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katebacks · 2 years
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All Mine - JJK (M)
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→ pairing | Jeon Jungkook x Reader
→ genre | smut, angst, ceo!jungkook
→ word count | 6,431
→ summary | CEO of one of the biggest companies in the country,
Jungkook didn't have much time for love. You were in love with him,
but he didn't feel the same way about you, at least that's what you thought.
→ warnings |sex, Adult content, alcoholic beverages, low slang words.
→ A/N| I've been away for a long time, but I'm slowly coming back now. I haven't come off hiatus yet, but it's a start. Please, if you like it, reblog and comment, I'm always open to suggestions.
You knew it was wrong, but it was something you couldn't avoid. From the day you laid your eyes on Jungkook, you had fallen madly in love, but always knew he didn't feel the same way and probably never would. He was cold, impatient and sometimes mean. Well, maybe most of the time he was mean, that was his nature and he made that very clear when you went on a date for the first time.
Despite being a gentleman, he wasn't romantic at all, he wasn't a man of flowers or romanticism.  He could open doors for you, he could pull out your chair for you to sit in, he could buy you gifts and expensive things, but he would never say those three words that most human beings expect to hear. And at first you were fine with that, but after a year in a relationship that was seemingly without commitments and feelings on his part, you were feeling tired. Tired of wanting him to spend the night at your apartment , tired of receiving diamond necklaces the mornings after sex as compensation for him not staying. You were tired of being treated as just an object, as something to satisfy his sexual desires, and mostly tired of him trying to control your life completely.
Jungkook was the president of a pharmaceutical company, the most successful in the country, which was on its way to winning the Academy Award for Global Entrepreneurship. So he was almost always busy, signing contracts, leading new research, traveling on business, so you only saw each other 6 times a month.  Sometimes he decided at the last minute that he would take you with him on a trip, forcing you to undo your commitments and ignore your duties for weeks, and even though you didn't have a job, since your life seemed to revolve only around him, with him paying all your expenses, including putting an apartment in your name, you attended business administration college, and you had exams and assignments that you did with your friends. That's why you always ended up getting on bad terms with your friends for missing your college dates, but you never got a bad image to the university itself, because since he started dating you, Jungkook started donating millions of dollars to your college.
But about the trips, you never complained about it. You visited Paris, Italy, Switzerland, Dubai and several other countries. During the day, you went out and got to know the city you were in, you went to the tourist spots, met new people, ate the native foods, but you always did it yourself, all alone,  because he was always busy with his business meetings, and only saw you at night, in his room.
You also had nothing to complain about the sex. It was always full of lust and madness, goosebumps and sweat. His hands went against the sensitive points of your body and your hands gripped his muscular arms. When you had your chest against the mattress, and he was on top of you, hitting you hard from behind, you would squeeze the sheet between your fingers, and he would caress your arms, bringing his hands to yours, intertwining your fingers. When you were on top, riding, the sweat pouring down your neck, strolling between your breasts, until it dripped onto Jungkook's defined abdomen, you held onto the headboard, using all your strength to do it faster and faster. As he held your waist, pressing his fingers against your skin, his eyes glued to your wet body, the moans echoing through the room, the bed creaking, he cursed as he felt himself coming, gripping your body, sitting on the bed, using the strength of his arms to keep you still on his lap, while you felt his hot liquid spurt into you, the pleasure taking over your body, and you were delirious, coming on his dick.
Then you fell down on the mattress, he pulled you into a hug until he felt that your breathing had normalized, and that your body had stopped spasming. He would get up, get his clothes and not even shower, just kiss you good night and walk out the door of your apartment, leaving you too tired to even try to stop him. And then it would take him days to respond to your messages or call you for yet another overwhelming night.
You were just tired of this bullshit.
You had enough money in the bank to support yourself for months, even years if you lowered your life quality  a little bit and stopped buying so many expensive things. And if you needed to, you had real diamond necklaces, earrings and rings that you could sell for a good price, as well as exclusive brand clothes, shoes and bags. You worked before you met him and your old boss assured you that if you wanted your job back, you would have it. There was nothing that could stop you from getting your freedom back, and meeting other people, having a loving relationship with someone else, other than the fact that you were totally heads over heels in love with Jungkook.
"So, are you coming to celebrate Minho's birthday with us tonight?" Rosé asked as you walked across campus. She was your age and in your class, she was also your best friend and shared everything with you, just like you did with her. She had a body to be envied, buttery brown, caramelized, as she liked to say. Her light pink hair shone as she walked and drew stares, compliments and sighs. She wasn't exactly the easiest person to deal with, she had the strong spirit, the strongest personality and that's why you admired her so much. As long as you had known each other, you had never seen her cry for any man, quite the contrary, it was men who cried for her. And she was the only one of your friends who knew about Jungkook.
"Yeah, I can't even remember the last time I had something with alcohol. I need to drink and go wild."
"Your Sugar Daddy won't let you drink.” She laugh.  “I highly doubt he'll let you hang out with us, anyway. Doesn't he hate you going out without him? So bossy, gosh."
"He's not my Sugar Daddy." You protested.
"Oh no? So what do we call a rich old man who pays everything for a young girl? Philanthropist? Good old man?"
"He's thirty-two. He's only fiveyears older than I am, he’s not that old.” 
Rose rolled her eyes.
"Well, he's not your boyfriend, so..."
"Anyway, we're not hanging out anymore." You shrugged. "The last time I saw him was almost two weeks ago. Since then he hasn't called or texted, and I haven't tried to get in touch either."
"Have you finally come to your senses and realized he wants nothing more than sex with you? And that he will never want to get married or have children?" She asked stopping in her tracks and grabbing your arm, causing you to stop as well. You just shook your head and nodded, a tear starting to run down your cheek, even though you fought so hard to hold it back. Rosé hugged you and stroked your back.
"I just wanted to understand why he can't love me. Am I that bad? Am I so stupid that he didn't even want to spend time with me to get to know me? Am I only good for sex?"
"Don't say those things, this guy is just another asshole in the world and he doesn't deserve you to spend your expensive foundation on him. Not even if he paid for it."
That comment made you laugh through your tears and be grateful for having Rosé by your side.
"Come on, let's pick out our clothes for tonight. Let's dress as slutty as possible, and oh, Minho has a crush on you. Maybe tonight you should use him to forget about Jungkook."
...
You were just getting dressed, wearing  a short, low-cut black satin dress, and high heels of the same color. You chose to pull your hair into a high bun, leaving your shoulders exposed.
You were just putting on your earrings when the doorbell rang. And you shivered all over. Usually, the doorman called to let you know that there was someone in the building who was asking permission to go up to your apartment, and the neighbors almost never stayed home as they were always traveling for work, so there was only one option of who was at your door.
You held yourself still, hoping that if you didn't make a noise, he would leave, but a few seconds later you heard the electronic lock being unlocked and the door opening. It was Jungkook. He always rang the doorbell first before entering the apartment so he wouldn't scare you. But still, you were scared as fuck. He never came to visit you without telling you first. Something was wrong, and you could sense it.
"Princess, are you home?" You could hear his voice coming from the living room, as you heard his footsteps in the hallway, probably heading towards your room. That was it. There was nothing to do. You simply went back to looking at yourself in the mirror, finishing putting on your earrings, remaining calm. When he entered the room, he stopped pacing suddenly, frowning at your, not expecting to find your like this.
God, how wonderful he was. He was all in black, wearing casual clothes, with his suede shoe. His brown hair tossed back, and his scent invading the room. He carried a bottle of wine, a Romanée Conti Grand Cru in one hand while his cell phone and apartment access card were in the other. You looked at him in the mirror, waiting for him to say something, but he continued to stare, relentlessly. You turned to him, his eyes falling on your shoulders and cleavage, for a few seconds he remained there, just looking at you, until he finally seemed to come to his senses and raised his gaze to yours, still frowning.
"Why are you dressed like that?" He asked in a serious tone, the kind he used when he didn't like something. You looked at yourself for a few seconds before turning your attention to him.
"Why? Isn't it good?"
"You look absolutely gorgeous." He exclaimed without hesitation, bringing a stupid smile to your face."Did we have anything scheduled today?" Jungkook looked at his rolex, trying to remember if he had forgotten any appointments he had made with you that night.
"Hmm, no." You said, still unsure what to say. Jungkook raised his head, again looking towards you with a frown. You bit your lip and turned back to the dressing table behind you, opening your jewelry drawer and looking for a necklace. "I'm going out with some friends today." And so you chose one that had only one cut diamond pendant in the shape of a heart. Jungkook had given it to you for your birthday, two months after you started hanging out.
“What friends?” You didn't even have the courage to look at his reflection in your mirror as you heard his voice getting angrier. But you couldn't understand why. He'd said himself that there was nothing between you, so why did he seem so upset?
“Some college friends. It's one of our classmates' birthday today and Rosé invited me to go with them to a pub downtown.” And that was it, you were ready to leave.
"Okay." he almost whispered. "And why didn't you tell me?" He asked putting the wine bottle on top of the dresser that was next to the door, and shoved his hands in his pants pockets. You shrugged and turned to him, who still had that confused, troubled expression on his face.
"You didn't call or text, you just... disappeared for almost two weeks, I thought you'd finally found a new sex toy and had forgotten about me. I was just moving on."
And so you walked past him, heading to the closet and looking for something. Jungkook blinked a few times until he finally understood what was happening and turned towards you, who was wearing your jacket.
"Is there something you want to tell me, (y/n)?" He never calls you by your name, only when you were in a fight or about to get into one. And you didn't feel like fighting at all, because you knew that every time, you ended up in bed, and he ended up leaving, as usual. You just sighed, fighting the urge to start cursing and jumping into his arms, and just grabbed your keys and your cell phone off the nightstand next to your bed. When you turned to him again, he remained motionless.
"I don't have anything to talk to you about, Jungkook. Like you said, we're just two adults having no-strings-attached sex, I don't owe you any explanations.” You didn't even know where you got so much strength to say that. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going out with my friends. If you want to stay, make yourself at home, if not, don't forget to lock the door when you leave."
When you walked out the apartment door, you felt like you could finally breathe again. You weren't afraid of Jungkook's reaction, you knew he would never do anything violent or dangerous to you, but you knew he was quite possessive of his stuff, and you knew he thought you was his. And to be honest, you knew you were his, you felt like his, but that had to change, you had to get over it. You wanted a family, children someday, and you knew he didn't want something like that. He wasn't the right man for you.
It didn't take long for your taxi to arrive, and by the time you boarded, Jungkook still hadn't left the building. Maybe he would stay there a little longer, maybe he would wait for you to come back. But you would try not to worry about it.
When you arrived at the pub, Rosé was outside, waiting for you to arrive. You had already been to that place once, Jungkook was the one who took you and there you’d stayed in the VIP area. It was quite an experience counting that you had sex in one of the bathrooms.
“Ready to forget that asshole?”
No, you weren’t
“Yeah, I am.”
But you could pretend it.
...
The night was moving really slowly, you had like three or four drinks, and had a bunch of strangers hitting on you like they know you. The songs were good and you even danced some with Rosé, but it was weird to be in a place like this without Jungkook shielding you from the others. You always felt safe when he was close to you, but even with your male college friends hanging around, you couldn't let go, for fear that one of those weird guys that was hitting on you might decide to do something. Being a woman wasn't easy, but being a woman in the middle of a pub full of drunk men and possible predators was even harder. And you hated it. You hated misogyny in society, you hated feeling like a targed, and you hated feeling so dependent on Jungkook.
"Is everything alright?" Minho's voice sounded close to your ear, making you look over your shoulder and see him standing right next to you. He was a tall, handsome man with black hair and an athlete's physique, he was polite and kind, and he loved children. He would be your perfect match if there wasn't an asshole on your mind.
“Yeah, I’m just tired.”  You smiled. “So? Having fun?”
"Oh, I don't know. Sometimes I think I've lost the ability to have fun at parties that start after 8 pm." He said scratching the back of his neck. "I guess I'm too old for these things."
"Don't say that, you must be tired of studying and working so hard." You said taking a sip of your drink.
"But what about you? You don't seem to be enjoying yourself either." He sat on the bench next to you, turning to face you, his arm resting on the counter, very, very close to you, so close that his hand almost touched yours that that covered the glass on the counter, preventing anyone from trying to put something in your drink.
"No, I'm having fun." You lied. "I'm just really tired, it's been a long week."
"Well, yeah, Rosé said you've been pretty busy with some personal projects. And to be honest, I've always been really curious about what those projects were, or if you were actually just dating someone and didn't want anyone to know." He gave a wan smile. "But she assured me that you didn't have a boyfriend and that you were actually looking for one."
You laughed humorlessly. Rosé, i’ll kill you. You thought.
"It's like her to say something like that."
"Look, I'll be really straight, I know we're not that close, we are both always busy and we hardly see each other at university, but you know, I kind of have a crush on you, and by crush I mean I'm dying to be more than your friend." You felt your cheeks burn, but couldn't stop staring into his eyes, which gave him enough confidence to go on. "And if you give me a chance, I think I could make a great boyfriend. Not that I'm saying we're going to start dating right on the first date." He chuckled sheepishly, and you thought that was so cute that you couldn't contain a shy laugh either. "I'm really bad at these things, sorry, I'm not very good at hitting on a girl." He cleared his throat, glancing around. "Anyway, I think we should dance, to see if this embarrassing moment can be broken."
"That would be a good idea, but I kind of don't like dancing around all these people, there are a lot of men here and I don't like the idea of a strange man trying to rub himself against me.”
"They are not going to touch you." He said smiling, reaching out to you. "I won’t let them." You bit your lip, thinking for a second. You needed to take a chance on whatever it was, only then would you be able to forget Jungkook. Or at least begin to try.
You smiled and nodded, reaching your hand towards him, but before you could even bring your fingers into Minho's palm, a huge male hand wrapped around yours, making you turn around to see who it was, your eyes widening when you saw Jungkook looking down to you. And what surprised you the most at that moment was not the fact that he was there, but the soft look he had.
"Forgive my tardiness, princess." He said smiling, bringing his face closer to yours and giving you a kiss on the forehead, leaving you even more in shock. "Kyle and I got stuck in a huge traffic jam." Kyle, the man almost as tall as Jungkook, dark-haired, dressed in a suit, who was standing two steps behind him, was his private security, his bodyguard. There was nowhere Jungkook went that Kyle wasn't together, except of course, your apartment. You didn't talk much, usually he was very quiet, and polite, he greeted you and that was it, he was silent for the rest of the time.
“You must be the birthday boy, I suppose. I hope I got here before you blew out the candles.” He turned to Minho who had a confused look and still had his hand extended towards you. If it had been on other occasions, you would have caught the sarcasm in Jungkook's words, but at that moment, you were still trying to process that he was still holding your hand.
On the other hand, Minho seems to have understood very well what he meant.
“(y/n), there you are... Oh my god what is the steel giant doing here?” Rosé came out of the crowd that was occupying the dance floor, and just like you, she widened her eyes when she saw him.
"I'm sorry, but who are you?" Minho asked, putting his hand down. A smile appeared on Jungkook's face as the sparkle in Minho's eyes faded.
"I'm Jeon Jungkook, (y/n)'s boyfriend." He simply said. The two girls looked at each other, still wide-eyed, mouths agape, while hissing ‘oh my god’ without making a single sound.
