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#steven grant rogers imagine
anonymityisfunwriter · 3 months
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"Slut!"
Pairing - Steve Rogers x Stark!Reader Summary - It was perfect. Lovelorn and nobody knows. Love thorns all over this rose. You almost forgot just how hard the fall back to reality is. But if they call you a slut, it might be worth it for once.
Steve Rogers Masterlist | Inspired By Taylor Swift Masterlist
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"She goes through guys like a train-"
You immediately change the channel. The next one isn't better. You don't know why you thought it would be.
"The Stark last name and the long list of ex-lovers, that's her claim to fame. I mean, let's be honest here, she's a slu-" The tabloid reporter is abruptly cut off as the screen before you goes dark.
You look up to find Steve with the remote in his hand. He glares at the screen like the reporter was still talking, "You shouldn't be watching that."
"I'm used to it."
"You shouldn't be. It's despicable. They were - the things they're calling you-"
"A slut," you finish for him.
His eyes dart to you, that furrow between his eyebrows getting deeper and deeper with every word spoken, "It's not true. This isn't journalism, it's slander."
You weren't sure how this happened. Sure, it was only a matter of time before they found you out. This wasn't the first time. Not the second or the third either. If the press was to be believed, you were love sick. Love struck with a new man every week.
It wasn't the first time someone called you a slut. It certainly wouldn't be the last.
You stopped living your life in fear of what people would say a long time ago. Being this young was an art. And up until now, you thought you mastered it.
It was simple. You even had your rules. You followed them and no one got hurt - or at the very least, it minimized the damage.
They were going to stare at you. Strangers. Press. The flashing cameras. It came with being a Stark. If they're going to look, you gave them something to look at. You didn't so much as step out on the street with a single hair out of place. You were flawless. Always.
You were nineteen, and on the heels of a breakup with your second ever boyfriend, the first time someone spit that word at you - "slut!" It hurt, but it didn't hurt as much as you thought it would. It almost made you laugh. You realized that they didn't really care about your love life or about the trail of broken hearts you were supposedly leaving behind. They wanted a spectacle. They wanted a show. If you're going to be drunk, might as well be drunk in love.
It was easier after that. You knew the truth. The people around you knew the truth. You let everyone else believe what they wanted. You did what you wanted. You lived your life without worrying about being called a slut. They were going to call you one anyway. And if they call you a slut, you might as well make it worth it.
You gave just enough to keep them satisfied. Never anything too real. Never too much. Just enough that they wouldn't dare peak behind closed doors. Just enough to be able to live your life.
There were was a cost, of course. No one took you seriously. You dealt with the vague humiliation of the rumors constantly swirling about your hips and thighs and whispered sighs.
And though you inherited the Stark genius, no one cared about what you thought, what you had to say.
In that, the reporter was right, your love life was far more interesting than your thoughts on quantum mechanics or the military industrial complex. That was what you were known for.
For the most part, you were okay with it. You were willing to pay it all.
That was until you fell in love with Steve Rogers. Suddenly, you weren't willing to give them crumbs. You weren't willing to expose a love that felt this delicate.
You sit on the couch, huddled in your sweatpants, pensively staring at the blank screen.
This time, it was different. This wasn't a show, not a spectacle. It was real, an exposed nerve that the world decided was fair game. You were fair game and it was open season.
Steve settles beside you, draping an arm around your midsection. He kisses your temple, "Tony thinks it's probably best that you lay low for a while."
"Yes, well, my brother is the expert on PR damage control."
It wasn't the same though. You both knew it. Tony had done far worse with far more women. Yet, he would never pay the price you were paying in this very moment.
Steve's arms tighten around you like he's shielding you from the storm, "It's not right. It's not fair that you're being forced to sequester yourself. You're being punished but what exactly was your crime?"
"I fell in love with Steve Rogers, that was my crime." You fell for the man everyone wanted, the man who was in the wrong place at the right time.
"I'm sorry," he whispers against the crown of your head.
"For what?"
"You warned me this would happen."
It was true. You told him exactly what would happen, but even you didn't anticipate exactly how bad things would get.
You'd been with Steve for just under a year. And up until a week ago, only a select few knew. You both agreed to keep it a secret from the public. You felt protective over the love you shared, it was more real than anything else you'd ever had. You wanted to keep it to yourself, out of the hands of people that would tear you both to shreds without a second thought.
Steve felt the same. Though he was more worried about the enemies he made over the years.
It made sense to protect the relationship, to protect yourselves until you were both ready. You wanted to protect him from what you knew was lurking around the corner. Steve was still so new to the 21st century. Dating in the public eye wasn't easy. Dating a Stark wasn't easy. For almost an entire year, you used every publicity trick in the book - and it worked.
But then, you heard it, the whispers, rumors bubbled about your newest future ex-lover.
You only agreed to going public because everyone told you it was time, because they promised that the timing couldn't have worked out better than this. It was better to do this on your own terms than have it leaked.
No one knew how bad it would get.
"Are you sure? There's no going back after this," you whisper, standing in the hallway of your apartment. You could practically hear the cameras flashing outside your apartment. You'd never been this nervous to leave your apartment before. You'd been through the plan a million times. You'd be exposed to the cameras for a matter of seconds. Happy was already waiting with the door to your SUV open, ready for you to jump in. You'd walk outside holding Steve's hand - a sort of silent announcement to the world. "It won't be easy."
"I don't care," Steve promises, kissing the palm of your hand. "I'm tired of hiding. I'm proud to call you mine."
You tenderly stroke his cheek, "And if it blows up in your pretty face?"
He smiles down at you, "You're worth it."
"We'll pay the price, I guess." But deep down, you know. You'll pay the price, he won't.
The cameras had never been that loud before. Even though your announcement went off without a hitch, even though your publicist couldn't have been more pleased, not even they could have predicted how bad things would get.
It seemed like the whole world was calling you that four letter word.
At first, it was mostly online. People were mean, you knew that. You were prepared for nasty comments. Steve's most staunch supporters thought he could do better. People rejoiced in the spectacle your love life turned into. You were a laughing stock all over again. All that you were prepared for. Then some rabid fans leaked your phone number.
You decided that it would be a good time to disconnect anyway.
But it didn't end there. Not even close.
The day after you were expected to make an appearance for a charity you founded. It was just a quick 2 minute speech. And though the event had been throughly vetted, you'd never forget the way your blood ran cold when mid-sentence someone screamed that four letter word over and over again until security dragged them out. You continued until your speech was done, but there was no hiding the way your hands trembled.
From what you heard, the video was still making its rounds online.
You were expected to make an appearance two days after that. An event honoring your father. An event you poured your blood, sweat, and tears into to make sure it was impeccable, an event worthy of honoring your father. The same event you were practically uninvited from.
"Hello?"
"Hey, it's just me. I come in peace," Tony jokes.
"I'm glad," you sigh. "I was worried I was going to have to get another number."
Tony sighs into the phone, "How are you holding up?"
"I've been better."
"I'm afraid I don't come bearing good news."
"What now, Tony?"
"That event you had Friday night, the one for dad?"
You pinch the bridge of your nose. You already knew were this was going. "What about it?"
"They want me to take over for you."
You bitterly scoff, "This week just keeps getting better and better, doesn't it?"
"You say the word and I'll tell them to fuck off."
"No, don't do that. It's for dad."
"You planned this whole thing single-handedly. You deserve to be the one up there." You don't say a word. He's right, you both know it. It doesn't change the situation you've been put in. "You are still going, right? Come on, you have to go."
"They broke into my house, Tony."
"What? Are you okay?"
"Happy just told me," you explain, sparing Tony the most gory details. "The one in L.A. Apparently, it is now covered in spray paint. You wanna guess what they wrote?"
"Where was your security?" Tony demands.
"Here. Trying to keep people off my sidewalk."
"I'm so sorry."
"I just - I don't think it's a good idea. At least until I get more security."
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm glad you've got Steve there. At least I know he'll keep you safe."
You almost smile. Tony was never his biggest fan, but you mostly credit that to him being an overprotective big brother. And the situation you'd found yourself in did nothing to win Tony's over good graces, "It's not his fault, Tony."
"It kinda is, but I digress. Listen, we'll figure this out, alright? I'll go streak in front of the Tower if that'll take some heat off of you."
And though you effectively doubled your security in the last two days, nothing would change anyone's mind about you. You were the villain tainting their hero.
You broke down after that call, violently sobbing against Steve's shoulder. He just pulled you in even tighter.
It reminds you of why you're doing all this. So you can be together, out in the open. That in a world of boys, he's a gentleman.
You squeeze his hand, "You're worth it."
"I'm not worth having your reputation torn to shreds."
And maybe they're right about you. Maybe you do get love struck. Maybe his eyes are like the world's strongest liquor, and it went straight to your head. Maybe you do get love sick. Sure, your life has momentarily fallen apart. It's magic, madness, heaven, and sin, all rolled into one. But if they're going to call you a slut, it might be worth it for once. "But what if all I need is you?"
Steve Rogers Masterlist AnonymityIsFun Masterlist Inspired By Taylor Swift Masterlist
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frostironfudge · 1 year
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I Need You To Listen - Steve Rogers
Summary: For @the-slumberparty 's Week 3 Something New Challenge, I went with the medium mode - sex pollen but with exes to lovers. This took alot of work I ended up rewriting it entirely, I hope you enjoy!
Word Count: 7.4k || Dividers: @firefly-graphics
Pairing: Nomad!Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader
Warnings: 18+ minors dni, smut, angst, smut, fluff, sex pollen, p in v, fingering, dirty talk, love bites, steve rogers dirty talking (this man), swearing, nipple play, past is in italics, sort of a post civil war rewrite so we're going completely off canon
Main Masterlist || AO3
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Fate works in the most hilarious of ways, a stubbed toe over here and a broken heart still being nursed over there. 
Tony Stark stands in front of your cell, staring at you through the glass. You don’t hold back your tears from him. Disappointment colours his features. 
Broken pieces of trust lay scattered on the floor. The damage by him was done. Leaving you to bear the brunt. Leaving you to walk on the jagged edges of the broken family. 
A family that shared jokes, laughed, drank and protected each other. 
Won together. 
Lost together. 
In the past few days died together. 
“How are you holding up?” His arc reactor gleams as he takes a seat on the stool. Unzipping the jacket he wears his arm in a sling. You close your eyes, more tears fall at the memory of the fight. An involuntary shiver as the chiling bite of the cold manifests itself from your memory. 
The cell isn’t uncomfortable. There is a cot in the corner, the bathroom has a door. The sterile scent of the cleaning agent stopped giving you a headache hours ago. 
“Why are you asking me?” You look at him, he should be mad, he should yell, call you a traitor. 
“Contrary to what you all think and did to me, I trust you.” He shrugs, left eye twitching, he rolls his shoulder. 
“How is the arm?” Your gaze falls to it. 
“Seen better days. You know, heart troubles.” He looks at Wanda’s cell, “Kid, Vis is asking about you.” 
She looks up at him, “Is Rhodes alright?” 
Tony presses his lips into a thin line, shaking his head. 
Wanda looks down at her hands. 
“He tore us apart. That Baron Zemo. I know you have a lot to learn, alot to grieve. The accords may be dissolved. I’m working on it. At SI we’re  preparing the bail documents.” He informs you all. 
Sam scoffs, “What about Cap and Barnes?” 
“James is in recovery as per my last conversation with T’Challa. Where Cap and Nat are I do not know nor does he.” Tony gazes back at you. 
“I trusted him.” Is all you can say to him. You stare at your palms, you couldn’t get the blood off. 
“I know, I did too.” 
“Tony.” Your lips quiver another sob at the heartbreak Steve left you with to deal. All alone. 
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Bucky fights Tony, you don’t want to see your best friend hurt. The man who took you under his wing when you joined in, your steps halted by the blonde haired man who harbours your heart. 
“Sign the accords.” Steve orders, you gape at him. 
“Steve, do you fucking realise? We’re here because I didn’t sign them because I am siding with you?” You almost yell. The tempreture drops as the snow cascades into the facility from the now broken windows. 
Bucky lands on the floor, a pained groan, his arm blasted off. He kneels, eyes widened at the implication. At the man he hurt irreparablely being the one to take away one of the curses HYDRA bestowed upon him. 
“Shit!” Your eyes move to Tony, slowly he rises from the floor. The suit broken in several places. 
“Y/N, you need to listen. You cannot go rogue with me.” 
“Steve,” You push his arm away you had to intervene. 
“It was good while it lasted.” He says and everything turns to static. 
“Wh-what?” 
“Look, I, we had a good run but I know your stance on the accords you’re just with me for the sole reason we’re together.” Steve says to you. 
“Are you serious right now?” Anger courses through you, your grip on your pistol tightens. 
“It's not even the accords. I, I didn’t think we would make it beyond this month. Look, I have to think about Bucky. Its all of this, it doesn’t, priorities.” He lunges over to defend Bucky leaving you defenceless. Your ears ringing, you watch as they fight, you can’t hear any of the clangs the groans. 
You stand there dumbfounded. 
As Steve throws Tony down the beam reflects off of his shield and hits you on the shoulder you’re thrown against the wall. Bucky meets your eyes, at least he seems apologetic.  
Tony tries to get up to help you, “Rogers, she’s hurt—,” The shield slams against the arc reactor. 
“I don’t care.” He says so easily.
You pant as the pain increases, both the burn and sting of his words as well as the physical injuries manifesting across you. 
Steve helps Bucky up, you try to push yourself to your knees, crawling to Tony while keeping your arm close to your body. 
Bucky looks back at you, his eyes convey his remorse. Tony breathes hard, you blink back tears at the glance Steve doesn’t spare towards you. 
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Eight months down the drain.
The morning kisses, cuddles, the random sketches of you he left as gifts all lose their importance. Remembrance only causes pain. 
“Mr. Stark, you need to leave.” 
Tony sighs, “I’ll visit, or I’ll have you guys out before that. Work some arrangement.” 
“I’m so sorry, Tony.” You look at his arm and back at his face. 
He gives you one of those sad smiles of his, the one where he pretends it's just another day, another common thing. 
“Aren’t you foolish to trust us again?” Sam questions him as Tony passes by his cell. 
“I just have to do my job. It’s the people who have to trust us.” Tony turns to face Sam. 
“So the people trust the missile maker millionaire Stark?” Sam knows the jab is stinging, Tony hated 
that about the company’s past. 
The rift was ever present, your friend looks towards you. 
“Y/N, let him know not to insult me, I’m a billionaire.” He grabs his glasses and moves away. 
You resist the urge to laugh, everyone would resort to their coping mechanisms. You’d have to bide your time here. Usually getting black out drunk was how you solved your own problems. 
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True to his word Tony has you all released on various conditions. You, Scott and Wanda are released together. 
When you reach the tower it isn’t surprising that there was a break in, you’d scoff that Steve didn’t come to break you out but he made his decision in Siberia. 
The faint scent of his cologne lingers in your room. Hints of Patchouli and Bergamot. You stare at the box on your bed. 
Opening it reveals a burner phone. 
“I got a burner too, one number loaded upon it.” Tony stands at the door holding a glass of scotch for himself and your favourite Vodka in a bottle. 
“Surprised he bothered.” You open the phone and it chimes an unread text upon it. 
“I didn’t get that.” He observes, you take the bottle from him. 
Opening the text. 
SGR: I want to talk to you. Please let me explain. 
You laugh bitterly, unscrewing the cap and taking a long sip. At least you can blame these tears on the alcohol. 
“Are you going to? Call him I mean.” Tony settles on your desk chair. 
“Nope.” You set your bottle down after three more sips, grabbing the edges of the opened flip phone you press. The phone snaps from its hinges and you place it back down in the box, “Did you track it?” 
“Fake return address.” He twirls the ice in his drink. 
The two of you bask in the silence. Drinking in tandem and out of sync. 
“Were you going to sign the Accords?” You ask after a while staring at the setting sun. 
“Nope,” He reaches for your bottle, pouring himself a peg, “I was having them redrafted. Steve only had to agree for them to shut up. My draft would have gotten approved.” 
“So confident.” You raise your brows. 
“Comes with the job title.” He rolls his eyes. 
“Do you think anyone will trust anyone?” You tap the bottle neck. 
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Steve’s laughter reverberates against your chest. He reaches up to cup your face. 
“Why is it so amusing?” You ask, not meeting his eyes. 
“Because it is, Poppet. I wouldn’t break your heart.” He assures yet again. 
You gnaw at your bottom lip trust was difficult to come by for you. 
“You want to know why?” He whispers, making you meet his gaze. His nose brushing against your own. 
“Because I have your heart and it's what is keeping me alive.” 
You lean closer, pressing your lips to his, Steve kisses you back. Hands pulling you closer. You feel his smile between the kisses and you begin to retract knowing what he was upto but it’s too late. 
Steve tickles your sides and laughter blubbers from your chest. He grins, cheeks flushed as you press against him. The thin sheet hides nothing from the way you feel. 
“I love you.” He says, you stroke his cheek with your thumb.
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“I loved him with everything in me.” You blubber out, tears falling down. 
Tony sits next to you, your head rests on his good shoulder, ��I know you did. It's a hard road ahead, kid. Not an undoable one.” 
“I hate him.” You declare, “I hate him, he just, how could he be so selfish?” 
“Sometimes we all are, he is in the wrong. He didn’t exactly reciprocate the trust.” Tony sighs, you look up at him. 
“I’m sorry about your parents.” You watch him give you those sad smiles, he flexes and extends the fingers of his left hand. 
“He could have told me, I trusted him enough that he could.” He whispers then shakes his head. 
“Steve Rogers is an asshole.” You declare raising your bottle to his assholery. Then you giggle. 
“You just thought of the word assholery didn’t you?” Tony giggles as well. 
Both of you burst out laughing. 
“Hey Tone?” You ask mid laughter. 
“Yeah?”
“Thank you for being here, also can I get a box?”
“Sure.” He stands, FRIDAY has the box led by one of his tinkered bots to the room. 
“I need to check on Rhodey.” He says, “I’m a call away okay?” 
You nod, he leaves. The box stays on your bed and then you stare at the sketches hung around your room. With a delicateness that Steve didn’t spare towards you, you pack up the papers. Sealing the box with plastic wrap and head down to the safety deposit lockers. 
Your steps are misjudged and you drop your box of trinkets several times. The stupid ceramic mug from that couples pottery class probably shattered. 
You giggle thinking how it resembles your heart. 
Locking the box leaves you in silence. Your room is void of all things Steve except the one shirt he gave you on your first mission together where the two of you fell into the muddled waters that left the two of you in need to change out of clothes. 
The shirt smells like him, you curl up with it on your pillow. 
“This is the last time you gave your heart away.” You tell yourself. 
“This is the last time you cry over him.” You promise yourself. 
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Eight months pass and you all sit in the conference room. The accords are abolished. They reinstate Natasha, Sharon, James, Sam and him. Tony holds his flip phone. Resorting to texting rather than speaking to him. 
A reply comes when you all are back at the tower. They’d be there tomorrow. Rooms are prepared with favourite foods stocked up. You had requested your room be shifted away to another level. 
Heart ache didn’t manifest beyond those few nights. 
Your walls that Steve Rogers broke down were built back stronger. Impenetrable. His shirt was placed in his room by you a month into getting over him. 
You don’t pass by the floor, you’re a level above. Thankfully the elevators divide the levels they service and you won’t ever be on the same floor as him. 
The night is restless despite your indifference to all of them. They were the family you chose and yet you were abandoned by them. 
Dreams are but a loop of memories you have buried. 
After your morning laps you head to Tony’s lab. 
“They will be dropping in at SHIELD first. Fury wants to discuss some things and then they come back here.” He stifles a yawn. 
“You need caffeine my friend.” You hold up the coffees, “Luckily I come bearing gifts.”
“I love you.” He whispers gingerly while taking the cup. 
“Are you talking to the coffee or me?” You ask, taking a sip of your own. 
“I can love both.” He defends, whispering to the coffee he loves it more. 
You throw one of his discarded paper balls on him. It doesn’t phase him. 
“Are you sure you want to come along?” He asks for the umpteenth time on the drive to SHIELD. 
“Tony, I will leave you behind if you ask me again.” You glare at him. 
“I think you will be fine.” Vision assures a gentle smile on his face and he laces his fingers with Wanda. She smiles at him, her own mind filled with thoughts. 
“See we’ll be okay.” You declare. 
Minutes later you’re seated on one side of the conference room. Tony on the first seat, you on the second. Vision opts to stand behind Wanda as she sits. 
Fury sits at the head of the table. The door opens and Natasha, Sam and Steve step into the room. A thick silence settles over. You look at each of them and then back at Fury. 
Natasha’s hair is shorter and blond, Sam seems to have gotten leaner. Steve was sporting a beard and longer hair. 
You wondered if the post break up look was something you should have gone for, maybe dyed your hair blue.
“Well, as you know you all have been reinstated. The Avengers operate without any Accords binding them but they must be mindful of their poweress and the possible damage they may cause. A country has full discretion to forbid the Avengers from subduing threats that may lead them there and you must honour that no matter the cost.” Fury gazes at you all. 
“What if they need help?” Steve questions, you scoff. 
Cold blues flash to you. You roll your eyes. 
“The dissolution of the Accords was done keeping this one rule in mind. I suggest you make peace with it. You will not be able to save everyone from damage and hurt, it is better than causing it.” Tony adds. 
Steve’s jaw tightens. He nods. 
“Now since this is done and dusted. Official missions may resume.” Fury places down a manila folder. 
“Official?” Sam questions, raising a brow. 
“Agent Y/L/N here was liasoning with us for recon purposes. Kept under wraps. We have identified HYRA bases. Once the plans are sanctioned you all will be back on duty.” Nick sighs, “I suggest you all train together to get a sense of your skill sets and moves again.” 
No one nods. 
Nick shakes his head leaving the room. 
“Your old rooms have been cleaned at the tower. Access is via FRIDAY, food is stocked. Layout’s almost the same. Few changes here and there. Oh and there are new succulents in the living room.” Tony fiddles with the folder. 
“We can conduct a meeting about these missions tonight or tomorrow. You all settle in, there is a car outside and your vehicles are in pristine condition at the garage.” He informs them further. 
“No welcome back party?” Nat muses, you laugh. 
“I drank all the liquor so unfortunately no parties.” You deadpan. 
Nat and Sam stare at you. 
“It has been a difficult few months. I understand everyone will take time to return to a semblance of previous normalcy.” Vision’s words are both reassuring but also farfetched. 
Wanda grasps his hand and gives it a squeeze. 
Steve’s brows furrow in worry. He observes you trying to find any hints but you give him none. You learned to school yourself. An agent well versed in hiding her intent, emotions and aim. Your skillset is what brought you to the team and it is what you have. It's what you could trust. 
Sam nods, “Well best we head back.” 
“Yes we could use some sleep.” Natasha says, you flash her a smile. 
“Yep, well I have a few things to discuss with Fury.” You push away from the table first. Tony follows your lead. 
“Should you not include us in the conversation?” Steve says in his authoritative baritone. 
