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#im so sat it got rushed toward the end because my mom was forcing me to go to bed and i didnt want to postpone this

wisteriabookss · 3 years

Text

My ACOSF Review (2/5 Stars)

Please respect my opinions. Not everything I say will be praiseful or nice. While I liked a lot of this book, a lot of it frustrated and bothered me.

This review contains spoilers. Read at your own risk.

This review will be more of an overall impression, and I will get more in depth about certain characters in future posts.

I eventually got into the plot of the book, but I don’t think it was as great or creative as it could’ve been. I feel like SJM recycled ideas she’s already used to create the storyline. A quest to find a magic object that can stop a war and save the world? That sentence applies to both ACOWAR and ACOSF. It’s even more disappointing when you know there were other routes the plot could’ve taken but were eventually scratched. It was the perfect set up for an Illyrian mountain setting, it was written in canon, and, unsurprisingly, SJM retconned and changed it.

The Valkyrie plot was cool, if a bit forced and out of place. Nesta barely starts training, and all of a sudden she wants to recreate a powerful band of female warriors that we’ve never heard of in the context of this world? Honestly, it feels like SJM watched Thor: Ragnarok, and was like, “Yes, that’s what I’m gonna do.” I thought Helions winged horses would come into play with that, but I guess we’ll have to see.

I thought the Blood Rite plot was gone, but we got it in the end, even though it was rushed. The most beautiful parts of the book happened during the Rite, so I’m glad we got to see those.

The ending of Briallyn was so swift I literally had to go back a page to make sure I read it right. Literally one page, and she’s killed. I expected more. I can’t say I'm surprised by how rushed her death was when I knew the Feysand trouble was approaching, and the number of pages left was getting smaller. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that SJM would save Rhys, Feyre, and their baby. Out of the entire ensemble in Kingdom of Ash, she only had the heart to kill Gavriel, who wasn’t too much of a main character. There was no way in hell she would do that to Feysand.

I’m sorry, but I do not like the name Nyx. Imagine calling someone Nyx? Did she originally have it as Nick, but just needed to put an X? My eyes were rolling so hard when I read it. Just put an ‘O’ in front of it and end our misery, though I still would’ve rolled my eyes at that name too. The name just reminds me of all the blogger moms who put X’s in their child’s names for dramatic effect that ends up looking like they can’t spell.

I also didn’t appreciate the out of touch colloquialisms in this book either. Prythian doesn’t have a name for anxiety, depression, or PTSD, but they know what lactic acid means?

The amount of sex in this book was something we had been warned to expect, and I think due to the fastness of me reading this book (finished in two sittings), it made it feel like the sex was happening every other page, which it basically was. I’m not going to be mad though because a) it was well written, b) I didn’t feel like it harmed the plot too much, and c) this is the only Nessian smut we’re going to see in canon. But that threesome line with Az. . . y'all know which one I’m talking about. . . the one with the details about certain positions. . . chile um anyways let’s move on.

I called it months ago that Emerie would either be Mor or Azriel’s love interest, and looks like it’s going to be Mor. SJM’s writing is fairly predictable, especially when it comes to romantic ships, and she couldn’t have been more obvious about the two of them. I will write about Gwyn and Azriel in Azriel’s chapter review (cause that monstrosity needs a post of its own).

Now about Nesta’s healing arc. Some of it was satisfying and others were saddening. I’m happy that Nesta was able to find purpose in her life, and not believe herself to be worthless or pathetic, but strong and powerful. I’m happy she found Gwynn and Emerie; I love their friendship. I love how they stuck by each other no matter what, and saw the good and potential in one another.

However, even by the end of the book, Nesta still thinks herself as undeserving. Of Cassian, of love. She knows she has it, and she's so grateful for it, but she still believes she is undeserving of it, that Cassian is just so much better than her. A part of learning to love and live with yourself is knowing what you deserve, so why SJM took that from her character, I don’t know. I was continuously disappointed when said she was undeserving of anything, even after she had learned and grown from her mistakes.

Maybe SJM thinks the belief of being undeserving of one's partner is romantic. I’m telling you now, it’s not. All that does is give unnecessary power to a person you believe you are undeserving of, and this leads to unequal power dynamics in a relationship. Rhys was the exact same with Feyre, so I’m guessing it's a theme.

Speaking of romantic themes, the repetition of the “your mine-im yours” line in this book was nauseating. Your going to make Nesta say the exact same thing her sister said when they had sex? Is there nothing else SJM could’ve come up with? It’s just so weird. And I swear to god if I see Elain do the same thing I’m gonna vomit.

Nesta apologized to Cassian about what she said to him on Solstice in ACOFAS as if he never called her unlovable. As if he never said he didn’t understand why her sisters love her. He never apologized for that. There was so much apologizing from Nesta to Cassian about her calling him a brute, as if Cassian didn’t say he was “shackled” to her after she clearly explained how she feared she would lose her humanity if she accepted the word mate. Not if she accepted him, but the word.

For Cassian to routinely tell Nesta to, “shut her fucking mouth,” when she used some attitude against Rhys was comical. Rhys has been bad mouthing and disrespecting Nesta this whole time, and when she shows some warranted attitude in return (not even an insult), Cassian rips into her. It doesn’t matter what he did for you, babe. Not everyone has the same experience with Rhys, so Cassian getting angry when Nesta showing anger at the way she was being treated was wrong. Her experience with him does not become invalidated just because Cassian has a good relationship with him.

There wasn’t a character arc for Cassian, which was one of the most disappointing parts of the book. He thinks of himself as inferior and undeserving as well, and by the end of the book it’s not even clear if that stance has changed. We saw him grow into the courtier persona in the meeting with Eris when Tamlin shows up, but we never see it again. I know there were instances in which he stood up for Nesta, but he also very quicky after that became silent in other moments when they were insulting her. The next book isn’t in his pov, but I’m hoping we see him become more confident in himself and make a firmer stance to protect Nesta (although I doubt he’ll need to seeing as how Rhys kisses the ground she walks on now).

Now onto Nesta’s apologies to the IC. I think Nesta apologizing to Feyre was expected, and I’m glad the sisters had that moment. I am, however, upset that there was never a moment where all the sisters sat down, and hashed it out. Talked about what they’d been through, how it affected them, and how it affected their feelings toward each other. After everything that happened between Nesta and Elain, all that hurt, you’re telling me all it took was Nesta to make Elain laugh by saying “fuck you,” and we’re good? It’s lazy writing.

Elain telling Nesta that she only cared about how her trauma affected her did not sit right with me. Nesta sat by Elain’s side for weeks when she was in the thick of her struggles, and refused to leave her alone for fear that her struggles would eat her up alive. She constantly looked for anything that could help her sister, and never left her unprotected. Nesta and Elain didn’t communicate after the war, for reasons that we now know was because of Nesta’s guilt for Elain being kidnapped. It is not abnormal when a family member has been traumatized by things that have happened to another family member. That’s expected. Ask any family who has lost a child or had a relative go through something horrible.

Elain is acting as if Nesta has only ever been concerned with herself when she’s spent her entire life concerned with Elain. I made a post long ago about how the IC only wanted Nesta to heal for their sake rather than her sake, and there’s so much more evidence for that than for Elain. Elain’s healing process was able to be understood and encouraged by the IC, whereas they had no idea what to do with Nesta. So for Elain to come at Nesta for not caring about her trauma, a second after Nesta was trying to protect her from further trauma by telling her she didn't want her seering for the Trove, was unwarranted.

Speaking about Elain looking for the Trove, what happened there? Elain had this whole speech where she said she wanted to do something and no one could stop her and then we just. . . don’t hear anything about it again? SJM had a perfect opportunity to do something powerful with Elain there, and completely threw it away.

Nesta’s apology to Amren was extreme, dramatic, and honestly, unnecessary. Amren called Nesta a “pathetic waste of life,” constantly demeaned and degraded her anytime her name was mentioned, and said she did all this because Nesta used her as a shield against her problems and the IC. Seriously? Nesta using Amren as a shield does not warrant that kind of verbal abuse. It doesn't make her a pathetic waste of life. Amren’s been alive for how long? And reacts like that to an obvious side effect of extreme trauma? No ma'am. Nesta getting on her damn knees was too much, and obviously just another moment, like a lot of moments, that SJM felt the need to make dramatic. And then having the audacity to let Amren say to Nesta that, “the struggle with the darkness is worth it,” when she was one of those people who contributed to that darkness is disgusting.

I didn’t like Rhys at all in this book. Even after he saw inside Nesta’s mind about her experience in the cauldron, he was still wary and rude with her. Literally anytime Nesta showed that she was changing, Rhys didn’t change anything about his attitude or behavior towards her. A moment of regret, and then he’s back to being arrogant ass Rhys. Him not telling Feyre about the baby was also extremely stupid. It’s her body, her life, her baby’s life, his life, and she had a right to know what was happening. Not telling her because you didn’t want her to be “upset,” is a dumb excuse. I thought you always promised to let her make her own decisions, Rhys? What happened to that promise? The one that was a hell of a lot better than the stupid bargain ya’ll made? Though Nesta told her out of anger, good on her for telling her sister. Should’ve happened way sooner. His apology to Nesta was the only one that warranted the dramatics. That is what you get on your knees for.

That whole scene about him becoming High King had me throwing the book. Amren telling Rhys that the swords were some sort of mother-mary-cauldron-blessed-hallelujah sign that he was supposed to be High King had me fuming. It’s Nesta’s power. It’s Nesta’s sword. That should have never been a discussion. Not everything is for Rhys. These people are so blinded by their love for him they can’t even see how arrogant he is. To write Nesta giving back Ataraxia made me so angry after we just had a whole moment where we find out it means inner peace. I just hope that all of this is not foreshadowing Rhys becoming High King. I know you love him Sarah, but please don’t.

All in all, this book wasn’t too bad. There were some great moments and some bad moments. I think SJM’s biggest issue in her writing is that she doesn’t outline, or at least doesn't seem to outline, not thoroughly. I feel like she uses plot devices willy nilly whenever it’s the easiest solution. There was never a moment where I said, “that was clever!” A lot of it was cool, but not clever. Not creative. She also has a tendency to write very dramatically, in staccato type sentences where everything is made into a big moment, which bugs me a lot.

I love Nesta. She’s still my fav, and will probably always be my fav. This book doesn’t change that, and as you can tell in my review, most of the issues I had weren’t with her behavior, but with the behavior of other characters. I still love Cassian, even though he made me want to rip my hair out sometimes.

Will I read the next books? Probably. I can’t seem to stay away from these characters or these books, so kudos to SJM for writing them. I know a majority of people have given this book 4 or 5 stars, but I can’t bring myself to give it more than 2/5.

#nesta #cassian #nessian #acosf #a court of silver flames #sjm #nesta archeron #nesta x cassian #cassian x nesta #feysand #feyre #feyre archeron #rhysand #elain #elain archeron #amren #sarah j maas #nesta stan #nestastan

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hyperfixdccoms · 3 years

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The Start (1)

The Flame Within The Ice

'You need to always remember that the powers we go to are meant to be hidden away. No one should ever know about them, no matter what. Grimoire, do you hear me?!'

' Grimoire baby, you know why I called you Grimoire? In our family tree, we had witches who worked to gain the powerful book of the summoning spirits called the Grimoire a long time ago. While you are not the book, we have a special connection toward the beyond. We do not practice the craft, but we have been passed down powers from our ancestors. We carry the fire that burns throw our vain and the Ice that helps us calculate every move. We are special. You are special, Grim.'

' Grimoire Im sorry it has to be like this. We, I can't keep on protecting you like this. You will end up dead. I'll leave you here where you are safe with Viena.'

" Grimoire, It's time to get up!" Yelled a prominent voice that sounded like a middle-aged woman. It was relatively early in the morning. The people that were up at this time were ready to leave home, kissing their spouse goodbye and their kids, and good luck at school. Children waking up at this time, getting ready with their book bags, and eating their breakfast remains to catch the bus.

" Dammit, this child. Grimoire Vi llan, Get your damm ass up before I do something. You won't even see it coming." The women shouted again. After a few minutes, a five-foot-six androgynous-looking teen came downstairs. " Grim, you can't keep on doing this. I got work, and I have bills to pay." The women complain, rushing around the kitchen still not looking at the teen. When she turned around, she noticed the rather ghostly pale-looking skin from the teen. She sighed, giving Grimoire a sad smile. " I made you your favorite pancake pb&j." She said, trying to get a reaction from the teen.

Not moving from his place, Grimoire chewed on his lips, picking on the skin of his nails. His long wavy hair was hidden under a crochet beanie that he had done in his free time. The average height teen wore a thin black long-sleeved shirt with a soft blue crocheted vest on. His pants were just some regular vintage denim jeans with some classic black Chuck Taylor shoes.

Grimoire shifted from one leg to another with his weight. His bag resting wine red canvas backpack rest on his left shoulder. He felt uncomfortable with the silence. Thankfully, His aunt Viena didn't ask any questions but gave him a comforting hug, but to him, it felt like that night he was tensed. " You look just like your mother and your father. It's almost surreal. They would be so proud to see you grown up like this." Viena was the sister of Grimoire's father. She was always there, and when his parent died from the accident, she took him in with open arms.

" Morie, I know you don't think you can trust in yourself. But it is not your fault. Thorn and Golgotha Would never fault you for something you can't control yet." Viena said, cupping Grimoire's face. Viena lost in Grimoire's eyes the same eyes as her big brother's icy blue and fiery red eyes. Viena held herself from shedding a tear. Lucky to hear the alarm of the bus coming soon rang, she cleared her throat and gave her nephew a smile. "I'll pack you your pancake. You should be ready. If you are missing something, go get it." Viena said, going to pack the pancake in a sandwich bag and putting it inside a paper bag. Viena came back to Grimoire, who was standing at the doorsteps. She handed Grimoire his paper bag and said her goodbyes. Viena stood at the doorstep, seeing her brother's baby walking away.

Grimoire took out some gloves his father had given him to help maintain his power from spiking out. Of course, his body emitted different temperatures, and he could easily adjust to any temperature. It was pretty gray outside, even for an early morning. The fallen dead leaf scattered around the neighborhood made it even more unsettling like always. Grimoire turned on his headphones, turning on his walkman playing the first song suggested Sowing Season by Brand New.

The soft guitar filling up his ears and the words filling his mind. His mind being transported to a reality of tranquility and peace. Grimoire closed his eyes, breathing in deep the clean air that cleansed his revolting mind. His right hand resting on his backpack band while his left hand is inside his pants pocket. Mumbling some words from the lyrics, he opened his eyes to see himself getting closer to the school bus stop.

Grimoire's eyes landed on the teenager he sees every day. The girl had pale skin, her hair colors dark purple. She seems to use the same outfit or at least the same shade of clothes every day. Ultimately Grimoire has come to an unspoken agreement with the girl. The two were outcasts, laughed at, and if anybody did something to stop it, they would get hurt. In conclusion, the two stuck a bit together if they could, like in the school bus sitting together, in class, if they could.

When the bus arrived, it was already packed with other students. Grimoire let the girl in first. He followed right behind, seeing the mess of a bus it was. He took a seat next to the girl keeping his distance yet close enough to not fall out of the uncomfortable love seat. The girl leaned on the window, looking out it was comfortable, nobody talking well except the kids from the back. Every time Grimoire turned to give the girl a side look, he couldn't help but admire her despite the shit she had to take in school. She doesn't flatter behind. She just keeps ongoing. The silence was pleasant until one of the kids teased us got between us from the chair behind.

"Boo!" The boy laughed, leaning close to the girl. "Come on. What are you hiding from?" He asked rather intrusively. He turned to look at Grimoire with a smirk " How about you? Are you some type of cult?" Grimoire could hear his buddies laughing, not really trying to play it off.

"You don't have to be shy with me." The boy said mockingly, leaning toward the girl said. Grimoire chewed on the inside of his cheek. He slowly reached to grab the girl's hand, squeezing it lightly to reassure her that it would be over soon. " I like freaks." He said, leaning closer to the girl. Grimoire could feel the girl squeezing his hand back as she turned her head away from the creep leaning toward her. "No? Well, maybe you would take the offer." The boy said with a sly tone, leaning toward Grimoire, who tilted his head down to avoid looking at the harasser.

Before the boy to lean any closer, a kid from the front with blond hair turned back, and with courage and tiredness, he said, " Leave them alone, Kyle." The attention from the three was brought to the blond boy named Matt. It was rare to see somebody trying to stand up for any of us. Matt was a student and part of the football team. "Don't you have a touchdown or something to throw, Matt?" Kyle said like it was a big insult or something. Matt stood up from his seat, facing toward the three of them. " Just leave them alone, asshole."

Grimoire and the girl looked rather worried that something could break out just because of them. "Before I make you." The two boys stood front to front from each other. The tiny walkway didn't help create space. Kyle shoved Matt backward " Maybe you should take a seat." Kyle said with a smirk. Of course, Matt wouldn't back down repeating Kyle's shove but with a bit more force. The kids had their eyes on the two boys, who were now throwing punches at each other. Some kids were encouraging the fight. Grimoire let a shaken breath out while the girl looked at the two fightings wanting to do something to help the fight stop. "Sit back down! Both of you! Now!" The bus driver yelled as he drove. The two boys pulled away, panting hard while glaring at each other. The rowdy kids encouraging the fight were disappointed the two had stopped fighting.

When the two broke apart before Kyle sat down, he menacingly leaned toward us. "Sluts" He said, very pronounced. Kyle turned away to sit on his seat. The girl turned to look out to the window while Grimoire sighed, taking his hand away from the girl's hand. His head lowered in humiliation.

Grimoire and the girl got out together when they got to school, walking inside the school building. The two had a locker on the opposite side of the hallways. Grimoire stuffed his book into his locker, seeing a picture of his parent on the locker's door. He felt a wave of guilt, sadness, and anger. He didn't understand why couldn't he had been born without these powers. Why couldn't he be like his aunt, as his mom? Normal. Grimoire turns to the side as he heads his bus companion speak up, " Uh.Matt.Thanks for..." The group of boys just bypass her with no second look. The girl turns to look up at Grimoire. He could only offer her a small ghost smile before she turned away.

He sighs, closing his locker. The girl had come to his side of the locker before offering him a small smile. She took Grimoire's hand " Thank you for sticking with me." She said shyly. Grimoire felt his heart race avoiding her face finding his shoes much more interesting. " No problem." He let out in a whisper. "Rachel. My name is Rachel Roth. Im sure you heard it from the teachers, but. I think a bit of a formal introduction is better." The girl now named Rachel introduced herself. Grimoire's eyes slowly scan from bottom to top Rachel, who was holding his mitted hand. " Grimoire. Grimoire Vi llan. Nice to meet you, Rachel Roth." Grimoire returned the gesture of politeness. His voice, airy yet melodious, reached Rachel's ears, who had a faint blush on growing.

The bell brought them out from the special moment. What they didn't know is that from there, nothing would be the same.

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junghosunshine · 4 years

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Shut In

pairing: Kim Taehyung X reader

word count: 4k+

summary: Without a place to stay after you are kicked out of your dorm amidst the Coronavirus outbreak, you have no choice but to stay with Kim Taehyung (the son of one of your moms friends whom you have never met). You worry that it will be awkward but you are pleasantly surprised by the bond you end up forming with the overly welcoming man.

warnings: Smut, Fluff, overprotective, slightly dom!tae, mentions of covid19 and quarantine, age gap (5 years), unprotected sex (please use protection guys)

notes: This was written to calm me down while being stuck in my house in no way am I trying to offend anyone. Please go easy on me i’m sensitive :)

_______________________________________________________________________

You should probably be thankful that you have somewhere to stay during quarantine but at this particular moment you were dreading the next few weeks.

“Mom, why can’t I just stay in a hotel?” You asked over the phone. You knew you were being irrational and that this was much better than paying a hundred dollars a night (even if you would feel much more comfortable). Ever since your classes had been canceled, you had been living in the dorms at your college but they had begun to kick students out. Going to school overseas seemed like such a fun idea, and it probably would have been, but because you were in another country during the corona virus outbreak, there was no way you could get home especially with the travel restrictions. You had called your mom sobbing, worried that you would be homeless through the pandemic in a country you barely knew. Luckily, within an hour your mom had reached out to one of her friends who had a son living in Seoul and you suddenly had a place to stay. “Mom, that is going to be so weird. I don’t know him and now I’m going to live with him. Alone. For who knows how long?!”

“Y/N, I’m not paying money for you to stay in a hotel when there is a perfectly good, free place for you to stay. This is the only option.”

You gave in knowing your arguments were useless against this woman. You just wanted to go home and see your family and to be honest you were scared at how big this whole thing had become.

“Okay. Stay safe mom. Love you.”

“I love you too sweetie. Be careful and make sure you thank Taehyung for giving up his space.”

After you hung up with your mom you felt a bit empty. This much change in only a few days was a lot to take in and processing it all was near impossible. ‘Its going to be okay’ you told yourself.Your had mom told you that Taehyung was 24 and she had seen him a few times when he had just been born but didn’t know much about him other than that he apparently worked as a graphic designer for a popular art company. She had gone to college with his mom and they had been very close until mom moved to the US after college. Regardless of your mom’s connection, it felt awkward to be moving into some complete stranger’s space.

——————————————————————————————————————————

Pulling up the email your mom had sent you, you found the address to Taehyung’s house and his phone number. Sighing, you forced yourself to send him a text to let him know you were coming to his place.

To: XXX-XXX-XXXX

iMessage: Hi, this is Y/N… my mom just sent me your address. I should be there in about an hour. Thanks for letting me stay with you.

You put your phone back in your pocket and gathered you bags. Struggling to stand upright you wobbled out of your dorm and made your way to the subway.

Thanks to the virus the subway was not crowded and you had a place to rest all of your stuff. Once you sat down your phone vibrated and you pulled it out to see a response from Taehyung.

iMessage: Y/N, it is my pleasure! My mom told me to treat you well since you are her best friend’s daughter. Ill see you soon!

He was sweet. You felt yourself relax a bit. Maybe it wouldn’t be as awkward as you had thought it would be. You certainly hoped you were right otherwise this was going to be the most uncomfortable period of time you have ever experienced.

Once you were off the subway you lugged your bags up to the street level. Looking around your confidence wavered a bit. You had only been living in Korea for the last few months for college and while you went out a lot but you rarely ventured outside of the college area. The fact that there was no one outside made it even harder because you couldn’t ask anyone for directions. Oh no, there was no way you were going to find his building. You typed the address into Maps and attempted to both hold all of your stuff and navigate.

You were having very little luck and you were afraid your phone was going to die if you continued like this. As you stopped to calm yourself down, your phone rang.

“Hello?”

“Y/N?”

“Oh hi, is this Taehyung?”

“Yeah, Im just calling to make sure you’re okay. You said you’d be here in an hour two hours ago and my mom would kill me if anything happened to you.”

“Oh… Uh…” As much as you didn’t want to cry you couldn’t help yourself. It had been a long few days and the fact that you couldn’t even navigate was infuriating. “Im a little lost.” You managed to say through tears.

“Are there any restaurants or stores near you?” He asked. Looking around you found you were next to a pet store.

“There is pet store near me and I’m right across from a park.”

You heard shuffling from his end of the line. “Okay,” He said finally. “Wait there I’m coming to get you.”

——————————————————————————————————————————

Exhausted, you sank to the ground and rested your head on your knees. It was embarrassing that Taehyung had to go out of his way to find you before you had even met him. He probably thought you were incompetent. And it was even worse that there was an outbreak going on.

Only a few minutes had passed when a black Hyundai pulled up next to you. A guy got out and walked toward you.

“Y/N?” You looked up at him as he came to a stop above you. You nodded and embarrassed yourself by pouting a little. Something you did at home when you were sad or angry. You noticed immediately how striking he was with dark hair that fell into his eyes. He was distractingly handsome and as you stood up, you noticed, very tall as well. Taehyung smiled warmly and reached for your bags. “Go sit in the car, i'll load these in the back.” You complied grateful that he didn’t seem upset with you. He loaded your bags into the trunk and returned to the drivers seat.

“Im Tae by the way.” You took his extended hand.

“I am so sorry for inconveniencing you like this especially now. I promise i’ll make it up to you. I’m not usually this helpless.” Taehyung chuckled. “No problem. I’m glad I had an excuse to go out one last time before the lockdown.” You blushed at his kindness and were relieved when he began to drive.

Taehyung’s apartment was very clean and well decorated. You could immediately tell he was into art as his walls were covered in it. It was an open concept and the living room was only separated from the kitchen by a large kitchen island. He led you across the flat to a door on the far side, opening it to a small bedroom. It looked as if it had never been used and it smelled very clean. There was a large window overlooking the city and you gasped at how pretty it was.

“I’m glad I finally have someone here to use the guest bedroom. It was getting kinda lonely here.” It was shocking how welcoming he was considering you were dumped on him at the last possible moment.

“Thank you so much.” You walked in and he helped place your bags on the bed before leaving you to unpack.

That night, He made you dinner. It was so odd since it had been months since you’d eaten like a normal human. College life was certainly not luxurious. He waited for you to take the first bite and hum with pleasure before he was satisfied enough to eat.

“So, you were attending college here.” He said. You nodded. “Yeah I’m in my second year at Yonsei. Er- was.”

“This virus is kinda fucking things up isn’t it?”

“Yeah, Im kinda pissed off that I can’t even see my family during it.” Taehyung nodded. “Well I’m lucky that you are keeping me company right now.” You coughed and he watched amusedly as you tried to cover up your awkwardness by taking a sip of water.

“How old are you?” He asked you. “Nineteen.” You replied. He smiled a secret smile before taking another bite of his food.

“Thank you so much for dinner.” You said when you had both finished. He shrugged like it was nothing. “Im happy to do it.”

You tried to help him with dishes but he insisted that you get some rest after your long day.

——————————————————————————————————————————

Usually you woke up around seven the morning so that you could get started on the day but with nothing to do, it seemed a bit unnecessary. Still, your internal clock was hard to reset so despite your empty schedule, you were up. You assumed that Taehyung was probably asleep so you made your way into the kitchen and put on some hot water for tea. This was a ritual of yours. That you had been taught by your mother.

Unconsciously you began humming and you didn’t notice that Taehyung had exited his bedroom or that he was standing shirtless at the kitchen island smiling as he watched you work. You looked cute with your little shorts and oversized t-shirt he was going to have a hard time not thinking about that all day. Turning, you let out a yelp when you saw him, spilling hot tea on your had and causing the mug to break on the ground.

Taehyung immediately rushed over to you and grabbed your wrist before you could pick up any of the pieces of ceramic. “Are you hurt?” The way he looked at you with so much concern made your cheeks flush.

“No, I’m fine, I just got a little surprised.” He chuckled and continued to hold your wrist “Sorry, I didn’t want to disturb you, you looked like you were meditating.”

You tried to pick up the pieces again but he stoped you. “I’ll get it, let’s treat your burn first.” He led you to the bathroom and sat you. on the edge of the tub. Rummaging through the medicine cabinet he found some gauze. You cringed a bit. “Taehyung, it’s not that serious, it’s just a little red that’s all.” Taehyung shook his head. “Better to be safe than sorry. Give me your hand.” You were a bit too happy to have him hold your hand as he ran it under cold water. He was so careful and the way he touched you made you want him to never stop. He dried your hand before wrapping it with gauze, clearly pleased with his work. “There!” He smiled. “Good as new.”

“Thank you.” You laughed and the two of you locked eyes. With him looking at you, you suddenly became hyper aware of his bare chest. He wasn’t super buff but he was lean and toned. He looked very strong and it was hard to look away but you made yourself.

For the next few days, you continued to get up early and make tea, careful not to drop it again.

It was getting really fucking hard for Taehyung to not look at you. It seemed like the only thing you owned were little shorts and huge ass t-shirts. Every time he saw you he wanted to push you against a wall and destroy you. Taehyung had take showers very frequently because of you.

——————————————————————————————————————————

Quarantine was not the most fun and besides meal time, you and Taehyung had not interacted very much. He was very sweet and funny but you were too shy to ask him to hang out.

He must have been going stir crazy too because eventually there was a knock on your door.

“Come in.” You said. Taehyung slowly opened the door. He was wearing sweats and a dark blue sweatshirt. It was annoying that he looked good in even the lumpiest clothes.

“Hey, Im really fucking bored out here can you come watch a movie with me.”

“Sure.” You followed him out to the living room “What movie?” “Im not sure.” He said sitting down. “What do you like to watch?”

You shrugged, to be honest you. Weren’t really a movie person. You. Spent a lot of time listening to music and reading but movies weren’t something you did too often. Being away from your family was making you a bit nostalgic and you recalled movies you watched with them.

“When I was little I really liked Howls Moving Castle.” Taehyung raised an eyebrow at you. “Out of every movie you want to watch a cartoon?” He asked.

“What?!” You giggled. “Howl was like my dream guy when I was younger.” You looked at him as earnestly as you could. “Please can we watch it. I really want to now.” He sighed dramatically but didn’t object.

Once it started you were immediately spellbound. You had forgotten how beautiful Miyazaki movies were. At one point without thinking you said “Howl kind of reminds me of you.” Taehyung looked at you but you were too entranced to notice. His eyes roamed the curves of your face and made their way down your neck, to your shoulder which was bare as your huge shirt slipped off of it. He cleared his throat and returned to watching the movie. There was no way he would let himself think about you. That wasn’t fair to you at all.

