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lucidlivi · 10 months

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Chosen For Pleasure (VII)

Series Masterlist/Warnings

Tag List: @ladysparkles78 @suckitands33 @little-x-wolf @stoneyggirl2 @creative-writing92 @jc-winchester @mrsjenniferwinchester @lessons-of-red @jamerlynn @deans-baby-momma @willow-sages @ritz-hell-hotel @perpetualabsurdity @mhessellund @itzabbyxx @chriszgirl92 @abbybarnesstuff @larrem88 @commonsenseishard (we are growing bigger and bigger! if you would like to be added to the growing list, please send me an ask or a message so I can keep track better! xoxo)

I’m making this part extra long as appreciation for all the love you’ve shown me and this story, (over 100 followers already, over 100 reblogs.. that’s crazy!) it will also help move the story along…I’m so sorry for this…. ya’ll ain’t ready!

“call me as soon as you land so I know you made it safely.” Stella says giving me one last hug.

“I will.” I said squeezing her.

I was boarding my flight to California to see my mom. I thought that Jensen would have at least said goodbye, but he was really busy and I understood that. It wasn’t a terribly long flight to Santa Cruz, I kept my mind occupied with a book. As soon as I got off the plane I saw a familiar face waiting for me. I smiled dropping my bag and ran to hug my mother.

“look at you, you look so different.” my mom said placing a hand to my cheek.

“mom it hasn’t been that long.” I laughed.

“I know, I just mean you look happier, you’re glowing different.” she smiles.

I returned her grin grabbing my stuff and following her to the car.

“Richard is so excited to meet you.”

“you look happier too mom.”

I pulled out my phone to text Stella as I had promised. I furrowed my eyebrows seeing I had a missed called from Jensen. I quickly dialed him.

“thought you forgot about me for some surfer dude already.” He joked as he answered.

“a surfer dude? nah that’s not really my type, I prefer the uptight actors turned businessmen.” I shot back.

“woah woah I am not uptight.”

“just a little.”

“not at all.” He defended.

“whatever you say Ackles.”

there was a moment of silence.

“I uh wanted to tell you to have a good time with your mom, I meant to call but I’ve been trying to negotiate this deal for a new property but uh she’s not biting.”

“she?” I said hesitantly.

“the seller, she’s kind of stubborn, reminds me of someone else I know.”

“I am not stubborn.” I defended quickly.

“just a little.” He laughs mocking me from just seconds earlier.

“okay maybe a little.” I laughed.

His laughter grew too.

“but I can admit my flaws.” I huffed.

“yeah I think I’ll save that conversation for another time, but hey I gotta go, meeting in five minutes.”

“Jensen?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks”

“Say hi to your mom for me.” He said before hanging up the phone.

I could feel the smile on my face get just a bit bigger. He was trying.

Before I knew it we were pulling in to the driveway of my mom’s house. A man stood there waving at me. I watched my mom hop out wrapping her arms around Richard. He leaned down kissing her lips. I was really happy for her. I got out of the car walking to him.

“I’m so happy to meet you, I’ve heard so much about you, I’m Richard.” He said pulling me in for a hug.

I was nine when my father passed, I remembered him fondly. He was warm and kind. Richard kind of reminds me of him. I could tell I was going to like him. Once I got settled we had dinner, my mom and Richard were telling me the story of how they met. They looked so happy. So in love.

I thought back to Jensen. I wasn’t sure where we stood, we’re we dating, we’re we truly just friends with benefits?I was trying to be patient like Jared said but it was really hard when I felt like he was holding a lot back. I found the more I was with him, the harder it was getting to stay away. I was falling in love with him, and that scared the hell out of me.

Nightfall had come quickly. I said goodnight to my mom and Richard, settling down for the night. I couldn’t stop thinking about Jensen. I pulled out my phone sending him a text.

:california is boring without you… but lately everywhere is boring with you.

I bit my lip waiting for a reply. When it didn’t come right away I started to overthink. Was I getting too close? Was that too clingy? I saw the chat bubbles pop up as he typed a reply.

:having dinner with the seller tonight, hoping to finish deal.

:oh, like just you and her?

:don’t worry about it.

I sighed setting my phone on the night stand. Once again he pushes away when I try to get close. My phone buzzed on the side table prompting me to pick it up. I saw it was Jensen calling. I didn’t bother to answer. He told me not to worry, so I wasn’t.

****************************************************

I awoke to the warm California sun shining in to my eyes. I checked my phone seeing three missed calls from Jensen. I sighed about to redial him when my mom burst in to the room.

“get dressed, we’re going to the country club for breakfast, they have the best mimosas you’ve ever tasted!”

I laughed at her antics.

Jensen could wait. I needed a drink.

I threw on a simple sundress meeting my mom in the car. I took in the beautiful sights as she drove. I had never been to a country club before, but this place was pretty nice. We sat down ordering two mimosas.

“so, tell me about this guy.” my mom smiled sipping her drink.

Of course she wanted to talk about Jensen.

“what do you want to know?” I asked taking large gulps of mine.

Damn these were good.

“I don’t know, everything.”

I scoffed choking back a laugh. So would I.

“Uh there’s not much to know, he’s kind of closed off.” I said before chewing my bottom lip.

“what do you mean darling?”

“I mean, it’s complicated mama, one minute everything’s great and the next he shuts down. It’s like he’s afraid of me getting too close, so he pushes me away.”

I sighed chugging the rest of my drink. I definitely needed this.

“maybe he is, did I ever tell you that your dad was engaged when I met him?”

“no, what happened!?”

“long story short she ended up cheating on him, he was broken, he couldn’t trust anyone, not even me. It took awhile to break down his walls, but I knew your dad was special, so I kept trying. If you think this Jensen is worth it keep trying.”

I was quiet as I took in her words.

“I think I’m going to need another one of these.” I laughed holding up my empty glass.

A waiter brought me another mimosa. I took a big sip pulling out my phone to call Jensen back. Suddenly a text came through making me choke on my drink.

:might want to go easy on those mimosas, don’t want a repeat of last time you drank.

“holy shit.”

“what’s a matter honey?”

“It’s Jensen, he’s here.” I choked.

At my words Jensen walked up in his usual suit and tie attire.

“what? how?” I asked sitting my drink down.

I could see my mom smirk as she looked up at him.

“Ma’am it’s a pleasure to meet you, Jensen Ackles.” he said shaking my mother’s hand.

“nice to meet you.” she said.

she looked between me and Jensen.

“I’ll give you a minute.”

I watched her walk away before turning to him.

“what are you doing here?” I asked picking up my drink again sipping it.

“you didn’t answer my calls, I thought something happened to you.”

“no Jensen that was called me ignoring you.” I said rolling my eyes.

“okay I deserved that.”

“how was your dinner?” I sassed.

“very productive and professional, I closed the deal.” He said laughing at my jealousy.

“well then congratulations I guess.”

“and I’m here to take you out to celebrate.”

“wait what?”

“just come with me, I promise you won’t regret it.” He said offering his hand.

“where too?”

“It’s a surprise.” He laughed.

“I think I met my quota on surprises. Plus I can’t just leave my mom.” I spoke.

“of course you can…” she said popping up out of nowhere.

“of course you can.” Jensen repeated once again extending his hand.

I looked between him and my mother heaving a sigh as I grabbed his hand.

“I promise to have her back before dinner.” Jensen said winking at my mom.

He led me out to a rental car, I was surprised to see Cole waiting with the door open.

“you brought Cole too?” I asked giving Cole a smile.

“Ms. (L/N).” He said nodding his head as I climbed in the backseat.

“I mean he does work for me.” Jensen laughed.

“Poor Cole.” I smirked as Jensen rolled his eyes at my teasing.

Cole started to drive. It was quiet as Jensen rested a hand on my knee. I can’t believe he came all this way to see me.

“Jensen why did you come here?” I asked biting my lip.

“Ouch you’re not happy to see me? Is it the surfer dude? It is isn’t it?” He jokes turning towards me.

“you know I’m always happy to see you, I’m just surprised is all.”

“I told you to celebrate.” He said not meeting my eyes.

“you came all this way to celebrate.?” I asked not believing him.

“yeah, a good thing happened to me and I wanted to share that with you.” He said simply.

I thought my heart was going to burst out of my chest.

“I think that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever told me.” I said smiling.

“Yeah well don’t get used to it.” He smirked.

I playfully slapped his chest. I looked out the window as the car stopped.

“a dock?” I questioned.

“come on.” He smiled pulling me out of the car.

I saw a big yacht docked in the water.

“we’re going on that?” I asked smiling.

“yep.” He said pulling me onboard.

He pulled me on deck letting me look around. I had never been on a boat before so this was a new experience for me. Jensen disappeared down in the cabin, trading his suit and tie for just a pair of board shorts.

I swallowed looking at his toned chest. I had seen him naked already but somehow it still always got me flustered. He smirked at me before going to the wheel.

“wait you’re sailing this thing? I laughed coming to stand beside him.

“yep, and you’re going to help me.” He smiled starting to depart from the dock.

“I don’t think you want me to help, I mean do you want to crash?” I joked.

“It’s okay, it’s a private bay, can’t crash into the water.” He said.

The boat picked up speed as he sailed further and further into the bay. I felt so at peace as the wind blew through my hair. I couldn’t fight the smile that I donned. I noticed Jensen watching me intently.

“come on, you’re taking the wheel.” Jensen said pulling me in front of him.

“no I can’t.” I laughed nervously.

“I got you don’t worry.” He said placing a soft kiss to my neck.

He put his hands on top of mine, showing me how to sail the ship.

“Jensen don’t let go.” I laughed.

“I have too, you’ll be fine.”

Jensen moved his hands settling them around my waist as he held me against him.

“Oh my gosh I’m doing it!”

He laughed pecking my cheek. He took the wheel again slowing the boat to a stop. I walked to the edge looking at the beautifully calm water. Jensen came to my side, climbing over the railing and standing over the edge.

“what are you doing?”

“swimming.” He said jumping off in to the water below.

He submerged only for a second before popping back up.

“well what are you waiting for?” He asked calling up to me.

“you’re crazy.” I yelled.

“please for me?” He called smiling.

I bit my lip, finally letting my secret slip.

“don’t laugh, but I can’t swim.” I said my cheeks heating up with embarrassment.

He didn’t laugh.

“Don’t worry I got you.” He said for the second time today.

I sighed shaking my head before pulling my sundress over my head so I was just in my bra and underwear. I nervously looked at the water.

Was I really doing this?

I closed my eyes jumping in feet first. In an instant my body was engulfed in the cool water. I panicked momentarily before I felt warm hands go to my waist. Jensen smiled as he pulled me towards him. I wrapped my legs around his waist as we floated in the water.

“see you’re okay.” He said holding me up.

“you’re crazy.” I laughed my hands gripping his broad shoulders.

“Me? You’re the one jumping in to the ocean when you don’t know how to swim.” He joked giving me a wink.

“I find that my logic usually goes out the window with you Mr. Ackles.” I whispered.

“is this more?” He asked bringing a hand up to cup my cheek.

“huh?”

“At Jared’s you told me that you needed more, is this more?” He furrowed his eyebrows like he was really concerned what my answer would be.

I thought back to that day. I didn’t think he was really listening to me, but it turns out I was very wrong.

“so much more.” I smiled wrapping my arms around him and hugging him.

I pulled back to see him staring at me.

“what is it?” I asked feeling a blush come to my cheeks.

“I just like seeing you smile.” He whispered looking in my eyes.

I swallowed nervously as his gaze shifted between my eyes and my lips. He leaned in resting his forehead against mine. I could hear his breathing become shaky. He gulped as he moved his lips a little closer. I parted mine waiting and desperate for the contact but he quickly pulled away looking embarrassed.

“I’m sorry I can’t, just not right now.” He said turning his face away from me.

I grabbed his chin quickly making him face me again.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to apologize.” I said running a hand across the back of his neck.

I could see behind his eyes that someone really hurt him, it killed me to not know.

“what was her name?” I asked hesitantly.

He didn’t answer just swallowed nervously.

“who did this to you? who made you feel like this?” I asked getting emotional.

“It’s in the past now. Come on it’s getting late, we should start heading back. He said swimming over to the ladder at the side of the boat.

He helped me on, pushing me up so I could pull myself out of the water. He pulled himself up with ease going back to the wheel. I sighed pulling my sundress back on. Jensen was silent as he sailed us back to the dock. I walked up behind him, wrapping my arms around him, leaving a trail of kisses on his back up to his neck. Once we docked the boat Jensen turned around in my arms pulling me in to a bone crushing hug.

We stood there a minute in each others embrace.

“thank you for this, and for not making fun of my inability to swim.” I said offering him a smile.

He chuckled a little. He opened his mouth to reply but his phone ringing caught him off guard. He quickly answered, eyebrows furrowing with worry at whoever was talking.

“yeah, okay I’ll be right there.” He spoke before hanging up.

“everything okay?” I asked concerned.

“yeah just something came up at work.” He said grabbing my hand.

“come on Cole can drop you back at your moms house.”

****************************************************

“are you sure you can’t stay one more day sweetheart?” my mom asked as she hugged me for what seemed like the millionth time.

“I wish I could mama.” I said giving her a kiss on her cheek.

I pulled away wrapping my arms around Richard.

“take care of her for me won’t you?” I whispered in his ear.

“of course darling.”

I gave my mother one last hug before boarding my plane. It was another quiet plane ride. I was exhausted and just ready to be home. I was surprised to find Cole standing in the airport holding a sign with my name on it.

“did you think I wouldn’t recognize you Cole?” I asked laughing.

“Mr. Ackles requests your presence at his estate.” Cole said taking my bag from me and leading me out to his car.

“Is everything okay, what’s going on?” I asked nervously.

“I’m afraid I can’t discuss anything Ms. (L/N).”

“Is Jensen okay?” I panicked.

“He’s a little preoccupied I’m afraid.”

I got sick with nerves as we drove to his house. Everything seemed fine when he left. I jumped out of the car before Cole could bring it to a complete stop, running inside.

“Jensen?” I called.

I was relieved to see him sitting on the stairs, hunched over with something in his lap. I walked over closer to him.

“Jensen?” I said placing a hand on his arm.

He quickly shrugged it off, standing up and glaring at me.

“what’s going on?”

“you tell me.” He growled dropping a newspaper at my feet.

I picked it up, shocked to see Jensen and I on the front page. We were standing on the yacht wrapped up in each other. It wasn’t just that but under the picture was my name printed clearly.

“so the paparazzi caught us..?” I asked trying to understand the situation.

“It was a private bay they shouldn’t have been able to, unless of course someone tipped them off.” He said glaring at me.

Did he seriously think I would do something like that?

“Jensen you can’t be serious, I didn’t even know where we were going how could I have possibly done that?” I asked crossing my arms over my chest.

“I don’t know (y/n) how did they get all that information in the paper huh? How did they know I introduced you to the cast? How did they know I won’t kiss you huh? How did they know about our arrangement? HOW DID THEY KNOW?” He yelled in my face.

I shrunk back as he raised his voice. I never did well with people raising their voice at me, but when he did it, it felt like knives going into my chest.

“I don’t know but I didn’t say anything Jensen I swear.” I pleaded, tears running down my cheeks.

“God I’m so stupid. You’re just like her. Fuck.” Jensen growls grabbing a vase of flowers angrily hurling it against the wall.

The vase shatters on impact making me jump.

“Jensen please you have to believe me.” I begged reaching my hand out but he stopped me.

“you’re just like her.” He said the hurt evident in his eyes.

“Jensen I have no clue what you’re talking about because you don’t tell me ANYTHING. I’ve tried to be understanding but this is crazy. I would never sell you out to some sleazy journalist.” I yelled feeling my emotions on overload.

“I think you should leave.” He said sitting back on the stairs and putting his head in his hands.

I could feel my heart breaking.

“I’m falling in love with you.” I whispered desperately wiping some tears that fell.

He glances up at me quickly before glancing back down.

“well you shouldn’t, this was never a relationship.” He huffed.

“If I walk out that door I’m not coming back.” I said taking a shaky breath, the tears flowing like a waterfall.

He didn’t respond, just continued to stare at the floor. So I did the last thing I wanted to do.

I left.

I left without another word, without looking back.

I left.

