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pariahsparadise · 2 years

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afterlife | c. d.

nav. | m.list

request: hiya, so i'm currently obsessed with Cedric I've been watching Goblet of Fire over and over again. what about a Cedric Diggory x fem!reader. Where a new teacher arrives at Hogwarts with the last name Diggory. (He’s like the youngest professor at Hogwarts). One day the class finished early and one of his students asked about his father and mother. So he tells them the story about his parents. How his father died and his mother was left to raise their child by herself months after his death. And how she died sacrificing her life for her son since she was a muggle born. And as well how legend says that they’re still in the castle but as ghosts, happier now that they have each other in the afterlife

pairing(s): cedric diggory x fem!reader, charles diggory (oc) x mom!reader

a/n: sorry this took so long to get to, this probably isn't exactly what you had in mind but hopefully it still works? thank you for the request! flashbacks will be in italics.

trigger warnings: character death, shitty writing, unedited work, swearing

wc: 1.8k

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

Professor Charles Diggory was known around Hogwarts as the kind-eyed History of Magic professor, but more commonly, the offspring of deceased Triwizard champion Cedric Diggory and his girlfriend, Y/N L/N. He was one of the youngest teachers Hogwarts had seen till date, charms genetically inherited from his father, but his wit was his mothers alone. Upon laying eyes on him for the first time, surrounded by other first years in the Great Hall, Professor McGonagall had nearly broken down; for he was a carbon copy of a certain Hufflepuff she had taught years ago. And when Charles returned to Hogwarts aged 21, to apply for the teaching position, she had actually done it: he was older than both of his parents lived to be.

There was comfort in the thought, though, that this orphan had survived. That Y/N’s sacrifice hadn’t been for nothing.

It was a cold winter day and class was nearly finished, when a rather plucky Gryffindor finally summoned up the courage to ask Professor Diggory the story about his parents. “It is historical,” the witch with the scarlet tie reasoned, “Since it was a direct effect of the war, and History is always more interesting when it’s told through stories. No pressure, though.”

Charles sighed, running a hand through his hair- if anyone had caught sight of the back of his head, they would have mistaken him for his father- before speaking, “Fine, I’ll tell you, nosy lot.” The class chuckled, for his tone bore no malice, but quietened quickly as he spoke again.

“My mother, Y/N L/N, was a muggle born witch in Cedric’s year. The two of them met in their first year, but it wasn’t till the fifth that they finally started dating.”

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

“Oi, L/N! Wait up!”

You turned, taken aback by the six foot frame running frantically towards you and slowed your step, your books balancing precariously in your arms.

“Yes, Diggory?” you asked, noting the way Cedric appeared to fumble with his words with a raise of your eyebrow. His cheeks pinked darker the longer your eyes stayed on him, and when you threw a glance over his shoulder, you saw a small crowd of his friends gathered in a cluster, both of your names thrown into the mix of the conversation they were having.

“Let me carry your books,” Cedric blurted out, already reaching for them as he spoke, “I’ll walk you to Potions. You do have Potions, right?”

“Yes,” you said, letting him relieve you of your items, “But you have Charms. That’s on the other side of the castle, Flitwick will have your head-”

“Let him,” Cedric cut you off, offering you his free hand before heading to your class. It was a testament to your relationship that the two of you had each other’s schedules memorised, he knew that, but he wasn’t going to ask you out while his friends ogled at the two of you. No, he didn’t want it to seem insincere, even if he was anything but. You had gone from being a stranger to someone he believed was his soulmate, and he wasn’t going to fuck it up.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

“Wow. You look like shit.”

“Way to win a girl’s heart, Ced.”

He laughed, sliding into the seat next to you, getting his own books out. He had spent most of the day searching for you, before Nearly Headless Nick had finally taken pity on the lost Hufflepuff, directing him to the library, where you were frantically cramming for your OWLs next week.

“I don’t even know why you bother studying,” Cedric said, noting the way your hand shook in exhaustion as you scribbled down notes after notes, the dark circles under your eyes etching black holes in his heart, “We all know you’re going to ace every subject. Wouldn’t be surprised if you topped the entire grade.”

“I won’t,” you said with conviction, “Not if I don’t drastically improve my understanding of Herbology in the next five days.”

“I can help with that,” the words were out of Cedric’s mouth before he even knew it, but judging by the way your head snapped up to finally look at him, your tired eyes somewhat filling with relief, it was worth it. “Really? But don’t you have your own OWLs to study for?”

“I do,” he agreed, “But I can’t really study on my own, as you probably know by now. So why don’t we help each other out?”

“Alright,” you responded, nodding your head slowly as you considered it, “But don’t you dare try to distract me, Diggory. These exams are important, and I don’t want to fuck them up.”

“Promise,” Cedric said solemnly, holding a pinky up like you had told him muggles do. You just laughed and swatted his hand away, before the two of you hit the books.

Five long days later, it turned out, you were the one who distracted him. Cedric was just about to walk into his first examination when he heard his name called, and upon turning, found arms thrown around his neck and soft lips on his mouth.

“For good luck,” you had cheekily whispered to him before running off, leaving the poor boy standing dazed in front of the classroom door, one hand touching his tingling lips.

“Well, Mr. Diggory?” McGonagall’s voice cut into the poems of praise he was inwardly writing for you, but she sounded almost amused. “Planning on entering anytime soon?”

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

“In my father’s seventh year, as you all know, he was chosen for the Triwizard Championship. His competition was Viktor Krum, Fleur Delacour, and Harry Potter. My father placed second in the first task, after successfully defeating the Swedish Short-Snout dragon. For the second task, it was my mother who was held hostage underwater, something I like to assume is what propelled him to finish first.”

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

You were pregnant. It wasn’t something you had expected would happen, but now that you knew, you more than welcomed it. Your only regret was that you found out before Cedric had entered the tournament, maybe the knowledge that it was more than just you who needed him to stay alive would have held him back. Or maybe it wouldn’t have, you’d never know.

At school, you found yourself thrust into newfound popularity. Cedric had always been a social butterfly, having a friend in almost every corner of the castle at all times, but it had never extended so much to you. Everywhere you went, you received a clap on the back and a cheer, but you also had your fair share of jealous girls and guys, wondering what exactly it was that Cedric saw in you. What was curious was that you had barely caught sight of your boyfriend himself, but you reasoned that you’d see enough of him when all this was over.

The summons from Dumbledore was curious, but once he explained what the task was, you found no choice but to consent. Maybe it’d even give you a reason to finally talk to Cedric.

You were underwater for a long time, but it felt like mere seconds before you resurfaced again, Cedric’s hands desperately clinging to your waist as the two of you gasped for breath after breath, until your breathing finally returned to normal. Your hands found his shoulders, and you stayed there for a second, Cedric’s forehead pressing against yours as he asked you if you were okay in quiet, worried whispers. (A picture of the scene would make the cover of the Daily Prophet the next day, but neither of you knew or cared.)

“I’m pregnant,” you whispered into his ear as the two of you sat on the docks again, wrapping your towel around the shivering boy because he had given up his own to someone else. His arm came to wrap around your shoulder and pull you closer, before your words finally registered and he looked at you with wide eyes.

“Are you serious?” he asked, eyes searching yours for any hint of deception or mischievous. When you nodded yes, Cedric meshed his lips with yours, and though the crowd roared, the only thing that mattered was his hand tilting up your chin, and your own resting over his derailing heart.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

“My father,” Charles said, but his voice cracked on the words, glass splintering on the floor, “As you know, died at the hands of Voldemort. It was my mother who was left behind to raise me, and she did the best she could, for the three years following my birth.”

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

You weren’t safe anymore. Voldemort had put a price on the head of all muggle-born witches and wizards, and you were one of the last ones to survive. You had fled from city to city, finding refuge in the short moments you shared with your son, the few moments of peace where you could just hold him and shut your eyes, pretending your life wasn’t the nightmare it really was. A part of you knew that when they found him cradled in the hands of a Mudblood witch, they would consider your son poisoned, his magic tarnished. They would spare neither of you.

Currently, you were hiding out in Amos Diggory’s home. Your son, Charles Cedric Diggory, seemed happier with his grandfather than he had in a long while. Watching the two of them together, you felt an odd sensation of peace. An odd feeling of acceptance.

It was why, when the Ministry came calling, ripping the neighbourhood apart, you gave yourself up quietly. You wrote your son a letter explaining everything that had happened, explaining why he had no parents, and entrusted it to Amos to deliver when your boy was old enough. You were silent till the end, even when Umbridge taunted you, asking for any last words, you tipped your chin up defiantly, your mouth sealed shut.

You died quietly, but the silence was deafening.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

“She was executed, along with countless other muggleborns, before Harry Potter finally trumped Voldemort.”

The class was silent, save for the sniffles and sobs of a handful of students, silent tears streaming down the face of the witch who had asked. Charles took a shaky breath to regain composition, his own eyes glistening, before he continued the story.

“Legend has it,” he said, softer now, “That the two of them, Y/N L/N and Cedric Diggory, the brave people who I am proud to call my parents, are still in this castle, but as ghosts. Hidden away somewhere, maybe, no one knows exactly where they are. But a fortunate few have been lucky enough to glimpse a girl walking to class and a boy with a Hufflepuff tie scrambling behind her, her books in his hands. They are happier now, because although they missed out on time while they were alive, they have plenty of it in the afterlife.”

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battinscn · 2 years

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CARDIGAN — cedric diggory x f! reader

CONTENT WARNING: angst, so much angst/ pivotal character death

SUMMARY: when cedric survives the third task, he takes it upon himself to become an auror. he joins harry during the battle of the hogwarts and fight alongside him, to repay the young boy for saving his life. we can always change our fate, but not what is destined for us.

A/N: based on this request. jfc it’s taken me 2 months to write it, i’m so so sorry. hope you like it nevertheless.

WC/ AVG. READING TIME: 3565 words/ 16 minutes

return to the cedric masterlist here

YOU WATCHED FROM the stands next to mr diggory as harry potter hovered over a body, the triwzard cup next to it.

you were about to cheer when harry started wailing, "he's back! he's back!"

since you were slightly taller than him, mr diggory had asked you what was going on. you tried to peer over all the standing bodies but to no avail, simpling shrugging to the older man in response.

that was when ernie had shouted, "it's diggory! that's cedric!"

"pardon?" you and mr diggory whipped your heads toward your blonde friend.

"that's cedric body." ernie exclaimed.

without thinking twice, mr diggory had started weaving through the stands, "let me through, let me through. that's my son."

you were hot on his tail, practically shoving your peers to the side to get on the grounds.

"my boy!" mr diggory crouched down next to cedric's unconscious body.

"what's happened? what the fuck happened potter?" you shook harry roughly, wanting an explanation.

"h-he's back. you-know-who's back, he used the crutacius on diggory!" harry sobbed.

you felt your blood grow cold, and you lost your footing. you would have fallen onto the floor if it were not for ernie holding you up.

you watched as the head of houses ushered the students back into the castle.

you watched as harry retold the events of the past hour to headmaster dumbledore.

you watched as cedric was brought away back to hospital wing to be healed.

throughout it all, your chest heaved as your eyes felt deafened. your body was shaking as ernie held you close, comforting you.

without realising, your legs carried you towards the castle entrance and outside the double doors of the hogwarts hospital wing.

mr diggory had apparated home for the night, despite his reluctance.

for student safety, dumbledore had sent anyone who was not staff or a student away from hogwarts grounds.

"are you sure you don't want to return to your dorm?" hannah asked you once more.

you shook your head as a silent 'no'.

"let's just leave for tonight, i'm knackered," justin whispered to hannah and ernie.

"what? have you lost your mind? we can't just leave her alone, she's beyond devastated." hannah whisper scolded justin.

"but it's not like us being here make any difference. she hasn't spoken a single word in the last two hours," justin frowned.

"mate, you're unbeliavable. i can't believe you," ernie shook his head.

"you lot can leave. i'll be fine by myself," you finally spoke up, effectively stopping their small fight.

"y/n, fletchley was just being a dickhead. we would stay here with you all night if we have to." hannah's eyes softened as she shifted her gaze to you.

"it's fine, i'll be fine," you pursed a smile.

"see? she said she's fine," justin started walking away dragging ernie and hannah along with him, "come on then."

"i'm sorry," hannah turned around and mouthed to you before turning the corner of the empty corridor.

you sat by the large windowsill in the corridor and rest your head in your hands as you prayed that cedric would be alright, that he would bounce back as fit as a fiddle.

you felt two figures settle next to you, causing you to pick your head up.

"hey," ernie, who was on your right, placed a hand on your shoulder while hannah, who was on your left, rubbed small circles on your back.

"we had to follow fletchley back just so he'd shut up," hannah explained, "we would never leave you alone."

"oh! here," ernie placed a grey knit cardigan on your lap. you knew it to be cedric's. "thought it might make you feel better."

you picked the cardigan up and slid your arms into it, tugging it closer to your body for warmth.

"thank you," you said gratefully, mustering the best smile your heartbroken and worried self could.

"your welcome lovey. ced will be okay, he's always been a tough arse." hannah joked.

"yea, he is, isn't he," you chuckled lightly.

hannah looped her arm around yours and you leaned your head on ernie's shoulder.

the three of you stayed like that through the night, solemn and hoping that cedric would be alright.

you woke up the next morning with an ache in your neck and a weight in your lap.

you blinked the sleep away and lifted your head up from ernie's shoulder, the bones in your neck cracking as you did. you looked down in your lap to see that hannah had fallen asleep on it.

ernie was still asleep as well, the back of his head leaning against the window behind you.

it was clear that neither of them were in a comfortable sleeping position and that they would've preferred spending the night in their plush beds. however, they had chose to accompany and comfort you through the night.

you were beyind grateful you had the friends you had.

ernie and hannah soon stirred awake when the doors of the hospital wing opened, mdm pomfrey and a healer dressed in st mungo's uniform walked out.

"is he alright? cedric, i mean," you asked politely.

"mr diggory's alive. he is no longer under critical condition, but is under induced sleep from the calming draught that was administered."

"yes, of course."

"i must make haste to see dumbledore and inform him of mr diggory's condition, you may visit if you wish," madam pomfrey gestured to the slight crack in the hospital ring door.

the three of you nodded, signalling a small goodbye to the two healers.

"we're going to return to our dorms, we'll come back after breakfast?" ernie suggested.

"yea, i'll see you two later," you agreed.

the creak of the hospital wing door opening echoed through the room.

you pattered into stone-walled room over to the cot cedric was lying in.

you frowned as you watched cedric—your cedric—laying lifelessly. you urged the will to cry again and sucked in a deep breath, sitting on the wooden chair that was next to the cot.

"oh ced," you sighed, hands trembling as you brushed the back of your knuckles against his pale, cold, face.

you pulled the woolen blanket further up cedric's torso in hopes of helping him conserve some warmth.

you were sat on the uncomfortable chair for about an hour when ernie, justin, and hannah walked in.

"has he woken up since?" hannah asked and you shook your head.

the four of you conversed in small talk when you heard the rustling of sheets behind you.

you whipped your head towards cedric and watched as his eyelids slowly fluttered open.

he tried to sit up and ernie was immediately there to help cedric up.

your poured cedric a cup of water and held the bendy straw to his lips.

"are you feeling alright?" hannah placed a comforting hand on cedric's shoulder.

you placed the cup on the small table by the cot.

"nothing hurts so i'm feeling rather well," cedric cleared his throat, his voice scratchy.

"is it true? that you-know-who's back?" justin blurted out.

you winced slightly at the bluntness of the question while ernie and hannah sent him death glares for his lack of sensitivity.

cedric licked his lips and nodded.

justin was about to open his mouth to ask yet another absurd question when ernie thankfully cut him off.

"you scared us to death mate, but we're glad you're alright. our poor y/n's been worried sick the whole night," ernie gestured to you.

suddenly all eyes in the room were pointed at you and you sniffed, wiping the fallen tear that had excaped your eye with your palm.

you sniffed with a chuckle as to try and shake off the uneasiness of being the current center of attention.

"y/n..." cedric's eyes softened at your state.

ernie and hannah shared a look with a mutual understanding that it was their cue to leave, dragging justin along with them.

"lovey," cedric reached out to grab ahold one of your fidgeting hands.

"i don't even know why i'm crying. it's so selfish considering what you had to go through to end up here but i'm just relieved you're okay," you whimpered.

with his free hand cedric's callous but gentle touch wiped by your damp lash line.

"it's not selfish lovey, it's okay to feel worried. i'm all good now so you no more tears, okay?"

"okay," you nuzzled your cheek into cedric's hand, sighing softly.

