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a-writer-on-elm-street · 1 year

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Characters With An S/O Who Has OCD

mentioned: bo sinclair, lester sinclair, brahms heelshire, adam stanheight, lawrence gordon

warnings: implied contamination ocd, mentions of hand washing, mentions of injuries (cuts on hands), checking compulsions, counting compulsions, hurt/comfort

a/n: so this is probably one of the most personal things i'm gonna post on here since i actually do struggle with ocd but i hope you enjoy! also, lawrence and adam might not be 100% accurate because i'm only just starting out writing for them.

Bo Sinclair

Initially, you intended to keep the fact that you had OCD hidden from him, but you were eventually forced to tell him when he spotted the bloody cuts that covered your hands one day.

"The hell's wrong with your hands?" He asked, his face twisting in disgust as he pointed to the raw skin there.

"It's nothing." You said, shrugging him off.

But he wouldn't leave it alone. "Bullshit, ain't no way that's nothin'."

Eventually he wore you down and you tried to explain that it was from excessive hand-washing, to which he simply pulled a face, obviously confused.

There was no way he would sit down and listen to you explain in full though, so you opted to give him a brief explanation of your disorder before walking away, too scared to see his reaction.

Little did you know, he'd later show up to your room with what looked to be some sort of pharmacy bag.

"Look, I don't understand why the hell you'd do that to yourself, but it looks like it hurts." He said, awkwardly adjusting the hat on his head. "So I went out, got you some stuff."

He dumped the contents of the bag onto your bed, revealing an assortment of lotions and creams, and finally a roll of bandages, before stepping towards you slightly. "Didn't really know what you'd need, so I hope this is alright."

You couldn't help the smile forming on your lips as you looked up at him, his simple gesture making you feel less alone in your struggles. "Thank you."

He just shrugged it off before proceeding to silently take care of your injured hands.

Lester Sinclair

You told him pretty early in your relationship about your OCD and whilst he didn't fully understand it, he still supported you nonetheless.

He knew that you would often have bad days so he always made sure to ask how you were doing, sometimes offering to take you for a drive to help clear your head.

He could always tell when you were struggling because he'd notice how you would suddenly become reserved, quiet.

"You want some water?" He'd ask. "Or we could go into town for a little bit?"

He couldn't even begin to understand what you were going through but that didn't stop him from trying to help in any way that he could. And you definitely appreciated his kindness.

Brahms Heelshire

Honestly, when you first told Brahms you had OCD, he'd never even heard the term. But once you explained it to him, he immediately related to your need for control.

Obviously, not in the exact same way, but he understood how it could be distressing to go against certain routines, considering that was how he felt if he didn't stick to his own routines.

He didn't really understand what OCD was and he struggled to understand just how it affected you, but he understood that sometimes you would need space, time alone until you could get back on your feet.

He noticed how when you were having a bad day, you would be less physically affectionate with him, avoiding hugs and any close contact.

He wasn't a huge fan of the limited hugs or kisses and although his kiss goodnight had become an integral part of his nighttime routine, he tried to be okay with it not happening sometimes.

Brahms loved you and only wanted the best for you. He wanted to make sure you were okay and if giving you the space you needed was what helped, then he would definitely make himself scarce, probably retreating into the walls for a while until you were okay to spend time with him again.

And you would always assure him that he wasn't doing anything wrong and that you just weren't doing too good, and that you still loved him.

Adam Stanheight

For the first few months of your relationship, you decided to keep your disorder a secret from Adam, worried that he wouldn't understand and you would simply embarrass yourself.

But when you finally did tell him, well, he seemed pretty confused.

"So like what, you're a clean freak?"He asked, his brows still knitted together in confusion.

Your immediate thought was to get angry at him for saying such an insensitive thing, but Adam had seemed so kind during the months you'd been together so he surely didn't intend for it to be so insensitive.

You took a breath, proceeding to calmly explain to him that it was much more than just being a germophobe, which prompted him to begin asking a whole array of questions.

"Have you had this your whole life?" "If it hurts, why do you keep doing it?" "Have you talked to someone about it?" "Does that mean you don't like it when I hug you?"

And finally, "Are you okay?"

You couldn't control the smile on your face as you looked at him, the confusion still evident in his eyes even though he just spent the last ten minutes bombarding you with questions.

You told him that you were okay and that you had coping tools, but sometimes you would just have bad days.

He then joked that he was dating a superhero because it takes a strong person to live with something like that.

And then he ended with one final question. "Can I kiss you?"

Lawrence Gordon

There was never any hiding your disorder from Lawrence. He wasn't necessarily a psychiatrist, but he was still a doctor. The second he spotted all the repetitive behaviours he realised something was wrong.

He would often notice you checking the locks at night when he stayed over, or your countless trips to the bathroom, or the fact that it always took you exactly twenty seconds before you could walk away from the light switch.

He knew you were showing signs of OCD, he just didn't know if you knew.

One day whilst you were in the kitchen together, he brought it up. "I think you need to go and talk to someone."

You were slightly confused and a little taken aback at his sudden comment. "What?"

"I didn't want to say anything because I didn't want to intrude, but I've seen your behaviour and I'm worried about you."

You just gave him a nervous laugh, knowing exactly what he was trying to say now. "What do you mean?"

He took a short breath before speaking again, as though he were giving a patient bad news. "I think you might have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder."

"Oh, I know." You answered. Now he was the one who was confused.

"What?"

"I didn't wanna say anything because I knew you'd probably just go into doctor mode and start treating me like a patient. And I didn't want that."

You both left the conversation like that, and you assumed that things would probably be awkward between you two now.

But the next morning, you walked into your kitchen to find Lawrence stumbling about as he attempted to plate up what looked like pancakes.

"I'm sorry about yesterday, I really need to learn not to bring my work home with me." He explained, an apologetic smile on his face. "I thought I'd make you breakfast, if you're up for it."

You offered him a small smile as you sat down with him, a warmth filling you at the sight of the misshapen pancake on the plate.

"Thank you for making breakfast." You told him. "And thank you for trying to diagnose me yesterday. I really do appreciate that you were just trying to help."

"If you ever need anything, you can come to me okay? I promise I won't treat you like a patient. I don't see you like that."

"Thank you."

[Main Masterlist]

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thetwstwildcard · 2 years

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For the Greek words for love asks,Mania with the Yuus! 😳

Gonna include lore aka trauma for the Yuus ~

What/who does your character love a little too much? Why?

Yuuto Sakuraba

He loves sleep a little too much. The boy has only a few actual memories of his past, but in his dreams he gets the faintest glimpses of his other memories. He can hear voices of strangers who he knows he knows, but he has no memories of them. Little by little he is seeing more of his memories but the faces are still blurs to him.

Pyxis

He loves theater too much. Pyxis always was lost in the background as a child but one day got into theater. That was the first time the attention was on him. How he entered the world of twst was when the curtains fell on his first performance where he was the star of the show. As the crowd applauded, his world faded to black. When he arrived in twst he was still in his costume, aka a prince's outfit and was treated like such so he played the part.

Lacie Reyes

She loves her friends too much, ironic with what her fate is but Lacie would die for her friends. And well... She did die by her friend's hand, while accidentally. Natalie Williams aka her old best friend, Lacie can't say no to her friends but the one time she did was rejecting her confession who upon freaking out and thinking Lacie would tell her religious parents yanked her back too hard by the arm causing Lacie to suffer an almost lethal head injury before leaving her elsewhere to succumb to her fate.

Leveret Faust

He loves individuality too much to the point that he's isolated himself with no support system to fall back on. He was born missing his legs below the knees so he was raised using prosthetics, but kids are mean and bully those who stand out. So he got bullied, however that only made him more independent and "not care" about what people thought, but unfortunately that socially isolated him. He was able to get through so much alone that now he can't ask for help when he needs it.

Aspen Cyfrin

He loves himself too much. Well, that would stand if the boy had a heart, which he doesn't. He gave that up to make a deal to have even stronger magic. Because of that he only really cares for himself, because "that's all he has". He gave up his heart to follow a mysterious voice he once heard (aka twst Sofie) but now in the world of twst he may never find them.

Kagero Shimizu

He loves his role of a protector too much. He did anything for Asuka, and the boy was always close to him. Now that he's not by his side, Kagero is less than kind. He's constantly thinking about what if something happened to Asuka and if it did how he'd never forgive himself. He is nothing if he's not a protector (in his own mind)

Yua Misaki

She loves Yuuto too much, well he is the "manifestation" of what she loves too much which is the past. Yua wants everything to go back to how it was before she was dragged into twst. She was a child, only 14 when she was brought in and was stuck for 3 years. In those three years she felt her memories start to leave her, she couldn't remember her brothers' faces or her close friends names, she was even forgetting who she was. The one person that stuck out was Yuuto and she clung to those memories. She clings to what was and since she has nothing of her own anymore she clings to Yuuto, who to her despair has no solid memory of her.

Makaio Keahi

He loves freedom and adventure too much. He's a free bird, rides the waves and follows the tides. But he can't stay in safe waters, he always wants to go further. And that going further caused him and his brother to get into a boating accident (think Moana's dad and his friend) and the two were brought into the world of twst as the world faded black around them while under water. His want to know what more there is in life almost cost him his own.

#twst oc #twisted wonderland oc #oc #twstoc #twst ocs #twst #twst yuu #Yuu squad #yuuto sakuraba #Pyxis #lacie reyes #leveret faust #Aspen Cyfrin #Kagero Shimizu #yua misaki #Makaio Keahi #oc angst #tw death #tw drowning

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ccmpletemess · 1 year

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〔 jesse lee soffer, 38, cis man, he/him ) phineas prescott was seen listening to broken arrows by avicii. phin is a lawyer and known to be studious & pessimistic.

trigger warnings: homophobia, abuse, death, car accident

Phineas was born into a wealthy, traditional family. His parents were strict, wanting Phineas to be nothing less than the 'perfect' child they'd pictured in their minds.

He was a very studious child, keeping his head down, preferring books rather than the company of people. He wasn't particularly good at making friends, his younger sister Cordelia was always the more sociable one.

Phineas learned rather quickly that it was better to stay in line, even with the little things, as he would be punished. The excuse of clumsiness fell from his lips far often than not, the boy learning to patch up injuries far earlier than he should have. He would often take the brunt for Cordelia, claiming any mistakes she made as his own.

Cordelia's best friend was Ophelia, a family friend who Phin grew to see as another little sister. He'd do anything to protect either on them, and was always grateful for the comfort and support she provided Cordelia.

Phineas was seventeen when he realised he liked boys, having no interest in dating women. His parents had been openly homophobic, and so he pushed the thoughts to the back of his mind. If he ignored them, they'd go away. At least, that's what he told himself.

There was one boy, Phineas found, that despite how hard he tried, he could never forget. Lee Chang. His closest friend and confidant -- despite Phin not actually telling the other he liked men. His heart ached for the other, but he ignored it. Desperately pushing down the feelings as best as he could, which became easier when the other moved away. Or at least, so he thought. With every letter he wrote to Lee, the feelings crept to the surface and so, Phineas pulled away, not showing up when the two had planned to meet.

His parents seemed to have an idea that he wasn't straight, and pushed him towards dating females, and not wanting to oppose them - being too scared too, Phin went along with it.

He followed in their footsteps, going to law school. However, he pursued family law as a speciality, rather than corporate law. Much to his parent's disgust. It was the one thing he allowed himself.

After a drunken one night stand with a man, Phineas freaked. Terrified his parents would find out, he began dating Sammy. Although the two got on well, and Phineas did grow to love her, he wasn't in love with her, and while part of him knew he never would be, that he was incapable of actually developing romantic feelings for the other, he still tried.

Phineas never expected Sammy to fall pregnant, despite his parent's pushing him to start a family of his own. He was terrified, knew he should tell Sammy the truth, but instead, after an overwhelming pressure from his parents, he ended up proposing instead.

They married quickly, hiding the fact she'd got pregnant out of wedlock, something his parents frowned upon. They grew to be a family, the three of them, despite the fact Phineas was still under his parent's thumb.

It was Ophelia and Cordelia that had often told him he need to leave, that he deserved to be free, but Phineas didn't know how to walk away from his parents, didn't know how to be honest with himself.

It was a few weeks ago when his sister was in an accident that took her life. It was sudden, unexpected and threw Phineas into despair. His sister was gone, and he'd failed to protect her, despite the promise he'd made to her. He felt numb, lost and when his parents blamed his sister for her own tragic passing, he snapped.

This time, when Fi mentioned leaving, he didn't reject the idea. Instead, he went to Sammy, told her of his plans and the two of them packed their things alongside their five year old, and moved to Huntsville.

He's just arrived in the town, still grieving the loss of his sister, still denying who he really is.

#about; phineas prescott.#sero.intro #homophobia tw #abuse tw #car accident tw #death tw

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lit-in-thy-heart · 3 years

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and the next instalment of the merlin gif analysis saga is...

gwaine realising he's in love with merlin

because i want to make myself cry

Glossing over the fact that the first gif actually makes something in my chest clench, this seems to be the episode where Gwaine realises that he might be a lot little in love with Merlin.

Elyan definitely seems to believe that Gwaine is in love with someone in 5×06 (thanks @sneakyboymerlin for reminding me of that) and you could argue that Gwaine's lack of interaction with Merlin in 5×05 proves that it's not Merlin he's in love with, but think about it.

Gwaine rarely reveals his true feelings when he's around other people, but Merlin seems to be the exception. He's put himself out on the line before (yes I'm thinking about the 'Not Arthur' scene, I'm always thinking about that scene) because he can't seem to help but lay himself bare in front of Merlin. So if he's realised that he cares for Merlin a bit more than he should, he is going to be terrified of revealing that fact, and avoids Merlin because that's the only way he is going to be able to process his feelings.

Because Gwaine has it bad.

He loves Merlin subtly, powerfully. In the first gif, he casts a glance over his shoulder to make sure that Percival is still behind him and has still got hold of Merlin (honestly I don't know what they'd do without Percival, he's essentially the assigned transportation knight) and what's really interesting is what Gwaine is doing with his hand. It's not quite gripped on his sword, but hovering above it, with the fingers splayed. And perhaps I'm projecting but that is a movement I usually associate with trying to calm yourself down when panicked. As if he's telling himself to take a breath and everything will be fine. And the way Gwaine takes Merlin from Percival is so painfully gentle. He lets Merlin's body fall into his arms, rather than actively manipulating his form with his hands. Gwaine seems very reluctant to disturb Merlin in any way at all, choosing to kneel behind his head and slow down the process of setting Merlin down, despite the situation being quite dire. He handles Merlin like he's a glass ornament, as if he's afraid of him shattering at any moment.