Author Note:

I’m so sorry for breaking your heart! Butttt we’re getting a glance in to why Jensen is the way he is! We ain’t done yet so please stick around for more! And as always if you’re enjoying please let me know with a heart, reblog, comment or a follow!

xoxoxo

Part (VIII)

#jensen ackles #jensen ackles imagine #jensen ackles x female!reader #jensen ackles x reader #dean winchester #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester x reader #jensen ackles x you #jensen x reader #jensen ackles preference #jensen ackles fic #supernatural #jensen ackles fanfiction #jensen x you #jensen ackles smut

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spencerreidswhore187 · 11 months

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Checkmate (Part Four)

By @spencerreidswhore187 for @sackofpissandshit

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five

Summary: Spencer finds out that reader is not who he thought they were. (Lots of angst)

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Unsub (g!n) Reader

Word Count: 3K

TW: Death, kidnapping, mentions of assault, blood, strong-ish language

A/N: Hi! Thank you to everyone who liked, commented, reblogged and followed Checkmate, it means the world to me. I’m working ever day this week (curse tourists) so I stayed up really late last night to finish this. I hope you like it! ◡̈

You ran. You ran and ran and ran, you couldn’t bring yourself to stop. You could barely stand but nevertheless, you ran. You did not know where you were going but it did not matter, you had to keep running. The alternative was the nightmare that replayed in your mind every night when you tried to fall asleep.

You used the surrounding trees to push yourself forward, your coarse palms scarping the rough bark. You stumbled over the forest floor, unsure how much further you could go. But that doubt was not strong enough to override your natural instinct to run. Even if it killed you, you would never stop running - it wasn’t even an option.

Numb, cold, and alone, you were sure your feet were bleeding. You weren’t sure how long you’d been running. Your mind was bleeding also, your brain swelled with depressing thoughts. Thoughts you could not stand. Thoughts you had to escape. If only you could outrun your conscience as fast as you could outrun the truth.

There was blood everywhere. Crimson stained your hands and clung to your hair and face. Its metallic scent flooded your nose, it was nauseating. Still, you ran. Your shirt had been white, before, now it was the colour of rubies.

Spencer had once told you that the human body contained almost five litres of blood; you wondered how much engulfed you, now. You wondered how a body could hold this much blood.

Some of it was yours, you thought, but you weren’t sure. There was too much to belong to just one person.

There were endless questions that needed answering but it was futile as you ran. Run you repeated your mantra: run, run run. You would keep running, forever if you had to, until you found him.

Until you found Spencer.

——————————————————————————————————

Six Hours Earlier:

Spencer knew how the team would react well before he even proposed the idea.

They were all sitting around the round table discussing what they were to do about you, when he said, “We have the wrong person. Y/N didn’t do this.”

“Reid,” Emily sighed, “we’ve been over this.”

“I know…I-look, Emily, I’m not saying they’re innocent but they didn’t kill this group of people.”

“So,” Luke interrupted, “that doesn’t make them any less of a killer.”

Spencer knew he was right, he needed the others to believe it too.

“I understand that and I agree - I really do - but there is another killer out there.”

“We don’t know that-”

“Yes, we do! I showed you the tapes.” Spencer had felt wretched to do so but it was protocol and he needed the team, his friends, and his family, to know who they were up against. That didn’t make him feel any less guilty though, sharing secrets that had been meant for his ears only.

Luke held his head in his hands, hoping Spencer would eventually see some sense.

Garcia took them all by surprise when she defended him,

“Spencer is right, newbie. Yes, Y/N is guilty and yes they are dangerous but right now they aren’t a threat,” the colourful bangles draped across Penelope’s wrists clattered as she gesticulated wildly, “this Ben dude is and we can’t catch him without Y/N.”

She was right, they all knew it. That didn’t mean they liked it though.

Emily eventually broke the silence, speaking into her phone “Take them Y/N L/N out of their holding cell and bring them to me immediately. Do not remove their handcuffs.”

Emily hung up the call and turned to face the BAU, scanning their reactions.

“Garcia, I need you to go through 911 phone calls regarding missing children from around twelve to fourteen years ago. Tara, you, Luke and Rossi talk to Y/N - see what information you can get from them, and bring in a sketch artist. Reid, you’re with me. Let’s go.”

“What? Why?”

“You cannot be near them, you know this.”

“But-”

“No, Spencer. I need you focused. Let’s see if we can link Ben to other crimes in the area.”

“I can’t.”

“Then go home.”

Spencer wanted to but there were too many bad memories within those walls. What used to be their holy ground was now a crime scene.

——————————————————————————————————

You hated orange, it was such a frustratingly bright colour - it made you stand out when you’re whole life you had been trained to blend into the shadows. You felt stupid in the orange jumpsuit, chains binding your wrists together.

Two women clung to your arms and pulled you out of the elevator. You were relieved to escape the tight box, you hated small spaces - they made you feel like you couldn’t breathe.

The Keith brothers had locked in a wardrobe for days whenever you misbehaved.

Being in tiny rooms made you feel eight years old again, curled in a ball in an infinite darkness. Crying, begging for food or water.

You’d never told Spencer that you were claustrophobic but somehow he figured it out. It must be the profiler in him. No matter where you were or how many flights there were, he would always take the stairs with you, holding firmly onto your hand. He would always drive, get the bus or walk miles for you because he knew that you couldn’t be on trains without being consumed by intense fear.

You wished Spencer was here now, to hold your hand, to whisper sweet nothings into your ear.

But both of you knew, deep down, that would never happen again. You were living a delusion, yet it was so much better than the reality.

You were led back to the same interrogation room as before. You sat, patiently, as the guards tied your chains to the table before exiting.

Agent Rossi and Lewis were already seated opposite you and Luke Alvez was standing, leaning against a large mirror.

You wondered if Spencer was there, watching you.

You chewed at your cheek whilst you waited for the agents to say something.

“Tell us about Ben,” Lewis instructed.

This was your only shot at freedom - you knew better than to risk it.

“I don’t know his full name, he was always just Ben, or, um, the Bandit.”

Agent Rossi stood up rapidly.

“What did you just say?” He demanded.

“The Bandit?”

“Shit,” you heard Alvez whisper.

You’d never been one of the people who referred to Ben as ‘The Bandit’, he was always just Ben to you, once you had overheard a group of older men calling him that.

You remembered Beth, the only one who had treated you with any kindness telling you stories of the Bandit and his army of dead. She would stroke your hair as you went to sleep and tell you made-up stories of him and all his crimes. You weren’t well-liked by the others - they detested you for being Ben’s favourite, the one he always selected for missions.

It was only a few years ago that you’d discovered that the Bandit was real and he was, in fact, Ben. You never believed Beth’s stories, though…until now.

“It’s what some of the others would call him,” you explained.

Luke slipped out of the room and Tara and Rossi glanced at each other.

“Y/N,” Lewis asked gently, “Do you know where Ben is?”

You nodded. “He has an estate on the outskirts of Virginia. Maybe thirty miles away from here: Ivylands Manor.”

Rossi went to leave the room, “Lewis, you stay here. I’ll be back in a few.”

Agent Lewis turned back to face you, “You’ve been very helpful Y/N, if you could just give me a description of Ben for our sketch artist, we’ll be sure to let the courts know.”

—————————————————————————————————--

Spencer and Emily were deep in files when Luke and Rossi came rushing in.

“Emily, we have a problem.”

Spencer’s heart started racing, a million incidents rushing through his mind. He needed you to be okay, he couldn’t let the last thing he ever said to you be a threat. He couldn’t let the last thing he ever did to you be pretending he didn’t hear you say ‘I love you.’

Because he did. It has played on a loop in his mind ever since.

You were a criminal, an unsub, why did he still desperately want to kiss you.

“Ben is actually Ben Smyth, the Bandit.”

“As in-”

“The Gallagher murders? Yes.”

The Gallagher murders had occurred ten years ago. Over the span of six weeks, each member of the Gallagher family had been brutally murdered, one by one. It had started with the Father who had been shot through the head. At the time it had been assumed suicide. The family had grieved for two days before the youngest child, only fourteen months old, had been drowned in the bathtub in the middle of the night.

The murders went on and on until the only person alive was fifteen-year-old Bethany Gallagher. When she was taken, in the middle of a cold, harsh night, was ‘THE BANDIT’ written in blood on the wall.

The same exact crime occurred in nine other households across the country. The police never figured out who did it. It was a case that had driven Gideon mad.

There had been a partial fingerprint discovered at the seventh crime scene - the Miller family. It had been traced to a Ben Smyth, aged forty-seven. No one could track him down, though.

“Y/N gave us the address,” Rossi said.

“Get the SUVs. We leave now.”

Spencer looked up, “what about…”

“They’re coming with us. We are going to need the element of surprise. Y/N will be the bait.”

The next ten minutes were a blur.

Spencer was deafened by a sharp ringing sound in his ears as you emerged from the interrogation room. He could see your rigid face despite the awkward angle you are being held at. The bruised bags beneath your eyes were sunken, exhaustion etched into your features. Spencer could not comprehend how you still managed to look so beautiful.

JJ kept a hand on Spencer’s shoulder as you were walked to the changing rooms to be dressed in your old clothes and given an earpiece.

Emily reiterated the plan.

“Y/N will go in first and locate Smyth, closely followed by Reid and Alvez. The rest of us will hang back and watch the perimeter. Does that sound okay?”

There was a collective ‘yes’ from the team before getting into the black cars.

Luke sat in the driver’s seat, you and Spencer were in the back. You were still handcuffed.

“Tell me again, what I’m doing,” you asked him. You already knew the answer but you just wanted to hear his voice one last time - you had a feeling this might be the last time you saw him.

The SUV sped along the road, sirens flashing.

“You have an earpiece in?”

“Yes.”

“Agent Prentiss will feed you instructions as you enter the Ivylands. SSA Luke Alvez and I will be close behind you. We just need you to keep him distracted so we can arrest him with as few casualties as possible.”

You nodded wordlessly, staring down at your feet. Is this the end for us? You wanted to ask. You wanted Spencer to hold you and tell you it will all be okay. That tomorrow you will go home and watch Doctor Who or play a game of chess.

You could feel Spencer staring at you.

His large hand reached out and stroked your cheek before pulling the earpiece out of your own, repeating the same action on his own.

Spencer leaned in towards you and whispered, “I wish things were different.”

“But they’re not,” you breathed. “Do you love me?”

You needed to hear him say it for the final time.

“I-you lied to me, you tricked me. God, Y/N, you broke my heart.” He ran his hands through his hair.

“But do you love me?”

“I can’t!”

“It’s sad,” you sighed, tired of this game, “You ask someone about love and they tell you about heartbreak.”

The cracks in Spencer’s heart kept growing.

He remembered your first date, deep down he already knew he loved you then.

You’d gone straight from the cemetery to the cinema. You’d watched Die Hard, Spencer was enamoured with your grin that was plastered across your face throughout the whole film. It made him want to rush to the shops and buy the entire franchise. It was late December, fairy lights were hung in the streets and you bumped your shoulder against his as you tried to convince him why Die Hard is the best Christmas movie.

“It’s not even a Christmas film, there is no Santa, not even a Christmas tree on screen at any point!” Spencer had exclaimed.

“Blasphemy” you had laughed. “And you’re right, it's not just a Christmas film - it’s the Christmas film.”

You were like nothing he’d ever seen before, glowing under the streetlights.

That was when you had your first kiss, too.

He had whispered, “Can I kiss?” Watching carefully for any signs that you did not want to. When you nodded he instantly closed the gap between you, leaning down to press his soft lips to yours.

Spencer forced himself away from the memory when he heard you ask, “Spence…what would you do if I died today.”

Spencer was relieved you were interrupted by Luke stopping the car, and instructing the two of you to get out. The promise dies on his lips.

Just because he didn’t say it didn’t make it any less true: if you died today, Spencer would die tomorrow.

You and Spencer fixed your earpieces back in place.

“Ready?” Luke asked.

You could do this, you had to. You remembered when Ben had caught Beth trying to escape, he had made all the girls line up and watch him kill her. He had shot her in the heart. You would make sure he was arrested, and you would condemn him to life in prison - a fate worse than death. And you would do it for you. You would do it for Beth. You would do it for all the girls he trained to be killers.

You entered the large manor house alone. It had been years since you’d been here, within the blinding white walls. Still, you remembered your way around it like it was yesterday.

You’d practically grown up in Ivylands.

Ben would be in his office, you headed there first.

Hesitantly, you gripped the brass door handle and pushed the door open, it creaked loudly.

You weren’t sure what you expected when you entered the expansive room but it wasn’t Ben lying face down in a pool of his own blood. You rushed towards the body, falling onto your knees and rolling him over.

There was blood everywhere.

There was a hole in his wool suit, right above his breast pocket - evidently where he’d been shot.

Ben was dead. Dead. Dead. Dead.

There was a gun resting next to him, you grabbed it. Standing up and aiming it as examined the office.

“Y/N, what’s happening? Have you located Smyth?” You heard Emily’s voice in your ear.

You pulled the earpiece out, ignoring the smear of blood that was left along the side of your face.

Your lack of response prompted Luke and Spencer to rush into the room, adorning their FBI vests and guns pointed.

“Y/N L/N put down the gun. Now.” Alvez ordered.

Spencer was perplexed, “Y/N what are you doing? Put the gun down.”

You didn’t. You stood frozen.

“Y/N,” Spencer slowly approached you, arms outstretched, “what did you do? Why did you kill him?”

His firm grip extracting the pistol from your hands snapped you back to reality.

“No…I didn’t do this,” you protested. “Spence, please. It wasn’t me!”

It was futile, you could tell that neither of the men would believe you.

“Emily…” You vaguely heard Luke explain the situation to the rest of the team.

And then you saw it.

A flash of a figure by the entrance to the woods. Spencer saw it too.

You didn’t think. You just ran.

Spencer and Luke followed too.

The forest was silent until the sound of a gun cocking echoed throughout.

You watched a familiar girl with a dark mess of long curls aim a gun at you.

The last time you saw her, she was blonde…and dead.

“Beth,” you gasped.

Spencer recognised her immediately from the case files. “Bethany Gallagher.”

“No!” She shouted, “Don’t fucking call me that!”

“You killed Ben.” You stated.

Beth snarled, “Yes and he deserved it. He killed my family. He nearly killed me. You should be thanking me, I know what he did to you. I know that he was planning to kill you and your stupid boyfriend.”

You took a defensive step in front of Spencer.

That was a mistake. You should have considered all the outcomes of your actions before you moved but you were too distracted by protecting who you loved.

You forgot Luke was there until the shot was fired and he collapsed onto the muddy ground.

You ran over to him, applying pressure onto the wound. There was blood everywhere. Why was there so much blood?

Red was rapidly becoming your least favourite colour.

You looked back up to ask Spencer to get help but you were too late. Spencer was gone.

Beth had taken him and you would stop at nothing to get him back.

You waited for the rest of the team to reach you. JJ kept telling Alvez he would be okay and Emily’s hands replaced yours atop the gunshot wound when you forced yourself up.

You stared deep into the forest, in the direction Beth and Spencer must have gone.

Slowly, you picked up Luke’s gun and held it tight in your hand.

And then you started running.

A/N: Thank you for reading! The final part (five) should be up by the end of the week ◡̈

——————————————————————————-

If you would like to be added to the tag list comment or message me.

Taglist: @sackofpissandshit @ara-a-bird @princess-ofthe-pages @catsinaspacesuit @skull-centric @wrldofsage

#criminal minds #spencer reid #mathew gray gubler #mgg #criminal minds evolution #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #emily prentiss #tara lewis #penelope garcia #jennifer jareau #luke alvez #dave rossi

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samwilsonsbabymama · 3 years

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Bucky Pining Pt. 2

18+

Pairing: Bucky x Plus Size Black!Reader

Summary: Bucky tells reader what he thinks about when he stares at her

Warnings: smut... like nothing but, a bit of cockwarming, fluff, more smut

Word count: >800

A/N: I hope yall like this!!!

Prompt/Request: Continuation of this ask and from @mariahthelioness29 comment

I need one when Bucky is giving reader the D and telling her all the nasty ass shit he was taking while he was staring her. Please if you have the time and the inspiration

✨I don’t give anyone permission to copy/translate/repost/rewrite my work. Minors, DNI at all. ✨

“You’re staring again,” you mumbled as you awoke from your sleep.

More often than not, you were awoken by Bucky staring at you. You didn’t mind as much as you did when you first met him, but you still liked to call him out on it.

