#i'm having extremely valid thoughts before bed as you can all see

[msommers]

things i Feel riya should canonically have but i Know she can't

heart shaped sunglasses, purple colored

roll on body glitter

hoop earrings

intricate nail art

thirst trap collection

phone but only to text booty calls and play music

crop top that says "small boobs, big spells"

#i'm having extremely valid thoughts before bed as you can all see #nobody could resist her charms w any of these #ch: valeriya de clairmont

[bcbdrums]

Given the fact that we were talking about our perceptions of certain kinds of ships in regards to Stein and how they suit or do not suit his character, how do you feel about smut/the relationship dynamics within Stein x character smut fics?

All righty then...! Here comes a very long rambling of my headcanons about Stein, his two primary relationships, and his relationship with those deeper intimacies. This takes some turns before it gets to the main point but well, I love talking about this man. Extremely long post under the cut.

Also - there are two blogs I tag at the very end of this post - you two feel free to ignore all my ramblings, just know I praise you both at the end and I still re-read your Soul Eater stories VERY regularly.

I'm truthfully still trying to reorganize my thoughts on this specific topic because 1) I have listened to many a headcanon from others on the subject and I always try to give validity to their thoughts even when they differ from mine, and 2) I've also read tons of smut fic with Stein out of sheer desperation for...well, Stein fic. (Come on Stein fandom where you at? Write me some gen fic too, lol)

I have not read too many fics of him with Marie cuz those always contain manga spoilers so I'm skipping those for now until I finish reading (exactly halfway through!). So what I've read is mostly Stein/Spirit smuts and just a couple with Marie, and I want to say….almost zero?? I think zero of those fics (and boy I've read plenty) have "hit the spot" in terms of what I would want for a Stein smut. They're good stories, in some cases great stories, well-written and thoughtfully conceived, but they're not fitting my headcanons and interpretations of who I see onscreen (and who I see in the manga so far).

All that said now… Some of my own relevant headcanons for him, and then I'll get more into fic of others.

I go back and forth toying with the idea that Stein experimented with intimacy just a little as a teen. He's not immune to puberty and hormones; he's human whether he likes it or not, which isn't to say mind over matter doesn't work for him. (Clearly it does, in staving off madness among other things.) But he's a scientist. He's curious. And I can see him justifying an experiment or two in his teen years. But they would in fact be just that, experiments. It's still a big maybe. I can't say for certain he would, it's the sort of thing like…if all the dots line up just right, he'd attempt it. If not, he wouldn't. And it would only be with those two people: Marie and/or Spirit. He doesn't trust anyone else enough. (Yes, I'm on board with the popular fanon that Marie was one of his other weapon partners after Spirit.)

Another teen headcanon... I can also easily see a sort of angsty distraction possibility for him. When he loses Spirit to Kami, I can see him getting into a "romantic" relationship with Marie as sheer distraction, and even misguided retaliation. Spirit "cheated" on him with another meister and abandoned him, so why shouldn't he do the same with another weapon? Which sucks for Marie but well she's not healthy about relationships any more than Stein or Spirit are. But this is just another sort of maybe-thought; another situation where all the dots would have to line up just right for him to go for it. But I can see it, no question, just like the prior thought.

As for Stein as an adult, at the point we see him in the show… While I think relationally he and Spirit have the most interesting dynamic to explore, the one he shows more openness toward is Marie. It's clear that he cares for her. And he doesn't fully understand that either. Now I don't think he wants to get into bed with her, or marry her, or anything traditional to a romance. But I also don't think Marie is going anywhere. Thinking post-anime now…. Unless he gives her a sign that there is nothing between them, I think she's staying put. But sadly for her, I think there is something between them... Sadly because, Stein doesn't know what it is, and it's not "love" the way that Marie wants it. It's just something he's unfamiliar with. Meanwhile she's devoted to him, poor woman.

Now, end of the anime… Let's talk about this…. Marie helps him back to sanity with her healing wavelength. But…then he's just "okay"? No he isn't. Look at that man. His dark circles are darker, his eyes are more haunted. That man has been living off madness and cigarettes for weeks. When is the last time he ate anything? Showered? Legitimately got any sleep?? How he's even standing up let alone fighting Medusa is beyond me, and then he performs freaking major surgery and then waltzes into the death room afterward like he's fine. Because...that's who Stein is.

Stein will fight until he is incapable of fighting anymore, to serve those he loves. Yes I said loves. And it is agonizing how much he strives to show his love for others, and it's something he doesn't even realize he has within him. He thinks he can't understand love? It's because he feels it so deeply and passionately it's beyond definition. Part of this however I'm also certain is motivated from his deep desire for purpose as an adult. The manga shows that aspect of his character even more-so than the anime (in what I've read so far). That man is desperate for purpose and to belong somewhere, with someone. He can't escape his human nature even if he doesn't understand it, can't define it, and even though it drives him crazy all on its own…

So bringing this back to Marie… End of the anime. I don't think Marie is leaving. She's gonna stay, help nurse Stein back to health and sanity despite his pretending he's fine (or perhaps even sheer ignorance of his condition), and Stein…is gonna be confused the whole dang time about his feelings for Marie. He knows he feels something but he has no idea what it is or how to process it. But "love" in the romantic sense he doesn't possibly consider, because well...his conceptions of that sort of thing aren't based in anything healthy (see: Spirit's relationships).

So yeah… She's not leaving. He won't reject her attentions because he does care about her, just not in a way he understands and also not in the way she wants. And as she starts to realize that he has some kind of feeling for her, I think she'd turn up the romance and she'd make a move on him. OR…she'd play the extremely...long...patient game, and wait for him to make a move on her, when it's within his comfort zone. And let me be clear… This man still does not know what love is in this traditional sense, does not understand love. He knows what physical attraction and hormones are and darn him he can't shake those either, but as an adult he wouldn't act impulsively on them nor would he confuse them with love. Stein is the ultimate master of mind over matter. If he were to sleep with her, it would be a choice; a decision he makes consciously and deliberately. I see this within the realms of possibility. But if he chooses it himself, if he's the one who makes that decision simply out of his wanting to…it would be a long, long time that that woman is waiting for him. But I do think it possible. The question is simply, how long will she wait. And she's also the type to try to stir things up (see: her behavior toward Joe in the manga). So who knows when they may end up in bed together... These dots are more complicated to align than those of his teenage years. And if Marie made the move first...I think he'd accept it. Because, see again, his wanting to belong with someone, and he knows he feels something different with Marie.

As for Spirit, well... Stein sees that Spirit likes women. And Stein sees that Spirit can't commit. I think Stein "loves" Spirit more than he loves Marie. First love, young love... Spirit is the relationship of his life, even though that's yet another thing he cannot possibly understand. I think that while part of him, the mad obsessive part, and the curious part, does want to be close to Spirit in the intimate way…it's not out of a healthy desire or even typical motivations. It would come from a desire to possess, from his deeply human but inexplicable yearning to be closer to the one he loves even though it's not the right type of love for that type of intimacy. Not really sure Spirit would be all-in if Stein were to make the move... I think Spirit would take persuading. It's another circumstance where all the dots have to line up just right, and in this case probably more while caught up in madness than in sanity. Because as previously mentioned… In his right mind, Stein knows that Spirit likes women and more importantly that Spirit cannot commit. And he's ironically smart enough to know not to attempt a traditional human romance with someone who cannot commit. I don't think Stein would himself attempt intimacy with Spirit in his right mind at all, unless something happened to make him utterly desperate not to lose the man... Another instance of, all those dots have to connect.

But ugh, the angst. Spirit abandoned him after five years... Stein is not going to willingly subject himself to possible heartbreak again. Plus, he does not think Spirit has forgiven him for the "experiments." I think he thinks Spirit only hangs around him now as an adult as his handler, despite desperately wanting his friendship again. But I think he figures it's a lost cause so he just takes what is offered and never pursues more.

Okay but before I digress further into my endless thoughts about Stein's and Spirit's relationship (I'll do another post for that maybe), back to the point of your question.

I am really not one for labels, partially because I don't understand them but also because I think the spectrum is just so deep and too much defies definition. But if I were to label him, I guess I'd go with...gray ace with demi leanings…?

The man is driven only by curiosity, about anything and everything. But the level of intimacy we're talking about is more than he ever wants to trust anyone with. It's always gotta be on his terms, and more often than not…his terms would be unhealthy.

So let's talk about what shows up in fanfic, since that was what the original question was about. And once again, I like to lend validity to everyone's interpretation. Just because it isn't mine doesn't mean it's wrong or shouldn't exist. But you did ask about MY thoughts, so that's what I'm sharing here.

Once again, I've barely touched Stein/Marie fic because I'm avoiding manga spoilers. In the one or two I've seen, he comes across as not connecting emotionally in the typical way, but knowing that there is indeed something different about being with her. He knows she cares about him, and he cares in return. But it doesn't come across as anything intimate on his side of it. This isn't a characterization I particularly like, because Stein as an adult... As I said, I think he'd choose that intimacy if and when he wants it. In the stories, it comes across more as him just doing her a favor, just going along. It doesn't sit right. But like I said, that's only two stories. For other Stein/Marie, I reserve opinion for later.

Stein/Spirit... Okay. I've noticed a great many commonalities in the fics I've read. And this isn't a taste or preference thing; like I said I have devoured almost every smut fic just in desperation for any fanfic of them. Would prefer more gen fic less smut personally, but anyway.

Most fics have Stein in the dominant role, Spirit in the submissive role. I understand that interpretation but it's not how I see them. I see them as equals if they were to get into that type of intimacy. There is often a lot of bloodplay, frequently madness on Stein's part, major instances of non-con, pet play, BDSM, sometimes light cannibalism... It all suggests an impersonal and unhealthy relationship most of the time, which again...is not at all how I see them if they were to become a couple. Could such things come about? Unhealthily, possibly. But darn me and my desire for happy endings.

These two men are so broken, that if they were to become a healthy couple...I feel like it would be slow, cautious...extremely hesitant. There is extreme distrust on both sides, and also misconceptions about how the other feels. Which...I will save that analysis for later. Focusing back on smut fic.

I have seen only a few that touch on the give and take in a trusting relationship (all by the same author) that come closest to what I feel is accurate to the characters onscreen as I see them, but still the emphasis is too much on lust. It still isn't hitting the spot for me due to a lack of that relational development... Make no mistake, the stories are great, but I personally am hoping for something much deeper.

In my view, Stein just does not seek out physical intimacy in that way. I don't think he can fully escape the innate human need for touch, but in terms of a drive to get into bed with anyone... I think the occasional human desire for it crops up, and he easily ignores it/packs it away because it's not useful to him. It doesn't bother him. He doesn't think about it.

So this is where that...gray-ace, demi vibe comes into play for my view of him. Talking about Stein here as an adult and in control of himself, not consumed by madness... This is I supposed a bit of a summation of my thoughts.

If he did get into a relationship with anyone (and again I think his only choices are Spirit and Marie), it would not be based on the physical at all. I also don't think he would rush into any relationship. It would be a long process before he trusted the person enough to consider them a romantic partner. And really, we could get away from the word romance entirely... Life-partner is a better word, in Stein's case. If the person wanted physical intimacies, I think he would be responsive to that. The other person would be in the lead, but in no way dominating. It would have to be an equal trust thing or else Stein would nope out hard. Stein would gradually learn what it is he likes physically, and how to give his partner what they want. He can come to enjoy it because this is his life-partner, the one he belongs with, the one who needs him and is part of his purpose. But again...the physical is not something that drives him at all. Not in how I see him portrayed onscreen or in the manga.

So, overall, in my point of view nearly all smut fics miss the mark. Now...the stories I've seen where I think the physical intimacy is nailed don't even get to smut. Those are the stories by @asymmetryestablished (AO3 NothingSoDivine) and their characterizations of Stein and Spirit defy description in any words I have. The other author who nails it is @wispforever (same on AO3) and the closest to physical intimacy they get is dancing, but my gosh still the characterizations are utter perfection. I will be re-reading y'all's Stein/Spirit stories forever.

I hope I did in fact answer your question, but overall, I was delighted to just spill out so many of my thoughts about Stein even if in summary form. Yes this was a summary... Okay. I'm done. Thanks.

#soul eater #franken stein #spirit albarn #marie mjolnir #stein #spirit #death scythe #crossstitch #steinspirit #spiritstein #steinmarie #stein x marie #stein x spirit #spirit x stein #headcanons #ask answer

[missmarj]

Nanami Kento x Reader, fluff, angst

Warnings: spoilers ahead

He should have known.

Today felt different. From the moment he opened his eyes this morning, he had this nagging feeling in the back of his mind that something is about to go wrong. He sits up and takes a deep breath, running his hands across his face, and carding his fingers through his messy bed hair.

He only relaxes when you rolled over to his side and pushed yourself up to wrap your arms around his bare torso. He grins when he feels your lips against his shoulder.

"Come back to bed, please?" You murmur sleepily. "'s still so early."

Nanami then turns to you, the soft smile on his lips stretching wider. "Alright, sweetheart. Only for just a couple of minutes, okay? I have to get ready and pick up Megumi and Takuma."

"Nooo-" You whined. "Can't you just please ask Ijichi-san to do that?"

He laughs quietly, as he lays back down with you. "I guess I could just ask him that-"

"Yes!!" You encouraged him. "In fact, just take the day off. Been a while since you have anyway. And I'm sure whatever's going on, Satoru can handle it on his own. He just likes calling you and pestering you because he has this weird crush on you. That's why he always wants you around."

Nanami's chest rumbles with his quiet laughter seeing you pout. You have always insisted that his senior sorcerer has a crush on him. Personally though, he thinks that the man just loves seeing the annoyed expression on his face. He knows Gojo means well, just always trying to get him to be more upbeat like him.

"Gojo-san just wants me to lighten up a bit. He thinks I'm too serious all the time." He reasons, closing his eyes as he settles back on bed with you in his arms.

"Although you know that's not the case, right?" He asks, cracking an eye open to look at you for validation. You merely grin, blushing at the thought of the playful Nanami you have come to know and love behind closed doors. He can be teasing and surprisingly annoying when he wants to be but damn, he's so charming about it that you always give him a pass.

If you're being honest, you feel immense pride that only you can see this side of him.

"Nah, I still think Satoru has a crush on you. The man practically cries when you refuse to join him for meals."

He laughs again which fades into a contented sigh, realizing that he often does smile or laugh when he's around you. The thought of taking you up for your suggestion sounds so good right now. Spending the whole day like this on this cool October day gets extremely tempting. Maybe later this afternoon, he can go to the bakery and buy a sandwich from the friendly lady you both like.

Should he just call and tell them he can't work today?

But then his phone starts vibrating on the bedside table. You both eye it for a second, and Nanami flashes you an apologetic gaze. He kisses the top of your head and mouths, "I'll be back before you know it."

Parting is always hard for you. You know his profession, you know him as a person. You know that he's good at what he does but he also would not think twice about protecting the kids under his supervision.

You knew this prior to getting into the relationship and it's one of the reasons why you have fallen for him. But it doesn't get any easier each time he has to leave for a mission. With a deep breath, you nuzzle his neck and kiss the base of his jaw.

"Promise me you'll take a leave soon?" You whisper. "Come take a vacation with me? Finally visit Malaysia like we always talked about?"

Nanami holds you tighter, a soft smile gracing his lips. "And then the Philippines. I've read there's a lot of beautiful beaches there that you're going to love."

You hum in agreement. "And then we can go to Indonesia. Then, Thailand, Sri Lanka-"

"Anywhere you want, sweetheart." He cuts you off with a peck on the lips. "I'll go anywhere with you once this is all over."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

---

He should have stayed home.

Nanami exhales shakily as he wipes the blood from his hands before wrapping his tie around his palm. He feels exhausted and his strength is slipping by each passing second. He looks up in a moment of reprieve, sensing a horde of mutated humans up ahead.

Yeah. He should have stayed with you.

---

You were preparing dinner when your phone suddenly rang. Your brow raises seeing your boyfriend's name pop up. He doesn't usually call when he's on a mission and this makes your breath catch. You snatched the phone from the countertop and answered right away.

"Kento? Are you okay?" The shrill in your voice made Nanami smile to himself.

"I'm fine, Y/n. Breathe." He says and you closed your eyes in relief.

"Sorry. I just thought something had happened-" you shake your head. "Hi, love."

"Hello, sweetheart." Nanami murmurs, wishing he could be at home with you right now. He'll bet you already had dinner started and you're heading to the couch to get back to reading your book while you wait for the food to be cooked.

"Listen, I don't think I'm going to make it tonight. So don't wait up for me, alright?" He says, as he continues forward looking around for Maki, Naobito and Megumi.

"Ohh. Are you guys having a rough time with the mission?" You ask, brows furrowing as you settle on the couch, cradling the phone in your hands.

"Yeah.." Nanami rakes his brain of what else he could say that wouldn't cause you to panic. The situation is really bad and there's no other way he could put it that wouldn't have you figuring out that he's in some deep trouble right now. So he opted with, "Remember our conversation this morning?"

You perk up in your seat, smiling to yourself and nodding as if he can see you. "Yes."

Nanami grins at how this instantly lightens up your mood. "Let's do it. I'll book our flights and make reservations. Let's go on my birthday?"

"I'd love that, Kento." You say, smiling ear to ear.

"Promise we'll go no matter what?" He asks and you let out a laugh. "I should be the one asking you that. I've been begging you to go for as long as I can remember!"

Nanami laughs too, nodding to himself. "Just promise me, will you?"

You roll your eyes. "Fine. I promise."

"Good." You can tell he was smiling and this inevitably made you smile too. "Alright, I have to go, sweetheart."

"Okay, love. Take care." You say. There was silence on the other line for a moment, you were about to check if he was still there but then he speaks again.

"I love you, Y/n.. Always." He murmurs lovingly and your heart swells.

"I love you too." You murmur back. But then, you start to feel a turmoil of worry brewing in your chest. "Kento? Wait." You swallow hard.

"Why do I feel like you're saying goodbye?"

You hear him chuckle on the other line. "Because I am, sweetheart." Nanami's expression turns blank as he reaches the station. "I have to go now. Remember your promise, okay?"

"O-okay. Kento-?"

"Goodbye, my Y/n. I'll see you soon."

---

"Y/n-san," Yuuji shakes you gently. "We're here."

You open your eyes as the van halts, dropping you off to the hotel. One of the staff welcomes you as you enter the lobby. "Right this way, Mrs. Nanami." You returned her friendly smile and followed her to check in. "We followed every directive from Mr. Kento. If anything isn't to your liking please let us know."