Merlin is relatively well-supported by the makeshift bed they've got going on, yet Gwaine chooses to leave his hand resting on Merlin's shoulder. In fact, it doesn't look just like it's resting, but he's moulded his whole hand to fit around Merlin's shoulder. His hand doesn't need to be there. Gwaine doesn't even need to be there. He could easily be stood with the other knights, yet his instinct is to be as close to Merlin as he can. The only way he could be closer is by having Merlin in his lap, but that would probably make it more difficult for Gaius to examine him.

Gwaine has never really been one to shy away from physical contact. In the season 3 episodes he consistently provides Merlin with hugs (mostly when Arthur has rejected him but we'll get onto that whole thing in a bit) despite not knowing each other for that long. Even later on in this episode, he drops all the firewood to give Merlin a hug when he recovers. There seems to be an instinctive urge to be close to Merlin. And the fact that Merlin's head is resting on Gwaine's forearm is making me want to curl up in a ball and scream. And maybe Gwaine has never questioned this eagerness for physical contact before. But by the second gif, I think he knows what his initial refusal to be away from an unconscious Merlin means.

And a key part to this analysis is something I never thought I'd be looking at in depth, as glorious as it is: Gwaine's hair.

The first image directly follows the first gif, and the second image precedes the second gif. You can see that Gwaine's hair in the first image is much flatter than it is in the second. By the time Arthur and Co have left and Merlin is still unconscious, Gwaine seems to have been running his hands consistently through his hair. It's significantly messier and, whilst it could be argued that the wind plays a part, Gaius's hair remains largely unaltered. And one way to try and deal with stress or panic is to run your fingers through your hair again and again. It's not difficult to believe that Gwaine has been pacing up and down doing exactly that because Merlin is still not waking up.

If he was panicked before, then he's feeling tormented now. His hair, pushed out of his face in the first gif and image, is falling unchecked into his face and Gwaine, who usually keeps his hair in a relatively immaculate condition, is doing nothing about it. Because Merlin is lying right in front of him, potentially dying, and he has no clue how to deal with that.

In the second gif, Gwaine partially turns away and looks up, seeming to take a quick breath. He's deliberately not looking at either Merlin or Gaius, and this reaction comes after Gaius implies that Merlin could have internal injuries. And if there's internal damage and Gaius doesn't know how to deal with it, then Merlin doesn't stand a chance. And it's quite possible that Gwaine is looking up like that to try and blink away tears or just to ground himself. Merlin has been seriously injured before (think of the writers using him as a bit of a punching bag in season 4) but that damage was always external and Merlin was healed rather quickly. If it's internal, then nothing can be done by Gwaine. And it is when Gwaine is faced with the thought of being without Merlin that he realises just how much he needs him.

And when there's the slimmest chance that Gwaine might be able to help, he launches himself into it. When Gaius tells him to get firewood, he starts off in a manner that is almost a sprint, before seeming to realise that being in that much of a rush would expose his feelings, and he hesitates before electing for a fast walk instead. Because the only way he can keep himself from falling apart is to focus on helping Merlin and the possibility that he might be alright after all.

Look at his face here. He is stunned, then ecstatic, then confused. And the way that he moves towards Merlin makes it clear that he is not going to give him the trademark one-armed hug, but a full-on embrace. And Merlin brushes Gwaine off, because he doesn't have the time because Arthur is in danger and Gwaine probably should be paying more attention to what Merlin is saying but he's not. He's giving Gaius a tender smile as if to thank him for helping Merlin.

Gwaine hasn't made any mention of Arthur or the knights, even though it is a dangerous mission with or without knowing it's a trap, and his preoccupation with Merlin shows just how deeply he cares for him. The fact that his first instinct is once again to make physical contact with him, even though there was the prospect of internal damage and hugging Merlin might not have been the best thing to do, just says that Gwaine has got it tremendously bad for Merlin.

It took the thought of Merlin dying for Gwaine to realise that he was in love with him, and Gwaine spends the rest of the series struggling to deal with that.

He distances himself from Merlin for two episodes, not engaging in any conversations with just the two of them, until--

THE SUBTEXT.

Merlin's glance down in the first gif, demonstrating that he'd also do anything to protect his mother, is one thing, but Gwaine's reaction? The subtle sag of his body, the eyes darting down away from Merlin, the gentle swallow. In that moment, he's thinking how he would do anything to protect Merlin. Gwaine's gaze lingers on Merlin for a moment before he looks away, realising that Merlin has no idea how he feels about him. There's so much tenderness in that one look, especially after the slight annoyance that there seemed to be when Merlin kept talking about Arthur.

Gwaine was Merlin's friend before he was a knight. But Merlin only seems to see him as a knight these days, and Gwaine seems to decide that the only way he can indicate any of the love he has for Merlin is by being what Merlin wants him to be: a soldier to protect Arthur.

You have my word on it, Merlin.

You have my word that I will protect the one you care about the most. You have my word that I will keep him safe for you, so you don't have to feel the same pain I did. You have my word that I will put my life on the line for him, because he means more to you than I ever will.

Because this is when Gwaine realises that though he may love Merlin, Merlin will not love him back.

The way Gwaine falls back in his chair is incredibly interesting. There seems to be a bit of an impact with his shoulders, suggesting that he's hitting it with some force, but his limbs seem pretty tense. He's not slumping back in it from fatigue, he seems to be subtly throwing himself back in it. Because when Merlin was injured, Gwaine was thinking only about him and worrying about his welfare. But when Gwaine himself is injured (or has faced a threat of injury), Merlin spends the whole time talking about Arthur. And Gwaine can never measure up to Arthur. Gwaine only received hugs from Merlin when he'd been rejected by Arthur; a part of him believes that he's second best to Arthur in Merlin's eyes. And Gwaine is resigned to that, to never being able to measure up to Arthur, but is not happy about it. But he clings on to Merlin in whatever ways he can. By protecting Arthur. By greeting him when he's released from the cells and being one of the first faces he sees.

And just before their final interaction in the finale, Gwaine doesn't give Merlin a hug after Merlin has faced injury, but a touch on the arm. A touch that is incredibly similar to the one Arthur has given Merlin many times.

Because maybe, just maybe, if Gwaine can prove that he's similar to Arthur, then Merlin might look at him in the same way he looks at Arthur. Might prioritise Gwaine for once. Might even return a fraction of the love that Gwaine hasn't known what to do with for most of the season.

Gwaine would do anything for Merlin, but, by the final season, Merlin only sees him as a shield for Arthur.

#good morning everyone #maybe i am just projecting my behaviours and reactions onto gwaine but i think the point does stand #i feel like this does very much link to merlin's lack of self-worth and how he feels arthur is more important than him #gwaine could prove him wrong but gwaine doesn’t want to face rejection #so he drops subtle hints everywhere but never comes straight out with it #but in conclusion gwaine loves merlin and eira is a rebound and merlin is too preoccupied with keeping arthur alive to notice anything #so gwaine never reveals his feelings #and everyone ends up unhappy #so yay to that #merlin #gwaine #merwaine #merlin meta #merlin gif thoughts #bbc merlin #my gifs #merlin spoilers #bbc merlin spoilers #merlin season 5 spoilers

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beclynn-herondale · 3 years

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Similarities that I see between Jace and Céline

(these are just my thoughts. Press read more to see them.)

↑ this chaotic energy. You think he got it from Stephen? Nah.

Her anxiety reminds me of Jace's. And like their thought process was similar in ways.

They both struggled with belonging.

Céline corrected Robert when he said "Just like a warlock. Always for sale."

And Céline was like "Always on sale."

Again Jace energy.

Céline knew Amatis, Stephen's wife. At least, she knew enough. Amatis was sharp-tongued and stuck up. She was opinionated, argumentative, stubborn, and not even that pretty. There were also rumors that she still secretly associated with her werewolf brother. Céline didn't much care about that—she had nothing against Downworlders. But she had plenty against Amatis, who obviously didn't appreciate what she had. Stephen needed someone who would admire him, agree with him, support him. Someone like Céline. If only she could make him see that for himself.

Jace's smile was as bland as buttered toast. "Go on, go after him. Pat his head and tell him he's still your super special little guy. Isn't that what you want to do?"

But he couldn't look at Simon without wanting to kill someone.

“And even back then, in that stupid coffee shop. When I saw you sitting on the couch with Simon, even then that felt wrong to me—i should have been the one sitting with you. The one that made you laugh like that. I couldn't get rid of that feeling. That it should have been me.”

↑ Their bitterness, anger, jealousy, and envy towards the person who had the person they wanted and in general has the same energy in my opinion.

They both were angry and jealous of people who had it better or they considered to be good—Like, that was why Jace hated Simon so much at first, because Simon was everything Jace thought he'd never get to be, he just didn't realize it.—And Céline was angry of the kids in the academy who had loving parents and good childhoods, and weren't damaged like she was—they both were angry because somebody was someone or had something they thought they'd never get to be or have. (In Céline's case she never actually got it, not really.)

They both like to wander around when upset.

They both aren't too fond of the Silent Brothers. And I think that has to do with their head being full of certain things they don't want others to know, and the Silent Brothers speak in your mind, almost like they're reading your thoughts.

They're both observant, which could be from growing up in abusive and toxic environments but could also just be they're observant people.

They both can tell when someone is off. We see this when Céline sees through Valentine's mask. Jace often saw through the lies of people in TMI and still does.

And the both hate being pitied. Like it angers them when people pity them, we see that with Jace quite often in TMI, but we see it when Dominique says this: “Every Downworlder in Paris knows about poor Céline Montclaire, wandering the city like a murderous little Éponine. We all feel a little sorry for you.”

And then Céline thought this: Céline lived with a steady, secret simmer of rage, but now she felt it boiling over.

↑ Again, the above reminds me of Jace. He lived with anger that he kept under control but would boil over when triggered.

They're both sensitive. And get hurt easily.

“I wish I could be more like you,” she admitted.

In what sense?

“You know, just shut off my feelings? Feel nothing. For anybody.”

There was a long pause, and she wondered if she had offended him. Was that even possible? Finally, his cool, steady voice spoke.

This is a wish you should dispense with. Feeling is what makes us human. Even the most difficult feelings. Perhaps especially those. Love, loss, longing—this is what it means to truly be alive.

“I think—my father was sorry he had a parabatai,” he said. “Now I have to go live with a man my father was sorry about. I don't want to be weak, I don't want to be sorry. I want to be the best.”

If you pretend to feel nothing, the pretense may become true, said Jem. That would be a pity.

↑ They both wished to feel nothing, and had Jem tell them that wasn't as great as they thought. But they both still desperately wanted to not feel.

When she was a child, her parents had often refused her iratzes after training sessions, especially when her injuries were caused by her own mistakes. Let the pain remind you to do better next time, they told her. All these years later she was still making the same mistakes.

“No! it's better for your parents not to know it happened at all. It was just bad luck that one of them got me. I'm a good fighter,” Jonathan protested sharply.

“It's my fault I got hurt,” said Jonathan. “I know excuses are for incompetents. It won't happen again.”

↑ this bit on making mistakes, or when getting hurt.

Céline always carried a misericord blade.

↑ Reminds me of someone else who always carries blades.

They both were aware of the consequences of putting a rune on someone that they weren't 100% sure were Nephilim, and it was different circumstances but they did it anyway. Jace gave Clary her first rune and Céline gave Rosemary her first rune (I think).

More furious at her own instinct for mercy. After all, her parents had never shown any to her. Her parents had done their best to teach her that mercy was weakness, and cruelty was strength.

Jonathan said the word "weakness" with horror. Jem wondered what a man who had drilled a boy to fight like that might have considered weakness.

↑ Mercy, kindness, gentleness, etc. Was taught as weakness to them both growing up.

They both hate being predictable. Kinda like when Rosemary knew Céline would keep her secret. Céline hated that she knew that. Remember in CoA when everyone was guessing that Jace said no to Valentine, and he hated it.

They both never really felt like they were ever a kid. Because again, the environment they grew up in forced them to grow up faster than they should have. Which is why Jace didn't think of himself as one when he threw himself into battle.

like Jace I don't think Céline liked to upset the balance of things, meaning they don't pry and don't pressure. Which often gets them labeled as "not too bright" or "unobservant" they're both observant, they just don't say it out-loud. Jace is definitely like this, but I see Céline as this too. Stephen said she always needed to be told what to do, but I don't think it was that exactly, I think she just didn't like to upset things. Which growing up in an abusive and toxic environment does that. But I think it's also just part of who they are.

That sweet and obedient daughter of the provençal countryside. They knew how devoted she was to her parents. Such a dutiful daughter.

↑ Valentine often called Jace his obedient son. I see Jace in this part as well. Sebastian called him Valentine's "sweet boy."

She could close the door on the past, start again. She could choose a life without pain, without suffering or fear.

But who would she be without pain?

This also reminds me of Jace. Obviously he did end up choosing to walk away from Valentine. But there are times he doubted, because in reality he himself didn't know who he was without the pain he'd experienced, without his past with Valentine. And they both believed that the pain and suffering had made them stronger. Jace later knows that isn't true, but I see the similarity there.

They're both said to have vulnerability about them that made you wan to protect them. To keep them safe. Jocelyn said you couldn't really hate Céline, and I think it's kinda the same with Jace.

Both of them refused to ask for help. Thinking they could do it all on their own.

Céline could tell how much it hurt—and how determined the woman was to reveal no pain. She knelt by her side. Rosemary flinched away. “Let me see—I can help."

“Tell me what happened first.” She tried to yank her wrist back, but his grip was incredibly strong. “I can help you.” — this is in Clary's pov.

↑ Their willingness to help the pretty stranger they didn't know.

They both often felt they didn't have a choice in some things.

They both felt achingly alone at some point. And very much misunderstood.

The thought of losing the only family they ever had scared them, and they were willing to do anything to keep them. Even if in Céline's case hers wasn't that real.

They were both said to be beautiful, and breakable. Fragile almost. These were Jocelyn's words. That beautiful things were easily broken.

They both grew up denied of love and care.

Céline had low self esteem in a lot of areas. We often see Jace as the confident character who doesn't have insecurities or low self-esteem. but he does. Jace didn't like himself, his looks don't play a part here, he didn't like himself. He actually didn't feel good enough or worth much, that's why he made so many superiority jokes, because he truly didn't feel good enough but had to make everyone believe he did. Céline didn't feel good enough either, but she tried not to let it show.

Their childhood gave them bad coping mechanisms and suicidal tendencies. They both self harmed in ways, believing that pain made you stronger is one of them.

