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obsessedwithceleste · 1 month

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The Stages of Grief

Lorenzo Berkshire x Reader

Prompt 5 of @thatdammchickennugget ‘s Hogmarch challenge🫶🏽

Summary: They say that when you experience grief, you go through five stages. And after being partnered with Lorenzo Berkshire for your latest potions assignment, rest be assured, you were experiencing all five.

word count: 6.2k

©️ obsessedwithceleste. all works posted here belong to me and should not be reposted or copied in any way or form.

Denial

“Oh you’re kidding,” you groan as you finally spot your name on the list of assigned pairings for your next potions assignment.

You loved potions; in fact it was one of your favorite classes at Hogwarts, despite its demanding course work. You ironically found its rigid, methodical nature to be quite relaxing as moving step by step through the different recipes seemed to practically be second nature. It was a rhythmic dance that you followed religiously, finding thrill in the ever changing contents of your cauldron.

What you did not love however, or who you did not love to be more precise, was Lorenzo Berkshire. Flirtatious, carefree, and devilishly handsome, you were fairly certain that that boy could chat up a corpse. Or he could if he or his friends ever bothered showing up to class. It’s not that you disliked the boy per se, but to allow him onto your sacred ground? Into your sanctuary? You’d rather not.

Yet, there his name was, scrawled neatly next to yours on the board. It was like the universe had it out for you. Or your professor more likely.

“Tell me I read it wrong,” you complain turning to Daphne who was sat beside you.

The two of you had made an unlikely pairing in second year herbology and been inseparable ever since.

The girl just rolls her eyes at you.

“Oh come on, he’s really not as bad as you make him out be,” she sighs, scribbling notes from the board onto her parchment.

“Maybe not to you, but you’ve known him your whole life,” you grumble.

Personally, you’d always found the boy to be a bit of a prick. He was a pretty boy and he knew it, giving him a rather inflated ego you thought.

“Yeah, so don’t you think I might know him a bit better and perhaps be a better judge of character?” She asks.

“Maybe the professor will let me work alone.”

“Oh honestly, y/n. Look, at least he’s in class today. You’ll be fine, promise. And if he annoys you, even a little, I’ll owl his mother,” Daphne replies, not even bothering to look up from her notes. She was used to your dramatics by now.

“Alright, alright, everyone settle down,” your professor calls out, moving to stand at the front of the room before you can complain any further. “This next assignment will take course over the span of the next month or so, as you will be expected to collect some of your ingredients outside of class. So. Who can tell me a little bit about what this next potion that we’re brewing is?”

Your hand shoots into the air as soon as the question leaves your professor’s lips.

“Amortentia is the most powerful love potion in existence. It doesn’t really create love though, but rather infatuation which makes it one of the most dangerous potions in the world,” you recite.

“Yes, yes! Very good, y/n! Five points!”

“Really if it’s so dangerous, I don’t see why they’re teaching a bunch of sixth years how to brew it,” Daphne mumbles to you under her breath.

You let out a snicker. She had a point.

You turn back to the front of the classroom, tuning back into the lesson as your professor begins scratching away on the chalkboard once more.

“The ingredients that you’ll need to gather are as follows. Two ashwinder eggs, rose thorns, peppermint, powdered moonstone, pearl dust, and rose petals. You’ll have the next two weeks to gather your ingredients with your partners, so I suggest you begin,” your professor announces.

You feel your shoulders wilt at the thought of purposely seeking out Lorenzo, but you can already feel his eyes on you from across the room.

“Do you think if I ignore him long enough he’ll get the idea and just go away?” You whisper to your friend.

Daphne just rolls her eyes at you once more, shaking her head.

“Go,” she sighs, giving you a light shove in his direction before moving to join Theodore Nott at a different station.

With one last sigh of despair, you make your way over to the station where Enzo sits waiting for you, silently mourning your potions grade. And your mental and emotional stability.

“Mornin’ love,” he greets giving you a bright lopsided grin as you approach.

“Hi,” you respond dryly with a tight lipped smile.

“So, what’s our game plan going to be, darlin? I reckon we’ll want to get the hardest ingredients to come by first yeah?” He pushes on, ignoring your clear disinterest.

You nod your head in response.

“The peppermint, rose petals and thorns will be easy. We can get all of those in the greenhouse. The pearl dust- I assume we’ll need fresh pearls, we can probably get from the Black Lake.”

“Great. I think I have a moonstone in my ingredient collection. We can crush it down for the powdered moonstone,” Enzo offers.

You raise your brows at this. Moonstone wasn’t necessarily rare by any means, but you weren’t really expecting Enzo to offer up ingredients from his personal collection.

“That would work. We can also find them in the dark forest,” you reply.

“Nah, save us the hassle. Pretty girl like you doesn’t have any business in that musty old forest anyway,” he responds with a charming grin.

Ignoring his comment, you continue on to the last item on the list.

“I’m really not sure where we’re going to find those eggs. I don’t think we can find ashwinders on the school grounds, and they’re quite risky to breed.”

Enzo stares at you blankly.

“Remind me what an ashwinder is again love?” He says sheepishly.

“Magic serpent. Born from the embers of magic flames that are left to burn. You’re a Slytherin, shouldn’t you know all about snakes and such?”

“Yeah, let me recite to you the alphabetical list of all known magical serpent species that us Slytherins actually use as the password to our common room.”

You purse your lips at the boy’s obvious sarcasm.

“Fair enough. Still don’t know how we’ll get the eggs though.”

“I can see if we have any in our stores at the manor. Probably our best bet if we don’t want to risk burning down the school.” Enzo replies.

“Are you sure? We’re already using your moonstone,” you say, beginning to feel a bit bad about raiding the boy for supplies.

“It’s the least I can do really. I’m useless at potions, so least I can do is provide you with the ingredients that we need,” he says honestly with a light laugh.

“Well alright. Shall we meet up on Friday then to collect the pearls?” You ask, scribbling down your plans in your notebook.

“Sounds good, six o’clock? By the dock?”

You nod in agreement.

“Well alright then. See you then, love.” And with a grin and a cheeky wink thrown your way, Enzo is off.

At least he was pulling his weight in gathering ingredients you supposed.

Anger

“Y/n! Are you headed down to the docs?” Daphne asks slightly out of breath as she runs up to you from across the court yard.

“Yeah. Enzo tell you?”

Daphne nods her head in response as you two begin to make the short trek down to the lake.

“Hope you don’t mind if Theo and I join you?”

“Course not. Probably better that I’m not alone with Enzo by the lake anyway. Wouldn’t want him to try and drown me.” You say lightly, only slightly joking.

“Oh piss off. He’s a nice bloke once you get to know him.” Daphne laughs.

As the two of you arrive at the edge of the lake, you can already see Enzo, Theodore, and Mattheo splashing about in the water. Draco and Pansy are watching disdainfully from the shore.

You hadn’t realized this was going to be a whole party.

“Daph, please get these boys under control!” Pansy shouts when she sees the two of you approaching.

“I’m not their mum, they won’t listen to me,” Daphne replies dryly.

“Sure they will. Or at least Theo will, and the other two dimwits will follow whatever he does.” Pansy replies.

“Theodore!” Daphne shouts, turning to the three boys who were waist deep in the water by this point.

“Bella?” He calls back, visibly perking up at the sight of your friend.

You watch with amusement as Daphne points a finger at the boy and then again at the ground next to her. Theo slowly sulks over to the four of you, Mattheo and Enzo following in his wake.

“Really Theodore? You’re sopping wet,” Daphne sighs, only to be met with a sheepish grin.

“Hey love,” Enzo greets, prancing over to stand beside you.

It takes everything in you to focus anywhere but Enzo’s soaking wet shirt as it clung to his chest and abdomen like a second, very see-through skin. Bloody hell.

“Hi Enzo,” you say through gritted teeth.

“Are you sure we’ll even find pearls here? I thought pearls were from the ocean, and I don’t want to risk getting wet for nothing,” Draco says, eyeing the lake warily.

“Hogwarts a History says that fresh water pearls are common in the Black Lake,” you reply.

“What’s the difference?”

“Saltwater pearls are generally rarer, more expensive.” Pansy replies easily.

“Fresh water mussels can produce multiple pearls at a time, but oysters generally only produce a single pearl in their entire lifetime,” you explain.

“So how exactly are we going to collect these mussels?” Theo asks.

“Accio.” Daphne responds, as if it should’ve been obvious. Which it was.

Your now rather large group makes it way onto the dock, squinting into the murky water for any trace of mussels in the sand below.

Daphne finds the first one, and after that, they slowly start pouring in. Eventually, there’s a sort of system in place with you, Daphne, Pansy, and Draco scanning the dark waves for the elusive mussels, while Theo, Mattheo, and Enzo crack them open to retrieve the pearls.

It’s all going swimmingly until the boys begin to get rowdy once more, with Mattheo sending a small wave of water at Enzo when his back is turned. Daphne gives the boys several warning glares as the waves gradually grow larger, only for them to start up again the moment your backs are turned.

Eventually it turns into an all out water war between the three of them once more, and you scowl as you feel a splash of water hit your leg.

Could they not cause a ruckus for one afternoon? You thought bitterly as another mussel flew into your hand. You go to place it in the pile with the others when you feel a weight hit you like a ton of bricks. Then cold. Everything is cold as you feel yourself hit the water.

“What the fuck!” You exclaim once your head breaks the surface and you frantically wipe water from your eyes.

You look over to see Lorenzo in the water near you, a grin plastered across his face. His smile quickly fades however when he sees the pure murderous intent in your eyes.

“What is wrong with you?” You shout, swimming over to him, and shoving him under the waves.

“Y/n! You can’t drown him!” Daphne yells from the dock.

“Watch me!”

“It was an accident, swear!” Enzo gasps when his head re-emerges once more.

With one last scream of rage, you make your way to land as Daphne runs to catch up with you.

“Seriously Daphne? What is wrong with him?” You rage as you storm up the hill back to the castle.

“I really don’t think he meant for you to get shoved into the lake. The boys can get pretty tunnel visioned,” Daphne offers as she follows behind.

“That’s easy for you to say, you’re not the one who went for a swim,” you mutter between chattering teeth, the cold really beginning to sink in.

“Oh I’m not defending him. Not completely I mean. He was totally acting like a right git. The other boys too. I don’t blame you for being upset, I would be too. I’m just saying, maybe don’t be too hard on him? It was an accident after all, and he really did look sorry.”

When you only shrug in response, Daphne sighs.

“Look. Give him one last chance, and if you still think he’s the worst person on earth, at least exploit the fact that he really does feel bad, and milk it for all he’s worth. Okay?”

You let out a smile at this.

“Spoken like a true Slytherin, Daph.”

Bargaining

The following Monday when you take your seat next to Lorenzo in potions, he immediately turns his head, almost like he’s surprised you hadn’t demanded to be reassigned partners.

“I’m so sorry, y/n. I really didn’t mean for you to end up in the lake, Theo just shoved me and I grabbed on the closest thing which happened to be you. I really am sorry,” he rambles, fiddling with the quill in his hand nervously.

“It’s okay. I know it was an accident, so let’s just move on, alright?” You say with a sigh.

Maybe if the both of you just moved on, this nightmare of a pairing would be over sooner.

“Really?” Lorenzo asks, his bright personality snapping back into place.

“Sure Enzo.”

“Excellent. Because I was able to get us these,” he says proudly, carefully pulling two little eggs and a medium sized moonstone out of his bag. “Oh, and the pearls.” He adds, placing the eggs, stone, and glass container filled with pearls on the table in front of you.

You eye the ingredients carefully before determining that they were in fact all up to standard.

“Perfect. I’ll begin crushing up the pearls, if you take care of the moonstone?” You say, already pouring the shiny orbs into your mortar and pestle.

The two of you work surprisingly well together for the rest of the class period, almost as if you’d been working together for years. It takes you by surprise how easy the brown haired boy is to work with. You hadn’t been expecting much, knowing that potions wasn’t Enzo’s strong suit. But he made up for it by making sure you never wanted for anything. Needed a vial for your pearl dust? It was in your hands before you even had to ask. A fire needed to be lit beneath the ashwinder eggs to keep them from spoiling? Enzo’s wand was pointed in their direction before you had the chance to open your mouth.

As class winds down and you go to make your exit, you feel a hand on your wrist.

“Y/n?” Enzo says, stopping you. You turn to look at the boy.

“Look uh, I know that you’re not my biggest fan, or at least that’s what I gathered from Daph,” he begins to ramble, scratching the back of his neck, “but, could we maybe like, just start over?”

You’re a bit skeptical at first, but seeing his nervous smile melts something in you. Being friendly couldn’t hurt, you reasoned. And it would certainly make working with the boy easier.

“Alright, Enzo, we can start over.”

“Wicked.” He says with a grin. “Don’t suppose you’d like to meet in the greenhouse later then to gather the rest of our ingredients? Promise I won’t drag Theo and Matt along this time.”

“Sounds lovely.”

The both of you agree to meet right after classes are released that day, and as you make your way down the cobblestone path to the greenhouse, you can’t seem to push the memories of wet hair and an infectious smile from your thoughts.

“Hi love!” Enzo calls out as soon as you push open the doors of the greenhouse. The boy is elbows deep in soil, pulling at the roots of a suspiciously pink colored plant.

“How’d you get here so fast?” you ask, glancing at the clock to see that classes had ended not even ten minutes ago.

“Herbology is my last class of the day,” he explains, brushing some of the dirt off his gloves.

“Ah. So you wanted to meet right after classes ended so you wouldn’t have to make the trek back out here?” You ask, fingertips brushing the soft petals of one of the many flowering plants growing within the greenhouse.

“Well, and I wanted to see you again sooner,” he replies with a shrug and a cheeky grin.

You roll you eyes as you feel your cheeks heat up, turning quickly and hoping he hadn’t seen.

“So where are the rose bushes?” You ask, looking around at the distinct lack of roses within the building.

Enzo gives a nervous chuckle. “About that. Apparently Professor Sprout didn’t think that the common rose was, ah, dangerous enough, for her plant collection,” Enzo says, gesturing towards the various plants, “so, uh, there are none. But! We can grow them pretty easily. It might take a week or two to grow a full bush to peak maturity, but it should be fine.”

You let out a sigh. Of course Hogwarts wouldn’t grow something as simple and common as a rose.

“Alright, well. Let’s begin I suppose.”

Enzo immediately perks up as he goes to fetch a large pot and a bag of soil and you begin to rifle through the cabinets to find rose seeds. After several minutes with no success, you feel a warm presence behind you as Enzo leans over your shoulder and plucks a packet off the top shelf.

“You certainly know your way around,” you murmur, looking up to find the boy’s face much closer than anticipated. You feel heat rise to your cheeks once more and you duck under is elbow, making your escape.

“Herbology is my best subject,” Enzo says, trailing behind you.

“Ah, so you’re the Slytherin version of Neville Longbottom then eh?” You say with a grin as you watch him fill the pot with soil.

Enzo grimaces, making a face.

“No, I’m much better looking,” he says with a smirk.

Bloody self-aware bastard.

It only takes a few minutes for Enzo to bury the seeds in the soil and place several incantations over the dirt before he looks up at you with a triumphant grin.

“All good to go,” he says happily. “Though we should probably check back in daily to refresh the enchantments and such.”

You nod your head at the boy.

Over the course of the next few days, Enzo uses your time spent together to pick your brain for any morsel of information he could get out of you. He really was determined to be your friend apparently.

“What’s your favorite plant?” He asks you on the third day of your little meetings.

You tilt your head a bit in consideration.

“No, no, wait, I bet I can guess. Is it peonies? Your perfume is peony scented right?” He asks.

“Yeah, it is. Peony and vanilla,” you say, eyeing the boy suspiciously.

“Knew it,” he says, looking rather self satisfied.

“And yours?” You ask, leaning against the table to look up at him.

“Hmm?”

“What’s your favorite flower? Or plant that is.”

Enzo pauses for a moment, eyes flickering around the greenhouse for a moment before landing on you.

“I like roses.”

“Really?” You say, scrunching your nose a bit.

“I’m a romantic, what can I say?”

“Gross. That’s so cliche.” You tease, a small smile gracing your face.

As the days go on, your time spent in the greenhouse becomes longer and longer as you and Lorenzo banter about the ridiculous questions he’d come up with. Did owls have knees? Which house would win in hand to hand combat? Were Theodore and Daphne secretly hooking up in the fifth floor prefect’s bathroom? (The answer was yes.)

You were shocked to find that, while still a bit of a prat, Enzo really was rather smart and witty. As the days went on, it became easier and easier to open up to the boy until the two of you were talking like old friends.

It happened slowly. You really didn’t even notice at first. But by the second week, you found yourself looking forward to your daily meetings, and found yourself thinking of the handsome brunette when he wasn’t around, and you caught yourself staring at the boy a bit too long after he’d already looked away.

Over the years of being friends with Daph, you’d often been forced into the proximity of the boy. Always noting the way he’d easily move from one witch to the next, his charm never seeming to fail him. You had been so determined to make sure that you would never be one of those witches. Just another tally on Lorenzo’s ever growing list of conquests.

But it had happened. The unimaginable. The impossible. You were falling for Lorenzo Berkshire. No, this simply wouldn’t do you thought to yourself as you made the familiar trek to the greenhouse.

Your mind raced as you thought of ways to stop this madness. Maybe if you went back to pushing the boy away. Or if you just ignored him. Yes. If you just shut him out, these feelings would go away.

Sarcasm

The next several days for Lorenzo were miserable. And that was putting it nicely.

“She hates me!” Enzo wailed dramatically, hanging upside down off the edge of his bed.

It had been three days since your terrifying revelation in the green house, and Enzo was very convinced that he was going insane.

He could still remember clearly the day that Daphne had introduced him to her new friend after one fateful day in herbology. You had been so wicked smart, and kind, and funny, and your smile had melted his heart. He was pretty sure he’d been in love with you ever since. But he was lucky if you even acknowledged his presence most days.

“Can you blame her? Didn’t you send a flock of peacocks after her when we were all visiting Draco’s last year?” Mattheo asks, squinting at his friend.

“I thought it’d be romantic! How was I supposed to know they weren’t friendly?”

“There’s also that time in third year, you knocked her off her broom playing quidditch.” Draco adds, scowling at the memory of Enzo harassing the birds on his family’s property.

“I caught her after!” Enzo protests.

“She still sprained her wrist.”

“Oh yea. And then you tried to give her a kiss as an apology, but ended up with a nice bruise on your jaw instead,” Mattheo laughs.

Lorenzo wasn't going to lie, that was a particular sore spot for him.

“And let’s of course not forget the most recent offense. Trying to drown her in the lake. Thank Salazar I wasn’t there for that scene.” Blaise mutters.

Enzo winces.

After the incident at the lake, Enzo was sure he was done for. The look of pure rage in your eyes had felt as though you had stomped on his heart, and then cruciod it for good measure. But then you had accepted his apology and even agreed to start things over. Enzo had felt the first real burst of hope after four pitiful years of pining.