“Unfortunately, Captain, it isn’t an Avengers matter but a personal one. Which you aren’t entitled to know.” You spit back. 
His mouth opens again to speak. 
Tony beats him to it, “Where’s our Manchurian candidate?” 
“Bucky’s in the UK for a bit, after Wakanda we were there for a while. He stayed back for personal reasons.” Steve explains and you slip out. 
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Steve stares at your room door, knocking on it yet again. Two weeks since his return and you had avoided him in every capacity.
He had worked up the courage to knock on your door today. But there was no response as it was over the past fifteen minutes. He requests FRIDAY to check in and all the AI says is that you’re fine.
You had gotten back from a mission yesterday morning. You had to have been resting. 
“Why won’t she open her door then?” He mutters, pressing his forehead to your door, “Poppet, I just want to speak to you. Please.”
“Captain.” Vision greets floating out of Wanda’s room.
“Vision.” He acknowledges.
“Why are you knocking on an empty room’s door?” Vision tilts his head. 
Steve blinks at him, “This is Y/N’s room.” he states as if obvious.
“It isn’t, she switched rooms about three months ago.” Vision says
Before Steve can ask anything further, Wanda opens her door, “Vis.” She gestures with her hand for him to return.
“Wanda.” He walks to her this time.
“FRIDAY, where is Y/N’s new room?” Steve questions walking to the elevators. 
“She’s on the twenty-fifth floor.” The AI responds, he switches to the other elevator. 
“Captain, you will have to go to the ground floor to switch elevators.” FRIDAY informs him. 
Steve sighs moving back in front of the original elevator. It stops at every single floor; he almost misses the elevator as you’re getting on, luckily a Stark Industries employee holds the door for him. 
You bite the inside of your cheek. Looking away. 
“I want to talk.” He says over the all too silent but crowded elevator. 
Everyone looks at him except you. They follow his gaze to you. 
“I don’t.” You answer while staring at the numbers. 
“Poppet.” He says and you shoot him a glare before looking away again. 
People trickle in and out. 
Steve’s gaze is trained upon you. He nods politely at those greeting him but his gaze nerver strays from you. 
You look into your phone pulling up a forgotten game loaded into the device. Anything. Any stupid thing to avoid him. 
Finally it's just the two of you. 
The automated air freshener hisses filling the space with the scent of lavender. 
“Poppet I just want to explain—,” Steve steps closer, his hand outstretched. 
“No. I don’t fucking want to hear a word.” You seethe, you move forward pressing the button to your floor if it makes you reach quicker. 
“Poppet.” He grabs your hand, turning you towards him. 
“Y/N. Use my damn name.” You spit out, finally meeting his eyes. 
There is a tick in his jaw, he nods, “Y/N. Just five minutes. I know I don’t deserve it—,”
“You don’t deserve to even ask for a minute of my time. You never saw us work beyond that month correct? Well guess what? We don’t.” You push at his chest, he doesn’t budge. 
“I lied. I said those things so you wouldn’t follow. I could not have you living rogue with me.” Steve admits, you stare at him. 
“You lied?” You repeat. 
“I didn’t want to break things off but that was the only way I could ensure you wouldn’t follow behind me. It was dangerous. Poppet—Y/N,” he corrects, “I told you your heart kept me alive, I love you—,” 
Steve’s head snaps to the side, cheek turning red at the impact of your slap. You breathe hard, eyes tearing up. 
“That was not for you to fucking decide, you do not get to come back here and make your sorry excuses for being a horrible human being. Betraying my trust. Leaving me and your friend injured. You picked Bucky over us. You picked Bucky over me and I understand I would pick him too if I were you. But I would not fucking lie or leave my girlfriend and best friend behind injured horribly. You’re welcome back to the compound Steve. Even back to your glorious Captain America title. However,” 
The doors open to your floor, you step out. 
“I don’t know how you say you’re alive because I took my fucking heart back from your undeserving self. I don’t care if you lied, I don’t care if it was all fun and games. I don't care about you. I don’t want to care about you. You are a teammate because I am forced to consider you one. I don’t need to listen to you to provide you closure or a second chance. You fucking liar!” 
“Poppet,” Steve reaches for you again, you take off running to your door. 
“FRIDAY, deny access. Override only with Tony.” You order, the locks on your doors bolt and Steve keeps knocking and pleading. 
He sinks to his knees outside your door apologising over and over. 
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Natasha is pinned to the floor by Wanda as the latter grins triumphantly. Natasha praises her and they break apart. You take Wanda’s place and Sam takes Natasha’s place. 
Mixed training was now mandatory. 
You had almost burned Nick Fury with your glare. Steve hadn’t shown up to any, in fact he hardly was in the same room as you. 
Sam goes full offence, you block the blows. Defending yourself you had worked hard over the time away from official duties. 
Minutes pass by, neither of you yields. Panting you stare at Sam waiting for an opening to take him down. 
“Come on, that's all you got, little spy?” Sam teases, you laugh. 
“You wish birdy.” You stick your tongue out childishly. Wanda and Nat laugh. 
“Come on Wilson.” Nat prompts, “We’re bored here.” 
“Alright,” Sam moves, pulling a fake. You catch it a moment too late, as he’s about to tackle you to the ground you turn. Tugging on his arm as Sam’s eyes widen. 
The momentum thrown off both of you land on your sides, recovering swiftly he’s pinned to the ground by you. 
You grin at him. 
“How's that birdy?” You laugh at his irritation. Sam rolls his eyes. 
“Y/N.” 
Everyone’s heads snap to the door, Steve and Tony stand there. 
You help Sam up. Sam keeps an arm around your shoulder. Steve’s eyes linger and his fists clench. 
Sam takes his arm away. 
You roll your eyes, they land on Tony as he bites his cheek, oh this can’t be good you deem. 
“Wheels up in an hour for Rogers and you.” He delivers the news. 
“Sam, Nat, Vis and Wanda are needed to take on a bigger base with Tony.” Steve looks at you, “Fury’s orders before you try to whine your way out if it.” 
You glare at him, “Alright.” 
An hour later you’re on the jet with Steve. He doesn’t talk. The last conversation between the two of you was enough. 
“We won’t be splitting up.” Steve informs you. You nod, studying the layout. 
You frown in recognition. 
“I was here on recon. This is supposed to be a dead base.” You look up at him. 
“Fury said they detected activity.” He looks back ahead. 
“Hopefully it's just random people looking for shelter.” You look back at the plans. 
Steve hums, observing you again. Wishing it would be like before where the two of you would be holding hands. 
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Cobwebs litter the walls, plaster cracked. The scent of something decaying permeates through the space. 
Walking into the HYDRA base is carefully crafted, Steve leads with his shield. You keep a double check on the back trail. Something was not sitting right with you. 
The hallway diverges, you stand next to Steve, “Left side first then we can go right.” You whisper. 
He nods, “Stay close, I don’t know why something feels wrong.”
You don’t verbalise your own feelings, following in his footsteps. 
The hallway leads to an abandoned lab, the computers torn down and broken apart. Steve relaxes his defensive stance looking around the area. 
You move carefully through the edge of the room, “Something should be of value here.” 
“I don’t think there is anything.” Steve declares, “Let's clear the other pathway.”
You give another once over and then follow him back down the path. 
Your boot catches on the uneven flooring, “Shit!” You whisper yell as you fall forward. 
Steve turns, breaking your fall. You land against his chest and his arm encircles your waist. For a moment that echoes a broken promise of eternity he holds you close to him. 
Steve sneaks a moment he lost over a stupid decision. He takes what crumbs he’s given by fate. 
Your palm is against his chest, your head tucked against the crook of his neck. 
Why can't you move away?
Why do you want more of him? 
Why do you miss him? 
He hurt you. 
He lied. 
He hurt you. 
You break the eternity Steve was living as you pull away, silence stretches between the two of you as you head down the other hallway. 
It's empty yet again, you shake your head at the waste of time. Steve steps closer to the vials on the shelf. The liquid in them gleams a certain way. 
You hear a pneumatic hiss from your left. You turn quietly making your way to the wall. 
Steve studies the shelf again. There was no dust on it. No pattern on it. These were fresh vials. Then his eyes widened, “Y/N don’t!” 
You turn to face him when the hiss is louder and the slits of the vent open. A dust like substance pours over floating around you. 
A coughing fit grips you, you place your hand against the wall to steady yourself the gun falls as you clutch your chest wheezing. 
Steve pads over to you, trying to rub your back to ease the coughing fit. He asks FRIDAY to scan the micro dust to see if it is anything dangerous. 
The coughing fit subsides over a few minutes, your breathing shallow. You look up at Steve blinking away the tears. He cups your cheek.
“Are you okay? Do you feel anything?” He questions, gaze running over every aspect of you. Glove clad large palms moving over your form. You nod, but then your stomach cramps. 
“What is it?” Steve takes not of your discomfort. 
“I, it's my stomach—,” Your words are cut off by a whimper as the cramp gains severity. You lean more against the wall as the cramp travels across. 
Steve rummages through his mind to know what this substance could be, he had been to HYDRA bases before. He spoke to Bucky all about them, their experiments which he knew. 
He watches as your skin flushes, you squirm in his grasp. He steps closer to support you. 
“Poppet?” Steve makes you look up at him, your eyes have a dazed look almost glazed over. You feel his warmth through your tactical suit. His thigh between your legs and the ache the needy ache is all you know and you need to get rid of it. 
“Please,” You plead to him gazing at his slightly blurred blue eyes, your hips moving out of their own accord against his thigh you moan as your core makes contact with him. 
Steve pushes your hips away, “Poppet what—,” 
“Steve, it hurts so badly. Please,” You cry out wiggling against his hold. His fingers dig into your hips to keep you in place. 
Your palms cover his, you look up at him. 
You lean up, he shifts back. You use the distraction to guide his palm to grind down on it. Your choked moan has his cock harden further. He can’t help but watch as you use him. 
Logic hits him then when he feels just how wet you’ve gotten, before he can pull away there is a prick in the side of his neck. You begin to blur from his view. 
“Poppet, something is wrong.” 
You look up at him, why did his words sound garbled? 
Why was he falling to his knees? 
You look behind him, people standing and watching. 
The need clouding your mind clears in the slightest, “Steve,” you kneel next to him. 
“It’s okay,” he assures you, reaching for the shield. 
The cramp hits you again harder; you cry out in pain, doubling over and sinking against the wall to curl up. 
“FRIDAY, dis-distress signal.” Steve orders as his vision begins to blacken, he reaches for you with the last of his strength covering your curled up form with his body. 
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Steve keeps his eyes closed. 
Enhanced hearing picking up the dripping pipes from the left. To his right he hears your pained whimpers. 
How long was he out?
Chains bind his arms above him, the uneven concrete digs into his knees and shins. He would search for the shield in the aftermath. 
He counts four people by their rhythmic footfall. They were in the same facility. It couldn’t have been easy to move them. 
Lolling his head to right he watches you through hooded eyes, chained like him kept on your knees but you’re struggling. Squirming on the ground trying to find respite and crying out of frustration. 
“Sex pollen.” Bucky spoke, with a shake of his head in disgust.
“Sex pollen?” Steve repeated as if to confirm. 
Bucky gives him a look, Steve’s eyebrows shot up higher. 
“What does that do? Did they use it on you?” Steve questioned his best friend. 
Bucky shook his head, “It basically sets the libido up to the maximum, forces the person in contact to orgasm but basically they need to have sex, self pleasure seldom works. The intensity is higher to combat the inevitable effect.” 
A dark expression crossed Bucky’s features, he sighed sadly. Looking out at the view from his home in Wakanda. The house, though borrowed, was Bucky’s own. 
Steve had placed a few sketches of Brooklyn around. The place he used to consider home now changed. Steve stares at the more recent sketch of his home city. 
Two men out of time in a place decades ahead of the world outside. 
“How long?” Steve clutches his charcoal tighter as he forms the curve of soft lips on the paper. A stray tendril of hair. 
Bucky looks down at the half done sketch of your face. His heart aches for Steve and you. 
“Two hours, it gets progressively maddening. At first one can try to speak or answer what is asked. After that it is variable how long it takes for the need to become the sole focus. If nothing is done in two hours then its too far gone and well...” 
He had limited time, he could not gamble any further. Steve opens his eyes, tugging at the restraints to catch the attention of the captors. 
You hear the rattling, you look up at Steve another pang through your core. 
“Steve—,” 
“Ah, Captain. Welcome to the land of the waking, you were out for just under an hour. Now who is this sweet little needy thing with you?” The man asks, stepping closer to you. 
Steve growls, “Stay away from her.” he warns. 
The man raises his hands in defence, “She’s a little needy Captain,” he walks back toward Steve away from you, “Why so possessive?” 
Steve bites his tongue, “She’s mine.” he grits out. 
“I see and why is she yours?” 
He can’t tell them, they would exploit you but his will is crumbling swiftly and his mind is compelling him to speak, “I love her.” 
“Hm, it seems she needs you, Captain.” The man grins, walking back to you. His palm touches your scalp as he pulls your hair back. You want to recoil but the touch is soothing some of the ache. You look at Steve, pleading.  
“I could fill in.” He says suggestively.
You try to shuffle away but the grip on your hair tightens. 
“Don’t you fucking dare touch her!” Steve bellows as his thumb approaches your lips, “What the fuck do you want?” He pulls against the restraints, almost snarling. 
“I want to know where my Soldat is, tell me.” The man demands, leaving you. The words register as does the scent of cigarettes you recoil. You feel your mind working again, clearing the need to be fucked. 
“Steve don’t,” you warn him, he couldn’t sell out Bucky whatever this was, it wasn't worth ruining his life again, “I’ll deal with this…” you bite back the pained whimper. 
Steve stares at you, eyes wide and with an emotion you can’t place. 
“Oh but you know what is wrong with her don’t you Captain?” The man demands and you look to Steve, “Tell her the truth that burns your veins, Captain.” 
Steve wants to lie, wants to cushion you, “Truth serum?” He looks at the man who nods.
“Brilliant isn’t it? You’re compelled to tell me whether or not she chooses to be saved. You’re on a time limit.” The man taps his watch. 
“It’s a sex pollen.” Steve informs you, you stare at him. 
“That, that's why I need?” Your insides churn and your clit pulses as you watch Steve lick his dry lips before he continues to speak. The small insignificant action has your body wanting to be devoured. 
“Yes, and if you don’t get release, it’s fatal.” 
Silence stretches on the footfall of the three others has stopped, they watch the show play out. The consequences and the outcomes weighed. 
“Fight it, don’t tell them. It's not worth it.” You whisper. 
“Poppet you cannot say that. I am not risking your life!” Steve yells, pulling at the restraints again. 
“You can’t have him at risk again!” 
“I won’t let you die!” 
“You already left me for the dead once! You chose him once. Just fucking do it again!” You seethe, your skin clammy and you just want this suit gone. The material irritates you. 
Steve gapes at you, “I, I didn’t—,”
“Save it.” 
“As much as I enjoy a lover’s quarrel. Where is Soldat?” The man interrupts. 
“Gone.” Steve answers, “Poppet, please,” 
“Don’t fucking tell them!” You demand, “Consider it my last wish! Fight the damn truth serum.” 
“You are not dying.” Steve grits out. 
“Where is he, where is Bucky Barnes?” The man lands a punch to Steve’s face. His hair falls forward, slowly Steve looks up at the man. Rage colouring all his features. 
“I will let you help her. Just tell me where Bucky is, Captain.” The man promises. Steve considers, you begin to yell no at him. 
“He’s in the United Kingdom.” 
“Are you insane?!” You slump to the ground, “Do you have any fucking idea what have you done?” 
The man walks over and slaps you, “Shut the fuck up! You want a cock so fucking bad you fucking bitch in heat, I’ll give you one!” 
Steve snarls, wrapping the chain around his own palm and tugging hard until it breaks away from the wall. The man turns, gun cocked and ready, it's grabbed out of his hand by Steve. He looks at the man dead in his eyes before delivering the fatal shot.
You look up at Steve, as the man drops to the floor between the two of you. 
Steve watches the other three scramble about, he quickly fires the shots, he keeps one person alive. 
He grabs the other chain, yanking it with all his strength. It gives way. 
“Where is the shield?” He walks over to the man on the ground, pleading in pain. 
A shaking hand rises, pointing to the vault. 
“Access code?” Steve picks him up and takes him to the keypad. 
The man enters it crying when Steve presses on the open wound, “Don’t fucking pull any stunts.” 
You watch as the doors part and the shield stays there as a momento. 
You blink when everything goes out of focus. You blink again. Heat spreads over your body goosebumps raise across. 
Your thighs clench and you squirm trying to get some friction to release the ache. Tugging at the restraints is maddening. They don’t relent when you try to manoeuvre but no position provides any respite and you sob out as the frustration grows. 
“Poppet.” A warm voice calls out, you whimper. The hold on your right arm loosens and your hand reaches for the tactical suit. You had to get it off. You needed to get it off. 
You blink and watch as Steve’s hand stops yours, you push at him. 
“Please,” you whimper as another cramp takes over. 
“You smell so sweet baby.” He groans, the sound urges you on, you guide his hand to where you need him. 
His warm palm cups you the fabric of your suit soaked Steve hears your sigh of relief. 
“Going to take care of you Poppet, but you need to hold on for me okay?” Steve assures, breaking out your left arm as well. 
“Steve please,” you beg again, your mind screaming at your body, your hips move making you grind onto his palm. Your smaller palm wrapped around his wrist not letting him pull away. 
“Fuck,” He groans, pushing you against the corner and undoing your suit’s zipper, you don’t face him palms braced against the wall. Steve’s warm calloused palm is as though cold respite to your heated skin. 
He doesn’t waste time, fingers running over your folds, palm pressing against your clit. Your head tilts back resting against his shoulder, mouth parted moans leaving you. 
Steve presses his fingers into you, two thick digits and your walls clench around him he almost wishes he’d fuck you right there. 
“Fuck this pussy remembers who she belongs to doesn’t she?” Fingers curve finding the spot he very well could have placed. Stars line your vision as he hits the spot over and over, fingers curving.
“Right there Steve!” You cry out your ass rocking against him, pressing onto his cock. He keeps his thrusts hard and fast, palm rubbing your clit in the most delicious of ways. His grunts fill your senses.
Pleasure thrums from his touch to your body, your back arching as his fingers drive deeper and deeper into you. Your walls are gripping them back in not wanting him to stop. 
“I know sweet Poppet. I know what makes her weep for me. I’m going to taste you. But first you’re going to make a mess on my hand alright?” He instructs filthy words offset by the sweet kisses placed against your forehead and cheek. 
His other hand cups your breast playing with your nipple. Your hands fall from the wall, gripping onto his nails leaving indents on his skin. Steve watches your chest constrict, your voice choke off, eyes rolling back as your orgasm crashes into you. 
His fingers keep moving, riding your orgasm out, your walls quivering around him the sensitivity of your clit as it pulses. Some of the haze clears but the need just returns tenfold.
“Steve, please, I can’t, can’t wait—,” 
His lips are on yours, cutting you off, your suit pushed down further without breaking away from the kiss.
The shield clatters to the floor, his suit haphazardly discarded. Steve’s hands explore your body, remembering the planes he explored before. The love he whispered across your skin. Marking you with his touch, his lips, his seed.
“Wanna see you,” You want to turn, he grabs your hands pinning them to the wall. 
“No one gets to see you this way but me.” He growls, you feel his hard cock move between your thighs. His larger body covers yours, shielding you, watching over you. 
When your thighs clench around him,  Steve hisses, “Going to fill you up, sweet girl.” he coos. 
Inch by inch Steve’s length stretches you, your back arches. The relief the stretch of his cock brings is unlike anything else you’ve felt before. 
“You can take it, made for my cock aren't you?” He stills inside you, throbbing as your walls clench around him. He moans biting down on your shoulder the feel of you decadent, unable to be given justice by his mind.
“Heaven. Pussy feels so good, baby. Missed you so much.” He grunts, you push back against him needing him to move, “hands around my neck.” He orders, leaving your hands.
You wrap them around him, holding onto his now longer hair, soft between your fingers. Your mind remains you of the soft moments when he laid in your lap and your fingers combed through these locks.
Steve pulls you out of your thoughts with the snap of his hips. His palms gripping your waist anchoring you to him. Skin slapping against skin, his cock feels so good you could sob, the need turns into embers, your thirst being quenched. 
Each delicious, deep stroke moves you towards sweet bliss. You hear your name in an echo of his name. Steve watches the wall you mould against him, as countless times before. Your heart may have put up walls but your body left no space.
The way he sees the telltale signs of your orgasm he brings his right hand towards your apex, timing his rough circles on your clit to his thrusts. The sensations blooming become too much, your body alit with flames of pleasure, Steve moans as your walls begin to milk him just as your orgasm shatters through you.
He keeps his thrusts going, pumping into you. The arousal that spills onto your thighs, the mix of you and him. 
“One more.” He demands, fingers coated with the mix of the two of you, his marked fingers brought back to your clit, you cry out in ecstasy. 
The blissful haze clears, everything returning to you. The mission, the power, you can’t, you can’t, Steve, Steve, Steve, Steve–,
“Right here my sweet poppet, you will give me one more. You know I'm greedy.” He reasons, only increasing his pace, you thrash in his hold. Lips find the sweet spot of your neck.
It’s your undoing, you cum around him yet again. Crying out his name, tugging on his hair. Aftershocks moving through you. He holds you up, pressing kisses to your forehead, temple, cheek, jaw and shoulders. 
Grounding you, palms moving over you after he brings his coated fingers to taste them. Your head lols against his shoulder, you reach for his jaw, placing a soft kiss. Steve smiles at the familiar gesture. 
Helping you get dressed he follows as well. You’re lifted into his arms and carried to the quinjet.
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As it had turned out Bucky wasn’t in UK it was a precautionary measure they came up with to secure Bucky from any life threatening attempts. The guilt you had harboured lessened.
Steve had stayed away from you, once Tony and Bruce cleared you of any remnant pollen he took his leave. Avoiding you as he had after the elevator confrontation. It left a bitter taste in your mouth. 
As much as you felt as if you were an emotional fool for considering the thought of wanting to approach him, you missed him. Terribly. 
You knew your walls were useless against the one man who you had given your jagged heart to, the blue eyes you had drowned yourself in multiple times. Whether it was when he found your gaze across the room or when you were pressed against him.
Your feet carried you after three days to his door. Your hand shook when you knocked. Thoughts swirling through your mind insecurities gaining fleet. 
The door opens, Steve’s eyes widen then his brows furrowed with worry, then fall to the still fading love bite that  he placed on your collarbone. You shift your weight to either side. Hands fiddling with the hem of your top.
You look down at your feet, Steve’s palm cups your cheek. 
Your eyes meet their old home of blue.
“I want to listen.” You manage to say, his pink lips stretch into a familiar smile.
He steps to the side inviting you further into his room.
-x-x-x-x-
3K notes · View notes
xcaptain-winterx · 1 year
Note
Requests are open you say? How about Steve Rogers having a huge crush on the new recruit (reader) and being very awkward in trying to pursue her
Be a man
Steve Rogers x reader
summary: above
warnings: fluff, awkwardness, shy Steve, cum
a/n: English is not my first language, meaning you will probably find a lot of misspelling etc.