We often look over the fact that while some of Jace's mental struggles did come from the trauma of his childhood and growing up around war, that he was already at a high risk with a mother who experienced similar things. Because if you have a parent who has mental illness the offspring are at higher risk of developing one. And his childhood didn't help with that.

And we know what they both truly wanted was to be loved and safe. Really. Jace always thought he wanted to fight all the time, but by the end of tmi he realized he just truly wanted to be happy and left alone, he just wanted Clary and his family. Céline wanted that too, but she never got it.

You all realize they would understand each other, right? Like if Cassie ever did something where they somehow met, Céline would understand Jace and he would understand her.

Céline would have never raised Jace with anything but love and care. She would have made sure he never knew a childhood like hers. But he did. He ended up knowing what that was like. And it would have broken her even more to know that.

But she would probably stab Valentine in the face, which I'd like to see.

Friendly reminder that Jace looks like her around the eyes (no I won't shut up about this.)

There's probably more but until we learn more we won't know. Just remember he may be a Herondale but Céline is also there.

@khaleesiofalicante I tagged you 😎

#celine montclaire #celine herondale #jace herondale #jace lightwood herondale #tsc #the shadowhuter chronicles #tst #the secret treasons

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barsformars · 3 years

Text

Tricky

g - fluff, slighttttttt angst, suggestive

p - san x reader

w.c - 1.9k

t.w - san touching reader's naked body

c - san takes care of you when you get injured and are left all alone at home. the catch is? both of you obviously have feelings for each other but.....san

a.n - uusjsjjs this was requested through private message! im sorry it took so long lmao uh, this is just 1.9k of plotless words nothing will be solved by the end of the story so its almost like word vomit???

t.l - @closer-stars @jeongyunhoed @fairyofdusk

"It's not funny," you snarled at the pink haired boy who seemed to be overly amused at this situation in which both your arms were put in slings. You had slipped over a puddle of water, and that had sent you flying down the small flight of stairs right outside the taekwondo dojang, resulting in two dislocated shoulders. San pressed his lips firmly into a tight line to stop the corners of them from quirking up. On one hand, he does feel really bad, but if he said you didn't look ridiculously hilarious right now, he'd be lying. "I wonder who was on the verge of tears earlier on."

"That's because you were in so much pain I felt so bad for having asked you over for a sparring session!" San defended himself, a small pout forming as he did so. "At least the body and shin guards saved you from breaking your bones."

Once the elevator reached your floor, San pressed on the button to hold them open while keeping a close eye on you as you slowly exited. You've never noticed how much arm or shoulder action happens when you walk, until now.

It was only when you stepped through your front door and noticed your roommate's house slippers still sitting on the bottom of the shoe rack do you remember that they were out on a business trip. Being alone at home right now wasn't an option for you when you couldn't do anything by yourself, but your roommate wouldn't be back till next week. You didn't want to burden any of your other friends so late in the night, you had no choice but to rely on San.

But things...are always a little trickier with him.

"I can only stay for tonight," San sighed as he placed his phone down on the coffee table. You don't know if it was a sigh of relief or one of frustration; he had pleaded over the phone for ten minutes. "But my manager said that they can send someone over to help you out for the next few days."

"It's alright, I'll ask Jimin for help tomorrow. If they aren't available, I'll let you know, yea?" San nods, though rather reluctantly. He trusts that you'll be able to take care of yourself, except physically for now at least.

San holds you by the waist to support you as you got up from the couch, keeping an arm wrapped around it as he brought you to the bathroom. "Please tell me you have a bathtub."

"I insisted on having one, glad it's finally of actual use."

"Oh yeah."

As you soaked in the warm bath that San had ran for you, you couldn't help but think of everything that has been happening between the two of you. The lingering touches, the jokes with double meanings, the way he gazes at you so softly, and the sudden tension that fills up the atmosphere following all those. San hasn't put a title over what this relationship was, and you've been too afraid to take the lead even though you knew that friends don't act like that towards one another. You didn't want to pressure him, he already has a lot on his plate. But he ought to give you an answer soon if he's about to see you in your most vulnerable state, right?

There comes another knock on the door, the tenth one in the whole duration of your bath. "I was being serious when I said don't try to act tough and do everything alone." The knocking continued on non-stop until you replied.

"You're an impatient one, aren't you?" You joked. "I'm done, I need help getting out."

"Not impatient, just worried." You hear his back leave the door for a moment as he stood up from the floor. And as politely as he could be while intruding into your private space, San pushed open the toilet door gently and stepped in after informing you first. You couldn't stop the giggle from escaping your throat when you took sight of him, his eyes shut close in consideration that you might not want him seeing you naked.

"Oh, you're laughing? At me?" San asked in disbelief as he pulled his arms that were searching for the wall back and rested his hands on his hips, a playful smile growing on his face. "Why are you laughing?"

"Because you're cute," you cooed, much to his dismay.

"I'm not cute!" San argued, his eyes now open and glaring at you, still rather adorably. But before you could tease him any further, San practically stomped his way to the bathtub, leaning down to your eye level as his arms gripped onto the sides. "Don't mistake my manners for cuteness, I'm not." He said, almost with a growl, as he reached into the water and wrapped his strong arms around your torso, pulling you up so that you could stand. Taking pride in the way your eyes widened in surprise, San couldn't help but smirk before giving you a quick peck on your forehead. "You're cute."

Once he got you out of the bathtub, San tried his best to not look at your body as he dried you up with a towel while you stood there blankly, still at a complete loss for words. "You're so rude," you told San after finally able to process whatever just happened a minute ago. The boy merely raised his eyebrows, his lips pursed. "Taking advantage of my injuries to show off your strength when you know how I feel about it."

"Well, you're not stupid, you know how I feel about you. It's only normal I act cool a little," San replied nonchalantly but you could tell that he was too afraid to look you in the eye. "Come on, let's go get you dressed."

"Also, just thought that you should know...." San paused for a moment to make sure that you dried your feet properly on the mat before continuing. "I almost patted your bare ass earlier on." You can't even blame him. With how touchy he and his members are, you aren't even surprised that touching people's butt has become their second nature. But even then, he really didn't have to tell you.

"TMI dude."

San had been watching YouTube tutorials on how to put on shirts with a dislocated shoulder while waiting for you to wash up earlier on. You wouldn't have known either if he wasn't showing off all the knowledge that he had learnt less than half an hour ago by trying to convince you quite passionately, and with demonstrations, about why a dress shirt would be much easier to put on than a t-shirt, especially in your case.

"I will. I will wear dress shirts until my shoulders recover," you sighed heavily in defeat. "But just for tonight, can you help me with a t-shirt? I want to sleep comfortably even if it's just for tonight."

This time it was San's turn to sigh as he reached out to pinch your cheek. "I already told you that it will hurt."

"Make it not hurt then." You shook your head so that he would let go.

"Just sleep naked then," San mumbled under his breath but loud enough for you to hear, causing you to scowl at the boy. He catches your expression and sticks his tongue out at you. "Am I wrong?"

"T-shirt," you stated firmly, refusing to comply even when you knew San only had the best intentions for you in mind. You already don't think you could sleep with two injured shoulders, much less with your crush staying the night with you, and definitely even much lesser with an uncomfortable sleeping outfit. "Or I'll bite you." Those words becoming a reality became much more probable when his dimples makes an appearance once again, resembling the dent on a mochi when you press into it with a finger.

"I don't think that's a wise idea right now, maybe next time-" he gave you a gentle boop on the top of your nose with his finger-"now, your majesty, may I help you put on your gold thread shirt made from silk of the finest quality on so that both me and you can be spared from getting ourselves into a tricky situation?" If you could throw a punch at San right now, you would, but all you could do right now was to sit on the bed quietly and accept the teasing. And also whatever San was about to do to help you put on the shirt.

You wonder if it's too late to change your choice of clothing after San kneels down behind you on the bed, his chest and toned abdomen almost plastered onto your back as he reached over your shoulders to grab your forearms. "I need you to put your arms a little closer together, we'll have to try to get both through the sleeves together," he explained clearly and waited for your nod before he moved your arms as cautiously as he could, his eyes studying every twitch of your facial expression to check for discomfort or pain. "Tell me if it hurts okay? Don't act tough, I keep telling you that but please, please don't act tough."

All you could manage was a soft "mhm", your throat feeling too tight for proper words to come out of your mouth. You wonder if San, like how you could feel the warmth of his hands and body, could feel the heat radiating off your cheeks too. "I'm going to pull both sleeves up now, it may hurt a little," San warned, one hand coming up to pat your head affectionately before he gripped onto the sleeves again. Even with how gentle he was being, a wince still manages to escape from you, putting a pause on San's actions as he tilt his head to look at you. "I'm sorry, it will be over soon." You nodded, fully trusting him.

Though there were still a couple more times your shoulders hurt before the sleeves were fully through, the little apology he makes every time that happens comforts you, and also, makes your heart beats embarrassingly fast. Getting your head through the hole was a much easier feat and it didn't take long before your shirt was on.

San got off your bed to fetch his backpack and for a moment you thought that he was going to pull out the painkillers that you were prescribed with but instead, he took out two boxes of shoulder brace. "When did you even get that?" You asked, amused and touched at the same time. The shoulder slings the hospital had put you in was terribly uncomfortable and while the brace may not be way better, it was still better than the sling.

"When you were getting your x-ray done," San replied with a proud smile.

"Aw, I would give you a pat on your head if I could."

Upon hearing that, San practically shoved his pink hair into your face as he bent down. "You can kiss me on my head."

"I will bite you."

#kwritersworldnet #kdiarynet #8makes1teamnet #ateez scenarios #ateez reaction #ateez imagines #ateez oneshot #ateez drabbles #ateez blurbs #ateez #ateez fluff #ateez san #san #san fluff #requested #ateez writings #<- lmao that tag is here becaude i wrote ateex writing at first oops

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the-second-tonks · 3 years

Text

Why me? | P.P

It's a long Fic

Warnings : Loads of warning . Blood , illness , depression , cuts , self harm , minor and major character death . Heavy angst , take it to the heart and you'll feel it hehe. English is not my first language .

Summary : Y/N Y/L/N , a simple girl with a boring life . Peter Parker , a loveless life with a duty . When they both meet , they teach other a life lesson , love. A painful journey of two teenagers who run away from love only to fall for it at the wrong time .

Pairing : Peter Parker x fem!reader , Peter Parker x MJ x Ned Leeds (platonic) , Y/n x OC

"I guess that's it for today" Peter spoke it to himself , slightly hissing due to the bleeding cut on his right abs .

He moved a bit ahead , his left hand still holding the thin , strong rod on the cupola . He aimed his web shooter at the nearest building , ready to swing after the break . Leaping of the small support his legs had , a yelp left his throat as a sharp and stinging pain overtook him . His hands gave up and he fell down to the balcony of the house on who's roof he was laying peacefully . Stunned by the balcony decoration which consisted of beautiful plants and two chairs with a table , he kept looking around until he decided to face the people whom he might've woken up due to the fall . Looking straight , he froze . His eyes were glued to the figure . She was a pretty girl , baggy clothes . She was talking- no , yelling at someone on a phone call . Her eyebrows scrunched together , making her face look cuter than it was . Her H/C hair coming right in front of her face , only for her hand to push it back roughly . Even though the room that she was in was dull , he could see each and every feature of that girl's face under the moonlight . The white light from the celestial body only made her look more angelic to Peter's eyes . He stood agape . As much as he wanted to go , he couldn't . Y/n's sight made him forget about the pain , the stress of his homework and gave him a burst of happiness . He couldn't take his eyes of her. The only barrier between him and her was the glass sliding , which was closed . He kept staring at her dreamily until her E/C eyes met his . A short gasp left y/n's throat and her body was ready to take the defensive stance , but her mind took in the costume and made her relax , because she knew it was Spider-Man . She slowly walked over to the window and opened it , incase the friendly neighborhood Spiderman was in search of something , or someone . The phone was still in her hand , and her friend was still crying over how her boyfriend refused to eat her handmade fruitcake which caused her to break up with him . She and Peter couldn't literally hear her wailing and so , she spoke silently , barely touching the phone to her ear .

"Christy- yes you are actually being unreasonable, I'll call you later , okay.? Bye" she quickly hung up the phone and smiled at Peter , who stood front of her .

He smiled back and confidently entered her room as she sided . "Nice room , ma'am ." Peter complemented .

The room was pretty neat , not much furnished . It had a bed , a study table which had a book laying on it , open and a lamp .

Y/n smiled again, and spoke "Hello . Thank you Spider-Man . So.. do you need something ? Like shall I bring you food or some water maybe ? I also have a first aid kit if you need . And , there's a room right beside mine if you need your privacy-"

Before y/n could continue to go on , Peter spoke sweetly "Just an aid-kit please . And thank you for your care . Also , I'd really like to use the room . Thank you ma'am . I hope I'm not giving you trouble ".

Y/n simply dismissed his doubt by saying and smiling with the cute face "Not even a bit Spider-Man ."

Maybe he'd visit it back tomorrow .

Peter smiled at that . Yes , he smiled , after so many months , after he lost May , the girl made him smile . He walked across the room as y/n directed him to . He and y/n reached the cupboard , y/n scrambling through the drawers while Peter kept glancing at her , using the black patches on his eyes as an advantage . Soon (as if it was kept out for daily use), y/n found a plastic rectangular box . She handed it to Peter and closed her cupboard .

Peter quickly opened the box , only to drop a few medicines "Oh , I'm so sorry ma'am . I'll pick them up for you" Peter apologized , but y/n stopped him from bending .

"Spiderman , your cut . It'll hurt . I'll take it " y/n spoke , smiling at him .

His heart melt at the smile , but he composed himself and nodded . Glancing at the medicine , he tried reading the name but decided not to do it , because it wasn't correct to peep in . Y/n was quick in picking up the brown packet medicines . Peter smiled a bit , curious about what the medicines were for but walked out to the other room for privacy . The roon was similar to the girl's room , non - furnished , with a balcony . But he room was completely empty yet clean , the same case with the balcony . He removed his mask , breathing a sigh of relief , walking over to the balcony to relax before tending himself . He looked behind at the door which he had closed and thought about the girl for second , than he came in to the room and began treating his cut , often scrunching his face , biting his lip and leaving small grunts here and there . When he was done , he threw the bloodied cotton in one of the spare bags that were in the box . He found the dustbin in the passageway , as if she kept it there for him . Throwing the spare bag , he noticed the dustbin had a few spare bags in already , but he decided to ignore it . He quickly returned back to the room to return the box and thank the kind girl . He also wanted to ask her name , but she was already asleep . Peter smiled , adoring the girl who was clutching on her blanket . He walked over to the table silently and kept the box , only to notice the girl's math homework was incomplete . The book had no name , no school name or anything that could give him come information about her , but still , the book and the pen on it gave him her vibes . He smiled at the silly mistakes she had done , but loved her beautiful handwriting . He noticed the way she had doodled the book which indicated she didn't like math that much . Easily sacrificing the time that he had saved for his homework , he completed y/n's work in ten minutes and flew out of the house .