"besides, madam pomfrey said all the bleeding was internal. that's where all the blood's supposed to be!" cedric had mischievous glint in his eyes, trying to lighten your dampened mood.

you could scoff at the boy's words, shaking your head with a small giggle you rebuttled, "you are so silly sometimes."

you lurched over to cedric so you were slightly hovering above him.

"i love you," you whispered, almost afraid that if you spoke too loud it would break the serenity of the hospital wing.

"i love you too," cedric whispered back with a kiss on your lips.

following the days of cedric's recovery, him and harry potter had explained to dumbledore in great detail what exactly happened in the maze during the third task.

it seemed as though not many people believed what they had to say, claiming that cedric and harry were just trying to claim their five seconds of fame.

but you trusted cedric and what he had to say, because your golden boy could never do such a thing like lie to officials.

it seemed that the incident with he-who-shall-not-be-named had caused a slight shift in cedric.

as much as cedric tried to put him a hardfront and false facade that he was just as fine as before, you knew that he was just trying not to make anyone worry about him.

you noticed how he was more jumpy than before. he was also more alert and wary of surroundings, almost as if preparing himself for an attack at all times.

not wanting to add more stress on the already heavy weight on his shoulders, you pretended not to know.

your NEWTS happened just months after the last task. thankfully, cedric did not let the trauma of the duel in little hangleton affect his marks.

both of you had done splendidly for them, not that it mattered anymore.

before, you had wished to work at the ministry of magic, but after they had discredited cedric for claiming voldemort's return, you quickly changed your mind.

you and cedric both wanted out of the wizarding world, having enough of everything that had happened during your last year in hogwarts.

instead, with the little money you had saved, you had opened a quaint bakery in muggle watford.

your business was doing rather well. something about magically baked pastires attracted muggles back to your shop regularly, not that your customers needed to know that.

life was peaceful and you and cedric were happy.

save the occasional nightmares cedric would need waking up from.

it took a year or two for your boyfriend to open up to you about the trauma he was experiencing.

"i'm scared. i'm beyond terrified that he's going to come back one day and finish what he couldn't that day," cedric admitted with sweaty palms and a heaving chest.

“lovey,” you cooed, running your hands through his hair then settling them on his cheeks.

“it stinks. it fucking stinks. because i want to be happy, i want to live a life where i’m not in fear every waking second,” cedric looked up at the ceiling and blinked quickly to rid the tears that were about to fall.

“i’m sorry that i will never truly understand what you had to go through and what you feel because of it, and i’m sorry that you, of all people, were a victim. i would take all the weight of your shoulders and carry them for you no hesitation. but i can’t do that. what i can do, however, i’d be here for you in every way possible. i can’t say that it’d be easy, but talking about your fears alleviates them.” you sucked in a breath and shifted your position in bed, sitting on the back of your calves so you could look right into cedric’s face.

“i love you so much ced and you’re such a courageous and strong man. the man i love with all my heart and soul. so when you’re ready, i’ll be here for you.” you tried a small smile.

silence filled the room for a while.

cedric said nothing but offered a small, albeit grateful, smile and that was enough for you to know that he was feeling a little bit better.

the birth of curtis edward diggory caused something to shift in cedric, in the best way possible.

since his son’s birth, cedric smiles a little bit brighter and the creases in his eyes were a little bit deeper.

curtis was your little bundle of joy and when your baby boy turned one, it felt like all the worries in yours and cedric’s life dissipated.

“hi little lovey, who’s my baby boy?” you cooed while bouncing curtis in your hip. he had yet to show any signs of magical capabilities but you knew it was soon come.

you were currently watching cedric who had just put in a tray of unbaked lemon biscuits.

“your little baker”, you thought, as cedric wiped his buttery hands on his apron and wiped the side of his cheek, leaving a dusty swab of flour in its wake.

“that’s the last for the sunday pickup order,” cedric walked over to your and curtis, placing kisses on the crown of both of your heads.

you basked in cedric’s embrace, your head on his chest while curtis was on yours.

you were in complete bliss.

the comforting atmosphere was broken when the flaps of an owl’s wings sounded through the kitchens.

cedric pulled away from you reluctantly with a confused glance to the window.

there, on the windowsill, perched an owl that looked awfully familiar.

the weasley family’s owl dropped the letter in cedric’s hands before flying off to deliver the other letters that filled it’s beak.

knowing that you and cedric wanted to separate your muggle lives from your magical ones as much as possible, bar the occasional visits from those closest to you, communication between family and friends were limited, letters included.

cedric’s eyes scanned the letter, the worry on his face growing as he read.

“p-potter…” cedric stuttered, “potter’s fighting voldemort, tonight, at hogwarts.”

your eyes widened in shock, “w-what?”

you and cedric decided to close up the shop early that day, returning home in a hurry.

curtis was napping with his cheek against your shoulder as you watched cedric pace the small area of your sitting room for what felt like a full hour.

cedric chewed on the back of his thumb, his furrowed brows in a deep frown.

“i have to go,” cedric said, almost as if it was the most obvious thing.

you quickly shot that idea down, “no, lovey, it’s not safe.”

“i have to. potter saved my life that day at the cemetery. the least i could do is fight by his side tonight.” cedric remained firm.

tears welled in your eyes and you hiccuped from the gut-wrenching sobs that were bubbling from inside you.

"darling..." cedric was on his knees in front of you, stroking your hair as you sat on the sofa trying your best not to wake curtis with your beating heartbeat and shaky voice.

"i-i know it's selfish, but i get to be selfish. i don't want you t-to g-go. i c-can't lose you, not again."

"i have to do this, you know that." cedric affirmed.

you nodded your head in understanding. you knew that since the triwizard tournament, cedric had always felt indebted to potter, that he owed his life to the young boy, but you deserved the right to beg your husband to stay, no matter how selfish it was.

"you won't lose me, neither of you won't. i promise." cedric held your face with both hands.

you watched with deafened ears as cedric changed into a more ‘battle appropriate’ outfit.

the bottom dresser was opened for the first time in a while, and cedric picked up his wand.

“i’ll always love the both of you, you know that right?” cedric began his teary goodbye.

you couldn't find it in you to respond. merely nodding your head and sniffing at his rhetorical question.

cedric placed a kiss on curtis’ chubby cheeks before placing him back in your arms.

“i love you, lovey,” you mumbled against his lips, fisting cedric’s shirt.

“i love you,” cedric chased a kiss, pulling away only to wrap his arm around you shoulders, his hand holding the back of your head endearingly.

with a small wave, and blow kiss from you and curtis, cedric disapparited.

the only way you could keep your anxiousness at bay was to keep yourself busy and so you rushed around the house, cleaning and wiping down every surface.

you played with curtis for a bit, then cooked dinner for the both of you. you eventually fell asleep on the sofa, curtis laying on your torso.

you awoke the next day to knocking on your front door. you placed curtis in the small crib in the living room and stalked to open the door.

the moment you saw the solemn look on the two ministry officials that were standing in the corridor, your stomach dropped.

you had finally signed a franchise deal with a major corporation to expand your small bakery to open more locations around london.

that meant you could afford to move out your rental.

it was difficult to live in a home you had started with the person you thought you would have spent the rest of your life with.

waking up to a cold and empty bed was miserable and yet you felt guilty for moving.

moving away felt like you were leaving cedric.

you heaved a sigh and shook yourself out of your thoughts as you placed the paper-wrapped plates into the large moving carton.

you heard rustling and the barreling of feet on the parquet flooring.

you turned on your feet, ready to greet curtis with open arms but as you did, you were met with your brunette boy clad in a familiar knitted grey cardigan, a unicorn hair, ash, wand in his hand.

your breath hitched as you dropped the plate you were holding in your hand.

curtis immediately flinched as the ceramic shattered into a millio pieces over the kitchen floor.

“shit,” you murmured under your breath as you bent down quickly to pick the pieces up in your hands, “curtis, stay in the front room okay? let mummy clean up.”

you swept away the remains of the dish and vacuumed the area for good measure, less curtis cut himself accidentally.

when you walked into the front room to see curtis sitting down on the sofa, his legs dangling off it since he was too short to reach the floor, while inspecting cedric’s old wand.

when the ministry had visited you the day after the battle, they had returned cedric’s wand to you.

after the battle, you swore off the wizarding world bar the biweekly visits to cedric’s parents’ place. you weren’t sure what you would do when curtis would start showing his magical abilities but for now, you wanted him safe and away from the world that took your world away from you.

“curtis? where’d you find all this?” you sucked in a breath and balanced yourself by gripping the arm of the armchair and settling shakily into it.

curtis looked so much like his father, and now clad in cedric’s cardigan, it felt like deja vu.

“you told me to help back the things in your room and i found them in a box under your bed,” curtis explained.

noting your expressionless face, curtis hopped off the sofa and treaded lightly towards you.

“are you mad at me?” he asked with his adorable doe eyes staring up at you.

“n-no, no, lovey, i’m not mad. it’s just, those things were daddy’s a-and you remind me so much of him,” you swiped your cheek with your palm.

living in this house was big enough of a reminded of cedric’s passing, and so after his burial, you packed everything that reminded you of cedric in a box, never to see the light of day again because you knew just one look would cause all the effort you had put in to try and move on to crumble.

but somehow seeing curtis jn cedric’s cardigan, which was overtly big on the little boy, it didn’t bring up any miserable or longing feelings for your deceased husband. instead the feeling of curtis being able to have some form of physical connection to his father made you feel warm inside.

“really? this cardigan’s daddy’s?”

you nodded along and stroked curtis’ hair, “it is, and you look so handsome in it, just like daddy.”

curtis beamed at your statement and pulled the cardigan, which was so big on him that the hem of it dragged along the floor, closed to his body.

“can i keep it?” curtis asked hopefully.

“of course you can, little lovey,” you offered a small but loving smile.

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#cedric diggory x reader #cedric diggory x you #cedric diggory x female reader #cedric diggory x y/n #cedric diggory #cedric #cedric fanfic #cedric x reader #cedric x you #cedricdiggory #cedric x y/n #cedric diggory angst #cedric angst #angst #dracosluvbotwrites

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thestarsarebrightertonight · 6 days

Text

imgonnagetyouback // mattheo riddle x fem hufflepuff reader

playlist: imgonnagetyouback - taylor swift / get him back! - olivia rodrigo

summary : mattheo riddle does not prank anyone , well asides from you and youve reached your breaking point.

y/n used , hufflepuff reader , swearing , jealousy, fighting , enemies to lovers

masterlist tppd series masterlist

you screamed in horror as cold water splashed down on you , soaking your whole uniform , hair and bag.

"WHAT THE FUCK!" you screeched in pure horror , you looked around the hall in search of a certain smirking face you had come to know all too well.

every student in the hall stared silently , many laughing and some first years looking scared at your angry demeanor. however the one who laughed the most was mattheo riddle , of course.

the boy who has tormented you since first year , endless pranks , endless teasing and zero remorse - mattheo riddle. you dont know what you did to deserve it , but you could easily say it had made you hate the boy more than anyone on the planet. it started with mean nicknames , getting the whole year to call you snotty in first year just because you blew your nose into a tissue in class once. it makes no sense right? completely unprovoked!

"oh dont you just look lovely, baby" mattheo smirked as he walked towards you , holding the bucket he had used to dump water all over you with a simple levitation charm.

"im going you KILL YOU MATTHEO RIDDLE!" you screamed , standing right in front of him and grabbing his collar.

"wow calm down sunshine , its just a bit of water," his smug expression never left his face as he started down at you , his eyes flicking down to your chest where your bra was clearly visible due to your white - soaked - shirt.

you gasped in horror , removing your arms to button up your robe and hide it , " you fucking pervert!"

he held his hands up in defense, "they looked at me first"

"merlin i really really hate you mattheo riddle , rot in hell!" you screamed in his pretty face , running away and pushing past people to get to the hufflepuff common room. mattheos eyes followed you , grinning before walking away when you finally left his sight.

----

"ive got to get him back! hes gotten away with bullying me for too long!" you ranted to your best friend cedric who sat on your bed, listening to the rant he had to endure nearly every day.

"he isnt bullying you y/n , hes teasing you because he likes you," cedric said for the 1000th time since you came back to hogwarts from summer break.

"cedric, hes made my life hell! i hate him and his stuid face GOD!" you groaned.

cedric just stared up at you , bored , "he makes fun of you fir being a hufflepuff right? -you nodded- then charm all his robes to hufflepuff ones then. if hes such a egotistical slytherin that you say he is , he'll hate that"

you grinned excitedly , "yes! his ego is bigger than the whole castle , itd ruin him!"

cedric smiled at your happiness as you hugged him , "thanks ced , love you!"

he laughed as you grabbed your wand and ran out of your dorm , leaving cedric to sigh and get up , following you.

---

the next day your leg bounced in excitement , you had suceeded in making his robes hufflepuff and now it was time to see him angrily burst into the great hall.

"y/n? earth to y/nnn," cedric sang , waving a hand infront of your face , finally catching your attention , "youre gonna make it obvious it was you."

"oh i want him to know it was me , it is so on!" you said quickly , turning back to the enterance of the great hall as cedric sighed in defeat , continuing his talk with the hufflepuff captian.

then a grinning mattheo , wearing a hufflepuff robe and tie walked into the room , looking around until catching your eye and smirking.

you gasped in horror , why is he smiling?!!

you continued to stare at him as a ravenclaw boy walked over.

"like the robes mattheo," the boy said as mattheo smirked.

"thanks my girlfriend got me them , y/n," mattheo said back happily as your face twisted in horror , immediately rising from the hufflepuff table and rushing over.

you stood in front of the smirking slytherin and shook your head at the ravenclaw, "hes NOT my boyfriend dont worry!"

mattheo looked down at you and wrapped his arms around your waist from behind , resting his head on top of yours , "oh i am"

you felt heat rush to your cheeks as the ravenclaw boy just nodded in confusion before walking away silently.

horrified you turned around to face mattheo as his arms remained around you , "what the fuck are you doing!!"

"what? you gave me some hufflepuff robes it was clearly a decleration of your little claim on me , love" he smirked at you , playing with your hair with one hand.

"i would rather die! take the robes off!" you shouted as you tried to wrestle the robe off of him , he had no reaction and just smiled at you.

"stripping me down infront of everyone? i didnt see you as the type but im all in, " he said with a wink.

you immediately stopped what you was doing as his hand grabbed yours , pausing your attempt to take off the hufflepuff tie , "stop telling everyone im your girlfriend riddle , its weird!"

"manifestation am i right?" he laughed , bringing your connected hands down as you scoffed.

"youre so annoying!" you shouted in anger , turning around to go sit back down at the hufflepuff table.

"merlin im gonna kill him!" you vented to your friends once you sat down , but they all looked besides you , "what?"

"meeting friends so early , wow we really are going fast!" mattheo grinned next to you.

"go away riddle!" you seethed.

"y/n you dragged him here.." susan said pointing down to your hand still holding mattheos , you gasped in terror and let go quickly.

"go! shoo!" you pushed him away like a wild animal.

"i cant , im a hufflepuff now so im sitting here," mattheo smiled before grabbing a plate and scooping food onto it , resting his arm around your waist.

you stared at him in disbelief , "UGH!".

he simply grinned at you pulling you in closer to him , how you remained for the rest of breakfast.

----

"so i assume you know a certain wild animal called , mattheo riddle , right?" you whispered to the twins who nodded in unision , "well you must know how hes tormented me these past years. i need to get him back."

the twins looked at eachother with smirks , signalling for you to step closer as to not be heard by anyone in the corridor you had rushed them into , "we think the best way for you to get him back is to make him jealous"

"jealous?" you asked in confusion, backing away , "cmon guys youre the kings of pranks please just give me something to make him smell really bad or something-"

"no y/n. first of all thank you but trust us , you want to know the first fight mattheo riddle got into?" george asked as you nodded in intruige.

"it was with a guy that was going to ask you out in third year," fred finished as george cringed recalling the brutal beating.

"what?!" you gasped , "a guy was going to ask me out and that litlle DEVIL ruined it?!".

they both looked at eachother and sighed , "that isnt the point dear y/n. just...just do as we say. you need to get a fake boyfriend - like cedric , and make sure everyone knows. believe us , you will see mattheo riddle just as angry as you are when he pranks you."

you sigh in defeat , "okay. i just need to convince cedric."

they both nodded and stepped back from the secret huddle the three of you had formed , "good giving revenge advice to you little miss hufflepuff, good luck."

you nodded slowly as the three of you walked in opposite directions.

----

"cedric please!! the twins said its the only thing that will work!" you whined as you grabbed cedrics arm , stopping his pacing around your dorm room.

"and i agree with them but why did it have to be me!-"

"ced , youre my best friend , if i had to fake date any guy itd be you." you reassured him as he finally met your eyes.

there was a long pause before cedric sighed in defeat , "fine , but dont you dare kiss me!-"

"cedric i know your first kiss is reserved for miss cho chang , dont worry!" you laughed as he cracked a small smile.

