#they’re literally merry and pippin

[aragornsrockcollection]

I would have let a slimy gremlin bite my finger off if Peter Jackson would have considered (admittedly ruining the pacing of his movie by) including the scenes in and around the halls of healing.

#tolkien #lotr #jirt #peter jackson #the lord of the rings #the return of the king #literally Aragorn vs the herbmaster is top ten battles of will #the gossipy healing lady is my best friend #Aragorn letting off steam by fucking with Merry is gold #Eowyn being revealed to have been influenced to despair by grima is key #and insisting that she should see someone she loves upon waking and that she loves Eomer more than she loves him because they’re strangers #Faramir waking up and knowing immediately Aragorn is the king #Imrahil being horrified at Pippin addressing his king like that #and Aragorn instantly translating strider into Quenya and declaring it the name of his house #just so pippin can keep calling him that #merry waking up and declaring he is hungry #Gandalf threatening to ride with Ioreth on shadowfax to get ATHELAS #perfect scene

[breadbrobin]

i adore merry and eowyn’s friendship in every way humanly possible <33333

#they’re so pure #sword fighting horse riding besties #love them #warrior besties #lore #lord of the rings #pippin and merry getting adopted by literally everyone they meet again

[laineysbucketlist]

The funny thing about shipping Frodo and Sam is seeing all these other people shipping Pippin and Merry, or Thorin and Bilbo, etc. because it’s like. Why’d you pick THAT gay lotr ship that will absolutely never be canon because the author died 50 years ago when there’s a better one right here?

#Gimli and Legolas aren’t mentioned here because they’re literally canon #Sam and Pippin and Merry all marry hobbit women and have kids and all that #But Legolas and Gimli travel the world together #And then they build a boat and go to Valinor together #To live together for eternity

[winterpinetrees]

The way that Tolkien uses height in his legendarium is, on some level, silly, but I also think that it does a great job of what it’s trying to do.

The way I understand it is that Tolkien uses height as a one syllable way to describe the “nobility” of a character. The more connection they have to the world’s beautiful, terrible past, the taller they are.

The elves of Lothlorien are very tall, even the women. Aragorn is the tallest man anyone meets, but the princes of Gondor are pretty tall too. Maedhros, firstborn son of Feanor, is tall enough that it’s his epithet. When Merry and Pippin spend time with the ancient, glorious ents, they get taller. You get it.

So it makes sense that the hobbits are so short. They’re simple farmers who aren’t even in the Silmarillion. They have no connection at all to the two trees and all of that bloodsoaked history. They are literally and figuratively the little guys.

It’s objectively funny that nearly everyone in the Silmarillion is two meters tall, but it’s a shorthand that works. I like it.

#tolkien #lord of the rings #the silmarillion #by me

[sindar-princeling]

The previous post made me think some more about the real life influences on LOTR, so because I’m down with a cold and have a lot of time to spare, I finally wanted to write a coherent post about those comments GRRM made about Aragorn and his tax policy.

For those who haven’t heard the actual quote, here it is:

Tolkien can say that Aragorn became king and reigned for a hundred years, and he was wise and good. But Tolkien doesn’t ask the question: What was Aragorn’s tax policy? Did he maintain a standing army? What did he do in times of flood and famine? And what about all these orcs? By the end of the war, Sauron is gone but all of the orcs aren’t gone – they’re in the mountains. Did Aragorn pursue a policy of systematic genocide and kill them? Even the little baby orcs, in their little orc cradles? In real life, real-life kings had real-life problems to deal with. Just being a good guy was not the answer.

And my god, do I have problems with this approach to Tolkien. It’s kind of like asking why Bilbo was unconscious for a lot of the battle of five armies, when we know it was a story Tolkien was telling his kids before sleep.

When looking at LOTR, I think you can’t not read it as an ultimate escapist fantasy - and what’s most important, Tolkien’s personal escapist fantasy.

He is Frodo - a man born into a middle class family, educated, well-read, with close friends coming from the same “social sphere��, like Merry and Pippin, who died in WWI. Sam is in a very literal sense the batmen Tolkien fought with, which he said he considered “so far superior to myself”.

Tolkien had a few batmen during the war, like the article from my previous post mentions. Most probably because he fought in a few different units, but also, he may have lost some of them to war.

And in LOTR, they all get a happy ending.

Of all four of them, Frodo is the only one who can’t return home, most probably mirroring Tolkien’s trauma. He’s the only one whose ending is grounded in trauma, PTSD, loss. The rest of the hobbits get happy endings - very simple and traditional in a way that after the war was nothing but good - they marry, they have kids, the kids marry each other, everyone is happy and lives long lives.

Sam, especially, gets the happiest ending of all in this sense - he marries a woman he grew up with, he has so many beautiful kids, he is mayor for like seven times and everyone loves him, the Shire thrives.

Tolkien was too traumatised after the war not to write Frodo as a mirror of his experiences. But then he took all the people who fought alongside him, who suffered alongside him, people who he lost, and gave them the happiest fairy tale endings he could think of. And it’s not that Merry, Pippin and Sam weren’t as traumatised - this ending is not meant to belittle their experiences - Tolkien is simply giving them the ending that real life didn’t give them.

Returning to the original point, to Aragorn - it’s just another version of the same mechanism. Gondor was struggling, Gongor had Mordor as their immediate neighbours and was heavily affected by the war as well. And then there came a just, good king, and everything was fine. The end. It’s a subplot of the same fantasy as the hobbits’ endings. It doesn’t matter how hard ruling is, we trust that Aragorn is a good king, because people of Gondor deserve a good king (the people of the real world deserved a good ruler who wouldn’t drag them to war), and we know that Aragorn is an honorable, just man.

Nothing about the LOTR ending - apart from Frodo’s trauma - is meant to be realistic. Why would Tolkien want to write WWI and the aftermath - this time fictional.

#flips the table eats the mic and leaves #it's mine my own my precious #meta #frodo #samwise #merry #pippin #aragorn #tolkien #the lord of the rings #lotr

[frodo-with-glasses]

More Reading Thoughts: The Prologue

I will never not love Tolkien’s framing device of “my fantasy epic is 100% a translation of an ancient historical book like Beowulf, it’s totally real, you guys, definitely”

“[Bullroarer Took] was surpassed in all Hobbit records only by two famous characters of old; but that curious master is dealt with in this book” is an incredibly intriguing line to me. You’d think it refers to Frodo and Sam, because of what they did to destroy the Ring—but the rest of the hobbits didn’t really care all that much about that. They saw Sam as just another mayor (if a very tenured one) and Frodo as a strange recluse. I think this line refers to Captains Meriadoc and Peregrin, actually, for their courage and leadership during the Battle of Bywater.