Bucky chuckled, “I can’t help myself, you’re just so damn beautiful.”

You sighed as he ran his fingers down your back, down over your ass cheek, and again as he hitched your thigh over his legs. You shifted your body so that you were straddling him, but you kept your head on his shoulder.

You loved laying on him like this, especially because it always led to him being inside of you. You laid still for a few minutes as he rubbed your back. You had almost fallen back asleep when he shifted under you causing the tip of his dick to nudge your opening. You pulled back and smiled as he chewed his bottom lip.

He watched as you sat all the way up and raised your hips and grasped his length. His eyes locked onto your hand as you stroked him before teasingly dragging your pussy lips over his tip.

“What do you think about when you stare at me?” you asked as you hovered over him.

His eyes blazed at your question but he didn't answer.

You slowly lowered yourself onto him and held yourself still once he was fully seated inside of you.

“Bucky,” you whispered. You dug your nails into his chest almost daring him to move inside of you. “Tell me.”

He groaned, because he knew that you weren’t going to move until he started talking.

“I think about how beautiful you are,” he gasped. He moaned loudly when you slowly began moving your hips.

“What else?” you asked. You kept your pace slow and steady.

“I think about the first time I saw you,” he continued.

“What about it?” you often thought about the first time you two met, about how he stared at you the whole time.

He kept quiet and growled when you stopped your movements.

“What about it, Bucky?” you repeated.

He groaned, “I think about how you took my breath away. I think about how I knew I had to make you mine. I think about how nervous you made me.”

You leaned down and kissed him deeply. You were so engrossed in the kiss that you didn't notice when he flipped you over.

“You wanna know what I think about when I stare at you now?” he asked as he began thrusting into you slowly, matching your earlier pace.

You nodded your head and wrapped your legs around his hips in an attempt to bring him closer.

“I think about how fucking lucky I am to have you,” he said before delivering a hard thrust causing you to throw your head back and moan loudly.

“I think about bending you over the nearest surface and making you scream my name,” he continued and you dragged your nails down his back.

“Fuck, y/n, I think about how I would burn down the entire world for you,” he said before he flipped you over again so that you were back on top.

“I think about filling you up with my cum over and over, yn,” he said as he watched your hips move. Bucky laid his hands on your hips and guided your movements.

“I know you were a bit insecure when we first met, and I apologize for making you feel uncomfortable,” his eyes were sincere and you knew he meant it. “I just couldn’t take my eyes off of you.”

Bucky began to rub your clit with his left thumb while his other hand stayed on your hip. His thumb stayed in sync with the speed of your hips as you rode him. You threw your head back at the feelings that he was pulling from you.

“I think about how beautiful you look when you're riding me,” he began to rub your clit a bit faster, spreading your juices around, and you clenched around him.

“I think about you cumming on my dick,” he urged.

Your pants filled the room as you rode him. You could feel your orgasm approaching quickly.

“I know you wanna cum, baby,” Bucky’s voice rumbled. “Cum for me so I can have another memory to think about.”

You locked eyes with Bucky and he smirked. “Give me one more, baby.”

Your hips stuttered as you came around him, pulling a ‘Fuck’ from Bucky’s lips.

“That’s my girl,” Bucky grunted as he came inside of you. He continued to rock your hips making sure you rode out your orgasm.

You leaned down to give Bucky another kiss, keeping him deep inside of you.

“You think about all of that?” you asked when you finally pulled back.

He nodded and smiled, “That and I plan our wedding sometimes.”

You blinked once, twice, three times as you processed what he had said.

“Don’t worry, baby girl,” Bucky said before pulling you back down. “I’ve got it all planned out.”

A/N: Please let me know what you think, either with a comment or a reblog. Thanks!

#bucky barnes x reader #james buchanan barnes x reader #bucky barnes x black reader #bucky barnes x black!reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky boo and you #maree writes

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iguessweallcrazyithinktho · 3 years

Text

𝑭𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒏 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕 2

Part one |

—Summary: harry starts tour off in Vegas; he invites you, his friend, to the show to support him. You stand in the crowd and watch him with so much proudness, harry notices you and he also starts to notice he loved you for a while.

—genre: fluff

—warning: altitude sickness, other than that nothing

—pairing: harry Styles x reader

Trope: friends to lovers

Gif from harrysimpact

I DON'T GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO POST MY CONTENT ANYWHERE

PLEASE COMMENT AND REBLOG

After Denver it was straight to San Antonio. You got loaded into the tour bus with harry and the band and started the short drive there.

The whole way there you and Harry spent time together. You watched a movie, chatted, painted each other's nails, and shared a ton of laughs. When you both weren't together for a short time Pauli would tease harry on how you both were literally in love with each. Harry would usually shake it off with a laugh, but he knew Pauli wasn't lying about that.

You arrived at the hotel and spent the day relaxing. Harry didn't see you the whole day, only a phone call in the morning and a text before bed. It kinda disappointed harry, but the next day before the show he got to see you.

You knocked on Harry's dressing room door. "Harry, it's me." Harry walked over to the door opening it for you. "Hey!" Harry pulled you into a hug with a kiss on the cheek. You chuckled. "Are you ready for tonight?"

Harry nodded. "Yeah, come in, I have to do a few things before I go on."

you walked into Harry's dressing room shutting the door behind you.

You too a seat on the couch and watched as harry fixed his hair in the mirror. "I'm so happy we're no longer in Denver. I got some altitude sickness while we were there and it was hell." Harry turned to you. "Not sure how they live there. Now how do I look?" Harry gave you a little twirl causing you to laugh. "You look amazing." You stood up and walked towards him. You smoothed out his sleeves and looked into Harry's eyes with a smile. "I don't know if you heard this from me yet but I'm very proud of you harry."

Harry smiled. "Thank darlin'." Harry wrapped his arms and hugged you. You pressed your head into his chest and smiled. When you pulled away you looked into his eyes. Harry smiled as he placed his left hand on your cheek, he used his thumb to stroke your cheek.

You looked up into his eyes, you did notice it before but there's a little brown I'm them. Harry mouth parted as he began to lean down. Your heart was beating 70 mph as he inched closer. Harry seemed hesitant but you didn't pull away which meant you wanted this.

As harry reached your lips a knock on the door was heard. "Harry your up in five minutes."

You pulled away and took a few steps from harry. Harry was flustered as he didn't get to kiss you. "Um.. I'm Sorry. You should get going." You mumbled fiddling with your now sweaty hands. "Yeah I should." Harry walked over to the door with you following behind. Before he opened it he turned to you. "Are you going to be in the audience again?"

You smiled at him. "Yes, of course I am. Remember to look at me ok?" Harry smiled. "Alright."

With that harry left and you both went your Separate ways.

During the whole show harry tried to avoid your eyes only because he didn't want to think about how he almost kissed you earlier.

When the show ended harry ran off stage and you were escorted back to the back. Harry was already in his dressing room as you walked back there. you knocked on the door and Waited for harry to answer. A few minutes went by before harry answered. "Hey." He said giving you a shy smile. "Hey, can I come in?"

harry nodded opening the door a little wider for you. "That was a great show tonight harry." You commented. "Thanks."

You looked at him. "You alright?" Harry nodded pulling his blouse off. You were meet with his tattooed body that every girl would kill to see close up. You were starting to get the sense that harry didn't want to see you right now.

"Okay, well I'll let you change. I'll see you later." You walked over to the door ready to open it. Before you could twist the knob harry called out your name. You turned around and looked at him. Harry Walked over to you. His heart was racing as he did, but he couldn't hold this feeling in anymore.

Harry took your cheeks in his hand before he leaned In and kissed you. You moaned as you fell back against the door. Harry tongue slipped into your mouth making your go frail. Harry hands feel from your face to your hips giving them a little squeeze. This was what heaven felt like you thought to yourself and you didn't want it to end.

Im going to make the next part a smut

#harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles smut #Harry Styles fanfiction #harry Styles x you #falling in love on tour

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hyunjilicious · 3 years

Text

a helping hand [henry cavill] - part 3

A/n: I know it took me ages, and I'm sorry, but it's finally here!! I don't know when part 4 will be up, but I know the plot, and by the time you finish reading this, you'll know it too!! Filth is coming. Also, since I posted the first 2 parts weeks ago, under the cut you'll find a small summary of what happened so far! Ofc, I'm linking the previous parts as well! Have fun reading, sorry for taking me so long, and please, don't hesitate to tell me what you thought! (I’ll reblog it with the taglist, otherwise it doesn’t show up in the tags!)

Summary: after Henry lost it during a fit of jealousy, he sneaked into your apartment, his actions having some very different repercussions from what he initially intended. SMUT 3.9k

Warnings: please be over 18!!! mentions of smut, masturbation (male receiving), sightly/some somnophilia, stalker-ish/obsessed Henry, cum play if you squint and ofc, mentions of filming and sharing pornographic material. 18+ please!!!!

You can find part 1 here and part 2 here!

Quick recap: Henry's crush on his very sweet and younger neighbour (you lol) grew into something else when you asked him for help with taking some pictures for your onlyfans account. Following this, your relationship reached a very teasing level, which prompted Henry to take matters into his own hands, even if that meant crossing some lines. So when he found out that you and a specific man from your past were on a voice call, he just had to know what exactly was being discussed. This jealousy fit had him using his spare key to enter your apartment and eavesdrop, and this is where chapter 2 ends. Have fun reading the next part!!!

“No” you sighed, waving your arms around, desperate to get your point across. But it was mostly useless, nothing even remotely decent would ever manage to penetrate Steve’s thick skull. He was a dumbass with a heart of gold, so you couldn’t even blame him for messing things up on purpose, you just learned the hard way not to take his advice under any circumstance. “No, Steve. I won’t do that. Not a chance!”

“Hun-” he scoffed, rolling his eyes as a smirk showed up on his lips, “When have I ever been wrong?”

“Really!?” you giggled and then sighed, “Listen, I gotta go to the bathroom and you’d better forget about this topic by the time I come back”

“Wait, wait. Ok, fine. Scratch that” Steve laughed, stopping you from getting up, “When have I ever been wrong on purpose?”

“Listen, I know you’re just trying to help” you smiled, “But I don’t think your experience in seducing girls with daddy issues benefits my situation in any kind of way”

“‘Course it does! I can give you some perspective!”

“Perspective on what?” you mocked, playfully frowning at him through the screen on your laptop, “You and Henry have nothing in common”

“The dick for one” Steve joked but when he saw you roll your eyes, he became serious, “I’m just tryin to help you hook up with the guy! That’s all”

“See!?” you laughed, already exasperated by the conversation, “I’m not trying to hook up with him, I want something more…”

Your sentence was cut short by the sound of a door closing. Your blood ran cold and your hands froze, eyes staring blankly into the camera.

“Y/n?” Steve asked with worry, “What’s wrong?”

“Wait here” you mumbled, pushing the laptop off of you and rushing to the door of your bedroom. You pressed your ear against it, and listened closely, the sound of a lock being turned chilling you to your bones. With shaky hands, you stumbled your way back to your bed, and looked into the camera, directly at a somewhat already worried Steve. “I gotta go-”

“Wait-” Steve tried to ask, “Are you-”

“Yeah, I’m fine, talk to you later” you hurriedly mumbled before ending the call. Your fingers flew across the screen of your phone, finding Henry’s name and pressing the green button in the blink of an eye.

And had he not been this utterly stupid and reckless, none of this would have happened. His impulsivity got the best of him, and panic rushed through his veins when he heard you were about to head to the bathroom. Pressure did him no good, and the first thing that came to mind at that point was to bolt out of there, knowing there was absolutely no way to explain what he was doing in your apartment. But his shaky hands were of no help, and the dexterity he earlier proved himself capable of was nowhere to be found. However, he didn’t care. He just stormed out, happy to finally breathe again as soon as he was out of your apartment - but when his phone vibrated in his pocket, he felt like dying all over again.

With your heart beating inside your throat, you grabbed your bedside lamp into your free hand, and curled yourself into a ball in the corner of your room, opposite to the door, the sound of the ongoing call being the only thing you heard over the loud buzz in your ears.

“Yeah?” Henry’s voice rang loudly when he finally answered, making you all but jump with fright.

Had you paid more attention, you’d have noticed he too sounded out of breath, but you were too out of it to tell. All you could think about was the psycho what was at your door.

“Henry-” you cried, voice shaky as the intake of air was no longer satisfying. You were hyperventilating, sweating from every pore, scared out of your mind.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice more stern now. “Y/n? Are you ok?”

“Yeah- yeah…” you said on autopilot, mind on standby. “No…” You whimpered, “Henry, can you- I think someone is trying to break into my house, I-”

“What!?” he gasped, “I’m sure no one-”

“Henry!” you cried into the phone, “Can you please look through your peephole? Please?”

He sounded confused, but you didn’t have to ask him twice. You heard a bit of shuffling before his voice reached your ears again, “There’s no one there, there’s no one at your door, you can relax”

“No-” you whimpered, unable to calm down, “Henry, please-!”

“I’m coming over right now,” he said.

“No! No, what if they’re still in the hallway?”

“There’s no one there, love” Henry tried to reassure you. When you heard him unlock the door of his apartment your heart stopped, but after that, everything was quiet.

“Are you ok?” you muttered, wiping your nose with your sleeve.

“Yes, love. I’m fine” Henry lightly chuckled, “I’m at your door, can you open up?”

“No” you scoffed, “What if someone got in?”

“No one got in” he tried to explain, but your adrenaline soaked brain refused to comply.

“Henry, take the spare key I gave you” you suggested, “And grab a knife”

Seeing how affected and terrified you were, Henry didn’t argue with you anymore. In a matter of seconds, you heard the door of your apartment being unlocked, Henry assuring you through the phone that it was him. When he walked inside, you remained hidden in your spot. He checked the kitchen and the living room, coming up to finally enter the bedroom. When your eyes landed on his massive frame, you breathed out relieved and rushed to him, throwing yourself into his arms. There was no other place on Earth you felt as safe as you did when he was holding you.

“Shh, you’re ok, you’re good” Henry cooed, cradling you to his chest, “I got you, baby, ok? I’m here”

But there was no stopping you. You broke down entirely, holding onto him as your legs gave in, turning into a mess. Henry carried you to the bed, sitting you down and allowing you to calm down at your own pace.

“I’m here, ok?” he asked again, rubbing your back, “I won’t let anything happen to you, Y/n, you know that. You’re safe, I got you”

It was impossible to tell just how long it took you to fully calm down, but it was safe to say that it would have taken hours longer had Henry not been there with you. When you were finally able to properly breathe again and hold a conversation, you looked up at him, big doe eyes hoping to convince him without too much of a fuss. “Can you stay here with me, please? I can’t be alone right now”

With nothing but sympathy in his eyes, Henry leaned down and kissed your forehead, “Don’t you think it would be better if we went over to my place instead?”

“No” you shook your head, “And leave the apartment unattended? I don’t think that’s a good idea”

His heart broke. Being his usual, impulsive self, Henry managed to break you down and terrify you to your core. As much as he wanted to reassure you everything would be fine, he couldn’t. He couldn’t just tell you it was him who broke into your apartment in the middle of a jealousy breakdown. So, he settled for the second best option, and really, he couldn’t complain.

It was late in the afternoon on a Sunday, no locksmith on the clock. Seeing how you’d have to wait until the next morning, he was more than happy to spend that time with you.

As time started to pass, you also started to relax.

The day slowly wilted a way, as both you and Henry made yourselves busy around your apartment. He wasted a couple of hours installing games on your school laptop as you took a bath, he then cooked you dinner, and by the time the night rolled around, you were your usual bubbly self again. And after watching and laughing your hearts out at Jack Nicholson in As Good As It Gets, sleep started to creep up on you.

Henry placed one of your kitchen chairs under the doorknob before turning to give you a massive hug, “No one can get in, darling. I promise”

“Thank god you live across the hall” you confessed, snaking your arms under his hoodie as you gathered yourself as close to him as possible. “What would I have done otherwise?”

“You don’t have to worry about that” Henry kissed your forehead, “I’ll always be here when you need me”

And in that moment, right there, stopping yourself from kissing him turned out to be the most difficult thing you ever had to do. Instead, you settled for his cheek, before hiding your face against his shoulder. “I’ll always be here for you too”

“Thank you, angel” Henry breathed out.

There really was nothing on this earth you loved more than this man.

