#I ALREADY NEEDED SO MUCH THERAPY BECAUSE OF MY ABUSIVE PARENTS I CAN NOT EVEN IMAGINE HOW BAD ITS GONNA BE FOR ADRIEN | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

the-lark-ascending69 · 18 days

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I just got an idea for whump Ronance.

What if Robin and Nancy gets captured by Brenner?

Like, they end up becoming his new lab rats. Thry get tortured and abused just like El was.

What do you think?

(Also, what kind of powers do you think they would have respectively?)

Anon I am so sorry i wrote a long asf response to this and then it got deleted and I was so mad I didn't want to do it again but now I feel inspired and motivated to give it another try.

SO. Wonderful concept! I love it! Let me share my thoughts!!

So what I came up with is:

At age 15, they both get lost in the Upside Down. They only vaguely knew about the other's existance from school but when they found each other down there, they became inseparable. This is an AU in which Will never went missing. Anyway they're terrified and starving and exhausted but at least they have each other, and they hold hands almost the entire time because they both desperately need the comfort.

Eventually, they make it out on their own after finding a gate... and it's in the Hawkins Lab. They come out on the other end before the unbelieving eyes of dozens of scientists, who were convinced no one would survive a minute in there without the proper equipment. Yet these trembling, starving young girls covered in grit survived with only the clothes on their back for a week.

Brenner recognizes them immediately - Nancy and Robin, the two girls from the missing person posters circulating through town. Everyone already thinks they're dead. They made fake bodies of them, for Christ' sake, he's not letting this opportunity go, especially after the disappearance of his only remaining test subject, 011.

This will be a new experiment. A different one. They are given different numbers for ir - A01 for Nancy and A02 for Robin. They get that tattooed in their arms. The purpose of the experiment is to study the effects of short-term exposure to the Upside Down on humans of their height, s.ex, age, health status and weight. They call themselves doctors. They give them separate rooms and run a series of tests daily on them. They try to be subtle at first as to not scare them too much - they don't want another 011 - so they call them by their real names for a while. They ask questions about their lives before the Upside Down and reassure them this is meant to test radiation levels - a standard procedure, before they can return them to their parents.

They immediatelly call bullshit. Why can't they talk to their parents now? Why can't they see them through a glass, at least, or a camera, if radiation is what they're worried about? Why won't they tell them what that place was or why it led back to the Lab? Do their families know they're safe? What is going on? They ask so many questions about every procedure ran on them, resisting in more and more extreme ways until the scientists need to tie them down and drug them whenever they want to do anything.

Brenner notices similar brain activity in them to that of his old test subjects, and he suspects the Upside Down might have given them some kind of ability. He keeps them in the rainbow room, hoping each other's company will help them develop their powers, yet for a long time nothing comes. They can't move objects with their mind, or astral project, or open gates. Even despite everything they do to them. Despite every horrible procedure they perform on them. Drugs of all kinds, leaving them delirious and weak for days. Electrocompulsive therapy. Hypnosis. Pain tests. Sensory deprivation. Solitary confinement. Brenner wants to activate their powers in one way or another, desperate after losing subject 011.

(It's terrifying each time. Nancy is invaded by pure rage while Robin is paralyzed by fear. Whenever they take one for a procedure, the other waits impatiently for her return, fully concious of what they're doing to her - or so it seems. Nancy, at least, thinks she knows what they're doing to Robin. She thinks they do the same things they do to her - tie her to a chair, put an IV in her, maybe, or stick a needle into her neck. Brenner will do this while casually telling her she'll only feel a small pinch, before doing such a monstruosity to her that she'll be woken up by seizures at night. It takes Robin some time to tell Nancy the truth).

They seem completely useless for a long time, but that changes the moment they capture a russian agent.

He was a scientist, working from an unknown location beneath Hawkins, trying to get intel from the Lab when he was caught and tortured to extract information from him. Robin wasn't usually allowed to wander the halls alone, but someone left the door unlocked and she was curious, and soon she found herself in front of a closed door, hearing panting and ragged breathing after this man received the beating of his life. He was talking to himself - curses and meanderings about death and whether or not he'd see his family again. Robin, despite having never learned Russian, understood everything, and in a perfect accent she began to talk to him. She didn't know why - she didn't even realize they weren't speaking English. For a moment he thought he was being rescued, and he shared with her a lot of information.

Brenner caught her in the act and severaly punished her. Solitary confinement for one week. She would only see other people when they ran tests on her, and even then they wouldn't speak to her at all. He ended up not living up to his threat when, not two days after the event, he noticed her brain activity going wild. He has fascinated, and he asked her what had happened, if that russian spy gave her something like a drug. "Russian?" she asks, only then understanding what had happened.

They believe her powers are related to xenoglossy, the supernatural ability to know a language without having ever learned it. Something extremely useful in that specific historical context. She'd be an incredible spy, and oh, Brenner can't wait to experiment with this. They kill the spy after she tells them everything he told her.

They begin to give her a special treatment over Nancy - not exactly for the better. Brenner wants to understand this new ability, developed not in the womb like in other subjects but when subject A02 is a teenager, possibly caused by exposure to Upside Down radiation, though that's not confirmed. Maybe it had more to do with their experiments. He thinks he hit a dead end when it's revealed Robin already knew intermediate-to-advanced French, Spanish and Italian from before being captured - she'd be just a regular poltglot in that case, a prodigious one, right, but with nothing of interest for Brenner. But he quickly realizes this is not the case. Robin didn't know a word of Russian before, and he develops a hipothesis he'll spend the following year testing. He tries her ability with different languages, escaling on rarity, complexity and distance from English. From reading a single short text, Robin becomes profient in Finnish - a non-indoeuropean language Brenner doubts she's ever had any contact with. Proficient, but not fluent. It seems like she can very easily extract a language's grammar from a short sample text, applying it to terms she's familiar with, but she can't magically "guess" vocabulary of grammatical rules not present in the material she was given. For example, by reading a text in which all 15-16 grammatical cases of Finnish are present, she will be able to apply them to any noun in nominative case she knows, but she can't do it with nouns she doesn't know, and she can't use grammatical cases not present in the sample text given to her. She also can't guess spelling or pronunciation without both text and audio samples, and she can't speak in accents she hasn't heard (though she can easily switch accents in a way native speakers of the language can't, a skill that is curiously not translated (lol) into her native English). She learns faster with audio than with text, but even faster with a real-time conversation. Brenner brings a colleague who is fluent in Japanese to test her and he's amazed by how quick her progress is. His hipothesis, seemingly now proven, was that hers was an entirely mental skill, not a supernatural one, since she doesn't magically have access to languages she never had any contact with. This would make her ability not real xenoglossy.

A few more fun facts about her "power":

Her pre-existing skill with Spanish, French and Italian didn't improve until she was exposed to these languages again after being captured. She becomes incredibly skilled at solving puzzles and cracking codes. Brenner believes her power developed thanks to her intensive studies in languages through her childhood. Her brain activity is similar to that of non-native speakers of a language during the few first minutes of having contact with a new language, but in less than an hour, it will be the same as with native speakers. She's confused by some reconstructed languages, but not others (Proto-Indoeuropean was easy for her to learn, Proto-Uralic took her some time before learning more finno-ugric languages than just Finnish. If this were happening in the 2000s, when the Dené-Caucasian theory was already formalized, then Proto-Dené-Caucasian would have sounded like absolute gibberish to her).Some of Brenner's colleages hipothesize that her knowledge of living languages help inform her of the grammar and syntax of proto-languages in an extremely accurate way, to the point she subconciously knows when a reconstruction is wrong. This would make her an amazing paleolinguist. Brenner is less interested in the reconstruction of ancient turkic languages in Siberia and more interested her use as a spy and code-breaker - though it wouldn't have hurt him to take a second look at the idea of turkic languages, because that Russian agent, he was from a region of Russia called Tartary, and he spoke another language aside from Russian, the Tartar language, though he never got to speak it in Robin's presence. Brenner and his colleagues, not familiar with the vast diversity of languages on Earth, spend a long time working with an incorrect hypothesis because they couldn't notice Robin speaking Tartar to herself as a distinct language from all the others they were teaching her. A year and a a half passes before someone spent enough time listening to her to notice the difference. It's a discovery that shatters completely Brenner's first hypothesis on the absence of a supernatural element in Robin's ablity, and he's once again fascinated when he discovers it. His new hypothesis: Robin's power grants her access to a person's mind through speaking to them in a strange, confusing way, and he can't wait to destroy her, pick her brain apart and figure out how it works even if he kills her in the process.

In fact, he does. Literally. He does it over and over and over again, and Nancy has to watch it happen time and time again.

Because here's the thing: Robin wasn't the only one to develop powers, and in fact, she wasn't even the first one.

If you've heard of the videogame Life is Strange, anon, then you'll understand Nancy's power here: she can rewind time. Her power is pretty much the same as Max's in LiS - she can rewind time up to a certain point, though it causes a great mental strain, and eventually, she will discover she can time travel to specific points in time through photographs she's present in, as her younger self.

She discovers her powers the first time Robin is killed.

Misbehavior got her punished - solitary confinement after a long testing session. She had an overdose in her cell, and no one noticed in time. Nancy barely remembers what happened then, other than the horror she felt, before the events of the day flashed backwards before her eyes and she was brought back to Robin - warm, alive, breathing - in the rainbow room.

She begged her to do as they said, to behave, to not fight back. Robin is confused but Nancy is in tears and she agrees to do as she says.

This time, when she has an overdose, they treat her on time. She was in a comma for a week, but soon she was back on her feet and back in Nancy's arms.

It keeps happening - over and over again. The time she swallowed her own tongue during a seizure because Nancy didn't hold her right, and she had to try over four times (and watch her choke and die four times) before she got it right. The time she didn't die - but she lost her ability to speak after hours of electroculpulsive therapy, and she had her fake an illness so they would submit her to less aggressive procedures. It happened again when, after a similar trial, she forgot her own parents and thought the scientists were her parents. But she mostly just died. Over, and over, and over again. Mostly from overdose or brain damage during seizures, but one time, she was purposely asphixiated during a test. To this point Nancy still isn't sure what was it that they wanted to test with that. She suspects it was just torture for the sake of torture. To break her, somehow.

Nancy is terrified of long-term effects of all of this on Robin's health. She's scared the damage will cross the point of no return too early, to a point she can't go back to, a point in which she can't stop it. She can hold Robin's head during a seizure but she can't stop the seizures, and the lasting damage they leave.