Yo had forgotten how sad and intense Miyazaki movies got and you hated when there was conflict in stories. A couple of times you reached out for tae’s arm and he let you. He hated how much he liked the feeling that you needed him there. After your fourth time grabbing onto him, He took your hand and laced his fingers through yours. He watched you register this and look at him. Your eyes were so big and innocent. God, he wanted to ruin you. You smiled at him and continued to watch the rest of the movie. He stopped himself from doing anything stupid. He couldn’t help but be a little disappointed when the film was over and you released his hand. “Thanks for watching with me.” He said. You nodded “Thanks for letting me choose the movie, I forgot how much I loved it.”

There was a silence as he looked at you in the now dark living room. You let him allowing yourself to observe him as well.

“Y/N.” Taehyung’s gaze was filled with a sudden intensity. It scared you a little.

“Yes?” Taehyung pulled you into his arms and buried his head in your hair breathing you in. “I would be so goddamn lonely if you weren’t here.” He said his voice a bit muffled. You were taken aback by his sudden affection that it took you a moment to return it. You gently wrapped your arms around his neck. He smelled so good it was hard for you to think about letting go. Lucky for you Taehyung didn’t. He stayed like that for a long time, so long that you fell asleep and then he fell asleep.

The next morning you woke up still wrapped around each other. He was observing you when you opened your eyes and grinned when he noticed you had woken up.

“Good morning.” You felt a bit awkward that you had ended up in this situation.

“Morning.” You replied avoiding is stare. Taehyung only released you when he was worried you’d be able to feel him. When you finally untangled your limbs from his, he rushed to the shower.

——————————————————————————————————————————

You had started to notice the Tae had become very touchy with you. Not that you were complaining, you loved it. You were definitely starting to develop a crush on him and as much as you hated to admit it you were definitely flirting with him. If you were cooking he would find ways to pass behind you and touch your waist. At the dinner table he began to sit next to you and would knock his knee against yours. He’d even started to put his arm around you when you watched movies which had become a very frequent thing. Regardless of how much you enjoyed his touches you decided not to put too much weight behind it. Tae was like an older brother and in this short time you had been living together, he looked after you. You refused to get his affection confused with attraction.

“Hey, my mom just sent an old picture of her and your mom in college.” Tae called from the living room. You ran out to see jumping on the couch next to him and looking over his shoulder. You immediately recognize your mom which made you miss her a lot. The woman next to her in the picture looked like she had just stepped off a runway, you could see where Tae had gotten his good looks.

“Wow, She’s beautiful you look so much like her.” You said. He leaned back into your lab and looked up at you grinning. “Y/N, are you calling me beautiful?” You choked on the air. “No! Um, er- you are beautiful, but- I wasn’t..” Tae turned towards you and poked your nose. “You’re so cute.” You felt yourself turn completely red.

“Im not cute.” You mumbled, punching him in the shoulder.

“You are ridiculously cute. It’s almost too much.” You found yourself pouting again and you crossed your arms. Reached up and pulled your face towards him. “See? Thats cute. If you keep doing that I’m not going to be able to stop myself from doing bad things to you.”

You found yourself at a loss for words. Tae rand is thumb over your bottom lip before laughing. Anger overwhelmed you. “You’re an asshole!” You shoved him away from you. He continued to laugh “Oh yeah? Am I?” He tickled your side and you shrieked jumping off the couch and running away from him. He chased you around the apartment and when he caught up to you he threw you over his shoulder. “Tae!” You giggled. He threw you onto the couch and plopped down next to you. “Don’t deny who you are.”

“Shut up.”

——————————————————————————————————————————

Tae picked the movie tonight. It was the notebook and apparently he was a huge fan of Rachel McAdams. You didn’t blame him, she was very pretty but you did feel weirdly jealous. You noticed he didn’t put his arm around you like he normally did which kinda disappointed you. You wondered if he was mad at you which made it hard for you relax. You sat with your arms wrapped around your legs. In your head you started to go through everything you had done during the day that could have upset him but you weren’t finding anything he had seemed happy all day which is why it was weird that he wasn’t acting like he usually did. You were about to start crying until you felt him touching your thigh. He looked like he didn’t know he was doing it as he continued to watch the movie.You couldn’t focus at all, his touches felt so good and you closed your eyes accidentally sighing with pleasure. You felt his hand travel closer to the line of your shorts until they ghosted over your core. Taken aback you looked at tae, worried that he was unaware of what he was doing but he was looking right at you now, his eyes full of something dark and wild. He pulled you closer to him and applied more pressure which made you moan more and you leaned your head against his chest. His other hand caressed your head. “You are so pretty.” He mumbled. “You have no idea how much I want to ruin you.” As he rubbed harder you could feel yourself building up to something you bit your lip and felt your hips roll against his hand. “Do you like that?” Taehyung asked

“Mhmn.” Was the most you could say. “Do you want to come?” You nodded but tae wasn’t satisfied. “I asked if you want to come.” He said.

“Yes! I want to come!” You shouted and almost instantly you felt yourself reach the edge. He continued to move his hand against you as you shook. “Oh my god.”You exhaled. Once you came down from your high you couldn’t bare to look at him and kept your head buried in his shirt. He kissed your hair and then your forehead, your eyes cheeks, nose, before making his way to your lips. It was soft and too brief you almost felt like it hadn’t happened. But he didn’t offer anything more. He got off the couch and walked to the bathroom. You heard him start the shower and you fell asleep before he opened the door again.

——————————————————————————————————————————

It had been three days since whatever happened between you two had happened. You weren’t sure what to call it just as much as you weren’t sure what it meant. You were so confused and too afraid to ask him. Tae seemed just as goofy as he always was which was a relief though he didn’t touch you as much. In fact you had tried to hug him earlier and you could swear you saw him flinch. This was infuriating! He was the one who has initiated the whole thing and now he wasn’t even going to acknowledge it. There was no way you were letting him get away with this. If he was going to make you mad then you were going to mess with him.

“Hey Y/N I’m bored come play cards with me.”

You were sitting in your room reading. You smiled to yourself as you ignored his request.

“Y/N?” Again no response. You. Could hear him walking to your room. He stood in the doorway looking at you.

“Y/N, did you hear me?” You put on your most innocent face before looking at him. “No, did you call me?” He scratched his head clearly confused before sighing. “No, never mind.” You stuck your tongue out at him when he walked away.

When he made dinner that night you told him you had already eaten. “When?” He asked. You shrugged, “I had some crackers earlier and I’m full.” You could tell that he was getting frustrated. But he still didn’t ask you what was going on.

You didn’t watch a movie that night but you hadn’t in three days so it wasn’t that weird. When He closed his bedroom door you waited an hour before leaving your room and slipping into his. He was definitely asleep when you got under the covers. He wasn’t wearing a shirt and you were pleased when he moved to wrap his arms around you groaning into you.

——————————————————————————————————————————

In the morning he was not in the room and the door was opened. You got up and found him at the island waiting for you. You liked the way he looked in the morning his har disheveled hid voice incredibly deep.

“Y/N.” He spoke. You shivered at the way he said it. He was angry and it was very hot.

“Tae.” You responded. He shook his head at you and you went on pretending to be oblivious.

“Can you make me pancakes?” You asked sweetly. “‘Im, hungry.” You opened one of the cabinets and got a glass for water. Before you could open the fridge Tae moved grabbed you and pushed you against the counter placing a hand on either side of you.

“Y/N, why are you doing this to me?” Although you were a bit shocked you forced yourself to continue the act. “Doing what Tae, I just asked for pancakes.” Then he actually growled, leaning his head onto your shoulder. You felt blood rush to your core you were so turned on. “Goddamn it, Y/N. I keep convincing myself that this is a bad idea but you keep doing things that make me want to teach you a lesson.”

“Then teach me.” You say. He lifted his head from your shoulder and looked into your eyes. The darkness had returned and his eyes seemed heavy as he looked down at your lips. Suddenly he was devouring you. This kiss was nothing like the ghost one from before. This one felt like he was trying to suck all of the life out of you. And it was working. Your knees went weak and you had to hold onto his shoulders to help yourself stay upright. He slipped his tongue into your mouth and you moaned into him. He tasted so good and just as you felt like he was giving himself to you he pulled away. You whined. “Y/N, tell me what you want.” You rolled your eyes and he gripped your face with his hands. “Tell me what you want.”

“I want you.” He kissed you smiling against your mouth. “Where do you want me?”

“Everywhere.” You moved his hands to your breasts and he quickly lifted up your shirt to reveal your breasts.

“Holy fuck I can’t believe you slept next to me like this.” He moved his mouth down your neck before latching onto you nipple and sucking hard.

“Oh my god.” You ran your fingers though his hair. Tae slipped his fingers down to the waistline of your shorts and you let him pull them down along with your underwear. “Such a pretty little cunt.” He said before slapping it making you gasp. He turned you around and licked your folds your eyes rolling back. He began to suck on your clit and you lost it. “Fuck, oh my god! Yes!” Without warning tae pushed you to the ground and stood up you could see the bulge that had formed in his sweats. He placed your hand over it and rolled his head back while you massaged it. Then he pulled down his sweats to reveal a very large very erect cock. You swallowed and looked up at him. ‘Fuck, Y/N you have no idea how pure you look. I can’t wait to fucking ruin you.” Grabbing onto your hair he pushed his dick into your mouth. “Good girl.” He said gently. Tae watched as you tried not to choke on him. “You're doing so good.” He began to buck his hips into you and you gagged on him getting saliva all over his length. When you almost couldn’t take it he pulled out and picked you up placing you on the counter.

“Are you ready for me baby?” He asked and you nodded. He didn’t move. “I need an answer.”

“Yes, Please fuck me.” You beg. And then the pushed into you stretching you out so much you stoped breathing for a second. But as he pulled out you immediately wanted him back inside. Tae grabbed your neck. “I want you to look at me when I’m fucking you.” He pounded into you and when he thrusted at just the right angle your eyes started to water but you kept looking at him. “You feel so fucking good, Y/N. I’ve thought about this so much and you are even tighter than I expected.” The lack of oxygen was heightening your pleasure and you started to feel your orgasm coming on. “Im going to come!” You screamed. He pounded into you harder. “Not yet baby, Not until I say so.” You bit your lip in an effort to hold it back but your vision blurred and there was no stopping it. Tae kept thrusting as you rode it out and as you squeezed around him he reached his climax. He pulled out and his juices poured out of you. He wrapped his arms around you and hugged you for a long time. After some time he picked you up and carried you to the bathroom. He turned on the shower and pulled you inside. As the water ran he took your face in his hards and kissed you softly. He kissed your shoulders and your breasts. He knelt kissing your stomach, thighs, knees and feet. You grabbed his face and pulled him back up into your lips. He felt safe and secure. You let him wash your body and he let you wash his. Finally he stepped out of the shower and dried off before opening the bathroom door.

“Where are you going?” You asked him.

“To make you pancakes.”

677 notes · View notes

todoroki-waifu · 3 years

Note

ayoo! I saw that requests were open so here I am! Anyways can I requests that there's a fem reader that is best friends with todoroki and he's dating (anyone) and one day when class 1a is chilling in the living room having a movie night and a kid from the future time travel there and everyone is confused asf and sooner or later it comes out that the child was todoroki's and the readers child and everyone's like damn cuz yk he has a whole s/o next to him LMFAOSJJ IM SO SORRY THIS IS SO CONFUSUNG😭😭

I’m so sorry this is so late! 😢 Thank you so much for your request! And it wasn’t confusing. This was an interesting one. If I did misinterpret it wrong, I’m sorry! Lol hope you like it ^^

Note: __(u/s) will stand for unknown/unnamed significant other for Todoroki.

Todoroki x F! Reader (kind of?)

Word Count: 1,987

Genre: Angst, slight fluff, sci-fi, maybe a little fantasy? (whatever time travel would fall under)

Warnings: Female reader and Todoroki with a gender neutral s/o.

----------------

Midoriya, Iida, Todoroki, __(u/s), and Jirou were preparing snacks for class 1a's weekly movie night. Iida, Midoriya, and Jirou were the first to leave the kitchen, bringing with them cups, beverages, napkins, straws, and disposable plates. While Todoroki finishes up placing a variety of chips into different bowls, he looks over at his __(u/s).

He smiles fondly at them, walking over to his partner and wrapping his arms around them.

"Need any help?"

"T-todoroki-kun! You scared me." __(u/s) was concentrated on microwaving the popcorn at the correct temperature, afraid of triggering the fire alarm.

"Really? Am I that frightening?" He pouts slightly.

"Not at all! I guess my mind was elsewhere. I wanted to make sure that I didn't burn the popcorn." __(u/s) laughed sheepishly before pecking his cheek.

Both heads turn towards the kitchen entrance when they hear the sound of steps entering.

"Relax! Just me." You saw their slightly stiffened look. They were a fairly new couple so they were still getting used to showing their affection in front of other people. Todoroki and his partner were only comfortable around you, being that you're his best friend.

You've known him for a while and have been there for almost an entirety of his childhood and up to now. He still has yet to tell his significant other about his past, the poor boy afraid of scaring his current lover.

Well, he'll tell them some day. Just not right now. But that was how much Todoroki trusted you.

He was also so grateful that __(u/s) was comfortable around you. __(u/s) knew of his and your relationship and although they were a bit weary of you in the beginning, they ended up loving you later on. You proved that you retained no feelings for the half and half student and that you had the same intentions as the rest of class 1a. Which was to be his loyal and supportive friend.

"Didn't mean to interrupt. Mina and Toru wanted some ice cream." You quickly went to the freezing, grabbing two tubs of the frozen dessert along with two huge spoons.

"Don't take too long, bestie. I want to get some cuddles with __(u/s), too." You joked as you walked out to the common area.

------

Midoriya saw you approaching the group and was the first to assist you.

"Here, let me get that." He grabs the two cold containers, placing it on the table. "Who wants which flavors?"

He calls out to the gang while a few responded back and you helped the All Might fanatic. Once you finish passing out the bowls, Todoroki and his partner come out with a few salty snacks to add to the menu.

You sat in between Midoriya and __(u/s) on the floor with a plate full of assorted goods. Todoroki and __(u/s) share a bowl of chips and ice cream, the couple feeding each other occasionally. You smile at your best friend, so happy for him.

Although you were a bit jealous that he found love before you. You felt like a third wheel whenever both of them would ask you to hang out.

Oh well. Romance will come whenever the time is right. Besides, you weren't that focused on relationships nor did you really have anyone in particular that you liked.

Your thoughts refocused on the blaring music coming from the TV, indicating the start of the movie. You excused yourself after a while, heading to the kitchen to grab some more water bottles for yourself and for a few.

When you reach the kitchen door, a small swirl of blue energy blocks your way. You watch as the ball of energy expand and white electrifying rays spread from the center. Before you could react, the energized orb immediately explodes, the blast causing you to fall onto your bottom. Not only did you feel the force push you back, but you felt a sudden weight holding you down.

"__(y/n)! Are you okay?" Midoriya and Bakugou are the first to respond to the blast with Todoroki not too far behind them.

"Y-yeah, I think so?" You replied, carefully sitting up. You look down at the weight on your lap, noticing it to be a small child with ___(hair color) hair and a single streak of white and red. When they peer up, you see dark grey and light blue eyes staring back at you.

"Mommy?" The child blinked up at you then smiled brightly. "Mommy! I found you!"

"M-m-mommy!?" You screeched out, feeling the little one embrace you tightly.

"You're a mother?" Uraraka chimed in.

"I didn't know I was one!"

"Mommy, where did your big belly go? Did my little sister finally come out? Where is she? I want to meet her! I'm so excited to be a big sister!"

"Excuse me!? Little sister?"

"You had another baby?" Hagakure gasps loudly.

"How? I never got pregnant! I don't even have a boyfriend nor am I seeing anyone!" You answered her back then sighed loudly. "H-hey kid, ummm, first off, are you okay?" You wanted to make sure this tiny stranger wasn't injured.

"Yes, mommy! I'm okay."

"Alright, well, I hate to tell you this but I'm not your mom. But maybe I can find her for you?"

"What do you mean? Why do you say that? Of course you're my mom!" Her eyes begin to fill with tears.

"It's just kind of impossible. Listen, you said that I had a big belly and you were waiting for your little sister, but right now, I don't have that big belly. I didn't even know you were having a sibling."

"M-mommy, are you-you j-joking? It's not funny! Waah!" Your future daughter begins to cry loudly and you immediately hug her.

"Don't cry! Everything will be alright! We're going to find your mommy, okay?" You look around the room to your classmates, sending them a pleading look.

"Hey man, that's your brat." Bakugou stuffs his hands into his pocket, about to not involve himself in your little dilemma. He didn't have patience for children at the moment.

"Bakugou!" You scolded him. "She's not a brat. She's just lost and scared. Take it easy on her. And if you want to be a hero, help me find the kid's parents. Isn't that what a hero is supposed to do?"

"I ain't no babysitter!"

"Dude, that's not manly at all! Let's help them out." Kirishima places a hand on his blonde friend's shoulder.

"Time travel!" Midoriya blurts out of nowhere. Once he receives his classmates' confused gazes, he finally begins to clarify. "I think she's really your daughter, __(y/n). She looks a lot like you and she seems really attached to you. She must've came here from the future when that blast happened. That's the only plausible explanation."

"I'm sorry that everything is confusing and scary right now, but I think I figured out what's going on." Midoriya squats beside you and your daughter, placing his hand on her back. Your daughter sniffles a couple times before looking at the green haired boy.

"Uncle Deku? How... how come you're so small?" She wipes her eyes while he could hear a few snickering in the background.

"Yes, well, I'm sure you're noticing that everyone is different. It's because-"

"Daddy!" Your daughter gasps loudly when she finally sees Todoroki. She jumps out from your arms and rushes to the dual quirk user, holding her tiny arms up to him. Todoroki blinks at the child, unsure of what to do.

"Huh? How come you're not holding mommy's hand?" She notices Todoroki's fingers linked with __(u/s).

"D-daddy?! You mean, Todoroki-kun is the father?" Midoriya shrieks at the reveal.

"W-what?" __(u/s) frowns deeply, slowly slipping their hand away from Todoroki. "You mean, you and __(y/n)? But I thought that... "

"Wait, no, that is impossible. She must have me mistaken for someone else. __(y/n) and I do not harbor any feelings for one another nor do we share any children together. Please believe me." Todoroki attempts to grab __(u/s)'s hands, but they back away quickly.

"Yeah! Shouto's right! We're only best friends. That's it. You know that. How can we have a kid together when we're not even a couple? He likes you; not me. I might be single, but I'm really not interested in anyone at the moment."

"Daddy, what is going on? I thought you love mommy?" Your poor daughter was unknowingly exacerbating the situation.

"I... I gotta go." __(u/s) starts to gather their things.

"Please, wait." Todoroki grabs their arm but they pull back suddenly.

"Don't, Todoroki. This is too much. I don't think I can continue this." He tries to plead with them to stay, but __(u/s) shakes their head. "Just, please leave me alone. And please don't contact me. Either of you." ___(u/s) eyes both you and Todoroki.

Your best friend watches sadly as __(u/s) leaves, the room being weighed down by the silent tension. It was only when Denki utters a word that brought back the noise.

"Damn... " The electric hero feels a sudden, sharp jab to his right side. He looks at the source to find Jirou glaring at him.

"Mommy? Daddy?" The little one blinks at Todoroki and then at you, uncertain of what just transpired. You knew your best friend needed space to himself for now so you decide that you would approach him later. Besides, you felt like you were responsible for his breakup. You felt too embarrassed to face him.

So instead, you focus on your little girl, gently grabbing her hand and pulling her to the side. Midoriya begins to explain to your daughter why things were so different and she slowly begins to understand.

-------

Todoroki walks outside of the dorm building, situating himself on the first few steps. His mind tortures him by replaying the scene where his relationship crumbles. He doesn't understand. What could he have done to preserve his romance with ___(u/s)?

But then his mind directs him to his future daughter. Todoroki was a bit angry, yes, but he couldn't blame the young child seeing that she came from a very different timeline. It honestly wasn't her fault.

Then who's fault was it? His? Yours?

No, it was no one's. If he was truly meant to be with you, why wasn't he jumping for joy? Because at this point in time, he was simply not attracted to you. He honestly didn't understand how you two formed a family together.

Then his mind wanders elsewhere.

Would being around you continue to ruin his future relationships? Would he truly be happy if you ended up being his lifetime partner? According to his future child, you two were going to have another one so that had to mean something.

But he didn't love you.

Yes, he cared deeply for you and you both knew everything and anything about each other, but you and him had a different kind of bond.

Then the thought of sacrificing his friendship with you for the sake of his future relationships began to hurt his heart. But you'd understand, right? Todoroki wanted to find love eventually. He also did want to work everything out with __(u/s).

But would separating himself from you be the right answer? How would that affect the future? He felt so torn. He has a family with you in the future, but his heart does not yearn for you. And you don't love him back like that either.

Right?

As he thinks on his feelings for you, he goes back to when you two were children and when you first met. He remembers almost everything that you two shared together all the way up to the present.

The arguments. The late night study sessions. The dangerous villain encounters. The hero internships. The cultural festival. The laughter.

Your warmth. Your kindness. Your smile.

His heart slowly starts to beat faster.

But he didn't love you, right?

38 notes · View notes

jayjaydawn · 4 years

Text

hide-n-seek

Summary: Where the members find out about your secret relationship

Pairing: Soonyoung/Hoshi x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: Language, implied smut

Words: 1.5k

A/N: Sorry for the typos, I hope you like this regardless.

“There are no secrets that time does not reveal.”

Soonyoung and you were sitting on your couch, your leg stretched out on his lap, him scrolling through his phone. The tv was on, you were focused on watching the k-drama, the main leads were just about to kiss when- “Ya! ____, Why aren’t you picking up your calls? Your mother is worried, she’s messaging me” Soonyoung says as he pushes my arm.

“Hossshhhh, you made me miss out on the most crucial scene ever, I can't even rewind it because it's on tv!” “If you’ve missed it anyway, might as well call your mom and let her know you’re alive.”

“Ughh! Fine, I'm calling her. I left my phone in my room.” you said as you forced yourself out of your comfortable position. As soon as you stood up, you felt soonyoung smack your ass, making you turn around and glare at him as you walked away. You could hear him snickering as you left.

At the same time, Soonyoung received a call from Seokmin.

“Hello” “Hyung, where are you? When will you be back at the dorm, we’re ordering food, what should we order for you?” “Uhhmmm, i’ll let you know in 5 mins? I don’t really know when i’ll get back” he said and looked up as he saw you coming back from your room, phone in your hand. You gesture at him, ‘who is it?’ “Okay hyung, call me back as soon as possible, the restaurant doesn’t take orders past 10pm” “Yuppp, bye seokmin”

“Ooooh why did he call? Did something happen?” you ask him as you try to make yourself comfortable again on the couch.

“Nothing, he was asking when i’ll be back, they’re ordering take out”

“Oh, I think you should get back tonight, you haven't been back on time this past week, they might get suspicious”

“Hmm, i’ll text him and let him know i’ll reach in a bit”

"Cool" you replied and looked back at the tv as he texted Seokmin to let him know he'd be reaching in sometime.

Hoshi and you had been in a 'secret' relationship for the past two years. It wasn't that much of a secret really, both of your families knew about your relationship and you all had interacted on many occasions. Often his mother would contact you and the same goes for him. But due to personal reasons, you both decided to keep it a secret from his team members. One of the reasons being management, they didn't really approve of your relationship and when they figured it was quite serious, they made sure we kept it as private and secret as possible. Also between the two of us, we liked the thrill that came with the hide-n-seek.

"Okay ___, I'm leaving, my phone is blowing up with messages" Soonyoung brought me out of my thoughts, as he gently pushed my legs off of his lap.

You cutely put your hands out towards him and made grabby hands at him. He chuckled as he leaned down to hug you and kissed you deeply. "Mmm, okay now you really need to go before I don't let you" you said as you pulled away. He laughed and you both finally said bye, for real this time and he left.

°°°

Soonyoung made it back to the dorm in record time.

"He's finally here" Chan announces from the table when he notices Soonyoung is back.

"Sorry, I'm a little late." He said as he sat in his spot on the table. The rest of the members came in and began eating.

"Okay so we'll be starting practice a little late tomorrow so it'll probably end a little late too. Just warning you guys." Seungcheol said casually while eating.

Everyone acknowledged what he said and went back to eating. Soonyoung finished his dinner and got up to leave when Joshua asked him, “Hey hoshi, can I borrow your phone for a minute. I’ll give it back to you in your room.” “Okay” he says as he hands him the phone and leaves.

Joshua’s phone camera had stopped working this morning. He needed to send himself some photos of documents he had. He took hoshi’s phone and opened his gallery to send himself the photos when he came across something that surprised him. There were pictures of him with a girl that he didn’t know. As he was staring at it, trying to recall if he had ever seen her, he felt someone leaning over his shoulder looking into the same screen he was. “Who is that with hyung? She’s so pretty.” Hearing Seungkwan say this, Seokmin and Mingyu rushed towards Joshua to get a glance too. Joshua hurriedly turned off the phone and stood up, “Don’t mention this in front of Soonyoung. You know him, he might get mad. I’m going to return the phone to him, I don’t want a single word coming out of your mouths. Understand?”

The younger ones nodded their heads and looked at each other excitedly. Joshua headed back to his room and returned the phone to hoshi on the way.

°°°

“Okayy guys, let’s take a water break.” Soonyoung announced to the rest of the group. They all stopped, panting and making their way towards their water bottles. Soonyoung sat down as he downed his bottle when he heard his phone ringing.

____ Calling..

____ never calls in the middle of practice. He had made sure to tell her he wouldn’t be coming over today due to practice. Worried, he picked up his phone and rushed out of the studio to answer the call.

He heard your sleepy voice on the other line asking, “Why aren’t you here yet? I’ve been waiting.” “Baby, I told you I wouldn’t be able to make it today. Have you not slept yet?” “Oh yah. I completely forgot. I fell asleep watching Tv and woke up suddenly and I guess I just felt sort of disoriented. Sorry to disturb you.” “It’s okay, go to sleep, I’ll see you tomorrow.” “Byeee”

He hung up the phone and went back into the studio. The rest of the members were sitting and seemed to be in a deep conversation with each other.

“What’s going on here?”

“Oh nothing, just discussing that pretty girl whose pictures you had on your phone.”

“SEUNGKWAN! WHAT THE HELL!” Seokmin yelled as he smacked him on the back of his head. Seungkwan’s eyes grew big as he realised what he had said aloud.

“OH NO! FORGET WHAT I SAID.” Everyone sighed and looked at Hoshi, expecting him to blow up.

“Let’s get back to work now.” Soonyoung said gently and everyone hurried back to their positions, slightly surprised that he didn’t react they way they had expected.

°°°

“Hello baby, what’s up?” You answered the phone. “___ why don’t you come over to the dorm today. The members have all gone out to do their own stuff.” “Oh really? It’s been a while since I’ve been over. Okay, I’ll see you in a bit. Byee” You hung up the phone and got ready to leave.

°°°

You were lying on Soonyoung’s chest as he played with your hair. You looked up at him and rested your chin on him as you asked, “Are you hungry? I’m starving. Let’s order some food?”

“Sure” As soon as he said that you turned to the other side and put on his T-shirt. You got up and rushed out to call the restaurant as he followed while simultaneously pulling on his boxers.

Once, takeout arrived, you both started gobbling up the food. “Sex really does make you hungry ___” Soonyoung laughs. “Shut up will you? When are the members coming back? I’ll have to leave before that”

“They texted me and said they’ll take longer.” He said and picked you up, making you straddle him. You looked at each other and slowly kissed. The kiss soon turned hungrier and sloppy when you heard a bunch of footsteps walking towards you both.

You suddenly stopped, shocked and tried to get off his lap as fast as you could. Soonyoung’s grip grew tighter as he forced you to stop moving.

You turned and looked at all the members staring at you absolutely gobsmacked.

“What the fuck did I just see?”Minghao says.

“Aren’t you the girl who we saw on his phone. OH MY GOD ARE YOU GUYS SEEING THIS??” Seungkwan screamed.

“Okay, I guess it's finally time to çome out and just say it. Im sorry ___ I didn’t tell you first before taking this decision” He put you aside and stood up, pulling you towards him by the waist.

“Guys meet ___, ___ meet the guys. We’ve been dating for two years and that’s it”

The guys and you looked at each other with eyes wider than the sun.

“Uhmm Hi” You gave them the most awkward wave.

“Hi- Sorry for interruping your- uhh whatever that you-- uh- were doing” Dino said

“Okay, we are done for today, let’s talk about this over dinner. Shoo Shoo.” Jeonghan said and everyone moved away, whispering to each other.

Soonyoung and you looked at each other, “Playtimes over I guess” you giggle as you peck his lips and move to finish your dinner and get to know his friends for the first time.

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bakubitch-minusultra · 3 years

Text

Not Alone: Chapter Nine

-> an apocalyptic series with bnha characters but without quirks because im the writer and i can do whatever the fuck i want :P bruh its 3:45 in the morning and i have a softball game in six hours but fuck sleep right? This is the l o n g e s t chapter ive written and it took hours i was writing it while listening to true crime podcasts lol new characters unlocked

-> Word Count: 6.9k haha n i c e

-> Warnings: pervy doods, blood, sexual assault, violence, guns

-> Taglist: @5sosfckss @laudthingcat [if u wanna be added lmk <3]

The sunlight coming in the window blinded Y/n as she woke up disoriented. She shivered from the cold breeze that came from down the hall. She noticed she was lying on Kirishima still and smiled, thinking about the night before. But stopped when she noticed that his shirt was soaked in cold sweat.

