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#i didnt have any funny joke or backing behind it i just wanted to draw the
kishdoodles · 2 years
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Damage syncing is very funny in hindsight 10/10
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l1nghuarchive · 1 year
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hello!!! I wish u luck on starting up ur blog! :) being the absolute heizou and kazuha simp I am, may I request them with a sick reader? <3
WEE ONG TYSM FOR REQUESTING AAA YOU DIDNT PUT A GENDER SO I HOPE GN IS OK FOR YOU!! (i wrote this while i was taking the bus home, sorry if there are any spelling errors !)
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Pairing : Kazuha && Heizou x reader
Type : hcs
Warnings : n/a
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KAEDEHARA KAZUHA
• Being the kind hearted person Kazuha is, he'll make sure to take care of you perhaps even stay back behind to take care of you if you are part of the crux!!
• As a wandering samurai, im pretty sure he has to take care of himself a lot before he had met Beidou so he is quite and expert when dealing with simple symptoms of sickness. If it's a high fever, he'll go to Baizhu to get medication and feed it to you! <3
• If you are very conscious about getting him sick even if he says it's okay, he'll write little poems for you and even draw a small doodle of himself as well as leaves! (ps. His drawing skills aren't really good but his words in his poems definitely make up for it!!)
• "Kazuha , these are uh really nice hearts that you drew..!" "My dove, it meant to be leaves.. But if you think it's a heart then it can be as well."
• Kazuha may seem like a rather calm person outside but he is interanally panicking inside if he is doing enough since he is scared that your health would get worse because he isn't taking good care of you.
• If you're symptoms tend to get worse, please reassure him it isn't his fault or he might actually start panicking and trying a bunch of medicine that he learnt on his travels that he thinks might help.
• Overall, Kazuha really someone who would stay by your side even if he isn't a professional doctor he is really genuine of taking care of you <3
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SHIKANOIN HEIZOU
• The best detactive Heizou is almost never called in on a sick day, after all missing one day could mean missing a lot of clues and cases he might find interesting.
• Now when he heard you were unwell, let's just say he doesn't really know how to take care of you </3 and he may or may not have fed you the wrong medicine..
• "Heizou, i think that is the medicine if I'm having if im having problems with.. Releasing gas." "Oh." (you told him that when he just fed you a spoon full of it, you had problems with your stomach a few days later after you got better..)
• Heizou would definitely try to cuddle with you in bed if you are having a headache or having trouble sleeping, of course while you're asleep he might try to think of ways to help you feel better faster. He hates to see you lying in bed all day since he wants you to go on many cases with him all around inazuma!
• He'll try to crack some jokes while you're in bed to keep you entertained while you're recovering. (his jokes are kinda stolen off from google but the fact they are overused makes it funny LMAO)
• Unlike Kazuha who is a wandering Samurai, being a detective requires a lot of time so Heizou always has to leave very early in the morning so he can come back earlier to take care of you though do expect a little note with a few puns and overused jokes next to your nightstand.
• Once you've gotten better, Heizou might have to work extra hours because he did runaway from the tenryou commission to take care of you do if he arrives home late please do welcome him with a hug <3
• Heizou might not be the best at taking care of you but he is willing to sacrifice himself to make sure you're healthy and happy <3
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Tysm for requesting, i hope you liked this and sorry if it is ooc! </3
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anoms-world · 1 year
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11 ppl dont change dont let them lie at you evyone have a comfort zone to back to no matter how harmfull it can be sometimes and of course dependent on the inviroment if its against you or with you wondering who whispering in the shadow now yea everone deserve to live to die peacefully 12 pleaser be like creepy talkinginf personal about themself yet objictvly toward you being slow low defensive teaser are crazy lol they think you talk personal toward them yet objetively toward your self lol they think you are attacking as they do oh and they wish for spices often their wish become true tho you didnt hope for that at all real toxic and you were weak motivated by their blind whispers weird and funny they will deny that do they can not see their shadow? 13 the sad truth is you have to fight and being silence is your fight against life theifs 14 its hard to believe that i rather take damage to just talk my way to not feel alone its seems the only way i know so well with teasers (well at least they serious now staring at the mirror and im sorf of liying at myself throgh that for any kind of comfort for my spirit) i just hate words judgment long personal talk and gosib generally words used for aggrisive personal intuetion
15no i really dont want to forget tho things looks nice now as if was deceved oh and repeat all the pain no thx 16dont joke about food they real seroius about eneregy sources even if you dont need much of it for mind function 17sharing is caring yea espicially when sharing pain no wonder most of us gone unconst all the time 18as much the heart is wide it become empty way too soon i dont think its a good thing its fine if its work for you no judgement
19im inautopilut mode for long time now bc the grip 20for some reason i still remember the wober of street cat who 21we almost best friend wen no one around it make me fierce
22laugh it off if u want im trumalized by nice i knew there was something behind that i feel depressed u cant fool me dont worry im keeping everyone secrites include mine 23 im leaving ihave nothing else i just think being slave for back forth commincain or objective mind stimulation even f fake and natural or emergency needs which requied money depend on your best self often its not even there
-it seem everyone need an enemy geneticly include me as a result -remeber every creature yea even the small one in this world wiill eat you alive when you weak or desprate or sleeap for chance or change -it make me sad to realize no one really care orignaly and they would leave you at the road if they had to -it seem a bit off for me to act as if you were sinsitve by my ballshit when the fact maybe you are the first who can or would approve and handle in ways no one would imagine -never rely on hope it will tear you apart you either would be the one who tear them self apart in defense ooor tearing someone else aparat in attack in another i rathar to attack my self to stay distand frome massive ways keep hating you hate to have to avoid dting brokrn mentallt over and over again while you attack yourself rathar attack others to stay close the exact oposote lmao a real sad story agony? irony?no nono its a thing and its real -the thing is between being hunted like animal by ur closest one orthe factu triedto pleaseall theseyearstrying to pleasethem whileu lost ur real self true identityalongtheway plus not even giving a fuck about ur falling confusedtears
going vegan… i will stop writing for now (until my device reach out then i would draw i have some repeated things) …something off about being nonvegan like evil smart vibes which unhuman to me …. its just meh .. do:coffee hawthorn chimal ginsinsing fennel pumpkin seed black eyed peas lentins oats sardine peanutbutter apricot carrots pineapple lemon lime grapefruit flax seed/oil black seed oil grapefruit grapeleaves garlic onion cherries green tea red wine green bean ginger barly malt soy okra spinach blue/black berry
dont:cashew potato tomato mango coconut meatmilk orange chixkpeas butter beef liver selt water corn oil white vinger frucose cheesecream/chedder pepper alltypes
before i go i have theory about the shadow ppl i think they are just ppl suck out the life from ur child hood which created the personality u have today or whatever left of you in some rare lifes if you want to say its also the reason why u have love and hate relationship with them as u become older unless overloaded to even comberhence/care or or no love and hate thing which would be great which imposiple and too late the boundry are too crosed its why you have comfy looped confusion of your own and shadow reminder in return which had to hold on personal believe for mental peace chance unless already forget or already distracted
i wonder if its just the old spirit memories and they arent even mine for guideness and to recognise for the connection within tho we arent similar or even close at all it must be deferent for connection yet its almost like simon relationship oh i forget it faster than me it can be slower than you who knows?! its by how you build ive never knew someone who was able to change their basic building entirly only the ilusinal one who like to lie in positive twisted confinsing way yea too many types most of them weirded by you XD its awesome!! not really, them confidant XD yea!
maybe maybe its your first memory first stroke and trauma XD love/hate? then comfy?
some twitch ppl have some real good vibes XD hint for what going on sure you can feel it tho its not real for me sometimes yet enough to fill time before something else do so im hopping from channel to another
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did i mentioned i had the worst brain fog this week >.>
its why i find late activeties helpfull to some extended level
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winged-deity · 3 years
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Hello, sorry if you are busy but could I please request parental dreamsmp members reacting to their child swearing? And when they ask where they learnt that word they say from Uncle Bad when he was cooking or something? I just think it would be funny and wholesome lol, thankyou for your time love ya<3
Thank you for requesting and hope this is to your liking!
Parental! DSMP members reacting to child reader swearing
Heard It From Uncle Bad
warnings: !swearing!, !mentions of violence!, !use of nicknames!
Dream
Dream was keeping a close eye on you playing out in the fields while he sharpened his axe in the cool shadow of a blooming willow tree.
He barely catches a glimpse of you stumbling over your own feet, but as he'd learned, you rarely cried over things like that. But what he heard next, wasnt something he expected.
His head snaps up in full attention when he hears the word leave your mouth, "Fuck!" you had schreeched as you scraped your knees on the muddy ground.
He immediately discarded his axe on the ground, and walked over to you, still in pure and utter shock.
"Little flower, where did you learn that word?" he kneeled beside you, trying his best to contain his inner disappointment and anger torwards whoever taught his child swear words.
You had looked up at him, slightly confused at his sudden interest before you answered his still waiting question "Uncle Bad said it when he hurt his hand on the stove, last weekend when he was watching me"
Dream had blinked at you for a few seconds in utter disbelief, he was about to call you out on lying. Before he remembered that you didnt know any better than to always tell the truth.
After a small discussion where he explained why you couldnt use that word, he left you to Sapnap and George, and headed torwards Bad's house where they would soon have a long talk.
Sapnap
You would be with him, while he is trading in the nether. You usually tend to stick close to him as to not anger the piglins, or get lost.
However, this time while he was trading with you behind him, clinging to his pant leg. A piglin approached you, and as you did not like the intimidating look it was giving you, you hissed at the piglin "Fuck off!"
Sapnap choked on nothing, and immediately slapped a hand over your tiny mouth "hey buddy, don't say that word!.." he chuckled nervously as the piglins eyed him disapprovingly.
After you two got back into the overworld, he lifted you onto his shoulders "where did you learn that word" he had asked you, and you answered with a simple shrug "i heard grandpa say it while i was over at his and skeppy's house"
Sapnap had bursted into laughter the moment he heard this, "thats pretty funny, but don't say that word anymore. People are gonna think i taught you that" he gave an over exaggerated sob for dramatic effect, as you giggled.
Awesamdude
He had been working at the prison nonstop for weeks on end, and as much as he hated to not be able to spend time with you, there was not much he could do.
The biggest suprise was when he was sitting at the front desk, when he heard familiar yelling and pounding on the prison gates. At first he was cautious, but once the next words left your mouth "open the motherfucking door, Awesamdad!" his gaze darkened as he opened the gates, pondering who taught his young child such foul language.
Awesamdude wasnt usually one to care about swearing, but when the case was about his own child thats a no no.
He let you into the prison arms crossed, staring you down as you had no idea how much trouble you were in. "why do you come into my work screaming those bad words at the gates?" he stared you down.
"bad words?" you expressed your confusion "it cant be a bad word, cause uncle Bad said it, and he doesnt use bad language" you crossed your arms proudly over your chest, mimicking your father.
He chuckled quietly "i see.. Well uncle Bad is gonna get a long talk after im done with work"
Philza
He had not planned on adopting anymore children after Tommy (and technically Tubbo), but here he was, in the middle of the tundra, a wanted war criminal, with a child.
He was confident that no bad influences would come to you after the fall of l'manburg, since the only people you two lived with were Techno and Ranboo. And occasionally Niki would show up as well.
So he was in utter and pure shock and disbelief when he heard you shout "fuck!" at the top of your lungs, after falling over while Techno was teaching you how to spar.
Techno immediately dismissed Phil's suspicion torwards him, saying he wouldn't swear in the presence of the child in question. Phil had questioned you in a serious matter, asking who taught you that word, he had his suspicions but he was definitely caught off guard as you mentioned Bad's name.
He had already tried to keep you away from the demon, because of all the mans weird connections with the egg cult and other weird shit. And he didn't even know you had met Bad. He just dismissed it and told you to not talk to that man again, which you happily obliged.
Jschlatt
Schlat wasn't necessarily like other parents, he wasnt the best parent either. So it wouldn't be surprising if you had learned most of your bad influences from him. But besides all those odds, your first curse word wasnt from him.
He already had alot of issues, he wasnt at all fit to lead a country, and his alcohol problems had a vice-like grip on his life. So when he heard you cursing under your breath as you scribbled on paper in his office one day, he simply lifted his brow.
"where'd you learn that, Pumpkin?" he hummed, dismissing his more important paperwork aside.
As stated before, he wasnt necessarily a good parent, he was just simply intrigued on how you knew that language at your age. And more interested in who taught you that, since you weren't allowed to leave the white house without him or Quackity.
And if it turned out to be Quackity who taught you that (which wouldn't be that surprising), he swears he'd had that fuckers head.
He may not have paid alot of attention to you growing up, but he did care about you. Even if he didn't show it. So it wasn't a joke when he said he'd have the person's head who taught his kid swear words.
You had simply turned to him "that scary guy with the horns and white eyes said it while i was on a walk with Mr. Quackity" you hummed, then immediately turning back into your drawings.
Schlatt blinked at you in disbelief, before bursting into laughter "oh that demon fucker?! He bothers everyone else on their language and then swears infront of a child?" he took a deep inhale to calm his laughter, before his eyes turned dark "the nerve.."
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I was gonna do more characters, but this is already long enough. Hope everyone liked this, and my requests are still open! <3
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littlenahsstuff · 3 years
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In love, I swear.
A/n Literally my first time writing actual fanfiction. This might be a flaming dumpster fire idk. I will persevere and cringe later, but for now, enjoy.
supreme!Cordelia Goode x reader
TW:nothing much, just a big old fluffernutter sandwich. A little angst. Swears I guess.
Synopsis: Cordelia has just recruited you to be a counselor at Robicheauxs and it's safe to say you are head over heels for the supreme. Unfortunately, you aren't the one to tell her.
You always thought that you weren't too special of a witch, you had the basic witchy spells down and specialized in the people who struggled on the inside... but in a more witchy sense. You also helped the witches who needed to get their powers more developed or who ones that are just behind in school. A sort of glorified counselor you suppose. It's sorta funny, especially since you aren't the most confident, how you can talk to all of the girls. When it boils down to it you are just a witchy gal searching for love. Specifically Cordelia's. It could never happen though.
Your love life wasn't the only area you lacked in before Robicheauxs, you had been struggling to find a job suited for your interests. Let's just say that you have a lifetime ban from one of the Mcdonalds in Louisiana. Fire and grease doesn't mix.
Of course, if it wasn't for dear, sweet, precious, Cordelia, you would be living on the streets. Luckily that didnt happen and so here you are today, three months in to your teaching position at Robicheauxs.
Oh, the moment, "You're hired. I look forward to expanding the academy's family and getting to know you better especially," left the Supremes lips, the better off you were.
And yet, even with all of the joy that comes with finally getting paid, there were the challenges as well. For starters, everyone was extremely nice to you, even though you kept mostly to yourself, there was this one person that made this heaven more hellish. Madison the bitch witch Montgomery.
You had been warned by Zoe, your closest confidante in this new place and also Madisons freaking girlfriend, that she was no pleasant peach. Never in all of your doubtful thoughts, had how bad it actually was crossed your mind. It was never the cockiness that got to you, you had a different appreciation for it than most. Found the confidence refreshing almost. No, no no no no. It was in fact, that she was constantly trying to dig up dirt on you.
"You're too much of a goody two shoes y/n," she once stated with a glare. The same day you had heard Zoe squabbling about something and your name came up. Your name and the fact Madison had stolen your wallet to look at your license. It turned up later on your bed stand.
Madison's a lover of Zoe and drama you've come to find out.
It's harmless though really, you dont mind the extra bit of attention that comes with it. Its flattering so no need to complain to anybody, especially not Cordelia.
Cordelia, mmm, yeah now shes the biggest threat here. She is the reason you got this job and might be the reason you lose it.
She once caught you with your doodle journal. It was a harmless question,
"Y/n, what're you drawing?" She looked over your shoulder. You almost jumped out of your skin and your sketchbook went flying.
"Oh dear, are you alright?" She worried her lips a bit. Her big, plump, kissable lips. Come on Y/n, get out of it.
"Yes," you squeaked. Sinking farther into the sofa. She chuckled her beautiful chuckle and sat on the couch arm.
"So, what was my favorite school counselor drawing just then?" She questioned. Glancing to the thrown book.
Your face went red.
"Uh-" you paused, come on you're making it a bigger deal than it has to be, "you." You couldn't look into her eyes.
She gazed at you at you and it felt like a hole was being burned into your skull.
"Okay," Cordelia said, leaving it at that. Stood up and made to walk away.
"Wait!" She paused and turned back to you, seeing you scramble to get your sketchbook.
"Yes?" Her eyebrows raised in surprise.
"I- don't you want to see it?" You said and you slapped yourself mentally for about the hundredth time she walked in.
She smiled softly at you, "Of course, I thought you didn't. You looked scared to death, like bambi."
"Okay," you flipped back towards the page and cringed. It wasn't your best peice. You could never capture her beauty right.
Her eyes scanned over it, widening before squinting with her grin.
"It's so good!" She gasped.
"Yes, that is Cordelia Goode," you joked in a monotone manner. She slapped your shoulder jokingly, making you snort.
"You nerd, I didn't mean it that way. Either way, you did a fantastic job! I wished I looked as good as you make me seem," she muttered the last bit, bit you heard it. It saddens you to remember the damage Fiona did.
"Hey, Cordy," you started. You realized that you used a nickname that Madison did, but she doesn't seem to care.
"You know what I think? I think that you're wrong. You see I just can't for the life of me get your soft proud loving smile right. Your eyes aren't as warm and glowing as they are in reality. I couldn't manage to picture the right placement for those worry lines or crowd feet you have. You might not like them, but to me they show that you worry and care and that you laugh at the stupidest of things, which is a trait I adore. You are more perfect than any Davinci or Van Gogh," you say. You don't like when your friends feel bad about themselves.