Robin is aware of Nancy's powers. Nancy didn't even have to prove them to her - she believed her immediately whe she told her, and she trusts her judgment completely. If Nancy tells her it's better to do X, you can bet Robin will be doing X. Robin doesn't tell Nancy about her newfound ability immediately - she doesn't want her to worry about something she can do nothing about. But she does share it with her, after some time. She felt the need to explain to Nancy why the sudden interest on her. Nancy worries about her Robin so much, so so much, because she's just become Brenner's favorite new toy, and he'll do anything and everything to exploit her. She's in much more danger than Nancy is, and Nancy wishes she could take her place, make herself into Brenner's toy, draw attention away from Robin, but they both know the best they can do for their safety is to keep Nancy's invisible power secret. Nancy hates herself for not being able to take Robin's pain for her.

They escape one day. It's a complicated plan including short-distance time travel, manipulating russian spies through a stolen radio, several forms of treason and going out the same way they came in - through the portal. Nancy does her best to keep them safe with her power as they search for the other gate, the one they first crossed three years ago. And then, they're out. They're found unconcious on the side of the road.

They wake up a few days later in the hospital, surrounded by their families. Nancy's brother, Mike, has a new friend - a quiet girl with long brown hair and a 011 tattoed on her wrist, and she knows she needs to speak to her desperately, but she's exhausted, so for the time being, she'll sleep for some time, feeling almost at peace now, knowing Robin is safe and in the good hands of doctors.

#ronance #whump #tw torture #tw drugs #tw electrocution #uuuh that's it i guess #this took me forever to write but i'm satisfied!

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stackofpossums · 6 months

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Could I get a Hc for how the M6 would react to finding out Mc's past is worse than they thought? Like finding the shop is the point their life goes from awful to okay to eventually great. Before then? You can leave it as vague as you'd like.

(I have an Mc who was an executioner/pet similar but different from Muriels executioner/gladiator role being Their scars are from the person in charge and all their opponents were never given a chance. Another Mc who tried to live up to others expectations for him. Eventually forced to leave his home or die at 10 because his sister tried to murder him for a power he didn't even want. My third Mc who had abusive parents and learned from a passing by sparrow that they need to run away to save themselves.

What if before the shop Mc's life was actually horrible? So like to the point they never told anyone, not even Asra. Only telling stories about after they had moved to the shop to live with their aunt.)

I just finished a big assignment so Mc who has a dark past let's go:

Asra: He already knew MC past was dark and was kind of glad they didn't have to remember that when they lost their memories. Then they got their memory back. And oh. OH. He never knew it was this bad. At first, he's a little upset that MC never felt safe enough to confide in him. He quickly realizes, "No, it wasn't him." He's grateful MC chose to confide in him now, and he's going to do everything in his power to support them. He'll hold them and comfort them while they talk if MC is comfortable with that. The salamander has already lit the stove so he can brew some calming tea. Therapy has been scheduled. He is fully committed to helping MC heal as much as possible, mostly out of love, but there's a tiny part of him that feels guilty for not knowing sooner.

Julian: He thought he had it bad. He didn't know it could be this bad. He may be a doctor, but... for quite possibly the first time in his life, he knows he isn't qualified to fix this. He's gonna set MC up with the best mental health care. Until then, he's going to attempt to theraptize them himself. He encourages MC to talk not only about their past but also about how it made them feel, how they're feeling now, what challenges they are having, and anything and everything else they want to share. He's going to respond with hella words of affirmation, making sure MC knows how much he cares about them and that their safe now.

Nadia: Patiently listens to MC's story, no matter how gruesome the details are. She'll hold them tightly when it becomes too much for them to bear. There are no words to describe the hurt she feels for them to her very core. Afterward, she is setting them up with the best mental health support money can buy. Only the best therapists, medications, if MC wants to try them, or anything else. Anything MC thinks will help them is theirs. No expense is too great for her beloved MC. She's pretty venengeful, though. It'll be tough to convince her not to make the lives of anyone who's made MC suffer hell. She'll relent eventually, though, because she's knows if MC doesn't want that, it won't be helpful.

Muriel: Out everyone here, he understands it the most. It's a little hard for him to listen sometimes because he remembers times in his life where he felt just as hopeless as MC. He's here for MC, though, and makes it his mission to make sure MC NEVER feels that way again. He shares the techniques he's found for dealing with trauma, as well as helps MC find what works for them. He pushes them to keep going when he notices they are struggling. He comforts them when it's too much. He celebrates with them for every challenge they overcome, no matter how "small." It's the least he can do for them after everything they've done for him.

Portia: When MC first opens up about their past, their a bit afraid they're going to get squeezed to death by Portia's hugs. She's the other LI mostly likey to try to go after the people's who hurt her precious MC, she solves problems with fists flying. But that's okay. She's sneaky. She's going to make sure anyone who hurt MC wakes up to a fun surprise. Other than that, MC can always count on Portia for a listening ear. She will comfort MC through any story they need to tell and wants to help them find closure however she can.

Lucio: Oh. Oh no. No one gets to hurt his MC. No one. Who shall he defeat in battle for you? That won't help? Oh... well... what can he do? Lucio would do ANYTHING to make things better for MC. Just say the word. Hugs, he's here. No hugs? That's fine, too. He's here to listen. He knows a thing or two about unpleasant pasts. But you have each other now. MC has had his back despite everything he's done. It would be criminal not to do the same.

#lissy's headcanons #lissy answers #I hope you like pain #the arcana #the arcana game #the arcana headcanons #the arcana hc #the arcana asra #asra alnazar #the arcana julian #julian devorak #the arcana nadia #nadia satrinava #the arcana muriel #the arcana portia #portia devorak #the arcana lucio #lucio morgasson

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decolonize-the-left · 3 months

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I think that a lot of the adult "immaturity" is result of being abused by the family structure and capitalism so growing up into some agency allowing certaint comforts. Then having to challenge some comfortable established belief, aspect, themself or lifestyle poses a struggle they aren't willing to engage in if at possible as it frequently seemingly has no reward outside of their current comfort.

I think when youths are liberated the concept of "immaturity" will be largely replace by a more accurate term because we have adults less "mature" than children because of the absurdity of it. It's like lazyness it's not a thing but a situation. Idk this a ramble now, but appreciated you broaching the topic of adult "immaturity'" publicly

1000% I agree & I don't like the terms I'm using, but they're what we've got. Someone else sent an ask about what "child traits" are for the same exact reason.

Also no it's okay ramble, that's all I do, watch this.

I think the way we discuss minors/kids/YA/maturity entirely needs to change tbh, but not in a child wife way, before someone says that.

They're robbed of a ton of autonomy, are raised to be workers, and then are thrust into adulthood with no teaching about the Real, actual world. They're treated like 2nd class citizens and are the only people I can think of who you can still legally assault. We belittle everything they do as less important and then wonder why everyone needs therapy as adults.

I was more critical thinker than my parents by 8 and more capable than both parents by 12. This isn't a flex because I was too smart. At all. My parents should have had more skill than I did. They were capable of it, I assure you. By their own circumstances they just weren't able to access it.

But this goes back to capitalism and broader mental health and family resources because they also weren't raised with Google and didn't have gentle parenting TikTok or free zoom classes to join. I don't think we even had healthcare growing up so it's not like they had access to a lot of methods to improve themselves outside traditional reading BUT both parents worked too and they were already too fucked up and in their ways to even be interested in a self help book lol so like?? Realistically and in reality that didn't happen. They were thrown out as teens as had to work to support Me very quickly. Then had 2 more.

Like you said; lifestyle and having no reward. They didn't seek out being better people cuz it doesn't pay the bills.

And I know that isn't entirely their fault, but they are Still responsible for how they handled the hand they were dealt. Me and my siblings deserved better regardless of their background ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But I can be compassionate and understanding too in that I know if they had the Actual opportunity to heal and resources to be good parents then at least at the very least they could have been.

And like I said, as a person who does try for my daughter I get it's hard and it is unfair that I can't catch a break, but that's the way it is. And yeah it is harder for me than it would be for a lot of other people and it's not especially easy to begin with. BUT I also don't work cuz I'm disabled so I have a lot of time to do it that others don't.

You're right. I don't know if immature is the best word to use for this but idk what is.

What's the word for state sanctioned generational trauma?

Cuz not providing more resources given the world is much more than just ableism or not caring enough about families. It's like they're creating people like this on purpose which is I think is more fucked up. But hey, who else would they hire for as cheap as prison labor if everyone was making good choices amirite? 🤧

#asked #answered #is this tmi? idk #i have so many feelings about this as an abused former foster kid and now co-parenting a school age kid #i believe so much in liberation of youth and families yall dont even know

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alexiethymia · 1 year

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The poetic cinema that it was Mr. Ji’s inkblot he made in anger which caused Chi yeol to discover that he was the one who kidnapped Haeyi and the fact that the first episode dealt with a mostly harmless stalker while the dangerous stalker was by his side all along.

Love or hate the murder plot, I do love the twists, not necessarily with regard to the suspect or motivation, but how it’s a scathing social commentary. Because wow, it really is the adults who are the most reprehensible, huh? Because kids absorb everything around them like a sponge, but adults should know better.

And Mr. Ji, as much as I would love to hate him, I really can’t because he is far too tragic. He’s no mastermind. All of his crimes have been sloppy. Even his choice of weapon - a slingshot and not a gun - show that a part of him is still that abused kid, like his anger and his impulses and the way he can change his devotion to hatred at the betrayal he feels toward Chiyeol. The adults around him really screwed him and his sister over. Even when his sister wanted to do the right thing, all she got from it was abuse. And it’s really dangerous that this kind of abuse is being normalized when justified that it’s for grades or the future of the kid. The adults screwed him up so badly that he could only trust a single adult, and fixated on him in a way to have a connection with his sister. I’m sure he became obsessively protective because of the residual guilt he felt at not being able to save his sister on time. If he had gotten therapy or the support he needed back then, even after he had killed his parent, would he have had a chance to heal alongside Chiyeol now?

The parallels are heavy with Mr. Ji, Seung-jae, and Su-a, and again it is a tragedy that the adults around them pushed them to the brink. Although there was still an element of choice because Mr. Ji still chose to kill his mother and others, I guess Seung-jae had what Mr. Ji and even his sister didn’t have at the time. Seung-jae would have gone the same route if he wasn’t pulled back.

And it’s really refreshing to me this emphasis on found family. It’s not necessarily that blood family is automatically bad, but you shouldn’t let preconceived notions and moral superiority cloud your judgment to the point that you’re already seriously damaging your child because you think you’re doing what’s ‘best’ for them. It’s refreshing to me that Haeng-seon wasn’t submissive towards her sister and was rightly mad because Haeyi is her daughter not anyone else’s. Same with Jaewoo. I’m glad they’re not going to push the redemption arc for their eldest sister just because she’s ‘blood’.