Tears streamed down her cheeks, “No. No.” She pushed him and his body compressed against her push, but he didn’t stir.

“Y/n what is it?” Mina came running in the room.

Kirishima sputtered and snorted. He rolled over knocking Y/n off and onto the floor. She started to laugh, “He’s alive. I thought… He’s cold. Oh my god he’s alive. His fever broke. He’s going to live.” Y/n jumped up and grabbed the next vial of medication.

Mina rushed to his side and felt his face, “Oh fuck, I was scared. I thought for sure he was gone.” Mina hugged her when she came back. Mina smelt like Hades and Y/n smirked. They had traded sleeping partners for the night.

Y/n hugged her back, but noticed the difference in their bodies. Mina was melded into Y/n, squeezing her where as Y/n was rigid.

They gave him his next shot and pulled the bandages off his leg. The red lines had receded but the wound still looked red and angry. She knew they weren’t out of the danger zone, but she felt good knowing that they were one step closer.

He slept the entire day and Mina and Y/n hung out. They took turns keeping watch and playing with Hades. Y/n could see Hades’s affinity towards Mina getting stronger. She knew that even she felt different. She was getting closer to Mina and Kirishima.

“Y/n what’s for dinner?”

Y/n shrugged down at Mina from the window of the barn, “I can go kill a bird.”

Mina nodded, “Alright. I’ll start the fire.”

They sealed up the house completely and decided to cook in the bunker. It was gross and sweaty with a fire down there, but it made perfect sense. No smell escaped out into the wind.

She climbed down with her bow and quiver and headed across the grass. She slipped into the forest, but instead of finding a tree to climb she froze. She smelled them before she could see or hear them. She slid against the tree and waited to figure out where the smell was coming from.

“It was rude of you to leave without the escort we offered.”

Y/n turned to the voice but something smacked her in the forehead and everything went black.

Xxxx

“Wake up.” Pain overwhelmed her as she opened one of her eyes. She saw bars in front of her face. “Please wake up.”

In the muted firelight she could see a girl poking her with a stick. It made a small cut on her arm, but that wasn’t where the pain was coming from. She closed her eyes tightly and then opened them again. It was dark, the firelight licked across the dark metal bars of her cage. She turned to the girl.

“Where are we?”

“The others have us.” The girl said. Y/n’s stomach fell into her bowels. Her heartbeat and breath quickened. She pushed the door to the cage with her foot. Her boots were gone.

“Where are we specifically?”

The girl frowned at Y/n, “What?”

“Our location.”

The girl shrugged. She was skinny and filthy. She made Y/n think about Mina, which made her panic. She wondered if they knew where Mina and Kirishima were. She saw her bow and quiver leaning against the tree near her.

“There she is.”

Y/n looked up at the filthy scumbag who had chased her into town. He was grinning again. He seemed very proud of himself. “You’re a pretty girl. What’s your name? I bet it’s something pretty like Jessica or Stephanie or Grace.” Y/n licked her lips and put a finger to the source of her pain. He winced as she touched the red sticky spot. “Sorry ‘bout that. I had to surprise you. Bet it hurts doesn’t it.” He kneeled on the ground in front of her cage. “Wanna tell me about how you got outta town?”

Y/n gulped.

He rattled the cage suddenly and started laughing at her horrified expression. “Jesus you aren’t mute are you? I like it when you girls scream.” He pointed to the girl next to Y/n. “I guess we can make her scream for you.”

The girl shied away from the bars and curled into a small ball. Y/n wanted him dead. Right now.

He pointed at Y/n again, “You’re going to fetch us a good price. I know it.”

Fear rocked Y/n. She didn’t have a plan. That was one of her rules. Her plans where capture was a possibility had never included a cage. She always thought the girls were grabbed and dragged to trucks.

He walked back to the fire and howled into the night air. She watched as he unzipped his pants and peed on the fire.

“Jesus Christ that’s disgusting you fucker.” The hot steam rose from the fire, polluting the air around it. A large group of men started to bitch and complain. Y/n looked at the girl who had a disgusted look on her face.

“I don’t know about you but I don’t want that inside me.” Y/n gasped at her language. The girl grinned at her, “Names Jirou.”

“I’m Y/n.” Y/n looked around for Mina and Kirishima but she didn’t see them anywhere. “How old are you, Jirou?” She asked softly.

Jirou spat on the ground outside of her bars, “Sixteen.” She was malnourished. She would be made to work the farms. She wouldn’t be a breeder.

Y/n wouldn’t let either of them end up that way. She saw a small silver thing on the ground and looked at Jirou.

“Poke that stick this way again.”

She slipped her skinny arm through the bars and passed it to Y/n. Y/n looked back at the men. They were getting drunk and the fire was starting to dim. She flicked at the silver thing and dragged it back to her with several small movements. It was an old rusty nail with a silver tip. She reached her fingers through the bars and grabbed it.

“How old are you?” Jirou asked, watching the men.

“Nineteen.”

“You look older.”

Y/n wanted to frown at her, but the nail in her hands felt too amazing to bother. She passed Jirou the nail, “Pick your lock.”

She eyed it smiling, “Wow you’re good.” She reached her hands through the bars. Jirou made funny faces and then Y/n heard the clunk of the lock. She picked the lock faster than Y/n did. Y/n had only ever picked a couple.

She nodded, “Mom says we have to do whatever it takes to not be a breeder. I will die before I go there.” Her words reminded Y/n of the girl in the back of the truck who screamed. She felt sick. She was even more determined to save Jirou. The rusty nail clanked in the lock. “Want me to do it?”

Y/n gave her a look, “They’ll notice your tiny arm slipping through to my cage.” She fumbled with it again. “Dipshit is coming back.” She pulled her arm in and sat on the nail.

He grinned at Y/n, “I think I wanna taste the merchandise before I give it away.” He pulled a key out of his pants and licked his lips. He got down on the ground in front of her cage and stuck the key in. “You’re gonna like this.”

Y/n felt like throwing up.

He opened the door and reached in lightning fast. His huge hand grabbed her thin wrist and clamped down. He dragged her from the cage. She kicked at him but he was too strong. He pinned her to the ground on her stomach and pulled her hair, whispering into her ear, “Scream and I slit your throat.” He let go of her hair with force and shoved her face into the pine needles and dirt. Y/n coughed and choked. Her eyes flickered at Jirou.

“Don’t do this in front of her,” Y/n begged.

He shoved her face in the pine needles again, “She needs educating. Where you two are going, you’ll both be needing to know how to make a man happy. Think of me as your teacher.”

Y/n felt him grind himself against her and threw up. She couldn’t stop herself. She didn;t have anything in her stomach but bile filled her mouth. She spat it to the side of her face, scared that he would rub her face in it.

He pulled her pants down and she felt his hands on her underwear. She wanted to scream and fight but her hands were pinned. If she screamed, he’d kill her. She made the snap decision that death would be better than this and opened her mouth to scream, only to feel him put all his weight on her.

“Shhh Y/n. Don’t scream. We need to go now. Before they find him.”

Tears sprung from her eyes as she looked back and saw his open eyes still staring at her. The rusty nail stuck out only a little bit from his head, next to his eye. Blood trickled down his face.

Jirou heaved him off of Y/n quietly. The fire was only twenty feet from them and she could see that the group of men had dwindled. They must have gone to sleep. Y/n pushed herself up and grabbed her pants. She saw her knife in his boot and took it, holding it tightly. She wanted to stab him so bad.

Jirou grabbed her hand and pointed to the woods.

They walk hunched over. Y/n grabbed her boy and quiver and followed Jirou into the forest. They ran fast, even though they were barefoot. She recognized the forest after a few moments. Even in the dark she knew where they were.

“Oh shit.”

Y/n stopped after hearing Jirou speak. She was preparing for the worst but instead it was the best. She saw yellow eyes glowing in the dark. She quickly dropped to her knees, ignoring the branches that cut her skin. His paws were around her neck within seconds. His warm breath was in her hair. She started to cry and Hades held her like a mother would a child, and she elt soothed.

“He’s yours?”

Y/n nodded through the tears, “Hades.”

“He’s a big dog.”

Y/n smiled, “He’s a wolf. A tundra wolf.”

“Well we better get moving before they find us.”

Y/n stood and ran toward the farmhouse. She knew it was through the woods and not far. They could hide there until the men were gone. Her brain couldn’t seem to make her own survival important. She needed to know if Kirishima and Mina were safe. Jirou ran as fast as Y/n did. Her footsteps were a whisper in the grass beside Y/n. Y/n burted through the door. The house was dark and silent.

“Mina? Kirishima?” The living room was empty. The blankets were gone. She didn’t know where to go. She didn’t know where Mina and Kirishima would have gone. She ran down the basement steps into the bunker. Nothing was there. She ran back up the stairs, “We need to go hide. They’re gone. They might be looking for me.”

“Who?”

“My friends.” The words felt funny in her mouth.

Y/n grabbed Jirou’s sweaty fingers in the dark and pulled her back out to the barn. They slipped inside the dark of the barn. She dropped to her knees in the hay and felt for the hatch. It had hay glued on top of it. It was impossible to find even in the bright of day. She only found it because it was open when she arrived.

“Hurry climb down here.”

Hades jumped down into the whole like he had before many times. Jirou felt for Y/n in the dark and then the hatch. Y/n climbed down after her and pulled the huge hatch back over the hole.

Y/n felt around in the silence for a stool. She sat and suddenly the pain in her feet was overwhelming. She knew they had been cut.

“Did your feet get cut?”

Jirou was closer than Y/n thought, she whispered right in Y/n’s face, “No. My mom made us walk and run in the woods barefoot all the time. They always take the shoes.”

“Smart.”

“Yeah mom was a warden at a maximum security prison before. She says she knows all the worst things people can do and she knows why they do it.”

Y/n shivered at the thought.

They don’t hear voices or any noises. Eventually Y/n fell asleep on the wooden floor against the warm fur of Hades. Jirou slept against her. Y/n’s feet pounded too hard for her to get a good nights sleep.

Xxxx

“It’s been five days Y/n. He walks to the same spot and makes weird noises. I have a hunting hound. He does the same thing when he wants me to follow him. We need to get following him in the woods.” Jirou had not stopped talking for five days. Mom this and Mom that. Y/n didn’t know what to do to make her quiet. She didn’t take Y/n’s silence as a hint. “Yup that wolf is trying to tell us the way to go to find them. Are your feet better?”

Y/n looked at the cuts on the bottom and nodded, “They have scabs.” She rubbed salve into the bottoms of her feet and pull her socks over the scabs. She pulled on the boots she had stored in the farmhouse bunker ages ago.

Jirou threw a huge bone for Hades. He ran to get it and chewed it in the field, “Not so sharp is he? My hound brings it back.”

Y/n looked at the bone and grimaced, “Is that a human bone?”

Jirou shrugged, “Does it matter?”

Hades picked up the long thin bone and walked toward the same spot in the field like he had for the past five days and whined.

“Okay let’s follow him then.” Y/n slung on her backpack and looked back at the farmhouse. She had left a note in the bunker under the barn. Mina knew it was her favorite hiding place. Y/n’s heart hurt and she decided to not look behind her. She didn;t run through the field. Hades trotted along like a real dog. He didn’t wait at the meeting tree.

Nothing was the same.

She opened the cabin door and suddenly her life felt lost. She knew she would regret opening that stupid door and helping Mina. But she never imagined her regret would be being separated from them.

Her heart hurt when she thought about the kisses she shared with Kirishima. Her stomach hurt when she thought about Mina being taken.

Hades picked up the pace as they entered the woods.She reached out and brushed her fingers along the meeting tree. Instead of going the way home to the cabin he cut a hard left and they climbed a different hill.

“So then when I was twelve she says she wants to try to go to the city. So we get all dressed up and I mean bathed and spiffy. We walk all the way to the city but they don’t just let us in. We have to go through a bunch of tests and other nonsense. The city was brand new. It looked like nothing I’ve ever seen. Anyway they come to us in the bright white clothes and make me take all my brand new clean clothes off. They burned them. Mom was mad then. My aunt failed the diabetes test they gave us and so if we wanted to go into the city we would have to leave her behind. No diabetes in the city. Mom said they could shove that up their asses. So we left the city. My other aunt got grabbed there. Mom thinks it was because she tested healthy they told the bad ones to take her to the breeder farms. They drove up in their trucks and held guns on us. They dragged her into the truck. She screamed and reached for us. Mom never moved. She just watched. I never saw my aunt again.” Her story was the story of thousands of women.

“I’ve seen them taken too. They always leave the kids behind.”

Jirou put a finger to her lips, “Shh you hear that?”

Y/n listened. All she heard was her own heartbeat and it dawned on her that as Jirou chatted on, she listened to the forest the way Y/n does. Y/n doesn’t hear them. No birds, no squirrels. She stopped walking. She pulled an arrow instantly and held the bow ready.

A branch broke to the side of them. She swung the bow with the arrow trembling in her hands. A huge black bear groaned and walked past them to the ridge below them. Hades growled and crouched. He looked at Y/n but she shook her head.

They didn’t turn their backs on it. They walked up the hill backwards until the bear was far enough away. Hades’s dark hackles stayed up until he started sniffing the ground again. He wandered in a circle for a bit.

“So then I was saying to Mom… hey look I think he has a smell. Not totally useless is he?”

Y/n glared at her.

Jirou put her hands up, “What? He’s no hound but I think he’s got the scent.”

They followed him through the thick woods until he suddenly stopped waking. They hiked for hours and that was the most animated she had seen him. He growled in his low town and crawled along the forest floor on his belly. They follow him low to the ground. Y/n was scanning the forest but she saw nothing.

“There.” Jirou pointed to a man wearing camouflage high up in a tree. He held a sniper rifle. There was no way they wouldn’t get around him. She pulled her bow out but Jirou stopped her hand and pointed to a man in another tree just behind him.

“We wait for dark,” Jirou whispered.

Y/n looked at Jirou and frowned, “Where’s your home?”

Her brown eyes look haunted. “It’s back closer to the town by the big river. Mom was taken when they were looking for some girl. They searched all the houses and found my aunt and mom hiding. They didn’t find me. I snuck out the back and over the pointy log wall. The others snatched me outside the gates. The hunters were long gone though, so they were gonna wait for them to come back.”

“It was me,” the words slipped from Y/n’s mouth. Jirou crouched in some larger bush and sat, waiting for nightfall. Y/n spoke after a while. She felt awkward in Jirou’s silence. She was never silent. “I can help you find your mom.”

“She never got taken.”

“Where’d she go?”

“Knowing mom she went to hell. She was a mean and spiteful woman. Full of piss is what my aunt said.”

It hit Y/n like a club to the face, “She died?”

Jirou glanced at her, “I told you what she always said. You do whatever it takes to not go there. They woulda put her in the fields anyway. Her insides were injured having me. She couldn’t have more kids.”

Y/n wanted to cry. Jirou had a mother. She had someone. Y/n felt like it was her fault somehow.

“I’m really sorry Jirou. Do you have anywhere you can go? Do you have other people?”

Jirou shook her head, “Nope. It was me, mom and my aunt.”

Y/n decided she wouldn’t ever leave her. No matter what she wouldn’t leave her.

The day faded to night slowly. Spring was further along and the days were longer. The cool air was still fresh and crisp but the sun was getting warmer.

Hades slept again Y/n and Jirou whittled a small piece of wood. She passed the finished product to Y/n. She didn’t know what it was.

“It’s a rook.”

Y/n raised an eyebrow.

“For chess,” she said it like Y/n was an idiot.

“The game?”

Jirou nodded and smiled, “I’m making the pieces for a board. I guess I have to start over. Mine were in our village.”

Y/n looked confused, “You have a village?”

Jirou shook her head, “Nope. Had. The others came last month and burned it to the ground.”

“Life’s hard, Jirou. I’m convinced the god that everyone talked about before, hates us.”

Jirou’s eyes hardened and she pulled her dark blue hair back from her face, “Don’t ever say that. No matter what we have to believe that he’s going to help us. The evil is us.”

Hades jumped but it was too late. As she heard the branch snap behind her she saw a blak hood go over Jirou’s face. Y/n jumped but the guns were on her.

“What’ve got here?” The man standing before Y/n was grinning. He held a rifle to her face.

Hades was ready to attack but Y/n put her hand out, “No Hades. No.” He looked at her face confused. She could see it in her eyes. She shook her head and then looked at the man. “We’ll walk with you but you can’t put that over my head. If he can’t see my eyes he’s going to lose it and kill at least one of you.”

He nodded, “You walk with the wolf. I’ll kill him if I have to.” He removed the hood from Jirou who looked at Hades. Y/n gave her a sharp look. She knew the desperation on Jirou’s face was trying to over take, Y/n felt the same way. But they couldn’t win the fight. They could die like her mom.

One of the other guys with a gun smirked at Y/n. He was young and bold looking. He spoke to Y/n and she could hear the smile on his face, “I’d ask if you were spies for the other but you’re girls. What girls would help them out? So that leaves me with only one assumption,” He grinned and nudged Y/n, “You’re lookin for a date.”

Y/n doesn’t speak.

Jirou snorted, “You wish. No we’re looking for our friends. The other had us but we got away.” Y/n shot her a dirty look and Jirou scowled. “Don’t give me that look Y/n. Mom says we need to remember some ways of the world before an manners is one of the things we all seem to forget about.”

The man with the gun grinned, “Her mom sounds like the kind of girl we are always looking for. Warm my bed, bake my bread and say please and thank you like a lady should.”

Jirou shoved him, “My mom never warmed no man’s bed. She wasn't no lady. She was a survivor.” The man shoved Jirou back and Y/n caught her.

“Easy kid.”

The leader got in Y/n’s face with his gun. Y/n looked into his dark red eyes angrily, “Her mom just died creating a diversion for her to escape the hunters.” He made a face that surprised Y/n, remorseful.

“I’m sorry Jirou, is it? Never speak ill of the dead, unless they’re the monsters who started all of this.” He held his hands out.”

Jirou sniffed and wiped her nose on her arm, “It’s nothing. She died the way she wanted.” Y/n knew the pain Jirou felt and the strength she hid behind. The leader's eyes told her that he did too.

Hades nudged against her. He was nervous and whined. She looked as they entered a huge camp. The fires were lit making the woods smoky and smelled of food. Her mouth watered as her stomach grumbled. She didn’t the last time she actually ate.

“New recruits?” A man asked, looking Y/n up and down and nodded his head. Hades lunged at him. Y/n seriously thought the wolf could read minds, and that man’s mind was not pure. He jumped back, “Holy shit is that a wolf?”

Y/n laughed, she couldn’t help herself. Hades was hovering over him snarling. The men who had escorted them laughed at the fallen men and Y/n called him, “Hades.”

He snarled once more and ran to Y/n’s side. He stood tall and proud with his chest out. He snarled at everyone.

“You have my friends here don’t you?”

The man with the smile frowned, “Who?”

“A girl and a guy. They’re really good friends.”

His eyes narrowed, “No one’s come recently. Except you.”

“Don’t lie to me. He’s tall with red hair and red eyes. He has an injury on his leg. She’s younger and about my size. She has pink hair and black eyes. They’re really close.”

He shook his head, “Look we don’t have anyone here. We don’t take prisoners.”

Y/n looked at the guns surrounding them and raised her eyebrows.

He laughed, “You were spying on us and have a huge wolf as a pet.”

Y/n didn’t laugh. She wanted Kirishima and Mina,”

Jirou gave Y/n a look, “Why would he bring us here if they’re not here?”

Y/n shrugged, “The smell of food.”

The guy with the gun in her face pointed at Hades, “Keep him under control and we can drop the weapons.”

Y/n patted Hades on the head and scratched his ears. He shook his head once. He was still agitated,

The camp was like nothing Y/n had ever seen. It reminded her of the band of merry men Robin Hood joined in the forest.

She heard a noise she had never heard before. She turned her head when she saw where it came from. A small boy with white blond hair ran past her. He had his arms stretched out. He latched onto Hades, making her jump to his rescue but Hades looked at her and lowered her body for the child.

“Andy no, Not the wolf. Oh my god I’m so sorry.” A dark haired woman walked up to Y/n. She looked older, maybe thirty. She was dressed in a long gathered skirt and a blouse. She was pretty in a simple way. She looked at Jirou and smiled motherly. “We need to get you cleaned up and get some food in that belly. You look like you must be starved.” She looked at the man next to Y/n, “Watch him for me while I get her taken care of?”

The man nodded and kneeled next to the boy who was shrieking and hugging her wolf. Hades panted, contented.

“His name’s Hades. Be careful, okay Andy.” The man put a hand out for Hades to sniff.

Jirou gave her a pleading look as she was getting dragged off. Y/n wanted to reach for her but she didn’t. The woman with the black hair had dark doe eyes that instantly made Y/n feel comfortable.

Y/n looked around and noticed that there were fires everywhere. Small tents lined the forest and lean-tos were staggered amongst them. She had never seen anything like it. Clothes hung from lines in the trees. The canopy provided the perfect shelter. She felt like she had entered a sacred site. Everyone was busting about, as if on a mission.

“This is like the Shire.”

“You’ve read The Hobbit?”

Her neck almost snapped as she looked back him,”Yeah, have you?”

He nodded and patted Hades once more.

“Wolfie wolfie wolfie.” The white haired angel cries into Hades’s dark fur. He looked down with the hug and struggled to escape.

“He’s done.”

The man pulled the boy off, making him make an ungodly noise, “Nooo Bakugo. I wanna hug the wolfie. I wanna wolfie. Miiiine.”

Y/n gasped, “Bakugo?” The eyes and the smile. He looked almost exactly how they described him. “Mina and Kirishima’s friend Bakugo?”

His face dropped, “Mina and Kirishima? My friends?” Y/n nodded. His face grew savage. He let go of the boy and gripped her arm harshly. He shouted in her face, “Where are they?”

Y/n pointed, “I thought they were here.”

Hades didn’t like the struggle going on. He lept in between them and knocked Bakugo to the ground. He had him by the scruff of his shirt and was making a noise she had never heard before.

“Hades.”

He ignored Y/n. She sat on the ground and made a whistle sound and Hades tugged once more on his shirt before backing away. He turned and sauntered towards her. He was overwhelmed. She was overwhelmed. He curls onto her lap and as she stroked his ears while he trembled.

Bakugo stood up and walked toward Y/n. Hades growled and snarled in her lap. She looked up at Bakugo.

“I wouldn’t move if I were you.”

His dark eyes played in the dim light of dusk, “They’re alive?”

“Last time I saw them.”

His jaw tenses up.

Y/n turned to see a rugged man walk up to where they were, “Bakugo I need to go over some things with you.”

The white haired boy saw the man and started his tirade all over again. He was stomping his feet and pointing at Hades who trembled. She wrapped her arms around him and glared at the young boy. She hated children.

“Stop that you little brat. You’ll get us all killed,” Y/n hissed at him. The noise would no doubt draw the others or worse.

Bakugo laughed at her but his expression was lost.

Jirou walked over to Y/n in a clean dress with patches. Her hair was slicked back and wet. She was holding a platter of sorts covered in meat and something white.

“Y/n thith ith cheeth. You have to have thum.” Her mouth was near bursting as she spoke. Y/n grimaced watching her stuff her mouth. She sat beside Hades and Y/n. He raised his face instantly and started eating from Jirou’s plate.

Hades was making his weird wolf noise that he made when he was happy. It almost sounded like a cat purring but lower and deeper inside of him.

The platter was empty and Y/n had had nothing. She couldn’t stop looking up at Bakugo, who was talking to another man. He glanced at Y/n every now and then. She could tell that he wanted to talk to her.

“The people I’m looking for, Mina and Kirishima, Bakugo is their friend.” She pointed to him subtly.

Jirou raised an eyebrow, “You think that’s why Hades brought us here?”

Y/n shrugged, “Maybe. I think he smelled the food.”

Jirou grinned with food in her teeth, “Thank god for Hades and his belly.”

“I’m worried about where they are though. If they’re not here, where could they have gone?”

“The farms,” Jirou said nonchalantly, even though Y/n knew that Jirou feared the idea of it whether he had met them or not.

Y/n’s skin prickled thinking about them in the farms. Mina was old enough to be put to ‘work’ and Kirishima was strong. He would be made to work hard labor.

Y/n looked up and saw people eyeballing them. They pretended to be working near them, but they watched Hades as he ate. It made Y/n smile. If only they know how much of a pussycat he was.

She felt fingers bite into her skin, “Wolfie mine!” He shouted in her face. The little brat was back. She hated him. His greedy little fingers were wiping an orange paste on her shirt. She leaned away from him.

“Don’t look so horrified. He’s just a kid.” Bakugo picked the little monster up and carried him back to the doe eyed lady. Y/n felt sorry for her. She thought that her life must be horrid. Y/n looked at the orange stain mixed with debris smeared across her sleeve

She glanced up at Bakugo, “Is there somewhere I can wash up?”

He nodded at the dark haired lady, “Mary can take you.”

Mary smiled, “Followed me.” She passes the evil beast with the white hair to a man next to her. Y/n looked at Jirou who nodded.

“Just don’t get roped into the dress and them brushing your hair. It’s a bad experience. Hades is fine here with me.”

Y/n walked away from Hades, she knew that he would see the fear in her eyes and follow. She didn’t want him anywhere near the little monster

“You’ve never seen a child before have you?” Mary asked sweetly as they walked past a grouping of tents and lean-tos. She led her down a steep narrow dirt path.

“Not in over ten years. Just the ones left behind when the mom’s get taken. I don’t hang around long enough to get to the know them though.”

“That’s horrible. You leave little kids alone?”

Y/n didn’t care if she judged her. She was alive, “I was a kid too Mary. I barely took care of myself and Hades.”

Mary crossed her arms, “He gets tired once it’s after six. He really is a sweet boy. Once you get to know him, you’ll love him.”

She tried not to be rude but spoke her mind, “He will get you killed with noises like that. The infected love noisy things that lead to food.”

Mary looked back aghast, “We never leave camp. None of the children do.”

“So you have an agreement with the infected and the others that they stay out of your camp so the kids can be as noisy as they want?” Her sarcasm was filled with more sarcasm.

Mary laughed, “You really don’t have any social skills do you

She shrugged, “I’ve made it this long out there, alone.”

Mary looked shocked, “How long have you been alone.”

Y/n sighed, “Since the beginning.”

The walls surrounding the water were high and rocky. Nothing could get to the massive lagoon of crystal clear dark green water. The only visible path was the one she was standing on. She pulled her boots and socks off. Her scabs stung on the dirt and rocks. She pulled down her pants and ripped off her shirt. She ran down the remainder of the path. She ran onto the huge flat rocks that made a platform and dived in. The cold ripped through her instantly but she had never felt this clean. She remembered her baths as a small kid. They were filled with bubbles and hard plastic mermaids. This was much better. The freshness of the water made her feel alive in a good way. She lied on her back and floated.

She looked over at Mary as she jumped off the rock. Y/n blushed as she entered the water with a big splash. Mary had been completely naked. Y/n had never seen another naked lady before.

Suddenly a noise ripped through the air. She turned as several people jumped into the water. The waves and splashes were taking over the lagoon.

“Oh my god it’s freezing.” Y/n saw a small blonde girl who was a little older than she was next to her. Her teeth chattered and suddenly Y/n realized that her teeth were chattering too.

In a split second a hand pushed Y/n underwater. She sputtered and coughed as she forced her head above the water.

“Hey are you okay,” a guy asked, Y/n assumed it was the one who had pushed her under. Everyone was staring at her and she ran.

She ran faster to get away from their voices. She felt like a freak. She made her way to the nearest fire. She was alone, until she felt the warm breath at her hip. His cold nose felt warm against her bare skin. Y/n went to go grab her dirty clothes but Mary was there, holding a pile.

“Here,” she said. She was dripping wet too. They stood looking at each other in the firelight. Mary was so beautiful in her soaked dress with the water dripping from her.

“Thanks,” Y/n took the pile and pulled on the shirt and pants over her soaked underwear. She pulled her bra off once the shirt was on and covered her.

Mary took it in her hand, “What’s your name?”

“Y/n.”

Mary leaned in and kissed Y/n on the cheek softly, “Y/n it’s okay. You’re safe here. No infection and no others and no military. We take care of each other.” She took Y/n’s soaking bra and pile of dirty clothes and left. Y/n stood by the fire and realized she had kissed her. She had liked that Mary kissed her. It was a nice feeling. Not nice the way Kirishima’s was. Hers was sweet and soft. It made her happy.

She looked down at Hades, who had turned his face in the light of the fire and whined. She patted his head and looked to where Mary walked. She dropped Y/n’s clothes into a basket and pointed to a bright orange glow in the woods across the camp. “Come to the fire. We sing and play guitar.”

Y/n pulled on her dry clothes and wrapped her arms around herself. Hades and Y/n followed Mary through the woods to where a large bonfire is burning. She could hear the music faintly in the crackle of the flames and embers. It was folk music, but better. She hadn’t heard music since before. She felt like an outsider but the people at the fire smiled at her. Someone shoved over on the log in front of her to make space. Hades watched her sit in a crowd. He didn’t know how to respond to it and whined a little.

Heat waves rose from the huge fire making it hard to see across where the musicians sre. The logs were built higher than the people sitting. She could make out a man with a small guitar. He was old and had a beard. A man started singing with the small guitars. His voice was incredible. It was raspy and sweet. Y/n was in a trance. She sat and closed her eyes. The music brought back something soft and sweet that she never knew she was missing. The sweet voice sent shivers down her spine and her throat was thick with unfelt emotions. They sat in a huge circle, warmed by the fire and the raw human emotions inside of the song. It was about love and sacrifice.