Part 2
Main Masterlist Steve Rogers Masterlist
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Steven Grant Rogers also known as the hero Captain America. Fought against Hydra and their leader Red Skull, his brainwashed best friend, Ultron, his own team and even Thanos. You would think that Americas golden boy is unstoppable, that nothing can stop him.
You’re wrong.
See, Steve has years of experience in fighting due to the fact that he’s over a hundred years old and fought in World War Two. The only thing he doesn’t know about, or to be more specific, doesn’t have any experience with, is the opposite sex. Steve has never been on a date or had a real first kiss. Ok, yeah, he kissed Peggy and Natasha once, but that meant nothing. God, he’s still a virgin.
To sum it up, Steve is an awkward bean around women. He doesn’t always show it obviously, but ask him something not work related with a flirty smile, and he starts to sweats like a polar bear in the desert.
Steve always thought that he was going to be able to talk to ‘the girl’ once he saw her, that he will have no problem to communicate with her.
He thought wrong.
Steve is in the training room, punching the punching bag until it falls off again. He was supposed to be training with Sam, but he hasn’t shown up. So far, Sam always showed up or at least texted him if something came in between and he couldn’t make it. Steve stops hitting the punching bag and goes over to the bench where his phone is laying. He picks it up and swipes it open, seeing that he didn’t receive any text message from Sam.
It’s not normal for Sam to be late, so Steve decides that he’s going to look for Sam. He puts his phone in his pocket and walks out of the gym, in the direction of the living area.
As he walks down the hallway Bucky crosses his path, “Hey pal, have you seen Sam”, Steve asks.
“No, but I can imagine he’s talking to the new recruits, telling them something about teamwork makes the dream work, or some other shit”, Bucky says, mimicking Sam’s voice.
Steve’s brows furrow; what new recruits? Steve heard nothing about new recruits. “I don’t know anything about new recruits?”
“Transferred from a SHIELD base in Germany, I think. Sam will probably force us to introduce us to them”, Bucky says. Steve knows that it’s hard for Bucky to talk or communicate with new and many people at once, but he knows that he’s trying his best. Since he began going to therapy, his old self made more and more of an appearance, and Bucky feels a lot better in general even though it’s hard sometimes. He’s proud of Bucky. He’s trying his best.
“Better we do it now than later. Come on, Buck”, Steve says, patting his shoulder, and pulling him with him.
Bucky lets out a chuckle, “Ok”.
Both super soldiers walk towards the meeting rooms, thinking they might be there when Bucky suddenly stops walking. Steve looks at Bucky, silently questioning why he stopped. Bucky reads Steve’s facial expression before pointing towards the end of the hallway, “found him”.
Steve follows Buckys finger and sees Sam. Sam is not alone, he’s with a woman. A beautiful woman. A goddess.
Bucky sees Steve’s face heating up. “You good, pal?” he asks with a teasing voice. Steve doesn’t answer him, to lost in the woman’s beauty next to Sam. Bucky snaps his fingers in front of Steve’s face, trying to get him back to reality, but it doesn’t work.
Lost in thoughts, or to be more specific the woman, Steve doesn’t see how Sam noticed them too, and is calling them over.
“Steve!”
Steve comes back to reality when Sam calls him for the third time. Bucky laughs at Steve’s confused puppy stare, looking like he just woke up from a coma without any knowledge of what happened before. It gets worse as they see how Sam and the woman are now walking towards them. Bucky feels Steve panicking next to him. “Hey Steve, calm down, ok?” Bucky whispers to him.
“Mhm”, Steve answers, not being able to form any words. Sam and the Woman getting closer and closer to them.
“Remember, we just introduce ourselves” Bucky tries to calm him down, his own anxiety leaving and instead focusing on helping his friend, “You can do this. Just remember to think and talk at the same time, and don’t just stare at her”. If his friend wasn’t looking like a dead fish Bucky would’ve really enjoyed this moment. Him helping his friend talk to a woman like he did back in the 40s, but nothing about Steve’s current problem is funny. Well, maybe the fact that he for real looks like a dead fish.
“Ok” Steve says.
“Ok”
“Ok”
“You can do this, Steve”
“Ok”
And the woman gets closer and closer.
Steve begins to murmur what he wants to say, making Bucky look nervously at him.
The woman and Sam are now almost completely by them as Steve suddenly says, “I need to finish the mission report”, before sprinting the other direction.
“Hey, why did Steve-“ Sam can’t finish because Bucky is already sprinting after Steve, leaving him and the woman utterly confused. “BUCKY!”
Sam puts his hands on his hips, “normally they are not like this, ok? They probably just remembered to take their anti-aging cream”. He turns to you, “Super soldiers, you know”.
You smile as Sam claps your shoulders and says, “how about I show you the training room?”. You nod, letting him lead you to the training room.
Meanwhile, Steve is sprinting towards his room, looking like a gazelle who’s running away from a predator. Steve thought he could talk to her, but no.
Once he reaches his room, he locks the door, and then just stands there, staring at the locked door; what just happened? He begins to hyperventilate like how his pre serum self did when he had an asthma attack. The room feels like it’s shrinking. Steve feels small and scared. Just the sight of the woman made him with a snap of a finger feel like his weak 40s self before the serum. Back when no one liked him.
While Steve is having a panic attack, Bucky is running towards Steve’s room. Bucky started running after him some seconds after he sprinted away, and normally Bucky would’ve caught up to him, but Steve’s panic and the super soldier serum made it a bit difficult. Luckily, Bucky knows Steve like no one else and knows that he’s hiding in his room.
“Steve?” Bucky asks, knocking on the door. “You good, pal? Can I come in?”. He waits, but no answer comes, so he tries opening the door but it’s locked.
Bucky sighs, “Steve, let me in”.
On the other side, Steve is debating if he should let his best friend in. His debating goes too long for Bucky though because the next thing Steve hears is Bucky saying ‘Friday unlock the door’, and the door opens.
Bucky walks in, seeing a teared eyed Steve who’s breathing fast and heavy. Bucky strikes over to him and pulls him slowly down to the floor, sitting face to face with each other. He takes his hand and puts it on his heart, “Steve, hey. Focus on me. Focus on my heartbeat. You feel mine?” Bucky says, putting his other hand on Steve’s heart, feeling how his heart is still beating fast. “Steve, focus on my heartbeat”.
Steve looks at his friend and tries to focus on his heart. He closes his eyes, only trying to listen to Bucky’s heartbeat. “Yeah, I feel it”.
Bucky gives him a smile, “ok, good”.
They sit in silent for a few minutes, Steve’s heart beating now slower and his breaths coming out normally.
Bucky waits until Steve’s heartbeat is fully back to normal before asking “better?”.
Steve nods, “I didn’t think we would have had to use that method on me”, he says chuckling.
This calming method showed Bucky’s therapist, Steve. She told him that it would help Bucky calm down when he’s having a panic attack, and it did in fact help. The night after she explained it to him, Bucky woke up from a nightmare and started to panic. Steve’s room is right next to him, so he heard his friend’s panic. He tried the method that night and it worked perfectly. It took some while until Bucky calmed down, but it was way faster than without the method, and Bucky was able to fall asleep again after.
To other people, this method may look a bit weird, but it calms his best friend down, so who cares? It’s also no surprise that Steve is the only one allowed to do this method. Sam once tried it and Bucky punched him in his face when he put his hand on his chest. Sam left the room angrily and annoyed with a broken bloody nose. Bucky punched him with his metal arm. He thought Sam was in danger that second and in a state of danger he uses his metal arm. Bucky apologized to Sam though, and he truly felt bad and sorry. Sam instantly forgave him though, he knows it wasn’t his intention.
At least not in that situation.
Bucky even ‘baked’ Sam some brownies. Well, more like bought some Brownies and said he baked them. Sam knew he didn’t, but said nothing and just enjoyed eating some good, tasteless brownies with a smile on his face.
“Well, we didn’t think you would ever run away from a girl”.
Steve sighs, “Yeah. Back then, they would run away from me. Now it’s me running away”
“Why did you?”
Steve shakes his head. “I don’t know. I got scared I guess?”.
When Steve looks at Bucky again, he comes to face with a blank stare. It kinda reminds him of Bucky’s winter soldier stare. If they weren’t having an emotional and serious conversation, Steve would’ve been actually concerned that something happened that made Bucky go into Winter Soldier mindset.
Bucky scares Steve when he suddenly jumps up, “You know what” he pulls Steve up, almost making him fall over “You will have that girl”.
“Huh?” he asks, confused.
“Or just someone”.
He doesn’t like the thought of Bucky helping him. Bucky was a true player back then, a gentleman, but a player.
“I help you talk to women. I can do that. I did that a hundred years ago” he stops when he realizes “fucking hell, that’s a long time ago”.
Steve scowls, “Language, Buck”.
“Sorry”.
“I get that you’re trying to help me, and I appreciate that” Steve takes a deep breath before continuing, “but I can’t”
“Why?” Bucky asks crossing his arms, standing like an angry parent.
“I just can’t, ok? Also, colleges are not allowed to be in a romantic relationship”.
“Then look for someone else. There’s this woman named Leah. She works at my favorite sushi place and I heard-“
“I don’t want someone else!”
Bucky raises an eyebrow, a teasing grin on his face. “Ohhhh, so you want her. Ok, Steven. I see you”. He winks at Steve as he groans.
“I didn’t say that. I just-ugh, I like her, but-there’s not gonna be anything between us” he tries to give his best friend a reassuring smile, but knowingly fails. “You can ask Leah out”, Steve tries changing the topic.
“No, she’s not my type”.
Bucky knows that Steve won’t stop having a crush on the new recruit. It took Steve a hundred years to get over Peggy. He was still in love with her even after being unfrozen. Now imagine he’s thinking about the new recruit until he dies. Bucky doesn’t want that. God, he was honestly happy when Peggy passed. That woman was like a snake slithering her way into his friends heart only to poison it. He didn’t like her from the second she interrupted Steve and his conversation. Dumb Bitch.
He wants his friend to be happy. He wants to be an uncle. He hopes Steve will get himself together and talk to her.
“Ok. Whatever you say”, Bucky says, patting him on his shoulder. They continue talking, but this time about what movie they are going to watch for their ‘we need to learn about cinematic history’ movie night. While talking, Bucky’s mind continues to wander back to their original conversation, and about the fact that Steve doesn’t want some dating teaching from him. In all honesty, he’s slightly hurt by that.
He could still help him somehow, though.
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It’s been a week now since he saw the new recruit and he’s been trying to avoid any situation that could lead to him seeing her. Steve knows it sounds silly, but he’s scared of her. Scared of seeing her. Scared of her seeing him. He hasn’t been training for a week. Steve knows the chances are high that she will be there. The only sort of trying he did this week was going for a run. Alone.
Sam noticed a change in Steve. Everybody did. Steve was never a huge extrovert and now he’s such an introvert. He doesn’t even eat with them anymore because she could be there, or just walk past them eating.
Today he needs to be brave, though. Bucky asked him to train together because he’s the only good match for him. Bucky told him that winning against Sam slowly starts to get boring, and that Steve needs to train again. Cardio is good, but Steve needs to do more.
After trying to convince Bucky that they can also train outside or anywhere else than the training room, he knew from Bucky’s reaction that it’s not gonna happen. So now he’s on his way to meet Bucky in the training room.
To say Steve is nervous is an understatement, he’s almost shitting his pants.
Bucky assured him they would have the room for themselves and Steve just hopes that that’s true.
Steve walks into the gym and surprisingly sees no one. No Bucky. Steve was already late because he was nervous, so it confuses him why Bucky isn’t here. He looks at the clock on the wall and sees that he’s sixteen minutes late, meaning Bucky is to late too.
“Maybe he’s still asleep”, Steve tells himself. Technically, he would be happy that Bucky is able to sleep, but it’s the first time since a week that he’s training and last time, Sam already didn’t come.
He is just about to go to Bucky’s room when he hears a soft voice.
“Well, it’s only seven in the morning”.
Steve turns around and freezes.
It’s the woman
Oh, no no no no no
“Every normal person would be asleep at this time”.
Steve is unable to speak, he’s just staring at her. Not even blinking, just staring.
She looks at him with a smile, waiting for an answer, or just something.
When Steve realizes that she’s waiting for an answer, he clears his throat. “Yeah, uhm-I uh, I mean he likes to sleep-uh- he can’t sleep that much and-uhm yeah. He normally only uhm-sleeps with me- Wait not like that-uh I mean, he just likes to sleep with me-no. He uhm, he sleeps better with-me-uhm because I’m a good sleep partner- no, I just-uhm. IM NOT GAY”.
Steve looks at her with wide eyes. He knows he just made a fool of himself, so he tries to save himself.
Tries.
“There’s obviously nothing wrong with liking-uhm men, but I’m not like that. Yeah, uhm I hate men- wait not hate men, I like them, but platonic like ha ha. I like woman. But I’m not a relationship-I uhm”, he doesn’t want to look like he is desperate for a relationship. She could think that he’s trying to ‘hit on her’. He believes that what it’s called, but you can never trust Tony. “I’m not into relationship- uhm, the romantic, uh, kind-just the other kind”
Now she looks at him with wide eyes. The only other non-relationship kind she can think of is the sexual one. She can’t believe that Captain Rogers, the golden boy, is such a man. The worst part is that Steve doesn’t understand what he just said and instead looks at her with a nervous smile. Poor boy thought it sounded more like normal relationship, platonic kind. It didn’t, though.
“You do you, I guess” she says, feeling incredibly uncomfortable. She didn’t think her first time meeting Captain America would be like this.
Steve sees that she’s not comfortable or at least confused by what he’s saying. Maybe she doesn’t like his answer.
So he continues to try to fix this conversation.
“I uhm I would like a relationship-with someone-uh I want to-“ he can’t say dancing, that sounds boring. He needs to come up with something that everyone does these days. Something that she would probably like “do Netflix and chill”.
Steve needs to get better at telling when he can trust Tony and when not.
“Oh, uhm” she doesn’t know what to say “that’s nice I guess”.
Right now, Steve would rather fight against HYDRA than talk to her. He can feel how he’s sweating. And if that already isn’t bad enough, he starts to really look at her. Oh boy.
She’s wearing tight black leggings with a matching black sport bra. She must’ve been already training for a while because he sees some drops of sweat on her chest area, running to her cleavage. Steve is directly looking at her cleavage, not taking his eyes off it.
He doesn’t notice that he’s looking at it, well, that he’s so obviously looking at it.
She puts her left hand on her right shoulder, acting like she’s massaging it, and not like she’s trying to cover her chest.
Steve’s eyes move to hers, and it only takes three seconds until realization hits him.
“Shit!” he screams, making her jump “oh, I’m sorry I didn’t want to scare you-I uhm, and I didn’t want to stare at your you know-chest. Not because they are not pretty, they are-NO Uhmmm, they uh. It’s just”.
Steve stops talking when the door opens and Bucky walks in with a smile on his face “Language, Steve. Good morning you two”. At least someone is having one.
“Morning”, she says, smiling at his best friend before walking away to lift some weight. Deep down they are both happy that Bucky saved them from the awkward situation, though, Steve is also sad because he wanted to talk to her, to have a chance, but he failed.
Bucky smiles after her, then turns to Steve. “Hey Steve, how are you?”
“You knew, didn’t you” Steve almost spats, his voice echoing throughout the training room. He turns around and sees how she is looking at them.
He quickly turns back around, facing Bucky, who just gives him an innocent smile. “What do you mean Steve?”. Bucky knows that Steve can’t say anything about that, due to the fact that she can hear everything they are saying.
Steve glares at him, grinding his teeth. “That you would be late”, he lies.
“Yeah”.
Steve wants to scream, but he can’t “why didn’t you tell me?” he asks, his veins showing.
“I texted you, Punk”, Bucky says as he walks over to get a punching bag.
Steve frowns; Bucky didn’t text him. He pulls out his phone.
Love❤️‍🔥- I’ll be a bit late
Send one minute ago
Steve cringes as he sees the name Tony and Sam saved Bucky on his phone. He would rather want Punk with that heart. Platonic style. He doesn’t know how to change it, though.
“Didn’t you see my message?” Bucky gives him a fake questioning expression. A teasing one.
“I must have missed it”, Steve says in a monotone voice “I mean it says you send it a minute ago. Bucky”.
“Oh, you know. The signal is quite bad here”
Steve closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “Yeah, Bucky. You would’ve thought that Tony would’ve already handled it”.
Bucky snickers “Yeah”.
“Yeah”.
Bucky walks with the bag over his shoulder towards a hook to hang the bag on. He turns to look at Steve, a grin on his face when his eyes move to look behind Steve.
“Hey, how about you help her, Steve~”, Bucky says loudly.
Steve follows his eyes and sees how the recruit is struggling with moving some weights out of her way, so she can put the bench there to do some bench presses.
She looks at them and gives them a shy smile. “That would be kinda nice”.
Steve looks back at Bucky, panic in his eyes. Bucky gives him a big smile that says ‘yes’.
It’s time, it’s time to shine, Steve. He can do that, he can easily lift that.
‘Ok, Steve. Pull your ass cheeks together and help her’ he thinks to himself as he walks towards her. He stops in front of her, getting lost in her eyes for a second. This time he snaps back quickly though and moves the weights away.
“Thank you, Captain Rogers”, she says, his back still towards her.
“Mhm” he can’t bring out a single word. Instead of turning back to her, he sorts the weights, so she doesn’t see him blushing. “You-You’re welcome”.
He hears her getting on the bench and takes that as his cue to leave.
“Hey, Steve!”
Please, don’t Bucky.
“You should help her. Stay behind her to make sure that her arms don’t give in”
Steve doesn’t turn around this time. He can hear how she doesn’t lift any weight, meaning she is looking at them.
“Yeah, I uhm would, but- mission reports. I need to finish the mission report”, Steve lies “important stuff you know. Not like helping her isn’t important, but yeah. Avenger stuff is important….”.
It’s that second that Bucky realizes that Steve is the worst person in admitting his crush he ever met. The best friend he is, he needs to help him. “Oh, I already did them for you”.
Great, now Steve’s lie is a lie. Thank you, Bucky.
“No, I don’t think you did”, he tries to save himself “They were on my desk this morning, unfinished”
Good job, Steve.
“I did them this morning. We were on the same mission, Steve. Only one of us needs to do them” Bucky says, punching the bag “I send you a message”.
“No, you didn’t-“ he looks at his phone to see a message from Bucky.
Love❤️‍🔥-already did the mission report.
Send a minute ago.
Bucky knows Steve like the back of his hand. He knew what excuses he would use to try to flee the scene. A laugh almost leaves his mouth as he sees the face Steve is making. God, he missed teasing him.
“I thought you were asleep”.
“No, I wanted to finish it. You’ve been quite stressed the past week, and I wanted to lift some weight of your shoulders”.
“Thanks, James”.
The tension between them is noticeable. So noticeable that the recruit is more uncomfortable than when she was alone with Steve.
She gets their attention when she walks past them to grab her water bottle. “Have fun training”
“You already leaving?” Steve asks disappointed, sad that she’s leaving.
“Yeah, I’ve already been training before you both came. Also, I need to find Sam. He promised to show me the rest of the compound. I only saw half of the facility so far and don’t want to get lost at some point”, she says. So far she didn’t get lost because the most important areas were already introduced to her, but it’s better to know the whole compound. “Bye” she waves them before opening the door and walking through it.
No one says anything until the door closes. Bucky is the first to break the silence, “wow”.
“I know you did that on purpose!”
“I was trying to make you talk to her” he grabs his shoulder “I just want to help you. She’s a beautiful woman-“
“Hey!”
“See” Bucky says, “you’re jealous when I just say that she’s pretty. You have a crush on that girl, Steve”.
Steve sighs in defeat. “Ok, maybe”.
“I KNEW IT” Bucky screams, jumping like a little kid on Christmas morning “FUCK YES, STEVE”
“Language”
He stops jumping and looks at him. “You will get that girl. I promise” Bucky looks like he’s about to cry “oh my god, you’re all grown up”.
Steve lets out a slight laugh. It’s almost ridiculous how happy Bucky is that there’s a girl that he kinda likes. It reminds him of how they talked about their futures when they were little. They talked about carriers and family, and how they will be called uncle Steve and uncle Bucky by their best friends kids.
“Are you crying?” he asks, seeing Bucky wipe his eye.
“Pfff, no”.
Oh, he’s definitely crying.
“Calm down, Bucky. Just because I like her doesn’t mean that she likes me”.
“Yeah, because you’re just an Avenger, the symbol of America, a super soldier, owner of America’s ass-“
“Ok, I get it”. Steve isn’t dumb, he knows that people know him, that he’s quite famous; god he sounds like Tony. All this doesn’t make him the most liked person in the world, though, and not everyone fall for him. Not just because he has blond hair and some women like dark hair, or he is to old schooled and doesn’t know every new show on Netflix, or women are not into him because they hate male genitals and prefer women’s….parts. The shield only shows what he shows the world and not the people he cares about. He doesn’t show his emotional side with all his flaws.
“You like her, right” Bucky asks, knowing the answer.
“Yes, of course, but-“
“Then you will go to her and tell her that”. Bucky claps his hands. “You will tell her how much you like her. You will take her dancing and to the movies. Understand?”
“Yes, Sargent” Steve smiles.
“I know she’s the one. You will propose to her at sunset and give me some nephews and nieces”. Steve laughs at Bucky’s hyper fixation about his crush. Both of them are acting like two teenage girls.
“A uncle to Steve Jr’s and….uhm…what’s her name again”
“……”
“………..”
“……………”
“………you don’t know her name?”
“no, not really”. Well, that’s awkward.
“Oh my god, Steve”, Bucky is regretting his decision to help his friend “how about we start with you introducing yourself?”
“Bucky, please don’t do anything stupid”, Steve pleads. He doesn’t want Bucky to give him to much pressure. The thought of Bucky trapping them in a closet scares him, or him basically throwing him against her.
Bucky just looks at him confused. “You will do something stupid. I’m here to prevent that from happening”.
“Promise?”
“Promise” Bucky says showing Steve his hands “I swear on Sam’s life”.
Steve smile slowly falls and Bucky corrects himself “ok, I swear on uhm, your life”.
“I guess that’s ok”
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Since then Bucky’s been on the mission ‘get a sister-in-law’, with no luck though. He thought being a wingman would be easier, but it’s not. Definitely not. Or he has just a bad person that he needs to help.
So far Steve had like four times eye contact, spoke two sentences in two conversations. The one sentence only being two words.
The best try so far was when Steve was in the kitchen, reading the newspaper, when she came and asked him if he could move a bit so she can get to the fridge, and Steve said ‘yes’. He said something, made eye contact, didn’t walk away and didn’t stutter. He didn’t even sweat! Steve did this on his own without him and for that he needs an applause.
And the worst try was when he was ‘forced’ to train with her.
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“You can do this Steve”, Bucky whispers to Steve before giving him a pat on the shoulder and pushing him towards the mat.
