How long have we known each other, angel? Ninety years?"

You shrug, your knee bouncing impatiently, but you force it down, clasping your knees together. "Give or take."

"Hm," he nods. "I know there is something you're not telling me. But believe me when I say I cannot help you unless you tell me everything." 

Sighing, you rub your burning, tired eyes. "Fine." Pulling your sleeve roughly and slamming your arm on the table for him to see. 

Your soul-mate mark was now a glowing white, illuminating your arm against the dark wooden backing. 

"Ah, you've found your mate; how sweet." He mocks. "And let me guess, this demon has kidnapped your new mate, and once you find him, you'll exact revenge, yada, yada, yada. Am I close?" He leans forward, resting both arms on the table. 

Your chest burns with the acid rising up from your churning stomach, unable to believe the words you are about to utter. "The demon is my mate."

It takes you a few moments in the silence that follows that statement to look at Seokjin, but when you do, his wide-eyed frozen face is almost enough to amuse you. The longer the silence stretches on, the more deafening it becomes, and with your current state of mind, you can't cope much longer.

"Seokjin, we're wasting time."

He snaps out of it, confused eyes focused on yours and mirroring your own mixed feelings in the glassy black optics. "I, um, I have some questions."

Your breath leaves in a frustrated huff.

His hands come up in a defensive position. "I'm sorry, but this is very new for me. In all my years, I've never heard of this happening… inter-species mating…permanently. Not even a whisper of it, and trust me, the things I have been privy to about our worlds, I could shock you."

"I doubt that. Not many things shock me about your world or mine anymore."

"Ah," he leans in, one perfectly pointed eyebrow sharp and raised straight for you, like an accusatory dagger. "But this little scenario did, did it not?" He stretches out and strokes his bent finger across your mark, making bile rise and anger alight your veins. 

You grab his wrist and twist it fast, but he's faster, grabbing your other wrist with his free hand and turning it hard enough that with one more movement, it would snap.

"We appear to be at a stalemate, sweetheart." 

Your teeth snap shut, an attempt to control some of your anger but also as a preventive to not let him know how much pain he's inflicting. 

"Are you going to help me or not? I don't have time for games." You spit.

He smirks, eyes fiery with lust and mistaken superiority. "Yes, I'll help. Purely now, because I have my own questions that need answering."

"Well, get in line, buster."

He laughs and releases the grip on your wrist. In return, you do the same, sitting down quickly before you change your mind about breaking some part of him. God, he'd be a dead man if you didn't need him.

"If we're going to…go all the way," he can't help the smile that tugs at one side of his mouth. "I'm going to need a little bit of trust. Can you do that?" 

You scoff. "Can you promise you won't touch me again?"

He sucks in a slow, deep breath. "I'll try my hardest, angel, but you need to give me something to think about on those nights I wake up from dreams of you." 

You feel your top lip turn up into an uncontrollable grimace. "Have I not hurt you enough today, already?"

His deep cackle vibrates through you as he strokes the wrist you just released. "With you, it would never be enough." But then he mimes, making a cross against his heart. 

"That would mean something if you had one in there." You jibe.

He holds the place on his chest where one should be, as if you've wounded him. "Ouch. Uncalled for."

Rolling your eyes, you shrug out of your jacket, sensing you are here for the long run, and ignore his eyes on your body as you do so.

"Ok, let's find this demon, shall we?" His bright smile unnerves you. "I need you to put your palms on the table, close your eyes and picture his face in your mind. Can you do that?"

You give a curt nod and do as he says, even if every fibre of your being screams against it.

The scorch markings under your palms feel strange as the sweat on your hands makes you stick to the table. You peek out of one eye at Seokjin to see him mirroring your stance, eyes wholly shut. He could almost look handsome with his usual smug face impassive…almost.

"Close your eyes." He orders, making you squeeze them shut tight and fight the smile that threatens beneath the surface.

You focus your mind and think of only him. Seems crazy to think you're bound to someone, and yet, you don't even know his name.

His face appears behind your eyelids, perfect smooth skin that practically glows. Plump lips that stretch into an exhaustingly beautiful smile and dark eyes like crescent moons. You see the way his blonde hair moves in the hint of a breeze, the curve of his Adams apple as he swallows. You're eager to reach out and touch his throat, sliding your fingers down his skin, wondering if it would feel like silk under your touch.

A noise interrupts the eerie silence, a low hum in the air. The palms of your hands start to burn as the marks on the table grow hotter, the air feeling thick and heavy around you, static, making your hair stand on end, but you ignore it, shoving it down and focusing just on the picture in your mind. 

"There you are…" you hear Seokjin whisper, so eager to open your eyes but daring not to in case the spell breaks and your chance of finding him diminishes. "What on earth?" 

"What?" You whisper, unable to contain the impatience.

Your hair falls down around your face, and the heat underneath your hands subsides, the wood feeling cold and the silence deafening once again.

"I found him." Seokjin's deep voice sounds into the quiet, barely a whisper but seeming louder than ever. 

"And?" You lean forward on the edge of the chair, waiting for his next words.

He finally meets your eyes, a sombre look deep in the onyx orbits staring back at you. "He's in hell."

You frown and shake your head. "What does that even mean?"

"I mean that very literally, love. He's in hell. That's where you'll find him." 

You stare blankly at the demon in front of you, so many questions race through your mind leaving you unable to focus on any particular one. 

How is this possible? Was he banished by someone? How can you get him? An angel in hell is almost unheard of…not since…

"You want my suggestion?" Seokjin breaks your wild thoughts. "If it was me? I'd leave him there, life-mate or not."

You push away from the table, ready to leave, not wanting to hear anything that won't help you.

"But…" he continues, and something in his voice makes your feet stop, wanting to hear his following words. "I know you won't be able to do that, so...I'll help you."

You turn, eyes narrowed suspiciously. "For a price?"

He smiles, "everything has a price sweetheart."

"Name it."

He stands and strides slowly toward you. Your body tense, ready to run or fight, a natural instinct you can't unlearn. His hand comes up to your face, hesitating for a moment, searching your eyes for permission. Then, for a moment, he seems to soften, his eyes almost pleading before his nonchalant mask returns, and his hand drops without touching you.

"You leave me and my shop alone for good." 

You breathe a sigh of relief. Of course, that would be what he wants. And that you could give him.

"And when I say you, I mean all of you." 

Now that is a little harder; there’s a long list of angels and other species who hunt delinquents, some for work and some for sport. Getting the other angels to Ignore his dealings would be a hard sell, but maybe his helping of an angel return safely from the depths of hell could work in his favour.

"Provided we return safely?" You press.

He nods, his eyes wild like a cat preparing to pounce on a mouse.

"Deal."

You put your hand out, and he eagerly takes it, lifting it to his mouth and inhaling your scent deeply. He moans, the sound turning your stomach but annoyance overrides it. When you feel his lips touch your skin, you snatch your hand away and storm up the basement stairs.

"What, no ‘thank you’?" He calls out.

"Thanks." You mumble as you slam the basement door shut.

You feel his breath against your ear, knowing full well if you turned, he wouldn't be there. "Be here tomorrow at two am." 

The shiver it sends down your spine makes your feet move faster to leave the building, and as soon as that door closes behind you, you finally feel like you can breathe again.

You absentmindedly rub the back of your hand; an irritation persists, and when you look down, to see a dark mark where his lips touched the skin, all around it red and sore. The sight makes you want to race back in there and rip those lips right off his face, but the sound of his laughter from inside, knowing he's watching you still, made you want to get away as soon as possible. You stick your middle finger up and march in the direction of home. 

#bangtanarmynet #thebtswritersclub #kvanity #bts #bangtan sonyeondan #bangtan #bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #bts jimin #bts park jimin #park jimin #jimin #bts jimin x reader #bts jimin fanfiction #bts jimin fanfic #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin fanfic #jimin fanfiction #jimin fanfic #demon jimin #demon au #soulmate au #strangers to lovers #angels and demons #bts soulmate au #bts strangers to lovers au #bts demon au

[bteezxyewriter12]

My Perfect Everything

Pairing- Jimin x Named Reader

Word count- 2.6k

Includes- Jimin is insecure, reader is reassuring, sex, missionary, riding, love making, multiple orgasms, fluff

Masterlists- check out for more fics

📝Masterlists 📝 BTS Masterlist

📝Jimin Masterlist

J POV

Movement next to me wakes me out of the nice deep and comfortable sleep I was in

I feel myself being put on my side of the bed

I don't want that

I want to be in his arms

I half open my eyes and grab his hand before he can fully get up

"I'm sorry I woke you up princess. Go back to sleep ok?"

"Where are you going?", I ask groggily

"To the gym baby"

The gym?

Seriously?

What the hell time is it?

Lifting my head, I look at the time on my alarm clock

5 am

He's going to the gym at 5am?

Is he fucking joking?

"Min it's way too early. You just went to sleep at like two baby"

"I know, princess but I have to go."

I force myself to sit up

"Why do you have to go? You're on a break baby. There's no performances or events you have to go to. You can go later if you really want to. At, you know, a reasonable time"

He shakes his head, "I have to baby if I want to keep my abs and muscles"

My sleepy brain is taking a slow time absorbing everything

"But your...uh... ARMYS aren't going to see you or your abs Min. Why does it matter if you have them now? You never cared about maintaining them before when you weren't performing"

I've known him for a few years, since I met him when I worked at HYBE when it used to be BigHit

On off times, he's not so obsessed with working out or having abs

"I know but I need them"

Ok something is wrong

There's something he's not telling me

"Jimin, what are you talking about? Why do you need them? What's wrong?"

He shakes his head, "Nothing's wrong"

I move, sitting in front of him

Touching his gorgeous face, I gently turn it to me

"Baby what's wrong? I know you Jimin. Something is off"

He looks down, confirming my suspicion

"Baby you can tell me anything. You know that right?"

He nods

"So tell me. Why do you think you need abs and muscles?"

"For you", he says, looking up at me slowly

Me?

Why me?

When have I ever said he needs to have abs or muscles?

"I don't understand Min. What does working out and getting muscles have to do with me?"

"Because it's how you know me. When we got together, I had abs and muscles for the performances and I never let them go away."

I don't know what to say

I'm still processing what he said

Is he saying that he kept working out like a madman the entire year we've been together because he thinks I want him to have abs?

That's insane

"I'm scared", he says

My eyebrows furrow together, "Scared? Of what baby?"

"That you won't want me if I don't have them. That you won't be happy or attracted to me"

That is absolutely insane

And completely one hundred percent untrue

"Jimin no baby", I shake my head, "I don't care if you have abs or muscles or not"

"You don't?"

"No baby. Why would you think that?"

He gives a little shrug, "Because all girls like it? ARMYS do. They always want me to have abs"

That's not true

He's just listening to the ARMYS who are superficial

"Jimin, ARMYS don't care if you have abs or not. The ARMYS that say they care about that are superficial and just care about your looks. You don't have to have abs for anyone", I tell him, "And I'm not like all girls baby. I don't care about that"

He hesitates, then speaks, "Are you sure? You're not...not just saying that to make me feel better?"

Moving closer, I put my arms around his neck

"No Min. I'm not just saying that. I truly don't care ok? I love you Jimin. You. Not your abs or muscles. They have nothing to do with you"

His eyes are wide, his mouth hanging open a teeny bit

I'm wondering why he's looking like me like that when he says, "You love me?"

Oh my god, did I say that out loud?

By the look on his face I did

And it doesn't matter

I do love him

I've been so worried about telling him but now that it's out I'm not going to deny it

Cupping his cheek, I smile softly, "Yes Park, Jimin, I love you"

His mouth drops more and my god he's adorable

"I love everything about you. How cute you are, how sweet. How caring and loving. How funny. How romantic you are. How hard working, how giving, how amazing you are with the guys.", I tell him

He's looking at me like he can't believe I see all these things in him

"I love your beautiful brown eyes Min. You're gorgeous smile that lights up my day. You completely adorable crooked front teeth. You're cute pouty kissable lips."

I give him a soft kiss, then continue, "And you know what baby?"

He shakes his head

"Your abs and muscles you're so worried about are on the bottom of my list of things I love about you. Because I'll keep loving you without them. You are the first person I ever fell in love with and I'm not letting you go. You're my perfect everything just the way you are"

Tears prick the corner of his eyes and I move my fingers to wipe them away

"I much rather be with you, sleeping in your arms, cuddling with you than have you leave to work out for abs that don't matter"

He smiles softly, his fingers running in my hair, "I love you"

My heart bursts in happiness

"Yeah?", I ask shyly

"Yeah Jo. I was worried about telling you but I'm so in love with you. You're everything to me."

I smile happily, "I love you"

"I love you", he repeats

"Stay with me baby", I ask

He nods, "Always princess"

He lays back down and I move to cuddle him

He puts his arm around me as I lay my head on his chest, then move my leg over him and nuzzling against his neck, smelling his perfect scent

His fingers move in my hair, playing and relaxing me

"I love you", I tell him, hearing his heartbeat

"I love you baby. So much"

I'm so ridiculously happy

To hear him, the Park, Jimin from BTS say he loves me, he's in love with me is surreal

Out of all the girls he could have possibly chosen he picked me

A staff member

A nobody

I'm extremely lucky

I know I am, I will never deny that

He's just everything and I'm just me

"What are you thinking about?", he asks me

"Huh?"

"You're eyes aren't closed baby. You're just staring into space. That means you're thinking"

"How do you know that?", I ask

I do tend to stare into space as I think

I just didn't think he noticed

"Because I know you princess. I know everything about you"

I feel my cheeks heat up listening to him

I'm glad he knows me so well

"So what are you thinking baby?", he repeats

"Just how lucky and happy I am that you love me"

"It's not luck baby. You just are everything I ever wanted and more. Perfect for me"

"Do you really mean that?"

It's just so mind-blowing that he actually loves me

"Baby, look at me"

I lift my head, moving my gaze slowly to him

"I mean every word", he says softly, gently touching my cheek, "I love you more than anything. I've never been in love before either but I fell for you so damn quickly. You really are perfect"

I can't help but smile at him

"I love you Jo. Don't ever doubt it. Ever"

I nod, "I won't"

"Good"

"You don't forget that I love you. Not your abs, not your muscles. You"

He nods, "I won't baby. I promise"

He leans his head down, his lips against mine in a kiss

Falling into his kiss, he holds me to him as he gently rolls us, moving on top of me

Getting his shirt off, I throw one arm around his neck, playing with his hair

I love playing with his hair

Right now it's black and long enough for him to put it in a ponytail

And great for holding and pulling during sex, which happens to be a kink of his

I found that Jimin has a lot of kinks that I love to play into

Jimin's hands run down my body to my pj shorts, pulling them and my panties down, then taking my pj top off

I use my free hand to pull on his pj pants

"Off. Now"

He moves to his knees, getting out of his bottom clothes, his lips and tongue never leaving mine

He moves on top of me, his big thick cock sliding inside so easily

I moan in his mouth, my arms around his neck as he settles on top of me, his warm skin against mine

His arms move around me and I feel so safe

I always feel safe in his arms, safe with him

His hips start moving, pulling back then rolling into mine, his length filling me over and over again so slowly, pleasure all over me

He kisses me senseless as her moves, his thick cock opening me again and again, the stretch around him feeling so blissful

I clench on him hard, wanting him to stay inside and he groans so loudly, his hand dropping to my hip and holding on hard

Running my fingers up and down his back, I feel his skin tremble against mine

I love that and he's told me he loves it too

His lips break from mine as soon as his head hits my spot, a loud moan escaping my mouth, his mouth on my neck planting kisses all over

He moves so slowly and I can feel everything

His sweat on me, the way his back muscles move, the feel of his huge length inside me, every throb his cock makes, his hand on my hip

And his lips

Fuck I feel every single kiss he lovingly presses into my skin, never wanting him to stop

Moving my hand, I take his that's not on my hip and lace our fingers together, kissing the back of his hand

He lifts his head from my neck, smiling, then kisses the back of my hand

Grinding into me, the pleasure is so much and I'm so close, throbbing rapidly around him

He leans down to my ear and whispers, "I love you"

And that's it

Falling over the edge, I moan his name, the bliss so fucking good

"Jimin", I whimper

"I love you so much my baby", he whispers

"I love you Jimin", I cry, holding onto him, riding out the pleasure on his shaft that he kept inside me when my orgasm started

As my orgasm ends, he moves again, right into my spot, keeping me in pleasure

I feel my body shake against him and I can't stop it

His head lowers, his hand holding my breast up, his mouth around my nipple immediately, sucking softly

And that makes me drench his cock as I'm thrown into another orgasm right away

"Jimin. Baby", I moan, intense pleasure running through me

"You feel so good baby", he groans, his hips not stopping their movements, fucking me through it

When it's over, I breath in hard as he nuzzles into my neck, "Good baby?"

