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who-always-pays-their-taxes · 2 days

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“that’s not accurate to the comics!!” I couldn’t care less, these r my dolls and I will do whatever I want to them, i’m playing house goddamnit!! lemme live in my delusions!! It’s called feeding ur inner child!!!

#dcu #batfam #batman #batfamily #bruce wayne #jason todd #tim drake #timkon #batkids #red robin

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incorrectbatfam · 2 days

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Bruce: Damian, why do you torment me?

Damian: I am your hubris manifested.

#source: tumblr #bruce wayne #batman #damian wayne #robin #batfamily #batfam #batboys #batbros #batkids #batsiblings #batman family #incorrect batfamily quotes #incorrect quotes #incorrect dc quotes #dc comics

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neptunezo · 2 days

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Out of the blue, Bruce announces to the batfam, that he does, in fact, have a favorite child. He proposes a challenge, that anyone who can guess the favorite child gets first dibs on Alfreds cooking for a whole month (practically winning the lottery) so the batkids are now invested.

Damian immediately guesses Dick, fully under the impression that he’s right and Bruce is just trying to play mind games with them. Damian was incorrect.

Dick guesses Jason after finding out it’s not him, he was wrong, it’s not Jason.

Now Jason is intrigued, he’s noticed Tim still hasn’t guessed but is probably analyzing everything. Knowing Tim takes awhile (even if he is always correct) Jason goes ahead and guesses anyways, completely confident in his answer. Jason guesses Duke, he is incorrect.

Babs, knowing she isn’t one of Bruces kids so she doesn’t count for this challenge (because if she did it would obviously be her) she guesses Damian, the obvious choice. His biological son. Bruce smirks and shakes his head.

Duke guesses Tim, an answer that would make the most sense. I mean, Tim is practically Bruce 2.0, but he isn’t the favorite child.

Suddenly it clicks, Tim is now frustrated it took him so long to see. Obviously the favorite is Cass, who else could it be?? Tim almost has a tantrum when told he was wrong.

Now everyone is confused, they’ve gone through all of his kids. Tim doesn’t know why he hasn’t solved this puzzle yet. He looks for more clues and sees Cass wearing a ring. An engagement ring. The same one Steph is also wearing. It finally makes sense.

“I know who it is,” Tim brags. “But I’ve already used my guess, so Cass, please do the honors.”

Cass then points to Stephanie. Bruce has the biggest grin on his face as his nods. This is how they all find out that Cass and Steph are getting married.

#bruces favorite child will always be stephanie #he says he loves all his kids equally right up until she marries into the family #then anytime anyone asks he solomy nods while very seriously saying stephanie brown #i love my sapphic girls #batman #jason todd #batkids #damian wayne #man i love batman #batfam #tim drake #dick grayson #duke thomas #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #stephcass #babs gordon #barbra gordon

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goodoldfashionedengineer · 2 days

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The Batkids all decide to go into med school just to spite Bruce because he dropped out.

They might have overestimated themselves because it quickly becomes more of a challenge of "Who can do this the longest?"

Barbara is laughing at them over the comms.

#batfam #batfamily #batman #batkids #batsiblings #this idea is purely for fun and is not meant to be taken seriously #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #stephanie brown #cassandra cain #duke thomas #barbara gordon #damian wayne #damian al ghul #bruce wayne #batdad

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shyjusticewarrior · 2 days

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Duke: What are you doing here?

Duke: ... Your excellency.

Damian: You don't call her "your excellency."

Talia: No, no, I kinda like it.

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audhd-nightwing · 2 days

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“dick grayson is the favorite child”

let’s be real here, the eldest child is never the favorite. they’re just the one saddled with the most responsibility.

#the correct answer is damian solely bc he’s the youngest #youngest is always the favorite sorry guys #dick grayson #bruce wayne #batkids #batfamily #batman #dc comics #nightwing #idk what else to tag

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zodarii-dae · 2 days

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the batkids absolutely have a shared spotify account. they each have playlists with the songs they like to listen to while patrolling/doing cases/training/etc.

it’s very popular; gothamites absolutely love listening to it. there have been physical fights over who has the best music taste. sometimes, if they know there’s going to be a specific bat around, they’ll play their playlist. red hood’s is playing somewhere in crime alley pretty much all the time.

the only person who doesn’t have access is bruce, because he might delete the ‘fuck batman’ playlist (which is, of course, a playlist of all the songs bruce hates. they play it whenever he annoys them).

they even have specific playlists for fighting different rogues. oracle can and will take over any speakers she can find to play them.