"Wow, you really do have a boyfriend." Minho laughed dryly. "I don't... I thought... Rosé told me you didn't have anyone... I didn't want to... You should have told me." 
You just wanted to curl up and hide from all that embarrassment. You didn't even know you had a boyfriend, how could you tell others that you had one?
“No, no, no, she doesn’t have a boyfriend, he’s lying.” Rosé intervened, making everyone look at her. Even Jungkook frowned at her. "If she had a boyfriend, she would have said it, wouldn't you (y/n)?" 
You wanted to say something, but you didn't know what. Luckily, Jungkook always had an answer for everything and saved you the shame of making up a blatant lie.
“We kept our relationship a secret for some time, I didn't want her to be disturbed by onlookers or reporters. I didn't want our personal lives to end up on the cover of a magazine.”
“What, you’re like famous or something?” Rosé questioned, crossing her arms in a very arrogant and petulant way.
"I'm just Hanmi's CEO."
"You mean the Hanmi Enterprise?" Minho asked totally shocked. Jungkook nodded. "Like, the biggest pharmaceutical company in the country?"
“Yes.”
"Oh my god sir, I swear I didn't know (y/n) was your girlfriend, I would never do anything...” And he started freaking out. “My god, the Hanmi Enterprise is every business administration student's dream in this country, the internship project that you have is just amazing."
Rosé rolled her eyes and grabbed your hand.
"While you guys sit there sucking each other's balls, (y/n) and I are going to the bathroom."
And she started pulling you towards the bathrooms. The moment you were inside, she turned towards you and slapped your arm.
“Ouch. Why did you do that?”
“Why did i...What the hell were you thinking of calling the Iceman, Olaff's creator, to come here?”
“How many drinks did you have? Elza is the creator of Olaff, not the... Ouch, stop hitting me.” 
"If you didn't invite him, then how the hell did he... Oh my lord. " And she covered her mouth, her eyes widening. "Do you think he implanted a mini tracker in you while you slept?"
“He didn’t do that, Rosé.”
"So he's tracking your phone, what a freak."
"He doesn't..." You took a deep breath. "Rosé, he's a partner at this nightclub. I've come here other times with him, one of his friends must have called and said I was here."
"Why didn't you tell me that when we arrived? I could have chosen another place."
"I didn't know he would come after me, at least not after the short conversation we had before I came here."
"What conversation?" She asked stopping to go around in circles. "I thought you guys weren't talking."
"And we weren't, but today he showed up at my apartment by surprise, all…perfect, holding a very expensive bottle of wine. I said I was going out with some friends, he asked why I didn't tell him, I said I didn't owe him an explanation, and I left."
"Oh, so I know exactly what's going on here, he's trying to show that he's the alpha male, and that you can even say you don't owe him an explanation, but still, you belong to him."
"Well maybe I do."
"I can't believe you're saying this." She said, in disbelief. "Have you forgotten how he's been treating you all this time?"
"Look Rosé, he never promised me roses and hearts, I always knew he didn't want a serious relationship, but you saw what he just did, he declared in front of other people that he's my boyfriend. That has to be worth something." You said throwing your hands up. "I think perhaps I should give him one more chance."
The girl was thoughtful for a few seconds, until a smile that you knew well appeared on her lips.
“I know this face, what are you up to?”
“I thought of a great way to test your Sugar Daddy.” And so she walked towards the door, while you rolled your eyes and followed.
"He's not my sugar daddy." And when they opened the door, they both came face to face with Kyle, the bodyguard, who was standing in front of them. “Kyle, what are you doing here?”
"What do you think? The old man told him to come after you. So controlling.” Rosé complained.
“Mr Jeon asked to let you know that he and your friends are in the VIP area, and that he is waiting for you there.” Kyle said simply. Rosé just sighed and headed in a direction opposite to the VIP area. “Is your friend all right, Miss (y/l/n)? Need something?"
"No, she's fine, you get used to it with time."
After climbing the stairs that led to the VIP area, (y/n) noticed that the two sofas were almost full, there was only one vacant seat, on a loveseat sofa and was right next to Jungkook. He was engaged in conversation with the other guys, and they were probably talking about politics and his company. Deciding you should drink some more, to process everything that was going on, you headed to the drinks counter and sat there, ordering a margherita for the waiter.
It didn't take long before a hand went to your waist and Jungkook sat down beside you.
"So... Steel giant, huh?"
(y/n) looked at him for a few seconds before taking a sip of her drink.
"Don't think about it too much, Rosé is 5.25ft tall, anyone is a giant for her."
"She doesn't seem to like me very much, you must have spoken very badly about me." He said nodding to the bartender that already knew what his drink would be.
“I only told the truth. It's not my fault if you're the bad guy.”
"I'm not the bad guy, only when you ask me to be." He whispered the last part. At other times it would turn you on, but at that moment, you weren't in the mood for it. Then you swiveled around on the bench, facing him.
“Look, why are you here anyway?” You asked. “Why did you come to tell my friends that you're my boyfriend when you really aren't? Have you come to show that you own me?”
“To be honest, it made me jealous to death that you could be getting hooked up with other men, and that possibly at one time or another, you would fall for one of them.” He said staring at Minho while he was talking to his friends. “And I could have sworn you were falling for that guy.”
“And what do you have to do with it, Jungkook? It was you who said that..."
"I know what I said, princess, and I was wrong."
And he made you gawk.
“Were you?”
"Yeah." He nodded. "Look, I'm not good at this, and I'm trying to change my behavior with you because you deserve so much more than a guy like me and I want to be someone who deserves you." He sighed. “Today I received the best news I could receive in the business world. And the first thing I thought of was you, I thought how much I wanted to share this news with you and how important you are to me. So I went to your apartment with that wine. I thought it was about time I had a conversation with you about my feelings, about why I was so…cold.”
"Well, you can tell me now." You said still not believing what you had heard.
“No, it's a conversation we should have alone. And I don't want to stop you from having fun with your friends. In fact, I just want you to know that I don't think of you as a toy, I know my actions so far just said that, but I swear that's not how I feel about you." He said getting up and approaching you, hovering over you, holding your face. "I just wanted you to know that..."
"(y/n)!" Rosé's voice caught your attention, and you turned to the side, seeing your friend running towards you. “Come with me, now!” And so she grabbed your arm, taking it from Jungkook's hands, who just sighed and sat down again, watching you walk down the stairs until you lost sight of you.
"What's it?" you asked, your voice not loud enough to override the loud music in the room. You were being pulled into the crowd, on the dance floor in the common part of the Pub.
“You will dance with me. Our special Have Mercy choreography.”
"What? What are you...”
“I'm going to prove to you that Jungkook doesn't deserve a second chance, that he's controlling and that the moment he sees you dancing sensually among this bunch of guys, he's going to drag you out of here. Because that's what shit men do, they fuck women up, he takes away your freedom and ends your life. Trust me."
"Rosé, he's not like that."
"Oh no? Then dance with me and prove me wrong."
When CHLOE's voice invaded the place, Rosé started dancing the 'special choreography' they had created in their freshman year of college, when they met and became best friends. It was something sensual and provocative, and one that would surely attract the attention of both sexes there. Praying that no strangers would try to grope you, you started dancing with your friend.  
You weren't the best dancer in the world, but you always liked to dance, it made you elastic and it was a great exercise for people who, like you, didn't like working out. Rosé had a lot more waddle, she could wiggle her hips a lot better, and she created all the choreography. And if she didn't like what she studied in college so much, she'd probably be a dancer.
And the highlight of the choreography, in your opinion, was when you wiggled your ass, keeping your legs straight and lowered your torso, touching your fingertips to the floor, and then you went up at once, throwing your hair back, and lowered yourselves. at once, as if you were actually going to sit down.
“(y/n) and Rosé are killing it.” One of the friends from the university who was in the VIP area said, making the others look over the railing, to the dance floor below, seeing the two swaying among the other people, attracting several looks.Jungkook approached the protection bar, holding a glass of whiskey and watched you, who tossed your hair, went down and up, made provocative movements and was attracting a lot of attention.
He looked at Kyle who got the message and just waved his hand, calling out to the other security guards who followed the boss to the common area dance floor.
Jungkook looked around, seeing the amount of men who were watching you too.
“Bunch of pervs. Kyle" He called, not taking his eyes off his girl.
“Sir?”
"Don't let any man touch her."
"Yes sir." And so Kyle led the security guards who, one by one, barred any man from approaching the two girls in the middle of the dance floor who with your dance, now infected other girls who danced sensually around them. Jungkook started walking in circles, slowly, around the girls, eyes glued to you. In his mind, several scenarios were happening, several memories were reproduced and the fire that burned in his chest, only seemed to burn with even more intensity.
When herealize that a man managed to avoid the security guards and enter the circle, and that he had his eyes and even his hands raised towards you, Jungkook quickened his pace, slipping between you and the boy, looking him up and down, his gaze cold and intimidating, not needing anything else for the boy to back off.
At the end of the song, you and Rosé celebrated and only then looked around, seeing that the security guards had made a kind of barrier, leaving the men out and the women in. You both looked towards Jungkook who was beside Kyle, looking at you with a smug smile on his face as he shoved his hands into his pants pockets. You can't help but smile.
"I told you." You turned to your friend who looked nothing less than impressed.
"He literally pushed every man in this pub away from you, just to let you dance." She laughed. "Yeah, that's pretty cool."
You walked towards him and let him hug you by the waist.
"Do I need to do anything else to prove how important you and your happiness are to me?" You looked around, biting your lip, trying to think of something. The whole situation, the dancing, the display of power, made you aroused and you could feel that you were wet, so when you saw what you wanted, you turned to him and leaned on his shoulders, bringing your lips to his ear.
"I want you to fuck me on those tables over there." You said pointing to the darkest corner of the pub, where literally no one was sitting, as they were more interested in dancing and getting high than sitting. Jeon let out a groan and tightened his hands on your waist, starting to push you towards the tables, he never backed down on a challenge and was always willing to fuck anywhere you were comfortable with.
Minutes later, you were at one of those tables both in the dark. You were kneeling on the floor under the table. He had his pants open and his cock was in your hand. You moved your soft hand over him as your mouth sucked on the top, making Jungkook grunt and grab your hair, moving your head according to the pleasure he was feeling. And with every movement you made with your tongue, he pushed your head harder until you swallowed his whole dick, being able to feel the bottom of your throat, moving his hips against your mouth, fucking your throat until you are out of breath and patting his thigh, making him let go, watching the saliva run from your mouth to the middle of your breasts, making him even harder with that sight.
He cursed - his words were not heard because of the loud music. He reached into his pocket, pulling out a condom. He ripped the package open with his teeth as you stood up and had your back to him. As soon as he put a condom on his cock, he grabbed your waist and pulled you onto his lap,pulled your panties to the side and let him position his cock at the entrance to your dripping pussy. You slowly sat up until you were full of him, your walls getting used to the size he was. You spread your hands across the table, slowly moving your hips back and forth. Jungkook threw his head back, hitting the club wall, cursing as you slowly rolled on his lap, lust taking over his body, totally at your mercy. He used to be the dominator in bed, but he would never lie about the fact that if you asked, he'd drop to his knees for you, his princess. He got so weak when you moved like that.  He cupped your waist, pressing his fingers into your skin, in an almost silent request for you to move faster, and you did, riding his cock with ease.
And between moans and curses your chest was against the table, Jungkook was standing behind you, one hand resting on your back while the other held your waist, hitting hard from behind. His grunts and groans of pleasure were totally masked by the electronic music that was now blaring from the speakers. No one there had noticed the madness they were committing, and if they did, no one cared. His cock hitting the right place, making you roll your eyes and grab the edge of the table while you bit your own lips, feeling your pussy tighten around him, your core so hot and so tight, it hurt.
"Fuck." You grunted as you felt orgasm reaching your body, as he increased the force of the blows, now pulling your arms, making you stand, your ass lifted against his hip, one of his arms hugging your waist, while with the other hand he grabbed your throat. He bit down on your shoulder, sucking on your skin as he slammed his cock against your pussy. “Fucking hell, fuck.” He hissed as he came. His cum filling the condom and he in the midst of his delirium of pleasure, he wished he was filling your pussy with his cum, imagining how pleasurable it would be to see his cum running down your legs after he filled you.
He collapsed sitting on the seat, taking the condom off his dick and zipping his pants while you adjusted the dress and hair. He pulled you onto his lap, sitting you sideways on his thighs and hugging you, letting you lay your head on his shoulder, closing your eyes and resting.
"We should go home." He whispered to you, who just nodded, too tired to speak. He then got up with you on his lap, carrying you out of the club, and to the car, where Kyle took them to your apartment.
And for the first time, Jungkook slept with you in your bed.
all rights reserved © katebacks | 2018/2022 — no reposting and/or modifying of any form on any medium is allowed. no translations allowed.
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beomgyus · 11 months
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JEONGHAN Super, 230427
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yjbglove · 10 months
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20230611 TXT - Invitation ​​​​
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secndlife · 8 months
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pairing: mingyu x female reader genre: kinda fluff but also kinda angst? they're just really bad communicators summary: people must ask each other a set of uncomfortable questions. they can either answer, or take a shot. word count: 2.3k warnings: mentions of unprotected sex, alcohol consumption series masterlist
mingyu: nervous?
you: hmm
you: maybe?
you: this feels kinda weird
mingyu: why?
you: i don’t know
you: i think we avoid these types of talks to be honest
you: and now we’re here to do it in front of a camera
mingyu: i just couldn’t say no to eunwoo okay?
mingyu: it’s for his internship
producer: oh, so you’re eunwoo’s friend?
mingyu: yeah
produce: nice!
producer: everyone loves him around here
mingyu: yeah, he's great
mingyu: can you make sure to get my good side?
producer:
mingyu: also, is the camera positioned correctly?
mingyu: i'm a visual arts major, so i know a thing or two about it
producer:
you: mingyu.
mingyu: what?
you: stop it.
mingyu: i was just asking a question!
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producer: now that we all know your names, can you explain a little about your dynamic?
mingyu:
you:
mingyu:
you: uhhh
you: we’re—
mingyu: friends?
mingyu: with benefits.
you: i think that’s. uh. 
you: yeah, the best way to describe it
mingyu: right
you: friends with benefits
producer: right.
producer: and how long have you two been friends for?
you: with benefits?
mingyu: or do you mean regular friends?
producer: both?
you: we met early freshman year
you: and we’re juniors now
mingyu: but the benefits part started in august
you: yeah so it’s been about 3 months
producer: hmm okay
producer: did it start while you were drunk and horny?
mingyu: that’s funny
mingyu: close but no
you: high and horny
producer: second most common answer for college fuck buddies
producer: fair enough
producer: well! let’s get this party started then
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mingyu: ladies first?
you: uh, actually—
mingyu: want me to go first?
you: please?
you: thank you
mingyu: anything for you
producer:
you:
mingyu: so
mingyu: what are the terms of this relationship?
you: wow
you: uh. 
you: i don’t think we’ve ever. seriously talked about it?
mingyu: yeah i think we haven’t
you: why are you looking at us like that?
producer: everyone knows you need to talk about it
producer: like, before it even starts
you: 
mingyu:
you: i don’t think we’re very good at talking about it
producer: i can see that
mingyu: i mean
mingyu: of course that there are some basic things
you:
mingyu: like we still need to be friends
you:
mingyu: and we need to be comfortable at all times
you:
mingyu: and that everything is uncomplicated
you:
mingyu: and no expectations or pressure
producer:
mingyu: and. and!
mingyu: 
you:
producer:
mingyu: that’s kind of all i’ve got…
producer: maybe you can talk about it now?
you: no
mingyu: no
you: shots?
mingyu: hell yeah
producer: oh god
producer: we’re not gonna get anything from them, are we?