"Amazing", I breathe

It always is amazing

He's amazing

Now it's his turn

I want him to feel the same pleasure he gives me

Gently I push his shoulder and start to sit up, him sitting up too

Then I push him down, climbing in his lap, sitting right on his dick

"Oh baby", he moans as I begin to ride him immediately and slowly with soft bounces

His hands slide up my body from my hips and I close my eyes against his touch

His hands, his fingers feel so good on my skin

I arch into his touch, keeping my hand behind me on his leg as I ride him

His cock is perfect for riding and I'll never get tired of it

"God, you're so beautiful baby", he whispers

Opening my eyes, I find his eyes on me

Not on where we meet which is where his gazes usually is when I'm on top

He loves seeing his cock drenched in my juice, loves watching it disappear inside me

But right now his gaze is on my face, a soft look full of love in his

Love for me

It still blows my mind and I'm so grateful I have his love

His hands haven't stopped traveling along my body, touching the same spots over and over again

I'm so not complaining

I love his hands on me

"Cum for me", he asks

"But you're supposed...", I trail off when he shakes his head

"You first baby. I want to watch you"

I feel myself blush at his words

"Please baby. For me?", he asks and I just nod

I can't deny him anything

And it's not as if I don't want to cum

He feels too good to not

Circling my hips, I grind against him, clenching on him so hard

"Fuck baby, so good", he moans, "Don't stop"

Oh I won't

Not until he cums

His hand moves to my clit, rubbing softly, slowly, increasing the pleasure

"Jimin", I moan, waves of bliss falling over me as I orgasm

"Fuck, so pretty baby girl. I can't....I have to...", he stutters

"Cum Jimin. Please baby, fill me", I cry, wanting nothing more than to feel his cum in me

I fucking love it

"Baby, Jo, fuck yes", he moans

I keep riding him to make it feel better for him, his cock throbbing so pleasurably, his warm cum shooting in me

I watch him in so much pleasure, his eyes closed, his sweaty hair sticking to his forehead, moaning my name

He's so beautiful

He always is

Always so stunning even when he's just sitting and not doing a damn thing

I stop moving when he finishes, his body relaxing in the bed

Leaning over him, I press kiss after kiss all over his face, listening to his adorable chuckle

"I love you Min", I tell him, ending my assault of kisses with one to his plump pink lips

His arms move around my body, kissing me back, his tongue against mine

He rolls to the side, keeping me in his arms, laying next to each other

When the kiss ends, he looks at me, moving my hair behind my ear

"I love you Jo"

I can't help but smile, knowing I'll never get tired of hearing him say it

We cuddle into each other and I'm just content in being in his arms

"Ready to sleep baby?", I ask him

He nods, "Yes baby. I'm so ready, especially with you here and it's so comfortable"

"Good baby. And when we wake up later you need to turn whatever alarm you have on that woke you up at this ungodly hour"

He chuckles, kissing my forehead, "I will baby. I promise"

"Good. Sleep time baby"

"Yes ma'am", he laughs

"I love you Min. So much"

I feel his arms tighten around me, securing me to him

"I love you Jo. More than anything"

He presses a kiss to my lips, the lays his head on his pillow

Closing my eyes, I relax in my love's arms, hoping we can sleep all morning

#ksmutclub #jimin fanfiction #jimin fic #jimin fanfic #jimin smut #park jimin fanfic #park jimin fic #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin smut #bts jimin fic #bts jimin fanfic #bts jimin smut #bts fic #bts fanfic #btsfanfiction #bts smut

[littlemessyjessi]

"Untamed": BTS 8th Member x Park Jimin: Finale!

"Staring Exercise": Finale!

BTS 8th member series Untamed

Park Jimin x Mae Jae

🖤

Scenario: Jae is finally back from her vacation time with her family. As usual,  it's back to business for BTS and their schedules.  Today they are filming and have decided to do the social experiment where you stare into each other's eyes. 

These include the scenarios with Jae and each member.

🖤

Jae took a seat on the stool, running a hand through her hair.

"Oh heck, am I first?" She asked as she turned towards the camera.  "Why is it always me?"

"Because you're the oldest!"

She rolled her eyes as the unmistakable voice of Jin even if she couldn't see him.

"And yet you have no respect for your noona, Seokjin." She laughed.

Internationally,  technically she was six months and it was constant topic between the two of them... even if they were both born in the same year.

So really she wasn't his noona at all. 

But it irked him… so she used it every chance she got. 

He finally made his way into her line of sight with a smirk donning his features.  

"Because you're not my noona. You're only like six months older than me." He said taking a seat across from her.

She rolled her eyes again, "That's still six months more than you."

"Well, at least I look six months younger than you forever." He said.

"Fitting, man child." She said. 

"Namjoon,  mom and dad are fighting again! "

"Be quiet, Hoseok." Jin and Jae said together before bursting into laughter. 

"Ah, the joys of coparenting." Jae said and Jin gave her a long suffering sigh. 

"Do not call me your-"

"So what are me and the baby daddy doing today?" She cut him off.

"Yah!" He complained before he launched into full rage rap. "I am not your baby daddy! I'm too young for children! And I could never spawn with you. Our children would be beautiful but evil! Does this look like the face of someone who can deal with that? How could you do this to me?!"

"Pipe down, baby daddy." She said over the laughter of everyone in the room before turning to the camera man. "Please continue."

"Today we're doing the social experiment of staring into each other's eyes for four minutes.  We're breaking you off into groups and then pairs. Then we'll switch until the eight of you have all had a chance to participate with one another. "

"Aish, whyyyy? She's going to steal my soul." Jin whined and Jae smacked his arm. "See! Abuse!"

Jae rolled her eyes.

"Who do you think will do well with this experience?" The camera asked.

"Suga will hate this." Jin answered.  "He's not so good with eye contact."

"Says the man who compulsively winks if you look at him for more than three seconds. " Jae said.

Jin narrowed his eyes at her, "I loathe you."

"The correct pronunciation is love, dear, but I see that you're already overwhelmed so I'll let it slide." She said before turning back to the camera. "I think Jimin will probably do the best. He's all about eye contact. He gets a little shy sometimes but I think he can do it. Possibly V.  He can stare right into your soul."

"Alright, you two,  please face each other. You're allowed to blink and you may speak to one another.  But you have to keep direct eye contact. Understand?"

The both of them nodded before turning to face each other. 

"Great.  Your time starts when the beep  sounds and an alarm will go off when your time is up."

Jae looked at Jin and he couldn't help but laugh, cracking instantly. 

"Yah!" She yelled at him before turning to the camera. "Do over, please."

The director nodded and the beep sounded again. 

Jae held her fist up at Jin and locked eyes with him.

"You better get it together,  Seokjin." She threatened. 

"Or what?"

"Or I'll unplug your computer in the middle of your game."

His eyes widened comically.

"That's monstrous."

She shrugged, "That's war. So don't test me. You make it through these four minutes with me and I'll buy you cake. You don't and I will make you miserable."

"So violent." He laughed. 

She shrugged again and laughed when he winked at her.

"And so it begins." She said winking back.

"It's my habit. Stop bullying me." He whined.

"Your ears are turning red too." She said. "And your neck.  Oh look, that little vein is starting to pop out!"

"Yah, stop! You're gonna make me fail!" He accused.

"Alright, alright.  So let's talk then, I guess. " she said.

"Did you enjoy your time with your family?" He asked.

"I did. It was very healing. " she said. 

"Good.  You need more of that." He said.

"We all do." She agreed.

"You certainly do. I see how much you put on yourself sometimes." He said.

"Things have to be done and someone needs to do it. " she said.

"But even when you are supposed to be relaxing, I still see you working. Like you never turn it off." He said.

"I guess I have some trouble with that." She said.

"You should do nothing.  Sleep more. Play games. Eat good foods. " he said.

"I'm sure you're right."  She said.  "Maybe I just don't know how."

"I would teach you. " he said.

"I'm sure you would, Jinnie. I appreciate that." She said.

The two of them were quiet again as they stared into each other's eyes.

It was a rare occurrence for them.

They were usually bickering like children. 

There weren't often serious moments between them.

"Hey." He said.

"Hmm?" She asked.

"Thanks." He said. 

"For what?" She asked. 

"For always being there." He said. "When I asked and more importantly when I didn't."

Jae's gaze softened on his.

"Don't mention it.  Thank you. For always helping me even when I fought you every step of the way." She said.

He nodded.

The two of them tapered off into silence again just staring at each other. 

The lingering feeling of mutual respect and care permeating the room.

The timer went off and the two of them blinked. 

"How was that?" The director asked.

"A little intense." Jin said. "I don't think I've ever stared into your eyes like that."

"Did I snatch your soul?" Jae teased.

He patted his chest, "Still seems intact for the moment."

Jae chuckled.

"Jae, how about you?" The director asked.

"I think I feel the same.  It was intense but not necessarily bad." She said.   "We're the 92 liners and the oldest. So I think a lot of the time we've spent back to back or shoulder to shoulder,  ya know. Just ready to take care of the others as a united front."

Jin nodded, "I agree with that.  Because even though we've obviously known each other all this time and had many conversations,  I still don't remember having ever done anything like that. I didn't mind it though."

"Me either." Jae said, turning towards him. "I feel closer to you..."

Jin narrowed his eyes at her, "Don't you da-"

"Baby Daddy."

Jin rolled his eyes before he was sent off to pair with another member and Yoongi entered the room. 

Jae couldn't help but laugh a bit. 

He was already uncomfortable and it showed.

"Who'd they pair you with?" She asked as he took a seat.

"Jiminie." He said. 

Jae burst into laughter before turning to the camera.  "Y'all are wrong for that."

"Why?" The director asked.

"Because you paired the person who hates eye contact with the one who loves it. And his first one? That's cold. " she laughed.

"At Least it ripped the bandaid off." Yoongi said.  "You ready?"

"Damn, boy. You in a hurry?" She asked as they turned towards each other. 

"Just want to get it over with.  It makes me anxious, I guess." He said locking eyes with her as the beep sounded. 

"I guess I can understand that. " she said. "So you wanna sit in silence for four minutes or what?"

"Please God, no." He said, eyes widening. 

Jae laughed, "Well,  then I'm going to take this opportunity to embarrass you."

"Jae, please."

"I am going to use this time to tell you how much I love you because you have to sit here and you can't look away." She smirked. 

"Please have mercy. " he whined.

"I'm serious, Yoon.  I love you.  Like I'm so fucking , oh, shoot, sorry. I didn't mean to curse. " she said, "I just meant I'm really proud of you,  ya know. Like it's more than your professional accomplishments.  I think I'm just really proud to see who you are, ya know." She said.

He sat there staring at her for a bit longer.

His eyes watered and his lip wobbled and he finally cracked.

"Fuck..." he said finally looking away from Jae and the camera.

Jae scooted her chair closer to his and took his hand between hers.

"I'm sorry I made you cry but I mean it.  I love you so much.  You make me so proud to know you."  She whispered.

"I love you too. " he whispered.  "I didn't think this would affect me like this. I'm sorry."

"Well, to be fair, I did punch you in the feels. " she laughed before turning to the camera.  "If we have a penalty for this,  I'll take it.  I did play dirty and thwacked him in the heart."

"Can't believe you. " he laughed. "You knew I just came from a room with Jiminie staring at me like a weirdo and then you do this to me.  You two deserve ea-"

His eyes widened when he realized he almost let it slip but she just patted his hand.

Soon, Yoongi was replaced with Hoseok who looked at her suspiciously. 

"Why does Suga-hyung look like he's been crying?" He asked.

"Because I told him that I loved him." She said.

"Oh." He said.  "Well, I know that you love me."

Jae laughed,  "I don't doubt that. "

"Although with your recent behavior,  I seriously reconsider it." He said. 

"Oh?" She asked.

"It's been three days since I've gotten a kiss on the cheek. Three. Three." He said.  "You deprived me of your love and affection for your entire holiday and then you do this to me."

Jae rolled her eyes at his decision to be theatrical before she leaned forward and grabbed his face and placed a kiss to each cheek and his forehead. 

"Better?" She asked.

"You know, somehow that is a completely different experience when I keep eye contact with you. " He said.  "That's slightly terrifying. "

Jae shook her head and simply passed a hand through his hair.

"I remember when we first started and I was having a lot of trouble sleeping and you'd come over to my bunk and play with my hair until I fell asleep." He said, head leaning into her touch.

"Well you were tired and you needed sleep. We all had a lot on our shoulders back then.  We still do.  It's just different now." She said. 

"I missed my mama so much then." He admitted. "I still do but it was really hard then."

"You're close to your mama." Jae acknowledged.  "I'm sure you missed her alot."

He nodded,  "Can I give you a kiss back?"

Jae lifted her brows and laughed.

"I can already see the JaeHopers losing their minds." She said. 

"Just a forehead kiss." He giggled. 

"Sure." She shrugged. 

Hoseok's long fingers splayed across her cheeks and his heart shaped lips pressed to her forehead. 

"I don't think I've ever done that to you. " he said. "You're usually the one giving affection to me."

"You hug me all the time,  Hobi." She said.

"Its different. " he said.  "It's gentle."

"I agree." she nodded. "A forehead kiss is affection in it's purest form." 

The next few minutes spent between Jae and Hoseok consisted of him making cute faces at her trying to get her to crack and her just smiling or laughing at him in fondness. 

Soon he was sent away to stare at Jungkook while Namjoon replaced him. 

"I'm not trying to take this awful punishment so you sit there and behave yourself." he informed her. 

Jae laughed, "Oh, damn.  You going all Daddy Joon on me?" 

He wrinkled his nose and looked away from her in digust. 

"Ha!" she laughed. 

"Aish! Jae!" He complained. 

"I literally didn't do anything!"  she laughed. 

"You can't just- " he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.  "You can not call me Daddy.  That's weird. You're like my sister." 

"Ok, A, I didn't like address you as Daddy.   I referred to you as 'Daddy Joon'.  That's Army's nickname, not mine.  I know you're a helpless clumsy little baby." she teased causing him to roll his eyes. 

"You deserve it if Jungkookie slays you." he remarked as he left the room to be paired with Seokjin.  

"Cheeky little twit!" she called after him. 

However, no less than three seconds later, the maknae was standing in the door with a look of determination in those big doe eyes. 

"Oh god." Jae laughed. 

Jungkook grinned wickedly, "I haven't lost yet, Noona." 

"This isn't a competition, Jungkook." Jae reminded him. 

"Everything is a competition." he shrugged. "Go!" 

"That's my job." the director said. 

Jae snorted. 

"Go.." the director said softly. 

Jungkook was staring at her, refusing to blink. 

"You know we can blink, right?" she asked. 

"I'm making it challenging." he said, elbows on his knees staring her down. 

Jae lifted a brow at him but kept his gaze. 

She settled back in her chair to get comfortable, her gaze softening more and more until she hadn't even realized that she was crying. 

It was only the look on Jungkook's face that alerted her. 

"Noona?" he whispered. "Are you ok?" 

"Yeah." she sniffled. "I'm fine. Why?" 

"You're crying." he said, brows furrowing. 

"What?" she said wiping her face to feel the wetness on her face. 

"What's wrong?" he asked concerned. 

"Nothing." she said sniffling again.  "I just, I guess I'm just really proud of you, Koo.  You've grown into such an amazing young man.  One second you're this young kid following me around everything and now you're just.. this amazing person.  I'm just so proud of you." 

Jae cracked, a sob breaking out of her and Jungkook, who couldn't stand to see her cry, followed after and immediately pulled her into a hug. 

Both of them losing for breaking eye contact before the bell sounded. 

"Ah, shit.  I caused you to lose, Kookie.  And hell I didn't even win." she chuckled trying to make light of the situation and pull away. 

However, he just pulled her back in, pushing her head onto his shoulder, "Don't worry about it.  I got you.  You know I do." 

She squeezed him in a tight hug, the both of them pulling away sniffling after some time. 

Soon after he was replaced with Taehyung who burst into the room and demanded that he complete this challenge with hair pats. 

And damn it if Jae didn't comply because he was just as spoiled rotten as the rest of them. 

In the end, Taehyung lost the challenge because Jae played with his hair and he fell asleep. 

Like always. 

She just let him, taking a moment to stare at his face and the way his lashes dusted his cheeks. 

She spoke quietly to the camera, "I'll take the punishment for this one.  I don't think he slept well last night." 

"He's the one that insisted though." the director laughed. 

Jae shrugged, "I'm his Noona. It's my job to look after him.  I'll take the punishment." 

"If you say so." 

Eventually, she gently woke the slumbering teddy bear and sent him on his way. 

There was only one left but she heard him before she saw him. 

Undoubtedly, laughing at Taehyung's sleepy face in the hallway. 

Park Jimin entered the room looking so beautiful that angels must've been jealous. 

Hell, Jae was jealous. 

But also, incredibly grateful that she could call him hers. 

Behind the camera, he winked at her causing the heat to crawl up her skin a little. 

The little shit was flirty even when he didn't mean to be. 

Though she had no doubts that he damn sure meant to be in that moment. 

"I'm sure you're just thrilled with his challenge." she remarked as he made his way over. 

"I'm not unhappy." he smirked as he scooted his chair close enough to hers that their knees touched. 

"Same rules apply." the director.  "However, the two of you are the last ones because Jae let Taehyung sleep a little longer earlier.  So the others are joining for this last one." 

"Oh great…" Jae rolled her eyes as the rest of the members filed in. "An audience." 

"Count down starting in 3, 2, 1." the director said. "Go." 

Jimin took Jae's hands in hers, bringing them up to his lips to kiss the knuckles. 

"Jimin…" she said, widening her at him. 

His gaze never wavered, "You know, all those years ago, the first time I saw you, I knew right then that you were the only one for me." 