You were all assisted to the hotel room, yours were right next to the kids. You turned to them and reminded them, "Let's meet by the beach for dinner, okay?"

The bed looks so welcoming and you find yourself drifting the moment your body hits the mattress. After the nap, you showered, got dressed and made an effort to doll up a little. You went out to scour the place for a cake. Fortunately, you found one at Kampung.

You walk along the beach, carrying your sandals in one hand and the box of cake on the other.

You found the perfect spot as the sun starts to set. The skies now splashed with shades of orange and pink. You smile to yourself as you take out the cake.

Taking out the matchbox one of the staff of the restaurant has given you, you light up the candle. You start singing Happy Birthday, voice getting thick and tears flooding your eyes as you sing the last line of the song.

The candle goes out with the gentle breeze that passes by and you close your eyes, your hand drifting to your necklace where parts of him you're still able to keep resides.

From the pool area, Yuuji, Megumi, Maki, Yuta, and Inumaki spot you by the shore. Each one of them feeling the heaviness and loss you're feeling. They walk to where you are, taking their place beside you.

You smile up at Maki who sits at your left. She takes your hand in hers, squeezing reassuringly. You then turn on your right and see the rest of the kids looking at the horizon with pensive looks on their faces. They have all been through so much and you know they're all blaming themselves for what has happened to the love of your life.

It took a while for Yuuji to look you in the eye after what happened. But with your constant reassurance that you do not blame him or any of them, he finally came around and was able to grieve properly.

They say everything heals with time, but you found that to be false. Because it still hurts just as bad to this day, hurts worse with every passing day if you're being honest. Especially on days like this, when he's supposed to be here with you.

But then, this pain is a reminder that he was here, and that your love for him is still here too.

So you smile and look up to the skies, wishing he could at least still hear you as you say, "I kept my promise. Happy birthday, Kento."

#Happy Birthday Nanami!!! #nanami x y/n #nanami x you #nanami kento #jujutsu kaisen nanami #nanamin #jjk nanami #jjk fanfic #jjk imagines #jjk fluff #gojo #yuuji #maki #jujutsu kaisen #angst #jjk angst #nanami angst #tw: death

[ijwrsmff]

OMG HI HOW ARE YOUUU

I can request creepypastaslelczflemroeld

TIM WRIGHT/MASKY X SLEEPY!READER :DDD

Cuz i'm sleepy- but i'm a cry baby too..

SO

Tim wright/Masky x Sleepy!Crybaby! Reader :D

For the scenario/an idea idrk.. Mmh................ Can you do just Fluff/cute ? Like cute moment to spend time it'll be fun :) IF YOU DON'T WANT TO IT'S YOUR CHOICE !

Positivity :

You're Valid. Be proud of who you are and what you do. Have good moments to create good memories/souvenirs because you ARE your memories. Without them you are nothing, someone who don't remember anything is not really a person and they'll don't feel like it, they'll be like.. empty ! So create good memories ! Be happy of little things ! And if you're sad it's okay too !

You're so kind ;-; thank you for the positivity. I wasn't expecting it, but every time I would read my requests to write them I would come back to this ask and smile. So thank you so much, I hope you have an amazing day/night and you enjoy the fluff ^^

Word Count: 1,038

When will he come home? It was so late…he said he’d be back late, but you didn’t think it would be THIS late. It was already approaching one in the morning…

You were waiting for your boyfriend Tim (or Masky as he liked to be called) to come home. He said not to wait up for him…but you couldn’t help it. It was almost your job to worry about him. 

And after someone broke his phone he hadn’t been able to get a new one and call you to let you know what the plan was. 

So here you were, sitting on the couch not knowing what time he’d get back. 

Another hour passed and you were sleepy as ever. Your head kept bobbing, and you told yourself many times “I’ll just rest my eyes for a second.” But you always jolted back up at the thought of Masky being in trouble. 

Finally, you heard the door knob jiggle before the door opened. 

Feeling intense emotions, you ran up to him, jumping into his arms. 

He looked at you, confused, “Why are you still up? I said not to wait for me.” And he caught you effortlessly. He rubbed your back and carried you upstairs to your shared bedroom. 

Tears fell down your face and they soaked into his hoodie. 

“Woah! Why are you crying?” He said, concerned as he laid you on the bed. 

You sniffled and clung to him, and he laid down with you knowing you wanted the physical touch at this particular moment. “I was-I was just so worried about you!” 

He took off his mask and set it on the bedside table. Masky gave you a smile, and patted your head, “Don’t worry about me. I’m tougher than I look.” And he joked by grabbing his upper arms and flexing to show you his muscles. 

The tears didn’t stop, and you rested your head on his chest. It smelled. He had definitely got his victim’s blood on it, but you were too tired to care. 

“I…I love you so much…” You mumbled, falling asleep knowing he was home safe. 

You didn’t see it, but he smiled at you adoringly. “I love you too…” And he tried to get up, but even in your sleep you clung to him. “Come on, I gotta shower before I get blood all over the bed!” And he tried to get up once again. 

A sniffle came from you, but you slowly eased your grip on your boyfriend. 

Taking the opportunity when he had it, he got up and went towards the bathroom to shower. He looked back at you, and the same adoring look was on his face once more. Even in your sleep, you were the sweetest person in the world. You cared for him so much, and he knew it. 

You woke up soon after, and he was still in the shower. You could tell by the sound of the water, and you rubbed your eyes, still extremely tired. 

But…you wanted Masky. You knew he was safe, but you worried about the next time he got into a fight with a victim. And you often had nightmares about terrible things happening to him. You knew if you fell asleep with such unresolved feelings, those nightmares would happen again. 

Walking quietly to the bathroom, you discarded your clothes, Masky’s already laying haphazardly on the ground. 

You pulled the curtain back, and a shrill scream came from his mouth. A noise you never thought he would make. 

“Hun! You scared me half to death! What are you doing?” He managed to get out, still recovering from the scare he just experienced. 

“Wanna be with you…” You mumbled, and it took him a moment to process the words. 

That same adoring look he often gave you took over his face. “You just had to say so…” And he turned back around, looking towards the water. 

Without hesitating, you hugged him from behind. He relaxed into your touch, and you felt so much more at ease knowing he was here, with you, and safe. 

You yawned, and he let out a small chuckle. “You’re such a tired thing, aren’t you?” And he turned, now washing you with body wash. 

You started to cry, now out of relief that he was safe. He wouldn’t have known, being in the water and all, but a sob escaped and he panicked momentarily. 

Masky regained his composure, and rubbed your back, pulling you into a tight hug. “God…you’re such a crybaby you know that?” But his tone was anything but cruel. It was out of love, and admiration. 

To him, you crying so much was almost comforting. It showed you had strong emotions. Something he wasn’t used to before he met you. A lot of the people he is around due to his partaking in murder, were sociopaths or psychopaths. You…were refreshing. A kind soul if there ever was one. 

You yawned, and Masky finished washing you. “Come on, let’s get you to bed, little crybaby.” He said as he picked you up, turning off the water in the process. 

He sat you down on the toilet, and ran back to the bedroom quickly to get your pajamas. 

You nearly fell asleep there, but he came back and got you dressed, before putting on his own sleepwear. 

Once you were both dressed, he carried you to bed. “Come here.” And he laid you down with your head on his chest. It was comfortable, and you could feel yourself quickly falling asleep. 

Masky was quick to follow, and you both fell asleep in each other’s arms. Just how you liked it. 

Despite him calling you crybaby, some part of you knew he admired that trait. In his eyes, seeing you cry out of worry for him was both admirable and worrisome. He enjoyed that you cared enough about him to cry. But at the same time…he hated being the one to make you cry. 

After some time, he realized it wasn’t HIM necessarily. But situations he got himself in. Either way, he enjoyed you getting so excited when he returned. And he knew…

He’d do everything in his power to return to you, always. 

#masky x reader #x reader #gn reader #fluff #creepypasta x reader #masky x tired! crybaby! reader #mentions of murder but no details

[shir0ch4ns-art]

TW// MISCARRIAGE

I know that this isn't what I usually post or even have on this blog but like I feel like I'm gonna scream or break down if I just don't put this down on some form of like "physical" words.

This got really long and does kinda goes through the emotions felt so I suggest not clicking the read more if you're not in a good space to read this

As the trigger warning suggests, I just had a miscarriage. The same fucking day I did a pregnancy test. It was simultaneously the best and worst day of my life. I had started off kinda scared and nervous but it also just confirmed my suspicions for the past few weeks since I missed my period. I then just felt so happy, like I was on cloud 9 the whole morning. I went to work I called my mom I was on the phone until I had to officially open the store (I was on opening shift so I'm there half an hour early to prepare) I was just so happy. Then I noticed some spotting and then some more spotting and finally I caught the tiniest bit of red and I fucking left. I told my lead what was happening, and they were just shoving me out the door. I left work 2 hours early and then spent literally the whole day at the Urgent Care just to get a fucking "we don't know". I was a bit mad then but I have since realized that I had detected my pregnancy super early and most people don't even realize they're pregnant until way later on, I'm just super observant of my monthly because it's a bit irregular. And with that it would be extremely hard to tell what was happening. They put me on bed rest for 2 days and to go back the second day. I was bleeding so much between then that I just knew I had miscarried but I was deluding myself into thinking that I was wrong that maybe it was something else, something that can be fixed or maybe I was freaking out over nothing. Only to go in and do some blood work that I got the result back from before the UC doctor did and just...blue screened. I knew, I waited in that waiting room with my husband and mom for the confirmation but I knew. And just like that it was gone.

I'm devastated and angry because logically I know there's no reason, logically I know this just happens sometimes, logically I know it was nothing I did or didn't do...but emotionally I wanna know why, why did this happen, how did this happen so quickly, seriously what the fuck happened. I'm mad because I didn't even get a chance to see what kind of person it would have been, I didn't get a chance to see this potential person grow up, I didn't even get a chance to at least hold them. And I'm just gonna mention it right now that I am vehemently pro-choice and I don't want my use of referring to what wasn't even an embryo at the stage I lost my pregnancy as a potential person to be used for pro-life rhetoric. I don't make this threat casually or at all but I will fucking block and flag you if you do. I'm referring to it as a potential person because I actually wanted this pregnancy not because it was even a life at the point of miscarriage, if I hadn't done a pregnancy test I would have thought it was just a really late really bad period. But I did, and I knew, and that's what's making it so hard to fully come to terms with. It wasn't entirely planned but it was wanted and that hurts.

I'm doing better now, I have a really good support web of friends and family that have helped me through these past few days. My husband being the most supportive one and being my rock throughout this. I'm not even sure why I'm making this post but if anyone else in my position sees this and find some kind of comfort that they're not alone in this and that yes their feelings of despair and anger are valid and that just having someone else experience the same makes them feel less alone then I'll leave this up. I might delete this later or I might forget but if it helps then I'll purposely leave it up.

I nicknamed it capsicum since it made me crave spicy foods like no tomorrow.

#tw miscarriage #miscarriage #shiro blogs #im sorry for this very depressing post but i just have some very Big Feelings and they need out #if anybody needs the hotline for support i can edit in the number i found on the planned parenthood website #might delete later #i am doing better though i have already talked my feeling out and rationalized what happened but im just very tired #need a few days to recharge my social battery to face the public again without crying

[primeministerofantarctica]

There's a lot of trigger warnings so I'm not going to put the text here but directory commentary for the first scene of Ch. 4 of The Truth Can Run But Not Hide? Please?

Sure!

Shadow dreamed, like he always did, of falling.

Falling past red skies and concrete buildings. Falling through a black expanse, reaching up as the ARK got farther and farther away; pale blue and blonde and red still visible in the windows long after it shouldn't be. Falling, watching the stars and buildings and meteors and trees and clouds rush past and the ground grew closer and closer until-

^ this might be a bit of a spoiler, but Shadow falling is also a thing relevant to the third-movie storyline (which will be covered more in-depth later). also i wanted the list to be purposefully nonsequential - seeing stars then trees then clouds - to really highlight the otherworldly dreamlike state.

He looked around the room. It was early - his internal clock told him it was 4:37, before most working humans got out of bed. Time was a fickle concept in the ARK, where all lights were artificial, but Maria always complained if he tried to wake her up before eight AM.

"Oh, good. You're awake."

^ shadow being a Spaceship Baby is so fascinating to me. would he have an internal clock? what's his circadian rhythm like? much to ponder. also, first clue that This Maria is an externalization of Shadow's own psyche and not an actual ghost (which is. very important to differentiate), this one's not complaining about getting up early.

Shadow hugged the blanket to his chest, purposefully not looking at the corner of the room. "Go away," he mumbled.

Out of his peripheral vision, Shadow saw the shadowy figure glitch and phase out of existence, like a bad horror movie. His shoulders slumped. Maybe it would actually leave him alone today.

^ hallucinations are pretty terrifying, i imagine :( (disclaimer, i don't have them myself). he's trying so hard to deal with it but unfortunately interacting is only making them stronger.

Then Maria appeared right in front of him, all rosy cheeks and bouncing yellow curls, smiling widely despite the blood soaking through the front of her dress. Shadow jumped back, suppressing a scream.

^ second clue! i tried describing This maria in very healthy? terms. rosy cheeks, bouncy curls. we both know the real maria wouldn't have looked like that. this is an extremely idealized version of her.

"You're going to try to run away again, aren't you? You should. You've gotten so close the last eight times." Maria drawled sarcastically. Except it wasn't Maria, Maria would never be so cruel. At least, Shadow thought.

He was definitely going to run away, though. But not because she - because it had told him to.

^ shadow knows this isn't maria, but his mental health is way too messed up to be making any clear judgment calls. he still tries to make sure not to validate it's existence though.

Whipple had a small backyard, only half an acre with some cheap plastic lawn chairs and a grill he hadn't touched in the time Shadow had been staying here. Shadow walked to the edge of the property, where the grass ended and the Montana woods began. He was going to get out of here if it killed him.

^ fun fact, I went to the sonic wiki to see if i could find a page on wade's house since it was in the second movie. there is! not much info on the backyard, but i imagine him as the kind of guy who wants to have barbecues but can't because everyone makes up excuses not to go. rip.

Shadow hissed. Every molecule of his leg was on fire and it was getting worse. He shuffled forward. The sensation was spreading to his chest and arms. Keep going, keep going-

His legs buckled underneath him. Shadow reached with his hands, clawing at the pinestraw. His vision was growing fuzzy. If he could just drag himself far enough away, if he could just get out-

^ em dashes my overly used loves lol.

"Shadow?" Whipple set him down inside the property line. "What are you- oh, not again. Come on, dude, GUN's going to kill me," he groaned. Shadow crossed his arms. He had been so close! He'd actually made it a whole yard this time!

^ wade...DOES care about shadow, in his own way, but he's still at the point of seeing him as the "dangerous" (read: edgy) government experiment he's obligated to babysit. shadow doesn't think very highly of him either, since he internally calls him by his last name instead of wade. it helps create a sense of distance.

too bad they're not actually getting that distance 😌✌️

#ask #livingthewritelife-things #ficposting

[awakeshedreams]

sugar and spice ( 1 )

pairing : resident bad boy!jjk x model student!reader

setting : highschool!au x stepbrother!au

summary :

a messy highschool!au x stepbrother!au where model student reader who has quite a few dirty little secrets sees her world take an unexpected turn when her mother comes home one day with an engagement announcement, to the father of none other than the school's resident bad boy.... Jeon Jungkook.

genre : smut, for laughs, kinda pornish, slow burn with collosaly overwhelming sexual tension

rating: soft m ( for now ) due to adult content

warnings : unconventional relationship of sexual nature, tropes and clichès, teenagers partaking in porn-esque activities, made up things with made up people happening in a made up world, don't like don't read XD

wordcount : 2.3K

a/n : i've been fighting in a long standing war and I have lost. the man known as jeon jungkook had his foot on my neck for years and today, I have finally submitted to my fate and surrendered to his reign.

yes. after a hundred years, i'm writing again. specifically, writing for bts. particularly, writing for jungkook. its been a long time coming.

life just took over and I transitioned into an adult and kind of grew out of the state of mind I was in before. but. sigh. jeon jungkook has been tormenting me the whole time. it was only a matter of time before i relapsed honestly.

so here I am again. in mind, body and spirit, a different person from who I was before but still the same in the sense that with the way bts have my whole heart, jk will always be the demon in the corner of my room that I invite to bed for a cuddle even though it's (probably really) not good for me.

do not misconstrue. I love him more than I can say. but. sigh. he has me in a chokehold, loves. please try to understand where I'm coming from.

anyways, enough with this ranting. you all came here for the nitty gritty so let me not hold you hostage with my dilemma rambling any longer. here's to the first bts fic i've posted in literal years. introducing- sugar and spice.

1 2

Unless they told someone, no one would have been able to guess it.

At school they were complete strangers.

She was the nice head girl with a clean record, all smiles and straight A’s. He was the mysterious bad boy with a track record, all tatted up with bruised knuckles.

She wore plaid skirts with neat pleads in them and pastel sweaters with bows at the collar. He wore jeans with rips in them and leather jackets with studs.

They couldn't have been any more different.

As far as anyone was concerned, they existed on two extreme ends of a vast spectrum.

What they didn't know was that they shared a dirty little secret.

.

You were a girl with many dirty secrets.

For instance, you used to sell nudes online. It was a side hustle you did.

Not because you needed money.

Your mom was a renowned doctor so there was more than enough of that in your life.

Not because you needed validation from people online either.

Even without the constant compliments and the praises you knew you were visually blessed with a pretty face and a nice body too.

All things considered, you simply thought you had a nice pair of tits and you took pictures of them sometimes.

Posting the shots you snapped online came much later when you heard about this website where people were getting paid crazy money for posting racy things.

‘It’s just so degrading…’ It was one of your friends, June, who sneered, pretty nose scrunched up. She fixed her long ponytail and rolled her brown eyes while looking in the mirror at her locker. ‘Who would do such a thing, am I right?’

She said this, but June was the girl who has slept with more boys than she could count on her two hands. And those were the ones she told you about.

Like every other time, you said nothing. Even when it carried on to lunch with the rest.

‘Pretty desperate if you ask me.’ Mei the stellar track runner shrugged casually as she stretched her limbs like routine.

‘Where are their parents?’ Nina the library nerd shook her head in disapproval as she fixed her glasses so it sat right on the bridge of her nose.