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mingyu: are you calmer now?
you: not really, but it’s okay
mingyu: sure?
you: yeah
mingyu: okay
you: my turn
you: oof
you: i don’t think i wanna ask this
mingyu: oh c’mon
mingyu: it can’t be that bad
you:
you: fine.
you: are you afraid of commitment?
mingyu: pfffff!
you: why are you rolling your eyes?
mingyu: of course i’m not afraid of commitment!
you: okay?
mingyu: do you think i’m afraid of commitment???
you: uh
you: no?
mingyu: i’m not!!!
you: okay! then you’re not!
mingyu: then i’m not!
producer: wow
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mingyu: i really am not afraid of commitment
you: can you please just take a card?
mingyu: fine.
mingyu: oh! i know the answer to this one
you:
mingyu: have you slept with someone else since we’ve been sleeping with each other?
you: hmm!
you: what’s my answer, then?
mingyu: no you haven’t
you: why do you sound so confident?
mingyu: because i know you
you: 
you: you can be so full of yourself sometimes
you: do not wink at me
mingyu: 
you: why did you wink?
mingyu: because i know you like it
you: god.
mingyu: thank you
mingyu: anyway
mingyu: am i wrong?
you:
mingyu: did you sleep with someone else?
you: not since we started. you know.
mingyu: not using protection?
you: don’t say that out loud!
you: people are gonna think we’re irresponsible
mingyu: aren’t we?
you: 
you: okay but!
you: we get tested every month
you: and! we don’t sleep with anyone else!
you: and! i have an IUD!
mingyu: so i was right
mingyu: you haven’t slept with anyone else
you: urgh.
you: fine, yes
you: as in no, i haven’t slept with anyone else
mingyu: nice
mingyu: and just so it’s clear, i haven’t either
you: good
you: i wouldn’t really like that
mingyu:
you:
mingyu:
you: i mean!
you: considering we are irresponsible and don’t use protection anymore! 
mingyu: right!
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you: do we still have a lot of questions left?
producer: i think like, five?
you: oof. okay
mingyu: you can do this!
mingyu: i believe in you!
you: haha
you: okay
mingyu: what’s with the face?
you: i don’t wanna ask this one either
mingyu: oh my god 
mingyu: what now?
you: name my 3 worst traits
mingyu: that’s—
you: i just don’t wanna know
mingyu:
you:
mingyu: i can drink if you want 
mingyu: then i don’t have to answer, and you don’t have to know
you: you’d do that?
mingyu: yep
you:
you: okay then
you: thank you
mingyu: you’re welcome
mingyu: that kind of burned
you: weak
mingyu: hey!
mingyu: i did this for you!
you: i’m just kidding
you: stop pouting!
mingyu: but just for the record—
you: why does it feel like you're about to answer?
mingyu: i like basically everything about you 
you:
mingyu:
you:
mingyu: hehe.
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mingyu: ohhhhh, this one is great
mingyu: i love this question
you: what is it?
mingyu: other than being great in bed, what are my other positive qualities?
you: of course you love this question
mingyu: don’t look at me like that
mingyu: am i not allowed to enjoy being praised?
you: i mean you are
you: you just physically can’t take it
mingyu: i don’t know what you mean
you: the moment i start answering this, your ears are gonna turn red
mingyu: no they won’t!
you: they will 
you: but it’s cute
mingyu: wait.
mingyu: uh.
mingyu: maybe you can drink for this one?
you: absolutely not
mingyu: but i drank for you!
you: and that was cute
you: but i am answering
you: people need to see that i was right and that your ears will turn red
mingyu:
you: so
you: you’re just generally really nice?
you: like, you do things for everyone, and you don’t really ask for anything back
mingyu: hm
you: you’re also funny
you: and very caring
you: and you’re also pretty smart?
producer: oh my god
producer: his ears are super red
mingyu: they’re not!
you: stop covering them! the people need to see it
mingyu: they’re not red! 
you: they’re soooooo red
mingyu: stop ittttt
you: aw you look so cute
producer: they keep on getting red 
producer: this is kinda funny
you: it is, right?
you: but yeah, that’s it
mingyu:
you: you’re a nice guy
mingyu: i—
mingyu: wow.
you: yeah
mingyu: do you. like. really mean that?
you: of course i do!
you: we’ve been friends for a while now
you: and i wouldn’t do that nor the benefits part if you were an asshole
mingyu: right
you: right
mingyu: thank you
producer: did you just whisper something, mingyu?
producer: i think the mic didn’t pick up on it
mingyu: nope
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you: that was fun
mingyu: no it wasn’t
you: awwww, poor thing
mingyu: let go of my cheeeeeks
you: hehe
you: okay the card
mingyu: go on
you: what’s the expiration date of our relationship?
you: damn
mingyu: yeah
mingyu: should i—
you: drink? 
you: nah, you can answer if you want to
mingyu: oh. okay…
mingyu: i mean. i think there’s no exact expiration date?
you: 
mingyu: as long as we’re both enjoying it…
mingyu: i-i don’t think we plan on stopping it?
you:
mingyu:
you: oh, you want me to—
mingyu: yeah…
you: yeah, i mean. i agree
you: i’d say if anyone gets uncomfortable or wants to call it quits?
mingyu: that!
producer: what about feelings?
mingyu: what about them?
producer: what if someone develops feelings here?
you:
mingyu:
producer: feelings would make it complicated, no?
you:
mingyu:
you: i mean.
mingyu: i guess?
producer: would that end it?
you:
mingyu:
you:
mingyu: m-maybe?
mingyu: i don’t know?
you:
mingyu:
you: can we drink?
you: i told you we’re not good at talking about things
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you: okay 
you: you go
mingyu: right
mingyu:
mingyu:
you: what?
mingyu: okay, i’m gonna ask you something
you: yeah?
you: that’s the purpose of this game
mingyu: no i mean. not the question
you: i’m not following
mingyu: can you drink to this one?
you:
you: wow, you sound very serious
mingyu: i. uh. kind of am
you: oh! uh. 
mingyu: please? 
you:
you: yeah sure
mingyu: okay
producer: hey!
producer: that’s cheating!
mingyu: i’m friends with eunwoo, please let me have this
producer: haha.
mingyu:
producer: fine
mingyu: phew.
mingyu: okay so the card
mingyu: why can’t i be your significant other?
you:
mingyu:
you: oh.
you: you don’t want me to an—
mingyu: not really?
you:
you: okay
mingyu:
you: tequila here i come?
mingyu: i’ll drink with you
you: nice
mingyu: cheers baby
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producer: i think we’re almost done
you: finally
producer:
mingyu:
you: don’t get me wrong! this was kinda fun
you: but also just.
mingyu: a lot
you: yeah
producer: sorry, this isn’t a great game for emotionally constipated people
you:
mingyu: what?
producer: i’m sorry! but. you know?
you: i get it
mingyu: i don’t get it
mingyu: what’s that supposed to mean?
you: i’ll tell you later
mingyu: did he mean—
you: mingyu.
mingyu: but—
you: shhhh
you: just let me take a card
mingyu:
mingyu: fine
you: oh. this will be interesting
you: on the count of 3, name who likes who more in this relationship
mingyu: oh!
mingyu: i mean. i know the answer
you:
mingyu:
you: what?
mingyu: what what?
you: what do you mean you know the answer?
mingyu: who’s gonna count?
producer: i will!
you: oh god
producer: 3
you: oh god!
producer: 2
you: you ready?
producer: 1
mingyu: you
you: it’s equal
mingyu:
you:
mingyu:
you: oh my god.
you: wow that’s so—
producer: oof.
mingyu: no, wait.
you: this is so embarrassing.
mingyu: no! i mean!
you: i need a fucking shot
mingyu: i didn’t—
you: it’s fine
you: just pour me a shot please
mingyu: baby—
you: mingyu. it’s fine
you: the tequila please
mingyu: do you want me to—
you: nope, i’ll drink it alone
produce: damn…
you: can we move on please?
mingyu: fuck.
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mingyu: last question
you: honestly i’m glad this is over
mingyu: yikes
mingyu: i thought this was gonna be fun!
you: yeah. i mean.
you:
mingyu:
you: yeah. 
producer: didn’t you have at least a little bit of fun?
you: i do like free tequila
mingyu: see!
you: still.
you: just. take the last card please
mingyu: yes ma’am
you:
mingyu: oooohhhhh…
you: oh god
mingyu: this is. definitely something.
you: 
mingyu: 
you: can i drink before he even asks?
producer: no!
you: please?
producer: absolutely not
producer: please don’t ruin this even further
you:
mingyu:
you: just. just read it
mingyu: uh. 
mingyu: okay.
mingyu: could you see yourself falling in love with me?
you: jesus christ!
you: wow.
mingyu: yeah
you: i am absolutely not answering that
mingyu: i mean.
mingyu: it’s up to you
you:
mingyu:
you: wait. do you. uh.
you: do you want me to answer that?
mingyu:
you:
mingyu: m-maybe?
you: 
producer: oh shit
you:
mingyu:
you: mingyu, i—
mingyu: you don’t have to!
you: i, uh. really. 
you: i don’t know.
mingyu: then take a shot!
you:
mingyu: it’s okay!
you:
mingyu: i mean it.
you:
mingyu:
you: i—
mingyu: baby. just take the shot.
you: i don’t know?
mingyu: take the—
you: like, i’ve never really fallen in love with anyone?
mingyu: oh.
producer: oh?
you: i don’t really know what that’s like?
mingyu: not even with—
you: nope.
mingyu: right
you: so i don’t. i don’t know if i can do it with you
you: if that makes sense
mingyu: i get it
you: and i don’t think falling in love is part of the deal anyway so
mingyu: oh
mingyu: of course! 
you:
mingyu: totally!
you: yeah.
producer: she’s such a liar
you: what did you say?
producer: oh! nothing
you:
mingyu:
producer:
you: can i still take the shot?
producer: sure, why not
you: please don’t think i drink too much
you: i’m just. emotionally constipated
producer: they’ll understand, don’t worry
mingyu: what does that even mean???
you: don’t worry about it
producer: what about you, mingyu?
you: please don’t
mingyu: what about me?
producer: could you see yourself falling in love with her?
you: oh god.
mingyu:
you:
mingyu: oh!
you: mingyu.
mingyu: hmmm.......
you:
mingyu: do i have to—
you: no you don't!
producer: i mean.
producer: would be nice.
mingyu: i mean.
mingyu: i just think it can get awkward if i do?
producer: if you do what?
mingyu: answer it
you: oh.
producer: so you can't see it?
mingyu: what????
mingyu: i didn't say that????
you: can we just. stop this???
mingyu: it's complicated, that's all
you: please just stop talking
mingyu: i mean. you're amazing...
mingyu: it's just that—
you: i really. really. don't wanna know
mingyu: m-maybe?
producer:
you:
mingyu: i don't know, okay?
mingyu: god i feel like my ears are burning up
you:
mingyu: oh can you pour me a shot as well?
you: yeah
mingyu:
you:
producer:
mingyu:
you:
producer: well...
producer: it's a wrap?
you: thank god
you: can we go, please?
mingyu: yeah
mingyu: are you. uh. are you coming over?
you:
mingyu:
you: ... yeah
producer:
producer: i've never seen such a dense group of people do this
you: uh.
mingyu: thanks? i guess?
you: i don't think he meant it as a compliment, mingyu
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a/n: well hello???? i haven't written anything (especially something that's not soonyoung) in sooooooo long omg i barely know how to format a post anymore bc it all looks different omg. anyway!! hi!!!!! it's been ages i'm sorry. this belongs to that one fwb college jock mingyu universe that's been a wip for literally. 3 years. yes i checked today when i first created the google doc for that. and i've also been kind of away from seventeen for some time But since yesterday my carat skin has been activated and also my mingyuner skin so here i am. with this. i hope you'll like it!!!! this is absolutely unhinged in terms of posting bc this was not edited, was written in a Questionable state of mind and was not betaed. let's see if i'll regret in the morning. mwah mwah love you all!! and my askbox is always open hehehe
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nakakitayumas · 9 months
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YUMA of &TEAM, 230625
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min-youngis · 2 years
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Say My Name - j.jh
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Jeong Jaehyun x Reader
Fluff, Suggestive, Angst, Humour; NC-17; 12.1k words
Bodyguard x Princess, Royalty AU
Swearing, Alcohol Mention, Implied Spicy Times, Anxiety Mentions, Medium-to-Fast Burn, Mutual Pining, Sexual Tension, Jealousy Jealousy, Sword Fighting as Foreplay
Four years at sea have trained you to survive on close to nothing, to plant your feet firmly on the deck of a ship without stumbling, to navigate a vessel through the eye of an earth-shattering storm. The eighteen years before that had taught you how to be an able princess, the darling of the kingdom, to observe without being observed, and to wheedle answers from people who did not wish to part with them. Now, with your ascension to the throne nearing, you’re learning the art of statecraft and diplomacy, war room tactics and dirty compromises with smaller rulers. But there are no lessons for what to do when your lifelong bodyguard starts looking a little too interesting.
A/N: surprise bitches, bet you thought you’d seen the last of me. pulled these titles out of my ass. cried a bit at jaehyun’s lil speech at the end.
i'd love to hear feedback, spread the love!
masterlist in my description.
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If the fly doesn’t shut up soon, you’re going to scream.
           “And you, your Highness? What do you think?”
           You abruptly school your expression into one of neutrality. The fly is probably glad to be rid of your glare, anyway. “About?” you venture, trying not to inflect too much cluelessness into your voice. The exasperated look from your father isn’t very promising.
           The General, more than used to your wandering attention, makes no outward expression of annoyance at having to repeat himself. “About the campaign. Do you see anything untoward in the agreement?”
           At the slight dip of his head, you become cognizant of the rough parchment on the table in front of you. Hurriedly, you take it in your hands and begin to speed read, keenly aware of the eyes of the rest of the state diplomatic heads on you.
           “Looks fine,” you acquiesce, not giving it too much of a thought. The war room is in the worst ventilated quarter of the castle, and you can feel the fabric of your inners sticking to the skin of your back with sweat. The fly won’t shut up. You want to get out.
           Every day has been like this for the last week, since you returned from your travels. You were given a day to recover from the four years away, to regain your land legs and get reacquainted with the King and Queen, before you were put to work. That had been the agreement. Four years outside the kingdom, to explore and travel and sail to any port in the world with your crew, to experience freedom, before being cloistered back inside the castle you had grown up in to begin your training as the heir to the throne. The sudden adjustment had been difficult enough, dealing with the rigid palace timings and having to follow all the rules again after spending years with only the sea and your own thirst for adventure to guide you, but what had made it all even more unbearable was the incessant meetings with the war council and the diplomatic advisors about state policy. Your father had thought it was important for you to be present for these, to get a feel for what your future would look like. At the moment, it doesn’t feel very fun.
