#still i am sitting by the bright window and playing rain sounds while looking outside in anguish

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

ough i wanna draw so bad but my arms are virtually Unusable... too much lifting and hauling... in other news i felt True and Intense Pining today for the soft, delightful, tiny pig beanie baby in a diner gift shop. she was a wonderful pink with a lovely purple nose...

#and make no mistake the strong emotion i felt was indeed pining. longing. Yearning. #gazed lovingly at her for a solid ten seconds in the checkout line #i will think of her often and fondly #leaving the diner without her Hurt Me. but i cant afford a new friend rn </3 #still i am sitting by the bright window and playing rain sounds while looking outside in anguish #alas... we were two ships passing in the night.... #absolutely unprompted #ough but really though i have to rest like. my entire arms on my desk #even just typing is making me take minecraft damage #Still I Am Going To Attempt Writing Because Now That The Work Is Done I Am Very Bored #maybe ill write some human au! i have Scene Ideas for it! #or ill continue to workshop lights out #probably work on act three... i cant decide which direction to go in with it #it'll end up in the same place for act four But. the road there... which turn will i make them take.... #depends on how mean im feeling. theres the kind version. the distressed version. and the anguish version #knowing Me i will probably choose the anguish version as the au's canon!

[conivolos]

lil funky gigs thing i wrote!! link to the ao3 :D, and the yt links to the vods i based it off of (kinda), impulse, skizz

------

The drive back from a successful bust, Scar thinks, is one of the best parts of his entire week.

Impulse and Skizz sit in the front of the car, himself and Grian in the back. It's storming somewhere up ahead, but for now, there's light raindrops falling overhead, so quiet you can barely hear it over the softly playing music from the car’s speakers--one of Impulse’s old cds with a weird mix of Blink-182 and instrumental synth pop on it. Mostly Blink-182, though. The shine from the street lights outside illuminates the car in bright light for barely a second, before the night swallows them once more.

Scar watches the raindrops on his window as the desolate night speeds past, eyes occasionally catching on a reflective sign. 

His fingers quietly tap against the car door, poorly imitating the beats from the radio, before a sudden thought pops back into Scar’s head. He perks up a little, sitting up higher in his seat, a grin starting to split his features. Grian’s eyes flick up to meet him, moving from where he was looking out the window.

“Hey, remember what I said about me not dying lately?”

“You literally died just before,” Grian protests, tapping his foot against Scars shin.

“Yeah, but I only died once! So I think it still stands!” Scar says, nodding enthusiastically at everyone and surreptitiously tapping Grian’s foot back with his own.

“Who’s still standing?” Impulse asks, gaze still trained on the road ahead.

“My slurpee suggestion! I’ve survived enough this week that I think I deserve a slurpee for my good work!” he nods enthusiastically again, as if that alone would convince them.

Skizz laughs from the front, glancing at Scar in the rear-view mirror, “You’re not wrong there, bud.”

"Slurpees do sound like a good idea, and it'd be good filling up on gas sooner rather than later..." Impulse murmurs after a moment of consideration.

"Sooo, is that a yes?" Scar asks hopefully.

"Ah, why the heck not."

"Yes!"

“Where are we even going to find a petrol station out here?” Grian pipes up, less asking a question and more of just making a statement.

“I saw a 7-11 when we were driving up here,” Impulse explains, switching lanes (while indicating, mind you, just because they're the only ones on the road doesn't mean he can be reckless).

“Oh, of course. There's a 7-11 down the road from a creepy prison. Makes perfect sense,” Grian despairs, slumping in his seat.

Impulse snickers, turning off into the exit.

“Well of course there is, Grian!” Scar starts and Grian turns to glare at him. Undeterred, Scar continues, “How else would we get our post ghostbustin’ slurpees?”

“We have not busted a single ghost the entire time we’ve been ghost hunting, Scar,” Grian says plainly.

Scar shakes his head, “Slurpees are still an important--nay--vital (vital, Gri) part of ghost hunting!”

Grian rolls his eyes, Impulse and Skizz snicker from the front. “You’re right about that, Scar,” Impulse remarks, and he spots Scar’s responding grin in the rear-view mirror.

“Oh! That reminds me,” Scar starts, leaning forward slightly, “Skizz? You still got a tummy ache?”

Skizz gives a dramatic but ultimately lighthearted groan, “Yeah, but I think this slurpee is gonna fix everything that's ever been wrong with me,” he says, the distant crackle of thunder almost drowning out Impulse’s responding laugh.

“That's a tall ask,” he says, flicking on the indicator once more.

“Hey!!!”

Impulse giggles, and they round a corner. And through the slight fog and rain of just-past-one-am, the bright, flickering 7-Eleven sign blinks into view. 

Scar pumps his fist, this close to bashing it into the car’s ceiling. 

Skizz wheezes and Impulse shoots Scar a concerned look, “Don't hurt yourself, Scar.”

Scar shakes his head, nearly bashing it into the window. If he noticed, Scar doesn't acknowledge it, choosing to carry on talking instead, “You underestimate me, Impulse. I'm far too much of a professional to fall for the car’s evil tricks.”

Grian snorts and Scar turns to him, playfully affronted.

“What? Grian, it’s true--!”

“What’re you talking about? I didn't say anything--”

“Y’know, if we were any further from the stop, I'd be concerned,” Impulse murmurs to Skizz, who snickers in response.

“I know, right?”

“What’s--what’re you talking about?” Scar asks, apparently halting in his bickering.

“Oh, nothing. don't worry about it.” Impulse smiles, turning into the bay.

“We’re only seconds away from sugary heaven, homies!”

“Skizz!”

And Impulse has barely stopped the car before the both of them begin to clamber out of Scar’s door.

“You could’a just--okay.” Impulse blinks then sighs, pushing the button by the door and climbing out himself.

The gas station doors slide open at Scar and Grian’s approach, and their shoes squeak on the scuffed linoleum as they scuttle in.

“Get me one too!” Impulse calls and Skizz spins around from halfway across the bay and shoots him a thumbs-up, smoothly walking backwards into the building. Impulse laughs and shakes his head, making to fill up the car.

Skizz turns around to see Scar immediately making a beeline for the slurpee machine in the back corner, who’s loosely followed by Grian.

As he reaches the machine, Scar tugs the sleeves of his jacket down over his hands and goes to grab one of the bigger cups from the stand. After a quick moment of consideration, flips the tab for a blue looking drink.

“Why are your slurpee cups so big,” Grian complains over the sputtering noises of the slurpee machine, frowning at the rows of cups, “This doesn't make sense.” 

“Whaddya mean?” Skizz asks, sidling up next to him.

“The medium size is as big as my face, Skizz,” he exclaims, “this is too much sugar to be healthy!”

Skizz chuckles and sighs, patting Grian on the shoulder, “Welcome to America, buddy.”

“America sucks, I wanna go back home.”

“Well, too bad! You're stuck with us, G!” Scar chimes in, momentarily pausing with shoving a lid onto his drink.

And while Scar and Grian bicker over whatever in the background, Skizz hesitates over Vanilla Cola and the Traditional Lemonade flavours for Impulse. He stares them down for a second before shrugging and flipping the tab for Vanilla Cola.

“Skizz, which one are you getting?” Grian asks after he finally selects a cup (the smallest option, of course).

“Raspberry and passionfruit, or whatever it's called,” he responds, long since decided, “What about you, G?”

“The only non-sugar one,” he groans, and Skizz snickers.

As they talk, the door to the gas station slides open with a quiet squeak. Impulse walks in, quickly spotting the rest of his team and making his way over, droplets of rain in his hair. “What's happenin’?” he asks, stepping beside Skizz.

“Got you Vanilla Cola,” Skizz explains, thrusting said drink into Impulse’s hands.

“Oooh, thanks.”

“Impulse!” Scar exclaims, interrupting him before he can take a sip, “Go pay for stuff so we can leave again.”

“Need not bother, dippledop!” Skizz says before Impulse can even think about protesting or fishing out his phone. “I’ll pay for us.”

“With what money?” Impulse asks.

“You shut up!!!” 

At that, Skizz digs through his pockets for a moment before he finds his phone. He blinks. The screen’s cracked more than usual and it doesn’t turn on when he presses the button. “It’s fine, it's fine,” he stresses at Impulse’s poorly disguised snort. “I was planning on paying with cash anyway.”

“Who still keeps a wallet on them nowadays? It's 2023 for pete's sake.” Impulse murmurs, only half sarcastic, as Skizz shoves his phone back into his pocket and sets about looking for his wallet.

“Skizz baby, that's who!!”

“...Who’s Pete?” Scar stage whispers, slurpee clutched close to his chest, leaning slightly closer to Grian, who giggles not-so-quietly in turn.

Skizz eventually retrieves his wallet with a celebratory ah-ha, brushing off the lint; some of it landing on his shoes. He opens it with a grin, which it immediately drops off his face. He upturns it, shaking the wallet out; more lint falls out.

Skizz takes a sharp breath and Impulse pats him sympathetically on the shoulder. “Maybe I should just pay for it?” he suggests.

“Yeah! Impulse is the sugar daddy, let him pay for the stuff,” Grian adds.

Skizz huffs, defeated, “You’re all a bunch of jerks…”

“Love you too, Skizz,” Scar says, draping an arm across Skizz's shoulders. “You know, if we were in like a cartoon,” he remarks, “A fly would’ve flown out of your wallet.”

And Skizz has barely enough time to choke on his laughter before Impulse hands his slurpee to him and walks over to pay for the drink, a sheepish look on his face.

They watch from halfway across the store as Impulse talks to the cashier, him laughing nervously as they don't return his smile.

Grian hums, “You know what I'm craving right now?” he says, swirling the straw in his cup and properly turning around to face Scar and Skizz.

“Slurpees?” Scar suggests, taking a sip of his.

“Ice cream?” Skizz asks, shifting the things in his hands so he doesn't drop them.

“Cheese.”

“Cheese,” Skizz echoes.

“Cheese.” Grian nods.

“Why--why cheese?”

Grian shrugs and takes a sip of his slurpee.

Skizz blinks at him.

Scar sighs wistfully, shaking his head, “If only they had a cheese flavour.”

“The hell are you guys talking about?” 

“Oh, Impulse!” Scar gasps, jumping a tad and dramatically clutching at his chest, “You scared the living scars outta me!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Impulse chuckles, taking steps towards the exit and jokingly beckoning the others to follow, “C’mon, we’ve got one more ghost-house to bust-ghost.”

“Oh, please tell me it isn't another prison,” Grian gripes, falling into step beside him.

Impulse laughs, “Not exactly.”

“What? The hike school?” Skizz asks as he and Scar catch up.

“Nooo, no more walking today,” Scar stresses, and Grian nods.

Impulse huffs, unlocking the car doors, “I know, I know. The ghost-house this time is one of those suburban-y ones.”

“One of the ones by the beach?”

“That's the one.”

“Woop!”

#team gigs #gigs phasmo #grian #impulsesv #goodtimeswithscar #skizzleman #coni fics #and yes i had been writing this for a month #also idk whats going on with the links. no clue how to fix it tbh

[anon-blu]

Raindrops C1 (Donnie x GN! reader)

A/N: Hii! New writer here! I just started today makin chapters and so far I’ve made 3 chapters including the prologue for a span of 6 hours, I am crazy shit with writing and reading fics. So I hope ya’ll enjoy the first 3 chapters :3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 1: Raindrops

You woke up late and slept for who knows how many, you rubbed your eyes and sat up, you looked around only to find out that it was already night time. Your stomach churned and started craving some food, you didn’t want to cook at the moment as you still felt fatigued from the long sleep. You changed your clothing from earlier to a fresh one before heading out your room.

You noticed your cat was still with you, asleep on top of your bed, you smile and pat its head gently as you walked out of your bedroom.

You noticed the umbrella from earlier, leaning on the wall next to the coat rack, you picked it up, hoping that you might run into the person from earlier.

You went out of the building soon after, you looked up above and saw that there were many stars out that night, it was quite beautiful honestly and that made you smile a bit. You started walking by the sidewalk, looking around for open shops, there weren’t many people around which made you calm down a bit, you weren’t used to the heavy crowds of New York and it can be overwhelming too.

After a bit of walking, you come across an open shop, a pizza shop to be exact. You entered the place and looked around, it smelled like fresh pizzas and it felt warm and comforting. You walked up to the counter to order some food before sitting down at the seat by the window.

You pulled out your phone and scrolled through your games to play stuff while you wait. Few minutes later, someone comes in the shop, you didn’t bother to look up to see the person while you played games on your phone.

You were then called by your nickname at the counter, saying that your order was ready. You put your phone away and stood up, going up to the counter to take your order. You took your food and looked to your side, only to find out that the person you saw from earlier was standing by you.

“Oh? I didn’t know you would be here.” You blurted out to the person next to you.

The person then looked at your way.

“Oh uh, hello there.” He said.

He was wearing a purple jacket, it seems that he had a purple bandanna on and a black mask to cover his face.

“Thank you for the umbrella earlier.” You said as you then place your food at the counter and pulling out the umbrella from your bag to give it to him.

“You can keep it.” He said. “I have more at home.”

“Oh, okay then.” You can’t help but grin a bit. “Well anyways, I better get going now, my cat is waiting for me.”

“Before I go though, my name is Y/N, you can call me by n/n it’s nice to meet you.” You held out your hand to him.

“Donatello, but you can call me Donnie, it’s nice to meet you too.” He looked at your hand and hesitated a bit before shaking your hand fully.

“See you around then, Donnie.” You said as you smiled at him before taking your food and going out of the shop. As you went out, you let out a deep breath and smiled a bit with a hint of blush on your cheeks. You then started walking home, you let your thoughts wander around again.

You started thinking about how the two of you met, and how bright it was outside when it rained. It looked beautiful that moment, the sounds of the rain, the stillness of your breath, and the sight. Even if it was for a short moment, you felt the world slow down seeing him. Your thoughts stopped as soon as you reached your building.

You suddenly felt like someone was watching you, you looked around to find that no one was there. You shrugged it off before going inside. You went inside your apartment and placed the food on the counter. You then sat down at your couch, before pulling out your phone and checking for recent messages. You put your phone down since there were none.

You’d found your cat coming up to the couch and rubbing itself to your arm, you smiled and patted it again before standing up and getting some of the food you got and putting it on a plate. You opened up your tv and placed the food on the table, you picked up the controller from your side table and started playing games.

#rottmnt x reader #rottmnt #rottmnt donnie x reader #rise donnie #rise donatello #rise donnie x reader #rottmnt x gn reader #x gn reader #gn reader

[daniel306gaming]

¿What if Venom 2007 was in Spider-Man No Way Home?

To: Topher Grace, Tom Holland, Jon Watts, Kevin Feige and Marvel Studios

                                                          Intro

¿What if events went differently in the MCU? ¿What if Venom 2007 was in Spider-Man No Way Home? In today’s fan fiction we’re going to be exploring what would have happened if Topher Grace’s Venom from the Raimiverse was teleported to the MCU by Doctor Strange’s spell. ¿How can this affect the multiverse going forward? This is my own take of events taking inspiration from the 2007-08 One More Day and 2014-15 Spider-Verse story arcs with elements from the 2010 One Moment in Time comic while following the mythology of Venom and Spider-Man and the timeline of the Raimiverse and the MCU respectively. Without wasting anymore time sit back and relax and enjoy this 2 part fan fiction.    

                                                     Prologue

Now that we saw a world where 2018 Venom helped Spider-Man during the final battle with the villains in one universe now it’s time to see another universe with a darker version of Venom from Peter-Two’s universe. I am the Watcher. I am ur guide to these vast new realities. Follow me and pounder the question. What If…

                                                         Part 1

The events of No Way Home were playing out the same as in our universe. Peter Parker has been exposed as Spider-Man which costs MJ, Ned and even Peter himself to not get into MIT prompting Peter to go Doctor Strange for help and casted the spell to erase everyone’s knowledge of Spider-Man and in this universe something else would happen. Meanwhile, in the Raimiverse the events of Spider-Man 3 were playing out the same as well with Peter-Two removing the symbiote out of him and landing on Eddie Brock who became known as Venom. Venom was about to get his revenge on Spider-Man after seeing who he really was and his identity as Peter-Two and our story begins when he looked out the window of the church and heard booming sounds. The symbiote was confused and told Eddie that something was happening. Eddie asked the symbiote what was going on and Venom fell to the ground drained. He looked outside the church saying that it was a bright sunny day and before the weird stuff happened it was raining outside. Eddie knew that something was amiss and decided to go outside as Venom. Venom went outside and changed back into Eddie Brock’s form. He saw people at the church. As the music was playing he bumped into somebody who dropped a bunch of papers and he ran out of the building. Knowing that something was off maybe he was dreaming all this time. Venom spoke to Eddie in his head telling him that he might have ended up into another reality due to the symbiotes having a hive mind meaning that they can sense one another. The symbiote said another symbiote could be around but didn’t mattered. What mattered was to get home taking revenge on Spider-Man. Eddie panicked and questioned the voice in his head telling the voice to stop talking before they were both interrupted by a massive TV screen. Eddie was shocked to see J. Jonah Jameson but it wasn’t his version of him as the one he knew had a set of hair and he looked around seeing people of this world but they were different. They were dressed differently. J. Jonah Jameson started talking about how Peter Parker the wanted criminal known as the murderer Spider-Man. Eddie was shocked to hear the news seeing a photo of Peter Parker on the screen. He knew that the symbiote wasn’t lying and that he jumped into a new universe. Eddie’s grin became bigger as this Peter Parker has been humiliated and broken. He was glad to hear that Peter Parker was facing what he’s been for all this while as a public menace. But now with the powers of the symbiote Eddie thought to himself that maybe he could still take revenge on Peter Parker even if it wasn’t his version of Spider-Man. With one less Spider-Man around it would make his life easier. At the same time the events with Strange and Peter played out the same with Peter telling Strange about MIT and he was kicked out of the Sanctum heading off to find the lady from the MIT. Meanwhile, Venom had been training around the city. Eddie learned how to web swing with the symbiote training until he knew he was ready to face off with Spider-Man of this universe. Peter arrived on the bridge like our universe however this time when he was asking the lady about MIT something else happened as someone else would attack Parker. Peter’s spider sense went off as a black goo went on his hand. He started to panic as people screamed running away. They got out of the cars and they didn’t know where it was coming from but before Parker could think Venom had tracked Peter down to the bridge using the symbiote’s powers. Parker fell backwards putting his Iron-Spider suit on quickly. Venom screamed in Peter’s face. Parker was confused but asked who he was. Venom told Spider-Man that he was Venom. Peter didn’t know what to think but before he could do anything Venom used his webs on the ladies car door pulling it off hitting Parker towards the edge of the road. The train was down below. Peter tried to fight back but any move was countered by Venom. Peter tried to get a fight pattern going but it was too late. Venom kicked him backwards beating the hell out of Spider-Man on the road. Screaming in his face Venom told Parker that he took everything away from him and now he will take his life away. As Venom could give a killing blow to Spider-Man Doc Ock emerged from the bridge destroying everything around him. “What have u done with my machine” Ock yelled at Venom. Thinking it was Spider-Man Ock lunged a metal arm towards Venom but the symbiote dodged the attack. Venom screamed at Ock and Peter who was down for the count tried his best to get up but couldn’t. Venom fought briefly with Ock. Ock put up a good fight before Venom destroyed Doc Ock’s arms. He kicked Doc Ock off of the bridge to an oncoming train. When Venom was about to attack Spider-Man he heard a laugh in the distance. Spider-Man told Ock not to worry. He used his webs to save him in the Nick of time pulling Otto back up from the bridge. Spider-Man webbed him up tying him with webs. Venom turned to his right side to see that it was the Green Goblin of his own world remembering Peter’s memory that Goblin should have been killed. This confused Venom but he knew that he had time to think before they were teleported away. Peter was shocked to see that he was ok. He looked around seeing creatures and people trapped in locked cells. Parker was surprised that he was back in the Sanctum Sanctorum. Peter asked what was going on before Doctor Strange approached Peter explaining that ever since they messed up the spell earlier everyone who knows Peter’s Spider-Man from other universes have been leaking through this world. Peter was shocked to hear it but it was confirmed when he saw 3 people in cells. Venom, Lizard and Doc Ock had been in their cells caught. Venom tried to break out of the cell but to no avail. Doctor Strange ordered Peter to clean this mess up. The more he doesn’t the more villains could wreck havoc across New York. Like in our universe Peter would gain the help of Ned and MJ to stop the villains before things started getting out of hand. Before they left Venom taunted Spider-Man explaining how he knows everything about him and that he took everything away from him. Otto told Venom to shut up before Venom lashed out saying that he was a dead man laughing revealing that Spider-Man also killed him. Venom told Otto that he remembered Spider-Man destroying his machines at the docks and then killed him for good. Ock couldn’t believe it but deep down he knew that it must’ve been true. Venom knew every detail about Peter’s life in his own universe and took advantage of this by manipulating them to join him. Peter said that it wasn’t true before he left in his inside out suit to haunt the following villains. Meanwhile at the Sanctum Sanctorum Venom told Otto that he wanted to kill the spider. “We want to kill the spider. Together we can break out of here”. Otto smirked while Spider-Man dealt with Electro and Sandman. The events with Norman Osborn played out the same as in our universe with him smashing the Goblin mask before walking away learning of Peter Parker in this universe. Otto wanted peace. Spider-Man had taken in Sandman and Electro like in our universe with the help of Ned and MJ. Strange was glad that most of the villains have been dealt with but he still needed to find the one that was on the glider at the bridge. This time before Otto could explain to Peter Venom told Peter that the man he seeks was one that he murdered in cold blood. He told Peter that he could try and haunt down the ghost telling everyone in the room that Spider-Man had killed Green Goblin with his glider manipulating the story again. Venom said that if everyone wants to live they need to join him and kill Spider-Man to reclaim what they once lost.

                                                   Ultimate finale

Otto agreed but never knew that Peter was so evil. Lizard, Electro and Sandman were on the fence about joining Venom especially Sandman. He explained to everyone in the room how Venom was a liar and that he lied to him when he tried to team up to take down Spider-Man. Sandman said that he was a hero and that Otto died because he drowned and that the Goblin was killed by his own glider. Venom became intrigued by this asking Flint what happened to him. Flint told Venom the future on how Spider-Man killed him with the pumpkin bomb. Venom was shell-shocked knowing that this was the Flint of his world but the symbiote told him that it must have been the future. The villains didn’t believe Sandman and Venom told Flint that he lied about everything. As the villains were arguing about themselves Peter decided to leave and went to seek Norman Osborn who he saw at Feast. As Peter got Norman he told him he was sorry as Strange locked him in a cell. With all the villains captured Doctor Strange said that Peter kills them in each of their universes and they’re not being able to accept this. Peter wanted to help the villains. He told Strange that there needed to be another way as Spider-Man isn’t a killer. Venom taunted Spider-Man again and said to him that if he didn’t help them out then he would continue being a cold-blooded killer. Doctor Strange yelled for Peter not to do this as he was being manipulated. Before Strange could react a web took the magic box before Strange fought with Spider-Man in the Sanctum Sanctorum. Parker dodged attacks from Doctor Strange who told him that he lost his mind and that he can’t be trusted anymore. This time Doctor Strange didn’t fight him in the Mirror Dimension but rather in the Sanctum. Using magic and spells to defeat Spider-Man wasn’t working. Norman and Otto yelled for Peter to save them before putting the pressure on Peter. Parker dodged a spell that broke parts of the ceiling on Doctor Strange knocking him out cold. Peter ran to his aid to see if he was okay before the spell on the cells had broken. Parker told the villains that he could cure them if they gave him a chance but they didn’t listen as Venom grabbed the box from Peter while Sandman, Lizard and Electro ran away. Norman smirked begging for help. Spider-Man tried to help him before Norman punched him in the face. Parker flew across the room and everyone stopped. As Electro, Lizard and Sandman were about to leave the Sanctum Sanctorum Green Goblin told them that they have gifts and that they don’t need to be cured of Spider-Man. Venom agreed telling everyone how Spider-Man murdered everyone and that if they can kill him they can rewrite history. Green Goblin smashed Peter’s face smashing it through the wall before dragging his body towards the group while Venom beat down on him with Ock. Green Goblin told the rest to go to Feast where they could upgrade their suits and equipment. While Parker is broken by the villains he made a last-ditch effort to phone Ned and MJ about the situation telling them that the villains have escaped and that they’re coming for Aunt May. Peter tried phoning Aunt May multiple times but she didn’t pick up the phone. Parker became enraged. He looked at Doctor Strange’s body where he found a sling ring. Knowing this would help him maybe he could defeat the villains. Peter decided to take it and he met up with Ned and MJ where they could help him if they needed him. Peter met with them and they all hugged on a building rooftop. They asked how he could do it alone. Peter put his head down but told them that they need him to use it and ask for him. Strange explained this earlier but it would help him just in case he doesn’t come back. They cried before Peter left them with one last group hug. Peter swung to the Feast building where he stood in shock. A black web and letters told Spider-Man that today he would die. Parker heard screaming as Peter ran towards the top of the building before he could see that Electro had Tony’s technology, Otto had new arms and Green Goblin was hovering over all of them. Doc Ock had Aunt May with his new arms. Venom told him that if he comes any closer than his Aunt May would die. Venom then laughed saying that it was the Green Goblin who revealed her location and that this would be his weakness because in his universe Uncle Ben was his weakness. Knowing that this needed to end now. Peter gave a big breath before screaming at the villains. He used his webs to dodge Venom before Electro charged up and Spider-Man dodged it and the bolt hit Venom’s back. As this happened Spider-Man kicked Lizard in the face using his webs to attack the Goblin’s glider kicking Otto in the head knocking him out temporarily. Aunt May fell to the ground before Peter grabbed him. As he grabbed her Sandman told Parker that he didn’t want to die so he must fight him knocking him back. Parker lost his grip on Aunt May before Venom grabbed her with the web. Venom had May where May begged for her life before Green Goblin took her from Venom hovering over Parker. Parker was outmatched 6 to 1. Anything he tried to do wasn’t working. Green Goblin told Peter that only fools are heroes and that it only takes one person to ruin everything. Peter lunged at Goblin before Venom used the symbiote holding him down. Venom told Parker that Goblin was going to kill Aunt May in front of him so that he can experience what they felt when they were killed by him. Green Goblin took out a blade from his wrist and was ready to kill her before he smiled and dropped her. Parker screamed “MAY” as she fell down the building ripping the symbiote tendrils. Peter almost died for Aunt May but it was already too late. Peter had Aunt May in his hands. Aunt May told Peter that he was good and was only trying to do good. She said that “With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility” before dying in Peter’s arms. Peter screamed and the Bugle came on time reporting on the incident. Green Goblin flew behind Peter where he choked him punching Spider-Man in the face 3 times before throwing him down where Venom used the symbiote to knock him back. Sandman punched Spider-Man and Lizard jumped on him kicking him towards Electro where he kept shocking Peter. Green Goblin walked towards Spider-Man and was ready to kill him before Venom used the symbiote to grab Goblin’s knife before stabbing it into Peter. Venom picked up Peter’s body and threw him away. Venom said that it was done as Green Goblin took a bomb throwing it. As the villains left Feast the building blew up and came down on Spider-Man. MJ and Ned had been worried about Parker so they’ve decided to use the sling ring asking for Peter Parker. Peter from another world came out of the portal and explained how he was Spider-Man from another universe which that would be Andrew Garfield alias Peter-Three. Peter was shocked to see them. He was confused but knew that he was sent to another reality. MJ and Ned asked for his help as they haven’t heard from their Peter. They saw in the news that Feast had been obliterated. They tried to get Peter back but another Peter Parker came from the portal. It was none other than Tobey Maguire alias Peter-Two. He explained how he was sent here but he didn’t know why. Because of this he knew that he needed to help him. As Peter-Two and Three saw each other they briefly fought before knowing they were on the same side. They immediately suited up in this universe as all the villains have been on the loose and not cured. Peter-Two and Three swung to Feast only to find everything broken but someone was standing there. They approached the man who was none other than Doctor Strange himself who was shocked to see 2 other Spider-Men. Strange said how he was too late to save the kid. If only he had listened then maybe none of this would have happened. The 2 Spider-Men lifted debris but couldn’t find anything. Peter-Two yelled and he saw an arm where both Parkers started lifting him. They got Peter-Prime out of the debris but he was hurt badly. Peter was crying but he saw MJ and Ned. They ran to him where they hugged Peter. Peter slowly got up as he looked to see Doctor Strange and 2 other Spider-Men. Peter was destroyed as his Aunt May was killed by the villains who he originally wanted to help cure and send them back. Peter told the other 2 Spider-Men that he doesn’t care anymore about what happens but he said that he was going to put an end to this. Peter vowed that he was going to kill every last one of them. “There isn’t much time left to stop them” Doctor Strange said. They had the box and if they use it they could destroy the multiverse. The villains knew that the box needed to be destroyed. If Strange got it they would be sent back to their OG spots before they were killed. Venom told them that if they destroyed the box then they can’t be sent back home. Green Goblin took the box laughing before blowing it up with a pumpkin bomb on the Statue of Liberty. The 3 Spider-Men saw the explosion knowing that they needed to stop this right now. Strange saw the multiverse started to break and knew that he had to stop this. Peter-Prime asked to go with them as this was his fight. The 2 Peters looked at each other and agreed giving their hands out to him before saying goodbye to MJ and Ned. The universe has changed as they aren’t curing the villains but putting them away for good this time. As the villains looked to see the multiverse break they were confused on what was going on before they were met with 3 Spider-Men. Peter-Two couldn’t believe his eyes. He saw Doc Ock, Green Goblin, Sandman and Venom altogether. Things were about to get personal. Venom looked at one of the Spider-Men but made a massive scream telling Parker that now he gets his revenge on his own Spider-Man. Venom revealed his face to the 3 Spider-Men. Peter-Two was shocked that Eddie has returned. Peter-Two had unfinished business with Venom after the death of Harry Osborn in his universe. Peter-Three saw Electro and the Lizard trying to calm them down before the battle began. Doctor Strange began to create the spell trying to fix the multiverse before it was doomed. Peter-Two and Venom locked into a brawl and Peter-Prime attacked Green Goblin. Peter-Three started fighting Electro and the Lizard. The fight was insane as both sides wanted to win. Peter-Two yelled that Venom’s weakness was loud noises. Peter decided to take revenge. He kicked Green Goblin off of his glider making him fall to his death before Peter-Three knew that he couldn’t let him die before saving the Goblin. He got into a heated battle down below. Norman stabbed Peter-Three with a knife down below as Peter-Three went to hand-to-hand combat knocking out Green Goblin. Venom webbed up Peter-Two. Peter-Two had flashbacks of this before he was webbed up and saw his friend die. He couldn’t let that happen again to Peter-Prime. With all his might he tried his best to break free.  Peter fought with Venom on top of the Statue of Liberty. Venom gained the upper hand on Peter who was already weakened and clawed his face before summoning a symbiote knife. Eddie smiled before stabbing it into Peter-Prime kicking him to the ground. Otto looked shocked as Peter-Prime was stabbed. Venom umasked Peter-Two throwing his mask away explaining how all he wanted was sweet revenge and now he can get it on 3 Peters. Ock stood still and said “Peter”. He knew that it was his Peter. Parker told Otto that Venom was manipulating him to fight him. Otto knew that something was amiss and that maybe Peter had been right all along. Venom said that he enjoyed his revenge before summoning the blade and was ready to kill him before Ock’s arms wrapped around Venom. Venom screamed using the symbiote to break free before Maguire’s Spider-Man screamed throwing Venom off of the Statue of Liberty. Venom hit hard down below trying to crawl to his feet. Peter-Two punched Venom again and again as Peter-Three was dishing out blows to the Green Goblin. Sandman helped Otto after realizing that he’s been tricked. They stopped the Lizard and Electro. Peter-Two and Three were hit back by the symbiote and the symbiote started getting bigger. Peter-Prime looked down below before knowing that they needed help. Otto extended a hand out to him. Peter-Prime got back up and thanked him before jumping all the way down. Peter-Two and Three along with Green Goblin had been knocked out by Venom who had turned into a completely new monster. Venom screamed saying that they will all die before Peter-Prime stood in front of him. Venom laughed and said that it was too late for him. Peter screamed running towards Venom lunging at him as the other 2 Peters were down for the count. They could only watch down below. Peter punched Venom again and again before some of the Venom symbiote had gotten onto him. Peter-Two slowly got up and told Peter-Prime not to take the symbiote. The power of the symbiote was tempting. Then Peter-Prime remembered what Aunt May told him as Peter kept getting the symbiote on him punching Venom. He started ripping the tendrils off of him. Venom laid on the ground defeated. Peter-Two helped Peter-Three up before they walked towards Venom who was unconscious. Peter-Two said that he did good and didn’t give in to his anger. A voice can be heard. “Can Spider-Man come out to play”. Green Goblin has crawled his way back up laughing. He took a pumpkin bomb telling the heroes that he would all be going with him to hell. As he detonated the bomb the 3 Spider-Men’s spider sense went off as Venom tried to lunge behind them. Peter-Two took one of the bombs throwing it at Venom before Peter-Prime and Three threw the other at Green Goblin. The bombs exploded defeating Green Goblin and Venom for good. Green Goblin tried to crawl before Peter-Two knocked him out. The Venom symbiote had been destroyed in the process. Eddie Brock was down for the count. Peter might have cured him in the end and Strange told the 3 Spider-Men that he was sending everyone home and forgetting that Peter Parker is Spider-Man. Parker agreed as the 3 hugged one last time before Peter hugged MJ and Ned one last time. Venom and the Sinister 6 had been defeated. Peter sent everyone back and Strange screamed performing the spell erasing everyone from knowing that Peter was Spider-Man. Everybody was sent back and everything was fixed. The multiverse hadn’t been destroyed. Peter came home missing May but knew that she would be proud of him. At the same time Eddie in the Raimiverse wouldn’t get the symbiote in Spider-Man 3 leading to him never attacking Peter. Harry would live as Peter would never fight Venom or no other Venom after he ripped the symbiote off him. In the MCU Tom Hardy’s Venom was sent back and Peter woke up after a long day only to find himself dangling near a tall building. He looked in the mirror seeing that his whole suit was black. He knew that the Venom symbiote might not have fully left the Stark suit and Peter smiled as he had full power…

                                                       THE END!

And that is going to be it for what if Venom 2007 was in Spider-Man No Way Home. Now the ending of this story could indeed lead into a possible confrontation between Tom Hardy and Holland’s Venom and Spider-Man with the symbiote now in his suit like at the end of this fan fiction. At the time I’m writing this I wanna ask you’ll this. ¿Are you’ll really excited for Phase 5 and 6 especially Avengers the Kang Dynasty and Secret Wars cause I sure am and let’s hope that Feige announces the new Spider-Man trilogy at D23 because that would be insane. Trust me that when these movies come out these fan fictions are going to explode because even if the multiverse gets destroyed there will still be other universes to explore and I can’t wait for that because I’ll be hard at work throwing all those fan fictions for u guys to enjoy. I will start to divide my fan fictions making several collections like the Raimiverse, Webbverse, Star Wars, comics, video games, DC Universe, Nolanverse, DCEU, Marvel Universe, X-Men, Avengers 2000 and in terms of the MCU the Infinity Saga and now introducing the Multiverse Saga fan fictions so things are going to be heating up here and I can’t wait for you’ll to see the next fan fictions so be on the lookout for all this and more what ifs coming soon. Now it’s a good time to be a Marvel/DC and Star Wars fan. Take care guys and have a fantastic day. Peace out!

#marvel studios #multiverse saga

[anonymoustome]

I stand in my childhood bedroom, gazing at my floral comforter as memories flood back to me. The good and the bad. Slowly, I make my way to the large window facing the street, where a sad oak tree stands in the rain. I always loved that oak tree, despite others' indifference. The rain cascades down the street, heading for the storm drain, with dark clouds blocking the sun. It's all so beautiful, I think to myself.

Suddenly, I hear small footsteps on the linoleum floor, causing my heart to race with fear. The footsteps slow, and a young girl appears in the doorway. I can't bear to look at her, knowing what will happen. She stands there, smiling innocently, her small frame dwarfed by the door. She skips over to my bed and sits swinging her feet above the floor. Her bright blue eyes meet mine, oblivious to the fear in my expression.

I watch as she plays with her blonde curly hair and kicks her feet, waiting for what comes next. Her shoes make a squeaky sound as she moves, reminding me of the typical white dress shoes every young girl wears at Easter. I wince at the sight of her thin bangs, a reminder of innocence lost.

As she gazes at me, I can't help but be captivated by her youth and naivety. She smooths out her white lace dress, and I kneel to her level. "Juliet, we need to leave," I whisper urgently. She looks at me, unsure of who I am, and I feel tears welling up.

"Please, trust me. I promise to protect you, but we must go now." I extend my hand, and after a moment of hesitation, she places her hand in mine. A wave of relief washes over me as we run out of the room and down the hall. All we need to do is escape through the front door and then we will be safe.

I look back to make sure she is still behind me, but she isn't. How did I not feel her hand slip out of mine? How could I have been so careless as to not pick her up and carry her? I yell her name, "Juliet... Juliet," growing frantic. I feel a pain in my chest, and then suddenly, I hear her. I step outside the front door to see a circle of people surrounding her near the oak tree. She is screaming at me to help, but I can't reach her. It's as if they are brick walls that cannot be moved.

She is curled up in a ball, holding her knees to her chest, as she screams and cries. I try my best to reach her, but I feel helpless. They are throwing harsh and cruel words at her. The woman claiming to be her mother calls her a lying whore, while the man claiming to be her father belittles her for crying. Another person, who thinks they are a better mother than her own, dismisses her worth. The hurtful words continue to pile on, with accusations of being a narcissist, a liar, a whore, dramatic, and more.

These words are surrounding her, and I can feel her slipping away. I am fading as well because I see her. I see her true self, and realize that she is me, and I am her. I am in the midst of a circle of people who claim to love me, yet they are treating me cruelly. They are hurting me, and I can't understand why they can't see the harm they are causing. I am being attacked repeatedly, bleeding profusely with no end in sight. I look up to see their emotionless faces staring back at me. I plead for help, begging someone to save me, but they do nothing.

The blood keeps flowing from me, staining my once pretty white dress a dark red. I struggle to breathe as my lungs fill with fluid, rendering me unable to speak. Tears stream down my face as I watch myself being left to die. I fade into darkness, resigning myself to my fate. Closing my eyes, I pray for the pain to end, only to suddenly wake up with a jolt. It was just a nightmare, but it felt all too real.

I see the picture of a five-year-old girl in a white dress, sitting in her dad's lap

on my nightstand. I gently run my thumb across the glass frame, tears streaming down my face. I couldn't save her, but I shouldn't have had to. "Juliet, are you okay?" my concerned husband asks. I quickly wipe away the tears and reply, "Yeah, just a nightmare," even though it wasn't just a nightmare. This actually happened. That little girl was brutally murdered years ago, suffering through a slow and agonizing end. Each hurtful word spoken to her was like a deep cut that never healed. She bled out slowly until I emerged, a shell of a person who no longer cries shares feelings, or lets anyone get close enough to hurt her. All I have left is anger and hate buried beneath a facade of fake smiles and jokes that make others laugh.

I set the picture down and close my eyes, envisioning the carefree laughter of that five-year-old girl. I can imagine the bright future she could have had if only someone had protected her, me.

-Anonymous101

#trauma #mental health #writers on tumblr #writing

[the-bau-quinjet]

Plum Cobbler

Steve x Barnes!reader, Bucky x platonic!reader

Summary: What happens when Steve confronts the woman who's been sitting outside the compound every Saturday for a month?

Warnings: mentions parental death, some cursing

Word Count: 6315

a/n: This really took on a mind of its own. I was going to make it a series, but I feel like this is the whole story.

Masterlist

Nervous didn't even begin to describe how you were feeling. Sitting in your car, just outside of the entrance gate to the Avenger's compound was never somewhere you thought you'd be. Not until two months ago, when you found your grandmas old scrapbooks.

Of course, you don't know how to get inside. Honestly, you should have seen this coming. Why would just anyone be able to walk up to their door?

"Who are you?" The sudden question startled you, causing you to jump and hit your head on the roof of your car. You turned to look at the source of the voice, shrinking under her watchful gaze.

The one and only Natasha Romanoff was standing outside your car, glaring at you as if she was ready to drop everything to take you out.

"Oh, um. My name is Y/N L/N. I just wanted to talk to Bucky..." Her glare only grew stronger as you revealed why you were there.

"Barnes doesn't talk to strangers." Before you could explain why, she was gone. You watched her walk into the compound until she wasn't in your view anymore.

"Well, that went horribly." You mumbled to yourself. Now what? Should you just sit there until someone else comes out? Will anyone come out?

-

"So who is she?" Clint asked as soon as Nat got back inside.

"Why is she here?" Sam added on.

"Said her name is Y/N L/N, and she wants to talk to Bucky." Nat rolled her eyes.

"Friday, run a background check on F/N L/N." Tony asked of the AI. "What? You can never be too careful, and people shouldn't know how to get here." He explained given the questioning looks from the rest of the group.

"Y/N L/N, 27, daughter of the deceased Kathleen and Grant L/N. She owns a bookstore in Brooklyn, passed down through her family. No criminal record." Friday responded quickly.

"Sounds normal enough, probably a fan?" Tony suggested, looking around the room.

"A persistent one. She's been here for hours." Steve looked out the window, still seeing your car just outside the gate. "How did she find the entrance?"

Everyone shared similar looks, unsure how a seemingly normal civilian found the gate.

"Excellent question, Capsicle. Friday, got any ideas?" Tony, as usual, turned to the AI for answers.

"Based on GPS data from her car, she drove around upstate New York for eight hours every Saturday for the last 6 weeks until she came across the side road leading to the compound."

"Either she's really good at looking normal, or she's just normal." Nat added on, still slightly suspicious.

"Well, she just left. I guess we're not getting any answers today." Steve said from his position still looking out the window.

-

You came back every Saturday for a month. You didn't know if anything would come of it, but you'd be damned if you didn't try. After your parent's deaths, you thought you had no family left. Finding out you were related to Bucky gave you a lifeline. Something to cling to when you felt alone.

So far, nobody else had come to talk to you. You didn't even know if Bucky knew you were there for him.

The fifth Saturday, you pulled your car up to the gate at 9 am, sticking to your makeshift schedule of waiting outside for the entire day. They had to at least be curious as to why you kept coming back.

Unfortunately for you, the weather upstate today was not the same as the weather in Brooklyn.

Around 10:30, it started to rain. Just a sprinkling, nothing you couldn't handle.

You listened to music, read, ate the lunch you packed, played games on your phone, anything to pass the time. You weren't going to force your way inside, but you were definitely going to show that you were interested.

Typically, you would leave at 5:30. It gave you enough time to drive home and heat up dinner, plus you had to check in on your cat.

Today, however, was a different story. Around 5:15, it started pouring. Sheets of water were coming down around you, completely cutting off any visibility through the windshield.

You figured you'd just wait out the rain, but when it didn't let up by 6, you were getting nervous.

-

"She's still here." Steve walked into the kitchen, announcing his news to the room.

"I'm not surprised. It's not exactly peak driving conditions out there." Sam easily responded, glancing out the window.

"Aren't you the least bit curious as to why?" Steve asked again, pushing the same conversation as always.

Nearly everyone in the room rolled their eyes, sick of repeating the same things.

"Look, we figured if we ignored her, she'd eventually stop. Clearly, that might not be working. If you're so curious, feel free to go ask her." Tony gave in, eager to move on from the discussion of you.

Steve contemplated his choices for all of 2 seconds before grabbing an umbrella and walking down the driveway.

-

You had your head leaned back against the headrest, eyes closed, listening to the rain. Of course you would get stuck here. Why didn't you ever check the weather?

You shrieked when a knock sounded on your passenger side window, not having expected anyone, especially in the rain.

Mr. America himself pointed to the door, gesturing for you to unlock it. You sat up quickly, rushing to hit the unlock button.