This was the greatest moment of her life. She had experienced nothing like this, even before. Time passed, she didn’t know how much. Songs were sung. Whiskey was passed and drank and swayed her body like everyone else. Her guard was not only lowered but completely destroyed.

In the light Y/n could see Mary. She sang and laughed and drank. Her eyes sparkled in the orange glow.

Slowly people trickled away from the fire. Hades had crept up and was lying at her feet. The pile of logs and lumber on the fire had burned down to ash and in the embers she had seen something she never expected. Bakugo was the singer with the haunting voice that had lit her up. He felt the music, she could see that. His eyes were closed and his fingers gently stroked the guitar. He finished the song and Y/n couldn’t help but see him differently.

He walked over to where she was sitting and sat down beside her.

“You’re a good singer.”

“We need to talk.”

Sitting beside him made her insides crawl.. He didn’t look sweet and soft like Mary did. He looked annoyed and angry with her. She felt intimidated by him. He didn’t seem like the goof Mina described. He was intense.

“I know you.”

His long legs seemed huge compared to hers. His were thick and strong looking. His face was handsome like Kirishima’s, but more commanding. She wanted to listen to him for some reason. She felt like he could keep her safe, like he did with everyone else there.

“So where are they?”

She shook her head and tried not to watch his mouth. “I don’t know. They were at my farmhouse last time I saw them?”

“How did thg look?

Y/n gulped, “Great. Kirishima was hurt a bit but I got him medicine. They were fine when I left though.”

“Where did you meet them?

“First my cabin,” She stated the story at the beginning and tried to not stare at his lips as he processed what she had to say. She wanted him to sing to her more.

im so tired holy fuck

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parkersharthook · 4 years

Text

Sorry For The Disruption

(Tom x female!reader)

warnings: mentions of weed, I think some curse words

1.8K+ words

Requested by the lovely @im-not-okay-i-promise1452 You’re a teacher and now with this quarantine and social distancing situation going on, you’re expected to teach your classes from the “comfort” of your apartment. Unfortunately, this idea doesn’t really accommodate for those that will be living with three loud boys who never know when to be quiet

~.~

“yeah mom I still have classes, it’ll all just be online now.” There was a pause as you fiddled with your apartment keys, “The kids are gonna hate it.”

Well that sucks honey, I’m sorry.

You shrugged, forcing your screen to press harder against your cheek. “it’s not that big of a deal. It’ll take some time to get used to, but my kids are smart and I’m sure they’ll do just fine.”

You’re planning on staying in, right?

“yeah, I just ran to the supermarket to do some grocery shopping but we should be good for the next week and a half at least.”

You didn’t bulk buy, did you? Everyone is doing that here and I was barely able to get any toilet paper.

You let out a small chuckle as you pushed into your apartment, “no mom I didn’t. Just got some necessities and did regular grocery shopping. I’ll go back out in a week or two or I’ll have some new supplies delivered. We’ll see how bad it all gets.”

Ok well stay safe sweetheart. Tom’s home right?

“yeah he is.” You set the bags on the counter and smiled as you watched Tom immediately go to the hallway to help with the rest.

Is anyone staying with you through this? I know you guys have friends over a lot.

“Yeah.” You shifted the phone to your other ear. “Harrison’s apartment is getting fumigated so he’ll be staying with us. And I think Harry is staying with us for a week too, I’m pretty sure he’s sick of his house right now.”

I know the feeling. Your sister is trying to figure this online thing out and I’m trying to be patient with her but she’s driving me crazy.

You frowned slightly, wishing you could be there to help out. “Well I’m sorry I’m not there. I would’ve come to help out if I knew there would be a travel ban.”

Oh it’s okay sweetheart. It’s pretty bad over here too. I think we just need to stay home and stay calm.

“yeah…” You sighed and ran a hand through your hair, “how is y/s/n taking all of this?”

She’s sad. Her prom and graduation just got cancelled so she spent yesterday crying. She’s trying to play it off but I know it’s affecting her.

“I’m sure. That’s definitely not how I would’ve wanted my senior year to go.”

There’s still a chance that they’ll have a dance or something at the school if this all calms down so we’ll see.

“well I hope it all works out for her. I’m gonna let you go mom, I have to put away some groceries and I’m sure you have work to do as well.”

Okay honey. I’ll talk to you soon and please keep in touch.

“I will. Love you.”

Love you.

A deep sigh and a click to the phone and you were washed in silence. It didn’t last long though as Tom strolled through the door with his arms full of groceries.

He smiled and pecked your cheek. “are you sure you didn’t bulk buy?”

You rolled your eyes and started putting away some cans. “please, you eat this much every week. And now we’re feeding Haz and Harry. I had to get a lot.”

“you’re sure you’re okay with them staying this week?” His hand grazed your waist as he passed by you in the small kitchen.

You smiled warmly at him, “of course. They’re my family too.”

Tom returned the smile and gave you a chaste kiss. You didn’t want to break it, but you had frozens. You gave him one last peck before turning and opening the freezer. “I do have an online class tonight though so I’ll need you guys to be somewhat quiet.”

“do you need the den?”

You shook your head, reaching up on your tip toes to put away a can of peanuts. Tom smiled and came behind you, easily taking it from your hand and placing it on the shelf.

“I’ll let you guys have the common spaces, I’ll just use the desk in our room.”

“okay love.” Tom pecked your cheek and gave your waist a squeeze. A ding came from his phone and he spun around to check it. “they’re here.”

“one last kiss?”

“of course.” He smiled as he pressed his lips softly against yours. You quickly wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him in deeper. You knew that your PDA would be cut back with both his best friend and brother in the apartment. You needed to make this kiss last. You felt his strong, warm hands come around your back and lower to the curve of your ass. And right as you were about to kiss him even deeper- ping!

You groaned slightly and pulled away, patting his chest to signal the end. He smiled at you sympathetically before moving to the door to let them in. There was a sudden rush of noise as the two boys quickly came in with their luggage and greeted Tom before coming to you. You smiled through the oncoming headache… you could do this.

~.~

“I have my class for the next 45 minutes or so, so I’m gonna need y’all to be somewhat quiet.” You told the three as you grabbed your laptop and backpack and moved towards the bedroom.

“we’re doing a puzzle; how loud could we get?” Harry said as he studied the box.

“knowing you guys? Pretty loud.” You sent them a warning glare before you went back to the bedroom. You sat in the office chair, opened your laptop, and launched the meeting for your students.

You waited patiently as your students slowly began to pop up on your screens in various degrees of ready. Some were wearing pajamas, one was in a very vibrant and tight dress, another boy was shirtless, and there was even one smoking a blunt. You rubbed your head, why did I start teaching high schoolers?

“Okay guys I know this whole thing is a little weird and this is our first meeting so this will be more like an orientation but I do have to go over a few rules.” You sighed as you started talking to your class. “Each session will be recorded for educational and safety purposes so Ryan, I really suggest no smoking on camera. You all also need to be appropriately dressed so Dylan you need to put a shirt on and Ashley, I would recommend a sweater. I personally don’t care if you guys eat while in these sessions, I know a lot of them might interrupt your day to day life but please either mute yourself or chew quietly because that is a gross sound to hear over video.”

There was a small wave of chuckles that went across your students. You watched as your two students that needed to change throw on sweatshirts but unfortunately Ryan was still smoking.

“Ryan I really need you to-”

“Babe! We need you to settle a debate.” You whipped around to see Tom’s head poking through the door.

“Tom, I’m teaching a class!”

He grimaced, “sorry! Sorry y/n’s class!” he quickly ducked out of the room leaving you to groan and spend back around to your class.

“sorry about that guys. Much like you, me and my family are all working from home so it’s a little chaotic.”

“Was that your fiancé?” Gemma asked.

You smiled and nodded. You knew your students knew you had a fiancé, but you had been very secretive about who he was. You knew that your students would never get any work done if they knew that Tom Holland was your boyfriend.

“again sorry about that. Let’s get back to this. Ryan, I’m really going to need you to put that out.” A beat. “thank you. So basically with this class we’ll have a few online assignments-” CRASH!

“Ah what the hell Harry?!”

“I didn’t do anything!”

“well obviously you did!”

You frowned deeply and apologized to your students before getting up and going to the door, opening it and looking down the hallway. You saw probably half of their 1000 piece puzzle on the floor. “You guys really need to be quiet. I’m trying to teach!” You slammed the door and stomped back over to the computer.

“I’m going to try to get this out as quick as possible because obviously everyone in my household doesn’t know how to be quiet. I’ll be assigning a few online things, but I don’t want to just stick you guys with busy work. We’ll be meeting twice a week on zoom so you guys can ask me any questions you have on any of the work. I will also be available to reach by email from 9 to 4 everyday so if you have any questions just email me. Ummm, I understand that this change to online is hard for all of us so I’ll definitely try to be flexible with you guys and I ask that you do the same for me. Any questions?”

Margaret raised her hand, “are our tests and quizzes going to be online?”

You nodded, “yeah they will. The teachers are still working with the school to figure everything out so when I have more information on that I will let you know. Anything else?”

“If we can’t make a meeting what should we do?”

“well every meeting will be recorded so you can access-”

“Y/n!” You looked to the door with an angry expression but before you could stop him, he ran over and grabbed your hand. “we finished the puzzle first! You got to come see!”

“Tom I’m still teaching!” You quickly pulled your hand away and lightly pushed him out of the frame.

“I am so sorry you guys.”

“was that Tom Holland?!”

“Is Tom Holland your fiancé?!”

Your students rattled of questions faster than you could comprehend them and all you could do was glare at tom as he smiled sheepishly. He mouthed sorry as you narrowed your eyes at him.

“I am so sorry but obviously we won’t be talking about anything else and I don’t want to keep you longer than I have to so please email me any and all of your questions. Bye guys!” You ended the meeting before they could respond and you instantly whipped around to face Tom.

“Love... I am so sorry.” Tom began slowly.

You closed your eyes slowly and then opened them back up with a tight smile present on your face. “Thomas Stanley, you are answering every email about you because I cannot handle that right now.”

You could hear Haz and Harry’s laughter from the other room. Fuck, you didn’t know if you could do this for 3 weeks.

490 notes · View notes

xiaodejunletsact · 5 years

Text

8 letters | park jisung

word count: 18,247

genre: highschool!au, baseball player!jisung, a lot of angst and fluff. childhood friends to enemies to friends to lovers lmao

warnings: mentions of bullying, a lot of emotional baggage from jisung’s part, physical fighting, basically lots of high school angst.

author’s note: hey everyone! im finally back from the dead lol, thank you to everyone who has waited to long for this and sent me nice messages, they really encouraged me :) anyway, a couple of things you guys should know before you start are: i tried to make this jisung a lot like real jisung idk if i did but i hope it worked lol and i tried to make as unfiltered of high school experience as you can get. so jisung faces bullying and social pressure in this and the 2000 line and chenle are all the same age as jisung in this. its a long one but i really hope you like it! thank you! (Btw!! this one is for all my 2002 liners who are going into senior year, lets make this year the best one yet!)

synopsis: 4 years ago, you and jisung’s long term friendship came to an abrupt end. now in senior year, the two of you find yourselves being forced together again by your mothers. suddenly, jisung begins to ask himself what is more important: his reputation or you.

alternatively;

if all it is is 8 letters, why is it so hard to say?

It had been a long time since you sat at the polished marble table that resides in the Park Household. The mix of colors on the table are weaved with bittersweet emotions as you stare down at them, the spaghetti his mother had served you grew cold as you took in the words your parents were throwing at you.

“We know you guys don’t really get along as well as you used to but the streets are getting dangerous nowadays. Just the other day they jumped a kid from your school!” Your mother says, exasperated. Her eyes were wide as Jisung’s mother nods her head in agreement across the table. The conversation has been going on for a half hour now, despite your clear distaste for the argument.

“I get that, mom. I just don’t see why I can’t just walk to school with Renjun.” She sighs at your words, making eye contact with Jisung’s mother across the table. You tear your gaze away from them to Jisung who scoffs in response to your words. “Is there something funny Jisung?”

“Our moms want us to go to school together so we can be safe, and you want to walk with that twig? He can’t protect you for shit.” He spits out at you, his mother giving him a warning to watch his language before you reply.

“And you can?” He falters momentarily at the sharp gaze you send his way, before shooting one back. Your stare down ends only when your mothers tell you to settle down.

“Jisung has a car now, y/n. It’s safer and you won’t have to take the walk to school every morning… I don’t see why you can’t just do this.” She looks at you with a pleading look, the type she knows you’ll give into. You shift your gaze away from her face and sigh. Jisung speaks up.

“Shouldn’t I have a say in this? It’s my car!” He sounds as frustrated as you feel. His mother laughs.

“Remind me, who pays that car?” This shuts him up immediately, producing a chuckle out of you while he huffs. Your mothers watch the interaction with a sigh. “Please guys, we just want you to be safe. You guys used to be best friends! How hard can it be to spend 20 minutes together?”

Very hard.

The air in the car is thick when Jisung picks you up the next Monday morning, the silence between you two is filled with an indie pop album that plays on the radio when you get in.

The inside of his car smells strongly of cologne, though it’s unfamiliar to you. You figured he started using it after you guys stopped being friends; it wouldn’t be the only thing that has changed while the two of you were apart. Like the bright laughter and easy conversations that one surrounded you two, that is now replaced with thick silence and tension. There’s also Jisung, who seems a lot more mature now, who joined the baseball team and became one of the most popular guys in school or the fact that he has a car and also the fact that he hasn’t talked to you since he told you he didn’t want to be friends anymore at the beginning of your freshman year of highschool.

Even now, you try to figure out what changed. What tables turned in Jisung’s head that caused him to react the way he did towards you. At the time, you supposed it was one of those friendship fallouts you see in movies, where things just don’t work out; that’s what split you two apart. However, you know that wasn’t the case when Jisung arrives the following week to school, contacts replacing his round glasses you loved so much and his arm wrapped around Jessica - the most popular and bitchiest girl in school. You recall the nauseating feeling you got when you saw him; it being the exact moment you realize that things had really changed, that this wasn’t just a friendship fallout, Jisung cut you out of his life so he could start a new one.

Without you.

Though it took a while, you began to realize that the Jisung you knew was long gone, no longer will he be fanboying to you about a new video game he’s into or a baseball game he has watched over and over. No longer will he be putting cute sticky notes in your locker. No longer was he your best friend. He was now popular guy every girl in school had a crush on, that wears his hair up and hangs out with the resident school asshole jocks.

The best thing you could do was ignore it, pretend it didn’t happen by stuffing all of his things deep in your closet and never looking at them again. You occupied your thoughts by making new friends and picking up new hobbies, which led you to Renjun -who helped you through everything and was there for you when Jisung wasn’t. He took your mind off things and kept you busy and although he was your rock and you appreciate his company and friendship immensely, there are still times where you find yourself falling down the rabbit hole of questions and thoughts surrounding the Jisung situation.

When your mother suddenly starts questioning what happened, where he is and saying that she misses him. You can only shrug as your mood dampens at his mention, rushing to your room and holding down the words that are threatening to escape:

Me too.

Your thoughts are interrupted by the sound of an opening car door, you barely have any time to process the scene in front of you because Jisung is already rushing into the gates of the school. Leaving you alone in his car.

You watch as he jogs up to his jock friends and becomes one of them. He puts on his baseball jock skin and fits right in like he was never the boy who would sneak into your house when he was feeling lonely.

He wasn’t anymore.

You unbuckle your seatbelt and exit the car and walk into school, preparing to do what you do best: pretend it doesn’t matter.

You try especially hard to pretend it doesn’t matter as you wait for Jisung outside the school for two hours after the dismissal bell has rung. Your foot taps impatiently on the ground as you send him a 4th text asking him where he is. You can’t help but feel embarrassed; he stood you up, left you stranded on there and is on his way home probably laughing his ass off.

You were foolish to think he would actually hold up his end of the deal and just be a good human being this once. You sigh and shake your head, trying to brush off the embarrassment off your mind as walk towards the school gates, starting the journey to your house. Trying your best to not think about it until the sound of your shoes against the sidewalk is disturbed by the sound of Jisung’s voice.

“Hey!”

He’s standing near the entrance of the school, his hair wet, his torso covered is a loose T-shirt, different to the one he was wearing this morning and his chest was heaving like he had been running. You’re too far away to tell if the look on his face is upset or confused. “Where are you going? Get in the car!” You scoff at him and march your way up to him. Pointing an accusing finger at him you spit out.

“You left me waiting here for nearly 2 hours! I was going home!” Jisung looks at you with a confused expression before shrugging his shoulders.

“I had baseball practice, I thought you knew.”

“How would I know? I don’t keep up with the baseball team. You didn’t tell me either.”

Jisung sighs and open the door to the passenger gets side, “Can you just get in so we can go?”

After staring harshly at him for a few seconds, you reluctantly get into the car. Jisung closes the door behind you and you watch as he walks around the car to the drivers side, seating himself before starting the car.

At first you drive in silence, which you figured is better than fighting, until Jisung turns down the radio.

“Since the season is starting, I’m gonna have practice everyday after school for the next few weeks.”

You nod at his words silently planning in your head what the hell you're going to do at school for 2 hours. Before you can think of a reply, Jisung turns up the radio, signifying the conversation is over. You bitterly settle back into your seat.

When you arrive to your street, Jisung pulls into his driveway and just like this morning, rushes out of the car and into his house like you have the plague, without sparing you a word.

You cross the street from his driveway to your own and look back at his house one last time. The light of his room is turned on now, you can see his silhouette faintly through the curtains as he moves sound his room. You shake your head as you look away, rushing into your house without looking back.

Maybe it’s the fact that you’ve interacted more with Jisung in the past two days than to have in the past two years or maybe you were just feeling nostalgic, because there could be no other reason you find yourself reaching into the deepest part of your closet later that night, taking out the box for the first time since you bid that part of your life farewell all those years ago.

It’s covered in a thick layer of dust that floats through the air as finally bring it out. You take a seat on the floor of your room and place the box in front of you, taking a deep breath before taking out the first item. A handheld mirror.

You instantly find yourself smiling, the mirror had been a birthday gift from Jisung. You flip it to see the faded words written on the back, that cause your eyes to gloss over:

“E`````very time you tell me that you hate the way you look, I lose brain cells bc you’re one of the prettiest girls out there. Please see what i see. Happy birthday, y/n - Jisung <3”

You remember using the mirror for practically everything after receiving it, feeling that it somehow made you beautiful. You turn it once again and look at your crying reflection, and you can’t help but think that maybe the effect has worn off after so many years.

Wiping your tears, you continue to pull out items which mostly consisted of small drawings, key chains and picture frames. The last thing in the box was one of Jisung’s sweatshirts he had given to you a few days before he told you he didn’t want to be friends. You pull it out and examine it, you had worn it many times before he had given it to you but it still had his smell lingering on it. You don't know why but suddenly you’re being engulfed in his scent and your body is covered in warmth, the hoodie wrapping around you feeling so familiar it brings tears to your eyes once again.

You decide that you didn’t care if this was Jisung’s hoodie. It’s your hoodie now and you can wear it whenever you want (of course deep down you know that’s just an excuse to feel close to him once again.)

Just as you’re about to start putting the items back in the box, you notice an envelope at the bottom of the box. You gasp gently as you pick it up, hands wrapping around the old worn out envelope, thick from all its contents. You spill them onto the floor and feel a tear drop down your cheek as you see all the different colored sticky notes splayed across your floor, all containing motivating messages and small drawings to make you smile. Jisung would give you one everyday and you would give him one in return, although you doubt he has kept his.

Hundreds of papers that accumulated during the long years of friendship stare back at you. You cry as you read through them; some sweet, others silly and some that made your heart flutter even now. You try your best to stop your tears as wonder how all of these notes that meant the world to you, could cease so easily as if it never mattered. But then again, after the way things played out, you figure it never did.

Your interactions with Jisung for the rest of the week consists of nothing bit of small talk and one word responses. Until 4 days later, on Friday morning, Jisung breaks the silence after turning down the radio.

“You know, you should wait by the bleachers after school from now on.”

His words produced a confused look on your face. The bleachers? You had just found a comfortable spot at a picnic table where there wasn’t many people that you comfortably do homework while you waited for him after school. “Why? What’s wrong with the picnic table?”

Jisung’s grip tightens on the steering wheel as he searches his mind for a response, “It’s outside of the campus, something could happen to you.”

Your eyes widen as you take in his words, did he just imply that he cares about you? After all these years, is the caring Jisung you knew coming back to you?

“And my mom would kill me if something happened to you.” He adds, you’re sure that if he were to have been looking at you, he would have seen you visibly deflate. You should’ve known better.

“I’ll be fine at my picnic table by myself.” You miss the perplexed look Jisung tried to conceal as you disagree with him. He rushes to search for another excuse to get you to do as he asked.

“The,” he pauses before adding quickly, “your picnic table is at the farthest point to the parking lot, i have to wait an eternity for you to get there after practice!”

You scoff at his selfishness and look out the window, “I’d rather you wait a bit than expose myself to those man eating baseball jocks.” It is a mutter, but Jisung hears every word.

“Man eating baseball jocks?”

“Yes, man eating baseball jocks. They’re all a bunch of assholes.”

Jisung scoffs, offended. “We are not!”

“I didn’t say you were, I said they were.” Your words seem to ease the tension in his body as he relaxes a bit in his seat before saying:

“They’re… not that bad.” He doesn’t sound too convinced himself, his words sound forced and fake. Even then, you turn to him with a shocked look.

“Not that bad? Those guys terrorize almost everyone in our school and traumatize underclassmen.” You click your tongue, frustrated. “After everything they did and said to us, you’re telling me they’re not that bad?”

It’s Jisung’s turn to be shocked at our sudden outburst for a few seconds before he composes himself once again, “That was back then, y/n. People change.”

You stop yourself from reaching up as grabbing onto your hair in frustration, sitting back in the chair and looking out the window. You then say the words that would cause a longing silence for the rest of the ride to school; words that remain in Jisung’s head for the rest of the day.

“I know that better than anyone.”

Jisung ponders your words for the rest of his day, absently staring at blank walls and laughing it off when his friends call for his attention.

He knows that you have every right to be mad at him but he couldn’t help but feel knives prick at his heart as he runs the memory of you saying those bitter words that held so much weight and sadness to them. He reminisces all the times where he told you he would always be there for you, that he promised to be by your side forever, and tries to stop the stinging in his eyes. He wishes things could go back to the way they were, that he could tell you how sorry he is and you guys would be best friends again.

As he stares at himself in the bathroom mirror, he shakes his head slightly, reminding himself that this is for the best. He tries his best to conceal his bloodshot eyes, rubbing his hands over his face and staring back into the mirror. Jisung practices his fake smile (although he’s almost a professional at it considering how much of that he’s been doing) in the mirror, and does what he always does: adjusts the new skin he has given himself and pushes old Jisung into a cage, throwing away the key.

It’s for the best.

You chuckle halfheartedly at something Renjun says as you walk down the hall after school later that day. You feel a bit guilty that you’re giving your friend only a quarter of your attention but you can’t stop your mind from being preoccupied with Jisung. The guilty feeling in your heart after your harsh words to him this morning being the only thing on your mind when a hand wraps around your wrist, stopping you in your tracks and demanding your attention.

“Come with me.” Jisung stands towering above you, you give him a confused look, making a pathetic attempt to take your wrist out of his grip, only to have it tightened.

“Why would she want to go anywhere with you?” Renjun barks at Jisung, who sends a glare his way.

“Because I’m her ride home, asshole. And I don’t want her sitting centuries away from the parking lot and then leave me waiting for her.”

Renjun scoffs and moves forward only to have your free hand press against his chest, pushing him back. “Renjun, it’s okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Renjun shares an uneasy and concerned look between you and Jisung. You reply by nodding your head and smiling reassuringly, which causes him to finally cease and pull into a quick goodbye hug before walking towards the school gates.

Jisung pulls your arm, dragging you towards the bleachers where he sits you down with the calm words, “Wait here.”

Your eye roll is a 7.1 on the Richter scale.

The rowdy baseball team leaves the locker room loudly, alerting you of their presence immediately. You take in a deep breath and try to make yourself as unnoticeable as possible though, you know your plan failed when a shadow is cast onto the notebook sitting in front of you.

“Look who it is!” Over you stands, Jeno: captain of the baseball team (and mind controlling leader of all the jock minions. He is man eating baseball jock at its finest.)

He smiles down mockingly, bringing himself closer to you. “What’s wrong princess? Cat got your tongue?” The taunt causes you to roll your eyes, moving to pack your stuff before things got bad.

However, you figure Jeno’s plans seem to be different when he rips your backpack out of your hands and throws it on the ground next to you. He grabs your jaw harshly and forces your eyes to meet his, he speaks again, only this time, he says it lowly for only you two to hear.

“You trying to get back in Jisung’s pants, huh? After all this time you still don’t understand that he doesn’t want you. He’s one of us now, y/n.” Jeno clicks his tongue as he pulls away and watches the emotions that inevitably settle in your eyes, no matter how much you try to conceal it. He laughs and reaches into his gym back, pulling out a water bottle and taking a short sip. He smirks and before you know it the cold liquid is being poured over your head, soaking your hair, clothes and school books. Jeno laughs once again, “You’re such a pity party, y/n.”

Humiliated, you avert your gaze from him and meet eyes with Jisung, who watches the scene with an expression you can’t quite pinpoint, silent and making no attempts stop Jeno. Not that you expected him to. Even then, you get the same angsty feeling you get every time you realize he’s not who he used to be.

You realize that holding in your tears is harder than you thought it would be when Jeno finally leaves, you pack your things as quickly as you possibly can and bolt out of there. Leaving a conflicted and guilty Jisung behind.

All that’s to be heard around you as walk home is the sounds of your small sniffles and the thud of your sneakers on the pavement below you.

The cool autumn wind blows against your wet clothes and causes you to shiver, your body growing colder.

Frustration and humiliation push you to walk faster as you feel the presence of a car moving slowly beside you. Jisung rolls down the window.

“Y/N! Get in the car!”

You turn your face to him and begin walking faster, practically sprinting. Once you think he’s finally gone, you hear a car door slam shut and footsteps racing to catch up with yours.

Jisung grabs your shoulder and spins you around to face him. “Getting home alone will only get the two of us in trouble.”

You scoff, trying to mask your bloodshot, gloss eyes and emotional state. “Is that all you care about?”

Jisung is quiet for a few seconds before asking, “Are you crying?”

You freeze knowing you’ve been caught before turning and beginning to walk away, “Go away, Jisung.”

Jisung moves to stand in front of you, and speaks in a boardline soft voice. “Just get in the car.”

“Leave me alone.”

“I’m sorry about what happened, okay? I didn’t think they would do something like that.”

You remain quiet, taking in his words. Jisung was never one to apologize even when you two were friends, his words shock you momentarily before you remember that this isn’t the Jisung you used to know. Maybe new Jisung says sorry without meaning it like the rest of the baseball jocks do.

“Aren’t going to say anything?” Jisung masks his nerves over saying those words that are foreign on his tongue with impatience and indifference.

Another breeze blows and Jisung watches in concern as you shiver, wanting nothing more than to rip the hoodie of his body and cover yours with it.

“Take me to my house, please.”

You figure it’s because of the unfortunate weather paired with your unfortunate situation or maybe it’s the fact that Jisung is standing before you asking for you to get in his car and saying sorry to you for the first time in his life.

You wish it was the former.

As soon as the car comes to a stop, you reach for the handle to open the door to no avail. You turn confusedly to Jisung who sits in the driver's seat looking forward hand sitting on the control where the locks of the car are.

“What are you doing? Open the door.”

Jisung shakes his head and looks your way, “You never accepted my apology.” His eyes hold something truly desperate and troubled, you are shocked once again at the emotion you see in the boy who has been cold as ice to you for the last two years.

Still, you recall the events that took place earlier that day and find yourself feeling bitter. “Was I supposed to?”

“Yes!” Jisung looks at you wide eyed and offended, thinking you would know him enough to know how much those words meant to him.

“You don’t get to decide that, Jisung.”

He scoffs, trying to mask his insecurities and guilt with frustration. “It wasn’t even that big of a deal.”

You let out your own scoff and turn in his direction, your glassy eyes causing Jisung’s stance to deflate slightly. “It was to me! I was so humiliated by those jerks and all you did was sit there and watch! You probably tricked me into going there in the first place, you... set me up. I should've known something like this would happen.”

Jisung feels the cracks in his heart deepen as he takes in your words, the way you view him now evident. Even then, he tries miserably to defend himself. “I would never do that, I’m.. I’m not that cruel.”

“I didn’t think so either Jisung. Not today and not four years ago when you left me to be one of those man eating, toilet licking jocks!” You look him straight in the eyes with your tear filled ones, “But you said it yourself: people change. And I don’t know who you are anymore.”

The cracks go further down until they’ve snapped off completely, splitting Jisung’s heart in two and letting the pieces sink down his chest, pass his lungs to his stomach where he thinks it will remain for the rest of his life.

You, on the other hand, can feel nothing but the fear and embarrassment of having shared too much. Your hands move on their own as you attempt once again to open the door.

“Y/N I-“

“Open the door, please.” This time, he does. No words filling the air as you rapidly gather your things and basically run into your house leaving Jisung alone in his car.

Poor Jisung looks down at his poor hands, clenching and opening them to feel like he has control over something in his life.