Cordelia's tearing up a bit and wiles it away. "Didn't know you were a goddamn poet too?" She joked with a giggle, "thanks y/n, sometimes I need to hear something like that."
"No problem Cordelia," I can't help it, you're my muse, is what you want to say.
"Well, I have some paperwork, but it was nice to see ya," she hurriedly excused and rushed out.
Unbeknownst to you, Madison was watching. She knew exactly how to get dirt on you now. She had something all along.
The next week you spent daydreaming about Cordy...elia, you couldnt help but go back to that conversation. You needed to be more discrete, way more descrete.
So you made sure to draw your crush no more. That didn't change the fact you forgot to destroy the evidence in writing.
You had slept in a little too late, so in a rush you were to get to your office. The reason you had being you daydreaming about Cordelia and yours faux life together a little too long.
A bunch of new juicy stuff for Madison as she snatched it from your bedside table. It was too easy really.
She opened it up to the first page. It acted like a normal diary, just stating checklists of things to do and things you did. The size was fairly large, so skipping a few pages till she got to the juicy stuff and the part where you actually did know Cordy wasn't harmful.
It was a barf fest of emotion. "Oh Cordelia is so awesome, oh I'm so lucky to work with Cordelia, oh my, I won't ever get a chance with Cordelia, she's the supreme!"
"Ew," Madison groaned, whipping out her phone.
Then she found it, the goldmine of confessions. It was all the way in the back, meaning you had wrote it recently.
"Dear, myself
Cordelia today caught me drawing a picture of herself and said something I didn't particularly enjoy listening about herself. I can't believe Fiona would send her into such a deep hatred of herself that even with her gone she's hurting. She's no mother. Cordelia is the love of my life, even if I'm not hers, she deserves all the love I can give. She's not broken, but she just needs someone to love her and I do. I promise to give her as much love as possible without her finding out what kind it really is, I'm in love, I swear.
Sincerely, Y/N."
So she snapped a picture of the page.
After school was over Cordelia was not expecting Madison to barge into her office. Let alone with something regarding YOU of all people.
"Cordy, I've got something to tell you about y/n!" Madison sang out, waving her phone in front of Cordelia's face as she sat on top her desk.
Madison was just careless with others and too carried g about herself. It was the perfect storm. The only person who could ever take it too far to just prove a point. That there was something wrong with you.
If Madison Montgomery had taken one moment to actually think about it, she was just jealous. Jealous that another person at the coven was better than her to Cordelia. She was one spoiled bitch growing up. Guess it backfired.
"What?" Cordelia questioned in concern, "Is she okay? Madison what did you do to her!?" Her thoughts raced, Madison's pranks often went a little too far. She did kill Misty.
"Now now Cordy, don't get your panties in a twist. Here read this," Madison demanded to her supreme, she shoved it into her face and Cordelia grabbed it.
Her eyes expected headlines on the news or a mugshot, but she realized it was just your writing.
"Madison," she warned.
"Come on, I know you can read!" Madison poked Cordelia's forehead, prompting a slap from the Supreme.
Ms. Goode exhaled, "Fine."
Her eyes fluttered over the words, brows furrowing with every sentence. She couldn't comprehend, could she read?? It seemed to her as if her brain was creating what she wanted to see, but no, you wrote it. Unfortunately.
Everything's silent. Then the thought flits across her head, you like her back.
"In love, I swear."
Oh she's mad. Not at you, no, she could never. Madison on the other hand better,
"Get out of my office right now," Cordelia whispered. Madison's smile faltered.
"What, didn't you want to know your feelings are reciprocated? Come on, I'm just trying to get you two to speed up the process." Madison hopped of the desk and sauntered out.
What has she done.
Cordelia was wracked with guilt for awhile, with no way to tell you either. How does one even go about telling someone they read their deepest darkest secrets. How!?
She couldn't, so she did what she could. She pulled away from you and into her work. All of those lunches spent together stopped. The nights in the green house gone. Reading together on the weekends by the fire, gone.
And it left you empty. You had no idea what you did, but you must've done something.
So you decided to confront her, you hadn't gone much sleep since, so you were literally and figuratively tired of all of this shit.
Your knock on the door startled Cordelia, but your presence startled her even more. Both of you looked like wrecks.
"Oh, Y/n! Please, come in," Cordelia gestured and you did, closing the door behind you.
It was then that you finally broke down.
"What did I do Delia!?" You sobbed, falling to your knees. Yes it was dramatic and not even you expected it but you were holding your emotions for so long.
"Oh," Cordelia briskly moved over to you, concern painted on her face. She was watching you carefully, you looked so fragile. Just like she had felt at times.
"I'm sorry," you whimpered, "What did I do?" Her hand tilted your head towards her, but you still couldn't look into her brown eyes, opting for the floor. If you did, you probably wouldn't be able to look away.
"Y/n look at me sweetie," the nicknames never failed to make your heart soar. It was your weakness, your eyes met and they were glued there.
"What did I do?"
"Nothing nothing!" She took a deep breath, "I saw a page from your journal."
You froze, terror crept up your spine.
"Oh my god. Um Cordelia I am so sorry, you, wow I- god I'm so creepy! It's perfectly fine if you want to not be my friend or fire me. I didn't do it to be weird, it was how I expressed myself. I was trying to hide it I promise, i dont even know what happened!?"
"I'm gonna kill Madison, faster than my mother did," Cordelia groaned.
"Wh-" your brain malfunctions. Is-Is Cordelia kissing you? Right now?
Indeed she was and just like you dreamed about, her lips were so soft and her kiss gentle.
Maybe Madison could be forgiven... but not without a harsh talk.
"In love, I swear," she repeated in a whisper against your lips.
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mitts2002 · 3 years
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Band AU - Gojo Satorou
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Gojo satorou had it all. Brains, looks, charms, could dance and play guitar and even draw. But the one thing he couldnt have was you, not that anything was stopping him. (Y/N) simply didnt want to date someone in a band who looked like they would fuck any pretty thing that walks by.
You didnt like judging someone from their appearance after all the saying goes ‘you cant judge a book by its cover’ but when the book looked and behaved like Gojo could anyone blame you. 
Of course Gojo had everything a person could wish for and that included pride. His stubbornness and pride did not allow him to back down, especially when the challenge was as entertaining and as cute as you.
“what is it now Gojo?“
“cant a friend just stop by to say hey?“
“hm yeah they can a shame were not friends though“
“and why would that be (Y/N) my beautiful appearance and dazzling personality too much for you to handle“
“wow cause everyone loves the looks of a classic fuck boy with the personality of a seven year old. how could I ever resist?”
"Very funny (Y/N) seriously you free for lunch?"
"Gojo I told you countless times before I'm busy and don't wanna go out. Wouldn't you rather meet with your members or something?"
"I thought lunch with you would be nice"
The saddened expression on Gojos face as he said made you want to break the restrictions you put on yourself. Dating a famous guitarist who also happens to be a womaniser was no good you told yourself. The last thing you wanted was the attention.
"Come on just a little date it could even be here if you don't feel like going out anywhere"
He motioned to the bakery you both sat inside of. Well he sat inside of while you stood at the counter trying to catch a glimpse of his blue eyes that was hidden behind large black sunglasses.
(Y/N) felt a migrane coming on. Whether it was from dealing with customers in the little bakery all day or the fact that your most loyal customer happened to be a complete nuisance didn't matter. You needed the headache to stop and you knew there was only one way how.
"Fine! one date and it happens here. Just let me finish my shift in peace please"
You finally gave in feeling slight shame at how fast you broke and gave into his constant pestering. The man just wouldn't shut up. After getting shut down many times over and over, after being sarcastic and sassy and extremely cold to him the guitarist wouldn't budge.
The date between you both was quiet, or as quiet as you could get with Gojo. You were on the closing shift so you had the shop to yourselves, soft music playing in the background while you both ate some pastries and chatted.
Eventually a song Gojo enjoyed had come on and the moment he started singing along you finally started to see why many loved him. Sure his personality was childish and downright annoying but he was also vibrant and lively.
For the bands lead guitarist his vocals were definitely no joke. For the first time ever you were glad he had come by today, and soon without realising it the eccentric guitarists little visits became the favourite part of your day.
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babysizedfics · 3 years
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2! - 👑
baby vee on the loose in just a diaper
vote from this concept voting post!
warning: this includes tickling and light teasing and is INCREDIBLY adorable
one day vee is in her slightly older headspace that being 18 months - which coincidentally is the age babies start running
now roman (whos not little) and patton are just chilling in romans room talking and waiting for logan to finish changing vee into a diaper so they can all play with the baby
when suddenly they hear a muffled "Vee, sit back- Baby! Baby, no, no no come back! BABY-"
that is followed by quick little footsteps appraching the door and light giggles - then vee pushes the door open, jiji clutched to her chest, dressed in a pink crop top that reads "cute" in rainbow letters and a pink and white diaper and literally nothing else
roman and patton instantly burst out laughing because she toddles into the room so quickly but shes so wobbly! wearing a diaper makes it hard to walk for her because of the thick padding so she really is toddling like a baby
and she immediately darts to the bed where roman is sitting propped against the headboard and he hurriedly opens his arms just in time for her to literally collapse on his chest and wriggle around to straddle his lap, all while squeaking in laughter
"heya, titch," roman giggles, holding her steady. "did you escape, huh?" and he feels so delighted and amused that her diaper is on full display and is crinkling loudly when vee giggles and wriggles.
"Vee?? Baby, where are you?!" logan sounds panicked in the hallway
"in here loganberry!" patton chuckles, his phone pulled out and clearly capturing a ton of photos of this moment
but vee whines and quickly hides her face in romans shoulder and covers her head with jiji
Roman giggles "whatcha doin, baby?"
and she responds from her hiding place "umbibible"
"youre what?" patton frowns, still smiling though
roman chuckles understanding what she means "are you invisible?"
vee nods and squeals in delight. "shh shh bimbible!"
"ohh okay, shh shh" roman whispers and nods very seriously and cradles the back of her shoulders and diaper to hold her safe and help her hide. "invisible"
logan suddenly bursts in looking stressed as heck and sighs in relief when he sees vee in romans lap
"hey specs, whats got you so frazzled?" roman asks and bites his lip to contain his laughter
after a brief moment taking a deep breath and running his hand back through his hair, logan has recomposed himself. "hello roman. Could you do me a favor and hand over the baby in your lap?"
then roman frowns. "what baby?"
vee giggles and buries her head more in romans neck. he doesnt mind the slight ache at all
logan smiles humourlessly. "very funny, but I need to get her dress on"
"i dont think it would fit you, honey" patton jokes from behind his phone.
roman snorts
logan stares at patton, expressionless
and then roman notices that the way patton holds the camera is so obvious he is taking a VIDEO of this exchange. roman hugs vee tighter with pride
"okay, i really do need to get the baby dressed though" logan insists to roman with a little smile
roman makes a show of looking around the room, avoiding looking down at the adorable mound of pink and white in his lap. "sorry, i dont see any baby"
vee squirms and her diaper crinkles loudly. then they all hear the tiniest babyish whisper. "bimbible"
they're all trying so hard not to laugh now, logan is like biting his cheek to stop smiling and sternly says "roman, I need to get your baby sibling dressed"
"logan i literally have no idea where she is!"
vee giggles and kicks her feet lightly in excitemnt
a choked laugh escapes patton before he scrunches his face to stop it, and logan closes his eyes, his face twitching with the effort not to laugh. romans the best at holding in laughter but he's close to breaking he can tell
"okahay" logan says with a concealed chuckle. "okay, then. roman can you please help me find the baby?"
roman gasps dramatically. "logan, you lost the baby?! What kind of a mother are you!!"
and vee suddenly squeals loud and highpitched into romans shoulder and wiggles so much that shes basically vibrating with excitement
everyone silently wheezes at the reaction: logan slams his hand over his mouth and has to hold the wall for support, romans head drops back in a silent scream of laughter and cradles vees head, and pattons eyes squint shut and the camera wobbles as he shakes with silent chuckles
at that point patton knows they need to wrap this up or they'll either burst into loud laughter and risk startling vee, or they'll all run out of breath from trying to hold it back
"if there was a baby in here," he laughs as gently as he can, "then surely she would be invisible, right roman?"
roman agrees "yes obviously, patton" and he sways gently cradling vee because she was constantly squeaking and squirming and they dont want her getting too overexcited
again, vee giggles "bimbible, bimbible!" still hiding in romans shoulder
of course that gives logan an idea
he approaches the bed "well im afraid theres only one way to find invisible babies" he starts very solemnly and perches on the edge of the mattress next to roman and totally not a totally visible baby
then he smiles. "is sheeeee... over here?" he asks, fluttering just one finger over her neck and vee squeaks and pulls jiji down to cover her neck
roman smiles and strokes her now visible purple hair
"hmm" logan hums in thought as patton gets up from the beanbag to get a better angle to film this whole debacle. logan smiles at the camera mischievously for a moment, apparently forgetting his camera shyness in the excitement
"is she perhaps here?" and he scribbles all fingers of one hand over the exposed back of her knee
vee giggles melodically and quickly folds her legs up into romans lap - but her toes are scrunching happily. shes no longer hidden in romans shoulder but is still curled up against his chest and is hiding her face with jiji
"I think I know where the baby is~" logan sings teasingly, and everyone beams and giggles at the way vee wiggles so much that roman has to curl his arms all the way around her and her diaper to stop her from wriggling right off his lap
"she must be...." logan draws it out, wiggling all ten fingers towards her back. "over here!"
logans fingertips land just above the hem of vee's diaper, settling on her sides and the back of her ribs and scribbling and spiralling gently - the diaper hem rustles loudly under his fingers but thats nothing compared to the reaction from vee
she positively screeches with squeaky laughter, dropping jiji instantly to reveal her flushed cheeks and her scrunched up happy eyes and her big big gummy smile! she wriggles around so much and flaps jiji in the air excitedly
and everyone coos "THERE SHE IS~ 💞" in unison
...
when they finish with the tickling and the giggling, logan finally gets vee back in her room to get dressed... but she whines and pouts whenever he tried to put any kind of skirt or pants on her
try as he might logan literally cannot convince vee to wear anymore clothes than she's already wearing - so for a compromise he simply puts on her ruffly white diaper cover !
patton absolutey bursts with love and adorableness when he sees her all smiley and blushy and wriggly in her cute poofy diaper cover and roman giggles and thinks about how much fun it'll be to remind vee about this tomorrow >:3c
for the entire day everyone is just so giggly because vee is in the most playful happy baby mood, she loves not wearing any pants or skirts and keeps wiggling on her butt to hear the diaper crinkles and kicking her bare legs in excitement and squeals
...
the next morning roman absolutely follows through on his promise to himself and tells vee all about it
vee is so so embarrassed, blushing like mad and hiding her face behind logans shoulder as everyone smiles and tries not to giggle too hard at her reaction
"oh my god, why didnt anyone dress me??"
"you put up quite a fight" logan says so casually it almost sounds like he isnt grinning ear to ear. "youre very persuasive when you pout, princess"
vee pulls away from him with a very appropriate pout
"aww come on dont be embarrassed," patton coos "you were the most adorable little baby in the world yesterday with your poofy little diaper butt"
"dad!" vee squeaks in indignation
everyone giggles at her reaction (and roman sees her lips twitch up in a hidden smile)
roman leans to whisper in her ear "i think you like it~"
"stoooop" vee whines and buries her burning cheeks against romans shoudler instead
big mistake
"wow déja vu" roman chuckles "i guess youre not straddling my lap this time though - all wriggly and giggly and crinkly"
vee pulls back form him with a bewildered look "i was in your lap? and i was only wearing--"
"well sure!" patton chuckles as though its ridiculous vee is even questioning it. "i dunno why youre so suprised, you always sit in your brothers lap. OH I can show you the video to prove it!" and he pulls out his cellphone and starts searching for the video
"i dunno pat, are you sure it will help to watch the video?" roman asks
and for a MILLISECOND vee thinks roman is actually for once showing her mercy
then he smiles at her. "i mean she was 'bimbible', I dunno if you wouldve caught her on camera"
"thats very true," logan nods, sipping his coffee with a smirk "though it might be worth reviewing the footage purely for research purposes"
patton laughs "oh of course, we really have to check if you can see 'bimbible' babies on camera... oop, i think we can!"
patton beams and holds up his phone to show a picture of vee curled up against romans chest, half-naked and with romans hands curled round her shoulders and the top of the diaper, his head thrown back and clearly in the midst of delighted laughter
vee squeaks and pulls minty from their seat at the breakfast table to bury her face in them. "youre my only ally minty" she whispers into their fluff as the family all coo over the adorable photos
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marvel-m-lee · 3 years
Text
Alone, Bored and Mischievous~
Words- 2034
Fandom- Rick and Morty
Focus Characters- you, Jerry, Rick
Summary- You were bored in the house and in the house bored, everyone else was out apart from Jerry so you decided to hang out with your favourite dad.
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You were bored as fuck. You wondered around the house, unsure if what to do. Everyone seemed to be doing their own things; summer had gone to the mall with Beth- your adopted mother- Jerry was reading a newspaper in his 'man cave', Morty was out and you had no clue where Rick had gone so you assumed the two were on an adventure.
You wandered around the house aimlessly. Usually you'd go out with friends or have plans but everyone else had plan today with family or dates or other shit. So you were left alone.
You looked at the couch, sitting down and wondering if you should watch some interdimentional tv, you turned the tv on and grabbed a remote, sitting on the couch.