"Jimin, what are you…?" she started, gesturing to the camera and everyone else. 

He simply kissed her knuckles again. 

"And I knew that at the time, I was too young.  I knew you had no interest in me at the time.  I knew that it would take time.  I had to watch you date, fall in love with people that weren't me.  I had to watch when you were heart broken.  And I did.  I'd do it all again. Because I know what I have.  I waited so long and finally, finally the stars aligned and the universe smiled on me because finally the woman of my dreams saw me not just as someone she loved but as a partner.   That's all I've ever wanted, sweetheart." 

Jae swallowed. 

She had no idea what he was doing. 

She was well aware that they were on camera and in front of people but in that moment, all of that faded away. 

She was lost in Jimin's eyes and surrounded by his voice. 

"Jae." he said, sliding down off the chair and onto his knee.  His fingers opening a box containing a ring. "Will you make me the happiest man alive and honor me by becoming my wife?" 

Jae's mouth fell open, tears spilled over her lashes and she completely fell apart. 

She felt his fingertips on her chin, lifting her face to his, "Baby?" 

Her eyes connected with his, the question hanging in the air between them. 

"Yes!" she struggled to get out. "Yes, yes, yes!" 

She was half crying, half laughing as he pulled her out of her chair and spun her around.  

The members all but stampeded over each other to get to the happy couple, cocooning them into a massive group hug of congratulations. 

And suddenly it dawn on Jae and she ripped herself from all of them, "How many of you fuckers knew about this?!" 

The reactions was a mixture of sheepish looks and coy smirks. 

She could've murdered them all in that moment and then she glanced at the camera. 

"Oh, shit.  Jimin, you do realize you've just outed us to the entire world, don't you?" she whined. 

Jimin smirked, pulling her down in a breathtaking kiss. 

When they parted he whispered, "Army will understand." 

And they did. 

Because to be completely honest, Army had been saying Jimin and Jae were getting married for years. 

There was a collective hashtag amongst Army. 

#jiminandjaefreakinfinally

.

HEllo my loves! I know this has taken FOREVER to post but the finale is finally here! I hope you enjoy it and look forward to updates to the other series as well as.....new projects! Kenny's Comeback is in full force!

Love,

K

@thickemadame

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#bts 8th member series untamed #untamed series #bts #bts 8th member #bts 8th member series #park jimin #park jimin x bts 8th member #jae x jimin #jimin x jae #park jimin fiction #park jimin fanfiction

[chimcess]

Waterlog || pjm (3)

Pairing: Jimin x Reader Other tags: Olympic Swimmer!Jimin, Ex Olympic Swimmer! Reader, Swim Coach!Reader Genre: Strangers to Friends to Lovers!AU, Coach!AU, Swimming!AU, HEAVY Angst, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, fluff, eventual smut, I'm so soft for these two it's crazy. Word Count: 12.2k+ Synopsis: After a car accident ends her athletic career, Y/N has slowly started rebuilding her life again as a high school swim coach. That’s until she gets a request from an old friend and finds herself back in the spotlight as the new coach of Olympic swimmer, Park Jimin. Warnings: toxic relationship (not reader and jimin), arguments, cheating (not reader and jimin), talks about previous child abuse, anxiety attack, strong language, crying, emotional abuse (not reader and jimin), talks of bad parental relationships, abandonment issues, some PTSD, prescription medication use, mentions of depression and mental health, lots of angst in this one, finally making some progress though, age insecurity, mutual pining, lots of side character development in this one, they really are so sweet together, jimin just being the nicest boy in the world, so much PDA, physical touch is his love language 👀👀👀, writing this is so comforting even when its angsty lol, i think that's it, let me know if I missed something A/N: Hello hello. Probably my favorite chapter to date. Bad news is that I think this series might be a little longer than originally intended. My inability to just get to the point has things moving a little slow, but I'm trying my best. We'll have to see, though! Hope you enjoy reading :)

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Time went by quickly. Wednesday and Friday morning, Jimin and I met up to train for a few hours and then got breakfast together. When he asked if I wanted to work out with him in the evenings, I agreed. In the beginning, I had given him pointers, but after the second week came to a close, we had started exercising in silence. We spotted one another, made small talk, and went to dinner on the nights he did not go home to be with his parents. We got along and I was happy my overwhelming attraction to him had slowly calmed down.

I was still aware of his presence, the way he smelled, and how often he smiled and laughed, but I had grown used to seeing him walking around in barely anything at all. Hoseok called me a cougar whenever we had time to chat while Andy kept telling me to talk with Jimin about how I felt, but I had gotten very good at deflecting. Things were better and I was taking my wins whenever I could get them. Even if those wins meant I went home sexually frustrated and aching for someone to make it better.

Jimin was packing up for the night and I was getting ready to head out. He had plans with a large group of his friends, so I would have to figure out dinner by myself this time. He invited me but I politely declined. I could vaguely recall how rude his friends from that restaurant had been, and that one girl's mean glare. I had no interest in repeating that.

Giselle waved at me on her way out which I returned with a smile. She was a very sweet, college girl and getting to know her was fun. Her brother moved out here six years ago and was the only reason she left Memphis. In-State tuition and a rent-free bedroom was all it took to convince her to spend some quality time with her big brother and his dog, Lucky.

She and Sam were the closest, but I would often see her eating lunch with Megan when he was with a client. Everyone was making bets on when they would eventually hook up, but I was convinced that had already happened and they were keeping it a secret from the nosy staff.

"See you tomorrow," Yoongi called out from across the room, seemingly appearing out of thin air.

He was out of eyesight before I could reply.

"Bye Yoon," Giselle sing-songed anyway, shoving her ear buds in and leaving before the door could close behind Yoongi. "Night guys!"

As the young woman said, Yoongi and Megan were the two most important people to befriend. Not just for massages either. The both of them were hilarious and kept the back fridge stocked with our favorite snacks. On the mornings I did not have time to eat breakfast, Megan stopped and got me a muffin and coffee from her favorite cafe. If I needed someone to help me out in the pool, Yoongi was always happy to offer himself for the job. It was challenging for me to focus on my swimming when Jimin was around, and I would often come in early to get a quick work out in before he got here.

“You okay getting home?” Jimin asked.

We had come together tonight, and he had offered to drive us in his truck. I had grown very fond of the green machine, which Jimin affectionately called Fiona, and I jumped at the chance to get in his passenger seat. We were usually riding around in my car since it was better on gas.

“Yeah, I’m riding with Sam.”

Sam and I had grown close as well. He was super funny and always down to hang out with me if I showed up by myself. On the odd Sunday I felt like getting out of the house, I found myself at the gym with Sam. I was currently attempting to teach him how to swim and always filled in for Yoongi on the weekends.

Jimin nodded, “Good. See you this weekend?”

I smiled, “Can’t miss your big party.”

Jimin’s 24th birthday was on the 13th and his family liked to go big. Eloise was clearing out an entire section in their restaurant for all of us, and I had found myself teamed up with Taehyung to help with the planning. Na-Yeon put everything in his hands since she was not feeling up to the task this year. I only agreed to help when I realized just how overboard the snowboarder would go if no one was there to reel him back in. So far, I had placed the responsibility of decorating, music, and organizing the gift table on my shoulders. James had pulled me aside and thanked me when he found out. Apparently, he was also worried about Taehyung’s enthusiasm. 

“It should be fun,” He nodded. “I’m going to head out.”

“See you tomorrow,” We had finally started coming 5 days a week. "We're working on your turns. Butterflies, too. Be prepared.”

He groaned, “You’re torturing me, coach.”

I laughed, “Is the baby upset?”

“Very,” He winked. My mouth went dry. Sometimes I felt silly for getting nervous around him, especially when I knew he flirted with everyone. I was not special. “See you Saturday.”

“Yeah,” I mumbled as I stared at his retreating back. “See you.”

Jimin’s birthday passed quietly. We had a great time and ate well. Taehyung got drunk enough to suggest karaoke once we cleared out the place for the night, and he and Na-yeon had all of us cracking up. I finally met Jungkook’s girlfriend, a pretty girl who did not talk very much, and I could feel the tension between the two of them. Jimin said that was just how they were and to ignore it.

After Jungkook successfully shoved Jimin's face into his cake, we opened presents. The boys got him tons of workout clothes and gear, Eloise bought him a new blender, and his parents both chipped in to get the new video game he had been talking about picking up.

I gifted him a bottle of his favorite cologne after Na-Yeon mentioned he was out. Jo Malone was the most distracting thing in my life right now, its scent clinging to the passenger side of my car most days and driving me insane if Jimin stood too close. Still, it was something I did not think I could part with now. Jimin was happy with the present and hugged me after opening it. I was positive I had this stupid grin on my face for the rest of the night.

By Halloween we were in the gym every day, save Sunday and the occasional Saturday when Jimin needed some time to rest. We both kept our word, our conversation at the restaurant we went to with Jungkook and Taehyung sticking better than I thought it would. Overtime he got more confident when asking for a break and I was a professional at picking up on his body language. We were a good team, and I was confident he would be in great shape for the Olympics.

It was mid-November now and Taehyung had finally gotten around to getting us together for the sushi date in Detroit. I had just gotten out of the shower when Jimin messaged he was going to come along. His mom had a rough Sunday and could not go to their usual dance class, so he had stayed with her instead. He looked worn out when he walked inside the pool room Monday morning so instead of training, I just sent him home. We were meeting back up on Wednesday to get back to work, but it seemed Jungkook’s nagging finally convinced him to come out with the rest of us.

My relationships with his friends had also started to improve. Taehyung had added me to their group chat a few weeks back and I had tried to keep up with them as often as I could remember to. It was not difficult. They text so often I had to silence notifications for the chat, but I had to admit they were really funny. Jungkook especially.

I was happy to spend time with everyone and getting out of the house sounded nice. Violet and Calvin were great, and I did enjoy eating dinner with them sometimes, but I would be lying if I said they would be my first choice to spend time with.

I had grown close enough with Taehyung during the partying planning that his bubbly, over the top personality had become more endearing than overwhelming. We had gone to lunch a few times together, his boldness only increasing with each meet up, and he could hold me hostage for hours if I let him. Milo was typically my saving grace, and Taehyung would leave with a wet kiss to my cheek and promises of the same time next week.

Tae: Y/N should pick you up

Jimin: Why???

Kookie: Your truck is ass

I chuckled and sent off a text of my own before going to my dresser to find something warm to wear. 

Me: I don’t mind driving

Me: Don’t hate on the truck. I like it.

My phone chimed a few times but I ignored it for now. I knew I wanted to wear a pair of dark, navy jeans. It was freezing outside so a long sleeve was a must, but I could get away with just two layers. My hands found a mustard-yellow turtleneck and I smiled. I could wear my brown boots with it. Happy with my outfit, I checked on the chat.

Jimin: U sure?

Tae: The truck is GREEN

Tae: Already a crime

Kookie: It can’t go over 60

Darcy: omg stop blowing my phone up 

Darcy: just ride with her dude

Jimin: Y/N?

I rolled my eyes. I hated when he did that. Jimin had the habit of double and triple checking in with someone. It was sweet but it also drove me insane. There was nothing more I disliked than repeating myself, especially if I already agreed to something. 

Me: I’ll pick you up in 30, k?

Jimin: Thanks

Darcy: Was that so hard?

I frowned. So, Darcy was in a bad mood then. Shouldn't take it out on Jimin, I thought. Even if she was having a bad day, something that seemed to be a reoccurring theme with her, it doesn't mean she can just talk to people like that. Fighting the urge to give into my annoyance and call her out, I tossed my phone on my bed and made myself finish getting ready.

Walking into the living room, I went on a hunt for the jacket I wanted to wear. It was the same color as my leather boots with sherpa trim. It would tie everything together and, I hoped, would keep Taehyung from complaining too much about the “offensive” color of my shirt. He had a hard time accepting anything in the yellow or green family. Finding it on the sofa, I nodded and left it be. I would grab it on my way out. 

It took me more time to get my hair figured out than anything, but once I gave up and did the same thing that I did every day, it worked itself. After that, I put on a little bit of makeup since I figured it would not take me very long. This was a casual outing with friends and the dim lights of the sushi place would give me some grace if things were not perfect. A nice base, simple eye look, and a layer of mascara already had me looking more awake than I had in months. After applying a layer of lip gloss and a misting of setting spray, I was out of the door, jacket keeping me warm, and purse tucked under my arm. 

I drove in silence, like I always did, and pulled onto the curb of Jimin’s house. Sending a text to the chat, I waited for him to come out. I was a few minutes later than I said I would be, but Jimin found a way to be late for everything, so I did not feel that bad about it. Taehyung and Milo were already on leaving Ann Arbor, and Jungkook and Darcy riding with them. They would only beat us there by fifteen minutes or so, but I hoped he would hurry up and come outside. Taehyung worked hard for those reservations.

My phone vibrated and I stared at the little device in my cup holder. It was weird how my anxiety fluctuated on a daily basis. Back home, I could talk on the phone and hold a conversation behind the wheel, but ever since I came to Michigan it felt like I had taken three massive steps back. Taking a few deep breaths, I told myself that I was safe. I was parked, completely stationary, and no one was around. No traffic meant no accidents. Sucking in a harsh breath, I picked it up.

Jimin: Be out in a sec

Jimin: Just making sure mom is okay

He had not left his mother’s house in days. I was worried about Na-Yeon, but I had to believe that Jimin would tell me if something was seriously wrong with her. I had truly started to feel connected with the woman. We joked over dinner and I found myself helping her out more and more each time I came by. It would devastate me if she passed away without me knowing how bad it had gotten. 

Me: Take your time

He came out only two minutes later. Wearing a heavy, black puffy jacket and tight pants, Jimin leisurely walked over and got into the car. His cologne hit me as soon as the door opened, and I bit my lip, trying to hide the deep inhale I took. Jo fucking Malone.

He smiled at me but otherwise kept quiet as I drove. He knew I had a difficult time behind the wheel and tried his best to keep conversation light. While I normally appreciated the sentiment, I did not want to make him sit in silence for 45 minutes. Opening and closing my mouth a few times, I struggled to come up with a good conversation topic.

We often bounced from idea to idea, mostly sticking to swimming and music, and I always found our little talks to be very insightful. Movies and tv shows had been fun to bond over, a small generational gap introducing us to shit we had never heard of before. There were so many things I could bring up, things that Jimin would jump at the idea to talk about. Still, I could not find my voice.

“So,” I started, awkwardly, trying to push past the blockade of anxiety. “Is this place as good as Tae says or is he going off on one of his rants again?”

Jimin chuckled softly. “It’s pretty good, but it’s still just sushi. Taehyung finds a way to make everything sound extravagant.”

We shared a quiet laugh. 

“It was nice of him to invite me,” My hands gripped the wheel tighter. We were starting to approach more populated areas. “He didn’t have to do that.”

Jimin snorted childishly, the sound relaxing me ever so slightly. If there was one thing I hated was driving at night. I was lucky the snow had stopped falling yesterday afternoon and the roads were clear, but a part of me wished I had asked Jimin to drive.

Traffic in Saline was lighter than any town back in Colorado, and driving around was a breeze in comparison. At home, you were lucky if there was only one accident a day, but more times than not I had been stuck on the interstate for hours because of multiple car crashes. Michigan felt less hectic; safer. Not safe enough to let my guard down, but safe enough to listen to Jimin when he spoke.

“Taehyung is just that kind of guy.”

I nodded; eyes glued to the road. I wanted to say something and keep our conversation flowing, but the more cars around us the more I tuned him out. My eyes flickered between my rearview mirror, side mirrors, and windshield rapidly as I drove. Once we were out of Saline and on I-94, I loosened my grip on the wheel. We would not hit much traffic until we were closer to Detroit.

Jimin stayed quiet and looked out the window. I wanted to thank him for being so understanding, but I knew he would not want me to. I kept my thoughts to myself and focused on the road. Jimin began to hum an unfamiliar tune.

My hands were shaking when we pulled up to the restaurant. Traffic had gotten pretty bad coming into the city, but we had picked a good day to come out. Jimin hummed and sang underneath his breath for most of the car ride, and we had a few small sporadic conversations when I felt the knots in my stomach loosen for a few brief moments.

"It's been forever since I've come here," Jimin said to himself, going to unbuckle his seat belt. "It looks pretty filled up."

Bash was a sushi place across from Wayne State University's football field and was one Taehyung’s favorite restaurants. He bragged about how delicious their food was for weeks before finally wearing me down with the promise of picking up the tab. He made reservations for their omakase, or “chef’s choice,” and promised I would get his obsession.

When I talked to Megan about it, she had said it was an expensive meal, so I was going to try and force myself to enjoy it regardless of my own personal feelings. Jimin seemed to like it here, and we usually enjoyed a lot of the same foods, so it made me feel a bit better about things.

I had to park down the street and spotted Taehyung’s Mazda a few cars away. Instead of getting out, I took a few moments to gather my composure. Jimin sat beside me patiently. He had grown used to my traffic anxiety. We had driven together so many times now, and he had gotten a taste of the worst of it a handful of times.

He had only asked about it the first time we rode to the gym together, completely frazzled and unsure of himself as I hyperventilated in the driver's seat. My hands trembled violently as my palms sweat profusely, and I let myself shed a few tears once we were parked. He reached out, placing a hand on my back, and quietly asked me what was bothering me.