Steve still hasn’t introduced himself yet, so Bucky thought it would be a good opportunity to see the skills of the new recruits and to train with them. Surprisingly, Steve is now sparring against his crush, the woman they still don’t know the name of.
Steve walks on the mat, giving a quick look over his shoulder to see Bucky giving him a thumbs up.
He takes a deep breath before saying, “Ok, come at me”.
To say he’s impressed is an understatement. He’s fascinated by her skills, by the way she moves with such grace. Instead of directly coming at him and trying to punch him, she moves around him. She does that the whole time, dodging every single move of him while he tries to land a hit on her, well, more like pinch her. He wouldn’t hurt her. Ever.
At some point Steve finally manages to get a hold of her, but she is quicker and kicks his one leg away and then uses his arms to lift her up and wrap her legs around his neck, bringing him down. Steve is now on the mat with her legs around his neck, her directly hovering over his face. Steve doesn’t know why, but he’s not complaining about this position.
He gets himself back together and uses his legs to his lower back of the mat and makes a roll, so now she’s on the mat, with him in between her legs.
Steve can be lucky that most of the recruits are already doing their own thing because this is not a professional normal work position. Sam, who just walked in, stopped next to Bucky when he sees the scene. He looks at Bucky and sees how he’s directly looking at where Steve’s face is.
“Stop doing your creepy eye thing”, Sam tells him, but Bucky simply ignores him. Sam is about to say something when he hears a loud slam, and sees her on top of Steve, straddling his hips “oh”.
This scene doesn’t last long though because Steve flips them around, now straddling her hips and pinning her arms above her head. She tries to move around under him, successfully. Her back towards and is about to use her knees to make him fall off. Steve thinks quicker though and flips them again. Her back against his chest and his back against the floor. He wraps his legs around each of her legs, making her unable to move them, while he wraps his arms around her neck, taking her in a headlock. She tries to wiggle away, but can’t.
She taps his arm, signaling him that he won. Steve lets her go, softly lifting her arm to help her up, and then getting up after her.
“Everything ok?” he asks, wanting to make sure that he didn’t hurt her in some kind. That would definitely make admitting his feelings harder.
“Yes”, she smiles at him, panting slightly, “thank you, Captain Rogers, for training with me”. The smile she gives him is a true, generous smile. Steve doesn’t see how Sam and Bucky are exchanging scared looks.
“Y-You don’t need to tank me”, Steve says. Now it’s the time to introduce himself; he can do it. He takes a deep breath before continuing. “And you can call me S-“
He gets pulled away by Bucky, forcefully getting pushed against his chest. Steve looks Bucky confused into his eyes as Bucky pulls him with him behind the corner, out of sight of her, with Sam walking next to them. All the way to behind the corner Bucky keeps Steve against him, while Sam blogs other from seeing Steve’s side.
“What are you doing? I was just about to introduce myself”
Sam looks at him with wide eyes. “Yeah, something else was also about to introduce himself” and points to Steve’s crotch.
Steve looks down and sees what Sam is talking about.
For the first time, the golden boy is having a boner. A huge one. The serum really did make everything bigger.
“Oh, no no no no” Steve goes.
“Hey, it’s ok” Bucky tries calming him down “it’s uhm normal”
“Yeah, you know how many boners I had in my life”, Sam continues.
“See, even Sam thinks so. Did you ever notice how often I had when we were out with some girls, or just when I was thinking about one”, Bucky continues, Sam nodding his head the whole time. Both giving Steve a smirk. “You have them everywhere. In the shower, during work, in bed, I even had them when we had a sleepover”.
“Oh my god” Steve hates talking about that. He doesn’t know what’s worst, talking about women things or about men and their boners. “I had it in front of her, in front of everyone” he cries out.
Sam pats his shoulder. “No one saw it”
“You did!”.
“Because we watched both of you”, Sam assures him. “The others did their own thing, and she looked in your eyes, man. Not what’s below Captain America’s waist”
“Maybe she felt it though”, Bucky says.
“Bucky!”
“Your not helping, man”, Sam shrugs and looks down “ok, maybe she did because you know, it’s not small”
“See, Wilson! You agree”
Steve had never been this embarrassed in his entire life. He covers his erection with his hands, but it only makes it more obvious. He’s trying to cover his boner while his two best friends are talking about his penis size and how often they get a boner. He wants to dig himself a grave.
“Guys!” Steve whisper screams, getting their attention back. “I need to get rid of it”.
“Of your giant boner?”
“Yeas, Sam. What else is there to get rid of?” Steve says. Bucky slaps Sam on the back of his head, with no context at all. “What was that for, Bucky?”
He shrugs “I know you would like to do that, but are too nice to actually do it”. Steve just wanted to have a nice day where he maybe finally managed to speak to the woman of his dreams, but no, everything had to go like shit. “What do I do?”.
Sam and Bucky look at each other before letting out an obvious loud breath of air. They turn to Steve. “Well, you could try to calm down” Sam says, and Bucky continues “or you could, you know, help yourself out”.
“No!” Steve doesn’t even want to imagine helping himself out. The simple thought disgusts him and he feels an incredible feeling of shame.
Steve shakes his head at them. “Tell me something, that helps uhm, the problem”.
“Remember when your mom caught us looking through her drawers and spanked you”.
“….”
“….”
“….”
“Are you getting harder?” Sam asks, looking at his now slightly bigger boner.
“N-no” Steve pushes with all might on his boner to get it down “s-say something else”. He begs his friends for help.
Bucky looks hopeless “I don’t know what to say to get her off of your mind”. Steve wants to say something when Sam holds up his hands.
“Hold up, her off of your mind” he says looking at Steve, “so it wasn’t just because you got a bit close to her”. The smirk on his face is huge, a teasing one.
Steve groans out of frustration and pain.
“You know, I could see you together”, Sam goes, giving him a thump up.
“I know, but he’s too afraid to ask her. He couldn’t even introduce himself”.
“You didn’t introduce yourself to y/n?”
Steve looks at him and repeats her name softly. Y/n. Your name sound like an angel, a page out of the Bible that you worship and say as a pray. He would do that. Say your name like it’s a holy prayer. He wants to say your name again again and again. Whispering your name in your ear as you slowly share a kiss.
“Shit” Bucky says. He thought that Steve’s boner couldn’t get any bigger, but he was wrong. So wrong. It’s now almost twice as big as before. “Sam, why did you say that?!”
“I didn’t know this was going to happen! I just said her name. I didn’t think he would get hard because of a name”.
“Well, he did!”
They hear people coming into the training room. A lot by the sound of their talking. At least fifteen entered the room. Now you add them three, plus y/n and plus the seven recruits that were already in here. That makes twenty-six people. Two, Sam and Bucky, already saw Steve’s boner.
“Guys!” Steve screams “what do I do?!”, hiding more in the corner.
“Obviously getting her out of your head doesn’t work”.
“How about you stay in front of me while I walk out”.
Both shake their head “they would see you though and stare at you. Also, there are too many. You wouldn’t make it out unnoticed”.
“What if I wait until they leave”.
“Steve, they will eventually walk to this corner when they get more weights, and then see you”
Steve looks hopeless. “Bring me some pants that- I don’t know, doesn’t show my you know”.
“Steve…nothing can hide that boner”, Sam says “there is only one option”.
“What?”
“you could…help yourself out, Steve”
“No”
“Steve, please”
“No”
“Pal, listen-“
“No, Bucky. I can’t do that. I can’t just touch my…member…and..bring myself pleasure”, Steve hates talking about it. “How am I even suppose to do it?!”
“You take your dick in your hand and hold it tight, then you start to move your hand up and down. Personally, I would advise you to do it fast but-“
“I meant where!” he covers his ears trying to forget what Bucky just said. Though he learned something new. “I can’t just do it here, it would..spill”
Sam looks around until he sees something that could help “take this to collect your sperms”. He shows Steve an empty probably by someone forgotten water bottle.
“But-“ Steve knows that this is the only way and that he should accept it, but he doesn’t want to “fine”.
“I wait around the corner so no one walks over here, while Bucky makes sure you don’t get a heart attack” Sam says, winking before walking around the corner. Bucky gives Steve a slight smile before turning around. He doesn’t need to see his best friend Masturbate.
Surprisingly, Steve isn’t that loud. Sam only heard him once or twice a bit louder. One time he was screaming Bucky’s name because he turned around for a second.
Sam walks over to them when Bucky gives him a thump up. Steve is sitting on the floor, panting heavenly. Next to him, a completely full to the top water bottle. Or more like cum bottle.
“Congratulations on your first orgasm, Steve”
They are on their way out now, happy that Steve doesn’t have a big gun in his pants anymore.
“Hey, Sam”
Fuck
“Hey, Y/n” Sam smiles, while Steve panics. He’s drenched in sweat and is holding a bottle of his own cum.
You smile at Bucky and Steve too. You look at Steve and see how he looks like he’s in pain and completely drenched. “Are you ok, Captain Rogers?”.
Bucky and Sam quickly cover him up. “Oh yeah, he’s fine, he just-“
“Is hungry!”
“Uhm yeah and you know how you can get sick when you didn’t eat”
“Yeah ya get really sick”
You stare at them for a second, trying to process what they said. “Oh, maybe you should drink your shake then, Captain Rogers”, and point to his ‘shake’, and give him a smile.
“I-“
Bucky stops Steve. “Yeah no, he will just get something from the kitchen, you know?”.
“Bucky’s right, uhm I don’t think that would be such a smart idea to drink the shake. Hah ha” Steve says awkwardly.
Your smile falls. “Oh, yeah sure. I just thought that would help. We don’t want you passing out”.
Was his answer mean, is what Steve thinks. He doesn’t want you to think he just didn’t drink the ‘shake’ because you said that. Steves heart pains as he sees your reaction; you looked so sad. It obviously isn’t that big of a deal. Surely you forget about it later, but what if you don’t? You don’t forget that he didn’t want to drink the ‘shake’. What if you think you’re dumb for asking that? He thinks for a second, a long second, a second that will change everything.
“You’re right”, and opens the cap.
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heaven4lostgirls · 9 months
Text
Never Enough (S.R)
pairing: steve rogers x reader
warning: angst, allusion to breakup, Steve chooses Sharon over reader.
summary: Steve leaves you, thinking you’ll wait for him.
word count: 1.3k
a/n: I’ll be honest, this isn’t my best work, but I thought why not get something out because I’m pretty sure the next chapter of mr americana and the heartbreak prince will be a little delayed cus I have so much work to do but I hope this tides you over until them lmao.
part 1, part 2, part 3
“Steve, I swear to god if you walk out that door, we’re done” you say as tears run down your face. It’s radio silent in the Avenger’s compound as Steve stands in front of you about to leave because Sharon had called him because of an ‘emergency.’ After she had found out that you were Steve’s girlfriend, she found ways to come in-between the both of you and somehow, she was succeeding. This was your third fight about Steve just leaving out of nowhere when she called for him, you don’t know how much of this you had in you.
“Don’t be dramatic y/n” he rolls his eyes, “we’ve been over this, she’s just a friend” he says, and you cross your arms over your chest. “Steve, how many times do I need to tell you that she is not just a friend to you? A month ago, she wanted to get into your pants” you raise your voice and Steve’s expression only grows more annoyed, “She doesn’t want me like that anymore!” he says, your expression grows even more annoyed. “If you step a foot out of that door Steve, I won’t be here when you get back” you threaten him and watch as he hesitates before he says,
“She needs me y/n” he pleads with you and tears if frustration line your eyes at his words. “What about me?!” you cry out at him incredulously, “she! Is not your girlfriend Steve! I am!” you throw your hands in the air as tears run down your face in silence and watch as Steve’s irritated demeanour breaks “I’m going y/n, we can talk about this when I get back” he says and slides a hand down his face in exasperation. “Steven Grant Rogers, don’t you dare” you threaten as he again walks to the door. “I’m sorry y/n, I’ll be back” he rushes to the door as he feels his phone buzz again.
As soon as the door to your shared room closes. You’re sliding down the wall as you sob uncontrollably, why was it so easy for him to pick her? Why did he pick her? Why were you never enough?
The rest of the Avengers stand outside your door, hearing your heartbreaking sobs is enough for tony to get Friday to unlock your door before he crouches down next to you, letting you wrap your arms around him and sob into his shirt. “Why wasn’t I enough?” you cry and Tony’s eyes mist over at your heartbroken whisper, he shakes his head as he rubs your back “you are perfect” he whispers as he kisses your forehead. Tony had always been like a father figure to you since you had joined the Avengers, a little older than Peter, he had taken you both under his wing and taught you everything you needed to know.
As much as it hurt all the Avengers to see you so broken, it hurt Tony that much more that this was the one source of pain he couldn’t protect you from. As your anguished sobbing turned into small sniffles, Tony lifts your head and wipes your nose with his sleeve, “eugh” he makes a face and smiles at the small laugh you produce.
You loom around the room to see Peter, Bucky, Sam, Natasha, Bruce, and Wanda all standing or sitting in different parts of the room, watching you with sad gazes, you know they’ve probably already heard the entire fight and you find yourself collecting yourself before you stand up with the help of Tony to look at all of them, “I cant stay here” you admit to them. Their faces fall as they realise that this isn’t your usual fight with Steve and by him choosing to check on Sharon instead of staying with you, he’s lost his place in your life.
Some nod solemnly and other eyes mist over yet they all share an overall agreement knowing that they are willing to do whatever they need to help you heal. It’s surprisingly Tony who voices what everyone else is thinking, “do you not want to wait to hear what he has to say?” he asks softly as you lean on his chest. You shake your head as tears begin to fill your eyes again. “I asked- “your voice breaks, “I begged him to stay” you tell them and watch as sympathy floods their faces.
Wanda and Natasha are the first one’s moving in order to get you out of there, they give everyone tasks so that you have some breathing room, Tony is organizing a safe house out of state while Sam and Bucky are working on getting a plane and pilot to fly you to it. Peter is making food and trying to stock up the house with groceries for the near future and Nat is overseeing his orders to make sure he doesn’t put just junk food on it.
Whist everything around you is moving faster than you can imagine for you to be out of the compound before Steve gets back, which according to Bucky is in the next hour, You and Wanda spend time packing your clothes and essentials you’ll need to have. The quiet in the room is comforting even though you can feel the anxiety slowly overcoming you at the idea of finally leaving Steve.
Wanda breaks the silence as she bombards you with a hug, “I could feel your pain, I thought this might help” and it does, Wanda has an aura around her that is so comforting for everyone around her. You both continue packing before you’re interrupted by Bucky knocking on your open door, he smiles sadly, “we’re ready for you” he says and you nod, picking up the two duffel bags lying on the floor, leaving a piece of paper on the bed before you walk out to the quinjet.
Bucky stops you before getting on the plane, as he grasps your arm, he pulls you into a hug and you know this is his way for apologizing for Steve’s behaviour. “it’s not your fault Buck” you whisper, and you feel him nod into the hug, you were both friends through Steve and you knew just how scared he must be in fear of losing you because of what his friend had done.
Peter is next and you can’t help but laugh through your tears as you see him with tears running down his pouting face, he looks like a puppy. “c’mon parker pull it together’ you roll your eyes and pull him into a hug as he sobs, “you do know I’m coming back, right?” you whisper as his sobs stop and he nods and you both giggle together. “we’re ready for take-off” you hear the pilot through the megaphone, and you release peter to walk onto the plane.
As soon as the door opens for you, you hear your voice being called desperately. “Y/N!!” you hear, and everyone turns around to meet Steve’s broken expression. “NO! Please just hear me out!!” he’s screaming through his tears however Bucky holds him back. “No! Stop the plane please! I need to talk to her” he yells and tries to fight off Bucky to get to you, but you ignore him and wipe your cheeks and make you way onto the plane, “NO! Please y/n stop! I’ll be better baby! Just get off the plane please!” his screams are drowned out as you make your way to the couches on the plane and sob.
“Y/N! Please! Let me talk to her! Please someone! Let me talk to her!” his voice becomes hoarse from all the yelling as he watches the plane take off, he doesn’t stop struggling in Bucky’s hold until the plane disappears. “I’m sorry, God I’m so sorry” he cries into his hands before he collapses, crushing your handwritten letter in one hand as he sobs. Bucky lets everyone leave as he sits with Steve on the ground, watching his best friend fall apart on the dark asphalt.
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sassypossumm · 2 months
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Don't Wanna Wake Up!
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Steve Rogers is the only person who can get you out of bed, though sometimes his methods can be rather... creative.
@zaraomarrogers this one's for you, I'm sorry I took so long, hope you like!!!
Word count: 1,284
Time to wake up, Y/N.” Steve called out, gently rapping on your door. With a groan, you rolled over and pulled the covers over your head. Steve pushed the door open and peaked in. Crossing his arms, he leaned against the doorframe and chuckled.
If there were only two things that were common knowledge around the tower, they were the facts that you were not a morning person, and that it was a bad idea to send anyone but Steve to wake you up. Your best friend only tried once, and she vowed that she’d never do that again.
“Five more minutes, Steve.” You grumbled, rolling into a ball. Steve shook his head and stepped into the room.
“I’ve given you ‘five more minutes’ four times, Y/N.” You could feel his presence at the end of the bed. He came to kneel next to your cocoon and tapped on your pillow. “Time to wake up, I have coffee.” You peaked out at him from your shell and squinted.
“Good coffee?” Steve fought a grin.
“Yes.” You narrowed your eyes at him for a moment before shaking your head and diving back under the covers.
“Five more minutes.” Steve sighed pulled himself to his feet.
“I didn’t want to have to do this, doll.” He paused to see if you’d respond. When you didn’t he moved to the foot of the bed and wrapped his hands around your ankles. Whipping the covers from over your head, you sat up and glared at him.
“You wouldn’t dare, Steven Rogers.” Steve gave you a mischievous grin and shrugged.
“Are you getting up?” Steve gave you a mischievous grin and cocked a brow. Well not now. You thought to yourself dryly, folding your arms. Scowling at him, you raised a brow in challenge.
“You wouldn’t.” Steve shrugged and began tugging on your ankles. With a squeal you rolled and grasped the head board with both hands. “Steven!” You cried, looking over your shoulder at him. Steve gave your ankles another tug, not even breaking a sweat. Huffing, you turned back to look at your hands gripping the head board. Your knuckles were turning white from the effort.
“Come on, Y/N, it’s already 10 o clock.” Steve grunted giving you another tug.
“I’m hibernating.” You called over your shoulder, doubling down on your grip on the head board. At this rate you’d be making yet another trip to the furniture store for a new one. But right now, you didn’t care. It was the principle of the thing.
“You’re not an animal, Y/N.” Steve said, dropping your legs. You rolled over and scooted up to rest your back against the head board.
“I can be whatever I want to be, Rogers.” You narrowed your eyes at him. Steve shook his head and put a knee on the bed. Your eyes widened, and you felt your whole-body tense with nervous energy. “What are you doing now, Rogers?” Your voice grew higher in pitch. Steve gave you a sly grin and placed his hand on the bed.
“I’m getting you out of this bed one way or another, sweetheart.”
“Now, Steve, darling, let’s be reasonable.” Steve chuckled and placed his other hand on the bed. You shuffled further against the head board as he crawled towards you. Without thinking you placed your foot against his forehead. Steve paused and glanced up at your foot with a raised brow. Feeling your face flush, you moved to pull your foot back only for Steve to grasp your ankle and stare at you with an amused grin.
“Steven,” You narrowed your eyes at him warily. Steve’s grin widened and he sat back on his knees and looked down at the foot he held prisoner. Looking back up at you, he lightly grazed the bottom of your foot with his thumb.
“Ah.” He chuckled when your whole-body jerked. “Some one’s ticklish.” He gave you a roguish wink and set your foot back on the bed. You felt your pulse begin to increase at the wolfish shadow darkening his eyes.
“Steve,” You squealed as Steve fairly pounced on you, dragging you down so you lay on your back and he hovered over you, caging you in with his arms. His fingers ghosted over your sides, testing for sensitive points, until your traitorous body gave you away. You flinched. Steve grinned and looked up at you. His fingers tapped on your side before beginning to tickle you mercilessly. Steve Rogers was a cruel man, and you told him as much between squeals. The man wasn’t even phased as he continued his assault.
“Please, Steve, I’ll get up, I’ll get up.” You cried and pushed at his hands. Steve’s fingers instantly froze and he looked down at you skeptically.
“Promise?” He cocked his head to the side and planted his hand on the bed next to your side. You shook your head rapidly.
“I promise! I promise!” Satisfied that he’d gotten his way, Steve pulled back to let you sit up. Finally noticing how much your hands hurt, you sat back against the head board and rubbed your knuckles. “You don’t love me anymore, Steve.” You grumbled, giving him a pitiful look. Steve reached out and gently took your hands in his own, rubbing small circles over the offended areas.
“I love you very much, that’s why I put in the effort that I do.” With a snort you pulled your hands out of his.
“Then love me less, Rogers.” Looking away from him was a mistake, as you found yourself flat on your back again, Steve hovering over you.
“I don’t think I can do that, Sugar.” He whispered, lacing his finger through yours and nuzzling your nose with his own.” The gesture would’ve been very romantic if at that moment you hadn’t realized you needed to pee.
“Steve.” You cleared your throat, looking up into his eyes.
“Hm?” He lowered himself to press more of his weight into you as he began paying particular attention to your neck. This only made your need for the bathroom more apparent. None too gently you began pushing at his chest. No dice.
“Steve,” Your plea turned into a moan when he reached the sensitive skin behind your ear. Taking that as a good sign, Steve focused his attack on that area. “Okay, whoa!” You reached for the only sensitive thing on him you could reach, his hair, and pulled hard.
“Hey!” He jumped back and hissed. You shoved him back and scrambled off the bed.
“I’m sorry, I love you, but I’ve got to pee!” You shouted, racing to the bathroom. Steve flopped back on the bed and rubbed the tender spot gently.
“You could’ve just said that.” He grumbled to himself. Blinking he stared up at the ceiling, not noticing the flush of the toilet or the running water. You inched back into the room and narrowed your eyes gleefully when you saw him stretched out on the bed. Quietly creeping into the room, you leapt on top of him. Steve groaned and wrapped an arm around you to keep you from rolling off and onto the floor. “Are you trying to kill me, woman? First my hair and now my ribcage!” You gave him an apologetic grin and folded your arms over his chest.
“I’m sorry. But I’m back.” You wiggled your brows and propped your chin on your arms. Steve gave you a dry look and sniffed.
“I don’t think I remember where we were.” You trailed the fingers of one hand up his chest and traced his jaw.
“I think I can jog your memory.”  It was Steve’s turn to flush.
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navybrat817 · 5 months
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Navy how's our lumber snack doing with Christmas around the corner? Are they snuggled up by the fire with hot cocoa?
That's exactly what he's doing, nonnie!