----

over the next few days you made the effort to hold cedrics hand more ,laugh at his jokes more and tell everyone possible how much of a lovely boyfriend he is. the word had travelled pretty fast and the second it reached mattheo riddle his whole damenor changed.

you were currently sitting at the hufflepuff table with your head on cedrics shoudler , facing the slytherin table and a very angry mattheo riddle who tightened his pale fist.

you laughed at susans joke , before hearing an abrupt slam on the slytherin table , no one else seemed to notice or care but you watched in fear as mattheo riddle jumped from the table and stared straight at cedric , beginning to come over.

in a panic you grabbed cedrics face whispering in desperation, "kiss me cedric!"

"what no!" he whisper yelled in horror , finally catching a glimpse at the fuming riddle heading his way as he gulped at the sight, "why!?"

"the weasley twins told me when he reaches a breaking point we have to , please! i have to get him back after all these years!"

cedric sighed in frustration , "you owe me!"

you nodded as you both moved closer to eachother , lips about to touch until -

cedric got roughly dragged from his seat on the bench , mattheo holding his robes and punching him.

you gasped in suprise not having truly thought of the consequence a raged mattheo would have on cedrics safety , jumping up from the table you watched cedric land a punch on mattheo face.

you cringed at the sight as you tugged on mattheos arm , finally pulling him away from cedric.

"get off of him mattheo!" you shouted.

"tell him to get off you first! ill fuck you up golden boy diggory-!" mattheo shouted at him as cedric attempted to jump back onto him , resulting in you stomping out of the hall , dragging mattheo along with you.

----

finally getting to your dorm you opened the door and shoved mattheo in , slamming the door behind you.

he staggered slightly before you pushed him down on the bed , pacing around the room as he sat and watched.

"what the fuck were you doing!" you exclaimed.

"i was teaching that dickhead a lesson!-" he argued back , being cut off by you pointing a finger in his face.

"DONT call ced a dickhead!" you screamed.

"ced?! CED?! fucking hell he even has a nickname, " he scoffed sourly.

"hes had a nickname for years , hes my bestfriend!".

"yeah cause bestfriends kiss eachother and tell everyone theyre dating right?!" he shouted back.

you paused at this suddenly realising why he had fought cedric in the first place , because of your stupid plan you only now realised was never going to end well.

turning to look mattheo in the face you silently walked towards him , stopping infront of him as he looked up at you. you stared down at him, noticing the bleeding cut on his cheek and running to grab your first aid things in your drawer.

you stood infront of him again, grabbing his chin and forcing him to look up at you allowing you a view of the cut as you grabbed a band-aid from the small box. he watched you with softened eyes as you wiped the cut softly and delicatly placed the band-aid.

"im sorry," you whispered letting go off his chin as his hands went up to your hips , pulling you in between his knees, "i had this stupid plan of getting back at you - the weasley twins told me youd get really angry if i pretended to date cedric. i guess i only just realised why you got so angry."

"why did i get so angry?" he asked softly , wanting to hear you say it.

"you love me." you whispered as he bit back his smile.

"since first year.... i guess im just not good at showing it." he sighed.

"dont mattheo , its my fault too , i was way too oblivious to your feeling and my own feelings . if i realised earlier then this wouldnt have happened-"

"wait. you....have feelings for me?" he asked with hope and desperation.

you paused before nodding , "if i hadnt liked you the whole time i wouldnt have continued to interact with you. i definetly wouldnt have let you hold my hand or my waist. i wouldnt have put in so much effort to get you back... i just didnt realise that througout this whole thing , you were the only person i tolerated teasing me for years."

he chuckled , "i wouldnt say tolerated , i ended up with a few bruisies."

you both laughed at this as he stood up , now towering over you, "im sorry for fighting cedric....and every guy who asked you out in the past."

"i always found it weird they ended up in the hospital wing and ghosting me the day after," you laughed.

he shrugged ,"i couldnt just watch you be with someone else, the thought of it literally tears me apart."

"yeah well youre not alone , remember when that ravenclaw girls hair turned neon yellow after you went on a date with her?" he nodded slowly , "yeah that was me."

he howled with laughter at your confession , remembering the scream of the girl when her hair transformed the day after his date with her.

"youre not alone either , i only went out with her to make you jealous," he confessed too.

"i knew ittt" you sang as he scoffed.

"no you didnt!"

"youre right i didnt," you shrugged.

once his laughter stopped he rested his hand on your cheek , "lets make a deal , no more pranks and no more fights."

you nodded.

"when youre angry with me just...kiss me" he said looking from your eyes to your lips as they pulled into a smile and crashed into his.

first year you is gagging in disgust.

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a-reverii · 4 months

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▸ REVERII'S DECEMBER FIC RECS

━━ ✰ THE WIZARDING WORLD.

sirius black

aren't promises meant to be broken? ⇢ @perpetuallydaydreaming

style. ⇢ @bealovesmarauders

his favorite neighbour. ⇢ @kquil

attention. ⇢ @/kquil

right where i want to be. ⇢ @appocalipse

the dark night. ⇢ @bruisedboys

oblivious. ⇢ @bitesizedgremlin

regulus black

hidden messages in foreign languages. ⇢ @applebutter-and-cinnamon

vivre d'amour et d'eau fraîche. ⇢ @/deactivated

his last letter. ⇢ @hamlets-ak

tricks and charms. ⇢ @curseofaphrodite

across the sea. ⇢ @/curseofaphrodite

the night we met. ⇢ @/curseofaphrodite

frosted practices. ⇢ @henqtic

remus lupin

by tired hands. ⇢ @luveline

skirts. @flwrbo

not so secret admirer. @/kquil

you're losing me. @astonishment

never his. @weasleykisses

wherever you stray i follow. @mediocre-daydreams

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urwhorecrux · 3 months

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Hii! Can I have Cedric body worshipping his shy fem s/o for the first time pls? 💗

love this idea <33

⋆ ˚⁀➷ ₊˚⊹⋆ soft - c.d

pairing. cedric diggory x fem!reader.

summary. first time with your boyfriend, cedric.

warnings. smut, praise kink, p in v, loss of virginity, established relationship.

word count. 916.

a/n. i wish i listened to the request a little bit more, i did first time + praise i hope that's alright? this is also the worst smut fic i've ever written.

You slightly nuzzled into Cedric's neck, slowly loosing you attention span as he went on rambling about his day and quidditch practice. It'd been a long cuddling session after school, a part of your daily routine with Cedric. Today's felt different, something lingered in the air around him, wanting more than to just be by him.

Without a second thought, you cupped his face gently, tilting his jaw to your face and closing the gap by connecting your lips.

He quickly was cut off from his rambling thoughts, now putting an arm around you as he pulled you in by your waist. Dating for a year had always been great, and more than healthy between you two-but you'd never done anything further than making out. Cedric understood you not wanting to rush, and to take things at a comfortable pace.

Now, the kiss was more than heated. your hands slid down his shirt, gently carresing his abs. before it could go further, he slowly pulled away, admiring you with glossy eyes.

"y/n.. I don't want to rush you or-" he was hesitant before you continued smashing his lips onto yours, cutting him off.

"I-i want this now ced, i trust you please.." you placed soft kisses across his jawline, a new and daring move for you.

"are you really sure though love?" he questioned, gently placing kisses across your forehead.

"yea," you nodded shyly, "i only want it to be you".

he gave in, slowly roaming his hands across your body, slowly leaning in capturing your lips, which were now both moving in sync.

he pulled away slowly, going down your neck, sucking gently leaving a small red ring around it. your cheeks slightly became flushed, in nervousness and excitement.

his hands move towards the hem of your shirt, unclasping your bra, discarding everything on the floor.

your hands naturally covered them, you cheeks began heating as you were now exposed for the first time around him.

"fuck baby- so beautiful f'me", "don't need to cover them, 's beautiful" he kissed your lips gently, continuing placing kisses down your breasts, sucking against them lightly while his other hand massages your other one.

"ced, just like that- feels so g-good" you giggle in between your moan, interlocking your hand across his messy hair.

he unlatched his mouth from your tit, pumping his cock that was causing a tent in his boxers, slowly revealing it leaking with precum.

he lets out throaty groans at the feeling of pumping his cock a few times before lining it at your entrance earning a gasp from you. you both felt connected, a new high of a feeling roamed throughout your body.

you dug your nails into his shoulders, nuzzling your face in his neck, shyly covering yourself.

"you alright baby?" he questioned, softly rubbing circles around your back.

"n-no ced don't stop please", you continued, shutting your eyes taking a breath.

"fuck, y'so beautiful baby, feels so good" he groaned.

he slowly let you adjust, groaning at the feeling of you walls clenching around him. you threw your head back in pleasure, as his cock pumped in and out slamming along your walls over again, making you mumble his name into his neck.

"ced-ced, feels so good" you moaned softly at the knot forming in your stomach, scratching his back firmly as he praised and placed kisses across your jawline.

"fuck baby- so tight fuck-" he groaned in your neck, pulsing his cock deeper inside you every second.

you suddenly screamed his name louder, almost louder than expected, him hitting your g-spot repeatedly.

"let it out baby, go ahead love" he circled your clit in eight figures, making your body shiver from the waves of pleasure.

you hid your face in his neck as you rode out your high with each other, his thrusts becoming sloppier as you felt his lips trembling.

"you're so beautiful baby, can't believe I have you all to myself love", he smashed his lips to yours, his cock trembling as it twitches inside you.

he slowly rested his head on your shoulder, panting softly coming down from his high, gently laying on top across your body.

"you alright love?' he smiles widely, gazing at you with soft eyes.

"y-yea ced, just really happy that you're my first" you reconnected your lips with his, interlocking arms before slowly falling to a deep sleep.

#harry potter #harry potter fluff #harry james potter #harry potter oneshot #cedric diggory x reader #harry potter smut #cedric diggory smut #cedric diggory imagine #cedric diggory fanfic #cedric diggory #cedric diggory x y/n smut #cedric diggory x y/n #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter series #harry potter smut imagine #cedric diggory fluff #cedric diggory angst #harry potter x reader

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mrsriddlenott · 9 months

Note

hi i saw your post about blurbs based on songs and i thought about a mattheo riddle x reader blurb inspired by everyone who falls in love by cian ducrot! maybe reader is a non-slytherin in a relationship with another non-slytherin but is secretly in love with mattheo. just an idea but can’t wait to see what you come up with <33

“Everyone Who Falls In Love Has Someone Else They’re Thinking Of”

I’d never heard this song before but I love it. As soon as I heard the lyrics I wanted Mattheo to be an ex, it’s not exactly what you asked for but I hope you like it. <3<3

Ex!Mattheo Riddle x Fem!reader

masterlist

Warnings: Angst, Emotional Cheating

Description: Reader’s trying to start anew with Cedric but Mattheo keeps popping into her head.

It never would have worked out in the long run. You’re a Hufflepuff he’s the son of the Dark Lord. You were just too incompatible. Your entire relationship was behind closed doors. You couldn’t have your house learning you were a traitor. It couldn’t have ever worked.

He’s just wrong for you.

At least thats what you kept repeating over and over in your head, but when he walked out of your life it hurt all the same. In all honesty you weren’t a traitor at all, he was nothing like what people thought and you knew that. But for some reason you just couldn’t voice that to people.

When Cedric came along everything clicked, it was so easy, so safe. He was enough. You couldn’t pass it up. You knew it hurt Mattheo to watch him give you everything he couldn’t, just as it hurt you. Every time his eyes caught yours it felt like a silent agreement that you still loved each other, but it wasn’t right. So you resisted.

But you couldn’t resist thinking of him in every moment you shared with Cedric. You couldn’t resist that part of you telling you Cedric was wrong, not Mattheo. The same part of you that was still in love with him, the part that had you following him down empty corridors even still.

“Haven’t you done enough Mattheo?” You shouted to his back as he stopped in front of you. You had just come from Potions where he made a point of showing off his jealousy every five minutes.

“I love him Mattheo, you cant just pop up everywhere an-“

“Everyone one who falls in love has someone else they’re thinking of,” he whirled around with narrowed eyes, “You can’t try and hide it because I know the feeling. I can see it and feel it every time you look at me,” He was now slowly stepping closer to you, with every step he took forward you took one backward.

“Thats why you lie to him about everything we ever did together, not because you’re ashamed, because you don’t want to admit you’re still in love with me.” You swallowed as you tried to think of something to say, he was right you knew he was, you just couldn’t admit it.