“Red light,” I managed to wheeze out. They were doing some construction on the main road and things started piling up. I had gotten stuck in the intersection for just a few seconds, but it was long enough to send me into a blind panic. “Anxiety. Sorry. Need a minute.”

He helped me calm down, calming down to help me through my panic attack. We played a game of I-Spy, Jimin picking out the most obvious shit and saying the most random things to point out in order to make me laugh. When I felt a little better, he got out of the car to help me get out. After that he kept quiet about my obvious driving discomforts, but stuck close just in case I needed the support, and always offered to drive.

“Ready?” He asked when I grabbed my phone out of the cup holder.

“Yeah.”

We walked inside and the hostess made light conversation while she walked us to the back. Taehyung's laugh could be heard from the other side of the room, and his bright blue hair and vibrant eyeshadow stuck out like a sore thumb in this place. Milo was dressed in all black, his arm draped around his fiancé's shoulder, and a smile on his face. Jungkook was beside him scrolling through his phone, but Darcy was nowhere in sight. Glancing at Jimin, he seemed exasperated.

“Trouble in paradise,” He murmured, leaning down so I could hear him. I had to imagine their relationship was very exhausting and took its toll on their friend group. I knew how much it sucked being caught between Tilly and Hobi back in the day. “Here we fucking go.”

Taehyung jumped out of the booth when he caught sight of us, his fluffy, white cropped top riding up, revealing even more of his tanned skin. The snowboarder wrapped his arms around my waist and snuggled my hairline, showering me in compliments. Gold hoop earrings tapped my forehead, and his belly button ring was cold against my ribcage. He was happy to see me “dolled up” for once and forgave how ugly my shirt was since I looked “so cute.”

Milo gave me a slight wave, eyes never leaving Taehyung's bouncing body as he embraced Jimin, and Jungkook put his phone down to greet us. Darcy had gone to the bathroom and from the look on Milo’s face, Jimin’s was right about trouble in paradise. Whatever was going on, we were all about to fall witness. It made my stomach churn just thinking about it.

Our waitress brought a new pot of tea, asking us if we needed anything, before leaving with the promise of the first course coming out soon. Darcy almost slammed into the poor woman on her way back to our booth, her annoyed huff making the hair on the back of my neck stand up. When she sat down beside her boyfriend her entire body was rigged and face pulled together tightly. She did not spare us a glance as she sulked.

Darcy was a very beautiful girl and it made sense why Jungkook liked her so much. Tanned skin, green eyes, and black hair, the girl had one of those bodies most women would pay thousands of dollars for. Like Taehyung had said, she was a pleasant enough person, and we did not along well enough to hold a conversation, but there was no hiding the fact that Darcy was not a nice girl. In fact, I would venture to say she was very, very mean.

I saw it firsthand at Jimin’s birthday party. I had a moment where I felt myself panicking. Overwhelmed with all of the noise and people, I excused myself and called Andy to get my head back on straight. The women's restroom was tucked away in a small hallway and allowed me the space to shed a few tears. I was just starting to calm down, Andy's words of encouragement getting back to some sort of baseline, while I rubbed cold water on my neck. That was when I heard Jungkook on the other side of the door.

He was angry and when I told Andy I needed to go, I had every intention of going out there to talk to him, but another voice beat me to it. Darcy had been in a bad mood since she walked through the front door, her shitty attitude bringing down the party every time she opened her mouth. At first, I just brushed it off as an off night, something I could feel empathy towards, but then she opened her mouth and stopped those thoughts in their tracks.

The two of them were serial cheaters, and Jimin had alluded to that being their main issue when I asked about her attitude problem earlier that night. Eloise was the person who gave me the whole story and was not afraid to voice her dislike for the older girl. This was different from Milo, a guy who she clashed with due to their night and day personalities. Darcy had actively picked on and made fun of her growing up, and bullied her older sister while they were in school together.

Darcy, according to Eloise, started the back-and-forth cheating when they were in college. Instead of going their separate ways, something I doubt anyone would have blamed Jungkook for doing, he chose to get even. After fucking one of her sorority sisters, Jungkook made his way through the entire house within the span of three months. In retaliation, Darcy slept with a couple of guys from the NHL, something she still did to this day.

On the night of the party, she was still fuming over catching him with another woman a few days prior. Trapped in the bathroom and too afraid to let them know I could hear them; I suffered through five minutes of a couple’s quarrel I had no business being in the middle of. It was an eye opener for sure and made me avoid getting too close to either of them.

Darcy was very mean and spiteful, her words meant to cut him deeply with little care about how it would make him feel in the long run. She even brought up screwing one of his rivals to get back at him, something she had done on numerous occasions, and went as far as to compare the two men in bed. It helped to explain why Jungkook hated Jackson Wang so much.

Jungkook, despite how much I enjoyed him as an individual, was just as awful. He spent most of the argument defending his bad behavior by bringing up her own and took no accountability for his actions. He could have sex with all of Michigan and it would be justified because she cheated on him first. It was all very juvenile, and I tried my best to avoid them for the rest of the night.

“Bet they can’t go ten minutes without fighting,” Jimin mumbled in my ear.

I fought back a smile, leaning into his side. Physical touch was the swimmer’s love language and I had slowly grown accustomed to small touches here and there. So, it did not catch me off guard when his arm came around my shoulders, resting just above my head, hand gently brushing against my neck. The voice in my head often wished he would do it more often.

“She won’t start something before the food gets here,” I reasoned, stealing a look at the couple. Jungkook seemed fine, but from the look on Darcy’s face that might change soon. “I’ll say twenty.”

“What are we bargaining for?”

I laughed awkwardly, “Whatever you want.”

Taking a second to think, Jimin eyed the couple across the table. Taehyung and Milo were obviously extremely aware of the couple's awkward tension and tactfully ignored them, instead giggling about some inside joke. They were a very sweet pair. My weariness about Milo had dissipated over the last few weeks, but I could understand why he and Eloise could not get along.

Lou herself had admitted to being a bit of a stuck-up teenager back in the day, and Milo was the typical small-town stoner. They constantly butt heads when they were in high school, and just drifted apart with age. Taehyung and Jimin's friendship were the only reason they were in the same circle anymore, and the two just never spoke to avoid pressing buttons.

“I want to do something together,” Jimin finally said, I smiled, trying to ignore the snarky comments Darcy was making. The arguing was starting, and I felt my neck growing hot. Did they have to do this in public? “Get dinner or something.”

“We do that all the time,” I countered, half-heartedly paying attention to him.

“Denny’s doesn’t count," He mumbled.

The waitress finally came back with a large tray of sushi in her hand. That seemed to break up the argument momentarily, but Darcy did not seem pleased to be interrupted. Stuffing a large piece of ahi sashimi in my mouth, I sparked up a conversation with Taehyung to keep myself from having another meltdown. Beside him, Milo sent me a grateful look.

The rest of the table was silent, waiting for the fight to resume. Taehyung kept smiling painfully, but I could see the panic bubbling in his eyes, and for once I saw a small crack in his otherwise well-crafted facade. 

“I didn’t mean just getting food,” Jimin finally continued when we hit a lull, and it took me a few seconds to remember what he was talking about. “I meant… going out.”

I looked at him, eyebrow raised. His cheeks were puffed with scallops and I wished we were alone. This was not a conversation I wanted to have in front of the others, especially if he was insinuating what I thought he was. I did not want to jump to conclusions, but I was sure he was asking me out on a date. Even if it made me feel jittery thinking about it, I had a difficult time finding the voice to say yes. Saying no felt just as impossible, though, and I wished he would have picked a better time to bring this up. Whatever the hell this was.

“What are you asking me?” I whispered, taking another piece of fish off my plate, sneaking a look at Taehyung and Milo.

They were too wrapped up in one another to being listening in on us. I did not even bother checking in with the other two. I knew for a fact they did not care about anybody else but themselves.

“You know,” He replied.

Dating was not off the table, and I was more than happy to indulge myself, but I was worried about crossing this invisible line I had drawn. What would people say if they found out? A coach and her trainee, and even worse, the older woman and her much younger man. I could see the headlines now and it made my palms sticky. That would not be a good look for either one of us, and I did not want our personal relationship to affect Jimin’s career.

Putting my chopsticks down, I leaned away from him. “Can we talk about this later?”

He nodded, meeting my eyes, and I was relieved to see he was not upset. I had seen him angry a few times now, and he wore it on his sleeve with pride. Jimin was not afraid of his emotions, something I found extremely attractive, and it was nice that all I could see right now was understanding. Whatever happened he would hear me out, and I had to hope he would be understanding. I just had to be sure I did not fuck anything up.

Across the table the bickering had started again. Our waitress brought out the rest of our meal, sans desert, and seemed happy we were enjoying the food. She eyed Darcy wearily and left our table in a hurry. I felt horrible for the wait staff who had come to our table. They were all getting the nastiest looks from the dark haired beauty.

“Do we really have to do this now?” Jungkook sighed, running a hand through his hair roughly. His face was red and expression tight. “In front of my friends, dude? Are you serious?”

I cleared my throat, grabbed my tea and took a long sip before sinking into the booth and praying no one could see me. Jimin’s arm dropped, and he squeezed my shoulder in comfort. I let myself melt under his touch. It always felt nice when his hands were on me, his warmth burning hot like a furnace even in below freezing temperatures. Taehyung’s eyes were bulging out of his head now, his bottom lip trembling as he tried his best to keep the conversation between the four of us light. He had stopped trying to include the other two.

“You two seem close,” He gritted, fakeness coming from him that I had never encountered before. “Glad you were able to sort that out.”

I looked over at Jimin and saw his cheeks had gone pink. So, Taehyung knew something I didn’t. It would make sense for the childhood best friend to get the scoop before the chick he’s known for two months, I had definitely vented to my friends on more than one occasion, and my curiosity was peaked.

“I'm working on it,” Jimin replied, taking a big gulp of water. “Thanks, Tae," He breathed, rolling his eyes.

I stifled a laugh. He was so cute when he was embarrassed. I made a mental note to ask Tae to explain what he meant when we had a chance to get lunch. I had a feeling the snowboarder would be more than happy to divulge that little piece of information. 

“Talking about me to your friends?” I teased, trying my best to ignore the ever-growing argument across from me. The butterflies in my stomach were a helpful distraction. “Good things, I hope.”

He cracked a smile, face and neck flushed. “The best things.”

Such a flirt.

I bit my lip and looked away. Eating was a nice way to interrupt the electricity that was enveloping us, and I gorged myself on octopus and tuna. Whatever the hell these dishes were, I had to admit the sushi here was the best I had ever had. I would never doubt a recommendation from Taehyung again.

The conversation started flowing easily after that. Jungkook and Darcy were at a stalemate and were relatively quiet on their side of the booth. With the atmosphere lightening, Milo felt good enough to start telling us his latest work stories. He was a firefighter along with all three of his brothers. His father was promoted to chief about five years ago but was coming up to his retirement. The only one of his siblings to avoid the fireman fate was his baby sister, but had still managed to find a job at the station.

"You guys must be close," I laughed in disbelief.

“It’s the family business,” He joked. "Rosie is our new EMT."

Taehyung spoke excitedly about his upcoming competitions and was really hopeful he would win enough to qualify for the Olympics this year. Milo and Jimin both reassured him multiple times while I tried my best to keep up with everything he was talking about. I had very little knowledge of snowboarding, so I was having to constantly interrupt and ask for clarification. No one seemed to mind, and eventually Jungkook joined in to talk about his upcoming hockey games.

The Red Wings were having a good year, and he was proud of his team for working as hard as they did. As a goalie, he did not do a lot of skating, but his job was one of the hardest on the team. From what I knew after watching a few games on tv with Jimin's family, Jungkook was one of the best goalies in the NHL who was highly sought after. He had been offered millions to transfer to the New York Rangers, but out of loyalty he turned them down.

“I’ll take you to a few matches if you want,” Jimin offered. “Kook can get us tickets whenever.”

I smiled, “That sounds like fun.”

“Milo and I go all of the time so we can sit together,” Taehyung interjected, his shoulders relaxed for the first time since we got here.

Darcy was quiet and stayed on her phone. Jungkook was pretending she was not here, and it helped keep the arguing from starting again. I was not sure how long the truce would last, but I hoped they could hold it together long enough for us to finish eating.

“So Y/N,” Milo mused, taking a piece of fish from Taehyung’s plate. “Have you ever thought about competing again?”

I laughed nervously, “For a time, maybe. My injuries make it hard for me to swim the way I used to so I decided to keep it as a hobby.”

It was not a complete lie, but I knew I might be able to get back into competitions if I put in the time and effort. I hated the thought of being back in the spotlight, cameras shoved in my face, only to lose and give them more to talk about. I was still recovering from the trauma they inflicted on me after the accident. My leg injuries just gave me the perfect excuse to keep my distance.

He nodded, eyebrows knitted, “I didn’t know you had medical leave. What happened?”

Jimin tensed up beside me. 

“I was in a car accident,” I replied. Talking about what happened did not bother me as much as it used to, and Milo seemed genuinely interested in the answer. “I had to get a full knee replacement on my left side, and a full hip replacement. I should have lost my leg, but the doctor on staff recognized me and brought up my profession.”

Milo whistled, giving me a sympathetic look. “Leg? You could have died.”

“Well,” I breathed, finishing off my last piece of fish. “I pulled through though, so it wasn’t all bad.” I fiddled with my shirt, pretending to smooth it down as I played it cool. "Anyway, I have nerve damage in my leg that makes me get really horrible cramps and twitching if I overwork my muscles. It sucks but coaching is really fun, so I can't complain."

Blatantly lying wasn't something I did often, but I truly hated reliving the months of physical therapy. Unable to walk or talk, I was stuck in that hospital bed for weeks and then got sent home to watch my closest friends wait on me hand-and-foot. When I wasn’t in physical therapy, I was with my SLP. When I wasn’t with her then I was in bed, crying into my pillow, and wishing I had never woken up. It was an extremely dark time in my life, one filled with chronic pain and overwhelming depression, and talking about it made me emotional. 

“Anyway,” Taehyung sent his fiancé a pointed look. “Kookie’s next home game is in two weeks.”

Happy to be out of the spotlight, I began to talk with Jimin about changing our schedule around so we could attend the game. Taehyung was excited to get me some Red Wing merchandise, and Jungkook quickly began to boast about his prowess on the ice. Darcy scoffed beside him and I felt the group tense up.

“You’re so cocky, Ian,” She taunted, eyes glued to her phone. “I heard Avalanche was doing really well this season.”

I knew from the group chat that the Red Wings and the Colorado Avalanche had a long-standing rivalry. It had started all the way back in the mid-90’s and reached its peak in 2002. While the intensity had dissipated over the years, it had recently spiked up again due to Jungkook and Jackson Wang’s ongoing feud. The only reason Darcy would bring that up would be to piss her boyfriend off. 

“Hm,” Jungkook smirked, chuckling darkly. “Who told you that?”

I held my breath, already guessing where this was going. The tension from earlier was thicker than ever as we fell silent. Darcy put her phone on the table, flipped her hair over her shoulder, and looked Jungkook in the face as she replied.

“Jackson.”

It was dead silent for a few seconds. Then, without waiting for a response, Darcy kept digging the knife in and twisting. She called him ugly, said he sucked in bed, brought up all of the ways Jackson was better than he was, and went as far as to bring up his father's affair. Jungkook could not get a word in as her silky voice dropped lower and lower, words cutting deeper and deeper, and eyes growing brighter as she watched his expression fall. I learned something tonight. Darcy enjoyed hurting Jungkook.

"Why are you doing this, dude?" Jungkook's voice was thick with emotion. "You're acting like a fucking child. It's embarrassing."

“Holy shit,” Milo groaned as their voices got louder. “Are they being forreal right now?”

“Babe,” Taehyung scolded, the forced smile still plastered on his face. “Language.”

“You weren’t embarrassed when you fucked that girl” Darcy screamed and I felt my stomach twist uncomfortably. “Why should I feel bad about airing out my dirty laundry? Everyone here knows how much of a whore I am anyway, isn’t that right, Ian?”

“Keep your voice down,” Jungkook hissed, eyes glassy. “You’re causing a scene.”

Taehyung and Milo looked as mortified as I felt, both of them staring at Darcy in horror. The entire restaurant had gone silent. Eyes were glued to our table as they argued. She shouted about him getting his dick sucked in their bed, and Jungkook was just angry she was acting like this in public. It was Jimin’s birthday all over again only this time they knew people were watching and did not care. Taehyung’s smile was finally gone and replaced by trembling lips and fidgeting hands.

“Take that shit outside,” Jimin cut in, voice cold and hard. Darcy glared daggers in our direction. “You’re going to get us kicked out.”

Darcy opened her mouth to argue but was interrupted by the waitress coming back and demanding our party leave. Taehyung began to apologize profusely while Darcy stormed out of the restaurant, bumping into numerous people roughly without looking back. Jungkook was hot on her heels, breathing heavily, and eyes glossed over with unshed tears. She shouted that Jackson was outside and for Jungkook to go fuck himself. Jungkook didn’t reply but I knew he was not expecting the other man to be here. I sure the fuck wasn't.

An arm wrapped around my shoulders, “Hey, calm down. Breathe.”

