#now I am still adding three and it is going to become a problem

[mctreeleth]

What a beautiful day to participate in democracy, eat a sausage and do a little thrift shopping, come home, hang out my laundry, put on the Transformers movie soundtracks, and re-arrange my hoard of plaid woolen blankets to accommodate their new hoardmates.

#The Transformers movie soundtracks remain the best movie soundtracks of all time this is the hill I will die on #also it would seem that I have finally begun to internalise the notion that I own enough plaid woolen blankets #because I only bought two today and I could have bought like eight but there is a set of criteria I have now #any old blanket I will buy if it is a decent size and in useable condition if it is under $10 #because I can tell myself I will use it for pattern testing even though as soon as it enters the hoard it becomes Precious™ #and then I can't use it for pattern testing because what if it turns out terrible? #but that little lie at the time of purchase is important #and I am willing to pay up to $25 if it is a colour I like or particularly unusual #and on rare rare occasions I will pay up to $40 if the colour is amazing #the ones I bought today were an amazing colour ($35 for a bright purple) and an unusual colour ($15 for a green and red but quite small) #also there were still a few in the boot of my car from last week when I bought 3 unusual pastels (yellow/grey pink/grey and orange/green) #the real problem is that now that I am working full time again I have much less free time for sewing #before I was adding three fabrics a week but using two #now I am still adding three and it is going to become a problem

[softtdaisy]

heyyyy i was wondering if you could use these two prompts for mick :)

"is the pillow wall really necessary?"

“can i come over tonight? is that stupid to ask?”

Pairing: Mick Schumacher x female!reader

Words: 1296

A/n: I'm so sorry it took me so long!! I was waiting for the perfect inspo for this story and i’m actually proud of it so i hope you will love it 

“I can’t believe you want me to watch that movie, again.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at Mick’s desperate tone through the phone. You knew he would be mad that you wanted to watch 13 going on 30 for the second time this week. But you also knew he wouldn’t say no. Mick never said no to anything that wasn’t a real problem. And let’s be honest, watching a romcom with you was never a problem. 

Mostly because you were alternating every movie night. And he made you watch an action movie the other night.

You’ve been doing this for weeks now. You knew Mick for several years but never really got to know him. Or even talk to him, actually. Your father was a mechanic and you loved going to the Grand Prix with him. That was how you met most drivers and Mick has always been such a sweetheart with you. You still couldn’t understand why you never talked more before.

Then, the last time you went to the Grand Prix, the weather was terrible. You were supposed to go for a drink with some friends but ended up staying at your hotel bar. Luckily, Mick was in the same situation. You spend the whole evening together talking about movies and cinema. Hours flew by and you both couldn’t stop adding something to the conversation. You never wanted it to end. It was like meeting your soulmate.

“We should watch movies together.” Mick offered. You immediately accepted. It was quite the perfect opportunity for you both. You were living alone and being by yourself every single night started to be a burden. Mick was still traveling a lot and he was feeling homesick most of the time. Especially because, even if he loved the team, he was also by himself.

Basically, that was how it started. At least three times per week, you were watching a movie with Mick without being together. Sometimes you were just commenting by messages and then calling each other to discuss it. Sometimes you watched the movie with a video call so you could chat and see each other’s reaction.

Nothing builds a relationship better than a shared passion. Mick slowly became one of your closest friends. But it would be a lie to not admit he was becoming more than a friend. There was something intimate in sharing your favorite movies with someone, with calling them almost every day and knowing everything about them. 

There was something intimate in falling asleep while still on the phone and waking up with the image of Mick sleeping in his hotel room too.

“It’s my night!” you replied to Mick’s complaint. “You can’t disagree with my choice.”

“We should have a rule that we can’t watch the movie two times in a week.”

“Well it’s too late for tonight.”

You put Mick on speakers while making dinner. You were cooking your favorite meal. One that happened to be Mick’s one too. What a coincidence. Maybe he could feel it through the phone. Or maybe he added some secret cameras in your apartment the one time he came. But he took you by surprise when he said “Are you cooking what I think you’re cooking?”

“Yes I am, Schumacher.” you laughed. 

“Can I come over tonight? Is that stupid to ask?” you heard him say. It wouldn’t be the first time Mick came to your place. He helped you after a Grand Prix weekend, which also happened to be your birthday weekend, and you came back with more bags that you could handle. He offered to make a detour and help you instead of letting you round trips in the stairs.

But you never did a movie night at your place. Or his. When Mick was in town he was often occupied and you couldn’t ask to steal a night or two with him. It would be a first. A good first.

And less than thirty minutes later, Mick was standing in your kitchen. He helped you with the dinner. Not specially with the cooking, no. More with the laughing either with the jokes or the mistakes he made. “I’m a terrible assistant, right?” he asked with some sauce on the nose. God knows how he managed to get that.

“Well, at least I don’t have to watch TV when you’re here.” 

After dinner, and while you were cleaning, Mick offered to prepare your room for the movie night. You imagined he would just look for the movie, hoping he wouldn’t trick you with it, and wait for you. But when you arrived in your own bedroom, you were surprised to see a literal pillow wall in the middle of your bed. You laughed for the situation as much as for the proud face he made.

"Is the pillow wall really necessary?" You asked when you reached the bed.

“Well, I know for sure that you take a lot of places in bed so…” he didn’t even finish his sentence before you hit him with the pillow.

The real excuse behind his architecture construction was that Mick was scared he might react, laying by your side. You had always been the girl he had a crush on since he entered F1. You were always there somehow, either close to him or on the other side of the paddock. But you were always sweet and he always felt like he was part of your world if you barely talked until a few months ago.

When this all started, he felt like living a dream. How lucky could he be to get to spend so much time with the girl he loved? But there were inconveniences too. Like listening to you speaking about your previous relationship or how you imagined the perfect one for you. Feeling so close and so far away from you at the same time. Accepting that, maybe, he won’t ever be more than just a movie friend for you.

He was glad that you didn’t break everything immediately and accepted to lay on your favorite side. He felt protected. Nothing could go wrong like this, he won’t let his love show without any warning.

Having no idea that you were struggling with the same issue, by your side. And watching one of your favorite rom coms with the man of your dreams next to you wasn’t as you expected it to be. In a perfect world, you would be in his arms, living your own favorite.

But nobody said you couldn’t make your life a perfect world.

You were blind either. And you noticed how Mick was fighting with own arm, like he wanted to put it around you but was containing himself. So pillow after pillow, you broke the wall between you. He didn’t notice immediately, or he was pretending not to see. It wasn’t until you put a hand on his arm that Mick turned his head. “Where is the wall?”

“Destroyed.” you answered with a sweet smile. 

There was something intimate with spending so much time with someone, even through screen. You both could read each other like an open book. And Mick knew that you were waiting for him to make a step, after you made the first one. 

So he did.

He finally let his arm around your shoulder so you could cuddle against him. When he felt like you were comfortable enough, which wasn’t hard because that man was a living pillow, he put his lips on your forehead to kiss you. “Now you don’t have any excuses to start watching horror movies,” he whispered.

But to be fair, you could watch the worst movies in the entire world that it wouldn't matter anymore. Not as long as you have Mick by your side.

#mick schumacher #mick schumacher x you #mick schumacher fanfiction #mick schumacher imagine #mick schumacher x reader #mick schumacher fluff #mick schumacher story #mick schumacher fic #f1 #f1 fanfic #f1 story #f1 imagine #f1 fluff #f1 fic #f1 x reader #my writing

[wolfjackle-creates]

Bring Me Home Arc 2 Part 8

Time for another WIP Wednesday! Hope you enjoy.

Story Summary: Tim and Danny are both neglected by parents who care more about their work than their families. They deal with this by spending too much time online and find each other playing MMORPGs. They keep up their friendship as Tim becomes Robin and Danny becomes Phantom and don't bother keeping secrets from each other.

First, Previous

Word Count: 1.3k

-----

Bart grinned. “Well, we’ll just have to take those odds! So, now that we’ve got the basics down, we’re going out there to help, right?”

Sam snorted. “Not like we could keep Danny out of it if we tried. But you guys don’t have to. You can just go to bed.”

Danny sighed. “School tomorrow is gonna suck.”

Tim shook his head. “Aren’t you gonna call out?”

“No?” replied Danny. “How could I? Mom and Dad would never let me call out just because of some ghosts and they won’t know I’ll have been out all night.”

“Would they even notice if you call yourself out? Or ask Jazz to do it?”

Danny snorted. “School is about the only thing they notice. Look, I’ll be fine. I’ll fall asleep in English. Probably get another detention. I’ve A plusses in algebra and chemistry, so those teachers don’t care when I fall asleep. I’m a known slacker in gym. History is after lunch, so I’ll be able to stay awake for that. I’ve got this. It’ll be fine.”

“Danny…” And here Tim had thought his schooling was a disaster.

“Don’t, Tim. Now,” Danny forced his voice to be more cheerful as he changed the subject, “if you’re all joining me, we’ve got three thermoses. I get one. The rest of you can fight over the other two.”

Tim waved his hand. “I want one!”

Tucker sat down on the floor. “I’m out. Unlike someone, I need to sleep before class in—” he checked his PDA “—seven hours.”

Sam let out a yawn. “Yeah, I’m with Tuck on this one. We’re taking your bed, Danny. When was the last time you changed your sheets?”

Danny shrugged. “Dunno. I think Jazz got to them last week. Or was that the week before?”

“Right. We know where the spares are. Come on, Tuck.”

“Wait, if you’re staying here," said Danny, "any chance you can fix up Cassie, Bart, and Conner’s phone before you go to bed?”

Tucker shrugged. “Sure. Should be able to do at least two of them. You haven’t moved any of the tools, have you?”

“Left some of them out on the desk, but they’re there.”

“All right. Everyone! Pass me your phones. I’ll get at least two of them working tonight.”

Conner passed his over, but said, “Focus on Cassie’s and Bart’s. They’ve more people who will be worried about them and I’ve no doubt Bruce told Clark where I am and he has Tim’s number.”

“Will do!”

Bart handed his over. “Thanks, dude. You really don’t have to if it’s too much trouble.”

“Nah. After how much Danny and I messed with ecto-contaminating electronics, I could do this in my sleep.”

Sam snorted. “Well, if you don’t get started, you’ll be putting that claim to the test. Come on, tech boy. Let’s get going.”

“Sleep well!” Cassie called out after them.

“Don’t let the ghosts bite,” added Danny.

Sam huffed a laugh in a way that told Tim she’d heard the joke more than a few times before. Tucker didn’t even react and just kept walking.

“So…” started Conner once they were alone, “should we suit up?”

Danny hesitated. “If you do, Sam and Tuck will know your identities.”

Everyone looked to Tim. He chewed his lip. On the one hand, Sam and Tucker had known and kept Danny’s secret for months. But they did tend to get in arguments and make problems worse based on storied Danny had shared. But his friends had bonded rather quickly with the Amity trio and Conner, at least, definitely needed more friends their age.

“Our goals for tonight are evacuation and limiting property damage. Ambulances still can’t get into the downtown area and victims can’t escape. They’ll trust us more if we’re in costume. And at the end of the day, people’s safety is the most important. Danny, can you promise me Sam and Tucker can keep our secrets.”

“I promise, Tim. They’ll keep it as well, no better, than mine.”

Tim really hoped he was making the right choice even as he nodded. “Then let’s suit up. Where can we do that unseen?”

“Oh, that part’s easy!” said Danny. “You can change in the spare bedroom and I’ll just fly you all out invisibly and drop you off downtown.”

“Can you carry all of us?” asked Tim. “Have you ever tested your super strength?”

“Kon and I can fly ourselves,” added Cassie. “What do you need to transfer your invisibility?”

“Indirect contact should be fine. So I can carry Tim and Bart and if you each hold hands with one of them, it should work.”

“I don’t like ‘shoulds,’” said Tim. “Let’s test it.”

“Fair enough.” Danny moved until he was standing between Tim and Bart and wrapped an arm around each of them before lifting them into the air.

“Holy shit,” whispered Bart.

Tim couldn’t help but agree. He’d flown many times with Conner or Cassie or even Clark. But it never felt like this. The pull of gravity was always present and something he could feel. Yet with Danny? There was no gravity. Being in the air felt as normal as being on the ground. And Danny’s arm around his chest was warm and solid.

“What?” asked Danny. “Haven’t you flown with one of your teammates before?”

Tim couldn’t hold back a laugh. This was amazing. “Their flight doesn’t entirely cancel out gravity like yours does. Can we go out for fun before we leave? This is beyond anything I’ve ever experienced.”

“Sure thing, Secrets. Whatever you want.”

“Thanks, Polaris.” The news report still playing on the computer brought him back to the present. “But that’s a discussion for later. Sorry for getting distracted. Kon? Cassie? Grab our hands. Let’s see if this works.”

Turned out that not only could Danny make them all invisible and intangible, but his anti-gravity style flight would apply to everyone as well. Apparently flight wasn’t something that required super strength and Tim was definitely updating Danny’s power profile because this was unbelievable. He wanted to run so many tests.

It took five minutes to strip out of their protective gear and turn off the computer, then another ten to change into costume. Most of their bags had been stored in the guest room already.

During that time, Bart claimed the last thermos and they split into teams of two. Robin and Superboy would help ambulances and emergency vehicles get in and out of downtown safely and Impulse and Wonder Girl would help evacuation downtown. Phantom would stay downtown and try to figure out if the portals could be closed preventing more ghosts from crossing over.

Danny went back to his room to grab earpieces that could be used as communicators and ask Sam to turn the ghost shield back on in five minutes, then they were flying back to the scene of the attack.

It felt so much better to be back in costume and ready to do something. Though he was definitely going to have to ask Danny for the specs to the ghost weapons. Next time he came to visit, they’d be in Robin’s colors.

The chaos in the downtown area had gotten much worse in the time they’d been gone sorting out weaponry and plans. Most businesses sported broken windows and cars were overturned on the street. Half the people appeared to be overshadowed and the other half were cowering and hiding.

Danny set them down carefully and Bart immediately disappeared to find those who were trapped.

“I’ll go check out the portal and let you know what I find.”

“Very good, Phantom. We’ll do what we can on the ground. If you see something that needs our attention, let us know.”

Danny gave him a salute. “Will do, Robin.”

“All right, you two ready?”

“Always,” said Conner.

“We’ve faced worse odds,” added Cassie.

“Then let’s get going.” This was going to be a very long night.

-----

Next

Hope you enjoyed! The plot is moving forward slowly but surely. We're still only in the first, like, 3 minutes of the DP episode, so yeah. I may have to speed some things up. I'm just bad at that.

This will be the last week I tag people for updates to this story. There's three reasons for that. Tumblr is making it more difficult to tag users and splitting the list over two posts is kinda a pain. Many people I tag don't seem to interact with the post and I don't know if everyone is still interested in following this story. And I'm nervous about being shadow banned since that's happened to at least one writer in this fandom as I'm sure we all know by now.

So! I've set up a subscription post. Follow the link and set up notifications and I'll make a comment every time I update. That way only those who still want notifications will get them and you can change your mind whenever you want.

Tag List Part 1

@gremlin-bot @bonebrokebuddy @britcision @lady-time-lord- @welcometosasakiworld @akikkobara @phoenixdemonqueen @dolfay @skulld3mort-1fan @we-ezer @markus209 @sjrose1216 @onyxlightdragon @dragonsrequiem @jesus-camp-the-sequel @spidey29phangirl @kyrianclawraith @evilminji @introvert-even-on-the-internet @emergentpanda-blog @lexdamo @v-inari @idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit @longlivethefallen @undead-essence @xye-chan @liandrin @seraphinedemort @kisatamao @schalensitzbucket @caelestisdreamer @runfromthemedic @nutcase8691 @channajen @tonicmii @ambiguouslyominous @vythika96 @addie-lover-of-stories @ironicvixen @violetfox2 @pickleking8 @mysticalcomputerdetective @ark12 @mygood-bitch99 @squirrel-wolf @satisfactionbroughtmeback @sometimesthingsfallapart @automaticsoulharmony @d4ydr34min9 @revnantdpxdclover @midigeria @raginblastocyst @feral-bunny31 @lunaria618 @ghostreblogging @ace-aro-as-shit

#dpxdc #dead tired #tim learns more about danny's powers! #and is realizing he has to make his questions much more specific #because danny will not represent things accurately #sam and tucker go the sane 'we're not super heroes' route and go to bed #tim will never understand

[haknom]

ALONE AT PROM? — NISHIMURA RIKI

PAIRING: playboy!niki x crush-fem!reader

SYNOPSIS: Nishimura Riki, Earl Grey High's most known playboy. He constantly earned the title as ‘who's most likely to become a frat boy’ for the past 2 years and being a senior wouldn’t make a difference. But watching him chase after someone who doesn’t seem to like him back was quite shocking on his end—he never experienced it before. And for his highschool life to be complete, he need to ask you out for prom. Why? Great question. Still, with your frequent ignorance of his presence things only became even harder.

GENRE(S): written series, highschool au, nonidol au, playboy/troublemaker!riki, onesided enemies to lovers, slight sports au, and onesided pinning (for a bit)!

WARNINGS: riki is a homewrecker and is jealous, swearing (i forgot), proofread like half of this, lmk if i missed anything

WORDCOUNT: 1505 words

NOTE: see i was supposed to post this yesterday but i fell asleep and woke up to do hw LMAOO so im posting it now and ill begin writing chapter 4 soon !!! tysm for the support on chapter one im glad u guys enjoy niki being a red flag 😭😭

TAGLIST IS OPEN! 👑 send an ask or reply to be added.

PREV / MLIST / NEXT

CHAPTER TWO. gross, romance.

Physics was never Riki’s strongest subject, and of course, he always took it to his advantage with a sly smile on his face. It was obvious to everyone that he was going after you. Everyone thought you were his next so-called target, but that truly wasn’t the case; at least Riki knew.

He couldn’t help but chase after you as if he were a lost puppy. To be honest, he doesn’t know what caused it. His feelings even took him by surprise. Although the two of you have been attending Earl Grey High for the past three years, he only noticed you during your Junior year. 

Maybe it was the way you smiled at others when walking through the halls or how focused you were trying to unlock your locker—who knows? You still managed to catch Riki’s eye. Since then, he’s always bothered you. You soon began to develop a hatred for the boy due to how much of a disturbance to your studies he could be.

Riki leaned back into his chair, arms crossed over his chest, as he tried his best to listen to the lesson. He really did try, but nothing about Physics sounded interesting to him. Instead, his eyes stayed staring at you, who sat a few seats ahead of him. Through his peripheral vision, he spotted Junghwan, who seemed more annoyed than ever. It left Riki satisfied.

“Alright, please take the rest of the period to work on the assigned sheets. I’ll be collecting them tomorrow.” Mr. Jeong instructed as everyone got to work. Riki grabbed his sheets and phone, leaving his pencil behind on purpose.

Regularly, you would move your desk closer to Junghwan and work together, but today wasn’t the case. As you prepared yourself to push your desk towards his, a taller figure walked right in between you two. “Excuse me,” Riki interrupted, earning scowls from you and Junghwan. He took a seat in front of you with a teasing look all over his face.

“Sorry, am I disrupting something?” He asked even if he didn’t care at all. “You kind of are,” Junghwan informed the boy as Riki shrugged. “Anywho,” He said, staring right at you. “What?” You asked with a vivid, annoyed expression on your face.

“I don’t understand the concept.” Riki rested his arms on top of the seat he sat on, causing the sleeves of his uniform coat to rile up his forearms as you raised a brow at him. “Why is that my problem?” You asked again, your expression never faltering. “I mean, you’re one of the top students in class. Plus,” he said, pointing at the board with writing everywhere. “You’re one of the helpers.” He wasn’t wrong about his words.

You couldn’t say no either. “Fine.” You gave in, earning a slight smile from the boy in front of you. If someone stared hard enough, they could most likely see the tiny hearts forming in his eyes. He was quite literally obsessed. “Where’s your pencil?” Your eyes scanned his closed fists, but no pencil was spotted. “You don’t have one, do you?” He shook his head at your words as you sighed. 

You handed him yours and searched your pencil case for a new one. “Here.” Junghwan handed you a pencil with a loving smile. You returned the smile and took the pencil into your hand, causing Riki to roll his eyes. So what if he was Jealous? “What don’t you understand?” You asked, your eyes meeting his. “Everything.” He replied as your brow furrowed. You sighed, realizing how long this would really take. 

There will most likely be no time to work with Junghwan. Quite sad, but not for Riki. He was glad and internally smiling like a toddler on Christmas morning. This was almost like a blessing for him. All he had to imagine was that you two were alone and on a study date without Junghwan. That wouldn’t be so hard, right?

“See, if I were (Name), I would hate you too,” Jungwon said while kicking at the mini rocks in between the detailing of the bleachers. “I’m being so honest, Jwon, I could treat her way better than Junghoe,” Riki said, adjusting his resting position against the bleachers behind them. “It’s Junghwan. And I highly doubt it.” Jungwon laughed as Riki shrugged. 

“Hear me out. There’s something so suspicious about him.” Riki said. “Or are you just jealous that he’s dating the literal love of your life?” Jungwon asked. “Ouch?” Riki gasped at Jungwon’s words. Was he always this harsh?

The sudden ding that emerged from Riki’s phone caught both of their attention. “Oh, my mom needs something from the store after school,” Riki said, summarizing the message he just received. He looked over at Jungwon while putting his phone away. “Do you want to come?” He asked, but Jungwon shook his head.

“Can’t. I have to study for my math test.” Jungwon answered as Riki sighed. Of course. He nodded at Jungwon’s response and made a mental note to stop at the dollar store after school. “Listen,” Riki started while rising from his spot on the bleachers. 

“If my suspicions end up being right, you owe me one,” Riki said, earning a confused look from Jungwon. “What’s in it for me?” He asked as Riki shrugged. “No clue. What do you want?” Jungwon pondered Riki’s words. What did he want? There was nothing he really needed at the moment. 

“I’ll think about it. Don’t go causing trouble though, remind you, he’s the student president after all.” Jungwon warned. “Okay, okay. I won't trust me.” Riki said with a ‘promising’ smile. “You’re lying, aren’t you?” Jungwon asked as Riki broke character, letting out a teasing smile. Yeah, I am,” Riki said. 

Jungwon softly pushed Riki with narrowed eyes. He knew how much of a rascal Riki could be at times after being around him 24/7. It was only natural for an interaction like this to happen frequently.

Riki pulled his hood over his head and made a knot with the drawstrings. All that could be seen were his eyes. He was truly lucky to have a spare hoodie in his locker to hide his school uniform. The task he was sent to do was quite embarrassing. Nobody could see him buying foot fungus treatment. 

He walked into the dollar store, looking more suspicious than ever. Many would've thought that he was currently on his way to steal, but he wasn’t the type to do that. Yes, he might seem like a bad person and a huge troublemaker, but breaking laws wasn’t something Riki found cool.

He searched the aisles for the item that should not be named. He read every sign, hoping that he would come across it quickly so he could leave quickly. But sadly, to his dismay, his plan wouldn’t work. The good news was that he, sadly, found the correct aisle, but the bad news was even worse. 

The treatment wasn’t in a small box like he expected, instead, it was in a bigger box. One that couldn’t even fit in his pockets. So he panicked. What could he do? They didn’t sell plastic bags, and there was no way he’d have enough money left to buy a reusable one.

He grabbed the box, accepting the fact that his reputation was practically gone. He sighed and made his way to the self-checkout line, hiding the box under the hem of his navy blue hoodie. Yes, he looked suspicious, but hey, at least he’s paying for the item, unlike others. Riki waited for the line to move, him being the next to go as he stared out the windows in the hope that time would move faster if he was distracted. 

The sun was starting to set as its orange gleam rested on the trees and cars that drove past. His eyes scanned the area, reading the random signs he had never noticed before as if they were the most interesting thing in the world, but clearly, there were other things he hadn’t noticed before, like the handholding of a couple who smiled brightly at each other. They were practically sending hearty eyes to one another as the boyfriend landed a kiss on the girlfriend’s forehead. 

Riki rolled his eyes and held back a gag. “Gross, romance.” He mumbled. Yes, he’d been chasing after the same girl for the past year, but it was only fine if he did it. No one else. He even went to a dollar store that was nowhere near his neighbourhood or school. There was no way anyone would see him at this rate—or so he thought.

His eyes narrowed, brows furrowing, as he looked back out the window of the dollar store he stood in. The couple were passing the last window as their faces finally came into view. The orange gleam from the setting sun disappeared for a brief moment, making things even more visible to Riki.

There was absolutely no way he was seeing this right.

TAGLIST BATCH ONE: @soov @redm4ri @ox1-lovesick @urszn @feeeli @hanniluvi @dakkisz @dimplewonie @ddeonudepressions @xiaoderrrr @ja4hyvn @mmaplepastries @essmarye @w3bqrl @jennaissantes @yenqa @yeokii @yyunari @wvnkoi @flwrshee @strwberrydinosaur @gibbysupremeacyisreal @rikizm @teddywonss @whoschr @misokei @forjungwons @sourdiary @ririlovesrenjun @enhaz1 @cha3w0n-hearts @ashy1um @lovelovelovebts @jxp1-t3r @haechansbbg @soobs-things @j-wyoung @en-chantedtomeetyou @dolletesera @im-yn-suckers @imsiriuslyreal @ilychee08 @nishik1 @namdeyoui @lovelovelovebts @jlheon @hueningkslvr @s00buwu @envirae @latriii @beomsbeanie @rikicito @annoyingbitch83 @shawnyle @en-happiness @sungwhoonz (TAGLIST IS OPEN!)

#alone at prom? — ❤️‍🩹 #kpop x reader #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop fluff #enhypen x reader #enhypen #enhypen fluff #niki enhypen #enhypen niki #niki x reader #ni ki x reader #niki #nishimura riki #nishimura riki x reader #enhypen nishimura riki #enhypen ni ki #ni ki enhypen #ni ki #riki x reader #riki enhypen #enhypen riki #enha riki #riki enha #riki fluff #enha x reader #enha fluff #enha #enha niki #niki enha

[phoenix-rising-starbird-one]

I SHOULD BE WORKING ON MY BRADLEY BRADSHAW FIC…. BUT NOooOooOOOOooo

Protective Jake Seresin idea sneaks itself into my brain and now I’m like ANOTHER WIP ADDED AWAY FROM MY BRADLEY BRADSHAW FIC and I’m like for fuck’s sake, brain, why? WHY? PLEASE, PLEASE FINISH ONE STORY! PLEASE! I AM BEGGING YOU TO FOCUS!

Meanwhile my brain is like:

(PS: adding warnings of physical altercation, fight, mentions of abuse)

Jake would be so observant. He’d notice right away that something is off, even if you’re quiet already. It could be the subtlest changes, too. Really, anyone else would probably brush it off as you being your usual introvert self, but Jake would disagree. Cause albeit you being the epitome of introvert, there’s such a thing as being too quiet, even for you, and Jake’s blood boils when he catches glimpses of why, and yeah, he’s this cocky asshole like with the biggest self-important ego a pilot can have, but that doesn’t mean he only cares about himself.

Cause what others see as pompous arrogance and show-off-manship is more like confident determination. Becoming a pilot isn’t an easy feat. You gotta have a competitive and confident streak, or else, you won’t last in Navy Aviation. Anyways, below that arrogance, and kind of mistaken self-importance, is a man whose mama raised him right! And she would absolutely smack him over the head if she found out he was looking the other way just because it’s easier to look the other way than step up, right? Because it’s not his problem, right?

But his mama raised a man with some solid core values (and yeah, maybe he hasn’t always lived up to those but when push comes to shove, Jake always does the right thing!), and it’s a fucking flash how it all happens. One second, he’s behind the pool table, looking out the window. And he’s not sure. He’s not 100% sure. But then he remembers that you’ve started wearing long sleeved t-shirts. In fucking California? And that man out there, the one you’re looking at with wide terror-filled eyes, is grabbing your arm a little too harshly for Jake’s liking. And then it’s a fucking flash. One second, Jake is behind the pool table and the next, the Daggers are running after Jake who is sprinting outside, not even waiting for Bob to actually catch the queue that Jake throws off to the side.

And then it’s sand and dust in the air, and for a moment, the Daggers have no fucking clue what is happening. All they hear is Jake growling as he spits out “How does it feel, huh? How does it feel to go against someone your own fucking size? Not a man now, are you?” And it takes Javy and Bradley and Fanboy to drag Jake off whoever he is pummeling into the ground, and to hold him back while Mav gives this stranger an ice-cold glare while Bob and Natasha wrap you in a hug and turn you away. “Don’t you ever lay a hand on her again! You hear me!” Jake yells over his shoulder as the group pulls him back into the Hard Deck, still in a three-to-one hold on Jake.

And your now ex could call the cops. He really could. Jake left his lip split and other parts bruised. But your ex has this feeling that no one will have seen a thing. One thing’s for certain. You never see your ex again after that. But Jake comes around the office often and it’s not just to debrief with the higher ups. “You look good.” Jake smiles softly when he sees you wear a cap-sleeved blouse. And yeah, you’re still quiet. That’s not gonna change. But your eyes are bright when you return his smile with one of your own, a soft “thanks” in tow. And just as Jake gets called into office, he hands you a small paper bag. “Your favorites.” He winks, catches the smile when you pull two cookies from the bag just before he closes the door.

(I was thinking of making this introvert reader who is the private secretary of one of the higher ups, not necessarily Admiral Simpson. But she’s a civilian… and my brain won’t stfu cause ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… someone tell me to not write this! Tell me to focus on my other WIPs, of which I have… wait, gotta check… 81! EIGHTY-FUCKING-ONE WIPS! CRIES IN WRITER!)

#jake seresin #jake hangman seresin #top gun maverick #glen powell #omg please send help cause why brain WHY!! #writing #vonny’s ideas

[justmeinadaze]

I'm In Control Part 23 (Steddie X You)

A/N: I bare you...the conclusion! I am more than happy to return to these three if I or y'all come up with ideas :)

Warnings: Daddy Steve and Sir Eddie and all that implies (I regret nothing!), Eddie gets spicy in this one. Him and the reader fight, Smut, angst, and fluff :)

Word Count: 3331

“Steve! Eddie! No!”

You try and stop them but they are on a mission, eyes dark with anger, and lost in that protective mindset as they charge into TJ’s office. 

“You can’t do this to her. She’s the best agent you have.”, Steve sternly points his index at the man. “If you need to fire anyone, fire us. She deserves to be here.”

“You’re right.”, TJ sighs. “You’re absolutely right but imagine being on the outside looking in? Can you three prove to me she didn’t give you priority roles? That anything within this past year was done purely off of profession and not just because she’s dating you?”

“You know she wouldn’t do that. You’ve known her longer than we have.”, Eddie defends. 

“And those concerns are just from the outside. Since you two have become her clients, you three disappeared constantly, you walked out of a shoot last week—”

“We told you about that immediately.”

“Tell me, Steve. If you hadn’t been dating Y/N, would you both have done the job?”

“No.” When he responded with zero hesitation, your heart swooned. “Cassie Leigh is a fucking terrible person.”

“Angel…”, TJ turns to you. “I know you. They are right about that but…this looks really bad from a professional standpoint.”

“I know…”

“Plus, I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I was hurt you hid this from me.”

“I never expected this, TJ. I swear. It just—”

“I know. That’s why…”, he turns back to the boys. “She’s only suspended WITH pay. I need to think some things through and figure out what’s best.”

“If she goes, we go.”, Eddie announces as Steve nods. 

“No, they don’t.” They both angrily turn their heads towards you. “This company still has your best interest in mind. Just…stay until we get this sorted out, ok?”

###########

It had been two weeks since you were suspended and it was killing you. Not just because you missed the job but because you saw it torturing the guys to. They felt like this was their fault and constantly apologized every time they caught you zoning out or hiding your tears. 

Moving in with them helped ease some of that tension especially since now that they weren’t seeing you at work every day at least they got to come home to you. They hated the agent TJ assigned them. He was one of those cocky, slick types that felt like the world centered around them. To him they were just cash machines and pushed them towards any project that was sent his way without even discussing it with them. 

Thankfully, Luke’s show had started filming again so they were able to focus all their energy there when they weren’t focused on you. 

While you were browsing through job ads, you phone rang, giving you pause when you noticed the number. 

“Hey TJ.”

“Y/N, angel…we have a problem. Eddie got arrested on Luke’s set today.”

“He what?!”, you shouted as you got up searching for your shoes. “Where’s Steve?”

“He’s at the station in the process of bailing him out. I’m trying to talk Michael into not pressing charges… talk to them, Y/N. They are out of control.”

##############

“What the fuck happened?!” You scream at them as soon the enter the front door. Eddie ignores you as he swishes past to grab a beer from the fridge. Steve sighs as he watches him, folding his arms across his chest. 

“To be fair, I almost knocked the son of bitch out myself. Eddie just got there first.”

“Steve, don’t play games with me. What. HAPPENED?!”

“We went to Michael’s office today because he said he found us job. When he went into more detail, we… we told him it wasn’t something we would be comfortable with. He kept pushing so…”, he gestures to Eddie. 

“So, you punched him in the face because you didn’t agree with him?” The metalhead continues not to answer as he glares into the void and chugs down more of his beverage. “You both have had disagreements with me but you’ve never taken a swing at me.”

“This was different.”

“How, Steve?! How was it different?” You angrily turn towards Eddie. “And why are you letting him speak for you again?!”

You’d be lying if you didn’t say the eyes that met yours scared you a bit. “Get out of my face, Y/N. I’m not in the mood.”

Trying to regain your composure, you reached to caress his face but he swiftly grabbed your wrist and pushed you backwards, knocking you into Steve’s chest. The man’s arms swiftly shot out to catch you, looking down to make sure you were ok. 