“To the last battle at Fornost with the Witch-lord of Angmar they sent some bowmen to the aid of the king, or so they maintained, though no tales of Men record it.” This cracks me up. First of all, the fact that hobbits claim to have sent some aid to the King’s war, but either they’re lying or mistaken or they’re literally so small and unremarkable that everyone completely forgot they were there. Secondly, this is the first and not the last time hobbits are gonna be a pain in the Witch King’s butt

“They were, in fact, sheltered, but they had ceased to remember it” is a line that goes so hard bruh

Today’s vocabulary word is “ramify, v: form branches or offshoots; spread or branch out; grow and develop in complexity or range.” So “large and ramifying tunnels”, in this case, paints the picture of the hobbit holes sprouting rooms and hallways that branch off like tree roots. Fascinating.

The fact that Merry probably has some Stoor blood in him still makes me giggle because they’re the only hobbits that could grow any sort of beard. I still maintain the headcanon that Merry has three (3) hairs on his chin, and he shaves them regularly and is inordinately proud of them.

“Sometimes, as in the case of the Tooks of Great Smials, or the Brandybucks of Brandy Hall, many generations of relatives lived in (comparative) peace together in one ancestral and many-tunnelled mansion.” That little interjection of “comparative” was not mine, it’s right there in the text, and it has me cracking up X-D

Merry’s little personal asides in “Concerning Pipeweed” are absolutely darling—including the shade at Breelanders, the almost wistful descriptions of how much better the plant grows in Gondor, and the fond way he speaks of Gandalf.

Okay so I once claimed that the book never refers to Frodo as Bilbo’s nephew, only as his young kinsman; but here at the end of section three he is actually called “Frodo his favorite ‘nephew’”, with the quotation marks and all. So the idea is already planted in our minds that their relationship is sort of avuncular (throwback to that old vocab word!) before we start the story.

“With [Thorin’s company Bilbo] set out, to his own lasting astonishment…” 🤣🤣🤣

Boy I still need to do Bilbo-With-Glasses someday

Tolkien taking several pages of prologue to explain the inconsistency of the riddle game in The Hobbit will never not be funny

“And no one else in the Shire knew of [the Ring’s] existence, or so he believed.” Except for Merry, who watched him put it on to escape the Sackville-Bagginses that one time.

It’s called the Red Book of Westmarch because it came from Undertowers!! Guarded by the Fairbairns!! ELANOR’S KIDS!! HI HELLO I’M HAVING EMOTIONS

“The original Red Book has not been preserved, but many copies were made, especially of the first volume, for the use of the descendants of Master Samwise.” I AM HAVING ✨EMOTIONS✨

PIPPIN BROUGHT A COPY OF THE RED BOOK TO GONDOR WHEN HE WAS OLD

AND THEN ARAGORN HAD IT COPIED AGAIN

AND THAT’S THE ONE THAT WAS “TRANSLATED” INTO LOTR

HELP

The fact that Merry wrote so many books and Pippin wrote none is honestly so in-character for both of them

And Merry frequently visited Rivendell!! You guys I cry

#chapter review #lord of the rings #lotr #my writing

[velvet4510]

I ship every canonical Tolkien couple - except Aerin & Brodda, Aredhel & Eöl, and Tar-Míriel & Ar-Pharazôn. Those poor ladies deserved so much better than those pathetic a-holes.

(I also kinda think Melian could’ve done better than Thingol.)

These are the “non-canonical” Tolkien pairings that I ship, since nobody asked.

Frodo x Sam (it’s literally canon, period, forget the “non-canonical” category, it’s right there, it’s real)

Frodo x Sam x Rosie (Sam being shared during that year in Bag End; also all but spelled out)

Bilbo x Thorin (obviously; even in the book, it’s subtextual, but it’s THERE)

Fingon x Maedhros (Beren/Lúthien + Frodo/Sam parallels are no joke; yes yes i know i know they’re first cousins and that should be a dealbreaker, and for a while it was for me, but technically they’re HALF-cousins, they only share one grandparent, and it’s not like they can procreate together, so it’s very different from what it would be if one of them was female, also their story is inherently tragic and I think their being related adds to that)

Túrin x Beleg (also, obviously; i mean Túrin only thought he loved Níniel because he felt some kind of connection with her but misinterpreted it in his desperation to get over Beleg)

Finrod x Bëor (yes, Finrod loved Amarië too, and they definitely got their well-deserved happily ever after when Finrod was re-embodied…BUT look at what Bëor did for Finrod and how Finrod lost Bëor to mortality but then laid down his life for Bëor’s descendant; the angst is just too juicy to ignore)

I do not ship Merry and Pippin at all; not only are they full blooded first cousins, but since Merry is an only child and Pippin only has sisters, they very clearly fill that “brother” role in each other’s lives.

After a lot of thought, I’ve decided that queerplatonic Legolas/Gimli makes the most sense to me. They also fill the “brother” role in each other’s lives since they both have no blood siblings. I understand why many people do ship them romantically/sexually, but the thought of anything sexual between them just doesn’t feel right to me, personally. Even the thought of kisses just doesn’t seem to fit them, IMO; they’re about mutual respect and sharing quality time, rather than anything physical. To me they exemplify “heterosexual life partners” perfectly.

#lotr #jrr tolkien #lotr books #lord of the rings #the silmarillion #the hobbit #tolkien legendarium #lotr ships #samfro #bagginshield #russingon #finrod x beor #turin x beleg #frodo x sam x rosie #frodo baggins #samwise gamgee #bilbo baggins #thorin oakenshield #fingon #maedhros #finrod felagund #beor #turin turambar #beleg cuthalion #rosie cotton #merry and pippin #legolas and gimli

[swordplease]

Merry Pippin and Sam from the books are actually the most hobbits ever. like. frodo having them help him in this elaborate scheme to have him move away to a house in Buckland, trying SO hard to pretend that it’s bc he’s losing money and he just feels like moving and he’s like agonizing over it to himself the whole way. They get there and merry is like go take baths you stinky shits and they’re like oh well who’s gonna go first and he’s like actually I personally arranged it so there’s THREE bathtubs because I KNEW you fucking gay assholes would fight over this. Frodo working up the courage to tell them that he can’t stay there and has to go further away and they’re straight up like “LOL dude we know, youre a shit liar also you literally kept talking to yourself about for months. Plus merry saw bilbo put the ring on and disappear so he could avoid a social interaction like YEARS ago dude. so yeah danger is whatever. Btw we’re coming with you.” like. truly epic bro moments