“I haven’t done enough y/n, it’ll never be enough to make up for this. I should have manned up and protected you myself. I didn’t want Him to hurt you, I didn’t want to lose you, I thought pushing you away would be easier to handle. As long as I knew you were alive. But I was a coward y/n, I see that now.” His voice caught in his throat as you stopped moving away from him allowing him to take your cheek into his hand, “I miss you, there I admitted it. Now please….come back to me.”

~~~~

#mattheo x y/n #mattheo riddle x reader #mattheo riddle #mattheo riddle angst #angst #cedric diggory #harry potter #hp #mattheo riddle x fem!reader #harry potter oneshot #harry potter angst #harry potter fandom

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destourtereaux · 11 months

Text

treat you better - cedric diggory x fem!reader (part 4: the finale)

read first: part 1, 2, 3 summary: all is well in love and friendship wc: 1.4k follow @lovebirdupdates to join my "taglist"

a/n: dear reader, thank you so much for following this series - i never imagined you would like it so much. i hope you enjoy this final fic, and please do reblog if yes! i’m sad to leave ceddie and harry, but i like how i've ended it :)

The morning after Cedric’s surprise party, you’re woken up by the soft sunlight streaming in through the huge windows of the Hufflepuff common room. Lifting your head up, you hear Cedric grumble, arms tightening around you. The scene feels so cozy that you don’t want to return to reality - but there’s a Herbology midterm coming up, and you’ve never been a natural at the subject, unlike a certain Hufflepuff. And so, you begin extricating yourself from Cedric’s embrace, which is no easy feat.

“How’s it feel to be seventeen, Ceddie?”

You get a groan in response.

“Alright, alright, then you stay put, but I’ve got to go study. I’m not a genius like you,” you tease, squirming in your efforts to slide out of his grasp.

“‘M not a genius, Y/N/N. You help me all the time. Don’t go, I know you’re ready for it, you don’t need anymore studying,” comes a sleepy protest.

“Mm… thank you for your confidence, but I assure you I am not in the least prepared. And what is all this bad advice coming from a prefect,” you raise an eyebrow, before finally slipping out of Cedric’s arms, and standing up immediately to avoid being pulled back in.

You feel the loss of Cedric’s warmth around your shoulders, and it weakens your resolve far more than it should, so you figure you need to leave as soon as possible, before grey eyes melt you into a puddle and back into his chest.

“Oh, fine. Leave me right after spending the night,” Cedric jokes, fully awake at last. He chuckles at the flush on your cheeks from this statement, and dodges your hit to his arm. “Just kidding, darling. Thank you for the party. Now go do what you have to do, I know you’re a busy girl.”

You smile softly, before tiptoeing up to ruffle his hair, and turn to leave. The gray eyes don’t leave you until you’re fully out of sight.

******

Climbing through the portrait hole, you see Ron and Harry sitting on the carpeted floor in front of the hearth, playing Wizard’s Chess, and Hermione engrossed in a book on the nearby couch. The scene is so familiar and comforting that it brings an involuntary smile to your face, before you wipe it off, the fight replaying in your head.

Ron is the first to see you, freezing mid-check, and gives a weak wave. Harry turns, and so does Hermione, with the former also stiffing up, and the latter offering a sweet smile. Hermione then looks back, and, finding the two boys silent, rolls her eyes, and jerks her head in your direction, glaring at them.

Spurned, Ron and Harry stand up, and walk over, looking so dejected that you almost feel sorry for them.

“Y/N - it’s nice to see you again,” Ron begins, his expression sheepish. Harry nods to echo the sentiment.

“We just wanted to apologize for that night. For the mean things we said. None of it was true, and it was of no fault on your end,” Ron confesses.

Your eyes soften, and give him a pat on the shoulder, “thanks Ronnie. And I expect you’ve said the same to ‘Mione?” giving him a pointed look, to which he nods fervently. At this, you offer a smile at last, and seeing this, Ron seems to realize he’s forgiven.

“I’ll give you two some space then,” he says, guiding Hermione away, and leaving Harry alone with you in the Gryffindor Common Room.

Harry gestures for you to sit, and the two of you settle in on the carpet.

“Y/N/N - I’m really, honestly sorry. I had no right to say what I said, and I’ve felt horrid about it every day since then. I know you’ll always have my back, and some Yule Ball date would never change that. I hope you’ll forgive me,” the black haired boy finally blurts, the words spilling out of him.

Your resolve crumbles. I mean, this is Harry. One of your best friends. You could never stay mad at him, no matter how much he messes up. It’s like he said: you have each other’s backs. So you lean forward and hug him, breathing in the smell of broom polish and treacle toffee that you had missed incredibly, feeling the boy physically relax into your touch.

“You really like him, don’t you?” Harry chimes, as you pull out of the hug.

“Yes, I do. And I hope you’re okay with that,” you share, crimson spilling onto your cheeks.

Harry nods, a grin spreading across his face, “I am, really. I know I acted in jealousy at the ball, but I don’t think I’ve ever actually felt romantically towards you - not that you’re unlikeable, you know, just -”

You laugh out loud, cutting him off, and offer a nod, “I get it, don’t stress yourself out, mate.”

He nods in relief, “you’re my best friend, Y/N/N, and that’s it. I love our relationship, and I do not want it to ever change.”

You nod, feeling better than you have in nearly a month.

Ron and Hermione choose that exact moment to enter the room, the guilt of eavesdropping written on their faces. But you’re far too happy to care - the gang’s back together.

******

Over the next month, life returns to normal, or rather, a new normal. Hermione is hanging out with Krum as much as possible, to make the most of their time together before the tournament ends and he returns to Durmstrang. You don’t see her nearly as much anymore, but it’s understandable.

Instead, you spend your days either studying out on the greens with Harry and Ron, or hanging out with Cedric, going to Hogsmeade’s various little cafes.

The second tournament task comes along, and you, Hermione, and Ron are pulled into the headmaster’s office then sent to the bottom of the Black Lake. When you awake, Cedric is treading water to keep the two of you above the lake, and you’re quickly pulled out and given a warm towel. Since Cedric finished first, the two of you rest in the champion seating section, and the boy keeps asking you if you’re okay, despite your fervent exclamations that you’re probably doing better than he is.

His friends soon surround him, arriving with endless teasing about how you’re the person “he’ll sorely miss,” and Cedric flushes scarlet at their words, refusing to meet your eyes. Eventually, he manages to shove them all away, and looks down to see you grinning.

“Ced, just so you know, I would’ve sorely missed you too,” you admit, before pressing a quick kiss to his lips.

Suddenly, Cedric could care less about his friends. He feels warm and dry and cozy, not a trace of the Black Lake’s eeriness on his mind.

******

A few weeks later, and it’s your birthday. Cedric had wracked his brain for ways to top your surprise party for him, and enlisted the help of the trio to do so. Hermione contributed all your likes and dislikes: she knew you like the back of her hand; Ron got Fred and George to put together a little sparkler show for you, and Harry was in charge of inviting all your closest friends.

The day of, you wake up to Cedric’s voice, before he gives you five minutes to pick an outfit, then promptly blindfolds you and leads you out to the courtyard, where the cutest picnic party had been set up. You laugh in delight, ecstatic, and after a quick kiss for Ced, rush over to meet up with your friends.

As you catch up over drinks with them, two boys, one Gryffindor, one Hufflepuff, are standing a distance away, both looking at you with slight smiles.

Soon, the sky is darkening and the party growing more and more uproarious. You spin around to see Harry and Cedric talking, and grin. Strolling over, you place an arm around each. Cedric kisses your hair, and you give Harry a tight hug.

“Thank you for all of this,” you say, “seriously. I’ve never been happier.”

Before they can reply: you were never one for cheesy emotions, you (forcibly) pull them toward the karaoke machine, where Ron and Hermione are singing their hearts out.

****** THE END! interested in my other works? see my masterlist!

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siriusly-parker · 2 years

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—random lightning era headcanons, hp.

ʚ author’s note: these are MY personal headcanons. you don’t have to like them, but maybe you will. also- i KNOW mattheo and enzo are not even canon and that theo is hardly even mentioned but i thought it’d be cute to add them. mainly theo cause i love fanon theo (sometimes). ꜝꜞ

ron is super mega tall, taller than the twins. maybe even taller than bill.

harry is of average height but looks like a short king besides ron.

theo is basically a grumpy old man in the body of a teenage heartthrob.

blaise is just a sweetheart. fr the bestest friend.

draco can’t read in between the lines. he’s book smart but when it comes to people and social interactions he can be pretty stupid. you can’t just give him a hint, he won’t get it.

hermione actually really liked krum.

harry actually attended theo’s mother’s funeral. (they were on somewhat friendly terms after having to team up for an assignment.)

ginny likes girls. dean likes seamus. both knew.

draco, mattheo and enzo (along with crab and goyle) are more of the bullies of the group.

angelina and george are part of a tutoring program and tutor younger students. though he’s really good in potions, george only does it to spend time with her.

ron secretly tries to read muggle books to impress hermione.

mattheo is just plain rude with anger issues. he pretty much hates everyone.

theo is just more of an introvert so he doesn’t really feel the need to talk to everyone, let alone bully them.

blaise is not very smart but he really tries his best and studies a lot. he also reminds (or forces) the others to study as well.

in her firsts years at hogwarts, pansy was mostly a bitch and a bully (to impress malfoy), but blaise became a good influence and she learned to mind her own business a bit more.

ron had ALWAYS had a crush on hermione. he just didn’t want to.

neville had a secret girlfriend around year 3-4 and they’d always meet in the herbology greenhouse.

oliver suffers from insomnia which sometimes leads to him being rude during morning practices and even having anger outbursts towards his last hogwarts years.

fred is really really good with kids while george just doesn’t really know what to do with them.

cedric has dyslexia and really finds it difficult and discouraging to read and study. cho and harry are one of the few who know and help him with homework.

luna randomly takes walks in the forbidden forest. she finds it peaceful.

mattheo is naturally really smart. he never studies and always gets good grades. he’s kind of a dick about it.

seamus has ADHD and had a mild ODD as a child

cho is extremely interested in politics and even founded a secret debate club at hogwarts.

dean is the only one who knows about seamus’ breakdowns and the only one who truly knows how to help him.

angelina is really popular. there is nothing to hate about her. she is beautiful and kind and especially good at quidditch.

krum was really bummed out to leave hogwarts. he was actually liking it there. mainly the people. mainly hermione. just hermione tbh.

spending summer ‘94 with hermione was ginny’s gay awakening confirmation.

▾

꩜ i siriusly love you <3

꩜ hp tags: @ateliefloresdaprimavera @marvelismylifffe @hi-there-x @koreandrama-crazyyyy @df841 @hanniejji @streetghostfighter07 @agustdpeach @littlebrownngirl @emcchi @siriuslysirius1107 @wwhitewwolff @underthelee @florenceivy @guidetothesuperlame @littlebirdgot @koreandrama-crazyyyy @rororo06 plz tell me if you’d like to be added or removed!! you can ask for a specific fandom or character or my whole blog <333

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shychick-52 · 5 months

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So, you can't tell me Roland didn't blame Cedric for being unable to save his first wife when she had complications from giving birth to the twins (he probably tried a potion or spell, but it was likely too late). I imagine that must have caused an even greater rift between them.

And it's also a big reason Cedric hates being compared to his own father, who saved Roland's dad's life nine-and-a-half times. In 'Cedric's Apprentice', he says to Sofia bitterly "I've never saved anyone's life, not even a half." And then in 'Mystic Meadows', Cedric had to listen while Goodwyn bragged to Sofia about how many times he saved her grandfather, which likely triggered Cedric about how he failed to save the former queen.

I can see Cedric feeling genuinely guilty he couldn't save the first queen, and not just because he's so desperate for recognition and to be seen as useful- but also because of the part of him that still saw Roland as his friend and cared about him.

I know it's a Disney Jr. show, but it would have been really interesting to have that explored more. Oddly enough, I haven't seen it addressed much in the fandom, including fics.

In fact, I can see the twins' birthday an incredibly sad day for Cedric, and very bittersweet for Roland.

@bettathanyou

#Yay Cedric angst!#cedric the sorcerer #cedric the great #sofia the first #character analysis

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perciver4ever · 5 months

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I knew my heart couldn't take angst and yet I still read it. Now I'm internally sobbing because of a fanfic where Percy and Oliver attends Cedric's funeral.

#percy weasley #oliver wood #perciver #percy x oliver #cedric diggory #harry potter fandom #angst #cedric diggory's funeral #cedric thinks of percy as an older brother #sobbing #i love them so much

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btsbabe7 · 6 months

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November Prompt 5: Cuddle

Words: 401 | Pairing: Neville Longbottom x reader

You step into the warmth of your boyfriend’s room, freshly showered and clothed in your loose pajama shorts, cropped tank and long cardigan. You hadn’t expected dinner to turn into a sleepover, but when he’d finally worked up the nerves to ask after three nights of dinner together, you couldn’t say no.

A few candles are lit on top of his Herbology and Potions books that take up the entirety of his nightstand. His burgundy blankets are tossed back, revealing the golden sheets he was gifted with as a reward from Professor Sprout for his selection as Head Boy just before the break. And he sits against his wooden headboard, a plaid brown shirt clinging to his newly discovered muscles, his brown hair combed perfectly across his head, and his green eyes on you in the dim light.

You slowly waltz towards the bed, smiling as he readjusts under the golden sheets to make room for you.

“What about the candles?” You ask while eyeing them in proximity to his blankets.

“They’re flameless,” Neville reassures before you climb next to him.

You hum in amazement, only used to the flaming candles that hung overhead in The Great Room back at school.

“Thanks for dinner and for letting me stay.”

He grins nervously, taking your hand in his before giving it a small squeeze. You can tell he’s nervous again. You know it’s been hard for him to return home during the break with the recent passing of his parents, let alone letting someone else in afterwards.

“Nev,” you breathe and thumb over his grasp before leaning into his shoulder.

His head leans against your damp hair and you can feel him trembling against you. He’s never cried in your presence, but you’ve caught him more teary eyed in the recent days. And you react in the same way you’d want if the roles were reversed; you sit up and wrap your arms around him instead.

Neville sinks down under the weight of the burgundy blankets and cuddles against your waist, wrapping his arms around you as his tears burn against the bare flesh of your thighs.

“I’m here for you, always. I promise you don’t have to do this alone,” you whisper while gently stroking your fingertips through his course hair until his sobbing fades into soft sniffles, then into gentle snores that eventually lull you to sleep against his headboard.

Please be sure to check out my other latest fics:

⚡︎ November Prompt Challenge (days 1-30)

⚡︎ For You Always - reader x Snape

~ Navi: masterlist (all fandoms) & (bts imagines/drabbles)

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction, but please don’t copy! Written purely for fun :) Please only repost to other socials w/my permission and credit! Reblogging w/credit is fine. Thank you! ♡

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a-reverii · 3 months

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▸ REVERII'S JANUARY FIC RECS

━ THE WIZARDING WORLD.

sirius black

love was out to get me. ⇢ @cauliflowertree

napkins. ⇢ @crazyk-imagine

gossip. ⇢ @/crazyk-imagine

my heart won't start anymore, for you. ⇢ @curseofhecate

late night kisses. ⇢ @spaceagebachelormann

gorgeous. ⇢ @cassiopeiasdaughter

wish you were sober. ⇢ @starstruckmoony

regulus black

he loves you. ⇢ @cryonme

rescue you. ⇢ @thebrunettemuse

what once was. ⇢ @patrophthia

how to get the girl. ⇢ @/patrophthia

willow. ⇢ @/patrophthia

idiots to lovers. ⇢ @/patrophthia

in another life, perhaps. ⇢ @fourmoony

remus lupin

calm after the storm. ⇢ @earthgirl616

furry little secret. ⇢ @/earthgirl616

the girl with the books. ⇢ @solemnarration

if it wasn't for you meddling kids. ⇢ @writesowhatnext

'til the morning. ⇢ @upsidedownwithsteve

at ease. ⇢ @/upsidedownwithsteve

closure. ⇢ @vqlluna

james potter

on the house. ⇢ @astonishment

why did she say yes? ⇢ @/astonishment

i guess i thought i would be harder for you to let me go. ⇢ @morwap

breakup with your girlfriend, i'm bored. ⇢ @siriusmydeer

━━ ( navigation ) ( masterlist ) ( request )

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itstheghostofmypast · 8 months

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🌻Imperfections🌻

Draco malfoy x (f)Reader (Hufflepuff)

Summary: Perfection is what defined those who were above the rest- yet, she could not be part of the perfection that defined him. Defined his society and very presence- defined her own family but not her. She was the imperfection within his world of perfection, the bright sun in his cool, pale blue sky. For even if she was the warm sun, he was nothing more than the silver moon- both destined to live in the same sky but never together.

Genre: Fluff, Angst

AU: NO VOLDEMORT - Plus Cedric is vibing, I'm sorry he's too precious.

Warnings: None

Part- 3/?

Masterlist/ Previous

Did he accept her for who she was? What did that even mean? What did he mean- no, what was he trying to imply? The series of questions raced across her mind, bouncing off one wall to the other as she stomped up to the astronomy tower, wanting to be alone with her insistent, horrid thoughts.

With a loud slam, she barged into what she expected to be a vacant room, only to lock eyes with cold crystals, swirling with unspoken emotion. Her first reaction was to throw something at him, preferably her bag, but she knew better than that- for the past month, he had been avoiding her, rendering her feelings void- feeling? What kind of feelings did she even have for him? Were they really even considered feelings, if they were just "close acquaintances"? Or perhaps her foolish little heart had led her to believe the time he had spent with her was not a way of entertaining his boredom- perhaps she was a form of jester in his eyes. Really? Did she really think the prince of Slytherin would be interested in her? Let alone want to befriend her? A soul so wretched and stained that her own family would pray for her disappearance, her own family denied her existence, her own mother telling her that she "can not love her".

This is why she stood there staring at him, wondering why he was even here, was he here for her or was this by chance- was fate once again, tugging at the strings of her heart, waiting for the remaining threads to rip apart? Swallowing her insecurities she cleared her throat, mustering up the courage to give him a small smile, "Hello, haven't seen you in a while."

Her gesture was returned with a blank stare, only for her to frown and walk closer, stopping right in front of him, looking up at him with a pleading look, wanting him to say something, anything, even a sentence would do. This was no longer about how she felt, but whether Cedric was right or wrong. She believed that he was different, at least not like the rest of the people in her life, those who had cast her out, she had seen the different side of him, so she wasn't going to let him slip away without an explanation.

Truth be told he wasn't expecting her here tonight, he'd been coming to the tower on alternate days, knowing she wouldn't be there when he would, that's the extent he had gone to, just to avoid her. Why? because he was a coward, there was no way in hell he would look her dead in the eye and tell her he wanted nothing to do with her.

Sighing he looked away, choosing to move past her, only to freeze when her fingers wrapped around his cold wrist, head whipping in her direction, eyes burning with rage, how dare she touch him? How dare she make it harder for him, than it already was. A powerful, gruesome phrase that was about to slip off his tongue clung onto the tip of his tongue as his eyes met her glossy gaze, one that looked so soft and meek, compared to the death grip she had on his wrist.

"Please, am I that unbearable?"

With a defeated sigh, he turned around, wrapping his hand around hers, slowly peeling off her fingers, "Don't make this harder for both of us. Y/N, if I could, I would've pushed you away the day I saw you."

"But-"

"Shhh..." he let go of her hand to place a finger on her lips, "Please, I am begging you to stop." he whispered, looking into her eyes as they pierced through his soul. It was moments like these that forced his world to a halt, one so bitter-sweet that it made his fingers tingle and mind buzz as if he were hexed by her, forcing him to succumb to her. The two stared at each other for what felt like an eternity, the universe around them still as ever, If that were true, he would've given up on her at that very moment, but regretfully it was not, time never stopped for anyone and the universe never left anyone alone; not a noble heir like him nor a cursed, unwanted noble like her, they had their own baggage and he wasn't sure if he was willing to share, especially with her, he never wanted to be part of those who added to the weight on her shoulders- yet fate seemed to be against them both.

"Why?"

She broke the silence, taking a step forward, almost closing the gap between them, only for him to take one bag, reestablishing the distance.

She stepped forward once more,

"I thought we could be friends?"

He took one back, they're words now synchronized with their movements,

"You thought wrong."

"Is it because I'm a Hufflepuff?"

"No."

"Because I'm an outcast?"

"No."

"Because I hit Zabini?"

"No"

"Then?"

"Because-" His words came to an abrupt stop, his back touching the cold stone wall, eyebrows raised in surprise at her persistence. This was new. He wasn't used to her like this, so persistent, so determined to win, finding answers, like a child willing to touch fire just to feel it. Just like that, she was mere centimeters away from him, now in his personal space, a space not even his friends were invited into, yet, here they stood, eyes locked, breaths mingling, basking in each other's warmth.

"Because?" a whisper slipped past her lips, eyes darting down to how inviting they looked. What would they taste like? What would she taste like? His fingers twitched in anticipation, waiting for his brain to let his guard down, to let loose, but Draco Malfoy never let his guard down, never let loose for anyone or anything- but was she just anyone?

He had noticed how during his period of "Avoiding the Pesky Puff" - as Zabini would call it- he had begun to notice her even more, registering the tiniest of details about her. From how her doe eyes would frantically scan the hall, in search of something or someone, probably him, only for her lips to form a small pout in defeat when she couldn't. He noticed how she would use that little diary of hers more than usual, making him wonder about how many things had been bothering her for so long- was he not a part of them? His eyes would often aimlessly spot her in the field as they waited for their turn, watching her play with her team, effortlessly keeping, or sometimes (more often than less) doing laps around the field, cursing up at her captain who'd usually ignored her. He wasn't sure if the others on his team noticed the newfound source of interest of their captain, but now and then he'd feel Zabini bump their shoulders, mumbling, "Mate, avoiding her doesn't mean drooling at the sight of her." This would often earn a low growl, followed by a "Sod off". Since he was no longer tutoring her, she would now be tutored by Diggory, much to his displeasure. Since their lesson had been cut short, thanks to Zabini, he had never heard her laugh like that, or hear her whine about wanting to end the session early or when she'd start a pointless conversation to waste time, perhaps they could've had meaningful conversations together- unlike the ones she'd usually have with Diggory.

"Cedriiiiiic"

"Hmm?"

"Don't you think a chocolate salad would be a good business idea?"

"I think you finishing this chapter would be an even better one."

"Yes, but if it's successful, then I wouldn't have to waste time on this."

"Yet, here you are."

"Because I like you", the words left him faster than his thoughts could rearrange themselves, eyes scanning her face for any kind of expression, though her face was void of any emotion, a dull silence settling in, his confession hanging in the air.

"But, you can't...right?"

Her question caught him off guard, if the ground would swallow him whole right now, he would've let it, doing anything but answering the question that had come after his confession.

"I..."

"It's okay." She beamed up at him, a dry chuckle following after, "You aren't the first person who can't like me...my own mother can't love me, my father can't accept me for who I am- why would you be any different?" placing a hand on his chest, she sighed, he wasn't sure about her, but the moment he felt her palm on his heart, he felt his skin light up, heart slamming against the ribcage, wanting to settle on her palm, all snug.

"It's amusing how people I know have hearts so warm and alive, yet, you all act like they're made of stone." Pulling her hand away she sighed, taking a step back , glancing away from him, mumbling to herself, "I really must be cursed."

"Y/N, wait-" reaching out to her, the tips of his fingers barely grazing her arm before grasping at nothing, his heart sinking at the sight of her dejected being.

Taking another step back, she shook her head, arms wrapping around herself, trying to compose herself before looking at him with a smile, one that pierced through his heart. "It's okay Draco, I'm used to it. That's why I just wanted to befriend you- but I guess I forgot where I actually belong."

Say something!?

He stood there, taking in her image, their little bubble slowly cracking- why? Why did he say that to her? Insulting her would've been much better than this alternate excuse of "It's not you it's me". And here she was again, smiling at him like nothing had happened, like he hadn't just plucked out her heart, like a budding sunflower in a field of weeds, only to rip it out and throw it into a sack of trash.

Before his short-circuited brain formed a sentence, he was once again left speechless when he heard her, as she stood by the door,

"I'm sorry for being such a burden, I'll make sure to set things the way they were before."

It was only when he heard the soft click of the door did his world came shattering down on him, Why did he feel this way this is what he had been trying to achieve for so long? Didn't he tell Zabini he was doing this to protect her? Then wasn't this noble of him? No, it wasn't for he had made it even worse for her, leading her on, pulling her to the edge then pushing her off, watching her fall into an abyss, being one of the many on the list of people who had abandoned her.

Running his fingers through his hair he let out a shaky breath, nodding to himself, This was it, it was finally over, he could move on and eventually so would she, after all....she had Diggory. Fixing his robes he walked over to the door only to stop at something small that caught his eye, something he probably dropped on the way out. Crouching down to grab it, he inspected the small diary, noticing how it was more filled than he had seen last time. Sighing, he put it in his pocket, with no plans of returning it to her, nor to this place anymore, though he had a feeling she wouldn't come here again either.

As he settled down on his bed he felt the all too familiar despair settle around him, hand going to his pocket, taking out the small diary, flipping through the pages, noticing the blotches of dried water, the ridges of the paper denting, dried ink that had probably begun to seep through the pages with the water- tears perhaps. He shouldn't, this was personal, it was hers, hers to use, hers to burn, but all logic went out the window as his eyes fixated on a specific name, his name.

"Draco."

This was going to be a long night.

A/N: I hope you liked reading this, please show some love if you did. If you want to be part of my Draco fics taglist, feel free to dm me.

Tag list:

@spphrj

@jensfraise

@dramatic-long-coats

@m00nie-m00

@iellasgrave

@danywonderland

@whiterain1997

@writerwriteswriting

@hearmyharmony

@ruethemazerunner

@missstratford

#draco malfoy #draco x y/n #draco imagine #draco fanfiction #draco fluff #draco x reader #hufflepuff #slytherin x hufflepuff #harry potter #harry james potter #cedric deserved better #fluff and angst #series #draco x hufflepuff!reader #fem reader #hufflefluff #draco lucius malfoy #draco fic #howgwards

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roonilwazlibimagines · 8 months

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all too well - c.d x female reader

Blurb: literally just all too well by taylor swift; young reader x older cedric Word Count: 14.7k Warnings: cedric's an ass, i did a lot of editing but i haven't looked at this in like a year A/N: what if i told you i started this the week after red (tv) release #oopsies #iwasnevergoingtoproofreadthisagainsoifiguredishouldjustpostit #ihaveinspiraitontowrite #howdowefeelaboutfratboyregulus #howdowefeelaboutmeselfprojecting

Masterlist

An Upstate Escape

It was my first year of Hogwarts when I first saw Cedric Diggory and, even if I didn’t necessarily believe it, the first thought that came to my mind was that one day he would be mine. It was a far stretch because while I was in my first year he was in his last and ready to graduate from Hogwarts. But it didn’t matter because really, it was just a silly schoolgirl crush.

Cedric Diggory was the golden boy. Quite literally. He had all the best attributes of a great Hufflepuff: he was Head Boy and captain of Hufflepuff’s Quidditch team, he was top of his year academically, and while he managed to accomplish all of that, he competed in the Triwizard Tournament and won.

This reputation definitely didn’t help my crush. It only made me want him more. Subconsciously, I think it made me feel that if I ever was to have a chance with him I needed to be just as golden as him. So I became the golden girl. I was top of my class academically, I was head girl and I already had a job as a junior healer lined up for me after Hogwarts. Cedric had his own reputation and now I had mine. It crossed my mind, one random afternoon during my last few days of Hogwarts that I finally felt like I was on the same level as Cedric Diggory.

Not that I had seen him since my last day of my first year. But I was still aware that he was golden. He was a famous Quidditch player which was one of the few things I lacked in comparison to him. Quidditch was never my strong suit, but I was happy to watch the game and I knew I would turn back into my first year old self if I ever got to see him play again.

He seemed untouchable now, with his elite status, but for some reason, I just knew that someday our paths would cross again.

And they did. The week after I had finished Hogwarts. I was out celebrating with my friends at a pub in Diagon Alley and even in the dark light I could recognise the familiar golden brown curls at the bar and I suddenly decided that I was thirsty. Offering to buy the next round I made my way up to the bar, pulling my skirt down and fixing my hair as I did so. I stood right next to him and leant over the bench so the bartender could hear me, forcing myself not to look at him.

I could feel his eyes on me and it gave me a confidence boost that I didn’t need. When I finished my order I stood back up straight, pretending to let my eyes search the room before landing on the man beside me.

“Hi,” he smirked, angling his body to face me. He was sitting on a stool and I had to look up at him.

“Hi,” I responded, smiling up at him and tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, “Cedric Diggory, right?” The words escaped my mouth before I could think them through. Great. He was probably going to think I was some crazy fan who stalked him.

“You’re a fan?” Of course. He cocked an eyebrow at me as he took a sip of his drink and I chuckled.

“Sort of.” I was already slightly tipsy and feeling a bit too confident as I continued, “I was in my first year of Hogwarts when you graduated.” He nodded slowly and I wondered if he was doing the maths in his head.

“And you’ve been keeping up with me ever since?” There was a teasing glint in his eye as he went back to smirking and I laughed again.

“Something like that,” I mumbled, just as my drinks were placed in front of me. Both of our eyes fell on them and when I went to grab them he spoke again.

“So, you know who I am, tell me,” he paused, “what’s your name, pretty girl?” I almost dropped the drinks at his words and I think he noticed because he let out a low chuckle that was hard to hear with the music playing so loud.

When I told him my name he repeated it as if he was testing it out in his mouth and he smiled as if he enjoyed the new taste. I smiled up at him, suddenly unsure what was going to happen next and fearing that this would be the last time I spoke to Cedric Diggory.

“Well,” he thankfully continued, repeating my name once more, “I usually come here after Quidditch practice so maybe I’ll see you around?” He repeated his actions; lifting an eyebrow at me and sipping whatever was in his drink.

Smirking, I replied, “maybe you will,” and I walked away, my heart pounding as I tried to hide the grin on my face.

I didn’t want to be distracted by Cedric Diggory the whole night so I made a conscious effort not to look back at the bar, but it was torture. When we finished our round of drinks I allowed myself to glance back over to the bar and even if I wanted to turn away the second I saw Cedric Diggory already looking at me I forced myself to keep eye contact and gave him a flirty smile.

He seemed to like it because he smiled back and winked at me before downing his drink. I turned back around and let myself enjoy the way my heart fluttered.