When you saw Daddy reflecting back, you tried to reel him in and assure him. “Steve, no. It’s ok. I’m alright.” It was too late. All he saw was his baby girl that he needed to remind was safe. 

“Eddie, we don’t do that. Apologize to her. Now.”

The boy chuckled sarcastically under his breath as he rose to his feet and turned to face him. “Steven Harrington, you are not my Daddy. I do not belong to you and you do NOT tell me what to fucking do.”

“Eddie…”, you squeak. 

“Now YOU belong to me and as your Master, I’m telling you to shut your fucking mouth!”

“No. Right now, you are not my Master. My Sir is a confident, powerful, sexy man that I fell in love with. At this moment, all I see is an angry, pathetic little boy!”

“What the fuck did you just say to me, little girl?!”

As Eddie stepped forward so did Steve pushing you behind him. “No! We do NOT play when our emotions are heightened, right? Answer me, Ed!”

The metalhead glared between the two of you before reaching to grab his jacket. “Fuck you both.”, he spits as he heads out the front door.

##############

Eddie didn’t come home that night and it tore you apart. You knew he wasn’t thinking clearly and all you wanted was for him to be alright. After Steve told you the whole story, you decided to focus on something you could control as you sped to the agency. He tried to stop you but you were furious busting into TJ’s office with a loud bang as you slammed open the door.

“You said they were out of control. Did you know he tried to force them to do a shoot they were uncomfortable with?! They told him no but he signed them up anyway. TJ, they’ve stated numerous times, they don’t feel comfortable doing BDSM type work for the camera!”

“Y/N, listen to me—”

“No! You listen to me. This is unacceptable even if I wasn’t dating them and you know it. I’m not going to let anyone drag down their careers that they worked so hard for! There’s a reason they’ve gotten this far and it’s because they do what works for them. Michael should have trust their intuition and even if he didn’t, he had no right signing their names for a job!”

“He did what?! Y/N, I didn’t know that.”

“No, you didn’t because you are so focused on how people could possible view our relationship that you didn’t notice things that were actually happening…”, you sigh as you fold your arms over your chest. 

“That right there is why she’s a good agent.” You jump when you hear Steve’s behind you as he enters TJ’s office. “And it’s not because she’s fucking us or the fact that we are in love with her. She pays attention and actually fucking cares about the people she represents.” 

TJ sighs as he places his hands on his hips. “Angel, I’m not going to hire you back.” Your heart breaks as you nod and hang your head. “I’m not going to hire you back because you’re too good for this place.” He smiles when your eyes look up to find his. “I’ve taught you everything you know and then some. The rest is all you, babe. You deserve to run them and anyone else without a big boss hanging over you.”

You tackle him as your arms wrap around his neck. “Jesus Christ!”, he chuckles. “I’ll give you a month’s pay till you really get going. I’m not calling it severance because you’re not fired. You’re just…moving on to better things.”

##############

“Baby, stop.” Steve reaches over and places his hand over your knee that hadn’t stopped bouncing since you both got back home. 

“Steve, I can’t…I’m worried about him. What if he got hurt or something? This isn’t like him—”

The front door opened as Eddie slunk in, his hair hanging heavily over his face. You jumped up from the couch, running to him, and immediately wrapped your arms around his waist. His arms stayed at his sides as he remained stiff in your embrace. 

You pulled away, giving him a once over to make sure he wasn’t hurt before you abruptly reached out and shoved his chest. 

“Where the fuck have you been?! I have been worried sick! You didn’t come home last night! You won’t answer your phone! Talk to me, Eddie!”

Steve was standing off to side as he kept a careful eye on you both. You gently pushed his hair back so you could look at his face. His vacant eyes continued to stare past you into the floor. 

“Eddie?” He suddenly fell to his knees, pressing his face into your stomach as he began to cry. His fingers dug into your back as you hugged his head tightly to you. “Eddie, please. Talk to me.” You glanced at Steve, silently begging for help. 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

“Baby—”

“No!” He leans back as he looks up at you. “No, I’m so sorry. I…I…that fucking asshole pissed me off and then getting arrested…I wasn’t in the right place mentally. I never should have talked to you like that or pushed you. You were right. I’m a fucking pathetic, little boy.”

“Eddie, it’s ok.”

“Jesus, Y/N!”, he rises to his feet causing the other boy to move closer to you. “It’s not ok! I saw the way you looked at me! You were scared… I—”

Your palm collided with his cheek. “You’re going to hear what I have to say! Do you understand me?!” His eyes searched yours before slowly descending back to his knees. 

“Yes, Miss.”

You cupped his face with your hands as you stepped closer. “You’re right. You shouldn’t have behaved that way but Eddie, that’s not normal behavior for you. I knew something was wrong and when Steve told me what happened… I wanted to fucking hit him to. He violated a boundary for you; for both of you. Baby, I am so fucking sorry you went through that but that’s never going to happen again.”

“She’s our agent again. Seems baby girl is starting her own agency.”

Eddie’s eyes shift between you both as what Steve said fully sunk in. You smile as you pull him to his feet. “You’re safe with me, Sir, and I am safe with you. Just don’t fucking disappear me on again.” You hug him again and this time his arms wrap around you. “I was so worried.”

“I’m sorry, princess. Can I make it up to you?”

“Please.”

He grinned as he lifted you into his arms and headed for the bedroom. “Come on, Harrington. You to.”

“Me? What do I need to make up for?”

“Fine. Stay out here then.”

“Nooo…”, you whine as you make grabby hands, reaching for him to follow. 

Steve laughs at the sound as he trails behind and Eddie tosses you on to the bed, climbing on top of you as he kisses your neck. As soon as you lift off your shirt, his mouth descends to your chest, reaching behind you to take off your bra. Your legs wrap around his waist trying to keep him as close to you as you possibly can. 

“I missed you so much. It—mmm—it felt weird without you next to me last night.”

Eddie’s lips encase your nipple, his finger trying to unbutton your pants while grinding against you. 

“Where did you sleep last night?”, Steve asked. 

“Van.” His mouth dipped along your stomach, tugging your jeans and panties with him down your legs. 

“Eddie…” You felt a pang in your heart of him sleeping in his van out on L.A. streets, leaning up to quickly grab his chin after he took off his shirt. “Promise me you’ll never do that again. Even if you don’t feel comfortable talking to me at least tell Steve where you are.”

He saw the hurt in your eyes and it killed him all over again as he leaned forward to gently kiss your forehead. “I promise, little miss.” Eddie guided you back down with soft kisses before making you giggle as he playfully lifted your legs, yanking you closer to him.

A moan escaped you as his tongue licked a stripe through your folds. He moved slow at first, his mouth pressed just so against you but when Eddie got going it was like being transported to another world. You always loved the way he felt with his head between your legs. Unlike Steve, when the metalhead got passionate, he was still coherent and controllable but he was very focused and determined. He had one goal and it was to please you. 

Your eyes squeezed shut as his lips wrapped around your clit, two of his thick fingers breaching your entrance as he pumped and curled them inside of you. You suddenly felt warmth press against your side and whimpered when you felt lips suck on your neck. 

“Daddy…” 

Steve’s hand caressed your skin, his fingers stopping to play with your erect nipples making your pussy clench around Eddie who had begun thrusting his own digits faster into you. 

“Please…fuck…Sir, yes. Just like…like that. I…need you…please, Eddie.”

At the sound of his name, he crawled up to your side and attached his lips to the opposite end of your neck as his hand moved faster between you. 

“Cum, baby. You deserve to feel good. Come on, pretty girl.” His soft, syrupy voice continued to encourage you until your hand shot down clasping over his as you came. 

“Atta girl, honey. Such a good girl.”, Steve whispered as Eddie sat up to throw off his pants. 

You rolled the other boy onto his back, smiling to see he was already undressed and waiting for his turn. Hovering over his firm cock, you glided your tongue over the tip, tasting the salty pre cum he already had lingering there. 

Eddie came up behind you, adjust your hips and pushing one of your legs further up the mattress to he could have better access. You both groaned as he guided his dick into your dripping core, delivering slow, strong strokes as he pushed deeper into you. One of his hands clung to your hip as the other balanced on the side of the bed while his chest hovered just above your back as he watched you bob your head around his friend’s cock. 

Steve mewled as he brushed your hair to side so they could both watch you take him. The vibrations from mouth as Eddie thrust harder into you had his eyes rolling back. 

“F-fuck, baby girl. I can fucking feel the back of your throat. You take us both so…so well.”

You lifted your head for air, panting as the metalheads fingers slide around your thigh to reach your pussy, massaging circles against your clit. 

“Yes, Sir. Jesus…that feels…”

“Tell me, princess. Tell me—mmm—how it feels.”, Eddie cooed.

“So deep…amazing…f-faster, please.”

You spit over Steve’s length, stroking him rapidly as the other man placed both palms on your side, balancing more on his knees as his own hips pounded into you at a dizzying pace. 

Craning to face him, your eyes met his as his mouth fell open in silent moans. 

“Can…can I cum, Sir?”

As soon as he nodded, your eyes fluttered closed, your forehead falling against Steve’s body as you came. Eddie’s arms wrapped around your front, holding you to his chest as he rolled his hips aggressively until you heard a strangled grunt and felt him warm your insides with his release. 

The delicate action of him pulling out of you was countered with Steve leaning over and lifting you onto his lap. You reached between your bodies, taking his cock and sliding it into your core. His hands clung to your waist as you began bouncing on top of him, your head flying back in ecstasy. 

Leaning back on your hands, you grind your lower half against him as Steve tilts forward to trail his lips along your stomach up to your chest making you whimper.

“Yes, Daddy. Ma-make me cum, baby.”

Abruptly, he wraps his arms around you, flipping you onto your back as your head hits Eddie’s tummy. 

“Ow.”

You giggle as the other man smiles down at you, kissing your lips as he thrusts into you. The metalhead’s fingers run through your hair as Steve’s forehead leans against yours, his breathy whimpers fanning your face. 

“Just like…that, Steve. Please. I’m…fuck…can I?”

He nodded as his rhythm quickened, the sound of skin hitting skin filling the room until your eyes closed and you clung to the back of his head as you came. As your pussy fluttered around him, you heard him groan above you as he pumped rope after rope of his spend deep inside of you.

Nobody moved except for Eddie who was still tenderly petting your head. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N.”

“Eddie, you don’t have to keep apologizing.”

“No, I know. I just…this wasn’t really a great welcome home experience for you. I don’t want you to think this is common. Matt said this was a big step for you.”

You poke at Steve’s back as he jokingly whines, rolling off you before you turn around and climb on top of the other boy. 

“I know this isn’t normal for you. I don’t…I don’t think you’re both going to suddenly change just because I’m here. Not in a bad way anyway.”, you smile. “He knows it’s a big step for me because I was terrified to leave home after I graduated high school. It was all I ever wanted but I was so scared of being in this ‘sinful city’ alone. Then I dated those douchebags and…” He chuckles as you shake your head and shudder. “I guess what I’m trying to say is, I never would have moved in if I didn’t trust you both. All three of us have come a long way from that night in the hotel. This one…setback…doesn’t ruin the idea of me being here.”

Eddie’s palms cup your face as he guides your lips to his. 

“Now your careers…that’s a different story.” You smile as Steve comes up behind you lifting you off the boy with one arm and carries you to the bathroom. 

“Why do you say that?”, the metalhead asked as he jogged up behind you two. 

“If word got around that you punched an agent and got arrested that doesn’t look so hot but I think I can spin it especially since Michael dropped the charges.

“Jesus, woman. What voodoo did you do?”

“She yelled at TJ and told him what that asshole did. TJ said if he dropped the assault charge, he wouldn’t fire him for signing our names.”, Steve grinned as he guided you under the warm water of the shower. 

“Which technically he didn’t. He still works for the agency…he’s just not an agent anymore.”, you beam up at him as you wrap your arms around his neck. 

“So…you’re really our agent again?”

You kiss his lips before leaning back against Steve’s chest.

“Yup. I’m in control of you and all yours.”

#############

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[leewriting]

Things that matter more

Roommate au Mafia au

Roommates to lovers

Jungkook x reader

At first, getting a new roommate after your friend had moved out appalled you. Just thinking about sharing your space with a stranger put you on edge, but as the weeks went by and the rent went up you had no other choice but to post that stupid ad. In many ways living with Jungkook is perfect for an introverted med student like yourself. He pays rent on time and is seldom home leaving the apartment quiet and clean. On the other hand, there is the small problem of him stumbling in at three in the morning, hurt and letting blood stain your new carpet.

Wordcount:32k

Warnings: Mentions of death, abuse and dead bodies, blood and injuries, angst

A/N, okay so I have become so attached to this story. I hope you all love it as much as I do. Please let me know what you think by commenting. I love you all and I hope you enjoy the story. 

—-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I hate you.” You glare. You can feel the absolute rage build up inside you until you finally explode and hit the stupid printer.  It still doesn’t want to print your assignment. 

“Okay, I’m sorry I promise I won’t do that again.” you plead, close to tears. “But it is kind of your own fault.” You bite your lip, are you really trying to gaslight your printer? 

“Okay you win, see” you start backing up, hands held in front of you. “I’m going to leave, and we can try and work this out when I get back.” You turn and retreat from your room. 

You sigh. Okay, maybe you’ve finally gone crazy, but you are at your wit's end. You need to have this printed before tomorrow because your professor apparently still lives in the dark ages and wants everything to be submitted in hard copy. 

It’s 3 am and the apartment is dark and silent. You feel a tingle travel down your spine and you race down the hallway for the light switch next to the front door. 

Breathing a sigh of relief with the lights officially on, you turn to the kitchen ready for a cup of coffee. But you freeze when you see the figure standing behind the island. The scream leaves your throat before you have a chance to think. 

The man in your kitchen swirls around and your scream dies down immediately. It’s just Jungkook. 

Jungkook your roommate for the past 6 months is home earlier than you expected. He must have gotten off early from work.  You’re not sure what his job is, hell you’re not even sure what his middle name is or if he even has one for that matter. He showed up at your doorstep after you posted the ad. At first, you were apprehensive of course about him being a man and all, but you didn’t really have another choice unless you wanted to live with Becky a girl you can’t stand, so you agreed. 

Living with him is much better than you expected, he cleans up after himself, and as mentioned he is almost never home meaning you get the rent paid without having to deal with petty roommate drama. It’s a win-win situation. 

“You okay?” Jungkook asks his eyebrow raised and surveying you after your little freak out.

You blush, feeling foolish. “Yes, sorry I didn’t know you were here.” You look away trying to come off nonchalant even though your heart is still racing from the fright you had. 

“Well, I do live here you know.” He smirks, pouring milk into a glass. 

“Yeah, I never see you so I forget.” You blurt out. You didn’t mean to say that. You guess your mouth is just running away on its own now. Maybe there is a medical condition for it. You should look it up, you bet it’s called being stupid and unable to function late at night without coffee. 

He just hums and nods, taking a sip of his milk, not bothered by your statement. 

“Why were you in the dark anyway?” You ask, realising how weird it is that he didn’t turn on a light. 

“Working on my night vision.” He smirks and struts to his door. “Goodnight.” He gives a little wave before closing his room door behind him. 

You stand there confused for a moment but you brush it off. It’s not unusual, this is how most of your conversations with him go. He always dodges questions with strange remarks. However, you still have a good relationship, maybe it’s more like a common understanding that just because you live together means you can be acquaintances without being friends.

Making friends with people isn’t really your strong suit. Mostly you feel too uncomfortable in social situations to really talk to others, and when you do start talking most people tend to stare at you as if you grew a second head. Someone once told you your sense of humour is apparently off-putting, whatever that means. Mostly you say the wrong things at the wrong time when meeting someone so you shy away from situations with strangers. 

That’s why you don’t really try too hard to get to know Jungkook. You feel it’ll only make things more awkward if he knew that his roommate is an awkward human who thinks talking about true crime is the epitome of conversation.

You head to the kitchen still in thought, and magically you’re able to make yourself coffee without burning your hand off with boiling water. It’s a real accomplishment at this time of night.

You sit on the couch for a bit, rejoicing in the silence around you before you hear the printer you were abusing finally coming to its senses and doing its job. With a sigh you place your cup in the sink and head back to your room, only to find your papers scattered across the floor as the printer keeps spitting out more. 

“Fuck” You groan out in irritation and you swear you hear a giggle coming from the room next door. 

.

.

.

“He chopped up his victims and buried them in the woods near his house.” The true-crime podcast is playing in the background while you make notes. You’re up later than usual, much later, but you need to get these notes done before class tomorrow. 

You hear the front door creak open. You immediately stop what you’re doing, pausing the podcast in the process. You sit in silence waiting for the tell-tale sign of Jungkook walking to his room. The shoes he wears always make enough noise to be able to track every step. You once told him he can probably kick someone unconscious with his shoes. He only responded with a smirk. 

You don’t hear him at all and you’re getting paranoid now. Maybe listening to a true crime podcast this time of night isn’t such a good idea as you thought it would be. You take a deep breath in, deciding what to do. You reach for your phone and dial Jungkook’s number. 

He once told you that if there was ever an emergency you should call him. You scoffed at the time but now you hope that he counts a possible murderer as one of those emergencies. You press the phone to your ear but frown when you hear his ringtone blast through the apartment. You swear he is the only person you know who doesn't have his phone on silent all the time.

You get up hesitantly when he doesn't pick up. You follow his ringtone to the living room and freeze. 

There on the floor laying face down on the new rug is your roommate. You frown as the weird red tye-dye on his shirt seems to be spreading onto said rug. Your eyes grow wide as the realisation hits you. It’s not tye-dye it’s fucking blood!

You rush to his side. 

“Jungkook!” He groans, at least he is still awake, “Hey can you hear me?” 

“No.” He groans out and you would have laughed if he wasn’t currently possibly bleeding out. 

“What happened? Is there someone in the apartment?” Your frenzied mind immediately goes back to your suspicions of a murderer.

“No.” He says again and you feel a bit relieved even if he isn’t answering your first question. 

“Okay, I need you to turn around.” You try to roll him over but it’s only with his help that you manage. You never guessed all that muscle would make him this heavy. 

“Uhm okay…” Your hands hover over his torso. His entire shirt in the front is soaked with blood and he is too pale for your liking. “Okay, this is fine.” 

You pull up his shirt and gasp at the cut on his side. “Okay, maybe this is not fine.” Your breath is haggard as panic sets in, but just as it does the med-student in you take over. This is just another emergency patient right? You can treat this, you’ve done it before. Just not alone without a supervisor to step in if you mess up, and not without the proper supplies. Still, you know what to do at least.

You pull your shirt over your head and press it onto the wound, making him wince. You press down hard but realise all your supplies are in your room. 

“Okay Jungkook here.” You try to say it as calmly as possible, while you move his hand over yours. “Press hard okay.” You instruct and hope that he heard you because you’re up and running immediately. 

You fly into your room and snatch up your first aid kit before you sprint back, sliding on your knees to him in your panic. Your skin burns from the friction, but you don’t have time to look. 

You rip open your med kit and replace Jungkook’s hand on the cloth that was once your favourite baggy shirt. You cautiously lift it up and breathe out a sigh of relief when you see the bleeding has stopped. 

“You’re okay, I’m okay we are all going to be okay,” you ramble while you pack out your supplies. 

“That is very reassuring.” Jungkook jokes and you stare. 

“How can you joke right now?” You almost scream out.

Jungkook rolls his eyes. “It’s not that bad.” 

“Not that bad…are you looking at it?” Your eyes are wide while you survey his much too calm face. Why does he almost look used to this? “ Nevermind don’t look.” You’re afraid he’ll start panicking if he does.

You wet gauze with disinfectant. “ This is going to sting.” You warn him before pressing the gauze to the cut. He immediately groans and grabs your arm trying to stop you, before he realises what he’s doing and lets it go again. 

Once clean, you can get a good look at the wound. If you had to guess he tried to dodge whatever it was by turning out of the way. Clearly, it didn’t work and now you have no choice.

“It’s going to need stitches.” You bite your lip.

“Great then get on with it please.” 

“Get on with… Jungkook stitches.” You repeat yourself sure he didn’t hear. “ As in threading a needle through your skin and I don’t have any numbing agent.” 

“Is your bedside manner always this calming?” He hisses through his teeth in pain.  Your eyes are wide, and he sighs when he looks at your face. “Just do it okay, I can take it.” 

You nod and bite your lip before threading the needle. 

Throughout the procedure, he lies as still as possible but his constant wincing and the few whimpers that escape his clenched jaw give away that he is in pain. Overall you just try to work as fast as possible. For the first time, you’re glad for all the times your professor made you redo your stitches because now you at least know that you’re doing it right.

“Alright all done, let me just wrap you up.” You state after a few moments, snipping the thread. You place all your now blood soaked tools on the coffee table, you’ll clean it up later,  and come back with gauze and bandages. 

Jungkook is still breathing heavily from the stitches sitting up a bit now. As soon as you start wrapping the bandages you can’t stop your eyes from wandering. Yes, he has a nice body but the thing that makes you almost gasp is all the healed scars. The faint white lines contrast with his skin. Your curiosity about the situation is spiked.

“Ouch.” Jungkook let’s slip when you finish tying the bandage. 

“Sorry.” You apologise. For the first time, you survey him further. His torso is bruised badly, and for a moment you wonder if his ribs are damaged. His cheekbone is blossoming with purple hues and his lip is split, dried with blood. You sigh and pick up a gauze pad wetting it with the disinfectant.

“What are you doing?” Jungkook asks, leaning back until his back meets the wall while you lean forward, the gauze held up in your hand. 

“Will you please just hold still.” He hesitates long enough for you to press the gauze against his lip. 

“Ouch.” 

“Sorry.” You scoot closer to him so that you have more control and he looks at you. 

“Thank you.” He says it softy and you nod, trying not to look at his intense staring eyes, you rather concentrate on his lip, dabbing it lightly with the gauze.

“Y/n” He encases your wrist with his hand making you stop and look at him in surprise. He is frowning slightly.

“Really thank you.” His face softens as he says the words, truly meaning them. Your brain struggles to come up with a reply but your mouth is clearly not affected.

“It’s a pleasure, I’m just really glad you didn’t die. I don't know how I would have gotten rid of your body.”  You immediately mentally cringe. You always make stupid jokes like this in awkward situations. You had to learn to stop yourself for hospital practicals, but clearly, your training isn’t helping now.

Jungkook stares at you in shock and you’re just about to apologise when he starts laughing, wincing a bit but continuing. 

“Yeah, I doubt you would have been able to drag me to the woods to bury me.” His reply surprises you, most people rarely appreciate your sense of humour.

“No, I would have probably had to chop you up.” You wait for his response, you’re sure he will change the topic but he just laughs again.

“O yeah, serial killer style okay.” He nods as if in thought and you frown, laughing at the twist the conversation has taken. “I don’t think that would be the best way though.” 

“O and why not?” You have no idea why you feel defensive about the way you would dispose of a dead body.

“Because the mess would be way too much,” He says it so calmly, “Imagine the cleaning. You would definitely not get your deposit back on this place.” He grimaces at the idea and you laugh.

“You’re probably right,” You cave. “I’ll be sure to ask your advice if I ever need to hide a body.” 

“I am nothing if not helpful.” He jokes. 

You’ve never seen him smile this much, come to think of it you’ve barely seen him smile at all. It suits him, especially when his eyes crinkle up and his front teeth show the way it is doing now. 

“Jungkook?” His name calls his attention to you immediately. You know it’s probably overstepping a boundary but you just feel like you need to know. “What happened?” 

His face goes blank for a moment. He clears his throat. “ I was mugged.” 

You don’t believe him, it sounds almost practised. He also doesn’t meet your eyes completely, but overall you can’t be sure he is lying. You don't know his tells, hell you don’t even really know him. 

“I’m sorry that happened. I’m glad you’re safe.” You don’t push and you can see he appreciates it. If he was really mugged he probably doesn’t want to talk about it.

A lull falls over you two. You play with the gauze stretching it apart. You mentally chastise yourself. You just had to go and ruin the moment with your curiosity. 

“I’m sorry.” He breaks the silence.

“Huh?” You frown at him and you stare even harder when you see his cheeks becoming a pinkish shade. At least you know he has enough blood to blush. 

“I’m sorry about the rug.” He motions with his head to the big red stain on your once pretty rug. You can’t make him feel bad about it though.

“It’s okay, I like modern art anyway.” You awkwardly chuckle trying to reassure him, but when you see he is biting his lip still staring at the stain you sigh. 

“You can make it up to me okay?” You say patting his shoulder. The movement feels very weird, out of place for some reason. 

You watch his face morph into one of exhaustion very quickly. The adrenaline finally wearing off. 

“I think you should go rest.” You say in your best doctor voice. Jungkook shows no resistance and just nods before slowly getting up, wincing with every movement and holding onto his injured side but he refuses your help. 

You follow him to his room door. You worry that he’ll tear the stitches or what if you did it wrong and he bleeds out during the night? He turns around to face your anxious form. 

“I’ll be fine Y/n don’t worry.” He says as if reading your mind. 

“Call me if anything happens okay.” You get a nod in return heading to your own room, hearing his door close behind you. 

Once in the comfort of your room, you take a second to process what happened, leaning against your door and counting the events on your fingers. 

One, you had treated your first patient by yourself.

Two, unfortunately, it happened to be your mysteriously bleeding roommate at 3 in the morning, 

Three, afterwards, you had the longest and weirdest conversation you’ve ever had with him.

And four, apparently, as you move further into your room and catch sight of yourself in the mirror, you did all this in your bra.

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.

The morning light creeps into your room much faster than you feel necessary. Your head feels groggy as if every thought has to trek through mud to make an appearance. You rub your eyes and slowly open them, only to groan at the onslaught of the sunlight on your eyes. 

You sit on the bed for another second, before the desire for coffee drags you out of it. You swing your body to the side standing up only to stumble. Why do your knees hurt so much? 

You rack your brain for the possible reason for the bruises on them. You try to recall what happened last night before you .

You were making your notes when… o shit Jungkook.

You hurriedly walk out of your room, stopping at his door. You listen intently for any sign of him being in there, but you're only met with silence. Maybe you should go in, but you feel like that would be crossing a line, and you’re sure that if something was wrong he would have called for you. Or well you hope he would. So instead you continue to the kitchen.

Your sight is set on the coffee maker, it shines like a glowing beckon for your tired brain. You reach for it turning it on when you suddenly stop and backtrack. There on the black counter is one of your favourite cups filled with now lukewarm coffee. The coffee however isn’t what makes you smile. It’s the sticky note stuck to it. The letters were clearly written carefully, forming two words. Thank you.

You remove the neon pink note and stick it on the wall where it contrasts nicely with the white tile.

You wonder where your roommate is, it feels too quiet in the apartment for him to be home. Usually, there would be noise coming from his room. Games or something, but now there is absolute silence, which means he’s probably not home. You know he didn’t die through the night though because the coffee isn’t cold, so there is that to at least calm your anxious mind. You just hope that wherever he is, he is not tearing his stitches.

You take a sip of the coffee and wrinkle your nose at the bitter liquid. You can’t blame him that he doesn’t know to put sugar in your coffee. You drink it nonetheless, you can’t have the gesture go to waste. 

You smile as you catch sight of the note again, picking up a sticky note, from the pile you usually use for grocery lists you write a quick “my pleasure” on it. Something feels missing though, so without thinking about it twice you add a small “Don’t die” at the bottom, hoping he would appreciate it. You stick it on his bedroom door to make sure he sees it as you head past to get dressed because you just realised that you are late, very late. 

You don’t think you’ve ever gotten ready so fast. Your exciting 3 am seemed to have impacted your sleep a little bit too much and now you’re going to be late for class if you don’t leave. You barely remember to lock the door. Your last thought before you rush to the elevator is that Jungkook better not bleed out through the day.

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.

“No mom I’m fine, I just had a bad day.” You have your phone pressed between your ear and your shoulder as you talk to your mom while walking through the aisles of the convenience store. 

“No, there is nothing you can do mom, I’m just getting chocolate, and then heading home.” You bend down finally finding what you were looking for. 

You had a very bad day, classes have been killing you inside, and today of all days your professor just had to call on you with a question you didn’t know the answer to. The embarrassment and your group’s decision to work on an assignment till late have mixed together to make you feel drained and just completely over today. 

“Yeah, I’ll be safe,” You pack your things on the counter for the cashier to ring up. “Okay love you too.” You finally hang up. You don’t know how your mom just knew to call you but hearing her voice made you feel better. 

“Bad day?” The man asks you while packing everything into a bag for you.

“That obvious huh?” You ask handing over the money. 

“The amount of chocolate might have given it away.” He smiles and you blush and nod taking the bag that he hands over. 

“Hey if you’re not busy later,” He continues before you can leave. “Maybe I can try to make your day better.” 

You stare at him shocked, did he just ask you out on a date? 

“O, uhm…” You’re not sure what to say, obviously you don’t want to go out with him but you don’t know how to turn him down. 

“It’s alright I think the uhm… chocolate will do the job.” You say awkwardly, “Besides I can’t tell if you're an axe murderer.” He stares at you and you cringe inwardly, that might not have been the best way to turn him down. You guess after all the joking with Jungkook you forgot how people react when you say things like that. 

So leaving the situation you turn and walk out the door without waiting to see if he’ll reply. 

Blushing hard you walk down the street. How do some people react so well to your humour and others just don’t? Or well you guess only one person reacts well. But you mean you do have a point, he could be a serial killer or something, maybe it just wasn’t the best thing to say it out loud, to his face.

It’s already dark, but your apartment is only a block away so you decide to just walk instead of waiting for a bus. It’s a nice night out, not too hot or cold and the fresh air isn’t something you get enough of, so you continue down the street. 

There aren’t many people out and soon a strange feeling of being watched takes over you. You turn around to look behind you but there is only a couple following you down the sidewalk. You breathe out, nothing to worry about. That is until they cross the street and the sound of footsteps behind you makes you aware of someone else following you. 

Just relax Y/n it’s probably just another person like you walking home, you’re just being paranoid, that’s all, you try to convince yourself. But the feeling of being watched doesn’t disappear and you start walking faster. Your heart rate speeds up when the footsteps start becoming faster as well. You refuse to look back and let the person know you’re aware of them so you keep your head down and walk even faster. The footsteps are closer now and you can see an alley coming up. You’re just about to make a run for it across the street not caring if you’re jaywalking or looking foolish when a figure comes out of nowhere from the side. 

You freeze in fear but when the light falls over the stranger's face you relax. It’s Jungkook. 

“Hey what are you doing here?” You ask breathing out a sigh of relief and look back over your shoulder only to see the man that was walking behind you cross the street.

“I uh… got off of work early and saw you walking so I thought I’d join you,” Jungkook replies following the man with his eyes before he smiles and takes the bag out of your hand and carries it for you. 

“O, well thank you.” You say falling into step beside him.

“Did you do grocery shopping?” He peeks into the bag and immediately starts laughing. “I guess not.” He chuckles.

“I had a bad day okay,” You go to rip the bag from his hand but he moves it out of your grasp, swatting away your hand. 

“So your reaction is to buy half of the store’s chocolate?” He teases, smiling at you. 

You cross your arms over your chest defensively. “Yes, it is a coping mechanism.”

He just giggles and the sound makes you stare at him, you’ve never heard him giggle before and it almost makes you want to laugh. You survey the way he’s limping a bit to the side of his injury making a mental note to check on it.

“I’m glad to see you’re still alive.” You state without thinking and he frowns for a second before realisation seems to dawn on him and he nods. 

“I was planning on dying but then I saw your note and decided against it.” He smiles referring to the sticky note you left him. “I didn’t want to disobey my doctor’s orders.”

“Good, because that would really have tainted my reputation,” You state straight-faced, “ letting someone die before even graduating imagine.”

“Yeah, that would have been bad for you.” He agrees nodding profusely causing you to chuckle. 

You fall into silence, and you breathe in the fresh air deeply, glad that he showed up so you don’t have to be so paranoid. 

“Y/n.” He breaks the silence with a serious tone of voice. You look at him, his face is just as serious as his voice. “You shouldn’t be walking alone.” 

You sigh. “I know I just really wanted chocolate.” You try to justify your actions even if the excuse sounds lame to your own ears.

“Next time, call me okay,” You frown at him unsure of what he’s saying. “I’ll bring you chocolate.” 

You’re taken aback by his words. He’s offering to bring you chocolate so that you don’t have to walk at night? 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” You mumble not knowing what else to say. You didn’t expect him to say something like that, you guess maybe the fact that you two seemed to be able to have a whole conversation made it easier for him to talk to you or maybe it made it easier for you. He does seem much more approachable than he use to. He always came across as cold, but now you guess you’re seeing his true personality coming out to you and you like it, or maybe he hit his head last night as well.

“I’m sorry you had a bad day.” He tries to keep the conversation going and you look at him in surprise. Jip, he definitely hit his head. But you don’t want to be rude so you answer.

“It’s okay.” 

You reach your apartment door without saying another word, but the silence wasn’t awkward like you expected it was more like a comfortable one. 

“Careful,” he muses when walking into the apartment, “The rug is wet.” He says it almost sheepishly but plays it off as nonchalantly as he can.

You look down to find the rug wet and the bloodstain now a mere trace of pink. 

“You cleaned it?” You say in wonder, stepping over it so as not to get your socks wet. 

“Yeah I know you said you like modern art but I assumed you were joking.” He puts the bag down on the counter. “Unless you weren’t in which case I can bleed on it again.” 

You laugh at his serious face and it morphs into a smile. 

“That’s okay.” You giggle, before saying very seriously, “Please don’t do that.” He nods. 

You survey the way he is standing gripping onto his side.

“How are you doing? With the injury and all?” You ask trying to tread lightly in case he becomes defensive like some people do when asked.

To your surprise, he grimaces, “I was hoping you could maybe take a look at it?” 

“Yeah of course.” You nod a bit flattered that he asked. 

