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bibbykins · 3 years

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Cookies and Fingertips (M)

Some Jimin loving! We love to see it! I hope you all enjoy this installation as I try to figure out how to properly flesh out characters in a drabble series. Am not sure how I’m doing there but I hope you all enjoy it nonetheless. As always, tips are not required but greatly appreciated, just like your thoughts! Pls share your thoughts though, they brighten my day!

Note: This is part of a drabble series The Household’s Bunny

Summary: You and Jimin met long before you moved in, and yet, you’re not sure if he even likes you. So what else is there to do but take every opportunity to talk to him until you figure it out?

Jimin has had a debilitating crush on you long before you moved in and he is almost positive there is no way you’d feel the same. And yet, he doesn’t have the strength to properly avoid you.

Word Count: 4k

Warnings: 18+, soft yandere-ish, obsessive thoughts, possessive thoughts, fingering, handjob, subspace, cum eating (sorta?), discussion of hospitalization, mentions of a stalker, mentions of passing out, the word “fat” is used, a moment of thigh riding, surprise kiss, insecurity

Jimin looked across the courtyard as his eyes remained fixated on your form. You were a simple second year in college and he was just a breath away from graduating. He first laid eyes on you a mere year ago and he can't remember what life was truly like before you smiled at him. You both had only ever exchanged pleasantries, so he opted to wait for the right time to make his move.

“That’s not true.” Your voice snapped Jimin from his staring contest with the PowerPoint slides, “That’s an antiquated idea, not a proven theory.” He looked to you, a couple rows down. You were plump and cute to say the least. He recognized you from a few of his courses. He had heard you were a double major in Art and… damn, what was the other?

The man you had rebutted had his face turning red, “It is proven, it was studied in 1973 with significant results yielded.” Jimin had no idea what you both were debating but he watched a sea of student nod in agreeance with you, some with the guy. What class was he even in? He looked at the PowerPoint slides, reading them for the first time today. Ah, he was in his psych of gender class. Maybe you were a psych major.

“In 1973, with no women in the participant pool, are you not seeing the issue in making a multi-gendered generalization whilst utilizing one genders perspective, a perspective that is also quite dated, mind you?” You cocked a brow and Jimin found himself a bit amused at the man who scoffed.

“You learn those words in high school two months ago?” He snapped back and Jimin grimaced along with most of the lecture hall.

“What? You need me to define them?” You quipped, eliciting some laughter as the professor regrouped.

“Ah, educational discourse.” The professor joked lightly as Jimin’s eyes remained fixed on you as you noticed a few lingering gazes on you, shrinking in your seat.

He saw you in the lunch hall, sitting alone, not uncommon for anyone in college, except your eyes were a bit puffy. Before he could even question the urge, he acted. Within a few steps, he was at your table and you looked up in confusion, “Uh, hi?” You meekly spoke and Jimin realized he had no plan.

“U-Uh, you… uh… do you like the cookies?” He forced out and immediately wished he could disappear.

You looked down at the cookie on your plate, “Uh, yes? Is-Is this a fat joke or do you actually want to know?” You asked cautiously.

Jimin’s eyes widened, “No, I mean yes, I mean no, I would never make fun of your weight.” He squeezed his eyes and sighed, not able to see your growing smile at his mental turmoil, “I have psych of gender with you and people rarely talk in that class so I thought you were pretty cool.” He smiled and he noticed you relax.

You nodded, smiling slightly, “Ah, I see. Thank you.” You beamed and it was like he felt the warmth from you, “I don’t do super well with attention but I also have poor impulse control.” You chuckled and he finally understood why you had cried and his heart strings were tugged a bit, “And yes, the cookies are good.” You split one in half and offered it to him.

Life goes by a lot quicker when one waits for the perfect opportunity. This much he found out quickly when he found himself a year later, looking across the courtyard at you, this time as your TA. He tried dating to get the daunting idea of talking to you after that singular interaction in which he forgot to give you his name from his mind to no avail. No matter, surely this would be the year.

”Jiminie is so hot!” Jimin continued to pretend not to hear his ex, Yoora, whine in your ear as he observed the intro to modern dance class.

You looked to her thoughtfully as you stretched, “You mean the TA, that is not that far away?” Your voice was lowered, but he could still hear you. He found himself listening closer, wondering if you remembered the singular interaction you both had. Yoora nodded in the corner of his eye.

“Yep.” She affirmed, “We dated, it was magical, and he’s still hot.” She mused and Jimin grimaced a bit, feeling bad he dated a girl that seemed to be a decent friend of yours, “Do you know him?”

Jimin perked up a bit, “We talked once, seems nice, is obviously hot.” You shrugged, “I doubt he remembers me, though.” You leaned down to reach past your left foot as Yoora urged you on with her eyes, “I had gotten into a weird debate with this one dude in a class we had and he saw me after, and I had just cried because I hate arguing and stares.” You and Yoora laughed a bit, “Then, he just came up to me and asked if I liked the cookies I were eating, and I wasn’t sure if he was calling me fat at first.” Yoora gasped and Jimin felt pain just thinking about the awkwardness, “He wasn’t, and he got cutely flustered when I asked and then I gave him half of my cookie and that’s all.” You moved to your other leg, “And then he never talked to me again.” You laughed and Jimin wanted the floor to swallow him.

Another year goes by. The day before he was going to try and ask you out, you were hospitalized. He didn't know how to even approach the topic with you, but he did try to be there for you throughout that year. The professor he was TA for insisted Jimin also utilize his emails, so all throughout your brief stay in medical care, it was him who received your bubbly emails. The emails full of little emoticons and exclamation points that made him giddy and took him hours to conceptualize a response to. Although you didn't know it was him giving you extensions and safe regards, he still meant it.

He was practicing when he got the email,

“Attention students,

We have received knowledge of an incident that has resulted in the hospitalization of a student that occurred within an apartment close to campus. Proper authorities have been notified and the student is recovering well. Please remain safe and vigilant.”

His face twisted in confusion when he got a text from the professor he was TA for that you were the student in question.

Throughout the semester, Jimin watched you with careful eyes as you slowly acclimated back to yourself. He wondered how he could have been so blinded by your smile that he couldn't properly see your eye bags or the way you looked over your shoulder when you thought no one was looking at you, or how he couldn't see he wasn't the only one looking at you.

When you returned, he watched your eyes relax and your guard go down again. He just wished he could've been there to help you get there. He trudged home one day and found you, and then his whole world was flipped by you again.

Since moving in, he found himself way more advanced with you than he ever imagined. You would plop next to him on the couch and give him a smile, "How was your day, Jiminie?" You beamed at him each time and he nearly choked on his spit each time.

He would mumble an answer and you would hum before watching TV with him, a show he deliberately put on each time he heard you come home. Eventually, you began watching competition shows together, theorizing who would win what. It was comfortable and close, and he found himself falling for you even harder.

"Do you wanna have lunch together?" Your voice pulled him from his thoughts in the practice room he had on his floor in the building. He had agreed to help with your final. The only time he could talk to you without it being a mental nightmare was when it was about dancing. The only time he could initiate contact was in this studio.

The studio gave him a certain air of confidence that even you could see. He wasn't a different person, more so multi-faceted. There was the shy and bumbling part of Jimin just as much as there was the sharp-eyed and focused Jimin. Not to mention the way his fingers would dance on your form as he gave you pointers made you unreasonably aroused.

Even so, determined to challenge himself, he nodded, "Lead the way." His voice was smooth even after two straight hours of practice and you wondered how he could look so hot work out clothes.

You both decided to pick up food and eat it at the studio. You sat across from each other as you ate in polite conversation. It was after you both picked up the food and sat on the floor you spoke up again, "You know, Jiminie." You started, eyes shyly fixated on the floor, "I wanted to thank you for not telling the guys about my, uh, incident a year ago." You finally looked him in the eyes, a soft smile on your face, "Not that it's a huge secret, especially on campus, but I just prefer to tell people myself." You mused.

He blinked, surprised you would thank him for something like that, "O-Of course, I mean, a lot of rumors were going around anyways, so even if I did want to tell them, I doubt I have only the facts." He shrugged, "It's not anyone else's business regardless."

You stifled a little giggle, "Yeah, some of the stories got a bit crazy." You sighed a bit, "From a stalker attacking me to me passing out in the middle of the street." Jimin looked up at you. You didn’t meet his gaze, most likely reliving the aftermath of the whole campus finding out you were hospitalized and are a cam girl in the same week. Not that you were ever hiding you job, but you just wished you could tell people on your own terms.

"Yeah, some crazy things get told in the Arts department." He murmured, "I only knew most of the facts because your TA for Professor Lee's class."

It was your turn to look up, but instead of confusion he saw a polite smile, "I know, silly." You chuckled and when you saw his confused face you looked at him incredulously, "Come on, you're Park Jimin! Of course I'm gonna know the 'hottest dance major'" You fake gushed and he finally broke a laugh, making you giddy.

"Of all things to know me by." He shook his head, smile still present.

You studied his face as his eyes scrunched and cheeks lifted, making you smile as well, "I've never made you smile before and your smile is so pretty." You mused, "I need to step up my comedy game."

"You've never seen me smile?" He looked surprised at this, considering he always smiled like an idiot when he stared longingly at you.

"I mean, sort of, but not to this degree." You shook your head, "I was starting to think you didn't like me for a while."

His eyes widened at this and he panicked, "No, no! I do like you, a lot!" He exclaimed, much to your amusement and to his dismay. You watched him get red with a grin.

He stammered, staring at his fork before he heard your melodious laugh. He looked up and his face softened at the sight of your smile, "You're too cute, Jiminie." You reached forward and pinched his cheek, making his breath hitch. Your cooing tone made something click inside him. He didn't want to be just cute to you, he wanted to be more than any adjective, he wanted to be yours.

He reached up, hand going to wrap around your wrist loosely, "I was the hottest a second ago and now I'm just cute?" A glint of confidence shown in his eye as he made you gulp, "Is that all you think of me, y/n?" Your own name coming from his mouth sent a shiver down your spine and a beat to your core.

You were in a trance while being eyed by the man with a vastly different energy than he had just moments ago. You shook your head lightly, "I think you're beautiful." He cocked a brow and you scrambled for more words, "I had a huge crush on you from the moment I gave you half of my cookie." You breathed before even thinking, snapping you back to reality as you watched his eyes widen, "Ah, me and my mouth!" You admonished yourself, "I didn't mean to make you uncomf-" You frantically moved to take your hand back only for his grip to tighten, pulling you forward, placing your hand at the nape of his neck while his arm wrapped around your waist.

You gulped at the newfound closeness, bodies nearly pressing against each other as he eyed you sharply, "Do you mean it?" He breathed, "You had a crush on me?" You made a move to slink away, but you he gracefully laid himself down with you on top of him, his thigh mere centimeters from your core and he gave you a mischievous smile, "Don't leave me hanging." He teased.

"I-I mean… yes, but can-"

He cut you off with a sigh and a laugh. You braced yourself for him to laugh at you, and say how weird it would be had you confessed and how weird the idea of you two together would be.

It's a song and dance you've seen many times as a hopeless romantic chubby girl. Of course, now you know you were just too much woman for such little men, emotionally little at the very least, but you would be a liar if you didn't still feel the hurt of humiliation. The last thing you wanted was to look into Jimin's eyes and find the same pitying glint, but you were nothing if not a bit brave, at least sometimes.

You forced your eyes from his chest to his gaze and found… an emotion you've only every seen in the eyes of your housemates, an emotion you don't quite know yet, even if you felt it too. At your curiosity, Jimin beamed at you further, "I'd be really frustrated right now if you weren’t on top of me." He chuckled a bit and explained further before you could ask why, "I have had such a huge crush on you for years now." You balk at this, shaking you head.

"That's not a funny joke, Jiminie." You huffed, "If I were even a bit more gullible, I would seriously believe you and then my feelings would be hurt-" He pulled you flush against him as he captured your mouth in a soft and sweet kiss. He was slow, but focused, in the way his mouth moved against yours.

Inside, though, Jimin was freaking out. What if you didn't actually want to kiss him? Why didn't he ask beforehand? Should he pull away? But your mouth feels so good. Are you kissing him back or is he just that enthusiastic?

You laid his worries to rest when you used the hand at his nape to pull him closer, mouth opening to nibble on his bottom lip. He groaned lightly, pulling you closer as his tongue mingled with your own and he pressed his thigh into the thin material of your leggings. You gasped at this and it was like a fire lit within him as he sat up and shifted you for your legs to be on both sides of him as he pressed his mouth onto yours further.

His fingertips danced along your form in a much different context than you were used to, but fuck, did it feel nice. Where one arm was securely holding your waist, his hand reached beneath your shirt, getting accustomed to the soft skin as he waited for you to nod. You wanted him to touch you further. You didn't understand what all these hot men wanted with you, but right now, it didn't matter one bit.

Jimin's eyes rolled back when he reached in your sports bra to run his fingers over your hardened nipples. You twitched against him as you gasped, fingers intertwining with his hair roughly, "Shit." He groaned at the sensation.

You both sloppily kissed as he explored your chest with his hands, moaning into each other's mouths at the euphoria of unresolved feelings coming to fruition and the sexual tension finally snapping as you gave him unrestricted access to feel you beneath his fingertips, "Wanted this for so long." He murmurs into your mouth, "So beautiful, fuck." The praises don't stop, and only further spur you wandering hand on as you feel his sculpted stomach.

"Wanna touch you." You whine as your fingers play with the waistband of his sweats and he nods, his own hand travelling down to cup your core, making you squeak, "Fuck, I'm so wet." You realized, half embarrassed and half aroused.

You could feel his amusement as he slipped his hand beneath your tights and panties to make skin to skin contact with your soaked core, and he didn't know how he made it this far, but he just wants to keep going as he feels you soak his hand, "Yeah, baby, you are, just for me." He moans when you follow his lead, hand wrapping around his hardened erection and giving a small squeeze, "Shit!" He gasps as you wiggled your hips against his hand, grinding yourself little by little.

Your hand massaged the head, smearing the precum as you begin stroking him. You both continue moaning into each other's mouths as his hips jerked and you twitched against his hands, "So fucking wet, baby, so sexy." He growled and he slipped a finger inside of you, him groaning at your pulsating warmth wrapped around his finger, "Slid right in, angel." He praises and you let out a choked gasp and he presses his thumb against your clit.

He drank your moans into his mouth like they were an oasis in the desert, and he’s not sure how he’s lived this long without them. Without you by his side and in his arms. He held you close, refusing to even consider loosening his grip because your body against his was bliss in the highest form. You were his, even if just in this moment, and you would be nobody else’s. Nobody could make him feel the way you do, and he, along with the other men that resided in the building, were determined to hold the same monopoly over your emotions. He refused to entertain the idea of anyone beyond this building making you feel anything close to what he was now as he pushed a second finger in, relishing in the strangled moan you gave as you babbled about feeling full.

With the excitement of his dream girl dripping against his hand and your own hand working expertly on his dick, Jimin could feel himself getting close and you could tell from the breathy whines he gave you as he began thrusting his hips in time with his fingers inside you, "Cum for me, Jiminie." You purred before licking at his tongue and he came beautifully with his eyes screwed shut and mouth open as you swiveled your hips agains his, now two, fingers.

"Baby, so good." He whined as his high settled down. He shifted all focus to you and your impending orgasm as he watched you fuck yourself onto his hand, "Feeling good, darling?" He asked teasingly and you nodded dumbly, lips pressed together as you felt your high approach, "I can feel you clenching around my fingers, fuck, you gonna cum in my hand all pretty?" He cooed and you nodded as he met your thrusts, making you clutch onto him harder.

"Can I cum?" You whimpered and Jimin could almost feel himself get hard again at how willing you were to give him the reigns.

"Because you asked so sweetly, of course my love." He let the name slip before you both could even acknowledge it consciously. However, the closeness and the intimacy of it all sent you over the edge and you bit down on his shoulder in attempt to hide how loud you were. He held you close, not minding one bit at the mark you were surely leaving as he fucked you through your orgasm, "Felt good, angel?" He mused and you tucked your face into his neck as you nodded, holding him close as his finger stilled but kept you full until he felt you relax.

You both giggled as you met eyes, licking the other person's cum off of your hands, "Thank you Jiminie." You hummed cheerily.

"Thank you, bunny." He chided before giving you a kiss, "We all really, really, like you, you know that right?" He asked and noticed your hesitation.

"Sure, but people can be sexually attracted to me and not want to… be with me." You spoke wistfully, "People can like me and not want to be with me." You let out a humorless laugh, "And few things make me feel as dumb as getting my hopes up for no reason." Although you had a tendency to do it time and time again.

"Don't be scared to assume we want you as much as you, hopefully, want us." He spoke quickly before he planted another kiss on you and the affection made you smile.

"You realize the irony of the statement coming from you, right?" You chuckled as he helped you stand on shaky legs before just carrying you, "I cum once for you and all of sudden you know everything and are all confident." You chided, unsure how to process his words yet, mind hazy from your orgasm.

"What can I say? You opened my third eye." He joked and you rolled your eyes before leaning your head on his shoulder, enjoying his embrace, the idea of your housemates loving you back seeming just slightly less like an outlandish fantasy, "Although, it will wear off and then we'll have to do it all over again." He sighed dramatically and you giggled.

"What a shame." You fake gasped, "I hate engaging in sexual relations with hot guys." You complained sarcastically.

"So you do think I'm hot!" Jimin cheered triumphantly.

You laughed against him and realized the only times you felt so free were with your beloved housemates. You wondered if they felt the same. You also found a more insecure part wondering for how long they would feel that way. How long would it be until a girl, or several, much prettier than you or less needy catches their attention. You wondered if you could take the pain of watching the sincerity drain from their eyes just as you've seen in your mom, your dad, your uncle, your first relationship to your last. You wondered what it was about you that made it so easy to be left behind.

Jimin's phone pinged, ripping you from your melancholic thoughts. He sighed, pulling it out and you fought the urge to see if it was another person vying for his romantic attention. He didn't belong to you, even if you wanted him to, "Ah, Namjoon wants to know if you want the demo for the new zombie game he's working on and Jin wants to know if you'd like your first pick of the new stickers he got, and Hoseok wants to try a new hairstyle on you and ah, they all sent me something to ask you…. Gosh, they all think I'm your secretary when we're together." He whined and you held onto him tighter with a light laugh as he went through everyone's inquiries for you.

You also found yourself how you went on this long without them and how you could even consider hesitating if they asked you to stay with them for much longer.

Tip Jar

#yandere bts #bts au #bts fanfic #bts smut #jimin smut #park jimin #yandere jimin #yandere bts smut #yandere smut #the household bts

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wolf-and-bard · 3 years

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The Geraskier divorce attorney AU of my dreams (hear me out):

-Geralt doesn't have regulars. Of course, he doesn't have regulars, he's a divorce attorney, a good one at that; sure sometimes there are clients that hire him twice because of mistakes or short-lived marriages, or he will have the odd person whose ex-partner he once helped, but in his ten-year-career, he's never once had a person come to him more than twice

-He has never married. The few long-term relationships he had didn't amount to anything in that regard and perhaps his job has spoiled the whole affair for him; there's never been a need either, he has his daughter Ciri, has his horse Roach which he rides on weekends, he couldn't be more content (or so he thinks)

(-Jaskier knows that many people would and do call him a whore, an adulterer, but he isn't. He is a romantic, a fall-in-lover, a dreamer, a free spirit. Which is why he gave himself the name 'Jaskier' (much more befitting of his character than Julian, what a common name) and why he tends to end up at the altar... more often than is strictly normative)

-The first time Jaskier enters Geralt's office, he acts as though it's the beginning of a Broadway show. He walks in, stands in the middle of the room and opens his arms wide. "Good day," he twitters and flashes Geralt the brightest grin. Geralt raises his eyebrows, but he isn't about to turn away a guy who looks affluent enough he can charge him a little extra. "Hello?" - "Julian Alfred Pankratz, call me Jaskier." Jaskier settles into the chair opposite Geralt's desk and puts his leather-clad feet up on them. Geralt pushes them off and asks: "Mr. Pankratz, what can I do for you?" - "Ah yes. My lover and muse, the Countess de Stael, has left me for another. The problem is that we got married just last month and I'm afraid she is going to bleed me dry if I don't have a proper attorney. You've been recommended to me by a friend. What do you say? Help out a fool?" What? Countess? Well. "Fine," Geralt says. "Let's talk fees."

-Jaskier is a lot and when the divorce is through and all aspects of their working relationship are settled, Geralt calls his babysitter - Yen's always happy to jump in on short notice - and invites his colleagues Lambert and Eskel to get drunk. Jaskier was annoying and exhausting, constantly babbling and flirting with Geralt and, god, he never wants to see him again.

-Of course, Geralt sees him again. By the time he does - half a year after the first time - Geralt has almost forgotten about Jaskier and his stupid Countess and how utterly drained that job left him. Jaskier sounds cheerful on the phone, not at all the common cadence for Geralt's clients, and comes into the office with two Macchiatos and a box of donuts; disgruntled, but unable to say no to sugar, Geralt allows for them to have the coffee over their conversation about Jaskier's upcoming divorce and it makes it more bearable. "So," Geralt says. "Give me a rough outline of the situation." Just to be prepared. Jaskier grins, wipes a sprinkle off his lips and takes a sip of coffee. "This is going to sound ridiculous, but hear me out. So about two months after you helped me last time, the Countess de Stael gave me a call..." Geralt wants to smack the man when he is done his well-embellished tale. Jaskier is obviously being used. But he's not here to judge, he's here to do his job and Jaskier pays well.

-The third is a woman called Molly. Geralt never gets to meet her, Jaskier never talks about her, it is as though she doesn't exist as more than a job to get done, a contract to fulfill. Aside from the topic of his soon to be ex-wife, Jaskier is more talkative than usual. He asks questions about Geralt's personal life, talks about his job - of course he's a broadway performer, 'star' doesn't quite apply - lingers. Geralt finds he... doesn't mind this time. It's nice to socialize for a bit, even if it is within the general bounds of his job. Jaskier makes him laugh somehow.

-"You should give me a discount," Jaskier jokes when he's there to leave a paycheck for Geralt for the fourth time (that Countess again, Geralt doesn't understand how they got married three times in a span of two years (in addition to that Molly woman)). "I don't give out discounts," Geralt replies. - "Why not? I'm a loyal customer, you should have a system for this." - "Mr. Pankratz, do you realize that you are the only person I know who goes through this many marriages in such a short amount of time?" - "Always knew I was special," Jaskier laughs and leaves with a small wave.

