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ivebeendownsincejuly · 3 days

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romanticizing your walk to school vs actually being there

#taylor swift #ttpd #ts #the tortured poets department #taylor swift ttpd #ts ttpd #i hate it here #so high school

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littlelightfish · 19 hours

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Holm nation... I have a heartbreaking announcement to make.

We didn't get to see this panels animated.

(I wanted to see Laios helping him, this one isn't the one this post is all about)

I feel it's important to his character enough that Kui decided to dedicate three panels about how he aproaches and resurrects Kabru.

He is used to resurrecting people, his party sucks at keeping themselves alive. He walks up to Kabru's corpse with a worried look on his face. Then he kneels besides him and takes a second to process what he is seeing. He is seeing a young man, Kabru, dead. It makes him feel unseasy, a bit of shock that he can't take the luxury of process at the moment. He doesn't want to look, so he closes his eyes and focuses on his spell. He is realizing he is the only one alive from his party (he doesn't know where Mick is or how he is). He is the last one standing. The reality of it all slaps him in the face.

The panel of him just... looking at the mess Kabru's corpse is was just... It was important. It talked about him as a character. "I'm not doing this because I want to, but because I have to". He doesn't has time for emotions. He has a job to do.

It's just three panels. But they provide lots of context between the ones that came before and after.

He doesn't just rubs Kabru's head because he's being afective. He does it because he cares. He does it out of relief. "As long as I'm here, any of you'll be dying soon. And I'll always be here. Don't worry." He is far from being OK after all this. Marillier died, Daya died, Kuro died, Kabru died, Rin died, Mick probably died too (but he doesn't saw it). He... By the time he was the only one standing, the fight was over, and he could alredy resurrect them. He wants to feel sad. To worry, to be concerned, to mourn. But he can't. It isn't necessary.

He is a cleric. He for sure has a notion of dead way different than anyone and feels a certain way about resurrection. "Dying is dying, even if you resurrect." It's a bug at the corner of his mind, he doesn't pay it any attention. He gets resurrected multiple times, he is gratefull he is alive. But seeing all his friends dead? And the most of them mutilated? Covered in their own blood? He has this desire to mourn. To cry the loss. To panic. "They are all dead."

He knows they'll come back. He has to make them come back. So he does. And they are alive. But they weren't a few seconds ago. And he just plays it off, he puts his calm face on as soon as there is another party member alive that could ask him what happened that it disturbed him so much. He throws all those sad feelings under the rug and focuses at the task at hand.

They're going to be ok, he just has to do his job: bring them back from death. They shouldn't even be dead. But they are. And he's going to fix it. No point on feeling sad about them dying if they can be alive soon!

I think the concern that the anime puts here it's something that could come close to what he feels inside. Those seconds are the only ones we see him looking something akin to worried for his friends.

But then...

His worry vanishes in seconds. The moment Kabru revives, he does it in such a "Kabru" way, that he tells himself: "This is fine, they're going to be back soon, nothing to worry about, I just have to hurry". He wants them all back to live. We know for sure that in his priority list there wasn't any "reviving Toshiro's party members first". He was going to make sure all his party, all his friends, were alive before even thinking of resurrecting other people if he still had the magic.

Those three panels they didn't animate are something that was there for a reason. To give depth to Holm. This last episode is definitely the one in wich he shines the most. He isn't the main character at all this episode, but he does the most important stuff on the background. He revives them all. This all lack of something if you don't show what Kuy drew on those panels.

Here he just... goes to work. He says: "lemme handle it" and he does. No concern, no worry, no, nothing. He just does. No thoughts.

It makes me sad. Those panels were important. :(

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thisisustrying · 18 hours

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I hate it here so I will go to lunar valleys in my mind

t.s. + the motif of space

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lostillusionstuffs · 1 day

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That's the end, I don't believe in love anymore.

#poetry #quotes #life quotes #spilled ink #words #fragments #mental health #like or reblog #books & libraries #healing #i hate it here #i hate him

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evermoredeluxe · 2 days

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i was watching chats and reacts, and i do still fully think i hate it here is about taylor and her life and how she feels in general, and that she is indulging in maladaptive daydreaming despite knowing maybe it’s not the most productive, BUT now i do think there is a double meaning. ofc we all picked up that secret gardens and lunar valleys being folkmore and midnight, but they went a step further and interpreted “here” as a metaphor for joe. how he felt tortured in his career because he has to play the game, and he is the one telling her “something awful.” he is the consolation prize because being with him can’t be the real prize, right? she is a popstar, but scared to go outside because of the implications within their relationship, and how she feels trapped so she has to escape this and not write about it by immersing myself in a fake victorian world (reminiscent of 1800s, but it’s painful there too because folkmore is filled with tragedies), and then she goes into midnights because now she’s trying to escape again by dissecting her past.

also, i personally think all of this made her feel stifled in her art, not because these albums aren’t stepping stones (she managed to flourish despite everything), but because she couldn’t have felt she gave it a real try if she wrote about how it’s already over. and this is not to say that she shouldn’t have tried because that person is literally your partner and it would be unfair to give up easily (ignoring how it was unfair that he didn’t try), but that also doesn’t mean it didn’t come with a price.