You were wearing some pretty lazy stuff although it was hot out. It wasn't burning but it was definitely hot enough, you wore an over sized baby blue t-shirt with a little bee on the breast saying 'bee-kind' and some casual black leggings with no socks or shoes. Your hair was down and partly messy, thought you had brushed it prior.
You flicked through a variety of shows, ranging from cartoons to 4th Dimensional shit. But nothing grabbed your interest, you mostly just wanted to do something, not just sit around. You looked at the nintendo, perhaps you could play some games? But the idea quickly faded as you just weren't interested in it right now.
You got up and turned off the TV, putting the remote back. You even thought about eating, but you were just bored so there was no point.
You then decided to go nose around the house, no one was hone so it couldn't hurt right? You'd already nosed around in the main areas so you decided to go to Rick's room.
Ah what a genius you are.
Fucking nutcase.
Anyways you slopped off to his room, you wandered down the downstairs hall behind the stairs and quickly found the old farts room. You peeked inside, no one around, you looked around to make sure no one was around either, Jerry would have been to busy to notice anyway.
You stepped into the room and looked around, a messy bed, messy floors, his notes covered his walls, boxes were stacked upon each other filled with whatever Rick collected, his draws were slightly open and random clothing and paper falling down and more. You looked over the mans bed, questioning how he could sleep on a bed so low and so unsteady.
Even this bored you, you really had nothing catching your interest, even mischief was killing you.
You left the room, though before you did, you left a little surprise for Rick under his bed.
You left and trotted down the halls, finding your way to Jerry's man cave. Maybe you could hang out with him, he was like your dad after all.
You entered the room to see him sitting on a recliner chair watching some show about you had no clue, nor did you take any interest.
"Hey J" you rhyme, smiling at him. Jerry paused the show quickly and sat up smiling too. He waved pathetically but appreciated the nickname. You usually did this anyway, and he had a nickname for you too.
"Hey Mischief" he said, one of the best nicknames he'd come up with in a while, though he'd been calling you it for years. You usually caused mischief in the family, earning you the appropriate title.
You wandered over to Jerry, standing next to the recliner and looking at the TV. "What cha watching?"
"Nothing, what cha doing?" Jerry asked, brushing off his show. You raised an eyebrow and smirked.
"I'm just hanging out with my favourite dad"
Jerry's face went sick and tears filled his eyes at the thought.
"Awwww y/n!" Jerry got up and pulled you into a hug making you laugh, you swatted him away, pulling out of it.
"Alright sap king" you laughed, Jerry just rolled his eyes.
"Anyway what are really up too?" Jerry asked, knowing your mischievous ways. You shrugged with a slight smirk, you really wanted to cause some mischief right now.
"Uh-huh... okay-" Jerry eyes you but the two of you left to go to the kitchen to grab a drink. You chatted about some strange things and then about a job for Jerry.
"Yeah I found this job application" you explained, leaning over the kitchen's side as he got you both a drunk from the sink.
"No way really?!" He asked excitedly. "What about?"
"Its nothing fancy, just a couple of ads" you shrugged as if it was nothing, taking the water Jerry had poured out for you.
"Thank you y/n! Thank you thank you thank you!" Jerry jumped with joy as the two of you headed into the living room to watch TV. And seeing a way to cause mischief you jumped over the couch and slid right under where Jerry was about to sit.
"Y/n!"
"Jerry!"
Then when he went to sit next to you you just laid across the whole couch.
"Jerry I'm trying to watch TV!" You whined, pointing at the black screen. Jerry loomed at the TV to see if you actually were, but obviously you weren't, just pulling his leg. You burst out laughing and he mocked you.
"Ha ha! Very funny. Now move" he ordered, though it was in his own pathetic Jerry way.
"Nah, I'm quite comfortable here" you explained, placing the drink on the table and stretching out with your arms under your head like when someone was sunbathing.
"Oh really now?" Jerry asked, putting his drink down too. A slight teasing in his voice.
"Mhm! You should try this out- oh wait" you laughed in mockery, only joking around as not to hurt his feelings. But quickly your laughter turned slient as he fluttered his hands over your open armpits. Your eyes opened wide and you stared st the Jerry looking down at you, glaring at him.
You had closed your armpits now, looking a little silly on the couch having lost your confidence. Jerry noticed this and smirked, smiling as though he had no clue what was going on.
"Is everything okay?" He taunted. He was a dumbass, a pain in the ass, pathetic, but a great dad for the most part. He knew in every way to embarrass his kids and loved to do it together it was on purpose or just his pathetic ways.
You glared at him, staying in the same position.
"Jerry."
"Y/n?"
The smirk on his face only grew as he acted more and more stupid. He reached his hand down and squeezed your belly, making you jerk and almost fall off the sofa though you didnt due to him being there.
"Jeherry. Jerry dont" you ordered, though it partly sounded like pleading, your hidden laughter mixing with your words. Jerry only answered with a little squeeze in the centre of your belly making a dumb smile break through on your mouth before you quickly got rid of it.
"What's wong y/n?" Jerry teased in a babys voice. You always hated when he did that, making you giggle even more but trying to act tough you tried your hardest not to laugh.
"N-nothing. Move ya big ball sack!" You told him, pushing him out of your face, holding back giggles. You always sounded like such a baby when you giggled, especially nervously. Not like the strong independent wOmAn you are on missions who can fight and comprehend almost anything.
"Hehey! Watch it" Jerry laughed as he was pushed backwards. You chuckled as he fell backwards a little bit but stay stood up over you. He had a wide smirk on his mouth and you were doubting whether or not you should have caused mischief in the first place.
"Y/n?" He asked, stepping closer sl you couldn't run.
"W-what?" You stuttered, a bit nervous now.
"I have a question"
"I don't think I wanna hear it-" you muttered slightly, looking for a way of escapism.
"Please! Just one tiny little question." He begged as he crouched down, trying to hide his smirk. You never minded when Jerry tickled you, you didn't hate being tickled either, you actually enjoyed the memories but you hated the taunting, the taughtig was terrible. You'd go all ready and squeal, unable to talk from being flustered so much.
But you knew there was no escape from this.
"Jerrryyyyy" you begged silently.
"Pleaseeeeee?"
You sighed, looking down in defeat.
"What..."
"Y/n?"
"What Jerry!" You whined, pooking up into his eyes. Though it was a horrible mistake, full of mischief and taunting, a large smirk on his face.
His hands darted to your sides as he threw you back.
"Are you ticklish?" He knew the answer, darting his hands up your sides making you squeal suddenly and then giggle like a child as you were slammed into the couch. You desperately pushed at his hands as your face turned a light pink.
"Jeheherry! Nohoho" you giggled, pushing and wiggling out of his grip. He grabbed you though and threw you onto the couch slightly, you were a great fighter, slippery and incredible but you were light as a feather no matter what. Even Jerry could swoop you up for a quick moment.
He stood over you as his hands squeezed and dances over the skin, slowly making their way up your ribs making you kick out as you tried to hide tour laughter, clamming your mouth shut so no one would hear, though no one was home and everyone knew except Rick.
"MmMHMm!" You muffled and tried to compel your laughter, wiggling as Jerry straddled you between his legs, dancing his fingers up your ribs. Weak bitch in fighting but tickle fights? It was such a Jerry thing.
He even fir a quick moment brought a hand to your neck, light tickles causing you to tuck in as he brought it back down to your side and ribs. You pushed and pulled at his wrists but nothing worked. You were dying behind a clenched smile.
Jerry skillfully shot his hands into your armpits making you squeal extremely loud, almost rolling off the couch with giggly screeching laughter. It wasn't even your worst spot, you were just surprised.
You rolled off the couch and ran to the kitchen, standing over the counter so Jerry couldn't get you easily, and good thing too, you both heard a voice call out if everything was alright in there and Rick stood outside the garage door with his casual light blue shirt on and pants having working on something in the garage this whole time.
You turned around for a split second to see if Rick was actually there, Jerry detracted too. You quickly span around though and pointed a finger from him to Rick.
"HE CAN NEVER FIND OUT!" You yelled particularly loud, a slight bit out of breath from the attack. Your face was bright red by now and your hair a bit messy. Jerry was smiling wide and laughing at your reaction. Rick just gave it a weird ass look.
"What uurrp-" Rick questioned before being interrupted by his own burp. You only snapped your neck to look at him so he could see your bright red and flustered face.
"What the-"
"SHUT UP"
"She's really-" you snapped your head and glared at Jerry, screaming.
"SHUT UP JERRY!" You really never minded the tickles, but once more, having to watch someone let out your secret of being tickled? It only meant the other person would tickle you more. It was human. And embarrassing.
You didnt care if Rick knew, but you really did. You didnt wanna seem weak, or babish. You didn't want him to know you actually enjoyed the tournament, not that anyone did know. Still.
"FUCK YOU ALL" You yelled, walking out of the room, bright and flustered.
Rick gave you a look and then Jerry, Jerry put up a hand to talk.
"She's really-" he whispered slightly but you leaned back into the room and yelled at him to shut up.
"NO!"
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shhh-no-ones-home · 3 years
Text
December 3 - vinny mauro
title: picture perfect couple
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prompt: Person A talks person B into taking family photos with them to get their family off their back this holiday season
request from: n/a
tag list: @musicsexandpizza69 @svintsandghosts @alilpunkrock @cynic-spirit @theoneandonlykymberlee @thisplace-ishaunted @lifeisabitchandsoareyou
++++
"Shit."
I said, looking over my mother's text. She had sent it to all of us. All five of us, me and my 2 brothers and 2 sisters.
"What's wrong?"
Vinny asked, looking down into the funyuns bag and pulling one out.
"My mother wants us kids to send out Christmas cards to her and the family."
He looked confused.
"What's wrong with that?"
I sent him a panicked look, a whine escaping my throat.
"How am I gonna explain to this woman that I am twenty six and single even though I told her I wasn't. And what's worse is she said she is sending us each a check to pay for it."
I clicked my phone off and dropped into the couch, sinking into it and sulking at my new dilemma. I heard him laugh and slowly turned my head to look at what could be so funny.
"What?"
he shrugged, popping another chip in his mouth.
"ill be your fake boyfriend."
he said and i snorted.
"you most certainly will not."
i said and he frowned.
"why not? its not like we dont have pictures together on your socials, it wouldnt be that suspicious. plus i would make a great fake boyfriend."
i sent him a look and he raised his brows expectantly.
"no."
i said and he shifted in his seat on the couch.
"come on y/n! itll be fun!"
i rolled my eyes at him before giving in.
"fine, but you have to take this seriously vin, i mean it."
i pointed in his direction and he crossed his finger over his heart.
"i promise i will take this as seriously as you need me to. and i vow to be the best photo buddy."
i sent him a look before turning my phone back on to text my mother back.
---
the day was finally here, our photoshoot for the Christmas cards.
"vin are you done yet?"
i called down the hall, hearing grunting and drawing my brows.
"you good in here?"
i asked, pushing the door open. in front of me was vin on the floor, his shirt disheveled and his jeans half way up his thighs. i couldnt help laughing at his predicament.
"what the hell are you doing?"
i said amused and he sighed.
"this isnt working."
i shook my head.
"well it would help if you unbuttoned them."
he sent me a dumb look.
"you think i didnt try that first?"
he said and i shook my head, standing over him and leaning down to undo the pants. i frowned when the button popped but the zipper wouldnt budge. i stood up, hands going to my hips.
"alright, take them off."
i said and he sat up, his brows drawn.
"what?"
i moved to the closet.
"we'll try something else."
i heard him struggle to stand.
"but didnt your mom want all matching outfits? thats why she sent them."
i shrugged, pulling a similar pair of his own jeans out and tossing them over to him.
"she shouldve thought about that before buying jeans with a faulty zipper, now get dressed, we're gonna be late."
i said, leaving him standing there in his boxers. i walked quickly down the hallway to the kitchen, finishing breakfast for the two of us so we could take it to go. when he came in he did a spin.
"this look alright?"
he said and i nodded, handing him the muffin and kissing his cheek.
"yes, now lets get a move on it."
---
as we finished the last set of pictures i couldnt help laughing at vin. he had been a light in the darkness the whole two hours we had been out here so far and i was glad he had talked me into this. i was just hoping the pictures turned out as good as i felt they did, even though i had seen anything to suggest good or bad.
"no!"
i yelled as he ran up behind me, tossing leaves my way and making me laugh. i heard the camera click a few times as he hugged me from behind, a wide smile across his lips.
"why not?"
he joked, leaning down and kissing my cheek. i nodded my head, looking into his eyes as he pulled away.
"youll get them in my hair."
i said matter-of-factly and he mocked me.
"oh, youll get them in your hair? is that right?"
he asked and i nodded.
"yes, that is right."
i said and he shook his head, picking me up and slinging me over his shoulder.
"Vincenzo! put me down!"
i screeched, the photographer laughing at us.
"actually thats brilliant."
she said and i sent her a concerned look.
"stay right there."
she said, moving forward to tilt his head so he was looking over his opposite shoulder. she then handed me the 'family christmas' plaque, moving back to her spot.
"youre doing perfect y/n, just one more."
she said, taking a few more snap shots. when she looked at them she smiled back at me.
"i think we've got it."
she said, vinny bouncing up and making me gasp before he dropped me down onto the ground making me laugh. as i was going down though i grabbed him and pulled him into the pile of dead leaves with me.
"aw come on!"
he said as i rolled on top of him, straddling him and dropping leaves on top of his chest. he sent me an annoyed look before sitting up quickly and all the leaves falling to the forest floor around us.
"thats rude."
he said, draping his arms around my waist.
"thats payback baby."
i said, poking his nose. he scrunched it at me, leaning forward.
"its rude."
i shook my head.
"you brought this on yourself."
i said.
"oh!"
the photographer said, taking both our attention.
"i know i said i was done but thats perfect. could i get you two to kiss though?"
she asked and my eyes went wide, my head snapping in the vinnys direction. he had a nervous smile on his face.
"we dont have to if you dont want to."
he said and i thought for a second.
"what the hell."
i said, holding his head lightly and leaning in. when our lips connected i heard the camera shutter a few times. i drew back, resting my forehead against his but keeping my eyes closed.
"i love you."
he said lightly and my eyes snapped open. he had a lazy smile on his lips and i couldnt help melting a little bit.
"i love you too vin."
i said and he pulled me in for another kiss. when i pulled away again he moved his hands back to my waist.
"guess you dont have to worry about having a fake boyfriend any more."
he said and i raised a brow.
"oh?"
i could see the blush creeping its way to his face.
"that is, if you dont mind taking this to another level."
i laughed a little bit and nodded.
"id love that vin."
he sent me a toothy smile, pulling me in for a hug.
"you have no idea how glad i am to hear that."
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unironicduncanstan · 3 years
Text
the “Tangodeltaindia” blog explained,
aka my brain has cringe spots on it and needs to be inspected by the FDA
hi my names randi/uni and i created a total drama island themed ARG two months ago on a whim that almost no one interacted with bc i started off way too niche and difficult, so i kinda just went increasingly off the rails because i knew most likely no one was monitoring my posts and i could just make a real cursed hidden tomb that could one day be discovered by someone in a goonies esque unveiling. but then i got lice and now im sad and uncomfortable so i’m just gonna explain the entire damn thing in one shot. its absolutely batshit and theres a reason no one uncovered it ok here we go;;;
first of all the name. its so stupid but. ‘tango delta india’ = ‘tdi’ in the NATO phonetic alphabet. it just felt like a funny place to start that implies its gonna be a puzzle blog idk,
moving on to the actual content tho; some of the earlier posts mean p much nothing and were just an attempt to draw people in, such as the mr coconut ‘like if you agree’ or the ‘let him inside hes cold’ posts. 
then theres the cipher (x). it was posted shortly after the height of the ‘using total drama reference pictures to make an alphabet’ meme. in case anybody didnt see that; for a while it was a joke in the fandom to take the transparent references of total drama characters, and line them up, using them like hieroglyphics to make translatable pictures. its supposed to correspond to the alphabet, based on the first letter of their first name. an example could be, alejandro = a, bridgette = b, and so on. there was no solidly set alphabet amongst the fandom though, it was self explanatory most of the time so i made my own solid personal cipher key for that blog to make the whole thing easier.
NOW ONTO THE FIRST PUZZLE POST,,,, (x). theres a scene, a string of text, the cipher key, and a link to a decoder. the way to decode it all is to plug the characters on screen into the tangodeltaindia cipher key, and then plug That translation into the decoder website, and then finally paste in the text under the photo. 
the website linked is to a Caesar cipher decoder. the Caesar cipher is just a code where the alphabet is assigned to numbers (a=1, z=26), and to encode something with it you can move this pattern however you want as long as you keep the regular sequence of alphabet and numbers. so you could scootch over One letter, and “abc” would now say “bcd”. so on and so forth.
looking at the scene + my own total drama reference cipher, alejandro = A, and the beaver = 1, which gives A1. so you could now follow the link to the website, press ‘decode’, and paste in the text under the picture. the ‘shift’ in the middle is automatically set to ‘7′, or as it shows, a -> h, meaning ‘a’ has been moved over by 7 letters. so if you set the shift to just 1 over, or A1, now you can translate the text. it reads;
“lets start simple. after all, a trail of breadcrumbs begins with a loaf. whats the harm in another long winded fandom meme. another inside joke. and arent you curious whats truly lurking inside?”
edgy! simple! kinda just a test to see if people would do it or not. which they didnt so of course i tried to make it weirder-
puzzle 2; (x) using the exact same translation rules as above. we have alejandro and the snake, which with the tangodeltaindia cipher key means A6. going to the website, putting it in ‘decode’ mode, pasting in your text, and setting the shift to ‘6′ gives you this translation.