-"Okay, Geralt, what the hell?" Lambert asks, strutting in after Jaskier's gone with a bad temper written across his face. "Who is this man? And why does he keep coming back? You know I can hear his voice from my office. So if, like, you're having some sort of strange workplace affair, cut it the fuck out." - "He's just an idiot who keeps getting married," Geralt says and waves Lambert away. He doesn't add that he kind of starts to miss the idiot.

-Priscilla is very nearly a different story, something Geralt only finds out after the fact. Jaskier breaks down before their court appointment, sobbing into Geralt's shoulder that he can't do it, he can't let her go, why doesn't she want him; by that point Geralt has known Jaskier for almost four years and the thought of him staying in a marriage for longer than half of one makes him queasy, gives him little bursts of pain against his breastbone; in truth, he's glad Priscilla's leaving Jaskier, antsy that it took almost a year for them to split up; she approaches him after the divorce is through, while Jaskier's in the courthouse bathroom crying his eyes out. "Tell him I'm sorry," Priscilla says and Geralt scowls at her. "Tell him I wouldn't have left him if I didn't have to. Tell him to wait for me." She leaves and Geralt doesn't even know why he should be the one to relay that message to Jaskier and so he doesn't. Jaskier never mentions her again.

-The sixth time is the Countess de Stael again and Geralt already prepared his case from the e-mail Jaskier sent ahead. The last three times all went in favour of the noblewoman who was able to protect her fortune, but Geralt thinks he can make a case for emotional manipulation and get Jaskier at least a sizable indemnity. "Mr. Pankratz," Geralt says when Jaskier comes for their appointment. "Are you ever going to call me Jaskier?" Jaskier replies with a sigh and drops into the chair. His hair is tousled, there are deep half-moons under his eyes which look like he spent the whole night crying. Geralt's heart feels bruised, but he can't get involved dammit. "That would be inappropriate," he grunts. They get to work and Jaskier walks out with a broken-heart and a swollen bank account.

-"When will you give up on that woman?" Geralt asks when Jaskier saunters into his office one Friday, not three months after the last divorce. It's late afternoon and Geralt's ready for a weekend of watching Disney movies with Ciri, but Jaskier's always a sight for sore eyes these days. Not for the first time does Geralt consider asking him out for coffee, but the fact that he's only ever seeing Geralt because he's in need of a(nother) divorce somehow poses a barrier. "Now that is not very professional of you. To answer your question: right now. That's why I'm here." And for the first time with these two, it's Jaskier that wants the divorce, Jaskier that takes the initiative. He's only ever been the one to get dumped. Geralt's up all night thinking about that.

-For an entire year, Jaskier does not return and that annoys Geralt. He finds himself fretting, distracted, hoping Jaskier will turn up with another marriage to be dealt with, but he doesn't. The thought that Jaskier might have found someone he wants to stay with makes him physically ill. His code of conduct forbids him from using Jaskier's contact info though. Maybe this is for the best and anyway, Geralt is down to earth while Jaskier is... well, Jaskier. An emotional roller-coaster. He has his daughter and his horse and all is well. Only it isn't because Geralt managed to fall in love with Jaskier. (When Lambert and Eskel find out they laugh at him for two hours straight)

-Jaskier does turn up eventually, but not to get divorced again. He waits outside the building where Geralt works with two cups of coffee in hand and a tired smile. Geralt lets himself be led to a nearby bench, lets Jaskier speak. "I considered proposing to random strangers just to have another botched marriage for you to get me out of," Jaskier says. "But that would have been rather inconsiderate and there are easier ways to see you." - "I thought you might have found one that sticks," Geralt replies, tracing the rim of his coffee cup with a finger. "I might have." Jaskier winks at Geralt and Geralt decides to throw caution to the wind. He leans over and kisses Jaskier's lips, then mutters, "I don't ever want to see you in my office again." - "And here I thought that your desk would make such a great hmph..." Geralt shuts him up with another kiss. It feels right.

#jaskier #geralt #geraskier #gerlion #geralt x jaskier #the witcher #witcher #modern au #headcanon #cw swear words #lambert #priscilla #countess de stael #geralt of rivia #this was fun to imagine #things I'm never going to write #my geraskier dream AUs

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marvelousbutterfly · 2 years

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Keeping a secret is harder than it seems

By @marvelousbutterfly for @spideyykid @friendly-neighborhood-exchange

Read on ao3

Rating: General Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Michelle Jones/Peter Parker, Avengers Team & Peter Parker, May Parker & Peter Parker Characters: Peter Parker, Tony Stark, May Parker, Michelle Jones, Avengers Team Summary: "So, how are things with your friends at school?" he asked at some point.

"What do you mean?" Peter questioned defensively, panicking for a second. Had the man figured it out? He wondered.

"Uuh" Tony uttered, "I mean: what have you guys been up to?"

"Oh" the boy said, letting out a relieved sigh. "You know, just talking about Star Wars and stuff. Nothing much" he answered as casually as he could, leaning onto the work station.

or in which Peter is hiding something and Tony is trying his best to be supportive.

Peter worked on his web formula in Tony's lab, trying his best to not seem as anxious as he was. Judging by the unconvinced look on Tony's face, though, it was clear that the man could sense that there was something going on. Throughout the day his mentor would ask some questions casually, trying to pry some information out of the boy.

"So, how are things with your friends at school?" he asked at some point.

"What do you mean?" Peter questioned defensively, panicking for a second. Has the man figured it out? He wondered.

"Uuh" Tony uttered, "I mean: what have you guys been up to?"

"Oh" the boy said, letting out a relieved sigh. "You know, just talking about Star Wars and stuff. Nothing much" he answered as casually as he could, leaning onto the work station.

"Okay, out with it, kid" his mentor finally said, "What's going on?"

"Out with what?" the boy asked, feigning innocence.

"With the whole act. You've been acting strangely lately. What's going on?"

"Nothing's going on. Just… you know - uh - finals" he said, stumbling over his words.

Tony didn't look convinced, but still, he just nodded and let it go. He figured that Peter would tell him eventually.

_____________________________________________________________

A few days later, the Avengers were all in the living room chatting, when Peter got out of the elevator talking on the phone, looking nervous. The adults frowned with a mix of concern and curiosity.

"No, you're right, that wouldn't work" the boy said, running his fingers through his messy curls. "What about chocolate?" he asked, his voice fading as he walked out of the room and into the hallway that led to the bedrooms.

The remainder of the team looked at each other, as if searching for answers regarding the younger one's behavior, but no one said a thing.

_____________________________________________________________

The next day, Tony asked Peter again if he was okay, and the boy answered quickly, trying to change the subject. He seemed jittery and agitated the entire day, and his mentor felt more and more concerned.

"Is it that boy from school again? Brian?" the man asked at some point after seeing Peter stare at a wall for too long, his leg moving up and down at a fast pace.

"Ryan" he corrected, then shaked his head when Tony perked up, seeing that as an answer to his question. "No, he hasn't really bothered me lately."

"Then what is going on with you?"

Peter opened his mouth as if to answer, but then his spidey-senses picked up on a few voices coming from the hallway - which sounded like Clint and Sam - and he stopped. No, the Avengers couldn't know about it, they would embarrass him so much.

"Nothing" he said.

Tony decided to drop the subject for the next few days, until Wednesday arrived and he saw how anxious Peter seemed. He had to talk to the boy.

The man knocked on the door of his room, but quickly opened it when he heard a frustrated groan coming from inside, followed by the sound of something falling.

"Pete?" he asked worriedly as he entered the teen's bedroom, only to find him sitting on his bed in front of the wardrobe, head in his hands and a pile of clothes on the floor, along with a small black jewelry box in the shape of a heart. "What's wrong, Roo?" he asked, rubbing his hand softly on the boy's shoulder, trying to soothe him.

Peter turned his head towards his mentor, mouth tightened in a line as he frowned.

"Why do I only own stupid clothes?"

"What do you mean 'stupid'? We all love your science shirts" the man said sincerely.

"But other people don't" the boy retorted, "I should have some nice clothes, at least for special occasions"

That made Tony lift his eyebrows curiously.

"Is there a special occasion?" he asked, and Peter blushed. "Come on, kid, you know you can talk to me about anything"

"My friend from school, MJ, she- she" he said, mumbling the rest of the sentence quietly.

"She what? You gotta say it" the man teased, nudging the boy's shoulder. Peter took a deep breath.

"She asked me out on a date" he blurted out, looking at the floor as he felt his entire face heat up.

"Hey, that's great! That's awesome, buddy!" Tony said, beaming up at the news.

Peter smiled timidly and Tony couldn't help but smile too.

"You really like her, huh?"

"Yeah" the boy answered with a sigh, "I really do"

"Is that why you've been acting weird lately?" Tony asked.

"Sort of" Peter answered, shrugging his shoulders, "I was trying to think of a way to ask her out, because Ned said he was sure she liked me too"

"And she does, apparently," Tony said.

"Yeah" Peter agreed, before he laughed lightly, "Ned has been gloating about it ever since she asked me out" he said, and his mentor laughed.

"I bet he has" he said, before he remembered why he entered the boy's room in the first place. "So you're worried that she won't like your clothes?" he asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

Peter nodded, embarrassment clear on his face as he looked at the floor.

"They're too silly and nerdy" he spat out.

"But that's what she sees you in everyday and she still liked you enough to ask you out" Tony said comfortingly, "Besides, the most important thing about this date is not how either of you look, but how much you enjoy each other's company"

Peter smiled, but then it turned into a mischievous smirk.

"I guess time really does make you wise" he teased.

"Who are you calling old?" Tony asked in fake disbelief.

"I never said that word" the boy retorted innocently, laughing as the man stared back at him dumbfounded.

"You're lucky I'm a nice guy, so I'm still going to help you find a nice outfit for your date" Tony said teasingly as he stood up to start looking through the boy's clothes.

_____________________________________________________________

Peter looked at himself in the mirror, smiling as he realized he actually looked nice. Tony had helped him pick out a nice outfit: a pair of blue jeans, a white t-shirt with images of beakers and test tubes, filled with different colors, and a red plaid flannel on top, along with his white converse.

He applied some more pomade to his curly hair, as his mentor had convinced him to not gel it straight, then looked at the mirror once again and walked out of the room.

When he entered the living room, his eyes widened as he saw all of the Avengers on the couches, looking at him and smiling, some even whistling teasingly at the boy, who laughed and rolled his eyes. His aunt was also there, smiling as she took in the way he looked.

"Of course you told them" he said, directed at Tony.

"Well, I couldn't let my kid go to his first real date and not brag about it" he said, smiling proudly at the boy.

The team congratulated him with hugs, pats on the back and wishes of good luck.

Tony gave him a hug and some fatherly advice.

"Just be yourself, buddy" he said looking into the boy's eyes, "You're an awesome kid, and since she asked you on this date, she definitely knows it"

Aunt May gave him a kiss on the cheek and then pinched it.

"Gosh, I can't believe my baby is going on a date" she said fondly, before her face turned serious as she pointed a finger at the boy, "You better respect that girl like I taught you."

"Of course I will, Aunt May" he said, and she smiled, "Plus, if I didn't respect her she would kick my ass" he admitted.

_____________________________________________________________

Peter arrived at the bookstore they had agreed to meet at, and he nervously paced on the sidewalk, tapping the small jewelry box he had brought. Suddenly, the door to the bookstore opened, and MJ walked out and Peter could only stare at her, speechless. She was wearing a flowery dress that flowed to her ankles, and her combat boots covered her feet, making the outfit look perfect for her personality. He smiled and waved timidly at her, and she waved back.

They both stood there, seemingly taking turns between staring at each other and looking at the floor, blushing.

"So, do you wanna come in?" she asked, motioning to the door of the store.

"Uh- yeah, yeah, of course!" Peter said, almost too quickly, and she laughed softly.

The boy opened the door, motioning for MJ to enter, who rolled her eyes but smiled gratefully nonetheless. The pair roamed through the store, looking at the different books, while occasionally asking some questions or talking about random things. Slowly, they started to come out of their shells, acting like they did around each other at school.

Peter insisted on paying for the two books MJ had picked, so she paid for the boy's book as well so the both of them could be equal. Peter smiled fondly at that. Gosh, she's amazing, he thought.

After leaving the bookstore, they picked some juice from a local place and walked around the nearby park, eventually intertwining their fingers between them, rocking their hands back and forth. When they sat down on the grass beneath the freshening shadow of a large tree, Peter decided that it was the right moment to give MJ the present he had bought for her.

"What's this?" she asked curiously after she opened the small box with a smile, revealing a small dark gray chain, which contained a leaf-shaped charm on one end and a flower, all in the same color as the chain.

"It's a bookmark" Peter answered, "It's not a Black Dahlia like the murder case you're interested in, but I thought it looked very pretty, so you might still like it" he rambled.

MJ smiled at him, before looking at the chain once again, taking it out of the box to analyze it better.

"I love it" she said looking into the boy's eyes to show she was being honest. In return, he smiled wide, relief clear on his face.

The girl slowly pulled him into an awkward but soft hug.

"Thank you," she said.

The teens looked at each other, smiling, and after a while they both leaned in, sharing an awkward and quick peck, which made them both smile as their cheeks blushed.

_____________________________________________________________

The next week, Tony threw a small Christmas party - which was actually small, to everyone's surprise -, and the man had insisted that Peter invited Ned and MJ, since everyone wanted to meet the girl.

She was shy in the beginning, but still blunt enough to criticize some of the Avengers actions in the past, though she did so politely. Everyone liked her, and she bonded quite well with Natasha, as they shared similar opinions on many topics.

Peter could sense it was all too good to be true, though, and he soon was proven right once Tony and May started sharing embarrassing stories of Peter, both from when he was little and in recent days. Ned laughed and teased his friend, sharing some other stories himself, since they were friends since they were little. MJ laughed too, clearly amused, but she held his hand and smiled at him to show she wasn't bothered by his embarrassing moments.

The rest of the party went well. They all exchanged gifts and stories, eating some traditional holiday food, even though it was still early December.

When MJ's ride arrived to take her home, Peter walked her to the entrance to the Tower as they still held their hands together.

"You have a great family, Peter" she said, as she stopped next to the car, looking at the boy, who smiled.

"Yeah, they're kinda embarrassing, but pretty great" he said, and MJ laughed.

The girl then leaned in and kissed Peter's cheek, before looking back at him with a shy smile as she noticed the blush on his cheeks.

"Good night" she said, entering the car and waving at him.

"Good night."

#the friendly neighborhood exchange #friendly neighborhood exchange #friendly neighborhood fic exchange #butterfly writes #irondad fic #iron dad #spideychelle

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arvandus · 3 years

Text

Touch (pt 9) - Amity

PAIRING: Dabi x Fem!Reader

STORY WARNINGS: 18+ only please! Drug abuse/withdrawal, adult language/themes, heavy angst, past trauma/abuse, anxiety/panic attacks, PTSD, fluff, pining, slow burn, eventual emotional SMUT. *please pay attention to the chapter tags as these warnings will apply at different times*

CHAPTER WARNINGS: talk of killing, blood, needle/medical sewing; pining... lots of resistant pining. Typical sensory overload due to quirk use.

CHAPTER SONG: Ocean Eyes by Billie Eilish

Part 1 Part 8

Artwork credit to @hellowon31 on Twitter (https://twitter.com/hellowon31)

Part 9: Amity

Between your second night in a row of poor sleep and waking up incredibly early, it didn’t take long for exhaustion to find you again. By mid-day your sensory overload had subsided enough that you collapsed into your bed, dreamless sleep dragging you under instantly. It was short-lived, however; it felt like no sooner had your head hit the pillow, that a knock on your door roused you groggily from your slumber.

Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you stood up and answered the door to see Toga standing in front of you, a bloodied washcloth held to her temple.

“Oh my god, what happened to you??” you exclaimed, as you let her into your room.

“I was out running some errands and a thug tried to jump me in an alleyway.” Toga replied cheerfully. She halted in her tracks. “Oh… aren’t you still sick with the flu?” She instantly covered her mouth and nose with her free hand, taking a step back.

“Huh? Oh!” you exclaimed. Right. Crap. You forgot about that little white lie. “Sorry, hang on a sec.” You quickly went to your medical bag and pulled out a white disposable mask, placing it over your face. “Is that better?” You asked, your voice muffled.

The tension in Toga’s shoulders instantly left, her posture easing as her hand dropped away from her face. “Yeah, thanks. Are you feeling okay? I could try to do this myself this time…”

You balked at the thought of Toga treating her own injuries.

“I’m fine right now, I promise.” You replied.

The blonde shrugged and fully entered your space, although her folded hands in front of her body communicated she didn’t want to touch anything.

“So, a guy jumped you in an alley?” You asked.

“Yeah. He was big, too. And had a quirk that gave him extra reach on his arms.” Toga explained.

You weren’t quite sure what sort of errands required Toga to be in alleyways, but you had a feeling none of them were good. The curiosity pulled at you - you could feel the question on your lips, but you swallowed it down. When you had first joined the League, you and Shigaraki had discussed the importance of compartmentalizing your role from the others. You were the only one out of the group who was defenseless after all, so as the weakest link within the League, you had both decided it would be best if you knew as little of the League’s affairs as possible, in case you ever got captured and questioned. You were allowed to participate in general discussions regarding the League’s next moves and what areas were important to you that you wanted to focus on, but the nitty gritty details were kept separate: private meetings with other villains, locations, times, that sort of thing. So, despite your curiosity, you knew not to pry.

Instead, you asked, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she replied, “but I can’t get this to stop bleeding.”

“Let’s take a look.” You gingerly removed the cloth from the wound to see a deep gash in the skin before new blood filled up. You placed the washcloth back over the wound before it could spill over. “Hm. Better keep that on there. You’re going to need stitches.”

“I figured.” She grinned. She took over holding the cloth to her head while you grabbed your medical bag. You escorted her into your bathroom and had her sit on the toilet seat. Her outfit was speckled with blood, some of it from her wound, and, you suspected, some of it not.

“So…” you started, as you washed your hands in the sink. “What happened to the thug?”

“I drained him.” She replied cheerfully. The casualness of her statement filled you with a confusing mixture of fear and pity.

“You killed him?” you asked, as you prepped your needle and thread.

Toga looked at you with her yellow feline-like eyes. “He would have killed me if I didn’t.”

“Tilt your head back.” You instructed. Toga did as you said, and you carefully removed the cloth before placing your fingers over her open wound. She winced slightly at the contact, but quickly relaxed as your quirk soaked in.

Silence filled the room as you cleaned her wound with antiseptic and set to work. The heavy quiet dragged on as your mind mulled over the girl next to you. You had a thousand questions in your mind, but none of them seemed very appropriate to ask, not without upsetting her. And despite your good standing with the League, you made it a careful point not to get on anyone’s bad side. It wasn’t so much that you didn’t trust them, although a part of you was always wary around those who were willing to commit violence. But you also understood on a personal level that the problems these villains had went far deeper than society was willing to acknowledge. Mental illness, quirkology, environment… all of it played a role in dealing the hand that these outcast individuals had been dealt.

Minutes passed as you stitched up the cut and cleaned the blood from the sealed wound once more. You were washing your hands when Toga finally spoke, her voice soft. “Are you mad at me?”

You paused to look down at her. Her brow was furrowed, her mouth pulled into a sulky frown as she stared at her hands. She looked like a child waiting to be scolded, and in that moment, you could see how young she still was. You gave a soft sigh. “Of course not. He attacked you, right? You had to defend yourself.”

You paused then followed up with, “I’m sorry you had to do it.”

“Don’t be…” she replied. “I liked killing him.”

Your hands faltered as you began putting away your supplies and Toga noticed.

“You don’t like it, do you?” she asked, accusation lacing her voice. She was defensive, waiting for your judgement.

You couldn’t blame her. No doubt her quirk was something she likely struggled with all of her life before finally giving in to it. She had never given you her story directly, but it wasn’t hard to guess. Everything about her – from her ramblings to her actions - spoke of a caged animal who finally got a taste of freedom and refused to be captured.

Contradicting feelings warred within you, and you struggled to wrangle them. You had to admit, you hated the idea of her killing. More importantly, you knew that her victims weren’t always street thugs, villains, or corrupted heroes. But at the same time, despite this uncomfortable fact, you also understood how strongly quirks affected behavior, how it could act like a poison, messing with the mind and forcing its way into being expressed. It wasn’t the first time you’d seen it; you understood it intimately.

You looked down at her and a familiar sense of pity unfurled in your gut, snaking into your veins, pulling at your emotions even as your core roiled at the idea of needless violence. She was just like him... a victim in her own way, despite the horrific things she did.

“You think I’m a monster.” Her words cut through your thoughts, and your attention refocused on her. She had her knees hugged up to her chest, her feet propped on the closed toilet lid that she occupied. You mentally scolded yourself for abandoning her as you got lost in your head and crouched down next to her.

“No. I don’t think you’re a monster.” You answered soothingly.

“Then why do you look scared of me?” Toga demanded.

You gave her a smile that you hoped reached your eyes. She was more perceptive than you gave her credit for sometimes. You had to choose your words carefully.

“I’m not scared of you.” You explained. “ But I am a healer, Toga. I see someone who’s hurt, and I want to take that pain away. It’s what my quirk is. It’s a part of who I am and it’s what motivates me. So, I won’t deny that it’s hard for me sometimes to understand why you do what you do because it’s so opposite of how I am.”

Toga averted her eyes, her body tightening in on itself.

“But…” you continued as you placed a hand on her forearm, “I’m not scared of you. And even though you do monstrous things, I don’t think you’re a monster.”

Toga slowly lowered her knees, letting her feet touch the floor as she stared at you. “Why not?” she asked.

“Because,” you replied, “You still care about people. You and Twice were the first to welcome and befriend me when I joined the League. And the way you take care of Twice… like he’s your big brother… that counts for something. You even care about Dabi, even though he’s an ass. That was why you checked on him that night, right? You treat each of us like family. Now why would a monster do that?”

“But I still want to cut you guys all the time…” she confessed.

“I know. But you don’t. That should count for something.”

Toga smiled at you with teary eyes. “You’re so nice, big sis.” Her compliment made you smile.

Toga hopped of the toilet with a nimble bounce, signaling the end of the conversation. “Am I all done?”

You nodded. “You’re free to go.” You announced. Toga made her way to your bedroom door, but she halted when you called her name. “Toga… don’t forget to change your clothes.”

Toga looked down at the bloodstains splattered across her school uniform. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. Thanks, big sis!”

She left your room with a jovial wave. As soon as the door closed behind her, you slumped down onto your bed as you removed the white mask from your face and placed it on your nightstand. Exhaustion washed over you again, deeper this time than it was before. It wasn’t even so much due to your quirk since you didn’t have to use very much of it this time. Instead, your mind focused on Toga, replaying the conversation. It filled you with a swath of competing emotions; pity, anger, frustration, helplessness, fear. The feelings swirled in you making a rank stew in your soul, old and familiar.

