Story time: A (sex) trope conversation with my husband
Y'all want to hear about a hilarious conversation I had with B today?
Of course you do.
So B knew one of the fic authors I follow had posted a new work and I was planning to read it after dinner while he watched some sports ball. Afterward, he asked me how it was and I said, "Eh, kinda disappointing, but for me reasons not for author reasons––the writing was bomb, as usual."
And he was like, "How was it disappointing?"
I explained that the story started right off the bat with the "fuck or die" trope which I'm not typically into because dub/non-con isn't my jam. UNLESS the characters already have a romantic/sexual interest and especially if they are secretly pining for each other and then wracked with guilt in the aftermath for enjoying the circumstances before admitting they've been in love with each other all along. In which case it's
But that was not the case, here.
And B, bless him, was like
"...I think we have fundamentally different ideas of what 'fuck or die' means, can you please explain?"
So I did––gave him a couple examples like biological imperatives or heat/rut, pollen or potions, etc.
And he was like, "Ohhh ok, that is...not what I thought it meant. How did that become a fandom thing? Is that a trope in some major franchise?" he asks.
And I was like "My love. My heart. Are you familiar with STAR TREK?? PON FARR??"
and he was like "Why are you shouting I have no idea what you're talking about."
So then he got an education.
The man has only seen a few episodes of next generation and the more recent movies so had no clue about the deep and abiding fandom fascination with Vulcan biological imperatives. But boy howdy is he now aware.
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s12 destiel from dean's perspective is explanation enough for why dean is sooooo insane after that season. like.
- first he almost kills himself for the greater good or whatever and has to come to terms with like. dying. on purpose. and then he is given the gift of life but before he can be like yay! i can go home! his mom is back from the dead??? and his brother is missing???
- then his mom leaves him bc she wants to figure out who she is and even tho he's like a 38 yo man it fucks w him a lot understandably.
-they get arrested and put in SOLITARY for a while and when they finally get out and meet cas again (at which point dean has once again come to terms with dying for the greater good but also mostly his mom and brother this time), he KILLS THE REAPER THEY MADE THE DEAL WITH AND GETS ALL EMOTIONAL??? after which he proceeds to fuck off bc he is Busy™ tracking lucifer etc.,
- then they get a lead and CAS ALMOST DIES IN FRONT OF HIS EYES and throws an I love you in his goodbye speech for the lolz. which. hahaha. anyway cas lives but turns out his mother — with whom he's trying to connect so badly so he can achieve full Normalcy — was like. lowkey responsible for his almost death. so they're fighting now.
- cas receives a divine voicemail from his close friend and colleague and then they go on that case with Lily sunder and ISHIM BEATS CAS UP AND THREATENS TO KILL HIM and even after they beat him Lily Sunder is like. I'm gonna go do some soul searching and if im in the mood I'll come back and KILL YOU. THREAT. and cas is like 😔 fair. so you know.
- there is also an instance of him losing his memories which is scary. and it's like. being intimately familiar with that experience is. something else. as a memory loss girlie let me tell you 👍🏽😄
- and then!!!!! lucifer's unborn child mind melds with his wifehusband — once more in front of his own two eyes — and "manipulates" him into running away with the pregnant lady instead of staying and Figuring Out A Solution. and when they finally do find cas, they are with them for all of 12 hours before HE DIES. FORREAL THIS TIME. AND LIKE THAT'S IT. NO COMING BACK FROM THAT ONE!
this is not an exhaustive list bc i don't remember everything but. like you know. he was primed to get worse and worse. all things that happen in s12 are out of his control but they are also things that happen in front of his eyes, and in ways that make him think that perhaps he did have control over them and he did fuck up some way and he *should* have done something to change the course of their lives so he's filled with guiltshame about it. and he decides that the solution to not losing anyone in the foreseeable future is to just. Control Every Possible Aspect Of Their Existence. which is impossible and that's why he gets mad all the time but YOU KNOW. YOU CAN SEE WHY HE'S CRAZY. poor s12 dean man.
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Okay, I have been desperately trying to figure out what the blue and yellow means, right? I have been driving myself crazy.