I had not realized I had been holding my breath. Turning my head, I was taken aback by how close Jimin was. Our noses brushed together, his breath hot against my cheek, and I jerked away, heart racing. The butterflies were swarming now, and a shiver went down my spine. His arm dropped and I immediately missed its warmth. Flustered, I scooted out of the booth and kept my head hung low. I was so embarrassed, and I could hear Taehyung’s voice starting to wobble as he handed over some cash to the waitress for the trouble. No one was going home happy tonight. 

“I’m so fucking pissed off,” Jimin grunted, keeping in step with me. Milo was attempting to get a now hysterical Taehyung calmed as they followed behind us. “I don’t know why Tae invites the two of them anywhere.”

I shook my head, “It’s not his fault. She needs to get some self-control, though. That was so rude and uncalled for, and for what?"

“They both owe him a fucking apology,” He sighed harshly.

The guests of honor were already in a very heated screaming match when we finally made it outside. Whatever had been brewing inside had clearly reached its peak, and neither one of them was willing to back down. Jimin’s arm was back around my shoulders as he tried his best to shelter me from the strong winds that were kicking up. Looking at Darcy and Jungkook all I could see were my parents and it caused me great discomfort. Maybe I should try to call my dad again and make sure he was alright? He rarely answered but at least it would cut some of the edge off of my anxiety.

“Why are you acting like this?” Jungkook shouted, pulling at his hair. “What the fuck is wrong with you, dude?”

“You!” Darcy shrieked. “You! You! YOU! You’re the problem. This is all your fault!”

Jungkook called her a crazy bitch and Darcy slapped him across the face before stomping off. A sleek red convertible was waiting for her on the curb, a well-groomed man behind the steering wheel. He smiled and waved at Jungkook before speeding off, Darcy already attaching her lips to his neck and not sparing any of us a second glance.

“What the fuck!” Taehyung shouted, sobbing and clinging to Milo. 

I was surprised he was able to hold himself back for that long. He seemed hellbent on strangling Jungkook as soon as he was able. I stepped to the side watching a man I had never seen upset shove Jungkook backwards. Any resemblance of a smile was gone now, replaced with a snot-nosed, red eyed man with bared teeth. Jungkook stumbled, barely keeping his footing before shoving the other man back. Milo was quick to defend his fiancé, pushing Jungkook so hard he stumbled, fell on his ass, and cried out in pain. 

Jimin’s arm gripped me tighter as he stared at the scene unfold in silence. His clenched jaw, however, told me how angry he was. I briefly wondered what he would be doing if he was not so focused on keeping me warm.

“That was so fucked up,” Taehyung cried, wiping his face roughly. “I told you both to keep that shit at home or don’t come!”

“She started it! It’s not my fault-”

“Dude,” Milo shook his head, wrapping his arms around Taehyung. “It doesn’t fucking matter. That’s your girl.”

As the three of them argued, I tried to decipher the look on Jimin’s face. He was angry, that was very apparent, and I felt my own anger finally start to rise. He had been dealing with so much shit and on his first night out in ages this happens? It was unfair and ridiculous, my frustration over the entire situation making me want to go over and push Jungkook around, too. However, I knew that was not the way to handle this. Truth was, he was not the only person to blame for how badly the night had ended. Darcy was the main instigator.

“Are you okay?” I asked Jimin, stepping away from his tight embrace. His arm was still around my shoulders with no sign of moving. “I’m sorry everything got so shitty.”

He nodded, face softening when he looked at me. “Just worried about Taehyung. He was really excited about tonight.”

The yelling was finally starting to calm down and I was happy that they were talking things out. I did not think I could handle the screaming for any longer. I had been a bundle of nerves since I left my house, and my fingers trembled at my sides. I could hear my mother’s voice echoing in my head, though I was positive it was distorted after so many years. Sometimes when her and dad fought, she would find me hiding in my closet and pull me out, hands leaving my skin tender from the harsh grip she had on my arms, before telling me to clean up the broken dishes from off the floor.

“Come here you little shit!”

She hated me; hated being a mother. I could remember how much I wished she would hold me like the other kids' moms held them but was too afraid to ask. One time I drew a picture of her at school and she never even looked at it. Instead, she smoked her cigarettes at the dinner table and watched Law and Order. If I really thought about it, she threw the drawing away. It was too dirty. Just like I was too dirty.

Mom had germaphobia and considered me one of the dirtiest things she had ever seen. I was not allowed in their bedroom because of it. Dad went along with it like he did everything else. When he wasn’t drinking, he was sleeping or in the garage. I hoped he was doing okay. Danielle seemed to be just as controlling as mom had been.

“Where’d you go?”

I startled, whipping around to find Jimin staring at me. His expression was gentle and calm, and I was suddenly aware of the harsh chill nipping at my wet cheeks. I had not noticed I was starting to cry. Strange. It had been a long time since those memories had been brought up.

“Are you okay?” He asked, rubbing my arm. “You looked lost.”

I nodded, quickly reaching up to pat the tears away. It was a good thing my mascara was smudge proof or else I might look even more pathetic. I am 31 now and it felt stupid to cry over things so far in the past. Things I had not had to deal with in well over 20 years. Dr.Wolfe would disagree with me, but she wasn't here.

“Yeah,” I nodded, voice thick. “Just zoned out for a second. Eyes must have dried out.”

It was a bad lie, but a lie he accepted. Squeezing my arm one last time, he finally moved away to give me a bit of breathing room. That was another thing that I always appreciated about the guy. He never overstayed his welcome, even if he wanted to. Taking a second to compose myself, I mindlessly fixed my hair and adjusted my clothes. Nervous habit.

“I think everyone’s heading home for the night,” Jimin said, nodding his head toward the other three men. “They seem cool. You ready to leave?”

I shrugged, “If you are.”

He nodded and walked over to the ground. I gave myself another moment to gather my thoughts. The worst of it was over and I doubted those memories would make themselves known again. With the screaming over it would not take long for my head to get itself straightened out. I might ask Jimin to drive us back, though. I was exhausted, and frankly, I did not think we would be safe if I was behind the wheel. Nothing worse than an anxious driver.

Jungkook was ashamed of their behavior tonight, and when I joined the others, he was quick to throw a million apologies in my direction. I accepted them all easily but knew it would take me a few days to fully forgive him. Tonight was a lot. Hopefully I could speak with Taehyung privately and ask him not to invite the couple out with us. If I never had to see Darcy again it would make my stay that much easier.

“I think we’re going to go home,” Milo said once Jungkook walked away. He was planning on calling an Uber so Tae could have a bit of space. “My little flower is burned out for the night.”

I smiled sadly, “Are you sure? We can always try something else.”

Taehyung’s head snapped in my direction and I wanted to scoop him up in my arms. His face was puffy from crying and eyes still misty. He was quick to nod his head and reached out to take hold of my hands.

“You still want to hang out with me?” He whimpered.

I had only said it to cheer him up not thinking that he would actually go for the idea. I had never seen him so distraught before and Milo seemed convinced that he was over having fun. Stealing a look at the blonde, he gave me a grateful smile but otherwise kept a watchful eye on Taehyung.

“Of course I do,” I finally replied, squeezing his large hands. “Tonight wasn’t your fault.”

His lower lip started to wobble again and next thing I knew I was in a very tight, warm hug. Taehyung cried into the crook of my neck. He was worried I would not like him anymore because of the fight. I awkwardly hugged him back, hoping my calm reassurances would soothe him. We really needed to get from outside the front of this restaurant before they called the cops. 

“It’s alright,” I said, trying to gently remove his arms from my waist. “We’re still friends, I promise.”

After another minute of crying, Taehyung was back in Milo’s arms. His face was red, and his nose was running, but the sobs had stopped. Jimin placed a hand on my lower back and started to bounce a few ideas off of Milo. It was late, but from the sound of things, our get together was not over. I could not say for certain if this was a good thing or not, I did need to have that talk with Jimin. If we were out too late there was no way for me to promise I would not pass out in the car.

“Uh,” Jimin thought for a second. “If we’re still hungry there’s Pie Sci and Woodbridge is right down the street. There's also that park a few blocks away."

I shrugged, “Whatever’s the best?” Looking at Taehyung, I made sure that he was feeling well enough to hang out. “I won’t be upset if you want to go home. It was a rough night for all of us.”

He sniffled and nodded. “I’m just really tired.”

Jimin and I said our goodbyes and I promised the blue haired boy I would call him in the morning to set up another meet up. He called it a group date, something neither Jimin nor I disagreed with, but it did make me feel queasy. Depending on how our conversation goes, we may never spend time together outside of training. I felt like I was going to vomit.

“Let me drive?” Jimin murmured as we parted ways with the couple. 

I nodded, digging in my purse to find them. “Mind reader, I swear. Get out of my head, kid.”

He snickered, “Who says you weren’t in mine, granny”

The queasiness dissipated and I felt like I could breathe a little bit easier now. Being alone with Jimin had never felt this nerve wracking before, not even the first time we met, and it was hard to explain all of the thoughts and feelings going through my head. We were finally having the talk, but I had never imagined it going this way. Handing him the keys, I elbowed him in the ribs.

“Whoops,” I mocked. “You know me and my bad eyesight, kiddo.”

“Watch it,” He hissed, rubbing the spot. “Don’t want you breaking anything. You know you have frail bones.”

I laughed, “Don’t make me give you a knuckle sandwich, punk.”

Sliding into the passenger seat felt less daunting after the light hearted exchange. Still, my blood was pumping as Jimin clicked his seatbelt in place. I had no idea when the conversation would shift into murkier waters, but I needed to start thinking about what to say to him. 

Denying my feelings would only make things worse, and I did not think the younger man would believe me. In fact, he would be offended that I thought he was dumb enough to get bamboozled in the first place. Lying did not seem like the right call anyway. My feelings were not something to feel ashamed about, but they were very frightening. 

“When is later?”

I gasped, startled out of my thoughts. We had been driving for over ten minutes already. Time seemed to slip by when I was lost in my own head. Jimin apologized for scaring me but repeated the question once I reassured him that I was fine.

“Now,” I mumbled. “I guess later is now.”

Turning on the blinker, Jimin switched lanes smoothly. He was probably the best driver that I knew and always made sure to keep my little quirks in mind during our rides. He had even gotten used to leaving the radio off when I was around, something that I appreciated more than words could ever say. Recognizing that I was stalling, I cleared my throat and tried my best to get my jumbled thoughts across.

“As much as I would like to go on that date,” I started, voice weak, “I’m just a bit concerned with how that might affect our ability to work together.”

There we go, I thought to myself mentally patting myself on the back. That was not as hard as I thought it would be. Leaving out a few details would not hurt anybody, and it was the main cause of concern for me. My age was definitely up there, but I doubted Jimin would understand my perspective. To him I was just older, but to the rest of the world I was this cougar on the prowl for young men to help me relive my glory days. Even my own friends thought it was funny to make fun of the age gap.

“Is it only because of that?” Jimin pressed, his voice telling me that he was still reacting positively to whatever was coming out of my mouth. I was refusing to look at him, fearful that he would see through me. “Or is there something else bothering you?”

“W-w-well-” I stammered, “There is the media frenzy to think about. Sejin is already dealing with the press and your ‘out of character’ seclusion this season. Then there’s the age gap. I just-” I struggled to find the right words. Having let my insecurity slip out, I lost my flow and scrambled to get back on track. “Look, I haven’t done this whole dating thing in a really long time, and I don’t want that to get in the way of being a good coach. Ozzie put me in charge of you, and my reputation is on the line.”

I could hear my heart beating in my ears. Mouth dry and palms sweaty, I forced myself to look out of the window as I spoke. Anxiety had been something I dealt with for as long as I could remember, and it only got worse the older I got. My hands and fingers trembled in my lap as I tried to steady my breathing. 

In all of the dreams I had about Jimin, and there had been quite a few at this point, this moment had never felt so real and raw. We were always in these picture perfect pieces of heaven, sunshine beaming down on us, and the words I desperately wanted to say fell from my lips with ease. It was simple and sweet, and yet profound and beautiful. I could wax poetics and put myself thoughts together so eloquently he had no choice but to say yes to me. 

Reality was different. Here I was stumbling over my sentences and stuttering my way through words. Instead of taking his hand with mine, I was fidgeting with shaking fingers and desperately hoping he could not see just how uncomfortable I was. I knew he did. He always noticed. My heart was racing so fast I was afraid it would burst. Had he turned the heart up? It was boiling.

“I just want to know how you feel about me.”

“Hm?” I squeaked, unable to form any real words. My mouth was too dry. 

“I’ve thought about all of the same shit,” Jimin continued, voice as smooth and calming as ever. “I don’t care about any of that. All I want to know is how you feel about me.”

“You know,” I replied, wheezing. Talking felt impossible. “You know.”

“I want to hear you say it.”

Taking in a deep breath, I squeezed my eyes shut and began the mental countdown. My therapist taught me the technique years ago and I always found it to be helpful. I did this a few times until I felt calm enough to open my eyes. 

“Are you alright?” Jimin asked.

“Yeah,” I nodded, finally feeling my heart rate slowing. “A little anxious.”

“Don’t be,” He placed a hand on my knee. “It’s just me.”

And he was right. It was just Jimin and I in my car, but that was also the reason I felt so suffocated. There was nowhere to run or hide in here, and if things went south I was stuck with him for half an hour. Trying not to let those pessimistic thoughts send me back into a panic, I began to mentally point out things in my car.

Air freshener. It's green. It smells like pine and lemons. I want a new scent. Jimin likes to buy this coconut and mango one that smells like candy. I will buy one like his. I love the smell.

I let out a heavy breath. Everything was fine. He was not upset. He just wanted to know how I felt about him. Nothing more nothing less. My heart was settling, and my fingers were no longer shaking.

“I like you,” I choked out, placing my hand over his. “But you already knew that.”

He gently laughed, flipping his hand up to intertwine our fingers. 

“Yeah, you’re a terrible actress.”

I groaned, leaning my head against the window. As much as I tried kidding myself, there was absolutely no way he did not see the way I looked at him. I always knew when his flirting took on a more serious edge, like when he called me beautiful after seeing the scar on my leg for the first time, so it should not have been surprising that he picked up on a thing or two. Still, it did not make it any less embarrassing.

“How long have you known?” I asked, peeking at him through my lashes.

“I mean, I had a feeling when you first got to town, but I wasn’t completely sure until that first training day.”

He laughed at my embarrassed groan, holding my hand tighter. I knew I wasn't subtle enough. Poker face champion, my ass.

“Don’t be embarrassed,” He cooed. “You’ve been my dream girl since I was, like, 15.”

“That's not helping the age gap thing,” I tittered as I played with his fingers. Then, because I could not help myself. “Dream girl, huh?”

Picking up on the teasing tone in my voice, Jimin chortled. 

“Okay, big head. Calm down.”

“Big head?” I guffawed, pulling my hand out of his grasp. “Who are you calling big head, shortstop?”

“You, big head,” Taking back my hand, Jimin pinned it down and kept a tight grip. “No take backs.”

I always loved it when Jimin was in a good mood. He was so playful and full of energy, and all signs of those dark days were in the deepest parts of his mind. It was impossible to keep myself from playing along which only served to egg him on.

“You never said yes or no.”

“Yes or no to what?” I questioned. 

Jimin started rubbing the back of my hand with his thumb.

“To that date.”

Saying yes felt wrong, but saying no felt impossible. No matter what I said someone would be upset, and I had to decide who that would be: Jimin or America? I turned my own hand around this time and put my fingers through his. They fit together awkwardly, his hands just a bit too large, but I still found it perfect all the same.

“Do you have any ideas?”

His shiteating grin was contagious and a burst of butterflies began to flutter in my stomach. Hands clasped, Jimin started to list off all of the places we could go, but I was not fully listening. I had a date with this guy. I was going on a date with my trainee. 

“What do you think?”

I blinked rapidly, hoping he could not tell that I had zoned out. 

“You pick,” I breathed. “Surprise me.”

The rest of the drive back home was spent making small talk and discussing food preferences. Jimin was a dinner and a movie kind of guy, while I would rather do some sort of activity. What type of conversation could we have in a theater? Jimin seemed excited to plan out a fun night and I was just happy he was this into me. The feeling was most definitely mutual.

“Do you mind if I go to my house tonight? Mom needs some space and I know my dad is tired of having me breathing down their necks.”

I had yet to go over to his house. The days that we drove together were when he spent the evening with his parents. When Na-yeon and I talked about it, she was more upfront about her health situation than the men of the house. James spent most of his time taking care of his wife and their son enjoyed giving him a break every now and then. James would go on a fishing trip with his friends while Jimin stayed back to keep an eye on his mother. 

“Is it closer to town?” I asked, nibbling on my lower lip. 

I had yet to drive through downtown Ann Arbor. The Park house, and by proxy the Anderson’s, was a thirty minute drive from the bustling city. Nestled in the smaller town of Saline going towards Manchester, I had rarely had to leave the small town. This trip to Detroit was the farthest I had gone since arriving in Michigan, but I had a feeling the traffic in downtown Ann Arbor would be a bit much for me to drive through alone.

“Yeah,” I felt even more nervous by his nonchalant tone. “I used to live downtown, but I got tired of the noise. I bought my house in Eberwhite last summer, so there’s a little less foot traffic.”