This was just like before.

You shoved the feelings aside, unwilling to look too closely at them. You already had enough on your plate as it was… you didn’t want to dredge up more of the past. It would only add more stress and it wouldn’t change anything.

You laid down again in the hopes that this time, finally, your sleep would be nightmare free and uninterrupted.

* * * * *

The withdrawal-induced restlessness Dabi felt lasted throughout the day, making sleep near impossible. To keep himself from going crazy, he forced his energy into cleaning up his space, despite his typical disdain for chores. He straightened up his desk, took out the trash, and most importantly, did his laundry. It was overflowing and stank of mildew, and he was in desperate need of clean towels. His bed was no better, reeking of sweat and infection and covered in chip crumbs. But while his body appreciated the movement, the lack of mental power the activities required did little to distract from intrusive, obsessive thoughts.

He wasn’t sure which thoughts he wanted to avoid more - thoughts of his family or thoughts of you. The memories of family were old and familiar, but the emotions in them were raw, threatening to suck him in and shred him to pieces like it’d already done so many times before. But thoughts of you weren’t much better, at least not to Dabi. He didn’t like the warmth he felt each time he thought of you, and yet he kept going back to that feeling, like opening the fridge to stare at that last piece of cake. He was at war with himself, and he didn’t know how to fight it.

Somehow, with all of his coming and going from his room, he somehow managed to never run into you. He wasn’t entirely sure if that was a good thing or not, but like all other uncomfortable thoughts, his forced himself not to focus on it. It shouldn’t be important. You shouldn’t be important. His mouth pressed into a thin line. The number of times he had to tell himself that were becoming too many to count, and it never did seem to make much difference.

The cleaning only occupied him for so long. Towards the end of it he found himself sitting in his room, waiting for his clothes to finish drying so he could retrieve them. He had laid back on his bed just for a moment, to stare at his phone. He woke up an hour and a half later, his mind muddled with jumbled dreams and memories. Cigarette smoke, a child’s laughter, the sound of himself screaming in agony…

He shook his head to knock the unwanted fog from his brain and grabbed a smoke to soothe the shaking in his hands. The cigarette was gone within a minute. The haze still lingered though as every inch of Dabi’s nerves hummed and his gut clenched in discomfort. So, he inhaled a second cigarette for good measure and followed it up with an electrolyte drink paired with a couple of antacids. His laundry was likely done now; no point in letting it sit there and risk another League member touching his things.

With the laundry dry and sitting on his bed in a crumpled heap, he stared at the contents, a frown on his face. Your towels were mingled with his, and the sight of it filled him with an uneasiness that had little to do with his withdrawal. It looked entirely alien to him, intrusive in his personal space. His stomach gave a weird flutter before giving way to a wave of nausea.

Stupid, he thought to himself. They’re just fucking towels.

He began folding the first towel. It was half-assed in its effort and one hundred percent intentional, as if giving careful care to your items would give away something about himself he wanted to keep secret. But even as he did so, intrusive curiosity crept into his mind. How did you fold your towels?

Idiot. He caught his wandering mind and reeled it back in forcefully, but it did little good. His mind was a master escape artist, running away to explore other unwanted thoughts without his permission as soon as his mental back was turned.

As he folded your items, his hands slowed slightly in their actions, taking in the feel of cotton on his fingers. He watched as he rolled the soft material between his thumb and forefinger while memories bubbled forth, broken and vague. Waking up in the shower, sitting on the toilet with your towel over his head, feeling of your hands working the cotton over his wet hair. He tried not to think of your face, but of course not wanting it made it appear in his mind. He remembered your eyes, the concern in them, and the memory filled him with a warmth that he was still struggling to understand, even as he tried to deny its presence.

It was short-lived – the memory of your tender gaze soon faded away to a terrified one, and now he was remembering your scar. A new thought came into his mind then, dark and plaguing. The look of fear you’d given him that night - did you wear that same frightened expression on your face when you were burned, marked by whatever asshole laid their hands on you?

Dabi could feel his body temperature begin to rise.

The last towel was folded, and he swiftly grabbed the pile and shoved it on top of his dresser as if were contaminated. Contaminated with memories, contaminated with you…

He faltered for a moment, his anger disrupted by that strange sense of guilt that gnawed at him. The unwelcome mental picture of you cowering in fear as flames licked your skin danced in his imagination. No wonder you had been so utterly terrified of him that night. No wonder you’d been unable to look him in the eyes the next day…

Dabi caught himself staring at your things and forced himself to turn around to finish his laundry. He folded his clothes swiftly, not caring whether or not they were done nicely before shoving them into the dresser drawer. Then, with his clean towels in his arm, he went into the bathroom to give himself that much-needed shower.

* * * * *

You woke up feeling groggier than usual as the orange-red glow of the late afternoon haze filtered into your room. As predicted, your sleep was restless and riddled with hazy uncomfortable dreams that instantly began to fade away as soon as you opened your eyes. You sighed in annoyance as dissatisfaction slinked across your tired skin. It was as if you had slept the entire time with your body tensed, ready to run at a moment’s notice, and now you were feeling the effects.

You got out of bed with a stretch to ease the stiffness in your muscles. Maybe something to eat and drink could lift your spirits and wake your body up. You slipped on your shoes and opened the door before remembering to grab your mask off of your nightstand. Then, you left your room to trudge downstairs.

The smell of pizza greeted you as soon as you stepped out onto the main floor, and your stomach growled in response, your mouth watering.

“Y/N!” Toga cheered. “Did you take a nap?”

You frowned as your hand self-consciously went to your messy hair. Was it really that obvious?

“Yeah, I was pretty tired.” You confessed, as you tried to fix your stray strands.

“Are you feeling any better?” Magne asked. You could tell she was asking about the ‘flu’ you were supposed to have.

You shrugged. “Yeah, a little…”

“And how about Dabi? You were treating him too, right?” Magne continued.

You felt embarrassment bubble in you, and you scratched at your cheek as a distraction. “He’s doing okay… I think it’s hitting him harder, though. He’s probably going to need some more time to recover.”

“He came down here yesterday without a mask and everything.” Spinner grumbled. “Then decided to take a stroll. He couldn’t be that bad, could he?”

You shrugged. “Stomach bugs are weird and vary from person to person.”

Shigaraki’s voice surprised you from behind. “How’s his burn?”

He knew about that…? Maybe Dabi said something the day before. Either way, no point in lying about it now…

“It’s doing well... but it’s not completely healed yet.”

Shigaraki grunted and grabbed a slice of pizza from the open box sitting on the bar.

“Hey, Y/N! You want some pizza?” Twice offered.

“Yes, that’d be-“

“She can’t eat pizza when she has the flu!” Toga scolded. “She might throw it up. She needs something simple!”

Your heart sank. No pizza??

“No, it’s okay…” you started, your eyes staring at the perfect slice.

“I’ll go make you something, okay big sis?” Toga chirped as she bounded lightly towards the small kitchen behind the bar.

Oh… oh no….

“Oh, um… it’s okay Toga, I’m not really hungry…” you tried to call after her, but she was already gone and out of earshot.

You fiddled with your hands nervously. Cooking was not one of Toga’s strong suits. Fortunately, Kurogiri was present, watching the exchange.

“I’ll make sure she doesn’t burn down the kitchen.” He commented, as he followed after her.

You stood there awkwardly, strongly contemplating grabbing the entire pizza box and running away with it. But you’d just had that personal exchange with Toga earlier, so abandoning her when she was trying to do something nice for you probably wouldn’t go over well.

Damn it. You were too nice for your own good sometimes.

On defeated feet, you walked over to the couch and sat down next to Compress who was reading a book. He put the item down as you sat next to him and gave you a smile. “How nice of you to grace me with your company, little flower.”

You crossed your arms and sulked into the couch cushions, wishing they would swallow you up. “Toga is cooking for me.”

“Oh dear, so I heard.” He commented. “However, Kurogiri is supervising her. Perhaps this time it won’t be so bad.”

“Kurogiri doesn’t eat.” You pointed out.

“True,” he laughed. “But perhaps you set your standards too high. I never said he’d ensure that the food is good; however, his assistance may ensure that it is edible.”

“Don’t you use logic on me, Mr.” you replied, even as you tried to suppress a smile.

“Then perhaps a magic trick then?” he offered. “As a distraction.”

“Sure.” You grinned.

A few minutes later, Toga came out with two steaming bowls sitting on a rectangular tray.

“Oh good! You’re still here!” Toga smiled. “I made you soup!”

You stifled a groan as you stood up and stared at the contents. It… didn’t look bad…. It looked like it was canned soup at least, which, all things considered, were one of the simplest things to make. Still, it had that a slight burned odor to it when the steam reached your nose.

“Why are there two bowls?” you asked.

“Oh! One’s for you and one’s for Dabi.” Toga explained. Behind her, Magne chuckled at the table. “He hasn’t come down to eat yet today so he’s probably hungry.”

“It was my suggestion.” Kurogiri stated. “You are still sick after all, so it would be in the League’s interest if you and Dabi had your meals in your rooms until you are no longer contagious.”

“Maybe it can be like a little dinner date!” Toga added.

You fought the flush of hot heat that seemed to take over your insides. “A what?”

The last thing you needed was the League thinking you and Dabi were dating.

The blonde girl giggled as she handed you the tray. Her hands instantly went up to her hot cheeks, her eyes glazed over with infatuation. “What I wouldn’t give to have a private dinner date with Izuku!”

“Oh geez, not this again…” Spinner grumbled.

“Hey!” Toga shot at him. “It’s rude to tease a girl in love!”

You were grateful that Toga was easily distracted, and you took the opportunity to make your escape. “O-Okay. I guess I’ll go take this upstairs then… Thank you, Toga.” You mumbled.

You walked out of the room quickly, the soup sloshing in the bowls and threatening to spill. But you wanted to get out of there before things got even more awkward. Toga wasn’t even the real concern – the real concern was Magne. Her chuckle had not gone unnoticed by you, and she was a master conversationalist when she wanted to be. The last thing you needed was more intrusive questions or implied statements, especially with everyone there to listen in.

You took the stairs instead of the elevator, not trusting the old rust bucket to run smooth enough with bowls of hot soup in front of you.

Dinner date. You wanted to laugh. Dabi certainly wasn’t the type to do dinner dates. In fact, Dabi probably didn’t even date. He probably just hooked up with random girls whenever he felt like it.

Your stomach tightened into an uncomfortable knot.

It didn’t matter. You weren’t his type anyway. And he shouldn’t be yours, not with all of his baggage. And boy, did he seem to have a lot of baggage. Besides, he didn’t need the pressure of someone pining over him while he struggled to keep himself together. He needed someone he could trust. He needed a friend.

You felt yourself start to calm as you centered yourself on that single fact. He needed a friend. You could do that. You’d already committed yourself to it.

You made it to your own room and set the tray on the floor outside your door so you could go in and grab your medical bag. If you were going to take soup to Dabi, then you might as well treat his wounds and give him his pills. It was about time for it anyway. With your bag slung onto your shoulder and the tray once again in your hand, you went over to his door and knocked.

It opened and you froze, eyes wide, as a warm humid air wrapped you up in the scent of shampoo and body wash.

Dabi stood before you in nothing but a pair of grey sweatpants that left little to the imagination. Shit. It hadn’t even been a full five seconds and you were already staring at his crotch. Hot embarrassment flooded you as you averted your eyes, only to get stuck on his glistening, bare form. You’d seen him shirtless many times, had your hands on his body, even… but something about this moment was different. Maybe it was the shower. Maybe it was the simple - yet absolutely sinful - sweatpants. Or maybe it was how he seemed to be carrying himself in this moment, like he was the king of his domain. He was a living art piece, every angle of him stunning from the slope of his shoulders to the cut of his lean waist. Even his stitches looked beautiful, the light bouncing off of them like gems. Whatever it was, Dabi seemed to be a thousand times hotter than you remember him being, and it left your brain feeling dumb as hot desire washed over you.

You were staring. You knew you were staring but you couldn’t break the trance he seemed to put you in. Your eyes took in the cut of his cheekbones, the slope of his nose, the shape of his lips. Aqua blue eyes stared at you in knowing amusement, grabbing you like the tide and pulling you in. You could feel yourself floundering beneath his intense gaze as you struggled to get a hold of yourself.

“Uh…” you stuttered.

You were still staring.

“Hey, Doll…” He greeted, a playful grin on his lips. His voice washed over you, and you felt lightheaded.

This was so embarrassing. If he had any doubts that you found him attractive before, then he certainly didn’t now.

“Hi.” You said dumbly.

His eyes broke contact with yours to look down. “Hey-” His hand shot out to quickly grab the tilting tray, soup splashing messily over the sides of the bowls.

“Shit! Sorry, sorry.” You cursed, as you adjusted your hold. You kept your eyes down, unable to stare at him any longer. “Can I come in?”

“Yeah.”

Was that a chuckle you heard in his voice? How dare he.

You crossed the threshold, only to find yourself even more smothered by the clean scent of his recent shower that permeated the entire space like a fog. Beneath it, the faint hint of cigarette smoke was present, but it was muted. The light in the room was dimmer than you remembered and you realized why – he had put one of his shirts over his shoddy lamp, reducing its brightness. The humid warmth in the room was paired with a strange heavy silence. Your eyes instantly checked his window and there was no billow of the curtains this time, no street noise coming forth. Your breath froze in your throat for a moment as you realized – he remembered. All the things that had bothered you this morning were modified for your arrival. A weightlessness swelled in your chest, intertwining with the attraction you were still grappling with. You set the tray down with shaky hands before wiping your sweaty palms onto your pants.

Dabi came to stand next to you with his towel on his shoulder, the warm bare skin of his chest brushing against your arm as he stared down at the bowls. With his proximity so close and your own emotions running amok, it took every ounce of mental fortitude not to hug him right then and there.

“Did you make that?” he asked, eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“Oh, uh.. Toga did.” You finally said, as you moved slightly away from his bare skin.

“We should have let the tray fall.” He stated as he stared at the contents with distaste. You couldn’t help but laugh at his comment, and it helped clear some of the brain fog. He gave you a soft glare. “Why did you even take this? You should have just said no.”

“Well, not all of us can be as nice as you, Dabi.” You teased. “Besides, she wanted to do something nice for us because she thinks we’re sick.” You explained.

“If I eat that I probably will be.” He retorted.

“Oh, come on… it’s probably not that bad… just a little smokiness to it. That shouldn’t bother you, right?” You put a spoon into a bowl and handed it to him.

He gave you a deadpan look as you held the bowl against his chest, his hands refusing to take it. “I’m not eating it.”

“Hey, if I have to eat this, then so do you.” You glared.

“Like hell.” He replied. “Besides, I already have food here.”

You set the bowl down and stared at the bags on his desk. “Yes, chips, beef jerky, and cigarettes! So healthy.”

“The three basic food groups.” He agreed with a grin. He sat down in his desk chair, his legs spread wide as he slouched back. It took extra effort to not let your eyes wander. “Tell ya what, doll… you try it first. If you don’t throw up or die, then maybe I’ll consider eating mine.”

You rolled your eyes at him and grabbed your bowl. “Fine, you big baby.”

You filled your spoon and raised it to him in a mock toast before placing it into your mouth. He watched the motion in silent amusement, his eyes focused on your lips as they closed around the spoon.

It was awful. Definitely burnt. And the parts that weren’t burnt were overcooked, making the textures all wrong in your mouth. You swallowed forcefully, suppressing a gag.

“Mmm… You look like you enjoyed that.” Dabi teased.

“Hey at least I’ve actually tried it.” You shot back. “So, I guess that means only one of us is a little bitch.”

Dabi’s eyes widened, the light in them dancing in amusement, as a grin spread across his face. “You kiss your mother with that mouth, doll? You’ve been with the League too long.”

You pointed your spoon at him. “Don’t try to act like you know me. And in case you haven’t noticed, I’m not dead. So eat up.” You picked up his bowl again and held it under his nose. By this point, you knew the soup wasn’t really that edible, but now you were determined to have him suffer with you.

The smell wafted up and he wrinkled his nose. He pushed the bowl away back towards you. “I don’t think so.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “You said you’d try it if I did.”

“I said I’d consider it.” He replied. “It’s been considered and denied.”

“You’re an ass.” You pouted. “It really is awful though…” you confessed. “and she had Kurogiri with her, too. Like… how?”

“Kurogiri doesn’t eat.” Dabi replied.

You laughed. “That’s what I told Compress!”

Your conversation was interrupted by a loud, hungry rumble in your gut.

A low chuckle rumbled from Dabi’s chest that made your heart pound and your flesh feel warm. “C’mon doll, don’t torture yourself.” He said. “Why don’t we just go get a bite to eat. There’s nothing keeping us locked up in here.”

Toga’s words echoed in your head. Dinner date. Oh geez, if she or Magne saw you two leaving the premises together, you’d never hear the end of it. The offer was tempting though, and you were pretty sure Dabi was starting to get tired of his snacks. Junk food could only satisfy for so long; at some point he needed a proper meal.

But something nagged at you as you stared at the man in front of you. He seemed to be doing okay at first glance… his recent shower certainly seemed to lift his spirits. But you had been too distracted by his attractiveness earlier that you hadn’t taken the time to really assess him. Now, you could see the exhaustion still in his face, could see the small wiggle of his leg and the drumming of his fingers on the table. You checked the time on your phone – no doubt your quirk and the pills were beginning to wear off. But how far along that was, you couldn’t really say; it was hard to tell with Dabi; he didn’t show his pain very easily.

You knew your appetite would disappear once you pushed yourself into sensory overload. But Dabi couldn’t wait, even if he might try to play it off that he could. More importantly, you didn’t want to try to deal with a withdrawal-suffering Dabi out in public. Your heart sank slightly. Goodbye delicious dinner, for the second time that night.

“…I should probably treat you first.” Your eyes landed on his bag of goods as your stomach rumbled again. “But maybe a snack would be good.” You confessed. You felt embarrassed for asking, especially after the big show you’d just point on… but pride had to take a back seat before your stomach ate itself.

His blue eyes stared at you for a long moment. You could feel your skin start to prickle under the weight of them.

“Sure, doll.” He finally said. He rummaged through one of the bags until he found what he was looking for under a bag of spicy chips. “Is this your style?”

He tossed you a prepackaged muffin about the size of a softball. You couldn’t fight the smile that blossomed across your face. “Yeah, thanks.” You opened up the wrapping and began breaking off pieces of it. “You want some?” you offered, holding the muffin towards him.

He shook his head. “Nah. Don’t feel much like eating.”

You broke off half of the muffin for him anyway. “I still need to give you your pills, so you should eat something first. Besides, this is too big for me to finish by myself anyway.”

Was it a lie? Of course. You were starving. Did Dabi know that you were lying? Of course. But he took the other half of the muffin anyway. You sat on the edge of his bed while he sat in his chair as the two of you ate together in silence for a moment. As you ate, your eyes wandered around his room.

That was when you noticed it.

“Are those my towels?” you asked.

Dabi looked over at his dresser as he stuffed the last of the muffin into his mouth. “Yeah. They’re clean now.”

“Thank you…” you replied. Your eyes scanned the room, taking in the details. “You cleaned up…”

Dabi shrugged. “Don’t sound so surprised. I’m not a complete slob.”

You stared at him as he began fidgeting with a pack of cigarettes, tapping the box on the table, flipping it over, and tapping the other end. Over and over it somersaulted, and you wondered if he was craving one right now. Why didn’t he just take one out and light it up?

Was Dabi… being considerate?

Then again, the action didn’t come as much of a surprise to you as it might have before. He’d been more willing to do small acts of kindness ever since the night of his withdrawal. Bringing ramen. Adjusting his room for your sensory overload.

Now this.

Was it fueled by guilt? Or did he actually care?

He looked like he was waiting for something. You watched as he rubbed at his scarred arm with his free hand, irritation flashing across his eyes. Of course. He was waiting for you and your quirk. You ate your muffin faster. As soon as it had disappeared into your mouth, you reached for your bag and took out the pill bottle. His eyes were on it instantly, the shaking in his leg stilled by the sight of it, his shoulders releasing some of their tension.

“Here.” You offered, handing him his pills. He took them and swallowed them dry before opening up a beverage and taking a swig.

Dabi eyed the bottle in your hand as you closed it. “That’s looking awfully low there, isn’t it?”

You put the container back in your bag, enclosing it in a zippered space. “It’ll be enough to last us through tomorrow morning.”

“That’s cutting it real close, don’tcha think?” he replied.

You looked up to see his brow furrowed in concern and offered him a reassuring smile. “It is. But I’ll be picking up the refills tomorrow before our evening session, so there’s nothing to worry about. Now let’s take a look at your back real quick.”

He stood up and dragged his chair over to where you sat and straddled the seat with his back facing you. The bandage was still on, but you could tell it had gotten wet in the shower. You’d have to be careful when changing it this time, since the bits of skin that were starting to heal might reopen.

You applied your quirk first around the bandages, then began to delicately remove the wet gauze and tape. Your fingers were cold on Dabi’s skin and a small shiver ran up his spine at the sensation of your touch. The wound didn’t show any signs of infection or fresh damage, so you continued business as usual, applying the antiseptic followed by fresh gauze. As you patched him up, your eyes kept drifting to your towels, thinking about what had happened that night. There was something important you’d been meaning to ask him. Something you had to know.

“I… have a question.” You ventured.

“Hm?” Dabi responded, his head turning slightly to the sound of your voice.

“The next day… after I helped you out that one night… was there anything… off? About you specifically?” you asked.

There was a long pause and you could tell Dabi was thinking heavily, which only made the dread in your gut sink in deeper.

“I couldn’t feel anything.” He finally admitted.

“I’m not talking about the pain. I’m talking about… I don’t know. Anything else.”

“I know.” He replied. “When I woke up, I couldn’t feel anything.”

Your brow furrowed and the dread hardened into a stone. “…what does that mean?”

“It means I didn’t care about a thing, doll. Everything was turned off.” He was facing away from you and in that moment, you wished he wasn’t – you desperately wanted to see the expression on his face. Your hands felt clammy as you processed his words.

“You mean your emotions?” you clarified. You needed to understand more. You needed to know how bad it was. “What… did it feel like?”

“Empty.”

You finished putting the last bandage on him but you barely noticed as your vision became unfocused, your thoughts whirling. Holy shit. You had turned off his emotions? You supposed in hindsight it made sense, since it was likely his memories and the emotions attached to them that were torturing him that night. Why else would he have been blabbering incoherent apologies as if he were desperately trying to atone for something? But still… the severity of that made your blood run cold. Emotions were everything, contrary to what some people might think. They fuel how people think, how they act, how they react… entire personalities – entire identities are built around how emotions are felt and how they are dealt with. You very well could have entirely erased Dabi as a person. In fact, you likely did, at least temporarily.