He quickly opened the door, shutting his umbrella and lowering himself into the small car.

You were utterly speechless. After your brief encounter with Natasha, you didn't really expect anyone to come talk to you.

Sure, you came back every week, but it was more so to fill the lonely hours you would have normally spent with your parents at the bookstore.

You had other employees to run the shop on Saturdays, allowing you to come here instead.

"Why are you here?" He sounded more curious than anything. Clearly he didn't perceive you as a threat, which was good because you had zero fighting experience.

"To talk to Bucky." Your voice was quiet, unsure how much you should share.

"I know that. Why?" He had fully turned in his seat to look at you, his large frame filling nearly the entire car.

"Well, I found something a few months ago that I thought he should know." You stuttered through your response, mildly intimidated by the man in front of you.

"And that something is?" He questioned further, genuinely curious as to what you want to tell his best friend.

You hesitated, eyes flitting around the car, looking at anything but him. He sighed and ran his hand through his hair before speaking again.

"Look, if you ever want to actually talk to him, you should tell me. Buck's been through hell, he won't just talk to anyone. Especially if he has no reason to."

During your conversation, the rain finally let up. You decided to take that as a sign.

"Can I show you something?" You finally looked him in the eye, nearly forgetting why you were even here at the sight of his bright blue eyes.

"Is it the reason you've been out here every Saturday for over a month?" He joked with you, helping to calm your nerves.

You nodded in response, unsure if you could even speak while still looking into his eyes.

"Then please."

You tore your eyes from his face, throwing the car into reverse and backing out of the spot you've claimed as your own. You turned around, heading back to your apartment in Brooklyn.

"Wha- where are we going?" He's clearly surprised by your actions, but he doesn't seem worried.

"I'm going to show you what I found, and hopefully you'll let me talk to Bucky." You paused for a minute, thinking. "Although, really I guess it should be his choice. Maybe you can just give him a message for me, and if he doesn't want to talk I'll leave you all alone."

The idea of never getting to know Bucky, you're only remaining family, hurts, but it's got to be his decision.

Steve just nods in response, still slightly wary of your reasons for wanting to talk to Bucky.

When you're a few minutes away from your apartment, you decide to give him some context.

"You probably already know a lot about me, but let me explain a few things." He silently nods, encouraging you to continue.

"My parents died three and a half months ago." You immediately felt like crying, but did your best to hold it in. Of course, Steve didn't miss the break in your voice. "It was a car accident. The weather was bad. They lost control of the car. They were both pronounced dead on the scene." You parked the car, turning slightly to look at him.

"They were the only family I've ever had, and the were both just gone." You turned and opened the car door, taking a moment to wipe the tears from your eyes. You gestured for him to follow you, locking the car and heading inside your apartment building.

"We were really close. I spent every Saturday at the bookstore with them." You wiped the tears again as the elevator doors closed.

You didn't chance looking at Steve, knowing you would break down at the look of pity.

"I had to go through the stuff at their house. You know, decide what to bring here, what to put in storage, what to get rid of. I found some old scrapbooks, I think from my great grandma."

You lead him into your apartment, locking the door and immediately heading to the kitchen to feed your cat. After you set down the food, you moved to the couch. You had the scrapbooks on the coffee table, having taken every opportunity to look through them.

"I never knew her. My parents didn't talk about her either, I'm not sure if they knew who she was. Her name was Rebecca." You waited a beat, to see if he would understand. When he remained quiet, you handed him one of the books, open to a page with a picture of Steve, Bucky, and Rebecca. "Rebecca Barnes."

You waited again, letting the information sink in for him. After a few minutes he smiled.

"I remember this day." He looked at you, a wide smile on his face. "It was a few days before Bucky was enrolled. We had a picnic." He continued to reminisce, looking through the other pictures in the scrapbook.

"Maybe it's selfish, maybe he won't want to know me, but when I found out I had more family, I wanted to find him." Again, tears pooled in your eyes. "I, I just don't want to be alone."

Steve's smile faltered as he realized what you've been going through, and how you've been doing it alone.

"Hey, I'm sure he'll want to talk to you." He reached out to place a hand on your arm, trying to comfort you.

"Really?" Your eyes were still watery, but a small smile grew on your face.

"I think so. Bucky was really close with his sister when we were young." This time, Steve's eyes grew watery, memories of his youth playing through his mind.

You couldn't take the sight of him being sad, so you pulled him into a hug. He came willingly, letting you bury your face in his chest. He lowered his head so it was overtop of yours, relishing in the comfort of your hug.

You pulled away a few minutes later, not wanting to overstep, but the feeling of his arms around your waist didn't let you go far.

"Thank you for coming out to my car." You laughed, trying to lighten the mood. His face was so close to yours, you could make out the individual shades of blue in his eyes.

"Thank you for sharing your story with me." He whispered back, not wanting to break the moment.

You're not sure how long you would've stayed like that, but a loud crack of thunder jolted you apart.

"What the-" You mumbled, walking over to the window to look outside. Steve followed close behind you, also curious about the weather.

It was now pouring, lightning and thunder cracking overhead.

"I guess the storm followed us to Brooklyn." He joked, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I guess so." You looked at the clock, taking in the late hour.

Steve must've followed your line of sight, because he spoke up. "It's getting late, I should probably go."

You immediately shook your head, your fear of travelling in bad weather shining through. "I can't let you leave when it's like this. It's not safe. You, um, you can stay here tonight. You can sleep in my room. I'll sleep on the couch." You grew more confident as you kept talking.

"I couldn't impose like that." Steve shook his head, not wanting to make you uncomfortable.

"Steve, it's not safe to travel when it's raining like that. I would never forgive myself if something happened to you." Your voice grew tighter, trying not to flashback to the day your parents died.

Steve seemed to realize why you were so worried about the weather, ultimately deciding to agree to stay so you wouldn't worry about him.

"Okay, okay. I'll stay here, but you sleep in your bed. I'll be fine on the couch." He refused your offer, not wanting to force you to spend a night on the couch.

"First of all, thank you. Second of all, you are sleeping in the bed. You're like two feet taller than me." You exaggerated your height difference, but you were trying to make a point. "You won't even be able to lay down on the couch. I take naps here all the time, it's super comfortable." You argued back, unwilling to allow Captain America himself sleep on your tiny ass couch.

"You know, I should've expected you to be this stubborn. You spent five weeks waiting outside the compound with no contact. Plus you're related to Bucky" He laughed to himself, slightly shaking his head. "Fine, I'll sleep in the bed."

You smiled victoriously, jumping up from the couch. "Yay! Do you need anything? I have spare toothbrushes under the sink, and I can probably find you some clothes to sleep in. There's some snacks in the kitchen if you get hungry. Oh! And Carrot might try to lay in the bed with you, but I'll try to keep her out here." You rambled, trying to make sure he was comfortable.

"Carrot?" He smiled at your rambling, finding it adorable.

"Yes! Carrot is my cat. She's a cuddler, so consider yourself warned." You paused, eyes growing wide. "You're not allergic to cats are you? I think there's probably cat fur all over my room."

He laughed again. "No, I don't think the super soldier serum left any room for allergies." He quipped.

You smacked a hand to your forehead. "Duh! Anyway, do you need anything?" You asked again, trying to calm your beating heart.

"Some clothes would be great, thank you." The way he smiled at you did nothing to soothe your nerves.

"Okay." You breathed out, finally taking a deep breath. "I'll go grab some, the bathroom is right here if you need it." You pointed it out on your way to your room. "I'm just gonna get changed real quick, and then I'll be back with your clothes."

He nodded again, watching as you turned and walked into what must be your room.

You quickly changed into a t-shirt and sleep shorts. It took a few minutes of searching through boxes, but eventually you found an old pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt for Steve to sleep in.

You made your way out of the bedroom, handing him the clothes.

"Here ya go. Like I said, there are extra toothbrushes under the sink in the bathroom, and don't hesitate to grab anything you need from the kitchen."

He eyed the clothes in his hands, wondering where they came from, but not wanting to ask.

Luckily for him, you could tell what he was wondering. "They were my dad's." A sad smile graced your face. "I- I sleep in them sometimes when I really wish I could talk to him."

"Thank you." Steve turned to go to bed, but changed his mind last minute. He set the clothes down on the couch, pulling you into another hug. "You know, I can tell your related to Buck. He always looks out for people too."

You blushed at the compliment, grateful he couldn't see your face. "Thank you, that really means a lot." You stayed like that until Steve pulled back to talk to you again.

"I can take you back to the compound tomorrow, if you want. Maybe introduce you to Bucky."

"Really?! You don't want to talk to him first? Or double check anything I told you?" You were shocked at how willing he was to introduce you to Bucky.

"I trust you. Plus, I think you should be the one to tell him." Steve didn't say it out loud, but he also thought you and Bucky would be good for each other.

Bucky had Steve to connect his past and present, but another person for him to rely on wouldn't hurt. And you clearly were looking for a family connection.

"I would love to. Thank you!" You hugged him again, although quicker this time. You jumped back, excited to collect everything you wanted to show him. "I have to find all the scrapbooks to show him!"

When you turned to start collecting things, Steve put a hand on your shoulder, essentially preventing you from moving.

"Why don't we get everything together in the morning? It's getting late and you should get some sleep." He understood how emotionally and physically draining it could be to relive a loss like yours.

"You're right. I should sleep." You tried to slow your mind down, but the prospect of meeting Bucky tomorrow filled you with a mix of excitement and nerves. You gathered your extra blankets and pillows, setting up a bed for yourself on the couch while he went into the bathroom.

You were snuggled in bed, ready to sleep when he came back out.

"Goodnight, Steve."

His heart contracted at how adorable you looked buried in blankets on the couch, but he did his best to ignore it. He'd only just met you after all.

"Goodnight, Y/N."

-

The next morning Steve woke up at 5, per usual. He didn't want to wake you up though, so, despite his natural tendencies to run 10 miles every Sunday morning, he stayed in bed.

That is, until he heard you shuffling around the apartment.

He poked his head out of the room first, trying to verify that you were indeed awake. When he saw you in the kitchen, he fully emerged intent on helping you with whatever you were doing.

"Good morning, you're an early riser?" His question was completely ignored. Granted you couldn't see him yet, but he didn't know why you would be ignoring him.

He made his way closer to you, tapping you on the shoulder to try and get you to interact with him.

You, in a mixture of surprise and fear, turned and threw an egg at him.

He looked at you in shock, while you stared in horror at what you had just done.

You took headphones out of your ears, explaining why you hadn't heard his question.

"Oh my god! I'm so sorry!" You reached toward him with a dish towel, trying to wipe the egg off his (your dad's) shirt. "You just surprised me! I can get you another shirt!"

"It's fine, don't worry-" You ran out of the room anyway, grabbing another shirt of your dad's from the box in your room.

He couldn't help but laugh, oddly relieved that you weren't ignoring him.

When you reentered the kitchen, a shirtless Steve Rogers was washing your dad's shirt in the sink. You froze, taking in the sight of the man before you.

When he turned back around, your eyes took on a mind of their own, soaking in his toned chest and arms. You cleared your throat, shaking yourself out of your stupor to hand him the other shirt.

"Thanks." He smirked, but still blushed slightly before he put it on, ringing out the other shirt before handing it to you. "I didn't want the egg to stick to it since it was your dads, so i rinsed it off..." he trailed off, unsure if it was the right thing to say.

"That's really sweet, thank you. Especially because it was my fault there was even egg on it in the first place." You laughed, trying not to blush with embarrassment.

"Don't worry about it, really. I shouldn't have snuck up on you." He laughed as well, clearing any lingering tension. He took a look around the kitchen, taking in just how much stuff you had out.

"What are you making?" He smiled when you blushed again.

"Oh, I was making plum cobbler... I just, I read online that Bucky likes plums, so I thought I would bring him a cobbler." You blushed again, embarrassed by the admission.

"He does." Steve smiled, completely enamoured with your personality. "Did you want some help?"

"Actually, the cobblers are in the oven already. I was going to make breakfast next, though, so you can help with that." You smiled, noting how easy it was to spend time with him.

"Cobblers? I know Bucky's a super soldier, but one would have been plenty." He joked with you, moving to help scramble some eggs.

"Well, yeah. One is for him, but then I thought the other Avengers might be there and I didn't want to not have enough so I made three."

"You're too cute." The words slipped out before he could even think about what he was saying.

You blushed again, a frequent occurrence it seems when you're with Steve.

You uttered a quick thanks, trying to change the subject. "Do you always get up this early?"

He chuckled again. "Yeah, typically I don't need much sleep. I usually run in the mornings, try to clear my head."

The two of you fell into easy conversation, moving around each other effortlessly to make eggs, sausage, toast, and smoothies for breakfast.

When you finished eating, you collected the scrapbooks Bucky might want to see. You added his mom's wedding ring, the one your mom wore as well, to the box.

"What's that?" Steve pointed to the box, unsure if his assumption was correct.

You pulled out two scrapbooks, pointing to the near identical pictures of Bucky's mom and your mom after having been proposed to.

"My mom always told me her engagement ring was a family heirloom. I think it was his mom's ring too. I thought he might like to have it. As something to remember her by, ya know?"

You got teary eyed again. Thinking about how much he must miss his family combined with how much you miss your own parents was too much to handle.

You finished gathering everything, putting it all in a box to make for easier transportation. You took the cobblers out of the oven, packing them as well.

With a deep breath, you followed Steve back out to your car, ready to talk to Bucky.

-

"Where the hell is Steve?" Bucky nearly stormed into the kitchen.

"Whoa, calm down tinman. What's up?" Sam replied casually, pouring cereal into a bowl.

"Where is Steve? I was supposed to run with him this morning, but he wasn't in his room when I went to find him. I don't even like running this early. I literally only do it because it's what he prefers."

Sam laughed, enjoying anything that annoys Bucky. "Dude, chill. He probably just forgot you were going with him."

Tony walked into the kitchen as well, trying to tune out the whines coming from Bucky, but failing.

"That's what I though, but he's always back by now." Bucky huffed, annoyed with Sam for laughing.

"Who?" Tony asked, now slightly intrigued.

"Steve. I haven't seen him since yesterday." Bucky replied as he angrily ate an apple.

"Really?" Tony sounded mildly concerned, immediately alerting Sam and confusing Bucky.

"You don't think?" Sam asked, ignoring Bucky for the time being.

"I don't know!" Tony looked bewildered. "Friday, where is Capsicle?"

"Captain Rogers left yesterday evening with Y/N L/N." The AI easily replied.

"Who?" Bucky questioned the room, never having learned your name.

"You know the woman who's been sitting outside every Saturday?" Bucky nodded to Sam, unsure why he was bringing it up. "Well, Steve went to ask her why she was here last night."

"Nat told me she was just some fan, wanted to see you all." Bucky furrowed his brow, thinking over the new information on Steve's wearabouts.

"Well, yeah that's what we thought. Look, she said she wanted to talk to you specifically." Sam explained, ignoring the pointed glare from Tony.

"What? Why didn't you tell me?" Bucky rose from his chair, annoyed at everyone now. "Now she's got Steve?"

"Relax, Steve can handle himself. She cleared her background check. We really don't have any reason to believe he's in danger." Tony's words were more to convince himself than anyone else. He's the one who said Cap should go check it out if he was so curious.

"Steve's too trusting. What if it was a trap?" Bucky questioned, glaring daggers at the other two men.

Before they could respond, Friday chimed in with more information.

"Captain Rogers just entered the elevator from the parking garage."

"See, he's fine." Tony glared back at Bucky, secretly relieved that Steve was fine.

Bucky just rolled his eyes before leaving, heading for the elevators to yell at Steve for ditching him this morning.

When the elevator doors opened, however, Steve was not alone.

"Hey, punk, why'd you ditch me- Oh. Who are you?" Bucky eyed you suspiciously, looking between you and Steve.

Before Bucky interrupted, Steve was trying to reassure you that everything would work out. He had a hand on your back, rubbing up and down to soothe your nerves.

His other arm was occupied by the box of scrapbooks, or else he probably would have hugged you again.

You were holding a large sheet pan, three pie dishes sitting on top.

Steve was blushing, a surefire sign Bucky had seen something he wasn't supposed to.

"Oh, um. Hi. My name is Y/N L/N." You froze, not thinking you would have to see him so soon. You could see the family resemblance between him, your great grandma, and your mom.

"The car girl." He nodded, trying to piece together the events of last night.

"Yep, that's me." You laughed nervously, unsure of what he already knew.

"Buck, do me a favor? Let us out of the elevator." Steve eyed him, mildly annoyed with the ambush.

Bucky moved to the side, allowing you and Steve to exit the elevator. You followed Steve down the hall to the kitchen, where you put the cobblers on the counter.

Sam and Tony were still there, eating various foods.

"Well, hello there." Tony greeted when he spotted you, intrigued by the development. He looked at Steve for an explanation.

"Y/N made plum cobbler." Steve said instead, moving his hand back to the small of your back.

Bucky's eyes lit up at the mention of plums, enough to momentarily distract him from Steve's actions.

"Oh, right!" You took a cobbler out of the dish, moving toward Bucky. "This one's for you, because I read that you liked plums." You handed him the dish, quickly moving back to the others. "I also made a peach and an apple for everyone else." You smiled at Tony and Sam, unknowingly leaning slightly into Steve.

"Why does he get a special cobbler?" Sam whined, eagerly reaching for the other dishes.

Suddenly, all eyes were on you. Well, except Sam's who were on the peach cobbler.

"Oh, um, well, I was hoping I could talk to you." You looked at Bucky nervously, unsure of how he would respond.

"Anyone who bakes me a plum cobbler can talk to me, Doll." Natasha chose that exact moment to enter the room.

"Who made plum cobbler?" She looked around the room, eyes narrowing in your direction. "How did you get in here?"

"I brought her." Steve smiled at you before walking over to Natasha. He whispered in her ear, just loud enough for her to hear, but nobody else. "She's not a threat to your relationship, trust me."

Nat nodded her head, trusting Steve, although not for the reasons he thought. She could clearly see the blonde's affinity for you.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Bucky asked between bites of cobbler.

"It's really a private conversation." Steve answered for you, seeing how unsure of yourself you were.

"Then why do you know, punk?" Bucky countered.

"Well, I had to tell someone so I could finally talk to you. Steve's the one who asked." You smiled at Steve again, trying to convey how grateful you were with just a look.

Steve smiled back at you, while everyone in else just shared a knowing look.

Eventually, Steve cleared his throat. "Buck, can you just come with us?"

Bucky nodded, moving to follow Steve while still eating the cobbler. You followed the two of them as well, growing more nervous with each step.

Steve lead you to his room, placing the box of scrapbooks on the bed.

"Do you want me to stay?" Steve looked to you for an answer.

You took a deep breath, in all honestly you would love for him to stay, but you think you should probably just talk to Bucky first.

"No, that's okay. Come back in like, 30 minutes?" You scrunched up your face, unsure if 30 minutes was long enough, but knowing you would need the deadline if you were ever going to explain it all to Bucky.

Steve nodded, squeezing your shoulder as he passed you to leave the room.

"Um," you turned to Bucky, trying to think of where to start. "I don't know what you already know about me, but-"

"Nothing really. Except that you make a delicious plum cobbler." He smiled, helping to ease your nerves. Food really was the way to this man's heart.

"Oh, I guess I'll start where I started when I told Steve." You smiled at the mention of his name, unaware of your own actions. But Bucky noticed.

"My parents died a few months ago." Bucky's eyes went wide, trying to think of what this could have to do with him. "Um, it was a car accident. They both died on the scene." You took a deep breath, trying to push through the sad parts.

"I had to clean out their house, and I found some scrapbooks that lead me to you." You shifted closer to the bed, looking through the scrapbooks you brought.

You pulled out the one with the first picture you showed Steve, opening it and gesturing for Bucky to take it.

He set the cobbler on Steve's nightstand, cautiously reaching for the book. He looked at the picture for a long time before saying anything. And when he did talk, it was a whispered "Becca..."

He ran his fingers over the picture slowly, just staring. A few minutes later, he eagerly flipped the page. He spent a good 10 minutes just looking through all the books you handed him.

"Where did you get these?" He questioned, although not accusingly.

"I found them in my parents house. They were with a bunch of my grandma's stuff that she had from her mom." You wanted to ease him into it.

"So your great grandma..." He trailed off, disbelief clear across his face.

"Was Rebecca Barnes." You finished the sentence for him, nerves clear in your voice.

You weren't sure what to say next, so you waited for him to make the next move.

"So you're my... great-grand niece?" You nodded at his question, still unsure if he was happy with the news. "God, that makes me feel old."

You nearly cackled, surprised by the joke. He smiled when you laughed, glad to have cleared some of the tension.

"Why did you want to find me?" He questioned, the mood turning more serious again.

"Well, I was really close to my parents. They were the only family I had. When I found out you are family too, I just... I knew I needed to at least tell you." You shrugged at the end, unsure if you really answered his question.

"You wanted to tell me so badly that you sat outside the compound every Saturday for five weeks even after being ignored?" He was in shock that anyone would spend that much time and effort just to talk to him. You started panicking immediately.

"I'm so sorry if you didn't want to know! It was selfish of me to force this on you. I can go, if you want. You don't have to talk to me." You started questioning everything. You moved to put the books back in the box when he stopped you.

"Oh, um. I'm sorry, you can keep those. If you want!" Tears were threatening to fall down your cheeks when you remembered the ring. You froze with your hand in the box, not knowing if you'd want to part with it knowing you'd never see Bucky again.

"Y/N..." Something in the way he said your name made you look at him. "I- I'm glad you told me. Really glad. I, uh, I never thought I would have family, well besides Steve. You know what I mean." He ran a hand through his hair, and you noticed the tears in his eyes.

"I don't want you to go. It's just hard for me..." he paused, trying to figure out his emotions. "It's hard to believe that someone would care about me that much."

"Bucky, I don't know you." He frowned at your statement. "But, I would love to get to know you." You smiled at him, trying to be reassuring.

"I'm not so sure you would." His face was hard, staring at the ground.

"Bucky, you aren't a bad person. I mean, sure you've done bad things, but it wasn't your choice. You were forced to do those things. You can't let yourself be defined by them. You're here aren't you?"

"Here?" He questioned.

"Working with the Avengers, I mean. You go on missions to help save people. That's your choice. That's who you are. I would be honored to get to know that person."

You smiled, waiting for him to say something.

"Are you sure?" He still looked unsure.

"God, maybe I get my stubbornness from you." You both laughed at that. "I am 100% sure."

"Wow." He shook his head, still in shock.

A knock sounded on the door before Steve came back in. "Is now a good time?" He asked, still standing in the doorway.

You nodded appreciatively. "Thank you." You pulled him into a hug, needing the emotional support.

"Of course. I'm happy I could help." He rubbed your back, reciprocating the hug. "Did you give him the ring yet?" He asked when you took a step back.

You shook your head, reaching into the box for the last item. "I, um, I thought you might want this." You handed him the box, nerves peaking through again.

He opened it, a soft smile on his face when he recognized it. "My mom's engagement ring."

You smiled, happy that he recognized it. "It was my mom's as well."

The two of you stared a the ring for awhile, reminiscing on time spent with your parents.

Eventually, Bucky picked the cobbler back up, not wanting to let it go to waste.

Steve couldn't help but roll his eyes at his friend. "Wow, jerk. You're just gonna go back to eating."

"Yes, punk. My great-grand niece made me a plum cobbler, and I tend to fully enjoy it."

"Great-grand niece. Ha, that makes you sound so old."

It was fun for you to see the two interacting like this, especially after the emotional hurdles you just ran.

"It's fine, Stevie. Let him enjoy the cobbler." Your face went red, not having meant to use the nickname.

"Yeah Stevie, let me enjoy the cobbler." Bucky couldn't help but poke fun, knowing there was an unspoken attraction between the two of you.

Somehow your face got even redder. Steve just rolled his eyes.

"Fine, eat your cobbler. Only because I had some of the apple one and it was delicious. It would be a shame to waste any."

You smiled at the compliment, embarrassment subsiding a bit. Steve sat down on the bed between you and Bucky, eager to ask his friend about some of the pictures. Steve put his arm around you, squeezing your shoulder as he spoke to Bucky.

You felt your eyes growing heavy, exhausted since your nerves kept you up most of the night. You rested your head on Steve's shoulder, soaking in his warmth as you cuddled closer.

Steve just rubbed your arm like it was the most natural thing in the world. Bucky narrowed his eyes at the interaction, realization dawning on his face.

"Oh my god. My best friend likes my great-grand niece. And she likes him." He said it so matter of fact, the two of you didn't bother denying it. You just smiled, and cuddled closer together.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x natasha #bucky barnes x natasha romanoff #tony stark #sam wilson #steve rogers #bucky barnes #marvel fic #clint barton #Bucky Barnes x platonic!reader

[violettelueur]

— JUJUTSU KAISEN EPISODE FOUR || CURSE WOMB MUST DIE

↳ featuring : itadori yuji + fushiguro megumi + kugisaki nobara + ryomen sukuna + ijichi kiyotaka from jujutsu kaisen

↳ warnings : swearing + violence + mention of blood + mention of poison + EXTREME grammar issues

↳ form : story

↳ published : 23 february

↳ pronouns : she/her

↳ word count : 6.1k

↳ synopsis : within the jujutsu world, there were three famous clans to be aware of, the Kamo clan, Zenin clan and the Gojo clan. However, unknown to many sorcerers there was one last family that was known to be apart of the three, only for them to disappear after the golden era leading some to speculate that they had died in battle after the sealing of ryomen sukuna, but....

↳ previous episode : girl of steel

↳ next episode : curse womb must die II

↳ barista’s notes : i am back again with another episode of jujutsu kaisen everyone ʕ •ᴥ•ʔゝ☆ i hope you guys haven’t gotten bored with this whole series, to be honest i forgot how long they take to write since it is a whole epsiode i am trying to retell with a new character in ʕ ㅇ ᴥ ㅇʔ ALSO i have created a masterlist for it as well as future stories i might write in the future! are you excited?  ʕ￫ᴥ￩　ʔ

BEFORE READING, I NEED YOU TO BE AWARE OF THIS:

1. the whole story belongs to Gege Akutami and the credits go to them and them only

2. the spell curses used belong to Tite Kubo due to them being the ‘Kidos’ being used on the manga and anime ‘Bleach’ - but none is mentioned in this chapter

2.5 for the ‘cursed spells’/kidos (bleach) i will link this video here and tell you the time stamp to check out what i am intending to show - remember i add a few twist here and there by adding the katana to link with Y/N’s cursed technique

Destructive Curse Spell number one: Sho : 3:26-3:34

Binding Curse Spell number eighty-one: Danku : 3:03-3:07

3. if you are confused on anything, please don’t hesitate to message me since i know this whole thing is so confusing

Shutting your dorm room door closed, you carefully wrapped yourself in the thin white cardigan you had brought out with you before quietly making your way outside the Jujutsu Tech dormitory wanting some form of fresh air due to your incapability to sleep for the time being.

As you began to walk around aimlessly, you quickly looked down upon your phone - nearly blinded by the brightness of the screen -  to find out that it was exactly 2 am making you come to the conclusion that everyone was probably asleep and that no one would find you out for the time being. 

To be honest, it wasn’t a surprise that you couldn’t sleep, it wasn’t like you never had these types of nights before. Although, they were becoming a bit more common than what you would have liked during your lifetime, especially at the age you were now where sleep was essential.

Finally making it to the track field (where you were supposed to be in the next few hours for training), you slowly crouched down to take a seat on the stone steps that lead to the tracks itself before cuddling into the warm cardigan since the light winds were slightly colder than what you have imagined.

‘It’s such a drag knowing that I have to be here, later on, to train with the second-years,’ you thought to yourself for a second before letting out a sigh of frustration, while running your hand through your hair as if it was some coping mechanism for the pending stress that was about to explode anytime soon.

“How long has it been?” you quietly uttered to yourself before looking onto the field as if there was something interesting insights or someone was going to answer your rhetorical question.

“A week? Two?” you continuously questioned yourself, before gently placing your hand on your upper arm as if you still felt the linger cursed technique you had used during the battle you had with him.

‘You possess such intellect, such skill, such power and such talent and yet you refuse to go against me with your full potential, are you mocking me?’

“Maybe,” you whispered your answer, before going back to the electronic device you had in your hand to open Spotify as you decided you needed something to fill up the silence with hint sounds of the wind, grasshoppers and passing cars that were surrounding you. 

However, before you could press play on the chosen song you deemed was quiet enough to play out loud, there was a sudden presence your felt from behind causing you to raise your index finger to hit them with some sort of curse spell to warn them only for a familiar voice to call out.

“It’s just me”

Turning your body around, you found a tall male with erratic hair standing behind you with a non-expressive face before looking down at the dog that was right beside him with what some people say a happy grin on its face. 

Turning back around, you shut your phone off before placing it in the pocket of your black joggers that you wore to bed, allowing the shikigami sorcerer to sit beside you with a gap while his divine dog took the opportunity to sit between the two bodies as it processed to rest it’s head on your shoulder, which you allowed since it was adorable not to deny.

“Can’t sleep?” you asked Fushiguro, as you processed to look onto the field while raising your hand to pet the dog’s head causing it to let out a happy sound before further resting itself upon your shoulder.

“Yeah..same for you?” Fushiguro then questioned, leading you to let out a hum in agreement to tell him you were in the same situation before silence took over between both you and him once again.

To be honest, the silence between you both wasn’t awkward at all, it surprisingly felt natural. Although, even if it was comfortable between you and Fushiguro, you both still have questions for each other, well rather Fushiguro had more questions for you than you had for him. 

He just didn’t know where to start.

“L/N?” Fushiguro called out quietly (so quiet that some people might not be able to hear), leading you to turn your head towards his direction while his divine dog’s head covered your vision slightly. “How strong are you?” he then asked, causing you to express a confused look before turning back to the track field in front of you as if you were trying to find the right response to answer his question as if it wasn’t an easy one to reply to.

“Not that strong,” you replied in a nonchalant tone, leading Fushiguro to look at you with widened eyes as your returned response didn’t make any sense to him. 

It really didn’t at all.

However, he didn’t have the strength to question your answer.

If he had listened to you back then, would your other classmate be alive with you all right now?

“Fushiguro?” you now called out causing the sorcerer to give you a hum informing you that he was listening in to what you had to ask or say. 

“How long has it been since that day?”

                                              ꕥ

The rain was currently pouring. However, it wasn’t too heavy nor was it too light but it was enough to make the mission that you, Itadori, Fushiguro and Kugisaki were assigned to be eerier than it considered to be.

“Our window verified the curse womb three hours ago,” a man, who you recalled was named Ijichi Kiyotaka, mentioned before continued with, “once ninety per cent were successfully evacuated, they made the call to seal off the centre, citizens within a 500-metre radius has been evacuated, as well”.

‘Only ninety per cent? That means either the other ten are missing in there…..or dead’

“Ijichi-san, question,” Itadori stated before raising his hand as if he was in a classroom asking a teacher a question, “what’s a ‘window’ here?”

“A window is a member of Jujutsu Tech who can see curses, they aren’t sorcerers, though,” Ijichi explained as his arms were behind his back in a professional manner.

“Oh, okay,” Itadori muttered, as he understood the explanation that was given to him.

“Let’s continue,” Ijichi quickly stated as it seemed he had more information to be given to all four of you. 

“Detainee Block 2, at present, five detainees remain there with the curse womb, if this curse womb is the type that metamorphoses, we predict it will become a special-grade cursed spirit,” Ijichi announced in a serious tone causing you, Fushiguro and Kugisaki to express a stern look upon your faces.

‘Special-grade? Wouldn’t they make a special-grade sorcerer take the job instead of us? Unless….’

“Hey, so...I still don’t really understand what ‘special grade’ means,” Itadori expressed with an innocent face as he looked at the three of you leading Fushiguro and Kugisaki to give him the fed-up look, while you just shifted your eyesight at your classmate since you understood why he didn’t understand any of the terminologies that were thrown at him, your adoptive father wasn’t the best teacher when it came to non-practical work after all.

“Then allow me to explain it so even idiots can understand,” Ijichi stated as if he was calling Itadori an ‘idiot’ causing you to zone out of the quick lesson to look at the detention centre that was in front of everyone right now. From what you could sense, there was an overwhelming presence beginning to loom over from the building that the other sorcerers didn’t seem to feel causing you to look at Itadori will a worried expression since you knew he didn’t have control of the newfound cursed energy he had gained from eating Sukuna’s finger.

Looking around to make sure no one noticed you, you quietly went up to Itadori from behind before hovering your hand over the back of his neck before using your cursed energy for the spell you were trying to prepare for him in advance.

‘This should protect him for one hit if we come into a surprise attack, but there is nothing else I can do without the other’s noticing’ you thought in a frustrated mindset before silently taking a step back to where you were previous to make sure no one noticed that you had planted a protective spell on your classmate.

“That’s real bad!” Itadori shouted, causing you to zone back into the conversation that was in the process.

“Normally a jujutsu sorcerer on par with the cursed spirit would take on the mission. On a day like today, that would be Gojo-sensei,” Fushiguro explained into further detail, while Kugisaki seemed to now paint a worried expression on her face.

“I-I see,” Itadori stuttered as he looked at the erratic-haired sorcerer before looking around as he then asked, “so where is Gojo-sensei?” which made sense since none of the sorcerers in front of you had ever fought with a special-grade from what you could sense.

“Away on business,” Fushiguro answered in a serious tone, which caused Itadori to give him a confused look as he then stated, “he’s not someone who should be loafing around that school in the first place,”.

‘But that doesn’t explain why four first-years have been sent to deal with this situation...”

“Unfortunately, we’re constantly short-handed in this business, you’ll often have to undertake missions beyond your power,” Ijichi expressed as he pushed up his glasses. “The current case, however, is an abnormal one, and most urgent. Do not fight under any circumstances, if you encounter a special-grade, your options are to either run or die,” Ijichi then stated with a serious tone leading you to internally scoff at the warning he gave.

‘That’s easier said than done’

Even though you knew he cared about the safety of everyone that was preparing to go in, it was ridiculous to say to any sorcerer not to fight since once you knew once you encountered a curse, there was no way of getting out of the fight at all, you knew that from experience.

“Please just listen to your fears, do not forget that your mission here is strictly the verification and rescue of survivors,” Ijichi repeated.

“Sorry, but as we are talking those ‘survivors’ in there are most likely dead, there is only a one to five per cent chance that there are any survivors,” you commented with a straight face causing all three of your classmates to look at you with a surprised expression on what you just said, but before anyone could deny your statement.

“Excuse me! Excuse me, where’s Tadashi?!” a worried voice cried, causing everyone to look, only to find a woman waving her hand while guards tried to push her back, preventing her to come any closer to all of you.

“Is Tadashi...Is my son Tadashi all right?!” the woman asked in a panic, leading you to give her a sympathetic look before you slowly walked up to her with a calm expression on your face. 

‘If someone asks if someone is okay at the beginning of the mission, take it like a way a doctor calms down a patient or how a police officer informs the public about a case, dear. Imagine it from your perspective, you would want to know if I was okay, wouldn’t you?’

‘Yeah, I would mother’

“Ma’am, we are going inside to see if there is anyone else in the building, if we find your son, we will inform you as quickly as we can, is that okay with you?” you gently asked the worried mother since you needed to calm her down in the worst-case scenario that you, your classmates and she had to prepare for. 

Looking at you straight in the eye, she timidly nodded at you causing you to present her with a small smile to help calm her down further. “Please, I need you to step away for the time being since there is a possibility that someone has spread a poisonous gas throughout the centre, but I can not give you any more detail than I can offer,” you explained to her causing the mother’s expression to turned into a shocked one before dropping onto her knees as she grew numb.

“Please find my son,” she begged quietly as tears flowed down her face.

“We’ll try our best ma’am,” you answered her before turning back to your classmates as they looked at you with amazed faces since it seemed like you had done this a million times before - like a profession.

‘Let’s hope that one to five per cent change is in your favour’

“Fushiguro, Kugisaki, Gojo, we’re gonna save them!” Itadori announced in a determined tone causing everyone to turn to him with a determined expression on their faces.

“Of course we are,” Kugisaki answered.

                                          ꕥ

All four of you were now walking towards the entrance of Eushi Detention Centre’s Detainee Block 2 after you have given your black cloth bag that was holding your katana for Ijichi to hold since there was no need to hide the weapon anymore.

“Be careful,” Ijichi said, before raising his fingers to prepare the sleeve that was needed to consume the detention centre, so the outside world didn’t see what was going on inside.

Suddenly, a dark blue aura was cast onto the middle of the sky before slowly descending on all sides like a dome covering a plate of food causing the sky to darken to Itadori’s surprise.

“It’s becoming night!” Itadori shouted as he took a full preview of what was going on, leading Fushiguro to take a glance behind him to inform his obvious classmate that it was the veil Ijichi was placing.

“There’s a residential area nearby, so the barrier conceals us from the outside world,” Fushiguro explained, leading Itadori to express his amazement while Kugisaki gave him the irritated look as well comment since it was basic sorcerer knowledge to know what a veil was.

Suddenly, you heard a loud clap that echoed around the area causing you to look in the direction on where you heard it, only to see Fushiguro’s hands be in a position that was familiar to you.

“Demon Dog!” Fushiguro said before a shower suddenly took form from his to summon the white divine dog that you knew so well from the first time you met him to appear as it howled in response. “He’ll let us know if the curse gets close,” Fushiugro informed you all as the dog looked in his master’s direction.

“Oh, I see!” Itadori said in a light tone before he made his way towards the shikigami to pet it’s snow-white while chanting ‘good boy’ to it as he then expressed his gratitude for its support. However, it seemed like the dog was interested in something else as it stood up on its back legs to make its way towards you before whining as if it wanted something from you.

Looking down at the dog that was now staring at you with its yellow eyes, you couldn’t help but rub its head leading it to relish your affection that you were giving it as it moved it’s head further into your palm as if it can get more out of you.

“I think it’s time to go to Fushiguro don’t you think?” you asked the dog in a light tone, causing it to whine for a moment before going back to its master so it was prepared for the mission that it was about to undertake.

Pushing the door open, Fushiguro and Itadori were in front while Kugisaki and you were behind as everyone prepared themselves for what they were about to go into. “Let’s go,” Fushiguro stated before taking the first step leading the dog to follow in next as well for the rest of you.

However, before you took one step closer into the building you realised something was not what it seemed. From what you can recall, according to Ichiji, the building was said to be a two-story dorm and not the one, you were standing in front of right now, there was no possible way, it was too high up.

‘It’s not a maisonette, it’s too advanced for that,’ you thought as you continued to analyse the surroundings before concluding what you had dreaded, ‘it’s an incomplete Innate Domain, meaning the curse has already fully developed!”

“Hold up!” you shouted at the three sorcerers behind you causing them to pause before turning to look at you, only to find you staring up which led them to do the same leading them to realise why you had halted their movements in the first place.

“Right now, we’re in the middle of the development of an Innate Domain! Is there a door behind me?” you asked in a panic, causing everyone to look at you, only to discover the door had disappeared.

“Th-The door’s gone!” Itadori mentioned in a surprised tone causing you to look at him with widened eyes before turning around to only discover he wasn’t lying to you at all.

‘Shit! How the hell am I going to get everyone back safely? They don’t know how to deal with a special grade from what I can tell, let alone an incomplete Innate Domain’

“How?! We just came in through here, didn’t we?!” Kugisaki mentioned in a stutter as she pointed at the direction where the door should have been while Itadori nodded at her with a few cold sweats dripping down his face.

“What do we do? Ah, what do we do about this?” Itadori and Kugisaki sang as they danced in circles, in a way trying to ease their stress and the tension that came along with the whole situation nearly causing you to giggle at the sight.

“It’ll be fine, the dog remembers the scent of the entrance,” Fushiguro interrupted as he looked annoyed at the two dancers, while the mentioned dog looked back to check on everyone.

“Oh, my~” Itadori and Kugisaki warmheartedly expressed before they started to pet the dog once their mood was lifted with them shouted how they were going to give him jerky later and how much of a ‘good boy’ it was, letting the dog once again relish in the attention that it was being present with.

“You are way too calm!” Fushiguro angrily expressed at two since the mood didn’t match the setting they were in at all.

“You really are dependable, Fushiguro!” Itadori expressed with a grin causing Fushiguro to snap out of his anger. “Thanks to you, we’ll be able to recuse people and save ourselves, too!” Itadori then commented, leading Fushiguro to look at the ground before you suddenly decided to take the first step of carrying on since you were being cautious with the three other sorcerers with you.

‘How long has it been since I faced a special-grade in a fight?’

“Let’s keep moving,” the shikigami user commanded in a stern voice since he saw you making the first way through, letting the other two know that they needed to start moving as well.

While walking, there were the eerie echoes of your footstep causing you to wonder where the actual curse was before entering what seemed to be the centre of the domain. However, you suddenly paused leading the other three to wonder why you came to a halt before looking at the sight that you were looking in the direction of.

Being the first one to react, Itadori rushed to what seemed to be someone’s body - well half of it - and maybe as the second victim since there was a full skeleton that was seemed to be curled up in an excruciating way next to the main body causing you to give your condolences to whoever the person was before observing the area around you to make sure the mention special-grade curse wasn’t near at all.

“Atrocious,” Kugisaki commented in disgust as she stared at the corpses insight.

“That’s...three people, right?” Fushiguro questioned as he quickly took note of how many more victims or survivors there could be - if there were any at this point.

Crouching down, Itadori didn’t answer his classmate’s question, as he then tugged on the detention centre’s dark blue uniform to check the person’s identification, only to realise something that he didn’t want to happen.

“Let’s take this body back,” Itadori suddenly stated, causing confusion to rise within the group since they didn’t know what caused the salmon-haired boy to comment something like that.

“Huh?” Kugissaki asked in confusion.

“It’s that woman’s son,” Itadori regretfully stated, causing you to close your eyes before letting out an internal sign of disappointment before coming to the realisation that you weren’t really surprised at the outcome.

‘Sorry, Ma’am, it seemed the one to five chance wasn’t with you for today’

“But…” Kugisaki slowly stuttered out before being interrupted by Itadori as he then explained that the victim’s face wasn’t mangled and that they still had to give the body back to the mother since it wouldn’t be hard to accept that fact without the body, yet before he could carry on with the plan he was unexpectantly coming up with, he felt someone pull him back by the hood causing him to be surprised at the sudden movement.

“We have to find and verify two more, leave that body behind,” Fushiguro once again commanded, which caused Itadori to shout at him back as he didn’t understand why the body should be left behind.

“Quit joking around! We turned around, and the way we got in here was gone! We won’t be able to come back for it later!” Itadori stated.

“I didn’t say come back for it! I said to leave it behind!” Fushiguro argued back in the same volume of tone, trying to make Itadori understand the situation that they were in and it was not possible to bring the body back at all - there was no point to him. “I have no intention of risking my own life to save someone I had no intention of saving in the first place!” Fushiguro frustratingly stated, only leading Itadori to grab his collar in return as a way to rebuke.

“No intention of saving him? What do you mean?!” Itadori asked in a perplexed tone, confused on what Fushiguro meant when it was their mission to save the remaining survivors that might be in the centre right now.

“This is a juvenile detention centre, Jujutsu sorcerers are granted access to all information about the scene beforehand,” Fushiguro declared before continuing his explanation by stating, “this Okazaki Tadashi hit a little girl on her way home from school while driving without a license, it was his second offence of driving without a license,” leading Itadori to look at his friend in vexation and surprise at the news he was receiving about the man he was going to ‘save’.

“I know you’re stuck on saving lots of people and guiding them to proper deaths, but what are you going to do when someone you saved kills someone else in the future?” Fushiguro asked with a stern tone trying to make his point of view understandable to the boy in front of him.

“Then why did you bother saving me?!” Itadori cried out, as a way to rebuke his statement due to the situation of him being the vessel of Ryomen Sukuna, only to gain nothing but silence from the shikigami user in front of him as he tightened the grip on the collar he was grabbing.

“Oi stop being such drags, I didn’t come to Jujutsu Tech to hear your reasons for being a jujutsu sorcerer, get moving!” you demanded in a menacing tone before unhooking your katana that was secured on your lower back horizontally, preparing to use the weapon to separate them.