#bilbo teaches Sam to write and Aragorn is like. way more Dad than in the movies but he’s also not bc the hobbits are adults but he’s also #he’s like dad in that he knows lore and woods #he’s lore and woods dad #also like there’s SO many other ppl in the books who drop everything to help Frodo when they know nothing like #yes Tom but more importantly fatty bulger and farmer maggot and the Bree i keeper who’s name I forget #who BUYS THEM A PONY #anyway #Lotr #lotr: fotr #fotr #lotr books #hobbits #merry and pippin #frodo baggins #samwise gamgee

[ironmandeficiency]

modern lotr character headcanons

characters included: aragorn, boromir, gimli, legolas, pippin, merry, frodo, sam, arwen, eomer, eowyn

word count: 745

summary: random thoughts abt lotr characters if they lived in modern times

a/n: this is literally just silly shit, enjoy

boromir listens to old country (conway twitty, george jones, loretta lynn, etc.) and does not tolerate anyone insulting the opry legends

he also listens to divorced dad rock (hinder, nickelback, theory of a dead man, etc.) which gimli will sometimes jam to as well

gimli lovingly maintains an old-as-dirt bench seat ford truck despite there almost constantly being something wrong with it. ignores legolas’s badgering about him getting something more reliable

obviously legolas drives a hybrid and he almost acts as if this fact makes him better than gimli (not in a dickish way, though)

horse girl aragorn.

frodo is the epitome of shy emo boy with the black skinny jeans & death cab for cutie playing in his air pods

merry is the golden retriever in the “golden retriever in love with the black cat” trope 

aragorn and arwen host game nights and various other parties for their friends, but neither of them can cook so they just order delivery (or sam hijacks their kitchen for the hours before)

pippin has a large follower base on social media bc of his drinking songs and other inebriated antics that are usually recorded by whoever happens to be with him that night. usually it’s eowyn & merry, and the three of them will shake some major ass to megan thee stallion

sam goes to open mic nights at local coffee shops to people watch. he will never perform himself, but it’s nice to watch people he knows do their thing

eomer accidentally goes viral on tiktok when eowyn records him doing some dumb shit. never lives it down

the amount of joy gimli gets from going to rage rooms is almost alarming

arwen has a very thorough skin care regimen that she introduces to aragorn, and it becomes a sweet nightly routine for the two of them

eowyn & eomer don’t allow anyone to talk shit about or annoy the other bc that’s their job fuck you very much

frodo has a shitty immune system but sam’s homemade soups seem to always heal from the soul outward

sam is the little spoon favored by the resident neurodivergent

frodo is the resident neurodivergent

yes they’re dating

arwen is always the dd

when it comes to birthdays, don’t ask boromir to remember anyone but faramir’s. hell, he forgets his own birthday sometimes

legolas is the best at remembering the birthdays of his friends but forgets his own

they have to remind each other of their own birthdays when that time of year comes around

merry is always the favorite audience member at a drag show

arwen & eowyn never dress like they’re going to the same place when they hang out

gimli says southern grandpa idioms unironically — “as useless as a screen door on a submarine”, “higher than eagle titties”, “busier than a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest”, you get the idea. merry keeps a running tab of said quotes

boromir is the “we’re not getting a dog” dad. said dog ends up being his best friend & the sole inheritor in his will, fuck them kids

aragorn & gimli have their own moonshine still they think is perfectly hidden from everyone

that does not include merry & pippin, who are booze bloodhounds and immediately knew where to find it but swore to secrecy as long as they got more than everyone else

frodo sips fruity little drinks because he can’t shoot whiskey

sam can drink in the way only a divorced middle-age man can despite not being a divorced middle-aged man

eowyn cannot drive for shit & the several dents on her car prove it. the only reason her insurance hasn’t gone up astronomically is because she just. doesn’t report any of it

said car has a fuck ton of bumper stickers with all sorts of silly things

gimli can’t ride a bike AT ALL but has a motorcycle, make it make sense

he goes on bike rides with eomer when they have the time & the weather is nice

merry & pippin are two halves of a whole idiot at every given moment

eomer LOVES 90s and 00s country music but is kinda picky about newer country (he is a massive fan of cody johnson but will throw you through a wall if you talk about morgan wallen in his presence)

arwen dances in the rain & literally never gets sick from it. merry is insanely jealous of this fact

frodo’s favorite video game is animal crossing: new horizons & has very sound opinions on what villagers are the best (fuck you, rodney)

#lotr imagine #lotr headcanons #lord of the rings imagine #lord of the rings headcanons #aragorn x arwen #frodo x sam #the fellowship of the ring #modern au #tolkienverse #lotr modern au #boromir #gimli #arwen #aragorn #frodo baggings #samwise gamgee #merry brandybuck #pippin took #legolas thranduilion #eomer eadig #eowyn of rohan

[wordbunch]

the fellowship in a college dorm

a/n.... uhhHHH this is a thing..... i have nothing to say in my defense. have fun 💛

warnings: mentions of alcohol and weed i guess? but literally just mentions.

Aragorn + Boromir: they actually bicker a surprising amount, but they’re the only ones allowed to talk shit about each other // every other night they accidentally end up talking until like 2 a.m. and having a heart-to-heart // neither of them likes cleaning but they will definitely grumpily do it when it’s their turn // Aragorn makes tea a lot and he has a collection with various tea flavors // also he is outside a lot so he isn’t even in the room that much and on the outside Boromir is like hell yes 😎😏 but actually he’s like 😔😔😔 // Boromir wants to have a pet but it’s not allowed so he feeds birds or stray cats outside // Aragorn will eat whatever is in the fridge, no matter how old, and miraculously never get sick // Boromir’s guilty pleasure are long showers // Faramir is the lil brother who studies abroad but likes to come visit and then he crashes in their room but he lowkey hates the mess and he gives the room a deep clean every single time // in return Boromir and Aragorn take him to cool places and buy him food and they act responsible when Faramir gets wasted (he is a total lightweight) // their room is right underneath Merry and Pippin and they often wonder WHAT is happening upstairs🤨 // generally they’re very decent neighbors to have except for when Faramir comes to visit, then they get up to shenanigans because they wanna be those Super Cool Big Brothers who do all sorts of “forbidden” things with the lil bro and living it up 🤪// surprisingly (or not??) Boromir is the one who always organizes things like ‘the secret santa’ for the dorm squad also he is the designated “bring the bluetooth speaker” guy // Aragorn likes to make and build DIY stuff + Boromir is prone to accidentally breaking things = bad combo // however it will usually get smoothed over with a beer or two, which is usually how they solve their lil conflicts 🍻