~~~

The morning after I realised that I was in a trap. Firstly I wasn’t sure when Cedric had Quidditch practice, but that was an easy fix, surely one of my friends who were into Quidditch would know. The second issue was what did I do once I found out? Did I go there after his next Quidditch practice or would that seem too desperate? But if I didn’t go straight away and waited then I ran the risk of him finding someone else to flirt with. Then, of course, the self doubt crept in and for a few seconds I wondered if he even meant that he wanted to see me again. He was a famous Quidditch player. Surely he could have any girl he wanted.

I didn’t like chasing, there was too much thinking involved. But then I just had to remember how golden he still looked with his hair done perfectly and his eyes still gleaming and his confident demeanour and suddenly, I decided not to think too hard about it and went to find out when their next practice was.

The Quidditch season was ending soon meaning his team was practising religiously to ensure they had a prime opportunity to make it to the finals. I pretended to be interested when my friend told me all this hoping that when it would, undoubtedly, be brought up in conversation with Cedric I wouldn’t look like a complete fool. They figured out I was asking this for help with a boy but I didn’t tell them who it was. Not that I was embarrassed by Cedric or my crush on him, but I didn’t want to look like an idiot if nothing came out of it.

They trained Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays according to my friend and so I decided that Friday would be the best night to go. It was about a week since I first saw him so it didn’t look like I had rushed to find him and going out on a Friday night out was normal so it wouldn’t seem like I showed up just for him.

~~~

I realised I got there probably a bit too early because there was barely anyone in there. It was dark and the music was just starting to get louder. I sat myself on one of the stools at the bar, hoping that he would eventually show. I got a drink to calm my nerves and hopefully give me some confidence and I sipped it slowly so it wouldn’t immediately go to my head.

As I ordered a second drink I heard someone call my name and my head immediately snapped to find someone taking the seat next to me.

“Cedric,” I smiled, noticing that there were a few more people now in the pub.

“I’m glad you made it,” he smiled and I decided to act coy.

“Me too, did you have practice today?” I queried, thanking the bartender as I started sipping my new drink.

“I did, it was bloody horrendous today,” he mumbled before ordering a drink for himself.

“You must be training to get into the finals,” I commented, feeling proud of myself for relaying the information I had learnt last week.

“Yeah,” he sighed, his hands resting on his thighs, “we are. Are you a Quidditch fan?” I tensed up not exactly knowing what my next move should be. I wasn’t, but would he lose interest in me if I told him that?

“Of the sorts.” I went with, but immediately regretted it when I realised it made me sound lame. No one says that. He only nodded before taking a sip of his drink.

“So, tell me, what do you do?” I subconsciously sat up a bit straighter, proud to tell anyone my current occupation.

“I’m just starting as a junior healer at St. Mungo’s.” He gave me a surprised look and replied, “impressive.” I hoped it was. Surely a soon to be healer was on a similar level as a professional Quidditch player, right?

We spent the rest of the night talking and getting to know each other. He even gave me his personal insight into some of the tasks he had to do at the Triwizard Tournament and the whole night I was hanging onto each and every word that left his mouth. I was in awe of the man who really lived up to his reputation and was nothing short of golden and I was happy to hear all about him.

When it started getting late and the music seemed to die down I started to fear what would happen next.

“It has been lovely talking to you,” he said before finishing the drink in his hand, “I would love to keep this conversation going but maybe next time we could talk over dinner instead of drinks?” It took everything I had not to start squealing and shouting ‘yes!’. I instead cleared my throat to give me some time to relax before replying, “that sounds great.”

~~~

So the next week we were at a new restaurant outside Diagon Alley and Cedric was telling me about his training routine for his upcoming Quidditch game next week. It was a restaurant I had never heard of and there was barely anyone inside at this late hour, but I wondered if the few people in there could tell that I was completely enamoured by him and the way he spoke.

That night, despite the small crowd, I got a message from my friend alerting me of the ‘breaking news’ that Cedric Diggory had been spotted with a girl and could potentially be off the market.

‘Remember when you used to have a crush on him?’

For some reason I felt like I wasn’t meant to tell her that the mystery girl was me. Had Cedric told anyone? We had organised another dinner, this time at his house and I wondered if these locations had been specifically chosen to prevent the media from finding out more.

‘Worst news of my life’ I responded, hoping the conversation would end there.

After a few more dinners - which were never explicitly called ‘dates’, but I was confident were - Cedric said, “I really like talking to you.”

We were in another empty restaurant outside Diagon Alley and I beamed at him.

“I really like talking to you,” I giggled and he let out a breathy chuckle.

“You know,” he paused, “I’ve never met anyone like you.” My heart was pounding as I hung on his every word. “It feels like I’ve known you forever, you’re so mature for your age.” I wasn’t sure what to say but I thought it was a nice compliment so I looked down, hoping it came off as bashful. “Do you maybe want to come watch my game this weekend?”

He said I could bring a few of my friends and I, of course, accepted. I couldn’t remember if I had any plans that weekend, but I was more than happy to cancel them because going to the game would mean that people would see me.

The media knew that Cedric was seeing the same girl a couple of nights each week, but they didn’t know who the girl was, but going to his Quidditch game would make it official.

I hadn’t spoken about this with Cedric because I was scared he was going to think I was using him for fame or money or whatever it was, but it was obvious he wanted the same thing and had never been happier.

~~~

“Cedric Diggory?” One of my friends asked as I told them about how I had seen him that night we went out and how we had been meeting up since meaning I was the girl in that article.

“Yeah,” I said, “he was in his last year when we started, he is a professional Quidditch player?” I asked, dumbfounded that they were asking about him as if they didn’t know him.

“I know who he is,” they rolled their eyes at me, “he’s just kinda old.” They shrugged and I felt hot at the comment. I wanted to ask what the big deal was. We both enjoyed hanging out with each other, we were both adults. There was nothing wrong. But before I could speak another one of my friends chimed in.

“So are you like,” they paused, “dating?” We hadn’t said. The answer was therefore no, but I felt foolish telling them that. They were making this out to be a much bigger deal than it originally was and I was sad because I was no longer excited about asking them to the game.

“Well, we haven’t said we are officially dating,” I spoke slowly, “but surely he doesn’t ask every girl he meets to come to his Quidditch games, right?” They shrugged in response and I wished that, whether they believed it or not, they would have agreed with me.

~~~

I had bought his team's scarf and had my hair tied up in a scrunchie with his team's colours and we were sitting at the top of the stadium where Cedric had bought our tickets. I cheered for him when he came out and I cheered for him when he caught the snitch and they won the game. I was feeling giddy for him and for some reason I had never felt so nervous when I waited for him to come out of the locker rooms.

“Congratulations,” I smiled when he came out, his teammates trailing behind him.

“You stayed back.” One of his teammates nudged him in the side before chuckling and walking away but my focus was entirely on him.

“Of course,” I chuckled, bouncing on my heels.

“Thanks,” he mumbled and brought me in for a hug, pressing the faintest kiss to the top of my head. I felt his chest rise and fall and I wondered if he was exhausted after a long match.