“Cut it out! Christ, what are you two doing?! You’re both idiots” Kugisaki shouted in equal frustration with you, as she made her way towards the two boys with her fists in the air.

“Think about the time and place if you-”

However, before she could continue the angry rant, she was suddenly sucked into the floor causing you to quickly react by trying to grab her hand, only to be too late when she was fully consumed into the hole that was created.

“Kugisaki?” Itadori called out in confused, only for Fushiguro to become shocked at the new situation that had occurred before turning forwards to see the sudden and dreadful outcome of his divine dog that was supposed to detect if any curses were near leading you to look at the same direction before suddenly feeling a presence of what you should have felt earlier.

‘If those two drags didn’t distract me with their argument, we shouldn’t have to worry about our wellbeing right now!’

“Itadori! L/N! We’re running, we’ll search for Kugisaki la-” Fushiguro panic before you suddenly screamed at both of them.

“DON’T MOVE!” you screamed, once you suddenly made eye contact on the curse that was standing right in near them, causing you to grip on your katana tighter as all three of you stayed completely still while you were coming up with a plan to see if you could put a distance between the curses and your classmate.

Suddenly, you saw Itadori’s shaky hand reach over to his weapon as he unleashed it from the leather casing before violently swinging it to cut the curse in some way, only for the sudden decapitation of his hand to be the result of his attempt causing massive amounts of blood to spill like a fountain.

“Itadori?” Fushiguro's voice shook while you were in the opposite of that mood right now.

Swiftly, you slide your feet around, landing between the boys before raising your katana making sure the tip on the black wooden casing was pointing at the special-grade curse’s face. 

“Destructive Curse Spell number one: Sho,” you chanted, causing your curse energy to travel from your arms to the length of your sword before a small shot of cursed energy to thrust its force against the curse’s face leading it to be violently pushed back against the concrete wall before turning towards Itadori with an angered expression, “I told you not to move and you decide to go against me!” you screamed in frustration before quickly turning back to look at the direction on where the special grade was flung in a confused but equally concentrated manner.

‘That curse spell isn’t even that strong, it’s my weakest, yet it managed to make it fly across the room, is it really a special grade by nature…..or did it eat something?’

“I can’t escape after it’s gotten this close! Hey, Sukuna! If I die, you die too, right?” Itadori determinedly asked, causing you to look at him with a startled expression.

‘Does this guy have a death warrant? Are you even listening to me?!’

“If you don’t want that, then help me out!” Itadori commanded leading you to further look at him like he was the craziest person in the world right now.

“Are you stupid?!” you screamed, only for Itadori to ignore you as Sukuna’s eye and mouth appeared on his cheek.

“Nope! Even if the parts of me inside you die, there are eighteen other fragments of my soul. Still, irritatingly enough, I don’t have control of this body, if you want to switch, go ahead and switch,” Sukuna taunted as he continued with his threats, “but once you do, I’ll kill that brat before the cursed spirit can, then I’ll go for that woman, she’s a lively one, I’ll have fun with her then I’ll go to her right there, she seemed like someone that knows how to fight,” leading you to place your weapon inches away from his eye.

“Stop talking, you’re making me lose concentration Sukuna,” you stated in a nonchalant tone before going back to find an explanation on why your cursed technique managed to give so much force to the special grade that was now starting to stand back up on its feet.

“I’m not going to let you do that!” Itadori declared in an inflamed tone, only for the King of Curses to taunt back without any hesitation.

“I bet! But if you’re too focused on me, your friends are gonna die,” Sukuna teased, causing you to look at the small eye and mouth with an annoyed look on your face.

“I said stop talking, you’re making me lose concentration,” you threateningly stated, only to suddenly realise that the special-grade was about to attack once again, leading to your cursed energy to flow from the palm of your hands to the tip of your fingers as your placed you left hand up like you were stopping someone.

“Binding Curse Spell number eighty-one: Danku!” you chanted, leading to the familiar large rectangular defensive wall to form in front of you, Itadori and Fushiguro, protecting you from cursed energy that the special-grade it was about to attack you with, but the concrete that wasn’t behind the wall didn’t seem to survive since the concrete turned into debris leaving evidence of its strength for you and Fushiguro to observe.

‘Pure cursed energy? So it doesn’t have any cursed techniques….ah what a drag…’ you concluded before turning to Fushiguro only to see him with widened eyes to that attack causing you to predict that he also thought the same thing as you.

“Fushiguro! Fushiguro! Fushiguro!” Itadori yelled out, trying to get the skikigami user’s attention before his third call caught his awareness as he turned to look at the screaming boy. “Take L/N and Kugisaki and get out of here!” Itadori demanded, causing you to look at him once again with an astonished look on your face, yet before you could grab his red collar in a way to argue his point, Itadori continued with, “I’ll keep this one bust until you three are out, as soon as you’re out, give me some kind of signal and once you do...I’ll switch with Sukuna,” to which Fushiguro screamed at his reckless plan. However, you were too focused on the curse in front of you, wondering why it was considered a special-grade then it took some sort of damage from a weak technique of yours.

As of right now, the curse seemed to be enjoying itself even when you managed to damage it and deflect its attack with two simple cursed spells. There was no point in letting your katana out of its wooden casing, it wouldn't be able to take the damage but there was the situation with Kugisaki being somewhere in the building as well, so there was a risk of taking your weapon out.

‘It’s definitely ate something, but what? There is a chance that it is Sukuna’s finger but that’s rare, besides it seemed like the fool hasn’t sensed anything from it to be his finger’

However, before you could even prepare your next attack to exorcise the curse to end the life and death situation Itadori and Fushiguro were in, you surprisingly felt someone grab your wrist before pulling you away from the battle that you had started leading you to look at the culprit to find out it was Fushiguro, who was dragging you away from the situation.

“What are you doing?!” you shouted before trying to pry your hand away from his grasp, only for him to tighten his hold in a way to not let you escape.

“We’re running, we need to find Kugisaki before giving Itadori the signal to get out of there,” Fushiguro explained in a stressed manner leading you to scream back at him on the thoughtless decision that had been made without your input.

“Are you crazy? You need to take back Itadori and let me fight that curse Fushiguro, he won’t be able to survive at all!” you yelled out in anger.

“Are you the crazy one? We don’t know what grade sorcerer you are and you want to exorcise that thing?!” Fushiguro argued back.

“So what makes Itadori capable? He doesn’t know how to control cursed energy or any techniques, TAKE ME BACK!” you panicked, only for his grip to tighten more at your comment of going back.

No one words were exchanged.

                                            ꕥ

Within a flash, you and Fushiguro managed to grab Kugisaki before she was devoured by the curse she was fighting against while both of you were trying to find her.

At this current moment in time, you were outside the exit with Kugisaki in Ijichi’s arm, Fushiguro on the floor tired from running while you were standing behind the other divine dog that was giving Itadori the signal. However, even though you knew the signal was for Itadori to switch with Sukuna, you were conflicted on the idea leading your body to move forward towards the entrance to enter again. 

However, you were stopped by the black dog using its body to push you back, once it was done with the signal it was giving to Itadori.

“Stop it!” Fushiguro stated as he stood up to put his arm in front of you to prevent you from moving forward. However, you were angry, pissed off and frustrated at this point.

“You should have listened to me, you drag!” you screamed at him before gripping the arm that was blocking your path. However, while you were looking at the erratic-haired sorcerer with pure rage in your eyes, Fushiguro was startled about the immense amount of cursed energy that was surrounding you as he was shocked that he didn’t notice it earlier when he had met you, it was alarming and intimidating to him as he didn’t even stand a chance to dominant his over you, it extended in power and strength than he had ever thought it would have.

How did you hide it so well?

                                             ꕥ

Currently, you were at the gated entrance to the Eushi Detention Centre, where you had laid Kugisaki down at the back seats of the car before closing the door to stand in the rain with Fushiguro - much to your annoyance.

“Please explain the evacuation area to ten kilometres,” Fushiguro stated in a serious tone since he didn't know what could happen next since Itadori was still inside the building. Expanding the evacuation area was the best thing to do right now.

“What about you and Gojo?” Ijichi asked in a worried tone as he turned to look at you both through the gap on the window of his car.

“We’ll wait here for Itadori to return,” you stated in a serious tone to which Ichiji understood since you were so adamant to enter back to the building despite the many attempts Fushiguro tried to stop you.

“After I take Kugisaki-san to the hospital, I’ll return as quickly as possible,” Ijichi declared, only for Fushiguro to give a discouraged look to him before stating, “no, there wouldn’t be much point in you-”

“I need you to come back but I want you to stay at least one kilometre away from the evacuation area, at this rate if Itadori has switched, I want you to be as safe as possible but in the end, if you don’t hear from us at least an hour when you come back, go back to Jujutsu Tech immediately,” you interrupted Fushiguro by pushing your body in front of him while giving Ijichi the instructions you needed him to hear since you didn’t know the possible outcome that this was going to go to. 

“If you can, please send a grade one sorcerer or higher but that won’t be necessary if I don't die,” you sternly commented, leading both Fushiguro and Ijichi to shiver at the statement you just announced.

Still shaken at what you had just said, Ijichi sent himself off before closing the window to prevent any cold raindrops from coming at him as he drove away from the area you and Fushiguro were standing in right now.

“If you don’t want to listen to me, I ain’t going to listen to you at all then Fushiguro,” you stated with a frown painted on your face before looking back at the building behind his body.

Taking your katana, you looked at the bottom of the handle to find a metal loop at the bottom with a red charm tied before it was simply slowly unwinded by you as you prepared for the worst that was about to come.

“What are you doing L/N?” Fushiguro asked in a worried tone, causing you to turn to look at him with a deadpan expression.

“Just preparing for the worst Fushiguro”

 © violettelueur 2021 : written and published by violettelueur - do not steal or repost

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jujutsu kaisen imagine #jjk imagines #jjk imagine #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #itadori yuji #yuji itadori #fushiguro megumi #megumi fushiguro #kugisaki nobara #nobara kugisaki #ryomen sukuna #sukuna #ijichi kiyotaka #kiyotaka ijichi #itadori yuji x reader #fushiguro megumi x reader #kugisaki nobara x reader #ryomen sukuna x reader #sukuna x reader #itadori yuji imagines #itadori yuji imagine #fushiguro megumi imagines #fushiguro megumi imagine #kugisaki nobara imagines #kugisaki nobara imagine #ryomen sukuna imagines

[damn-stark]

Ch.11: Out of the shadows

Chapter 11 of Cherry

A/N: I hope you guys enjoy the chapter 😏

Warning- ANGST, LONG CHAPTER!, Talks of loss, violence, fluff, swearing, SLOWBURN.

Pairing- Jean Kirstein x reader,

Episodes- 3x38-3x39

(Let me know if you want to be tagged)

————

“Is she still out there?”

Sasha looks out the big glass window and nods her head to confirm your wandering question. Albeit she doesn’t linger behind to worry over Historia like you were.

For days now, ever since arriving at the secluded cabin, Historia has liked to go outside a few minutes before the sun set to sit on the grass all by herself. She never asks for company, or explains why she does; mainly because she rarely speaks, but nevertheless she just sits outside all by herself and doesn’t return inside until the night has completely taken over the bright sky.

Except for today. Historia was outside, but there was no sunset to admire. The sky was invaded with dark clouds that brought rain to patter down onto the earth, making the air smell bitter and yet sweet, but not allowing the sky to give any clear indication when day transitioned into night. Not like Historia seemed to mind as she stayed under the rain, letting you build the courage to go speak to her. Even if it meant with you'd get dirty and soaked.

“Mind if I bring some light?” You ask her quietly as you set the lamp down beside her.

Historia slowly drags her eyes up to your face and right away notices the hesitance on your face. She doesn’t speak about it and instead shakes her head to answer your question before returning her gaze to nothing in particular.

“Okay,” you breathe out as you painfully sit down on the ground beside her. “Nice night, don’t you agree?”

“I suppose,” Historia shrugs gloomily.

You smile softly and lift your hand to watch the raindrops collect on your palm. “I love the sound of rain.” You ball your hand and turn it around to then open your fist and let the rain drip down from your hand. “Especially when I’m reading, I like to sit by a window, with tea and a book. It’s very comforting.” You blink to look back at her, seeing that your words went through one ear and left through the other. Her wavered attention didn't discourage you, it should have, but you stayed prominent to your spot and goal—“You know,” you continued in a much softer voice. “When I miss someone who’s gone, I like to wear something that belonged to them. It doesn’t smell like them anymore, but knowing that they used to wear it brings me comfort.” You sigh deeply and look down at your hands on your lap.

Historia finally pulls her attention from the dark horizon ahead and shifts her eyes to look at you. She stays quiet and let’s the sound of the rain falling on the roof of the cabin, and on the ground play uninterrupted for a few minutes as the meaning behind your words processed in her mind. She thought of not answering and being content with your suggestion in silence, but she needed to ask. Just once. “Do you miss him?”

You lift your head and turn your eyes to meet her blue ones that gleamed brighter by the tears welled in her eyes, and the light of the lamp in between you both. “Who?” You question cluelessly.

“Reiner.” She shares, making you grow stiff. “I mean I just saw the way he looked at you, the way he treated you. Were you guys dating?”

You shake your head and mindlessly begin fiddling with your fingers as you choose to answer her with the truth to one of her questions. “No we weren’t dating.” You pause and swallow thickly, taking note of your habit and instead tucking your hands into your sleeves to wipe the rain off your face. “It was just a fling, nothing to it. Plus,” you exhale deeply as your voice softens. “There's no room in my heart for traitors.”

“Was Ymir a traitor?” Historia asks bluntly, once again making you grow rigid with her very straightforward questions. This time instead of answering right away you wait and think of your words very carefully. You didn’t lie to her, or avoid answering, there was no need to with this question.

“No,” you shake your head, “she was different then the other two.” You shift around where you sat to be able to fully face her, while you kept ignoring the pouring rain that made your clothes stick to your body, and brought your body temperature down to an uncomfortable level. “When I was with them, after they took us, the one thing she was sure of was protecting you. She cares about you. She didn’t betray you. She wouldn't.”

Historia’s lip trembles before she drops her head to hide her emotions expressed on her face. Emotions she failed to contain and let out as quiet sobs that caused her whole body to tremble with cold and emotions. You wanted to comfort her, grab her shoulders or rub her back but she shot up and began to cry out what she had contained since Ymir left. “I can’t stand it! Why? She chose them over me?!” Her eyes snap up to meet your bewildered expression. “She said we’d live for our own sakes. But now she’s left me behind.” She falls down to sit on her knees, letting out a shaking breath and dropping her head again, letting the rain shower over her hunched body. “Just like everyone else did. My father, my mother—Ymir left me.”

“I’m sorry,” is all you could offer in a broken voice as your own eyes fell, and filled with similar glum emotions. “I can’t offer you a clear explanation as to why Ymir left, but I can offer you some comfort.” You look up at the same time she does. “As to your parents, just know you’re not alone. My father left me too. My mother…well,” you shrug, “I don’t remember her. Not even a bit, so I don’t think she was a good person worth remembering.” You offer her an assuring smile while you wipe off the water that dripped down your nose. “It hurts. I know, trust me, but you said that you and Ymir would live for your sakes right? Well, do it. No matter what.”

Historia’s eyes flicker up to you and she wipes the tears and raindrops off her cheeks. Her lips maintained her frown, not giving any indication if she would take the advice, but she did nod stiffly, letting you know that she was at least listening to you.

——

“I’m done cleaning upstairs!” You exclaim as you rush in the kitchen. “It took forever since no one helped,” you look at Connie. “But,” you sigh in relief, “It’s spotless.” You pull the mask off your mouth and let it hang around your neck, seeing Eren look back at you to address your comment.

“Good. Captain Levi is almost here. We just need this area here before we’re done.”

You swipe the bandana off your head and can’t help but smile sadly at a passing memory of Petra, Gunther, Eld, and Oluo in a similar cleaning situation. It’s something you couldn’t help but share out loud. “You know what this reminds me of?” You direct to Eren. “Cleaning with the Levi squad. The first one.”

“Yeah,” Eren nods slowly as his eyes fall back to what he was sweeping. His shoulders dropped but he hid what he felt with annoyance. “Only they knew how to clean.” His hands clench tighter around the broomstick and he begins to grumble. “Now it feels like we’re the only ones doing all the work.”

Connie shoots his head up and glares at Eren. “Hey man! Am I painted on the wall or something?”

You smirk and throw the bandana on the dirty pile basket. “You have room to learn.” Before he could add a snarky remark the door opens and Sasha, Jean and Armin walk back inside with the boxes of rations that had arrived.

“Hey!” Eren exclaims to the group, “did you guys wipe the dust and dirt off your shoes before you came in?”

“Huh?” Jean questions as he looks up at Eren whilst he sets the sacks of food down. “No, we didn’t. Can't you see all the stuff we’re carrying?”

You scoff at Jean’s comment and grab the canister from Armins hands to put it on the table whilst you watch Eren march towards Jean to complain further. “Do you seriously think that attitude will satisfy Captain Levi?”

You peek over at the duo and pretend to do something around the kitchen to continue listening to the argument—“If I hadn’t personally made your bed this morning—” Eren argues, making you snort.

Jean hears you and looks to you with a widened and almost horrified expression before his eyes snapped back to Eren to shout at him out of embarrassment. “Shut up! Quit nagging! Who are you, my mom?”

“We’re back.” Mikasa announced as her and Historia finally rejoined the group inside.

“Wait,” Armin protested, “were you just chopping firewood?”

You tilt your head and narrow your eyes on her. “I thought I told you no heavy lifting, and to tell me when you were leaving.”

“Gotta stay in shape.” She quips.

“You got grabbed by a Titan!” Armin shouted as he stepped towards her. “You should be in bed.”

“I try to stop her, but she won’t listen,” Eren interjects in a grumble. “I saw her doing sit ups earlier!”

You sigh and watch Armin follow after her to continue scolding her in his own gentle way before Sasha interjected. “It’s almost like we’re back in the Cadet Corps.”

“Yeah,” you nod.

“Why do you figure we were chosen for the new Levi Squad, though?” Armin can’t help but ask. “Protecting Eren and Historia is such an important mission.”

That was a good question, and one with many different possibilities, but only one you could think of, and Sasha said that for you. “Because we’re talented, I assume.” Albeit she didn’t say it in your exact words. Regardless, as she was answering Armin, she quickly shoved something in her bag that caught your immediate attention.

“Sasha,” you grimace, “what did you just put in your bag?” You turn to face her with a fuming and intimidating glare, but all Sasha does is slowly look up at you with an unaffected expression to lie to your face.

“Nothing bread-related.”

“Why, you!” Jean cut in as well whilst he stormed towards her.

You move towards her and snap back. “Give it back.” “Hey, focus!” Eren interrupts, “we gotta finish cleaning before the Captain gets back!” However no one really listened as you all tried to fight Sasha to put the bread back before said man you were trying to avoid getting upset, walked in.

“What’s the commotion about?” Levi broke the tension, creating a much thicker one as he walked towards the table, causing your shoulders to stiffen, and your angry expression to fall while you met Erens matching concerned gaze. And as Levi swept his hand under the table and dust and dirt fell from the wood, that concern turned to slight fear. Even more so as he lifted his hand and faced the group to address the situation. “I’m quite sure I gave you enough time.” Levi grabs his cloth from his pocket inside his coat and cleans off the dust and dirt collected on his fingers. “Anyways, we’ll discuss your lax cleaning job another time. Eren, Hange is itching to get the experiment started.”

As far as experiments went, you thought it went rather well for the first two hours. Eren listened well to instructions while in his Titan form, he performed all his given tasks well too and you couldn’t deny that he was impressive; he could write, he couldn’t speak because of the shape of his mouth, he could last a pretty long time, but only transform a few times before he seemed to go groggy and lose memory as his consciousness dwindled. The one thing he couldn’t do was harden himself like everyone wanted him to. It was weird, but there was an explanation, there always was.

——

“Huh? What was that?” Levi asks Hange after they and their squad walk into the small cabin, with their face contorted into distress and a hint of sadness.

“He’s dead…” they announce once more. “Pastor Nick. He was murdered. This morning, in the Trost District barracks.”

Levi’s face grows even more serious as the thoughts in his mind begin to churn, he hums and shows no remorse like Hange was. Instead he guided everyone to sit around the table and the couch beside it so Hange could explain in more depth what they and Moblit had seen, and what their thoughts were behind the bloody scene. And as they talked you grabbed the pot of tea you had made and served Levi, Hange and rest of the older Scouts before you walked back to sit on your seat. Albeit before you could serve yourself, Connie pushes his empty cup towards you, and quietly, and discreetly points to it so you could get the hint to serve him first. You smile kindly and grab the cups you set on the table to serve everyone but him.

Now you weren’t being petty, or anything. Not even because he was assigned to clean the table and didn’t clean it well the other day, causing you and the rest of your friends to get a long cleaning speech. No that’s not it.

Regardless you sat down beside Jean and across from Eren, feeling your mood go down as Hange continued with the heavy topic. “I figured the Church would want to deal with Nick since he was cooperating with the Scouts.” Hange explains, “that’s why I hid his identity and had him stay in the barracks, but….to think they would use soldiers to kill him. I was too careless. It’s entirely my fault.”

The room goes quiet for a minute, growing the tension thick enough that it felt as if you were carrying it on your shoulders. You tried to ease the tension, but such a grim topic was hard to brush off, especially as Armin decided to add onto the weight of the tension. “The military police…did they torture Pastor Nick just to find out what information he spilled to us?”

Levi sets his cup down and answers Armin in the same serious and unaffected voice. “Most likely. But it was the Interior Military Police, which means there’s something more behind it. So,” he turns and looks to Hange. “How many nails did Nick have ripped off?”

“Huh?”

“You saw, right? How many?” Levi asks, making you swallow thickly and tighten your hold around your teacup.

“I only caught a glimpse of him,” they answer, “but all the nails that I could see.”

“People that talk, talk after one.” Levi explains, “if they don’t, peeling more won’t make a difference.” Levi looks away from Hange, but continues, not noticing how you began to quickly tap the side of your cup out of uneasiness of the gruesome conversation. Perhaps it was something you needed to get used to, but fighting and killing Titans was one thing, talking of hurting human beings was something else completely. It was never part of your job, nor anyone else’s in the Scout Regiment.—“Pastor Nick…I thought he was an idiot, but. He didn’t turn away from what he believed, all the way til the end. In other words, they have no idea we’ve caught wind of the Reiss family. Though, someone in the government is up to no good, and their eyes are fixed on us.”

Right as Levi finishes, the front door opens and a soldier named Nifa, from Hanges squad, walks in and heads directly towards Levi to hand him a note from Commander Erwin. “I went to tell him about Pastor Nick, but he sent me off with this.” She shares while Levi reads the words on the small paper that made his eyes narrow deeper, and his shoulders stiffen much tighter. Once he finishes reading the note he looks up and urgently addresses the whole room.

“Everyone, out. We leave now.” Levi announces while he stands from his chair. “Leave no trace we were here.”

There was no moment of hesitance after Levi’s announcement, what little you all brought was packed in your personal bags. After that a blood pumping rush ran through everyone as you escaped the cabin to get to higher ground, and deeper into the forest where you could only hope no one was in. With the adrenaline that rushed through your veins you didn’t feel the chilly evening air, nor really catch that you had walked far until everyone stopped on a hill that overlooked the cabin getting raided by military police.

“That was close,” you breathe out while you tear your eyes from the scene down below.

“If we hadn’t left right then, what would’ve happened to us?” Connie asks with his eyes peeled back widely, expressing the shock and slight fear that ran through him.

You glance at Connie to answer his wondering question. “We would’ve been caught, Eren and Historia would’ve been taken and they probably would’ve left us for dead after beating us up.” You’ve seen it happen once when you lived underground, you weren’t supposed to see the Military police beat up a couple of young teens trying to take some food, or whatever it was they had taken, but Furlan, nor Levi managed to pull you away from witnessing the scene in time.

Nonetheless, Connie's head slowly shifts to you with his eyes expressing more horror after your words. His lips part, but all he does is inhale a small breath of air before you turn to check out the small patch of woods in front of you—you couldn’t apologize for your honesty that he hadn’t witnessed before, that he was blind to due to where he grew up. He had to know, those who didn’t know before had to know too. The world was a beautiful place, but life inside the walls also had their own monsters.

“But why?” Armin inquires, “what would make Commander Erwin…?”

“New orders came from the government.” Levi revealed. “There’s been a freeze on all Scout Regiment activity outside the wall. They’re telling us to hand over Eren and Historia.” At Levi’s words, you once again turn your head to look at him over your shoulder, feeling yourself full with buzzing curiosity at the new piece of news that just kept piling on.

“By the way,” Nifa interjected, “right after he gave me the message, the Military Police came for him.”

“They’re treating him like some sort of criminal!” Hange exclaimed bitterly.

“Someone’s not working from the shadows anymore,” Levi continued, “they’re moving for all eyes to see.”

“To go far to protect the wall's secrets.” Hange added while she faced Levi. “What’s more, why do they want us to hand over Eren and Historia? Not to kill, but for them to obtain?”

You clench onto the rifle in your hands and suggest, “Control?” You turn around and continue to add your thoughts out loud. “Whoever is deciding to finally come out and play, is no lowlife scum.”

Levi glances at you and nods, “you’re right. But,” he says as he looks away. “Who knows? Anyways it’s clear the enemy is after these two. Loitering around here is dangerous. We’re moving her and Eren to Trost District.”

“Why?” Moblit protests. “That’s the same place Pastor Nick was killed.”

“It’s worse to head towards the interior. With Trost in a panic, it should be easy to slip in,” Levi says, “and if somehow it comes down to it, we can use these in the city.” He pulls a side of his cloak and looks to his odm gear. “Plus, not knowing the enemy puts us in a tough spot. We need to find out who’s behind this.” he looks to Hange. “Hange, lend me some of your squad.”

“Of course,” they don’t hesitate to answer while they tap their chin and glance down for a brief moment, before once again facing the group. “All right, I’m going after Erwin.” They continue to turn to the man beside them. “Moblit with me. The rest of you will follow Levi.”

“Roger!”

As Hange climbs on their horse, Eren calls to them and hurries after them. “Hange! Here.” He hands them a folded up paper. “I remembered a conversation between Ymir and Bertholdt. Didn’t get to tell you, but it’s here.”

“All right,” Hange says as they grab the note and stuff it in their pocket while they climb onto the horse. “I’ll take a look at it later.”

“Be careful,” you wave at them, making them shoot you a faint smile before they ride off with Moblit. The rest of you being left having to walk through the forest as the sun set further by each passing second.

Levi led the squad, leaving you behind to eye the shadows that lurked in the forest that surrounded you. You wanted to distract yourself by thinking that running from the Military Police, and being seen as some criminal must be nostalgic to Levi since he left the underground to escape that life, but now it seemed it followed him here. Just like it also followed you, something he had wanted to avoid when he thought of making a life above ground. It’s funny how that works.

Regardless, the sun disappeared completely, taking away the security of its bright light and leaving you in a freighenting darkness that lamps couldn’t ease its eerie presence, making you walk closer to one of the people that could bring comfort to this traumatizing situation, Jean. “Why is it that we always have to move in the dark?” You grumble.

Jean glances at you and answers. “Because it’s better to hide in the dark. We aren’t as easily spotted.”

“I know,” you sigh deeply, “it was a rhetorical question.” Your eyes flicker over to him and right as you were going to meet his gaze you look up at the hat on his head, and you can’t help but smile. “I—”

“Don’t laugh,” he grimaces bitterly.

“I wasn’t,” you lift your hands whilst you meet his gaze. “Honestly. I was going to say that I like your hat. I think it looks nice. It gives off, uhmm,” you tap your chin and look ahead. “Cowboy type of vibes, or,” you clap, catching the brief attention of Armin and Eren in front of you, “some sort of a gangster.” You look at Jean again and tilt your head, noticing he seemed to be holding his breath and that his eyes had lost their intimidation. “Maybe that’d work better with a suit though, so cowboy it is.” You grin but he’s quick to look away. “It’s a nice look on you, Jean.”

Unlike Eren, Armin's eyes stayed on Jean and you for a moment longer to study your gestures, and hear the words coming out of your mouths. He could think nothing of it, after all he thought of Jean and you as a weird pair of friends. But he was quick enough to catch Jean’s flustered expression hidden under the hat he had on, and that set off a new curiosity within him that he wanted to further explore.

“Whatever,” Jean brushes you off with his head completely facing away from you, and his expression hidden by his hat.

You scoff lightheartedly and roll your eyes. “It still looks pretty ridiculous at night though.”

“It’s so they don’t recognize me,” Jean snaps.

Your eyebrows furrow and you snort. “Who's going to recognize you out here at night? The shadow man? A ghost? Or maybe a raccoon?”

Jean slowly turns his head to glare at you. “You’re about to become unrecognizable.”

“Oh,” you smirk, “I’d love to see you try.” You look to the front of the group and point to Levi with your eyes. Jean scoffs and leans closer to you to whisper. “Yeah, consider yourself lucky. For now.” He squints his eyes, “but watch your back. Cherry.” He mocks.

Your smirk deepens and you lean in closer to him too, holding his gaze intently and licking your lips as they tug to a smile. “Again. I’d like to see you try. Jean-boy.” Your eyes linger on his for a while, noticing that his lips turned to a smirk as he held his confidence high, not letting show the feelings that he felt fluttering inside. A tension rose between the little gap between you, but you were oblivious to it, unlike him. But he did nothing to point it out and make it clear to you, all he did was watch you blink and look away. After that you proceeded to part away from him and fall at Levi’s side. “Hey, Levi, so how are we planning to sneak into Trost with Eren and Historia? A big group will attract attention, and what if there's some dressed up Military police members in the crowds already expecting us?”

Levi glances at you before he looks at Jean and Armin over his shoulder to simply say, “I have a plan.”

——

“This is so, so stupid.” Jean grumbles beside you.

You shoot him a side glanced glare and nudge his arm. “Shush.” Your eyes return to the streets you’re marching through and they scan every stand open as you pass them, they lift to the roofs and catch the flags that hang from roof to roof sporting bright colors, your eyes search the crowd that is unusually big and clustered, falling from person to person no matter how young or old they are. One just couldn’t be too careful, you needed to look over your shoulder….it needed to become second nature no matter how bad that sounded. You needed to think as if every person that wasn't the Scouts, your friends and family was hostile, even if you hated to think that way of people.

Every person was against you until proven otherwise. Or at least that’s what Levi says in a time and mission like this. But it was so hard to think that way, especially when you saw the hungry and homeless people on the streets asking for food, or money after the destruction created in the city. And it seemed now there were a lot of those around, cities above ground were beginning to look like the underground, it was hard to see their sad and angry faces. So you had to put your hood over your head to avoid searching for those hallowed faces.

“So what, I can’t complain now?” Jean snaps in a sharp whisper. “He does that a lot.”

“Yeah,” you agree, “and it’s annoying. So shut up.”

Jean shoots you a brief glare before he picks up his pace to leave your side. And if it wasn’t for his undercut and his tall figure, from behind his wig would fool you into believing he was the boy he was pretending to be. Not the front though, you could pick him out in a crowd even with the wig on, he….had a very long one of a kind face.

“Try not to walk in a cluster.” Levi repeated to the group, “we’ll stand out. Eren and Historia, just walk normal.”

If he kept talking like that every ten minutes, someone would notice, no matter how far apart you’re all spread out.

“Why is the royal family’s flag hanging everywhere?” Connie asked as his eyes roamed the colorful flags overhead.

“Oh! Today must be the anniversary of the King's coronation.” Sasha answered, making your eyes return to look at the flags over your heads. “Once a year, they hand out a haul of rations.”

A man begins to announce what Sasha had pointed out, but your attention goes to the flower stand you walk by and your eyes get lost on the big, beautiful bright yellow sunflowers decorating the front of the stand. A soft smile tugs on your lips and a gleam sparkles in your eyes. You’re tempted to walk to it and buy some since they were your favorite, but you hold yourself back…as hard that was. It was such a brief moment that you didn’t think anyone would catch you, but someone did, they just didn’t say anything and instead admired your smile as your eyes remained on the yellow petals. When you pass the stand, you pull your eyes off the flowers and notice your group came to a stop, and before you could bump into Connie, you stop in your tracks and listen to what Sasha commented over the man’s announcement.

“What a king! He sure is generous!”

You scoff at her comment and before you could remark something, Levi beats you to it. “He’s got more than he knows what to do with. People are weak, especially when baited with food.”

“I have an idea,” you scoff, “they could take some of those rations underground. There's a lot of people who really need it down there.” You glare at the announcer as if he was the King in charge.

“We’re considered riff raff down there,” Levi replied to your bitter comment. “Or don’t you remember? They didn’t care about us, they still don’t care about them.”

“Yeah,” you huff out after you return your gaze to the path ahead. “I remember.”

The walk after that talk is quiet, uncomfortable and nerve wracking as no one knew when someone was going to attack your group and take Jean and Armin, or should you say, “Eren and Historia.”. Everyone had to keep looking over their shoulders and keep their guard up, only making yourselves more suspicious. Part of you believed you would get away without getting attacked, but you needed to for the plan to work. And it did happen as Levi had planned—“Watch out! Behind us!” Levi bellowed after he stopped and looked over his shoulder.

Before you could look back, you heard the speeding carriage racing your way that he had warned you about. As it sped past you, you jumped out of the way and had to hold back from fighting their attempts as you watched them take “Eren and Historia”. Yet you couldn’t help yourself from screaming out their names. “Je—Eren!” Sasha seemed to have the same trouble as she yelled out for Armin, but soon corrected herself and called out for who they were pretending to be. And even if you were going to save them regardless, the knot in your stomach wouldn’t loosen and you had to fight the urge not to instantly catch up to them. Really just run after Jean.

*A FEW MINUTES LATER*

“Calm down Cherry,” Levi assured you from behind you. “You reek of anxiety. We’re going to save them.”

You gnaw at your cuticles and take a deep breath. “This plan is shit. I can’t stand not knowing what they could be going through.” You lift your eyes and pull your thumb away to stand up as Mikasa joins you on the roof. “So?” You instantly ask her impatiently. “How is it going inside?”

“If we don’t hurry, they’ll see through Armin's disguise.” Mikasa informs Levi and you before looking away from your worried gaze. “And I feel bad for him.” She lowers her head.

Shit—you lift your finger to your lips and begin gnawing once more as you sink down on the roof, hearing Levi respond with a simple, “I see.”

“How is your leg?” Mikasa looks back at him. “Any better?”

You look over your shoulder, seeing Levi peek over his own before grabbing his knee and answering. “I can move well enough. It’s not bad, thanks to the things Cherry made for me.” He looks back at the streets below. “More importantly, these kidnappers…they’re nothing but amateurs. Why would they be using guys like this?” He stands up and takes a step forward, letting your eyes, like Mikasa’s, watch him carefully. “You both can handle the rest on your own. I’m heading for Eren. Once you’ve dealt with the trash, come and meet up with me.” He keeps walking ahead, assuring himself with the short comprehensive answer Mikasa gave him. “One more thing,” he stops at the edge of the roof and looks back. “I’ll tell you, just in case. Tell Armin and others, too. From now our enemy won’t only be Titans,” he pauses and looks away. “But other humans too.”

Your eyes widen and it feels as if all the wind had been knocked out of your lungs. You part your lips to argue, to interject with anything against his comment, but there was nothing you could say, even if you could, Levi left before you could think of anything. After that you tried to look at Mikasa, to see if she was struggling like you were, but she remained expressionless, and cold, or at least that’s what she wanted you to believe. You didn’t know what she was really thinking. She was a lot like Levi in that way.

Nonetheless, there’s a silence that falls over after his comment where you feel your whole body stiffen, and your heart sink to your stomach. Your body grows cold and a grim feeling takes over your anxious state for a brief moment where the silence feels deafening, and the question of “can I really do this?” Begins to linger in your head, making you nauseous. That question was brief before your mind was overridden by instincts that told you that you could and it was the right thing if it came to it, but your conscience told you otherwise. It turns you gloom and makes you stiff as your instinct, and your conscience battled with one another to have a winner.

Neither of them won. Mikasa interrupted you before the battle could be decided. “Let’s go.” She stands up to fly back to the other roof, but stops once you’re behind her to scold you. “And stop eating at your hands. You’ll ruin your cuticles.”

“Right,” you whisper as you pull your hand away and then follow her to the other roof to fall in your assigned position. When you hear the deep voices inside, you peek your head inside the open window, and prepare your fighting stance as you watch the floor and Mikasa down below. In the center of it all, you could see Jean and Armin tied up with their disguises still intact, which was something that should bring you comfort since they hadn’t been discovered, but seeing them in that position made you uneasy.

Regardless, their disguises were beginning to be questioned by the man leading the small group that walked in the storage room. “You’re sure, without a doubt, it’s Krista and Eren?”

“Yes,” another man nods, “they match the description.”

Yeah sure they do. Armin perhaps resembles Historia in some way, but Jean was not even close. They all sucked ass—you think to yourself, scoffing and rolling your eyes before taking a step closer to the window and meeting Mikasa’s dark eyes after they looked up to quietly signal you.

“Huh? Where’s the guard?” With that question uttered, just as Mikasa moves forward, you jump down the window whilst you take your cloak off and let it float down, while you land on the ground and look up at the tall startled man with a cocky smirk. He tries to reach for his gun, but before his fingers could even touch its cold metal, you jump to your feet and roundhouse kick him to the ground, instantly knocking him unconscious after a single impact to his face.

The other two men who had been up front freeze from the shock, and watch Mikasa and you wide eyed out of fear. They try to reach for their guns, but before they could think of shooting, and without a single word uttered between Mikasa and you, you both sprint towards them. She jumps off the floor and you slide down past her body almost as if the moves were rehearsed; she kicks a man with red hair, while you swiftly get up and swing your leg to kick the other man to the floor. He intended to move after, but he couldn’t even catch your fleeting figure before you pin him to the ground and twist his arm to his back, causing him to groan.

A faint proud smirk tugs on your lips once the thought of what you did registers in your mind, but it’s fleeting before you grow serious again. Instead of thinking too much into what you did, you look back, noticing Jean and Armin were tying up the other two men, leaving you to look up to a window on the roof to address the boy you knew was waiting by it. “Connie! Is it really just the four of them?!”

Said boy pokes his head through the window and confirms your question. “Yeah, that’s it! Nobody else in the area!” Connie finishes, keeping your eyes on him and not letting you pay attention to the man reaching for the gun he had dropped. Not until you heard the whiz of Sashas arrow impact the ground just inches away from your hand, and pinning the gun to the ground before he could try to shoot you. The crash made your head snap to the arrow, and made your eyes widened out of shock.

“If you move again, who knows where I’ll hit?” Sasha threatened the man whilst your heart pounded in your ears.

“H-hey!” Jean began to exclaim in an angry tone. “What if you hit Y/N with that!”

“It’s Y/N’s fault for taking her eye off the prey.” Sasha countered.

You nod and look back to the man under you. “Yeah, no, you’re right,” you interject. “Sorry! I should’ve known better!” You stand up and pull the guy up with you.

“All right!” Mikasa yelled out, “first, we tie these guys up, then we meet up with the captain.”

Armin looks at her and questions her command. “What do you mean?”

“Captain's orders, and he sends a message, too.” She shares with your friends what Levi had told the both of you, and they react in the same speechless disbelief as you. This time though, you fought with yourself not to think about it further. Instead you focus on tying up the man in your hold, before you place him with others in a deafening silence that had set in the storage room.

That was until you were done and spotted Jean with the wig still on his head behind you—“Eren,” you say seriously. “Are you okay?” You stifle a laugh.

“Huh?!” Jean exclaims. “What did you just call me?!”

You turn with your eyebrows furrowed in concern to continue with your act as seriously as you can manage. Which was going surprisingly well. “Oh, it’s you Jean. I forgot, you know with the wig,” you point, “you fooled me.” You shrug. “Sorry.”

His eyes narrow to a piercing glare and a venom laces in his voice. “You’re not funny, you know that?” He snatches the wig off his head and throws it to the ground, before he turns sharply on his heels to storm past you and leave the storage room with his chest puffed out in anger. His reaction makes you giggle and you have to run to catch up to him.

“Jean, come on, I was only joking. Just trying to ease the tension.” You smirk and try to meet his burning glare.

Jean scoffs. “Yeah, just be quiet, I'm not talking to you.”

You snicker and grab his arm, making him go instantly stiff. “Come on, don't be a jackass. I was joking. Of course I knew it was you.” You scoff. “I mean anyone with eyes would know you’re not Eren, even with the wig on.” You look away from him to look at the upcoming large doors, whilst you begin to list what comes to mind. “I mean, you’re much taller, your eyes are brown and his eyes are green, you're more muscular than he is. You’re—” you suddnely cut yourself off and feel your cheeks burn hot after you catch what you had been saying.

You glance at him nervously and pull your hands from his arm, missing the smirk on his lips that had swept away any anger he had felt. “Yeah,” you nod and swallow thickly and pretend not to be affected by the tension you felt fall over you as you look away. “It was obvious.” You clear your throat and begin to fiddle with your fingers as you change the subject. “Anyway.” Your eyes flicker up to steal a glance at him. “How are you feeling over what Levi said? I mean, I know I was just joking around, but I’m being serious now.” You throw the doors open and you both walk out the storage room with Sasha, and Connie in tow.

Jean exhales deeply and pulls his eyes away from you to look ahead at Armin and Mikasa. “I don’t know. For the first time, I really don’t know how to feel yet. I mean,” he pauses, and unfolds his arms to clench his fists at his sides and furrow his eyebrows to glare at the dirt ground. “They’re people…that’s not what I signed up for.”

“Yeah,” you sigh and drop your hands to your sides. “I understand.” You lift your eyes to the sky, managing to catch two brown birds flying past your head. “We signed up to save humanity. Not to fight them. I don’t know what to feel either. I wish I could. I wish I could talk…” you pause, and return your eyes to look ahead and watch Mikasa use her ODM gear to fly to a roof that overlooks the street. You follow Armin and her, and don’t finish what you had thought of saying. Was it obvious that you dropped your comment so abruptly? Yes. But you couldn’t finish it. “I understand.” You end up saying. Your eyes flicker to Jean and you offer him a faint assuring smile.

Albeit Jean didn’t miss what you said. He didn’t return your assuring smile, or nod to say he understood, he stopped you after you walked past him on the roof. “Wait. Talk to who?”

You instinctively want to reach for your wings of freedom patch, but stop when you remember that you weren’t wearing your uniform. It saddened you, especially because even if he was gone, his patch brought solace to your aching heart—“We’ll talk about that later, yeah?” You brush Jean off. “Just don’t give up on us, okay?” You peek over your shoulder and meet his eyes filled with confusion.

Jean answers with silence; no nod, no verbal answer as short as it could’ve been. Nothing but silence as he tried to understand the thoughts running through his head. He was assured that you at least understood his struggle of morals…he knew everyone else did too, but he was assured more with the fact that you did.

——

“Gunshots!” You heard Sasha warn. After you hear her, you look to the roof she landed on with Connie and Armin, and follow where her finger pointed to. “I heard a bunch of shots!”

“You two think something happened?” Jean asks Mikasa and you beside him, while the three of you watch the streets ahead.

“Most likely,” Mikasa answers much more bluntly, before she runs forward to jump off the roof before either of you could protest against her quick actions. It causes Jean, and you to share a quick look that spoke hundreds of words neither of you spoke aloud before he, you, and others followed the sounds of gunshots alongside Mikasa.

Finding the commotion didn’t take long as you flew the sky, Connie was quick to spot Eren and Historia, passed out in their newly styled carriage. Following after them, you spotted Levi—“it’s Levi!” You point out with short lived relief, because after you spotted him, and you and everyone else began to change courses to follow him, some thug flew past and shot at Levi. The thug of course missed, letting Levi pierce his grapple hook in the man’s chest to pull him forward, so he could also fly forward to swiftly slice the man’s stomach.