By the Fireplace
Pairing: Lumberjack!Steve Rogers x Female Reader Summary: Steve is exactly where he needs to be. Word Count: Over 500 Warnings: Fluff, Steve experiencing peace, established relationship, Steve Rogers (he’s a warning, okay?). A/N: Tiny ficlet for Beefcake and Tippy. ❤️ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @firefly-graphics. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
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The fireplace glowed with radiant flames as Steve took a seat on the floor beside you. He had added a couple of logs before he made the hot chocolate, the sweet scent of the warm beverage drifting to his nostrils before he took a sip. Soft music filled the air and he couldn’t help but smile when he caught you humming along. Like him, you didn’t want anything over-the-top for the holidays.
Just the pleasure of being with each other was more than enough.
“Don’t worry. I won’t damage your ears by singing,” you teased as you stretched a blanket over the two of you to share.
He chuckled as he wrapped a pair of strong arms around you. “It would take a lot more than your singing to damage my ears,” he teased back, brushing his beard along your cheek to make you giggle, the sound soft and pleasant. “So sing as much as you’d like.”
“I think I’ll just stick to writing,” you smiled, leaning into him with a gentle sigh. “Steve?”
“Yes, sweetheart?”
You didn’t say anything right away, but you did place a hand over his. “This is enough for you, right? This life?”
“It’s more than enough,” he answered without hesitation, hoping he hadn’t done or said something to make you think otherwise. He loved the home and life the two of you made together. If he did something to make you think otherwise, he’d have to remedy that immediately.
“Are you sure? There isn’t a small part of you that wishes you were fighting tonight?” You asked, tilting your head so you could stare into his eyes.
You once told Steve that you liked looking into people’s eyes because they always told the truth when some often weaved lies with their words. You chose to listen to the unspoken gazes. The eyes also conveyed so much emotion, the very windows to the soul because you could see right through them.
And he had nothing to hide from you.
He understood why you asked though. Deep down he was still the man of action who couldn’t turn a blind eye when things pointed south. But you were the one of the reasons he still occasionally fought. He had a home to defend and someone to come back to. Something to fight for.
You were his home.
“No. Not tonight,” he replied with an unwavering tone and stare so you’d know how serious he was. “This is exactly where I’m meant to be. Right by our fireplace with hot chocolate nearby and you in my arms.”
With soft eyes full of love, you brought your lips to his. It ignited a flame inside him almost as warm and bright as the crackling fire feet away. The pieces of his heart that he struggled to put together after the ice connected the moment the two of you met. You were his glue and strength.
And like the winter holiday encouraged, he felt a sense of love and peace by being in the moment.
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Just like Bucky, Steve deserves peace, too. Love and thanks for reading. ❤️
Masterlist ⚓ Steve Rogers Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi
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sergeantbarnessdoll · 14 days
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Hey hun ☺️
just read your new Bucky barnes fic (the one with the pinup girl) and it gave me an idea.
what abt Steve Rogers (the 1940s one) meeting {and fucking} his celebrity crush who he has fantasised about and been in love with since FOREVER and she was like the only girl he ever thought about back when all the girls buck set him up with would reject him (If that makes sense, like she gave him hope or sm)
🥰🥰
Better Than Fantasies » Post Serum Steve Rogers
Pairings: Post Serum Steve Rogers x Celebrity!Female Reader
Summary: Steve’s fantasies are way better than he imagines when he meets his celebrity crush.
Warnings: mix of Fluff and Smut (18+), language, alcohol, flirting, kissing, hickeys, blowjob, unprotected sex, riding, praise kink, size kink, Steve’s dog tags, pet names
A/N: Thank you to the lovely anonymous person who requested this🩵 also I hope you don’t mind that I choose to write this with Post Serum Steve Rogers cause that’s how I imagined it🥰
Written on my phone. I’m sorry for any mistakes.
Header made by @buckys-wintersoldier
GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creators. I found it on Pinterest.
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!🔞
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Steve knew who you are the second he seen you. He stopped in his tracks when he seen you talking to Peggy. Bucky walked up next to him, furrowing his eyebrows when he seen his best friend in a daze.
“What are you staring at?” Bucky asks him.
“Her.” Is all Steve said.
Bucky followed Steve’s gaze to you. He smirks to himself, knowing who you are as well. You’re Steve’s celebrity crush.
“What’s she doing here?” Steve asks curiously.
“I don’t know.” Bucky shrugs his shoulders.
Steve’s eyes widened and his heart began pounding when you started walking towards him. Bucky watched as Steve smoothed out his uniform and fixed his hair.
“Here’s two more of our soldiers.” Peggy tells you. “This is Captain Steve Rogers and Sergeant James Barnes. Boys, this is Y/N Y/L/N.” She introduced you to them. “I’m sure you two have heard of her.” She says.
“It’s very nice to meet you guys!” You say with a smile, holding out your hand for them to shake.
Bucky shook your hand while Steve continued to stare at you in awe. He couldn’t believe this was happening. He thought he’d never get a chance to meet you, but here he is right now. Bucky gently elbows Steve in his side to snap him out of his thoughts.
“You have to forgive him. He’s a big fan of yours.” Bucky says.
“That’s sweet.” You smiled at him. “Peggy said she’s going to show me around the base, but I would love to hangout with you if that’s ok.” You say.
“That’s more than ok with me.” Steve says, feeling his cheeks heat up.
You gave him a smile before following Peggy for a tour of the Army base.
“She wants to hangout with me.” Steve says to himself. “She wants to hangout with me!” He says again, a smile growing on his face.
Bucky couldn’t help but smile, happy that his best friend might be able to have a chance with a girl. He set him up with girls, but they always rejected him. That was before he got the serum.
Later that day, Steve and Bucky went to a bar after a day of training. Heads turned when you walked in the bar. Steve turned around, smiling when he seen you. You made eye contact with him and smiled, making your way over to him.
“Hi, Steve.” You say with a smile, taking a seat next to you.
“Hi, Y/N.” Steve says, smiling.
“Hi, Bucky.” You say.
“Hi, Y/N.” Bucky stood up. “I’ll leave you two alone.” He says, winking at Steve before walking away.
You ordered yourself a drink and sat back down at the table with Steve.
“So Steve…” You took a sip of your drink. “Tell me about yourself.” You say.
Steve looked at you for a moment, blinking a couple times. This is the first time a girl has ever wanted to get to know him.
“Umm well…” Steve starts. “I grew up in Brooklyn, New York with Bucky.” He says.
“That’s it?” You asked.
“I’m sorry.” He apologizes. “This is the first time a girl asked to get to know me. Girls have rejected me a lot in the past.” He says, his cheeks turning red in embarrassment.
“Hey…” You put a hand on top of his. “You have nothing to apologize for.” You tell him in almost a whisper. “Besides those girls are missing out.” You say.
A smile formed on Steve’s lips.
“I like you. That’s all that matters.” You smiled at him. “Wanna get out of here?” You asked.
“Yes!” Steve says a little too fast.
You stood up, holding your hand out for him which he happily took in his. You two walked out of the bar hand in hand, making your way to his bunk.
“Nice poster.” You say, smiling when you seen a poster of you on his wall.
“Bucky got it for me for my birthday last year.” He tells you.
“That’s nice of him.” You say with a smile.
Awkward silence filled the room. Steve wasn’t sure what to say to you. He didn’t think he’d get this far.
“So Steve…” You walked towards him, making him walk backwards. “We both know that we didn’t come here to talk.” You say.
“We-” His back hit the closed door behind him. “We didn’t?” He says more like a question.
“Let me ask you something…” Your hand grasped his tie, making his breath hitch in his throat. “Have you ever kissed a girl, Captain?” You asked.
“No.” He answers, his cheeks turning red in embarrassment.
You gave his tie a tug, pulling him down just enough for you to kiss him. Steve was caught by surprise, but he kissed you back. His hands found their way to your waist. Your free hand roamed his body, stopping on his bulge. Steve slightly jumped at your boldness.
“Wait a second…” Steve breathes, pulling away from your lips.
“Is something wrong?” You asked, looking in his beautiful blue eyes.
“I’m- I’m a virgin.” He tells you, his cheeks turning red in embarrassment.
“Oh god…” You took your hand off of his bulge. “I’m so sorry.” You apologized. “I didn’t mean to overstep.” You say.
“It’s ok.” He assures. “If I’m being honest, I have been fantasizing about this.” He tells you. “Kissing you and more.” He says.
“Tell me about the more part, Captain.” You say, biting your bottom lip.
“You on your knees, sucking my… cock.” His cheeks turned even more red. “Then we get on my bed and have sex.” He says.
“Lucky for you, Captain, I can make those fantasies come true.” You seductively said. “Only if you want to.” You say.
“Yes please.” He says.
You sunk down to your knees. You looked up at him, waiting for permission to go further. He nodded his head, meeting you know you can go further. You unbuckled his belt and undid his dress pants, pulling his pants down just enough for his hard cock to spring out. Your eyes widen at his size. You wrapped your hand around his cock and pumped it in your hand, swiping your thumb over his tip to use his precum as a lubricant while looking up at him with an innocent look on your face. A small moan fell from Steve’s lips. You wrapped your lips around his tip, sucking on it a little before moving your mouth further down on his cock. You bobbed your head while your hand pumped what couldn’t fit in your mouth.
“Oh my god…” Steve moans, loving the feeling of your mouth.
Steve felt like he was in another world. He couldn’t believe this was happening. His celebrity crush on her knees and sucking his cock. He never thought this would happen. This is the farthest he’s ever been with a girl. He knows one thing, he loves what’s happening in this very moment.
Steve was snapped out of his thoughts when you took his cock out of your mouth and licked from the base of his cock to his tip. You also licked along the veins of his cock. His eyes rolled to the back of his head when you did that.
“Fuck…” He moans. “Do that again.” He says.
You obeyed him and did it again. A moan of your name left his lips when you did that. He watched closely as your tongue swirled around his cock. Your tongue swirled around his tip, making him want more. Your hand pumped his cock as you continued your actions with your tongue. Steve felt his orgasm building up sooner than he liked.
“I-I’m close.” Steve stutters through a moan.
You put his cock back in your mouth and sucked his cock like your life depends on it. He was getting closer and closer to the edge when a loud moan of your name left his lips as he came in your mouth. Steve leaned against the door panting while you stood up from the floor, your knees red from being on the floor for so long. Steve’s eyes were filled with lust as he looked at you.
Steve got a confidence boost and kissed you hungrily. You moaned against his lips. He pushed the straps of your dress off of your shoulders and pulled your dress off your body, letting it pool around your feet. One of Steve’s hands went behind your back and unclasped your bra, letting it fall from your chest. He picked you up and walked you over to his bed, gently laying you down.
“How’s it fair that I’m almost naked and you’re not?” You say with a playful pout.
Steve chuckles before standing up and took off his clothes. He spread your legs and hovered over you. His Army dog tags were dangling above you. You grasped on the chain and pulled him down for another hungry kiss. His lips moved to your neck. You gasped when you felt his teeth nip at your skin hard enough for a hickey. He kissed his way down your body, stopping at the waistband of your panties. He looked up at you for permission. You lifted your hips, giving him permission. Steve hooked his fingers in the waistband of your panties and pulled them down your legs, dropping them on the floor by his bed. He kissed your inner thighs, getting closer to where you need him most. A shiver went through your body when you felt his breath on your pussy.
Steve paused for a moment, not sure what to do next. He licked his lips at the sight of your wet pussy. He knows one thing… he’s always wondered what you taste like. His tongue gave your pussy a curious lick, moaning at your taste. A moan left your lips when he did that. He did it again, earning another moan from you. His tongue licked from your entrance to your clit. He swirled his tongue in circles around your clit. Steve knew he was doing something right when you kept moaning his name. He decided to take it a step further. He wrapped his arms around your thighs and pulled you closer to him. He latched his lips on your clit and sucked on it while his tongue moved against your folds. Your hands found their way to his head, tugging on his hair.
“Oh Steve!” You moaned.
Your moans encouraged Steve. His tongue moved faster against your folds. One of his arms unwrapped from your thigh, bring his fingers to your pussy. He slowly slid one finger inside of you, groaning when he felt your tightness around his finger. You moaned when you felt his finger moving along your walls.
For Steve’s first time making a woman feel good, he’s aced it. You felt like you were on top of the world with the way he was making you feel in this very moment. You learned something new about him in that moment, he’s skilled with his fingers and tongue. Your curiosity was peaked. You let your mind wander. You were wondering what his cock felt like inside of you. Your thoughts were cut short when Steve unexpectedly slid another finger in your pussy.
“Oh fuck, Steve!” You moaned more in a whine.
Steve’s eyes glanced up at you, watching as pleasure took over your body. His other arm let go of your thigh and slid his hand up your body, stopping at your breasts. His thumb rubbed over your nipple before pinching it. A moan left your lips and a tingling sensation went through your body. He repeated his actions with your other breast, earning the same reaction from you. You arched your back off the bed in pleasure, pushing your breasts more into his hand.
“Oh yes, fuck!” You moaned loudly when his fingers hit your sweet spot. “Right there!” You tell him, followed by a moan.
Steve’s fingers continued to hit your sweet spot while his mouth worked on your clit and his free hand stayed on your breast. Soon enough, your orgasm was building up. Rather quickly you might add.
“I’m so close!” You moaned.
His name left your lips as you came, soaking his face and fingers. Steve pulled his fingers out of your pussy and sat up, hovering over you. You stared up at him, trying to catch your breath.
“How- Where-” You were unable to form a coherent sentence as you tried to ask Steve where he learned to eat a girl out like that.
“If you’re wondering where I learned how to eat out a girl, Bucky told me how.” Steve says.
“Remind me to thank him later.” You giggled. “Now…” You used all of your strength to flip the two of you over so Steve was laying on the bed and you were on top of him, straddling him. “I want to make your fantasies come true.” You lean down to kiss him. “Only if you want to go any further.” You say, not wanting to pressure him into doing anything he doesn’t want to do.
“Please…” He begs. “I want this. I want you.” He says.
You kissed him once more before lifting yourself up and picked up his cock, lining it at your tight entrance. Both of you gasped, when you slowly sunk down on his cock. His tip only stretched your pussy. It hurt, but it also felt good. Steve watched intensely as his cock disappeared in your pussy. Steve groans softly, loving the tight feeling of your pussy wrapped around his cock. You on the other hand took a moment to adjust to his size.
“Don’t be afraid to get handsy with me, Captain.” You say seductively.
You placed your hands on Steve’s strong chest and moved up, only leaving his tip inside of you and slide back down. You rode him at a decent pace, not wanting to overwhelm him during his first time.
“Y-You can go faster if you want.” Steve stutters through a small moan.
You increased your speed just enough to get you two wanting more. Steve was mesmerized by your breasts bouncing as you rode him. He lifted his hands to your breasts and played with them as you rode him. Suddenly, Steve wrapped one of his arms around your waist and sat up, leaning his back against the headboard so he can mark up your breasts with hickeys. That created a new angle for the both of you.
“Oh fuck, Steve!” You moaned.
One of Steve’s hands was occupied with your breasts while his free hand roamed your body, stopping on your ass and gave your ass cheek a squeeze. You playfully gasped at his actions. You leaned your head down and placed your lips on his neck, marking him up.
“There.” You pulled away from his neck, grinning as a hickey slowly began to form on his skin. “Now everyone will know that you’re mine now.” You say, biting your bottom lip.
Steve moaned when you called him yours. It’s like he wants everyone to know that he belongs to you now.
“You like that?” You almost whispered. “You want everyone to know who you belong to?” You asked seductively.
Steve nodded his head eagerly. You bit your bottom lip as you put your hands on his strong shoulders, steadying yourself. Steve’s hand that was on your breasts wandered down to your ass. His hands grasped your ass cheeks and moved you faster on his cock. Loud moans left your lips at his actions. Your eyes fluttered shut and you tilted your head back, enjoying the pleasure. A small squeak left your lips when Steve pinched your ass cheek.
“Eyes on me.” He tells you. “I want you to look at me while you ride me.” He says confidently.
You looked in his beautiful blue eyes that are now filled with lust. You leaned down, kissing him sloppily. Your hands found their way to his head, your fingers tugging at his hair. He moaned at the feeling. You pulled away from his lips, tilting your head back and moaned when his cock hit your sweet spot.
“Yes! Fuck!” You moaned.
Steve knew he found your sweet spot again and smirked proudly. One of his hands found its way to where the two of you are connected and began to rub your clit in circles.
“You’re going to make me cum if you keep doing that!” You moaned, referring to his fingers rubbing your clit.
That was Steve’s goal. He applied a little bit of pressure on your clit as he continued to rub it causing your pussy to squeeze around his cock. Steve moaned at the feeling. You felt your beginning to build up the more he rubbed your clit. You felt your lower stomach tighten. It felt like a rubber band was about to snap inside of you.
“Stevie, I’m- mmm fuck!” You were cut off by a moan leaving your lips.
“Cum for me, sweetheart.” Steve says huskily.
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head and a loud moan of his name left your lips as you came. Steve gave your clit one last rub before focusing on his own orgasm which wasn’t too far behind yours. You could tell that he was getting closer to cumming from how sloppy his thrusts were as he thrusted up into you.
“I know you’re close.” You panted. “Cum for me, Stevie. Cum inside of me.” You say followed by a moan.
After a few more thrusts, Steve came inside of you. Your bouncing and his thrusts came to a slow stop. He carefully lifted you up, his cock sliding out of you, making you whine at the loss of his cock being inside of you. He carefully laid you down next to him and covered the two of you up with a blanket and wrapped his arm around you while you laid you laid your head on his chest, your fingers playing with his dog tags.
“That was way better than what I fantasized.” Steve says after a couple minutes of silence.
“I’m happy that I made your fantasies come true.” You say, leaning up to kiss his lips softly.
“Thank you for giving me a chance.” He says.
“I will always give you a chance, Stevie.” You say with a smile.
🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖
-Bucky’s Doll
147 notes · View notes
neonovember · 2 years
Note
Loved loved loved the steve headcanon. If you’re in the mood, I would an expansion on the “steve is the type of man to never let you go to bed angry, even if you’ve both had a fight and he end up on the coach” because I absolutely agreed and I especially enjoyed reading that! Thank you for sharing this husband!Steve HC.
oh yes most definitely! His mind wouldn't rest until he knows you're at peace. Ask and you shall receive (i must say I did get quite carried away). I wrote this at 1 am so be aware of spelling :)
The Steve headcanon
My soul cannot sleep without you
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The rumble of the car engine comes to a stop as Steve pulls into the garage of your shared home, the living room light is still on and if you weren't already irritated, you'd mentally smack yourself for being so forgetful. Bills weren't cheap, even on an avenger's salary. 
Collecting the ends of your dress you shoulder your way through the car door, slamming it with an oomf for good measure. Steve, of course, shuts his door gently, and it leaves you even more annoyed with him. 
Why is he not angry? 
You don't dare look behind you as Steve begins to jog towards you, you fear the confusion that has been plastered on his face for the last 20 minutes would make you explode. 
You're about to open the door until you remember, he has the keys, Steve is already one step ahead of you, fingers brushing past your elbow as he twists the golden metal into the door nob. You can feel his stare burning into the side of your face but you will yourself not to look his way, to see that look on his face that would have you conceding.
The smell of peppercorn and maple engulfs your senses as you enter your hallway, the soft air of familiarity fails to calm your tense shoulders however, as you pass the framed pictures of you and Steve over the years without so much as a glance.
Reaching your kitchen you notice the bouquet of orchids Steve had bought you earlier today left on the counter, in the rush to get to the compound's charity ball on time you had forgotten to find them a vase.
What flowers would she like?
You search through the kitchen cabinets before you grasp the clear glass, shufflingly through appliances and setting it on the granite counter. You unwrap the orchids, cutting the stems down to fit into the glass vase and filling them generously with water. Steve looks at you incredulously, arms folded as his eyes follow your movements.
"Are you going to say something?" Steve says, his melodic voice travelling through the house, bouncing off the glass vase yet failing to penetrate you.
You begin to clean the stems and spilt water from the counter, ignoring Steve’s attempt at conversation. Did he seriously not realise the brunette practically hanging onto his every word?
Steves's hand grasp your own, stopping you from wiping down the rest of the kitchen, he lifts your chin but your eyes remain downcast, fiddling with the string of the washcloth.
"Can you at least look at me?" Steve says, scanning your face that remained emotionless. His fingers glide across your arms to rest on your cheeks, and the feeling of his hands on you, after she'd touched them has you ripping them off of you. Scoffing, you throw the washcloth into the sink, before turning towards Steve.
"I don't understand, why are you upset? Did I do something?" Steve furrows his brows, his hands gripping his pants as if he's stopping himself from reaching for you.
You scoff at that, "You can't be serious Steve, you are one of the smartest people I know and you can't notice something happening right in front of you?"
He shakes his head, eyes squeezing as he opens them, you notice him scanning over the events prior, but it comes up empty and it has Steve looking more confused than before.
“What's her name, huh Steve? At least tell me her name” You whisper, arms folded as the shimmers of the dress begin to irritate you.
“What? Who?” Steve replies, stepping closer to you
“Who? The brunette who was hanging off of you the entire night Steven” You groan, you hated facing your insecurities, much less voicing them.
There is a momentary pause in Steve as his mind backtracks to the evening, sifting through the hundreds of faces he’d seen tonight, he finally realises who you're talking about.
Tony’s accountant
“Marianna?” Steve scoffs
“Yes, Marianna” You spit her name like poison, but you can’t seem to get her face out of your mind, she’s taken homage next to the laundry you hadn't gotten the time to do. The way her pantsuit fitted her elegantly, sophisticated and modern, she was the woman of the future. And you were just, well, you.
She could pull off a red lip, something that never quite looked good on you, and the very way she spoke told you she said very few words that didn't ilicitate constant adoration. She didn't need to fill the space with empty jargon, every word had meaning.
The constant comparison had followed you the entire evening, and the past insecurities that you had thought you'd overcome seemed to weigh you down like an anchor, pulling you into the deprecation you knew all too well.
It was fine, you’d get over it until she began to talk to Steve, your husband. you didn't miss the look on her face as they conversed, utter, pure amazement. You knew it because you wore it every day, Steve had a way with people, it's what attracted you to him in the first place.
You felt out of place as they spoke about diplomacy and business, and at that moment you had wished you actually listened when Tony pulled you into one of the many long rants you'd gotten used to. 
She wasn't even mean to you as if the playground tactics were beneath her, but it didn't take her calling you a bitch to know the animosity that radiated from her every time Steve had tried to pull you into their conversation. You knew where you weren't wanted and you weren't about to make a fool of yourself. So you left them to it as you sat next to Natasha, who offered you a much-needed drink.
She had noticed your annoyance at Marianna the second she came over, as she always did, and for a second, you wish Steve would too. He was too pure too good, to take notice of the way Marianna got closer and closer to him or the way she bit her lip and laughed a little too hard at one of his lame jokes. The poor man thought she was being friendly, he was oblivious to her true motives.
Natasha held her grin behind an empty champagne glass, snickering when Marianna threw her head back for good measure. You had vented to her there, and she reminded you of the man Steve was. How he was absolutely enamoured by you and you only, how you had him wrapped around your finger so tight he wouldn't even think about looking at another woman that way. It was all things you knew deep down, but that didn't stop your brain from imagining the worst, that he was deep in an affair with his co-worker, and you were the dumb clueless wife who waited for him at home.