You lead him to the bathroom and instruct him to stand by the sink, that way you can easily throw the dirty gauze somewhere other than the coffee table. 

“Uhm you have to take off your shirt.” You say awkwardly, fidgeting in your med kit even though you already have the supplies you need in hand.

You see movement in your peripheral vision and you turn around, blushing a bit at the sight of him without a shirt. Of course, you’ve always known he’s handsome. When you first met him you thought he must be some kind of demigod, with his sharp jawline and pretty eyes, so seeing him now you gulp. You saw him without a shirt last night but that was while you were panicking. Now it takes a moment for your brain to stop going haywire. 

“Right uhm…” You clear your throat and the ghost of a smirk crosses his face. 

“Aren’t you going to take yours off again?” He teases and your blush deepens, burning your cheeks.

“O uhm…” You stammer over your words. 

 “I’m joking, I know it was because you needed to stop the bleeding,” he reassures you, poking you on the nose and bending down a bit to look you in the eye. “Stop blushing.” He adds when he sees how flustered you look.

“It’s not really something I can control.” You mumble and unwrap his bandages. You’re very close to him, you can feel his body heat radiating off of him and you can’t help but wonder if he has a fever.

“You’re really hot.” You say without thinking and he stares at you in surprise lifting an eyebrow at your statement before you realise what you said. “I didn’t mean…uhm you feel warm, I’m scared you may have a fever.” You stammer to try and explain yourself.

“No don’t worry I usually run warm.” He says to calm you down and you just nod, sticking a thermometer in his mouth anyway even if it just to keep him from teasing you any further. 

You can feel his eyes on you as you check his stitches. They are still intact so you can stop worrying about that at least. You disinfect the wound again before putting on the fresh dressing. 

The beeping of the thermometer comes and a moment later he’s handing it to you. 

“See no fever.” He triumphantly states and you look at the normal temperature flashing on the device. 

“Well, then I guess…” You’re cut off by his phone ringing and he immediately picks it up.

“Yeah Hyung.” He answers and you turn away to put everything back into your medkit. 

“I know I’m sorry but it was an emergency.” You frown. You don’t mean to eavesdrop but it’s kind of hard not to when he’s standing right next to you. 

“I’ll be right there,” He nods while the person on the phone continues to speak. He moves to the side to give you access to the sink and you remove the gauze from it, to throw it away. “Yeah okay bye.” He hangs up. 

“I have to go.” He states and you frown. 

“I thought you were off tonight?” You remember he said that when he joined you on the street. 

“Yeah but uhm… something came up, they need my help.” He pulls his shirt over his head again, letting a hiss through his teeth at the movement. 

“O okay.” You don’t know what you were expecting. Him to be home tonight and what? You two sitting on the couch watching a movie or something? That is absurd. Just because you’re talking doesn’t mean you’re suddenly friends. 

“Thank you for this.” He gestures to the medkit and you nod before he hastily leaves the bathroom. A few seconds later you hear the front door close, the “my pleasure” still on your tongue.

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.

.

The heart is enclosed in the pericardium, which’s main function is to protect it and prevent it from over-expanding. The pericardium is 

“Take that Jungkook!“

The pericardium is attached to the diaphragm and inner surface 

“I will end you Jimin!” 

The inner surface of the 

“Listen you little fuckers I am the king you will tremble before me.” 

Of the 

“Taehyung that’s cheating.” 

The 

“Ha, you losers I win again!” 

“The sternum!” You finally snap. You’re trying to study but you’ve been on the same paragraph for the last 20 minutes. You push your chair back from the desk, the wheels scrapping on the floor due to the speed. 

You can still hear them shouting at each other as you stomp down the hallway. 

You know they’re playing a video game. Jungkook moved his gaming system out of his room a few weeks ago because according to him the wifi is better in the living room. 

You round the corner only to find the three on the carpet. On the screen Taehyung’s name is on top of the board, the other two’s names following. Jimin is on Jungkook’s back, who is trying to strangle Taehyung. The scene may look scary but you roll your eyes. They do this all the time. 

The first time you walked out of your room to find two strangers on your couch you almost had a heart attack, but Jimin and Taehyung made a big fuss about how they finally get to meet Jungkook’s roommate. Apparently according to them Jungkook has been talking about you a lot. Jungkook obviously denied it, to his hyungs amusement.

Since then Jungkook’s friends seem to be here every day. Jimin and Taehyung could basically be living here but Hoseok sometimes drops by too. You know there are others you haven’t met yet because you picked up on the same names mentioned often. You would ask why you haven’t met them if you didn’t already have your hands full with the two currently trying to beat up your roommate. 

“Hey, guys?” Your voice makes them freeze, all three heads snapping to you. With their eyes on you now, you lose a bit of your fire. Surprisingly you’re more comfortable with them than most people, probably due to the close proximity, but sometimes when all three very handsome men look at you, you end up flustered. Unfortunately for you that seems to happen quite often seeing as you have been spending more time with Jungkook, which also means spending time with his friends.

“If you want to kill each other, do it somewhere else, please.” You roll your eyes, playing off your shyness by walking past them, feigning disinterest. 

“Sorry Y/n” Jimin laughs, getting up from the carpet, and joining you in the kitchen before Taehyung or Jungkook can even move. 

“Were you studying?” He asks, sitting on the counter and watching you make coffee for yourself. 

“Yeah, I was.” You rub your eyes until you see stars, your eyes burning from looking at your laptop for so long.

“What were you studying?” Taehyung leans next to Jimin making sure you pay attention to both of them. 

“The heart.” You don’t know why they both look at Jungkook who is leaning on the back of the couch watching you three before answering. 

“O well I can’t help you with matters of the heart.” Jimin states and you frown, you didn’t think he would be able to help you. 

“I can however help you with something else that doesn’t require the heart.” He smirks at you and your eyes widen at his suggestive sentence, you still can’t get used to Jimin’s casual flirty personality. 

“Hyung.” Jungkook’s voice is deep and the way he says it sounds like a warning. 

“I’m only joking Kookie,” Jimin and Taehyung smirk at the younger boy and Jungkook glares at them before rolling his eyes.

You look away from whatever is happening there and instead look at the now dubbed sticky note wall. 

It started with Jungkook’s thank you note and evolved from there. Now, whenever you leave, you leave the other a note, usually including a ridiculous reminder like don’t die, watch out for cannibals, don’t step into fairy rings. Stupid stuff like that. You both get teased by Jimin and Taehyung about it, but neither of you have stopped. Maybe the smile that adorns your lips every time you find a note stuck to the door or a coffee cup, if it’s in the morning, makes you ignore the teasing. In your defence, Jungkook doesn’t seem deterred by it either.

“Well, I’m going back to studying, try and keep it down okay.” You declare to the three, who were unbeknownst to you having a whole non-verbal conversation. You take your coffee cup and walk back down the hallway. 

“Y/n” You backtrack at your name being called. 

“Yes, Jungkook.” You wait for him to say something, staring at him, and he just stares back at you for a moment before looking away and clearing his throat.

“Uhm…” He looks to his hyungs standing in the kitchen observing him. “Enjoy your studying.” He looks like he wants to kick himself, but you do not have time to dwell on it now. 

“Thanks?” You tilt your head in confusion, getting a nod in return and walking to your room to finally finish the stupid heart, having to ignore the way yours is pounding from Jungkook’s eyes on you. 

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.

.

“That test was so easy. If anyone does badly they really shouldn’t be studying medicine.” Becky boasts walking next to you. 

You wish she would disappear and go bother someone else but she clearly can’t take a hint. The test she is referring to was actually hard for you and now her words are starting to make you feel worse than you did when you were struggling through it. You shrink into yourself chewing on your lip. 

She’s the type of person who does well in everything and likes gloating about it. She somehow decided that you were her friend and now you have to suffer through her long rants about how perfect she is and how everyone else isn’t, including you. 

“O my god.” She suddenly interrupts herself and you look up wanting to see what caused it. “Who is he?” she asks and you frown in confusion following her gaze only to land on Jungkook. 

He’s leaning on the wall next to the gate of the university talking on his phone. He’s dressed in all black as usual and his hair is falling into his face a bit. You understand why she reacted the way she did because he looks extremely hot, and not in the having-a-fever kind of way. 

“He looks like he was sculpted by the gods wow.” Becky continues gushing. “Do you think I should ask for his number?” 

“No.” The word escapes your mouth before you can stop it. For some reason, the thought of her asking out your roommate and him agreeing irks you a lot more than you thought it would. You’re sure it’s just because it’s Becky but the more you think about it the more it bothers you. 

Becky however didn’t seem to hear you or maybe she is just ignoring you. 

“I think I should.” She continues and you can feel yourself getting angry. “See he’s walking this way.” She sounds giddy about it, sure that he must have noticed her.

Jungkook, who hung up his call when he noticed you, is walking towards you two his smile fading when he sees the look on your face.

“Hi?” He phrases it like a question not sure why you’re looking like you want to murder someone. 

“H…” You respond before getting cut off.

“Hey, my name is Becky.” She flips her hair over her shoulder and smiles at him.

“Yeah, uhm… hi.” He frowns and her smile falters.  “I came to walk you home since it’s almost dark.” He explains himself to you turning away from the now seething girl. 

“O, thank you.” You smile, feeling a little smug when you see the shocked expression on Becky’s face. He’s just about to reply when Becky worms her way in between you two again.

“O do you know her?” Her voice is high and she giggles, you roll your eyes. “We’re like best friends, I’m sure she must have mentioned me.” 

“Not really.” Jungkook raises an eyebrow at her and for the first time, you see him getting irritated. His eyes go narrow and he sucks in his cheeks a bit staring at her. She shrinks under the stare. 

You’ve never understood why Jimin and Tae said that people are intimidated by Jungkook but now you do. You feel bad for Becky because you know under that stare you would be running for the hills. So you step in.

“Becky I’ll see you on Monday okay.” You step around her and take Jungkook by the arm pulling him away, leaving Becky speechless probably for the first time in her life. 

You walk fast to get away from the awkward situation. 

“Sorry about her, she’s just uhm…” You try to make an excuse for her, not really sure why you are trying to do so. 

“Spoilt?” Jungkook offers and you laugh and nod.

“Basically yeah.” That’s definitely one way to describe her.

 “Thank you for coming to pick me up.” You steer the conversation away from talking about her. 

“No problem, I didn’t want you walking in the dark.” His calm and smiley demeanor is back and you breath a sigh of relief.

You walk beside him in silence for a moment. You just can’t seem to shake Becky’s words, she makes you feel so inadequate most of the time. 

“So how was the test?” He asks pushing you to the side so that he can walk closest to the road. 

You groan and he looks at you, worried. 

“It was awful and she said it was so easy, you know which just makes me think well, that I’m not good enough.” You don’t know why you’re pouring your heart out but right now you just need someone to listen and recently that someone has become Jungkook.

“Wow wait.” Jungkook stops walking causing you to do the same. He places his hands on your shoulders forcing you to face him. “Y/n, you saved my life, stayed calm and stitched me up, not to mention all the times you’ve had to treat me since.” He’s right, he’s probably the clumsiest person you’ve ever met. Always coming home with bruises or cuts. 

“I’m sure she’s never done that.” He continues, pushing your head up to look at him with a finger underneath your chin. “You are going to be a great doctor.” His face is serious but he gives you a light smile when you nod.

“Thank you Jungkook.” You smile at him, feeling better after the pep talk. 

“What are friends for right.” He smiles again, using his one hand still on your shoulder to take your bag off of it. He flings it over his shoulder instead and starts walking again, and you follow. 

It’s the first time you’ve heard him actually say that you two are friends, it makes you glad to know he feels as close to you as you do to him. The space that was there for the first six months of him living with you is now completely gone, erased by the weeks you’ve been spending time together. 

“Does she do that often?” He wonders out loud and you know what he’s referring to.

“Yeah sometimes.” You admit looking to the side ashamed to admit how you let her get to you. 

“Do you want me to kill her?” He says it with such a serious tone that you laugh at him. 

“No, I think I’ll do it if it gets too much.” You joke and after a moment he laughs. 

“And how would you dispose of her body hm?” He keeps the joke going and you pretend to think, placing your finger to your chin and tilting your head up. 

“I’ll get you to do it for me.” You declare pointing to him. He laughs shaking his head. 

“No, your kill, your responsibility.” He says and you pout. 

“That’s not fair.” The running joke of you finding a way to hide a body has been going on since the night of him almost bleeding out. You’ve been bringing up ways randomly but he shoots them down every time. 

“How about a woodchipper?” You ask, already expecting his head to shake. 

“Wouldn’t work, you know how strong a human body is, it’ll only cause a mess, and leave too much evidence.” He explains and you groan. 

“How do you know all this?” You ask, glaring at him in feigned suspicion. 

“Call it an educated guess.” He smiles and nudges you only to pull you out of the way of a pole a second later because you were still staring at him. 

“I think you spend too much time thinking about this.” You huff, crossing your arms across your chest. 

“Like you don’t.” He retorts and you gasp.

“Only because of you.” You exclaim, throwing your hands up.

“Besides,” he continues, “It’s fun to see your reaction when you're wrong, you don’t like being wrong.” he elaborates.

You pout again. “Does anyone?” You glare at him but he laughs at you. 

“I guess not no.” He relents and you smile. 

You look at him waiting for him to say something. You marvel in the way the last rays of sunshine bounces off his dark hair, painting his facial features in a soft glow.

He looks at you suddenly, you gasp and look away embarrassed at being caught staring at him. He chuckles and you cringe, looking down as you walk.

“Y/n?” He asks and you look at him only to find him not next to you but behind you standing still. “Where are you going?” he chuckles and you blush when you realise you just walked past your apartment building too busy chastising yourself for staring at him.

“O right.” you chuckle, trying to hide your blush from him. 

He opens the building door for you and you enter. 

“I was thinking we could watch…” You trail off when you realise he isn’t following you in.

“You’re not coming up?” You guess and he rubs the back of his neck awkwardly.

“I have to go, sorry.” He apologises but you nod taking your bag from him. 

He always has to leave, you’d think you’d be used to it by now but you always find yourself feeling disappointed because you can’t spend more time together. It’s a new feeling for you, being upset because you can’t spend time with someone. Usually, you’re upset when you have to. 

“Okay, be safe.” You say sheepishly. 

“Thanks, we can watch whatever you were going to say next time okay?” You nod and he walks off.

You stand there a minute looking at his retreating back before you turn to the elevator. 

The elevator takes forever and when it finally does arrive you are horrified at what you find inside. 

A stranger. 

Shyly you walk in. 

“What floor?” The man asks and you press your floor button instead of answering. 

“Hi, I’m Damion.” You sigh, he’s the type to talk in elevators then. 

“I’m Y/n.” You mumble, but he caught it. 

“Hello Y/n, I’m new to the building, maybe you can show me around some time?” He says and his straightforwardness catches you off guard. 

“O uhm…” You rack your brain for an excuse, wishing for the elevator to speed up. “I would but I’m very busy maybe you should ask someone else.” 

“It’s alright I’ll wait for when you have time, Y/n.” He says confidently. You know he is just being persistent but for some reason the way he says your name gives you a bad feeling. 

You’re saved from answering by the doors opening on your floor. 

“Goodnight.” You say and try to rush out of the elevator away from him, but he grabs your arm stopping you. Your eyes grow wide and you look down at the hand encasing your wrist.

“See you around.” He says and lets you go, with a smile. 

You immediately run out and only let out a sigh of relief when you lock your apartment door behind you. You shudder when you remember his gaze on you but it’s quickly pushed from your mind when your eyes land on the sticky note stuck to the door. 

“Enjoy your evening, try not to get kidnapped by elves.” You laugh and stick it to the sticky note wall. 

By the time you get into bed, the only memories playing in your head are of Jungkook’s face as he laughs. Your creepy neighbour is pushed from your mind. 

.

.

.

Your back is killing you. You woke up seconds ago and found yourself not on your comfy bed but rather on your desk chair. You feel something sticking to your face and you wipe at it lazy. One of your pages of notes floats down onto the desk and you sigh. You haven’t slept more than five hours in the past three days and you can feel your head pounding from the lack of sleep. The past few weeks have been a blur of tests and classes so you haven’t had a day off. You look at your phone to find a few missed calls from your mom. You’ll have to call her back later after you’ve had coffee.

You slowly get up, stumbling a bit and having to support yourself on the wall. That’s how you walk to the kitchen leaning on the wall the entire time. You miss the three heads that turn to you, too focused on trying to keep yourself upright. 

“Morning.” Jungkook’s voice breaks through the muddled thoughts in your brain. You groan in response, leaning against the counter to try and catch your breath. Was the walk to the kitchen always this tiring?

“Are you making coffee? ” Taehyung asks getting up from his spot on the couch, eager for a cup of his own. 

“Yeah just give me a second.” You reply working up the courage to walk to the coffee maker a few steps away. You feel very dizzy. 

“Hey, are you okay?” Taehyung asks, stepping closer to get a look at your very pale face. 

“I’m fine.” No, you’re not but non the less you still have some studying to do and you have class in an hour. So you push away from the counter but as soon as you do you stumble and everything goes a bit hazy for a second. 

“Wow okay.” Taehyung rights you with a very worried look on his face, the other two have stopped their game and are now staring at you in worry. 

Jungkook jumps over the back of the couch and makes his way to you, replacing Tae’s arm around you. He is frowning at you and places his hand on your forehead. 

“Holly shit Y/n you have a fever.” He exclaims, but you groan at the information. 

“No I can’t have a fever,” You push away from him but immediately almost fall over, being caught again by Jungkook. 

“Y/n I think you’re sick,” Jungkook says softly and you shake your head.

“I can’t be sick,” You feel like crying, “I have a class to get to.” You’re in denial, you know you’re sick but being sick right now is a big inconvenience. Becky has been boasting about how much she is studying and how prepared she is for the tests, you’ve been trying to keep up.

“Hey come on,” Taehyung says. “ Jungkook why don’t you help her sit down and I’ll make her some tea.” You still shake your head but gasp in surprise when you’re lifted off the floor by Jungkook. He carries you bridal style to the couch and gently puts you down where Jimin has made room for you. 

“I can’t guys I have to go to class.” You protest making to get up again but you’re held down by Jungkook’s hands. 

“Y/n your sick, you’re not going to class.” Jungkook orders. Why is his doctor’s voice better than yours? 

“I’m fine okay, let me go.” You remove his hands from your shoulder. 

“Clearly.” Jimin pipes up and you glare at him. “All I’m saying is, that if you go to class you’ll probably pass out along the way, and what then?” 

“Then Jungkook will have to put his body hiding skills to work.” You state. The other two frown in confusion at Jungkook but he just shakes his head. 

“I can’t do that, it’ll be too noticeable if I’m seen carrying you off of the street,” He smiles at you, leans in and tilts his head to the side a bit, “Too risky you know?” He whispers, and you look up at him, he’s frowning slightly at you in worry. You’ve gotten closer to Jungkook than you would have ever thought possible. He’s become a constant in your life like you never thought you’d experience and definitely not with your once elusive roommate. He’s the one you run to after a bad day and he always listens intently to your rants 

“Besides what is going to happen if you miss one class?” Taehyung asks, making you tear your gaze away from Jungkook as Tae hands you a cup of tea that you wrinkle your nose at.

“I don’t know I’ve never missed a class.” You say frowning at the shocked expression on their faces. 

“You’ve never missed a class?” Jimin asks in disbelief and you nod. 

“Wow, just wow.” Taehyung shakes his head. 

“Then I feel like this is a good excuse to miss one,” Jungkook states and pushes the cup of tea closer to your face, prompting you to drink but you grimace and shake your head. 

“I have to go Jungkook.” You fight back. “I won’t be able to stand her if I miss a class and get a bad mark.”

“Who?” Taehyung frowns but Jungkook nods already knowing who you’re talking about.

“Is that why you’ve been overworking yourself?” He asks in concern and you nod your head slowly, looking away from him. 

“Y/n,” Jungkook kneels in front of you so you're at eye level. “ You can’t let her get to you, you know she’s just trying to tear you down.” 

“I know but still…” You trail off unsure how to voice your thoughts. 

“Tell you what if you promise to stay home and rest,” Jungkook empathizes the last word, “ Then I’ll help you study okay?” 

“We’ll help you study.” Jimin corrects him, already disliking whoever it is that is making you feel inferior.

“Sounds like a bad bargain.” You reply and cross your arms, but you know there is no getting out of it. 

You know Jungkook well enough by now to know that when he puts his mind to something there is no turning back. You once saw him try to fit a whole orange in his mouth because Hobi dared him to. And if you’re honest with yourself even though you know that they won’t be able to help you study the fact that they offered to makes you feel all warm inside.

They all hold their breath ready to fight more but you sigh, leaning back onto the couch. 

“Fine.” Is all you say and they relax. 

“Keep an eye on her in case she makes a run for it.” Jungkook jokes poking your nose, before getting up. 

“Yeah like she’ll be able to run in her condition,” Taehyung replies sitting down on the couch next to you.

You look around the room. Your apartment has become if you had to describe it, lively. Before the “shared” space in the apartment was clean and cold but since you and Jungkook have become closer the space shows that two people live here. Your textbooks and cups are on the coffee table where you were making notes while he played games, and two of his hoodies are thrown into the blanket basket because he was too lazy to put them away. The blanket that Jimin throws over your shoulders also belongs to Jungkook. It’s a thick fluffy blanket that you’ve been stealing from his room to lay on the couch with since you found out it existed. After a while, he just stopped taking it back to his room. 

“Here you go.” Jungkook kneels in front of you with freshly made coffee, that you eagerly exchange the cup of tea for. He chuckles and place the cup of tea on the coffee table. You wonder how he knew to make you coffee. 

“Thank you.” You clutch onto the warm cup and sink further into the couch. Jungkook sits down beside you and Taehyung takes a spot on the floor picking up the controllers they abandoned, and handing it back to them.  

They continue playing their game, on a much lower volume, while you slowly drink your coffee. It’s black coffee. You used to drink it with milk and sugar but every time Jungkook made you coffee he made it black. At first, you didn’t want to say anything feeling too awkward but now you actually prefer it the way he makes it.

You never thought you would be this comfortable with people around in your apartment but their presence is soothing. You guess you’ve never realised how lonely you were before, now you recognise when they’re not here and especially at night when Jungkook is gone you can feel his absence. You still don’t like being around people but maybe the man sitting next to you checking every few minutes if you’re okay, putting his hand on your forehead to check your fever, is the exception. 

The warm drink and background noise of the game and their voices are lulling you to sleep. You feel one of them remove the coffee cup from your hand as you fall to the side, onto Jungkook, your tired body finally finding the time to rest, and recover.

You wake up a few hours later. Your head feels foggy, your entire body hurts and you feel all hot and cold at the same time. You hear a voice coming from somewhere but they’re not talking to you so you keep your eyes closed and try to make out what is being said. 

Jungkook is speaking in a hushed voice probably to try and not wake you. “I know hyung but I can’t just leave her.” You frown, is he talking about you? 

“Jimin and Tae said they’ll take over for me today.” You can hear him pacing while he hums in acknowledgement at whatever the other person is saying.  “Thank you hyung, will you ask Jin-hyung about the food?” You are getting very hot now, it’s like a hot tingle traveling through your body and you kick the blanket off you, sighing at the rush op cold air that envelops you. 

“Hey,” Jungkook’s voice is right beside you, “you awake?” You must have not heard him hang up the call.  

You slowly open your eyes, and you're met with his worried face. His hair is disheveled as if he has been tugging at it and in your fever hazed mind you reach out a hand to flatten it. He doesn’t acknowledge it and instead puts his hand on your forehead. 

“You’re still very hot.” He frowns and bites his lip in worry but you laugh. 

“Good to know I still got it.” You joke, but the words hurt your dry throat. 

He picks up a glass of water on the coffee table that he must have put there earlier and hands it to you. “You have to drink all of this okay?” He gives you a stern look. 

“Okay doctor.” You sass but take the glass anyway and start sipping. As soon as the water touches your lips however you can’t stop drinking, realising how thirsty you actually are, you gulp down the whole glass. 

Jungkook stares at you in surprise. “Wow do you want some more?” 

“No thank you, I think I’ll be okay.” You smile and readjust yourself to sit up. 

Jungkook sticks his hand out stopping you. “Wait I don’t think you should get up just yet.” 

You shake his hand off. “I’m fine Jungkook.” You roll your eyes at him and sit up. “see I’m completely fine I can even,” You stand up, but as soon as you’re up you see stars, your vision goes black and you fall into Jungkook’s arms. 

“Maybe you shouldn’t do that yeah?” He laughs and you hit him playfully in the chest. “Don’t laugh.” 

“How can I not when you’re being so stubborn.” He puts you back onto the couch and you pout.

“Don’t pout.” He smiles but you only pout more causing him to laugh. “You’re cute when you’re  sick,” he teases and you look away from him crossing your arms. 

“I’m not that sick.” You retort but you know you’re lying. Your head is pounding and everything hurts. 

“Well in that case I’ll just return all this medicine that I got,” you nod and he gets up walking away but then he turns back, “ and I guess all the chocolates too.” 

You swing around to look at him. He’s already smirking at you, getting the reaction he clearly wanted from you. 

“You got chocolate?” You glare at him in suspicion. 

“Yes and you can have some,” You smile wide but he holds up a finger, “after you eat some food.” 

“Chocolate is food.” You retrot. Even though the thought of chocolate is alluring, the thought of food makes you feel nauseous. 

Jungkook shakes his head crossing his arms over his chest, but just as he wants to reply there is a knock at the door. 

You frown in confusion but Jungkook opens it with a smile. 

“Hyung you're here faster than I expected.” Jungkook says to whoever is at the door and you lean over to see, expecting Jimin or Taehyung but the man that is standing in the doorway makes you gasp. He is so handsome it almost hurts.  “I was already on the way when Namjoon called you.”

“This must be Y/n?” The stranger says noticing you before smiling. You openly stare at him and Jungkook clears his throat raising his eyebrows at you. You start at being caught and a blush rises in your face. 

“Yes this is Y/n.” Jungkook says amused at your reaction. “Y/n this is Jin, he’s my oldest Hyung.” 

You nod, “hi,” you cringe. You sound so stupid. 

“Well here is the food Kookie.” Jin hands Jungkook a bag, “I need to get going, but it was nice meeting you Y/n.” He waves and you wave back awkwardly. He laughs and ruffles Jungkook’s hair before walking away.  

“So that was Jin.” Jungkook smiles taking the food to the counter. 

“He’s uhm very…”

“Handsome?” Jungkook offers and you groan. 

“I didn’t mean to stare I promise.” You bite your lip but Jungkook laughs.

“It’s okay everyone has the same reaction, I promise he’s more flattered than anything else.” He chuckles and you cringe. 

You really need to get a grip on yourself but you just don’t understand why all these handsome men are suddenly popping up in your life. It’s like someone is playing a stupid joke on you. 

“Here you go.” Jungkook hands you a bowl of food that you wrinkle your nose at. “You have to eat.” Jungkook press but you shake your head. 

“I really don’t want to.” You pout and he sighs. 

He bites his lip. “Just a few bites.” You don’t budge. 

“Please?” He pouts and holds up a spoon full of rice. You frown before rolling your eyes and taking a deliberate bite. 

He smiles in victory. You have no idea why you gave in to him. You would blame it on your fever but you’re pretty sure you would have given in even if you weren’t as sick as you are. You take another bite that he holds for you.

“I can eat by myself you know.” You say after you swallow.

He chuckles. “I’m not taking a chance.” He lifts up another spoon full and you look him in the eye as you let him feed you. 

He gets happier after every bite until finally you hold up your hand. 

“I can’t eat anymore,” and he nods understanding, putting the bowl down on the table. You pull your knees closer to you and wrap the blanket around yourself getting cold again. 

“How do you feel?” Jungkook asks putting his hand on your forehead. “You’re still very warm, if your fever hasn’t broke in a few hours I’m gonna take you to the hospital okay?” 

You nod, feeling yourself falling asleep again. “Okay.” You lay down on your side. “Will you stay?” 

Jungkook smiles softly and nods, “Yeah of course.” He strokes some hair form your face. “I’ll stay.” 

You hum contently and fall into unconsciousness. 

.

.

.

A ruckus in the kitchen wakes you up. You immediately shoot upright in bed, your body on high alert. You listen again but it’s quiet now. You pick up your phone looking at the time. It’s just past three in the morning, you should still be alone.

You debate calling Jungkook for a second but push the thought aside, you’d only feel stupid doing it,  besides you don’t want to disturb him. He went out with his friends for the night, it’s the weekend after all so he is off work but he told you he’d be crashing at Jimin’s place. So instead you get out of bed and tiptoe to your door. You press your ear to it trying to listen for any movement but there is nothing. 

You chew on your lip and decide to investigate. If this was a horror movie the whole audience would be yelling at you now. 

You creep down the hallway and peek around the corner to look at the kitchen. The lights are on and you see Jungkook digging around in the fridge. You laugh at yourself for being paranoid. 

The sound startles Jungkook and he spins around to face you. His face relaxes when he sees you and it morphs into a lopsided grin. 

“Hey, did I wake you? Sorry.” He pouts and your eyes widen in surprise at him but you just shake your head walking to the kitchen island.

“What are you doing back?” You ask leaning over the counter to see what he was doing. “I thought you were sleeping at Jimin’s?” 

“No, I wanted to come home because…” He is cut off by a hiccup. You look at him, he is leaning a bit to one side as if he is off balance and his eyes look glassy. 

“Jungkook are you drunk?” You giggle when he shakes his head profusely, the movement causing him to grimace and fall a bit to one side, only to catch himself in time. 

“No, I am not.” His words are a bit slurred and you laugh again. 

“Then why are you rummaging through our fridge at three in the morning?” You ask lifting an eyebrow. 

He opens his mouth as if to say something but he closes it again with a frown, unable to come up with an excuse.

“I wanted ramyun.” He says after an embarrassingly long time, through which you were giggling.

“Well, you’re not going to find it in the fridge.” You state and watch in amusement when he frowns and points to the cupboard, looking at you for approval. 

“Sit down I’ll make you some.” You chuckle and move to the cupboard getting out the packet.

“Thank you.” He drawls out and sits down on the bar stool.

“I just don’t want to have to treat burn wounds tonight.” You explain and smile at him, which he returns with a grin. 

You boil the water and look behind you to find him spinning on the stool. He stops when he feels you looking at him and he grins lopsidedly.

“I missed you.” He says and you frown. “I didn’t see you at all this week.” He pouts and you giggle at the expression. He looks so cute. 

He’s right this week you’ve been missing each other the entire time. You had another group assignment and had to work in the library with them the entire day. When you finally got home he was already gone. His words do surprise you but you brush it off as nothing more than drunk rambling. 

“I missed you too.” You say and he gasps in surprise. 

“You did?” He sounds like a child that was just told something unbelievable, and it makes you laugh.

“Yeah, we’re friends right?” That word has been starting to leave a bitter taste in your mouth recently, and you have an idea why, but you keep pushing it down. There is no reason to be thinking like that part of you wants to think. “Friends miss friends.” You finish, turning back to the food you’re making. 

“You’re right, I miss my hyungs when I don’t see them for a long time.” He rambles on behind you. “I think it’s because we all used to live together, but now I live here of course with you, right?” He sounds unsure and you chuckle. 

“Yes, you do.” You confirm it for him.

“Okay great.” He sounds pleased about it. 

He babbles on about stupid things while you cook, telling you about his night. He mentions a few girls that came up to him and you prickle a bit every time but he always rambles on not mentioning them again. 

Finally, you turn around and hand him the bowl of food that he takes with a smile. You lean on the other side of the counter watching him eat. 

“This is amazing,” he exclaims in between bites. “If this doctor thing doesn’t work out, you should become a chef.”

“You only say that because you’re drunk.” You explain with a laugh but he shakes his head, cheeks full of food. 

The conversation dies down while he eats. You move around cleaning up and filling up a bottle with water for him to drink. You place it down beside his now-empty bowl.

“You have to drink all of this now okay?” You say in your doctor's voice and he groans.

“All of it?” He says in disbelief and you smile.

“Yes or else you’ll have a nasty hangover tomorrow.” He nods and picks up the bottle, you laugh at his dramatic show of drinking the whole thing.

“I like it when I make you laugh,” he says when he’s finished and you blush. He stares at you.

“I like it when you blush too.” He adds and you blush even more. 

“I blush too easily when I’m with you.” You admit and he gets up to put the water bottle in the sink. He comes back without a word and stands next to you. 

“Here.” He places his cold hands on your cheeks. “To cool them down.” He smiles and you gasp at the contact. 

Another thing you’ve come to notice since becoming friends with him, other than that you felt lonely before is just how  incredibly touch-starved you are. He is so casual with his touches, always hugging you or sitting close to you and you realised how much you’ve been missing human contact. You can admit to yourself the fact that it is coming from him does also impact the effect it has. 

“There see all better.” He removes his hands and you cringe at how quickly you miss the contact. 

He is standing very close to you, your chests almost touching and the realisation makes you blush again. 

“O no, Y/n.” He moans and places his hands back onto your cheeks, stepping even closer. “You’re ruining my handy work.” He whispers. 

You stare at him. He is so beautiful and you’ve never been so close to him before. His eyes are shining and his lips are pink and look so soft. You pull your eyes away from his lips only to find him staring at yours. 

You bite your lip at the attention and he frowns moving his finger down to pull your bottom lip out from under your teeth. 

“You shouldn’t do that.” His voice sounds huskier now and it makes your heart race. 

“Why not?” You ask him softly.

“Because it makes me want to do this.” He says before leaning in slowly. 

You stop breathing, your heart racing and you close your eyes in anticipation of his lips falling onto yours. 

Just when you can feel his breath breezing over your lips, a door slams shut somewhere, breaking you out of the trance you were in. 