“in his eyes are an island. nothing but a dream, born out of going to bed angry. sink or swim.”
this was just hinting around at where the story was gonna go so it’ll make more sense later. something else to note; if you zoom all the way in and look into alejandros eye (’in his eyes’), you’ll see the word ‘Thera’. ~thats a surprise tool that will help us later~
so after this one, there are two non-puzzle posts that are also just hints (i was just tryna see if i could get people hyped), the first is a close up picture of chris with red eyes that simply says “those arent his eyes”, and then a post that says “his real names not chris :)”, they’re again referencing his eyes, and this time further implying theres something fake or wrong about them, or with chris as a person. again, it’ll be explained better later on.
moving on to puzzle 3 (x), another test to see if anyones keeping up (which also failed josdfjsdfkjs), using the same translation rules, dj = a dash or minus, and the snail = 5, “-5″, shift the letter ‘A’ BACK five instead of forward, and you get the simple translation of; “getting harder now.”
puzzle 4 and 5; at this point, there are two images posted within hours of each other that i’ll explain together as they line up. (x) (x)
These are some of the only ones that can be translated from just the tangodeltaindia key directly. They end up a string of numbers, which are latitude and longitude coordinates. The first post, labelled “the lie”, translates into “45.57394802102744, -81.46817207492494″. googling that will take you to maps and show you to a place called Lonely Island in Canada.
The second one, “the truth”, translates into “36.404663113177534, 25.39605673375295″, taking you to Santorini, Greece.
This is where the hints got really out there bc i realized nobody was following along but i still wanted to paint a picture. so this is the set up;;; the idea that the ‘island’ (camp wawanakwa) existing somewhere in canada, is a lie. the ‘true’ location being santorini isnt meant to be taken at face value though. the mythology behind santorini is that a man impregnated a goddess and to escape the wrath of her father (triton), she formed the island (santorini) by having her lover throw clay into the sea, and then she gave birth to her son, Theras, on this island, giving the island it’s Other nickname, Thera.
this is again just a vague implication that the island might not be real at all, or that it was formed through cosmic means.
the next two posts are more non-puzzle hints, the first showing the definition of the word ‘fresh’ (new), and the second being images of total drama backgrounds with no characters and the text reading “they were always empty.” more, admittedly very outlandish implications that the island is some kind of illusion, but again mostly just another try to drag people into the blog.
puzzle 6. (x) this one introduces a new concept to the regular translation rules, some of the characters are laying down. its kinda supposed to imply they’re “dead” and that you need to take their corresponding letters out of the alphabet given on the Caesar cipher page, below the shift. The upright characters translate to “-9″, so you shift ‘A’ back 9 letters. Then remove the letters; “TH-E-R-A-S”, and with those letters taken out, you can finally translate the text.
“he creates life solely to destroy it. to crush it in his hands. he births chaos so that he may have something to control. the power has given him madness. the isolation, arrogance. don't try to stop him, he's already chosen to be unstoppable. his mind is a perfectly crafted prison, one we will all soon be living in.”
this is where the story gets more on the nose. it’s talking about chris, and about him being an unstoppable cosmic force, a diety who can create worlds within his own mind, and he does so maliciously just for power. hes created the campers through mental energy just to torment them. it also hints that his plan is to expand the world of total drama island and engulf the whole universe.
puzzle 7. (x) same as the last puzzle. beaver and moose translate to ‘1-0′ or ten. the characters lying down to remove from the caesar cipher alphabet are “T-U-L-P-A”. this doesnt have anything to do with the modern way some ppl interact with tulpas but just the actual idea of creating thoughtforms, or willing your thoughts into real life creations, referencing how chris has created the entire island and everyone on it solely through his mind. with those letters removed and the shift set forward 10, you get this:
“his psychic power is unfathomable. the reality he bore was just a passing thought. an idea that became so dangerous. he predates the idea of a mind, the minds own ability to recognize itself, his synapses are paradoxically ancient. the island exists only within himself, to torment the souls hes created, and damned from the start. will they ever be free?”
it states that chris is more than a man or even just a diety, hes an all powerful god already, yet he craves more power. the final line, “will they ever be free” is in reference to the campers, which segways into the next arc;;; freeing the campers from chris’ psychic island imprisonment.
puzzle 8. (x) to solve this one you have to translate the top image with the tangodeltaindia cipher key, and add it to the text given, which creates a link. this leads to a PDF, a page from a book written by terence mckenna. he’s a famous ethnobotanist known best for his studies on DMT, the strongest hallucinogenic drug in the world, its also known as the spirit molecule. many people on this drug (without any prior knowledge of this phenomenon) will recount meeting strange fractal beings that can create things in the universe just by speaking them into existence, theyve come to be known as ‘machine elves’, a term coined by mckenna. ill show the most important excerpt from the page;
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this is less about the psychedelic drug part and more about the words and ideas, like “punching a hole through a dimension so it pours through” and “if god didnt exist man would invent him”. its more worldbuilding towards chris’ power and cosmic abilities
then come 2 more clues. a picture of chris holding his own body captioned ‘ego death’, and the meaning behind the name ‘chris mcclean’. the latter is another “please look over here” post, but the first is another minor reference to the previous puzzles answer involving DMT and terence mckenna. ‘ego death’ is a term again used with strong psychedelic drugs, its the sensation that your spirit as you know it is literally Dying, and you are instead connected to and a part of everything around you. another reference to chris’ power and how he may look like a man but his body and spirit are connected to the world hes built in unfathomable ways. at this point im cementing the idea that chris mclean is not a mortal man and cannot be fought with mortal weapons
puzzle 9. (x) this one was an attempt to make easier to solve puzzles, and comes with a visual of chris looming over the island. the text is in wingdings, which can be translated through multiple websites found through google. it says;
“s︎o︎o︎n︎ h︎e︎ w︎i︎l︎l︎ s︎l︎e︎e︎p.︎ h︎e︎ w︎i︎l︎l︎ d︎r︎e︎a︎m︎ a︎ n︎e︎w︎ h︎e︎l︎l︎,︎ a︎n︎d︎ t︎h︎a︎t︎ w︎i︎l︎l︎ b︎e︎ o︎u︎r︎ o︎n︎l︎y︎ c︎h︎a︎n︎c︎e︎,︎ t︎o︎ s︎a︎v︎e︎ h︎i︎s︎ c︎r︎e︎a︎t︎i︎o︎n︎s︎,︎ a︎n︎d︎ f︎r︎e︎e︎ t︎h︎o︎s︎e︎ w︎h︎o︎ w︎e︎r︎e︎ n︎e︎v︎e︎r︎ d︎e︎s︎i︎g︎n︎e︎d︎ t︎o︎ b︎e︎ f︎r︎e︎e︎.︎ t︎h︎i︎s︎ m︎a︎y︎ c︎o︎m︎e︎ a︎t︎ a︎ c︎o︎s︎t︎.︎ t︎h︎e︎ n︎i︎g︎h︎t︎m︎a︎r︎e︎ m︎u︎s︎t︎ e︎n︎d︎,︎ t︎h︎e︎ o︎u︎r︎o︎b︎o︎r︎o︎s︎ o︎f︎ h︎i︎s︎ s︎y︎n︎c︎o︎pe︎ m︎u︎s︎t︎ c︎l︎o︎s︎e︎,︎ b︎u︎t︎ i︎t︎ m︎a︎y︎ t︎u︎r︎n︎ o︎u︎r︎ e︎f︎f︎o︎r︎t︎s︎ o︎f︎ s︎a︎l︎v︎a︎t︎i︎o︎n︎ t︎o︎ d︎u︎s︎t︎.︎ o︎u︎r︎ f︎i︎g︎h︎t︎ m︎i︎g︎h︎t︎ e︎n︎d︎ i︎n︎ s︎a︎c︎r︎i︎f︎i︎c︎e︎,︎ r︎e︎n︎d︎e︎r︎i︎n︎g︎ h︎i︎s︎ l︎a︎s︎t︎ i︎n︎v︎e︎n︎t︎i︎o︎n︎ b︎u︎t︎ a︎ c︎e︎a︎s︎e︎l︎e︎s︎s︎ v︎o︎i︎d︎.︎ w︎e︎ m︎a︎y︎ s︎e︎e︎ h︎o︎r︎r︎o︎r︎s︎ t︎h︎a︎t︎ c︎a︎u︎s︎e︎ t︎h︎e︎ s︎t︎a︎r︎s︎ t︎o︎ s︎h︎u︎d︎d︎e︎r︎,︎ b︎u︎t︎ w︎e︎ m︎u︎s︎t︎ t︎a︎ke︎ t︎h︎i︎s︎ c︎h︎a︎n︎c︎e︎.︎ w︎e︎ h︎a︎v︎e︎ n︎o︎t︎h︎i︎n︎g︎ t︎o︎ l︎o︎s︎e︎,︎ a︎n︎d︎ a︎ w︎o︎r︎l︎d︎ o︎f︎ n︎o︎t︎h︎i︎n︎g︎n︎e︎s︎s︎ t︎o︎ e︎n︎d︎.︎ m︎a︎y︎ t︎h︎e︎ s︎e︎a︎ s︎w︎a︎l︎l︎o︎w︎ u︎p h︎i︎s︎ i︎s︎l︎a︎n︎d︎ o︎f︎ l︎i︎e︎s︎.︎ g︎o︎d︎ pr︎o︎t︎e︎c︎t︎ y︎o︎u︎.︎”
this is essentially saying that the island, the campers, werent all just created from his mind, but from his dreams. this confirms that he Sleeps, and claims hes going to sleep again soon, and during that time period theres a chance to kill him before he can dream up another world (or season) to control and torment. its also saying that theres a chance killing him will destroy the island and campers, but that its the only choice we would have to end the cycle. hey guys i am so bored and over the years i have been on every stimulant and anti depressant doctors are legally allowed to prescribe and its still just not quite there yet huh
puzzle 10. (x) the video, the title translates to “the island of his eye”. its just meant to encapsulate everything ive already been hinting around at but with real footage and some audios taken from the show, and again, it was me tryna make some lore that was easy to digest and also terrifying to an audience with no other context. the final images are the only new clues, if you pause fast enough you can barely make out the characters that (paired with the tangodeltaindia cipher key) would say “set them free”, and you can also see an aerial view of what is actually called “the eye of argentina”. it is a real island that rotates atop a swamp, it is geometrically perfect and no one really knows for sure why it rotates the way it does or how it was formed. this clue is simply related back to the idea that the island of wawanakwa’s location is not in canada, and that it does not function like a normal island.
puzzle 11. (x) what td blog is complete without a uquiz? anyways, it doesnt matter how you answer the quiz, theres only one possible result. the title is a link to a mega file, which is protected with a decryption key. the image attached to the result, when deciphered, is the randomly generated key to the unlock the file. the image you see from the file is this; (TW for mentions of self harm and eye trauma)
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in case this is too hard to read ill transcribe what it says;
“How to escape the dream - accept that there is no dream to escape, and no you to escape it. - believe in it anyways. - sleep on your back. - cover your eyes. - hide a nail under the pillow. - wait for the ringing. - when you first see him, dont call his name. dont speak. - keep your eyes shut. - on the second night, ask where the camp is. he wont respond verbally. - on the third night, you’ll see his eyes. - on the fourth night, you’ll enter them. - you can’t turn back after the fifth night. - don’t try to hide your fears. he knows them before you arrive. - don’t shut your eyes for too long when it becomes too much. you risk losing them. - find chris mclean. - don’t stop till the nail is through the socket. - repeat on the other side. - repeat on yourself. - congratulations. they are free”
this is, believe it or not, an idea that comes from my very own sleep paralysis experiences. ive dealt with it a lot, so why not make a weird ritual thing for an arg based off it ig. so whenever i’d fall asleep on my back, i’d eventually hear this ringing in my ears (or it’d happen upon waking up), and then the sleep paralysis would begin. i only ‘saw’ stuff a couple times but the fear for me was really more about the overwhelming sensation of pure dread that always came along with it even when i was aware what was happening, and i Always got this feeling too that if i opened my eyes in that moment, something was gonna stab them.
so moving on to how that applies to the arg, the first few lines are about how, obviously, the island is not real, even in the lore being given its a figment of chris’ imagination, but you have to enter it anyways, and the only way to do that is to believe its real. then it tells you how to ‘enter’ that world, (btw i didn’t expect anyone to actually follow these instructions if found, but even if they did, the whole ‘sleep paralysis being caused by sleeping on your back’ thing usually only happens if you’re predisposed to having it and only happens to Some people who have it, so the intent was like. never to bring that upon anybody. but if you are prone to sleep paralysis plz do not attempt even as a joke or anything thx)
the parts about hallucinating chris then are as follows, “ask about the camp / he wont respond verbally” , meaning he will show you through a dream instead, one that might look a lot like the video from before. “on the third night you will see his eyes”, meaning you will see the island but not be able to interact with it, or basically, how we see total drama on tv right now. “on the fourth night you’ll enter (his eyes)” references the island existing ‘within his eyes’, meaning you will enter the actual island. the next night chris will sleep and you will be able to enter the island again and find him. the idea with the nail is that, if you destroy his eyes you destroy the ‘island’ within them. wrapping back around to sleep paralysis, the idea of stabbing yourself with the nail afterwards is because sometimes, the only thing you can move during sleep paralysis is your fingertips and toes, and wiggling those can help bring you out of the paralysis. so at first how i used to wake myself up, but it didnt usually work fast enough so oftentimes id just pinch the shit out of my fingers and use pain to make my muscles start up faster.
the next post is a link to a countdown. again, i knew nobody was rly following at this point, but i wanted a little more build up before just dropping the ending. it was set up to end 5 days after the last post, aka the one that mentioned a 5 night dream ritual.
puzzle 12. (x) going all the way back to the normal multi step translation puzzles. the coloring of the cipher is a bit different, and its missing chris, but its meant to be used the same as it was before, these changes are only for dramatic effect. and chris is gone because well. we mentally offed him in the inception dream land last time. so anyways the snake = 6, shift A to 6, take out the letters “R-I-C-K” of the characters laying in their graves, and you get this translation;
“its almost time. we must now crack open our minds like a crowbar to a sealed chest. like an egg to a pan. to find our way into camp wawanakwa our ego cannot remain intact, and to traverse it we must stay strong. to escape it, we must glue the pieces back together. now we sleep. dream. end the nightmare.”
this is a final message before ‘entering the island’ to kill chris and free the campers from the island. it acts like a pep talk.
the next post is just the countdown ending.
puzzle 13 (the finale). (x)
this post sends you to a new blog entirely, called @awakenfromthenightmare​. there is only one post on it. the post has another link to a mega file, and the link is attached onto a string of text. follow the link by clicking, then copy the text and paste it in as the decryption key. now you have another image to translate with the tangodeltaindia cipher;
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when translated, the text is another link to a youtube video. 
 www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
so there you have it, that video is the ending to the entire arg. it didnt really end the way i wanted at first, i got burnt out from no engagement about halfway through which isnt anybody elses fault, but i still felt this was a well crafted and fitting finale. thank you all for reading.
