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#it’s always oh this fool didn’t even get mad that i was an hour late
dittanyinbloom · 1 year
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Note Taking
Ominis Gaunt x fem!MC (there is only one gendered term in the very last line). 1.8k. No specific house. Fluff and a bit of MC embarrassing themselves.
Based on this post I made about having HoM with Ominis.
.💕✍🏻💕
“In today’s lesson, we will cover a truly thrilling event. . .,” Professor Binns had just started class, but half the students were already dozing off.
It was widely accepted that History of Magic was merely used as a free period. Whether that meant catching up on sleep or doing last minute homework for another class, one thing was certain: no one paid attention. Attendance hardly mattered since Professor Binns rarely ever engaged with the class directly. In fact, you would bet he didn’t even know a single students name or even the exact year. Everyday he floated into class, discussed whatever curriculum he felt like, then drifted off through the wall to his office at the end of the period without so much as a goodbye.
To say the least, it was no one’s favorite subject, that is, except you. Every Tuesday and Thursday, you practically skipped to your afternoon slot of History of Magic. With all the extracurriculars other professors sent you on, and the adventures you went on without their knowledge, you were elated to have time set aside for assignments and catching up on some sleep. Those horrible demiguise statues Mr. Moon asked you to find were really taking a toll on you lately.
Perhaps the most exciting part of class was that you didn’t share it with Sebastian Sallow. Now, he was a very lovely boy for helping you out on multiple excursions, but his presence could be intense at times. This could be simply fixed by spending time with your other friends. Natty, Poppy, and even Amit were great company and just as, if not even more helpful than Sebastian. But that boy had one thing drawing you back every day to meet up. .
Ominis Gaunt, Sebastian’s right hand man and arguably his moral compass. Oh, how you would spend hours practicing spells with Sebastian in the Undercroft for the smallest chance that Ominis would walk in to study, or have a chat, or sometimes even join in on the dueling. That was the only time you ever saw him without his school robes. Neatly folding up his sleeves and grinning like a mad man when he landed a blow on Sebastian, who as of late, rather deserved a few jinxes thrown his way.
History of Magic was the only class Ominis sat beside you in. It was hardly the place to make conversation since even the softest of whispers would be heard by the extremely bored students around you. Nevertheless, you were content with just sitting beside him and admiring his lazy smile as he drifted off into what was probably his fourth nap of the day.
That was one of the first odd quirks you had noticed about the boy. While you ran around the castle from one fool’s errand to the next, you often passed by Ominis lounging about on benches, windowsills, and most often the floor. Sometimes he was snacking or working on revisions, but more often than not the boy was merely napping, just out in the open, where anyone could step on him. The first few times, you had gently woken him up and offered to help him to his common room, but he always acted as though you were the strange one for not letting him sleep in the middle of a hallway in the Defense Against the Dark Arts tower.
Now whenever you saw him, you hummed in endearment and graciously covered him with your scarf as a makeshift blanket. You used to have an array of scarves, but now half of them were likely stuffed in a trunk deep in the Slytherin boys’ dormitory, never to be seen again. It was a small price to pay, in your eyes.
“Seb told me to tell you to meet us in the library after classes,” Ominis said as he leaned forward on the desk, getting in a comfortable napping position.
“Does he think you’re an owl?” You teased.
“Something about you being more likely to say yes if it comes from me.”
“I see,” you whispered, hoping he didn’t hear how flustered you had become. “So he’s scheming again?”
“You say again as if he quit to begin with.”
“Well, you know I can’t say no to an adventure.”
“Exactly why the two of you will be the death of me. Wake me up if anything crazy happens?”
Nothing ever would, at least, not while all the other students that usually caused trouble were sleeping as well. You dated your parchment for notes then began doodling to stay awake. As of late, the professors had been elated with your progress and stopped giving you so much extra work. Not much catching up needed to be done since most other students couldn’t take on a troll alone and live to tell the tale.
Your eyes wandered to study the pretty moles Ominis had scattered about his face and neck. The unhinged, love stricken part of your brain desperately wanted to draw little love hearts or flowers around them. Your fingers twitched, but you controlled your urges and drew hearts all over your notes instead. This was turning into a common occurrence. Most of your history notes contained one or two key points from Binns, a few random drawings, and many iterations of your deskmate’s name scribbled about. At the top corner of every parchment you would even write your name with his last name along with the date. And oh, how the two went so well together.
The period flies by while you daydream of holding Ominis’ hand or kissing his beauty marks as the two of you part ways. The sound of students scuffing their chairs in the worn wood flooring brings you back to reality. You tap Ominis on the shoulder. For a moment your hand lingers, drifting between his shoulder blades.
“Ominis, class has ended.”
“Already?” His voice was almost a whine which was strange because most students jumped at the opportunity to leave history class.
“Don’t sound too disappointed. Binns might offer to go on for another hour if he knows a student is willing to stay.”
You had one more class before meeting the boys in the library. Sebastian seemed to be awaiting your arrival, spotting you the moment you walked in, and waving you up to join them on the second floor. As you greeted them, you set your scarf and robes on the back of the chair.
“You really do need to come by our room and grab your scarves,” Sebastian commented. “They’re taking over.”
“Hmm, yes. I am missing quite a few at this point.”
The culprit, though it wasn’t entirely his fault since you were the one always covering up his sleeping form, went pink at the mention of scarves. Despite looking as though he wanted to add to the conversation, he quickly went back to writing the twelve inches for Sharp’s latest assignment.
“So, Sallow, why have you dragged me here today? Are we going treasure hunting again?”
“Sorry, little adventurer, today’s request is rather boring in comparison. Thought it would be a good time to start revising for O.W.L.s, and I need help in History of Magic. I’ve managed to fall asleep every single period since the start of term. . Quite impressive if you ask me.”
“Don’t know why you thought to ask me. I hardly pay attention in that class.”
Sebastian tilted his head to the side, frowning in confusion. “But, Ominis said he can hear you writing notes all period.”
Your eyes flicker to Ominis almost in a look of betrayal. He seemed as focused as ever on writing, either exuding an excellent poker face or genuinely not showing any interest in being mentioned by Sebastian. Quickly, you swallowed down your own emotions and insisted, “Well, sorry. My notes for that class are very scattered. I mostly just draw to keep myself awake.”
“Anything would help. I honestly don’t even know what we’re meant to be learning about. Nellie heard there might be a quiz next week. My uncle can not hear about my grades slipping on top of everything else.”
Seeing the innocent look of terror on Sebastian’s face made you melt a bit. In his defense, he didn’t know you made a fool of yourself by doodling his best friends name across your parchment twice a week. He was just asking for notes, which was something the three of you often shared.
“I can. . read them to you?” You compromised.
Both boys gave you an odd look, but Sebastian agreed without much hesitation given how desperate he was.
“Suppose I should be writing this down too, if there really is a quiz coming up,” Ominis said with a grimace.
You unrolled your parchment and began to read. Both boys studiously jotted down every word. Hopefully you were explaining everything accurately. There were clearly periods in your notes where you had dozed off between key moments, but unless Binns was looking for his exact wording on the quiz, the three of should should be able to pass.
“It’s with an ‘A’, Grimbald, not Grimbold,” Ominis said out of the blue.
“Thanks,” Sebastian muttered as he went back to add a flick of ink to his ‘O’. He seemed unbothered but Ominis’ correction. You, however, were too tongue-tied to continue reading. Sebastian frowned at the silence and finally looked up at you. “Is there not more?”
“How. . ?”
“Oh!” Realizing your confusion, Sebastian was quick and rather proud to explain his best mate’s ability, “Ominis can hear the letters, or, dunno really. You explain it better, Ominis.”
Suddenly, Ominis went ridged like he had been caught in an act. “When the room is quiet enough, I can pick out the sounds of a quill or chalk on the board. Letters all have a distinct cadence to them. Some sound too similar to be distinct like ‘b’, ‘d’, and ‘p’, but I can make an educated guess.”
“So you can hear what people are writing?”
“Precisely!” Sebastian spoke up with a wide smile. “Brilliant, isn’t it?“
“It is. . quite the talent, Ominis.”
“Thank you.”
You cleared your throat and went on with the lesson. Just because Ominis knew Sebastian’s penmanship did not mean he had your memorized, or that he even listened in the first place. After all, he slept through every class, and you weren’t bold enough to write his name in such a way while he was awake.
Still, knowing of his ability left you wary. The next time you sat with Ominis in history class, you were meticulous with your note taking. No doodles, no love hearts, no childish name writing. Those days were over. They had to be because if Ominis somehow didn’t already know about your embarrassing crush, you were not going to give him the opportunity to find out.
This time when you wrote your name and the date at the top of the parchment, you used your own last name. After that was finished, you moved on to title it “The Goblin Rebellion of 1752”, but you hadn’t gotten past “The” when a hand landed on your knee.
Warmth spread across your thigh while chilling nerves sprinkled down your spine. You nearly fell out of your chair at the touch, causing Ominis to squeeze down harder, keeping you firmly in your seat.
“Ominis?”
He almost seemed angry, but he kept his voice a low whisper for only you to hear, “What do you think you are doing, Mrs. Gaunt? Title your notes appropriately.”
~You can find part two here~
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obae-me · 1 year
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The Demons Inside - Part 4
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Masterlist 
Part 1 (Lucifer)     Part 2 (Mammon)    Part 3 (Levi)
Description: Satan’s part of the request  “The brothers reacting to an MC crying suddenly in front of them and then trying to act as if nothing happened”
Word Count: 2152
Warning: This segment mentions bullying. As Always, Read Safely. 
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“No, of course I don’t.” Satan rolled his eyes a bit at the thought, moving on with his in-depth conversation with another fellow book-lover. They both stood in the halls, standing by one of the many arched windows that looked down into one of RAD’s courtyards. “Of course, the plot had promise, but the ending was terrible. You can’t build this amazing world only to rip it out from under the reader and say it was all a lie. It’s a cheap and unimaginative tactic by writers to fix their loopholes by claiming the rules don’t matter since they didn't exist in the first place.” He could talk about this for hours, and although he sounded frustrated, he was fully enjoying himself. Sometimes there’s a certain kind of pleasure in finding something to hate. 
Speaking of hate, a certain raucous noise down the hall behind him was driving him mad. That hate wasn’t very pleasurable. He was trying to have a cleverly held debate about a popular piece of literature, why can’t he have this in peace? However, he simply ignored it, keeping that irritation in anger held deep within him. Nothing he couldn’t control. 
Then there was laughter followed by some shouting. Nothing unusual in a school of demons. Satan just pushed it aside, preparing to talk about the importance of following through with one’s motifs. Then the demon Satan was having this discussion with looked off to the side, their eyes following something. “Isn’t that the human staying with you?” They asked. 
Satan’s head quickly whipped around, able to catch them running down the hall past him, trying to hide the tears streaming down their cheeks as they ducked into the nearest empty classroom, the door slamming shut. Satan glared down the hall, but the demons that he thought had been there earlier were gone. “We’ll continue this at a later time, yeah?” With a raised palm, he parted ways with his fellow bibliophile and headed towards where MC had run off to. He grabbed the door and attempted to open it. They had locked it. Rattling the door violently didn’t seem to do any good either. He really didn’t need to get in trouble breaking a door down but…Just as soon as he threw all his weight into his shoulder to break the door down, of course it swung open. He stumbled, almost falling but feeling two arms supporting him, keeping him from making a complete fool of himself at least. 
“Whoa, where’s the fire at huh?” 
Satan regained his footing, straightening himself to look MC curiously. They weren’t crying. In fact, they had an amused smile on their face. If he didn’t have full confidence in his memory he probably would’ve assumed nothing was wrong. MC did have a redness to their eyes. “What’s going on?” 
They frowned a bit, giving a shrug. “What do you mean?” 
“You ran in here crying and locked yourself in.” Satan couldn’t help but scowl a little, but it was out of concern. 
Throughout the building, a low haunting bell could be heard thrumming through the hallways. “Oh no, I’m going to be late for my next class,” they fretted, ignoring Satan’s statement completely. “I gotta go, I’ll see you later!” 
“MC!” He called, but they were already gone, dashing to their next subject before he could stop them. Normally he would pursue something like this…but perhaps he’d bring it up again at home where they might feel safe enough to answer honestly. Maybe it wasn’t even that serious…but Satan had a bad feeling forming in the back of his mind…
***
Satan hadn't seen them for the rest of the day. Didn't pass them in the halls, didn't see them walk home, and didn't even see them at dinner that night. None of his brothers had seen them either, all suddenly worried about the human when Satan asked. No one had seen anything out of the ordinary. MC was likely in their room. He'd have to go check on them, both for curiosity's sake and just for peace of mind. 
Towards the end of the night, he came across their door. Before he knocked, he could’ve sworn he heard more sniffling coming from inside the closed room. Something deep within him started to burn, but he didn’t want to assume anything, even though he had his suspicions that something had happened at RAD and someone else was to blame for MC feeling this way. “Don’t react till you have the facts,” Satan whispered to himself, taking a breath and knocking calmly on MC’s door. Of course, the sound inside stopped, light footsteps approaching before the door swung open. Once more, Satan was a little frustrated to see that they appeared fine, grinning at the sight of him. 
“What’s up?” They asked. 
“Can I come in?” MC hesitated for a moment at his request, but eventually moved aside to let him in. Satan felt a bit of relief. He was trusted enough for this at least. He found a spot to sit, waiting for MC to shut the door. “I wanted to ask you something.” 
He could see it in their eyes, a little bit of fear and disappointment, but they simply hummed, sitting on their bed. “Sure, what is it?” 
Wondering what better angle to approach this at, he gave himself a moment to think. Just a general question, nothing accusatory or demanding. He knew from learning about mysteries and interrogations that everyone does want to talk, so it’s best to ask questions that allow them to share information on their own terms. “I wanted to know how school was for you today. Did you make it to your class on time?” 
The human looked away from him, a frown flickering over their face. “It was alright. I was a few minutes late. The professor wasn’t happy but didn’t say anything about it.” 
Simple and fairly straightforward answers, alright…What else to ask? Perhaps a suggestion. “If you want I can accompany you to class to make sure you’re not late.”
That seemed to strike a chord. They quickly shook their head, denying his suggestion too quickly to be normal. “No, it’s alright. I just lost track of time today. It’s not usually a problem.” 
Time to press! “Something distracted you?” Hopefully that wasn’t too obvious. He didn’t want them to shut down completely. 
All of a sudden, he felt a wave of irritation from them. They folded their arms, the body language one usually uses when they block themselves off from others. “Can you just get to the point of why you’re here? I know what it’s like when you start to interrogate me. I’m not a suspect in one of your crime novels.” 
Satan did feel a bit of guilt at that. He didn’t mean it to come off that way, he was simply trying to use what he knew in books to communicate correctly. But he supposed MC was right. This wasn’t a book. “I want to know what happened today. Why were you crying?” 
They shrugged, one of their hands gripping the fabric of their sleeve tightly, protectively. “It was nothing. Why are you so worried about it?” 
Satan slowly got to his feet. “Because it’s not normal. You usually don’t have a problem talking to me, which makes me even more suspicious that something is wrong.” He took a few steps towards them calmly, going to put a supportive hand on their shoulder. “Talk to-” As soon as his hand rested on them, they flinched, face squeezing into a wince as they pulled back from him. A jolt ran through him. No, please. Had he really hurt them? He cursed, quickly apologizing as he sat on the bed beside them. “Can I take a look at it? I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” 
At hearing those words, MC stared at him, eyes turning glossy. They placed their face in their hands as they began to cry again. “You didn’t do anything,” they responded between their sobs. “It wasn’t you.” 
Satan wasn’t sure what was worse, the idea that he accidently hurt him, or the realization that his theory was right, and someone else purposefully did. “Can I see?” He asked again, refraining from doing anything till he got confirmation. They nodded, and with a gentle hand, he pushed back a little bit of the fabric around their shoulder. A bruise had formed, an ugly darkened blotch. Who did it? Who did it? Who did it? His mind was racing, but he kept it together. “Why didn’t you say anything?” 
“Because I didn’t want to.” 
He was struggling to hold onto his anger. “Why not? If you told me, I could’ve taken care of it for you! Doesn’t it make you angry?” 
“I’m furious!” They suddenly shouted, raising their head, their puffy eyes filled with burning rage as well as tears. “That’s the problem! I’m so…” They were shaking, their mind abuzz with emotion. “So mad. Mad at those demons for pushing me around like we’re back in freaking middle school, mad at the professor who saw it who told me to ‘not provoke them or risk making things worse’, but mostly mad at myself! Every time I want to say something, I get so upset my mind goes blank! I want to punch them! I want to scream!” They clutched their head like they were in pain, which they were. He knew all too well what that pain was like. He should’ve known. He should’ve seen it. 
“Then scream.” As they looked at him a bit blankly, he reached around them to grab their pillow, placing it in their hands. He swallowed his own emotional lump in his throat to scoot closer to them, putting his hand on their back. “As loud as you can. Go for it.” 
They seemed doubtful for a moment, probably never having the opportunity to do something like this before, having to keep it all together. Then they raised the pillow to their face, screaming so loudly their voice was cracking, their feet stomping into the floor and one of their hands pounding at their knees as everything that had been building up was released in one explosion. When it was over, Satan rubbed circles between their shoulder blades, reminding them to breathe. Last thing they needed right now was to pass out. They then let their cushion fall to the floor, visibly exhausted. Numbed. 
“Feel any better?” He wondered. 
“Now I just have a headache,” they wheezed, pressing a palm to their forehead. 
“That usually happens, yeah.” He sympathized, wishing he could simply take their anger from them. “How long has this been happening?” 
They brought their hands in their lap, touching the pads of their fingers and their palms as a sort of distraction. “Just a few days. It’s mostly just been taunting. I didn’t tell anyone because…I wanted to take care of it myself. You always handle things so eloquently…I wanted to do that.” They took a shuddering breath. “I came up with so many different things to say, so many smart comebacks, but when it came down to it, I couldn’t say those things at all. I was just so…angry. Today I finally lost it, told one of the demons to shove it…so they decided to shove me…I wanted to prove so badly that I’m not just this weak and stupid human.” 
“You’re not,” Satan announced sternly, but then addressed them softly. “Look at me.” They turned their head and he cupped their face in his hands, drying off the spots that were still damp with his thumbs. “You’re not weak or stupid. I’ve had centuries learning how to handle my wrath. Centuries. And still sometimes I go speechless with anger. Does that make me stupid?” He waited till they shook their head. “Am I weak just because I don’t punch anyone who makes me angry?” Again, he waited till they silently responded. “Exactly.” He allowed his touch to fall, hoping they were taking his words to heart. “Talking to someone is always the hardest part.” He spoke from experience, still someone who struggled to open up to others. “And I’m not saying your anger isn’t valid, because it is. You deserve to be angry, every bit of it.” 
“So what do I do about it?” 
“Well, the first part is done. You talked to me about it.” He rested his hand on the bed beside him, MC’s hand brushing up against it. “Now we can figure the next part out together. I won’t make you take the high road, but if you want to forgive and forget, you can, and I’ll make sure they stop messing with you…but if you want to know what I would do, I can help you make a plan. I’ll teach you how to cleverly ensure people never make you angry again.”
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crimson-calligraphyx · 9 months
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A/N: I know y’all are probably thinking “why does she like sambuca but not anisette cookies??? Aren’t they the same???” Yes, but I’m basing it off myself bc I’m weird and love sambuca, but not those cookies 💀
"Thank you for this," I sigh, relishing the feel of Noah's fingers massaging into the back of my head. I found myself smiling as he ran his hand along the length of my hair, sending a tingle down my spine when he plays with a strand of it. "No need to thank me, Liv. I just want you to get the rest you deserve since you’ve been working so many hours," he replies, sincerity heavy in his voice.
Tears start to fill my eyes, partly from the affection that I had missed and partly from the regret of pushing him away for as long as I had. I pick my head up to look at him, and seeing my favorite smile on his face caused my heart to swell. His smile falls into a smirk as he pads his thumb across my cheek, surely wiping at the red stain from the frosting, and I laugh from our earlier interaction.
He starts to guide my face towards him, and I sit up to close the gap between us. Our mouths connect; I couldn't help the immediate smile that formed on my lips as I began to fill with elation. I grasp onto his shirt, lying back against the cushions with him on top of me, my leg wrapping around his side comfortably. I just wanted him as close to me as he could get; I selfishly wanted to drink every last bit of him that I had missed due to my foolish actions.
I feel my heart flutter when Noah rests his forehead against mine and continues to glide his thumb over my cheek delicately. His eyes glistened under the orange hues as he gazed at me with such adoration, embracing me as if I would float away if he let go. "I've missed you," he says softly. I flash him an apologetic smile, and I feel myself start to deflate from the guilt of how much distance I've put between us as of late. "I know, and I'm sorry. I just...I don't know what I was thinking," I huffed out a dry laugh.
His face drops, and he loosens his hold on me as he stops caressing my cheek. I furrow my brows at him, opening my mouth to ask him what was wrong, but he asks me his own question first, jerking his face away from mine. "Liv, have you been drinking?”
Fuck. My heart sinks to the pit of my stomach, and suddenly I feel like I can't breathe as the fear starts to settle in, unsure of where this would go.
"No, why would you think that?" I countered quickly, knowing I would hate myself later for lying to him. "I can smell Sambuca on your breath, Olivia." "Oh,” I muttered, racking my brain for a way to cover it up. “I had an anisette cookie before leaving the bakery," I tried my best to delude him with a chuckle, but he was no fool. He knew that I was lying.
He shakes his head at me and pushes himself away, sitting at the far end of the couch with anger radiating from him. I could see it by the way he composed himself; his mouth was pressed into a fine line while his jaw ticked, looking straight ahead. "You don't even like those enough to sell them at your bakery," he says dully.
Of course, out of all the things to remember, he remembers that minor detail.
“Noah, I-I’m sorry,” I say as I sit up, my heart pounding with apprehension. “Please don’t be upset with me.” He closes his eyes and shakes his head. “I’m not upset that you had a drink,” he finally says, turning his attention towards me. I let out the breath that I didn’t know I was holding, relieved he wasn’t mad. “I’m upset that you just lied to me, Olivia. Slipping up is one thing, you know I’d be there to help you through that. But lying about it?”
As quickly as the relief came, it vanished—my chest tightens and my throat starts to burn from holding back my cries, ashamed of my behavior. He was right, there was no reason to lie to him.
“Is that why you’ve been so distant lately? Always asleep when I get home, so I don’t notice the alcohol on your breath?” His face was filled with sorrow; I could see it in his eyes, hear it in his voice how much this pained him. My lips quiver, and I let out a sob, letting the tears roll down my face. “I’m sorry,” I whimpered. “Why, Liv?” he whispers. “You were doing so well; you were sober for over three years.” “Because…” I looked down at my hands, absentmindedly playing with my wedding ring as I tried to figure out a way to explain why I’ve been drinking. “Because drinking helped the loneliness that I was feeling. It comforted me when no one else was here.” “Olivia, you know I’m always here—”
“No!” I shouted and stood up abruptly, throwing my arms out. “You’re not always here! You’re always in the goddamn studio.” “You know that’s not true,” he stands up, reaching for me, but I take a step back. “Olivia, come on.” I shake my head at him, tears still streaming down my face. “How many dates have you forgotten? How often do you help out around the house, huh?” I watch as realization crosses his features, and he drops his arms at his sides in defeat with a huff. “Exactly,” I spit, walking past him to head to the bedroom.
He catches my wrist, and he spins me back around, tugging me against him. He wraps his arms around me, cradling my head against his chest. “Olivia, I’m so sorry,” he whispers, kneading his fingers in my hair. He just holds me, allowing me to breathe in the cedar wood aroma I’ve missed so much, to hear the heartbeat that would lull me to sleep every night. As hard as I tried to stand my ground, how hard I tried to convince myself to push away, I couldn’t—I cracked and clung onto his shirt as I sobbed into his chest.