Sure he’d made some missteps over the years. As his friends so graciously enjoyed reminding him, but he meant well!

The two of you had talked. Laughed. He’d even allowed his hand to brush up against yours a time or two, delighted when you didn’t flinch away.

And then, as if the switch had flipped, it was back how it had been before. Enzo felt like he had whiplash with the way you had turned right back around to treating him like a total stranger.

Theo eyed his roommate with concern.

“Bloody hell, he’s worse than you pining over Daphne,” Mattheo mutters, jabbing an elbow into Theo’s rib cage, earning him a sharp glare.

“I don’t understand! Things were going so well! She was actually talking to me and everything, and now it’s like I’m right back at square one,” Enzo sighs, ignoring his bickering roommates.

“I don’t know what you’re expecting from us mate. You’re supposed to be the romantic one of the group. Though with your track record, I’m not sure why we’ve been taking your advice all these years. You’re a wreck.” Blaise says, matter of factly.

“You tried talking to Daph bout it?” Theo asks, not quite sure how to help his slightly delirious friend.

“Ask me about what?” Daphne asks, seemingly materializing in the doorway of the boys’ shared dormitory.

She makes her way into the room, face morphing into one of both concern and disgust as she takes in Enzo's distraught state.

Theo eyes his friend, as if to say “good luck mate.”

Dragging himself into an upright position, Enzo considers the girl in front of him. How had he not thought of it before? Y/n’s best friend had been at his disposal this entire time, and he’d never thought to simply ask her.

Lorenzo turns to look at Daphne.

“Daph?”

“Yes Enz?”

“Does y/n fancy anyone?” He asks, trying to sound as casual and nonchalant as possible.

Daphne raises a brow.

“If you’re trying to subtly ask if I happened to know of her feelings towards you, you’re doing a lousy job."

Enzo pouts, sticking out his bottom lip and honestly looking quite pathetic.

"For Salazar's sake, what happened?" Daphne huffs, making herself comfortable on Theo's bed, much to his delight.

“Enzo is down bad. Obviously.” Mattheo states.

Daphne shoots the boy a glare, rolling her eyes at the curly haired boy.

"We've been working in the green house together, and I thought things were going so well. She was talking to me, and laughing and everything.” Enzo says, falling back into his bed dramatically.

“Well then what’s the problem? You like her I thought.” Daphne replies with an annoyed huff.

“That’s just it isn’t it? It wasn’t a problem. But then suddenly, a few days ago, she went completely cold again. Like the last couple weeks never happened." he laments.

Daphne opens her mouth. Then closes it, shutting her eyes and taking a deep breath. For the love of- she loved you. Truly she did. But you were going to be the end of her.

“I’ll take care of this.” She announces, promptly rising from the bed just as Theo was about to sneak an arm around her.

He glowers at Enzo who gives him an apologetic grin.

Daphne had been your best friend for years at this point, and most of the time, she was convinced that she knew you better than you knew yourself. She wasn't blind. Or dumb for that matter. She knew that there were some strong feelings between you and Enzo, though she had never really bothered to figure out if they were positive or negative. Clearly she should've and all of this could have been avoided she thought wistfully to herself. At least this explained the strange tension between the two of you as of late.

“Y/n.” Daphne huffs, sitting next to you on a bench in the court yard.

“Daph,” you greet, looking up from your book.

“So, when were you going to tell me that you fancy Lorenzo?” She asks, staring you dead in the eye.

You feel your mouth gape like a fish out of water.

“Right Daph. Like I’d ever fancy that peacock.” You reply, doing your best to appear disdainful.

“Don’t you get an attitude with me.” Daphne responds. She’d always been able to see right through you. “Enzo told me everything. The chatting. The giggling. The immediate turn around as if nothing had happened. Textbook case of realizing you like someone while being emotionally constipated!” Daphne announces.

“Shhh!” You hush your friend, glancing around to make sure no one had noticed the scene. “You know that being mean and sarcastic is my only defense mechanism!” You hiss.

“Oh honestly y/n. We both know you won't be able to use that excuse forever.” Daphne says with a dramatic eye roll. “Besides, he likes you too. Why do you think he’s always preening when you’re around. He’s trying to impress you, you dolt.”

“Fantastic. He’s only a prat when I’m around. How romantic,” you mutter.

“Well you certainly didn’t think he was being a prat when you were spending all that time in the green house together. Don’t think I didn’t notice you two disappearing for several hours. No one is spending that much time every day looking at flowers.”

“We were just talking,” you defend.

“Mmhm. And then you stopped talking because you got scared and now Enzo is a wreck.”

You feel a pang of guilt. You hadn’t meant to hurt Enzo. You hadn’t thought that he actually might like you too.

“I’ll apologize tomorrow in class, I guess,” you mutter.

Daphne sighs.

“Look. I’m not saying that you have to date him, or even tell him you like him. But you’re both my friends, and I don’t like seeing either of you upset.”

“I know Daph. I’m just confused is all. I thought I hated him.”

“Well, I’ve always been told that the line between love and hate is fine.” Daphne replies.

Bloody hell, when had your friend become this philosophic?

“I’ll get it sorted tomorrow. Promise.” You tell her.

Daphne nods, giving you a comforting smile.

“Good. And word of advice. Drop the sarcasm, Enz might cry if you put him through anymore emotional whiplash.”

Acceptance

You sat nervously in the potions classroom having arrived close to fifteen minutes early as you couldn’t shake away your nerves. Glancing at the clock on the wall, your classmates should start filing in at any moment.

You’d finally managed to gather all the need ingredients for your potion, so today would be the day that you and Enzo would be able to brew your amortentia.

Your fingers twirled the stems of the roses you’d collected mindlessly as your thoughts buzzed between your conversation yesterday with Daphne, and the fluffy haired brunette boy that had taken up permanent residency in your every thought.

Remembering the silly game one of your roommates had played years ago, you began plucking the rose petals off of the stem, one by one. You were going to have to do it eventually anyway. He loves me, he loves me not, the phrase repeats in your mind.

“Look nervous,” A voice comments from behind you.

Startled out of your thoughts, you look up just in time to see Enzo take his seat beside you.

Clearing your throat, you give the boy a small smile.

“Just thinking about the potion. Not going to be an easy one to brew today, and I’d like to get a good mark,” you reply.

“Of course.” Enzo replies, a strained look on his face. “Wouldn’t want to waste any more of your time then.”

You open your mouth to reply, but close it again when no words come to mind. Instead, you opt to sweep your rose petals into a small pile and begin shaving off the rose thorns as Enzo wordlessly takes out the gold cauldron, lighting a fire beneath.

“So,” you say awkwardly, the deafening silence finally getting to you. “How bout that weather?”

You hear a clatter as Enzo drops pestle he was holding to look at you incredulously.

“I know some of my conversation attempts were bad, but that was downright criminal.” He says with a snort.

Unable to hold back your laughter, you let out a giggle. “Yeah, I’ll see myself to Azkaban for that one.”

And just like that, the two of you fall back into your comfortable rhythm of idle chatter, jokes, bickering as you work seamlessly together.

You can’t help but watch with silent admiration as Enzo dutifully stirs the cauldron, careful to keep even counter clockwise strokes. A few tendrils of soft brown hair fall in front of the boy’s face and he gently blows them to the side with an annoyed puff.

“Pearl dust?” He asks, reaching his hand out.

As you hand him the vial, your fingertips brush softly, and you feel heat rush to your cheeks. The heat from the cauldron must be really getting to you.

“If you just want to add the powdered moonstone, we should be all done,” Enzo says after a moment, taking a step back to allow you to complete the final step.

Slowly, you approach the boiling cauldron, carefully sprinkling in your meticulously measured moonstone powder. You stir the concoction a bit longer until you see a familiar pearlescent sheen and swirling tendrils of steam.

“Think we’ve done it,” you say with a smile, looking over at your partner.

He grins back, joining you in leaning over the steaming cauldron.

“Well? What do you smell?” He asks cheekily.

“Wouldn’t you like to know.”

“We both take a wiff? On three?” Enzo asks.

You nod in agreement, watching the swirling colors within the cauldron. They say that amortentia smells like the things you’re most attracted to, and you’d always been curious what scents the potion would elicit for you.

“One, two, three.”

You lean in, and immediately you’re hit with the earthy scent of fresh soil, a soft hint of rose, and something else- oh. Oh. You feel your eyes widen.

“Peony. And vanilla.” Enzo murmurs, head still hovering above the cauldron before he turns to look at you.

The moment your eyes meet, you both know.

“I need a moment,” you mumble, hurrying out of the classroom.

As you rush past Daphne’s table, you hear the girl run after you into the corridor.

“What happened? Are you alright?” Daphne asks as the two of you come to a stop in a small alcove that’s somewhat hidden behind one of the many large stone statues that decorate the halls.

“It’s Lorenzo. My potion- it smells like Lorenzo. Or, it smells like fresh soil, and roses, and that stupid expensive cologne that he always wears,” you gasp, out of breath.

“Oh? And what did he smell?”

“Me. My perfume. Peonies and vanilla.”

“Well, that’s good then isn’t it? That you both smelled each other? I know when we talked yesterday I said you don’t necessarily have to tell the boy you fancy him, but, if you both really like each other that much. What’s the harm?” Daphne tries to reason.

“I don’t know! I just didn’t realize I liked him that much and it freaked me out. And I’ve been icing him out these past couple days, so he’s probably so cross with me. But he’s been so nice today, I don’t know what to do Daph. I’m not good with feelings. I was never going to act on anything!”

“Is that why you did all that? Back there?” A voice asks. “And why you’ve been acting strange the past several days?”

The two of you whip around to see Enzo staring wide eyed at the both of you, mouth slightly agape.

“I think I’d best let the two of you sort this out,” Daphne says, slipping out of the alcove and back into the classroom.

“I’m sorry, you weren’t meant to hear any of that,” you start as Enzo wordlessly approaches.

“You like me?” He asks once he’s close enough that you can feel the warmth radiating off of him. He looks genuinely surprised at the notion as he stares down at you intensely.

You nod slowly. “Smelled you in that bloody potion,” you mumble.

Enzo’s smile falls.

“Is it that bad? Liking me?” He asks, hurt written across his face.

“No! No it’s not! I just thought I didn’t like you- no, that’s not what I meant. I was surprised that I fancied you is all, and didn’t know what to do. Because we’ve know each other so long, and we haven’t necessarily always gotten along. And I didn’t really realize I liked you at first, and I got all freaked out and then I panicked, and-“

“Y/n, can I kiss you?” Enzo asks, interrupting your rambling.

You freeze, looking up at the boy in front of you.

“Yes please,” you murmur.

Without wasting another moment, Enzo’s lips meet yours with a hunger and passion you didn’t realize the boy had in him.

Any last trace of doubt or worry you had disappears as his soft lips move against yours, melting you into him like putty in his hands.

Right as you’re about to run out of air, you feel Enzo’s lips trail off to your cheek, placing gentle kisses as he trails down to your jaw, and then your neck.

“Enz,” you mumble softly as you feel the warm, sucking sensation against your skin in the crook of your neck.

“Shh,” he whispers, lips meeting yours once more.

You feel yourself getting lost in the sensation as he moves against you until Daphne��s voice brings you back to reality once more.

“Just so you’re both aware, we are still in class,” she calls from around the corner.

You feel your cheeks heat up as Enzo lets out a soft laugh above you.

“Rest assured love, we will be coming back to this later,” he says before placing a kiss on your forehead and leading you back into the classroom.

If there’s one thing about me, it’s that I’ll take any excuse to write a cheesy amortentia fic🤪

Special thanks to @finalgirllx and @pizzaapeteer for editing and rvwing🫶🏽

#hogmarch challenge #slytherin boys #harry potter universe #slytherin #lorenzo berkshire #theodore nott #matteo riddle #draco malfoy #enzo berkshire x reader #enzo berkshire #lorenzo berkshire x you #lorenzo berkshire x reader #Enzo Berkshire x y/n #daphne greengrass #pansy parkinson #amortentia #mattheo riddle #theo nott

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multifandomlover01 · 11 days

Text

Not Technically Mine…But Still Unequivocally Mine

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader (not AFAB specific)

WC: ~2.9k

Warnings: reader is undercover bait, very scummy suspect, very uncomfy situation and dialogue, touching, Spencer is concerned for her safety, biological male reaction mention, strangulation mention but not depicted, the b word is used to describe the reader, he spits on her too

Summary: (based off a post by @hereforhalstead and fic semi-requested by @ribbongrll) Reader has to go undercover as bait to lure in a suspect, and Spencer is not happy about it. He’s very protective and almost caused the mission to not be completed

Note: I envisioned post prison Spencer for this so it’s like S13-15 (JJ and Luke are in here), also third person and idk what’s happening with the tenses. Also a bit repetitive? Bit annoying?

Spencer absolutely fucking hated it whenever he had to be in a club or a bar for a case. It didn’t matter how much time he had to spend in the building. He got anxious and overstimulated very quickly. The only thing that made it worse was when some guy flirted with his equally as anxious female coworker (who was also his best friend who he was also in love with). Every time a guy would flirt with her while she just stood there, uncomfortable and silent, his heart broke. He’d glare at the guy and if he still didn’t take that hint, say something. Luckily, this usually took care of any further interaction.

Apparently the only thing worse than some guy flirting with his best friend/crush was her being bait for a suspect. She was his exact type, physically speaking and personality wise. Spencer almost immediately objected when he saw the form fitting and revealing dress that JJ had helped her pick out. But he doubted he’d be able to convince Prentiss and Rossi to ditch the plan. It was the best one they had. At least Spencer got to go undercover with her as her date…although he didn’t know if this actually would make the situation better or worse.

He didn’t even notice that his hand was brushing against hers the whole ride. He also didn’t notice that he was sweating a little bit.

“You’d better not do that in the club…you’ll give us away.” She teases and he doesn’t know what she’s talking about until he is suddenly physically aware of the perspiration.

He chuckles. “I won’t. Don’t worry.” He takes a handkerchief out of his pocket and dabs his face and neck.

They arrive at the club. He gets out of the vehicle and helps her out. He suppressed a groan when she tugs on her dress to futilely get it to cover more of her thighs. He gingerly grasps her hand and leads her inside.

“Remember…be your shy sweet self but not too reserved and reluctant because we need-”

“The suspect outside, yes, I know, Spence. We’ll be ok.” She chuckles as she looks at him.

“I just don’t want you to get hurt.” He frowns.

“You think I want to get hurt.” She furrows her eyebrows.

“Of course not.” He shakes his head, smiling some. “But it’s my job to protect you and…I don’t wanna fail.”

“I have to let him get me outside, isolated and alone so that JJ and Luke can apprehend him. You can’t protect me once I’m on my own with him.” She states what he was trying not to think about. She was right, though, of course.

“Just…be careful, ok?” He squeezed her hand.

“I will, don’t worry.” She squeezed his back. “Hey, I’ve done better for longer on my field training that you have, remember?”

“I remember when you had to help me pass my test to still be qualified to carry a gun and be in the field.”

“And now you don’t even need my help. You’ve gotten better and I’m proud of you. There’s always room for improvement…even for me. I’ll be fine. I promise.”

Spencer still wasn’t sure about this whole situation as they took a seat at the bar at the club. There was only one seat available. Spencer thought about letting her take it as the lady while he stood but then an idea he liked struck him. He sat down on the bar stool, took a hold of her waist and hoisted her up into his lap. He held her tightly to him as he had his arms wrapped around her waist.

“What’re you doing?” She asked, slightly confused by his behavior.

“I’m your date. I’m being…friendly.”

“That’s not why.” She huffs slightly.

“Alright…I’m protecting you, then.” His breath tickles her ear.

“Do I have to be in your lap?”

“I would say that…yes, you do.” He said rather definitively.

They ordered drinks (he made sure to order her a virgin cocktail so she had no actual alcohol in her system, not only was this regulation for an undercover agent, but he knew the last thing he wanted was for her cognition to not be at 100%). They sipped their drinks as she remained in his lap.

Spencer remained vigilant to his surroundings when she had to be more subtle about it to maintain her “oblivious” undercover role. He was grateful that it made sense for a girl’s date to want to ward off any potential girl stealers. He was not so grateful that the suspect did not care about that (even if the whole point of being bait and undercover as a couple was to lure him in to apprehend him).

It didn’t escape her notice that he’d tighten his grip around her whenever any guy got particularly physically close to her for whatever reason (even if it was as innocuous as standing beside her at the bar to order drinks) even if they didn’t even glance at her, let alone talk to her.

“You can relax some, you know. The suspect is going to be much bolder. You don’t have to spike your poor heart rate over every little thing.”

“I care about you. I won’t have you getting hurt.”

“We went over this. I’m perfectly capable of-”

“I know, I know you are, ok? It’s not…it’s not that.”

“Then what is it?”

“It’s-”

“Excuse me…” An overly charming and soft voice says, cutting Spencer off.

Their eyes immediately flit over to the man that had suddenly appeared. Spencer’s blood runs cold when he realizes that this is the man that matches the descriptions that the bartenders and patrons had given.

Spencer tenses, gripping her hips tightly as he holds her to him.

“I was just at that table over there and couldn’t help notice this…vision of loveliness right here.” He smiles as his hand rests on her knee. She cringes. Spencer’s blood boils.

“Don’t touch her.” He says in a dangerously low tone.

“Oh come on…I’m not gonna hurt the little lady. I’m merely…admiring her.” He steps ever so closer.

“Back off.” Spencer says, or rather…he grits it out. His grip on her hips tightens and she’s starting to wonder if they’ll bruise if he grips any tighter or if he does so for long.

“Oh come on…don’t be such a hard ass. What do you say, darling? How’s about…you and I…ditch this guy and I’ll show you a real good time.” Spencer wishes he could punch that stupid smirk off his face and break his hand as it slides further up her thigh. She’s squirming in his lap, pressing back into him (which doesn’t help another situation).

“You won’t. She’s clearly uncomfortable. You should take a hint and piss off.”

While she is in actuality very uncomfortable around this man, she knows she needs to get him outside.

“Well I…” She forces herself to scoot a bit off of Spencer’s lap and closer to the man. Spencer doesn’t loosen the grip on her hips and pulls her back against him.

“See? The lady here does seem interested.” His smirk hasn’t disappeared as his fingers are now at the hem of her dress.

Spencer has to fight between his instinct to get her as far away from this man as possible and his recognition of the mission. He just glares at the man. Reluctantly, he keeps his mouth shut.

“That’s it…listen to your girl here. Come on, honey. He seems like a real fun guy but…I promise to show you a night you’ll never forget. You’ll feel things you’ve never felt before.”

She scoots off Spencer’s lap a bit and he reluctantly loosens his grip. The man wastes no time sliding an arm around her waist and pulling her closer to him. She lets him lead her away. Spencer’s knuckles turn white against the bar counter as he sees the bastard caress her and then sees his hand move lower and squeeze her ass.