Getting ready to go to sleep, you changed in your pajamas, while all Henry did was take off his hoodie. With your toothbrush lodged between your teeth, you lingered in the door frame, watching the muscles of his back flex as he bent down and put his phone down to charge.

Toothpaste and drool could very well have dribbled down your chin as you stood and gawked, only releasing you were staring when Henry turned around and a smile made its way up his lips. “Yes?” he laughed, but all you did was look him up and down, before returning to the bathroom with a shake of your head.

“Oh, Y/n?” Henry called again, following you, “Where can I find a blanket or some sheets?”

First you squinted, but then you decided it would be best if you just finished brushing your teeth before anything else. After rinsing your mouth, you turned to look at him, utterly unamused. “What for?”

“So I don’t have to sleep on leather?”

“You’re sleeping with me” you rolled your eyes, grabbing his elbow and dragging him into the bathroom so he could get ready for bed too. “Not up for discussion”

“Ok” Henry chuckled, looking at you in the mirror. “But I snore”

As if that would make you reconsider. You walked away and into your room, settling under the covers, without another word. About 10 minutes later, Henry joined you.

He fit in like a piece of puzzle and you didn’t even try to keep yourself from cuddling into his side. Sinking his head down between the multitude of pillows on your bed, you giggled, crawling on top of him. Without thinking too much about it, you kissed your way down his neck, peppering tens of kisses against his naked chest. You felt his heartbeat under your palm as he breathed in and out slowly, smiling down at you as he enjoyed the view.

“Thanks for doing this for me” you mumbled, rubbing your hand up and down his chiseled abdomen.

“Really, Y/n” Henry said, wrapping his arms around you, “There’s no need to thank me. Plus, you think I’m not enjoying this?”

“Oh shut up” you giggled. The amount of small talk that followed turned out to be exactly what you needed in order to allow your eyes to peacefully close. Despite the events of earlier in the evening, you now felt safer than ever before.

It was just a matter of time until soft snores started escaping past your lips, your chest rising and falling every so softly as you drifted out of consciousness.

But Henry’s mind was nowhere near relaxed enough to drift off. No. You were too close to him, too innocent and vulnerable for him to just let this moment pass. The way you had just thrown one of your legs over his lap drove him insane - your bare thigh too accessible to him.

At first, he just tested the waters. A peck to the top of your head, and a small caress against the back of your hand. You were completely out, and that accentuated his need further.

Slowly moving his free arm down his body, Henry brushed his fingers over his clothed member, grunting out loud when he felt the sensibility in his tip. He bit into his bottom lip out of need to keep quiet, teasing himself just a little as he struggled to decide how to go about things. With the way you were laying right now, it was next to impossible for him to free himself without moving you. And even though at the beginning he tried to avoid that, when you stirred in your sleep, your body rubbing up against his, he lost all kinds of patience.

As softly as he could, Henry pushed your leg back, just a little. Even in your sleep, you craved his touch, as when you felt movement, you involuntarily shuffled closer, but much to his relief, your legs remained on the mattress.

Eagerness controlled his actions as he pushed his pants down his thighs, propping his hips up with difficulty. When his underwear was pulled down and his cock sprung free, Henry hissed with unmatched satisfaction. With his hand wrapped around his base and his eyes on you, he swallowed thickly, his heart beating out of his chest with a demented sense of bliss.

"My baby-" Henry cooed, rubbing his lips across your hairline as he started stroking his cock.

His movements were slow but not calculated in any way. His brain was occupied, forcing his hand to work on muscle memory. But still, he teased himself, rubbing his thumb across his slit just like he liked to think you would.

The fear of getting caught was at an all time high as you stirred again. He froze for a second, "That's my good girl-" Henry whispered, looking down at your sleeping frame. As much as he wanted you to take an active part in this, he knew better than to risk it.

It was getting more and more difficult to breathe, his back sweating profusely as he pumped himself closer to the edge. His hips bucked, causing the bed frame to creak. Instantly, he stilled, eyes on you, but all you did was rub your cheek against his chest, completely unaware of your surroundings.

"I'm so close for you, my darling" Henry groaned, his throat paper dry as the words left his lips. All he could hear was his own breathing and the unmistakable perverse sound of slapping skin, but still, even above all of that, you kept on peacefully snoring.

The arm Henry looped around your frame was now traveling lower, his palm exploring your side until he reached your ass. He softly gripped a handful of your bum, squeezing hard enough to make up for the struggle of not allowing himself to finish too early. But it was reckless and maybe he shouldn't have done so, as his touch all but woke you up.

Still overwhelmed with sleep, you barely pushed yourself up, eyes closed as you slightly changed your position. You were now laying higher up his body, your head almost falling off his shoulder. Your breathing tickled the side of his neck as you snaked your arm up and looped it around his frame. Biting down hard on his bottom hip, Henry felt ridiculous amounts of blood rush to the tip of his cock as you refused to settle already.

Rubbing the tip of your nose across his jugular, still mostly out but not fully, you peaked your eyes open, “Henry-?”

“Y- yeah?” he swallowed thickly, freezing in his spot.

“Why’re you awake?” you mumbled.

“Just woke up- had a weird dream, that’s all”

You believed the lie without an ounce of doubt, “Wanna talk about it?”

“Yes” he whispered, “But in the morning. Sorry I woke you up, go back to sleep, darling”

“Ok” you sighed, kissed his bare shoulder and allowed yourself to drift off again.

Henry licked his lips in a haze, his eyes rolling to the back of his head as sweat worked his entire body. God, how he regretted getting himself in his position, but his cock was full on hard, all but leaking at the tip, not so patiently waiting to receive any kind of attention again. He sucked in a deep breath, eyes on you to make sure you were asleep.

His heart skipped a beat as your mouth popped open, but your light snores came as the strongest form of reassurance, and he resumed his work. The anxiety of getting caught fueled him, and the heels of his feet dug into the mattress, his hips bucking upwards as he furiously pumped his cock.

It was all getting too much. He was close. Henry threw his head back trying to suppress a moan, but he miserably failed. A choked back wail escaped his now dry lips as his whole body tensed. He squeezed you closer, his fingers lewdly digging into the sweet flesh of your ass. He was crossing many lines but that didn't stop him. He didn't see things clear anymore. His chest heaved, rushing up and down as he fisted his cock, biting into his lower lip as he watched your peaceful expression.

It was pure, dumb luck that he managed to spot a pack of napkins laying on the night stand mere seconds before he came. His juices eagerly ran down his shaft as he flew through his orgasm, his saviour napkin proving almost useless.

Coming down from his high, he all but managed to calm down, but his mind was still set. He would never get enough of you. And no matter how many times he'd cum, he'd still be down to go again. You had that power over him.

"Fuck…" Henry panted. And in the blur of the moment he created, he didn't even stop to process his thoughts. Gathering the few droplets of cum that landed on his stomach, he brought his hand up to your face, his thumb rubbing across your lips.

In that moment, then and there, when you unconsciously wrapped your lips around his finger, he almost lost it all over again.

"Holy-" he cried again, kissing your forehead. As eager and willing as he was to keep going, Henry stopped himself. He tucked the napkins next to the foot of the bed, pulled his pants back up his hips and settled under the covers.

Sleep didn't come easy, but he eventually drifted off. Unfortunately, the clock had almost struck 3am by the time he closed his eyes, and no later than 6:15, your alarm went off.

"No" you protested, wiggling around in search of your phone. "No school- no, thank you"

Eyes closed and cheek squished into the pillow, Henry raised his arm and found the phone with ease, handing it to you without a word.

Squinting under the bright light of the screen, you dismissed the alarm and snuggled back into Henry's chest, his arms wrapping around your body in an instant.

And as heavenly as this felt, it only lasted for about 5 minutes, until your alarm went off again.

"Just turn it off" Henry laughed, kissing your forehead, "I'll wake you up after I make breakfast"

"You don't have to" you protested, throwing in a whine or two as you curled yourself around him.

"I want to"

"No"

"Y/n…"

"Ok fine" you sighed, "Thank you"

"No need darling" Henry chuckled and stood up. He once again pecked the top of your head and then he was gone. About one second and a half later, you were asleep again, only to complain when Henry woke you up.

"It's 7" he stated, gathering the blanket in his arms and allowing the cold air to reach your body.

"Give it back" you cried.

"Is that how it's gonna be?" Henry threatened, and despite his dominating tone, you still refused to take him seriously. When you hid your face between the pillows, he deeply sighed, but satisfaction was still audible in his tone. "Fine then"

Taking you completely by surprise, Henry bent down and gathered you in his arms, throwing you over his shoulder with absolute ease.

"Henry-" you yelled, "The fuck-"

"Not gonna be late, Y/n" Henry laughed, "Not on my watch"

"God" you giggled along and allowed yourself to be carried to the kitchen.

As soon as he walked out of the bedroom, a delicious smell reached your nose. It was probably the first real breakfast you'd had in weeks, so you weren't going to complain anymore. Fresh coffee, toast, avocado, pancakes, hard boiled eggs and a multitude of veggies and fruit awaited on the table.

"I didn't even know I had all this food in my house"

"You didn't-" Henry shook his head, sitting down beside you, "Grabbed them from my place"

"You shouldn't have, but thank you"

"No need" he assured you, "Dig in"

When you were done, and right before you headed to the bathroom to get ready, you turned to him again. "Do you know the number of any locksmiths? I really wanna change the locks"

Following a quick Google search, Henry found a multitude of ads, and after choosing the most trustworthy looking one, he dialed the number as you patiently waited beside him.

Everything seemed to go perfectly well, until he frowned, "No, today pl- [...] No, I'm not locked out of my- [...] You sure-? Ok, ok fine. Ok, tomorrow, first thing, ok, thanks"

"They can't come today?" you pouted as soon as he hung up.

"No, I'm sorry" Henry shook his head, and seeing the disappointment plastered on your face, he spoke up again. "I can stay one more night, if you want to. I'll sleep in the living room-"

"What? No" you scoffed, "It's not that…"

"What is it then?" he questioned, starting to get worried.

You hesitated. "Its no-"

"Don't tell me it's nothing" Henry commanded, pointing a finger at you. A smile appeared at the corner of your lips as you rolled your eyes.

"Ok, fine. I just- I just had to film today for the- you know… That's all, but I can do it some other day"

Henry didn't answer until a smirk tilted the corner of his lips upwards. "Or I could help you?"

"Help me?" you gawked.

"Yeah" he nonchalantly shrugged, "Helped you once before, didn't I?"

"You sure?"

"Yeah" he smiled, "Only if you me want to, of course"

Your knees weakened and your heart was beating in all the wrong ways, so all you managed to do was giggle and shake your head in disbelief. "Well, yeah... I want to"

How were you going to tell him that the video was supposed to be of you fucking yourself with a baby pink dildo? And how exactly was he going to help? You had a long day ahead of you and the ridiculous amounts of school work you had to get done in the meantime didn't allow you to give these questions any kind of priority. All you wanted was for the evening to come around already even if you sweated profusely just at the thought of what was to come.

#henry cavill #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill smut #henry cavill x you #walter marshall x reader #august walker x reader #geralt of rivia x you

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juletheghoul · 3 years

Text

Oblivius Chapter 7

This is a CHONKY BOI. THE BACHELOR 'PARTY' IS HERE PEOPLE.

This is by far my longest chapter and I had most of it written before I even posted the second chapter of this story. Makes me SOOO happy how pumped all of you are to read this, it has taken over my life. Keep messaging! Keep sending me asks! 💖

Would love to do little drabbles, memories - anything to do with these two (except spoilers of course)

Likes & reblogs are appreciated

Frankie Morales x F!Reader

Pairing: Frankie x F!Reader

Word Count: 5.4K

Warnings: TW: INFIDELITY 👀 Angst, yearning, kissing, **18+ [no minors] SMUT** p in v (sex wrap it up) Oral, F & M receiving, language (Please let me know if I forget anything)

Masterlist Series Masterlist Prev Part Playlist

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Age 28:

“I just love her, I love her so much and there’s nothing I can do.” He was drunk and in a bad way.

“I know Fish, it’s tough from here but maybe when you get back you can talk to her.” He knew Pope was trying to make him feel better, but when he’d spoken to his mom earlier in the week and he’d heard that she was seeing someone- it had broken his heart.

He didn’t know what he’d been expecting - she’d never promised anything but he had this hope that she’d wait for him. That she’d be there to greet him with the love he’d always craved from her.

“She’s with someone else, I just want her to want me.” If he kept going down this road he was going to cry. He couldn’t cry here. Not in this bar and not when it was crawling with other soldiers.

“I think you should just talk to her when you get home, Fish - things might change when you see her again. Or do the grown up thing, and move on.” He looked at him, regret and heartbreak on his face.

“There’s no one like her.” He said it more to himself than Pope but he heard it all the same.

There was a pretty girl walking over to him now, a shy smile on her face.

“Hi - I’m Claudia - can I buy you a drink?” She wasn’t Spills, but she was very pretty.

-------------------

**Present Day**

The week leading up to the wedding was a blur. It simultaneously flew and crawled by. Schrodinger's week.

The dinner was coming up and with it a curious feeling was settling itself in your stomach. A strange mixture of desperation and acceptance. The acceptance told you that if Francis wanted to get married then you should keep your mouth shut and let him get on with his life.

The desperate, possessive part of you reminded you that he was your perfect match, that you shouldn’t let Claudia have him when he so obviously belonged to you. How would you accomplish that though? How could that be done without him hating you for ruining his wedding?

When you were sitting in the restaurant surrounded by the wedding party both those thoughts plagued you. They kept you quiet and pensive, present, but secluded within your own mind as they fought for dominance.

Benny sat next to you like always and you got the sense he was gearing up to make a move and you didn’t exactly know how to feel about it. Your mind was battling over that too.

Do I go out with him and try to get over Francis? Or do I turn him away, and keep pining over a soon to be married man? Choices.

Claudia was almost trembling with excitement, everything she said, everything she did was grating. It all irritated you and you felt the need to dampen her spirits. A malicious little part of you wanted to bring her down a peg. Maybe it was her attitude at the Bridal store. Maybe it was just plain old mean-spirited jealousy. With the dinner almost up, with the bachelor party still to come you couldn’t help it.

It was like a compulsion. The words crawled up your throat and the possessive, angry part of you had to spit them out.

“Oh my God Francis, remember our pact?” Your face was a mask of innocence - just reminiscing with an old friend.

Frankie’s expression changed then, from the same tentative joy he’d been wearing all night to something forced and fake.

“Barely.” His eyes were boring into you, the intensity seemed to be demanding you to shut up about it. While everyone else was still relaxed and unaware of the land mine you’d stepped on, you saw the look Pope was giving you, he knew.

“What pact?” Claudia asked with a breezy laugh.

“It’s silly really-” Frankie cut you off.

“It’s nothing, just bullshit we talked about when we were kids.” He tried to smooth it over with her but she didn’t like that. She sensed his hesitation and when Pope tried to engage them in conversation she challenged him.

“If it’s nothing, then Spills can tell me.” It was said with a bitter sweetness, she had seen through his avoidance and she wasn’t interested.

“Well, when we were in our early twenties - Francis and I decided to make a marriage pact.” You were smiling as though it was nothing and Claudia laughed along with you but you heard the edge in it. She wasn’t amused, and neither was Frankie.

“See honey? It was dumb. Just something dumb kids do when they don’t know any better.” He pulled her close but you could see the stiffness in the way she held herself. You didn’t expect his words to hurt you like that, and all of a sudden you regretted bringing it up.

What seemed like a good way to rile Frankie up was just a cruel little jab at a relationship that you didn’t belong in. A relationship that would go on despite you; in spite of you. You got quiet after that and you saw that he couldn’t bear to look at you.

The battle in your mind was over, and acceptance had won.

You quietly excused yourself to grab some fresh air, the shame at your ploy to ruin Claudia's night sat in your gut and you felt horrible. This wasn’t how you were raised, despite your feelings about her or Francis it was cruel to do this to her on the night before her wedding.

Fuck, now he’ll leave with her for sure. What have I done?

“Hey - thought I’d find you out here. You okay?” Benny had come out looking for you and you smiled at him.

“I’m okay - just needed a minute away you know?” He sat beside you and you tried to focus on him. On his handsome face, how tall he was. If you’d met him a few years ago you would have been all over him.

“Yeah I get that.” He scooted closer to you, until your legs touched and smiled at you. “Look, I know you’re close to Fish, but I’d really like to take you out.” He blurted out the words and you couldn’t help but let out a surprised oh!