           Thankfully, it only takes a few minutes to wrap up the meeting once all the council heads have given their revisions and approval. Slowly, the others filter out of the room, leaving behind you and your father. You make your way to walk out as well, standing up with a nod at the King, when he stops you.
           “You know what I’m going to say,” your father states.
           The single open window lets in a stream of sunlight that illuminates the greys in his hair, the wrinkles on his face. But his appearance belies a strength that you had grown up in awe of. There’s steel in his eyes, spine ramrod straight in his high-back chair. Impressive, but you wish there was a little less steel to be seen right about now.
           You do know what he’s going to say. How are you going to govern the country when you’re the ruler? Why don’t you pay attention in the meetings? How will the council respect you if you spend your time here zoning out? 
“Then don’t say it,” you shrug.
           He sighs, shoulders dropping just a little bit. It makes you feel just that little bit bad. “Did you listen at all?”
           “The agreement is completely unfair,” you declare, sitting back down on your seat opposite him.
           “That’s the point, Y/N. There’s always a loser in any compromise.”
           “You’re cutting off their trade route to push them to depend on us. That isn’t compromise, that’s cruelty.”
           He sternly replies, “We’re building a dam.”
           “You’re building an excuse,” you spit out. “You’re shutting off a country half our size from the mainland, forcing them to rely on us for trade, and then you’re going to impose a completely unreasonable tax on them.”
           “If they have a problem with it, they’ll get back with an agreeable alternative.”
           “They won’t risk angering us, and you know it.”
           Silence. Unconsciously, you’ve moved forward in your frustration, and you lean back in your seat, stewing. Your father stares right back at you, equally defiant.
           “Why didn’t you mention all this at the meeting?” he asks.
           “Your General is a…difficult man to talk to.” A sneer accompanies your words.
           “Our General is the reason we have one of the biggest armies in the world.”
           “And the most enemies.”
           The King only sighs in reply.
           Giving up early today, you think.
           On receiving no further response, and recognising that you’ve both reached the stalemate that you end up in nearly every day, you make to get up again. This time, you get as far as the door of the war room before you’re stopped.
           “I’m increasing the frequency of your sessions with Junmyeon.”
           You turn around on your heel, protest hot on your lips, but the warning in your father’s eyes makes you halt. Instead, you lift your neck, stubbornness in your words as you reply, “He can spend as long as he wants teaching me statecraft, but it won’t make a difference to my opinion about your general’s dirty tricks.”          
With that, not allowing yourself to be stopped again, you promptly stalk out of the room.
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“Fucking hell, it’s almost like I need to protect others from you.”
           You hold your position, sword pointed right at the middle of Jaehyun’s neck as you look down at his sprawled frame on the floor, relishing in the satisfaction of your third straight win of the day. Still panting from the round, you grin in response to his comment as you move your sword out of the way, arm extended for your opponent to stand up. He accepts your help, grabbing his own sword that you had knocked out of his grip from the floor as he lets you assist him to his feet.
           Wordlessly, the both of you make your way to the benches that line the circular practice courtyard, where your other guard, Hyejin, keeps watch. The argument with your father had left you restless, and like all previous similar instances, you had spent the evening training with the two members of your personal cohort. The balanced weight of the sword in your hand, the adrenaline from the fights and victories, and the exertion from all the physical activity had served to clear your head per usual, leaving behind only a dull soreness in your bones that you appreciate.
           Jaehyun and Hyejin have been with you for years – first as friends, only a little older than you, and children of members of the royal guard, when you were young. As the years had passed, time you had spent running around in the palace gardens and aggravating the head cook had slowly turned into them training in the guard, and you preparing for your eventual Queen-ship. On your sixteenth birthday, it was inevitable that they were announced as your official guards. You had missed them in your four years away, but the reassurance they had always provided made an easy reappearance after your return.
           “How many straight losses was that? Five?”
           Jaehyun scoffs at your goading as he rubs a cloth over his face. He’s only got on the loose, white tunic that’s worn by the guards below their uniforms, and sweaty patches on the fabric make it stick to his toned skin. It makes you savour the effort he’s had to put in to fight you. “Three. And I let you.”
           “You keep believing that,” you grin, giving his shoulder a soothing pat before you pull the coat over your own, equally sweaty tunic. “Next, you’ll tell me that you would have beaten me in the next round.”
           “I would have actually beaten you in the next round. Just to keep you humble.”
           “Humble me, then. Hyejin, do we have time for another round?”
           Your other guard doesn’t look at you from her roving gaze on the perimeter walls when she replies. “Not if you’re both going to bathe before dinner.”
           A pause.
           “Please bathe before dinner.”
           Jaehyun makes a big show of disappointment as he slides his sword into the scabbard that he’s attached to his waist, now fully attired in his proper uniform in preparation to go back into the castle. “Guess I’ll just have to teach you a lesson some other time, Your Highness,” he sighs in faux-displeasure.
           “Guess so, Jaehyun. Until then, I can be as insufferable as I want,” you smile, beginning to walk towards the palace doors and feeling the reassuring, constant motions of your guards behind you.
           Under her breath, Hyejin hums, “Is that not what you’ve been doing so far?”
           “I could choose to not bathe.”
           “And Her Majesty could choose to dismiss you from the dinner table because you’re masking the smell of the food with your scent.”          
You waggle your finger in playful warning at Hyejin behind you as you all reach closer to your room. “Don’t go around giving her any ideas, please. I have no idea what my father has already told her about today, but it can’t be very pleasant.”
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           Her Majesty, (the Queen, your mother, etcetera), would rather see you suffering and starving in bed right now than next to her on the table, you’re sure and certain.
           Her steely glare hasn’t left you since you entered the room, her eyes narrowing at your (freshly cleaned and dressed) frame the moment you had entered. It had prompted Jaehyun to mumble a quiet ‘Ouch,’ under his breath behind you, and you could hear the wince in his voice. Now, after spending nearly an entire meal faced with the full wrath of that glare, you’re inclined to agree with him.
           It’s silent in the small dining hall, the one you use when it’s just family, with only the sounds of cutlery clinking. When you finish eating, dabbing the sides of your mouth with the white cloth, you observe your parents. You wonder if you’ll be able to make it out of the room pleading a headache before they’re done with their meals, but for the second time in a day, your smooth getaway is foiled.
           “Sit,” your mother calls out, even before you make the smallest move to get up. “Wait.”
           Perseverant, you reply in a tired voice, “I’d love to talk, but it’s been such a long day. Maybe tomorrow?” You press a limp hand up to your forehead for extra measure. One of the guards lining the walls lets out a puff of air that sounds like repressed laughter. Your target audience remains unimpressed.
           The King remains a quiet onlooker as you and your mother face-off, but you notice the glint of satisfaction in his eyes when you back down. He’s staying for the show. Defeated, you lean behind in your high-back chair in a show of acquiescence. “What would you like to discuss?”
           “How have your lessons with Junmyeon been going?”
           “Fine.”
           She doesn’t respond, quietly waiting for you to elaborate.
           You sigh. “Boring. He tells me things I already know, and the things I don’t know are said in such a monotone that I don’t want to know them.”
           “Hmm. And how was the meeting today?”
           “Same as all the others. The General shows just how crooked his moral compass is, and everybody suitably recalibrates theirs at his every proclamation.”
           Silence.
           Then, “You do realise that you’re the princess? That you’re next in line to the throne?”
           At your confused expression, your mother drops the sternness. “You are the second most important person in that room. What’s stopping you from telling them what you think?”
           “They won’t listen, that’s what’s stopping me,” you huff.
           “So, make them listen,” your mother insists. “Remind them that you’re their future Queen. You aren’t gallivanting across the globe in your trousers, singing sea shanties while pulling rigs and sleeping in dingy bars with your crew anymore, Y/N. You’re training to be a ruler. When you take over the kingdom, you’re going to need people who respect you, advisors you can trust. Use these meetings to scope them out. Find a way to work with the General. And for heaven’s sake, pay more attention in your lessons.”
           You’re stunned into silence. You think your father might begin to break into applause.
           Subdued, you mumble, “I- I’ll see what I can do.”
           With that, your mother offers a firm nod before turning in her seat. “Now how was your day, darling?”
           “Just got a thousand times better,” the King replies with a wide grin on his face.          
This time, you aren’t stopped when you excuse yourself from the meal.
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           The palace walls aren’t really as high as they look. The turrets run deceptively tall when they’re seen from the ground, and the four spires seem as though they touch the sky, but when you’re actually atop the towers, it doesn’t feel that high at all. Your legs dangle over the edge of the second tallest surface in the castle, and despite your guards’ complaints, it’s not that dangerous. Not really, not when you’ve got one of the many watch balconies jutting out just a few feet below you.
           The royal family had gone to bed hours ago, but sleep had remained adamantly elusive. Then you remembered the terrace. Giving the guards stationed outside your door the slip, you had made the familiar trek, avoiding the patrolling security, and climbed up the stairs.
           There’s a nip in the air, a chill that’s so typical of this time of year, but you relish the bite of the wind against your frame. From this height, you can see beyond the palace gates, out into the expanse of the kingdom’s capital. It’s too late at night to expect the hustle and bustle of regular city life, but the lights in some households remain luminant.
           You’re confident that you’ll be able to make it back to your rooms in secrecy when you have to, but for now, you want out. Just some time alone.
           “Thought I might find you up here.”
           You don’t turn around. Unspeaking, you pat the space next to you in invitation.
           Jaehyun takes the proffered seat, his presence and the heat of his body welcome after so long in the cold. Out of the corner of your eye, you see that his hair is tousled, and the only weapon he’s carrying is a long sword tucked into the belt of his tunic that looks rumpled, hurriedly worn.
           “How did you know I was gone?”
           “The guards heard you climbing out through your balcony. You’re slipping.”
           “I’m out of practice,” you combat. The last time you had executed this escape manoeuvre, you had been twenty-four hours away from a voyage with no end destination, and possibly no return, four years ago. “I’m sorry you had to be woken up.”
           “I wasn’t asleep.”
           “Why not?”
           He doesn’t meet your eyes. Then suddenly, it hits you. The messy hair, the haphazard tunic. Is that a bruise near the side of his neck? Immediately, you backtrack. “Oh! Oh, I’m sorry you were- uh, interrupted in your…activities, I didn’t know – “
           “It’s alright,” Jaehyun chuckles at your rambling, the sound low and amused, if a bit sheepish. “This is my duty and all that.”
           You aren’t fully convinced. Wincing, you ask, “Hopefully, she understood?”
           “We aren’t courting or anything. No harm, no foul.”
           It shouldn’t be such an awkward conversation. You’ve both known each other for years, personally as friends, and professionally as heir-apparent and guard. You’re both adults. So why do you suddenly feel colder at the knowledge that Jaehyun has a life outside of you? When you had been away, he and Hyejin had been assigned patrol duty; just a few hours every day, giving them more than enough opportunity to explore their lives aside from palace work. And they don’t owe you anything when their shifts are over. What they do with their free time is none of your business.
           Maybe Jaehyun notices that you’ve suddenly gone quiet, and when he speaks again, it’s cajoling, curious, and conspicuously a different topic. “Why couldn’t you sleep?”
           “It’s weird.” You keep your eyes fixed on the horizon. “I came back thinking I was ready to start training, but I feel so…out of place. The rules, the routine. It’s like I’ve forgotten how to live with a schedule. How to be a next-in-line.”
           “You seem to be doing fine, all things considered.”
           The small laugh bubbles out of you. “That’s awfully optimistic of you.”
           “No, I’m serious!” Jaehyun twists slightly, making you shift your gaze from the dark blue sky to his earnest face as he continues. “In one week, you’ve managed to cause more upheaval in that war room than there’s been in the last year. They aren’t indifferent to you - they’re just trying to get things done quicker now because they know that you’ll make changes when you take over.”
           You don’t want to believe it, but you trust his judgement and opinion, and you aren’t keen on starting a debate at the moment. “And the first person to go will be that dratted General.”
           “You’ll be fine. It’s been a while, but you’ll get used to the palace again. Only a matter of time.”
           You recognise the wisdom in his words, letting out a small sigh. Agreeable silence settles like a blanket over your frames, and the lights from the city keep your blank focus for the next few minutes, until you feel your eyes beginning to droop. Giving Jaehyun’s shoulder a pat, you say after a yawn, “I should get back to bed. And you should get back to…whatever you were doing.”
           The discomfort at the thought spikes for a second before you forcibly dull it again, as your guard stands and gives you a hand to help you up. “Would it be too much to ask you to take at least one guard the next time you decide to disappear from your room in the middle of the night?”
           “I’m afraid so. It defeats the purpose.”
           He doesn’t look surprised at your answer, just slightly disappointed. “Alright, then. But I’m increasing the security in your wing at night. Can’t make it so easy for you to escape.”          
You smile at the thought of the challenge, already plotting new routes in your brain. Maybe a disguise? By the time you reach your room, your eyes are threatening to shut fully. Jaehyun escorts you to the door, gives you a polite ‘Try not to do anything else that could jeopardise your safety tonight.’, and waits for you to sleepily nod and shut the door behind you. The sounds of him walking away accompany you on your journey to your own bed, and the thoughts of his destination continue to leave an unwelcome, sour taste in your mouth till you fall asleep.
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           The General’s tone is mocking when he asks, “What do you think, your Highness?”
           “It’s a terrible idea.”
           The silence in the wake of your proclamation is so loud, you could hear a pin drop. Maybe it’s a good thing you hadn’t spoken all these days, if only to stun the advisors into listening when you finally do.
           The General sits similarly baffled for a second, but he’s the first to break the heavy quiet. Clearing his throat and darting a nervous glance at your father, he asks, “How so, your Highness?”
           “If we do that, we come off as brutes.”
           “So, we give in to their demands?”
           “Then we’ll come off as pushovers.”
           He grits his teeth, shooting another look at your father, who only looks on with approval. With great delight, you watch as the General takes a moment to calm himself, and asks in thinly-veiled annoyance, “Then what do you suggest, your Highness?”
           You’re having far too much fun pushing his buttons, so you take your time leaning back in your chair, seeming unbothered, like you have all the time in the world. You let the silence stretch, watching as the advisors roll their eyes and let out small huffs of frustration at your antics, and quietly delight at the morphing of appreciation into exasperation on your father’s face. Finally, just when the General opens his mouth again, you cut him off. “Instead of taxes, demand something else. A percentage of profits from any goods transported through our kingdom. A cut of their infantry to handle security and maintenance of the new corridor. Control over a minor port city from their territory, enough to give us a better foothold in global sea trade. You’ll increase their employment and reduce wastage of our resources at the same time.”
           Worried glances are exchanged when you finish, but they don’t bother you. You’ve said what you’ve been wanting to say for the last week. On seeing that there’s no reply forthcoming from anybody else, the King claps his hands with an air of finality and commandingly says, “Looks like we’ve got our work cut out for us in the next few sessions. We’ll consider each option. Send a rider saying they’ll have our decision within the fortnight.”          
You’re the first to get up from the table, and you feel eyes on you. Suspicious eyes, irritated eyes, slightly impressed eyes. At least now, they’re taking notice. You lift your chin up higher, deliberately not sparing them another glance, except for a nod at your father. Jaehyun’s proud expression meets yours before he and Hyejin take their places behind you, escorting you out of the silent war room.
