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esther-dot · 4 months

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I sent the show!Jonsa ask! Yeah, I was toying with it because one of the sticking points for me is figuring out why the show did or didn't do Jonsa and why that may or may not happen in the books. That to me is really some of the most damning stuff, and I can't point to Dany's arc in the show or Stannis' etc. (many of the examples you use) as argumentation for what makes sense in the books but have yet to have happened without, too, including Jonsa.

Anon asks are limited by length (and I would not want to waste your time with adding caveat after caveat lol) but I do also have complicated feelings about D&D; on the one hand I think there were serious problems on set and I have a lot of capital F feminist problems with them, but that doesn't belie all the creative work they put into the show (I do think there are Choices they made about how to portray romance without the source material at hand, and even before that honestly, but I already wrote that ask lol).

You're definitely right about the heaping of romantic parallels; one or two of those relationships alone could be written off, but the Sam/Gilly one is very weird, and Kit's acting choices are... very weird lol. Re: Sansa's jealousy, I had read that more as Dark Sansa foreshadowing as opposed to Jonsa jealousy, so I don't know???? When it comes to show!Jonsa I mostly only like the S6 dynamic anyway, so that might be down to some of my bias.

Basically I'm trying to entertain alternative ideas that might explain things as opposed to genuinely arguing for show!Jonsa being an accident, and I was thinking about this as well because it is an issue I've encountered with shipping/romance/fandom in general before. The male-gazey tropey dynamic ends up feeling off, but by virtue of the romance goggles of the author not being applied to another dynamic, it ends up feeling more mutual and less objectified and more interesting lol. A good example off the top of my head, given you've just watched the MCU films, is that I shipped Steve/Natasha (yes...) because the dynamic in Winter Soldier was above and beyond any other M/F pairing in the films. Naturally everybody goes on about ~platonic soulmates~ but I love good guys with sad/evil/redeemed ladies so I can't help it. Not saying it's at all canon though, I think they absolutely stumbled into that one.

I'm glad your nephew enjoyed the MCU films! I remember when I rewatched Endgame with my best friend, her dad came in and we had to keep explaining who the 'blue one and the green one' were. It made the film much better.

Anyway, thank you so much for entertaining my ask, and as always, being such a good sport. 🥰💝

(continuation of this convo)

You have no idea how much I sympathize with the caveat issue. I write answers and then delete entire paragraphs because I have such a tendency to try to clarify everything that it makes things less clear because I bury the point, but then I regret it when the vague blogs start. We all have limited time though, and every answer can't be thousands of rambling words! Sometimes I've literally just said "insert caveat" lmao!

I do also have complicated feelings about D&D; on the one hand I think there were serious problems on set and I have a lot of capital F feminist problems with them

I read this article about Emilia's experience on set for GoT (I have not been able to relocate it, but I did actually read an article with her quotes--it wasn't just a tumblr post), and I felt that she was taken advantage of when it came to the nudity/sex scenes. I actually think she meant for some of the stories to be amusing, but I felt sick reading it. She didn't say it was D&D, but apparently when she wanted to do less nudity going forward, she was told her fans expected it and it became a fight trying to move away from it, and....I just worry about the power dynamics with all these young actresses and what they're told they "need" to do. The fact that even if they ultimately agree to certain things, it still may be a result of coercion or they aren't actually being taken care of/feel safe when doing it...it left a very bad taste in my mouth regarding the behind the scenes stuff. And obviously, we all noticed the changes they made to the story, what they did to Sansa...plenty of things we can take exception to purely on what made it to our screens.

Basically I'm trying to entertain alternative ideas that might explain things as opposed to genuinely arguing for show!Jonsa being an accident

I enjoy doing that too! Groupthink is boring! I don't expect everyone to think the same way/come to the same conclusion, and I've changed my mind on a few things which only happens if we're willing to entertain different ideas instead of shutting people down. I mean, I'm not easily persuaded to a different way of thinking, but I try to be open to it. With the condition that someone interprets Sansa in a way I can live with which excludes most of the fandom/their theories tbh.

I basically work myself to one position and then back to where I started when it comes to show Jonsa. If it was an accident, I don't love it any less, if it wasn't, I'm curious what the hell happened. I didn't get what I wanted there, so it really doesn't matter to me what people conclude. I genuinely thought it was amusing when Kit acted surprised when he was asked about Jonsa because it was his face that was saying "not normal sibling feelings here." Silly man. 😂 And, D&D fucked up enough I don't like to take them too seriously, so I can't say, "this doesn't make sense therefore it was an accident" because, uh, a lot of their choices ultimately made no sense.

it is an issue I've encountered with shipping/romance/fandom in general before. The male-gazey tropey dynamic ends up feeling off, but by virtue of the romance goggles of the author not being applied to another dynamic, it ends up feeling more mutual and less objectified and more interesting lol.

I certainly agree about the general male v female view of romance. I found that a problem when I said that they didn't write a romance for Jonerys, and the guy I was talking to was like, "they had sex tho???" There was just...a massive gap between what we were looking for when talking about the characters/relationships. Although, he did know what I meant when I said "well, they filmed Jon and Sansa like a ruling couple." He immediately understood that. And, considering what they did to the sandsnakes (I'm not saying the line), I do understand the argument that if they meant for there to be a romance, they would have done it in such a way that we would have objected.

I think part of the reason I believed Jonsa was intentional was because I don't ship non canon pairings. My brain isn't one to think, "oh but what about those two" as I wasn't even involved in fandom before, and I generally just took what a story was and reacted to it, rather than re-configuring it. Obvy, having been in the fandom for so long now, that's changed somewhat, but for me, s7 was a total puzzlement, and Jonsa / some variation of poljon was the only way it connected to everything we had established before. In a bizarre twist, we didn't get the story that would make it coherent, but we still got the endpoint: Jon betraying Dany for Sansa. It's still weird to me, all these years later. Now I'm mainly bemused rather than angry though.

#dot chat

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the--sad--hatter · 3 years

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Steam - Chapter 1 (Loki x Reader)

Warnings - Loki, Smut, Violence & Gore, Swearing, Death, Angst, Dark Humour, Crack Humour, Shenanigan’s, Mutual Pining

Pairing - Loki X Reader (Slow Burn Romance), Enemies to Frenemies to Idiots in Love

Reader Description - Female, No physical descriptions, Only referred to by nicknames & Petnames (No use of Y/N)

Description/Blurb -

“So how’d you get the firepower? What’s your origin story?” Stark asked, peering at you curiously.

“Uh, this is my origin story…” You winced, sighing when he motioned for you to elaborate, “I got these powers about three days ago.”

It’s a tale as old as time, boy meets girl, boy tries to invade girls mind, girl sets boy on fire, boy turns into angry blue boy, they become sworn enemies.

When you suddenly become imbued with a power you have no idea how to control, Nick Fury picks you up and dumps you on The Avengers doorstep, deciding that they are best people to turn you from a wacky novice into a force to be reckoned with.

The power burning inside you has the potential to make you a hero, or destroy you completely, but your new fire based abilities are more than they appear, and in a stroke of spectacularly bad luck, The God of Mischief is the most qualified teacher to mentor you. With Loki guiding you, will you ever learn to control your power? Will you ever make it as an Avenger? Or will you crash and burn?

Only one thing is absolutely certain, when fire and ice collide, things are bound to get… steamy!

Chapter One - Ice Breaker

It was every bit as imposing as you’d imagined it would be, not that you’d ever imagined seeing it under these circumstances.

“Are you coming?” Fury barked at you, breaking you out of your slack-jawed awe.

You snapped your mouth closed and tore your eyes away from the legendary tower, looking at the doors where Fury was impatiently waiting for you.

“Coming!” You squeaked, scurrying over to him, “It’s just when you said you were taking me somewhere where I could safely learn to control my powers, I was sort of picturing an underground bunker in the desert, not the freaking Avengers Tower!”

“I utilise the assets I have, why would I send you away when I have a team of perfectly capable super-powered individuals?” He asked wryly, leading you across the lobby and straight past the security teams who did nothing to stop you both as you made your way into an elevator.

“I’m just saying, a heads up would have been nice.” You muttered petulantly, crossing your arms over your chest and tucking your hands out of sight.

You felt him look at you and studiously refused to meet his eye, staring instead at the numbers above the door as you were carried all the way to the top of the Tower.

“Heads up, you’re meeting The Avengers.” He shot back.

You could say what you liked about the former director of Shield, he was true to his word, because the elevator doors wooshed open to reveal a waiting crowd of Avengers, all of them staring at the man next to you with varying levels of annoyance and/or distrust. You diligently pattered after Fury as he stepped forward to greet them, looking around the room reverently.

The first person you laid eyes on was Tony Stark, Iron Man; the billionaire who had kicked off the modern age of hero’s, and next to him, Captain America, the first of the first, the OG Superhero. Stood behind the Captain was Sam Wilson, the Falcon and a personal favourite of yours, side by side with Bucky Barnes, the former Winter Soldier and poster-child for taking back control of your own fate. Clint Barton aka Hawkeye and the deadliest marksman in the world stood to the side with the Black Widow, deadliest person in the world full stop. In the back of the room two other figures were hanging back, emitting two very different aura’s. Doctor Bruce Banner eyed Fury with trepadition, and well-placed mistrust.

It was the last person in the room that the majority of your attention was reserved for, the tall, imposing god who skulked in the shadows. Contempt and boredom radiated from him, and you couldn’t safely say it was directed purely at Fury. He was also the only one who spared you more than a cursory glance, and you slowed to a stop as you found yourself trapped in his curious gaze. You stared back, trying to reconcile the villain who once tried to subjugate the planet with the one you were locking eyes with. It had been months since he had joined the Avengers, but it never stopped being strange to see him standing with them whenever you watched footage of them taking on whatever bad guy of the week they were battling. However, he had been fully cleared of any wrongdoing in the battle of New York, apparently he had been mind-controlled. As to why he was helping the Avengers, nobody really knew.

Someone cleared their throat loudly and you forced yourself to look away from the stupendously tall god, glancing around the room to see that you now had all eyes watching you expectantly. Apparently you’d zoned out for the introductions.

“’Sup?” You offered, waving in Tony Starks general direction.

“So you’re Fury’s fiery friend, what has that got to do with us?” Stark sighed.

“What, you think he bothered to explain his reasoning to me before dragging my ass up here?” You scoffed.

“She’s here because she has abilities, abilities that she is more likely to learn to handle among similarly gifted people.” Fury explained in a tone that brokered no argument.

Naturally, The Avengers argued.

“We don’t have anybody with fire abilities.” You heard Natasha Romanoff point out, just before you took the opportunity to zone out again.

You were absolutely certain that nobody cared very much what your opinion on the matter was, thankfully. You weren’t sure you had an opinion on the matter. It wasn’t like you had a lot of experience with these kinds of issues, and as far as you were away there wasn’t some superhero academy that you could enrol yourself in. Besides, you were much more interested in re-instating your staring competition with the god of Mischief.

In the brief time you’d been distracted, he’d stepped away from the shadows and moved closer to you, staring at you with his arms crossed.

You resisted the urge to inhale deeply, who knew ex-murderous gods would smell so nice? You looked up, and then up again.

“How tall are you?” You asked incredulously.

His gaze flickered down at you impassively, while you stared back and tried to mentally calculate his height.

“I’m a Frost Giant.” He stated coldly.

“Oh in that case, you’re kinda short.” You scoffed.

You were flooded with immediate remorse but it was drowned out by amusement.

“I beg your pardon?” He demanded, uncrossing his arms and stepping into your personal space.

“Down boy.” Iron Man sniggered, stepping between you. “So how’d you get the firepower? What’s your origin story?” Stark asked, peering at you curiously.

“Uh, this is my origin story…” You winced, sighing when he motioned for you to elaborate, “I got these powers about three days ago.”

“So you’re a baby.” He stated matter-of-factly.

“If I say yes does that mean I can just sit on the floor and cry until someone picks me up and holds me?” You asked, fully willing to give it a go.

It had been three days since your life had literally gone up in flames, three days of pinning your arms at your sides, afraid to close your eyes, afraid to let your guard down for even a split second, afraid to allow yourself to feel even an iota of emotion.

“So how did it happen?” The Captain asked firmly, getting the conversation back on track before you could find out if anyone would volunteer a hug.

“I, well, I kind of…” You trailed off and looked at Fury for help, but he just stared back at you, the bastard.

All eyes were on you as they waited for you to explain, nobody offering any kind of help. You exhaled forcefully and slumped your shoulders, tucking your chin so you didn’t have to look at them anymore.

“I ate a bomb.” You whispered.

There was a very long beat of silence before it was broken by several voices all at once.

“I’m sorry, what?” Stark demanded.

“What did it taste like?” The archer wondered, looking at you almost giddily.

“She didn’t eat a bomb.” Fury finally stepped in to clarify, “She absorbed the blast, after failing to defuse it.”

“Why was a civilian defusing a bomb in the first place?” Captain Rogers asked sharply, glancing at you in concern before turning back to Fury with a hard expression.

“I’m not a civilian, I’m actually an Agent.” You reasoned.

“She’s an Agent-In-Training.” Fury rebutted. “It was her first mission in the field.”

“Baby.” Stark reiterated, faking a cough and smirking at you when you scowled at him.

That was true, and you still didn’t think it was entirely your fault that the bomb had gone off. Yes you’d failed to diffuse it, but you were supposed to be watching the perimeter when you’d stumbled across the explosive device. It had less than thirty seconds on the clock, and you’d stupidly chosen to spend those seconds trying to stop it detonating instead of running away.

“And you put her on bomb duty? Were you trying to get her blown up?” The Black Widow demanded, and you almost laughed until you saw the serious expression on her face.

“There wasn’t supposed to be a bomb there, she was in the wrong place at the wrong time.” Fury shrugged, like it was inconsequential.

To him it probably was.

“She is still in the room, and I was exactly where you told me to be, when you told me to be there. If your intel was bad, that’s on you Mr Superspy.” You snapped.

“Oh I see it now!” Stark briskly announced, “You’re trying to pawn her off on us because she’s too sassy for you.”

“Precisely.” Fury admitted, surprisingly.

“In the words of shortstack over there,” You hissed, gesturing at Loki “I beg your pardon?”

“You don’t have the temperance to be an Agent.” Fury told you blankly, not bothering to soften the blow by at least telling you this in private instead of in front of the world greatest heroes.

“I’d take that as a compliment.” Stark assured you.

“You’re telling me I’m fired? Literally. Because I got blown up, through no fault of my own?” You huffed, clenching your firsts in an effort to keep your emotions from manifesting in a fiery inferno of rage.

“Because you choose to try and handle a bomb you had no training to handle, instead of pursuing the target.” Fury amended, unphased by your distress.

You bit back your retort because you knew it wouldn’t matter to him in the slightest. You couldn’t reason with him, couldn’t explain that you had made the choice not to pursue the target who’d planted the bomb, because you had to try and stop it exploding in a building filled with innocent people. Maybe Fury was right after all. Maybe you weren’t suited to being an Agent, because an Agent would have known that they couldn’t stop the bomb but they could stop the bomber. They would have let a hundred innocent people die and stopped the killer from killing a thousand more the next time. You weren’t an Agent because you’d chosen to die trying to save the hundred, and trusted in Fury and Hill to take down the Bomber.

Of course, that wasn’t what had happened, and in the end nobody had died.

“None of this explains how you ‘ate’ the bomb.” Clint Barton pointed out, and it was a good observation.

“That’s because we don’t have an explanation. She went through the standard medical tests in her training, and all her bloodwork and scans indicated she was fully human. She walked into that building as a human being, and walked back out after absorbing a bomb, as who the hell knows what.”

“So you’ve never done anything like this before?” Dr Banner asked you, speaking directly to you for the first time.

“Not even remotely. I mean my eyes water when I eat chilli.” You shrugged.

“Fascinating.” Banner muttered. “Inhuman?” He asked, turning to Stark.

“Unlikely, she would have probably noticed going through Terragenesis.” Stark responded. “Mutant?” He shot back.

“No, the mutant gene would have shown up in testing.” Dr Banner sighed, looking you over with a scientifically calculating eye. “Can you explain what happened in more detail?”

“Sure, bomb went boom, I went AHHHHHH, and then it was all bright and hot and then the boom went away.” You told them.

“So how do we know that it was you? What if something else contained the blast?” Someone asked, and you looked around before you finally realised it was Sam Wilson who had spoken.

“No, it was… it definitely me.” You sighed.

“How do you know?” Bucky Barnes interjected, backing up the Falcons line of questioning.

That was the million dollar question. How could you be sure that you had anything to do with the bomb, that you had been imbued with fire power?

“During the post-mission de-brief, there was an incident.” You alluded, side-eying Fury and taking a not-so-subtle step away from him.

“Please tell me you tried to set him on fire?” Barton asked giddily, looking between you and your former boss.

When Fury levelled you with a glare and you developed a sudden vested in the ceiling, the Archer sniggered joyfully. You chanced a look around the room and saw that Barton wasn’t the only one exhibiting mirth at the idea of Fury being set ablaze by your.. well, your fury.

“He was yelling at me!” You defended, taking yet another step back when his glare intensified.

“You’re lucky you had no aim and only managed to set fire to the table.” He snapped.

“I think you were the lucky one.” Stark sniggered at Fury.

“Do you want her or not?” Fury sighed.

“Do I get a say in this?” You objected.

“No.” Fury, Stark, Romanoff, and Loki said in unison.

“I can run some tests to figure out what happened to you, if it’s reversible.” Banner offered comfortingly. “With your permission of course.”

“I’m gonna go stand over there with him.” You huffed, making a beeline for the doctor and awkwardly hiding behind him.

“Yeah, we’ll take her, should be an interesting riddle to solve.” Stark shrugged.

Captain Rogers and his buddies glanced at you before appearing to have a silent conversation.

“She can stay here while Stark and Banner figure out what happened, and we can go from there.” The Captain finally decided.

“We’ll take good care of her.” Loki added with a charming smile.

His eyes said something completely different, and you had a sick feeling that you were going to be made to pay for your short jokes.

“Glad I meet your approval; I was worried I was going to fall short.” You sarked, immediately resisting the urge to punch yourself in the face.

“Approval has nothing to do with it. Of all The Avengers, who do you think will be responsible for testing your abilities? You would do well to remember that I am more than mischief and lies, I am the god of chaos and fire.” He warned you cockily, visibly delighting in the way your grin faltered.

You shot a pleading look around the room, but nobody was refuting Loki’s claim. In fact, they were nodding thoughtfully, or in Stark’s case; shrugging apologetically at you. You turned back to Loki, ignoring the deep sense of foreboding in your stomach.

“Well Fe-Fi-Fo-Fuck.”

I have been trying to get back into writing for so long, and this is my last attempt. If this doesn’t work then I am out of ideas.

I know this is a boring start but I have been re-working and rewriting it for days and I can’t improve it. If you enjoyed any part of this, please do tell me! If you didn’t, then tell me that as well. Just give me any feedback at all, I’d appreciate it so so so so so much.

For those of you unaware (especially on AO3), I haven’t been writing for a while because my estranged mother passed away and it brought up issues that needed to be dealt with, but all that is over with now. Thank you to everyone who sent supportive messages and was patient with me ❤

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#Loki #Loki x Reader #The Avengers #Avengers x Reader #Deadpool

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wenellyb · 3 years

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My journey in the MCU fandom on Tumblr: Sharing my thoughts on the Falcon and the Winter Soldier, racism in the MCU fandom and the best and the worse of the fandom

I wasn’t going to write this much but here I am… I don’t even know where I’m going with this but since The Falcon and the Winter Soldier just recently came out, I wanted to share some thoughts.

I joined Tumble because of a show I loved but most of you don’t know it “ Hit the Floor”

I stayed on Tumblr for two reasons only, Anthony Mackie and Sebastian Stan.

Before the Captain America:Civil War premiere, a friend sent me the link to the Sebastian and Anthony ET interview, and I was hooked. In just one interview. I discovered Anthony Mackie. The guy was hilarious!!! I just couldn’t get enough and I knew I had to know more about him. How could he improvise so many funny lines on the spot? He was just amazing.

I had pretty much watched all the avengers movie but that was it. I was not involved in the fandom. So I knew Sam Wilson’s face, but I couldn’t even remember his name if my life depended on it. That’s how much the MCU treated him as a side character.

I was like how the f*ck don’t I know this guy?

His talent reminded me of Eddie Murphy, Jim Carrey or Robin Williams, like yes they can make some emotional or serious movies, but when they want to make you laugh, you will laugh. Whether you want it or not. I kept wondering how this guy wasn’t more famous.

And the banter with Sebastian Stan? Wow, you could tell their friendship was strong, the way Sebastian lighted up when Anthony was talking, and keep bouncing off his jokes. It was art. the way Sebastian said “ I love you” at the end of the interview. Pure gold.

I then started to watch some of the interviews and boy was that a mistake!!! I literally couldn’t get enough. So I watched all and I say all their interviews, it was the best. We got some gems:

“Why aren’t you looking at me as much”

“Which way is the beach Seabass”

*Them saying nonsense in Spanish and then Sebastian Saying Papi Chulo*

¨And so many more, ....

I watched other solo Anthony interviews and he was still HILARIOUS, but you could also tell he felt a little bit more at ease with Sebastian around. I won’t pretend I know him or his personality, but Sebastian seems like a little bit more of an introvert and looks like he doesn’t enjoy the interview experience unless Anthony id around him. Just my thoughts

I watched the interviews before I went to see the movie, I even cosplayed as the Winter Soldier to the movie premiere and I was IN!!! When I saw Captain America Civil War, I became a SamBucky shipper, these two were hilarious and I really so the potential for a great realtionship I love enemy to lovers stories.

I also shipped Stucky because, to me, the trope of the movie was Superhero gives up everything to protect his long term friend” Hollywood movies have some codes and if Bucky were a female character, there is no doubt in my mind that the movie would have been marketed as romance.

Stucky really was an easy ship! But then the MCU fandom of Tumblr fandom messed up everything for me. You see I really liked the CACW and I I liked Stucky, I liked Sambucky, and I loved the introduction of t’Challa’s character, but one of things that affected me the most in the movie was that it was the first blockbuster I watched with 3 black main characters, Rhodey, Sam and T’Challa. That, and the fact that they were planning to realease a Black Panther movie in two years, I was super excited, and that’s the main reason I got involved in the MCU fandom so much, when before, I was just a casual watcher.

If this seem weird to you, then you have no idea how we were only getting crumbs before. For me it was soo huge, I even told all my friends, and they were laughing at me. But usually blockbusters, especially superhero movies get one black character and that’s it, usually the best friend or something and never the leads. So, for me it really was a big deal. How sad is that by the way…

I became more involved in the fandom and, at first, I wasn’t focusing on anything special, Sambucky, Stucky, Stackie, the Black Panther, and even Zemo, whose character I really liked.

But soon I noticed that the CACW tags were always flooded, and I mean flooded with the same two white characters: Steve and Bucky. I told myself, ok that’s fine Steve is the lead after all, but it would be good to see the other characters too.

And then I noticed another interesting trend: Evanstan…. Wait what?

Chris Evans, and Sebastian Stan… did I miss something? Listen, obviously I’m sure they must be friends or something, but you’re going to tell me you watch all MCU the actors and you’re going to focus on Steve and Sebastian? I’m sorry what?

Sebastian and Anthony are right there… Or Chris and Anthony, they even have a secret handshake, only the 2 of them do… what more do you want?

Tell me one iconic Evanstan moment… go ahead tell me… See??? There isn’t.

Because of this and because of how badly some Stuckies were treating Sam and Anthony. I became less and less of a stucky shipper . I mainly focused on SamBucky, Stackie and the Black Panther,

And then the Sebastian Stan stans saw how popular Stackie, Sambucky, were becoming and I started to see some problematic stuff in our fandom too.

I don’t want to generalize, but when you go into the Stackie tag, and you see cropped pictures of Sebastian without Anthony, it’s easy to assume that a Sebastian fan did that. And we know damn well you cropped out Anthony because we watched all Stackie interviews and know exactly which interview your picture was taken from. We know that Anthony was sitting right next to Seb.

You post a picture of Sebastian laughing but you crop out the person who was making him laugh??

