#(I mean I'm almost certain I won't be able to go but still)

[queerfables]

Why all the crowd scenes look the same, aka: Something is WRONG in Soho

I'm not even gonna tease and draw this out because it's so cool it doesn't need the fanfare. Ready?

Season 2 takes place over the course of 5 days. During that time, most of the passersby in Soho - maybe even all of them - stay exactly the same. It's the same people every day, wearing the exact same clothes, and they wander through the neighbourhood in paths that don't make any sense. You won't be able to unsee it. I can't believe it's taken us this long to realise.

Don't believe me? Rewatch the scene from 2x03, I Know Where I'm Going where Shax confronts Crowley outside the bookshop, appearing in a series of different guises. Pay attention to the people going past.

I've marked out five people you see on screen when Crowley first exits the bookshop at 39:37:

Numbers 1, 2 and 3 are following the path right. Number 4 follows the path left. Number 5 crosses the road.

Here the five people are again, at 40:19, when Crowley goes to return to the bookshop:

Number 5 is still visible in the distance, in the direction she walked in. This makes sense! But numbers 1, 2, 3 and 4 are rounding the same corner they just passed. It's as though 1, 2 and 3 all decided to turn and head back the way they came just 40 seconds ago, and number 4 has circled the block to join them.

This on its own would be super weird, but they're not the only people to do that in this scene. The man in the purple sweater from the first picture crosses the road, then appears back next to the bookshop, then starts walking back the way he came again.

Here's the part that made me absolutely certain, though. At 40:05, a man wearing an orange hoodie with blue sleeves walks past Crowley, who is heading towards the bookshop entrance.

The camera cuts to a view from behind Crowley, and a moment later, at 40:08...

He reappears in front of Crowley and walks past him again.

It's such a distinctive outfit, there's no mistaking it. They are absolutely fucking with the background characters and they are absolutely doing it on purpose.

Your turn. There are at least three other characters in this scene who pass by multiple times. Watch it again and try to spot them.

This scene is really chaotic and obvious, but the phenomena I'm talking about is much bigger than just one scene. Let's go back to the first thing I said: the background characters don't change. All our leads do. Maggie and Nina wear distinctive outfits, clearly demarcating each new day. Even Crowley and Aziraphale, who in season 1 were like cartoon characters with wardrobes full of identical clothing, vary their looks. Crowley changes his (very subtly) each day; Aziraphale is less rigid on timing, but he has a few different coats that he switches between. The background characters, on the other hand, wear the same outfits every single day. They walk by on the street but they never actually seem to have a destination. They sit in the coffee shop or pub and don't eat or drink anything, and nearly everyone leaves together exactly on closing time. It's eerie.

For reference's sake, here's a rough timeline of season 2, with pictures of Maggie and Nina's outfits to show the passing of time. I had to outsource this section because my post was too image heavy, lol. The main point I wanted to make is that five days go by.

Five days, and all the same faces keep showing up in the background, and almost none of them change their clothes. I'm not entirely sure what it means, but there's no way it's an accident. It might, in fact, be a game changer. To me this is proof positive that something is not as it seems. I've been a massive Clue skeptic, adamant that I'd only be convinced by the most unambiguous evidence, and honestly? This is enough to move the dials. It's too big for me to ignore. Whatever grand explanation of Good Omens we come up with has to account for this. I don't have it yet, but my current working theories are that Crowley and Aziraphale are under some seriously heavy surveillance, that time warping is involved, or that reality itself is not what it seems.

It would take a really long time for me to go through all of the background characters who turn up over and over but I do want to show you what I'm talking about. To wrap up, then, I'm going to pick out some memorable characters and walk you through a few of their appearances through the week. I highly recommend looking out for this yourself on your next rewatch and seeing how many other characters you can recognise.

Yellow Skirt

The first person I kept coming back to as being not quite right. You probably remember her from the first episode - she's the one who waves and walks past Maggie and Nina the night they're locked in together. Incidentally, she's also Person Number 3 in the scene with Shax.

Day 1 (2x01 - 36:20):

Day 2 (2x02 - 42:03)

Day 3 (2x03 - 06:36)

Day 5 (2x06 - 30:00)

Coolest Leather Jacket In The World

It's not so easy to recognise people wearing lots of nondescript dark colours, but I love his hair and his jacket, so he stood out to me. I think there might be a lot more people who are wearing fairly nondescript clothes who I just can't recognise from episode to episode.

Day 2 (2x02 - 16:44)

Day 4 (2x04 - 41:20)

Day 5 (2x06 - 29:20)

Dressed In Mustard

Ms Mustard shows up everywhere. If you want to see what I mean about their paths not making sense, pay attention when she comes on screen, because she'll often show up a few times in succession and walk very purposefully to nowhere in particular. The thing that she is doing, essentially, is behaving like an extra in a tv show. Which of course she is, but you're supposed to make that invisible by not having the same person go back and forth in the same scene, or changing up their outfit each in-universe day to give the sense time is passing. Not doing that is a really deliberate choice.

Day 1 (2x01 - 22:37)

Day 2 (2x02 - 42:03)

Day 3 (2x03 - 01:49)

Day 3 (2x03 - 37:07)

Day 5 (2x06 - 29:59)

Swishy Dress

This character shows up a lot in the first episode. I've struggled to find her in later episodes, though. None of the characters seem to follow the same patterns or show up to equal extents each day, which makes me think this isn't a straightforward time loop. I haven't actually cross referenced character appearances to in world times, though. Possibly this is a project for someone who's more across the time-related shenanigans than me.

Day 1 (2x01 - 22:43)

Day 3 (2x03 - 07:01)

Yellow Vest

I've only seen this guy a handful of times, always around the French restaurant. I wonder if there's significance to that.

Day 2 (2x02 - 41:06)

Day 4 (2x05 - 12:49)

Fuzzy Blue Coat

Another background character who shows up frequently. The blue doesn't stand out quite as much as the yellows and reds some characters wear, but it's very distinctive.

While we're getting a lot of shots of the street, it's worth noting that I'm pretty sure the vehicles we see are also just the same few cars repeating each day. A lot of them are in neutral silvers and monochrome, but there's a couple of blue cars, one red, and one black and white that I'm fairly sure I've seen over and over through the season.

Day 1 (2x01 - 22:45)

Day 2 (2x02 - 42:04)

Day 3 (2x03 - 02:00)

Day 5 (2x06 - 40:10)

Day 5 (2x06 - 48:56)

Day 5 (2x06 - 50:06)

One final note: Whatever this is, Nina's employee who you see in the background at the coffeeshop sometimes isn't affected by it. He's wearing different outfits each day. On the other hand, some of the other shopkeepers do seem affected. I'm fairly sure Mr Brown and Mrs Sandwich wear the same outfits a few different days, only changing because of Aziraphale at the ball.

And that's it! Thanks for reading and I hope your mind is blown as much as mine is.

EDIT:

Hey I don't mind anyone pointing out production reasons that this might be the case or disagreeing with my analysis (over-analysis, some might say 😉). Please be kind about it, though. I'm not ignorant of the practical limitations involved in film making, but some of these costumes were really distinctive in a way I thought might be intended to draw attention.

For those of you who do find this theory convincing, I feel I should mention that I was working under the assumption that this stuff would have taken a few days to film, even filming it all together. That would strongly suggest that the actors were deliberately costumed the exact same way over multiple days of shooting, which made me think it had to be purposeful. @coranax was kind enough to point out, though, that behind the scenes videos said the extras were filmed separately to the main actors because of Covid protocols. In that case, they could have done it in just one day and that weakens my confidence in its intentionality.

Finally, all of my points about the scene with Shax in 2x03 stand. That was not a case of accidental continuity errors, it was really elegantly choreographed to enhance the tension in the scene. I say that with confidence because the extras are doing exactly what Shax is doing: circling Crowley, appearing where he doesn't expect them, creating a whirlwind sense of being off balance and out of control. I think it's really cool and effective, whether there's a deeper meaning to it or not.

#good omens #good omens meta #fable talks good omens

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

New year, new me?

Nah.

New year NEW CHARACTERRRRRR BITCHESSSSS

So anyway.

Those ABC Headcanons I did for Mihawk, Shanks, Sanji, and Zoro a few months ago when I first started this Tumblr. I'm doing one for Crocodaddy now. Needed to iron them out to write him later in a fanfiction I already have in-progress, and this helps.

This also means I'll be accepting requests for him tentatively (I know I'm way behind on ask requests as is, bear with me pls).

Also excuse me while I squeal about being able to create semi-transparent banners and shit now

A through Z

NSFW Headcanons

A — Afterglow (How are they have sex?)

He'll be sitting up against the pillows and headboard of your shared bed, striking up a cigar while you're still lying alongside him gasping for air.

Glancing down at you in your utterly spent and trembling state, smirking with the cigar between his teeth and pulling you up by your shoulder to recline back against his chest.

Not at all above taunting you about how utterly ruined you are.

"Oh, what's wrong? Was it too much?"

Chuckling when you tell him to go fuck himself as he leans over to pour himself and you a small glass of bourbon.

Leaning down to brush his lips and nibble at your neck, murmur in your ear while you take a sip from your glass, praising you with that same edge of almost cruel amusement.

"Such a good little fuck toy."

This is the most relaxed you're usually going to see him, and the most inclined toward cuddling up with you he's going to be.

B — Backrubs? (Do they like them? Like giving them?)

First time you come into his office and circle around behind his chair, he's going to be suspicious, probably even standoffish about it—until your hands are rubbing his neck and his shoulders.

"The hell do you think you're—......oh. Oh, that's...mmmm..."

You won't hear one single further complaint out of him after that.

He's not going to ask you to do it again—he's more likely to demand that you do, to send for you after a particularly long day so he can just lean back and let you work your magic on his stiff muscles.

If he returns the favor at any point, you can rest assured that it's not without an ulterior motive—he won't settle for having his hand on you without getting more out of it.

C — Cuddling (Do they enjoy cuddling a lot or only at certain moments?)

He's more likely to pull you against him or onto his lap in public than he is in private—he likes showing off his trophies, after all, and you're among his most prized possessions.

Gets off on making sure that everyone around knows that you're his, tugging you onto his knee with an arm curled possessively around your waist.

In private, he's still not going to shove you away if you lay back and drape yourself across his lap.

He might not say so, but he honestly loves it. He'll probably absently stroke your hair or brush his thumb across your cheek—but he's not as likely to initiate.

D — Dance (Are they good at it? Do they enjoy it?)

He's got his share of experience—being a filthy rich business magnate doesn't come without its share of formal to-dos, after all.

He's going to spend the majority of said fraternizations discussing business and making connections—but he can't and won't ever resist any opportunity that arises to show you off, either.

Whether you ask or not, at some point he's going to wrap his arm around you and curl his hook around your waist—pull you in close by your chin to speak against your lips.

"Let's show these low-lives what they're missing."

Lowering his hand down and squeezing your ass to tug you against him.

It's definitely more of a command than a question, and he's already smirking because he knows you aren't going to protest—at least not if you know what's good for you.

E — Extravagant Gestures (Things they do to make you feel loved)

"Love" is a strong word, and one that it's going to take a hell of a long time for him to actually admit out loud or really show.

He'll mostly show his appreciation in a material manner—buying you flowers, jewelry, clothes.

Anything you desire or he thinks you deserve, he's going to give you without any hesitation. He doesn't always have much time to spend, but he has more than enough money to spend, and he's going to.

It might seem like empty gestures on the surface, but showering you with gifts is his main mode of affection.

When he does have time to spend, however, he makes sure that his sole focus is on you and you alone, either flat out ignoring anyone that dares interrupt or putting them in their place on the spot.

He intends to ensure that his lover should never have to need or want for anything.

F — Fighting (How do they handle arguments/apologies?)

He's not apologizing. Doesn't matter if he's at fault or in the wrong, he's not going to acknowledge it.

He'll typically keep a cool head about it, even if you're shouting—but if you take a stab at his pride, things are probably going to escalate until you're not on speaking terms for a bit.

Closest thing to an apology you're going to get is him conveniently forgetting about the whole thing and you suddenly being showered with even more lavish gifts than normal, likely even accompanied by little handwritten sappy notes.

He'll also probably let it go entirely if you come back and apologize, but he's going to remain bitter about it for a while.

At least until he gets you alone later to bend you over and grudge-fuck your brains out until he's satisfied you've learned your lesson.

G — Getting Hot (What do they do turn turn you on, and vice versa?)

He stays busy enough that it tends to stray from his mind that physical intimacy an important part of a healthy romantic relationship.

On the rare occasion he isn’t busy, however, he's likely to have his hands and lips all over you—even if you're busy at the time yourself, intent on distracting you from your own priorities and enjoying you at his own whim.

Pulling you back against him by your waist while you're in the middle of some important business or personal call, pushing his hand down between your thighs, his voice a low murmur in your ear, conveying in great detail what he plans to do to you.

"Hang up the phone...unless you want them to hear me ruining you."

Pushing his hook under your chin to tilt your head back, giving his lips free roam of your neck and your jaw, trailing them slowly across every inch of your exposed skin.

The quickest way to get him riled up is to subtly do the same to him in a situation where he can't do anything about it.

To cup your hands around his ear while he's in the middle of some important business or social exchange and whisper all your dirtiest fantasies, forcing him to keep up a calm and professional demeanor in spite of his carnal desire for you.

He's going to act like it's annoying him, but you know better.

You know that he's going to be tearing your clothes off the second he manages to get you alone.

H — Heartache (How would they handle it if you broke up with them?)

He's used to courting his losses, so in the surface it's going to seem like he's unbothered, and anyone that suggests otherwise is going to get their head bitten off over it.

He's going to be more cruel, more impatient with his subordinates.

He's going to be a lot more likely to fly off the handle at anything that could be taken as a slight or insult.

He's going to be unfocused in his business dealings, delegating more work than usual to those below him.

He's going to engage in a great deal of debauchery and self-destructive behavior to push you from his mind—rebound sex, heavy gambling, heavy drinking, chain smoking.

He's going to spend sleepless nights glaring uo at the ceiling and white-knuckling a bottle of liquor, beating himself up over it in silence and solitude.

He's probably going to end up drunkenly den den mushi dialing you after a few weeks, slurring about how big a mistake you made and how much better off he is...and slurring about how big a mistake he made while begging you to come back.

Emotional availability isn’t one of his strong suits.

I — Intimacy (When are they intimate with you? And how often?)

Whenever he feels like it.

He could go a week without paying you much attention at all; then revert to shoving you against a wall or pulling you onto his lap and having you every time he catches sight of you.

Depends largely on his mood, which depends largely on other aspects of his life.

Unless he's incredibly busy or frustrated from stress, he isn’t likely to turn you away if you initiate.

Whether you're circling behind him to rub his shoulders or sitting yourself on his lap, he's likely to pull you closer and breathe you in, brush his lips to your neck and jaw, enjoying some much needed peace and solace in your closeness.

But he's still going to tease and belittle you about it, making sure you feel his lips curve into a smirk against your skin.

"What's the matter? Does my little girl need some attention?"

J — Joker (How do they make you laugh)

His sense of humor is typically cruel and comes at the expense of others.

Certified master at roasting—typically with deadpan delivery, maybe with a hint of a condescending smirk as he verbally destroys whoever has dared to cross him.

There might be a playful insult battle between you and him here and there—he's not going to do it to be outright hurtful, but if you call him an arrogant prick (a slur he frankly agrees with and gladly owns), he's going to put you in your place and chuckle at whatever you manage to throw back at him.

K — Kissing (How good? How often?)

Like other brands of physical affection, he's not going to initiate it very often.

Which is a bit of a shame, because he's incredibly good at it—if more than a bit of a tease.

Slow and sensual, curling his hand around the back of your head, his teeth grazing against your bottom lip, tongue brushing against yours.

Smirking and drawing away when you moan to tease you in a low murmur.

"Oh...? Did you want more, sweetheart?"

Grasping your waist and pulling you against him aggressively to deepen the kiss, devouring your lips possessively with a low growl.

No qualms at all about doing so in public—he greatly enjoys the thrill of all those judgmental and envious eyes, of showing others what they're missing out on.

L — Lay down (How do they sleep with you? Are they a cuddler or do they prefer their space?)

His pride won't allow him to say so aloud, but he cannot sleep without you.

There's always the slightest subconscious worry, eating away at the back of his mind, that he doesn't do enough for you, that he isn’t there enough for you, a worry that really only surfaces in the minutes and hours before sleep when he has no choice but to be alone with his own thoughts.

He'll lay awake until you're there with him so he can pull you against his side, lower his head over yours and breathe in your scent, relaxing into the comfort of your warmth.

This is when he's most vulnerable, most affectionate, when he's anything even close to self-conscious.

When he might brush his lips to your temple and praise you in a low murmur without any expectation of you reciprocating.

"Mmm...so warm....."

He'll slip his arm under you, pull you against him, and refuse to release you until morning.

M — Making babies (Do they want to settle down and have kids?)

HAHAHAHAHAHA no

No, absolutely not.

This really isn’t negotiable. He has no interest in having children at all. Doesn't remotely have the patience necessary and doesn't wish to change his lifestyle to fit around parenthood.

N — Nervous? (How confident are they when it comes to romance?)

Confident really isn’t the word—the man's arrogance is unrivaled.

He's filthy rich, he has unrivaled social standing, the physique of a living god, he knows he could have damned near any woman he wants. Why the hell would he be worried?

His only concern is the matter of trust—that letting anyone get too close could be detrimental to his status. You could blackmail him, you could entice him too deeply and take him for all he's worth, so he might keep you ag arm's length for a while.

Despite his confidence, he also won't tolerate any other men hitting on you—you're his, and he doesn't share his things.

O — Oral Fixation (Giving or receiving? And how good are they?)

Far more into receiving.

Very into pulling out abruptly after fucking you relentlessly and forcing his cock down your throat while you're still gasping for air, reveling in the sight of your make-up smeared over your flushed face and the sound of you gagging on it.

"Yeah, that's it, baby—take every fucking inch—"

But he does love making you beg, and giving isn’t off the table if you satisfy him adequately and ask very nicely.

Just as much as he loves ruining you—so he's going to hold you down by your hip, isn’t going to stop until you're screaming, gasping, hyperventilating from overstimulation, limp and trembling and barely conscious in his grasp.

P — Pet Peeves (Things they don't like in a partner)

Excessive neediness is going to irritate the hell out of him.

He doesn't have the time or the patience to constantly offer his attention and reassurance, so he strongly prefers a confident and independent lover.

Absolutely can't stand you flirting with other men to make him jealous.

It might get his attention, but not in a good way.

He's already iffy about trust, and all that will do is put him on high alert and make him more likely to push you away.

Q — Quiet Time (How much alone time do they need, or do they want to be with you 24/7?)

He stays busy—whether it's running several profitable businesses around Alabasta or dealing with Cross Guild, he doesn't have much spare time, and he's pretty used to it.

That means he's also accustomed to a lot of alone time, and that it's required for his work.

He doesn't mind you being there while he's dealing with it, but only if you're quiet—if you insist on distracting him, he's not going to be pleased.

He's fine with you laying back across his lap, even against his chest with his arm stretched over your shoulders, just as long as you're not intentionally disturbing his concentration.