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           The next few weeks are easier than the first, partly because the council has started listening to you in the meetings after that first day, and partly because you’re slowly getting used to palace life again. You might have had freedom out at sea, but you didn’t have silk covers to crawl into every night and rose-scented bath water to soak in to your heart’s content every day. Your mornings are spent in meetings, drafting new policies and regularly butting heads with the General. In the evenings, you train with your guards. Your years away have made you comfortable with the sword, and every session with Jaehyun leaves both parties sweaty and satisfied. Hyejin has taken it upon herself to improve your archery skills, and her tough-love approach makes your limbs sore and achy, but the burn keeps your head clear, even if you do end up having to moan and groan your way to bed every night.
           You’ve been caught by Jaehyun lots of times on the terrace. You refrain from pointing out the details that make you stiffen – the unlaced tunic, the small, purpling bruise on his jaw, the mussed hair, and eyes that are too alert for two in the morning. These meetings all usually go the same way. A few minutes of awkwardness as you apologise for interrupting him and he waves you away, a few more minutes of silence where you both watch the darkened horizon, and then the stories. You’ve told him about the spices you’ve encountered on your travels that make your eyes water with just a whiff, the overgrown island with no inhabitants that you had run aground on, that one stormy night as the ship tossed on tsunami-like waves, making you wonder if you would see the sun again. You tell him about your crew – about Johnny, your first mate, and Yuta and Irene, with their pirate origins. You can’t keep the longing from your voice as you narrate these tales, however much you try. For his part, Jaehyun silently listens as you speak yourself to tiredness, till you’re finally ready to go to bed with the knowledge that you’ll fall asleep this time, and then escorts you to your rooms. In the morning, neither of you make any mention of it.
           Four days a week, you sit out of council meetings and head to the library for your statecraft education with Junmyeon. You wish you could say they were going as smoothly as everything else; it’s still difficult to sit in one place and listen to him drone on about history without falling asleep. Once, even Jaehyun had to be shaken awake by a discreetly yawning Hyejin as they both stood guard. Of course, it hadn’t been your fault he had spent the night awake.
“What happened in 1732?”
Junmyeon’s question pulls you out of the hard, perhaps too wild, glare you’ve been directing at one of those blasted flies for the better part of the last hour. You vaguely recollect a mention of the year in question during the session, but your memory stops at that.
“A war,” you hazard.
Probingly, your tutor asks, “Which war?”
“The, uh, Great War of…1732?”
You get an unimpressed huff in response. He sits back in his chair, seeming so defeated that you almost feel bad for him. Almost.
“It was the Final War of Demacia. Nearly half our current trade routes are possible due to the victory, and some of our biggest exports are from the lands we annexed during that period.”
That sounds like something you should have known.
You’re trying to formulate an appropriately chastised response, and you are chastised, when an interruption manifests itself in the form of a throat being cleared.
“That’s enough for today, Junmyeon. Thank you.”
You feel your blood chill at the sound of your mother’s voice. You slowly turn around to see her serenely gliding out from in between bookshelves. As Junmyeon gives a short bow and gathers his books, you try to school your expression into one of passivity and calm. The Queen, in all her regality, refuses to look at you, preferring to let you stew and fidget as you straighten your back. She takes your tutor’s seat, directly opposite your own, calmly leaning back.
“Your father would like to step down as reigning monarch by year’s end.”
“What now?”
“He’ll be announcing his decision during the Annual Winter Ball, two months from now.”
“I’m sorry?”
“He’ll also be announcing your ascent, and the coronation preparations will begin soon.”
“Hold on a second,” you cry out, your increasing agitation at the surprise conversation finally culminating in a panicked shout. “What makes you think I’m ready for this? That the kingdom is ready for this?”
“You have been ready for this since you were born. This is what you have been training for.”
“You saw how terrible I am at history.”
Your mother’s placid expression doesn’t change. In the same, calm tone, she says, “We will look at different forms of teaching. Junmyeon suggested outdoor lessons. Maybe combined with your archery classes.”
Your thoughts are all jumbled, but before you can protest, the Queen holds up a palm - the first sign of assertion in the entire conversation. “What you cannot learn before sitting on the throne, you can learn on the job. Your father and I will be there to guide you.”
Her voice becomes more forceful as she continues, drowning out the beginnings of your misgivings. “It is time for a change of ruler. The kingdom will gain confidence in your leadership only once you begin to take decisions. We will start with weekly rounds of the capital city so they may be re-acquainted with you. After the coronation, a tour of the entire territory under you will be necessary, of course.”
You open your mouth once. Close it. Open and close again. Nothing comes out but a weak sort of whimper.
The Queen’s eyes turn gentle. “You have been training for so many years. Diplomacy comes naturally to you, and loathe as I am to admit this, your years as a ship’s captain have taught you leadership and given you real-world experience of the kingdom outside the castle. You’ve already begun to make your mark on the war council’s decisions. This is but a natural progression. The next step.”
“I’m not ready,” you manage to choke out. The little speech has served to only further your concerns, reminding you of the magnitude of the conversation. “I thought I had a couple of years left.”
“You will be a kind and just ruler, I am sure of it. You just need a little more focus and confidence.”
All you can do is chew your lip in consternation.
“There is also another matter.” A flash of uncertainty crosses your mother’s face, so quick that you think for a moment that you imagined it. “As per custom, a ruler must take a consort within the first year of ascension.”
At this, your face turns stony, nervousness giving way to annoyance. A reaction she must have anticipated, given her hand coming up to pacify once more, before you get a chance to hotly reply. “I am well aware that you have no intention of marrying immediately. I also have full confidence in the fact that you are capable of ruling this kingdom single-handedly. But the job takes a lot, and after a point, a companion will become necessary to keep you grounded. All I’m asking of you is to think it over. Scope out some of the neighbouring kingdoms for eligible suitors. We can organise a ball if needed.”
  For the second time in the conversation, you’re left speechless, mouth opening and closing like a fish. You can tell when a discussion has room for disagreement. This one brooks none.
Like she didn’t just drop life-changing news on your lap with all the delicateness of a wild horse, your mother gives you a pat on your arm, stands up, and glides out of the room.
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“Big day, huh?”
You chuckle bitterly. 
“Understatement of the fucking century,” you bite out.
The kingdom - your kingdom - is darker than usual tonight. A festival at a nearby village took place, meaning the people of the capital were spending the night there. The lack of light from houses means the stars are clearer, twinkling mockingly at your slumped over frame.
Jaehyun doesn’t seem his usual dishevelled self tonight either. All clothes in place, outline of his dagger in his boot. You don’t want to think he might have come to realise how therapeutic you found these tower conversations, and figured that you might have needed a little more company after the revelations of the day, but you know he’s a perceptive man, and that’s probably exactly what happened.
“Would you like to talk about it?”
His voice is a low rumble, gentle and coaxing. You’ve almost always been able to hide nothing from him when he speaks that way. 
Over the last few weeks, you’ve come to appreciate his solid presence, whether as a bodyguard during the day or a friend after sunset. He and Hyejin make you feel safe, and keep you company in your largely isolated existence. These facts you always knew. But the night-time adventures have been new. As a bodyguard, Jaehyun is a fighter through and through, always committed to his job to protect you. But these conversations, where he lets you talk yourself to exhaustion every night, decides to stay up with you rather than let you think yourself in circles alone, offers his own opinion on things you need some help with, and reassures you when the day has been particularly rough - these have been revelations. You don’t remember this kind of closeness before you left. You had also never really paid much attention to the warmth of his firm shoulder pressing into yours, or the fiery competition in his eyes when you sparred.
“What’s there to say? I’m not ready to rule, and nobody seems to realise that.”
“What makes you think you’re not ready to rule?”
You make a hassled flurry of motion with your hand, a literally-everything gesture, and a disbelieving look that makes him let out a small laugh. You slouch back down, satisfied that your point has been made.
“Alright,” he slowly continues once the silence has settled into a quiet comfort and you’ve calmed down a bit. “When do you think somebody’s ready to rule?”
Huffing, you begin to list out the very same things that had been running through your head for the last few hours. “When they know the history of the kingdom, maybe? When they can stand to be in the same room as their General. Definitely when they can say they’ve actually lived at the palace for an extended period of time recently.”
“Do you want to know what I, and most of the other guards, think?”
“Do share.”
“That you’re fearless and brave. That you can take the tough decisions that need to be taken, and that you love your kingdom enough to be able to recognise its problems and want to fix them. You think you’re not ready, but I - we - think you always have been.”
He’s leaned towards you a bit now, conviction writ large on his face as he searches your expression for a reply that doesn’t seem to be forthcoming. His hair has grown out a bit, a couple of dark brown strands fluttering near his temples in the gentle midnight breeze. When did he grow so tall?
You need to look away, overwhelmed by his response and the quiet certainty with which he says it.
Clearing your throat, you let the soundless dark settle once more around you after his proclamation. When you feel comfortable, you give voice to your other concern.
“How am I supposed to find somebody and convince them to marry me in a few months?”
You had hoped he had another speech prepared for this one, but the answering silence drags. When you turn to look at him, he’s not facing you. Leaned back on his hands, palms supporting his frame and shoulders bunched up as he lets his legs dangle off the edge, he surveys the city sprawled in front of him. You take in the angles of his face, the slow blink of fluttering eyelashes, as his neck bobs with a swallow. If you weren’t surveying him so closely under the pretext of waiting for an answer, you wouldn’t have noticed the rueful smile that mars his visage, a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it expression that immediately morphs into blankness.
“Anybody would be a fool to turn you down, your Highness.”
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The next few weeks pass in a flurry of vigorous activity. 
Your lessons are upped, and surprisingly more effective when taken outdoors. Junmyeon looks hilariously out of place in the garden, noticeably uncomfortable with the bees and the dirt, but he does his best, and the effort makes you eager to learn. It’s easier to stay awake when you want to witness the next rapidly-masked disgusted expression that crosses his face when a butterfly lands a little too close to his books.
You’ve become markedly better at archery, now dedicating a good portion of your day to practising on moving targets. Sword fighting, despite needing less attention, remains your preferred method of unwinding in the evenings.
Council meetings are easier, you find, now that you know you have the support of the guards standing along the edges of the room. Jaehyun’s words keep coming back to you every time you speak, and they lend a certain confidence to your words that you can certainly do with. Even the General has begun to ask for your opinion in a less mocking tone, and your father’s tacit approval has only become more apparent.
Your nightly rendezvous has come to a standstill. Part of you admits that it’s because your days are so packed that you hardly have any trouble falling asleep anymore, but you can’t ignore the fact that there’s been a tangible shift in the atmosphere between you and Jaehyun. There are no more muffled chuckles when you say something stupid, no more secret glances between meals when you look up from your soup towards the guards. Even sword fighting, while still exhilarating and adrenaline-inducing, has become purely transactional. A spar and then nothing. No goading, no whining. He bows, slides his sword back into his sheath, and you’re princess and guard once more. You feel like an invisible line had been crossed that night, and you flounder to steady your feet on the other side now. If Hyejin notices, she makes no mention of it.
Per the Queen’s plan, you’ve taken to roaming around the city when you can, usually in the late afternoons and near-dusks, when the streets are less crowded. These visits are filled with citizens either peering curiously at you while unobtrusively standing at their doorways, or approaching you with their problems. You make it a point to listen to all of them, even going so far as to get one of the palace librarians to accompany you so they can take down notes. This is one of your favourite parts of the day, you’ve come to realise. Understanding your people’s concerns and thinking of ways to help them.
The only real challenge to your otherwise smoothly operating schedule is the Annual Winter Ball. Every night, you come back to your room to find dozens of extravagant gowns in a multitude of colours and designs, hanging from so many racks that you can barely make your way to your bed. The ones you like are sent to your mother for final approval, and the ones you don’t are carted back to the modiste. They’re all fashionable, full of silk trimmings and lace ties, figure-hugging and made with lovely, soft fabrics. They’re also a pain to go through at the end of the day.
The bigger annoyance that’s present in your room every night is the bundle of portraits of princes and princesses from neighbouring kingdoms, suitors that you’re expected to choose from. To you, most of them look the same - same aristocratic high nose, strong chin, their credentials boasting leadership of successful armies and how close they are to ascending the throne. You try picturing yourself with them, any of them, but the image doesn’t form. 
To make things worse, the Queen has taken to accosting you in different parts of the castle. In between her work organising the Ball and your rounds between the numerous tasks that are keeping you busy, she appears from behind pillars and materialises from the bushes. Her presence is always heralded by questions about who is going to be on your arm that evening, whether anybody has caught your eye. You wave her away with excuses of your packed schedule, pretend that you’re so very excited to reach your lessons on time, but her expression is knowing, and you believe it’s only a matter of time before she stops indulging your pathetic attempts at evasion.
It looks like today, your luck has finally run out.
“Are you going to keep watching?” you pant, as you parry a thrust, twisting your sword with a slide of metal against Jaehyun’s as you move it down and away before stepping towards him. For his part, he remains focussed on the fight, sweat dripping from his forehead and neck, tunic sticking to his frame as he mirrors with his own countermove.
From the side, your mother replies, “Will that be a problem?”
Your attention is caught by a lock of Jaehyun’s hair coming free of its set position, flopping over his forehead. It distracts you enough to not notice his subsequent strike, and the next thing you know, your sword is flying out of your grip and the tip of his is pointed steadily at the centre of your neck. You hold his glance for a long second, taking in the pride in his eyes and the quick smirk that vanishes instantly. Chests heaving with harsh pants, you both step away from each other. He gives you a short bow before moving away, closer to Hyejin who’s standing a bit further, to give you and the Queen some privacy.
It was a stupid loss. You have no right to get side tracked by something like that.
You gather your wits about you, knowing you’ll need them for the ensuing conversation. You can recognise the end of the line when you see it. Your mother remains silent until you’ve retrieved your sword and sat down next to her.
“I liked the blue dress, the one with the lace sleeves and silver bodice.”
You nod mutely in reply, acknowledging her approval of your choice. “What do you think about Prince Taeyong?” you counter, preferring to have this conversation done with.
“Second in line to the Cilician throne? A diplomatically strong match. Do you like him?”
“I will take him to the Ball, but I will not name him my husband so soon, after meeting with him once. If he turns out to be disgusting and awful, and chews with his mouth open, I reserve the right to never see him again and to look for a different suitor.”
The Queen lifts her oft-repeated pacifying gesture. “Of course. Nobody is forcing you to wed somebody you do not wish to. I’m glad you've made such a sensible choice. We’ll send out a special invitation at once.”
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The third pin pokes you somewhere between your fourth and fifth rib, making you wince and let out a small squeak of surprise. The sewing mistress gives a low apology, but remains focussed on her job of gathering extra fabric from your shift and pinning it in place for alterations. You’re stood in the middle of your room, arms held out as two maids take measurements there and a third flits around your frame, making marks on your corset and humming periodically. The blue dress that’s been decided on hangs next to you in its frame, and occasionally, the head tailor, who’s writing down notes and surveying the preparations, looks between you and the dress. Sunlight streams into the room, illuminating the swathes of fabric strewn across the floor. 
For nearly an hour, you’ve stood in this position, mostly patiently letting the tailors do their job. You have enough to keep yourself occupied. The thought of the Ball, just about a week away, where your coronation will be announced. The thought of Prince Taeyong, arriving at the castle in two days, whom you’ll have on your arm when the announcement is made. The thought of Jaehyun, always the thought of Jaehyun, standing on the other side of your door, stoic and stone-faced, never smiling at you anymore.