He was smiling and he took your hand in his, he was looking at you intently now, making his move.

He was closing in and for a moment you forgot about your shame, about everything except Benny’s mouth. The kiss was soft, tentative. He was testing the waters with you and it was nice. His hand came up and rested on your face softly. Feather light touches on your cheek with the very tips of his fingers.

Objectively speaking, it was a lovely kiss, but it did nothing for you and he felt it.

“I’m sorry.” You rested your forehead on his and he sighed, the air moving the hair framing your face slightly.

“Don’t be, it was worth a shot.” he smiled sadly and you kissed him on the cheek. You both had your answer. The door slammed, breaking you out of your moment with Benny and you saw the back of Francis’ head as he stalked back inside.

----

He wanted to get drunk. He wanted to punch Benny, he wanted to knock his teeth out. He wanted to walk out there, grab Spills by the back of the head and kiss her until she finally understood what she meant to him.

When they walked in together his guts twisted up with rage, it clawed its way up his throat and instead of lashing out he ordered three shots of liquor to burn it away. He drank them quickly, one after the other.

“You and me, outside. Now.” Pope was dragging him away and he wanted to fight but Claudia was asking him what was wrong and he didn’t have an answer for her. Not one she’d want to hear so he let Pope drag him outside. He could see Spills staring at him and he couldn’t look at her.

“What the fuck are you doing right now?” Pope spoke calmly, but his voice had an edge.

“Drinking. It’s my bachelor party, I’m supposed to get drunk aren’t I?” He was pacing, the rage making him restless.

“Why are you marrying Claudia?” Pope stared at him.

“What are you talking about?” The question stopped him in his tracks.

“Do you think that no one can see it? It’s painfully obvious that you’re nowhere near as in love with her as you should be. You’re hung up on Spills and she’s obviously hung up on you.” He was trying to speak calmly and Frankie was pissed off all over again.

“It doesn’t fucking matter how I feel about her - she’s out here with Benny and I’m getting married tomorrow.” He was spiraling.

How the fuck did I get here?

“She’s out here with Benny, because you’re supposed to be getting married tomorrow. If you want to continue with Claudia I’m not going to get in your way, but get your fucking shit together and control your emotions. Figure out what the fuck you want and remember that Benny isn’t your enemy.” He approached him and clapped his arms onto Frankies shoulders. “Fish, you have to figure out what you want here, make it work with Claudia or let her go - stop this living in between shit. It’s not fair to anyone.” Frankie shook out of his grip, too upset to see reason.

He knew he was wrong, he knew he had no right to react this way but it was too much for him. All the little moments he’d thought they’d shared - what had they meant?

What does it matter? You’re getting married, she isn’t.

He ignored her gaze when he approached their table, Claudia was approaching him.

“You okay babe?” She was approaching him with open arms and he embraced her. Eyes closed - trying to feel something other than anger. He focused on the smell of her hair, on the feeling of being buried into the crook of her neck. She sighed loudly and ran her fingers through his hair, soothing and smoothing it out. “It’s just pre-wedding jitters babe, tomorrow everything will be perfect and we’ll be married.” She was whispering into his ear and it was meant to be reassuring.

He felt nothing.

You’re not her. No matter what you do, you’ll never be her and I have to be okay with that.

“I’m okay babe - see you tomorrow.” He kissed her, really kissed her. Tried to muster up whatever he thought he felt for her before and she responded but it was useless. All he felt was anger; she pulled away smiling and said her goodbyes. He glanced at Spills and the look on her face made him feel ashamed.

“Let’s get fucked up.” He said it with a fake smile plastered on his face and everyone except Pope and Spills cheered.

---

His hostility was astounding. He barely looked at you the whole night and you had a feeling it had to do with Benny’s kiss. You had to talk to him about it, a part of you hoped he’d be jealous and realize that you belonged together but maybe that was all in your head. Maybe he didn’t like his friends dating you, or you dating them but that didn’t make sense. Why would that bother him?

You’re the one getting married to someone else here, you dick.

Will and Benny were keeping up with him but as the night wore on everyone came to the realization that tomorrow would be a very long day if they didn’t quit now but Frankie wanted to keep the party going. He wasn’t belligerent, but he was being more aggressive than you’d ever seen. He told the boys that he wanted to continue drinking when they all got back to his house and they agreed but when you all got there it was obvious that Benny and Will were down for the count.

“I’m going to get these two into bed, can you make sure he’s okay and that he doesn’t get too fucked up?” Pope was herding the brothers into the basement where they’d been staying. He gave you a curious look then, a narrowing of the eyes that screamed talk to him.

---

When you walked into his old bedroom he was sitting on his bed, bottle of alcohol to his lips and you’d had enough.

“Francis that’s enough, you’ve had too much and you’re going to be sick.” You were trying to take the bottle away from him but he was stronger than you and he was in a foul mood.

“You don’t get to do that, you don’t get to pull that shit and then baby me.” His tone was vicious and you pulled back.

“I’m not trying to baby you, you asshole- I'm trying to make sure you’re not hungover for your wedding tomorrow.” He scoffed loudly at your words. “You got something to say Francisco?” You were angry now, his attitude was pissing you off big time. Your question set him off and he unloaded onto you.

“Oh I got plenty to say.” He put the bottle down and towered over you. “You fucked up Spills, you knew how I felt about you this whole fucking time and YOU were the one who shut it down. Making this stupid pact so you would be guaranteed someone who was crazy about you while you went off and did whatever and whoever you wanted and then bring it up in front of everyone like it was a joke.” The anger was burning away the alcohol in his system and there was nothing but raw honesty left. “And now what, you’re going to date my friend? So is it anyone who shows you attention except me?”

The expression on his face was angry, but there was a raw hurt in his voice. An old wound that he was blaming you for opening up.

“I have loved you since I was fucking fourteen, and you never gave a shit. You used me and you kept me dangling on a string but guess what, I am not a last resort. I have found a woman who loves me and you’re going to have to live with that.” The words were knives to your heart because for the most part they were true.

You couldn’t stop the tears at his onslaught of painful truths but underneath the hurt his words caused, you were fucking angry.

“You want to tear into me because I’ve been a fucking idiot fine, have at it, but you do not get to shame me for having a moment with someone who likes me. You’re getting married! Am I supposed to stay celibate and alone for the rest of my life because you gave up on me? I was waiting at the airport to tell you that I love you. That I know I’ve wasted time and that I want you.”

“Gave up on you? Are you fucking kidding me right now? So when I call to see how everyone is doing and I find out that you’re seeing someone - I'm supposed to just know that you’ll figure it out? I have been putting off finding someone in hopes that you’ll finally see how devoted I’ve always been to you. I am so fucking pissed off at you and you want to know what the worst part of it is? The fact that I still fucking love you. Even though I’m hurt and so goddamn angry. Even though I have her and I know she’s head over heels for me, you’re the one in my head. I still love you and seeing you like this is breaking my fucking heart Spills. It should be you I’m marrying tomorrow. It should have always been you.” You could see the tears in his eyes now and that hurt even more.

Every single fibre of your being screamed at you to run to him, to wrap your arms around him. Instead you responded with your own truth.

“I wish it was me tomorrow. I know I couldn’t expect you to wait for me forever but I don’t want anyone else. Benny is sweet but he’s not you Francis.” You were well and truly crying now. Everything you’d been holding in came bubbling up, spilling out of you and there was nothing you could do to stop it, it had to come out.

“I should have kissed you back like I wanted to. I shouldn’t have been afraid, I should have seen it and dealt with my own feelings for you. I’m sorry Francis. I’m sorry it took so long for me to realize how perfect we are for each other. I’m sorry I was too late and I’m terrified that you’ll leave me behind and marry her, and that I’ll be here waiting for you forever.” Your voice was cracking and high, barely a whisper at certain points with how hard you were crying.

His legs brought themselves to you in three long strides and then his mouth was on yours. Your tears mixing where your faces touched; pure adrenaline coursing through your veins when his hands buried themselves into your hair. It was nothing compared to the inexperienced albeit enthusiastic kiss you’d shared as teenagers. This was all-consuming. His mouth trapping your bottom lip roughly and biting softly to draw out a whimper. His tongue using the sound as the invitation to plunder the inside of your mouth.

He tasted like honey and alcohol, like the gum he chewed and tiramisu. He tasted like all the things you loved in this world and you never wanted him to stop kissing you.

He trailed his kisses down to the line of your jaw, the long column of your neck and up to the place beneath your ear and all you could do was frantically clutch at his hair.

“We’ve been so stupid Spills, driving me crazy.” He was whispering the words into your neck, his hands a vice grip around your waist.

“I’m sorry Francis, I love you - I love you so much.” The both of you couldn’t get the words out fast enough, fervent breathes as you kissed; both trying to make up for lost time. His wedding in a few hours was forgotten, his fiancé didn’t exist. It was just the two of you in his old bedroom where his first kiss had been denied.

You were rewriting that now.

His hands lowered and grabbed at the flesh of your ass roughly and you moaned into his mouth. He brought his kisses to your neck as he decisively pulled your dress up.

“I’ve been wanting to fuck you for half my life Spills, it was you I thought about while I was away. I would fuck my fist every single fucking night thinking about you letting me taste your pussy.” His eyes were dark with want and you gasped at his words, the alcohol and the honesty making him braver; the words were shooting directly into your cunt, making you weep for him.

“It’s always been you, look at what you do to me, what you’ve always fucking done to me.” He grabbed at your hand roughly and pressed into the sizeable bulge at his crotch. It was hard to form words. It was hard to articulate how you felt now that this was finally happening.

“Will you let me baby? Will you let me bury my tongue in your cunt? I want you to cum all over my face.” He was rubbing at your clit through your panties and it was like you were suspended in amber. Dumbstruck at his words, his confidence - his need for you.

“Yes Francisco, please.” You were gripping his hair frantically as he pushed you onto his bed. His big strong hands pulling your underwear down and tossing it over his shoulder. The same hands pulling your thighs apart to find your slick seeping out of you, all glossy and wet. He moaned at the sight.

“Look at that- so fucking pretty for me.” He made himself comfortable between your legs, grinding into the mattress as he studied your body. He kissed your thighs as he brought his face closer and closer to your clenching core. His facial hair tickling you as he trailed them up up up. You watched him propped up on your elbows, your hands automatically reaching out to run through his hair.

“Bet you taste so fucking good, like peaches.” He ran his finger along your seam, smearing your slick all over your lower lips. He was going too slow. You tried to move your cunt closer to his face but he smiled almost cruelly and held your hips down.

“My greedy girl.” He spread your lips apart and spit into your clit, you felt it sliding down towards your opening but he dove in cat-quick to lap it up before it went further.

His tongue was heaven. You threw your head back as he licked from your opening up towards your clit, over and over. “Eyes on me, I want you to watch me.” It was too much and you whimpered as he let the saliva drip from his mouth and into your clit. Focusing his tongue there, moving it up and down over and over and over. The wet glide of it too much and the string holding your sanity together was too tight, it would surely snap and let you float away soon.

He groaned onto your skin, his eyes steady on you as he slid two thick fingers inside you. Curling them in a way that had you tensing up. He could feel your thighs clenching as he scissored them inside you, stretching you open while his tongue pushed you over the edge. It was too much and when he wrapped his lips around your clit and gave it a long steady suck, you shattered.

He held you down and licked you through it. Lapping up the waves of arousal, drinking you down deep while his fingers pistoned in and out of you with a wet squelch.

You had to push him away.

“You taste so good honey, I wanna eat you for days, until you’re a wet little puddle in my bed.” He crawled up towards your limp body and kissed you roughly, his facial hair irritating your skin but it didn’t matter. Not when you could taste yourself in his mouth, not when he’d made you cum harder than anyone had any right to.

His hands were a blur as he tried to get his jeans down and you helped him. You could see your slick on his fingers, then his jeans and your hip where he held onto you. A little trail of you wherever he touched.

You frantically pulled both his jeans and his boxers down, his cock freed and bobbing between your thighs. You could see the sticky tip of him, angry and red with how hard he was and your mouth watered. You had to taste.

He was surprised when you flipped him over, the startled look on his face quickly replaced with a hungry smile. You took off his jeans and his boxes fully to lay between his legs. You rested your head on the strong muscle of his thigh as you lazily stroked him, the velvety skin of his cock encasing the iron beneath. He watched you with a look of rapture and his breath hitched when you pulled away to scoop some of your own slick from between your legs to make your strokes more fluid.

“You can’t possibly know how many times I’ve imagined this - fuck - give me your mouth baby, please.” He was thrusting up into your hand. You licked a wide stripe from the base of his dick up to the tip, circling it with your tongue. He groaned at the sight of you and he grabbed at the hair at the base of your skull to guide your movements.

You took the tip into your mouth and hollowed your cheeks prettily while he watched you, taking a bit more each time you lowered your head. You were ravenous for him, the soft sounds he was making, the control you had at this moment was intoxicating and it pushed you to take him further.

You took him as far as you could, swallowing around him as your nose brushed up against his curls and the tears leaked out when you let go to take a breath.

“Holy fuck baby, yes - look so fucking hot with my dick in your throat. Let me see you do it again.” He guided you down and you held there as long as you could before you sputtered and coughed, spit and his precum connecting your mouth to his cock.

“Fuck baby - so fucking good, if you do it again I’ll cum…” he left it up to you, taking his hand away from your hair and as tempted as you were to watch him come apart in your mouth your cunt was achingly empty and you needed him inside you.

“Next time you can cum in my mouth or on my face, wherever you want, right now I need you to fuck me.” You crawled up and he kissed you, he was frantic and he licked the spit off your lips and it was so primal you moaned. You found yourself on your back again and he was holding your thighs open while he rubbed his length through your folds.

“I’m going to cum inside you. I’m going to pump you full of me, fuck it into you. I wanna see it dripping out of you when I’m done.” He was lining himself up and when he slid in all the way, everything was right in the world. This was how it was supposed to be, the thick stretch of him was perfect, you were so fucking full - your cunt, your heart - every part of you.

“God baby, you’re so tight and wet - feels so fucking good.” He was speaking into your mouth and all you could do was wrap your arms and legs around him. Incoherent whimpers and sounds spilling out of your mouth with his movements. Sweat was beading on his brow, his fingers traced your hairline almost tenderly. His movements are equal parts filthy and loving.

His thrusts were hard and fast, not being able to control himself. You heard the wet, obscene sound of them and it made you wetter. You raised your legs higher, bracketing his ribs while he snapped his hips.

“I’ve wanted this for so long, love you - let me love you.” His words were curt and he wasn’t going to last long so you yanked the straps of your dress down. He leaned onto one arm, reaching down to rub perfect circles onto your clit while he took your nipple into his mouth. Your orgasm crashed into you out of nowhere and he groaned when he felt you clenching.

He brought his hand back up to grab at your hip roughly for more leverage while he fucked into you two, three - four more times before he was spilling into you.

He made good on his promise. He fucked his cum into you. A couple more shallow thrusts even though he was too sensitive and he watched himself do it.

“Look so fucking pretty like that, all puffy and full of my cum.” He watched as it slid out of you and down your ass onto the bedding.

Is this what I’ve been missing out on? Francisco Morales; sex god.

You were too blissed out to move but he went to work, taking off the rest of his clothes and then stripping you of yours. It was difficult to articulate how you felt in that moment, on the one hand this was everything you had wanted. The sex had been amazing, he didn’t just fill your body - he filled every single ounce of you. Your heart swelled when he tucked you into his side and covered the two of you with his blanket.

On the other hand, the postcoital bliss was wearing off and the implications of what had transpired was a weight growing in the pit of your stomach.

Your body and heart wanted to soar; a kite flying higher and higher. Your conscience was the string, and it was being shortened fast. He loved you, he still loved you even though he was engaged and he’d been thinking of you the whole time. You wanted to cry with happiness; with guilt as well.

The guilt was present, reminding you consistently that this man was supposed to be getting a good night’s rest for his wedding tomorrow. Instead the two of you were laying in bed, curled around each other. His spend slowly seeping out of you.

It was hard to focus on it though, especially when his skin was so warm under your cheek. When his hand rubbed at your arm and your legs were a tangle underneath the blanket. You couldn’t help but reach up and run your fingers through the hair matted on his forehead and he made it even harder when he captured the same hand and pressed kisses to your fingers. He broke the silence before you could though.