You back away from Jungkook. You were just about to kiss him! You were about to kiss him and he is drunk! You chastise yourself, missing the hurt that crosses his face. 

“I uhm… I think I should go back to bed.” You stammer out and rush out of the kitchen to your room. 

You close the door behind you and sink to the floor with your back to it. You can’t believe you were about to take advantage of his drunkenness and why? Because you have a bit of a crush on him? It’s disgusting. You rake your fingers through your hair and focus on calming your racing heart. The blush is burning through your cheeks and you place your own hands-on them to cool it down. 

You can only hope he won’t remember tonight.

.

.

.

“And that is the last time I’m asking your dad to make Lasagna.” You laugh and take a sip of your coffee. The café is buzzing with activity and your mom just finished filling you in on the antics your family have been up to since you last saw them. 

Your mom came to the city for work but her last meeting was canceled so you had time to get coffee with her. You watch her add more sugar to her coffee and laugh. She’s always had a sweet tooth. You got yours from her. 

“Do you want some?” She holds out the sugar pot to you after seeing you eye her coffee, but you shake your head. 

“No thanks, I drink my coffee black now.” You watch her surprised face and giggle. 

“Who are you and what have you done to my daughter?” She clutches her hand to her chest and you shake your head at her dramatics, smiling widely. 

You’ve really missed her. You’ve always been close to your family, even if they drive you crazy. Even your little sister, who couldn’t be more different from you, always on the sports field, but despite your differences you’ve always loved her terribly. 

“I just like it like this now.” You explain and she narrows her eyes at you in suspicion but eventually shrugs.

“How have you been honey?” she asks leaning forward with a caring look on her face. 

“I’m doing good,” you smile and when your mom doesn’t seem convinced you place your hand on hers. “I really am mom.”

“Are you sure? You look like there is something bothering you, not to mention you look like you haven’t slept in a month.” Her voice becomes stern at the last part and you roll your eyes.

“You sound like Jungkook.” The words just slip out and her eyes widen in surprise.

“Your roommate?” She asks and you nod your head.

“He’s always telling me I should sleep more.” Your mom nods.

“Well maybe you should listen to him he sounds like an intelligent young man.” She muses and you smile but at the thought of your roommate, your mood drops slightly.

After you almost kissed him a week ago there has been a small shift. Mostly things are the same but it’s like something is off. When you’re with his friends he’s his normal self but as soon as you are alone it’s like he becomes tense and soon finds an excuse to leave the room. He doesn’t seem to remember that night but you’re not so sure, why else would he behave like he is? Maybe he regrets almost kissing you and he is just pretending to not remember anything. You guess you should be glad he hasn’t brought up that night, it is what you hoped for after all. But it has left you more confused than anything else, why would he try to kiss you and then just not say anything after that?

“Earth to Y/n.” Your mom waves her hand in front of your face to get your attention. 

“Sorry, mom, what were you saying?” You apologise. Pushing the thoughts bothering you away. You should be enjoying your time with your mom, not worrying about your relationship with Jungkook, whatever that may be.

“I was asking if Lilly told you she got first line for field hockey?” She surveys you worried while she repeats herself. 

“O no she didn’t,” You smile trying to show your mom you’re okay. “You have to tell her I said I’m very proud of her.” 

“I’ll tell her.” Your mom smiles. “She is very excited, she said she’s going to ask you to come to some of her games, you should try to come.” 

“I will I promise.” You know it will be hard but for her, you will make a plan, maybe you can even invite Jungkook and his friends, she would love that. But as soon as the thought crosses your mind you dismiss it, you doubt Jungkook would want to come to anything with you right now. 

The rest of the time you and your mom just talk about your studies and plans for after next year when you graduate and have to start your internship. You bask in the conversation until your mom’s phone rings, signally she has to head out. 

“I love you, honey.” She hugs you tightly, “Make sure you eat well and try to get more sleep okay?” 

“I promise mom.” You giggle in your mom’s embrace. She pulls away holding you at arm's length.

“We are so very proud of you, your dad loves boasting about you on a daily basis.” You both laugh. Your dad has always been the type to tell everyone about every small accomplishment that his daughters achieve. 

“Thank you mom.” she pulls you into another hug just as her taxi stops outside. “Mom you have to go.” You giggle her hold not lessening on you. 

“Just another second, I miss you.” She says and you hug her tighter.

“I miss you too mom.” She finally pulls away and with one last kiss on your cheek she gets into her taxi, waving at you as it drives off. 

You sigh and sniff back the tears that threaten to fall. You shake your head and walk home. 

You can already hear the sound of the movie from outside the door when you get home. You open the door to see Jimin and Taehyung spread out on the couch. Their heads turn to the door when you come in and they smile. 

“Hey, Y/n.” They say in sync, you smile back, removing your boots.

“Hey guys, what are you watching?” You query closing the door. 

“Some movie Taehyung chose.” Jimin sounds bored and Taehyung pouts.

“You told me I have to choose.” Taehyung defends himself. 

“I expected you to choose something good,” Jimin says and is met with a pillow to the face in response. 

You move to the kitchen filling up a glass of water. 

“Where is Jungkook?” You ask when you notice that there isn’t a third person in front of the TV.

“O he went out,” Tae says not looking away from the TV. 

“O” You feel disappointed before something dawns on you. “Wait if he isn’t here how did you get in?” You narrow your eyes in suspicion.

“O well…” Jimin and Tae look at each other. 

“He let us in before he left,” Jimin says after a moment and you nod at the explanation. 

“Do you want to join us?” Tae asks turning around on the couch to see you. 

“No thanks guys, I have to study.” You shake your head and they groan. 

“You always have to study. Come and hang out with us.” Jimin pleads and you have to giggle at his pout. You think about it for a moment, you don’t really want to study anyway. 

“Fine.” You give in and they both smile making space for you on the couch in between them. 

You walk over and sit down in the space. You lean back and make yourself comfortable. 

“Here you can choose a new movie.” Jimin declares stealing the remote from Tae. 

“Hey!” Tae exclaims before clearing his throat. “I mean sure Y/n you can choose a new movie.” He relents and you laugh but don’t take the remote from Jimin’s outstretched hand.

“I’m okay, making choices right now is only going to melt my brain.” You confess and Jimin nods. 

“Okay, I’ll pick.” He says, exiting the movie and starts scrolling for a new one. 

“So don’t you want to know where Jungkook is?” Jimin asks, a mischievous look in his eyes as he looks at you. 

“Jimin.” Taehyung’s voice is stern but Jimin ignores him turning in his seat to face you. 

“So do you want to know?” He asks again and you stare at him. 

“Uhm… okay?” You look between Taehyung and Jimin, unsure about what’s going on. 

“He’s on a date.” Jimin gossips surveying your face for a reaction and you stare at him in surprise. 

“O…” You have to control your face to not show the disappointment that floods through you. “That’s good for him.” You say. 

Jimin and Taehyung exchange a look.

“Does it bother you?” Taehyung asks and you look at him.

“Of course not why would it?” You ask surprised, your voice a little to high and Taehyung smirks.

“Just asking.” He turns back in his seat as Jimin’s movie choice starts playing. 

You sink deeper into the couch and try to focus on the movie playing but your mind keeps going back to the information you just heard. 

He’s on a date. It shouldn’t bother you, you’re friends you should be happy for him but you’re not. It hurts. If he’s on a date it means any feelings you deluded yourself into thinking he has for you aren’t real. You keep thinking about it throughout the movie and soon it morphs into anger. How dare he almost kiss you, not talk to you about it, borderline avoid you and then go on a date with someone else. The anger builds and by the time Jimin and Taehyung leave you are ready to scream. 

You go to your room and try to cool down by focusing on studying, but you can’t. Every time your head goes back to imagining him with someone else and it makes you angry all over again. You finally give up on studying and just when you turn off your laptop you hear the front door open. You sit still for a minute weighing your options. 

You can finally confront him about this and demand to know what is going on, why he tried to kiss you and smooth things over and go back to being friends. Or you can take the easy route out and just ignore him and things can back to how they were in the beginning. You frown, you know you don’t want that. You don’t think you’d be able to handle it if you never speak again, so instead, you get up. 

He’s in the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal when you enter. He stops with the spoon halfway to his mouth when he spots you. 

“Hi.” He says and uncomfortably looks around.

“Hi,” you say back, walking into the kitchen. His eyes follow you as you walk, chewing slowly.

“Well, I’m gonna uhm…” He trails off clearly looking for an excuse to leave but you interrupt him.

“Jungkook can we talk.” You ask and he looks at you in surprise. 

“Uhm, sure.” He puts the bowl done. “About what?” He isn’t looking at you. 

You mentally prepare yourself for what you’re about to say. You hate confrontation but you know you need to do this. 

“About what happened when you were drunk.” You start and he looks at you.

“What do you mean?” He sounds confused but you know him well enough now to know when he is faking. “I can’t remember anything from that night.” 

“Are you sure?” You ask, crossing your arms. “Because you say that but you’ve been borderline avoiding me for the past few weeks and I need to know why.” 

“O well..” He rubs the back of his neck.

“I think you remember and I get if you regret almost kissing me, but you could have at least told me.” You continue not giving him time to try and explain himself. “Then I hear you went on a date, and I mean I get it you can do what you want, but you could at least have talked to me and set things straight and said you were just drunk and not just leave me confused as fuck.” You’re getting angry again and he stares at you in surprise. 

“Wait a date?” Is that really all he got from that? You narrow your eyes at him, why is he playing stupid. 

“Who said I went on a date?” He asks confused and you roll your eyes.

“Jimin told me.” You answer him, getting irritated now.

“Fucking Jimin,” he mumbles before looking at you. “Y/n I didn’t go on a date.” 

“What?” You frown in confusion, caught off guard. 

“Yeah, Jimin,” He moves closer so that he’s in front of you. “He must have told you to get you to confront me because he knows how I feel about you.” 

Your mind reels, and you uncross your arms in surprise. “Wait what do you mean how you feel about me?”

He groans. 

“This wasn’t supposed to happen like this.” He says, running his hands through his hair. “I was supposed to come to you like we practiced.” He says without thinking and you frown.

“Practiced?” You’re so confused. 

“I also wasn’t supposed to say that.” He blushes, and sighs. “I practiced with them how to do this but I guess that isn’t going to happen.” He bites his lip. 

“Jungkook what are you talking about.” You don’t understand what is going on. 

He sighs again. 

“Y/n I’m sorry I’ve been avoiding you but I didn’t know how to say this, and after you pulled away that night I thought you didn’t feel the same and honestly I was scared of being rejected, I know I was being stupid, I’m sorry if it hurt your feelings.” He steps forward, explaining. 

“I just like you a lot, I mean since I got to know you, you’ve been on my mind the entire time, and I thought being friends would be enough but then I got drunk and came home and you were here, I knew I shouldn’t have tried to kiss you but I just couldn’t stop myself you were right there and I couldn’t muster up the courage to do it sober, and then you pulled away and I felt awful for putting you in that situation and…” He rambles and you cut him off.

“Wow Jungkook, calm down.” You don’t even have time to process what he’s saying. 

“How can I calm down?” He says, his face red from blushing and working himself up. “Fuck Y/n I’ve been wanting to tell you for so long.”

His words finally start to sink in and you can feel yourself getting hopeful but you have to make sure what he’s saying.

“Jungkook are you saying you like me?” You ask stupidly and he steps closer taking your face into his hands.

“God Y/n I like you so fucking much, you drive me crazy.” He breathes out leaning in closer and your heart soars, beating unhealthily fast. “Please tell me if you don’t feel the same because then I will stop right now.”

“Jungkook.” He rips his eyes away from your lips and looks you in the eye. “Kiss me.” 

He doesn’t need to be asked twice. 

Finally, his lips find yours, and your heart and mind go haywire. You’re sure if you were hooked up to a heart monitor it would be going crazy. His lips move against yours and his hands move from your face to your waist pulling you closer. You wind your arms around his neck, and push your hand into his hair, pulling slightly and you smile when you hear the small moan escape his throat. You relish in his soft lips on yours and you melt into his chest. 

Finally, you pull away a few inches. You both breathe heavily, chests bumping into each other as they expand. He smiles joyously, before pecking you softly again. 

“Fuck,” he breathes out, “I’ve been wanting to do that for so long.”

“And I’ve wanted you to do that so long,” you confess and he smiles. 

“Well in that case.” He leans in again and you gladly meet his lips halfway. 

If the first kiss was sweet this one is intense. He moves his hands to the back of your thighs and picks you up. You gasp but wrap your legs around him before attaching your lips again. He carries you to the couch and lays you down on it softly without breaking the kiss. You make out until you feel like your lungs may implode from the lack of air, but even then you don’t pull away, his lips more of a necessity than oxygen. Your head spins, and you push him lightly making him pull away, but he catches your hand on his chest pinning it above your head. 

“I’m not done with you just yet, princess.” His voice is husky and you groan. 

“Holy shit finally.” 

Both of your heads snap to the front door where Jimin and Tae are standing with bags of take-out in their hands.

You both scramble to sit up, Jungkook falling off of the couch in surprise. 

Taehyung gapes at you and Jimin looks at you smugly. 

You blush but the only thing that crosses your muddled brain is where the fuck did they get a key. 

.

.

.

“A sewer?” 

“Wrong”

“A lake?” 

“Nope.” 

“Ugh… just tell me.” You’ve been trying to guess the answer to this ongoing dispute and Jungkook has not given you even one hint. 

“Where’s the fun in me telling you hmm?” He replies, where he is sitting behind you, his legs on either side of you.

You’re both on the couch, the TV casting a glow over the living room as you sit in the dark. It started with you watching a movie but when he finally came home it didn’t take 5 minutes until he pulled you into him, and started playing with your hair. 

Ever since you two kissed and confessed, he’s been finding every excuse possible to have you as close as possible, it’s like he wants to be touching you  at all times. One would think you’d mind but you definitely don’t.

 “There I finished.” He proclaims happily, taking a picture and showing it to you. 

On the screen is a very messy-looking french braid and you grimace in your mind at the untangling that is waiting for you later tonight, or is it later this morning? 

“It looks great hey?” Jungkook asks for reassurance when you haven’t said anything. He looks so proud how can you not smile widely at him. 

“It looks amazing Kookie.” You laugh, turning around fully and kissing him on the cheek.

You’ve both been making an effort to spend as much time together as possible. A very hard feat as he is away most of the day and night and you are studying most of the time. But you finally found the sweet spot just past 3 am. He tries to be home and you set an alarm to wake up in time. 

It was one of the nights when he was late that you were sitting on the couch braiding your hair for lack of something else to do. He came walking in with a limp, he tripped and fell while chasing Jimin, you swear this boy is one of the clumsiest people you have ever met. When he saw you braiding your hair he immediately asked you to teach him. He’s still perfecting it, so he likes to practice as much as possible. 

“I think I should grow my hair out,” He says, pulling on his hair as if it will become longer. “ Then I can braid my own hair.” The strands he was pulling fall into his face and he blows them away unsuccessfully. 

“I think it’ll look cute if you did,” You push the hair out of his face, “ Then you can wear it in a lot of styles.”

“Yeah, I’ll think about it.” He smiles and takes your hand that was playing with his hair, turning it around and starts to pepper kisses on your palm. 

“That tickles.” You try to pull away giggling but he just pulls you closer, until you are finally face level with him. 

He cups your face softly and smiles, leaning in to kiss you. Your lips meet in a sweet soft kiss and you pull away after a few seconds. He follows with his lips and you giggle at him. 

“That’s just mean.” He pouts and you smile, giving him a peck to make up for it. 

Jungkook smiles widely, wrapping his arms around you and hugging you tightly. He sighs in content. 

“I never thought when I met you that I would be lucky enough to be able to do this.” You look at him only to see him smiling softly, as he leans his head on top of yours. 

“ I also never thought you would be lucky enough.” You joke. 

“Is that so huh?” He laughs wrapping his legs around you as he starts to tickle you. His finger dancing over your sides.  

“Never be this lucky huh?” He laughs while you squeal from his tickling fingers, squirming to try and get away. But his legs and arms are locking you in. 

“Okay, okay.” You exclaim trying to breathe through the laughter. He stops his fingers poised to attack again mere centimeters away from your sides.

“ What?” He leans closer so that his ear is right beside your mouth, “ i don’t think I heard you.”

“I said, okay, you were always going to be so lucky.” You lay it on thick and he seems pleased, laughing at you. 

He hums wrapping his arms tightly around you and pulling you into his chest.

“ Of course you wouldn’t be bale to resist my charms.” He kisses the top of your head when you scoff. “But truth is I would never have been able to resist yours.” You can feel his lips stretch into a smile on top of your head and it causes you to smile. 

Your phone vibrates and you frown. Who would be texting you at this time? Jungkook hands you your phone and you check it. 

“Why is she awake?” You mumble, and frown.

“Who?” Jungkook inquiries. Tilting his head to see your screen. 

“My sister,” You turn the phone so he can read the message. “She is inviting me to her first game this weekend.”

“O, that’s nice are you going to go?” Jungkook asks seeing that you haven’t replied to her yet.

“I don’t know,” you groan. “I mean I haven’t seen her in so long and i miss her terribly, but I don’t know, I have class on Friday afternoon and getting there and back again at night is going to be a pain.” You wish you had a car but with everything so close to your apartment you never saw the need, until now. 

“Hmm…” Jungkook hums. “You can think about it tomorrow.” he states and pulls the phone from your hand and tucks your head underneath his chin again. You decide he is right, there is no use in worrying yourself about it now.

You relish in the moment. In the feel of his arms around you, his skin on yours and his cheek pressed on top of your head. You close your eyes and breath in. You smile softly as his scent invades your nose. Jungkook smells just so Jungkook, his laundry detergent mixed with something else you can never place your finger on. All you know is that it smells amazing, and you nuzzle closer into his chest. 

The warmth radiates off of him, keeping you warm and his sweater underneath you cheek is soft. Your eyes are starting to get heavy, the time catching up to you, you peak at the clock. Just past 4 am, you guess it’s okay for you to sleep now. You wiggle until you're comfortable. Jungkook’s chest is rising and falling rhythmically, giving away the fact that he is also sleeping. You lightly close your eyes, ready to wake up cuddling later today. 

That thought is wrenched from your head just like your comfortable pillow, when Jungkook slips off the couch in surprise at his phone’s ringing, breaking the soft silence that occupied the space mere moments ago. You follow Jungkook to the floor, but quickly get up to help him search for his phone, that he finds a minute later holding it above his head triumphantly, before realising he has to answer the still ringing phone. 

His expression changes from sleepy and smiling to cold and serious as he listens to the person talking on the other side. You frown in confusion but he shakes his head getting up from the floor all while talking low and in short sentences that give nothing away about what they are speaking about. 

You know this routine, Jungkook’s work calls him at all hours of the day and night. You tried to convince him that he should quit but he refused, saying that finding a new job now is only going to stress him out. You don’t understand at all but you decided not to push, however the bunch of job ads on your laptop is ready when he is. 

“Sorry baby, I have to leave, apparently someone disappeared while on duty.” He explains pulling on his jacket and racing forward to give you a kiss on the cheek. 

“Okay, be safe.” You call after him. He gives you one last smile and disappears through the door. 

You sit in the quiet apartment for a while, thinking everything over. The past months have really thrown everything around,  but you couldn’t be happier about it. You can’t believe there was a time that you didn’t even speak to Jungkook. 

Everyone always calls him intimidating but you so easily got the sweet side to him you can’t understand what Jimin and Taehyung means when they say Jungkook can be scary and people are afraid of him. Sure you’ve seen him irritated but what they’re describing sounds more like people are really afraid of him.  He always denies it though and argues with them. They usually give up very easily, especially when they are reminded of your presence. You guess he doesn’t want you to think badly of him. 

You don’t think it would be possible to think badly of Jungkook, he is so sweet, so compassionate and so understanding. He goes out of his way to help you study and supports you before tests by always making you coffee. 

You get up, getting the sticky notes you now have an abundance of at all times. You write him a message for when he gets home, you know you’ll probably be asleep when he gets back. 

The notes have morphed from just telling each other when you’re going out to becoming a full conversation tool. Since you both struggle to see each other, missing each other some days completely you started leaving notes as a way of saying good morning, reminding the other of something or just give them a nice message for the day. The warning to not die or to avoid something horrible during the other’s absence is still a necessity. 

You smile and stick the note to his bedroom door. Taehyung has on multiple occasions double checked on both of your phones that you do actually understand the concept of texting. He gagged evey time at what he calls the “sickly sweet” messages between you two. Reminded of that, you do send him a text to be safe, before your get into bed. 

In bed, cozy and warm you finally fall asleep after two true crime videos.

.

.

.

Becky is rambling again. This time about how her parents won’t buy her a new car after she crashed hers. You roll your eyes when she isn’t looking and nod your head when she is. 

“I mean the crash wasn’t even my fault the other car wasn’t suppose to be there. Who parks in designated parking anyway?” She continues, even though you've long been blocking out her words.

You realise she is waiting for a response. 

“Yeah definitely.” you say to please her and she’s off again. 

Your mind wanders to your sister. You had to tell you couldn’t come to her game tonight and the sadness in her voice still hurts you every time you think about it. Maybe you should just go. You can take a taxi, but you already cringe at the amount of money that would be. You could ask your parents but you feel guilty. They are already paying your rent, and your studies prevent you from getting a job, so you can’t contribute to anything. At least you have a scholarship, you guess. 

“O my god.” Becky exclaims and it takes you a moment to realise she’s stopped walking. You frown at her, wondering what made her stop. “He has friends!” She pulls you closer and you frown finally looking up to see what she is looking at. 

Your eyes land on Jungkook, Taehyung and Jimin, who are all stood at the road, leaning against a car. When Jungkook sees you he smiles but the smile drops when he sees who you’re with. He whispers something to his friends who immediately look up from their phones. 

“Come on.” Becky’s nails are digging into your arm as she pulls you forward to the three waiting men. 

“I know you know that one but you have to introduce me to his friends okay?” She hisses into your ear, before throwing her brightest smile at the men. 

You grimace a bit at the thought of introducing them, your worst fear suddenly becoming her dating Taehyung or Jimin. She pulls you along until you’re standing in front of them. 

“Hey ba…” Jungkook can’t even greet you before Becky is chipping in. 

“Hey I’m sure you remember me, we met a few weeks ago.” She smiles at Jungkook. “But I haven’t had the pleasure to meet your friends. Right Y/n?” She squeezes your arm painfully and you wince, smiling awkwardly. 

“Right uhm..this is Jimin and this is Taehyung.” You gesture to the two men hoping she’ll release her hold on you now. You’re not that lucky. 

“Jimin, Taehyung.” She smiles dazzlingly. “ it’s so nice to meet you I’m…” 

“Becky.” Jimin finishes her sentence for her, glaring at her. 

“We know.” Taehyung adds mimicking his friend’s expression. 

Becky tilts her head to the side at their hostility, the smile still on her face as if cemented there. 

“Baby why don’t we get going?” Jungkook asks you, placing his hand on the arm that Becky is still clinging to, forcing her to remove her hands from you. Jungkook pulls you to his side, wrapping an arm around you as soon as you're next to him. 

“Baby?” Becky gasps in surprise. “Wow, are you guys dating?” Becky exclaims, her voice sickly sweet. 

“Yes we are.” Jungkook answers with an eyebrow raised, irritation seeping out of him. 

“You sure do have an interesting taste in girls.” Becky comments and looks you up and down her eyes judging you but as soon as she turns back to the men she’s all smiles again. 

Jungkook must have noticed because his hold on you tightens. 

“We should go on a double date sometime.” She winks at Jimin.

“Yeah you’re definitely not my type,” Jimin responds scoffing walking away from her to get in the car without a second glance. 

Becky gasps, bawling her hands into fists. Her smile is gone and instead her face is screwed up like a toddler’s who is about to throw a tantrum. She gasps for words but in the time it takes her to arrange her thoughts Jungkook is dragging you into the car before driving off. 

“Can you imagine the audacity of her.” Jimin rants.

“And the way she insulted you in front of us.” Taehyung adds. 

“It’s okay guys don’t worry.” You try to calm them down. The whole situation makes you laugh. “Thanks for teaching her a lesson.” You look to the backseat with a smile and both men seem to be placated for now. 

“Are you okay?” Jungkook asks, glancing at you before returning his gaze back onto the road. 

You sigh, “yeah I’m okay,” you stroke your arm where she was holding you. “ who knew fake nails could hurt so much.” You chuckle looking at Jungkook only to see his jaw clenching. 

“She hurt you?” He asks and you shrug. 

“Do you want us to kill her?” Taehyung pipes up and you laugh at the suggestion. 

“Thanks but Jungkook already offered.” You laugh and it makes Jungkook smile at the memory. 

“Wait,” you frown suddenly realising you’re in a car driving somewhere. “Where are we going? And whose car is this?” 

“We’re kidnapping you.” Jimin jokes and you frown in confusion. 

“No really where are we going?” You chuckle but they shake their heads. 

“Just trust us okay?” Jungkook says squeezing your thigh, leaving his one hand there while he drives, causing you to blush.

The rest of the drive is filled with you begging them to tell you where you’re going but they never budge. 

When you finally arrive you frown. What are you doing at a school? 

You hesitantly follow the boys’ lead and get out of the car. There are people everywhere, teenagers walking in little groups laughing, adults chasing after smaller children as they run to the food stands. There is excitement in the air you can feel it and it isn’t until a certain pair of faces catch your eye that you realise where you are. How could you not have figured it out sooner. 

Your mom and dad come rushing towards you, smiles plastered onto their faces and you feel your face mimicking theirs immediately. 

“Hi…” You barely get the word out before your dad pulls you into a bearhug. His arms tightening around your body and you let out a squeak signaling that you can’t breath. 

“O sorry honey,” He chuckles and release you, giving your mom the chance to pull you into a less squishy hug. 

“I can’t believe you came,” Your mother grins, brushing some of your hair back into place, “ Lilly is going to be so happy, what changed your mind?” 

You blush. “ It’s less of my doing and more of theirs.” You point to the three boys behind your parents who have been watching the scene with pleased smiles. “Mom, dad,” You walk to Jungkook when your parents turn at your pointing finger, “ This is Jungkook, my… roommate.” You glance at him afraid he’ll be angry at you for not introducing him as your boyfriend or something but he just smiles brightly, his nose scrunching up and you almost melt. 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He sticks out his hand for your parents to shake, your dad smile at him shaking his hand and your mom throws you a look. You groan inwardly you already know that look, it’s basically saying “ why didn’t you tell me he is so good looking?”.  You give her a look back trying to prevent her from asking all her questions out loud. 

“Well Jungkook it’s so nice to finally put a face to the name,” your dad says happily 

“And who came with you?” Your mom asks looking past you at Jimin and Taehyung who has now taken a bunch of signs out of the back of the car. 

“O this is my friends,” Jungkook gestures, “ This is Jimin and Taehyung, they wanted to come support Y/n’s little sister with us.” 

“O isn’t that lovely,” Your mom says clutching her heart, clearly moved by the sweetness. 

“Don’t get it wrong Ma’m this was all Jungkook’s idea, we just made the signs.” Jimin smiles and turns the sign in his hand around to show your sister's name in glitter. You look at them in surprise, they probably made all of this last night, and you can feel your chest getting warm from the emotions bubbling up in you. You turn to Jungkook and he awkwardly rubs the back of his neck. 

He leans down to whisper to you while your parents fret over the Jimin and Taehyung’s effort. “They went a bit overboard.” He blushes slightly and you just shake your head. “I love it, thank you.” You want to kiss him but your dad is already there stuffing one of the signs in your hands.

“Come on you two the game is about to start.” Your dad proclaims, nodding to your mom who is  already walking to the bleachers with Jimin and Taehyung in tow. You and Jungkook follow quickly and as soon as you find your seats, the teams come rushing onto the field. 

“Which one is your sister?” Jungkook asks over the screams of the crowd and you point to Lilly.

Her hair is dyed blonde at the moment making her easy to find as the light bounces off it. She turns to the bleachers searching and you wave holding up the sign in your hands. You can see the exact moment she finds you because her eyes light up and a huge grin forms on her face, she follows the signs with her name on it and frown for a second at the three boys holding the others, lifting an eyebrow at you before her teammates drag her into huddle. 

“She looks like you.” Taehyung leans over Jungkook to tell you and you roll your eyes. Everyone says it but you and your sister have never seen the resemblance. Maybe it’s because you’re both so different in personality that it makes you unable to see the physical similarities. 

“Did you play sports in school Y/n?” Jungkook asks. 

At his question your mom dad laughs. “ No, Y/n-bear has always been the studying type.” He ruffles your hair and you groan. “She fell asleep in the library so often the librarian had our number.” Your dad jokes and you cringe. 

“Dad…” You whine and the three boys next to you burst out laughing. 

“Y/n-bear huh.” Jungkook giggles and you cringe and stick out your tongue at him. 

“As if your parents don’t have a embarrassing nickname for you.” You counter but his smile drops for a second, before coming back. 

“We just call him Kookie.” Jimin pipes up causing Jungkook to blush. 

“Or Bambi because when we met him he had these huge eyes.” Taehyung joins in smirking as Jungkook groans, clearly enjoying teasing the younger boy. Jungkook playfully smack him in retaliation and Taehyung is just about to fight back when the whistle blows, signaling the start of the game. 

The game is a stressful one, the two teams keeping the score even. You cheer with every goal you’re sister’s team scores and you have to physically calm your dad down from yelling at the referee when he makes a bad call, only to find the other three men yelling along with him. At some point in the game, Jungkook’s hand finds yours and you intertwine your fingers together. You’re jumping up and down in celebration of another goal when you turn to him smiling wide to find him staring at you. The intense look on his face makes you blush. 

“What ?” You ask a little out of breath but he just shakes his head. 

“ I think I might be in trouble,” He whispers in your ear and you frown in confusion. 

“Why?” You cock your head to the side, staring into his eyes. 

“Because,” he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, “ I can’t help but think every time I see you, how much I love you.” 

The bleachers burst out in an eruption of cheers as the end whistle blows signaling your sister’s win. But all you can hear is Jungkook’s confession ringing in your ears. You’re both staring into each other’s eyes and you’re about to reply when your dad pulls you into a hug, cheering for your sister, and starts to drag you down to the field to go congratulate her in person. You look back to see Jungkook softly smiling at you as Jimin and Taehyung jump onto him for a group hug. 

As soon as your sister sees you she is running to you at full speed, crashing into you and making you stumble back. 

“Did you see I scored the winning goal!” she exclaims and her teammates burst into cheers again around her. 

“I saw Lils I saw.” you lie, it’s not like you’re going to tell her you missed it because you just heard Jungkook say he loves you for the first time. 

“O my god, I can’t believe you’re here, I’m so glad you came.” she gushes, shaking you and jumping up and down. In moments like these she reminds you a lot of a hyperactive puppy. She suddenly stops, looking over your shoulder and you turn to see what she’s looking at. “Who are they?” she asks and you smile when your eyes land on Jungkook and his friends.

“That’s…” 

“Hi, I’m Jimin, wow I’m a huge fan the way you just scored that goal amazing, just amazing!” Jimin interrupts you before you can even introduce him. 

“Right, that was awesome who knew Y/n’s little sister is such a badass.” Taehyung joins Jimin. “Im Taehyung by the way we’re Y/n’s friends.” 

“I didn’t know my sister had such gorgeous friends wow,” Your sister blurts out without a bit of shame. “Did you make the signs? I loved them by the way.” 

They both nod enthusiastically and she hugs them both. Your sister has never been the shy type, she shows how she’s feeling without a care, which is very nice when she’s happy but can be a pain in the ass when she’s mad. Jimin and Taehyung don’t seem to mind though and they happily accept the physical contact. 

“Lilly this is Jungkook.” You finally get her attention back to you. Her eyes widen at the mention of his name.

“So you’re my sister’s roommate?” She asks and when he nods she jumps up an down clapping her hands. “She told me a lot about you, it’s so nice to meet you.”

Jungkook chuckles, glancing at you at the new information. “It’s nice to meet you too, I’d love to hear all about the things your sister has been telling you.” He smirks and she laughs. 

“O yeah, I’ll tell you but come meet my teammates first they’ve all been distracted by the three hot guys on the bleachers.” Jungkook barely has a moment to react before Lilly is dragging him, Tae and Jimin to her friends. You just stand and laugh, ignoring their pleading stares for help as they are bombarded by teenage girls.

“Fancy meeting you here Y/n.” A voice next to you makes you jump and you look to the side, only to find a man who looks strangely familiar. You rack your brain and when you finally figure out how you know him, you freeze. It’s that creepy guy from the elevator. 

“I haven’t seen you around the building, have you been avoiding me?” Damion asks his voice making it sound like he’s hurt but his eyes are as cold as ever. 

“What are you doing here?” You blurt out, confused and you’ll admit a little bit scared.

“O my niece is in the other team, she asked me to come watch her game,” He waves his hand as if to brush off the accusatory tone in your voice. His eyes fall onto the scene behind you, “Is that your sister?” He asks innocently and you only nod. “She looks just like you.” He smiles but it sends a chill down your spine, he leans closer and you cringe back but his hand is holding you in place. “I’d love to meet her one day, “ he whispers.

“Y/n!” Lilly’s voice makes you look towards where she is beckoning you closer, you sigh out in relief to have an excuse to get away from Damion but when you turn to say something he’s gone. 

You shake your head a little to clear it and plaster on a smile. You walk to where Lilly and your parents are standing. 

“Hey you okay?” Jungkook asks when you’re close enough and you just nod. 

“Yeah I’m fine, just a bit cold.” You lie, although the night has turned chilly and without missing a beat Jungkook takes off his jacket and drapes it around you.  

“Y/n are you and the boys going to join us for post game celebrations?” Your mom asks, and you sigh.

“I’m sorry guys but I have a test coming up.” You bite your lip feeling bad. 