“but it has nothing to do with race” How do you know that?

“Sebastian had more screen time” More screen time than Anthony in CATWS or CACW? I don’t think so.

“I have been a fan of Sebastian for longer”, that’s fine but don’t go out cropping Anthony, just post gifs of Seb in his usual, sad, and Anthony-less interviews, not the ones where he’s smiling because his best friend is next to him.

Some of you really are the worst. And just so you know, your fave Sebastian is Anthony’s biggest fan, if he saw pictures where you cropped out Anthony, he would block you on the spot.

When I realized that Anthony Mackie would be the next Captain America I was screaming, no actually, I was crying, Sam Wilson will be Captain America, and Anthony would finally get the recognition he deserves.

You would think that the MCU fandom would focus on Captain America or at least one the two leads, instead of just Sebastian? Right? Right? WRONG.

Anthony is handsome, he’s funny, he’s a great actor, he went to freaking Julliard, he’s at the top, I don’t see what else the man can do??? He should already be a superstar, but no, you will side-line him even to he is the lead of the show.

Even when they are the actual leads, you guys would do anything to bring up the White characters even if it means ignoring the Black characters.

I remember I was having a conversation about Black Panther with my friends and I asked one of my white friends who was his favorite character in BP was and he told me Martin Freeman (don’t even remember his name in the movie) Martin Freaking Freeman, there are half a dozen of great characters and your fave is the only white man??? Ok, ok, that’s great.

Don’t give out automatic reply like “It has nothing to do with race, if you haven’t thought about it first”, because there’s a high probability that it is indeed about race. Stop saying it isn’t, sit down and ask yourself, “Am I biased?” “Why am I reblogging only stuff related to the white characters”.

One of these days you guys are going to make me hate Sebastian with the sh*t you are pulling.

I looove the Stackie friendship and the Sambucky dynamic but after seeing the way some of you treat Anthony and Sam’s character, it make me want to focus on Sam’s character and forget about the rest.

I remember they were some posts about how Anthony was problematic, and I just lost it. Apparently, there was an old article that resurfaced were Anthony was making a joke about women making sandwiches or something.

If you were offended by the sandwich joke, that is totally ok, and I can understand that.

But if you were offended by the sandwich joke, and saying Anthony is problematic BUT you still stan Chris Evans, Jeremy Renner, ScarJo or even Sebastian Stan, just know that there is a high probability you’re racist.

They have all said or done problematic stuff, and people only seem to remember stuff related to Anthony, which was probably just a joke by the way.

Chris Evans and Jeremy called Black widow a wh*re, ScarJo took roles that she maybe shouldn’t have and I didn’t forget Sebastian shady Instagram post, when Kaepernick was kneeling. There are so many more things to be said about Jeremy Renner but google is your friend.

Anthony also got hate for hating on Tom Holland? Like what? Do you guys even hear yourselves? Don’t you have any friends you like to tease? If you hate someone, do you go around talking about him every chance you get? It was obviously friendly banter but some people wanted to turn it into something it was not. Sigh.

I really cannot with this fandom

The stackie fandom was small at the beginning and the Sambucky fandom even smaller, but we were there and it was amazing. Sebastian and Anthony received the same amount of love from the fandom and I wish we could go back to those days.

Stop pretending the fandom isn’t racist. Stop saying “it isn’t about race” when you haven’t even thought about.

Saying “it has nothing to do with race” only shows that you haven’t thought about anything but don’t want to be called a racist.

There is racism in this fandom and it will always be there, but if you guys want to do anything about it, you have to acknowledge it first.

You can’t be pulling off stuff like “I don’t see colors”, “ it has nothing to do with race”. Stop, sit down, think about it and then we can have a conversation.

If you’ve made it till the end, I apologize for the typos and grammar mistakes, I wasn’t planning on writing this much.

#tfatws #anthony mackie #Sebastian Stan #stackie #sambucky #Chris Evans #captain america #CACW #fandom racism #I didn't mean to write this much #my posts

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dereksmcgrath · 3 years

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I had said before that the number 108 can be unlucky. It wasn’t unlucky at all for My Hero Academia: Vigilantes. But 108 is kind of unlucky for this episode: not only are we focusing on the Villains, but we just aren’t giving their story the structure and emotional weight it deserves.

(I either opened with those remarks or just made a bunch of corny jokes about how “Meta Liberation Army” can be abbreviated as MLA--and I’m saving those jokes for a future review.)

“My Villain Academia,” My Hero Academia Episode 108 (Season 5, Episode 20)

An adaptation of Chapters 220, 221, 222, 223, and 224 of the manga, by Kohei Horikoshi, translated by Caleb Cook with lettering by John Hunt and available from Viz.

My Hero Academia is available to stream on Crunchyroll and Funimation.

Spoilers up to My Hero Academia Chapter 325.

When I teach literature, I refer to the plot as a problem: it is something that the protagonist is trying to solve. This problem can take various forms, but it is often as an antagonist that the protagonist confronts. When this episode has the Doctor refer to a “villain” as someone “who turns nonsense into action,” that’s kind of the point: the villain is here to get the plot rolling. Without them, you don’t have a hero, you don’t have a story.

It has been long accepted by a lot of fans and scholars that superheroes tend to uphold the status quo. I think the first time I gained awareness of this popular argument--although likely not the first time I encountered it--was Dr. Horrible’s mangled remark that “the status is not quo.” More recently, however, I have been reading academic books on superheroes, and not only does that argument persist--that superheroes represent law, order, and upholding traditional norms even in the face of new evidence or out of sheer obliviousness to the need for systemic change--but the argument has become that, if a superhero story does not have the heroes doing something to effect systemic change, then it’s not a good story. I may be misunderstanding that argument, but if I don’t, then it’s not an argument I can stand behind.

The argument is that superhero stories tend to reduce complex issues to having avatars for each side of the issue--the good guy and the bad guy--get into a fight, where we are focused on the spectacle rather than on seeing actual people engaging in the actual work needed to address problems not on the individual level--again, one good guy physically fighting one bad guy--but on a larger scope.

I am oversimplifying this argument, as even those same scholars will point out that, initially, of course there were superhero stories that had the protagonist taking the fight against the system. Superman is one of the ones named most frequently, whether in his initial comic book premiere doing what police and media would not to face down a corrupt senator (a sign of things to come in his later fights with Luthor and in Justice League Unlimited) or fighting the Klan (in the meta sense, fighting their analogue on the radio show and, more recently, literally in the comics). It kind of makes Superman look like one influence on the Peerless Thief in My Hero Academia, but we’ll get to him far later in these episodic reviews.

Even with that exception of Superman, it’s not hard for me to agree with the argument that heroes prop up the status quo. That has been the plot point for My Hero Academia and why this war against the villains has been incoming: a system that depended on just All Might, now depending on a wife-beating abusive father like Endeavor with his crimes not popularly known, has a level of corruption that cannot stand up with just one man’s shining example of honest goodness and integrity to be the Symbol of Peace. It was why I appreciated the manga eventually showing that, yes, there was an entire network of assassins within the Hero Public Safety Commission to keep All Might’s hands clean--and, in retrospect, while Lady Nagant was our first named example, given what Hawks ends up doing to Twice, deadly force may be frowned upon by law in MHA but has to have been something Hawks was told he had legal authority to do. (Also, as I will never stop pointing out, Endeavor unintentionally and unknowingly killed another Pro Hero in Vigilantes, and we’re just supposed to pretend that was fine.)

But going back to this academic argument, about how superhero stories tend to stick to one-on-one battles and don’t let the heroes effect systematic change, I’m ambivalent. There have been a range of superhero or superhero-adjacent stories that have the protagonist making on-page, on-screen, obvious work to not just get into fisticuffs with the bad guy. I already pointed out Superman’s first appearance and his fight against the Klan. I can also identify other examples, some hamfisted like Captain Planet, others more nuanced like Korra reaching out to Kuvira in The Legend of Korra. While the scholarship I read bristles at the idea of reducing these fights to just avatars for good and evil, I shrug and say that kind of comes with the territory of a superhero story. I hate justifying tropes: it’s like saying “this fanservice is acceptable because that’s part of the genre”--which leads to its own set of problems, especially when I hear fools defending sexualized fanservice that is just not needed for the story and is abusive by gender and representation. Heck, The Brave and the Bold animated series had Equinox and Batman battle as giants representing the avatars of chaos and order--which is confusing enough, with Equinox having a vaguely yin-yang motif that debunks any clean separation between chaos and order. And yet, here I am, arguing that this kind of fanservice of a hero and a villain beating each other up is to be expected: you have a debate about ideals of what a hero should do when you see Iron Man and Captain America each representing a side in a fight, whether the poorly handled comic book Civil War or the better film version, and even then, that film also lets the individual personalities get in the way of saying anything meaningful about government oversight and individual agency, ideas better handled in that other Captain America film, The Winter Soldier, and even then that film also gets stuck in just being about Steve and Bucky’s relationship.

All of this is me saying that, when you add a superhero to the fight, you’re going to feel disappointed that almost nothing systematically changes in its setting, not only because, as I’m hinting, these are stories about individuals fighting each other and not stories about the individual against society or nature, but also because a superhero can only change so much of their world for the better before that world no longer looks like our own or a new societal problem has to emerge to create the problem that is the plot itself for wherever the story goes next. Once a hero makes the setting into a utopia, either a new problem emerges to show the fiction of that story and that a dystopia is always married to a utopia, or the utopia is revealed to be hollow (Shigaraki’s word of the day) and fake. My Hero Academia already showed the utopia of a world where people get to live with their Quirks is fake, not only by (largely necessary) regulation of those Quirks but also, as we’ll see more with Spinner, Compress, Toga, Gigantomachia, and others, looking different, or being socially aware, or having disabilities, or being the “wrong” size, excluded you from that society.

What I’m trying to say is that, once you add superheroes into a story to fix the problem, you can’t show what systematic change looks like. How do you write a story where it makes sense that no hero came to save Tenko Shimura from becoming Tomura Shigaraki? What’s a story like My Hero Academia supposed to do to show the problems with a society, if you have superheroes who can fix those problems by beating up the bad guys?

Solution: You have the bad guys beat each other up.

In this corner, the League of Villains, people who were made outcasts because they did not fit in--which reveals the flaws of a society that is not accepting people who may not be able to change their past or their bodily conditions.

And in this corner, the Meta Liberation Army--which reveals how society breeds people in business, media, and politics who abuse laws and societal norms to elevate themselves and create a social Darwinist nightmare.

Granted, these are some foolish schmucks for starting up this fight in public, but I’ll address how the MLA just doesn’t work in a later episode review.

But for now, let the fight begin. No matter who wins, at least we see how society at large allowed these Villains to emerge--and we can either see All For One’s dictatorial forces get wrecked, or see Re-Destro’s fascistic oafs get wrecked.

Unfortunately, no matter who wins, the Pro Heroes are going to lose, too.

I am overly impressed with myself for realizing all of this. And I say “overly” not only because this is arrogant of me but also because I’m pretty sure just about every other person following this series already came to this conclusion: if you want to show actual systematic change, you have to show what the villains are up to, because they are the ones showing the holes in our society that need to be fixed. Either a villain exploits those holes to cause damage to people, or the villain is themselves representative of unfairness in the system and, by breaking the law to save themselves and others, are unfairly maligned as villains.

That being said, I’m not a big fan of the “[Insert villain’s name here] was right” arguments. Yes, Magneto is justified in his goals and ethics, and the debate is the means he takes to them, so his existence is to show why the X-Men are screwing up and need to be more radical. Yes, Killmonger is right that Wakanda’s isolationism is reckless and allows for travesties to persist, but his choices are largely out of individual desire for vengeance, so he’s an example that T’Challa can follow. Taken too far, though, and you get people who preach anti-establishment notions without having an alternative or are just trying to sound edgy rather than actually pointing to the actual problem: it’s someone who celebrates the Joker without recognizing that, no, you don’t want to be that asshole, or who celebrate villain-turned-hero Vegeta just because he looks cool and without appreciating what steps he took to change and what fall he experienced before he got to the point of being a villain.

In all these cases, if done poorly, you have the same tired trend of a villain existing only so long so that the hero changes for the better. It’s as tiresome as I unfortunately sometimes feel reading post after post celebrating how complex and sympathetic the League of Villains’ members can be when, still, a lot of them are just assholes using empty excuses to defend atrocious behavior (primarily, just All for One) or, for the most part, are people put into desperate situations (Shigaraki, Toga, Spinner, Dabi, Twice) who are doing the best they can (Twice, Spinner) even if their actions are not defensible (Toga) or also out of line (Shigaraki) due to their own refusal to seek the legitimate help they need to work through their issues (Dabi).

It’s hard to read posts online calling the League members sympathetic when we have not had a chance in the anime to know their full story. And as with the slow revelation that this setting is not really as welcoming of people of all shapes and sizes as initially hinted, so too do the villains’ backstories show that they were justified in some actions they took, except for those that led to deaths. Too bad none of that really pops up in a meaningful way in this episode that would rather tease out Shigaraki’s back story, keep dangling the obvious answer to who Dabi really is, and short-sells what should be a meaningful friendship between Twice and Giran but is just dropped as fast as Shigaraki takes off Twice’s mask. Jeez, Shigaraki, that is a dick move to Twice…

But I’m already on Page 4 of this rant, so let’s get to the episode already.

Pulling back the curtain yet again, these reviews tend to follow a pattern. Since I first wrote about the MHA anime, my process would be to first re-read the chapters, then watch the episode in Japanese, then watch the episode in English, so as to retrace my steps in how I first encountered most of these stories, as well as to see any patterns in the production process moving from manga to anime to localization. But with this episode, that practice was made nearly impossible given how prevalent the hostility towards this episode, this arc, and this season have been, especially when a friend shared numerous reactions from other viewers about this episode. Seriously, for all the whining I just did the previous four pages, you could read this person or this person who are much better at explaining why the introduction of Re-Destro to the anime sucks, for more than one reason.

So, I had a different approach: I already had the flaws to this episode shared with me by other viewers, then I listened to the English dub, then I re-read the chapters, then I watched the Japanese dub with English subtitles.

And, boy, am I grateful I took that approach, because this episode is a ton of talking--too much talking. For an anime adaptation that cut so much of Spinner’s Leonardo from Ninja Turtles narration, I’m shocked that they kept the boring parts of his narration and cut the only good parts, including the very opening that had a lot more action and gave us a reason to sympathize with these Villains.

I know I’m a snob regarding animation; I have expressed before how, despite my love for animated works, I tend to appreciate them more for what they do with storytelling rather than the spectacle of the visuals. I really dislike works where the value of the work is in the animation alone: I am here to see a story unfold, and if there is no narrative, no plot, no beginning-middle-and-end, then what I’m encountering is a museum piece, not a work of cinema. (Feel free to bash me for that hot take: I’m still railing against Patty Jenkins’s ridiculous argument from this week.)

And as with most forms of karmic punishment I experience, I pay the price: if I rail long enough about works that are only all about the animation and not the story, then my punishment is an episode where all we get is a lot of story and not much in the way of animation. Yet I can’t even say we got a story here, so much as back story, exposition, needless narration--it’s Blade Runner only bad. As much as I have loved how this anime’s storyboards stick so close to the manga panels, the pan over the League listening to Shigaraki’s vague back story felt like the least interesting way to handle this scene, especially when it excises so much of Spinner coming around from questioning Shigaraki to sympathizing with him. Who would have imagined cutting so much of Spinner’s initial narration and the opening from Chapter 220 would screw up how to adapt Shigaraki’s back story from Chapter 222.

The anime cuts how this arc begins in the manga: Chapter 220 starts with Spinner facing off against an extremist group that hates him for his reptilian appearance--a moment that would have garnered more sympathy from the audience for these Villains than this episode is exhorting. We needed a scene to get behind these villains and agree with them, before we are shocked to hear Shigaraki say what we have long expected, that he just wants to destroy everything and make everyone as miserable as he has felt, to wake us up that, no, you may sympathize with these outcasts (to use Twice’s one-word self-description), but you shouldn’t agree with Shigaraki’s goals. (I know Shigaraki relents somewhat when asked by Toga, but it’s hard to backtrack from “destroy it all” to “destroy it all but not the stuff my friends like.” How on Earth is Shigaraki going to destroy Izuku when Spinner somewhat admires the guy and Toga...well, yeah, best left unsaid.)

While watching this episode, I also was reviewing other topics about anime and manga I’m going to go into more detail about later this month, and one topic of discussion is the assumption that anime and manga, by their visual style and story tropes, especially shojo and shonen, tend to be about big expressions--emotional outpours in words, movements, facial expressions, and actions to more easily communicate what is happening, regardless of context.

I hate to keep repeating “ambivalent” in my reviews (another academic word I need to expunge from my lexicon for a bit), but I’m ambivalent about that argument, that anime and manga, especially shojo and shonen, are better at communicating. If your character is unreadable, that likely has an intentional reason: we don’t get much of a read on the Doctor in this episode, not helped by his mustache and glasses, but we also don’t get a read on what Shigaraki is up to.

This episode only heightens my regard, not just about anime, manga, shojo, or shonen, but in animation and comics at large, that not everything is readable in what a character is planning.

On the one hand, I do agree that visual works tend to make ideas easier to comprehend for some people who can engage with such visual works. As someone who teaches English literature and writing in a United States setting, I use comics in my teaching to cross language and cultural barriers, especially for students for whom English is not their primary language or who are the first in their family raised in the United States. And this teaching approach also helps in reverse: I include manga and anime in my teaching to show how not all details cross language and cultural barriers in a one-to-one correspondence, hence the challenges of translation and localization, and how all of us struggle to make ourselves understood within our own primary language to someone else who is fluent in that language, let alone trying to translate into another language or to present ourselves in a different set of cultural norms.

On the other hand, anime and manga are not a fixed genre. Yes, I agree that the images tend to emphasize big eyes, big expressions, and big motions--but that’s like saying all animation is Looney Tunes, or all animation is Disney, or is Dragon Ball, and so on. Likewise, as I’ve discussed elsewhere, shonen is more than just one type of storytelling, and the same goes for shojo. This arc of My Hero Academia is placing focus, after admittedly far too long, on the Villains as the protagonists--and their behavior pokes holes in the idea that things are obvious, when the Villains are themselves such liars, so crafty, have their own hidden agendas, are keeping secrets from each other. It’s as if their behavior is a commentary on this plot and how BONES is adapting it: the Villains are keeping secrets, so this plot is going to keep its secrets for just who Re-Destro and the Meta Liberation Army are, what their personalities are like, and what Shigaraki and the Doctor have in mind for getting what he wants. We’re even kept in the dark as to Shigaraki’s full back story; we’re in the same position he is, knowing just little bits and able to make assumptions from a handful of visual cues and memories, without fully knowing who the hell Tenko is. Add to that Spinner’s struggles to narrate all of this and to get into Toga’s mind and Shigaraki’s mind, as well as Dabi’s own secrets and agenda with Hawks, and we have a story that blows up the notion that anime and manga are easier for reading a character’s mindset: no, they are not always easier, not when the creators deliberately mislead the audience or keep them in the dark for a surprise.

By keeping so much of the audience in the dark, so that we become aware of how deceitful villains can be, and we are put into Shigaraki’s place of not knowing where he came from. This should be a set of brilliant choices by BONES to adapt this arc in this manner. But the problem is, no, almost none of this gets anywhere close to brilliant. It’s not brilliant--it’s frustrating, because we already know what is going to happen. You can just pull up the manga at low cost with a Viz account and read all of this in the order it was originally presented and get the answers ahead of time. And if you’ve been reading the manga all along, you already know how this arc ends, and you know stuff from the next set of arcs so that you do know already what Shigaraki’s back story is, what Dabi was really up to, who survives, who dies. You even learn more about Compress’s back story--stuff that really should have been hinted at much earlier in the manga, and could have been hinted in this adaptation but as of this episode has not.

Maybe that is why the anime removes Re-Destro murdering his assistant: it’s such an odd moment that it is challenging for me to get a read on Re-Destro, as he alternates in the manga between being very friendly and devoted to his comrades but also violent and heartless.

It may be obvious that I didn’t like much of this episode. I think when I stopped taking this episode seriously was when I heard the voices. Like I said, I tend to start with the Japanese dub first before getting to the English dub. And I have nothing at all against English dubs: I would not be listening to them as much as I have, often first before I ever hear the Japanese, and I would not be a fan of so many English-speaking actors in dubs if I had any animosity to the craft, their work, and the benefit they provide for creating a larger audience for these stories. And nothing against Larry Brantley and Sonny Strait, but some of this casting feels off. I wasn’t able to take this episode seriously as soon as I heard the voice distortion that was used for Re-Destro’s phone call: that took me out of the story. If I had the chance for localization, I would really need Twice or someone to call out how freaking ridiculous that Mickey Mouse voice sounded. You have freaking Sonny Strait here: use the Krillin voice, use the Chibi Ragnarok voice, use the Usopp voice--use something, really go bizarre here, it’s just a voice distortion device! And as I said, nothing against Strait, but when I hear Re-Destro when I read the manga, that’s not the voice I have in mind. For right now, HIroaki Hirata in the Japanese dub is closer to that smoothness I expected for this character. But I have no doubt Strait will do excellent as Re-Destro’s empowered form: think Strait’s role in The Intruder II from Toonami. It’s just that Re-Destro in the English dub is lacking that odd refinement I was expecting.

Granted, it’s the same problem for me when I hear Brantley as Spinner: I am making unfair assumptions that don’t suit the goals of the creators when it comes to this character. It is sadly not as obvious in this episode as it is in the manga: this arc in the manga starts with Horikoshi invoking Laird and Eastman’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles by having Spinner, who is already a sword-wielding reptilian martial artist, narrating just like how Leonardo narrating at the beginning of the very first issue of TMNT. I wanted a voice for the English dub that is like Leonardo’s, a little higher pitch and more youthful, like what Brian Tochi brought in the live-action Turtles film or what Cam Clarke and Michael Sinterniklaas bring in the animated versions. I think, for the Japanese dub, Ryo Iwasaki’s performance as Spinner is very close to what I expected. But that also may seem too obvious: Spinner may be young, but giving him an older-sounding voice can belie his inexperience, youthfulness, and naivete, similar to how people make assumptions about him by his reptilian appearance. The anime is putting me into my place--I think of Spinner one way other than who he really is, so I’m no better than the people around him who have discriminated against him for his physical appearance.

Just as I have a set of assumptions that unfairly influence how I would cast Spinner, I also think Re-Destro should have sounded more refined and less graveley in the English dub. But my expectations belie that, just the Joker whom he resembles, Re-Destro puts on this cultured facade to hide that he is just another violent gangster thug, someone who would kill his own assistant. I know I cited examples above about how complex Re-Destro is, but it’s hard for me to see him as sympathetic just because he’s crying over something he did out of his own volition: he coldly killed his office assistant Miyashita, his tears and kind words don’t suddenly make this a warm and cuddly death, we don’t get to think of him as our woobie. It only makes it more irritating that BONES so far has cut not only that scene of Re-Destro killing Miyashita but also Re-Destro’s TV commercial: it would clue us in that the reason he has that gravelly voice is because, no matter how much he tries to present himself on TV, he is not that kind of a man.

But since I invoked the Joker comparison to Re-Destro, yeah, I’m disappointed we didn’t get Troy Baker as Re-Destro, as unlikely as I imagine that would be to happen, regardless of Baker’s previous work with Funimation. It does lend a bit more to conspiracy theories on my part, though, given casting director Colleen Clinkenbeard telling Twitter followers to stop expecting Mark Hamill in MHA, it’s never happening--we can’t even get Troy Baker doing his Mark Hamill Joker.

(I’m not being fair to Baker: I’m not saying his Joker is at all bad--it is not, he has been excellent as Joker, especially playing him and Batman in the Ninja Turtles crossover film, but it is obvious Baker is performing the kind of Joker that came out of Hamill, so I’m trying to say he’s doing the “Hamill Joker,” rather than the “Nicholson Joker,” the “Ledger Joker,” or the “Caesar Romero Joker”).