‘Um… I don’t think it’s … appropriate… to talk about ….’ Kiko the one who always carried a cross and bible around mumbled into her sleeve.

All your friends spoke of it in derision and repulsion of course. This was a school for proper children so they were proper girls. At least they were supposed to be.

Regardless the conversation sparked a curiosity in you.

So you made an account and uploaded your first picture. Nothing bizarre. Just your tits in a pretty lace bra.

You made sure to keep your face out of the frame because that was the smart thing to do and you were nothing if not the smartest student in school.

In all honesty, you weren’t expecting anything out of it. In fact, in between work with student council and tutoring your juniors with finals right around the corner, you even forgot about it for an entire month.

It was by a complete whim that you decided to open the app while you’d been unwinding at your desk following a tedious day at school.

To say you were amused by the response you found waiting for you would have be a grave understatement.

You were staring at the four figure digit that now sat in your bank account.

Reading through the comment section was even more interesting.

There were all sorts of people there who had all sorts of things to say. Ranging from honestly sweet to downright dirty.

You had never been brought to tears laughing in her life before until then.

It was just so funny to see people misbehave and lose their minds over a pair of tits.

From then on it just sort of became a thing.

.

But that wasn't the worse of your secrets.

You were making a name for yourself on the crude web months later.

The next step was naturally to move from making taking pictures to making videos. Since you was already in too deep you didn’t see why not.

So you upgraded and opened another account. An amateur one where your touched yourself for an audience.

You were no prude.

You might have never been touched by a boy before but you had touched yourself plenty times. Stress and frustration came hand in hand with being head girl. Since you couldn’t quite vent it out at the annoying troublemakers at school, this was your second best option.

Third was watching porn, but that was mostly when you were extremely bored.

But that wasn’t where that little endeavor ended.

Later on it became a lot more risqué.

.

It all started when your mom hit you with a marriage announcement.

She met a guy on her business trip who she really liked and she was convinced he was the one.

Your mom had a tragic history of being a bad judge of character.

You’ve had this conversation at least five times since you became old enough to understand that boys and girls who were just friends didn’t kiss and sleep with each other.

Most times, it felt like she was doing it because she thought you needed a dad around.

You might have once, when you were younger and your mom was too busy with work to be there. But she worked from home these days and you were soo busy with school to worry about things like that.

This time it was like she was doing it for her. You were glad.

Your mom looked genuinely happy when she spoke about this guy.

Who were you to get in the way?

.

She spent almost the whole weekend in the kitchen. It was the longest you’ve seen her in there in your entire life.

She was excited for the dinner on Sunday.

Mr Jeon was the name of the chosen man.

He was coming over with his kid. A son, his only family. His wife passed away years ago.

You wore the dress your mom picked out for you, something cream in color and off the shoulders that brushed your knees. She looked pretty in her champagne dress. It was different from the office slacks and loose blouses you were used to seeing her in.

You stood by her at the door while the guests came through.

Lifting your head from a polite bow, you found herself staring straight into an achingly familiar pair of glinting dark eyes and went completely still.

‘Sweetie,' Your mother said sounding delighted, a soft hand on your stiff shoulder. 'This is Mr Jeon and his son Jungkook.’

Ah. Fuck.

‘Jeon dear, this is my daughter. Isn’t she lovely?’

.

Dinner was a mild affair, with small talk and the occasional clinking of cutlery on fine china.

From the outside looking in, you probably looked the picture perfect family already.

Only if no-one looked close enough.

Arms crossed, tongue in cheek. Your discomfort could be detected from miles away.

The two adults were oblivious.

The dark eyed boy with the slightest wave to his nape touching, brow grazing, ear covering onyx hair sat across you though; he took note of this with a passing glance and wordlessly returned to his food.

Jeon Jungkook had a countenance that betrayed his reputation.

Even though you’ve never talked, you knew plenty about him and you were sure he knew a lot about you too.

You went to the same school.

Dressed as he was in a crisp white dress shirt buttoned at the wrist and dark tailored pants with a fine belt on, it might have been hard to tell what kind of person he really was.

You lifted her gaze from your plate to look study him wordlessly, idly twisting the noodles with your fork.

People either called him the black sheep or the dark cloud but for you, Jeon Jungkook was the school’s resident lone wolf.

He smoked in the secluded areas on campus, sometimes playing his guitar. Beat up people who got on his nerves, sometimes using his guitar. Slept in class the rare times he was there, many times on his guitar.

Being his senior, you had never seen any of any of that for yourself. But you received plenty reports weekly to come to a sound conclusion.

There was no way people hated him enough to join hands in solidarity and make this all up.

It was quite the contrary actually. He had an alarming number of fans.

On the surface level you couldn’t see why. Most times you saw him, he looked bored out his mind and honestly, intimidating.

Maybe it was the tattoos. Or the ripped skinny jeans. Or the leather jackets with studs.

Maybe it was the domineering height and fit frame and structured face.

Maybe it was the intense dark eyes or the silky ruffled hair.

Even then, you failed to see the irresistible appeal in him. All those things that made him up only added to his unapproachable aura.

Bottom line was, he was bad news.

.

You didn’t want to be a spoil sport.

But how much of a thug your mom’s boyfriend’s son was shouldn’t be something that would make her like him less.

They were both their own people. Right ?

It was just that you just didn’t want her to be shocked and devastated if something happened later. When it happened.

Yet it seemed the serious conversation would have to wait.

After dinner your mom suggested you head to the living room to chat over wine and cheese.

You stayed back to do take out the dishes.

Earlier, your mom had stood to do it instead at first.

‘Don’t bother with that, dear.’ She reached for the plates in your hands. ‘Let me do it.’

‘It’s okay, mom.’ You smiled a little. ‘This is your night. I’ll meet you in the living room.’

'Sweetie...' Your mom looked close to tears. ‘But there’s so much of it…’

‘Jungkook,’ his father's voice had cut through the moment. He was a serious man in a crisp suit with a stoic countenance. His voice was just naturally authoritarian without him trying ‘Give her a hand.’

Jungkook stood, almost robotically.

‘It’s fine.’ You said. Politely. Nicely. Tightly. ‘I can handle this much.’

You left without another word.

That had been moments ago and now you were done with cleaning.

You stood at living room entrance for a while, taking in the scene.

The two adults were exchanging moon eyes and whispering in each other’s ears at the love seat.

Jungkook was sitting on a solo seat, but he was on his phone, completely unbothered by what was happening.

Your mom seemed to think it was the perfect time to pull out the photo album right then and there upon seeing you.

It was embarrassing but at least you knew you didn’t have to worry about the pictures spreading at school.

Jungkook was looking, picking up a picture occasionally to rove over, but he wasn’t the type to do that.

He also wasn’t the type to stare but you felt his glance shifting to you and lingering multiple times.

Once, you caught his eyes and he just stared at you across the coffee table wordlessly with a curious tilt to his head, idly flipping a picture of you dressed as a knight in glitter shining armor for Halloween at eight in his hands.

Honestly, it was starting to get annoying.

But you endured. For your mom’s sake.

.

Your alarm went off at exactly ten.

As subtly as you could, you excused yourself with an apology to the guests, saying you weren't really feeling well.

In hindsight you probably should have used a better excuse.

Your mom was notorious when it came to worrying, especially when it comes to your health.

Also, you probably should’ve locked the door before undressing just for good measure since people were over.

But in the moment, you were too busy setting your camera up where you were kneeling on the floor at the foot of the bed to be concerned about that.

That day you were testing out a new toy.

.

Distractedly, you took note of a couple of people asking you if that was your boyfriend’s shirt you had lifted over your tits.

You ignored them.

Couldn’t a girl own an oversized tee without getting any flack?

Trivial comments like that aside, a good majority of the audience are fawning over how wet you were and how perfect you bouncing tits look being played with.

Your head fell back and your eyes fluttered shut.

You were sitting there, knees raised to your chest and legs splayed, your gushing pussy in full display where the toy was stuffed deep into her tightness, vibrating pleasantly.

‘I’m close…’ you mumbled throatily, squeezing your tits and pinching your stiff nipples in between your moving fingers. You moved your hips move faster, feeling the toy buzz against fluttering walls. You took a hand off one of your tits to rub at your engorged clit. ‘Fuckfuckfuck…’

Deep in your high, you didn’t hear the door open and close with a foreboding click.

You only heard your name being called by a deep, smooth voice through the heady haze.

Instantly you stilled.

When you snapped your head to look over her shoulder Jungkook was there, hands in his pockets, leaning against your doorframe with his sleeves drawn up to his elbows, muscle roped, inked skin on full display.

When he tilted his head to the side a little, appraisively, you dared to say as a quaking chill ran down your spine and your entire body felt like it was about to burst into flames, a bit of his hair fell over his face.

His eyes were like two black in the dark as he took you in, dragging his gaze up and down your exposed body languidly.

In the back of your mind, you wished the ground would part and swallow you whole.

‘Your mom,' he starts, capturing your attention wholly, dark gaze finally flickering to your face, his voice suddenly lower, hoarser. ‘She sent me over to check on you.’

It took you a moment to realize where you were, who you were, who he was.

It was like a bucket of cold water had been dropped over your head.

Jeon Jungkook, the school's resident trouble maker, soon to be your step brother, just walked in on you fingering yourself in in front of a recording camera.

Well. Yeah.

You gulped.

You were royally fucked.

depending on the response I get I might ( most probably will ) delete this. not because I'm ashamed of my work. because I'm embarrassed of myself. I really swore to never write again and here I am. sigh. yes, I have seen my previous works and noticed just how terrible they were and this is a big reason why. so sorry for putting you through that. a million apologies.

also, that's right. I have adopted a new style which might not be to everyone's liking. another reason why.

anyways, if you liked this filth ( i know it seems mild but I can tell you it's very likely gonna get worse ) please idk uh... fuck this isn't ao3. hm.

like and drop by in the ask box if you liked it and want to see more. it makes me happy. its like serotonin fuel to me.

have a nice day. see you next time ( maybe ). stay fresh. yeah. 💜💜.

#bangtan #bts #bts angst #bts fluff #bts imagine #bts scenario #bts smut #bts au #jeon jungkook #jungkook scenario #jungkook imagine #jungkook smut #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #bts high school au #jungkook high school au

[galacticwildfire]

Memories | Bucky Barnes

Four

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x oc

Summary: Bucky and Ada become dangerously close while she receives her verdict and struggles with her past being revealed.

Warnings: mentions of involuntary hysterectomy, flashbacks to extreme violence. kissing. fluff. sexism. drinking. much flirting.

Word count: 5.2k

A/N: bucky is THAT type of man

~

~

~

I'm trying to wave cigarette smoke out the window with a blanket in Peggy and I's room when there's a knock at the door.

"Come in!" I call out and I look over my shoulder to see Bucky, here just as promised.

"You nervous?" he asks at my mildly disheveled state.

"I'm fine, just trying to get the smoke out of here before Peggy comes back," I tell him, hiding my ash tray beneath my bed. "She doesn't like it and well, she's already shot at one person today."

"Right," he says with a look of amusement on his face. "You know you've got a pretty damn good right hook."

"Well, thank you," I say, straightening my skirt. "I'd feel bad if Steve wasn't a supersoldier."

He laughs. "Well it's never stopped him from getting into fights before. Back when he was just a little guy from Brooklyn I'd be the one to step in and end it."

"I'm sure you were," I say looking him up and down in his uniform. "It must be strange for you. One moment you're bidding him farewell and the next he's there all suited up as Captain America, almost a foot taller, and well, he certainly isn't that little guy from Brooklyn anymore. I know I was rather stunned by the effect the serum had even after I'd had it myself."

"Well, I won't lie it was sure as hell a surprise," he says leaning against the wall with a fond smile. "But I couldn't be prouder of him. All he wanted was to join the army and look at him now. Last night before you showed up I told him I wasn't following Captain America, I was following that little guy from Brooklyn who was too dumb to stay out of a fight."

There's no hint of jealousy in his voice, just pure pride in his friend. And that says more about his heart than flowers ever could.

"And soon hopefully I'll be following you as well," he continues and tilts his head. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"With Steve the serum changed him completely," he says and looks me up and down. "Why didn't it do the same with you? I mean you're fit there's no question about that, but you know, you aren't exactly bulked up."

It's a valid question, something no one has thought to ask.

"Steve was given a single dose of the finalised serum, whereas I was given several experimental versions," I explain while he listens attentively. "Steve changed physically but very little else was affected. With me it was quite psychological and physiological. My pain threshold was raised as well as my resistance to certain chemical agents and other environmental factors which would weaken a typical person, such as venoms and diseases. While Steve was bulked up considerably my greatest physical changes were in felixibility, stamina, reflexes, as well as giving me senses akin to that of an animal, better hearing and scent, an overall hyperawareness of my surroundings. My metabolic rate was increased as well as my cell replenishment rate, so I heal faster than the typical human. There were certainly psychological measures taken to attempt to make me compliant, mind control, however that part obviously failed much to the Colonels disappointment. They also intended for me to age more slowly so I could be of use to them for a longer period of time but that's yet to be determined."

"You're only twenty one aren't you?" he asks and I nod, before realising I don't even know how old he is.

"And what about you?"

"Twenty six," he answers and I raise an eyebrow. "What?"

A smile plays on my lips as I pat his cheek. "You have a baby face when you're clean shaven."

He laughs loudly and shakes his head at me, holding me by the waist and moving us back towards the other wall until my back's pressed against it, teasingly laughing in my ear "What was that?"

"At ease soldier, I never said you weren't handsome," I laugh, holding his cheek and biting my lip as I look into those damn blue eyes. "Because you've got me all red in the face."

"It's a pretty look on you doll," he says and I struggle to form any coherent words, but somehow I do, perhaps not the most responsible ones, but certainly the only ones on my mind.

"How about that kiss?" I ask and he smiles as he leans in, only for us to be once again interrupted, this time by the sound of a throat being cleared.

We look to see Peggy in the doorway, standing there with her arms crossed. "Meeting, now."

"Yes Mam," Bucky says while I give her a guilty smile. She shakes her head as she walks out and Bucky squeezes my waist. "Come on we can finish this later, we better get going."

"I'll hold you to that," I say as we walk outside to meet Peggy who is less than impressed but also completely unsurprised. "So, where too?"

We follow her to one of the many meetings rooms within the base as Bucky briefs us on what Steve's planning. "He's put the team together, myself and some other guys from the 107th. It'll be just us in there though from what he said, I still don't have any idea what Phillips will say."

"That's alright," I assure him. "He's the one who should be worried, not me."

"I would also recommend the pair of you keep this well behind closed doors," Peggy says. From the stiffness of her voice she must be speaking from personal experience. "Being a woman in our position is difficult enough, but god forbid the moment a man is in the picture they'll find any way to use it to discredit you."

Bucky and I share a look, a question of what exactly this even is. But all I know is that I don't want it to end here.

"It's alright," he says quietly, his hand on my back as we reach the meeting room. "Don't let him rile you up."

"No promises," I say as his hand falls away and we walk in, taking our seats beside Steve, Senator Brandt present as well. It seems Phillips felt the need to bring in the big guns.

"Colonel, Senator," I greet, knowing that now is time to drop the snark.

"Miss Morgan," the senator sighs, setting my rather heavy file on the table. "What are we going to do with you?"

"I have several suggestions," I reply.

"Suggestions which Captain Rogers has made me aware of, suggestions which I personally do not agree with."

"Then how about professionally?" I ask, demonstrating my way with words. "You requested that Erksine bring me to America due to my skill set which you are well aware of, a transaction if you will. You have had me sitting on the back burner for far too long. My reputation as the Red Widow is known among the soldiers, yet they do not associate me with the Soviet Union or Hydra. Thanks to your propaganda they see me as an American pin-up girl which dispels your fears that my Russian citizenship may affect their ability to trust me. Respect of course is another issue, but that is one which you created when you chose to strip me down as an insult to Hydra, when you mocked them by demonstrating that I was now property of the United States."

"You are bold accusing us of propaganda," he says.

"My apologies, let me rephrase," I say while Peggy gives me a warning look. "Thanks to your patriotic materials which were used in a demonstration of American power. Power you had gained by acquiring myself as an asset. An asset which you have misused through your USO shows, just as you have recognised you have misused Steve, which is why you are allowing him to draft his own team. A team which includes me."

Senator Brandt asks Steve "She didn't force you into this did she?"

"No sir," Steve says. "I was the one who sought her out to assist me in rescuing the prisoners due to her skill set and she demonstrated just how great of an asset she is."

"Senator, this woman is a danger to America," Phillips says. "If you look within that file-"

"I will look in that file in a moment. First I would like to hear testimonies on her behalf."

Steve nods and looks at Bucky. "Sergeant Barnes was one of the prisoners she freed and my right hand man, he agrees that she should be on the team."

"Why is that Sergeant Barnes?" Brandt asks him while Phillips rolls his eyes.

"You are aware of what she can do, the enhancements she has from Hydra. I don't think I need to repeat that she is physically the perfect soldier, but what I need to mention is what really makes her a soldier that I want to fight beside," he says, and I listen closely. "The colonel keeps calling her 'that Russian woman' but she was born in America to an American father who was a soldier. She only returned to Russia against her will after her father was killed at Pearl Harbor. Her education in Russia wasn't her choice, and she escaped to America to pursue a life here the moment she got the chance, but like I said, she was forced by Hydra to go back. She wasn't their soldier she was their prisoner. Colonel Phillips keeps stating she is an enemy to America, but her entire life she fought to live as an American. If she was loyal to Hydra, or Stalin, or whatever else you think, then why would she go behind enemy lives to rescue hundreds of American men, myself included."

His words leave me stunned, and I know he sees the truth in me. His eyes meet mine and no words need to be said.

Brandt becomes curious. "You seem to know a great deal about her past despite only meeting not long ago."

"I take it upon myself to get to know the soldiers I fight beside in the field," he answers. "Especially considering the words the Colonel has for her I wanted to find out the truth for myself."

"Yes," Peggy says chiming in. "His treatment of her has been extremely personal, bordering on outright discrimination. Going as far to insult her in the presence of other soldiers, including myself and Sergeant Barnes without provocation."

"I have provocation-"

"Enough," Brandt says in annoyance and looks at Phillips. "I suggest you use this time to present the evidence you have promised is within that file."

My stomach drops as he opens it and I look at my hands, unable to meet Bucky's eye.

"If her position as one of Stalin's favourites isnt enough, when our government decided to work with Doctor Erksine to acquire her, she killed seven highly trained American soldiers before she was successfully sedated with thirteen times the regular dosage."