“You can miss one night of studying right?” Lilly interjects, “ I still want to hang out with you.” She pouts and it breaks your heart to have to say no. 

“Come now Lilly you know how hard your sister has to study, we don’t want to keep her out too late.” Your dad scolds her but your sister’s face doesn’t change. 

“We’ll come visit again,” Jungkook says trying to soothe her and she looks at him surprised. 

“Yeah and then we can go out to get ice cream or something.” You pipe up gratefully. “I promise.” You hold out your pinky finger and after a second she takes it in her own. 

“Okay, fine but you all have to come again.” She looks to Jimin and Tae too and they smile promising her. 

You all walk back to the together. Lilly who now seems much more satisfied is leading the way talking animatedly to Jungkook and Jimin while Taehyung is taking up your father’s attention , talking about god knows what. 

“He’s a very nice young man.” Your mom says looping her arm through yours while she stares at Jungkook laughing at something Lilly said. 

“Yeah he is.” You agree happy to know your mom likes him. If you were to tell her of your relationship with Jungkook you’re at least sure she’ll approve.

“You two make a good couple.” You look at her in surprise. “Mom…” 

“ O please save it,  do you think I’m blind?” She asks amused and you shake your head on impulse.  “ the way you two look at each other  is enough to make anyone see that you’re absolutely crazy for each other.” 

You blush and she coos, “O my sweet Y/n has her first boyfriend.” She squishes your face in her hands and you shake loose of her hold. “Mom stop it.” you whine but she just giggles. 

“I’m glad you’re happy sweety.” 

“Me too Mom,” you smile, “and I am really happy.” She nods and you say goodbye quickly, the others already waiting at the car. 

You hug your dad and with one last squishy hug from Lilly you get in the car. Although you love your family you can’t wait to get back to the apartment, because you have something very important to do. 

Jimin and Taehyung say goodbye to you in the street because they have to return the car that they apparently borrowed from Hobi, though you don’t know how loosely they used the term borrowed. So it’s just you and Jungkook who goes up to the apartment. 

“Jungkook…” The front door closes behind you. He turns around and you throw yourself into his arms. “Thank you so much for tonight.” You mumble into his chest, holding him tighter. 

You feel his chuckle reverberate through his chest. “ It’s a pleasure, I’m just glad your parents seem to like me,” he pulls away so that he can see your face, “they do like me right?”

You laugh. Is that what he was worrying about tonight? “Are you kidding my mom loves you.” 

Jungkook breathes out dramatically. “O thank god, otherwise we would have to be star-crossed lovers.” He smirks and you roll your eyes, earning a kiss on the forehead from him. 

“I did want to talk to you actually.” You bite your lip, looking away feeling shy all of a sudden. 

Jungkook lifts his eyebrows. “That doesn’t sound good.” He leads you to the couch to sit down, his hands holding yours.

“It’s nothing bad I promise it’s just after what you said on the bleachers well…” 

Jungkook interrupts you. “Y/n it’s okay, you don’t have to say it back if you don’t want to.” 

“No that’s not it I…”

“I didn’t say it for an answer I said it that you know how I feel.” He rambles.

“No Jungkook…” 

He isn’t looking at you but he continues to talk. “I mean I know it’s probably too soon to say it, we haven’t been dating that long but…”

 “Jungkook!” his gaze snap to you in surprise and you smile. “I’m trying to say that I love you too.” You watch in amusement as his face morphs from shocked to blushing and then it lands on something else.

“Say it again.” His eyes are hooded and he is leaning towards you.

“What?” You’re confused, your eyebrows furrowing. 

He raises your hands over your head causing you to fall back onto the couch. He leans over you now, smirking and his stare intense. 

“Say,” he kisses your cheek, “it”, he kisses your jaw, “again.” His lips find your neck and you squirm a bit.

“I love you.” You say breathlessly, he removes his lips from your neck to look at you. 

“Good girl.” Is all he says before his lips captures yours. You can feel yourself melt and butterflies erupt in your stomach at his words. He bites your bottom lip lightly and you moan, causing him to smile. His lips are hot against yours, impatient in its movements as if he can’t get enough of you. 

You tug at his hand that is still holding your wrists and he lets go, only for you to thread them into his hair pulling lightly. He groans and wraps his arms around your back pulling you onto his lap. 

You’ve made out before of course but something was different tonight it’s as if you’re both starving for each other. You tug at his shirt’s hem and he gets the message because he rips it off before pulling you closer again. You place your hand on his chest and gasp at the warmth of his skin underneath your palms. You lightly drag your nails down his chest and he moans into your mouth when it rests at the waistband of his pants.

He pulls away slightly giving you both a moment to breathe. “ Baby wait.” He takes your hand on his pants in his own, holding it against his chest. 

“Why?” You pout and he chuckles. 

“I really want to do this, really want to, but we can’t on the couch.” He explains and your mind immediately goes to the many times Taehyung and Jimin have burst into the apartment and found you both on the couch in compromising positions like this. 

“Fine,” You say and get up from his lap, holding out your hand for him, “Your bed or mine?” 

He smirks and picks you up. You gasp and wrap your legs around his waist as he carries you into his room, making sure to lock the door behind him.

.

.

.

You impatiently tap your fingers on the counter waiting for the coffee machine. You were too lazy to put on any real clothes not seeing the point so you’re dressed in one of Jungkook’s hoodies and socks. A podcast is playing over your headphones and you already have a cup ready in your hand. You’re taking a break from studying but you know you’ll probably finish the coffee in your room  in what is now essentially just your study, seeing as you don’t sleep in there anymore. You smile lightly at the memory of this morning, a relaxed sunny morning filled with soft kisses and cuddles. That is until you finally had to tear yourself away to go to class and Jungkook had to go to work. You got back from class a few hours ago but your boyfriend still hasn’t returned. His note had said he’ll probably be home late, so you’re not worried, but you wish you knew what he was busy with. 

Even after all this time you still didn’t know what exactly his job is. He would always tip-toe around the question claiming that he does a lot of things, odd jobs really, but you feel like he isn’t telling you the full truth. You don’t see a reason to confront him about it though, because what job could possibly be a bad one right?

You’re so lost in thought you don’t even feel the presence behind you until arms wrap around you. 

You scream, hurling around only to find a giggling Jungkook behind you. 

Jungkook takes out the headphones in your ears. “ You should be careful, I could have been a murderer.” He jokes.

You roll your eyes. “I knew you were there the entire time.” Which of course is a lie, you had no idea that someone was in the apartment. 

“Yeah?” You nod profusely.

 Jungkook pulls you closer. “Then why did you scream?” He smirks knowing that you’re lying. 

You open your mouth to reply but you can’t really think of anything to say so you close it again to his amusement. 

“Yeah I thought so.” He smiles at you. You stare at his smile. It always makes you smile too, the way his whole face lights up and you’re sure you can stare at him forever when he looks at you the way he is now.

“That doesn’t matter anyway,” you pull him closer, “because now that you’re home, we can spend the rest of the night together.” 

He raises his eyebrows, “Yeah? what did you have in mind hmm?” He is smirking again, backing you up until your back meets the counter, caging you in. His eyes are hooded, gone is the bunny smiling man and instead he looks like a predator, waiting for you to make the first move.

You smirk, and pull him closer until your lips meet. You kiss him sweetly but after a moment you rack your fingers into his hair pulling him even closer and deepening the kiss. He moans lightly into your mouth and you smirk pulling away. 

“Maybe we should watch a movie?” You say innocently trying to escape his hold but he doesn’t relent.

“O no you’re not getting away that easily. I come home and you’re only in my hoodie,” He tugs at the fabric lightly. “I’m definitely not watching a movie with you like this.” 

You shrug. “ Fine by me.” You giggle, leaning in for another kiss but he suddenly grimaces in pain. 

“Jungkook?” You question as he grips onto his leg. 

“Just give me a moment okay?” He says, his eyes a bit panicked, you nod and he backs away. You catch sight of his hand when it leaves his black covered leg and you’ve been patching him up so much you can easily see the red liquid that coats it. 

Your eyes go wide. “Jungkook is that blood?” You move closer to him but he moves back. 

“It’s fine, don’t worry.” He replies, but you’re not so easily convinced. 

“Let me see.” You command but he shakes his head. “Jungkook let me see.” You use your doctor voice and he sighs. 

“We better go to the bathroom then.” He looks worried which makes you worry, but you help him to the bathroom where he sits down on the closed toilet. You kneel in front of him.

Now that you’re closer you can see the wet stain that is growing by the second. And you gasp when he removes his pants and you get a good look at the wound. The skin is peeled away on his thigh leaving a long deep gash and a bunch of bruising around it. It isn’t something you’ve seen before in person.

“Jungkook what happened?” You sound a bit hysteric even to your own ears. 

Jungkook curses when he sees it. “I thought he missed.” He mumbles.

“Missed what?” You ask stupidly, staring up at Jungkook. 

“I got mugged again.” He tries to explain but you see the way he looks away not meeting your eyes. 

“Okay either you’re the most unlucky person ever that gets mugged a lot or you’re lying to me.” You know it’s the latter. Unlike the first time that he came home bleeding you now know him well enough to know when he is lying. 

“Y/n…” He pleads for you to not press but you’ve had enough. 

“Jungkook, I’ve been quiet every time you come home injured, I patch you up and let it go but this looks like a bullet grazed you.” There is no other injury you can think of that will look like this. You look at him waiting for him to deny it but he just sighs. 

“Y/n can’t you just patch me up and forget about it?” He sounds angry but you can see that it’s just clouding panic. 

“No, tell me what happened.” You demand. “I’m your girlfriend don’t you think I’m at least entitled to the truth?” 

He shakes his head. “You shouldn’t know the truth.” He says it through clenched teeth and you frown. 

“You really don’t think I deserve to know the truth?” You raise your voice, getting angry now. Why can’t he just tell you? 

“That’s not what I’m saying, it’s just better that you don’t know the truth.” He is getting angry now too. 

“That makes no sense, did this happen because of your job?” You can’t think of another explanation as to why he keeps getting hurt like this. 

He glares at you and for the first time ever you see his scary gaze directed at you. “That has nothing to do with you.” He growls and you flinch. He looks like he regrets it immediately but you don’t look at him. Instead you start disinfecting the wound. 

You don’t react when he tries to get your attention throughout the process, you just wrap up his injury and when you’re done you stand up without a word. 

Jungkook grabs your wrist and you stare at him. “ Wait, I’m sorry. Can we just talk about this?” 

“I don’t want to hear anymore lies Jungkook.” You retort but he doesn’t let you go. 

He gulps and bites his lip, clearly struggling. “If I tell you what happen you’ll run away from me.” He says it with such certainty that you hesitate for a second. He sounds so sad. 

“You won’t know that unless you tell me, besides you should know me better than to think I’d just leave you because you told me the truth,” you try to wrench your hand away from him, but he stands up winching a bit. 

“Okay, I’ll tell you but all I’m asking is that you remember what you just said.” You nod, now a bit scared because Jungkook looks so anxious. 

You wait for him on the couch while he changes into some pants. He comes out without a shirt on and you frown at all the bruises on his torso. There are some cuts too but they’re not very deep. Once again you see the white scars, you noticed that first time.

Jungkook stands sheepishly at the entrance to the hallway as if unsure whether to sit or run away. 

“Do you want coffee?” He asks hesitantly.

“ Jungkook stop stalling please,” You sigh, “Just come sit down.” You just want to know what is happening.

He sighs and walks slowly to sit on the couch, keeping the distance between you two, which you’re thankful for.

You sit in silence waiting for Jungkook to say something but he sits hunched over scratching at his cuticles and avoids looking at you. 

“Jungkook the longer you take the more my head is jumping to conclusions,” You break the silence trying to spur him on to speak.

“Yeah?” He still doesn't look at you. “Like what?” 

You stare at him. “I don’t know,” You throw up your hands, “ like that you’re a serial killer or something.” 

Jungkook chuckles humorlessly. “I’m not a serial killer Y/n.” 

“Then what can be so bad?” You question, leaning in closer to him, not seeing a way that something can be worse. 

Jungkook takes a deep breath in. “I’m in the mafia Y/n.” He glances at you waiting for your reaction. 

To his surprise you laugh. “Okay, sure Kook you’re in the mafia.” You watch him, waiting for him to laugh too and give up the joke but he just stares at you seriously. 

“O my god,” It takes a minute to sink in, “ that's how you know how to hide a body isn’t it?.” 

“ Well I don’t actually do the hiding bit.” He chuckles again still glancing at you nervously picking at his fingers. 

You just stare at him. Everything feels cold all of a sudden. “Then what bit do you do?”

But you don’t give him a chance to respond something dawning on you. “O my god, you’ve killed people before haven’t you?” 

Jungkook just looks away, his reaction all answer you need. 

You pull your legs further away from him, into your chest, moving as far away from him on the couch as possible.

 Jungkook, your Jungkook is in the mafia, is a murderer. You can’t wrap your head around how the sweet, bunny-smiling man you love is capable of any of that. The man who showers you with kisses in the morning to wake you up. The man that makes you pancakes and coffee before a test, that braids your hair after you shower.  You don’t know what to think or do. Should you run? Should you call the police? You just don’t know. All you do know is that you suddenly feel the need to be as far away from him as possible. For the first time ever you feel scared being in his presence. 

“Please don’t run away,” he asks you, his hand twitching as if to hold onto you but he retracts it, “Remember you promised.”

“Yeah I promised because I thought you were going to tell me you're a stripper or something, not that you're in the mafia.” You sound a bit hysterical, unsure of what to think or do, your head running a thousand miles an hour. 

Finally you decide. You stand up from the couch, and you can see the hurt written all over his face. 

You sigh. “I’m not running away, I just… I need a moment to think okay?” 

He just nods. “Do you want me to leave?” 

You shake your head  “No, I don’t know, maybe? I just don’t know anything right now okay.”  

You turn on your heels and walk to your room, leaving him on the couch. 

You close the door to your room and you sink to the floor. You have to process what you just heard. You finally found out the truth and now you wonder if your should have just been kept in the dark. Maybe it would have been easier. No, you decide it’s better that you know.

In some ways you feel stupid. All the late nights calls, him coming home with various injuries and vague explanations. Even the tip-toeing around what his actual job is. You feel like a fool for not at least expecting it to be a possibility. But how could you have it feels so unreal and yet it is the reality, no changing that.

 You just have to decide what to do now, so you go sit down at your desk, throwing all your notes on the floor and pulling out a clean piece of paper. You draw a line down the middle. A pros and cons list. 

You laugh humorlessly at yourself. You used to do this when you had to decide whether to join the debate team or decathlon team, not whether you should stay with your mafia boyfriend or not. Is he even your boyfriend anymore? Do you want him to be? 

You sit with the pen tip pushed on the page but you can’t write. Of course the cons are obvious. You stay with him and know that he is doing illegal things every day. You stay with him knowing you could be putting yourself in danger as well. But you can’t come to a conclusion even though the cons outweigh the pros. The only pro is that you love him.

You’re a logical person, you always have been, so it should be easy when you look at the list, but you just can’t get the sad look on his face out of your head. The way he didn’t want to tell you because he was so sure you would leave him. 

It’s happened before you realise. He wasn’t keeping this from you just because he didn’t want to tell you but because he didn’t want you to leave. You think of all the things he’s done for you, walking you home after class because it was getting dark. Taking you to see your sister’s game just because he knew you were sad to miss it. Taking care of you while you were sick. That man wasn’t someone malicious. So who is the real Jungkook then?  

You start to look at it differently. From a different angle the way your dad always told you to do when you were struggling with something. You don’t know the full story, you don’t know how he got sucked into this life. 

Finally you get up. If you’re going to make a decision you need to know everything. 

.

.

.

You knock on his door a few hours later. You can hear shuffling inside and finally it opens. Jungkook’s hair is disheveled as if he’s been tugging at it and his eyes are red like he’s been crying. Behind him you can see bags half packed. 

“What are you doing?” You ask, suddenly panicking that he is packing.

“You said you needed space so I thought I’d make everything easier for you and leave.” He says sniveling a little bit. 

“Jungkook I didn’t mean you have to move out I just needed some time that’s all.” Even now you have the urge to hug him to make him feel better. 

“Does that mean you want me to stay?” He asks hopefully. 

“It means I want to know everything.” He frowns in confusion. “I want to know what happened how this all happened.” 

He nods and step aside inviting you in. “Well then you better sit down it’s kind of a long story.” 

You enter his room, that just a few hours ago was the room you shared with him. How ironic that just his morning you were tangled up in his bed with him and now you’re sitting on it waiting to hear him tell you how he got into the mafia. 

He sits down next to you, still keeping space between you two as if too scared to sit near you. 

He sighs and racks his fingers through his hair. “I haven't told anybody this, the only people who knows are my Hyungs.” 

You frown. “ Wait so Jimin and Taehyung are also in this?” You can’t believe it. But he holds up his hand, stopping you from asking anymore questions, and even though your head is full of them, you keep quiet.

“I’ll get to that part but I guess I have to start at the beginning.” He sighs before looking at you. 

“My childhood wasn’t like yours, there were no picnics and movie nights or family dinners. My dad wasn’t a good person. He would beat me up daily. I remember him locking me in a closet because I was afraid of the dark when I was 5, saying that it will teach me a lesson.” You gasp not even being able to imagine what that must have been like. 

“He would punish me for the most basic things, and as I got older it only got worse.” He grimaces at the memories. 

“My mom on the other hand was the best. She tried to intervene even if it meant getting hurt herself. She would sneak me food when my dad refused to give me any, and every year on my birthday she would make me a small cake, just enough for me and her.”

 He smiles softly. “ She tried her best, always telling me stories of how we’ll escape and get a house near a river with wildflowers, and how she would bake me cookies and I can catch fireflies in the summer.” He sighs. “Of course that couldn’t happen, my dad kept her locked in the house and she had no money of her own but yet she tried so hard to find a way out.” He swallows hard. “ One night she came into my room and told me to pack a bag, that we were finally escaping.” His voice is almost a whisper at this point “We were so close, almost out through the small window in the basement when he caught us.” His voice breaks and you can’t help but put a hand over his. You asked for the whole story but now you wish you hadn’t, just so that he didn’t have to relive the memories. 

“He killed her.” He looks at you with teary eyes. “Right in front of me.” 

“O Jungkook.” But he just shakes his head wiping away the tears. 

“So it was just me and my dad and well you’ve seen the scars.” You immediately understand where those white scars you were wondering about came from and you have to stop yourself from hugging him. 

“I’m not telling you this to try and manipulate you into letting me stay, I just want to give you background information.” He says softly and you can't imagine why he would even think that you were considering him trusting you with this as manipulation. 

“So anyway,” he continues. “ My dad at some point got involved with some pretty bad people and one night they burst into the house, demanding him to pay what he owed them but of course he couldn't. He gambled it all away.” He takes a breath. “So they shot him. They didn’t know I was in the house so I climbed through a window to get away,” 

He chuckles lightly looking at you and it surprises you. “Let me tell you running away with a broken ankle isn’t easy.” You don’t know what to say startled by the way he laughs at this, so you just wait for him to continue, which he does. 

“ I lived on the street for a while, trying to get scraps from dumpsters behind restaurants you know that kind of thing.” He looks to you as if you know what he means but you don't. You’ve never had to live like that before and knowing that it was what he was used to for who knows how long makes your heart break. 

“That’s where Namjoon-hyung found me, I was 10 at the time, some guys were beating me up because I had wandered into their territory. He and the others intervened and after that he took me in.” He looks at you again. “I didn’t know what they were doing in the beginning, I was so skittish barely anyone could get near me, but eventually Jimin got through to me and  slowly I learned to trust them all. When I was 13, Namjoon-hyung  told me what they did. I was disgusted at first, but they had become my family. A real family, so how could I ever leave them.” 

“Did they force you into it then?” You ask when he pauses.

But Jungkook shakes his head. “No, they never forced me to do anything, but I wanted to train with them and one night I asked Jimin if I could tag along on a mission.” He looks to the side as if imagining it. 

“The mission was routine, just getting a shipment nothing serious, but on the way back we came across a man trying to pull a girl into an alley.” His face goes hard. “Jimin made everyone stop and we saved her. He told me after that we have a code.” He looks at you. “ We protect the people in our territory, that we may live in a world full of violence but we don’t have to let innocent people live in it too.” 

You nod your head trying to understand what he means and you think you do. 

He risks taking your hands into his. “Y/n I may be a bad person and I have done bad things but you have to know that I never acted with you, everything I did or said it was real, is real. Hell, I wasn’t even supposed to be living here anymore.” 

You frown. “What do you mean?” 

“When I came to live with you I just needed a place to hide for a few weeks, but this place became like a sanctuary to me away from all the violence, where I can just be myself, and after a while, I realised it wasn’t just the apartment it was you too.” He takes a deep breath and his eyes fill with tears. 

“I understand if you want me to leave and never want anything to do with me again, I can’t ask you to still love me but I can only make sure that you know that I truly love you.” He waits for you to speak and you know he is waiting for you to kick him out. 

“Jungkook, a rational person would kick you out right now,” A tear makes it way down his cheek, “Luckily I have never been a rationale person.” You pull him into a hug. 

“If we met differently yes maybe I would be running for the hills but Jungkook,” You pull away a bit, wiping the tears from his face, “I love you for the person you showed me you are and I believe that, that is the real you, and that the only thing you ever wanted was a family, and now that you found one you will fight for them no matter what.” 

Jungkook pushes his face into your neck and let’s out a sob. You place your hand on his back rubbing circles on it trying to soothe him as he lets it all out. You sit like that for what feels like hours, hugging and him just nuzzling into your neck even after he stopped crying.

“So I’m basically a mafia doctor then?” You joke trying to lighten the mood.  

He chuckles. “Yeah, everyone is jealous that I can just get patched up by you without doing it myself.” 

You frown. “Do you guys just, what ,patch yourselves up?” 

“We’ve learned how to do the basics so we help each other.” He sighs and plays with your fingers. “I was suppose to go to headquarters that night you helped me for the first time but I guess my brain just wanted safety.” 

You sigh. “ Well I mean I could help the others too if they want me…”

“No.” Jungkook interrupts you, and you look taken aback. “Not because I want to keep you to myself but I don’t want you anywhere near that part of my life, it’s too dangerous, that’s why I didn’t want to tell you in the first place even if some of the others said I should.” 

You frown. “ Who said you should?”

“Jimin and Hobi hyung.” He mumbles looking away.

“Not Tae?” You raise an eyebrow at the information.

Jungkook shakes his head. “No, he said it would be too unsafe, Jimin didn’t want to keep you in the dark and Hobi said you deserved to know the truth.”

You look down at your intertwined hands as a thought dawns on you. “Are you going to get in trouble for telling me?” 

Jungkook shakes his head . “No, the others were more indifferent than against it, so I should be fine.” He smiles lightly at you, placing his finger underneath your chin making you look at him. 

“I’m glad you didn’t run away, I don’t know how I would have broken it to the other two. They like you too much.” He jokes.

“Well I mean I guess I knew too much anyway so you would have had to drag me back.” You play along as he leans in closer.

“Yeah probably would have had to tie you up too.” He smiles and you roll your eyes.

The moment is broken however by Jungkook’s phone ringing. He looks at you solemnly as he answers. For the first time, your heart skips a beat when you see him seriously listening to what is said on the other side, now knowing what is happening. 

“You have to go?” You guess and he nods sadly. 

“I’m sorry, but it’s just a meeting okay no danger.” He tries to ease your worried look. You just nod and walk him to the front door. 

But before he leaves you pull him into a tight hug. “Just promise to come home okay?” You almost feel like crying, is this how women feel sending their husbands off to war? 

He pulls away and leans down so that you’re at eye level. “I may come home hurt,” He smiles lightly, “ but I will always come home, I promise.”  He kisses your forehead before leaving. His words not reassuring you at all. 

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“Why can’t you guys just tell me?” You plead with Jimin and Tae who are sprawled out on the couch, barely glancing at you standing in front of them with crossed arms. 

“Because Jungkook told us not to.” Jimin says lazily, not looking up from his phone. 

You’ve been trying to get them to tell you the best way to hide a body for the past 15 minutes. The joke with Jungkook turning into a real competition after you found out he actually does know the right answer. 

It’s been a few weeks since he confessed to you he’s in the mafia and you’ve gotten used to the idea now. You still worry about him but you’re more relaxed when he lets things slip about his other life. He still looks at you anxiously whenever he does slip up as if you are going to change your mind and run away at any moment, but you never do. You have to say after he told you a lot of things fell into place that you never really gave too much thought to, like the way he would smirk or smile at remarks you would make from time to time. Everything finally at least makes sense now.

Jimin and Taehyung acted like polar opposites to the news that you know the truth. Jimin seemed relieved before he started almost spilling everything about what they do before Jungkook had to drag him away by the back of the neck to make it very clear to him that he doesn’t want you to know any details about it. 

Taehyung on the other hand seemed angry and didn’t talk to you at first, glaring at Jimin whenever he would make a joke about their real lives. After a particular joke about who is best with a sniper, he stood up and dragged you to the hallway.

“Taehyung I know you’re angry that I know but…” You were cut off by his arms wrapping around you. 

“I’m not angry, I just didn’t want anything to change.” He admitted still hugging you. “I didn’t want to lose you as a friend.”

You pulled away slightly to look into his eyes. “Tae, I already made my choice, I’m not going to run away from you guys.” 

After that, he warmed up again, happy to know his fears weren’t going to become a reality. 

You did however have a small falling out with them when you learned how they kept getting into your apartment. 

You had found them playing video games when you got back from class one day and knowing that Jungkook wasn’t home at all that day you had stepped in front of them making them pause their game and demanded to know how they got in.

Jimin had blushed profusely as Tae admitted embarrassed that they have been picking the lock. You had blown up at that, scolding them about privacy and personal space and yes, how illegal it is. 

They had stared up at you like two naughty children the whole time. They tried to kiss-ass the entire day after that but you ignored them, and the chocolate and coffee they brought to you as an apology.

It wasn’t until later when Jungkook asked you what was wrong and you told him everything that he made you understand. To them, like Jungkook, the apartment is a place they don’t have to even think about their lives. In the mansion where they all live, apart from Jungkook, they always have to be reminded in some way or the other of the reality of their lives, but here they could just truly and fully relax. 

You felt bad so to make up for it you had something made for them. 

“A key?” Tae had asked confused holding it up and turning it around. 

“Yes a key,” You had sassed, “I’m sure you’re not very familiar with the concept but now you don’t have to pick my locks every time you want to hang out here.” You had explained and were immediately pulled into a group hug, sandwiched between the two of them.

Of course, you had laid down some ground rules eventually like texting you before coming over so that they didn’t catch you in your underwear… again. But for the most part, they came and went as they pleased, happy to be trusted by you. 

Which brings you back to the present, of them completely ignoring your wishes. 

“I thought we were friends.” You pout making them at least look at you. 

“No, don’t give us that face,” Taehyung physically puts his hand over his eyes. “We can’t tell you, we promised.” 

“But what’s a promise really Taetae?” You know you’re playing dirty but you’re willing to if it means you can best Jungkook in your little game. 

“Y/n what are you doing?” Jungkook’s voice comes from the front door, you didn’t even notice that it had opened. 

“Kookie she is trying to get us to tell her how to hide a body.” Jimin spills the beans immediately and you glare at him earning only a smirk in return. 

Jungkook gasps and walks to you. “Y/n that is cheating.” 

You sigh dramatically. “You never said that I couldn’t get any help.” 

“It is an obvious rule, besides they won’t tell you.” He glances at his friends lifting an eyebrow at them “Right guys?”  

They both just nod, their attention back to their phones. 

“Ughh that’s just unfair,” You whine and stomp your foot but smile none the less when Jungkook pulls you into his chest.

“No, that's the game and you should play fair.” he chuckles kissing the pout off your face. 

“Ewww guys.” Jimin complains, at the show of affection. 

“Hey, you're in my house.” You glare at him, kicking a pillow laying on the floor at him. 

He just shrugs, “fair point.” 

“That being said Y/n,” Taehyung pipes up, “What are we gonna eat?” He smiles a boxy smile at you. 

You turn to him, Jungkook hugging you from behind tucking his chin in the crook of your neck. 

“What am I your mother? Damn” You question rolling your eyes, “You can make your own food.”

“Baby we haven’t gone grocery shopping.” Jungkook whispers in your ear and you cringe as the other two laugh. 

“Well, then you can order your own takeout.” You say instead, earning more laughter. 

“Or better yet you can go get takeout for all of us.” Jungkook adds.

Jimin and Taehyung groan but gets up from the couch nonetheless. Grumbling about stupid friends, and third-wheeling they head out the door. 

“We’ll be back in like 20 minutes so just keep that in mind.” Jimin yells as Taehyung pulls him out the door. 

“20 minutes huh?” Jungkook whispers into your neck, “ we can do a lot in 20 minutes.” He lightly kisses your neck and you moan softly. 

“Are you trying to seduce me?” You giggle and you feel him smile against your skin. 

“That depends are you seducable?” He asks.

“No,” You lie,  stepping out of his hold, his arms still in the shape they were when you were in them. He looks shocked. “You’re just trying to get out of doing the dishes by using your …” You wave your hands randomly trying to come up with the right word, “charms.” 

“My charms?” He questions stepping forward holding you by your hips. “Well then do I charm you a lot?” He leans down to kiss you. 

“Yes, but not tonight,” You lean back away from his lips even though they are hard to resist. “I have no coffee cups left.”

He laughs loudly throwing his head back. “Okay, okay,” he relents and lets you go, moving past you but not before whispering in your ear. “But I’m having you all to myself tonight.” 

You feel a tingle travel down your spine and for a moment you regret your decision to make him do the dishes now, that is until you see the pile stacked in the sink and agree that you can wait until later tonight even if you have to kick Tae and Jimin out to be alone with him. 

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You wake up in Jungkook’s arms. His bare chest pressed against your back, his leg hooked over your hip. You smile softly as you feel his breath breeze over your neck, your gaze travelling from his arm that you’re using as a pillow to his hand. You place yours in his, playing with his fingers and running your fingertips over the callouses on his palm. 

You giggle as you're pulled closer into him by his other arm his lips now right by your ear. 

“What are you doing pretty girl?” He asks in his husky morning voice and you melt at the sound of it. You’re sure if you could you’d record it and put it as your ringtone. You’re also quite sure he wouldn’t mind. 

“I’m just thinking.” You reply, intertwining your fingers with his. 

“O yeah?” He asks, moving his lips down to your neck, not kissing just resting his lips against the skin. “What about?” 

You smile wide and turn around in his hold to face him. His eyes are hidden a bit by his hair falling into his face. He wraps both of his arms around you at the change in position. 

“I was thinking about how happy I am.” You tell him pushing his hair out of his face and revealing his relaxed eyes, the deep brown of them sparkling in the morning light. 

He smiles widely at your answer, “ And what makes you so happy?” He asks scrunching his nose.

You place your finger to your chin to show you’re thinking.  “Probably the thought of coffee.” You chuckle and he groans burrowing his face into the crook of your neck, knowing that this means he’ll have to let go of you. 

“No,” He tightens his grip on you. “I refuse, I think you should just stay right here.” His words whisper over your skin and feel goosebumps popping up in their wake. 

You pout. “That’s a bit selfish don’t you think?” You ask, pulling back so he has to look at you. 

He shrugs. “Then I’m selfish.” He says before nuzzling back into your neck. 

“Being selfish isn’t a good thing Kookie.” You giggle at him, running your fingers lovingly through his hair.

“I’m in the mafia I’m not supposed to be nice.” He mumbles into your neck and you laugh.

“But you’re suppose to be nice to me, because you love me.” You sing-song, making him laugh. His laugh reverberates through his chest and you can feel it vibrating against yours. 

“You’ve got me there.” He admits, and sighs. But he doesn’t release you like you thought he would. He grips you tighter and sits up with you still in his hold. 

“What are you doing?” You ask in surprise, before you let out a squeal as he stands up making you wrap your legs around him. 

“I’m getting you coffee in a selfish way.” He smiles down at you and moves you up higher by holding you by the back of your thighs. 

“You are such an idiot.” You laugh as he walks to the kitchen and without putting you down he turns on the brand new coffeemaker he got you. 

“Yeah but you love me anyway.” He replies, walking over to the cupboard and waits for you to pick out a cup. He smiles at your choice. It’s one of those cups that has a printed photo on it. The photo is of you two when you went to the arcade, in it Jungkook is pouting while you hug a huge plushie he won for you instead of him.  Jimin had taken the photo laughing his ass off at Jungkook’s expression. You had it printed on the mug as an accessory to the new coffeemaker much to Jungkook’s amusement. 

He finally puts you down on the counter as the coffeemaker pours the coffee into your mug. He stands in between your legs playing with his shirt that you’re wearing. 

“What’s the plans for today?” He asks you.

You tilt your head a bit. “ Well I have class,” You see his expression drop, “but, I think I’ll skip today.” You finish chuckling as his face lights up. 

“Really?” He asks grinning widely.

“Yeah,” You nod, “I think I like how this morning is going too much to tear myself away from it.” You shrug as you admit it.

He smirks and leans in. “I think I’m a bad influence on you.” 

“O you don’t have to think, you’re definitely a bad influence.” You laugh before meeting his lips half-way and pulling him closer with your legs to kiss him properly. His lips are soft against yours and you relish in the feeling of this domestic moment. Something you two don’t get to do enough. 

You pull away. “But I do have plans.” You tell him.

“And what are these plans hm?” He smiles softly, tilting his head to the side in curiosity. 

You smirk. “I’m going to kidnap you for the day.” 

He holds up his hands as if your going to put handcuffs on him, pressing his wrists together. “Then I’m your prisoner for the day.” You both laugh happily. 

You weren’t lying though you do have a surprise for him today so your excited to get going after your cuddle session on the couch while you drink your coffee. 