“Shh, it’s okay, Olivia,” he murmurs, “you’re okay. We’re okay.” I rolled my head against his chest as a way to tell him ‘no’, too distraught to get any words out. I wasn’t okay, we weren’t okay. “I’m so sorry, Liv. I’ll do better, I promise,” he says, and presses a firm kiss to the top of my head.
I wanted his words to comfort me, but with how many times he’s given me unfulfilled promises, it didn’t—I couldn’t believe him, and that’s what killed me.  
-
Noah and I had gone to bed together for the first time in weeks; he never let go of me as I cried against his chest, rubbing my back, and kissing my head until I fell asleep. When I woke up, he wasn't in bed, and it did disappoint me even though I didn’t have the right to feel that way since I was the one doing that to him for so long.
I made my way into the kitchen, squinting as the sunlight made my head throb more so than it already was from crying last night. Noah was standing by the stove in nothing but a pair of sweats, whisking away at something in a pot. A tiny smile forms on my lips as I watched his tattoos seemingly change shape, the light dancing over his skin from the way his muscles moved—this was how our mornings used to be when we first got married, and I missed it dearly.
I step closer to him, and he turns towards me when he senses my presence, brandishing a gentle smile with a kind nod of his head. "Good morning, love," he greets me as he continued flicking his wrist to stir the pot. "Good morning," I sidle up beside him, rubbing slow circles in the small of his back as I peered at what he was doing. "What are you making?" "Eggs benedict," he says cheerfully. "With a side of fresh fruit because it 'makes up for how fattening the benedict is'," he finishes with a low chuckle.
I found myself grinning wide and wrapped my arms around him, giggling. He puts what I now knew was hollandaise sauce aside and drapes an arm over my shoulders to pull me against him, kissing my head. “I never forgot when you first told me that. It was too cute,” he mumbles against my hair with another chuckle. “It’s almost done, make yourself comfortable and I’ll bring it over to you.” I pull away from him and stand on my toes to give him a quick kiss before taking a seat at the kitchen island.
I rested my chin in my hand, propped up with my elbow as I watched him continue cooking, a smile grazing my lips. He was always so graceful when he cooked, his movements so fluid, never skipping a beat as he finished everything at the same time—must've been the musician in him.
He places the benedict in front of me and a cup of pineapples, grapes, and strawberries, followed by a fresh cup of coffee. I smiled up at him and thanked him as he presses his lips firmly against my forehead before sitting across from me. "You're not eating?" I asked, noting the lack of a plate in front of him. "No, I made this specifically for you," he flashes me a gentle smile. "Besides, I already had my toast and oatmeal." I let out a light chuckle, cutting into my breakfast. "Well, thank you, but you didn't have to do all this for me." I took a bite, and I immediately let out a satisfied groan; I haven't had eggs benedict in ages, and he knew how to make it perfectly. "On second thought, maybe you did." We both shared a laugh.
"So, what do you want to do today?" Noah asks after a moment of me eating in comfortable silence. I pushed the fruit around with my fork, frowning slightly knowing that I had to head to the bakery at some point. "As much as I'm enjoying breakfast with you, I have to head into work soon." "Nope, that's been taken care of," he counters matter-of-factly, and I look up at him with curiosity. "We're spending the day together. Whatever you want to do." I shake my head at him in dismissal, "Noah, I can't. I have to close tonight—" "I told you; it's been taken care of." He reaches out and takes my hand in his, giving me a firm squeeze, "So, I'll ask again: what do you wanna do today?"
I gazed into his chocolatey brown eyes that were filled with candor, and I couldn't help but tear up from the bliss I felt from it. He was trying, and that meant the world to me. I blink the tears away and squeeze his hand in return, "I just want to spend a relaxing day with my husband, that is all." He leans forward while bringing my hand closer to him and kisses my knuckles one by one, "Good, because I was hoping to do the same with my wife."
After I had finished eating, with him stealing several pieces of my fruit cup, he excused himself for a moment. I took the time to clear away the dishes, rinsing them and putting them in the dishwasher. Even if the kitchen was left a little messy, he did put a lot of effort into making breakfast for me, so I brushed it aside.
I hear his feet pad across the linoleum moments later, turning to see him beckoning me to follow him. I set the last plate into the dishwasher before making my way over to him, and he brings me through our bedroom and into our bathroom—I'm immediately slapped in the face with the scent of patchouli and vanilla.
The room was dim, the glow of candles being the only source of light, cascading shadows across the tiles, and what appeared to be rose petals danced in the ripples while the bathtub slowly filled up. I turned to him with my jaw practically on the floor, astonished. "When did you get the time to do all of this? The rose petals?" His lips curl up at the corners, eyes heavily lidded with affection as he cups my face in his hands. "That doesn't matter," he says in a low voice. "What matters is you," he pecks my nose, "and making you feel good. Take as long as you need, love." He moves his hands down my shoulders, rubbing them gently before he turns to make his way out.
"Wait," I called out and wrapped my hand around his wrist, lightly tugging him back. "Could you...join me?" I asked bashfully as he turned towards me. "Of course, I can," he grins. I let go of his wrist, turning to shut the faucet off and tie my hair up before stripping out of my sleepwear. By the time I was situated to enter the bath, Noah was already sitting in it, submerged up to his chest. He holds his hand out, which I take in mine, and he steadies me as I stepped over the side of the tub. He patiently waits for me to lower myself in while my body slowly acclimated to the temperature.
I settled between his legs, sighing once I got comfortable against his chest, my head rising and falling in time with his breathing. He wraps his arms around my waist, holding me securely against him, and my eyes flutter shut from the tranquility all around—the stillness, the ambiance, the aroma that eased my body with each breath that I took.
Noah takes a hand away from my midsection, running it through the water before trailing it from my shoulder and down my upper arm. I felt the silkiness from the rose petals caress my skin, goosebumps rising to the surface from his graceful touch. He presses a kiss to the back of my head, and I hum. I haven't felt this relaxed in ages, and I was more than grateful of him for running this bath for me and joining me.
"I love you, Olivia," he whispers, now using both hands to run the suds down my arms. "I love you, too, Noah. I'm sorry—" "Shh," he hushes me, "no apologies. You have nothing to be sorry for, I do. I didn't realize how spending so much time on the album would negatively affect you, and for that I am sorry. It caused you to relapse after three years, and I'll never forgive myself for that." I sat up to look back at him, shaking my head. "But I'm the one who isolated myself when I should've just gone to you instead."
"You were hurting," he simply says, his hands now on my traps, rolling his thumbs into the very much tense muscles. "Lean forward," he tells me gently, and I oblige. "I should've noticed sooner; I should've done something about this sooner that could've prevented you from having a drink. Which I'm not upset about, Liv, please understand that." Grimacing, I groan when he presses into a knot, tears springing to my eyes. "Fuck, that hurts," I mumble. "I know, I'm sorry. I don't mean to hurt you," he apologizes, easing up on my shoulders.
Even though I knew that he meant physically at this very moment, his words struck me in the chest. Maybe it was a combination of his words and the ache in my shoulders, but my lips were suddenly quivering, and the tears began to roll down my cheeks. I tried to hold back my cries, my body trembling in his hands. "Let it out, Liv," he whispers, tracing slow circles in my upper back, and I broke. I was full on sobbing, covering my face with my hands to stifle my wails in the quiet bathroom.
He puts his arms around me and pulls me back against his chest, moving us side to side in what little room the tub would allow. He kisses my head, runs a hand down my face soothingly and wiped the tears away over and over while I cried it out. It seemed like an eternity before I'm able to stop, but I was heaving, trying to catch my breath desperately from how hard I had cried.
I turn in his grasp to the best of my ability so I can look at him; he flashes me a saddened smile before kissing my forehead. "I-I'm sorry," I stuttered, placing my hand on his chest, trying to cling onto his shirt that obviously wasn't there. "For what, love?" he rests his hand on top of mine, giving it a gentle squeeze. "F-for crying, for drinking, for e-everything." He shakes his head in dismissal, "In sickness and in health, right?" I nodded, sniffling. "Til death do us part, right?" "Y-yeah," I whimpered. "We've got a long way to go then, Liv. I'll be right there with you, every step of the way." He flashes me my favorite smile, the one where his eyes shimmer and crinkle at the outer corners. The one that he brandished on our wedding day, the one that radiated into me and warmed me on the inside out. The one I never wanted to stop seeing, ever.
He sealed his promise with a kiss, and I knew that we would work this out. I knew that everything would be okay.
|Chapter 5|
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Wingfeather saga incorrect quotes?
ajhgkfalsj okay, sure. (oh my gosh I had too much fun with this I had to make myself stop, looking up incorrect quotes is a hoot xD)
Warning: Quotes reference things from all four books and therefore have out of context spoilers, read at your own risk
I think I’ve tried to do these before but I can only remember the one. The one I remember is:
(that one scene in The Monster in the Hollows be like- ) Janner: if I run and jump at uncle Artham he will most certainly catch me in his arms. Janner: *running at Artham* INCOMING! Artham: NO! I’M HOLDING COFFEE! *drops his mug and catches Janner anyway* Janner: *grinning while Artham holds him and rolls his eyes*
And now have whatever else I come up with:
Kalmar: the risk I took was calculated, but boy am I bad at math
Fang!Kalmar: I am jus a little creature, tha’s it
Tink: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth? Janner: You’re a hazard to society Leeli: And a coward. Do twenty.
Kalmar: If I die, my funeral is going to be the biggest party ever and you’re all invited Janner: If? Maraly: Great, the only party I’ve ever been invited to and he might not even die.
Leeli: What's a word that’s a mix between 'sad' and 'mad'? Janner: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated- Kalmar: Smad.
Janner: WHY. why did you give Kalmar a KNIFE?! Artham: I’m sorry. He said he felt unsafe. Janner: Now I feel unsafe! Artham: I’m sorry. Artham: ... would you like a knife?
Maraly: Someone will die. Tink: Of fun! :)
Nia: Okay, truth or dare? Artham: Truth Nia: How many hours have you slept this week? Artham: Artham: ...Dare Nia: Go to bed. Artham: I don’t like this game.
Yurgen: Fool me once, I’m gonna kill you
Maraly: I prevented a murder today. Sara: Really? How’d you do that? Maraly: self control.
Leeli: My life isn’t as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look like.
(at the end of book 4) Nia: are you okay? Kalmar: no. I want to leave the country and start a new life.
Aurendelle: Physically, yes, I could fight a bird. But emotionally? Imagine the toll. (because of Artham get it? I think I’m funny)
Ouster Will: I’m sick and tired of being called 'mortal' like, you don’t know that. Neither do I. I have never died even ONCE. Nothing has been proven yet. Stop making assumptions. It’s rude.
Kalmar: Mama always says you can be part of the problem or part of the solution, but I happen to believe you can be both.
Maraly: In light of what you did for me, you can hug me for four to five seconds. Gammon: FORTY FIVE SECONDS?! Maraly: No! Four to five seconds! Gammon: Too late!
(I’m going to jail for this one) Artham: Punch me in the face. Podo: Punch you? Artham: Yes, punch me in the face. Didn’t you hear me? Podo: I always hear “punch me in the face” when you’re speaking, but it’s usually subtext.
Janner: Kalmar was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some. Kalmar: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it. Janner: Kal, you ate a chair.
Nia: Can I offer you a bit of advice? Maraly: Is it about the way I’m dressed? Nia: Yes, but it’s too late for that.
Artham: *Gently taps table* Esben: *Taps back* Aurendelle: What are they doing? Nia: Morse code. Artham: *Aggressively taps table* Esben: *Slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK-
Gnag the Nameless: Who are you to stand against Gnag the Nameless, destroyer of empires? Kalmar: Kalmar Wingfeather, robber of ATMs!
Sara: Don’t be sad! Artham: Why not? Sara: Sara: I don’t have a good answer.
Leeli: is this juice or perfume? Kalmar: chugs entire contents of bottle Kalmar: Kalmar: that’s perfume.
Artham: What if mayonnaise came in cans Esben: Well that would suck because you can’t microwave metal… Nia: Good morning to everyone except my husband and his brother.
Leeli: would you consider yourself a morning or a night person? Peet: at this point I’m barely even a person
Esben: You must be out of your mind. Nia: What- Esben: Because you’ve been in mine all day Esben: winks with both eyes
Kalmar: what’s with midlife crises? what if someone dies young and they never knew when their midlife crisis was? you never know your midlife point. Janner: that’s why I’ve decided to have an ongoing crisis.
Kalmar: I’m an idiot Janner: Leeli: Sara: Janner: If you’re waiting for us to disagree, this is gonna be a long day.
Sara: you really put aside everything and came all this way for me? how did you even get here so fast? Janner: several traffic violations. Maraly: three counts of resisting arrest. Kalmar: roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. Leeli: also, that’s not our houndrick.
Leeli, following Janner and Kal: This is such a bad idea. Kalmar: Then why are you coming along? Leeli: One of us needs to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.
okay I'll stop there xD this was so much fun oh my goodness
Bonus Wingfeather Falls one:
Stan: How would you kids like to do something for money? The Wingfeather and Pines kids: …. Janner: Can we have some details first?
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jairoglyphs · 3 years
Text
wanna scream
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warmau · 3 years
Text
Love Struck!AU x SF9
lately i just need to write about every member of every kpop group being in capital L love. find other love struck!aus here: monsta x | day6 | ateez | the boyz
youngbin
overcompensates with selfless acts that go above and beyond what any person deserves
offers to carry your bags, learns about plumbing when you mention you have a leaky faucet, asks if you want him to drive you to your appointments which you are perfectly fine getting to on your own
if there was a puddle of mud on the ground, youngbin would throw his brand new jacket over it just so you could walk over it
even though you could literally just. walk around it
doesn't even realize he's overdoing it
he just loves you and therefore knows he has to show it at any given part of the day
but not like in an aggressive manner
just a small smile and a "i can pick you up and drop you off if you want!"
dawon: actually, youngbin, we have practice at that tim-
youngbin, shoving a sandwich down dawon's throat: so you said noon right?
when you respectfully decline any of his help, mostly because you are worried you're using your friend for his kindness, everyone assures you that's not it
actually everyone is super confused how you haven't seen why it is weird that youngbin would commit hours of research for you when you ask offhandedly if you should visit europe for the summer and then show up at your door with ten pamphlets on different european destinations 'by chance'
because - that's weird - and weird means, in the great way of sf9, that he has a crush on you
"youngbin, you're being so nice to me these days how could i ever repay you?
youngbin about to say that there's nothing you need to do, he just likes being able to help
dawon, shoving a sandwich down youngbin's throat for revenge and also to answer on his leader's behalf: "actually, if you could finally go on a date with him - i think that would repay it."
you get all shy and murmur that you don't know if youngbin wants that, and youngbin can only vigorously nod that he does
(due to the sandwich)
inseong
no clue if puppy syndrome is a thing, but he's got it
the human embodiment of big puppy eyes whenever you're around, big puppy pout, big puppy wagging his tail at just the mention of your name
even without all that - the energy that exists around inseong when you are near him and giving him attention - it's enough to quite literally blow everyone and everything else away
and there are lasting effects
as in you walk away from the conversation and fifteen minutes later inseong still can't make out a single word, just chin on his palm - daydreamy look in his eyes
jaeyoon tries snapping his fingers in his face, tickling him, even flicking his best friend straight on the forehead but.
nothing.
the only way he breaks out of the spell you cast on him is either a long time passes or you show up again and inseong is back at your full attention
it's getting bad, like to a point where he walks into walls or drops his phone in the sink when he starts thinking about you
incidents where he nearly topples over onto poor chain who is like get off of me you are built like a skyscraper
or just flat out doesn't move a muscle in the right direction during practice and it's literally driving youngbin mad
so jaeyoon (like the best friend he is) arranges for you to come hang out with him but tada it's actually a candlelight dinner in the sf9 kitchen he and the rest of the boys set up for you and inseong
and you're like w....whats all this and inseong is like i don't know either
and jaeyoon (who like the best friend he is picked the nicest smelling candle from the tj maxx sale aisle) appears and lights it and is like this is for you two to confess and for inseong to be cured of puppyism
you: puppyism?
inseong, red as a tomato: i think he means like the way i act around you like a - um -
jaeyoon: like a lovesick puppy, so like....collar him or whatever
you and inseong both looking at him like do what? and jaeyoon is like sorry that didn't come out right
either way you get the point please date the oversized man whose brain wont work unless you give him a kiss
jaeyoon
opposite of his best friend, jaeyoon doesn't need to fall over his feet when he's lovestruck
he will literally just let you know how he feels
"i like you"
you smile at him and laugh, "i like you too!"
and jaeyoon is like amazing so we are both "liking" each other how lovely how nice
and that is....................where it ends
he literally is so preoccupied with the concept of confessing that he forgets the part where he has to like.
confirm the relationship
so for like a month after you are both just saying 'i like you' to each other and he thinks it's romantic and you still think it's platonic
it's a mess
he keeps asking himself when the right time to ask you to go to the movies with him is, if he should pull out the home cooking - why haven't you pulled out the home cooking? do you not "like" him enough for that?
he paces around before you come over because is he dressed too casual - i mean he's your boyfriend, he should put effort into it right?
and then you show up and nothing is different and everything is the same and when inseong is like
jaeyoon you're dating them right, why don't you guys like kiss? and jaeyoon is like holy shit i haven't even thought about that yet
and dawon is like how have you not thought about that kissing is all i think about ever
and so jaeyoon's head gets even more scrambled because now you come over and he's like ..... kiss......lips......mouth...hand? kiss on mouth...hand...lips.....hug?
and you're like what? and he's like hug lips mouth? and you're like jaeyoon are you ok?
oh my god at some point you're both alone and jaeyoon is walking you home or something and he reaches out to grab your hand because like that's normal right? people dating do that right?
and you're like oh! and he's like is this ok? and you're like a-does it mean something?
and jaeyoon is like it means the same thing as i like you....you know....like how i said it a month ago and i just thought we could take the next step-
he's rubbing his neck and blushing and he has always been sauve and straightforward and it dawns on you that the entirety of this month he has been saying he likes you like in that way
and you're like wait you like-love me? and he's like yes wait what did you think- and you're like i thought it was like-like ....like friend like?
you and jaeyoon just staring at each other and then he's like should i let go of your hand then
and you're like no. actually just kiss me we've wasted a LITERAL month
dawon
always the class clown, being lovestruck somehow only tends to make it worse
but not worse like oh he gets louder and cracks more jokes.
my man has upgraded to mildly dangerous body humor.
you are all together and dawon is suddenly like you guys think i can climb that uneven, rickety tree? and youngbin is like no and you're like no but dawon is like it'll be fun just watch
dawon: should i drink spoiled milk
you: why-
dawon: im hardcore it'll be fine - look im just a goofy guy who - oh my god. call an ambulance.
the idea is that every time you are in the vicinity and glowing like an angel without a halo dawon is like
gotta do something so outrageously stupid that it grabs their attention and/or lands me in a situation where i can excuse myself to run away from my feelings. perfect.
it's literally the dumbest logic on the planet
everyone tells him it's the dumbest logic on the planet
but dawon is convinced it's the best reaction to....to the butterflies in his stomach
of course, you don't find any of it amusing, you are just in a constant state of worry
one time dawon takes it too far and probably tries to do something that could actually seriously hurt him
and you stop him by grabbing him and being like stop - i don't know why you don't care about yourself but i care about you so stop being stupid
and dawon is staring down at you like
"pause, you care about me? like on a scale of 1-10 how muc-"
you kiss him and mutter a "11" and dawon thinks he sees stars
youngbin thanking you profusely like we were worried for his actual literal life
zuho
rather scream into the void than confront how he feels about you
the private twitter account is blowing up with tweets about how he wants to hold your hand and how that makes him pathetic
dawon replying under each of them: tru
rowoon replying under each of them: not true!!!!! love is awesome!!!! pog as chani would say!!!!!!
you talk to him about something and his ears are full of white noise and he cant help but think about how your face is somehow the most beautiful thing he's ever seen and how he could write a whole album about the curve of your nose and the color of your eyes and -
you ask him what he thinks and he can only reply with a sound that is both pained and high pitched and when you raise your eyebrow he's like gtg uh feed my cats
when you're around he disappears to "feed his cats" like . ten times
surprisingly being a lovestruck fool does fuel his ability to make music
but it is also sad and about being heartbroken and the members are like hey do you wanna talk about it and zuho is like no
there are spotify playlists with your name, there are journal entries about you, there are iPhone notes app scribbles about you
he's down bad
everyone knows he's down bad
you also figure out he's down bad and so you finally confront him
except you're like......... zuho who are you in love with? ill help you if i can
and he looks at you like a deer in headlights because that's the most bizarre shit you could ask him
and because of the shock he blurts out the truth
"you. i love you."
screams after and you jump up and he's like i need to leave and you're like AT LEAST LET ME SAY IT BACK?????
rowoon
it's the cluelessism of it all
he looks at you one day and instead of just being a person you are beaming at him like a direct sunray and he's like woah! weird!
he just kind of becomes more clumsy around you since you've got this new effect on him
trips over his big feet, giggles randomly while you're talking, forgets he's in the middle of the street when you're walking by his side and someone has to honk three times for him to start walking again
honestly no one can tell what's wrong with him
because is he like ... is it early onset amnesia? is he just spacing out?
even chani notices the shift because rowoon has gone from annoying him to laying half off the couch with his hand in an empty pringles can
"what are you thinking about?"
rowoon just mutters your name and chani is like .... i don't know about all this but maybe you like them?
reality hits rowoon like a freight truck .... liking you? that's new
he googles 'what to do when you like someone?' literally googles it
tries to show you by playing it cool, tries to show you by showering you in random compliments but he's tongue tied when you smile so he's like i love your hair it looks like. cheese
embarrasses himself over and over and over until he just hunches himself over one day and is like
why is liking someone so hard? isn't it supposed to be easy?
and you're like haha i know the feeling, ive liked someone for so long but he never takes a hint and rowoon is like omg who
and you look at him and you're like well he's a tall clueless handsome guy
and rowoon stares at you like he sounds nice
and you're like you
and he's like oh that's nice - WAIT
taeyang
flirts with you but it flops because he's been flirting with you since you first met
so you cannot tell the difference and taeyang is like what am i doing wrong
inseong: karma for always winking and calling them cute when now you want them to do it back to you
taeyang: shuttup sad old man
inseong: you've been hanging out too much with chani. sniffle
he decides ok so regular flirting doesn't work, so what about lowkey flexing?
he wears the expensive watch and puts his hand in front of you like, hey and you're like hi? and he's like notice anything? and you're like .... um..... oh, your tag is sticking out of your shirt! and taeyang is like .........F
ok so not flexing, what about compliments?
he piles like ten of them on you and you're like oh - thanks, but i don't really like this outfit anyway and he's like....F
ok so not flexing, compliments, let's try playing hard to get
he gives you the cold shoulder when you come over and you immediately are like taeyang are you mad at me if you are im sorry so stop being a weirdo and he's like........F
finally he just reverts to himself and just keeps up the regular flirting and the soft touches and smiles
and he realizes the difference now is when he flirts - he just has to follow up on it
so when he asks " i cant taste my lips, can you do it for me?"
and you reply with "sure" and roll your eyes
he just . does kiss you and you're like oh.
and he's like well what do you say and you're like your lips taste sweet and he's like NO I MEAN-
you just kiss him again because now you get what he actually means LOL
hwiyoung
sulks when you're not around, and then doesn't go near you when you are around
it's like please make up your mind
is the definition of if i stare at you long enough you will fall in love with me right?
but he stares from ten feet away
it takes everyone all their strength to drag him out of his room when you're over and even then he puts his hoodie up and plays with his shoelaces and acts like he's a five year old
when he gets put next to you in the car ride somewhere he almost passes out from holding his breath from nervousness and you turn to him and you're like hwi you're turning purple?!?!?
you tap his shoulder when he isn't looking and call him hwi~ and he thinks his knees like. give out he crumbles to the floor and you're like oh my god are you sick??!?!!?
to put it simply, being in love forces him to lose his human ability to live
gets a pep talk from literally every member about how he cannot act like this. it's giving you the wrong impression and yet he just
he can't do anything about it you enter his personal space and the little nerves in his brain go haywire
"i don't want them to think im being rude, but it's kind of like im allergic to them."