You swallowed the hard lump in your throat and tried to calm your panicked breathing. “…How long did it last?”

He was quiet again, and the silence was worse than anything.

“Please tell me.” You begged. “How long?”

“Hours.”

Your heart was racing and your ears ringing. Your eyes began to sting but you fought it, focusing on a patch of scarred flesh on his back to distract yourself, memorizing its pattern. You didn’t want to cry in front of him. Not again. And certainly not twice in one day. You wanted to apologize, to beg his forgiveness, but you couldn’t make the words come out, not without your emotions spilling out with them. Instead, you forced yourself into action, treating his scars with your quirk.

There was so much more you wanted to know. How did he get his emotions back? What did it feel like? Was it slow, or at all at once? Did he feel relieved?

Did it hurt?

But you couldn’t bring yourself to ask those questions, no matter how badly you wanted to know, no matter how badly you wanted to understand. They were too personal, and you could already tell by Dabi’s growing reluctance that he didn’t want to talk about it any further.

You’d apologize to him. At some point, once your emotions were under control, you’d apologize.

You finished numbing his back and shoulders, even tracing down his triceps a little. “Turn around,” you instructed.

He did as you asked, adjusting himself in the chair so he was now facing you. You avoided looking at him, the shame and guilt far too heavy for you to lift your eyes. Unbeknownst to you, a frown pulled at his brow, his lips. You wore your emotions so plainly…

You took his hand in yours and continued your quirk as your skin began to prickle and sting. The sound of the shower dripping in the bathroom was louder now. Dabi shifted slightly in his chair and the scraping sound against the floor was like nails on a chalkboard. The odors in the room went from pleasant to offensive.

“I gotta question for ya,” Dabi suddenly ventured. “Did you change my clothes that night?”

Your hands faltered and you glanced up at his face before you could catch yourself. His eyes had a glint in them you couldn’t quite place in your distracted mental state. You felt embarrassment creep across your skin.

“I did. I had to get you into the shower before you combusted.” You replied as you continued to treat him, your hands on his collarbone. The feel of it was so familiar now…

“I was naked?”

“Only for a moment!” you replied. “You were in your boxers for most of it, but I had to change you out of those after the shower.” God, this entire conversation was so embarrassing… why did he have to ask about this of all things?

“…did ya peek?” he asked.

Your mouth struggled like a fish out of water for a moment as you glared at him. “NO!” You finally exclaimed. “Of course, I didn’t! Why would you even…” but then you saw the grin on his face and you realized he was teasing you.

You playfully punched his arm. “You’re an asshole.” You fumed.

He laughed. “That didn’t even hurt.” He mocked.

“Of course it didn’t, idiot. I already used my quirk there.” You shot back. “Now stay still so I can get your damn face.”

“So feisty…” he murmured.

Shit. With your senses heightened, you could almost feel the vibration in his voice, as if he were closer to you than he actually was. For the briefest moment, it distracted you from the growing pain of your scar, from the sound of the drip drip from the bathroom shower. You wondered what it would feel like to have those words uttered against your skin, his hot breath warming your flesh, the feel of his rough lower lip brushing…

You clenched your jaw until you nearly gave yourself a headache, forcing the intrusive thoughts out of your mind. You weren’t here for this. You were here to treat him and get out of his space. You weren’t his type. You repeated it to yourself like a mantra, a prayer, a reminder to the illogical part of you that wanted to follow the lure of his voice. Why did he have to be such a flirt? It didn’t surprise you, but it certainly left you feeling confused when his actions and words sometimes contradicted themselves.

All it meant was that he was getting comfortable with you again. He was treating you like a friend, and friends teased all the time. Right?

His eyes watched you closely as your hands caressed his jaw, relieving the ache there. You seemed lost in your thoughts and while you certainly didn’t look comfortable, you also didn’t look too be too horribly in pain. You were doing better today. Still, your fingers danced quickly across his skin, skating under his eyes which he instinctively closed, and barely touching his lower lip. It happened far too quickly before the presence of you disappeared, and it left him feeling empty. How badly he wanted to grab your hands right then and put them back onto his face.

When he opened his eyes again, your own eyes were downcast as you stretched your fingers slightly.

“You okay?” he ventured. The question sounded odd coming from him, even to his own ears.

You looked up at him then, and you could see he was concerned. That’s right… he knew about your quirk and your scar now. You clasped your hands in your lap to keep them from shaking. Shaking from the pain you were feeling, shaking from the fear of your own thoughts and desires.

“I’m fine.” You lied. Did he know you were lying with this too?

He knew. In fact, you’d given him the same false words he always gave you. It was like looking into a mirror.

“You don’t gotta do the legs.” He offered. “I’m not dressed for it anyway.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” You chided. “Of course I’m going to do your legs. The better I treat you, the better you can rest. And your body needs rest to heal your burn.”

He noticed that you made no comment on his withdrawal, which a part of him appreciated; it helped him avoid the discomfort of shame that was always associated with it. Still…

“It’s not like I’m going anywhere, doll. I won’t be needing them. Besides, the drugs help.” He replied.

You eyed him for a moment, assessing. “How about I just do your calves then?” you bartered.

He assessed you in return before he gave a small half-smirk. “Deal.”

By the time you’d treated his calves down to the tops of his feet, you were definitely grateful you didn’t have to do any more.

PING……..PING……

You rubbed at the bridge of your nose, feeling the onset of a headache as you skirted just shy of overload. You closed your eyes, hoping maybe the lack of visual stimulation might make the auditory more bearable. Or at least bearable enough that you could actually move your body instead of feeling frozen. But it only made it worse, allowing your brain to hyperfixate on it. You covered your ears against it as you struggled to find your way out of it, to regain control of yourself.

While you lost yourself in your senses, Dabi watched you in displeasure. He’d made sure to have everything ready before you showed up. He even made sure not to light up a cigarette, as much as that had grated on him, since he knew the smell would linger long after. But clearly, something was bothering you. What had he missed?

He watched, waiting, giving you time to figure yourself out or ask for help while he secretly tried to decode the mystery. Your eyes were closed, your hands over your ears. Was it multiple sensory attacks? You flinched again. And again. There was a rhythm. So, it was something you were hearing.

Curiously, Dabi closed his own eyes listening for anything that stood out. Slowly, the quiet sound of water dripping greeted his ears like a whisper. He opened his eyes just in time to see your flinch match with the sound.

That was it.

“It’s the shower.” He commented.

It wasn’t a question – it was a statement. You opened your eyes and looked at him with surprise before giving a nod, your hands still over your ears. He knew his shower leaked for a bit after he used it, but he’d gotten so used to it that he just tuned out the sound by this point. But for you… especially after using your quirk on him…

Why didn’t you just get up and leave? Why stay here if it was bothering you this much? Obviously, you wanted to get away from it…

Maybe you couldn’t. Maybe, for some reason, you were stuck in what you were experiencing, unable to find your way out.

Dabi could relate to that.

And he didn’t like it.

He stood up and closed the bathroom door before returning to sit in the chair in front of you, waiting.

You could still hear it. But it was manageable now, muffled. Quieter. You could feel yourself start to process the rest of what you were feeling. The pain on your back; the feel of your clothes, your hair; the smell of Dabi’s body wash, fresh linen… cigarettes. Slowly, your hands lowered from your ears as you focused on each sense, identifying all you recognized. The world was still loud around you, but at least you could somewhat function again. Slowly, you opened your eyes to see him watching you through an unreadable expression.

“Better?” he asked.

“Much.” You replied. “Thank you. Again.”

“It’s fine.”

A heavy, awkward quiet filled the space, and in that moment, despite Dabi’s kindness, all you wanted was to be back safely in your room. Maybe it was because you were feeling overwhelmed by your own emotions, unable to properly control how your heart pounded around him, or how you couldn’t keep your eyes off him. Or maybe it was the way he kept looking at you, his expression unreadable yet his gaze intense, as if you were all that he was focused on and he was determined to discover all of your secrets.

Either way, you felt an ache grow within you, threatening to drown you. But you couldn’t focus on it, couldn’t dismantle it or bury it, not while your brain fought the senses overwhelming you. You could handle one or the other… but you couldn’t handle both.

You needed the comfort of your room; you needed your safe space.

“I’m… going to go lay down.” You said quietly, as you grabbed your bag. It felt heavy in your hand.

If Dabi noticed the shift in your mood, he didn’t say so. Instead, he stood from his seat and shoved his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants.

“Yeah. Me too.” He replied.

Despite the suddenly aloof atmosphere, he still walked you to his door. After you left, he leaned his back against the cold wood and ran his hand down his face.

So much for not caring…

________________________________________________

Part 10 ________________________________________________

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#dabi x reader #dabi #dabi x you #touch #dabi touch #soft dabi #pining #slow burn #TW: blood #TW: needles #TW: killing #TW: violence

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lilsuzn · 3 years

Text

MLQC Gavin - Fluff abc headcanons

So by the popular demand - I am back.

Just kidding. No one was asking.

Fandom: Mr. Love: Queen's Choice

Warnings: None (the reader is gender neutral)

Dedication: @marytheredqueen

A = Admiration (what do they absolutely adore about you?)

You need to trust me when I tell you that Gavin had indeed tried to find at least one thing he could dislike about you. Many times.

Yet your body seems to have no flaws. He checked quite a few times at this point.

Your heart is pure. Loving. Patient. Loyal.

Whenever you’re at his side… The world is at peace. No pain exists, nor does suffering.

You are his purpose. You are his equilibrium. Nothing matters as long as he can be by your side.

B = Body (what is their favorite part of your body?)

Your beautiful eyes.

There will never be anything more beautiful than the way they shine before your lips meet in a loving kiss.

C = Cuddling (how do they like to cuddle?)

Him on his back.

You in his arms. Laying on top of him.

Your head rests on his chest, no matter if it’s your front, side or back that presses against his muscular torso - it’s perfect.

He also likes the smell of your shampoo… it’s just intoxicating for him.

D = Dates (what does their ideal date with you look like?)

He likes doing things outside with you.

Attending festivals, engaging in new, interesting sports, indulging in some street food or picnics.

He’s a sucker for long, romantic walks too, soooooo

He takes you out to the festival. Buys all kinds of yummy food for both of you to share. Wins you an enormous plushie and then carries it around for you. While holding your hand. Tightly.

Then takes you for a night stroll, to then kiss you under the sky full of stars before you turn back.

E = Emotions (how do they express emotion around you?)

He only feels like he can really express himself around you - so it will get intense. In all the best ways.

Gavin doesn’t shy away with showing you his affection, even if he tends to have a slight problem with voicing it sometimes.

His expression softness, his fingers brush delicate circles on your skin.

He doesn’t need to say anything. You know.

F = Family (do they want one? If they do, when?)

Oh he really, really wants a family.

Two kids… or maybe more.

A dog for them, maybe.

House with a big garden and a treehouse.

He wants to play and fool around with his kids. Put them to bed. Support them. Be proud of them… Everything his father never did.

G = Gifts (how do they feel about gift giving? What are their habits when it comes to this?)

When you want something, no matter how silly it might be - it’s yours.

Don’t even make me start on what you need.

Because there are very little things (and all of them are about you) that could make him happier than seeing you happy because of what he gave you.

H = Holding Hands (when/how do they like to hold hands?)

It's not optional.

There will be hands holding whenever it's possible.

It’s as much for your safety as it is for his comfort.

All these guys with eyes better don’t use them to stare at you.

See this hand? This beautiful gem of a person is with ME.

Likes to hold your hand while snuggling on a couch. Or in bed while falling asleep.

Holding hands is like a physical projection of the bond that’s between the two of you - and he loves it.

I = Injury (how would they act if you got hurt?)

He would blame himself. No matter what. It might be ridiculous, but he would always feel guilty for not preventing it from happening.

Wouldn’t leave your side. Would help you with anything and everything.

If there’s a concrete person or a group of people that caused your harm... Insert a very, very angry and strong bird cop with a gun.

J = Jokes (do they like to joke around with or prank you? how?)

You would have a light-hearted relationship in which he would tease you from time to time and he wouldn’t be mad if you did the same to him.

However he’s not one to prank you. He would find no enjoyment in it.

K = Kisses (how do they like to kiss you?)

Gavin loves to be kissed and he loves to kiss. All over your face. All over your body.

Any kisses are game. Slow and passionate ones. Heated ones. Sweet, delicate, loving, appreciating - he loves them all as long as he can share them with you.

L = Love (how do they show you they love you?)

Acts of service - He looooves to spoil his lovely sweetheart (you) this way. Wants to bring you food, tidy up your apartment for you, brush your hair, paint your nails… Just ask him and he will do it. Whatever it is. And then he will do things on his own initiative, because he likes to surprise you. You smile so beautifully when he does…...

Gifts - He likes gift giving as I already mentioned in G, but it’s no indication of love to him. He just enjoys your reactions. Prefers to show his love differently.

Physical touch - His number one and you can not convince me it is not. He’s a snuggly bear who loves kisses. You are just so soft and warm and he loves you sosososososo much. Would never want to hold this way any other. His physical affection is something reserved only for you.

Quality time - see Q.

Words of affirmation - Gavin is not very good with words. Not that he can’t be when he wants to, but he kinda doesn’t want to most of the time. It’s uncomfortable. He’s feeling unconfident doing so. He prefers other ways, but when he does speak up… It’s the most adorable and loving thing you will ever hear in your life.

M = Memory (favorite memory together?)

It was your first 'real' date, but even though you both confessed love to each other, you weren't a ‘official’ couple yet.

At least there was no proper act of becoming a one.

You walk through the park on an evening of a chilly fall. Not many people in sight.

You just finished a lovely dinner date. Gavin even bought you a dessert to share.

And it just felt right. Everything.

The way your fingers were laced. How you both couldn't spot peeping at each other.

"Will you be my girlfriend Y/N? Please?"

He sure was pretty sure you wouldn't deny him, but he didn't expect you to throw your arms around his neck and kiss him the way you did.

"Nothing could ever make me happier than that, Gavin."

N = Nightmare (what is their worst fear?)

He’s scared of losing you.

Either by you walking away from him after discovering that you “deserve so much better”

Or by not being alert enough to protect you…

Surely, he would prefer the first option, but he can’t deny that both would hit him harder than anything else ever could.

O = Oddity (what is one quirk they have?)

Gavin is a little bit of an odd duck in general, but I think he has one major weirdness about him.

I would call it… A Keanu Reeves complex.

He doesn’t like compliments. Always feels like they’re far from true, because he always feels like he’s not enough and maybe even never will be.

Which is so far from true.

Like, Vivi, come on! You’re so freakin perfect!

P = Pet Names (what do they like to call you?)

He usually calls you simply by your name, but the boy has his moments.

Moments when he can help but call you all sorts of the cutest names.

Little angel, starry eyes, little munchkin along with the classics like honey, babe, sweetheart, treasure and my precious.

Q = Quality Time (how do they like to spend time with you?)

How?

Often.

Intensely.

Calmly.

Comfortably.

Restlessly.

He just wants to be by your side. Any. Chance. He. Gets.

R = Rhythm (what song reminds you of them?)

Moonlight by Ariana Grande

Because Gavin’s sweet like candy, but he’s such a man...

Or A Drop In The Ocean by Ron Pope

S = Secrets (how open are they with you?)

Not at all. At least at first.

He gets better with time, but you still need to ask for it. He would never just come to you to lean on your shoulder and tell you what troubles him.

T = Time (how long did it take you to get together?)

Well. A lot.

Because of what I say in X below.

He just assumes that you don’t reciprocate his feelings, because he doesn’t deserve it.

He eventually tells you about his feelings under your insistent questions regarding the subject.

And then? After he finally tells you?

That’s when it escalates quickly.

U = Upset (how do they act when you’re upset?)

At first he tries to keep it inside. Not let you see… But it’s pretty obvious since he doesn’t talk to you. Barely throws any acknowledgment your way.

It would take quite some convincing for him to tell you what’s wrong.

Unless it’s jealousy that is a reason behind his anger. Then he will show you just how upset he is…

Not necessary in a bad way, tho...

V = Vaunt (what are they proud of? Do they like to show you off?)

He’s very proud of you. Always.

Even when you think you’re a failure, he still recognizes how hard you work and how smart you are.

And he also prides himself for earning love of a woman as wonderful as you.

But he’s not a show off. He doesn’t like to be in a center of attention. He doesn’t care for compliments or recognition.

He knows how wonderful you are and that’s all that matters to him.

W = Warrior (how do they feel about you fighting? Would they fight for you, beside you, etc?)

Well, it goes without saying.

Yes. Obviously.

This is Gavin. He does it actively throughout the whole story like it’s the only thing he knows.

X = X-Ray (how well are they able to read you?)

He’s not an expert in emotions.

He gave MC a blood stained letter and was surprised she was troubled by that.

Okay, let’s not sugar coat it - he’s not good at it at all. I said it.

I’m sorry. I wish it was different for you Vivi.

Y = Yes (how would they propose to you?)

I think in Gavin’s case it would be no kneeling with a ring type of thing, because he personally sees no value of that.

Of course, he would if you told him that that’s what you want, but if you don’t…

It would be a beautiful, summer evening. The both of you watching a beautiful sunset from the rooftop of a high building.

Last months you spent together were absolutely wonderful. Life with you by his side was much happier than Gavin could ever dream of… And the way the golden sunlight graces your skin is so, so beautiful.

It wasn’t the first time the thought crossed the bird cop’s mind. He caught himself thinking about it more and more often as your relationship progressed… And before he knew it, the words left his lips.

At first you were sure you must have misheard, so you asked him to repeat. And he did.

His beautiful eyes glimmered with so much love… just as much as you felt for him.

How could you say no to that gorgeous man that adores you so much?

And after that, expect to someday come back home to find the most beautiful and meaningful ring in the world waiting for you to wear it.

Z = Zen (what makes them feel calm?)

Gavin is a man who enjoys simple things in life.

He likes to cozy up with you on a couch on his birthday.

Watch a sunrise and drink cocoa with you on Christmas.

He obviously enjoys various sports, especially if he can enjoy them with you.

But what really, really makes him perfectly calm? Driving Sparky with your hands around his ways and your chest pressed against his back.

The feeling of freedom mixed the warmth of your closeness… how could anyone ask for more?

#mlqc #mr love queen's choice #mlqc fluff #mlqc gavin #mlqc headcanon #mlqc hc #mlqc gavin bai

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calltomuster · 3 years

Note

ooh you’re taking requests! How about “I know it hurts, I’m sorry.” for ani and obi?

Sure! 😁 Thanks for the prompt, @ahsokryze!

From these caretaker dialogue prompts: 15. “I know it hurts, I’m sorry.”

When Anakin had, in his lowest, most spiteful moments, wished Obi-Wan could have felt a fraction of the pain he went through losing a limb, he didn't mean it literally.

But there Obi-Wan was, floating in a bacta tank, missing two legs above the knee.

He looks like half a person, was Anakin's first thought, and then he wanted to hit himself.

"Sir!" A familiar voice came from the corner of the room, and Anakin turned to see it was Commander Cody who had scrambled to attention.

"At ease, Cody," Anakin said immediately, stepping closer to the clone but returning his eyes to Obi-Wan. "What happened?"

"...It's all in the report, sir, I--"

"I don't want to hear what the report says happened, I want to hear what you say happened."

Cody nodded, swallowing. He took a moment to respond. "It was Ventress, sir. She had the General captured and when we found him he was like this."

"Two limbs down," Anakin said bitterly.

"Yes," Cody replied, turning and facing him more directly. "But also... in a bacta tank. Apparently she kept injuring him and then healing it just enough so he wouldn't die before resuming the torture. When we arrived, he was just starting the cycle."

"What?" Anakin asked, finally tearing his eyes away from his former Master and meeting Cody's. "What do you mean she put him in a bacta tank?"

Cody shrugged hesitantly, just as confused as he was. "I guess she wanted the torture without the death that would have come from the blood loss if she had left him alone after."

"Yeah..." Anakin shook his head, moving on for the moment. "How long does he have left in here?"

"Not much longer," Cody said, checking the time on his comm. "You got here just in time."

Anakin forced himself not to feel bitter about that. He'd heard about what had happened to Obi-Wan and had immediately wanted to rush to his side, but the 501st hadn't been done fighting their battle and even after that they were still a day away by hyperspace. By the time the Resolute reached the Negotiator, Obi-Wan had been in bacta for over thirty-six hours, and Anakin was practically tearing his hair out.

But maybe it was good he hadn't been there for those long hours. It wasn't as if he could have done anything.

Fuzzy, the 212th's Chief Medical Officer, entered the room then, followed by a few of his staff.

"General Skywalker," he said grimly. "I'm glad you were able to make it."

"What can you tell me about Obi-Wan?" Anakin asked instead of returning niceties.

Fuzzy did not seem offended at Anakin's lack of tact. "It was a bilateral above-the-knee amputation, as you can see," he gestured to the tank. "Ventress used a lightsaber, judging by the cauterization that was present when we arrived. The bacta he was in and the bacta we transferred him to did him good. I hesitate to use the word 'thankfully' in regards to Ventress, but because she got him in bacta quickly after, he'll have a much less fraught process with prosthetics."

Anakin grit his teeth. This wasn't making any sense. Why would Ventress act like this?

But before he could voice the question aloud, an alarm went off. Obi-Wan's eyes had flown open in the bacta tank, and he was struggling against the various tubes and wires he was attached to.

"Get him out before he aspirates!" Fuzzy ordered to his fellow medics, instantly springing into action. Anakin darted forward too, ignoring the fact that he was probably getting in the way, and concentrated on sending Obi-Wan calming energy through the Force.

It was a chaotic minute or two, but eventually Obi-Wan was half-conscious on the medical bed, wet from the water they'd sprayed on him to get rid of the bacta coverage his skin.

"Obi-Wan?" Anakin asked, as Obi-Wan opened his eyes all the way and blinked a few times.

"An'kin?" Obi-Wan rasped, confused. "Thought you were on Felucia."

"I was," Anakin said, desperately relieved that Obi-Wan was awake and at least somewhat lucid. "But I heard what happened and wanted to come see you."

"What... happened?" Obi-Wan repeated, eyebrows furrowing. Anakin could tell the moment he remembered, because the heart rate monitor spiked and the Force flooded with fear-pain-confusion.

"Hey, hey, it's alright!" Anakin said, pressing his hand over Obi-Wan's chest to try to prevent him from sitting up, but it was moot. Obi-Wan's eyes had already locked on the bedsheets, and how flat they went halfway down his thighs where the rest of his legs should be.