Legolas + Gimli: the LIGHTEST sleeper sharing a dorm with the one who snores like a truck and cannot be woken up, if not by a nuclear attack // Legolas immediately invested in ear plugs and he just lays down looking at the ceiling for hours on end while Gimli happily sleeps // Legolas tries to have aesthetically pleasing decorations and he definitely has quite a few plants on his side of the room, but he really. loves. stickers. so his aesthetic goes out the window pretty quickly, and suddenly there’s stickers everywhere // Gimli has posters of like, rock and metal bands on the walls and one pinboard dedicated exclusively to concert & festival tickets // he also likes to play loud music with open windows and sometimes Legolas wants to STRANGLE him, but eventually he realizes he will miss it when the semester is over (and he will miss the snoring too)  🥺🥺🥺// strands of fallen hair everywhere. everywhere. // also both of them have lots of hair products, but obviously for very different hair types so… chaos ensues if they accidentally switch them (accidentally? Merry and Pippin have entered the chat.👀) // Gimli eats all of Legolas’ leftovers // Legolas 100% asks super weird questions at like 3 in the morning and he most definitely has a 13 step skincare routine // once he was doing skincare in the middle of the night, because he can study well at night and then he needs to unwind, and fsr Gimli woke up and was scared shitless by Legolas in a face mask // Legolas lounges around in tights and always ALWAYS has a witty comment for any situation or person // out of everyone, they’re the pair of roommates with the biggest differences, but they bully each other affectionately the most and they bond A LOT over secretly talking shit about others; however, nobody else in the 500 mile radius isn’t allowed to say a single bad thing about their friends // Gimli will drink straight outta the carton/bottle/whatever, while Legolas uses fancy thrifted champagne glasses to drink WATER✨

Merry + Pippin: their room is the designated hangout place // more often than not there’s at least one more person in the room just chilling // also they got The Weed…so maybe that’s why?? ☘️☘️ // literally never a quiet moment // the room is a mess but it’s never dirty! it’s just organized chaos and both of them always know where everything is // posters, random trinkets, a collection of random bottle caps or something like that // Merry has fairy lights and quite a few books and he’s used to completely tuning out Pippin’s random rambling while reading/studying // Pippin sings in the shower (basically canon actually) and loses track of time and suddenly the whole floor is complaining about not having warm water // they go over to hang with Boromir when Aragorn is off to who knows where // they wear each other’s clothes almost always and have a pretty much shared wardrobe at this point // accidentally almost burned down or flooded the room more than once but they REALLY like scented candles!! // Merry has some miserable old acoustic guitar and thinks he is A Musician and Songwriter™ (everyone except Sam is like no <3) // pre-drinks before going out are ALWAYS in their room and then others accidentally leave some of their stuff there; the following week Pippin just appears in a band tshirt (of a band he doesn’t even know) that might have belonged to Gimli at some point… 🤫// when Pippin talks gibberish in his sleep, Merry records it and plays it during hangouts // Merry, Frodo and Legolas have a mini book club but a wildly different taste in books // when Pippin goes to someone else’s room, he will point at things on the shelves/walls and ask a hundred ‘and where’s that from’s’ 👀// so many times something (better than someone!) accidentally fell through the window and then Aragorn or Boromir caught it downstairs // they would really like a pet but they can’t so once Pippin caught a butterfly in a jar as a pet substitute, but felt too bad and released it almost immediately🥺 // Merry likes to play therapist for others but… take his advice at your own risk

Frodo + Sam: literally the quietest room ever, others sometimes wonder if they’re alive // of course Sam has as many plants on the windowsill as possible // Frodo has a nice little book collection and some old maps as wall decor and also he likes collecting nice stuff like postcards or magnets  // they have an air humidifier and scented candles and it’s the coziest room for sleeping 😌😌😌// so their friends will gladly crash there for a nap, especially after an exam or a party // also they have some nice herbal soaps // obligatory classical/instrumental music for studying // Sam obviously uses the common kitchen the most, and he always makes too much of everything and then feeds his friends, and even leaves some leftovers in the kitchen so that others from the building can freely take it 💖// Sam and Aragorn are those that are called when something needs a quick fix, like a leaking tap in the bathroom or sth // Frodo is one of those people that are like, resident advice giver, but Legolas is surprisingly nosy?? so he will just drop by (with an obligatory snack) to listen to whoever is spilling their woes to Frodo // neither Sam nor Frodo really have the heart to yell at Merry and Pippin when they’re being too wild, but ONCE it was just too much and it was during exam season, and they enlisted Gimli to help them pull a prank in which he pretended to be a security guard threatening to throw out Merry and Pippin 😈// Gimli has a really soft spot for these two idk, he’ll be like “if anyone EVER bullies you-” // Sam falls fatally in love with someone every other week and he will literally sit by the window and sigh and stare into the distance while Frodo is trying not to die laughing // they have a little projector that they bring for movie nights // Frodo made a groupchat for all of them… resulting in even more tomfoolery <3

-

i’ll be sappy for a moment and say i’m grateful for all the fun and crazy times i’ve had in my dorm life... it’s been good thanks 4 everything 🥰

✨ taglist my beloved ✨ @lotrnonsense​​​​​​ @starlady66​​​​​​ @queenmeriadoc​​ @entishramblings​​​​​​ @thesolarangel​​​​​​ @silversword7000​​​​​​ @friendofthefellowshipsnerdblog​​​​​​ @averys-place​​​​​​ @valkyriepirate​​​​​​ @emmaarenstarr​​​​​​ @noldorinpainter​​​​​​ @asianbutnotjapanese​​​​​​ @adamgetawaydriver​​​​​​ @fenharel-enaste​​​​​​ @ironmandeficiency​​​​​​      @starryeyedrogue​​ @dinofromspac3​​  @wisheduponastar​ @lady-of-imladris​ @frodo-cinnamonroll​  (i sincerely apologize for putting you through this)

#lotr shitpost #lotr modern au #lord of the rings #lord of the rings headcanons #lord of the rings fanfiction #lotr headcanons #lotr fanfic #lotr #legolas #aragorn #boromir #faramir #merry brandybuck #pippin took #frodo baggins #sam gamgee #gimli #from my pocketses

[philtstone]

your choice of Fellowship members, 17

#17 -- "San Fransisco", The Mowgli's I've been in love with love and the idea of, Something binding us together, You know that love is strong enough :')

For all that Sam has only just traversed half of Middle Earth and faced unspeakable horrors, there is still a small part of him, which he is sure many a self-respecting Hobbit would be proud of, that feels wholly out of sorts at an event of Men so grand as this.