"oh - you're allergic to me?"
hwiyoung turns and you're giving him a look and he's like oh god i mean - i don't - i mean like -
and he doesn't know what to say but you just giggle and you're like "fine, if you're allergic we'll have to make immune"
and he's like blinking like wha-
you wrap your hands around him and he's like !!!! and you're like here just take me in large doses until you build up immunity ok?
hwiyoung nodding because he has forgotten the entirety of the korean language
chani
realizes he's being freaking weird when he bails on his plans to eat and game to hang out with you
prioritizing social interaction over being alone in his room......now that's not normal
yes, ok, so he likes you - but now he's like
no one can ever know that. i will not be left alone if anyone finds out.
unfortunately, he asks jaeyoon of all people if he knows what food you like and jaeyoon is like
OH YOU WANNA ASK THEM ON A DATE RIGHT SO YOU WANNA LOOK UP RESTAURANTS WITH THAT FOOD RIGHT?
chani standing in the doorway like. what. no....
the minute chani starts picking the spot next to you when you're all together is his downfall
the entire world knows how he feels and he's like oh fuck seriously
he helps you go shopping and he comes home and every member is just like :) tell us about the date :)
and he's like SHUTTUP
calls you by a nickname and rowoon almost chokes on his food in surprise, because chani?????? gave someone???? a nickname????? and it isn't a combination of the word ass and hole?????
he cannot escape the fact that little things for others, are big things for him
being attentive and caring and even just smiling in your presence is enough to give away how he's feeling
let alone he dropped a rank in league so everyone is like ah - he's distracted with someone~!
it gets unbearable to a point where chani is like i cant live with these people always bothering me so im just going to confess
he pulls you aside and is like "i want to date you - is that ok?" and you're like of course, was wondering when you'd ask dummy and he's like,,,,,,listen,,,,
assumes the teasing will die down when you both come into the room holding hands
BUT OH IS HE WRONG
inseong: i got dibs on being the wedding planner, eat dirt youngbin
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yanderegremlin · 2 years
Note
All right so imagine this: Reader is feeling really lonely and alone and she suddenly starts crying one fine day because of the loneliness and yanderes KiriBaku(poly) see her crying because she needs someone to be there for her, she wants someone to be there for her. How would they react? This takes place before the kidnapping phase
sorry this took me so long, but I hope you enjoy none the less
Warnings: yandere behavior, lonely reader, Polyamorous, Hurt/Comfort, KiriBaku.
Another day, another dollar.
Eat, sleep, work, repeat, it was driving you mad. Every time your family or friends made plans with you something would come up. Every. single. time. It wasn’t anything they or you could do about it but you still felt lonely. You didn’t know what to do with the all ‘alone time’ you had.
Once again sitting on your couch with a pint of chocolate ice cream watching your favorite show. “What are you doing?” you thought out loud. You felt so abandoned, left behind. You always hated your mind when it did this, always second-guessing yourself, always taking the blame for everything.
Another day, another heartache.
A knock woke you up from your restless sleep, you must have cried yourself asleep. Looking at the wall clock above the TV it says it’s about 1am, you couldn’t fathom who would be disturbing you at such a late hour. Your mama raised no fool, maybe a little over cautious but definitely not an idiot. Grabbing your metal bat named Real Steel from your bedroom, you open the front door slowly, ready to defend yourself if needs be.
Okay so maybe you are a little idiotic, instead of asking who was there before opening the door like a normal person, you just open it ready to swing like madman, but fortunately it was your lovable neighbor kirishima who caught your bat before it could do any real damage. “Hey ther- whoa there, little missy, it’s just us.”
“Oh…”
“‘Oh’ what the hell were you thinking, of course it was us, who else would it be.” Bakugou, Kirishima’s partner, huffed beside him, he looked grumpier than usual, if that was even possible, while Kiri looked like he hadn't slept a wink this week.
“Sorry, C4. thought you were robbers or something…” Bakugou just rolled eyes at you “So what are you guys doing up this hour?” you rubbed your eyes trying to keep awake.
Kiri rubbed the back of his neck, “about that, you seem a little off lately so, we just wanted to check on you.”
“Aww thank you guys, I’ve been good just…” you hesitated, you’ve known them for a little while but would they want to hear it? Everybody gets lonely from time to time, it’s not as a big deal as you'll make it out to be.
“Just what? Spit it out, I’m not standing out here just you daydream about gods knows what.” Bakugou’s voice cuts through your thoughts.
“Just been feeling a little lonely, not a big deal. I’ll get over it.”
Kiri puts a warm hand on your shoulder. “Hey, don’t say that. Even if it may not seem like a big deal to you, your feelings still matter, they matter to us at last.”
“Thank you, both of you, I guess I’ve been a little frustrated with all my plans falling through all this week.”
“Why didn’t you call us? We would have come over if you wanted some company, dolt.”
A yawn escapes you. “Yeah I guess so, sorry for worrying you two. Do you two want to hangout sometime this week?”
“Hack yeah! Do you have tomorrow off? We can have a sleepover so you don’t have to be lonely tonight.”
“Are you 5?! Of course she doesn’t want a sleepover.” Towards his partner to scolded him when your giggles caught his attention.
“I wouldn’t be opposed to it if it was okay with you Katsuki.” both Kirishima and Bakugou hearts skip a beat seeing you start to smile again.
“If that’s what you want, I’ll go get our stuff.” with that Bakugou lifted you with Kirishima, lending you back to your home. Little did you know that this was phase one of their plan to have you all to themself.
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literallymitch · 3 years
Text
𝐆𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬 || 𝐃.𝐃
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requested: no
summary: the first part of the reputation series in which the reader first meets Damiano
pairing: Damiano David x famous!reader
word count: 2k
what kind of content: fluff
warnings: drinking
passages written in cursive are flashbacks
some of the lyrics were changed so they would fit the story
Please don’t steal any of my conten and release it elsewhere. Also all of this is fiction. I don’t know these people in real life nor do I know how they act
a/n I I hope you all enjoy this one, as much as I do. I’m so excited about this series jdhidcuheu. What song do you guys think is next? As always please keep in mind english is not my first language. I’m super happy about feedback!!
With a buzzing head I woke up. I shouldn’t have drank so much yesterday. Feeling the after effects of the alcohol I consumed yesterday, I looked at the sleeping figure next to me. A gorgeous man with brown hair and tattoos that fitted him perfectly. I smiled to myself, knowing he was the reason I probably drank a little too much yesterday. There was no way I would have found the courage to actually talk to him otherwise. He looked like an angel sleeping so peacefully in my queen-sized bed. As I looked at his sleeping figure, an idea popped into my head. I grabbed my notebook and went to my balcony that was connected to my bedroom. Looking at him one last time through the huge window in front of me. I opened my notebook and started writing down some lyrics in memory of last night.
You should take it as a compliment That I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk You should think about the consequence Of your magnetic field being a little too strong
“We wanted to start working on our next album soon too.” , the gorgeous man in front of me said with an Italian accent.
After a few drinks I was finally talking to him. I was too busy taking in his beauty that I didn’t really listen  to what he just said to me. All of a sudden, I started giggling.
“You know, your accent is so funny, I love it. Like the way you pronounce some words? Hilarious”.
“Thanks, I guess?”
I cringed a little thinking about this specific moment. If he knew the only reason I was making a fool out of myself in front of him was his magnificent appearance, he would take it as a compliment. He probably already knew that was the reason. How could he not know? It’s not like he has never looked in a mirror. Also, there is no way, I am the first person that had to suffer from his magnetic self. By now he should know what his whole existence is doing to people.
And I got a boyfriend, he's older than us He's in the club doing, I don't know what You're so cool, it makes me hate you so much (I hate you so much)
“Shouldn’t your boyfriend be here as well?” the beautiful Italian boy asked.
“My wha- Oh you mean Andre? He isn’t my boyfriend. The media just made that up after we went out once, and I was caught at two of his games. We haven't talked in months. He’s probably at some club right now, annoying some poor girl.”
At that moment I thought I’ve seen a small smile appear on his face. He then just turned to the bar tender, ordering another beer. God, how could he just keep his cool like this the whole night. Usually it was the other way around. People would stand drunk in front of me trying to make a move, while I just stood there unimpressed. He really made me feel like an insecure fourteen-year-old girl again, and I hated him for that
Whisky on ice, Sunset and Vine You've ruined my life, by not being mine
“The sunset is really beautiful today” Damiano stated sipping on his glass of Whisky. I nodded in agreement while I ate a grape from the vine that was placed on the bar counter.
The bar were at was on top of a small mountain somewhere outside Rome. From there we had a great view over the whole city of Rome and how the sun met the city's skyline. It really was beautiful, still it was nothing compared to him. I wish he would’ve been mine, so I could’ve rested my head on his shoulder right there and then, but he wasn’t.
You should take it as a compliment That I'm talking to everyone here but you (but you, but you)
“I’m glad we’re finally getting a chance to talk after you talked to, well, everyone else at this bar except me.”, the handsome man called me out while he sat down next to me.”
Feeling a bit caught, I just gave him an awkward smile. I tried to come up  with a reasonable excuse, that was less embarrassing than ‘Yeah sorry about that, I was just too scared to talk to you because you look like you’re straight out of my dreams.’
“I’m really sorry about that! It was just that every time I was done talking to someone, the next person already stood behind me wanting to talk.” I lied.
“It’s alright. I guess that's what happens when you’re a world-famous singer.”
And you should think about the consequence Of you touching my hand in the darkened room
It was now 11pm and the sky outside was completely dark. The lights in the bar were also dimmed a bit, creating a cozy atmosphere. Damiano and I were in the middle of our conversation, as he accidentally grabbed my hand, that was resting on the bar counter, instead of his drink. It felt like an electric shock. An electric shock that woke up the butterflies inside my body. My hand started to tingle, and I’m pretty I was full on blushing now.
If you've got a girlfriend, I'm jealous of her But if you're single that's honestly worse 'Cause you're so gorgeous it actually hurts
“So do you have a girlfriend?”,  at this point I was so drunk I didn’t even care how this question came across anymore.
I was pretty sure he in fact had a girlfriend, I mean how could he not looking like this?
“No I don’t.” Thank god. “It’s kinda hard building up a real relationship with someone when you're always busy, but I guess you can tell me a thing or two about it too.”
Oh, yes, I could. Still I would drop everything I was doing right now,  just to be with him.
Chocolate brown eyes looking in mine I feel like I might sink and drown and die
Just as my confidence made a small comeback, I made the mistake to directly look into Damianos beautiful brown eyes. There really wasn’t a single thing about him that wasn’t extremely beautiful. I started to feel a bit dizzy as a wave of heat rushed through my body. What is this man doing to me?
Just thinking about it again made my heart beat three times faster.
You make me so happy, it turns back to sad, yeah There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have You are so gorgeous it makes me so mad You make me so happy, it turns back to sad, yeah There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have
For like the million time this evening, he made a laugh. Great, so he wasn’t just incredibly handsome, but also extremely funny. I didn’t realize how happy I was in his presence until I remembered he wasn’t mine. Suddenly I felt kind of sad, thinking about how I maybe would never see him again after tonight. I just wanted to grab his hand and run away with him. Somewhere I could be alone with him. Somewhere he would be only mine.
Guess I'll just stumble on home to my cats Alone, unless you wanna come along
I looked at the clock that was hanging on the wall behind the bar tender. I was shocked when I realized it was already midnight. There was no way we’ve been talking for like three hours now. I scanned the room for my friends, I went here with in the first place.
“Looking for someone specific?” Damiano asked, now also looking in the direction I was looking in.
“Just my friends, but it seems like they already went home. I’ll check if they texted me” I picked up my phone, checking if I had a message from my friends.
‘Hi babe, we already went home, we were kinda tired. Have fun talking to handsome stranger. You better tell us everything tomorrow ;)’
“Did they text you?”
“Yes, my friend texted me that they already went home. Guess I’ll have to go home alone then. At least my cats are waiting for me.” I stood up and tried to make my way over to the wardrobe to get my coat. Unfortunately I forgot how drunk I actually and almost tripped as I tried to walk. Alcohol and heels really are not a good combo. Thankfully Damiano grabbed my arm helping me to stabilize myself.
“You’re sure, you’ll make it home alone?”
“Yes, I am a big girl. Unless you wanna come along.” I said with a cheeky grin on my face.
Damiano left out a soft chuckle. He paid for our drinks and then accompanied me on my way back home.
“It’s already pretty late, if you want to, you can stay over.” I told him after he brought me up to my bedroom.
“That would be nice, thanks.”
After I got myself ready for bed, I basically fell into my cozy bed, cuddling myself up in my soft sheet.
“You mind telling me where your guestroom is before falling asleep?” the Italian boy asked with an amused look on his face.
“Mmh, I don’t know. Just sleep here, it's fine.” I answered him, already half asleep.
After that, I probably fell asleep, since I don’t remember anything else that happened.
You're so gorgeous I can't say anything to your face (to your face) 'Cause look at your face
“Good morning.” I heard a raspy voice say.
I looked up from my notebook and came face to face with Damiano gorgeous figure. His hair was messy, and he still looked a bit sleepy. Since he just wore a pair of boxer shorts, I could finally see all the tattoos that covered his upper body. All of a sudden I felt the same way as I did last night when I saw him for the first time. The words were stuck in my throat and I felt the anxiety build up in my body. How does he manage to make me feel this way by just existing?
“Good morning. Did you sleep well?” I somehow managed to say.
“Yes I did thank you. What are you doing?” he asked me curiously as he sat down on the garden chair next to me.
“I’m just writing a song. The idea came to mind when I woke up.”
“Not gonna lie, it’s pretty impressive that you’re able to write a song now after you could barely walk yesterday.” a small laugh left his mouth. “Can I see it?”
“No, it’s kinda awful. I’m to hungover to write something good now. I just wanted to write the idea down.” I lied,  I actually really liked the stuff I wrote so far, but he would probably think I’m a freak when he found out I wrote a song about after knowing him for a day.
“Can you at least tell me what it is about?”
“So you can steal my brilliant idea? No, thanks.” we both started laughing. “I can offer you breakfast though”
“I’m fine with that too” he said flashing me his beautiful smile
And I'm so furious At you for making me feel this way But what can I say? You're gorgeous
We were now sitting on my roof garden eating breakfast. Damiano told me some things about his life and what interests he had. As he did, so I looked at him in awe. I really started crushing on him as he continued to talked about his last tour with a huge smile on his face. I hated it that I was practically on my knees for him already, but how could I not? He’s perfect.
“I could really get used to this, you know?” he said out of nowhere.
“Me too.” I responded, not really questioning what he meant.
I also didn’t care as long as it involved us spending time together. I would make him mine no matter what.
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hops-hunny · 3 years
Text
Those Bloody Girls
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Pairing: Neville Longbottom x Beauxbaton!Reader
Pronouns: She/Her
Word Count: 2.2k
Request: “I couldn't sleep soooo
Neville absolutely worshiping his beauxbaton gf but his friends think he's full of shit when he tries to tell them about how fucking gorgeous and fantastic she is. And everytime he tries to introduce her to his friends something goes wrong and his friends end up looking at him like he's crazy cuz he's introducing absolutely nothing but air. And separately she has been accidentally meeting all his friends one on one, helping Ron pick up his books in the hall, cleaning off some soot from Seamus face because he looked rather silly, encouraging harry before one of his quidditch matches/Triwizard trials etc and all the while they have no idea that's Nevilles wonderful gf and they all develop a crush on her never telling each other anything so when they finally meet her it's hilarious 😂
-🦡”
Summary: The request says it all
Warnings: None!
A/N: This was such a fun idea. I loved writing this all hail 🦡 anon.
If there was anything Beauxbaton girl's were known for, it was their beautiful looks. They were graceful and diligent, each one graced with the face of an angel, and Neville just so happened to have the prettiest one. They had met during the summer by a complete chain of accidents resulting in one of the greatest blessings he could've ever asked for. Neville was lucky and he knew it, never letting anyone forget.
"Oh bullshit! You're saying she's got a cute face, nice waist, and she can bake? Ha! I'll believe it when I see it, Nev." Ron snorted, Seamus nodding along with him.
"Yeah you expect us to just believe a girl from Beauxbaton of all places chose you? No offense Nev but Beauxbaton girl's have standards and none of us Hogwarts boys meet em." Seamus said, shrugging as he continued to throw rolled up bits of paper in Dean's hair (who still hadn't noticed.). Neville rolled his eyes in irritation, looking to Harry and Dean as well but for once, they were on the same page as the other two.
"Sorry Nev. It's just, a Beauxbaton girl? And from the way you describe it, the most beautiful one in her year if not school?" Harry said, giving him a sympathetic look. 
"Yeah mate. You've gotta understand where we're coming from." Dean chimed, turning his attention back to the assignment in his lap. Neville groaned, glaring at his friends.
"You guys act like I haven't tried to introduce you to her! Every time I try to you guys go and get yourselves into something stupid or I end up busy. Let's all agree that Friday you will meet her, no matter what." the boys all nodded in agreement, not really thinking much of it. After all, there was no girlfriend but if it'd ease his mind, they'd show up.
----------------
Ron swore angrily, rolling his eyes in frustration. It was just his luck that he'd drop all his quills and the massive scroll of paper rolling away with his bits of sanity. Normally he'd just collect them and go on with it, not really worrying about time but for once in his god damn life he had made an effort to study for the exam he had next hour and if he was late? All that bloody time would be wasted! However, his worries began to fade as a small manicured (s/c) hand began to gather his quills. His eyes widened as he looked at the girl, mouth gaping.
She had (h/l) (h/c) hair that was an even more vibrant (h/c) in the afternoon sun. Beautiful plush (s/c) thighs (that he'd like to see more from under that little skirt), and not to mention the most beautiful set of (e/c) eyes he had ever seen. But when she smiled? Oh when she smiled, he was hooked. The little emblem on her shirt confirmed his suspicion. Beauxbaton. However what he did miss was the words that were currently leaving her mouth.
"I'm sorry...what?" he asked, causing a giggle to erupt from the girl's mouth. She smiled, handing him the quills that he had dropped.
"I said it's a shame that this happened to you! I hope you aren't too late. I have a free period so I'll carry these to your class for you!" she offered, silence falling over them as he continued to stare at her in awe. His face flushed as she cleared her throat, looking at him expectantly.
"O-oh! Right, yes, thank you. That'd be helpful." He offered her a small smile as he began to walk. The entire time of the walk there, she helped him by quizzing him on the subject and by the time he got there, he felt like he remembered everything!
Everything but asking for her name. He felt like an idiot but for once, it wasn't because of school.
------------------------
Seamus sat at the cauldron, focusing on the ingredients list. His partner had decided from every other time in potions, that he wasn't allowed to touch anything. They had a perfect grade and didn't want it to be ruined from the likes of him. However, he was growing restless. It couldn't be too hard...right? Wrong, so wrong.
He dropped in a few spider legs, stirring counterclockwise like the book had instructed. However, as it turned an angry red and bubbles began to form, he knew that he had screwed up big time. He tried backing away but it was too late, the potion had erupted in a large explosion, black soot coating his face and hair. Everyone in the class turned to look at him, some laughing while some were utterly annoyed. This was such a common thing that it was a miracle when he didn’t blow something up. He flashed Snape a bright smile, ignoring the way the vein on the man’s forehead twitched and juttered in annoyance.
“Class dismissed.” he seethed out. Before he could issue a punishment, Seamus ran off down the hallway ignoring the harsh yells of the potion’s master. He continued to run and run until he accidentally bumped into a group of girls sending him straight to the floor. His face turned rouge with embarrassment as they laughed at his scuffed appearance but a divine voice broke through the laughter.
“Leave him alone guys! You all go ahead, I’ll catch up with you later.” she said, pushing her friends to go ahead in the other direction. Seamus looked up, admiring how beautiful they were but especially the (h/c) haired one in the middle of them all. She was a walking sculpture, a painting straight from the louvre. She was..
“Hot.” he blattered out, not even realizing his words. His eyes widened as he stood up clearing his throat. Luckily for him she hadn’t heard him, causing him to look up to the ceiling and give a quick thank to Merlin himself. She looked back at him, frowning slightly as she observed the soot on his freckled face. Her eyes lit up as she reached into the small purse on her shoulder, pulling out a silk fabric.
“Can’t have you going around looking all silly! Come here.” she said, motioning for him to lean down. He did so instantaneously, cheeks turning even more red as she licked the small fabric before beginning to wipe at the mess on his face. It was an action his mother had done multiple times but for some reason, he found this to be far more endearing. Her face was close to his, giving him a good look at the light layer of gloss on her plump lips. He couldn’t help but wonder if anyone had ever kissed them before, if she had ever had them wrapped around a-
“All done! I can’t do much for your hair but it’s not that noticeable. I have to get going though, bye!” She said flashing him a smile before walking away. When she was out of sight, he couldn’t help but wonder if that had even happened. Did a beautiful girl really just hold his face and clean it...out of the kindness of her heart? Was it truly possible for someone to look so perfect and act so kind? He didn’t know but he surely did wanna find out. He smirked to himself, standing up straight as he walked down the hall.
“She wants me.”
---------------------------------
Harry splashed some water on his face, running a shaky hand through his hair. No matter how many times he’d hop on that broom, zooming around in the sky with the intent to win, he always got painstakingly nervous before a match. He observed his appearance, grimacing at the sickly green undertone to his face. Was he going to puke again? Didn’t matter, he didn’t have time. Sighing he walked out the bathroom, sneaking to observe how many people were in the crowd. His eyes began to wander to the Beauxbaton girls, admiring how pretty they were in the stands. However, what he wasn’t prepared for was for a pretty face to walk over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder.
“Harry, right?” she asked, a gentle smile on her stunning face. His breath hitched as he felt himself be taken by a new set of nerves.
“R-right. Yeah that’s me. I’m, I’m Harry.” he internally kicked himself. How embarrassing. One of the most lovely girls he had ever seen and here he was, making himself look like a fool. His nerves were soothed some when he heard her laugh, a sound like beautiful Christmas bells.
“I think we already established that.” she said, grinning even more. She patted his shoulder as she looked at him, eyes full of sincerity. “No need to be nervous. I’ve heard you’re one of the best players on the field! Do your best out there! I’m rooting for ya.” she began walking off, flipping her Gryffindor scarf around her shoulder. Whether she meant rooting for him personally or the team didn’t matter. A determined look took his face as he began to make his way to his team. He was going to win this, for her.
----------------------
Friday came around quicker than any of them had expected, not like it mattered to them. They all sat around looking at each other, a shared thought running through most of their heads. As if Neville could hear it, he groaned standing up angrily.
“Guys! I swear she’s real! She’s just running a bit late, she’s horrible with time management. Plus, she’s well known amongst her peers so she’s always getting asked to help with things.” he grumbled, staring at them with disdain. 
“Nev, it’s okay you don’t have to keep lying. We’ll get you a girlfriend since clearly you’re going mad thinking that you have one.” Seamus said, prompting the boy to throw his textbook at the boy which hit his head with a loud thud. They all looked up as peach colored owl flew in, dropping a note into Neville’s hand. The boys set up a bit straighter, unfamiliar with the owl. The boy’s eyes scanned the page, taking in the words before nodding.
“Alright, it seems she wants us to come to her. She’s by the fountain in the courtyard! That’s cute, she forgot she was supposed to come to me.” he chuckled fondly at the thought of his forgetful girlfriend before turning to walk. His friends still sat on the couch, stunned that this girl might actually be real. “Well don’t just sit there, let’s go!”
All of them scrambled up and began to follow their lanky friend, mumbling amongst themselves.
“No way. Do you think she’s real?”
“Well I’ve never seen that owl!”
“This is insane. Okay if she’s real, she definitely can’t be as hot as he said she is.”
“Yeah probably one of the more...unsightly Beauxbaton girls.”