#batman #batfam #batkids #dcu #dc comics #gotham #batfam headcanons #batfam hcs #bruce wayne #zdae thinks

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vodrae · 23 hours

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If Batman is the Big Black Bat, Cassandra is the Small Black Bat. Thanks for coming.

#batman #batfamily #batfam #dc comics #bruce wayne #cassandra wayne #cassandra cain #batkids #batkid #batgirls #batgirl #black bat #dc orphan

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ahfrickenfrick · 9 hours

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the batkids decide play a new game on patrol where they try to yell the most outrageous thing jumping into a fight

bruce bans the game after stephanie runs into a crowd of bystanders and muggers yelling

‘bienvenue power bottoms!’

and it causes jason to crash into a power pole from how hard he was laughing

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tammysart · 2 days

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a quite night of catching wayward Robins ~

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nightwolf14292 · 2 days

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Hey! Look! An overdone meme! Still fun to draw tho

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who-always-pays-their-taxes · 2 days

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joker jr is truly one of my favorite things in the world, it’s so good!! the angst!! the tramua is so scrumptious!! I am salivating over how complex it makes Jason and Tim’s relationships

#dcu #batfam #batman #batfamily #bruce wayne #jason todd #tim drake #batkids #red robin #joker jr #tim drake is joker jr #red hood

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incorrectbatfam · 18 hours

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Jason: We do this the old-fashioned way

Jason: *pulls out a Molotov cocktail*

Dick: How did you make that so fast?!

#source: the good place #jason todd #red hood #dick grayson #nightwing #batman #batfamily #batfam #batboys #batkids #batbros #batsiblings #batman family #incorrect batfamily quotes #incorrect quotes #incorrect dc quotes #dc comics

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brucewaynehater101 · 2 days

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I need more fanwork of one of the batkids (I'm voting Tim, Cass, or Duke) looking at someone and telling the rest of the Bats that the vibes are off.

Legit, some person who seems ordinary or nice gets vibe checked by specific batkids (who are known for making instant accurate deductions of character).

Just the kid going, "I don't like them," and the other Bats nodding as if this is perfectly logical reasoning.

#batfam #batkids #could be the reverse of someone looking at a “bad” guy and going “i like this one” and so the unsuspecting person gets friended by the bats

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nenehyuuchiha · 3 days

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: DCU, Batman - All Media Types Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Cassandra Cain & Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Duke Thomas & Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne & Damian Wayne Characters: Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent, Dick Grayson, Cassandra Cain, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Duke Thomas, Damian Wayne, Hal Jordan (Green Lantern), Barry Allen, Oliver Queen, Diana (Wonder Woman), J'onn J'onzz, Arthur Curry (DCU) Additional Tags: De-Aged Batfamily (DCU), De-Aged Dick Grayson, De-Aged Cassandra Cain, De-Aged Jason Todd, De-Aged Tim Drake, De-Aged Duke Thomas, De-Aged Damian Wayne, Good Parent Bruce Wayne, Bruce Wayne is Good With Kids, BatKids are little shits, Crack Treated Seriously, chaos gremlin, Humor, Bad Jokes, batman is a Weirdo, Poor Life Choices, Bruce is a Troll, Bruce Wayne is a Little Shit, Batfamily Meets the Justice League (DCU), Crack, Fluff and Crack, Attempt at Humor Summary:

Clark liked to think that years of being a superhero and being part of the Justice League had prepared him for everything.

What else could the world throw at him that he hadn’t seen before?

Well, apparently the world could throw Batman walking in with a child in arms, a huge purse on his shoulder, and a gaggle of children chatting and following quick behind him.

Your obligatory 'the batkids get de-aged' fic.

#Batman #superman #batkids #Bruce Wayne #Cassandra Cain #Jason Todd #dick Grayson #Damian Wayne #duke Thomas #Tim Drake #batfam #fic rec #batfamily #justice league #crack fic

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shyjusticewarrior · 3 days

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Rose went to the Stephanie Brown school of flirting with batboys

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