He’s not who he wants to be. He wants to be able to outwardly fanboy about video games and baseball to you like he used to. He wants you to call him stupid but still show interest to whatever nonsense comes from his mouth; he wants you.

His new skin has never fit this badly before.

Why the fuck is high school so hard?

When Monday morning comes around, Jisung holds his sweaty hands against the steering wheel of his car, waiting in front of your house. You’re late, (23 minutes to be exact; not that he’s counting) the fact making Jisung think that maybe Friday was the last straw for you, and that you were done trying to tolerate Jisung even for your mom’s sake.

Even though he knows you have every reason to hate him, the mere thought makes it harder for him to breathe.

Deep in thought, Jisung doesn’t notice the figure walking towards the passenger side of his car until there is a knock on the window that causes him to jump.

Jisung calms down upon seeing your mother at the window, an amused/slightly concerned look adorning her face.

“Honey, I’m sorry for scaring you! I thought you saw me coming!” She chuckles out the last words and all Jisung can do is laugh nervously in response. “Anyway, Y/N isn’t going to school today, she has been sick all weekend. I think she got caught some rain on Friday and has a cold, she’ll be better soon I’m sure.” Your mother stops her rant to send an apologetic look Jisung’s way, “I’m sorry you had to wait, I told her to let you know so this wouldn’t happen, I guess she didn’t.”

Jisung shakes his head, “It’s okay, ma’am. I hope she feels better soon.”

She gives Jisung a motherly smile that he has missed so much. He remembers all the days he would spend at your house and how your family basically became his own, all the times she would give him that smile before ruffling his hair. Jisung feels his eyes glass over and looks away. Your mother seems to notice and says in an affectionate, motherly tone: “Honey, everything is going to work out in the end.”

Jisung sniffles as he lets tears freely fall down his cheeks, “I don’t know what to do.”

She just smiles and leans further into the car, just enough to be able to reach out and wipe the tears from his cheeks. The familiar motherly gesture from her making him feel a little at ease for the first time in 4 years.

“What do you want to do?”

What does he want?

He wants to play baseball, he wants people to like him, he wants to be captain of the team one day, he wants to be the Park Jisung everyone loved and wanted to be.

But… he also wants to be able to be the Park Jisung he used to be, who would obsess over video games and hang out at your house more than his own, who had you as a best friend and didn’t have to go to school worrying about his reputation

Now pacing a few feet from your front door, left hand holding a bag carrying your favorite soup and right hand rubbing nervously at his jeans, trying to get the sweat off of them, Jisung thinks that maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.

What if your favorite soup changed?

What if your dog doesn’t like him anymore?

What if you don’t want to see him and tell him to get out?

What if-

“Jisung?”

He nearly gets whiplash from how fast he turns to face your father who stands at the doorway smiling. “Long time since you’ve been here, what’s up?”

Jisung laughs nervously, “Yeah, it’s been a while…” He pauses, unsure on whether to ask for you or not.

Then he realizes, just like your mother, your father was a second father figure to Jisung all throughout his childhood, he sees right through him and smiles knowingly. “She’s in her room.”

Your house hasn’t changed one bit since he stopped coming over. The same beige carpeted floors and the same pictures of the walls, even some of the two of you together as kids.

He hears thudding on the floor and suddenly he’s being knocked over by a giant ball of fur that licks his face and excitedly wags its tail. Jisung feels some weight lift of his shoulders as he pets the dog, “I missed you too, Jojo.”

It’s strange how everything can be exactly the same but at the same time totally different. How everything between you two turned cold and these walls and this home were just waiting for him to get some sense knocked into him and come back finally.

Maybe the walls weren’t the only ones waiting.

After knocking on your door for several minutes with no response, Jisung decides to open the door a crack, just enough for him to be able to look inside and see you fast asleep. He ponders over what to do at your doorway, nervously looking at you from the door frame.

After considering his options, he opts for just leaving the soup on your desk and leaving quickly, hoping your father tells you he stopped by. However, as he sets the bag on your desk something draped over your desk chair catches his eye.

His sweatshirt.

Jisung reaches for it hesitantly, hand shaking for a reason he can’t pinpoint. His fingers meet the soft material of it’s fabric and he feels himself remembering all the times he had seen you the sweatshirt whenever you stayed over at his house. He recalls the night he walked dolefully to your house with the sweatshirt in his hands, on his way to cut things off with you. At the memory, he immediately reaches into the pocket, letting his hands search through it until it comes in contact with something.

It’s still there.

He wonders if you haven’t read it, or if you did and stuffed it back in the pocket and pretended you hadn’t, choosing not to dwell on the boy who left you.

He also wonders if you wear it, if you ever think about him when you have it on.

If you get sad or if it’s warmth reminds you of the good times you spent together. Jisung grips the material in his fingers and brings it up to his chest. Eyes closed, he presses the sweatshirt close to his body.

It smells like you. But it also smells faintly of him. Jisung smiles as breathes in the mixture of scents that brings back good memories.

He can’t believe this sweatshirt as managed to keep the two of you together as he tore you apart. His want to fix things with you grows stronger and stronger as he stands in your room, gripping onto his sweatshirt.

Jisung hears a gasp and his eyes snap in your direction, your previously laying figure sits straight up on your bed with a frightened face, your hand over your heart. He freezes, unsure of what to do.

On the other hand, your body relaxes slightly as you realize that it’s just Jisung and not a crazy axe murderer, although you can’t even imagine why he would be in your room right now.

“Jisung?” The boy flinches as you say his name, before dropping the item he had previously in his hands onto the floor. You direct your vision to it and see his -your- sweatshirt which makes your confusion grow further. “What are you doing in here?”

Jisung can’t help but look at your window like he wants to jump out of it. This was definitely not how it was supposed to go. “I- uh well uh your mom told me that you were sick and I thought that maybe you- wanted something to eat? I don’t know. So like I stopped by to bring you this soup. You don’t have to eat it if you don’t want to I just figured since you were sick and stuff you know… maybe you would want some… soup.” He finishes off his rant by pointing to your desk where he had set the bag earlier.

You almost laugh at how awkward he’s being, though your confusion outweighs every other emotion. “Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why did you bring me this soup? Why are you in my room right now?” Your defenses start to come up as you realize how personal the situation is.

Jisung is standing in your room for the first time in 4 years, he was holding the hoodie that used to belong to him and he brought you soup from the place you two used to go as children.

Does he suddenly want to remember? Is this him trying to get back what he gave away?

“I just -“ He sighs, averting his gaze from you to the ground. “Look, I know what I did is terrible and that… you probably hate my guts after what happened… but I just wanted you to know that I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry about everything that has happened between us, including Friday, I just… wanted you to be able to see you and know that you were safe. Not for my mom but for me. I’m sorry for not defending you when the guys did that to you. I let my fear get the best of me like I always do.” He pauses to take a deep breath, simultaneously looking up finally to meet your eyes, you feel your heart contract at the sight of his red, tear filled eyes. “And I’ve been using my moms wishes as an excuse to be with you after so many years but it’s time you finally knew that truth, and it’s that I miss you and it’s sad but spending this week with you has made me feel more than I’ve felt in the past 4 years,” he hiccups as he speaks, “and I know that you probably don’t want anything to do with me and I get that. I really do but no one knows me like you do. No one. And you know I wouldn’t say this if I didn’t mean it but I’ll say it again and again and again…” A tear falls from the corner of his eye. “I’m sorry, y/n.”.

You feel like you’ve been punched but also kissed and hugged tight after Jisung ends his emotional rant.

His words cause a division in your heart and mind over what to make of them.

Your mind says that this will end up like the last time, you’ll buy into all his fake promises and tears and fall for him all over again, only for him to leave you to pick yourself up after he decides he’s had enough of you.

However, your heart gives voice to the fact that this Jisung is strikingly similar to the Jisung you knew once upon a time. He is nothing like the Jisung you’ve seen for the last 4 years who is cold and mean; he is vulnerable and soft spoken, this Jisung just poured his heart out to you and is now standing with his arms wrapped around himself, awaiting your reply.

“Jisung, I-“ you stop yourself and try to choose words carefully while your heart and mind have a heated debate. “I think it’s best if you go.”

The way Jisung curls even further into himself makes your heart hurt, screaming even louder to let her opinion be heard. Fresh tears gather in his eyes that he immediately blinks away, nodding slowly. “I understand.”

“I’m sorry, I just don’t know what to make of all this.” You try your best to not make him feel too horrible while simultaneously protecting yourself.

His broken voice comes stuttering out, thick and sad, “Don’t be sorry, please.”

He spares one last look your way before disappearing through your bedroom door. You hear his quick footsteps as he practically runs out of your house, leaving you alone with your conflicting thoughts and cold soup.

The energy of the events that took place in your room earlier seemed to still be circling around the room, bouncing off the walls and onto you. Sad and conflicting thoughts running through your head 100mph, leaving you restlessly tossing and turning in your bed later that night.

You sigh as you stare up at the ceiling, finally giving into the thoughts that have kept you awake.

What did this mean to Jisung?

What tables turned in his mind that caused the stone cold boy to come into your room (while you slept) with an order of your favorite soup to break down in front of you and go on a rant about how sorry he is?

And if he’s so sorry, why did he do it in the first place?

What changed from Friday to now?

Just when everything was getting better, why did Jisung have to come back into your life and make it complicated for you?

Should you forgive him?

There’s a chance you could get your best friend back… but there’s also a chance he might break your heart again.

You shove your blankets to the floor in frustration, rising off your bed and waking across the room to your light switch. However, on your decent, you step on something soft, only to realize that it’s the sweatshirt Jisung had been holding with tears in his eyes just hours ago.

A sudden confusion washes over you for a different reason, why had Jisung been inspecting the sweatshirt in the first place? You curiously begin to reach into the pockets, immediately feeling the texture of paper on your hand.

Your eyes widen as you pull it out, dropping the sweatshirt back onto the floor. The slip of paper is nearly folded and worn out at the edges, like it had been that way for a long time. Once unfolded, these slightly blurred words stared back at you:

‘My y/n, please understand and please keep me as your favorite boy after this. I’m so sorry. When it’s time, please forgive me -Jisung’

You don’t notice that your eyes fill with tears until they’re dropping onto the small paper below you.

Friday hadn't been the first time he said sorry to you, it was in this little slip of paper years ago.

You were sure he had put the paper in there knowing you probably wouldn’t find it, because there is no way you would’ve let him leave you if you heard those words then. There was no way you would let go of him.

There is no way.

Jisung seems shocked when you knock on the window of his car the next morning.

He had been waiting in front of your house, only 25% expecting you to actually ride to school with after what happened yesterday. Just as he was about to give up and begin his journey to school you present yourself before him with a familiar sweatshirt draped over your figure.

He’s speechless as you get into the car and settle into your seat, only opting to talk a few minutes later.

“What does this mean for us?”

He’s hopeful. God, he wishes he wasn’t this hopeful.

You smile slightly, “I read your note… and I went through some of the letters you gave me a long time ago and some of our other stuff. And… I decided that if you’re really sorry, and if this isn’t some kind of sick prank… then maybe we can be friends again.”

Jisung tries to bite back his wide smile as you finish your sentence, but fails when a giggle leaves his mouth. He’s so so happy. This is the happiest he’s ever been.

You can’t help but smile as well, watching how giddy Jisung got, “What is it?”

Jisung gives you a close lipped smile and shakes his head slightly although, there is still a big smile waiting to break free. He remains that way while he puts the car in drive and pulls out of your street and onto the main road, where he suddenly says: “Does this mean I’m still your favorite boy?”

Now it’s your turn to hold back a smile, “Maybe.”

This time, Jisung lets him smile free, allowing you a view of his pretty, gummy smile and crescent moon eyes. He drums his fingers on the steering wheel and smiles all the way to school.

Things at school remain the same after that.

You two pass each other in the halls as if you were strangers, which, you admit, does leave a slight sting in your heart. However, that sting is overshadowed by how much things have changed between you and Jisung outside of school.

No longer is the air thick or is there a silence that falls over you two as soon as you get in his car every morning. And no longer do you race out of his car as soon as he parks it in front of your house. Now, the atmosphere in the car is full with playful banter and laughs (with the occasional snorts.)

It’s a light feeling; like you’ve put the last 3 years of your life behind you and have defied gravity and are currently floating multiple feet in the air, Jisung’s laughter and playful words surrounding you entirely.

Even though things aren’t how they used to be, in some way, they are better. The new Jisung and the new Y/N get along surprisingly well despite what you may have thought.

Especially at times like these, when Jisung hops into his car excitedly, animedtaly telling you to strap in quickly.

“Where are we going?” You ask, though you’re smiling and slowly fasten your seatbelt. Jisung’s hands comes to rest on the back of your seat and he drives the car in reverse and out of its parking spot.

“You and I are going to Billy’s.” His gaze shifts to you briefly, before focusing back on the road, still smiling. He misses the way your eyes widen and your whole face brightens.

“I haven’t been there in a while.” You say, the driving boy nods in understanding.

“Me neither,” he progressively breaks his car until it comes to a stop at a red light. He takes this chance to look over at you and smiles softly, “We can go back together.”

Once you get to the ice cream shop, Jisung leads you to a table inside. “Wait here. I’ll go order.” You watch as approaches the counter, smiling brightly at the cashier, who greets him enthusiastically. Exclaiming for the whole shop to hear.

“Jisung! You’re finally back, man! It’s been ages!” You recognise the voice as that of Jaehyun, who had been a new worker when you and Jisung were regulars here. You’re shocked that he even remembers him. “Where have you been? Where’s your girl?”

Jisung’s face flushes, he clears his throat, “My girl?”

“Yeah! What was her name again…” There is a pause in his sentence before he snaps his fingers, finally remembering. “Y/N!”

Even though you knew what was coming, you still startle at the sound of your name; you anxiously await Jisung’s reply which comes a bit later, “She’s right over there.” He points to you and you immediately look away, pretending you weren’t listening. Jaehyun looks at you in shock before turning back to Jisung.

“It’s difficult to keep a girlfriend for that long in high school, I’m glad to see you guys together.”

Jisung looks over at you once again except this time, you don’t look away. A soft smile rests on Jisung’s face.

“Yeah, me too.”

“So I’m your girl?”

You and Jisung are on your way home now with ice cream filled bellies after sitting in the shop and talking for 2 hours. You were wondering if you should address his interaction with Jaehyun the whole time, afraid that you would be overstepping. However, once the words leave your mouth, his cheeks flush a deep shade of red; darker than the one at the shop and enough to make your heart flutter but also swell with pride.

“Well, he said that.. And you know, I didn’t want to correct him or make him feel embarrassed or anything so I just went along with it. But if you mind, next time we-”

“I don’t.”

“Huh?”

“I don’t mind.” You’re feeling especially brave today, wanting so desperately to keep that blush on his face.

Jisung looks over at you for a split second with a bewildered look on his face, coughing a bit, he answers in the most stable voice he muster, “okay.”

His answer is a calm and collected one, but his insides are all jumbled up and going crazy, the butterflies in his stomach reeking havoc.

3 days later, you sat at your desk with a thick textbook sat in front of you, you had been tentatively reading the pages for about two hours now, trying to cram as much information as you could for your test tomorrow when you are suddenly startled by a ‘ding!’ coming from from your phone. You smile as you see the message gracing the screen.

jisung park [10:38pm]: hey :)

jisung park [10:38pm]: you still up?

y/n [10:40pm]: yeah, studying

y/n [10:41pm]: what are you doing up?

jisung park [10:43pm]: i was about to go to sleep, then i saw your light on. decided to text you.

jisung park [10:45pm]: just wanted to check on you

Your heart speeds up and you allow yourself to smile widely, you begin to type a reply but halt as soon as you see the three dots appear on your screen indicating the Jisung is typing.

jisung park [10:47pm]: don’t overwork yourself

jisung park [10:48pm]: wait i have an idea

Suddenly your phone is ringing, Jisung’s contact flashing on the screen only briefly as you answer, “Hello?”

“Come to your window.” You can hear the excitement and enthusiasm through the phone and walk to your window, seeing the boy sitting by his own window, curtains pulled back to show his smiling face which becomes brighter the moment he spots your face through the glass. When he speaks his lips move before his voice reaches your ears, but the lag is only a slight one.

“Now its like we’re hanging out, isn’t that cool?”

You chuckle at the purity of this action and the shyness that drips off his words, “Yeah, how come we didn’t think of this before?”

“I don’t know. I guess i’m just a genius.” He laughs when you laugh at his joke.

The next few hours are spent talking about absolutely everything under the sun, school, friends, a new video game Jisung is obsessed with and the fact that the ice cream at Billy’s tasted better now that you guys went together again.

Its nearing 1am when you finally look at the time, gasping. “Jisung, its almost 1.”

“Is it?” Jisung brings his phone away from him ear, looking down at it. His eyes widen when he spots the time, “wow, it is.”

He brings the phone back up to his ear before looking at you, neither of you says anything, only staring at each other and listening to one another’s breathing through the phone. You can’t help but suddenly feel giddy, biting your lip slightly before chuckling, Jisung’s own chuckle following.

“We should probably go to bed…” You watch as Jisung leans forward resting his forehead on the window sill, sighing.

“Yeah.”

When he makes no effort to move, you laugh and says in a sing-song voice: “Goodnight, Jisung.”

He smiles warm heartedly before letting his soft voice transmit the words, “Goodnight, y/n.” Before you both hang up, he adds, “You turn off your light first.”

You do as he says and he bids you farewell before the line goes dead, you stare happily at your ceiling while giggling and smiling to yourself. And in the house across from yours, Jisung is no different, hugging his pillow close and trying to contain his giddy noises.

You both dream of each other that night.

You knew Jisung was cute, but you didn’t know he was this cute.

The realization comes 3 mornings after that night, the moment you step into Jisung car to go to school. He immediately shoved his phone in your face. You grow soft as you see the sight on his screen.

“I made us a playlist!” He says enthusiastically, “so we don’t have to listen to shitty radio every morning.”

The playlist was titled ‘y/n and jisung’s epic morning time playlist :D’, and it featured songs from all of your favorite artists.

“I put songs in it I thought you would like, or that made me think of you.” He pauses, his cheeks flushing as he recalls his last words. “A-and some songs that I like too.” He tries desperately to play it cool but ultimately fails. However, you think this is the cutest thing you’ve ever seen.

“That’s really sweet, Jisung. Let’s give it a listen.”

Neither of you talk for the rest of the drive to school, choosing to listen to Jisung’s playlist. Which is the only thing heard aside from the occasional hum or drum of Jisung’s fingers on the steering wheel.

Once you arrive, Jisung stops you from leaving by grabbing your hand. You turn around to see what’s wrong and sees the blushing face of Jisung who is currently avoiding your eyes.

“There’s a game today after school… do you maybe… wanna come? I mean, I know you never really go to these games but I thought maybe since we’re like friends now you might wanna come.” He rambles and you try your best to keep a straight face.

You watch him become nervous at your stoic expression before chuckling, as soon he looks up at you and sees you smiling face he relaxes. “Of course I’ll go, Jisung.”

“Really?” You nod, his smile grows and he’s suddenly leaning over the center console and kissing your cheek lightly, deeming it your turn to blush.

Jisung smiles smugly as he steps out of his car and walks towards the gates of the school, a pep in his step as he approaches the rest of the baseball team.

When you were making your way to the baseball field, you found yourself thinking that maybe coming here wasn’t the best idea. Considering how things went last time you were there and the fact that you and Jisung’s aren’t supposed to know each other in school.

But now… you couldn't be more glad you came. Not when Jisung is tearing it up on the field, running at the speed of light towards each base, you can practically see the passion and determination to become victorious that takes control of his body and plays vigorously.

He stands at the 3rd base, sweat dripping down his face, making way down his neck and pooling on the collar of his white uniform. His eyes are watching the player that’s about to bat. Slowly, he crouches slightly, putting his body in a position to run. And immediately after the sound of the ball hitting the metal bat rings through your ears he’s taking off at the speed of light towards home base, easily making it and leaving the opposing team’s players to huff frustratedly in the cloud of dirt that was left behind him. Jisung smiles smugly as everyone starts cheering for his home run. He knew they would never be able to catch him, not even in their dreams.

It’s kind of hot.

As he walks towards the dugout, his eyes trail over the expanse of the bleachers, searching. You allow yourself to hope that he’s searching for you just this once and wave your hand slightly as his eyes meet yours. His narrowed eyes fully open and a smile graces his pretty face as he raises his hand to wave back before quickly looking away and walking into the dugout, the smile you had caused remaining on his lips.

Jisung is staring at his reflection in the locker room mirror, ruffling his hair repeatedly, trying to get the perfect visual for you, when he feels a hand clap down on his shoulder. He recognizes it as Jeno almost immediately, he tenses up. “There’s party at Jessica’s house tonight, post game celebration, you coming?”

Jisung maps out all the different ways to say no and not get questioned. Looking back on it, maybe the one he went with wasn’t the best idea.

“I have... diarrhea.”

Jeno steps back, confused. “Diarrhea? You were just on the field!”

Oh shit oh shit oh shit, “It was one of those sudden ones, you know? Kinda snuck up on me.” He tries to laugh it off, but feels himself cringing. “Wh-”

“Its really bad so i gotta get home as soon as possible or im just going to shit… everywhere. So i gotta go,” he begins to make his descent to the entrance of the locker room, grabbing his gym back quickly before Jeno can question him further. “Bye!” he quickly slips out the door, leaving a suspicious Jeno in his wake.

“You told him that?” You say through your laughs, hand falling over mouth as you snort loudly at Jisung’s red face and embarrassed smile.

“I had no other choice! It was either that or get interrogated by Jeno for another hour.” Jisung can’t stop his own chuckle as he glances over momentarily to see hunched over, laughing loudly. He tries to conceal his laughter but eventually lets it out, “It is kind of funny…”

“Its hilarious!” Another snort leaves you and Jisung finally bursts out into loud laughter with you.

Your laughing fit lasts another few minutes and ends with the sound of your phone ringing. Your mother’s contact illuminates the screen, with laughter still evident on your voice you answer the call. “Hello?”

“Hi honey, how was the game?”

“It was good, we’re on our way home now.”

“Good, well, your father and I decided to go out tonight, you know… like on a little date.” You find it endearing that you’re mother still becomes flustered when talking about your dad as if they started dating yesterday. “So that means you’ll have the house all to yourself, is that okay?”

Your eyes travel to Jisung, an idea comes to your mind. “Yeah, mom. You guys have fun.” She laughs lightly on the other line saying she’ll make sure to before hanging up the phone.

As soon as you put your phone down, Jisung glances at you briefly before looking back at the road. “Was that your mom?” You hum in response.

“She told me her and my dad were going on a date,” He chuckles, “that means I’ll be alone tonight...” Jisung nods slowly, not getting the point. You sigh, wondering whether you should even bring it up or not. When you think about it, the thought of you and Jisung alone at your house was oddly… suggestive. Even though those weren’t your intentions at all, the possibility of Jisung thinking that you wanted to get with him made you nervous.

However, it seems Jisung had the same ideas as you because he’s suddenly taking a deep breath nervously drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. “You know if you don’t wanna be alone… we could hang out?”

You can tell he’s unsure and nervous and the fact makes you feel somewhat better. “You can come over to my house, it will just be us though, is that okay?”

Jisung turns red which causes you to also turn that shade of crimson but even then, he nods. “Yeah, that’s okay.”

Neither of you talk the rest of the way home, but the silence that surrounds you is comfortable, only serving to give your erratically beating hearts a break.

“Jojo!”

Your dog’s ears perk up as soon as she hears Jisung’s voice, quickly standing up to run at full speed past you towards the boy. Who crouches down and lets the dog lick his face excitedly, all while wagging its tail wildly.

“Jojo! What about me?”

Jisung laughs when Jojo completely ignores you to shower him with love. On the outside, you pout playfully at him but on the inside, your heart is doing somersaults at how cute the sight in front of you is. ...Also the way Jisung falls right back into his place of puzzle that is your life so perfectly it’s like he was never gone. He looks so at home in your house even if he has grown about 2 feet taller and gotten more mature throughout the years. He’s still the same piece that your puzzle has been missing to be complete.

He’s still the same.

Jisung notices that you’re deep in thought and walks towards you, also noticing how you smiled slightly. “Is something wrong?”

You shake your head quickly, smiling. It’s the kind of smile that never fails to make Jisung smile.

“Nothing at all.”

4 movies, a 2 hour long conversation and 3 tickle fights later, you and Jisung are hungry.

So you find yourselves in the kitchen, scavenging like racoons for anything you can find in the seemingly empty kitchen.

After 5 minutes of searching and moping and whining from Jisung about how he’s to die if he doesn’t eat right now, you open a cupboard to see what might’ve been the equivalent to gold for you two at this point.

Ramen.

Only problem was: it was on the very top shelf and way out of your arms reach. Still, you try and reach the packets of noodles searching your arm to painful heights with small grunts and frustrated groans leaving you every now and then. They are immediately halted by the feeling of a body against your back, towering over you and reaching above for the ramen packets, whipping them off the shelf with ease.

Jisung’s scent is surrounding you and overwhelming all your senses. When he doesn’t move away, you turn around to face him. You are so close you can feel his breath on your face and you can count every single one of his eyelashes. “Why didn’t you do that sooner?” You attempt to make the situation playful, but your low voice fails you. Jisung smiles slightly down at you before shrugging, “I wanted to watch you struggle for a bit.” His chuckles and flinches at you poke his side with your finger. His face settles into a soft smile as he looks down at you and you can feel yourself blushing.

Jisung walks closer and closer to you until your fully pressed against the counter, never taking his gaze off you. “What is it?” You question, flustered.

Suddenly, he raises his hands to cup the sides of your face and leans down to press a lingering kiss on your forehead before pulling away completely, turning to the stove and setting up the pot like nothing happened.

You watch incredulously as the boy calmly rips open the ramen packaging, setting the water to boil.

“What was that for?” You question the back of Jisung’s head, his neck is beet red as he shrugs his shoulders.

“I couldn’t…” He hesitates, before turning around slowly, his eyes are staring at the ground, avoiding your own, “I couldn’t let that moment of courage pass. I’ve always wanted to do that and I was afraid if I didn't do it then, I wouldn't do it ever.”

Forget somersaults, your heart is doing full on acrobatics.

Jisung looks up when you don’t reply, only to see you staring at him. He becomes increasingly more nervous under your gaze, that is until you find your words finally.

“I was thinking earlier about how crazy it is.”

“What?”

“You being in my house and looking like you never even left, how something’s really didn’t change…” you take small steps towards the tall boy, trapping him in between your body and the counter, as he had done to you earlier. “Yet others did.”

The words would’ve sounded bittersweet in any other context, but in that moment, Jisung understood exactly what you meant. He brings his hands up to cup your face once again, but instead of moving to kiss your forehead, he leans down further.

Jisung’s breath fans on your face and his hands move further into your hair, lacing through it as you two come closer. You can practically feel his lips on yours, his-

“Y/N?”

The two of you shoot apart quickly at the sound of your mother’s voice, Jisung turns to the stove where the ramen was currently boiling and you turn towards the counter and act busy with your phone.

That’s how you are when your parents walk into the room, shocked to see Jisung there with you. “Honey, you didn’t tell me Jisung was staying over tonight.”

“Yeah, I forgot, sorry.” You say, your eyes stilling training on the counter top, your mom seems to notice the tension in the air when she asks, “ did something happen while we were gone?”

You dare to look at Jisung, only to see the blushing boy already looking at you. He gives you a soft, knowing smile and you return it. Turning to your mother, you say, “Nope.”

Which ultimately translates to ‘definitely’.

Neither of you bring up the almost kiss you guys shared that night, but boy… did you think about it. While laying in bed, at baseball practice, during the morning car rides when you guys acted like you hadn’t basically confessed to each other just a few days ago.

It was the only thing on Jisung’s mind for the next few weeks, and he knew you were thinking about him too. From the way you would glance at him whenever you thought he wasn’t looking, to the silence that fell whenever you were deep in thought.

Even though your thought revolves around Jisung, the are much different than the ones in his head. While Jisung was thinking about how you made his life brighter once again, yours were filled with an overwhelming amount of questions.

What does this mean for the two of you?

Are you two going to date?

And if you do, will Jisung even allow you two to be seen out together?

Will you be able to be Jisung’s girlfriend, out in the open?

You remembered every time he had passed by you in the halls, as if you two hadn’t stayed up talking for hours the night before. As if you didn’t know each other. The thought of Jisung keeping you hidden from everyone forever scared you to no end.

Although you knew that you were in for this when you decided to give Jisung your trust once again, you wondered how long you could handle being hidden, and if it really affected Jisung as much as it did you.

You try desperately to settle your racing mind by telling yourself that you should just enjoy being with him for the time being, to appreciate the present instead of worrying about the future.

So you don’t worry when Jisung pushes past you in the halls with the rest of the baseball team and you don’t worry when Jisung trails behind you as walk down the sidewalk when he sees someone from school and you also don’t worry when Jisung tells you to just wait a bit longer.

But you should’ve been worrying.

You should’ve been worrying a lot.

A week later, Jisung tells you to come down to the locker rooms and wait for him there since practice was going to drag on a little longer than usual.

You do as he says and walk down towards the gym, a pep in your step at the thought of seeing the boy you haven’t had a moment with all day. You movements are halted suddenly as you hear the echo of Jeno’s voice through as you wait by the door of the locker room. Jisung’s familiar voice reaches your ears as well but you can’t really make out what he’s saying. Out of curiosity, you lean closer to the door.