You wouldn't let that happen again, not after all those years of betrayal from an ex, you wouldn't let yourself be made a fool. Pride had a way of getting in between reality, and you let it stew you in anger until you were mad at Steve instead of her.
Steve shakes his head, moving closer to you,
“She's just Tony’s accountant, we chatted for a few, that's all doll” Steve replied, carding a hand through his blonde locks. Reasoning, however, doesn't seem to be on your mind tonight as you remember all the lies you've been told starting with she.
She’s just a friend, she’s just an assistant, she’s just...
“Well, she seemed to have taken your attention for the whole night, while I was left drinking champagne of all fucking things with Natasha. She was meant to go find her date for that night, but instead, she was with me” You replied looking towards him in anger.
“Well, I tried to include you in the conversation, but every time I asked for your opinion your mind seemed as if it was a thousand miles away!” Steve replied swiftly hands gesturing around.
“Yeah, because she was laughing every single goddamn time I opened my mouth, god Steve, can't you see what she’s doing?” You replied even faster, swallowing down the brick that began to form in your throat.
“What, what is she doing, I thought I was having a conversation with a colleague, but you seem to know better” Steve quipped, his jaw tensing and his shoulders seized.
“She wants you, and you’re either too blind to see it or already fucking know it” You replied, muttering under your breath.
Steve scoffs, shaking his head, eyes scanning your face as he remains silent.
“Is your silence meant to mean I was right?” You yell, tears beginning to gather on your waterline and you have to pinch yourself to get force them to remain there.
Steve’s eyes never leave your face, the cerulean orbs darting left and right, and up and down as if trying to understand your benevolence. His arm twitches as if he wants to gather you into his embrace and forget this entire evening.
“How can you say that” Steve replies, after a short while, “I was courteous, polite for god's sake, you know I would never do that to you” Steve moves until his hands grasp your own. They’re warm to the touch like he always is, and they begin to soothe the coldness that has begun to take over your body.
It doesn't help though, instead, it reminds you of the times you've been told that your insecurities were imaginary, that the unfaithfulness in your relationship wasn't real. That you, instead were harbouring a secret, the anger you felt then turned to guilt at your own self for even accusing him of cheating. If you were told enough times that your reality wasn't yours, you’d start to believe it.
“Yeah well, the only person I can ever trust is myself” You whisper, spitting the words out and unlatching yourself from Steve's grasp. Steve looks down at you in shock, betrayal and hurt falling over his features, whilst yours turn to stone.
He closes his eyes before opening them again, nodding as if he accepted your anger.
“Fine, I’m taking the couch,” Steve scoffs, ripping off his tie and placing it on the counter, before walking into the living room the loud stomp of his shoes vibrating through the quiet house.
You turn to the discarded tie, grasping it into your palm, the texture of the material felt velvet against your fingers. It was a plain tie, one you'd find anywhere, but it was the first tie you'd ever gotten him. You'd gifted him many over the years, all of them more expensive and chic than this one but he'd told you you'd have to pry it out of his cold dead hands before he would give it up. 
It was his lucky tie because you were his lucky girl.
Where you still now?
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The satin pillow dampened with your tears, you hadn't waited to even close the door before you were muffling a sob that broke out of your throat. Since then, the tears never ceased, you had to shove your face into the covers to make sure Steve wouldn't hear you.
Sleep was fruitless, you had tried everything, but you lay there, like clothes on a washing line, wrung out and left to dry. Your mind wouldn't let the image leave, her fingers grabbing his bicep as she laughed, the way he grinned as his humour got praised.
Was that it, had she given him more attention? More than you?
A billion reasons clamoured your mind as you pushed your fingertips to your eyelids, wishing that you hadn't even gone to the charity ball at all, save the humiliation just for your mind only.
Deep down you knew, you knew that this was all the insecurities of your past coming forth from their hiding places. Steve was the best person in your entire life, he would never, his stupidly good heart wouldn't allow it. But that was just it, he was too kind and nice and good that people like Marianna were able to sink their claws and have their way with him however they wanted.
He thought they were being friendly, but they knew they weren't.
Hours seem to pass before you find the room illuminated with the light of your phone in your palm, your chest feels tight and uncomfortable and you don't know how much more of this you could take.
Tapping onto the folder named “him”, you are met with hundreds of photos of you and Steve throughout the years, starting from the very few dates you had before he claimed you as his, till the wedding night when you both had stayed up to take out the millions of pins in your intricate hair.
In all of them, every single one, Steve displays the same adored, content look of utter satisfaction and love, his eyes sparkled with it, like the sun glittering against the gentle waves and folds of the sea. An endless pool of longing that seemed to have depth only for you, to crash and fight and turn inside and out for you.
Your relationship was never easy, but Steve has always, always been the anchor that brought you back, he never gave up, even when you pushed him away and left him in the dark. Even when the fear of loss and hurt caused you to scream things you didn't mean and do things you shouldn’t have.
You flick across to a photo of Steve looking towards you, a soft grin lighting up his face as you held Clint’s newborn, you were cuddled up on a seat, your knees tucked into you as you were sucked into the guilty pleasure of red fat cheeks and baby fever.
Sam had captured it without Steve looking, sending it to you a couple of days ago with the words ‘Someone wants to be a daddy’. You’d laughed it off but each day you'd come back to that picture. Back to the moment when Steve looked like he had never loved something harder than you, as if it was his first time ever really feeling it.
He loves you, you know? I knew it the day he met you, he has this look on his face, where his eyes get all glazed over and his fingers are reaching for you. It’s like he can’t breathe until he can hold you, like his body will break in two and his heart will stop.
Natasha had told you that one night on the terrace unprovoked, with a beer in her hand and the moonlight falling over the both of you. She had been there from the start, had found you when you were still a shell of a person, back then you didn't even know what love was. You fear if it wasn't for her you and Steve wouldn't have ever met.
“Steve would never do that” 
The sounds of her voice those hours ago ring in your head. It was true, your entire time with Steve told you but what thing, he was not your ex. He was kind, and soft and held you like you were glass and he'd crush you. And then suddenly, as if a switch had been turned in your mind, the light of a dark place turning on you realise how utter fucking foolish you had been.
Steve’s faith in you never faltered, even when it should have he never felt a reason to distrust you, it was foreign, it felt strange to have someone utterly and fully hand their trust and soul to you. And what had you given him in return? Accusations and anger. 
Did he think now, that you did not trust him? That he had failed to show you how you should be loved? How he would never hurt you?
Those men from your past would never amount to Steve, and suddenly you felt you would die right in this room if you didn’t move. If you tell Steve he was enough and that you believed him and that the vows he uttered held true. Every hair on your body itched with this need until the covers were thrown across from your body and your phone was discarded on the bed.
You swung open the door, the cold hair hitting your face and you stumbled through the dark, you run down the hardwood stairs, the haunting reality of your actions following you, you had been so so foolish.
Steve is there, his frantic motions walking towards the bedroom freeze as he notices you. His shirt is crumpled and unbuttoned, and his golden hair is ruffled, the strands falling over his face as if he's run his fingers through it too many times. 
A look of desperation and longing paint his features as he watched you, hands shaking at his sides as he sinks his canines into his reddend lip. You wanted nothing but to hold him now, and the thought bring you to tears, blurring your vision until you miss a step, your heart dropping into your stomach as you brace yourself, waiting to meet the cold hard ground of the kitchen floor.
It never comes, instead, heated, carded muscle wraps around you, and you the smell of Steve, of earth and pine cones has you crying into his shoulder.
He came to you, even when you had screamed at him to leave,
He came to you.
Fresh tears slide down your cheek and you grip Steve, whose fingers softly rub your back, hands tightening around your waist.
“M’ sorry, so sorry Steve, please” You hiccup, covering your face into his shoulder.
“Ssh, my sweet girl, I know” Steve whispers, never seizing his gentle caress. His hands lift your face from his neck, thumb gathering the tears at your waterline. “I know, it’s okay, it’s okay, just breathe for me, hm? 
“In and out, can you do that for me?” Steve breathes out, eyes straining as he watches your shallow breaths ease into semi-normal respiration.
Without a word, Steve collects you in his arms and walks through the house until he enters the bedroom, shutting the door with his foot, eyes never leaving your face as he gently places you onto the now cold bedsheets.
You shudder, reaching for him as he slides in, arms wrap around your sides as he continues his light motions on your back, his fingers come to move your hair behind your ear, pressing a soft kiss to your neck.
You turn around swiftly, hands reaching to cup his face before you’re met with his reddened eyes, it's your turn now to brush away the tears before pressing your lips to his,
‘I should never have, Stevie, you, I-, you would never” You whisper against him his chest, the soft rise and fall lulling you into a state of haze and exhaustion. He presses his forehead to yours
“I just want to hold you now, god, I don't know what I will do if I don’t hold you” Steve replies muttering the words painfully. You wrap your arms around him, pressing yourself into his stomach as his biceps surround you. The sound of Steve's heartbeat, the rhythmic badum badum badum, engulfs you with a sense of tranquillity you hadn’t realised you couldn’t live without.
Steve, your sweet boy, was the one thing you couldn’t live without, without Steve, next to you, holding you between his arms, you don't think you would ever quite find sleep. Not anymore, not after him.
2K notes · View notes
anonymityisfunwriter · 3 months
Text
To Know Him Is To Love Him
summary: to know steve rogers is to love him. to know him is to keep handing over your heart over and over again. to know him is to be broken by him.
pairing: steve rogers x reader
an: quick someone give this to a boy to read and ask him what steve did wrong. it's for science.
Anon's 1K Celebration
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to know him is to love him.
to know him is to stand by him.
to know him is to allow him to break your heart over and over again.
to know him is to hope that one day he'll finally see.
to know him is to be broken by him.
you can't count how many times he put you here, put in this situation. and worse, you can't count how many times you've let him put you in this situation.
three months ago...
you fix steve's tie, patting his shoulder to send him off on yet another date - after he invited himself into your apartment to get him ready for his date. you hated this feeling, the feeling of unrequited love.
you can't blame him, he doesn't know. at least, you think he doesn't know. in fact, you're sure he doesn't, he would never hurt you like that.
"i swear if this date doesn't go well, i'm swearing off women for good."
"does that mean i'm out a friend?" you tease.
"no, of course not," steve laughs. "you're my best friend. you don't count."
your smile falls at the words fall out of his mouth with ease. you don't count. you're not even a consideration. "i don't count as a woman?"
"you know what i meant. you're my friend."
you don't know what he meant. not in the slightest.
"right," you clear your throat, shaking your head with furrowed brows. "good luck on your date."
two months ago...
"i would tell him, but he's just - he's confusing," you admit. "i get a lot of mixed signals."
"men are just idiots," nat offers in consolation. "someday, he'll see. you're perfect for each other."
"thanks." you smile, walking back to your table with a fresh round of drinks. "what are you guys talking about?"
"about steve's terrible dating record," sam jokes.
"ah," you hum, you settle in the booth beside him, leaving plenty of room between the two of you.
steve frowns at you, reaching behind you and gripping your waist. without a word, he slides you until you're pressed against his thigh.
sam humorously snorts, "i don't get you two. you're attached at the hip. you're both attractive singles. make it official already."
you look to steve's reaction for any indication of what he's feeling. steve leans over, kissing your temple, "she knows she's my other half, my soulmate. we don't need labels."
"soulmate?" sam teases.
you shift uncomfortably. he never asked you that, never asked you if you wanted a label. he's never even asked you on a real date, but now he's declaring that he's your soulmate.
how blind can he be?
one month ago...
"please, i miss you, sweetheart." you squeeze your eyes shut. the term of endearment rolls so easily off his tongue. "i feel like i haven't seen you in forever."
it's intentional. you're trying to get over him. to move past these feelings. he doesn't make it easy. "i know, i've just been busy."
"how about dinner tonight? my place at 8?"
you chew on the inside of your cheek, hesitant to accept his dinner invite, "i don't know, steve."
"please, i need you."
putting distance between you and steve rogers didn't work. not when he so dutifully sought you out. not when he told you over and over again that he missed you. that he didn't know how to be without you.
his words toy with your head just enough to convince that it's a good idea to enter his gravitational orbit again.
you're not strong enough to resist the pull. you're not strong enough to to say no. you never have been.
you decide that you can't do this. you're going to tell him. you'll tell him. you'll tell him that you want to count. you'll tell him that you want him to see you.
to know him is to love him, you remember. the moment you see him, you crumble. that smile that makes it feel like your life is worthwhile. the eyes that send your rational mind into a haze. to know him is to love him.
he doesn't make it easy for you or your heart. he greets you at the door with a beaming grin, his eyes lighting up. it makes you feel like this is more than just a dinner. it feels like you're finally coming home to him.
you falter as his fingers graze your skin to take off your jacket. the apartment isn't his usual scene either. it feels like so much more than just a normal hangout. it feels... romantic. music spinning on his record player, marvin gaye, you recognize. candles lit in the center of the table. the smell of a home cooked meal simmering over the stove.
you turn to him with a nervous smile, "i thought you we were ordering pizza or something."
"i wanted to do something nice for my best girl."
his best girl.
he spends the whole dinner fawning over you. his hand rests on your leg. the other occasionally grazing the back of your hand. he asks you all about your work, about your love life.
"i missed you so much."
you're so entranced by him that your carefully thought out speech is gone, replaced by a soft whisper, "i love you."
"i love you, too." he smiles down at him. his eyes shining bright and blue. it doesn't even occur to him that you're professing your love for him. "i can't imagine my life without you."
you shake your head, reminding yourself that you had to tell him. you needed to move forward, one way or another. "no, steve, i - i'm in love with you."
an anxious chuckle leaves his mouth. his hand drops from your thigh, leaving you feeling cold, hollow, and abandoned. "what?"
you know a rejection when you see one. at least you can move on now. your heart can begin to heal. maybe in time, you could be friends again. "i just had to tell you. just once."
"i don't -" he licks his lips. "i'm sorry, i don't feel the same."
"i understand."
2 weeks ago...
you sigh at yourself, hearing the familiar ding of another voicemail on your phone.
each one chips away at your resolve, each one shatters your broken heart even more.
you told him you understood. you told him that it was okay. you spent the night consoling him. you soothed his fears that he would lose you.
in return, he made you promise to always be in his life. with a broken heart and wounded pride, you weren't strong enough to say no. you simply asked for time and a little space.
time and space that steve had no interest in giving you.
you made it easy for him. you retreated from mutual friends. from social spaces you occupied. you no longer texted or called first. you just needed time.
still, he sought you out.
you've gained enough strength to stop answering his every call and text. you've stuck to your boundaries, at least, the ones steve doesn't seem intent on steamrolling past.
you clutch your kitchen counter with your head hung low. with a couple deep breaths and reminders that he doesn't feel the same for you, you're slowly glad you didn't answer. you're proud of yourself for being strong and doing what's best for you.
at least, you're glad until there's a banging at your door.
your mending heart regrets the moment you answer.
"steve?"
"you weren't answering," he pants, clutching the frame of your doorway, "i wanted to hear your voice."
"steve..." you sputter. "this isn't - it's-"
"i just miss you," he cuts you off. he looks so heartbroken, so sincere. he misses you. you try to not make anything more of it, but then he says it again, "i miss you so much."
you stand to the side, allowing him to pass, "come in."
"thank you," he sighs in relief.
"what happened?"
"the worst date of my life."
you swear you can feel your heart fracturing. the air feels like its being squeezed out of your lungs.
and still, you stand before him trying to look as unaffected as possible. you don't know how effective it is. you don't think he sees you enough to notice either way. "you were on a date?"
"it was awful. she was vapid and boring and - and pretentious - and - and she wasn't you."
you suck in a breath, "steve..."
these were words from a man who did not love you, from a man that did not count you. they sounded an awful lot like the love he claimed he didn't feel.
suddenly, he cups your face, standing too close to you. this wasn't what friends did. this isn't how friends treated each other. you know that.
and then he kisses you. soft and tenderly. his lips mold against yours perfectly. you swear it's a sigh of relief that leaves his mouth when you don't pull away.
you smile against his lips. a sense of rightness overtakes you. he overwhelms you. he consumes you. he grips your waist tightly. the other hand caressing your cheek.
"steve.." you sigh against his lips.
and he freezes. his hands drop as though you burned him. his lips slightly swollen and shining from the kiss. he wipes his mouth, "i should go."
you shake your head. you don't want to believe that this is happening right now. this is steve. the person you loved with every fiber of your being. your friend. you trusted him. you believed in him. he wouldn't hurt you like that. even if he didn't love you, even as just a friend, he wouldn't take advantage of your love for him like that. "what?"
"i should go."
and he leaves without another word.
your heart isn't just broken anymore, it's crumbled into a million little pieces. you're not sure you'll ever be able to fix it.
1 week ago...
he's blown past all your defenses. he's drained every ounce of strength from you. he's taken everything except your broken heart and your love for him. that's all that's left of you.
to know him is to love him. to know him is to be broken by him.
he calls and this time, you answer. you fear him coming back to your apartment like he did before. your heart couldn't take it anymore.
"hi, steve." your voice is so gravelly and hollow, a shell of the fullness and life it used to contain.
you noticed everything about him. his likes, his dislikes. you could tell the day he was having by the way he said hi, by the sort of smile he gave you. you're not sure why you just realized that it's not reciprocated at all. he once told you he loved the sound of your voice, how could he not hear the broken tone? if he notices, which you're sure he doesn't, he doesn't ask.
you can hear the smile in his voice, "i'm so glad you answered."
you're not even sure that he realizes you've put the phone down. after all, you're just his space filler.
now...
you don't know why you're surprised he showed up at your door again. you're not surprised that you opened the door. you're not surprised that you let him back into your home. you're not even surprised that he's talking to you like everything is normal.
the only thing that takes you by surprise is your unwillingness to hear about the misadventures of his dating life.
"steve," you try to interrupt.
"and all i want -"
"steve."
"is for someone to really hear me, to see -"
"steve." you're surprised by the harshness in your own voice. his eyes flash over to you, widened slightly in shock. "you - you have to go now."
his brow furrow, he's taken aback. it occurs to you that he has no idea what he's done wrong. "why?"
"you know why," you spit at him.
"no, you said you understood. you said we could still be friends."
"friends?" you bitterly chuckle. "friends don't hurt their friends over and over again."
"i don't understand."
"that's the problem, steve. you don't get it. you don't get that i don't want to hear about the girls you date. you don't get that it hurts hearing you talk about what you're looking for in a woman. it hurts when call me at the end of the night because you want to hear my voice."
"they why do you answer the phone?"
"because i love you!" you hopelessly exclaim. "because i’ll do anything for you. i’ll do anything you say. and i think you know that."
"am i just supposed to know that you didn’t want to hear about them?"
"no girl wants that," you whisper. "no one wants to hear about everything they don’t have."
"i don't understand what's happening here. you promised me that you would always be in my life!" his accusing tone offends you far more than it should.
a tear slips down your cheek. "that was before."
"before? before what?"
each word hurts. he really doesn't know. he doesn't think about you at all. not as a consideration. not as a woman. not even as just a friend. he doesn't see you at all. "i can do this anymore. it’s too hard. i can - i can’t keep letting you break my heart."
"i told you that i didn’t feel the same. you knew i wasn’t in a space to - to reciprocate."
"and then you kissed me!"
he stiffens at the kiss that he refused to mention. all those nights he spent on the phone with you, talking to you. it was the one thing he never spoke about. "i - i know that wasn’t right. and i’m sorry, okay? i’m sorry i did that. i was hurting."
"you were hurting?" your breaths come out in fragments, with each heave of your chest you can hear the whistle of emptiness where your heart used to reside. "you - you knew how i felt and you knew you didn’t feel the same and you kissed me anyway."
"it was a mistake. i'm sorry."
your hands ball up in frustration, tear burn at the corners of your eyes. "it’s not just about the kiss. it’s - it’s everything. it’s you. you won’t let me go. let me move on. please."
steve staggers back, "i don’t- i'm not trying to hold on to you."
"why did you call me the other night?"
"because you’re my friend. you’re the person i wanted to talk to. you understand. you always understand."
"i don’t. i don’t understand. it crushed me."
he reaches out for your hand. hurt flashes in his eyes when you snatch it out of his reach. you can't let him blind you this time. "you’re always there for me. even when no one else is, you are."
you snort, "you don’t even know what you did wrong, do you?"
"you’re my best friend. i just - i wanted you hear your voice."
"you see? you keep messing with my head. you tell me that i'm the person you want to talk to at the end of the night. you tell people that i'm your soulmate. you tell me that you don’t feel the same. i tell you i want to move on. you kiss me. then you go on a date with another girl. when it doesn’t work out, you call me. i'm done. i can’t do this anymore. loving you is breaking me far beyond repair."
"i do love you."
you fervently shake your head over and over again, "you don’t mean that."
"i love you and i know it’s not in the same way but maybe - just give me time."
"time isn’t going to fix this. you don’t love me. you love the way i make you feel. you love being loved."
he scoffs, shooting a glare at you, "that’s not fair."
"no, it’s not," you agree. "and it’s not fair that you know how i feel and yet you just keep hurting me. you do it over and over again. and i keep letting you."
steve reaches for you again, "we can fix this."
you shake him off, striding to your door, opening it for him, "you should go."
"please," steve begs.
"goodbye, steve."
you don't know how you gather the strength to close the door on the man you love more than anything, let alone the man begging to stay in your life. the door clicks shut behind him.
a choked sob escapes your mouth as tears freely fall.
to know him is to love him, and you don't want to know a thing about steve rogers anymore.
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punkbarnes2 · 1 year
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Trying some chibi and some textures 🥺🥺
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dandelionxbby · 1 month
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how I feel whenever someone reblogs my post and leaves rant tags
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oopspeter · 8 months
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We'll never have sex
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SUMMARY: Returning from a year long mission should be a relief, but the terrors from those hard months have followed you back home. Struggling to find comfort in your old ways, a certain co-worker introduces you to his own salvation-- distraction.
WARNINGS: 16+ rating for mature themes, blood, allusions to torture, foul language, minor to medium injury descriptions, weapons and violence.
WC: 3.6K
NOTES: First fic! Please let me know what you think-- it hasn't been proofread very well.
"Are you taller than the last time I saw you?" You tease, in awe of his largely built physique.
"I guess everything finally loosened after being off of the ice for so long," Bucky says rather non-chalant.
"Has the giant stick finally fallen out of your ass then?" You quip with a cheeky grin.
"Never," he shakes his head with an equally matched smile.
"And decided to evolve from that 'lord and saviour' haircut?" You motion to his new trim.
"I've decided that look only suits the holiest of men, which of course I don't qualify for," he instinctively runs his fingers through the chopped locks.
The sound of a heavy heel echoes on the polished concrete, a grand entrance for the one and only Tony Stark.
"Hermit and the recluse!" His hands spread out like an awful gesture of welcome.
"I thought you were too old for modern hip-hop references, Anthony," you push your lips into a thin line, refusing to give him the satisfaction.