And the other day I saw an edit and I was like "I'm stupid, I'm looking in the wrong place" but I didn't have the time to check this theory until earlier today, and now I'm losing my mind. So for this one, I'm gonna use the fact that they are using the sun on a wall and that they completed the blue and green with Buck and Eddie at the gym scene with the bottle and the towel to assume I am right, and they complete these things with other elements of the scene, wall, decoration, everything.
Okay, so, when tracking the blue and green thing so I could make this post, I kept wondering why there aren't a lot of Henren examples of it, this season has given us a few more examples, but I'm pretty sure there are only these 2 examples before season 7. But like, I didn't think much of it even though I didn't understand why.
But Anna, I thought this was about the blue and yellow, why you talking about the blue and green? Well, I think the blue and yellow is the blue and green for queer couples. Stay with me, I promise I have enough proof to create a reasonable doubt lol.
Okay, so, the other day I saw a henren edit that had their first date and I already had the yellow behind Eddie in my mind and was like, that's interesting, their first date is blue and yellow. So I had that in my head.
Then, someone is making a Karen in every episode series, and I saw a set of her in yellow and was like "wait, I need to stop looking for answers in the straight couples, buddie is a queer couple, I need to see if this is a pattern that has already been established for the other queer couple, do henren have different rules?" and yes, I think they do.
Going back to the blue and green thing for a second, the easiest couple to track the blue and green is madney. Every couple has worn blue and green, but they have been blue and green since their first scene. And while they do wear blue and green for inconsequential scenes, they are in blue and green for things like getting back together in season 6, finding out Jee is a girl, the date after Doug, the hospital after Doug, the whole Boston episode is blue and green in nature, I talk about that in more detail in my blue and green meta if you're interested.
So, assuming they are establishing the blue and yellow with henren in the same way they do the blue and green with madney, blue and yellow in important henren scenes sounded like a nice bet since the blue and yellow is present on their first date, right? And the same way Boston is inherently blue and green, tomorrow is very blue and yellow.
But you don't really think I'm telling you I established a pattern with only one episode, right? Using other elements of the scene, considering the way they are using the sun a lot with buddie, I have quite a few examples, going back down to when they accept that the IVF didn't work and that they'll be okay. I also really like the way the club in fomo is lit in blue and yellow.
But Anna, you are using the wall a lot. Yes, I am using the wall a lot. Why am I using the wall a lot? You know how madney is the guide for the blue and green? Their house is blue and green. Like decorations and stuff. Mostly the kitchen, but still. The detailing there, the pans, the blue chairs, the blue couch. Even Jee's room is greenish.
So, henren's house being yellow works, I think.
Another point towards that is the way that Buck's bi awakening is blue and yellow.
So, I'm gonna go insane and say the blue and yellow thing is the blue and green thing but queer.
But, looking at that and knowing that we are using other elements of the scene, buddie gets interesting. The earliest example I can find with henren is in 3x04 when they are discussing the IVF.
So I'm not gonna look before that BUT let's look after just for fun? So, I talked about the blue and green aspects of the grocery store scene, it's is also yellow, mostly behind Buck, there are yellow flowers on that bouquet next to Eddie. This one is a real stretch tho, I will admit that lol
Is this one a stretch? Maybe, less of a stretch than the grocery store tho.
I like this one, the summer camp scene with this interpretation. And the blue chair, and the building back there.
This one, I need to add this because of the oven and the light behind Eddie, but I admit, it's a stretch, but everything here is a stretch so lol
Poker date tho? We're getting closer lol even more when they are getting their winnings and Buck takes the red jacket off.
Also, the beer, they usually drink the genuine beer, that's yellow, and the coming out scene had a blue labeled beer.
BUT my question is actually about the will reveal. Because this scene is undoubtedly blue and yellow.
So, if I'm right, what does this mean for this scene? Because this scene looks like a love confession, sounds like a love confession, AND was talked about as Eddie saying he loves Buck to the core. I have many questions now. But I will accept this so I can stop thinking about it.
Anyway, this is my current theory on the blue and yellow.
As always, if you read this, I love you 💜
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