Your worth cannot be measured by someone else's opinion of you 🌸
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i vow to fill my life with:
<3 beautiful music: a blended playlist that warps my brain in the most comforting way.
<3 healthy food: nourishing meals that nurture my body and soothe my soul.
<3 healing thoughts: positive mantras that respect my shortcomings and encourage my growth.
<3 honest people: genuine humans who devote themselves to their passions.
with what do you vow to fill your life?
repeat after me:
"i vow to fill my life with...[insert all that is healthy and good and what YOU love]"
(inspired by the lovely @themimicbird)
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Book: night drives 💖
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One of the healthiest things I've done for myself (as a former 'gifted kid', people pleaser, with loads of trauma)
Is allowing myself to just be a regular boring person.
I've struggled so much with trying to mold myself into who I thought others wanted me to be, and with trying to be perfect that the thought of being "average" and "boring" used to be terrifying to me.
Healing for me looks like letting myself breathe. Letting myself be awkward, clumsy, have bad days without pressuring myself to over preform, and knowing that if I spend my afternoon on a Saturday watching Netflix and eating in bed, that that's okay.
If I am having fun and spending my time how *I* want to?
Then I'm doing something right 💛
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When you forcibly try to wake someone up, this means you're asleep.
When you let them sleep, this means you're awake.
What does this mean?
If you are someone who has awakened and then tries to force everyone around you to wake up, you're "asleep". I know because I was once that person.
What programs are you running in trying to wake people up that are choosing not to wake up? Control issues, panic, dear, anxiety, co-dependency, attachment, worry?
What's showing up for you that needs your stillness, that needs your attention?
If they want to sleep, let them sleep. The more you do you, focus on you, raise your vibrational frequency, the more it will ripple out to everybody and then they will have a choice on whether to get in the journey with you or not.
If not, surrender to that, be okay with it, and if you can't be okay with it, see it as a red flag within and about yourself. See what it brings up in you when someone you love or care about chooses to be asleep.
That is their soul's journey. Honor that, by honoring your journey.
You never know how long your season will be. All we have to decide is what we will do with the time that is given to us.
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Idk who needs to hear this but maybe letting your guard down a little more often and offering others the benefit of the doubt more than you do now could put a larger print in your journey.
Add a little more each day. Small steps
This really applies to everyone no matter what stage you’re at
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You know that tiktok sound you would not hold up well under torture I DID well. No one holds up well under torture. No one walks away from being tortured not completely destroyed. That's the point of torture. So...I think I'm going to stop being ashamed for not holding up well under my torture experience. I was trapped In a bad situation and in the aftermath I reacted to that torture that's nothing to be ashamed about. That's nothing to blame myself for.
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There is no "right" or "wrong" way to react to trauma. There is only survival. You do what you can until you can get out and get safe, and that is the only thing that should ever matter. You deserve to be respected for how you cope with your pain. But you also deserve to be respected enough to know you're worth the effort to heal and seek recovery if you so choose.
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Book: Night Drives 💖
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Often when I’m personally in states of frustration and reactivity where I am not being heard or collaborated with… I get VERY needy. I reach out or want to keep talking especially when I see people or things pulling away.
My attachment takes over - I keep trying to keep it close because I’m scared.
My brain keeps going faster and faster.
I lose the bigger context of what’s happening - and why, even if it is hurting so bad and I’m trying to figure it out, I should even trust the process.
Trust your life path. Trust the process.
I am understanding how this all did have to happen this way.
That rejection is redirection and protection. And I needed to see that and live that.
It doesn’t hurt any less - the grief is there.
But that’s not all that needs to be there.
I needed to learn my lessons, can be grateful for lessons (even the painful ones), and can start LIVING for my values with compassion (especially compassion for yourself!).
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if i think about the hunger games in peeta's perspective i WILL start sobbing
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Sí, sé que mi escritura física es tan analfabeta y no legible como mi manada de escritura.
Escribí esto alrededor de siete meses sobre cuando un ex amante insistió en que debería escribir las cosas. Antes de que supiera lo que era tumblr. Antes de saber lo que era la autoconciencia. No tenía ni idea de qué eran los límites, el amor, el crecimiento, la curación, la comunicación no violenta... etc. la lista continúa y nunca dejaré de aprender y evolucionar en esto. Pero no hace falta decir que el personal que insistió en que escribiera las cosas, ha cambiado mi vida de muchas maneras dramáticamente positivas y hermosas. No sé si creo plenamente en la magia, el destino, los milagros, los ángulos o el fantasma adecuado en el momento adecuado. Pero son algo encantador en esa dirección. Que adoraré y apreciaré para siempre :)
Podría decir que este año fue un hipo un poco más grande para asustarme, pero fue un hipo que me salvó la vida.
Ya sabes. En voz baja, se podría decir que no hubo una ruptura. Solo un descanso. Todavía estamos en esta ruptura de sanación y crecimiento total. Tal vez esta ruptura termine en esta vida o en la siguiente. Solo nuestros corazones lo harán ahora.
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