It’s also a challenge to sympathize with these characters when we aren’t getting what this arc should give them: a re-introduction. I hate approaching this episode in a post-James Gunn The Suicide Squad world, but seeing how much MHA owes to not The Suicide Squad of the comics but that motif in so many superhero comics, there is that missed opportunity to reacquaint the audience with who are the members of the League of Villains. So, where the hell is my freeze-frame re-introduction to each League member? There was that fan theory a long time ago that Giran was really Present Mic in disguise: imagine doing Present Mic’s introduction of characters by name, Quirk, and pithy comment, only it’s Giran in the announcer seat this time.

(Don’t even get me started on how annoying it is to have Izuku handling the post-credit preview: give that to Spinner.)

Again, maybe it is brilliant for BONES not to include some re-introduction scenes, whether narrated by Giran or happening naturally in conversation between these characters. These Villains barely know each other’s back story, so there’s no artifice where they would believably share their back stories to each other in conversation in this context. And as I said, Shigaraki does not know enough about his own past, and Dabi is hiding his real identity. But when we’re stuck with Spinner as our half-hearted narrator, who seems not to know why he and Toga are still here with Stain being gone, and when Toga is this dull in her answer about what keeps her going after Stain’s arrest, and when Spinner himself seems not to know what he’s still doing here, all of that does not communicate a reason for us to keep going with this story.

I know this arc is going to get better, storywise at least, just based on how it went in the manga. I can only hope that the animation can capture the chaos that the original manga illustrations showed. But I am trying to think what a new viewer is going to do if this is their introduction to this series. I’m not invoking the Episode 7 Rule, I’m not doing a hypothetical experiment to gauge which episodes are the best to bring a newbie into this series--I am asking, honestly, if a fan was already into this series, and was watching it one Saturday morning, and a friend or roommate or relative saw them watching, they would be utterly lost about why they should care about this. Even the explanation for why Twice is indebted to Giran is presented as such an afterthought that does disservice to a potentially emotional moment, to what is supposed to be a pretty deep friendship, as deep as it can be for a weapons trader like Giran and an outcast-turned-criminal like Twice, so that, when Twice helps rescue Giran, we feel that emotional payoff.

It is honestly shocking that, for all the throwbacks, recaps, and flashbacks we get, including how Giran’s fingers match up to previous places where the League fought, that this still leaves a new viewer in the dark. And the problem lies at the feet of MHA arriving at a fifth-season slump: the series has gone on so long that things feel lazy and making far too many assumptions on what knowledge the audience is bringing. You’re not getting a bigger audience if you keep appealing to the diehard fans and the people reading the manga. After all, why would you keep doing ridiculous recaps and flashbacks if the fans already know what happened?

But speaking of the recaps and flashbacks, that should have been how this episode redeemed itself. As I said last time, if you re-worked the order of episodes to start with the Oboro Shirakumo story, that would be more shocking. But what if this episode could have been the very first episode of the season, and following the trend of previous seasons, make it a recap episode? We already had Izuku narrating a clip show, Class 1A at the pool, a photojournalist visiting the UA Dorms--it would be so much more interesting seeing “League of Villains camping in the woods while in the background Shigaraki gets squished by a giant.” Have the Villains tell campfire stories about how they got here: it would be a great excuse to re-use the animation and save on the budget. You could fit in a few gags, as Toga starts telling a really gruesome story but gets distracted by all the blood in it, while Twice’s story bounces between sugar-sweet happy and grim-and-dark chaos, while Compress and Spinner are stuck trying to keep them focused. It’d be a hell of a lot more interesting than how BONES somehow screwed up a potentially emotional volatile moment between Izuku and Amajiki that would put into question whether Izuku is going to have to kill a Villain and just how devastated Amajiki feels after Mirio lost his Quirk.

And speaking of whether Izuku is going to have to kill a Villain: obviously, this arc is setting up how much more dangerous Shigaraki is than UA gave him credit. Back in Season 2, I hated how Nezu and UA staff referred to him as a “man-child,” given the connotations that have surrounded masculinity and being a man. I wrote that before 2016; in this post-2016 atmosphere, and the increased prevalence of toxic masculinity, I am, once again, that annoying word ambivalent. I am likewise ambivalent how well this series has shown Shigaraki to be able to form the plan he does by episode’s end. We’re only told by Spinner how much faster Shigaraki is getting and how much slower Gigantomachia has become--but the animation doesn’t show that. And we’re being told how great Shigaraki’s plan is--when it sounds ridiculous.

By cutting so much of Spinner’s narration from the manga, we also don’t get a scene where Spinner confronts Shigaraki to ask him what is his plan. Up to that point, Shigaraki has said that, with Kurogiri gone over the last month and the computers at the old League hideout destroyed, they can’t reach the Doctor. Spinner is insistent: what is the plan? Shigaraki responds that he just told them--as Gigantomachia crashes through their hideout. The other characters explain for readers like me who aren’t following: Shigaraki just said Kurogiri was gone; to contact the Doctor, Kurogiri sought Gigantomachia; Gigantomachia would sniff out where Shigaraki is and bring him to the Doctor. Brilliant--that shows more attention to Shigaraki’s planning and scheming, and now, it’s not even here in the episode to make me think this guy is that smart. (This episode also had Shigaraki reveal his plan to have Gigantomachia attack the MLA, whereas it was Spinner who predicted that was going to be Shigaraki’s plan--so, again, we’re not letting Spinner stand out as smarter than we expected, either.)

I know Shigaraki is supposed to be our chessmaster, given his association with gaming, especially when he was faking his ignorance about shogi to lower Overhaul’s guard before defeating him and stealing his Quirk-cancelling bullets. But I’m having the same problem I had when following All For One throughout this anime: it just feels like these two antagonists are getting ahead out of sheer luck and because everyone else is a fool, not because either of them are that great as villains. Give me a Xanatos, give me a Luthor, give me a Norman Osborne (not Clone Saga Osborne, a different one). Show me Shigaraki is more than a pawn for All For One and the Doctor, because I don’t feel anything here, not even when we’re supposed to feel that Shigaraki has some legitimate concern for All For One that just isn’t getting communicated to me, whether by my stubbornness or because the content is not giving the animators and actors what they deserve. Eric Vale can sell the hell out of a scene, but Shigaraki’s talk about All For One is not giving that opportunity to the actor.

My remarks this time are a lot more disorganized and doesn’t really arrive at any conclusion. I have more to say about how this arc works and doesn’t work, especially when it comes to how ridiculous the MLA comes across in underestimating the League, but we’ll get to that next time.

#my hero academia #shigaraki #league of villains #meta liberation army #spinner #long post #mha spoilers

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beyondspaceandstars · 3 years

Text

While You Sleep

Chapter 16

Relationship: Bucky Barnes x Reader Warnings: mentions of violence Summary: Soulmate!AU - Throughout life, you’re given glimpses of your soulmate through dreams. As you sleep, memories flash in your mind showing you the life your soulmate has lived. Everyone around you raves about how their soulmate reads great books or volunteers in their spare time. But you can’t relate as your dreams end up being more like nightmares. Through initial images of death and violence, you come to learn your soulmate is the Winter Soldier.

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

“You’re coming to me about soulmate bonds?” Bruce Banner asked for what seemed like the umpteenth time. Once again, you and Bucky nodded in sync, standing awkwardly in the middle of his lab.

Bruce let out a sigh as he turned back to whatever he had been working on. He hadn’t totally dismissed you two yet, thankfully, so you were just forced to stand there, waiting.

When Bucky had told you this was who would potentially help you, you were a bit hesitant. You had only encountered Bruce briefly in your time at the compound. In fact, you hadn’t really gotten to know anyone outside of Bucky and Steve. So, coming to an Avenger, let alone a literal nationally recognized genius, for help with such a thing...made you nervous, to say the least. You’d have to confess your troubles to a third party once more.

But Bucky assured you over and over again that Bruce could be trusted. He didn’t know the scale of his research on the topic but he felt he was a trustworthy person for this. Eventually, you agreed. After your first shift back at work - a new addition back to your routine as you worked to regain some stability - Bucky took you over to the compound. You had thought he had gotten an appointment or at least gave Bruce some kind of rundown on the proposal but, apparently, no.

“What makes you think I can answer any questions on that?” Bruce grumbled as he furiously wrote notes on his current project. You and Bucky shared a look.

“I heard you did some research on it,” Bucky explained.

Bruce huffed. “So?”

“So,” Bucky sighed, “we think we… we have a problem with ours.”

This vague statement was enough for Bruce to perk up a bit. His writing had stopped. He was looking forward now, away from the project. “A problem?” Bruce asked, slightly glancing over his shoulder.

You shifted your weight as you stood a bit uncomfortable with the admission out in the open. Bucky, though, was the definition of cool, calm, and collected. You were just a little bit jealous of him.

Bucky nodded. “To put it simply, my girl has nightmares.”

Bruce seemed very interested now. He finally turned back around, facing you two fully once again. He looked intrigued but not really excited. You wondered greatly what his research really encompassed.

“Nightmares?” Bruce was beginning to sound like some sad echo. But you and Bucky just went with it, nodding your head in confirmation. Bruce continued, “I don’t think I’ve ever heard of nightmares. They’re dreams we have — soulmate dreams.”

You sighed, greatly out of annoyance. You’d been hearing the same thing day after day after day for years. “I know,” you finally said. “I am well aware of that but it just isn’t how ours work. I’ve only ever seen the…bad things Bucky has encountered. And for a while, after we met, they stopped.”

“As you would hope.”

You nodded. “But then that…thing happened. And it’s all started over again except somehow stronger. I’m seeing it all through Bucky’s eyes. Through his feelings. Through his — his everything. I’m back there twice over and many times after.”

Bruce shook his head as if he couldn’t believe it. You didn’t know what to do. Bucky was very tense beside you, hands balled into tight fists waiting as anxiously as you for Bruce to just say something about it. But he didn’t, not yet, as he raced over to his desk. From one of the drawers, a very particularly locked one, Bruce pulled out a file. He flicked it open and began reading, his finger roaming over the pages wildly, hunting for whatever it was he needed. You and Bucky just watched the situation unfold, practically holding your breaths.

Eventually, Bruce walked back over, a very specific page opened in the filed documents. You couldn’t make out what it was about from your sneaky glance so you waited for the genius to begin. He looked between you and Bucky, jaw slacked in amazement and concerned.

“Before I get into this, I want you both to promise me this knowledge doesn’t leave this lab unless it is on my account, okay?” He spoke strongly and seriously. You two nodded. Once he was pleased, Bruce looked back at the file and began, “Gosh, I can’t believe I forgot about this… You were right, Bucky, I have researched soulmate bonds. I didn’t do it for long, God knows it’s a hot topic, but part of my research involved what I nicknamed toxic bonds.” He looked pointedly at you two. “It just started out as a little theory stemming from the old stories about soulmates ‘moving on.’ It’s really a bit more than just not liking someone. This theory revolves around stories of soulmates, in these cases, receiving unflattering or uninteresting dreams from their partnered mates. I was basing these off the accounts of long ago as there are no known partners that fit this mold. At least, until now.” Bruce motioned between you two. You didn’t like where this was all going. “I believe what you two share is a toxic bond, a sort of glitch in Fate. Except, where you two fall flat in this is the fact the nightmares have come back. All dreams change after meeting your soulmate, right?” No one said anything. Bruce continued, “Yes, they technically should. Something has in fact fallen off with you two. I can’t say what but it doesn’t add it and could be significant to this research. With permission, I would like to run some tests on each of you.”

You stiffened. “T-Tests?” While you should be kind of relieved there’s some answer - or idea - for what you’re experiencing, you were suddenly hung up on the prospect of being an experiment. Bucky’s hand reached out to grasp yours, trying to offer some comfort. The thought of being strapped to a chair flashed through your mind. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Bucky shoot Bruce a harsh look.

“Nothing harmful, I promise,” Bruce insisted. “I would just like to take a peek into your brains, into the bond.”

“That’s possible?” Bucky asked. You were glad he at least had the strength to speak.

“It’s attached to the brain function in various ways,” Bruce explained. “A look into your brainwaves can tell me a lot. Or nothing, if that's the case, too.”

You knew you were doing an absolutely horrible job at hiding your worries but, thankfully, neither man was bringing much attention to it. They just looked at you, waiting for an answer. You were quite impressed by how Bucky was just going along with this. But, at the same time, there was a reason he came here instead of seeking a true outsider. If this was okay with Bucky, it was going to have to be okay with you. At least this time, you weren’t being thrown in a chair alone.

“Okay,” you nodded. “Let’s see what we can find out.”

***

You didn’t know which was more daunting: the actual test itself or waiting for the results.

The test was more like a true test of patience. You basically just had to sit there as Bruce wrote notes and saw things you never could make out from the weird squiggly lines on the monitor. All while he’s doing that, you’re trying not to just break down from being in a lab again. Thankfully, Bucky offered more comfort the best he could. He let you squeeze his non-metal hand, never flinching once no matter how much your nails dig into him. He even tried striking up conversations with you, trying to distract you. He tells you about the new romance movie he thinks you two should go see. You try to stay engaged, feeling a bit bad you couldn’t focus well on it, but he didn’t seem to mind.

When the roles were reversed, Bucky didn’t ask for any help from you. You still tried to offer something by taking his hand in yours. But he just didn’t need distractions, perhaps a bit too familiar with being subjected to testing. This had to be on the easier side, you figured.

Once you both were finished, Bruce instructed you to take a seat and wait. He had some things to double-check. The longer you sat, the more you were worried it was bad news - but you didn’t even really know what bad news would actually entail. What was he looking for? How much of the bond could actually be seen? You hadn’t heard of this ever. If you did, you probably would’ve looked into it a long time ago just to clarify if you were fucked in the head or not.

“How are you feeling?” Bucky asked, gently. You fiddled with your fingers, unsure.

“It wasn’t so bad,” you said. “Just not sure what he’s going to find.” Bucky agreed and you two fell back into your silence as you waited.

Minutes later, Bruce finally re-entered the room. You two must’ve been wearing hopeful looks because he motioned for you to calm down. Bruce wasn’t matching your excitement. Something twisted in your stomach.

“I’ve reviewed your tests,” he said, holding up a folder labeled with your names. You two nodded. Bruce motioned towards you first and said, “Your test came back perfectly normal. Everything is fine with your part of the bond which quite surprised me but I checked and rechecked. The issues aren’t with you-,”

Bucky sighed, cutting Bruce off as he mentally pieced it together. “They’re with me.”

You felt your body tense as Bucky looked defeated beside you. He wasn't meeting either of your gazes despite you trying to reach for his hand again. He shrugged it off, you quickly turned to Bruce.

“What’s the problem?” You just about demanded. Bruce didn’t look very phased by your outburst. He pulled up a seat in front of you two looking like he had to mentally prepare himself for this.

“There’s an unnatural disturbance in Bucky’s side of the bond,” Bruce explained as he flipped open the folder. You didn’t even try to understand the printed results. Bucky was fully disconnected at this point. “I can’t say for sure what caused it, but if I had to guess when he underwent what...Hydra did, it affected lines in the transmission process. They probably thought they were severing the lines but they were really just scrambling them, hence the nightmares. They’re the dominant memories the bond reads in transmission. Bucky’s missions and recent healing process didn’t help anything. All in all, to put it simply, any intense moments Bucky experiences will be projected back to you due to a disconnect in the function of the bond.”

“So, I really was the cause of all this?” Bucky finally spoke up. His voice was hoarse, almost weak. You knew he thought his hair hid the look of distress written on his face but you could feel it. Boy, could you feel it.

You immediately began shaking your head and reaching for him again. He didn’t move under your touch but at least he was allowing it. “This isn’t your fault, I promise.”

Bucky looked like he wanted to protest further but Bruce stopped him, “You couldn’t do anything to prevent this.” He looked back at you. “Either of you. These were the actions of some deranged individuals and they are the only ones responsible. I’m just sorry you two have to pay the price.”

“I-Is there anything we can do to fix it?”

Bruce closed the folder, looking more uncomfortable - if that was even possible. “I’m afraid not. It’s hard enough to damage soulmate bonds, essentially impossible to bandage.”

Upon hearing that, Bucky abruptly stood up. You jumped at the sudden action, suddenly convinced he was going to walk away. Forever. But instead, he made his way over to the window, his back towards you two, lost in whatever self-deprecating thoughts were flooding his brain. You’d address that later but were currently focused on pressing Bruce.

“There’s really nothing at all?” You were sounding desperate at this point but Bruce didn’t seem to mind, giving you the most sympathetic look.

“My best advice would be that Bucky finish his healing treatment and then get him out of this...profession.”

You could feel Bucky’s eyes on you two now. “What, like retirement?”

Bruce shrugged. “Whatever you want to call it. Essentially, the less he fights, the less traumatizing situations he’s put in, the fewer nightmares you’ll have.” He glanced back at the folder. “In theory, you could be rid of them all. Get back to having actual dreams. It’s an optimistic take but you’ve already proven it’s possible to some degree.”

You looked over your shoulder, your worried eyes meeting Bucky’s intense ones. He wasn’t exactly protesting but you saw the hesitancy. You turned back to Bruce.

“Thank you for all your help,” you said.

He nodded. “I’m glad I could be of some assistance. If you ever want to look even further into it, I think I know someone else that could help.”

“I think we’ve learned enough for a while.”

“Of course,” Bruce agreed and then stood from his chair. “I’ll let you two go. Probably got a few things to discuss. Call me if you need anything.” With that, he exited the lab, leaving just you and your soulmate to move forward. Somehow.

Bucky had turned back to the window. You shifted in your seat, unsure of what to say now.

Thankfully, Bucky was the first to speak. “Do you want to get some dinner?”

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olivemac · 3 years

Text

heartbeat | chapter two | b.b.

Summary | When Steve Rogers asks Kate Stark to find the Winter Soldier, she gets too involved.

Notes | Captain America: Civil War re-write, essentially. Starts just after the events of CA: Winter Soldier.

Pairing | Bucky Barnes x fem!oc, Bucky Barnes x Stark!oc

Genre | romance

Rating | explicit

Story Warnings | angst, fluff, romance tropes, so many romance tropes, coarse language, alcohol use, canon-typical violence , smut (m/f), oral sex (f&m receiving), 18+ ONLY

Chapter Warnings | coarse language

master list | AO3 link

_____

prev chapter

_____

Kate is on the next commercial flight to Bucharest. She's worried Bucky will move on before she can get to him, but she knows Tony would never approve of the use of one of his jets to chase down an ex-assassin in hiding. The less he knows, the better. Which is why she told him she was escaping to Europe for a long respite after feeling oh so overwhelmed with her work at Stark Industries.

Tony barely bats an eye when she told him. There were some advantages to being Tony Starks' baby sister. The first being he feels guilty about his ineptness at raising her after their parents' death and would literally let her get away with murder. The second is an almost unlimited bank account left to her by her father and supplemented by Tony's previously mentioned guilt.

Kate Stark was her mother’s mid-life crisis. Maria, three decades younger than her husband, had – at forty-two years old – decided she wanted another baby. Tony, who was eighteen at the time, had balked at the idea. But Howard relented and called in the best team of fertility doctors money could buy, and Kate was born.

She doesn't remember her parents, not really. She was only three when they died, and she doesn't remember that event either. Though she was there, in the car, when it crashed on Long Island.

Tony's only ever spoken to her about it once, after she accused him of hating her for surviving when their parents died. Really, he hated that he survived.

When rescue workers arrived at the scene of the wreck, they found her parents dead in the front seat and her tucked safely into her car seat in the back, bundled up against the December cold. She was an orphan, and Tony, at twenty-one, was suddenly responsible for a toddler.

So, he did the only thing he could think of. He hired a series of nannies to raise her, then sent her off to boarding school as soon as she was old enough, all the while playing genius, billionaire playboy.

He wasn’t surprised when it turned out she was just as smart as him or their father. And it surprised him less when she followed in his footsteps and attended MIT. What did surprise him was when she started hacking government databases for fun. She only agreed to work for him at Stark Industries in exchange for him not sticking Rhodey on her after she released documents regarding the US Air Force‘s involvement in some less that savory overseas dealings.

On the plane, she starts an email to Steve telling him where she was headed and what she had found. Then she deletes it and starts over. Then deletes that. She chews her thumbnail and thinks. If she tells Steve where Bucky is, he'll come blazing in, shield at the ready, and Bucky will.... She doesn’t know what Bucky will do, but she has a feeling the encounter would end with a fight and Bucky running. Which will kill Steve. Again. So, she decides she doesn't need to tell Steve – not right away. She'll see if she can figure out what Bucky remembers – if anything – before telling Steve where he is.

_____

A little over forty-eight hours after her software found Bucky, Kate is assembling IKEA furniture in her new studio apartment in Romania. Getting the landlord to lease her the empty flat next to Bucky's was easy enough when Kate offered him double what he was asking in rent. He was discreet enough to not ask any questions. Most of the people in the building were hiding from something so a young American woman who paid cash upfront wasn't the most unusual thing he'd dealt with.

She makes her bed, unpacks her suitcase, and re-reads the Winter Soldier file. That night she dreams of her parents and the wreck that killed them. In the dream there's always a man outside of the car, but she can never see his face. Her father begs for help: "Help my wife, my daughter. Please. Help."

She wakes up sweating, a scream caught in her throat.

_____

The apartment next to his is no longer empty. Bucky can hear music and soft footsteps through the paper-thin walls. If he focuses his hearing, he can hear a heartbeat other than his own, but he's working to turn off the super soldier reflexes, so he tries to ignore it. He's enjoyed the silence that the empty apartment afforded him, and he hopes the new tenant isn’t as nosy as his neighbor in Kiev who had asked so many questions. He hadn't stayed long after that meeting.

Around two in the morning, he wakes to the sound of a strangled cry from his new neighbor. Bucky sits up straight, suddenly on alert. He listens closely, focusing for the sounds of a struggle, but he only hears the unfamiliar heartbeat. His neighbor was having a nightmare, he imagines. He had plenty of those himself.

Sometimes he was staring down the barrel of a gun, his only intent to kill. Other nightmares took him back to the HYDRA base and their machine that scrambled his thoughts over and over again. And others found him falling from a train, the blonde man from the Triskelion reaching out toward him. He always wakes up just before he hits the icy river he knows awaits him.

Bucky knows now that the blonde man is Steve Rogers. Without HYDRA's influence, he's started to remember more: flashes of Steve and a group called the Howling Commandos during the war, but also flashes of Steve before the war, smaller, shorter. And flashes of a family – his family – a father, a mother, a sister. Rebecca. The name comes to him one afternoon while he's browsing the used bookstore near his flat.

He's started eating plums and jogging to improve his memory. He isn't sure if it's helping, but the memories are becoming longer and more frequent. He sees himself with Steve at Coney Island, riding the Cyclone until Steve lost his lunch and Bucky laughed so hard tears were streaming down his face, and he sees himself flirting with an auburn-haired combat nurse in Italy, following her back to her tent and undressing her slowly.

He wakes the next morning feeling restless. He had slept in fits and starts, listening for any more disturbances from next door. None came.

He dresses and goes for a run, and when he returns, he catches his first glimpse of his new neighbor. She's coming out of her apartment, her face turned downward toward her phone. When he reaches the top of the stairs, she lifts her head and smiles. Bucky is struck by how pretty she is, a thought he hasn't let himself have since leaving HYDRA. He turns away quickly and slams the door to his own apartment. He doesn't need pink lips and dark curls reminding him of what he can never have again. He's too broken for her, or anyone else for that matter.

_____

Bucky has seen his new neighbor more times in five days than he's seen anyone else in the building over the past two months. They always seem to be coming or going at the same time.

The first time he actually speaks to her, she's dropping groceries up the stairs from a rip in her canvas bag.

"Fuck," she mutters as an apple rolls beneath the railing and falls to the landing below.

Bucky has a brief vision of her uttering that same word while his head is buried between her legs, but he shakes if off quickly.

"Let me," he says in English, scooping up some rogue potatoes and taking the bag from her.

"Thanks," she says before unlocking her door and holding it open for him.

Her apartment is the same layout as his – one room, with a tiny bathroom at the front and a small kitchen along the back wall. He sets the bag of groceries on the kitchen counter and steps back.

"I should—"

"Thank you—"

They both speak at the same time. Bucky bows his head and motions for her to continue.