He just prays that she can keep herself safe with her training. She couldn’t wear a wire or anything. But he had one to inform JJ and Luke that they were on their way out to them. All he had to do was wait. He heard the confirmation that they’d made it outside and had been spotted by the agents placed there in the alley.

“Guys…tell me what’s going on.” Spencer murmurs into the mic.

“She’s fine. Just sit tight, Spence.” JJ tries to calm him down. It doesn’t work.

“Don’t tell me to just sit tight, JJ. I…I can’t just sit tight knowing she’s out there with that monster. You’ve got eyes on her. Please tell me she’s ok.” Spencer says pleadingly.

“She’s handling herself, man, ok? She’s capable.” Luke now tries to assuage Spencer’s fears. This also is not successful.

“That’s also not what I asked, Luke.”

Spencer hears Luke sigh. “He’s got her up against the alley wall, ok?”

“Well what’s he doing to her?”

“Spence-”

“What’s he doing?” Spencer insisted.

“Well he’s…fondling her…kissing her neck.”

“Jesus Christ…when are you guys gonna apprehend him? What if he hurts her?” Spencer is starting to get very concerned.

“We have to wait.”

“For what?! For him to strangle her?!”

“We need to wait until there is probable cause for an arrest. She’ll fend him off and he’ll push too far.”

“But how far? Does her dress have to be ripped? Does she have to be humiliated coming back in here?” Spencer was getting angry at his friends. They knew how much he cared about her. He didn’t often get like this.

“Just another minute or so, then we’ll go, ok?” Luke says, hoping again that this’ll calm him.

“Ok…only that…no longer. You can’t leave her with him for longer than that. Please…please protect her.” Spencer says softly.

“We will, Spence. We promise.”

“Thank you.” He sighs in relief.

It is indeed only another minute or two before go time, with JJ and Luke revealing themselves to the suspect. He is startled when two FBI agents with guns come out of the shadows. But before he can get angry and lash out at them, he turns that anger towards his potential victim.

“You…bitch!” He seethes, spitting in her face, causing her to gasp. This causes Luke to push him against the wall as he handcuffs him.

“Alright. That’s enough, buddy. We’re taking you in now.”

“You set me up? This was a set up?! I didn’t do anything! You pigs set me up!” He yells as Luke wrestled him over and into a squad car down at the end of the alley.

JJ comforts her briefly as she stands shaking slightly against the wall.

“Go back inside. Spence is quite anxious to see you.”

She chuckles. “Yeah, I bet.”

She wanders back inside the club, tugging her dress to get it back in place, wiping her smudged lipstick off, wiping the spit off as well.

Spencer is out of his seat like a rocket and bounding towards her the second he sees her enter the door she’d exited out of. He doesn’t say anything as he engulfs her in a tight embrace.

“I’m so glad you’re ok.” He whispered softly in her ear.

“I’m always ok.”

“You don’t have to be. It’s ok to not be ok.” He caressed her back.

“I know. But I’m ok.”

“What if…what if I’m not?” He holds her tightly to him. He buried his face in her neck.

“Why would you…not be ok? I’m…I’m fine.”

“You don’t understand, hon. This whole thing…has been near torturous for me. Watching that man…talk to you…flirt with you…touch you and knowing he was…” He’s shaking now and he doesn’t even realize it.

She caresses his back. “Hey…hey…it’s ok. I’m ok. It’s all over now.” She whispered softly.

“I just didn’t want you to get hurt. If that monster had hurt you…”

“Why don’t we get out of here, huh? I think we should go.”

“Fucking finally.” He groans as he wraps an arm around her waist and swiftly makes his way with her to the front exit of the club. He takes a nice deep breath once he’s exposed to the cool night air. He didn’t even realize how suffocating that environment was to him.

He helps her back into the vehicle as it’s brought around and still keeps her close to him as they head to the hotel to decompress for the night.

Once in the calm peaceful safety of the hotel room, he grabs his sleepwear from his bag and then gets hers for her as well. She had retreated to the bathroom to remove her makeup and take the dress off. Spencer enters the bathroom without knocking. He gets an eyeful of his best friend in her underwear and his face turns red.

“Oh um…I’ll just…leave these here. Sorry.” He puts her sleep wear on the counter and turns quickly to leave, shutting the door behind him.

He changes outside the bathroom in the room, still very embarrassed about his faux pas. He should’ve knocked. He just had so much on his mind at that moment that he’d completely forgotten to do it.

He occupied himself with a book as he sat up on the bed. His head lifts when he hears the bathroom door open. As beautiful as she’d looked in that dress and makeup, she looked infinitely more comfortable in her sleep wear and with no makeup. And because she seemed so comfortable and relaxed now, she somehow seemed even more radiant to him.

“Hey.” He says softly as he smiles at her. “Feeling better?”

“Much better. Thank you.” She smiles back at him as she sits on her own bed.

He looks over at her as she gets her own book out to relax. She goes to put her earbuds in her ear and he stops her. He knows she’s going to listen to music.

“You don’t have to put those in. You can just…play it from the phone.”

She looks over at him. “Really? You’re sure? I dunno how you’re gonna feel about some of the music.”

“It’s fine. I’ll listen to whatever you wanna listen to.” He shrugged. He very much wanted to relax and listen to music together with her instead of it seeming like they were doing it separately.

“Ok. Don’t say I didn’t warn you, though.” She chuckles as she puts her earbuds away and turns the volume up on her phone to prepare to play her music.

“It can’t be that bad.”

“You say that now.” She smirks as she presses play.

Classical music starts to play.

“What do you mean you warned me? That’s just Mozart!” He exclaimed.

“For now.”

“Oh for now.” He chuckles, shaking his head. “What’s next…Wagner? Don’t get crazy now.”

“Oh you just wait, Reid…just you wait.”

“Don’t tell me you have Hans Zimmer on there. That’d be really crazy.” He joked.

“Something wrong with movie and tv soundtracks?”

“No, not at all! I love them too. I’m merely amused at what you consider crazy.”

His smile falls when metal music starts playing. She laughs at his confused expression.

“I told you I warned you!”

“Now I’m concerned about what you consider relaxing.” He raises his eyebrows.

“I can always put my earbuds in.” She offers, pointing to them.

“No…no. It’s fine. Then I’d just be concerned for your hearing.” He shakes his head.

“You’re awfully concerned about me a lot of the time.” She notes, pausing the music.

“Of course I am. You’re my best friend. I care about you.”

“Well yeah but…how much?” She queried.

“What do you mean?” He cocks his head.

She scoffs. “You know what I mean, genius. Now answer the question.”

“Well…um…I suppose that…the answer is…a lot.” His gaze is averted from her.

“Spencer…look at me please.” She requests softly.

He obeys and his gaze lifts to meet here. “Yes?” He asks softly.

“Enough to almost blow our chance of catching that scum?”

He chuckled sheepishly, remembering what he’d done. “Yeah…that much.”

She puts her book down and stands up, going over to his bed. He looks up at her as she stands in front of him. She smiles down at him as she reaches up to cup his face. He smiles back up at her, letting her touch him. He wasn’t bothered by her touch.

“You were really scared, weren’t you?” She asks softly.

“I was terrified.”

“Even though I can handle myself?”

“I know you can. That wasn’t the issue. The issue was…” he trails off and his gaze averts briefly.

“Yes?”

“I couldn’t rationalize it in my mind. I knew you could handle yourself but that didn’t seem to matter. I was still scared. I couldn’t calm down. All of my nerves were on edge.”

“But why? If you knew I’d be fine…why worry?”

“Because…I care about you…because…because I think I love you. No…that’s not…I-I know that I love you.”

“You love me? Really?” She smiles.

“Oh absolutely.” He smiled back. “I think I have for quite a while now, I just…I just didn’t know how to express that to you. I could never…find the right words.”

“You couldn’t find the right words?” She chuckles lightly.

“Believe it or not, no. But I’ve…I’ve never been very good at expressing my feelings.”

“Well…the great thing about feelings is…you don’t necessarily need words to express them.”

“You don’t?” He looked at her quizzically.

She shakes her head. “No. You don’t. Actions work just as well.”

“Act-”

She cuts him off for the first time ever by leaning down to kiss him softly. He smiles softly and presses into the kiss. He’s waited so long to feel her lips against his. And it’s just as wonderful as he imagined it would be.

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid fanfic #criminal minds fanfic #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds fanfiction

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obbystars · 27 days

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It hurts to be something, it’s worse to be nothing with you.

NOTES: dividers by @cafekitsune !!

( Written before 2.2 / Kinda short tbh / Boothill may be OOC / not really angst as it turns into fluff tbh / I blame this / title was chosen because I was listening to the song at the time / GN!Reader )

It took a while for Boothill to even get used to this new life, or new body. Every time he looked at himself, he’s reminded of what was stolen from him. For a time, he hated his body. He sometimes wished he stayed dead. He feels so cold. He didn’t… He never wanted this, though as time passed, he grew accustomed to it. He eventually accepted it, but it never stopped those thoughts from worming their way back into his head.

He doesn’t quite feel… human. Nothing about him truly felt human.

“Boothill? You still there?” The voice was barely above a whisper.

“Hm?”

The gentle beating of a heart entered his ears. He felt warm. He felt a warm hand gently rubbing his face. Another hand was playing with a few strands of his hair before it was now gently brushing it. He opened his eyes, finding himself in an all too familiar room. One he had always looked forward to going back to once he finally had time to spare.

And underneath him? His favorite person, of course. Someone he always looked forward to seeing again, to spending more time with. He looks up at you, and you took note of his expression.

“Oh, sorry. Did I wake you up?”

He shook his head, burying his face into your chest and closing his eyes again, “No, no ya didn’t... Don’t worry ‘bout it,”

His arms were wrapped securely around your waist, trapping you in bed with him. You wiggled around in his grip for a bit to get a bit comfortable, resulting in you having to move him further up. His face was now in the crook of your neck.

Was he crushing you? Surely if he was, you would’ve said something or even tried to nudge him away. Were you cold? He hoped not… You did sometimes push him off of you because he was too cold. Sometimes he wishes he could provide you the warmth you always give him, but it’s not like he can feel it anywhere else other than his face. He hated that.

“You okay?” You questioned, your voice snapping him back to reality.

His answer was only a faint hum this time. He feels your hand brush his hair again, and you swear you can just feel him melt under your touch. It surprised you sometimes. A brash, flamboyant Galaxy Ranger, always full of energy and ready for the next journey across the stars almost turning into mush once your hands meet him. It was something you picked up on very quickly, and it didn’t take as long for you to realize why he reacts this way.

“Does it bother you?”

Your hands stop moving through the white strands, “Does what bother me?”

“This… My body. Does it-”

“No. Not at all,” you suddenly cut in, “You get cold sometimes, but that doesn’t bother me. Why do you ask?”

“…it’s nothin’,”

You turn your head to face him, nuzzling him knowing he can feel you there, “Well… It definitely is something, but… Whenever you’re ready, I’m all ears,”

He can feel you gently press a kiss on his head, and another, and another, and another. The only place where he can feel you, and you were practically showering him with small kisses.

He feels warm, especially when he’s with you. Maybe that’s why he always looks forward to moments like this with you because for once, even if it’s just for a moment, he feels human.

ehhh, this felt better in my head but oh well, I just really wanted to write Boothill

I don’t regularly post fics or hcs like this but maybe I’ll make a silly side blog for it if I do find myself wanting to write so much more for Boothill ( I literally love him so much )

#it was gonna be a frank sinatra lyric but it turned into laufey #i love laufey #the frank sinatra one was gonna be and then i go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like i love you #it sounded nice #honkai star rail boothill #hsr boothill #boothill x reader #boothill #honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #star rail #hsr x reader

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risestarkiss · 3 months

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Being Purple ○ Part Two

Rise Ramblings #315

Previous | Being Purple ○ Part One This post is a continuation, so I recommend reading Part One before reading this Part Two. ••••

We’ve talked about what Donatello was and his role in the family.

But, we never examined why. Why is Donnie so gung ho on physically providing for his family?

Well, to understand why he feels that way, we need to go back to the beginning. After Splinter and the turtles were mutated, Yoshi was obviously unable to access any of the funds or resources he held as Lou Jitsu due to, you know, him now being a giant rat. He had to start life a new from the bottom of society.

We don’t know what happened during their time on the streets, but we can make some inferences as to what happened next. Splinter eventually moved the boys down into the sewers and was able find a comfortable space for himself and his little family.

Here is where I’m going to try my best to piece together the order of events regarding Donatello’s earliest contributions. I’ll be using two episodes: the season one finale, “End Game,” and the Nick web exclusive mini-episode, “Turtle Tots.”

In Turtle Tots, the family has gathered in Splinter’s room. We can also see the den through Splinter’s doorway. This home is, indeed, the home that we are familiar with in the show. Thus, we now know that at this age the boys were already living in the sewers. We also know that the den has already been outfitted with a tv, electricity, and probably some kind of cable hookup.

Is it possible that Splints did this electrical work all on his own? “End Game” gives us a clue that can lead us to an answer.

Here he is, the boy of the hour. In this picture, given the perspective, young Donnie is much shorter than Splinter. Their heights here are actually comparable to their height difference in the “Turtle Tots” clip. Therefore, I believe it’s fair to conclude that Donatello is about the same height in both instances, and likewise, relatively the same age.

Given that new piece of information, now we can speculate further.

When you look at the room that crying Dondon is in, he’s surrounded by wires, batteries, boxes, and what appears to be little bits of tech that he was working on, hence the booboo. There’s a small rotary plane of some sort, a tiny workbench, and other bits and pieces. So, we can deduce that Donnie is familiar with electrical work and is building things for himself, even at this young age.

Donatello is already cooking.

With that evidence, I believe it’s reasonable to surmise that Donatello had a hand in hooking the den up with a refurbished TV and in wiring the house with electricity, which is such a big job for such a little guy.

If it had stopped there, I wouldn’t bring it up, but as we can plainly see…

It never stopped. His labors are endless. Everything from the turtles’ transportation, their living space, and their comforts at home was created, built, enhanced, and refurbished by Donatello. Consequently, he internalized the idea that his usefulness equated to the safety and security of his family. And that’s just how he lived his life.

He doesn’t know any different, and I’m sure at this point he wouldn’t want any different. This is his role. This is his place. Besides, his beneficence makes his brothers happy, and his father happy, and by extension it makes him happy.

Hence, his “gift giving” love language.

If Donnie is happy, then where’s the problem?

I’m sorry, but external validation as a primary source of happiness, or even worse, as a source of self-esteem, is dangerous…

But I digress…

From the outside looking in, it’s easy to assume that his genius is best utilized as a tool for the team’s benefit. But as a child, the weight of ensuring their entire family’s physical infrastructure is a large burden to bear…and it is almost the exact definition of Instrumental Parentification.

Parentification is a process in which a role reversal occurs where the child or adolescent is obligated to act as a parent would to their siblings or to their actual parent. Instrumental Parentification involves a child assuming the responsibilities of maintaining a household through physical means. In this case, Donatello literally maintains the household.

I’ve said all of that to say this.

Donatello has been subjected to Instrumental Parentification for almost his entire life. He doesn’t know life without providing for his family, but he’s happiest when his family is comfortable and safe.

So when we ask, why does Donatello make these sacrifices for his family, the answer is obvious. Love. And that answer reigns true in the past, present, and future…

Anyways, Donatello is such a complex and intriguing character, I could go on about him forever. But I think this as good a place as any to put a pin in my deep dive on this fiery little grape, because our next dive’s focus is on the true pinnacle of the Hamato clan…

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Previous | Being Big Red • Being Baby Blue • Being Purple ○ Part One

Next | Orange, Baby!

Finale | Being Hamato Yoshi

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entitled-fangirl · 3 months

Text

Sweet little nothings.

Felix Catton x reader

Summary: Felix does sweet things absentmindedly for the reader, making her fall more and more in love with him.

Words: 679

Warning: Talk of someone saying something rude, suggestive comment

Author's note: This is an ask based off of this wonderful post!

Masterlist <3

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“Did you eat today, angel?”

It was a genuine question, one that Felix asked often. His beautiful girl looked up from her book, a slight blush on her cheeks.

“Oh, uh… I…. I don’t think so.”

He leaned back in his chair, a small smile on his face. She was too precious. Too sweet. She couldn’t even remember to eat she was so invested in the day’s activities.

He stood, grabbing her wrist gently to pull her up next to him. He then pulled her against him, kissing her gently on the nose, his voice a low whisper. “D’wanna eat here or out?”

She looked up at him, meeting his pretty brown eyes with her own. “…out? I… I need out of the house… if that’s alright?”

He grinned, “That’s more than alright, angel. Go get your coat.”

She didn’t hesitate to do so. She pulled the jacket around her, fumbling with the zipper hurriedly.

He walked to her calmly, placing his hands over hers. “I got it.” He then easily zips her coat for her. His arms wrap around her neck, fixing the hood. “There, angel. You ready?”

…

The two sat in the restaurant, quietly enjoying their meals.

“So… he said what to you?”

She shrugged. “It was stupid. I don’t think about it often.”

His eyebrows pull together as he sets his fork down, “Well, does it bother you?”

She sighs, twirling her own fork in her hand, “It did at the time. Now? I don’t know, Lex. It’s fine.”

It was his turn to sigh as his hand moved up to cradle her cheek gently. “It’s not fine if it bothers you, angel. He shouldn’t have said that.”

She stares at the nearly empty plate in front of them, a distant look in her eyes.

His thumb moves up her cheek, lightly brushing a crumb from her face. “I mean it. Say the word, and I’ll make sure he apologizes. Truly.”

She lets out a soft laugh, “It was almost a year ago, Lex. He probably doesn’t remember.”

“Oh, he will when I remind him.” He lifts his fork, stabbing the last piece of their shared steak. He holds it out in front of her face. “C’mon. You need the protein.”

She leans forward slightly, her lips wrapping around the fork, taking the piece graciously.

He smiles, “Let’s say we pay the bill then head back to Saltburn. I have a little surprise for you, angel.”

She was thrown off, but agreed nonetheless.

…

The servants opened the front doors to the mansion, letting the couple walk in. She happily let him pull her to one of the many living areas, this one in particular being his favorite one.

He pulls her in front of his body to give her the first view before his arms move over her shoulders, pushing the doors open.

A huge bouquet of flowers sat on the coffee table near the couch. Her favorite snack sat on a tray next to it. She was speechless. “You… you did this? For… me?”

He wore the happiest grin. “Indeed, I did. Well, Duncan helped, of course. Now, go on, angel.”

She walked further into the room before she stopped again. Her favorite movie sat on the TV, waiting to be watched. She spun around to look at him. “Lex, this is incredible! But… why?”

He shrugged moving to pull her into his arms again. “Don’t need a reason. Just wanted to. Besides, I know you’ve been wanting me to watch this movie, and what better way to do so?”

She hugged him tightly before whispering in his ear, “If you keep this up, I don’t think we’ll be watching much of the next movie.”

He grinned, pulling her to the couch to begin their movie night together.

…

Duncan came in once to check on the couple.