The food at Aragorn's coronation feast is right delicious, though. This does make Sam feel very confirmed in his choice of friends.

"I don't think they'll do it," comes Pippin's voice, while Sam finishes the last of his ale and happily digs into a very flavourful sweet potato pie, "there's too many people watchin'. And her father's right there and everything."

"I'll bet you half of Gimli's best pipeweed,” says Merry, “in ten minutes -- alright, fifteen -- they’ll be off. Go on, look at their faces, Pip."

"Bet on your own pipeweed," grumbles Gimli, rather more loudly than might be advisable. "And nae, they'll last another twenty yet. These elf types are made of unnaturally strong stuff, I've come to find."

"You're only saving the pipeweed because you are afraid of losing it to me," says Legolas calmly. "As I am correct in thinking they shan't last five."

Sam watches as Gimli takes back his compliment, and Legolas's flagon of ale, with great ceremony. Legolas is handed a second, unscathed flagon immediately by Pippin, who seems to have produced it out of thin air.

Amongst all the everything else, Sam has to admit there's something relieving about being able to simply sit in companionable tomfoolery with his old friends. There is still loss, lingering around them, but it doesn't hurt so -- certainly not at a time like this, when joy ripples through the room like a bubbling brook, carried by most everyone in the court but none so effortlessly as Aragorn himself, whose face -- ever grave, often warm in Sam's memory -- is transformed completely into a beacon of radiant, cloudless laughter.

Beside him, almost literally glowing with her own happiness, is Lady Arwen.

Throughout the former half of the day, Aragorn had admirably devoted his attention to any and all who required it, with a forward sincerity that no one could question. It’s by now late evening, and the King and his lady have spent the day standing closer and closer to one another until now they are all but bound at the hip like lovers (which Sam supposes with a little private nod to himself they are), sat at the great table at the front of the room (most folk are too caught up in their own celebrating to notice anymore), arm in arm (like black-eyed Susans wrapped ‘round each other!), and with their heads bowed such that their cheeks almost touch but not so much that the whole hall can’t see their delighted, whisper-y, intimate laughter. 

They’ve been at it for nearly an hour by now. It’s a little hard to tell whose robe starts where. Sam’s sure that were this any other time and place, there'd be a lot of tongues wagging about propriety and such.

Then again, Sam doesn't know much about propriety when it comes to Men and Elves, does he? 

“I’m telling you,” says Merry. “Fifteen more minutes, and then we’ll look over, and they’ve snuck off.”

“No, no,” says Pippin, wiping importantly at his froth mustache; they are, Sam’s got to admit, all a bit in their cups. “They’re too much in their own world. I don’t think it’ll occur to them to do it.”

“Five,” says Legolas primly. “The people are reveling and Lord Elrond looks pleased.”

“He’s looking pleased at the wall all the way over there,” says Gimli, stifling a dignified burp. He passes Legolas the ale again, who takes it and finishes it off, “which is well enough, I’d agree, but dear Pippin makes a good point.”

“Why thank you, Gimli.”

“What do you think, Frodo?” asks Merry, crossing his arms in a preemptive triumph.

They all look over; Frodo’s been more quiet than any of the rest of them all evening, which is to be expected these days. Sam thinks this with a sharp ache in his heart. Merry and Pippin and Gimli, alongside many others, have loosened their proverbial neckties and rumpled themselves the way grand feasts ought to rumple you; even Legolas has hairs sitting the wrong way on his head. Save the scarf Pippin lent an hour ago for additional warmth, Frodo looks just as he was early this morning: clean and tired, and occasionally with a small smile on his face whenever he looks upon his friends. For Merry's question he does not have a smile, and takes a long moment to answer, and Sam worries that perhaps in their own enjoyment they’ve left him too long to be caught in his own head and heartache – on a night like this! – and the thought carries with it a sort of sadness that a Sam of only a year ago wouldn’t have thought possible.  

Then Frodo says,

“The real question we ought to be asking, Merry, is — how much do we think Aragorn has had to drink?”

And he isn’t his old self, to be sure, but he’s got a little sparkle of mischief in his eye that gets Sam grinning a big old grin.

The collective begins muttering contemplatively amongst themselves quite immediately.

“Now that is a good question,” says Merry. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen him have more’n a cup,” opines Gimli. “Now, Legolas — Legolas --" (He reaches an arm over to swat at the elf) "you've known him longer than the rest of us --"

“Hmmmm,” is all Legolas says, deep in a consternated focus, looking with such drunken intensity at the king that Sam thinks it’s a miracle Aragorn doesn’t notice.

Or maybe he does, and is just ignoring them.

“He does seem awful giggly-like,” says Pippin, drawing his chin back with wide eyes and a voice tinged with a bit of awe, “that’s right enough.”

Even Sam finds himself seriously considering Frodo's question.

Then,

“He has had barely a drop,” interrupts a sudden, sonorous voice, and the group of them startles sharply. There, of course, is Gandalf: appeared robed and overall perfectly put together behind their table, sucking serenely on his pipe where he stands tall above them, “for the King's attention has been elsewhere; what you are observing is simply the effects of being in love.”

His eyes twinkle with the same mischief Frodo's held.

“Or,” Gandalf adds slowly, “indeed, what you are not observing.”

He nods with significance, and Sam turns back to see a thoroughly empty pair of seats.

“Oh!” exclaims Pippin.

“How long’s it been?” demands Merry.

"I cannot see them!" cries Legolas.

“Oh, not four minutes,” says Gandalf gravely, and Legolas makes a dismayed face.

“But a moment off!” he laments.

“So I suppose not a single one of you may claim Glimli's good pipeweed,” Gandalf informs them. He blows a perfectly shaped smoke ring towards Merry, who sighs with yearning; Pippin is still looking around the room open-mouthed with surprise. “Now, if you might excuse me, I must go meddle in some affairs,” says Gandalf.

He sweeps away, towards the other far corner of the hall, where between the dancers Faramir stands shooting looks (Sam's sure he himself has had such looks in the past) at a resplendent (if slightly red cheeked) White Lady of Rohan.

Sam sits back in his seat. It's true, all in all: Aragorn and Arwen really are nowhere to be found. Lord Elrond, Sam notices, continues to look very determinedly at that wall, but with a happy sort of expression on his face.

Sam's seen just enough of the world to figure when how some elves are feeling, at least.

"He could've come said goodnight," says Merry, sounding slightly put out.