Wrong. Terribly wrong. Th-that was her? It couldn’t be. However, as the girl’s big doe eyes lit up it was slowly becoming a big possibility. And as she ran to him, jumping into his arms, that possibility became reality right in front of their eyes. Neville leaned in kissing the girl, holding her up in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck, smiling into the kiss as she pulled away. Her eyes turned to the group of guys, surprise taking over her face. Neville looked back and forth between her expression and the one of his friends.
“You guys alright?” he asked confusedly, setting the girl back on the ground before pulling her into his side. She eyed them carefully before tilting her head.
“Have we met before?” 
“NO!” they all shouted in unison. They all turned to each other in confusion, stepping away from the happy couple.
“You met her too?!” Harry whisper shouted, eyeing the other two. Ron nodded frantically, unable to respond verbally due to the shock and queasiness overtaking him. The beautiful girl from Wednesday was Neville’s girl? Life was not being fair by putting that bird in his hands.
“Like hell I did! She was practically all over me.” Seamus exclaimed, all of them turning to look at the girl who had a lovesick look on her face as Neville rambled on about something. 
“Okay now that one I doubt. I can’t fucking believe this. I’ve been thinking about her all week.” Ron groaned out, crossing his arms angrily. Harry nodded in agreement, grabbing the flask that Seamus had pulled out taking a big swig of it.
“You’re telling me. I did a lot more than think about her if you know what I mean.” Seamus mumbled, eyeing the girl’s rear.
“Sadly I do and I wish I didn’t.” Harry grimaced as the gruesome image popped up in his head. “Come on, we better head back over before they think something is up.”
“My bunny says she met you all earlier in the week! How come you didn’t tell me?” he questioned, watching as the boys practically drooled over her.
“I dunno sorta...slipped my mind.” Harry trailed off, eyes dragging along her exposed midriff.
“Nah I’ll be honest. Bird was too hot and didn’t get her name. ‘S a shame really.” Seamus shrugged, earning a kick to the knee from Harry. “What?! I know you thought it too. Congrats Longbottom, you’ve got a grade A girl there.”
Neville looked down at the smaller girl, smiling some as she looked away shyly at the kind words she was receiving. 
“Yeah, I do.”
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mammonshuman92 · 3 years
Text
- It Takes Two -
(Mammon x GN!MC)
Genre: angst/hurt/comfort
WARNINGS: alcohol, drunkenness, cheating, **
** There is a moment where a character is drunk, and someone makes moves on them, character is too drunk to realize it’s not who they thought it was. Groping and making out, no penetration; character doesn’t consider is SA. I apologize if it is offensive.
Ya better hurry up, or we’re gonna be late!” Mammon was pulling you by the hand down the hallway to your first class of the day.
“I wasn’t the one who overslept because they kept saying “just lay with me for 5 more minutes.”“ You said, giving your best impression of him.
You’d become best friends rather quickly after your arrival in the Devildom, practically becoming attached at the hip instantly. It didn’t take long for that light, warm feeling to invade your heart. Now you’d been dating for a few months and had become even more inseparable.
“Details, details!” He responded, laughing.
The two of you came barreling through the door with only seconds to spare before the bell rang; hand-in-hand, laughing like fools.
You took your seats across the room from each other, being the professors current punishment for Mammon talking to you during class.
As you sat down you felt eyes on you and looked up.
A few succubi were not so casually looking at you and whispering.
It wasn’t uncommon though. I mean, you are a human in the Devildom. You also live with the 7 rulers of the underworld. You’d gotten quite used to people whispering about you. You decided to ignore them, and pay attention to class. Whatever they were whispering about was surely nothing you hadn’t already heard circulating throughout the gossip mill.
Throughout the day, you noticed the same group of succubi whispering and giving you looks. They even giggled a couple times. You tried your best to keep your cool, but it had been going on all day and it was really getting under your skin.
What is so damn funny? You thought to yourself.
The final bell rang and you couldn’t be happier. Now you got to put the day behind you and go home with Mammon. Tonight is movie night. Cuddling and eating junk food is just what you need after a day like today.
You rushed to the usual spot where you meet Mammon. Seeing his face would definitely make you feel better right now, but he wasn’t there yet. 
He must have gotten hung up in class or something.
You leaned against the wall, pulled out your D.D.D. and started surfing Deviltube to pass the time. You were so engrossed in your video that you barely noticed that same group of succubi walk past.
Until they made sure you noticed them, that is.
One girl bumped into you on purpose, sending your D.D.D. to the concrete, via crash-landing.
“Stupid human.” She sneered.
You rolled your eyes and bent down to pick up your D.D.D. It’s nothing you haven’t heard, quite a bit actually, since coming to the Devildom. She’d have to try a lot harder than that.
When you stood back up, the succubus in question was standing in front of you, arms crossed with a smug grin.
“Do you think you’re special?” She asked, looking you up and down. You didn’t respond and resumed your scrolling through Deviltube. Ignoring her made her mad.
“As soon as he gets tired of you, he’ll move on to the next one.”
Excuse me? 
“I don’t think MY relationship is any of your concern.” You said sweetly, slapping on your best fake smile. You looked around them, desperate to see Mammon walking up, but he wasn’t there.
Where is he? 
She was practically laughing in your face. 
“He made me feel special too.” Her words, full of venom as they left her lips, triggered something in your brain.
Flashbacks of your first day in the Devildom came rushing back. Specifically what Satan had said after Mammon made his grand entrance.
“Whenever he takes a liking to someone, they suddenly find themselves awash in money. But from what I hear, if he decides to break it off with someone, that wealth evaporates. They��re left without a Grimm to their name.”
The memory made your chest feel heavy. 
Could that pertain to people as well? They said a pure soul is like a shiny gem. What if..
“Everything he’s said to you, he probably already said to me.” She spat.
Your head was spinning, a knot forming in your throat. Her earlier words replaying in your mind.
“As soon as he gets tired of you, he’ll move on to the next one.”
What if..? No.. He wouldn’t do that...would he?
You quickly got so lost in thought as anxiety started to take root, plaguing you with ‘what ifs’ and hypotheticals, that you almost didn’t notice when someone stepped between you and the succubus. Putting a hand on either side of your face, he tilted your head up to look at him. Irises the color of tropical waters, instantly melt away your anxiety, calming the angry sea inside you.
“Let’s go home.” He whispered with a smile. His voice was soft, but you could see the anger in his eyes. He slung an arm around your shoulders and turned to start walking toward the House of Lamentation.
“We weren’t done talking.” She said vindictively.
“Don’t ya have anythin’ better to do?” Mammon snarled, glaring at the succubus.
She scoffed and rolled her eyes, leaving with her friends.
By the immense tension you could feel between them, you could tell that they had indeed been together at some point.
The walk home was quiet, which left you with ample time for your thoughts to run wild. 
Did she know him like you do? His little habits and his favorite things? 
Did she stick up for him when his brothers were dogging on him? Or afterward when he was down, did she try her best to drown out their hateful words with affirmations of love?
Did she play with his hair while he laid on her stomach, arms wrapped tight around her middle after he loved her? Hold her in his lap as he rubbed soothing circles on her back when she was sad? Whisper sweet nothings to her when he thought she was asleep?
...Did he love her?
-
“Whoa! Did ya see that, MC?!”
The two of you were curled up on the couch in Mammon’s room, watching a movie on his projector, just like you did every week.
Did they do movie night?
It shouldn’t be bothering you. Of course he’s had other partners. He’s been alive for thousands of years.
And you’ve had other partners. So what? No biggie. That wasn’t the issue.
The thought of him saying the same things, doing the same things with someone else...loving someone else, is what bothered you. It hurt to think that maybe you really weren’t that special; another weak, insignificant human, just like all the rest.
But the things she said kept playing on a loop in your head.
“As soon as he gets tired of you, he’ll move on to the next one.”
“He made me feel special too.”
Could she be right?
“Babe, are ya okay?” He had paused the movie and was now staring at you expectantly.
“Hmm? Oh, yeah I’m fine.” He saw through it quickly.
“Ya know, you’re not good at lyin’. What’s wrong? If ya don’t like the movie we can watch someth-”
“That girl earlier, at RAD? Is she your ex?” You didn’t want to bring it up, but you had to know before your thoughts could torment you further.
His face fell and he sighed heavily. “I was wonderin’ when you were gonna say somethin’..”
You remained quiet, watching his face, waiting for him to begin talking.
“We were together a long, long, time ago. Nothin’ serious. I broke it off when I realized she was only around for what she could get outta me. She didn’t take it too well.” He explained, his expression turning sour. “She had a different story, huh?”
“She didn’t say much really, except once you get tired of me you’ll move onto the next one. That I’m nothing special because everything you say to me you’ve probably said to her.” You said, keeping your eyes down as you fidget with the hem on your shirt.
He started laughing.
Your head snapped up, looking at him in shock.
“What’s so funny, Mammon?” You asked, getting a little irritated by his reaction. He stopped laughing when he looked at you and realized you were serious.
“Ya don’t actually believe her, do ya?” He scoffed, getting offended.
“No? I don’t know..” You replied, not meeting his gaze. Of course you wanted to believe him, but you already felt like you weren’t good enough for him, and that succubi’s words just watered the seeds of insecurity in your brain and helped them flourish.
You had always been the opposite of his brothers. You always believed Mammon, even when everyone else was against him. You were always on his side. Ready to stick up for him no matter what. To hear you now, was like a slap in the face.
Mammon’s face distorted in pain. And anger.
“What? Whaddya mean ya don’t know?” His voice was soft, “Ya don’t trust me?” He asked, meeting your gaze.
“Mammon, that’s-”
He shook his head. “No, I get it. A few bitter words from some random demon and now my words mean nothin’. “ He jumped up from the couch, making a beeline for the door.
“What about the last few months, huh? After all the time we spent together you think I’d do somethin’ like that to ya?” His voice cracked on the last sentence. He paused; hand on the knob as he stared at the door. You heard a small sniffle as his other hand came up to angrily wipe his face.
“I thought ya knew me better than anyone.” His voice was barely audible, but you could hear the hurt. He felt betrayed.
And with that he left, slamming the door behind him.
When he didn’t come back after an hour and wouldn’t answer your calls, you grabbed a few things and headed to your room. You still felt uneasy about the whole “his ex confronting you” thing and after what had just happened, you just wanted to be alone. 
Your bed seemed huge and your room felt odd. It’s not like you didn’t spend time in there anymore, you just didn’t usually do so alone. The silence was deafening.
I shouldn't have doubted him. He used to try and hide his feelings, although he was bad at it. But since we got together, he doesn’t hide how he feels about us to anyone.
You thought of all the times his cheeks had flushed scarlet when you caught him staring at you. How he sits and endures scary movies because they’re your favorite. The way he will randomly bring you your favorite snacks or other little gifts because he was thinking about you. Relentlessly tickling you just to hear your bright, uninhibited laughter. That even in his sleep, he has to be constantly touching some part of you, or he gets restless. 
You slowly drifted off to sleep, with tears staining your cheeks.
-
“Have you seen Mammon?” 
He never came looking for you last night and he wasn’t at breakfast. He even skipped RAD.
Asmo shook his head, “Not since yesterday. Did something happen?”
You decided to fill him in with all the details. He is the Avatar of Lust after all, so surely he could give you some advice regarding love.
He gasped dramatically, “No she didn’t! What a tart!”
“I know I shouldn’t have doubted him. He’s never given me a reason to, but I don’t know. She just got in my head, I guess. Poked at some insecurities.” You explained. “I haven’t seen him since he stormed off.”
“He won’t pout for long, he never does.”
“It’s more than just pouting. I hurt him just like everyone else. He feels betrayed.” You said, voice small.
You just wanted to pepper his face with kisses and profusely apologize for ever doubting him. Why did you ever let some random succubus get to you like that? To make your trust for Mammon falter, even slightly. Did you honestly believe he would toss you aside after he got what he could out of you? Really? 
Satan said it too though, in the beginning. That when you’re with him you find yourself drowning in gifts and the like, but once he outgrows you, you’re left with nothing. That’s the Greed.
You refuse to accept it though.
You know Mammon, better than anyone. He has changed so much since you came here. He’s not the same demon he used to be. He is more than just his sin.
“When he is ready, he’ll come back. He always does.” Asmo said, placing a hand on your shoulder, giving you a warm smile.
“Now, let’s go and change! You are depressing me and it’s ruining my skin. We are going out tonight!” He was practically vibrating with excitement. You, not so much.
“Ugh, no way Asmo. I’m not in a party mood.”
“Nonsense! It’s exactly what you need. We will have some drinks and dance and you’ll feel better. You’ll see.”
You relented, knowing that once Asmo got his mind set on something like this, there was no getting out of it. Maybe a few drinks really would make you feel better.
-
“Trouble in paradise?” She said, motioning to the drink in his hand.
His clothes were dishevelled, his hair mussed, eyes red-rimmed and puffy. He looked like he’d been through the wringer. Felt like it too. He’d been in the private lounge at the club for a little while now, nursing drink after drink, attempting to drown his sorrows.
“Go away.” He growled, turning his attention back to his drink.
“Is that anyway to greet an old friend?” She asked innocently.
“Nah, but it is a good way to greet a snake.”
“Ouch.” She put a hand over her heart, feigning hurt feelings.
“Haven’t ya caused enough problems? Leave me alone.”
She scoffed, plopping down onto the couch next to him.  “Oh, come on Mammon. You’re this hung up over a human?”
“Don’t talk about MC.” He snarled. In one big gulp, he swallowed the remainder of his drink. No matter what kind of situation the two of you were in, he wouldn’t let someone, anyone, say anything cross about you. At all.
“Oh, come on. You can’t seriously say you don’t miss being with me. A demon.” She leaned in close, her lips next to his ear, “Not nearly as fragile as a human. You can be as rough as you want..” She purred.
He jumped up from where he’d been sitting, attempting to get away from the succubus. “Get the fuc- Whoa.” He slurred, staggering slightly before quickly sitting back down, head lolling back to rest on the back of the couch. His vision was pretty blurry; the room spinning. He closed his eyes, hoping it’d help. 
Even in his deeply inebriated state, you were all that was on his mind. The feel of your hand running through his hair, lightly scratching at his scalp. The warmth of your body pressed against his, your lips; soft and delicate like rose petals, leaving small kisses across his face before finally meeting his lips. The bubbly sound of your laughter, beautiful like music. The way your eyes shine every time you see him, even if he only left your side for a tiny moment. 
After the fight you had and leaving the way he did, and now being away from you a whole day, not hearing your voice, feeling your touch, he was ready to go crazy. And although he did sneak back into the house after he was sure everyone was asleep, and slept in the backseat of his car so no one would find him, it wasn’t the same as sleeping next to you. He missed you.
But, it was more than that. He felt so incredibly stupid for reacting the way he had. If he were in your situation, and felt how you did, he would’ve had questions too. You love him, and all you wanted was a little reassurance that he in fact does love you. Man, does he love you. More than he’s ever loved anyone or anything.
With the attention span of a tuna sandwich, mixed with the levels of alcohol in his system, and being so deep in his thoughts of you, he hadn’t noticed the sudden shift of weight in his lap.
One hand found its way to the back of his head, fingers tangling in his hair. The other hand resting on his chest, slowly moving down his stomach, intently feeling every muscle. His mouth opened slightly, a breathy sigh escaping. He had missed you so much, your touch lighting his skin ablaze, craving you more and more.
Your hand moved lower, earnestly caressing his growing stiffness. Your lips crashed into his suddenly; hungrily, your tongue brushing his bottom lip. His hands moved up your thighs before firmly gripping your hips, grinding you against him.
Small alarm bells were going off in his head, something didn’t seem right. You didn’t giggle like you always do when he grabs your hips. Your kisses seemed sloppier than usual too.
He tried opening his eyes, blinking lazily several times. The room was still swirling around in his drunkenness, making it nearly impossible to focus.
Your hand moved to his pants, undoing the button and zipper. He removed a hand from your hip and grabbed your wrist, but didn’t attempt to move your hand from his swollen boxers. As he was about to break the kiss and suggest heading home and picking up with this make up where you left off, he heard a voice nearby.
“What the hell?!” They shrieked. 
Asmo?
“Mammon..?” You barely choked out.
That was your voice. He’d recognize it anywhere; the musical sound gently floating into his ears as it always did. But you sounded like you were crying..
And it didn’t come from the figure straddling his lap. How is that possible? He’s been making out with you, getting pretty heated actually, for the last several minutes.
He broke the kiss with you, confusedly turning to his left and blinking several times until his surroundings started to come into focus.
There you stood in the doorway of the private lounge with Asmo next to you, your eyes wide as s tears streamed down your cheeks, gaping at him in horror.
The alarm bells that had been going off, the red flags popping up trying to warn him that something wasn’t quite right, were about to become very clear.
- part two coming soon! -
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doctorstethoscope · 3 years
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Moment || Aaron Hotchner x gn Reader
A/N: hiiii besties expanding on a lil prompt from the weekend due to popular demand! Thank you to @the-modernmary for  helping me with it!! If u liked this teeny bit of angst u will love her fics!!
just a little note for those of you who read The Right: I am going on vacation this coming Saturday-Wednesday. I will have the chapters queued to post for y’all, but I will not be able to respond to taglist requests or update the masterlist until I come back! Still let me know what you think about the chapters though, they’re some good ones! ok onto this fic.
contains: slight cursing, alcohol consumption
wc: 1.7k
You take a deep breath as you walk out of Strauss’s office, taking exactly one beat to regain your composure before hastily making your way over to Hotch’s office, letting yourself in without knocking. 
“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me,” you said by way of greeting as you crossed his office and settled into one of the chairs across from his desk.
“Tell you what?” Hotch asks, looking up from his paperwork with confusion knit across his brow. 
“That Strauss was going to harangue me the second I walked into the building this morning. I seriously didn’t even make it past security before she nabbed me.” You told him, disgruntled. 
“I didn’t know. What did she want?” Aaron asks, and you look up and see that he’s telling the truth-- he really didn’t know. 
“Oh… I assumed she would have cleared it with you before she asked me.” You said, your boisterous energy deflating the longer you sat in the chair. 
“Is she pulling you for undercover work? She always does that, and she never asks if we have anything coming up or what your consult workload is--” 
“No, Hotch. She’s, uh, she’s not pulling me for undercover work.”
“What is it?” 
“She said the director tapped me to lead the field office in Vegas.” You confessed, looking up and seeing the air leave Aaron’s chest. 
“Wow.” Aaron says, blinking. 
“Yeah,” you agreed. 
“And you’re going to take it?” He asked. 
“I told her that I needed some time to think about it.” You answer him.
“What’s there to think about?” He wonders. 
There’s a moment where you think you might actually roll your eyes at him. There’s a moment where you consider begging him to give you a reason to stay. There’s a moment where you consider crossing the desk and depositing yourself in his lap, kissing him with the weight of all of the feelings that had you wanting to stay. 
But, after a moment, you realize that none of that’s happening. He’s sitting across from you, looking at you like you’d be the biggest fool in the world not to take advantage of this opportunity, and maybe he was right. Maybe you would spend the rest of your life wanting him one-sidedly, wondering what good you could have done for the world if you had simply accepted that he’d never love you back. 
“Nothing,” you answered, after a moment. “There’s absolutely nothing to think about at all.”
****************************
Aaron’s barely even distracted when you swing his door open and plop yourself into one of his chairs first thing in the morning. He’s used to it, by now. He may have been a less-than-willing participant in your friendship at the beginning of your relationship, but now he was glad to call you someone he was close to. His closest friend, really. 
His ears perk up when you mention Strauss. “Is she pulling you for undercover work?’ He starts to rant, already planning the tirade he’s going to deliver to Erin when he notices your demeanor change. You’re… shy, all of a sudden. You’ve never hidden from him before. He doesn’t like it. 
“She said the director tapped me for the field director position in Vegas,” You revealed. The sentence hit him like a punch in the gut.
“Wow,” is all he can manage to get out, fighting the way his throat threatens to close up. “And you’re going to take it?” He asks, although he knows the answer will break his heart. 
“I told her I needed some time to think about it.”
“What’s there to think about?’ He asked, allowing himself to hope for a moment that you’ll make some grand confession, to imagine for a moment that you might possibly feel the same way he does, to believe for a moment that he’s worthy of your love. But he’s not.
“Nothing. There’s absolutely nothing to think about at all,” you tell him, standing up and leaving with a forced casualness. 
Aaron had been married long enough to know that that tone and those words together mean the exact opposite of what they are supposed to mean-- but he was still confused. What could possibly make you stay? And how could he find it before you left? 
*****************
The following days between you and Aaron had been chilly, to say the least. You didn’t bounce ideas off of each other on cases like you normally would. You came to the opposite conclusions at every turn. You were out of sync, and everyone felt it. So when the case wrapped up on a Friday afternoon, you were more than happy to rush home to a bottle of wine, a pint of ice cream, your moving boxes and some trashy reality television.
You’d given up on packing after about an hour. Your heart just wasn’t in it. So instead, you lounged in your pajamas, sipping at your wine in the hopes that it would guide you to your first full night of sleep since you’d spoken with Strauss. You’re just about to head to bed when there’s a knock at your door. You swing it open, revealing Aaron, holding a bouquet of flowers in one hand and a bottle of champagne in the other. 
“I was an asshole.” He offers. “Am I interrupting anything, or?”
“Just packing,” you say, wanting to twist the knife a little bit even if it wasn’t truthful. Aaron is undeterred, and steps inside anyways. 
“I didn’t want you to leave with us still in the middle of the fight. You can be as mad as you want in the morning, but have a glass of champagne with me?” He asks, with those big brown eyes you could never refuse. 
“Fine,” you sighed, still easily won over by him, even when you were heartbroken and mad. 
“Here, you open it. Congratulations,” he tells you, handing over the bottle. You start picking at the foil, and he speaks up in the silence. “Things are going to be different without you, you know. I like that our team is structured the way it is… as a team, but you know, in a lot of ways, it was nice to have a partner in you.”
“You know, come to think of it, I’m not sure if I even have cups. They might be packed away,” you say, still picking at the foil and decidedly not looking Aaron in the eye. He chuckles a little at your comment.
 “I don’t know what I’m going to do when you’re gone. I mean, who else can rein in Derek, or get to see me the big picture, or talk Emily off the ledge when I’m sure she’s about to go rogue?’ 
“It’s going to be okay,” you tell him, setting the bottle on the counter, still unopened. Aaron heaves a sigh. 
“You should stay.” He says, after a moment. 
“What?” You say, blinking, because surely you must be drunk or dreaming or something else. 
“You should stay here. You don’t have to take the job in Vegas.” 
“Haha, very funny,” you joked, bringing your attention back to the bottle to avoid looking him in the eye. 
“I’m serious. Listen, I know I said there was nothing to think about, but I changed my mind.” 
“Oh, did you? And what if I haven’t changed mine?” You asked, getting angry now. 
Not able to hold back for another second, he takes your face in both of his hands and kisses you. “Just, think about that before you board a plane. Okay?” He says, and before you can even speak, you hear the door swing shut behind him. 
Damn you, Hotchner. 
You don’t sleep a wink.  When 8am finally rolls around, you pull yourself out of bed and get dressed, heading over to Aaron’s. As you buckle your seatbelt, you realize that you know you have to go over there but you have no clue what it is you even want to say to him. You hope you’ll figure it out without sounding completely insane as you knock on Aaron’s door, and he swings it open, still in his sweatpants and incredibly surprised to find you on his doorstep.
“I’m even more mad at you right now than I was last night,” you tell him by way of greeting.
“That’s understandable. I haven’t been very fair to you,” he agrees, and the fact that he’s being so reasonable only makes you angrier. You slip past him and step inside the apartment. 
“I don’t get it. You couldn’t just let me move on, start a new life and forget about the torch I’ve been burning for my boss the entire time I’ve worked here? You had to have the last word, even if I was leaving forever.” 
“No,” Aaron says, and you bite your tongue, trying to allow him a moment to respond even if you weren’t feeling all that gracious. “No, I couldn’t let you move on thinking the torch you were carrying ws unrequited.”
You’re struck by his words. “What are you trying to say?” 