Though if you are intentionally disturbing him, he will bend you over and wear you out until you're too spent to bother him any further.

R — Romance (How romantic are they? Do they have to force it ir does it come natural?)

Not much of a romantic at all. He's pretty accustomed to just being able to win over women with money and status.

Dinner reservations at expensive restaurants where the waiting lists go on for months, ritzy parties and clubs, anything that allows him to throw his weight and wallet around and show you off.

He will make a point of keeping his attention in you—his arm curled around your waist, keeping you close at his side—but traditional romance is definitely not his strong suit.

S — Spending Money (How much do they like to spend on you?)

Physical touch is his love language, but it's best that yours is receiving gifts, because you're going to be getting a LOT of them.

Designer clothes, jewelry expensive enough that it could be used as collateral in purchasing a small nation, the finest perfumes, date nights that could cost a few hundred thousand berries—whatever your poison, he's providing it.

You're never going to want or need for anything. Even if something just briefly catches your eye in a shop window or a vendor stall, you're likely going to find it in your possession before the end of the day.

In a way it's an apology for not being able to spend as much time with you as he feels you deserve—he'll never say so out loud, that would injure his pride, but the implications of it are heavy.

Only the best of the best for his lady.

T — Trust (Are they trusting of you? Jealous?)

There are some definite trust issues with Croc. It's not uncommon for women to cozy up to him just for monetary and material gain, and he's well aware of it. It's going to take a lot of time for him to fully believe that this isn’t your endgame.

Even once he does trust you, may the heavens have mercy on any man whose eyes linger on you for too long, because he'll need divine intervention to save him if Crocodile catches him.

At that point it's less a matter of his trust wavering—it's more a matter of the fact that he does trust you, and doesn't want to lose that, to lose you now that you do have his trust.

U — Underwear (What kind do they wear, and what kind do they like on you?)

Tends toward tight boxers and briefs (always designer) to show off his physique.

That's his default, at least; you could pretty easily talk him into wearing something more skimpy if you want.

He's going to have a full closet of expensive lingerie for you. If it's something he wants to see you in, he's buying it.

The finest silk, the smoothest satin, the most delicate lace. If it's fit for a queen, then it's yours.

V — Vulnerable (How vulnerable are they with you? Is it easy for them to open up to you?

There's a solid steel wall separating you from his emotions and his past that is damned near impossible to break down.

He has to be able to trust you before he can be open, and again, that's going to take time. A lot of time.

He doesn't allow himself to take that kind of risk—one single mistake, being the slightest bit too open with the wrong person, and every ounce of power he's built up could come crashing down on the wings of blackmail and betrayal.

That being said, once you do manage to gain his trust, you'll be the only person he's open with.

And he'll be completely open, because it's a bit addictive, as it's not something he's accustomed to—being able to be comfortably vulnerable is a nice, relaxing change of pace.

W — Wine and Dine (Do they prefer meals at home or going out with you? Who does more of the cooking?)

Domestic endeavors definitely aren't his forte. He's had a personal chef on his staff since well before he met you.

He isn't going to prevent you from cooking if you enjoy it—though he might find it a little strange, since it's a task he considers below him.

He might even watch you out of sheer curiosity, though it's doubtful he will partake; he'll be more likely to sit back and puff on a cigar, taking the opportunity to enjoy the view and let his eyes roam over you while you work.

Overall, he would usually prefer to just go out, or let the staff handle it...but he does find something particularly enticing about seeing you working with your hands, regardless the reason.

X — X-Rated (How good are they in bed? What do they like?)

You're going to need a safe word, because he's aggressive. He desires total and absolute control, and won't settle for anything less.

You're his free use slut—if and when he wants you, you had best be ready for him.

He'll curl his hook around your neck and his hand around your waist to pull you back against him, let out a slow breath against your neck as his slips your clothes down your shoulders to lay in a pool at your feet.

Or simply rip them away from you, pressing against you to ensure you feel the hard heat of his arousal straining against his clothes, throbbing against your ass and your lower back.

Tilting his head down to ensure you both feel and hear his low, commanding growl in your ear.

"You're mine. Aren't you, my little whore?"

Whether he leads you by the edge of his hook to the privacy of your bedroom he simply bends you over his desk is entirely at his whim.

Either way, he's going to do little more than pull your panties to the side before he thrusts straight into you and fucks you relentlessly.

He's selfish, his main concern is mostly his own gratification—but he still has some concern for yours.

He does love the sound of your breathless moans, after all. Your cries of abandon are music to his ears, and there's nothing more intoxicating than the feeling of your pussy tightening up and pulsing around his cock as you fall limp beneath him in the wake of release.

Pulling you right back up by your hair before you've recovered, hearing your breath catch in your throat.

He lives for it, growling in your ear as he tightens his grip around your tender flesh, pinching and rolling one of your nipples between his thumb and forefinger, his lips curled into a cruel smirk.

"I didn't say I was done with you, slut."

He has no intention of stopping until he is done, until he's fully satisfied—whether that means making you cum until you pass out or cramming his cock down your throat until you're choking on his cum, it doesn't matter.

Either way, he always gets what he wants.

Y — Yearning (How long will they pursue the person they're interested in before losing interest?)

Not long, in most cases. He can just throw money and gifts at most women and get the gratification that he's after out of it.

He's going to be more interested, and honestly more likely to pursue, if you can't be bought.

If you're interested in more than what he can provide for you on a material or physical level, he's going to be intrigued. That's not something he's used to.

In that case, he very much enjoys a good game of cat and mouse. He'll want to find out exactly what makes you tick, and he's going to persist until he does find out.

He'll likely be courting and fraternizing with other women at the same time initially, but he'll push them away in a heartbeat if you engage in the game and show interest.

He'll probably still throw money and gifts at you, as that's what he's accustomed to doing—but he'll make a point of learning about you, and make the gifts more personal, more in line with your interests and passions, to ensure you know he's paying attention.

He still won't wait for too long. The whole hard-to-get shtick is fun for a time, but he will move on if it begins to seem to him like he's being strung along. If he isn’t the one in control and he feels like he's being played a fool, he'll cut his losses without a second thought.

Z — Zen (What do they do to wind down and relax? Do they prefer to do it alone or with you?

He doesn't have much time for rest and relaxation, so he values it immensely—and he absolutely requires your presence for it.

Even if he doesn't show it most of the time, you're his solace, his peace, the one thing that warms the cold and calculating persona he has to keep up almost twenty-four seven.

If he's reclining back with a glass of bourbon and a cigar, he wants you there. He needs you there.

Reclining back against his chest, his thumb brushing circles against your waist, trailing delicate patterns over your hand as he lies his head back to slowly exhale a plume of smoke.

Lowering his head back down to admire the sight of you, to brush your hair behind your shoulder and murmur in your ear.

"Get comfortable. You're not going anywhere until I say so."

#one piece #crocodile one piece #sir crocodile #crocodile #sir crocodile one piece #one piece anime #one piece manga #crocodile x reader #sir crocodile x reader #headcanons #one piece headcanons #fanfiction #one piece fanfiction #smut #fluff

[scribbledghost]

Something New

Pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x Reader (gender neutral, no Y/N)

Rating: M

Word count: 3,180

Warnings: non-explicit smut, d/s undertones, sub!Simon kind of, mention of previous torture (if you've read the comics, you know already), collaring, Simon gets overwhelmed by praise :(

Note: Had this idea bouncing around in my head for weeks now, and finally decided to sit down and write it. Please note that there is no explicit smut in this one, but it is mentioned and there is some spice. Depending on the reception for this one and the demand for it, I may write a part 2 that's more explicit. Tagging by request: @sillylittlereader

For as much as Simon Riley prides himself on being able to read others, you've noticed that he has a tendency to forget that you can read him just as well. 

"Simon, could you come here for a second?" you call to him from the kitchen one late afternoon.

Almost immediately, you hear the soft padding of his footsteps, a stark contrast to how one would assume he walks, given his size. 

"Yeah, love?" he asks as he comes to a stop behind you, both hands resting themselves on your hips.

"If I ask you something," you say, turning in his light hold to face him and lean back against the kitchen counter, "do you promise to give me an honest answer?"

"If I can."

You nod with a small smile. You know - have always known - that there are certain things Simon can never reveal to you. This is not one of those things.

At least, you hope it's not.

"Why have you been so nervous lately?" you ask softly into the space between the two of you.

He pauses.

"What d'you mean?"

"You've been... fidgety lately," you explain, loosely placing your arms around his neck, "quiet. Quieter than usual, I mean. Like you've got something heavy on your mind. If it's something with work, I understand, you don't have to tell me. I just want to know if it's something I can help with."

Another pause, this time much longer. Simon's eyes flicker across your face, as if he's searching for something. 

You're not sure if he finds what he's looking for, but he offers a partial answer nonetheless.

"It's not about work."

"What's it about, then?"

This time, he takes a deep breath.

"I want to ask you for something," he says, "but I... I don't want to scare you off."

Your brow furrows. It's not like Simon to be tentative like this when it comes to asking for something he wants. Especially if it's you he's asking.

"Why would you scare me off?"

"It can be... a big ask. For some people."

He's still hesitant. Reluctant. 

"Okay," you begin, trying to think of some way you can ease him into admitting what he's after. "How about this, then: I'll try to guess what you want to ask me. How about that?"

"Don't think you'll be able to, love, but sure. Give it a go," he says, a quick huff of a laugh leaving him.

"Do you want to hurt me?"

His demeanor shifts on a dime.

"What?" he asks, a quiet panic lacing his features as he rears back from you. "Christ, no, of - of course not, I -"

You place a soft hand at his lips to quiet him. You had known this would be his reaction, but you still needed to get it out of the way. You already know Simon's worst fear is hurting you - either intentionally or not. 

"Do you want to hurt someone I care about?" you ask, your hand still at his mouth.

He keeps his lips shut, but quickly shakes his head in a "no" pattern.

"Then I can't think of much else you can ask for that would scare me away," you say, removing your hand. Simon seems to relax somewhat, but you can still feel the tension radiating from him.

"Simon, the worst I can say is 'no'," you offer, reaching up to tilt his head forward so you can rest your forehead on his, "I'm not going to judge you. And I won't run away from you."

The silence stretches once more. Simon's hands tighten and loosen on your hips, as if he's squeezing them for comfort. Then, after several moments, he sighs.

"Okay," he breathes, then leans back. 

He reaches into his pocket, pulling out his phone and opening it before staring at the screen in front of him. He takes another deep breath, then turns it for you to see.

"I want to ask you for this."

Whatever you could have predicted would be on the screen would have been wrong. 

Because on Simon Riley's phone, staring you in the face, is an online listing for a collar. 

And it's not one for an animal.

It's a simple thing: plain black leather, thickly cut with a silver buckle and silver ring at the front. Nothing fancy, nothing extravagant. Had the listing not specified what it was for, you would have been forgiven for assuming it was for a very large dog.

In your shock, you forget to immediately respond until you notice regret begin to roll off of Simon in waves. 

"And... do you want to put this on me?" you ask before he can pull away and tamp down the shame you know is growing in his gut.

He swallows thickly.

"...No."

Ah. There it is. The crux of the entire issue, the reason why he was so hesitant. Simon has long since had the tendency to tell you that he is yours, that you own him - especially during more emotionally-charged and intimate moments. But you weren't quite aware of the extent to which he had apparently meant it.

There are some details Simon has revealed to you over your time together about his sexual experience. How there was a split in him - before he was tortured in Mexico, and after. Before, he'd had a few encounters, mostly quick flings or one night stands in which it was rough, fast, and little else. He'd always been the more dominant one, the one who took the lead. It came naturally, and he was still that way now, to a degree. But he had always done his best to ensure his partner for the night left his bed satisfied.

And then there was after Mexico. When his desire completely evaporated, nearly to the point of repulsion. One night stands were exceedingly rare, and any sort of meaningful connection was a thing of the past. On the wildly rare chance that he became so pent up he couldn't handle it on his own, the encounter would border dangerously on violence; solely focused on him and his need to get off. He didn't bring them home, didn't care for them afterwards, didn't even bother to learn their names. And every time, he'd feel the guilt crawling up his spine the next morning.

It had taken him time to work through his trauma. To give up his need to completely control and dominate his lovers because that control had been so thoroughly and viciously ripped from him in Mexico.

He is gentle with you. So afraid to hurt you that you remember the first time he had accidentally left bruises on your hips from gripping you too hard. He had refused to touch you for a solid week afterward until you had managed to convince him that it had been an accident and that it had done no lasting damage.

But there is still the fact that he is more comfortable taking the lead. More comfortable being in control, even if that control only goes as far as soft touches and gentle commands.

Now, here, Simon stands. Requesting that you take his control from him.

It will take careful, meticulous navigation. A step too far and you know he will yank back and close off from you. 

You can't quite think of what to say to assure him you're willing to take on the responsibility he's offering you, so you settle for pulling him in for a soft kiss.

And another.

And another.

"Go ahead and order it," you murmur against his lips. "We can talk about the specifics once it gets here."

He takes you to bed, then, settling you on top of him and giving you a taste of what is to come. When he reaches his peak later, he breathes your name against your mouth and tells you again that he is yours.

----------------------------------------

The collar arrives in the mail a week later.

Simon has been watching the tracking updates like a hawk, even going so far as to meet the delivery driver outside when they stop. He brings the box to you, sitting next to you on the couch as you open it. He puts an arm around your shoulders and pulls you close as you cut the tape and pull the contents free.

The collar is much the same as the one he showed you last week - thick black leather, with a silver loop. It has a nice weight to it, but doesn't appear to be too heavy. Completely average and standard. 

Except for one detail.

Off to the side, next to the plate that attaches the ring, is another silver plate. It's small, not overly loud and noticeable, but the shine stands stark against the leather. On it is an engraving of a series of letters.

It's your initials.

Your head swivels to Simon once you notice it, and a serious gaze greets you in return. The two of you stare at each other for a bit before Simon leans in and nudges his nose against your temple. He presses a kiss there, then rests his forehead in its place.

"I can return it if it's too much," he offers. "Get a plain one."

"No," you blurt out, "no. You don't have to send it back. I… I like it. Just wasn't expecting it."

Once again, you are brought to terms with just how much Simon means it when he tells you that you own him.

He hums lowly in response, and gently takes the collar from you. He pulls back, running his fingers along the material as he inspects it.

"Got a nice weight," he says. "Bit stiff, but that should be an easy fix."

He tugs at the ring on the front, seemingly pleased that it appears sturdy enough for his liking. 

"Now you can really get me where you want me."

He speaks softly, as if he doesn't realize he's talking out loud. Maybe he doesn't. But his words still send heat crawling up your face.

He hands the collar back to you, hands brushing against yours as you take it from him.

"So," he says. "Specifics."

Ah. Right. 

Specifics. Expectations. The ground rules that need to be thoroughly discussed before this goes any further.

"How often do you want to wear this?" you ask.

"Not all the time," Simon answers. "Just… just when I ask for it, yeah?"

You nod in agreement.

"And uh… I want you to always be the one that puts it on for me. Seems right that way."

Some type of emotion that you can't quite place begins to constrict your chest as you nod again.

The conversation continues, both of you setting guidelines and limits and requests. He does not want you to be too forceful, does not want to be completely helpless. He does not want you sickly-sweet and condescending, but does not want you cruel and angry, either.  He wants a softer type of domination, a light pushing of his comfort zone without it being further than he wants to bend. 

You are willing to give him all of these things, and more should he request it or discover he enjoys it in the moment, provided one stipulation:

He tells you immediately if anything feels wrong.

No second-guessing himself, no guilt at stopping the activity. As soon as the thought enters his mind that something doesn't feel right, he is to tell you. A safe word is established - the standard traffic light analogy - but you make it clear you will also accept any variation of "no", "stop", "don't", or anything similar. 

This is new, uncharted territory for the both of you, and you want to ensure Simon does not come away from this with a sour feeling on the matter.

"Do you want to try it on now?" you ask softly when it seems the proper details have been discussed. "Or would you like to keep it for later?"

He goes quiet, eyes flickering down to the collar you still hold in your hands before returning to meet your gaze.

"Now."

You nod and stand from the couch.

"Come on then," you say, "grab a chair from the kitchen table and meet me in the bedroom."

He obeys without a second thought, placing the chair in the middle of the room for you to sit in. It has no armrests, allowing you to spread your legs wide enough for him to kneel between them as he looks up at you.

"Do you want to touch me?" you ask. When he only nods, you lean closer to him, placing the hand that is not holding the collar on his jaw as you run your thumb across the scar extending up his cheek.

"Words, Simon," you say softly. "Gonna need you to answer my questions with your words if we're gonna do this."

"Yes", he breathes as he leans his head into your touch, "wanna touch you, love."

"Go ahead, then."

He reaches up and rests his hands on your legs, just above where your knees are bent. He runs them up your thighs slowly, blinking slowly at you.

"Tilt your head up for me, my love," you murmur as your fingertips rest beneath his chin. "Present yourself for me, and I'll put your collar on for you."

He raises his head, eyes still on you as he bares his throat to you. 

Even now, his gaze holds an undercurrent of trepidation. He is still analytical, still holding onto the thread of unease that is wound through him at the idea of showing such vulnerability. He trusts you, you know he does or he would not be in this position at all, but you also know he is still wrestling with his instincts and with the shadows of his past. 

"It's okay, Simon," you soothe, "if it's too much, we stop. We can always try again later if you want. This is about you, darling."

He swallows, taking a deep breath and nods. 

"Okay," you warn softly, "I'm gonna put this on now."

Simon inhales, filling his lungs slowly as you take the collar in both hands and place it around his neck. You watch as his eyes slip closed while you thread the leather through the buckle and up to the second tightest notch in the material.

He winces, a small and almost imperceptible movement.

But you see it.

"Too tight?"

"Just a bit."

You loosen it, this time going a few notches wider before you thread the pin.

"How about now?"

He hums quietly, eyes still closed.

"...Too loose."

Once again, you adjust, threading the collar so it sits snug against his neck, but you can still fit your fingers between the leather and his skin with little effort.

"Better?"

You watch as Simon's shoulders fall, releasing their tension in time with exhaling the deep breath from his lungs. Slowly, he opens his eyes, staring at you as he gives you a rare, soft smile.

"Perfect."

You return his grin and bring him closer for a kiss, feeling as his hands slide up to your sides. Your hands find purchase in his hair, pulling him in to deepen the kiss. He accepts the air from your lungs, the quiet sighs you give him as he slips his hands beneath your shirt to grip your skin. 

One of your hands snakes away from his hair and towards his neck, running along the collar and tracing the metal plate on it that bears your initials.

"You really are mine, aren't you Simon?" you ask softly.

"Yours," he breathes in between kisses. "All yours."

You shift your hand to the silver loop dangling from the collar and thread a couple of fingers through it. You pull away slightly, then tug on the ring to force Simon to follow.

The groan that erupts from his lungs is pure lust dipped in sin. The hands on your sides tighten their grip in surprise, then slowly release their tension as Simon gazes up at you.

"So good for me, Simon," you murmur, tracing the scar by his lip, "always so, so good to me."

You watch as his eyes tilt upward, and for the first time since you've known the man, he preens. 