“I didn’t think you meant we would have to go outside.” Jungkook whines as you drag him into the shower. 

“You’re going to like it I promise,” you say while you wash his hair. 

“If I don’t then you have to make dinner tonight,” he bargains and you only shake your head laughing.

You're both finally ready, after getting side tracked many times with kisses and hugs as you got dressed. 

You hold hands as you walk down to the bus stop, making puns out of the different signs you see as you walk past. You finally get on the bus and you make up stories for the other people on it. 

“I promise he is going to dispose of a body look at the size of that bag.” You whisper, gesturing to the man in front who has a bag so big it takes up a whole seat next to him. 

Jungkook laughs and shakes his head. “ The girl behind him probably helped him kill the person.” He gestures to the person sitting behind the man.

You snort, “You mean the old woman who has a basket filled with flowers?” 

“Hey, you should have seen the look she gave me when we got on.” He justifies himself, staring at you while you laugh. 

“Why are you staring at me?” You ask, your laugh now only a chuckle.

“How can I not,” He wraps his arm around you and pulls you into him. “You’re just so god damn beautiful.” 

You blush and turn your face away from him , but he already saw your blush and when you glance at him he smiles at you satisfied at making you blush. 

You finally arrive at your stop and you pull Jungkook along down the street to your destination. 

He gasps when he sees where you brought him. 

You turn back to him smiling. “See I knew you’d love it.” You gloat.

The park is situated right by a river and the wildflowers are blooming in patches swaying softly in the breeze. The big trees cast shade over the green lush grass. You had remembered how he described what his mom told him so you had Google searched for hours to find the right place to bring him to.

You walk to a big tree close to the river and then demand the bag he has been carrying. You pull out a blanket and spread it onto the grass while Jungkook discovers the snacks you packed.  

You spend the day laying on the blanket, eating the snacks and ice cream from a stall nearby. You try to find shapes in the clouds, and every now and again have to tilt the other’s head to make them see it the way you are. 

“That is definitely not a rabbit Kook, that is obviously a duck.” You giggle from your spot on his lap as he keeps on insisting the cloud is a bunny. 

“Just tilt your head more to the left and close your eyes and then it is definitely a bunny.” Jungkook says and you laugh hard. 

You get an idea. “Here let me show you something.” You get up holding out your hand for him to take, he smiles and takes it happily. 

You pull him over to the patch of wildflowers closest to you, and bend down starting to pick some. “What are you doing?” He asks but follows your example all the same. 

“Just wait.” You say as you bring the bouquets back to your blanket. You sit down and pick out a few from different colours and start weaving them together. Jungkook just sits and watches you and when you finally hold up the finished flower crown he grins. 

“Here,” you lean over placing it onto his head. “Now you’re my prince.” You laugh and he giggles when you take a photo of him.

You spend a few minutes showing him how to make one of his own and soon you’re sporting his creation too. You grin into the camera as he takes photo after photo of you. It turns into a mini photoshoot as he smiles and directs you how to pose. 

Finally you sit leaning your head on his chest as you watch the sunset over the river. 

“Y/n?” He says softly and you hum letting him know that you’re listening. “Thank you.” 

His voice makes you remove your head from his shoulder looking at him. “It’s a pleasure Kook.” 

He shakes his head bringing his hand up to cup your cheek. “No, not just for today for everything,” he lightly kisses your forehead leaving his lips against your skin as he whispers, “I love you so much.” 

You grin at him. “I love you too. ”You whisper back. You sit like that for a moment until you hear him gasp.

You open your eyes and see the green flickers rising up from the ground. 

“Fireflies.” Jungkook whispers and you smile softly at him. 

You watch his eyes light up as they follow the little bugs. He turns to you with slighty glossy eyes. “You remembered?” He asks softly.

“I thought since she couldn’t take you some place like this I thought I would.” You say placing your hand over his. 

He stays quiet and for a second looking out at the river as the fireflies light op the night and you start to wonder if you overstepped. But then he looks at you with a huge smile. 

“She would have loved you.” He says a small tear escaping his eye and running down his cheek. You wipe it away with your thumb. You smile sadly at him, and he wraps his arm around you pulling you close to him as you both watch the little flickers dance across the water. The scent of the wildflowers entangling itself in the moment. 

You sit like that speaking softly, as if you were to speak normally it would break the moment, until it starts getting cold. So you pack up and with Jungkook’s jacket over your shoulders you make your way back onto the bus. 

The drive back is peaceful as you watch the scenery pass by the windows. He holds you close to him the entire time, talking about plans to go back to the park in a few weeks.

When you finally cross the threshold of your apartment, he pulls you into a soft hug and drag you to the couch for a movie. The movie plays softly while you two talk, talks about plans for the holidays that he wants to spend with your family, and if you’d like to meet his hyungs and spend new year with them. You talk about the future together like you never had before, long past the end of this year or even the years after that.

You lay with your head on his chest as you listen to his voice, and when you close your eyes you can see your whole life with Jungkook. Walking to him down an isle in a white dress, sitting and drinking coffee at little shops up and down the coast, travelling to different countries with him, and one day looking over a river on a porch somewhere with him by your side, grey haired and wrinkled faced. The thoughts of his job or the implications it may have on your future pushed away by the softness of the moment.

You smile as the last things you hear before you fall asleep is his whispered words. “I can see my  forever in your eyes Y/n.”

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.

You know you shouldn’t be walking home in the dark, but you didn’t want to trouble Jungkook. He’s on an important mission with Jimin and Yoongi apparently. The details you of course know nothing about, he never tells you anything of what they are doing. On some level, you guess it you’re glad you don’t have to hear it but on another, it makes you anxious to not know what is happening, and if he is in danger. 

You scoff, of course, he’s in danger. Every time he leaves for missions or meetings he’s in danger and it makes you lay awake unable to sleep until you feel him crawl into bed next to you. Only then when he pulls you closer can you finally fall asleep. 

Your phone vibrates and you pull it out of your pocket to check. You smile softly at your lockscreen the picture of him with his flower crown from that day at the park. You look at the text, it’s your mother reminding you of the games night tomorrow that you and Jungkook said you’ll attend. He confessed to you that he loves spending time with your family and although he doesn’t say it and you’ll never ask if it’s true, you know it’s because he never really had a family dynamic like yours.

 So even if Lilly goes overboard and bombards him with questions and your mother fusses over  him and makes him eat all the experimental food she made, or your father having long boring talks with him, he always smiles and when you look closely you see a sadness in his eyes when you have to leave. 

He’s told you multiple times that the members are his family and that they can all be themselves at home, and you believe him fully. You just think that he finds some normality in spending time with your family that he can’t always find with them. 

You reply your mom and put your phone away, you know you shouldn’t walk with it out, and it’s almost dead anyway. 

With your focus back on the streets you can’t help but feel the forever paranoia sinking in. You’ve gotten used to walking at night with Jungkook by your side, swinging your intertwined hands back and forth and talking to you about his hyungs and what they have been up to. He only tells you the domestic things of course, but you sometimes wonder about what their roles actually are in the mafia. You know they are all part of the inner circle and that Namjoon is the leader but other than that he keeps the information about that side of their lives secret.

You sigh. Your life really is strange, but to be honest as long as Jungkook is in it you don’t mind too much. Which is probably a stupid thing, him being a criminal should be the biggest red flag you have ever seen in a person but you know what lies beneath it all so you don’t mind too much being a stupid bull and running into it head on. 

You hear footsteps behind you and you sneakily look over your shoulder to see someone following you. No, they are just walking Y/n, not following, it’s okay not everyone is out to get you. 

You turn back to the front continuing on your journey home. Your apartment only a block away and you know a sticky note will be waiting for you with a sweet message probably adding to not get kidnapped or something. 

You smile, only to let it drop when you see a man lingering on the wall next to an alley. You still hear footsteps behind you too. You bite your lip and take a deep breath in deciding to cross the street instead just to be safe. 

Just as you step off the curb the man in front of you starts walking towards you. You look back and see the man behind you walking faster now. You throw caution into the wind and quickly walk to the other side of the street, your heart racing when you realise both men are following you. 

You decide fuck it and start running scared out of your wits now, you pull out your phone to call Jungkook, but just as you press the call button a van almost hits you as you cross the street. You stare into the headlights frozen and say sorry walking past quickly only for it to stop behind you. 

Before you can react the door opens and hands grab you, pulling you inside. You scream but a hand over your mouth stops the sound. The door sliding closed.

“Hey baby, I’m on my way home.” You hear Jungkook answer your call. You thrash and kick at the man holding you, the van is moving now and you’re forced to sit down. 

“Y/n?” Jungkook questions worry in his tone. 

You bite down hard at the hand over your mouth. The man gasps and lets go of your mouth, startled by your bite. 

“Jungkook help!” You scream before someone picks up the phone. 

“Y/n ?!” You hear Jungkook scream over the phone before the person holding it hangs up. 

You stare up as the phone’s light illuminates the person’s face and you feel a cold wave travel through your body. 

“Well hello Y/n” he smirks, “Fancy meeting you here.” 

You just stare at his face, Damion looking down at you. Before you feel a hard pain in your head and everything fades to black.

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You're woken up by a fist hitting your face. You groan in pain, trying to move away, but you feel your hands tied behind the chair you’re sitting on. The rope cuts into your wrists as you try to move.

You open your eyes, your blurry vision taking in your surroundings. You’re tied to a chair in the middle of an open space what you assume is a warehouse. The brick walls and concrete floor give it away. You see it’s staring to become light outside now, the sun almost rising. That means you’ve been missing for about 10 hours now.

“Welcome back Y/n.” You look up at Damion leaning on the wall in front of you. He slowly make his way over to you and kneels in front of you. 

“What do you want?”  You glare at him but you can see that he is aware of the panic sinking into your bones. You have no idea how you’re going to get out of this.

“I just want to have a chat,” he grips your bruised face and you flinch as he turns it to the side, inspecting the bruises and digging his fingers into them. “Just like the one I had with your little boyfriend when he called back. He was so worried.” Damion pouts and wipes at something on your forehead, his thumb coming back red from blood that must still be there from when they knocked you out. 

Judging by the pounding in your head you’re sure you have a concussion, if not you’re definitely on your way to one if they keep hitting you. 

“Jungkook will find me.” You say, certain of your words as you rip your face out of his grasp. 

“O no don’t fret, I’m counting on it.” Damion stands up walking a few feet back. “And what will he do when he sees you in this condition I wonder.” 

“What?” You question before someone hits you again. You taste blood in your mouth and you spit it out to the side. Damion comes back kneeling before you again but this time with a knife, he presses it against your cheek.

“You see Y/n, we, as in my organisation, have been looking for a way to get to Bangtan for a while now.” He trails the knife down to your collarbone. “And imagine my surprise when I found you, the little weakness to the most feared maknae.” he presses down on the knife cutting into your flesh and you scream as he drags it down. 

“You won’t be able to fight him off.” You say through the pain and he widen his eyes at you. 

“O we’re not planning to fight him off Y/n.” You frown at his words, but scream again as he cuts into your arm deeply, dragging the knife from your upper arm to your elbow. You can almost count the number of stitches you’ll need as the knife tears through your flesh.

“You see,” he smiles at you as if he didn’t just cut you, “we want to do something much worse.” 

He steps away wiping the blood off the knife with a cloth that one of the other men bring him. 

“And you little dove,” He bends down to be on your eye level, “are going to help us break him.” 

“I will never help you.” You spit out. 

He chuckles as one of the men brings something over. “I think you’ll change your mind about that.”

.

.

.

Jungkook’s POV

His breathing is ragged as he slips past another guard. He feels the adrenaline pumping through his veins, his phone vibrating continuously as the others try to reach him. 

He can still hear your scream for help ringing in his ears, and the taunting words of Damion after that. 

How had he been so stupid? To let you out of his sight, no, how could he not have known one of their enemies were so close? 

Yoongi had raced home faster than ever after Jungkook told them what happened. Jimin’s face was hard as he spoke on the phone to Namjoon. Everyone met in the library. Jungkook knows he had screamed a lot especially when they weren’t working as fast as he wanted them to. All he could think about was the fact that you were alone with those men doing who knows what to you. You could be dead for all he knows. The thought still making tears bubble in his sinuses. No, you’re not he will find you and take you, wrap you up and make you some coffee and hope with everything in him that you won’t leave him after this. 

He runs past another hallway, flattening himself against a pillar as two men walk past going the other way. 

He came alone. He knows the others are following but he couldn’t wait so when Yoongi had finally found your location from your phone Jungkook had rushed out without thinking twice. He ignored the others or the rational part of him that kept whispering that this was too easy. It was too easy to find you, but he doesn’t give a shit as long as he can just find you and have you in his arms again. 

Even before you two were actually friends he had vowed to himself to keep you safe. His little roommate with her forever playing true crime videos and pens sticking out of her hair as she studies so hard. He always had a lower member follow you at night to make sure you got home safe. After you became closer he took over that role happily. You were so precious, so sweet how could he not have tried to keep you away from the bad things in the world, the girl who had patched him up when he came home half-dead, the girl that took him to see the fireflies, the girl that he loves. Even when he told you the truth he promised himself he will try to keep you as far away from everything bad surrounding him daily to, ironically,  avoid a situation like this.

He peeks around a corner to see two men guarding a door. He assumes that’s where you are. 

“She stopped screaming huh?” One of the men comments and Jungkook can feel anger like he’s never felt before rise up inside him. 

He sneaks closer using pillars and shadows as cover until he is close enough. He jumps out catching them by surprise because they both drop to the floor a few moments later, knocked out or dead he’s not sure and he doesn’t care right now.

He slowly opens the door, scanning all around before realising it is empty except for you tied to a chair, your head hanging forward. 

He rushes forward, you barely acknowledge his presence, only groaning lightly. He cuts the ropes holding your hands. The bruises are a deep purple around your wrists. He also takes note of the cuts on your arm and collarbone and it makes him sick. How could he have let this happen to you? 

“Hey baby,” Jungkook kneels before you, lifting your head up to look at you, he bares his teeth at the bruises covering your face, you flinch away from his touch before opening your eyes. Recognition swim in them as you fall forward into his shoulder. 

“O Jungkook.” You whisper into his neck.

“I know baby, but we have to get out of here okay, the others are on their way.” He says in a hushed voice, knowing that the sooner he gets you away the less violence you’ll have to see. And there will be violence, nobody touches you and gets away with it.

 He tries to get you to move but you don’t budge. 

“You have to leave.” You say softly, lifting your head up from his neck.

“What?” He frowns in confusion. “Y/n I’m not leaving you here.” 

“Please,” You beg, “You have to go.” You shove at him to try and make him move.

“Y/n…” Jungkook stares at the state you're in, trying to shove him away from you before you still. He sees your pleading eyes move from his, to look over his shoulder. He follows your gazeand is met with Damion and about a dozen men standing with him. 

“Welcome Jungkook.” Damion’s opens his arms wide, smiling. Jungkook moves infront of you to shield you. 

“You have me now, so let her go.” He growls out to the narcissistic man in front of him. He knows he can take them all, he’s done it before. There is a reason people are scared of him. He just wants to make sure you’re safe first.

“She can go,” Damion waves his hand and smiles. “But you want to do something first don’t you Y/n?” 

Jungkook frowns as you stand up behind him, you don’t look at him as you walk past him into Damion’s outstretched arms . 

Jungkook is frozen as he watch you walk away from him. He doesn’t even realise the two men that are grabbing onto him before they force him to his knees. His eyes don't leave your figure in the arms of the enemy. Why would you go to him so easily?

Damion hands you something and it takes him a second to realise it’s a gun. “Now just like I told you to do okay?” Damion says into your ear, his arm turning you around and Jungkook struggles at the sight of his hands on you. Damion smiles sinisterly at him from behind you.

You slowly walk to Jungkook, tears stream down your face and Jungkook frowns. What are you doing? He struggles to get to his feet, now that you have a gun he can use it to help him fight these men off. 

“Y/n?” He asks trying to have you explain to him what the fuck is happening, because he feels like he is going insane. 

“I’m sorry Jungkook.” You whimper, and Jungkook stops struggling as you slowly, as if in slow motion, raise the gun pointing it at his head. 

He stares at the barrel of the gun pointed at him and then at your face. You’re crying but there is a certain determination in them that he doesn’t understand. He can feel his heart breaking as he realise what is happening. 

You are betraying him. 

“Y/n why?” He asks his voice cracking, staring up at you. He is shocked, frozen in place. He knows he can fight back but it’s like all the fight has left him.  “ Please I love you.” He begs.

You bite your lip, wiping your tears away with your cut arm streaking your face with blood. You cock the gun, it trembles as it points at his head, but your face is void of emotion now.

“I love you too Jungkook.” You stare directly into his eyes, “ but sometimes, somethings matter more.” 

A/N Okay don’t kill me! I am planning a sequel so you can all stop screaming. I hope you did enjoy their little awkward strange love story. 

Please let me know your thoughts!

taglist: @scuzmunkie​

#bts #bts fic #bts jungkook mafia #BTS jungkook #bts jung jungkook #BTS jimin #bts taehyung #BTS v #bts mafia au #bts mafia fic #bts x reader #bts x female reader #bts x y/n #bts roommate au #bts college au #bts one shot #bts slow burn #bts angst #bts fluff

[sonicreferencephotos]

Why I Dislike Sonic Speed Simulator

I sometimes see people in the notes of Speed Sim refs saying that maybe they should start playing it/get back into it. I want to ask, for your sakes, that you do not. The only reason I still play it is for this blog. I would love to stop. I keep going so that no one else will have to play to unlock characters for references. I will also be adding a disclaimer to future Speed Sim posts. Maybe this is a bit excessive, but this game is starting to break me.

I understand that some people like the game, and you all control what games you choose to play. In my opinion however, playing Speed Sim is really, really not worth it.

If you want a specific explanation of the problems, you can read it below the cut

Problem 1: Gameplay

The gameplay of SSS is simple, to put it kindly. There are a few different aspects of the game, each of which has only the bare minimum amount to do.

You can run around the world. This lets you collect rings and experience. You can also destroy badniks, which exclusively consists of doing repeated homing attacks until you destroy them. They can technically hit you, but all that does is knock you back.

You can do time trials. Actually somewhat fun. Not much more to say about them.

You can enter races. PvP races which are fine. Fun at first, get boring when you have to grind for race tickets.

You can fight bosses. By "bosses" I of course mean "Eggman" and "Eggman but with more health." It is almost exactly the same fight. You run around breaking shield generators, dodging the same two attacks, and then deal a set amount of damage to him before the shield returns. Repeat. Your prize is spins on (one of) the gacha wheels.

You can complete quests. Actually decent! At least until you run out of quests. Good thing there are daily quests to keep you "entertained" with their repetitive tasks. Also, ignore the fact that the tasks for quests are just engaging with the rest of the mediocre game.

All of the above mechanics grow dull and grind-y very quickly. Soon, every part of the game becomes a chore. The game itself even seems to have realized this, and thus includes an auto-run feature, so you can collect rings and xp without needing to do anything!

I am generally of the opinion that it's a bad sign if a game is un-fun enough it needs to add in the ability to skip the gameplay, but that's just me (that's part of why I stopped playing Star Rail).

Problem 2: Skins

We all know the real reason people play SSS isn't the game itself: it's the cool outfits! 95% of which are only available during limited events and/or by spending actual money. You can also expect to do a lot of boring grinding if you don't spend money. Speaking of spending money...

Problem 3: Microtransactions

Time to talk about the true "heart" of the game: Robux. Now, I will give Speed Sim itself half a pass on this one, as from what I've seen, Roblox as a whole has what I would consider an unsavory emphasis on microtransactions, especially for a game with a playerbase of 50% children aged 12 or under, and another 15% between 13 and 16 (Statista: Roblox user distribution worldwide 2022, by age group). With that being said though, Sonic Speed Simulator doesn't seem to have any qualms about asking for money wherever they can.

I could make a whole other post about all the ways this game offers for you to spend money. You want more spins on the gacha wheels? Spend money! You want to get three gacha eggs for the price of one (certain vending machines only)? Spend money! You want to skip the animation you have to watch every time you buy an egg from said gacha machines? Spend money! You want to do less grinding for xp/race tickets/event objectives/candy/whatever? Money, money, money!!!

The game has a lot of the trademark warning signs for a cash grab gacha game:

Several different kinds of currency, most or all of which can be purchased with premium currency

Many different skins to unlock, using the assorted currencies mentioned above (including ones that are specifically only purchasable with premium currency)

Gacha wheels. Many, many gacha wheels. (Not counting the dozens of vending machines, I can think of at least four)

Grindy gameplay that can largely be skipped by spending money

Again, if a game is un-fun enough to have an option for players to spend real money to skip the gameplay, that's a bad sign.

Problem 4: Crunch

I haven't done much looking into it myself, but I've seen many people say that GameFam (the company that creates Speed Sim) treats its employees very poorly. The game advertises its weekly updates, which requires a lot of crunch in order to get content out quickly. This is obviously bad for the people involved, and also has negative effects on the game.

Many features are clearly rushed, and there's a general lack of polish. From glitching through the map, to races starting several seconds before or after the countdown ends, to untextured models, to many small bugs, it's clear that the developers are not given enough time to clean things up before they have to move on to the next week's content.

*

Thank you to anyone who actually read this far. This was a long post, but I wanted to be thorough in my explanation. This is probably the last dedicated post I will make about this, since this is really not what this account is for, but I still think it's an important one.

You are welcome to ask questions about any of this — preferably in the replies so as not to clutter the sonicreferencephotos feed — but otherwise the disclaimers are all I'll be saying on the topic for the foreseeable future. Take care of yourselves.

#not references #sonic speed simulator #roblox #microtransactions

[reasonsforhope]

Thank you, stranger, for making this blog. You are truly a kind, beautiful soul. Thank you for existing for the world. Many of us appreciate you!!!! Thank you!!!!! /vvvvvvvgen

...now to me. I'm sorry for adding for your huge askbox as is, genuinely...

I naturally, without thinking, don't act like my real personality because it's been shunned dozens of times across my entire life. It's not fundamentally flawed (I know that, 100%--we all have flaws, ad I absolutely wasn't a terrible person for expressing them). Nonetheless, all I know is that the person I act like everyday of my life since I finally snapped and started doing this whole thing two years ago -- almost three -- is not who I really am. You know when you put on a shoe that, while your foot can fit inside and you can walk around just fine, you know it's just not your size because it doesn't feel right at all? That's me and my "personality"...people thought I was weird when I showed my genuine personality. I was just...pretty different than most. some comments I've got on my old personality:

"You're ...... Weird." (said with a thinly hid derogatory tone)

"Stop. You're not one of us."

"Why are you talking like that?"

"Sensitive. No one likes you."

And the one that finally made me snap:

"Stupid." (the person who said this then continued top he conversation as normal. Not acknowledging my stunned reaction.)

In addition, for a couple months I got treated like a dog. A literal dog.

I basically got treated like an outcast.

I know the personality I've left buried for so long has grown on its own, with me. It wasn't totally neglected and in fact is still here. It's just hidden behind this mask...which I can't take off. Because I literally don't know how. It's become such a habit to be someone else that I don't even fully, consciously know who I genuinely am today...it's hard. I hurt. A lot. I'm terrified of being vulnerable in any way, now. Just curled up in a shell.

...what am I to do? Where am I even going to begin? I feel lost. All I know, in the depths of my heart, that there is hope. There is always hope yet. That is something I've always known.

So what now? I'm scared, tired, and unsure. Is there anything I can do, anymore, at all? To figure out, and then be, who I know I am, deep down?

Thank you for reading, if you did. From the bottom of my heart--thank you. Thank you.

Sincerely,

#🎈🌠🐘

<3 <3 <3

Thanks so much <3 And fwiw for anyone wondering, it's not HUGE huge, I've got like 45 asks and dms to get to, but it still feels pretty big for me, a person who has def never had that happen before. Hoping to try to answer a batch of 2-4 of them on the weekends

Also, in terms of the rest of it.... Sorry if I'm overstepping, and definitely not to do that "diagnose people over the internet shit," but have you ever looked into whether you might be autistic or some other flavor of neurodivergent. Because as an autistic person, I see a Lot of my own experiences in what you've written

Regardless of whether you have or not, and whether you're autistic or not, I definitely know what it's like to deal with that kind of shit and bullying, and how trying to mask your own differences can twist you up inside. I had a problem with compulsively lying for a while in high school because of how ingrained "covering for myself" became - so I get how unsettling it feels when this shit becomes something you can't consciously control

Because there's so much overlap, I'd actually recommend looking into books and resources from the autistic community in masking and the difficulty of unmasking, regardless of whether you're autistic or not. A lot of the traumas are similar, too, so if you're at that level of "burying," I really think you'll be able to get something out of it no matter what

(This applies to anyone reading this who has also had to deal with that kind of shit or has found themselves doing something similar.)

Also, you should definitely look into trauma work (and "complex PTSD") and see if there's anything helpful to you there--there's a lot of really effective, evidence-based stuff out there about how to untangle your nervous system, because that kind of social rejection and isolation is absolutely/inherently traumatizing

Some Resources

Masking stuff:

Seven Steps to Unmasking as a Neurodivergent Person

What Is Complex PTSD (C-PTSD)? from Healthline

Autism Masking: To Blend or Not to Blend from Healthline

This is an assessment for social masking. It's written about autism, but I think a good amount of it would be applied to other types of masking like this.

Trauma stuff:

What Is Rejection Trauma? from TherapyMantra

Healing from Rejection Trauma from CPTSDFoundation.org

The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk

What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing from Complex Trauma by Stephanie Foo

And if none of that helps you...there's definitely a lot of other stuff out there. There's things like journaling, which are a huge help with this sort of thing. Figuring out who you are underneath it all takes time and feels super weird and it's not easy, but I have faith you can do it. Don't give up, just keep moving forward

#Anonymous #neurodiversity #trauma #cptsd #ask #me #advice #resources

[thirsty4villains]

Cool Heat | Chapter 2

Summary: You're an assistant for the Avengers. Loki has been hiding up in his room for the past week. You go to check on him and he's reverted back to his Jotun form, but he's not quite himself. The two of you discover that Jotuns go into cycles of heat, and Loki hasn't been in his Jotun form for over a millennia...

Rating: Explicit (smut in future chapters)

Warnings/Tags: THIS STORY WILL CONTAIN SMUT, and 1 chapter will have some dubcon, Loki lives in Stark Tower with the Avengers (because my brain is perpetually stuck in 2012 Tumblr era), sleep sex, PIV, smut, humor, romance, Jotun!Loki, angst, more tags to be added

Find me on AO3, Wattpad, Patreon

Tagged users: @nyxxharmonia @mischief2sarawr @drunkbirdbug @lorelibrarianlizbit @strawberry--fawn @thenotoriouserg @hereforsmutbcicantgetenough

A/N: Thanks guys for liking the story so much! BTW, smut will begin in chapter 3 ;) anyway, enjoy!

CHAPTER 2 - (Word Count: 2,500)

Two days passed since speaking to Loki and he was still holing himself in his room. Neither you nor any Avenger saw him since you went to check on him on Saturday. His solitude began to worry you, which was peculiar given you barely even liked him. Nonetheless, you gathered the courage to approach his room again.

You knocked on the door. Like last time, twice, and then a pause before knocking three times.

“Loki?” you asked. No response.

“Hey, Loki. You in there?” You asked again.

Still nothing. You placed a hand on the doorknob and spoke once more. 

“Loki, I’m coming in now, okay? If you can hear me, you better make yourself decent.”

Slowly, you cracked the door open. Inside, sitting in the middle of his bedroom floor Loki had a collection of books strewn about, surrounding him. Some were open and some weren’t. A rather large tome rested in his lap. In the back, his bedsheets hung over the side of the bed and twisted all over the place. The light in the room was low and the curtains were drawn closed. The air was also quite chilly.

You entered and Loki looked up from his reading. His red eyes grew wild with anger. “Who told you you could come in here?”

“No one did,” you said. “I’m here to make sure you’re okay, which you clearly aren’t, as you’re still blue and this room is a mess.”

In a flash, Loki got up so that he was merely inches from you. He hovered over you with a menacing aura and his finger pointed to the door.

“Leave.”

“Fine, fuck you,” you said, crossing your arms. “If you don’t want my help then I’ll leave you here to suffer with your alien problems. Have fun, asshole.”

You turned on your heels and headed towards the door.

“Wait,” his tone deflated. Against all logic, you did. “I know I’m being an ass. Please forgive me, my agitation and aggression… it’s only becoming worse. I am not myself.”

You finally turned back around to face him. The god’s face scrunched up like he was in pain.

“Do you want my help or not?” you asked, still tensed up, expecting another outburst at any moment. “You’ve turned me away twice, and very rudely at that.”

“Yes, I know. I apologize.”

“Thank you,” you said, relaxing slightly. His words also surprised you since you didn’t think he had a single bone in him capable of apology.

An awkward silence befell the room as you awaited his response, but he just stood there. You also didn’t notice until now that Loki was quite underdressed. He had no shirt on and the only article that clothed him was a pair of forest green boxers.

“So?” You said. 

“So?”

You rubbed your temples. “So, what do you need help with? I can’t help if I don’t know what the problem is.”

“Yes, of course,” he said sheepishly. He bent down to scoop up the book he was reading. “You will understand my hesitation.”

You rolled your eyes. Was he just wasting your time?

Loki flipped through the heavy book. “The other night, after you came to speak with me, I traveled to Asgard. This affliction had to be explained in our library, and I went there expecting to find an answer and a way to cure myself. I was not going to be caught dead appearing to our healers in my Jotun form, so I came back here with as many books I could find on my race.”

“And did you find anything?”

His brow furrowed and he slammed the book shut. “Unfortunately.”

“Unfortunately?”

The god sighed out of frustration. “This… affliction I have is no illness. It is an aspect of Jotun pubescence. From reading I have learned that young Jotuns, boys and girls, when they leave childhood and begin to flower into adults they go into heat. I have not told you all of my symptoms. I have been agitated and angry, but most of all I have been incredibly frustrated… sexually.”

You blinked rapidly. “Oh…” You felt your face grow warm. “So you’re — you’re just really horny. But I’m confused, you’re obviously not going through puberty! …Right?”

He shook his head. “I hypothesize that because I spent most of my life unknowingly hiding my true form that perhaps my development as a Jotun was halted or delayed in some way, and it can hold back no longer.”

“Okay,” you said, nodding. “So then why don’t you just find a girl on Tinder or something? Or take care of it yourself?”

“I’ve tried the latter, it didn’t help and only made me angrier. As for finding a girl, I’m afraid that in this form I may hurt her.”

“In what way? You’re no different except your skin.”

“From what I’ve read, Jotun sex is very primal, animalistic. I may lose control of myself.”

“Oh.”

Loki sat down in a nearby chair and exhaled. His muscles flexed underneath the sapphire blue skin as he tried to get comfortable. It was alarming how suddenly intimate this situation with Loki was. He buried his face in his hands, his arms blue and veiny, his raven black hair cascading over his shoulders.

He was kind of beautiful. And you kind of felt bad for him.

“So having sex is the only way to get better?” you asked. 

You tried to shake off a shiver, the cold air in the room was beginning to get to you. You rubbed your arms to ward the goosebumps away.

“As far as I’ve read, yes, that is the only way.” He sounded tired. “Otherwise I may lose control of myself completely and do something that everyone regrets.”

“If that’s the case, what about Natasha?”

His face snapped up, eyes angry. You expected him to begin yelling again but the moment passed. “I am not interested in her, and I highly doubt she is in me. Though she would be a viable candidate considering she can hold her own, it is out of the question.”

“Are you interested in men at all?”

“Yes, but at the moment I crave a woman.”

The way he said it made something within you tingle. You hated yourself so much for what you would say next: “What about me?”

“You?” He stood up. 

The moment the words left your lips, you couldn’t bring yourself to look him in the eye. He was definitely going to kick you out now, or yell, or maybe even laugh in your face. You weren’t sure what compelled you to volunteer yourself. Even though Loki was an asshole, you felt bad for him. Additionally, it’d been a while since you had a good go with someone and you’d be lying if you said you haven’t felt lonely the past few months. As men go, he’s not ideal, but he’s not the worst either. He also has several traits you find attractive in men: the dark flowing hair, the voice and accent, the cheekbones…

“I’m definitely not as skilled as Natasha. I’m no super Russian spy, but I do have S.H.I.E.L.D. training.” Stop talking, you told yourself.

“You,” he repeated again, approaching you. 

You froze in place – unsure what he would do – then relaxed when he simply reached out and cupped your face with his icy hand. His thumb rested between your ear and your jaw. You looked up to meet his gaze; his devilish, cool gaze. He was studying you. You blushed more.

A fist knocked on the door. Both you and Loki flinched.

“They can’t see me like this,” Loki whispered.

“Okay, okay, umm, get out of sight from the door.”

He did, and you ran to the door, barely creaking it open. Bruce was on the other side.

“Oh, I was expecting to see Loki,” the scientist said. “Is he still sick?”

“Yeah, I just brought him some soup,” you lied. “It’s pretty bad.”

Bruce looked over your shoulder. “Are you going to get sick being in there with him?”

“No, he said it’s not an illness that affects humans.”

His brow furrowed for a moment. “If you say so. Just let him know we’re going on a mission. Not sure when we’ll be back.”

“Okay,” you said.

He had a confused, skeptical look but excused himself. He ran back down the hallway and into the elevator, talking into his communicator to the other Avengers that he was on the way.

Phew. At least that’s dealt with. You shut the door and gave Loki the all clear.

“Um, where were we?” you asked.

“You volunteered yourself to have intercourse with me,” Loki said.

“Oh, yes,” you said, your blush coming back instantly. “That I did. Well, I still stand by it.”

“I thought about it and I appreciate the offer, but no. I cannot take the risk of hurting anyone.”