"Puh-lease, as if gramps here even knows what I'm yapping about," Tony points his thumb over his shoulder at Bucky as he walks past.
Even though he was totally right, Bucky also refrained from producing any sort of a reaction.
"Here to spread anything useful or are you just trying to be a dick?" Your current distaste for the playboy was evident in your tone, but it was nothing new. Deep down inside you did feel a sense of protectiveness towards him, as did he to you.
Opening the large, stainless steel refrigerator that looked like it could hold at least six months worth of food at a single time, he snatched a bottle of lemon water before slamming the door shut again.
"Since you're back, Banner wants to do a few procedural run throughs just to check up on your health," he flicks the cap off of the bottle which goes flying into the bin. "Oh, and the Star Spangled Banner would like to see you as well-- not the Bruce Banner, but the Star Spangled one."
"You can just say Steve, you know that right?" You squint at him as he daintily sips from the mouthpiece of the bottle.
"Just proving my vocabulary has extended further than the most generic white-man name in America," he shrugs coolly, and you kinda' wanna punch him in his smug face.
The ex-soldier stands as still as stone beside you during your exchange with Tony, if you couldn't see the gentle rise and fall of his chest you'd think he was dead with the lack of noise emitting. Choosing to ignore him, the man takes the cue to leave the room, still feverishly sipping the bottle of lemony water. Once the sound of his heavy heels disappeared out of the kitchen and down the hallway, you noticed how Bucky's shoulders relax.
"Bet you're dreading being back, huh?" You allow to corner of your mouth to turn upwards slightly.
"I could say the same thing to you."
There's an unspoken tension in the air, something far from awkward but not any nearer to comfortable either. Had it been a year and a half since you last saw him? On his six month mission to Angola, at the fourth month you had been sent off on a mission of your own in the Pacific islands to track down an old HYDRA associate who had formulated a plan to obliterate the entire planet from his tiny laboratory in the middle of bum-fuck no where.. no biggie, right?
The seemingly short mission of yours turned into a solo, twelve month exhibition trying to chase a man who was half the size of yourself and almost as clever. Eventually when you caught up to him and the few friends he had made along the way, the year job was over in thirty seconds. Underwhelming.
Sure, you’d escaped death a few times, but not by the man who you’d been hunting. Turns out there were a few other undesirables along your path that you just couldn’t miss the opportunity to lock up. Maybe that was a bit of a roadblock, too.
“I don’t want to keep Bruce waiting, I’ll uh.. see you later?” It was a hopeful question.
“Certainly,” he nods his head in reply, and your heart skips a beat or two.
You blame the heart issues on being so emotionally disconnected from anyone for the past twelve months.
The appointment with Bruce was swift, you chat for more of the time than you did actually doing the check up. He prescribed you with a few pain meds, re-dressed some wounds you’d brought back with you and altered your fitness plan to better accommodate your new injuries. Bruce had a way when it came to making people feel safe, despite the fact any moment a big green monster could jump out and crush you.
There were the usual questions like, how has your diet been-- have you been getting enough sleep-- are the night terrors still occurring-- any unusual pains-- are you sexually active?
The answer has always been something along the lines of nutritious, not at all, all of the time, plenty and no.
It's hard to maintain a sex life being away all the time and locking yourself in your room when you are around, even harder trying to manage a relationship. Sure, you've dated before, dabbled in a love life or two before inevitably deciding it wasn't for you. It never will be for you.
It's far past nightfall by the time you actually decide to leave your room, walking barefoot through the long, cold halls of the tower before finding yourself in the kitchen. Your stomach growls to protest your hunger, throat scratchy and dry as symptoms of your thirst. The automatic lights flicker on the moment you walk through the threshold into the kitchen. A pristine, clean kitchen soon to become the next victim of your horrific cooking skills.
First of all you grab a glass from it's respective cabinet, running the water from the tap to fill it up. Your lips meet the mouth of the glass and you drink, quenching your thirst with a relieved sigh. The water here is refreshing, hygienic, in great contrast to what you've been drinking for the past year. Feeling the coolness in your palms you go to take another sip.
It's metallic, tastes like you've drunk straight from a muddy puddle. The water they have just thrown on your face definitely mixed with the blood dripping from your nose and clinging to your lips. Coughing up a mix of flehm and mucky water, you thrash around in the flimsy wooden chair you've been restrained to.
The room smells of mildew, wet dog fur, and something that is heavily rotting. You can blame the stink of decomposition on whatever is beneath that blue tarp tucked away in the far corner of the room. There's no light aside from a single bulb eerily hanging above your head like some old, cliché horror movie.
Your wrists hurt more than usual and this time you can't blame it on early on-set arthritis, but instead the finger-marks imprinted in a purplish green and the thick rope that rubs against them. The silhouette hiding in the dark approaches you in the light, the indistinguishable appearance morphing into that of a tall man with a mask that hid his face and resembled a smiling monkey. It would be the least menacing thing in the room if he wasn't wielding a knife as large as your forearm.
It's silent aside from the obnoxious drip from the ceiling on the tarp. Drip. Drip. Drip. The face of the knife shines in your eye, reflecting from the light of the bulb hanging from the ceiling. His feet drag along the crusty floor, it's evident he has a limp by the way he carries himself towards you. If you had a free leg or two you'd drive your foot straight into his knee to completely eliminate that problem for him, forever; but how tightly they had bound you prevented even a nudge of movement.
The masked man is close enough for your knees to touch, taking the tip of the sharp knife and dragging it across your cheek to leave a light mark that brings blood in it's wake. You refuse to give him the satisfaction of even a slight whimper which evidentially leaves him unsatisfied, because the knife leaves your face and dives into your--
"Hey, are you okay?"
The glass in your hand shatters completely, hundreds of shards diving and piercing the skin on your palm, the water that was left now drenching your socks. Were you holding it so tightly that the sudden fright made it break?
Swinging around with a crimson hand you find an equally shocked Bucky, lips slightly ajar as a physical indication of his surprise. Not even a moment later he's rushing over with a dishtowel to wrap around your bleeding hand, the white terry cloth quickly becoming stained. You can tell he's panicked by the rise and fall of his shoulders, yet you are struggling to even breathe.
The rotting and mildew is replaced by lemon disinfectant and lingering cooked onion. A dark, dank room now replaced by a pristine, white kitchen. The man in front of you is not a man who wears the mask of a monkey, but instead the one and only Bucky Barnes.
"Fuck, fuck," he has the towel wrapped so tightly around your palm. "We need Banner--"
"No!" You interrupt him, finally finding your own voice. "I don't want to wake him, please don't disturb him."
"Then what do I do?" You can tell he is trying his best to keep his composure and not snap at you for being so stubborn like he has so many times before.
"Get the kit from under the sink, wait for the bleeding to calm and I can take the remaining shards out of my hand," you instruct.
"I will take the remaining shards out of your hand," he corrects. "Keep pressure on it please."
His callous hand places your other hand on top of the towel, pushing the back of it down to apply the same pressure he was before. He's rushing to grab the kit from beneath the kitchen sink, taking his hand to shove all of the bleach bottles aside instead of carefully rummaging through.
You've already made your way to the island, taking a seat at the bar stool and leaning your elbow against the marble. It fucking stings. You have no idea how you transported all the way back into the room after shoving the memory so far down to the depths where you thought it could never recover.
You take in his evening look, those baggy grey sweatpants a signature at-home look of his. The creased t-shirt a dark navy and border lining a compression tee from the way it hugs his torso and biceps so tightly. There are bags under his eyes like there always is, and his brows are pulled tightly together in deep concern.
Your heart does that concerning thing again. Perhaps the bloodloss?
He stands beside you at the end of the counter, the fine marble a slight barrier between your bodies. He unzips the kit with such force you're surprised the entire thing hasn't ripped. He's panicked, you can tell.
"Hey," your uninjured hand reaches out to lightly touch your wrist. "Breathe, it's okay, I'm not dying."
Bucky pauses, and he isn't breathing-- until he does. His tense shoulders drop and his face finally relaxes, then he moves your hand back to apply pressure to the towel.
The silence between you is intense and lasts for what feels like forever. You can tell there's a question on the tip of his tongue that he's too afraid to ask, and you've got a feeling you're not quite sure how to answer it either why. You're not sure why you broke the glass, or why you became absent for so long, or why you were back in that room again.
"Why are you awake?" He interrupts your escape into your own head.
"I couldn't sleep," you answer honestly. "Neither could you?"
Bucky shakes his head in reply. "No, I couldn't."
"Never can." You both say in unison.
There's a pause.
"I'm sorry for scaring you," he doesn't look you in the eyes, instead stares at the red cloth covering your hand.
"You didn't mean to," you shake your head with reassurance, offering a small smile to show that you aren't upset with him at all.
"What if I did?" The corner of his lip upturns.
"Then we'd have a bit of a problem, wouldn't we?" Your tone is playful.
"How about we leave the sparring for after, when all of the glass is out of your hand y'know," he shrugs jokingly.
"Right," you nod your head in agreeance, pulling the towel back to reveal the palm of your hand.
It's definitely not the prettiest thing you've ever seen, but not the worst either. There's only one significantly deep cut but the rest just brushed the surface few layers of skin. Bucky is quick to get to work with the tweezers, disinfectant and plasters.
As he works on mending your hand you can't help but look at his face.
Compared to the last time you saw him there's a scar or two more on his right cheekbone, a significant healed slash across the bridge of his nose, a few extra wrinkles in the corner of his eyes. The stubble on his jaw, chin and upper lip is well maintained and lacks intensity on his neck. The cropped look suits him, hints of grey coming through as a reminder of his aging body now that he has been off the all the chemicals and the ice.
Your eyes trace his side profile, from his hairline to his forehead, eyebrows to the tip of his nose, nose to his lips, lips to his chin and then back to his lips. They're pursed as a habit of concentration, blue eyes trained on the task at hand (literally).
Though it stings, it's practically painless with the way he leans into the counter to reach you. Your heart is skipping again, but this time you think you know why.
"Done," he claps his hands together. "I definitely recommend seeing Banner tomorrow though, even though I spend my weekends fixing myself up I sure as hell ain't a doctor."
"You did a mighty fine job anyways, Mr Barnes," you admire his handy work, though you definitely need that deeper cut a proper look at tomorrow. It'll definitely stop the bleeding and keep it all together for the meantime.
The tension resumes it's place between you, it's palpable.
Your stomach growls in the quiet room.
"Are you hungry?" He quirks a brow.
"Yeah, I was initially in here to cook," you nod your head and rub your forearm with your uninjured hand sheepishly. "Kinda' foiled now." You wave your now bandaged hand.
"Can I take you somewhere?" He's polite, and looks at you like an expectant puppy. You can't help but grin.
"Sure."
It’s a stones throw, or two, from the tower before you finally arrive at your destination. The roaring of his motorbike falls to silence as he uses his heel to push out the kickstand, leaning the bike on it and throwing his leg over to hop off. Reaching his hand out he offers to help you down, which you gracefully accept, placing your hand in the palm of his own and jumping out of your seat.
Dinner was gorgeous. Some little, family owned, Thai place hidden in Brooklyn, where the women knew Bucky’s name and the men shook his hand. They presented you both with a free entrée. It sure as hell made you forget about that little episode in the kitchen. The second the food met your tongue you practically melted into your seat, and Bucky laughed as if to say ‘I know, right!’
Conversation flowed easily, any moment of silent was just a cause of food being stuffed into your mouths. He didn’t ask why you couldn’t sleep, or why you were in such a state and broke the glass. Bucky knew you’d tell him when you were ready.
A shared plate of Khao Niew Ma Maung and a more than generous tip later, you find yourself standing outside of the door to your room. Laughter echoes down the empty, dimly lit hall as you keep at least a foot between you— not daring to even brush arms. His strong featured are illuminated by the shadows, and that funny feeling rests heavily in your chest.
There’s a blanket of silence that falls between you two, not wanting this quiet moment to end. You can see the gentle rise and fall of his chest, and if the super soldier hearing was true he’d definitely be able to hear the heavy beat of your heart.
“Thank you,” you break the silence. “I— tonight was lovely.”
Bucky hums. “It was.”
Neither of you move a muscle, an invitation lingering on the tip of your tongue.
You open your mouth to speak. “Do you—”
“Yes, please.”
Inside your room is sweet, the bed is made with the cosiest of sheets, books stack shelves accompanied by little trinkets you display proudly. Flicking a match you ignite your pumpkin-scented candle for a source of light, the blinds already automatically pulled down on the floor-to-ceiling windows. If the crisp, untouched sheets were not enough of a sign that you couldn’t find rest, perhaps the growing bags under your eyes were.
Respectfully he kicks his shoes off at the door before stepping on your plush carpet, shrugging off his own jacket and neatly placing it on the back of your desk chair. He’s never been in your room, no one has besides Banner who stumbled in panicked to find you a shaking mess on the floor. That’s a story for another time.
You lay on top the bedspread and rest your head on the plush pillow, hands intertwining on your stomach as you stare at the ceiling. Letting out a gentle sigh you feel the mattress dip to the right of your feet.
“You can lay with me, don’t be shy.”
He’s hesitant to do so, but you can feel the warmth of his body as he lays parallel to yourself. You can smell his cologne and it’s much nicer than your expensive candle.
“I like what you’ve done with the place,” he motions with his hand that you can see in your peripherals.
“You thought I’d be happy with the Stark furniture they so kindly gifted us all when we first moved in?” You put a certain emphasis on the word, which causes him to chuckle. The bed shakes under his weight, and the butterflies flutter.
“I think I broke the bed frame on the third day,” he shuffles beside you, you can tell there’s a smile on his face that matches yours.
“Holy shit, who did you do?”
“No— no— not from that!” He’s quick to jump in and defend himself, evidently flustered. “Turns out the billionaire couldn’t spare the few extra dollars to buy something that could hold 260lbs.”
“So what, you were just sleeping and it collapsed beneath you?” You turn your head slightly to glance at his face.
“I mean I kinda’ face planted on it after I got home from a frustrating mission, and it just splintered beneath me.”
“Oh god,” you cover your mouth with your hand to stifle a giggle. “I would’ve paid to see that.”
“I was pissed,” he shakes his head, turning it slightly to look into your eyes. “I stormed through the complex and kicked open Stark’s door.”
“Did you get a new bed frame?”
“No, my mattress is still on the floor.”
“I think you need to make another complaint to head office then.”
“You bet,” he shakes his head with a heavy sigh, but the upturn of his mouth tells you that it’s the least of his worries right now.
There’s a certain tension in the air as his cerulean eyes drown in your own, nothing but the crackling of the candle wick and your combined breaths filling the void.
“Thank you, for taking me out tonight,” your eyes trace his jaw to his lips before flicking back to his own. “I—I wasn’t doing too well.”
“I know,” he nods his head in understanding. “I should be thanking you, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Mrs Nguyen so happy to see me walk through that door with someone other than myself.”
“Is that why she’d check on our table every five minutes despite the fact we were the only people dining there?”
He chuckles, running his hand through his chopped hair. “Seems so.”
For the first time in a very long time, you feel your lids getting heavy as your body sinks further into the mattress. There’s a warmth rather than that awful cool you feel so often, and it’s starting to become a challenge to keep your eyes open.
After what feels like an eternity of struggle you lift your head slightly to notice how Bucky’s lashes now rest on his cheeks, lips parted to let out quiet breaths. And suddenly in this moment you are safe, and everything is okay.
Your lips meet his forehead in a soft, gentle kiss. “Thank you.” Before you rest your head a little closer to his own and fall into a sleep you’d been praying for.
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xcaptain-winterx · 9 months
Note
Plz plz plz make part 2 of the Steve rogers x Recuit reader🙏🥺
Be a man
Steve Rogers x reader
summary: Steve is a burned chicken nugget
warnings: awkwardness, Bucky being a wingman, angst, fluff, flu, shy Steve, no cum
a/n: English is not my first language, meaning you will probably find a lot of misspelling etc. I think I did a lot of mistakes in this fic
Part 1 Part 3
Main Masterlist Steve Rogers Masterlist
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“How is he doing?” Sam asks as Bucky steps out of Steve’s bathroom.
“You mean because of how he embarrassed himself in front of his girl or because of the fact that he swallowed his own cum?”. Bucky leans against the wall next to Sam.
If Steve wasn’t feeling that bad and if he hadn’t witnessed, the whole thing in front of him, Sam would have laughed at the mere fact that Bucky used swallowed and cum in the same sentence. He would’ve never thought that Steve would do this kind of thing. He thought Bucky would do that to be honest, and on purpose.
“Both”.
“Not good, not in the slightest. Probably won’t ever come out of his room again. Can’t blame him though” Bucky says, giving Sam a sad smile, “I would have changed my name and moved states if that happened to me, and faked my own death for my new identity”.
Sam gives him the side eye, “sounds like you already planned this whole ‘if’ situation. Sometimes you really fucking scare me, Gandalf”.
Now it’s Buckys turn to give Sam the side eye, “Don’t call me that”.
“Why?”
“I’m not like him in the slightest?”
“Yeah, old, wrinkly, gray hair, bad posture, looking lost all the time, long hair, packed, greasy-“
“I’m not greasy, bird brain, and what do you mean with packed?”
Sam thinks for a second; he’s been waiting for this opportunity for a long time. “It means good, very good”. He can’t wait to tell Tony what he did.
Bucky turns to Sam, “so you think I’m a good guy?”.
“Definitely, a very packed guy” Sam says nodding, hiding his smug smile. He doesn’t miss the small happy expression that crosses Bucky’s face. Just as Bucky is about to say something, they hear Steve emptying his stomach again. Bucky curses and rushes into the bathroom to Steve.
He rubs Steve’s back while he is throwing up, exactly like he did back in the old days. Back when everything near Steve could make him sick.
Once he emptied his stomach, Bucky fills him a glass of water and sits down next to him on the bathroom floor. Steve’s eyes are red and teary and face pale as a ghost. He gives him a faint nod as Bucky gives him the glass.
“Slow sips” Bucky says, helping him holding the glass du to him shaking. Once Steve is done, he gives Bucky a small thanks and rests his head against the wall.
It’s silent now, no voice that echoes through the bathroom. You can only hear the faint sound of Sam’s foot tapping the floor outside the bathroom. Bucky is the first to break the silence.
“What are you feeling?”
Steve scoffs, and Bucky swears he can see his eyes water for a second. “I feel like an idiot” Steve says.
“What do you mean?” Bucky asks, helping Steve as he tries to get up. Steve looks deep into Bucky’s eyes when he finally stands. Bucky can see the clear pain in his eyes. Not only pain, but complete exhaustion.
“I was an idiot for thinking I actually had a chance with her” he whispers before pushing Bucky’s hand off him and walks out of the bathroom.
Sam was in with a confused expression, questioning what they talked about because Steve just walked away. Normally Steve is the last person to walk away from a conversation with his Bucky. He won’t say best friend because he’s obviously Steve’s best friend. 100%.
“What happened?” Sam finally asks.
“Get your running shoes” Bucky says, not giving Sam a single glance as he walks out. He leaves an even more confused Sam behind.
“Running shoes?”
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Two days passes in which Steve didn’t leave his room ones. In that time Bucky had to bring Steve some food because he wouldn’t even leave his room for that. Bucky didn’t care about Steve’s reasoning that he’s a super soldier and can go days without eating. It may be true, but there is no way in hell that Bucky would let Steve ‘starve’ himself. Bucky’s mom would be proud of him for still taking care of poor Steve.
Steve appreciated Bucky for taking care of him, even though he told him to stop. He just wanted to be alone under his bedsheets, wishing he was dead.
Somehow, Steve managed to get sick. Steve, the super soldier Rogers, got sick.
It took Bucky every strength to get Steve to agree to put on some pants and go see the medic. Now he’s helping Steve walk to the med. Knowing Steve isn’t a big fan of people seeing him in such a state, especially someone specific, they take the stairs instead of the elevator.
“Sit down, pal” Bucky says, walking to the examination bed and helping him up and making sure that Steve is comfortable. Just as Steve is up on it, Bucky’s phone starts to rink.
“Hello?” Bucky asks, picking up the phone quite fast. Steve stares at Bucky, trying to listen to who it is. He’s been in his room for days, not doing anything. Seeing Bucky talking to someone on the phone is the most exciting thing he has seen in days.
“Alright” Bucky hangs up. “I need to go”
“What?”
“Sam is in trouble”
“And he called you?” Steve asks
“No, security did”
“…..what?”
“I need to go, Steve. I will come back later”
“Wait wait wait, no!” Steve begs, grabbing Bucky’s hand as he stands up “don’t leave me alone. I can’t do this without you”. Steve gives Bucky his best puppy eyes.
“It’s just the doctor, Steve”
“But what if-“ Steve gets cut off by Bucky.
“I really need to go, Steve. The faster I go the faster I will be back” he says walking out, giving no room for Steve to say something.
Steve is now alone in the med, waiting for the doctor. Hopefully Bruce.
He tries to calm his breathing, telling himself that everything is ok, that she isn’t here, then Banner will soon be here. You’re not a medic or something close to-
“Hello, Mr Rogers”
God, please no
“I heard you aren’t doing that good. What’s wrong”
No, no no no
“Mr Rogers?” you ask, putting on some gloves.
Steve snaps back to reality as you touch his shoulder. Even through the glove, he can feel the warmth of your fingers. There’s nothing more he would rather have than hold your hand in his. He imagines how he holds your hand while dancing to some soft music, any kind of music. Steve would even dance with you to heavy metal if that’s your favorite music. “Hello”.
“Hi” you say smiling at him. “How are you feeling?”.
“I uhm…I’m tired, my eyes are burning sometimes and I feel like a burned chicken nugget” Steve says. He remembers how one’s Sam told him that ‘burned chicken nugget’ means feeling warm.
Steve looks up at you and gives you a small smile. He is trying his best not to cry because of nervousness.
“A burned chicken nugget?” you ask, chuckling.
Steve blushes “y-yeah”. Hearing your sweat laugh makes him turn bright red. He just hopes you don’t notice. You likely will, though.
“Well, isn’t that a unique description” you say while writing down his symptoms. After writing it down, you take a thermometer and turn back to Steve, “please open your mouth, Mr Rogers”.
Steve does as he’s told, and you put the thermometer in his mouth. Steve uses the moment where you are not looking to take you in fully. The lab coat really suits you, so does your small bumblebee patch on the front pocket of the coat. Not only does your outfit make his heart beat faster but also your eyes. You are wearing something Steve believes to be called mascara. At least, that is what Natasha told him a few months ago, as he had to wait for her to finish her makeup before a mission.
Soon a beep tone comes from the thermometer, and you take it out of his mouth. You looked at the thermometer shocked “oh, you are hot”
“So are you” Steve says without thinking.
“What?” you surely misheard him.
“What?” Steve wants to throw himself out the window. The silence between you two screams that this is awkward. Thankfully, you just drop it and instead take your glove off and place your hand on Steve’s forehead. He’s burning up.
“I think we should perhaps draw some blood, Captain” you walk to grab everything you need while Steve already rolls his sleeve up. Only problem is that he’s wearing a sweatshirt, despite feeling like he’s on fire, and he can’t roll it far enough up. You see that and say “perhaps you should remove your sweatshirt”.