“I’m still pissed off at you.” He had a dreamy look on his face despite his words.

“I know. I’m pissed off at me too.” You buried your face into the crook of his neck, breathing him in. The scent of his body-wash mixing with his own sweat. You couldn’t get enough and he curled himself into you as you ran your fingers through his hair. Your hands are constantly moving, touching every bit of each other you could.

“We’ve wasted so much fucking time Spills.” There was a deep sadness in his voice, it sliced into you because you knew he was right.

“I know Francis, I’m sorry it took me so long.” You were scratching at the wiry hairs on his cheek, trying to map out the face you loved so much. He sighed loudly. “What's going to happen tomorrow?”

“I don’t know - part of me thinks I should pack up the truck, throw you in the back and drive away. Another part of me wants to forget this whole thing happened and follow through on the commitment I made.” He wasn’t holding back with his words or feelings and although they hurt you couldn’t force him to do anything he didn’t want to do. You kept quiet, at the end of the day the decision was his. “I have to tell her the truth. I have to tell her that we did this, I cannot show up there tomorrow and pretend like I didn’t.”

You could see the guilt on his face now, the implications dawning on him a little later than they had for you. He scrubbed at his face with his hand and groaned.

“How can I just break her heart like this?” He was spiralling. “She doesn’t deserve this.” You felt like an intruder then, suddenly the closeness wasn’t there, he was pulling away from you emotionally if not yet physically.

“What do you want to do Francisco?” The use of his full name snapped him out of his train of thought and he looked at you then.

“What do you mean?” He looked at you in confusion, as you pulled away from him reluctantly.

“I know it took me way too long to get to this point, and you have every fucking right to hate me. If you tell me now that you want to make it work with her I’ll support your decision. I’ll keep my mouth shut and we can pretend this never happened. I would do that for you because I love you, and I will no matter what. You tell me what you want to do.” The tears were coming down your face as you said the words and as much as it hurt to get them out you meant them.

You couldn’t stay here - you wanted him to make his choice without influence and he said nothing as you quickly dressed and walked out of his room, instead you lay on the couch in the living room, crying softly to yourself. Sleep was nowhere in sight and in a few hours, you’d know for sure what would happen.

----

Tag list: @frannyzooey @foli-vora @danniburgh @sambucky21 @greeneyedblondie44 @lola4pedro @ezrasbirdie @221bshrlocked @artsymaddie @supernaturalgirl20 @sleep-tight1 @softdindjxrin @wheresarizona @sherala007 @freak-nasty-thick-dick-mando @marydjarin @cannedsoupsucks @thirstworldproblemss @ilikechocolatemilkh @lori-tovar @freeshavocadoooo @hrk-fic-recs @greeneyedblondie44 @maxwell--lord @princessxkenobi @the-feckless-wonder @kirsteng42 @girlimjusttryingtoreadfanfics @thisshipwillsail316 @feministfanboi @dihra-vesa @gaiuswrites @stevie75 @sweet-creature98 @readsalot73 @tobealostwanderer @elegantduckturtle @diogodxlot @alczysz17 @evyiione @absurdthirst @beskarboobs @andruxx @littlemissoblivious @1800-fight-me @goldielocks2004 @maievdenoir @gracie7209 @omlwhatamidoinghere @bellaorisa @hellovanessax @magikfanatic @frankiecatfish @mrs-ghuleh @pedritoispunk @librariantothejedi @studythoreauly @missswriter @prostitute-robot-from-the-future @pintsizemama @mswarriorbabe80

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rose7420 · 3 years

Text

Snow Days

Loki and little Y/n take a day out in the snow, and Loki is scared Y/n will see his true form... requested from @lokiismyhubby

Y/N shivered in powdered, icy snow. Earlier in the day she had begged Loki to take her outside so she could play and experience the frozen precipitation.

Loki was reluctant about her wish.

Very reluctant.

At the current moment, he towered above her tiny form that was in between his black boots. For such a powerful god he looked harmless in his current attire. He wore more than two layers for each article of clothing claiming he was sensitive to the cold. He resembled the looks of an Eskimo. She smiled as she remembered her earlier teasing.

Unfortunately, Loki hadn’t let up on her layers either. Forcing her to wear even more things than him, she’d practically waddled out like a duck with the amount of clothing she wore. Loki had been pinching out another coat for her to wear, ready to force it upon her upper body if needed when she pleaded for him to let up. He had thankfully relented.

Now, his attention wasn’t on her, however. He seemed to be worried about something as his gloved fingers twitched every so often and that crease on his forehead was even more pronounced than usual.

“Are you okay Loki?” Y/N asked from the far-below ground. He paid no mind to her question, most likely because he couldn’t hear her. That was very unusual, for he had superior hearing to even the borrower herself who was gifted with sensitive ears to watch out for predators since the world was a very big place to a tiny thing like her.

“Loki!” She yelled, her hands cupped around her mouth attempting to amplify her quiet voice.

Still no answer.

She was getting rather cold on the frigid, frozen ground so she walked close to Loki’s left boot and placed a hand upon the leather ready to get his attention. But then an idea came to mind.

She gathered a sizeable snowball that was bigger than her fist and tapped Loki’s boot hoping the sensation would catch his attention. As hoped, he did spare her a glance and kneeled down to see her better, ready to offer a palm. Once his face was closer she readied her throwing arm and launched the snowball towards his face.

It landed on his cheek, barely making him flinch until he felt the coolness of it.

“Why did you have to do that?” He snarled, scaring Y/N. Panicking, Loki stood up momentarily forgetting about the borrower below him.

Y/n backed away from him trying to get out of the pathway of his fury and his boot. Right in time too as she saw the sole of his shoe flatten the snow where she had just stood. Her heart pounded with fear. She craned her head way up to see his face but he was covering it with both his hands.

“Loki, I-I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings.” Y/n apologized.

Loki heard Y/n and worried she’d see him for what he truly was… a monster.

He couldn’t lose the only friend he had and wanted.

“Get away Y/n!” He yelled.

His loud voice frightened her. He never yelled. Especially at her. Y/n backpedaled falling into the deep snow. She fought to get back up but the snow was too deep and she too small. She began to cry as she realized she had messed such a good day up by a simple snowball.

Loki heard whimpers and sniffles. He peeked through his fingers to peer down at Y/n but when his eyes scanned the snowy ground her he caught no sight of her. His heart jolted, and his chest was tight with fear when he fell down to his knees searching the cold snow for his tiny friend.

“Y/n! Where are you?” He called. The whimpers before had quieted and the only thing to greet him was silence. His fingers desperately combed through the snow. She was tiny as ever, so vulnerable to the elements. She’d surely die if he didn’t find her in time.

Nothing.

There! His cold digits made contact with a warm object. He scooped her out and scanned her form for any harm, then held her tightly to his chest. Her breath was even as if she had passed out. He tenderly pet her hair with a gentle finger to awaken her.

“Loki?” She croaked.

His hand bearing her was about to raise her to his face when he remembered why this incident had happened in the first place. He held still. Y/n squirmed in his hand that had formed a barrier to properly see his face. She climbed his fingers, latching onto the tip of his middle digit pulling herself up. She felt him shake his hand causing her to fall back down into his cupped palm.

“Loki!” She scolded.

Loki knew he had to show his friend who he truly was. It was not fair to her to hide back his true character, what he was meant to be. He raised his hand to his face and uncurled his fingers. He watched Y/n with apprehension as her eyes landed on his face gazing upon the blue of his skin paired with the indented lines. He waited for the fear to show, to become palpable.

But it never did.

She extended her arms out as if she wanted to touch it.

“A-are you not afraid of me? Do you not see who I truly am?” Loki asked, astonished.

Y/n crossed her arms and sassily replied: “All I see Loki is that your skin changed colors and that you have really cool lines on your forehead. Can I touch it?”

Loki couldn’t help but laugh. Y/n saw who he truly was, and didn’t just tolerate it but liked it. He felt relieved and happy.

“Well normally if you were to touch it I could harm you,” Loki informed Y/n.

“Well… if it does hurt me or whatever I’ll stop!” Y/n retorted.

Loki knew there was no way he could say no, Y/n was a stubborn thing. He raised her carefully to his forehead, holding still as her tiny hands ran across his skin. He closed his eyes and relished the little massage.

He felt Y/n jump off his hand and onto his shoulder.

“Hey! What did I say about doing that? You could get hurt and fall!” Loki scorned her. Y/n just shrugged and snuggled into the shade of his jacket hood up close to the uncovered skin of his neck, the blue tint receding and reverting back to his usual pale tone.

“Hey, no rush big guy but we may wanna head inside cus I think it’s about to snow some more and I can’t handle another one of your hissie fits,” Y/n said, completely ignoring his scolding.

He rolled his eyes and smiled trekking his way back to the little cabin they called home.

Later on, when Loki sat on his recliner, and Y/n in her own she thought of something.

“Loki you asked me if I was afraid of you out there. Why?”

Loki took a sip of his hot chocolate and looked at Y/n questionably.

“Isn’t it obvious?” He asked confused setting down the mug lightly to not jostle Y/n.

Y/n bit her lip and pondered the words she wanted to use. “I mean maybe to normal people it may be unusual but to us not really, you know? I mean look at me! I’m smaller than your thumb and escaped HYDRA.”

Loki gave her an intrigued look so she continued.

“My point is Loki, is that I know what real monsters look like. And you are not one of them. Sure we may be a bunch of weirdos who turn blue and need therapy but we are good weirdos. I just want you to know that.”

Loki smiled at her. Y/n stood up from her chair and jumped over to his arm resting on the side of his chair.

His smile changed into a frown and was about to scold her again but before he could she hugged his wrist. He pried her off, holding her waist between a finger and thumb and setting her on his shoulder where he herded her close to his neck in a makeshift hug.

“Well then, you are certainly my favorite little weirdo.”

If you enjoyed reading please reblog and leave a like!

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#giant loki #snow days #fluff #g/t #giant/tiny #gentle giant #male giant #female tiny #borrower #loki x borrower #tiny reader #angst

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vivianweasley · 3 years

Text

Pride and Prejudice (Chapter 6)

Summary: Your father is Lucius Malfoy’s cousin, and after the war, it was really difficult for you to find a job because of your last name. So your mother and Mrs. Weasley came up with a crazy idea. A fake marriage between you and Fred Weasley.

Last Chapter! (I combined the last chapter and the epilogue cuz they are not too long.)

Pairing: Fred Weasley X Malfoy!Fem!Reader

Warnings: food mention, mention of divorce, people pretending to choke, proposal.

Word Count: 1.8k

Disclaimer: photos used in the header are from Pinterest. Credit goes to the original owners.

Please do NOT repost or translate my work on any platform! Thank you! Reblogs and comments are always welcome:)

Pride and Prejudice Series Masterlist

Fred walked downstairs, noticing a faint smell of apples in the joke shop. “So are we selling apple juice now, Georgie?” he joked.

But George looked confused, “What apple juice? I could only smell caramel-” And then the answer finally came to George, “Amortentia!”

Fred followed George to the shelf displaying amortentia and immediately realized a firecracker just exploded next to this shelf, causing at least four bottles of amortentia to break and the love potion inside to spill.

George waved his wand and cleaned up the mess, but a satisfied smirk soon appeared on George’s lips, “Strange. Didn’t know you liked apples this much.”

“Shut up and go back to work!” Fred raised his voice, covering for the fact that he’s a complete mess now.

That fainting smell of apple that’s still lingering in the shop also had a dash of the scent of book pages in it. And this combination could only remind Fred of one person.

You.

The person whom he married out of a dare. The person who he fell in love with during the process. The person who just walked out of his life.

George noticed the change in Fred’s expression. How defeat was now written all over his face. “Mate, you need to do something. You can’t just let her walk away like that.”

“What can I do?” Fred sighed, “Maybe she’s been waiting for this all the time.”

George sighed with Fred. This wasn’t like his brother. Soon the lingering smell of amortentia caught his attention, and a brilliant idea popped into George’s mind. “She has feelings for you too, and I can prove it to you!”

You pushed open the door of the joke shop. George just called you claiming that there’s an emergency, so you rushed to the joke shop immediately after work.

George approached you with a small glass vial, “Y/N, this is the new perfume I just made. I need your opinion.”

So this is the emergency??

You looked at George, couldn’t decipher what his smile meant. But you did know one thing. In fact, everyone who went to school with the twins should know the rule: be careful of what they handed to you. So you stepped away from that vial and asked with caution, “When did the joke shop start selling perfume?”

“Oh, we are always trying to expand our business,” George noticed how you became alert, so he added, “I swear to Merlin, this is not a prank!”

Still finding his smile suspicious, but for Merlin’s sake, you still decided to take the vial.

“Does it smell good? What does it smell like?” George asked carefully.

“Hmm...” The perfume did smell very good. You could smell the sweetness of cinnamon, a dash of gunpowder, but it also smelled so familiar. It smelled like...Fred’s cologne? “George, I’m pretty sure someone else has already made a perfume like this.”

“Really? How so?” George felt his heart beating at his throat, so scared that you might say another person’s name.

“Isn’t this just Fred’s cologne?” You were finding this unbelievable. How could George not recognize his own twin’s cologne?

“Oh really!!” Hearing a definitive answer from you has made George so happy that he pulled you into a hug. “Got it! Thank you for your opinion! You’re the best!”

“You’re welcome...?” Watching George being so happy that he could start dancing at any minute, you were beginning to think that the chemicals in the perfume were toxic. How could making a plagiarized perfume make a man so happy?

Two days later, you apparated to the joke shop again. It was raining outside. Maybe the weather was trying to set the tone for what was about to happen next. After taking a deep breath, you knocked on the door of the twins’ apartment, the apartment that you called home for the past year.

Fred opened the door, letting you in without saying a word. You tried not to look at him so you could appear indifferent and won’t be affected by his expressions.

“Here’s the divorce document,” you said as you took out all the paper in your bag. He took the documents and flipped through the papers quickly, still not saying anything at all.

You couldn’t tell if his silence meant he’s also not ready to say goodbye or he just had nothing to say to you. But you tried not to overthink as you continued, “Oh, before you sign it, you still have one wish left. What do you want me to do?”

“What if I said,” he finally looked at you, his eyes capturing yours, “I don’t want you to go?”

His words were like a drum in your ears, rendered you speechless. Before you could fully process what he just said, Fred continued, “It might sound crazy, but for the past few days, I realized I just couldn’t imagine a life without you anymore. I know I’ve lived 20 years without you perfectly fine, but now that I’ve had you in my life, I don’t ever want to live without you again. I know I could be insensitive sometimes, and I probably did something stupid that made you mad in the past year, but I’m willing to change if you tell me to.”

“All I’m trying to say is,” he took a deep breath and continued, “Please allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you. And please don’t divorce me.“

You finally let out a soft laugh. That’s Mr. Darcy’s line in Pride and Prejudice. You remembered reading this part to him during Christmas, and you couldn’t believe that he actually memorized this line.

Fred panicked when you weren’t talking, “But of course, if you really want to, I wouldn’t stop you. I-“

“You know, you don’t have to use your last wish on this,” you stopped him, “I was going to say yes anyway. But If you insist, that won’t be a problem with me.”

Fred’s eyes widened as he processed your words, “Wait, does that mean-“

You answered his question by pulling him down and pressing a kiss on his lips. He was shocked by your sudden action but soon kissed you back with his hands finding your waist and pulling you closer to him.

So this is what it feels like to kiss him, and it’s so much better than how you’ve imagined it would be. It started a soft kiss but soon became more passionate, as if you were making up for all the time you two spent on being oblivious.

“Should’ve done this earlier.” A smirk appeared on Fred’s lips when you finally pulled away.

“Idiot,” you rolled your eyes, but your cheeks were still heated.

He chuckled before giving you another soft peck on the lips. His hands were still resting on your waist.

“And you’re still this idiot’s wife.”

～(warning: people pretending to choke, food mention)~

“Y/N, there’s a Mr. Weasley looking for you,” the receptionist raised her eyebrows and smiled at you.

“Thanks! I’ll be done in a minute!” You quickly finished the last sentence and looked at Luna from across the table with your puppy eyes.

She chuckled, “Alright, you can leave early today.”

“Thanks, Luna, you’re the best!” You flicked your wand to pack up your bag before running to the door.

“Tell Fred I said hi!” you heard Luna’s voice behind you.

“I will!”