He’s taken to appearing more and more dishevelled in the mornings. Not once slipping at his job, but showing up bleary-eyed and with more marks around his neck at various stages of bruising. Stories of him frequenting seedy pubs and getting into fistfights reach you occasionally, and you can’t help but worry. But talking to him now is like talking to an enemy kingdom’s visiting embassy. Curt and perfunctorily polite responses, never elaborate and never giving any real information.
In the middle of your melancholy, your unseeing eye catches sight of a flash of a deep, red velvet, rich and grand, at the bottom of the pile on your bed. You don’t remember reviewing it before.
“May I see the red one there, please?”
A servant gently pulls it out, holding it up against her frame so you can see it fall clearly.
The neck is low - just short of too low for propriety - and the gold embroidery runs all over the fabric, highlighting the waist and neckline. Your mother would have a lot to say if you wore that for the Ball. But it can’t hurt to have it altered to your measurements, can it? Surely an opportunity will present itself sometime. Knowing that you’re setting yourself up for another hour in your current position, you give the order to ready the red dress as well.
A sharp knock on the door is the second thing to interrupt your thoughts.
“Your Highness?” comes Jaehyun’s low voice, muffled through the heavy wood.
Unthinking, perhaps uncaring, paying no mind to your current state of undress, you call out, “Come in.”
The tailors continue their work as if nothing has happened, as if a (tall, dashing, handsome) man is not standing in their vicinity while their future Queen is wearing nothing but a thin chemise and trying on different corsets. But you notice. And Jaehyun notices.
For a second, he stays on the threshold, just in the way of a sunbeam, his earlier focussed expression wiped from his face and shock replacing it. His eyes widen, and you revel in the small spike of emotion on his face, the tiniest morsel of animation you’ve managed to extract from him recently. You’re suddenly very aware of the broadness of his shoulders, the way his face is thrown into stark definition by the noon sunlight, soft hair a shade lighter in this position.
“What’s the matter?” you ask, your voice admirably steady.
But if that was admirable, Jaehyun’s subsequent transformation is nothing short of medal-worthy. His back straightens, confident and alert once more, and his visage is a smooth mask of nothing again. “The war council will begin within the hour. They’ve sent a messenger asking if they should wait for your arrival or proceed.”
“Let them start. I should be there momentarily.”
Your bodyguard gives a short, crisp bow, and then he’s spinning on the heel of his foot and walking out, not sparing you another glance, not sparing a thought for the burning you can feel just under the surface of your skin in all the spots his heated gaze had slowed.
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Prince Taeyong is textbook. Handsome, kind, and gracious. He sits down only after you have, he listens to your answers attentively, and he’s one of the finest swordsmen of his kingdom. He’s only spent two days at the palace, but you’ve found yourself enjoying your time with him. The two of you had taken a round around the gardens earlier, the first time you could interact freely, and the glimpses you caught of his hidden candour delighted you.
The castle has been steadily filling up over the last few days with visiting royalty and the upper echelons in attendance for the Ball. The North and the West wings are reserved for guests, but meals are taken together in the large dining hall. Every dinner is a gamut of chatter, and the gardens are significantly crowded during the days. With just two days left for the Ball, excitement and anticipation are heavy in the air, and you’ve come across more than a few groups engrossed in animated discussion about their outfits and the rumoured crystal sculpture.
Nobody knows about the big announcement, of course. Your father stepping down while still in good health will come as a surprise to citizens and allies alike, but you don’t have the luxury of that ignorance.
Prince Taeyong may be charming, respectful, and friendly, but he can’t help you with your resurgent sleepless nights. The closer the Ball looms, the less sleep you manage to catch. However far you push yourself in training, however busy you keep yourself during the day, unconsciousness stays out of reach every night.
You had tried the terrace, hoping you could reclaim some semblance of your former friendship with Jaehyun under the cover of dark in a familiar setting, but it had been Hyejin who came to retrieve you. And she was less susceptible to your sob stories than Jaehyun was. With her, it was off to bed and not out of your room again until sunrise.
Jaehyun continues to remain distant, if not a little cold. You had noticed the clenching of his jaw when Taeyong had assisted you out of a patch of wet mud, the tightening of his grip on his sword when you had helped Taeyong up with a hand after a friendly spar. Every morning, you hope you’ll get more than one word answers and curt nods from him, but he remains frustratingly unavailable.
You’re back on the tower tonight, stars once again twinkling at your anxiety. You can feel your eyebrows drawn close together, the creases on your forehead, and the knots on your neck. The vast expanse of the kingdom beneath your feet only serves to heighten the magnitude of what’s about to happen, the population that you’ll be serving and be responsible for. You’re so preoccupied with your worries that you don’t hear the muffled footsteps approaching behind you, even in the stifling quiet of the night.
“Can’t sleep?”
A large hand gently settles in between your shoulder blades to calm you down when you give an alarmed cry, a soft thing of surprise. Jaehyun’s palm burns through your coat, your night robe, your shift. He lets it drop once he realises that you’ve recognised him, and takes a seat next to you.
You’re so stunned at the minute interaction, at the fact that he’s here, sitting next to you like you’re old friends, that you can’t say anything for a second. Suddenly, the only thing you can feel is anger.
“Can I help you with something?” you ask, pulling your back straight, using the haughtiest tone you can.
Jaehyun has the audacity to seem confused, eyebrows knitting together as he turns his head towards you. “I thought you might appreciate the company, your Highness.”
“Oh?” Your voice is a hiss, an excuse for the shout you want to let out instead. “You think you can spend weeks ignoring me, being an absolute asshole to me, treating me as nothing more than your charge, refusing to even look me in the eye, and then waltz here in the middle of the night and expect me to welcome you?” you bite out.
His face becomes stormy, and it electrifies you. Good. 
“How would you like me to treat you, your Highness? Am I not your bodyguard? Is it not my duty to treat you like my charge?”
Unconsciously, you lean towards him, meeting him eye to eye, matching his cool annoyance with your own irritation. Weeks of pent up frustration are evident in your voice. “You know what I mean,” you stubbornly reply. “We used to be friends. You used to tell me about your adventures in the city, and I’d tell you about the shit in my head. What the fuck happened?”
“Friends?” he bites out, the word dripping with venom. “You’re the Crown Princess. I’m your bodyguard. Being a friend is not in the job description.”
“Then what are you doing here now?”
Silence. 
You’re both facing each other, slid close together enough for your knee to dig into the side of his thigh, and for you to make out all the emotions flitting across his face. Shock, like you’ve slapped him. Rage. Frustration, sadness, all of them come and go in a terrifying sequence until his well-worn blankness is back. That angers you the most. His gaze flickers down to your lips, before he draws back, as if burned. As if you’ve burned him.
He scrambles up, the most inelegant you’ve ever seen him. Before you can get a word in, and you’re not sure what you would have said because you’re slightly panting from the sheer chargedness of the interaction, Jaehyun is on his feet. Something in the way he stands, gingerly, delicately, makes the syllables stop on the tip of your tongue.
His next expression shocks you, completely throwing you off balance. He looks down, meeting your eyes for the first time in so long, and the sheer helplessness on his face knocks the wind out of your body. “I have no idea,” he mumbles in reply to your pointed question.
By the time you’re finished grappling for words, he’s bowed and left the terrace.
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“You’re ready.”
“I’m about to vomit.”
“I felt better after vomiting on the day of my coronation.”
A smile tugs at the corner of your mouth, but the momentary lightness is overshadowed by the nerve-wracking anxiety that you’ve been plagued by since you woke up from a restless sleep this morning. The King and Queen sit on either side of you on your bed, the Royal Family indulging in one last private conversation before the festivities of the evening change your life forever. No longer a Princess, but a Queen-to-be. You feel another lurch in your gut at the thought.
Your father continues in a reassuring voice, “The announcement is a small affair. Once everybody has sat down for dinner, I will rise and announce that I am stepping down. Once I name you my successor, you will rise, acknowledge our allies, and say a few words about serving the citizens of this kingdom. Remember - this is only the announcement, a duty on our part to let the people know what is coming in the future.”
You nod, trying to force yourself to calm down.
“You are going to be a Queen. Remember that. Channel that.” Your mother’s tone is firm, confident, and leaves no room for uncertainty. It gets the job done better than the gentle platitudes ever could. Time to act like a Queen.
With a last few encouraging sentences, your parents are out the door, leaving you alone in your room once more, butterflies going wild in your stomach. You face your reflection in the mirror, surveying the results of the last few hours of work by the tailors and servants.
The blue dress hangs off your frame beautifully, regal and soft. You wish you were in your ship, in your breeches and belts, or in your daily dresses that let you be passed off as nothing more than a lower member of the aristocracy; but it’s too late for that now. A glance outside your window, at the rooftops of houses closest to the palace under the dusk sky, reminds you of all the improvements you’ve yet to make to this kingdom. Your kingdom.
Act like a Queen, you remind yourself, trying to inflect some fierceness in your expression.
A knock on the door interrupts your self-soothing. Smoothing down your dress, you call out, “Come in!”
You see his reflection before you see him. Jaehyun isn’t in his regular guard uniform, instead having opted for a grander coat that looks specially tailored for his tall frame. His hair looks a bit neater than usual, as if styled, and there’s no sword in his belt.
As you’ve been surveying him, he looks at you. He’s long given up the infuriating façade of nothingness, and makes no move to mask his emotions as his eyes give you a scan.
For a long moment, the two of you only analyse each other, not a word spoken. But when he does speak, it makes a shiver run down your spine.
“My Queen,” he says, bowing low, lower than he ever has before.
Your throat suddenly feels very dry.
“Not quite yet,” you mumble, once he’s risen and back to standing straight, not looking away from you. “Shouldn’t you be getting ready for the ceremony? How are you going to protect me without a sword?”
“I’ve taken the evening off, your Highness.”
“I’m sorry?”
“I asked the Captain of the Guard for a leave so I could enjoy the festivities with a…friend.”
The hesitation doesn’t escape your notice. You wish it had, because now, in addition to the roiling in your stomach, you’ve got a heart that’s beating unhealthily fast. “A friend,” you say, your voice dangerously soft.
“A friend,” he repeats, nodding.
You take a moment to compose yourself. “And you are sure this arrangement is just for today? Will I wake up tomorrow morning and find that you’ve handed in your notice so you can go running off to your friend everyday?”
A beat of silence. Jaehyun’s face closes over, and you can see the tell-tale signs of him about to bow and leave. Before he can, before his spine can so much as twitch, you say, loud and commanding, “You have not been dismissed.”
Something ugly twists in his features, his eyes widening imperceptibly as you take a step towards him. “Why are you here, Jaehyun? If the Commander has already granted you permission, why have you come here to tell me of your plans this evening?”
“You know why I’m here, your Highness.”
“Say my name.”
You’ve taken more steps towards him now, close enough that you have to tilt your head up a bit to meet his eyes. That same pleading look from the last night on the terrace crosses his face, respect warring with whatever desire he’s fighting to keep reined in. 
“I can’t,” he whispers.
It isn’t enough. It has never been enough. 
The bitterness comes crashing into you, and hurt, jealousy, and cruelty are apparent when you coldly declare, “Coward.”
You want him to fight. You want him to shout so you can shout back, and then you want him to storm out of the room. Anything but the blankness, anything but the helplessness. You’re close enough now to make out his slow, laboured breaths, deliberate efforts to keep calm and to not do something reckless. You’re sorely disappointed at the immense strength of his restraint.
The insult is countered with a beseeching, “What would you have me do?”
Your title is pointedly absent.
His fists are clenched at his sides.
“Leave,” you bite out. “You are dismissed. Enjoy your evening and your companion.”
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The red dress makes you feel like a Queen. It is fully worth the sharp look you received from your mother when you had entered the Ball after being announced, and it helps you keep your chin up and face set. Not exactly a revenge dress, but you were feeling vindictive. It was an impulse decision, but you carry it so well.
“Your Highness could not be mistaken for anybody less than a Queen tonight.”
You allow a gracious smile to touch your ruby red lips - another last-minute appearance modification. “You are too kind, Prince Taeyong. Again, I apologise for the slight delay. I hope I didn’t keep you waiting for too long?”
“Not at all. Your guests are riveting conversation partners, and there is no dearth of good company in this hall.”
If there wasn’t another, completely infuriating man who has recently taken up permanent residence in your brain-slash-heart, you’d be a little more jealous of the looks your partner has been getting through the evening. He cuts an elegant figure in his fitted suit, highlighting his litheness. The overhanging chandeliers throw the defined lines of his attractive face into further sharpness, and everybody can see his politeness and respect as he interacts with you.
For all you care, any of the aristocracy who have been throwing him sly and appreciative glances can have him. He deserves somebody whose head isn’t currently occupied elsewhere.
Interacting with nobility is exhausting and mind-consuming enough to distract you for a long time. Hyejin and Not-Jaehyun, a temporary replacement, are constantly just a few feet away from you as you make your rounds, your conversations filled with courteous laughter and surface-level discussions of petty territorial disputes. Taeyong stays by your side, per custom, but you try not to lead him on too much. When you eventually have to inform him of your decision to not marry him, you’d rather have a clean, severed tie than draw things out and make them messy. You keep your dances with him limited to two, and as civil as possible.
However hard you try, you can’t stop yourself from subtly scanning the crowd for Jaehyun and his friend. On occasion, you can swear you catch sight of a too-familiar shoulder, or a mop of dark brown hair, but you’re always interrupted by another diplomat that wants an audience. The result means you’re high-strung and on alert throughout the evening, right up until the bell for dinner is sounded and everybody makes their way to the dining hall.
Suddenly, you’ve got much bigger things to be nervous about.
Without paying any real attention, you’re eventually sitting at the head table in between Taeyong and your father, facing the large crowd of guests. Your guests. The bell rings again, signifying an announcement, and suddenly the King is standing, just as planned. You hear your name, ‘my daughter’, ‘lead the kingdom and her people to a glorious future’, all through a haze. There’s some polite clapping, and that’s your cue.
The grace with which you rise is surprising. Your feet are blessedly steady, and your voice seems strong as you begin to speak. Maybe your mother was right. Maybe you are ready. As the words you had planned flow out of you, you receive strength from the crowd, at their rapt attention, at the knowledge that you are here to serve them and that they are here to serve you. Your gaze roves over the audience, words gaining in power and conviction, when you see him.
Jaehyun has never seemed more open than in this moment. His face torn between awe and pride, eyes shining with a fierce loyalty that is reminiscent of the tone he had used when he had addressed you as his Queen. The effect is just as potent the second time, and you have to fight to keep your voice even. In that moment, you know with startling clarity that as you implement all these plans that you’re mentioning, he’s the one you want by your side.
He is noticeably partner-less, only a single person in the midst of other guards who have taken the evening off to enjoy the Ball. The possible explanations run through your head, but you regain your composure, making sure to avoid looking in his direction for the rest of your speech.
When you’re done, you retake your seat, accept Prince Taeyong’s hearty congratulations, exchange short but satisfied nods with your parents, and then promptly take a long draught of the wine in front of you. There’s a weight that’s lifted off your shoulders with the conclusion of the main event of the night, but an unsettling buzz has taken up residence under your skin that’s fighting to be released. On the outside, you’re all smiles and composure, participating in conversations and indulging Taeyong’s friendly interactions, but internally, you’re wound up like a spring, ready to leave and take care of what needs to be taken care of.