"Remember Katya, until we are on American soil your name is Sasha, you are five years old and I am your mother," I told her as we hid onboard the train to France from Russia. "It is important no one knows who we are so the bad men can't find us."

"Lina," my sister whispered, clutching Papa's doll in her hands. "Are they going to kill us?"

"No," I answered, armed with only a knife, all I could escape with when I intercepted the soldiers who took her from her bed and tried to take her to the Red Room. "I won't let them hurt you.'

"Where were the soldiers taking me?" she asked, just six years old, too young for what my mother had planned.

"They were to take you somewhere far away, the same place they took me when I was your age," I told her, my blood still boiling. "They will do very bad things to you, which is why we are going back home to America. Where I will raise you."

"Will I go to an American school?" she asked and I nodded, fighting tears.

"You will go to a good school, you will never have to learn the things I did," I promised her, my sister, so many years younger than I and the closest thing I would ever have to my own child. "I swear it."

The train skidded to a holt and I pushed her behind me the moment before soldiers came to stand over us, then hope filled me at the sight of the American flag they wore.

"Please," I pleaded in my best American accent, the plan now changing. "We are trying to return home to the states. Please help us get home."

But the soldier pulled out a gun and aimed it at my head. "Are you the Red Widow?"

"Pardon?" I asked, trying to play dumb, trying to be just another American making it home.

"Is your name Adelina Viktoria Morga?"

Caught blindsided in the moment I pressed my lips together, putting my faith in my country, and nodded.

"Come with us miss, you are safe."

I took the soldiers hand as he pulled me to my feet.

"Come," I said to my sister, gripping her hand tight. "The soldiers are bringing us home."

And then hell rained down on us.

The soldier fell to the ground, his head a mess of blood and brains and I jumped in front of my sister, taking the fallen soldiers rifle and opened fire, unable to take the time or risk to distinguish between Hydra and the Americans. I could hear my sisters terrified screaming over the gunfire until finally the last bullet case fell at my feet.

"Lie down, don't move, don't speak. Just lie down and I will come back," I promised her, forcing her to the floor and using the soldiers body to cover hers.

I ran out, taking a bullet in the back as I took down the first Hydra soldier who tried to grab me, taking his gun and fighting until the last, fighting until the bullets and fists forced me to my knees and I was jabbed in the thigh.

As everything began to go dark I heard her screaming my name.

"Lina, Lina!"

Out of my peripheral vision I saw Hydra dragging her kicking and screaming.

"Katya!" I screamed, fighting desperately against the squadron of armed guards who surrounded me, who forced a gas mask over my mouth. "No!"

"Get her on the damn plane before more ships come! Leave the girl and retreat!" I heard a man order as I ripped off my gas mask and with the last strength I had cut the throat of the man standing between my sister and I, with blood covering me I ran forward only to be met with a bullet in the leg.

"Don't touch her!" I screamed as the Americans tore me from my sister, my sister who Hydra took screaming. "Don't fucking touch her!"

With one last needle in the back I fell limp, yet I could still hear her screaming my name as the Americans dragged me on board their plane, as they stole me from Hydra, leaving my sister as payment.

The room is silent and I hear Phillips say to Bucky. "I assume you didn't know that before you gave your speech on her loyalty to America when she has American blood on her hands."

"This doesn't involve anyone else," I say stiffly and raise my head to look Phillips in the eye. "Is that all you have on me? That I resisted being trafficked from one obsessed scientist to another and killed the men who stabbed me with needles and tried to gas me when they promised I was safe?"

"You were held in a psychiatric facility for a year at the age of twenty," he continues. "That was before Erksine convinced the board to release you into the army. Your doctors evaluation is rather damning with accusations of psychopathy and even multiple personalities."

"I am not a psychopath," I say, keeping my voice even. "Nor do I have multiple personalities. I am simply a soldier who knows how to compartmentalise to do their job and finish whatever assignment I am given."

"Really?" he questions and I see the page he has open in my file. "Because one doctor who had been involved with Hydra gave one of these personalities a name, the winter-"

"Are you finished interpreting what doctors attempted to diagnose me with after I had been held in a cell and experimented on for a year?" I ask, deflecting before they can detect any panic in my voice. "Ask your own soldiers who had been used in Hydra's experiments about their condition before judging my own."

I feel Bucky's eyes on me, yet I can't meet them.

"She's right," he says and I can hear the heaviness in his voice. "It's not her fault, and she isn't a psychopath. With all due respect that evaluation is a load of crap. She just keeps marching on like the rest of us have to."

Brandt takes a deep breath. "Colonel, are there any other points you would like to raise?"

"The issue of her sex."

Peggy and I exchange a look while Brandt considers this. "You're right, there are issues involving her sex, however with the right conditions in place this can be managed." Peggy averted her gaze and I realise she already knows of some of these conditions.

"Does this mean she is on the team?" Steve asks, cutting through the bullshit.

Brandt hesitates before answering "Yes."

I release a heavy breath and feel Bucky squeeze my hand beneath the table. "Thank you Senator, thank you."

"Don't get ahead of yourself," he says and looks at Phillips. "The conditions of your enlistment in the field now fall to the colonel. I strongly suggest you accept them without argument."

Phillips pushes forward paperwork, and it's clear he was prepared for this outcome.

"You will receive the title of agent and will not hold military rank. You will not commit any act of insubordination or else face punishment, including being stood down from your position as an agent and subjected to psychiatric hold and evaluation. You will not question or disobey any orders from your superiors or face punishment."

"Isn't that the same as insubordination?" I question bitterly and he glares at me.

"You will keep that smart arse mouth shut. You will not prioritise anything above the missions you receive. You will not participate in any romantic or sexual relationships."

I feel Bucky still next to me and I tilt my head. "I'm sorry but I see the soldiers running in packs to the brothels. Why am I the exception?"

"It will only be a distraction and compromise your ability to serve, as is the policy for all women enlisted within this type of service to the army. If you were to marry we would terminate your position within the army entirely."

I look at Peggy and her eyes are fixed on the table, and I realise this is a sacrifice she has made as well, the true reason why she never went any further than flirting with Steve.

"A pregnancy would be detrimental to your ability to serve this country," Senator Brandt continues and my jaw clenches. "We are being extremely generous due to the impracticality of having a menstruating woman in the field. It is already a burden on your fellow soldiers."

Steve is stunned into silence while Bucky clears his throat. "That- that is hardly a burden Senator. We're soldiers, blood isn't an issue for us."

"I was created to be the perfect soldier," I say stiffly and Bucky must notice the shift in my voice from how he looks at me. "I assure you my sex will not interfere."

"But Miss Morgan, it does."

"Agent Morgan" I correct harshly.

"A soldier should not have a womb," Phillips mutters. "The last thing we want is her getting captured in the field and Hydra deciding to make more supersoldiers the reproductive way."

And for a moment I feel so sick I almost have to leave the room. I feel Peggy, Steve and Bucky's eyes on me, waiting for me to snap. "I never thought of that," Brandt says to Phillips. "Perhaps we should discuss options with the doctors to ensure she cannot be forcibly impregnated-"

"I don't have a womb!" I spit out sharply at the mention of a doctor going anywhere near me again. Peggy's mouth falls open in realisation, aware that in our time sharing rooms these past months I've never once bled.

"Don't be silly, you're a woman, of course you have a womb," Brandt says while my eyes burn and he falls silent as I push my chair back and lean over the table, my hands gripping the edge tight.

"The Red Room where I was raised made sure I would be the perfect soldier, made sure there would be no inconveniences," I tell him, trying to keep my voice from trembling. Despite my best efforts it does, not with tears but with rage. "I was eighteen when they tied me down and dragged me into the surgery, forced my legs open and listened to me scream as they put their forceps in me and cut away the things which made me a woman, they ripped it all out and sewed me back up." The room is dead silent as I reach for the papers and scribble my signature, done with this. "I assure you, I'm not a woman, I'm a soldier. Hydra made sure of that. There won't be any inconveniences." "

I throw the papers down in front of the colonel, and without another word leave the room before I do something they may live to regret.

~

It's dark when I'm sitting on the roof of the barracks, looking out at the city with a cigarette between my fingers, trying to forget, but I could still feel it in my body, could still feel them ripping me open without a single drug in my veins to numb the pain.

"You have graduated your Russian academy and now you can focus on further education here in the states," Papa said the summer I returned home from Russia at eighteen. "Before you know it you'll be married and giving me grandchildren."

"Papa," I whispered hoarsely, terrified, not only for myself, but for Katya. The reason I dared speak of it, knowing he was the only person who could save her from the Red Room before it was too late. "I can't have children."

"What do you mean you can't-" he began dismissively then fell silent as I collapsed to the floor in tears, the stitches they put in me still healing. "Lina?"

"They did something to me," I sobbed, for the first time in my life just a girl crying for her father to help her. "Papa they did something to me."

"What do you mean?" he asked crouching down in front of me, having never seen me cry before. "What did they do to you?"

I couldn't breathe, couldn't form any words. It was only what seemed like hours later, after scotch and the good pills, that I could get the words out.

"They strapped me to a table and wheeled me into a lab. They opened my legs and-" he stared in horror as I tried to get the words out. "They didn't even give me any drugs. They just put their tools in me and then- then they started cutting." I was a trembling mess with my legs pressed tight together. "They pulled something out of me and then more. They kept cutting away and wouldn't stop. There was so much blood, I thought I was going to die."

And in that moment the American dream slipped from my fingers, and I would forever be a soldier.

I'm silent as I hear his footsteps, already drilled into my memory, and don't say a single word as he sits beside me.

"I hoped we'd be celebrating tonight," Bucky says, trying to lighten the mood, but there is no lightening it. "Ada-"

"I don't need pity," I say thickly. "I'm just glad to be part of the team."

He nods, struggling to find words. "Peggy was real worried about you after you left. She explained what you said to Steve and I, explained what they did to you."

"Then you know why I won't be a problem in the field," I answer, it being one of the reasons I'm sitting up here instead of with her. Too many questions. "But I'm fine, I have no reason not to be."

"You don't have to lie Ada," he says quietly and finally I look at him, finding my weakness in those eyes. "Not to me."

And even after all of that, he's still fighting for me. Still here beside me.

"Do you still want to know me?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

My voice breaks. "You know why."

I blink tears away but he catches them, I still as he touches my cheek, his thumb wiping them away. The first time in my life tears haven't been punished.

The first truly kind touch I've ever felt.

"Do you really think that changes a thing?" he asks and I'm trembling beneath his touch, having never been so vulnerable in my life.

"It does," I whisper hoarsely and drop the American accent, my naturally thick Russian accent coming through. "I'll never be your American woman."

"Do you think that for a moment I ever looked at you and saw the American housewife?" he asks me, nothing in his eyes proving him a liar, only an honest man. "No, I saw a chance for something far more than that, and I still do."

And yet I still can't believe his words. "You don't want a nice American girl who can give you babies and cook you dinner?"

"If I did I'd be married," he laughs quietly and shakes his head. "I don't want a nice American girl. I want you.'

And I'm shaking as my lips meet his, the kiss anything but gentle until I tear my lips from his.

"I- I'm sorry," I whisper turning my head away, but he gently turns it back towards him, his eyes kind.

"Don't be sorry," he says gently with a soft smile, stroking my cheek. "Not one bit."

I can hardly breathe as he leans in and presses a soft kiss to my lips, experimental even, his hand slipping into my hair as he tilts my chin up, kissing me deeper, slowly. Allowing me this quiet moment to feel something I never thought I would.

"I've never let a man touch me before," I murmur against his lips. "I've never had a man- a man like this."

I've never had one hold me, touch me, care for me. Nothing like what I've shared with James in such a short time.

"Is this alright?" he asks and I nod my head breathlessly, his lips tasting like a freedom I've never known.

"I want you James."

"Then come here."

His arms are open for me, holding me close as I slide into his lap, for the first time in my life feeling like more than a soldier. Feeling like the woman I thought the Red Room killed. His lips against mine until the first drops of rain begin to fall.

"Come on," he says, taking my hand and leading me off the roof, beneath cover at the back of the base, away from prying eyes.

He kisses me again and my tears dry, safe in his arms. In the arms of a man who has fought for me more than any other. Breathlessly I pull away smiling and meet his eyes, eyes which see me truly.

He holds me by the waist, his smile matching my own. "You really are something Adelina."

"That can be said for you as well James," I breath, my arms wrapping around his neck. "I've never known a man like you."

"So I take it that was a good first kiss?"

I laugh, truly laugh without a care in the world. "Very good." He smiles as he kisses me again and I look over his shoulder to ensure no one else is near. "You know that they won't like me fraternising with a Sergeant."

"That sounds like a them problem," he dismisses, peppering kisses across my face.

"Hmm, it does, doesn't it," I say holding his handsome face, my eyes never leaving his. "So you and me huh?"

"There's worse things," he teases, bumping his nose against mine. "Like the fact we're going to have to keep this secret."

"Well, I'm sure that will be easier when we're in the middle of god knows where with just us and a few other guys."

"You aren't wrong," he says and looks out towards the city. "You know, it's not too late to celebrate."

"Celebrate?"

"The rest of the units at the pub with Steve, their joining conditions were an open tab at the bar."

"Then what are we waiting for?" I grin as he takes my hand and we run like two kids through the rain to the city, and I had never been so happy in my life.

~

By the time we reach the bar we are moderately wet for the second time today, with nothing but smiles on our faces. Bucky lets go of my hand as we approach Steve and the rest of the men yet from the looks on their faces they already know.

"Hey guys," Bucky says with an innocent hand on my back. "Allow me to introduce you to Adelina Morgan, the Red Widow."

Steve looks at Bucky and I knowingly, he and Buck know each other far too well to hide this from each other.

"Mam," the men greet respectfully, and I look at the diverse group of men, already knowing we'll get along.

Buck takes it upon himself to introduce us. "Ada this is Jim Morita, James Falsworth, Gabe Jones, Jacques Dernier and Dugan." The men share a look that Bucky no doubt recognises.

"And before any of you idiots get any ideas she's got a hell of a right hook," Buck says with a proud smirk. "Just ask Steve."

"It's true," Steve shrugs while the men invite me with open arms to join them.

It's past midnight when they're singing drunkenly in the middle of the bar, leaving Bucky and Steve seated with me.

"When's our first mission?" I ask Steve, Bucky's arm leaning on the back of my chair.

"We leave in two days," he says, as excited as I am to finally get out in the field. "You ready?'

"More than ready."

The men call Steve over, leaving Bucky and I alone in the back of the bar.

"What do you say sweetheart?" Bucky asks me, raising his drink. "To hell and back?"

"To hell and back."

#bucky x reader #bucky x oc #bucky fic #bucky barns fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky fanfic #bucky fucking barnes #bucky barnes x oc #bucky barnes x original female character #bucky x original character #bucky x original female character #bucky x ofc #bucky barnes smut #40's bucky #40's Bucky barnes #Steve rogers #captain america #marvel #the winter soldier #winter soldier fanfic #fanfic #fanfiction #winter soldier x oc #bucky barnes x reader

[allegra-writes]

"Bad together"

Prologue: Benjamin Reilly

Peter Parker x Reader

General audiences

Warnings: none.

"And if I'm dead to you

Why are you at the wake?

Cursing my name, wishing I stayed"

My tears ricochet - Taylor Swift

"... It's a disaster! Look at her! It's like someone took a look at Black Cat, selected everything that made her sexy and then took it out!"

Black Cat. The name froze the young photographer on his tracks right outside his boss' office. He hadn't heard that name in a long time, the last sighting had been well over a year ago. He would know.  After all, it had been him, the very last person to have seen Felicia Hardy, alive or dead.

"What are you talking about? That looks hot af, not to mention badass!" Jade's persuasive voice reached his ears, making him smirk: It was no secret the chief editor had a soft spot for the young intern. And, on her part, the petite brunette was a firecracker. Poor old Jameson didn't stand a chance. "Come on, dad. Single handedly taking down three of the Kingpin's goons? That's impressive. It deserves to be one of the slides!" 

"Not if we don't get a higher quality picture. That blurry video is good enough for a thumbnail, but not for a slide" Slides were a big deal, they were the Dailybugle.net's equivalent of a front page, and if J. Jonah Jameson took something seriously, it was his web site. He prided himself in the quality of the "receipts" of his "tea", as if that validated the trashiness of the bullshit articles he posted, more fiction from hyper imaginative wannabe writers than serious work from real reporters. 

"Well, then let's get the pictures. Where is that star photographer of yours?" 

The photographer rolled his eyes, typical Jade. As if the queen of cool didn't know his name. As if she hadn't graced his bed a handful of times already. 

"That's a good question. Dolores, get me Reilly!"

"I'm here, Jonah" Ben finally stepped inside the office, throwing an envelope on Jameson's desk before throwing himself on a chair across it. He could feel Jade's eyes on him, almost like a physical caress, trailing from the long, slick back curls on the top of his head, to the muscles of his arms, threatening to rip open the seams at the sleeves of his white t-shirt, to his jean clad thighs. Still, he didn't turn to look at her, refusing to give her the satisfaction. 

"What do you have for me today, boy?"

Ben gesticulated vaguely with his head in the direction of Jade, and Jameson caught the hint. 

"Jade, out!" 

"But, dad, my story!" The petulant reply left her mouth before she could stop it, undoubtedly the product of years of habit. But she had the grace to look embarrassed and leave the office without another word, trying to save whatever professionalism she had left. 

Once she was gone, Jameson opened the envelope, flipping through the various pictures of a masked figure swinging around New York in a black and red suit. 

"Hmmm… these are good" the older man praised, staring at the images of a frustrated robbery at 5th avenue

Ben snifled nocomitically,

"There was a fire at 16th avenue happening at the same time" He offered, "we could use that. Spider-Man forgets his roots and leaves his old neighborhood to fend for itself, running off to save some pretty socialite…"

"Oh, that is excellent! See, this is why I like you, kid. You have initiative. Unlike these snowflakes out there. Oh, but Spider-Man is a hero. Hero, my ass"

"Well, when you watch your so called hero sit back and do nothing as your life gets destroyed" Ben shrugged, "the rose colored glasses tend to fall off…"

Jameson made a face at that,

"Yeah, about that… I'm sorry. For the role the Daily Bugle played on that…"

Ben shook his head, 

"You thought you were getting the truth out there. It's not your fault to have been played, along with half the world. Plus," he added, sounding genuinely enthusiastic, "you gave me this job. And now we can really tell the truth"

"Even when our idea of the truth is somehow different" The older man scoffed, flipping around a picture of Spider-Man sat on what appeared to be a hammock of his own webs, eating a hamburger and reading something that looked suspiciously like a comic book, "Still hung up on that high schooler theory of yours?"