You were left speechless, stunned, and wide eyed after witnessing the bloody scene, but you kept yourself focused on the chaos you were now in the middle of. You had to.

“Chase the wagon!” Levi instructed the squad once you all got close enough. Albeit, Mikasa is the only one who answered right away—“listen up!” Levi continues after Mikasa. “They’re used to fighting other people! They already got three of ours. If we’re gonna get those two back, you can't hesitate! If you get the chance, you kill! Got it?”

“Roger!” Mikasa answered with inspiring determination.

Yet you couldn’t muster the will to answer like she did. You knew what you had to do, what the right thing was to avoid being shot, but you couldn’t wrap your head around killing other people. Mikasa seemed to be so okay with it, she didn’t hesitate to agree and do what needs to be done. And you admired that, envied her ability to not let her conscience get in the way when it came down to it. It would be easy if you were like that too.

“Armin, Jean! Secure the wagon! We’ll cover you!” Levi’s instruction pulled you from your train of thought, causing your eyes to slide over to watch Armin do as he was told, while Jean hesitated for a few seconds, eventually following orders, but just hesitating after witnessing another person being killed. And even if your stomach churned with the speeding thoughts of potentially having to kill someone, you kept flying forward with your blades slightly trembling in your hands, and your eyes bouncing from the carriage and your surroundings. And in that last moment your eyes fell on the carriage, you caught Jean on the floor and a woman pointing her gun at him as he sat paralyzed with fear and hesitation.

Instinct hit you then, like lightning striking the earth. There was no hesitation, your instinct shot straight through the battle of moral debate. Your eyes determinedly set on the pair, as your mind hit you with the possible outcome of what could happen to Jean paralyzed on the floor. And those thoughts didn’t let you fret to speed forward. “Jean!” Fear and panic laced in your voice, just like they vividly expressed in your face. Mikasa seemed to have the same thought in trying to save Jean, since you caught her also swooping down below. But just before either of you could swing your blades, you both heard a shot that made you both gasp and fly past the carriage.

The loud explosion that came from the gun made your heart stop, and your breath catch in your throat. You turned in the sky to face the scene, but you averted your gaze to avoid looking at the carriage where Jean had been. You didn’t want to look out of fear of what you'd see, you let the sound of the wind howling in your ears sound over your cracking heart. You wanted to turn away and avoid looking, avoid potential heartbreak in seeing yet another of one of your friends dead, but you forced yourself to look so you could witness the outcome.

Luckily heartbreak didn’t come this time though. Armin had been the one that shot first. It left Mikasa, you, and even Armin stunned for a few seconds, more so it left Jean alive and in disbelief. Not like you could rejoice over that fact because three thugs then flew overhead with their guns trained on the two in the carriage. They flew in fast and determined, having Levi get Jean out of the way, whilst Sasha picked up Armin just in time before the thugs could shoot aimlessly and manage to hijack the carriage.

However, determined to not let Eren leave, Mikasa began to follow them. Or at least tried with all her might, because after more thugs began to follow the carriage out of the city, Levi stopped her. “Don’t do it! Fall back!”

“But,” you protested as your legs twitched to move. “We can’t let them take Eren and Historia.”

Levi continued to struggle to fight Mikasa’s attempts to follow after Eren, as fear and panic had struck her heart like it had happened with you only mere moments ago. But unlike you, she couldn’t find instant relief in seeing he was okay, or getting him back to her, she had to stay with those emotions aching her heart, only being able to express them out in a loud cry. “Eren!”

It was a cry that made your feet move forward to try and chase after them. Albeit you also got stopped. “Y/N.” Levi called to you too. “Stop. We have to let them go.”

——

“…it’s okay now. That guy is tied up, and after today you don’t have to worry about him anymore.” Jean’s voice sounded through the echoing silence in the storage room. He had been talking to Armin for some time now; in a soft and low voice that you were surprised you could hear. While Armin had tears welled up in his eyes and his words barely came out in soft chokes. You didn’t exactly know word by word what they were sharing to each other, but you knew the context of their conversation, and it involved something a sick guy that had been guarding him and Jean had done to Armin.

It was upsetting to hear Armin so upset and affected by what happened, it made you want to help comfort him, but with your mind in shambles over the news you were all told, you weren’t a good person to talk to at the moment. You couldn’t provide what he needed, but it seemed Jean was patient, and sweet enough to try and comfort Armin. He was the only one.

“I’m sorry it happened, Armin. I am.” Jean continued. “He’s not going to do anything anymore, and I promise he’ll pay for what he did, for what he said to you.”

At the sound of Jean’s words you look away from the plate in your hands and look up at him to steal a brief glance. Noticing his softened, and worried gaze by the bright yellow light of the lamp sitting in the middle of the group, and seeing his hand gently grabbing Armin’s shoulder. And you didn’t know why, but you caught yourself smiling softly at the sweet interaction. Yes, you’ve seen him act kind before, he may act tough, but if you pressed the right buttons he could be soft, but seeing that now made your heart flutter.

The feeling was sudden, but you did feel it, and it was…weird? Yeah….Weird, but also not unwelcomed or wrong. Just weird because you felt it happen with Jean.

Moreover, while you struggled to understand what you had felt, you were caught off guard and got caught looking as Jean’s eyes flickered over to you. You of course proceeded to look away as fast as humanly possible, and instead foolishly looked down at the food in your bowl in hopes he wouldn’t notice. But you werent blind, or dumb, he obviously met your eyes for that quick second before you could look away—fucking embarrassing that’s what that is.

“Are you going to eat? Or are you going to watch your food get cold?” Levi startled you.

“No.” You snap your eyes up to meet his gaze.

“No, what?” He deadpanned.

You shake your head. “No. I’ll eat.” You return your gaze to your food and scoop some up, but just before you could bring the spoon up to your mouth, you drop a hold of the wooden spoon and once again meet Levi’s gaze to ask him a serious question. “Levi, is it,” you pause and sigh, dropping your eyes to your bowl once more. “…is it right to kill people? I mean we’re supposed to save humanity, not kill them. So is what we’re doing, right?”

Even if you were willing to…kill someone in order to save Jean, in that moment your mind and your body were fueled by this instinct. It was only because at that time your mind wasn’t a clustered mess filled with overthinking, guilt and hesitation, your mind was abundantly clear with what you needed to do. But now that you were sitting, the confusing mess in your head returned and doubled in size. You just wanted to clear your mind again, but in a different way with actual answers to assure yourself with. Even if those questions made Levi have to think of a clear answer.

He exhaled deeply and tried to answer your heavy question, but how could he give you a clear answer when he didn’t even know? He could lie and say it was so you wouldn't hesitate and end up the one dead, but he couldn’t lie to you, or any of his squad members. He promised you the truth ever since you were a little girl, he’s lived to that promise even when things got too difficult for you to comprehend. But he’s always had the truth even if he did sometimes avoid saying it. The only difference now was that he didn’t know what that truth was. There was nothing to avoid, there was just a disappointing answer he could give you.

“I don’t know.” He shrugged, and heard you exhale deeply with discontent. He wished he had the answer, but he didn’t.

You nod. “Okay.” You then sit in silence while you eat your food, not paying attention anymore to what happened around you until Levi broke the deafening silence moments later.

“What’s wrong? This grimy place kill your appetite?” Levi directed at Armin.

“No.” Said boy shook his head. “Jean, there’s something I don’t understand.”

Jean lifts his head and queries. “What’s that?”

“When I shot that gun to save you. I honestly thought I didn't make it in time.” Armin shared, “sorry, but why was I the one who shot first?”

You lift your head and lift your eyes to look at Jean, seeing him lower his head, and squeeze his eyes shut as his breath trembled while he remembered what happened. “That’s…”

“Because the other person hesitated,” Levi interjected. “It’s true.”

Jean’s eyes flew open and widened from the disbelief he felt at the sound of Levi’s words. He was quick to lose the surprise and instead grow serious. Even if you caught the falter in his voice. “Armin, I’m sorry…I should’ve done what I had to do.”

“I know what it is,” Armin spoke glumly. “The person that I killed…I bet they were a nice person. Someone that was much more human than I am. I pulled the trigger so easily…I did…I’m—”

“Armin,” Levi cut him off. “You’ve got blood on your hands now. You can’t go back to who you were.”

“Why would you say that?” Mikasa remarked.

“Embrace the new you.” Levi continued, “just think, if your hands were still clean…Jean wouldn't be here right now.” He paused for a moment to let silence fill the space so Armin and everyone else would understand his words. “I’ll tell you why you pulled the trigger…Because your comrade was about to die. Armin. Thanks to you getting blood on your hands, nobody on our squad ended up dead. Thank you.”

“Captain Levi.” Jean chimes in after, his eyes facing the light before him and his eyebrows furrowing and losing the uneasiness that were expressed in his face before. “I thought it was wrong to be fighting other humans. And wrong for you to order us to do it. I was afraid to be hurting other people. But…I’m the one who was wrong. Next time. I’ll shoot.”

“I never said anything about who was right, or wrong.” Levi countered, making your eyes drift over to him. “I don’t even know myself. Are you really the one in the wrong?” Levi briefly met Jean’s gaze that proceeded to widen right as he let out a shocked gasp. Neither of them said anything else on the matter, Levi left it at that before he stood up. “Now then, it’s about time we hear what he has to say.” Levi refers to the man you had taken down earlier today, a man you caught now, was Dimo Reeves.

Albeit before you could listen to the rest of the interrogation, Sasha returned inside and tapped your shoulder to gain your attention, “your turn. It should be quiet since the sun is setting.”

“Right.” You sigh and turn to head out. “I saved you some soup I made.” You point to the shitty dented pot on a box. “Eat up.”

Sasha grinned and then sped off past you to do as you said without an ounce of hesitation, letting you proceed to walk off outside and take your guarding post in silence.

Even if you knew time in this place was going to come to an end soon, Levi didn’t want to take any risks and be suddenly attacked, so he assigned a guardwatch outside the storage doors. And honestly even if you were out alone, whilst the sun left and the darkness of the night came, you didn’t mind being outside, it left you with time to think.

What's wrong?—you look up to the beautiful, fierce orange and yellow painted sky, and lean your head back on the brick wall—what’s right? I wish there was a clear answer, or at least something besides “I don’t know.”—It’s not as simple as what you wanted, but it would be something you could wrap your head around and understand.

It would be something.

You exhale deeply and drop your head to look at the dirt ground below your feet. Finding solace in the silence under the evening sky, until your peaceful silence was broken by a sudden long, and sharp whistle that sounded from an alleyway across from you.

“Hey, look at you.” A husky voice then broke through, causing you to snap your head up and look at the alley way. Spotting no one. Yet. “You’ve grown, baby Uri.”

Your eyes narrow on a figure that formed now that it was closer, and your hands wrapped around your hilts. “Now, now.” The voice scoffs. “Has that runt of yours not told you not to bring blades to a gunfight?”A bright gleam shines in the alleyway after the light of a nearby lamp hits the shotguns in the person's hands.

Under the light, you could also distinguish the figure stopping just at the end of the alleyway. You recognized that it was a tall, slim, intimidating old man with a hat on his long hair, and his eyes focused on you while his lips turned to a smirk. You intended to step back, but he pointed his gun at you before you could think of running to get Levi.

“Go in, or shout and I’ll tell my comrades to jump in and kill everyone inside. Be a good girl and stay quiet.” The man threatened.

Instead of showing fear; something you deeply felt in your bones at the moment, you instead narrow your gaze to a glare and lower your voice to a cold, intimidating tone. “Who the fuck are you?”

The man stepped forward and snickered, shaking his head and the shotgun in his hand. “Tsk. Now is that any way to talk to your papa?”

Your attempts at being intimidating, cold and unbothered dropped as everything went completely still and quiet. All except for the sound of your in disbelief grumble. “What?”

.

.

.

Tagged- @expectoscamander @greenygreenland @that-soft-lesbian-friend @dai-tsukki-desu @usernamehere91 @avocadopoosae @romancried @victor-criss-bish @moo-moo-meadow

#attack on titan #cherry #attack on titan fanfiction #Jean kirstein #attack on titan season 3 #shingeki no kyojin #jean kirstein fanfiction #jean kirstein x reader #jean kirstein x you #jean kirstein imagines #Jean kirstein imagine #attack on titan fanfic #aot #aot fanfiction #aot imagine #attack on titan imagines #mikasa ackerman #sasha braus #Armin Arlert #hange zöe #moblit berner #Levi Ackerman #levi ackerman x platonic!reader #jean kirschtien #shingeki no kyojin fanfiction #snk Jean #fanfiction #snk

[heylookitsyc]

Bad Breaks and Pancake Dates

Pairing: 2p!Canada/Matt Williams x Reader

Anime: Hetalia / 2p!Hetalia

Genre: Angst/Fluff

Synopsis: Your boyfriend (well, now ex-boyfriend) left you out in the rain, and your older brother Philippines is stuck in a World Meeting between the first and second player countries. He asks Canada’s second player to come get you, seemingly unaware of the Canadian’s little crush on you.

Warning(s): Swearing, slight mentions of a toxic/unhealthy relationship

Note: Just a reminder that none of you deserve to be in an unhealthy relationship !! You all deserve to be happy, and I wish you all nothing but happiness and good health in your lives (´･ᴗ･ ` ) please enjoy!

Story is down below!

~

You hugged yourself in a weak attempt to stay warm, the trees above you doing little to defend you from the rain.

It was difficult to tell if the drops running down your cheeks were from your own tears or the rain. You didn’t expect it to rain; it was supposed to be a fun day out with your boyfriend, so you had dressed in some of your best attire. Unfortunately, it did little to protect you from the rain.

After breaking it off with you, your asshole of a now ex-boyfriend had left you off at the side of the road. He had responded to your protests with a few not so kind words before driving off, leaving you to stand outside in the cold.

Your phone rang, and with slightly numb fingers you managed to press the “answer” button before holding it up to your ear.

You were met with Matt’s gruff voice. “Hey, where are you?” 

“I don’t know,” you said weakly. “There aren’t any street signs nearby.”

“Can you send me your location?”

“I think so.”

“Alright.” You heard the sound of a vehicle starting up. “I’ll be there in a few minutes. Your brother sent me to come get you.”

“Oh. Thanks, Matt.”

He simply gave a small grunt in response before hanging up, leaving you to yourself once more.

~

You stared out the window mindlessly. Music played from the radio, the volume too low for you to know what kind of tune it was. Matt had given you a spare sweatshirt that he had in the backseat of his car; you noticed that it was the same sweatshirt that you had given to him one Christmas. You could smell the faint scent of maple syrup and cigarette smoke coming from the article of clothing.

A small smile formed on your lips. You remember how Matt was when you had given him the sweatshirt; his face had become a bright red, muttering something about how stupid your gift was. He had said that he would never wear such a thing, but that obviously turned out to be a lie.

Matt suddenly cleared his throat, bringing you out of your thoughts.

“So what happened?” he asked. Though he sounded uninterested, the glance he gave you showed the complete opposite. “You were crying when I arrived.”

You felt your cheeks warm at his statement. “You noticed that?”

“Of course I did. You don’t usually look that unhappy.”

“I guess.” You fiddled with the sweatshirt, taking notice of how the sleeves fell well past your fingertips. With a small sigh, you decided to tell him. “My boyfriend broke up with me.”

You didn’t notice the way that Matt’s grip on the steering wheel tightened, eyes narrowing behind his dark shades.

“Are you fucking serious?”

You were caught off guard by the Canadian’s response. You felt the anger radiating off of him, and it started to make you nervous.

“Yeah, I am,” you said, tugging on the sweatshirt sleeve now. “He broke it off when we were coming back from the movies. He parked somewhere, and he…”

You suddenly went quiet, letting out a shaky breath.

“He wanted to do some things,” you went on, after a few seconds had passed. “I told him I wasn’t ready for that stuff just yet. He kept trying to convince me, and eventually he got angry and… well, we broke up.” 

You felt your throat tighten, and you realized that you were now close to crying again. You felt a small nudge on your hand, and you looked down to see that while Matt still had one hand on the wheel, the other was now holding out a handkerchief.

As if sensing your confusion, Matt gave a small sound of annoyance. “What?”

“Nothing!” You quickly took the piece of cloth from him. “Thanks, Matt.”

“Do you wanna eat somewhere?” he suddenly asked. You didn’t know if you were seeing things, but you could’ve sworn that there was a faint blush on his cheeks. “We can talk more about this over dinner or something.”

You felt yourself smile at his words.

“Sure.”

~

The sweet taste of maple syrup filled your mouth as you took a bite of pancake. Matt had taken you to a local diner that he visited quite often; despite his initial plan to take you somewhere nicer, you had been quick to remember his love for pancakes. (“I haven’t had breakfast for dinner in awhile,” you had told him. “Let’s go get pancakes so that the both of us can enjoy!”).

“You know, I don’t eat pancakes often,” you said, “but these are great. Thanks for taking me here, Matt.”

“Don’t mention it.” He took a sip of his coffee, his attention on the stack of pancakes in front of you.

You took notice of his stare, head tilting slightly. “Do you want some?” you asked.

“I’m fine.”

In reality, he just couldn’t bring himself to look you in the eye. It didn’t help that he was so close to you; the two of you were sitting right across from each other, and he could feel your gaze on him as he spoke. It made him feel strange, to say the least.

The diner was mostly empty. A small number of tables were filled; it seemed as though some people also had the idea of having breakfast for dinner. It was mostly quiet, save for the double doors leading to the kitchen occasionally swinging about and the faint chatter coming from the few customers that interacted with one another.

“I still don’t understand why you didn’t order anything,” you said, stabbing another piece of pancake onto your fork. “You love pancakes, Matt.”

“I’m good with my coffee,” he said. He was about to take another sip of his drink, only to pause when you held out a piece of pancake to him.

“Here,” you said, smiling. “You can share with me.”

He stared at you in shock, the lack of shades allowing you to look into his violet eyes.

“Come on, Matt,” you urged. “I can’t finish these on my own, anyway.”

Knowing that you wouldn’t stop unless he gave in, he gave a small grumble before reluctantly opening his mouth. His cheeks were now a faint pink, and you couldn’t help but feel your own cheeks warm as you fed him the bite.

“I put extra maple syrup on that one,” you said. “I know how much you like that stuff.” You gave a small laugh at your own words, remembering that Matt had also poured some syrup into his coffee when he thought you weren’t looking.

A comfortable silence fell between the two of you as you continued to eat, occasionally giving Matt a bite in between his sips of coffee.

~

Heavy footsteps followed your own as you made your way up the front porch steps. Your brother had rented the house for a month; while the world meeting was held in Canada and only lasted for a day, he had rented the home for a month so that the two of you would have more time to explore the country.

“Thanks for today, Matt,” you said, reaching the front door. “I had fun.”

The Canadian stood at the bottom of the steps, not bothering to make his way up entirely. It was already late; he had to leave soon in order to avoid a lecture from Oliver once he got home.

Hands shoved into his pockets, Matt gave a small nod at your words.

“Get home safe, okay?” you said. “And message me when you do. I want to make sure you get home safely.”

You really were too nice. He watched as you took out a key from your pocket, unlocking the front door.

Matt couldn’t stop himself. “Hey, (Y/N)?”

“Hm?” You had been halfway inside already, and you turned to look at him. “What is it?”

“Your ex-boyfriend,” he said. “Forget about him, okay? He was a fucking asshole.” He looked off the side, and even in the dark you could see his slight blush. “You deserve someone better. Someone who’ll do things when you’re comfortable.”

“Matt…”

He didn’t have time to react as you made your way back down the steps, grabbing him by the front of his flannel in order to pull him down. He felt a slight pressure on his cheek, and his eyes widened at the realization that you had kissed him.

“Thank you,” you said softly.

He couldn’t do anything but stare as you let go of his shirt and headed back up the stairs, giving him a small wave before disappearing into the house.

After a few seconds of standing there, Matt shook his head and began to make his leave, unaware of the fact that he now held a slight smile.

~

[Bonus]

“Ha! I knew it!”

“Kuya...”

Your older brother gulped at the sound of your voice, turning around slowly. He had been watching the two of you from his bedroom window.

You stood there, a smile on your face. Though your smile was usually sweet, the way you stared at him sent shivers down his spine.

“Were you watching us?” you asked.

Your brother gave a nervous laugh in response. “Aha, (Y/N), you know-” He didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence, for you had already thrown a slipper at his face.

“Mind your own business next time!” you huffed, ignoring his groans of pain and weak apologies as you headed towards your room.

~

Translations:

Kuya - older boy/older brother

#axis powers hetalia #hetalia #2ptalia #2p!hetalia #2p hetalia #2p canada #2p!canada #2p canada x reader #canada x reader #2p!canada x reader #matt williams #matthew williams

[pyjamac]

aiweirdness’s halloween botober prompts expanded upon by archivistbot. enjoy!

1. Howling canine ghosts scale the cathedral town pillars,

And the bones of the past their rusty shears.

Above a rattling rain the sky is black,

And the lights of the city flicker and die.

2. Leaves shaped like pumpkins litter the sidewalks, the season painting them in a sickly halo of vibrant red and orange. A woman walks past, holding a baby. The baby is covered in hands, faces, and arms, each with a different size, the arms twisted at a strange angle to the curve of the head.

3. Spiderwebs grow luscious on wet pumpkin grins. Have you ever seen how mesmerizing it is to watch the mummified body of the fruit transform into a spindly, wrinkled, new form? Amazing!

4. 'Thank you' trees lean out of residences, and the roofscapes are often barely visible from the high summer heat, it’s easy to miss the outlines of the structures here. The roads become dirt, the hedges are overgrown with shrubbery and the buildings sit there, too, tangled together. The contrast is made more stark by the uneven palletisation of these structures.

5. Black insects settle leaves and twigs over the damp patches of damp earth, and the lightless, empty sky of the city is punctuated by the dull glow of new suns.

6. Mouth mouth mouth mouth mouth mouth, the dead sea air pressing in on all sides, while the sun is in the sky, the sun is up in the sky, and the world is round the world, and the sea is forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever, forever

7. Snaking cobwebs mass on stalks of dead grass and wriggling through his open mouth, Philip Jennings looked up. He saw what was inside. Was it the end of him? Was it the end of everything? The level of abstraction that the nothing that floats above the level of reality?

8. Red eyeballs hit backlit branches, and a warm blue light spilled through from the open window. I could hear Dennis whispering to himself, softly to himself, that he’d done something right.

9. Wet forest steps on soft squirrel skins. There are no lights here, but the moon is bright, and casts everything in a sickly yellow. The only sound was the click of a boltgun against the barrel, and the sound of the bolt firing as the gun whistled its deadly message.

10. Murmurous forest insects smell caramel apples, creeping and twitching through the damp earth where the treat was dropped. They move slowly, unsteadily, and there is a sharp, snapping screech as they swoop down. They kill slowly, but they kill.

11. Haunting trees grow cuter on lighter dirt, and the sky turns a sickly pink. I can hear my father in the distance now, and see the patches of scorched wood where he’s buried. I can hear his voice, though it isn’t entirely clear what it is commanding me to do.

12. Planet-sized moon speaks 'hello' to us in a language we barely understand, but it seems to have good reason for its appearance.

It is a world I lived in for nearly two decades now, and it is a world I will continue to see in all my fondest, most abiding memories. A world so cold upon the shore, so empty, and yet so beautiful. A world so full of death, and yet so alive. A moon so bright and beautiful upon the sky.

13. The night sky kisses blood oranges lined with white and blue and red. I can see a small group of figures moving in the sky, slowly but surely gaining scale. Their movement is slow and, if not for the jagged edges of their weapons they might pass for human. Their eyes are a blur, and their smile is nothing but teeth.

14. Headless animals shiver in their sleep, and the world writhes on the edge of a precipice. You walk along, your boots crunch soft straw in the pen, and your shoes are stained with blood.

15. Mustaches creep creepily around his apartment, his neighbors started to notice that it left his face every night.

16. Slouching gargoyles lay spooky stones by the door, and the kitchen was decked out in a varied selection of fire.

17. Something is sitting in the center of the spectre tapestries. It is the thing that waits for those who would lose their way, and it is the one that plays its tune.

It is the one that begins in the quiet of the forest and reaches out into the very marrow of the world. It is the one that is not a thing, but is all that is, and which holds the answer to the question, How is it that I can love you? And if I cannot, what am I to do?

I see you in my dreams, and you would not hear me. But I know you, so I ask you. Are you there?

I ask you, are you there?

18. The unseen graveyard stretches for miles, far beyond the shore. And in the quiet that follows, the funeral dirge of that land sings.

19. Deep-skulled jack-o’-lanterns smell the warmth of my nose as I inhale it, the deep, musky smell of blood and wool and skin.

20. This town is filled with orange dust, cluttering the street and obscuring the sun.

And in the middle of the town, where the roads once met, there’s only one street: the one that goes right up to the house where the Reverend lives.

It is that street that leads out of the town, and down the steep incline where the ground oozes whenever the Reverend walks. It is that street that I now see, and that is where I will follow.

I will follow it as it leads out of the town and over the edge of the cliff. I will see the house, and the footprints that lead further into it, and the blood that flows from the wounds that followed him.

21. Mist-sheep chew on tombstones, and I think I’ve got a soft spot for you.

22. A scarecrow cuts a pumpkin with a sharp scythe from a wooden block. She rides on top of it and looks over it. She sees something staring at her from the pumpkin.

23. The graveworm snatches out the eyes of strangers who come by and threatens them in language that no one understands. The hunger is in its mouth, and it smiles as it waits for those who will soon be in its teeth.

24. Mist lamps glow with circling green and orange and green and orange and green and orange and green and orange and green and orange and green and orange and green and orange… it’s like… it’s like there’s, it’s a, it’s a fog machine, or something?

25.Monsters crawl through alien fursona on the streets of Tokyo, and people come running begging for help. There are no monsters in this story, but people do make monsters out of each other.

26. Spooky house skulls peeking out of the dreamlike brambles, and I swear I saw the outline of a long, thin hand. It slowly stalked its prey, darting between them like a hungry vulture.

27. Gangly moonlit grave rabbits lurk outside the windows of the church, and I can hear the regular chirping of the birds outside.

28. Murder rats roam the streets below the buried Earth Church.

The sky is blue and seeps with an invisible sickness; the chill of the November air is still in your bones, and you are wrapped in a thin blanket of damp. The churchyard smells of rot.

29. A shrub plays the banjo from the shadows, and the tune is as old as the hills, and it is the mood that suits me, as it is the harmony that makes me happy, and it is the song that I am. It is the only song that I will ever truly know.

30. Pumpkins melt quietly, quietly into the winter night, and the world seems to forget the rain.

31. The white skull leans out of the tower of the Palace of the End. The vacant blue skies of the prison are mirrored in the windows of the other side. It is an empty place, the last occupant has left it locked that fateful day.

#shah mac #as per request

[kafka-ish]

richie tozier gets off a good one | r.t.

“This was not to say Richie could not be very funny from time to time; he could be. When referring to verbal zingers and farts, Richie’s terminology was the same: he called it Getting Off A Good One, and he got off Good Ones of both types frequently...” -- Stephen King

word count: 3.3k

warnings/included: nsfw (explicit smut, oral -- male receiving, male x female, mentions of masturbating), fem!reader

a/n: pls enjoy ! 

-

It was a cold shower kind of afternoon as the thunder from outside Richie’s bedroom window roared loud enough to be mistaken for a dragon. Dragons don’t exist. Richie, however, ignored the booming sounds of nature from outside—his thoughts lost in a certain someone; and his ears muffled by the pillows encasing him.  

y/n was coming over for a study session at two p.m. sharp, per Wentworth’s request, but Richie still had time as his left hand traveled to the zipper of his orange, corduroy trousers. It’s not like Richie knew y/n. This afternoon, this shameful afternoon where if his dad were home right now, he’d be caught with his hand in his pants and a name he’d rather not talk about in between his lips, would be his first time meeting the girl.

Wentworth Tozier was the one to suggest she come over on this grey Sunday afternoon during Thursday’s family dinner when he noticed Richie’s recent report card.

“A C in chemistry?”

“The C stands for Chemistry,” Richie said with a smirk on his face. It didn’t seem to work because Mr. Tozier’s frown didn’t budge, and Maggie Tozier only sipped her coffee which had to be cold by now.

“You know we expect better from you.” He was right. His parents weren’t used to anything other than a line of A’s on the weekly transcript he brought home. Richie wasn’t either. But lately, something had taken a toll on his grades—or someone.

“You know what might help him, dear?” Wentworth looked up from the chicken he was currently cutting through. “A tutor.”

“I do not need a tutor.” Richie dropped his fork which was being used to play with his green beans.

“Your grades say otherwise, kid,” Wentworth countered. “You know, Maggie, I think that’s a good idea.”

“Not you too, Dad!” Richie cried out, exasperated at the scene playing out in front of him.

Ignoring his son, Wentworth continued, “In fact, I think my buddy back from Catholic school has a kid who could tutor him.” He took a bite. “Last I heard, she was fairly good at the sciences.”

“You should think about calling them after dinner,” Maggie said without looking up. Which was how Richie ended up with only an hour left to get himself off rather than the rest of the day.

Although his hand was no match for any of his previous hookups, it was faster, and it got the job done. He was just about to finish when the doorbell rang and a knock on his door startled him from his position and kept him from finishing.

“Coming!” Richie yelled; certain that the outsider wasn’t going to hear him. He stood up from his position on his bed, pulled up the trousers that hung from his ankles and trekked his way downstairs. His feet made a thumping sound as they padded their way down the stairs—roughly at that. He was surprised the house didn’t shake at his footsteps. “We don’t want your Girl Scout cookies,” Richie said, half annoyed that his session was cut early.

“I’m not a Girl Scout.” y/n held open the door with her hand before Richie could close it. She wore a white button down that was haphazardly tucked into a blue-green, plaid skirt. Her already see-through blouse was even more see-through, as the rain from standing outside for so long had drenched it from the outside in.

“Oh.” Richie didn’t say anything for a moment. “I didn’t order a pizza, either.”

“I didn’t bring you a pizza, either.” y/n was growing just about as annoyed as he was. “Can I just come in?”

“I don’t know about that one, toots.” Richie made a clicking sound with his tongue. “Pops said I’m not allowed to let strangers in.”

“Richie, please, just let me in,” y/n seethed. She didn’t have time for his bullshit and quite frankly, he didn’t either. If Richie let his grades take another blow to the one-inch margin, his C would threaten to turn into a D. “Your dad called mine on Thursday… I’m here to… tutor… you.”

Richie noticed how her voice had lowered and he could tell she was just as ecstatic as him for their study session. Wordlessly, he stepped away from the front door, allowing y/n some space to walk in. His eyes inadvertently glued themselves to her backside, watching as her skirt’s pleats swayed against her hips and the rain’s water trail against her long legs; a sight he’d swallow at and feel himself grow semi-hard to.

If all the girls at Catholic school looked like y/n, he might just have to transfer because just one glance at her made Richie forget all about the reason for his tragic C that stood for Chemistry.

“Where are we studying?” y/n asked. Her eyes darted around the place like it was foreign. It was foreign. Her hands clutched the book bag she held onto tighter, anxious by the new atmosphere.

“Is my room okay?” Richie asked, already starting up the stairs. His tone had gone soft, like when you microwave butter. He almost felt bad for protesting against the idea of being tutored just a few short days ago.

“Yeah.” y/n followed him, making sure to leave an appropriate amount of space between the two bodies.

“Do you need a change of clothes?” Richie said, not trying to cover up the obviousness in his voice; that he was obviously looking at her covered chest each second she spent turned away from him; that he had an obvious hard-on that he hadn’t bother to conceal under his ridiculous corduroy pants.

“No,” y/n said with a bit of uncertainty. Sure, she was soaking wet from her hair to her toes, but she wasn’t about to borrow one of Richie Tozier’s ridiculous band-tees that would wear like a dress.

“What’s with the get-up, anyway?” Richie smirked. Before he sat down, he pulled out an extra seat for her. Usually, it would be used to discard his dirty clothes on. Luckily, Maggie Tozier had taken the liberty of cleaning up before their guest got here.

“Laundry day,” y/n sighed while sitting down her bag next to her. She brushed out her skirt as she sat down so it’d cover as much of her bare legs as fabric would sparingly allow. Her skirt was drenched, and she was sure it would leave the chair just the same as if she stood up any time soon.

“Don’t have to wear that thing tomorrow?” Richie couldn’t help but think about all the other girls who’d be wearing the same outfit on Monday. Of course, their blouses wouldn’t be overly exposing, but their legs would still be bare and long—longing for Richie’s stare if you catch a drift.

“Aren’t you failing something?” y/n snapped back.

Richie swallowed the rest of the words lingering in the back of his throat.

“I was thinking we start with the basics.” y/n bent down, searching for the green folder she had marked ‘Science’ in thick, permanent ink. Richie couldn’t help but steal another look at her figure—outlined by the white shirt that clung to it.

“Basics?” His voice cracked, but he was too caught up in her to care.

“Well, what do you need help with?”

“Nothing.” Richie scoffed, not letting some girl he barely knew deflate his ego.

“Then why am I here?” She countered. Her eyebrow raised, unimpressed, and her fingers started to drum anxiously against the wood of his desk.

“Right now, we’re going over stoichiometry,” Richie shrugged, not bothering to meet her eyes—her bright, keen eyes he’d find himself lost in if he weren’t careful. “It’s not the math part I need help on it’s the—”

“Concentration.”

“Yeah.” Richie let out a heavy sigh. He already knew what y/n looked like—beautiful, while water droplets kissed her neck that he itched to touch. It wouldn’t hurt to steal yet another glance, he thought, while turning towards her. “It’s like I can’t focus,” he said, finally making eye contact.

“And you need help with that?” She questioned. The familiar feeling of anticipation welled in the back of her throat but there was no telling why.

“I guess.” Richie’s eyes left hers to stare at the wall. The view was less impressive, but it let him form a cohesive thought.

“I think I know a way.” y/n’s demeanor had completely changed by now. Richie was about to mutter out a how or what the hell are you talking about but the words in his mind scrambled together like the eggs his mother made that morning when he felt her hand travel down to his knee.

y/n’s touch was light and delicate—almost nothing as it grazed against the fabric of his jeans. But it was there. He felt it, and if he didn’t, his imagination must’ve been pretty goddamn realistic for running at a hundred hertz a minute. Her thumb ran circles against the corded pattern making his breath hitch.

“Uh, what’cha doin’?” Richie’s eyebrow rose at the hand on his pants which was making its way to the zipper.

“Helping,” she insisted, “if you’re having trouble focusing, you’re probably stressed, right?” Richie could only nod. “So, this will help you unstress.” He gasped at the sound and sight of y/n undoing his zipper. His eyes widened and she found herself smiling at his movements from such little touch already.

Richie was quick to roll his jeans, and the underwear underneath, to his ankles. His eager length stood hard and erect against his stomach and if it weren’t for his lack of social awareness, he’d be embarrassed to be seen bare in front of a girl he just met.

y/n’s right hand—timid but daring—wrapped itself around the base of his cock, eliciting a groan from Richie’s now parted and perfectly pink lips.

Surprise wouldn’t even begin to describe the swirl of emotions that found themselves in the pit of Richie’s stomach and began to bubble in his throat—another groan. Though, as surprised as Richie was, he couldn’t help but feel a warm sense of pleasure and yearning for more as he harshly swallowed at the feeling of friction and tightness y/n managed to spring upon him in one firm jerk.

She was on her knees now, the feeling of hardwood against bare skin didn’t seem to faze her. All her attention was on Richie. The sound of unsteady breaths from above had y/n’s cheeks flushed and panties in a heat. The only cohesive thought in her mind was wanting to hear those pretty little noises coming from Richie’s pretty little mouth again.

y/n didn’t need a mirror to know her pupils were blown, the sight before her that she couldn’t quite look away from and the uncomfortable feeling between her legs was enough, letting her realize what she was doing. What was she doing? Her grip on his length loosened as she moved her hand up and down, allowing for enough space for her mouth when she connected her lips to his dick.

“God. You feel great, toots.” It only took a few motions for Richie to already come lax at the feeling of y/n’s mouth. He wished it were another part.

y/n chuckled to herself. Having this much power over a boy made her feel… confident. No guy at her school would give her the time of day, it seemed—not even Jeremy Fields. But Richie Tozier… Richie Tozier was practically falling apart at the sight of her and y/n loved that. Richie felt her pace around him speed up and y/n felt herself grinding on her palm to meet his same high. The sight of her alone was enough to have Richie on edge.

“Sugar, if you don’t stop I’m gonna—” His heavy pants were enough to cut him off, but y/n took her chance to interrupt further.

“—You’ll what?” She pulled apart from him, a string of saliva connecting them. Richie almost whimpered at the warm feeling of her mouth provided—gone.

“I’m gonna bust before I can take care of you,” he admitted somewhat bashfully. His face was red, and y/n couldn’t tell if it was from embarrassment or the fact that he had been worked up.

“Oh.” Back at her shy state, y/n ducked her head and felt her cheeks heat in a similar fashion to his. “Well, in that case…” y/n didn’t have to finish her sentence for Richie to get a grasp on what she was saying. She began to undo the buttons of the thin, white button up at an unbearably slow pace. She managed to peel the wet material that stuck to her skin gracefully even though she’d been itching to take it off as soon as she put it on.

“Wow.”

“Shut up,” y/n mumbled mindlessly, not daring to make eye contact. Part of her was embarrassed enough at the fact that she was on her knees for the boy she was supposed to teaching qualitative chemical reactions to. Her skirt was next to come off. The plaid fabric fell helplessly fell to the ground as soon as she unzipped it.

“I’m serious. You’re like… hot stuff, hot stuff,” Richie said as soon as she stood up, giving him a perfect view. Her underwear was a scalding red with embroidered flowers that decorated the side of her breasts and hipbone. The matching set was far from innocent, far from what Richie would imagine Catholic school girls to wear.

y/n didn’t say anything—her stomach too full of butterflies and a lump still caught in her throat. Richie could sense her nervousness and pulled her into him. To think, a girl he had met only thirty minutes ago was now engulfed in his arms and half-bare for him.

The rough pad of his thumb drew circles on her shoulder. The slow, sensual movements against her skin was electric and had the two riled up even more as Richie slotted his thigh in between hers for her to buck up against. The feeling of her clothed clit on lace as she dragged herself back and forth on his leg at an uneven pace was indescribable.

“Fuck.” It wasn’t unexpected that Richie broke the silence and occasional gasps. “You’re soaked… so… fuckin’ soaked.” He could feel the wetness from her panties that dripped onto his bare leg and he groaned at the thought that it was because of him.

y/n giggled but the sound of her breathy laughs in his ears didn’t last long as she pressed into him further and latched her lips onto his. It was like no other kiss he’s had before. As for y/n, she’d be ashamed to say it was her first kiss. That is, her first kiss where she felt something.

y/n swallowed the moan from Richie as their lips still locked and their tongues swept over each other.

“You’re like—”

“You are, too,” y/n breathed quickly, not bothering to hear the rest of the words. Her attention was now focused on him—or the lack of him inside her. She grabbed his throbbing length once again, taking barely any time to admire it. “Do you have any?”

“Yeah.” Richie swallowed. He opened the top left drawer of his desk, revealing a box of Trojans which he quickly took a foil packet from.

It was weird. Although y/n knew this was just a one time thing she couldn’t help but feel jealous as the small hairs on her neck stood to attention.

Effortlessly, Richie tore open the foil and slid on the condom. “Ready?”

y/n nodded and bit down on her cheek as she sunk down on him. Patiently, Richie waited for her to adjust to his size and a sign for him to move.

A quick kiss to his lips was it. It was different from the first. Swift, sweet, teasing. Richie wanted more. He wanted more as he thrust up into her and he wanted more as he felt y/n’s fingertips dig into his shoulders through the fabric of his shirt.  

“Unfair that you have more clothes on,” y/n managed to speak through a whine. To which Richie opened his eyes and through hazy lids and lust-blown pupils he saw her panties that were pulled to the side as his dick met her entrance and the bra strap that was making its way down her arm.

Richie stifled a chuckle. “You want this off?” He gestured to the graphic tee that was basically draped over his slim figure.

“God, yes. Take a hint much?” She tugged weakly on the sleeve of his shirt and he pulled away for a second so he could remove it, revealing his smooth chest and delicious collarbone.

Another whine left y/n’s lips as he pulled her in closer again. His speed picked up as he bottoms out, reaching a spot no guy has ever found before. Her left hand his in his hair, gripping at his long locks that only a Rockstar would dare wear and her right hand is clutching his cheek—his freckle-sprayed cheek that relaxes under her soft hands and delicate fingers.

Richie’s hands, however, are in a much more intimate place he realizes as he moans yet again, this time at the feeling of his roots being pulled on. One is on her ass, keeping her from falling off, though it might be impossible seeing as how close the two are. The other is playing with her folds, using the same circular motions from earlier to coax her closer.

“You feel so good,” Richie says as his eyes roll back to his head. “Fuck.”

y/n hums. Her lips can’t help but curl into a smile once the words reach her ears. “I’m close,” she whispers and Richie nods in agreement.

It’s dirty and the total opposite of what Richie would expect from the girl who walked in his door a short hour ago, but they reach their highs together, while the filthiest noise Richie’s ever heard leaves y/n’s swollen lips. He watches her as she cums. Her hair is moussed and sweat shines across her furrowed brows. But Richie Tozier swears he hasn’t seen a prettier sight.

“Fuck, doll,” Richie says in amazement.

y/n’s still smiling as she opens her eyes, but she can’t help but be embarrassed at the same time.

“What?” The question is small, but there’s a certain weight on her shoulders that Richie notices.

“You’re hot.” He’s wearing a shit-eating grin and y/n wants to smack him right then and there. But she doesn’t. She only smiles back, quickly removes herself from him, and redresses herself with the same pace. Her shirt is only slightly less damp and slightly less uncomfortable, but it’ll do. y/n supposes she could just change into her pajamas once she got home. “What, don’t tell me our session’s over already,” Richie tries to joke.

“Sorry,” y/n sighs. Her backpack is already slung over her shoulder, she didn’t even need to ask Richie for help with her stuff.

“Hey, is this because…” Richie’s large palm finds a home on y/n’s shoulder which she tenses up at.

“No!” y/n’s barely able to choke it out. “But the session was, like, supposed to be an hour, you know? And I don’t want to overstay my welcome.” She’s back to her nervous self again.

“God.” Richie realizes what this is about now. “You’re not overstaying anything, toots. You can stay for dinner if you’d like,” he offers. “Hell, stay forever.”

y/n resists the urge to roll her eyes and opts for the dead skin on her lip instead. “I really have to go. Sorry, Rich.”

The last he sees is her half-smile from her all perfect lips before she slips out the door and into the rain again.

#richie tozier #richie tozier fanfiction #richie tozier imagine #richie tozier x reader #richie tozier smut #richie tozier fluff #richie tozier x reader smut #richie tozier x reader fluff #it stephen king #it 2017 #it 2019 #sorry i'm bad at writing smut

[wondernimbus]

excuses — fred weasley

pairing: fred weasley x female!reader

prompt: reader is dared to kiss a certain redhead. 

requests are closed for now. please refrain from plagiarizing my work!

She sighs, clenches her fists, and steels herself for the inevitable and incredibly humiliating moment that is about to unfold in five, four, three, two, one—

Standing on her tiptoes, [Y/N] puts her hands on his shoulders and plants a kiss on his cheek as fast as humanly possible. As soon as she does, she pulls back, fast as lightning, and hurriedly explains herself. "It was a dare—I was dared, no, wait—blackmailed to do this and I didn't wanna risk it so—I know what you're thinking, Fred, and I don't like you. I mean. Not in that way. And I'm not a pervert either," she adds as an afterthought, finding herself breathless as she takes a step back and clears her throat awkwardly.

For a moment, Fred Weasley looks just as surprised at herself as she does. And then he starts laughing, which makes [Y/N] feel ten times more embarrassed than she already is. Although she can't see herself, she is still very much aware of the fact that her cheeks have turned a bright shade of red—perhaps almost as red as Fred's hair.