Another refreshing thing about this episode which I didn’t expect but really loved is the communication between Haeng-seon and Chiyeol. Chiyeol takes her concerns seriously because of course she would know Haeyi best. And I really didn’t expect it because most kdramas would have the lead keep it as a secret (another source of danger and misunderstanding), but I love, love, that Chiyeol was genuinely honest about the proof he found about Mr. Ji. I’m sure that even if Haeng-seon thought that Mr. Ji hated her, she didn’t expect him to go that far.

Another reason why I like the murder plot is because I prefer this as a source of tension rather than the usual break-up, miscommunication, long-distance, timeskip plots that usually happen during these final episodes. I would prefer my ship to be communicating as they hurdle outside obstacles together.

#crash course in romance #found family #family feels #ramblings about kdramas #tbf I do love the tropes #suspicious partners is an absolute fave #and it had both the murder AND breakup plot #kdramas

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langernameohnebedeutung · 9 months

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I know, I know it might be the algorithm and all but I'm actually disturbed by how much content I see on places like Instagram, reels of couples talking about how your partner is toxic if they're not letting you have access to their phone, don't give you the code to their devices (Clearly they have something to hide!!!!) if they're spending time with (respectively) male/female friends on their own or if they're going out - and I don't think it's a coincidence that the vast majority are explicitly or implicitly about women being 'toxic' if they don't give their boyfriend access to their social media or have male friends or go out on parties or have female friends (!) (because apparently female friends will sabotage the relationship aka tell her that her boyfriend is a controlling manipulative knob). One woman bragged about how her boyfriend sends her photos and locations every several minutes on vacation to show her that he's just with the boys and that this is beautiful and normal and 'see, your relationship can be this healthy, too! Don't take less!' <3<3<3<3<3<3 Yesterday I saw a guy talking about how if he pays more for stuff like rent or food or sth, he has a right that his girlfriend delete her social media presence entirely.

it's 'they read my message at 10:15 am and haven't responded!!!!!'/'they were online on social media A but didn't respond to me on social media B!!!'/'they received so-and-so many snaps!!!' culture meeting toxic relationship meeting heteronormative stereotypes and relationship models meeting using therapy language for manipulation meeting 'men and women cannot be friends' meeting you have to be online and available 24/7 meeting parental child-tracking devices NOW FOR ADULTS meeting abusive partners hiding AirTags in your car (but now guilt-tripping you into taking them with you) meeting women are a passive resource that is accessible to any man talking to her for long enough.

It's basically turning relationships into a dystopia of their own where you can track your s/o like a fuckin Tamagotchi (and if they don't let you, they are the evil wrongdoers who are hurting you!). You cannot escape work anymore, you grow up controlled by your family, you're under constant supervision of whatever loser tiktoker happens to walk by you - and now even your relationship is being turned into a hyper-controlled space. Not to be dramatic, but that's another space - the most private and most intimate space for most people's lives - that is no longer private or personal and no longer in their hands.

And I think most of us adults are still analogue enough to see how toxic it is (except abusers will definitely see how useful it is to tell their SO that this is normal) - but you also have kids growing up and bombarded with this content telling them that this is normal and healthy and that they have a right to track their partner like they purchased GirlFriend Premium PlusPlusPlus and are now owed (and it's so healthy and normal and good!) access to their partner 24/7.

And there is also the simply matter of what it does to relationships if the demon of 'cheating' is constantly, constantly, constantly in the room without reason. It's pushing a culture where you treat your partner like they've already cheated - for no reason. Where the default of your relationship is treating your partner like that. Which is something that hurts you and hurts them. This is like becoming randomly obsessed with the idea that your partner might be stealing money from your purse or has a second family hidden away somewhere. It's basically setting yourself up to look for something that doesn't match up or feeling betrayed if your partner simply...wants a moment of privacy. Privacy and some alone-time is a very central human need. One that in our current time is losing a lot of ground which means that most of our secrecy is now happening in our private lives (someone made a post on here about how young people e.g. are more likely to shut their curtains and stuff). But if you now hivemind the kids into the belief that every person is per default a cheater and under constant obligation to prove otherwise (guilty unless proving innocent at all times), that's another piece of privacy disappearing and it's putting a giant strain on your relationship - basically setting it up to fail and do you both a lot of mental damage.

#I don't know how widespread this shit is in real life bc that's not my generation luckily #but it terrifies the shit out of me #this is going to get people (especially women) killed

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generalchelseamayhem · 11 months

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Unpopular Opinion: "Men suffer from toxic (you know what goes here) and Women suffer from sexism" is a fancy way of saying women are allowed to snap from trauma, whereas men should blame themselves and make sure they're never a danger to anyone else.

And boy, does society love that last one. Victim blaming at its finest.

This ask hits kind of a personally relevant note for me, so apologies if this is longer than you expected.

I think there's some kind of logic behind this, like people will say this about a woman on the assumption that she has exhausted every possible avenue of help, and found no help forthcoming, whereas they will say the other thing about a man on the assumption that help has been offered to him and he flatly refused to take it. Men will do anything rather than go to therapy! etc. etc.

And I think what this misses is the ways that everyone, including these same people, can even unknowingly disincentivise men from actually getting help.

I haven't told anyone I know IRL about this, but yesterday, I started therapy. It's costing me money out of my own pocket because Medicare only covers about 65% of the full price of an appointment—and that's if you've already gone to a GP and paid more money to get a referral. I digress. The point is, every single one of my friends I opened up to about my problems was like "Dude. Seek help. Now." It kinda made me feel ashamed for opening up about my problems in the first place, to anyone other than a trained professional. Yes, there was also a 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th place, so I can understand how it might have been hard to deal with, but the feeling remained.

Eventually, it reached the point where I could no longer justify my "self-improvement using only myself" regimen against my punishingly restrictive budget. Not only because my ability to cope reached an end, but because my budget finally got a bit more relaxed. So I listened to my friends and booked an appointment with my GP, then with a psychologist she referred me to.

First impressions are everything, and I have to be frank, I don't think I built much of a rapport with this guy. But the main issue was—

If you've ever had mental health issues, what's the one thing that always prevents you from seeking help?

Correct, that your problems are tiny and not worthy of consideration next to the grand scale of human suffering. Why should the psychologist be helping you, when there are actively suicidal people or people in prison or abuse survivors, all with way worse problems than you, whom he could be helping instead?

People around you will insist that all mental health struggles are valid, that there isn't, like, a minimum standard for how desperate you need to feel before you seek help.

I wasn't really sure how to start, so I just told him the story of what happened to me during the pandemic. The way my ex and I drifted apart, the way I sacrificed some of my needs during that time to make sure hers were met, the financial pressure I felt from my parents cajoling me into buying a house, other seemingly close friends (at least 3 of them?) ghosting me without the slightest explanation.

And all he could say at the end, when I'd run out of things to talk about, was "What do you want me to do here?"

I can understand why a question like that might be asked in therapy settings, but hearing it so bluntly like that... it genuinely made me feel like my problems were insignificant on a scale I hadn't imagined. It was said in a way that suggested there was nothing here for us to latch onto, nothing for us to improve upon, just me whining about stuff that happened ages ago. It hurt.

Obviously I didn't have much of an answer to give. If I knew what to do about the things that were making me feel sad, I would have done them myself without paying $60 for a middle-man to tell me to do them. Broadly speaking, I would like the bad feelings to go away and my awkward behaviour in certain situations to stop! Was that not obvious? You're the expert! If you listened to me talk for 40 minutes and you don't think there's a clear and obvious way forward, what does that say about the scope and severity of my problems?

I don't think I'll stick with this guy. My point here is, I think people should be a lot more careful about recommending therapy to men, because they can be so careless about dismissing men's problems out of hand with the other side of their mouth. Whether that takes the form of mocking people for male tears, or chastising them because women aren't your therapists and can't be expected to perform that kind of emotional labour, or any other of a number of subconscious biases that still insist "Your problems aren't actually real."

To be quite honest, I don't even think therapy will be a productive avenue for me. That kind of thing never factors into these conversations though, and I think that's because a lot of "men need therapy" discourse is entirely performative.

#for mental health purposes #men's issues #toxic masculinity #ask

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dantedeservedbetter · 1 year

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I don’t think anyone understands just how much I want origin stories of everyone else in Mystreet like they all have really interesting backgrounds that are just tossed to the side of the main plot points (lol abt to be a really long threat again sorry)

Aaron- Didn’t actually get character lore OR a personality until S3 but like I want MORE because tbh I feel like his parents gave him a lot more trauma than what’s shown in the series, and even the stuff IN the actual seasons (the emotional neglect, his military schooling, the tense relationship w/Melissa etc;) are fixed and shoved off like no he might ACTUALLY need therapy bruh PLEASE

Katelyn- I think she was (?) in therapy in the beginning for her anger issues and the loss of her mother but like it was kind of forgotten about tbh. I think she needs more positive moments in the series honestly bc in the later seasons we’re shown she’s partially abusive towards Travis the first time they went out, and ends up being written off as prejudice towards werewolves bc of past experiences??? Naw the Katelyn I know would never do that. AND HER DREAMS OF WORKING IN THEATRE TOO HELLO??? Also, her mom quite literally used her in the Forever Potion experiments as a child?? I feel like that’s important to her character too :/

The Ro’meave Brothers- I don’t actually know where to start tbh because I feel like ALL THREE of them could use some kind of character depth aside from Dumb Blonde, Emo One, and the Forgotten One. Especially Vylad, probably having to witness this entire Lycan situation grow from an outsiders perspective with no contact from his family in forever. It’s shown that Zane is immensely interested in the family business too like hello??? Garroth himself is kind of just written off as a comedic effect most of the time, but he quite literally has no other goals (possibly because he KNOWS he’s going to inherit the business one day whether he cares to or not).

Laurance- He’s not really a character anymore, but from what we’ve actually SEEN in Mystreet he had enough development to become something outside of a potential love interest for Aphmau. He has a fondness for cooking and was seen to be EXCEPTIONAL at it, and I think he still carried an interest in baseball (or idk it was SOME sport asdfghjk the point is he was good). And he was also shown to still help out his family here and there (babysitting Caleb, his baby brother, in numerous episodes). Idk, I feel like there were so many pieces of Laurance that could’ve been explored and touched upon and we hardly got anything. Also… Garrance. Quite literally hate to be that person but it was literally the biggest piece of queerbaiting I’ve ever seen fr I wish it was explored as much as Aarmau was :( (willing to bet the popularity had something to do with what I call the ‘Heartstopper’ treatment but that’s just me tho)

Nana (KC)- The most under appreciated character in-universe I actually had to go and make a separate post about this LOLOL expect it in like five minutes from now bc I just save everything in my drafts.