“I’m sorry, it doesn’t matter. It’s a great opportunity for you in Vegas. I’m happy for you, and you shouldn’t let this--” 
“Hotch, what are you trying to say?”
“Just that I’m proud of you, and I know that you’ll do excellent work, and--”
“I don’t understand what you’re trying to hide from me.” You call him out, and he looks at you for a moment. This time, you don’t break his glance. 
“I’m not trying to hide. I’m just too late.” He tells you, looking down at the floor. 
“Tell me, Hotchner. Tell me, please.” You beg of him, shifting to try to get him to look you in the eye.
“I love you, and I figured it out too late.” 
You draw in a sharp breath, and he’s sure he’s ruined any vestiges of friendship that still existed between the two of you in this moment, and that you’ll board your plane to Las Vegas and he’ll become a creepy old boss that you never think about again. He takes a moment to look at you, a moment to mourn what might have been, a moment to remember the way your laugh made him smile while the memories were still fresh. He takes a moment, and then you speak up.
“No,” you correct him. “You figured it out just in time.”
tagging: @choppa-style @wanniiieeee @zheezs14 @torykjamie @maureen4y
@ssavanessa22 @isthatme-thatsme @g-l-pierce @ssahotchie @infinite-tides
 @itsmytimetoodream @averyhotchner @msmarvelsmain @hotforhotchner11 @hotchinkevlar
hi besties I tried to tag everyone who said they wanted to be on my regular hotch list and a few of y’all who regularly interact with the right but if i made a mistake/u want to be removed u can lmk I will not be offended!!!
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SH - Sherlock x Depressed!Reader - With a Little Help from My Friends - Words: 2,793
IMPORTANT A/N - PLEASE READ: As stated in the title, this story contains discussions of depression. There is mention of suicidal thought and self-harm. I personally don't think it's too intense in it's descriptions HOWEVER!!! If this will trigger you, for your own health and safety please do not read. My messages are always open if you'd like to talk. I wrote this partially based on my own feelings so I can understand to at least a degree. You're amazing and I love you all. As far as this story goes, just remember: it has a happy, very fluffy ending but it doesn't start that way. I hope you enjoy it, feel free to leave a comment!
Brief Backstory: Reader is friends with John and Sherlock. She is a nurse who works with John. The three met shortly after Sherlock came back. Sherlock and Reader have crushes on each other but won't admit to it. I think the story explains everything else.
"Y/N, I'm going to be honest," John said, putting his hand on your shoulder comfortingly. "I may have PTSD but I cannot fully put myself in your shoes. My depression is different than yours." You had called your best friend, John Watson, in a mild panic. You had been feeling depressed for some time, as he knew, but that day had been especially bad. There was no particular reason but your depression had gotten so intense that you knew you needed help to get past this particular wave. John invited you over to 221B, assuring you that his flatmate would be out for the next couple of hours. "As a doctor, I am going to prescribe you some medication. Lowest dose possible and only because I want to help you get some immediate relief but I know you do not want them to become permanent. Let's work on finding another solution for you, ok?"
"I don't know, John," you replied. You'd asked John to be your Doctor since you didn't go to one regularly and he didn't mind your irregular checkups. "I've tried just about everything. The only outlet that seems to help is writing and even then," you trailed off, trying not to cry again. "This feeling just won't go away and I don't even know why it's there in the first place. I just want it to stop."
"I think you should talk to Sherlock."
"What?" You squeaked. "Why in the world would I talk to Sherlock?"
"I can't tell you why, Y/N. As both your Doctor and Sherlock's, I have to respect certain amounts of patient confidentiality. However, as your friend, I think you should talk to him."
"I don't know."
"Trust me," He replied. Smirking slightly, he added, "Doctor's orders."
"Ok, John," you chuckled. He smiled and hugged you. "Thanks."
"Now how about we go and fill this prescription and then maybe get some ice cream?"
"Well, honestly," you sighed. "The ice cream sounds great but I didn't sleep well last night. I was actually wondering if I could just take a nap here for a bit. I sleep better here sometimes." You blushed but John nodded understandingly.
"Of course," He replied. "I'll run down to the drugstore and fill this for you. Meanwhile you get some rest. I'll let Sherlock know you're here just in case he ends up getting back before I do. Will you be ok by yourself?"
"Yeah," You smiled. "This is a safe space for me. I'll go grab a blanket. Thanks again."
"Don't mention it. Just remember, talk to him."
"I'll try."
About 15 minutes later, Sherlock arrived back at the flat. He'd gotten John's texts.
John: If you get home in the next 45 minutes, be quiet. Y/N is over and she's taking a nap. I have to run out for something.
Sherlock: Is everything ok? - SH
John: She said she had a bad night.
Sherlock: She must have had a reason to come over in the first place though. - SH
John: She's going to need to tell you that herself. Don't ask. Do you understand me? Let her tell you. Be nice, ok?
Sherlock: When am I not nice to Y/N? - SH
John: Ok, that is true. You like her too much to be rude to her. If you could just hold back your deductions for one second I will say this: you two have more in common than you think.
He hurried home, not to wake you up of course, but because he wanted to see you. If there was something seriously wrong, he wanted to try and brace himself for it first. He couldn't help the smile playing at the corner of his lips when he thought of you. You two were good friends, that much was obvious to everyone. But Sherlock could see the potential for something more. He liked you a lot. You were just as smart, sassy, and sarcastic as he was. But you also could be extremely kind and caring to others and especially to him. He still didn't quite understand why you cared for him so but he was grateful. Before he could dwell on that too much longer, he arrived at 221B.
He quietly slipped inside and smiled at what he saw. You were curled up on the couch, sleeping like a baby. Apparently, though, you'd kicked off the blanket you had grabbed. Instead of picking up the blanket, he decided to take off his long coat and carefully lay that over you. You quickly cuddled into the warm fabric, unconsciously taking a deep breath, inhaling his unique signature left behind on the coat. Satisfied with what he'd done, he took off his suit jacket and went to the kitchen to prepare some tea for when you woke up. He knew you had a favorite tea and, unless John moved it or drank it all, there still would be some in the cupboard.
You woke to the smell of your favorite tea and a hushed exclamation from the kitchen. Opening your eyes slowly you saw Sherlock in at the counter trying to set up a tray with the teapot and cups. Recognizing your surroundings a bit more, you realized what was on top of you. Sherlock was just about to bring out the tray but you decided to pretend you were still asleep. The chances of fooling the Detective were low, but you wanted to try.
"There," He whispered to himself, setting the tray on the coffee table. You could hear him settling down on his chair, likely getting into his 'palace pose' as you called it. For a moment you were happy. You had actually gotten some quality sleep, you were currently cuddled up in Sherlock's famous coat and Sherlock had even made you tea. But that feeling quickly faded. Tears threatened to spill out of your still closed eyes as self-deprecating thoughts filled your mind.
'John probably told him to make me tea. He probably covered me with his coat so I wasn't as much of a distraction. He doesn't want me here. He never does. Why does he even tolerate my presence? He probably wishes we'd never met,' You thought. Your mind was going a million miles an hour and gaining. Without your notice, the tears began rolling down your cheeks and quiet sobs escaped your lips.
"Y/N?" Sherlock whispered. You're eyes shot open. You hadn't heard him get up. Now he was kneeling right next to you, one hand hovering over your arm. "Are you ok?"
"Oh, Sherlock!" You cried. "I-I wish I knew."
"C'mere," he said, motioning for you to sit up. Once you did so, he pulled you into a tight hug.
"What's this for?"
"You always give me and John a hug when you see us. You haven't done so for the past 5 days. I-" he paused briefly before lowering his voice and continuing. "I missed it."
"Oh." You weren't quite sure how to reply to that. You leaned into his embrace, letting yourself get lost in the moment.
"Y/N? Is there something I can do to help?"
"How much did John tell you?" You asked. You wouldn't have been mad exactly if John had told Sherlock to talk to you, but you wanted to think Sherlock was reaching out on his own.
"He told me you had a bad night."
"That's all?" You asked, surprised. You pulled away slightly and stared into his eyes. Sherlock nodded, frowning slightly as he tried to deduce you.
"Why are you afraid to talk to me?" You turned away, embarrassed and unsure what to say. "Be honest."
"I don't want you to make fun of me. I have-" You took a deep breath, steeling your nerves and preparing to just jump right in. "I have been extremely depressed lately and I didn't want to hear another speech about how all I need to do is exercise and eat right and stop thinking about sad things. Well you know what? I can't stop it! I can't help it if I feel like a useless pile of trash that should be thrown in the bin and burned." By the time you finished your little tirade, you'd gotten up and started pacing the floor. Then you turned and faced Sherlock. His expression was neutral but there was an obvious sadness in his eyes, one you didn't expect to see. It wasn't of pity. If you had seen that you also would have given up on the conversation. No, it was almost an understanding, an empathy. His eyes were actually glistening with tears.
"Have you ever felt like," he paused, voice unsteady. "Like giving up?" He whispered, unable to hold eye contact. You nodded silently. He got up slowly and walked towards you. At first, you thought he would hug you again but then he started unbuttoning his shirt.
"Uh, Sherlock?"
"Just wait a moment. I want to show you something." He carefully shrugged off the purple shirt that you, admittedly, loved so much and tossed it on the chair. "Only one person knows about this. You will be the second. You remember I told you about Moriarty's network?"
"Yes, the day we met. I asked you about your work, a simple question. And I got an answer that lasted 3 hours." Sherlock chuckled dryly.
"Yeah, sorry about that."
"Oh, no. Please don't apologise. I-" You sighed, rubbing your forehead. "I tend to make jokes when I'm nervous."
"I know." He smiled at you with, yet again, a completely unreadable expression. "You remember though." You nodded, opting to stay silent as he explained. "Well, those 2 years dismantling his network weren't easy. Not physically and certainly not emotionally. As a result of the different missions, I received many wounds on my body in various locations. I was," He paused, took a deep breath, and closed his eyes. "I was depressed, guilt-stricken and suicidal. I figured I had hurt my friends enough. If they thought I was dead maybe I should just go on with it."
"What changed your mind?"
"I didn't want to do it on a mission. I wanted to see home again one more time. So to temporarily relieve the pain I," He sighed. Well, I wouldn't let my wounds heal. I'd pick at them. Mycroft finally convinced me to come back officially because he needed my help. I never told him about this. I think he knows but we don't discuss it." He looked down, obviously embarrassed and feeling more emotionally naked than physically. "You can look," he said. It was as if he'd read your mind. You were trying to be respectful and not stare but you realized that's what he wanted to show you. You had, on occasion, seen him shirtless before but you had never realized how bad some of the scars were.
"Sherlock, I-I don't know what to say. I-" You were completely shocked. Not offended. But actually comforted that he understood you. "Thank you," You finally said.
"Actually I wanted to thank you. I didn't just show you this to prove that I understand your feelings." You looked at him confused. "The day we met. You were leaving work, correct?" You nodded.
"It had been my first day there. John had been happy with my work and requested that I stay assigned to his office permanently. John had already finished up and headed home but there was some paperwork I had to finish so I was leaving about an hour late. Come to think of it, John said he had plans with you that evening. Why were you there?"
"That's what I wanted to tell you. I met you less than a month after I came back. I had still been quite depressed so I was still picking at my injuries. That day had been a bad day for me. So I cancelled my plans with John and I decided to go back to where I started this whole mess and finish it."
"Wait, are you telling me that-"
"You saved my life." Sherlock took one of your hands in his own and held it tightly. "I had memorized the work schedules of most everyone there and knew how to slip in unnoticed."
"But you didn't factor in me."
"Correct. When I ran into you, quite literally in fact, as I was entering the building, I was surprised. Not just by your presence but by what I deduced about you. You intrigued me. I had to find out more about you so I invited you to have a cup of coffee with me."
"Which turned into dinner." Sherlock nodded. "And since you were so intrigued by me, you forgot all about that."
"In a manner of speaking. You weren't a cure-all, mind you. You helped, though, by giving me a new mystery to investigate: you. That night, when I got home, I told John everything. He helped me too and when I mentioned you he couldn't stop singing your praises. He is very proud of you and your work you know."
"Yeah, I guess so," You replied, a little embarrassed. "Thank you, Sherlock. I'm sorry that you went through all that, but, I'm glad I have someone who understands. And I'm glad you're here to help me."
"Me too, Y/N. Me too," He replied.
"Can I, um, can I have another hug?" You asked, blushing and smiling. Sherlock rolled his eyes.
"If you must," He sighed, holding his arms out. Any other day, you would have thought he genuinely didn't want personal contact. But today you realized he was simply teasing. You wrapped your arms around his waist and leaned your head on his chest. You felt him relax as he leaned forward a little to cocoon you in his arms. "I care about you, Y/N. I don't care about many people but you mean so much to me. I-" You looked up at him and pressed a finger to his lips to quiet him.
"You don't have to say it, Sherlock. I know." He smiled and looked somewhat relieved. You knew he wasn't good with feelings and that was fine with you. "I love you too."
"I wanted to be the first one to say that," He pouted. You chuckled softly and booped his nose.
"You already have." He smiled and kissed your forehead lightly.
"I know this won't fix everything right away. I know you'll still have bad days. But I wanted you to know you could come to me too."
"I know. Thank you again, Sherlock." At that moment, John walked in with a bag from the store.
"Oh, hello!" He chirped, happy to see you hadn't gotten into a yelling match. Then he noticed Sherlock's shirt, or rather, lack thereof. "So, uh," He stuttered, unsure of what to say. "What should I do with this?"
"First of all, thank you, John, for giving me the guts to talk to him about this. And second, I think I'll give it a try. You know, to try and prevent a really bad day when you guys aren't available or if talking still isn't enough. But for today I think I'll be alright," You said, turning to John with a smile.
"Well, I'm glad. So did you just talk about that or did he finally tell you that he's had the biggest schoolboy crush on you from the moment he met you?"
"John!" Sherlock yelled. You laughed loudly.
"Not in those words exactly, John," You replied. "Don't worry," You added, turning to Sherlock and ruffling his curls. "Your secret's safe with me."
"Good. Now if you don't mind, I need your input on this case."
"Me?" You asked, quite surprised.
"Yes," He said as if it was obvious. "You're a woman after all!"
"And that is important because?"
"The killer was a woman obviously but I can't understand why she would do it!" The two of you went off into your own little world, completely ignoring John as he cooked dinner.
John: Ok, mates, get your tuxs out. Won't be long now.
Greg: He finally proposed? 😀
John: Not yet, give it a week.
Mycroft: John, you forget I monitor his spending habits.
John: And?
Mycroft: He's had a ring purchased for some time now.
Greg: 3 days tops.💍
Mycroft: I would estimate about 3 days as well, Detective Inspector.
Greg: We're in a Group Text. Talking about our friend like a bunch of teenage girls at a slumber party. I think you can call me Greg.
Mycroft: If I must.
John: So, girls, will you help me make the plans?
Mycroft: Of course. He is blood after all.
Greg: Count me in! Wouldn't miss it! 🕵️👰
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forever-rogue · 3 years
Note
OH I HAVE AN IDEA like an angsty fic where bucky and reader have a miscommunication and it causes a fight between them and they are both like ???? “we’ve never yelled at each other ??? what is this” AND IDK I JUST WANT ANGST
So, head empty, very little thoughts, but I hope this works and you like it 🥺
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
You sang along to the music that was playing softly in the background as you showered and got ready for your day. You’d had a late start, easily giving into Bucky and staying in bed for just five more minutes, which had really turned out to be almost another hour. The good thing about being the boss was that you could afford to be late every once in a while. Bucky was in the kitchen, whipping up a quick breakfast before he too needed to leave and go about his day.
“Sugar,” he called out to you as you washed your hair. You could faintly make out his voice as you carried on, but figured you’d be able to make out what he was saying well enough, “I’ve got everything made and prepared just how you like it!”
You thought nothing of it for a moment and continued to wash your hair; but about halfway through the motions, you stopped in surprise. What had he actually said?
“Bucky? Bub, what did you say?” you quickly rinsed out our hair before pulling back the shower curtain as you tried to listen in. Had he really said he was mad?
“It’s all done! I’m done,” he called back as he covered your plate for you to find once you got out of the shower. He grabbed his travel mug of coffee and headed towards the door, giving Alpine a quick pet before leaving, “bye honey. Running late and gotta go - I’m leaving!”
“Bucky!” you almost slipped and fell as you tore back the shower curtain and almost jumped out of the shower. It was still running as you haphazardly grabbed a towel and darted down the hall and into the kitchen. But he was already gone; the only thing that was left behind was the faint smell of his cologne. Swallowing the nervous lump in your throat, you trudged back down the hall to finish your shower. You were already running late and whatever this was - whatever had just happened - would need to wait until later.
Had Bucky really just broken up with you in the midst of a shower? It sure seemed like it right now.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
A heavy sigh escaped your lips as you sat down and stared at your computer screen. You’d had the same spreadsheets and charts pulled up for the last two hours and made almost no progress. You swore that almost every single interaction you’d had with Bucky over the last week was playing on loop in your mind. You were desperately trying to figure out where you’d gone wrong, what had caused him to snap.
In an effort to alleviate your own fears, you’d texted Bucky to get a response from him and see what was going on. But you hadn’t heard back from him. You’d sent three messages before deciding not to bombard him. But still...if he was just up and leaving you after almost three years together, he owed you at least a small explanation.
You opened google and quickly pulled up an apartment search, already resigned yourself to the idea that you’d need to find a new place fast. Being around for too long would be too hard and you didn’t want to subject to more torture than necessary. And Alpine! You’d need to decide what to do with your beloved cat - Alpine loved you equally, how were you to choose who would get the fluffy little thing? And all the friends in common you shared...who would they side with?
“Fuck,” you groaned at nothing in particular and decided to focus on your work. At least that would keep you distracted and your brain focused on something other than Bucky. You would figure out everything else tonight. It would all be fine. This was no big deal; maybe your world was falling apart...but you would handle it. You always did.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
When you finally allowed yourself to go home that evening, you were shocked to find the lights on and Bucky in the kitchen. He was on the phone with someone, his new girlfriend or someone like that you immediately presumed, moving about the kitchen as he finished dinner. You choked up as you watched the domestic scene that was so normal to you by now. But this time, it felt so wrong.
You stormed in and for whatever reason, you decided that grabbing a pillow and throwing it at Bucky was a good idea. You picked the soft thing up in your arms and hurled at him, who suddenly realized you were home and yelped in surprise as he dodged the offending object. He raised his eyebrows in surprise as he pointed to the earbuds in ears as he turned back to the stove.
You were seeing red by now as you stormed in the kitchen and ripped his earbuds out. He was so stunned by your sudden actions, he jumped back and offered up a shocked look.
“What the fuck are you doing here!?” you shouted at him as you threw the buds on the floor, half tempted to stomp them, “how fucking dare you!”
“Sugar, what on earth are you talking about?” he grabbed his phone off the counter and ended the call without hesitation. Your chest heaved as you waited for some sort of explanation, “what’s going on? Are you alright?”
“No, I’m not alright! How on earth could I be alright?” you threw your hands up in exasperation as you tried to unsuccessfully hold back your tears. He was so calm and nonchalant about everything it was almost more frustrating than anything else.
“Okay...something is going on. Care to enlighten me?” he tried to reach up and wipe your tears away but you flinched out of his touch, “sugar?”
“Y-you! It’s you!” you cried softly as he motioned for you to explain just what it was about him that was the problem.
“What about me…?”
“You just break up with me this morning and tell me you’re leaving me and then you just come back like nothing has happened?” as soon as the words left your mouth, Bucky’s mouth dropped open. It was news to him that he’d broken up with you, “and you didn’t answer my texts all day! I deserve some sort of explanation!”
“I didn’t...I didn’t break up with you, Sugar,” he stated simply as you tilted to your head in confusion, trying to decide if he was pulling your leg or being honest, “why would I leave you? That makes no sense. I love you - I’m in love with you!”
“This morning,” you whispered softly, “you said you were done and you were leaving. When I was in the shower.”
His brows furrowed as he tried to figure out what exactly you were talking about. But then it hit him and he struggled not to burst out laughing. He gnawed on his lip as he fervently shook his head, “my sweet girl, you...well you heard me correctly, but incorrectly at the same time.”
“What? I-I swear…”
“What I said was breakfast was done and that I was leaving for work because I was running late too,” he explained as you tried to replay all that you had heard. Maybe...maybe you hadn’t heard him correctly at all - and in turn jumped to the worst possible conclusion, “I had to run...I’m sorry I didn’t come into the bathroom and say goodbye. Maybe that would have solved this whole thing.”
“You’re not..leaving me?” you asked as he just shook his head and took the opportunity to wrap his arms around you, “you still love me?”
“I find it both hilarious and concerning that you so easily thought I would just leave,” he kissed the top of your head as you held onto him as tightly as possible, “of course I’m not leaving. You never have to worry about that, sugar. I love you so much, silly girl. You sweet, silly girl.”
“I’m an absolute idiot,” you mumbled as you buried your face in his shoulder. You couldn’t believe that you jumped from A to Z so quickly and without a moment of hesitation, “I’m sorry, Bub. I feel like I wouldn’t blame you if you did want to leave me now.”
“Never,” he promised softly, “even if you do have moments of being ridiculous. Just like I do.”
“If I ever do something so dumb again,” you huffed as you pulled back and looked at those ocean eyes, “just smack some sense into me. But I...you didn’t answer my texts.”
“Texts?” he seemed genuinely confused as he reached for his phone and correctly scrolled through his messages. You could see that there were none from you, “what are you…I was in bad reception today. Blame Sam, that I was just on the phone with, for that one. They probably never came through. I’m sorry, honey. If they’d come in, maybe we could have avoided this whole situation, huh?"
“Some bad luck on top of it,” you hid your face behind your hands and sighed heavily, “James. I..I’m so sorry for everything. I just downright acted like a fool today. I don’t even know where to begin to apologize. I love you, Bub. I hope you can forgive me, but if not...I would-”
“Hey,” he put his hand under chin and turned your face up to meet his own. His smile was lilting and gentle and his eyes soft, “I love you. It’s alright done and forgotten. Are you hungry? Dinner’s just about finished.”
“I love you more than anything,” you whispered as he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, “I just...my emotions were so all over the place today. Like out of control, A to Z. I don’t know what happened.”
“Shit happens,” he dismissed it with a slight scoff as he reached for some dishes, “I’m yours, sugar. Always.”
“Me too,” you agreed as you leaned against the counter, watching him with nothing but adoration. It was then that another realization - and possibly an explanation - hit you. It felt like a punch in the gut, “shit.”
“What?” Bucky asked as he started to plate dinner, “everything okay?”
“Yeah,” you smiled nervously, “just remembered something I forgot to do today.”
“As long as you’re alright…”
“I am,” you promised. You could worry about this later, “hey - I love you so much, Bucky. You know that right?”
“I love you too. Always.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
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babymetaldoll · 3 years
Text
DIWK: Chapter eleven: "Can't get you off my mind"
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|Word count:  9,7K
Summary:  Reader struggles with her feelings for Spencer and tries to work with Seaver. Neither of those things works. Spencer's headaches are getting worse. Also, it's Anderson's birthday! Things are getting a little more complicated.
Warnings:  Hardcore fools in love. It's getting painful to watch. Spoilers of Criminal Minds Season 6 Episode 11. 25 to life. Cursing, and frustration. Alcohol consumption. Assholes being blind.
A/N: Please don't hate me! but these two are just so blind, it hurts!
Masterlist
Chapter one | Chapter two | Chapter three | Chapter four | Chapter five | Chapter six | Chapter seven | Chapter eight | Chapter nine | Chapter ten | Chapter eleven | Chapter twelve | Chapter thirteen | Chapter fourteen | Chapter fifteen |
.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.
Spencer's point of view
Psychotics in a break always evolve. Well, I was psychotic at that minute of my life, but the only things evolving were my migraines. They were driving me insane. I could feel them taking over my life, my head, my sanity. I could feel my good judgment slipping through my fingers every day, especially since (Y/N) had started acting strange.
