apollo’s confidence in court: oh my god i’m the worst lawyer ever my client is going to go to JAIL because i can’t even do my JOB
apollo’s confidence outside of court: i’m the only smart one here, i’m the most normal guy in the world and NO ONE is doing it like i am, investigations are EASY, klavier gavin wants me carnally
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Duke: Bruce, can you sign something for school?
Bruce, shaking his head: If I sign this, you're going to have to learn how to forge my signature. If you sign it from the start, you'll be able to sign whatever you want and they'll never know.
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Saw something where someone said do you think Regulus died at night so the sun didn’t have to watch? WHAT. THE. FUCK??
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[At a coffee place]
Y/N: *returns from the bathroom to the line*
Y/N: *walks up to Gojo and grabs his hand*
Y/N: This is crazy.
Gojo: *looks at Y/N*
Gojo: Um...
Y/N: *looks at Gojo*
Y/N: You're not my boyfriend.
Geto, from behind Y/N and Gojo: You're holding the wrong hand, Y/N.
Y/N: You sure?
Gojo: Yeah, we're sure.
Y/N: I feel compelled to finish this coffee experience with you.
Gojo: I'm not paying.
Y/N: Never mind, I'm going back to my boyfriend.
Geto: I'm not paying either.
Shoko, at the front of the line: Come hold my hand. I'll buy you anything you want.
Y/N: *goes to hold Shoko’s hand*
Y/N: At least somebody cares about me.
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Y/N: At least two gay girls called me cute...
Natasha, with a flirty voice: Make that three...
Wanda, also flirting: Make that four...
Y/N, confused: Who are the other two??
Natasha, facepalming: Oh my god...
Wanda: Nevermind, back to two...
Y/N, in utter confusion: What is happening??
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Aziraphale, seeing Crowley walk in: So, do I have a husband or a wife today?
Crowley: Since you ate the last slice of pizza you have an enemy.
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Jason: *gets pulled over*
Comm. Gordon, whispering into his radio: Not our guy. This one's got pants.
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