Travis- Lol no surprise here but him too dude honestly I have no idea where to start with him atm, his entire family’s lore needs a full in depth analysis on themselves because Aphmau’s series just BARELY touches the surface of Travis’s character

Dante/Gene- Honestly BOTH of them were done so dirty I find it funny how no one ever talks abt it because they’re so beautiful to me. Gene already had his redemption arc so I can kind of see why they just tossed him aside but Dante literally had nothing tbh. He had a messy relationship with KC in PDH and then made that same mistake in LLP. Okay, cool, give us more of that. Let him learn from his mistakes and be self aware now. Or better yet let him grow without tossing love interests into the formula in order for it to happen!! Seems like his family life is pretty good though, worst thing abt him was the peanut allergy.

Lucinda- Queen actually has very little to no background that actually centers around her. We know she had a really bad relationship with Ivan but like I’m pretty sure that’s it.

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childlikegoblinqueen · 5 months

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SCOM Writing Notes: Because it came up in comment.

So regarding Willow's emotional break. A few prompted by a comment from @immortalmint ! I wanted to address it here because I thought they were important to the narrative.

Because there's a few spoilers, I am putting it below the veil.

TW for some very frank discussions on mental health, pregnancy depression and anxiety, and some other stuff regarding parental illnesses.

Also, the next chapter's track!

Willow talks a lot about feeling like a vessel and having her voice taken away from her while everyone discusses what's best for her.

The whole idea of Willow's body and emotional condition being discussed without her is something that hits VERY close to home. There's a lot of nuance to how --- but in terms of pregnancy, I remember heading to my many appointments in my third trimester and feeling like I was donating my body to science. I would try to explain to the Drs how I felt like I had no place in my life and my pregnancy, and they would kind of blink at me like ... (what?) I have a hard time believing I am the first person who ever said that to them? I was in desperate need of therapy and I really had to seek it out myself. The refrain of "YOU'RE PREGNANT WITH TWINS! YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? WHY AREN'T YOU HAPPY?" was a lot. My body and mind were unraveling and I didn't understand WHY. There's a big need of emotional support in regular medicine. A lot of folks go into the field and CAN do the job, but they are not really capable of the bedside manner needed. I also dealt with this throughout my parents' illnesses. I would try to explain to palliative care Drs WHY my mother, for instance was in need of anti depressants (SHE'S SICK AND HER PROGNOSIS IS NOT GOOD!) And I would get confused looks and answers like "But I don't understand why she's depressed? Why is she experiencing anxiety?" Really?

2. Willow discusses how she feels awful that looking at pictures of her own childhood is so different to these new glimpses of Hunter's very bleak childhood.

I know I've mentioned this before, but a lot of this is inspired by children who have grown up in the spotlight by association, or who have experienced neglect and abuse in the public eye, but it might not have been seen that way until much later in their lives. SCOM Hunter has no interest in being famous, but he's a perfect target for paparazzi. Often (and I know in other countries -- the UK is brutal) the tabloid media treats abuse survivors -- not the best. I think about how the interest seems to be more on the abuse and not the recovery -- or privacy -- or how easily it can fall into victim blaming. Willow states that she loved Hunter before she realized what it meant to love someone who had been through what he had been through. And of course she loves ALL of him, but having to see these moments of his childhood on display when she's shopping for her Rx elixirs at the local store is beyond invasive. Even worse is that she's aware that folks look at him as complicit in his own abuse. ("He willingly used a branding glove, and now he claims sigils are bad?" "He was sitting next to Belos at a petrification! He was just staring! Clearly he felt no remorse!")

3. Vee' admission that she blames herself for Hunter being in danger.

Vee harbors a TON of guilt that Hunter is going to face retribution for massaging the truth during the trials to keep anyone from knowing that she's alive and living her best life in the HR. There's a lot of love between them, and she's already lost "siblings" in Three and Four. She has no idea what happened to them post escape and has to assume the worse. But since the trials, she's discovered that Hunter has been called a liar and though he told the truth about his observations re: The Coven Heads and Kikimora as well as a few other things that were contributed to the outcome of the trials. His mind had been invaded so many times that he can't give any memory photos anymore -- but when it came to his answer on the whereabouts of the basilisks, he tells the Inquisitors that he doesn't know the whereabouts of any basilisks currently residing on the Boiling Isles.

It isn't a LIE but if the trials are reopened and Hunter is questioned and anything he says comes into question -- it could open the door to the trio getting a retrial and being freed.

And obviously, there is NO way Hunter will sell Vee out.

#the owl house #hunter noceda #toh fanfic #sweet child o mine #spotify #toh hunter #willow park #willow x hunter #a03 fanfic #huntlow #vee toh #vee noceda #vee and hunter are siblings #Spotify

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httplvki · 1 year

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brahms character ramble/explanation/analysis? idk i just love talking abt him cause he and billy lenz are my current hyperfixations

i believe that brahms can be helped when it comes to his mentality and his situation (unlike other slashers i like). he was spoiled through and through by his parents, and there was never any discipline when it came to raising little boy brahms. he was an only child and was mostly put away from society and only had emily cribbs as his “friend” until he killed her when he was just a little boy. not being taught any consequences and or discipline; because of this brahms never really learned why he couldn’t do the things he did because either way, his parents still indulged him no matter what. making brahms a very controlling and selfish human being; what he wants, he will get no matter what. controlling his parents made them kill themselves because they had enough of brahms.

parenting is hard, including if you are an older person taking care of a child in general and it would be even harder to raise a child thats “not like other kids”. mr and mrs heelshire would indulge brahms because he was their only child and the only heir of the wealthy family. they seem like they have never put their foot down or made the rules themselves, making brahms think he can take control of everything that happens in the house and other people (and he did). and also not respecting boundaries; i like to think he has the mindset of “what’s yours is also mine.” we can see that he does not have boundaries when it comes to other people just by him stalking greta and also stealing/rummaging through her things just for his own… "pleasure" without thinking about other peoples feelings except himself. i would like to say he expects people to change how they act just to satisfy him and his entertainment.

it is not clear whether or not it was brahms himself or his parents that decided that brahms should start living in the walls. so i can't really point toward child neglect and or child abuse since it's not clear if it was his parents or himself. but of course, living in the walls and not socializing with anyone besides the parents he controls will take a toll on his social cues and how he behaves and thinks.

he made other people do everything else for him, including cleaning up the “mess” that he made. the one time we were shown something “nice” that he did was with greta; when greta was scared of brahms, he decided to make her favorite sandwich himself which is PB&J and gave it to her to reassure her that he won’t hurt her and he just wants greta to follow the fucking rules and schedule.

he grew up to become a very manipulative and violent but intelligent man from what we can see by how he manipulated greta in the movie by using his voice, actions, and intimidation to try and get what he wants. until he realized when greta successfully got out of the house, he couldn’t do anything about it, even if he tried to do damage control when he realized he was just scaring her away instead of her being obedient to his demands on wanting her to stay in the manor. this gives me the impression that he does have abandonment issues, attachment issues, and is very scared to be left alone.

if he were to actually been put in therapy or gotten any professional help when he was a kid, and it was effective, i do believe all of this wouldn’t happen to him. or if he were to get professional help when he was already a grown man and already did the things he did i feel like it would take a lot of time to help him but if it’s consistent with baby steps, it would help him to improve.

so just keep in mind he is very much a sad character but also a bad person that needs to get help. but i still love him and his character very much… i think you can tell just by me writing all of this because of my hyperfixation on him.

out of topic he reminds me a lot of the song “meant to be yours” and that is HIS song and not any other slashers!!! fight me!!! and i hc him to have dysthymia cause i’m self projecting and he also doesn’t really believe in the christian/catholic god even if his parents prayed in that one scene with the doll brahms

#brahms heelshire #brahms the boy #the boy 2016 #brahms heelsire x reader

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furiousgoldfish · 7 months

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Do you have any advice for how to manage stress and like constant fear? Or maybe advice about what I should do? (Tw suicide, not mine) My younger sister is severely suicidal and depressed and I've been talking to her every night and sleeping on her floor to stop her from killing herself and I keep talking to my parents about how she needs to go to therapy but they aren't doing anything and they haven't for over a year. My mom told me that it's not my place to decide what's best for my sister. And my dad said that because I'm only 17 I don't know anything about this but I've begged them like five or six times and they still don't believe me. My mom insists I'm being over dramatic and it's my fault that her and my dad talking to my younger sister like 1 time didn't make it better. But they won't talk to my sister at all if I don't or help her and my younger sister has tried to attempt before so I think we need to talk to her more than once? I guess It seems pretty clear to me that my younger sister should go to therapy but maybe I'm thinking about this wrong? Idk. Um. So I guess I just feel really overwhelmed because I've tried asking my siblings for help about my sister and one of my sister's said they wish my younger sister had never been born so we wouldn't have to deal with this (which made it pretty clear she doesn't want to help. Also she's done exactly 0 things to help she just gets inconvenienced by the very idea she might have to and things won't revolve around her problems for like 2 seconds) and my oldest sister who's married and moved out I talked with but now she wont do anything anymore because my parents told her to back off after my mom went on a huge spiel about how I'm over dramatic and blowing things out of porportion and my oldest sister has no right to do anything because she doesn't have legal custody. I don't know. My entire family talks to me about their stress and worries and concerns and I shouldn't be so upset about my younger sister cause I'm used to it but I'm scared all the time that the moment I fall asleep she's actually going to hurt herself so I try to stay up all night to listen for her and I just don't know how to manage the stress and get her help. My parents homeschool us and I don't get to leave the house by myself cause my mom is convinced I'll get murdered. So idk who to talk to or how or even if I should. I don't think this is really abuse, cause my parents haven't hit us and I don't really fit the criteria for emotional abuse either according to your masterlist, (I mean my sister has hit me a few times (not the one moved out) but siblings are different) but idk. It's still trauma? Maybe. Unless it's not? I don't know. Maybe my mom is right. Sorry if this is rambly and weird im just really tired.

Hey, from what I'm reading here, you're the entire's family emotional support, you take all of the stress and complaints from everyone, you alone are responsible for your sister's continuation of life, and you are not even allowed to leave the house, because your mom is worried you'll get killed? And you got hit, but you don't think that was serious?