You realize, then, that this is what he wants. What he needs.

To be good for you.

To be worthy of you.

He already is, of course, but under any other circumstance he would never believe you if you said as much. But here, with him looking up at you as you have him collared and bound to you, you finally have the power to make him believe it.

"So good," you repeat, almost absentmindedly as you pull him in by the collar to kiss him again. "So perfect. So much better than you ever give yourself credit for."

He grunts, sharply inhaling through his nose as his grip on you tightens again. When he breathes your name in quiet warning, you only offer a gentle shush in return.

"I know you want to tell me I'm wrong," you say against his lips, whisper-quiet. "Don't. Don't fight it, Simon."

You look into his eyes as he heaves a shaking breath, the warm brown irises beginning to well over with tears Simon refuses to allow himself to shed. He clenches his jaw, eyelids slamming shut as exhales through his mouth.

It's too much.

"Do you want to stop for now?" you ask gently, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "It's okay if you do. This is new, and I know it's probably a lot."

He pauses, contemplating his actions before giving you a miniscule nod. You kiss him once more, moving your hands around to where the collar is buckled against his throat, but before you can do so you feel a pair of hands lightly grab your wrists.

"Not yet," Simon mumbles into the space between you. "Just… just a bit longer."

You give him a soft "of course" as you pull back, leaving the collar where it lays  as you stand from the chair. You help him from the floor and over to the bed to sit, letting his hands guide you to where he needs you in this moment. It is now your turn to stand between his legs, thick arms wrapped around you as Simon tucks his head against you and takes several deep breaths.

In due time, you will extract yourself from him and suggest something for dinner. You will make sure he is fed, hydrated, and comfortable, and when he is ready, you will remove the collar for him and tuck it away close by until he next asks for it. You will discuss what just transpired, picking apart what he wants more of and what he can do without in the future.

But for now, you stay with him. Allow him to hold you close as you cradle his head to your body. 

And you take solace in the fact that you are his just as much as he is yours. 

#simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #simon riley x you #simon ghost x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #ghost scribbles

[ineffable-suffering]

Trauma-Dumping on your plants: The Anthony J. Crowley Chronicles

This has been living in my silly head rent free for so long, I finally decided to slap it on here in hopes of thinking about it a little less (than three times a day. It's been years. I need to get over it.)

Also, I'm absolutely certain I'm not even remotely the first person to realize or post about this, since it's not the hardest of parallels to figure out. Alas, I still shall, because out of mind, out of sight and all that. So:

Let's talk about how Crowley is using his houseplants to work through his own Trauma of the Fall. Or, well, maybe not work through it per se, but more so roleplay it to give it somewhat of an an outlet because he never got over it. Lol.

It's not rocket science to figure it out and God Herself actually gives us a pretty spot-on explanation of it in her own narration.

Crowley's plants are perfect. They're, as God Herself tells us, the most luxurious and beautiful in all of London. He takes great care of them, waters them, mists them. Does any and everything to give them the perfect conditions so they won't have a worry in the world.

And yet, we're immediately shown that despite the seemingly perfect conditions they're living in, Crowley's plants still get *gasps quietly* spots. And we all know how Crowley feels about that:

It seems like such an unnecessary tiny thing to get upset about, right? Like, plants get spots all the time. They're not perfect, they're part of nature and nothing is ever perfect in nature. Crowley would know that by now. Imperfection is the whole point of nature. If everything had stayed exactly the way it always was, nothing would have ever changed or evolved.

Besides, Crowley is a demon. If it were merely about aesthetics to him, he could easily miracle away any spot with a blink of his serpent eyes. But he gets so angry about it, it's almost comical. At first we think it's just to show us, the audience, that, in contrast to Aziraphale, who cares very dearly and lovingly for his books, Crowley is a mean, mean demon who, instead of being outwardly nice to the things he loves (like Aziraphale does), yells at his plants because he's a mean meanie.

But! If you look at the whole scene and what God says, it's pretty obvious what he's actually doing is something else entirely: "What Crowley does is he puts the fear of God in them. Or, the fear of Crowley. The plants are the most luxurious and beautiful in London. Also the most scared."

Folks, this man dude serpent is literally roleplaying the concept of God/Heaven threatening angels with their Fall in order to keep them obedient ... with his houseplants.

Have I mentioned yet that I am absolutely obsessed with him and also desperately wanna get him a therapy voucher?

Because what does he do once he sees a plant disobeying his rules of perfection and acting out? The same thing God did to her questioning, equally disobedient angels (including Crowley): Parade it in front of the very scared rest, making an example of it ...

... only to then, well ...

... quite literally chuck it out.

To anyone else, this seems like a completely ridiculous thing to do over a tiny, minuscule spot. There would have been a bunch of other ways to go about fixing that spot.

Figuring out what it was the plant needed that might not have been given to it yet.

Taking care of it in a different, individual way so it would have been able to thrive again.

Listening to the plant and letting it tell you why its spot appeared in the first place.

Telling the plant, that loves and relies on you entirely, you love it too, despite it not being without fault, despite of it not fully living up to your unreachable standards of perfection.

Caring for the plant not because you want it to be perfect, but because you're okay with it being imperfect.

(We're no longer talking about plants here, as you are probably aware.)

Alas, this isn't what Crowley does. Because it wasn't what God did, either. We still know very little about Crowley's actual Fall and the Fall of Lucifer and the rest. But we do know that Crowley was never like or even with them.

All he did was ask some questions. A tiny spot. A seemingly insignificant blemish in the luxurious, beautiful flora of Heaven.

And yet, before he knew it, he did a "million lightyear freestyle dive into a boiling pool of sulfur". Cast out, chucked away, just like his little spotty plant. And for what? Well ...

... to keep the others angels plants check, for the rest of time.

***

(Addendum from the comments: If we go by what the book tells us, Crowley doesn’t actually end up violently throwing out the ‚bad‘ plants. He just finds a different place for them and makes sure they‘re looked after. So much to him being a big, bad, meanie-mean demon.)

#botany over therapy #harvest the garden of your emotional trauma #its ok crowley just take my hand ill take you to a nice doctor #crowley #good omens #good omens season 1 #crowley's fall #he's not even close to ever being over it #which is understandable #ineffable trauma #the plants are a metaphore #my own meta

[irishmammonagenda]

hiiii ! ^_^ I love your writing sm

I was listening to music just relax, and randomly I thought of MC with "You're loosing me" AND I HAD TO SHARE IT WITH SOMEONE. Especially from minute 3:00 to the end 😭😭😭😭 imagine a fic inspired in that song with a traumatized mc after their death 🥲

hiya!! i'm so glad 🫶🫶🫶🫶 tbh i dont really listen to taylor so i had to look up this one, but oml it kinda does fit MC sm???!!!

honestly tysm for the ask, i don't normally write seriousish fics so this was a fun change grma <3

ALSO IM SO SORRY THE TITLES SO CRINGE I COULDNT THINK OF A GOOD ONE

Surface Tension- Obey Me x Reader

Summary: MC died 😱 and reincarnated as a demon, only their death affected them more than they thought. Word Count: 2.8k+ Warnings: Mentions of Death, leans more into Lucifer x Reader, especially at the end. (i am so sorry abt that I had no idea where this fic was going myself tbh) Descriptions of drowning. Hurt/Comfort? I have no idea how to write trauma I am so sorry, (this isn't apart of my 'Death is a Debatable thing Au) dividers are a mixmatch of ones by @plum98 @isisjupiter and @cafekitsune bc im indecisive

The thing you missed most were your pact marks. Intricate designs etched into your skin, that shone the colours of the people you loved, a reminder you were someone. You had something. A security blanket of sorts. Now they were gone, clear glass sin, almost poreless, uncanny replaced the lines and marks and humans´ perfect imperfection that provided a canvas for the hues that you were sure had painted your heart.

It hurt.

You fiddle with your hands, trying to contain the urge to just...pop. The horns and the tail had been disorienting to get used to. You still preferred your 'human' form, the only issue was controlling it. It would come with time, or so everyone had told you.

They told you a lot of things would come with time. You weren't so hopeful.

"I....it's just-" you flick your gaze around the room, looking anywhere but the demon in there with you. "...the dying part..."

"The dyin' part..." Mammon sits by your side, ever your first man, his eyes gaze at you, so loving, so adoring, it hurts your heart. "I don't understand the dyin' MC....I couldn't never understand the dyin'...." He brings a hand to rest on yours hesitantly, his false bravado nowhere to be found.

"I know you don't Mams..." You meet his gaze, his eyes as blue as the sky on a summer's day, warmer than the sun, and softer than silk when he looks into yours.

"It doesn' mean I won't try te....understand...I mean." He clears is throat awkwardly. "There's nothin' I wouldn't do for ye...not now not ever."

Your heart feels heavy.

Rushing water beats against porcelain. Steam slowly rose in swirls as the bathtub filled up. You fold your towels and set them by the sink beside the clothes you had set out. Pulling the satin robe that was a gift from a certain Asmodeus, you placed it on one of the hooks on the door, before twisting the taps to a stop. You submerged yourself into the warm water, your tense muscles relaxing as you leaned backwards in the tub from where you were sitting, legs touching the bottom of the porcelain. 

It had been so long. 

So long since you were able to just relax like this. You loved the brothers and the others, but sometimes you needed the solitude of your own thoughts. That wasn’t to say Asmo’s self care nights weren’t relaxing. 

You sighed. 

The water enveloped you, you had leaned back enough to where your head had begun to submerge. All was well. The water was warm, your muscles slowly relaxed, along with the rest of your body. Your eyes slowly blinked closed. 

All was fine. Your relaxed muscles let your head fall back. All was well. Your ears were now submerged. All was fine. 

Except it wasn’t. A switch had flicked. Your eyes shot wide open. You could no longer feel the bottom of the porcelain bathtub, panic and dread tugged at your arteries, squeezing your jugular. You flailed and thrashed your limbs, your head dipped under for a millisecond. 

Clear water turned murky. 

Your arms burnt after another weak attempt, head breaking the stormy surface of the lough for a moment; only a moment. Hardly long enough to draw a breath. Your eyes stung. Your throat ached, desperation choked at your airways. 

You found yourself submerged again. The currents slammed into rocks. Your hair rose upwards, strands sticking to your face like some sort of seaweed, hindering your vision as the waves flung you against hard rock. Your hands clawed at the stone, too slippery to catch a grip. The stormy water slammed you against another rock. You broke the horrid surface of the water, gasping and spluttering. Your throat burned like sinners in the 7th circle of hell. You just barely gasped in a morsel of oxygen before being dragged under by the force of the waves. 

You were slammed mercilessly into another hard wall of stone, your attempts at clawing for a grip so desperate you drew blood at your fingertips. 

You had survived demons, witches, angels. You had survived hell. Yet earth would be the one to take you out, so it seemed. You couldn’t hold your breath any longer, your mouth opened. You inhaled desperately, lungs aching for air. Water filled them instead. 

You gasped and spluttered. The surface of the water too rough to do a dead man’s float without risking your life further. The waves smacked you against hard rock once more, eroding at your hopes for survival. 

This was it. 

You were going to die. You’re drowning. You’ve drowned. 

The last thing you felt before you succumbed to the wild waves was the dull glow of your pact marks. With the last of your strength, you let out a silent scream, submerged by the water. 

You screamed. Frenzied hands pull your sobbing form out of the clear water of the bath pulling your soaked, sobbing form to their chest. You gasp for air, lungs burning. 

“MC! Y-you’re fine! Don’t worry…you’re okay…you’re okay…!” An uncharacteristically frenzied Beel holds you to his chest, massive arms enveloping you, he cards a gentle hand through your hair as you sob and upheave, your chest tight and your breath running from you. “You’re okay MC….follow my breathing…”

Hardly hearing him, you comply either way. Matching the breaths of the sixth born, your heart rate begins to slow, your breathing begins to even. Eventually, you sit wrapped in the arms of the Avatar of Gluttony, breathing deeply and slowly, your heart rate slowed, your sobs quitened to the occasional sniffle, the tightness in your chest remains. 

You chuckle humourlessly. “I’m sorry Beel….got your clothes all wet.” 

Beel shakes his head seriously, eyes on yours. “It’s never a problem. Not if it’s you MC.” He stands up with you still in his arms. Carefully, the redhead sets you down on your two feet. Strong hands on either side of you, a stabliser. “C’mon…let’s get you dressed MC…can you stand?”

Slowly you nod.

That night you found yourself in the living room, Belphie asleep, head on your shoulder. Mammon splayed across your lap, Asmo’s arm around your waist, Beel was on the other side of his twin, but held your hand, rubbing soothing circles subconsciously into your palm. Levi sat on the ground, switch in hand, cheek leaning against your thigh.  Satan and Lucifer sat on the nearest armchairs though they sat facing opposite each other, Lucifer half reading official documents, half watching the show his brothers and little human demon were watching, Satan doing the exact same, except his reading material was a book. 

You weren't sure how or if they knew what had happened an hour prior, but you were sure they knew this would cheer you up in some capacity.

You squeezed Beel’s hand, the knot in your chest coming undone just enough you feel light.

The transition from Human to Demon was a hard one to get used to, one thing that hadn't changed however; were the balls hosted by Lord Diavolo. The only difference being that now you sported curved horns on the top of your head. You quickly found that Asmo liked to decorate them with little trinkets.

Which he had done today, as well as helping you pick out your outfit for the ball. You gave a twirl in one of his full length mirrors.

"Thanks Asmo I love it." You smile, messing with an ornament on your horn. Those are taking a while to get used to.

Asmodeus laughs gleefully, waving his hand. "It was nothing darling. I'd love to do it again! Oh...~ You look so gorgeous...." He says dreamily before he turns back to his makeup, carefully lining his lips in a dark pink.

You blush at the praise before leaving the room, not wanting to risk being (fashionably) late.

"MC!" Lord Diavolo greets cheerfully, pulling you in for a hug against his bare, tanned chest. The gold in his eyes and horns glow like fire in the light of the ballroom. "I'm so glad you could make it! You look stunning!" He laughs, strong arms wrapping tighter around you.

You smile, "I'm glad to be here, Dia."

"I'm glad..." He says softer now. If the both of your words were an innuendo, neither of you pointed it out.

Barbatos appears silently at the left hand side of the Demon Prince, shaking your hand, you give him a sweet smile.

You barely get to greet him before the Demon Butler swiftly makes his way across the ballroom, and out of the glazed, oak door that led to a short corridor and then led to the kitchens.

After more peasant conversation with Diavolo, another Demon Noble had arrived, the scarlet haired prince pouted at the thought of leaving you before waving and making his way towards one of Hell's Aristocrats.

You wave him goodbye, you scan the Ballroom, eyes locking with violet ones. The seventh born gives a small smirk, lazily making his way toward you.

Belphegor had seen your dreams. He had felt the water pool into your lungs, the air escaping your grasp, the harsh bruising of the rocks you were slammed into.

He saw every dream, tried to stop them from reaching you. Sometimes he failed, your mind wanted to return to that moment. To pick it apart, to relive what it didn't understand itself, to find an impossible answer.

Sometimes your mind, your wonderful, horribly beautiful mind; would be too adamant, would loop back to it.

He didn't protect you. Not when he first betrayed you, not when he crushed your bones in his grip.

He couldn't protect you. Not when you were flung from rock to rock, sharp edges digging into fragile skin. Not when water burnt through your throat like fire.

He couldn't protect you. Not when your dreams bypassed his control. Not when the thin threads of your trauma induced nightmares slipped through the cracks.

The Avatar of Sloth could only do so much, yet, it never felt like enough. He couldn't protect you.

"Hey Belph!" You grin, closing the distance between the two of you. "You seem distracted, whats up?"

Belphegor snaps out of it, lips upturning. "Oh nothing, I just thought of something for the Anti-Lucifer League....What about you, MC, enjoying yourself?"

"For the most part yeah! But I haven't seen Mammon anywhere...." You say thoughtfully before deadpanning. "He's going to be strung up upside down by tomorrow morning, isn't he?"

"Yep."

Hours passed, a sleeping Belphegor had been handed over to Beelzebub, who was currently carrying his twin home. You were tempted to ask to join, but decided against it.

You weren't made of glass, you had agency. You could handle a silly ball.

Standing in one of the corners, beverage in hand, you'd elected to just people watch for a while.

Levi sat semi-hidden by a curtain at the grand window, switch in hand, noise cancelling headphones in, no doubt reaching the end of his social battery.

Satan stood at the other side of the Grand Hall, talking with contacts and connections you couldn't recognise. Golden blond hair perfectly in place. Asmo must've fixed it up for him.

Speaking of Asmo, he was on the dance floor with various succubi, giggling, smiling, and just in general being a social butterfly.

Mammon however, was still no where to be seen. Probably looking for treasure. Classic Mams. You smile to yourself.

Lucifer stood, being entertained by admirorers of all shapes and sizes. You stiffened.

Sometimes you forgot the brothers were Hell's Most Eligible Bachelors. It was easy to forget, seeing as you lived with them, and they were all idiots.

You could feel Levi's worried eyes on you none the less. Your stomach twisted with his sin, orange as a yolk, what came first? the chicken or the egg? You didn’t know nor did you care. Why would Lucifer choose you anyway? A weak human demon who couldn’t even survive a…-

You gripped your drink tightly, knuckles lightening. You took a sip, but with your tense muscles, the liquid burnt its way down the wrong side of your throat.

You spluttered.

Even the droplet. Even the sip. It grew, multiplied even, filling your lungs like goop, you gasped for air. The ballroom flooded a murky green. Stumbling, you pushed through the oak door to the hallway, where it was quieter.

Your heart beat out of your chest, your breathing was laboured, leaning against the wall, you lost your boyancy, dripping down until you sat on the ground, knees to your chest.

You stayed like that for a moment, catching your breath, engaging your senses.

Three things you could hear;

Idle chatter from the ballroom, completely muffled by the heavy wooden door and stone walls. Your own laboured breathing, although it was catching up to you. The blood rushing in your ears, evaporating from a rapid raging river to a small sparkling stream.

Three things you could see;

The stone wall, dark liath limestone blocks and bricks melded together, midievil in their design, they reflected the light of the overheard torches in a subtle, orange glow. The glazed panes of a glass window, the moon shone bright tonight, as it always did in the Devildom. You liked to think it was watching over you. Maybe it was.

If you turnt your head to the left, an archway was visible, a simple one. It dug into the stone wall and ceiling, pushing against the internal structures, standing out whilst holding together.

You continued your listing, smell and taste were ruled out, on account of you not being able to taste, and there not being any real noticable smells.

Three things you could feel;

The fabric of the clothes Asmo chose for you streched on your skin, the seams digging into your thighs where you sat on the ground.

The stone floor, hard and cold, even with the layers you had on, you shivered ever so slightly.

And lastly, you could feel the phantom ache of pact marks long faded, your heart heart, though it had stopped beating out of your chest. You felt calmer, more in control, yet still;

You sniffled.

After all; you didn’t have the best track record for keeping your head above water.

That’s how Lucifer found you. The door hissing open and his signature boots clacking softly along the ground announced his presence.