Just so she doesn't have to stand there awkwardly, she forces out a few timid laughs. Fred grins at her. "I'm sorry, [Y/N/N], but that's a very poor excuse," he says, and though his tone is teasing, there's still that underlying tone of you like me, don't you? Or maybe [Y/N] is just imagining it. Is she, though?

She bloody hates having crushes.

She rushes to defend herself—albeit not doing a very good job at it. "No—" she sputters out, feeling ridiculously helpless as she catches the eye of none other than Ginny Weasley, who is standing a mere few feet away looking severely amused. [Y/N] sends her a death look that she hopes to Merlin sends the message across: "I'm never forgiving you for this."

And forgive Ginny she will not. It's at times like these that she horribly regrets ever telling Ginny about her little crush on her older brother. Ever since [Y/N] had told her a month ago, Ginny hadn't stopped teasing her every chance she could get. This morning, it seemed that the evil side of her well and truly came out as she threatened to tell Fred about her crush if she didn't kiss him on the cheek. (Downright evil.)

Not willing to risk it, [Y/N] had decided that a tiny kiss on the cheek was slightly more doable than having to admit to the fact that she liked him. Him being Fred Weasley: the tall, ridiculously attractive redhead in her year who she only started talking to last year when she'd befriended his younger sister, Ginny. Ginny had introduced Fred and George to her briefly, and ever since then she'd developed a friendship with them. She wasn't extremely close with the twins—their friend groups were drastically different—but they were friends: she'd wave to them when she passed by them in the hallway, they'd tease her about random things whenever they felt like being annoying, and sometimes she'd even help them come up with prank ideas.

But while she'd become good friends with both Fred and George, there had always something about Fred that attracted her in a way that didn't seem to fit the "friends" spectrum. Sure, he and George were quite literally identical, but Fred just felt—different. She'd feel butterflies in her stomach whenever he'd sneak up on her and tug on her braid, singing "[Y/N]!" into her ear, after which she'd raise her eyebrows at him and go "How can I help you?" Or when he found out that she loved strawberries and made it a habit to take her strawberry-flavored food whenever he snuck down to the kitchens. Fred was something else; something that made her feel like a blushing, giggly little girl. Made her feel unlike herself.

And so here she is, a few moments after making an absolute fool out of herself, trying to explain to him that "No, listen to me, Fred, I was literally blackmailed. Now excuse me while I cleanse my lips ferociously."

She turns on her heel and speed-walks away, refusing to look back. She doesn't even wait to see if Ginny has caught up with her—what's important right now is getting away from Fred. And perhaps never showing him her face again. Because if he hadn't known back then that she'd liked him, then he certainly does now.

—

"He knows, Ginny," [Y/N] moans, burying her head into a cushion as she flops down onto the couch. "He knows."

The Gryffindor common room is empty save for her, Ginny, and a bunch of quiet first years doing their homework in the corner. It's raining outside, and if she wasn't so busy wallowing in her own self-pity, she'd be basking in the peaceful sounds the rain was making against the window.

"No, he does not," says Ginny matter-of-factly, perching herself on the arm of the couch with her arms crossed. "I can assure you that Fred is just about the most oblivious person ever. I'd know—I'm his sister."

"You heard him," she moans again, her voice muffled underneath the couch cushion she's practically stuffed her face into. "He said it was a bad excuse to kiss him—oh God, he knooooows."

The group of first years turns their heads to stare at her, looking genuinely concerned.

Ginny rolls her eyes and shoots [Y/N] a reprimanding look, which she is completely oblivious to due to the fact that she has her face buried in a couch cushion. "Even if he has noticed that you fancied him—"

"He has—"

"—then good! I've told you this a hundred times already but I will tell you again just in case this time I'm able to get it through your skull: he fancies you too. Maybe even more than you fancy him."

"Sure," she mutters, prying the cushion away from her face to stare into the fireplace and contemplate throwing herself in it. "Your brother doesn't find girls like me attractive. He likes sporty girls—girls like, I don't know, Angelina Johnson—"

"Like you're not sporty," Ginny pokes her leg. "You're on the bloody Quidditch team."

"Yeah, as a reserve!" she throws her hands in the air, sitting up properly. "Point is, I'm not his type. Have you seen the girls he's dated?"

"Girl," says Ginny. "Just one."

"Whatever. She is gorgeous—"

"But he didn't fancy her. She was obsessed with George, George didn't like her—"

"And so Fred pretended to be George for two months."

Ginny giggles. "Exactly. George literally paid him, [Y/N]. Which means Fred never liked that girl—he was paid six galleons and two knuts to date her."

She scrunches her nose, an involuntary pout settling on her face. "That doesn't prove anything," she says sullenly. "Doesn't fix anything, either—he still knows I like him. And he doesn't like me back."

Ginny looks like she wants to smack her in the face. "You are completely mistaken, [Y/N]," and then, just to get the point across, "Completely."

"Am not," she flops back down on the couch, staring up at the ceiling whilst looking utterly crestfallen. It only takes her a few seconds of silence before she starts up again: "He knoooooooooooows."

—

[Y/N] trudges into the Great Hall the next morning with Ginny walking next to her, constantly throwing her reprimanding looks every now and then as though to warn her not to start moaning "he knows" again. Weirdly enough, she doesn't look anything at all like she spent the entire night moping over Fred Weasley; to anyone's eye, she looks as cool and composed as she usually does. She's done her hair, concealed the bags under her eyes with a bit of make-up, and she's ready for a normal school day.

Except on the inside, she is in shambles. Seriously—shambles. She's been mentally whacking herself upside the head since last night; why did she have to look so flustered after kissing him? She could have played it off better and pretended it wasn't a big deal.. she could have pretended she was under the Imperius Curse..

[Y/N] and Ginny sit down at the Gryffindor table. Fred and George are nowhere to be seen—thank Merlin. Maybe luck is on her side today and the twins have decided to skip breakfast. Or maybe Fred just doesn't want to be in her presence after she kissed him yesterday. "Totally uncalled for," she imagines him telling George. "D'you think she's gone bonkers? Bloody pervert."

There's a hand waving in her face. She blinks once, then twice. Ginny drops her hand back down to her side and shakes her head at her. "Are you still thinking about Fred?"

"No," she snorts. Ah, the liar she is today. Ginny makes a face like "sure" and [Y/N] regrets ever letting Ginny get to know her well.

Breakfast in the Great Hall goes about as it usually does, except [Y/N] is a lot more preoccupied with her thoughts and Ginny has to tap her on the shoulder a few times during their conversation to ensure that she was paying attention. When Ginny pokes her for the seventh time, she sets her toast down on her plate and says: "Okay. You know what—forget it," she slams her palms down on the table, startling the two fourth-years sitting across from them.

"It's not a big deal. Alright, I was being daft and I kissed him and may have potentially revealed the fact that I fancy him—so what?"

Ginny raises her eyebrows, obviously surprised at the sudden turn of events.

[Y/N] keeps going, talking more to herself than anyone else. "Even if he does know, so what? I'll get over him even though he is just about the only boy I find attractive in this sch—"

Someone tugs on her braid from behind. "[Y/N/N]," a familiar voice sings. "Get up, I have something to tell you."

The world doesn't just hate her—it despises her. She realizes it at this moment.

As much as she wants to dive under the table and pretend like a certain redhead isn't standing behind her, she knows that she can't avoid him forever. So she steels herself, turns around in her seat, and flicks her eyebrows up at Fred out of routine.

"How can I help you?" she asks, and for the most part, her voice is level. She hopes to Merlin that the warmth spreading across her cheeks doesn't show.

"I've got something to tell you, I said," Fred tugs on her braid again. She pulls a face at him; he grins down at her. "Come on, then. Get up. Up, up."

She rolls her eyes and meets Ginny's gaze—she's wearing an all-knowing grin on her face. Shaking her head, [Y/N] swings her legs over the bench and rises from her seat. Even standing upright, Fred towers above her by a good few inches. He's smiling, and George is standing behind him, wearing a suspiciously wide grin on his face.

"Don't mind me," titters George, taking [Y/N]'s previous seat next to Ginny and swiftly snatching her buttered toast. ("Hey, that's mine!" says Ginny, outraged) "Listen to what Freddy has to say. Very important. Oh, yes."

She narrows her eyes at George, then at Fred, who shifts a little on his feet. "Have you come to confess your undying love for me?" she says jokingly, ignoring the sheer panic swelling in her chest. You're okay, she tell herself. Just fine. Just keep up the familiar, friendly banter—act the way you always do—you'll be fine—

Fred tilts his head to the side, feigning a look of contemplation. "Something like that," he decides, a whimsical smile on his lips. [Y/N] raises her eyebrows at him, ignoring the storm of butterflies flitting around inside her stomach.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asks, eyeing him suspiciously.

Fred's grin, if possible, widens. He shrugs one shoulder, then says in the same casual tone one would use when talking about the weather, "How would you feel if I kissed you, [Y/N/N]?"

Her mouth falls open in surprise.

"If you what now?" Did she hear that right?

Fred grins. She stares at him, searching his eyes—"This is a prank, isn't it?"

A part of her almost wants him to say yes, that's he's just pulling her leg and this is a ridiculous joke he and George came up with just for the laughs. But he bunches his lips up to one side and shakes his head. "Nope," Fred replies nonchalantly, and then his lips droop down a little as a touch of somberness sneaks its way onto his face. "Would you like it to be?"

She opens her mouth to reply, but no words come out. She is—although this is a severe understatement—stunned. She has to be dreaming—there is no way this is real life and she's standing in front of bloody Fred Weasley, who has just now basically asked if he could kiss her.

This is not real life. There is absolutely no way.

But the way her heart is pounding wildly in her chest feels too real.

"You see," Fred begins, once more grinning craftily, "I wanted to ask for your permission first. Didn't wanna come up to you and steal a kiss out of nowhere like they do in those Muggle movies—like a certain someone did to me yesterday."

He gives her a look full of meaning. She purses her lips, warmth quickly spreading across her cheeks as she scratches the back of her neck sheepishly. "I already apologized," she says, averting her gaze. "And I already told you I was blackmailed into doing it.. and besides, it was just a kiss on the cheek!" she adds hastily, sounding a little more defensive than she'd been intending. "It could have been worse.. it could have been on your.." she trails off, a rather prominent pink blush settling on her cheeks.

There's a fond little smile on Fred's lips as he listens to her—one that she doesn't quite notice because she's too busy drowning in embarrassment. "Anyways, I'm sorry," she mutters guiltily, raising her eyes to look at him again.

Fred shakes his head, patting her on the shoulder. At this, it's her turn to send him a look of feigned irritation. He beams back at her. "There's really nothing you should be apologizing for, [Y/N/N]," he reassures her breezily. "That kiss was quite enjoyable—although I have to say I am a little offended that you had to be blackmailed into kissing me instead of doing it because you wanted to."

She stares at him, eyebrows raised as she fights to maintain a neutral expression. Meanwhile, the gears in her brain struggle to figure out where exactly he's going with this. Is he saying what she thinks he's saying—that he actually liked that she'd kissed him?

"You still haven't answered my question, [Y/N/N]," Fred reminds her, wagging an annoying little finger in her face. She keeps her eyes on his, trying to read him. Behind the mischief glinting in his eyes, she thinks she can see a bit of sincerity—cautiousness, as though he's willing to back off if she wants him to.

She purses her lips, a whole tornado of emotions unfurling in her chest. "I mean," she says slowly, chewing on the inside of her mouth as she ponders a response. She can almost hear Ginny screaming "Kiss him!" inside her head, but her voice is drowned out by logical thinking. She doesn't want to seem too eager, and besides, just because he asked her how she'd feel if he were to kiss her doesn't mean that he will, necessarily—

"I wouldn't be totally opposed to it," she admits finally, her fists clenching beside her as she averts her gaze to look at anything but the ridiculously attractive redhead in front of her—goddamn it, Fred Weasley. Unable to help herself she glances at him; his lips have curled into a small smile, one that grows when she meets his eyes. Flushing, she huffs, "Well, you asked—"

Out of nowhere, he swoops in and lands a brief kiss on her cheek.

Someone—Ginny or George or both of them—squeals from behind her.

She blinks, momentarily startled as her brain struggles to register what the bloody hell just happened. Her mouth has fallen open slightly, and she blinks again, swallowing as she tries to make sense of the situation. Fred, meanwhile, has the audacity to actually look sheepish. He ducks his head in an attempt to conceal the faint red blush that dusts his cheeks, clearing his throat before letting out a laugh that was meant to sound flippant.

"Still not opposed?" he asks, arching his eyebrows. There's a goofy little smile on his face, and the exhilaration in his tone of voice does little to hide his giddiness, but at the same time the way his eyes dart over [Y/N]'s face searchingly—trying to deduct how she feels about the events that just unfolded—shows his slight uncertainty.

And how does she feel?

She lets out a long breath that she hadn't realized she was holding, trying to calm the butterflies—no, scratch that—the entire bloody zoo that has been unleashed inside her stomach. And then, because she's lost all ability to form words, she lets out a breathless laugh, shaking her head as she looks down at the ground.

"Well?" Fred prompts expectantly, leaning a little towards her anxiously. "Don't leave me hanging here, [Y/N]."

She presses her lips in an attempt to conceal the jubilant smile that tugs at them as she raises her head to look up at Fred. Urged on by the giddy feeling swelling inside her chest, she juts her bottom lip out, feigning a look of thoughtfulness as she pretends to ponder over it. And then, shrugging, she grins at him, eyes twinkling—"That wasn't all that bad."

The uneasy, expectant look on Fred's face is quickly replaced by one of relief. He exhales, tense shoulders relaxing as he grins right back at her, the same bright, mischievous glint in his eyes. "How would you feel about another one?" Fred suggests, tone hopeful as he takes a tentative step closer.

[Y/N] fights to keep on a stoic expression as she shrugs. "Wouldn't hurt, would it?"

George and Ginny break out into a chorus of squeals as Fred leans in for a second time.

read pt. 2 here!

#harry potter #harry potter oneshot #harry potter oneshots #harry potter imagine #harry potter imagines #harry potter x reader #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter fanfic #fred weasley oneshot #fred weasley oneshots #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley imagines #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley fanfiction #fred weasley fanfic #fred weasley #weasley twins #george weasley

[clubyukhei]

in the mood for love (m)

pairing: wong yukhei x (f) reader

genre: fluff, smut, slice of life, some angst

summary: distance makes the heart grow fonder. in yukhei’s case, it makes him reminisce on all the firsts of your relationship and realise you’re the one he wants to spend the rest of his life with. (or: a long-distance relationship au where yukhei savours every moment of your short reunion.)

warnings: unprotected sex, language

tags: established relationship, flashbacks, set in hk, hendery and kunten appear, drunk texting, flirty dialogue, love letters, talks of marriage, pining, a bittersweet ending

word count: 14.6k

a/n: wow, it feels weird to be finally posting this because i’ve been working on this for months. this took way longer than expected and for that i wanna thank my sweet mutuals and anons who have been so patient and encouraging :’) i hope you’re in the mood for fluff and domesticity because this fic is full of it! enjoy! (reposting again bc the original one wouldn’t show up in the tags. tysm if you’ve interacted with that post btw <3)

--

heaven is in your eyes

bright as the stars we're under

oh, is it any wonder

i'm in the mood for love?

-

why stop to think of whether

this little dream might fade?

we've put our hearts together

now we are one, i'm not afraid

-

if there's a cloud above

if it should rain we'll let it

but for tonight, forget it

i'm in the mood for love

-- 

mornings like this are hard to come by for yukhei.

when the only sounds he can hear are the ticking of a clock and your soft exhalations. when you’re cuddled up to him, your face tucked into the crook of his neck where you breathe warm puffs of air onto his skin every few seconds. 

it’s probably just another one of those dreams that yukhei gets every now and then. the kind he never wants to wake up from, because when he opens his eyes, all he sees is the dull grey ceiling of his dormitory before his bunkmates’ noisy snores snap him back into reality. 

those mornings were the worst. yukhei would give up on going back to sleep. instead, he’d force himself out of bed to wash up and head to the canteen for an early breakfast, all while annoyed that his mind had once again translated his yearning for you into his dreams. he couldn’t help but feel like he was being mocked by his own self. 

but this time, it feels different. 

his back is resting on a bed that’s much comfier than the thin mattress he’s used to back at camp, and he’s awfully snug and cosy under what feels like a thick fleece blanket.

yukhei peels his eyelids open, ready to be met with disappointment again.

the first thing he sees is the sunrise peeking through the curtains, greeting him good morning with a dark orange glow — which is weird, because he’s always up before the sun is. even though his mind is still fuzzy, yukhei has an inkling that he’s not back at camp. so he lifts his head off the pillow and looks around. 

there’s a messy work desk between two huge potted plants; a wall fully plastered with polaroids and pictures; and a clothing rack with clothes that clearly aren’t his but it’s the bra hanging over an armchair that finally tells yukhei that he’s in your bedroom.

he looks down and sighs in relief seeing you in deep slumber next to him. you’re sleeping on your side with a hand absentmindedly resting on his waist, your head tilted as if you fell asleep while gazing at him. your eyes are closed and the look on your face is so peaceful — it’s an image that yukhei wants to keep in his mind forever. 

wrapping an arm around your hips, yukhei gently tugs you closer to him. your eyebrow scrunches in reaction and he panics a little, freezing when your hand lands on top of his. but you turn on your other side and snuggle back against his chest instead, and his lips curl into a lopsided smile at this tiny movement.

yukhei hugs you from behind, nuzzling into your hair and sighing when he gets a whiff of your apple-scented shampoo that he has missed so much. 

just like that, the warmth of your bodies wrapped around each other and the thought of getting to spend the next few days with you — in real life, not just in his dreams — lulls him back to sleep. 

-- 

yukhei would never forget the day he first met you. 

or the sight of you sitting at the back of his mum’s restaurant, sipping on a glass of iced tea as you stared out of the window and silently observed the hustle and bustle of shatin plaza. 

the fact that his usual seat was occupied and that a pretty girl was sitting in it left him speechless, but not annoyed at all. sure, it was his favourite spot. it also unofficially belonged to him, seeing how he sat there nearly everyday doing his homework — but that was years ago. 

yukhei felt like the universe had something up its sleeve when it presented him with such a scenario on a day where he finally managed to pop by his mum’s restaurant and pay her a visit. he rarely popped by on weekdays anymore because of how hectic his academic life was becoming.

“look who it is! our yukhei who keeps growing taller and taller!” 

yukhei smiled shyly as he stepped behind the counter and greeted the longtime staff — aunties who never failed to shower him with all sorts of compliments — and rushed into the kitchen looking for his mum. 

mrs wong was less than pleased when she saw her son, to say the least. the smile on her face lasted for a good minute before she started nagging about how he should’ve gone home to study instead.

“i am going to study! right after i eat.” he whined, shocked that his presence had irritated her so much.

“you always say that, yukhei. but you just play games on your phone!” mrs wong retorted, not looking away from the refrigerator.

yukhei gulped at that statement, unwilling to admit that it was quite true.

“mum, who’s that girl outside? sitting at my table?”

“your table?” she chuckled before looking up at him. 

yukhei watched her make her way towards the kitchen entrance to peek at the stranger outside.

“ah, that’s _____. she comes here often.” she said with a bright smile that even yukhei himself rarely received. “she helped us understand what the tourists were saying, talked to them in english for us a few times now. a very sweet and smart girl.”

if anything, yukhei became more attracted to you at that moment. 

maybe it’s the thought of you helping his mum out while he’s not around — he knew how rude and impatient some tourists could be with language barriers, having personally dealt with them several times — or maybe it’s just the way you entered his life that, for some reason, felt like an important moment to him. 

either way, he already made up his mind about one thing. 

yukhei ended up serving you the pad thai you had been waiting for, warmly introducing himself as the lady boss’ first and older son and striking up a conversation with you that went on longer than he had expected. 

he thought it was bad that he had to control his excitement when you suggested he take the seat opposite yours, but it only got worse as you both began to talk about everything and nothing.

when you smiled, he lost his train of thought.  when you laughed or so much as even chuckled, his chest squeezed around his heart and he wanted to keep hearing the sound of it. and when you listened to him, he had to look away because your attentive gaze on him was truly too much. 

by the time you were done with your meal, yukhei had your number saved in his phone. he offered to walk you out, opening the glass doors for you all gentlemanly as if you had just dined at a five-star hotel restaurant.

“it was nice talking to you, yukhei.” you turned to smile at him just before you stepped outside. “see you again, i guess?” 

“yeah, let’s—um. yeah, see you around.” yukhei stuttered pathetically.

you giggled and waved goodbye to him and mrs wong before heading off. the lady boss had been subtly keeping an eye on you two after her son insisted on waiting your table.

once you were out of view, yukhei sighed, cringing at how nervous he sounded. before you, he had never in his life felt that self-conscious in front of anyone.

“my dear, what was that?” his mum asked with a sly look of amusement on her face. 

yukhei wanted the floor to open up and swallow him whole.

“i don’t know, mum.”

all he could think about was seeing you again. 

-- 

when yukhei wakes up again, he’s alone in bed. 

the midday sunlight glares into the room and shines on the empty spot next to him, prompting him to roll away and further into the shade. 

he lies on his side, watching some plant-shaped shadows sway across the wall for a minute before forcing himself out of bed. those extra hours of sleep did wonders for his circadian rhythm and for once he doesn’t feel tired to be awake at all — just bummed that he woke up with you not in his arms.

something in the air shifted after last night. yukhei couldn’t get over the way you jumped into his arms when he appeared at your doorstep, or how you got emotional at his shaky confession as he presented you with the promise ring he had been keeping for so long. 

he had been craving for your presence so much over the past few months that seeing you reciprocate those feelings made him relieved and somewhat clingy. all he wants is to stick by your side every second he has with you before he leaves again. 

so he gets out of bed immediately, walking into your tiny living room where he hears the sound of running water and finds you leaning against the kitchen counter with your back facing him, busily tending to the roses he had gifted you last night. 

yukhei makes his way to you fast. his hands sneak beneath your oversized t-shirt and around your waist, pulling your frame against his front as he places a kiss on your temple. 

“morning,” you say, relaxing into his touch and reaching for the nape of his neck with one hand to tug his face closer to yours. 

yukhei hums in satisfaction when you angle your face perfectly to lock your lips with his in a tender kiss and whines when you attempt to pull away. he wants to taste your lips for a little longer, he’s far from done and you know it too. 

you turn around to face him properly, abandoning the stalks of roses that had your attention earlier. a gasp escapes you when he slides his hands down to your bum and swiftly lifts you onto the counter.

“missed my baby so much,” he mumbles against the juncture of your jaw and neck, relishing in your soft sighs by his ear. 

he doesn’t miss the way your legs hook around his waist to pull him closer or the way your fingertips lightly scratch his scalp as he busily sucks at your skin, determined to leave a trail of love marks for his own appreciation. 

the doorbell rings just as he’s licking over his masterpiece, rudely interrupting the moment. 

“yukhei.” you squeeze his shoulders and yukhei forces himself to pull away.

“who’s that?” he asks, unable to hide the tone of disappointment in his voice. his hands refuse to leave your skin, his thumb gently caressing the curve of your underboob.

you giggle at his pouty lips before adjusting the short bangs hanging over his forehead that he hated despite the many times you told him he looked cute.

“i ordered brunch for us.” 

dumbfounded and still in a half-asleep state, yukhei helps you off the counter. he watches you look into the peephole before opening the door and picking up a large paper bag that had been sitting on your doormat.

“i thought you’d be hungry after waking up.” you say, setting the bag into your small dining table for two. “i hope you don’t mind, bub. i didn’t want to cook anything because, well—i can’t. i haven’t been to the grocery store this week. but we can always head there later and get stuff for the next few days.”

yukhei lets out a huff of disbelief. “baby.” 

but you don’t hear him. you’re so busy unpacking the small food boxes onto the table as you ramble on and on, oblivious to the way he was staring at you in adoration.

“i got you your favourite stuff. spring rolls, shu mai—what?” 

at last you notice how quiet he has been and you freeze, looking at him with your eyes wide in concern. 

“sit down and let me do the work, please.” yukhei pleads, dragging a chair out. “you did all that while i did nothing and slept like a log!” 

you laugh, shaking your head as you sit down. “i just dialed a number and asked for some food. and i know you really needed that sleep.”

once all the food boxes are arranged neatly on the table, yukhei takes his seat next to you. you’re in the midst of reaching for a pair of chopsticks when his hand grabs onto yours, halting your movements.

there’s a moment of silence as you curiously watch him readjust his thumb below the joints of your fingers, bringing the back of your hand towards his lips.

“thank you, baby. i love you.” he tells you with a dazed smile, placing a kiss just above where the promise ring hugs your finger. 

“you’re welcome.” 

you tell him you love him too before you bite back a huge smile — the kind that satisfies yukhei so much because he knows he’s the reason behind it.

--

yukhei couldn’t put into words how elated he was when you texted him back a few days after your slightly awkward first meeting, agreeing to hang out with him that upcoming friday night.

truth be told, there weren’t any concrete plans for your first date. it was amusing to him really, how the conversation ended right after you both settled on a meeting place, with no discussions of what to do or where to eat.

maybe you were simply excited to see him again and didn’t really care about what the plan was — because that was exactly how yukhei felt. 

the bus ride to the shopping mall felt longer than usual. yukhei found himself staring at his reflection in the window a few times, adjusting the sleeves of his jacket and making sure he looked good.

he had rushed home straight after javelin practice and taken the quickest shower of his life before spending a good amount of time styling his hair. it was not the wisest idea — choosing a late school day when there were six other days in a week where he wouldn’t have to rush — but he had been merely trying his luck when he sent that message asking if you were free. he wasn’t expecting you to actually say yes. 

so when he spotted you waiting all by yourself from afar, he quickened his footsteps amidst the crowd, never taking his eyes off of you. 

your face lit up as soon as you saw him and you waved, the crop top you wore lifting a little. yukhei’s gaze flew to the sliver of skin exposed and the nervousness that had been bubbling in his tummy earlier instantly melted into nothing.

the night went quite smoothly. yukhei could not have enjoyed himself more, from dinner at the sushi bar you had recommended to the impromptu movie session that had the both of you sharing the only available seat left: a couple seat. 

he was falling harder as he got to know you more and it scared him just how fast it was happening.

“do you watch superhero movies a lot?” you asked as the two of you turned into another alley of food stalls. 

yukhei had insisted on accompanying you back to the train station after the movie as it was getting late. he was not going to leave you alone when nightlife in the city was just starting, not when the streets were bound to get rowdy. 

“not really. i mean blockbusters are nice but i love old dramas and action flicks, you know?” yukhei answered, turning to look at you in his jacket that had been on you since he noticed you shivering in the cinema. he couldn’t help but smile at how your fingertips were peeking beneath the long sleeves.

“wait, me too!” you gasped, turning to look at him with a huge smile. “why didn’t you stop us from watching iron man?” 

“well you suggested it so i thought you really wanted to watch it!” yukhei laughed as he scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. “i’m sorry.” 

“no, that’s my bad. i didn’t know what you liked so i just picked something popular.” you rolled your eyes playfully. “maybe we can watch the great gatsby next time. i think we might enjoy that.” 

next time?

it took yukhei a few seconds to acknowledge the idea of a second date that you had brought up so casually.

“r-really?” he cringed as the single word fumbled through his lips.

“yeah?” you replied, the blank look on his face amusing you a little. “we can watch something else too, if you want.”

“no!” he perked up. “let’s watch gatsby.”

eventually the two of you arrived at the train station, where goodbyes were exchanged rather reluctantly and awkwardly. yukhei watched as you took a few steps away from him before abruptly turning back around. 

“what’s wrong?” 

“your jacket!” you ran a hand through your hair abashedly. “i almost forgot! i mean i did, but.”

yukhei’s hands flew to yours before he could stop himself, stopping you from taking his black denim jacket off. 

“it gets cold in the train. you should have it.” his hands flew to his sides awkwardly. “you can give it back to me next time, it’s okay.”

“oh.” you said so softly that yukhei almost missed it. your eyes fell onto the short sleeves hugging his arms and he read your mind right away. 

“i’ll be fine. my bus ride home is pretty quick.” he reassured you. it was a lie. the weather had started getting cooler and that’s why he brought a jacket out in the first place, but it was nothing he couldn’t handle.

yukhei noticed that your cheeks had reddened a little. why were you so cute?

“okay then,” you said with a tiny smile. “thanks again, yukhei.”

yukhei landed on his bed face flat after a warm shower, absolutely exhausted and ready to hit the sack. to be fair, it had been a long day for him and it was close to midnight. 

if it was any other weekday night, he would be snoring already. but he had just sent you a text asking if you reached home already and was eagerly waiting for your reply. 

at last, after a long five minutes, yukhei’s phone buzzed a few times in a row. 

[from: _____][sent at 11:57PM] 

hey

i just got out of the shower

thx for checking in :)

and thx for tonight again, i had a good time :)

wait it’s almost 12!! 

you’re still awake? 

yukhei didn’t realise a bunch of alphabets and symbols could make him so happy. his thumb hovered over his phone screen as he began to type out a reply, but a more texts came flying in.

[from: _____][sent at 11:59PM]

well

in case you’re already sleeping..

goodnight and sweet dreams~

just minutes ago, he had been so ready to fall asleep. but the rush of happiness he experienced as he read your texts over again made that impossible now. yukhei couldn’t put away his phone, couldn’t stop himself from grinning. 

he was screwed. he knew he was, when that was the effect you had on him after only days of knowing each other.

--

“well, well, well. if it isn’t my favourite couple.” 

“sorry,” you sigh while yukhei simply shoots an apologetic smile at kunhang as he slips into the booth after you. “you know how bad traffic is at this hour.”

“it’s okay.” says ten who’s sitting next to kunhang and shoving his nintendo switch into his bag. “but we ordered some stuff first because i’m starving my ass off.”

“oh that’s great!” yukhei cheers. “i’m hungry too.”

“already? weren’t you guys just at your mum’s restaurant?” ten chuckles as he looks up, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

kunhang snorts. “he’s hungry all the time, remember? you should see his snack stash back at our dorms.” 

just before they parted ways at camp at the start of their vacation, kunhang had suggested to yukhei that they have a get-together meal with ten — the oldest of the trio who recently scored a job at a renown art gallery in town and decided to stay for good, instead of flying back to his hometown.

yukhei agreed to it, not just because he missed his friend dearly, but also because it’s been a while since all of you had a meal together. when he brought it up to you, you were thrilled at the idea of catching up with them, even if that meant giving up some of his already limited time with you. that’s how you and him ended up sitting across from his two best friends at a hot pot restaurant tonight. 

as food arrives and gradually takes up every inch of space on the table, everyone takes turns giving updates on their lives. yukhei shares memorable incidents at camp and kunhang adds on to his stories with funny anecdotes that make you and ten laugh, while ten announces that his longtime boyfriend, kun, has moved into his apartment. 

“so how’s it like living with kun so far?” you ask, ladling soup from the simmering pot in the center of the table for everyone. 

“i’m getting used to my fridge having food and my kitchen actually being used.” ten replies with a shy smile that yukhei rarely got to see. “it’s only been a week and it’s getting messy in there, but i’m not complaining.” 

“aw.” 

yukhei hears you coo, and he can practically see the look of endearment on your face even though he’s focused on all the meat you’ve put on his plate earlier. 

“and when are the two of you planning to tell us that you’re getting married?” the long-haired boy smirks, squinting at the gold band hugging your ring finger. 

the question stunts you and yukhei and kunhang nearly chokes on his sprite. the innocent smile that was on ten’s face just seconds ago was now long gone and replaced with a mischievous one.

“married?” kunhang exclaims, his voice so loud that the couple in the next booth turns over to look. thoroughly embarrassed, he presses the front of his cap down to hide his eyes. “how am i not the first person to know this, yukhei?”

yukhei sighs. where, and how, should he begin? 

as he glares at ten who’s enjoying this a bit too much, you set your chopsticks down and hold your hand out to an eager kunhang, who marvels at the piece of jewellery on your ring finger up close.

“so?” ten lets out a cheeky, high-pitched giggle at the look yukhei gives him. “did you guys just come back from telling your fam the good news or…?”

yukhei grins devilishly as he picks up a bean sprout with his chopsticks, ready to fling it at ten, but you’re faster than him. 

“we’re not—i mean, we’re getting married. eventually! not now, obviously.” you chuckle in a flustered manner.

we’re getting married. 

yukhei’s heart flutters at that sentence. he wants to hear you say that again, wants to be the one to tell his friends that. 

“you’ll be the first to know when we do.” yukhei adds, nudging kunhang’s foot underneath the table, earning an eye-roll from ten.

“well, you better.” kunhang quipped. “we’ve been talking about this for years now. it’s time you two quit playing and actually get it done.” 

“ah, so this is a promise ring?” ten cuts in excitedly. it’s now his turn to examine the ring as kunhang gets back to his food. “it’s so pretty. it definitely suits you.”

“thanks,” you beam as you pull your hand back. “yukhei got it years ago but won’t tell me when or where. says it’s a secret.”

the two boys gawk at yukhei right away and he sighs, bracing himself for what’s to come. 

“oh xuxi, you romantic baby!” ten teases, clearly having the time of his life making yukhei blush tonight. 

“so this is what you were nervous about!” kunhang scoffs in disbelief before looking between you and ten. “we were on the train back to the city and he wouldn’t shut up about being nervous for some surprise plan. and he just wouldn’t tell me what!” 

“oh my god, you guys are so cute. it’s gross.” ten shakes his head. “you’re lucky i love you both!”

yukhei smiles bashfully. he was a little embarrassed at first, but of course ten and kunhang had to make it worse. he wanted to pull his beanie over his entire face and ignore everything.

you’re awfully silent next to him as you glance between your food and your lap shyly, your hair shielding your face from everyone else. a warm rush of adoration washes over yukhei and he finds himself gently adjusting your hair, tugging a loose strand behind your ear.

“okay, that’s it.” kunhang groans, grabbing his bag and pretending to leave the table. “thanks for the meal, you guys.” 

“you can’t just leave!” ten exclaims, reaching for his cup of tea. “you haven’t asked _____ for her friends’ numbers yet.” 

kunhang stares at ten, his eyes widening and jaw dropping in horror before he starts bickering with him — a scene that has you bursting into laughter and yukhei reminiscing the good old days where the four of you would hang out at the mall for hours after class. kunhang was always so starstruck by the popular girls at your all-girls school though you weren’t close with any of them. nothing has really changed since you entered university. 

“you told me to remind you!” ten retorts. 

“not in front of everyone!” kunhang cries dramatically.

“dude. it’s literally just the four of us.” ten deadpans. “always has been.”

“anyway,” kunhang rolls his eyes as he turns to face you. “so, _____. any of your friends single again?” 

you do your best to look sympathetic before shaking your head. yukhei splutters out a laugh while ten pats kunhang’s shoulder in an attempt to comfort him. 

“this would be a lot easier if you were, you know, into guys.” 

--

yukhei’s first kiss with you was, for him, a long time coming. 

it happened at the end of your fifth date, after a day spent at the park. 

summer had fully transitioned into fall and the weather was cool enough for the two of you to set up a picnic at a sunny spot. everything was perfect — from the calming sounds of nature to the desserts you both brought to the cute dress you wore underneath your sweater that matched the greenery around you.

more than a month had passed since yukhei first met you. with every date, the urge to hold your hands when you walked around in public and to kiss you and finally know what your lips tasted like kept growing. 

yukhei smiled as he watched you talk about your week even though he already heard these stories since you text each other so much. your words went in and out of his ears and it was hard for him to concentrate because all he could think of was whether you liked him too.

there were moments that made him consider it a possibility, like how you surprised him with his favourite snacks after one of his javelin practice sessions or the way you would smile when you caught him staring at your face.

he was torn between over-romanticising those moments and acknowledging them as the plain and simple fact that you liked him too.

he felt it again as the two of you watched the sun set and slowly sink into the horizon across the river, the sky dissolving into hues of orange. 

the scene in front of him was majestic, but yukhei could only concentrate on how close to him you and him were. so close that your arms were brushing against each other’s, so close that you could rest your head on his shoulder if you leaned a little. 

“i like this a lot.” you said out of the blue, your eyes still fixed on the sunset in the distance. you leaned back, anchoring your palms against the mat to make yourself comfortable.

“i like you a lot.” 

yukhei couldn’t stop himself. those words had been kept inside him for too long. 

silence hung in the air as your proximity grew tense. yukhei couldn’t see your face and he was starting to think that maybe it was for his own good. when he felt you sitting up straight and he held his breath, expecting the worst.

“i like you too.” your voice was barely audible and you sounded just as nervous as he did, but yukhei heard you loud and clear.

his eyes widened as he turned to you at the speed of light. you had been looking at him nervously but as soon as your eyes met, your gaze quickly flickered towards your hands that were fidgeting with the sleeve of your sweater. 

“really?” yukhei placed his hand over yours, gently circling the back of it with his thumb. “you like me… in that way?” 

“yeah.” you mumbled, resting your head in the nook between his neck and shoulder exactly how he had pictured in his mind earlier. “i like you. a lot.”

relief flooded yukhei’s veins and he could finally breathe hearing you say the words he had so badly wanted to hear. nothing else mattered in that moment, because all he could think of was you seeing him in the same light he saw you in. 

and suddenly, everything made sense to him. how could he be so stupid, after all that had happened in the past few weeks? the way you’d remember the little details of things he told you and how you’d blush at his terrible pick-up lines? of course you liked him too. 

“what are you thinking about?” you squeezed his hand as you pulled back to look at him. 

your face had never been so close to his. yukhei could count your eyelashes and have a proper look at your lips that looked soft and velvety. everything about this moment made it impossible for him to ignore what he had been dreaming of doing.

“can i kiss you?” yukhei asked.

all he could remember was how your eyes lit up instantly, every trace of worry fading away as an innocent smile graced your face. then you leaned in and closed your eyes just as he did, your lips meeting in a long awaited kiss. 

yukhei cupped the side of your face with one hand, his thumb drawing soothing circles over your cheekbones. he felt himself sink into the feeling of your fluffy lips moving languidly against his, the way they tasted sweet like the strawberry shortcakes you shared earlier. 

it took everything in yukhei to not whine when you pulled away to catch your breath, even though the kiss was probably longer than it should have been. he could still feel the butterflies in stomach as you pressed your forehead against his and he didn’t want them to fade away so soon, so he spoiled you with a few chaste kisses in a row that left both your lips tingling by the end.

“been wanting to do that for a long time.” yukhei beamed. 

he reached for your hand that had been on his knee and interlocked your fingers — a small gesture he could now make anytime he wanted, and that made him a very happy boy. 

the sun was almost gone but even under the dim fluorescent lighting from the street lamps, yukhei could tell that you were flushing and giddy with affection like him. the golden hour casted a warm orange glow onto your skin and you couldn’t look more like the girl of his dreams. 

“i know. me too.”

the butterflies in yukhei’s stomach fluttered wildly at the sound of your airy chuckle. there was nothing that could take away the smile on his face.

-- 

yukhei did not expect to wake up to the sight of you in nothing but his camo jacket.

the lack of body heat woke him up and he found himself once again lying alone in bed and wondering where you were — but all his thoughts flew out of the window when he heard the bedroom door creak and saw you stepping back in. 

he had to blink a few times to make sure his mind wasn’t playing tricks on him and that you were indeed, dressed only in his camo army jacket.

you’re standing beforeyour dresser to examine the love mark yukhei branded on your neck the night before, oblivious to how he’s silently observing you and getting hard again. 

there’s something about the way his jacket reaches your midthigh and teasingly moves upwards to offer him a glimpse of your ass each time you lifted your hands to run over your skin that turns him on so much. and he has seen you in his t-shirts and muscle tanks many times before, but none of that could compare to how you looked right now and he has no clue why so.

maybe it’s the consecutive months of being deprived of your touch and having to picture your body as he took cold showers to relieve himself on some mornings. but he doesn’t have to rely on his imagination now that you’re here, in front of him, like a present waiting to be unwrapped and appreciated.

yukhei lets out a whine that gets muffled into the pillow, but you hear it immediately and whirl around in surprise.

“hey.” you smile lazily as you make your way back to bed, landing on your knees and crawling towards him. 

yukhei’s eyes are glued to the gap between his unbuttoned jacket, which hangs loose enough on your body to bless him with the sight of your cleavage, the smooth expanse of your body, and as he lowers his gaze — your core between your parted thighs. 

he’s visibly infatuated, and you clearly don’t entertain that as you sit on where his crotch is beneath the sheets, lying down on him to give him a quick smooch. your lips are warm and taste like lemon, which tells yukhei you just had your morning mug of tea.

“morning,” yukhei mumbles, slipping a hand beneath his jacket to rest on your back. your skin is smooth and warm under his touch as always. “this looks so much better on you.” 

“yeah?” you chuckle softly. “hope you don’t mind, it was cold.”

“i don’t mind it at all,” yukhei smiles, raising his other hand to cup your cheek affectionately. “but i need you.”

“need you to warm me up, baby.” he says, his voice deepening with the next sentence. “want you to ride me in this.” 

you’re looking down at him in a hazy gaze when your breathing pauses. you don’t answer him with words — instead, you slot your lips between his, never pulling away as you get on your knees and pull the covers off. 

yukhei sighs into the kiss at the feeling of his cock standing tall and unrestrained, desperately begging for your attention. he lets out a heavier sigh as your hand wraps around his hard length and starts stroking him with purpose.

“just like that.” he groans, his eyebrows furrowed in pleasure as his hips start thrusting into your grip. you line his jaw with kisses, making him feel pampered and content. 

“want you too.” you purr.

yukhei hears how needy you are and tightens his grip on your ass, but you’re already one step ahead of him. repositioning yourself, you let your slick folds slide against the length of his cock as you continue pumping him, lubricating him with your own arousal. 

the room is filled with desperate sighs. you’re grinding your clit over his tip when it becomes all too much for yukhei, who wants to be deep inside you already.

“baby,” yukhei mutters, squeezing your ass cheeks which elicits a loud gasp from you. “need to be in you now. please.”

the urgency in his voice prompts you to lean forward and stable yourself with a hand pressed to his chest. yukhei watches you guide his cock towards your opening before sinking onto him in one go. 

“fuck.” his throat goes dry at the feeling of your soaking walls enveloping all of him and his jaw slackens as he takes a few moments to appreciate how it feels to be buried in you.

“yukhei,” you whine. “it’s hot.”

he watches you shrug his jacket off, letting it hang past your shoulders in a teasing manner. at this point, he just wants to rip it off you. but all he manages is a guttural groan before running his hands up and down your thighs.

“you’re driving me insane, baby.”

you giggle softly at his words, the sound ringing in his ears and going straight to his cock.

“i love you.” you tell him sweetly and kiss him again. then you plant your hands flat against his lower abdomen where his abs are, lifting yourself off him until only his head is left stretching you open.

yukhei grunts when you drop back down slowly and start riding him at a hypnotic rhythm. he’s too overwhelmed to say a word, too entranced by your breathy moans and the lewd image of your chest rising and falling. 

you’re clenching around him in such a delicious way that all he can do is knead your asscheeks with his large hands and let out deep “uh-uh-uh”s. 

“fuck,” yukhei hisses as he watches you arch your back, moving you hips differently to get the perfect angle. 

“let me take over, baby.”

yukhei plants his feet flat on the mattress just as he feels a familiar tight feeling in his balls. you oblige right away and collapse against him, ready for him to fuck you senseless.

pressed chest to chest, he grips onto your ass firmly as he starts pounding into you from below. 

the scent of passion and desire wafted through the air. his cock leaves and enters you at a brutal pace, the sound of skin slapping only getting more erratic with your cries for his name right by his ear.

“yukhei…” you cry weakly as his tip nudges your sweet spot again and again. 

“i’m here, baby. gonna come inside you, you want that?” 