There is so much stress on you, I'm worried that you might get pushed under the edge. I can sense your utter desperation in saving your sister's life, and that comes from a place of deep compassion, concern, and kinship with your family member. I can tell you'd do anything to save her, and you fear that if she dies, it will be your fault.

But it can't be. Because you alone cannot be responsible for what others do. You've already done everything. You've asked every other person for help, you've raised the alarm, you've been trying to help her, you can't even sleep at night. It cannot be expected of you to go to these lengths, be in this amount of stress, for prolonged amounts of time, even when someone's life is in question. You are not a suicide line, you're not an institution that provides support and watch over people who might do something to themselves, you're not in control.

I believe you're under too much stress and that nobody has any compassion for what you're going through. If even one person cared, they would have helped your sister and watched over her for you. They would have shared the responsibility of saving her and wouldn't make you the sole person responsible. If your sister does, in the worst case scenario, die, you will be the only one who isn't responsible, who's already done everything to prevent it. The fault will be on everyone else.

You seem to be in a prolonged crisis, and I'm not actually equipped to help someone in a crisis like this, so I can't tell you what to do - or rather, I think you've done enough. You've been through enough stress, enough apathy, enough pain. You've been left alone to suffer through this stress, even though you've expressed how scared and anxious you are, and asked for help.

You being kept inside the house at all times, is a form of physical abuse, I should have added it to the checklists - it's a form of violence to restrict your movements. It doesn't make any sense that you will be killed if you step out, when everyone else can walk freely. You are being parentified, and used as an emotional resource, instead of cared for and raised as a loved and nurtured child.

This list has a category of 'parentification', I hope you can find some resources there. I believe you are being abused, and you were taught that it doesn't matter if it happens to you.

I hope you manage to get some sleep. I'm so sorry you were put into this situation, you are not responsible for this. Your parents should be taking this stress, not you. You cannot be responsible for anyone's continuation of life, and being put in a situation where it's expected of you, will break you. This is not on you.

#tw suicide #tw being responsible for preventing suicide #tw child used as a suicide prevention measure #parentification #abuse #psychological abuse #apathy #exploitation #fear mongering #preventing children from leaving the house by fear mongering #upsetting #child abuse #abusive parents #abusive family #abusive siblings

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lookbluesoup · 1 year

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My Take on Fourchenault (complicated)

Making this my own (very long) post and want to say right out the gate that even though seeing several other posts about him inspired me to write my own thoughts out, I'm not here to tell anyone else they're wrong! This is fandom! You're valid! While I don't expect a lot of people to read this and mostly just need to get it out of my head, if I get a bunch of notes on this bashing other fans or parroting hate for specific characters, I will turn reblogs off, and will block people if they try to make this into Drama. Whether you like Levidad or not, be nice.

I also think characters and their actions can mean different things to different people, that's partly the beauty of fiction. Especially in FFXIV, there's a big cinematic element. There's a lot of characters, and background information, that is either left vague or only implied, because they're not relevant to the Main Plot. There's also a lot of subtlety to the FF story, a lot of showing rather than telling, and a lot of different people writing the dialogue, translating it, and building off it. And that leaves gaps that every player will have to fill in for themselves, based on their own reference points. What stands out to one player might be insignificant to another. We are all playing a different game, at the end of the day. I'm not here to tell you, reader, or Fandom at large, what to think. I'm just invested enough in this character to want to share my own thoughts about him!

Overall:

I think he's complicated. I believe he loves his children a helluva lot, but I also think he abusive (partly out of ignorance.) I don't think he's a villain, but I do think he makes some very harmful mistakes and that some of his behavior is very selfish. Which makes him interesting. And I'm very curious what role he'll play as MSQ continues in years to come, what else we might learn about him.

Because this is SO LONG I'm putting my expanded thoughts under a cut!

On Needing Control / Criteria for Abuse

So mostly what I'm going to talk about to start is... warning signs. I'll acknowledge my own bias here in that I'm a psych student who's had to do lots of research, research papers, reviewed case studies, etc. with a particular focus in trauma and abuse. I've spent years IN therapy, coming out of an emotionally abusive home as a neurodivergent and physically disabled person with several (clinically diagnosed) narcissists in my family, and yeah, the issue of parents who are... Overly controlling. Stubborn. Self-certain. And applauded by the outside community, seen as Respectable people in their insular social groups... Hits close to home. So what Fourchenault means to me is absolutely influenced by this background.

A parent can be affectionate a lot of the time, can love their children, be very devoted to family, and still absolutely be abusive. Especially in emotional areas. And, also important - the abusers usually do not see themselves as abusers. They are Protectors. Lovers. Family. Leaders. Victims. Heroes in their narrative. They can believe this so much and so loudly that they convince the people they are abusing, too.

Additionally, doing abusive things does NOT automatically make someone irredeemable, evil, or a villain. It is a flaw, a behavior that can be unlearned, and can be performed out of ignorance and without deliberately trying to hurt someone. I do not think Levidad (Look don't ask me to write out Fourchenault every time this is a long enough essay already) is trying to hurt his family, or that he wants to. And I do think he recognizes some of his mistakes by Endwalker's finale and is on a path to improvement.

But in emotionally abusive homes, you often see dynamics at play where affection becomes a tool for control. Children are given moments of unfailing devotion and love and care as long as they do what's expected of them, but when they misbehave (according to that parent) the affection is withdrawn, or threats are made, even or especially threats the parent doesn't mean, because it's really only about having the child obey. I've seen and experienced this in real life, where parents would threaten to kick their kids out for even minor infractions, just as a scare tactic to keep control, despite having no intention of actually kicking the kid out.

And fear? Is an HUGE motivator for this kind of abuse. Parents can do absolutely wicked things to their children because of a 'greater good' mentality, because they're trying to prevent what they see as greater harm.

People who need control, who are stubborn, who have a temper, might be prone to these tactics. All things Levidad is shown to possess in spades. (I'll expand on some of this further below)

And this dynamic often teaches kids and spouses to desire the affection they know is there, and want, while also being afraid to lose that affection by displeasing their loved one. It may sometimes cause them to become argumentative and self-righteous in their own way (cough, ARR Alphinaud, cough). It can make them belligerent, or insecure and uncertain of themselves, or their worthiness to be loved (Alisaie.) It teaches them to keep secrets, and go behind a loved one's back (Ameliance.)

Some other important aspects of this kind of dysfunctional dynamic is that... the people being abused can be very protective of their abuser. Make excuses. Focus on the good things and minimize the bad. They want to have that relationship, they do genuinely care about the person mistreating them. That doesn't make them incompetent, nor is it meant to infantilize them. It's just a thing that happens to people because of how our brains work and how much most people are wired to need other people and have loyal social bonds. It's a trait to be aware of. It means that just because Fourchenault's family is permissive of his vices, doesn't mean they aren't vices.

AND, to add even more nuance to that, abuse isn't a 24/7 thing. It can be inconsistent. It can vary with the state of mind people are in, other experiences they had that day, and so on. Just because there are a few good days or good choices does not negate all the other bad ones.

A few things that have been stated in canon, which are worth considering to me

He does not read the letters the twins send home, only Ameliance does. While this could mean a lot of things, it can't be argued that he has little to no idea of what is actually going on in his children's lives despite having the opportunity to find out (Ameliance specifically says how she's seen them grow up through their letters!) But in his mind they're still inexperienced children, and he chooses to keep it that way.

Ameliance has been financing the twins and Scions behind Levidad's back. There is no reason to keep this activity a secret from him in a healthy relationship with good boundaries. That could speak poorly of Ameliance instead of Fourchenault, but it's hard to argue for a case where he would have been supportive of her spending. Given his opinions on staying out of other city-state's affairs, and given her behavior compared to his in-game, I'd argue this was more her trying to avoid his ire. Especially because:

I personally find it impossible to justify taking this out on the servants. Are the servants expected to treat his wife as subservient to him rather than an equal, and bar her guests entry? Is he unable to discuss or plan with his wife and trust her (implying a lot of disfunction in the home?) Is taking it out on the servants a roundabout way to punish her? And/or is he going to punish an "acceptable target", the servants, rather than express his anger at his wife or at you, who actually did the thing he's upset about? The servants? Really? People who can't rightly argue back or defend themselves because he is their employer and they are servants? This kind of abuse of power is not the behavior of a benevolent, well-adjusted man. Honestly, for me this line of dialogue alone is a massive warning sign that Fourchenault's need for control can manifest in extremely harmful ways. I'll avoid speculating on just how much that could affect with his family but in this line of dialogue alone there is a lot to unpack.

Alphinaud liked to argue with his dad. Their rows would cause scenes in the house. Alphy is a little shit before Heavensward but assuming he doesn't have some kind of Oppositional Defiant Disorder or Narcissism (he doesn't), I suspect that behavior most likely comes from emotional neglect or abuse. Either seeking attention even if it's negative, or modelling after his dad in argumentative/self-assured approach for approval, or attempting to claim some kind of independence because his home life has been so controlling.

Levidad claims he will do anything to protect his kids, and that he would have forced them onto the Ark even against their will, even if they hated him for it. While that could be read in a touching way, for me it was just another sign that he would do anything to have control. Because to protect his children, he needs to be able to control them. He can love them and use that love to justify infantilizing his children and trying to take their agency away.

While Levidad does let the kids leave Sharlayan (though as they are considered adults, I'm not convinced he actually could have stopped them), it could have been under the assumption they'd come running back soon enough. Since he doesn't read their letters, he may be entirely oblivious to the actual amount of danger they found themselves in. He let them spend time with their grandad, which is good, too. I don't think Levidad demanded total 100% uniformity of belief from his kids, it wouldn't fit with their culture. But at the end of the day I think he still wanted to be assured he was in control.

As far as disowning them. Yeah, I think it was a control tactic, too. I think the only thing he new how to do was Escalate in his disagreement with them, because that's what he did when they were children and they fought. I think the significant moment when Levidad slams them with that excommunication is the fact that Alphinaud does not argue with him. He lets his dad go. And even tells Alisaie not to try, either. Alphinaud has grown. He doesn't need to prove himself to his father anymore, not really. And that means Levidad can't control Alphy anymore, either.

I think if their dad had disowned them as a way to get them a message and pique their curiosity, he would have explained so when the vow of silence was lifted, and apologized for that, explicitly. I don't think he would have been so opposed in the Forum to having the Scions help with the Ark and get involved, because at that point, why continue fostering ill will with the children you love, or potentially risking turning the forum against them?

I could see him being so callous to misdirect the Eorzean Alliance because he does not trust them or want their interference as the Ark will only be able to carry so many people, he doesn't need an army beating down Sharlayan's door, and is baffled/frustrated by his children's opposition in front of everyone, because again, he doesn't know how much they've changed and matured. But disowning them was still about control, in my mind.