"Thank you for your help." She pauses. "And it's nice to speak English for a change. My Romanian is atrocious," she laughs. "How’d you guess?"

"All the music you listen to is in English," he replies brusquely.

She cringes. "Sorry. I'll turn it down."

"No," he says, "It's fine. Really."

There's an awkward pause as they both stare at each other.

Bucky breaks the silence first. "I should go."

"Right." She leads him to the door. "Thanks."

Bucky nods.

When his own apartment door closes behind him, he sighs and scrubs his right hand over his face. He needs to avoid her. He doesn't need anything to distract him from regaining his memories, and he certainly doesn't need to get close to someone he'll inevitably hurt. He doesn’t even begin let himself entertain the thought that she could be a HYDRA agent waiting to turn him in.

_____

Later that evening, he's startled by a knock at his door. When he peers into the hallway, there's a plate of food on the floor, covered with a cloth and a note. He picks it up.

Thanks for saving my groceries.

- Kate

Bucky considers the possibilities that she is a HYDRA agent and the food is poisoned, but he decides it's unlikely HYDRA would take that approach. If anything, they would want their soldier back, and if they didn't, they wouldn't kill him quickly. Also, he can't remember the last time he had a home-cooked meal – definitely before the war – and he’s starving. Protein bars aren’t really cutting it anymore.

He studies the note as he eats. He runs his fingers over the name written in curling handwriting: Kate, and debates what his next move should be. He needs to ignore her – for her own safety – but his mother raised a gentleman so he should at least thank her for dinner, right?

_____

Kate nearly steps on the plate when she leaves her flat the next morning for a run. It’s sitting right at her doorway, clean, the dish towel she had with it folded with a note peeking out.

Kate,

You’re welcome. Thank you for dinner.

- Bucky

If she knew how long Bucky had agonized over whether to write back, she probably would have cried. Kate definitely would have cried if she knew he had debated whether or not to sign the note “Bucky” or “James.” He’s been using James at any off-the-books odd jobs he can get, but with his memories returning, he’s been feeling more like the Bucky Steve referred to in DC.

_____

Kate makes a potato soup that night and leaves it outside his door sans note. She brings him dinner for a week straight before she asks him to dine with her.

"Come over,” she says the next time they pass in the hall.

"What?" Bucky freezes.

"Come over tonight,” Kate repeats, “for dinner.”

"Why?" He sounds rude. He should really work on that, but she’s caught him in one of his broodier moods after another sleepless night.

"Why not?” she shrugs. “I have wine."

He’s staring at her. He realizes he needs to stop staring at her and answer.

“Okay.”

“Seven thirty?” she suggests.

"Okay," he replies.

"Okay," she laughs.

For a second, Bucky wonders if she's laughing at him, but there's a softness in her eyes that makes him think not. Talking to women used to be easy, he thinks. It took him hours to come up with the simplest response to her note the other night, and now he can't even form a sentence in front of her. He spends the rest of the day worrying he's made a huge mistake in accepting her invitation.

He's not the only one. Kate has half a mind to call it all off, phone Steve, and get on the next plane back to New York. What if he doesn't remember anything? What if he's still the Winter Soldier? She has a brief vision of Bucky snapping and wrapping that metal hand he's been hiding around her throat – and not in a fun way. But when he knocks on her door at seven thirty, she thinks she might actually die from how sweet he looks.

"Hi," she says.

"Hi," he responds, running his tongue over his lips nervously.

They're caught in another awkward moment of just staring at each other when she finally invites him.

The old Bucky would have bought flowers and then made some quip about how the flowers aren't nearly as beautiful as she is, but this Bucky – post-HYDRA Bucky – feels like he's forgotten how to interact with women at all and his tongue has suddenly turned to lead.

Kate's debated how much to reveal about herself. Finally, she decides she'll tell him everything. Well, mostly everything. He doesn't need to know that she's a Stark or friends with Steve Rogers or here on some crazy rescue mission to save the Winter Soldier because maybe, just maybe, she read his file one too many times and got caught up in the look in Steve's eyes when he talked about Bucky. No, he doesn't need to know that.

Kate's also considered how much to ask him about himself. She wants to know what – if anything – he remembers, but she also doesn't want to give herself away by revealing she knows who he really is. And she doubts he’ll tell her outright. The fact that he signed the note Bucky seems like a good indication that his memories are returning, though.

"How long have you been in Bucharest, Bucky?" she asks, plating their dinner.

"Almost two months," he says.

"Here for work?" she asks casually.

"Uh...it's complicated," he says, scratching at the back of his neck. "You?"

She looks up at him. "It's complicated."

They're staring at each other again, and Bucky has to force himself to look away.

"Family?" she asks.

"Also complicated," he says. God, he thinks, he sounds like a jackass. But it's not like he can tell her he's a ninety-eight-year-old ex-assassin in hiding so his family is probably long dead.

She motions for him to sit at her small kitchen table and sets a plate in front of him.

"You're not hiding a wedding ring under those gloves, are you?" she asks, a smirk on her lips. She knows about his arm; she just wants to see what he’ll give away.

He blushes and looks at his hands. Then he realizes he's taking too long to answer, and she probably thinks he's an idiot. "No... uh...no. No," he finally says without elaborating.

Kate can sense he's nervous so she does what Tony would do in a situation like this and just keeps talking. She tells him about Tony – minus the Stark detail. She talks about MIT and New York and the last book she read. He listens closely, laughing softly when she makes jokes and asking questions where appropriate. He likes the way her lips look when they form his name and the way her eyes light up at her own humor.

When they finish eating, Bucky helps her wash dishes. She considers asking him to stay, watch a movie or something, but then she thinks maybe she should take this slowly, not overwhelm him, so she bids him goodnight and closes the door behind him.

Bucky thinks Kate might be the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen. Then he thinks that might be because she’s the first woman he’s interacted with in so long. Either way, he tries not to think of her that night when his body remembers what it's like to be a man.

He decides that staying away from her would be too hard.

On the other side of the wall, she’s thinking of him, too. She hadn't expected his eyes to be so impossibly blue. She had stared at the black and white military photo for hours, but seeing him in person, she was caught in the Arctic waters that made up his eyes.

_____

next chapter

#bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #sergeant barnes #bucky barnes x oc #bucky x oc #bucky barnes x ofc #bucky x ofc #bucky fic #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes romance

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occidentaltourist · 3 years

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The Unbearable Whiteness of (Comics) Beings

An excellent thread by Gene Demby, correspondent and co-host of NPR’s Code Switch podcast, on the deeply embedded whiteness of Marvel and DC comics characters.

From Droll Embiid.@GeeDee215:

A quick thing about Isaiah on The Falcon and The Winter Soldier.

About a decade ago, I interviewed Robert Morales, who invented that character for Marvel in 2001. The result was "Truth: Red, White, And Black" which recast the story of Captain America's origins as part of a Tuskegee Syphillis Study-like plot.

In Robert's story, the US rounded up hundreds of Black GIs in a segregated battalion during WWII to use as guinea pigs. The US is trying to re-create the procedure used to turn Steve Rogers into Cap.

They get it wrong — a lot. Almost all of the Black men they round up die.

Only five of the 300 Black men subjected to the super-soldier experiments survive the process; of that five, Isaiah is the only Black super-soldier who survives the war, and he is thrown in prison for decades.

"It was so depressing I didn't think they would approve it," Robert told me. ""But it was depressingly realistic. And *likely.*

"Robert died in 2013. But his revision of the Cap story was part of a wider on-page reckoning w/ the whiteness of the stories in the mainline MCU/DCU.

The Kents of Smallville, as one example, were reimagined as radical abolitionists — Free-Staters who settled in Kansas to oppose the state from becoming a slave state. Clark Kent, then, would be directly downstream from the principles of his forebears.

It's a very liberal inclination — positioning the Kents on the side of justice for a century-plus before the space-ship landed on their farm.

but it skips over some bigger, more important question about race and power: like how is it that whiteness was literally so universal that both a Kansan *and* a Kryptonian might possess it?

Much more under the cut.

Black mainline comics writers kept playing with these premises. The legendary Dwayne McDuffie, wrote his Black superman analogue Icon as having become Black upon imprinting on the enslaved Black woman in the American south who found and adopted it.*

*why this character was still -male- is...yeah.

anyway, a lot of mainstream superheroes, in their reimaginings, have to nod to the oppression in this country. (There was an aside in one of the Nolan Batman jawns that positioned the Batcave as originally a hideout the Waynes used for fugitives on the Underground Railroad.)

And i think that speaks to how deeply embedded the whiteness of these characters is.

The Green Lantern's power ring had to scan the earth for the bravest person in a world of billions of people and...decided that its rightful bearer was a white fighter pilot from the Midwest?

anyway, more later!

okay, so young Kal-El rocketed across the cosmos as a baby in a spaceship before crash-landing in a field in Kansas. He was Kryptonian but also, somehow, a white boy. Which brings us back to this question upthread: whiteness could literally span the cosmos?

in those Silver Age days, that's literally how they explained it: he could be a white American because there were white Kryptonians.

This was underscored by the fact that they created distinctly *Black* Kryptonians — who lived in a place called Vathlo Island.

Vathlo Island "retained its independence throughout history and did not join the planetary federation, though good relations were maintained."

Kryptonian Wakanda, I guess.(Yes, I know i'm mixing universes to make that metaphor work. calm down, nerds.)

Not long after that first (and one of the only) references to Vathlo Island in 1971, Neal Adams, a white artist at DC, asked his editor a q: what happens if Hal Jordan — the Green Lantern — dies? The editor told him that there would then be a backup Lantern.

The backup Green Lantern they had in mind was a white gym teacher who used to play Big 10 football.

Again: the bravest person in the world was a white USian dude.

Adams eventually pushed back, and along w/ Dennis O'Neil, created a Black character to take over the GL mantle: an ex-Marine named John Stewart.

(Adams told me his editor originally wanted to name the character Lincoln Washington, but he talked him out of it. Phew.)

Again, y'all see the problems here — the bravest person in the world is still a male, a USian and a member of the US, military? — but as representation went, Stewart was better than a lot of the other Black superheroes that DC tried their hands at.

In the 70s, DC created Black Lightning (who was black and electrical), Black Goliath (black and a giant), and Nubia ( black...and Wonder Woman). And at Marvel there was Luke Cage, who, in his earliest pre-dab incarnations, was a jive-talking powerhouse in butterfly collars.

Anyway, the upshot here is that John Stewart taking over the Green Lantern mantle...stuck with Dwayne McDuffie, who created the Milestone comics imprint under DC in the 1990s, featuring all characters of color.

(Milestone's Superman analogue, Icon, mentioned upthread, became a way to embody and critique a certain kind of ascendent respectability politics; he was, after all, essentially a Black cop. Milestone was already playing with chewier ideas around race than mainline DC.)

McDuffie would eventually become a the principal player in the DC Animated Universe. When they were creating the Justice League animated series, underlined that there way that the show could have a team in which everyone — even the aliens Kal-El and Hawkgirl! — were white.so instead of Hal Jordan, the original Green Lantern, taking his traditional place as at the Justice League table , the animated series launched with John Stewart in that role.

The show debuted in 2001 and became a huge hit. McDuffie often pointed out that, as a result, a generation of younger fans who were introduced to the character through the animated series had only ever known a Black Green Lantern.

(There were a lot of reasons the 2011 Ryan Reynolds Green Lantern movie failed, and the "who tf is THIS guy?" factor probably played some role in it.)

There's a lot more, obviously. But some of these IPs — Batman and Superman and Captain America, in particular — are 80+ years old. They're holdovers from a pre-Civil Rights Act America, a pre-Stonewall America, etc. They represent a bunch of stuff that is ever harder to update.

And it will be interesting to watch how that chafes against the the fact that they are more valuable and popular than they've ever been. Could a critique of the premises of the Cap origin story, like Robert Morales', even happen today?

#gene demby #the falcon and the winter soldier #superman #marvel #dc comics

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shinelikethunder · 3 years

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"#'what circumstances exactly' you ask? congrats! now you're asking the right questions#feel free to join the rest of us in arguing endlessly over the answers at essay length because this shit's complicated" i'd love your thoughts!

(re: the tags on this post about suspension of moral disbelief)

I mean, there are plenty of finer details lurking in that “exactly” that I won’t even pretend to have well-formed answers for. But applying the concept of ‘suspension of disbelief’ to morality is just... a thing people do with stories. All the time! The decision to play along with it can be well-judged or ill-judged, just like most other human exchanges of ideas, and the demands a story makes of its audience can be beneficial or pernicious or just plain expedient. All you really need for it to be in play is:

some kind of moral skepticism to suspend (re: consequences, risk, what really matters here, the innate horrificness of a transgression, whatever)

some sufficient incentive to suspend it (catharsis, Feeeeels, wish fulfilment, digging into the appeal of something that’d be a terrible idea IRL, neat thought experiments, compelling trainwrecks, having more important things to Story about...)

some level of confidence that this is a temporary setting-aside of scruples for the duration of your stay in Fictionland, not actual persuasion about something you’ll potentially take with you into real life that demands fuller scrutiny

And there’s no one uncomplicated answer on that for any story. Different people are gonna have different reactions to the same work, on all three points. There are fandoms I just never got into, because the main characters didn’t grab me enough for there to be any incentive to play along with whatever their Standards-Warping Special Snowflake Bullshit was. There are others where I ate that shit up but grumped about it the whole time, because the writing seemed to be huffing its own paint fumes re: narratively vs actually justified. And others where it wasn’t bullshit or grump-worthy at all, because the story knew damn well when it was offering to take you for a ride and when it was in dead earnest and when it was having too much fun to know for sure. (And the last point, about RL persuasion, has a whole stable of sub-essays about intent, responsibility, actual effectiveness at persuading, risk of actually picking up unexamined bullshit vs. sheer annoyance at being sold a load of crap you have no interest in buying... it’s all complicated!)

The “moral suspension of disbelief” mechanism itself, though? It’s a routine part of telling and being told stories. It’s in play every time you don’t give a shit about the widows and orphans and rich inner lives of the redshirts getting killed off. Every time you take satisfaction in watching an obnoxious character meet an outlandishly awful fate they would never have deserved in real life. Every time you root for a protagonist pulling a long-shot heroic stunt that would recklessly endanger everyone around them if the laws of narrative probability weren’t so thoroughly in their favor.

I’m going to haul out Captain America: The Winter Soldier, a movie I love dearly, for examples of both a success and a failure at getting me, personally, to suspend judgement. On pretty much the same highly-morally-charged question of fact--the efficacy of torture, and how it’s portrayed in fiction. The success: I really don’t give a fuck that the movie trotted out a bunch of hoary old chestnuts about torture, brainwashing, and miraculously competent mindfucked double agents to get from Point A to all the tasty layers of identity porn we’re really here for. It’s convenient handwavium presented as Literal Comic Book Science. The traditional fearmongering about inhuman foreign enemies and their magical exotic mind-control techniques is a vaguely-gestured-at red herring; the onscreen horror is homegrown and ugly. The tropes themselves are a crock of shit, and the later movies completely dropped the ball on questions of responsibility and rehabilitation, but zero claims or assumptions about reality are being put forth here, except that The Really Bad Shit Is Coming From Inside The House.

The same can’t be said for Steve, Sam, and Natasha getting from Point A to Point "Obligatory exposition the movie could just as easily have delivered any other way” by... uh... staging a mock execution on a Hydra mole? And doing it as a quick, dirty, totally effective, totally-justified-by-the-Proverbial-Ticking-Clock, nasty-but-efficient way to get 100% accurate information out of someone who has zero incentive to cooperate. All of which is taken so thoroughly for granted that the whole scene, particularly the idea that Steve might consider it unconscionable, is played as a joke. That’s fucking rancid. Doubly rancid for this movie (whose politics are otherwise “what if the real fascism was the national-security state we built along the way”) to be blithely regurgitating the exact same War on Terror propaganda talking points that are still used to "justify” actual, real-life, really fucking recent US war crimes. Triply rancid to have the character who is literally called Captain America, who is supposed to be the country’s idealized conscience in the face of whatever its most topical ongoing failings happen to be, ringleading that shit. Listen, I love this movie, but that scene is straight-up morally indefensible. It skates by on good comic timing juuust long enough for the next big plot point to click into place and divert your attention before you can think too hard about it. But think about it for five seconds and it’s vile.

There was also a weird trend in some of the first waves of fanfiction after CA:TWS came out, which I suspect was the result of a mismatch in moral-disbelief-suspension between that movie and Person of Interest. Overall the tonal, thematic, and subject-matter overlap between the two canons is downright uncanny, but it’s not 100%, and one of the little differences is that the crew of maladjusted weirdoes on Person of Interest are big on “covert surveillance of your friends & loved ones as Actually A Gesture Of Affection.” A number of popular authors who’d written in both fandoms ported that over to CA:TWS fic as an endearing quirk to spice up the character dynamics, and let me tell you, it hit real differently in that universe.

#meta #Anonymous

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fromcrossroadstoking · 4 years

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The Memories That Stay

A ghost story of sorts about Chuck Grant and his not-exactly-alive WW2 soldier best friend.

Taglist: @indigosandviolets @itisjustmethistime @gottapenny

Chuck Grant has been haunted almost all his life. Quite literally.

At the tender age of 6, his parents made the fateful decision to move the family of three from California to Virginia. At a mere six years old, Chuck had very little say in the matter. He held small childish protests about wanting to stay at the beach with his nanny and grampy but, again, at only six, he was very easy to pickup and buckle in to a car seat despite his squirming.

Thankfully, six year olds are very easily distracted from their problems. The long car trip across the country filled with whining and wriggling and begging to get out and run around, was quickly erased from Chuck`s thoughts as he laid his eyes upon his new home.

The house was easily twice as large as his old one and surrounded by a sea of trees. Chuck`s eyes widened in delight - he had never seen so many trees in one place at one time! It was every child`s most wild desire - an entire forest at their fingertips to explore.

The house itself, though large, was nothing to drool over, or at least that`s what young Chuck heard his mom say. The house was old and rather run down looking inside and out. It needed work. A lot of it. Not that that was anything Chuck cared about; oh no, he had a thousand new places to explore and his small heart beat fast with excitement.

Chuck made his first new friend within a couple of days. As his parents cleaned and unpacked and did whatever else it is that grownups did when moving in to a new old house, Chuck played with his little green army men in the backyard. Chuck had been playing for a while when he decided it was time for the paratroopers to be deployed. He scooped them up in his hands and made loud airplane sounds as he swooped over the enemy camp and dropped the paratroopers upon them.

"There`s a tear in that one`s chute. Ain`t gonna survive with a tear in the chute."

Chuck`s head swiveled to face the direction of the unfamiliar voice. A man stood at the edge of the woods, just feet from him, dressed almost like one of his army men.

"What?" Now Chuck had been lectured about stranger danger and how he should never, ever talk to people he didn`t know but... well, the strange man had piqued Chuck`s interest with his comment.

"The paratrooper you just dropped. He`s got a tear in his chute. Ain`t gonna survive the jump like that 'cause the chute won`t work right."

Chuck scrunched up his face as he considered the man`s words and then turned to examine the chute of the recently deployed soldier. Lo and behold, there was indeed a tear in the parachute. This, of course, would not do. Before running off to demand his father fix it so that the mission could be completed, he turned back towards the nameless man to thank him (he was raised with manners after all).

The man was nowhere in sight.

A few days later the man appeared again. This time, however, it was in Chuck`s room and not the backyard which was odd because Chuck had not heard anyone come in.

"You fix the chute?"

Chuck stared at the stranger for a moment. His mother had just given him a fresh stranger danger lecture yesterday since they were now living in a new place and she felt he might need a reminder. But this man couldn`t be a stranger, could he? After all, if he was in the house, his parents must have let him in.

"Dad did."

"Good. You complete the mission?"

"Yeah."

The stranger smiled at him like he approved. And then he vanished. Which was another odd thing because Chuck had never seen someone vanish like that before. Somewhere in his six year old mind he chalked it up to magic, because as any child will tell you, magic is a very real thing, and went back to playing with his matchbox cars.

The odd man didn`t appear again until Saturday. Chuck knew it was Saturday because his favorite Saturday morning cartoons were on. He was parked on the floor in front of the television, eyes fixated on the bright colors of the screen as he shoveled a spoonful of extra sugary cereal in his mouth. As one character tricked another in to running off a cliff, Chuck heard a soft chuckle behind him. Turning to look, he found the magic vanishing man sitting on the couch.

"You like cartoons?"

"Guess I do. Never really watched them before."

He really was a very odd man.

Chuck launched in to a detailed explanation of the current show to let his new friend in on what he was missing. The man listened patiently as Chuck went on in the meandering, rambling way that children do when given the freedom to talk about something they`re enthusiastic about.

"Chuck, sweetie, who are you talking to?"

Chuck looked over at his mother, who stood in the living room doorway with a questioning look on her face.

"My friend!" Chuck pointed to a spot on the couch.

"Your friend? And what`s your friend`s name?"

Chuck paused a moment as he realized that he did not in fact know his new friend`s name. He looked at the man and questioned, "What`s your name?"

"Skinny."

Turning back to his mom, Chuck matter-of-factedly announced that his friend`s name was Skinny.

"Skinny?", his mom gave him a amused smile, "That`s a bit of an odd name, isn`t it?"

"That`s not nice, mom! You`re only 'sposed to say stuff when it`s nice stuff!"

"You`re right, hunny. I`m sorry. I`m going to go finish up the laundry. You and your friend have fun watching cartoons, okay?"

Skinny became a mainstay in the Grant household after that. Chuck`s parents figured this new imaginary friend was a result of the lack of other children (the new house was rather in the middle of nowhere) and a child`s overactive imagination. Chuck, for his part, was rather annoyed that his parents apparently couldn`t see his very real friend.

At age 8 he had even tried to explain to his parents that Skinny wasn`t imaginary, but in fact, a ghost (which was something that Skinny had carefully explained to him just a year ago). They hadn`t seemed to quite buy that.

It wasn`t until Chuck started getting older that his parents started worrying about the fact that his imaginary friend wasn`t disappearing. They began questioning him about his "friend" and Chuck didn`t like that too much. And Chuck especially didn`t like when they sent him to talk to someone about his friend. The office had been stuffy and the man had been old and had talked to him like he was some kind of baby - Chuck was ten at this point and didn`t care for that at all.

So Chuck smartened up. He stopped talking about Skinny to other people. He kept his voice low when he and Skinny were talking. Often he would take a walk in the woods, Skinny by his side, so that they could hold conversations without fear of being overhead. Sometimes he would scribble his side of the conversation in the margins of his notes or drawings, discreetly angling the paper so that Skinny could read it.

Chuck got very good at keeping Skinny secret.

It was in middle school, just a year or so later, that Chuck began asking Skinny more serious questions.

As a child, he would ask Skinny things like "Are there dinosaurs in heaven?" (Chuck hadn`t been sure he wanted to go to a heaven without dinosaurs in it.) He had even asked Skinny once if God really did care if you picked your nose like Chuck`s mom had said. Skinny didn`t have answer to that but assured Chuck that it was gross and he was better off using a tissue like everyone else.

Now the questions shifted to things like;

"You were in the Army?" - "Yep. 101st Airborne. 506th. Easy Company."

"Were you ever in combat?" - "I was. Fought in World War 2."

"Did you kill people?" - "Yes."

"Where do you go when you`re not here?" - "Don`t know. Don`t remember where I`ve been once I reappear."

"Why are you a ghost?" - "Don`t know that either."

"How did you die?"

When Chuck asked Skinny how he died, there was a long silence like Skinny was carefully chewing over his words before speaking. And once he did start speaking, it took him awhile to get through the story. He kept pausing, rubbing his hands together, shifting in his spot atop the fallen log he occupied.