“Listen,” he started, “we’re going out to celebrate tonight, but maybe tomorrow we can go out and do our own celebrating?” He pulled back and rose his eyebrow suggestively at me.

“Sounds good,” I whispered and feeling bold I leant in and pressed a kiss to his cheek, “see you then.” I started walking past him, heading over to my friends who had given us our space.

I heard one of his friends laugh and ask, “was that your girlfriend, Ced?” but I was too far away to hear his reply. I wondered if he would make it official tomorrow night.

He would have to, right? We had been to dinner countless times and he had kissed me in front of his teammates. Well maybe it wasn’t a proper kiss, but it was something. He asked me to his game and he still wanted to see me afterwards so surely I wasn’t naive to think that he would ask me to be his girlfriend, right?

Well maybe I was naive enough to think that he would, because he didn’t.

We were back at his house and he was talking so quickly I could barely keep up, but I didn’t want him to think I was uninterested so I kept an interested look on my face.

“And then I was sure that I was going to be hit by the bludger, but as you saw I moved away just in time, but then I wasn’t sure where the snitch went and I was sure the other seeker was just about to grab it, but-” I reacted at all of the right places, but for some reason my heart was in my throat.

I knew we had only been talking for a short while, but I had feelings for Cedric Diggory and I wasn’t sure what I was going to do with myself if he didn’t reciprocate them.

I was so caught up in my thoughts that I barely noticed when he stopped talking, until he took a bite of his food and pointed at me before saying, “That’s cute.”

He was referring to his team's scarf that I had foolishly worn to dinner. I wasn’t sure why I wore it again. I had bought it just for the match and if I was being honest it was out of my budget. Apparently Quidditch merchandise is not in a financially struggling junior healer in training’s price range. I guess I just didn’t want it to be a waste of money.

“Thanks,” I looked down at my food, “I’ve had it for ages.” I mumbled, not really wanting him to know that I bought it just for the match.

He kept telling me stories about the team, what they got up to last night celebrating and when his next match would be.

“It’s nice, just to be in private, don’t you think?” he asked after finishing a story about his friend who got so drunk that night he spliced himself.

“You must get a lot of unwanted attention in public.” I took a sip of the water and he leant back on the bench across from me. I was weary of this conversation. Nothing had come from the media about me being at his game. Apparently they didn’t stay for the players to come out at the end of the game, so Cedric Diggory was still taken by some mystery girl.

I wasn’t sure why I was so caught up on this, I guess a part of me wanted to be public so it would feel real.

“Yeah, it gets hard sometimes,” he sighed, “you think you’re living a normal life but then it’s on the front page of the newspaper and suddenly everyone has an opinion.”

I guess it made sense. He obviously wanted to take things slow because of this privacy issue, but I was certain that one day we would take the next step.

And I was feeling pretty confident about it too when I was standing in his doorway, ready to apparate back home when he called out my name and grabbed onto my waist, bringing me closer to him and pressing his lips against mine. I smiled into the kiss and brought my hands onto his chest to steady myself from the sudden movement. He pulled away and I knew I was smiling like an idiot.

“See you next week?” he asked, and I beamed.

“Of course.”

When I got home I realised that I had left my scarf at his house but that was the least of my concerns because all I could focus on was the feeling of him on my lips and the excitement of a new relationship beginning and all I could do was close my eyes and focus on my breathing so I didn’t pass out.

The First Crack in The Glass

Cedric and I had been going out for over a month now and we were settling into our relationship. If that’s what we were calling it. I was unsure because we had never spoken about it explicitly. It did frustrate me, but I was so happy to be with him and I didn’t want to push him in a direction he didn’t want to go in, so I tried not to think about it.

I hoped that he would extend that favour to me as well. Cedric had invited me to one of the training sessions and it was here where the media finally got the winning shot of Cedric walking over to me sitting in the stands. It didn’t take long before people found out it was me and even though Cedric hadn’t brought it up, I wondered if he was as happy as I was that our love was there for the world to see.

Since our relationship had received a bit of attention from the media, we now had most of our dates at his house. Now that people knew we were together, media outlets seemed to be following our every move and it was frustrating having to use back exits and going out in inconspicuous clothing. I didn’t think Cedric really liked all the attention our relationship was getting. He would always get quiet when there were people waiting outside to take our photos and I would always find papers with our photo on them torn up in his bin.

Which I was noticing a lot more now that we were spending more time at his house.

But I wasn’t complaining about it because it gave us plenty of opportunities to make out.

Cedric’s lips were soft and his touch was sure. Sometimes it made me feel a bit insecure because he obviously had experience whereas I had only had a few pathetic ‘pecks’ during school.

But I had other things to worry about. Sometimes Cedric would get a bit handsy and I’d have to awkwardly make an excuse and remove myself from the situation. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy his touch, he was obviously skilled and I enjoyed it thoroughly, but I just wasn’t ready to take it to the next step.

I hadn’t done anything like that with another person and while it had crossed my mind that I wouldn’t mind doing it with Cedric, I just wasn’t ready to give that up when I wasn’t even sure if we were officially dating.

Tonight I was meeting his friends for the first time. They mainly consisted of the people he played Quidditch with as well as a few others who were in his year at Hogwarts. It was a celebration for his team who had made it to the finals and even though I still needed it explicitly said, the fact that he had chosen me to accompany him made me feel like we were official.

“You look divine,” Cedric murmured, making his way over to me and placing his hands on my hips. He brought his head down to mine and he pressed a kiss to the outside of my ear making me giggle.

“Thanks,” I mumbled, “I’m not going to lie, I’m a little nervous.” He pulled away from me. We were outside his doorway, my arms were wrapped around my chest in the cool night air and I was glad that his porch light was dim because I could barely see his face and I hoped it was the same for him.

“Why?” His eyebrow furrowed in confusion and put a hand on my upper arm.

“I don’t know,” I murmured, trying not to meet his gaze, “it’s just nerve wracking meeting new people.” He didn’t respond and so I continued. “I really want to make a good impression on your friends, you know? They’re obviously important to you and I don’t want them to hate me.” “Why would they hate you?” I wasn’t entirely sure. For a moment I reflected on it. They were the same age as Cedric. I had just left school. I didn’t think that we would have much in common and I guess a part of me understood how people perceived my relationship with Cedric in regards to our age gap. I didn’t want to tell him this though.

“I don’t know,” I mumbled and he brought a hand under my chin so I would look up at him.

“Hey,” his voice was just above a whisper, “there’s a reason I’m bringing you tonight, don’t doubt yourself, okay?” He brought his head closer to mine and placed a kiss on my forehead and I felt my heart flutter. Obviously he liked me enough if there was a reason he was bringing me tonight.

My fears were unfortunately confirmed at the party. Cedric had kindly introduced me to all of his friends and I was holding on, probably a little too tightly, to his arm. We were at someone's house and it was loud and dark and I could smell the alcohol and some other foul odour that I had a suspicion was drugs.

“She just finished Hogwarts, but she’s already a junior healer.” He sounded so proud that I didn’t have the heart to tell him that technically I wasn’t a junior healer yet. And all of his friends sounded impressed and I liked that.

However, once he had introduced me to everyone, he got called over by one of his teammates and turning to me he quickly mumbled a, “I’ll be right back,” and left me by myself.

I went to go over to his friends from Hogwarts, surely we would have some common ground because we went to the same school. We did. Kind of. Most of the teachers they had had either retired or left by the time I had started and I was getting lost in their stories. Not that it was their fault. They welcomed me in and they included me in conversation, but there was so much history between them and I didn’t have enough time to catch up.

I excused myself and went to the bathroom, hoping that along the way I would find Cedric and he would rescue me.

I found him on my way to the bathroom and changed trajectory so I was walking over to him. He was sitting in a lounge and there was a small space next to him.

“Hey.” He sat up as I made my way over and I squished myself onto the empty space next to him. I brought my hands around his arm once more and he smiled down at me before going back to the conversation with his teammates. They didn’t include me as much as his friends from Hogwarts did and when he was talking he was using so many hand actions that my hands got shaken away from his and they were now resting awkwardly in my lap.

He was facing away from me and I was glad because I didn’t want him to see me overreacting about this.

“I need to go to the bathroom,” I mumbled and it made me even sadder when Cedric didn’t even acknowledge me leaving.

I was slightly panicked when I realised I didn’t even know where the bathroom was, but I was even more terrified when I found it and realised that I could potentially walk in on anything. I locked the door behind me and I looked at myself in the mirror and frowned. I didn’t even know why I was so upset.

I put it down to just being overwhelmed. I was in a new environment with new people who I wanted to impress so I could impress my boyfriend, who wasn’t actually welcoming me into his friend group, who also isn’t actually my boyfriend, and who probably wants to have sex with me even though I’m not ready yet.

So maybe I did know why I was so upset.

I focused on my breathing and splashed some cold water on my face before opening the door and going out to face round two.

I didn’t get very far because as I left I bumped into Ginny Weasley. She apologised and I apologised and when we both regained our composure she smiled brightly at me.

“Hey, your Cedric’s girlfriend, yeah?” I was so shocked about running into someone and being known as Cedric’s girlfriend that I immediately replied with a, ‘yes.’

“You went to Hogwarts, right? I think you were a few years below me?” I was shocked that she remembered and had to swallow before I answered.

“Yeah I did, we were a couple years apart.” She was so famous in the Quidditch world that even I knew who she was. “Congratulations on your team getting through.” She didn’t play on the same team as Cedric but Cedric had told me that her team had gone through as well. I guess they were here also celebrating.

“Thank you,” she beamed, “so excited to be able to play in the finals.” After that I excused myself and told her that I had to find Cedric, but really all I wanted was to go home.

I kept replaying the conversation with Ginny as I made my way back to Cedric. I wasn’t entirely sure where he was because I wasn’t even sure how I found the bathroom.

People were shouting and bumping into me but all I could do was dig my nails into my hand as I recalled how I had foolishly said I was Cedric’s girlfriend.

But then I heard Cedric’s laugh and when I saw him his head had fallen back and he had a hand on his abdomen and I smiled.

I was definitely overreacting.

I went back to the seat beside Cedric, but he barely acknowledged my return. I decided that if I wasn’t going to be explicitly included in the conversation then I was still going to support Cedric. So I sat there and looked pretty and laughed at the right times and listened to every single word that they said so next time I would be able to join in.

Halfway through a conversation Cedric excused himself to go to the bathroom and I felt my breath get caught in my throat when I realised I would be left alone with his friends.

“So, has Cedric gone soft?” One of them asked me as soon as Cedric was out of ear shot. I was so shocked at being addressed that I stared at them with my mouth open for a second before I let out a laugh.

“I don’t want to embarrass him.” They all laughed at that.

“You don’t have to,” one of them said.

“We can do that.” I found myself laughing as well. Maybe this wasn’t too bad.

They kept telling me embarrassing stories about Cedric and when he came back he had a look of confusion seeing us all laughing together.

“What are you guys talking about?” he asked, laughing awkwardly, obviously feeling left out of our laughter.

“We were just reliving that time you fell of your broom when that reporter came and-”

“Don’t remind me,” he winced and for the first time that night I felt relaxed.

With Cedric back the conversation returned to one which I was no longer a part of and part of me was sad that we were no longer bonding. But before I knew it the party was over and Cedric was apparating us back to his place.

I hadn’t stayed the night at his place, yet, but I was feeling giddy after the party and was hoping that he would offer tonight.

“Did you talk to Ginny Weasley tonight?” he queried. His back was towards me but I could tell that the bubbly persona he had had with his friends was suddenly gone.

“What?” I was so shocked about the sudden change in his demeanour that that was all I could get out. “Yeah I did,” I corrected myself, my eyebrows furrowing in confusion and my arms instinctively wrapping across my chest. “Why?” We were in the kitchen, he was facing the bench and I was facing his back.

“Did you tell her we were boyfriend and girlfriend?” He finally turned around to raise an eyebrow at me accusingly and I was left standing at him dumbfounded.

“What?” This time my voice was shrill and I almost let out a chuckle at the ridiculous question.

“She came up to me and said something about how cute my girlfriend was and I was just wondering if you were telling people that we were dating?” I was so dumbstruck that all I could do was blink at him.

“So we aren’t dating?” I squinted my eyes at him, my mouth still hanging open in shock.

“Well, no,” he mumbled and I finally let out a laugh. I felt so foolish. I wanted to cry.

“So why’d you bring me out tonight then?” I gave him an incredulous look and he rolled his eyes which only made me even angrier.

“Don’t do that,” he grunted, turning away from me again.

“Do what?” I took a step closer to him.

“Get all upset and emotional about it,” he winced as if me showing any emotion disgusted him.

“About the fact that we act like a couple but you won’t make it official?”

“Look,” he paused, bringing his hands out in front of him, his palms facing me, “I don’t want to fight with you about this.”

“Well what are we, Cedric?” I was practically shouting now but I didn’t care. “You can’t expect me to go on like this if you won’t put a label on us.”

“We were doing fine before all of this, why do we need to complicate things?” I just stared at him. My mouth slightly agape, wondering if maybe I really was complicating things. I hadn’t really had a boyfriend before, is this what it was like?

“Cedric,” I begged, “we go out all the time, we make out on your couch almost every night, you invite me to your parties but then ignore me the whole night, and then when I-”

“Hang on,” he interrupted, “ignore you?” He finally turned to me and I shrunk under his intense gaze. I had seen Cedric angry before. When paparazzi followed us out of a restaurant, when he didn’t catch the snitch or lost a game. But that was an angry quiet. His jaw would visibly tense and his fingers would turn white as he dug his nails into his palm and he wouldn’t say anything to me until he had calmed down, which sometimes took days. No matter how much I tried to speak to him, he remained quiet. I was used to it. But this? I was not.

“Well, yeah,” I mumbled, suddenly not as confident as I was only seconds ago.

“Explain,” he challenged.

“You introduced me to your friends but then you left me by myself and I have nothing in common with them and then when I do go find you you ignored me the whole time and-”

“I was just talking to my friends!” he exclaimed, “is that such a fucking crime?” I think it was the first time I had heard him swear and I wished that I had never brought this up.

“It’s not, but I just, I wasn’t included in the conversation and I just felt-”

“You were in the conversation, you were laughing and they were telling you stories about me, I don’t know what the fuck you’re going on about.” I felt my bottom lip tremble, not used to being on the receiving end of such harsh words. But I took a deep breath and swallowed before continuing.

“Okay, fine, whatever,” I didn’t want to fight, I had a feeling he’d win, “but I need to know where I stand with you.” My voice was weak and he brought his hands up to run a hand through his hair before he continued.

“I don’t know,” he sounded frustrated, “I guess all my previous relationships have been physical and-”

He continued but I didn’t process a single word he said after that. Of course he wanted to be physical. Intimacy was such an important part of a relationship and I had been depriving him of that.

“I haven’t done anything before,” I spoke slowly, playing with my hands in front of my abdomen. He let out a sigh and came closer to me, grabbing my fidgeting hands in his own.

“Well don’t feel pressured to do anything, but I just think it would maybe help us become more real, you know?” I didn’t know because I had never done it. When I didn’t respond he just continued. “Look, let’s just call it a night, you can think about it and you can stay over here.” He leaned over to press a kiss to the top of my head. “I’m sorry for yelling.”

I just let him hold me close to him, my body limp as he put a hand on the curve of my spin and led me to his bedroom where he let me borrow some of his clothes.

I didn’t really want to spend the night with him anymore but it was what I wanted mere minutes ago and I couldn’t be bothered to fight it.

I thought the first time I would sleep in the same bed with him I would have the best sleep of my life. I would feel comfortable and safe. He’d have an arm around my waist and we’d either be facing each other and watching the other until the first person fell asleep, or my back would be towards him and I’d feel him breath in and out. It was neither of those things.

I was on my back, staring at the ceiling unable to fall asleep. It was a big thing to be willing to give up a part of myself for Cedric. I kept tossing and turning, hoping that sleep would find me, but it never did.