The whole day , Peter could think nothing else except the girl . He couldn't help but notice the improvements in himself . He'd forgotten how to love , smile , laugh and even live . He ran away from love because he thought everyone he loves , dies . His friends were happy for him too . He smiled at his luck when the homework he didn't do got an extension , he felt as if the universe was happy with him . He wondered a lot about her . If she studied in his school , if she was in a different school , if she lived alone or had someone , if she was of his age , if her name was Alice or the infinite number of possibilities Peter's brain gave him. Peter couldn't help but be excited for his patrolling today , after so many months . He wanted an injury to go back to her house , to see her , to hear her angelic voice and to bring a smile on her face . Peter truly knew that the girl was a blessing for him . A blessing that he wanted God to always give him , forever .

For Peter , the night was too slow to come . He leaped out of his house , his homework already done so that he could be relaxed while spending time with the girl . The whole time while patrolling , his mind wandered off to her thoughts . But to his disdain , as much as he tried to get himself hurt , he couldn't . He just couldn't . No one did that to him . He was mad at the fact that he was completely alright , but he wanted to visit the girl . He didn't want to appear creepy if the girl caught him sneaking and looking at her , so, he decided to act a fake wrist injury thing .

"Ahh !" Peter dramatically shouted as he purposely fell down on her balcony .

Y/n was quick to jolt her head from her homework . She coughed a bit , steadied her breathing and walk towards the window . She quickly opened the window and let the injured man in . Peter realised how good he was in acting .

"Oh-ah" Peter faked hissed as she made him sit on her bed .

"What happened ?" She spoke normally , not panicking.

"Wrist.. sprain" Peter took immense pain in speaking it , showing how much in pain he was . Y/n quickly positioned herself to look at his wrist and touch it . Now , while she was checking his hand out , Peter went into daydream mode . He kept staring at the girl in front of him lovingly , thanking his mask which successfully hid his loopy smile .

"Mm.. Spiderman , I also wanted to thank you for doing my homework . You're really so kind " she spoke- snapped Peter out of his daze when she said so .

Peter smiled , continuing to stare as the girl checked his wrist by rotating it with gentleness .

"It's alright" Peter spoke softly .

The moonlight was shinning , brighter than yesterday and the room was lit . She was doing her homework or something on the study table is what Peter noticed when he looked around .

"By the way , I'm y/n y/l/n " she spoke , smiling at Peter as she slowly moved aside and sat beside Peter .

"Beautiful name.." Peter whispered .

"Uh..hehe , thank you" she replied rather awkwardly .

They spent the night just like that , smiling and talking , occasionally just staring at each other .

At the end , while peter was lying on his bed , his mind kept thinking about the mysterious answers y/n had given . "My parents don't live with me . I'll be shocked if they care" .. "It's just me and me .. no one else . Just a simple girl ." .. "It's good to have someone to talk with , especially if it's you" .. "you know , you can enter when you want to , but please don't make surprise visits , it makes my heart jump ." .. "yeah , really . I fell into the puddle instead of my friend . I don't get it why it's always me , everytime and in everything" .. "i don't exactly study , but I don't exactly work too" .. he also took notice of how she would cough and take deep breaths regularly during their talk . All the thoughts and tiredness poured in ,lulling Peter into sleep .

Finally , it was time for Peter to leave . "Okay y/n , you're sleepy too . I should really go now" Peter spoke , a small side of him hoping she'll stop her like she had done thrice in the past hours .

"If you wish to ... Also , you can keep the Star Wars The Black Series Darth Vader Force FX Lightsaber , it's a gift from me to the person behind your mask, Spiderman" y/n smiled .

Peter just stood there , mouth agape . It was the costliest thing he'd ever wished for , and she was giving it to him as if she was sharing the homework .

"N-no y/n , ofcourse not . I-i mean , you-u yourself like Star wars , keep it for yourself!" Peter tried to reason .

Y/n coughed a bit and spoke in a rough voice "Keep it . It's okay , I don't need it . I'm going to give it to someone someday . And today is that day , you're that someone" she explained .

Slowly getting up while coughing again , she picked up the big box on the bed which she had removed from the cupboard .

"No y/n , really-" before Peter could complete his denial , y/n forcefully kept it in his hands and spoke "Keep it . Please" the desperation , plead and demand in her voice made Peter feel a shiver down his spine .

He was really curious about the girl now . He nodded a bit and took the gift hesitatingly .

But y/n , as soon as she heard Peter leaving , she cried . Hard and harder . She knew she shouldn't , it could cause her problems but she didn't care . Soon , her lungs felt the shortness for breath , quickly getting up before the problem would worsen , she used the pump to help herself . Knowing that she could talk to the only friend and doctor who treated her condition , she called her and began talking for an appointment.

Days went by and nights came . So did Peter , to y/N's house . He regularly visited her , everyday , same time . They grew close all the way and Peter's feelings were at their peak . He knew it was tough to handle them , but he had too . Today night too , as usual Peter entered y/n's room , the window was open , as it is daily . He looked around and saw her sitting on her bed , the book about physics that Peter had lent her from the library was in her hand . She smiled at Peter , but the smile had something else in it . A feeling , a truth , but Peter couldn't recognise it . He smiled back , but it wasn't good . He didn't feel cheerful . He felt .. a strong feeling . The air felt thick , despite its lightness . It felt as if the relationship and comfort between the two of them had taken another step . The final step . Love .

"Y/n " Peter want it to go out cheerful , but it came out to be quite like a calm whisper .

They both felt the tension but y/n decided to stay strong

Just one night more . Okay , maybe two or three , or even months ..but I have to stay strong was what y/ n kept chanting in her head.

They spent that night in the balcony , y/N's head resting on Peter's shoulder "Spidey- stop laughing-" y/n spoke this , breaking in a fit of giggles herself .

"But it is funny ! Oh god , how in the world did you prank her like this" Peter appreciated y/n's pranking skills .

"Spidey , do you know why some things happen with some people only?" Y/n asked after a few minutes of silence.

Peter squinted his eyes at the question which was filled with an emotion he couldn't quite point at . "Why do you ask?" Peter replied.

"Just like that" she answered back .

Peter looked down at her , and his love for her just went out of control . She looked like a goddess on earth , sent for him . He knew that at this moment , he was really seeing the girl like y/n as the ideal woman he would like to start a family with . Y/n looked up into his eyes and then , the tension between them took a high rise . It was took much to ignore . Y/N's heart was hammering in her chest .

She knew it wasn't good , the hammering would damage her condition , but she wanted to kiss spiderman , to tell him that you loved the person behind the mask , y/n forgot everything and let it flow , a doubt still lingering in her mind though . Surprising himself , Peter let his eyes wander down to her rosy lips and back to her eyes , asking her if he was allowed to . In the flow of events , y/n betrayed her determination of not letting emotions flow out and leaned in . Peter leaned in too , feeling y/N's hand lifting his mask up to his lips . They were close , so close but before the magic could happen , y/n felt a big pain in her chest , she took a sharp breath in . Immediately , her mind reminded her about why she wanted to avoid doing this and she pulled back , awkwardly getting up .

"You should leave , Spiderman . Take care" she went inside and closed the sliding transparent door right on his face .

She put on the curtains and disappeared from Peter's view , who couldn't contemplate a thing . Feeling sad , he decided to leave .

Peter kept wondering about her the whole day , as usual , but he was sad . He particularly concentrated on yesterday's part and how she refused to kiss him , not directly , but she did get up and leave . Peter was helped by MJ , who told him to reveal his identity and then kiss her .

"She might've stopped because you're a superhero and she's just a simple girl . She must've stopped so as to not break her heart , she needs a face reveal Peter " MJ spoke , now continuing with her homework . Peter nodded , getting ready for the biggest night in his life .

It was the next day after Spiderman tried kissing her . Y/n was outside of Christy's clinic , entering in as she felt the disease going worse minute by minute . Clutching the paper tightly to be stable , she glanced at the application that was given to her a year ago , when she was diagnosed with RCM (Restrictive Cardiomyopathy) . A condition in which the chambers of the heart become stiff over time. Though the heart is able to squeeze well, it's not able to relax between beats normally. This makes it harder for the heart to fill with blood , eventually resulting in heart failure . She didn't know when she would die , she didn't know . She was also being cured , but she knew she wouldn't make it . One of the rarest heart disease had no cure . Though Christy kept telling her that she was making slow progresses , she could read the guilt of lying in her eyes . Slowly pushing open the door of the quiet clinic , she simply made her way to the cabin . Entering the AC room , she smiled at Christy , who smiled back and asked her to sit .

"Did you patch up with your boyfriend?" Y/n joked .

Christy laughed and replied "Yep dear . I'm so sorry. You had called me up for an appointment and there I was , beginning to rant .. So , how have you been ?" Christy asked , giving her full attention to y/n .

"I feel like it's going worse . Shortness of breath has been very frequent lately-"

Before y/n could continue , Christy raised her eyebrows and spoke "Did you cry hard or do some hard-core exercise?" .

Y/n nodded a bit and spoke "the former."

Christy smiled sympathetically and spoke "it's alright ! You're really doing well , you might even mak-"

Y/n clicked her tongue and informed her "it's not that Christy .... My whole life , I kept running away from love , I kept ignoring my friends who loved me , never dated anyone only to realise that I had much time and I wasted it in hopelessness. And now , when I'm in love , I don't have time .. I fell for someone but I..I know I won't be there for him when he'll need me. He told me about his uncle , aunt and parents and how he feared to loose his loved ones , if he'll loose me too , it's gonna make him believe that all his loved ones die , which isn't true .. I don't know what to do , as much as I wanna experience the love I have for him in my limited life , I can't , i- .."

Y/n's eyes filled with tears at the unfairness of life , and she let out a small broken laugh "why me?" .

Christy controlled herself and spoke "you're really gonna make it-" .

"Don't lie to me" y/n clearly asked Christy to tell her the painful truth .

"Alright , let's get your check up done and then I'll tell you the truth... Okay?" Christy spoke half-heartedly .

After the checkup , y/n sat , waiting for the reports .

Christy came back with a nervous smile and y/n instantly understood that it wasn't good . "Y/n .. uh.. you're..um..uh..your heart is .. not doing good .." y/n smiled , the smile was do sad , that it bought tears in Christy's eyes .

"You might have a .. few hours only , Y/n . I can only say that everything depends on your will power , it can make you last till tomorrow.." y/n let tears fall .

The first thing in her mind was making it till the time Spiderman came . She wanted to tell him about her feelings . Tell him about her heart . Tell him that she didn't even know that her weak heart was capable of loving someone so much . Kiss him .

"Do you want to admit yourself , you might last a few more days like that" Christy gained her professional self .

"No .. if I stay here , he won't know .. I want to talk with him one last time.." y/n spoke and got up .

"I'd definitely ask God after I'm done with this world , that why was it me , why did this happen with me.. why I couldn't live like the endless teenagers .. .." y/n chuckled hopelessly before running out of the office .

She wailed and cried and did everything from scratching and punching the walls to throwing the things from the cupboard on the ground to shake off the pain of facing the unfairness of life and God . She didn't care about her heart which would've been suffering badly due to high need of blood circulation . She cried all the day and finally , it was time for Spider-Man to come. She was surprised that she did make it , because the pain in heart was insane , she couldn't distinguish between the pain of the illness and the pain of the love. She was literally shivering now , all the lights of her room switched off as she waited for him . She knew her heart was on the verge of giving up , when a new doubt sprung in her thoughts .

"Will he come ? I refused to kiss him and dismissed him without any goodbye.. oh god no .. please come Spiderman , please" her heart beat accelerated , causing her to yelp in pain .

She pumped her breaths again , as shortness of breath was a very regular thing to face . She was too tired to even move and continued to sit in the seat . She remembered how the shock of being shot in the chest got her this disease in her childhood . "scarring of the heart from an unknown cause is a cause for this disease , y/n" . Her family was in the dangerous stuff from the beginning and she had to suffer a great loss of loosing her parents . They never cared for her , but they did leave a lot of money for y/n . She coughed for the infinite time that evening , her throat hoarse as she kept going for Spider-Man ...

Peter was confused . It had been 14 mins pass the time he was supposed to go . He had been practicing on how to approach her today .

"Y/n I love you a lot . I have been in love with you for sometime now.. No , this sounds too simple" Peter muttered under his breath .

His hand had a bouquet of red flowers while he bit his lip in frustration . Checking himself out in a nearby broken glass , he left it to god on how to approach her , he couldn't wait anymore...

Dear Spiderman ,

Peter was confused as hell when he noticed the lights off . His heart banged in his chest at the thought of her not wanting to meet him , but he noticed the open window . Slowly opening it , he walked around the room to switch on the light . His scrunched his nose at a faint smell of blood . On switching the lights on , he looked around with a faint smile , only for the smile to drop vigorously . The walls were scratched , there was blood on the walls and some holes too . The bouquet dropped from his hands and he looked around to take in the mess. There was a pump lying on the ground and the things of cupboard were all out and on the ground . He picked up the dress that he'd gifted y/n and immediately dropped it .

"Y/n !!!" His voiced echoed throughout the empty house as he removed his mask , and he stepped out of the room to find the girl in the house .

He realised that he had never stepped out of the first floor but concentrated on finding y/n .

"Y/-" before he could continue , a sob left his lips .

Y/n was right there , lying on the stairs . Peter slowly approached her and called her name out , but she didn't respond .

"Y/n?" Peter's voice broke as he saw her unmoving body. He picked her up and layed her in her room , a letter in her hand . He took the letter of her cold and stone hand and read it , his eyes already glistening with tears ..

I'm really sorry . I never told you that I had an illness with no cure . My life was very simple and boring until you came . You sprung love in my life and as much as I wanted to be away from the feeling , I loved it . I loved love. I loved you , but I knew that we'd end . We'd never be the 'forever'. We'd never be a happily married couple. But Spiderman , i don't want you to think that the ones you love always die . No .. it's not that . It's this , that you love the ones who are dying . And you give them the love and the care , so that they can die peacefully .

It's strange isn't it , I don't even know your name or your face . But I love you . I don't know if you do. I'll be waiting for you , up there . I need to have a short talk with God . But I think you do , so please , I want you to move on . I m writing this letter in my last minutes Spiderman , I don't know how many minutes or even seconds more and I don't even know how I managed to write it , but if you ever find this , be strong , my love . Because not everyone stays , I was sent down on the earth to teach you something and go . I wish I could stay , I wish I could take a place of someone who's living still , but I can't . I'm really sorry . And thank you for coming into my life and staying with me till my last breath- wait , Is it you or someone just pranking? .