The girl lay against the boy, her head resting on his chest as she slumbered. The boy, however, continued to watch the movie reverently, his fingers moving in her hair as if a natural instinct.

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#felix catton #fanfiction #felix catton imagine #felix catton x reader #felix catton x you #jacob elordi imagine #jacob elordi x reader #saltburn fanfiction #saltburn 2023 #saltburn #saltburn movie #jacob elordi

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outro-jo · 1 year

Text

kissing skz goodbye

pairing: skz x reader

type: reaction

warnings: none

a/n: please read info before requesting update: if you saw that pic of felix before, no you didn’t. upon further investigation that was not even felix and pinterest has done me dirty. this is why we don’t look for photos and post at like 1am 🙃

masterlist | info

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chan- it’s amazing chis was even asleep but he was and you know that if you left before him and didn’t kiss him that he’d pout about it all day. did he jump a little? yes but he melted right into your lips in no time. he let out a groan, his voice still raspy with sleep. his arms wrapped around your waist and because he was so much stronger than you, your body fell right into his.

“i’m not gonna let you go just yet.”

lee know- this was purely to annoy him. he HATES being woken up but nonetheless you had to do your job as a partner. you gave several pecks in a row, lingering longer on the last one. to your surprise a hand came up to the back of your head and the kiss was deepened.

“do this again and i’ll kill you.”

changbin- will also pout if he doesn’t get a kiss before you go to work. you’ll get texts throughout the day teasing that you don’t love him and how could he possibly be with someone so cruel. so to save yourself the headache on such a busy day, you leaned down and gave him a gentle kiss on his cheek. as you turned to walk out, a hand caught yours at the last second and you heard him whine.

“nooo, kiss me properly, baby.”

hyunjin- kisses were spread all throughout your morning routine. when you first opened your eyes and rolled over, you brushed his hair back to admire his beautiful features in sleep before softly kissing them. then a quick peck after your shower on your way to change. lastly, a long kiss to his lips that finally causes him to stir and then return the kiss.

“have a good day, my love.”

han- you know better than to leave a room let alone the house without kissing your boyfriend goodbye. your kisses are like a drug to him and he can’t go more than a few hours without begging for them. you give him a kiss to each cheek to wake him slightly, gently letting him know what’s coming next. his lips poke out while his eyes are still closed. letting you know he’s ready for you and you lean down once more, giving him a final kiss before you have to go.

“i love you, baby.”

felix- lix is so stunning when he sleeps. his bare face littered with freckles and relaxed features looking younger in sleep. you almost hate to wake him up even a little but you can’t help but to kiss him before you leave. not only would he be upset if you didn’t but your heart would ache without one last kiss. your hand rests on his cheek, stroking it with your thumb as you lean down. felix isn’t scared or even fazed by your affections. instead he kisses you right back and reaches up to keep you in place for a little longer.

“such a perfect way to wake up.”

seungmin- sleep is such a precious thing to seungmin but if he was honest, you’re even more precious. the first time you left for work before he was up, you got to hear about it when you got home that evening. he wasn’t really sulking or anything, but was just talking about your absence like it was fact. you got the idea. from then on you remembered to kiss him goodbye. the room was still dark as the curtains were drawn and you leaned over him, pushing his hair off his forehead before kissing his lips. you felt him smile before kissing you back.

“bye, darling.”

jeongin- though he can sleep though anything, jeongin still knows when you leave without kissing him. you joke that it’s like kissing a mannequin but he insist you do it anyways. this morning was a little different because he had just returned home from tour and wanted to savor every moment he could with you. it surprised you when his lips moved against yours and his hand came up to caress your cheek. his nose nuzzling yours as your lips parted to still keep you close to him.

“i’ve missed this.”

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beardedjoel · 5 months

Text

smother - part iii: compliance

dark!joel x f!reader

series masterlist | main masterlist | ao3 | kofi

summary: the deeper you fall into his trap, the further you start to lose a sense of what you really want. 10.4k words chapter warnings: 18+ MDNI! noncon, nonconsensual touching, dubcon - reader eventually enthusiastically consents but the syndrome is stockholming so its dubcon, coercion, reader is a virgin, big juicy age gap (reader is 19, joel is 55), ddlg (no infantilization of reader) daddy!dom joel is coming out to play this chapter, fingering, handjob, joel's corruption kink confirmed here, joel is both mean (hurts reader briefly) and sweet once again, if these darker tags aren't your cup of tea please keep scrolling! a/n: oh we're SO back with some smut this chapter! this story has me pushing my own limits on creativity and stuff and that has really been rewarding so far, i love it and i love dark!joel. anyhoooo please enjoy my lovelies 🤍 reminder i have no taglist anymore! follow @beardedjoel-updates and turn on notifs for when i post there!

It’s okay it’s okay it’s okay…

Joel’s words echo in your ear from where they were whispered moments ago as he pressed himself into you from behind, urging you up the stairs towards his bedroom. One hand gripped firmly on your upper arm, the other on the small of your back, fingers exploring along your bare skin. You turn back once more with worried, widened eyes as you reach the top of the steps and he presses against you again, nearly pushing you.

“I got ya, sugar” he says quietly, stopping for a moment to nuzzle into your neck before pushing you along. The new pet name he’s trying out makes you blink a few times, half liking the sweet implication. His deep breath in and out tickles your skin and you suddenly feel itchy from his facial hair scratching there. Panic claws its way up from your stomach, suddenly unsure of everything, like you’re just snapping out of the stupor you were in from Joel’s lips.

Joel had made you feel good downstairs just moments ago, giving you that first, unforgettable kiss. It was so much more hungry and wet and passionate than you’d ever envisioned a kiss being, and it made you feel even more anxious that you truly were out of your depth here.

You’ve managed in your fog to pad your way to Joel’s bedroom with him close behind you, his heat seeping into your skin, his body close enough to morph right into yours. He spins you immediately to face him and starts to kiss you again the moment you’re inside his bedroom. After just a moment of surprise, you fall right back into it, his tongue dancing a perfect rhythm against yours and you whimper and moan quietly. You find your body wanting to be closer closer closer to him so you wrap your arms around his neck, fingers grazing right against the curls at the base of his neck.

Joel pulls back to smile down at you, a wicked thing as his eyes glint before he dives back in. He’s devouring you, hands all over your body as if he doesn’t know which spot to get enough of next. He’s suddenly lifting you up, large palms spread underneath your thighs as he hoists you up against him, carrying you so that you don’t have a chance to stop him from bringing you to his bed.

That same bed you’d seen him just hours earlier, the moment that had started this fucked up chain of events you’d fallen into.

“There we go, jus’ relax,” Joel coos as he lays you down flat, your head right against the mattress. He climbs on top of you, trapping you completely before his lips smash into yours again. He’s taking now, giving you no room to push back or speak as his tongue laps into your mouth over and over, hearty groans escaping him. Sounds that a famished man makes eating his favorite meal. It makes you shudder, the way you’ve started to feel like his meal, like something he could just enjoy and toss away the scraps he leaves afterwards.

“Christ, so fuckin’ innocent, sugar. I’ll teach you so many things to do w’that tongue,” he comments slyly after you hesitantly try to use your tongue in the same way as he was. Joel’s lips drag down your chin to your neck and start to suck on various spots, a little soft at first to test you but more hurried and rough the longer he goes. His body grinds against yours a bit and you lay back, feeling breathless. Your body burns and burns as he marks you and moves against you, your thighs aching all the way to the apex.

You squirm a little bit, a foreign discomfort completely taking over, and Joel pulls back to look down at you. He strokes the side of your head from your forehead all the way back, looking at you with warmer eyes.

“Gonna be okay, I’ll show ya how good you can feel…” he murmurs as his fingers start to trace along your bottom lip. “Now I’m gonna peek at a little more of ya,” he announces before sliding down your tense body, straddling your legs before hooking his fingers in your sweatpants. They’re down and shoved off your legs before you can even process it, leaving you in just a pair of plain white panties. His eyes roam up every inch of your body, white heat flickering low in your belly at the way Joel looks at you.

“Now that’s a sight…” He smirks, sliding his hands up your thighs to rest on your hips, treating each spot he touches with a new reverence. You’ve started to tremble a little, the chilly air biting at you along with this vulnerable feeling, being so exposed.

“Y-you like the way I look?” you ask tentatively, having to clear your throat from lack of use. Your sudden urge for validation from him strikes you hard and you silently curse yourself.

Joel smiles at the unexpected question from you and gives you a singular nod. “‘Course I do. You’re real beautiful, sweetheart. ‘Specially like this.” His eyes land between your legs as he says the last words, licking his lips out of habit. He slinks up next to you, laying close to you and wrapping an arm around you, enveloping you in everything Joel.

“Now don’t ya feel safe here like this? Got me right here holdin’ you, gonna make it all okay.”

You just nod, swallowing the anxious lump in your throat. “I’m… just scared…” you admit, willing your cheeks to stop burning hot with all the emotions swirling around inside of you. Desire, embarrassment, discomfort, doubt - all mixing up to create a disastrous thundering of your heart inside of your chest.

“Baby, nothin’ to be scared of…” Joel coos, kissing your shoulder and peppering them across the top of your chest as he leans over your body.

“You’re not gonna hurt me?” you wonder aloud. You’d heard stories through the grapevine of other girls - fearful stories of pain or blood that had nearly revolted you at the time, made you almost glad there were no men paying that type of attention to you just yet. You’d always hoped they were just exaggerated tales, and you suppose you’re finally about to find out for yourself.

“I’ll be honest, sweet girl. This might hurt a little bit. Just ‘cause it’s your first time.” His lips suckle at the swell of your breast and you squirm a little, back arching into it as your breath hitches. You try to focus back on his words as his lips move an inch and do the same motion, a gentle sucking so close to your nipple now that you nearly puff your chest in his direction, hoping his mouth will land there next.

“But it’s such a special kind of love a man can show ya on your first time, darlin’. Get to have all of you…” he muses, his warped excitement becoming more palpable by the second, filling the room and stifling the air. “I’ll be gentle,” he adds on as he sees another spark of fear on your face.

“You’ll be gentle…” you repeat quietly, squeezing your eyes shut in some type of silent prayer. You feel the needle-like prickle of tears behind your eyes again, begging yourself to do anything but cry right now. You dig your nails deep into your palms, squeezing your fists tight to keep the pain there instead of burning deep in your stomach where it’s settled.

How can you be this close to all of it and still so unsure? Would you ever be sure? Or is this how everyone feels during their first time?

Joel finally pops one of your nipples into his mouth, sucking harder while his hand plays with your free nipple, rolling it between his fingers. You cry out at the unexpected sensation and wriggle your body, only to be held down a little harder by Joel.

“Mm-mm,” he hums, “No squirmin’ away.” His mouth quickly finds a home on your breasts again as you try to still your body, not wanting to make him upset. You’d seen how he behaved when he was upset with you, and it was not something you found yourself wanting to repeat.

”Pretty little nipples, sweetheart,” Joel says, talking at your chest while he flicks his tongue on the hard bud, unrelenting in his tasting of your sweet, supple skin. “Look at ‘em all day if I could. Half a mind to have you walk ‘round w’your tits out all the time.” He chuckles dryly before he sucks again, a little harder and you bite back the gasp that sticks in your throat at the jolt of pleasure it sends rocking through your body. “You’d do that f’me, wouldn’t you? Jus’ to get a little of ‘ol Joel’s attention?”

His words make you itchy, almost, in a strange, foreign way, one that’s hard to explain even to yourself. Like you want to crawl out of your skin, yet want to hear his words over and over, hear more of the things he sees in you, would want from you. You’d never found yourself to be someone with much to offer anyone, really, and hearing Joel already find so much to dote on is inflicting you with the most unexpected addiction you could have imagined.

You feel Joel’s fingers squeeze your chin suddenly, your eyes flicking open to glance down at him. “Answer me when I’m speakin’ to you,” Joel says softly despite the commanding tone of his words.

“I - yes,” you answer, tripping over the single word as you push it out in a hurry.

“Good girl,” he murmurs in response, leaning up to peck a kiss on the spot on your chin he’d been gripping. “Now you’re gonna let me make you feel good, ain’t ya? Let me treat you like a princess, show you what all the other men shoulda done but were too dumb. Chance with a pretty girl like you,” he rambles with a little scoff. “All meant f’me, anyways.” His conclusion seems to satisfy him as he grins, taking in your body with a hot gaze, lingering at the base of your stomach where his hands are itching to go. He doesn’t wait for your answer this time, sliding his hand right down, skillfully touching your soft skin the entire way.

Joel’s fingers start to trace the band of your panties, that satisfied grin still plastered on his face as he watches your reactions - your little sharp inhales and small twitches of your face as you feel him exploring your body. His eyes can’t help but drift down to watch your chest heave, pert tits on display and abused, hard nipples poking out into the air. He has a tempting thought to spend his entire night with his face buried right there, but he has more pressing matters to get to, he reminds himself as he feels his cock twitch inside his jeans.

He suddenly sighs as he pads the outside of your underwear, his face nearly pained looking in his ecstasy. “You’re soaked f’me, sugar,” Joel says, breathless. You feel yourself flush hot, your cheeks burning, thinking this has to be something to be embarrassed about, something that shows your lack of experience and your fear.

“‘S not a bad thing,” Joel tells you quickly, seeming to read your mind yet again. He doesn’t stop, his fingers teasing the fabric that starts to seep onto his digits. “Means you like all this, means your body is tellin’ us you’re ready.”

“Oh,” you say flatly, feeling dumb for not having much better to say. “I- uh, are you going to do it now, then?”

Joel chuckles, a genuine sound ringing through the quiet room, like he’s amused. “Christ,” he breathes out, swirling his fingers along the fabric, making your hips jump as he brushes your bundle of nerves. “You’re too cute, so perfect f’me. I get to teach you everythin’.”

Your brain can barely register his words, too focused on that little spasm that had just rocked its way through your body when Joel’s fingers touched along that sensitive spot. You blink, biting your lip as his fingers tease everywhere but there, silently urging him to brush there again.

Joel huffs another laugh watching your contorted, concentrated face. “Already fucked out, can’t think about nothin’ but these fingers, huh?” he teases you, amusement lacing his voice. His fingers make a tight circle over your clothed clit and you inhale sharply through your teeth, stifling a little noise from deep in your chest. “That what you wanted? Jus’ desperate f’me to touch your clit, sugar?”

You shake your head, completely overwhelmed by the absurdity of this feeling. “I don’t - I don’t…” you murmur, trying to convince yourself for what feels like the final time that you don’t want any of this. That you don’t feel an amoral, wicked pull towards this man that you shouldn’t - this man who has treated you like prey, is far too old to be interested in you, who by all accounts should be sending you fighting and running. A man you know likely has debased plans for you that you can barely even conjure up in your own mind, but plans that you are slowly realizing you want to be a part of, are curious about.

His care, his touch, his infatuation. They could all be yours, if you’d let him.

“Think you do… look at you, innocent little thing. Wrestlin’ w’yourself. Nothin’ wrong happening here, honey.”

You look to his dark eyes, seeking guidance, reassurance. “I-it’s not? I feel so…” You can’t put any of it into words for him, how intense the feeling is, how badly your body is craving something that you don’t know anything about yet. How dirty you feel for wanting it with him.

He shakes his head slowly to try and convince you. “Mm-mm. I feel it too, sugar. ‘S jus’ attraction, desire. Makes you burn all hot in here, don’t it?” he asks, cupping your aching, wet cunt through your panties. You gasp at the fullness of his hand against your throbbing folds while you nod fervently, taking in a deep breath to steady yourself as his fingers curl and then drag up your clothed slit. Your head arches back a little and you let out a tiny mewling sound through closed lips. Your mind muddles instantly, eyes rolling back as he repeats the motion, this time letting his fingers trail off to the edge of your panties, teasing the hem there.

“Thas’ it, let yourself enjoy it, princess. Let daddy take care of you.”

He’s barely controlling himself now, his breath heavy against your neck as he starts to move with more urgency, teeth scraping against your delicate skin. Your brow furrows quickly at the new reference to himself but his teeth sink into your flesh with a soft nip, pulling your mind back to the present.

“You’re gonna like this,” he murmurs quietly into your skin as his fingers fiddle one final time at your waistband before wiggling under, diving deep and sliding his fingers right into your wet slit.

“Oh… m-my, g-“ you whimper as quietly as you can when he slips them back and forth a few times, brushing your clit on each one, gathering up a lewd amount of slickness on his fingers. He spreads your wet folds delicately, feeling his way around almost respectfully, desperate breaths puffing out of his nose.

“Poor baby… soakin’ yourself this whole time… never even knowin’ how good you could feel, how much y’need a cock in here,” Joel says, sounding truly devastated for you. His brazen language makes your head spin and your cheeks flourish with warmth. And then it finally happens - his fingers swirl over your clit again.

You cry out loud this time, unable to hold it back when his circling tightens and he puts more pressure down on the aching little bud. The heat from between your legs starts to spread to your lower belly, pulling taut and warm as it settles there.

“Oh…” you murmur, back arching when Joel adds a second finger to the motion. Your legs shake a little as they lay flat on the bed, knees starting to bend of their own volition to help your hips start to wriggle closer to his touch. You stutter out another moan when his fingers press harder, the feeling shooting what feels like sparks through your entire bloodstream, straight to your head. You’re foggy, thoughts clouded over as everything else starts to fade out. Your mind pinpoints on Joel’s touch, practically seeing just his fingers in your mind's eye and the sensation that’s quickly boiling in your core, tightening with each movement he makes.

“Yeah, feelin’ so good ain’t you princess?” Joel coos with a grin, making his movements a little faster. “First one to touch this little clit, first one to see ya like this, writhin’ around like an animal in heat. God…” He marvels at your microexpressions, the contortions of your body, the way he can see you’re holding back, not wanting to seem too eager.

“Let go, sweetheart. Be loud f’me. Be loud f’daddy,” Joel urges you, eyes practically bugging out of his head as he sees you start to sheen a little with sweat, your body hot and tingling next to him. He smirks as he slips a finger down, eliciting a desperate cry from you when it leaves your clit to tease your entrance.

“D-daddy…” you start, meaning it as more of a question, wanting to understand what he’s getting at, but it trails off into a pathetic little cry when the tip of his index finger pushes into you unexpectedly.

Joel has died and gone to heaven, if his expression is any indication as he breathes out shakily, hardly in control of his actions at this point. “Thas’ right, thas’ right, princess. Call out f’me while I’m inside ya.”

“F-fuck,” you let slip out. “Y-you’re inside?” you ask him in slight disbelief that it’s really happening. You go completely breathless as he starts to play with your clit again, using his thumb to flick urgently there while he lets his finger settle inside of you.

Joel wriggles his finger deeper, burying his index finger almost to the hilt as he nods, turning your head with his free hand to make sure you’re looking at him.

“Naughty little thing, cursin’ cause daddy made you feel that good.” He smirks, letting you sweat it out for another moment before answering your question in a softer voice, almost sweet and caring. “‘M inside, sugar. Feels so fuckin’ good, too. Perfect, tight little hole all f’me.”