It wasn't like she had stopped talking to me or hanging out with me. But I could feel a void growing between us every day. And it was driving me insane. I couldn't understand where it had come from. I just knew it was eating me alive.
Morgan was having a bad day. One really bad day. The man he had vouched for parole had just murdered a man after nearly 70 hours of freedom, and now the team was trying to solve the whole case. Don Sanderson claimed he had been framed guilty of the murder of his wife and baby daughter, but after 25 years in prison, the first thing he did as a free man was to murder someone else.
It made no sense.
We had visited the murder scene. Hotch was still on a leave, so it was just Prentiss, (Y/N), Morgan, Rossi, Seaver, and I. Emily was in full "training agent's duty," walking Seaver through every step of the procedure, which was very nice of her. It was her first case after the incident in New Mexico, and she was eager to do better work than that time. She was nearly jumping all over the place, taking notes.
I talked with Garcia on the phone because he was worried about Morgan, and then I walked to (Y/N), who kept a safe distance from Emily and Seaver.
- "The bullets were in the other room, but the gun is right here,"- I said as I looked around the room. (Y/N) turned to me, ready to speak her mind, but Ashley spoke first, which annoyed her beyond belief.
- "Maybe killing him was an accident."
I looked at my best friend as Prentiss and Ashley continued talking. She just crossed her arms and walked around the room. She surely wasn't dealing well with having Seaver around. I wanted to ask her something, anything, but nothing came to mind.
- "Sanderson was out of prison for what, Reid?"- I answered Emily's question but didn't even turn to look at her. My eyes were following (Y/N), moving around that room.
- "At the time of the murder, 51 hours."
- "He's free for 2 days and change? What's the big hurry to find this guy?"
- "Are you ok?"- I whispered and stood next to (Y/N) as Prentiss and Ashley kept analyzing the scene.
- "Yeah, just tired."
- "Do you wanna have dinner with me tonight? I didn't see you this weekend, and I thought we could do a movie night."
(Y/N) took her time to answer, but finally, after a moment, she nodded and agreed.
- "Movie night sounds nice."
- "Great, ‘cos I rented your favorites."- I might have sounded more excited than I should, but I had really missed her those days, and I may or may not have watched and read Pride and Prejudice a couple of times.
- "Did you? Really?"
- "Yes, I was hoping to spend some time with you."
- "Are you coming, Spence?"- Seaver interrupted us and looked from the door- "Rossi called. They are interviewing Sanderson at the BAU."
- "Yeah, we are coming,"- I answered and looked away. (Y/N) shook her head and walked outside in silence the second Prentiss called my name, and I couldn't follow her. Which, I guess, was a good thing.
- "Is everything ok?"- Emily stayed behind with me. She raised an eyebrow, watching (Y/N) walking out of the room as Ashley waited for us by the door.
- "Yes?"- my answer came more as a question because I honestly didn't know what to say- "Everything is ok, Emily."
- "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I have the feeling (Y/N) isn't thrilled to have agent Seaver around."- I almost chuckled at her words and just nodded.
- "It's not like she has made it hard to tell. She literally yelled at her at the jet."
- "Is she mad at me because I am supervising her training?"
- "I don't know. I don't think so… she hasn't told me so. Well, she hasn't talked to me much lately."
- "Why? Did you fight?"- Prentiss wide opened her eyes and moved a little closer to me, trying to read my expressions.
- "No, I don't know what's going on. She just… we…"- I couldn't find the right words to explain my mind, and I think Prentiss knew it, ‘cos she didn't push me.
- "You should talk to her."
- "Yeah, we are going out tonight."
- "You have a date?"- Ashley walked over and asked me with a short smile. I cleared my throat and shook my head right away.
- "No, just meeting with a friend."
- "Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to intrude,"- Seaver blushed and looked at her shoes. Prentiss smiled, probably reading something I wasn't seeing.
- "Come on, Rossi is probably waiting for us at the BAU, and I'm guessing Morgan is not in a good mood."
For the rest of the day, I tried to find a moment alone with (Y/N). I needed to talk about what was going on. But it was impossible. We worked late, rereading the original case files, trying to find something that might help us help Sanderson. But it was frustrating and nearly impossible.
So around nine, we decided to call it a day and go home.
- "Are you in the mood for Chinese?"- I looked at (Y/N), gathering all the things as I stood next to her desk- I thought maybe we could get some take-out from that place you love on our way home.
- "Sounds nice. What are we watching?"
- "Pride and Prejudice, Coraline, maybe Beetlejuice. You pick, I've got all your favorites,"- (Y/N) narrowed her eyes, looking at me in silence- "What?"
- "So you rented movies ‘cos you wanted to hang out with me?"
- "Yes."
- "You usually don't rent movies. You rent documentaries."
- "Yes, but I wanted to do something different this time. I told you I missed you."
(Y/N) blushed as she stood in front of me, biting the inner part of her cheek, trying not to smile. I looked at her, nearly beaming, excited to see her reaction. I had felt so scared to lose her, feeling her pushing away from me. It was a balm watching her so happy, and just because I missed her.
- "I love Pride and Prejudice,"- Ashley said from her desk- "I've read that book so many times, I think I can recite it."
I looked at her and nodded with an awkward smile. I knew she was just trying to be nice ‘cos she was new at the BAU, and she was also trying to be nicer to (Y/N), to get on her good side. But that wasn't the way to get to her. Maybe I had to talk to Seaver and explain that my best friend is a special woman.
Neither of us answered her comment. We just stood there, looking at her in silence, until Anderson walked over and waved.
- "Hey agents, before you go, I wanted to tell you, this Friday I'm celebrating my birthday, and I'd love to have you over."
- "Of course, Sonny!"- (Y/N) wide opened her eyes and clapped. She had called him "Sonny" since they sang "I got you babe" by Sonny and Cher in the karaoke at the Christmas party the year before.
- "Happy birthday, Anderson!"- Derek waved.
- "Thank you! We'll gather at a bar nearby. I'll text you the address."
- "We wouldn't miss it for the world,"- Prentiss added and smiled- "Do you mind if we tell JJ and Garcia?"
- "Please do! I haven't seen JJ since she left, and it would be amazing to have her over. You too, agent Seaver."
- "Thank you!"- Ashley smiled and nodded- "Count me in."
I could feel (Y/N)'s eyes rolling, annoyed, even when I wasn't even looking at her at that minute. I grabbed my bag and my coat and held her hand.
- "Bye, guys! See you tomorrow!"- that was all I said as I dragged her out of the bullpen. Emily waved at us, and Derek cut me an evil grin I could decode easily. I just ignored him and turned to the door.
- "Have fun, pretty girl!!"- Morgan chuckled at his own words, and (Y/N) just smiled and winked. Why? Probably to show him she didn't care about all his teasing, ‘cos nothing was ever going to happen between us.
(Y/N)'s point of view
It might have been childish, but I had to take advantage of Morgan's innuendo just to show Seaver things could happen between Spencer and me. It had been immature and silly, but I just felt like I needed to do it. It was like a stupid animal instinct that forced me to mark my territory.
I shouldn't have done it. Spencer wasn't mine. Not even close. And I had to stop being jealous of Seaver. If he didn't want me, he had the right to be with anyone else. But just the thought of Spencer being with someone, anyone, made me feel sick in my stomach. I hated being in love with him. I honestly did, ‘cos I didn't want to ruin our friendship with useless feelings. Spencer wasn't in love with me. He was just my friend. My very thoughtful, cute, adorable, and lovable best friend.
I was fucked. Completely and utterly fucked. Even that second, sitting on that couch with Spencer, I couldn't focus on the movie. I pretended, but I didn't even pay attention to it. All I could think of was how warm his body felt sitting next to me, like a gigantic magnet that called for me. I could simply just move my hand and intertwined his fingers with mine. Or lean in closer, rest my head on his shoulder, feel how he wraps an arm around me, and melt in his embrace, like I had done a million times before.
But I couldn't. I had to stop that daydream of a domestic and romantic life with Spencer. It wasn't healthy. It wasn't sane. But most of all: I wasn't real. And I was never going to move forward in life if I kept thinking those movie nights meant something.
- "More popcorn?- Spencer handed me the bowl, and I shook my head- "You have been awfully quiet considering we are watching Coraline."
- "Well, we are supposed to watch the movie in silence,"- I answered and didn't take my eyes from the screen.
- "You have never done that."
- "Maybe I wanted to give it a try."
I grabbed a bunch of popcorn just to keep myself busy. I could feel Spencer's eyes on me, and it was killing me ‘cos I knew I didn't have to look at him. If I did, I wasn't sure how I would react. I was overthinking everything and anything you might think of.
- "Are you ok?"
- "Yeah. Sure."
No, I wasn't.
- "(Y/N), can you look at me?"- Spencer paused the movie and turned to me. I hesitated, thinking my best friend is an amazing profiler, and I didn't want him to know how I felt about him ‘cos it didn't want to ruin our friendship.
After a few seconds, I moved on the couch and raised an eyebrow. His brown eyes stared into mine in silence for a moment, trying to read me.
- "What is going on?"
- "Nothing,"- I lied and frowned- "Why are you so obsessed with the idea something is going on?"
- "‘Cos I have this… feeling."
- "You got a feeling?"- I chuckled, trying to be funny but failing completely. In the end, I just stared into his eyes for what seemed to be a million years but were, in fact, just a few seconds.
- "Are we ok?"
- "Of course, we are, Spencer."
- "You never call me that"- he frowned immediately, almost hurt.
- "What?"
- "You just call me Spencer when we are on a case, and there are people around us. But when we are home, I'm never Spencer to you."
"When we are home." That killed me. I hadn't realized how badly I wanted that to be our home, to have a life with Spencer.
I was in love with my best friend. I was spending every single hour of every single day of my life with him. That wasn't right! If I knew he didn't have feelings for me, why was I doing that to myself?
- "(Y/N)?"- Spencer's voice took me from my thoughts. He looked so worried I didn't know how to convince him there wasn't anything wrong, considering it felt like everything was wrong.
- "What is it?"
- "Please tell me what's wrong."
- "I told you, nothing is wrong. I just called you Spencer. That's your name. It's a lovely name. I had never met someone called Spencer ever before in my entire life. You just called me (Y/N), not pumpkin, cupcake, chipmunk, or ma chère,"- he sighed, frustrated and maybe a little annoyed.
- "Nothing is wrong, honey. I'm really ok. Just tired, maybe feeling a little invaded with Seaver in the team"- I knew he knew I hated her, so I had to blame her in a way.
- "Why?"
- "You know I'm not her fan... I hate working with her,"- I kind of chuckled at my own words because I was trying to make a joke out of my awful reality.
- "It's just for a few weeks,"- he tried to reassure me, probably to ease my mood, but the truth was I hated how it always felt like he was defending her.
- "One week, one day, it's the same torture,"- I shook my head and turned to the screen again.
- "Don't be dramatic."
- "I'm not dramatic! I just hate how she is always playing the victim ‘cos her father is a serial killer. She is clearly overcompensating! Besides, we have all gone through bad shit in our lives, and no one is using it as a tool to get things in life."
- "I don't think that's what she is doing."
- "No? Do you think she belongs at the BAU? She is a trainee agent who almost got killed in her first assignment. She works hard, and she is not stupid, I give you that. But she is not top of her class. She is not there ‘cos she is the brightest. She is there ‘cos Rossi, Hotch, and probably Prentiss felt bad for her after what happened and decided to let her hang around and learn something for a while. If you ask me, I think there are more qualified trainee agents we could use in the team, but Seaver played her "my father was a serial killer" card and got the job. And who knows how many times she had done it before, and how many times she will use it again."
Ok, that may or may not have been too hard, but it was exactly how I felt. There was a deep silence in Spencer's apartment. The movie was still paused, and after my speech, Spencer just looked at me with wide-opened eyes. I just sighed and regretted every word that had left my lips ‘cos they made me sound bitter and shallow. But at least they didn't tell him the truth: that I was jealous of the thought Seaver might get his attention. Scared that he could look at her the way he had never looked at me. Just to imagine I could bump into them kissing terrified me.
- "Maybe I should just go home,"- I whispered and tried to stand up, but Spencer grabbed my arm and pulled me back onto the couch.
- "No, please. Stay,"- his voice was a whisper but still managed to shake me.
- "I don't wanna argue with you, honey,"- I thought I would speak too loud, but no, I actually murmured, matching his tone of voice.
- "We don't have to talk about Seaver anymore. Just watch the movie with me. You love this movie."
- "You love this book,"- I added and looked at him. He smiled. God, that smile is going to be the end of me.
- "It's just so dark! But it has such a good message."
- "Not all nice people are good people?"- I just spoke about what the book had meant to me ever since I was a little girl, and Spencer analyzed the whole plot again in less than a minute.
- "I was going to say overcoming your fears, but I like your analysis the most."
- "Of course, you do, ‘cos it's better,"- I teased and stuck out my tongue to him. Spencer just stared at me and nodded.
- "You might be right. Yours is much better,"- he kept his eyes on me for a few more seconds and continued smiling until he snapped from his thoughts- "More tea, ma chère?"
- "No, honey, thank you. I'm good."
I cut him a quick smile and sat back on the couch, trying to relax. I knew it was going to be impossible, but I honestly didn't want to leave. I wanted to be with him. I had stayed home alone the whole weekend, hidden underneath a pile of blankets, in something that looked pretty much like a fort, according to Lu's words. She had stayed with me Saturday night ‘cos I told her I needed a girl's night. It was my poor attempt to stay away from Reid, and she was happy to help.
Ok, Lu didn't know I wanted to stay away from Reid. I just told her I needed a girl's night. I really didn't want to deal with all her questions. You have the right to avoid dealing with your feelings from time to time if you can. And I told Spencer Lu wasn't feeling so good, so I wanted to spend some time with her. He sounded disappointed ‘cos he was making plans for our weekend off but understood completely I needed to be with my friend.
See? Spencer made it so easy falling in love with him! He was so thoughtful it freaking hurt!
I couldn't fight the feeling anymore and rested my head on his shoulder. It felt he was waiting for me to make that move, ‘cos in a few seconds, his arm was wrapped around me protectively.
- "I know Lu needed you, but you missed a whole weekend of cuddling on this couch watching your favorite movies with me,"- Spencer whispered, bumping his head carefully against mine. I bit my lips and smiled, not taking my eyes away from the screen.
- "We do this pretty often"- that was all I could answer.
- "At least once a week for the last… thirteen-month two weeks, and… four days."
- "I love how precise you can be when it comes to our friendship, honey."
Calling it a friendship hurt me at that point, but it was what it was. Spencer chuckled and just nodded. We enjoyed our company in silence for a moment. His fingers drawing figures on my arm and my head resting on his shoulder, letting his smell invade me. It was heaven.
We were finally watching the movie… though what I really wanted was to watch a movie with Spencer instead of actually watching it. But that was the nature of our relationship. We were friends. Friends don't watch movies.
- "No way,"- I argued when his cellphone rang and interrupted our moment- "Please tell me we don't have a case."
- "We don't,"- he quickly answered and picked up the phone- "Hello? Hi… it's ok, tell me"- he didn't stand up or moved from me. He kept holding me tight against his body and finished his call by simply saying.
- "We can meet tomorrow at seven at work. I can help you with your test."- I hated those words immediately.
- "It's not a problem, see you tomorrow. Bye."
I was afraid to ask ‘cos I knew the answer. The knot on my stomach was the fair warning of what had just happened. That bitch had ruined our moment yet again.
- "What are you doing tomorrow at seven?"- I did my best to sound as casual as possible, but I knew that conversation might not end well. He hesitated. I could nearly hear his neurons struggling to find the correct answer to that question. Until he simply whispered:
- "Please don't get mad."
- "Why would I?"
- "‘Cos Ashley just called to ask me to help her study for a test…"
I took a deep breath and held it for a few seconds, doing my best to calm myself down at least a little before speaking.
- "I'm not mad, Spencer,"- I tried to lie as smoothly as possible. I even cut him a smile and looked into his hazel and confused eyes.
- "I know you don't like her, but I had offered to help in case she needed any… what?"
- "I'm not mad, really,"- I smiled again and turned to the screen- "We said we were not going to argue, and besides, she just called to ask you for help. That's not something to be mad about, right?"
Technically I wasn't mad. I was beyond furious.
- "Are you sure?"- he narrowed his eyes, baffled- "Not that I want you to be mad or something, but we just argued over her, and you said you felt invaded by her… so…"
- "Yes, but I don't wanna argue anymore. I don't want you to think I hate Seaver because I don't. And most of all, I don't want her to be the reason we fight. I don't wanna fight with you. Ever."
Spencer sighed, relieved, and smiled, pleased with my answer.
Spencer's point of view
Something felt off the following day when I walked into the bullpen and saw Ashley waiting for me by my desk with two cups of coffee. (Y/N) had said everything was ok, and I decided I wanted to believe her. But I had an awful feeling about everything that was going on.
- "Hi!"- Ashley smiled and handed me a cup- "Figured you might appreciate one of these for making you wake up earlier."
- "Thank you"- I smiled awkwardly and held the cup- "Are you ready?"
- "Yes, I brought all the notes from the class and my books…"- she set them on her desk and giggled as I went through her notes, sipping my cup- "I feel back in high school…"
- "Why?"
- "I wasn't the best student back then, and I always had to ask my classmates for help,"- I couldn't help but think of something (Y/N) had said the night before.
- "And are you a good student at the academy?"
- "Yes, I think. I'm not in the top three of my class, but I have good grades. I'm just not… a genius, like you."
Her eyes lingered on my face, and her cheeks blushed after a few seconds. I frowned, not getting why she was embarrassed. Was it just ‘cos she didn't have the same honorifics as I did?
- "I don't believe that intelligence can be accurately quantified,"- I simply answered, remembering how many times in my life I had ever said something like that. Way too many, to be honest.
It was hard to focus on the subject when Seaver kept asking me personal questions every five minutes. She seemed more interested in knowing about my childhood in Las Vegas than learning about profiling and victimology.
- "Good morning, kids!"- I turned around and smiled at Morgan, so glad to see him I might have actually felt a little relieved- "What are you doing here so early?"
- "Hey! I was just helping Ashley with her test,"- I stood up and walked from her desk over his- "And about you?"
- "I have a meeting with Strauss in a while, and Sanderson's case didn't let me sleep. It was better to come here and start working than to keep on rolling on my bed. But I'm glad you are here. Wanna help me go through a few extra files?"
- "Of course!"- I left the notes I was holding on the closest desk and walked with Morgan to the conference room.
I considered our session with Seaver finished, mostly ‘cos for the last ten minutes, she had been asking about me. What I liked doing outside the BAU, favorite bands, hobbies, anything. I answered her questions and kept trying to push her to study. I didn't want her to blame me if she failed her test.
- "Hey, kid."- Morgan whispered after a few minutes and took a look around, just to make sure no one else was near. I looked at him confused ‘cos he was never that careful to say anything in the office.
- "Is everything ok?"
- "Yes?"- I answered, though it sounded like a question ‘cos I wasn't sure what he was talking about.
- "Are you excited to have Seaver on the team for the next month?"- I shrugged and kept reading the file in my hands- "Come on, Reid. She is clearly sweet to you."
- "I don't know what you are talking about."
- "She has a crush on you, kid."
- "No, she doesn't!"
- "Come on! Are you blind?"- I stared at Morgan, not getting what he was talking about- "Man, Seaver gives you loving eyes even when we are on the field!"
- "She does not!"- I knew I was blushing. I hated those kinds of conversations, and Morgan always made me feel awkward when he hinted I should flirt with a girl or just talk to them.
- "And I would appreciate it if you didn't say anything like that ever again."
- "What's the matter, kid? You don't think she is pretty?"
- "I don't look at her that way!"- I buried my head in a file and tried not to notice how he scanned my whole face, looking for micro expressions.
- "I see. Are you afraid (Y/N) might get jealous?"- Morgan chuckled at his words and tapped on my back a few times, making me flinch- "Relax, man. I'm just kidding!"
- "I don't like those jokes, Derek. Really."
Morgan kept his eyes on me a little longer and nodded. I did my best not to show how I really felt, but somehow, I failed miserably.
- "You know, kid, it would be much easier if you just told (Y/N) how you feel about her,"- Derek's voice was soft and even more concerned than I thought he could be. I nearly shook when I heard him, so I failed my mission of remaining stoic.
- "Reid, it's ok. There's nothing wrong with having feelings for her."
- "I don't… like talking about this,"- I whispered and closed the file- "Can we just focus on work, please?"- Derek nodded and stayed quiet for a few seconds. But I knew he wasn't done yet.
- "Reid, listen. I know you are not really fond of sharing how you feel with us, I know you share almost everything that happens in your life with (Y/N), and as your friend, I've always felt glad and relieved to know you have her. But if there's something you can't tell her, and you need to talk to someone, you can count on me. You know that, right?"
I nodded and looked at him. That conversation took me back to the year I was using and had to keep it secret from my friends. I knew I could count on Morgan if anything happened, but I really wasn't comfortable sharing my thoughts, feelings, and fears with people. (Y/N) made it so easy. Was it ‘cos I loved her? I just always felt I could tell her anything. That had never happened to me before with anyone.
- "Morgan, Strauss was looking for you,"- Rossi walked into the room holding a cup of coffee and stared at us, raising an eyebrow- "Everything ok?"
- "Yes, we were just going through some files,"- Morgan stood up and grabbed the case folder- "I'll be right back."
- "I'll finish reading all these,"- I said and pointed at the box filled with more files. Morgan nodded and walked away.
- "Do you need any help?"- Seaver walked over that second and smiled at me. I stood up and shook my head.
- "Thanks, but I'm basically done. I'll just go make myself another cup of coffee."
- "I'll go with you!"- she smiled and waited for me by the door. Rossi looked at me and raised an eyebrow. I just cut him a straight smile and walked to the kitchenette, followed closely by Ashley.
(Y/N) walked into the bullpen that minute. I watched her as she opened the glass door and took out her jacket. It felt like the time passed in slow motion as she walked. I couldn't help it, I just smiled as soon as our eyes crushed, and for a few seconds, life was perfect. Just to know she was there, smiling at me made everything worth living.
See why I couldn't tell anyone how I was feeling? They would make fun of me. Morgan would never understand the agony and the dimension of my love for her. He would just tease me. I wonder if he had ever actually been in love 'till that point in life.
I didn't want anyone to know what was happening to me ‘cos I was sure they would make fun of me, and that was the last thing I needed at that moment. So I did what I knew best: I locked it all inside and waited for it to burn me alive.
- "Good morning, chipmunk!"- I stood by (Y/N)'s side and smiled as she left her things on her desk and turned to me. She just looked into my eyes, and my brain turned into mush.
- "Good morning, honey bunny. Did you sleep well? You look tired."
- "Yeah, I just got up extra early today to help Seaver, and now I was helping Derek with some files."
- "Do you need a hand?"
- "Sure!"- I didn't even analyze my answer. I just spit the words, thinking it would be amazing to spend some time with my friend, working together.
- "Hi (Y/N), how are you?"- that until her face changed completely when Seaver waved at her- "Spencer, do you want me to make your coffee?"- I froze and turned to her in silence.
- "No, thank you. I'll… just… wait a little before having another one. I just had my third cup."
- "Three cups in already"- (Y/N) narrowed her eyes and turned to her desk, giving me her back- "How long have you been awake?"
- "Not as long as Morgan, I tell you that,"- I pointed at him, walking out of Strauss's office and heading back to our conference room.
- "Let's help him, then."
(Y/N) walked quickly, and I followed closely. I wished I hadn't said no to that coffee. I really needed one to go through that morning.
During that morning, Derek questioned Sanderson again and finally took him and Rossi back to his house, trying to trigger any memory that might help us crack the case. Meanwhile, the rest of the team and I stayed back in the office, repeatedly going through the case files. So far, all we knew is that a team had attacked Sanderon's home and framed him for the murder of his wife and daughter.