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judehayward · 4 years
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lady gaga voice slowly fadin in: ju-Das juda-ah-ah… this depressed goblin bastard is honestly my fav male muse like i dnt typically stick w male muses tht long i struggle bt................. i’ve played him the longest of them all n always seem to return to him. jst cnt stay away. way 2 attached to this absurd little man. it’s nai btw!!!! (josefine on the main). launches right in to jude’s intro without further adieu..... (u can also find his playlist here) 🧙‍🎨
「douglas booth & cis-male」⇾ hayward , jude, the senior radcliffe student’s records show that he is a pisces and 23 years old. he is studying ART, living in moris and can be protective, laidback, nonsensical & apathetic. when i see him i am reminded of wearing a faded smiley face sticker on your forehead while receiving a serious lecture, saying “fuck off” to inanimate objects, lead marbles instead of eyes. ⇽「nai & 23 & gmt & she/her.」
he pinterest:
me in the voice of a card magician performing on the street: round up round up pick a pinterest any pinterest!
ta-da it’s aesthetics:
lead marbles instead of eyes, a stolen hearse careening down the wrong lane, wearing a faded smiley face sticker on your forehead while receiving a serious lecture, bags under the eyes that are so big they could pack enough clothes for a three week vacation, a cigarette wobbling from your bottom lip as you squint against the sunlight, passing out on a stranger’s rooftop, placing sunglasses over the eyes of a biology lab skeleton, gangling around the place like shaggy minus his scooby snacks, saying “fuck off” to inanimate objects
about tha Bitch:
born in sheffield in england, bt they went back and forth between there n san fran a lot
jude was an unhappy accident. his parents never rly used protection bc they were super Liberal n Au Naturel n believed in the pull out method bc… they were maniacs. bt then the ONE time they used a condom in an effort to b safety conscious it broke n hence…. jude was born
they just kind of ran w it bc they had such a passionate relationship tht they were like What The Hell…. may as well! itll be fine we’ll learn to be good parents n love him like normal ppl do
spoiler alert: tht didn’t work out
they were ok to him like they weren’t fully Bad bt they just found him to be a massive burden n hindrance to their plans. pretty absent n irresponsible. they literally….. had sex all day every day n acted like a pair of teenagers. it ws a super weird environment for a kid to grow up in bc he literally had no role models or… guidance or…. anything rly. occasionally they’d joke around w him or pretend they properly knew what grade he was going into but for the most part they just Didn’t Care the way parents shd. they lost his birth certificate n dnt remember what they put as his middle name so he’s jst kind of like hmmmm............. n gives himself a diff one every time ppl ask. past variations hv included: jude pauly hayward, jude maureen hayward, jude van winkle hayward. says all of these w a very straight face
despite this he does hv some nice memories w them. usually he definitely sees them fr holidays. frm being rly young their christmas tradition hs been to get a bunch of chinese food like a Banquet Feast n spend all day smoking n drinking into the early hours. perhaps not the healthiest or most responsible bt 😔 jude rly likes it it’s kind of the one time of yr he feels he has a proper family
they r both suuuuper into the arts. rly good sculptors bt they paint too n they actually own a successful gallery in sheffield n san fran
(trauma tw) as a result he grew up around a lot of creative n sometimes pretentious ppl. the friends of his parents were more present in his life than his ACTUAL parents bc they were always jetting off to diff countries to scout out new pieces fr their galleries n just have a gd time in beautiful places without…. the annoyance tht ws being responsible n looking after someone. tbh some of his parents friends were rly damaging too bt….i won’t go into that just yet. it doesn’t rly…need properly explaining bc jude never talks abt it anyway n it….is rather triggering so i’ll jst….leav it for now tbh. basically they just were Not Nice n jude had a lot of bad memories he keeps repressed bt he also??? has some gd ones..... it was a strange environment bt he’s a survivor
(death n grief tw) he hd to do community service bc he kind of… hd a bit of a breakdown before the funeral of his elderly neighbour who bsically raised him bc her kids rly didnt care abt her they jst wanted her inheritance?? so he… stole the hearse w her casket still in it n ws jst like… drivin around the place sort of… tryin nt to cry…..KJJFHSFKJGHKFG i mean. it isnt funny its actually sad bt :/ in a very bizarre n jude way. he gt caught n taken in fr questioning bt her son kind of realised hw… broken up abt her death jude ws n had a heart n didnt press charges. regardless he stil hd to do community service bc it ws like taken seriously even tho it ws his first proper offence. doin it rly exhausted n depressed him so when he wsnt doin tht he ws just hibernatin in his room……. this ws like 4 months ago nw............ just some fun lore fr u all
bc of how he ws raised he has a p cultured taste. he luvs classic lit n p much anything artsy. he can play piano 2 n sometimes gets rly high n thinks he’s mozart level gd at composing he’s jst going fking wild on the keys in a trance...... i mean he’s gd bt… chill
he’s rly sarcastic n so deadpan like he’ll say smthn completely ridiculous bt he’ll say it w his whole chest so sincere.... it’s rly hard to tell when he’s joking or serious honestly. has an overflowing secret sketchbook n if he cares abt someone he’ll probably secretly draw them. does NOT share these drawings w the person he hates being openly sentimental. at heart he is jst a very Sad Boy w lots of repressed issues like depression genuinely just does NAT giv him a single break bt he plasters over this w wise cracks n never discusses his emotions ever. he’s actually p decent or at least tries to b. he’s kind of like tht bit in superbad where michael cera gets rly drunk n makes a toast to women like tht energy...........
he has rly bad insomnia so he like never sleeps idk how he’s Alive straight up. please go to bed sir............. he always has rly sleepy eyes n rubs them tiredly mid conversation. he smokes a lot of weed to try n compensate fr this n make him tired bt he still struggles a lot
ANYWAY that aside he’s at radcliffe doing art, focusing on fine art like painting is............... the thing he luvs most...... his style is kind of.......... taking normal things n painting w surreal colours.... he likes A LOT of colour in his paintings which is kind of a stark contrast to his personality bc his world’s so.... washed out n grey............ lovs art n philosophy n literature n photography n music.... 
ummMMMMmm honestly idk i’m blankin on what else to say. ull find him smoking weed reading an american classic or gnawing at his thumbnail n getting charcoal smudges on all his clothes. wandering the streets in plaid pj bottoms n dr martens eating frm a cereal box without care in the world. he’s p broody n scruffy n he’s mostly here fr a laidback time....... doesn’t rly like when ppl take themselves too seriously........ likes strange ppl thinks the world is mde richer by them n likes when ppl can jst bounce back jokes at him without being like erm. u dont make sense mate. bc frankly he can come up w some strange stuff sometimes.............. talking to him cn b like navigating a dark n bendy road without a flashlight....... 
(drugs tw) once did shrooms n woke up naked in the woods curled up in a pile of leaves. to this day he recounts this as his werewolf transformation. hs no idea hw he ended up there n when ppl r like are u not. concerned jude. tht is so strange? he jst shrugs like.............. dunno....................... suppose i’m jst a werewolf upon occasion. so casual abt it. jst truly does Not care abt most things at all..... almost to the point tht it’s concerning (sometimes way past the point tht it’s concerning too :/)
this is the desc on an aesthetic i mde of his style once n sums it up well!! ‘additionally: too many pairs of trousers, a hideous amount of white t-shirts all somewhat stained with charcoal, a jumper so thinly knit it almost looks sheer, chipped teale nail varnish, a cream corduroy jacket with a cigarette hole singed onto the cuff, vintage wiry reading glasses he almost never wears, a freshly rolled cigarette behind his ear, a thrifted t-shirt with a warped bart simpson wearing a stethoscope with the caption ‘bard knwos cardiology’ and two crops hacked that way with kitchen scissors that he sometimes wears to paint.‘
EXPERT at rolling spliffs like jst. mkes them so precise n neat....... it’s his super power. his fav thing to smoke frm is banana flavour papers.................... linking 2 this he’s like. bad w emotions bt he does try..... once his friend (maggie) ws sad so he brought her a spliff wrapped in grape flavoured paper bc it’s her fav fruit n jst like. wordlessly gave it to her. it’s the thought tht counts.....
PLOTS!!!!!
plays bass in a band which cld b a fun connection to get together??? i picture the music being like surf rock type like........... mac demarco...... bt he also luvs elliott smith n glass animals n the cure n metronomy n neutral milk hotel n talking heads n radiohead n mazzy star n wolf alice...................... idk jst like.... within tht ballpark i suppose i imagine it being................
mayb ppl he shares classes w?????? i’d like someone tht does a similar course n they hang out tgether when it comes to trips fr the module to museums or exhibits or wtever................ they both stand in front of paintings analysing it rly wrong n saying stuff like hmmmmmmmmm....... i do declare i see a, uh..... large phallus protruding from the centre of this image...... moves something in me.......... n some elderly person looking at it besides them is like Ergh. sickened n disgraced. leaves w a brow severely furrowed
someone he smokes w on the moris rooftop late at night when he cnt sleep??? mayb they’re up n cnt sleep either fr whtever reason n it’s become an unspoken kind of ritual where they always clamber out n find each other there n jst wordlessly keep them company
jude is kind of like. protective almost to a fault sometimes........... mayb some guy he’s punched......................... if they hurt someone he cares abt........... typically it wld hv been a girl he ws kind of like. affected by his first relationship bc she had a bad home situation n ever since jst wnts..... to Protect it’s kind of like an automatic instinct ingrained in him nw 😔 all sounds very noble n well bt sometimes it cn b a bit of an escalation i wnt lie
perhaps a few hook-ups??? jude doesn’t tend to sleep w ppl he rly knows bc he just..... likes it to b an impersonal thing doesn’t like getting attached fr various reasons so mayb they only kno each other via this OR mayb he bent his rules a bit..... cld either work seamlessly or hv added drama if one side hs mre feelings or whtever
currently living in moris w 2 roommates bt i’d love some neighbours perhaps..... mayb someone tht lives directly nxt door to his room n is like ://// bc he plays music loud n weeds always drifting frm his window n mking their room smell if theirs is open too................. or mayb they get on..... mayb there’s a rly mean seagull tht lands on a branch n poos on pedestrians n they both commentate on it frm their windows like david attenborough...... they’re like he’s at it again. they’ve named him n everything
HONESTLY anything if u have an idea hmu i’d love 2 hear it.......... rubs my hands tgether in excitement to plot up a storm w u all
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ridiculousravenclaw · 4 years
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The life of Elara Ware - chapter 3
So, funny story. I accidentally shut myself out of this account when I forgot my damn password. Then there was this pandemic and being technically a key worker, that was stress. Then I just started writing other stuff. So yeah, I kinda left this behind, which was a shame because I had a lot planned for it. But anyway here's chapter 3 as I wrote it ages ago and who knows, maybe I'll keep going. FYI I could not be bothered to go back and check it so theres almost definitely a spelling mistake or some grammatical errors. Sorry about it.
The next few days at The Burrow passed far too quickly for Elaras liking. It could be hectic at times with so many of them in one house. A fact Mrs Weasley continuously apologised for. But Elara, so used to being alone, loved the business of life at the Weasleys. She had missed George more than she thought she could. They relished in the time they spent together and, when they were sure no one was around to see, stole as many kisses as they could. With so many of them in the house though the later was practically impossible and more than once their embrace had been broken up my someone walking suddenly into the room. Ron couldn't look Elara in the eye for days after he walked in to find a particularly passionate scene. In fairness it was actually his room.
The fullness of the house had at least meant that they could stage 4 a side quidditch matches in the garden with the Weasleys and Harry. Hermione preferred to watch. When they weren't doing that Elara found she enjoyed chatting with Ginny, who to Elaras great surprise was not as girly or shy as she thought she was. Or talking with the eldest 2 Weasley boys; neither of whom she'd met before and had a number of interesting tales about the twins growing up. Then there was Harry, Ron and Hermione. They were a bit of an unlikely trio and Elara was convinced Ron fancied Hermione, but nether the less they were obviously good friends and Elara enjoyed spending time with them. Especially Harry. She'd always really liked Harry Potter, he didn't want the pitty the world gave him, he just wanted a normal life. Elara found she really respected that. The only person in the house Elara found she clashed with was Percy. Though she got the impression that it wasn't just her he had that affect on. For lack of a better word, Percy was a bit of a snob. Thankfully she rarely saw him as he spent most days at work and often chose to stay late most nights.
It was the last day of the holidays and they were all sat in the living room except for Mr Weasley who still wasn't back from work. Elara had parked herself on the furthest seat from her boyfriend and his twin. There was 2 reasons for this. First it meant she didnt have to resist the temptation of his soft lips whilst everyone was here to see. Secondly it made it far easier to feign ignorance to what the pair were currently doing. As they sat huddled together, talking in hushed whispers. She wasnt entirely sure what they were up to but it was almost certainly to do with Weasleys Wizard Wheezes, something Mrs Weasley highly disapproved of. As she sat alone she found her mind wondering and without meaning to found herself going over the dream she'd had the night before. She couldn't explain why but it had been bothering her all day. It wasn't a scary dream or in anyway disturbing. But Elara found herself shaken up by it none the less. Especially as she was almost certain she'd had that exact dream before.
In the dream Elara was walking through the woods at night. The only respite from the dark provided by the moon as its faint light battled through the thick branche above. She's looking for something but what it is or where she should look remains a mystery. Still she keeps going. Undeterred as the trees and undergrowth becomes denser and more wild. Then all of a sudden she sees a shape moving through the shadows. It slides slowly through the trees towards her until it stops in a clearing ahead. Bathing in the moonlight is a great white fox. Larger than any fox had the right to be and more majestic than any she'd seen. Its pure white coat shining brightly as though lighting up from within. Elara feels a pang of familiarity deep in her heart as she looks into its eyes. She doesn't run or scream. She knows she's safe. The white fox is here to help her, like a mother looking out for her cub. Its gaze is mesmerising and Elara could read the message in its eyes. 'follow me. I'll show you where it is'
"hey! daydreamer! wake up!" Elara was suddenly pulled out of her thoughts to find the whole room staring at her. She shakes herself mentally, uncomfortable by the sudden attention on her.
"sorry" she said trying to laugh it off dismissively "miles away"
"whatcha thin huh in abou?" asked Ron mid yawn. Elara sighed
"that out of all Georges siblings I like you the least" she said dryly
"really?"
"no" she says with a smile, earning a few laughs. Ron a few seconds behind the others before he got the joke.
Suddenly his face changed
"woah!" he said, staring at Elara in amazement.
"what?" Elara said. she suddenly felt a bit self conscious.
"your eyes are different colours!"
"oh" She giggled breathing a sigh of relief. "you've just noticed? really? how long have I known you?"
Everyone was laughing again
"what. have they always been like that?"
"yes!" everyone else said in chorus.
"Since I was a baby Ron. what did you think I did it deliberately? I got bored one day and coloured one in with a sharpie?"
Ron made a face somewhere between confusion and embarrassment.
"what's a sharpie?" Ah, Elara thought. muggle reference, complete miss.
" Well we all know ickle Ronnie kins is a complete idiot at the best of times. "Said George as he crossed the room and squeezed on the armchair next to Elara before pulling her onto his lap.
"what is a sharpie?" he added to her at a whisper. Elara smiled and shook her head dismissively. The rest of the room going back to their individual conversations.
"muggle stuff" she answered
"Ah. well then whatever you do, dont mention it in front of dad. he'll get all excited and interrogate you again." George said as he started rubbing small circles onto her hip with his thumb. Elara couldn't help but smile at the gesture.
"oh stop it hes not that bad. " She said rolling her eyes.
"yes he is, remember when you mentioned the cinema?" Elara laughed. She did remember that. It had taken her the best part of an hour to explain the concept to Mr Weasley.
"Anyway. Don't be so mean to your brother, as I recall it took you months to bloody notice." George looked blank for a moment.
"notice what?" he asked
"my eyes!"
"oh" he remarked, realisation dawning.
"it wasnt months was it? maybe a few weeks" Elara was giggling now, enjoying the slight embarrassment creeping into George's cheeks.
"nope definitely months. it was around Christmas time. remember? you thought I'd done it with magic to be all christmassy. Though how that's a christmassy thing to do I dont know."
"oh. yeah. well... that's only cause I'm not a weird person who stares at pretty girls eyes" George said, mockingly batting his eyelids at her. Elara grinned fondly at him, then leaned forward and left a light peck on his lips.
"Yeah you are."
"a couple of months is good for him" Fred said " George didn't realise we were identical until we were 7" Elara started slightly having not realised Fred had come over. He was sat on the floor next Charlie looking amused.
"in fairness that's not so obvious as I have always been way better looking than you." George retorted quickly.
Both twins sniggered and Elara noted that even their laughter was the same.
"did we mention he's delusional? sure you want him El?" Fred said
"Oh someone sounds jealous to me. Don't worry Fred I'm sure we can find a girl to take pity and go out with you"
Elara could tell this verbal tennis wasn't going to stop anytime soon.
" *cough* testosterone *cough* "
"oh look your fathers coming" Mrs Weasley suddenly announced getting everyones attention. Sure enough the hand on the grand father clock which bore mr Weasleys likeness had moved and now pointed at travelling. Then it moved once more settleing with the other hands on home. At the same time the door opened and Mr Weasleys voice could be heard from the kitchen. Mrs Weasley scuttled out to greet him. With the others distracted by this Elara inexplicably found her mind once again wondering back to her dream and the White Fox. Its magnetic familiar eyes drawing her in.
"you okay?" George said quietly. Wrapping his arms around Elara protectively and pulling her back to the present.
"yeah of course" She said trying to sound as casual as possible. George wasnt convinced. He knew her far too well and having shared it with him that morning knew what she was thinking about.
"It was just a dream you know El. I know it was a bit freaky. But it cant hurt you" he said, squeezing her arm reassuringly. That's just the thing, she thought, it wasn't scary to me. But she smiled at him appreciatively.
"I know"
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softlunars · 5 years
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unholy.
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60 things ; things you said that i wish you hadn’t & things you said with clenched fists. — bang chan ; stray kids
demon au! —fallen angel!chan x demon!reader
requested: [yes!]
(a/n): “nunc ostende te” is latin for “now show yourself.” i didnt,,, wanna look up an actual demon summon cause i’m a whole ass scaredy cat so that’s the most i did sjzknaksmz
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technically, chan shouldn’t be doing this. he shouldn’t be drawing a pentagram on his apartment floor. he shouldn’t be opening a summoning book. and he definitely shouldn’t be flipping to the demons section of said book.
this would’ve all applied to him if he still had wings on his back. but he didn’t — they were clipped off months ago, and chan was sent to tumble down to the earth, forced to make his own path from then on. did it bother him? well, maybe if he thought about it enough, it would. he doesn’t allow himself to drift off to the past, though; things are left in the past for a reason, and sometimes, they’re better off there — to be forgotten.
chan thumbed through the demons section, his eyes flitting across the hundreds of pages until he found what he was looking for.
how to summon a demon.
he scanned the page, looking for the ceremony that had to take place. he skipped over the descriptions of demons — different types, kinds of powers, different demon specialities. chan wasn’t interested in all that; he just wanted to summon a demon. did he have any reason? no, not really. maybe he wanted to spite God further or something, he didn’t know.
the book, which was filled with descriptions of supernatural beings and different summons, materialized in front of him in the early dawn. the ancient literature acted as if it were a magnet, reeling in chan’s interest until he finally picked it up. which is how he found himself in the middle of a pentagram.
he set the book down, outside of the pentagram’s reach. a nervous huff of air left him. why the hell was he doing this? he didn’t want to come face to face with a soul-eating creature from the depths of hell, and he certainly didn’t want to be ripped to shreds before his soul followed suit.
chan continued anyways. he’s already finished the preliminary setup — there was no legitimate reason to stop now.
he took a deep breath in a futile effort to relieve his nerves. was chan stupid? going through with this, yes, he most likely was. did he lose his mind? most definitely.
chan took a quick glance at the sentences he needed to utter. he had to get them right; if he didn’t, he might as well sell his soul to the actual devil.
he began the chant, albeit very shakily. chan was certain he was going to die tonight. his few months spent on earth were going to abruptly end as soon as he finished.