Steve is dying on the inside. The hesitation is clear on his face and you notice that.
“I mean you don’t have to, but I won’t be able to draw some blood”
You know that it’s important to draw some blood, especially from him, because a normal person would be close to dying with his temperature. He most likely isn’t because of the serum, so you aren’t panicking that much, but he is still suffering.
Steve can hear the concern as you speak and knows it’s important to draw some blood. He needs to just be a man for ones and jump over the shadow of little twink Steve. With that he takes his sweatshirt off, revealing his sweat covered bare upper body.
You stare at his chest for a bit, checking out his almost shining muscle, while making a ‘damn boy’ expression.
Steve can’t tell if you’re judging his body or if you think he looks good. He hopes you think he looks good. He stops breathing as you take your eyes off of him and prepare to draw some blood.
“Are you nervous?” you ask, immediately wanting to slap yourself as you realize you asked freaking Captain America if he’s scared of needles. “Sorry, obviously you aren’t”.
Steve chuckles. “They are nothing new to me. Had to get them a lot when I was smaller”.
“You got sick a lot?”
“All the time. I was the sick kid back then. This is the first I’ve been sick in seventy years”
“Well then, we better make sure you get better soon” you say preparing the needle. Even though Steve is not scared you still try to distract him from the needle “I heard you sketched a lot. A true artist”.
Steve smiles at that….until he realizes that you know a thing that he almost no one knows. It’s true that he likes to sketch and draw, but he does that when he’s alone. There is no way you could know that.
While Steve questions how you could possibly know that, you start to slowly push the needle into his skin. He comes back to reality when he feels your hand touch his bare arm. Surprisingly, he’s not getting hard.
He still puts a hand over his area, just to make sure.
“Yeah, I uhm did- still do”
“What do you sketch?”
“Buildings, the nature, animals, just beautiful stuff in general” he says, not telling you that you are currently his number one thing to sketch. Steve doesn’t need to see you to sketch you. You are constantly in his head, every detail of your face is tattooed in his brain.
“I always love to paint sunsets” you say.
“You paint?” he asks, kind of surprised, but also excited.
“Yeah, I used to go to art classes when I was a teenager” you say smiling, carefully pulling out the needle.
“I did too”
“Seems like we have something in common” you say, looking up at him and giving him smile.
“I guess we do” Steve says, looking down at his lap, blushing even more. As his eyes move back up, something yellow caught his eyes.
A bright yellow bumblebee bandage.
You notice him looking at his arm. “Oh, I uhm-I don’t know where the other bandages are and I always carry those with me. I know they aren’t exactly what people above the age of ten prefer, but I like to say they bring luck” you say, not looking him in the eyes. It’s at that moment that Steve realizes that he never liked someone as much as you. “I’m sorry if you don’t like it, but Dr Banner didn’t tell me where they are before he left”
“Left?” Steve asks.
“With agent Romanoff. I believe she told me they were going to Norway”.
He definitely missed a lot during his depressive episode.
“You are done” you say, giving him his sweatshirt. “The results will come in tomorrow. I will inform you once they are here, Captain. Till then I can give you something that can perhaps help you, at lest for tonight”.
Steve nods, putting his sweatshirt back on “t-thanks”
“It’s my job, Captain Rogers” you say, looking at him with a smile that he can only describe as the smile of an angel, filling his body with a warmth that he never felt before.
“I-I know, but still” Steve says, looking you deep into the eyes. He takes a deep breath. This may be his chance. “Perhaps I could repay you. W-would you like to go-“
The door slams open and Tony fucking Stark walks in.
Oh, how much he wants to throw Tony out of the window just now.
Tony stares at the both of you, raising a brow, continuing his search for something. “Am I interrupting something?” he asks.
“No, Mr Stark”
“Yes, Tony”
You look at Steve, while he stares at the floor. He feels so embarrassed as he realizes what he said. It doesn’t make it better that Tony stopped walking and is now staring at him too.
“Damn Rogers, didn’t know you-“
Steve slams the doors open and storms out. This is even more embarrassing than as he swallowed his own cum in front of you. Everything was going great. He was talking to you without stuttering like a complete idiot. He managed to not get hard while you touched him. You both were talking about something you have in common.
He wishes Banner would have checked him up, then he wouldn’t have embarrassed himself like that. Why did he have to be sick the one time Banner isn’t there? Why didn’t Bucky tell him that Banner wasn’t-.
Steve stops walking as he realizes.
“You are fucking dead, Barnes”
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tag: @purple-ash27 @catluv3rrr @james-bb-1917 @bitchy-bi-trash
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sassypossumm · 2 months
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Waffles and Sex
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"And if I want you to bend me over the counter and fuck me senseless before those waffles?" Also known as, the morning after your first time with Steve Rogers...
I know, I know, I already posted this in two parts for Miguel O'Hara, but it was too good not to share with my other husband, Steve Rogers. (18+) fluff and smut.
The morning after your first night together, you'd roused with a sleepy smile when you felt the solid warm chest of the man behind you. Sighing contentedly, you'd closed your eyes and wriggled further into his warmth.
"Awake?" His voice rough with sleep rumbled low as he nuzzled your ear. You squirmed a bit at the ticklish sensation and hummed. Steve wrapped his arm tighter around your waist, dragging you even closer. You'd been just on the edge of falling back asleep, when his fingers trailed suggestively down your thigh.
"Steve..." You whined sleepily when his hand slid between your thighs to cup your pussy. He simply nuzzled your ear and ghosted a kiss into the curve of your neck.
"Shh, you did so much last night, just relax." You were lulled back into that hazy space between wakefulness and sleep when he began lazily rubbing his middle and ring fingers on either side of your clit, teasing the sensitive area. Groaning, you rocked back into him. It wasn't helping that the palm of his hand was inadvertently applying pressure to your entrance that was growing wetter by the minute.
"You call this relaxing?" You groused, some of the effect being lost with the breathy quality of your voice. Steve grinned and buried his face in your hair. He caught the faint scent of apples and groaned when his cock twitched against your perfectly rounded backside.
It had been a long time since Steve had any woman in his bed, and as you whined and grumbled, he was struggling to imagine any other at this point.
He was pussy whipped after only one night, and he knew it.
It was growing more difficult to ignore how his hardening cock felt as your hips grinded back into his. Steve groaned and pulled his hand away from your pussy to grip your hip, stilling your motions. Huffing, you turned your head to glare at him. Steve's eyes creased as he smiled at you warmly.
"Has anyone ever told you how adorable you are when you're angry?" He chuckled, squeezing your thigh teasingly.
"Yes." You huffed again, and rolled onto your back, folding your arms. Propping himself up on his elbow, Steve teased your soft inner thigh with a finger.
"Don't be angry, angel." Your eyes darted to his face, and you felt yourself caving to his deep, pleading eyes.
"I... might be persuaded..." Turning your head, you stared at the ceiling petulantly. Steve bit back another chuckle at your antics and hummed thoughtfully.
"My best friend claims my pancakes are legendary." He coaxes, ghosting his fingers over your stomach. You suck in a breath and your muscles go taught at the sensation.
"I prefer waffles, pancakes make me feel like I'm suffocating."
"I can make waffles." He says quietly, dipping down to kiss the hollow of your throat. Against your best efforts, a whimper escapes your lips, and you tangle your fingers in his golden-brown hair. Steve smiles against your skin and sucks at your pulse before nosing at your ear again. Turning your face, your nose brushes against his.
"And if I want you to bend me over the counter and fuck me senseless before those waffles?" You whisper coyly, trailing your hand down his stomach and towards the waist band of his boxers. Steve catches your fingers and brings them to his lips, and stares at you through half lidded eyes.
"You only have to ask, baby doll."
And thus, that simple conversation led to you leaning over Steve's kitchen counter, drooling into the grout as his cock all but split you in two from behind.
"So tight..." He grunted, tightening his grip on your hips as he pulled your hips back to meet his thrusts. His heart melted at your breathless murmurings, and he slowed his thrusts to sensually roll his hips into yours. Leaning over your back, he laced his fingers through yours and pressed open mouth kisses down your neck.
Driving his cock deeper, he groaned at the way your walls clamped around him, fighting to keep him trapped as he pulled out slowly, only to slide back in at an agonizingly slow pace.
You gripped his hands and moaned as the veins along his cock grazed your sensitive walls. With the way he was grinding slowly into you, the base of his cock ground into your overstimulated bundle of nerves with delicious friction. A tingle slithered down your spine and tightened in your pelvic floor.
"Steven..." You whimpered, burying your face in the crook of your arm.
"Shh, baby doll, I've got you." Steve murmured in your ear, picking up his pace again and freed one of his hands to grope at your breast through his shirt. Burying his face in your hair, he breathed deeply, relishing the way the scents of your arousal and his own natural musk blended so harmoniously.
Cupping your breast through the fabric, he growled low in his throat as he plucked at your nipple and drove into you with renewed vigor. His taught abdomen brushed your lower back with every thrust as he leaned back to grip your hips, determined to drive you both to completion.
You tried to reach between your legs to rub at your clit, but Steve bat your hand away with a growl. You opened your mouth to whine, but cried out when his rough fingers began massaging to small nub expertly. Your murmurings devolved into inarticulate mewling.
Feeling his balls tighten and his cock twitch, Steve leaned over you again as his pace slowed and he nipped at your ear.
"You looked so pretty last night with your lips around my cock, angel." Your breath caught as he sucked at your thrumming pulse. "Then when you came... shit... pure rapture." Your brain scrambled into static at the words rolling off his tongue, and your body trembled at his deep husky tone.
Who'd have guessed Steve Rogers would be not only the best shag you'd had in a long time, but also the sexiest dirtiest talker you'd encountered.
"Gonna cum for me again, Y/N?" His honeyed tone, and the way his tongue darted out to tease your jawline tipped you over the edge, warmth overwhelmed you as you groaned and gripped his hand for all you were worth. Steve followed not long after, biting your shoulder lightly as his cock twitched and rope after rope of his seed painted your fluttering walls.
Coming down from your high, you were vaguely aware of him pulling out of you, followed by the sensation of a damp cloth between your legs.
"You did so well, Y/N." Stev murmured, nuzzling your ear and kissing your neck as he gently cleaned your folds. Leaning back into him you rested against his solid body and looked up into his warm blue eye. He smiled softly, eyes creasing at the corners and leaned down to kiss your nose. "Ready for those waffles?"
In that moment you knew, Steve Rogers was going to be so much more than a good shag.
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Note
you already know what i’m gonna ask for lol. i need my airport man my love. what do you think would’ve happened if he asked me for my number instead of WALKING AWAY or if i magically found him in duty free. BETTER YET what if he just happened to be on the same flight as me?
let’s pretend airport man is steve rogers please. the blonde and that accent gives steve vibes.
Need A Hand? - 1
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PAIRINGS: Steve Rogers x Reader
SUMMARY: Flying back to Washington for a family event, you were already ready for it to be over in a week. You didn't want to face the comments from your family about your life as a single working woman. But what happens when you walk into the event accompanied by the stranger you sat next to on the plane? What if that stranger isn't really a stranger?
WARNINGS: Swearing, comments about loneliness from family members, a creepy guy
WORD COUNT: 1,877
ENJOY!
You knew the coffee was cold before the liquid hit your tongue, but you still needed the caffeine. Tipping your head back, you downed the whole thing quickly.
Wincing at the bitter taste, you threw the cardboard cup in the nearest trash can. You knew a 2am flight wouldn’t be the best experience, but you were not going to drive all the way.
You were on the last available flight. You knew your dumbass should’ve booked an earlier ticket, but can you really blame yourself? It’s the middle of December, and people are being stuffed onto planes, wanting to get back to their families for Christmas.
You?
You didn’t want to visit Washington; you had already built your life in the city.
Your family was shocked when you finally revealed you got the position as a Data Analyst at Stark Industries; however, they were even more shocked at your urgency to move ASAP.
They didn’t know that the reason you moved to NYC was because you wanted to leave the nagging and constant subtle unwanted comments behind. It would’ve been one month since you last visited home for Thanksgiving, which didn’t turn out great either; your grandmother made comments on how you didn’t have a man yet.
Rolling your carry-on behind you with one hand, you adjusted the backpack hanging off your shoulders with the other. Your eyes scanned the large gate numbers in hopes of finding the right one.
GATE 23.
You sighed and started heading in the direction of your gate. When you did find a seat in the plethora of people, you called dibs with your eyes and sat down, scrolling mindlessly on social media for the next half an hour.
-------
The aisle seat was somewhat ideal; economy wasn’t the best, but it was something you had to deal with for the next three hours. The man next to you had already started becoming a problem. He started small talk, and you gave in for a while.
“Going to see family?” he asked, looking at you with a wide grin.
You returned a pursed smile, not really wanting to interact with strangers this early in the morning.
 “Yeah, family stuff,” you replied, securing your seatbelt and tightening it to fit your waist.
The questions were normal until the man started getting personal. “Got a boyfriend?” he smiled sleazily, and you cringed on the inside.
You fake smiled and replied, “no.” He nodded and gave you a weird smirk. “Why? You’re a gorgeous thing.”
You shuddered slightly and went back to looking at your phone, but he didn’t get the signal. The suggestions he kept throwing your way made you want to gag.
Thankfully, a flight attendant did see you become uncomfortable for a while, and she, in a few minutes, made her way to you.
“Ma’am, we do have a seat up front in business class. In case you are up for the offer?” She smiled sweetly at you but harshly at the man next to you.
You nodded and got up immediately. “I’d like that,” you said, smiling at your savior. “See ya,” you said bitterly to the man next to you and followed the flight attendant after getting your carry-on down from the cabin.
-------
The seats were plusher and nicer; you groaned in comfort when you sank yourself into it. You were sipping on some wine the flight attendant, the one that helped you, poured into a glass and handed over to you.
You gazed outside through the window, enjoying your peace and quiet, until someone cleared their throat in the aisle.
“Sorry, Ma’am, but I, um, I’m your neighbour for the next few hours,” the infamous blonde man chuckled shyly and scratched the back of his neck.
“Oh, shit, yeah. Sorry,” you got up quickly and allowed him to sidle past your seat and sit down, then he shoved his backpack under the seat in front of him. You sat back down and continued to sip on your wine, feeling a tad bit awkward sitting next to Captain America.
“I’m Steve, by the way,” he extended his hand.
You shifted the glass to your left hand, then told him your name while shaking his hand with your right. “I mean, yeah, I know who you are already. So…” you laughed nervously. He chuckled at your answer, “yeah?” To which you nodded again and went back to staring at the seat in front of you.
The lights in the plane dimmed, and you flagged down a flight attendant to hand your glass back to her. Members of the crew made their way up and down the aisle until three of them settled in three different sections of the plane to start the safety demonstration You listened mindlessly, while your heart jogged for a mile as the thought of sitting next to Steve Rogers finally sank in. He did listen to the safety demonstration and actually read the safety brochures, which were tucked into the seat in front of him. Soon, the flight attendants were preparing for take-off.
“What’s taking you to Washington?” Steve asked you, facing your direction. You made eye contact and saw the soft smile he threw your way; you instantly melted in your seat and smiled back.
“Oh, my sister is getting married,” you nodded and adjusted the neck pillow around your neck. He nodded and crossed his arms over his muscled chest. “I see.”
“What about you? I’m guessing something related to ‘Captain America’?” You chuckled nervously as you felt the plane rumble slightly. He laughed at your assumption, “you would think so, but no. Just wanted to visit the place again.”
You nodded in understanding but quickly reached for the armrest when the plane started speeding. You gripped the plastic hard and closed your eyes hard, trying to act normal when really you felt like you were in a washing machine.
“Here,” you heard him whisper. You slowly opened your eyes and saw the big open palm he was offering. You smiled in thanks, grateful for understanding, and intertwined your fingers with his before squeezing it for dear life as the plane lifted from the ground.
-------
You munched on the dry Biscoff’s they handed out during the second hour of the flight. From your peripheral, you saw Steve reading a book and at times glancing out the window.
“Hey, I just wanted to say thanks for the… you know… the hand, during take-off,” you smiled nervously, hoping that you weren’t interrupting him and his reading. He looked up from his book and bookmarked his page before closing it. “Oh, it’s no problem at all,” he smiled at you, and his eyes crinkled at the corners.
You always saw him on TV and in the trash magazines your roommate reads, never up close. And now that you were seated literally right next to him, you felt as though he’s just a regular person. It’s not like you can ask him ‘how were the 1940s’, you don’t know him on a personal level.
But you kind of do; you had to study about him in high school during history class. You know where and when he was born, the place where he grew up. Your thoughts were interrupted by the crackling of the pilot’s voice that played through the plane. You couldn’t understand the gibberish he said. “What?”
“We’re about to hit some turbulence,” Steve translated for you, and your jaw dropped.
“Great, more reasons as to why I should’ve driven,” you rubbed your eyes.
 He laughed at your annoyance towards the plane you were currently flying in.
You glanced at the book he was reading and saw the title. You instantly had to hold your laugh back as you recognized the ‘Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire’ book cover.
“Harry Potter, huh?” You pointed at the book in his lap. He looked down at it and nodded. “A friend of mine recommended it. Have you read it?”
You nodded quickly, “oh yeah, it was one of my favourites as a kid.” He smiled at your response.
“I’m a George Weasley girl, all the way. He’s such an underrated character,” you told him as your eyes moved from the book to him.
“Yeah, I think you could say that. But I would say that Hagrid is underrated as well,” he said, adding to your statement. You nodded along, “that is actually quite true, yeah.”
A moment of silence passed before he broke it. “If you don’t mind me asking, you mentioned about going to a wedding?” he asked, craning his neck to face you. You nodded, affirming his assumption.
“Are you going alone?” That made you raise your brows in pure shock.
“Uh, I—yeah,” you shook the confusion from your head. “Why?” You smiled, wondering why he asked you the semi-personal question.
He tucked his chin to his chest a little bit before facing you with the slightest smirk on his face. “Oh, I just thought that a gorgeous woman like you would have been going with someone already.”
You snorted, “WOW.” You really couldn’t believe he just said that.
“Why is that funny?” he smiled at you, a tad bit confused. You chuckled, “I just-‘gorgeous women’? Really?”
He laughed along with you, “I can’t say I’m wrong.” You bit the inside of your cheek to prevent your grin from expanding any further.
------
The next hour or so was filled with you and Steve talking about home and what you two did back in the city.
“Stark Industries? Really?” Steve was genuinely shocked at the revelation of your workplace. He wondered how he never saw you before. He asked how it was, working as a Data Analyst for Tony, and you replied saying that Tony can be immature sometimes, but he does treat you as an equal, unlike your previous jobs.
The flight went smoothly, and you and Steve were in constant conversation. You thought that you never had a conversation this good before. You were actually a bit disappointed when the pilot announced that the plane was about to land soon.
-------
“Need a hand?” Steve asked when he saw you struggling to get your carry-on from the cabin.
“Yeah,” you nodded sheepishly. He flashed you with one of his million-dollar smiles and effortlessly brought your carry-on down from the overhead shelf. You said your thanks and replied with a ‘No problem’.
-------
Steve finally got all of his bags, but you were still standing next to the belt awaiting your final one.
“I guess this is where we part,” you laughed nervously, toying with the strings of your hoodie.
You saw it in his face; he didn’t want to leave you just yet. And you were thankful for that because you didn’t too.
“Yeah, I guess it is,” he smiled, but this time it was sad.
This was bad, really bad. You both didn’t want to leave the other.
“Have a good Christmas,” he finished the sentence off with your name, and your heart fluttered with how it rolled off his tongue. Why did you heart flutter?
You both smiled sadly at each other for the final time before he reluctantly parted ways. Why did he hesitate?
💌💌💌
Genuinely upset you couldn't get your man @yiiiikesmish, hope this helps you soothe your woes babes.
Again, if any of you lovelies want be added to the taglist. Please comment here!!🤗🤗🤗
Till' then
Stay Coquette-y,
Anya 🫶🏽🕊️🎀
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cevansbaby-dove · 3 months
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All i gave you is gone.
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Pairing:Steve Rogers X bestfriend!Reader.
Summary: What started out as a regular mission for you and Steve, quickly turns south when something goes horrifically wrong. When you have to pay for this with your life, Steve is in for more heartbreak than he ever thought anyone could possibly live through.
This is a what if he fell for you and not peggy.
"Steve!! where is that damn gun of mine?" You asked punching one of the bad guys.
Steve throws his shield. 'Give me a minute Agent L/N" You smiled and say over the com in your ear. "Last name Rogers?" he chuckles. "Sorry it's a habit"
"Well try to break-" You gasp and feel a sharp bullet hit your chest. You look at the wound and Tony says "Y/N!??"
He lands and catches you. "No no!" You say. "To...tony" Steve is yelling through the coms. "Stark talk to me!"
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You lay in a bed unconscious and Steve hasn't left your side since you got there four hours ago. "Come on Y/N please don't leave me"
he kisses your hand and Bruce walks in with Natasha. She walks over and places her hand on Steve's shoulders.
"I can't lose-" he tries to speak but he get choked up again. Tony walks in. "How is she?" Natasha looks at Tony and shakes her head. "No change"
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"Rogers i'm sorry i would gladly take that bullet for her" Steve looks at you then you flat line. "Y/N?! no no please god no!" he stands up doing CPR and Bruce says. "She's-"
Steve turns and grabs tony by his shirt and slams him to the wall. "This is your fault! if you didn't be such a hero you'd be dead and not her!"
Tony blinks. "Steve calm down" Steve Let's go of him and walks out of the room.
Tony fixes his shirt. "How is he like this over y/n? Am i missing something?"
Nat says. "I'll talk to him" She walks out and sees Steve in the hallway with his head in his hands. Nat sits by him. "What's going on?"
He sits back sighing. "i didn't get to tell her how i felt about her....How i truly felt" he looks at her and she says. "You were in love with her?"
He looks at the floor. "yea and it's killing me that i never told her i showed her by doing small things for her like when she got sick i was there for her and giving her random notes during missions"
Nat nods. "Oh Steve I'm sure she knew by all you did for her and the team. She knew you loved her by your words and actions."
"i just...i feel guilty i never told her" Nat nods. "She knew Steve, She knew" He turns and she wraps her arms around him as he let the tears fall.
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Steve tried his best to not cry as he and the team carried your casket down to the church.
After Tony and other spoke it was Steve's turn. He stands up and walks over to the stand and looks at everyone.
"Y/N was not only part of this team she was a best friend to us...she was the girl i fell in love with, Y/n could light up a room with just a smile and her laugh. She was tough as nails and fought up to her death. We may be mourning her but i chose to celebrate her life. Y/N L/N Thank you for all that you did in this life, I hope we meet again soon, I love you"
He walks back to his seat and looks at your casket and smiles knowing you and him would be a great power couple....in another life.
A/N: well damn i hope you enjoyed this one shot. Reblogs mean a lot.
tags@cutedisneygrl @patzammit @nicoline1998enilocin @angelbabyyy99 @mrsevans90
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