“How’s the drive back to Saline?” Even I could hear the hesitation in my voice.

“Less than twenty,” Rubbing the back of my hand, his voice took on a sweeter tone. “We don’t have to. My truck’s at my parent’s place anyway.”

“Maybe some other time?” I forced myself to laugh, hoping to make the awkward tension leave. “Preferably when it’s not dark outside.”

I relaxed into my seat once I started seeing familiar landmarks. Saline was a very small town with a little over 2,000 residents, but downtown still had a way of attracting a relatively large crowd. Stoney Creek Brewery was packed and Jimin pointed out Sam’s car as we pass by. 

“Looks like he came out with Otis and Skye,” He murmured.

Otis was another personal trainer at the gym, and Skye was responsible for marketing. They had been going out for a while now and made plan to move to Ann Arbor once Otis graduated from school. He was getting his masters in movement science at the University of Michigan. They had planned on moving out there when he graduated last year, but neither of them could find a job that could pay their bills. Otis was hoping the master’s would give him a competitive edge while Skye saved up enough money to start her own advertising firm.

“Think Gigi is with them?” I wondered.

“Probably not. She’s busy studying for an exam. I saw that she requested time off tomorrow and the day after, so I don’t think she has the time to go out for drinks.”

Giselle was getting her bachelor’s in dental hygiene at UM, and everytime I spoke to her she was swamped with work. I had no idea she needed to request time off, though. Must be an intense program.

“Did you ever go to college?” I asked Jimin. 

He nodded, “I got my bachelor’s in psychology.”

Well, I had not been expecting that. 

“Really?”

“Yeah, but I never went back to get my master’s,” We turned onto the long road that led to his parent’s house. “I might after the Olympics.”

It was interesting to hear about his goals post-swimming. I never had those. My entire life was going to be swimming, and then, once I could no longer compete, I was opening my own swim school. After a couple of years of coaching under my belt, the plan was to start training professional athletes until I could join the Olympic coaching team. The accident was a very traumatic and eye-opening experience for me, so most of those plans ended up getting changed and modified over the years.

“What about you?” Jimin asked, pulling up to the curb.

“I went through an accelerated program at UCCS. Just graduated with my Masters in Athletic Training back in April.”

Neither one of us seemed to be ready to break the bubble we created. Even if we were just talking about school, it felt too intimate to leave. Holding hands in my car was new and I was worried if I opened the car door all of this would turn out to be a dream. The date, the confession; all of it. 

“I should get going,” Jimin sighed, still not moving his hand from mine. “It’s late and I have to drive home.”

I was the first one to move away. He was right. It was almost midnight and I had a really difficult time tonight. All of that yelling really took a toll on me. Jimin did not move until he heard the click of my seatbelt unfastening. 

“See you tomorrow?” He asked when I rounded the car. Getting out of the car, he held the door open as I slid inside. “I know we were out later than we thought we’d be.”

I nodded, “We can have a late morning. 8:30 instead of 6.”

“Sounds good. See you then.”

He closed my car door and jogged to his truck. It was parked in the driveway today. I pressed the button to roll my window down. 

“Drive safe!” I called out.

Looking over his shoulder, Jimin grinned and threw a hand up. I watched him climb into Fiona and tried to keep myself from worrying too much. It was so dark outside and he could be exhausted behind the wheel. Who knows what could happen to him.

He caught me staring and waved at me again. I returned it with a small smile. The truck stopped for a second and his phone was his hand. My cell phone vibrated in the cupholder.

Jimin: I’ll be okay

Jimin: Text you when I get home, k?

Looking back at the truck, I found him already looking at me. I nodded my response. He smiled at me again, waved, before finally backing out of the driveway. I did not move until I could no longer see his truck in my rearview. My phone buzzed one more time.

Jimin: At the stop sign on Woodland and Ann Arbor-Saline

Jimin: Go home. I’m here. I’m fine.

I hesitated texting him back when I knew he was driving, but decided that I would just have to trust he would not open it until it was safe.

Me: Get out of my head, kid

Finally putting my car in drive, I threw my phone back in its spot and made the ten minute drive down the road to the Anderson house. All of the lights were off when I pulled up and I was as quiet as a mouse walking to the backyard. 

I was beyond tired but still needed to get my nighttime routine done. Stripping out of my clothes, I turned on the shower and took off my makeup. Tonight wasn’t a wash night, so I was not in the shower for long. I heard my phone vibrating as I put on lotion and I quickly threw on a night shirt and went to my bedroom.

Jimin: Who says you aren’t in mine, meemaw

Jimin: I’m home now so you can get some sleep

Jimin: Night, geezer

I snorted. That was a new one. Crawling into bed, I got comfortable under my blankets and thought about a good comeback.

Me: Thank you

Me: Geezer? That’s such an geriatric thing to say, you whippersnapper

Jimin: LOL night 🫰🏼

Me: Night 🌜

I quick sent Taehyung a text to make sure he and Milo go home safely before putting my phone on the charger. Jungkook sent a text to our group chat an hour ago to let us know he was in his apartment back in Detroit. He was in Ann Arbor so often since Darcy lived out here, but he had bought a multi-million dollar home in Corktown when was first signed to the Red Wings in 2019. Milo was the one to reply to my text, signing his name at the bottom, since Taehyung passed out in the car on their way back home.

I took my medications and started up a game of solitaire while I waited for them to kick in. My psychologist had sent me to Michigan with a three month supply. I was planning my first trip back next week so I could see the boys in time for their first big competition of the season. While I was in town, I would pick up another three month supply. We were making the arrangements work as best as we could, and I was lucky I had a large group of people willing to support me during this transition.

Finally I felt the sleeping pills kicking in and I went to my white noise app. I hated falling asleep in silence and Emery had suggested the app while we were in a session. I paid for a yearly subscription and never regretted the fifty bucks. It had been a huge help in lulling me to bed.

Lights out and blankets wrapped snugly around my body, I closed my eyes and thought about everything that had happened. Jimin liked me back, asked me on a date, and told all of his friends about his infatuation with me before I even realized something else was going on. I was his dream girl. That put a lazy smile on my face. Then, I could no longer think about anything and was plunged into a dreamless sleep.

Taglist: @ownthesunshine @screamertannie @lovelytaes-blog @pernesianparapio @tae-with-some-suga @sumzysworld @chimmisbae @adventures-in-bookland

© chimcess, 2024. Do not copy or repost without permission.

#bts #bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #park jimin #bts jimin #jimin fanfiction #jimin fanfic #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin fanfic #bts angst #bts fluff #bts smut #jimin fluff #jimin angst #jimin smut #bts au #strangers to lovers #jimin x y/n #jimin x you #jimin x reader #bts x y/n #bts x you #bts x reader #bts scenarios #kim seokjin #kim namjoon #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #jung hoseok #min yoongi

[kingofbodyrolls]

39,5°C (Fever) (m) | pjm

Thank you to everybody who follows, either for my own fics or my recs - it's much appreciated and means so much to me 🥹 So, for my 100th follower milestone, I give you this; I hope you like it 💜

Pairing: Jimin x reader (female, “Y/N”)

Genre/AU: Established relationship, non idol!au, pwp, smut, fluff if you squint

Rating: mature/explicit/R18

Word count: 6,2K

Summary: When you get sick you want three things; rest all day, eat your comfort food and have as many orgasms as you can.

Disclaimer: I do not own BTS or know them personally and this work of fiction is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only. The actions and personalities described in the story do not reflect those of BTS— it’s just fiction. Also, if you would kindly read the tags/warnings before reading, that would be lovely: and if you don’t like whatever is described in the tags, just hit return and find something else to read. Thank you 🌸

Warnings/tags: Explicit smut in the form of, masturbation (female), fingering, nipple sucking/play, unprotected penetration (they are in an established relationship, but please use protection irl), some cock warming, a lot of orgasms, fucking while sick, OC is so fucking needy and desperate and Jimin just wants to please her.

This is mature/explicit content, so minors, please do not interact.

Main masterlist. Cross-posted to Ao3.

Morning light filtered through the curtains, painting the room in soft hues as you slowly roused from sleep. 

Blinking away the remnants of dreams, you stretched languidly, only to realize that the warmth next to you, Jimin, was absent. 

Confusion furrowed your brow, a dull ache throbbing at your temples. It was as if your mind was wading through a fog, struggling to piece together the events leading up to this moment.

A damp sensation beneath you snapped your senses awake. 

Panic fluttered in your chest as you registered the wetness on the bed. 

Your skin prickled with discomfort, a blend of clammy sweat and shivers that chased each other up and down your spine. Hot and cold sensations mingled, creating a disorienting dance across your flesh. Your body trembled and you felt a surge of arousal run to your core, a telltale sign of a fever. 

A hand to your forehead confirmed your suspicions - heat radiated from your skin, the feverish touch undeniable. The realization sent a sinking feeling through you, an unwelcome interruption to your routine. 

You contemplated checking your temperature, not just to provide a concrete reason for your absence from work, but also to validate the intensity of what you were experiencing.

With a resigned sigh, you fumbled for the thermometer, its cool surface a stark contrast to your fevered skin. 

As you watched the numbers climb, anxiety held its breath alongside you. 39,5 degrees Celsius glared back, a glaring testament to your body’s turmoil. ‘Yikes’ barely covers the magnitude of this fever, the word echoing like an alarm in your mind.

Reluctantly, you reached for your phone, fingers dancing over the screen to dial your workplace. 

Explaining your condition to your boss felt like admitting defeat, you were rarely sick, a palpable sensation of vulnerability washing over you. The conversation passed in a blur, your voice sounding distant even in your own ears as you negotiated the details of your sick leave.

Once the call ended, you were left with the weight of the day ahead - or rather, the weight of what wouldn’t be. You really love your damn office job. Resignation settled in as you acknowledged that rest was your sole agenda. 

This was no mere inconvenience; it was a mandate from your own body, an uncompromising insistence on self-care.

Your thoughts drift through a dense fog, each one a weighty presence that seems to slow time itself. 

Amidst this mental haze, a singular desire emerges, commanding your attention like a beacon in the darkness; to get off.

When you get sick, you’re out of commission, but Jimin possesses remarkable resilience, bouncing back from ailments with an almost enviable speed. He might slow his pace a tad, yet he’s soon up and running again, his vigor only temporarily dimmed. 

However, your own journey through illness is an entirely different narrative. When illness casts its shadow upon you, it’s as if the world grinds to a halt - a relentless fog that blankets your thoughts and body. 

You only want three things really; rest all day, eat your comfort food and have as many orgasms as you can.

It’s a craving that rises like a tempest, demanding to be acknowledged. 

The desire for intimacy, for the warmth and connection that only your boyfriend can provide, becomes a beacon in the haze of your illness. It’s a need that fluctuates in intensity, an ebb and flow that mirrors the unpredictable nature of your symptoms. 

In a daze, you squeeze your thighs together while dirty fantasies run through your mind.

Determinedly, you set your sights on the first craving: a day of uninterrupted rest. 

As the world outside continues its bustling rhythm, you cocoon yourself in a cocoon of blankets, the soft embrace of your bed a sanctuary from the demands of the day. A season of your cherished TV show flickers on the screen before you, its familiar characters and storylines a comforting companion in this isolated respite. 

Yet, even the most captivating narrative can’t entirely distract from the persistent itch of restlessness. As episodes blur into one another, you find your mind wandering, the confinement of your surroundings reflecting the confines of your own body. 

The hours stretch, each minute an elastic band tugging at your patience.

The promise of comfort food beckons like a siren’s call, and soon, the aromatic allure of pizza fills the room. 

You indulge in its cheesy embrace, the combination of flavors a temporary reprieve from both your physical discomfort and the monotony of your confinement. The first bite is a symphony of sensations - crisp crust giving way to a burst of savory satisfaction, a moment of bliss that lingers on your taste buds. But even indulgence has its limits. 

As the pizza slices dwindle and the ice cream follows suit, the novelty wanes, leaving behind a subtle undertone of longing. You try navigating the vast expanse of social media, but it yields little in the way of fulfillment, each swipe a fleeting encounter with curated lives that only serve to amplify the quiet void within.

Your energy reserves are far too depleted to muster the focus required for anything more substantial.

In time, you discover yourself reclined upon the bed’s embrace, solitary in Jimin’s absence, your eyes are gently shut, a willing surrender to the world’s demands, while the low sensual R&B beats of your beloved ‘dirty hoe’ Spotify playlist weave a cocoon around your senses, cradling you in a symphony of horny melodies on an endless loop. 

You rub your thighs together and get lost in the bliss of the feeling. You’ve got nothing to do. Might as well do yourself.

Your fingers glaze the top of your panties, digging deeper until you reach the spot just over your clit. 

Rubbing circles on your clothed clit, you spread your legs and throw your head back into the bed, already feeling the beginning of an arousal. You can’t help the sweet noises that escape your mouth, as you roll your hips in search of more friction. 

You press harder on your clit, imagining it’s Jimin’s hands instead of yours, knowing that he would be able to make you climax in a matter of minutes. 

Pinching your clit, you let out a high pitched moan as you feel the knot in your stomach forming. 

Images of Jimin flash before your eyes, him kissing you deliciously, fucking you like it was the last time.

Beads of sweat gather along the precipice of your hairline, a glistening testament to the fevered symphony playing out within. 

Each breath you draw is a ragged melody, a reminder of the battle your body wages against the searing heat that courses through you. You set a fast pace, rubbing mindlessly, as you pant for air. 

Almost there, you can feel it coming. 

In frustration, you pinch your clit again and come undone with a scream of Jimin’s name. 

Your body thrashes around the bed, as you come down from your climax. 

Your thoughts wade through a dizzying haze, an intricate labyrinth where clarity is but a fleeting visitor. Meanwhile, your body becomes a canvas of discomfort, a sticky and clammy landscape painted by the relentless brushstrokes of sweat. 

You register an uncomfortable wetness between your legs, and discard your soaked panties to the floor.

Your body remains a furnace, its warmth radiating through every fiber as you continue to draw breath in ragged gasps. Seeking relief, you shift onto your stomach, a desperate attempt to find a position that might offer some respite. 

Your hand gropes beneath the pillow, finding the cool touch of your phone. Fingers trembling slightly, you navigate to Instagram in pursuit of distraction, a temporary escape from the confines of your condition.

Yet, the respite is fleeting, evaporating like mist in the face of a relentless sun. Your desires surge once more, a hunger that refuses to be quelled. The allure of the digital world fades in comparison to the voracious craving that commands your attention, rendering your attempts at diversion feeble and futile.

You surrender to the tempest within, rolling onto your back as your hands traverse the landscape of your fevered body, fingers tracing the contours of your clammy skin. 

They land on your already pebbled nipples, and you give them a hard tug, moaning and rolling your hips mindlessly. 

Jimin's cotton shirt adheres to your skin like a second layer, a tactile reminder of the stickiness that has become an unwelcome companion. 

With a sudden resolve, you sit up, a surge of urgency propelling you as you shed the shirt in a swift motion, the fabric slipping away like the bonds of discomfort being cast aside.

In a matter of seconds, your hands return to your breast, cupping them like Jimin usually does. 

Your fingers run over your nipples again, and you feel a tingle run down your spine. As you tug and pinch your nipples, you imagine it’s Jimin doing it. 

The way he would lick your perked buds, occasionally giving them a light bite has your walls clenching around nothing. 

You moan, thinking about the pleasure Jimin usually delivers to you with his plush and wet tongue. 

One of your hands leaves your breast to travel down to your throbbing naked pussy. 

Spreading your legs, you find your clit and give it a few rubs. 

Your fingers glide easily, as your clit is covered in your earlier orgasm. Your fingers travel down to your folds, opening yourself up more. 

Sticking one of your fingers into your warm cunt is easy with the insane amount of arousal pooled there. 

You groan in pleasure, as you stick another finger into your clenching hole. 

Rolling your hips, you begin to fuck yourself as your other hand is pinching and tugging a nipple. 

Once more, a hazy fog blankets your thoughts, veiling your mental landscape in a disorienting mist. 

In this moment, your deepest wish unfurls - a longing for Jimin’s presence, his soothing touch, the steady rhythm of his breath and the unfaltering warmth of his embrace to tether you amidst the turbulence of your body’s rebellion. 

The feeble attempt you make to alleviate your distress pales in comparison to the soothing magic that Jimin's touch possesses. It's a stark reminder of the chasm between your efforts and his unparalleled comfort. 

Nonetheless, in this interim of absence, your makeshift remedy will have to suffice, bridging the gap between your yearning for relief and the eventual embrace of his return.

You think about Jimin fucking you with his thick cock, stretching your pussy deliciously. 

Hitting your g-spot, and thrusting into you with fervor, while his balls hit your folds. The imagination, a force as potent as it is relentless, takes hold of you with unyielding fervor, reducing the barriers between reality and desire to mere dust. 

In its wake, you sense the foundations of your resolve begin to erode, like cliffs succumbing to the relentless assault of waves. 

Squelching sounds fill the room, as you finger yourself frantically, searching for another release. 

A palpable tension simmers, coiling like a slumbering tempest just beneath the fragile surface of your composure and when the image of Jimin fucking you gets too much, you moan loudly as another orgasm coats your walls. 

Your chest rises and falls in desperate rhythms, each breath a struggle as you labor to coax your body into a state of surrender.