"Well, if it talks like a brat and acts like a brat…" Ben took out another envelope, this time containing a few burger king wrappers and, effectively, a spider-man comic book. 

"Where did you even get these?"

"Harlem" was Ben's curt reply, and Jameson knew that was as exact a location as he was going to get. 

"So you still believe this is a copycat? Some kid playing dress up"

Ben simply shrugged again. 

"Well, there seems to be an epidemic of those lately" Jameson admitted, indicating Ben to come closer, passing a tablet to him, "Jade just handled me this, take a look"

Ben took a deep breath, steeling himself, already knowing what he was going to see in it. Yet, a part of him couldn't help but hope to be wrong. To hope the silver haired figure facing three much bigger, stronger looking ones as he pressed play, wasn't the same one he had spent weeks memorizing last summer. Wasn't the body he had found solace in, when everything fell apart, once again, for the hundredth time in his life. 

To hope it wasn't you. 

But when in his twenty-two or so years of existence, had things ever gone his way? 

Ben felt the screen crack under his fingertips.

"I've heard of her" he lied through his teeth, "didn't even think she was real, to be honest. Extremely elusive, and cunning." That much was true, "I don't understand how something as mundane as a security camera managed to catch her…" 

Unless you wanted to be caught, that was. 

"Well, I don't care if she's the fucking Loch Ness monster, I want an HD picture of her on my desk tomorrow to go with Jade's article. I already have a headline: New Catastrophe Jen wreaks havoc on Hell's Kitchen" Jameson's eyes lit up with glee as he weaved his hands up in the air, like writing on an invisible marquee. 

Ben snorted

"Don't you mean Calamity Jane?"

Jameson's face fell, the color rising to his cheeks, characteristic vein popping on his forehead. 

"I meant what I meant, boy! Now, what are you still doing here? You have 24 hours to get me that picture"

"I'm going to need 72," came Ben's unphased reply, "and I want twice what you pay me for the spidey pics"

Jameson's vein looked about ready to explode,

"48 hours. And deal."

Ben jumped from his seat and bolted out of the office before his boss could change his mind, not realizing until it was too late that he was on a collision course with a sweet looking short haired blonde girl. 

"Watch where you're going! Jeez!"

"Me? You're the one who crashed against me!" 

Ben rolled his eyes, but crouched next to the girl anyway, helping her gather the papers that had been sent flying on impact back together.

"Peter? Oh my god, is that you?"

Of course. What an idiot, he should had recognized that annoying, shrilly voice the second he heard it. It had caught him off guard, something he knew he couldn't afford. But how could he had ever imagine he could run into Betty fucking Brant, Yale cum laude, in the freaking dailybugle.net headquarters of all places?

"Sorry, sweetheart. You must confuse me with someone else…" He mumbled, lowering his head even more in a vain attempt to hide his face.

"Of course not!" She insisted, "You're Peter, Peter Parker, we went to Midtown together!"

"Miss, I have no idea what you're talking about…"

"Don't be silly, Peter!" She chuckled, completely deft to his tone or the way his whole demeanor had changed the second she had called him by the old name. "How have you been? Oh, just wait until I tell Ned, he's going to be so-"

CRACK.

At last, the tablet that had been in peril ever since Jameson had put it in Ben's hands, the one that contained his assignment, met its demise, both broken halves falling to the ground, along with all the papers he had picked up for Betty. It was several moments before he could get the shaking of his hands under control, before the tar black rage inside him subsided enough for him to be able to move without shifting. But it had.

"Peter Parker is dead." He deadpanned, dark brown eyes finally meeting Betty's stunned blue ones, "Tell Ned that, he'll probably be glad to hear it"

With that, he stood up and walked away, leaving a confused and agitated Betty behind. 

To be continued...

#peter parker #peter parker x reader #tom holland #peter parker imagine #tom holland x reader #tom holland imagine #peter parker x reader smut #tom holland x reader smut #dark!peter parker #dark peter parker #venom #venom!peter parker #marvel #black cat #felicia hardy #bad together #arvin russell

[stubbedbakutoes]

Hot Date

pairing: bakugo x reader

word count: about 2k

genre: friends to lovers, jealous!bakugo

Bakugo and Y/N have this thing. They're so alright with one another and the two of them can truly simply appear at one another's places whenever to chill without calling prior and they'd presumably be allowed to hang. In spite of the fact that there are days when Y/N comes over similarly as he's going to go out and the other way around, they actually spend time with one another for the couple of moments before they go to any place they must be (despite the fact that they'd both extremely prefer to simply remain in one another's company throughout the day and night).

So when Bakugo heads toward her home, he's hoping to see her open the entryway in a couple of joggers and a shirt, possibly shorts rather than joggers. Be lo and behold, he's welcomed with her resembling a goddess and his mouth hangs open and his eyes as wide as possible as they trail down her figure. He’s never really observed her spruced up like how she is currently so he's sort of considering what did he actually do to merit this since she's so lovely and standing not too far off before him and he needs to simply up and get her and pull her in for a kiss yet he can't on the grounds that he doesn't accept that she really likes him back the way that he needs her to.

"Uh… "

"Bakugo?" Y/N chuckles a bit. "You okay?"

"What?" He squints, eating his eyes up to her face. Goddamn, that is a wonderful face. "Good, uh. Better believe it. I'm – " makes a sound as if to speak, carrying a hand to scratch the back of his neck, "– m'good. No doubt. M'good."

"Great," she grins, entertained.

"Where are you, uh. Where are you going?” He asks with a little smile, venturing into the house since she'd moved to one side to let him in.

"Not gonna lie, you came in at the wrong time." Y/N shoots him a sorry smile (and he swears he sees her do that thing that she does when she's nervous yet she can't in any way, shape or form be anxious, right? What might she be nervous about?).

"Hot date?" He jokes, and he hears the voices in his head repeatedly saying "don't say you do." Bakugo watches her shut the doorway and nod with her back facing him.

Bakugo's heart drops, "Huh? With who? When did he ask you? Do I know him?" He panics, not holding back.

Y/N finally faces him, taking small strides towards him but then the door swings open and Bakugo's eyes goes from the extremely beautiful young lady before him to none other than Kirishima standing smugly by the door. Bakugo's eyes broaden much more and he's certain he looks laughable at this moment. "Kirishima?" He glances back at Y/N. "You're going on a date with Kirishima?"

The red-haired boy wheezes and Bakugo has never detested him as much as he does now. "Why're you saying it like that, bro?" Kirishima asks with a faked hurt look all over. He inhales out a laugh, shaking his head, "nah, Im only kidding," and directs his attention to Y/N. "You ready?" He asks with a charming grin, removing a hand from his pocket and offering it to her.

"Gimme a sec. Let me get my bag first." Y/N grins back at Kirishima before leaving the two friends with one another – which wouldn't have ever been an issue since they're best mates yet the tension's too much at this moment.

"Y/N? Seriously, Kiri? Fuckin' Y/N?" Bakugo fumes the second she's too far to hear their conversation.

"What?" Kirishima shrugs. "She's hot and interesting and out of this world so is there any valid reason why I shouldn't?"

"You do know I like her, right? Ever heard of the bro code?"

Kirishima chuckles, "Sure do. However, I don't see you making a move on her. You must admit though that it's better that she's going out with me rather than some douche out there who most likely just wants to have sex with her."

"That's not anything near to being better since it's not – " He cuts himself off when he notices Y/N approaching them.

Kirishima grins once again at her. "You look so pretty," he praises, grasping her hand once more. "I'll see you later, Bakugo." Y/N simply waves at Bakugo.

"Wait!" Bakugo calls out, wrapping his fingers on her wrist gently and basically pulls her back like she's a rope and he's having a back-and-forth with Kirishima, but he's by and large far more delicate because of the fact that this is Y/N. He can't actually hurt her. "Can I talk to you for a sec?" He finally, asks sheepishly, swallowing hard.

"Sure," Kirishima says as a smile is plastered on his face yet it goes unnoticed by Bakugo and is excessively clear to Y/N.

Bakugo just pulls her aside, heading off to the kitchen so Kirishima won't have the option to listen in. "So… "

"What's up?"

Bakugo avoids her eyes, "Kirishima, huh?"

She shrugs, "Why not, you know? He's cool and stuff," she murmurs.

"Do you, um. Do you like him?"

"Uh," Y/N's mouth is suddenly dry as hell, "Ofcourse?" (It's intended to come out as a statement yet it's come out as a question and Bakugo starts to think he's hearing things)

"D-don't go on a date with him," Bakugo says out of nowhere, looking straight at her. She blinks, brows furrowing slightly, taken aback at how he’d gone from this stuttering mess to confidently blurting out that she shouldn’t go out on a date with his bestfriend. “I know what Kiri’s like, okay? He’s a great guy, really. Awesome friend. Fun to be with. But, like. He won’t treat you properly. He’s a dick. He drinks too much, parties too much. He’s not good enough for you."

Y/N’s eyes widen then. Then he's sighing, shaking his head. “No, no,” he mumbles. “Those are lies. He’s probably going to be the best damn boyfriend ever but, like. I, um. I don’t. Um.”

"Spit it out,” she smiles, bringing a hand to his upper arm gently.

“I don’t want you to date him,” he mumbles eventually, cheeks filling with colour as he does so. “I want you to date me. Not him. Not my bestfriend. I want you. And, like, Kiri knows I like you, so I don’t know why he’s doing this to me. Just, like. You belong with me, you know? Not him. So, um. Yeah. Guess I made things weird. Sorry,” he mumbles again, about to make a move to get out of the kitchen and leave the house with his head down and preferably staying in bed for the rest of forever afterwards.

"You’re serious?” She asks from behind him, quietly.

He turns, though he’s still staring at the ground, “Hmm?”

“You’re not… taking the piss? Like, just saying that you like me because I’m going on a date with Kiri?”

He snaps his head up then, brows furrowed tightly together, “Why would I do that?” He asks, and Y/N shrugs in response. He steps closer towards her, “I like you, a lot. I have liked you for a long ass time but, like, I never thought I’d have a chance, and I guess I was right in some sense – since, you know, you’re going out with Kirishima and stuff. But, um. Yeah. I do. I really like you.”

“My work here is done,” Kirishima’s voice chimes in then and they both turn to look at him with that smug smirk on his face. He salutes them, then he’s walking out the front door without another word.

“What…?” He trails off.

“He and Kaminari, they, uh,” Y/N starts. “They wanted to make you jealous, or something. Because they know I, um, like you, and they said you liked me back but, like, I didn’t believe them? Because, you know. You’re you, and I’m me, and I couldn’t comprehend you ever liking me so they came up with this dumb plan and really, I was alright with trying to move on, but then they insisted that you liked me and that by making you think I was dating someone else then you’d, you know, – ” she gestures to him, then. “– do that. So, like, um, sorry for making you think that I was going on a date with Kiri and uh – ”

Y/N’s cut off then. Not because he's angry that they’d kind of manipulated him (although he did look a little frustrated), it’s because Y/N blinked and then he's right there and he’s kissing her. And well. She’s kissing him back as hard as he’s kissing her with her arms wrapped around his body while either of his hands are cupping her face and his thumb’s stroking small circles on the skin of her cheeks.

He pulls back then, a magnificent grin lighting up his handsome face and his eyes twinkling brighter than she’s ever seen them before. “You have no idea,– ” he leans in to kiss her again, “– how long I’ve wanted to do that.”

"Trust me,– ” she mumbles back, kissing him quickly once more. “– I do.”

"So,” he finally pulls back properly, resting his forehead unto hers and intertwining their fingers together at the sides of their bodies. “You look stunning, by the way. And, like, it’d be a waste to just not make full use of you looking so goddamn beautiful, you know?”

Y/N smiles, raising an eyebrow, “Katsuki, are you asking me out on a date?”

He shakes his head, “I'm telling, love,” he grins cheekily. “But, like. Let’s just, you know. Kiss a little first. I’ve got months to make up for.”

#boku no hero academia #bnha fanfiction #bnha imagines #bnha x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #todoroki x bakugou #bakugou x deku #bnha bakugou #bnha scenarios #bnha dabi #bnha headcanons #bnha aizawa #bnha todoroki #bnha deku #bnha angst #bakugou x kirishima #katsuki bakugo headcanons #ao3 bakugou #bnha masterlist #haikyuu masterlist #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu oikawa #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x you #dazai x reader #akutagawa x reader #ushijima x reader #hq x reader

[losers-yurio]

Micky Dolenz x reader smut 

sub!Micky with hair pulling 

requested by anon (that I've grown v attached to hshsh)

taglist:@makemeyourwife-loveofmylife

Reblogs>likes 

FINISHED AT 11:30 HA, I'll go over spelling and grammar in the morning y'all deserve this right now

After a long day at work seeing your pretty boy sitting on the couch with tussled hair and a look of concentration

Coming home to him was one of your favorite things

Hearing you come in he looked up

You tossed your keys on the counter and walked over to the couch to take a seat next to him

You probably should have been too tired to be this aroused but it was the soft look on his paired with his messed up hair and the opening of his shirt that reached the middle of his chest that did you in

Sure you've seen it all before but it was I sight you never tire of seeing

Aperently Micky could see how dark your eyes were becoming with lust

He turned so that he could put his guitar up against the side table on his right

"What's on your mind y/n?" You let out a short breath before responding "You"

Turning back to look at you this time with a look of confusion playing on his features

When he didn't say anything you continued leaning in to place a small kiss to his cheek before the words left your lips

"you and your stupidly beautiful face, and how I can't stop thinking about what it would be like to have you begging under me so desperate for your release that'd you'd do almost anything to get that bliss"

This time it was his turn to let out a breath accompanied by a soft "wow"

You started to trail more light kisses down his neck, across his collarbone and down his chest to the end of the opening in his shirt

From there you moved so you were sitting completely in his lap now with his legs stretched out behind you

Out of reflex his hands imeadietly went to your hips before they made an attempt to untuck your blouse from your skirt that settled in an almost halo around you

Though before he could you took his wrists and pinned them to the arm of the couch

"oh no you dont, I'm in control tonight."

At this his eyebrows shot up in surprise

To his credit he wasn't as hesitant to give up control as you thought he would be

"Do you think you can come with me hardly doing anything like a good boy?" "Y/n..."

With the feeling of your thinly clothed core against his prominent bulge you weren't sure if that was a cry of protest or pleasure

Quite possible that it was both

You restituted yourself once more so that you were now holding both of his wrists in your left hand and you were sitting on his torso

Luckily It wasn't to difficult to shuck off his pants and briefs with only one hand especially when he was eager to help

Slowly the tips of your fingers began to ghost down his thigh being careful as to not touch his length on the way down

After reaching his knee you applied a little more pressure and slid back up a bit so that the tip of your finger was straight across from his tip

Poor thing was red and leaking pre-come

It didn't take long of fleeting touches and ones that left far too soon for his liking that finally pushed him over the edge

With a loud groan he finally reached his release with it landing on his lower abdomen

You reached over him to the tissue box in order to clean him up

"now since you've been such a good boy how about you get on your knees and remind me what that mouth of yours can do"

He had a big dopy grin

How easily he could make you come undone with just his mouth was something he was extremely proud of

You let him move out from under you making his way so that he was kneeling in front of the couch

And Infront of you

Still not exactly sure what to do while being in control of this specific situation, you just ran with it

Letting him hook his hands behind your knees to pull you closer

Still a little too high he dropped from his knees to be more level with your cunt

Moving his hands from the back of your knees to your ass he didn't hesitate to connect his mouth to your core after pressing a light kiss to the inside of your thigh

Out of habit your hands flew down to grip his hair

"fuck mick"

You'd hoped he hadn't noticed how much you were grinding on his thigh earlier but he probably had

With any luck he'd just use the fact that you were already desperate to get you off quicker and harder and maybe jokingly mention it later

Though you were still in charge it didn't feel like it

Especially when you weren't sure if he was planning to get revenge for all the teasing

You quickly pushed the thought from your mind though as you began to feel that familiar feeling in your stomach

You look down and even though you can only see part of his face your still convinced that he's the most beautiful man you've ever seen

Knowing how he liked the validation you tugged on the hair that was between your fingers Wich caused him to moan into you

Feeling your climax fast approaching you crossed your legs behind his back in an attempt to bring him closer

Getting the message his movements became faster easily being Exactly what you needed to push you over the edge

Still panting you looked back down at Micky who now looked exhausted

"come on babe let's get you into bed, you did phenomenally tonight and you need some rest" "but what about dinner?"