Lost in Translation?

It's entirely conceivable to me that Japanese Levidad could be very different from English Levidad. The cultural expectations around behavior, good or bad, are different. And we know, from stuff like how differently Haurchefant's lines were in English vs Japanese at first, that sometimes stuff does change in translation to make it carry better for different audiences. Or because the translator interprets something a specific way. English and Japanese are really different languages and how ideas are communicated or assumptions are made are different, too. Let's also not forget Nael van Darnus's whoopsie gender swap. So if there's parts of Levidad's behavior that seem inconsistent, it could, quite literally, be lost in translation.

I think this makes who he is and why he does things very open for interpretation, so I will reiterate that everyone is free to read him however you like. Your story is yours, and mine in mine, and that's a good thing!

Not a Villain.

Levidad loves his kids. He acknowledges that they've grown in the finale. He relinquishes some of his control. If he hadn't, his kids would have been able to move on without his support. I think he has the capacity to learn to treat them better and that ultimately his love for his kids and desire to have a relationship with them will win out over his need to have control, and I am very curious to see where the story takes them all.

#wyn gabs #endwalker spoilers #long post #warning tags since I do mention aspects of these:#trauma #emotional abuse #narcissistic abuse #(do not think fourchenault is a narcissist I just mention narcissim)#text #shower thoughts

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seidenbros · 2 years

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Hello! Would you be able to do an Eddie x y/n 1 where y/n has a CPTSD flashback and panic attack by being triggered by someone shouting/sudden loud noise and Eddie realises whats happened and has to try to bring y/n back to the present by voice/gentle touches as well as slow gradual movements so that he doesn't scare y/n more then they already are?

Requests are open | prompt lists for inspiration | Stranger Things Masterlist

Hello there 💚Thank you so much for your request! It's not an easy topic, so I really hope I did it justice, because it is something I don't have personal experience with (and I know how lucky I am!), so I really hope I portrayed it well. Pairing: Eddie Munson x gn!Reader (let me know if I missed something) Word count: 2620 Warning/Tags: angst with happy ending, hurt/comfort, cptsd, childhood trauma, child abuse, panic attack (let me know if I missed anything)

Falling to Pieces

About a year ago, you’d moved to Hawkins, moved on with your aunt, because you couldn’t live with your parents anymore. It had taken years for someone to realise what was going on in your home, because you’d always hidden it well, had always been the quiet kid, the outcast, so nobody had gotten close to you. The whole facade had crumbled down when your aunt had come for a surprise visit and had seen the injuries on your body. Once she’d cracked your shell, you’d started to tell her everything, about what had been going on ever since you’d been what? Eight? Nine? Ever since they’d been sure that you understood that you couldn’t tell anyone or you would end up in the streets, because nobody would want to take care of you. Your aunt would have done that, would have taken you in a heartbeat if she’d known, and she’d cursed herself for not realising this sooner.

By now, you were just happy that it was over, that you were living with someone who genuinely cared about you, who was taking care that you got the help that you needed and had set you up with a therapist. It had taken some time for you to open up, but by now, you were quite happy with the arrangement, worked on what you were talking about, and you were honest, which was the most important thing.

Therapy was actually where you’d met Eddie a few months ago. Yes, you’d seen him around, and he’d certainly caught your eye, but you’d never really talked until that day a couple of months ago, when you’d nearly bumped into him, while exiting the building.

“Sorry my lady,” he’d apologised immediately, bowing to you with a grin that had made your knees weak. When he’d straightened again, he’d scrunched up his nose for a moment. “You're Gloria’s niece, right? Can you give me just a minute? Then we can go.”

He’d caught you completely off guard with that, so you’d waited in front of the building for him, even though you hadn’t had any idea why. Five minutes later, Eddie had been with you again, telling you that your aunt had asked him to pick you up, because she’d been stuck at work.

From that day on, you’d spent more and more time together, and you’d even told Eddie a little bit about your therapy sessions. Sure, he’d guessed where you’d been that day, where you went every tuesday afternoon, but he’d never asked until you’d told him. It had become a weekly routine that he picked you up, asking you how therapy had gone after you’d confided in him. You’d become friends over time, and Eddie knew a little bit about your past, about your aunt taking you in because you hadn’t been safe in your parents’ presence anymore. He didn’t know exactly what had happened, how long you’d lived in these conditions, but he’d definitely picked up on your behaviour when you heard certain sounds, when it suddenly got too loud around you.

Eddie constantly made sure that you were okay, when you spent time together. His eyes lingered on you a little longer than was probably appropriate, he was careful with touching you every time, and always made sure you were okay with where you were going. The cinema? During the week, when there were less people there. Most of the time you stayed at your aunt’s house or at his trailer. You loved it when he played some music for you, but he always made sure to not turn the amp up too much. Eddie was very observant when it came to you, because he liked you. More than he’d probably like to admit, but he did.

That was why he wanted to do something special for you, take you somewhere nice where you could hopefully forget everything for a while and just forget about all your troubles. So, he picked you up after your therapy session like he usually did, but didn’t go towards your aunt’s home, no, he went in the other direction.

“This is not the way to my home,” you said, voice a little shaky, because you didn’t know what was happening.

“No, I thought I could take you somewhere nice, where you can relax and free your mind a little hopefully.” Eddie cast a glance at you, before he looked back out on the street, slowing down a little bit. “Only if that’s okay with you of course! Shit, I should have asked you first, I’m sorry.”

“No, no, no, don’t apologise!” You didn’t want him to feel guilty, because you were always a little… careful. Eddie had always made you feel safe, constantly checking up on you, so you knew that he wouldn’t do anything to hurt you or make you feel uncomfortable on purpose. “It’s… a nice thought. Really!”

“Are you sure? Because I can turn the car around!” “Yes I’m sure. Actually kind of curious where you’re taking me.”

“Ahh well…” Eddie scratched the back of his neck, and was he blushing? “It’s nothing that special. Just the house of a… friend. I’m looking out for it while he’s indisposed.” A nice way of saying that Rick was in jail at the moment, but that didn’t really matter right now. “It’s at Lover’s Lake, so I thought we could take the boat and just get on the lake, enjoy the silence out there for a moment.” And when you had enough of that silence, you could go in the house and watch a movie or something. Eddie really wanted to spend more time alone with you, and nobody really came here, so it was the perfect place for some peace and quiet. Of course, Lover’s Lake was highly frequented during the summer months, but not this side of the lake.

“That sounds nice.” You smiled to yourself, because it was such a sweet gesture. Eddie had really thought about what you might enjoy and so he’d ended up with you at Rick’s house.

Relief washed over Eddie, because he’d thought that he’d overstepped your boundaries. There was a lot that you’d talked about, but still more that you hadn’t talked about, so he wasn’t sure if you’d enjoy this little trip. He loved seeing you smile, and so when you showed that smile right now, his stomach flipped, happiness spreading through his whole body.

Once you got there, Eddie parked the van and came around to open the door for you. He held out his hand for you to take and you happily did. You’d done that before, had walked hand in hand, once or twice, and every time you allowed him to hold your hand, Eddie was overjoyed. Because it was a sign of trust, something that meant a lot to him. That you decided to do this with him today was another way of showing him that you were beginning to trust him. There was still a long way to go, due to your past, and he knew that, so he was happy with everything you were willing to give him.

“If at any point, you feel uncomfortable, you’ll let me know, right? We can leave any time.” He had to make sure that you knew that, that you didn’t feel like going through with this to do him a favour or anything.

“Alright. I’ll keep that in mind.” With a smile on your lips, you squeezed his hand, held on to it as he led you to the boathouse to the side of the house. You’d never been here before, it was your first trip to Lover’s Lake, but it looked quite nice.

Eddie had to let go of your hand to take care of the boat, take everything that you wouldn’t need out of it and then lower the boat to the water. It went well until you heard loud noises from outside, something crash, people shouting.

“Jesuc Christ, who is-” Eddie started, turning around to look outside, because usually nobody came here, but his eyes landed on you and he let go of the boat immediately.

Instinctively, you’d crouched down, covering your face with your hands, shrinking as far back against the wall as was humanly possible. Your heart was hammering in your chest, palms sweating profusely as you tried to hide your body so that you would stay unharmed. Your whole body was trembling, breathing bacem more and more difficult for you, because you felt like someone was pressing down on your chest.

This wasn’t happening, you were safe, your parents were nowhere to be found, miles and miles away. You told yourself that, tried to calm yourself down, but to no avail. When another crashing noise could be heard outside, you whimpered, screwing your eyes shut. You felt like you were back in your childhood home, your parents arguing in front of your door until you mother left and your father came into your room to have his way with you. You could nearly feel his hands on your body, making you sick to your stomach. You’d escaped all of this, you knew that deep down, but right now, it felt all too real

“Y/n…” Eddie said softly, walking over to you, but you shrank back even more, keeping your eyes closed to keep some kind of control.

Eddie wasn’t sure what to do, how to approach you, because he couldn’t just let you stay down there in this state alone, but he also didn’t want to scare you even more. You’d talked about your past, had let him in on a few details, and when he’d seen some of your scars, you’d told him briefly how you’d gotten them. He knew that your parents were responsible for everything, but there were still a lot of things he didn’t know, that you weren’t able to tell him. Your therapist knew, but she was the only one. Not even your aunt knew the full extent of the damage your parents had done.

Eddie cast a quick look out of the window, but the people who’d come here, probably to see if Rick was home or not, were just leaving. His eyes were on you again immediately, and he slowly got down on his knees, still keeping his distance, because he didn’t want you to move even further away.

“They’re gone… It’s all quiet again,” Eddie informed you, eyes never leaving your frame. He watched every little reaction. “Nobody’s gonna harm you here, alright? Not when I’m here. LIsten to me, okay and keep breathing. Deep breaths, in through your nose, out through your mouth, can you do that for me?”

He thought he saw the tiniest of nods from you, so he took a deep breath himself.

“I’m here, okay? I’ll slay all the dragons that might come your way, or give them something to hoard if they are nice and don’t want to eat you. I’ll walk all the way to Mordor with you so we can throw your worries into Mount Doom and get rid of them.”

While listening to Eddie, you followed what he’d told you, taking deep breaths. It was easier when he was talking to you, because his words made you visualise what he was telling you. It even made you smile a little bit, and you slowly felt the tension ease out of your body. When you opened up your eyes again to look at him, you even took one hand away from your eyes. Eddie seized that moment to reach out his own hand. Only his fingertips were brushing against your hand. You tensed for a second again, before you relaxed and placed your hand in his.