"Ach," says Gimli, with a surety that's very characteristic of him, yes, but terribly comforting all the same. "We'll see him again tomorrow."

And the simple truth of it, Sam thinks -- if just for now -- might be the greatest relief they've all felt in some time.

He looks towards Frodo; he has a hand held over his mouth, and is working very hard to smother his laughter. With another private nod to himself, Sam digs back into his potato pie.

“So …” begins Pippin's voice again after a moment, emerging from the cheerful bustle and chatter around them. “How long do we think, 'til Faramir and Eowyn sneak off?"

#hello. i am deep in my feelings about Them #lord of the rings #my writing #sam gamgee #frodo baggins #legolas greenleaf #gimli son of gloin #aragorn #arwen undomiel #aragorn x arwen #merry brandybuck #pippin took #gandalf #return of the king #spotify wrapped prompt meme #lotrweek

[dumbass-duo-showdown]

DUMBASS DUO SHOWDOWN ROUND 1 BATTLE 13

Merry & Pippin (lord of the rings) vs The Doctor & Donna (dr who)

REMINDER TO CHECK OUT THE PROPAGANDA UNDER THE CUT BEFORE VOTING

Merry & Pippin

They caused nearly all of the problems in The Fellowship of the Ring + they’re small and silly

Dr Donna

Just. Watch the scene where they find each other again. The miming/lipreading through glass windows. It is absolute gold. But all of partners in crime is. Also, they literally merge together in the end, so they actually share a brain for a while

The miming scene in Partners in Crime

They are So Dumb!! Like yeah they’re smart and they solve all the cases and shit but like!! They are so so dumb oh my god! They had a whole charades convo while trying to hide while the villain was in the room watching it was hilarious. Every interaction between the two is like brain cells are actively being lost. They are idiots you’re honor! The doctor brings up all these alien invasions and Donna is like “wtf are you talking about mate”. Also Donna has to open a door by putting her hand in a hand scanner thing but it’s a scanner for aliens with only 3 fingers and she’s like “it won’t work! I have 5 fingers” and the doctor is like….. “you can just put your fingers together?????”

#round 1 #polls #dumbass duo showdown #poll tournament #tournament poll #tumblr tournament #poll bracket #poll #tumblr polls #character tournament #bracket tournament #fandom tournament #merry and pippin #Meriadoc Vinbock #Peregrin Took #lord of the rings #the hobbit #the fellowship of the ring #dr donna #dr who

[possibly-in-wonderland]

Boromir and his chaotic hobbit wife

(and some incorrect quotes ft her in general, maybe one day she'll have a name...but for now we refer to her as hobbitess)

~~~~

Boromir: *wakes up to find flowers woven in his hair*

~~~~

Boromir: .. .----. -- / … --- .-. .-. -.-- (translation: I'M SORRY) Hobbitess: What's that? Boromir: Remorse code. Hobbitess: I'm even angrier now.

~~~~

Boromir: Fight me! Hobbitess, standing behind him and holding a knife: *mouths* Do not.

~~~~

Boromir: Everyone has a toxic trait. Except Hobbitess, they’re perfect. Hobbitess: Wrong! My toxic trait is how badly I want to domesticate a warg.

~~~~

Boromir: You have Crayons? Hobbitess: Yes, I have— Boromir: You're— how old are you? Hobbitess: YES I AM AN ADULT AND I HAVE CRAYONS, I HAVE A BOX OF EMERGENCY CRAYONS IN THE CABINET UNDER THE SINK BECAUSE EVERYBODY NEEDS CRAYONS SOMETIMES, OKAY? EVERYBODY NEEDS CRAYONS.

~~~~

Hobbitess: Hey, what’s the name of the guy who lives down the hall? Boromir: His cats' names are Walter and Rose. Hobbitess: That's not what I asked. Boromir: That is all the information I have.

~~~~

Boromir: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake. Hobbitess: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear. Boromir: ... Boromir: You mean ring bearER, right? Hobbitess: ... Boromir: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

~~~~

Hobbitess: Oh, fiddlesticks! That really ruffles my feathers! Boromir: Please, just say fuck.

~~~~

Hobbitess: You know what? Let’s give it a go. What’s the worst that could happen? Boromir: Humiliation, embarrassment, fire, explosions, collisions, tears, nudity and death.

~~~~

Hobbitess: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it. Boromir: Hobbitess no. Gimli: Mistlefoe. Boromir: Please stop encouraging her.

~~~~

Aragorn: We need a distraction. Boromir: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises? Hobbitess, whispering: My time has come

~~~~

Hobbitess, Pippin, and Merry are sitting on a bench Gandalf: Why do you guys look so sad? Hobbitess: Sit down with us so we can tell you. *Gandalf sits down* Pippin: The bench is freshly painted.

~~~~

Gandalf: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no clue what to put in them. Suggestions? Pippin: Put spaghetti in it. Gandalf: I'm currently taking suggestions from literally anyone but you. Merry: Put spaghetti in it. Gandalf: I'm currently taking suggestions from anyone but you two. Hobbitess: Put spaghetti in it. Gandalf: I'm no longer taking suggestions.

~~~~

Hobbitess: *Screams* Pippin: *Screams louder to establish dominance* Aragorn: Should we do something? Merry: No, I want to see who wins.

~~~~

Hobbitess: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container. Pippin: The cow??? Hobbitess: What? Merry: Pippin, W H Y?

~~~~

Hobbitess: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million gold? Pippin: You stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house. Merry: You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million. Pippin: Good thinking.

~~~~

Hobbitess: So uhhh... my question is: my friend keeps on going into the pantry and grabbing handfuls of fettuccine... uncooked... Sam: I would hope they're not grabbing handfuls of cooked fettuccine! Frodo: In your pantry! Hobbitess: Yeah... and eating them raw, and they keep calling them 'chips'. ... How do I make them stop? Sam: Is your friend here? Hobbitess, motioning to Pippin: Yeah. Sam, to Pippin: You're a monster! Words MEAN things! >:( Merry: Does anybody remember- I haven't been to Olive Garden in many moons- but they DO have a like- fettuccine bottle that you can just- grab em out of and chew- Merry: HOLD ON. WAS THIS A PRANK YOU GUYS PULLED ON ME WHEN WE WENT TO OLIVE GARDEN AS KIDS?! Merry: NO, STOP. EVERYBODY SHUT UP. DO THEY GIVE YOU RAW FETTUCCINE TO CHEW ON IN THE LOBBY OF THE OLIVE GARDEN Everyone else: No. Merry, to Sam and Frodo: YOU FUCKIN BASTARDS Sam: YAAAAAAAAY! Frodo: THE PRESTIGE!