You hear Jeno’s voice first.

“-That chick has been hanging around you a lot, recently. Are you guys a thing or something?”

You were aware you were ‘that chick’

Jisung freezes. “ What chick?”

“Y/N.”

You tense at the mention of your name, growing nervous at of the things they would say. “Oh…” you hear Jisung say, “Well, I already told you, my parents make me drive her to school.”

“But that doesn’t explain why you guys are always together, I see you after school at Billy’s, you know.” Jeno questions him with no mercy, causing Jisung to grow more and more nervous, racking his mind for any words to get himself out of the situation. “You know I would never date her, man.” He pauses, “I left her for a reason, my mom would kill me if I left her alone every day, she barely has any friends.”

You feel like you’ve been stepped on by Jisung’s shoe that he keeps twisting and stomping with you under until you’re nothing but dust scattered across the gym floor. “Good, cause that would be embarrassing, dude.”

“Yeah, totally, she’s nobody to me.” Replies Jisung.

Nobody to him runs towards the door gym entrance and keeps running until she reaches the school gates, desperate to get away from the boy who has successfully, once again, broken her heart.

The continuous vibrations of your phone cause a frustrated groan to come out of your body. You reach angrily into your bag and pull it out seeing the contact you had expected to see: Jisung. There’s plenty of texts from him too, asking where you were and telling you that you should probably go home since it’s late. You shut down your phone and shove it back in your bag, taking a deep breath before continuing your walk, despite the heaviness of your feet and the want to just lie on the ground and cry.

Why did he have to fuck everything up? Just when everything was so perfect? Just when things were getting back to normal, and you two shared the same heart you did 4 years ago, why did Jisung have to remind you of the harsh reality that he cares more about his stupid reputation than your feelings? Why was he such a coward?

So many thoughts run through your head that you don’t notice a car pulling up next to you until you hear a voice shout out: “There you are, I figured you left ‘cause I took too long at practice, hop in.” He unlocks his car and looks at you expectedly.

You ignore his words and keep walking forward, a new found determination to get away from Jisung and into the comfort of your room, where you can hide under your covers and never come out again. You hear his voice but are to focused on getting away from him to comprehend any of the words leaving him mouth.

That is, until he’s standing directly in front of you. “What’s up with you? Did something happen at school today?” Once he catches sight of your eyes, his widen in concern, hands immediately reaching up to grab your shoulders. “What’s wrong?”

You push his hands off your shoulders bitterly, “You don’t have to worry about waiting for me tomorrow morning or any day after that, I’m walking myself to school from now on.”

Jisung’s face contorts in panic and confusion at your words. “Woah, what?”

You make an attempt to walk past him, only for his hand to wrap around your wrist. You meet his desperate eyes with your own, “Y/N, just tell me what happened and… I’ll fix it, okay? Just tell what’s wrong.”

Your lip quivers as you stare at the boy across you. “I heard you, Jisung.”

“What?”

“When you were talking to Jeno earlier in the locker room, when you said I was nobody to you. I heard you.”

Jisung freezes and you watch as the confusion on his face is replaced with realization, and fear. His chest dips more as his breathing grows deeper. “Please…”

You yank your wrist out of his hand which remains suspended in the air between you in shock. “Please? Please what? Forgive you? Why did you say that, Jisung?” You run your hands through your hair in frustration before feeling your shoulders deflate. “I thought that maybe we had something… or that you liked me or whatever but I guess not-“

“I do like you. I do, but it’s… not that simple.” He avoids your eyes like the plague now.

“Why? Why is it not that simple?”

He breathes in deeply before carefully replying, “You know how it was back then… with the baseball team and the bullying. I don’t want to do that again, I’m… I’m sorry.”

He’s trying to tell that you bring him down. You bring your hands over your eyes to conceal the tears in them and turn away from the guilty boy. “Just let me go home.”

He grabs onto you once again and desperately pulls you against him, hugging you close to his body. “No. Please, I don’t want our friendship to end again. What we have right now is good, let’s just get in the car and we can go to Billy’s and I’ll buy you a milkshake and-“

You shove Jisung away from you and look him directly in his eyes that are filled with regret and fear. “I don’t want to get milkshakes with you! What we have isn’t good! I’m your secret! I’m like a guilty pleasure of yours and I don’t deserve that, Jisung.” Your lip quivers once again as Jisung nods at your words, hands reaching to grab your shoulders.

“I know that, it’s true. You don’t deserve anything I’ve put you through but please, don’t leave me, I’ll do anything.”

Your sadness is masked by a sudden surge of anger. Want to hurt him the same way he hurt you takes over you as you push his hands off you roughly. “There’s nothing you can do. You wanna know why? Because you’re a coward Jisung. And you have to realize that all your problems would be fixed if you would just grow a pair!” You breathe deeply as you watch Jisung’s face scrunch up at your words. “And this time, it’s me leaving you and it hurts, doesn’t it?”

Jisung watches in silence as you turn and walk around the block,out of his line of vision.

Once the door of your room slams behind you, you lock the door to prevent any questioning from your mother and immediately hide your body under the covers.

The sound of your soft sobbing flow travel through the space of your dark room. You take this time to let your brain tell your heart “I told you so!” And reprimand it for even thinking that things with Jisung would be any different because he brought you fucking soup.

You were so naive to even hope that he would give up his stupid reputation for you. That he would’ve said anything else to Jeno that day. That you thought he liked you enough to be able to put you first.

God you were so stupid and naive.

The frustration and sadness you felt was none like any other, you wanted nothing more than to rip every single one of your hairs and never leave your room again.

The only source of light into the room is your window, you frustratedly get up, throwing the covers off of you angrily and march towards the window. Once you reach it you catch a glance of Jisung sitting by his own bedroom window, leaning against the frame and looking outwards your house sadly. He perks up when he sees you at your window, he is hopeful. You falter but then remember what just earlier that day and make direct eye contact with him as you let the blinds fall over the window, plunging your room into complete darkness.

Never again.

The spot on the bleachers where you sat last time is empty, causing an angsty feeling to rise in Jisung’s chest. The kind he’s been getting a lot recently when he sees you leaving your house every morning without him, and type he gets when he sees you in the halls laughing with your friends, knowing that could’ve been him if he hadn’t been such a pussy.

The rowdy boys around him yell and stretch, prepping for the game ahead. However, Jisung can’t find it in himself to even move, staring at the dirt below his sneakers and ignoring anyone who tries to start a conversation ; his teammates’ confused stares going unnoticed by him.

As he stares at his feet, he catches sight off the worn down marker ink that you had drawn under his shoe, which you had written a few days before he joined the team, before he walked out of your life. You had been just as excited as him (maybe even a bit more) when he told you he was trying out for the team. He told you to write something that would give him strength on the field; you enthusiastically grabbed a marker and write on the side of his shoe:

“You’re going to do great today! You’re my favorite boy! <3”

He moves his foot to get a better view of it. A faint smile dusts on Jisung’s face, before immediately disappearing when he remembers what he did and that those days were no longer. Because he ruined it. Again.

“Alright boys! Showtime!” The Coach Suh’s loud voice causes the dugout to immediately grow silent as he begins to discuss strategies with the team, all the players listen attentively. Jisung tries his best to listen to the coach’s words but still can’t focus on anything but that damn empty seat.

As Jisung waits in the dugout from his turn to bat he is still not able to keep his mind off you. He keeps trying to focus on the game instead of you but it seems like Jeno has other plans.

Jisung feels Jeno tap his shoulder to get his attention, when Jisung faces him, he smiles smugly and leans back, crossing his arms. “You weren’t at the party last night, should’ve been.”

Jisung shrugs, “I wasn’t feeling it.” Jeno leans forward to whisper into Jisung’s ear.

“That y/n was there, I had to have a go.”

Jisung feels his blood run cold, nerves and new waves of angsty feelings rushing through him at the thought of you and another guy. Of you and Jeno. It can’t be true. You wouldn’t. “A go?”

“You know, like sex.” He replies easily, laughing. “She said she didn’t want it though. But they always say that, she’ll come around.”

Heavily breathing, Jisung questions, “What makes you so sure?”

“She’s a slut, Jisung. She’s always wanted to get with one of us. Why do you think she was after you? She’s just a lonely slut looking for some dick.”

Jisung knows better, he knows your likes and dislikes, she knows that you would never value sex over anything. He knows you’re not any of the things Jeno says you are. “That’s not true… she’s not a.. slut.”

Jeno scoffs before nudging Jisung slightly. “Come man, don’t be like that, I’m just saying the truth, she’s just a little whor-“

Jisung’s face flushes with anger and his hands begin to shake, before moving on their own and landing a punch on Jeno’s ill speaking lips, causing his head snap back at the force.

His fingers graze the fresh cut on his lip as he sends Jisung an incredulous look. “What the hell, Jisung?”

Jisung can’t believe he just did that, however, the adrenaline and anger provoked action felt amazing. Protecting and defending you felt amazing. And he’s not letting that go now.

It doesn’t feel that good when Jeno lands a punch on his face in return. It makes him dizzy for a second, the world spinning while he tries to recover from the blow the stronger boy has given him.

A sudden determination comes over him, and suddenly he’s straddling Jeno while landing punches on the boy’s already bleeding face, Jeno gets in his blows too. Busting Jisung’s lips and bruising his skin for sure.

It’s unknown to Jisung how long the fight lasts, or how long it takes for the coach to notice what was going on before he leaves the field and rushes into the dugout to stop the fight.

The Coach’s voice sounds distant to Jisung’s ears when he yells for the to break it up, like hes at the bottom of a swimming pool at a party, listening to the music, talking and laughing of the people above the surface. “Park, Lee! Break it up!”

The two boys are relentless, struggling against each other on the dirty ground of the dugout. One is battling for his own pride and image but the other battling for so much more: for the person he was, for the girl he left behind all because this toilet licking asshat baseball jock told him he wasn’t good enough.

This is it. Jeno can’t control him anymore.

Arms wrap around Jisung’s waist and pull him off of Jeno, who continues to glare and yell things at Jisung that he can’t make out as Coach Suh drags him out of the dugout away from Jisung. The person carrying him pushes him on to the bench of the dugout. His closest friend, Chenle, begins to speak.

“What the hell was that, man?” Chenle questions, looking at his best friend with a look that was both confused and concerned. Jisung feels the eyes of the entire baseball team on him. It makes him a bit uneasy but even then, he replies as calmly as he could.

“He was saying stuff about Y/N.” Chenle immediately calms, knowing the struggles his best friend has with the girl in question. However, another curious player makes his own question for the boy.

“Bro, why do you care? I thought your parents were making you babysit her?” He is taken aback by the reply he is given.

“I care because I’m in fucking love with her, man.” Jisung drops his head into his hands, not in shame, but in frustration. Because those words feel so good coming out of his mouth; so honest and pure. And he held back from saying them all these years due to his own cowardly mindset. He ruined all his chances to be with you and betrayed your trust beyond repair. Before he can stop them, tears flood his eyes and a sob claws its way up his throat.

The other players watch their teammate break down after proclaiming his love a girl in shock, standing still, not knowing what to do. Chenle is the first to react by approaching his friend, carefully saying: “You should take a shower to cool off, it’ll help you.”

Jisung nods weakly and lets his friend lead him to the locker room.

As he watches the distraught Jisung disappear into the locker room, another player goes on a guilt fueled search for Y/N.

The sound of your footsteps echo off the walls of the empty hallway, you’re absolutely positive all the students are at the game. You bitterly think of all the plans you and Jisung had made for this very day. How you guys would get milkshakes after they won, how after the season was over you were planning to tell Jisung how you felt and especially about how all those plans were crushed under the rough soul of Jisung’s playing shoes.

You sigh as you make your way towards the entrance, ready to curl up in bed and forget the world (something you have been getting exceptionally good at recently). When you figure out that -once again- the universe has different plans in store for you.

The universe comes in form of player number 13, Jaemin Na, clutching on your wrist and halting all of your movements. “Y/N?”

Once your mind registers the face in front of yours, you instantly rip your hand out of his grasp. “What do you want?”

Jaemin looks slightly defeated at the sound of your tone but tries his best to explain the situation. “Look, I know that I have been absolutely terrible to you throughout the years, i'm sorry about that and I understand if you don’t want to hear a single word i have to say but this is about Jisung.”

You ears practically perk up at the mention of his name and you grow concern as you ponder what it is Jaemin could be talking about. “What happened to Jisung?”

“There was a fight during the game today, Jisung was involved.”

“He was involved? Is he okay?” You don’t bother to hide the concern in your voice when you throw the questions at the boy in front of you.

“He’s fine, physically. But I think he needs you right now, Y/N.”

You look at the boy incredulously for a few seconds before looking down when you realize that he was serious about his words. You wrap your arms around yourself before shaking your head. “No… he can’t need me, he said I was nobody to him.”

Jaemin scoffs at walks closer to you making direct eye contact, “I don’t know what he said before, but the reason he got into a fight with Jeno was because he was saying some shit about you.”

“What?”

“And he just told the whole baseball team that he was in love with you.”

“WHAT?”

You try your best to process that information, staying silent while Jaemin stands anxiously in front of you.

“You love him too, Y/N.”

You stare at him while you think.

What if this ends up just like last time? With your heart in a million pieces all because of Jisung’s unhealthy concern over his reputation? But he said he loved you, and in front of the whole baseball team, apparently.

So what does this mean? What should you do? What if now Jisung is ready to be there for you like he couldn’t be before? Maybe you’ll get the happy ending 14 year old you always wanted…

“He needs you, y/n. Please.” Jaemin pleads, his eyes staring into yours and suddenly everything clicks.

He needs you. Like…really needs you. And before he was the boy who left you stranded and broke your heart, he was your best friend who was always there for you whenever you needed him.

You throw all selfish feelings to the wind and nod your head towards Jaemin, who sighs in relief.

You go to turn before stopping in your tracks and facing the baseball player, who looks at you with a confused expression. You smile softly at him, “I forgive you, Jaemin.”

You miss his teary smile as only seconds later your taking off down the hall in direction of the baseball field.

After asking around, you finally get the information that Jisung was currently in the locker room. Which you stand in front of, breathing in deeply before pushing open the door.

Most of the players have gone home, resulting in you being greeting with an empty locker room. The only sound is that of a single shower turned on and the silent sniffles of the boy you were searching for.

“Jisung?” You say hesitantly, taking small footsteps towards the showers. He doesn’t reply.

You knock softly on the shower door, “Jisung, it’s me. Are you okay?”

He sniffles once again, though this time, you can tell he’s trying to sound fine. “Yes.”

Not convinced, you say in a gentle tone: “Can you come out?”

It takes a few moments before you hear the stream of water silence and the towel hung up on the shower down disappears from your view. Then the door opens revealing Jisung, who’s hair is sleek against his forehead and his eyes are trained towards the floor. You can’t help but gasp as you see his face, cut and bruised, it makes your heart hurt. There’s nothing but a towel wrapped around his hips, which allow you a full view of his bruised torso.

You want nothing more than to take his face in your hands and somehow take all his pain away. “Jisung…”

“Hi.”

If you thought you had Jisung at his worst, you were wrong. Not only was he physically hurt. His eyes were bloodshot and his bony shoulders hang low from exhaustion. He looks so vulnerable, standing basically naked in front of you, looking like the world just betrayed him in the cruelest of ways.

You do the only thing you can think of doing. You reach forward and pull his body against yours, hugging him close.

It takes him some time for him to hug you back, but eventually his arms wrap around you slowly before they completely engulf you, pressing you harder against him. He lets the tears fall from his eyes and onto you shoulder, his body shaking with sobs.Your bodies slowly sink down until you’re both sat on the floor, his significantly larger frame fitting into your arms as you continue to hold him tight, letting him cry into your neck and chest. His large hands hold onto you, tightly gripping your clothes and bringing your body closer to him.

You stroke his hair in an attempt to calm him, gently telling him It’s okay, that you’ll be here until he’s okay. And to not worry, that you’re not going anywhere.

Your words make Jisung look up at you with blood shot eyes, sniffling softly. His eyes search yours for any hint of insincerity but all he finds is the comforting, caring gaze of his best friend. He smiles although ever so lightly. Your hands move to his face and you use your thumbs to wipe his tears away. You lean forward and press a soft kiss to his forehead.

“Let’s go home, okay?”

It isn’t until 3 days after you drop Jisung off at his house that afternoon that you finally see him again.

3 days of planning scenarios out in your head on how you would go about this moment when it finally arrived and pondering whether Jisung meant every word he said that day. If he’s finally ready and what that would mean for you two.

These led you to right now, laying in bed staring restlessly at the ceiling, when your phone suddenly illuminates, a loud ‘ding!’ sounding through the room. Before checking your phone, you look towards your bedside table where you alarm read in bright read letters: 2:56am.

Confused, you grab your phone to see who could be messaging you at the ungodly hour.

You gasp slightly and feel your heart rate pick up as you see the notification.

jisung park [2:54am]: come to your window.

You hesitate, wondering why he wanted to talk now of all times, but eventually find yourself slowly walking towards your bedroom window. Once you arrive, you see Jisung, who had been looking at your window expectedly only to nervously look away when you came into his line of vision. You can’t make out what expression he is wearing but you’re aware of his nervousness, that matches your own.

Jisung looks down at his lap, where his phone was, taking it into his hands and waving it slightly at you. You nod, and even though you were expecting his phone call you still startle when the ringtone blasts through the room. Jisung watches carefully as you pick up your phone, silent raising it to your ear.

The silent remains, the only noise present is the sound each other’s breathing through the phone. After some seconds, Jisung is the first to speak.

His soft voice sounds so hurt and broken in your ear, it takes you back to that time in the locker room when you held him in your arms as he cried, “Y/N…”

“Jisung,” you pause, “what are you doing up so late?”

He chuckles bitterly, wiping away a tear you hadn’t known was falling. “I couldn’t sleep, and I just… wanted to see you.” Jisung avoids your eyes, and picks sadly at the cracking paint of his window frame.

“Are you sure that’s the only reason?” You ask. Jisung finally looks at you, before slowly shaking his head.

He breathes in deeply and keep his eyes on yours. His gaze is intense enough to make you feel like he was in the same room and not in completely different houses.

“I’m sorry for what happened,” you grip your phone tighter at his words. “At the locker rooms that day and all those years ago when I told you I didn’t want to be friends anymore. I just… wanted to be on the baseball team so bad and I wanted to have this high school fantasy that I saw in all the movies and I let Jeno get into my fucking head, I believed him when he told me that the me I was then was worthless, and that I had to leave everything behind to be like him. I believed him like such a fucking pussy, y/n. And I hurt you. Over and over again because of my god forsaken reputation that he kept telling me I had to keep.” He raises his free hand in frustration, “and this reputation took so much out of me, it was like whenever I looked in the mirror I was this manufactured version of myself that I created just to satisfy Jeno and the rest of the man-eating toilet licking baseball jocks,” you chuckle softly as you recognize those words as your own, “and then you came back into my life… and at first I thought that I could do it, that I could keep this front up but I was wrong. Because the second you came back to me, I already felt like myself again. It was like an instinct to be my unfiltered self around you and it scared me so bad, y/n. It scared me because I liked being myself with you so much and I couldn’t hide it…” he breathes in, “so I allowed myself to keep you a secret, and to hurt you and treat like a guilty pleasure all because I wanted Jeno to think I was one of them. And now I realized that I don’t have to be like him or anything he wants me to be,” Jisung’s pleading gaze looking at you through your window and you realize that your own eyes are leaking tears on to your cheeks, which you brush away, “I just wanted to be yours, and I’m sorry that I didn’t put you first like I should have.”

When you don’t say anything he adds, “I’m sorry for ranting so much, I j-“ Jisung stops talking as he sees you shaking your head.

“Don’t be sorry, Jisung.” You take a minute to compose yourself. You take a minute to think if what you are gonna ask of him is even reasonable on any level, or if it even makes sense. Ultimately, you decide that nothing that has happened in the last 4 years has really made any sense at all, there was no use in trying now.

“Can you come over?”

You watch Jisung’s expression turn from anxious to shocked in a matter of seconds, “wh- now?”

You now assertedly, “Yes, now.”

Jisung ponders over it for a few seconds before nodding, “okay. Yeah.”

You hang up first and walk away from the window,.

You move towards your closet, taking out the box you had stored Jisung’s belongings in. You search for the worn down envelope you had stored all his letters in, you take out the one he had stored in your sweatshirt and run downstairs.

The desperate need to see Jisung overcomes you, your feet moving quickly towards your front door which you hastily rip open to reveal the face of the boy that occupies the majority of thoughts.

You catch of his open bedroom window behind him, and his disheveled hair, a clear indication that he snuck out that way. Your eyes widen, “Did you just jump off the roof your house?”

Jisung breathlessly looks back at his two story house and nods, “I guess I did,” He looks back at you, explaining, “It would've been too noisy to go out through the front door.”

His serious expression reminds you of why you called him here in the first place.

You hesitantly hold up the note to his face:

‘My y/n, please understand and please keep me as your favorite boy after this. I’m so sorry. When it’s time, please forgive me -Jisung’

He looks down in shame when he sees the note, the regret of his actions behind the note washing over him as soon as he finished reading it over. You shake your head at his actions and reach forward to grab his chin, stepping into his line of vision. Once you’re assured that you two are holding steady eye contact, you begin to speak. “Don’t feel bad, please. I brought this down here so you could see it and know that… I forgive you, Jisung. For everything. Now that i know why you did what you did, everything feels so much better. I thought that you had dropped me because you didn't want you me anymore and I was so scared and upset and I told myself I would never talk to you ever again. I told myself that I didn't need you. But I did. I still do.” You stop to collect your thoughts momentarily, “When you left there was a Jisung shaped hole in my life that couldn't be filled by anyone and when you came back, you fit right in like you had never left and everything was just so … perfect. It was like I was not really me while you were gone, it was so weird.”

Jisung nods, “I felt the same way.” This makes you smile, which makes him smile.

“I think that the reason I was able to keep up that front for so long, because we weren't together, I don’t know what it is but you are the best part of me, and without i felt like an… unfinished puzzle.”

He watches you nod eagerly as you agree, “Yes!”

You two stay in a comfortable silence for a few seconds before you’re stepping forward so that your faces where less than an inch away, Jisung looks down at you before smiling and wrapping you in his arms.

He feels emotional suddenly, the very fact that he has finally achieved the one thing he’s wanted for the past four years: your complete forgiveness. Jisung grips your clothing and pulls you closer, assuring that every part of your body is pressing against his. “I’m-“ he cuts himself off as he hesiatates, “I don’t know if this is too sudden or anything but I just- I wanted to- I- fuck-“

You can’t help but chuckle at his nervous stuttering, you pull away from your hug and look at the once again nervous boy. “What is it?”

Jisung breathes in, “The day you overheard Jeno and I had bought you this,” He shrug off the backpack you don’t notice he had on and reaches inside of it pull out what looked like an animatronic penguin holding a pink heart that read, ‘I love you’. “I was going to give to you that day and like confess? I guess, I didn’t know what you were gonna say when you told me to come over but I figured if I bought it I should give it to you.” His hand comes up to rub the back of his neck in a nervous habit. “I was going to tell you how I felt that day, but you know things didn’t go as planned that day. And if you don’t feel the same that’s totally fine, I just.. wanted you to have it.”

You breathe in to speak when you thought his rambling had come to an end but Jisung stops, he leans down quickly to set the penguin on the floor of you patio before pressing a button. Music plays from the toy as it cutely dances. “It… dances.”

Jisung is sweating. You almost feel bad for him. “I can see that.” You reply with a chuckle.

It dawns on you that there was nothing (nothing) more Jisung, than this.

There’s nothing more Jisung than him standing in front of you, sweating, confessing to you with an animatronic dancing penguin.

Nothing so Jisung, nothing so like the boy you love.

Suddenly, you’re stepping over the penguin separating you two, and closing all the distance between you and Jisung, crashing your lips onto his. It takes the shocked boy a few seconds to process the situation, before his hands are finding their place on either side of your face. The way he moves his lips against yours is clumsy, but it’s everything you could’ve ever imagined.

Jisung sighs, and you can tell it’s everything he’s ever wanted too. He attempts to pull you as close to him as physically possible, wanting nothing more than to be closer to you.

You pull away for air, but don’t move away from Jisung, who breathes deeply through his smiling, pink and swollen lips. He laughs breathlessly, “oh my god.”

His laughter produces a chuckle of your own. “What?”

He shakes his head, smiling. His forehead rubs against your as he does so, and his hair tickles your face. “I’m so in love with you.” He watches you with soft eyes.

You think that your heart is past the point of just bursting; it's like an atomic bomb that is capable of wiping out the entire population if Jisung didn’t stop being so damn cute.

You peck his lips softly before hugging him tight. “And I love you.”

And there you stay, until the sun rises and shines upon the two of you, whispering faint confessions of love to each other over and over while the penguin continues to sing It’s cheery tune next to you.

“What the f-“ your mother stops in her tracks as soon as she opens her front door to find you and Jisung asleep on the patio of her house, curled up to one another for warmth.

She looks around confusedly, wondering what the hell happened last night. But then she notices the way Jisung’s arm wraps around you tightly, keeping you close and the way you hands grip his clothes even while you sleep and she thinks she has an idea of what went on here last night.

After snapping a picture of you two to send to Jisung’s mother, she watches you and sighs, making eye contact with brightly colored penguin standing by her feet.

“What are we gonna do with them?”

[1 year later, Senior Prom]

“I still don’t get why we can’t just get ready together.”

You sigh as Jisung complains through the phone for what feels like the 100th time. “I already told you Jisung, I want you to be surprised when you see me! Remember that I’m not just your best friend anymore, I’m your girlfriend now, and I wanna look pretty for you.”

“You always look pretty to me.”

“I know! I just- It’s prom, okay? I want it to be perfect.”

“It will be, okay? Come to your window.”

You do as he says and peek through your window to see an extremely not ready looking Jisung through his window. “Jisung! Prom is in an hour!”

“I know. I just wanted to be alone with you for a bit before we have to spend the whole night with our friends.” He pauses, and points to the window frame recalling the memory of last fall when he did this exact same thing fri the first time, “it’s like we’re hanging out, isn’t it cool?”

You chuckle lightly, “Very funny.”

“Come on, y/n! Don’t you think I look better in my jersey anyway?” You take notice of the familiar jersey that is draped over his frame. It’s his baseball jersey that he never seems to take off ever since he was named Captain of the team when Jeno was kicked off last fall. And though he should be already wearing his tux, you’ll admit that the jersey does look a different kind of hot on him.

“It’s not that bad.”

He laughs at your comment and takes a breath to speak, before being interrupted by his mother coming into his room and yelling at him to hurry up and get ready. He sighs and tells her he’s on it. “I guess that’s my cue.”

“I’ve been telling you it’s your cue for the past 4 hours.” You say playfully, Jisung laughs. You watch him reach for his towel and throw it over his shoulder, waving at you through the window.

“I love you, babe.”

You smile when he says that, feeling like it’s the first time he’s ever said it. “I love you too, silly.”

“Ohhh, are you blushing? That’s so cute!” He coos point a finger at you through the window.

“Go get ready!” You say in stern yet playful voice as you attempt to conceal your flustered date from your boyfriend. He laughs and says he’s going before hanging up to phone and leaving you to finally get ready in peace.

“Woah.”

Is all Jisung can say when he finally sees you. You walk down the steps of your house to meet him at his car, the tail of your dress flowing behind as you approach him.

Now, Jisung always thought you were the most beautiful person in the world but… shit! You look so gorgeous. You give him chills.

“Jisung?”

He realizes he’s just been frozen this whole time, and finally takes action reaching into his car and bringing out the corsage he bought to match your dress. He puts it on you, and steps back to admire you. Jisung takes a deep breath through his mouth and leans back, dramatically. The dramatic action from your boyfriend causes you to laugh. “What?”

“You look like… ugh! You’re so beautiful.” He reaches forward and brings his hands to your face, bringing you closer and pecking your lips lightly as to not ruin your lipstick. You laugh and step back to admire your boyfriend.

His black tux suited him well, and his hand styled his hair up for the night, giving him a cooler and sharper look to the one you’re used to. You like it. You liked it a lot. “What about you? You look like a million bucks! All the girls are gonna be all over you.” You say it jokingly, but Jisung leans forward once again.

“Too bad I’m taken, and I’m whipped too so I wish them luck trying to get through to me.”

Yo laugh at his words and push his shoulder lightly. He smiles at you and attempts to wink, only fail miserably and a laughing fit to interrupt in between you two.

After posing for pictures at your mothers in front of your house for what feels like forever, you and Jisung finally arrive at prom. Jisung holds your hand as he walks in.

Chenle and Jaemin, two of his friends from the baseball team you had grown fond of, and Renjun find you guys first, immediately pulling you to the remotely empty dance floor. “Guys, no one is even dancing yet!” You exclaim, to which Chenle shrugs.

“Then let’s be the first!”

And so that how you spent the rest of your night between dancing with your own friends and Jisung’s friends you find yourself barely having any alone time with your boyfriend.

You search for him in the crowd as the announcer introduces the prom royalty competition, that is until his name is called out and he goes up to the stage to accept his crown. You watch confusedly and amusedly as Jisung awkwardly accepts his flowers and allows the women to put the crown on his head. You laugh as he meets your eyes, sending you an awkward smile.

“And the prom queen of the class of 2020 is…” she read the card and smiles brightly, “Y/N Y/LN!”