You’ve become a trembling mess, the fullness from Joel’s finger overwhelming you. The tingling warmth spreads to your belly from where he starts to move his finger, slowly at first.

“Yeah, there we go, takin’ me so well,” Joel mumbles as you relax around his finger, pressing in and out in sloppier motions. You gasp when his finger presses in to the hilt, then he repeats it over and over, filling you up. Your hips twitch and grind a little into him, into the feeling of his thumb flicking carefully at your clit.

“O-oh…” you whimper out, gushes of warmth coating Joel’s finger, running down onto his hand. He grunts an approving noise as he feels the way your body pours out slickness for him. This is pure heaven, he concludes to himself, nothing in the world could be sweeter than the feeling of taking this from you and getting so much in return.

“Christ, you are perfect,” he says near your ear. “This okay, princess?”

You just give him a nod, barely able to speak as your entire body starts to feel warmer and drawn tight, Joel’s finger on your clit moving at an achingly slow pace.

“Gonna feel somethin’ for just a second, mkay?” he says quietly, not bothering to clue you in any further before retreating his index finger and snuggling his middle finger right next to it, inserting them both into your weeping entrance.

Joel breathes a sigh, the air fanning across your bare chest. “Mmm, so tight, baby. Thas’ it, just focus right on me,” he says as your eyes open wide and look right into his. You feel the burn from his second finger, so thick and wide in comparison, your body adjusting to the new sensation.

“J-joel…” you whimper quietly when he starts to move them with more force, your brow furrowing with the strange mixture of pain and pleasure.

“Y’need to relax, c’mon,” he urges, using his free hand to rub gentle circles on your shoulder. “Promise we’ll get you feelin’ real good, sweetheart. We gotta get you all stretched out to fit all ‘f me.” He rubs a soothing hand on your shoulder with his free one, shushing you when he sees the look of worry on your face.

“Jus’ enjoy it.”

His words echo in your mind as you start to fully embrace all the sensations. You feel a burning heat in your core start to radiate, pulling tight, so tight it’s nearly maddening before your hips shift the tiniest bit and find your release, the tightness completely snapping from one moment to the next.

“Oh my god… oh my god… oh…” you cry out, feeling yourself starting to shake, your entire body ravaged by oncoming waves and waves of pleasure.

“Look at me when you come, princess,” Joel says sternly as he grasps your face, turning your head in his direction. You slowly creep your eyes open and see his dark pools full of a sense of smugness and wonder. “God, fuck, that’s good, keep comin’ f’me,” he breathes out, feeling your slick pouring out onto his hand as you come.

You’ve never felt so amazing in your entire life, the only thought you can think is more more more as you moan loudly, any shame in doing so long gone when you feel this incredible. White heat envelops you, sending your vision speckled and your back arching off the bed completely, your hips spasming down to where Joel sloppily yet expertly fucks you with his fingers. You grip at the sheets with one hand, Joel’s shirt with the other, squeezing them both to try to hang on to reality.

“Good girl, good little girl… god you’re pretty when you come,” Joel says, talking you through it. His fingers are merciless until the last second, when your hips drop to the bed with a sudden thud, your entire body limp, only your hips jumping with a need to get away from the overstimulation.

“Oh, that was a big one, now, wasn’t it?” Joel asks softly, pulling his hand from between your legs and resting it on your thigh, his other still soothing on your cheek. Your eyes flutter and roll back as you catch your breath, trying to wrap your mind around what just happened.

“Uh-huh…” you murmur dazedly, your hand still resting on Joel’s chest after letting go of his shirt.

Joel peppers your face with soft, loving kisses, finally reaching your lips and kissing you deeper. You’re lost, somewhere in another dimension completely, kissing him back without any knowledge of doing so. The warmth of his lips starts to bring you back and you flutter your eyes open as he pulls back.

“Y’did real good. How’d that feel, huh, sugar?” Joel inquires, looking down at you expectantly.

“S-so… good… I can’t explain…”

“Mhm, I know what ya mean,” he replies sweetly, “Hard to explain, jus’ all that pleasure. Loved makin’ you feel that good, honey.” Joel leans in to kiss your cheek, using his hand to tilt you towards him and plants another kiss on your lips. You moan quietly, body overstimulated and exhausted, the now empty space between your legs aching and tingling for him.

You roll your head back onto the pillow, unable to respond. Joel places a hand over the one of yours that rests on his chest and rubs his thumb over the back.

“Gonna make you feel like that all the time,” he says with an oddly devoted, sweet tone, leaning down and surprising you with another kiss. Your eyes open again and he’s looking at you with that look again. “So much more we could do,” he adds, shifting his smile into something more hungry again.

“Wh-“ you start to ask, and Joel’s finger touches your lip gently. You can taste the remnants of yourself on it - such a strange, foreign flavor that makes you smack your lips a little. Joel’s amusement at your response shows quickly on his face as he traces his finger along your lips with a soft smile.

He starts to sit up and lean back on the bed, sending your hand dropping from his chest, a quick bounce on the mattress before it stills. His hands reach to his waist, fingers working at his belt. You stare, eyes transfixed on his every move as your heart starts to beat more quickly, anxiety flooding your system as you toil over what comes next.

“Ain’t done with you yet, sweet girl,” he mumbles, belt now hanging loose and open while he palms himself outside of his jeans. Your mind races at the prospect of seeing what you saw from afar this morning just this much closer. Joel reads your deer in the headlights expression and smirks, head cocked as he looks down at you, sitting next to you on the bed, knees pushed into the mattress.

You swallow hard, the apparent lump sliding down your throat and it makes your cheeks burn how openly nervous you are. Joel strokes a hand gently down the side of your head before pushing off the mattress and standing next to the edge of the bed.

“Time f’you to see a real man, in all his glory,” Joel says, teasingly, like he knows something you don’t. And he does, you suppose, know a lot of things that you don’t in this regard.

He starts to peel off his jeans, letting them pool by his ankles, belt buckle clanging all the way down before he steps out of them. He has on a pair of dark boxer briefs, hard to tell if they’re black or navy in the fading evening light of his bedroom. All you can focus on is the apparent bulge there, knowing what’s underneath, that shockingly large part of him he’d stroked earlier because of you.

He wastes little time pulling his shirt over his head, revealing his hulking, muscular form, soft yet hard, toned and strong but fleshy and dusted with salt and pepper curls of hair, leading right down to the waistband of his briefs.

Your eyes flick from between his thighs to his face, searching his eyes for any kind of assurance, any kind of assistance in how to act, what to do next. He just remains as cocky as ever, hand grazing the outside of the tented fabric as he stares down at you with hooded eyes.

“You wanna see it, babygirl? Wanna touch daddy’s cock?” He rubs himself a little faster, a tiny growl suppressed in his chest while he awaits your answer. “Know you do, know you’re such a curious girl.”

You unstick your tongue from the roof of your mouth and nod, swallowing hard again. “Y-yes, I want to see,” you finally say, meek and shaky, shrinking in on yourself like you’re preparing for a bomb to go off, afraid of what you’re about to witness. In what feels like a flash, his briefs are down on the ground, Joel’s cock springing free almost violently as it slaps against him. You stare for a moment, taking in the way it juts out from his body - rock hard, shiny pink head dripping and veins running along the length of him. You feel speechless, unsure if there’s something you’re supposed to say when a man shows you his penis.

“C’mon a little closer, princess, you can look, s’okay,” Joel says, calm and quiet. “Crawl over here.”

You hesitate a moment and push yourself up on the bed to get on your hands and knees. While it’s not a far distance, just a few paces and you’re to the side of the bed where Joel stands, he revels in the sight of you doing it, his lip caught between his teeth as he gently plays with himself.

“Pretty girl,” Joel murmurs when you reach him, putting his hand along the back of your head and stroking once before holding on to keep you in a position to stare directly at his cock. It’s threateningly large right in your face like this, and you feel yourself shudder a bit as you watch Joel’s free hand gently touching all along the length.

“Now, I want y’to touch it, can you do that, sweetheart?”

You hand hovers, your teeth sinking into the inside of your cheek as you peer at his member with a lack of confidence.

“C’mon now,” Joel says, grabbing your wrist, moving your stalled, floating hand to his cock, settling your fingers on the head. Your stomach turns with the strangeness of all of this - the way you had given in to him and now felt like it was impossible to go back. Joel is gently nudging your hand, trying to urge you to move, and it brings you back to the present moment where you blink hard and focus on him again.

“Sh-should I do this…?” you ask quietly, letting your fingers graze the head in a swirling motion, unintentionally picking up the beads of precum leaking out and you nearly pull back. Joel chuckles at your brief reaction to the liquid, then nods.

“That’s good, real nice,” he says softly. “Touch it all over now, no need to be shy with me, okay?”

You press your lips together, unable to even look him in the eye due to your strange combination of being flustered and mortified. You can only find yourself staying focused on what you’re doing with your hands, making sure it’s right for him.

“What did I say about answerin’ me when I’m speaking to you?” Joel says a moment later, tugging on your hair to lift your gaze up to his. You wince, wishing he’d be a little more gentle with your scalp, and he sees your expression and only tightens his grip.

“I-I’m s-sorry. Um…” you take a deep breath, trying to calm your quaking hands. “Like this?” you ask him, using your fingertips to glide down the length of his cock, all the way to the base where a patch of thick curls sits. That seems to please him, a kinder smile on his face now when he nods in approval.

“Lean forward and spit right on there f’me,” he says, looking down at you and gesturing between his thighs. “Need to get it nice and wet f’daddy to feel good, okay?”

Your mouth hangs open in a stunted silence, your body unable to move without his assistance right now as he drags your hand along his dry cock. He grunts in exasperation before tugging back on your haIr again, forcing your face into a contorted wince.

“I don’t wanna hurt you, you know that, right? Y’jus’ need a firm hand, baby, helpin’ you figure all this stuff out. So why don’t ya go on ahead and do as I say, sweetheart, hm? It’d make me real happy.” His words are silken, laced with his country accent and that hidden malice he carries within him, every step, every word showing it to you, drawing you in further.

You bow your head a little as he loosens his grip, letting you decide for yourself now. “I-I’m sorry, you’re right, I- uh, d-do need your help,” you whine obediently, feeling your scalp starting to throb a tiny bit.

Joel scratches at your head for a moment, watching you lean down closer to his cock. “Good girl, there ya go.” You can hear him smirking as you tentatively spit on his cock, watching the saliva settled on the top before dripping around the side. “Don’t be afraid, want ya to drool on it, baby, don’t worry ‘bout gettin’ messy.” He nudges your head forward and you breathe out a shaky breath before trying to desperately gather up any amount of saliva your drying mouth will offer you. You open your mouth, letting your tongue hang down before forcing yourself to spit watching more dribble onto the center of his cock.

“Fuck,” Joel grits through his teeth, feeling the sudden warm wetness of your saliva on him. “Thas’ it - f-fuck, now wrap your hand ‘round it,” he commands urgently, immediately negating any need for the words by wrapping his own hand more firmly around yours, sending your fingers curling around his length.

“Look at that, sugar, barely even fit that little hand around me,” he says with an arrogant grin, starting to move your hand in strokes, gathering up all the slickness you’d just provided. The sound starts to reverberate through the room, that same noise you’d heard outside his door earlier.

You’re starting to feel like merely a passenger as he jerks on himself quicker using your hand, sitting in front of him almost completely naked, the real version of what he was picturing this morning as he pleasured himself. Joel smiles even more at the fantasy coming to life right before his eyes, your little panties the only thing he has left to remove before he’s seen all of you. And by god, does he want to see all of you. See what he has no doubt looks just as perfect as it felt around his fingers while he buried them inside of you.

“Take ‘em off,” Joel says as the thought pops into his head, staring down between your legs, his eyes practically glimmering.

“D-do I have to…?” you stammer out, suddenly wishing you could put back on every piece of clothing that’s now scattered between here and the kitchen downstairs.

“Now c’mon darlin’,” Joel snips, frowning a little. His hand continues to jerk yours along a little more aggressively as his breathing picks up. “Jus’ want to see your pretty body, baby girl, thas’ all. It’ll help me feel extra good right here,” he says, squeezing your hand as it moves along his cock.

You reach down and start pulling on the waistband of your panties, a little awkwardly as Joel holds your other hand hostage. You shimmy them down and sit closer to the edge of the bed, where Joel suddenly wraps his arm around your back and pulls you to the edge, leaving your legs dangling off on either side of his knees.

Joel’s hand grips at the side of your face, cupping your cheek less than delicately as he pants out, your hand moving quicker and quicker along his cock. You feel a rush of heat in your body similar to when Joel had been touching you earlier. That arousal cropping up low and deep in your belly, that feeling you want to ignore when it comes to Joel. But looking at him - sheening with sweat, his enticingly soft yet muscular belly right in your face, his face turning a shade more red with effort as he puffs out his quick breaths has you nearly squirming where you sit. It’s intimate, it’s sexual, you realize, something he’s giving to you just as much as you are him.

“Fuck,” he spits out, tugging your hand off his cock and pushing you down with a swift shove to your chest. You fall back to the bed, nearly emotionally wounded when you notice his eyes still raking all over your body.

“Lemme jus’ look at ya, fuck, put your legs up, show me that pretty cunt,” he demands, his hand flying back to his cock to continue stroking it as you prop your legs up on the bed, giving him the view he’s asking for. He groans loudly, deep and guttural as his eyes are glued to your glistening sex, a new slickness dripping out from the way he’s looking at you. You’ve never felt sexy before, desired, and even though the circumstances are never what you’d envisioned, you’re completely enamored with the feeling of it. Already craving more of it.

“Can’t wait to sink my cock into that tight little pussy,” he murmurs to himself, but you feel your entire body tensing at his words, taken by surprise that it might be happening right now.

Joel’s mouth curls in that devious but handsome way to the side as he sees your change in demeanor. “Shh, shh, not yet, sweetheart. Wanna keep you pure jus’ a little bit longer f’me,” he breathes out with a wink in your direction.

Less controlled smacks of his fist against his skin fill the air of the room. You’re practically holding your breath, watching everything unfold as his cock throbs and twitches in his hold. He just watches your innocent, fascinated expressions move over your face and continues smirking down at you.

“One thing at a time for my princess. Take you piece by piece, won’t I?” He seems so pleased to be the decider here, to say what you get, and don’t get. How he controls how he uses your body. It makes his cock throb achingly in his hand, just the thought of it alone. His to use. His to show all the pleasure. His to keep.

He watches your lips, waiting for them to move, to answer his question. “Y-yes…” you whisper meekly. Joel groans at your compliance and his eyes flutter for a moment. He’s so close now. You understand that same feeling that had come over you for the first time not very long ago.

“Yeah, princess, daddy’s gonna come all over you now. Tell me, say it. Say you want daddy to come all over you.” He breathes heavily, little groaning whimpers as he goes harder, his cock angry and red from the way he’s tugging on it. “Say it,” Joel booms out, and you start at the intensity of his voice, curling in on yourself for a moment.

“I- I want daddy to come o-on me… a-all over me,” you say, hoping it’s loud enough for him to hear, that you won’t have to repeat it again. The name slides awkwardly off your tongue, wishing to understand it, make sense of why it made your core tingle for just a moment when you said the words.

“God, bet you do, yes, fuck, daddy’s gonna come now, paint that perfect body with it,” Joel punches out before his hips stutter forward, his hand giving a few jerks as he starts to come hard, the white stickiness splattering onto you - your stomach, your breasts, even where your legs lay open for him to look at as his own personal little show. He heaves as the final bits spill out and he leans his head back, sighing.

“God damn, so good, baby girl. You did amazing,” he coos, climbing onto the bed next to you. He sits while you lay motionless, nearly stunned from what you’d witnessed, the constant reminder of it in the form of his warm liquid dripping along your body.

“Let’s get you cleaned up,” he says more softly, picking up your discarded panties and carefully swiping his mess off of you with them, curling his body close to yours.

“That’s better,” he announces, holding the white cotton up to inspect the way his cum stains them now with a wry smirk. He sets them aside on his nightstand before his hands slip underneath your back and your legs to cradle you, pulling you into his lap. He sits back on the bed, nestling the both of you against the headboard as he settles you across his thighs. “This okay?” he asks, stroking your back.

“Mhm.” You nod quietly and thread an arm around his torso, intertwined under where his arm reaches up to meet you. The movement comes naturally, more than you’d care to admit, wanting to feel loved and cared for right now. You hate the tears that sting your eyes again, like you’re not strong enough to handle something like this, something that adults do.

“S-sorry,” you say, swiping your eyes quickly and trying to avoid any tears falling.

“Shh, don’t be sorry. Y’did such a good job, y’know that? Normal to get emotional if it’s your first time.”

You chew on your lip and then look up at Joel, his features already strangely comforting and familiar. The speckled, tan skin that you want to touch more of, his dark lashes that fall over his eyes when he looks down at you like this.

“B-but it wasn’t… my first time…”

“Sure it was. First time doin’ somethin’ like that. It’s a lot for a sweet girl like you. But you’ll feel good again, just like tonight, I promise ya that.”

You nod, slightly more encouraged by Joel’s words as you relax a little more into his embrace. “That… release… it’s an orgasm, right?” You nearly choke on the words, shame flooding you for even having to ask.

Joel blows out a teasing breath through his nostrils. “God damn, nobody out there teachin’ you anythin’, were they?” He ruffles the back of your head playfully. “Yes, darlin’ that was an orgasm, what both of us experienced.”

You crack a small smile at his teasing and brush your fingers along where they’re resting along his back. “People acted like it was… bad to teach about. My parents, people that looked after me, all of them.” You pause, feeling your face warm with the embarrassment of sharing so much “S-sorry I’m so clueless…”

“No, honey, not clueless. You’re learnin’, and I wanna be the one to teach you everythin’. It…” he inhales deeply, and you see that hunger in his eyes when you glance his way. “It excites me.”

“It does?”

“It’s so sexy, takin’ care of you and lettin’ you learn w’me. You like bein’ sexy, don’t you?” Joel teases, bringing a hand to your chin, tilting it just slightly. Your lips look the most inviting they have as they curve into the most delicate smile, one finally full of lust and confidence.

“I do…” you murmur in response, averting your eyes as you flush yet again. Your body feels warm, bare and pressed against Joel’s naked flesh, his words instantly having an effect on you.

“An’ you should,” Joel says, leaning forward to press his lips to your neck, smattering kisses down the length of it. “Already got me wrapped around your little finger.”

His lips tickle you as his facial hair brushes along you in his fast movements, and you nearly giggle, holding back at the last moment, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of hearing your laugh just yet. You sigh contentedly and lean back into him, fighting a sudden yawn.

“You all tired out?” Joel asks quietly, lips pressed close to your ear. You shiver at the vibrations of his rich timbre and inadvertently snuggle a little closer as goosebumps creep along your skin. Joel rubs your back in response, pulling you in tighter.

You nod, mumbling out a yes and Joel responds by gently rolling you over onto the bed, laying your head on the pillow. He’s curled up to you in an instant, arm thrown over your chest all the way to your arm on the other side, letting his fingers rub there.