Obi-Wan went white then, and Anakin was able to push him back down easily.

The room was silent, broken only by Obi-Wan's breath as it went in and out of his nose.

"So," Obi-Wan rasped eventually. "Ventress."

"Yeah," Anakin said. "She..." He shrugged helplessly. "She did that and then put you in a tank."

Obi-Wan frowned. "What kind of tank?" he asked, mind no doubt running through images of the armored vehicles they were used to in war.

"No, a bacta tank."

"A bacta tank?" Obi-Wan repeated, sounding like this was the thing that confused him the most. Anakin could relate.

"Yup."

"But why...?" Then Obi-Wan's face cleared. "Dooku."

Now it was Anakin's turn to frown. "What does Dooku have to do with this?"

Obi-Wan grimaced. "He is my grandmaster, technically, and he has demonstrated on occasion an interest in preserving my life, if not my wellbeing. Ventress most likely obeyed some instruction to keep me alive."

Anakin blinked, processing. "That's... str--"

He was cut off by a cry of pain from Obi-Wan, whose face was screwing up as he arched his back as best he could.

"Whoah, what hurts?" Anakin asked, hands hovering uselessly in the air above Obi-Wan's body.

Obi-Wan looked at him miserably. "I... It's my foot. It feels like my foot is on fire."

Anakin's face cleared, though he still felt miserable inside watching Obi-Wan in pain. "I know it hurts, I'm sorry. Phantom limb pain is the worst."

Obi-Wan huffed, high-pitched and breathy. "Now I know."

"Yeah," Anakin said grimly. "I've got a few tricks I could teach you."

"That'd be--" Obi-Wan paused to grimace in pain again, then continued, "much appreciated, thank you."

Anakin nodded, determined. He would be there for Obi-Wan the way Obi-Wan had been there for him after his arm, and give him endless patience and support. His Master deserved nothing less.

Thanks for reading! Requests are currently closed!

#woohoo I made it through all the 'I know it hurts I'm sorry's!#it's such a KILLER prompt and I love it so much but it was definitely an interesting challenge coming up with three different scenarios #thanks so much for the prompt I had a lot of fun writing this one!#anakin skywalker #obi-wan kenobi #commander cody #clone oc fuzzy #my writing #prompt fills

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nasaty · 3 years

Text

Forget me not

What else would this be but an

Aizawa-Sensei x Y/n-Sensei fic

TW: (eventually) violence, discussion of past death, just some bad feelings all around.

Part 1/??

“Aizawa are you fucking kidding me?!” You barged into his office as loud as humanly possible, slamming the door behind you. He was grading papers, seconds from falling asleep, holding his chin in one hand and a red pen in the other. He looked up like he hardly noticed you were there.

“…yes?” He said in his usual low, monotone voice.

This made you even more angry. “You’re trying to get Shinso to transfer into the hero course?! You didn’t even discuss this with me!”

“Not required to.” He didn’t even look up from his grading, and he tapped the pencil on the table in annoyance.

“Are you fucking serious?” You questioned.

He rolled his eyes without caring that you could see, “when am I not serious?” He asked rhetorically.

“Shinso is one of my best students. You really think it’ll be best for him to move him from my classes?”

“He wants to be a hero.”

“YOU want him to be a hero!” You banged your fist on his desk, holding the paperwork for Shinso’s transfer in it. “I don’t care how alike you *think* he is to you, he can make his own decisions!”

“He already did.” He growled.

You were seething. “You didn’t even give him a chance to choose!”

“Get out of my office.”

“UGHH.” You groaned, spun on the ball of your foot to leave and slammed the door behind you.

Making your way down to the teachers lounge, you mashed your teeth together and your face was bright red with anger. You were mumbling to yourself when you were interrupted by someone.

“Are you okay, y/n-san?” You were snapped back into reality when you saw Yagi Toshinori looming over you. He placed a gaunt hand on your shoulder.

You took a deep breath. ‘No need to involve Toshi in this, he’s too stressed anyway,’ you thought. “I’m fine, Toshi, thank you though.”

“You’re bright red, y/n. Are you sure you’re okay…?” His gleaming blue eyes stared into yours as he leaned closer towards you. You couldn’t lie.

Sighing, you stated, “Aizawa-Sensei has decided to try and take Shinso into the hero course. Without consulting me before starting the process.”

“Oh….” Toshinori had such a soft, subdued voice, it calmed you down a bit. “Have you spoken to him…?”

“Shinso? No, I just got the paperwork a few minutes ago.”

“I meant Aizawa-Sensei. Did you talk to him yet?”

“There’s no talking to Aizawa.” You pout.

“You went into his office and screamed at him, didn’t you.” He deduced.

“…maybe a little. He deserved to be screamed at though!”

“I didn’t say he didn’t!” Toshi put his hands up in innocence. “I’m sure you have a good reason to be upset about this, so maybe you should bring it up with him.”

You signed in defeat. “Fine…. I need to cool off first though.”

“Would you like to accompany me for coffee then? I was just about to head out.” A wide grin was plastered on his face.

“That would be nice, Toshi, thank you.”

“Anytime, y/n-san.”

You went to a nice cafe with Toshinori and drank coffee in his car so people wouldn’t bombard him. Even though he wasn’t the All Might everyone used to know, people recognized his form now, so it was hard for him to go anywhere. He appreciated your company and for working crowd control a bit when you tagged along.

Making your way back to the school, you decided you would send Aizawa an email to explain and attempt to meet up and discuss the situation. You wanted to be prepared so you wrote down a few points you thought you’d forget, and once you were at your office you sent the email to him.

“Aizawa-Sensei,

I apologize for my behavior earlier. I had just received the paperwork regarding Shinso and was upset. I hope you can forgive me. I was wondering if I could have a bit of your time to hear your reasoning for this transfer though, if I may. Again I am sorry for my emotions getting the best of me.

-Y/n”

You did a little sucking up because you really didn’t want him to take Shinso. You thought he belonged in the General Studies course so he could cover more broad topics and really decide all the things he wanted to do with his quirk and his intellect. There was no reason to limit him to just hero work.

Your computer dinged and you opened the most recent email

“Have you calmed down then?

A.S.”

“UGH!” You groaned. He was so rude! He always knew how to piss you off in just the right way and you felt like an idiot. Still, Shinso having a say in his future was important to you, so you decided to ignore his games.

“I have. I’m sorry for how I acted.”

You sent back.

“Are you sure?

A.S.”

He could not be more insolent.

“No. I’m sorry for how I acted but I’m not sorry for why I acted that way.”

“Fair. Come see me during 4th period office hour.

A.S.”

Finally, he agreed to at least discuss the matter rather than just going behind your back. You agreed to the meeting time and wrote down a few more points to hit in your conversation.

#aizawa fanfiction #aizawa x female reader #bnha aizawa #bnha #mha #aizawa slow burn #shouta aizawa #aizawa angst #aizawa fluff #aizawa smut #yagi toshinori #hizashi yamada #nemuri kayama #aizawa x you #aizawa x reader

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talesofesther · 3 years

Text

Anchor - Part 10

Five Hargreeves x Reader

Masterlist with the other parts

See part one for important notes

A/N: I'm not sure if this part is exactly what I hoped it would be, I have this problem where I plan one thing but then when I'm writing I write something completely different, and I'm just like 'the hell was that Esther??!?' But oh well, it's finally out, I hope you guys like it anyway. If you wanna be added to the tag list, let me know. ♥

The car engine was the only thing they could hear on their way to meet Luther. Five was driving, his eyes fixated on the road ahead of him. Y/N had her arm braced on the car door, her gaze lazily following the passing landscape outside the window, but her mind was cluttered.

"Five, that woman I met, The Handler?" The girl sat straighter and turned her eyes to Five.

He hummed, acknowledging her question.

"Do you think she knew my parents?" Y/N's voice was small, vulnerable. Her tone even made Five's expression soften, he spared her a quick glance. Y/N's mind was confused and overwhelmed with questions, Five could see it in her eyes. He would be lying if he said he wasn't at least a bit worried, if Y/N was somehow involved with the commission, that would be... Bad.

"I don't know Y/N, it's possible. The commission is always after new people, maybe they were one of them"

Y/N let out a shaky breath and looked ahead. The possibility of her parent's involvement with the commission made her heartbeat quicker, it's something she would never consider possible before, but now...

"Don't you remember anything that could possibly connect them with the commission?" Five asked as he parked the car just beside the place Luther was staying, they could already see Vanya's car ahead as well.

Y/N opened her door and stepped outside. "No, all I know is what I told you last night... That's all my aunt ever told me"

Five gulped and stepped outside as well, gripping his door tighter at the mention of last night. It made him nervous to think about it, how close they got...

He shook his head and snapped out of it. Probably meant nothing to her, so it shouldn't mean anything to him either, as much as he wanted it to.

"A-and you were too young to remember anything else?"

Y/N put her hands on her pockets and walked beside Five, a frown on her face as she thought about anything else she could possibly remember. "Yeah, all I remember are flashes from the night of the fire"

Suddenly, Five felt Y/N grip his arm, not strong, but enough to make him stop walking and turn to look at her. His skin prickling slightly where her hand stood.

"But what if The Handler knows more, Five? About what happened. Why it happened" Y/N's voice and expression were almost desperate. Throughout all her life her past and her parent's death felt like a mystery she wasn't allowed to solve, and it killed her every day to not know what happened. "The look on her eyes when she saw me. It was like she knew me, really knew me."

Five sighed and stepped closer to the girl, a serious look on his face. "Listen, that woman is dangerous. And she's good. She's good at making people believe whatever it is she wants them to believe, so stay away from her, okay?" His voice was steady and serious, but his eyes showed genuine concern. "We'll deal with all of this once the end of the world is over" and with that, he started walking towards Vanya again.

Y/N clenched her jaw and stood there thinking for a moment. She trusted she could balance helping stop the end of the world and finding out more about her past. After all, that woman can't be that bad right? Y/N thought while walking towards the siblings.

"I think you should go up alone. He wasn't exactly happy to see me the last time we met" Five said to Vanya with a certain thickness in his voice.

"Are- are you sure?" The woman said, then turned to Y/N and gave her a welcoming smile of good morning. Which the girl reciprocated.

"Yeah. We'll wait down here" Five sighed and leaned back against Vanya's car, crossing his arms.

Vanya just nodded to him and made her way up to see Luther.

Y/N watched her retreating figure. The girl kicked some little rocks with her sneakers, feeling weirdly nervous for being alone with Five, with nothing to do. With slow steps she made her way to stand beside him, leaning her body on the car as well.

Five was looking down, his brows furrowed as usual. He looked deep in thought, his chest rising and falling slowly as he breathed evenly. Y/N found herself gazing at him once again, more and more she was starting to find it harder to take her eyes off of him.

"Are you feeling better?" She quietly broke the silence. She saw how Five's shoulders became rigid as soon as she finished her question. "I know you don't wanna talk about it, but I just want to know if you're okay" Y/N's voice was so low that it almost got lost to the sounds of the cars passing by on the street, as if she was scared any loud noises would scare him away. And she was.

Her tone made it sound like she was giving Five the choice of acting like he didn't hear her. It was tempting, but he could never ignore her. His breathing wasn't as even anymore, though. He's never talked about his feelings before, not that anyone ever cared to ask him about them. But still, it was an unexplored ground for him, and he felt lost. And very, very nervous.

"I'm fine" the easy and usual answer came out of his mouth as a defense mechanism, like all the other times she would urge him to talk about this matter. But now he felt like they were past that, like it was unfair to give her such an empty answer. And that fact scared him. However, It didn't stop his heart from yearning for her, from pushing against his ribs and trying to escape his chest every time she showed her concern for him.

Five stood straighter, his mouth opened and closed a couple of times. Looking up to meet her eyes, he saw patience, and yet again affection. It looked so genuine that he didn't even realize the soft words slipping him.

"I'm better now. You... Helped" he gulped the lump in his throat and looked around everywhere but at her eyes. Nervously putting his hands on his pockets and moving his feet to walk just an inch away from Y/N, even if there was a pull in his stomach asking him to do the exact opposite.

A small smile made it's way to the girl's lips, she already knew that everything regarding feelings or anything even slightly intimate was totally out of Five's comfort zone. Although she also knew, from his looks and the way his body sometimes gravitated towards her ever so slightly, that it was something he was in deep need of. So these little steps he was taking on acknowledging that, made her truly happy.

Y/N carefully raised one of her hands to his shoulder and drew circles with her thumb there. The fabric of his blazer was soft under her touch. "I'm really happy to hear that, Five"

Before she could say anything else, a loud smashing sound could be heard and when she looked up, she saw Luther looking down at them from a newly punched hole in his wall. "Oh my" the girl whispered with wide eyes.

Five just laughed at his brother's actions and looked aside. Not long after that, Vanya came down with the new information that she was the one that caused the first apocalypse. After a small argument with Five, she drove away in her car, saying that she just wanted to live her new life in peace. Y/N couldn't blame her, but that wasn't exactly an available choice.

"She'll probably come around eventually, just give her some time. She's been through a lot, losing your memory can't be easy" Y/N said as she watched Vanya's car drive out of sight.

Five let out a frustrated sigh. "I wonder if it's too late to be un-adopted" he said more to himself than to her, stomping his way back to the car.

"Hey, come on, don't say that" Y/N made a little run to keep up with Five's fast steps. From the look on his face, he was quite annoyed with his siblings.

______

The ride back was spent mostly in silence, Y/N would occasionally steal some glances at Five, but she thought it was better to leave him quiet for a moment. When they walked back into Elliott's, Diego was sitting on the couch with Lila taking care of his wound.

"Diego!" Y/N exclaimed as she threw her jacket at one of the armchairs. "How are you feeling? Better?" She gracefully sat down on the couch in front of him.

"Yeah, peachy" the man smiled at her, but his eyes soon traveled to Five entering the room as well.

"Found Vanya?"

"Yes" Five said to him as his hands skillfully rummaged through Elliot's counters and found himself a cup of coffee.

"And?" Diego urged him to continue as Lila removed the bandage from his stomach.

"She went back to the farm she's staying in" the boy said, sitting beside Y/N and bringing his cup to his lips.

Y/N sighed as her gaze fixated on Five. "Dude... You live purely out of coffee" she mumbled in a disapproving way.

Five only shot her a glance that said 'that's none of your business'.

"And you just let her go?" Diego wondered as his eyes looked between his brother and Y/N.

"She'll come around, eventually. But right now our priority is finding dad and getting answers, 'cause everything else depends on it" Five said as he leaned back on the couch. Once he was within range, Y/N mindlessly laid her head on his shoulder purely out of laziness, not at all thinking about what she was doing. Her actions made Five's body tense and his cheeks burn red.

"Good thing I know where he'll be" Y/N bit her lip and smiled at the boy, between her fingers she held a folded piece of paper.

With careful hands, Five took the paper from her hand. Using every ounce of self-control to keep his hand from shaking. "Hoyt Hillenkoetter and the Consulate General of Mexico in Dallas cordially invite you to a gala" he read the neat typography, a surprised look on his face.

"Where did you find this?" Five looked down to meet Y/N's eyes, almost melting at how adorable she looked with her cheek pressed to his shoulder.

"At an office, while you were busy getting your ass kicked by a chimpanzee" the girl giggled softly.

Five let out a nervous chuckle and gulped down the tingling in his stomach. "Well, that's... That's great, we'll sneak in"

Lila and Diego were watching the two with amused eyes, they both shared a knowing glance just before Elliott hysterically stepped in. "This man he's- he's one of the majestic twelve"

"The hell is that?" Diego asked.

"It's a... A secret committee. Scientists, military, deep state. No one knows what they really do" Elliott went on as he walked to his desk and searched through his sea of papers for something.

"Alright boys, while you talk about the boring stuff. Me and..." Lila jumped up from her place on the couch and extended her hand to Y/N. "Y/N here, are gonna go shopping for proper clothes"

Y/N smiled brightly and took her hand. Lila pulled the girl up with ease and leaned down closer to her face. "We should get to know each other better, I have a feeling we'll be besties" the woman whispered with a smile on her lips.

Y/N could feel Five's intense gaze on her back. But her deep need for a friend got the best of her, it's been ages since she got to spend time with another girl, she missed the feeling and Lila seemed just perfect for the occasion. "Agreed"

Still holding her hand, Lila smirked and guided Y/N out of the room. "See you guys in a bit. It's girls bonding time" she waved at them.

Five watched as Y/N disappeared from his line of sight. A giant pit already making its way to his stomach at the thought of something happening. He tried not to dwell on the matter too much, but he didn't trust Lila for a second.

Apparently, his nervousness was visible because he soon heard Diego say. "Relax, Five. You can let go of her for a couple of minutes, nothing will happen. Plus I think she could use a break from you" his brother teased him in an amused voice, and an all too pleased look on his face.

Five huffed and got up. "I don't know what you're talking about" as soon as he finished talking, he teleported away.

______

Cars and people passed by on the busy streets of Dallas as Y/N and Lila walked to the nearest clothing store. They talked about everything, Lila seeming genuinely interested in knowing Y/N better. The girl felt good for having someone different to talk to.

"Tell me something new about you" the woman asked as they walked side by side.

"Oh I- I don't know..." Y/N looked up at her with a sorry smile. What could she say? I come from the future?

"Oh come on sweetheart, you must have at least one embarrassing childhood story to share" Lila swang her arm around Y/N's shoulders and pulled the girl closer.

She chuckled and looked down. "Not really, my childhood wasn't exactly the best" Y/N said with a frown as she bit her lip and put her hands on her pockets.

"Why not?" Lila wondered. Y/N liked her thick accent, it was pleasant to listen to. She was about to answer when they walked in front of a cute ice cream parlor, it was small but very colorful and nicely decorated.

Lila came to a stop and turned to Y/N with a huge smile on her face. "You know what? Let's eat some ice cream, and then you can tell me everything about that".

______

It had passed probably two hours when Y/N and Lila walked back into Elliott's place, talking about random things and with smiles on their faces, Y/N felt happy for spending some time with her. They went to a clothing store and tried on several dresses before finally finding the perfect ones.

Diego was getting ready for the gala as well, so that left Five alone in the living room to wait for everyone's vanities. He was sitting on the couch, looking at a newspaper that was loosely settled between his hands but not actually reading it. Upon hearing faint voices coming in his direction, his eyes rose up.

"... I think it looked perfect on you, besides you guys will be matching" Lila's voice became clearer as both girls walked into the room. Y/N was carrying two bags and Lila one. The woman shot a glance in Five's direction. "You're even making me depressed with those puppy eyes, my god"

Y/N chuckled and gave Lila's shoulder a gentle push.

"I'll go and get ready. Good luck" Lila whispered to Y/N as she looked between the two.

"Thanks" the girl smiled as she watched Lila disappear into another room.

After a couple of seconds of silence, Y/N took small strides towards Five. An expectant look on her face as her bags hung loosely on her left hand. "She's quite nice"

Five's eyes fixated on her face as he leaned back onto the couch, a soft sigh leaving his lungs. He felt involuntarily lighter now that Y/N was in his line of sight again. "I don't trust her"

The girl smiled slightly and looked down. "Yeah, I know" Y/N said lowly, she turned her back to him and started to walk towards Elliot's guest room. She could feel Five's eyes following her every move, but his body stayed frozen in place. Giving him a look over her shoulder, she said. "Aren't you coming?"

Her words made a shiver run through Five's entire body as nervousness filled his gut. "Where?" His voice sounded strangely timid.

With a frown, Y/N turned her body back towards him and raised her hands in a 'what are you talking about' gesture. "To get ready? For the gala" she said as a matter of fact.

"I am... Ready" Five squinted his eyes at her words.

Y/N let out a huff and dropped her bags. "Oh no, no sir. You are not" she pointed her finger at him and walked up to his personal space. Leaning down and bracing her hands on her knees so she could be closer to his face, she said. "I know you have a passion for that uniform, but we're going to a gala, Five. A gala. And I'm not going in with you looking like a schoolboy, come on, I bought you some clothes" with a smile, she stood straight again and extended her hand for him to take.

The boy looked up at her with parted lips and rosy cheeks, his words stuck on his throat. A warm and fuzzy feeling sneaked its way inside his heart. The fact that Y/N remembered him, thought about him, while she was out doing something for herself made him utterly speechless. With a careful touch, Five lightly grabbed her hand and stood up. She was soft and tender to his touch, he didn't feel like letting go anytime soon.

"Good, now, the clothes are rather simple, it's not like I have a lot of money on me now. But they're nice, I really hope they fit you, though" Y/N chuckled as she grabbed the bags again and dragged Five inside of Elliott's spare room. "I wasn't exactly sure what are your sizes for clothing"

"I'm sure they'll be fine" Five said with a small voice, missing Y/N's touch when she let go of him. He was still processing the fact that she bought something for him. When was the last time someone bought him anything?

"This... Is yours" she handed Five one of the bags once they entered the room. "I'll go change in the bathroom" the girl gave him a tight smile and turned around to enter a small bathroom just beside the room.

With his curiosity peeking, Five put his bag on the bed and slowly opened it. Inside laid a neatly folded black social shirt and black pants. A tiny smile graced his lips, Y/N had good taste.

A couple of minutes passed until Five heard a soft knock on his door, he was just finishing the last buttons on his shirt.

"Can I come in?" Y/N's voice came from outside.

"Sure" the boy answered, and once he heard the cracking of the door opening, he looked up. To say he was suddenly out of breath was an understatement, he felt like he was about to faint or maybe have a heart attack because of how fast his heart started to beat.

Y/N stepped inside with a soft "hey" but her words landed on deaf ears as Five was still processing how incredibly beautiful she was. She was wearing a totally black dress that hugged her body just right, her hair was partially done up allowing the light makeup on her face to accentuate her eyes. Five's gaze traveled up and down her body, carefully marking this image of her on his memory forever.

Only when she slightly raised her eyebrows at him, silently asking him why he was so quiet, that he audible gulped and somehow found his voice again. "You... You look beautiful" it was nothing but a whisper, but he had to say it.

A soft blush appeared on Y/N's cheeks, she chuckled and looked down, a mix of excitement and nervousness tugging at her chest. "You do too" with a smile, she took a moment to analyze Five as well. The black shirt looked really good on him, it went just perfect with his dark hair and eyebrows. The pants were just a little bit bigger than necessary, but it wasn't exactly noticeable.