A gnawing sense of insufficiency takes root, an undeniable truth that settles like an ache in the core of your being. 

Compelled to fill this void, you reach for your laptop, your fingers dancing across the keyboard to unearth a video - a cherished artifact of you and Jimin. 

As the footage unfolds before you, you stick your fingers into your already drenched pussy again. 

As the symphony of sounds spills forth, a captivating crescendo that weaves through the air, your gaze becomes ensnared by the screen's luminous embrace, you fuck yourself again, while you rub your clit with your other hand.

“Ah, Y/N, you’re so tight! You’re taking me so well.” Jimin's voice pours forth, a mellifluous cascade that saturates the room, its dulcet tones mingling with the very air you breathe, a sweet intoxication that leaves you hovering on the edge of delirium, rolling your eyes while you search for yet another release. 

You add another finger into your throbbing pussy as the screen shows Jimin fucking you from behind. 

A moan leaves your lips, mixing with squelching sounds from your pussy and the obscene sounds from the laptop.

“This pussy was made for me, ah.” video Jimin says followed with a slap to your ass. 

Your pussy clenches around your fingers. Your clit is throbbing with your fast rubbing on it and you insert another finger into your cunt, finally feeling a small stretch. 

You feel your orgasm approaching rapidly, with the images of your home made porn playing before your hooded eyes unraveling you.

“Fuck! I’m coming!” and then you’re orgasming to the sound and visual of Jimin releasing inside your warm and spent pussy. 

Your body throbs with a weary cadence, each pulse echoing the exhaustion that courses through you, leaving you feeling spent, both physically and emotionally. 

The discomfort intensifies, a relentless reminder of your sticky, sweat-slicked state that clings to you like an unwelcome second skin, refusing to relent. 

You draw in ragged breaths, your lungs yearning for air as you hastily halt the video's playback, the sudden cessation of sound echoing the turbulence within your chest.

Tired, you envelop yourself in the gentle glow of the screen, as you dive into another episode of your treasured TV series. You lay in your bed, naked, with only the covers draping your legs. 

The door’s soft creak heralds Jimin’s return, his presence a soothing balm to the quietude that has wrapped itself around you. 

As his eyes fall upon your prone form nestled within the sheets, his gaze deepens with understanding - silent communication that transcends words. 

Without a syllable spoken, he knows about your illness.

A gentle smile dances at the corners of his lips, a mixture of concern and affection that paints his features. His voice, warm and tender, breaks the silence, the words like a soft caress against your weary senses. 

“How many, baby?” 

The question hangs in the air, laden with a delicate balance of worry and steadfast promise that he’s here to shoulder the burden of your discomfort alongside you.

With the mere entrance of Jimin's presence, a subtle electric current courses down the length of your spine, a tingling sensation that dances between the realms of anticipation and recognition, as you rub your thighs together and bite your lip, “Three.”

A gentle chuckle escapes from his plush lips, a melodic sound that unfurls like a whisper of warmth, as he strides toward the bed and eases down beside you, his presence a soothing balm to your discomfort.

“You know it’s a vital part of my self-care ritual whenever fever pays me a visit,” you protest, your lips pursing in a playful pout that hints at a mixture of defiance and endearing vulnerability.

“Yeah, I know about your fever horniness,” his laughter erupts with a resonant force, a vibrant symphony that reverberates through his entire being, yet his approach is marked by a smirk that dances across his lips, an alluring blend of amusement and intention.

“What do you need, baby?” 

His finger traces a tantalizing path over the sensitive expanse of your ass and thighs, each touch akin to a lightning bolt of sensation that ignites a perilous shiver, sending a cascade of exhilaration down the length of your spine. In its wake, a fresh wave of desire surges, pooling on your pussy.

A gulp tightens your throat, a visible testament to the sudden intensity of the moment, while your breath catches in your chest, a gasp that hangs in the charged air like an unspoken invitation, “Your dick and your tongue.”

“Hmmm, I don’t know,” a playful smirk graces his lips, a mischievous expression that hints at a secret understanding, as his touch traces a tantalizing path along the contours of your waist as he feels his dick throb with want.

“You started without me,” he utters the words in a mock pout, his tone a blend of teasing and longing, as his fingers dip down to your pussy with deliberate intent, trailing a path that ignites a symphony of sensations. 

You raise your hips in search of more of his touch.

“I’m sorry. But I couldn’t wait…” A frustrated whimper escapes your lips, a raw sound that encapsulates the intensity of your desires and the ache for more. 

You just want to get off again.

“I know, baby. You probably did so good by yourself, huh?” 

His gaze drinks in the contours of your naked form, an appreciative hunger that's palpable, causing goosebumps to rise like a symphony across the landscape of your skin.

“Not as good as when you touch me. I need your touch, Jimin.” 

In a voice etched with ragged urgency, you plead, the words a raw testament to the overwhelming desire that courses through you, while your lustful eyes blink rapidly, revealing the depth of your need.

He seizes a generous handful of your ass, an electrifying touch that sends shockwaves of pleasure reverberating through your being. In response, you groan, your very essence melting under the mastery of his hands, reduced to pliable putty that he molds with deliberate expertise.

You open your legs invitingly, showing him your glistening pussy, “Won’t you come taste me?”

A teasing flick of his tongue moistens his lips, a gesture loaded with an unspoken promise, as he inches closer to you, his presence a tantalizing magnetism that sends anticipation crackling through the air. 

His form hovers over yours, a suspended moment pregnant with the weight of desire and the thrill of what's to come.

“Since you asked so nicely.” 

In a voice dipped in seductive tones, he murmurs the words, a sultry invitation that hangs in the charged space between you, as he positions himself on his knees. 

The fabric of his shirt yields to his skilled fingers, sliding off his form in a fluid motion that reveals the sculpted contours of his body, each movement a declaration of intent. His bare chest emerges into view, an arresting sight that captures your gaze and holds it captive, a canvas painted with the contours of his sculpted form. 

Your eyes trace the lines of his delicious abs, his ‘Nevermind’ tattoo, a visual feast that leaves you with an insatiable hunger, and your fingers, guided by a magnetic pull, begin to explore his torso with a reverent touch.

He leans in with a calculated grace, his intent clear in the intensity of his gaze, as both of his hands find the curves of your breasts, his palms cupping them with a touch that conveys possession and longing. 

A moan of pleasure escapes your lips, a raw sound that encapsulates the exquisite sensation that courses through you, as his hands remain a source of warmth on your fevered form, a stark contrast that heightens the sensory journey. 

An involuntary surge of sensation propels your body, causing your back to arch with a fervent response, an unspoken invitation for more of his touch, as he begins to roll your nipples. 

He leans his head down, giving a nipple a quick lick before he captures it in his warm mouth. He sucks lightly at first, while he pinches your other nipple.

The melodic cadence of your sounds forms an intoxicating symphony, an improvised composition that resonates in the charged air, while a surge of arousal courses through you, electrifying your senses and heightening the fervor of the moment.

One of Jimin's hands embarks on an exploratory journey down the landscape of your body, a purposeful exploration that leads to your pussy, where his touch transforms into an unyielding grasp, squeezing your clit with a deliberate force that ignites a symphony of pleasure-pain.

You release a crescendo of uninhibited sounds, each one a testament to the exquisite sensitivity that courses through you, a maelstrom of sensations amplified by the presence of your already three orgasms.

His fingers, a skillful symphony of touch, bestow a few tantalizing rubs to your clit, a prelude to the main act that follows. 

With deliberate intent, he slides a finger into the depths of your wet pussy, each movement a rapturous dance that sends shockwaves of pleasure through your every nerve ending.

“So wet,” a chuckle, laced with both amusement and desire, escapes his lips, the room now painted with an intimate soundscape as the squelching echoes through the air. 

His single finger, a masterful conductor of sensations, explores the depths of your being, each thrust a declaration of intent that creates a symphony of pleasure only the two of you share.

He returns to his skilled ministrations sucking on one of your nipples, a sensation that unfurls like a velvet caress, while his other hand continues its purposeful exploration, working to fuck you open with a deliberate determination that merges pleasure with a heady sense of anticipation.

A surge of urgency courses through you, compelling your hips to roll with a fervent rhythm, an instinctive dance that strives to align with his thrust, seeking a nexus where desire and connection intertwine in a symphony of shared pleasure.

He skillfully introduces a second finger into the equation, his touch an intricate dance that navigates the canvas of your pussy with purposeful intent. 

His quest becomes a search for the elusive spot that ignites a cascade of sensations, a treasure trove of pleasure concealed within the intricate pathways of your body.

Your breaths escape in ragged bursts, a symphony of urgency that fills the air, each inhalation a desperate attempt to quench the growing fire within. 

As your chest heaves, you huff for air, the oxygen a lifeline that barely keeps pace with the tumultuous pace of your desires, all while a knot of anticipation tightens in the pit of your stomach, a tangible reminder of the impending climax.

A third finger joins the symphony of sensation, a deliberate intrusion that causes your pussy to clench around him, an involuntary reaction that amplifies the intensity of the moment. 

The palpable tightness he encounters tells him that you're teetering on the precipice of release, a knowledge that fuels his own desire.

With the dexterity born of desire, his free hand embarks on an exploratory journey, seeking out your other breast with a determined touch. 

His fingers dance with a skilled grace, deftly rolling its nipple, each movement a calculated rhythm that weaves an intoxicating tapestry of sensations, a tactile duet that resonates through your being.

“It’s so good, Jimin!” a gasp, unfiltered and primal, escapes your lips, the sound a testament to the exquisite pleasure that courses through you, as you endeavor to arch your back, an instinctual response that seeks to press your body into the electrifying path of his touch.

A low, reverberating hum escapes his lips, a resonant vibration that sends ripples of pleasure through your breast, the intimate connection between his mouth and your body forging a sensory bridge that defies words. 

Meanwhile, his fingers continue their masterful dance, striking your elusive spot with a relentless rhythm that sets your senses ablaze with each deliberate touch.

You feel it coursing through your body like a surge of electric intensity, each nerve ending awakening in a symphony of sensation. 

Your toes curl involuntarily, a physical manifestation of the overwhelming pleasure that radiates from within. 

Your hands seize Jimin's hips with a fervent grip, an anchor in the tempest of ecstasy as you succumb to the cascade of release, a moan escaping your lips like a melody, a reverberating chord that sounds eerily like his name.

You pant, your breath a delirious cadence that echoes the crescendo of sensations that have washed over you. 

Your body basks in the radiant afterglow of a fourth orgasm, a testament to the heights of pleasure scaled throughout the day, each peak and valley etched into your memory like an intricate map of desire.

Jimin's gaze rests upon you, his eyes hooded with a potent blend of desire and satisfaction, a witness to the tableau of your body's unraveling beneath the skilled ministrations of his hands and mouth. 

In this intimate exchange, unspoken understanding flows between you, a language woven from shared pleasure and the unbreakable bond you share. 

The depth of his affection knows no bounds, a love that transcends the ordinary and propels him to the edges of devotion. For you, he's willing to traverse any distance, cross any threshold, and brave any challenge. 

His heart beats in harmony with yours, a melody of adoration that echoes through the moments you share, an unwavering testament to the lengths he'll go to ensure your happiness and well-being.

He rises onto his knees with an irresistible allure, shedding the confines of his pants and boxers in a fluid motion that unveils his already hardened dick. 

The air seems to crackle with anticipation, the atmosphere thickening as his form becomes a portrait of primal need and unabashed vulnerability.

Your tongue darts out, an instinctual gesture that moistens your lips in a silent anticipation that hangs in the charged space between you, a silent agreement forged by desire. 

“Gawd. It’s so beautiful.” 

You say, the words a sultry whisper that hangs in the air like a secret promise, a declaration of intent that sets the stage for what's to come. 

Your hand reaches out, fingers wrapping around his cock with a teasing touch, each stroke a deliberate dance that fuels the fire of desire between you.

Jimin's chuckle, a featherlight sound that dances through the charged atmosphere, becomes an auditory caress that sends shivers down your spine. 

His form hovers over you, a poised predator basking in the thrill of the chase, the air practically crackling with the intensity of his presence.

"What do you crave now, baby?" he murmurs in a voice saturated with a potent blend of desire and longing, a low timbre that wraps around the words like a silken caress, igniting a spark of anticipation in the air.

“I want to be ravished,” your hips engage in a rhythmic dance, a deliberate movement that aligns with the symphony of sensations cascading through you, while the telltale sensation of sweat prickling down your forehead adds a tactile layer to the sensory landscape, a physical manifestation of the fevered desire coursing through your veins.

“I want to cream your dick,” you breathe, the exhalation a fragile bridge between reality and reverie, as the haze of desire blankets your thoughts in a seductive shroud. 

In response, a hiss escapes Jimin's lips, a sound that teeters on the edge of restraint, a symphony of shared yearning that hangs heavy in the charged air.

“I want you to come in my pussy.” You tease, the words a playful invitation that resonates with the promise of shared pleasure, your voice a delicate melody that dances through the charged atmosphere. 

Your hands find purchase on his thighs, fingers squeezing with an artful pressure that ignites a symphony of sensation, a tactile duet that harmonizes with the unspoken desires that course between you.

Jimin's hiss echoes once more, a sound that reverberates like a whispered plea amidst the charged tension, as if his very being is ensnared within a cloud of desire and longing. 

His dick, a pulsating ache that demands attention, throbs with an insistent rhythm, a relentless reminder of the friction and release that his body craves, a symphony of need that courses through his veins.

With a firm resolve that belies the intensity of his desire, he seizes his dick in a purposeful grip, aligning it with your pussy. 

The air seems to hold its breath, a suspended moment pregnant with anticipation, the magnetic pull between your bodies poised to culminate in an explosion of shared ecstasy.

Before he gives in to the tempest of desire that surges between you, a primal force that demands satisfaction, he seizes a pillow with a thoughtfulness that speaks volumes. 

With a gentle nudge, he situates it beneath your head, a gesture that adds a layer of comfort to the impending intimacy, a reminder that amidst the flames of passion, he's attuned to your every need.

Then, in a languid dance that seems to stretch time itself, he eases into you with a deliberate slowness, his cock head parting your folds in a teasing, torturous symphony of sensation. The exquisite friction becomes a dance of pleasure and anticipation, a measured cadence that ignites every nerve ending along the way, as he navigates the delicate balance between fervor and restraint.

His dick glides into you effortlessly, aided by the slickness that envelops him, a liquid promise of pleasure that makes every inch of his entry a journey of shared ecstasy. 

As he becomes one with you, your walls embrace him with a tantalizing grip, a response that reflects the profound connection between your bodies, a fusion of desire and intimacy that transcends mere physicality.

“Ah, you’re still so tight,” 

He releases a breath he didn't even realize he was holding, a sound that escapes in a mixture of relief and surrender, as he reaches the depths of your being, a tangible joining that renders him fully immersed in the euphoria of the moment.

You savor the overwhelming fullness that finally envelops you, a sensation that satiates the craving that has persisted throughout the day. 

It's the culmination of a desire that's been building, being filled to the brim with the thickness of Jimin's dick, a union that ignites a shiver coursing down your spine, electrifying every nerve ending. As the moment unfolds, he initiates a slow retreat, a movement that draws you both through a symphony of sensations, a dance that echoes the intimacy of your connection.

He surges forward once more, a determined movement that drives him to the very hilt, his relentless desire mirrored in each of his swift thrusts. 

With a masterful touch, he discovers your hidden spot in mere moments, a revelation that sends shockwaves of pleasure through you, the intensity of the sensation causing your vision to blur as the world momentarily fades, overtaken by the overwhelming cascade of ecstasy.

“Fuck, Y/N,” he pants, the rhythm of his breath a synchrony with the fervent pace at which he fucks you, his grip on your hips an anchor that thethers you to the reality of the moment. 

His dick plunges into you with an unyielding force, a declaration of possession that melds raw passion with an unspoken promise of unity. 

He artfully guides one of your legs up, positioning it against his torso in a deliberate display of intimacy, your foot finding purchase against his neck in a sensual image. 

With this angle, he plunges into you with a newfound depth, each thrust a revelation of pleasure that leaves you breathless, the arrangement of your bodies a testament to the choreography of desire that unfolds between you.

“Ah! Jimin!” you release a breathless moan, a symphony of pleasure and vulnerability that dances on the edge of bliss, a melody woven from the rawest depths of your desire.

“I’m so fucking close,” you pant with each measured breath, caught in the intoxicating rhythm of his thrusts, a symphony of desire that leaves you gasping for air between each electrifying connection.

One of his hands embarks on a deliberate exploration, seeking out your swollen clit with an intent that radiates through his touch. The glide of his thumb becomes a source of intoxicating sensation, igniting a cascade of pleasure that courses through your body.

“Ah!” a breathless cry escapes your lips, the sound a mixture of surprise and ecstasy as the sensations wash over you, while your body responds with an instinctual arch, a graceful curve that seeks to amplify the pleasure within the constraints of the position. 

“Fuck!” the word bursts forth, nearly a scream but instead a fervent exclamation, a testament to the overwhelming pleasure that courses through you. 

Simultaneously, Jimin's fingers continue their skilled dance, maintaining a tantalizing rhythm on your clit, while his dick delivers deep and forceful thrusts that threaten to unravel your senses entirely. 