“y-yes. miss you filling me up.”

yukhei curses, and you reach your high just seconds before he does. your entire body shakes in pleasure before he comes into you, flooding your insides with his warm release. he groans as you ride out your high and roll your hips, the feeling of you being warm and full all too heavenly.

after a short while of nothing but heavy breathing as the both of you succumb to a blissful state, yukhei removes the jacket hanging off your elbows and rolls you over with his softening cock still snug in you. he hums in satisfaction, nuzzling his face against your neck as your fingers comb through his hair. 

“i love you.” yukhei sighs contentedly. “didn’t get to say it back just now.”

he hears you hum softly and feels a peck on his forehead. when he gains the energy to pull back and look at you, he finds your eyes already on him, half-open in adoration. 

“i’ll clean us up, okay?” yukhei asks softly, his elbows pressing against the mattress as he moves to get up. he’s sure there’s already a mess on your sheets. 

“no, don’t go.” you murmured, tightening your thighs around his hips in an attempt to lock him in place. you end up pushing him deeper into you instead, making him hiss. “stay like this for a bit.” 

yukhei notes the clinginess in your voice and the way your hands trace love patterns along the curves of his back. he lies back down, joining your lips in a deep kiss. 

“i’m not going anywhere.”

it’s so easy for him to do whatever you say, he realises. you have him wrapped around your finger because you’re just as clingy as he is — and only he gets to see that side of you.

--

yukhei had sex with you for the first time in a hotel overlooking the ocean. 

it had been his first holiday with you. every december, yukhei would fly back to his mum’s hometown in thailand with his family to visit his relatives — that wasn’t anything new. what was new though, was you tagging along after his mum had enthusiastically asked you to join them. 

the week-long trip was the most fun yukhei had in years. minus the shy introductions and teasing from his relatives who were overjoyed to finally meet his pretty girlfriend whom they’ve heard much about over phone calls, it was like a mini honeymoon for the two of you. 

after catching up with his cousins in the first half of the trip, yukhei spent all the other days ‘having fun by yourselves’ as his mum had insisted. you ended up exploring the coastal town, hanging out at the beach, and eating the local food to your heart’s content.

the highlight of the trip for yukhei though, was finally being able to make love to you. the resort stay was a godsend opportunity after the many interruptions during your steamy makeout sessions in yukhei’s tiny bedroom. it was the perfect time and place that you both needed.

yukhei swore you were a goddess as you laid on the bed with your legs spread out, your hair fanned out against the pillows, patiently waiting for him to put the condom on. 

it was his first time seeing all of you, your curves and body marks displayed to him like a work of art in a museum. he couldn’t look away, couldn’t ignore how rosy your face was from coming apart on his fingers just minutes earlier.

“is this okay?” yukhei asked tenderly, pausing when he stretched you out halfway. “can i go deeper, baby?” 

you nodded fervently though the tense look on your face made yukhei unsure. he really wanted you to enjoy this too. sensing his hesitation, you pulled him down for a deep kiss. 

“so tight, fuck—” yukhei mumbles against your lips as he pushed himself further into you, his hands caressing the underside of your thighs.

yukhei sighed, the pressure to not come quickly making him slightly nervous. it was difficult not to when your walls were warm and hugging his cock like a glove, letting him experience euphoria like never before. 

“beautiful.” his voice gentle as he gave you an open-mouthed kiss. “all mine.” 

as soon as you signalled for him to move, yukhei took charge, thrusting into you slowly as he gauged your reaction. his pace quickened after a while a combination of sighs and moans spilled from your mouth. your neck arched against the pillows, presenting him with the perfect location for a love mark. 

but yukhei was distracted. he couldn’t take his eyes off your soaking core, couldn’t get over the way you stretched open to welcome him each time his cock slid all the way back in. he had seen his fingers disappear in you before so many times, but this image was incomparable. 

“so deep,” you said breathlessly, your fingernails digging crescent moons into his back. 

yukhei looked at you. from the hair that stuck to the side of your neck to your lashes fluttered shut in pleasure, you were a sight to behold. 

“yeah?” he kissed you sloppily. “does it feel good?”

“yes—oh!” you whimpered just as yukhei’s fingertips landed on the sensitive bundle of nerves right above where you and him were connected. 

he drew circles on it with his thumb, groaning when you clenched around him. “you feel so good around me too, baby. you’re doing so well.”

yukhei’s thrusts grew uneven as he coaxed you into your orgasm. by the time he shot his release into the rubber, you came undone beneath him too, crying out in rapture one last time as your thighs shook intensely. 

a moment of silence hung in the air as your pants slowly faded into deep and slow inhalations. seeing you come all over him, because of him, gave yukhei’s ego a huge boost. it didn’t help that you were trembling in sensitivity while he cleaned you up as gently as he could and muttered praises into your ear.

“yukhei,” you called him softly and he halted his movements, worried that he had accidentally hurt you. 

“i don’t know if i can go out tomorrow.” you mumbled, covering your eyes with the back of your hand. 

yukhei instantly relaxed, a smirk taking over his face as he threw the wet wipes aside.  “we don’t have to go out, but i can carry you wherever you like.”

when you didn’t respond, he crawled over you and pulled your hand away. you avoided his gaze, looking at his chest instead. 

“i’m serious, baby.” yukhei tilted your chin up and looked into your eyes as genuinely as he could. “we can stay in all day if you want.”

“okay. sounds nice.” your hand quickly hovered over your face again. 

the smirk on yukhei’s face softened into a smile. it was amusing and adorable to him, how you could still be this shy after the night’s events. he felt as if he was in heaven and within the next second, he was placing kisses everywhere on your face but your lips. when you broke into a fit of giggles, yukhei couldn’t help but keep going. he finally stopped when your hands framed his jaw, guiding his plump lips back to yours for a short, innocent kiss. 

“thank you for being so patient with me tonight.” you paused, swallowing a lump down your throat. “it was nice even though i’m a little sore now.”

yukhei’s heart grew three times at your words.

“is that all? just nice?” he smirked. 

you pinched his bicep playfully and hid your face again, muttering something about him being so annoying. 

“i’m playing with you,” yukhei giggled, pretty sure he had hearts in his eyes as he looked at you. “love seeing you get all shy for me like this.” and with that, he pulled your hands apart and trapped them against the pillows. 

just as he was about to kiss away the pout on your lips, the sound of a door slamming shut thundered down the hallway and echoed in the room, sending both of you into speechlessness. 

yukhei put his boxers on hurriedly, rushing to the balcony and sighing in relief when he noticed the lights in the next room a distance away had just turned on — a sign that his parents, who had been out the entire evening, have just gotten back. at that moment, he couldn’t be more thankful that his plans for the night turned out well. he wouldn’t know how to face his parents if they overheard him and you, and just the sheer thought of it brought goosebumps to his arms.

“are they back?” you asked nervously, pulling the covers up to your chin.

yukhei nodded, turning the bedside lamp off before cuddling up to you. “we have to be quiet.”

“oh, we will be.” you yawned, making him smile and hug you more tightly. you responded by wiggling around in his embrace. “yukhei, i’m sticky.” 

“don’t care.” he whispered against your skin. “just wanna hold my baby like this.” 

after a few more indulgent kisses and sweet nothings were exchanged under the moonlight, you dozed off in each other’s arms.

the next morning, yukhei woke up to the sound of waves crashing onto the shore. you were already awake and sitting up with the covers wrapped around you as you silently admired the swaying palm trees outside. yukhei sat up sluggishly, planting a kiss on your shoulder. 

you turned around to return a kiss to his lips, eyes still closed when you pulled away, the intimacy of last night clearly still in the air. you opened your eyes, looking completely lost in him just like he was in you.

“good morning to you too.”

the rest of the day was slow and relaxed. you both agreed to stay in the resort, and so the afternoon flew by as you lounged by the pool and dined at the restaurant next to the beach. safe to say, the sight of you in a bikini all day led to another intimate, even raunchier night. 

--

yukhei thinks he’s ready to move in with you.

maybe it sounds a little impulsive. but that’s because there haven’t been a lot of opportunities for the two of you to live together, with yukhei studying at another university and you living in a shared apartment over the past few years. 

but staying at your apartment over these few days has given yukhei a sneak peek of life under the same roof as you, and he loves it so much that he wants to be done with his enlistment duties and fast forward to the part where he gets to share a home with you already.

yukhei wants to wake up past noon on weekends and whip up a hearty brunch with you, wants to spend the rest of the day helping you with mundane tasks like laundry and watering all your plants.

yukhei wants to be there for you on days where you’re exhausted from grad school life, when you turn down his pleas for you to take a break despite being drained from staring at your laptop screen. but he’ll massage your tensed shoulders, take your glasses off, and pull you to bed where you doze off to his soothing back rubs and soft praises of how proud of you he is and how well you’re doing.

he craves that kind of domesticity even right now as you lay on top of him, your limbs entangled comfortably and your cheek squished against his chest while your eyes are glued to the great gatsby playing on the tv.

there aren’t any plans to go out today due to the simple fact that you were both too lazy to get dressed and leave the house unless it’s for food. and probably because, though you wouldn’t admit it openly, you want him all to yourself — which is fine because yukhei feels the exact same towards you. 

the living room is hushed as you and him watch a drenched gatsby reunite with daisy in a lavishly decorated flower-filled cottage. you sit up just as the scene ends, elbowing the couch as you rest your chin on your palm.

“why are you looking at me like that?” yukhei asks. there’s an unsure look on your face that he can’t quite read.

“i think i remember.” you hold your other hand up, flashing the ring that has been making you so happy. “thailand?”

yukhei grins brightly, the top row of his teeth showing. he nods proudly, taking your hand in his to look at the ring — a thin gold band with a pale blue sapphire — and admire the way it gleams in the afternoon sunlight. 

it’s just as beautiful as the first time he saw it in that gift shop in thailand. 

yukhei remembers that day vividly. it was the last day of the trip, and both of you were shopping around for souvenirs for your friends back home. he caught you admiring a few vintage jewellery pieces by yourself as he stood in the corner of one of the many shops you stepped into that day, pretending to be interested in some touristy postcards. though it didn’t seem like much to him at first, he later noticed that you picked up the same ring a few times, looking back at it even as you walked away. 

eventually, thanks to what he could say in his broken thai, he managed to charm the shop owner into reserving that very ring for him. yukhei secretly returned for them while you thought you were waiting for him to be done in the bathroom at a cafe. he felt a little bad at first, but he knew it had to be done or else he’d regret it so much in the years to come. 

yukhei always imagined what the ring would look like on your finger. its design enthralled him when he first examined it up close and he quickly understood why you took such a liking to it — after all, anything vintage was right up your alley. little did he know it would look even more beautiful sitting on your ring finger. 

“oh my god.” you let out a huff of disbelief as soon as he finishes explaining everything. 

you’re speechless as your eyes flick back and forth between the ring and the coy look on yukhei’s face. this is the reaction he has been waiting for. 

“yukhei.” your voice is fragile, like you’re about to cry any moment. 

the smirk on yukhei’s face drops immediately. he does not like hearing his name from you like that. 

“what’s wrong?” 

“nothing,” you smile weakly, quickly brushing away the tears that escaped your eyes with the back of your hand. “i just love you so much.”

“and i’m going to miss you. a lot.” you continue before he gets to reply. “every day. all over again. i miss you already.” 

“oh, baby.” yukhei croons as he wraps his arms around you, pulling you down for a tight hug. he rubs your back, feeling helpless at the sound of your sniffles. 

yukhei knew this would happen. of course he did. he’s struggling just as much as you are to ignore the impending distance you’ll both have to deal with again — maybe that’s why he was clinging onto the idea of a future with you so tightly. 

“we’ve talked about this. the sooner the better, right? ” yukhei says sadly, finding it hard to agree with himself.

“i know, i’m just being emotional again. i’m sorry.” you chuckle unhumorously. “i didn’t think i’d get to see you before the year ends, you know? but you came back. you’re actually here and i’m so happy.” 

“and,” you prop your arm up on his chest, the promise ring once again in yukhei’s view. a moment passes as the two of you stare at it — the symbol of your love and future.

“i love you so much. i want to live the rest of my life with you, like the past few days.” you say resolutely.

yukhei is overwhelmed with happiness, love, and nostalgia all at once. suddenly he’s transported back to that park where you first kissed as teenagers, where he first found out that you liked him too. but loving someone and knowing that they love you back so much so that they want to be with you forever is something so much more special. it’s a privilege yukhei never thought he’d have. 

and now, he does. as he looks into your eyes, he realises that you’ve blessed him with that privilege, and that you’re truly the best thing that has ever happened to him. 

yukhei finds himself unable to express in words just how he feels at this moment. so he shifts your bodies around until you’re lying side by side, until all he sees is your face up close. he cups your tear-streaked cheeks before softly brushing his lips against yours, sinking in the warmth that blossoms in his chest. 

“i love you.” he says delicately when he pulls away, tugging a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “i’m so glad the universe chose you for me.” 

the fond smile on your face falters as a tear rolls down your cheek and your bottom lip begin to quiver, the violins playing in the long-forgotten movie adding more melancholy than needed to this moment. 

yukhei’s heart breaks as he watches you avoid his gaze and desperately blink away the tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. but he knows that you two will make it, that the distance is merely temporary. and he knows you know it too. what you and him have is so strong. 

“hey, look at me.” he whispers.

you turn towards him, your eyes curiously examining his face.

“i’m gonna come home. to you.” yukhei places a kiss on your forehead. “and it won’t be long. think about it baby, i’ll be out this time next year and we could be living together by then.”

“i can’t wait for that.”

“me too. you’ll get to wake up next to me everyday, but you’ll have to teach me how to not burn our pancakes for breakfast until they’re perfect.”

at last, the corners of your lips twitch and you chuckle into the sleeve of your sweater. 

“how does that sound?”

“waking up to you everyday or the pancakes?”

“me coming home. and us living together.”

“like a dream come true.”

a moment passes as you smile at each other in a placid silence. 

yukhei cups the side of your face with one hand, brushing over your cheekbone and memorising every little detail that adorned your face and made him feel at home no matter where he is. you lean into his touch, reveling in the warmth of his palm. 

the fact that he only has one more day until he will have to wait months before he gets to be with you like this again makes his heart swell in longing. so he holds you close, enjoying the moment while he still can. 

-- 

the first time yukhei told you he loved you, it was an accident — not really. 

that morning, he was awoken by a ball of fur nuzzling against his bare shoulder.

he opened his eyes, looking around the room for a good minute before spotting a familiar siamese cat that was perched at the foot of the bed and observing him with its soft gloomy eyes like it had been waiting for him to wake up for the longest time. 

“good morning, louis.” 

the cat meowed once as if announcing its disappointment in yukhei before hopping off the bed and making its grand exit by squeezing through the slim door gap.

yukhei shrugged, reaching for his phone that had been charging on the nightstand right by the bed. a quick look at the time and date on his lock screen refreshed his memory, vaguely reminding him of the events of the night before. 

he crashed against the mattress and let out a muffled groan into the pillows, shuddering at the thought of how much alcohol he had downed. he was absolutely regretting his idea of not having a birthday party, but instead an entire night of drinking to celebrate turning his legal age. 

his final hours of being seventeen were fun, though. ten, kunhang, and a couple of other friends brought him to an upscale steakhouse located in the city’s nightlife district. but like every other boys’ night out, the night eventually descended into borderline chaos. in last night’s case, they went through too many rounds of drinking games and yukhei soon came to the realisation that he was the type to get all giggly and sappy when intoxicated. 

yukhei threw the covers over himself and ignored the dryness in his throat, ready to slip back into slumber but he couldn’t. something felt off. he grabbed his phone again and there you were, smiling back at him in his lockscreen wallpaper. 

oh no.

flashbacks of how he had asked for you last night and proudly claimed that you were “the one” for him came running back to him. he quickly unlocked his phone, checking his text messages. 

[to: ♥][sent at 1:55AM]

hey baaby

baby

i miss u ;(

ii'm still with ten and. kunhang

he mahde me drink so muhch hheheehe

babyy reply me plz 

i can seee u readin all of thiks :(

i miss You

[from: ♥][sent at 1:56AM]

oh my god yukhei

are you okay?

wru now???

[to: ♥][sent at 1:58AM]

hi bab

im OK

at tens place now…

he has 2 catss. theyre so Cute 

anyway 

i need to tell u sometxhing

its rneally imbportant

and that is i love u 

u make me so happi

u r so pretttyjf n soooo smart

ur alsoreally kind.. lwiterally an angel

hdeheheheheheee

im so lucky to be youre boyfrjend

becayuse i get to see Ur smile everyyday. hold your hand whenegver i want

onlyi can call u Baby

did u know ? 

i bet u djd not ;)

i l o v e LOVE you 

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

[incoming call from: ♥] 

declined.

[incoming call from: ♥] 

declined.

[from: ♥][sent at 2:00AM]

why aren’t you picking up yukhei

you’re making me worried now

are you okay :( 

[to: ♥][sent at 2:15AM]

hey _____, ten here. don’t worry about xuxi! he just passed out on my couch. 

[attachment: 1 image]

i’m just gonna let him crash here tonight since my parents aren’t back anyway. feel free to pop by in the morning btw, i think he would be really happy. and sorry for texting you at this hour!! goodnight :D

yukhei stared at his phone screen blankly, the jumbled letters of his drunk texts burning into his eyes. there was also that picture of him sprawled across the leather couch in ten’s living room in deep slumber, with his shirt completely unbuttoned and a party hat strapped to his forehead like a unicorn.

“morning, birthday boy.” 

yukhei’s heart jumped. he jammed his thumb against the button on the side of his phone, turning around to find ten’s head poking out of the door. 

“how are you feeling?” ten asked. yukhei sat up immediately when he saw a glass of water in his friend’s hand. “like shit, i’m guessing.”

ten sat himself down at the foot of the bed, handing the water to an eager yukhei who gulps it all at one go.

“close enough. i feel like i’ve been run over by a bus.” yukhei replied, coughing to clear the raspiness in his voice. 

ten hummed. “well, your girl came over with a lot of food. i think you’ll feel better after eating.” 

yukhei’s eyes widened, his voice lowering into a whisper. “she’s here? now?”

“sort of. she went out to get coffee with guanheng but they should be back soon.” ten narrowed his eyes at yukhei, trying to read the look on his face. “what’s wrong?” 

“nothing.” 

“uh huh.” ten snorted. “you suck at lying.” 

“okay, fine. i might have spammed her with some texts last night while i was wasted.”

“oh yeah, i saw those. you were crying for her for at least thirty minutes last night by the way.”

“fuck.” yukhei let out a groan. “let’s not talk about that. not now please, ten-ge.” 

“okay, okay.” ten smirked. “only because it’s your birthday. now, continue.”

“i told her i love her. like, love love her.” 

“oh.” ten paused, his expression fading into one of confusion. “wait, i don’t get it. is that a bad thing?” 

“no, no. it’s not.” yukhei cut in quickly, glancing at the door every few seconds nervously. “it’s just—i haven’t told her that before!” he whisper-shouted. 

“i don’t know how she reacted to it! what if she doesn’t feel the same?”

ten burst into laughter right away, his eyes squinting into crescents. “oh, xuxi. you’re so cute when you’re in love, you know?” 

“i really don’t think you have to worry about her not feeling the same. but i do think you should go tell her in person soon.” 

yukhei blinked, relaxing a little when he realised that ten was probably right. the older male grinned, ruffling yukhei’s bed hair playfully before leaving the room. 

in less than five minutes the door swung open again, and yukhei tensed a little when he saw you, almost as if he had seen a ghost. he didn’t realise you were back already and had been planning to sit in anxiety by himself for thirty more minutes.

“you okay?” you chuckled as you walked over and sat next to him. 

yukhei hummed as you cradled the side of his face with one hand, your thumb smoothing away the drool crust on the corner of his lips that he didn’t even realise had been there. 

“someone clearly had a lot of fun last night.”

yukhei’s lips curled into a silly, crooked smile as you crossed your arms and pouted. your attempt at guilt-tripping him had failed completely, it endeared you instead and suddenly he felt like his drunk self bombarding you with all those confessions last night. 

your lips eventually cracked into a huge grin. you threw your arms around his shoulders, doing your best to engulf his big frame in a tight hug which made yukhei chuckle. he loved it whenever you hugged him like that or let him be the small spoon when you cuddled.

“happy birthday bub.” you coo dearly, giving each of his cheeks a loud smooch which made his face scrunch up adorably. “are you sure you’re okay?” 

“thank you, baby.” yukhei smiled, his mind completely free from his worries already. “i’m okay, just a little hungry.”

“well, it just so happens that there are loads of yummy things waiting outside. maybe even some of your favourite desserts.” you smirked enticingly as you grabbed his hand and stood up. “c’mon, let’s go eat.” 

“wait.” yukhei’s breathing stuttered, pulling you back quickly. “i need to tell you something.”

you moved into the spot between his legs, waiting for him to say something as your hands hung in the air intertwined.

“what is it?” you asked.

yukhei looked up at you, taking in the curious smile on your face. it brought so much joy and warmth to his life and he could never get tired of seeing that.

“i love you.” yukhei said, each word rolling off his tongue so naturally. “all those texts i sent you last night? i meant every single word. i love you, _____.” 

your eyes were glossy as you relaxed a little, sinking into his touch when he clasped his arms around your thighs to pull you closer. yukhei could tell you were recalling all those cheesy texts as you bit your lip shyly.

he closed his eyes just as you bent down to slot your lips against his in the most delicate way possible before whispering those three words back, as if they were only for him to hear. 

“i love you too, yukhei. you make me so happy.” 

“say it again.” yukhei asked, his voice laced with desperation even though he knew it was the first of many ‘i love you’s to come. 

your cheek was soft and warm in the palm of his hand. you grinned, closing the distance between your lips once more.

“i love you.”

it was the best birthday gift yukhei had ever received.

--

as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end. 

in yukhei’s case, the past five days have flown by quickly and alas, it is the penultimate day of his short vacation. 

but he’s more than satisfied with how the week has gone by despite how short it felt. he managed to visit his family, catch up with his closest friends, recover all the hours of sleep he had lost while on duty, and most importantly, be around you literally every day of this vacation so far. he woke up and slept next to you, cooked and ate all his favourite foods with you, and interrupted every other activity with sex and cuddling sessions — and he wouldn’t have it any other way. just looking back on those moments brought a smile to his face. 

his thoughts are interrupted when the door to your bedroom opens and you walk in with a small stack of laundry in one hand. 

”thank you baby.” he says, taking the clothes he had worn in the past few days, that are now clean, from you. they’re still warm from being fresh out of the dryer, and he gets a whiff of roses when he holds them under his nose. 

“you’re very welcome.” you plop down right next to where he had been sitting cross-legged on the floor, packing his belongings. 

as yukhei stuffs his sneakers deep into the bottom of his haversack, you look at all his other things that have been laid out neatly, side-by-side, on your bedroom rug. he doesn’t pay much attention as you pick up his wallet and entertain yourself with its contents.

“is this what i think it is?” 

you ask, pulling out a small folded piece of paper that was stuffed into one of the card compartments. the look of curiosity on your face morphs into one of surprise as soon as you unfold it completely and realise what it is.

“you keep this in your wallet?”

it’s one of the few handwritten letters you mailed to him during his first month in camp when he, like every one of his teammates, had zero access to their phones and gadgets. 

yukhei still remembers how tough that period of time was. being thrown into a whole new environment and expected to adjust to a lifestyle that was the complete opposite of university life was not easy at all. not only was his freedom snatched away, he had to deal with a long list of strict rules and responsibilities dumped onto him. and as if all that wasn’t enough, he had to witness his newly-made friends live through the countless military break-up horror stories he heard from his seniors.

it was a lot, but he got through each day thanks to the camaraderie he shared with his team and those letters you had mailed him, since they were the only form of communication he had with you. 

“yeah. it got me through some tough times, you know.” yukhei admits, watching you read through your own words. 

each letter was detailed with updates on your life and things his mum told you to convey to him. they all ended with a short paragraph of best wishes and sweet words which yukhei appreciated very much because he was absolutely sick of hearing about duty and honour.

yukhei had no idea he was so sentimental. he’d reread those letters in your voice, stare at your handwriting, and hold it up to his nose to get the faint scent of your perfume. it was like a piece of you — which was what he needed to fight the homesickness gnawing at him. 

“maybe you should write to me.” you mumble, refusing to look at him as you slid the letter back into his wallet. “i mean, if you’re not too busy. i would love getting mail from you even though we can text and facetime now.”

“i’ll try to, baby.” yukhei smirks. “my good morning and goodnight texts not enough for you?” 

“no,” you drawl, rolling your eyes playfully. “i love waking up to a bunch of heart and rose emojis.” 

yukhei laughs, going back to packing his things while you roll his clothes into bundles that would help him save space. after a short while of teamwork between you two, his haversack is stuffed and he’s done.

“don’t forget these,” you hand him his leather glasses case that had been sitting on your bedside table. then you’re on your feet, pacing around the room as your eyes scan every inch of the space, looking out for anything he might’ve missed. 

“i’ve looked everywhere earlier.” yukhei tells you before getting on his feet too. he stretches his arms high above him and lets out a silent yawn. “i think that’s it.”

“okay.” you answer in a small voice. 

now that you’re done helping him pack, there’s just one last thing left to do and it just happens to be the hardest task of all — you’ll have to say goodbye to him this time, tomorrow, at the train station.

that realisation settles between the two of you, once again compelling yukhei to make the most out of the time he has left. with a sad smile he holds his arms out, instantly drawing you into his embrace like a moth of a flame. you squish your cheek against him, hands locked behind his back as he hugs you warm and securely. 

“you need to stop working out so much, your abs are hard enough.” your voice comes out slightly muffled. “by the time you’re out, i’m gonna be hugging a rock.” 

yukhei grins at your words, bursting into full-blown giggles when your fingers poke into his sides and smooth across his tummy. the faint muscle lines that were there before he enlisted were now more defined, some even visible through the cotton fabric of his t-shirt. 

“you say that like i have a choice, baby.” he replies. “i can’t just sit aside while everyone else does seventy push-ups and ten laps around the field.”

you let out a disgruntled noise and hugged him even tighter, as if you were trying to mold your body into his. 

“and you like it. admit it.” yukhei teases. 

“i do.” you murmur. “you smell so good, by the way.” 

yukhei giggles at how quickly you switched the topic.

“it’s that detergent you’re using. i wish my clothes smelled this nice when i’m there.” 

“i’m talking about you, bub. the way you smell. my hoodie doesn’t smell like that anymore.” 

“the way i smell?” yukhei laughs. “and i think you mean my hoodie.” 

“it’s been mine for a while now.”

“well, wanna give it back to me? since it lost its purpose.” 

“okay. i’ll trade it for this shirt.” 

you tug on the hem of his shirt as you look up at him, eagerly waiting for his response. it’s moments like this where yukhei wonders if you know you have him in the palm of your hand.

“whatever you want, baby. i’ll give it to you.”

the lovestruck smile on his face widens as he places a kiss on your forehead, drawing circles on your back. 

“can i have it now then?” you ask innocently, but yukhei’s ears pick up the hint of playfulness in your tone. 

“right now?” he asks.

“yeah. what’s stopping you?”

“oh, i’ll give it to you now.” yukhei tells you lowly.

the cheeky smile on your face morphs into an ‘o’ shape as his grip on your waist tightens, guiding you towards the bed where you both crash against the mattress. there’s a moment of silence as he hovers over you, suavely tugging his shirt off with one hand and dropping the crumpled fabric next to your face. 

“thanks.” you whisper.

it’s hard to ignore the way your core is perfectly aligned with his when you’re lying underneath him in a hoodie and a pair of grey boyshorts that have been testing his patience for a while now.

yukhei runs his hands up your thighs to your sides, bunching the hoodie up to your chest. wet open-mouthed kisses are left all over the smooth expanse of your tummy and he takes delight in how hard you’re breathing.

“it’s no problem, baby.” he replies nonchalantly, his fingers pulling at the waistband of your boyshorts. “anything else you want before i take this off?”

you shake your head and shoot him a silly smile, and it’s all yukhei can remember before he embarks on yet another mission to please you with his mouth. then he makes love to you again, his warm touch roaming every inch of your body which he memorises to perfection. 

later, when you’re both sated and holding onto each other like two long-lost lovers, yukhei dreams of you again. this time, he’s hiding another velvet box in an even bigger bouquet of roses as he sits nervously in a dimly lit living room, waiting to surprise you when you get home. 

the thought of you being his forever is enough to make him smile in reality, enough to push him through the upcoming months of separation. yukhei was more than ready to be done with that. 

--

it’s only been a minute since you’ve gotten home but the place already feels too big for one person — which is laughable because your apartment isn’t even that huge to begin with. now that yukhei is gone, it feels as if life has been sucked out of these four walls. it has reverted back to nothing more than a roof over your head and a living space for one.

after hanging your coat up and stepping out of your shoes, you stroll to the kitchen and lean against the counter, staring into thin air with the refrigerator whirring softly behind you.

even though it’s only three in the afternoon, it has been an awfully long day for you. the few hours you spent outside drained you and all you did was sit at a restaurant with yukhei and his family for one last meal before sending him off at the train terminal. 

the meal was nice and the send-off was not as bad as you thought it would be. but it was still an emotional farewell and you shed a few tears despite it being nowhere as difficult as the first time he had to leave you. 

you and yukhei stood at the train platform hand in hand until the train finally arrived and came to a stop in front of everyone. 

you let ten and kun attack your boyfriend with their bro hugs first, followed by mrs wong who affectionately caressed her son’s face and repeated her fifth “take care of yourself, my little soldier boy” of the day, and lastly, a less-emotional mr wong who gave his son a few encouraging pats on the back.

looking around, you were filled with dread as you watched the same thing happen with every other soldier who was hugging their loved ones and waving goodbye to them.

when everyone left and when it was just you and him again, yukhei instantly pulled you into his arms, clearly just as reluctant as you are to face this moment.

this was it.

he pulled back, cupping your cheeks and smiling at you forlornly. you stared back at him, taking in how smart he looked in his uniform and the beret framing his beautifully sunkissed face, and mustered all the strength in you to not cry. 

it was impossible. tears swelled in your eyes within seconds and you couldn’t help it, the harder you tried to force them away, the more they wanted to spill out. you silently chided yourself for how naive you were to have wished for a tear-free farewell.

“don’t cry, baby.” yukhei pleaded softly, his big eyes looking watery too. “remember what i said?”

you swiped your tears away with the sleeve of your turtleneck and nodded frantically, not trusting your voice at the moment. 

“i’m gonna come home to you. we’re going to live our lives together.”

his voice was soft yet grounded with conviction, calming you down instantly and offering you the consolation you needed. 

“i’ll be waiting for you.” your voice croaked and you rolled your eyes at how pathetic it sounded.

“i know you’ll be.” yukhei smiled, gently stroking your back. “and you’ll be getting your first letter really soon, i promise.” 

“something else i get to look forward to.” 

you tightened your arms around him, closing your eyes to really savour what it felt like to be in his arms one last time before forcing yourself to let go. 

yukhei interlocked your hand with his, pressing a kiss to the back of it and stealing a glance at your favourite ring.

“i love you so much.” you said, adjusting the collar of his uniform thoughtfully. “eat well and be safe, okay? don’t worry about me. you know you can call me—”

he intercepted you with a long kiss to your lips, letting go only when you pinched his arm. unlike him, you weren’t bold enough to be this affectionate in public. 

“i will.” yukhei answered breathlessly. “promise me you’ll sleep early and not overwork yourself while i’m away. i need you to take care of yourself too.” 

“i promise.” you mumbled, locking your pinky with his as you looked around anxiously. “you should get going now. don’t want you missing your train.” 

he squeezed your hand to bring your attention back to him. “i love you.” 

“love you too.”

and with a final kiss to your lips, his hand loosened from yours, reaching for his haversack on the ground and swinging it over his shoulder in one go. 

“text me once you’ve settled down?”  

“i will, baby.” 

after one last peck to your forehead, he turned around and trudged towards the edge of the train platform, where kunhang had been taking pictures with his sisters while waiting. you stood rooted to the ground as you watched your boyfriend’s figure become smaller, waving at him when he turned around to look at you one final time before getting onto the train. 

ten and kun kindly gave you a lift home afterwards. you nearly teared up again when you walked past the parking lot and spotted the two of them patiently waiting for you in the comfort of their heated car. on the way home, they even made dinner plans and insisted you didn’t spend the rest of the day alone — which you were extremely grateful for. 

you still have a few hours to yourself before meeting them, and it dawns on you that you should probably take a short nap after the sad amount of sleep you got last night. so you force yourself to stop moping and drag yourself to your bedroom to find a comfy set of clothes.

you spend what feels like hours under the hot shower that by the time you step out of the steamy bathroom, the skin of your fingers are wrinkly. just as you start combing your hair, your phone buzzes, its screen lighting up to show you a single notification. 

you whisk it off the table, gaping at the sight of yukhei’s name staring back at you. 

[from: yukhei][sent at 4:10PM]

hey baby i miss you ♥

[to: yukhei][sent at 4:10PM]

miss you too :(

you guys back there already?

[from: yukhei][sent at 4:11PM]

we’re still on the train

i didn’t get to nap. kunhang snored so loudly :(

[to: yukhei][sent at 4:11PM]

poor baby… 

[from: yukhei][sent at 4:11PM] 

it’s fine

your boyfriend is a strong man. a day without a nap is nothing :D

you snort at his reply. the typing icon appears next to his name so you wait for his next text. 

[from: yukhei][sent as 4:12PM]

anyway, i left a surprise in your desk drawer for you

i think you already know what it is ;)

you don’t. 

[from: yukhei][sent at 4:12PM]

i hope you like it baby ♥ 

you never know what to expect from yukhei because he’s always surprising you with the sweetest, most meaningful gestures. even the story behind your promise ring has you in wonder still. when you pull open the drawer and realise just what he had left for you, a huge grin spreads across your face and you take a second to appreciate the sight of it. he was truly something else.

there, carefully placed on top of the paperwork you had kept in the drawer, is an envelope with your name on it.

“yeah. you’ll be getting your first letter really soon, i promise.” 

you reach for it, immediately peeping inside when you notice it’s unsealed. there was indeed a letter as yukhei had promised. you recognize the lined paper that he clearly tore off from one of your notebooks and assume he wrote this secretly while you were sleeping. the mental image of that melts your heart. 

to _____, my favourite girl in the world.

i have been staring at this blank piece of paper for ten minutes now while you’re sleeping so peacefully. i still don’t know what i should write for my first letter, so here’s an old-fashioned love letter from your admirer for life, your boyfriend, and your future husband: me <3 

you giggle to yourself like an idiot. it’s funny how a single paragraph could switch your mood instantly, how yukhei manages to make you happy even though he’s so far away now. 

was that too cheesy? i’m sorry. you know i’m not a poetic person even though i wish i am. you’ll probably laugh as you read on but that’s okay, because i want you to be happy whenever you read this. 

so where should i begin? 

how about the first time we met? when i saw you sitting at the back of mum’s restaurant, i had butterflies in my stomach (is this how that phrase goes?) and quickly hid in the kitchen. do you remember? 

the smile on your face grew as you continued reading yukhei’s letter. it spoke of the vivid details of all your firsts in your relationship, of the little habits you have that he adores. of the warmth and safeness he feels when he’s around you, of how in awe and inspired he is by you — and how lucky he is to get to experience all that for the past few years and hopefully, the rest of his life. 

by the time you reach the end, you’re laughing and crying. you miss him so much.

i love you, _____. nothing else matters. you’re the light of my life and i hope i can keep making you feel the way you make me feel: safe, happy, and loved. 

until we meet again,

wong yukhei

p.s. i hope you’re not crying. and if you are i really hope it’s because i made you laugh too much. 

you reread the letter again, letting his voice linger in your head for a bit because you’re not ready to let it go yet. then you laid on the bed for a good fifteen minutes as you stared at the ceiling with his letter clasped to your chest, yearning for his presence all over again. 

it’s going to be fine, you tell yourself. you can handle a few months without him. after all, you already have. and he’s never completely away from you, you realise, as you hold your hand up and admire the gorgeous ring shining in the afternoon sunlight. 

for now, that’ll do. 

--

#wong yukhei #lucas wong #wayv scenarios #lucas scenarios #nct scenarios #wayv smut #wayv fluff #wayv imagines #wayv x reader #nct imagines #nct smut #nct fluff #lucas fluff #lucas smut #lucas x reader #yukhei smut #yukhei fluff #kpop scenarios #kpop fluff #kpop smut

[vminity21]

Beyond the Facade | knj

Pairing: handyman!namjoon X preacherskid!reader, bestfriend!taehyung X pregnant!reader, f2l!au

Word Count: 10,958

Genre: mysterious/angst/fluff/smut

Warning(s): strong language use, semi-detailed childbirth, mention of infidelity, alluding of a love triangle, evidence of a sheltered background, angst involving family matters, smut, losing virginity, unprotected sex, oral (f receiving), nipple play, hand groping, lots of flashbacks but that is the point of the story i sorry; Rated: 18+

Summary: A sheltered life leads to harbored secrets that are buried in order to protect someone you are falling in love with. As the time is nearing for the life growing inside you to be welcomed into the world, the reminiscences of all the moments unfold to reveal a beautiful story that needed to be told.

Credits to: @suhdays​ for making such a phenomenal header! The talent she has never ceases to amaze me!

The graying of the clouds is all you can see beyond your window other than the panging rain droplets now trickling upon the glass. Arm resting against your forehead, your lips press into a straight line in response to the series of thoughts circling your mind. Carefully, you slide your palms upon the mattress in an attempt to sit up, wanting to see more of the view besides the crying sky. Knuckles curling to rub your tired eyes, you furrow your brows, the comforting warmth of the bed covers remain tangled between your shins. Leafless trees border the side of the building save for a small swing set; a paved section decorated with a basketball hoop where a large shed stands many feet across from it. If one is to step outside the front of the structure, there sits a church surrounded by a gravel parking lot where the neighboring land hosts a barbed wire fence with an abandoned house and field.

It's been four months since you deemed the fellowship hall your home, and appreciatively, the area has been vacant since the falling of the church which saves even more stress than what you've been in since moving here. Achingly, your legs stretch to move off the bed before your feet land onto the grainy carpet. Your right-hand slips to steady your back, maneuvering your body to scoot to the bed frame, which has become a daily routine, weak fingers gripping the wood until your digits become pale white. Letting out a steady sigh, with all your strength you lift yourself to where you can stand, "Oomf," a small whimper escapes past your lips, tensing at the cringe plaguing your shoulders.

Being seven months pregnant sometimes has its perks, but this isn't one of them. Bending your body forward slightly, you step sluggishly toward your dresser, pulling out maternity clothes lent to you before the move.

"So, when are you going to tell us?" The soft murmur belonging to your mother echoes from the driver's side. Her expression submits an evident mixture of exhaustion and exasperation; though it's been a month since the announcement of your pregnancy, your mother is currently driving you to a doctor's appointment for a checkup on the baby to make sure everything is okay, "we have a right to know."

Arms crossed over your chest in mild annoyance, you bite the corner of your mouth until the side of your head meets the window, getting lost in the line of trees zipping by.

Waddling into the bathroom, the vague memory fades, your hand reaching to turn the knob of the shower. The squeaky sound along with rushing water splatters against the shower curtain sending a soothing jolt of excitement. Chilly air springs goosebumps over your limbs once you're freed of your clothes, waiting patiently for the water to warm before inching into the tub. When steaming liquid soon dribbles among your frame, a grin of satisfaction sparks brief happiness you needed an escape to. The heat of the downpour eases your aching bones, fingers clasping behind your neck to lean your head back, "Oh!" You gasp in surprise when the instant feel of a kick happens within your tummy. Eyes flutter down in the direction of your swollen belly, palms moving to caress it, "Look at you, what are you trying to do? Escape?" Cooing with a light giggle, when the baby kicks again, you can't help the giddy smile tugging at the corner of your lips. Now, this- this is what you love about being pregnant. Finishing up, you dry your hair before swiftly dressing along with brushing your teeth.

Thoughts still pertaining to the small life growing inside you, you've decided since your first doctor's visit that you do not want to know your baby's gender until the day that you give birth. When you presented the idea to your mother, she was all on board, proclaiming how she had done that with your younger sibling. Running a brush through your hair, you skim one final look into the mirror formerly then head to exit the bathroom.

Gradually sauntering through the mini hallway, you're more zoned on the way your hand pats upon the wall in some form of maintaining stableness to the point you hardly notice almost slamming into a tall figure.

"Oh shit, I'm so sorry!" A deep voice panics, raising his arms in a way to catch you though your arms mirror the same. Heart ramming, a breath of relief winds past your parted lips- your eyes scanning the slim legs that follow to the handsome face of Kim Namjoon. His eyes enlarged apologetically.

"Oh Namjoon, you scared me," a tender chuckle sets the feel of calm for he sees the amnesty etched in your eyes.

"I'm so sorry, [Y/N], I was about to head out to mow the lawn, but just wanted to check and make sure you're okay," he timidly scopes the view of your huge abdomen, gulping once his hands rest loosely at his sides, returning his eyes to search yours before a sweet grin spreads upon your face.

"It's no biggie. Thank you for checking on me,"

His dimples show from the way his lips press in a tight smile, nodding in reply, timorously turning to waltz to the outdoors in preparation of the day ahead. You watch until he disappears from your line of vision; the creep of a blush burning from your chest to your cheeks. Raking your hands through your hair, you force yourself once again to deny the attraction seeping through your soul thankful your blush attacked after he left.

Kim Namjoon works for your father, making sure the church grounds continuously stay clean and cut creating a pretty environment to the eye. Protecting the land is another part of the job description- protecting it from any loiterers, wild animals, protesters, etcetera- maintaining flower bushes encircling the area as well as mini projects your father will want Namjoon to build. The swing set, including the shed, happen to be plans that Namjoon successfully constructed due to your father's wishes. In return, Namjoon is provided a place to live- the room that once held your father's office, is now changed into a bedroom.

It's strange for you to think about it now- how so much has changed in just seven months, when a year ago the church was thriving, unaware of the secrets that clouded within the audience. Squeezing your eyes shut, a reminiscent from the beginning of your pregnancy rears its head causing a tiny brink of nausea to form.

Taehyung's arms drape around you tightly, embracing you in all entirety that your eyes shut against the crook of his neck. Your fingers squeeze his shoulder, legs bent across his thighs while tepid tears spill onto your cheeks.

"Shhh," he tries to comfort, his breath tickling your exposed ear- your face still buried beneath his chin, "It's going to be okay," he whispers just as soft as the flicking fire burning amongst numerous candle wicks. Scents of vanilla blends with birch fitting the dimly lit bedroom that you're thankful exists other than the man refusing to let you go until you feel better.

"How?" You choke back another sob, "How am I going to tell my parents? How am I supposed to confront the church if that's what it comes down to? Shit... My dad is going to fucking kill me," Taehyung's shirt is soaked, but he could care less, tangling his long fingers into your hair to stroke the back of your head.

"Okay, now, you're being dramatic,"

"So, maybe I am? But you know very well that my parents aren't going to take this lightly,"

"Yeah, but I think it's safe to say that telling your parents you're pregnant is far better than if you were to tell them how you truly feel about religion,"

"Okay? Perhaps, you're right," a snippet of a frustrated huff leaves your trembling lips, "especially not with what's been going on with the church, I don't know how much more they can take,"

"Well, your dad should have thought of that before he had an affair with my mom," Taehyung's icy tone brings chills to your frame before he loudly swallows, lips firm from the anger boiling behind his almond eyes. Tendrils of his bright, red hair glow regardless of how dark the atmosphere is, and you hardly hold back the sheer pain stabbing your heart from the guilt you can't help but endure.

"Tae, I'm so so sorry,"

"Hey," he peers down at you, realizing he may have taken his comment too far, even though you're just as angry towards your father as your best friend is, "you didn't know," sniffling back the remaining mucus clogging your nostrils, you desire to face Taehyung no matter how foolish you think you may look, scooting your body to where your palm indents in his mattress next to his legs, his arm now rests around your waist, and for a split second, you're close enough to where the tempting appearance of his striking face beckons the strange glimmer of longing. A longing of curing whatever loneliness you're going through, but you're not the only one experiencing this moment for Taehyung's lips part just enough to plead your attention.