Y/N parted her lips and walked up to Five, her high heels tapping the ground being the only sound in the room. His uniform was folded on the bed, with one hand she grabbed his tie from the pile. "I think... You can keep the tie"

A shaky breath escaped Five as Y/N softly put his tie back on him. Her closeness made him feel like everything else had disappeared and it was just them, their faces were mere inches apart. Without even noticing, Five's eyes moved down to look at her lips, the red lipstick she was using framed them perfectly.

With one final tug, Y/N adjusted Five's tie around his neck. Using her hands to smooth out the fabric of his shirt, she looked up and blinked a couple of times when she realized just how close he was.

Five's eyes were hazy, seeming almost in a trance as he looked at the girl in front of him. His heartbeat thundering in his ears. Panic was threatening to eat him up. And his breath was still partially stuck, but he couldn't care less. Without knowing where to put his hands, the desire to have Y/N just a tad closer won him over and he gently tugged at her waist.

His touch was so tender, that if Y/N was wearing any other type of clothing she would have missed it. But she didn't, and just this little movement of him pulling her closer and not further away, made her smile. "You should dress like this more often, you look really good" she said more to fill the silence than anything else. Timidly raising one of her hands to brush away some strands of hair that had fallen into his eyes.

"You guys ready yet?" Diego's sudden voice made them both visibly jump. A red blush coming to both of their faces as they realized they were too caught up in the moment to even hear the door opening. Five quickly put a distance between him and Y/N, his body stiff and jaw clenched as a sensation of guilt filled his ribcage, painfully aware of what just happened.

Diego narrowed his eyes at Five and gave him a teasing smile. "It's time to go" and with that, he left.

Y/N took in a sharp breath and smoothed out her dress with both of her hands. "I- I'll wait for you outside"

Once she had passed through the door, Five sat on the edge of the bed, head buried in his hands and elbows resting on his knees. He felt the onslaught of nervousness, fear, and insecurities make his stomach turn. His hands trembled and he had to clasp one over the other to make it stop. "Shit, shit, shit. What the hell was that?" The boy mumbled to himself as he ran a hand through his hair. "Uh you're an idiot, Five" he scolds himself, for completely losing control this time, for letting his emotions get the best of him and make him invade her personal space like that. He feels like he overstepped, even if she didn't pull away, he feels like he shouldn't be allowing himself to be like that.

Did she look uncomfortable? Is she mad that I pulled her closer? Why would I even do that?? Were some of the thousand thoughts running through his mind.

He tugged at the collar of his shirt and took one deep breath to calm his nerves. His eyes became slightly glossy with salty tears, the more he got closer to Y/N, the more he missed her when she was gone. And the more he dwelled on how genuine it all was, or if everything was just inside his troubled mind. This... Neediness for touch and contact was starting to get on his nerves.

***

Thank you for reading ♥ the next part should be out soon. And if you have any idea about how this story should progress or anything you would like to see in it, please send me an ask or message and I’d be happy to include it. All opinions and feedback are appreciated ♥

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himbeaux-on-ice · 3 years

Note

Hello! I was wondering if you could please explain to me what Robin Lehner said yesterday about vaccination and competitive edge? English isn't my 1st language and from what I gathered NHL and PA promised VGK that if they get vaccinated the restrictions on them will lessen and they can freely leave their houses. And when they players got vaccines, NHL changed their promise and said players can't do that until all of the teams across the league are evenly vaccinated (shitty move from NHL, 1/2

2/2 as always). But what did Robin mean talking about competitive edge? I rewatched the video 3 times and I still don't understand :( Did the league make it a competition between the teams? "The sooner you all get vaccinated, the sooner there'll be no resctions on you?" I hope, I'm not completely missing the point, sorry about that. Big respect for Robin for speaking up and calling out the league. I'm really happy seeing players speaking up for themselves and their teams

Hi anon! I’ve spoken about this already a bit here and here, in case you haven’t seen those yet and think they might answer some of your questions. But I’m happy to elaborate further! I hope I can clear this up for you.

First, just as a note: Right now it doesn’t seem to exactly be clear what the NHL and NHLPA did or didn’t promise players in terms of easing restrictions, but it seems like Lehner was definitely given the impression by somebody that a team getting fully or mostly vaccinated was the ticket to not being under such strict isolation. The NHL for their part seems to be claiming they promised no such thing, but it’s hard to know right now whether that’s just them covering ass, or if there was just a misunderstanding somewhere in which what they actually said was not fully clear to the players. [Elliotte Friedman voice] More news may be yet to come on this.

Right. So as far as “competitive edge” goes, I can definitely explain that. You’re only a little off the mark. What he means in this case is that the NHL is concerned that letting more fully vaccinated teams live under a less intensely restrictive set of internal rules (regarding things like dining together, exercising together, sitting next to each other on planes and busses, having more group off-ice social time, sharing hotel rooms, having in-person coaching meetings again, etc) will lead to that group having an on-ice advantage in their play over other teams who are less vaccinated and still have to live under full restrictions.

Because the NHL is intensely obsessed with “parity of sport” (trying to make the conditions of competition the same for all teams regardless of outside factors wherever possible), they always in as many situations as possible want to eliminate any potential leg up one team could have over others. This is why we have things like the salary cap, rules about scouting players, rules about how draft picks are distributed that try to make sure struggling teams have a chance to draft well, rules against signing your best players for 20-year contracts so nobody else can have them, etc.

In general theory, being parity-oriented is good! It aims to make sure that the success of teams on the ice and in the standings is determined by the hockey play/skill alone as much as possible, not by franchise wealth or other things they did to get an unfair jump on the competition. And that should make the games more fun and less boring/predictable in most cases! As far as sports leagues go, the NHL has pretty good parity of play overall — there are only a few REALLY good teams and only a few REALLY bad ones, and everybody else performs within a pretty similar range most years. This is why back-to-back Cup wins are so rare in the current era, because due to all the rules to enforce parity there are relatively few teams that are THAT dominant over the competition for a long stretch of multiple seasons in a row, and the odds of any given team winning each year are much more similar. (As compared to like that period in the late 70’s when it was like “who won the Cup? oh surprise surprise it’s the Habs AGAIN 🙄” lol).

However, sometimes the NHL gets unrealistic in its pursuit of making sure everything is exactly the same for all teams. We’ve seen it already this season with the stubborn insistence on making sure the Canucks play a full 56 game season like everybody else, regardless of whether it is safe or reasonable to do so in the time they have left.

This time, the fixation on parity seems to be rearing its head in the form of the League insisting that even if a team has most or all of their players and staff vaccinated, they still have to maintain the same intense restrictions within team spaces as other teams which may be WAY further behind in getting everyone vaccinated, rather than getting to benefit from the lowered risk that being thoroughly vaccinated brings within a closed group like that. And they seem to be insisting on this not because it would be unsafe to change things for vaccinated teams, but rather because of concern that doing so might make that team perform better as a hockey team.

That’s the key part here: The NHL seems to consider getting to (safely) return to a mode of team life that is somewhat more similar to what these guys have been habitually used to pre-pandemic, to be something that could translate into an unfair on-ice advantage in the quality of their play, over other teams who are still doing it all “the hard way” under strict restrictions because they haven’t been vaccinated yet. And because of trying for parity, they want avoid giving teams that “advantage” by basing restriction changes around each team’s individual situation, and instead plan to ease restrictions for all teams at the same time at some point once all teams are similar levels of vaccinated.

Now, US teams seem to be getting vaccinated faster and faster every day, but Canadian teams probably have not started vaccinating their players or any team employees under age 50 at all yet, because Canada’s vaccination process has been painfully slow. So waiting on them to catch up could leave US teams who are already mostly/fully vaccinated still stuck in those restrictive mentally draining conditions for quite some time before the other teams catch up — again, not because it isn’t COVID safe to ease their restrictions if done properly (that doesn’t seem to be a problem), but because the League sees the improvements to their mental state and team morale/cohesion that would come from living a less restricted life together and getting to return to familiar off-ice hockey routines as gaining a “competitive edge” over unvaccinated teams, which would lead to them playing better hockey to a level that can’t be matched as a result.

Which, Lehner is right, is a pretty fucked up way to look at it! “It’s an unfair advantage for you to not be miserably alone and depressed by that and frustrated and doing everything with 16 extra steps you’re still not used to, it’s an unfair advantage to get to actually act like a team off the ice when playing a team sport, so no, we’re not gonna let you eat lunch together or share hotel rooms or whatever” is not exactly a compassionate argument!

Anon I’m also really glad Robin said something about it, and I was glad to see VGK captain Mark Stone put full and vocal team support behind him when asked about it last night on the broadcast too. The mental price of these intense restrictions is something that has been weighing on my mind ever since I first heard they would have to spend all their time on the road locked in hotel rooms alone when not playing and thought “oh god, five months of that is going to be psychologically devastating”. It’s a relief to hear it acknowledged.

I’m not fully sure what the best solution is here, but that mental wellbeing factor absolutely must be discussed in all decisions. It would be fucked up if the League is treating that as something purely technical to be controlled like the salary cap, rather than as a key determinant of health and life (in the short and long term) that is just as important as COVID safety. The old hockey culture of “just suck it up” cannot cut it anymore.

Aside: I think it’s also worth mentioning while we’re here, that I think I do understand why players may be angry about have been talked into getting the vaccine because they thought it would lead to eased personal restrictions, and why I don’t believe that anger necessarily represents an “anti-vaxx” mindset. There are reasons they may not have planned on getting vaccinated just yet which aren’t necessarily “anti-vaxx” cult thinking (though that doesn’t mean they’re smart reasons lol) and would likely seem reasonable to players in-context. I’m gonna put that under a cut though bc this is already really long!

First, there’s the fact that we don’t know what medical conditions some players may or may not have which could make them hesitant to get some of the vaccines out of an abundance of caution. More prominently you also gotta remember, these guys are athletes currently competing their way through an extremely intense and extremely important part of the season as they try to secure playoff spots, playing sometimes as many as 4 games a week. Looking at it that way, it’s understandable why some of them would be hesitant about getting a shot at this particular time which we all know is going to whammy you with a nasty little bout of mild-moderate side effects that hit you like a bad cold for as much as a week. They probably don’t feel they can afford to be laid up with muscle aches, sinus suffering, fatigue, and all the other little fun (and eventually harmless in the end!) things that your body runs through while activating that initial immune response — because in the couple of days that it throws them off for, their team could play 3 or more REALLY important playoff-clinching games, which they could end up underperforming in or having to sit out.

If that is the situation you’re in, and you already feel like the current League restrictions are doing enough to protect you, you can see why you would say “I think I’ll wait and get it during the offseason/during the week break between regular season and playoffs, and just suck it up for these last few weeks dealing with the same ol lonely isolation restrictions I’ve already gotten used to dealing with all season long, rather than be hit with that curveball of possible temporary vaccine side-effects during this time when I need to give it my all every game.” That may sound like a selfish mindset, but I wouldn’t be surprised if that is how at least some of these athletes are approaching it, especially ones who may be single guys without families at home to worry about protecting. (Lehner, for the record, has a wife and two young kids).

BUT, if the League told you (or it sounded like the League told you) “Hey, if enough of your team gets vaccinated quickly, we’ll be able to lift some of the internal restrictions for you guys and let you like hang out and do stuff together within the team again”, and if you were REALLY struggling with the mental stress of that isolated living style, you might weigh the two options against each other and say “Okay, I’m willing to power through a week of potential side-effects and get vaccinated with the fellas if it means I won’t have to be so goddamn miserable and depressed every day.” and then you get the shot(s).

And if you did that, and THEN the League said “lol no, even though your team is fully immunized you still have to sit in your room alone every night and eat by yourself and not leave your house, because it’s not fair to other teams if you guys are no longer mentally miserable like them”, well now you find yourself in the worst of both worlds — still stuck in isolation, AND you’ve still got to play through all the potential vaccine side-effects that will leave you a little off your game during some of the most crucial games of the year.

Plus, that leaves you not feeling like you got to give informed consent — you agreed to get vaccinated (ie undergo a medical treatment) under the expectation that there would be certain rewards to be gained in terms of relief for your mental health, which made you decide it was worth the potential dent in your performance for a few games and any other worries you had about the vaccine, because the prospect of that relief was so worth it. And now, you are told by the League “that payoff you expected never existed, we never promised that, what are you talking about? we can’t change things for your mental health because that might make you better at hockey than the depressed unvaccinated teams”. I can understand how that turn of events could leave someone, as Robin expressed, feeling like they were “tricked” or “forced” into making a choice that they may have done differently otherwise. They felt that they were promised something in return that they didn’t get.

Note at the end of all this: Again, we still don’t know whether the NHL and NHLPA actually made any promises, or if they simply weren’t clear enough in communicating expectations to teams and the players misunderstood what was said to mean something else. Regardless, using the idea that being freed from having to be miserably isolated to an even greater degree than most of the US general public is an “unfair competitive advantage” to now justify not allowing reasonable adjustments to the restrictions for fully vaccinated teams is fucked up, and treats mental wellbeing as just another gameplay-impacting factor to be controlled rather than a deeply impactful part of a person’s overall wellbeing which can even threaten their life. The players must be treated as people.

#long post #asks #anon #robin lehner #vegas golden knights #covid 19 #nhl #hockey

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ellewords · 3 years

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hey elle! i saw your answers for the questions i sent—i love coffee and cookie dough ice cream too! i’ve found that i like a lot of coffee-flavored stuff like ice cream, cake, and candy lol. i also really love cookies and cream! i’d say that’d be my favorite with coffee and cookie dough being VERY CLOSE seconds

BABY DON’T STOP IS ICONIC WHEW but may i propose....haikyuu boys dancing to it.......

anyways today i’ve got some headcanons for a past written on the margins question! first it was a karaoke party with the seijoh 4, and now it’s a road trip! aka you and iwaizumi are the only ones with any braincells in this godforsaken car (they make you handle the gps stuff since you’re the best with it). i can imagine each of them rotating and driving for a set number of hours or at least until they reach a rest stop, especially on long trips. whoever’s sitting shotgun (they rotate between this seat too) has control over the radio and aux cord and oikawa jokes that it’s the best part of going on road trips (but is he really joking though...)

makki and mattsun pretend to groan when you sit shotgun, but in actuality they don’t mind and will probably sing along to some of the songs you play (if there’s a rap part in the song currently playing everyone makes mattsun rap along i feel like his voice just fits it) while oikawa would be like UGH FINALLY SOMEONE WITH SOME MUSIC TASTE just to get a rise out of the other boys (but he really does think those kpop songs you blast lowkey slap he’s been listening to some of them while he works out or goes on his morning runs). iwa generally doesn’t have much of a preference but i can see him being partial to more upbeat songs to keep him or whoever’s driving awake, but even during slow songs the rest of you guys sing loud enough and chaotic enough to prevent anyone from getting any shut-eye (oikawa, makki, and mattsun dramatically act out a whole SAGA)

when you guys reach any rest stop makki is the first one out of the car and he makes a beeline towards the bathroom because he drank a lot of water during you guys’ impromptu karaoke session (gotta keep those vocal chords taken care of!). oikawa and mattsun are usually the ones in charge of getting snacks, they always end up getting a lot but they make sure to get everyone’s favorites! the amount of snacks they buy seems overkill but they’re athletic boys with voracious appetites and getting this many snacks ensures that the car is never short on food. if this is during or post-timeskip iwa is probably a little more strict on the snacks everyone eats (especially with regards to oikawa, being a professional athlete and all) but eventually decides to let up a bit—it’s not everyday he gets to go on a trip with his close friends, plus all those calories are gonna get burned right away once you guys reach your destination and go from place to place.

god help anyone who actually falls asleep in the car because oikawa and makki are taking photos of whoever’s sleeping with their phones AND with the polarioid camera you brought. despite this, though, everyone makes a conscious effort to be quieter when someone’s napping, and the volume of the radio is turned a bit lower. one of your favorite pictures on your phone is a selfie you took of everyone while you were sitting in the passenger seat: mattsun was driving at the time and though he wasn’t looking at the camera, a smile is on his face as he makes a peace sign with one hand; oikawa, iwa, and makki are sleeping in the back seats with oikawa and makki leaning on iwa’s shoulders (he lost a few rounds of rock paper scissors and had to sit in the middle). this also extends to when you’re asleep in the car as well—oikawa jokingly made his phone background a selfie of you leaning on his shoulder while napping (featuring a blurry iwaizumi at the side) but he actually finds it quite cute and doesn’t want to change it to his usually background quite yet.

it’s evening when you guys finally reach your hotel and everyone’s a bit tired from being cooped up in the car all day but surprisingly enough no one’s really sleepy because everyone at one point had the opportunity to nap on the way there. if you’re dating one of the boys the others DEFINITELY make you two take one room while the other three take the room adjacent to it. after everyone’s gotten ready for bed you’re all gathered in one of the hotel rolls just vibing on your phones and you and oikawa decide it’s the perfect time to bring out The Sheet Masks™️ that you kept in the cooler in the car during the trip so they’d remain cold. many more goofy photos of everyone with the masks on their faces are taken.

by this point it’s late at night and eventually you guys fall into having some nice, genuine heart-to-heart conversations. if this is during or post-timeskip everyone’s sharing what they’ve been up to ever since graduation or ever since you guys last saw/talked to each other. it’s just such a nice and comforting environment to be in because everyone’s a little tired from the day’s events and so it’s not as loud and boisterous, but at the same time this tiredness and it being nighttime means everyone’s filters are a little looser than usual and you could ask for advice on just about anything and everyone else would chime in with both lighthearted and actual suggestions. the boys are just SOFTER during this time like you could bring up how you’ve been getting back into something you did during high school (like playing piano or guitar or something) and they’d want you to show them videos or pictures of what you’ve been up to! maybe one boy brings up something that’s been worrying them for a while and you and the others are giving him words of encouragement while also cracking jokes. it’s just really chill and nice and everyone likes these late night talks because they bring you all a little closer.

everyone ends up sleeping in the same hotel room. you wake up sandwiched between oikawa and mattsun (oikawa’s got an arm thrown around you and mattsun’s long leggies are literally on top of yours and you wonder how you managed to sleep soundly last night) and iwa and makki are on the pull out sofa bed and you’re like Hey Guys. What The Heck (makki takes this opportunity to snap a photo of the three of you wrapped up in the bedcovers) and when you guys go to get breakfast at the hotel buffet it’s strangely quiet because almost everyone is still sleepy lol.

after getting some food in your system and getting ready for the day you’re all back to your usual energetic selves! you snap a mirror selfie of everyone gathered around the sink in one of the hotel rooms because oikawa was finishing getting ready (he takes the longest i just know it) and the other boys were just hanging around him talking about what’s planned for the day. the schedule you guys have isn’t super specific but there’s a few choice locations that you guys looked into in advance and try to visit no matter what! a day out with them is definitely filled with photos. you’ve got a lot of them in which they’re trying to recreate some funny pose in a picture oikawa saw online (like the one of nct in the ask i sent you earlier!!) and they either turn out really great or really horrible (funny) because you have a knack for taking photos where everything looks normal but someone’s face would be really blurry. but they would also try and take some really nice photos too—they’ll all even help you if you want to take some solo shots! oikawa and makki know the best angles for aesthetically pleasing photos, mattsun has a knack for taking panorama photos that look perfect, and iwaizumi’s really good at taking those types of photos of you guys jumping in the air without them looking weird. you’ve basically got four tall hypemen it’s great!!

overall i think it’d be so fun to go on a trip with them because it’s the perfect balance!! they’re chaotic clowns but they also won’t hesitate to give you a piggyback ride if your feet really hurt or if your shoes are giving you blisters (oikawa will try and make iwa give him a piggyback ride too, though). you guys end up getting a lot closer and having a TON of photos and inside jokes at the end of the trip, and though you’re all reluctant to go back, you also all know that this is only the beginning of a lot more outings together! if you take little clips of various events throughout the trip and compile them all together into a little vlog they’ll all probably watch it together through zoom or discord screenshare or something loool

THIS IS SO LONG take a shot (of water) every time i say one of the guys’ names or if i say “everyone” or some variation of it FJDJSNS seijoh 4 brainrot things am i right.....i hope you enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing and thinking of this! i think in the future i might think of stuff for if you go on a trip with the miya twins (and maybe suna too?).....hmmm hmmm hmmm!!! —🌸

— from elle ! i love this so so much >_< like literally what do i have to do to go on a road trip with the seijoh four??? it would be so much fun and chaotic and i want that for me,, i love them and their friendship so much it's insane ;-; anyways, thoughts + additions under the cut <33 thank you for this !!

everyone who isn't driving makes it their mission to annoy the one who is; whether it's through repeatedly poking their cheek, asking how long of the drive they have left, etc. the person who can last the longest in driver's seat would probably be iwaizumi, all his years playing volleyball with them as prepared him for this moment — but also looked up breathing exercises to avoid getting angry.

the best person to have riding shotgun would most be mattsun, especially when it's really late or super early ; keeps the conversation going and doesn't fall asleep, even when everyone in the backseat is. he shotguns energy drinks every hour or so.

i love the idea of oikawa, makki, and mattsun acting out a whole saga in the backseat omg !! in my head it's a song like taylor swift's love story wherein makki is the love interest, oikawa is taylor, and mattsun is like the dad who doesn't want them together. they really go all out on the acting — oikawa might have let out a couple of tears — and even iwa cracks a lil smile from the driver's seat.

awe timeskip!iwa watching out for everyone's diets ;-; but i do agree that he's gonna let up a bit considering that everyone doesn't see each other all the time. but i feel like he gives everyone the look™ every now and then despite this.

aw cmon don't hit me with oikawa making his background me leaning on his shoulder as i sleep that's so adorable i might cry :<< but other photos taken during naps include : iwa leaning on oikawa’s shoulder, makki sleeping with his eyes halfway-open ??? mattsun’s face covered in stickers that you impulse-bought at a random stopover.

sheet masks with the boys ??? yes pls !! though iwa would definitely be the type to almost wash his face after and oikawa screeched just before he was able to splash water on his face.

but late in the night heart to hearts ??? ugh, peak softness from the boys — everyone cries at some point because woah all of you really grew so much since high school and it made everyone feel all warm and tender.

but at some point, without thinking, and also bec it’s late and what does he have to lose, iwa just goes “you know, i had a crush on you when we were in high school” at yn and everyone just goes ?!?!?!?!?

yn : what the hell i had a crush on you ????

and oikawa’s just cackling in the background like, “i knew it !!!! both of you kept saying i was crazy for pushing it i feel so vindicated rn”

meanwhile makki hands mattsun some money because they bet on it years ago and they were finally getting answers — makki thought you would confess first and mattsun thought it would be iwa ; several years too late but at least ;//

also i would just love to fall asleep in between oikawa and mattsun,,, please how do i get that

also on mattsun’s panoramas: everyone likes moving around a lot when he takes those photos and it’s the perfect mix of weird and cool because yeah there are like five makki’s but one of them looks like he has a third arm and a triangular head

and the vlog and we all get to watch it together over discord ???? that’s it, that’s what i want ;-;

tldr; I would give anything to go on a road trip with the seijoh four ;((

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

a question: what are the hq characters like on a road trip? | written on the margins masterlist

taglist : @haikyuutothetop @crystal-lilac @tobioespresso @sushijimawakatoshi @itsmeaudrieee @pantherhappy @jesssobs @mysticstrawberryballoon @cloudedsky_29 @sakusasimpbot @aoirohi @kokogxddess @tooru--o @meiankolia

join my hq taglist here. <3

#seijoh four road trip how ???#I wanna go on one with them so bad :<<#written on the margins 🔖#haikyuu hcs #🎐 — 🌸sakuranon! <3

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sonicringnoise · 3 years

Text

Have a Jak 3 rant

Okay, I need to talk about Jak 3 and just...how absolutely janky the plot is.