All I wanted was to get some peace and so I decided that I was willing to give that part of myself up and suddenly I was able to fall asleep.

~~~

“I’m ready,” I had told him as I sat across from him at breakfast.

“You’re ready?” He raised an eyebrow at me and I nodded.

“To you know,” I paused, “have sex.” I hated how weak my voice got as I said those last two words.

“Excellent,” he beamed, sitting up a bit straighter.

“But, do you think maybe we could take it slow?” I asked, “I kinda want my first time to be special.” It sounded silly, I knew that. But it was a lot of him to ask that I give this up for him and I was hoping that he would be able to do this one thing for me.

He let out a laugh and I wasn’t sure if I should have been offended or not.

“It’s not a big deal,” he said with his breakfast in his mouth, “your first time,” he added, “don’t put too much pressure on it.”

I wanted to tell him that to me, my first time was important, but I was scared it would turn into a fight like last night so I let it go.

I was a nervous wreck ever since that conversation. I wasn’t sure how to dress, I didn’t know what underwear and bra to wear. Did I eat beforehand? Surely I wasn’t meant to have a full bladder. I had all of these questions and really no one to ask. I wanted to ask my friends but they were still unsure about my relationship with Cedric and I wanted to ask Cedric but I feared he would think I was stupid and I wanted to prove to him that I was ready and mature enough to do this, so I figured it out myself.

It didn’t really matter what I wore because it was off me within seconds. Cedric made a comment that my lingerie was cute, but then he took it off so that didn’t really matter either. It didn’t matter that I went in with an empty stomach either because by the end of it I had lost my appetite. But my mouth was dry and I desperately needed a drink of water. Cedric offered to get me one when I was lying naked on top of his bed sheets.

My bottom lip was trembling and my chest was heaving but I knew I couldn’t cry. Cedric took it slow but it was all so quick it felt like it was over within minutes.

I was on my back the whole time, my hands briefly going out to touch Cedric’s shoulders as he leaned over me to grunt in my ear.

Maybe I was naive to think that my first time would be romantic and special and about my pleasure, maybe that just wasn’t how sex worked. Cedric obviously had a lot more experience than me and so he would know better.

But still, I just felt like there was a piece of me missing. And I knew it was stupid because I knew that virginity was just a social construct, but I had a feeling I was no longer the same person I was this morning when I woke up.

“Here you go, baby,” Cedric hummed, passing me my glass of water as I sat up and started sipping it. He got back on the bed and I placed my glass on a tissue on his bedside table.

“Thanks,” I mumbled, copying his actions and lying back down. I brought the bed sheet up to my neck.

“That was amazing,” he seemed dazed and I noticed it was the first time I had seen his hair in a mess. I figured that if he looked like he had reached euphoria then I should as well and so I agreed with him. “Was it good enough for your first time?” He gave me a lazy smirk as he came closer to me and held my body close to his.

“Yeah,” my voice came out shaky and he only chuckled in response.

“Good,” he hummed, “only the best for my girlfriend.” His arms snaked around my waist as he brought me closer to him. I laid there, still. I couldn’t move. There were too many emotions that I had never felt before and all I wanted was to have a shower, get dressed and go home. But I let him hold me close to him because at least now we were officially boyfriend and girlfriend.

Are You Real?

We had been seeing each other for just over two months and we were officially a couple now. After that night things did get better. Cedric was inviting me to stay overnight at his house often and he was starting to introduce me to his friends as his girlfriend.

The biggest shock for me was when he asked me to meet his family. I thought that was pretty serious and so I happily said yes.

I was nervous again, about meeting new people, but I didn’t want to accidentally make him angry by reminding him of the last time I was nervous about meeting people close to him.

“Don’t be so nervous,” he had chastised anyway. We were standing in front of his parents' door and I wasn’t sure if I was shivering from the nerves or the cold.

“I’m not,” I had whined, my eyebrows furrowing together as I defended myself.

“You are,” he chuckled, pulling me closer to him and wrapping my coat tighter around my body, “don’t be.” He pressed a kiss to the top of my head and we were walking into his childhood house.

“Cedric!” His father had cried out, hurrying over to give him a hug. I stood a little awkwardly behind him until his mother came up.

“And you must be his new girlfriend,” I introduced myself and she brought me in for a hug.

They were leading us into the living room and I couldn’t help but look at everything we passed as I took in his house. It was big. Bigger than any house I had ever lived in and probably even bigger than the house Cedric currently lived in.

I followed Cedric in and sat down next to him in the lounge in the living room and his dad sat in front of us. His mother went to go get us drinks while Cedric and his father caught up.

I held onto his arm, smiling the whole time and laughing at the appropriate times, fearing the moment the attention would be brought upon myself.

“So, tell me, how did you two meet?” His mother sat next to her husband and I opened my mouth to talk.

“We met in Diagon Alley,” Cedric beat me to it and I went back to smiling at them.

“Oh, that’s so sweet,” she replied, “and what do you do?” She turned to address me and I went to tell her about how excited I was to start as a junior healer.

“She’s starting as a junior healer soon,” Cedric had answered for me.

“Wow,” they both exclaimed, “that’s impressive.”

“It is,” Cedric replied, placing a hand on my knee, “it’s no surprise though, she was top of her class and head girl,” he paused, “my perfect girl.” I stared at him a bit dumbfounded, blinking rapidly, trying to figure out what to say next. We had expressed ways we admired the other, but these were some of the most heartfelt words I had ever heard Cedric say about me.

“You’re too kind,” I mumbled as his parents watched our interaction. He beamed down at me and I gave him a nervous smile.

“We’ve never seen Cedric so infatuated with someone before,” his dad teased and I could hear his mum coo. Cedric chuckled.

“Please, I don’t need you guys embarrassing me.” He let his head fall for a moment and I laughed.

“He does that enough himself.” I looked over at him and we shared another smile.

When we eventually made our way over to the dinner table I passed a photo frame of a young Cedric, he would have only been around five or six, with a broom in his hand. It was much bigger than him and in the other he had a fake golden snitch in his hand. His teeth were crooked and his eyes were crinkled from his beaming smile. I couldn’t help but stop and smile as I looked up at it.

“We always knew he would be a Quidditch star,” his mum said. I turned around and smiled at her and continued walking to the dining room.

“Mum,” Cedric complained.

“Well we did, I’m sure you were riding a broom before you could walk properly.” I laughed as I sat down at the table.

“Well, he wasn’t always good,” his dad chimed in and Cedric groaned. “There was the time you flew into our fence.”

“Oh,” his mum laughed, “and the time you lost control and broke the door.”

“I was a child.” Cedric tried to defend himself but he could barely be heard over the laughter.

He was smiling, nonetheless and as I turned over to look at him I was sure that I could see the same smile as the little boy in the photo frame. Still bright, eyes still wrinkled, but maybe straighter teeth.

And he was mine.

I wasn't sure what it was, but I suddenly felt silly about how infatuated I was with him before all of this. Maybe he was just as golden as I had always pictured him to be, but he was still human and somehow, that made me love him even more.

I had already planned that Cedric would have to meet my parents after he so graciously let me meet his and I hoped that it would go just as smoothly as it had with Cedric’s. His parents were so kind and welcoming and there was never an awkward silence which I really appreciated.

He didn’t appear nervous at all and I feared I was carrying it for both of us, but his calm disposition made me feel better.

I had a feeling it could be a little more rocky compared to meeting his because of the letter my parents had sent me when I asked them if I could bring him over. Even though I hadn’t really considered it, apparently our age gap was a bit of an issue for them and they had outlined how concerned they were for me in this relationship. I assured them that Cedric was nothing short of a gentleman and promised them that when they met him they would change their mind immediately.

I didn’t want to tell Cedric this because, really, we hadn’t had the age gap conversation and part of me was scared that if we had it he would doubt himself and call this whole thing off.

They gave me a hug when I entered and Cedric walked in and gave my dad a handshake and my mum a hug and I watched anxiously.

“And you must be Cedric,” my mum said, looking him up and down. They were both smiling but there was an awkward tension in the air which didn’t seem to bother Cedric.

“The one and only,” he joked and I eased up when I remembered how comfortable Cedric was in front of new people.

We were ushered in and found ourselves in a similar position to the one at Cedric’s house except this time, the heat - thankfully - wasn’t on myself.

“You have a lovely house,” he had commented as we walked through and I gave his hand a squeeze.

“Oh,” my parents seemed surprised, “thank you.”

“So, you’re a Quidditch star?” My dad asked when we were finally sitting down.

“Not a star,” he looked bashful and I thought it was cute, “just someone who plays sport.”

“Well you’re very good at it.” It looked like it pained my father to admit it, but Cedric kept his confident demeanour.

“Thank you,” he smiled sheepishly, “I’ve been playing ever since I can remember. Are you a big fan of Quidditch?” I was holding onto Cedric’s arm, looking between him and my dad as they conversed.

“Yeah,” my dad nodded, “but not of your team.”

“Dad.” I gave him a warning look, but he shrugged. Cedric just laughed.

“Hey,” Cedric turned to me, “a man's team is important.” I shook my head but when my father told him his team he continued. “I could get you tickets to their next game if you want?” He perked up at that and soon they were planning to go to a game together.

It seemed my dad had warmed up to Cedric and even though I was a bit weary he would give him a hard time, I was glad they had found common ground. My mum, on the other hand, still had a tight lipped smile as she studied Cedric.

“Well I better start dinner.” She stood up but before she could leave Cedric chimed in.

“Can I help you at all?” She paused and slowly turned around, her head slightly turned to the side.

“No thank you, Cedric,” she paused, “you’re our guest. She gave him a genuine smile and I let out a sigh of relief. They were both warming up to him and that was all I ever wanted.

When we finally made our way over to the dining room, Cedric pulled my chair out for me and I saw my parents share a look as my whole body suddenly turned warm.

Cedric kept the conversation going all night, telling stories about his games and asking my parents questions about themselves and about me, which I was very embarrassed about, but was glad they were getting along.

I was completely enamoured by how confident he was. If I didn’t know any better, you could tell me that he had known my parents his whole life and I would have believed you. He knew just how to charm them and somehow, I was falling even more in love with him.

I stayed back when Cedric left to spend some time with my family and once he did so my parents let out a sigh.

“He seems nice,” my mum commented.

“He’s a nice guy,” my dad said at the same time. I hummed in content. He definitely was.

I never really understood what people meant when they said their relationship was in the ‘honeymoon phase’. Wasn’t your whole relationship meant to feel like a honeymoon? I thought Cedric’s and I would. We had met the other’s family, and both times were successful. We had finally been intimate together, and I was starting to get used to it. He introduced me as his girlfriend all the time and when he wasn't busy training for the finals, we were spending every second we could together.

He had confided in me about his past relationships as well. Girls who were just in it for the fame and the money and I was glad I never brought up how stressed I was about our secretive relationship when we first started dating.

“But you’re different,” he said, “I can picture a future with you.”

I think I finally understood what the phrase picture perfect meant. Everything between Cedric and I was going so well, we just fit together so well. Everything was falling into place and I was convinced we were matching puzzle pieces.

We still hadn’t said ‘I love you’ to the other, but I knew the feelings were there for me and I was sure the feelings were there for him.

But it all started to go downhill on a random Tuesday night.

When I went over Cedric was in a bit of a mood. It was one of his quiet angry moods. I didn’t like when he was in them, but it wasn’t something new to me. I tried to be as pleasing as I could so as not to disturb him anymore.

“How was your day?” He only grunted in response, sitting at the coffee table with a hot mug of tea in his hand. I went over to the kitchen to make myself one.

“What’s wrong?” I tried to keep my voice light but I mustn’t have done a good job at it.

“Nothing,” he grumbled and I held back a sigh.

“You just seem a bit upset s’all,” I mumbled, pouring the water from the kettle into the mug that I always used at his house, “just want to help.”

“Well it is your fault,” he mumbled it so low under his breath I wasn’t even sure I heard him correctly.

“What?” I went to sit next to him and he ran a hand through his hair before passing the newspaper over at me.

There was a picture of me clinging to his arm from a night out with his friends only last week on the front page and a headline making a dig of our age gap in black, bold letters.

“Oh,” I mumbled, my eyes scanning the article to find some not nice comments about myself.

“Yeah, oh,” he scoffed and I turned to him with my eyebrows furrowed.

“You’re making this sound like it’s my fault.”

“Well if you weren’t being so clingy that night,” he mumbled. I wanted to tell him that me being ‘clingy’ probably had nothing to do with the article. If I wasn’t so ‘clingy’ they still would have said horrible things. And most of the horrible things were about me, so really, why was he so upset?

“What’s that meant to mean?” He rolled his eyes and let out a frustrated groan.

“Look, I know you’re not used to being in the spotlight but now you are and every single move you make is important, it reflects on me and it reflects on my career.”

“All I did was hold onto your arm.” It came out more like a question as I tried to wrap my head around what we were actually fighting about.

“Which makes you seem childish,” he explained as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He pointed to the comment about our age gap to prove his point and I sat back in the chair next to him.

My instinct was to reply, ‘well I am a child.’ But I wasn’t. I was seventeen now. I was an adult.

“Sorry,” I said sarcastically, “next time I’ll let them take a picture of me when I’m working.” He made an odd noise between a groan and a grunt and ran a hand through his hair so it was sticking up in odd places.

“You’re always like this,” he groaned.

“Excuse me?”

“You’re always so clingy and when I bring it up you get all defensive. You did that night of the party as well.” My whole body got hot. Was I really that clingy? I didn’t think I was.

I was speechless.

“Look, I’m sorry,” he sighed, “I’ve got my game coming up this weekend and I’m stressed and you’re not used to this.” Cedric had his semifinal match this weekend to determine whether his team made it into the final so I understood that times were tough.

I didn’t say anything back and when Cedric finally looked over at me he scooted his chair closer to me and wrapped an arm around me.

I wanted to shove it off but I didn’t know how he would react. He was red and angry only a second ago. I couldn’t believe it only took him seconds to calm down.

He was humming as he started tracing patterns on my arm with his thumb but I was too lost in my own thoughts to notice what he was humming or drawing.

I was too focused on the article in front of me. I was smiling up at him in the picture. He was looking over my head. I looked bright and radiant. That was the night he had introduced me to everyone as his girlfriend. He had practically shown me off as if he was proud of the person I was and I wished that I could go back to that person because all I wanted to do now was hide.

~~~

Cedric said he didn’t want me to come to his semi finals match.

“What?” We were at his house again. His game was the next day and this afternoon when I apparated over to his house I thought that I would have to find that scarf I left over so I could wear it to his game.

“I’ll be too nervous if you’re there watching me.” I thought he was making no sense, but I didn’t really want to fight with him before such a big game.

“But I want to cheer you on.”

“You can,” he paused, “from home.” I sighed. It seemed ever since that article Cedric and I hadn’t stopped fighting. We fought when the restaurant got our take out order wrong (because I should’ve checked it before leaving with it), we fought when I told him I wasn’t in the mood for sex (because I had been acting distant lately) and we fought whenever we went out of the house (because there was always something I did wrong).

And I was getting sick of it so I got my bag and shrugged my shoulders.

“Fine, if that’s what you really want.” He opened his mouth to say something but I apparated away before he could get a word in. “Good luck, Cedric.”