When the desert course is finished, and groups of people start to rise, you determine that it’s acceptable for you to leave the proceedings. You direct your attention towards the section of the hall where you had seen Jaehyun, only to find him gone. You feel your palms getting clammy. What if he took your previous hurtful words to heart? What if he really did quit?
“He left by the back way a couple of minutes ago.”
Shocked, you turn towards Taeyong. His eyes are twinkling with amusement, and all of a sudden, you feel like a fool. All this time you thought you were going to be letting him down gently, only to find out now that he’s far smarter than you had given him credit for.
However, appearances must be kept up.
“I’m sure I do not know what you’re referring to, Prince Taeyong.”
Again, with a diplomatic crypticness, he softly replies, “I can assure you, your secret will stay safe with me till the time you choose to reveal it yourself. Now if I may be so bold, I think your young man is getting farther away the longer you remain seated, yes?”
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You feel deflated, tired from the day’s happenings and its buildup, tired from running around the castle looking for Jaehyun. All the optimism and hope and determination you had while leaving the Ball has long since evaporated into thin air, leaving behind nothing but a vague sort of emptiness, and a foreboding that you can’t seem to shake off.
You don’t know which prospect is worse - going back to Jaehyun being a stony-faced guard who refuses to otherwise acknowledge you, or Jaehyun leaving your retinue entirely. Would you rather have bad interaction than none at all? Which would hurt more? Maybe you could grow to love Taeyong in time, maybe he’ll accept somebody who’s obviously pining after somebody else. Maybe you’ve well and truly driven him away.
It’s no surprise that sleep doesn’t come easy, and before you know it, you’re flinging your covers off and making the familiar trek up to the tower. The smooth steps under your feet are all you really register, before you’re throwing open the door to the terrace, desperate to be out of the four walls and under the open sky instead.
Only to see that you aren’t alone.
Jaehyun’s broad, slouched back faces you as he sits in his regular place, legs dangling off the sides of the high wall. You don’t have the time to process what you’re feeling before he turns around at the sound of the door creaking shut.
He doesn’t look surprised to see you. With a defeated, rueful smile, he says, just loud enough for you to hear, “I was wondering when you’d come.”
You’ve imagined so many scenarios of this meeting over the last few hours. What you’d say, how you’d say it, how he’d reply, the worst cases of how it could all end - but now that you’re actually facing him, you find yourself blank. You decide to start with what’s easiest.
“I’m sorry,” you say, warily watching as stands up and makes his way over to you. “For everything. I shouldn’t have pressured you, or called you a coward.”
He stops at a respectable distance, not too close but close enough for you to graze his tunic with an outstretched hand if you so desired. “No, you were right. About all of it. I was scared of what I was feeling, and I took it out on you by being an ass. You didn’t deserve that.”
“What were you feeling?”
It’s the closest you’ve gotten to being so direct about this…whatever this is. You know that this time, he won’t run away.
His head tilts. “Have I not been stupidly obvious?”
“I want to hear you say it,” you softly reply, unable to resist the urge to step closer to him, like a magnet. You look up to see his face, see the emotion swirling in his eyes, right before resolve takes over.
“I feel…,” he starts, voice lowering to a whisper, a secret between the two of you, trapped and treasured in the space between your bodies. “I feel like I’ve spent so many years watching you, that somewhere along the way, the watching became wanting. You distract me so much that I’m scared I can’t protect you. That’s why I started distancing myself, trying to do my job without getting sidetracked.”
His voice is low with confession by the end of his words, and it’s so much more than you had ever thought you wanted, but you’re greedy for more, hungering for more explanation, more proof. “What about all your night-time adventures?”
“Distractions from my distraction. I could never stay away for too long. It’s difficult to be by somebody else’s side at night after being in your presence the entire day. Why do you think I’d drop everything just to come up here and be with you?” Closer now, so close that he barely needs to raise his voice above a mumble for you to hear him. 
“And did you lie about your companion tonight?”
His gaze falters. A momentary slip from the previous vulnerability into darker territory. His tone takes on a sharper note when he says, “Seeing you with Prince Taeyong, knowing he might one day wed you, share your bed…it bothered me. I wanted to see if I could affect you the same way. It was petty of me.”
You step closer now, feeling more confident about where you stand than you ever have, now fully in his space so your front brushes against his. You know that if you reach out to touch him, it won’t stop with an innocent graze of skin against fabric. But you have to know one last thing.
“Why now?” you breathe out, fighting the urge to tip your chin forward just a couple of centimetres, enough for your lips to meet.
With more of that admirable restraint, he manages to murmur, almost in an undertone, “I couldn’t stand it anymore. Every day is agony. How many ever women I spend my nights with, whoever else I decide to court…it’ll always be you. I can’t stay away. And that dress today…I was afraid I was being presumptuous, that I’d be hung for my audacity, but the last few days…I can’t be the only one who feels this.”
The last phrase ends with a questioning inflection, a mixture of pleading and hope writ large on his face, so very close to yours. It’s only right to put him out of his misery. You do so by making that last move, unable to fight what your body so desperately desires any longer.
Your lips clash with a fury of pent-up tension and lingering resentment of the treatment you’ve both been giving each other for the last few weeks. There have been too many skirted-around confessions, too many naked looks, to take this slow. Those shoulders that you’ve spent so long just watching feel just as solid as you had imagined under your palms, flexing as Jaehyun’s arms wind around your waist, pulling you impossibly closer to his frame.
As if mirroring your frenzy, the wind begins to pick up, making you let out a tiny shiver, even as a small sigh leaves your mouth at the nipping on your neck. Jaehyun pulls away, eyes several shades darker, hair messier than you’ve ever seen it, filling you with a quiet pride. And then, you catch sight of a fading mark on the side of his jaw, only visible from this close. You feel something primal in you. Anger? Jealousy. 
“Why don’t you do something about it?” he asks, noticing your pause. He’s challenging you to take the final step, kick off the process of the beginning of the inevitable end of this night - in between the sheets.
You won’t make it that easy.
Your right hand, previously pressed against the side of his firm chest, slowly travels upwards, grazing against the smooth skin of his neck, before you insistently press the pad of your thumb against the offending bruise. Jaehyun hisses, gaze sharpening, his arms tightening around your body reflexively. The eye contact between the two of you is charged when you command, “Say my name.”
For a long minute, there’s no sound but the wind. Neither of you move.
And then he does. Dips his head low, low, until his mouth is right next to your ear, his frame towering over yours and strong arms keeping you in place. His lips brush against the shell of your ear as he whispers your name, voice a low rumble that travels through your spine. 
It flicks a switch that you hadn’t known existed before. Suddenly, you can’t possibly be close enough to him to satiate the need that’s rushing through your body, and if his enthusiasm when he opens the terrace door is any indication, he feels it too.
The mad dash back to your room is punctuated by feverish kisses, palms burning as they run over bodies, and painfully long moments of peering around corners to make sure there’s nobody there to witness the depravity. When you finally reach your corridor, the two of you enter your room as dignified as you possibly can, only staying apart long enough for the door to shut behind you. In the next instant, you’re both sharing the same space, the same air, pulling desperate sounds out of each other. The clothes can’t come off fast enough, and you don’t tire of hearing your name drop from his lips.
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“Good morning, Hyejin.”
“Your Highness.”
“Good morning, Hyejin.”
“...Jaehyun.”
“Are you surprised?” you ask, genuinely curious, impressed by your guard’s lack of reaction except for a single raised eyebrow at your other guard stepping out of your room with you in the morning.
Hyejin shrugs. “Not particularly. You two haven’t been very…subtle.”
Tiny spots of colour appear on Jaehyun’s cheeks, matching the tiny, fresh bruises that you know are there right below his collar, safely hidden. You can’t help but grin. “I’m sorry for the discomfort that might have caused you.”
“No apology necessary, your Highness. I would be glad of a new partner, one that’s less broody all the time.”
Jaehyun’s jaw drops in offence, making you chuckle as he splutters his protests. Unconsciously, he’s stepped into his regular guarding position, two steps behind you on your right. With a grin, you soothingly pat his arm, dragging him next to you instead. 
“There, there,” you say, exchanging amused glances with Hyejin out of the corner of your eye. “Let’s go tell my mother that I’ve found somebody not completely repulsive to stand next to me at the coronation.”
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ateezgf · 2 years
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OUR PRINCE CHARMING WITH HIS CHARMING SMILE
HAPPY YEOSANG DAY — to our cute maltese fierce doberman .. i hope you are surrounded by all the love and joy you so rightfully deserve & i hope you continue being recognized for all the greatness you put out into this world every day ♡ 
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botticelii · 2 years
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FOREVER ONE FIRST STAGE
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chuimoon · 1 year
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🌸 seonghwa 🌸
‧͙⁺˚*・༓☾Please like/reblog if you save/use☽༓・*˚⁺‧͙
You can use my edits but please don’t reupload them as your own :-)
Follows/Feedback are appreciated ♡
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clyejis · 2 years
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tsuki ♡ gingamingayo ♡ 220313
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ateezbot · 2 years
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hanse shows us how to “play” his new tattoo 🎸
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katebacks · 1 year
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Series The Bet: Haunted House - JHK
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→ pairing | Jung Hoseok x Reader
→ genre | smut, angst, enemys to lovers!au
→ word count | 6,431
→ summary | Because of your friends, Hoseok thought you hated him, and you thought the same. But after they bet on spending Halloween Eve night in an abandoned house, everything changes.
→ warnings |sex, Adult content(a lot), alcoholic beverages, low slang words.
→ A/N| Please reblog and like if you liked it, Tumblr is loving to end blogs around here by cutting their visibility. DON'T DO WHAT THE CHARACTERS DID. I'm not talking about sex, if you are of legal age and want to, do it. I'm talking about going to abandoned places at night. Be careful, there are a lot of bad people in the world just waiting for a chance to hurt you. Stay safe. The house is not haunted at all, so don't worry, there's nothing terrifying about this story.
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“I can’t fucking believe that we are doing this.” It must have been the fifteenth time the boy next to you had said the same sentence, it was almost like it was in a loop. And you completely agreed with him, you didn't believe you were doing such a stupid thing, mostly, you didn't believe you were heading towards an abandoned house next to Jung Hoseok, the most beautiful and most annoying man you knew. The vodka you had been drinking nonstop for two hours before getting in that car wasn't making you any more comfortable with the situation. But you had to take that bet, there was no way you were going to let your friends think you were scared to spend the Halloween night in the most famous abandoned house in town; even if you were hella scared. "Why the hell did you have to bet me too?" He took his eyes off the road for a second, staring at her and then back to the street dimly lit by the car's headlights. "Were you that desperate to be alone with me in a place, but are you so proud to say, that you had to take the two of us to an abandoned house?"
Although you sometimes wanted to beat Hoseok until he passed out, you couldn't deny how cute he was. He had that emo badboy vibe, wore dark eye makeup and painted his nails black, and wore really heavy clothes. He had that hate-filled look in his eyes, but at the same time, his expression didn't say anything. And that black hair, god you wanted to get your fingers into that hair. You weren't sure why you hated him so much, maybe it was to mask all the lust and attraction you felt for him, maybe it was the fact that you felt annoyed that you were the only one of your friends who hadn't slept with him.  And you also didn't know why he hated you so much, you just knew that from the first time you saw each other, you started insulting each other.
"You can keep dreaming, Hoseok, because the only reason I bet you is to prove to everyone that you're just a scared chicken."
He snorted.
"Yeah, keep telling yourself that, maybe you'll believe it one day." The two then fell silent again, the atmosphere in the car heavy, and it was so quiet outside that you could only hear the car's engine. You then started feeling anxious and rethinking the whole situation. You were going to a place in the middle of nowhere, a house hidden in the middle of the forest, in a place where no living soul had stepped in years; except of course the drunk and drugged wanderers who were likely to commit crimes and hide in the house. It wasn't a place for two young adults to go to at dawn. It was very dangerous and that's how horror movies started: with two idiots snooping around where they shouldn't.
"Okay, maybe this was a bad idea, Hoseok." He arched an eyebrow, but he didn't take his eyes off the road or said a word. "This can be quite dangerous, we don't know what we can find there." And you paused. "Perhaps we should both give up this challenge and accept whatever the punishment is."
"I'll not give up." he scoffed. "If you want wimp out, go ahead, I'll stop the car and you'll go back." He said slowing the car down, and you widened your eyes.
"Are you going to let me go back by my self? Down this deserted road?"
"Or you can just stop being a coward and finish the damn dare."
“Ugh, fine.” You crossed your arms, huffing and leaning back in the seat. "But if I die, I'm going to make your life hell,"
"If you die, I will too, honey."
And for some strange reason, you felt comfortable with the nickname.
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A few minutes later, after being silent again, both saw a dirt road that entered the forest, when approaching closer, you saw a huge tree fallen to the ground, blocking the entire passage. Due to its size, you would not be able to go around it, you would have to walk from there. Hoseok stopped the car as close to the side of the road as possible, turned off the engine and both got out of the car, feeling the temperature drop instantly. You hugged your body, while the guy went to the trunk and took out a backpack. After locking the car, he was the first to jump over the tree, turning around and waiting for you. You still felt like that was a bad idea. And Hoseok knew it. He glued his eyes together and moistened his lips before speaking.
"Do you want to stay in the car?" He could see your eyes twinkling when he suggested it. And he found it adorable.
"Will you stay with me?" You had never used such a soft tone of voice with him before, and he might not admit it, but he liked it. And it would be interesting to spend the night in a car with you, but he was too proud for that.
"I'm not giving up on the challenge, (y/n). I'm staying in the house." You shook your head, your jaw quivering too much from the cold to argue, then just sighed and headed towards the tree, climbing it. When you stood on top of the fallen log, Hoseok who was on the other side, adjusted the backpack on his back and stretched his arms towards you, helping you down, and before the mood started to get weird, he started walking again down the dirt road towards the abandoned house.
The road was surrounded by giant trees that covered the sky with their leaves, not letting you see above them. It was cold down there, and the street grew dark as you went further. You could hear crickets, tree branches bumping against each other pushed by the wind, you could hear the wind whistling violently, and you could hear your heart beating in your ear. You've never been afraid of the dark, you've never had to sleep with the light on, you've never been afraid of what could be hiding in your closet or under your bed, but at that moment you were afraid of what might be lurking behind those trees.
You looked at Hoseok, and he didn't look scared at all, in fact he looked thoughtful. And focused. He was a very confident guy, he trusted himself and in his abilities, whatever he wanted, he would go out there and get it. You envied that about him. And your thoughts were interrupted when you heard something like dry branches being broken, as if someone was stepping on them, and it came from the middle of the bush. The sound made you involuntarily jump to Hoseok's side and grab his hand and his arm, both of you stopping walking as you stared at the place where the noise seemed to have come from. The boy looked at you, all curled up as you held on to him and he could only smile, that was the first time you had touched him willingly. Another sound of the same kind came from the bushes and you stifled a squeak, turning all at once towards him, bumping into his body, hiding your face in his chest, closing your eyes tightly, hugging him around the waist. You've never been so terrified, and that wasn't funny.