“MC, my love, are you alright?” He raises an eyebrow, The Avatar if Pride putting his aside and hunkering down so that he was more or less eye level with you, concern pooled in his expression. He reached a gloved hand out and caressed your cheek.

You nod, croaking out an "I'm okay now..."

"Are you sure, my darling?" The first born looks into your tired eyes, before tilting his head, asking for permission. You grant it.

He pulls you in for a hug.

"What upset you, dove?" He asks softly, rubbing soothing circles on your back.

"I-...I just feel like I've...like I've lost you all...and myself I guess...It sounds stupid! I know...but I just...-"

Lucifer hushes you, "Nothing you could say could ever sound stupid. He pauses. "Unless you're with Mammon...or planning something with Satan and Belphie."

That squeezes a giggle out of you. He smiles, tilting his head, a strand of raven hair falling ever so out of place at the movement, crimson eyes stare into yours.

"But that's not all, is it, dear?"

You mumble something unintelligible, but count on Lucifer Morningstar to hear it. "Have I told you yet? That you look absolutely gorgeous tonight, MC?" He asks in all seriousness. You avert your gaze.

He grabs your chin softly, "I'm serious, Darling. You're the best person at this ball, the best thing that has ever happened to my brothers...to me. Sometimes I feel you truly don't realise that...seems I must take care to remind you more often, my love."

You try to speak, but the air swallows up your words, your mouth open and gaping like a fish.

Lucifer's lips quirk up, he pulls you closer to his chest. You lean into him, giving a weak smile, ear pressed against his breast, listening to his heartbeat.

You felt calm; content even,

T he hug wasn't a fix it all. It wasn't some magic wand that had been waved, you weren't suddenly better. You were still traumatised, that emptiness, though dull, still ached in your heart, along with the places on your body the bright beautiful symbols of your pacts had been sketched onto your skin.

The hug was comforting none-the-less. Lucifer was impossibly gentle. He would cradle the ashes until you built yourself back up again in his arms, phoenixes need time to adjust before they can spread their wings, after all.

It would be hard. It would be so so difficult, so taxing, to rise from the ashes once more, to thrive again, but you had an army of idiots that loved you, who would go to the ends of the earth just to see you smile. It wasn't okay yet, you weren't 'fixed', you wouldn't be for a long time but you had years upon years, decades upon decades, centuries upon centuries.

i physically cannot write anything overly angsty bc im a wee softie smh this took me ages i am so sorry abt that </3 also i had another ask that i started planning out halfway through writing this and the contrast in the tone i was going for is so funny🧍‍♂️

#obey me imagines #obey me shall we date #obey me x reader #obey me headcanons #obey me mc #obey me mammon #obey me lucifer #obey me leviathan #omswd #obey me mc x lucifer #obey me lucifer x reader #obey me hurt/comfort #obey me fluff #obey me angst #obey me scenarios #obey me drabble #ask

[thatasadbitch]

𓇽༆𓇽I Want U𓇽༆𓇽

Neteyam Sully x Omatikayan oc/reader

Warning: light smut and Fluff, neteyam and reader are aged up

Wordcount: 1.8K

Charater: I use a name because it's easier for me to write but change it with yours or whatever you want, the character is female, daughter of two strong warriors of the Omatikaya clan, she herself is known for her dowry in battle.

( I accept requests if you have ideas I would love to hear them, I accept requests on Jake sully, Lo'Ak, neteyam, Kiri, Tsireya, aonung and Neytiri, all kinds of stories are welcome ;) write in private or in The comments 💙

and sorry for any grammatical errors but this is not my first language ♥♡

We had grown up in the Metkayina clan by now, I have a nice scar on my shoulder from the battle but I can say that I saved Nateyam from certain death.

Now I'm remembered as the strong warrior with the heart scar, I'm still not too used to the way of fighting of this water clan it doesn't come too natural to me even if according to Ronal and Tsireya I'm an excellent warrior also for this clan.

" how are you?" Tsireya asks gently looking at me from the water and leaning her elbows on the wooden bridge "Me? I don't know if I want to talk about it...Why don't we talk about you and Lo'Ak? Your love problems empty my mind" I say wallowing feet in the clear water next to her "ok...then it's pretty good apart from my mother doesn't agree too much on our relationship as always, she thinks Lo'Ak is reckless and that I should look for a serious man to mate with and marry" she snorts as she floats and looks at the sun kissing her skin " well I've been friends with the Sullies since I can remember and can confirm your mother's words Lo'Ak is reckless and reckless but he's a very good friend as well as I also think a great boyfriend, he's faithful, loyal and tremendously sweet and sensitive more than I want to admit and show" I say smiling softly to my friend "I don't know I wanted you know...to take the next step with him to connect, but my mother does not give me his blessing and not I feel like doing it behind her back I think she would kill me first and then the guilt "I look at her fake shocked" do you want to connect?! Know that after I want to know everything the first time is always crazy" I laugh and she splashes me with water giggling embarrassed " as if you two have never done " shrug " Neteyam and I joined our braids several times but we never we find ourselves too much in agreement on when to take the other step " she looks at me smiling " why don't we talk about you and Neteyam then ?" I roll my eyes and she giggles " I was going to kill him this morning about what Neteyam and I have different visions, he wants to recreate the stability of his family but I'm more of a solitary warrior than a mother of a family" I say throwing myself in the water with her "yes? " she giggles following me " I want to fight, it's my nature I was born for this I'm descended from generations of warriors but I know that sooner or later we should have children and I won't be able to be a warrior anymore like this... well I almost killed myself more than once i sometimes wonder why he chose me as his mate i'm so difficult and on the other hand i'm afraid to disappoint him i'm afraid i'm not worthy of neytiri as a yardstick she's crazy as a mother " she swims around me and laughs " but you want to take that step with him I can see it from your eyes, you two complement each other as Lo'ak and I complement each other, and if you want children you will do something else for a while, you will hunt and I could teach you something about a healer plus it doesn't mean that as soon as you do that you'll get pregnant you're 20 you have time for that you'll be a great mother because it's you you protected your own mate with your life you looked after Tuk and Kiri and thank God you kept an eye on Lo'Ak when or I can't, you're a bit grumpy it's true maybe you love being on your own, but believe me you would give your life for each of the people you care about and with them you change you are a mountain of sugar with them your eyes light up when you look after them to Tuk and when Nete shows you affection, you don't have to be Neytiri, you are you and clearly in everyone's eyes you will be a perfect mother and above all in Neteyam's eyes, he has chosen you as a mate because you are meant to be together and to be also parents together" I snort and go under the water " you know that taking care of isn't for me and yes I can't wait to do it with Nete and I thank you for those words I think they really help me these days, I love you Tsireya " I say with sign language hug her "Ali'iem you will think about it when it happens, continue with your normal life just take that step we all love you and we will be with you forever" we continue to swim and hunt together for a while and then I go back to the my tent with anc now the mind crowded with thoughts.

As I pull my wet hair back I see a red strand in my hair my eyes widen 'will this be a sign of Eywa?' "every day you are more and more beautiful you know that?" I feel Neteyam's delicate hand on my waist while his lips gently rest on my neck and I smile slightly " sorry if I was a bit stubborn and unreasonable with you earlier" I say, turning to look him in the eyes he smiles softly at me " we'll think about it if it happens right?" I smile back, infected by his , before giving me a kiss on the lips "sure" he replies "you know I think Tsireya and Lo'Ak will join for the first time it's a great thing for those two" he chuckles " it's an important step but Lo'Ak is completely crazy about Tsireya I knew he would get there and then she calms him down makes him think a little more and that's good for everyone" he giggles pulling his hair into a ponytail involuntarily showing me his muscles of his back tense, he turns his gaze catching mine passing over him "am I beautiful?" He asks teasing me "beautiful" I say giggling and he approaches me leaving me a few kisses on the corners of my mouth, I put my hands on his chest tracing the darkest signs with my fingers.

It's a moment that Neteyam hugs me more and finally he kisses me on the lips properly and I feel the need to connect with him " Nete..." I call him softly sighing Ali'iem ?" His pupils are wide and he looks at me softly but at the same time a shadow passes through his eyes, I gently stroke his face and I quickly reach his braid stroking it, he smiles and moves it to his shoulder holding it in his hand, I quickly do the same and bring my end closer to his connecting us, a moment of ecstasy that soon leads us to everything else, Neteyam rests his forehead on mine and squeezes my waist gently, I can feel he is holding back a lot he licks his lips, his breath is heavy and then he can't take it anymore and kisses my lips looking into my eyes "Nete let's do it..." I hiss through my teeth looking into his eyes "are you sure? " I nod letting him kiss me passionately, I have no more thoughts if not Neteyam.

He puts me on our 'bed' without ever detaching from me, our tails caress us and it's as if everything came from if we don't think too much concentrated on both our sensations and those of the other, I perceive his ecstasy, his love and his wish .

It doesn't take long that our intimacies are connected giving a feeling and sensations never experienced before, the slow but decisive movements of his pelvis make me feel an intense pressure in my lower abdomen, the deep and hoarse grunts of neteyam do nothing but increase this sensation that makes small noises of pure pleasure come out of my lips.

When his hands squeeze my thighs bringing them higher and resting them on his shoulders making me see the stars with a stronger push than the previous ones, my hands squeeze his back scratching him slightly.

The rhythm of his thrusts doesn't waver and I feel that feeling of pressure inside me about to burst "Nete...I..." I don't have time to say much because that pressure explodes completely making me scream nothing but his name which I he too says my name several times feeling my walls tighten around him, a feeling of burning heat floods me and then moments of silence where only the sound of our breaths makes noise in the air, I see him smiling above me looking at me with slightly tired eyes and a few drops of sweat on his forehead.

From a tender kiss on my leg before letting them both fall snugly around his slim waist, he kisses my lips multiple times before framing my entire face with soft comforting kisses, my legs still shaking.

We don't separate our braids nor our bodies but the guy above me switches positions letting me doze peacefully on his chest, while he watches me rest I hear the rumble of his purr on his chest which also starts mine letting him kiss his chest and her soft lips "hey…Ohe see ngenga and you are the best woman that could happen to me whatever happens I will always be with you" he says moving a strand of hair from my damp forehead, I smile at him tenderly "Ohe see ngenga too, and yes I think you won't get rid of me that easily either.” I rest my chin on his chest as I watch him already fantasizing about something I'll have the pleasure of discovering later.

𓇽༆𓇽

The next morning my legs were screaming in pain but this didn't relieve me of my duties, as always I met Tsireya taking a bath together " Ali'iem you are really slow this morning you won't take anything so" she will try again " Tsireya give me peace my legs they're screaming in pain "she whips her head towards me" you? You? Have you taken the step? You've mated tell me yes please I can't wait to see little puppies of the forest with your big emerald eyes " she takes my hands all too excited " yes yes we did but I don't know yet if I'm pregnant we'll just find out further on " she dives in and caresses my flat belly and I see her gesturing under the water a ' great mother make it a girl ' I giggle seeing her return to the surface " you are impossible you know ? Really embarrassing " she squirts me but whatever happens i can't keep a sincere smile off my face i have no more worries i just want to be with Neteyam forever " anyway me and Lo'ak bonded " i open my mouth in shock as she swims fast away from me“ COME HERE YOU MUST TELL ME EVERYTHING“.

#avatar x oc #avatar x reader #avatar #na’vi x reader #na’vi oc #na’vi #neteyam x reader #neteyam #neteyam x oc #neteyam smut #tsireya #request #love u

[yuus-sentient-teddy]

"You're staying here."

A/N: Spoilers for Prologue, Books 1-6, and certain events. Sorry! I've had this story in my drafts for so many months. I hope ya'll enjoy it and please let me know what you think.

EDIT: I accidentally posted this while in the middle of editing and decided to still work on it while it was posted XD

". . . What? Hang on--"

"Calm down, we just need you to be our in-between in case the beast gets to us. Having you up here means you can get to the Headmaster faster--"

"Wait, stop. Stop." Yuu squinted at Leona, incredulous. "You could have one of your dormmates do that. Your dorm is based on athletics, I'm pretty sure whoever he is could get to the Headmaster faster than me. Not to mention, I'm a Beast Tamer, I should be going with you guys!"

"You're also magicless." Leona was mercilessly blunt with that fact. The words reminded Yuu of all the jabs of random bullies throughout the schoolyear, and they gritted their teeth. Before they could argue back, Leona said, "I'm not saying that that makes you useless, but let's face it: you're not going to survive that oversized house cat unless you can put up a barrier or counter a spell."

"I probably wasn't meant to survive a lot of things since coming here, but look what happened--" Yuu spread their arms out--"I'm alive anyways."

"It's probably because you had one of us or Grim with you," Ace said. "Dealing with the ghosts at Ramshackle the first night and every other thing after that, Grim. Fighting the Phantom in the mines, the three of us. All of the Overblots, a group of us." He was counting off each instance with his fingers, clearly not sorry for making a case against Yuu. "I know you're not thrilled about being left out of something as big as this, but without Grim, you're not going to be able to do much, let alone protect yourself. We can't keep an eye on you either, so it's basically better if you stay here."

He didn't shrink away from the look of betrayal and anger on Yuu's face and stood still when they marched up to him. "Okay, first of all, when have I ever asked any of you to keep an eye on me? Yeah, never. And second in case you forgot, I've handled myself pretty damn well when it came to random magic crap. I literally can't count how many times I almost got burnt by fireballs, impaled by ice, and struck by lightning by people that can't aim, and there are a lot of them at this school. Yeah, Vargas's 'catch-up' lessons helped with my speed, but my point still stands."

They held up a hand, stopping Ace from rebutting. "And if you're going to bring up Grim probably throwing out spells with weird side effects, don't. I've suffered enough curses getting thrown at me and potions being snuck into my food to get used to weird effects."

"Wait, people have been doing those things?!" Kalim's eyes were wide in disbelief and shock. "Why?"

Yuu half-heartedly tossed their arms, palms turning upward, as a form of a shrug. "Probably because they're assholes and I'm an easy guinea pig. If we're being a little pessimistic, it's probably also because no one would miss me. Magicless nobody from another world and all that."

"That's a horrible thing to think about!" Kalim cried. The Ramshackle Prefect was a helpful person and tried avoiding trouble the best they could. Not to mention, they weren't in line for something major like a merchant business or a throne. How could anyone want to trouble Yuu? (And how could Yuu think no one would miss them?)

"No surprise they'd think that," Idia mumbled.

"Hate to break it to you, but even if you got potioned and cursed a lot, there's still going to be something you won't be able to handle," Ruggie said. "I get what you mean, though. I got cursed and potioned a bunch of times before I started working for Leona and still a little after. At some point, you're more annoyed than bothered by whatever happens to you."

There were times he saw his freshman self in Yuu. Struggling to understand the lessons, having to bear with a handful of cruel upperclassmen or fellow classmates, left to carry out a difficult task on their own... he sometimes may or may not have been at the right place at the right time to offer help--in exchange for a favor, of course.

"That still doesn't mean you should throw yourself into a fight without knowing what could happen to you," he added, almost scolding.

"I know, but I still helped with the Overblots, didn't I? I think that's enough proof that I can handle being in dangerous fights," Yuu said, crossing their arms. Their sleeve got pushed up and a healing scar on the back of their wrist was revealed, which caught multiple eyes.

Savanaclaw and the Leech Twins remembered the cry of fear and pain when the Octopus Phantom's tentacle snatched their arm, right after they had stepped out of the way of a funnel of water. Octavinelle and Kalim remembered Yuu being sent flying after the Genie Phantom shot a spell that created a force upon impact. They would have hit the wall like a rag doll if Azul didn't catch them with wind magic. The VDC group members remembered them on the ground, twitching sporadically as one of the Hag Phantom's regular sized apples innocently rolled away like it didn't poison them through touch. (Deuce panicked so hard he summoned a cauldron to crush it even though just stepping on the apple was all that was needed.) And who could forget Yuu yanking their arm out of a nest of thorny branches that had been summoned by the Dragon Phantom? They had scars from thorns that got particularly stuck.

After realizing they were staring, Yuu followed the gazes and put their hands in their pockets as casually as they could.

"If you're worried about us thinking less of you, I assure you we wouldn't," Azul said. "There's nothing about the offer that you should be worried about. Again, it's not because your magiclessness makes you less valuable. It's simply letting you avoid another troublesome fight."

He didn't turn on the charm; no smiles or overly fawning words. He was dead serious and it made Yuu uneasy. Why did he want them to take the offer? Although--and this uneased them much more--it was starting to feel like most of the boys were conspiring to keep them out of the fight.

"After everything you've gone through, you pretty much deserve this. Don't worry about Grim, either." Deuce pounded his chest. "We'll be sure to bring him back in one piece."

"I. . . appreciate. . ." Yuu gestured vaguely while also feeling that 'appreciate' was a strange thing to say. They didn't appreciate being pushed out of something important without being heard, and they weren't sure how to feel about the unexpected concern for their wellbeing, especially at a time like this. "I appreciate you guys wanting to give me a break, but I really am serious about coming with to save Grim."

They saw shoulders slumping and heard frustrated huffs. "Listen!" they yelled, starting to feel frustrated themself. "I almost lost Grim once! I need to be there to make sure I don't lose him again. I know you guys can do what I can't, I've seen you all fight before, and I know you all will be able to handle what's coming, but I can't stand being on the side again! So, like it or not, I'm coming with. And why do any of you care about me getting a few scratches or hits from magic, anyway? It's not like it hasn't happened before."

No one responded.

". . . Guys?"

Finally, Leona clicked his tongue. "So annoying. I told you all it would've been pointless to do this."

"What's going on?" Yuu scanned the faces around them, noticing how uneasy Jack and Riddle looked, how Ace and Deuce seemed to have something to say, how irritated or hesitant everyone else appeared. Malleus approached them and they immediately noticed his brows furrowed in concern. "Tsunotaro. . . ?"

"Two night ago, we all shared a prophetic vision, likely similar to what you have been experiencing as of late. All of us were gathered together battling the chimera form of Grim in the same area as the current one. He casted spells that were beyond his usual abilities, including one that made it hard to breathe. Somehow, in the blink of a moment, you ended up alone with him trying to get him to come to his senses."

Yuu held their breath as Malleus said, "But then he opened his mouth and lunged towards you, and the vision ended. Forgive us for not telling you sooner. It is difficult speaking of someone's prophesied death and we did not want you to lose your confidence."

Multiple eyes carefully watched Yuu process everything he said. Some wondered how this would affect their character (Malleus admired them for their courage, considering their circumstances, and Ace liked them for their gutsy and surprising moments; hopefully nothing would change).

Others hoped that Yuu would relent and let the group fight Grim without them (Rook was regretful of leaving Yuu behind, but someone as special as them needed to be kept safe; Riddle simply didn't want to lose a dear friend).

And others prepared to rebut Yuu if they were still stubborn about going (Leona was mentally groaning and Vil shared his sentiment; aside from the Freshman Squad's reputation for having hard-heads, the two understood how much Grim meant to Yuu).

The Ramshackle Prefect started to observe them in turn with an unreadable expression.

Then they scowled. "You all realize how fucked up it is to keep that a secret, right? I mean, shouldn't I be told I might be walking to my death? Or is it--I don't know. You all think I can't make my own decisions?"