You freeze when you hear that. Jisung brightens up on stage, cheering. You stay in your spot until Renjun is ushering you to the stage to accept your crown. He helps you step onto the stage and you thank him, when you finally reach the stage, you (just as awkwardly as Jisung) accept your crown and bouquet.

People in the crowd cheer for their favorite couple when the announcer says it’s time for the king and queen to have a dance.

Thus you have your first dance with Jisung of the night. And the way Jisung is looking at you almost makes you forget that literally everyone staring at you right now. You smile and pull him closer. He chuckles, “This plastic crown really suits you, it brings out the color of your eyes.”

You snort as you two continue to sway gently side to side. “I know, it’s a good look.” You poke his own plastic accessory as he laughs.

You two dance in comfortable silence before Jisung says in a soft voice, “I’m like... really in love with you.”

You laugh bashfully before looking at your boyfriend. “I’m crazy in love with you too, Jisung Park.”

It dawns on Jisung how much he has changed in the past 5 years of his life. From your best friend, to the boy that broke your heart, to the baseball jock, then to the boy that broke your heart again and finally to your boyfriend. (He stills thinks about what happened with a heavy heart but knows that maybe things wouldn’t be the way they are now if they had never occurred.) He turned from a nervous kid who let his bully get the best of him to a bright young man who was willing to do anything for the girl in the pretty dress in front of him. He smiles as he realizes what he can do now that he had gotten over his fears.

“Watch this.”

You have no time to react as he suddenly grips your waist tighter and brings you closer so he could press his lips to yours. In front of all the people watching you, -which included teachers!- you hear Jaemin whistle and laughs into the kiss, causing Jisung to laugh as well. He pulls away.

“It feels so good that everyone knows you’re my girl.”

He then pulls you in for another kiss and another and another and another. He basically kisses you for the rest of the night and you can’t find anywhere in yourself to complain because you admit it also feels absolutely amazing to have everyone know Jisung is yours.

Now you know why everyone always said senior year is the best year of your life.

#nct dream scenarios #nct jisung #jisung park #nct dream jisung #nct imagines #nct fanfiction #nct angst #nct smut #nct fluff #xiaodejunletsact #nct #wayv scenarios #nct 127 #wayv #nct dream #nct mark

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barnesandrogersfanfics · 4 years

Text

Ocean Eyes - Part 5

To say i didn't get much sleep last night was an understatement! I had spent a couple hours on the phone to my mom telling her about Chris showing up and now knowing about Mason while having a couple glasses of wine. When i finally did go to bed i couldn't switch my brain off, the last time i had looked at the time it was nearly 4:30am and i knew Mason would be getting up around 6! It felt like i had just closed my eyes when that darling boy of mine came jumping on the bed to wake me up.

After breakfast we both got ready and headed out to the car, i needed to go to the store to get some groceries (if i had guests coming round i should really have something to offer them).

"Oh nooo.... mom creepy Brian is coming out" Mason said quietly.

"Sshhh i told you not to call him that" i chuckled as we rushed to get into the car before Brian could reach us.

"Thats what you and aunt Hannah call him though" he rolled his eyes like i was crazy as i reversed out of the drive.

"Only when we're inside where he can't hear us. You can't say that while his around baby"

"Fine, i wont say it again" he shrugged "is my dad coming back today?"

"He said he was gonna come see you today"

"I like him, he seems cool"

I didn't know what to say to that so i just kept my eyes on the road.

"Mom, dont you like my dad?...."

"Sure i do bud, i just haven't seen your dad in a long time"

"But he makes you sad"

"Im fine Mace, don't you worry" i forced a smiled trying to put on a brave face for him.

Walking around the store i found myself picking up things i knew Chris and Scott liked.... or at least what they used to like.

I was loading the bags into the car when i got a text message.

Chris: Hey, just checking its still okay if we come over today?

Y/N: Sure

Chris: Thats good because we're at the house but your not home....

Y/N: Im at the store, be back in 5 minutes

Chris: 👍🏻

A thumbs up?? Really Chris??

I internally face palmed, he was still a dork.

I spotted Chris's car parked out on the road leaving the drive way empty, once i had parked up he then drove up and parked behind me. Mason was already out the car and running over to see Chris before i even had my belt off!

I got out and walked around to the trunk to get the groceries out.

"Morning Neighbour" i heard Brian approaching.

"God damn it" i muttered under my breath before sticking my head around to see him "hi Brian"

"You need a hand with those bags Y/N?"

"No thanks i'm good, got plenty of help with these two" i threw a thumb back pointing towards Chris & Scott.

"You sure? i don't mind helping you out"

"Its fine, we've got it" Chris said coming to a stop beside me with Scott and Mason either side of him, he reached in and easily scooped up two bags, Scott grabbing the another.

"We're all good, thanks for the offer though"

"Anytime, you know where i am" he smiled and walked back to his house stopping a few times to look back.

"Urghh" i shivered "guy gives me the creeps" i muttered quietly as i shut the trunk and led the way up to the house.

"Is he always like that?" Scott asked his eyes going comically wide at the thought.

"Yeah. He always appears when we're leaving the house or getting back...."

"Thats a little weird"

"Im sure he's harmless...." i shrugged. Chris was being unusually quiet, I didn't ask him what his problem was.

"Mom and aunt Hannah call him creepy Brian but its a secret" Mason said quietly to Chris and Scott even though we were now safely inside.

"Mace, stop it" i laughed shaking my head.

"He can't hear me mom its fine"

"Honestly kid...."

"Wonder where he gets it from huh?" Scott chuckled at me.

"Definitely his dad" i rolled my eyes "i love him more than life itself but he's a pain my ass sometimes" i muttered quietly so Mason couldn't hear.

"Sounds just like Chris" Scott laughed playfully nudging my shoulder with his.

"I heard that!" Chris added just making Scott laugh louder.

I made some sandwiches for lunch and grabbed some drinks taking them all out into the garden where Chris and Scott were kicking a ball around with Mason.

"Foods ready guys" i called out to them once everything was laid out.

"Can i sit next to dad?" Mason asked running over.

"Sure bud, Scott looks like you stuck with me" i shrugged switching their plates around.

"Fine by me sweetheart, id rather sit next to you anyway"

"At least someone wants to sit with me" i joked sticking my tongue out at Mason making him giggle.

"Hey Y/N..?" I heard Brian call from behind me, i sighed closing my eyes before turning around to see him looking over the fence at us.

"Hey Brian, everything okay?"

"Oh yeah! I just wanted to remind you about the BBQ, your friends are more than welcome to join us too"

"Thanks for the invite Brian but i think we're just gonna have a quiet family lunch"

"Okay well if y'all change your mind just come on over"

"Will do" i forced a smiled and turned back around.

"Has he gone?" I whispered to Chris who had the clear view of next door.

"Yeah" he nodded "that guy needs to take a hint".

"I don't think he knows how to" i shook my head before taking a bite of my sandwich.

"Maybe you should give him a shot" Scott teased wiggling his eyebrows.

"No!" Both Chris and I said at the same time.

"Relax i was joking" Scott laughed before shooting Chris a look. Chris looked like he was about say something but his cell phone ringing his pocket drew his attention.

"Sorry i need to take this" he said getting up from the table "hey Lindsey" i heard him say as he walked further down the yard for some privacy.

"Lindsey? That the girlfriend?" I asked Scott quietly, he nodded giving me a sad smile "its fine, i just wondered"

"I don't think it'll last personally"

"He obviously feels differently if he's now wanting that divorce"

"Thats because he's an idiot"

"Not gonna argue with you on that....."

"So what about you? Anyone special in your life Y/N?"

"Yeah Mason" i scoffed "i don't have time for dating. Being a single parent is tough Scott.... most guys run a mile when they hear you have a kid..."

"But you must have dated a bit?"

"Not really" i shook my head feeling my face burn in embarrassment.

"Y/N, there has been someone since my brother right?"

I looked up at Scott slowly shaking my head "no. I've been on a couple dinner dates Hannah set me up on but nothing ever came of it" i shrugged "its fine".

"Jesus woman how long has it been....like 7 years??" He asked looking surprised.

"Something like that" i mumbled picking up my glass of water, my throat suddenly bone dry.

"Girl that is some dry spell, please tell me you at least have a vibrator!" He said quietly so Mason wouldn't hear. I choked on the water that i was swallowing and started coughing before it turned to laugher.

"God i've missed you Scott" i smiled at him.

"I've missed you too! But that doesn't answer my question".

"Whats so funny?" Chris asked as he rejoined us.

"Just Scott being Scott" i rolled my eyes.

"Im finished mom can we go play football again now?" Mason asked looking hopeful.

"In a little bit bud, your dad and Scott are still eating".

Hannah and Lucas turned up unannounced not long after lunch was finished and I was grateful for the distraction. Lucas quickly joined in with Mason, Chris and Scott who were kicking the ball around again while Hannah poured us both a glass of wine.

"So hows it been having him around again?" She asked looking over at Chris.

"Weird. But Mason loves it"

"Your handling it better than i would be!"

"Mason deserves to know his dad, Chris has already been warned that i'll kill him if he does anything to upset him"

"I don't doubt that for a second" she laughed refilling our glasses.

"So..... Friday? I was thinking we start small just hitting some bars then we can end the night at 'Ruby's' for some dancing. I know you need to be wasted before you even consider dancing"

"Han i said id go out for a few drinks not an all nighter!"

"Oh come on! You haven't had a good night out in forever babe, we'll find us some cute guys...."

"Hannah...." i groaned closing my eyes.

"Ooh i heard you mention cute guys" Scott sat down looking very interested in our conversation.

"Im trying to talk Y/N into finding a cute guy to give her some much needed attention when we go out Friday" Hannah told Scott making me roll my eyes.

"Id listen to Hannah, you are in some serious need of male attention"

"But i don't just hook up with strangers guys.... we've talked about this!"

"Well maybe you should! Im just saying you deserve to find someone who makes you happy Y/N. Just because your a mom now doesn't mean you can't find love" Hannah said reaching over taking my hand with a smile. She had a point.... i couldn't sit around waiting for a man who had made his feelings perfectly clear 7 years ago. A man who was in a serious relationship..... maybe it was time to try and move on from him.

"Can i please come with you? I could use a night out" Scott asked looking hopeful.

"Sure, its been a while since you joined us on a night out Scotty" i smiled at him.

"You can help me find this one a man while your at it" Hannah smirked and shared a look with Scott that spelt nothing but trouble.

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit @rynabarnesrogers-reading @rainbowkisses31 @rororo06 @supernaturalwintersoldier

Ocean eyes: @supraveng @michelehansel @denisemarieangelina @mrsjeffwittek @mery-be @marvelfansworld @cmalass @capstopavenger @fallenoutofrose @kelbabyblue @biebsmylife95 @loser-alert @traceyaudette @w3lissax @jennmurawski13 @ford66steal @saiyanprincessswanie

#chris evans #reader insert #steve rogers #steve x reader #chris evans x reader #ocean eyes

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sexy-monster-fucker · 4 years

Text

Selfish

Eddie Brock/Venom x Reader ANGST

requested by anon: imagine a scenario where Eddie and reader (they’re dating) get into a fight or argument but VENOM doesn’t give a shit about the fight and misses his morsel and is bothering Eddie to talk to him/her to makeup... maybe some angsty sexy longing in there, maybe Venom takes the drivers seat to be with his morsel because the fighting is trivial human shit he could care less for... 💕

requested by anon: Do you do angsty stuff? Like maybe Eddie and reader get into a bad fight and break up and neither one of them stop to think how Venom feels.

requested by anon: Howdy, just wanted to say I love your blog! Also I appreciate a good angsty fic, you're definitely not alone. Hope you had a good Halloween!

“Don’t pretend like this is okay,” Eddie slammed the door behind him...

You had just got back from your monthly office party. Your boss thought it was good bonding for everyone to get together once a month. You found it repetitive and ridiculous. Tonight had been different though. Eddie came for the first time ever, but things at the party were different. One of your coworkers had shown up wasted, “An embarrassment to the company,” you had thought. He was stumbling around, grabbing every girl in sight. He just happened to come up to you and attempt to grope you. He grabbed a handful of you from behind, causing you to jump. “N-Nice ass,” he burped out. “What the fuck,” Eddie raised his voice. “Wh-What’s your pro-problem, dude? She’s just some chick, don’t take it so personal,” he pointed in Eddie’s face. Eddie gritted his teeth, “She’s my girlfriend. And I suggest you step away from her.” You grabbed Eddie’s hand, “C’mon, Eds. He isn’t worth it.” Your co-worker pushed Eddie back, “Oh yeah? What are you gonna do-do about it, b-bub?” Eddie’s eyes went white; Venom was trying to take over. You grabbed Eddie and pulled him back, “Ed! No!” He turned to see you scared. He knew he needn’t handle things the way he wanted. He gave his attention back to your co-worker, “You got lucky this time, but it you ever try something like that with my lady again, you’ll pay.” You and Eddie began walking away when your co-worker began laughing, “What a pussy. His girlfriend convinced him he shouldn’t fight? Nah, he’s just scared-scared he’d loose.” Eddie stiffened up. You placed a hand on his bicep, “Eddie, he’s drunk. Don’t.” Eddie pulled away from your grasp and walked over to him. Eddie lifted him off he ground by his collar with one hand. Venom’s growl escaped Eddie mouth, “I won’t warn you again, insect.” You pulled Eddie away and your co-worker hit the ground. “Wh-what the hell has that guy been eating,” he muttered under his breath. Everyone in the room stared at you and Eddie. Eddie looked angry. You were embarrassed. You ran out, Eddie chased behind you.

...You held yourself tightly. Eddie had embarrassed you in front of your co-workers. You knew he was just protecting you, but he did not have to take it so far. “You’re really going to act like that guy didn’t make a pass at you,” Eddie yelled in anger. “Please stop yelling,” you whispered. Eddie blew his breath out. “Oh? Is that how it is? Just normal? You’re not even upset,” Eddie’s voice cracked. You placed your hand over your mouth. “Whatever,” Eddie scoffed, “Just pretend like it didn’t happen. I wouldn’t expect you to be upset anyway. You never are unless I am the one who messed up.” You turned and felt warm tears falling from your eyes. You had a lump in your throat, “OF COURSE I AM UPSET, EDDIE!” Eddie’s expression changed quickly when you raised your voice. “I can’t keep doing this, Ed. You know it upset me! But you didn’t have top flip out so immaturely! No woman wants to be groped by some drunk guy! I could loose my job over how you acted! You embarrassed me!” Eddie was silent. He stared at you while you cried. He did not know what do to. He was still so angry, but he knew he had hurt you. “I-I’m sorry, Y/N,” Eddie whispered. You were frustrated, “YOU ALWAYS ARE! Maybe if you’d think for five seconds before acting you wouldn’t have to be sorry all the time!” You could feel your heartbeat in your ears. You were beyond angry. Eddie stood in front of you, a frown painted on his face. “I’m leaving, Eddie. We need some time apart,” you stated walking past him. Eddie went to grab you and you pulled away, “No, Eddie. We can’t keep fighting all the time. I need a break.” You walked out.

Eddie began crying. “Oh my God, what have I done,” he held his face in his hands. Venom appeared next to Eddie. He was confused. Not completely understanding where you had went and why you had left. “Ed, what happened? Where did our princess go,” Venom questioned. Eddie leaned against the door, slowly sliding down it until he sat on the floor. “She broke up with me,” Eddie whispered. Venom did not understand, “What does that even mean?” Eddie blew his breath out, “She decided she did not want to be my partner anymore, V. She is no longer a part of our life. And it’s all my fault.” Venom snarled. He was angry that Eddie had made such a foolish mistake. “What’s wrong with you? Why would you do that,” Venom hissed at Eddie. “Listen, Venom. These kinds of things happen. People break up. Trust me, this hurts me a hell of a lot more than it hurts you,” Eddie was cold in his words. Venom growled at Eddie, “You are going to get her back!” Eddie rolled his eyes, “Don’t be an idiot.” Venom pulled Eddie up to his feet. He made Eddie’s hand grip the doorknob. “NO,” Eddie argued. “YOU! ARE! GOING,” Venom demanded, causing Eddie to open the door. Eddie was angry, yet relieved.

You stood outside in the cold. You were waiting on a cab. You heard someone approaching you from behind. You knew it was Eddie, “Listen, Ed, I’m not-” It wasn’t him. It was simply another attendee at the apartment. The man gave you an odd look because you had spoken to him. He continued on across the road. You were disappointed it hadn’t been Eddie. You would not admit it, but you wanted Eddie to come chasing after you. It was childish and immature. You should have just worked things out like adults.

“I can’t, Venom,” Eddie argued with the beast. Venom was getting desperate and threw Eddie out into the hallway. Eddie slammed into the wall, falling. Eddie groaned in pain while he tried to force himself back up. “She is going to be gone soon,” Venom panted. Eddie rose, “I don’t see why it matters so much to you.” Venom’s tone changed, “I love her, Eds. She means the world to me. I feel so attached to her. She can’t just leave us. I want her back, Eddie. And you did not even put up a fight when she tried to leave. I can’t go get her on my own. Eddie, please.” He was sincere. For once, the monster had human emotions. Eddie could feel how real his feelings were and he began to feel them too. Eddie had been fighting his feelings for months. He continued to push them and you away out of fear of him not being good enough. He knew he loved you. Loved you more than he had ever loved anyone. He had no idea how to tell you. He was scared it would scare you. Scared it would seem too soon in your eyes. “I’m sorry, V. I didn’t even think about how this would affect you,” Eddie apologized. “Edster,” Venom began, “You can make it up to me by getting that girl.” Eddie smiled at Venom. Eddie began to rush down the stairs.

You began to shiver. It was getting colder and there was no cab in sight. You heard another set of steps begin behind you. You turned to see Eddie rushing towards you. You could not help but smile, “Eddie!” He smiled when he saw you, “I came down here to tell you how sorry I am. You have no idea how much you mean to me. Seeing that guy all over you just set me off. I am so so sorry. You mean the entire world to me.” You shook your head, “It’s okay, Eddie. I was being dramatic leaving like that.” Eddie pulled you into his embrace, “I love you, Y/N.” You froze. “Did you just say you loved me,” you whispered. Eddie nodded. You felt your cheeks turn pink, “I love you too.” Eddie giggled and picked you up. He spun you around and placed a kiss on your lips.