"Hey, it's okay." Hoseok tried to calm you down, hugging you and running his hand through your hair, not trying to push you away, just trying to reassure you that nothing was going to happen. "You're safe with me, don't worry. It's just a few branches snapping, there's nothing to fear, I promise."
"What if it's some wild animal? A bear or a wolf."
"We don't have animals in these forests, the most it can be is a stray cat, it won't hurt us." His voice was extremely calm, and smooth, and oddly enough, you were starting to calm down. You never thought that one day you would be soothed by Jung Hoseok, but at that moment, he didn't seem to hate you that much. Then you slowly lifted your head, opening your startled eyes and looking at the image of his dimly lit face, he stared back at you, bringing one of his hands to your cheek, caressing it slowly before coming to his senses and realizing what was happening. He cleared his throat and took a step back. "Let's go on, huh?" You blinked slowly before nodding, ducking your head, trying to ignore your burning cheeks. "Come on, hold my hand." He said reaching out his hand to you which you accepted quickly, letting his big hand encircle yours.
The rest of the way to the house was calm, and although you were still startled by the noises of the forest, having Hoseok's palm against yours was helping you not to lose your mind. A few minutes later, you were able to visualize at the very bottom, at the end of that road, a very humble little house. As you got closer, the feeling that something could go wrong increased. And knowing that it wouldn't do any good to ask Hoseok to come back and forget about that damn bet, you just took a deep breath, as if you were already preparing for the worst.
When you finally got to the house, you could see how deplorable it was. The wood was faded and rotten. The window panes were broken and the porch wood creaked as they stepped on it. The front door was half open, and the moonlight that had illuminated most of its way there didn't reach inside the house. Hoseok took a flashlight out of his backpack and you frowned, you didn't know people still used those things even with the advancement of technology and flashlights in cell phones. Although it was better to use up your flashlight battery than to use up your cell phone battery and not be able to call the police if you had to.
Hoseok used the tip of the flashlight to push the door open, It creaked until it hit the wall. The first thing he saw was a large living room, with two old sofas and the upholstery torn apart, a coffee table in front of it with shattered glass strewn across the floor. There was a fireplace across the room, beer bottles crammed into it, and there was also a staircase that led to the other floor of the house. Walking around, following Hoseok, you could see condom wrappers and used condoms scattered on the floor. And couldn't help but notice the strong smell of urine.
"This place is disgusting, ugh!" You complained, covering your mouth and nose with the sleeve of your sweatshirt.
"Let's take a look up there, maybe it's better than down here." Hoseok commented, walking towards the stairs, and you followed him, even knowing that in a dilapidated house like that, the floor could give way under your feet at any moment. Upstairs, there were three rooms on the left side of the hallway and one on the right, at the very end. . Only the door on the right side was closed, while the others were wide open. Those rooms were bedrooms and everything was like downstairs, dirty, with destroyed furniture, and with boards on the windows, there were broken bottles everywhere and used condoms on the floor. "This place is perfect for catching seven different types of diseases. When we get out of here we're going to have to burn our clothes and shower with disinfectant and alcohol.”
“Agreed.” Hoseok turned to you, shining the flashlight into your face, causing you to frown and use your hand to block the excessive light that was in your eyes. “Hey, what are you doing?”
"Did you just agree with me?"
"Yes, can't I?"
Hoseok raised his eyebrows but didn't say anything, despite being curious, he decided not to follow his curiosity and just turned the other way, heading towards the door at the end of the hall, it l led to a bathroom and surprisingly it was the cleanest place in the entire house. And even though it was still dusty and the sink was inside the bathtub, it was still the only place in the house you could sit on the floor, without risking touching someone's sperm or urine.
"Well, I think this is the only suitable place for us to spend the night." Hoseok said bending down, he supported the backpack on his thigh, and pulled out a blanket, unfolding it and placing it on the floor. He also took a bottle of vodka and a juice box out of his backpack, making you wonder why he was carrying those things.
"Why do you carry this stuff?" The boy looked up at you for a second before opening the bottle of vodka and taking a sip. He then extended the bottle towards you, who raised an eyebrow, there wasn't much to do there, so drinking would be your only source of entertainment. Shrugging you reached for the vodka and took a sip, grimacing as you felt the drink burning down your throat. Hoseok laughed and handed you the juice box, feeling much better after drinking it.
"I like to be prepared for any kind of situation. I can get drunk anywhere, and I can get drunk and sleep anywhere." And he smiled, patting the floor beside him, signaling you to sit next to him, and again without many options, you did, leaning against the wall and sharing the bottle of liquor with him;
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Two hours had passed and the bottle of liquor was almost half full, you and Hoseok should have had half a dozen fits of laughter while drinking and talking, you had never been together this long without insulting each other or talking, and that made you curious, he actually seemed like a nice guy, so why the hell did you guys hate each other?
"Why you hate me?" You asked amid laughter, causing Hoseok who was catching his breath from his last laugh to look at you before letting out a dry laugh.
“You tell me, preppy girl, why do you think I hate you so much?”
“I have no idea.” You shrugged. "It's just that every time you look at me, I feel like your gaze will penetrate my soul or something. And you always pay so much attention to my girlfriends, but never to me." You giggled, feeling your face numb. "Fuck, my cheeks are numb."
"I don't pay attention to your friends, they chase me up and down, god, I've never seen girls as clingy as they are. It gives me the chills." Hoseok bent one leg and rested one arm on his knee, while leaving the other stretched out and leaning his head against the wall, facing the bathroom ceiling. "And I don't know why you're friends with them, they're not good company, I've seen them badmouthing you to other guys." And so he looked at you, seeing you curiously, with your mouth slightly open and eyes fixed on him. "Even for me."
"They don't do that."
"Yes they do." He laughed. "Don't be innocent, when I asked them if you were single, they told me yes, but that you would have no interest in me, and that you thought I was a junkie with no future."
"I never said that." Your voice came out louder than it should have and you instantly covered your mouth with both hands, starting to laugh, just like him. "I never said that." You whispered, turning around and crossing your legs, facing him. "Actually I think you're very talented, I went to Tequilas on Friday to see your performance and look, you're the best Rapper I've ever met."
He frowned, and because of the alcohol you didn't realize how much his eyes lit up to hear that you had watched his performance and that you liked it.
"You were there?"
"Yeah, I went with the girls, but I left before them as they told me that after the show they would meet with you and have a threesome."
“What?”
“Threesome, ya know, when three people...”
“I know what it is, babe, I'm referring to what they said. I didn't do any of that with them, I can use drugs sometimes but I never forget what I do and I don't usually do stupid things.” And he looked angry. "What other lies were those girls telling you?"
"I don't know… They talk a lot about you." You said thoughtfully, it was only then that it dawned on you that he had called you babe. "Did you just call me babe?"
"Yes babe, but stay focused, what else do these girls say about me?"
"Hmm, well they say you prefer naughty girls, said you hate the quiet ones, that they've had sex with you in several places and that you fuck really good."
“Oh, I do fuck really good but I don’t know how the hell would they know ‘cause I've never had sex with any of them.”
“And they said you said that I'm weird... and gross.” Hoseok's eyes widened and he watched you lower your head for a few seconds before lifting his chin and looking at him again, giving a wan smile. "And that's ok, everyone has the right to have their opinions..." And before you could continue, Hoseok took his hand on the back of your neck and pulled you all at once towards him, your lips collapsing in a violent kiss, where he stuck his tongue in your mouth, leaving you gasping for air. You were forced to unfold your legs and get on your knees as every second he pulled you closer and closer to him, your hands going to his hair, your fingers fulfilling a dream. And when he pulled his lips away, both with deep breaths and racing hearts, he looked into your eyes, again that look that seemed to penetrate your soul making you shiver.
"I don't think you're gross. I think you're the most wonderful, hottest woman in this town. And if every time I look at you, you feel that my gaze is penetrating you, it's because the thing I want most in this world since I laid eyes on you is to fuck you until I come inside you and make you come so hard around my dick that you would forget about any other man that had passed in your life.” And he gave you a peck, a long, hot peck. "I never even touched any of those girls, I just wanted you, I just want you." And he kissed you again, your will matching his at such a rapid rate that the next thing you knew, you were sitting on his lap, his hands squeezing your ass as your nails scratched the back of his neck. "And I don't mind if you're a quiet one, I can make you go pretty loud."
"I've never had sex under the influence of alcohol, that's weird." You chuckled between kisses. He grinned.
"What's weird?"
"The urge I have to just take these pants off and jump on your dick."
"You can do that if you want." He whispered, kissing down to her neck.
"Not here, there are already a lot of condoms scattered around this house."
"Then let's go elsewhere."
"But what about the bet?"
"Fuck this stupid bet, I just want you all over me."
You got up, staggered back, but leaned against the wall to keep from falling, laughing silly. Hoseok gathered all his things and turned on the flashlight once more, leaving the room. He waited for you to follow him and extended his hand towards you, this time you not only intertwined your fingers with his, but also grabbed his arm with your other hand, leaning on him, feeling as if your legs were jelly. Laughing as you went down the stairs, you were much more comfortable with the whole situation, no longer frightened by the creaks coming from the forest. Once again when you reached the fallen tree, Hoseok grabbed you around the waist, helping you to jump over it. Running clumsily towards the car, he unlocked the car alarm and you climbed into the backseat, undressing. The guy tossed his backpack into the driver's seat before ducking in front of the back door and looking at you. His eyes roaming every inch of your body until you were completely naked.
“Someone's eager”
“Aren’t you?” You whispered, slowly spreading your legs giving him a wide view of what he wanted most. Hoseok licked his lips and started to undress outside the car, being tall he wouldn't be able to do it in the car as quickly as he wanted, throwing his clothes on the front seats. And when he finished taking off his pants, he found a packet of condoms in his pocket, getting into his car and slamming the door behind him. Breathing so heavy he could feel his lungs working. With one knee propped up on the bench while he wore the condom, you fingered your wet space, his eyes alternating between down there and into your eyes. You then grabbed his waist, pulling him towards you. Hoseok rested his right hand on the back seat and his left hand on the passenger seat as he positioned himself, hovering over you.
And he swore as he started to get in, feeling you tighten around him, pulsing, your moans echoing throughout the car, invading his ears, making him roll his eyes and with one hand hold your neck. He started slowly, moving his hips slowly, eyes glued to your face, watching the pleasure wash over you, your lips parted, sometimes biting your lips, frowning. He also watched as you gripped the edges of the seat, your fingers sinking into the upholstery, your legs up, curling your toes, your chest pounding, your nipples hard, your body tingling, god, and it was all because of him. It was all because of his thick dick going in and out of you, hard as a rock, stretching your walls, touching your weak spots, it was all about that slim, beautiful, drawn body. It was all because of that face, those eyes upon you, the pleasure that had spread across that long, thin face. Hoseok was more than a man, he was a work of art, a piece of paradise, the male version of Aphrodite. A god who should be treated well, venerated. And you were sure you would do anything for him. You never hated him, it was all lust, desire.
"What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" His voice was low, lustful and inquisitive, using his thumb to caress your parted lip.
“Only you.” You whispered back, licking his thumb before taking it in your mouth. He let out a low growl, lowering his body and taking your lips in a slow kiss that turned into a fiery kiss as he increased the speed at which his hips moved, bumping against yours, the noise certainly echoed out of that car, onto that deserted street where nothing but the wind could be heard. Your voice was muffled by his mouth, but as soon as he pulled away, kissing your chest until he was sucking on your nipple, you threw your head back, slamming it against the door, your moans getting louder and louder, following the force with which he thrust. “Fuck. It feels so good.” He didn't say anything, just bit your nipple, bringing his hands to your waist, moving your hips against his so easily it was as if he controlled you body with the power of his mind. And when the first orgasm came, so suddenly, you screamed, arching your back as he continued to move, feeling you tighten around him, your pussy so wet it dripped onto the seat, wetting the leather. Hoseok hugged your body, he sat down bringing you onto his lap, burying his face in your hair as you calmed down a little, your body shaking.
"Are you okay?"
"Fuck way more than okay." You laughed, your hips starting to move involuntarily, your body burning with arousal, his cock was buried so deep inside you that you didn't know how long it would be until you were coming again. You leaned your body back, using your arms to lean on the two seats in front, wiggling your hips as you went up and down, the guy let his head fall back, eyes on you, on how your breasts swayed, at how your body danced on top of him. He licked his fingers, and while one hand went towards your breast, pinching your nipple, the other went down to your pussy, and he didn't even need to wet his fingers, as what he found down there was a puddle of water, his fingers sliding in circles over your clit. Your sly moans no longer had control, as well as your body that while riding him, was rubbing against his fingers, needing more contact, needing to release that tension. “Shit i’m com...” And you barely managed to finish your sentence, screaming as you felt your core tighten and release all at once, your body going limp, squeezing your toes and closing your eyes tightly. Hoseok held your waist, pulling your body to him again, hugging you and stroking your hair while laughing with satisfaction.
"Twice, baby? You're being so nice to me." He kissed your shoulder lightly. "Think you can get one more?"
“Fuck, yes.” You stated, pressing your lips to his and hugging him around the neck as you moved your hips again, this time starting faster and harder, with his hands cupping your ass and helping you to ride. "I want you to cum on me, Hoseok."
"If you keep moving like this, I will." And it was what you needed to increase the speed, this time you ran your hand behind your body, throwing your body back a little, holding the back of his neck while the other hand went down to his balls, massaging. And he swore, bringing his fingers to your clit again. “Fuck babe, you’re so good. On Monday we're going to do a blood test, and when we prove to each other that we're clean, I'm going to fuck you so hard and I'm going to come so hard inside you that you will be marked by me forever, fuck."
And the sweat was running down your body, as was his, glistening in the light that came from outside the car. You could feel him coming and you could feel that burning in your core, you were ready to come one more time and you wanted so much for him to fill you all over, until not a drop was left. You just wanted to be his. It was everything you ever wanted.
"Fuck, I'm...." And he grabbed your body, making you stop moving, his cock pulsing inside you, your walls feeling every inch of him, his fingers stimulating you, making you come again, this time not having the strength to move anymore, your body going numb. You hugged each other, your head on his shoulder and his against the seat, so tired and out of breath that you waited a good few minutes for either of you to say something. Who needed drugs to ease the pressure when Jung Hoseok was there to make her come?
"I think we should go back." You whispered, your face against his neck as he stroked your hair. "Everyone must be waiting for us to give up on the bet."
"Keep them waiting, bunch of assholes." he whispered back. "Those bitches made you think I didn't want anything to do with you when I really only wanted you. Let's go to my house, take a shower and rest so we can have a whole day of trick or treat, in my bed, of course." He laughed and you lifted your head, looking at him. "And if you want, of course. "
"This will be the best Halloween of my life."
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all rights reserved © katebacks | 2018/2022 — no reposting and/or modifying of any form on any medium is allowed. no translations allowed.
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beomgyus · 11 months
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yjbglove · 24 days
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TXT - minisode 3 TOMORROW Concept Trailer
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strawberryadegames · 2 years
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Hello !!! I’m finally working on the txt game again, so here’s some lil teasers for the game! Also I forget tumblr exists 90% of the time so I’d suggest following me on Twitter or insta!
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Also! I ordered a microphone so I’ll be able to do videos explaining the txt game more! So keep an eye out!
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jjunies · 2 years
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