This rant is extremely long, so I put it under the cut.

First of all, I just want to point out, I love this game. I love it so much, and it’s my favorite out of the trilogy. But it just...it could have been so much better, guh.

And I know that development of this game was rushed (hell, it only came out a year after Jak 2), but I’m still going to rant about it!

It starts out just fine, with the Wasteland and Spargus and the arena, but it gets so weird as it goes on. Just...really disjointed.

We never really find out why Jak keeps going after eco crystals. Seriously, he gets a dark eco crystal from the Dark Maker at the beginning of the game, a light eco crystal from Seem, and just...starts collecting them, for some reason? Like, was he going to make a necklace? Start a rock collection? It’s never explained.

But whatever, it turns out those are needed later in the game to save the world. Fine.

After some Spargus-y missions, we then go...to the Monk Temple. You know, the temple. That’s never been mentioned before, and we didn’t even know existed, but we just went up there to explore and stuff and...

Like, how hard would it have been to have a line where Seem says, “We monks live far to the north, in a temple in the mountains.”

Then we’d at least have a reason to go there. But no, instead we just show up there and start poking around.

This is one of my biggest issues with the game. In Jak 2, there are cutscenes that set up these missions, or even communications in gameplay that tell us where to go. In Jak 3, there’s just...a lot of that missing.

But, fine. Whatever, Jak has, like, ESPN or something.

At the volcano, Jak gets a dark power of invisibility, I guess. But only when he touches certain statues, and it’s only ever really used to get past a few traps and then never again.

Oddly enough, this was something that...made sense? I mean, invisibility is actually a power that dark eco has. Remember in Jak 2, there were metal heads who could turn invisible.

But it’s never used! And that complaint holds true for almost every power Jak gets. You basically use the powers when a prompt comes on screen to get through a one-time obstacle, and then never again.

Then we find out Veger is talking to the monks, but no one ever really expands on why? Or how? Like, for a city hidden in the Wasteland and forgotten, a lot of fucking people know it exists!

Speaking of which...

We meet Ashelin in the desert and she begs us to come back to Haven City. Jak asks her how she knows Damas and she answers, “It doesn’t matter now.”

Excuse me??

It totally does matter! If Ashelin knows Damas, it begs the question: does she know that Jak is his son? Does she know the Kid is his son? Does she even know about the Kid?

I mean, Ashelin would almost have to know that Jak is Damas’ son: during this scene, she gives him his seal back and says, “Don’t you remember who you are?”

Whatever. Add that to the list of things that are never mentioned again.

Jak says he’s not coming back to the city, because he’s an angry teenager and he likes hanging around with his Sand Dad.

This is immediately followed by Jak returning to Haven City.

We head to the Monk Temple, again for no reason. This time, we open up some doors and Pecker leads us back to the city.

There is no explanation as to why Jak has a change of heart. I actually think that the scene where Damas and Jak had a heart-to-heart and he mentions his lost son should be here: it leads perfectly into Jak deciding that the Greater Good is more important than his feelings.

Instead, we get nothing. Nada. Zilch. Just Jak heading back to Haven City because it’s The Thing To Do.

We reach Haven City after a boss battle and meet with Samos and Keira. Samos sucks, but that’s in character. Keira has no lines in this scene, and only makes goofy faces. Seriously, look:

That’s it, that’s the character.

Like, what’s happening in this scene? What’s going on with you, Keira? Are you okay? Are you making bedroom eyes at Jak? Are you confused? Did you smoke some of your father’s funny herbs again?

(Again, I know Keira’s role got cut down a lot because they changed voice actors, but it’s...so...jarring for a normally prominent character to suddenly get shoved into the background.)

We do some missions for Torn and eventually find out that Erol is the bad guy. Never explained how Erol survived slamming his Zoomer into dark eco and exploding in front of a huge crowd, but at this point, it’s whatever.

We continue on our journey: Tess is a furry, Samos is useless, Torn is...Torn.

We get a scene with Sig where Jak and Daxter ask him about Damas and his job as a spy and all that stuff. Fine, well and good, except the following exchange happens:

Jak: You’re playing with people’s lives!

Sig: Why not? They played with mine.

I’m sorry??

There’s a story there, and I’d like to know! What the hell happened to Sig? Why is nothing ever explained??!!

We get some Dadmas feelings, then we head over to have a chat with Kleiver. And this happens:

Jak: Kleiver, I need to find some very special Precursor artifacts, but I’m running out of time.

...Are you?? Has that been established?

So, in one of the previous missions, Samos mentions over the communicator (during gameplay, not in a cutscene) that to activate some ruins in Haven Forest, you’ll need some artifacts. But all he says is this:

Samos: Mar wrote that there was some ancient ruins to the west that were activated by five special artifacts and revealed wondrous truths. I'll see what I can find out.

That’s it! There’s never a cutscene where Samos says you need to find the Holo Cube, the Quantum Reflector, the Beam Generator, the Prism, and...by the way, there is no 5th artifact. Samos, you’re full of shit.

(Unless the Eco Sphere you get from Seem towards the end counts, but it’s very unclear.)

And, by the way, I had to Google those artifact names. The artifacts are never actually named until you acquired them in-game. Jak just finds random artifacts and is like, “Welp, this’ll do it! How convenient!”

Sigh.

Once we get all these artifacts no one told us about, we’re told to go take a cab down to the center of the earth. We don’t do that, and instead blow some shit up to visit our friends in person again.

(Quarantine mood, really.)

And, again, I can’t get over how much of a non-character Keira is. Seriously, she just stands there and claps like a 3-year-old.

And we also come to my own personal pet peeve: the scene where Ashelin strips Veger of his title.

I can’t with this shit.

The biggest issue I have with this game, from a story standpoint, is how quickly the inciting incident is resolved. Like, Jak being banished is the whole reason we have a Jak 3. The city turned against him; his anti-hero choices in Jak 2 led to him being blamed for the war in Jak 3. It made sense.

But Ashelin decides, 75% through the game, to just be like, “Naw, Veger, fuck you. Get out of my face, buh bye.”

It just pisses me off, because if Ashelin had that power, why didn’t she use it before Jak was banished??

And why is Jak okay with this? Why is Moody McAngerface not even a little annoyed that she didn’t care enough to do this when he was dying of heatstroke in the desert?

Uuuuuuggggghhhhh guys I don’t understand.

So we see Vin again, blow some more stuff up, fight Erol, and get some tentacle wings. Seem acts all nice to us and gives us a present we didn’t know we needed. More Dadmas ensues, we see the Dark Maker ship for some reason, blow even more stuff up.

Finally, it’s time to head to the catacombs. We get into some trouble with Dark Makers (even though there’s only, like, three of them), and Damas busts through the goddamn wall in a car.

No idea how he got here, considering the Wasteland appears to be an island, but whatever, it’s a badass scene.

Then, because Jak can’t have anything nice, they get hit and crash the car all over Damas’ legs.

Seriously, dude, I get that you might be dying from blood loss, but why are you coughing, your lungs are fine.

So Damas dies, Jak is his long-lost son, it’s very sad, and Veger you piece of shit.

I will forever be salty that Veger, who was an overall excellent villain, was sidelined for Erol of all people. Admittedly, Jak 2 did the same thing with Praxis, but Kor was a much better Big Bad than Erol.

Regardless, we then get the Worst Plot Twist Ever, when we find out the Precursors are ottsels.

Moving on from that tragedy, we then get to fight Erol. The fight sucks, it’s boring and I hate driving the stupid Wasteland buggies.

And then the end comes, and my blood pressure skyrockets. Somewhere, my PCP senses a disturbance.

The Precursors being ottsels is stupid, but Jak telling them to call him “Mar” is even stupider. First of all, Jak does not seem like the kind of person to get sentimental over his birth name. It’s weird, and I don’t like it.

Second of all, the ottsel leader calls him Mar once, directly after that. And then never again.

Seriously, 90 seconds after Jak says he wants to be known as Mar, this happens:

I’m sorry, what’s that?

Why would you add that line in about Jak wanting to be called by his birth name, and then ignore it a minute and half later??!!

It just infuriates me. There’s a lot of stuff in Jak 3 that does this: it’s touched on once, then it’s gone forever.

And let’s talk about Daxter’s wish. I actually find this particular decision - where Daxter chooses to wish for pants instead of being human again - totally believable.

Despite how much Daxter is regarded as the comic relief idiot of the duo, he’s actually shown to be pretty sharp. He’s definitely observant. And at this point, remember that he’s already seen the Precursors at work: he saw them turn Veger into an ottsel.

So Daxter probably realized that these guys were on some monkey paw, be-careful-what-you-wish-for bullshit and decided to wish for the most innocuous thing he could. Who knows what would happen if he actually asked to become human again? Might come out lookin’ like Samos.

And he’s right, by the way! Look at what those assholes did to my baby Tess. They could’ve just got her a size 6 pair of Levi’s and been like, “Here, boom, pants.”

But nooo, they turned her into an ottsel, too, because why not why the fuck not nothing matters ahhhhHHHHHHHHH

...

Anyway, like I said, Jak 3 is my favorite in the series. It had such potential. It’s like a puzzle that’s missing pieces. I like it more for what it could have been, rather than the absolute mess it actually is.

#jak and daxter #rant #jak 3 #i shouldn't be allowed to talk about video games #but it's just such bullshit

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ladyfawkes · 3 years

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[I know what you're thinking -- and the answer is NOPE. THIS IS NOT A REPOST. THIS IS THE ACTUAL THIRD UPDATE (count 'em, THREE!!) in less than a month!! WOOPAH!!!] Tangled Just Before Ever After Chapter 4: Down the Hatch Current word count: 10103 Chapter 4 Summary: How in the world does Eugene answer Rapunzel's question??? Can the author manage to eek out yet another chapter from within the Tower??? WILL OUR COUPLE EVER GET BACK TO CORONA?!? S0ooOoo MANY qUeStiONs!!11!!

Eugene gulped hard several times; the silence stretched a bit too thin between his forthcoming answer and Rapunzel’s question. Eugene could feel that old standby instinct of wanting to lie through his teeth threatening to take over. But this was Rapunzel before him…. And this much he’d learned by now; if an honest woman confronts you about your past hookups, you should level with her. Though Eugene would've told Rapunzel whatever she wished to know, no matter when she chose to ask. After he’d been exploited for so many years by the likes of Stalyan and the Baron, Eugene had reached a breaking point fairly early on where he couldn’t bring himself to seduce the innocent anymore. He’d never liked doing that in the first place since it made him feel cheap, sleazy, and just all-out gross. Even grifters had to draw the line somewhere. It was yet another reason why he’d left Stalyan.

Eugene also knew that if he had to start running interference regarding his past during his first day as Eugene Fitzherbert the gentleman ….then he’d have to keep lying forever afterward….just like Flynn had. And Eugene was simply tired -- no, exhausted -- from all of the running, running, running. Flynn Rider had been on the move ever since he ditched the orphanage before his 10th year all those years ago. No more running, Eugene resolved. Even if leveling with the princess means she wants me out of the picture, so be it. She deserves to hear the truth from the source.

“Rapunzel….” Eugene began delicately, “the short answer to your question -- I’m sorry to say -- is far too many. But I’m requesting that we put a bookmark in that answer; we’ll circle back around to finish it.” Eugene nearly lost his nerve to continue after seeing the crestfallen look in Rapunzel’s eyes. He instead busied himself by locating the ring-shaped pull embedded in the trapdoor of the floor. After tugging on it, he noticed it wouldn’t budge. Without prompting, Rapunzel volunteered further information, explaining how when the princess was still little, Gothel always made her go up to the loft before she opened the trapdoor for her trips away. The crone never wanted the girl to figure out how to operate it. Thus Rapunzel said, “But you’re good at finding your way out of places. I figured you could make the mechanism work -- even without having seen Gothel’s trick to unlatching it.”

No sooner had Rapunzel said the word “unlatching” when a sharp click-THUNK issued from the floor. “Found it,” announced a smirking Eugene, as he moved the toe of his boot off of the otherwise camouflaged mechanism. He couldn’t help feeling a little smug after having effectively outthought that diabolical dead woman….again. The young man repositioned himself to again tug the metal ring and sure enough, the trapdoor swung open this time.

“After you,” said Eugene, gallantly gesturing Rapunzel down the next set of stairs.

“If only I had met you sooner,” Rapunzel said wistfully, as she shook her head. She’d tried to find that hidden mechanism in the floor for years. Eugene had discovered and figured out how to disarm it in mere seconds.

Eugene could not help his contrite chuckle. “Rapunzel, if we had met sooner -- even one year earlier, I doubt I ever could’ve left this place the first time. But it would’ve been for an entirely different reason.”

“Oh, yeah?” Rapunzel challenged, an unexpected edge to her voice. She folded her arms and demanded, “And what’s that?”

“Well, for starters,” said Eugene, his voice becoming far more subdued, “you never would’ve reached the fateful decision to enter a trust agreement with the kingdom’s most disreputable scoundrel. I mean….how could you?” Eugene pondered softly. “Especially based on the faulty info you’d been given about the world in general, you wouldn’t have had a reason yet to take the chance on our deal. Gothel’s control freakishness….hadn’t yet pushed you to the brink. Instead, she would’ve come home, you would’ve had no choice but to tell her that you’d caught me breaking in, and….well….”

“Don’t say that,” Rapunzel abruptly cut him off, abandoning her walk down the stairs, instead rushing over to grab Eugene’s free hand. “Don’t you ever say that,” she admonished, eyes wide. “Even if you had remained a perfect rogue stranger to me, Eugene Fitzherbert, I never would’ve wanted that old crone to hurt you on purpose. And especially not like... this,” finished Rapunzel, once more stretching her palm and pressing it against the jagged bloody tear in his doublet. A renewed ember of hope sparked inside him. And before he knew it, Rapunzel was apologizing, of all things!

“I….I’m sorry I put you on the spot that way regarding, ah, any prior relationships. It wasn’t fair of me to throw something like that on you so suddenly.” Meekness overtook Rapunzel and she looked at the floor, absently tracing out an invisible half-circle with her big toe. “Besides,” she confessed, “I only did it to distract you from my own awkwardness. But….but you kept…..insisting I should tell you what was bothering me since you are trustworthy.” Eugene was swift and carefully set the trapdoor down with the hinge open outward. He also briefly removed and set down his satchel.

The anxious young man went directly to Rapunzel with open arms but halfway through the motion thought that perhaps he shouldn’t, because Eugene didn’t want her to feel obligated to reciprocate. So the keyed-up man kept his fingers curled into his palms rather than reach out, and he kept his arms from raising above waist height. He was half-frozen, trying earnestly not to telegraph what he truly wished to do.

Eugene’s own thumbs must’ve betrayed him, though, as they involuntarily flexed, splaying outward from his balled fists. Rapunzel approached him and briefly gazed into his eyes with a hint of smile behind her own. She proceeded to lean over and take each of his hands, in turn, and tenderly kiss each errant thumb, in turn. Yet any embarrassment Eugene felt over her keen perception would soon melt away. For the princess took his left wrist and placed his arm over her right shoulder, took his right wrist and guided his arm around her waist, and then she mirrored the gesture with her own arms around him. The pair had briefly stopped their world to oh-so-carefully melt deeply into each other. After some time, they briefly broke their embrace. Rapunzel drew her arms in and criss-crossed her upper body with them, tucking in right up against Eugene’s chest. This allowed the sweet young man to attentively draw the princess into himself so tightly, nearly tight enough for him to wrap his arms around her twice as he buried his entire face into her silken hair. Each time they embraced….Eugene was simply floored with just how perfectly they “fit” one another; she could nestle comfortably and flush against his own shape, creating a head-to-toe highway of warmth and love.

Eventually, contented humming issued from Rapunzel’s throat. “I’ve never felt this safe before,” she murmured in awe, her face still pillowed against Eugene’s chest. “Nobody’s ever held me like this before either.” This realization had moved the princess to tears. Eugene leisurely placed a ring of popcorn kisses around the crown of her head in effort to soothe. “Dearest Sunshine of mine,’ he whispered into her hair, “I can promise you there’s so much more where that came from…..” and he was able to draw her imperceptibly closer into himself.

Soon moisture pricked the corners of his own eyes, for Eugene had a similar epiphany to Rapunzel’s. In all his years of relative isolation on the run, Rider never once allowed himself to partake in anything on this type of intimacy level. He’d always been keen to its existence, though. And he knew it was so much deeper and more meaningful than sex. And being the secretly sensitive person Eugene was, it was something he furtively craved but couldn’t bring himself to put that type of expectation upon another human being, knowing the unfavorable lifestyle he led.

And here this fractured thief managed to get caught up within a perfect healing ray of sunlight….and she was willing to take him on along with all his demons, even without knowing the full story in advance. And boy, did he ever have more than his fair share of demons. In spite of himself, Eugene had to say it again. “Sunshine…..I don’t deserve you.”

He immediately heard a tiny huff of impatience from her. “Eugeeeeeene,” Rapunzel overemphasized with mild vexation, “deserving or not, I’ve chosen you. You are forever my new dream. So….so start acting like it….please?” she implored, gazing at him with wide-open concerned eyes. Even her pep talk to him had proven about as rough and tumble as dandelion fluff.

“For you, Sunshine.” Eugene caressed her cheek. “It’ll be a struggle for awhile….but I will no longer speak of ‘deserving to have you.’ I shall instead focus on ‘building new dreams with you’.”

“Thank you,” Rapunzel said gratefully. “It….just….hurts me to see you thinking so much less of yourself due to circumstances now beyond your control.” She slipped her hand into Eugene’s own. And it was that moment he finally found an opening to finish what he started.

“Circling back to the bookmark in our conversation…. Rapunzel…. Ever since the first time you chose to address me as Eugene, everything...the past few days...has been unlike anything I’ve ever felt or experienced with any woman before. It’s all new….all of it. So many firsts already. Nonetheless, you still have every right to ask me about whomever I’ve been with prior to when we met. And while I do intend to eventually tell you about those encounters -- if that’s what you want -- you should also be aware that for me, Eugene Fitzherbert, it’s still a little too soon to openly discuss much of anything just yet. But I will try for your sake, if that’s what you need.” He briefly bowed his head, his eyelids automatically sliding shut.

Rapunzel was so fleet-footed that Eugene had not heard her change positions to where she grabbed his satchel, immediately encouraged Eugene to open his eyes and to help a struggling Pascal who was now lugging a forgotten cast-iron frying pan, and she started down the steps at long last. That was….abrupt, Eugene thought to himself. If Rapunzel was perpetually so talented at keeping him on his toes, then he’d best get himself some better boots -- and soon!

“You okay?” asked Eugene, just to make sure. He grabbed the brass ring of the trapdoor and just before he closed it…..he looked around the Tower one last time. He knew that he should feel the most ominous and terrified that he’d ever felt, especially upon glimpsing his own bloodstain on the floor. But something…..someone was protecting him. And even though he was neither superstitious nor believed in ghosts, once in awhile he would privately allow himself the indulgence of conjuring up invented people and imagery from his past. Fleetingly an image of who could only be his mother comes to mind; it was her spirit that must’ve been shielding him from the worst of today’s trauma, he decided. Thank you, he mouths the words to a seemingly empty Tower, pulling the trapdoor tight shut forever.....

“I’m more than okay,” Rapunzel replied enthusiastically, as she made her way down the dingy spiral staircase. “Who cares about past relationships when you can tell me about all of those firsts you just mentioned instead?”

Eugene almost -- almost -- laughed aloud with relief. Here he had been so worried about past relationship questions when Rapunzel instead wanted to be told all about the present. Three days, and this was the only thing he’d come across so far in which Rapunzel was anything like any other woman he’d met. And Eugene was more than happy to indulge her need to know just how special she had become to him and why.

A/N: I hate to do this (haven't done it here before) but I'm getting next to NO feedback and the same goes for reblogs. If you enjoy my writing, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE -- even if you write no review--reblog this?? It's the only way this story goes out anywhere. It's an author's life blood. You all know how isolating and ridiculous tumblr's stupid search algorithm is.....

#tangled fanfiction #my fanfiction #Rapunzel + Eugene #TJBEA #RTA #rapunzel's tangled adventure #pascal the chameleon #Frog #Tangled the Series #TTS #OTP #fanfiction romance

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flying-nightwing · 4 years

Text

Act III: The First Date

Hey guys!!! Fist of all thank you for 300 followers, I know it might not be a lot to some of you but it’s more I ever thought I’d even get! With that out of the way, I finally got to write part 3! I’m happy with this one, I hope you do as well. It’s got a bit less action... Or does it? 🤔 haha you’ll see. Enjoy!

Part 1 and 2 in Masterlist!

Part 4 out now!

Pairing: Time Drake x Reader

Word count: 3234

Warning: violence, language

Tim had called you if you were alright.

You had been surprised at first by his alarmed tone, remembering you were supposed to be by the pits when the race car had gone through. You had reassured him you were fine, startled but fine, and then you had talked for a while. The call had ended up on him asking you out on an official date, which you had obviously agreed on.

So there you were, following the waiter into the fancy restaurant. He had not believed you when you said you were there for Tim Drake, but after a death glare and veiled threat that made his smug face fall, he had invited you to come with him. He led you to a more intimate area, where you finally made eye contact with Tim.

You could have sworn his jaw dropped.

He clumsily stood up and wiped his hands on his pants, making you smile. You ignored the waiter and whatever he said before leaving, taking in your date for the evening. He was wearing a probably expensive midnight blue suit and his hair was gelled back like the other day at the track. He finally shook out of his stupor and smiled, walking around the table to properly greet you.

“Hi” He breathed out. “I’m glad you could make it”

“Wouldn’t miss it for anything” You winked, letting him pull your chair for you. What a gentleman. He sat back in front of you, the candle on the table reflecting in his bright eyes.