"That's the thing, Yuu. You care a lot about the people around you, and when it comes to Grim, you'd do anything to keep him safe. Even if we told you about the vision, I'm willing to bet you'd try to convince us to let you come anyway," Ace said. "You're right, it was fucked up to keep the vision from you, but we can't let you be so careless about yourself, especially since it's basically confirmed you might die."

"That cat has no idea how lucky he is to have a patient and caring person like yourself," Sebek said. "It wouldn't do for him to learn it through severely injuring you."

"And actually, none of us would be able to stand it if you got hurt or worse and we had the opportunity to prevent it," Ortho said. "You've done a lot already. Just this once, we want to handle this without troubling you."

Yuu silently stared at their Squad, mouth agape.

"When we found out you had gone with Epel and Hunt to find S.T.Y.X.'s headquarters, we seriously thought wouldn't see you again," Deuce said. "You gave us a heart attack with what happened in Scarabia. What you did then was unbearable."

"I know it's pointless to think about, but I sometimes worry over what would have happened if I didn't get my Unique Magic in time," Epel said. "Seeing that vision of Grim pouncing on you, though. . . it's made it harder to sleep at night."

"Frankly, the headmaster could be more considerate of you," Jack said. "Having to take care of Grim and being a Prefect can't be easy. Not to mention, what was he thinking tasking you with stopping Azul?"

He rubbed the back of his neck, looking to the side. "On top of being a little reckless, it makes it hard to not want to pull you back from any trouble."

"So, whatever you tell us, we're not taking no for an answer," Ace concluded.

The anger they had towards everyone for their audacity to keep the vision a secret was dimmed a little (just a little) by their friends' worry for their well-being. At the same time, the worrying made their heart tremble and throat tighten. They closed their eyes and took a deep breath. "You know, this whole time I was expected to be a stone wall. I forgot what it felt like to be cared about."

"Huh?" multiple voices chorused.

"What do you mean by that?" Deuce asked.

"Well, I was pretty much thrown into a lion's den and expected to survive it. I wasn't given much sympathy either by nearly everyone I met, especially during the first month." (A few of the boys internally cringed, remembering the hurtful words he had said.) "There's also the fact that most of the school consists of pricks who are self-absorbed year-round. It's not very comforting to know that if something happens to me, there's a good chance no one's going to give me a hand, except if it's people I get along with or people who can benefit from my suffering."

"I don't blame you for wanting certain attitudes to change, but you know as well as I do that you'll encounter pricks and predators anyway beyond the school walls," Vil said but not without some sympathy.

"I do," they said bitterly. "Look, I get it. I shouldn't expect the world to hold my hand or offer me everything on a silver platter. But--god damn it, would it have killed anyone or even any of you guys to have some sympathy? To be a little more decent?”

"I was able to bear the atmosphere of NRC for a while, but at some point, it gets so fucking tiring. A student population that can't be a smidge nicer unless they're beaten up or more upfront about their actual intentions." They shook their head, then made a derisive sound. "That's why I'm having a hard time processing this. I'm sorry, but I can't wrap my head around the fact that you guys, who come from Night Raven College, are actually showing that you care."

The corner of their lip twitched upward, forming a broken smile. Concern was visible on everyone's faces.

"Yuu," Ace said, "are you okay?"

". . . No. I haven't been okay since coming here, or maybe I wasn't okay before coming here and it just got worse. I don't really know."

They turned their face to the side, but it was too late: everyone saw a tear slide down their cheek. Except for Grim and the rest of the First Year Squad, no one ever saw the Ramshackle Prefect cry. It strangely made everyone concerned, and some reached out a hand.

"Yuu..."

"Prefect..."

They raised a fist to their face, as though it could stop the tears before they could spill. They took a slow, deep breath to calm themself, but they never let that breath go in fear a sob would escape.

"Yuu." A hand gently touched their shoulder. "It's all right."

They shoved the person away. They couldn't see who it was from the torrent of tears that suddenly spilled and blinded their sight. "It's not!"

"I was starting to believe people when they said I wouldn't be anything! They told me I was useless and dumb and a nobody. They told me I should've stayed a janitor because I couldn't do anything right. They'd try to beat me up for some etiquette I didn't know or for some stupid reason."

Insulting Yuu's parents and them. . .

Riddle noticed Trey setting aside a big cookie during preparations for the Unbirthday Party. It was for Yuu. Earlier that day, someone or some people had stolen their bag and stuffed it with crumpled paper and empty food wrappers. Their notebooks--thankfully still in tact--had been tossed haphazardly around the school and led to the field where the bag was left. Trey found all this out when Ace and Deuce returned to Heartslabyul dorm scowling. The Unbirthday Party went on as usual, and Yuu seemed cheered up by the cookie and receiving the honors of petting a hedgehog. Much, much later, Riddle caught a bully red-handed and dished out the consequences for breaking Rule #53: You must replace anything you steal. Sadly, it didn't deter other bullies from stealing Yuu's bag, but Riddle still punished whoever he could for breaking an important rule and troubling someone so undeserving.

Threatening to take a tooth. . .

Leona overheard a conversation while napping in the botanical garden. In between sleep and waking, he initially thought he was dreaming the times he overheard the servants whispering disapprovingly about him. What made him wake up was hearing plots to get Yuu kicked out. He couldn't be bothered to care what ridiculous crap the herbivores in the other dorms or his juniors in Savanaclaw got caught up in, but this was something different. Joke or not, someone had to step in before either party gets kicked out--and that's what he did, telling the students off for planning something ridiculous and highly risky (and glaring harshly when he recognized some of the students as members of the Magift Club). After the students scrammed, he settled back down to sleep and his mind wandered to Yuu. He felt a little deja vu when he thought how they needed a tutor to keep themself from failing (and Grim too even though that fur ball could pay to be less annoying). It would dig into his rest time, but he had an idea for what Yuu could do to make up for that. Say, help a certain hyena finish his given tasks quicker.

"It feels like I'm only here for people to use or take from. I keep wondering why it always happens. Is there something wrong with me? Was there some invisible sign telling people I was a tool that didn't need repairs? Was I cheap labor because I'm on the bottom of some hierarchy?"

Taking Ramshackle Dorm away. . .

Once, Azul came across a group of students playing 'keep away' with Yuu and their lunch box. For a moment, he was reminded of his child self, trying to get back a seashell from a couple of bullies who were tossing it to each other over his head and taunting his slowness. He snapped out of his memories when Ace, Deuce, and Grim entered the scene, magic ablazed and yelling. It wouldn't be the first time he would see this happen: anytime anyone picked on Yuu while using magic, their friends would come to their aid. (If Azul had to be honest, he envied the Ramshackle Prefect for having people like the First Year Squad look out for them.) But then, some time after his Overblot, he came across a couple of students on brooms waving Yuu's homework from their perch. The sight particularly irked him, but before he could step in, one of the bullies lost his grip and a couple of papers got blown away. The rest of the homework got lost when he and his accomplice tried grabbing the sheets. It all drifted onto the wet grass below or sailed over the trees, and the bullies, suddenly remembering they had something more important to do, left Yuu scrambling to salvage what they could. Azul wouldn't forget the Prefect's face when they asked, defeated, what he wanted in exchange for helping them with the missing papers. He neither wouldn't forget their face when they asked how he had been able to deal with being picked on so much. For once, he didn't feel the urge to strike a deal.

Using them for a plan. . .

When the high of partying in the desert died down, all Jamil could think about was how he would tell his family that he Overblotted and why. It churned his stomach picturing their horrified faces, and it was made worse when he wondered what the Al-Asim family would do if they heard that their heir had been caught in a dangerous situation by none other than the loyal best friend. What would happen to him and his family then? Amidst the inner turmoil, the Ramshackle Prefect and Grim were far from his mind until he and Kalim found them practicing for the VDC tryouts. A proper apology was due, but he didn't have one prepared. It didn't seem to matter to the two, though, as they acted like nothing happened. As though he didn't force them to "solve" another dorm problem right after Grim expressed not wanting to. When Vil Overblotted, he saw Grim rearing to fight while voicing how troublesome it was to deal with yet another Overblot. His eyes slid over to Yuu. . . and it was crystal clear they didn't want to deal with anything anymore. They stared at Vil's cackling, levitating figure with despair, eyes telling of exhaustion and mouth tugging into a grimace, a sign of reluctant acceptance. He tried to protect them when he could from poisonous spells--emphasis on tried, since he still had Kalim to keep safe--and afterwards, offered leftover food whenever Scarabia had parties.

"Was an Overblot all it took for people to see me differently? I can't control how other people act, only how I respond. All I can do is take things easy and forgive, but I don't know if I can keep doing it. It's just. . ."

Their voice trembled. "So hard to keep going when it seems like barely anyone wants to consider you."

Word spread fast around Night Raven College and it wasn't long before Vil recognized that Yuu was in a challenging position: they lived in a literal ramshackle dorm, had to live on a small budget, and were entirely new to this world. He had to hand it to them, they possessed quite the will and backbone. After all they experienced, he counted himself lucky that they warmed up to him rather quickly--which was why he noticed how tensely quiet they became the night after their friends snuck a bite of unknowingly cursed dessert. When asked, they told him bluntly that it was painful seeing food used like that. They were struggling to pay off lunch debts and it was made much worse when already broken windows broke a little more or parts of the roof had to be patched up after a short downpour. Vil could see a little hunger in their eyes as they talked of instances where they had to decide between repairs and eating dinner that night, even the next two nights. He didn't know about their struggles in the first place, but he nonetheless felt terrible about what he did and deeply apologized. For the rest of the VDC training camp, he ignored any footsteps that came from the Prefect's bedroom and headed downstairs, even as they made the floorboard creak loudly.

Idia sometimes thought about how the Prefect looked when they thanked him for listening to their rambles of all the anime they watched back on Earth. The two of them were sitting in Ramshackle Dorm's lounge, waiting for the next level of the game to finish loading, when he glanced over. Serene and distant, like they had recounted a fond memory. He thought back to all the isekai manga, anime, and video games he consumed. Some protagonists seemed pretty eager to be in another world, others were immediately wishing to go back home, but those who expressed homesickness did it in a cool way, like staring at a moon while sitting next to a best friend (he did remember reading fanfiction where it was more emotional, though.) None had a protagonist talk about something as mundane as the shows they loved to watch, let alone a protagonist who would talk to someone awkward like him. Didn't Yuu have their squad for these sort of heart to heart things? But they insisted that he was the guy they wanted to talk to; according to them, he was the most similar to the friends they rambled to about anime and would very likely 'get' what they would be talking about. Idia was simultaneously flattered and frightened: flattered because his expertise in the media was recognized and frightened because he was in a position reserved for those with high relationship levels. In fact, he panicked when Yuu suddenly got teary-eyed. The saving grace was the next level finishing loading and the characters getting thrown into chaos. The next time he came to Ramshackle Dorm, he brought with him some anime he thought Yuu would appreciate.

"And that's the thing. I don't understand how people forget there's more to a person than whether they have magic. There were times I wished no one had magic so they'd just shut up and stop acting like they're better than me or anyone else. It's like having magic is an excuse to be an ass."

Yuu sometimes joined Malleus on his nighttime strolls. Most nights they would be sound asleep, which was why he treasured the times they were awake enough to walk with him. The two talked about anything that came to mind: gargoyles, schoolwork, differences between Earth and Twisted Wonderland. Then one night, Yuu casually mentioned that many of the students were rather. . . unwelcoming. "Some of them act like I don't exist, but it's better than getting my homework stolen and thrown to the wind." He was surprised, but not unfamiliar with bullying from Lilia's recollection of cruel humans and various history lessons. He asked why. They shrugged, answering, "Probably because I'm low on the hierarchy. I don't have basic knowledge on magic on top of being magicless." When he said it still didn't warrant such behavior, they smiled sadly and replied, "Well, that's how it goes when you got something another person doesn't, and that other person just so happens to not really fit in a certain place." Later, Malleus was distraught to hear from Lilia that some of the students who were unkind to Yuu were of Diasomnia. The dorm was founded on the elegance of the Thorn Witch, surely the students would act with decor. But Lilia told him not to worry, he had a word with those students on being more open. But Malleus still wondered if there was something he could do. It turns out the answer was simple (even though it took place after his Overblot): hang out with Yuu during the daytime. They were a fellow student, were they not? So why should they be treated any different?

"Sometimes, I wonder if anything would change if I Overblotted. Would anyone wonder then why it happened and be nicer? Or. . ." Yuu let out a bitter scoff. "Would nothing change and people just see me more as an alien freak?"

They scrubbed the tears in their eyes. "Maybe I'm just a dumb ass and my Phantom would just eat me. It's not like I have anything else to offer it. God, what am I doing?"

The weight of what they had spilled for the past couple of minutes started crashing down like a crumbling shelf. They didn't want to see what the others' reactions were and continued to wipe their eyes with their hands and sleeves, even if there wasn't much to wipe. Their mind cycled through anything they could say to escape such an embarrassing situation. So sorry, I didn't know where it came from. Let's go back to arguing why I can't come with you guys to save my cat. He has been nothing but a pain in the ass, I should know, but he's become nicer and been my primary protector. He keeps insisting he'd protect me because he's the boss and I'm his henchman, and it's so endearing sometimes. And he's comforted me when I become so sick and just need someone to hold me--

"How long has this been going on for?" It was a gentle question. Yuu lowered their hand and found Ace and Deuce standing before them, the worry on their faces making their heart clench.

"A long time."

"Why didn't you say anything? We could have done something, you know," Deuce said.

Yuu shook their head. "This school runs on sink or swim. 'Losers don't have the right to complain.' And did you guys forget that we're freshmen? What can you guys do against the whole school? I actually talked about this with the school counselor and all he could do was apologize and tell me he'll put in a note for the headmaster."

Yuu almost laughed at the faces Ace and Deuce made. "I'm pretty sure I'm his first case for something like this."

"Still, you shouldn't just take everything lying down," Deuce said.

"I don't want to anymore, but I'm so tired of fighting. At what point can I stop?"

Yuu was once again seen under a new light. The viewpoint was different for each boy: from magicless outlier to honorary dorm member, notorious problem solver to exhausted errand runner, doe-eyed student to determined but kind mastermind, just to name a few. Yuu had laid bare wounds previously covered up by uniform sleeves, things they couldn't talk about or didn't feel comfortable sharing because otherwise they'd go against the school norm and grab negative attention to themself. Their closest friends knew of these wounds; others caught glimpses of certain parts. With the revelation, they all shared a similar viewpoint: an ordinary person so far from home, dropped into a magical, chaotic world and more vulnerable than what anyone realized. More exhausted and heavily scarred than what anyone realized.

"When Leona told me to stay here, I thought all along you guys didn't think of me as someone who could stand beside you and that everything had just been you all tolerating me." Yuu's voice dropped to a whisper. "That had hurt me more than any of you could know."

". . . Anyone who thinks you're undeserving of your position knows absolutely nothing," Riddle said. "Not counting your grades, you've proven yourself enough to have a place in this school."

Yuu gave Riddle a wobbly smile and he found himself feeling a little bashful. "Thanks, Riddle."

The smile suddenly became strained and they looked away. "I'm sorry. I know I said I took things easy and forgave, but--" they grimaced--"I can't bring myself to let go of some things you and the others did."

A/N: This accidentally became a two parter

#twst angst #yuu/mc (twisted wonderland) #riddle rosehearts #leona kingscholar #azul ashengrotto #jamil viper #vil shoenheit #idia shroud #malleus draconia #ace trappola #deuce spade #🧸🖊writing

[black-lake]

astro observations 9

hey folks, I found new stuff to talk about. this is more of an outer planets and generations obs 🚀

——

✮⌁ when uranus conjunct pluto happened during 1964, we saw a lot of rebellious music, fashion and other forms of expression, the beatles, bowie's debut album, twiggy, bob dylan.. etc. It was an important decade for many changes and revolutions. It's why so many people are still influenced by the art, music and appeal of that era. Even though it was a relatively short period, the intense need for freedom was loudly expressed that decade. I think with pluto in aquarius we may see similar events, but on a larger scale and with a far more lasting impact. 

✮⌁ neptune will move into aries in 2025, and boy when I tell you I can't wait, I terribly mean it. I think neptune in pisces wasn’t doing it for me, I had creative expectations for it but it was all about spirituality and faith practices on the internet and an unhealthy addiction to it. this was right after neptune in aquarius which we all know made the internet an addiction in itself. 

✮⌁ It had its positive impact, being open-minded about different beliefs, exploring our intuition and faith and other abstract topics. but we've already seen the negative impact. It's mainly the spirituality addiction on the internet that has became almost inescapable, replacing reality, practices performed and consumed by really young individuals which could distort their view on the world at an older age. living in an illusion and assumption of everything and everyone, believing everything you hear blindly, because of your or someone else's false sense of intuition will make the world more closed-off and less likely to evolve. it can create a reversed effect, inducing fear of real life interactions, closed-mindedness and seclusion.

✮⌁ with neptune in aries, we will come out of our shells and live in the real world, we will explore the world with a new set of eyes and a fresh sense of passion and childlike wonder. We're less likely to listen to our fears and other people's assumptions and bs. It's a new astrological cycle. Our collective hopes, dreams, fantasies and passions are reborn. Now especially when uranus moves into gemini, the same year, people will be more encouraged to become social and intimate, more fun talks and activities, I hope 🥹 this will also help fuel the inventive ideas pluto in aquarius brings with it.

✮⌁ y'all there's more to astrology than just money, success and fame. you can explore the world with that tool, thousands of things to talk about. there're topics that aren't given as much attention here. if you have something interesting and new you posted or you wanna talk about and are shy plssss just share it in the comments I'm all for ittt I wanna see it. 

✮⌁ last time pluto was in aquarius 1778-1798, there was an industrial revolution going on, the peak of "the age of enlightenment", the french revolution, and many other political revolutions. the battery, hot-air balloon and parachute were some of the things invented. uranus was discovered in 1781. fun fact, the airplane was invented when pluto was retrograde in gemini in 1903, which makes sense since it rules over flying and air travel, also uranus was in sagittarius which rules travel as well, so interestingly enough there was a uranus-pluto opposition.

✮⌁ when uranus moves into gemini (ruling air travel) and with pluto being in aquarius, we literally may see spaceship inventions or spacecrafts and rockets that will launch to space. we may even be able to travel to a certain planet or at least find something new about it. we may find creatures or living things in space. air travel may look different, hydrogen-powered planes, cleaner and eco-friendly energy sources. at the very least we may hear of new scientists, and keep up with them.