Y/n got up with the letter in her hand , her feet swollen and trembling . She heard a knock . Maybe it was Spider-Man , maybe he wanted to come in his normal form , reveal him . She hurried down in happiness , her heart gasping for breath with her . Love gave her immense power and strength and there she went down the stairs , tripping twice . As soon as she reached the door , no one was there . The world came crashing down. She did a big mistake . She forgot her pump upstairs and now there was no one . The letter clutched in her hand , she cried , silently whispering "why me ?" Her body fell down as her heart broke and gave up .

°°

Peter's body shook at the loss . He couldn't even tell her he loved her .

Only if he kissed her yesterday , only if he arrived at the regular time today , only if he hadn't run away from love , "Why us , y/n" ...

Do like or reblog if you liked it :)

Thank you for reading !

I don't expect it to be liked a lot or reach the number of notes I expect lol , but I like the way it turned out ..

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danceworshipper · 3 years

Text

Oliver Adams - HPHM Profile [redone]

(information is as of sixth year - shared universe with @ask-hphm-crew)

Identity

Name: Oliver Tyler Adams

Gender: Male (cis)

Age: 16

Birthday: May 28th, 1973 (gemini)

Species: Human/wizard

Blood Status: Halfblood

Sexuality: Pansexual

Alignment: Neutral Good

Residence: The family farm in the Irish countryside. It's huge, a bit outdated decoration-wise, and homey. His room is on the third floor, looking out over the field and he can see the sunrise if he wakes up early enough. The farm is so old and imbued with magic that Oliver can use underage magic without the Ministry finding out

Personality Type: ESFJ-A (the consul)

Magic

Wand: 13 3/4 inches of pliant pine wood encasing a phoenix feather core. The wand is thick and heavy, light in color, and with no defining marks other than Oliver's name carved into it with a knife. Doing this did not damage the wand in any way, but when Ollivander saw it he nearly had a heart attack.

Animagus: A mixed breed cat, Siamese/Ragdoll, similar to the stray cats that lounge around the farm

Misc. Magical Abilities: Legilimency and Occlumency, though he doesn't practice them often

Boggart Form: In earlier years, it was a werewolf, since one could be heard howling somewhere near the farm during full moons. As he got older and met actual werewolves like Chiara, Oliver lost his fear of them and his boggart changed to a mortally wounded vision of himself, having failed to save anyone from the vaults and meeting his own painful end

Riddikulus Form: The vision of himself is instead only afflicted with a concussion, with his Quidditch team mothering him as he insists he's fine

Amortentia (what do they smell like?): Oliver would smell like roast chicken, fresh tomatoes, and bright sunshine

Amortentia (what do they smell?): At the current point, Oliver smells the ocean, cat fur, and wood polish. As he has no strong romantic interest (though that may change very soon) the smells just make him happy and aren't related to any specific person

Patronus: Dolphin

Patronus Memory: His first time seeing the ocean. Nothing went wrong that day, and he got to see dolphins for the first time too. He and his family all had a great time together.

Mirror of Erised: His mother and grandparents standing proudly behind him. It's his graduation day, not an injury to him. Everything turned out okay

Specialized/Favorite Spells:

- Reficere Aspectu - temporarily repairs his vision. The spell he uses for Quidditch matches.

- Lumos, Aguamenti, Wingardium Leviosa - extremely useful spells for around the farm

- Arania Exumi - spider repellent is always useful

- Orchideous - he conjures flowers for his mother and grandmother all the time

- Reparo - the first Transfiguration spell he got on the first try

Appearance

[concept image made using the zepeto app]

Height: 6'3

Weight: 191 lbs

Physique: Skinny with noticeable muscles from all the Quidditch and farming

Eye Color: Light, slightly greyish blue

Hair Color: Dirty blonde, usually kept in a bowl cut that his mother gives him. Oliver knows it's not fashionable (Andre is constantly nagging him to change it) but he doesn't really care enough to learn hair charms

Skin Tone: Light, no freckles. He burns easily so when he comes back at the start of every year he's a bit pink

Body Modifications: His eyesight is atrocious. He wears round glasses most of the time and uses a temporary vision charm for Quidditch

Scarring: Oliver has a nasty scar on his back from being kicked by a cow as a kid, and some scratches on his arms and legs from the various animals and work around the farm

Fashion: This kid has no fashion. Andre is in hell. Oliver wears shorts whenever he can and t-shirts. If it's cold he'll add a flannel. Around sixth year he starts updating his wardrobe a bit, but keeps his usual clothing for around the farm. No point having decent clothing get all dirty and ripped up

Hogwarts

House: Gryffindor

Class Grades:

- Astronomy: E

- Care of Magical Creatures: E

- Charms: A

- Defense Against the Dark Arts: E

- Divination: E

- Flying: O

- Herbology: O

- History of Magic: A

- Potions: A

- Transfiguration: A

Quidditch: Keeper since year 3

Extracurriculars: Dragon Club, Gobstones Club

Favorite Professor: Professor McGonagall. She's his head of house, and she reminds Oliver a bit of his grandmother with her stern but kind nature. She encourages his love of Transfiguration, even if he isn't the best at it, and she's a huge Quidditch fan

Least Favorite Professor: Professor Dumbledore. Oliver is an easygoing, agreeable guy most of the time. He respects his elders as his grandparents taught him, but only when they deserve it. Dumbledore most certainly does not

Relationships

Mother: Katie Adams

- Katie is a shy, quiet woman. She was homeschooled for most of her life, receiving at-home tutoring in her later years as her mother Gertrude was unable to properly teach her what she needed to know, and she's only seen the inside of Hogwarts twice: when she sat in for her O.W.L.s and her N.E.W.T.s.

- As a mother, Katie made sure to raise Oliver to be kind and always drink his Respect Women Juice. She had him take on some of the farm duties at a young age to help teach him responsibility

- Oliver got kicked by a cow when she turned her back on him for no more than ten seconds. Katie's boggart is what would have happened had Oliver been standing slightly closer - he would have been paralyzed, as the kick would have hit his neck

Father: Kyle Donovan

- Oliver never knew him. He was a muggle who left Katie shortly after she became pregnant

- He was a decent guy in general, but the idea of being a father at the age of 24 scared him and he ran like a coward. He never knew about the Wizarding world, and even if he wanted to return to try and make amends he'll never be able to find the family farm ever again, thanks to Marvin

Grandfather: Marvin Adams

- Marvin is a cranky, slightly old fashioned kind of guy. He cares a lot about tradition and keeps telling Oliver that one day the farm will be his, and then his kids', and then their kids'. Oliver doesn't have the strength to tell him he's not sure he wants kids at all

- Marvin loves his wife. There were many times in their relationship where it looked like the marriage was about to fall apart, but they were somehow always able to get through them - mostly by him apologizing to Gertrude

- Oliver is able to hold his own in a duel thanks to Marvin. Despite being an old crud, he's got a lot of fight in him

Grandmother: Gertrude Adams

- Gertrude was horrified that Oliver was going to grow up without a male influence, which is why Katie never moved off the family farm with him. The old woman made Oliver learn to cook and sew so that he wouldn't be a useless husband in the future

- She's the type of person who'll say that she still dreams of marrying her teenage sweetheart and moving to an island with him, but she doesn't mean it. She loves her family and her life, but she does one day want to retire on an island

- After Oliver graduates Hogwarts and takes over the farm, Gertrude will finally be able to convince Marvin that they can retire without worrying over the farm, and they'll move to a lovely beach house. Her last ten years will be spent in her own little paradise

Love Interest: Isla Lyall @sapphicsaffir

- Isla is the twin sister of Vera, one of Oliver's closest friends in Gryffindor. Isla is in Ravenclaw, so originally they didn't spend much time together. However, Oliver always found Isla cuter than Vera

- People who didn't know them well thought Oliver and Vera liked each other, but anyone who did know them knew Vera would rather die, and that Oliver preferred the red haired twin over the blonde one

- Vera is the one who keeps pushing to get them together. She told Oliver that she knows Isla likes him, but he refused to believe it. Still, she kept trying, saying that if anyone had to be her brother-in-law she'd rather it be him

- In fourth year, Ravenclaw lost a crucial match and it took them out if running for the House Cup. Isla, a chaser, was disappointed, but went to the final match to support her sister and her crush

- Gryffindor won, and in the excitement, Isla ran up to Oliver and yanked him down so she could kiss him. Oliver understandably short-circuited, while Vera yelled "Finally!"

Best Friend: Andre Egwu

- When Oliver first met Andre, they didn't like each other at all. They were on opposing Quidditch teams, after all. But their mutual friends forced them to spend more time together, and now the two are practically inseparable. It makes little sense to most people.

- They're the kind of best friends who insult the living daylights out of each other to show their love

- They went as friends to the Celestial Ball. A few people got the wrong impression, but they've never considered dating each other. They feel more like brothers than anything else

Rival: Anyone on an opposing Quidditch team. Even if the rivalry doesn't affect them off the pitch, Oliver's instinctive reaction when he sees his opponents is one of distaste (ironic since both his best friend and his girlfriend are his rivals)

Enemy: Every last member of R

Dormmates:

- Charlie Weasley

- Ben Copper

- Jae Kim

Pets: a barn owl named Priscilla, and a sheepdog who stays at the farm named Sparky

Closest Canon Friends:

- Charlie Weasley

- Nymphadora Tonks

- Diego Caplan

Closest Noncanon Friends:

- Vera Lyall @sapphicsaffir

- The gang from @ask-hphm-crew

- Unnamed members of the Gryffindor Quidditch team

Storyline

- Oliver was raised a happy, carefree little boy. His incident with the cow never deterred him from helping his mum and grandparents around the farm, and he even gave the cow an "I'm sorry I provoked you" treat as soon as he could. He didn't ask about his father until he was ten, and Gertrude sat him down and told him what happened. Oliver resents the man that fled his mother. Gertrude knew he'd be angry and didn't tell him his father's name

- During his first couple years at Hogwarts, Oliver made friends and charmed his way into most of the professors' good graces. In year three Oliver joined the Gryffindor Quidditch team, and after his first match against Ravenclaw, he and Andre started butting heads until their other friends forced them to hang out more

- Oliver gets involved with the Cursed Vaults almost by accident. He has no cursed brother like the game says, but he does have a desire to help people, so when he hears of a group of students trying to save the school from certain doom, he gets involved right away

- His discovered Legilimency throws him for a loop, as no one in his family has that power. He rarely ever uses his mind reading without permission, but when it becomes necessary he's usually able to do it without the target finding out

- After Hogwarts, Oliver will take ownership of the family farm for a few years, but it's not his passion and he hates the idea of being stuck there for the rest of his life. At age twenty two he sells the farm to one of the farmhands with three young kids and uses the money to buy a bakery with an apartment above it. He grows some of his own ingredients and buys the rest at discount from the old farm, and also runs guitar lessons out of his apartment. His grandparents are a little disappointed, but they understand, and his mother reveals that she had a secret boyfriend who she moves in with and later marries. He's a nice man with a kid a little older than Oliver

- Oliver and Isla have a small wedding a little before the Battle of Hogwarts. A few years later, Isla gives birth to twin girls Kenzie and Kleio. Five years after that, their son Caspian is born

Extra Info

- Oliver is a family man through and through. If he had to, he would have stayed on the farm forever to support his family. When he has his own family, he's an extremely devoted father even though he was never sure he wanted children when he was younger

- Despite not moving on to play Quidditch professionally, Oliver does join a recreational team after he sells the farm, as does Andre, who starts up his own fashion line

- Oliver is a total house husband. Isla is a cursebreaker, and Oliver brags about her to whoever will listen. She often comes home to a fresh cooked meal/baked goods

- Oliver's a cat person. He adopts two stray kittens when he moves to the bakery and loves them with all his heart

- He can't be alone for more than a few days or he'll go crazy. He loves spending time with his friends or even meeting new people

- He starts playing the guitar at the age of seven. Marvin is the one to teach him. Later on he learns about the muggle electric guitar and buys one as soon as he can figure out how to get electricity into his apartment

- Oliver visits his grandparents at their beach house at least five times a year. He can't get enough of the ocean, even when it's too cold to go swimming (and he'll usually do it anyway)

- He's the tallest one in his immediate family. Oliver assumes he got his height from his father, but he actually got the height from Gertrude's side of the family

- Oliver will always prefer to cook himself than to go to a restaurant

- He's a fairly good dueler, but Diego could always kick his ass

- Oliver will try to arrange a big meetup with all of his friends at least once a year. Not everyone can make it every time, but he refuses to let their friendships fade into the past

- He loses the bowl cut in year seven, when Andre convinces Tonks and Diego to hold him down so Andre can fix his hair. Oliver ends up liking it and keeps it that way for years to come

#hogwarts mystery #oliver adams #character profile #hphm mc #zepeto

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astrojmonaf1 · 5 years

Text

A Neutron Star Merger, The Fall of A Formula One Hero, and a Belgian Maiden Grand Prix Win

The LIGO/Virgo collaboration teams, observed a gravitational wave event of a Neutron Star merger "with the probability that the source may have at least one object in between three and five solar masses" said LIGO, on September 1st.

📸: LIGO Twitter

Kilonova observations are extraordinarily rare, for when Neutron stars collide, the remnants left are showers of gold and platinum scattered into the universe. These showers bring forth metals like the ones found on Earth.

Elements beneficial to our very existence.

Although the remnants here are believed to have merged into a black hole.

Who would have imagined that to the world of Formula One, that same rip to the fabric of space and time of a binary system hundreds of millions of years in the making, could have different consequences in the racing track.

It would arrive the same day that Charles Leclerc would make his Maiden Grand Prix Win.

While one can’t be certain what Einstein meant when he said, "God does not play dice with the universe,” we can only think of this moment. The Universe may be 14 billion years old, and with that, heroes and legends can be made because heroes are not born. Through pain and tears, downforce and minimal drag, Gravity much like F=ma, can be good friends, but in one wrong Turn, all can become the enemy, to Formula One drivers.

They are made, on the track and in moments such as these.

Racing For Anthoine

Like the great Carl Sagan once said, “For small creatures such as we, the vastness is bearable only through love.”

Anthoine Hubert, 22, of France, lost his life at the Belgian Grand Prix on August 31st.

The Renault French driver, was involved in a major accident with American Sauber driver, Juan Manuel Correa, at the Spa-Francorchamps. Hubert's car hit the bars then collided with Correa’s.