“You get some rest, it’s been a big day, huh?”

“It has…” you mumble in reply, hesitantly resting your hand on his arm that covers your chest. It starts to feel like some semblance of normal, cuddling with Joel. You’d never experienced something like this, this closeness.

“G’night,” he mumbles into your skin, kissing it one more time before you notice him going more slack, starting to settle into that dazed, half sleepy state. You look over at him, blinking slowly with a deep tiredness, just watching his face in this calm, non-threatening state. He looks handsome like this, a little vulnerable and sweet, someone you could pretend is holding you right now just so you feel taken care of and cared for. You wish you could read him, trace the weathered lines on his face and find out just who he really is, which version of the many different Joel’s he’s shown you he truly is.

You fall asleep trying to figure it out.

Your eyes flutter open, finding the room still dark. You imagine it has only been a few hours since you fell asleep, but you woke with your stomach aching, hunger tearing through you. You realize the only thing you’ve eaten is the bread and cheese Joel fed you, and it makes your stomach growl again.

Joel has mostly rolled off of you, just an errant hand laid across your upper arm as he sleeps, body sprawled out on the bed. You lay as still as can be for a few moments, checking just how deep he’s sleeping before you slip out of bed, on the prowl for a midnight snack. You don’t think Joel would mind, would he? He’d fed you earlier, promised that part of what he’d do to help you here is to share his provisions with you, keep you full. You spot a knit blanket on the back of a wooden chair in the corner of the bedroom and throw it around your shoulders, shivering as you snuggle your naked body underneath it and relish in the warmth.

It’s dark in the kitchen, but you don’t dare flick on the light, happy to scavenge by way of the small glow from the open refrigerator. You end up tearing off some more of the bread, careful to not take too much from Joel’s provisions. Your eyes drift around the room as you chew happily, taking it in now that you’re here alone, gaze free to roam without any questions from Joel. You stop when you land on your backpack, slumped near the door, and your boots, tucked right where you’d left them when you’d arrived. How was that only yesterday? It feels like an entire lifetime has passed since then. Like you’re a different person than when you’d first entered the threshold of that door, shaking and terrified, barely hanging on. Now… you still weren’t sure where you landed, but you were certainly changed.

Your threadbare coat hangs where Joel must have decided to leave it when you’d taken your shower. All of your things calling out to you, screaming red, like a test that he’d left for you. To test your loyalty, to see your obedience. Everything you’d need to disappear from this cabin, all in one little space. Your heart starts to race, your mouth dry as the bread seems to go sour on your tongue.

You could leave right now, if you wanted. Take your chances. Let fate decide if you’d starve on your own or lead you to a new community - those people in Jackson - who might take care of you. You could learn. You were capable of survival, you knew you were. You could learn to hunt and fish and start fires on your own, to live off the land and not be scared of the hidden horrors of the world. Yes, you could leave right now, escape the uncertainty of Joel’s moods and promises, and learn.

You bite your lip anxiously, eyes in a trance as you stare at your backpack, with it holding the memories of those two weeks on your own where you fought and scraped by and nearly froze to death. You blink and turn your head back towards the fridge. Maybe you aren’t cut out for life on the road. Maybe you’re too soft for it. And maybe some more of that sheep’s cheese doesn’t sound so bad right now.

You open the fridge back up, peering inside to look for that little wrapped package you’d seen Joel pull from earlier. You nearly jump out of your skin when Joel’s voice cuts into the silent room - you’d been too absorbed in your own thoughts to even hear the creak of the old floorboards announcing his movements upstairs.

“The hell’re you doin?” his voice booms out in that controlled, stern tone that makes you want to listen. You whip your head around from where you’re crouched at the fridge, rummaging through it and see Joel stepping off the bottom of the staircase and into the main room. He hasn’t bothered to put anything on, like he was in a rush to see if you were down here, if you’d snuck off in the night. His naked body moves powerfully, muscles on display, and yet all you can focus on is what’s between his legs - his soft cock swinging almost tauntingly as he approaches you with such an angry aura.

“I - I was hungry… starving. I thought I’d -“ you start, teeth clicking together in a fearful grimace as he cuts you off.

“Yeah? Sure you’re not tryna run off again? Ransack my fridge and leave?” He’s already questioning you heatedly, reaching where you stand and slamming the fridge shut behind you and pressing you close to the door.

You scramble in your mind to find the words to make him understand, shrinking in, afraid of what he’s capable of doing to you. “Wh - no, no I was… look at me, I have nothing on, I wouldn’t be running out like this, right?” You gesture down to your body, only draped in the small knit blanket.

“Poor excuse, darlin’,” he sneers, looking down at you. The moonlight spilling in through the kitchen window casts menacing shadows across his rugged face. He narrows his eyes as he waits for you to further dig yourself out of this hole.

“I - I swear it, I haven’t eaten much, remember? J-just that bread and cheese, and I woke up hungry.” You plead and see him soften just enough to want to let up a little bit, but his face hardens again at the last second. You realize he’s scared, the hint of it behind his wild eyes showing for just a moment. He’d really run down here thinking he’d find you gone for good and that had scared him, an emotion you wouldn’t have expected from Joel. He has weaknesses and fears after all.

He steps a little closer and you can feel his cock, now half hard pressing between your legs. You fight the urge to wince, afraid he’s about to press it further.

“Hard to believe w’the way you were runnin’ off earlier. Not desperate to get away from me anymore now that I fucked that little pussy so good w’my fingers? Didn’t jus’ get what you want from me and wanna split?” You can tell he doesn’t even fully believe what he’s saying, he just wants to taunt you, remind you that he’s more powerful, that he holds all of the cards. He grips your cheeks, squishing them together and holding your head steady, inspecting you for another moment, as if he can get the truth out of you just by reading your face. His head leans forward and he holds you in place as he sucks on your neck, pulling your skin between his lips harder and harder. He lets go and keeps himself nuzzled tight to your neck as he speaks.

“Y’don’t do anythin’ like this again without wakin’ me up.” He squeezes your cheeks a little harder before releasing it, keeping his face buried against your neck. “‘S my job to take care of you, remember? Don’t wanna catch you like this again, yeah?”

“Y-yes,” you stutter, breathing a sigh of relief. One that’s short lived when Joel pulls another patch of skin into his mouth, using his teeth this time - you feel the slight nibble as he scrapes his teeth on your soft skin and you whimper quietly when it starts to hurt.

“J-joel…” you whine, shifting uncomfortably, the heat of his body so close making you squirm and break out in a sweat.

“No,” he cuts you off, wrapping a hand around your arm and another around your waist, holding you in place. “If you’re here,” he says, stopping to flick his tongue along his recent mark, “You’re gonna refer to me as a few special names goin’ forward, okay? Teach you a little respect towards me.”

“I- I respect you,” you blurt out desperately, your eyes wide and searching the room for anything that might help you get out of this. Joel’s hold is absolute, as you’ve learned several times now. You’re suddenly unsure once again, his frightening behavior reminding you just who you’re living with now. You don’t dare to call him a monster, even in your thoughts, because that would be admitting what you’ve been desperately avoiding. You’re attracted to a monster, inexplicably fixated by him, lured in with his sweet offerings and chance at a new life. Worst of all, you’ve already given yourself over to him, let him drag you further into his clutches.

“You’ve been s-so kind and helpful, you fed me, everything…” you add on in a soft lilt, hoping he takes mercy on you.

He stays silent for a moment, his lips hovering above your skin, only his hot breath fanning across it. “Then show it,” he says in a deep rumble. “You’re gonna call me daddy, sweetheart. ‘Cause I’m here to take care of you. And a good girl always listens to her daddy, doesn’t she?”

He sucks again. Harder this time, the burn and sting shooting out from where he abuses your delicate skin.

“She does…” you choke out.

“That’s right. I’m gonna be your everything, sweetheart. Your daddy, your sir, your master. And when you address me, you’ll address me as such, yeah? Show that you’re mine… show me respect.”

“M-mhm…” you whimper, swallowing with your lips pressed tightly together, the pain of him sucking on your neck after each little speech becoming more and more unbearable. It hurts, but something about the way he’s speaking, the concept of his domination over you, the way you can tell it comes from some completely twisted place of care, sends a warm skittering down your spine. Maybe you’re just as sick as he is if any part of you enjoys this, even the small, deeply hidden bit that seems to be growing with each encounter you have with Joel.

“And when I’m done w’you here tonight,” he murmurs, bringing up a hand to trace his fingers gently along your quickly bruising skin, “You won’t be able to see yourself in the mirror without knowin’ who you belong to. Show everyone who dares lay eyes on my girl that I’ve got you, that I’m the one keepin’ you safe and fed and fucked.”

“Yes… you are…” you whimper out complicitly into a soft cry when he bites your neck again, his hot mouth attaching like his life depends on it.

“So you’re gonna be a good girl, yeah? Behave and listen to daddy’s rules?” He speaks breathlessly, his cock fully hard as he feels the power coursing through his veins, the evidence of it pressing firmly against your thighs. He feels you nod against where he rests his lips, but it’s not enough.

“Say it, princess. Say ‘I’m a good girl, and I’ll behave and listen to daddy’s rules.’”

You gasp as his teeth sink into your flesh, as hard as they’ve gone yet, feeling nearly like they may have drawn blood. “I- I-“ you breathe out, clutching at his arm, digging your nails in. It only spurs him on, his lips dragging back just to suck the spot relentlessly. It brings tears to your eyes immediately, your mind only focused on the pain now.

“Say. It.” Joel’s voice cuts through and your eyes flash open after a few tears roll down your cheeks.

“I’m a good girl…” you whimper, voice cutting out into another cry as he assaults another spot on your neck.

“And?”

“I’m a good girl a-and I’ll behave and l-listen to daddy’s rules…” Your breath whooshes out as he stops, relief flooding your body when he places a light kiss on one of the sore, bruised spots. A few tears roll down your cheeks, spilling over from the plethora of them along your lower lids.

“Mmm, good girl,” he says more gently, pulling back to look over your face. He frowns, and it nearly startles you to see him have a look that isn’t that one of sick satisfaction that he’s worn so often.

“When you’re daddy’s girl, you’re gonna be so well taken care of, I promise ya. I know you’re scared, and it ain’t easy when I’m bein’ so firm w’you. Just want you to understand…” he pauses, dragging a finger along your cheek, swiping a tear and glancing down at it glistening on his finger. His body is still close, pressed right against yours.

“That I’m doin’ it for your own good. So you know I mean it all. I won’t hurt ya unless you disobey me, yeah? If you’re not a good girl, you’re gonna have some punishments. Do you understand?”

You nod hesitantly, your brows furrowed and trying to process all of the information he’s throwing at you.

“Y’need some sleep, look at you,” he says with a shake of his head, taking in your disheveled state, swaying where you stand as a few more tears roll down your cheeks. He feels a pang spearing his heart at your weary, dejected stance, body trembling openly at his proximity. He knows he did this to you, made you this broken little bird he could grasp in his hands and crush with his words alone, but he did it for your own good. He tells himself this sentence for what feels like the millionth time, absolving his guilt in a single second. You need him, deserve the unrelenting care he’ll pour out once you fully give yourself over to him. Anytime now… with your cracks showing more and more, your desperation to please him not as well hidden as you might think.

“You’ll feel better in the mornin’, hm?” Joel says when you don’t answer him.

You shrug slightly, keeping your shoulders rolled up, feeling defensive as Joel rests his fingers on your arm more gently now. “We’ll talk more then,” he says decidedly, making the decision for the both of you as he sidles up next to you and puts an arm around you, his hand resting on the small of your back.

You begin to walk nearly catatonically back towards the stairs with Joel’s guidance. His hands slide to your hips and squeeze as you move up the stairs in a daze, exhaustion overtaking you. You swear you’re tired down to your very cells, every piece of your being sapped and scraped thin right now.

“Thank you,” you murmur in a whisper when Joel helps you shrug the blanket off of your shoulders, laying it tidily back on the chair where you’d found it.

“You’re welcome,” he responds, kissing the top of your head. You’re moved to the bed, body soft and yielding for him to place you where he wishes, finding you a place wrapped right in his arms just as you were earlier.

“You’re okay, you’re okay,” he whispers, lips flitting against your hair and cheek when he senses your tension. “Jus’ be good, don’t do that again, okay? Don’t wanna have to chain you to the bed while we sleep, would we?”

Your mouth sags open, chest pulling tight at his threat, the way it had rolled off his tongue like it was nothing, no humor or jesting behind it. When he’d said the word punishment he’d meant it in the most serious sense. Things like chaining you up, biting your neck until it was bruised, bleeding, and throbbing, and the likely long list of things he had lined up that you couldn’t even envision if you tried.

“N-no, you’ll never need to do that, I w-won’t…” you reply after composing yourself for a brief moment.

“Never say never,” Joel whispers with a conceited smirk. “You may find yourself askin’ me to do it someday, princess. Beggin’ me…”

You let out a breathy scoff of a laugh, mostly out of discomfort, but Joel hardly notices, busy tucking you into the crook of his neck as he puts an arm behind your head.

“You’ll see someday, babygirl, you’ll see… now let’s get some sleep.”

You stare into the dark of the room, head rising and falling with the movements of Joel’s chest while he falls back asleep. You hate that he smells good right now, that the hair of his chest feels so gorgeous and manly under your fingertips. You hate that you feel comfortable right now, safe, despite everything he’s done to you. You hate everything about all of it, but you don’t hate… him. It makes you sick, your stomach turning as you fight the urge to cry yet again.

You start to think back to your backpack and boots, waiting for you by the door. Their enticing siren call is louder than ever, beckoning you away from here.

You could learn to survive out there. You know you could.

You peek up at Joel’s face again, willing yourself to read him, the same thoughts swirling through your head from earlier tonight. You slowly reach your hand up and touch the lines on his face with your fingertips - around his eyes, his forehead, his cheeks. Ever so gently you move along his face, and Joel’s mouth twitches as he sleeps, morphing into a soft smile.

There he is. That is Joel. That has to be him. That soft smile, a sweet man who wants to care about you. That wants a companion, someone to spend his life with, not someone to hurt.

You sigh and close your eyes, dropping your hand and shifting your body to mold even closer to his, finding comfort in his large, imposing form rather than fear right now.

Yes, you think as your eyes flutter and you drift off, you could learn. Maybe it would just be an entirely different set of lessons.

#every time i post this fic i wanna throw up a little i get so nervous #don't let her flop!!!!#fic: smother #joel miller #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #dark!joel miller #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #x reader

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wongyuseokie · 11 months

Text

There Was Only One Bed | k.s.y

Summary: You like Soonyoung, and Soonyoung likes you. You won’t tell him, and he won’t confess either, and your friends are tired of the back and forth and after concocting an elaborate plan that leaves you to share a room with the man you’re hopelessly in love in the hopes of a confession, or at least a night of torrid lovemaking. ☆ 18+ minors dni |☀︎fluff | ☁︎ angst | ♕smut | ♥︎ completed

Word Count: 7714 words

Pairing(s): Kwon Soonyoung x Female Reader Genre/Trope(s)/AU(s): Fluff, Smut. Some angst. Friends to lovers. Idiots to lovers, honestly. Featuring SeokBoo of BSS as a meddling and very nosy besties.

Content Warnings: Smut, fluff, mentions of sex toys, alcohol and YN and Soonyoung are just very clueless. Mentions of tigers, duh it’s a Hoshi fic. Miscommunication, Y/N over thinks and Soonyoung doesn’t think.

Smut Warnings: Teasing, dirty talk, mentions of masturbation, use of sex toys on female, squirting, cum licking. Overstimulation. Oral (f receiving). Unprotected sex (don’t do this irl). Dom! Soonyoung. Pet names (kitten), praise kink. Slight choking kink. Idk what happened; I lost my mind. Cumming in trousers, sunscreen smut, sort of? It gets smutty while he puts sunscreen on her—breast play. Mentions of dick biting. Author's Note 1: Thank you so much to @here4btsfics for beta'ing this ilysm! Also thank you so much to @seungkwansphd for reading this over for me too!! Author's Note 2: Happy Birthday, to our resident tiger (ik it's not time yet in SK, but I'm very sleepy, so this will be posted now. Hehe! HORANGHAE 💕 Cross Posted to AO3 © wongyuseokie 2023. All rights reserved.

“I like that idea,” you said, sipping your drink as you smiled at your best friend, Soonyoung.

“Of course you do. You like anything he says, just like you, ow!” Seungkwan yelped as you smacked his forearm.

“I liked his idea because it was good,” you retorted, and Seungkwan just pouted.

“Jeez, you both argue like primary school kids in love,” Soonyoung joked, making you and Seungkwan pretend to gag simultaneously.

“God no, besides, I’m not the one Y/N’s in love with,” Seungkwan responded with a wink, and you glared at him and sank further into your seat.

“Wait, Y/N, I’m your best friend, and you didn’t tell me you like someone? But you told him?” Soonyoung asked dramatically, and you shrugged.

“I didn’t tell him. I like your plan. We’ll rent an Airbnb for two weeks for the summer.”

“Alright, it’s all booked. I’m wiped. I’m heading home. Anyone wants a ride?” Soonyoung offered as he shut his laptop and looked around the room.

“Nah, Seokmin hyung fell asleep an hour ago,” Seungkwan added, “I’ll just let him crash here, but it’s late, so Y/N either you crash too, or Soonyoung Hyung can drop you home,” Seungkwan added with a wink.

“Do you mind?” You asked, turning to face Soonyoung, who shook his head.

He could tell you you wanted to talk to Seungkwan or scold him. There was an awkward tension between the two of you, and he wanted to give you an excuse to do so.

“Why are you being such a little shit?” You asked Seungkwan the second Soonyoung stepped out of the apartment.

“It’s painful to see you stare at him so lovingly and not do anything about it,” Seungkwan responded.

“I’ll tell him. I promise,” you said, your voice softer this time, making Seungkwan smile softly at you.

“Look, I’m telling you he feels the same way, and if you keep putting it off, you’ll end up repeating what happened two years ago,” Seungkwan recalled making you frown at the memory.

2 Years Ago

“Wish me luck, guys. I’m going to go tell him now,” you said to Seokmin and Seungkwan.

“But you’re tipsy. Don’t you want to tell him when you’re sober?” Seokmin suggested.

“Nah, Seok, if I wait. I’ll never tell him,” you admitted.

“Then, best of luck to you!” Seungkwan said eagerly, wrapping you into a big hug, patting your head, and sending you on your way.

You smiled at Seokmin and Seungkwan and went further into Soonyoung’s apartment. He was hosting a housewarming party, and you last recalled him going into his bedroom, and you thought it’d be the perfect time to tell him your feelings.

Soonyoung was flirty with you and cuddly, so you thought there was a chance he would also share the same feelings as you, and there was the time you both shared a very passionate–albeit drunken–kiss during your third year in university. Which was nearly two years ago. You were both working adults now, but you held onto the hope that he thought about the kiss as often as you did.