“Or if you prefer, I can bring you to the Shire and make sure that you get all the meals you need. Breakfast, second breakfast, elevenses… And I’ll definitely protect you from all the orcs that might cross your path.”

Your breathing became steadier, no more pressure on your chest, and you felt yourself calm down more and more. Your hands were still trembling a little bit, but that was the aftershock of your own panic attack. You were still listening for any loud sounds, waiting for someone to barge through that door and come at you, but Eddie managed to draw your focus towards him.

“Just think that Gandalf should keep his fireworks to himself this time, right?” Eddie looked into your eyes, slowly pulling you up with him. When he saw your nod, his smile softened. He let go of your hand, slowly ran his fingertips up your arm. “But I think a little lesson in fighting might not be so bad, huh? So you can learn to slay your own dragons and defend yourself from the orcs in this world.”

“Probably,” you eventually managed to say out loud, and once you were sure that there was nobody coming in here, you relaxed a little more. Without thinking too long about it, you stepped up to Eddie, wrapping your arms around his middle. His familiar scent filled your nose, grounding you even more. You pressed your nose against his chest and closed your eyes.

Eddie took a deep breath before he wrapped his arms around you as well - not too tight, though, because he didn’t want you to feel caged in his embrace.

“I mean it, okay?” he said a lot more quietly now, before he leaned down to brush his lips across your forehead. “I’ll protect you no matter what. You’re safe with me.”

Eddie’s hands moved slowly over your back, up and down in a soothing motion until he felt you melt into him. Now, it was his heart that was picking up its pace, because of you, because you were in his arms, and he’d been thinking about this for so long now, but he’d never made a move. He wouldn’t do that now, he was just glad that he’d been able to help you in this situation. And maybe… maybe you’d trust him enough one day to let him take you out on a proper date.

“We can leave if you want to, if you need some rest. I can take you home.” Eddie offered, smoothing a hand over your hair, before he pulled back slightly to look at you.

“I… don’t know.” You raised your head, scrunched your nose up in thought. “No, I want to try this. It sounded so nice.”

“Alright, but remember-”

“I’ll let you know when I want to go,” you said with a smile, but then you pulled him towards you to kiss his cheek. “And then you, Eddie… You were wonderful just now.”

“Ahh, I just did what I thought might work, because I wasn’t sure.”

“It worked perfectly. And I love what you said.” You’d talked about books a lot, and you knew how passionate he was about The Lord of the Rings, so it was probably only natural that he’d used it as a reference, but it had worked so well for you at the moment. “So, you’ll take me out to elevenses some time?”

“If you want that, sure!” He couldn’t deny the fact that his heart skipped a beat at your words, and the bright smile on his lips made you grin to yourself.

“I’d love that.”

“Great…Awesome!” Now it was Eddie who leaned towards you to press a kiss to your cheek, before he quickly turned towards the boat again to get that ready for you. It hadn’t been your first panic attack, but the first one that had been over so quickly because of Eddie. With him by your side, you really knew that you were safe.

Tag-list: @violetpenguinkris @tellhound @ghosttownwherenoonegoes @spideyanakin-interacts @bellamy-barnes @beepisbeep @snapefiction @hardysbitch @give-em-hellfire @sadbitchfangirl @ravenclawkimmi @lacrymosa-24 @ruinedbythehobbit @samlealea

Let me know (send me a message) if you want to be on one of my tag-lists. I have one for the Promises Series, Eddie x Reader, Steddie and Steve x Reader 💚

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x gn!reader #eddie x reader #eddie x you #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson angst #stranger things x reader #stranger things x you #stranger things imagine #staffi writes

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toournextadventure · 1 year

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I saw an ask where it said that Wednesday is the least traumatized and, if you think about it, it kinda does makes sense in a fucked up way. Even from a canon prospective, the list is simple.

Enid-Mother is a bitch who is never satisfied with anything she does. Father is a doormat despite saying he loves Enid(Parents who don’t stand up for their children are just as bad as the abusive ones, try an change my mind)

Xavier-Has all the issues that can come with dealing with a famous father who is also somehow absent at the same time. Plus, he’s accused of multiple murders and chained up like a monster.

Yoko- she’s a vampire, which means we automatically assume she’s old as shit. And that means she’s seen some shit. Enough said about that.

Ajax- There is probably some reason why he constantly stays high.

Bianca- Manipulative ass mother and an underlying reason as to why she changed her name. In that one episode, her mother started calling her ‘Brandy’ before Bianca interrupted her. So there’s something with that. On top of the stereotypes that come with being a siren.

Kent and Divina- The stereotypes of being a siren. There probably a lot of past issues with that for the whole siren group.

Eugene- Seeming to have no friends in the first episode we see him, which means there is probably past bullying. Then him being attacked by the Hyde along with his healing process.

Wednesday- Honestly had a good, but severely unconventional upbringing. Her biggest trauma is either putting trust in Tyler and gaining feelings for him, being the catalyst for Crackstone coming back, or not being with Eugene when he was attacked.

Like yeah, being stabbed and having to fight Crackstone was traumatic for literally the whole school but the other three things force Wednesday to deal with emotions that she’s tried to suppress. She’s used to sword fighting with her father and mother, she’s used to getting stab injuries from her childhood. But she’s not used to dealing with the feelings of guilt or anything romantic. The only people she had trusted before Nevermore were her family (and two other people depending on if you consider all of the Addams family movies part of the Wednesday canon. If you know then you know.) She felt a sliver of guilt during the aftermath of her fight with Enid.

And the reason I don’t mention the stabbing of Thing is because she does consider him family, even if she never consciously acknowledged it until then.

So like it’s been said, it makes sense for Wednesday to being the least traumatized.

Now if you take all that and apply it to the ‘Everyone but her AU’ then it definitely makes sense considering how much trauma Birb has.

Sorry for the rant lol. I have hyperfixation issues and lots of thoughts once I get going about certain topics cause if my ‘Tisim as my cousins/brother lovingly joke about it. I mostly blame my ADHD and my ‘tisim.

Listen, don't apologize for your hyperfixations and stiff, I ALSO have the Tism and ADHD, you're in good hands here 😌

But no, you're right. Like, everyone has fairly clear issues. At least from what we've seen (we don't necessarily have proof about Ajax, Kent, and Divina), Eugene and Wednesday are the only ones who have clearly loving parents. Wednesday has her family, of course, and Eugene has his moms. But even Eugene was bullied, I mean, poor kid doesn't have friends except for Wednesday and then eventually Enid. So all these kids legit have some form of trauma

And I'm this AU? It's a disaster, all these kids need therapy EXCEPT surprisingly Wednesday, the ONE KID who's already going to therapy. THIS is why these little disasters are so ride-or-die for each other, their families won't protect them so THEY will 😤

#birb answers

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moonlit-positivity · 2 months

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The thing about mental health & healing that no one ever really acknowledges, is that you can have all these coping skills thrown at you. You can have all these resources listed out. Warm line and hotline numbers out the ass for who to call when you're feeling suicidal.

But there's never ever ever gonna be a way to provide you with the comfort and support of eradicating what has already happened to you in the past.

Like the concept of "give me a fucking time machine so I can go back and prevent it from happening and/or do it better this time."

It doesn't really matter how much you shove breathing techniques into someone's face. If there is never any acknowledgement of the fact that your past exists? That your inability to breathe right now is actually valid? Or have the time and space to even acknowledge that you're suffocating to begin with? To even know that it's okay to be angry and upset and to not cope very well at all? To know that this isn't your fault? Because someone else has robbed you of your entire life?

Then what is the point?

There is an awareness that needs to happen before the true deeper understanding begins, and that awareness is that what you went through wasn't your fault. It wasn't actually supposed to happen like that. You weren't actually supposed to go through that at all. The adults and the people around you should have given you better than what you got.

But if you never get that type of awareness? If you're still being abused and manipulated and surrounded by people who don't care to even ask what you're going through? The what the fuck is breathing gonna do in this scenario. What the fuck is the point of the coping skills and the resources if there is no personal acknowledgement from yourself and others you're trusting that there is even a need to use them to begin with?

You cannot do this type of damage to yourself. You do not do this type of damage for no reason. People will expect you to automatically know that & get with the program right away. But it's like, no, that's not even REMOTELY close to how this works.

You need your humanity restored before you can even begin to trust that youre standing on a solid ground. You've been beat & abused & gaslit by so many people in your life, and now the concept that "you need to take care of yourself" is basically like you just belly flopped into a pool of water.

It stings.

And it stings because first of all, if you had known all of this from the start then we wouldn't even be here, would we? If your parents/abusers had never abused you, you would never even need to use the coping skills and deal with this massive amount of trauma to begin with!

But it also stings because then you start to realize, "oh, oh wait a minute. Oh okay, I finally get it now," when you finally start to understand that oh wait, this is actually kinda fucked up and I've been subconsciously acting on my survival instincts because of it. Suddenly you get thrust into understanding the deeper nuances of everything, everywhere, from every corner and direction.

And there's a lot to dissect here.

You've got your own childhood trauma. Your own parents bullshit has built up so far & deep down inside to the very core of your identity constructs and knowing that everything in you breaks with each passing second.

You've got your shitty abusive family system, your asshole siblings shitting all over you, your asshole relatives invading your space to triangulate on behalf of Those Who Cannot Get The Fuck On.

You've got the gaslighting & manipulation & indoctrination to give a flying fuck, because you love these motherfuckers. What the fuck.

Youve got your own shitty coping skills that are born out of survival & primal instincts. God bless you if you have an addiction of some sort.

Youve got no way of even knowing or understanding what the fuck is happening. Therapy? Lets not pretend that not even 60 years ago "mental health" was still being used as a modern day torture device. Oh wait no that's still happening today too!

You've got stigmatized mental health practices demonizing personality disorders that stem directly from traumagenic symptoms, ill informed & abusive therapists who thrive off of using their authority to induce shame and humiliation knowing good and goddamn well that the reason these symptoms exist is because of, yep you guessed it, 🎉childhood trauma🎉

Youve got a huge lack of mental health for minorities, POC, Asians, lgbt+, just to name a few.

You've got so few therapists that offer focalized services for things like religious trauma, cult & ritual abuse, & other very specific types of trauma, because they're so far & few in between.

You've got the huge lack of awareness in society from recognizing what boundaries & abuse even is, so much so that the only readily available resources for people to come across are pop psychology blogs that romanticize empathy and demonize NPD by grouping every single abuser that's ever existed and labelling them as a narcissist.