"Well, you see, we were in this place. Hagenau. Ugly, cold place. It was better than where we were though. Bastogne, that`s where we had just been, you know? That was frozen over hell. Anything was better than that. Hagenau - we at least had roofs over our heads and beds to sleep in. We even got showers. Food was still awful, but at least we had some. And, well. You see... in Hagenau we had to run this patrol, right? And Shifty, my best friend, you remember me telling you about him? Well, Shifty was supposed to go on it. But he was feeling really bad. He was real sick. It was all that cold, you know? So, Shifty was supposed to go and he was feeling real bad, so I told him I`d take his place. Winters was okay with it. So I took his place. Well, on the patrol... on the patrol we had to go in this house. And. And I was lead. And Jackson, this real young kid, he was right on top of me. Could almost feel his breath on the back of my neck. And Jackson, well, he threw this grenade in the house right as I`m about to go in. Got a face full of grenade. And I survived. They got me back to the house we were staying at. I remember that. I don`t remember much, `cause of the pain, but I remember that. I remember Doc Roe, remember his hands, remember him telling me 'Alright now, Skinny. I got you. It`s alright.' And then that`s it. Don`t remember anything after that. I was just suddenly in my childhood home again. So here I am."

The next day at school, Chuck goes to the library to use the school computers there. He tries his hardest to look up Skinny, his unit, anything. There isn`t much out there, just some scant information and half illegible old Army records. But then he finds the one thing he didn`t expect - a book specifically about Skinny`s company. He writes down the book title and the author`s name on a scrap of paper he has with him. The middle school library doesn`t have the book, but he`s sure he can get his dad to take him to the town library next weekend.

It`s at the library that Chuck hits the proverbial jackpot. Not only does he find the book he`s looking for, but there are books by other men who served in Easy Company too. There`s even a book about Shifty, Skinny`s best friend.

Chuck checks them all out.

Skinny`s reaction is not quite what Chuck expected. He eyes the books with interest but remains quite, says nothing. Chuck expected at least some excitement, a little gratitude at least.

But at Chuck`s offer to read him the books out loud, Skinny merely declines with a slight shake of his head before dissolving away.

It would be several days before Chuck sees Skinny again. Chuck, although only twelve at the time, instinctively understands that the war is a topic that Skinny would rather avoid and so he avoids it too.

The books are returned to the library, unread.

Chuck leaves the topic well enough alone until his junior year of high school. He takes an AP US History class and his teacher happens to be rather fixated on the topic of World War 2. Chuck has never been so interested in a class before. He listens with rapt attention, delves whole-heartedly in to the readings, and even chooses to do his final paper on the Battle of the Bulge.

He carefully keeps this all away from Skinny, of course. Although, the more Chuck learns, the greater the itch is to ask Skinny questions. But Skinny has been his best friend for almost eleven years now and Chuck knows the topic is painful, so he bites his tongue.

Skinny notices of course. He notices the history books that Chuck hides away in his backpack. He notices the internet tabs opened to sites on World War 2 that are hurriedly closed when Skinny appears. He notices how Chuck practically doubles himself over papers that he`s working on, as if to hide the assignments from Skinny. Skinny might be a ghost, but he`s not dumb.

It`s winter break of Chuck`s senior year of high school when Skinny asks Chuck to sit down with him for a long overdue conversation. Chuck`s parents are away at some conference or other and it`s just Chuck and Skinny alone in the house. The wind howls outside as a blizzard blows through -the world beyond the four walls of the house is barely visible thanks to the whirlwind of white. Chuck can tell the weather unsettles Skinny in some way. It always does.

There is a long stretch of silence after they take their seats - Chuck curled under a blanket on the sofa, Skinny sitting in the recliner across from him, leg bouncing a million miles per hour. Chuck lets the quiet goes on for as long as it has to. Skinny will talk when he`s ready. Chuck need only be patient.

And when Skinny finally breaks the silence that has been dragging on for a handful of minutes and begins his story, Chuck sits stock still and listens intently. He knows better than to interrupt.

When Skinny finishes telling Chuck everything - why he joined the paratroopers, the training at Toccoa, the friends he made, the friends he lost, the terror of war, what it felt like to take another`s life - Skinny seems different somehow. Lighter. Relieved almost.

But still. Chuck`s gut says there`s something else. Perhaps it`s the way Skinny`s face scrunches or the quick flash of... worry? guilt?... that passes over Skinny`s face. But Chuck knows better than to push.

Skinny will talk when he`s ready.

Skinny is perched on the desk in Chuck`s room as Chuck packs. Chuck can tell Skinny is anxious from the way he chews on his bottom lip. Truth be told, Chuck is a bit anxious too. Well. Perhaps more than a bit anxious.

When they had moved in oh so many years ago, the house had stood abandoned (except for a handful of squatters here and there) since the early fifties. Skinny`s family had been the last ones to properly live there. Except, of course, for Skinny. Although Chuck wasn`t sure the word "living" could be applied to Skinny`s situation.

Skinny had been alone for decades before the the Grants moved in. And now here Chuck was, the only person of their little family who could see Skinny, packing to go away to college.

The plan was for Skinny to attempt to follow Chuck. In the beginning it had seemed that Skinny was restricted to the house and surrounding property. But over the years, Skinny slowly gained the ability to follow Chuck places and would pop up at school (test days were a lot easier when you had a ghost whispering you the answers), weddings (much less boring with a ghost friend in tow), and even a funeral (admittedly a bit of an awkward thing to attend with a ghost). The thing was despite accompanying him on hikes and grocery trips and ice cream runs, Skinny had never been able to follow Chuck more than a few counties over. And the college that Chuck was attending was definitely more than a few counties over.

The thought of Skinny not being able to follow him, of having to leave Skinny alone, made Chuck`s chest tighten with worry and even a bit of guilt. He crossed his fingers that his theory proved accurate - as time went on Skinny was becoming more attached to Chuck than to the house (which would be an unsettling theory if the ghost was anyone but Skinny). It had been a couple of years since Chuck had gone beyond Skinny`s boundaries. This would be the ultimate test.

Chuck held his breath the day he moved in to the dorms. He was waiting for some sign of Skinny. The hours wore on - he unpacked, met his roommate, walked the campus with his parents, and even had dinner with them. Still no Skinny. Chuck could feel his heart sinking as the sun began to go down. His stomach twisted at the thought of how Skinny would be all alone again, save for the times Chuck visited home.

His roommate dragged him out to a party later that night. Chuck wasn`t all too fond of his roommate or the party but he went anyway. What else is a kid supposed to do during his first night at college?

The next morning - mid morning really - Chuck woke up to discover his roommate (John? Jake?) was already long gone. Groaning, he buried his face in his pillow. Yep, he had definitely had too much to drink if the hammering in his head was any indication.

"Already having too much fun? Come on now, Chuck. I can`t even leave you for a day anymore."

Chuck`s head whipped up, far too fast for the likes of the throbbing in his skull, at the sound of the familiar teasing voice.

Skinny had made it.

Chuck had been right it turns out - Skinny had slowly become more attached to him than to the house over the years. And during Chuck`s freshman year of college, the two of them take full advantage of this fact.

Skinny tags along to amusement parks and museums and bars and parties. He follows Chuck to the library and to football games and hockey games and baseball games. At Skinny`s request, Chuck even goes to the zoo and the aquarium - Skinny always wanted to see penguins and tigers.

Freshman year and the subsequent summer are non stop adventures for the duo. They were constantly heading one place or another, sometimes with other people in tow, sometimes just the two of them.

Skinny does more in that one year than he had in the several decades preceding.

That summer, Chuck decides to get an apartment instead of moving back in to the dorms. Of course, Chuck knows that he`ll need to get a roommate in order to swing rent, so he looks on the college`s "Roommates Wanted" Facebook page. And that is where he meets Floyd Talbert.

"What if he`s crazy?"

"He`s not."

"You don`t know that."

"Well, I talk to a ghost so if either of us is crazy, it`s probably me."

Turns out Floyd prefers to be called Tab. Also, turns out that he and Chuck make fast friends.

They meet a couple times that summer before officially agreeing to become roommates. After grabbing lunch for the second time, Chuck decides Tab seems like an okay guy. Skinny, thankfully, agrees.

As sophomore year gets under way and the months start to turn cooler, Chuck wrestles with a very important decision. In just a few short months, Tab had quickly become one of the closest friends Chuck had ever had (the other being Skinny). And with Skinny being such an important part of Chuck`s life, it began feeling odd to leave Tab in the dark.

But... how exactly do you go about telling your new best friend that you`ve been haunted by the ghost of a WW2 paratrooper since you were six? And that said paratrooper was your absolute best friend? And that said paratrooper was also currently a third, albeit invisible, roommate in the tiny apartment that you and your actually alive friend share?

Chuck could already tell it was going to be an awkward conversation.

"Wait. You`re actually serious?"

"Yeah, I am."

"So you`re telling me, very seriously, that the ghost of some dude who died in World War 2 has been haunting you since you were a little kid? And he`s now like, attached to you? And that doesn't hit you as creepy? At all?"

"Well, to be fair, I did move in to his childhood bedroom. He was sorta there first. And Skinny`s not creepy. If you could just meet him, you`d-"

"But I can`t. Because he`s dead."

"Yeah."

An awkward silence stretched between them before Tab finally spoke again.

"Prove it."

"What?"

"If you don`t want me to think you`re crazy, prove there`s a ghost here. Have him... I don`t know... open the cabinets, slam doors, stack chairs, you know - go full poltergeist."

"Uhh.." Chuck hesitated. Skinny could do exactly none of those things. Hell, it had taken the better part of several years just to get Skinny to the point where he could move a lightweight cup the incredibly impressive distance of an inch.

"Hold on." Chuck went to the cupboard and pulled out the lightest cup he could find - a neon orange plastic thing with the name of a bar and a handful of scantily clad women printed on it. Setting it down on the counter between him and Tab, he took a step back.

"Skinny, can you move the cup please?"

Chuck watched the corners of Skinny`s mouth turn down ever so slightly as he stepped forward.

"I`ll do my best, kid."

There is nothing but silence in the room as a small eternity passes before the cup begins to move. Slowly, slowly, it creeps to the left just about an inch. Chuck lets out a small breath of relief that Skinny was able to do it.

"That`s it?"

Chuck throws a glare at the fully unimpressed Tab, "It`s not like the movies, okay? It took him a long time just to learn how to do that!"

"Alright, fine. He really can`t do anything else?"

"No, he-" And that`s when Chuck has a brilliant idea.

"Okay, how about this? Write something on a piece of paper and hold it so that someone reading over your shoulder can read it. Skinny`ll tell me what it says."

"Okay," Tab shrugs, obviously still not fully buying the whole Chuck-has-a-ghost-friend deal. Still, he grabs a pen and paper and does as instructed.

"This is fucking stupid."

"I know, Skinny. But can you just tell me what it says?"

"That`s what it says: This is fucking stupid."

Chuck snorts and repeats the phrase. He doesn`t miss the quick flash of surprise on Tab`s face. And then the games begin.

Tab has Chuck wear a blindfold. Chuck still gets the words correct.

Tab has Chuck sit in another room. Chuck gets the words correct again.

Tab has Chuck sit in another room while blindfolded. Chuck is correct yet again.

Eventually, Tab admits defeat.

"Alright, so there`s a ghost named, of all things, Skinny, here."

"Well, his name`s technically Wayne but he prefers to be called Skinny."

"Right. Well, please tell Skinny that I say hi and that it`s nice to meet him. Well, sort of meet him."

"Please tell Tab that I`m dead, not deaf. I can hear his loudmouth just fine."

It`s a bit of a relief now that Tab knows about Skinny. Chuck doesn`t have to keep such a large secret from Tab anymore and he can even talk to Skinny out loud now when Tab is home.

It proves to be a bit of an adjustment on Tab`s part but he eventually gets the hang of deciphering when Chuck is talking to him and when Chuck is talking to Skinny. He even gets used to talking to Skinny through Chuck. Too used to it, one might say.

"Hey, Skinny, can you walk through walls?"

There`s a beat before Chuck replies with Skinny`s answer, "Yes."

"Skinny, was there like a white light when you died?"

Again, another beat before Chuck repeats Skinny`s answer for the non-ghost-vision-inclined, "Not that I remember, sorry."

"Hey, Skinny, what`s jumping out of a plane like?"

"Hey, did you have Cheerios in the 1940s?"

"Skinny, did you have tv as a kid?"

"Did you eat pizza in the 40s? Did they deliver?"

"What`s your favorite decade so far?"

"What do you miss the most about being alive?"

"What`s the best part about being a ghost?"

"Are you ever offended by scary ghost stereotypes? What about when people wear sheets and pretend to be ghosts?"

"Have you ever met another ghost?"

Tab`s questions were un-ending from the moment he accepted Skinny`s existence as a fact. Chuck occasionally considered smothering Tab with a pillow just to get a break from his ghost interpreter job for five damn minutes.

It`s a bright and cold winter morning when Tab asks what turns out to be a very important question, "Are any of your soldier buddies still alive?"

"I don`t know."

"He doesn`t know," Chuck relays the answer to Tab.

"Do you want to know?"

Skinny is quiet for a long moment.

"I don`t know."

Tab`s the one who finds out about the living members of Easy. There aren`t many - just a handful left - and only one that`s close by.

"You`re stalker skills are... concerning."

"Research skills. And they weren`t that hard to find."

Skinny is off doing whatever it is ghosts do when they aren`t visible, so it`s just Tab and Chuck holed up in the university library doing homework. Well, Chuck is doing homework. Tab is apparently tracking down WW2 veterans.

"Whatever you say. Don`t know why you`re so dead set on this. We don`t even know if Skinny will even want to see any of them."

"Well, his soul has to be hanging around for a reason, right? Maybe he needs closure. And then he can move on, you know, in to the white light and all that jazz."

Chuck makes a soft mmm sound in the back of his throat as he turns back to his chemistry textbook.

"You do want him to move on, don`t you?"

Chuck doesn`t respond because he doesn`t know the answer. Sure, Skinny has been around long enough. He deserves to move on. But...

That night as Chuck is laying in bed, trying to fall asleep, he`s plagued by memories -

He`s just a kid, legs barely long enough to reach the pedals of his bike. His parents told him to wait, told him he wasn`t tall enough for the big kid bike yet, wasn`t ready to ride a bike without training wheels. It`s a hot summer day, sweat glues his shirt to him, as he gets up after falling from the bike yet again. Skinny is there. Encouraging him, giving him tips, telling him he can do it if he just tries one more time. Chuck goes home that night, just as the sun is going down, with scraped up knees and a new found ability to ride a big kid bike.

He`s eight years old and his parents are fighting. It`s loud and angry and scary and unlike any fight Chuck has ever heard before. Skinny convinces Chuck to sneak outside. It`s pouring out but Skinny swears worm hunting is best when it`s pouring buckets. Skinny talks the entire time - non stop and loudly - it`s very unlike Skinny. But between the rain crashing down and Skinny`s incessant chatter, Chuck can`t hear a word of his parents' shouting.

It`s ninth grade and Chuck is struggling to remember the answer to number ten on his science test. He`s already answered everything else on the test and he knows that this last answer is buried somewhere in his brain, if only he could just drag it to the surface. His face is crinkled in frustration and he chews at his bottom lip. Skinny quietly steps in and gently prods him towards the right answer. When Chuck gets the graded test back, there`s a bright red "A" on top.

Chuck crashes his car during his senior year of high school. Chuck is fine, the car not so much. The little junker car Chuck had worked so hard to save up for is totaled and Chuck takes the loss hard. Skinny stays up all night long with Chuck that night. He tells Chuck jokes and funny stories. He even tells Chuck about the time he got caught on the train tracks with a girl and his response to Sobel when questioned about it - “The train was coming, she was coming, and so was I.” Chuck cracked a smile for the first time that day.

The next morning, Chuck has officially made up his mind. As much as he doesn`t want Skinny to go, as much as he doesn`t want to risk losing his best friend, Skinny has more than earned the right to find some peace.

It`s just the two of them at the breakfast table. Tab, who doesn`t get up before 10 am unless there is an emergency, is still sound asleep. It`s the perfect opportunity for a long overdue talk.

"Hey Skinny?"

"Yeah?"

"You know, we, uh, did some research, and some of your old company is still alive."

Skinny looks at him curiously and says nothing.

"Winters is alive. And Malarkey. Guarnere and Heffron too. And, uh," Chuck hesitates because he knows the weight of the next name, it`s the weight of a best friend left behind, the weight of someone he died in place of, "Shifty`s alive too. Not far from here. Less than an hour, actually."

The look on Skinny`s face is one that Chuck can`t name and Chuck can`t help but worry that he made the wrong decision in telling him about Shifty as Skinny slowly fades from view.

Chuck doesn`t see Skinny again until the next day. He simply appears from thin air next to Chuck during his morning lecture.

"I want to see Shifty."

Chuck nods and Skinny disappears again.

The day that they pile in to Tab`s car and drive the 45 minutes to the Powers residence, there isn`t a plan really.

The car is packed with tension filled silence as they finally pull up in front of Shifty`s house. It`s a modest but inviting looking home on an unpaved back road. The neighborhood consists of more trees than houses, making their presence conspicuous.

The three of them sit quietly in the car, gazing at the house, unsure of what to do next. The silence only seems to grow thicker before Skinny finally speaks up.

"Can I... can we... go talk to him?"

"Yeah, okay."

Chuck isn`t sure how this is going to work exactly. Knocking on some elderly man`s door and telling him his best friend who died decades ago is currently a ghost that would like to speak to him, isn`t your standard conversation. But he owes it to Skinny to try. So he slowly gets out of the car and makes his way to the house, Tab and Skinny in tow.

The bundle of nerves in Chuck`s stomach threatens to swallow him whole as he knocks on the door. An older man wearing a button down shirt and tidy tan slacks, who Chuck assumes can only be Shifty, answers the door.

"May I help you?" The man`s voice is surprisingly soft. Far from the grizzled harsh voice of a veteran that Chuck was expecting.

"Uh, yes sir. My name is Chuck, Chuck Grant, and this is my friend, Floyd Talbert. We`re here because, well, I moved in to the childhood home of your friend, Skinny, and turns out he was still there. His spirit, I mean, and-"

A dark look crosses the older man`s face, "Now, I don`t have time for these kind of jokes. They ain`t very funny." He begins to close the door and Chuck puts his hand out to stop him.

"Please sir," Chuck shoots a desperate looking at Skinny, quietly pleading for some direction.

"Say... say 'remember when we stole Dike`s chocolate ration and gave it to Doc 'cause he was looking real bad'!"

Chuck hurriedly repeats the words to Shifty, whose mouth drops open a little as he hears what Chuck is saying.

"Now, who told you about that? Skinny and I were the only ones who knew where we got that chocolate from."

"I`m telling you sir, Skinny is here. His ghost is. Right here, on your porch, next to me."

"Tell him 'I never did get to take your sister out dancing'.'"

As Chuck repeats after Skinny, he can see something click behind Shifty`s eyes. Maybe it`s the words he says or maybe it`s the desperate, pleading look on Chuck`s face or maybe it`s both of those things combined, Chuck doesn`t know, but Shifty seems to soften.

"You ain`t lyin', are you?." And with that, Shifty invites them inside.

"Skinny used to joke that when we got home, he was goin' to take my sister out dancin' and she`d fall in love with him and he was goin' to be my brother-in-law." Shifty smiles fondly at the memory as he recalls it.

They`re all sitting in Shifty`s living room now, cups of coffee in hand.

It`s awkward at first but it seems that Skinny and Shifty easily fall back in to their old banter despite the odd barrier of one of them being technically dead and having to speak through a third party.

Track of time is easily lost that day. Stories and jokes and memories are exchanged without end. In a way, Skinny feels more alive than he has in a very, very long time.

The sun is just disappearing beyond the horizon when Skinny says something that he`s wanted to say for decades. He carefully tells Chuck the exact words to say.

"Skinny says he doesn`t regret it, the patrol. He doesn`t regret going on that patrol for a second. He needs you to know that because he knows how you are, how you`ve probably felt guilty about that this whole time. He says he doesn`t want you to feel guilty. He`s never blamed you and he doesn`t want you blaming yourself. He`d take your place on that patrol even if he knew what was going to happen."

There`s quiet after Chuck finishes speaking. There are tears glistening in Shifty`s eyes and they began to roll down his cheeks as he shoulders began to softly shake.

"Thank you, Skinny."

An hour or so later, when they finally begin to leave, Shifty presses something in to Chuck`s hand.

Chuck looks down at what Shifty has given him. It`s an old photograph of a young paratrooper, a giant grin splashed across his face. He recognizes Skinny immediately.

"Shifty, I can`t-"

"Hush now. I want you to have it. You`ve done more for me today than I can ever explain."

Shifty shakes Chuck`s hand with an unexpected amount of strength and something in Chuck`s gut tells him this is the last time he`ll ever speak to Shifty.

The ride home is quiet but unlike the tension filled silence of the ride to Shifty`s house, this quiet is a peaceful one. A weight has been lifted and everyone in the car, especially Skinny and Chuck, can feel it.

Chuck is out like a light almost as soon as he walks through the door of their apartment. Being the go between for the living and the dead is a surprisingly exhausting job.

Skinny quietly watches Chuck sleep - Chuck, who he has watched grow up, who has become like Skinny`s own flesh and blood. He smiles softly, grateful for the second chance at family that he received, so long after his own family had died out.

He can feel something like a light tugging sensation and he knows it`s time. Some part of him understands that he`s free to move on now, to leave this world behind finally, and move on to the next.

Chuck is out cold and Skinny has no desire to wake him. There is no need for this to be any harder than it has to be.

"Love you, kid. Be good." Chuck can hear him, at least some part of him can. Skinny knows it.

When Chuck wakes up the next morning, he knows almost immediately that Skinny is gone. There is an emptiness that Chuck has never felt until now. Before, even when Skinny disappeared from sight, it was like Chuck could feel his presence - it was a warm, familiar thing. But this morning, there is nothing. Nothing but the faint impression of a goodbye residing in his mind like a fuzzy, worn out photo.

There`s an article in the local newspaper a few days later - WW2 Vet, "Shifty Powers", Passed Away. It`s not a headline most people would smile at. But Chuck does.

Shifty and Skinny will finally get to see each other face to face again.

Shifty`s funeral is a large affair. Beloved by the entire community, he is mourned by entire crowds of people.

Chuck is the only one to feel the loss of Skinny.

It`s an odd thing to be the only one mourning the loss of someone - to be the only one to know that someone was even gone. Sure, there was Tab, but he had never really "met" Skinny - he had only ever interacted with him through Chuck.

No, the loss of Skinny was Chuck`s loss to bear alone.

It`s been months now since Skinny moved on. Chuck still feels the pang of loss, although the pain becomes less sharp as each day passes.

Sophomore year is almost over now and Chuck takes a seat at his desk to get started on his final paper for the creative writing elective he signed up for. The final paper is supposed to be an original story and the professor has given them free reign to write on any topic they want.

Chuck has decided to write a ghost story, of sorts - a ghost story about someone, barely out of their teen years, who loses his life fighting a war an ocean away, and takes a dirt-covered little kid under his wing decades later. The words come easy, flowing almost effortlessly, as he writes. He pours every little bit of love, of sadness, of grief, he has into the paragraphs. In many ways, what he writes is a memorial to his dear lost friend.

Watching over Chuck`s progress from atop the bookshelf behind him, is a black and white photograph of a smiling young paratrooper, now housed in a simple black frame, a little green Army man with a patched up parachute standing guard next to it.

#band of brothers #band of brothers fanfiction #chuck grant #skinny sisk #floyd talbert #shifty powers #i wrote a thing

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callunavulgari · 3 years

Text

Scrapbook 2021 | Part I

For anyone that’s new to this, this is how I keep track of all of the things I enjoy and/or create throughout the year. I have literally been doing this since I had a livejournal. I think the first one was 2011? Maybe? In which case, woohoo, ten years of scrapbooking!

It’s a nice little snippet of my life and helps to organize my brain.

A reminder:

Normal font - Indifferent/Neutral Italicized font - Enjoyed bold font - Loved with an asterisk* - All time favorite (bracketed titles) - Re-watches/Re-reads strikethough - Disliked

Goals are: read 80 books, finish five video games, write more than 20 fics or something larger than 20k, and write either an original short story or start a novel.