I wanted to cry as soon as I got home, but I wouldn’t allow myself to. Allowing myself to cry was almost like admitting that there was something wrong in our relationship. Which there wasn’t. We were having sex now. Things were different.

~~~

I watched him play his stupid game on the lounge in my pyjamas. I didn’t even have my stupid scarf. I still cheered for him, even though it wasn't doing them any good because they were losing. Badly.

I was tense the whole time. I didn’t think Cedric would react very well to losing the semi-finals. Especially when they got thrashed.

I debated going over to see him, but I decided I didn’t want to deal with him in a shitty mood so I apparated to his house bright and early the next day.

“He’s the reason we fucking lost.” I was standing outside his front door, but I could hear him yell.

“Mate, I know,” I heard a second voice, “but you have to calm down.” I stupidly let myself in.

“No, I’ve been training my ass off this whole season, how is it fair that we all suffer because of his stupidity?”

“It’s not, but-”

“No, I don’t care.” I had never heard his voice so loud. I was frozen standing on the other side of his door. They were in the kitchen, but I wasn’t brave enough to make myself known. “I want him off the team.”

“Mate, you can’t-”

“He can’t even play.” I heard him hit something and I involuntarily jumped. I didn’t think I made much noise, but maybe I did because they stopped talking and walked out of the kitchen to find me standing foolishly in front of his door.

I made eye contact with Cedric. My whole body was tense and hot in the worst ways possible and I wanted to walk straight back outside his door and forget this ever happened.

“You need to calm down mate.” His teammate nodded at me in acknowledgement, before patting a hand on Cedric’s back. “I’ll talk to you later.” He said goodbye to me and walked outside, before apparating away.

I didn’t know what to say. I stood there in silence before Cedric sighed.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he said. I didn’t either. He walked back into the kitchen, hitting the table and making me flinch again.

Part of me wanted him to come over and kiss the top of my head and apologise to me just like he did whenever we fought. Part of me didn’t want him to come near me ever again.

My heart was racing. I was frozen on the spot. I hoped once Cedric and I were intimate things would change and I guess in some strange way I had gotten my wish. I guess I should’ve been more specific.

The Breaking Point

Almost at the end of three months since I had first met Cedric Diggory it was my birthday. I was very excited and I had told Cedric numerous times.

“I’ve always loved my birthday.” I had mentioned to him when we were in bed one night. He hummed in response and I turned to face him. I was lying on my side and staring up at him while he had his back resting against the headboard.

“Hello,” I chuckled, noticing that he wasn’t present. His eyes briefly turned to me before going back to staring straight ahead.

“Sorry love, what were you saying?” He had been like this since his team lost the semifinals and I was trying not to get frustrated. He hadn’t had an outburst of anger since that day I walked in on him yelling at his teammate, but for some reason I felt like I had a false sense of security.

“Just that I was excited for my birthday,” I shrugged, turning onto my back. I suddenly didn’t want to have this conversation.

“And I’m excited that you’re excited,” he smirked down at me before moving his body so he was lying on his side and looking at me. I giggled and playfully rolled my eyes.

“I’m excited to introduce you as my boyfriend to all my friends,” I mumbled, giving him a cheesy grin. He beamed at me and moved his head to press a kiss to my cheek. Most of my friends hadn’t really shown any desire to meet Cedric, they still had their concerns but I was certain as soon as they met him they would change their mind.

“Wouldn’t want it any other way.”

But apparently there was another way. I didn’t have a massive party in his defence. It was just my family and my friends and him. If he was here. But we were only an hour into the party and he still had plenty of time to show up.

We were out in a pub in Diagon Alley, the same one where I had met Cedric. I had had a few drinks but I didn’t want to forget my birthday so I was waiting a while before I had my next.

My friends were around me, dancing and laughing and I tried not to think about how excited I was to introduce them to Cedric.

“Where’s your boy toy?” One of them had laughed when they arrived. I chuckled, trying not to let anything have an effect on me.

“He’s just running a bit late, he will be here soon.” I didn’t know if he would actually be here soon, but it was what I kept telling myself.

Surely he hadn’t forgotten, I had been speaking about it for the past two weeks. I’m sure that something had come up, he wouldn’t just not show up.

Two hours into the party the fear crept in that he wouldn’t show up.

“Where’s Cedric?” My dad had asked and I thought it was funny how even though it was my birthday everyone was concerned with Cedric Diggory. So maybe my thoughts were turning a bit sour. I guess that happens when your boyfriend is late to your birthday party with no explanation.

“Just running a bit late.” I couldn’t count on both hands how many times I had said that in the past hour. He gave me a sympathetic look and I smiled back at him in response, trying to convince him everything was fine. I was feeling bad enough for myself, I didn’t need anyone else to do so as well.

I was a little embarrassed. I knew my dad was warming up to Cedric, they got along quite well. Part of me worried about how distraught my dad would be if Cedric didn’t show up (because he was going to show up). But the other part of me was too focused on how distraught I was that he wasn’t here yet.

My eye was kept on the door for the whole night. I thought that maybe if I imagined him walking in with that charming smile and his golden hair styled to perfection that it might actually happen.

It didn’t. We were now three hours into my party and I wasn’t sure that Cedric was going to show. The only word that kept replaying through my mind was why? A few times I caught someone’s eye when I finally stopped staring at the door and they gave me a sympathetic smile. I was sad that Cedric didn’t show and everyone knowing that he didn’t show felt even worse. I excused myself to go to the bathroom but it seemed everyone was trying to have fun for me and I wasn’t sure if anyone heard.

The bathroom was empty and I walked over to the sink. My hands were shaking as I turned on the tap and I thought that I was being stupid. It was my birthday. I had had plenty of birthdays without a boyfriend and while this time I actually did have one - he just didn’t show up - I told myself that this wasn’t any different.

But it was. He didn’t show up. I tried to tell myself that something had happened. He wasn’t the type of person to do this. But surely he would have sent an owl or a patronus or something. I let the cool water fall into my hands and I flicked them up so some of it would cool my face down.

I took a look at myself in the mirror and frowned. The last time I looked at myself in this mirror I was a completely different person. I hadn’t even met Cedric Diggory. I was still a virgin. Suddenly I felt like I was going to throw up and not wanting to be even more embarrassed on my birthday, my body settled for a few tears streaming down my face.

I let out a harsh sob and brought my hands up to my face. My palms were cool on my cheeks but the warm flow of tears prevented me from embracing it.

I stood there, crying for a minute until I heard the door open and I quickly pulled my hands away from my face and brought them back under the sink hoping that whoever walked in would think I was just washing my hands.

“Hey,” I heard a familiar voice and then I heard them say my name. I turned around to see Ginny Weasley, looking as stunning as ever. “What’s wrong?” The smile on her face disappeared as she saw my swollen cheeks and she started walking closer to me.

“Nothing,” I smiled. I wanted to say more. I wanted to tell her that Cedric was what was wrong. I wanted to tell her that I was stupid for ever thinking that I had a chance with the golden boy because I was starting to realise the golden boy doesn’t exist. But I had only spoken to her, like, once before so I didn’t think it was appropriate.

She stared at me for a moment, seemingly unsure what to do. I gave her a small smile but she only frowned.

“You were crying.” It sounded more like a question and when she raised an eyebrow at me I almost told her everything.

“You know what’s even worse?” I didn’t deny it. “It’s my birthday.” I let out a laugh trying to make an awkward situation better but I don’t think it had the effect I wanted it to. Her eyes widened and she took a step over to me. She put a hand out as if she was going to reach for my shoulder and I gave her a tiny nod before she placed an arm around me.

“Where’s Cedric? I’ll go get him, yeah?” I knew she meant well but that only made me start crying again and I think she realised that he was the reason I was crying and so she pulled me closer towards her. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled and the conversation ended. She started stroking my back and when I calmed down she let out a deep breath before continuing.

“You’re so young,” she mumbled, “this is only going to be a small part of your life, yeah? Enjoy your birthday.” I gave her a tight lipped smile and pulled away from her.

“Thank you,” I looked at her, “I really appreciate it.” She smiled at me and I wiped my eyes before I walked out of the bathroom.

I was going to enjoy my birthday whether a certain someone was here or not.

I had a few more drinks, suddenly not caring anymore whether or not I remembered this night.

I was near tears when everyone sang happy birthday. My eyes were glued to the door no matter how badly I wanted to look away.

I was surrounded by the people I loved yet I felt so alone and upset. I sighed when I blew out the candles. There was only one wish on my mind.

I was on my second slice of cake when one of my friends sat down next to me.

“It’s your birthday,” they slurred, “it’s supposed to be fun.” I mustered up my most convincing smile.

“I am having fun.” I wasn’t.

He should have been here.

I’m pretty sure everyone else was thinking the same thing but they were polite enough not to bring it up.

I’m pretty sure my friend was thinking the same thing, but they didn’t say either. They picked up a spoon and took a bite of my cake. We sat there, not talking, just enjoying the cake. It was saying a lot that this was the best part of my night.

I was sure everyone gave me an extra longer hug when they left and the pats on my back felt more sympathetic than celebratory but I tried not to linger on it.

That night I went to my bedroom and got into my comfiest pyjamas. There was an owl at my window when I hopped into bed and I already knew who it was from.

It was rolled up and for a moment I contemplated just ripping it to shreds without even reading it and when I opened it I wished I had.

I’m sorry I didn’t show,

Cedric xx

That was it?

I gave the owl a treat and ripped the note in half and in half again and in half again until I was sure that it could never be put back together. I was feeling a similar way. I started crying. I guess it’s not really a birthday if you don’t cry, right? I threw the crumpled paper in my bin and sat on my bedroom floor.

For a brief moment I wondered if it was my fault. It seemed all of the stupid fights we had been having had arose as a result of me, and maybe this one was the same. I wondered what it was. Whether it would appear too childish for Cedric to appear at a birthday party, or whether I would be too clingy throughout the night.

If it wasn’t for the amount of alcohol I had consumed I was sure I wouldn’t have gotten an ounce of sleep. But I woke up the next morning as well rested as I could have been and I got ready and apparated to Cedric’s house immediately.

I wasn’t sure what I planned on doing. I wanted to remember all of the good times Cedric and I had but they seemed so far away. Oddly enough they were before the first time we had sex which I only agreed to in hopes that things would get better.

I felt helpless. I wanted to go back to those picture perfect days, but I knew that there was nothing I could do to get back there. But I guess I hoped that we could work from where we currently were and get somewhere even better.

The Reeling

Standing in front of Cedric’s door I realised that this was a horrible idea. Surely Cedric and I could just go past this and maybe even just pretend it didn’t happen.

Part of me was scared that the reason he didn’t show up was because of something I’d done. For some reason I thought that maybe if I proved that I was willing to fight for our relationship, we’d unlock a new part of our relationship. Like when we finally had sex. Except this time it would unlock something even better.

I knocked on the door and let out a shaky breath.

He opened it almost instantly and he gave me a nervous smile. I let myself in and he shut the door behind me.

“Did you have fun last night, darling?” I turned back to face him and stared at him dumbly.

“You didn’t come.” I responded and he let out a sigh and walked over to me, grabbing my hand in his.

“I’m so sorry, darling.” He only rarely called me darling and I suddenly hated the way it sounded in his mouth. “I was just upset about not making it to finals and-” I took a step back from him.

“You should’ve been there.” He looked down and I sniffled when I felt the tears start to fall down my cheeks.

“I should have.” We stayed like that for a moment. My hands in his. Tears streaming down my face while he continued to stare at our hands. I thought I would be the one who would have trouble with this. I really wanted him to just look at me.

“Darling,” he paused, “I think we should break up.” My whole body went hot.

“No,” I mumbled, trying to pretend that I didn’t hear what I thought I did. How did we get here? I came here so we could make up, not to break up.

“Yes,” he replied, almost pleading with me.

“I can get over you not coming to my birthday.” I was begging and I hated myself for it. The tears had stopped but I would much rather them than whatever this was.

“It’s not about that.”

“Then what is it?” He took a deep breath as if it pained him to say this but I was sure that I was in much more pain. “I’ll do anything, just name it, I’ll do anything for you. We can make it work.” The worst part was that I meant it.

“Don’t say that,” he sighed.

“It’s true. I’m not angry,” I sobbed, “I can’t let you go.”

“You have to.” I wanted to scream. I wanted to throw my body on the floor or hit something. I already felt like a fool but I was ready to make myself look even worse and throw a tantrum right there and then.

“We’re just not going to work out.” He gave me an apologetic look, but it only made me mad.

“Why?” He blinked at me, his eyes saying that he hated me for making him say it.

“Look,” he went to reach out for me again but I pulled away, “maybe if we were closer in age, I just-” I let out a dry laugh cutting him off and felt the tears start up again. I was no longer sad. I was angry now. I had given so much of myself to Cedric and it was all for nothing. All for him to just throw it all back in my face.

“You said I was mature for my age.” I hated that I felt the need to defend myself. I was embarrassed. What a horrible thing to say. I wanted the world to swallow me up and forget that Cedric Diggory was ever an important person in my life.

“You were-you are,” he corrected himself, “but you’re still so young and-”

“But we had sex.” He gave me a look that said I was only proving his point and I wanted nothing more than to shrink into the ground beneath me.

“I’m sorry.”

“So you’re just going to throw away everything we worked towards?” He put a hand on my shoulder but I only stood there, frozen in place, not knowing what my life had just turned into.

I shoved it off and started walking to his door.

“Hang on,” he followed me, “wait.” But I didn’t. I walked out his door and slammed it behind me. I thought he was being selfish. That he was taking the easy route. He was being childish, real adults would have talked it out, but he just ran away from his issues.

I felt helpless. I wondered if I had done things differently if we’d still be together. Maybe if I didn’t make such a big deal about having sex he wouldn’t have thought I was childish. Maybe if I was more confident when we were out with his friends he wouldn’t have thought I was so clingy. Maybe we still would’ve been together.

The Remembering

I apparated straight home and went right into my bedroom. I shut the door behind me and contemplated falling against it dramatically, but it felt more right to go jump on my bed and so I did that. The tears didn’t stop and I didn’t leave my room until the next morning.

I felt so used. I was right when I was upset in the bathroom on my birthday. I was a different person and while I knew eventually this change would come, I felt that it had been forced to come early by my relationship with Cedric and it made me feel dirty. I wanted to shower to get rid of it but that didn’t help. I wanted to go on a walk to get my mind off of it but that didn’t work either. I tried to eat to cleanse my body from it but it seemed that I was stuck with this change. I was never going to get back the person that I was before him.

I didn’t realise how much I had been relying on him until I didn’t have him. I suddenly felt like a child again. Not knowing how to make my own decisions, forever unsure about what I was doing and feeling so lost and alone.

It seemed that everyone knew that our relationship had ended and I was happy because I didn’t have to tell them. I wasn’t happy, however, that they found out by a tabloid headline barely a week after Cedric had broken up with me. He was out with a model, only a year older than me, a hand on her lower back and her face close to his chest and I decided to rip that up into pieces as well.

It felt so surreal that at times I thought that I would see Cedric again until I remembered what had happened and I was enveloped by a sinking feeling. It was a self made hell everytime I remembered what had happened and I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to think about him again without feeling this way.

I was also stuck remembering all of the good times and conveniently forgetting the bad. I’d remember when we used to go out and he’d pay for dinner. Or when it was just the two of us at his house and he’d make me my favourite foods, dancing in his kitchen while we waited for it to cook. And when it was just us in bed and he’d trace patterns on my back and make me guess what he was drawing.

And I would sob even harder because I wanted to go back to those times.

But then I’d remember how he wouldn’t speak to me once the paparazzi found out where we were. Or when we would scream and fight in the kitchen and I’d be sick from it. And when I’d spend the night and we’d be on the edge of each side of the bed, our backs facing the other, refusing to be the first one to speak.

I self indulgently let myself cry and cry and cry some more for at least a week until my parents called my friends for support. Time went so slowly feeling sorry for yourself in your bedroom, that I was shocked to hear that it had been a week when my friends told me I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself.

A month later there was a charity Quidditch game that I was watching with my dad. He went to turn it off as soon as the familiar head of golden curls appeared on screen for an interview but I stopped him before he could.

“Is it true that you’ve broken up?” They were quick to mention my name as soon as the niceties were taken care of.

Just the sight of him made my heart ache. All of the memories came flooding back, the good and the bad and remembering them together felt like I was in a whole new hell.

Cedric stared at the reporter dumbfounded until he suddenly found his voice. “The match tonight is for a very important cause and I think we should focus on that.”

“People are saying that you took advantage of her because of her age, what do you say about that?” I snorted at the question.

“I think people should focus on the match tonight and the important cause it is for.” He let out an awkward chuckle but the reporter was relentless.

“Do you miss her?” Cedric shook his head and must have looked over to his manager before he was pulled away from the screen.

I felt happy that I was still affecting his life a month after our relationship because he was still affecting mine but I was sad that he didn’t seem phased by it. I was sure that if I was asked in an interview about Cedric I would start crying immediately. But then again, I was the one who was broken up with.

I still wondered if I had done things differently if I’d still have him in my life. It was a sour taste. I had spent so much time with those thoughts that I was starting to get sick of them, but the more time I spent on them, the more things I remembered that made me wonder if he would have stayed if I had done them differently.

During the match I realised that he still had my fucking scarf. The one that I had spent my hard earned money on only to wear one time. I wondered if he knew he had it. I was sure he did. I kinda hoped he did. I hoped he kept it as a reminder of me. I wanted so desperately to forget him, but I didn’t want him to forget me and I didn’t think that was asking too much.

Thirteen Years Gone

I continued to feel foolish. I remembered the first time we went out, the first time I came back to his house. Everything just seemed to fit into place and I had naively imagined a life of marriage and children. Probably little quidditch players who were just as bright as their father. At least I could laugh at it now. I was only just a child myself.

It took months before I could go about my day without him crossing my mind and it took years and plenty of relationships until I realised what they were truly meant to be like.

I mourned the loss of our picture perfect beginnings, the way he always made me feel safe and at home. The way he used to hold me at night after I had given myself to him over and over again.

It took months before I could even go back to Diagon Alley without thinking of him. And even now, when I walked past, it was more that I was able to push aside the thought of him rather than completely disregard him.

I thought that as time went on I would forget about it. That I would forget about him. And sure, I distracted myself and I eventually thought about him less and less, but my memories were as vivid as ever. The way he would look at me, his eyes crinkled, a piece of his hair covering his forehead, as if I was the only thing that mattered in his world. The way he would hold onto my hips when we hugged, his fingers drumming into the flesh of my side as I buried my face in his chest, thinking that I could stay there for eternity. But now they were all scars that I wore that changed the way I lived and thought, and even though it eventually got easier to forget him, I never forgot them.

#cedric diggory #cedric diggory imagine #cedric diggory blurb #cedric diggory angst #harry potter #harry potter imagine #harry potter blurb #harry potter angst #cd #cdi #cda

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