The whole day, I focused on work ‘cos it's my favorite escape, and clearly, there was something more important to think of than whatever was going on with my life. But my head was killing me. The migraines were starting to get more intense, and I think they got worse the more thinking I gave to my relationship with (Y/N).
- "It sounds like we need to profile a dormant killer"- Ashle's voice surprised me when I was pouring myself a cup of fresh coffee in the kitchenette.
- "A very lucky one. He was essentially given a gift, a patsy in the form of Don Sanderson, and he'll do anything to protect that story."- I answered, thinking I didn't want to be in Sanderon's shoes, trying to clear my name of something I hadn't done.
- "When someone has a secret this big, everything becomes a lie."
Somehow, Seaver's words hit me. I'm sure she didn't mean to strike a nerve, but she did. I had been in love with my best friend for too long, and now it was starting to affect my life. I didn't want it to get in the way of work, and we were at work most of our time together. But there was nothing I could do about it. I just had to keep on faking everything was normal.
- "He'll most likely be pathological,"- I nearly choked at my own words as I tried to shake away the thoughts from my head.
- "So, we're looking for a liar in D. C. I thought we were trying to narrow this down."- Ashley tried to joke and waited for my reaction but didn't get anything. Instead, I just cut her a straight smile and walked away.
By the end of the night, Morgan had gotten the unsub. But I was still a mess. It had been the longest day in weeks, not just ‘cos I had barely slept the night before, but because I was overthinking everything that happened around me. It was exhausting.
- "Are you coming, Batsy?"- (Y/N) asked me and grabbed her bag after putting on her coat. I stood from my desk and nodded.
- "Yes, ma chère."
- "Where are you guys going tonight?"- Derek asked and smiled at us- "No. Don't tell me, planning this year's matching Comic-Con costumes"- I chuckled and probably blushed, busted.
- "We already settled those, Derek. We are way ahead of schedule this year,"- (Y/N) answered and stuck out her tongue to him.
- "(Y/N), can you give me a second before you go?"- Prentiss stood up and smiled at my friend, who just nodded and walked with her to the conference room. Derek and Seaver looked at me.
- "What?"
- "Do you know what's that about?"- Morgan questioned me.
- "I have no idea."
(Y/N)'s point of view
- "Please don't freak out,"- Emily smiled and turned to me after she closed the door behind her back- I just needed to clear the air a little bit between us.
- "What? Why? Is there something wrong?"
- "I don't know, I just feel you have been acting weird lately, and I needed to know if it has something to do with me supervising Seaver."
I nearly gasped. Not ‘cos I felt insulted but ‘cos I felt caught. I knew I hadn't been subtle about my feelings for Seaver. I just didn't want them to get in the middle of work.
- "I haven't been weird with you, Emily, and I don't think I've been acting strange."
- "Come on, you don't like Ashley, and I offered to supervise her while she works with us."
- "Yes, but neither of those has anything to do with me and you. We are friends, Emily."
- "I know, and I wanna honor that friendship, (Y/N). I love working with you. I just want you to know I'm not… I just… I'm trying to help Seaver start her career."
- "I understand that. We are ok,"- I tried to reassure her, but I knew she could read between my bullshit.
- "Do you think you could try to be a little bit nicer with her?"
- "Nicer?"
- "Yes, (Y/N). She is making an effort to get along with the team, and you've been giving her the cold shoulder since day one." -I crossed my arms on my chest, obviously annoyed and defensive.
- "I have been friendly with her, Emily. I just don't like her, and you can't force me to be her friend."
In my defense, in my mind, that argument didn't sound as childish as it did when I said it out loud.
- "Don't be selfish! Just because you are jealous, you can't deprive her of the opportunity of a lifetime with this team."
Emily's words were knives against my ego and nearly destroyed my facade. I stared into her eyes and wondered how to get out of that situation without hurting my friend. I could pretend I didn't know what she was talking about, but we both knew that was bullshit. I could actually try to tell her how I felt, but it was so humiliating I refused to open up. So instead, I just nodded and smiled at her.
- "I'm sorry that's how you see me. I'll try to be a better version of myself tomorrow,"- and needless to say, I turned around and left.
- "(Y/N), please wait,"- but I didn't stop walking. I refused to continue talking about Seaver with anyone. I refused to deal with feelings or the real world.
- "Everything ok?"- Spencer asked me the second he saw me appear by his side.
- "Yes,"
- "You are blushing. Did you and Prentiss argue?"
- "No, honey. We didn't argue. She just wanted to check on me ‘cos she was worried I was mad at her. But that's all."- Spencer just nodded and looked at me in silence.- "Why don't we just go home and forget about today, honey?"
Easier said than done.
So Seaver was getting under my skin. And it was getting harder to control. That week was hell, and I didn't want to show it. Eventually, I talked with Emily again, and I tried to explain to her I wasn't being mean with Seaver. I just didn't like her. And though I gave Emily my word to be friendlier with Ashley, the circumstances weren't really helping.
Things didn't get any better than Friday night. No, if anything, that was the night that made it all worse. Prentiss, JJ, and I got together at Garcia's house and had a few drinks before leaving for Anderson's birthday. I was making my biggest effort to have fun and ease my mind. Spencer said he wasn't sure he'd make it ‘cos he was tired, and automatically I almost turned out the whole deal, but Penelope literally dragged me to her house and put a beer in my hand.
- "You, my young lady, are going to put some makeup on, a hot dress, and we are going to party!"
- "But PG, I'm not…"- but she didn't let me out of it. Instead, she shushed me and raised an eyebrow, looking pretty convincing.
- "No "but." You are going. End of the conversation."
So she dragged me to the bar, along with Prentiss and JJ, who had left Will with little Henry to join us for what was promised to be one epic girl's night.
Anderson was so happy to see us. He was a sweetheart who was always willing to help us. I knew technically he didn't work at the BAU, but he was always there whenever we needed him. We all felt he was part of the team.
- "Sonny!!"- I yelled and hugged him tight
- "I'm so glad you girls made it!!"- and his smile was priceless- "JJ!!"- he actually yelled when he saw her and ran to give her a triple bear hug.
- "Grant Anderson!! I can't believe it's really you!!"
- "I've missed you so much!! How's Henry?"
- "So big!! I feel I haven't been out with friends in so long!"- JJ looked around, and her face kept lighting up as she recognized more friends and acquaintances from Quantico. I looked around and recognized Morgan already flirting with a woman at the other side of the bar.
- "Looks like chocolate thunder knows how to keep himself busy,"- I joked, and Garcia turned immediately.
- "Have you ever seen him shirtless?"- she asked in a lower voice and leaned a little closer to me, just to make sure no one would listen- "I'm sure it's illegal looking so good in real life."
I laughed and turned to see Prentiss walk to the bar to get us the first round of drinks. Ok, I'll admit it, I was having a great time. I know I didn't want to go at first, but spending time with my work friends and not just with Spencer was refreshing. Not that I didn't do fun things with the rest of the team, but my relationship with Spencer, I mean the friendship that pretty much looked like a relationship, consumed most of my time. But I just loved being with Reid more than anything.
But one night without him wasn't going to be the end of the world. Right?
Right.
Anderson and I danced and laughed. It was all very innocent. And though I've never considered myself a hot chick or whatever, a few guys asked if they could get me drinks, and I kindly declined. I wasn't looking for a one-night stand or anything. I just wanted to have fun with my friends.
- "And where's Reid?"- Anderson asked as we reached our table, where Prentiss and JJ were catching up and laughing.
- "Home, he said he was tired."
- "And? When are you two going to come clean about your relationship? You know, having the confirmation of your romance would be the best birthday present you could ever give me."
- "Grant Anderson, you nosy bastard!!"- I hit his arm and heard his laughter- "You know we are not dating!"
- "Come on!! I mean it! You have to get together! You are like the FBI sweethearts!!"
- "Shut your face!"- Anderson laughed even harder and took a look around the bar
- "So, if you are not dating Spencer, I have a friend who asked about you."
- "Who? What friend? Is he here?"- Garcia shouted question after question as she had overheard the whole conversation and even moved closer.
- "His name is James. He saw you on the news a few months ago, at a press conference with Rossi, and has been asking about you ever since."
I frowned and looked at Garcia, who was wide-eyed staring at Anderson. I had no idea what was going on. It was bizarre.
- "No, thank you?"- I whispered, not even sure of what I should answer at that- "I'm very flattered, Grant, but… I'm really not looking for someone right now."
- "You are not?"- Garcia asked me, and I just shook my head.
- "No, I have too much going on in my life, with work and… well… what we do…"
- "Really?"- Anderson sounded a little disappointed- "Well, in case you change your mind, James is…"
- "(Y/N)? Can I talk to you for a second?"- Garcia grabbed my arm and crawled me to a side of the bar.
- "What? What is it?"
- "Munchkin, you know I love you."
- "Yes, I love you too, PG."
- "That's why I feel like I need to be honest with you, ‘cos you've always been so sweet, and we've known each other for years now, and I feel like if I don't tell you this, you are never going to forgive me."- Penelope was nearly hyperventilating as she spoke.
- "Ok, what is it? You are scaring me."
- "You have to tell Reid how you feel."
- "What?"
- "He has to know! You have to tell him!"
- "I don't wanna talk about what, Penelope"- I tried to walk away from her, but she stopped me, grabbed my arm, and pulled me back.
- "No, (Y/N). He loves you, I'm not a profiler, I don't even play one on tv, but I am sure what I see in his eyes when he looks at you is love… ‘cos it's the same you have when you look at him!"
- "Son of a bitch!!"- the words escaped my lips as my heart nearly left my chest.
- "No, (Y/N)!"- but Garcia lost my attention that second, ‘cos all I could see was Spencer Walter Reid walking into the bar and Ashley Seaver hanging from his arm.
- "What do you want me to tell him, Garcia? To have fun with his new girlfriend?"- I pointed at the door, and her jaw nearly hit the floor.
- "Ok, no. There has to be a reasonable explanation for that!"
- "Yes, but Spencer being in love with me is not the explanation. I'm gonna get a drink."
Spencer's point of view
I was surprised to get Ashley's phone call that night. When my phone rang, I was ready to go to bed. My head was killing me. I had already scheduled an appointment with the doctor for some exams. I was starting to have a bad feeling about what those headaches really were, and I was too scared to tell anyone what was going on. Not even (Y/N).
Actually, of all people, she was the one I wanted to keep in the dark. Why? ‘Cos ever since we met she had taken care of me, I didn't think it was fair. She had taken me into her life and given me a place in it. And sometimes, I felt I was a burden. She helped me overcome all of my traumas and even my drug addiction. She introduced me to her best friends and made me part of her life. (Y/N) had taken trips with me to Las Vegas just to see my mom, ‘cos she knew it was hard for me to do it on my own. If it hadn't been for her, I would have probably spent over a year without visiting her. Now, we took a weekend to see mom every few months.
Why would I trouble her with some headaches? It wasn't fair.
When Ashley called, for a moment, I thought it might be (Y/N), asking me to pick her up. But no. It wasn't her that time.
- "Hey Spence, I'm sorry to bother you, but… are you at Anderson's party?"
- "No, actually, I'm in my house."
- "Why? I thought you were invited too."
- "Yeah, I know, and I was, but I'm kind of tired, and I wanted to come home and get some rest. Why? Are you at the party?"
- "No, but I was getting ready to go. But now I feel kind of awkward asking you."
- "What? What is it?"
- "I just… wanted to know if you could come with me. I'm so sorry, Spence, I didn't know you were tired. I just… I wanted to go to the party, but I feel kind of silly going alone. I wanted to ask Prentiss, but she left with (Y/N) and Garcia, and I felt so awkward asking…"
I wanted to groan, roll in my bed and hide under my pillow. But Ashley was the new girl, and she deserved to have some fun.
- "Don't worry, I'll take you there,"- I know I whispered my answer ‘cos I didn't really want to do it, but somehow I felt it was my duty.
- "Really?!"- and by the excitement in Ashley's voice, it was clear that was what she wanted to hear.
- "I'll pick you up in half an hour, ok?"
- "Thank you so much, Spence!!"
But when I walked into the bar, I knew I had made a mistake. I felt it in my guts. The same intuition I never followed in my personal life, only on the field.
I quickly looked around as Ashley held on to my arm tightly and walked into the bar with a big smile. I soon found Prentiss and JJ talking at a table filled with empty glasses, and my heart jumped inside my chest at the warm, familiar feeling that my friends gave me. I missed JJ very much. And not just as a team member but as a friend who had been taken away from us. (Y/N) always said I didn't know how to deal with change, neither did she, and the shifts in the team always affected me.
Soon I saw Morgan too, talking with Anderson and some other agents. Garcia had to be close then, but I couldn't see her or (Y/N) anywhere around.
- "Come on! Let's get a drink!"- Ashley said and crawled me to the bar.
- "I don't drink and drive"- I said, and she pouted.
- "Come on! You are no fun! Just one!"
- "No, just water. Thanks,"- I turned and scanned the place. Everybody was there, and they seemed to be having fun. Penelope waved and walked to me suddenly. She cut me a short smile and grabbed my arm.
- "Hey, what the hell are you doing here?"
- "I didn't want to come, but Ashley insisted and…"
- "Hi!"- Ashley appeared by our side and handed me a bottle of water- "I'm so excited to be here! We really needed to decompress after everything that happened this week, right Garcia?"
Penelope stared at us, trying to formulate an answer. I could see her making her bet to say something, but she just didn't. Instead, she just turned around and walked away.
- "Is she ok?"- I didn't know how to answer that, ‘cos Penelope's reaction surprised me. Ashley just looked around and grabbed my arm again.
- "Come on, Spencer! Let's dance!"
- "No, I don't… dance, sorry."
Lucky for me, Prentiss showed up and invited us to sit with her at her table. I don't know if she noticed I was uncomfortable, but I was glad to see her. Being in that bar made me feel pretty awkward and exposed.
I had never been much of a party person. I wasn't used to bars and gatherings until I joined the BAU. When I first met Derek, he tried to take me out a few times and be my wingman. It's obvious he failed at that mission. Meeting people at a bar is the most complicated equation I could ever try to solve. It doesn't work for me, no matter how hard Derek pushed me to do it. He said I had to rely on what made me feel comfortable. But no. It wasn't that I couldn't meet people. It was that I didn't want to meet anyone once I met the woman of my dreams. Even when I knew she could never be mine.
When (Y/N) came along, she started hosting these fun "dinner parties" with Frank, Lu, and Mikey, which changed everything. It was the first time I was hanging out with people my age doing things I actually liked doing. It wasn't about drinking or picking girls in a bar. It was about playing Jenga, or charades, eating pizza, and talking about movies and sometimes even books.
(Y/N) said her friends considered me part of the gang, which was all I ever wanted to hear. That I belonged. It's kind of sad when you think about it, but I don't care. I had never felt like I belonged anywhere, and they made me feel like I was one of them. They took me to their rock shows, and I jumped along with the crowd, knowing I wasn't an outcast there. I was with my friends.
You don't know how good that made me feel. And for years, they were my social comfort and cocoon. Then, when Rossi joined the BAU again, he started hosting fancy dinner parties at his house, and I got to hang out with the whole team without being at a bar, pushed to meet people. And it was so good. (Y/N) always said Rossi's arrival had a cohesive effect on us. Not because he brought us together, but the circumstances of his arrival and everything that happened that first year.
This team is no stranger to trauma, and that's a fact. I think Rossi's dinner parties gave us a space to be ourselves, relax, have a few drinks and enjoy our time together. I think that's when we stepped from being friends to be family.
And I hadn't had one before.
I hugged JJ tight as soon as I saw her smiling at me. I hadn't seen her ever since her goodbye party, over two months before, but we had talked on the phone a few times.
- "I've missed you so much, Spence!!"- she said and held my face with both hands- "You and (Y/N) owe me two babysit nights,"- and I laughed, thinking we promised we'd take care of Henry so she and Will could have a date, but we were called for a case.
- "Wait! It was one night!"- I argued, chuckling- "Why is it two nights now?"
- "‘Cos I lost a very exclusive reservation due to the two of you."
- "Technically, it wasn't our fault, we were called in for a case..."
I smiled and sat next to JJ, and Prentiss sat next to me. Ashley stood by the table and smiled at JJ. Right, they didn't even know each other.
- "It's very nice to meet you, Agent Jareau. The team talks very highly of you,"- she shook JJ's hand and smiled.
- "Ashley, right? Prentiss was just telling me you will be taking your remedial training at the BAU. Congratulations, it's a fantastic team to work with."
- "Thank you,"- I took a look around, still trying to find my best friend around. But it seemed useless, and I was starting to feel worried.
- "Where's (Y/N)?"- I had to ask.
- "She was with Anderson a minute ago,"- Penelope said and looked around- "I am going to look for her and bring her here in a second. I'll be right back."
And so, she was gone.
Prentiss and I pretty much interrogated JJ about her new job and the new team she worked with at the pentagon. I sipped my water and half-listened her answer, ‘cos most of my head was trying to register what was going on around me. No, actually, I was trying to find (Y/N). Penelope had been gone for half an hour looking for her, and I was starting to think something weird was going on. Besides, my head was killing me, and all I wanted was to go home. But I hadn't seen JJ in weeks, and I couldn't waste a chance like that.
Ashley talked with Prentiss too, and every once in a while, she tried to engage in conversation with me. But to be honest, I couldn't really concentrate on anything. I just wanted to know (Y/N) was alright.
- "Excuse me,"- I stood up slowly and looked at my friends- "I'm going to the bathroom, be right back."
- "Can you get us another round on our way back?"- Prentiss asked and smiled guiltily.
- "Sure."
- "Do you need help?"- Ashley tried to stand up, but Emily stopped her.
- "He got it, don't worry."
So I was left on my own. I walked around the bar. In my mind, I kept telling myself I was "looking for the bathroom," but I knew very well I was indeed trying to find (Y/N). I had been in that bar for an hour, and I still hadn't seen her. I was worried.
I walked around the bar and found Anderson. He seemed to be a little shocked to see me there but smiled and hugged me. It was weird hugging people, still. But Anderson was part of the team. It always felt like it. We had known each other for years, and somehow it was like he was in the background of our daily basics.
- "Have you seen (Y/N)?"- I asked him, and he widened his eyes- "What?"
- "Yeah, she's right there, actually… "- Grant Anderson pointed and turned around- "Later, Reid."
- "Bye"- I didn't even look at him. I just turned and looked around to see (Y/N).
But my best friend didn't notice me. She was too busy kissing some guy.
I stood in front of her, not knowing what to do. Her eyes were closed, and her arms were around his neck, so clearly, she wasn't in distress, and no matter how badly I wanted to take her from him, I just couldn't.
For a minute, I couldn't believe my eyes. I just stood there and stared at (Y/N), trying to understand what was going on. I always knew she wasn't meant to be mine, but I had never gotten such a brutal reminder. Not even when she was dating Paul. Watching her kissing someone else was shocking. The way that man put his hands on her waist and held her close to him, just like I always dreamt of doing, was painful.
Painful. That was the only word I can explain how it felt.
I stood there for a minute or so. I really don't know how long it was, but it felt long enough to burn in my memory everything I needed to torture myself with for the rest of my life. I stepped back after a minute. It might have been longer; I really can't recall. And all I managed to do was to walk out of the bar and reach my car.
I opened the door and slammed it as I sat behind the wheel. I wanted to cry and yell. But I didn't do either of those. Instead, I stayed still, staring at the nothing in front of me, trying to erase that fresh memory from my head. But it was impossible. (Y/N) was making out with some guy inside that bar, and there was nothing I could do to stop her. So I did the only thing I could do at that minute. I started the car and got the fuck out of there.
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Next update: June 23th, 2021
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datawyrms · 3 years
Text
Half a Decade Late
Valerie was finally promoted to the main headquarters of the Guys in White. There she finally comes face to face with Phantom, who disappeared five years ago, locked in a cell. For Phic Phight 2021, @lexosaurus' prompt!
Nothing proved ’harder workers get ahead’ was only a capitalist lie than the absolute hassle getting promotions within the GIW. Of course she’d gone right to them for employment, it was the only organization large enough to actually pay people that took her resume of ghost hunting seriously. She had experience, actual knowledge and even her own gear but had still spent years getting jerked around to various small operations, basically just using her to train all their useless recruits while still just considering her a ‘fellow’ field agent. It wasn’t like she had the option to quit in protest, no one else was in the market for ghost hunters. As far as most people knew ‘ghost intelligence’ was just a joke cover story that the agents were very attached to. They didn’t want any more Amity Parks, so if she wanted to live somewhere new and still do her job...these guys were it. She’d been very clear, she wanted to be in the main office, where everything happened. That didn’t stop them from constantly assigning her literally anywhere but the actual headquarters. Maybe they finally ran out of other places, she still half expected to get stopped at the door and be told about a new field mission they absolutely needed her on immediately. It didn’t happen. Valerie Grey finally got to clock in as an Ecto Containment Officer at the main branch. Where they kept the strongest creatures, developed the new anti-ghost equipment and did more than just splattering a ghost down to nothing. Sure, she liked a good ghost obliterating, but it got boring after a while. There were only so many ways a ghost could beg for it’s useless afterlife before it became white noise. It didn’t stop any new ones from showing up, or tell her anything new. Just got rid of one pest, permanently. That wouldn’t help explain some ghosts, the powerful ones that showed up again and again. It wouldn’t explain the one that stopped showing up either. There was no way that life ruining ghost just got ‘bored’ and vanished without notice. It was still out there, plotting something. She just knew it in her bones. She had to be ready for it. There were traces of that ghost, hints of his ectosignature that she came across in the field, he was still out there. The GIW was just a means to an end, she didn’t trust them to be ready alone.
Sterile corridors and simplistic signs were expected, but even the break area was doing its best impression of a frozen tundra. Fantastic for morale? Probably not. Made the coffee pot easy to spot, at least. Even if she preferred to avoid the stuff in uniform. It stained too easily, and just made her wish for her red battle suit. She took a cup to at least have an excuse for her scoping out the place, she could pass it off to someone once she got to the containment area. A quick double check that everything was in place at the mirror before heading right back out to the winding halls. She wasn’t going to be late, she didn’t have time for that. Maybe a red tie was against protocol, but no one had been stupid enough to bother her about it yet. Judging from the deferential nods from her latest coworkers, that wouldn’t be changing. No one who worked here couldn’t know who she was. The only Ghost Hunter who got out of Amity Park without getting corrupted by the ectoplasmic monsters. It was a shame, Jack and Maddie Fenton used to be a serious force for humanity. Five years ago they suddenly flipped the script, denouncing their work and calling for peace with unreasonable fiends. Their daughter Jazz likely had something to do with it, but Valerie had her own theories. Danny, her friend and once boyfriend had gone missing around that time. Leverage to ensure the Fenton’s ‘good behaviour?’ The whole thing reeked of ghosts. To think she might have gone the same way. Back then she was actually listening to the pest, starting to really consider them a ‘good’ ghost. Like that was actually possible, when he’d just been playing to emotion and her own desire to give up in fighting a dangerous foe over and over. So much for that. That monster showed it’s true colours, sure enough. Something the GIW never bothered to look into, even as she wrote report after report about the incident, how unlikely it was for the Fentons of all people to change that drastically without constant possession. Not worth the resources, even when it was easy to see what tech was built on the foundations the couple had laid. They were throwing away so much to focus on little outbreaks of ghosts instead of making more of a lasting change. Stupid. That was what the funding was ‘meant’ to go towards, as if helping the Fentons would be less productive than making a slightly different ectogun.
She almost hoped there would be a problem, just to prove this is where she should have always been.Even if it seemed distinctly unlikely. She had to swipe to get into the lab, then yet again to actually get to the cells. Or the ‘vault’, as if the higher ups wanted to pretend the creatures in there were inert materials instead of cunning and dangerous beings. Even though they had someone posted at each door, and someone on guard inside as well, herself today. To get acquainted with the place mostly, she had more than enough training on ‘proper handling’ procedures.
“Hey, you can swap with me today, if you want.”
Valerie blinked, eyebrow already raised at the posted guard’s suggestion. “I can handle watching caged ghosts.”