Past Years

MOVIES

January

(Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring)

(Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers)

(Lord of the Rings: Return of the King)

Robin Hood

(Hook)

Wolfwalkers

February

(Age of Ultron)

From Up On Poppy Hill

(Tangled)

(Onward)

(The Mummy)

(Hercules)

(Promare)

March

Raya and the Last Dragon

(My Neighbor Totoro)

April

(Hunchback of Notre Dame)

(Tarzan)

(Beauty and the Beast)

Weathering With You

BOOKS

January

A Deadly Education | Naomi Novak [Fin]

Home Body | Rupi Kaur [Fin]

The Sunken Mall | K.D. Edwards [Fin]

Bloom | Kevin Panetta [Fin]

The Angel of Crows | Katherine Addison

All the Stars and Teeth | Adalyn Grace [Fin]

The Adventure Zone: Vol 1 | McElroys & Carey Pietsch [Fin]

I Hope You Stay | Courtney Peppernell [Fin]

Pillow Thoughts | Courtney Peppernell [Fin]

Piraneesi | Susanna Clarke [Fin]

The Ex Talk | Rachel Lynn Solomon [Fin]

February

The Adventure Zone: Vol 2 | McElroys & Carey Pietsch [Fin]

The Adventure Zone: Vol 3 | McElroys & Carey Pietsch [Fin]

The Angel of Crows | Katherine Addison

Alice Isn’t Dead | Joseph Fink

March

Winter’s Orbit | Everina Maxwell [Fin]

Fireheart Tiger | Aliette de Bodard [Fin]

Alice Isn’t Dead | Joseph Fink

Fire | Kristin Cashore [Fin]

Bitterblue | Kristin Cashore [Fin]

The Witch’s Heart | Genevieve Gornichec [Fin]

Winterkeep | Kristin Cashore

April

Alice Isn’t Dead | Joseph Fink [Fin]

Winterkeep | Kristin Cashore [Fin]

The Memory Theater | Karin Tidbeck [Fin]

These Violent Delights | Chloe Gong

(Red White and Royal Blue | Casey Mcquiston) [Fin]

Rule of Wolves | Leigh Bardugo [Fin]

Alice Isn’t Dead | Joseph Fink [Fin]

Not the Girl You Marry | Andie Christopher [Fin]

The Echo Wife | Sarah Gailey [Fin]

The Midnight Library | Matt Haig

Catherine House | Elisabeth Thomas [Fin]

Séance Tea Party | Reimena Yee [Fin]

Lumberjanes vol 1 | Noelle Stevenson [Fin]

PODCASTS

January

The Unseen, Christmas and New Year Special

The Penumbra Podcast, Juno Steel arc, Heart of It All and What Lies Beyond

The Penumbra Podcast, Second Citadel, Strong Arm of Justice and The Priestess’ Fortune

I Am In Eskew, Episode 16

Welcome to Night Vale, Episode 67, 68, and 69

The Magnus Archives, Episode 190 and 191

February

The Magnus Archives, Episode 192-194

The Adventure Zone, Episodes 15-60

March

The Magnus Archives, Episode 194-200 [Fin]

The Adventure Zone, Episodes 60-TAZ BALANCE ENDING

MBMBAM, Episode 1

I Am In Eskew, Episode 17-22

April

I Am In Eskew, Episode 23-END

Alice Isn’t Dead, Episode 18-END

TV SHOWS BY SEASON

January

His Dark Materials, s2 [Fin]

Watcher Entertainment

Buzzfeed Worth It

(Black Sails, s1)

The Queen’s Gambit**

February

Cherry Magic

Wandavision, s1

Watcher Entertainment

The Owl House

(Little Witch Academia)

Star vs the Forces of Evil, s3, s4

Bridgerton

Buzzfeed Unsolved: True Crime

Heaven’s Official Blessing

March

Wandavision, s1 [Fin]

Watcher Entertainment, Puppet History & Watcher Weekly

Falcon and the Winter Soldier

Word of Honor

April

Word of Honor, s1

Watcher Entertainment, Puppet History

Falcon and the Winter Soldier, s1

Kim’s Convenience, s1, 2, 3, 4

Leverage, s4

Shadow and Bone, s1

The Great, s1

VIDEO GAMES

January

Hades, 37 hours [Fin]

Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla, 35 hours

February

Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla, 35 hours

Hades, 75+ hours?

Animal Crossing: New Horizons, 16 hours

Persona 5 Royal

March

Animal Crossing: New Horizons, 45 hours

Persona 5 Royal, 141 hours

Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla, 35 hours

Concrete Genie, 3 hours

April

Concrete Genie, 6 hours [Fin]

Animal Crossing: New Horizons, 65 hours

Persona 5 Royal, 160 hours

Monster Hunter Rise, 2 hours

Civ, 5 hours

DELIGHTFUL FIC

January

Modern Rustic by beethechange | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 22k | “I think,” he says, finally, “that if we looked around this place hard enough, we’d find a rose underneath a—a glass thing, what’s it called—losing petals. Metaphorically.”

easy livin' by sarcasticfishes | Buzzfeed Unsolved (Fallout AU) | Ryan/Shane | 6k | The Wasteland - and Ryan - through Shane's eyes.

(in nocte consiliam by oxymoronic | Bartimaeus | Bartimaeus/Nathaniel | 4k | London, 2003. Britain is on the brink of war, and someone is trying rather hard to kill John Mandrake.)

made of glass the way you see through me by uneventfulhouses | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 19k | Will it always be like this? Ryan wonders, watching Shane lope up the snowy walkway and pushing his way through the front door, humming some jolly old tune in that way Shane’s prone to do. Theatrical, performing for an audience even though Ryan is the only one around.

All Your Stars In View by alpha_exodus | Harry Potter | Draco/Harry | 18k | Life after the war is difficult for Harry, especially when the only thing that makes him feel better is, oddly enough, being around Malfoy. So when Malfoy asks to paint his portrait, Harry can't refuse, even if it means baring himself in more ways than one.

13 Genuinely Awful Things About Steven by thefourthvine | Buzzfeed Worth It | Steven/Andrew | 10k | Andrew’s learned to like cake, he’s learned to like oysters, and he’s learned to like Steven.

we’ll make a brand new start of it (in old new york) by misantlery | Buzzfeed Worth It | Steven/Andrew | 10k | “Just to be clear,” Andrew says. “You want me to pretend to be your boyfriend at a party to spite your high school bully and your high school girlfriend and possibly the entire state of Ohio?”

Russian Roulette Croquembouche by misantlery | Buzzfeed Worth It | Andrew/Steven | 9k | “Get that on your business card,” Andrew advises. “Steven Lim, video producer, world traveler, fancy dessert boy. Human cream puff.”

rose-colored boy by juniperProse | Buzzfeed Worth It | Steven/Andrew | 2k | Andrew’s eyes are pink.

Like Wildfire by makemadej | Watcher Entertainment | Shane/Ryan | 20k | “Is this gonna be a thing with you?” Ryan demands. “You can’t keep committing to stuff that no one else knows about! When people online say they want you to be more open and vulnerable, this is not what they mean.”

Scratching the Itch by bendingsignpost | Doctor Who | Rose/Ten | 20k | Her mum had always told her that blokes had only one thing on their minds, but this was taking it to an entirely new level.

lie back and let me unlock you by Lise | The Untamed | Xiao Xingchen/Xue Yang | 7k | Xiao Xingchen, reluctantly, admits to certain fantasies that he has. His friend is happy to indulge him.

in our respective ways by Lise | The Untamed | Jiang Cheng & Lan Wangji | 6k | Jiang Cheng has his golden core back. But he seems to have lost Wei Wuxian.

By Proxy by Lise | The Untamed | Jiang Cheng/Lan Wangji | 12k | Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji, looking for comfort in all the wrong places.

some good mistakes by Lise | The Untamed | Jiang Cheng & Lan Wangji | 18k | Or, the one where Wei Wuxian vanishes and Lan Wangji, reluctantly, asks for Jiang Cheng's help tracking him down.

efforts in a common cause by Lise | The Untamed | Xiao Xingchen/Xue Yang/Song Lan | 12k | Everybody's walked out of Yi City alive. Now it's just three badly adjusted adults (and one badly adjusted teenager) trying to make things work - a project somewhat derailed by a night hunt that turns out to be something else.

swinger of birches by astronicht | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 23k | Lan Zhan is a little witch in the house on the hill, whispering out a love curse. Wei Ying is a witch undead, undone.

let me desecrate you by hkafterdark | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 6k | “Dangerous words.” Wei Wuxian drew back. The flickering candlelight gave him an otherworldly appearance; that, and his beauty, unchanged since the first time Lan Wangji had seen him. “You aren’t afraid to be at the mercy of the fearsome Yiling laozu?”

The Demon Affair by stereobone | Yu Yu Hakusho | Hiei/Kurama | 9k | Kurama accidentally seduces Hiei into a relationship.

i came to win (and i won) by paperclipbitch | The Queen’s Gambit | Beth/Benny | 3k | They play chess, and they fuck.The two things are not the same.

February

Sylvain Gautier Would Love To Try To Solve All Your Problems Through Sex (Hey It Might Help) by Fall Out Boy by harriet_vane | Fire Emblem: Three Houses | Sylvain/Felix | 22k | In which Sylvain wakes up on the wrong tour bus, and refuses to be their sex therapist (unless Felix asks nicely)

μήτηρ, in the Greek by antistar_e (kaikamahine) | Hades | Nyx & Persephone, canon relationships | 37k | At the end of this recounting, she tilted her head and asked politely, Is this not how you have children?Uh, no, said Persephone.

that voodoo that you do so well by veterization | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 18k | Ryan buys a voodoo potion oil at Voodoo Authentica meant to attract Yummy Boys. Appropriately, things happen.

A Bridge Between by Runespoor | Spirited Away | Gen | 3k | Years later, Chihiro moves into a new apartment; her parents help.

the ghost king's bride by arahir | Tian Guan Ci Fu | Hua Cheng/Xie Lian | 10k | Ghosts won't stop giving Xie Lian flowers, Hua Cheng won't stop teasing, and Xie Lian is out here doing his best, man.

Side bitch out of your league by rohkeutta | Captain America | Steve/Bucky | 3k | “I tried to call Sam,” Captain America says, bewildered. He’s sprinting like Usain Bolt and doesn’t sound even a little out of breath. Fucker. “Who’re you?”

cause in your warmth (I forget how cold it can be) by madnessandbrilliance | Promare | Lio/Galo | 7k | Lio is always freezing. Galo is always warm. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out the rest.

backdraft by broments | Promare | Lio/Galo | 32k | It happens in an instant, Galo gaping like an idiot while Lio presses forward to defend against the perceived threat, the weapon sparkling but not burning as it kisses Galo's throat.

Yosuke will now die for you! by DragonBandit | Persona 4 | Yosuke/Souji | 5k | ...This, causes problems.

dramamine by brawlite | The Untamed | Song Lan/Xue Yang | 7k | Song Lan is having a bad morning. Help comes from the last person he'd expect: Xue Yang.

Hearth and Home by lady_ragnell | Leverage | Alec/Eliot/Parker | 1k | When Eliot goes to a temple, or when he’s in one place long enough to build a shrine, he doesn’t do it for Ares. He does it for Hestia.

Where One Ends and the Other Begins by kalliopeia | Leverage | Alec/Parker/Eliot | 30k | Nobody’s particularly shocked when the job goes spectacularly sideways because their loot turns out to be magic. Parker and Eliot begin reading each other’s minds, accidental sharing happens, and shenanigans result.

Hungry Thirsty Roots by coolkidroland | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 56k | In which Akira absolutely does not learn to leave well enough alone. **

Without Grasping Yet by Angelic_Ascent | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 8k | Akechi and Akira end up far too cramped for comfort in the Morgana bus. And then they're left alone in Mementos.

Falling Up by KivaEmber | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 2k | “If it helps…” Akira spoke up suddenly, his tone morbidly amused, “I forgive you, for shooting me in the face.”

March

Touch of Forbidden by tirsynni | LoZ | Ganondorf/Link | 2k | Nabooru warned him not to travel to the Spirit Temple. So of course Link went to the Spirit Temple.

breaking the same old heart by tardigradeschool | The Adventure Zone | Magnus/Taako | 11k | Taako and Magnus in triptych: before, during, and after the Bureau.**

your head is good, it’s loyal, it’s clean by Anonymous | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 4k | "Here, I do this all the time."Too quickly for him to react, Taako plucks away one of his golden rings and slips it onto the ring finger of Magnus' left hand.

bruising kisses, whispered confessions by tangerine_skye | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 3k | The trio stop over at an inn for the night. Taako and Magnus share a bed.

i can see what's coming (but i'm not saying it) by pansywaist | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 3k | His breath is still hot on Taako's lips, distracting enough he almost misses the strained whisper: “I thought I was gonna lose you.”

Emergency Consolation in the Pocket Spa by Anonymous | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 3k | If Magnus wants to hug a wizard, Magnus gets to hug a wizard.

together for the long haul by kismetNemesis | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 6k | Magnus and Taako were married on a bright spring day in the year after they saved the world.

thin skin, bruises, and a cold cup of tea by GayFrankensteinsMonster | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 3k | Sleep is for the weak, and Magnus has no weaknesses, except for his own natural curiosity.

tender is the night by dollylux | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 10k | “It’s just…” He runs a hand through the thick bramble of his hair, gripping the crown of it to anchor himself. He sighs, slumping back against the footboard. “I guess I’m just not very good at one on one. Like, not… not in any way.”

a note is attached to the top of the vial by GayFrankensteinsMonster | TAZ | Kravitz/Taako, Magnus/Taako | 5k | Elves have a lifespan of up to six hundred years. The people that you know don't even come close to that.

Pieces of Memory and Heart by ellemaris | Raya and the Last Dragon | Raya/Namaari | 1k | Raya isn't sure how to heal everything between Heart and Fang, but returning something important to Namaari seems like a start.

the gods laugh by miss_aphelion | The Untamed | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji | 11k+ | WIP | Wei Wuxian is just getting used to being alive again when he's ripped from the world he knows. He wakes in a place where his sister and her husband live, where his brother doesn't hate him, where the Wen remnants have all survived.

In Your Room, In Your Bed by giraffeter | The Untamed | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji/Jiang Cheng | 25k | After Wei Ying is disowned, Yu Ziyuan forbids Jiang Cheng from letting Wei Ying live with him. Jiang Cheng lets him stay anyway because Fuck That. He tells his parents Lan Zhan is his new roommate instead.

in the blossom season (in the pouring rain) by varnes | The Untamed | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji | 14k | “Doctor Flowers,” Lan Zhan repeats, pointing at the tiny plum tree, just to confirm that his son is suggesting a magical tree named Doctor Flowers sprouted overnight and made their tame family project turn into a verdant jungle.

34 years old - 5'8" - DL - no-BB by withpractice_ff | Ace Attorney | Edgeworth/Phoenix | 3k | Phoenix finds Edgeworth’s Grindr profile

spinning with the stars above by tardigradeschool | The Untamed | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji | 7k | Wangji returns home to Vulcan for the first time since he left for Starfleet Academy, this time with Wei Ying at his side. He’s not expecting Wei Ying and his uncle to be fast friends, but things go poorly in a very different way than he was expecting.

every breath that comes before by tardigradeschool | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 10k | Or, what if that cup of wine Wei Wuxian drank for Lan Wangji after the Phoenix Mountain hunt wasn't just wine?

never love an anchor by tardigradeschool | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji | 31k | A fisherman and a selkie fall in love beside the sea. Regretfully, things are never quite that simple.

Be Careful by giraffeter | The Untamed | Song Lan/Xue Yang | 5k | Song Lan and Xue Yang try to survive a week in their shared apartment without Xiao Xingchen as a buffer.

April

running for a soft place to fall by tardigradeschool | The Untamed | Lan Xichen & Lan Wangji | 10k | As he leaves for his coming of age test at age twelve, half-Vulcan Xichen has a goal in mind. The rules of the kahs-wan prohibit taking food, water, or weapons. In accordance, Xichen is bringing none of those things, but he does have a compass tucked into his pocket. He is going to find his father.

an act too often neglected by Ariaste | The Untamed | Lan Xichen/Meng Yao | 60k | The single faceless, anonymous photograph on the profile that catches his eye is shot in elegant black-and-white, and there’s something about the crispness of the focus and the markedly off-center composition that says art, for once, rather than mugshot.The caption below is equally sparse: “5’6. Demanding.”

where you go, I'm going (so jump and I'm jumping) by Aria | The Magnus Archives | Martin/Jonathan | 6k | "I don't think so," Alex said. She looked at Martin. "Is this really how it went?"

Morning, keep the streets empty for me by feyburner | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 6k | Ghosts were drawn to the ring roads.

2am on a saturday by detectorist | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 11k | In which Lan Zhan gets high, slides into Wei Ying's DMs, and somehow ends up having the harmonica played to him at 2am in the morning.

Grief Kindly Stopped by ShanaStoryteller | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 5k | Nothing leaves the Burial Mounds alive.

Boat Basin by downjune | The Falcon and the Winter Soldier | 5k | He thought the 21st century now maybe suffered from an overabundance of classifications for all the different ways to fuck and/or romance a person, but the most important thing—and his therapist had emphasized this—the most important thing was connection.

my touch magnifies by isozyme | Word of Honor | Wen Kexing/Zhou Zishu/Ye Baiyi | 7k | Wen Kexing gets hit with fuck-or-die sex pollen on the way to Longyuan cabinet. Everything would be fine, except Zhou Zishu’s been keeping an unfortunate secret: the nails in his chest mean he can’t get hard anymore.

DELIGHTFUL FANVIDS

January

2020 || Multifandom Mashup

Hades - Official Animated Trailer

Hades Mini-PMV: This Year

2020, I guess

MARVEL || Energy (ft. Easy McCoy + Black Hydra)

obi-wan || give it

2020 ll Multifandom Mashup

Multifandom | Goodbye 2020

Multifandom | Goodbye 2018

2018 Multifandom | MASHUP

His Dark Materials - No Sanctuary

Lyra & Mrs. Coulter | Hurricane

► mrs. coulter || way down we go [hdm]

Wonder Woman || BORN READY

Vikings | The End of the Journey

February

MARVEL || Ready Set (ft. Vo Williams)

MARVEL || Here We Go (ft. Chris Classic)

MARVEL || Is You Ready || The Falcon and the Winter Soldier

Never forget || Hualian - Hua Cheng x Xie Lian AMV

【魔道祖师 / MDZS】Animatic - The First Siege | Safe & Sound

The Jedi Way | THE MANDALORIAN

Multifandom || Going Bad (feat. Drake)

March

Broccolli Casserole--The Untamed

Hey Brother - The Adventure Zone Animatic/PMV

The Adventure Zone: Balance trailer

The Adventure Zone: Balance Arc Trailer (Animatic)

13 Year Olds (A MDZS Animatic by Arcxus)

Multifandom || Die In This Town

DNA | shadow & bone

(Marvel) Wanda Maximoff | Grief

Defying Gravity | MDZS/CQL Animatic

It’s Quiet Uptown | MDZS Animatic

To The Stars

(Marvel) WandaVision || Awaken

Walt Disney Animation Studios | A Magical Journey

We don't have forever.

stop living a fake life.

► Wanda Maximoff | PAINT IT BLACK (+15k)

Multifandom || Take It (c/w Quang Truong) ft. @SEIGE WORLD

Kylo Ren | STAR WARS

The Lord of the Rings Trilogy

April

MARVEL || Natural ft.ImagineDragons

xue yang & xiao xingchen ➤ gasoline

WEN KEXING || GASOLINE

Wen Kexing ✘ Zhou Zishu || Dandelions

Play With Fire - Wen Kexing

TOXIC ~ Wen Kexing ~ word of honor ~ 山河令

(Marvel) Bucky Barnes | Free

Bucky Barnes | Feeling Good

The Falcon and the Winter Soldier || Next Level ft. @7kingZ || (Marvel)

Eternity looking down on us.

The complexity of reality.

Captain America

✗ The Crows | Trouble (Shadow&Bone)

Shadow & Bone | Paint It Black

The secret fate of all life.

DELIGHTFUL MUSIC

January

A Better Version - Jessie Shelton

Start a War - Klergy, Valerie Broussard

Meet Me in the Dark - Melissa Etheridge

ily - Surf Mesa, Emilee

Space Man - Eurielle

To Be Loved - Aurora

In the Blood - Darren Korb

Can’t Help Falling in Love - Tommee Profitt

Astronomical - SVRCINA

Oh Comely - Neutral Milk Hotel

In This Shirt - The Irrepressibles

goblincore + cottagecore

moonlit love letters 🌙💌 (sailor moon-inspired lofi mix)

Moonlight Densetsu Lo-Fi Remix 1 hour version

Peaceful Meditation

February

Never Forget You - Zara Larsson

Is You Ready - Migros

Recomposed Four Seasons - Max Richter

The End - JPOLND

Love Yourself - Sufjan Stevens

Deja | Daniel Roure

Used To Like | Neon Trees

Material Boy - Sir Sly

Willow - Taylor Swift

Overture - Apashe

Evangeline - Josh Garrels

Gris, pt 1 - Berlinist

Inferno - Hiroyuki Sawano

March

BAMBAM - Angie

Dictator - Rei Ami

Demons - Hayley Kiyoko

Runaway - Rei Ami

Deep Blue - Marcus Warner

Brave New World - Kalandra

Nero - The Speed

The Path of Silence - Anne Sophie Versnaeyen

Tuleloits - Kerli

Soft to Be Strong - Marina

Relic - Reeder

Ascension - Gorillaz

Will You Follow Me Into the Dark - Klergy

Voidfish (Plural) - Rachel Mitchell

Raya and the Last Dragon soundtrack

Unicorn Wizard - Ninja Sex Party

Me Too - Meghan Trainor

Umbrella - Rihanna

Colors Flying High - Lollia

Wake Up, Get Up, Get Out There - Lyn

lovely - khalid

Burn My Dread - Lotus Juice

Progress - The Dear Hunter

My Mother Told Me - Rachel Hardy

Savage Daughter - Sarah Ross

Four - Sleeping At Last

April

The Other Side - Amarante

Predator & Prey - Griffin Puatu

As the World Caves In -Matt Maltese

Tell Her I Wasn’t Scared - Dan Thiessen

Esmeralda - Adriel Genet

Woods - AfterInfinity

So Human of You - Shireen

Flags of Rome - Jesper Kyd

Do It All the Time - I don’t Know How But They Found Me

Hummingbirds - Venus Hum

On and On - Curtis Harding

Grand Escape - RADWIMPS

my ex’s best friend - machine gun kelly

Sofia - Clairo

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun - Charlotte Lawrence

Next Level - 7KingZ

Tell Me - Johnny Jewel

Get Out of Town - Firefles

Music for Anglo Saxes

I See Darkness In You - Red Mecca

Satan Is His Name - Holly Golightly

Rocky Trail - Kings of Convenience

Story - NF

Because the Night - 10,000 Maniacs

Use to Be (L.O.V.E.) - Chelsea Collins

Bird on a Wire - Simone Istwa

Huzzah - Nathan Barr

POSTED FIC

January

gonna make you feel, boy | Hades | Megaera/Thanatos/Zagreus | 1,101 words | “You can touch, you know,” she murmurs, satisfaction and anticipation warring within her. Her pulse pounds. Zagreus’s eyes have darkened, his pupils eating up all that color. He looks good enough to eat.

February

how long do we have? | She Ra | Adora/Catra | 1,539 words | “The war is over, Adora,” Catra tells her. Adora hums. “Maybe. Maybe not.”

March

only fools rush in | The Adventure Zone | Taako/Magnus | 5,209 words | “Okay,” Taako says, sitting down heavily. “So. Ancient ritual to… bring people together?”

til my lungs both billow out | The Magnus Archives | Jon/Martin | 748 words | The knife goes in. The tape runs out.

the echo, as wide as the equator | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 2,927 words | “Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying whispers after it is done.

April

N/A

WIPS | UNPUBLISHED | ORIGINAL

January

1685 words of Buzzfeed Unsolved, tattoo AU

February

N/A

March

3121 words of Magnus/Taako, Stolen Century verse Posted!