“nunc ostende te.” as he uttered the final sentence, chan snapped his eyes open. if he were going to die right now, he might as well look his killer in the eyes.
the dim flicker of the candles’ flames were the only things he could see. nothing moved, nothing changed, not even the air felt different — something chan thought to be the first aspect to dramatically shift after chanting a summon this dark.
he breathed a sigh of relief. thank the heavens that didn’t work.
the candles were extinguished. the air became bitingly cold. and suddenly, chan feared for his life.
“i don’t know who’s coming out but you don’t have to show yourself — i’d be more than happy to just go to sleep.” he spoke into the still air, trying to convince whatever spirit entered his apartment to leave him the hell alone.
“you summoned me, man. it’s your fault you asked for a demon.” a dark voice bounced off his living room walls. as it stopped speaking, a body materialized at the edge of the pentagram. well, chan thought, it was a nice couple months.
the gaze that met his eyes was apathetic, empty and almost… entertainingly bored. there were no visible horns, no bats’ wings or pointy tail chan could make out. if he didn’t know any better, he’d assume the person in front of him was just a mortal.
you spoke again, this time with an amused edge decorating your speech. “i don’t take fallen angels’ souls, if that’s why your mind’s traveling twenty trillion miles an hour. i don’t even collect souls in general, dude. i just fuck with people.”
“how did you know i’m a fallen angel?” chan’s eyes glinted with a curious apprehension; he knew demons could read minds — angels were granted that ability, as well — but he didn’t know they could differentiate immortal beings from mortal ones. this was something angels weren’t granted the gift to do. unless they made themselves known to each other, angels weren’t able to tell supernatural from human.
“you got a funny aura ‘round you. i usually only see that with fallen angels or whatever. but what’s a former God’s kiss-ass doing in the middle of a pentagram?” you raised an eyebrow conspicuously. the few times you were summoned before, you’d only been greeted by a handful of fallen angels. their reasoning for summoning such a dark creature was simple — they were bored and wanted to tell their former ruler to “fuck off.”
chan shrugged his shoulders at your question. he didn’t have a response; he didn’t even know why he did it himself. your head rolled back on your shoulders as a sharp laugh echoed throughout the room.
“your thoughts are fucking hilarious, just thought i should tell ya.” your comment made a blush furiously form on chan’s face. maybe this was a really shitty idea.
“listen, fallen angel, i gotta make other rounds, so i’m gonna strike a deal with ya.” you watched as your summoner’s eyebrows rose, prompting you to continue.
“i ain’t gonna do some typical demon shit, alright? but i wanna mark ya — it isn’t a bad thing, man, calm down!” you really were entertained by this. what a hell of a fun time this was making itself out to be!
chan’s eyes squinted as he stared you down. he had his apprehensions, of course — he didn’t know what the hell a mark was; he was never taught that! what if this was a way for you to siphon his soul from him, bit by bit, until you drained it from his body entirely?
“it’s just so i’m the only demon that’s allowed near ya. no one else can come anywhere close to you with this. so, while you’re protected from other nasty lil’ shits, you got your own lil’ shit that can annoy you until the end of the universe.” you observed the former angel’s face, gauging his reaction to your offer. you were pleasantly surprised when he nodded his head.
“fine. mark me.”
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after you marked the fallen angel, you found yourself constantly appearing at his side. he would almost jump out of his skin every time, which always provided you with an intense laughing session.
you learned quite a bit about chan. you were informed about the difficult schooling he was put through as a child; he’d reveal small bits and pieces about his life in the clouds, like how one time he almost made a fellow angel kick his ass past recognition.
“i was a really shitty angel, now that i think about it.” chan laughed out once, on one of the times you accompanied him at nightfall. “maybe you shoulda been born a demon.” you had joked that night, but chan took it harsher than you intended. the shift in his emotions was evident, as he turned colder toward you until you left him alone for the following week.
you chose your words more carefully after that night. sure, you were a demon — a supernatural entity born for the sole purpose of evil. but being a creature formed from pure hatred didn’t hinder the conscience you owned, regardless of how small it was.
your efforts weren’t always fruitful. tonight was one of those times.
chan had turned colder than ice just moments before, a comment you made angering him once more. the fallen angel became mute, barely even acknowledging you were still in his apartment. it hurt your feelings — pissed you off more than anything. you never intended to attack him with your choice of words. but, regardless of how cautious you were, so many things seemed to set chan off.
“chan, i dunno what your whole… issue or whatever is, but you ain’t gotta be a dick to me ‘cause of it.” you felt the boiling pit in your stomach grow as chan turned to face you. if looks could kill, both of you would have been reduced to dust.
“my problem, (y/n), is your heartless comments about how i ‘should’ve been born in hell.’ i was born an angel for a reason, just like you were born a demon for a reason.” his voice sliced through the air, making the fire in your stomach pour out. if chan wanted to see why you were a demon, oh, was he going to see why.
“okay, kid. your wings were torn off your back for a reason, and you wanna know why? ‘cause you fucking failed at being an angel! you couldn’t appease God, you couldn’t reach the standards he set. you. fucked. up.” your aura darkened as you continued spitting words at chan. flames seemed to form around your body as your fury fueled you.
“which means, angel boy, that you weren’t cut out to stay behind those damn pearly gates! you weren’t a good fit. you weren’t meant to stay at God’s ‘holy fucking side.’”
chan’s gaze filled with hatred and indignation as your jabs reached his ears. how dare you say that to him? how dare you act as if you know anything about heaven, about God?
his fists clenched and unclenched by his side as he listened to your tyraid. finally, chan snapped after your last insult hung in the air.
“you might as well have been banished to hell, ‘cause at least you woulda been surrounded by people who fucked up just as bad as you did, and people who were just as shitty as you.”
“stop acting as if you know anything about heaven. you’re a lowlife demon, for fucks sake!” his words felt hotter than the flames that licked at your skin down in hell.
“you’re the scum of the supernatural world. you hold no good in your heart, no light in your soul — nothing!” you watched as the glint in his eye grew into a ball of fire, aimed to hit you and reduce you to nothing.
“God wanted me at one point, which is the difference between you and i. someone wanted me, no one ever wanted you.”
chan’s words slammed into your brain. these thoughts — they weren’t new to you. you were well aware that no one wants a demon around. no one would ever want a demon around.
you could easily push those facts to the side if you or a fellow demon voiced them. but hearing them from chan, a former angel, someone God handpicked to serve him, lit you up.
“you’re just as terrible as us demons. you have no fucking soul, bang chan.”
“you deserve to rot in hell, just like the rest of us.”
with that, you disappeared from chan’s apartment. the fallen angel never saw you again.
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cybernightwanderer · 4 years
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“ My Reiki and Yoga New Free Soul Brother - Once an abuser manipulative thieve , money driven leach “
Well thats a big tittle to describe one person entirely. So my ( midle ) brother across my kid years and then teenager developing to adult, my brother was an interesting person. For example, in school my brother would pretend he didnt know me , and if i even dared to aproach him he would shame me in front of everyone, even thought they already knew i was his sister, i was bullied a lot in school so at the start i tried a few times reaching out to him , specially because i didnt have any friends and id always be alone. This motherfucker who was already a teenager completly dismissed me , BUT would actually seek me out or talk to me when he needed lunch money because he already “ spent his”, funny enough hed get mine to eat coz he didnt wanna use his, and if i didnt gave him even though i hadnt eaten , he would guilty me badly , and being the kid that i was , my brother was everything to me , even tho he didnt gave a shit about me.
So in consequence i started drawing a distance line between me and him, at home id start to distance myself and ignore him. And he started getting like a really attention whore, hed always annoye me , and force me to hangout, and i didnt he would threaten me or do some shit at the house and blame me for it , because my mother at the tinniest shit at home would beat the crap out of me , so me being the little kid that i was tired of getting beatings for no random reason , id play along. My brother would literally antagonzie me and scare the shit out of me while so. Everytime my family went anywhere , for example the beach, id try to go to the water alone for some peace this motherfucker would sneak behind me and try to drown me as a joke , like every 5 minutes, id yell in panic and my mom wouldnt do shit, eventually id end up actually chocking on water and  hit my head on the sand and cry the rest of the time. So yeah FUN ! Did my mom do anything ? ofc no , “ hes just playing around “. I had BD collections that id buy with my lunch money that sometimes id save up, disney movie cassettes and so on. Sometimes id have snacks in my room to eat when studying or something. My brother, being a full grown ass teenager that he was , would steal everything without me even catching a glimpse of it. My brother would “ borrow “ things without asking then hide them because he wanted. I had two final fantasy collectible caracters that i spent my leftover bday money on, and my brother would take it as his own. Yes because whatever birthday money i got wether it be 50 euros or even 20 from my grandma or aunt, my mom would take it “ borrowed” for herself with no justification, shed always say “ Ah lend me i need it  / or / I always buy you clothes and everythings, i buy you food , you owe me this , thats the minimum you could do / “ or / she would just take it without me knowing , she would inspect my bday gifts and take it before hand , the problem is that my grandma or aunt would always after if i was gonna save it up and id ask what and they would question what i did with the money and i would ask what money and blah blah , you get where this is going.
OH and if i didnt give my money the money she would beat me up ! wich is funny asf. My brother literally sold all my things behind my back, my original BDS, MY FUCKING POISON IVY STORYLINE BD, my disney cassetes , my collectibles, and my snacks he would steal and eat. If i had saved up money hidden, first he would try to borrow it and guilty me with the “ im such a good brother to you , you cant even lend me money ? i will pay you back, trust me “ ... ofc he never payed me back , but every two weeks he woul do this shit. And if i by any chance didnt gave him , hed just steal, or sell my things, wich regardless of me lending him , he would do it anyway. Fast forward to my early teenage years, i had to start working , i quit school because we entered that internet deth with my moms company, wich my brother also contributed to but let the blame to me ofc, i was already the punch bag of the family what is one more thing. My brothers were always my moms “ babies “ even tho one was already a full grown ass man and the other was already on his way. My brother did nothing at home , didnt take the dog outside, didnt take out the trash, didnt make food, didnt wash the dishes, didnt clean the house, basicly sit on his ass all day playing video games and eating, and selling my shit for money. My brother was unemployed for 3/4 years in between those i studied and worked at the same time , and did all the house chores, even if i had to walk the dog as 2/3 am after work i would have to, even tho my brother was in bed all day. My mom would literally yell at me and make my life a living hell and threaten to hit me if i didnt do it or even dared to complain. I would get home trying to study , trying to recorver at school ,and she would yell non stop until i didn every house chore, wich i would only manage to finish at midnight or later, and then id be too tired and unmotivated to do anything so id just sleep, and id always get late to class thanks to that. When my brothers started working, it was at my dads wearehouse, where i was forced to work too. Id work 8 to 10 hours , sometimes more, because we got payed by publicity stock packs, each pack was worth 1 euro, wich also 1 pack took 1 hour and 15/20 minutes to make. So if i wanted to make the day worth anything i had to rush , no eating breaks or pee breakes. My hands at the end of the day would literally be filled with newspaper and printed paper ink and dirk, and tons of cuts and sores , that would be leeched in paper ink, wich make it hurt even more at the end of the day, and was really hard to take it out. My brother would take breaks every 30 minutes to smoke , be on his phone or even go to bathroom or eat randomly, i wouldnt stop the 8 hours straight, and when i actually had to go to the bathroom or eat something because id get sick, my brother literally stole packs from me, or try to “ negociate my help for X “, the thing about my brother is that hed always try to negociate something , ofc it was always entangled for his own benefit and not both.
So it was like this my brother came up to me all excited and say “ oh if you do this to help me , ill split the profit that way we will make more and will be less exausting “ stupid like i was id always give in, specially because if i didnt  hed steal anyway.... Hed always change his methods and works, and guilty me if i didnt do it, so id always have to do so. If i didnt hed just change the pack registration list either way, without me even seeing it, and fake my signature, i only found out we had to sign an official paper a few months later when my dad asked, before that my brother would always tell me to note them on my phone then send the numbers by the end of the week, and since he was the bosses son , every one backed up that story ofc.  Eventually when i started to get older , i cut ties with my brothers and dad. And my ( midle ) brother was constantly trying to reach out and play nice and shit , also he was still working at the wearhouse . Anyway , fast forward when i got unemployed after the 5 star hotel due to rape attent and shit like that, i was unemplyoyed for 4 moths?! My brother tried to reach out , and even came home before my mother to try and persuade me to enter one of his schemes, i explained to my brother that i didnt have any money and that i wouldnt believe anymore of his stupid schemes and blah blah. He swore he was only trying to make up to me , and the plan was , i would pretend to work at my dads  wearehouse, but i would just be there 2 times a week and he would give me a cut of the protfit, coz if he didnt want my dad to hire some random slow guy, so he set up to do a two persons work, and give me 30 % of the monthy rate and all i had to do is show up a few times for my dad to see i was there, and then go home. That motherfucker insisted for 3 days straight promissing it wasnt a scheme and that he was serious this time. OBVIOUSLY THAT DIDNT HAPPEN OBVIOUSLY- with the last 10 euros i had, i bought train tickers to the wearhouse, the first week he actually stick to his word, a few days later the shit started, he actualy forced me to deliver shit and stuff. Wich for me was really difficult because its when i started to develop hernias, and the pain was too overwhealming, and that fucker didnt care and still forced me to, eventually i told him i was out , and found out he still used my name in his shit plan  and pretended i was still working there to my dad for two whole months , and then begged me to lie to my dad on the phone, hed literally call me before my dad trying to get me to lie, and promissing the money, and hed ask my mom to pressure my to help him. What could i do??!! what happend after you may ask? did my brother gave me the money? OFC NO ! NO! He gave me 115 euros of the cut , and he made 996 euros to himself. And told me it was only for the days “ i actually worked “  NEVER IN MY LIFE  I VERBALLY EVER SAID TO ANYONE , FAMILY OR NOT  “ I hope you die, you are shit , you are nothing to me , seriously i hope you die “ and acually meant it and wished it. For the first time in my life i actually wished so hard for my brother to just die. I was done, i was officialy done , i had never been so done with someone. I was officialy done with my family. I blocked my dad on everything, i told my dad to fuck off. I told my older brother to fuck off. I told my middle brother to go die. And the last person was my dying grandma who was a snob ass piece of shit who only gave a shit about me when i was a little girl ( because its only cute when they r kids  ), to stop trying to call me and told her to just go and die. She literally sent me a voice message of 5 minutes crying beggin me to see her, and i just told her to go and die, its not because she is dying that is gonna erase the fact that she didnt gave a shit about me after i actually grown. And the fact that i did this apparently scared the shit out my dad and brothes, specially because i did it so naturally. AND TO THIS DAY I DONT REGRET WHAT I SAID AND I STILL DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT HER. OH AND PLOT TWIST SHES NOT DEAD NOR WAS SHE DYING, LAST YEAR SHE TRIED TO SCHEME MONEY OUT OF MY MOM, AND BEFORE THAT SHE WOULD ALWAYS TREAT MY MOM LIKE SHIT AN CALL HER NAMES, FUNNY ! Now they try to sneak into my life really AGAIN ... ffs Since the end of last year, apparently my brother turned into reiki and yoga and shit and is now driving a motivational fuck page for people who wanna “ grow spiritually and open the third eye “ and is trying to reconnect with me again, obviously i cut him off before he could even talk to me. So he spent 3 months or so , coming here and trying, and since he didnt get anything since january and february hes trying to manipulate me behind my mother, my mother is venting to my brother about me being closed off to them , and my brother is DIAGNOSING ME AS A PROBLEM, BECAUSE HE IS SO WISE AND ENLIGHTED... WTF??? diagnosing me??? ur not a fucking therapist you asshole ! The other day i heard him tell my mother in the living room , that “ SHE CANT LIVE LIKE THIS ITS VERY TOXIC FOR HER, SHE HAS TO TALK TO YOU AND BE A BETTER SISTER AND DAUGHTER SHE NEEDS TO BLAH BLAH YOU NEED TO KICK HER OUT IF SHE IS LIVING OFF YOU  “ WHAT THE FUCK?? im living off my mother?? the woman that forced me to give her more than half of my paycheck, thats doesnt give me privacy or respect and that literally threatned me if i ever tried to leave that she would chase me down???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OR SEND ME TO A MENTAL HOSPITAL????!!!! ... My older brother is doing the same, keeps trying to get me to go visit his kid, and to meet his kid, keeps trying to get my mother to see pictures of the kid or to call them. They keep trying to guilty me “ oh you cant take it out on the kid, its not the kids fault , he needs to know his aunt, you are his family “ BITCH FAMILY?????? FAMILY??? family doesnt mean shit. Yesterday even sent photos of his kid trought a new number LOL. I actually did went to the kids birthday, first time a few months ago, and guess what , my brother still the NO ONE ASKED- OPINIONATED asshole he was about my whole life, he literally takes one glimpse of me and judges my whole life and starts yelling shit at me ...ofc thats not gonna happend again. People dont change. People. dont. change. PEOPLE DONT CHANGE ! BITCH ?? WHAT? WHO THE FCK?? HOW THE FUCK??? In conclusion my brother is still the same piece of shit he was , and now even more narcisistic, and manipulative, he cant get what he wants from me , so now hes resourting to my mother again. I NEED TO LEAVE THIS HOUSE, I NEED TO LEAVE THIS FAMILY OMFG. Funny enough he does this shit then tries to get me to go to his house to celebrate his birthday because he “ MISSES ME AND THE OLD DAYS” ???? OLD DAYS OF YOU MENTALY ABUSING ME ? NOT TO MENTION THAT YOU ALMOST BROKE MY ARM BECAUSE I WOULDNT LEND YOU MY COMPUTER 3 YEARS AGO????? my mom literally told him we were gonna go there without even asking me if i wanted or even if i was gonna go. LOL, shes trying to emotionally manipulate me with older pictures of me and him , and games we would play together LOL. OMFG PLEASE SOME ONE, I DONT EVEN KNOW I NEED TO DIE OMFG... I CANT TAKE THIS FAMILY ANYMORE.