You can't stop yourself, and you don't, because before either of you comprehend, you close the gap letting the delicate wave of his kiss caress yours. "Tae," you breathe against his lips, reuniting with his kiss almost immediately while a dizzy spell of want travels through your chest. You know this isn't right. He knows this isn't right, but too many pent-up emotions between your hearts have gotten out of hand, and for now, all the two of you have is each other. His fingertips move to tenderly trail your jaw, gasping into his mouth when the tip of his tongue circles yours before you move to trap him in a perfect straddle. You need something, anything to feel whole again- something to forget about the people you lost and the people you will lose. And, if there's anyone in this world you do not want to lose it's him.

There's no refraining, there's no hesitation, just the growing pace of the kisses, and the way you're so enthralled with how beautiful he feels squeezing you tighter to him. "[Y/N]," he moans, hating himself for how far he wants to go with you, yet he craves your touch, nearly supplicates for it. You want to feel his skin, and the aching throb below you seems to deafen any other screams of stopping, and yet, your fingers move to the end of his shirt, peeling it just enough to expose the solid wall of his abdomen. "[Y/N]," he stops you, breaking the final kiss, his hand covering your wrist, while your eyes frantically search the side of his face, "We- we can't,"

You haven't seen him since, because of the boundaries that were crossed and would have been farther crossed if Taehyung had not had the strength to stop. The pair of you have been best friends since childhood, and neither of you wants to take anything beyond for the sake of feeling empty, but he assured you that night, even after your panic of apologies pouring from your mouth, after the humiliation that shackled your system, even after the daunting assumption that your friendship was over- he cupped your cheek, promising that he was still here and that he would never end your attachment over something, you both will never regret.

It's a secret you've suppressed for some time. Taehyung calls every so often when he can; dealing with his broken-hearted father on top of two jobs consumes every bit of his time. Yet, you can't help but miss him, the one person who loyally stayed by your side even when you came forward to your friends about your pregnancy. And, the one friend who still loves you all the same, even after discovering his mother's affair with your father.

Rage isn't enough to describe the resentment against your father, and ever since you told your parents that you were expecting, and ever since your move, you haven't spoken to him. You'll never forget how torn your mother was- depression weighing heavy on her, and that's something that's hard to forgive.

Your mother looks frail as she twiddles the crumpled tissue in her hands. Tears brim her eyes through the silence in the car, sparse sniffles breaking your heart into a million pieces. The two of you had just come back from the grocery store to restock the kitchen in your recently new home and are now parked at the church's back door to drop you off. You hesitated upon leaving because the thought of your mother having to return home to a place of remorse is the last thing you want for her. The promise of a car was granted to you, but you turned it down, refusing to accept anything from the man who caused so much pain to your family. To Taehyung's family.

Running the tissue underneath her eyes, she speaks, "[Y/N]?"

"Yeah?" Your voice is barely a whisper, but the guilt from how stressed your mother has been is something you wish you could carry instead of her. After the betrayal of your father as well as him resigning from the church to send people away from the place they once sought refuge in- on top of her oldest daughter being pregnant with her first child is already a lot to handle. The other frustration you bite your tongue from expressing is the fact of your parents refusing to let you get a job until the time after you give birth. You want to make the money to provide for yourself and your son or daughter without the dependence upon your parents- your mother especially, yet you're grateful for her adamancy on keeping you from any risks outside of the walls of your home.

It takes a moment before your mother gathers her words, "Do you- do you think you could ask Namjoon to help take you to the hospital? Whenever it's time... for you to have the baby?"

It was easier for your mother to ask that of you because he lived in the same building, and if any emergency of your water breaking happened earlier than expected, at least you would have someone available to take you to the hospital. Your gaze clears from the zone out you've had the whole time standing in the entrance of the hallway before Namjoon left. Turning on a heel, you decide to return to your bed, slipping under the covers- you're too wide awake to sleep as of now, yet the foam of the mattress eases the soreness of your back once you lean against the pillows.

-Four months earlier-

Queasiness envelops your abdomen to where you recognize the cue, rushing to the porcelain throne to heave whatever yellow liquid is left- spurting it into the toilet while you grimace through the pain. The door swings open behind you mixed with heavy footsteps quickening to you. When large hands swoop to hold your hair back, you don't have the strength to look at the intruder due to the continuous retching that deems you defenseless.

"It's okay, it's okay," the deep voice is soft, and relief brings tears to your eyes when you recognize it to be Kim Namjoon. You're embarrassed once your stomach gives you a break, your palms pressing to your forehead while you slump against the wall.

"I'm so sorry," you whisper, swiping your mouth with the back of your hand. Namjoon scatters to find a tissue, patting the corners of your lips.

"You don't have to be sorry,"

"That... wasn't what I was apologizing for,"

A knowing glance is all he must give for you to share whatever thoughts you can't bring yourself to voice. He was your friend before all of this, yet you failed to mention to him about the pregnancy, and with him being the worker of the Church- he didn't discover your budding stomach until the day you moved in. His eyes flicker away from your stare toward the slight protrusion of your baby bump due to your ruffled t-shirt. He settles on the floor across from you, silence being the only conversation held. He isn't one to hold anger, and though you kept him unaware until your third month of pregnancy, he refuses to leave your side, making a pact to himself he will do whatever it takes to provide the care that you will need. As well as the little one.

Despite the emotional roller coaster, you remain amazed with how he keeps his patience with you. A day of depression to a random bout of laughter- memories turning of the betrayals of close friends who judged you immediately the day you put your trust in them- the freedom you craved away from the sheltered life your father forced upon you- even days where you can't seem to put your tears on pause, yet Namjoon holds you through every grieve.

"What if... what if I'm not good enough?" Your voice shakes between sobs- you had been dreaming restlessly yet another night, tossing within your bed to the point Namjoon came to check on you- rushing to pull you into his arms the moment your eyes fluttered to reveal pained tears. Your words nearly shatter him- pulling away just enough to where his eyes lock with yours.

"How can you say that, [Y/N]?" The faint light of your lampshade causes his face to glisten- angelically, you decide, yet the shadowing doubt of motherhood plagues you still, because what if you genuinely can't care for the child that you're six months away from holding? Fears encompass you like an ocean, smashing along your mind in harsh waves. "Look at me," are the words that snap you from whatever sea you were suffocating in to realize you had unintentionally switched your gaze from him. It's the calming effect the warmth of Namjoon's eyes bring when he exposes whatever faith he has in the woman you are and will become. "You're going to do just fine, believe me, I know it,"

Sniffling, you run the back of your hand along your chin where an escapee of a tear dangled, "How can you be so sure?"

"Because when have you ever given up on anyone that you care about," it's not a question, he's stating what he knows to be a fact. Something he learned of you when he first was hired to tend to the property. "You're stubborn when it comes to winning someone over. I was determined not to befriend anyone here. But you changed that for me, remember?"

A knowing tug of a smile trembles into a stretch upon your lips, "I do,"

"Same with the baby. I know you will love that little one more than life itself. It doesn't have a choice, and you'll let him or her know the second they're born,"

When a hearty snicker leaves your mouth, you notice the sticky feel of your drying face- you are no longer crying.

"You don't have to do this alone, [Y/N]. You showed me that even when I didn't know what else to do. Now, get some rest, okay? You have a doctor's appointment bright and early," the bed creaks from the gradual movement of Namjoon standing,

"Wait!" You speak before you can stop yourself, Namjoon immediately pausing- the heat of his arms is felt beneath your palms from your pounce of panic, and with evident chagrin, you shyly stare at his chest, "Can you uh, ... Can you stay in here with me tonight?" You've refrained from asking sooner due to the shame of not telling him the news that's become apparent, and even now, you haven't been able to comprehend how he's not the slightest bit angry with you. When his arms encircle you closer to his frame, no words need to be said because he's already answered by just this gesture. Nuzzling into his embrace, the side of his chin pressed to your forehead, "Whoever it is, I hope they grow up to be half the person that you are," you whisper, squeezing him tighter, infinite smiles now ending the night that cures any ounce of uncertainty.

By the fifth month of pregnancy, you finally come to the realization of how selfish you have been- it's no longer about you and your needs; it is now about the needs of your son or daughter growing within you. Namjoon catered to every grocery store trip, stocking the kitchen and in return, you choose to cook for him every meal, hoping to show as much appreciation to him that you can.

"Have you thought about any names?" Taehyung's voice muses on the other line of the phone, the sound of him bringing a small smirk upon your face. You've missed him terribly so, yet the acceptance of surprise phone calls is all you can settle with for now. At his question though, you pause with the tilt of your head, taking a quick sip of the broth that you're currently heating on the stove.

"No?" It's a brief question of guilt, something you haven't been ready to ponder, "Honestly... haven't thought that far ahead yet," you add in the vegetables to boil within the broth.

The familiar, deep chuckle is all you hear to gain an idea of what your best friend is about to say next, "I should have known,"

"Alright, Birkenstocks. What do you mean by that?"

"Breezing past that mistake. You named your Parakeet, Bird,"

"Well, in my defense, I was seven years of age,"

"And in my defense, playing basketball in Birkenstocks was supposed to start a trend,"

"Since how? I-"

"Ask Hoseok,"

"You lost a bet didn't you-"

"And, I will pay for it for the rest of my life, now won't I?"

"With me around, you will,"

Hoseok is the deacon's son who's dream of fashion has been shunned by his family, yet he designs in a sketchbook Taehyung hides for whenever Hoseok and he share the same work shifts. He's not one you have had the opportunity to communicate much with, but you're thankful Taehyung has someone to maintain a friendship with while you two have been apart. A short response of silence settles while your cheek and shoulder squeeze the phone for a moment as you stir the steaming vegetables.

"You could have named the bird, Tweety at least-"

"Oh!" You playfully growl, "Back with that again, huh?"

"Do I need to send you a link of baby names-"

"I promise you, Tae, I do not plan on naming my child, Kid, okay?"

"You'd be surprised-"

Taehyung's excitement for his future Godchild brings a simmering joy to the surface of your pattering heart. Almost as equal to the eagerness, your mother has shown with this being her first grandchild. Graciously, your mother has never been as strict as your father, hence why the past five months have gone much smoother then they would have if your father had never had an affair with Mrs. Kim.

The phone call ends whenever dinner is finished, and by that time, Namjoon scuffles through the door- the outdoorsy scent drifts to your nose while you place the sweltering bowls of soup on the table. Namjoon shimmers his feet from his work boots before hanging his coat, timidly glimpsing in your direction to confirm you're okay.

Small talk ensues with the typical questions of how each of your days has gone once the pair of you take your seats. One secret, yet another you and Taehyung have harbored, is the awareness of Namjoon's atheism- something your father must never learn of his worker. Namjoon, who will not admit it, works on the church grounds in order to provide for his family who lives a few miles up the road. Ultimately, there are many secrets not worth sharing to your parents, not only for the sake of sanity but for the protection of the ones who you've kept close, especially Namjoon. With your father being the tyrant of a priest, he used to be, there is still the potential distress of him firing Namjoon over the mere difference of beliefs. Something you refuse to let happen while you're around.

Clinking spoons replace conversation, for how long, you're uncertain; the fog of your thoughts seem to consume upon one in particular- something that has remained festering long enough, yet you have never said it aloud- figuring this moment may be the time that you do. Namjoon confided in you and Taehyung once he found comfort in trusting the pair of you- even subjects that one would have never expected him to open about. Guilt presents itself to the point your eyes squeeze shut, opening them to move your spoon to play at a piece of broccoli swimming in the potage.

"They don't know," your words are careful- slow even- continuing your vision on the dinner before you. You can feel Namjoon's soft eyes on you, his expression confused. "They don't know who the father is," that's when your gaze trails to meet his eyes just for more guilt to manifest behind them. By they, you're referring to your parents, as well as every other soul excluding Taehyung, "I won't tell them." Namjoon slowly nods with the sense of understanding, knowing the cost that will be taken if your father were to know who you're trying to bury beneath this web of fear. "Besides," you sigh heavily, "I'm surprised my father was lenient enough to let me live here," you confess, "if he wasn't so guilty over the affair, I would be homeless-"

"I wouldn't let that happen," Namjoon says suddenly, destroying whatever anger you were dwelling upon. Your mouth falls open in shock at his words and the frilly flutter of your heartbeat is hard to ignore. After living here for two months, he's proven time and time again that he means what he says; what he just said. Speechless, the rest of dinner continues in fond silence, your heart refusing to steady for the man slowly captivating your heart.

The sixth month of pregnancy gifts swollen feet and aching bones on top of your belly growing heavier by the week. Namjoon has stayed loyal- tending to your pregnancy cravings in the dead of night, aiding to your discomfort whether it involves a heating pack or a cup of ice, slipping under the covers on nights you want him to hold you, driving you to every doctor's appointment without any hesitation; with all that he's been doing for you, it's like your feelings have blossomed deeper which you know shouldn't be happening with the peril of your father finding out. The unexpected visits from your father are few, yet you usher the reminder to yourself of protecting Namjoon, though he carries the weight of facing your father instead of you who avoids the confrontation.

Night comes quickly after a day spent cleaning up the nursery that seems to be coming together, other than the crib Namjoon's been building- something you accidentally discovered when strolling close to the shed one sunny day. He's so dedicated to the unborn infant, it nearly brings you to tears, glancing around the elegant hues of multiple pastel colors painted across the room with stuffed animals, blankets, and furniture he continues to gift you amongst different items your mother has added to the collection. You always enjoy the sporadic visits from your mother, because she's free to celebrate the life that she refuses to consider as a sin.

"Are you thinking boy or girl?" Your mother elbowed your side earlier today after moving around the furniture.

"Hm," you hummed happily, thankful for the relationship that's being redeemed with her, "you know? I'm not very sure,"

"I can tell from all the colors you've chosen," she teased, "it looks beautiful," she cooed, pulling you into an accomplished side hug. You didn't want to stick to just pink or blue, so you chose every other shade in between, colliding the space with colors that could go for either or. "You're going to be a wonderful mother,"

The sound of the front door opens distracting you from the former memory, staring down at the table that now rests heaping plates of chicken and rice. The fellowship hall used to be filled with numerous rows of horizontal tables mingled with circular ones where the crowd would come to camaraderie to joyful hymnals, delicious food, reflected testimonies without any warning of the secrecies soon floating to the surface. Now a solo table, the one planted before you, pairs with a few sparse chairs just enough to seat at least four people.

"Hiya," you greet, trying to ignore the subtle increase of your heartbeat. Namjoon flashes a kid-like smile once he shutters out of his jacket, "How was your day?"

"It was good, thank you," he replies, taking long strides until he makes it to you, "How was yours with your mom?" His right-hand steadies the small of your back while his left one clutches yours to help settle you into your seat. It's hard to focus on the question he just asked when the scent from outside seems to heighten the attraction you already feel towards him, "It was good," you manage to say, reaching for the silverware to begin digging into your food, "Thank you... For helping me," the distance between your stomach and the table now is something you've been trying to get used to as well as the turmoil of trying to stand and sit.

"Anytime."

A blush floods your cheeks when he holds your timorous stare, so you avert your eyes to your dinner, letting the obvious feeling of Namjoon watching deepen the red shade on your skin. A few minutes disappear into time before you feel a shove against your abdomen from the inside. Your hand instinctively flies to press upon the baby bump, Namjoon jumping at the motion, stopping mid-chew, while his eyes enlarge in surprise.

"It's okay," you chortle at his reaction, "it's just the baby kicking," his response reminds you of the moment you felt the baby kick for the very first time- similar to a weird flutter that's hard to describe, and it had taken you a second to realize what it was exactly- just your baby making its presence known to you. Namjoon swallows the bite of food in a nervous gulp, the pang of his silverware mutes from where he lays it on the napkin.

"Here," you murmur affectionately preparing to stand to your feet. Namjoon immediately jolts from his chair, rounding the table to gather your hand in his. Instead of relying on his strength to help you position yourself, you plop back onto the seat, sliding his hand to the area where the baby kicked a few minutes prior. Namjoon kneels to level with you, his plump lips ajar mirroring the widen stance of his eyes while he patiently waits, his nervous heart pounding in his temples. It's the exuberant joy in his smile that meets his eyes in a dazzling glow the pure second the baby kicks again, and the bliss of delight smothers your heart in so many ways imaginable at this moment the pair of you are capturing together. Your hand remains resting upon his while your eyes lock repudiating from breaking contact.

"I told you that you don't have to do this alone," he whispers, and it's then you come to the awareness of how near his face is from yours, his dimples visible from his smile to the point you press your lips to each one, shocked at your act of boldness, but you can't refrain. He's too handsome and too wonderful to stay away from any longer. That's all the invitation needed, for Namjoon's lips brush yours igniting the sparks of what you've been trying to suppress for way too long. Your fingers find his hair when he leans to deepen the kiss, moving his hands to rest on the chair, fingers pressing into the wood until pale white.

At this moment, you don't care what anyone thinks.

You are in love with Kim Namjoon, and there is nothing in this world that's going to scare you away from that.

-Present day-

The pitch black outside the window brings frustration when you awaken to scold yourself for how long you've slept. Gathering yourself once the fatigue rolls off, you cautiously sit up, scooting to the bedpost until you're on your feet. Taking a trip to the restroom, you notice upon exiting the clock on the wall reads seven pm, and you wonder if Namjoon has made it inside for the evening. It's eerily quiet save for the air conditioning, but you pause when you see the lights are on in the main area of the building. Shrugging, you waddle around the corner until the sudden shouts of, "SURPRISE!", nearly knocks you to the ground.

Gasping, your eyes widen while your hand flies to your chest. A prolonged second interferes before your brain deciphers the two individuals cheering before you. Numerous pink and blue balloons hover to the top of the ceiling matching the colors of a cloth decorating the one table now adorned with a cake and wrapped gifts. "What?" You can barely speak from the light headiness taking over, but the tears that well in your eyes when you see the boxy smile of your best friend sends you in an attempt to run just to crash into his arms. He meets you halfway, surrounding you within his embrace as he rocks you back and forth muffling your wails of joy into his checkered sweater. Your soaked cheeks are wiped away from the material as been done countless times before, and his tepid palms squish your cheeks when he steps back to gesture toward your belly.

"Wow look at you! Your belly is huge!"

"I'm still in denial of how fast this pregnancy is going!" You say breathlessly, you're so happy to see Taehyung, you can hardly contain your composure. Namjoon steps forward with his hand reaching to squeeze your best friend's shoulder. Taehyung's fiery strands are curled upon his forehead, lustrous beneath the lights as it always has before, "Your father let you come?" There's a seriousness behind your voice at the question because you are cognizant of the fury Tae's father has against the church from the events that occurred what, in some ways feels like a lifetime ago.

"Well, no," Taehyung winces mischievously, "I told him that Namjoon and I were going to a basketball game,"

"Of course, you did, you sly fox,"

"You know you love me," Tae pecks your forehead before leading you to the table where the sweet whiff of cake flatters your nostrils.

"You guys didn't have to do this," you're still wiping tears off your face, though it's evident that your crying is from untainted gratitude, "What did I do to deserve the two of you?"

Namjoon kneels, intertwining his long fingers with yours, using the tip of his thumb to tickle circles upon your skin, "Taehyung mentioned how when you were kids that you loved surprises, especially if it involved a small party of some sort so," he tilts his head toward Taehyung, "And I knew how much you missed him, too. I just wanted to do something to celebrate you. And, the baby,"

It doesn't take much to smother this man in kisses nowadays, and once you express your thankfulness to the men before you, Namjoon reads your mind, snatching a small kiss in return.

"You two are on kissing terms, again?" Taehyung teases while you poke your tongue at him in mild embarrassment. Namjoon does not know of the moment you and Tae shared, and that's something you're not ready to talk about, and with the cutesy scrunch of Namjoon's face, the memory escapes to the back of your mind for now.

By the end of the night, the frosting had met all three of your faces- some smushed into Taehyung's hair while some swiped across Namjoon's neck, and your eyebrows are smeared along with the possible suspicion of some getting up your nose. Cleaning the mess takes a while, but nobody in the room would trade it for anything, and it's good stalling to prevent the night from completely ending.

Walking Taehyung to his car is the only dread overwhelming your system because you're not sure of when you will get to see him next. Tears flood your eyes, breaking Taehyung's heart as an awe of shame gusts past his lips, "I'm sorry, [Y/N]. My dad's expecting me home soon,"

"I don't want you to go," you choke, on the brink of bursting at the seams- Tae fumbles to tighten his arms behind your back- him trying to be mindful of your abdomen being pressed too firmly against his frame.

"Please don't cry," he whispers near your ear, "Please, please don't cry," His lips curl from the tears burning within his own eyes wishing with all his strength he could rid of the aching hurt that has kept your friendship separated. Tae swiftly pulls away when he remembers another present, he meant to give you earlier, whirling around to unlock his car, bending into the vehicle while his hands shuffle around the floorboard in a desperate search for whatever he wants to show you. When he turns to face you, a sharp inhale of glee echoes into the night- the lopsided plush of a heart is attached to a blue body ornamented with yellow polka dots that match its mouth. "Oh my gosh!" You squeal, "Tae, it's adorable! Where did you find this?"

Wiggling his eyebrows in pride, he hands it to you, "I made it myself. And," he pauses for effect, "since you have trouble naming things, I did the honors and named it for you. I introduce, Ta Ta."

"Ta Ta?"

"Yeah, like 'Ta Ta... for now,'"

"Just when I thought I couldn't love your dork of a self even more," you exhale, slamming your eyes shut just to bury your face further into his chest, not able to breathe in his scent from the clog of mucus stuffing your nose.

"I love you, too." His voice thickens with emotion, "Now, quit saying it like you're never going to see me again, because you know I'm not going anywhere."

"You promise?" Your cold nose moves to press into the corner of his jaw where steady breaths move between your parting mouth. It's a serene moment where he turns just enough to glimpse at you, engaging in the beauty he's always found within your heart. Taehyung's agape lips now rest centimeters from yours when his large hands raise to rest his fingertips along your flushed cheeks- the curls of his frizzy hair pressing to your forehead, prickling your closing eyes. You discover your free hand enfolding around his wrist from the daunting desire looming from what's been left unspoken, and the shiver in his breathing brushes your chin once the light touch of his nose cuddles to yours. You both stand there for a seeming reel of eternity, battling the inward mayhem of choice that's displayed itself on the invisible line tempting to be traversed.

"I promise."

He hadn't kissed you, but there was no denial that he wanted to, especially with the way your face has haunted his dreams since the night your lips met in emotional patterns of sorrow. But, deep down, he knows it's too obvious of a choice if the one for him is to be you, but the love that has been kept for you will never go away. The same as a tether of your heart will forever be his no matter how deep your love goes for someone else. Kim Taehyung will always be your poise- your muse- the soulmate of a friendship that you will always need.

Toddling to the nursery upon Tae's departure still presents the boiling tears from your tired eyes dripping off your cheeks as you set Ta Ta beside the koala plushie Namjoon gifted you; the humor involving the struggle of both Taehyung and Namjoon carrying the crib Namjoon built for the baby taunts a smirk at the corner of your lips. It's dark besides the faint light of the hallway behind you, giving you just enough to admire the scenery around you- sniffling back what you can before reaching to cover your quivering chin with your hand. You've missed Taehyung. You miss him. And, how beautiful of Namjoon to surprise you with your best friend's presence? Reuniting the three musketeers from once upon a time?

Little do they know, from the unearthing of your pregnancy to now, the two men have mended your broken heart and stitched it back together again piece by piece. You're highly uncertain of where you would be without them, and just the thought alone is one you refuse to dwell on. While memories turn like a spindle of loosened thread, a revelation halts you in your tracks. The thought rings loud and clear gracing a wide smile on your face while one more set of tears dampen the corner of your eyes.

After scolding yourself for so long for not thinking hard enough on the subject,

right here, hands grasping the handlebar of your future child's cradle,

you finally have a name picked out for your little one.

-

2 months later....

"Namjoon, I'll be fine," the pointed look you flash him prompts a nervous chuckle once his hands rest to rub gently along your sides. He's concerned as he's been almost the entire pregnancy, but of course, now his worries are heightened to an extreme, "I'm not due until next week. Don't worry,"

"I know," he groans, tugging you closer just enough to plant a warm to kiss to your neck, "But, I can't help it."

"I'll be fine," you drag the word with a teasing sound of a whine. Namjoon shaking his head at you with a smile you're now feeling upon your lips. "Mm," you hum into his kiss, your hands sliding to squeeze his shoulders in reaction to how impeccable it feels. You end the moment simply to gaze at him, "You'll be back before you know it," you assure him- his trip to the grocery store being the plan for the afternoon.

"Okay," he says tenderly, eyes flickering to your lips once more before leaning to brush them to his own, "I love you,"

There's a small pause, one that entails warmth smothering your chest in giddy sensations when his eyes steal yours after pulling away, "I love you, too, Joon," watching him head out the door until the truck disappears along the road.

Of course, the day doesn't go accordingly the way you expect, because on carefully prodding to the kitchen in preparation to cook breakfast, a slight ache ensues within your abdomen. "Oh," you groan, stroking the area with your fingertips before deciding to lay down for a bit instead. When reaching your room, the sharp pain of a cramp returns causing a harsh cringe as you lean against your bedpost, hardly able to concentrate on the attempt of climbing onto the mattress. You remain hunched over for five minutes, forcing slow breaths to prevent from panicking, and when you find the coast to be clear, you straighten yourself out.

Suddenly, before you can comprehend what's happening, a gush of water splatters onto the carpet soaking your feet in the process.

"No," you whisper, eyes frantically scanning your room for your cell phone. Namjoon shouldn't be far with the grocery store only being a few miles away, but in order to get a hold of him, you must find your only way of contacting him. Hands pat your bed, thrusting off the bed covers and shaking them roughly, yet no 'thump' is heard before you cast the covers in a pile onto the ground. The next destination leads to the restroom, with no luck of your phone being in your bedroom- when another wave of pain shoots within your stomach, you gasp, trying to endure through the discomfort with all your might.

Leaving a water trail behind with every step you take, you desperately search the countertops before stepping into the area that holds the kitchen, wondering if there is any possibility it may have been left behind there. Your feet meet the cool surface of the tile floor, your gape scanning the entirety of the space before a pant of relief escapes past your dry lips the second your shaking hands gather the device. "Agh!" A contraction surges, hands squeezing your phone unintentionally, yet you grimace just enough to maintain your focus on the task at hand. Managing to get the phone ringing, it doesn't take long until you hear the man of your dreams at the other end of the line.

"Hello?"

"Joon, it's time," you choke, voice thick with pain.

"Oh, shit! Hold on tight, I'm on my way, just hold tight, I'm coming-"

You just happen to be running by the church in favor of dropping off the work truck keys to your father when he unintentionally introduces you to the new employee you assume he plans to hire, "[Y/N], this is Kim Namjoon. He's going to be taking care of the church grounds for us, isn't that wonderful?"

"Hello, it's nice to meet you," you greet, underlyingly suffering from the attraction swarming to your reddening cheeks. When your father mentioned of hiring, you never anticipated the person to be this overwhelmingly breathtaking.

"It's nice to meet you too, Ma'am," Namjoon's polite nod mirrors the dimples evident from a soft grin, his hand reaching for yours to shake before your father continues the tour of the place you've grown up memorizing. But something initiates you to stay, eyes lingering on the back of the tall figure decked in a turtleneck covered by a green jacket complementing a pair of jeans along with brown shoes. There's a spark of intuition that day, one that ignited the prominent determination that you want to get to know this person even if your father ends up finding out.

Namjoon busts through the door with pure alarm etched in his voice, "[Y/N], I'm here! Baby, I'm right here," he immediately jumps to where you are, keeled over on the floor, throwing his arm around you until he lifts you out of the fellowship hall and into the work truck. Words you attempt to form are muted by whimpers, tears brimming your eyes from the pain that doesn't end, "I'm going to grab the suitcase, I'll be right back," time must be faster than you can measure for Namjoon arrives, slinging the suitcase into the backseat before slamming into the driver's side.

It takes a while for the newly found employee to warm up to every opportunity you take in order to get to know him. One thing he's slowly but surely learning is that you're not one to give up so easily- something you've noticed him picking up on, especially on days, you annoy him when he's on call to build a project. You make it clear to talk to him nonstop until he acknowledges your existence, and the times he doesn't breathe a word results in a call to Taehyung.

"Come help me," you plea hearing Taehyung's exasperated sigh on the other line.

"You are so annoying,"

"You know you love me, fool," you gloat because with defeat, your best friend reluctantly joins you, even accompanying a basketball just in case if Namjoon happens to fancy sports. Your girlfriends, Luna and Jo, were informed of your undying crush on the mysterious worker, crossing their arms in jealousy that you half-heartedly ignored.

"He doesn't even come to the services," Jo droned, "Don't you think it'd be best to get to know someone that's more... active in the church? Like the pianist's son, Min Yoongi. You two had such a cute relationship when you were three-"

You can't get past why no one seems to understand that you must win Namjoon over, and though Luna and Jo have seen the world along with you since childhood, you roll your eyes, turning on a heel, "I'll catch you later,"

Tires screech along the road while Namjoon swerves past cars on the highway, hands ghost white from the tight grasp he has upon the steering wheel. Meanwhile, your hand grips the bar above you while your other rests upon your belly- the keenness of getting to hold your baby in your arms is all you're thinking about other than Namjoon who's keeping you sane.

"Just a few more miles and we will be there. Just breathe," his voice is unsteady from the fright of this situation, but he upholds his enlarged gaze upon the road. He fumbles for his phone- trying to contact anyone from your family in order to tell them the news.

"GAH!" Leaning forward, a wail echoes within the vehicle as another contraction attacks.

"You guys aren't going to stop until I'm your friend, am I right?" Namjoon's elbows are folded from the hold he has on the basketball meeting his chest. Tae jumps sporadically in front of him with outspread arms preparing to prevent the ball from flying into the hoop.

"Damn straight," you shrug your shoulders in observation of Namjoon's tilting head.

"I thought church girls didn't cuss,"

"And I thought you'd have more game than the basketball," You retort.Tae halts, straightening his frame, eyes flickering between you and a quiet Namjoon, "Now hurry up. If you win, I will leave you alone for good. If Tae wins then we treat you to dinner and a movie. How does that sound?"

With an incredulous shake of his head, Namjoon smirks, "Okay," the scuffle of his converse is heard on the pavement when he briefly turns to toss the ball toward the hoop. The basketball pangs the ring, twirling ferociously to the point, your heart begins to sink, but to your pleasure, the ball tips off the rim, landing in a rejoicing Taehyung's arms.

"HAH!" You sprint, colliding into Taehyung's embrace while Namjoon tries to stifle the smile overtaking his lips, "Looks like it's going to be a burger and fries' kind of night," you wink, unaware of the hope that Namjoon has of wanting to gain your friendship just as much.

The hospital entrance appears after the rush of Namjoon turning into the parking lot soon helping you out of the truck. The suitcase will have to wait being he can retrieve it later, his ultimate goal is getting you within the building to where you're safe. "It's okay, it's okay," he tries to appear relaxed, but everything becomes a blur until a nurse with fluffy, black hair approaches with a wheelchair to help settle you in. His nametag reads 'JIMIN' – him rolling you quickly down the hall when the presence of a female nurse whose nametag reads 'MONNIE' helps you change into the nightgown upon arrival of the hospital room. Voices are mingling together from the pounding in your temples, but Monnie keeps her hands gentle on your back to lead you to the bed where she hooks you up to what seems like a million machines whilst providing as much comfort to you as possible.

Namjoon's calloused hand covers yours when one other nurse, Jungkook, floods the room, bringing a chair for him to sit in. You're not sure of all the commotion that's overwhelming the room, but you steady your breathing as Namjoon directs, squeezing his hand through each contraction. You recognize the doctor, Kim Seokjin, a tall man already dawned in a scrub hat, mouth mask and gloves, scurrying to where you are, "Alright, I am going to check your dilation Ms. [Y/N], just breathe in and out." Slamming your eyes shut, you whimper from the discomfort, "Alright, she is dilated three centimeters. Once you are at ten centimeters [Y/N], you will begin pushing. No worries, I will alert you as soon as I need you to begin. Keep breathing. Everything will be okay,"

"Taehyung... My mom... Dad-" you murmur deliriously between breaths, the foggy sense of your conscious outweighing how to speak properly.

"No worries baby, they're on their way. They're on their way right now," he sweetly kisses your perspired forehead, running his free hand through your tangled hair.

The three musketeers were official after the day at the basketball hoop, eventually learning of Namjoon's atheism as well as him providing for his family.

"My dad couldn't find a job that pays enough, so I promised him that I will do whatever it takes," it had been six months since Namjoon had been hired, and currently is finishing his final paint to the shed while you and Taehyung sit Indian style in the grass. "Thanks to the job here, I can afford the rent for my parents as well as give them my car since here, I just use the work truck..." Namjoon sharing more in-depth with his life story- you finally get what you've been determined to gain since meeting him.

It's weeks later that you'll never forget, leaning against a mini, red monkey bar after sharing your feelings toward the man you've grown so fond of. There's no denying the feelings he's had for you, and once he inches closer, the crave to hold his hand has never been stronger. Boldly, your fingers trail to intertwine with his, your nerves close to getting the best of you despite the persistent smile that hasn't left him. When you find the bravery to look up at him, he swallows calmly before leaning in, you stand on your tiptoes to meet halfway until your lips touch. The slide of his arms encompassing your frame feels so inviting when he presses his body to yours. The world is put on pause to you and nothing else matters other than the way his lips move so elegantly- your arms wrapping around his shoulders while he sways you from side to side.

Time doesn't seem to speed up through all this pain, but the adrenaline swimming in your veins peaks when Dr. Seokjin prepares to check your dilation again. "Ten centimeters-" He confirms, "Alright, [Y/N], the baby's coming. When I say push, you push. Okay," he positions himself though you can't see anything past your gown and raised knees, "One, two, three! Push!"

"AGH!" You grunt, a small scream vibrating at the back of your throat once you push with every fiber of strength, you can muster.

"Breathe, breathe," Namjoon's hand hasn't once left yours- sweat pouring from your scalp while the burning agony overpowers your body.

"Is she here!?" The click of darting heels enters the room and are loud enough for it to catch your attention. "Oh, honey, I'm here!" It's your mother- scampering to your side with the undeniable blur of Taehyung's red hair following suit. You want to ask where your father is, but before a chance is given, the doctor shouts, "Push!"

"AAAAAAAGH!" You manage, body straining in all its entireness. Taehyung jolts to let you squeeze his hand along with Namjoon's. His features show nothing but fear at the sight of you being in so much strife, yet he holds it together enough to cheer you on.

"I'm- I'm so glad you both are here," you cry- another sixty seconds drifting before the shout of, "Push!" erupts.

"I'm scared," you murmur in the dimness of the room. On your knees, Namjoon's soothing hands glide along the tops of your thighs motivating you to run your hands along his forearms. You don't know where your parents are, and you're too angry to care. You're bushed of the fighting so, you sought comfort in being here, with Namjoon. Taehyung dropped you off at the fellowship hall with the promise of not breathing a word- because if your parents were to find out remotely of your whereabouts, you'd hate to discover what the consequences will be.

"Me too," his nervous eyes investigate every inch of your face. You've never been with anyone this way before- secretly hidden away from the world outside trying to suppress the revealing crave of what you're curious about. Scooting forward, you drape either leg around him, propping yourself enough to where your arms lace around his neck.

His breath hitches from the gesture- your lips erotically aligning with his in slow movements, heat rising below you when you feel the hardening of his being beneath your sense, "I want you," you whisper. He knows that you're a virgin, and with care, he lays you on the bed, hovering above your frame where your bodies align perfectly. "Are you sure this is what you want," concern consumes his countenance, but you desperately bring your hands to cup his cheeks.

"I don't think I've wanted anyone so much in my life,"

You gasp into his kiss where he slips his tongue along yours- the sensation one you've grown used to from the slovenly kisses leading up to this very night. You give Namjoon permission to sneak his large hands underneath your shirt, trailing up your ribcage before swallowing your breasts whole in his heated palms. Nipples so sensitive, your heat drenches the moment he realizes the effect it has on you just by merely brushing the rising buds, lipping at your neck while he basks in the beauty of your moans. "More," you beg, "Please, Joon, more." When clothes start to be thrown off, you're determined to pleasure him, but have not an idea on how to do so. "Show me," you breathlessly demand, Namjoon's palm leading yours to encircle his twitching being. You stroke his erection as shown, biting your lower lip from the throbbing feeling of your core- him instantly finding your entrance to fill it with his fingers as carefully as he can- both of you pleasuring each other, yet still getting lost in kissing so deeply, the two of you forget to gasp for air. The sensation of heated pressed bare skin can be the most beautiful thing, especially with the way your legs entangle with his. You're surprised the feel of his prodding fingers didn't bring as much discomfort as you would have originally anticipated, but when he brings a hand to his penis, he rubs his tip along your slit letting the sloppy sound of you leak onto it. "Holy shit," he moans from how soaked you are for him- his fingertips finding your clit while yours dig into the backs of his shoulders.

Smoldering kisses move from your lips to your breasts, down your abdomen to your inner thighs where you tense underneath his touch that slides to hold your bottom half where he can scan your heat. The tip of his tongue swipes upon your slit excruciatingly slow to the point your fingers tangle with the material of the bedsheets. The smacking sound of his lips savor your taste while his tongue circles your core- you're hyperventilating from how deliciously he flicks his tongue upon your slit, screaming his name relentlessly- the speed of his skilled mouth driving you wild from the growing climax beckoning your stiffening thighs, "Oh, Namjoon, oh- Joon- I- Oh!"

He's not ready for you to finish because there's more he wants to show you. Hovering above you once again to see you coming down from your high, your heaving chest longs for his touch, and he nearly comes undone from the smile embellishing your face. His tracing fingertips parade along the outline of your body in featherlike tickles while the sounds of panting breaths mingle with shifting sheets bring subtle music to your ears for the rest of the night. The gentle parting of his lips grasps your own in smooth movements persuading arousal streaming from your core. Your fingers now link with frilly tufts of his hair, gripping the strands in reaction to the pressing of his bare chest to yours, dreaming of nothing more than to be entwined with him for what you hope will be forever. Hips grinding into yours prompts the light moan teasing his ears for more before his mouth trails to pause above your pounding heart. His hair brushing your chin, your arms glide to wrap around him holding the hope that he will never let you go. Not even for a second.

"Alright, one more! Almost done! Push!"

Sucking in one long breath, with a compulsory scream, you push with all you have left in you. Exhaustion weakens your limbs, yet a rush of relief floods your body when the cries of an infant reverberate within the room. With heavy eyes, you turn to see your mother with tears cascading down her face and onto the back of her hand covering her agape mouth- eyes remaining locked in front of her. Taehyung's gaze doesn't drop though his fingers loosen from yours at the small bundle immediately apprehending the eyes of every individual. Right then, you move your head to your other side where Namjoon gradually rises in awe- his hand still has yours. Gathering any ounce of strength, you're ready to see the child you've been waiting to hold for nine months, so cautiously you sit up until your stare meets Dr. Seokjin's. You can see the smile in his eyes despite the mouth mask, and what he says next brings you to tears, "It's a girl,"

"Oh!" You thrill, anxious to meet her while the nurses scurry to clean her up.

"Sir, would you like to do the honors?" The doctor gestures a pair of scissors towards a stiffened Namjoon whose eyes are welled with hushed tears. He can't even speak, yet he nods from the happiness exploding beneath his chest.

"Wait," Your mom says, "Is- is?"

It's a moment that seems to fit the setting for your father walks in, as if on cue, shoulders slumped from the anticipating tension now darkening the room. Taehyung's shoulders tensed at the sight of the man he despises, but for the sake of you, Namjoon and his Godchild, he keeps his composure enough to ignore the elephant now standing in the room. The fear that used to consume you upon your dad unraveling the truth about your secret vacates you when you know that you and the two men present can conquer anything.

"Yes," the answer is to your mother, but your stern glower of warning is only connected with your dad's although your mother's stare remains on you, "Namjoon is the father."

Namjoon stands with pride while he accepts the pair of scissors from Dr. Seokjin- your father, with a shocked expression, watches as the man he hired happens to be the same man who stole his daughter's heart without his knowledge. Yet, he refrains from anger, because who is he to ruin such a precious moment about to unfold here?

Pictures are taken of Namjoon cutting the umbilical cord, his fingers gently rubbing his daughter's cheek while he wipes at the tears dripping from his eyes. Jungkook takes her into his arms to weigh her before wrapping her in a plush pink blanket, "She is seven pounds and five ounces,"

Endless joy envelops your heart from the scene playing out before you; especially, when the vision of your father's quivering chin, admiring his granddaughter leaves you speechless along with the hope of redemption entering your beating heart.

"Are you ready to hold her?" Monnie's kind eyes match her smile when she touches your arm.

"Yes," you stifle a sob, "I want to hold her,"

Monnie poses her arms to where Jungkook places your daughter, Monnie guardedly turns to rest your baby into your arms. Her small face chortles, her eyes closing while she puckers her tiny lips. "She's so perfect," you cry, love in all its beauty falling from your eyes while you watch your daughter's fingers fold individually upon her chest.

"Just like you," Namjoon whispers, locking eyes with you before inching forward to give you a loving kiss.

"I love you, Joon," you whisper, pressing your lips to the corner of his mouth.

"I love you, too."

"Uh," the deep serenade of your best friend interrupts, all attention abruptly turning to see him raise an index finger in the air, "So, as the Godfather, I must ask a very serious question," the room chuckles along with him as they patiently wait for his request, "What's her name?"

"Ah," you nod, realizing that hasn't been made known to anyone other than to yourself. Your mother steps forward to place her hand upon your shoulder while your father keeps his distance enough to not cause any trouble- though the two of you share a small smile to let him know all is well. Namjoon watches you in admiration- the woman of his dreams holding his child in her arms while facing her deepest fear yet holds her head with pride about the man she will spend the rest of her life with along with her daughter swaddled to her chest. You are everything he's ever longed for and more, and he's ready to defeat any storm in life if it's with you and his daughter.

To answer Tae's question though, you return to face him, tears gathering in exhilarating bliss.

"Taejun." Her eyes slightly open at the hearing of her name as a tiny smile adorns her lips,

"Her name is Kim Taejun."

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[uglypastels]

To the Beat // drummer!Tom 1/2

(a/n) here it is!!! it took about a decade of my life but i think it was worth it  also shoutout to @duskholland​ for hearing out my ideas when i was brainstorming and together with @captainpeggy40​  for getting me through my breakdowns while writing. i got it finished!! <3 I really went all out with this fic, so i hope you guys enjoy it!! part 2 will come... sometime this week ;)

word count: 7939 (unnecessary content GALORE) 

warning: drinking, swearing, crowded spaces, part 2 contains smut 

you can find the band’s setlist here

not all songs are mentioned in the fic but it’s songs that i would really love to see them play haha. if anyone would be interested, i can make a seperate post on how i imagine them playing it (who sings and stuff idk)

Read part 2 here <---> extra headcanons here

With the right stranger, one night can feel like a lifetime.

“Will you please come?” your friend begged you over the phone. “It’s gonna be really fun!” 

“You know, you say that a lot, yet I never have as much fun as you promise.” You sat down on your bed, looking out the window as the rain hit every surface outside. It was not exactly the weather you felt like going out in. 

“Then that’s on your extremely high expectations, not on me.” She stated, “But pleeease.” She kept on whining, and you knew she wouldn’t stop until you gave in. It always went like this. Always. 

“Ugh, fine.” you fell back on the soft mattress, your head only missing the pillow by an inch. “Where is it actually?” There was the question you both dreaded. You, because you knew you wouldn’t like the answer. Her, because she knew you wouldn’t either. 

“It’s at Suki’s,” she mumbled, but you could still hear her just fine. 

“That’s where you work right- please don’t tell me you’re working tonight?!” you groaned into the phone. 