#i hate it here #ttpd #the tortured poets department #taylor swift #arshia takes #arshia talks

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itrulyhatethisworld · 2 days

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it hurts

talking to someone that’ll never be yours

that’ll never see you the way you see them

will never care about you like you do them

it hurts

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w3mb13r · 2 days

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if u ever see something of mine and go "hmm... that's cringe" i'll have u know this is how i spent half my childhood

#crankthatfrank #emo quartet #mcr #gerard way #frank iero #milk fic #forest fic #asotm #patd #ryan ross #i hate it here

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amateur-scribbler · 13 hours

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Fat.

It’s a word that’s sitting in my stomach with weights tied to its feet. It’s floating down past the food I binged on and then it’s watching the purge; making the toxic cycle complete.

It’s eating up space in my mind, this obsessive outlook about the size of my thighs.

I think I’d be happier, more loveable, and more confident if I was skinnier. I lie to everyone and myself about wanting to lose weight to be healthy when it’s all about the exteriors.

I know it’s not true, just my brain trying to make me want it more, by using a twisted methodology it has always used before. My beautiful brain tries so hard to be helpful but, the whispered insults about my body to spur on change are only making me miserable.

I remind myself that the clawing voices in my mind won’t go away because I’m thinner, and I won’t magically love what’s in the mirror even if I weighed nothing more than a feather.

But, I like the grass.

No, not the bits of green in the salad, but the blades that reside on the other side of the mirror, where I assume the stars all shine clearer and of course my body is the type of unachievable perfection I’ve forever been dreaming of.

body dysmorphia is my best friend - t.k.o.

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princes-favorite-guard · 2 days

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I hope the MCR members know they're the only reason I'm getting through my college class.

#sociology #if youve taken inteo to sociology help please #there is genuinely something wrong with my professor #im only fifteen please #i cant #i have to do my stupid final #i hate it here #yapping #mcr #my chemical romance #gerard way #frank iero #ray toro #mikey way #help

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lemon8strawberry · 9 hours

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the ways in which you talk to me

“I forgive you.”

had me wishin' I were gone

“don't bother.”

#good omens #aziraphale #crowley #aziracrow #aziraphale x crowley #PLS SOMEONE GETS THIS #it's from the mr. loverman song #i hate it here #bye

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crunchysocklover · 2 days

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I just want someone to pick me up after a long day at school baby me & make me feel better :(

#princess treatment #hell is a teenage girl #just girly things #girlblogging #this is a girlblog #i want a boyfriend #older bf #this is what makes us girls #female rage #female hysteria #i hate school #i hate it here #take care of me #sweet girl

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dearth-in-serendipity · 2 days

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Feelings are denied, emotions are unseen, and thoughts are considered useless, yet I felt my heart dropping, my stomach turning, and my hands freezing. How much of it is just in my head?

ds.

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vivalamusaine · 2 months

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Reddits mods are pissed that the CEO is getting paid 190m a year while they cull CSA and hate speech for free. Instagrams AI is mistakenly banning users for spam when they comment on friends pictures. Twitter is a hate filled bot farm run by an egomaniac. Facebook is a boomer graveyard filled with AI conspiracy theories radicalizing granola moms and your grandad. Tumblrs CEO is breaking data privacy laws on a targeted harassment campaign. Tiktok is making sexism woke and trendy again. 2024 is the year social media sites implode and take us all out with them.

#i hate it here #reddit #tumblr #twitter #facebook #instagram #tiktok #photomatt #question for the culture

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evermoredeluxe · 9 days

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“i hate it here” is peak escapism and hearing her talk about how she lives in a garden no one else has access to in her mind (unlike the rest of her life) for most of the year is sooooo. made up scenarios and imagining living in the 1800s… it’s giving the lakes except she’s alone and she can’t actually leave. so much of the album is about feeling stuck and this one is about feeling stuck in herself.

#i hate it here #ttpd #the tortured poets department #taylor swift #arshia takes #arshia talks

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itrulyhatethisworld · 1 day

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𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐳𝐞

𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐲 𝐞𝐱𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲

𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧, 𝐬𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲

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artemisiatridentata · 4 months

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The US just airstriked Yemen because of the Houthi sea blockade of Israel. This is such horrifically depraved, evil shit on the part of the Biden administration. Almost beyond words.

#yemen #Biden #Palestine #free Palestine #I hate this country so fucking bad idk where to put all this rage #i hate it here #god.

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