You've got very little resources that exist outside of therapy in itself and it's such a scrounge to gather up any and all self help you can possibly find if you cannot afford therapy.

And then you've got to deal with your own life staring back at you at the end of the day. You're traumatized, things are happening inside of your brain and body that you have absolutely no fucking idea what the fuck is happening. You've grown up from that scared little child to now a fully repressed adult filled with fear so deep you're clinging onto relationships and people out of fear that they will leave you stranded and abandoned just like your childhood did. All the while now people around you are getting pissed the fuck off because they don't fucking know. They don't fucking know what you've been through or how it feels to be inside your head. And they're expecting you to be a more fully fleshed out & functioning adult than what you can give them.

And it's never fucking pretty! It's arguments, it's obsession, it's control issues & power dynamics, it's unfocused & repressed anger that gets turned into rage, it's projections, it's staying silent and letting the resentments build, it's the inability to speak, the inability to communicate, the inability to talk about the hard & difficult & uncomfortable. it's all these horrific little tidbits of everything all at once.

It's a fucking nightmare trying to regain any sense of anything at all.

You can't really just snap your fingers and fix all of this shit. Even if you wanted to, even if you dig in real hard and learn and absorb all the fucking coping skills out there. The thing no one ever talks about, is how much time is needed to fully sit with and process every last single fucking thing that has ever happened and what is continuing to happen before you can finally figure out how to handle it.

People be so ready to forget that part. Therapists, friends, family, even ourselves. We just wanna rush right through and get to the end fucking result.

Who the fuck is there while you work it out? And what does your process look like right now, right here and now and in this moment? And who or what do you have in your life that can reaffirm your humanity while you sit with the horrors of your past & work it out? And how open and receptive are you to knowing what you went through was abuse and that eventually you're gonna have to leave this concept of going back in time to get a better fucking outcome?

That's probably a good thing to sit with and think about.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Hope this helps

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

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heleizition · 4 months

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DAMN not me being like whos cody and the plot post being like GODS FUCKING CLONE CHILD. tell me everything we love an apocalypse harbinger. also CAIN MY BOI poor baby needs that therapy. also the whole 'and god thought mh well i liked that lets try again'? chefs kiss. I Wish To Know The Past Lives by you categorised as kinda boring THING pls. does cain get a bestie? someone give this man a bigger support and luv system. also vik is a BABY? a former child. A BABY!! also W HA T is that fuckery with jasper tell me absolutely everything please

SHES MY FAVORITE WEIRDO GIRL I LOVE HER SO MUCH SHES HOLY AND BRINGS A RELIGIOUS FLAVOR OF TERROR THAT I. CARE ABOUT <===== guy who was not raised religious at all idk why im so into it

so in the plot post i mentionned there's a memory thing. everyone remembers bits here and there of their past life, and usually demons mostly remembers bad things they did bc thats how u manipulate people into doing more things that are . not good. cody and jasper are the only ones with no memories of past life bc they were created in this realm, and had no past life. she has no idea she's god's soldier, They sent her down there mostly for Their own entertainement and everything she does is her own choice and will, even if god can "feel it" (which is why . they end up sending the whole lil family back on earth . for a chance to be happy. bc they feel cody's happiness.)

for the rest :

past lives ! um ill put lil warnings before. each lives.

Nell & Belly : tw for child abuse, sexual abuse and exploitation, adults not helping like they should lol

Nell and Belly (btw their full names are Nathanel and Anabelle) are born twins, nell just a few minutes before his sister. their mother died at birth which sent their father (an already not . good guy) into deep constant rage and pain . once they grow up a bit . i mean like. 7 or so. theres sexual abuse happening . and beatings. selling out his kids for a night for money. nothing fun. nell and belly get through it together until at like 16 nell (who's like, underfed, short, no muscles) snaps and stabs their dad over and over again .

nell only remembers this, killing his dad, with absolutely no context behind (protecting himself, protecting his sister, freeing them) so he thinks he used to be a Bad person. after that they get placed in the system, ig theres a trial but its ruled as legitime defense, and once they're 18 belly just. vanishes. they both deal very differently with what their whole life was, nell cant go on, can barely support himself, thinks he should have died right then, and belly flees from nell to find . somewhere where she can forget. she regrets it but nell dies before she can reconnect (not sure how, his death isn't rly whats important here,,, im thinking . so numb he can't rly recognize whats around him . walk in front of a car. yeah). belly struggles to have a happy life after that and ... im not sure how she dies yet. im thinking drowning bc its a thing that almost happens in the farm au....

as an angel, she doesnt remember much, because there wasn't much happiness in her life. also these two as twins have a bond that still connect them in angel/demon realm ! so they know the other exist and they remember once they meet !!

eden : tw for transphobia, drugs, suicide, abusive family ?

i'll go short w him bc it's not pleasant and it makes me sad <==== guy who MADE this backstory

eden is trans, always feels out of place as a kid, as a teen. his parents kick him out at eighteen bc they "can" and bc even if eden never said anything, they Know and don't want him in here. he has a friend who helps for a while, until the rumors spread about him being a ~ freak ~ and his friend is like. im sorry my parents cant let u impose in the house. anymore. : /// . eden is lost and desperate and doesn't know what to do, sells himself, gets into drugs to get through the days, finds out the days aren't worht getting through, kills himself. yay

he's one of the few who's always remembered his past fully,,,

LENA lena my BABYGIRL um tw for war mostly

this happens in a fictif medieval era lmao she's the princess of a kingdom, daughter of a kind king and queen, destined to rule, fighting among the army already, everyone loves her, except her small kingdom gets torn apart by another kingdom, not that much bigger, but with much greater military strength. the country gets torn apart before the army, the king and queen can do anything. the enemies arrive to the capital and lena doesn't even ask and joins the vanguard. she uses a sword at this point, get through enemies after enemies, and it looks like there's hope, until one of the enemy's captain reach her. it's a bit of a eowyn versus the nazgul vibe in lotr except lena doesn't win. she's slain, and slowly dies on hte battlefield with her beloved country burning, and the people she swore to protect screaming and dying.

she's very loved. i care her so much. she's my default when idk what to draw :3 she remembers being a loved princess, and slowly remember the last fight. it haunts her, the weight of losing this fight, that she couldn't do more, even if it's from a time long gone.

titania ummmm well theres grooming. witch hunt and betrayal.

i have to research the exact period titania's past happens, but its between late 1400 and early 1600s i think !

she loses her parents very young and thus, is cared for by the local church. there's a priest here who teaches her to use her looks and innocence as a way to get things, information, food, anything. once she's 13/14, he starts showing her the more physical way to do so.

she starts using sex as a way to learn things. she's the person who knows the most about anyone in the village. she's an important figure, one who's gifted things to keep silent, who gives her body in exchange for things to hang up against someone. she hates the priest who made her who she is . she couldn't have been something else, happier, lighter, but she's this, and she's too deep in to just stop.

she's too powerful, she knows too much, and when there's word in the village of a witch inhabiting it, they all turn to her. they have a way to get rid of her and the power she holds over them. she screams what she knows when she's brought to the center of the village, screams her hate of the priest who made her who she is, destroys everyone's nice little life because it cost hers. she dies burning, and everyone chooses to act like they never heard her in her final day.

she's the wise calm one who's actually full of anger and wrath. i love her a lot. there's this french song i love ("a witch like any other") which talks abt . women. women and men treating women like they're granted. and like. its a titania song. if u wanna give it a listen this version is amazing altho it's more powerful if u know french....

VIK UM OKAY not much tw here. it's just fucking sad. im a terrible oc parent. it's also heavily inspired by hell's girl season 3's protagonist past..................... it's basically that tbh SOEJFEFSJS

his mother and him are not allowed in the village. his mother is sick. he doesn't know it, he just follows his mother. she's kind and beautiful, gives him food and tells him stories. he's 4. they can't get in the village and he doesn't know why, so they find dry places in the woods to live. it's fun, it's everything he's ever known. one day his mother doesn't wake up, so he goes to try and find food by himself, to surprise her. when he's back, she's still not awake. she's stiff and cold, so he gives her his blanket and waits. days pass. he's hungry, he's thirsty, he's 5, he doesn't know anything, doesn't know how to go on, the usually places he finds bits of food are empty. it's colder and his mother hasn't moved since that day.

it's snowing. it's pretty. he wishes his mom could wake up and see it but he's starting to think that maybe she won't.

vik dies, age 5, in the forest, cold hungry and alone.

he doesn't remember anything, and his ignorance nd naivety makes him so much easier for noah to manipulate him. she doesn't mean to at first, she sees a child who could use some help, and she's always wanted a child. but they're at war, and sacrifices need to be made.

ABEL AND CAIN'S PAST ISNT CLEAR TO ME RN IM SORRYYYYY SOMETHING ABT ABEL BEIGN A RULER AND CAIN HIS SHADOW WHO KILLS FOR HIM YAGHHHHHH IDK MAN abel slowly remembering that he was a mercyless king who made his people suffer just like hte people he's trying to fight rn,,,,,,,,,,, honey

i don't have much planed for cain in tame of support rn im sowwy.................... i wanna work on it tho.......... i have a lot of secondary charactres that he could fit with...............

noah used to be a cool fearless pirate stealing rich people to give to the poor in her hometown mostly. finding strays and helping them. i love that for her . she was a good guy, a robin hood, and then her devotion to god fucked her up (aka hermit the frog by marina). she jst fights bc she thinks it will bring peace until she learns god was just Bored lol !!!!!!!!!!!!!

i don't think i forgot anyone ? if i did i am sorry (bows down to my kids)

jasper's thing......................... well. there's always been experiments. trying to find a being Higher. jasper was created in a lab. then he and another kid, angel this time, were fused. the scar is most likely due to this . for the longest time jasper just thought he had a strong inner voice but it's this other kid (no name yet sowwy!!!!!!! im coming up with this on the spot actually which is why i like being asked abt them it makes me THINK). he's the only saved experiment from this. abel and cain had been sent to investigate on a demon who's part of the high council, but who some people thought was shady. he indeed was. they destroyed eveything (u don't toy with life) and found jasper. omg . they both kind of raised him . ohhhhhhhhhhhhh OHHHHHHH

anyway later in the story, belly and him are fighting opponent, belly is cool and strong but she almost dies and well . those two are in love and it makes jasper's inner angel wake up along with some new powers. not sure exactly what!!!! im thinking !!!! ok i gotta go grocery show now BE BACK SOON BC I SEE MORE THINGS IN MY INBOX

#ask me #the unwanted #<3 #jasper #cain #nell #belly #abel #cody #titania #lena #noah #think i got everything lol BRB

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