"We can always do a late night snack, besides I'm not hungry" he nodded before answering

"Hey y/n?" "Hm?" You should do that more often"

#if we ignore the roadtrip fic this is the longest one ive ever written #oops- #my writing #the monkees #the monkees x reader #micky dolenz #micky dolenz x reader

[cattles-bians]

damie vibecca exes au part 20

post directory

obsetress: ok but when they first meet

obsetress: at that bar on whatever night or whatever

obsetress: when dani and viola are talking

obsetress: viola's waving her hand around as she says something and dani's staring and then totally out of nowhere:

obsetress: "wanna compare hands?"

obsetress: "what?"

obsetress: "lemme see your hand"

obsetress: and dani is grabbing one of vi's with both of hers and pulling it towards her "like this"

obsetress: and then dani's pressing their palms together and viola's raising an eyebrow and dani just GRINS and then even once they lower their hands back to the bar, neither of them move away

em: dani is SO bold i would die for her

obsetress: god same

obsetress: dani keeps glancing down at them as they're talking and she is NOT subtle

obsetress: viola catches her every time

em: maybe dani gets a smidge of smthn on the corner of her mouth and viola...

obsetress: viola pulls her hand away and dani blinks and her brows do that lil thing but then viola's murmuring "here" and grazing her thumb along the corner of dani's mouth

obsetress: dani squeaks

em: love when dani gets out dani’d

obsetress: viola's like "sorry, was that... was that okay?" and dani just swallows and nods with big shining eyes and then vi kinda hesitates and (they've been talking for a couple hours at this point, touchin hands and obv v into each other) lets her thumb graze across dani's bottom lip and she murmurs "what about that?" and dani's eyes flutter shut

obsetress: cut to: them making out in the bathroom

obsetress: no um

obsetress: thinking about vi and dani's first kiss and like

obsetress: maybe like right after that up there vi's leaning in closer and i think she. asks dani "can i kiss you?" and dani's whispering "please" and then they're kissing all soft and THEN cut to: them making out in the bathroom and one of them slamming back against the door and kissing hard

em: dani whispering please…

em: also the smash cut between um nervous anticipation and SLAMMING against a door is so funny to me

em: sums them up

obsetress: RIGHT

obsetress: it's so good i love them

obsetress: i cant decide like

obsetress: because i don't think vi would be so rough with dani at first as to shove her hard against a door and i DO think dani would be shoving her against the door and her tongue down her throat first chance she gets

obsetress: but i think vi prob flips them p quick

---

em: i am. creasing thinking abt dani having to rename all of violas contacts like STOP FUCKING UR EX

obsetress: STOP FUCKING UR EX lskfjakdlsfjsd even BETTER

obsetress: edit the tumblr post coward

em: obsetress: no um dani definitely calls the landline once and viola's like "HELLO?" and dani's like "hi?" and viola's so glad to hear her dumb voice but she's still like "dani, why are you..." and dani's like "well... i, uh... i... i was... and then i..."

obsetress: anyway they have phone sex on the landline

em: CRYIN

em: danis blocked all of vis numbers except the landline shes down Bad

obsetress: yeah,

obsetress: (dani still comes over after)

em: unstoppable force (danis thirst) meet immovable object (violas stubbornness)

obsetress: just imagining like

obsetress: i mean either after this or at literally any other time

obsetress: dani and viola laying side by side in vi's bed catching their breath immediately after and viola's just like

obsetress: "you have the libido of a teenage boy"

obsetress: and dani's head just flops to the side to look at her and she just GRINS

em: dani makes some quip abt um

em: danis like i read somewhere women don’t hit their sexual peak until their 40s or something and violas like (extremely tersely) i’m 35

obsetress: SCREECH

obsetress: dani "no, i... i know, i wasn't–– i was just––"

obsetress: viola can't stay pressed w her

em: dani tryna explain her way outta that one i’m

em: dani has never once seen violas drivers license nor ID

obsetress: "i was just... saying, because, you know, i mean... for me, i'm... you know, i'm only ever getting more..." (flush, head duck, grin up through her lashes) "you know. and i'm getting older, so i was just... thinking. for me, i mean. thinking for me"

em: dani; also i give WAY better head than a teenage boy

obsetress: viola biting her lip, grinning, melting because how could you not? and then dani kinda stops in her tracks and her brows pinch together and she tilts her head at viola "i'm... a lot better at going down on you than a teenage boy though, right? i think i am" (long pause) "i hope i am"

obsetress: anyway viola laughs and tugs dani over n on top of her "i wouldn't know" and dani does her lil nervous laugh and is like "yeah, you're right, i guess not" "but" and dani's face lights up and viola continues "i think you probably are. and you're definitely up there" and dani just GRINS

obsetress: her head is back between vi's legs not three minutes later

em: dani talks big game n then like immediately double checks for validation

em: it’s an important part of her character growth!!!

---

em: ok more ‘viola has been doing this lesbian thing for longer than jamie realises’ content but like

em: perhaps she has a whole lot of ear piercings that she just never wears

em: and then one day she’s like gosh gotta make sure these don’t heal over and jamies like

em: hey what the fuck

---

obsetress: um suddenly had a thought

obsetress: viola tattoos

em: oh

obsetress: yeah, like um

obsetress: vi wouldn't have heaps and they'd be hidden bc Propriety but

em: hidden tattoos my beloved

em: all tattoos my beloved

em: i mean defs has like. the date and coordinates of isabels birth somewhere

em: but um! hmm

em: haha violets

obsetress: THE ISABEL THING WAS THE FIRST THING I WAS GONNA SAY

obsetress: violets are very vi tho like

obsetress: shade plant yk

em: under the tit

obsetress: I WAS GONNA SAY UNDER THE TIT

obsetress: GET OUTTA MY HEAD

obsetress: ok it has to be canon then if we both thought it

em: it’s canon!!

em: hmm what else

em: i think viola and dani have belly button piercings but like they got them separately

obsetress: omg when did they each get theirs

em: hmmmmmm

em: i mean wild child rich heiress viola (untapped potential here won’t lie)

obsetress: wild child rich heiress viola/boarding school wild child dani au

em: oh my god

em: viola defs went to a boarding school and dani n her commiserate over it

em: viola gets it done while she’s in highschool

em: dani post eddie break up

em: like symbolically reclaiming herself deal

em: doing things for Her

obsetress: YES

obsetress: i was gonna say vi highschool dani college

em: YES

em: idk what tattoos dani would get but am thinking abt viola holding her hand while she’s getting a tattoo or piercing done bc she’s braver than ppl think but Also

obsetress: vi holding dani's hand and telling her how good a job she's doing

obsetress: dani kissing vi's tattoos

obsetress: super fascinated even though shes seen them a hundred times

em: danis like haha and what’s this one mean (plants a big old smooch)

---

obsetress: Shananigans402: dani putting on 4 inch heels and being so content that she's finally her girlfriend's height and then viola kisses her before putting on 6 inch heels with a smug little grin

obsetress: i––

em: oh my god shannon

obsetress: oh shes on one

obsetress: Shananigans402: dani starts keeping things on a high shelf in her place just so she can ask viola to reach up to get them down for her

obsetress: i was talking to shan abt the shelf thing

obsetress: and i played myself i think

obsetress: because now i literally cannot stop thinking

obsetress: dani putting the strap on the top shelf in her closet "baby 🥺 can you get it 🥺"

---

[em note: once again it is the time honored timezone tradition of either sending ur friend something really good or really fucked up b4 they go to sleep]

em: what about

em: jamie and dani laying in bed after brunch w violas excessive amount of ear jewellery and jamies like ‘those were cool. i want some’ and danis like ‘with ur tiny lil ears??’ and jamies like ‘well. yeah…’ and danis like well. if u wanna. i think one would be cute here (mwah) and here (mwah) or maybe here (mwah)

em: ticklish jamie. that is my lil idea

obsetress: im Soft

em: thankyou

em: em softsbians

em: what was ur lil idea

obsetress: oh

obsetress: not obsoftress

obsetress: but um

em: look i was really hoping i could make it hornier but alas sometimes the idea is soft

em: can’t force the horny

obsetress: i will do my job n delivery the horny for u i suppose

obsetress: it's a hard job but somebody's gotta do it!

em: it’s a thankless job!

obsetress: dani, sneaking up behind viola to wrap her arms around her waist and bury her face between her shoulder blades: baby 🥺 can you get the strap 🥺

obsetress: dani, laying on the bed, staring up at her, panting: baby 🥺 can you get the strap 🥺

obsetress: dani, pulling away mid-heated makeout, half naked, still grinding into vi even tho they're not kissing anymore without even realizing it: baby baby 🥺 can you get the strap 🥺

obsetress: dani, catching her breath after her first orgasm, letting her head flop to the side to look over at vi: baby 🥺 can you get the strap 🥺

em: insatiable dani clayton my beloved

obsetress: thank you i agree

obsetress: something about dani calling vi baby also........................

em: oh i love dani calling vi baby SO MUCH

em: fucked up that dani clayton is potentially just the right height to motorboat vi pretty much whenever

em: sappho may u plant ur self face first into the breast of ur tender gf or whatever

em: dani: haha i’m so short i can’t reach it. can u lift me

obsetress: vi sees thru all of dani's little tricks but entertains them anyway

obsetress: because she knows shes gonna get to rail her at the end of them

em: dani being a little shit is foreplay actually clayton

em:

#the dani jamie viola rebecca exes au #this one is so self indulgent sorry sghjfasfms #but also: not sorry? #i have ONE MORE and then the vibecca wedding and im So Excited to post that one #not just bc then ill be like. free ahsjfasf

[zuffer-weird-girl]

I'M LATE I KNOW OKAY I HAVENT BEEN ON MY BEST FOR THE PAST MONTH IM SORRY

Kai handsome man come back to ussssss 😫

Okay, first I gotta apologize for not being activated for a while due to personal problems. But little by little is getting better.

Second, Happy late (supposed) birthday my dear Overhaul amazing Kai Chisaki!

Not so pointless day

You blinked a bit when some rays of the sun rose invaded the room and hitted the slightest the bedsheets and on your face, indicating that it was finally time to get up.

You turned ever so slowly your face to see the man right behind you. Peaceful sleep on his handsome face, one thing that it was rarity due to his late work hours... a smile appeared on your lips at seing your lover so relaxed and you had to really control yourself to just not carress his handsome face or to even kiss him.

You already had plans today. And since you got Pops and most of the subbordinates of the Shie Hassaikai by your side on this idea, there was no way Kai would know about this! And you had to be extremely careful or your boyfriend would end up discovering everthing!... much like last time.

You shifted a bit to ever so slowly left the bed sheets for you to slide your legs out of the bed on the cold floor... but just when you were about to lift up, you had noticed that Kai was with one arm wrapped around your midsection.

Great. Just on the day you just couldn't be on the bed cuddling with him and just couldn't wake him up, he HAD to have a grip on you. Perfect. Just GREAT.

Cursing under your breath you slowly lifted his muscled arm up enough for you to slide on the bed and gently place it back down. You tip toed, still with looking at Kai, and just when you had reached the door of the bathroom you made the mistake of sigh in relief.

"I know what you're pretending to." His low and full of sleep voice manifested from the bed and you immediately cringed.

Curse his light sleep.

"H-Hey!!!" You smiled sheepish even seing that he didn't open his eyes still "Morning hands-"

"Get back on bed. Is early as shit and I don't have work." He mumbled with a hand on his face, groaning when he opened his eyes a bit only to close then again due to the sun light.

You giggled at his words, knowing that only when Kai was tired that he didn't care to let out one or two curse words.

"I would love to, but I've got plans and-"

"Yeah and you're not doing it." He said nonchantly, sending one eyed glare at your direction "Once again, I knwo what you're planning, and that's not happening."

"Wha? What are you talking about?" You felt a drop of cold sweat on the back of your neck, yet you did your best to hide your nervousness from Chisaki.

"Don't play dumb now (Y/n). You and I nnwo what day it is. And you're not doing shit." He growled while getting up on his elbows to fully stare at you from the bed.

"I didn't plan anything!" You lied, lifting your hands up in false defense as he arched one eyebrow at you, clearly not believing your words.

"Of course. Then you wouldn't mind to get back on the bed now?"

"Actually..." you poked your fingers together as you looked everywhere but his amber eyes "I-I.. I promised that I would help Pops on the garden!"

"What?" He arched his eyebrow even more, standing from his bed "No you didn't-"

"Yesterday! I-I promised him this and I couldn't just-" you forced a laugh when he got up and crossed his arms while staring you down, getting just a bit distracted at the show of his muscles "Deny it, right?"

"You're the worst liar I ever laid my eyes on (Y/n)." He nonchalantly spoke as you cringed even more before dead panning.

"Wait, is that a compliment or-" he interrupted you with kiss, shutting you up pretty quickly. His hands travelled down to your waist as he bitted lightly on your bottom lip to allow you to give him a entrance.

You sighed and moaned a bit at his touch and the kiss before he broke apart only to trail hot fervent kisses on your neck to stop right by your ear lobe to whisper huskily.

"I guess that maybe if you want to surprise me on this pointless day, then at least I got to choose what I want." He nibbled a bit on your ear lobe "Dont you agree my angel?"

Just when you were getting on his trap, a knock on the door made him grunt and you pout a bit.

"Master? Pardon me but we have to get out to solve a few things."

"Nemoto..." he growled in your neck and you remembered your plan on a flash, giving your best to not smile in yeargness.

Kai started to glare at the door and straightened his back up "I have sure that it was talked that this day I had a break." He said in annoyance, still holding you close to him.

"I do know of that master, and excuse me for this. But it is something important that can't just be waited." He rolled his eyes at that before looking at you, mentally either cursing poor Nemoto or apologizing to you.

"Go." You smiled warmingly at him before pecking his lips "We can continue this later when you come back." You whispered lovingly at him and mentally yelped in glee at the half smile he gave to you in a minor of seconds before he returned to his serious expression, telling Nemoto to give him a minute.

"Luckily it won't take much time." He muttered while picking his white tie and putting around his neck "Don't mess neither burn the house down while I'm out."

You scoffed playfully while getting up to tie his tie for him, smirking at the serious look he gave to you but knowing how he secretly loved the action.

"Right mister future leader of the yakusa." He growled while rolling his eyes, getting out and grabbing his jacket.

"I will see you in some hours." He said, subsconciously waiting for the three words he never had courage to say to you but secretely craved to hear it.

"Right! Bye!" You waved cutely at him, giggling at his deadpan look and a hint of dissapointment of not hearing an 'I love you'.

Just when Kai got out he nodded at nemoto who greeted him. Sneakily you poked your head out and smiled wide at Nemoto.

"Thank you so much!"

"Is not a problem (Y/n) sama." He bowed a bit "Which hour we have to get back again if you dont mind me asking?"

"I will send you a message or Rappa. Think only you both can take care of distracting him enough?"

"Rappa is an expert. He just doesn't have to die. While I have my methods." He smirked before waving at you politely when he got called out again as you got out of your room with a determined look.

"Is now or never!" You said to yourself just when Kai left the house. Chuckling while making your way to start the whole thing you had planned ever since the start of this month.

~

"And here I thought that you were joking when you wanted everthing perfect." Kurono muttered while double checking for any dirty on the halls as you got a message for a friend of yours that the cake you ordered was coming and was just to pick outside.

"We're talking about Kai here." You giggled as Hari was quiet for a minute before nodding with a 'fair enough'.

"GeT thE FuCk OuT Of My WaY ClEaNInG ThE FlOOr Is-"

"STOP YELLING AND JUST CLEAN IRINAKA!" Hojo shouted after Joi as he dried the floor right before him.

"I have to admit that I am surprised to see that you got everyone on the Hassaikai to collaborate." Kurono muttered as you both got out and you thanked the delivery man while picking up the box with a huff before thanking Hari for offering to carry it instead.

"I talked with you and Pops first."

"... That explains a lot." He peeked inside the box and whistled "Kai is going to freak out on all of this. You know more than I do that he hates surprises."

"But this one is a good surprise!" You whined while opening the door "How could he hate it?"

"Because it involves his birthday (Y/n)." He said suddenly on a serious tone as be walked along sides you to place the neatly cherry and vanilla cake on the center of the table.

"You do know already he doesn't give a shit neither celebrate it. Heck, it took him even begging Pops once to not celebrate his birthday when he made 16."

"I know." You sighed and looked at the clock "But at least one good memory I want to give it to him when this day comes. Is not fair that on my birthday he buys almost a whole market and on his birthday he says something like 'I just was born'; 'Nothing special happened on this day' or the worst: 'Why celebrate something that is not valid?'" The white haired man couldn't help but chuckle at your imitation of Kai before apologizing at seing your serious face.

"Well, he is not much of someone who celebrate those things."

"He can't complaint it if it isn't something giant!" You exclaimed just when Pops entered and chuckled at your dramatic action.

"I am relieved that my boy got someone like you to take care of him like that (Y/n)." The elder chuckled while you put your arms down with a blush on your face as the asshole in your side snorted.

"So?" He looked around with a serene smile "This was the start of your present for Chisaki. There is more?"

"I actually have two presents for him." You smiled before looking at Kurono "Did you and irinaka were the only ones that got him something asides from me and Pops Kurono-kun?"

"Negative." The man took out one hand of his white hoddie and pointed with his thumb outside "All the eight precepts got him something asides from Rappa."

"Why I am not surprised at this?" You sighed and both men chuckled at your action before Pops grabbed gently on your shoulder.

"Come (Y/n). I want to show you something." You made a surprised sound before Kurono nodded and told you he was going to take care of things while Pops dragged you to his own office.

"Have to say (Y/n), you're a blessing on our lifes." The elder sighed as he made his way to his desk as you looked around in awe.

"Oh! Is nothing!" You smiled at the elder "Kai always say how he doesn't particularly care, but I cam see the bit of... happines when I at least wish him a happy birthday... I guess." You looked at the ground witha shy smile before jerking your head up at hearing the elder footsteps and standing right in front of you with a smile with a coal black box on his hands.

"Seems like you know more of my Chisaki than I do." He opened the box and you widened your eyes with a gasp at seing the jewelry inside.

It was a pair of pigments with the symbols of the ying and yang separated. Both shined at the light of the room and you looked up at Pops with confusion.

"This belonged to me and my wife a long time ago." He looked up at you with a smile "You remind me of her sometimes kid."

He picked up the ying symbol while leaving the box on a table as he put the necklace on you.

"Despite us being japanese. She loved the concept of it, and I bought it. I never actually came to talk about her to Chisaki so I would like this to remain as a secret between us." You nodded a bit hesitantly before he smirked at the sign of you with the neck lace as he grabbed the box.

"The ying yang means two halves which come together to complete wholeness, both the sides are dependent on each other. And as I can tell by looking at you and my... son, you both belong-" he grabbed the yang symbol and hold your necklace, with a 'click', the two pieces were stuck together.

"Together." He showed you before splitting them apart and bringing your hand to his older one to close around the other necklace "Give this to Kai, I have other present for him."

You couldn't even mutter one word of gratitude or any for that matter before your phone buzzed up and you excused yourself to answer it.

~

"Please tell us we can go back." The man spoked as he watched Rappa dodging another attack of Chisaki on a abandoned alley "The situation here is critic. What happened? Well.." Nemoto took his cellphone out of his ear to make Chisaki's companion to hear the whole mess.

"THEY WERENT EVEN DEALERS YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE CLEAN FREAK!"

"Have on your mind that your movements Rappa are EASY TO PREDICT" In one second the man was overhauled and Nemoto hissed at that before bringing his phone close again.

"Sure we can go? Right, thanks (Y/n) sama."

"What about (Y/n)?" Chisaki muttered darkly while sending a cold glare at Nemoto who flinched a bit.

"Fuck."

~

"SOMEONE HOLD THIS FUCKER!" Kurono shouted as Hojo and Setsuno had a firm grip on each of Tabe's arms while Irinaka on his tiny form gripped the man's hair, as Tabe himself said the word 'EAT' franquily while trying to reach at the table.

You and Pops had just gotten back and the elder scowled at the attitude of his workers, like they were some kids.