They had the sense to look embarrassed, taking their hand away from the oversized ectogun to loosen their tie- which was tied rather poorly now that she got a better look at it. “I’m sure you can, it’s just, well.” They wouldn’t stop fidgeting with their tie now, eyes checking that no one was really paying attention to the guards. “H0G02 is awake today. No one likes those days.”
“Then all the more reason to get used to it early.” She didn’t give them time to sputter another excuse, swiping her card and striding past without another look. As if people should be worried about a captive ghost being awake. Maybe some of the people here never got a spine before joining up.
It wasn’t as cold as she expected it to be. Or as dark. It was actually brighter, thanks to the extra row of fluorescent lights. On some level she expected the room to reflect the monsters kept here, a shadowy icebox of a space. Of course it wasn’t. These were defeated creatures under human control, of course their cages would be bright and clean, the air warmed for human comfort. The ghosts might not like it, but why care what they wanted? It wasn’t like there were many to begin with, mostly green oversized vermin with blank red eyes. Most had the sense to cower back as she walked past, but a fair few didn’t even twitch. Calling a ghost of all things lifeless was foolish, but it was the only word coming to mind...she had to focus. She didn’t pity these things. Why so many creatures though? The real dangerous ones, the most monstrous ones were the ones that could play human, the ones that had conniving minds that only worked to cause destruction and terror. These were just feral things, annoying but hardly more impressive than a coyote when you knew what to do. Half of them she’d barely rate above ‘feral cat’. A light near the back flickered. Strange. When it flickered a second time she was already releasing her helmet to pull it on. Not nearly as easy as just willing it on, but at least she could carry it in a pocket without needing to rely on some ghost’s power. Three steps and her gun was ready, not that she expected to need it. Really, she worked on autopilot, legs still moving as she stared at the largest glass cage at the back of the room. Or more accurately, at what was in it.
“Oh, newbie. ‘Sup.” The ghost rasped out, blank green eyes watching the ghost hunter. A teenaged boy with a shock of white hair, a black jumpsuit, but the voice of a seventy year old chain smoker. Just sitting in a painfully bright cell, watching. Not exactly as she remembered him, but close enough.
“You.” The disgust was easy to voice, even as her brain struggled to catch up. He was here? Looking practically exactly as he had when she was still a soft hearted freelancer?
He only gave a sputtering laugh at the aggression. “Me? You’re not that mad about the light, are you? I’m bored, Tie.”
“What are you doing here?” That wasn’t the important question really, she should be more concerned that he apparently was able to manipulate light fixtures from his cell...but she’d been hunting after this ghost for five years. Protocol could go shove itself up the director’s ass.
“Same thing I do every day Tie, being some government property!” His laugh was wrong, not from amusement like she remembered. A desperate cackle that didn’t fool anyone. “You new enough to still have your soul in there?”
“Answer the question, Phantom.”
The smirk slid off the ghost’s face. “Wh’ad you call me? Like I’m only calling you Tie cus the red sticks out, I can call you Shooty if you don’t like it, newbie.”
The response made her insides run cold. It had to be Phantom, and the terrible sense of humour was just like him- but the ghost wasn’t quite right. What was this? It couldn’t be some copy of the ghost kid, could it? “I called you by your name, ghost.”
“Never heard of em.” The ghost crossed his legs and looked away, apparently bored of the person holding a weapon. “What day is it?”
Surely he was playing around. “What do you think your name is, then?”
He didn’t take his attention off the ceiling, looking more bored than anything.“Day first, Tie. Gotta know how much of a head start I’ve got.”
“Like you’re in any position to bargain.”
“Hm? Whatcha gonna do Tie? Let me be unconscious for a few hours? Scary. Day first.”
There was the Phantom she knew, snide and sarcastic when he really had no business being so. “I could do worse than that.”
“Doubt it. You gun grunts gotta listen to the freaks out there, remember?” His shoulders shook with a silent laughter, but it looked more like spasms. “No more mishandling the goods, yeah? Day Tie, comeonnnnnn”
Since when was he so interested in the calendar? Not to mention how weird it was how he kept referring to himself...and pretending he didn’t know his name. “It’s Monday.”
That got his attention, the casual rocking halting as he looked at her again, disturbingly still. “Monday, really?”
“Lying is your thing, not mine.”
He grinned. “I like you Tie, so you’ll probably be fired in like a week. Maybe it’s the red.” The tension left the ghost completely, she hadn’t even noticed how stiffly he’d been sitting until his spine relaxed as his elbows rested on his legs. “Pretty sure I’m H0G02. Least that’s what all your creeps call me.”
There was no way Phantom of all ghosts would call himself ‘H0G02’. He had to be a mimic of some sort, a ghost that modelled himself on the once well known Amity Park menace. “You like me because I told you it was Monday? Seriously?”
“I like the Mondays more than you, if that helps.”
“Not particularly.”
“Sounds like a you problem.” He was watching her again, more curious than anything. She shouldn’t be glad to see a spark of something in those eyes, but he was far less creepy this way.
“What’s so great about Monday? You’re a ghost.” She didn’t really care. She should be asking important questions. She was just...playing along to see if it really was Phantom. That didn’t stop her for being grateful for the helmet.
“Monday is the farthest day away from Friday.”
“Wouldn’t that be Saturday?”
“It hasn’t been Saturday or Sunday for...like four years? Those days don’t exist, I think you humans made ‘em up to prank me.” Phantom shrugged, sounding completely serious. Not even a hint of amusement or a grin. “Pretty good one, all you new guys keep it up.”
He was going to be completely useless if he kept saying nonsense. How could he be useful in finding out what happened to the Fenton’s son if he couldn’t even talk about the days of the week sensibly? “Fine, what’s so bad about Friday then.”
“Ohhhhh, you’re really new, Tie.” the ghost flopped onto his side, bored of sitting up apparently. “You know, the day they keep me around for? That day.” He wasn’t quite still, his right shoulder moving very, very carefully. Hiding something.
She didn’t have the patience for this.“What are you hiding there.”
“Tie has good eyes. Gotta remember that.” Phantom muttered, getting onto his back, a blue shard of ice melting off his arm.
“You don’t really think that some ice would help you out of there?”
“Out?” He looked mystified by the suggestion, but that could more be seeing his face upside down. “That glass doesn’t break for anything, I should know.”
Which didn’t explain why he’d been trying to hide the fact he’d made ice at all. He knew it too, but apparently playing stupid was still one of his favourite tactics. “Knock it off and just answer me.”
Phantom’s frown didn’t change, green eyes staring intently at her helmet as if hoping to see through it. “I could show you why?”
It didn’t sound like a threat. “Sure, why not. It’s gonna be a long day.” If it was? Then she’d show him that she wasn’t someone he could mess with.
Ice wrapped itself around the ghost’s lower arm alarmingly quick, a wickedly sharp blade of ice with serrated teeth jutting from the scrawny arm at an awkward angle. It was practised, something this ghost must have done often in all the time he’d been gone from her life. Yet it was so different from how Phantom usually chose to fight. That was a weapon to tear and maim, not to shock, stun or bruise. It looked wrong on him. The idea that this ghost wasn’t Phantom at all only grew more credible with that thing on his arm, even if ice powers were to be expected. His eyes flicked back to green, still fixated on her as he lifted the arm and stabbed down hard. Right into his other arm. Didn’t even blink.
“What are you doing!” She couldn’t remember the last time Phantom had ever been frightening on some primal level. This- with the disturbing snap of bone as the edges of the blade caught and tore made her hair stand on end. “Stop that, Phantom. What’s wrong with you!?”
“Cancelling Friday.” Phantom was laughing as the blade melted away into the pool of green rapidly spreading from his self inflicted wound. “I said you’d probably get fired Tie.”
“Forget Friday you idiot, cover the wound so you stop splattering everywhere!” He was just a ghost-a ghost messing with her. A ghost she’d fought with and had heard scream in pain. This...thing wasn’t him. Her heart didn’t care what her mind thought, insisting he needed help.
The ghost sat up, his left arm holding on by a shred of his suit before splattering into the puddle, but the left behind stump stopped dripping almost as quickly as he’d lost the limb. “Aw. Maybe Tie does have some soul left. You actually sound worried.”
“Of course I am! You slashed your arm off!”
“So?”
He didn’t seem to be in pain. If it wasn’t for the mess of green and the lack of a limb, she’d almost say she imagined it. Why did she care? “You wouldn’t do this sort of thing.”
“Uh. Yes I would? You just saw me do it. I’m down for an encore.”
The idea just made her feel ill. “Don’t.” Did she want this to be Phantom or not? “What the hell is wrong with you?”
“Well I’m down an arm. So the coats are going to be very whiny about how much ectoplasm they can get out of me.”
“You must have felt that.”
“Sure. Isn’t nearly as bad as when they start ripping as much ectoplasm as they can out of you. Every single Friday.” He actually rolled his eyes, like she should just know this.
Why did they bother keeping Phantom around if they just wanted ectoplasm? He might be strong, but no ghost had limitless amounts. They’d just fall apart and stop existing. That’s why the weakest ones never even left the Ghost Zone, they couldn’t survive without constantly being around the stuff! “What makes you so special then? Not your attitude.”
“I’m just lucky enough to make my own ectoplasm. Who knew food was easier to get then high grade ectoplasm? Not me.” His remaining arm pointed to her weapon, his smile stretching. “Bet ya your weapon’s fully powered from Fridays. Yours and every other thing they use in this hellhole.”
“Ghosts can’t do that.” The lie was absurd. It went against everything they knew about ghosts, even before food entered the equation.
“Y’know, Tie. I think I knew a ghost hunter that wore red once.” the ghost’s eyes went unfocused, unmoving as he looked listlessly into space. “It’s a good colour.”
“You knew me. Quit fooling around with this not remembering crap.” Valerie threw her helmet aside, no longer caring. She had to know who this ghost really was. She had to know if everything he was blathering about was a lie. So what if it wasn’t ‘safe’.
His eyes didn’t change. “Y’know how hard it is to remake a brain? Cut me some slack Tie…”
“I mean it. Look at me Phantom. If you’re the ghost I know, you can stop pretending to be something else.”
“You lose the details. Arms and legs are easy. The brain though? Way too hard.” He kept rambling to himself, not reacting even as she put a hand to the glass to get his attention. “Y’know how many times they’ve cut it open? I don’t. I lose track after like. Eleven. Maybe. Pointy Shoe said my best was fifteen but I sure don’t remember that.”
She wanted him to just stop talking. She wanted this ghost to be some strange creature she didn’t know. To not have the only possible link to someone long lost a shattered husk. “Phantom. Do you remember the hunter in red’s name?”
He finally blinked. “I’m not this Phantom guy, Tie.”
“Okay, whatever, forget that part. The ghost hunter in red, what do you remember?” She insisted, knocking again in hopes it would keep the ghost’s focus.
“Wish I’d told em something.” he held up his gloved hand as she opened her mouth to speak. “Don’t remember what that something was, don’t ask.”
So he was Phantom? He couldn’t be. That was so non-specific it could be anything. “You never explained how you’re the only ghost that can make their own ectoplasm.”
“It’s in my name Tie! Come on. Thought you guys were smart or whatever.” He did a very awkward one armed attempt at crossing it, eyebrow raised. “The H? The feeding a ghost food thing?”
She didn’t really get the whole naming scheme they used here. The fact it mattered wasn’t making her gut unclench either. “What about the H?
“Hybrid? Might have been Human. That might have been a joke.”
Valarie’s mouth was drier than any desert when he said it that easily, that casualty while kicking his own arm aside. “You’re saying you aren’t all ghost.”
“Yup. Not yet! Trust me, I’ve tried,” the bubbly high pitched laugher clawed out of the ghost at that. “I tried so much. Guess it’s another thing I’m a failure at, eh Tie?”
Something told her not to ask. She had to know. Five years she waited, five years apparently knocked Phantom clear from reality.“Does Danny Fenton mean anything to you?”
He just laughed harder at the question. “Really Tie?”
“Yes, really.”
“That’s the name I scream at em. Don’t know why. Feels good though.”
“Is it your name?” Had he had contact with Danny? Been part of whatever made him go missing from everyone’s lives? He couldn’t be, there was no way.
“They get reallllll angry when I say it is.”
There was no way the GIW had a human captive for five years. There was no way Phantom could be the Danny she knew. The ghost was just lying. He had to be, she desperately needed him to be. “Were you fused with a human or something? Got stuck when possessing someone?”
“Nah. Been like this before I got here, pretty sure. You can check your fancy gear though. There’s some non-ghost DNA in it. Lucky lucky me,” he lay back down in the mess of ectoplasm, ignoring how it clung to his hair. “Thanks for the Friday off! I hate those.”
There was no reason to need air. Talking to a ghost she didn’t even like shouldn’t make her feel like she was being crushed under a boulder. Panting for air, outside the room would make her look pathetic and weak, but she needed the space, needed to be away from that...mockery of a ghost.
“He does that to everyone. He’ll repeat the whole thing in a week or so, but he’s a really good copy the first time you see it.” The guard gave a comforting word, apparently unsurprised by her sudden unscheduled departure.
Oh, there would be no ‘next time.’ Not if he was right about her weapon. But she nodded instead, letting her ‘coworker’ think she was just overwhelmed. Even if all she could think of was how many ways this place would burn if that ghost- that thing had been a human once. She was good at telling when ghosts lied. Phantom didn’t sound like he had. No matter how much she tried to convince herself he did.
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Text
Almost Lost
For the Anon who requested : hello! i see that youre open for request, so please, can you write sirius x reader where they had a fight (sirius being flirty to others or anything), the reader just storm off and got kidnapped or hurt by death eater? an angst with fluff ending maybe? thank you so much
Sirius Black x Reader
“I said I was sorry!” Sirius yelled at you, following you as you stormed down the stairs, pushing past a confused looking James as you did. 
“Take your sorry and shove it up your arse!” You yelled back, stopped on the stairs to point your wand at the young man, “Get away from me,” You hissed. He stopped, holding his hands up defensively, but he looked beyond pissed. 
“Are you gonna hex me?” 
“Into next week,” You promised, before turning to walk away again, you were staying at the safe house the order was using, someone always had to be there, and this month it was up to you, Sirius, James and a newly pregnant Lily’s turn. 
“Y/N,” James tried to cut in, looking worriedly at his wife who shrugged helplessly from the sofa. When you and Sirius went at it, it was usually best to keep out. You two were both too fiery for your own good, and when you exploded, you exploded. But you always made up. 
“Shut it James,” You both barked, then turned to glare at each other as if to say, ‘how dare you’. You grabbed your coat off the back of a chair and pulled it on, Sirius came to you, trying to stop you. 
“Where are you going? What do you think you’re doing?” You yanked yourself out of his grip, continuing to pull the coat on. 
“Like it matters to you, go flirt with McKinnon some more why don’t you,” He threw his hands into the air, groaning loudly. 
“You’re insane,” He yelled, “Bonkers!” He tried to grab at you again, “And you’re not running off into the bloody night!” You shoved his chest, pushing him away from you, eyes burning with tears. 
“And you’re a slag! I’ll do whatever I please!” You cried, “You don’t get a say in what I do!” 
“Fine! Leave! And don’t come back!” He hollered and you stormed towards the front door, Sirius still in tow. 
“I will! I hate you!” You opened the door, feeling the frigid air of London in winter hit your face. You were grateful for the cold, you needed to cool down. You stepped outside and Sirius attempted to grab you once more, you wiggled out of his grasp. 
“Don’t-” He stopped, dropping his hands, “Say that!” You stopped at the bottom of the steps, looking up at Sirius in the doorway. You both didn’t say anything for a moment, just looked at each other. Finally, you broke eye contact, turning and walking away into the night. “Y/N!” He yelled after you, making to follow but James put a hand on him, stopping him.
“Mate, give her some space.” Sirius shook his head wildly, 
“It’s late and dark, she shouldn't be out alone.” He whispered, but James was already guiding him back into the house, “She said she hates me,” He muttered, dropping down into one of the armchairs. “Hates me!” 
“She doesn’t hate you,” Lily assured him, shaking her head. “She is angry with you, she hates when you act like a jerk. It’s different.” James sat next to Lily on the small sofa, wrapping an arm around her. 
“You were being a bit much mate, with the flirting.” 
“I wasn’t flirting!” James gave him a look and Sirius crossed his arms defensively over his chest. “I wasn’t.” 
“You were.” 
“Well, Y/N started it, she was being a bitch all morning, I just wanted some fun banter is all,” Lily looked at him disapprovingly, and Sirius groaned, throwing his hands up again. 
“I said she was being a bitch, not that she is one!” James nodded understandingly as Lily continued to purse her lips. The rest of the night was spent in relative silence. Sirius occasionally getting up to pace the small living room before looking out the window, like you’d be there, waiting on the steps. 
“She should be home by now,” He commented when the clock in the room struck midnight, “It’s my fault, I told her not to come back,” He was growing more and more worried by the minute. “I shouldn’t have said that,” 
“You both said things you didn’t mean,” Lily assured him, “She’s taking a mo for herself, maybe she went to Alice’s.” She tried to supply helpfully but Sirius wasn’t pacified. 
“I’m going to go look for her,” He decided, going to grab his own coat, James got up, putting a hand on his arm. 
“Give it another hour, let Lily mail Alice. If she isn’t back by one I’ll come with you, alright?” Sirius nodded his head slightly, tossing himself back down into the chair. James got Lily a quill and a piece of parchment, and owled her small note when she was finished writing it. Another hour and a quarter passed by tensely as they waited for the owl to return, Sirius still periodically checking the window. Finally there was a tap tap tap at the window and James went to let the owl back in. He opened the note as Sirius looked at it over his shoulder. 
“She’s not there, we need to go find her,” James nodded his head and sighed, handing the note off to Lily. 
“Alright, let’s go,” James agreed, grabbing his own coat as Sirius dashed towards the door- his coat forgotten. 
They searched for you everywhere. All the streets in a mile radius, every alley, every nook and cranny. Sirius even started calling your name, much to the sleeping cities delight. He was becoming frantic, and James was growing more and more worried for his friend and for you. 
“She always comes back, something is wrong,” Sirius stated, looking around wildly, practically spinning in a circle. James grabbed him, stopping him, Sirius looked at his friend with glistening eyes, “Something is wrong,” 
“Maybe she went home, it’s nearly three, maybe she is home, sitting with Lily and they’re talking about how big of tossers we are-”
“You know that isn’t true.” James nodded slightly. 
“Alright, where would she go, home?” Sirius shook his head. “Come on, Sirius, think, where would she go?” Something dawned on him. 
“There’s a park a few blocks from here, I know she’s gone there before. To think, when I’m being a git.” How did he not check there first? Godrick, he was a fool. 
“Come on then,” James nodded, “Let’s go,” They got to the park in record time, Sirius almost in a full on run, he went to the swings first, no one was there. Then he went and checked the benches on the other side of the park, also empty. 
“Y/N!” He yelled out, James looked around as well, knowing better than to shush his friend at this point. “Y/N!” There was a rustling in a nearby bush and Sirius’s head snapped to look at it, then he was running. He couldn’t see or hear or even think. All he saw was one of your gloves laying on the ground near where the sound came from. He reached the bush and what he saw made his heart stop beating in his chest, “Y/N,” He cried out, and James was beside him in a second. 
You were laying there, pale, dried blood around your scalp and mouth. He touched you and you were freezing. 
“James, give me your coat,” He barked out and James obliged immediately. Sirius wrapped you in the warm fabric, and pushed the dried blood laden hair from your face. Your eyes fluttered and you looked at him- or past him. Sirius didn’t think you were really seeing him, you weren’t all there. He did this. He did this to you. He made you so mad, you left, and you got hurt. He did this to you. 
“Siri?” You murmured, trying to lift a weak hand, he gripped the hand, squeezing your frozen digits in his hand. 
“Shh, love, don’t try and talk. You’re okay, you’re going to be okay,” He promised, he was crying, he watched as his tears landed on your pale cheek. He leaned down and kissed them away, “You’re okay,” 
“We need to get her home,” James stated, hand going to his friend's shoulder, “Come on,” Sirius gathered you in his arms, and lifted you, feeling your limp body in his arms. He wanted to squeeze you to him, to breathe life back into you somehow. The walk back home was tedious, James guiding Sirius through the dark streets back to the safe house. He reached the door first, propping it open as Sirius rushed inside. 
“Take her to the fire,” James ushered them in, “She needs to warm up,” 
“Merlin!” Lily cried, jumping to her feet when the group entered, eyes wide with horror, “What happened?” 
“We don’t know, we found her in the park, go get blankets Lil, please.” Lily was off in an instant to go find blankets and to boil some water for tea. Tea would help. Sirius sat down in front of the fire, laying you gently onto the carpet, your head in his lap. 
“Sirius?” You murmured, reaching out to him again, he held tightly to your hand, continuing to stroke your hair with his other hand. 
“You’re okay, love, I’m right here.” He promised you, “It’s okay,” Lily returned with blankets and helped Sirius wrap you in them. He held you as some of the color returned to your cheeks, as your body became to warm up, and you began to stir more. 
“Where am I?” You asked, groggily, and Sirius leaned down to kiss your forehead. 
“We’re at the safe house,” He whispered. Lily got her book of medicinal spells and sat beside the two in front of the fire, smiling smally at you. 
“Do you know what happened? So I can fix it?” 
“Were you followed?” You asked, and the other’s shared an uneasy look. 
“What?” James asked and you sat up slightly, eyes still unfocused, but full of panic. 
“Death eaters, found me, did they follow you back from the park?” 
“Y/N,” Lily spoke softly as Sirius continued to hold you, pulling you closer to him. “What did they do to you,” 
“ Cruciatus Curse,” You managed to spit out, “Until I couldn’t see or breath or move,” Sirius winced, again pulling you closer. Lily let her medical book fall shut with a small gasp. 
“Oh, Y/N,” She gushed, “I.. None of this will help, I think we have some Peppering Up potion in the kitchen, I’ll be right back.” She stood up, looking pointedly at James who followed her into the kitchen to give you a moment alone. You were coming back into yourself, and you sat up furter, looking at your boyfriend. 
“I’m sorry,” You whispered and he tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. 
“Why are you sorry?” He asked, gently, “This is all my fault,” You shook your head, eyes welling up with tears. 
“All I kept thinking was... was I’m gonna die, and the last thing I said to you was I hate you, I’m so sorry,” You voice broke and tears were streaming down your cheeks. Sirius pulled you into a hug before pulling back far enough to kiss your lips- then each each, your chin, your nose and finally your forehead. 
“I was so scared, I knew something bad had happened. I said so much I regretted saying, I am so so sorry, I am an arse, and I don’t deserve you. Or your love.” He whispered. You hugged him back, burying your face into the nook of his neck. 
“I love you, I could never hate you,” You promised and he squeezed you to him. 
“I know, I know. It’s okay, you’re okay, we’re okay.” He assured, over and over, “We’re okay. I love you too, so much.” You laid on the floor in front of the fire, embracing. Lily came in and dropped off the potion before saying goodnight, taking James with her. You spread out in front of the fire, cuddled up under the blankets. Your head was on Sirius’s chest and you listened to his heart beating strong beneath his jumper. All he could think of was how scared he was he almost lost you. How he would have never been able to forgive himself. How he couldn’t lose you, not now, not ever. 
“Y/N?” He asked into the quiet room, seeing if you were still awake. 
“Hm?” He took your left hand in his, and ran a finger over your knuckles. 
“Marry me?” You lifted your head and gazed up at him. 
“Seriously?” You asked, and he grinned down at you. 
“I’m always serious.” He joked and you managed to roll your eyes at the man, “Yes I am serious. I learned an important lesson today, and I am so stupid. I am such a fool, that you had to get hurt for me to learn it. I need you, Y/N, today, tomorrow, forever. I want you to be my wife.” You looked at him for another long minute, seeing in his eyes how genuine he truly was. Finally you put your head back down on his chest, letting your eyes fall shut. 
“Of course I’ll marry you,” He wrapped his arms around you and kissed the top of your head. He would never tell you not to come home again. That much he was sure.
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