With a primal scream that carries his name on its wings, your release squirts forth in a torrent, an explosion of sensation that engulfs his dick and fingers. 

The world around you dissolves into a white-hot haze, your vision momentarily obliterated by the intensity of the moment, as you pant in a frantic rhythm, each breath a lifeline that stitches you back to the reality of the room. 

The culmination of pleasure leaves you suspended in a euphoric liminality, every nerve ending aflame with the afterglow of ecstasy.

“Fuck!” Jimin's hiss reverberates in the charged air, a testament to the exquisite sensation that courses through him as your walls clamp around him, an embrace so tight that it borders on suffocating intensity. 

As the waves of your orgasm surge through you, a tempest of sensation that engulfs your being, his thrusts mirror the tumultuous rhythm of your release. 

Each movement becomes a study in controlled chaos, his own desire reaching a crescendo as he hurtles towards his own climax. 

“Ah! I’m coming, babe!” he pants with a rhythm that mirrors the frenzy of his desire, each breath a tangible testament to the passion that courses through him. 

With a final, hard thrust, he stills within you, his essence flooding your depths in a torrent of warm cum that paints your walls with an intimate declaration of shared intimacy. 

He surges forward, a final thrust that extends the boundaries of pleasure, his movements a testament to his need to savor every last fragment of the climax he rides out. 

The rhythm becomes a reflection of his own ecstasy, each thrust a stroke of intimacy that weaves a tapestry of shared release between your bodies, a culmination that leaves you both suspended in the aftermath of pleasure.

Despite the sheen of sweat that adorns your skin and the fever that courses through your veins, an urgent need propels you to draw him close, your arms enveloping his form in an embrace that defies the constraints of physical discomfort. 

Your body radiates heat, a testament to the fever's grip, yet the desire to feel his heartbeat against your own is a force that eclipses all else. 

“It’s hardly fair,” you remark with a playful huff, a mixture of exasperation and laughter tingling your words, “that you’re not even breaking a sweat.” 

The words carry a lightness that dances amidst the weight of your fevered state, the exchange a testament to the shared intimacy that allows for such candid moments even in the midst of vulnerability.

“I guess I’ve got better stamina, sweetheart,” he chuckles, the sound a gentle ripple that lingers in the air, even as his dick goes soft within the warmth of your pussy. 

With a tenderness that belies the intensity that has passed between you, he seals the moment with a sweet kiss pressed to your lips, a lingering connection that speaks of the intimacy shared and the unbreakable bond that defines your connection.

A blend of his cum and your own arousal trickles from your heated core, a physical reminder of the fervent exchange that has unfolded between you. 

He withdraws from you completely, a deliberate movement that creates a sudden void, a palpable absence that contrasts with the intensity of moments prior. 

Slumping down beside you, his breaths come in ragged pants, each exhalation a testament to the exertion of shared pleasure. 

The space between your bodies becomes a canvas that captures the echoes of your intimate dance, an image of vulnerability and release that lingers in the air like a whisper.

A sense of emptiness washes over you, an aftermath of the profound connection that has left a void in its wake. Your lips form a subtle pout, a silent plea that rests in the curve of your expression, a wordless request for the closeness and intimacy that you yearn to preserve. 

“Oh, I know that look,” he chuckles softly, the sound a warm caress that mingles with the air, as his hand sweeps through his blond hair. 

The knowing amusement in his eyes speaks of an unspoken understanding between you, a connection forged through countless shared moments, a familiarity that transcends words.

Beside him, you shift restlessly, a subtle squirm that speaks volumes about the growing hunger within you. 

Your thighs press together with a desperate urgency, a physical manifestation of the insatiable desire that has rekindled within your core. 

The air seems to crackle with anticipation, the atmosphere electrified by the magnetic pull between your bodies, a force that threatens to engulf you both once again in the flames of shared longing.

“Just give me an hour or two, then we can go again,” he chuckles softly, the sound a tender reassurance that carries within it a promise of more to come. 

His lips nuzzle against the delicate curve of your neck, a gesture that's both affectionate and possessive, the fervor of his kisses an echo of the passion that simmers between you. The intensity of his touch leaves a mark, a phantom sensation that lingers even after his lips have moved away, a tangible reminder of the connection that binds you together.

Author’s note: I get incredibly horny when I have a fever, so this idea popped into my head 😇 My husband calls it “fever horny” 🤣 I’m so sorry, am I the only who’s like this? 🫢

#bts smut #bts fic #bts fanfic #bts x reader smut #bts x y/n #bts x you #bts x reader #jimin x reader #jimin x you #jimin x y/n #jimin x reader smut #bts jimin x reader #park jimin x you #park jimin x reader #park jimin x y/n #pjm smut #pjm x reader #bts pjm #park jimin smut #park jimin imagines #bts jimin fanfic #jimin fanfic #park jimin fanfiction #jimin scenarios #jimin imagines

[oddinary4bts]

I want to be with you | pjm (teaser)

☆ summary : moving to Seoul has always seemed like a good idea, until the bubble bursts when you realize your new neighbour is Park Jimin, and he's not the sweet angel you've always imagined him to be. Will the reality of Park Jimin forever be a nightmare, or will he turn into a sweet dream?

☆ pairing: Park Jimin x female reader

☆rating: 18+

☆genre: strangers (fan) to friends to lovers, idol!au; fluff, some slight angst, smut

☆warnings: mention of cheating, asshole jimin for a few moments, a tiny little bit of jealousy, alcohol consumption, throwing up, oral sex (female receiving), edging, fingering, badly written dirty talk, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it babes), slightly dom! jimin, reader is shy and awkward and might give you a little bit of secondhand embarrassment, sad love confession

☆word count: 31.9k words (oops lmao)

☆a/n: I've started writing this a while ago and felt like posting for a long time but couldn't convince myself to do it. Started reading some of @taegularities fics and rid really inspired me to start posting again so here's to nothing (thank you rid for giving me the courage to do something I used to love again <3)

☆a/n pt 2: this is one of my first ever moodboards, so please don't be too harsh haha (I am aware it's not great, I have literally no talent in editing pictures and doing collages lmao)

---

"What did you just do?"

"I kissed you..."

"Do it again."

---

Coming Friday, August 5

#park jimin #park jimin fanfic #park jimin fluff #park jimin angst #park jimin smut #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin ff #jimin fluff #bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfction #bts fic #park jimin fic #park jimin x reader

[im-mariart]

The Gospel of The Bringer of Death | pjm (+18) synopsis:

Park Jimin is the star of the Seoul High volleyball team, handsome, intelligent, surrounded by friends and extremely loved in the community.

But what would they think of him if they found out who he really is? That the golden boy is nothing more than a character?

What would they do if they found out that Jimin's destiny is to bring doom to Earth?

…………………………………………….….................................

temporary synopsis and cover

inspired by set me free pt.2 and like crazy

jimin with imposter syndrome

all of bts, but jimin focused

cosmic horror apparition (Lovecraftian mythology)

jimin and oc

first published fic a/n: Hey how's it going? If you're reading this, know that this story was made with great care and a lot of late night work to write something that I thought was worthy of posting. I had some trouble with it since english isn't my first language, so feel free to correct me... Me and this story's Jimin share the trait that we push ourselves way too hard searching for some kind of perfection, so I decided to try to get out of my comfort zone and see what happens. And I'm still learning how to use Tumblr as a content creator (if you want to share any tips, i would be really glad :D)... To start our story, I recommend to read while listening to "Sharks" by Imagine Dragons, even the lyrics seem a bit like Jimin's paranoia, how he thinks others see him and so on… Anyway, see you down there :D

#1 The Beginning of the End - Prologue The voices in his head were too loud that night.

Evil and random whispers, not even the voices that lived in the boy's head knew him. He didn't even know himself.

Outside of his room, Park Jimin was the neighborhood's favorite. Always engaged with the school, the community and especially with the Seoul High volleyball golden team. There wasn't a place where his name was mentioned everyone wouldn't shower him with praise, be it for his angelic appearance, his talents in whatever his new hobby of the month was, his grades, his performance in Thursday's games…

Jimin really was the perfect golden boy. And he wanted his fame to stay that way…

But sometimes, in the middle of the night, when he couldn't sleep while tossing and turning in bed, he would sit in front of the large mirror in his room, looking at himself , his reflect and closest confidant, in a kind of telepathy between he and himself.

This was one of those nights.

Jimin couldn't get rid of the whispers. They had started in the middle of the volleyball match, his blurry vision and wobbly legs caused him to take a serve right in the face. He remembers a dark blur in the audience before falling to the ground in a daze. His teammates ran to support him and the coach asked for a pause on the game, but Park didn't give up, and after 5 minutes on the bench, he led his team to victory once again, suppressing his pain in face of public's celebration.

Each time he heard the whispers, it was as if a lascivious pain in his ear pricked his brain, for the first time he didn't stay for the celebration party with the boys and asked his parents to take him home, despite their insistence that Jimin went to the doctor. His stubbornness getting the best (or worse) of him, pushing the pain away with “It must be just stress, I didn't sleep well last night, I just need to rest”, which made his friends look at each other worriedly and start their speeches saying that they would always be there if he needed anything.

Jimin had really good friends. Or the persona Jimin created had really good friends.

His reflection looked back at him with an irritated expression, he almost ruined everything, what if he had really ruined it? What would become of him? Would they discover that the golden boy was nothing more than brass painted gold?

Jimin didn't know what irritated him more, the pain, the pressure, the poisonous whispers, or those whispers with his voice that his own mind had created.

He was never good enough.

Not for him.

He owed a lot to many people he loved.

And he couldn't be a third of what they deserved him to be.

Jimin said things like that to himself, receiving back the judgmental look from his own reflected eyes. Then Jimin started crying, hugging himself in the dark, creating a thousand and one scenarios in his anxious mind where it could and should be better.

Maybe it was the post-crying tiredness followed by sleep; but he didn't remember how he got back to bed, nor when the whispers stopped. -------------------------------------------------------------------- -You were awesome yesterday Jimin! Congratulations man! - Some brute hugged Jimin in the school hallway, delivering two friendly yet painful slaps to the back of the younger man who genuinely thought he had broken something.

-A-ah thanks man… thank you… you can take it easy… please… - That's what the smaller managed to mumble out with his excited fan's hug making his lungs lack of air.

-Hey…Take it easy Jae, yesterday was difficult for him. - Namjoon, his personal brute, spoke up to save his friend, pushing away the man's heavy hand, who walked away with an awkward laugh.

-Thanks Joon, I think it’s going to make a mark…

-Marks of victory my friend, of our victory! I think we must have broken some record… We are invincible! - Taehyung said, making the team laugh.

-Those victory marks hurt like hell… Seriously guys, I think if you look you'll see his fingerprint right here…

The group laughed at Jimin's drama. Yoongi was called his "savior" when he revealed his pharmacy arsenal to his friend, and in the second period, whatever Yoongi gave to Jimin, eased his pain and his mind.

It was almost in the last class when the whispers returned, with a unknown force that snatched Jimin from his chair straight to the floor, writhing in pain. The pain was so intense that he only remembered the screams of his friends and the teacher calling the school nurse, before he blacked out.

When he opened his eyes he was greeted by the white ceiling of the school infirmary, muffled voices in the background almost indistinguishable. He was in too much pain to listen, to think, to exist, but at least the sedation made the discomfort bearable.

It was when he heard a soft cry that Jimin became worried, gathering all the strength he had in his forearms to lift his torso and see what was happening. -Are you guys okay? What's wrong? - Jimin's low and weak voice filled the silent place for a few seconds. Until the crying gets louder.

-He woke up! - The tallest shouted, receiving a sharp and reprimanding “shh” from the nurse. The group of boys ran towards their newly awakened friend, the youngest with his face red and swollen from crying was holding his friend's hand, crying even more. One of them told Jungkook to stop being so dramatic, taking him off of Jimin who needed space to breathe.

-Kookie calm down, can someone tell me what happened? What am I doing here? Didn't we have a chemistry test?

-You don't remember anything? - Jin said worriedly.

-No. - Jimin looked at his friends confused.

-You passed out in the middle of the room and you were babbling some weird stuff, it sounded like you were having a seizure, and Kook took you on horseback running to the infirmary shouting help, he even took us out of the classroom. - Namjoon points to himself and the other 3 older in the group.

-Is everyone here because of me? - Jimin looked worriedly at his friends. - I-i'm sorry…

-No apologies little bro, it isn't your fault. - Hobi ruffled Jimin's hair in an affectionate gesture.

-And besides, you are my hero! Mr. Carlton was so scared that he said we can hand in the English assignment next week… and I haven't even started! - Yoongi showed two thumbs up with his hands with his typical evil genius smile.

-Oh, and don't worry Minie, Mrs. Lee locked herself in the teacher's room and has been praying until now. You even released us early, I love you man… - Tae holded Jimin's plump cheeks in both of his hands and gave an extra dramatic kiss to his friend's forehead.

And Jimin laughed. His friends laughed. It seemed like nothing happened, that everything was fine and it was just a feeling of discomfort after the game.

It was okay.

"Jimin, get out"

Not that okay, it seems.

"Jimin they will hurt you if they find out"

The whispers came back, quieter, but still audible in the boy's mind, who gave their friends his brightest smile, they were so worried about him, they really were like brothers. And in brotherhood, we tell each other everything, right?

“Jimin, they will leave you if they know who you are”

Maybe not today.

When he returned home with the school nurse's note, Jimin's parents insisted on taking him to the doctor, this time using force. The load of tests and exams didn't indicate anything really out of the normal, so it was confirmed as something psychological, Jimin returned home with a week's leave due to burnout and his parents crying to him to listen to them.

He felt like a nuisance to them.

During that week his parents didn't let him make any effort. Jimin ate, slept, played cards with his parents, watched TV and did a homework or two before his mother caught him and called him to do something else more fun. It seems perfect, right?

The lump in his throat ruined his recovering time. That feeling of "I shouldn't be doing this, I shouldn't deserve this, I need to do something, I need to be useful" was as present as the quiet whispers.

Until the night of the fifth day he heard a different whisper after winning an argument with his parents that he would at least take out the trash. As he was putting the trash away he heard it loud and clear:

"Follow me"

"What?"

"Come with me"

"I'm not going to follow a strange voice talking in my head" thought Jimin

"I'm not a strange voice, I'm your destiny"

Jimin was fed up, if the cause of these damn problems had a common source, he was going to take matters into his own hands. He took a empty glass bottle of wine from one of the trash bags and followed the direction of the voice to a small square with a playground, a few meters from his house. Jimin was small but athletic, he had enough agility to both attack and defend himself.

-Whoever is making this joke, better explain yourself soon, otherwise you'll eat glass!

He was angry, uttering threats loud enough for his mysterious “companion” to hear him, looking like a upset madman on the street in the middle of the night with an empty glass bottle in his hands.

Maybe it would have been better if he had sent whoever was pulling this prank to fuck themselves and gone back inside the house.

"Behind you"

Jimin jumped back and armed himself. A few meters away, a hooded figure with a dark aura was watching him, strangely familiar. The boy felt the blood in his veins run cold in contrast to his racing pulse, whatever that was indicated danger and Jimin was no longer so sure he wanted to take that risk.

-What do you want from me? Spit it out.

“I don’t want much from you Jimin, I just want you to be what you were always destined to be, just come with me…”

-Do you really expect me to disappear in the middle of the night with some hooded crazy guy? And how do you know my name? Or rather, who do you think you are to think you know me at this point? - The bottle held in his hands was shaking, his nervousness showing in his hands, but his gaze was as firm as ever.

“I know you better than you think, I know who you really are…” -I'm tired of this nonsense. - He walked with quick and aggressive steps towards the man, getting close enough to catch a glimpse of his face in the shadows being reflected in the base of the bottle aimed at his jaw. - So tell me who I am, idiot! Come on! Say it!

“You are our bringer of death Park Jimin.” a/n:

It was short but it was meant to give you a taste of this story, if you're interested, tell me what you thought of the beginning and if you're curious to see what the fuck is going on with our poor Jimin…

Bye :D

#park jimin fanfic #park jimin fanfiction #park jimin #bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #jimin x reader #jimin x you #bts x you #bts x reader #bts smut #jimin smut #bts angst #jimin angst #bts fluff #jimin fluff #jimin fanfic #bts x fem!reader #jeon jungkook #jung hoseok #kim namjoon #kim taehyung #kim seokjin #min yoongi #lovecraftian #cosmicism #kpop #jimin x oc #+18 or +adult only

[sweetcarrotsandroses97]

~Park Jimin Masterlist

~GOLDEN MEMBERSHIP

~KEY:

|❤️ = fluff |💙= angst |🖤= heavy angst |💛= comedy/crack |💚= au | 🤍= mature/heavy/sensitive themes|

~Series

coming soon...

~OneShots

coming soon...

~Drabbles

Impact Of The Heart (non! idol au, flatmates! au) 💚💙❤️ |3.5k words|

You and Jimin had been flatmates for a long time now. Your relationship consisted in soft quarrels and flirty comments, longing gazes and aching hearts. When you leave the flat after an argument, Jimin must find you in time and tell you how he feels before he fears its too late for words to change fate.

~Moodboards

coming soon

~Asks

coming soon

☕Caffeinate me so I can keep on writing! ☕

I do NOT give my consent for any of my works to be posted or translated into any other platforms or languages.

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