"Enough is enough!" The elder shouted and everyone grew quiet and lowered their heads "How many years any of you have now? 2 to five now?! Due to your current attitude and behaviour I wouldn't be surprised." The elder crossed his arms as everyone on the room looked down in ashame.

You furrowed your eyebrows a bit before an idea popped out. You eargly went to table full of goods and put a good amount to every precept of each of the things you had ordered except the cake.

"Here! You guys can have those while Kai is not back yet!" You offered each one their pieces and giggled when Tabe just swallowed the whole thing... plastic plate and all.

"You're too good for the mafia (Y/n)." Setsuno chuckled as Hojo nodded with a smirk.

"Right right, every one of you out before Chisaki appear eh?" Irinaka slapped his hands when he returned to his normal form as you gave him a quizzical look before he got down to whisper in your ear "I'm sure the boss won't have it many people here despite all that bullshit."

You pouted and still promised everyone that got out to give them a piece of the cake.

"So?" Kurono came by your side "When the man of the party is coming?"

"By any min-" you flinched as Kurono and mimic grabbed their guns when they heard the door being slammed as some shouts were heard.

"I SWEAR TO FUCKING ALL MIGHT HAVE A CHILL YOU FUCKING SOCIOPATH! YOU ALREADY KILLED ME ONCE TODAY!"

"Repeat a hero's name on my house again. Go on. I dare you." You gulped at hearing Kai's tone of voice, full of wrath and disgust as some parts of the wall were overhauled.

Rappa stormed in the room along with Nemoto as they closed the door with a sigh... not caring about the looks they were receiving.

"Package delivered. I want my fifth bucks." Kendo extended his muscular hand to Irinaka who grumbled a bit and handed him the money.

"Is he..?" Kurono pointed at the door as Nemoto glared at Rappa.

"Furious thanks to someone here who decided to comment on (Y/n) sama again."

"YOU WERE THE ONE WHO STARTED-"

"That's it." The elder commented harshly, again silencing the room "Both are dismissed for now, you guys can come back later if you want anything to eat."

"I would let Rappa to starve boss." Mimic commented as Kurono hummed in agreement, ignoring Rappa's swear words.

You tip toed out of the room the moment the two men left the door, leaving them discussing with each other as you searched for Chisaki.

"Kai?" You called out and the said man appeared with a tired and angry expression. You smiled in sympathy while tilting your head as he aproached you "Rough day?"

"Only a nickname compared to what I had to atture." He growled before slidding his gloved hands through his dark brow looks. "Where the hell is those two-"

"Wait wait wait!" You stepped on his front with your hands on his chest "Can I show you something first?" He arched his eyebrow at you, bit still sighed and with a motion of his hand told you to proceed.

"You have to close your eyes." He deadpanned at that before his face scrunched up in realization.

"I swear to god." He muttered with a hand pinching between his eyebrows.

"Please???"

"I lost count of how many times I told you to not do anything!" He spatted while looking at you with a bit of dissapointment and anger.

"Please my capoo?" You put on your puppy eyes and hold your hands together as he glared down at you.

"I despise you." He sighed before closing his eyes, growling when he heard your yelp of glee and sensing you getting behind him.

"Can I touch you?"

"Washed your hands?" He sighed a d cringed a bit when the soft skin of your hands and arms brushed over his shoulders and part of his face not covered with a mask. "If you run me into a wall I swear that I will consider on overhauling you."

"Sure sure!" You giggled and tip toed due to his height to keep your hands close to his eyes and opened with your foot the door before whispering a 'there' on his ear.

He opened his amber eyes and arched a eyebrow at seing the sweet in front of him before he looked at you in suspense and the whole room. "How many years do you think I have?" He asked nonchantly but you rolled your eyes at him.

"No one is 'old enough' to have a little celebration on your birthday!"

"Is a pointless-"

"Not for me." You said in a serious tone and he seemed surprised at that, but his face stayed monotonous "Kai I love you more than anything! Is not a pointless day if a bunch of people care for you." You pointed at a pile of boxes and he arched one eyebrow at that "Those were some gifts that the eight precepts brough."

"Out of order I suppose."

"Geez dude accept already." Kurono said with a smirk before elbowing Kai on the arm, Chisaki immediately screeching at the area with a glare at his childhood friend, muttering a 'dont touch me'. "(Y/n) had all this work for you man." Irinaka muttered while munching on a snack.

Kai's glare turned into a soft gaze as he looked at you. Hesitation still on him, he grabbed one bottle of sake close to him, inspected a bit before popping it out. Scoffing at the cheers that his old man, companions and partner did at catching that he had accept it.

"Is your favorite flavor of cake my capoo!" You pointed at the cake, not seing his fond smile due to his black mask before he punched Irinaka and kurono for laughing at the nickname you gave it to him as the Pops shook his head with a laugh. Kai was at least a bit eased back for real to yours surprise! You could notice that despite his monotonous face, a little bit of happiness was still on his golden eyes that you loved so much.

"So?" You chirped on his side as he poked his generous piece of cake, mask down to his chin only to eat "Whatcha think??"

He only arched one eyebrow at you before doing something you never expected. He poked your nose with the uttensile he was using, you gasped at the action with the residues of cake on your nose before he smirked devilish at you, throwing the utensils away and catching you off guard by handing you a handkerchief and kissing your temple while no one was looking.

"Not so pointless. Happy now brat?" He muttered before getting to grab another uttensiles as you tried to understand what had just happened.

Bonus!

"How thoughtful and cliche no less." He inspected the yang necklace, you were a bit insecure before smilling widely at seing him putting the necklace around his perfect neck.

"That's not the whole thing!" You chirped before jumping out of the bed and going to the bathroom. He arched one eyebrow before widening his eyes at the clothing you were using. Showing all the parts of your body he loved the most...

"Do what you must do my capoo~" you cooed before crawling your way to his lap "Your final gift my love".

"And the only one I wanted to unwrap." He growled before twirling both of you around so he could be on top "Finally my truly desert." He growled close to your ear before... you know. Long night for the both of you ;)

#overhaul x reader #overhaul chisaki kai #overhaul imagine #overhaul scenario #overhaul #chisaki kai x reader #kai chisaki #chisaki kai scenarios #chisaki kai #bnha villains x reader #bnha #my writing #zuffer writings

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

[trigger warning: CSA and STD's] Hey I'd like advice on this situation if you have any but mostly I just want validation/someone to listen. I was sexually abused by my older brother when I was a young child and I never told anyone, and I recently found out he has genital herpes (and had it when he abused me.) So I've been trying to figure out what the fuck to do about that. Most health websites say not to bother getting tested for herpes if you don't have symptoms because it doesn't really matter, and I'm terrified of doctors so I really don't want to get tested. But I keep worrying that I might have it and that I'll transmit it to someone someday (I'm a lesbian and I don't think I'd ever want to have anyone touch me in that area, but I'm worried someday I'll change my mind and have to explain all this to a partner? Or that I'll somehow transmit it anyway? Idk). I thought I was coping with the trauma really well before this news but now I feel disgusting and every time anyone mentions STD's/sexual health I need to go lay in bed for a few hours and cry. I don't really have any support system right now and I live with my family who doesn't know any of this happened. On top of that, the brother that abused me still stops by to visit every once in a while. So yeah. Thank you for listening to me

Your feelings are valid, and it's normal to feel disgusting after being assaulted, even though it doesn't actually make you disgusting. I'm sorry you don't have any support system, and that you have to stay with your family who is unaware of the abuse, and that you have to see your abuser when he stops by. That sounds so difficult to deal with.

You may or may not have genital herpes. If it would make you feel better to know one way or another, you can ask a doctor for the testing. The reason why they discourage testing is that the blood test isn't especially reliable and will give you a positive if you have cold sores. Because of the stigma, people who get a positive result are often extremely distressed about it, and if it turns out they only have cold sores and not genital herpes, it causes a lot of unnecessary distress/harm. But ultimately, it is your choice, and you have every right to request testing if it would make you feel better. But if you do not want to be tested because you're afraid of doctors, or because you don't want to risk a false positive causing emotional distress, that is 100% valid and you do not need to go get tested.

If you do get an outbreak/visible symptoms, you may want to get them swabbed (you can ask the doctor if you can swab the suspected sore yourself if you do not want the doctor to touch you). A swab is the most accurate way to get a diagnosis, and will give you a clearer answer than a blood test, so it's okay to wait for that. Also, if you get symptoms/an outbreak, there is medication for it that will treat the symptoms as well as decrease the likelihood of spreading that you can discuss with a doctor at that point. Again, seeking medical attention for that is not required if you're not comfortable with that.

It is important to be open and honest with any new intimate partners as herpes is transmitted by skin-to-skin contact and not just by direct intercourse (so while skin-on-skin cuddling is pretty low-risk, it is not risk-free). But you do not need to actually get tested in order to have honest conversations about sexual history/sexual health. It's okay to tell a partner "I may have been exposed to genital herpes due to childhood abuse, but have not had laboratory confirmation, and have not had an outbreak before/my last outbreak was X years ago". The conversation might be awkward to have the first time, but it's not the end of the world. During the conversation, you may be surprised to even find out that your partner already has it (it's very common!).

There is a lot of stigma attached to genital herpes, and I'm sorry. It might help to look at herpes-positivity resources even though you don't know if you have it, in order to better cope with the possibility/idea of having it. Most people who have herpes continue to live normal lives. While there is a lot of stigma, most people with herpes do manage to find love if they want it. Antiviral medication like acyclovir or valacyclovir can reduce the risk of transmission, and many people in long-term relationships decide their love for the other person outweighs the risk of infection and are willing to accept the possibility they might catch it (especially if primarily engaging in lower-risk activities).

This resource is primarily for people who have been diagnosed with herpes already, but may be helpful to you: https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/stds-hiv-safer-sex/herpes/living-with-herpes

- Mod Allison

#trauma talks #tw csa #mod allison #tw medical

[mammon-sama]

Can I get some Mammon fluff? Like he or MC are upset about something and they come to one another for cuddles? I think that's cute.... Plus I'm in need of a hug 🤗

Sorry, anon this took so long!!!  Mammon was being a butthead throughout this whole fic and was not cooperating!  And this is not exactly cuddling, but I hope it suffices!  AND OMG ANON YOU SHALL BE HUGGED  🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗 Also, as usual, this story can be read on AO3 here.  Additionally, I have a few more writing requests to do, but feel free to send more if you’d like!

Title:

Avatar of Greed

Summary:

Mammon barges into your room very upset. You may not have all the answers, but you sure know when someone is in need of a hug and a listening ear.

Genre:

Angst/Comfort/Fluff

Rating:

G

Word Count:

1606

-

You tap your fingers on your desk and stare daggers at your Poison Lore 1001 homework.  Your assignment is to create an extremely volatile aphrodisiac using belladonna, hemlock, and another toxic, yet arcane plant native to the Devildom—which is what stumps you, because as a human, how are you supposed to know what toxic plants are native to the Devildom!?  

You growl in frustration.  You aren’t supposed to use the internet to acquaint yourself with said plant and you can’t find your library card in order to check out a book at the Royal Library to find out what it might be.

Resting your head on your desk, you sigh.  Before you can decide that the assignment is a lost cause, you hear your bedroom door swing open.  Someone stomps in and sighs dramatically; you can hear them flop onto your bed. You already know who it is before they say a word.

“Mammon,” you groan, not raising your head.  “What did I say about sitting on my bed?”

“‘None of the members of the House of Lamentation are allowed on MC’s bed,’” he recites.  He pauses and then amends, “‘Cept for the Great Mammon, ‘cause he was MC’s first.”  

You moan and turn behind you, where you see Mammon lying all starfish-like on your bed.  “I don’t remember adding the last part.” You walk over and poke him. “Get off.”

“No,” Mammon whines, slinking further into the sheets. “MC, ya gotta let me stay.” 

Again, you poke him.  “Why?”

He sighs.  “Just do it, okay?”

Surprised with his answer, you finally decide your homework is most definitely not going to get done and scoot onto the bed with him, sitting on your pillows with Mammon sprawled out in front of you.  Absentmindedly, you fiddle with his hair, not noticing the blush that spreads across his face as you do so.  

“St—sto—”  he sputters incoherently for a few moments, before closing his eyes and retreating to silence.  The two of you sit like that quietly for a spell, before he breaks it again. “MC,” he begins, his voice so faint that you barely can hear it, “d’ya think I’m annoyin’?”

You don’t miss a beat as you continue playing with his hair and answer, “Yes.”

“Whaddaya mean by that, huh?” he demands, his blush growing even deeper and his eyes flying open.  “Didn’t ya hear what I asked? I asked if ya thought I was annoyin’!”  

“I know; I said ‘yes.’”  He doesn’t see the tiny smirk that forms at the corner of your mouth.

Mammon fidgets, his face tomato red now.  “K—keep talkin’ like that MC, and I might actually believe ya!”  He pauses again, and sits up, turning behind to look at you. He looks down and his voice turns into a whisper.  “… Do you really think that, though?”

You look at him, raising your eyebrows.  Before he had looked down, you had seen something in his dark blue eyes—something you hadn’t noticed before.  

You had always noticed the pools of a desire for validation that rippled in his dark sapphire irises, but today—today, you saw thin streams of desperation swirling amongst them, as well.  You decide that the time for teasing the tsundere, tsundere demon is over. You pull him back down, letting his head rest on your lap and scoop a pillow off your bed.

“Wh—whoa, MC!” he exclaims.   You didn’t think his face could get any redder, but somehow it does.  “I know you’re desperate for The Mammon, but ya didn’t even answer my que—”

Before the fool can finish his sentence, you whomp your pillow across his head.  You blush, grit your teeth, and answer his initial question, saying, “If I found you annoying, I wouldn’t sit here and listen to you babble, would I?”  

Mammon coughs in embarrassment and wisely avoids eye contact—a fact which you are very grateful for, because what would you do if he saw how red your face was now?

You try to regain your composure.  You clear your throat and wonder, “Why do you ask?”  You ponder if one of his brothers had said something to him for him to ask such a question, but then you remember Mammon’s neverending patience when it came to the verbal lashings that his brothers magnanimously granted to him. 

“It’s nothin’.”

You remember the desperation you had seen in his eyes and in your most wheedlesome tone, cajole “Come on, say.”

“I told ya, it’s nothin’ for you to worry about, MC.”

“Please say.”  You take a deep breath and muster your sweetest voice.  “For  me?“

“AAAH!” he grumbles, nestling his head deeper into your lap.  “MC, you know damn well that I can’t say no when ya use that voice!”

You smile in satisfaction and amuse your fingers in his hair once more.  “I’ll take that as a yes.”

Mammon turns to his side so you can no longer see his face and sighs.  “Fine.” He takes a deep breath. “MC, what sin am I the Avatar of?”

“Stupidity.”  The tease pops out of your mouth without your consent.  

“HEY!  Stupidity’s not a sin and you know it!”  

You stifle a laugh as you notice that he doesn’t deny his idiocy and try to remain serious.  “Alright, alright. I know you’re the Avatar of Greed.”

“Mm-hm,” he agrees.  “And ya know what? I’m damn good at what I do.”  Mammon’s confident tone falters for a moment. “Sure, I’m klepto as hell, but it’s not like I can help that … y’know?”  He pauses. “I’m greedy—it’s who I am. When I see somethin’ I like, I gotta have it, no matter what.” You don’t notice that he lightly coils his fingers around your calf as he says this.  

Saying nothing, you nod at his spiel.  You know the secondborn demon well enough to realize that he has more to say.  

And he does.  His voice lowers to a whisper and he wonders, “Then why am I always gettin’ blamed for bein’ who I am, huh?”  You can feel his head shake in your lap. “Sure, I guess me lootin’ stuff isn’t fun for everyone, but it’s not like I can help it—it’s instinct.”

You’re not sure how to answer his question, so you continue your silence and let him talk.  

“But hey, doesn’t everyone notice that it also ain’t fun for all of us to have to explain to the whole class why Belphie’s sleepin’ during lecture again or to open the fridge and realize Beel’s eaten damn near everything?  Or hey, do they think it’s easier to have Asmo hittin’ on everything with a pulse?  Maybe it’s better for Satan to blow up the House in some kinda tantrum or to have Levi freak the fuck out ‘cause some rando on the internet has a Ruri-chan figure that he doesn’t?  Or to know that Lucifer—” his voice breaks, but he swallows quickly and continues, “—to know that Lucifer’s so fuckin’  perfect that I can’t think of any flaws for him?”

Even though you vowed not to interrupt him, you decide it’s best to cut him off there.  “Lucifer’s not perfect.”

“Trust me—” Mammon’s voice breaks again as he turns his head deeper into your lap.  “—trust me, MC, I know that! Ignore ‘im for a minute here.” He sighs and pivots so that he faces the ceiling, and you can see that his eyes are ever-so-slightly glassy.  “Just … why’s that okay, huh? Why’s everything all hunky-dory for them when they’re givin’ into their sin, but all pitchforks ‘n’ torches for Mammon?”

You pull your hands out of his hair and bring them around his shoulders.  For once, he’s too distraught to blush. You’re not sure why his brothers act the way they do, but you are sure of the response he needs.  “It’s not fair.”

“No,” he mutters, “it ain’t.  And it’s not like it bothers me a lot, but sometimes … when I get to thinkin’ … ”

That’s when you realize that the desperation you had seen earlier in his eyes wasn’t just his desperation to be validated, but desperation for someone to just listen to what he was saying.  

You’d seen how the other six demons reacted when Mammon spoke—they’d tromp over him (although … could you really blame them?  Mammon’s dialogue usually made it clear that he was merely operating on one brain cell). Perhaps it was in an effort to tease, but even then there was only so much a demon can suffer.  You’re even more thankful now that you had let him monologue for so long. If anyone deserved to, it was the silly secondborn. 

You don’t even have to think as you yank him into a seated position and wrap your arms around his back tightly; you don’t let go as you slowly rub circles into his back.  Graciously, you decide to do him a favor and not make the adorable little squeak! he elicited as you did so public knowledge.

“H—hey, MC!  Ya don’t have to feel sorry for me or anythin’!”  He blushes, having regained some of his cockiness.  “I’m a demon for cryin’ out loud!  I don’t need a hug!”  Nevertheless, he takes a deep breath and leans into you.   

Your head is nuzzled into his hair as you murmur, “Shh … everyone needs a hug, sometimes.”

You feel his body stiffen and you worry that that was the wrong thing to say.  However, Mammon turns around and wraps his arms around you, just as tightly.  