You took a deep breath as you stood outside Soonyoung’s room, and then fixed your shirt and hair and slowly turned the doorknob, and you were greeted with a sight that broke your heart.

Soonyoung and another girl, their limbs tangled in bed together, their lips locked as his hand was inside her jeans, and you could only guess that his fingers were inside her given how her hands clutched and tugged on the bedsheets.

“Soonie, so good, oh my god!” The girl shrieked, making you jump and accidentally knock on the side of the door, making both of them turn to face you.

“Sorry! Fuck. I was looking for you, Soonyoung. I’m heading home,” you sputtered, running out of the room and walking swiftly out of his house.

Soonyoung didn’t chase you that night, but he didn’t have to. He didn’t cheat, nor did he know of your feelings. He just broke your heart, but that wasn’t his fault.

You were having your morning tea the following day when you heard Seokmin and Seungkwan yelling outside your apartment. You let them in and recounted the story to them. You hadn’t realised you were crying until Seungkwan pulled you into a hug, and Seokmin wiped a stray tear off your face.

That day you made them swear they’d never tell Soonyoung about it, and it was okay. There was no malice in Soonyoung’s actions, just unfortunate timing, and while the two men protested. They finally agreed.

Sooonyoung also reached out to you later that day, apologising for what you saw, and you brushed it off and told him it was okay. It did comfort you to know she was just a hookup and nothing more, but you just learnt that maybe he didn’t think about the kiss the way you did, which was okay. You’d just have to be okay with being his best friend.

“You good?” Soonyoung asked that evening when you got into his car.

“Seungkwan seemed to be giving you a hard time?” Soonyoung probed, and you shrugged.

“Ah, you know how he can be.”

“Nosy,” you both said simultaneously, and then laughing.

“So, are you excited about a beach getaway? Because I sure as hell am!” Soonyoung asked excitedly as he drove.

“Yeah! Thank you so much for helping with the planning!”

“Of course, a beach villa and my three besties. What more could I want?” Soonyoung said excitedly, and you smiled at him.

“Besties.” Right, that’s all you’d ever be, and you’d have to accept it. You’d just figure out a way to get over him eventually.

“I’m so sorry, Seokmin. Repeat that last part because I think you said you somehow managed to get a villa with only two rooms?” You asked, glaring at Seokmin, who avoided your gaze like the plague.

“Y/N, it’s fine. We can share,” Soonyoung offered, and you almost wanted the ground to swallow you whole. Usually, you wouldn’t object, but rooming with your best friend during a beach holiday – where he’d be prancing around shirtless, not that he needed an excuse to take his shirt off – was a recipe for disaster for you.

“Plus, you two have shared rooms before,” Seungkwan singsonged, and you redirected your glare to him.

“Yeah, Y/N, we have. Unless the guy you like would object?” Soonyoung asked, and you gawked at him, unable to speak.

“No, I don't think he would. Now can you both get settled? I want to go to the beach!” Seokmin interjected, making you glare at him once again.

“I can sleep on the couch if it makes you uncomfortable,” Soonyoung offered once you were inside your bedroom. It was a vast room. It was probably the size of your entire apartment, with a huge bathroom.

“No, Soonie. I’m sorry for overreacting. I guess I thought we’d all have our space so we’d not bother each other with our unique sleeping habits,” you lied lamely.

“Oh please, we’ve been friends for how long? I know all your sleeping habits. You just turn into a little koala, and it’s adorable,” Soonyoung teased, making you roll your eyes at him.

“What about you? You end up holding me so tight that I can’t escape the next morning,” you whined, and Soonyoung shrugged.

“First I’ve heard you complain,” Soonyoung mumbled, making you smile.

“Anyways. Shall we get changed and head to the beach? I got 5 texts from Seokmin in all caps saying that he’ll drown me and feed me to a shark,” Soonyoung said with a smile.

“Please, Seokmin would have to see a shark in the ocean and would just end up screaming bloody murder,” you sassed, making Soonyoung laugh.

“Let me change real quick, and we can head out?” You offered, and Soonyoung nodded, lying on the bed while you changed.

“I’m sorry you’re wearing that?” Soonyoung exclaimed the minute you got out of the bathroom, and your arms immediately wrapped around your waist, feeling extremely exposed at his reaction.

“Fuck, no. I didn’t mean it badly,” Soonyoung said gently as he got off the bed and walked towards you.

“Then?” You asked.

“I meant, shit, you look hot,” Soonyoung admitted, and you removed your arms from your waist and smiled at him.

“I can say the same for you,” you said, ushering to his now shirtless form, and he shrugged.

“Shit. Maybe wear a cover-up? I don’t want creeps looking at you,” Soonyoung mumbled, and you rolled your eyes at him.

“Oh please, I’ll be with you, Seungkwan and Seokmin.”

“Exactly,” Soonyoung joked, making you laugh.

“I’m so telling Seungkwan you called him a creep,” you teased, making Soonyoung’s eyes widen in panic.

“No, don’t! He will actually drown me.”

“Damn, girl, you look fine!” Seokmin complimented once you and Soonyoung reached the beach, where he and Seungkwan were waiting. His compliment made you giggle, and Soonyoung glared at him.

“What?” Seokmin asked, and Soonyoung huffed.

“Oh, don’t be jealous. Can’t I compliment a beautiful girl?” Seokmin asked innocently, and Soonyoung huffed again.

“Jealous of what? She’s our friend, and her eyes are up there!” Soonyoung scolded, and you frowned at Soonyoung’s words.

You thought that Soonyoung – given how he reacted to you privately – meant that he was somewhat attracted to you, but that hope withered away when he scolded Seokmin and used the term friend. The word was sticking to you like glue.

“Whatever, y’all bicker. I’m going for a dip,” you mumbled, walking away from your friends and making your way into the crystal clear waters.

You had to admit, despite your feelings for Soonyoung, the water, the beach and the much-needed getaway were wonderful, and you’d forever be thankful to Soonyoung for planning it. You didn’t know how much time had passed, but you were simply wading in the water and enjoying the way the water kissed your skin.

“Boo!”

“Soonie! I swear I’ll drown you!”

“Aww, don’t be that way,” Soonyoung said as he wrapped his arms around your waist and placed his head on your shoulder, making you gulp slightly. His toned arms felt so good wrapped around your bare waist, and you turned around in his embrace to face him.

“What?” You asked, trying to act unaffected by his touch and proximity.

“You stormed off then. Are you okay?” Soonyoung asked.

“It felt nice to be complimented, and you shut it down. I don’t know. It made me feel like you disagreed, and then I got into my head and went for a swim,” you babbled, making Soonyoung smile at you.

“You look amazing. I didn’t shut it down because I disagreed, I just don’t like when someone else is so flirty with you,” Soonyoung mumbled.

“Why?” You asked.

“You can never trust someone’s intentions,” Soonyoung responded lamely.

“Oh, please, it was Seokmin,” you argued, and Soonyoung shrugged.

“You know one day I’ll date someone, right? To do that, I’ll have to be open to flirting and engaging in such behaviour,” you asked.

“Just don’t tell me the details when you do,” Soonyoung joked, and your face fell, and you moved his arms off you.

“You know, I walked in on you, knuckle deep in a girl, and I don’t give you shit or act like it’s gross, so why do you do it with me?” You asked, trying to stay as still as possible, which was a difficult task considering you argued with him while submerged in the sea.

“Why are you taking all this so personally? Are my jokes just not landing?” Soonyoung asked cluelessly, and you rolled your eyes at him.

“Forget it. You don’t get it. Look, I’m just going to head back to the room. I’ll see you guys for dinner. I��m turning into a prune after being in the water for so long,” you joked, placing a hand on Soonyoung’s arm and giving it a slight squeeze.

“Will you be okay to go back alone?” Soonyoung asked, and you nodded, gave him a side hug, and made your way out of the water and back to the villa.

You had only been resting on the balcony in your room for thirty minutes when a cough interrupted your daydreams.

“Soonie?” You asked, looking up at him, and what a sight it was. Tanned skin and defined, wet abs that seemed to trail endlessly.

“May I join?” Soonyoung asked, pointing to the couch you had sprawled on, and you nodded, slowly moving to get up. Soonyoung stopped you, opting to sit down, his back against the armrest, and helped you adjust so that you were laying between his thighs, your back pressed against his chest.

At this moment, you were in complete and utter bliss. You were also utterly fucked for not changing out of your bikini because the proximity and his touch would arouse you and make it obvious with your damp panties, and you knew your nipples would harden too.

“Aren’t you cold?” Soonyoung asked.

“Not anymore,” you mumbled.

“I’m sorry for what I said. Seungkwan hit me on the head with a plastic shovel, which I don't know where he got one from,” Soonyoung trailed off, making you giggle as you turned around in his embrace and sat up to sit between his legs.

“You are, respectfully, very fucking hot, but the idea of someone else saying it to you makes me annoyed, and it's not because it’s gross, but I don’t know. It feels like you’ll flirt back, and then someone will take you away from me, and I’ll be left friendless,” Soonyoung mumbled, making you smile fondly at his pouting form.

“Oh, you are a goober, but you’re my goober, even if I date someone. I can’t leave you behind,” you said, throwing your arms around his neck and hugging him, and his arms naturally wrapped around your bare waist, and he pulled you in closer and had to bite your lip to hold back the gasp you were tempted to let out when you felt his bare chest pressed against your barely clothed one.

Soonyoung didn’t seem to mind the tight embrace either, as he only tightened his grip, his hand running along your exposed back.

“Uh...are we interrupting?” A voice said, making you pull away from Soonyoung, and you glared at the intruder.

“No, Seokmin, you are not,” you said, gritting your teeth.

“Well, you two looked like you were one step away, ow!” Seokmin yelped when Seungkwan nudged him hard in the ribs, and you mentally reminded yourself to thank Seungkwan later.

“Did you have something to say?” Soonyoung asked, his hands never leaving your waist.

“Yeah, dinner at the local restaurant at 7?” Seungkwan asked. Soonyoung nodded at him, and Suengkwan took it as his cue to drag Seokmin away with him.

“Should we get ready?” Soonyoung asked once the other two left, and you nodded slowly.

“But I’m comfy,” you whined, making him smile.

“More cuddles once we’re back tonight, I promise, and this time, I’ll lock the door,” Soonyoung said, making you smile.

“Okay, okay! So Seok, I gotta ask, why did you have stitches on your dick last month?” Soonyoung asked, he was tipsy, and his filter was gone, not that he had much of one to begin with.

Dinner had gone well, it was calm, relaxed and filled with good conversation, but after dinner, you four decided to hit up a bar, and after three shots and two drinks, none of you were pulling any punches when it came to nosy questions.

“Dude! I told you that in confidence!” Seokmin whined, and Soonyoung shrugged.

“Wait, stitches on your dick?” You asked, unable to stop the laugh that followed the question.

“Listen, she didn’t know what she was doing and decided to give my amazing dick a chomp,” Seokmin blurted out, making you all giggle.

“I’m sorry, did you just call your dick amazing?” Seungkwan interjected.

“It is,” Seokmin protested.

“I don’t think you can be the one to say it,” Seungkwan pondered, making you and Soonyoung laugh.

“Well, it was nice enough for her to want to take a bite out of it!” Seokmin defended, making you all laugh again.

“Seok, no offence, that is not a good thing. Why did she chomp?” You asked, making Seokmin frown.

“You never use teeth, jeez, that's like oral 101,” you mumbled, the alcohol loosening your lips.

“I’m sorry?” Soonyoung asked, inching closer to you.

“What do you mean?” Soonyoung asked, and you giggled.

“Are you saying you’re sexually active? My sweet innocent child!” Seungkwan exclaimed dramatically.

“Dude, I’m older than you?” You countered.

“Can we change the topic? I do not fancy hearing about my friend’s sex lives, especially such pathetic dick-biting ones,” Seungkwan complained, making you all laugh, except Seokmin, who smacked Seungkwan’s arm.

“Gladly,” Soonyoung mumbled, shooting you a look you’d never seen before, but it made you clench for some reason.

“What?”

“What, what?”

“Soonyoung, you’ve been staring at me funny since the bar, the walk back to the villa, and even now in our room. You’re, like, glaring at me?” You explained, and Soonyoung stared at you as you plopped down on the bed, and he sat across from you.

“Something you said won’t leave my mind,” Soonyoung mumbled.

“What?”

“Oral 101.”

“Oh.”

“What about it?” You asked.

“You’ve given oral?” Soonyoung asked.

“I’ve had a boyfriend…why is this shocking to you?” You asked, confused at his reaction.

“It’s not shocking to me, but it's the idea of it. It’s uh,” Soonyoung fumbled.

“Let me guess, gross?” You assumed and tried to get off the bed, but Soonyoung reacted quicker than you, wrapping his hand around your wrist and pulling you onto his lap.

“I mean,” his voice an octave lower, making you gulp.

“I mean, kitten. It’s making my pants tighter, the image of you doing it,” Soonyoung said huskily, and you failed to suppress the slight whimper that left your lips.

“Kitten?” You squeaked.

“You like it. I can tell,” Soonyoung boasted, and you glared at him.

“Soonie, we’re friends. We shouldn’t,” you mumbled.

“Tell me you aren’t turned on right now, and I’ll stop,” Soonyoung said.

“Fuck you,” you grumbled.

“Oh, trust me. I want you to,” Soonyoung said cockily.

“But we’re friends, and friends don’t fuck,” you mumbled.

“We’re on holiday, and rules don’t apply on holiday,” Soonyoung mumbled, his hand squeezing your hip, making you roll your hips again and groan.

“Kitten,” Soonyoung warned.

“I guess, then, on holiday, friends do fuck?” You said, giggling, and that’s all it took for Soonyoung to press his lips to yours, and you kissed him back. His lips were even softer than you could have dreamt of. They felt full and plush as they moved against yours.

You knew this arrangement would end in heartache, but selfishly you’d rather have him in some capacity than never have him. You knew your guardian angel was working overtime but didn’t care, not when he felt so good against you.

“Do you have any idea how fucking good you looked tonight? Your body in this dress?” Soonyoung praised, his voice low, as he moved to wrap your legs around his waist. The action made you moan into the kiss, allowing him to slip his tongue inside your mouth, deepening the kiss.

You felt Soonyoung harden under his tight trousers and rubbed against his length.

“Fuck, Y/N,” he moaned, his hands grabbing your ass, squeezing and helping you rub against his length. You rubbed harder, noticing his breaths get more shallow as you rubbed against him.

“Fuck Y/N, I'm going to cum,” he warned and held your hips tightly against his. You felt him slowly soften underneath you. He pulled you in for a kiss.

“Fucking hell, I didn't think I would cum in my trousers at 26,” Soonyoung breathed, and you giggled at him.

“Fuck, this is not how I wanted it to go,” Soonyoung mumbled, turning slightly red, and you kissed his cheek.

“I found it very fucking hot,” you admitted.

“Wait, lay down. I need to taste you,” Soonyoung said, and you shook your head.

“Don’t rush it. We’ve still got a few days, savour it,” you teased.

“Oh, I fucking plan to.”

The following morning, you had woken up earlier than Soonyoung, and you were concerned that he’d regretted last night. Instead of confronting the issue, you decided to shower, change into a bikini, sit on the balcony, soak up the sun, and ignore your reality.

You weren’t sure when you dozed off, but Soonyoung’s voice awoke you.

“You know you should put on sunscreen if you’re going to bask in the sun like that,” Soonyoung suggested, making you look up at him smiling.

“Also, you look adorable when you doze off. I’ve been here for a solid twenty minutes, and you had no clue because you were too busy sleeping,” Soonyoung rambled as he handed you a glass of orange juice.

“You watched me sleep? Who are you, Edward Cullen?” You teased.

“I’m hotter,” Soonyoung joked, and you rolled your eyes at him before taking a sip of the juice, your eyes widening when you tasted the alcohol in it.

“It’s 10 am. Why is vodka in this?” you asked, and Soonyoung shrugged.

“It’s a holiday,” Soonyoung answered as sat down and joined you; his shirtless figure was so enticing that you wanted just to take him there, but you had to behave.

“Turn around. You’re not a Thanksgiving turkey. You don’t need to roast under the heat,” Soonyoung joked as you took another sip of your drink and placed it to the side.

“Huh?” You asked.

“I’ll put some sunscreen on you; otherwise, you’ll burn and then bitch at me,” Soonyoung joked. You scoffed at him but did as he said, you turned around, and Soonyoung moved to sit behind you and gently pulled you between his thighs, your lower back resting against his crotch. The thought made you moan internally, he wasn’t even hard, and you could feel him.

Your breath hitched when you felt Soonyoung start to massage your shoulders, and you moaned, melting into his touch, and Soonyoung, satisfied by your moans, continued his movements.

“If you keep moaning like that, the guys will think that I’m doing something else to you,” Soonyoung spoke as his mouth grazed the shell of your ear, making you press your thighs together to find some relief.

“Spread,” Soonyoung instructed as he moved his hands down to your thighs and rubbed the sunscreen into your thighs, his fingers grazing your pussy now and then, making your buck into his touch.

“Kitten, all I’m doing is putting sunscreen on you, and you’re moving and moaning like I’m fingering you,” Soonyoung spoke, making you clamp your thighs shut and turn around to face him.

Soonyoung’s smirk grew when he saw your flustered expression.

“What, pretty baby? Did my words turn you on?” Soonyoung asked as he wiped the remaining sunscreen onto his shorts and looked into your eyes as he spoke, and you let out a whimper making him chuckle.

“Come here, pretty baby, let me make you feel better,” Soonyoung said, pulling you taut against his body.

“Out here?” Your voice squeaked when Soonyoung’s hands found your breasts, palming the thin fabric, groaning as your nipples hardened under his touch.

“Yes, out here, kitten, what a lovely view,” Soonyoung said, smirking as he closed the gap between you by placing his lips on yours, making you moan into the kiss.

Soonyoung took the moment to slot his tongue in, deepening the kiss, making you groan as your hands tugged on his hair, making him moan into the kiss.

“You want more?” Soonyoung asked as he pulled away from the kiss, and you nodded.

“Do you trust me?” Soonyoung asked, and you nodded, making him smile. You gasped slightly when Soonyoung undid your bikini top, exposing your breasts and making him groan.

“Fuck, you’re beautiful,” Soonyoung complimented, pulling the top off you and tossing it to the side.

“Soonyoung,” you yelped as he moved his mouth to wrap his plush lips around your nipple, making you shake in his grip. No man was ever able to make you feel like this.

With just a touch, you were a dripping mess for him.

Soonyoung took his time, massaging your other tit as he sucked on the other.

“Soonyoung,” you groaned as you pulled him off your chest by gently tugging on his hair,

“What?” Soonyoung asked, licking his lips.

“I’m going to explode if you don’t touch me,” you moaned, making Soonyoung smirk at you.

“I know, I can tell, but I want that, build your arousal and tension up so high that when you do explode, it’s all over my hand,” Soonyoung spoke as he pushed your bikini bottoms to the side, exposing your dripping cunt and swollen clit.