April

852 words of Steve/Billy

FANMIXES/GRAPHICS

January

got the morbs: sad/somber songs for sad/somber people

2021: a mix for the year that comes after 2020

Sahara Baby: a mix for songs that sound like Spanish Sahara

Fire Baby: a mix for songs that sound like Play With Fire

Consequences Baby: a mix for songs that sound like Consequences

Paradise Baby: a mix for songs that sound like Paradise Valley

Real Boy: a Zagreus playlist

February

N/A

March

only fools rush in: a taako/magnus playlist

pomegranate seeds: a persephone playlist

make them bow: a megaera playlist

fuck feelings: a taako playlist

til my lungs both billow out: a jonmartin playlist

April

i am my mother’s savage daughter: a playlist for the girl

#heather says what #heather writes #scrapbook #2021

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aion-rsa · 3 years

Text

Resident Evil Village Ending and Post-Credits Scene Explained

https://ift.tt/3h6PzKj

This article contains Resident Evil Village spoilers.

While there’s been no shortage of Lady Dimitrescu memes in the months leading up to Resident Evil Village‘s release, it’s funny to think that all of the game’s trailers, previews, and demos barely told us anything about the sequel’s actual plot. We knew it would star Ethan Winters, we knew it involved a creepy village filled with retro horror threats, and we knew the internet was desperate for the attention of tall vampire ladies everywhere, but many of the most important questions about the game’s lore remained unanswered.

Why does Chris appear to shoot Mia in one of the first Village trailers? Why is this town full of vampires and werewolves? Who is Mother Miranda? How does all of this relate to Resident Evil 7? Is Resident Evil Village actually a remake of Resident Evil 4? Despite a host of compelling theories, the answers to those questions (and many more) remained frustratingly unanswered.

The good news is that Resident Evil Village eventually does answer a lot of those questions. You may not like all those answers (and you’ll have to wait a little while longer to wrap up a few of the plot threads it leaves hanging), but if you’re ready to discover the truth, then join us as we take a look at the true meaning of Resident Evil Village‘s ending and post-credits scene.

Chris Tells Ethan the Truth About Mia’s Death

After being knocked down into the underground area of Heisenberg’s factory, Ethan runs into Chris just as he’s building some kind of giant tank (*checks notes*yes, that’s right). Ethan finally asks Chris why he killed Mia, and Chris informs him that the person they killed wasn’t Mia: it was Mother Miranda.

Yes, Mother Miranda can assume different forms, and Chris and his team were well aware of her abilities when they shot “Mia.” What they didn’t know is that Miranda can also assume the form of a corpse, which is how she convinced the assault team they had completed their assignment. After the team left Ethan and Mia’s house, Miranda came back to life, attacked the vehicle Ethan and Rose were being escorted in, kidnapped Rose, and took her to the village.

Armed with the truth (or at least some of it) and a brand new tank, Ethan leaves the underground area to confront Heisenberg.

Ethan Winters Dies (Kind of)

Shortly after defeating Heisenberg (with a homemade tank, mind you), Ethan receives a call from Chris who tells him to not confront Miranda by himself. That plan fails spectacularly as Miranda (in the form of Mia) confronts Ethan shortly thereafter.

Miranda shapeshifts throughout the conversation (and even takes the shape of the crone we’ve seen throughout the game), but we finally see Miranda in what appears to be her true form (or a close approximation of it). She then confirms what has been hinted at all along by saying that Rose is an extraordinarily powerful being and that Miranda wants to claim her as her own daughter. As we’ve seen in the case of the villagers and the four noble bosses, Miranda is obsessed with finding some kind of family. She believes that Rose is powerful enough to survive a ritual that will effectively bond the two and awaken Rose’s true power.

While processing this information, Ethan Winters is seemingly killed by Mother Miranda when Miranda rips his heart out of his chest and drinks his blood. It seems to be the clear end of the line for Ethan, but as we’ll soon learn, the situation is not quite as simple as all that.

Chris and Blue Umbrella Assault the Village During Mother Miranda’s Ritual

After reviewing the circumstances that led to Ethan’s death, Chris leads an assault against the village just as Miranda is beginning her ritual with Rose. The team informs Chris that he should have told Ethan about his plan, but Chris says there was no time.

During this assault, Chris notices that another team of soldiers is invading the area via helicopters. He identifies the invaders as “BSAA,” and seems to believe they may be after the source of power that fuels Mother Miranda and the village.

Before we go any further, let’s talk about the BSAA a bit as they’re a pretty important part of the RE franchise and play a role in some of what happens next.

What is the BSAA?

BSAA stands for “Bioterrorism Security Assessment Alliance.” They’re a security response group created after the fall of Umbrella as part of a global effort to combat the rise in bioterrorism.

Chris previously worked for the BSAA (he was employed by them during the events of Resident Evil 5), and they’ve long been presented as a force for good. However, concerns regarding their funding, techniques, motivations, and apparent fascination with bioweapons themselves have long led some fans to believe that there may be more to the group than meets the eye.

Chris left the BSAA some time ago in favor of a role with Blue Umbrella, but he has seemingly stayed in some kind of contact with the orginization and has perhaps formed a working relationshiop with them. He seems surprised by their presence in the village, though, and we’re about to learn why.

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By Matthew Byrd

Chris Discovers The Connection Between Umbrella and Mother Miranda

While working his way through the village, Chris eventually goes underground (literally) and discovers a very old laboratory filled with photos of a young woman and a few companions. He also finds a letter written by Oswell E. Spencer: the founder of Umbrella.

In fact, this letter (which is addressed to Mother Miranda), reveals that Spencer met Miranda years ago and spent quite a bit of time with her discussing the logistics and implications of resurrection. In that note, Spencer says he believed that resurrection could (and perhaps should) be performed in large numbers whereas Miranda seemed more focused on the resurrection of select individuals.

Due partially to their differing views, Spencer eventually left Miranda and took what he learned (as well as a few samples of the material that Miranda drew power from) to help him form Umbrella. In fact, Spencer confirms that he got the idea for the company’s name and logo from the shape of the symbol that we’ve seen multiple times throughout the village. That symbol seems to correspond to the area’s four noble houses, though the exact meaning and history of its design are somewhat ambiguous.

It’s a pretty shocking revelation that Chris doesn’t have time to dwell on as he soon runs into a surprisingly very much alive Mia (the real one). Chris tells Mia that Ethan is dead and that Miranda has Rose. Mia then surprises Chris by saying that Ethan can’t be dead as there’s something about him that nobody really knows.

How is Ethan Alive? Is Eveline Still Alive?

After Mia tells Chris that she thinks Ethan is alive, we cut to Ethan as he rises from his grave (so to speak) and starts crawling through what appears to be a frozen wasteland. Ethan then runs into Eveline who suggests to him that the reason he’s able to survive so much punishment is that he’s technically been dead for years.

Based on Evelin’s story and a few context clues, it seems that Ethan was killed by Jack Baker at the beginning of Resident Evil 7. From there, he was infected by the mold and became something between human and monster. This would certainly help explain Ethan’s incredible regenerative abilities as well as some of his apparent hallucinations. It doesn’t really answer a lot of questions regarding why Ethan has been able to retain so many elements of his humanity (and how he had a child that seems to have inherited some of his abilities), but it seems that these are all questions that weren’t meant to be answered (or are just old fashioned plot holes).

What about Eve, though? So far as I can tell, she’s just a figment of Ethan’s imagination. She’s something buried in his subconscious to help him understand this thing that he’s been ignoring for a long time. It does not appear that she’s actually still alive.

In any case, Ethan is properly resurrected shortly thereafter and soon finds himself in the back of The Duke’s carriage. The Duke is already taking him to Mother Miranda (who is trying to complete her ceremony with Rose). Ethan asks The Duke who, or what, he is. The Duke doesn’t give a clear answer and even suggests that he isn’t entirely sure he can answer questions about his origins. The debate between missing plot point and intention ambiguity rages on.

Soon, Ethan arrives at the village where he is finally able to confront Mother Miranda just as she’s performing the ritual on Rose.

Miranda’s Ritual and Ethan’s Final Sacrifice

Miranda’s ritual takes a strange turn when she completes at least a part of it and suggests that the ceremony is somehow draining her powers from her. Is Rose absorbing that power? Ethan gets the drop on her soon thereafter and distracts Miranda long enough for someone (presumably Chris) to shoot Miranda from a distance. Miranda then morphs into a grotesque creature that certainly seems to be closer to her final form than anything we’ve seen before.

Her banter with Ethan confirms that she’s been desperately seeking a family that shares her corruption and perhaps could even stay alive as long as she’s able to. She also refers to Rose as her daughter at several points, but that reference seems to be based on how Ethan’s abilities (and Rose’s birth/powers) can be traced back to Ethan’s “mold” infection (which in turn can be traced back to Miranda) and how Miranda disguised herself as Mia for a time. It doesn’t seem the game is suggesting that Miranda was Mia at the time that Rose was conceived and born, but the timeline of that ordeal isn’t entirely clear.

In any case, Miranda is soon defeated by whatever magic causes the most powerful being imaginable to be beaten by Ethan’s bullets. Ethan finally rescues Rose, meets up with Chris, and starts walking away from the village. It’s then that a giant creature (another of Miranda’s many forms) emerges from under the village. Chris informs Ethan that they have to run away as the entire area is rigged to explode as soon as Chris activates the detonator he’s carrying.

Ethan soon gives Rose to Chris and steals the detonator from Chris’ hand. He asks Chris to guard Rose for him and indicates that he’ll destroy himself in order to ensure the bombs go off. Chris reluctantly agrees, runs away, gives Rose to Mia, and the three of them fly away as a massive explosion seemingly confirms both Miranda and Ethan’s actual deaths.

The BSAA Bioweapons and a “Storybook” Ending

Chris, Mia, Rose, and one of the Blue Umbrella soldiers are escaping via a helicopter when the soldier informs Chris that the troops that the BSAA was sending into the village were actually advanced bioweapons. Sure enough, we soon see the hollowed-out body of a soldier in a BSAA uniform. It appears to be “zombie-like” and certainly something other than human.

Chris is shocked by this information and informs the soldier to take them to the BSAA HQ in England so that someone can answer for this. The game then cuts to credits shortly thereafter.

There are a couple of ways to read this whole thing. It’s possible that BSAA could have been partially responsible for this situation, but based on what we know about Mother Miranda’s story, it seems more likely that she’s the one responsible for all of the village’s woes over the years. Maybe the BSAA played a small role in certain events, but it doesn’t seem like they’re “responsible” for the events in either Resident Evil 7 or Village in any meaningful way that would make them the ones pulling the strings.

The more likely explanation here is that Chris is upset that the BSAA are using bioweapons and may have invaded the village in the hopes of securing Mother Miranda’s power source (or possibly Rose) as Umbrella’s founder once did years ago. Chris certainly seems like he’s still looking for someone to fight, and the idea that the BSAA may be morphing into a kind of reborn Umbrella would certainly give him the enemy that he’s been looking for.

It’s also worth noting that Resident Evil Village’s credits feature a retelling of the fairy tale from the game’s opening (in the form of a song), but this time, we get an extra scene in which the fairy tale girl’s father fights off the demons while her mother carries her to safety. That storybook was always meant to tease the events of Village, and this ending either suggests that the end of that story (which we didn’t hear when it was told at the beginning of the game) always echoed what would eventually happen in the story. It could also just be a stylish way to conclude the adventure. I’d vote for the latter.

Then again, that scene isn’t the “real” ending to Resident Evil Village…

Resident Evil Village’s Post-Credits Scene Sets Up Rose’s Adventure and Resident Evil 9

Stick around until the end of Resident Evil Village’s credits, and you’ll see a short scene starring a young girl on a bus. She’s alternating between watching a mother read a book to her child and staring out the window on a sunny day.

She gets off when the bus stops and makes her way to a headstone with the name “Ethan Winters” etched into it. It’s clear that this is a grown-up version of Rose, who appears to be a teenager, though it’s possible her abilities make her true age hard to determine. She apologizes to her dad for visiting so late and mentions that she’s been busy with “tests.”

Rose soon walks away from the grave and towards a black truck guarded by a man in a suit. The man seems to indicate that Rose has escaped them, and even calls Rose “Eve” in a mocking way. Rose pins him against the vehicle and tells him to be careful as she has powers that even “Chris doesn’t know about.” Someone on the man’s radio mentions they have a shot on the target, but the man says not to worry about it as Rose is “only a child.”

As the man drives away, he mentions to Rose that she’s a lot like her father. Rose says she’s more like her father than even he knows. They fade into the distance shortly before a screen appears that reads “The Father’s Story is Done.”

It’s unclear how much time has passed since the scene in the helicopter and this sequence, but Rose is certainly much older than she was before. Chris is clearly watching out for her (as Ethan requested), though it seems that he’s worried about her powers and whether or not they will be able to control them. There’s no mention of where Mia is (if she’s still alive).

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

As for the final screen, it certainly seems to suggest that the next Resident Evil game will focus on Rose. That could be quite interesting as she not only has the same regenerative abilities her father possessed but may have additional abilities similar to the ones we saw Eve utilize in Resident Evil 7. If I had to guess, I’d say that BSAA’s use of bioweapons in the field inspired Chris to use Rose as a weapon of sorts, despite the fact that Ethan indicated he was against the idea of using Rose in that capacity whatsoever.

Will Rose actually be the star of Resident Evil 9? Where is Mia? What happened between Chris and the BSAA? Are Mother Miranda and Ethan truly dead? Who is The Duke? While we wait for the answers to those questions, be sure to let us know what you think about Resident Evil Village‘s ending in the comments below.

The post Resident Evil Village Ending and Post-Credits Scene Explained appeared first on Den of Geek.

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#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

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thenewlarislynn · 4 years

Text

Coffee Stained Confusion Ch. 13

~~~

Bucky walked into the living room and sighed. “Sorry that took me so long, they needed more details on HYDRA-” Upon seeing you sound asleep on the couch he smiled softly and went to his room. After grabbing a light blanket off the bed he re-entered the living room and gently covered you with it. He turned off the television, which had still been playing Brooklyn-99 and went to bed.

Not five minutes after he climbed into bed he heard a shrill scream come from the living room. Heart pounding he ran to the room, expecting the worst, only to find you sitting up on the couch, a few tears running down your face.

“Doll, what is it? What’s wrong?”

“Oh, Bucky, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to wake you I just-”

“Had a nightmare?” He guessed,

“Yes, I’m fine, though. It’s not a big deal.”

“Are you sure? After my time with HYDRA I had horrible nightmares, and one of the only things that helped was talking it out.”

“I don’t want to bother you, it’s late and-” “It’s not too late, and I don’t mind at all.”

“I was her, Elaine Berlioz, the agent that I killed,” your voice shook as you spoke, “and I could feel the fire, the heat, it was as if I was facing some divine punishment for what I did by experiencing it.” “One of the things HYDRA does is make you feel guilty for what happened. And although physically it was you who did that, it wasn’t you. What you did doesn’t define you as a person.” “Thank you, it’s just,” you paused, “I thought I was past this. I thought, I don’t know, I guess I thought I’d be able to move on.”

“Progress is not linear. I mean, I’ve been away from HYDRA for over a year and there are still nights where I wake up screaming. But I’ve also made a lot of progress. It isn’t as hard as it used to be, and I know you’ll make progress too. Sometimes you might fall back into negative thoughts, and that’s alright, but keep striving for a better outlook.”

You glanced down and smiled. “I never really thought about it like that.” He sat down on the couch next to you, “When I first came to the tower, Bruce and Natasha helped me deal with my PTSD. Not everyone was exactly welcoming at the time. They were some of the few who understood.” He paused and looked at the ground before continuing, “But after the truth of Tony’s parents was revealed, even they started to distance themselves.”

“What happened to Tony’s parents? I thought they died in a car crash.” “That was the official story that HYDRA spread, but in reality, I was responsible. Well, the Winter Soldier was, anyways. After that was revealed, Stark wasn’t exactly thrilled with my being here. Eventually, though it was all sorted out. We aren’t the best of friends, obviously, but we don’t hate each other either, which is more than I could’ve hoped for.” “I’m glad you told me about that, it must not be an easy thing to open up about. If it’s not too much trouble, I understand if you don’t want to, but would you be able to stay up with me and watch a movie or something? It probably doesn’t make much sense, but I don’t feel safe enough to go to sleep yet. With my anxiety I have a hard time sleeping in new environments sometimes, unless I have something to make me feel safer.” In a quiet voice you added, “Or if I have someone nearby who makes me feel safe.” Bucky nodded, “Of course I can stay up, I doubt I’d be able to fall asleep just yet anyways.”

Picking up the remote you turned on the television and began watching a comedic cooking show where none of the chefs actually knew how to cook. As you were watching the show it got chillier in the room and Bucky noticed you scootch a little bit closer to him. It wasn’t long after that when you sleepily laid your head on his shoulder. Noticing you were finally asleep again Bucky tried to reach for the blanket but couldn’t get it without disturbing you. Trying the next best option he gently put his arm around your shoulders, just to keep you warm of course, no romantic feelings involved- that’s what he told himself at least.

Soon after you snuggled in closer to him and Bucky recalled something that you’d mentioned earlier that evening. You couldn’t fall asleep if you didn’t feel safe around someone. ‘She feels safe around me,’ he thought to himself. ‘Well, that’s a first.’

~~~

You awoke the next morning to find Bucky in the kitchen making pancakes. You glanced over at him from your spot on the couch. “Well, look who finally decided to wake up. I’m making breakfast, chocolate chip pancakes.” You stood up and walked to the counter, “That sounds great, do you need any help?” “Nah, I should be fine, thanks though.” You smirked, “Really? Because the uh, pancake flour on your face tells a different story.”

He chuckled as he tried to wipe it off, “Okay, maybe I need just a little bit of help.”

“Yeah, I think you do. Here, I’ve got it,” you stood on your tiptoes and before you quite realized what you were doing, you wiped the powdery mix off his cheek. It was then that you realized just how close you two were standing. Taking a step back you felt a warm blush flood your face and instantly looked down. “Sorry about that, uh-” “It’s fine, really,” Bucky responded with a light laugh. He shook his head and headed back to the stove, trying to hide the slight butterflies he was feeling. Picking up the mixing bowl, he poured some of the mix into the pan and reached into a little basket near the fridge. Pulling out a hair tie, he quickly pulled his hair back into a cross somewhere between a ponytail and a bun. He walked back over to the counter and grabbed the bag of chocolate chips to put away.

“Wait, can I see that for a second?” He handed you the bag and you grabbed a few chocolate chips and sprinkled them onto the pancake cooking on the stove, then proceeded to put a few more in the mixing bowl. “There weren't enough chips in it,” you said with a slight smile. “My mom used to make these for breakfast, and the chocolate to pancake ratio was always perfect. Of course by that point it was basically chocolate chips with only some pancake, instead of pancakes with chocolate chips, but hey, they were good.”

“Well, that sounds delicious,” Bucky said with a smile. “I won’t tell Steve if you don’t.”

“Well, looks like we have a deal. And if he does find out, just let him know that at least now you didn’t have to add brown sugar to it.” “Brown sugar?” he asked. “Do you like, cook it in with the pancake or-?”

“I mean, I suppose you could, but whenever I have plain pancakes I sprinkle some brown sugar on top of it with the syrup, and it always tastes delicious. You’ve never had that?” “Well, no, growing up we didn’t really add much ‘flavor’ to food, and I never thought to try it once I got back.”

“You literally live in the Avenger’s tower and never thought of it? Well, I’ll need to have a talk with Tony about the tower’s food plan if I’m going to stay on the team,” you joked. “Oh, look that one’s ready!”

Bucky flipped the pancake and sure enough, it was a perfect golden-brown with melted chocolate chips scattered throughout.

“You can have the first one,” Bucky offered, “after all, it is your recipe.” Smiling, you accepted the plate and took a bite, and just as you thought, it was incredible. “It’s just like I remember,” you said, a soft smile playing on your lips and you thought about the last time you had these pancakes with your family.

It had been a bright June morning, and you woke up extra early to watch the Saturday morning cartoons. You heard your parents talking in hushed tones in the next room, but you were too engrossed in the episode of Looney Toons playing to pay much attention to their conversation. After the show ended you went to the kitchen and got out the pancake mix, but when you tried to pour it yourself the powder spilled all over you. Your parents came to the rescue, though, and soon enough you had an extra-chocolatey chip pancake in front of you to make up for all the Bisquick mix in your hair.

“These are delicious,” Bucky said, snapping you out of your thoughts. Then, changing the subject he asked, “Do you remember them? Your parents, I mean.”

“Uh, bits and pieces. Some memories are crystal clear and others seemes, I don’t know, warped almost. Maybe it’s for the best, it isn’t good to dwell on what could’ve been.” You chuckled, “I mean, that’s what my therapist told me anyways, but for all I know he may have been working for HYDRA, so maybe his advice isn’t the best.”