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irwintry · 5 years
Text
What Happens in Paris
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Warnings: swearing, alcohol
Author’s Note: STAYs in paris!!!!!!!!!!!! anyway sorry i’m so Bad at writing anything good
also request for part two k bc i have ideas but like, i didnt want this to be so long
Word Count: 5k
part two
“It’s like, ten bucks, mate.”
Luke snorted. “For a fuckin’ scam, yeah.”
“Ya aren’t curious?”
“Y’know me,” he said. “I have a pair of five-hundred-dollar shoes in my closet that I’ve never worn. If I was curious, I’d be sittin’ in there with my head in my hands like an eager kid. Not doin’ it.”
Calum rolled his eyes. “Don’t you wanna know if you and that chic are gonna get back together? Just ten bucks.”
Luke sighed and glanced over at the pink neon “Psychic” sign that illuminated the stairs before them. The night had been rough–– breaking up and binge drinking followed by a muzzy stroll in back neighborhoods he had never visited before. The vibrant letters swirled and eddied around, and before Luke could catch himself, he began walking down the steps.
Calum let out a laugh. “All right, here we fuckin’ go.”
There was an overwhelming musty scent that filled Luke’s nostrils as stepped into the small apartment. He imagined it hardly smelled of anything at all, but his imagination was so strong, and the toxins in his blood were too intense. The couches and chairs were covered in large silk sheets and tapestries, and soft jazz music was playing from an Anker speak on the coffee table.
“Celebrities,” a low female voice said from a kitchen. She stepped out, tea kettle in hand and a smirk on her face. “That’s not a first.”
She was younger than what Luke expected, but a few laugh lines decorated the corners by her eyes. However, she spoke like a middle-aged smoker from Brooklyn. Her hair was in thick, red curls, and he imagined the difficulty of taming it–– he had trouble taming his own curls on the occasion.
“Take a seat,” she said, setting down the kettle on a doily in the center of a table. “You need it.”
Luke was unsure of the woman, but Calum was more eager to have his life spelled out for him. He nearly kicked the chair out from under him as he sat on the wicker beside a big, dusty fern.
“Tea?”
“Yes––
“No,” said Luke, his eyes narrowing in on his friend next to him.
The woman chuckled and began pouring hot water into two teacups. “Earl gray for you,” she said to Calum, and then she looked at Luke. “And rose for you.”
There was a knot forming in the pit of his stomach, and it grew larger as the teacup slid in his direction. The woman, who Luke would later know as Gina, sat across from the two of them and smiled. She spoke with her hands, and he found himself focusing in on the fluidity of the motions.
“I like the energy in this room,” she said. “It’s–– it’s light and positive. But there are some... interruptions. Like the positive is interacting with a negative, and it’s creating this ugly––aaughh––amalgamation.” Her eyes fell to Luke. “You. You haven’t been a good person.”
“What?” he asked, his voice reaching a high register while his friend laughed beside him.
The woman grinned. He didn’t like her grin. “Don’t act so surprised. Y-you have good qualities, eh, y’know? You love people and you always have. But you feel a lot of power. And, look at ya, honey. Money is a big part of that. You live in a constant cycle of excitement and stress, and the people that come and go in your life are greatly affected by you. But ya haven’t been good to them!”
“This is fuckin’ bullshit,” said Luke as he stood. “I don’t need this.”
“And you’re sad!”
“What?”
“But you’re too sad to realize you’re sad,” she continued. “There is a person in your life who is conflictin’ you. I’m sensing that they don’t mean much to you righ’ now, but the more you are around them, the more you will question who you are. Drink your fuckin’ tea.”
Luke huffed and returned to his seat. “What the fuck is happening,” he muttered, but it wasn’t a question. Calum was still stifling a laugh.
“They don’t like you right now,” the woman continued. “It is radiating off of you like fuckin’ UV rays, honey. They will mess with your feelings as you struggle to figure out your own. And–– “
“What is this shit?” Luke asked. “Like, what are you even telling me? Why is this person important to me?”
The woman chuckled darkly. “You’re going to fall in love with them, honey.”
-
“Who the fuck invited you?”
“I the fuck invited me,” you replied, hands folded across your chest as you brushed by the tall blond. “I’m here to see Cal, ya dipshit. I’m getting his house key.”
Luke let out a huff and pushed the front door shut behind him. The night before tour was a night full of traditions, and nearly all of his close friends participated in the so-called rituals. You, however, were not his friend. You were Ashton and Michael’s, and especially Calum’s, but you were not, under any circumstance, Luke’s friend. So, of all nights for you to drop by unexpectedly, it had to be the night of pre-tour traditions.
“Still didn’t fucking invite you,” he called after you, but you had already made your way into the kitchen where the group gathered. “Jesus fuckin’–– “
A loud chorus of “aye”’s and “hey”’s filled the room as you entered. He ambled in after you, his shoulders tight while he watched you go around and hug the people he was closest to. They all loved you, he knew that. And, he hated that.
“Ya didn’t tell me you invited Y/N,” said Ashton. He nudged his friend teasingly before adding in a wink. “When d’ya get the hots for her?”
Luke glared at him. “I’d run onto the 405 naked before I would ever consider even hugging her.”
“Damn, ‘kay then.” Ashton chuckled. He walked back towards the kitchen island where their mates were eating.
The traditions were light. They were simple, relaxing things that the band never had the chance to do, like movie nights and large orders of Uber Eats. Most nights, they went out and experienced life like typical chumps would do. But pre-tour traditions meant R&R, and you were not R&R.
To Luke, it seemed as though the rest of his friends enjoyed your company. His blood boiled at the thought of his night being ruined by you. His friends would tell him to avoid you and not let you spoil his fun, but he simply could avoid the frustration building while you laughed at stupid jokes. He would be laughing to had he actually cared for your company. If he kicked you out, it would ruin the night for his friends. Because of you, Luke really could not win.
And then, you said, “well, I gotta bounce. Am I dropping by your place at around nine tomorrow, Cal?”
To this, Luke nearly beamed.
“Nine on the dot,” responded Calum as he tilted his drink towards you.
“Cool beans.”
Another friend interjected the conversation. “C’mon, you can stay for a bit, can’t you? Maybe Luke will finally be the one to win the tattoo draw. Bet you’d pay to see that.”
Luke could feel perspiration under his arms at the thought of you staying and being touched by a needle.
“Tattoo draw?” you asked, dangling the key to Calum’s house between your fingers.
“Tattoo draw,” Michael affirmed. “Whoever won, well, lost the draw last time picks a tattoo for the next person who’s drawn. They’re small tattoos, but they’re often fuckin’ shit. I have a tattoo of Cal’s response to his dick pick on the back of my thigh.”
“That was so long ago,” someone piped.
You chortled. “No offense, but these pre-tour traditions are kinda–– “
“Oh, they’re lame,” interrupted Michael, “we know. But they’re fucking funny when you’re high out of your mind.”
You glanced over to Luke, who felt as though he was sweating like a pig, then back at the group of friends before you. “I’m in.”
-
Luke had contributed $200 to the pool. Throughout the past few years, the total money in the pot increased as the band’s fame continued moving up. And still, even after all of this time, he had been fortunate to not have his name drawn. The only bonus was the cash prize–– and you were also inked for the rest of your life.
But it wasn’t all that bad. It would be a memory, and Luke was fond of memories.
The anger that followed your presence had begun to fade as the night went on. Thoughts were foggy, words were garbled, and laughter filled the concrete walls and penetrated the thick, cloudy rooms. Plenty of crap foods had been consumed, plus two bottles of whiskey, by the time names were drawn.
You were right, Luke thought. Everything about the traditions were lame, and they were only routine because of their old teenage minds. The hazier he felt, the more he became lost in his own brain.
And then your name was drawn.
He had to keep himself from bursting into screeching laughter. It was easy to read the pure terror written all over your features from your wide eyes to your deep frown. Ashton, who had been last tour’s tattoo winner, nudged you playfully.
“’s all right, babe,” he said. “You don’t have to do it if you don’t wanna. Someone will be glad to do it for ya, I’m sure.”
You stared at the money pool on the coffee table before you. “I get all of that?”
Ashton nodded.
“You promise the tattoo’ll be small?
“Microscopic.”
You sighed. “Okay. Let’s go.”
Luke kept quiet for the next half hour as the group waited for the arrival of the tattoo artist. He watched your face, how it contorted and how it relaxed. He was hyper-focused on every little line and detail of your skin, and it was all because of how your demeanor changed. You appeared vulnerable now, a stark contrast to what Luke had known for nearly a year. You were witty. You were always ready to tear someone down with words when necessary. But now, you were nervous. You weren’t the same.
It bothered him tremendously.
Things only went downhill from there. Ashton, being the cocky bloke he occasionally could be, had a brilliant idea.
“I know how much you love Luke,” he said, an odd smirk toying on his lips as he exchanged glances between the two of you. “I want you to get his name tattooed.”
Luke choked on his glass of whiskey.
You snorted. “Nope. That’s a funny one, Irwin.”
“No money for ya then.”
“I don’t even know how much is in there,” you said. Meanwhile, the artist looked less than pleased to be here, and Luke didn’t blame him.
Calum winced and said, “’bout four thousand, babe. It’s a pretty big one this year.”
You gaped, mouth falling wide as you glared at Luke, who, truth be told, had no say in the situation. As much as he didn’t want his name on your body, it would have been kind of funny otherwise.
“I’ll shoot you a proposition,” said Ashton, his foot landing on the chair beside your thigh so he could lean over you. “Instead of his full name, just get his initials. L-R-H.”
Luke hated this.
“That’s–– “ You looked at Luke again, almost as if you were waiting for his approval. He didn’t speak. ‘That’s not so bad.”
Ashton grinned.
“Where would I get it?”
“Under-boob!” a voice called out from behind Luke.
A few groans washed through the group, and even Luke felt upset with the suggestion. He hated you, but he didn’t hate you that much.
“You shut your fuckin’ face, Stevens,” you responded, and that caused Luke to smile. There was the old you.
Ashton shrugged. “Anywhere you want it.”
And then, after looking Luke dead in the eyes for the thousandth time that night, you smirked. Finally, a rush of confidence flooded over you, and it chilled him to his very core. He didn’t understand why it cut right through his chest, and then you said, “under-boob it is.”
Luke decided he would no longer hold anything back. He hated you through and through.
-
Luke kept his mouth shut when his friends mentioned you. He kept it shut when they called you and talked about inside jokes. He kept it shut when they drunkenly stated they missed you. But when the Paris tour date came around and you were seated at their brunch table, he couldn’t keep himself from saying, “why the fuck are you here?”
And his friends were quick to defend, just like Luke expected. At that moment, it finally hit him that it didn’t matter. It didn’t matter that he couldn’t be himself around you. It didn’t matter that he was the only one uncomfortable with your presence. It didn’t matter, because Luke finally realized he had no reason to feel this way. Yet he couldn’t shake the feeling.
Maybe he didn’t hate you. Maybe his blood just boiled because everyone loved you, and he didn’t love you. Maybe he found frustration in every one of your actions because he was the only one who couldn’t enjoy himself when you were there. Maybe he just had to take two seconds to get over himself and let others be happy.
Luke sunk in his seat, eyes glued on the condensation on the side of his mimosa glass while his friends chatted and laughed. He thumbed his napkin, powdered sugar coating his fingers once more. For the first time since knowing you, Luke felt guilty for treating you the way he did.
He didn’t speak for the next hour and a half. And, when he did speak, it was a word or two at a time, gaze cast to the roads once painted in the blood of the French Revolution. He wasn’t much up for going out on the town when night fell–– it was better he preserved his voice for the concert tomorrow anyway. Instead, he remained in his tiny hotel room, sweaty feet kicked up on the thousand-thread duvet while a French dubbed Iron Man 2 played on his television. At one point, he ordered himself room service, and the apple cobbler plus a sparkling bottle of white wine were too big for him to finish alone.
And somehow, as if it were fate, there was a soft knock on his door.
Luke stumbled over, slightly buzzed already as he looked through the dirty peephole to see you. He swung the door open.
“Why’re you here?” he asked, surprisingly without a swear. “Thought you were with the rest.”
You glanced behind him. “I smelled apple cobbler,” you said. A shrug and a smirk later, you made your way past him.
Luke rolled his eyes and shut the door behind him. “Didn’t invite you in.”
You were already sat on the opposite twin bed, hand reaching for the fancy bottle on the nightstand before taking a long swig of the bubbly drink.
“Why’re you here?” he repeated.
“I–– “ You let out a satisfied sigh and set the bottle down. “I got tired. Got in an Uber pool with this gorgeous dude who kept using the words très belle, and then I remembered you were home.”
Luke sat on his bed and quirked an eyebrow at you. “You got tired and came here? What, are you on crack?”
You laughed, and he kind of did, too.
“Y’hate me,” he said. “You’re not here without reason.”
You raised your hands in surrender. “Kay,” you said, “ya got me. I wanna make out with you. Have a lil bang-bang-bang action.”
Luke had to keep himself from chuckling again. “Shut the fuck up.”
You grinned; your eyes were brighter than he had ever seen them around him. The two of you were both a little tipsy, and he chose to blame that for him not being totally upset with you invading his quiet night.
Things fell silent for a moment, and he let himself get lost in the foreign dialogue of Tony Stark and Pepper Potts.
“Why do you hate me?”
Luke’s head snapped over to you. You were relaxed, legs spread on the leg before you with your back against the headboard, and you were still facing the television. The bottle of wine was now in between your thighs.
“I wanted to be your friend so badly,” you said. “When I got your number, I put a little heart next to your name. And then, you never answered me when I tried to text you. You started rolling your eyes at everything I said, even when I was just walkin’ up to greet you. I thought my occasional teasing was just harmless. Is that–– is that why you hate me?”
Luke frowned. He had no idea what to say, especially since he couldn’t tear his eyes away from you, and you couldn’t even look at him.
“I-I guess I just need you to tell me that my efforts are pointless,” you mumbled, hands reaching out to pick up the bottle from between your legs. “I feel stupid even bein’ around ya now.”
“No,” he said, “I don’t hate you. I’m sorry.”
Finally, you looked his way. “Let’s get drunk.”
The night muddled through, and to Luke’s surprise, he hadn’t had simple fun like that in ages. In your beautiful drunken stupor, you spoke your best French, although it came out as slurred gibberish while you danced around to the soundtrack from the movie Mannequin. His stomach ached from laughter, and at one point, he even joined you. He didn’t think twice about his hands lazily resting on your hips while the two of you passed the second bottle of wine around. The phone rang at about one in the morning; it was a lovely call from the front desk about a noise complaint.
Luke giggled around you. Colors and shapes swirled around him a little more than usual, and your touch burned his already-hot skin. By the time endorphins calmed and the night slowed to a stop, deep conversations met pillow talk. He was hesitant to speak on behalf of his feelings, but you were keen on sharing your entire life story and traumas with him. You cried, and he let it be on his shoulder. He chose to talk about himself for once, to get the pressure off of you. Cuddling became tickling, and soon enough, the two of you were shouting lyrics to “Beat Patrol” with uncontrollable laughter once again. When you said goodnight, your arms tossed themselves around his waist as you pecked his flushed cheeks. And then you were gone, and he decided he didn’t like the absence.
He didn’t forget about it the next day. You were quiet, and you kept your distance, so he did the same. But something had changed, that he knew. It pricked at his stomach, and when you hopped aboard a flight the next day after that, he realized he missed you. It was funny how a mere few hours could change a mind.
-
“Do you think Y/N was the one that psychic talked about?”
“What?”
Calum had been silently chewing on a cold slice of pizza when the question hit his brain. Luke, on the other hand, was washing down his midnight meal with a bottle of beer. The tour had been over for about a week, and they had all been sleeping for days straight. Well, all except for Luke, who found himself unable to close his eyes while he tried not to think about that one night with you. It was one fucking night. By this point, nearly all of the events had vanished from his mind, but he couldn’t shake the honest happiness he felt while singing along to cheesy songs from the 1980s. He couldn’t get over your impromptu stand-up comedy show and your terrible John Mulaney impression.
“The psychic, Gina,” said Calum. “You remember that, right?”
“Yeah,” Luke replied, a little wary of where the conversation was headed.
Calum straightened his posture and slapped the pizza back down onto the greasy cardboard box. “D’ya think Y/N is who she was talking about?”
“I–– “ Luke thought for a moment as he racked his brain. He hadn’t mentioned that night with you to anyone, but they all knew his prior distaste for you. Now, he couldn’t help but think of the accuracy of the psychic’s testament. You didn’t like him, he didn’t like you, but now he kind of did like you. “No,” he said, “not a chance. It’s Y/N. Fuckin’ hate her.”
Calum nodded. A frown pulled at his lips. “She’s great, mate. Y’oughta give her a chance.”
Luke had given you a chance, and it worked all too well.
“Maybe you’ll fall in love with her.”
The blond snorted. “I can’t even be in the same room as her, Cal. Don’t see romantic escapades in our future. No–– no drunken late-nights with comedy impressions and Starship dance-offs.”
“’s oddly specific, but okay,” said Calum. He shut the pizza box a moment later and slid it back into the fridge, and meanwhile, Luke felt a pit growing in his stomach. “You’re too stubborn,” his friend continued. “And ugly. Like, too damn ugly for her anyway.”
Luke smirked, tilting his beer in Calum’s direction. “Cheers to that, mate.”