You breathe warmly into him and stifle a laugh when he meekly asks, “Y—you’re not gonna do this for my brothers, right?”

“Never.”

#obey me #obey me swd #obey me shall we date #obey me swd mammon #obey me shall we date mammon #obey me oc #obey me mc #fanfiction #fanfic #angst with a happy ending #fluff #adverbslut_writes

[well-shit-im-a-morosexual-now]

There's a new lesson that I can't get to, so I'm going to you!

-35 Anon

Ahhhh??? I absolutely loved this lesson? It's a mostly mammon focused lesson (thanks to all the other brothers nearly dying) with angel backstory/hierarchy added in!????? I'm bouncing off the walls

LESSON 43 SPOILERS

It starts the next day after Solomon nearly kills MC with Mammon waking up looking for breakfast while complaining about the sun (fair enough) he gets annoyed when no one else is up, breakfast is not made and MC is the only one he finds. MC (with what I can only presume is a ridiculous eyebrow wiggle) says 'guess it's just you and me huh?....all alone....' Mammon blushes and says 'that literally cannot be the first thing I hear from you in the morning you're gonna give me a boner' (he actually says something like 'yeah...but don't say sweet, romantic stuff to me first thing in the morning cause you're gonna get me excited')

Mammon complains about the others sleeping in late and says he's gonna not so gently wake them up (this shit validates my HC that Mammon's an early bird and I dunno it just makes me happy) Mammon, with MC trailing behind him, goes to find his brothers. Lucifer is still asleep in his room, Mammon says this is probably a sign pointing to the beginning of the end, Lucifer says 'actually I'm dying cause the scent and flavour of Solomon's food bubbled up in the middle of the night so I'm going the fuck to sleep good night'. Satan wonders what exactly Solomon's food is cause it was able to not have an effect for hours and then suddenly come up again to kill them - he then passes out. Belphie is by Beel's bedside screaming at him to not go into the light, Mammon wonders if maybe Beel's just dying of hunger and Beel says there's no way in hell he's gonna eat anything and Mammon calls Beel out on being an imposter, Beel collapses on the bed and Belpie laments the fact that Beel's dying and that there's nothing he can do. Mammon says 'ugh bro you look like ya gonna die too' and Belphie says 'yeah well i feel like I'm gonna die ever since i ate some custard as a midnight snack and actually maybe it wasn't custard...maybe it was some weird as dessert solomon made cool cool cool i'm gonna pass out too'. Beel says 'Me too' and mammon wonders about the power behind Solomon's cooking. Levi I'm assuming is dead cause no matter how much Mammon pounded on his door and asked him to say something there was no reply so RIP. Asmo blames Mammon for getting sick, cause the bottled water Mammon brought for Asmo when he asked for it the previous night was probably some weird concoction Solomon made. Apparently Asmo's been hearing things ever since he drank it. He also despairs not being able to go the cafe with MC before collapsing on his bed. Mammon considers the fact that Solomon's food should probably be classified as a lethal weapon. Later in the corridor Mammon says that it seems like MC and Mammon are the only ones who came outta this unharmed but like MC nearly died the previous night so what the fuck is your stomach made out of Mammon!? When MC asks this he says he has no fucking clue either but it looks like their entire fridge is now a nuclear waste dump and that they should probably go get some food and medicine (you know these idiots are never gonna return and the others are gonna die).

They go to the Angel's Halo but it's still closed and they decide to come back later, MC ever the opportunist says 'hey ik your brothers are like dying rn and that sucks but ugh wanna make this a date?' And Mammon who has to live with 6 others who are in love with the same person as him and are constant cockblocks says 'shit yeah them being on death's door will probably be the only time we can spend time together without the others breathing down our necks, guess we gotta actually thank -the devs and their massive soft spot for Mammon- Solomon'. Mammon tells MC stories about the other times the brothers were sick, smiling about how they always take things to the extreme (levi had a slight fever and freaked out and turned Henry into Lotan, Asmo had a cold and all his fans came to the house to take care of him and it turned into a party). He says since they are in the human world now they wouldn't have to worry about anything too crazy...then he ruins it by basically saying 'probably'. They go to buy medicine with Lucifer's credit card. MC can ask him how he got it and he'll say it's fine cause they'll just buy food and medicine and only a few things for himself. Or MC can say 'yeah but would medicine actually help?' and Mammon will say 'good point considering it's Solomon's food but we might as well throw some pepto bismol at it and hope for the best.' While heading to the market, Mammon starts blushing about how MC and him heading to the market to buy groceries for dinner sorta feels like something newlyweds would do and hwuidhqowsho8ef7ydjb I'M SCREECHING!? Look me in the eye and tell me this man doesn't have a whole ass colour coded wedding planner aihdhwgdxugz he probably started making it a week after meeting MC. So they head to the market and I shit you not I screamed cause the butcher WHO FUCKING GAVE ADVICE TO MC & BEEL ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP calls out to MC. LOOK I joked about this happening last time but I didn't actually think it would???? and not this fast either! I thought i was gonna have to write a fic about this poor Butcher but solmare's really just giving it to me for free huh? When the butcher greets MC Mammon asks if he knows them and the butcher says that they stopped by the previous day (and look this part is kinda silly and self indulgent but some random as butcher just casually using they/them pronouns made me so happy???). The butcher then asks what the occasion is and if MC is inviting their friend to a party.  Mammon, sweet beautiful Mammon goes word for word "Friend? Me? Nah, nah, I ain't just a friend.   The two of us LIVE together." Bro at this point I'm in actual tears just imagining this whole scenario. the butcher stutters out an "Ah, I...I see..." MC has a horrid flashback to the previous day of the butcher happily giving them relationship advice for Beel. The Butcher and MC just silently stare at each other for a sec before MC goes "um so yeah ik that happened yesterday but see this one is the one I'm actually serious about." Mammon goes "hey!? wtf who's the OTHER one!?" Then to the poor butcher says "listen up, Me & MC are a THING, got it? so yeah MC's gonna show up with not one, not two but with six other hot guys at some point who are all gonna act like they're a couple BUT it doesn't mean anything  got it!? Specially if 'it's a real evil, sinister-lookin' dude with a huge ego and a heart as black as night' that guy especially doesn't mean shit to MC". The butcher says "o-okay". Anyway I desperately need this to be a running gag. Mammon later in really happy that the butcher thought they were a couple and living together and then Mammon who I'm 100% certain at this point has his and MC's entire lives together planned out starts blushing and sighing and saying how he really wishes it was just the two of them living together, sleeping in the same room (bruh I think it's implied enough to assume you already do this half the time), spending the whole day together and staying by each other's sides and how just the thought of all that is nice enough that he can't fight a smile. MC's stomach, much to mammon's dismay, ruins his daydreams by reminding everyone that they haven't had breakfast yet. They decide rather than waiting for the cafe to open to go get something to eat.

They decide to stop at a deli with a line of customers and I think I said this in my answer to your previous ask but I kinda just assumed Mammon would be the most comfortable in the human world and how it was kinda shown when they went to get pizza and later Asmo's dessert that he was able to act the most normal and actually noted when the others were acting weird and tried to reign them in. And that it was probably cause of how much he went to the human world for the witches and MC actually brings it up! They can either say that he seems pretty at home in the human world and he says something like 'oh? I'm just acting like I normally would' or they can ask him if he eats at delis a lot and he says that whenever he gets hungry while he's in the human world for the witches he'll stop at a deli cause it's easy. He kinda gets a sad look while talking about the witches and for once MC gets to turn the tables and be the jealous one. They can ask him if he has pacts with anyone besides them and he says 'no obviously not, do you think I went around making pacts with random people' ....except MC was a random person when he made a pact with them and I've always thought Mammon started getting a crush after making a pact but do you think he was kinda subconsciously curious even prior to it despite how much he tried to get rid of them? MC can also say "witches, huh...?" And mammon goes 'jyggfsdyugadsyu wait are you actually jealous!?" he then leughs, calls MC a dummy and asks how they could be jealous of the witches. AND!! this part made me so happy cause they only mentioned it once before in the main storyline but it was important enough that they had a whole backstory UR card for it and I was wondering if they'd bring it up now since they were in the human world - mammon gets all sad and says there's a reason he can't refuse the witches. he kinda hesitates around telling them that he borrowed some money, and they took over some of his debts and "...And some other stuff, too" (Me, banging my fists on the table: SHOW ME HIS CHILD SOLMARE! PLS! LET MC HAVE A DAUGHTER! or at least give me a name) MC asks if Lucifer knows about this, Mammon says he probably does cause lucifer's his big brother and you can't keep any secrets from your big brother. then he sighs and says he wishes he could live in the human world forever cause he wouldn't have to listen to lucifer's lectures anymore. He seems to realise what exactly he implied cause he goes silent and starts blushing and starts stuttering through saying that what he actually means is that if MC really wants him to stay with them then he might be willing to. They're interrupted by customers talking about a rumour that drinking coffee from the new cafe would make the person you have a crush on fall madly in love with you so obviously Mammon says fuck the deli and drags MC away to the cafe. MC sighs about Mammon being really easy to read. Mammon seems to finally remember that he's supposed to be a tsundere and says him suddenly wanting coffee has nothing to do with the rumour so don't you dare think that and it's not like he's gonna chug their coffee just so MC would fall madly in love with him. MC quite literally goes 'no you' and says well sure you won't chug the coffee but i will and then you'll fall madly in love with me. Mammon, blushing and stuttering, says 'okay but you gotta warn me before saying stuff like that cause it could literally kill me also wtf 'I'm sorta ALREADY madly in love with you...' if you make me fall any harder we're both screwed." He then walks into Luke.

Luke looks adorable!??????????? Before realising who it is Mammon snaps at him to watch where he's going and then goes speechless. Luke says he saw a couple arguing and came to check it out cause they looked like trouble (can't believe Simeon sent a child to scope out a suspicious couple screaming in the middle of the sidewalk about who loves the other the most). Mammon takes offense at the arguing comment and Luke brushes him off to instead talk to Mc about not seeing them in a long time. Mammon snaps at being brushed off and Luke just completely ignores him to hug MC and keep talking about how it's really MC. Mammon does he whole 'no hugging, no getting close, no staring I don't want your germs on MC' routine. MC ignores him and tells Luke that they really missed him, Luke says he missed them too and that actually he missed MC 100X whatever amount they missed him and that he planned on getting in touch with them but the grand opening had them busy. Inside the cafe they meet Simeon who is happily surprised that MC and Mammon are their first customers but that they aren't supposed to open yet. MC asks them what the cafe is about and they say it's a cover for them while they are in the human world and when MC then asks them why they're here Simeon says that Michael appointed him to coordinate relations between the human world and celestial realm. MC and Mammon's stomachs start growling loud enough to resemble Beel's and Simeon offers them breakfast when they remember they haven't eaten. MC catches them up on what's happened and Luke and Simeon laugh about MC now officially being the brothers' babysitter. Mammon says that the angels are really starting to get on his nerves and what they really came for was the coffee that everyone's talking about.

Simeon says that it's just a stupid rumour. MC says but wouldn't it be good for business. Simeon says yeah but since the cafe is just a cover they don't really care about making money and that as angels marketing under a false advertisement is something he can't condone. mammon asks how a rumour like that started and Simeon says that a girl had accidentally walked into the cafe thinking it was some other place and he had given her a free cup of coffee just to see if their new brew tasted good. the girl had later had unexpected, dramatic good luck in her romantic life and had spread the rumour. MC asks if this means Simeon has cupid like powers. Simeon says that he doesn't have that kind of powers, though some angels do. Luke says that angels possess powers from the moment they are born but like humans who are good at some things and bad at others, certain angels can only do certain things with their powers and that angels are assigned a rank based on how skilled they are at what they can do. Simeon's an archangel. Archangels serve as warriors in the celestial realm. And this is really interesting cause it means that Simeon actually fought against the brothers during the war and was not just a passive bystander. It also means Mammon was probably an archangel cause of his 'warrior' card and probably the only archangel from his brothers considering they don't have similar cards. Mammon teases Luke about just being a lower level grunt and Luke says that's still just in training and in the process of determining what he's good at meaning he's not been assigned a rank yet. Simeon says that since Michael expects great things from Luke that'll be really successful. Mammon teases Luke about how if he works hard and aims for the stars he might one day be on the top - a seraph (If this is the highest rank does this mean that's what Michael and Lucifer were?). Luke says that he's actually hoping to be a principality, which mammon laughs about. Simeon finally serves breakfast and talks about wanting to find a way to squash the rumour. MC offers to help and Mammon (rightfully) calls them out on sticking their nose where it doesn't belong again and says he's not gonna help unless they offer to pay him in gold. MC uses puppy dog eyes. It's super effective. Man actually starts blushing and panting and gasping before he gives up and agrees to help. pls sir there's a child here. Simeon calls out Mammon for being a hopeless simp (he actually just says "You really do adore Mc, don't you Mammon?") Luke says MC and Mammon are fucking disgusting and if he watches another second of this BS he's gonna hurl.

while brainstorming about how exactly they are gonna spread a rumour about the first rumour not being true Mammon says that if people saw a couple drink the coffee and instantly break up it might work but hahah it's not like you have one of those. Simeon thinks it's a brilliant idea. MC agrees and Mammon who has probably never been complimented for his plans combusts before pulling it together and puts on his confident narcissistic persona. Luke and Simeon eye up MC and Mammon as their potential couple. Mammon refuses cause he doesn't want to fight with MC even if it's just an act. Simeon offers for their breakfast to be on the house if Mammon agrees and Mammon says he already assumed it was (I mean so did I...). MC says they would really like Mammon to be their partner for this and obviously he instantly blushes and caves in. Luke calls MC out on being a manipulative little shit. Simeon asks MC and Mammon to practice a breakup before the customers come. MC can either start with 'there's something I want to tell you...' - Mammon asks if that's the way they are gonna start and then gets sad and asks them to reconfirm if this is actually an act. or they can start with 'ugh! I can't take it anymore!', and mammon gets shocked and then sad cause he says that since there are so many things wrong with him he can't decide what they are upset about and HOLY SHIT can we get this man some therapy!????? MC gets to pick one outta three problems. 1. He needs to return what he borrowed from them - he says he will eventually. 2. he needs to stand up to lucifer for once - he says he would if he could but each time he tries lucifer just gets worse. 3. he needs to just come out and admit he loves them - he blushes and says not in front of the angels and that he'll do it when they are alone. He then growls and says he has complaints too and that there's a lot he wants to say. he then starts dishing out actual grievances while Simeon and luke awkwardly watch. Luke says something along the lines of 'uhh i don't think he's acting anymore'. Mammon while blushing and sad says that MC is always flirting with others, and asks why they stay up gaming with levi all night, or why they let Asmo touch them all the time,  and why they let Belphie sleep on their lap without offering Mammon to do so, And how he absolutely hates the way they lock eyes with Lucifer and just smile and how he doesn't even want them to breathe in front of Lucifer and can we pls talk about the complex Mammon has regarding Lucifer? Lucifer really just took all his trauma and daddy issues and passed it on to his kids huh? Mammon again while blushing says he wants nothing to do with someone like MC and that it's over he then tries to growl at them but he fails cause "Dammit! Like I could ever really say that to you! I love you, MC! And I'll NEVER break up with you, okay?! NEVER!" and god this man is so soft my insides are melting i can't deal with this shit. Simeon sighs about Mammon being useless ((((Probably while Mammon and MC cling on to each other and cry about having to fake break up with each other i dunno they're both pretty useless))))

Since the whole fake breakup thing failed the cafe is packed and Simeon has MC and Mammon working for him during the rush. Satan and Beel end up walking in, when MC asks them how they are doing they both say they are better. Satan had found a curse that ended up transferring all his illness to someone he hates (RIP Lucifer i guess) and Beel's stomach is strong enough that he got over it quicker than the rest. Despite insisting they're only here as paying customers Simeon puts them to work with a sweet smile and a dark purple aurora reminiscent of Lucifer's and a flash of lightening (I love how they keep revealing that Simeon is secretly terrifying) with the reasoning that the cafe is flooded cause Mammon couldn't fake breakup with MC and as Mammon's brothers it's their duty to help out. Beel cries about having to work without being given to eat but is too terrified to actually protest. Mammon suggests MC and him sneaking away now that Satan and Beel are there, MC gives their best impression of Lucifer yelling Mammon (which considering it's previously fooled both Beel and Mammon is probably really good) and he gets back to work

back in their sitting room at home the four of them are beat, though Beel is happy considering he ate all the BLT sandwiches Simeon gave them as payment. Satan says it's a surprise to see the angels here and Mammon tells them about how Michael wants them to coordinate relations between the human world and celestial realm, Satan says that's sus cause that's usually a job for dominions not archangels and that it probably means that Michael is planning something. Mammon says "so you mean he's plotting something again?" . MC can ask about Michael from 1. Mammon - He says he's a demon masquerading as an angel. And that the punishments he gave Mammon gave him shiver, though Satan says that Mammon earned those punishments. Still doesn't excuse the fact that an angel was able to deliver punishments that can still make a demon who had to survive with Lucifer's punishments shiver... 2. Satan - Satan says that back then he was still just a part of Lucifer and could only see the world through Lucifer's eyes. He says that Michael was everything that humans imagine an angel to be and more and that he had a certain presence about him. Beel says the same could be said about Lucifer. 3. Beel -  he said he smelled tasty.......like sweets. Mammon says that he was always eating sweet stuff. Mammon says that Michael was A LOT like Lucifer. Satan says that while they were the polar opposite in terms of appearance it felt like they were twins. Mammon says that Michael was crazy about Lucifer (I mean he still has a weird shrine for him so yeah...) and that he really cared about lucifer. Satan says that it's cause Lucifer embodied everything Michael wasn't but wished to be and that he projected himself onto lucifer. Beel says they should probably open up an umbrella. Mammon goes wtf and Beel says cause it's raining. Mammon goes 'bro wtf we're inside'. Satan goes 'actually wait no I'm getting wet'. MC notes a leak in the ceiling, above which is Asmo's bathroom. They've been in this Mansion for little over a week and it's already leaking...

That's the end of the lesson. I'll post screenshots of Luke and Simeon's outfits in a bit. Cause they've been talking about Michael's appearance and personality and cause at the end of the last season he told MC he'll meet them soon do you think we'll actually get to see him? Is it bad that the angels scare me more than the demons? Since they brought up the witches while in the human world do you think we'll get to meet them/have more backstory? hdgudysidhzsjb I loved this lesson and I have so many questions that need to be answered... Let me know what you think!

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