“So what are you going to do?” you asked.

“I will figure it out,” Loki said, resolute.

“Okay,” you replied, unconvinced. “If you change your mind or want my help with anything, just let me know. I’ll be upstairs going over my reports.”

He nodded. “I will.”

—--------------------------------

You woke up on the couch in the penthouse with your reports and paperwork half in your lap, half scattered around the floor. The room was pitch dark except for the lights of New York City’s skyscrapers in the windows. You checked your phone, it read 11:57pm.

You weren’t supposed to sleep in Stark Tower but it happened a few times and no one ever really commented on it. You spent the entire day reading and filing reports, eating both lunch and dinner in the tower. Sometimes you had so much work or the work was so boring that you just dozed off in the middle of it. With your phone’s flashlight, you collected all your papers and set them in a stack on the nearest table. Then you remembered Loki.

When you spoke, it was sometime in the morning, and now it was nearly midnight. You wondered how he was doing. By his description, it sounded a lot like he was an animal in heat. Obviously, animals could go into heat and be fine if they didn’t find a mate, but Loki’s situation was obviously different and he was getting worse by the day. If he didn’t find a solution soon, how aggressive would he get? You felt certain that he only told you he would figure it out himself out of pride, or maybe embarrassment. It was definitely a strange circumstance, but if you were in his place you probably wouldn’t act much different.

As you thought about him and his predicament more, you felt your body grow warm. You couldn’t get him out of your head – his aggression, his vulnerability; then your mind went to how gentle he was, the soft caress of his skin against your face. The thought of his shirtless, blue form plagued your mind, the lean muscles of his abs and biceps. The red eyes that scared you yet lured you in… His cold breaths against your skin.

Ugh, now you were sexually frustrated. How did this happen, wanting Loki?

You got up from the couch to grab a drink of water. As you ran the water into the glass, a loud crash sounded below you, followed by a man’s scream.

You jumped, nearly dropping your glass on the counter. Some of the water splashed the front of your shirt.

“What the hell was that?” you asked, though you were fairly certain you knew.

You went downstairs to the room you suspected the commotion came from. 

“Loki?” you shouted as you pounded on the door. “Are you okay in there?”

The door flew open yet Loki was on the other end of the room, nowhere near it. It must have been his magic that opened it. The god’s back was to you and he breathed heavily, standing over his bookshelf and nightstand, both of which were toppled over. Books, papers, pens, a cup of water, and various knick knacks were all over the floor in an enormous mess.

“What happened?” you asked, taking in the scene before you.

“I lost control…” The god said. “I saw red and knocked the bookshelf over in my rage.”

“You’re getting worse, Loki. This isn’t good.”

“I was reading the rest of the books I borrowed from Asgard for an answer or even a hint as to how to conquer this. Nothing. Nothing! These books are all useless to me.” He kicked one of them and it slid across the wood floor until it hit the wall.

“Loki, it’s gonna be okay. Just take a deep breath,” you told him.

He straightened his back and did as you said. One deep breath in, one deep breath out. Afterward, he finally turned to face you.

“Better?” you asked.

“Hardly, but I did need that.”

“Like I said earlier, we can do it. If this is gonna make you go insane, then we can have sex if that’s what’s going to get you to calm down.”

“No!” He interjected. He looked like he was going to yell again but took a deep, shaky breath. “I said it before, I could injure you.”

“You’re one of the most disciplined people I know, I’m pretty sure you can get a handle on it. And remember, I have self-defense training. Wouldn’t you rather try than just lose your mind?”

“Urgh!” Loki groaned, holding his head in his hands. Was he… in pain? “I said it already! No. I do not trust myself in this state.”

You pinched the bridge of your nose between your fingers. “Fine, Loki. I’ll leave you alone. Anyway, it’s past midnight right now and I’m not gonna go home at this point. I’m just gonna sleep in one of the guest bedrooms. If you change your mind and you need… sex, you know where to find me.”

He only grunted in response.

“Um, okay. Goodnight, then.”

As you exited Loki’s room, you closed the door behind you. His behavior was getting on your last nerve but you also felt relieved to get away because you were fairly certain your face was beet red again. You took one of the guest bedrooms on the same floor, just up the hall and closer to the elevator. You stripped yourself of everything except your shirt and underwear and settled into bed. Before you drifted off to sleep, your thoughts were invaded again by Loki. If he was going to literally die of sexual frustration, at least nobody could say that you didn’t try to save him. It was so odd seeing him like that, so vulnerable and irrational – it was the antithesis of his whole being; the god who commanded strength, logic, and control within himself.

Despite the incident that just occurred, you were able to find sleep rather quickly.

#loki x reader #cool heat #jotun loki #loki x you #loki x y/n #loki fanfiction #loki fanfic #loki odinson #loki laufeyson #jotun!loki #loki romance #fanfiction #fanfic #fic #nyxxharmonia #mischief2sarawr #drunkbirdbug #lorelibrarianlizbit #strawberry--fawn #thenotoriuserg #hereforsmutbcicantgetenough #mine #loki/reader #romance

[joaneunknown]

What does it take to be a writer? Well, it is more than just writing...

Maybe you have been thinking that you have the talent and the creativity to become a writer and have been planning to begin your first book. Honestly, being a writer, even if you aren't well-known and you don't have too many readers besides your family and friends, is way more than just writing.

And, as I have been writing for almost two years now and with two books on the market, I have got a taste of how it is to be a writer even if I am part of the writers that struggle building a small heap of readers month by month. With all that has been said, here are ten things a writer must do besides writing

1. Maintaining a consistent reading habit

I have said this a thousand times but reading improves everything you write. It inspires, it makes you create other versions of a situation, it takes you to different worlds and ultimately, reading teaches you how to write. Having a consistent reading habit means, from my point of view, always reading something. Maybe not every single day but constantly having a "now reading" book. Read how many books you can in a month, whether that would be one or three or five or even ten books a month! Reading is your tool as a writer, don't let it collect dust.

2. Daydreaming/Brainstorming every single minute of the day

Daydreaming as a writer is also a vital tool. If you don't daydream, then you won't come up with a book idea or even a short-story idea. You constantly have to let your mind wonder and daydream. Yes, most ideas coming from daydreaming are shit but if you know how to select the ones that are worth transforming into a book, then half of your job is done. If you have an idea, then the rest of the writing will flow right through.

3. Motivating themselves to keep going

Personally, there have been a few times where I found myself lost in a rabbit hole with no exit. I didn't know what to write and how to write it because all the writing I was doing at the time was just flat with no flavors added. And, somehow, I got out of it even when I thought that writing was no longer my calling. Of course, I got over that quite quickly by thinking of what I could write, and the pleasure writing gives me.

4. Thinking out of the box

Now, I consider that writing isn't for everybody because when you are writing you must think out of the box and think of all the stories and plots that exist. Sometimes, that is not as easy as every single one of us (especially the writers that are just starting out) has a larger or smaller fear of being judged. Judging nowadays comes from the tiniest pieces of crap, so I came to the conclusion that no matter what I would write about, people are always going to judge it.

5. Visualizing their story

Mentally, I think all writers visualize their stories and turn them into movies. Visualizing your story should be active most of the time even when you are not writing because it can reveal new ideas and possibilities that you haven't seen before.

6. Being designers

Even if you are a self-published author or a traditional published one, all writers desgin their books' covers. If you are like me, a person with no artistic talent like painting, drawing or sketching, then you will have a problem turning your imaginary design created in your mind into a physical drawing or painting. I did that with both of my eBooks and luckily for me I had such a good designer that visualized the cover of my books better than I did. But, although it may seem like the easy part that comes with being a writer, it truly isn't. Your book must have a cover that relates to it and that could attract readers to it too!

7. Being some good damn researchers

Researching is vital for any kind of book, and, thanks to the internet, you have all the sources to come up with a good research project. Researching ends only when you are done with your book because while writing the book whether that would be in the middle or the end, you still need certain information to make your story more credible.

8. Having managerial and marketing skills

Marketing your book and yourself as a writer is also a part of this job, especially when you don't have a team behind your name. I, for one, understand how hard it is to market and manage your books so that people don't forget about them two days after you release them. Luckily, social media platforms are a great way to market, manage and promote yourself as a writer but it does take a lot of time and patience to build a platform.

9. Being a harsh editor and a pretentious reader

Editing is a very hard job to do that gets even harder when you are editing your own writing. Why? Because as a writer you think your writing is impeccable and to edit your books properly, you must be harsh and cruel. If it doesn't seem interesting to you, cut it. If it is too flat, grow it out. If it doesn't make sense, delete it. And I could go on with such examples for the next eight hours. Being a pretentious reader helps you edit your draft more than any other editorial skills. Having high standards for your writing does nothing but improve it.

10. Being vulnerable

All writers must be vulnerable in their writing. Writing is the place where you let it all bleed and not all people are courageous enough to expose themselves in such a way. I, for one, consider that writing is for people with thick skin because it takes a lot of strongness to put your pain out there. Not only that but you have to dig deep into yourself to make your work heartfelt and emotional and, even if not all readers notice it, there is always more behind a beautifully written story. Beautifully written stories start with a hurting soul and end up with a healed one...

With all this being said, what are you waiting for? Grab a pen and something to write on and begin your writing journey today! Remember, write what entertains you and it might also become something that entertains others!

"Start before you are ready" - Steven Pressfield

This is Joane Unknown, thank you for reading this week's Talking Unknown post and get ready for another one next week. More at the link in my bio👇

#writers on tumblr #writer things #writing inspiration #writing advice #writerscorner #book blog #writing book #books #book genres #my writing #authors #teen author #teen writer #novel #blogger #bibliophile #writing progress #writing #writer advice #writerslife #writerblr #writersofinstagram #writersociety #bookaholic #bookworm #bookbookbook #advice #publishing #writing process #writing practice

[cpcwiki]

⚠ WIKI AD INCOMING ⚠

Hi, everyone! @mechanical-clown here on a new blog! That's right, it's the Real Official CPC Wiki Social Media Account here!! B) Unfortunately I do not have good news to deliver

It's been a hot minute since my last ad and I do want you all to know I'm still sorry for doing this. Unfortunately, again, how bad I feel making another ad is outweighed by how much the wiki needs more help. I've been feeling especially desperate lately because of the fact that CPC is ending soon, and there are many tasks that will be made harder if it's put on daily pass. So, in my cry for effort to get help, here's an explanation of what I believe is our biggest issue and a rundown of things that currently need to be done! Again I am sorry. This could take a while

If you were fortunate enough to not have seen this post last time, the Cursed Princess (Club) Wiki needs help if it wants to be complete any time soon. Kind of a lot of it. As we all know, cpcblr's very active and prolific in content and the wiki's typically... not. To seriously get into this, the only three active editors in the past month or two have been me, @the-neighbors-kid (aka cursed-princess-club), and Ama (not sure if she wants to be tagged but we all know her!). Shoutout to you two because you are actually the best thank you I love you /pl <3

Anyways, there are already a lot of things we need to do to fix up the wiki. Thankfully, accessing any episode for any information you'd like is easy! And it will continue to be that easy after CPC ends, because Webtoon doesn't feel the need to limit how many episodes a person can view, right? Right? ...Yeah, so, uh, daily pass exists.

As of the time I'm writing this, there are ~10 episodes left in CPC (forgot the exact number lol). Assuming there are no hiatuses, that's only 10 more weeks, or 2 and a half months - and that's pretty soon! While there is a chance that CPC might not have daily pass after it ends, it's a small one. And, to me, that sounds like a huge problem!! If CPC is put on daily pass, accessing episodes will become much more difficult. Looking for a certain character's appearances, adding images, even just finding a single reference - it'll take a day to unlock the needed episode, and that episode will be gone in 2 weeks. The best solution to this problem would probably be to just use physical copies of CPC to find things, but those aren't available to everyone.

And adding images with daily pass episodes? As a reminder, screenshotting while viewing an episode on daily pass is taken as a sign of piracy. Screenshotting, the way we get images for the wiki. I've tried poring through Webtoon's terms of use to find some answer about whether publicly posting such screenshotted images would be illegal, but there's no mention of daily pass, and the text is so dense it's hard for me to tell. (I want to say I'll take a second look at it sometime, but that's probably just going to go into my list of permanently-unfinished priorities. I doubt the physical copies would be a good alternative to screenshots, either.) Regardless, I don't want to take any chances with the law, or see however Webtoon would punish us on the chance they find our frightening screenshots. Thus, another top priority of mine is to add more images and complete more galleries before CPC ends.

Oh, yeah, and that's barely even scratching the surface! Here's more stuff we need to do, presented in an appealing (classic Mocha iykyk) bulleted list:

A major thing is filling in episode pages. Episodes 40-around 110 are basically blank - no synopsis, character list, summary, or extra information. This is the task that would likely be least burdened by the addition of daily pass, but in my opinion, it's still of the absolute highest priority.

Galleries, which display images of characters, locations, or episodes. While not generally that important, I do think it'd be a good idea to fill out mostly empty ones now - you know, since taking screenshots of CPC may become illegal in the future! Most characters have a good amount of images on their pages, thankfully (the pastel sisters have so many they were the first to get separate gallery pages); some, including Jack and Leland, have very few. Episode pages and locations often have way less, though those aren’t as important

Relationship sections for a number of characters. These involve write about characters’ relationships, though in a way that mainly describes their interactions throughout the episodes without expressing any specific opinions. Some major sections that need to be written/updated include Jamie and Leopold; Jolie and Nell; Leland and really everyone on his page but especially Jack; Jack and Lilyth; Suzanna and Lance/Lorena; the Plaid Princes with each other; and more! Many more!

History sections for a number of characters. In a similar vein to relationship sections, these just detail a character’s appearances in the story, as well as their past or other mentions of them. Examples of (mostly - Isolde's isn't fully updated yet) completed history sections include Whitney’s, Isolde’s, and Monika’s! Examples of incomplete sections include virtually everyone else’s.

You might be wondering why I, a wiki admin (in case I haven't said it enough) am not doing any of these things! That’s because I'm neglectful and pretty bad at my job. I will not sugarcoat that part anymore. As much as I love the wiki (it's where I met my best friend after all, and while I'm writing this they just went offline so he can get fucked /j) I don't have motivation to work on it very often. Really, I don't have motivation to work on much nowadays! Ama's been doing the virtually thankless job of keeping the wiki up for the past couple months, and I've been mostly absent. The wiki is only remotely as active as cpcblr because of her. I feel terrible about it, but I'd rather be writing this 9-paragraph cry for help than editing, so, uh... yeah this is a public apology to Ama. I am so sorry. I know this isn't very professional but I'm incapable of being professional about the wiki tbh

TL;DR: As CPC is ending soon, the impending threat of daily pass could take away the ability to look at episodes whenever you want, which would make wiki editing much harder. We seriously need editors to join us in finishing the wiki. Please at least consider helping us!! Any way you can is appreciated - even if you can only make very few edits, I'll be immensely grateful for your support :)

If you have any questions about anything wiki-related, contact me!! My Discord's at musicitself, and you can also always DM me on here! And here's an invite to our wiki Discord server, too!! Of course, you don't have to become a wiki editor to join, but (as was the point of this entire post) I would really really REALLY love if you did. Thank you so much for reading this long, and have a great day!

#cursed princess club #if i did not say it enough. I am sorry #wiki ad :( #mocha talking #cookie told me to leave me swearing at him in. so i did what they wanted. dont blame me #cpc

[dowhatisaynotwhatido]

2. FBT - opening boxes and settling down

Paring: F!Reader x Wanda 

Context: After Wundagore in Multiverse of Madness, Wanda finds what she has been looking for in a small town – more precisely, in you.

Warnings: just comfort 

Word Count: 1.8k 

Part 1 | Part 2 (this)| Part 3 | Part 4*

Although Wanda had been in Farmville for the better part of a year when you came in that Saturday, the majority of her clothes, kitchenware and decorations were still in their original moving boxes. Wanda did not plan to take her stuff out of the moving boxes: after so many frustrations moves, she preferred to be prepared to quickly grab her stuff for when she grew tired of town. However, since you came into her life, she saw herself a little less anxious about moving out and the daily things did not bother her that much anymore. And without any plan whatsoever, she surprised herself asking you to help out – even though she could easily do it with her magic, while comfortable laying on her couch sipping a tea.

In your side of the story, helping out Wanda to organize wasn't your favorite Saturday morning activity. Of course, you enjoyed her company and that week you realized how much you missed an adult friendship. However, the truth is that you simply needed the money. Your earnings as a teacher could easily support your single lifestyle; you never had a problem with that. But since adding a couple of twins necessities, the weekly therapy sessions and the need to move to a 2 bedroom house rent to your monthly bills, you were going through your savings on a dangerous speed.

Your brother and sister-in-law not-so-significant heritage were stored by the government until the twins were 16 years old, and the three of you would be starving if you waited for that. Your mom couldn't help regularly, and your sister-in-law family didn't even bother to show up in your brother’s funeral. So it was up to you to make the extra money.

You sold your old car for an old-old-super-old car. You gave up your mortgage and got a rental. You quickly sold and traded any of your extra belongings and now there was nothing left. The therapist helped you with a social fee and the elementary school gathered last year’s books, uniforms and everything that 6 yo could need to study. Your tutoring gave you a few bucks an hour, and the extra grading and online queering allowed a couple more. But it wasn't enough. Going out the academic route wasn't on your agenda, but the payroll Wanda offered could get your family through a week and you weren't going to pass that.

"Good morning, Ms. Maximoff" You said embarrassed.

"Good Lord, Y/N. Wanda." She said giving you a peck on the cheek like you were friends. "Come on in; leave your stuff on the counter. I just started on the kitchen" Wanda wore a set of sweatpants and white T-shirt with her hair up in a messy ponytail. She was a beautiful women, definitely the type you used to date - not that you were even remotely available to do anything about it in the crazy pace your life was going.

The morning passed by fast. Your company was even more enjoyable than Wanda thought, you held a light mood and you were becoming increasing more comfortable around each other. As you held the stairs for Wanda to clean an open cabinet, or you carried together a large and heavy box - you found yourself enjoying the domestic environment around her. It was pass noon when Wanda ordered a pizza and a couple of beers for you to take a break.

"Not that I am complaining... But aren't you, like, super strong?" You asked while taking a bite.

"Kind of" She dismissed getting both of you another beer "Why?"

"With all due respect, oh-miss-magical-fingers... Why the hell did we tore our back with the heavy lifting if you could do it with your pinky?" You looked at her confused both of your chuckling.

"Magical fingers?" she smirked and handled your beer. "Are you going to believe me if I tell you I forgot about it?"

"No" You smiled “But it is ok, I was just wondering why you needed my help in the first place."

"I didn’t. I like your company, Y/N. And it would feel lonely to settle down alone again." She looked into your eyes and gave a small smile "And I don't feel like being alone again"

"I know what you mean" You didn't. As much as you liked Wanda's company and her proximity made you feel all mushy and somewhat stupid; you didn't see Wanda in a romantic way. She, in the other hand, felt you cozy and warm, easy to talk to, easy smile and she was interested in a very non-platonic way.

"Sure thing" She laughed and followed you into the room.

"You don't. Yet" Her eyes quickly darted to your mouth and you instinctively licked your bottom lip flustering with the attention.

"Shall we go to the bedroom?" She lifted her brows mocking you "To organize!" you added embarrassed.

The bedroom was bigger than you expected from a 3-bedroom house. She had an on-suite and a walk-in closet - almost empty apart from couple row of clothes. You started organizing her bathroom, taking mental notes on her products, scents and a special crimson lipstick that had your dreaming about it a few weeks ago. Her skincare routine was neatly displayed on the counter, her extra towels folded under the sink and all her hair products on a basket as she instructed. There was just one box left behind and you opened it without a second thought the same way you had done with so many on that day.

But oh damn. That box was different.

You groaned low at the sight of it, your mouth watering as your mind wandered to where-how-when Wanda would use all of that.

Wanda was in her closet when she heard you and smiled to herself. She planted the box in there this morning, hoping that you would find it. Your thoughts weren't exactly innocent while sneaking a peek at the toys Wanda kept neatly organized in that box. Many sizes, shapes, different uses, intensities, a whole other world from your small bag back home. You were building a special mental image of Wanda wearing the big black strap you held when she called out your name to help. You almost let it fall as you quickly shut the box and placed it back on the cabinet.

“Thank you, sweetie.” She praised you, your cheeks burning due to the pet name.  “Do you know how to drill a hole in the wall?” She asked when you were almost over.

Once you got into the closet, Wanda was up the ladder, her ass pin up right on you eye level. She was reading your thoughts constantly since she heard your gasp, and the praise to her ass was exactly why she called you using a heavy box as excuse.

You offered politely to grab it for her, once again forgetting about how silly it all was considering she could magically get it down. As you got up in the ladder, Wanda's hands found your thigh in what seemed to be an innocent act. The proximity and the heat of her hand took a small whimper out of you, to the satisfaction of a greedy Wanda.

“Uhum. Do you want me to hang something?” You asked distracted while sorting some Knick and knacks into a smaller box

“Not hang. I just need a couple of wall mounts over there” She pointed towards her headboard hiding a mischievous grin “But I am afraid of the screwdriver” That was a lie. Wanda knew her way around a toolbox, as she often were on her own since her teen years.

“Why would someone need wall mounts near the bed?” You asked innocently while preparing the drill

She smirked “I can rope a couple of reasons” Your cheeks reddened immediately as you caught up with her meaning.

“Oh” you coughed out your embarrassment and focused on the task, your mind travelling a million directions.

All throughout the rest of the day, Wanda collected small touches and teases, observing your reactions and how your thoughts frequently traveled back to the toy-box.

….

In the days that followed that weekend, you two became close. You stopped by the teachers’ lounge more often, went out together to grab coffee and Wanda got used on waiting by your classroom door to escort you back to your car. Wanda quickly became an essential part of you daily life.

- What?

You and Wanda have been talking over coffee for a few minutes already when she suddenly tensed over something you said.

"What ‘what’?"

"What did you say your kids name were?"

"They are named Anthony and Thomas, you know that already" You frowned

"Yes, yes. Sorry. I was under the impression you said Billy and Tommy" She chuckled relaxing.

"Oh, I did. Sorry." You smiled fondly "Anthony's nickname is Billy, after his father. He always has been little Billy because they look so much alike. But after his passing, Billy just doesn't accept being called Anthony anymore" you said sadly.

When you got no response from Wanda, you lifted your gaze finding a conflicted Wanda staring down at her mug.

"Wands?"

"Sorry. I-I have to go" She said storming off.

The thing is that when you told her your kids name were Anthony and Thomas, she thought nothing of it. You have never showed her even a photo of them - keeping their privacy on social media and personal relations due to the abuse they suffered last year. So she has never seen them, and honestly, it never crossed her mind. But today, after she heard you calling them Billy and Tommy, some piece snapped back into place and she finally realized the answer to what had been bothering her for so long since the Darkhold.

Wanda didn’t mean to upset you or your kids. Of course she knew about both of them, as you talked a lot about them.

You two had become closer the last few weeks and Wanda found herself specially drawn to you difficult but ordinary life. She wanted to know everything about you and she finally started to open herself to another person. Wanda knew it was stupid of her letting you get so close, she knew she could not ever be deserving of love again- she had it once and she blew it. Her self-vexing was more than enough to keep her from making any advances towards you, but the reality is that you were the first thing she thought about before sleep and the first thing in the morning. She was falling for you in the last few weeks. Not that you knew anything about it.

And no. That wouldn't do.

Part 3

#wanda maximoff #wanda maxmoff x y/n #wanda reader #wanda x reader #wanda x y/n #mcu #wlw wanda #wanda fluff

[dreaminggirlsblog]

Heyo! So i was wonderinv could you do a fluffy oneshot for raph x a chubby s/o who needs constant reassurance due to them believing raph deserves better

Raph X Fem!Reader - You’re perfect for me

It was almost a year since the arrival of that strange Kraang spaceship, which had caused chaos in New York City.

The turtles, the four siblings who live in the sewers, were recognised by the police for their bravery that day and, among the troop of cops, was Y/n.

At first, she was shocked to see that four turtles could have become big mutants and could talk, she practically couldn't believe it.

But when she met his gaze, her first impressions of them completely changed.

Red Bandana, a name given by her as she could not remember his real name, was attractive to her eyes and she almost liked staring at the turtle's green eyes.

"Y/n?" the girl turned, letting go of those green eyes, and finding herself in front of the journalist April O'Neil and her friend and colleague at work Casey Jones.

"April, it's been a long time!"

The two hugged each other as the boy behind them looked around as if he was embarrassed by the scene.

They'd known each other since they were kids but had lost each other after Y/n joined the NYPD and it had been a long time since they'd seen each other, even though the previous incident at the Kraang ship.

As soon as they pulled away, Y/n nodded towards Casey in greeting.

"Jones."

He sighed, giving a small chuckle and imitating the girl's gesture.

"Y/l/n, you look very pretty today you know?" he added in a mocking tone.

Casey always teased y/h/c but once he went too far by making a little joke about her weight, which was unforgivable for her.

They didn't speak for months but it was he who wanted to break this silence with a simple chat.

"I never wanted to be so brutal to you, I was angry and I swear I didn't know what I was saying or doing, I even insulted a child playing in the park on my way home."

They both laughed after a few minutes of silence, and Y/n replied, "Why?"

"I have no idea! All I know is that the mother keeps giving me bad looks every time I passed by."

In the end, everything was resolved and they became friends again as before, continuing to tease each other.

The problem though for Casey, was that he was in love with Y/n but he knew he would be rejected and now, that he sees the way she looks at that stupid mutant (as he would call it), he knows he has no hope of being with her.

He would like to move on, though, and having found April might help him get over his crush on the y/h/c.

Back to our point, the girl replied, in the same wry tone as the boy, "You know I could say the same thing about you today," and added a wink.

"Nice, it seems to me that you have been eyeing someone to say these things to without using that ironic tone."

He pointed with his gaze to precisely one of the four turtles, more specifically the one in the red band.

"What?" she asked, shaking her head repeatedly, "No, I don't like it."

"No one ever said you like it," retorted April winking at her.

The girl frowned at her, and at that same moment she saw a tall, mighty shadow approaching her.

"Officer," said her deep voice.

Y/n was paralyzed, but not by fear of the creature but more by the terror of coming across as strange because she talks too much or says nonsense.

He nodded his hand as a greeting and smiled as Casey and April stood still to see what was happening.

"I am Raphael," he extended his paw in anticipation of a handshake.

Y/n did not hesitate, he shook it and moved his hands up and down.

"Nice to meet you Y/n" he said quickly in a light voice and received a half smile.

Their hands still remained united, and the turtle turned them around, resting his lips on the girl's hand, like a gentleman.

" Enchanted."

Before long, she broke away and walked back to her brothers and shouted toward the three, "See you Y/n!"

This one remained motionless, always waving at the turtle's hand and remaining half-open-mouthed in amazement.

"He's not Raphael, he's too gallant," April suddenly pointed out, awakening y/h/c's trans state.

Hence began their friendship.

They would meet every night on the roof of her apartment, sometimes for dinner and most afterwards so they could simply talk or admire the starry sky.

After three/four months of getting to know each other, Y/n's feelings grew and Raph's blossomed but he wanted to tell her, at all costs.

"You need to relax, she doesn't seem like a girl who rejects so easily."

"Mikey!" scolded Donnie, giving him a not-so-light smack on the head.

"What Michelangelo was trying to say" the Leonardo leader intervened, throwing the smaller man a dirty look "is that it will be fine, she really likes you trust me"

"And how do you know that? I don't think you are human, she is a girl, she has y/e/c eyes, y/h/c hair or she calls you Y/n Y/l/n!"

"You just trust! Now go!"

He almost wanted to punch him in the face because of the way he answered him but at the moment his brother was the last thing on his mind.

He rushed out of the sewers and jumped from rooftop to rooftop to that of her apartment, not finding her at home.

In fact, she was still at work even though she had finished her shift, only she was struggling with a Casey who was mad about his crush on April.

"How do I tell her if she doesn't want me?"

"You don't tell her."

"But I want to tell her."

"Then do it!"

"But I can't, what if she says no?"

"Look, you've been asking me the same question for about an hour and you keep walking back and forth without ever stopping. Can you explain what I'm for?"

"You are supposed to support me! I asked you for help on purpose!" he replied as he sat down in front of her at his desk.

She sighed tiredly and added, "Okay, fine," she stood up abruptly, adjusting her desk chair and looking at Casey.

"So, now I'm April," began the y/h/c.

"Would you like that" murmured Casey thinking no one heard him but he got a dirty look from the girl.

"I was saying, now I’m April going into the restaurant where you're meeting, what do you do?"

"Shall I say goodbye?"

Y/n sighed slightly, still agreeing with his friend "Yes, go"

This one remained silent, smiling slightly in embarrassment and remaining with his mouth half open as he stared at everything but the girl in front of him.

"Casey?" the y/h/c called him, moving a hand in front of his eyes.

He continued not moving and then the girl turned around following her friend's gaze and then standing there with her mouth open as well.

In front of them stood April in a red, tight, knee-length dress, not too high heels of the same colour and a light flesh-coloured lipstick.

Her wavy hair fell over her shoulders and round silver earrings were visible.

"Sorry if I might be interrupting but I've been waiting for you for a while Casey so I thought that maybe I would join you at work."

The boy woke up checking his watch and running a hand through his hair in despair: it was half past eight and he was supposed to be at her place an hour ago.

"What? That's not possible" he turned suddenly to his friend and gave her a bad look "You couldn't check the time!"

" What?" she gasped "I was supposed to see when YOU were supposed to leave?"

"Yes! I mean" he sighed surrendered and walked over to April taking a deep breath.

"Sorry to keep you waiting and" he paused looking at the girl from head to toe and smiling slightly at her "you look lovely dress like that"

She smiled back, lowering her gaze shyly and then raising it back to him "Thank you" she said with a soft voice.

They froze looking at each other as Y/n smiled satisfiedly, waiting for the two to move for their date, which they didn't.

" Whenever you want you can move" Y/n interrupted the moment, immediately receiving a dirty look from Casey.

"Yeah, let's go," April said taking the boy under her arm and dragging him away from the office.

Casey as he walked he turned and said through his lips, "I hate you."

"I love you too" she replied giving him a wink as she watched them disappear in the elevator

Right after, she turned back to the desk to get her bag but she was immediately surprised by a mutant turtle leaning against the window.

"Raph?" she wondered as she approached him, who kept pointing to the window aperture so he could enter.

So she finally did and found herself inside the office with the turtle, who looked around with a brazen look on his face.

"Nice place, I wish I came here more often," he said suddenly provoking a giggle from Y/n.

"Well, if you want to get caught by the police more often then I won't stop you," she retorted as she closed the window.

He turned to Raphael noticing how blank his gaze was, too occupied with staring into space and not looking the girl in the eyes.

"What brings you here? I thought we were meeting at the lair tonight."

At her words he awoke, shrugging and running a hand down the back of his neck "Nothing, I just saw you weren't coming so I went to look for you at your home but you weren't there, so I thought you were at work and here you are! Even though your turn ended over an hour ago," he explained with a half smile and lowering his voice at the end of the sentence.

"Ah yeah, Casey had asked me to help him with something and stopped me for a while"

"Oh sure" his smile vanished turning into a disgusted expression "Casey"

The y/h/c noticed this, looking at him crookedly and crossing her arms over her chest "I think I missed something, Casey what?"

"No nothing" he replied indifferently in an angry tone.

"Casey what?" she repeated taunting him as he held back sighing loudly.

"I said nothing and now let's go" he replied dragging her by the arm towards the window.

"No no" she stopped herself removing her grip from his arm "Casey what?"

"Casey nothing ok! Because Casey is always in the middle of the talk anyway and he' definitely always in the middle when it is about love"

Raphael froze, only thinking later about the words he had said and realising that maybe this way Y/n had understood something, so she did.

"Do you think Casey is still in love with me?" murmured Y/n in a confused tone.

"Of course, you can see how he is."

"And in fact he's not."

"Of course he is, don't you see how he looks at you every time and how he talks to you all the time!" he ranted turning towards her.

"We're just friends Raph, plus he likes April"

"Oh yeah sure, he likes April. Of course he doesn't like April, he likes you!" he retorted again raising his voice "He likes you and honestly I can blame him since you're just beautiful, smart, nice and kind! These are all traits that any guy would choose you for, but also traits that a mutant turtle would choose you for!"

Raph stopped and looked at her, amazed at his words and with a half-open mouth from which not a word came out.

"I love you Y/n" he murmured then "And I will never stop doing, even if you're love with someone el-"

Raphael was stopped by the sudden touch of the girl's lips with his own, and was very happy about it.

He was finally kissing the girl he was in love with and no longer had to worry about what she thought because he knew she reciprocated his feelings.

They broke away after a while, meeting each other's gaze and smiling at the other.

"I love you too Raph, don't ever forget that."

_

Today is Y/n and Raph's one month anniversary, to which the last had obviously thought of something special.

Not being able to think of anything outside the lair or make a big thing of it, he decorated it to look like a luxury restaurant by arranging a table in the shape of a circle in the middle of the room.

He found two chairs with a pillow on the back and a candle holder for three candles, which he placed in the middle with a small vase containing a red rose.

While he was busy with these things, he did not notice Casey and April's entrance and almost had a stroke as he heard the latter's greeting.

"Ah it's you," he said with a hand over his heart and taking a deep breath.

"Sorry if we scared you Raph and" the girl looked around noticing how well the den was set up and was almost amazed by this "geez, did you finally clean this place up?"

"No no, I simply set it up for dinner with Y/n, you know it's been a month since we've been together and I want everything to be perfect and in fact I'm sending my brothers and Master Splinter with you, he hasn't had a good breath of fresh air in a long time and I'd say this would be the perfect opportunity to get to know New York better as well" the turtle said quickly, clearly anxious about her date.