✮⌁ any outer planet in libra, is a timeline I'd like to skip if I ever lived in, which I won't thankfully. It's by far the least sign that has potential to bring evolution and advancement to a generation, excluding aspects, it just ain’t doing much. Idk what it is, but maybe people are less likely to do anything considered immoral or unaccepted, they're more likely to do things like pleasing the generation's expectations and opinions. It brings a sense of connectivity, an understanding of comprise to connect and relate to our environment, and a focus on relationship matters, which of course is a building brick to bigger changes like all the transits are. but for me, not an exciting time, ig it's why I'm born in neptune and uranus in aquarius gen 💀

✮⌁ many of us have parents that have uranus or pluto in libra, and tbf, they likely were closed minded, people pleasing or even racist at times. but our pluto sag ass knew how to deal with it. how many of y'all gen z's gave your mommy a lecture on lgbt+ rights and the people with other cultures and backgrounds? 🖐🏼 also butting heads over someone wearing something on the streets, I'm like "THEY CAN DO whatever they want, let them live" 

✮⌁ speaking of pluto in sagittarius, I'm a little underwhelmed. dgmw we made so many changes and paved the way for future generations, but moreso, perspective wise. I didn't see many tangible changes from this gen compared to pluto in scorpio, which was wild in terms of sexual expression, experiments, conspiracies, institutional corruption, societal and medical change. pluto in sag was kinda mild, we allowed everyone's voice to be heard, explored other cultures and lifestyles, probably have friends from all around the world, we're willing to learn and are open to all sources of knowledge, we're truth tellers and we won't shut up. I guess our mission was too easy for us.

✮⌁ pluto in sag gen probably have challenging experiences relating to higher education, college years may have been dark and even traumatic for many esp if you also have it conjunct chiron 🏴‍☠️ even our sense of belief in ourselves and optimism is wounded, we put on a happy front because we see a better future for the world at large, but not for us, like we're some type of teachers or gurus raising a child.

✮⌁ if you have pluto conjunct chiron, you may feel dismissed or misplaced. things can hurt deeply with this. this also may indicate some family karma that needs to be resolved. your ancestors may have done shady stuff that cost them a lot. you are here to change that and find the light that future generations will thank you for. you got the resources to do so since conjunction is the most beneficial of all. you got a lot of healing and transformative powers. since it's in sag, it may be about clearing up nasty beliefs and perceptions of people and the world, even harmful actions and disrespect towards different individuals. you're the truth-seeker that refuses to take on outdated traditions and beliefs.

✮⌁ pluto in capricorn gen understand the value of monetary resources because they experienced a restriction of it at some point in their lives. there's this feeling of restriction coming from societal rules or memories of such repressive time, which they may feel the need to go against and prove themselves by working and gaining more power. they know how to survive in times of chaos and make the most out of what they have. they may have goals of creating some type of legacy for themselves and future generations. also maybe capricorn ruling the skeletal system is why caps give the 💀🩻🪦🏴‍☠️ impression, sry I keep making jokes about y'all, but ya dgaf 🫶🏼

#pluto in aquarius #astrology #astro observations #astrology aspects #astrology signs #pluto in the signs #pluto in sagittarius #pluto aspects #pluto transits #neptune in pisces #neptune in aries #uranus in taurus #uranus in gemini #pluto in libra #pluto conjunct chiron #pluto in capricorn #uranus #neptune #uranus aspects #uranus opposite pluto #pisces #aquarius #aries #sagittarius #neptune in aquarius #pluto in scorpio

[ms-demeanor]

Hey! I appreciate your perspective on computer-based things. I think I need to get a laptop and would love your opinion on decent brands. If you don't have an opinion or want to answer please disregard the q.

Context: I'm often on the move and really want something small, light, and that will last a long time. I'm bad about buying new things or taking things to be fixed so ideally it's not something that dies quickly or needs frequent repairs. For a while I used an iPad for this but I need more of a keyboard than tablets have and the shelf life of an iPad is shorter than it should be for the cost. Mine is 7 years old and only works while plugged in... I liked my Macbook Pro I got for college but it's almost 15 years old and given I haven't needed a new one since I don't think spending all that on a Mac makes sense either. I use a gaming PC mostly but I'm going to need to travel a lot more in the upcoming year. I'm ok to spend up a bit since I want it to last.

I think you're going to have to adjust your expectations about the average functional lifespan of electronics. Seven years is a lot to get out of any tablet and fifteen years is way way way above average for a computer.

At work we estimate that the functional lifespan of a laptop will be around five years and the functional life of a desktop will be around seven years; we include upgrades in that lifespan, like adding RAM and storage.

It is not *unusual* to get more than five years out of a laptop or seven years out of a desktop, but if you are a heavy user of anything other than a browser and a word processor, that's about the time when you'll find that the computer feels slow enough to be frustrating. This isn't a hard limit, and it's not something that everyone experiences because people use computers differently, but if you're an artist and you use a drawing program that program will start to feel slow after a while because as updates and patches and drivers have been tweaked for newer devices they've slowly left your device in the dust.

This isn't planned obsolescence, by the way. Computer manufacturers try to "future proof" their devices to a certain extent, but you just can't anticipate certain kinds of changes. Maybe your laptop was manufactured before there were consumer SSDs available so its operating system doesn't take the advantages and limitations of SSDs into account. Maybe your desktop was built for DDR3 RAM and we're now on DDR5 and people aren't writing programs to the standard of the old technology, they're taking advantage of the standards of the new technology.

Since you were able to use your devices comfortably for such a long time, it sounds like you're not a very heavy user and don't need to worry too much about beefing up your specs. However it does sound like you want to keep your computer and use it as long as possible while paying a reasonable price for it (which is good! I think we should all try to extend the lives of our electronic devices as much as possible!).

I actually think you sound like a good match for a Framework laptop.

Framework is a company that makes laptops that are a lot more modular than what's on the market these days. They're mean to be easy to open up for upgrades and sturdy for heavy use. Most of the parts of the laptop are easily replaceable - including the screen - so you can use them for a long time and easily make upgrades that will help the computer feel fresher.

They're a bit more expensive than comparable PCs but much easier to repair if you aren't comfortable opening up your own computer (framework is intentionally built to be easy for people who are non-technical to work on their computers), and they are a LOT less expensive than comparable macs.

I still think you're probably looking at around 7 years of regular use out of a Framework and it won't *break* at that point, it will just. Probably be a bit slow and frustrating. You might not be able to get parts for it after a certain point. You eventually won't be able to upgrade the OS. But that's true of all computers.

I've still got my 2005 macbook. It still turns on, I can still use garage band on it. But it doesn't connect to the internet and uses such an old USB standard that it is extremely slow to transfer data on or off of and it cries and freezes if i try to use photoshop. It's not broken, it's just no longer useful as a daily computer.

What I'm defining as functional here is "Is able to run multiple programs (including at least one browser with 50+ tabs open and two office suites) at the same time for 8-10 hours a day without crashing, freezing, or losing data and restarting is not a major inconvenience."

In those terms, it does sound like you're probably in need of an upgrade (I can't imagine that your current machine is particularly quick) and I think that a framework laptop would suit your needs well.

If you're looking for something somewhat less expensive, you can generally find a decent thinkbook with a 12th or 13th gen i5 processor, 16GB RAM, and a 500GB SSD for around $700-ish, which is the low end of what I think you're going to pay for a decent laptop. I'm reccing lenovo here because I personally like them and have found them to be very easy to crack open for repairs and upgrades. Stick to the thinkbook over the thinkpad because that's the business line and is a bit sturdier and they are designed to be easier to upgrade over time.

Actually, here's a thinkbook with a 12th gen i5, 40GB RAM, and a 1tb SSD for under $700. That's a shockingly good price for that laptop; the reseller OEMGenuine is one I've purchased from many times before for work and I've found them to be reliable, though the reason those specs are so good is because they've added aftermarket parts, so your RAM and SSD won't be under warranty from Lenovo.

For Framework you're looking at at least $1000, but it's easy to plug and play with upgrades so you can start out with lower specs (except processor, don't cheap out on the processor) and upgrade later. The framework is a bit smaller and easier to travel with, but I have a laptop quite similar to the lenovo and it's not a huge pain to move around - it's very light but the 15" screen might be bigger than you're looking for.

If you're willing to spend a little bit more and you're very uninterested in doing your own upgrades and would prefer the most computer you can get for your money right out of the gate, this is a 12th gen i7 thinkpad with 40GB RAM and a 2TB SSD for $1150. (I've not ordered from this reseller before, so maybe check over their terms if you're considering purchasing from them.)

[bookishtheaterlover7]

Katherine’s horny thought was sent to you: 💌

Now share something short but smutty with this promt:

“Where have you been, sweetheart? I’ve been waiting for you.”

[No pressure bby.] 🤍

Sweetheart

a/n: Hey, Kat, and fellow Readers!!! So sorry this took so long, it's been an intense couple of weeks... School has just started, and I'm already feeling the pressure. But, I'm happy to have written this for us. It calmed me down, and gives me great pleasure (innuendo not intended 😆) to know that I am capable, and getting better at writing dirty smut 🤭

Anyway, I hope y'all enjoy this, as much as I enjoyed writing it. ❤️

Requested: Yes

WARNINGS!!! Talk of sex life, Steve being Steve, Dom!Captain!Steve, some possessiveness, some rough handling, major cursing, name calling (Y/n is called slut a couple of times), Smut with a plot, talks about sex and trusting your partner, MAJOR CUTENESS at the end.

DNI Divider by @firefly-graphics

Enjoy!

It all started when Steve caught the end of your conversation with Nat.

"And honestly, I wouldn't mind if things got a little heated, in a certain way with Steve." He heard you say.

"I mean it wouldn't be too hard. He's Steve..." You trailed off, the swoon clear in your voice.

Sometime later, you'd be sitting in the comfiest corner of your room, when Steve, flushed and barely able to catch his breath, bursts into your room. Talking a mile, a minute.

"Okay, Doll. I've been thinking. And you're right. Our sex life should be exciting. So, sometime soon, I'm going to do something that you won't expect. We cool? Okay, talk soon!" He finished before hurriedly giving you a quick kiss, and rushing out of your door. Leaving you more confused, than anything.

A few days later, Nat and Wanda had taken you out on a Girl's Night. It had become kind of a tradition for the ladies of the Avengers (including Pepper). Especially on days when either missions got too much, your S/O had left you at a loss, or just to decompress from life in general.

"So, basically if Tony is going to pester me about that paperwork one more time, Pepper is going to give him hell." Nat laughed, hands steady on the wheel of the car on the ride back to the Compound.

"Shame Pep couldn't make it." Wanda sighed, resting her head against her hand, with her elbow resting against the passenger side door.

"Having Morgan with us wouldn't have been too bad." She added.

"Everything we do is basically PG-13 anyway. Like Y/n's sex life..." Nat trailed off, the playful teasing tone at the end of her sentence evident in her voice.

"It's almost been a week, and still nothing?" Wanda asked, turning her attention to you, sitting in the backseat of the car.

"Nope. And he's been acting strange, all week!" You sighed, exasperated.

"Ever since he came bursting into my room, talking about how, I was right about our sex life needing a little more spice, and that he's got just the thing. But only when I least expect it." You huffed.

"I don't know... I know, I said that I wouldn't mind that we add more spice, but that doesn't mean that we have to. Being with him is more than enough." You said, eyes shining.

"Maybe you should tell him that, Y/N/N." Nat replied, reassuringly.

"Even Super Soldiers need a little assurance, every now and again..." She smiled, knowingly.

Wanda reached for your hand to give some more comfort, and the tension was lifted from your shoulders, almost like she used her skills to help you.

With your mind at ease, you were more than determined to assure Steve.

It wasn't long before you arrived at the compound, and separated yourself from your girls to head up to your floor. But when you got off of elevator, something was amiss.

Your floor's lighting was suspiciously dim. And it had you cautiously approaching your room. Which you were successful, until you shut your door.

"Where have you been, Sweetheart? I've been waiting for you." A gruff voice said from within the space, making you jump right out of your skin.

In a panic, you went to grab the handle but it wouldn't budge, FRIDAY had locked you in!

"I-I'm sorry. We were caught in traffic... I don't have control over that, Steve." You gasped, as your boyfriend's form prowled towards you, before pinning you to the door. So, close to you that every breath you took, caused your chest to brush against his.

"You think I don't know what you've been out doing all night, slut?" He hissed into your ear, pulling you flush against him, one hand teasingly rubbing up and down your hips and ass.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about, Steve..." You trembled, unsure how to act or feel, but undeniably feeling the unmistakable sensation of slick building up between your legs. Steve's complete change in persona had its desired effect on you.

"Oh, don't play coy with me, Darling... A little bird told me how you played and danced with all those men, while you were out." He smirked against your cheek, after placing a tantalizing kiss on it.

"Did you forget that your Captain is waiting for you at home? Desperate to feel you, practically melt in my hands? Are you that desperate to have something in you, that you'd deny him his right?" Steve said, intense lust-blown eyes boring into your soul.

"No, Captain. I'm only desperate for you." You cried, needing friction between your thighs, sooner rather than later.

"Prove it." He growled, before pinning you to your door, one arm holding you up against it, the other hand shoved between your legs. Spreading your walls around his thick digits, cause you to moan loudly.

"I see. My girl, is more than desperate for her Captain... You're practically dripping, My Dear..." He sighed, looking at your ruined center. His expert fingers rubbing and brushing up against your walls and clit.

"Oh... Captain, please..." You gasped, the pleasure building and building, desperate for release.

"Are you desperate for your Captain?" Steve smirked, his lips mere inches away from your own.

"YES! I FUCKING AM!" You cried out, every sensation turning more and more intense, and you haven't been allowed to come yet.

"Then come..." Steve said in a low voice, causing you to release it all, with a wail, as his lips came crashing down onto yours to swallow every cry.

He pulled away to kiss, and suck on your sweet-spot. Wanting to mark you all over, but also, as a way to ground you, and bring you back down from your high.

"Are you alright?" He asked, looking right at you. His eyes wide and gleaming, ever so soft for you.

"Y-Yes... I'm fine, just need a sec." You breathed, unable to believe what just happened.

"Do you want me to stop?" Steve asked, softly.

"No. God, no!" You exclaimed, gripping his shirt by the front and pulling him for a messy kiss.

"Take me to bed, Captain." You sighed, before he ripped your shirt in two, and carried you with one arm to your bed, where you shared another messy kiss once more. A promise of the long night that was to come.

You both finished with a roar, Steve tenderly kissing you, allowing you both to calm down, from your climaxes. He gently pulled out and rolled off of you. Walking into your En Suite to wash himself off, and prepare your bath.

He came back a few minutes later, gently picking you up, bridal style into your shower. Where he allowed you to lean on him, shaky legs unable to keep you upright for more than a few seconds.

His hands, gentle and warm, massaging your shampoo into your hair, lathering soap all over your body, and especially on your most intimate parts. You have never felt safer, or more loved than in that very moment in Steve's arms.

Once he had given your exhausted body a final rinse, he grabbed your fluffy towel, wiped you dry, wrapped you up in it, before taking you back to the bed where, he had a shirt all ready for you to wear. Although, you definitely noticed that he hadn't brought out your own pair of underwear, instead had his own loose boxers for himself.

Steve asked if it was okay with you to wear his shirt. You agreed, as he slipped it over your head, and around your body, the gesture just as intimate as anything you've done that night with Steve.

He carefully laid you on a carefully arranged pile of pillows, and went to put on his shorts, before joining you in bed, gathering you up in his arms, and snuggling into you. Knowing that this is probably your favorite part after sex.

Rubbing your head softly, you let out a contented sigh, before pulling back slightly to look up at him, determination in your eyes.

"Steve, what was this? I-I mean, you said you'd do something to spice things up, and that I'll never expect this. And I definitely did not expect to be dominated by my Captain. But this is definitely out of the blue, what's the matter?" You asked, your face full of concern as you lovingly cupped his cheek.

"You said that you wouldn't mind if things heated up between us. And I wanted to prove that we can do more than just the regular old making love." Steve sighed. Gone was the strong facade he put up, in its place, the young boy from Brooklyn.

"I did, Steve. But I don't want you to escalate to a place you're not comfortable with." You smiled, using your hand to keep his eyes on you.

"Sex isn't just about love, or getting relief from some sexual tension, it's about communication, and telling your partner, what it is you do or don't like. And that means, taking baby steps if you want to live things up in the bedroom." You said, with a smile.

"So, I could just tell you what I want to try, and you can do the same. And it'll be alright?" Steve asked.

"Yes, Honey. We communicate, and find out together what works or what doesn't. It's about you and me. I trust you, full-heartedly, Steve. Do you trust me, too?" You asked in earnest.

"I do, Doll. I really do, you make me feel complete, and I feel safe enough with you, that I feel like I can ask, and you wouldn't judge me for it." He grinned, his smile getting bigger and bigger.

"Good. Because that means we can try bondage next time." You laughed, half jokingly.

"Slow down, Sweetheart..." Steve laughed, pulling you closer to him. Both of you, happy to have moved up a step in your relationship, and content in the safety the other provided.

Hope that this was a good one!

Until next time!

❤️ Booky

Taglist: @nescavaneck @jiyascepter @royalwriteroftheuniverse @femefetalelevelingup

#katherineswritingsblog asks #chris evans #booky answers #chris evans fandom #chris evans characters #chris evans imagine #team chris #steve rogers #captain america #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers x reader smut #steve rogers smut #steve rogers imagine #booky's written works #chris evans smut

[starlingflight]

Ginniversary Drabble 8

Prompt: "I'll be in my bedroom, making no noise and pretending I'm not there"

AO3 or read below:

Not for the first time that summer, an argument had broken out over breakfast in the Potter household.

Harry resisted the urge to squirm under his daughter's fierce glare, so like Ginny's it was almost unnerving.

“Just because your life is so boring, doesn't mean you need to ruin mine!”

Lily flung the comment across the table with a look of triumph that made it clear she thought she'd found the worst insult imaginable.

Harry, however, let the remark bounce right off him. The corner of his lip twitched despite his discomfort only a moment before. ‘Boring’; The worst thing in the world to a child who had only ever known safety, security, and love; for him a privilege he was thankful for every day.

“Oh,” James’ mouth split into a delighted smile. “That was extremely disrespectful, Lils.” His eyes darted between Harry and Ginny. “Worth grounding her for another week, wouldn't you say?”

“Enough, James,” Ginny said firmly. She waved her finger decidedly between him and Al. “You two, out. We need to speak to your sister.”

James merely shrugged, eyes glinting in a way that made Harry certain he already had mischief planned outside the dining room, and no inclination to be separated from it any longer.

Al's mouth fell open in outrage. “I'm not done with my breakfast!”

Ginny's wand was already sweeping through the air. “Thank goodness toast is portable,” she said dryly, catching Harry's eye as she directed two slices towards the door.

He fought the urge to grin once more; an effort that was helped significantly by Lily's aggrieved sigh.

She crossed her arms over her chest; her head fell back against her chair as though she couldn't muster the energy to hold it up under the weight of the incredible burden that was her life.

“Oh stop it,” Ginny said impatiently as the door closed behind James and Al. “You've been grounded for a week, it's hardly the end of the world.”

Her eyes met Harry's again; they both looked away quickly.

“I'm going to miss Cassia's party!” Lily's tone made it abundantly evident that they were both morons and this was, in fact, the end of the world.

“Well, you should've thought about that before you snuck out of the house in the middle of the night.”

And almost gave me a heart attack, he didn't add, despite the truth of the statement, fearing he might sound quite as dramatic as Lily did.

“I said sorry,” Lily mumbled. “I am sorry.” She looked up at him, fixing Harry with wide, sincere brown eyes that he'd never been able to say no to when Ginny directed them at him; he'd already learnt he fared no better when it was Lily. “I won't do it again.”