Through the dying laughter, Luke’s smile fell into a frown, and he couldn’t quite grasp the reason why. It was possible that the idea of falling for someone like you didn’t seem so terrible after all.
-
A few dozen people had gathered in the backyard by the time you arrived. Luke spent the first hour of the party cradling a beer, keeping himself out of sight on the porch but in view of the pool. His shirt had already become unbuttoned, and his curls had loosened and stuck flat against his skin due to the humidity in the hot air. And you... you looked marvelous.
Luke had been so focused on trying not to think about you, he ended up thinking about you every hour of every day. He caught himself scrolling through your Instagram page after failing to fall asleep, and he thought about what would have happened had you stayed in his hotel room a little longer. When your face popped into his brain, his heart hurt. He had started to idealize the two of you together–– exactly what he hadn’t wanted.
So, he isolated himself in the kitchen after your arrival, a series of nonconsecutive thoughts whirling through his head while he chipped away at the sticker on his warm beer. The party was outside, and he was in there, wondering how on earth he let himself start falling for the person he never wanted to know.
“I told Calum to queue up some Starship.”
Your voice was confident as you slid the back door closed behind you. Luke focused on your footsteps, but he refused to turn around as you approached him.
“If I can’t jam to some “Beat Patrol”, then honestly, what’s the point of being here?” you continued with a light laugh. You were grinning from ear to ear when you placed yourself in front of Luke, the close proximity causing him to hold in a gasp.
He cracked a smile. “Who invited you?”
“I invited myself,” you replied, “thank you very much.” You tilted your drink in his direction before taking a quick sip and setting it beside Luke’s on the counter. “The question is: why are you in here alone, bud? Lookin’ so glum n’ all.”
Luke’s heartbeat had begun to pick up, and humidity from the outside had seeped its way into the kitchen. He placed his palms on his pants to dry them off.
You frowned–– he had taken too long to answer. “You okay?”
He nearly jumped at the feeling of your hand brushing against his arm, and then he noticed that you had moved slightly closer. “I–– “ Luke coughed. “’m fine.” The weight on his arm never left.
“C-can I ask you something?” you spoke up again after a few moments of silence. You didn’t wait for his answer. “Do you hate me?”
His eyes met yours, despite the pain settling in his chest because of the contact. “You’ve asked me that before,” he said and smirked.
“I know,” you said quickly. “But, do you?”
Luke shook his head. “No. I could–– I could never.”
You nodded.
He nearly leaned in a little. The heavy tension and spike in energy tilted his body and its weight on the balls of his feet, but he held back in fear. All he wanted to do was see how you felt beneath his touch.
“Okay,” you then mumbled. Your voice was hushed, and you refused to look at him again. Somehow, the distance between the two of you shrunk once again.
Luke swallowed. His fingers played with the neck of his half-empty bottle; they spun it around and around while his brain told him what to do and what not to do.
And then, the hand that had been grazing his arm moved up to rest on his chest, and Luke restrained himself from completely losing himself in you. It was as if the music from the world outside had been sucked into a vacuum, and the air around him was dense with heat and sexual tension, but he could only notice your breath ghosting his lips. There was something about the nudging of noses and fluttering of eyelids that pushed him over the edge. So, when your lips finally met in a soft, velvety kiss, he couldn’t hold back the desire that had been building up for months.
While your hands plaited through his hair, Luke’s were firm on your waist. He had pulled you into him, all previous thoughts out the door while your lips slotted against his. It was wet yet warm, and a familiar sensation tightened in his abdomen. His cheeks were hot and pink–– that he knew for sure.
But you pulled away quickly, gasps falling as you sputtered out apologies. “I shouldn’t–– that was–– weird, right?”
Luke wanted to shake his head no, but instead, all he could do was nod.
“We–– we hate ea–– I’m sorry,” you said, grabbing your beer quickly and making a b-line for the sliding glass door.
Underneath Luke’s eyes, the skin burned, but he quickly shook it off. He wasn’t going to cry because you walked out on him. He was, however, disheartened tremendously.
The rest of the night, he spent his time avoiding you. Truth be told, he spent his time avoiding everyone. He loitered around his practice room, used the bathroom for twenty minutes, and locked himself in his room until the crowd outside died down. No one bothered to check up on him, not even you. It was when he had come to terms with his isolation that you knocked on his door and stumbled in. Immediately, he knew you had a few too many drinks.
Neither of you said a word as you ambled over, giggles leaving your lips before you flopped onto his bed beside him. Pillows flew and the duvet slipped to the floor, but Luke didn’t care. In the beginning, he never wanted to picture you in his bed–– it made him sick to think about. But then he purposefully avoided the thought, for he simply knew he’d find himself wanting to picture it more and more. So now, he had to keep his stomach from knotting. He had to keep himself from looking over and spilling out a word-vomit of feelings that he didn’t even want to have.
And then, you started touching his face.
At first, Luke wanted to laugh. You were cute albeit clumsy, yet the silence and evident tension settled in his shoulders, and every graze of your fingers on his flushed skin sent shivers up his spine. Fingers running over cheeks and closed eyelids, your touch so gentle he could barely feel it, but he did. You brushed the ridge of his brows, the curve of his nose, and finally, the dip of his cupid’s bow. He couldn’t breathe as you lightly traced the soft skin of his lips.
His lips felt cold once your fingers left, but they soon skimmed the hollowing of his cheeks back down to where his lips parted in a silent gasp. You pressed one finger against the separation of skin, and he kissed it gently. Then, you placed another finger there, and he continued.
Luke wanted to shoo your hand away. He blinked up at the ceiling while your hand traveled down his Adam’s Apple and onto his collarbones. Your touch was so light, so beautiful–– he was completely enamored at this moment. He had to clench his jaw while your hand traced the hairs on his chest.
The weight in his bed shifted, and suddenly your body was wedged up against his, your nose nudging his chest as you peppered kisses up and down it. Luke’s heart rate decided to make a break for it.
“No, no, no,” he breathed out, reaching over and pushing you away from him. He rose instantly while his hands fumbled to button up his shirt. It would be obvious to anyone as to how utterly flustered he was. “No, you can’t–– you can’t do that to me.”
You grinned. “Why not? Yer so pretty! Like a fuckin’ angel that fell from heaven. You glow.”
“I-I don’t–– no, what?” Luke sputtered, nerves rising to his throat as he finally got a good look at you in your drunken state. He already knew what you were like drunk, but he never saw you like this while sober.
“Ya deserves to be kissed,” you said.
Luke wanted to smile; except he couldn’t have things end up this way. He felt so much, maybe too much, and he wanted it to be good. You had hardly blinked.
“Um,” Luke whispered, “thanks. I–– I should–– I should check on the party.”
“Oh, yeah!” you squeaked. “Go, go, go!”
He nodded, excusing himself quickly and then shutting the door behind him. But he couldn’t walk any farther than that. With a sigh, he pressed his back against the door and looked down to his feet. Every muscle in his body tensed and relaxed while his brain went black. Luke didn’t know what to think. He wasn’t sure he would ever know how to admit how he felt. However, he did know that needed to pay a certain psychic a visit.
part two
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dahniwitchoflight · 5 years
Text
Candy 18-21
oh, oh no
I’ve heard things about Jane x Gamzee
now I get to experience them, oh boy...
Gamzee gets, strangely serious about stuff for once, huh, who would have thunk it
yeah, It’s clear Jane’s political stuff seem to stem from some kind of fear that one day humanity won’t exist on Earth C for whatever reason
that over time, the population of trolls versus humans will eventually skew so much that there won’t be any adam and eve left to match up with each other
in her mind she really doesn’t hate trolls, cuz its not really about the trolls, not at all, but obviously her actions are equivalent to someone who does hate them and she just doesn’t get that
and like, yeah if you just left them to their own devices, maybe that would happen, but then (and I can’t believe I’m saying this) Gamzee has an extremely good point that they already did that when they plopped all the ectokids down and called it a day for a 1000 years, like, they managed to figure it out on their own just fine
and also
ectobiology will literally never stop being a thing so like, as long as some of the god kids stick around, eventually you can just make more humans it’s no big deal to restart the human gene pool since it will be identical to the first time they started it
there’s no reason to make sure this system runs smoothly the “natural way” it won’t, this situation is unnatural for both species
Jane’s just gotta realize that if she wants humans to keep sticking around, she just has to keep supporting the human population, that’s it, whatever trolls do or don’t do doesn’t matter for that goal
course it doesn’t help to compare trolls to animals when talking about their breeding rate and how it naturally evolved over time unlike the apparently non animal humans Janey
Also Alternian society is def not how troll society naturally is but like how could she know that? And how could any troll near her really explain that? 
aaaand I got so up in taking this seriously I forget who was talking
Jane’s into troll blackrom though that’s interesting and unexpected 
oh wow, Jake was there the whole time
Did they really name Jake and Jane’s baby Tavros??? oh jeesus
Yeah Kinda figured the Jane x Jake thing wasn’t gonna actually be happy
I’m really surprised Jane’s version of happiness apparently involves boinking a weird funny man I mean, she canonically likes clowns and jokes, so at the same time I’m not surprised, I mean, she WAS raised by the condesce, it’s just weird how that influence comes out in her sometimes versus how it doesn’t come out in her
literal Jake nightmare scenario though I think lol
really hammering home how the passions of youth don’t really translate well to happy adult relationships
Oh, so there’s the part where Jade reveals she has Bec biology, considering the fandom reaction you’d think we were gonna get some kind of gross M rated sex scene where she pegs Karkat or something
but all she does is talk about how she’d love a normal family and home life and lament that her circumstances ended up not really allowing that and giving enough hints that we can figure out why that would be
it’s not handled grossly at all, even if the subject matter is odd and it doesn’t come off as some sort of character sabotage
this whole time what we’ve known all Jade was that she was lonely and just wanted a family, not that hard to figure out why, girl’s got the same complex as Joey Claire about her family situation, but she’s more reserved about her feelings since she didn’t get to have a comparison of role models like Joey did with her babysitter and also Jade’s food and shelter needs were somewhat taken care by a planet guardian so the affect was somewhat lessened on the outside, she just didnt get the same chances as Joey to be able to articulate her emotional turmoil about it
aww Jade’s not happy either, well, that’s how it goes when you make relationship decisions based on flimsy passions that are more about fulfilling the needs of the self than about actually wanting good things for a partner
More like Jade’s sort of realized that Karkat and Dave don’t have a genuine romantic interest in her and she’s the only one keeping this ship afloat
oh shit, a dead younger jade, oh damn wait she’s the one from Meat that was trapped in the house juju and then immediately died from space razors
Yeah’s she’s a bloody symbol of meat that’s for sure, theyre making that pretty clear
“Her eyes go wide and she feels the breath go out of her for a moment. She looks directly upward. Where did this body come from?”
Again, if we take that symbolism circle of Breath = Sugar = Drugged up High =  Breath
This little dash of meat falling into wonderland would break the breathy haze for a bit wouldn’t it?
So if this kind of thing can happen to others besides John, there’s hope yet for something of value to come from Candy
“ There’s a peaked skylight at the top of the foyer that splits the morning sun like a prism, spilling multicolored dots across every surface below. Amongst those dots are drips of teen-Jade’s blood. It’s so dark on the spotless tile that it looks nearly black. “
I wish I could draw things, I’d love to draw this exact scene here, it’s pretty and morbid
Yeah, the relationship theme of Candy seems to be that everyone’s jumping into Kismesis plus Matesprite threesomes, that seem to be neither of what anyone actually wants in totality
There’s some realization that their Candy filled atmosphere is actually more a drug or a poison, teen jade can’t be revived, and it’s not because of what happened to her, but more because of the environment she is in now
Ah Roxy, ever the social chameleon people pleaser, not working this time though
Jade’s is easily explained already as she has the social graces of an elephant
It is kinda sad tho to see most of the human characters actually aren’t that good at being cool about troll stuff
“CALLIOPE: pUrple roses traditionally represent love at first sight, however these roses are actUally red roses that we prepared Using a blUe dye.CALLIOPE: the blUe rose is the most elUsive and mysterioUs of all flowers.CALLIOPE: the combination of red and blUe in this context is meant to evoke the dUal natUre of death, in that there is nothing more mysterioUs and impossible to comprehend than the vast void of the afterlife, bUt also there is nothing that makes Us appreciate the life and and love that we already have than the mystery of death.CALLIOPE: while death is terrifying, there is always joy to be foUnd among the sorrow. each time we witness death, we fall in love with the important people in oUr lives all over again.“
Why do I get the feeling Calliope is talking about actual rose here somehow?
Is it because she started off with “here’s the symbolism of Purple Roses”?
a Red Rose dyed Blue
Now if Cascade taught us anything Blue and Red certainly represent a mutual destruction of opposites coming together to create a third new thing in the blaze of the aftermath, but that thing was a Green Sun, not something purple, so why bring Rose into mind for all of this?
We have been seeing the effects of what happens when people in candyland awaken from their drug haze with a smattering of blood, but in that case why not make the symbolism more clear by saying a Blue Candied Rose dyed Red as if with Bloodied Meat?
is it more to mean that the correct path lies NOT in Candy being dyed Red, but in Meat being dyed Raspberry Blue?
I Mean, Candy!Rose certainly seems shaken here, having gotten jolted out of her drugged haze at some point, but unable to See, and she’s actually starting to be concerned about that and Meat!Rose is kind of out of commission at this point, So I guess to get things back on track, Candy!Rose would have to go back to the Meat somehow, or might be the influence needed to snap Meat Rose out of her daze
Though I don’t like how this is taking place in the context of a funeral, specifically bringing to mind how Dirk did the same thing using the vessel of Death, I hope Candy Rose doesn’t try to just, off herself
with Dirk taking control of Rose’s ultimate self in Meat, Candy!Rose might be the only true Rose left to take heroic action
Aww, Callie is still head over heels for Roxy, I’m really surprised with this theme of threesomes that nothing ever came of a John x Roxy x Callie, but then again all the threesomes so far have been painted Black and Red, and unless John or Roxy was to form a Kismesis with Callie, I don’t see it happening at all
OH SHIT SPEAKING OF RED AND BLUE
Damn, Sollux and Aradia are here
“KARKAT: MAYBE FUCKING NEPETA IS ABOUT TO POUNCE FROM BEHIND THAT GROTESQUE STATUE OF THE HUMAN SUFFERER T-POSING OVER THERE.”
Karkat don’t tease me about Nepeta but also again WHY is actual Jesus here.
Is Roxy a christian in this timeline? Was she legit just praying to actual Human Jesus? That’s so, weird, especially for Roxy to do, what the fuck in Roxy’s upbringing on an apocalypse earth would make her want to worship Jesus?
Oh wait, that’s obviously what she thinks that every other human sincerely does, since she only had human media to go off of, and like, technically no human has ever said they DONT worship christian gods to her.
“GAMZEE: wHeN tHe DoOr Of ThAt FrIdGe pOpPeD oPeN iT wAs LikE i Be AlL sEeIn ThE lIgHt AnD sHiT.
SOLLUX: well yeah
SOLLUX: that’s what happens when s0me0ne 0pens a d00r t0 a t0tally dark encl0sure.“
Gamzee has had a weirdly meta understanding of what’s going on so far, for some reason, I can’t fathom what could be the Lighty influence that he’s gotten
unless...
Dirk really IS starting to subsume Ultimate Rose, and that’s bleeding over to every Ultimate self connected to Dirk
the more Gamzee knows meta shit and says oddly correct things, the more we know Dirk is “winning” over Rose
Oh, that’s why Gamzee is really here isn’t he? I mean, storywise? He’s a Dirk thermometer/gauge/thing, he’s our way of measuring how far Dirk’s influences are going in Meat
“ARADIA: its so nice that you believe all that gamzee
ARADIA: i think i can honestly say
ARADIA: im reasonably happy for you?“
lol
“blue smoke”
You don’t really tend to describe Smoke as being Blue right? At least, I don’t think that’s usual
But if we’re straight up associating Candy with Blue  to complement Meat with Red now, it’s just making the whole Sugar = Breath thing that much stronger
*EDIT* DUH OF COURSE OF CANDY’S COLOR IS BLUE
BLUE GUSHERS. OBVIOUSLY. *end edit*
and I mean, what is Breath but a weird bluey smoke?
Roxy just wants to be happy with all her friends, that’s all
It is a good shake at trying to explain the nature of infinite possibility, that in reality, there isn’t really more weight put into one possibility over others, that’s how it works in real life anyway
unfortunately a storyline of canon is going to favor some version of events over others, and people make choices because they have preferences for that choice over other choices, something that seems kind of lost on Candy!Roxy who seems to just be okay with going along with anything because everything has an equal chance for having happytimes in this place
Roxy may be starting to lose her sense of self as well, and with her knowledge on things and how’s she’s been described as immutable so far, I wouldn’t be surprised at her having easily and subtly slipped into Ultimate Self hood herself and just being really okay with the idea that there is no one true Roxy, that she is just one piece of many, and not like, needing to delve into that further, not needing to connect with all her alternate selves, happy just being singular but at the same time completely malleable
Oh! Baby time.
Oh fuck, Al!Calliope in Jade time.
Why is Callie so afraid of Alt!Callie? That didn’t come across in their meetings in Homestuck as much, so why is that different here?
Is it because of Jade’s earlier comment of “there can only be one instance of a person here” and Callie doesn’t think she can win against Alltie?
Also, all these instances of Alltie appearing in Jade’s body is making me worried Alltie is doing something to both of their Ultimate Selves, like she’s subsuming Jade somehow like Dirk is subsuming Rose
I mean, they are fighting one another, so if Dirk’s doing something she has to keep pace right? In her mind, it’s probably totally justified
this is getting long enough for this post though, off we go again but I’m still reading
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