“Wouldn’t you like that?” Soonyoung asked as he moved his finger to your dripping entrance, wetting it with your arousal and moving it back to your throbbing clit.

“Wouldn’t you like that pretty baby?” Soonyoung asked. He pushed two fingers into you while his thumb rubbed on your clit.

“I know I would,” Soonyoung continued to speak as he fingered you.

“I know I’d like to see you fall apart, and baby, you’re so fucking wet. What if you squirted for me? That’s what I want, to tease you and touch you until you fall apart for me,” Soonyoung spoke, his every word inching you closer and closer to your orgasm.

“You’re shaking. Are you already close?” Soonyoung teased, knowing damn well you were. You shook your head furiously, unable to speak.

“Hang on, this is in the way,” Soonyoung said, suddenly pulling his fingers out of you and making you whine, “patience,” Soonyoung spoke as he pulled you off his lap and laid you down on the couch and pulled your bikini bottoms off your body.

“Ssh,” Soonyoung said, running a finger along your clit, shutting you up instantly.

“It’s just you and I,” Soonyoung assured you as he sat by your waist. His hand moved downwards and found your aching cunt again.

“Let go for me,” Soonyoung said as he thrust his long fingers in and out of your pussy, making you moan in pleasure as you grabbed his other arm playing with your breast for some support.

“Do you hear how fucking wet you are?” Soonyoung asked, and you sobbed a ‘yes,’ making him smirk.

“C’mon, pretty baby, cum all over my fingers. Show me how much you want to cum,” Soonyoung spoke as he kept fingering you, his fingers prodding against your g-spot with every thrust.

It didn’t take long for something to snap in you and have you cumming all over his long digits. You mewled as Soonyoung moved his fingers slowly, making you hiss at the overstimulation.

“Fuck Soonie, I can’t,” you cried out, trying to move his arm away and fingers out of your cunt.

Soonyoung ignored your pleas in favour of fingering you harder, making you cum all over his hand again, and looked up to take in your fucked out expression as he palmed his growing erection.

“Good? pretty baby,” Soonyoung asked.

“So so fucking good,” you mewled as he pulled you into a soft kiss.

A few minutes passed, and Soonyoung spoke.

“So, no regrets, right?” Soonyoung asked, and you turned to face him.

“None,” you mumbled, inching your face closer to place a kiss on his lips.

A knock on your bedroom startled the two of you.

“I’m going to hide in the bathroom. You go get it?” You offered, and Soonyoung nodded, pulling you in for another kiss and finally letting you go.

“So, want to tell me why I heard moaning from our balcony this morning?” Seungkwan questioned you later that day while you four roamed the local markets, looking for souvenirs.

“Maybe you’re just horny and hearing things?” You quipped, and Seungkwan glared at you.

“So you told Hyung about your feelings?” Seungkwan asked, and you looked away.

“Y/N!” Seungkwan scolded.

“Can you keep it down? He’ll hear you,” you pleaded, and Seungkwan scoffed.

“He and Seokmin Hyung are several feet away from us and fighting over a pineapple. He’s not looking here,” Seungkwan clarified, and you groaned at him.

“Look, fine, we fooled around, and no, I didn’t confess; I’d rather have him like this than not at all,” you confessed, and Seungkwan wrapped his arms around your shoulders, pulling you into a hug.

“You know he’s been extra touchy and cuddly. You never know. Honestly, he might reciprocate,” Seungkwan offered, and you sighed.

“He also might not. He cuddles anything with a pulse,” you mumbled.

“He cuddles his tiger plushies, too,” Seungkwan muttered, and you cracked a smile and turned around to face him.

“Shh, don’t let Soonie know. He honestly thinks they have a pulse,” you said, conspiringly, making Seungkwan laugh.

“I know you know what you’re doing. Seokmin Hyung and I will be there with ice cream and tissues,” Seungkwan assured you, making you grin.

“You guys done whispering?” Soonyoung asked, eyeing you and Seungkwan as he and Seokmin approached you with a pineapple in his hands.

“Why?” You asked, pointing to the pineapple.

“Well, I wanted to show y’all that I can rip one with my bare hands,” Seokmin boasted, making you laugh at him.

“Come on, I came out here to see the sights,” Soonyoung whined, and Seokmin pouted.

“Fine, later, tonight you can show us your super strength and crack a pineapple in half,” Soonyoung relented, making Seokmin grin, and you rolled your eyes at the duo. You truly had some strange but irreplaceable friends.

“Aren't you going to get ready for dinner?” Soonyoung asked when he saw you lying on the bed. After sightseeing, the four of you agreed to return to the villa to rest before heading out for dinner.

“I was, but the bed is so comfy, and hey! Why are you shirtless?” You asked, leaning up on your elbows, and Soonyoung smirked, looking at you.

“Like the view?”

“Yes, and wait, why are you sweating?” You asked.

“Seok and I snuck in a quick workout. You must like the view, kitten. You’re undressing what’s left of me with your eyes,” Soonyoung teased as he climbed onto the bed and inched closer to you until he was effectively straddling you.

“Soonie,” you let out a soft whine making him chuckle.

“God, I love that sound,” Soonyoung complimented as he bent down to kiss your neck, making you melt under his touch.

“Fuck, Soonie,” you hated how quickly you fell apart for him, but he was so intoxicating, and you just gave in.

“Ah,” Soonyoung mused, pulling away.

“We have dinner, kitten. Get ready,” he said with a smirk, and you wanted to slap the smirk off his handsome face.

“Don’t scowl at me, kitten. Don't you know pleasure is best received when you’re patient?” Soonyoung said wisely, and you flipped him off, making him laugh.

“I’m going to shower, so imagine me and my naked body while you can go to Seungkwan and Seokmin’s room to do so,” you added before storming into the bathroom and locking the door behind you, smirking because you heard Soonyoung whining.

But you ignored it; two could play this game.

“Ow! Can you watch it? It hurts!” Seokmin whined, and Seungkwan glared at him after accidentally bumping into Seokmin during dinner.

“See, this is why you don’t rip a pineapple in half with your bare hands,” Seungkwan sassed.

“It looked easier online,” Seokmin protested, making you and Soonyoung giggle.

“So first dick stitches, now an injured hand, damn Seok, you’re starting a track record for dumb injuries,” Soonyoung teased, making Seokmin frown.

“Only because I have no dirt on you. That’s why you’re so smug,” Seokmin whined, and Soonyoung shrugged.

“Well, I just don’t like to kiss and tell, literally,” Soonyoung mumbled, his words slurring slightly.

“What do you mean?” Seungkwan asked, knowing his answer would intrigue you, but you wouldn’t dare ask.

“If it’s a hookup, I wouldn’t kiss the girl. Makes it too romantic for me,” Soonyoung mumbled, and you swore you felt your heart clench and start to crack.

“But? What if you did kiss her during a hook-up?” Seungkwan asked.

“Then I like her, more than just a hook-up,” Soonyoung responded, and your heart felt like it paused on the cracking.

You and Soonyoung shared several kisses, but none of them was during sex explicitly. Sure, you were engaging in sexual activity, but actual intercourse? None and that was only because you both hadn’t had sex…yet.

“So, define a hook-up?” You mumbled.

“Penetrative sex,” Soonyoung answered, his gaze burning into yours, and you hated how your thighs pressed together.

“Okay, more shots. I don't fancy hearing any further,” Seokmin interrupted, and you were grateful for the change of conversation because now the only thing that plagued your mind would be if you were to have sex with Soonyoung, would he kiss you?

“Can you stop fidgeting?” Soonyoung groaned as you kept moving around.

After dinner, you guys all returned to the villa. Well, you and Soonyoung walked back, and Seungkwan and Seokmin hobbled and drunkenly waddled back. Still, now, you were lying in bed and unable to sleep, the alcohol and the arousal of Soonyoung’s words during dinner and his nearly naked form pressed against you, keeping you awake.

“I’m trying to get comfy,” you whined, making Soonyoung groan,

“You’ve been moving around for like ten minutes. What’s the issue?” Soonyoung asked, pulling you into his chest, his arm around your waist.

“The shirt,” you mumbled.

“Huh?” Soonyoung asked.

“I can’t sleep with this shirt on,” you mumbled.

“Then take it off,” Soonyoung offered, and you turned around in his embrace to face him.

“What?”

“If you’re uncomfy, then just take it off and sleep,” Soonyoung repeated, and you gawked at him.

“I can’t. I have nothing else on underneath,” you muttered, and Soonyoung shrugged.

“I promise you. I can behave. Besides, it won’t be the first time we’ve fallen asleep naked,” Soonyoung added, making you giggle.

“No funny business?” You said.

“I promise, I’ll even turn around so I’m not looking at your very attractive form,” Soonyoung teased with a wink earning him a glare.

“Soonyoung!”

“I still have eyes, Y/N. You can’t blame me,” Soonyoung joked as he turned over, his sculpted back facing you.

You took a deep breath and peeled your shirt off, leaving you in your lacy panties, which were unsurprisingly damp. You laid back, pulled the blanket up to your neck, and hoped you’d get through the night without any more disturbances.

Although you knew Soonyoung liked to cuddle when he slept, you were both equally hopeful that he’d try and equally terrified he would because you weren’t sure how you’d react to either. All you knew was that he’d only have to lay a finger on you to know how badly you wanted him.

You had possibly managed to get an hour's worth of sleep when you felt Soonyoung’s arms wrap around your waist and pull you in once against his chest. His hand rested dangerously low on your tummy, and you kept fidgeting, waking him up.

“What are you doing?” Soonyoung asked sleepily.

“I can’t sleep,” you lied.

“Count sheep,” Soonyoung mumbled, making you roll your eyes at him and slap his forearm.

“Ow! Smacking me isn’t a solution,” Soonyoung pouted.

“I’m not tired, I can’t sleep, and you cuddling me isn’t helping,” you complained.

“I thought you liked it when I cuddled you?” Soonyoung asked, his arm wrapping tighter around your waist, pulling you in closer, making you gasp when your lower back pressed into his aching core.

“I asked you something,” Soonyoung said, his voice low, and his hand pressed into your tummy, making you squirm.

“I do, but” your words died on your lips when he placed his lips on your bare shoulder.

“But what?” Soonyoung teased.

“But we’re not usually naked,” you muttered.

“Technically, we’re not,” Soonyoung corrected, making a slight whimper leave your lips.

“If you want your statement to be true, I’ll have to adjust a few things,” Soonyoung drawled.

“Like what?” You asked.

“Like this,” Soonyoung said as he placed his hand over the lace crotch part of your panties, and you heard him suppress a growl when he felt how wet they were.

“Fuck, didn’t you know if you sleep in wet clothes, you’ll get sick?” Soonyoung asked, his voice low and teasing.

“Soonie,” you whimpered softly, and Soonyoung simply pulled away and turned to lay on his back.

“Hey!” You whined.

“Soonie is not enough. You must want it. You call me Soonie when you want my food,” Soonyoung teased as he laid back on his back and shot you a smirk, and you glared at him, but the adrenaline and the arousal were too much, and you had to fix it.

You peeled off your soaking panties and straddled his muscular thighs making his eyes widen, and just for a second, you worried that you had gone too far, but within seconds his hands found your waist, and he held you in place.

“Fuck me,” you said, making Soonyoung buck his hips into you, making you whimper.

“That wasn’t asking nicely or begging,” Soonyoung teased, and you glared at him again.

“Either you make me cum, or I use my toy,” you threatened.

“You brought a toy with you? On a trip with your friends? On a trip where I’m rooming with you?” Soonyoung questioned, and you shrugged.

“Have you used it since?” Soonyoung asked, his eyes glowing with lust, and you shrugged again.

“Maybe,” which earned you a smack on your ass.

“Fuck!”

“Don’t tease me. When did you use the toy?” Soonyoung asked, and you shot him a smirk.

“Tonight, the shower before dinner,” you answered, and something in Soonyoung snapped because you were on your back in a flash, and he was hovering over your body.

“You mean to tell me that when I said you looked good during dinner, it was a post-orgasm glow that made you look that good?” Soonyoung asked, and you gulped, nodding.

“Or when I heard a moan in the shower. I asked you if you were okay. You were really cumming?” Soonyoung probed, and you let out a whimper as you nodded.

“How many times did you cum?” Soonyoung asked.

“Two.”

“Well, I hope you have a lot more energy left in you because two is simply too little,” Soonyoung boasted.

“Soonyoung, fuck me, please,” you whimpered. You were sure you would explode if he didn’t touch you.

“Gladly, kitten,” Soonyoung said as he moved to shed off his boxers quickly and, in one swift movement.

Soonyoung was about to lay between your thighs when you tugged on his hair.

“I need you. Please just fuck me,” you begged, making Soonyoung growl as he readjusted himself and lined his cock up with your dripping core.

“Fuck, you’re soaking kitten, and you take me so well, ” Soonyoung praised once he was entirely inside you. You moved Soonyoung’s hand from your breast to your neck, making him raise a brow at you.

“You sure?” Soonyoung asked, and you nodded.

Soonyoung started to thrust into you – well pounding. Truthfully, he had been hard for so long that he needed to cum. He’d just make sure you’d cum first, he gently choked you with his hand, and your eyes rolled back in pleasure, making him groan and nearly cum.

“Ah, fuck. So fucking good, baby,” Soonyoung groaned when he felt you clench around him; he came soon after.

“Baby, so good.” You said softly when Soonyoung moved to lay between your legs and clean you up.

“I could just stay here,” Soonyoung mumbled as he flicked your clit with his tongue, making you buck up your hips into his mouth.

Soonyoung grinned before wrapping an arm over your waist, holding you in place. Soonyoung moved his lips to capture your clit while his tongue flicked your clit. His pace was perfect, the pressure, everything.

“Fucking hell,” you cried out as you felt your orgasm approach.

“Where is it?” Soonyoung asked and looked at him, confused, both from the question and the mind-blowing orgasm.

“The toy.”

“Drawer,” you motioned to the bedside drawer next to you, making Soonyoung grin as he climbed off the bed and grabbed the tiny device that made you see stars whenever you used it.

Soonyoung laid back between your thighs, ran the vibrator along your swollen and soaking folds a few times and then settled to press it against your clit, and turned on the device on the highest setting.

“Fucking hell, Soonyoung,” you cried out and tried to move, but Soonyoung moved quicker as he placed his arm on your waist, immobilising you as the vibrator kept assaulting your swollen clit.

“You’ll cum, when I tell you,” Soonyoung instructed, making you cry again.

“Please, Soonyoung, please,” you were begging so much, but you didn’t care. You had to cum. You’d die if you didn’t.

“You want to cum, kitten?” Soonyoung asked, and you cried out a broken ‘yes.’

“Then cum, kitten,” and so you did. You let go of all tension, biting your lower lip hard to suppress a scream as you came hard, your eyes rolling back in pleasure.

You panted and lazily opened your eyes, staring at Soonyoung.

“Fuck I made you squirt,” Soonyoung boasted, and you let out a shaky breath.

“Technically, the vibrator did,” you joked, and Soonyoung glared at you, dropping the vibrator on the bed, and instead pushed three long fingers inside your sensitive cunt, making you bite down on your lip.

You held onto his forearm as he fingered you harshly, making you squirt again, this time drenching his fingers. Soonyoung let you ride out your orgasm on his fingers and then slowly pulled out of you, bringing them to his lips and sucking them clean.

“Now I made you squirt,” Soonyoung gloated, and you simply whimpered, making him grin.

“You wore me out,” you whined, making him smile.

“Think you can sleep now?” Soonyoung asked, and you grinned, nodding, and he pulled you into his arms and slowly nodded off, and while you tried, you couldn't help but realise that you and Soonyoung had just had sex.

But he didn’t kiss you.

“Y/N,” Soonyoung asked when he approached you later the following day, it was your second last day here, and you had spent the majority of the day ignoring him, opting to cry in Seungkwan and Seokmin’s room, with each of them assuring you that Soonyoung didn’t mean his words during dinner last night.

You had tried to avoid Soonyoung for a fair amount of time but couldn’t avoid your roommate for that long.

“Y/N, did I do something wrong?” Soonyoung asked when you ignored him again, and he let out a huff and bent down and picked you up, throwing you over his shoulder and carrying you to the bed, where he dropped you and hovered over you.

“Why are you mad?” Soonyoung asked, his eyes wide and lips turned into a pout.

Damn his cuteness.

“You didn’t kiss me. That’s why I’m mad,” you admitted, and Soonyoung stared at you.

“I did, several times?” Soonyoung answered, confused.

“Oh..wait, do you mean last night?” Soonyoung asked, and you nodded.

“You said if you don't kiss someone during intercourse, you don't see them as more than a hookup, and I don’t want you just to see me that way,” you admitted.

“Y/N,” Soonyoung said softly, making you look at him.

“Forgive me for my crudeness. I didn’t kiss you last night because I was too busy losing my mind when I was inside you, and fuck, I just wanted you to cum so much, almost ruin you for any other man and frankly, if I kissed you, then. I would have just ended up blubbering my feelings for you, and last night I didn't want that. I wanted to feel you, every aching inch of you.”

“Oh,” you squeaked.

“I like you, and the next time, I’m going to kiss you breathlessly and make love instead of fucking you,” Soonyoung explained.

“No,” you mumbled.

“No?” Soonyoung repeated.

“Please keep fucking me. Just don’t forget to kiss me, too,” you said with a smile, making him laugh.

“I’ll never forget to kiss you, my love,” Soonyoung mumbled, bending down to kiss your forehead.

“My love? No kitten?” You asked.

“Kitten is for tonight or any time when I’m either tongue, fingers, or dick deep inside you,” Soonyoung clarified, making you gulp.

“Just shut up and kiss me,” you mumbled, and Soonyoung smiled as he leaned to capture your lips with his.

“So, are y’all together now?” A voice interrupted, making you and Soonyoung sit up and glare at Seokmin.

“Yes, we are, and we shall wear matching tiger print clothes,” Soonyoung boasted proudly.

“Uh,” you hesitated, and Soonyoung shook his head.

“Nope, you date me. You date the tiger within, too,” Soonyoung argued, making you smile.

“As long as you unleash that wild side in bed, too,” you whispered hotly, making Soonyoung’s eyes widen.

“Ew! Can you two not be THAT couple?” Seungkwan complained.

“Congrats, you two,” Seokmin said with a grin.

“Thank you, us three will be very happy,” Soonyoung responded, making you, Seokmin and Seungkwan gawk at him.

“Me, you and the tiger within.”

“Is it too late to take back the confession?” You teased, making Soonyoung gasp and tackle you in a hug and place a kiss on your cheek.

“Nope!”

“You know when it’s time to say I love you, I have a question,” Soonyoung mumbled to you later that evening when you were laying on his bare chest after a very intense and romantic love-making session full of kisses.

“No, Soonie, you cannot say horanghae instead.”

#seventeen #hoshi #seventeen fanfic #seventeen smut #svthub #kvanity #hoshi smut #soonyoung smut #indigo writes: hoshi

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