“Let’s go back to my place, you have to be freezing,” Eddie took your hand in his. You smiled and walked back to Eddie’s apartment with him.

~~~

End

[Tags]

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\ If you no longer want to be tagged in my Venom x Reader Fics, please do let me know. Or if you would like to be tagged in future posts, let me know! //

#venom #venom x reader #eddie brock x reader #angst #tags #tom hardy #eddie brock #fanfic

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jjmaybanksblog · 4 years

Note

can you do prompt 28 and 33 with Kie please from prompt list one?

My Hero- Kiara Carrera

Summary: Kie takes you out of the house after you've been studying, making sure this is a night to ease your mind.

Word count: 1,347

Warnings: cursing

Prompts:

33. “Shut up and kiss me, you idiot.”

28. “Apparently all our friends have a bet going that we end up together.”

You chewed lightly on the end of a pencil as you skimmed through pages and pages of notes. Letting out a helpless sigh, you threw your head back, your hair spreading against your shoulder blades and back area.

Shutting your eyes, you attempted to get rid of the mild headache you received from all these words that you had no fucking clue what they meant.

A soft 'thumping' sound came from your window, you hopped off your bed and went to see what the noise was. Low and behold, there was your best friend since 3rd grade, Kiara Carrera.

She was casually standing outside your window, hand carrying a back of snacks. You laughed to yourself quietly as you unlatched the window.

"Hi beautiful!" Kie greeted you. Rising on your tiptoes, you welcomed your best friend with a hug. Your arms made their way around her neck, her arms enveloping your waist. She gently rested her chin on the top of your head, enjoying the smell of the lavender shampoo.

As the two let go, Kie noticed the scattered papers and tossed notebook sheets on her bed. "Y/N. Why are you doing homework? On a Saturday night?" Kie sounded disgusted as you rolled your eyes jokingly.

"Because I have a human anatomy test on Monday and if I don't study im screwed because I have no clue what the fuck im doing. My mom is out with her boyfriend and my brother just left without saying anything and I just got bored." You spoke without breathing in between words.

"Okay, how about this. I help you study for 10, 20 minutes, then I get to take you out somewhere." Kie bargained, running a hand through her luscious hair, her other hand lightly cupping your face.

You tugged your bottom lip between your teeth, causing Kie's eyes to stare at them. "Fine." She pumped her fist in the air, jumping a few inches and landed on your bed, crumpling quite a few of the papers.

________________________________

"Which one is this?" Kie asked you, pointing to a blank diagram on a paper. "That's the...fuck." You sighed once more, cupping your face in your hands. "I'm sorry it is not 'fuck' Ms. Y/L/N." "Kie, it's not funny. I'm so gonna fail."

Kie gently grasped her hands around your wrists and pulled them back. Curving her hands to fit into yours, she gently rubbed her thumb against your knuckles.

"Hey, princess don't say that. You're gonna be fine, you're gonna pass this test with an easy A." You looked down at your intertwined hands, feeling a wave of heat rush over your face.

She released one of your hands, still gripping onto your right one. "Now, Y/F/N Y/L/N, I am here to take my best friend out on an adventure, and not watch you suffer as you study for a human anatomy test."

You rolled your eyes as you watched Kie smirk in amusement "Kiara Carrera, you are my hero."

The two best friends left your house through your window, still hand in hand as they ran to Kiara's car. Kie had opened the passengers side for you, gesturing for you to get in. The two drove to a hill that gave them a perfect view of the town of Outer Banks, North Carolina.

Kie had pulled out a blanket from her backseat and rested it upon the hood of her car. You sat on the hood, admiring the view, the sound of wind slowly blowing, the crickets that laid in the trees that surrounded you two.

Your thoughts protruded from school, to your family, to her feelings for your best friend. You knew it wasn't right, that it shouldn't be on your mind, but something was just there. You didn't know how to describe it, but you knew that it couldn't be good. Pulling your knees up to your chest, you rested your head on your knee caps.

Kie could feel your sad demeanor, scooting towards you she wrapped an arm around your body, lightly pulling you close to her. You unravelled and leaned into her chest, hearing her faint heartbeat.

The two laid down, resting now on the windshield and the hood. Kie let out a small laugh, you turned to her, "hmm?" "Apparently all our friends have a bet going that we end up together.” Your mouth fell open in the slightest way. "I'm sorry, what?"

She nodded her head, "Yup, I was talking to the guys and they asked me how you were doing and I kinda just rambled on about you. I talked about you for like half an hour apparently…" she trailed off, her cheeks turning pink as she admitted it. "What did you say about me?" You asked, your voice above a whisper as you faced her.

Kie faced you, picking at her nails as she suddenly got a rush of nerves running through her body. "Well at first it was just like a simple conversation, but then I kinda just started talking about small details about you." You furrowed your eyebrows, as if asking what she meant. She took a deep breath as she finally looked up at you.

"I started talking about the freckles on your cheek that form a little triangle. And how when you smile you have the crinkles that show around your eyes. And when in normal lighting your eyes look like a completely different color than in shadows. Or the adorable little snort you sometimes make when you laugh too hard. How sometimes when you get nervous you'll crack your knuckles or tuck a piece of hair behind your ear. Or when we hug or cuddle I can hear your heartbeat speed up a little bit and then I get nervous because I think that's really cute. Or how when you wear a bikini when we're surfing you tend to try to hide your body, which I don't understand because everything about you is beautiful. And sometimes when you wear that shiny lip gloss I can't help but look at your lips and just wonder what it'd be like to kiss you…"

You sat there like a deer caught in headlights as you listened to all the things she listed about you. She never broke eye contact once as she spoke which only ignited your feelings for her even more. As if Kie was snapped back to reality, she quickly shook her head. "I'm… I'm sorry that was a lot and I understand if that made you uncomfortable but I-" you interrupted her, "shut up and kiss me, you idiot."

Kie grinned brightly at your words, leaning in towards you. She hovered over your lips for a second, her breath fanning over your skin. "Are you sure?" She asked. She wanted to tease you, but also make sure you didn't feel forced to. "A hundred percent." You mumbled before pushing forward to meet her in the middle.

Your body got chills at the feeling of her soft lips on yours, it was a feeling you've always wanted to know and now you were finally able to experience it. Kiara's hand reached up and cupped the side of your face, her thumb rubbing your cheek bone. Your hand held onto her wrist to hold it in place, as you two kissed.

You pulled apart, resting your forehead against hers. Grabbing hold of her hand that held your face, you pressed a delicate kiss to her knuckles. "I really like you Y/N." Kiara admitted, catching her breath from the long kiss. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear that." You giggled, leaning back from her.

"You know we can't tell the guys right? I don't want to give them the satisfaction." You laughed at her words but whole heartedly agreed with them. Kie wrapped her arm around your shoulder again and pulled you into her chest. You pressed a kiss to her jawline before closing your eyes, adoring the peacefulness you got when you were around Kiara Carrera.

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rocketmanmadden · 5 years

Text

Water Park

Requested by @primaba11erina

Taron Egerton Imagine where he and the reader spend the day at a water park with his mom and sisters? Do whatever with the rest. Make it super fluffy and cute

So here’s my first fic I’m posting on here!

A/N- 1, I literally suck at titles I’m sorry. 2, I have to confess I’ve never actually been to a water park of down a water slide so this request was a little challenging to write. I know a water slide is pretty self explanatory but I kinda had to just use imagination so I hope it’s not to bad!

“How much longer until we’re there!” Taron whines out as you and his family are driving to a water park, which happens to be one of his favorite places

“Taron David Egerton if you ask one more time how much longer until we are there you aren’t coming next time”, his mother laughs, and let’s face it, so do you.

“But Mari got to ask!”

“Mari asked once Taron, you asked four times.”, His mother replies.

“Not to mention Mari’s also a child T”, you chime in

“I’m sorry, I’m just very excited. Plus Y/N, you’ve never been here before, im excited for you too. It will all be new for you. As you know this is one of my favorite-“ he cuts himself off “ we’re here now, let’s go!” He says practically jumping out of the car.

“You’re too smart for him Y/N, he acts younger than me!” His younger sister tells you

“It’s part of why I love him. He’s never lost the childhood magic, I think it’s quite cute” you tell her with a smile

You look up from his sister to see Taron almost at the entrance already.

“Are you guys coming? Hurry up slow pokes, I wanna go in!” You hear him yell from afar, causing you to hurry up for him and run to the entrance.

You guys make your way into the park and get you swimsuits on, holding Taron’s hand as your now walking through looking at all the water slides.

“This is great. So great. A lot of the water slides you can do with a partner and I’ve never had anyone to do the big ones with because my sisters are to small for them and my mum can’t leave them alone to do it with me-“

“Taron..” you try to cut him off but he keeps going on

“But now that you're here I have a partner and we can do them together!”

“ Taron… I have something to tell you”

“Yeah?” He smiles

“I- uh. I have a terrible fear of heights and those all look terrifying”

He laughs like it’s the funniest thing in the world until he sees your not joking

“Love, they aren’t that bad” he wraps his arms around you, noticing you look scared and pulls you into a hug

“What if it breaks and I die”

“Then I die with you, considering we’re riding it together and I will be holding you the entire time. Please Y/N/N. For me? Just one and if you hate it, never again will we go on it.”

You see the sadness in his eyes and you just can’t say no. You can never say no to his puppy dog eyes. He was so excited to take you here and you can’t let him down like that

“Okay” you say with a shaky voice, “ I’ll do it, but please don’t let go of-“ he cuts you off with a kiss

“I would never even think of letting go of you.” He looks over at his mum and sisters, the expression on his face looking like he just won the lottery.

“Did you guys hear that! She’ll ride it with me! I mean she’s terrified, but she’s gonna do it!”

“That’s great Taron” his mom smiles

“Great? It’s awesome!” Taron exclaims

“You’re the only person in the world I’d do it for” you tell him

“Well, what are we waiting for! Let’s go before the line gets any longer!”

“Good luck!” His family calls out to you

You wait in line for about 45 minutes, but it felt way faster than that. Before you knew it, there were only two more sets of people in front of you. Taron could see how scared you were and he was being so encouraging. The last 45 minutes have been filled with hugs, kisses, and many

“You’re gonna do great love”

“I’m telling you, you’ll enjoy this sweetie. Even if you have to close your eyes”

“You know I love you so much and I would never let go or let you get hurt”

You snap out of your thoughts when you hear Taron say

“We’re up. You ready love?”

“As ready as I can be” you force a smile even though you want to cry

You sit down in the front, with Taron sat behind you, wrapping his arms around you

“This looks a lot higher up when you're actually looking down” you say feeling a panic rush over you

“ I know, but we have to go down now sweetie. Close your eyes, I got you.”

Before you could even respond, you guys were already going down, Taron screaming sounds of fun, you screaming like you’re gonna die”

“Taron I swear to god if you let go of me” you scream

“I’m not!” He screams back

About a minute goes by and you feel yourself slow down

“Y/N?” He asked

“We feel stopped, are we stopped? Can I open my eyes now?”

He laughs, “Yes dear, the ride is over. I see my mum waiting by the exit. That wasn’t that bad was it?” He says as you two start standing up and walking towards his family

“Okay, no it wasn’t that bad. Terrified to do it again? Yes. But would I do it again for you? Yeah I would” you smile at him “Sorry I acted like a baby, thank you for holding me”

“You weren't acting like a baby, you were scared and I’m proud that you gave it a try for me. Thank you, it means a lot.

“God do I love you T” you say as he wraps his arm around your shoulder as you exit the gate

“You made it Y/N! Your alive!” You hear a little voice call out

“Mari!” You excitedly say “ I did make it, all thanks to Taron for protecting me along the way”

“I think we should get some ice cream now! I rode plenty of slides while you guys waited for the scary one”

“I agree with that” Taron says

“Ice cream it is then!” His mum say

“Hey Y/N” Taron says

“Yes dear?”

“Race you there!” He says picking up Mari and starts running to the shop

“After all these years he’s never lost the magic of playing around like a child” his mum says to you

“And I hope he never does” you reply before chasing after him into the ice cream shop

After a long day of taking risks and trying new things, the rest of the night went by filled with cuddles from Taron and his sisters, plenty of ice cream, and lots of new memories.

The car ride home was were the excitement started to come to an end. The sky was dark and his sisters were asleep, you and Taron about to do the same.

“Taron?”

“Mhm?” He says sleepily

“Thank you for taking me here today, I get why you love it so much. It made me feel like a little kid again.”

“I love it almost as much as I love you” he says. “And sleep, which I think I’m gonna” his eyes fluttering shut

You let out a light laugh, “goodnight honey. I love you” You say before closing your own eyes to try and sleep

“I love you more” he mumbled out before falling asleep, you doing the same not long after.

#taron egerton x reader #taron #taron egerton #taron egerton fic #taron egerton imagine #taron egerton fanfiction

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mitchsmarners · 6 years

Note

hc where Richie’s jokes suddenly turn super depressing and self-deprecating and the losers don’t understand what was going on until it’s too late ( it’s a failed attempt. no richie death)

i skipped over that first part somehow and ended up with this i don’t know. also you didn’t specify a ship so i did established canon reddie and really strong plot significant platonic stozier

Triggers: drug abuse, suicide attempt (as mentioned in the ask itself), so much angst, hurt/comfort

Something had been wrong with Richie for awhile. Eddie had definitely noticed him seeing withdrawn and distant. Maybe that wasn’t even the right words for it. Richie was still there, as much as always. Always right by his side, pressing up against him, still coming in through window and cuddling up him to sleep. But Richie was awake when Eddie finally drifted off and gone when Eddie woke up.

Eddie’s usually touchy, loving and- frankly- horny boyfriend seemed to have slipped away. While Richie would never pull his hand away if Eddie went to hold it, or refuse a hug, or reject a kiss… something was still off. Richie didn’t make the move anymore and he always pulled back.

Mike had even brought up the behavioural changes in Richie to Eddie one afternoon when Eddie went over to help feed the chickens. Commenting on how Richie had toned down at lot, gotten quiet, was making less inappropriate jokes had almost disappeared.

So Eddie started watching for that, too, and Mike was right. Jokes that might once have ended with “Eddie’s mom” or “Bowers’ ugly face” turned into jokes about himself. And Eddie didn’t fucking like it but he didn’t know what to do about it, either.

Everything fell apart at a party, as things are tended to do

Things had been fine, Eddie didn’t get it. He couldn’t figure it out but suddenly his boyfriend was plopping down in his face and Eddie just knew something was wrong.

Richie was too warm, way too warm. He was burning up to the touch everywhere his skin touched Eddie’s. Eddie had on edge about Richie for a few weeks now, there had been a change in him that Eddie had tried to just put out his mind.

Richie’s jokes had gotten a dark twist to them, and turned much more inwards. It seemed like more personal attacks on himself than they used to be, no more jokes about people’s moms or borderline offensive shit that made you cover your mouth so nobody would see you laughing.

But now Richie was nosing into Eddie’s skin and he was so hot. It burned and Eddie’s stomach flipped over.

“hey, baby, do you feel okay?”

Richie nuzzled closer to Eddie, while Eddie pets at Richie’s damp curls

“Eddie, I love you. I love you, Eddie.”

“I love you, too, Richie. Are you sure you’re okay, you’re scaring me.”

Beverly stood then and mouthed something about going to get Bill, their designated driver of the night. Eddie couldn’t really care about that right now, he suddenly felt cold stone sober

Richie pulled back and his eyes were out of focus and he kept wincing in pain. His hand rubbed against his chest like it was aching.

“Where’s Stan?” he asked suddenly, looking around seemingly lost. “I need Stanley.”

Richie slipped out of Eddie’s lap and rolled himself onto the floor.

“Rich, Rich, baby, what’s happening?”

“I need Stanley. Where is he? I’m dying, where is Stan?”

“What do you mean you’re dying? Rich? Richie?”

….

“RICHIE!”

Beverly and Bill came rushing into area as Eddie was running his hands over Richie’s back as Richie was shaking on the floor and making small whining noises

“we need to get him to the hospital” bill says immediately, just taking one look at his sweaty, pale, shaking form. eddie looks at him in utter panic. “what did he take?” bill asked him harshly.

eddie shook his head. “i dont know i lost track of him a while ago. he usually knows his limit so much better. he said he’s dying, bill, what even.”

beverly was taking eddie off the ground and guided him away, mike and ben seeming appearing out of thin air to help bill pull richie up

“i need stan, where’s stan, i need stan, where is he”

Stan, of course, isn’t there. Stan had to have family time that night of all nights. Eddie bit down on his knuckles as he watched his friends half dragging, half carrying his boyfriend out to bill’s car.

eddie ended up with richie laying on him in the backseat. he runs his fingers through richie’s hair while richie keeps muttering to eddie about how much he loved him. the whispers and mutterings trailed off mid-sentence and the anixety in eddie’s chest jumped straight up to twelve.

“bill fucking drive faster i swear to fucking god if he dies i’ll fucking kill you with my bare hands”

(bill decided to just let that go)

several moments were a daze as they tried to get richie checked into the hospital and get ahold of wentworth and maggie and just try to figure it out before eddie’s stomach dropped more

“we need to get a hold of stan” he moves back towards the phone.

they called the urises five times with no answer and eddie was crying again as he sat down and curled up to bill’s side. it was less than fifteen minutes before wentworth and maggie came rushing in and we ushered to talk to the doctors.

wentworth was the one who came out and told them the news, as gently as he could. what it seems liked was in richie’s stomach, how he’d had his stomach pumped. that the doctors would do whatever they could but that everyone should be prepared for the worst.

if eddie hadn’t already been leaning his complete body weight on bill he would’ve have dropped to the floor. as it was his vision blurred out for a moment and he was pretty sure he was going to throw up everywhere

“eddie, hey eddie we gotta go, eds…”

“DON’T FUCKING CALL ME THAT” eddie knew people in the emergency room were all staring at him, he didn’t fucking care at this point. “dont call me that, you don’t get to, not you, not, no.”

they all agreed eddie should go in alone first. maggie was sitting in one of the chairs closest to the bed, holding onto richie’s limp hand. she got up and hurried over to wrap eddie up in her arms.

“eddie, oh, eddie, my poor baby. what happened?”

eddie sobbed into her shoulder and held himself tight against her. this was a mother, this was love. he’d been showed this thanks to richie, he had this in his life because of richie.

eddie pulled away from maggie and launched himself into the chair beside the bed. richie looked terrible and eddie choked hard on his heart.

“richie, oh my god, richie, baby. why did you do it? fuck, babe. i- i love you. i love you. holy fuck, i love you. i hope you can hear me, i need you to know.”

the other losers all came in one by one and gave equally tearful sobbing declaration of love and grief and sorrow. eddie asked each person every time they came into the room if anybody had gotten a hold of stan. they always said no.

it pained eddie to think that richie was going to die and stan wasnt going to be there, wasn’t going to know

eddie had his head resting on richie’s un-moving arm, eyes occasionally dipping shut before he forced them back open.

if richie was going to die tonight, there was no way eddie was going to be asleep and unaware when it happened.

it felt like hours had passed of gradual beeping from the motions keeping richie alive, showing that richie was alive. eddie clung to that sound, richie was hooked up to machines to help him breathe but he was alive.

the was.the sun was starting to leak through the windows when stan finally bursts into the room, still wearing pajamas with a coat hastily thrown on. he’s hair stuck out at a thousand different angles. eddie had never seen the boy look less than perfect before in all the years he’d known him yet here he was, looking like an utter hot mess.

“he was asking for you”

stan makes some strangled noise in the back of his throat. “fuck, tozier, what the hell have you done?” stan knelt beside the bed and grabbed the hand that eddie wasn’t resting on. “come on, asshole, you’re not doing this. do you hear me? you’re not. you’re not going anywhere. if you go, i have to go with you and i’m not ready. we don’t leave each other behind, you traitor. you know better.”

eddie felt the arm shifting under him and he startled away from his boyfriend. he stared, wide eyed, looking at the simple motion on richie’s face like he was trying to open his eyes. “stanley.”

stan looks up from where he was staring blankly at richie’s hand in his grip and his mouth dropped open.

“rich, richie, baby,” eddie cooed, bringing the twitching hand to his mouth. “can you hear me?”

richie made a moaning sound that might have been eddie’s name as his eyes fluttered open then filled with utter panic. he thrashes momentarily and grabs at the ventilator while coughing

“no no richie stop stop”

“richie baby dont do that just wait”

nurses come rushing in and they usher eddie and stan aside. they pull out the ventilator and said some things to richie explaining what had happened. wentworth and maggie were there, petting his hair and crying to each other .richie looks up at his parents as the doctors and nurses leave to give them privacy.

eddie and stan hover in the doorway, shifting from one foot to the foot and unable to meet each other’s gaze. “eddie…” richie called out weakly and eddie was launching over to his side instantly. he flopped himself down onto richie’s chest, half hanging off of the bed onto the floor. he cries into his chest while richie cries all the harder.

“im sorry eds fuck fuck im sorry i love you”

“i love you, i love you, i love you.”

the two boyfriends cried into each other for a long, long moment before richie made a forced laugh“can we just pretend i made a stupid ass joke or something to cut the tension?”

eddie snorted and leaned away so he was on his knees in front of richie’s bed, wiping at his tears and laughing sadly. richie’s gaze moved over and he found stan still hovering by the door

“i looked for you”

stan choked. “i… i was sleeping.”

me too… technically.”

“not funny,” all four people in the room reprimand.

#reddie #reddie hcs #stozier #stozier hcs #streddie #it hcs #my hcs #requests #my writing #suicide tw #suicide mention #i didnt' know how to end this lmao

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wallas-dinston · 6 years

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Hello! So this is another excerpt from the fanfic I wrote a while ago. For context, the POV is from Sunshine Curtis, middle child of the Curtis siblings, who had a relationship with Johnny Cade. This is the end of the story as she is working through her emotions. Please let me know if you like it!

I passed Darry as he walked through the door, stepping outside for fresh air. The sun was setting. The intricate swirls of orange and pink seemed to set a golden blanket across the town. It was beautiful. I wished I could stay that way forever. I cried silently, until Pony saw me and stopped me. He sat down next to me silently, but had an expectant look on his face. I didn't know how to put how I was feeling into words. It was almost too much for me alone.

“It's over. They're gone. But I can't stop fighting it! I'm tired. I'm tired of letting all the emotions overtake me. But I don't know how to stop. I can never just stop. I always have to push everything.” I wailed. I was frustrated and desperate and dejected. Pony grabbed me by the shoulders and looked me straight in the eyes, calming me.

“Sunshine Curtis, It is not over. Things will get better in the end. If they aren't better, it isn't the end. Don't beat yourself up. They wouldn't want to see you like that. Now smile. You look better that way.” I grinned at him and wiped my eyes. He was right. Things would change, and things will crush me and burn me and bring me down, but I had to fight through it. There was a light at the end of the tunnel. And I might not be able to see it right now, there might be fog hindering the glow, but the storm will calm and I would make it there. I hugged him strongly, smiling.

“Thank you.” I whispered, walking away. I stepped back inside of the house, reaching my bedroom. I put on the jacket, Johnny’s jacket, and began to exit the house. I knew where I was headed. I walked down the sidewalk, remembering Johnny, his smile, the auburn strands that mixed in with his hair, the way he smelled like earth after rain. His face glinting in the moonlight, the way his eyes sparked when he looked at me. I remembered the feeling I got every time I talked to him, the way his arms felt along my shoulders, the feeling of the grass tickling our feet as we danced under the stars. I remembered the faint golden freckles that dotted his face. I passed the house he cursed and cared for, the house that trapped him, and formed him into who he was. I passed Bucks house, the temporary home of Dallas Winston, a role model, a hoodlum, a friend. A breeze blew past me, circling me. The wind whispered in my ear, filling my head with the sound of Johnny’s laugh, Dally’s quick remarks. Even the officers would miss seeing Dallas. He weaved his way into your life, making it interesting. I walked by the Nightly-Double, feeling the soft denim of Johnny’s jean jacket lying upon my shoulders, the warmth of Johnny’s loving and cute remarks. The gum wrapper notes I stuck in his pocket. I recalled the sound our shoes made as we raced down the pavement, and the way you could hear the smile in his voice when he was happy. That was the way I would remember Johnny, because I was the only one that could get him to open up and talk. Other people would remember him as I saw him in the hospital, as timid, skittish and weak. They would see a puppy that had been kicked too many times. But he was so much more than that. I wanted to remember the side of him that was almost exclusively saved for me. The one that laughed wildly, and was sweet and kind. I passed the empty lot, where our friendship had begun so many years ago.

Me and Darry walked onto the gravel strewn grass of the empty lot. We used it as a shortcut to get home from school sometimes. I passed through the area, noticing a kid, he looked around my age, five, and he was badly injured. I took Darry’s hand, who was responsible for walking me home, and lead him over to the boy. He was slumped up against a tree, with a black eye and multiple other bruises on his body.

“Are you okay?” I asked sympathetically. He looked up at me with large puppy dog eyes, tears lining them. He shook his head no, and I rushed over to him. I looked up at Darry expectantly.

“Im Sunshine. What's your name?” I asked lightheartedly.

“Johnny Cade.” He mumbled.

“Johnnycakes? That's a funny name. I have brothers with funny names too. Sodapop and Ponyboy.” I laughed. He laughed too.

“No. Johnny CADE.” He pronounced. I flushed red from my error. Darry looked concerned, and he was pondering something.

“Maybe you should come home with us. My parents can fix you up.” Darry offered. Johnny looked hesitant, but accepted the offer. He smiled at me and I smiled back as we started down the road towards my house, also known as the Curtis’s.

I smiled from the memory. I looked up from the ground and realized I had reached my final destination. I sat down on the swings we had shared so many talks on. We stated our worries to each other, and always left laughing. The sunset was the richest I had ever seen it, the colors popping from the sky. It felt like Johnny was sending a message, saying hello. A single tear rolled down my cheek, as I held myself. I looked up at the sky, watching the clouds swirl and mix. My heart flooded, and I saw him and all he was in that sunset.

“I love you too, Johnny Cade.” I whispered to the sky, the breeze carrying my words away and through the town, down the roads I knew so well. And as soon as they were spoken they had disappeared, taken away and gone with the wind.

When I was younger I would always try to escape the world; close my eyes and create a dream world, a fantasy. I was caught up in my bedtime stories. Nobody was ever hurt. Nobody left you. It was unrealistic, but I didn't mind. Life was simpler. The whole world seemed to be one block wide and our problems were so small. Goodbye only meant, ‘See you tomorrow!’ And we lived our lives without a worry in the world. I grew up with dirt on my knees and cuts on my elbows. We thought we were cool, smoking and sitting on the curb, trying our best to act tuff. We were full of youthful vigor. We felt invincible. And I liked it that way. It was blissful inside my ignorant mind. I felt so sure of myself. And I never wanted to grow up anyhow. I was sacred to.

Well, I’ve made it to ‘older’ and I understand. Life is unfair, and it hurts you, but you have to take the good with the bad. I have lost people, but gained so many things. Friends, knowledge, a better understanding of who I am. Life is one big lesson, one big chance to learn and grow. But sometimes it catches up to you. Time is less expendable than it is thought to be. I know the real meaning of tough now, too. Dallas strived to reach it his whole life, but he was far off. He was looking in all the wrong places. Being tough was living through hard things and not letting it break you, but letting it make you stronger. Dally broke. He had lost. But I hadnt, and I never would. I used to be scared of the dark and the things that lurked in it, but now I find comfort in the night. It reminds me of the people I lost along the way, and the stars of how they lit up my life. Johnny still lives in the quiet black, and the wild and free things of the night bring Dally along with them. My parents live within the love and wonder of the cool air. And they aren't really gone, they never will be. Their words formed me into the person I am today, and continue to shape me and affect me. I don't force things anymore. Whatever happens happens. Deep down I am still a child, but I know more now.

A sudden feeling of closure overtook me, and I knew it would all be okay. My whole being felt lighter as I stood up from the swingset, taking one last look at the sky before heading on my way. I was ready. Not to move on, but to move forward. I knew I would never move on. Nobody would. But that was alright. I walked back through the town, retracing my steps. I kicked stones on the sidewalk, smiling to myself when I spotted the dandelion growing from a small crack in the pavement. I bent down and snapped the stem, picking up the flower gently. The oncoming fall had turned the once yellow petals to small puffy skeletons of their former beauty. My mom used to laugh when I picked them. “They are weeds, Sunshine.” She would say. And I would always reply, “Beautiful weeds.” I suppose that some saw a weed while others saw a wish. I took a moment to blow on the fragile flower, my conscience speaking a small wish as I did. I disregarded the green twig from my now sticky fingers and continued walking again. The emotion I was feeling was so oddly unexplainable. It was almost . . . light orange. I passed my house as well as the Shepard household, where the grass doesn't seem to grow. I passed the small drugstore in the center, and the DX gas station. I walked and walked, dreaming the whole way, until the road seemed to slowly get smoother and the houses larger. Reading the street signs carefully, I realized how even they sounded more extravagant. Seminole Street, Birmingham Ave, Grand View, Fostoria Street. I had to catch my mind from drifting off again, making sure I didn't miss the one I was looking out for. I turned onto the street once I found it and read all the house numbers. 367, 398, 405, 426. And then I was there. 431 Cedar Street. I knocked on the door, which after a moment slowly opened to reveal a familiar face. A pair of green eyes greeted me.

“Hey.” I smiled. “Are you still up for that movie?”

#im sorry #yikes #yuck #original #the outsiders #johnny cade #sunshine curtis #sodapop curtis #darry curtis #dallas winston #steve randle #two bit mathews

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taesugakookiess · 6 years

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Boundaries PT II | Sweet Pea🍇

Boundaries PT I Sweet Pea x Rose Andrews Summary: You’ll see. Warning: Meh. Not yet. Word Counter: 2,205 Taglist: @samithepixie @majesticmarais @jackslittleavery @jackaverysboo @jackaverybabe @jackaverx @callykim @heyowdw @blushybesson @beautybesson @lovableherron @clairedoe @trustfundbabby @im-on-something-different @ishouldtakeyoutothemoon @ramenavery @noodles-send-n00ds Lemme know if you wanna be tagged in future shit👌🏽

"Huh, whawazzah" I snorted as loud knocking woke me up. I realized it was knocking at the door. I turned over to my side to look at the clock, it was 10:34 in the morning, "Who could be at the door," I said scowling at the sunlight.

I slid my feet into my slippers and relentlessly went to see who decided to interrupt my beauty rest. I opened the door to see Dilton Doiley standing at my front door, smiling, "Oh, Dilton," I said rubbing my forehead. "Good morning, Rosalie," Dilton chimed. "It's just...Rose," I stared at him, "Why're you here so early?" "I figured an early start is better," He said. “Start?” I said with my eyebrows raised.

“You asked me to help you with homework,” He cocked his head to the side. "Oh yeah..." I felt dumb, I sighed, "Come on in." "Of course," Dilton walked inside. I have a thing for being unattractively clumsy and forgetting the simplest things. Those are some reasons why I'm single to this day. On the bright side though, I can dress and I'm kinda cute.

"Want some lemonade? It's fresh," I said pointing to the kitchen. "Sure," He smiled. "Cool," I said walking into the kitchen. "D-D'you have a date..." Dilton said nervously scratching his head. "A date?" I said frowning. "T-To the dance, the dance that's tomorrow night," He laughed. "Ooh, I totally forgot," I said squinting my eyes, "...Nope." "Oh, that's too bad. A girl as beautiful as you should always have a date," He said bashfully. "I agree," I said placing the glasses of lemonade on coasters. "I don't have a date either," He said staring at the ice-cold glasses. I crinkled my nose, "Aw, why?" "I asked Betty, she's going with Jughead, Veronica's going with Archie, Josie said no, Cheryl's too scary," He said fiddling with his hands. I felt bad, "Jeez." It got quiet for a few seconds, I didn't know what to say. "Yeah. I was thinking though..." He said taking his glasses off. "Hm?" "Since you don't have a date, and I don't have a date...could you...I dunno, go with me?" He said before jumping up, "If you say no, then it's completely fine-" I felt really bad, the poor guy was lonely. I didn't have a date because I completely forgot about the dance, "I'd love to." "I won't force-" He kept apologizing before pausing in shock, "What?" "I'd love to go with you, Dilton." A huge smile crept across his face, "Oh my god...I don't know what to say..." "Go home, I'll do the homework on my own," I smiled. He was so overly excited, he ran out the door like a man that just got happily married. I'm not even gonna lie to you guys, I didn't wanna go with Dilton. I still have thoughts about Sweet Pea, constantly. I'm just forcing myself to not like him. Yes, yes it is very difficult. Did I tell you that he goes to Riverdale High? I try to avoid him giving that Archie goes there too and I love my brother more than anything. But he’s been on tough ends with Sweet Pea, it's becoming repetitive. Oh, oh, did I tell you what happened the other day? Oh, brother.

A few days ago.

I was at my locker getting a few textbooks for upcoming classes when someone slammed my locker shut, "How 'bout we skip school." I looked up to see Sweet Pea hovering over me, "No, thanks." "Everybody in the school knows that Rose can't get Sweet Pea off her mind," He played with my hair. I frowned, "Don't you have a gang to be with or something," I snatched my hair from him, "And stop touching me." He laughed, "I do, but I couldn't have passed up the opportunity to get under your skin." That made my face crinkle, "Oh?" "And guess what..." He said leaning in on me, "...I know how you feel about me, you can't hide it, Rosebush. It's obvious that you love every second of me tormenting you." I narrowed my eyes at him as he talked in a low, raspy, seductive tone, "I do not," I lied. He smiled, "Whatever you say. We all see how red you get when I come around." I stared into his eyes, "...I hate you," I pushed him away from me. "Do you really? Or do you hate how much you love me," He laughed. "Hey!" Archie shouted from the other end of the hall, walking towards us. I started to leave to avoid drama before Sweet Pea pulled me in and kissed me. I was in total shock as his lips pressed against mine. It felt weird to finally kiss someone but I...liked it. Archie pushed Sweet Pea, "What did I tell you?!" Sweet Pea pushed Archie into a locker. That caused attention to be drawn. Serpents poured from every which way and stood their grounds for Sweet Pea. Veronica, Betty, Reggie, and Kevin stood around Archie. I stood in the middle still halfway in shock about the kiss, "Archie!" "Hush, Rose!" "Archie, it's not worth it," Reggie scowled at the Serpents. Veronica wrapped her arms around me, "Are you okay, Rosie?" Her warm embrace comforted me even though I was the slightest mad, "Yeah," I smiled at her, still rubbing my lips wishing they were still locked with Sweet Pea's. "These northerners aren't worth our time, Sweet Pea," Fangs eyed everyone. "Guys," Jughead said trying to not pick sides. Sweet Pea stared down at Archie as they had a staring contest, "Don't ever test your luck like that again, Andrews," he said clenching his jaw. Archie just stared at him with a death stare. Sweet Pea looked at me, still clenching his jaw, he reached his hand out to me. I was confused, I almost reached out when Veronica gripped on me, "Leave her alone." He walked away with the serpents, not without casually bumping Archie on the way. I felt like it was my fault but they're totally beefing about something that's NOT my fault. "Archie, relax," Betty said. "Rose, you don't see it do you," Archie stood in front of me. "See what? We were just talking," I said. "Talking with a kiss? Sure, He's trying to play you," Archie shook his head. "He is not, how do you know?" "Because I do!" He said before walking away. I leaned against my locker, thinking about that kiss. It was sensational and awkward at the same time. Why did he do that? Those thoughts run through my head daily, I can't get him off my mind no matter how much I try.

"Betts, it's like, I don't even know myself anymore," I said, chucking her a bag of chips.

She caught it, "You need to relax. Seriously. You're so worked up." "He kissed me!" "You liked it," Veronica winked at me. I blushed, "I did not,” I lied. "Yeah, right,your face is all red," Betty laughed. "I just...I feel like I've known him all my life," I said sinking into the chair. "I know that feeling," Veronica said. "I bet. I can't say, but...it's almost as if it was love at first sight," I said contemplating on it.

“That'll be weird though, Rosie, you and him," Veronica said. "Would not. He's sweet in his own way," I half-smiled. Veronica was right, it would be weird for me and Sweet Pea to date. He's a gang member beefing with my brother. I'm your average town girl.

Rose’s Dress

"You look beautiful," Archie said standing in my doorway. He startled me, "Thanks." We didn't speak much, I was preparing for Dilton to pick me up. I wore a red backless bodycon dress with my hair in a slick bun to the back. I also wore the heels my mom gave me a while ago for a date that wasn't successful. I looked at myself in the mirror while applying red lipstick to my lips, I agreed with Archie, I looked really nice. My red hair and freckles complemented the entire look. My green eyes sparkled as I admired myself, "Don't screw this up, Rose," I told myself. "I'm sorry about everything that's been going on," He eventually spoke up. I smiled, "It's fine Arch." "I just don't want you to be hurt," He said with a crack in his voice. "I know, I get how you feel. You have to trust me on some things though," I rubbed his shoulder. He hugged me, we never argued as much as we were for the past few days, I felt like our relationship was tearing apart. I heard a knock at the door, "That's Dilton," I laughed. "See you there," Archie said walking me downstairs. "My princess," Dad said smiling, "Tell Dilton I'll break his little neck if-" "Dad!" I crinkled my nose. He burst out laughing, "I'm kidding." "You don't have to worry about Dilton, he's a sweetheart either way," I said. I opened the door, revealing Dilton with a tuxedo on, holding a bouquet of red roses and a box of chocolates, "W-Wow," I giggled, "Dilton, you shouldn't have." "I wanted to make this very special," He said. He grabbed my hand and we walked to his little mo-pad. He gave me a helmet and I put it on gently, avoiding my hair getting ruined. I thought about how embarrassing it would be to drive to a school dance in a mo-ped but I accepted it. Dilton deserved it. I sat on the mo-ped sideways, "Be careful!" My dad shouted from the door. I held onto Dilton as we drove through Riverdale, the wind caressing my face. When we got to the school parking lot, there were tons of cars and people rushing to get inside. Dilton held my hand, I realized he was shorter than me with or without the heels. We went to the gymnasium where the dance was being held, "May I have this dance?" Dilton said. "Of course," I said as he placed both hands on my hips, I wrapped my arms around his shoulders.

We slowly danced to the music, it was an awkward silence though. He just stared at me, with a look of pure awe. I burst out laughing, "What?" "You're just really pretty," He said fixing his glasses. "Am I? Thanks," I said blushing. He quickly nudged me off of him, "My glasses are getting all foggy," He snorted. I giggled, "It's fine. How about we go sit?" "Sure." We sat at an unoccupied table and Dilton got us some fruit punch. I gasped when I saw a group of people wearing leather jackets walked into the gymnasium. I tried to hide my face, when Sweet Pea walked up to my table, "Well, well, well." "Sweet Pea, leave," I said as Dilton talked to Moose over by the snack table. "You look so good right now, I might have to take a bite," Sweet Pea said. He drew his lower lip between his teeth, pulling a chair to the table. "What do you want?" I said hoping that Dilton won't come over. "I came to see you, figured you'd be here," He said pressing his lips together. I sighed, "I'm here with Dilton. Please, just...we can talk later." "The little guy over there?" He pointed to Dilton who was laughing with his friends. I rolled my eyes, "M'yeah. He's little but he's sweet." Sweet Pea burst out in laughter, Dilton started walking over, "What's going on?" "Sweet Pea was just leaving," I scowled at him. He stood up, "Actually, I was wondering if I could take Rose for a moment..." Dilton smiled at Sweet Pea, "Sure." "Cool," Sweet Pea smirked while wrapping his arm around my shoulder. "What do you want," I said giving him a dirty look. He guided me through the gym doors, into a classroom, "Is there something you wanna tell me?" He gave me a lopsided grin while sitting in a chair backward. "What are you going at now?" I folded my arms. "You know what I'm going at," He said. I gritted my teeth, "Sweet Pea...I have to go," I began to leave, he grabbed me gently. "Maybe you should tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing's wrong," I looked away. His mouth twisted, "Oh? Don't pretend like you didn't enjoy that kiss." I began to pick at my nails, frowning my face, "I did, I loved it, it's just-" "Why're you acting like you don't like me then?" He said walking closer. "I'm not acting!" I stomped my foot, "I just...don't-" "Are you embarrassed? Is that it? A northerner girl has feelings for a southside Serpent, " His smile faded, "Rose, you and I could be better than anyone in Riverdale. I'm not the type to love but...you brought something out of me," Sweet Pea set his mouth in a hard line. I was speechless. He walked up to me, lifting my chin, slowly leaning in for a kiss. I went with it, pressing my lips against his. Our eyes were open, he was staring into my eyes with a meaning.

“Rose," Dilton said with a shocked look on his face, standing in the doorway. "Dilton," I jerked my head to his direction.

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