His resolve wavered, but Ginny's hand found his leg beneath the table before he could say as much out loud, pinching hard enough to force Harry to look at her instead. Her eyes were hard and unyielding, inviting no deviation from their agreed course.

“We appreciate that,” she said firmly, turning back to Lily. “However, actions have consequences, and you're still grounded.”

“Unbelievable!” Lily's chair scraped loudly across the dining room floor. “Fine. I'll be in my room, making no noise, and pretending I'm not there!”

She pulled the door open with enough force Harry was surprised it remained on its hinges. “I'm pretty sure this infringes on my civil liberties!”

“It doesn't. Trust me, I'm well acquainted with the law,” Harry called after her retreating back.

“But we look forward to hearing from your lawyer,” Ginny added.

Lily's response was delayed, but the pointed slam of her bedroom door could be heard a few moments later throughout the house.

#hinny #harry x ginny #hinny as parents #ginniversary bingo #drabble

[misguidedasgardian]

I want to steal the bride (2)

2. Desserts, Yi-ti and old things

MASTERLIST

Summary: Aemond finds himself without you for the first time in ten years, so he starts to realize certain things 

Pairings: Aemond Targaryen x BestFriend!Reader, Cregan Stark x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Cursing, Aemond goes around hehe, Criston is sort of a red flag, but that is nothing new, since its an adaptation of the movie, I will be using sort of stereotypes, and there are some jabs about marriage and married men in this part.

Wordcount: 3.8 k

Disclaimer: This is a direct adaptation of the movie “Made of honor” and its script! also the pictures of the header aren’t mine, I took them from Pinterest 

Notes: UPPSSSS

It hasn't even been a week, and Aemond already missed you terribly, he had barely spoken to you, you whined with him about not getting service anywhere, and you were almost always disconnected from him

But he had his weekly meeting with his friends and his brother, and he was ready to play basketball and keep his mind off of things for a while

He met with his brother Aegon, and his friends Criston and Adam Velaryon 

“So, how was the old man’s wedding?”. teased Aegon

“You would have liked it, the bride I mean”, he muttered while tying up his laces of his shoes 

“What was this one? the fifth?”

“Sixth actually”, he said, Aegon chuckled

“For the gods!”, he laughed, “I’m guessing you went with Looooove”, he teased

“Yes, next wedding you go instead please”, he said seriously

“Oh please, you love to find any excuse to take her everywhere”, he mocked, they walk back towards the group and find the guys arguing

“I'm not gonna be able to play today, man. My back”, whined Addam

“If we don't have a fourth, we're gonna end up with Tiny Shorts Guy”, complained Criston

“How's it going?”, Larys Strong appeared with a basketball in his hands, he was known on the court for not being very handy with the ball, and for wearing booty shorts when he played, it was not pretty, “need another?”

“No, our friend Ramsay, with longer shorts, is coming”, said Aemond, he laughed and left, cleary not getting the hint

“No he is not coming!”, remembered Addam, Myranda signed him up for some art-walk thing”

“Art walk? Are you serious? Tell me something, what do you think Myranda did with his balls when she cut them off?”, mocked Criston

“Gods”, mocked Aemond, I go to art walks with (y/n) all the time”, he defended 

“Oh, come on, guys, marriage isn't that bad”, defended Addam

“I agree”, said Criston, playing with the ball in his hand, “without marriage, there'd be no divorce. So, without divorce, I wouldn't have my condo in the Vale”

“There you go”, laughed Aegon, “Good one” 

“I'm serious, man. You're missing out on the best parts of life”, continued the only current married man in the group, now speaking only to Aemond and Aegon, “the most important part of life”

“This coming from the guy whose wife won't let him go to bars”, said Aegon

“Hey, I thought we weren't gonna talk about that, huh?”, he said back, “and besides you are you to talk?”, asked Addam, annoyed, “you are single and you've been single ever since… What was her name, in sophomore year?”

“Um, Cer-, Cerse….Ceresse!” said Criston mockingly, everyone laughed, except for Aegon

“Ceresse, that's it!”, laughed Addam, “Ceresse dumped you for him sophomore year”, he mocked pointing at Aemond

“You've never been the same. You haven't been able to sleep”, mocked Addam

“Scarred”, mocked Criston

“Yeah. You have no idea how nice it is to have someone who's gonna be there for you, no matter what, forever”, concluded Addam

“And you don't know how nice it is to sleep with a different girl every night”, snapped Aemond

“That's true”, said Criston

“Nice rebuttal”, peached in Larys

“You know, you got the best of both worlds, Aemond”, said Criston

“It's true. I can sleep with whoever I want, but I still get to hang with (Y/N) afterwards. It's a perfect setup”, he said with the brightest of smiles, only thinking of you

“Well, maybe not for her”, muttered Addam, Aemond’s smile got wiped out pretty quickly

“What's that supposed to mean?”, he asked

“Come on, Aemond. She's a woman”, continued Aegon

“Yeah, I got that”

“You sure?”, mocked Criston

“Yeah”

“Dude, she's pushing 30. You think her idea of happily ever after is coming home to you and hanging out after you got laid?”, mocked Aegon, Aemond frowned 

“Makes you think, right?”, asked Larys, sneaking into the group

“Yeah”, nodded Addam

It did made him think

You had never shown yourself annoyed when he discussed his conquests with you, you loved hanging out with him on fridays, and… anytime, yes you were annoyed when he asked you to go to his grandfather’s weddings with him, but… anyone would, right?

With a sigh, he picked up the phone, and dialed you

It rang a couple of times, until you picked up

“Hello?”, he asked enthusiastically

“Hey”, you whispered lowly

“What’s going on?”, he asked, “were you sleeping?”, he mocked 

“Its very late here Aem”, you whined 

“How's the weather in White Harbor?”, he asked

“It's great. Only I'm in Winterfell”, he had woken you up, you were exhausted 

“Oh, right. Right”, his smile didn’t waver as he listened to your voice, “So, it's sunny”, he assumed 

“It's 3 in the morning”, you whined

“Oh, right. Sorry. So it's dark”, he said

“Yeah”

“Hey, have you seen the Big black wolf yet?”, he didn’t hear anything back, so he just dropped it, “I know, a terrible joke. Anyway…”

“Is there something important?”, you asked, falling asleep with phone in hand 

“Yeah, you'll never guess what happened”, he said with an enthusiastic tone

“What?”

“They filled in the pothole”, he said matter-of-factly

“The pothole?”, you asked, frowning

“On 83rd”

“Terrific. Hey, Aemond?”

“Yeah?”, he asked

“I'm gonna go back to sleep now”

“Oh, okay. Sure”, he said, finally catching on

“Love you”, you whispered, and Aemond jumped on his seat, it wasn’t the first time you had said it, but clearly it played with his mind

“Good night. Call me Tomorrow”, he said but you were already gone, and he hadn't said it back

He was more confused than before

He loves hearing your voice, and he missed you, but he didn’t know what to think, he didn’t even know what he was hoping for, what he expected with just one phone call, if that could give him more clearance 

It hadn’t

No, he shook his head, he couldn’t, no, he couldn’t

You were his best friend 

But his male friends were right, you… were a girl… a woman, you have had boyfriends before and it's not going to be long before you get another one, maybe one day you’ll get married…

The thought frightened him, he realized with surprise

The thought of being without you scared him to death

So he came to a conclusion…

A bad one…

He invited the last girl in his little black book, to meet her in the vintage store you both liked going to, it had to work… You were going to move on from him, and even though that scared him, he had to be prepared

He was with women all the time, he was going to prove everyone else wrong, he could get girl-friends….

“This stuff's all old”, Jeyne mumbled, looking everywhere, bored out of her mind

“Yeah. That's the point”, he answered, she looked back at him and shoot him a wink and a smirk

“Let's go to Fendi”, she said, perhaps it was a mistake to tell her how much he gained

“Fendi? No. No, no”, he said dismissively

“Yes!”, she shrieked 

“We're here. Let's just stay here”, he said, trying to convinced her

“I'm not into old stuff”, she whined like a little girl

“Why are you talking like a six-year-old?”, he said, immediately regretting his choice 

“I'm not”, she answered sharply

So the next day, he invited Floris to the famous bakery, to try his luck

“This line is too long. Can't we just go somewhere else?”, she asked, anoyyed

“No. This is the best bakery in the world. That's why it's worth waiting in line”, he said simply, but as she looked terribly annoyed, those stilettos she was weaning weren’t making her any favors to stay for two long on her feet, he tried a bit harder

“Come on, we'll play a game. Wanna play a game?”, that seemed to pick her interest

“Yeah, we can play a game”, she said, visibly more engaged

“Okay, good”, he said, now more confident, “Tell me what to order”, he teased

“Why?”, she asked back

“We are playing, that’s the game! you'll see. It'll be fun.Make a suggestion.

“A cookie”, she suggested

“No, no, you have to be specific, like what type of cookie?”, he pushed

“A really big cookie”

Alright this was a bad idea 

“Aemond, your phone's ringing”, said Alys Rivers, the girl he had been seeing every week, he ran back from the bathroom to pick it up, it was you! it had to be you

“Hello?”, he desperately asked into the phone, but there was no answer, only noise, “Hello?”, he asked, but no answer

“What's wrong?”, Alys asked when she say him sighing loudly and desperately

“Missed an important call”

“That's because you're an important person”, she teased. He looked at her, she was gorgeous, he liked having sex with her

“Do you like Yi-ti food?”, he asked curiously 

Half an hour later he was sitting on the same table he used to sit with you, and Alys was right in front of him

The cart was approaching and she smiled widely

“Hey, come to mama”, she giggled, “Uhh, we will have, um, two fried dumplings, two of the wontons, and six of the, uh, fried porky thingies”, she ordered

“Yeah, but that's fried”, he said, annoyed, once her order was on the table, she grabbed a fried piece with her chopsticks 

“Come on”, she teased

“It's not healthy”, he said seriously

“Have some of the fried. It won't hurt you”, she insisted, nearing the fried piece into his mouth. She dropped it, making the piece fall into his pants and staining them

She gasped apologetically

“Sorry…”

“Thank you”, he said, rolling his eyes

This was a bad idea 

It’s been weeks, he had dated, actually taken on dates, many women, and none of them, not one, had made him feel the way you do

He missed you

He realized there was no replacing you, there is no other woman he rather be with… and… that was driving him insane

So today he decided to calculate the hour properly, and call you early, it was nighttime still, but at a  night he knew you were going to be awake 

But it was a glitchy call, he knew it from the beginning

“Hello?”, he tried, rubbing his forehead

“Hey. Hello?”, your voice, so beautiful and melodic, it made Aemond feel like everything was well, like he was at peace, relaxed 

“Hello?”, he repeated, “Love?”

“Hello?”, you asked back

“Hey”, he said, excited of actually being able to talk with you

“Aemond? Aemond, is that you?”, you asked, “Aemond?”

“Hello?”, he asked, annoyed

You could barely hear him, you were on a two day trip to a castle on the outskirts of Winterfell, it started pouring, the road was a mess and you were surrounded by huge cows, they were everywhere

“Hello?”, you asked back, actually, the thought of hearing your best friend right now is just what you needed, but you couldn’t

“You're cutting out. I can't hear anything you've said”, you whined, “I'm stuck in a thunderstorm. I'm surrounded with a herd of cows. Listen, I'll call when I get to the hotel”, you tried to explain

“Love, I can't hear you”

“Aemond?”, you asked, “Hello?”

“Hello? Hello?”, you were interrupted, and hang up when someone knocked on the window of your car, you smiled apologetically, and found yourself in front of the most handsome man you had ever seen

“Oh Hello”

“You lost lass?”

. . .

“Oh, I hate Winterfell”, whined Aemond and threw his phone away to bag, it was basketball day again, and he need to get ready

But his mind was thousand of miles away

As the days passed he realized there was no other like you, you are the only one he liked to hang around with, he loved being with you, he… he loved you 

And the thought scared him

“C’mon C’mon C’mon!”, called Criston, but Aemond was barely able to move before Addam snatched the ball from him 

“We're having a hard time”, mocked Criston, “We're having a hard time”

“Oh, yeah? Want a hand?”, asked aegon, who got the bal and had no problem avoiding Aemond and threw a three pointer from half the court

“Give it up, baby”, he mocked

“Come on, Aemond. Aemond, Aemond”, called Criston, but Addam intercepted him

“Easy”, he mocked, Aemond tried to grab him, tired of failure

“Aemond, foul. That's a foul, Aemond”, called Aegon, “what's the matter with you today??”

“I don't know”, he whined, stopping in the middle of the court, “I think I might have feelings for (y/n)”

“Oh, come on, come on. Let's just play”, mocked Criston, but Aegon and Addam shared concerned looks 

“It's just... without her, something's off”, he explained, like it pained him, “It's got me thinking that, maybe, there's more to life than just sleeping around”

“I don't understand”, said Criston

“I-I'm not following”, muttered Aemond

“Come on, let's just play”, dismissed Aemond 

“I know exactly what you mean, Aemond”, said Addam with a shy smile on his face. Aegon and Criston shared concerned looks and passed the ball to each other

“I'm gonna tell her, when she gets home… I'm gonna tell her that I wanna be with her”, he said with a wide smile, “nothing about marriage, just be together”, Addam’s smile wiped out pretty quickly

“Yeah, that's romantic”, mocked Aegon

From hare, and for the next few weeks he still had ahead of him without you, he could breathe a bit more easy

. . . 

You have one unheard message.

A message from you! Aemond was so excited when he heard it

“Hey, Aem, I'm back. Gods, I cannot wait to see you! I don't care what you're doing tonight, cancel it. We're going to dinner”,  he smiled at the sound of your voice, this was going to be perfect, he knew exactly what he was going to say. “Meet me at that new trendy place next to the small Bravoosi  place we hated that used to be the Mantari-fusion place we loved. Meet me there, at 8 o'clock. I have so much to tell you!”

He had heard the voice message like eight times already while ha changed clothes, he was so so excited, he had his apartment cleaned, his suits pressed, his cologne, - the one you liked- stocked, his hair fixed, tonight, he was going to tell you that he had feeling for you, that he wanted to explore it further

With any luck, he was going to take you back to his palace for the night

You were going to be the first woman even going up there

And he was okay with that 

He entered the new place, it was very nice, as could turn into a date kinda nice, he looked at the flowers he bought on the street for you, and took a long breath as he told your name to the receptionist who led them to the back of the restaurant 

And there you were, gorgeous, like always

He could recognize you everywhere, anywhere 

But as he catched your glance and you smiled at him, you look back to someone else, and there it was, some guy, tall handsome, he hadn't seen him, instead he hugged you and kissed your neck

Fuck no

No no no no

Who was that?

he got so distracted that he didn’t see the waiter coming at him at full speed

They clashed scandalously, plates flew as the flowers and Aemond fell to the ground, not very elegantly, on top of the poor waiter

“AEMOND!”, you called, running to him. He was whining on the floor, “Aemond. You okay?”, you asked sweetly

“I'm all right. Are you all right?”, he asked, turning to the waiter who was moaning and wheezing in pain

“I think I broke a rib”, you helped Aemond up from the floor, and he smiled apologetically at you 

“His rib. I'm fine. I'm fine”, said Aemond, helping the poor waiter up on his feet, he was fine, he hoped 

“Are you okay?”, you asked to Aemond

“I'm so sorry”, muttered Aemond, the manager approached you

“I'm sorry, sir. Here are your flowers”, she said apologetically, trying to grab them front he floor

“Oh, but…”

“You had flowers?”, you asked him

“No, they're not my flowers”, he said dismissively

“They're your flowers. Those are yours”, said the waiter, grabbing his side

“I didn't have flowers”, fought Aemond, grabbing you softly and walking away from the scene. He finally turned to you and smiled

“Hi. It's good to see you”, he purred softly, his eye shining excitedly

“I missed you”, you admitted, hugging him quickly, “there's someone I want you to meet”

Aemond wanted to be the one that broke a rib

“Oh, good”, he said, not expecting you to notice the change in his demeanor 

“Aemond, this is Cregan”, there it was, this tall, handsome, beautiful man

“oh”, they shook hands, and Aemond didn’t know what to think

So fifteen minutes later, with a drink in hand, Aemond was pinching his own leg under the table, because he wanted to scream 

“It started pouring and suddenly it was just me in a field of cows…”, you laughed, Aemond watched in horror the way you were looking at that man, “of course, we're in the North there are no street signs anywhere and it's getting dark…”

“I think she thought she was in some bad werewolf movie”, he chipped in, and Aemond even hated to hear the sound of his voice, "Stay off the moors, lassie.", he continued

He only had eyes for you

“So, anyway, all of a sudden, out of nowhere, Cregan comes riding up on horseback”, your eyes are finally back on him, so he had to muster a weird smile. You laughed excitedly, Aemond had never seen you like that, “Can you believe it?”, you asked him “A horse! And asks me if I need any help”

“Wow!”, he said, faking it, not that you’d notice 

“You were a lady in distress. What was I gonna do?”, he said, Aemond wanted to throw up

Dammit Cregan, we are in a public place! Aemond was sure that if a policeman would have been here he would have arrested him, for public indecency and being a creep

“It was right out of a Valyrian novel”, you said lovingly, you could see that Aemond wasn’t that invested, so you smiled at him, what he had said that you where a “love slut” came back to you, “So, anyway, he shows me to this charming little inn where he proceeds to buy me the most awful dinner I have ever had”, you said, with a bitter taste in your mouth

Probably Aemond thought this was stupid, that you were being silly 

“Right. Okay. Aye. It was pretty bad, even by Northerner standards”, Cregan agreed with you

“Then, we just spent the next month traveling around the country, getting to know each other, and visiting museums. It was…”, you sighed, looking into Cregan’s eyes

“It was perfect”, he said right there with you, looking into yours

“So, when it was time for (y/n)  to leave, I just… I don't know, I just… I couldn't let her go”, Cregan finally found it in himself to look at Aemond

“Ah…”, he muttered

“So, I got down on one knee…”, you smiled widely, showing Aemond your hand, and the huge rock that decorated your ring finger

“And he proposed, and I accepted”, you said excitedly

Aemond was never a man who let himself be controlled by his emotions, that being said, he never thought he even had a nervous breakdown, or a panic attack… until now

He felt his heart beating sot wrongly he thought he was going to pass out 

“Wow, that's just… It's huge, it's…”, he couldn’t stand it, his legs were getting numb

“So, the wedding's coming together very quickly”, you continued

Oh suit fuck, shit, he started looking for the emergency exit, couldn’t find it anywhere 

“Ah, it sounds like it”, he managed to say, his mouth was dry

“We're gonna get married in Winterfell, at Cregan's parents' summer home”, you continued, another nail on his coffin

“It's gonna be a pretty small thing. We can't expect too many people to make the trip overseas in just a fortnight”, Cregan chipped in

“A fortnight”, he said, trying to calm himself

“Right!”, you said

“That's two weeks”, he said seriously

“It's crazy, isn't it?”, you asked him, he seemed to notice how incredibly nervous you were

“Have you ever been to Winterfell, Aemond?”, asked Cregan

“You know, I haven't”, he said, trying to smile, but his cheeks were numb too

“You should see the little church where we're exchanging our vows in”, that smile on your face, Aemond’s heart broke, if he could be the one that caused it, it was so beautiful and bright, filled with love, “It's the same church that Cregan's parents were married in”

“It's pretty spectacular. Just across the loch from our distillery”, of course

“Distillery?”