“You look stunning” He complimented, his cheeks reddening. Your outfit was black with a red accent, and it was like he couldn’t tear his eyes away from it. You actually put a lot of effort in it, as you didn’t have a lot of occasion to dress up for another reason than for a costume change. It felt good to pamper up.

“Thank you” You inclined your head politely. “You’re not too bad yourself”

He chuckled, fidgeting with his fingers in a way that seemed restless. “Thanks”

“How are you?” You asked with a tilt of your head. “You seem stressed”

He blinked quickly, taken aback by your directness. But he knew you were right, and if he had learned anything from your few conversations so far, it was that you were just very forward. That’s kind of what he liked about you. He sighed. “It’s just… A lot is going on a work and to be honest, it’s kinda driving me nuts”

Your hand enveloped his in a reflex, giving him a concerned squeeze. “Oh my, if this isn’t a good time I swear I won’t be mad if you wanted to reschedule--”

“No, it’s fine” He shook his head with a small, grateful smile. “I think this is what I need, actually”

You grinned bright, and the sight alone made his heart melt. “Then let’s take your mind off of work”

Dinner went even smoother than you would have expected. The conversation barely had the time to die down to let you eat, so much that both of you had to finish your plates after the food went cold. It didn’t bother you much as Tim proved himself to be far more interesting than food. You learned a lot about him, especially after the first glass of wine kicked in. While he had been slightly awkward in a cute way and had trouble initiating the conversations at first, he had easily become chatty. He was quite the funny guy, and you could see why he had proclaimed himself the smartest of his siblings. His mind was quick and sharp, and he knew way too much about way too many things. But the way he kept babbling about his interests was quite endearing, you found out.

“No but seriously” He said as he placed back his glass on the table. “You have some serious reflexes. The way you dodged the champagne? Like are you kidding me?”

“I told you” You shrugged lightly, barely hiding the smirk on your lips. “It’s always like that! The waiter could drop the bottle of wine and I’d catch it, I swear”

“Should we try?”

“To make him drop it?” Your eyes widened. “Are you really ready to waste perfectly good wine?”

“You said you’d catch it” He challenged. “Are you saying you wouldn’t manage to catch it?”

“Of course I’d catch it” You scoffed playfully. “But the probability of me not catching it is never 0. While the internal factor is guaranteed, the external factor is not. I don’t control what happens around me. What if the waiter drops it outside of my reach? What if the fish tank explodes?”

Tim laughed heartily at that one. “Alright, alright, I’ll give this one to you”

“Thank you” You smiled, your chin high. “On that note, I need to go to the bathroom”

“Knock yourself out”

You chuckled and stood up, heading for the bathroom. You paused in front of the door and turned around to scan the room, making sure nobody was coming or looking in your direction. Your eyes paused on Tim, who was looking down at his cellphone. When you were sure the coast was clear, you swiftly turned around and went through the kitchens. You walked alongside the wall, avoiding the actual kitchen buzzing with staff, going past the pantries and freezers. You pushed the last door through the storage rooms, then paused and crouched behind a pile of potato sacks.

You really didn’t want to do this while on your date, but the reward was too good to ignore. Since it was a solo mission as well, you’d get the full pay to yourself. An entire million for a single bullet made you put your principles aside. You reached for your gloves first, slipping them on, then your handgun hidden in your outfit and the silent. You assembled it on the nozzle and made sure your magazine was full. The restaurant, while an actual high end and high rated place, was also a front for one of the ascending crime families of Gotham. Falcone wanted the patriarch dead, and you were glad to be of assistance in the matter.

You lifted your left arm and folded your eyebrow, then rested your gun on it, aiming for the surveillance camera at the threshold of the other room. You needed it to be a precise shot to disable the camera without making it sparkle like a firework. You took a deep breath and set your sight on your target, then pressed the trigger. With a quiet sound of metal breaking, you observed a small, but barely noticeable spark and you knew you were clear to go. You moved into the next room, still hiding behind various piles of ingredients. There was one guard at the bottom of the staircase leading to the big boss hideout.

You grabbed a turnip from an open bag and threw it back in the room you were before, making sure to hit the spare pots piled up on a shelf. Like a dumbass, the startled guard left his post to go investigate, letting you more than enough time to slip in undetected. The stairs gave into a dark room clouded by cigar smoke and years of uncleaned grim on the walls, from which came a voice in a phone conversation. The man was yelling profanities on the phone, coughing every now and then. You waited in the shadows for the eventual click signalling he had hung up, then the sigh coming from him.

“Rough night?”

The man jumped at your question, his eyes widening at your presence. Then, a sneer twisted his already hard features and he reached for a red button on his desk. He never made it to the button. You were a fast shot, and before he could comprehend anything that was happening, his head was sent back with a bullet hole in between his eyebrows.

“Carmine Falcone sends his regards” You took off the silent and hid the gun again, unbothered. “Should have said that before I shot him uh? Whatever”

You walked to the body, carefully folding the arms on the desk and lowering the head on them, careful not to spill blood everywhere, so it looked like he was sleeping. It wouldn’t fool anyone on the long haul, but it might buy enough time to delay the news stories and give you the time to put enough distance in between you and the crime scene. You then headed for the open window and sneaked out through the fire escape, rounding back to the merchandise entrance and sneaking back inside the restaurant as you took off your gloves. You returned to your table as if nothing happened, making Tim look up in concern.

“Is everything alright?” He asked as you sat back down.

“Yes” You huffed, but gave him a smile nonetheless. “My mom kept blowing up my phone, so I took a moment to call her and politely requested her to stop asking me how to change her settings on her tablet. I’m so sorry to have made you wait”

“It’s okay, don’t worry” He chuckled. “I understand annoying family”

“Alright then, which one of your siblings is most likely to annoy you on a date?”

“Are we playing 21 questions now?” He raised a playful eyebrow and you tilted your head. He pursed his lips, thinking. “Most obvious answer would be Grayson because he knows no boundaries”

You laughed. “Then what is the least obvious answer?”

“Huh, well, I’d say Damian” He replied. “He doesn’t even call often, but when he does, he doesn’t give a shit if he’s interrupting something”

“The youngest one, right?” You asked, and he nodded. You had gotten around to talk about family, and you managed to mostly remember the order of his siblings. You didn’t want to research them either--even though you knew you easily could--because you didn’t want to be that creep that googled their date.

“Is everything alright for you?”

Tim seemed surprised at the sudden interruption of the waiter. Like every other time he came by, he completely avoided looking in your general direction. He still was shaken up from your earlier threats, probably, and it made you smile internally.

“Yes, actually, can we get the check?” Tim replied, then turned his glance to you. “What do you say we go, maybe take a walk outside?”

“Absolutely” Your smile widened.

“Very well, sir”

The waiter walked away, leaving you once again alone. You began reaching for your purse when you felt Tim’s unwavering stare on you. He looked a bit confused as to why you were taking out your card.

“I’ll pay my half, I owe you that”

“No, no, I can take it” He shook his head. “It’s really no problem”

“That bottle of wine was expensive, let me at least--”

“(Y/N), I forbid you to even look at the tab”

You raised an eyebrow, your lips curling up slightly. You were surprised by his sudden display of authority, as you had been so far the most forward of the two. But he was a CEO after all, and you suspected he let this side of him take over just a little moment. Still, you couldn’t say you disliked it. “Bossy” You remarked. “Okay, fine. But rest assured I will make it up to you”

“You really don’t have too” Here came the shy side again.

“Oh, but I want to” You winked, and he blushed. He cleared his throat when he noticed the waiter coming back, then hurried to take the tab before you could snatch it. He was you in action already and he knew you had fast reflexes enough not to take any chances.

He paid for dinner, then pulled back your chair and offered you his arm. You gladly took it and exited the restaurant. You waited outside for the valet to fetch his car, and opened the door for you when it came to a stop in front of you. He then rounded up the car and took his place in the driver’s seat.

“Damn” You whistled as you looked around. “Nice ride”

“Thanks” He chuckled as he started the engine and left the restaurant. “Perks of being a CEO I guess”

“And here I thought my new Toyota was somewhat luxury” You joked, and he grinned.

“Not bad, you could have done way worse” He conceded. “Although, I would have pegged you for a Tesla kind of person”

“Would you now?” You raised a playful eyebrow.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong” He began, shooting you a quick glance before his eyes returned to the road. “But you don’t seem to be the type to settle for anything less than the best"

Your lips curled up as your eyes travelled up and down his form. “I don’t, indeed”

He shifted in his seat, well aware of your gaze on him. He truly looked like a work of art, sitting deep in his seat with one hand on the wheel and the other on the gear arm. He was visibly forcing himself to focus on the road and not on the distraction you caused, and it made you smirk. You definitely enjoyed seeing his reaction to you, how he would mostly shy away or blush at your obvious flirting.

Tim pulled up in a private parking garage and stopped his car in his own designed spot. He turned off the engine, and once again, rounded up the car to open your door for you. You took his offered hand to get out, and with a press of a button, the doors closed and locked behind you. Arms in arms, you got outside under the clouded sky, a soft, warm wind caressing your skin. The building gave onto a small park lit up with fairy lights along the pathways, and you could hear a violin playing some tunes in the background. You sighed, content.

“It’s a beautiful night” He commented after a moment. “It’s rare we have one like this”

“I had heard the city was gloomy all the time” You lied smoothly. You lived here, you knew. “I’m pleasantly surprised”

“It’s too bad you got to Gotham during such a bad weekend, crime wise” He began. “I mean, it’s like that most of the time, but it’s been a little intense in the last days”

“Yeah, it’s a bit concerning for outsiders” You agreed with a nod. “But tonight did make up for it pretty well, if you ask me”

A smile graced his lips as he looked at you. “It did”

You walked around the park, talking about nothing and everything. You stopped by a street musician, taking the time to dance for a moment despite his reluctance to do so. You could still see the timid smile threatening to widen as you swayed to the sound of the balad, though, even more so when you parted and left a hundred dollars bill in the little jar at the violinist's feet. The walk ended at the front of his apartment building, where he turned to face you without letting your hand go. He looked down to it, then back up to you.

“This was really nice,” He spoke. “I really did enjoy it”

“Me too” You smiled, squeezing his hand.

You watched as he slightly leaned in, then backed away, unsure of where to go from now. There was a doubt in his eyes, a calculation of boundaries he was hesitant to challenge. Yet, he didn’t make a move to get away from you either. You could see he was overthinking it way too much, so you decided to step in.

“This is the part where you kiss me” You pointed out, your smile not dropping.

He cleared his throat like he was taken by surprise. Still, his hand cupped your cheek as he leaned down, pressing lightly his lips on yours. It started as a sweet little goodnight kiss, but he quickly let his restraint go when your eagerness got to him. He pressed you against him, caging you in strong arms as your lips moved in sync. You felt his hands grip your hips tight and let out a surprised squeal against his mouth. He parted from you, his breath ragged and pupils dilated. You definitely were interested in seeing more of this side of him.

“Come upstairs?”

“I thought you’d never ask”

----

Tim hadn’t had a morning this smooth in years. He still had a lazy smile from the night before, and he truly noticed how good he felt when he actually took the time to pour his coffee in a mug. He even surprised himself when he reached for a sugar cube and dropped it in the dark beverage; he couldn’t remember when was the last time he drank his coffee anything but black and bitter. The only thing that could have made this morning even better was if you had been there with him, wearing one of his shirts and holding your own mug.

You had seemed so heartbroken when you told him you couldn’t stay the night, he wasn’t even mad. A little disappointed, yes, but not mad. After all, it was only your first date together, it was to be expected. But he was whipped already. Your charm got to him so hard, and he was still amazed by how easy everything was with you. You were really expressive, but you didn’t make him feel inadequate for not being instantly as open as you. Instead, he felt like you bridged the gap for him and offered a hand. He had only met you a few days ago, but it was like you knew each other forever. Yup, definitely whipped.

He hummed, walking to his living room and turning on the TV. It was set to a news channel, and right as he was about to change it for a less depressing morning programm, something caught his attention. He furrowed his eyebrows, listening intensely to the newscaster. They were talking about the restaurant you had your date at last evening, where it was shown footage of police tape and ambulances crowding the place. A bad feeling formed in his stomach as he waited for what he knew inside was to come.

The owner, and rising mafia boss Marco Rizzo, had been found dead in his office.

Before he could even formulate his thoughts, his brain sent him pieces of the puzzle he had already ruled out. All he could think of was one’s an accident, two’s a coincidence and three’s a pattern.

The gala. The racetrack. The first date.

There was one person, beside himself, who he could without a doubt position in all three crime scenes, who had both the place and time suspiciously right. One person that had smoothly changed the subject, now that he thought about it, everytime he mentioned a job, a family, or the events that took place in Gotham. One person of whom he saw the scar on the left forearm when they were laying naked in bed, that gave a half assed explanation of how a fresh mark the size of his batarang ended up there.

And that person was you.

He squeezed his mug so hard it broke in his hands, spilling coffee everywhere.

#tim drake x reader #tim drake imagine #tim drake x you #tim drake fic #red robin x reader #tim drake #red robin #red robin imagine #dc #dcu #dc universe #dc imagine #dcu imagine #dc universe imagine #imagine #red robin x you #batfam #batfam imagine

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thinkingaboutitalittle · 4 years

Text

ｔｉｇｈｔｒｏｐｅ

summary: “It’s capital, this tightrope that the two of you walk between harsh discipline and sweet indulgence.”

pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

warnings: mentions of violence, red room, implied age gap-ish, it’s a little angsty? kinda hurt comfort but there’s plot

a/n: hi again! I really like the concept of this one! I hope you like it too, feedback is definitely welcome

word count: 2.2k ish

When he’d first met you, you were the antithesis to what he’d expected. Prepped with the information that you were a recruit found in one of the last scattered branches of HYDRA’S Red Room and trained to have the strength and endurance of a skilled olympian, when you’d been introduced all wide-eyed and with a bright smile that had a smear of peanut butter at its corner, Bucky was floored. Fresh from Wakanda and losing his best friend, he didn’t think it’d work, the two of you running together.

And at first he was right, things were rough. Technically, you were and still are his apprentice, obligated to attend general training and conditioning sessions with him as your guide. You’d had an impeccable persistence and the skill set that HYDRA engraved into your physicality was more than enough to get you through, but Bucky had the experience. You were strong and good at taking direction, but HYDRA had trained the instinct and critical thinking out of you, and the process of finding your footing with your newfound freedom was difficult.

There were arguments over the ungodly hours that he’d chosen scheduled for sparring sessions (“Are you shitting me Barnes? You want me to wake up at five in the morning to get decked in the face?”), about whether or not certain techniques were viable in fighting situations (“Biting into someones arm while they’ve got you in a headlock isn’t reliable option doll, especially if the arm is made out of vibranium”), and when the two of you were extra frustrated, eating habits were also up for debate (“You cannot only eat pop tarts the week before a mission!” “I’ll stop eating pop tarts the day you give Sam a compliment,”).

But eventually, when the two of you’d finally realized that your distaste for each other may have stemmed for a repressed attraction towards one another, you made it work. You Learn to fight without actually aiming to hurt the other person and you manage to communicate with one another with the exclusion of screaming matches and elongated lectures. (You also learn how to sneak into each others rooms without waking up other shield officers on your shared floor in the middle of the night, but that’s something neither of you care to define)

The two of you are sparring together late this afternoon after you’d convinced him of the fact that you’re far better suited to give him your focus after you’d fully awakened and consumed a healthy portion of your daily allotment of junk food.

“I already told you your elbows are too loose, don’t give me that shit again,”

You tighten your stance against the previously acclaimed Winter Soldier, and throw another, albeit cleaner, punch. A grunt of approval from Bucky and your movements continue to present themselves with precise stability.

“Christ, Barnes you’re stricter than my babysitters at camp HYDRA,” He smirks, appreciates the value of making light of a shitty situation, and then retorts,

“I’m prettier to look at though, huh?”

It’s capital, this tightrope that the two of you walk between harsh discipline and sweet indulgence.

You square your shoulders and dip your head in an attempt to seem more menacing, “Only in the dark, baby. I’m gonna kick your ass,”

Again he responds with a practiced snort, “Good fighters don’t reveal their strategy before they’ve done it, keep that chin up or I’m going to knock it next time you come near me,”

Somehow, amongst all the near misses and successful jabs to the stomach, a small smirk manages its way onto your face. Before you’d started to train with Bucky, fighting was a commitment you had no choice in deciding. You’d go through endless hours of getting beaten down, only to be forced back onto your feet and beaten again; bulldozed into compliance. Training with Bucky is different; dares you to test the boundaries and willingly push yourself to your limit, not because you have to but because you want to.

You solidify your strategy in your head before moving to deliver a swift kick to Bucky’s ankles. He dodges it, as expected, and plants himself on top of you, restraining your legs between his own and digging his enormous forearms into your biceps.

“I already told you, this shit won’t fly on anyone bigger than you, princess, you’re going to have to tap,” and boy, if only you’d had a body camera to record the way that his face slackens when you retaliate with, “C’mon Buck, you’re telling me it doesn’t get you off to be on top of a dame like me?”

It’s a low blow to use your unspecified status outside of the gym to your advantage, but what was it that he’d told you in your first training session? Ah yes, use whatever advantage you have to your benefit.

You were only following directions.

Quickly, you move his practically limp limbs from your body and force yourself onto his front, resting your knees atop his flesh and alloyed forearms (because goodness knows you wouldn’t be able to hold them down with your hands) and the rest of your weight on his torso. And he looks so helplessly confused in this position you can’t help yourself from speaking through a smug smile, “Never took you for a bottom, princess.”

Buckys going to crack your head like a walnut. He jerks upward to catch your head between his fists, but a sudden rush of alarms stops him in his tracks. All of the sudden, the shield compound is doused in red lights and an automated voice is eerily repeating there has been a breach in the compound, agents follow evacuation protocol. However, the warning comes late because only a few seconds after you and Bucky have detangled yourselves from each other, the doors to the training hall are bursting open with what has to be a group of wanna-be HYDRA affiliates demanding information and files about some secret mission that neither of you were a part of.

Regardless, Bucky is on his feet immediately and ushering you to stand behind his immense form, his tone gritting out a stiff, “Y/N. Behind me. Now.”. Though your developing sense of instinct is telling you that this situation is one that Bucky shouldn’t be handling alone, your feet move before your brain can catch up, eager to comply with his demands instead of challenging them.

The infiltrators are small in number but waste no time zeroing in on Bucky as soon as they realize his presence as the Winter Soldier. He pushes you into a locker, spitting out something about staying there until he handles them and direct orders, agent but you can’t help but crack the door open, fearing Bucky’s well being.

Surprising no one, Bucky can mostly handle himself against a group of middle-aged men who are scarcely trained and even more scarcely armed. However, in his struggle with one of the larger men in the group, Bucky fails to notice that one of the other Hydra members has managed to snatch a particularly large knife from his belt loop and is getting ready to dig it into his back in an attempt to save his comrade.

Emerging from the locker, you move to kick the knife out of the enemy’s hand, knocking it somewhere across the gym, and landing yourself in the middle of the brawl. In your haste, the agent swings a punch to your jaw, but you recover quickly. You knock the agent twice and before you can move to disable him further, Bucky finds his way to you and heaves the man a generous amount of yards away.

Before either of the chance to say anything to each other, the room is rushed by Shield agents searching to apprehend the HYDRA men and to find out any information regarding the infiltration.

It’s a couple of hours before you get to see Bucky again.

Between all of the shield officers asking painfully specific questions and their obnoxious insistence that things like this never happen, by the time Barnes finds you sitting in the compound kitchen, legs dangling from the center island and fingers wrapped around a lukewarm cup of tea, you’ve both had enough time to sit with previous events.

You’re ambivalent, a tricky mixture of guilt and pride making a home in the form of a lump in your throat. Part of you knows what you did was the right thing; if you’d have let Bucky get hurt, the other offender would have used the advantage to gang up on him and you’d’ve had to take on the both of them instead of just one. But there’s still a lingering part of you that feels an immense sense of shame for not wholly complying.

Maybe it’s just leftover conditioning from your time with HYDRA, the remaining indents from the ideals they’d ingrained into your mentality, but disobeying direct orders, no matter how irrelevant they may have proven themselves to be, left you with a bitter taste in your mouth and frustrating tears in your eyes. Even after training with Bucky for so long and recognizing the difference between appropriate and inappropriate times to act on your own volition, you still maneuver on a fine line between overwhelming shame and practiced action.

He moves in front of you, between your legs, and when he notices your refusal to look him in the eyes, Buck slips his thumb and forefinger under your chin lifting your misty eyes to his worried gaze. There’s a rush of bile rising in your throat that you know can only be remedied by a salve of words, “Bucky I- I’m so sorry I didn’t l-listen to y-,”

“If you finish that apology, I’m going to give you another shiner, princess,”

He stills you, maneuvering the hand that’s not holding your face to shift the tea out of your hands and then to rest on your bicep. Save for a handful of your sniffles and the soft noises Bucky makes in the back of his throat when his eyes focus on a particularly darkened or swollen segment of skin, the two of you maintain a quietness as he looks you over.

And - no matter how long he’s been fighting with you by his side and no matter how many times he’s scolded himself for feeling self-pity when others, you are in pain - this part never get easier; swallowing his pride and accepting the fact that not everyone can make it out unscathed.

He moves away from you to fish an icepack from the door of the fridge, holding it in his hand for a few seconds before setting it back in its spot and pressing his now cool metal palm to the side of your face. You sigh in relief, starting to come down from your thoughts, leaning into Bucky.

Finally, he speaks, “You didn’t do anything wrong,” you suck in a breath and he knows you’re preparing to refute his claim, so he cuts you off swiftly, “I know you think you fucked it up because that’s what they want you to think, but you acted on your instinct doll, you did good.”

Your breathing slows back down to its normal pace, and his thumb moves to wipe the tears off of your cheeks. It’s almost laughable how easily he gets you calm; how he’s managed to keep you from falling off of the tightrope and now rests on it with you, an unspoken in equilibrium. He nudges his nose to yours and smoothes a kiss to your lips, a final attempt at calming whatever stray nerves remain.

When he pulls away, you can’t help but chuckle. “What is it, sweetheart?”

Recovering with a weak smile you respond, “I get knocked twice for your ass and all I get is a little kiss?”

His smirk is cheeky as he presses another to your lips, this time deeper and more intentional, “You’re telling me this isn’t enough to get you off, princess?”

#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #marvel #eve wrote this #bucky barnes oneshot #winter soldier x reader #avengers #tfatws #bucky barnes x you #Bucky barnes x y/n #bucky one shot #bucky x you #bucky

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