~~~~ Hobbitess: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me? Gandalf: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it. Hobbitess: Four of us saw it, Gandalf. How do you explain that? Gandalf: *points at Merry & Pippin* Sleep deprivation. *points at Sam* Paranoia. *points at Frodo* Delusional personality disorder.

~~~~

*The squad right before Hobbitess' & Boromir's wedding* Pippin: Well I have to go, I have a wedding to attend. Merry: Wait... Oh! I have a wedding to attend too! Sam: Oh, I have a wedding to attend as well Frodo: I THINK WE ALL HAVE WEDDINGS TO ATTEND Aragorn, panicked: I THINK I HAVE A WEDDING TO OFFICIATE

~~~~

Frodo, walking into his house: Hello, people who do not live here. Pippin: Hey. Merry: Hi. Sam: Hello. Hobbitess: Hey! Frodo: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only! Hobbitess: We were out of seed cakes.

~~~~

Frodo: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous. Pippin: What if it bites me and it dies!? Merry: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Pippin, learn to listen. Sam: What if it bites itself and I die? Hobbitess: That’s voodoo. Boromir: What if it bites me and someone else dies? Sam: That’s correlation, not causation. Pippin: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die? Hobbitess: That’s kinky. Frodo: Oh my God.

~~~~

Hobbitess: Time for plan G. Pippin: Don’t you mean plan B? Hobbitess: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties. Merry: What about plan D? Hobbitess: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago. Sam: What about plan E? Hobbitess: I’m hoping not to use it. Pippin dies in plan E. Gandalf: I like plan E.

~~~~

Boromir: HELP! I TOLD HOBBITESS I’D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN’T COOK! Aragorn, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

~~~~

Hobbitess: Boromir and I don’t use pet names. Aragorn: I see. Hey, what do bees make? Hobbitess: Honey? Boromir: Yes, dear? Hobbitess: Aragorn: Don't ever lie to my face again.

~~~~

Hobbitess: What time is it? Pippin: I don’t know; pass me that saxophone and we’ll find out Pippin: *Plays sax loudly and extremely out of tune* Gandalf: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING Pippin: It’s 2 am

~~~~

Boromir: I really like this whole ‘good guy, bad guy’ thing you guys have going on. Hobbitess: It’s not an act, it’s just that I’m mean and Pippin isn’t

~~~~

Hobbitess: Dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life Merry: Fluffy and dead with a gust of wind? Hobbitess: Unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Bastardous. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die. Pippin: edible

~~~~

Hobbitess: I've already sent good vibes your way… they’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them. Boromir: This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.

~~~~

Hobbitess, pointing: May I sit there? Boromir: That's my lap Hobbitess: That doesn't answer my question, Boromir.