“Yeah, Cregan's family owns the largest whisky distillery in the North”, you said with a knowing smile

Did you expect him to like this Cregan person?

“Aemond, look…”, oh shit, he thought, “If you were getting married I'd expect to be your best man”, you said surely, and he paled even more, “Aemond… will you be my maid of honor?”, you asked excitedly 

“Your maid of honor?”, he asked, it felt like the knife this Cregan guy had plunged into him, was being twisted, he got up, he needed to get out of this place, he needed to run,t o scream to

He turned and BAM

He crashed against the same waiter, both ended up in the floor covered in some warm soup

“Oh, I'm so sorry”, he whined

“WHAT IS IT WITH YOU MAN?”, he screamed high pitched

taglist!

@snh96 @sagelovesreading @toodlesxcuddles @ammo23 @bananzaa @ttkttt @at-a-rax-ia

#misguidedmade #aemond targaryen x reader #cregan stark #cregan stark x reader #hbo house of the dragon #house of the dragon #aemond targaryen #cregan stark x you #cregan stark x oc #cregan stark x y/n #made of honor

[talkintrashcann]

Hello :) can you do a Xavier x reader when Wednesday locked up the reader in Xavier hut. Because she is fed up seing the two of them flirt ? Please? (More in Xavier side because, she is a oblivious)

Locked in - Xavier Thorpe

A/N: sorry that this took so long to write, ive been crazy busy with my exams. i hope this is kind of what you wanted me to write. thank you very much for requesting something, i really appreciate it!

warnings: don't think there are any

word count: 1.4k

———————

The sun was almost under, a few more sunbeams shining between the trees in the forest. It was quiet at that time of day, the only thing that could be heard were a few birds singing to each other and the sound of crunchy leaves made by the footsteps of two Nevermore students. It was a rather odd duo, Wednesday and y/n almost never went out with just the two of them. Usually Enid would accompany them since she's their mutual friend, but Wednesday insisted that only y/n should follow her into the forest. It was a bit suspicious in all honesty, what could she possibly need from her that Enid isn't allowed to know. The girl in black and white was very unpredictable, so the possibilities were endless actually. Maybe she wants to sacrifice her or maybe she's going to torture her to get some valuable information about the monster that's been loose.

"Where did you say you were taking me again?"

"I never said where we were going. But you'll see soon enough.", Wednesday said as she dragged y/n to a place deep in the woods.

After a few more minutes of walking in silence, Wednesday claimed they had reached their location. The view definitely wasn't as promising as y/n had hoped for, stopping in front of a weird looking shed. Now she was certain the cold girl was going to torture her until she'd get the information she was looking for. Why else would she take her to a wonky hut in the middle of the woods?

"This is what you wanted to show me? An old barn?", y/n said unimpressed.

"The outside may not be very promising, but the inside will be much more to your liking.", she says as she opens the door for her to take a look inside.

Y/n stood in the door opening, eyes scanning around the musty room before landing on Xavier peaking out from behind a big canvas in the back. Before she was able to turn around with a frown on her face and ask what was going on, Wednesday pushed y/n inside and slammed the door right in her face. Hearing the sound of a key turning in it's lock on the other side of the door caused y/n to push and pull at the door handle, trying to get out.

———————

Xavier's pov

I was deep in my thoughts, concentrating on the canvas in front of me, until I heard the door of my shed close loudly. I never even heard the door open but when I looked behind my canvas I saw y/n with her back turned towards me, trying to get out of my shed.

"Wednesday what the hell!", she yelled out, still not giving up on escaping.

"Uhm, what is going on here?", I asked confused.

"Wednesday said she wanted to show me something and now she locked me up in here. What are you doing here? Did she lure you in here too?"

"This is my shed actually, so I don't see why she would bring you here. Mind if I try?", I pointed to the door handle she was still gripping tightly. She gave me a quick nod before moving aside, allowing me to try opening the door. But it had no use, guess this shed was stronger than I thought.

"What is the meaning of this Wednesday?", I called out hoping she would still be there to give me an explanation of what was happening.

"I won't let you out until you stop lying to yourselves and confess already. Watching you two flirt with each other all the time makes me want to crawl inside an incinerator, turn it on and let it burn me alive. Although I'm usually fond of a burning sensation, I can't stand seeing you deny the obvious tension between the two of you.", she responded while we could hear her put the key away in her backpack and taking a few steps back.

"You can't be serious. She's joking right?", I looked back and forth between the door and y/n.

"Unfortunately, I don't think the word joking is in Wednesday's dictionary.", y/n mumble while looking away from me. I swear I could see a slight blush on her face.

"I'm always serious, thought you would know that by now Xavier. But it's starting to get dark outside and I don't want to miss my writing time, so I'd get comfortable if I were you and start confessing already. I'll be back later."

The sound of her boots stepping on leaves kept getting further away, it was clear she had left us in here alone. I turned around to look at y/n, the girl mumbling something under her breath. Wednesday was right about many things, there definitely was a tension between us that neither of us wanted to address. I've noticed how y/n's behavior was always different around me, she would be much more clumsy and she would always have that faint blush showing no matter how hard she tried to hide it. I never realized what that might have meant, but maybe that's what Wednesday was trying to say. What else would she be talking about right? It gives me a moment of hope, hope that y/n might actually be feeling the same way.

A few awkward minutes of silence go by, neither of us knowing what to say to one another. I stood there leaning against the wooden table in my shed, y/n had slid down the wall and was sitting on the floor with her head hiding in her arms. Playing with a paintbrush in my hand, I thought back to what Wednesday said before walking away. 'I won't let you out until you stop lying to yourselves and confess already.'. She was dead serious about keeping us here locked in until we talk about our feelings, at least that's what I assume she was trying to say. So I guess there was nothing else we could do but listen to her.

"Do you like me?", I managed to say way more direct than I wanted it to be. She shot her head up to look at me with wide eyes, I could just tell she was getting nervous from my question.

"What? I mean yea- I guess, cuz we're like friends you know, of course I like you...", she stuttered. It made me chuckle to see her reacting that way, it really was becoming obvious that she did like me.

"Not just in a friend way, y/n."

Taking a few steps in her direction, she shuffled in her place tensely, squatting down in front of her. I reached my hand out to tug a piece of her hair behind her ear, looking into her pretty eyes. She wasn't answering my question but instead just stared back at me, my hand resting on her warm cheek.

"I like you, more than just a friend.", I decided to say since she wasn't ready to talk yet. It looks like words just weren't really her thing, but actions certainly were. Without saying anything, she grabbed my shirt and pulled me in for a sweet kiss. It took me by surprise, not expecting her to make such a bold move all of a sudden. I didn't hesitate to kiss her back instantly, her lips were so soft and gentle that I never wanted to let go of her. But she slowly pulled away and let go of my shirt, face still close to mine.

"I really like you too, Xavier.", she whispered to me and I could see a small smile appear. It made me smile too, happy that the tension was finally gone between us. Who would've thought Wednesday was such a good matchmaker?

"Are you sure you know where we're going? We've been walking for like 15 minutes and I still don't see a stupid hut. Oh God, I should've just insisted to come with them. Maybe they're like dying in there, I mean I would die if I wasn't able to post on my blog for this long.", a familiar voice said in the distance,

"Enid, can you please calm down. I know where Xavier's shed is, he's showed it to me a few times. And they've only been in there for 45 minutes maybe so stop exaggerating, I'm sure they're just fine.", another familiar voice replied as they were getting closer.

The door of my shed started to rattle before it swung open, revealing Enid and Ajax. A worried Enid started sprinting towards us to ask if we're okay, meanwhile Ajax was still standing in the door opening eying us suspiciously. Looks like Enid somehow succeeded in convincing Wednesday to tell her what she did to her best friend, dragging Ajax with her to find us. Maybe next time we should lock them up in here, think they could use a little confession time as well.

#xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe fanfic #xavier thorpe x you #xavier thorpe imagine #xavier thorpe wednesday #xavier fanfic #wednesday #wednesday imagine

[limedtown]

hate making this post but. hi im Eli, a physically disabled gay trans man, and im what the kids call "extremely broke"

ive been out of work since April '23 due to said disability and really have not been able to find anything that i'm able to do otherwise so i've been trying to scratch out a living through my art and my handmade jewelry on my Etsy store. this is, as you can imagine, not a particularly glamorous profession, but thankfully my partner's income has been able to support us for the last almost-year, albeit barely.

i'm trying to open commissions here soon but i'm going in for top surgery (finally) on March 5th, which is going to take me out for a couple of weeks while i recover, so i won't be able to work on art for at least a little bit. my partner is also taking almost 2 weeks off of work to take care of me - thankfully our state ensures paid family medical leave that we'll be able to get, but it's not entirely certain right now when that's going to pay out and we'd like to not be left w literally nothing if there's a delay.

UPDATE 3/4: they fuckin cancelled and rescheduled my top surgery on me last minute! 🙃 the only good news is this gives me extra time to try and get commissions opened this week. the bad news is this means we won't get the medical leave pay we were supposed to. and my partner's shifts that he took off for this time have all already been covered.

all of this to say money is really tight right now; major bills are paid for but we still need food and household goods - i would like to be able to eat while i'm recovering from surgery but that's just, like, a personal preference of mine

i know the economy is in shambles and a lot of people need money rn but if you're able i'd really appreciate if you could check out my Etsy or Ko-fi shop; as i said before i make handmade jewelry and i'm selling some Sailor Moon pride flag stickers rn (the latter are currently only available on Ko-fi rn)

i really hate asking for something for nothing so please check out my shop links and help support me that way if you can. that said i'm grateful for any help at all so i'm still going to put my v*nmo here at the end of the post in case anyone would like to kick some help our way through there instead.

and if you can't help i'd really appreciate a reblog, any visibility would go a long way rn :')

tl;dr please consider helping out a broke disabled artist going into top surgery this week fucked over because of a top surgery cancellation, ty

ETSY | KO-FI STORE

BF'S COMMISSION POST | BF'S ETSY

v*nmo: elmtrees

#caws #:^)

[theheirofthesharingan]

Random question, but let's say that Itachi lived right? Like all the way to Boruto, do you think Itachi would probably be that one, almost, father figure to Sarada in a way? Considering since Sasuke has always been away from the two of them (Sakura and Sarada) if Itachi decided to stay in Konoha instead of traveling with Sasuke? Also I wonder how Itachi would react to Sasuke being with Sakura as well, I wonder, what do you think?

Interesting question.

To answer this, we need to consider some major factors that were crucial in shaping their lives.

If itachi lived, he should have the development he did during the war i.e. realizing treating Sasuke like a baby was a bad choice he made all along.

Sasuke doesn't know Itachi is alive. Why would he leave the village in the first place if Itachi was alive?

Itachi doesn't know where Sasuke is. Why else would Itachi stay in the village if he could be with his brother?

Konoha has somehow cleared his name and acknowledged its own crimes against the clan.

Still, I'm going to answer this question with the ideas that are independent of each other and don't need each other to exist (if that makes sense?)

I think Itachi would be a terrible father figure to Sarada. He didn't grow up to lead a normal life full of love and comfort. He was a Shinobi who was trained to kill. That's what he did all his life and he never had the time to be anything other than that. He loved Sasuke a lot, but his expression was thoroughly violent, although under extreme duress, and in a slightly easier life he'd have served better. He doesn't know how to be a normal person. He doesn't understand how to be something that's not a Shinobi and a killer. He was conditioned since his childhood to live a certain way and the change in the lifestyle would not change anything for him. I personally don't see him being able to guide Sarada or be a positive/healthy influence in her life. He can't give anything to her, or anyone, for that matter.

He's way, way too damaged as a person. Even if you include therapy sessions those won't erase his past and what he feels about himself. He can't offer anything in a bonding that isn't with Sasuke. He'd still feel some affection towards Sarada. He has no reason to not like her, but he can't be a parent figure to her. I mean, isn't that the whole reason Sasuke, too, isn't a 'good father' to Sarada? He too is damaged beyond repair.

Some anti-SS content under the cut. No slander or bashing of the characters, but my opinion on why Itachi might not approve of Sakura as his brother's life partner. I'll tag the post accordingly. Please don't read if you're a fan of the pairing.

He will not be overly thrilled about Sakura being in Sasuke's life. Sasuke didn't love Sakura and Sakura never loved Sasuke. She was obsessed with an image of his she found alluring and his absence in her life fed that longing further, making her feel she loved him. He was a trophy for her she was to win in the contest of her rivalry against Ino.

In other words, she had no genuine feelings for Sasuke.

Sasuke, too, never felt any affiliation towards her. Yes, there were some moments he cared about her deeply, but he's genuinely kind and caring towards people. If he loved her he'd be more open about his feelings.

When Itachi met Team 7 in the Kazekage Rescue Arc, he paid no attention to Sakura. His attention was solely on Naruto and was happy to see Naruto had grown so much from the last time they met. There was a reason he entrusted Sasuke with Naruto. And he wouldn't be too pleased to know that Sakura once tried to kill his brother for whom he bore the worst pains and sins in his heart.

That alone would infuriate him. However, it wouldn't matter to him if Sasuke really loved Sakura, because I don't think the Itachi that bid farewell to Sasuke in the war would claim any stakes on him. If Sasuke loved Sakura he would be okay with it, but not trust her. Itachi's brain works in different ways. xD

Itachi would also understand there's a reason his brother doesn't want to be with his family. And his lack of affection towards them would tell him everything. He decided things for Sasuke when he saw him as a child in the past, but won't make the same mistakes again.

I think he'd like Sarada, but won't be extremely fond of Sakura. Though I don't see him being good with kids at all.

#itachi #sasuke #uchiha brothers #anti sakura #anti sarada #anon #ask #anti sasusaku #anti ss

[descendinginto-madness]

welt except he has a fever and desperately needs sleep

cw: descriptions of illness, high fever, being kinda delirious/out of it, sleep deprivation?, nightmares, headaches, mentions of death

contains spoilers for welt's hi3 lore

also, disclaimer! welt in here is very reluctant to ask for help and feeling bad about it because... well i imagine he'd react like this, BUT! needing help and asking for it is completely normal and valid and okay; please remember that and take care of urself ok!! ily /p

alright, so...

i'm gonna be honest since i found @bugbytez13 's blog welt sickfic ideas don't want to leave my head LMAO except i will write a detailed description of a fic instead of the fic itself. that's it that's the post

tbh this ramble in particular could be made into two separate fanfics (one sickfic and one specifically about the nightmares) but shh

i will forever be self conscious or anxious about things i post that aren't just headcanons or silly little rambles, but also... writing this went surprisingly smoothly so! enjoy the essay or something idk HAHA

======================================

so, about welt...

i just know this man is going to force himself to stay awake. maybe his self-sacrificing issues are less present now, and he doesn't immediately throw himself in danger in every fight ever, but he's still stubborn as hell. so he won't admit something is wrong. he won't admit that maybe getting way too little sleep several days in a row wasn't doing wonders for his immune system and he's now finally feeling the consequences. to be fair, he expected it might end like this, but he didn't want to take breaks - there's still too many things to take care of before they finally head to penacony. and now, he will still insist of taking care of everything, even though his body is basically begging him to go take a nap.

except maybe, he didn't even expect it to get this bad. or thought that he can just power through it. i mean, he's been through much worse, right? this is nothing compared to literally losing his body for some time. but he's sitting in the parlor car, and he's half awake, and unusually cold, and his head is hurting, and keeping up the act is getting harder and harder - but he has to, because the younger members of the crew are here too, even if only march is talking to him.

but they pick up on the fact that something is wrong, of course they do. his eyes are unfocused, he looks like he's about to fall asleep - or pass out - and march had to repeat herself twice for him to even fully process what she was asking him, and so suddenly stelle is next to him, attempting to touch his forehead - and he recoils. "i'm fine," he says, and it's probably a bit too quick and a bit too firm than he'd like it to be, and all of this is stupid, really, because he shouldn't be scared of someone touching him. how hot can it really be anyway if he's feeling so cold, right? but if that wasn't enough dan heng asks an even more dreaded question, "are you sure, mr yang? do you want us to call himeko?" and welt decides it's time to excuse himself, before he makes them even more worried. because even in his present state, he can pick up on the fact they're concerned, but at the same time unsure of what to do, and it makes him feel guilty. of course they're unsure; he's usually their caretaker, and he always knows what to do, and it should never be the other way around. he should've just stayed in his room all day, shouldn't he.

"thank you all for your concern, but i'm alright." he stands up. "now, please excuse me, i still have some work to do." of course that's true, but he's almost certain he won't be able to focus on that- but he just needs an excuse to get out from here and be left alone anyway.

but stelle is right next to him, and looking determined to accompany him to his room, too. "you look like you're about to fall, mr yang," they explain, and he wants to insist that he's okay once again, but realizes he's too tired to do so. it would take him at least a few minutes, and it's a few minutes he doesn't have nearly enough energy for. he just wants to finally lie down. so, he lets stelle essentially escort him into the hallway and to his bedroom, and make sure he doesn't collapse on his way there, and-- it's embarassing, honestly, because it's already so difficult for him to show himeko the slightest hints that something might be wrong, and right now the situation is similar but ten times worse - so it's also ten times harder for him to come to terms with the fact he needs to rely on someone.

"my... apologies for making you all worry," he says quietly when they reach his room, and he's so thankful that he left the lights off, because the parlor car was way too bright, and though the hallway was a bit better, it still wasn't good.

"it's alright," stelle shakes her head, and stands there in the doorway, even as he heads towards his bed and sits down. "i'll ask himeko to check up on you in a bit?" she asks, and he only nods, though he isn't sure if she can actually see it. he doesn't want to talk anymore, he doesn't want to think because even just that seems to make his headache worse, he just wants stelle to leave, he just wants to sleep-- he isn't even sure if he understood her question correctly, but he also doesn't have the energy to care. he falls asleep the moment the door closes behind her, fully clothed and half covered with a thick blanket, but even then he isn't allowed a peaceful rest.

memories from old battles flash before his eyes, silhouettes of enemies he once fought, those against whom he won - but also of those who severly injured or even killed him, and with that come the memories of the pain

and the fear of losing his body again.

when he finally awakens, sweating, shaky for reasons other than his fever, and still feeling pretty awful, it takes him longer than usual to remember where he is. it takes him longer than usual to remember that he's safe.

but now there's medicine and a thermometer on his nightstand, and a note written in himeko's neat handwriting - though he actually spots and reads it some time later - telling him to rest as much as he needs to, because she'll take care of everything; and only after he does read it and feels a sense of relief come over him, he realizes how much the thought of having to leave all the work in order to take a break actually stressed him out. he still feels bad about it, because of course he does, and of course he's going to apologize to everyone later.

but he's also able to sleep more peacefully now.

#whump #whump writing #welt yang #honkai star rail #hsr #rambles #hsr headcanons #headcanon #stelle #march 7th #dan heng #ig these three are here for a bit! #sickfic #angst? #hurt/comfort #i guess #himeko #dim writing ☁️