Correa, underwent surgery and “will remain in intensive care for at least another 24 hours to ensure that his condition can continue to be monitored by his surgical team,” read the official statement released on his website.

Anthoine Hubert, succumbed to his injuries after that tragic accident at Spa-Francorchamps.

A childhood friend to Charles Leclerc, someone he raced Karts with, laughed with, and joked with, perhaps looked up to race with head to head in this very track, the Monegasque now ran alone.

For Charles Leclerc, securing his maiden win at the Belgian Grand Prix, wouldn’t be the first place in his legacy, but a bequest to honor the memory of his now departed childhood friend.

Notwithstanding, everyone was racing for Anthoine and to honor his memory.

This was no ordinary race and as challenging as it was it would become one to remember.

The morning of Charles’ race, he'd been seen by the media talking to Anthoine’s family.

His mother, Nathalie, Father Victhor and brother Francois, gave him their support, as Nathalie embraced him.

That heartbreaking sight will live in the hearts of fans forever.

The Love of a Mother

📸: Kym Illman

It might have instilled love and strength in the Monegasque and a little extra push to go with the respect of millions of fans as a reminder that Anthoine would have wanted him to get to P1.

His last race having been practically stolen in Bahrain, this time, nothing would get in his way.

Phased, and unbelieving that any of it had happened, Anthoine’s loss, and his win, Charles said: “We were four kids dreaming of getting to Formula One.”

Anthoine Hubert, Charles Leclerc, Esteban Ocon and Pierre Gasly.

“We have grown up in karting together, so to lose him is a big shock for me, and everyone in the sport.”

“It was definitely the first situation for me where I have lost someone and then raced the following day. It is obviously quite challenging to close the visor and go through the exact corner —where he died— at the same speed as I did the day before.

Pierre Gasly, the Toro Rosso driver, gave Leclerc a little fuel to win the race too, had the words “ALWAYS WITH ME #AH19,” above the open view of his halo:

“I've grown up with this guy since I was seven in karting, we've been roommates, we've lived in the same apartment, in the same room for six years."

“We’ve been class mates, I’ve studied since I was 13 until 19 with him, with the same professor at a private school that the federation did. I’m still shocked.”

“You have to put it out of your mind because otherwise, you can’t race,” he added,

“I told Charles before the race: Please win this race for Anthoine, as we started racing in the same year, Charles, Anthoine, and myself. And Anthoine won the French Cup in 2005. We raced for many years and knew each other.”

Overtaken in Bahrain by a one-two Mercedes win, and getting wheel banged by Red Bull's, Max Verstappen in Austria, back in July, costing him-his first win, this one; means more.

“We lost a friend first of all — I would like to dedicate my first win to him. In my first race, we drove together, it's a shame what happened yesterday, I can't enjoy my victory fully.” Charles added.

"It is difficult to enjoy this victory, but hopefully, in two or three weeks, I will realize what happened.”

Everyone was cheering for Ferrari’s 16 to win it for Renault’s 19.

In the aftermath of Hubert’s passing, it’s hard to express what Leclerc must’ve felt like when he got to lap 19.

19 was Anthoine’s racing number, and the crowds paid tribute as well when the drivers came through.

it was no consequence that of all days, that Neutron Star Merger would be named S190901ap. The date that recorded the LIGO/Virgo's Neutron Stars Merger, which coincided with Anthoine's number.

And then you heard a solemn “This one is for Anthoine,” coming from Ferrari’s radio, said by Charles Leclerc upon finishing first.

Everyone burst, there was commotion everywhere, a good day and a sad day in Motorsports indeed for all the right reasons.

“It’s a good day but on the other hand losing Anthoine yesterday brings me back to 2005, my first ever French championship,” continued Leclerc during an interview.

📸: Kym Illman

A League of His Own

Seeing the Monegasque separate the Silver Arrows and keep good pace through and through, was what Formula One is all about, but is unfathomable to know how he must’ve felt while driving down Spa’s circuit or how he feels now that it’s been completed.

As youth of this new century, explorers and pioneers, one often forgets that millennials have much on their shoulders.

They’re here to make a name for themselves, and it's undeniable that on the way to greatness, they’re bound to lose those they love because this sport is ruthless.

Charles Leclerc won't be the exception, to the rule, but he's been the valid example of losing in every aspect and yet here he is. Racing and winning. Nothing deters his will to keep going.

The Scuderia Ferrari driver, and godson to Jules Bianchi, the last casualty to the sport before Hubert, is the living reminder that today's youth, still have plenty to look up to and much to fight for.

You could see him in the podium wearing a black armband with his entire Ferrari Team, as he raised his Trophy to the sky in honor of Anthoine.

Empowering generations of new drivers to not feel like outsiders. He might have lost a friend, his godfather, his father, that battle on two multifarious and defining races before, but on his third, he got his maiden trophy with a little help from above.

Lewis Hamilton of Mercedes spoke encomiums of Charles Leclerc after the race.

"It's not easy for any driver to jump into a top team like Ferrari against a four-time world champion, with much more experience, and then to continuously out-perform, out-qualify and out-drive him. But Charles’ results speak for themselves. There is a lot more greatness to come from him, and I am looking forward to racing alongside him in the future.”

“Then once I got in the car, as I did for my father two years ago, you need to put all the emotions to one side and focus on the job.”

Said, Leclerc “I was happy to win and remember him the way he deserved to be and, yeah, happy to do it on this day.”

"They are so much faster than us and Monza is all straights ... We will do our best, but it is going to be a tough job to match them.”

He lamented his inability to master those straights like Leclerc, before. Something the Monegasque is seemingly able to do. Monza will be the place to put the five time World Champion to a test.

"So, there's a lot more greatness to come from him and I'm looking forward to seeing his growth and racing alongside him ... Today, it was fun, trying to chase him. He was just a little bit too quick.”

Maybe, Chekhov was right after all about Entropy, that beautiful chaos that makes our universe work, It does come easy, but as I wrote in my book, “Entropy comes easy, but Love outgrows the Universe,”©️

"I was struggling in the corners, so that allowed him to get close," said Sebastian Vettel of Ferrari and Leclerc's Team mate.

"I couldn't hold him off for a very long time. I tried to obviously make him [Hamilton] lose time in order to give Charles a cushion, and in the end it was just enough, so it did the job.

"I couldn't stay in range to look after myself, and I was sort of playing a road block to make sure that Charles was gaining some time." He did everything to help his team mate achieve his first victory.

In a statement given by Daniel Ricciardo from Team Renault, he too admitted not wanting to race following Hubert’s untimely death.

“I know that, weirdly enough, the best way we can kind of show our respect was to race today,”

“But I don’t think any of us actually wanted to be here or wanted to race”

“At least, I’m speaking for myself, but I’m sure I’m not the only one. It was certainly tough to be here and try to put on a brave face for everyone.”

“I know a lot of people in the paddock are hurting so I think everyone’s relieved it’s done, we can move on from here, and hopefully it’s the last time that this happens.”

For the Renault fans, Ricciardo racing that day meant everything.

To know that a driver from his team had perished, how does one reconcile, to keep the morale high for the millions of fans aching so racing is the answer.

Is the one thing the Aussie does to help the fans, and he does it well. We appreciate the effort even when we know the heartbreak he's feeling. A collective effort from everyone now to help each other heed the call of the F1 neighbor even on social media.

We love him for it.

It becomes a Labor of Love.

“Since I was a child I’ve been looking up to Formula 1, dreaming to be first a Formula 1 driver, which happened last year, then driving for Ferrari this year, and then the first win today.”

“It’s a good day, but on the other hand, as I said, losing Anthoine yesterday brings me back to 2005, my first ever French championship. There was him, Esteban [Ocon], Pierre [Gasly] and myself. We were four kids that were dreaming of Formula 1. We grew up in karting for many, many years, and to lose him yesterday was a big shock for me but obviously for everyone in motorsport, so it was a very sad day.” - Charles Leclerc

A day filled with grief, racing, camaraderie, and the inextricable reminder that; the Universe is always at work.

Congratulations, Charles Leclerc and Team Ferrari for a well-deserved win.

We knew you had it all along.

“And when you want something, all the Universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” Paolo Coelho

Jen McCulley TM Sep 2, 2019

#charles leclerc #anthoine hubert #sebastian vettel #lewis hamilton #daniel ricciardo #pierre gasly #esteban ocon #scuderia ferrari #charles 16 #formula 1 #formula1 #essere ferrari #formula one #f1 #racing for anthoine #belgian grand prix #belgiangp #belgium gp 2019

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brokemultidotexe · 6 years

Text

Life in the Fastlane

Pairing: Racer!Yoongi x Reader

Summary: Street racing wasn't something you wanted to experience until your roommate dragged you to one. You end up realizing that it's nothing like the movies and that the bad boys can be the ones with the biggest hearts

Word Count: 5.5k

Warning: None

Genre: Action(?)

Part: ONESHOT

You glanced at yourself in the mirror. Jimin had managed to push you out of your comfort zone for tonight. You had promised Jimin last month that you would finally go watch him race. The fact that it was illegal didn't sit well with you but you eventually gave up that argument after watching Jimin’s face light up when he would talk about it. Since the cheating boyfriend fiasco, you hadn't been smiling much and that's how you ended up here in black skinny jeans that were just a little too low and a little too tight. The shirt was too low for your liking and hugged your curves and while this wasn’t something you would normally wear it was hard not to admit that you looked hot.

"Y/N get your sexy ass out here, it's time to go." You looked at the clock, it was already eleven o'clock. You took one more look at yourself in the mirror.

"It's only one night." you told yourself, "we're doing this for Jimin."

"Y/N!"

You jumped at the sudden yelling. You grabbed your phone and license; you didn't want to carry a purse. You walked out of your bedroom and could see Jimin standing by the door with his arms crossed. Of course, Jimin was just dressed in a fitted t-shirt that showed off just how nice his body was and some ripped jeans. It took a lot of arguing for you to agree to wear this after Jimin claimed you would stick out like a sore thumb and everyone would stare at you. You weren’t one to welcome attention so you decided to follow your best friend's advice.

It took all of thirty minutes to get there. You hated Jimin's bucket seats in his car and it felt odd having the back seat completely gutted. Jimin pulled up and parked into a line with a bunch of other cars. It honestly looked like an independent film version of Fast and the Furious that was close to reaching the end of their budget. She snorted at her own thoughts and Jimin raised an eyebrow at her before getting out of the car and walking around to the front of his car. You soon followed and walked up to Jimin and you leaned your hip against the front of Jimin's car.

"So, what now?" You looked around and there were about thirty to forty people mingling, some were drinking others weren't.

"Well, I have to find Yoongi and give him my share." You watched Jimin pull out a wad of money. You learned awhile back to not ask where he got that kind of money. "Will you be okay by yourself for a few minutes?"

"Yeah." Truthfully, you didn't want to be left alone but you also didn't want to look like a lost puppy following Jimin around. You watched as Jimin left and you folded your arms across your chest and looked out over all the people. You felt so out of place but you found this group of people oddly interesting. It was like watching a family reunion or something. Your eyes roamed your surroundings and fell on the building behind everyone. You saw the letters sprawled across it Kim and Sons Auto Shop.

"Well, I haven't seen you around here." You looked to your left and saw a guy with a hoodie and noticed his eyes looked at your body from top to bottom. "You must be my divine intervention for the night." His voice made you roll your eyes.

"I doubt it," you said dryly. You weren’t in the mood to deal with anyone; you were here for one reason and one reason only. To support Jimin and then get home and binge watch Netflix until you passed out.

The guy raised his eyebrow and took a step closer, "I could get us out of here, take you to my place nearby and give you a night you won't ever forget." He ran his hand down the curve of your side resting on her hip.

You scoffed, "You've got a hand, which I can promise you will be the only action you'll be getting tonight."

"You've got a mouth on you, I bet-"

"Jeon!" You watched as the guy turned around. Your eyes went to the guy walking over to them. The guy was in ripped jeans, combat boots, a white shirt with a button-up shirt opened over it. You were jealous of the guy's boots. If only you could afford a pair that nice. The guy pulled the guy's shirt causing the guy to stumble away from them. "The girl is out of your league Jungkook, you want a level playing field go grab one of the whores congregated around hyung."

"Screw you Hoseok, the girl can make her own-" You watched as the guy grabbed Jungkook by the collarbone and roughly pulled him towards him to get him off balance and then turning and kicked his back causing him to stumble away from him. Jungkook glared and cursed at Hoseok but he was unphased by it. Your eyes were wide watching the exchange between them.

"Why don't you get one of the whores to go nurse that injury?" Hoseok said as Jungkook walked away with his hand rubbing his back. Hoseok turned and held his hand out to you, "I'm Hoseok."

You shook his hand, "Y/N." You peeked over Hoseok's shoulder to see Jungkook heading back over to the group of people you saw before.

"Ignore Jungkook, the punk thinks he's God's gift to women when he’s on something. From what I've heard though is that God shortchanged him in a vital area." You found yourself laughing, "So are you here by yourself?"

Just as you were about to answer Jimin walked up, "Okay, we're good now. I wanted to take you to meet-"

"Yo Park!" Jimin turned around and smiled. You watched as they fist bumped and Hoseok swung his arm over Jimin's shoulders.

"Y/N, meet Hoseok." Jimin looked between his two friends with a look of hope.

"You can call me Hobi." Hobi smiled, "But we've met, Jungkook tried to lure your girl home."

Jimin laughed out loud, "I would have loved to see him try." he looked at Hobi, "Are you racing tonight?"

Hobi rolled his eyes, "It's my turn for flags."

Jimin laughed and Y/N was confused and apparently, it showed, "flags are the flag or makeshift flag that you bring down at the line for the race to start. Unfortunately, Hobi here picked the short straw." you laughed as Hobi grumbled.

"Actually, since I'm not racing tonight I was wondering if you could take a peek under my hood. I don't want Yoongi sniffing around, he'd probably change out a part to help him win."

"Why would some random guy come sniffing around your car?" you asked and the looks you got made you embarrassed by your question.

"Yoongi is Hobi's brother, he runs the races." you made an o shape with your mouth and nodded.

“Adopted brother, but he’s still my hyung.” You could see the underlying affection he had for his older brother despite the normal sibling annoyance.

You turned at the sound of a deep voice carrying over the crowd, "Alright, we've got four racing tonight. Taehyung and Jin just radioed back and the roads are blocked and ready to go. Get your shit and let's roll!" The small crowd cheered and you looked back to see both guys looking excited.

"That's my cue." Jimin gave Hobi a fist bump and turned to give you a hug, "See you at the finish line" he winked and you watched him walk away.