A month after your fake marriage ended, you quit your job at Whizz Hard Books. You didn’t want to work in a place that wouldn’t accept who you really are.

Ginny introduced you to Luna Lovegood and The Quibbler. You immediately fell in love with the whimsical ideas and style of The Quibbler, and Luna gave you a new job as you two hit it off very quickly. So this is where you work now. No need to hide your background and use a fake last name. This place accepted you for who you are.

Fred was at the door, opening his arms when he saw you running to him. “Happy one-year anniversary, darling!”

You giggled as you ran into his arms, “and this time, it’s real.”

“Yep,” he pressed a kiss on your forehead, “ready?”

You nodded, and the next second you two apparated to your favorite restaurant.

The dinner was delicious, and for dessert, Fred ordered your favorite cake. But when you were enjoying the cake, you suddenly felt something hard inside. This was extremely dangerous, for you could’ve swallowed it if you weren’t paying attention. You were just about to complain when you finally realized what it was.

It’s a ring!

You were surprised. Was Fred trying to propose? But last time you checked, you two were still legally a married couple.

But this also seemed like what he would do on your one-year anniversary. You were sure he was waiting to see your surprised face, and an idea soon came to you.

You pretended that you were trying to pick up your spoon because your elbow “accidentally” swept it down on the floor a few seconds ago. When you were sure Fred couldn’t see you, you slid the ring on your finger. Then you got up and took another bite of the cake like nothing out of the ordinary happened.

A few seconds later, you started coughing. Your brows were furrowed as your hands reached for your neck like you just choked on something.

Fred was freaking out, knowing that he’s the reason behind all this, “Darling, are you alright?”

The only response you could produce was a few glottal sounds and you looked like you were almost crying.

Fred ran to you as fast as possible. He wanted to help, but he had no idea what to do as his brain was in an absolute mess now. The only thing he could manage to do was apologizing again and again, “I’m sorry. It’s all my fault. I shouldn’t have done that. Baby, I’m so sorry…”

The noise you two were making attracted the other customers’ attention, and you saw a waiter approaching you with his wand, trying to help. You knew it’s probably time to stop this prank.

“Are you talking about this?” You finally stopped acting and waved your left hand in front of him.

Fred’s expression froze, still trying to recover from the terror of accidentally hurting you. After a few moments, he finally realized, “Wait, does that mean…”

“YES!” You chuckled.

Fred’s furrowed brows finally unfolded as a bright smile appeared on his lips. He picked you up and spun you around, “She said YES!”

The crowd around you was clapping and cheering while your husband was cheering himself as well.

You giggled, “Freddie, you know we never went through with the divorce, right? So technically, I’m still your wife.”

“I know, darling, but I figured that I owe you a proper proposal,” he said while pressing multiple soft kisses on your face, “Plus, I just want to make this official. I love you, darling.”

“I love you too,” You smiled as your lips found his again, “I love you most ardently.”

A/N: I can’t believe I really finished this series asdfgfgjk Thank you guys so so much for reading, reblogging, commenting, and liking this series. I can’t tell you how much your support means to me❤️

Series Taglist: @ifilosemyselfagain @theweasleytwinsgirl @bookworm06 @unabashedbookscollector @txtdreamss @sagittarius-flowerchild @rsheridan @ovrwd @anywherebuthere @allaroundaddict @jeminila @secretsofageek @magical-spit @freddieweasleyswife @lilypad-55449 @hufflepuffzutara @honey-honey-5644 @kyloren-peterparker @treblebeth @kyloren-peterparker @fred-sux @rodrickmalfoy @liliputbahn @its-yasbxtch @daydreamgirl8 @305weasley @awritingtree @lucymfer @bberree @malfoy-wife15 @weasleyxmalfoyxstyles @justfollowtheroad @nojamsonmytoast @amc723

(If your name is bolded, Tumblr wont let me tag you. And I’m really sorry if I forgot you!)

(General taglist in reblogged post cuz it can’t fit in one post)

#fred weasley #weasley twins #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley fanfic #fred weasley fanfiction #fred weasley series #fred weasley x malfoy!reader #harry potter fanfic #harry potter fanfiction

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thefallenbibliophilequote · 3 years

Text

Bad Blood

Loki x Reader

1989, chapter 8

"She made friends and enemies"

Summary: It's hard to find the one, but even if you do find him it's always going to be a daily struggle to make it work. Can you even make it work after he broke your heart? The answer to that is complicated, but it all started when you found each other again in the stark Tower- and that's where our story begins.

Word count: 4,601

Warnings: language, sexism if you squint, angst, torture(Bucky style with needles and blood and knives etc), and a little fluff- not in that order.

A/N: I'm sure you guys will hate me after this. Sorry in advance? I'm saying this again- remember the timeline from the last chapter and this one...

A/N 2: thank you for @peterbenjiparker for helping me outline this chapter! And thanks to @chrissquares for the dividers! And of course to @nacho-bucky for reading this over!

No one is allowed to repost my writing or steal or copy my work! Reblog on tumblr is fine.

Series masterlist

Song on Spotify and YouTube

The pain in your head almost pulled you under and out of consciousness with the way your body felt heavy and all the- were they hands? That seemed to touch you. You shivered when you felt a spark of electricity travel through your body and your eyes shot open.

There was a blinding light directly from above you and both of your sides but after a couple of moments you managed to see through that. You saw the agents, the building, the chair you were seated in with equipment you did not know but you did not want to find out what they do. When they noticed you were awake, two men walked to you.

Mike was standing on the side, grinning, while the doctor from the warehouse seemed to look you over.

"And she is awake." His voice wasn't charming anymore, now it just sent red alarms in your brain. "She looks so cute asleep."

In a glare you looked at him and he fell to his knees in the agony that overtook him, his eyes were hazy and you wanted to make sure it hurt.

"Put her under!" the doctor yelled and a searing electrical pain ran through your body and instead of his yelling in the room, it was now filled with yours. You didn't hear anything anymore and then all you knew was black. Your body jolted in its place despite the restraints before it went limp.

"When are you guys going to solve the problem?" Doctor Zazu laughed at the remark.

"What problem?"

"Her powers, they are intense and harmful! When she wakes up again, this will keep happening!" the doctor looked at the young agent who was struggling to get up and shook his head, he was still young.

"That's not the problem- that is the solution!"

"How the hell is that a solution? We can't use her until we make her under our control." Mike looked over at you. "Besides, it took years to make the Soldat."

"We are making advances on detecting her powers, and with the new technology and knowledge that we have now, we will be able to overpower her. I doubt she will make such a fight, especially with what you've told me."

"She was quite fun, certainly worth working there for as much as I did."

"I'm glad you enjoyed her, now it's my turn to toy with that brain of hers." He stood at the railing and watched as agents prepared the room that will soon be yours, and the staff that stood proudly just outside of it.

•

Three months ago in Asgard…

"This is such a blessed day to unite the lovely couple!" Lady Iyllir's mother raised her glass during breakfast. It'd been mere hours since Loki knocked on her door and here he was sitting at the long table with his father and Iyllir with her family.

Glasses clunk against each other but they only made Loki wince when he came back to the reality of the situation.

"Indeed it is, I am glad we will be uniting the families soon enough," his father then looked at him. "And I am happy it worked out as it should've."

Loki couldn't speak against Odin. Your voice was haunting him and you were right- he could get away from this if he wanted to, but he can't. He needed this too much even if he didn't want it.

"We are so excited! Right, Loki?" the girl looked at him with bright eyes her ginger hair was just as bright. He nodded and spread a smile.

"Of course, my dear, I look forward to it." She gave him her hand and he was a proper prince after all, so he raised her hand to his lips and gave her knuckles a gentle kiss.

"When shall we do the wedding?" Iyllir's parents talked to Odin more than Loki and the girl who sat behind him.

"We could have it soon, I'm sure we are just as eager to have this wedding just as the two lovers are to getting married." The father talked to Odin.

"Actually, father-" Iyllir quipped up and he felt her hand tighten around his. "I thought we could have it a couple of months from now, the flowers will be the brightest then."

"Dear, don't be silly the flowers are still pretty now." Her mother shook her head at her.

Before she could go further, Loki spoke instead of the girl.

"Shouldn't the bride decide how her own wedding will be designed?" the mother in front of him smiled nervously.

"Of course, Prince Loki, you are right."

With this the conversation went into planning the wedding which left Loki only half listening.

"I want it to be golden, we can even have our clothes be of such too!" he heard her before zoning out of the conversation. Breakfast ended soon after, with a promise from Odin to send maidens that'll be at the Lady's disposal for any wedding idea she wants.

Loki was walking beside her in silence as he escorted her to her chambers.

"What made you change your mind?"

"Pardon me?"

"You didn't want me or this wedding before, so what changed your mind?" he was at a loss of words, not knowing how to answer that- he couldn't bring you up, but Iyllir was indeed clever so she must know already.

"I came to a few realizations lately, but I assure you that I want this marriage." She nodded to him with a smile and he decided to sway the conversation away from you, the redhead beat him to it.

"Thank you for standing up for me earlier." She took his hand in hers as they neared her room.

"Of course, I understand parents can be tough." She let out a huff at that. "I admire that you spoke up."

"My parents sure can be hard to deal with. They like to decide everything for me but one good thing they did was lead me to you." She giggled up at him and he couldn't help but think that she deserved someone who will actually love her, and he hoped for both of their sake that he will learn to do that with time, and time can heal almost everything right?

"Yes, now I will let you go rest."

"I hope I'll see you later."

•

The sting of the needle only grew when you resisted it, your body was shaking still trying to relax from the shock you were put through yet again.

Your eyes were hazy but you were more stubborn than to submit to pain.

"They will come for me, you know." You heard your own voice stumble out the words.

"You think the Avengers will come save you?" Doctor Zazu chuckled and your vision came back to reality. "How long will it take them though? By the time they manage to find you, you will have already become my new soldier."

You focused your stare at him, but before you could do anything he pushed a button that sent searing pain into your mind.

"Blue." You heard him say and it wasn't hard for you to guess what he meant.

•

"Tony, have you seen Y/N?" Tony raised his mask and looked over at Steve.

"I haven't seen her in a few days but it's alright we don't have missions now." He was about to return to fixing his suit. "Plus, she is probably shaking up with that new boyfriend of hers."

"Tony…" Steve groaned at it.

"She's an adult Steve, get used to it. She can fondue whoever she likes." He snickered at the supersoldier who only looked at him in a not amused look.

"It's been a couple of days Tony, I'm getting worried. She would tell me if she was going away- she never went away like this before."

Tony sighed at Steve's stressed face.

"Hey F.R.I.D.A.Y, do you know where Y/N is?" he called to the AI.

"I'm afraid I don't know, the last she has been in the building was a few days ago, she was in the garage and she took one of your cars alongside some of your wine bottles, sir."

"She did what now? I told her several times to not touch my cars." Tony got up from where he was sitting. "Okay, can you call her?"

A moment has passed before they got a reply.

"She is not answering, and it seems like she took out the tracker from her phone since I can't track her."

"You see Tony I have every reason to be worried!" Steve grew angry at the new information, he paced the lab. "F.R.I.D.A.Y where is Mike? The guy that Y/N was with"

"He has not showed up to work in a few days, on the same day Y/N drove away."

Silence took over the room. Tony looked at his friend's crestfallen face.

"I might know where she went to."

"What, where?"

"She has an apartment up in Brooklyn, I saved it for her."

"Why didn't I know about it?" Steve walked up to the billionaire who held his hands up in defense.

"She didn't want to tell anyone, she wanted it to be only hers. I only know it because she needed to buy it, so I bought the entire building."

"We are going now. Get Nat in one of your cars and I will go on my motorcycle." It was a command more than a request.

It didn't take them long to get to the building, Steve did not care about any traffic lights and Tony couldn't blame him. Natasha insisted that she drives faster than Tony and to her credit they arrived at the place at the same time Steve did.

It was eerily quiet and Tony used the scan on the door to open it. They reached inside and Natasha already had the clutch of her gun open,

"Y/N!" Cap called at the small apartment but no answer came. Tony spotted the two glasses in the living room, one full on the table and the other half empty on the floor next to the big red stain it left on the carpet.

"Cap," Tony put his hand on his shoulder and Steve turned and saw Natasha raising the fallen glass to her face and smelling the content of it.

"This is not good, boys."

•

"Blue." The words were distant.

"Five." You were fighting to stay awake.

"Airplane." No. You screamed, trying to get out of your head.

"No, I will not turn into one of your soldiers! I won't!" your eyes flashed to a group of guards and with your anger it took no time for them to fall screaming on the ground, they could barely move when you felt the pain in your head again and you were shot back inside your mind.

"Blue."

You didn't know how much time you've been in this chair, reality and fiction blurred as you eased in and out of your mind.

"I won't turn into your soldier." You repeated again and again every time the doctor played with you and let you be awake. You knew at this point it'll take a lot from you to use your abilities.

"Even if your little Avenger friends get here, you won't be theirs either."

"What?" you hated showing weakness but your inhibitions were low.

"Either you will become my soldier, or you won't be here at all." He laughed right at you and then looked at the scientists beside you. "Put her under again, restart her."

"No, please no." They pushed you back against the chair; put the mouth guard between your teeth, and you felt yourself sink into the numbness of the pain.

You were shivering next time you woke up, you still heard those familiar words.

The machine they put you in was now rusted, at the moment you had clear mind you picked up the discarded needle on the side of where you lay. You were weak but you won't go down without a fight.

You lay there silently until the next agent came next you. Attacking them, you took the needle and stabbed them right in the throat, red blood started pouring but before you could pull out the agent's gun another agent came and their knife made a really deep cut. You looked up at chocolate brown eyes that now only held darkness when you fell to the floor and other agents lifted you up and restrained you.

"Look what you've done! What happened baby? You never put up such a fight from what I remember." Mike mocked you, you really thought he could be trusted. You were certainly wrong when he pressed on your fresh bloody wound. "At least, not in bed."

"Don't worry, she can fight all she wants, the wounds that we will leave on her pretty little brain will last and they'll last no matter what you'll try to do." You recognized the voice of their commander.

"So, did your parents name you after the parrot from Aladdin or the traitor from Othello?" you snickered at him "Then again I don't think you're smart enough to read such a high level literature, all due respect Commander Iago. And don't even get me started on the good doctor over there."

"Oh don't think you have the upper hand here, see we know something you don't. Did you ever bother checking where your powers came from? I'm sure the great Tony Stark tried, but while he failed we didn't. So we are already smarter than your avenger friends!"

You were taken aback by that, whatever created those powers within you always remained as a mystery in your head. But if they knew that, then they know a way inside of your brain and powers that you don't want to imagine.

"Well then, if you are so sure that I will never get out of here- why not share the knowledge with me?"

"We never said that you'll never get out of here, trust me," he stroked your jaw and his hand went down to your throat. Disgust blossomed in your stomach. "We have quite a plan for you if you'll get rescued, I'm sure your friends will appreciate the surprise."

Your heart hammered in your chest, mind racing with possibilities.

"Give her a dose then send her to her new special room." He stepped away and then a needle was inserted in you again, pumping blue strange liquid into you, your mind was hazy with its heaviness, and you barely remembered being put inside a sealed room. You saw a blue glow from outside of the transparent room, barely seeing the long stick and cords that ran from it. Then a blinding light flashed in the room and you felt yourself sinking, sinking inside your own mind.

The light was bright as it shone from your window. Curiousity got the better of you and you almost got blinded by the light outside until it stopped and you could see clearly again. There in through the light Loki stood in some quiet unusual clothing but that all changed with a glowing green glimmer of light and he was in regular clothes looking like the Loki you knew.

You stood there by the window with wide eyes but you couldn't seem to move as you were frozen in place trying to understand the lucid dream that occurred right before your eyes in your empty street.

A knock on the door caused you to shriek and you stumbled down to the ground, looking at the door.

"Y/N dear, are you okay? I can hear you inside." Loki's voice called out to you when you have yet to open the door.

Gathering up the courage you walked to the door and slowly opened it, willing yourself to look normal.

"Hello Loki, hello." You mentally cringed at your awkwardness.

"Are you okay? I heard something falling." He walked into your apartment casually while you were trying to gather up your thoughts.

"Yes, I'm- I'm okay. How are you?" you closed the door and locked it, facing away from him.

"I'm alright, thank you for asking." Loki looked at your form still standing by the door. "Why are you acting strange?"