“Memories can be a tricky thing,” Bucky admitted with a laugh, “half the time Sam will say I did something as the Winter Soldier and I honestly don’t know if I did. Like last week he said I slashed his car tires, and I don’t think I did, but who am I to say? Oh, I almost forgot!” he exclaimed, “Steve said that Natasha wanted to start your training today. We should head down to the gym, best not to keep her waiting.”

~~~

Taglist:

@sydneyisnotawriter

Just a head’s up, the next update might be a bit short as my birthday is this week so I might not have much time to write! Like always, likes and reblogs are appreciated! Let me know if you want to be added to the tag list! Love you all <3

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the-omni-princess · 5 years

Text

Frozen Heart [Chapter 12]

Author: @the-omni-princess

Summary: After the war against Hydra, King Bucky comes home to take what has been promised to him since he was young, you. But he is not the same person as the young boy that you grew up with. Can she break through his tough shell and bring back the young man she once fell in love with? Or will she be forced to marry the monster everyone thinks he’s become?

Word Count: 3.1K

Pairing: King!Bucky x Fem!Reader (Royalty Au!)

Warnings: Torture, violence, language, ANGST, blood, injuries, major and minor character death, GORE, a hint of fluff

A/N:

Honestly some nasty stuff in the death and blood department. If that’s not your cup of tea, I can give you the rundown without the gore.

[Series Masterlist] [Masterlist]

----

Two weeks. It had been two weeks since you had shut those stupid doors to save him. Bucky had become a shell again, cold lifeless eyes, the only emotion that would show being anger. Steve hadn't seen him like that since his parents died. Steve had already told everyone that when it came down to it, fight, survive, and stay out of Bucky's way. He knew his best friend would tear into anyone that got in his way. Aurora and Raine had also been getting restless, as had Dermot. They knew something was up, as they hadn't seen you in weeks.

The troops from multiple kingdoms were ready and had started pushing Hydra forces back out of their own respective counties, but they couldn't figure out where they had taken you. New flash drives showed up, and Bucky watched every single one, letting the guilt wash over him as he saw them hurt you. Steve sat beside him, feeling guilt despite not even being in the same country when they took you. No. When you let them take you. Steve knew you better than that. He knew you must have seen something for the rash decision, and his suspicion was confirmed by Natasha after both Kings broke down in the War Room. "Seeing her scream again isn't going to do anything, Buck," The blonde looked towards his best friend, both sharing an equally pained look. Torturing yourself won’t help you. He wanted to say, but he knew better.

"There's literally nothing to do. I watered the plants in her greenhouse, so they wouldn't die. Checked in on Raine and Aura and Dermot, all three aren't doing well without her. Troops are ready to move the second we need them too, but we don't have a location. I'm missing something in these, I know it. They changed locations again and these videos are more recent. I'll figure it out." His eyes locked onto the figure of you on the screen, this time with a knife being pressed into your side, dangerously close to your stomach. As you screamed in pure agony, Bucky felt his heart drop, and yet he re-watched the video, over and over and over again.

Steve paused the video, sighing, exhausted from the lack of sleep. "Is there anything else, any clue she could have left?" He could see the flashes of emotions running through Bucky’s face. The guilt, shame, grief, fury, then finally a small glimpse of hope.

Bucky saw something. It was random, small and unnoticeable, but the way you tapped your fingers against the metal chair looked familiar. He gasped, clawing out of the chair and pressing play on the remote as he ripped it from Steve's hands. His eyes bore into your fingers, and Steve saw his friend smile for the first time in weeks. "Gods, she's an absolute genius!" He cried out, already shooting a text in the group chat for everyone to meet in the War Room.

Steve looked up at him, confused, "Care to explain?"

Nat was the first through the door, Wanda and Sam at her heels just as Bucky started to write out letters on a piece of paper. Steve moved beside him, and it clicked. "Morse code!" The room started to fill with the diplomats, Shuri glancing through the other videos to see you tapping more messages.

"She picked up a Morse code book in October, I knew she was learning but gods she picked it up fast," Bucky mumbled, rushing through an explanation. You had been giving them any information you realized, all through taps against the very chains that binded you. It was then Scott ran in, another flash drive in hand. Everyone in the room paled as they saw it, they knew their deadline to a decision was rapidly approaching.

Scott plugged the drive in, not waiting for instruction to start the video. You looked absolutely terrible still, yet with the new revelation of your secret messages, Bucky didn't focus on your new wounds, but the taps your fingers were giving. You were in a new space, and the video looked recent by the stages the bruises on your body were in.

Bucky scribbled out the last letter, just as the video started to replay. He stopped it, a wicked grin lighting up his features. "Call the troops to arms, I know exactly where they have her." Aurora looked up from her spot by the fire, sensing Bucky's mood shift as her ears perked up. "That is one spot they had me. She found my scratches on the cell wall, I used to draw on the cell walls to pass time, and she has been tapping exactly what place she's in." He tossed the paper in the middle of the table. The words spelt out 'Second Star 2 the Right.' At second glance to every paper written there they all had a description of some engraving written in them.

"So, who's coming to fight?" Steve spoke up; it was obvious both he and Bucky would be going. Natasha, Wanda, and Sam all stood at the same time. Choruses of "Me," "I will," and an enthusiastic "Lets kick Hydra's butt!" From Tony, all present at the table stood, ready to fight.

Aurora yipped, standing beside Bucky, he rubbed her ears, "Let's bring her home, Aura."

It was dark, that's all you really knew. A new cell, this one was a bit nicer than most others, because you knew something your captors didn't. You ran you hand against the wall, finding the two stars carved into the stone, it made you smile. Second star to the right and straight on ‘till morning. Bucky's favorite story as a child was Peter Pan, and even in the face of torture, he clung onto the story. And Hydra, in their sick and twisted minds, thought it would be perfect to toss you into the cage that once held your fiancé.

Rumlow stormed in, and you winced from the sudden influx of light. "Let’s go princess," he dragged you up, roughly grabbing onto your shoulder. You limped as you were hauled, being pushed in front of him and now in front of Alexander Pierce. His hand clamped onto your arm, jerking you in front of him as he pressed a dagger to your stomach. As someone pounded onto the door, you realized you just became a human shield. Metal hit against the metal door and your heart jumped up to your throat. Bucky.

The door finally gave way, blowing straight off its hinges. Bucky stood there, in a navy-blue uniform stained in red, you realized a second later he was wearing his Howling Commandos uniform. He wanted to be seen from a mile away. Growling brought your attention to the white wolf at his feet. Aurora had blood coating her snow-white fur, her haunches back, and golden eyes focused onto the knife against you. Steve was right behind Bucky, but you could only tell that due to the red and blue of his uniform reflecting off of Bucky's metal arm.

"Well I'd say this is a lovely reunion, but my dead men outside would beg to differ," Rumlow spoke just behind you, using you as a shield as well. They must have been caught off guard, neither men that held you had a gun, unlike the two men at the door.

"Let her go, and I'll kill you both quickly," Bucky growled, voice low, teeth bared. This was a side of Bucky you'd only heard the stories of. The Winter Soldier, The White Wolf. Cold, calculating, lethal. He looked every part like the fearsome feral wolf coming to exact revenge like in the stories you two used to read when you were younger about his Kingdom’s mythologies.

The knife dug a little deeper into your side, making you gulp faintly. Bucky’s eyes glanced towards it for a split second before shooting back at your captors. The blue in his eyes looked more like ice than normal, and that’s when you started to fully take him in. The slight puffiness in his cheeks, dark sunken circles around his eyes, his chestnut hair grown out a bit more, a gruffy beard back in place. He had not been taking care of himself in your absence. You wanted to rush forward and hold him, tell him you were alright, that he was alright, that everything would be okay. Yet the dagger against your womb held you still, the silent threat enough to give you pause. It wasn’t just you anymore, you would have to be more careful than reckless.

“I’m not a fool, you killed every last man outside. We, and the Princess will be leaving. I don’t know how you found us, but the rest of my armies are on their way. Try anything and my hand just might slip.” Pierce’s voice made you wince, the vibrations as he held you against his chest made your stomach turn.

“I told them,” you spat out, a wicked grin curling your busted lip up. You looked a little worse for wear, and you were terribly faint, the man behind you having to practically hold your weight just to keep you standing, but you were not helpless. A week into your torture is when you finally found your escape route, and promptly planned for this exact moment. You weren’t foolish enough to believe it would be easy, however, you knew you could use a few things to your advantage. Surprise, adrenaline, and your own will to survive.

“What do you mean you told them? You’ve been chained up in a cell the past two weeks!” Rumlow sounded off, the surprise in his voice was not hidden well.

You managed a weak chuckle, your voice hoarse from weeks of screaming and crying and pain yet you pushed that away to increase your breathing. “You didn’t just underestimate them,” Your heart rate was increasing, the steady beat turning erratic as your heart practically pounded against your chest. Your vision tunneled as your pupils dilated, your body tensing like a viper about to strike. This wasn’t just a fight for your own survival, but a fight to save the life growing in you. To save your family.

Bucky, ever the observant, was practically on the same wavelength as you. He had a wicked smirk on his lips, pride running through his eyes as you two locked eyes; he watched as you kicked your knees out from under you. Already weak from lack of food or water and the torture, it was easy to fall onto your knees, ignoring the searing pain that radiated up your knees from hitting the concrete hard, your thin clothes given to you by Hydra did nothing to protect you. The movement caught Pierce off guard, and he went tumbling forward as he tried to catch you to shield himself, eyes wide as the momentum made him topple over. In his haste to catch you and then catch himself before he fell onto his face, he dropped his dagger. He fell right onto his knees, and right in front of Bucky and staring down the bared teeth of a wolf.

You lurched forward, grabbing the dagger and you didn’t hesitate to throw it blindly behind you. It sunk into Rumlow’s thigh with a sick gush of blood. He yelped in surprise, tripping backward onto his ass. You smirked, tired and in pain, but now so close to freedom. “You also underestimated me.”

Pierce growled, reaching to grab onto you before he was pulled up by his collar by Bucky. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” His wolfish smile set with the timbre of his gruff voice sent a shiver down your spine. If you weren’t already on your knees, you’d probably fall onto them anyway at the sound of his voice. Pierce was tossed onto the floor, Bucky taking a tentative step towards you as Steve grabbed onto Pierce, both men looking at the disgraced king with disgust and pure malice. He couldn’t be killed right away; his death would have to wait until the newly dubbed Avengers outside knew what to do with the rest of the Hydra lands and it’s starving people.

Your knees buckled, the rush of fight-or-flight leaving your system, the adrenaline parting, causing your body to speed up again. You fell forward onto your hands, still dazed as your vision blurred. Bucky rushed forward but he was too slow, still a few steps away from you as Rumlow lurched towards you, recovering from the shock of the dagger still lodged into his thigh. A low growl set off as you saw a flurry of white launch at the man. His screams echoed in the room as Aurora ripped into the hand that came too close to you, and as you looked over you could see the blood gushing from his wrist, and you knew the pale white splotch in the wound was his exposed bone, splintered as wolf teeth gnawed into it. You placed a hand on Aurora’s hide, the wolf instantly releasing her death grip on the now defenseless man to sit beside you with a whimper. You wrapped your fingers around the dagger in Rumlow’s thigh, turning it, a revolting sense of satisfaction filling you as he howled in pain. “You are all idiots. I’ve been sending them messages through Morse Code for a week, and you were too busy getting yourself off to small cuts in my skin to even notice. You may have weakened me, but I’m a phoenix princess, and when I’m reborn through the ashes, I’ll be the Wolf Queen.” You twisted the dagger once more, snarling as the man looked up at you in shock and horror.

“Why wait, Princess? You could have killed us all before we pumped that blue stuff in you to weaken you.” Rumlow tried to put on a brave face, but he trembled, seeing you flash him a wolfish grin, the ice in your eyes as you regarded him as he clung to his bleeding and barley attached right hand.

“There are a thousand men outside these walls. I am not foolish enough to believe I could have fought them all, so instead, I out smarted you all.” With the last bit of your strength, you yanked the dagger lodged into his thigh out, blood spurting out instantly. You tilted you head, watching the blood pool around him, you had hit his femoral artery. “You’ll die. Alone, afraid, with no one to help you. Just like how your own people die every day in your kingdom.” You swallowed, your dry throat made the words hoarse, but you still spoke, letting revenge and anger cloud your mind. Your mind finally caught onto sanity just as Rumlow’s body hit the floor, his life seeping away from him. The dagger clinked against the concrete as it fell from your hands, blood coating the thin fabric around you that left little to the imagination, blood dripping down your hands. The still somewhat sane part of your mind felt sick that you could kill this man that lay dying on the ice-cold ground. Yet, you made your peace with it. It was necessary. It was survival.

Slowly, the clouds in your mind dispersed, becoming aware of the wolf whose head was in your lap, feeling the vibrations of her whining softly to get your attention. Big arms were around your shoulders, filling your chest with warmth and love. Bucky. Your Northern Star. Slowly regaining your senses one by one, your hearing was next, hearing Aurora’s whines as you ran your blood-soaked hands through her fur without thought, hearing Bucky’s words in your ear. He sounded pained, relieved, joyful even as he whispered pet names and sweet nothings. “Y/n/n? Doll? Come back to me, My Love.” That was the catalyst to the rest of your senses flooding you.

Bucky came back into focus, hands moving to cup your face gently. You could see the fresh wave of tears in his eyes as he looked at you like you hung the very moon in the sky every night. You could taste the cooper of blood in your mouth as you licked your dry lips, salt from your own tears made you realize you were crying as well.

You could smell the metal and blood and gun powder off of him, and something else. It was faint, but you could smell a hint of your favorite cologne on him. That sent more tears careening down your cheeks; he was here. He was really here. His smile lit up his face, seeing the recognition and life glimmer back into your eyes. “There’s my girl. My Queen, My Love, My World, My Star” his voice broke, and despite the weariness pulling at your bones, you pressed your hand against his cheek. The faint move smeared blood onto his cheek, but he leaned into your touch, letting his eyes close as he gathered the courage to move or speak again. “Let’s bring you home, doll,” he whispered softly against your palm. “Both of you,” he added, his flesh hand resting against your stomach.

In a swift move he picked you up bridal style. Frail, you couldn’t even cling onto him. You felt pathetic, but you didn’t really care, you were finally safe. Burying your face into his chest sent a warmth through you, making you smile dimly. “I love you,” you murmured quietly, now safe, your mind was at ease, tugging you towards the sleep that had evaded you for weeks.

“I love you too.” He kissed your head with pure adoration, clinging onto you as his life depended on it. You fell asleep easily in his arms, finally coming home. You didn’t see as he stepped over more than one mangled corpse on his way out, Steve right behind him tugging a tied up and frankly terrified Pierce. Aurora stayed at Bucky’s heels, never straying as they left the building.

Pierce glanced to the side, managing to see the corpse of Zola. Even dead his face was frozen in fear, his neck and chest a bloody mangled mess of deep gashes. Some looked clean cut, a sword perhaps, but the ripped-out throat was too rough to be done with a knife or sword. No, that was the wolf. The fact that the men that did that all for the woman in Bucky’s arms, the very woman that just killed his commanding officer as if it was child’s play, were currently dragging him away made the disgraced king shudder. He realized his fate was sealed the day he ordered his men to take you. He realized that mistake too late.

----

Tags:

Frozen Heart Tags:

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Bucky Tags:

@cassandras-musings / @darkness-doughter / @novaddictx / @thedancingnerdmermaid

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#Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #Frozen Heart #My writing #royalty au #princess!reader #King!Steve #king!bucky #arranged marriage AU #childhood friends to lovers

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sweets-fanfics · 4 years

Text

Honeymoon [RE] 3

Title: Party time

Wordcount: 2413

warnings: meh

Tags: *cricket sounds*

________________

7 Years ago

“Go on a date with me Rogers.” You smiled at him across the kitchen counter. He was doing the dishes which were actually really fun to watch because he kept spraying himself with the backsplash whenever he tried to rinse the spoons off. Also, a muscled guy with a towel on his shoulder and his sleeves rolled up was funny too.

Steve chuckled, “I think I’m a bit old for you don’t you think?”

“Oh come on.” You pouted.

“What about your brother?” Steve looked up at you and turned the water off.

“What about him?”

“Is he going to be okay with it?”

You perked up and smiled, “Are you saying yes?”

He took a long sigh and smiled. “It looks like I am.”

Present

“Y/N.” Wade bumped your shoulder and made you look up. He had placed a small glass of champagne in your hand. When? You didn’t remember you had just kept spacing out since you two had arrived at the party. You hadn’t seen Tony yet which was a good sign and bad sign. “Aren’t you here to give me moral support not the other way around?”

“I apologize. I’m not feeling a hundred percent.”

“Well get drunk and feel better. Unless you are underage and I was right the entire time.”

“I’m over 21.” You said sipping your champagne.

“Okay, okay. I’ll figure out your secret one day.” You rolled your eyes and turned around coming face to face with Rohdey from across the room.

The two of you locked eyes with each other silently. You shook your head no. He nodded yes. You shook your head no again and put a finger up to your lips.

“You see someone you know?” Wade asked as he ate some shrimp snack thing.

“Huh?” You looked at him. “No, I thought I did.” You looked back to Rhodey only to see he was no missing. Shit. “I’m going to find a bathroom.”

Wade started to say something but people came up and started talking to him so you used that as your cue to walk off. You tried to pretend you didn’t know where the bathroom was. That was very difficult.

You didn’t even get to the bathroom because two strong arms grabbed you on each side and led you to another room. As the door shut behind you the two guys grips didn’t loosen even when you saw Tony’s back to you.

“Hey, Y/N. I’ve been looking for you.” Tony turned and smiled.

You smiled back sweetly and shocked the two hands holding you. You looked back at Rhodey and Vision, “Hi Tony. How are you?”

“Let’s keep the powers to a minimum,” Tony said sitting down at his desk.

“I won’t do anything. I would appreciate it if you didn’t blow my cover. I’m on a mission.”

“Still working I see.”

“Gotta pay off the wedding I had.”

“Married?” Tony nodded. “Rogers I take it.”

“Y/N Rogers.” You said proudly.

“Congrats. Get out of my tower.”

“I’m on a miss-” Your phone went off making you look down at it. “Sorry, give me a second.” You pressed the answer. “Honey, What’s wrong?”

“Honey?” A voice said.

“Uh, who’s this?” You asked.

“Depends on who this is?” The voice asked.

“This is Y/N, his wife.”

“You married him?” The voice was now more recognizable.

“Bruce?” Tony shot up in his chair. “Where have you been? Why do you have Steve’s phone?”

“Can you pick me up and then we can talk?”

You peaked over your shoulder at Tony as Bruce told you where he was. “I’ll be right there.” You hung up and froze Tony’s feet to the floor. “Stay here.”

4 years ago

Steve placed the bowl of ice cream in front of me. He smiled at you and sat next to you on the couch. “Enjoy.”

“Thanks for walking to the store for me.” He rubbed your leg, “I could have gone.”

“No. A twisted ankle needs to stay elevated.”

There was a knock at your apartment door. “It’s unlocked come in.”

Bruce opened the door and Steve’s hand instantly left your leg. “Oh shit. Tony wasn’t lying.” He placed his stuff down and walked up to you. “What happened?”

You looked at Steve. “She tripped.” Steve answered.

“On what?”

“The Shield.”

Bruce looked at you. “How?”

“I tried to throw it and when I went to look for it I tripped on it.” You smiled.

Bruce sighed and put his hand on your head. “Well at least you weren’t actually training to fight.” He looked at you and Steve and saw you two grinning like you were hiding something. “I have told both of you multiple times…”

“I know.” You sighed.

“No more training.”

Present

You pulled up to an old run-down gas station somewhere outside of New York. You had told Wade there was a family emergency which wasn't a lie, you just left out the part that your older brother has serious anger issues and turns green.

You looked at the anxious-looking scientist sitting on the bus seat. He looked scared and tired.

You rolled the window down and honked the horn. Bruce jumped a bit but then got up and got in the car.

He looked at you silently as you sat in your chair fiddling with the radio until you found the fifties channel. “I sent you an invite. The first one actually. But it just got sent back every time I tried another address.”

Bruce sighed and looked at you. “It's a long story. But I was in Asgard.”

“With Thor?”

“As I said, it's a long story for another time. I'm sorry I missed your wedding. Let me guess you played oldies.”

“It is my favorite type of music, and mainly the only music Steve likes. My dress was white with soft lavender accents.”

“Sounds very pretty.”

You both smiled at each other. “So, why do you have Steve’s phone?”

“I stayed at a motel last night and when I went to check out the receptionist said someone dropped it off for me.” While he spoke you turned the ignition back on and started for your apartment.

“Then why doesn't my husband have his phone?”

“I have to talk to all of you about something important.” Bruce said looking around worried, “It’s a matter of life and death.”

You sigh, still not really understanding, “Everything is now days.”

---

You almost couldn't unlock the door because you were so nervous. Once you finally got it open you ran inside. “Steve!” You could hear the shower going which made you relax a little bit but you still wanted to be sure.

You slowly crept into the bathroom being sure that if it wasn't Steve you would take them down. Once in front of the shower, you pulled back the curtain quickly And made a ball of fire ready to throw.

“Jesus! Y/N!” Steve jumped.

“Oh, thank god. You're okay.” You took a long breath completely forgetting he was naked.

“Uh Y/N..?” Steve tried to say.

“Steve, why didn't you have your phone?”

“I misplaced it. You know how I am with all that tech stuff. But Y/N…”

“What?”

“We can talk after… but can I finish my shower?”

Your face turned bright red as you peaked down and realized what was going on. “Shit! I'm sorry!” You pulled the curtain shut. “Hurry up and finish we have company.”

You sat on the couch next to your brother. “Does he walk in on you like that?”

“N-no…. not yet.” You could feel your brother eyeing you. “We are married.”

“I take it by how red your face is, the two of you haven't….”

“Bruce!”

“Sorry.”

“I mean. We have but only once. I got called on assignment during our honeymoon.”

“Oh, ew I didn't actually want you to tell me.”

“Don't ask then.”

You heard your bedroom door open. “Bruce?” Steve asked, walking into the room.

“Rogers. Good to see you. Sorry I've been a little MIA.” The two shook hands.

You pulled Steve’s phone from your bag and handed it to him. “Bruce had this. Said someone dropped it off at the motel he was at.”

Steve looked at it confused and looked at you. “You look nice. I take it you weren't able to change?” You looked down at your form-fitting black dress that went to your knees.

“No. I got the call while I was getting interrogated by Tony.”

“He interrogated you?” Both asked.

“Yeah, had Vision and Rhodes literally drag me away. So embarrassing. I hope Wade didn't see.”

“I think I missed something important,” Bruce mumbled to himself.

“Did he hurt you?” Steve asked as he looked you over quickly.

“No, I'm fine.” You looked at your older brother. “You see, there was a bit of a disagreement and we no longer work with Tony, Rhodes, vision, and Nat is taking some leave time.”

Bruce looked at you, “Nat?”

“I'm not sure where she is. She helped Steve and Bucky escape. So I think she's hiding right now.”

“Bucky?” Bruce asked even more confused.

“Steve's childhood friend.”

“He's not the Winter Soldier anymore?”

“It's a really long story.” You and Steve said in unison.

Steve looked at the phone in his hand. “Where did you lose it?” You asked him.

“I placed it on the kitchen table yesterday and when I went back to grab it, it was gone.”

“Someone broke into our house? Just to take a phone?” Steve was scrolling through the phone when he stopped suddenly and he looked very angry. “What's wrong?” You peaked over his arm and saw a picture of you sleeping on the screen. “Well... that's... creepy.”

“Y/N, I didn't take this.”

Bruce looked at the photo. “Whoever this is,” you could see him trying to keep his temper under control, “They wanted to show that they can do whatever they want.”

“That's terrifying.” You whispered.

“That's disgusting,” Steve said angrily. “I'm going to call Sam I'll be back.” Steve walked out huffing and puffing.

You looked at your phone at the time. Three am… “I should call Wanda, maybe she can find something. I still don't really understand all she can do.”

You could still feel Bruce becoming angrier next to you. You grabbed his hand and smiled at him. “Hey, if I'm not too worried you shouldn't be either.”

“But they were able to get that close to you while you were completely defenseless.” You squeezed your grip on him.

“It's all good.” You sighed, “I'll text her tomorrow. I should get to sleep. I have work in the morning.” You pointed to the couch, “It folds out. I want you to stay here tonight.”

“I don't have a choice do I?” He smiled at you.

“Nope.” You smirked and kissed his cheek. “Goodnight.”

-----

You were completely happy the next morning. Steve was snuggled up behind you holding you close to him. You completely forgot your brother was there. Heck, you forgot some creepy stalker type person took a sleeping shot of you. It wasn’t until your phone wouldn’t stop vibrating that you knew it was time to get up.

Still, in the safety of Steve’s arms, you slowly reached for your phone. As you grabbed it Steve pulled you back to him putting you in a bit of an uncomfortable spot but you didn’t really mind. You hit the answer as you moved around so you were facing Steve. “Hello?”

“Y/N.” Wade groaned.

“Hungover?” You asked poking Steve on the tip of his nose softly.

“What happened to you last night? You just disappeared. Like magic…”

“Are you still drunk?” Steve, half asleep still, tried to take the phone and hang up. He was not a morning person like everyone thinks Captain America would be.

“A bit, but I’m mostly hungover. But we have work to do?”

“Starting fights with Al or those two X-men is not really considered work.”

“It’s not that kinda work.” He stopped and let out an ugly blech, “It’s like, I’m going to need your sniper thingy, work.”

That woke you up a bit more. “What happened?”

“That group you were telling me about. They sent me this creepy borderline stalker photo of you and some other chicks.”

You smacked Steve’s chest waking him up, “What other chicks?”

“Uh… I dunno. Chick with short red hair and one looks like that Avenger lady. The one that wears red.”

“Wanda?”

“Sure?”

“Okay, Wade. Suit up I’m going to be there soon just be ready.” You hung up and started dialing another number. You jumped out of bed and went straight for your Avenger outfit slipping it on as the phone rang.

“What?” Clint yelled still asleep.

“Where’s Wanda? Is she still at your family's farm?”

“Uh duh, Want to talk to her?”

“Just make sure she’s okay.”

You could hear him shuffling down the hall and knocking on her door calling for her. “Uh... She’s not here.” Clint said, sounding worried.

“That’s what I thought. Contact everyone and the director. Then go check on Nat since I know you know where she is.”

“What’s going on?”

“I think Hydra is trying to take us.” You said so Steve wouldn’t hear. “Let’s not freak Steve out. He’s about to have more than enough to worry about.” You walked into the living room to grab your keys. Bruce was sitting on the couch sipping tea. “By the way, tell the team; I’m bringing in the big guy.”

“Good. Good to have him back. We could have used him, back then. Make sure he knows.”

You hung up and started going for the door. “Where are you going?” Bruce asked.

You turned to him and smiled. “Work. I’ll be back around lunch to pick you and Steve up.”

----

You probably only got a couple of blocks when the car stopped. “Damn it. I told Steve we need a new car.”

You got out so you could jump-start the engine. That’s when you were knocked out.

-----

You sat up slowly rubbing the back of your head. “Ow. That’ll leave a bump.”

“Y/N?” Wanda asked softly, “You okay?”

You looked up and saw three other giant clear containers. Inside each of them was one person. One with Wanda, the other with Nat who was still knocked out and the last one shocked you the most. “Bucky?”

#Avengers #Avenger #avenger fanfiction #Steve Rogers #steve rogers x reader #honeymoon redo #honeymoon #writing #write #creative writing

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