~~~~

Boromir: Three words. Say them and I'm yours. Hobbitess: Three words. Boromir:

~~~~

Boromir: Welcome, fellow idiots Hobbitess: Hello, Boromir Boromir: No, no, not you, you're not an idiot Hobbitess: You underestimate me

#lotr #boromir #the fellowship of the ring #merry brandybuck #pippin took #gandalf the grey #frodo baggins #samwise gamgee #original character #srsly what do we name her

[redbootsindoriath]

I just realized I never posted the pirate AU drawings I did for LOTR.  Shame on me.  These are from like 2020 and I forgot about them.

The Maiar are sea spirits.  Gandalf has chosen to take a mostly-human form but his eyes glow and his ears are shaped like seashells.  Aragorn’s tattoo is the Evenstar necklace from the LOTR movies.  For anyone who asks if there’s any particular significance to Legolas’s necklace, no there isn’t, it’s just a merfolk necklace of some kind.  Also “The Fellowship” is literally a ship.  And it gets sunk when Frodo and Sam leave and Merry and Pippin are kidnapped and Boromir gets shot (with a sea-Uruk flintlock, of course) and all that good stuff.  Speaking of Frodo and Sam...

Also a bonus Bilbo.  In the pirate AU, the hobbits are, appearance-wise, basically the same as they are in canon, but they can hold their breath for much longer than humans can (even for hours if they’re only minimally exerting themselves) which is why Gandalf keeps bringing them on adventures: they’re great at sea travel and all things water-related, whether or not they’ll admit it, and specifically Bilbo was able to swim through the tunnels that the sea serpent Smaug had flooded.

#aragorn #bilbo #boromir #frodo #gandalf #legolas #samwise #the man the myth the legends #beowulf except everybody is short #one shiny #canon is great and all but what if #he's a pirate #my trash #/end classification tags #i knew i'd left out pippin and merry and then i was counting the fellowship here and was like ''i thought there were nine of them...?'' #and after like FOUR SECONDS i went ''gimli!!'' so now i feel badly about leaving him out #to be fair the dwarves basically are identical to their canon selves as well except in pirate outfits and whatnot #but i usually forget to draw gimli anyway and i think it's because i don't have a proper design for him that i really like

[middle-earth-mythopoeia]

1, 3, 6, 10, 13, 16

Thanks for the ask! I’m not sure whether to answer for the Silmarillion or LOTR, so maybe I’ll do both?

The character everyone gets wrong:

For LOTR, I answered this one way here, but there are a lot of other ways to answer it! I also think people get Elladan and Elrohir wrong. This may be a weird hill to die on because they’re small characters in the book, but I HATE how they’re represented in fanon. They’re made into carbon copies of the Harry Potter twins, who I already don’t like (ugh, I hate even mentioning Harry Potter here). I’m a twin myself, and I’m sick of twin characters being shoehorned into the goofy prankster role. It feels like a cheap attempt at comic relief because people don’t know how to write anything else. Especially when it’s just not how Elladan and Elrohir are represented in the book.

For the Silmarillion, I answered this one way here. I think the Weasley twin treatment also gets applied to Amrod and Amras, which is particularly nonsensical because the lives of all the Fëanorians are all extremely dark and tragic (the whole Silmarillion is tragic!). I get that sometimes people want to write happy, funny fanfiction, but can we please let go of the twins-as-wacky-pranksters trope?

Description of the worst take you’ve seen on tumblr:

For LOTR, I answered this another way here. But I wasn’t even thinking of another worst take, which is so bad that I’d erased it from my mind… the idea that the LOTR movies were an improvement on the books. "But nobody thinks this!" you will say. They do, and I’ve seen this take here on tumblr. WE HATES IT! There are good things about the movies (music, sets, acting, costumes, etc.) but literally nothing can come close to the beauty of the books. And besides, the movies deviated from them in many inexcusable ways—it would take to long to even list them all.

For the Silmarillion, one of the worst takes I’ve seen is the idea that Maeglin was really an innocent victim all along who was unfairly slandered by a supposedly biased history. I understand that sometimes it’s interesting to deconstruct the story, but at a certain point you’re just throwing it out the window. I’m not saying you can’t sympathize with him to a degree—he was clearly abused by his father as a child. But then he internalized those lessons—of his father’s possessiveness and violence towards women—and that was how he treated Idril.

I also know there’s a discussion among fans about Maeglin’s race, because earlier drafts described him as swarthy—and it’s certainly problematic for the dark-skinned male character to be the creepy one—but Tolkien’s later drafts described him as pale. So do with that what you will.

Which ships are the most annoying?

I don’t like the prevalence of Thorin/Bilbo. That’s partly because I hate the Hobbit movies, where the pairing mostly comes from, and it’s just not my cup of tea. People should write what they want, of course. I just don’t see the appeal.

For the Silmarillion, Sauron/Celebrimbor. It’s just everywhere, and I’m tired of it. Also, I get that some people are into darker relationships, but a lot of what I’ve seen of the pairing (even though I actively avoid it) is bizarrely romanticized. Like you guys do realize Sauron is evil, right? Even if he literally seduced Celebrimbor, I don’t think he’d be wracked with guilt about anything. People say they like this pairing because it’s dark, but then they turn Sauron into a poor little meow meow full of romantic longing and riddled with guilt because he tortures and kills his lover, and it’s just weird. I don’t think Sauron had romantic feelings for anyone, and I really don’t think he felt bad about torture and murder.

Worst part of fanon:

LOTR: I’m not even sure what LOTR fanon is anymore, probably because I try to ignore it. I guess I don’t like how the movie versions of characters and events have taken over. You know who also gets Weasleyified? Merry and Pippin, and it’s the movies’ fault. It’s not that I don’t enjoy them in the movies to a degree—but some of their best moments in the books were cut out.

The Silmarillion: I don’t even know if I could choose the worst part of fanon. I find Silmarillion fanon particularly frustrating, because in a fanbase where a lot of people don’t know the Silmarillion well, fan interpretations often get passed off as canon. People absorb fanon thinking that it’s canon, and that’s why you get so many posts that say things like, “Wait, I just realized Maglor ISN’T the nice Fëanorian.” (To be clear, I’m not judging people who say this. They’re unlearning fanon, which is good. It’s just a sign that fanon interpretations are taking over too much when you end up with a lot of people having to revise these big misconceptions.)

Ultimately, it’s just frustrating to me that fanon is so prevalent in either the LOTR or the Silmarillion fandom, because the source material is WAY more interesting. I might be swinging a bat at a hornet’s nest by saying all of this—but the asks were meant to be controversial!

You can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc):

For both LOTR and the Silmarillion, I don’t understand why people think Sauron can mind-read. That’s not a thing, but it’s astonishingly prevalent in fan interpretations. The worst part is, I don’t think people realize that mind-reading Sauron is a fan-invented concept.

#asks #Elladan #Elrohir #Amrod #Amras #Maeglin #Sauron #my writing

[stackofturtles]

Ranking the Fellowship in order of trans masc energy

It is well appreciated that Lord of the Rings is incredibly gay but one thing that I rarely see discussed is just how much transmasculine energy so many of the character, particularly in the fellowship, have. At the prompting of my partner asking me which member of the fellowship has the most trans masc energy I have ranked them from least to most trans masc energy. Note that I am specifically pulling from characterization from the books and not any adaptations.

10. Boromir- easily the lest trans masc member. Cis straight guy.

9. Gandalf the White- I’m splitting Gandalf the Grey and White because they’re energies are so different. This one is kind of frustrating because Gandalf’s death and rebirth could be such a great trans metaphor but also Gandalf the White loses so much of his fun and joy and thus his trans masculine energy.

8. Legolas- Legolas is low on they list because, while he is definitely dripping with trans energy, I see Legolas as more of a she/they or nb energy. I’m sure there are some femboy trans mascs who Legolas represents though, that’s fair, I see you, there is just so much trans masc energy on the rest of the list.

7. Gandalf the Grey- fun old bookish man who likes to smoke, we all hope to be him one day, future aspirations for when I am old.

6. Sam- I struggled with where to put Sam on the list but ultimately put him lower than expected because he could go many different ways- trans masc yes, but i get more he/him lesbian vibes from him. He also give me energy like Jack Black- a cis man with uncanny transmasc and/or butch lesbian energy, and there is so much trans masc energy in the fellowship at this point in the list everyone has a lot of it.

5. Aragorn- embodies so postitive masculinity! His trans masc energy is more representing an aspiration of masculinity than it is literal. Also very outdoorsy and a romantic soul. He was one of the crushes I had a teen which was really me just wanting to be him.

4. Pippin- Plucky young trans guy! Definitely has Peter Pan energy. He will absolutely be get carded at the Bar no matter old he gets. Kind of a lovable doofus but he has a big growth arc where we can see his growth mentally and physically cause the Ent Draughts are absolutely a metaphor for testosterone! Also good friends with Faramir who is also a trans man.

3.  Frodo- our protagonist! Adventurous and somewhat studious short guy, its too obvious really. The fact that he gets his big adventure when he is a little older also gives hope to those of us who transitioned in our 30s that we too could can be a plucky young Jim Hawkins style character on an adventure even though we missed it in our youth.

2. Gimli- SPECIFICALLY BOOK GIMILI- FILM GIMILI HAS NO TRANS MASC ENERGY-(love the movies but Jackson did Gimli dirty). That being said he has perfect noble chivalrous trans masc energy, so much positive masculinity to aspire to. And he’s a short king! He is so willing to throw down for the transfems he loves (Galadrial and Leglos) in true trans solidarity.

1. Merry- Are you gonna tell me Meriadoc is not a trans guy name? He is somewhat bookish like Frodo, and definitely the smartest hobbit in the fellowship. Has so much young adventurer vibes without being too much of a doofus like Pippin. Although this is mostly just part of the movies he is a bit of a fancy boy, i know he has a large collection of floral button ups. Eowyn hangs around him while exploring her gender, queer solidarity there. Becomes a knight of Rohan (goals!) and led the uprising of the hobbits again Saruman And as mentioned earlier the Ent Draughts are a metaphor for testosterone!

 @wretched-mog you asked for this!

#lotr #lord of the rings #trans #transman #transmasc