"You ready to see how we live?" Hobi smirked.

"Let's do this." Hobi cheered and you laughed to yourself but followed Hobi as he led the way into the sea of people. You walked through and you saw all the different types of people. You could see why Jimin fit in here.

"Tae! Jin!" Hobi grabbed your hand and dragged you over to two guys.

"Yo!" They both smiled at the guy, "Jimin tells me you drew the short straw tonight."

Hobi gave them both the finger before turning to you, "Y/N this is Tae and Jin, they work here at the garage with my brother."

The guy that looked like he should be on the cover of Vogue shook your hand, "Ravi de vous rencontrer" you gave him a small smile before you dropped his hand. You could see Hobi rolling his eyes.

"We need to go; otherwise Yoongi will start bitching at me." Hobi started walking towards the cars and you followed. Once Hobi broke through the crowd you saw four cars lined up behind a spray-painted line. “I bet he rigged the straw pull so I would have to sit out for this race.” You glanced over at Hobi and laughed.

"Someone say my name?" You looked towards the voice. Your eyes raked over his body. From his stark white hair to the plain gray t-shirt. You could admit to yourself that he was hot.

"Yoongi this is Y/N, Jimin's friend that he’s been talking about." Hobi smiled at his brother.

"Ah, the infamous hermit." You felt your face heat up. "Glad you could join us rebels tonight." Yoongi winked at you and you just raised an eyebrow.

"So, are we ready?" Hobi asked.

"Nah, Jeon showed up bitching about his back.” He glanced at Hobi before continuing, “but serves him right with the way he goes for girls who are spoken for while their guy is here." Yoongi shrugged. "He went inside the shop to lay down." you could see Hobi looking smug, obviously proud of himself.

"Hobi you said you wanted me to look under your hood right?" Jimin was walking towards what you assumed was Hobi's car.

"Wait, why is Jimin checking under your hood? You're here every day. I mean fuck you work here. I could have done it yesterday." Yoongi had his arms crossed.

"Because I'm so close to leaving your ass in the dust, and who knows what you'd pull," Hobi called over his shoulder leaving you alone with Yoongi.

"Nice best friend you have."

"Nice brother you have." you challenged which caused him to raise an eyebrow at you.

"Well aren't you a spitfire." You rolled your eyes, "So what did Park have to do to drag you out here? Steal your books? Hold your laptop hostage?" you didn't say a word, all you had to say you could express with your middle finger. Yoongi smirked, "Is that an offer?"

You felt your face grow hot and you looked over at Hobi and Jimin, who was already under the hood. "So, when did all of this start?" you found yourself asking.

"What do you mean?" You just twirled your finger around motioning to all the people and cars, "Oh, it’s pretty much been the same group of people for a long time. Park is probably the newest member. Your boy has skills, I'll give him that."

"So, are you racing too?" Yoongi nodded. "So how much is riding on this race anyway?"

Yoongi shrugged, "Not a lot, about three grand."

"Three thousand? As in dollars?" It felt like your eyes had actually bulged out of your head.

"What else would it be in? Monopoly money?" his chuckle irritated you.

"How is that not a lot of money?"

"Races can easily get up to at least eight grand on a good night. I guess I don't really think about it being an obscene amount anymore." you were speechless. Was he out of touch with reality? Because you could never imagine eight thousand dollars not being a lot of money and you came from a very well to do family.

"Alright let's get this over with" a voice behind you made you jump and she saw Jungkook make his way towards his car not even sparing a glance at you, but you could see him limp just a little bit.

Yoongi laughed out loud "You look like shit Jeon."

"Fuck you!" Jungkook got in his car and Yoongi called out to Hobi to round up everyone. You just stood there as everyone started moving towards the lineup.

"Hey stay here, if you have any problems just yell for Tae or Jin" You nodded hearing Hobi yell over at you and you watched Hobi give you a wink from across a few cars as he walked out in front of the cars. He waited until everyone was in their respective cars. It looked like it was going to be Jimin, Jungkook, and Yoongi. You didn't know what to expect but you jumped hearing all the cars start up. Hobi pointed to each car and each revved its engine. You assumed this meant that they were ready.

"Hobi, use your shirts!" You turned and saw that Jin was the one yelling as he stood up in his truck bed. Hobi gave him the finger but took off the button up shirt and held it up. You chewed on your bottom lip, your stomach was doing somersaults. You were nervous and excited all at the same time, you had no idea what to expect. You watched as Hobi raised his shirt over his head using it as a flag. He held it there for a few seconds before bringing it down. He crouched and turned to watch all three cars shoot off the line and down the road. It didn't take long before all three cars were out of sight. Hobi stood up and walked towards you your hair windblown but donning a huge smile on your face.

"Awesome isn't it?" You couldn't help but smile with him. The guy’s energy was contagious.

"So how long does the race normally last?"

Hobi shrugged, "Depends who's driving, but with hyung it's normally about four or five minutes."

Y/N didn't know if that was slow or fast, but it sounded really fast. Your eyes stayed on the street as Hobi explained that the track would loop all the way back around to here so they didn't have to go anywhere. They just had to sit and wait. After a few minutes, Hobi bit his lip and bounced on his feet.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, it's just that normally we start picking up the cones now from the roads so the cops are less likely to get called. Tae asked me to go with him because Jin went to get food because he had the munchies."

"Go ahead, you can go. I'll be fine." You waved him off.

"You sure?" you watched Hobi chew on his bottom lip.

"Yeah. Go." You watched as Hobi gave you a smile and told you that he'd be right back. You just stood there watching for the cars, it felt like forever but you were sure it was just your eagerness to see the end of the race. You watched Jin’s truck pull out onto the road with Hobi sitting on the side.

You were bouncing on your toes the anticipation was killing you. "COPS!" You spun around looking and everyone was splitting up and jumping in cars. You could hear the sirens off in the distant. You didn't have a car, Jimin was your ride and you had absolutely no idea what to do. People were pulling out and you didn't know a single person. Everyone you knew was either racing or gone.

You saw a black car screech to a stop in front of you. The door flew open, "Get in!" before you had time to even make a decision your body was in the car and pulled away fast enough to throw you back against the seat.

You looked over at Yoongi. His face was hard with concentration. Your heart was still pounding in your chest. You never expected cops to show up, yet the adrenaline had you on a high that you had never felt before. You found yourself smiling and eventually found yourself laughing.

Yoongi turned his head to look at you, "You think this is funny?"

You couldn't catch your breath but you were waving your hands and shaking your head no. But your body was betraying you. You couldn't stop the tears from forming in your eyes from laughing. "I'm sorry." you tried to get a grip of your giggles, "I've just never been through anything like that." You were trying to take deep breaths between each attempt talk. "I honestly don't know why I'm laughing."

Yoongi smirked, "It seems the hermit experienced her first adrenaline rush."

Your eyes widen seeing a cop car pulling towards the center of an intersection, "Yoongi!" your hand went to his arm and Yoongi's attention shot back to driving and your breath hitched in your throat as Yoongi whipped his car to the right. The back of his car barely missing the cop car as he shifted and pushed the car even faster straightening them out.

"Y/N you can let go now," Yoongi said through a clenched jaw. You looked at her hand and immediately removed it. He had nail marks on his arm where you were gripping him so tightly.

"I'm so sorry!"

Yoongi laughed, "Its fine. Normally when I get to feel nails digging into me, it's on my back while I'm fucking someone."

You scrunched up your nose at his narcissism, but couldn't ignore the skip in your heartbeat. You leaned back watching Yoongi navigate the streets with ease, but you could still hear the sirens which kept you from getting pulled in at watching Yoongi drive.

"Does this happen every time you guys race?" Yoongi shook his head.

"Nah, I mean it happens every once in a while, but we try to keep it as low profile as we can. Tae and Jin set up traffic cones at some intersections that cross into the route we take. But sometimes the cops come looking, that's why we have radios." He motioned to the one sitting in his cup holder, "If anyone sees the cops coming everyone knows to get out fast. Everyone has their own place they go so they don't follow one another and end up with all of us if they manage to follow us."

You bit your lip, "Has anyone ever been caught?"

Yoongi's mouth thinned. "Namjoon, he um" He cleared his throat, "He flipped his car taking a turn while running. He was okay luckily, but they ended up taking him in. They gave him a deal, he could tell them what he knew about our club and he'd only get six months. He ended up telling them to go fuck themselves which ended with him serving a year." Yoongi was concentrating on the road but you could tell he could probably navigate these roads with his eyes closed. "He gets out in three months."

It made you worry about Jimin racing. You didn't know what you would do if your best friend ended up in jail. Yoongi looked over at you. He didn't say anything but after a moment put his attention back on the road, "If you're worried about Park don't. He's a great racer, probably better than most of the people that have been racing with me for years. He'd be able to ditch them easily. While his car doesn't have as much power as mine it can turn a corner on a pinpoint. It's actually pretty impressive." This made you beam with pride.

"So where exactly are we going?" You had already gotten lost after about the ninth turn.

Yoongi smirked, "We're almost there."

You looked out the window. You had been driving around for about a half hour and managed to get far enough to where they no longer heard sirens about fifteen minutes ago. You weren’t sure just how far the location he chose was. Your ears perked up once you heard the crunch of gravel under the tires. "Seriously where are-" your question was cut off when you saw his headlights shining over a lake. "This is where you go?" you looked over at him and you watched him shrug as he came to a stop and turned the car off. He unbuckled the seatbelt and got out of the car. You followed and had your hands wrapped around you as you walked towards the water. The moon was reflecting on the water. You really wanted to take a picture of it with your camera because the scenery was absolutely beautiful.

"You know I've come out here quite a few times and I've never met a single soul. I like to think this means that no one knows about it." You watched as Yoongi walked over to an old picnic table and sat on the table propping his feet on the bench. He waved you over, "Come on we've got some time to kill before we meet back up."

You walked over and sat on the table. You barely knew this guy and here you were in the middle of the night by a lake. Like that wasn't weird or anything, but you didn't feel any uneasiness. You actually felt very comfortable around Yoongi. "So, what got you into racing?" you looked over at him. His elbows were resting on his knees as he looked away.

"Sorry, you don't have to answer that." Your cheeks flushed in embarrassment of possibly crossing the line with someone you just met.

Yoongi was shaking his head, "No it's alright." He cleared his throat and sat up resting back on his hands. "So, I've known Namjoon all my life, he lived right down the street from me and Hobi. It wasn't exactly the best neighborhood and after a few fights, Namjoon’s dad started inviting me over. He would have both me and Namjoon working on cars with him until it got dark. It kept us out of trouble and me and Hoseok didn't exactly have a father figure. Eventually, he started tagging along once my mom picked up her second job. So, all three of us would be over there and he would teach us everything he knew about cars." Yoongi smiled, "He always loved the fact that Hobi constantly kept the mood happy and bright. But the three of us never outgrew our love for cars, even after Namjoon’s dad taught us everything he knew. We all took auto shop in high school and it was a joke because we had already learned everything they were trying to teach us. When it came time to start thinking about college's we knew our mom couldn't afford to send us. A cousin had told Namjoon about racing and how his brother made decent money. So Namjoon and I started building a car together while we worked full time that summer, I gave my mom what I could to help but the rest went to parts. We built that car from the ground up and by the end of the summer we were finally able to race."

You were completely engrossed in his story, "So I'm assuming you won your first race."

Yoongi laughed, "Oh hell no, the engine stalled after the fourth turn. We had to roll the car home." He looked over at you, "But we learned what worked and what didn't. Eventually, we started winning and each time we won Namjoon would refuse his share, he told me to put it towards Hoseok’s college fund. My mom never found out, she thought we both got great scholarships." You couldn't help but smile with him. "I managed to get a semester out from graduating before I dropped out."

"Why?" You weren’t expecting that.

"Namjoon’s dad got really sick and Namjoon was still in college and was on an actual scholarship. His dad needed help in the shop and I knew he wouldn't ask any of us. So, I told him I graduated early and that I'd help him in the shop until I found a job. This man single-handedly made sure that both Hoseok and I stayed out of trouble and brought us into his family, and you don't walk away from family. So, I started working there full time. The pay wasn't an issue, I made enough racing that it covered whatever his dad couldn't afford. Eventually, he got too sick to come in, so I took over until Namjoon graduated." Yoongi shrugged, "I never really thought twice about my decisions. Eventually, his dad passed and Namjoon got the shop, I guess even though things changed I didn't. I never left and went back to school. I stayed and helped Namjoon run the shop and once Namjoon got arrested he asked me to take over until he got out."

"So does Hobi work at the shop?"

Yoongi nodded, "Yeah, he works there when he's on breaks and sometimes during the week."

You smiled, “I guess a family that races together stays together."

"Eh, kinda. I never wanted Hoseok to start racing, I did everything I could to make sure he never had to."

"Are you still helping pay for his schooling?"

Yoongi shook his head chuckling, "No, he pays for it all on his own. We fought for the longest time about him racing. He'd come with me so I guess part of it is my fault; I mean I introduced him to all of it. He has an actual scholarship now; he races because he wants to. We fought for months about it; I wanted him to concentrate on school. Eventually, he told me he was going to race and it could either be with our group or he'd go find another. I knew he'd be safer with me than anywhere else, so he races and I get to deal with his smug smile every time he wins." Yoongi leaned up and brushed his hands off on his jeans, "What about you? You're practically the exact opposite of Jimin from everything I hear. How did you two end up roommates?"

You laughed, "That's actually a funny story."

"Go on." He motioned her with his hand.

You rolled your eyes, "So I applied out here in my senior year of high school because I wanted to get as far away from my mother as possible. So, freshmen year I get assigned my dorm room and I get Jimin's cousin as my roommate. We hated each other, I wanted to concentrate on my studies and she wanted to do every possible thing she could to drive me insane. Anyways, we both start dating around the same time; things get easier because we're never there at the same time." You glanced over to see if he was still listening. He seemed genuinely interested in your story, so you continued. "This goes on for almost our whole freshmen year until eventually his cousin is kicking him out of his room and he’s forced to bunk with me because he had nowhere to go. As time went on we ended up getting along closer and getting more personal with our talks. We're two months out from summer break and come to find out me and his cousin have been dating the same guy who happened to be Jimin’s roommate. I had never been to my boyfriend’s dorm so I never knew who his roommate was and when we did talk he always referred to Jimin as his roommate."

Yoongi started laughing, "You and Park didn’t realize this from the beginning? Wow, now I get why you two are so close."

You stuck your tongue out at him, "Jimin basically ended up being my roommate because I guess his cousin didn’t care about the cheating and refused to give Jimin his dorm back. He helped me heal my broken heart and practically disowned his cousin for being a dumbass and being a bitch about the whole thing. I almost told the guy I was pregnant just to make him suffer a bit.”