“I am, but I’ll be done around 9.30 I think, so there’s still plenty of time for us to hang out! Besides, you already said yes, and NO TAKE BACKSIES!” she said this all extremely fast and screamed the last two words into your ear. Then, on top of that, hung up as soon as she finished, not giving you even a second to fight back. Not sure what happened, you stared at the black screen of your phone in confusion. 

She said the concert started at nine o’clock. Did she really expect you to go to this thing and spend half an hour by yourself? Or did she want you to sit at the bar while she poured drinks for everyone? Either way, none of those options felt appealing. For a solid minute, you contemplated just not going, just… not showing up. Turning off your phone and watching a movie or something at home. 

But at the same time, you hadn’t left the house for a long time. And it was Friday night. Why not go out and see some obscure little band. What was their name again? Your friend had mentioned it, but you already forgot. Maybe it was for the better too. That way, you couldn’t look them up beforehand, and if they were shit, you would just find out there and not have another thing to be dreading as you got ready. Or maybe they would be good. Then it would be a pleasant surprise on the spot. 

You checked the time. 7:27pm. That gave you about an hour to get ready and then some time to actually get to the bar. Should be doable. 

So, you hopped in the shower to get all fresh again. Even if it would all get ruined later on in the night by standing in a sweaty crowd. It’s the effort to look presentable that counts. Then, you picked out an outfit that would be comfortable in the before mentioned crowd. You could never go wrong with the simple jeans and a t-shirt combo. 

Looking in the mirror, the thought of Not Going popped up in your mind again. There was nothing really obliging you to go. And the idea of standing there listening to the loud music, whether it was good or not, sounded slightly exhausting. 

No, you reminded yourself, it would do you good to leave the house once in a while. Have “fun”. You checked the time once more, 8:14. You had done everything a bit quicker than you expected. The Uber you had arranged for yourself would be there in a few minutes. So, you were stuck in that kind of waiting limbo, sitting on your couch, not sure what to do. Eventually, you put on your shoes and got your keys and were ready to head out. 

The drive was quick and thankfully, mostly quiet. It was only a minute or two before you reached your destination that the driver decided to ask you where you were headed. 

“Concert,” you said hesitantly. Why did these people always want to know your business? Thankfully, the man didn’t ask much more. And then it was time for you to get out of the car. The drive actually took much less time than you had expected and there was still some time left before the band would start to perform. 

Suki’s was a bar downtown, in the basement of some kind of law firm. Their whole thing was that they let new bands and artists play each week so they could get some of the public’s interest going. Make themselves known to the world. It was literally and figuratively, an underground following that it had. Many, but at the same time, nobody knew about it. It was a secret amongst music lovers. Considering the bar wanted to stay its own secret, you never understood the bright neon lights above the entrance, going down the staircase all the way to the actual hall. 

The bar itself wasn’t too big. Enough space for a small stage along one wall, a bar on the opposite side, and the rest was space for the crowd to either enjoy or hate the music being played. When you walked in the room was still relatively empty. You saw two guys setting up equipment on stage, you assumed it was the band. Behind them was a black banner with “Winter Solstice” written in scratchy white letters. Between the words, a star that was drawn on in precisely the same rough manner. You had to admit, it was a cool name. 

Considering there weren’t many people there yet, you headed for the bar to get yourself a drink before it would be too crowded to even reach the counter. And there stood your friend, behind the bar talking to some guy. They were both laughing at something as you walked up. 

“y/n! You came!” you squealed out, “what can I get ya?” 

“A beer?” you said it more like a question. 

“Coming right up.” And with that, your friend walked off to the tap to pour you your drink. It was more out of reflex when you sat down on the stool, you leaned your head on your hand, but you understood the question from the stranger when he spoke up. 

“Not looking forward to it?”

Still with your chin on your knuckles, you turned to face him. 

“Huh? Oh no, I mean… she kind of made me come here, but-” you tried not to sound too pessimistic, but the guy saw right through you.

“So, I guess the answer is yes.” He chuckled. Right then, your friend came holding your drink and put it in front of you. 

“I’ll put it on your tap.” She was going to join the conversation but right then a group of tonight’s spectators walked up in need of drinks, so she was soon off again. 

“I’m not not looking forward to it?” nothing in your voice made it sound like you were sure of yourself, but it was enough for him. You took a sip of your beer, which you could feel helping the situation. While doing that you looked over the brim of the tall glass to look at your conversation partner. Like you, he was drinking a beer himself and considering it was almost empty, he had done that either very fast, or he had been there for a while already. 

Next, you took a look at him. From the profile, he looked pretty good. He was wearing a loose tank, showing off his arms. His dark curly hair was held back with a black cap that he wore backwards. What definitely stood out to you was his jawline. It looked like you could cut yourself on it just with the slightest of touches. For everyone’s sake, you quickly turned your gaze over to the extensive liquor collection in front of you. But you could see in the reflection behind the bottles how he was smiling to himself. He definitely saw you stare. This was awkward, and you only got here two minutes ago.

“So, do you know the band?” you asked in the hopes to weed out this weird situation you had created. For some reason, your question made him smile. In that type of way as if you had just mentioned an inside joke. Except you weren’t in on it, so you couldn’t laugh along. 

“Yeah, they’re alright.” He shrugged. Then, as if he suddenly remembered something, he shot up straight in his seat. “I’m Tom, by the way.” 

“y/n.” Then you remembered how your friend practically screamed out your name when you walked in, “but you already knew that.” Your phone vibrated with a text, so you took it out and immediately saw the time, it was already past nine. You looked over at the stage where the two guys were trying to untangle some chords. Clearly, it wasn’t starting anytime soon. 

“What kind of music do they play?” You asked Tom while still looking at the band trying to get ready. 

“A bit of everything, I suppose.” 

You bit your cheek not to say anything that might come off rude, but he could still read you. 

“I guess that wasn’t the right answer?” He raised an eyebrow. 

“I just hoped to get something more specific, but as long as they’re good, I’ll enjoy it.” You took another sip of your beer as an excuse to shut up. He must think you’re such a bitch at this point. You saw him glance over your shoulder at the stage and then smile at you. 

“I like you.” there was that chuckle of his again, “I’ll see you later, then.” And he got up. You were gonna ask why later? Why couldn’t you hang out now? You didn’t like to admit it, but you enjoyed his company, even though it was only brief and most of the time you spent it making yourself look like a moron. As superficial it made you sound, you simply enjoyed the presents of a good looking guy like him.

You were going to ask him, but he quickly disappeared into the crowd that started to form along the foot of the stage. More and more people were coming and joining in. The two guys from the band had finally untangled their chords and were placing their guitars over their shoulders, and plugged them into the amplifiers. That’s when you noticed that a spot was empty on the stage. The big drum set had no occupant yet. 

So, while everyone waited for the drummer to show up, you took this time to look at the other two band members, trying to decide which one was the cuter one. 

That turned out to be slightly more difficult of a task, you quickly realised. Though they were both very different, they were both also extremely good looking. There was the blonde, strumming a few simple chords on his guitar to warm up. Even in the dim light, you could see how perfectly chiselled his face was. He was wearing a slightly oversized button-up shirt with about half of the buttons open. The skinny jeans didn’t seem comfortable to you, but he made them work. The rings on his fingers reflected in the lights as he kept on strumming. 

The other had a bit more of a playful vibe around him. His curly mop of hair bounced with every move he made. You could hear his loud and contagious laugh all the way from the other side of the room without the need for a microphone. His outfit was something completely different compared to the blonde. It consisted of a baggy t-shirt (that you could read the band logo on), with ripped dungarees that were only attached on one side. He had rolled them up, showing off his bright converse. His bass guitar was currently hanging behind his back as he adjusted the mic stand one last time. There was something familiar about him, though you were sure had never seen him before. 

Then finally, a third person joined them. People cheered since it meant that they could finally start playing. You tried to get a good look at him before he hid behind the drum set. Hair was hiding beneath a cap, tank top… wait… was it-

You got up and walked through the audience. There weren’t that many people, so it was reasonably easy to get to the front. Or, almost at the front row, standing right in front of them felt a bit intimidating. Now you could see all three of them much better, and there was no denying it. Your new acquaintance Tom was the drummer. And when you looked over at the curly bassist again, you realised why he looked so familiar. It was not an identical resemblance, but there was enough that made you think they were related somehow. 

You watched Tom spin one of his drumsticks in his hand. He had the biggest smile on his face, then he caught your eye and winked. The cheeky bastard knew exactly what he was doing, you were sure of it. He was waiting for your surprised reaction, and you fell for it completely—hook, line and sinker. 

The curly one got up to his microphone. “Hey everybody, we’re Winter Solstice,” his voice was much deeper than you had expected. Especially, considering that he actually looked younger than the other two, you noticed. “We thought you’d appreciate some more known songs tonight, so join in whenever.” 

Alright, they were gonna do covers. That was not a wrong move at all. A lot of bands want to show off their own music, but most of the time that leaves the audience just swaying awkwardly because they don’t know the lyrics or what to expect. 

“Here’s one you all should know.” 

The blonde started playing his guitar, and it only took a second or two before everyone realised what song it was. Mr Brightside. It sounded a bit different, as their attempt to make the song their own, but the riff was unmistakably Mr Brightside. Everyone around you immediately cheered and started to dance along, waiting to sing the lyrics. You were too, of course, but all you could think about was Tom playing in the back. He looked so focused, but still didn’t let it sit in the way of enjoying the song. 

In the song, the drums probably only started a beat before the lyrics, so you missed out on the first few words, but quickly you were singing too. 

“But she’s touching his chest now, he takes off her dress now. Let me gooo,” the blonde guitarist sang. His voice wasn’t perfect, it was rough, some might have called it cursive, but in that right sort of way. It fit well with the rest of the band and how they played. In just a minute, they had gotten the entire room hyped up. Everyone was into it. Maybe it was because of the song choice, but you doubted it. A song like that can be tricky to sing to a new crowd. If you screwed it up, they’d hate you forever.  

That was definitely not the case here, they had the crowd in the palms of their hands. With each beat, you were pulled in…or, was that just you? 

The second verse started, and it was the bassist that began to sing: “I'm coming out of my cage, and I've been doing just fine-” There was no clear description of his voice. At least you couldn’t really pinpoint it. There was definitely that playfulness in it that he had been showing through everything he did. He couldn’t stay still, jumping in place, making his curls bump up and down as he went. 

“It was only a kiss” 

It was Tom that said the little interjection in the song. You had only looked his way at the end, while the other was already singing, but you felt as if he had been looking at you directly. No, he wasn’t. Why would he? You shook the thought off and continued enjoying the performance of the three men. You sang along just like everyone else. 

And then the song ended. It was almost unbelievable that it had only been one song that they played, but they moved on to the next quickly. 

The guitar faded out but came straight back, accompanied by a heavy bass line. Some people around you recognised the melody, but it took you a moment or two. Then it went quiet. The blonde leaned into his microphone, whispering the words. 

“I’m the invisible man,” guitar riff “I’m the invisible man,” guitar, “Incredible how you can- see right through me!” His voice got louder as Tom joined in with the drums. Then those few seconds of bass followed which actually sent shivers up your spine. To put it simply, you were a sucker for good bass and beat. But what was it about them that sounded so good? You couldn’t think of anything particular that would have set them apart from all the other artists you had seen perform in the club through the years… 

Still, seeing them have so much fun on stage, it was truly intoxicating, you wanted to join them. You couldn’t remember the last time you had seen someone jump around on that little stage while playing bass. You couldn’t wait to find out what their names were, but for now, “the curly bassist” didn’t take a second to stand still. The only time he stood in one spot was when he had to sing, and even then he moved around a lot. 

The others didn’t have that same luxury. Of course, Tom did not have a lot of options, sitting behind his drum set. Yet still, he managed to light up the stage with his bright smile and the passion he put into his drumming. Any time you looked at him, you didn’t want to look away- which was hard, considering that the other two were also a great joy to watch. 

The blonde, in his turn, stayed on his side of the stage, being somewhat stuck with his microphone since he had the most vocals. But he still had a great connection with the audience, you felt like. 

Before you knew it, the second song had also come to an end. Cheers and applause erupted in front of the band, with you contributing to it as well, of course. 

“Thank you, thank you,” the bassist took a little bow. Even though they weren’t playing any song, he still slapped one of the strings mindlessly. “Like I said, we’re Winter Solstice. My name’s Harry.” He introduced himself. Finally, you could call him something else than the curly bassist. Even though it was a very catchy nickname, you thought yourself. 

“Here on the guitar,” Harry pointed out, “Is my good friend Harrison.” Harrison waved to the crowd, receiving screams from the audience as if it was filled with banshees. 

“In the back,” Tom immediately started a soft drum roll, but Harry didn’t wait that long, “that’s Tom.” Tom reacted with a face that could only be described as “bruh”, making several people around you laugh. You wondered if it was rehearsed or if this was just how they were. Either way, it was cute. 

Harry talked some more about how they were excited to play tonight, but you were looking at Tom. You watched him grab a water bottle and drink half of it in almost one chug. When he pulled it away from his mouth, you saw that he caught you staring. Even though you were between dozens of people, even though the light that was shining in his face- he saw you. And he winked again. In the next moment, you had to think if the heat burning through your body was an effect of that little gesture or because of how warm it was in the room. For your own sake, you went with the second option. 

“Alright, here’s another song for you all,” it was a voice you hadn’t heard speak before. Harrison. “Here’s: You Oughta Know.” There was a mixed reaction from the audience, including you. Of course, you knew the Alanis Morisette song, but you had never heard it be played by men.  It was definitely an interesting choice for them to play, especially after the Killers and Queen. 

“I want you to know that I am happy for you,” it was Tom that started singing, as he drummed softly. You tried to control your thoughts as he kept on singing. Then the pre-chorus began, and you were shocked at how well they harmonised. 

“Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able to make it enough for you to be open wide.” It actually gave you chills. How were you so excited about listening to three strangers sing? 

At the chorus itself, everyone in the room went wild, singing along loudly. It was clear that the people were sold on this new version of the song. It was all fine. You were enjoying the show. It was actually fun. And then, Tom sang the next line- 

“It was a slap in the face. How quickly I was replaced. And are you thinking of me when you fuck her?” It sure was a slap in the face. You had to remind yourself that it was just the lyrics of the song. And he was just a guy on stage that you had only exchanged a few words with prior. Yet, you couldn’t focus on anything from that moment on. You could barely comprehend their version of “Are You Gonna Be My Girl”, not even really understanding that they were playing a different song. It was just a big blur. But maybe it was for the better, because could you really cope with Tom singing the titular phrase of the song in that husky way that he did... debatable. 

When you woke up from your daze, Tom had stood up to show the crowd the beat to clap to. You joined in before anyone noticed how far out of it you indeed were. Harrison finished the song off with a falsetto and then it was already time for the next song. 

This time you knew what to do. You wanted to record at least some part of the show. And when harry started a bass solo, you made sure to get at least a bit of it and continued filming from there, ready to post it on your Instagram later on. Harrison joined in with the guitar, and you actually had no idea what song they were playing. More people didn’t seem to recognise the song immediately, which visibly amused the musicians. They couldn’t hide their grins even behind the microphones. Once again, the harmonies… how did they sound so good? 

As the song continued, the more sure you were that you had heard it before, but it must have been very different from the original. No, actually… How did you not recognise Dua Lipa? It was not hard to forget about the original when you got to listen to this version. How had each song so far been this good, you still didn’t understand. You didn’t want it to end. 

But unfortunately, right after that, they took another break from singing. 

“Alright!” Harrison cheered (more squeals from his side of the audience followed. Apparently he had started to gain quite the following). “The next song is another classic, I like to think.” People whooed. “So we’d like some help from you guys if that’s okay.” The crowd seemed to be into it, so Tom followed with the instructions. 

“Okay, so we’re gonna start playing in a sec, and Harry will sing a little melody. Just copy that, and we’ll be on our way.” In the meantime, Harry had gone off stage to grab a bottle of water, so everyone had to wait for a second. This gave Tom the opportunity to freestyle on his drum set. It was a simple beat, but it progressed into a more complex set. He, however, did it effortlessly. 

Finally, Harry came back running, he threw bottles to the other two, which they both caught without a problem. Tom started to press the bass drum steadily, layering more on top of it. Then Harry joined with the bass, and ultimately, Harrison’s guitar finished it off. Harry leaned into the microphone. 

“Ooooo-ooo-oo-oo, ooooo-ooo-oo-oo, oooo-oo-oo,” he almost whistled, but not quite. He continued a few times, together with Tom and Harrison until everyone in the room was singing along. Then made that kind of gesture to show you had to stop. Harrison sang the verse. Anytime it was your turn, you’d just follow Harry. 

You had been to many concerts, but not many new bands had much luck in getting a full crowd to participate in the song. But by the way they played, everyone just wished they could be in the band, playing along with them. Even if it was just dangling the triangle. You, however, didn’t want that, necessarily. You assumed that it was the fact that you hadn’t been out of the house in so long, that now that you had the chance, everything felt hundred times more great. So a concert that was already amazing, suddenly felt like a euphoric, once in a lifetime, experience… though that might go a bit too far. And it for sure helped that all three band members were hot. Like, really really hot. 

Literally, too, the room was getting really warm at this point, and the guys were visibly hot also. It didn’t stop them from performing at 110% though. A few songs more passed by and Harry was still jumping around the stage. Harrison sang every note perfectly as he slew that guitar of his and Tom… 

You could barely look at Tom. Playing the drums as hectically (in the good sense) as he did, you thought he would be exhausted by now. But he still had that big perfect smile on his face. The sweat was dripping down his arms, but it just highlighted his biceps, making it very hard for you to concentrate on the music. And then, no matter what he was doing, he would find you in the crowd and smirk or wink, making you even more flustered than you were before. The first time, you thought he was doing it to someone else. But then it happened again, and again. And the beat of drums led your heart. You could feel it in your throat as it kept pumping with the loud music. 

It was during their little break which they used to goof around and play the intro of “Chelsea Dagger”, that you decided to go back to the bar. Your friend had said she wouldn’t leave you alone for the entirety of the concert, but you were already quite some songs in and there was still no sign of her. And you quickly realised why that was. Since the show had started, the entire room had filled up with people. You had never seen it be so crowded, in fact. And then the bar was packed with people asking for their drinks. 

Your friend was indeed there, with another bartender, doing her best to pour the drinks quickly. But more and more people got thirsty, so it was easy to assume you would have to spend the rest of the night alone as well.

By that time, the band started on the next song of their setlist, and you really thought they were playing one big joke on you. Or at least this Tom guy was. As he loudly sang Sex on Fire, by Kings of Leon, you decided to sit this one song out from the front row and stay back, near the bar. It actually did you well, because it was much less hot than upfront. You could just stay there for the rest of the show. They had been through around ten songs already, so they must be done soon, either way, you thought. 

And you were right. Ending with Come Together, the applause was bigger than through the entire night. The boys finished with extended solo’s of their respective instruments and a bow, and it was really over. Harry came up to the microphone one last time as the other two were already getting off stage. 

“Thank you! We are Winter Solstice! Buy our merch at the door! GOODNIGHT!” 

The idea of buying a t-shirt was pretty fun. And apparently, you weren’t the only one who thought that. Far from it, actually, The line at the little merch booth quickly exceeded the length of the small concert hall. You wondered if they even had enough things to sell. Would it even be worth it to stand in line? You just waited for the stream of new fans to cool down.

Eventually, it did. Slowly, but surely, the line got shorter. You also noticed that there were a few people that had the exact same idea as you had, so you joined the queue before the rest could. You didn’t even have to wait that long. Before you knew it, you were standing at the little table. There were piles of t-shirts and cd’s, and there were more boxes behind the table too. They really came prepared. Harrison had just been folding up an empty box when you walked up. 

“Hi. Can I get a (your size)” you asked, already pulling out your card to pay, “and a CD?” 

“Yeah, of course,” Harry grabbed a shirt for you with a smile. Tom had been talking to the girl that had been in line in front of you, but he quickly turned to look at you when he heard your voice. 

“y/n!” He finished the conversation with the other girl before moving over to join his bandmate. 

“Hey,” you wish it hadn’t been so, but a lot changed since the first time you spoke to him, let it only have been about an hour. There was something about him being in the band you just watched perform and buying his merch, that made you feel like a little school girl standing next to him. 

“I thought you had left.” He noticed you leave? Not the point. 

“No, I just went to the back. It was getting a bit hot for me upfront.” 

“Ah,” he nodded. “Did you enjoy the show then?” 

“Yes!” you said, a bit too loud, “You guys were great.” You looked at the CD that Harry had just handed you and smiled. “And I was wondering if you could maybe sign this for me?” Out of nowhere, Harrison appeared behind Tom, grabbing the CD from your hands and putting his signature right at the centre of the packaging. Just as quickly as he appeared, he went back to whatever he was doing before. But not without sending you a wink first. What was it with these guys and winking? Not that you really minded it. 

Harry took the slightly more polite approach, waiting for you to hand him the CD and he signed it above Harrison’s signature. Then he handed it over, together with the marker, to Tom. 

“So, we got ourselves a number one fan, huh?” 

“No, I’ll just wait ‘til you guys get famous so I can sell it on the internet and get rich.” That was probably not the response Tom had expected, which you immensely enjoyed. Next to him, Harry erupted in a fit of laughter. 

“Haz, did you hear that? She thinks we’ll be famous.” His laugh was even better close up. While Harry and Harrison kept on laughing, you used the moment to speak to Tom, one on one. 

“So why didn’t you tell me you were in the band?” you asked. 

“What does it matter,” he chuckled.

“You let me ask all those questions about the band, it’s fucking embarrassing, man.” you couldn’t help but laugh yourself. 

“Heh, sorry.” he took off his cap to rearrange his hair since some of it had fallen in his eyes through the night. You didn’t know what else to say, so the conversation died down. Then you remembered that there was still a bit of a line behind you of people that wanted to buy the merch as well. 

“Let me just pay for these, and I’ll be off.” 

“No, it’s fine, on the house,” Tom said. You looked at him with wide eyes. 

“Are you sure? It’s really no problem.” 

“Yeah, just promise me one thing.” 

“What?” You raised an eyebrow, not sure what to expect. You didn’t want to jump onto that wagon too quickly. 

“Will you stay? I’d really like to hang out.” 

You weren’t sure what to answer at first. You did want to stay and talk to him, but it was getting late, and you had been standing for a long time, and you were kinda gross from how warm it was during the concert… but Tom was really hot. And he asked so nicely. 

“Sure.” you gave in. “I’ll hang out with my friend at the bar and let ya get back to-” you pointed around the table to make your point across. He nodded and waved you goodbye as you walked away, clutching on to your newly bought merchandise.

Just like you thought, your friend was indeed still at the bar, cleaning up leftover glasses from the counter. She saw you walk over and you could tell she saw something different in you. 

“Look at you beaming, girl! What happened?” she put away the half-dried glass to listen to you. 

“Nothing?” you said casually. She saw right through you though, so you just decided to give up the little act. “Tom asked me to wait behind for him.” You bit your lip, expecting to get a lecture from her. But none of that happened. Instead, she squealed out in, what seemed like, excitement. 

“Ooh, Tom is such a great guy!” 

“You know him?” you asked, surprised. 

“Well, he was the one that got their band the gig here, so we talked here and there, mostly planning,” she explained. “And I mean, look at him.” she sighed and her eyes glazed over a bit when she looked in the direction of the merch table. Not sure what else to do, you followed her action and glanced over. Of course, right at that time, Tom decided to look in your direction as well. He smiled and waved lightly, making your cheeks heat up and quickly look away. Your friend, however, waved back enthusiastically. 

“So you think it’s safe for me-” what were you even gonna ask her? 

“Go have fun, I say. But if anything does happen, remember the codeword?” Her tone changed to a more serious one, which you appreciated. You had agreed ages ago on a codeword to use. In case a date turned for the worst, or generally if something felt off. 

“Broccoli, baby. I know.” 

“Broccoli.” She held up her hand for a high five, which you gladly accepted. 

You chatted for a little bit longer. Every few minutes tho, you’d be sure to glance over your shoulder to see if the merch line was getting any shorter. It didn’t seem like it. There was simply no end to it. You felt yourself getting frustrated. To the point that your friend actually pointed it out, snorting from holding in her laughter. 

“He has got you whipped, hasn’t he?” she bumped your shoulder playfully. All you did was roll your eyes. Which, actually, said everything she needed to know. He did, didn’t he? You always had a soft spot for musicians, dated a few. But comparing them to Tom now… it felt like a joke. There was something about this guy that made you want to know more about him. You wanted to see him play and sing again. You wanted- do a lot of things. But you had to get that out of your head. Let the night speak for itself, see where it leads you. If it would be his bedroom… that would be fine. Just fine. 

You knew you were crazy for thinking all of this, but a girl can dream, right? 

You looked across the room and were glad to see that there were only a few people left. Harry had already started packing everything up that would most likely not be sold that night. You watched the three of them make some small chat with the people walking by, but all your real focus was on Tom and his deep stare right at you. It made your heart beat faster. With his arms across his chest, the muscles seemed even more prominent. 

He was suddenly pulled back into the conversation, and it was as if he changed into a different person. All bubbly, none of that- what even was it that he looked at you? You decided to not think about it too much. One does not do well when dwelling about anything. 

Finally, the last person bought their shirt, and they were done. Hoping it didn’t make you look too desperate, you didn’t waste a second to walk over to them. Harrison and Tom were helping Harry pack up the rest of the things that were left on the table. 

“Hey,” you said awkwardly. Tom almost dropped the stack of shirts he was holding. Again, the attention fell to his arms. You had to force yourself to look up at his face, which didn’t help much either, but it made it easier to think thoughts that would not mean a one-way ticket to Hell. 

“Hi! I’m so glad you stayed,” he said after putting those shirts in the box. “I thought we could go grab something to eat. I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.” He spoke really fast, just showing how excited he was to talk to you again. To be honest, you weren’t necessarily hungry, but going out to eat with Tom didn’t sound too bad. 

“Don’t you have to pack up?” You pointed back to the stage that still counted all of their equipment. 

“No, we’re playing here tomorrow, again,” Harrison explained. 

“Oh, cool.” Was all you said. It was cool, you just didn’t know how to say anything without sounding dumb. 

“Well, shall we? There’s a diner on the way to my flat. It has the best burgers.” Tom exclaimed. You ignored the little mention of his apartment and focused on the burgers. He wasn’t suggesting for you to come over to his place. It was just a fact… right? 

“Lead the way,” you told him, but before you left, you turned to the other two members of Winter Solstice. “It was nice meeting you guys.” Everyone waved, and so on, and you were off to eat. 

It was almost midnight by the time you got there, but the diner Tom had mentioned did advertise as a 24/7. And it held up. When you walked in, you were practically hit in the face with the delicious smell of pie. You sat down in a booth next to the large window and very soon after a waitress walked up. 

“What can I get ya?” she asked, flipping her little notebook open.  

“I’ll have a cheeseburger and fries, thanks,” Tom asked. Then it was your turn. 

“Just large fries for me, thank you.” The waitress wrote it all down, then continued to ask if you wanted anything to drink. 

“Ooh, do you have milkshakes?��� The woman smiled and nodded. “So a chocolate milkshake then.” You ordered. 

“Make it two,” Tom added. Then the waitress went off, Tom leaned on the table toward you, with his hands in front of him. “So, just fries, huh?”

“I’m not super hungry, and I wasn’t going to steal your fries,” you explained, making Tom laugh and shake his head. 

“You’re interesting, you know that?” 

“I like to think so, yeah,” you answered straightforwardly. It was a pity you had not gotten your drinks yet, or you would have taken a very nonchalant sip. You leaned your chin on your hand, just like you did at the bar before the show. Except for this time, there was a smile hiking up the corners of your mouth. Tom mirrored your position. 

“So how did you guys come up with the name?” you had been wondering that ever since you saw that banner hanging on the stage. It was always interesting to find out the thinking process like. 

“You gotta ask Harry, he came up with it one day, and we just went along. He’s the more artistic one of the bunch.” Of course he is. Well, that didn’t answer anything then. But another question popped up in your mind.

“Are you guys related?” 

Tom smiled at that question. “Yeah, Harry is my younger brother. Harrison has been my best mate ever since I can remember. We’ve always been close and messing around. Then one day we decided to grab some old instruments from the attic and- sorry, I’m probably boring you, aren’t I?” He took off his cap again and ruffled his hair. You thought he would put it back on, but he left it on the table. There was pretty good lighting at Suki’s, but the colourful spotlights were no match to the bright LEDs of the diner. 

“I don’t see how you thought that was boring,” you assured him. You truly enjoyed his little story, talking about his friend and brother. You had doubted the choice of going out to eat so late at night with a stranger, but now the reason was apparent. He didn’t want to be strangers-he wanted to get to know you. And you wanted to get to know him.

The waitress came back with two large milkshakes, topped with whipped cream and syrup. She said that the food would be ready in a few more minutes and left you to continue your conversation. You nudged Tom on to go on where he stopped previously. 

 “So yeah,” he cleared his throat, “we played and thought, hey that doesn’t sound shit, and we practised for a few months and decided some time ago, why not try and play.”

“Was this your first gig?” you asked in disbelief. He shook his head, though. 

“We’ve performed a few times, but this was the first one that felt… real, you know. Maybe it was just me, but I felt this great connection with the crowd, and it felt great.” You nodded along with every word, without realising that you had been getting lost in his eyes. He had been looking into yours as he spoke about that connection, and it made you feel that maybe, just maybe, he meant you specifically. 

“y/n?” He eventually asked, waking you up. You almost spilt your milkshake from the abrupt movement you made as you tried to sit up.

“What? Sorry.” You held the glass until it didn’t shake. 

“I asked if you enjoyed it? The show?” 

“Didn’t you ask that already?” Stupid way to answer! “But yeah, I loved it. You were really great- I mean, all of you.” but especially you, you wanted to add on, but that felt like going too far. As you were trying to come up with a normal-sounding answer there, Tom sipped from his milkshake. Something in his eyes told you that he could tell what you wanted to say, and that thought scared you a little bit. All you wanted to do was to give this hot guy a good impression of yourself, was that really that hard? 

But he didn’t say anything about it. Just continued the conversation as you hoped he would.

“Well, I’m glad. Honestly, you had scared me a bit back then, when you left,” he admitted. And there were the heart palpitations again, beating faster and faster. You grabbed the cold milkshake because you could feel yourself getting hotter. 

“How so?” you choked out. 

“Just because I could tell you weren’t exactly looking forward to the show, and then I saw you leave and didn’t come back. I thought you didn’t like us.” Us. He said “us”. Then we did it feel like he just wanted to say “me”? 

“I wanted to check up on my friend, and then I realised that it was much colder in the back, so I stayed there.” you explained again, “But why be worried about me, there were plenty of other people enjoying themselves.” 

He was about to answer when the waitress walked up with two large plates. She put them on the table with a smile, which you noticed was more directed towards Tom than you. He responded with a tight smile himself, but only shortly, turning back to you quickly to respond to your question. 

“No one there was as cute as you.” 

“What?” This time you made sure not to make any sudden movements to save your food and drink on the table. Did he really say that? But he didn’t clarify himself, he just smirked, enjoying your flushed expression a little too much. He put a fry in his mouth and still ate it with that smug smirk. You just went and ate some of your own fries, avoiding eye contact with him. You just needed a second to sort your thoughts. 

That second lasted a little longer, but at least you had the food to use as an excuse to avoid “awkward silence”. 

“So do you play any instruments?” he asked. You looked up to see that he had almost finished his burger. When you saw the dish being brought up, you thanked yourself and any god watching out there that you didn’t choose to order one. It was absolutely massive, meaning you would make a complete mess out of yourself—a sight for no one to see but your tv screen on a lonely night. 

“Uh, I can play a few notes on the piano but all very beginner's level.” You dipped a fry in your milkshake. 

“Like what?” He seemed genuinely interested. 

“Uhm.. the Flintstones theme song, for one. There was more, but I haven’t played in ages, so I doubt I remember anything.” 

“Flintstones, huh, nice.” He took the last bite of his burger. Knowing how weird it is to look at someone when they’re eating, you looked out the window for a second. It was dark outside, and the rain had come back, letting all the street lights reflect in the asphalt. 

You both finished the remains of your fries and milkshakes while making some more small talk. You got up simultaneously from the booth. Was it over now? You hoped not. You didn’t want to say goodbye. 

You grabbed your things while Tom paid for the food. Then you realised he had left his cap on the table so grabbed it too. But your hands were already full, so you decided to just put it on. Backwards, just like he had been wearing it through the evening.

“It looks good on you,” he commented when you met at the door. 

“Thanks,” there was the heat up your cheeks again. “And thank you for everything else, I had a really great night.” you were about to take the hat off to give it back, but he stopped you.

“It doesn’t have to end here, darling.”

To be continued...

> Thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoyed

> please leave a comment or ask with your thoughts. i love reading them and let me know if you want to be tagged in part 2! 

>masterlist and link to taglist in bio 

tagging: 

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#tom holland #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland imagine #tom holland au #band!au #drummer!tom holland #smut #tom holland smut #strangers to lovers #au

[ejlovespie]

Knocking On Heaven’s Door

Fandom: Supernatural

Author: EJ (@ejlovespie)

Summary: A car accident leaves the reader in a life or death situation...This was a reader’s request that was inspired by the classic song, “Knocking on Heaven’s Door” 

Pairing:  Dean x reader

Word Count: 2232

Warnings: Angst/Cursing/Near Death Experience/Somewhat Graphic Descriptions of Blood/Fluff 

Reader’s Request: Dean, Sam and the reader get into an accident while driving the impala. Dean and Sam get mildly injured but when dean turns around he finds the reader severely injured since the impact was from her side in the backseat and there is a huge chunk of glass stuck in her side and there is a lot of blood also she's pinned by the door so he has trouble getting her out. I would looove to see a little bit of dean pov. And can u pleaaase make it detailed as much as u can.

A/N: Thank you for the request anon; I hope you like it! This one was really long in the beginning events so I hope the ending doesn’t feel too rushed. Also, I apologize if any of the medical details are incorrect. Any feedback is greatly appreciated and any mistakes are mine. Thank you for reading! :) 

You sat in the passenger seat of the Impala, a rare occurrence since you usually got booted to the back. Sam was stretched out and snoring softly in the backseat as Dean drove, focusing on the road ahead. It was raining and you stared out the side window, counting the raindrops as they slid across the glass, out of view. An old rock ballad, something slow and sad played quietly over the speakers. Your eyes drooped as the music combined with the pitter patter of rain was soothing you into sleep. 

Mama put my guns in the ground

I can't shoot them anymore

You let your eyes close and smiled to yourself when you heard Dean, quietly singing along to the song. His low voice was deep and masculine and you were surprised by the amount of control he held when singing the words. 

That cold black cloud is comin' around

And I feel I'm knockin' on heaven's door

Knock-knock-knockin' on heaven's door

Knock-knock-knockin' on heaven's door

Drifting to sleep, you thought about how you wished you could hear Dean sing more often.  

Knock-knock-knockin' on heaven's door

Knock-knock-knockin' on heaven's door

-

You were shocked awake in your seat when a blaring horn sounded. It was so loud. Whipping your head to the right, bright lights blinded your vision and you screamed as the impala was hit by a large truck and forced off the road. Everything happened so fast. One moment all you could hear was the deafening sounds of glass shattering, tires squealing, and metal tearing then, everything was silent but the sound of rain.

Dazed and disoriented, you felt blood dripping from your forehead down your cheeks. Your hand went to the cut above your brow and you wiped at it, trying to keep blood from dripping into your eyes. You gasped as the movement caused a sharp pain in your side. Looking down your body, you were horrified to find a large shard of glass was lodged in the right side of your abdomen. Although it was dark, you could see your white shirt and jeans were stained in blood and littered with shards of glass. Trying to remain calm and keep your breathing normal, you called out to Sam and Dean. When neither responded, panic gripped your heart and you twisted your neck to find them in the dark. To your left, Dean looked okay at first glance but he was still knocked out cold. You tried to twist further to see Sam but cried out loudly when a piercing pain kept you from moving in your seat. Looking back down, you noticed more blood oozing out of your wound. Keeping your upper body still, you only turned your head as you reached out with your left hand to feel for Dean. He didn’t stir when you squeezed his bicep or his shoulder. 

Becoming more panicked and a bit frustrated, you felt Dean’s face and lightly patted his cheek trying to wake him. You sighed in relief when you felt his head turn towards and you heard his slurred murmuring. Afraid he would lose consciousness again you yelled, “Dean wake up!” Your eyes had adjusted to the dark and you saw Dean’s eyes fly open and fill with panic as he realized what had happened. He whipped around and reached out for Sam who, thankfully, grunted when Dean shook him. Finally, you breathed a sigh of relief knowing the boys were safe but cried out again when the action moved the glass impaling you. Dean whipped back around to face you, to ask what was wrong, when he saw the problem. His face went completely white and his eyes grew wide with fear as he stared at you. You could hear the squeaking of leather as Sam slowly sat up in the back seat. In an alarmed voice, Dean asked, “What’s wrong Y/N?” 

“There’s a piece of glass stuck in my side. You can’t see it because it’s on my right...It hurts to move Dean.” Your voice had started off controlled but it broke at the end. You were scared.

Dean gulped and gritted his teeth before his hands came up to cup your face. They were a little cold but you closed your eyes and leaned into his touch. In a gentle but firm voice he said, “You’re going to be okay sweetheart. Just sit tight.” You kept your eyes closed for a moment, not wanting him to see your fear. In the back, Sam cursed as both Winchesters threw their doors open. You heard Dean yelling at Sam to get a flashlight as you looked back to your right. Dean’s face appeared at the window. He had a flashlight in his hand and was moving the beam around as he assessed the situation. Pulling on the door handle a few times did nothing and he cursed before looking at you again.

“Your door got the worst damage Y/N.” He looked slightly to his right before continuing. “It looks like this pickup hit your door before jackknifing to the side. The passenger door is bent to hell. I don’t think I can open it without more tools.” Dean hollered at Sam to check the truck for tools before looking back at you. “It’s going to be fine. We’re gonna get you out of here.” Sam came to the window, shaking his head. The look in his eyes made you think the driver didn't make it and fear gripped you again. Oh God. you thought to yourself. Please don’t let me die like this. You closed your eyes as a tear slipped down your cheek. As Sam stepped away to call 911, Dean was there, reaching through the missing window. Being careful to not cut himself on the left over glass, he wiped your tear away before looking more closely at your wound. You looked down too and realized it had started to bleed more freely, turning your white shirt crimson. There was too much blood. As soon as you acknowledged this, you felt yourself getting light headed. 

Dean cursed violently before turning away from you to yell, “Sam, how long on the ambulance?!”  

Sam rushed over and said, “We’re in the middle of nowhere Dean. They said it could be 20 to 30 minutes.” Dean growled. “We can’t wait that long. She’s bleeding too much. Grab the first aid kit from the trunk and go check the pickup for anything useful.” He tried yanking on the door from the outside a few more times before he reached back through the window to try the inside handle. The door wouldn’t budge. “Okay. Y/N. Look at me sweetheart. I need to get you out but the door is stuck. I am going to pull you out through the driver’s side.” You whimpered, knowing the pain that was coming. You looked to your left as Dean crawled in through the other door. He carefully reached over to unbuckle your seatbelt before grabbing something from Sam. It was a bottle of whiskey and he was unscrewing the cap. Dean placed the neck of the bottle against your lips before tilting it for you to drink. You took a few pulls before he took it away and he screwed the cap back on. He praised you and placed a hand on your cheek before he leaned over you to look at your wound more closely with the flashlight. 

After a moment, Dean leaned back and said, “Okay Y/N. I can’t try to pull you out of the car with that thing in you. I am going to pull it out and you’re going to put pressure on it while I get you out alright?” You nodded and the motion made you lightheaded. You weren’t sure how much help you were going to be soon. Sam leaned into the car and said he was ready with the first aid kit. Dean pulled off his flannel and balled it up before giving it to you. “Use this to put as much pressure on your side as you can. Are you ready?” You weren’t but you whispered a “yes.” Faster than you could blink, Dean had pulled the glass from your side and threw it out the open window. You screamed at the pain and Dean yelled at you to put pressure on as he gently put his arms around you and pulled you from the car. Your head swam and your vision started to go black in the corners of your eyes as you were carried for a few seconds before Dean placed you on the wet ground. You noticed it had stopped raining as something was put behind your head before. 

Your heart was beating too fast and suddenly you felt so cold that your teeth started to shatter. Your brain registered the sound of Sam and Dean’s voices yelling but they sounded too far away. You couldn't make out the words but maybe you were hearing your name? You felt your body going into shock and tears silently ran down your face. You were going to die. You saw flashes of Dean’s fear filled eyes in your vision but you were having trouble focusing on them. Suddenly with perfect clarity, you remembered the lyrics to the song Dean was singing earlier. It was fitting for this moment and you found some peace as you remembered it.

That cold black cloud is comin' around

And I feel I'm knockin' on heaven's door

You certainly felt like you were knocking on heaven’s door and you accepted your fate as your eyes closed and everything went black. 

-

Dean’s POV

Dean panicked when all of the color drained from Y/N’s face and she started to shiver as her body went into shock. Icy fear turned Dean’s blood cold when her eyes closed and she didn’t respond to his touch or voice. Tears streamed down his face as he caressed her cheeks and begged her to hold on, to stay with him. Sam had grimly stitched the wound to stop the bleeding but what if they were too late? Leaning over, Dean placed his ear on Y/N’s heart and listened to the slow beat. It was too slow but it was there. In the distance, the faint wailing of the ambulance's siren could finally be made out. Dean moved his ear off of Y/N’s chest and brought his lips to her face. His hands reached up to brush a strand of hair out of her face as he kissed her softly. “Be strong baby. You have to hold on for me. I...I don’t know how to live without you.” 

When the ambulance finally pulled up, the medics loaded Y/N in before letting Dean climb up to ride along to the hospital. He held her hand when he was allowed to and stayed by her side until they reached the hospital and she was rushed to the ER. Hours passed sitting in the waiting room and Dean jumped when his phone rang. Sam had stayed behind to wait for the cops and a tow truck and called with an update. Dean heard the hesitation in his brother’s voice when Sam asked, “How is she doing?” With a deep sigh, he responded that she was still in surgery and he didn’t know anything yet. “I will call you when I hear more.”

It was several more hours before a tired looking doctor came out and asked for Y/N’s family. Dean launched out of his seat as the doc explained that her surgery went well. She explained that the glass shard had pierced some of Y/N’s organs, causing her to lose a lot of blood, but they had been able to fix the damage before it was too late. Relief washed over Dean as the doctor spoke and he asked if he could see her. Seeing the desperation in his eyes, the doctor hesitated before saying yes but that she needed to rest. “It may be awhile before she wakes up.” She warned. It was almost two full days before Y/N woke but Dean was there. He held her hand and kissed her fingers as she opened her beautiful eyes. His heart swelled and he tried not to cry when Y/N looked at him.  

“There she is. Hi sweetheart.”  When she smiled at him it felt like his heart would burst. Even in a hospital bed, she was beautiful. He brought her hand to his mouth again, kissing her until she giggled and said that his stubble was scratching her skin. They smiled at each other for a moment before Y/N started asking questions. What happened? Where’s Sam? Was he okay? When could they go home? Etcetera. She fussed over him, asking if he or Sam had been hurt and her worry for them when she was the one in the hospital bed made him feel...well it made him feel something he had never felt before. He didn’t know what he would he have done if he had lost this woman.  

They talked for a while and Dean filled her in before Y/N’s face became more serious. Looking up at him she said, “Thank you. You and Sam saved my life…” She paused, looking slightly embarrassed before she asked, “Do you mind singing to me? Your voice is...well it’s amazing and it relaxes me. I would love to hear it again but you don’t have to if you don’t want to.” The request took Dean aback but he was flattered and she could have asked him for anything in this moment and he would have moved mountains to make it happen. “Of course baby. Do you have any requests?” She contemplated for a moment, looking thoughtful before she answered him by saying, “How about a Guns N’ Roses song?” 

Dean Tags: 

@akshi8278 @wellfuckmyexistence @beabutterfly987

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