"Raph are you alright? You look like you're sweating" Casey intervened, receiving a mock laugh in response.

"Of course I'm fine, it's just really hot in here" he replied, airing himself with his paw.

"Are you sure? I mean it sounds like you're actually anxious about the date and-"

"LEO, CASEY AND APRIL ARE HERE, BRING THE OTHERS WITH YOU AND GO AWAY," the turtle suddenly shouted, startling the two in front of him.

"Man don't yell!" muttered Casey as the rest of the mutant family joined them.

"Raphael, are you sure you don't want any of us to stay here?" asked Master Splinter but immediately received a no for an answer.

"Quite sure, now go have a nice ride until I don't know, late at night? Depends on how the night unfolds but have fun anyway."

"Raph you're sweating" Leonardo interjected almost angering his brother who pushed them all towards the exit.

"Go!"

As soon as everyone left, he set the last of the things in the table and then took the carton of pizza he had Casey order for him in the morning, he microwaved it for a few minutes.

"Perfect, it should be here any minute," he muttered to himself as he looked around.

He thought about how perfect everything was but also about the fact that something was missing and the nauseating smell of the sewers made him think of what.

He took a spray that smelled of lavender from a cupboard and began to spray every nook and cranny of the place, none excluded.

"Raph" upon hearing his voice, he threw the spray somewhere and immediately ran towards the entrance quickly settling himself, what precisely was unknown since he was not wearing any clothes.

"Y/n, there you are" he greeted her with a big smile and quickly made her take a seat at the table he had prepared.

He hadn't even paused to notice how good she looked in her dress (colour you want) because he was mesmerised by the bright colour of her eyes under the moonlight.

When she was seated, he awoke from his moment of hypnosis and went to get dinner, carrying it like a real waiter.

"Madam, did you order pizza?" he asked the girl, placing the pizza in front of her.

She giggled while Raph did the same, going to sit opposite her.

They shared the eight slices and began to eat in complete silence, both lacking in argument but Raph was not without anxiety.

He saw how Y/n barely touched the pizza with his fork and believed it was because it was cold, he had probably made a mistake ordering it at lunchtime in the morning.

'Maybe the pizza is a bit cold,' he suddenly said.

"What? No no, I'm just not very hungry"

"Oh, I thought" he panicked "I thought maybe you didn't like it because it was too cold, you know I had Casey order it this morning but I didn't think that maybe many hours later it would be cold and actually I didn't even think that maybe instead of the usual pizza I could get something simpler but actually I didn't even imagine that you weren't hungry even though that's something you say all the time and you say it because you think your body isn't doing well and I have to say I'm talking out of my ass and maybe I brought up something I shouldn't have so please stop me or I might end up really hurting you"

He stopped himself bringing a hand to his mouth as Y/n was wide-eyed and open-mouthed.

"I...Um, yeah I'm not hungry for that reason" she murmured in a light voice as she lowered her gaze.

Raphael stared at her displeased, removed his paw from his mouth, took a deep breath to calm himself and stood up to go in front of her.

He got down on his knees in front of her looking for her gaze and found it shortly after, this gave him a chance to rest a hand on her cheek.

"It's a month that we've been together, a month that I've been telling you how much I love you and how special I think you are and it's also a month that I've been telling you over and over again how perfect you are at everything. You're perfect in your work, your personality is perfect, your face is perfect, your hair is perfect but most of all," he moved his hand to her chin, taking it with two fingers, "your body is perfect."

They smiled at each other and he brought their faces closer to leave a slow but short kiss on her lips.

"You’re perfect for me Y/n"

---------------------------------

Words: 1347

Sorry for the errors and the long waiting, I'll try to be more active.

Hope you like it!

#raphael x reader #raph #raphael #bayverse raph #tmnt bayverse #tmnt 2014 #tmnt 2016 #tmnt raphael #dreaminggirlsblog requests

[scumbag-monthly]

The Young Ones Were: A Final Word from Scumbag Monthly’s Editor 🖕💚

I was going to post this on 7th March – the birthday of the pan global phenomenon himself – but I think the emotion will be stronger tonight. Either way, I’ve chosen this post to say my last farewells to Scumbag Monthly and thank the people who helped make it what it was.

It was my decision as editor to end SM at Issue #25 and it was a difficult one to make. Although SM has come with both pros and cons, it’s something I’ve enjoyed creating and is something I’m very proud of. In a way, it would have been easier to carry on – sticking with the familiar is always easier – but I didn’t want our fanzine to drift off into nothingness. I thought twenty-five was a good number to end it at. Three years; twenty-five issues; three Rik specials; a zine for the fortieth anniversary – I think we’ve done alright, all things considered. More than alright! I’m so happy that we were able to add to the fandom in some small way.

I have a head for dates, so I can tell you with 99% certainty that I took on the reins of editorship at SM on 14th May 2020. It’s weird that that time feels both close and far away – international pandemics will do that to you. I’ve seen engagement and interest in this zine ebb and flow over the years. We’ve never really received enough submissions to keep us afloat long term. I used to ask my mutuals if I could add old art of theirs to zines to keep the Drawing Room full, and the amount of my fic that made its way into SM was not the result of an overinflated ego (I promise!), more the result of fic submissions falling even lower than art submissions. We’re a small fandom; that’s always been a problem for SM. While I’ve continually emphasised the importance of submissions to SM – how else would SM involve those not working behind the scenes? – the truth is that the end products simply wouldn’t have arrived on our website be it not for the so-called scumbag staff who dedicated their free time to making pages and content.

With a small fandom and ergo a small team, SM’s ambitions had to be realistic. We would all have loved to bring new segments out in every issue but, with a lot to do and limited time to get it done each time, this often wasn’t possible. I never wanted SM to become a burden to the people who made pages for it, as we all lead offline lives and SM was simply a passion project – we made this because we wanted to, because it was fun.

I won’t deny there have been points where SM burnt me out a tad. I think it was easy to lose sight of things during the lockdowns, or simply fall completely into one project. There are some zines where well over twenty of the pages were made by me because they had to be, and I’ve often feared that The People’s Poetry suffered because of this. I’m very pleased and grateful to point out that the page share became slightly less exaggerated after we found different people for each character, but (and I’m afraid I am going to have to be egotistical now XD) I’d be lying if I denied every zine since Issue #4 isn’t drenched in my blood, sweat, and improvised version of graphic design (not actually my passion, me being primarily a writer and all XD).

I hope this isn’t sounding too negative because SM really does mean a lot to me. I think it’s just that a mixed relationship is guaranteed with anything you give a lot of yourself to and I want to be honest here, at the end. It’s going to feel weird for me for a little while: no more new documents to set up, no more new pages to make, no more themes to discuss, no more Google Forms to collect. I will miss SM, but thanks to the internet it’ll actually still be here. We’ll be keeping the website up as an archive and the same with our Tumblr blog and Instagram (scumbag_monthly). For future runs of the Rik and Ade Fest, another blog has been set up (@rikandadefest). SM has also had a Redbubble on the down low for some time now and we’re planning on adding our designs of the lads there soon, if any of you fancy owning something with those on.

I realise this whole post comes at the risk of sounding pretentious and melodramatic… but sod it, you know? Here are the people I’d like to thank individually, on behalf of our fanzine.

@theevilesteviled -

First of all, the creator of SM: the reason you’re even reading this right now. During the period in which SM got going – that calm before the utter shitstorm of 2020 – we spoke nearly every day… though, living on different sides of the globe did limit our talk time to early mornings and late evenings. Ed is the reason SM ever launched. She did almost everything for the first few zines, often at the cost of her own sanity, and she inspired a passion for this fanzine within me.

In May 2020, when I found myself in lockdown limbo between college and university, Ed was struggling with the brunt of SM plus the new hell of online classes. When I took charge of Issue #4, I don’t think I realised the extent of what I was taking on – I certainly didn’t expect to still be editor nearly three years later! Even so, without Ed SM wouldn’t have gotten as far as Issue #4. I’ll admit when she initially proposed the idea for a The Young Ones fanzine, I didn’t assume it would ever actually happen. I agreed to take on Rick’s page, but never allowed myself to imagine we’d end up with a project that’d last three years. Surely, it was only other people who could pull off that kind of thing, right? Surely, a group of introverted young adults online weren’t really going to get anywhere with this, were we?

I’m not trying to make SM sound bigger than it is – I’m well aware how niche we are, have always been – but the point I’m trying to make is: thanks to Ed spearheading SM in the early days, I had the profound realisation that I can actually be creative and try new things and they’re not destined to fall completely flat on their faces. I think everyone involved with SM, be it through making pages or submitting their work, has experienced a version of this same realisation with the publication of each zine.

That’s thanks to Ed, so I’d like to formally express my gratitude. Thank you, ya bastard.

@xgardensinspace -

The lovely Deya! Deya has always been a big part of SM, right from the beginning. The portraits of Vyvyan, Rick, Neil, Mike, Balowski, and P that appeared regularly in our zines were drawn by them, as well as the ten portraits of our staff on our website. That’s not even mentioning the five exemplary covers they’ve whizzed up for SM!

Not only is Deya an exceptionally talented artist, they’re also an enthusiastic team player. From Issue #11 onwards, they’ve been our resident Mike. As most of us agree, Mike is the most difficult young one to characterise – Deya rose to the challenge with full commitment. Alongside taking on Mike’s Moments, for a period of time in late 2021 Deya posted as Mike to SM’s Instagram every Thursday, providing all of us with funny insights into Mike’s sense of fashion. There have also been times when my SM workload proved too much and they stepped up to write Comic Strip reviews for our Strip Tease – in fact, one of my favourite reviews is the one of Five Go Mad on Mescalin we wrote together for Issue #18.

Deya has always been passionate about SM, even when it seemed there were only a few of us who were. They’ve been incredibly supportive and understanding, often one of the first to volunteer to make art or write pieces for specials. To put it lightly, SM would be left severely lacking without their endless contributions and help and for that reason I’m incredibly thankful to them.

Last spring, I was lucky enough to finally meet Deya, when they visited the UK on holiday, and they were just as lovely in person as they are online. Thank you ever so much for your work on SM, you really are a cool person.

@drinkysketch -

I felt it only right to single out Julia here. Fandom spaces are ever changing and the individuals who’ve contributed to SM are no different. Despite this, Julia has been a constant cover artist for SM – not only did she create our first ever cover art back when SM was completely unknown, she’s since provided us with five more pieces for our covers. As the clever trousers among you will have worked out, that’s six in total. Almost a quarter of our regular zines!

There’s something instantly likeable about Julia’s art style: the shapes, the bright colours, the insistence on always giving Vyvyan one eye bigger than the other. The cover of Issue #1 especially is representative of SM – it’s the establishing shot – and I couldn’t imagine a better piece of art than the one Julia provided us with. I’d like to thank her for always being so eager to make art for us, even as the world’s gotten crazier and crazier. True scumbag style!

@codrington-road -

It was April 2020 when Haley first emailed SM with a fanfic submission and an offer to make pages for Neil. These were the early days of SM – Ed and I were just about keeping up with the zine’s Rick and Vyv content but were seriously struggling where Mike and Neil were concerned. It’s thanks to Haley that Neil is the only young one I’ve never had to make a page for… well, aside from that time we switched characters for April Fool’s in Issue #14… and she’s been a constant, reliable presence at SM since Issue #4.

There probably aren’t many people who could come up again and again with hilarious horoscopes on purpose, and I don’t know for exactly how many Wednesdays Haley manned Neil’s entries to our Instagram stories, but it was a lot. 9th June 2021 fell on a Wednesday – a little daunting for anyone. Yet, I think it’s that entry from ‘Neil’, a touching piece about missing people who are no longer here while still carrying the warmth they gave us within us, that sticks out to me the most.

Haley has always brought the exact right levels of surrealism, humour, and bloody hippie moping to Neil. She is probably secretly Nigel Planer. She’s helped keep the excitement for SM alive in me when I’ve been at my wit’s end with it and is in fact the main reason this fanzine didn’t fold after Issue #19. Honestly, she’s great. Have you read the fanfic she’s submitted? Pure brilliance. Her reviews of Rik Mayall's Bedside Tales and GLC were sublime.

Thank you, Haley, for encouraging not just me but everyone behind the scenes of SM and for being our resident Neil for so long. I know you’re a girlie, but I hope the seed of your loin is fruitful in the belly of your woman. Ta very much!

@martian-martian-martian -

Part of SM since Issue #18, Wisely is a person who truly deserves so much love. I first spoke to Wisely on Tumblr when they signed up to write about Rick and Kevin in our second Rik zine, in 2021. Needless to say, the results of their endeavours were some of the most memorable pieces in that zine. Rick still hasn’t recovered.

After that, Wisely only became more and more involved in SM, until they’d taken on the enigmatic fifth housemate, that scumbag named Petyr, as a regular in our zine. They did this despite the graphic design element being out of their comfort zone and even came up with a whole new page idea to spearhead. Cliff ‘sHits – as well as having a perfectly Young Ones-esq name – is exactly the kind of thing I always hoped would start happening with SM: that staff would strike out with new page ideas when they had the time. Wisely has a talent for twisting well known verses to fit the scumbag agenda and we thank them for it.

A keen promoter of SM – they could frequently be found suggesting submitting to our fanzine in the comments of TYO fanart on Tumblr – they’ve even written fanfic to keep zines full of content. I’d like to thank them for joining the team and enhancing the zine in the process. SM is all the better for having them.

@the-tardis-in-221b-baker-street -

Zoe already has a name for herself in Rik Mayall circles outside the scumbags; what fan wouldn’t go absolutely crazy at the sheer time and dedication she puts into her many cosplays? Zoe has a knack for morphing into the bastards she portrays… physically, at least. I’ve always found her to be as friendly as Alan B’Stard is devious. XD

It was during SM’s hiatus, when the spot of resident Vyvyan fell vacant, that Zoe immediately jumped at the chance to help SM out. Since Issue #20, she’s provided the voice of the beloved punk as well as producing a page of her own design, Top of the Plops. Zoe has also been quick to help out where reviews of Filthy, Rich and Catflap and of the music in The Young Ones are concerned, for which I am very grateful. Despite being the newest staff member at SM, she’s thrown herself fully into it and offered much needed reassurance and submissions whenever necessary. Zoe has been an optimistic voice at the fanzine: always up for new ideas and competitions, always there with schemes to boost engagement. Her DnD stats for the lads in Issue #24 were incredible.

We’ve had many scumbags writing for Vyvyan at SM over the years – more than we’ve had for any other character – and I’m thrilled we got Zoe in for our final run. She even made the cover art for our last issue. Thank you!

@aspinecone -

Aspen is someone I’ve shared online fandom spaces with since 2017. We’re both fans of Red Dwarf, but it was our shared enjoyment of The Young Ones that finally got us talking to one another. Last autumn, we finally met in person when we went to see Ade in A Christmas Carol - a brilliant day with a great friend that I'll always remember.

Aspen has had a presence behind the scenes of SM since the beginning, often submitting fanart and the odd piece of fanfic, until they took on the role of resident Balowski at SM from Issue #16 onwards. Creating content for the character most out of the loop with the others isn’t as easy as you might think, but Aspen has always produced insane, amusing pages for him. Aspen was also the original cover artist pencilled in for Issue #21, but graciously stood aside when they realised offline commitments were going to need more of their time.

During SM’s run, I’ve sometimes had hairbrained schemes such as making the badges several scumbags will be receiving very, very soon. I’m no design whiz – Ed and I always made SM out of Word Documents – and Aspen helpfully volunteered to remove the backgrounds from designs and clean them up. Like I’ve always said, producing SM has been a team effort. I’d like to thank Aspen for always being in my corner.

@cloubdustings -

Ava, the mad meme machine! If I recall correctly, Ava first popped up in scumbag circles in late 2020. She surprised SM with cover art for Issue #10 and kindly took on the role of resident Vyvyan from that same issue until Issue #19. 2021 was not a fun year – in fact, I’d argue it was worse than 2020 in some respects – so having Ava on the SM team to handle all Vyvyan content was a great help.

Ava has a very distinct sense of humour and you can usually tell which British comedian she’s most recently become obsessed with by checking her Instagram. XD Even with changing tastes, she’s still making content about Mr Mayall and her brand of whackiness is most definitely beloved by the fandom. Thank you for sharing it with SM!

@lumivarjo -

Lumi was around at the very beginning of SM and is actually responsible for the piece of grey tape bearing the zine’s name that became our logo. He was our original resident P, producing pages for us during the autumn of 2020. Lumi has always been more behind the scenes than at the forefront of SM, but has nonetheless also always been supportive. Being an artistic sod, Lumi is to thank for many of the key headers SM used, which were all vital pieces of the SM brand… if we want to get really pretentious. Thank you for being there for the zine!

@serenpop -

Pol was also around when Ed was proposing this insane new idea of a fanzine for The Young Ones and was our first resident Neil. Offline commitments saw them have to drop the role, but they reappeared again to help us out when we needed cover art at a pinch for Issue #9. A lot of SM’s Drawing Rooms have featured art from Pol, so I’d like to thank them for brightening up our pages!

Additionally, I'd like to thank the other scumbags who’ve made cover art for us: @frankenbolt (who made three(!) beautifully chaotic covers, including everybody’s favourite Modern AU); @whatacompletebastard (for the fab Breakfast Club parody that’s always been popular with the scumbags); @heinzpilsnerbloody (another talented artist who drew me a whole bunch of cool stuff in an exchange and kindly helped SM out); @colourshot-draws (our first anniversary zine cover artist and a genuinely lovely person); @postpunkpontypandyphantomthief (a massive Rik Mayall fan and integral part of the fandom); thedinodoodles (for being ahead of the curve and bringing us pirates before the Tumblr obsession); @rikhead (for the sheer dedication to detail on her cover and for her legendary skills in Rik Pic Hunting™); and @smashingblouses (for providing us with the brilliant TYO 40th anniversary zine cover art). I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: SM couldn’t have functioned without its cover artists. Thank you all. Big respec.

There are a few final scumbags I wish to mention and thank - SM's cheerleaders, if you will. These people have brightened up my day on various occasions and their enthusiasm helped make the zine what it was: @anglophobias, @my-blood-is-maple-syrup, @friedhofcreative, @shotsofnovacaine, @5gogh2, @mariigoldmayall, and @fourstarsandahamster.

Finally, of course, I’d like to say a quick thank you to the people who inspired this fanzine in the first place. Without the canon, there would be no fanon. They’re never going to read this thank Cliff but without the brilliance of Rik Mayall, Adrian Edmondson, Nigel Planer, Christopher Ryan, Alexei Sayle, Ben Elton, Lise Mayer, and all the recurring comic guest stars of The Young Ones, SM would have quite literally never existed.

We need comedy in hard times – to call out the shits in power, to keep us grounded, to simply make us laugh. I count myself incredibly lucky to have stumbled across fans of this anarchic ‘80s sitcom on Tumblr. Despite the time gone by between 1982 and 2023 and the changes in society and sensibilities, I think it’s an incredibly good thing that this comedy still connects with us. Most of the people I’ve spoken to on here, like me, weren’t alive during TYO’s initial run. It’s often assumed by certain bastards who shall remain nameless that the youth are trying to kill comedy, that we take offence too easily, that comedy classics are a thing of the past. To them I say: UP YOURS, UGLY! As long as there are people, there will be laughter; and among those of us laughing, there will be the young ones.

So thank you, scumbag reader, for downloading our zines and supporting our bastardly endeavours.

Signing off from Scumbag Monthly for the last time,

- R / @neil-neil-orange-peel <3

"This is it! It's really happening! Who needs qualifications? Who cares about Thatcher and unemployment?! We can do just exactly whatever we want to do! And you know why? Because we're Young Ones. Bachelor boys! Crazy, mad, wild-eyed, big-bottomed anarchists!!" - The People's Poet, 1984

#scumbag monthly #the young ones #tyo #rik mayall #fanzine #notice #goodbye

[dreamypqulson]

— meet me in the afterglow

requested by @cordithatgurl: could you do one where Ally and Y/N used to be academic rivals in college but they always liked each other (in secret), even though they never saw each other again after they graduated, until one day, years later (after Ally got elected), Y/N moved to the house next door and by coincidence she met Ally and Ozzy. They start talking and also by coincidence, they become work colleges and start hanging out and stuff... until one day, Ally invites her for a drink, they got drunk and confess their feelings for each other.

pairing: ally mayfair-richards x reader

word count: 3100

"Finally," you mumbled to yourself, grunted, and picked up the last heavy box from your trunk. You had spent nearly all afternoon moving these boxing into your new house. After three years of living with your girlfriend, it was finally time to start fresh after the breakup.

You put the heavy box down on the ground so you could close your trunk. You cursed yourself for having so many useless nic-nac's. It just added to the work you had to do with unboxing.

"Need a hand?" You heard a soft voice behind you, in the distance, and heard footsteps approaching. You jumped, startled, but when you turned around, you realized it was certainly nothing to be afraid of.

The woman's smiled faded when she saw your face. Is there something on me? Why is she- "Holy shit, y/n?"

"Ally? Oh my god it's you!" Her smiled grew again, and she unexpectedly pulled you into a hug. It was surprising; you and Ally were never that close in the sense that you both wanted the same thing and that was a problem. Neither of you could ever let a friendship get in the way of success.

"How are you? It's been so long," she asked, pulling back. You finally could see her up close. She looked just as beautiful as the day you met her. Maybe even more with age, you would argue.

"I'm alright, i'm hanging in there. How are you? I heard you’re the senator now?"

"Yes, I am! It's been hard to adjust to it with my son and everything but I wouldn't change a thing!" My son. She cannot be married. Something at the thought of this broke you. In college, it was nearly impossible to be with her. You always had it out for each other. But you would still always go back to your dorm room at night and hope that Ally would show up at your door too.

"You have a son?"

"I do; Ozzy. His other mother recently, um, passed away." She didn't seem upset over the subject. More content with the fact that she was mothering him alone. Or, maybe, she was just glad that she could easily get away from a woman that she didn't love anymore. You didn't know, but you certainly wanted to get to know her new life one day.

"Oh i'm so sorry." Without thinking, you grabbed her hand and rubbed your thumb over the soft skin there. She lightly smiled, eyes gleaming in the daylight.

"Thank you, y/n." A brief silence accumulated you both. But then Ally spoke up again, "So, you’re moving in?"

"Yep. Having a fresh start. Is that your house?" You pointed to the one across the street. It was a beautiful house. It fit her.

"It is. I guess we're neighbors."

"I guess so." You smiled and Ally imitated your expression. It was silent again before you both said your goodbyes. Before she could even cross the street, however, you called out her name. She quickly turned around, as if she was already waiting for you to stop her. "Can I take you up on that hand? These boxes are super heavy.

Her smiled grew bigger as she walked towards you. You could've imagined it, but you were pretty sure she even winked at you. Maybe your dream you had of her in college was finally manifestation itself years later.

-

"No way. You still have the year book?" Ally laughed as she grabbed it out of your hands. It was hours later. Helping you move the boxes had turned into opening them and looking through all of your shit.

"Of course! You don't?"

"It definitely got lost somewhere in my house. Ozzy probably ended up using it as a coloring book somewhere along the line." You chuckled lightly and she looked back down and finally opened the book. You noticed, because you couldn't keep your eyes off of her, that she wouldn't remove that grin from her face.

"Let's see our pictures, oh god." Ally flipped the pages, looking through the last names to finally find the ones she was looking for. You were alright with it until you remembered the time that you drew in the book. Your heart rate sped up.

"Ally stop! Don't look at that," you said, trying to grab the book but she turned it away. She was smirking and you were well aware that she already found it.

"Did somebody have a little crush on me?" Her dark eyebrow raised like she was genuinely waiting for an answer. You attempted to act angry, but your blush completely ruined that.

It was red hearts around her picture that you had drew when you had got the book that year. It never occurred to you that you would, one day, be looking through it with her.

You took a deep breath and finally gained enough confidence to speak again, "I guess you'll never know."

"Or maybe I will," Ally mumbled. You weren't sure if you were supposed to hear it so you simply ignored the comment. Either way, your heart nearly pounded out of your chest. You couldn't stop watching her as she flipped through the pages.

"Oh my god," Ally said. The book was titled towards her, you couldn't see what she was laughing at.

"What?" You tried to move closer to her and the book but she turned away.

"Y/n Y//L/n, first place cooking competition. Ally Mayfair, second." She airily laughed. Back then, she would've been at your throat about it. Clearly, times had changed. Maybe even for the the better. "I remember being so mad about this. I think I even ripped this page out of my yearbook."

"Well I bet you’re a better chef now. I haven't cooked in years." She shrugged. "Oh, come on, I'll even challenge you to a cook off."

"Do you realize your setting yourself up for failure, Miss y/n?" She smirked, deviously. She looked at you like she was more hungry for you than anything she could cook.

"Oh, is someone still sour over this?" You pouted, overly fake. She punched your shoulder lightly, playfully.

"Oh you just wait." She moved closer, her face mere inches apart from yours. You thought she would've kissed you, but instead her phone rang.

She sighed, as if you were the only thing she ever wanted to do. As if this phone call had destroyed her whole life. When she looked at her phone, her face fell and she cursed.

"What's wrong?"

"It's Ozzy's friends mom. I completely forgot to pick him up." She quickly stood up from your wooden floors. The furniture had yet to be installed.

"Shit, i'm sorry Ally."

"It's not your fault," she looked into your eyes while she tugged her jacket on, "I should've been keeping track of time."

You followed her to your front door. You knew she had to leave, but even being across the street, you still didn't want to part from her. "How about we plan another day to hang out? I really enjoyed this."

"I did too! And i'm free any day. I'll just be here unpacking. You can stop by whenever," You said. She walked closer to you and you stared at your nose to watch her like an idiot.

She leaned forward and kissed the side of your cheek. Your breath hitched, loudly. You were sure she heard it. "Will do. Bye, y/n."

"Bye..." Was all you could get out. She walked out the door and it suddenly felt too empty and cold. However, your heart, for the first time, felt warm enough to fully warm you up.

-

A day later Monday came. It was your first day of work and you couldn't lie, you still got nervous as you did on the first day of school. After Ally had left the previous day, you had umpacket most of your stuff. It started to feel somewhat like home. Or, maybe you only felt that way because Ally was only a house away.

Just as you walked out of your room, dressed nicely, you heard your doorbell ring. "Coming!" You said loudly and sprinted to the door. You hated making people wait. But you were also curious as to who could be at your house so early in the morning.

You opened the door and the bright morning light nearly blinded you. You squinted. What made you open them wider was the brunette in front of you. "Ally! It's you!"

So, maybe you regret telling her to come over whenever. Not that you didn't want to see her. It was just that you had a panic attack when you did. She made you nervous, in a good way. You just needed to prepare yourself before being in her presence. "It's me!" She smiled brightly, and for eight in the morning, looked quite awake.

"How are you?" You stood there awkwardly, not knowing what exactly to say to her.

"Well I was just on my way to work but I just wanted to drop this by first." You looked down at her hands that she extended to you. She held a couple of developed pictures. "It's pictures from the cooking competitions. I thought you might want them. I have extras anyways."

"Wow, Ally! Thank you. I'll have to look through these after work!" She handed them to you, nodded and smiled.

"Is it your first day? Where do you work?" You think the pictures were a simple excuse to just see you. Either way, you were glad that she stopped by. Somehow, she calmed your first day of work jitters.

“Yes it’s my first day at The Butchery on Main.” Immediately, Ally’s mouth dropped open, the corners raising into a smirk.

“Oh no…is that not a good restaurant?”

“Well, I sure hope it is. That would be bad on my part, considering i’m the owner.” How did I not figure that out already? The manager certainly did not mention Ally’s name during the interview, otherwise you most likely would’ve ran away from the job; being far too anxious to see her again. But then, you ended up meeting her across the street.

“Oh my god, really?”

She nodded, looking even more excited over the fact. “If we’re going to the same place, I wouldn’t mind driving you?”

“Are you sure?” Once more, she nodded. You couldn’t deny more time with her.

You got into the passenger seat of Ally’s car. It was certainly silent as she started her car but when she looked over at you, she noticed how you were slightly trembling. She put her hand on your knee to calm you down; it only increased your nerves. “You okay?”

“Yeah, i’m alright.” You were alright. With Ally, you are. But even being with her made your anxiety spiral; in the best and worst way. Luckily, she let it slide and began driving.

You both finally arrived at the restaurant. The short car ride had been silent, but not uncomfortable. You just enjoyed being in her presence; that was enough for you.

You got out and followed her towards the building. “I’ll train you today, sweetie,” she said and held the door open for you. You almost halted in the doorway at the nickname, but instead smiled and looked down at your feet. Your flustered state surely didn’t go unnoticed by her. It was going to be a long first day.

-

Towards the end of the workday, around eight, the crowds of people began to decrease until it was empty. The employees started to clock out; some of them earlier than others. Ally had finally decided to close for the night. And she kept her promise, sticking beside you the entire day and teaching you what you needed to know.

She walked back into the kitchen after flipping the sign on the door to closed. The lights were dim, the room tranquil, silent beside Ally’s soft voice, “You did really good today.”

She came up beside you, nearly whispering it in your ears. Goosebumps showed themselves on your arm despite the warmth she radiated onto you. You looked up at her, she tucked some fallen hair strands behind your ear slowly, sensually. “Only learned from the best.”

You looked down towards her lips. You could’ve argued that it was a reflex; the soft, pink look just draws you in. Your eyes adverted back to hers and you noticed that she had been doing the exact same thing as you.

But something pulled her out of the haze that she was in. “We should get going.” She didn’t look upset with the incident, simply flustered by it. You enjoyed that you had the same effect on her as she did you.

You both made it back to her car. The ride back to your house was fairly quiet again, besides some chatter from the days work. Before you stepped out of her car, she put her hand atop of yours, brushing her thumb against the soft flesh of the top of it. “Drinks at my house tomorrow night? Please?”

“Of course. I won’t miss it.” She seemed so desperate to see you again, to be around you. How could you possibly refuse?

“Alright, goodnight. I’ll miss you.” She winked your way. The next day was a holiday so you got to calm your nerves before spending an evening with her. You were grateful for that.

“Goodnight, Ally, I’ll miss you too, silly. Thank you for everything today.” She smiled; a simple way to respond to you.

You both went years missing each other. But now it was the impossible to part across the street. Now that you found Ally again, you were afraid to lose her. You wanted to hold her close, make sure that distance and rivalry could never scoop her up again.

-

You stood at the front of Ally's door and rang the doorbell. Your heart beat faster with every unlocking sound of her door, the pulse possibly being heard from the other side.

The door finally opened after what felt like an hour but was truly only mere seconds. She wore her usual tight jeans and a sweater, however, it still persistently made you feel weak every time.

"Hi honey," she said, her smiled grew even wider when you blushed. You could feel your face burning up.

"Hey," you said simply, even if there was more on your mind. You were afraid that if you spoke further, your voice would betray you in this flustered state.

"Come in. Oz is at his grandparents house tonight." As if there was going to be more than just drinking, more than just talking, she had to add the last part in. You walked in past her and she shut the door behind you.

"It's nice in here," you commented, gazing around. Within seconds, she brushed her hand against your back, letting in linger for a couple more seconds. She was extremely close to you, you could tell by her sweet perfume drastically filling you up and her breath against your neck when she spoke.

"Thank you, sweetheart." She's so touchy tonight. "How about we take this to the living room?" You nodded, and noticed how incredibly quiet it was when neither of you were talking.

You both took a seat on the couch. She sat rather close to you, her knee bumping into yours and deciding to stay there. "Let's pop this baby open," Ally says, nodding her head towards the alcohol and two glasses in front of you's. She truly is prepared.

She poured you a drink, handed it, and then poured herself one. You don't know when would be a great time to say that you're a lightweight, but then again, you deserve this. Maybe if you are drunk enough, you'll have the courage to kiss Ally.

Within minutes of talking, you and Ally were nearly finished with the first drink. You could already feel yourself becoming tipsy, and you could tell by how much more giggly and touchy Ally got that she was too.

"So, are you seeing anyone right now?" Ally asked, out of the blue. Her words only slightly slurred. You noticed that alcohol made her have absolutely no censor to her. And that it further brought out her lisp. It was adorable and made you want her more.

"Fuck no," you said, as if the question disgusted you. You couldn't imagine yourself with anybody except for Ally. "I already have my eye on someone." You immediately regretted saying that as soon as it left your mouth.

She moved herself impossibly closer. You noticed she was smirking and raising her eyebrows at this point. "And who do you have those pretty eyes on?" She took another sip of her drink and her knee rubbed against yours once more.

"Hm. I don't know if I can tell you that, miss Ally. I don’t want my secret getting out." You didn't possibly know where this confidence was coming from. Most likely the Alcohol.

"Oh come on, baby" she leaned in closer to you, her lips nearly touching your ear. "Tell me, is she pretty?"

You turned your head and your lips grazed hers as you did so. She was so close that your eyes could hardly adjust to her. "She's so pretty. It's so hard to resist her...at work."

She bit on her lower lip; a habit she used often. She looked as if she was holding back, until she finally broke, "Fuck, y/n, just kiss me already." Her voice dripped desperation and need. Those simple words were all you needed.

What you had wanted for years finally happened. You kissed her deeply, not giving the thought of taking a breath a second thought. She put her hand on the back of your neck and pulled you impossibly closer until you were straddling her lap.

"I want you, Ally," you breathed into her mouth, wrapping your arms around her neck. You pulled yourself closer, pressing your front against hers. "I’ve wanted you for so long."

She kisses you again, and breathlessly responds, "I've wanted you since I first saw you." She pushes the hair away from your face so she can see you better. She looks directly in your eyes. She's serious. You could've had this with her years before.

"Now you’ve got me," you say, and go right back to kissing her, to proving that she truly has you now.

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