Yoongi groans, "oh my god." His face goes into his hands, "I know the guy is an asshole but damn, that's brutal." But you could tell he was having a hard time not laughing.

"Well, I didn’t do it!."

He shook his head, "Girls are crazy, like batshit fucking crazy."

"Careful, you're out here with a crazy girl in the middle of the night with no one in sight with a lake to toss a body in." You raised an eyebrow at him.

He leaned closer, "I'd love to see you try."

You continued to talk until Yoongi checked his phone. You could see his mouth frown in the glow of his phone screen. "I think we're good to head back now, I'll drop you off at your house."

"Okay." Yoongi helped you off the table and you got into the passenger seat while Yoongi held the door for you. He came around and got in starting the car.

"I think Park is going to kill me." You were about to ask why when your eyes fell on the time glowing from his dashboard. You had been out there for almost three hours.

"I think you're right." You ran your hands over your pockets, "Shit. I don't have my phone."

"I know." Yoongi looked at you and you groaned.

"I'm so sorry! I promise I'll shield your body if he comes out waving a knife." Yoongi laughed and you shot him a glare.

"I'm sorry but I just can't imagine you taking on Park." you raised an eyebrow, "What? I've seen Jimin lay out a guy double his size because he leaned on his car." You couldn't help but laugh.

It took about ten minutes until he pulled up to the small house you and Jimin shared. You heard Yoongi groan, "What?" He pointed to the car parked on the street.

"That's my brother’s car and I don't feel like facing the Spanish Inquisition. So, I think I'm going to do the most un-gentlemanly thing I've ever done and tell you goodnight from the safety of my own car."

"Oh, that's fair; send me in there all by myself."

"Exactly."

You rolled your eyes but you opened the door and got out. You almost closed the door but stopped and bent your head down so you could see him, "Thanks for saving me tonight, I actually enjoyed myself."

Yoongi leaned over into the passenger seat and looked up at you, "So does that mean we'll see you again?"

You bit your lip and smiled, "Possibly." Yoongi raised an eyebrow but smirked at you which caused you to roll your eyes, "Goodnight Yoongi."

"Goodnight Y/N." You closed the door and walked up the rest of the driveway and turned the doorknob and walked in. You saw two flashes of black hair and a pair of eyes glaring at you and Jimin was up and rushing at you before you could move.

"Where the hell have you been!? I called you a million times! I thought something happened to you!" Jimin was swatting at you over and over again as he talked.

"Ow ow ow! Calm down! I didn't have my phone!" You were rubbing her arms; you forgot how hard Jimin could hit.

"Yes, I noticed once I heard the buzzing on my floorboard!"

"I'm sorry okay! Yoongi stopped and picked me up." You really did feel bad about making your best friend worry. Jimin hadn't even popped into your mind once the car had stopped which didn't make you feel any better.

"That doesn't take three hours Y/N!" You could see that Jimin was slowly losing steam which was a small victory.

"In my defense, it took like a half hour to get to the lake."

"No, it doesn't." You looked at Hobi sitting at the table with his foot propped up on the chair, "It takes like ten minutes to get to the lake from the shop."

Jimin spun around to look at Hobi "You knew he was there?" he yelled.

Hobi shook his head, "No, I knew he had her. But we don't tell each other where we go. We don't want the other one to come in trying to be the hero" he shrugged.

"Then why did it take thirty minutes?" You were so confused.

Hobi smirked as he took a drink from his glass, "It seems to me he wanted an excuse to spend time with you."

AN: This has been sitting around for a while and I felt like finishing it up quickly because who doesn’t like the thought of a racer!Yoongi. Hopefully, you enjoy this as much as I did writing it. It hasn’t been looked over to look for mistakes because my fingers are tired and I still have to write tags lol.

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maxheadley · 6 years

Text

Saturday; Wake Up

Darkness swallowed Timothy. Shadows wallowed in her prepherial vision. A cold draft caressed her skin, causing goosebumps to rise all over her arms and legs. She shuddered unintentionally. Her ears depicted the sound of heavy breathing and water dripping from a faucet on the other side of the dark room. She grasped onto her knee, which unfortunately throbbed painfully, underneath her fingers and against her palm, swollen flesh lay. She vaguely remembered what happened the night before. The one memory she had; was Terra slamming an aluminum silver baseball bat across her face. After that, Timothy blacked out.

Timothy went over the events of the previous day. Everything had been perfect, except the last two hours of her life. Friday was a nightmare came true. She hated Winnie for what she'd done. Why kidnap her? Why intentionally harm her? She frustratedly sighed, reaching for anything she could haul herself up. Exploring the smooth, wall, her fingers brushed a cold, iron bar and immediately launched herself up. She groaned, painfully as she accidentally put pressure on her leg. She decided to call out. Obviously someone else was in the room. Hopefully, someone who could help her.

"Hello? Is anyone else in here? I can hear your breathing." Timothy's voice echoed around the room and she grimaced, hating the way her voice sounded. Desperate and pained. Couple seconds later, her husband's voice hit her ears. He croaked, his throat parched. "Timothy? Where are you?" She heard shuffling and suspected he'd gotten up.

She swallowed the gathering salvia in her mouth and ran a hand through her disheveled hair. "I'm on the other side of the room. I can't walk.." She murmured, limply pushing against the wall.

"Alright, I'll come to you."

Wondering how Harley could possibly find her in the dark, Timothy rubbed her throbbing knee. She depicted his footsteps and the creaking sounds where his feet stepped. She reached out and collided with his chest. "Now, I know it's you." She smiled, even though the darkness concealed her face.

Harley's rough fingers covered her hand and inched closer til their chests brushed. He cupped her cheek with such gentleness Timothy thought he might be thinking she was suspiciously susceptible to being broken. She wasn't that fragile. Goosebumps scattered across her porcelain skin. "Are you okay?" He whispered, his lips close.

"My knee hurts, but otherwise I'm okay." She whispered back, placing her hand on top of where his heart beat like a drum. She could tell his heartbeat was irregular. His heart hardly raced. Panic and worry probably sent anxiety trailing all through him. "Are you?"

She felt his shoulders slump immediately, like the tension had been burned out and replaced by mush. "My head hurts to tell you the truth, other than that minor problem, I am fine. I am worried about what's going to happen to us. Any idea where and why we're here?"

Timothy opened her mouth, intending to respond, but a sudden burst of light sent her recoiling. She covered her eyes. The brightness made her dizzy. She adjusted, although continued to squint. She saw the lights had been switched on and the door swung open revealing two dark silhouettes. Both appeared female.

They both stepped into the light, revealing themselves as Winnie and Terra. Timothy suppressed a growl. If she weren't injured, she'd claw Winnie's eyes out on the spot. She glowered from afar as Harley stood halfway in front of her, protectively. He, too, glowered.

Winnie held a tray in her hands. Assortment of food was scattered all over as well as juice pouch. Terra also had a tray with similar food choices on it. They both wore different types of workout clothes and had their hair in buns. Timothy suspected they dressed comfortably simply because if they were to end up in an altercation with the couple, they wouldn't have problems. Unfortunately, for Timothy, her injury prevented her. Harley stood rigid and his body language told her, he wasn't about to jeopardize the situation and act out. He preferred knowing all the facts and information rather than act a fool. Another reason she trusted him.

"Hello." Harley cleared his throat. His voice strained.

"Hi." Winnie said, almost too cheerily. Her mother shot her a scornful glance. Winnie recoiled, averting her bright eyes to her green Nike's.

Terra sat the tray she carried on a round, old black chipped wooden table and spoke nonchalantly. Her charcoal eyes glancing at the couple. "We came to bring you some food, I presume you're both starved and parched." She also placed Winnie's on the table. Timothy actually happened to be starving, but made no sudden moves to take off the duo's offering of food. Not yet anyway.

"Thank you for the food, but what is going on?" Timothy intercepted Harley's response. He probably would not be respectful, and in any case, that'd not be wise.

Terra quickly responded. "We kidnapped you, brought you to a disclosed location, and plan to help institute a relationship between my Winnie and you guys. If you don't comply, we will use more harmful methods." She had confidence, which Timothy gave her credit for. "And as long as you cooperate nothing dire will happen to you." Winnie added, smiling confidently.

Harley's dark eyebrow raised as did both of Timothy's. Immediate release of thoughts filtered through her mind. She blinked, astonished. "You can't institute a relationship when the subjects are reluctant to comply or give effort." Harley sighed, looking like he deflated.

"And the fact you kidnapped them is worse." Timothy added, sliding down against the wall. Making sure her left leg was straight out to avoid injuring her knee further.

"We weren't planning to harm you, but we will in any case of reluctance." Terra said, glowering at the couple. Her dark eyes strangely alluring. No wonder her husband fell in love. She was incredible.

"What do you want exactly?"

"Winnie is in love with you. She wants a relationship. I'll be happy to oblige and give her whatever she needs/wants."

Timothy and Harley shared an uncomfortable look. She rolled her dark eyes and skewered Winnie. "Wanting a relationship huh? And yet you kidnap us. Good luck in coercing us to do the "falling in love " thing." She air quoted and leaned her head against the wall.

"We'll do what it takes." Winnie said, before the daughter-mother duo departed the room.

Few hours passed, leaving Harley and Timothy staring down at their empty trays. As soon as Winnie and Terra departed, they dug in, like they hadn't ate in moons. Timothy's stomach ached and bloated like a balloon full of helium. She couldn't help but eat every single morsel off her plate neither could Harley. He consumed the heap of food in less than five minutes and fell asleep afterwards. He woke up shortly after though.

"Why don't we pretend?" Timothy suggested promptly.

"Pretend what?"

"To fall in love with her, give her affections and into her affections. We must make her believe we are in order to be let go. We don't have to be captives for very long."

Harley considered Timothy's brilliant idea and pointed out. "Wouldn't that conspicuous? We should act reluctant and then come around. We have to succeed and if we're inconspicuous we will but not the other way around."

"We'll be reluctant for the first part, then slowly give in. We'll get out of here some how. I promise." She planted a swift kiss on his cheek and leaned on his shoulder.

"I believe you." He swallowed hard, thinking.

Winnie sat on a deep red, old sofa. Her short fingers buried in a black, fluffy pillow. She absently plucked at the furry fibers. Her thoughts were overwhelming, disturbing, and distressing. The way Timothy and Harley acted that morning flummoxed her. Why were they not surprised? Did they already suspect Winnie's plot? Or were they expecting Winnie to do something drastic either way? She knew how dramatic she can be. She knew what drastic measure she took, alot of the time she made a scene. Timothy and her husband are imperturbable. Why did they have to act complacent? And logical?

Winnie thought they may plot their own plan or something. She decided trusting them very little. She threw her pillow at the ground and got up. She rounded a corner, entering the kitchen, stepping over the threshold. Smells of spices and meat overwhelmed her. She saw a pot of chicken boiling and a skillet of stirfry cooking on the stove. Her mother leaned against an old bar. Her arms crossed, her dark eyes closed, and her face directed towards the ground naturally. She appeared sleep like, but Winnie knew that wasn't the case. Terra never slept and if she did, she liked pure quietness and alone time. Insomnia had it's claws deep into her mother. Unfortunately.

"Ma.." Winnie said, staring at her hands.

"Yeah, Winnie?"

"Do you think we'll succeed in what we're doing?"

Terra's fluttered open. Her dark eyes landed on her daughter's flushed face. She maneuvered to the skillet, not averting her eyes and picked up a tan wooden spatula. "Honestly.. It depends on how far you're willing to go and how long it takes to break them?" Terra stirred the frying pieces of green and red peppers, satiated mushrooms, and white onion.

"What if they are unbreakable?" Winnie prompted, looking warily uncomfortable. The fact Terra would be willing to break anyone for the sake of Winnie's desires was off putting, yet Terra had secrets and a closet of skeletons which explained her unique support for Winnie. She was just as dangerous if not more.

Terra switched off the burner and turned around, the skillet in her hand and sat it on the bar. She had a devious, baleful grin on her dark face. "Oh, Honey, everyone is breakable. There are people who are repeatedly broken over and over, and remain strong like your father. There are people who pretend they're not broken or breakable, but behind close doors, they break down and show the walls what someone or something else has done to them. There are people who are tough as dragon's skin and are ferocious because they have been broken. That is me. And then there is you, the person who is close to being broken but haven't. You don't let anyone. Everyone is breakable, in some way." Terra touched her daughter's cheek lovingly and met her eyes. "Timothy and Harley will endure pain and suffering til their breaking point. I have no doubt you can be the punisher. You are after all, your mother's daughter."

Winnie blinked, gazing at her mother before she turned and went back to creating the meal. Winnie left the kitchen, not wanting to engage in anymore conversation. Her mother was dark and damaged. No wonder Winnie presented the same. She walked outside, settling on a rotting wooden step, and stared into the abyss of green.

Trees surrounded the cabin, lively, and vibrant. Faint sounds of the city filtered in the air and chirping birds rung. I don't deserve their love, but I will get it. I'll do what it takes. Winnie promised herself. She heard cracking of twigs, she stood up, and saw her father and Tad carrying wood back for the fire tonight. She hoped her heart would steady. Sometimes the woods gave her slight scares. She smiled, seeing her father and Tad. "Hey guys!"

"Hey." Tad winked, his dark green eyes glittering under the weak film of sunshine. Winnie thought for a guy, who liked guys, he was probably one of the most attractive dudes ever. She walked up to him and took a couple logs off his log pile. "How was hunting for wood?" She asked, casually.

"Boring for the most part until I tripped and landed in a mud puddle by the lake. Your dad practically died of laughter. I was so mad, but I ended up laughing and throw mud at him. We had a blast." He put the logs on the triangular stack and gestured to his muddy clothes. His face looked rather pristine. Winnie assumed he used the lake water to wash off his face and hands.

"Sounds like you weren't meant for the nature thing." Winnie air quoted, chuckling at his ruin white t-shirt and yellow jeans. She had to admit the mud brought out his bronze pigmentation.

Tad shrugged, running his hand through his dirty, dark blonde hair. "Not really, but I make the best of it. How's the guests?"

"They're fine. Me and Ma talked to them and brought them food. I assume they ate. We're going to bring them dinner when Ma's finished cooking and talk to them again. Want to come?"

Tad's nonchalant expressed turned bewildered. "I don't know. That's not really my area."

"Come on, you can create more of the story if you knew their thoughts, words, and conditions? It'll be helpful in the long run."

"Fine, but you owe me!"

She rolled her eyes. "What do you want?"

"Three almond joys and starbursts!" He said cheerily, following her up the steps and into the house.

"Done and done."

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