"I am always strange, you should know that," you turned to him and briefly met his eyes before you made a move to go to the kitchen. "Do you want water? I'll bring us some water."

Loki caught your wrist and turned you to him.

"Are you mad at me for something? Come on, out with it. You know I always find out what you're hiding." He laughed that beautiful laugh of his and looked at you again when you were quiet. "Come on, you can tell me anything, you know that."

He let go of your hand when you still didn't answer and looked at the ground. Deciding to let it go he walked towards your kitchen.

"I'll get you a cup of water then-"

"Why are you glowing?" you winced when your voice was too loud for your liking.

"What?" you turned to him.

"You can glow, like a lamp or something. You glow-" you didn't know how to explain what you saw. "I saw you glow outside!"

"Oh." You almost felt bad at your accusation when you saw his face fall. "Well I guess there's no point in hiding it anymore- I am not who or what you think I am. I'm sorry I lied to you, do you want me to leave?"

"No! I don't want you to leave Loki, of course I don't want you to leave." He looked at you strangely and you looked at him back, a silent chuckle leaving your lips at his absurd question. "No don't leave, can you just tell me what's going on? Please."

Loki studied you then as he saw all the nerves leave you, or at the very least the fear that he dreaded seeing in your eyes.

"Very well," you've never seen Loki this nervous before. "You might want to sit down for this."

You sat down on one side on the couch and pouted when Loki chose to sit on the far side of the couch, away from you.

The talk was long to say the least, and you couldn't tell who it was harder to.

"I can make you forget all about this if that'll make it easier for you." Loki told you after you took in the information he gave you. A god was sitting on your couch. Your best friend was a god. But he was still your best friend.

"No! I don't want that!" You shook your head at him. "Can you maybe show me?"

"Show you what?"

"Your magic, I want to see it."

"You want to see my magic?" Loki was taking aback by the request, he expected for you to be scared of him or hate him. He knew you were special to him, but he didn't think you will find interest in his magic over everything else.

"Yes!" The smile on his face sent shivers down your spine, you recognized that smile.

The next second Loki disappeared from his place on the couch and you stared at the place in shock. Cautiously you scooched forward until you were sitting right next to his former place on the sofa. You reached a hand forward, searching for him in the air but when your hand went through nothing you looked at it and tilted your head.

That's when you felt the breath in your ear. "I'm not there, love." His voice was right beside you and you turned too fast and fell off of the couch.

You saw Loki there sitting right behind where you were a second ago. Gaping at him, you huffed when he laughed at you.

"You can't just scare me like that!"

"You wanted to see my magic and I showed it to you. It's your fault that you couldn't handle it well." Getting up you took a pillow in your hand. "I am the god of mischief as I just told you. So come on what did you expect?"

"I don't care if you're the god of my ass, you are a little shit." You hit him with the pillow over and over again. "Don't you ever scare me like that again!"

"Okay okay I yield!" his laughter calmed down as yours started and he knew he was done for. Out of all of the scenarios he played in his head about this moment, he never would have expected this. "What are you laughing at?"

"I just punched a god with a pillow."

•

"Why haven't you killed her yet?"

"Well, it takes time to extract what we want from her. Don't you want to see her before it?" the commander stuttered a bit when he saw who stood in front of him, coming unannounced. The moment they heard the loud familiar noise from outside, they started to hide everything they were working on so that they won't be interrupted and killed.

The two of them walked towards where you still lay in the almost empty room. At the commander's order you were taken out of it and strapped to the chair again.

You slowly opened your eyes a small gasp leaving your throat at the cold shivers that you felt as you got back into reality. You couldn't tell how long it was.

You felt yourself being watched, warning alarms ran through your head and suddenly the shivers weren't from the cold. You forced your eyes to focus back and when you did you finally saw them clearly.

"So there she is, finally with us sweetheart?" Commander Iago's voice ringed in your ears.

"Is this the little girl that is causing so much trouble? She looks so delicate, so breakable."

The second was a voice you did not recognize, it was almost melodic.

"I'm afraid her powers are the danger here, nothing more. We are taking the powers away from her like we agreed."

The new information registered in your brain, you didn't call him out on his lie- not yet at least, not when you actually have an advantage.

"You told me," you could see his eyes widen. "That you know about my powers, so at least be decent and tell me about them before you drain them out of me."

"Go ahead, tell her." The Hydra commander swallowed loudly before he let out a laugh.

"Well, did it ever occur to you that maybe your encounter with a deity left some marks on you?"

"What are you saying?"

"Dear Loki must have put some ancient spell on you not knowing it would cause what it did."

Oh. Then you cast your eyes down and let it register in your brain. All the incidents, the weapons…

"And how would you know about Loki? Who are you?" you looked into those dark grey eyes.

"I guess you're not used to this kind of grace to recognize royalty. I'm Princess Iyllir, wife of your dear little Loki."

"Oh you're no princess." You won't let her see what you were feeling, the effects of her words.

"I will be soon, he was so eager to marry me. I must say I understand why you liked him," she leaned down to you a bit. "He certainly comes with perks with that silver tongue of his."

You knew he was never yours, but hearing her say that only put salt on your open wound.

"He is probably waiting in bed for me, so I should go. But I hope you'll have fun here, it's not like you will be staying with us for long." She then looked back at the agent. "Good job with her, I want you to finish this as soon as possible.

"Yes of course." You saw him pull the remote in his hand and your heart started to race when they put a mouth guard, tears gathered in your eyes as he pressed it and the pain began again.

•

"How did you not know that Mike is Hydra?" Steve yelled at Tony.

"We must have missed him somehow but we don't have time to blame me for that! The question we need to ask is how do we not know of other Hydra bases?" Bruce took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes.

"Wasn't he working in analysis?"

"F.R.I.D.A.Y, scan everything Mike worked on ever since he and Y/N got together."

"It's his fault."

"Yeah we know- he kidnapped her."

"It's Loki's fault. Everything went wrong after he got here." Steve kicked over a chair and paced the room.

"Steve let's not focus on the blame right now, we need to focus on finding Y/N." Bucky put a hand on his friend's shoulder until he looked up at him and he shot him a reassuring smile. "We all care about her, it's not just you."

"I know Buck, sorry."

"Why would Hydra target her?" Natasha thought out loud.

"It must connect to everything that is going on with their Asgardian technology." Clint sat down next to Tony.

"What about the Asgardian things they stole?" Thor walked into the room and everyone stared at him.

•

One month ago in Asgard…

"The view from here is beautiful, isn't it?" Grey eyes looked up at him. Iyllir and Loki sat on a bench in the balcony of his room, the skies were clear and the sun shone bright.

He spent the day with the girl. They read books together and she was good conversation, he knew that.

"It is." He looked over all that was below them, the gardens and workers and surrounding all of that were the palace walls.

"It's been lovely spending more time with you, I'm sure the wedding will go splendidly!" she gushed to him and sat ever so closer to him. "It's so soon too."

It really was soon, Loki knew that. You were still there though, all around in his mind. In a crowd he sometimes thinks he sees your face, but he didn't.

He knew he was just chasing shadows, trying to keep himself away from Iyllir but it was of no use, the wedding is soon and he needs to forget about you. He looked over to her.

"I look forward to our new start together." She smiled back at him.

He tried to think clearly, he had to get over you somehow.

The girl in front of him was as beautiful as any Asgardian princess would be- from her soft eyes to her plump lips, and to the rest of her figure. She was smart and perfectly polite like any lady should be.

In the last four months he got to know her better, he couldn't deny her kindness and if only he could forget you he knows he might be satisfied with her.

He had to forget you.

He gently grabbed her chin, moving it slightly upwards to him. He had been dragging this for months, denying it all but the wedding is already planned and he wanted this, he couldn't live in the shadows anymore.

Loki saw the look of surprise on the redhead's face but it soon turned lustful when she leaned up as he leaned down to her. He captured her lips in his and gave it his all; there was no turning back now. She tasted sweet; he brought her even closer to him, deepening the kiss, starting to feel her lust take over him as well.

•

Tags: @ayybtch @buckys-other-punk @chaoticpete @madcrazy50 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @the-departed-potato @rogerrhqpsody @onceupona-happilyeverafter-love @percabethismyotp14

#my writing #bad blood #loki x reader #loki odinson x reader #loki #loki series #loki odinson #loki laufeyson #angst #loki imagine #loki fanfiction #1989 #1989 taylor's version #loki angst #loki layfeyson x reader #taylor swift

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romaxnogersav · 4 years

Text

↠ Slide thru

Pairing: Chris Evans x Female Reader

Warnings: explicit sexual content, smut, fingering, dirty talk

Word count: 2,084

Summary: Is it too hot, or is Chris making you hot and bothered in the middle of the night?

Kinktober day: October 1 - Fingering

A/N: It’s finally October, so welcome to Kinktober! I’m so freaking excited! It’s the first time I’m participating, and I am a little anxious as well, but it’s shameless month, so it’s gonna pass. Get your holy water and a spare pair of panties ready, and buckle up, because it’s going to be a shameless, wild ride.

I’m putting together a Kinktober exclusive taglist, so send an ask if you want to be tagged! All my Kinktober fics will have a separate masterlist, that’s going to be up soon!

I’m leaving you to this little piece, and i hope you enjoy! Reblogs and comments are gold, we hoes trive on them! Let me know what you think!💫

Now, enjoyyyy!😌

You groaned in frustration. It was hot, far too hot, even with the AC on. You didn't know if it was simply the Boston weather or Chris' body heat that was making you run hot. Whatever the reason, it was hard to fall asleep. Your muscles couldn't relax, you kept turning, trying to find a comfortable position that allowed the heat to subtle.

Chris was sprawled on his stomach, hands under his pillow, hugging it to himself. He was naked, only a thin sheet covering his bubble butt. You had no idea how he was asleep right now. The man ran hot like a furnace. If you were finding it hot to fall asleep in only your panties, he had to be sweating buckets by now.

With a huff, you gave up altogether. You sat up and swung your legs off the bed, and with a silent step, you left the bedroom. Your feet patted against the hardwood, as you descended down the stairs, and towards the kitchen.

With a fast step, you moved around the island and in front of the fridge and pulled the door open. The cool air hit your naked form, your nipples hardening as a pleasant chill ran down your spine. You sighed at the sensation. Now that was better.

You eyed the ice-cream, and without a second thought, you pulled the tube out.

You sat it on the counter and rammed into a drawer until you found a spoon. You opened the tube, your mouth salivating at the sight of the creamy deliciousness inside. Spooning a generous amount, you brought the spoon to your mouth, and almost moaned at taste and coolness combined.

You felt your body relax as you ate spoon after spoon, the heat you felt almost disappearing.

Almost.

That was until a big hand wrapped itself around your middle, a warm body pressed against your back, and Chris' cock nudged your ass.

You shrieked in surprise, and then a groan of displeasure fell from your lips. The hand that wasn't holding the spoon gripped the counter as the warm feeling from earlier began to seep into you again.

"What are you doing up?" Chris' voice was gruff, hoarse with sleep. You felt yourself burn under the touch on your skin and his voice in your ear. You felt a shudder run down your spine, you pussy clenching around nothing.

You cleared your throat, trying to sound as normal as possible, although the burning, both across your body and around your private parts was betraying you. "It's too hot to fall asleep," you breathed out when you felt his lips on your neck, just behind your ear. He pulled the soft skin into his mouth, sucking on it, before he let it free, his teeth scraping against it. You trembled into his hold, his lips moving lower and lower until he was nibbling at your neck.

"It's too hot or am I making you too hot? Too bothered?" he rasped, biting at the junction where your neck and shoulder met. You moaned, no longer being able to hold your frustration in. Okay, maybe there was nothing wrong with the weather. Maybe it was all Chris. His body close to yours, naked and hard, glorious.

His hand traveled up from your stomach, glazing the underside of your breast, before taking it in hand. You arched your back, hungry for his touch, desperate.

His hips trusted forward, cock hard, rubbing deliciously against the soft material of your panties. You could feel your slick seeping into them.

He fumbled with your breast, tweaking the nipple in between his fingers, the bud hardening even more under his expert touch. You whined, trying to rub your thighs together until you felt Chris probe them apart. His knee settled in between them, and when it glazed your clit through your soaked underwear, you moaned in delight.

His free hand reached up, settling on your chin, holding your head in place. His breath was hot on the back of your neck as he ran his tongue along the shell of your ear, and whispered, "Answer me, sweetheart. Which one is it?" he rubbed his knee against your mound, his hand moving to your other breast, "I can bet it's me, isn't it? I'm the reason you are hot, burning with need. So wet, your panties are soaked through."

You nodded frantically, a needy "Yes" slipping past your lips. He chuckled, the vibrations resonating into your body. He left open-mouth kisses on your neck, down to your naked shoulder, your cheek, and the corner of your mouth.

"Tell me what you need, baby," he growled, his impatience seeping into his voice.

It was too much and too little at the same time. His knee, his hand on your breast, the one on your jaw. His lips, ghosting with a feather-like touch. You needed more, and you needed it fast.

"T-touch me," you finally found your voice, your strength, to utter those two words, hoping and praying he'd understand.

"I'm already touching you. You have to be a little bit more specific than that," you couldn't keep still any longer, you couldn't take the burning. You moved your hips, barely rocking them against his knee, trying to tell him what you wanted.

He let go of your chin, his hand sliding down over your breasts, stomach, mound until he cupped your sex. You nearly screamed, your head falling against his shoulder.

"Here? You want me to touch you here?" you nodded, not wasting any more time. If he didn't touch you properly, if he didn't stick those thick, nimble fingers into your weeping channel soon, you'd explode.

"Use. Your. Words. Tell me." his voice was getting sharper, almost commanding. A new wave of slick seeped out of you, and you knew he felt it, if his grunt, the jerking of his hips was any indication.

"I want your fingers."

"There you go. That wasn't so hard now, was it?" he finally moved his fingers over you, just a little. You mewed at the feeling, head falling against his shoulder. He rubbed tight circles on your clit through your thong. Then, he pulled the material down your legs, letting it fall to the floor.

He hoisted your left thigh on the counter. When your hot skin made contact with the cold marble, you hissed. Chris ran his fingers along your outer lips, then he dipped them just so into your slit, collecting some of your juices. He smeared them over you before he pinched your clit with his wet digits.

You couldn't take it any longer, you needed him inside you, "Chris, p-please," you weren't sure what you were begging him for. To fuck you with his fingers, or to bring you to release. One came after the other, but you didn't know which one you craved more.

"No need to beg, sweetheart. Gonna fuck my fingers into you real nice," a chocked sob fell from your lips when you felt Chris push one thick digit into your cunt. Although just one, the stretch was there, and that didn't stop your soaked core from swallowing the digit like it was meant to be there. Chris buried his finger to the knuckle before he started pumping it in and out of you.

You reached back, one hand tangling in his disheveled brown locks. You pulled at the strands, eliciting a loud groan from the man behind you.

"Fuck, love. You are so warm, so fucking wet," you could feel his dick twitch against your ass. He kissed your neck, bending his head at an angle that allowed him to reach your collarbone too. He sucked on it, a high-pitched moan left the back of your throat.

You clenched around his finger when you felt him scrape your walls with his blunt nail. It was sliding thru your pussy at a great speed. He swirled his thumb around your bundle of nerves, twerking your nipple just in time. He was stimulating your body in the best way imaginable. When your body shook in his arms every time he did it, he felt a surge of pride run down his spine.

He was making you cry out, touching you. He had that effect on you, and he'd lie if he said it didn't turn him on. He was getting impossibly hard against your backside, but he wanted you to finish. He wanted to feel you squeeze his digits, soak them in your juices, and feel how your body went pliant in his arms.

You whined low in the back of your throat when he pulled his finger out. You missed the fullness, but you weren't left unattended for long. Next thing you knew, he was pushing not one, but two of his fingers in your tight channel.

You screamed out, your walls fluttering at the thickness. He stretched you good, his fingers sliding with the help of your wetness.

"You are so tight, baby. Fuck, I can feel ya squeezing me," your eyes rolled back at the praise, your breathing elaborating as gasp after gasps fell from your parted lips. He fingered you steadily, paying attention to the noises you were making. Every short breath, desperate moan, and every shake of your body.

He scissored his fingers, massaging your walls in earnest. Your pussy was squelching with every move he made. You were so wet, your juices dripped down his fingers, and onto his palm, your thighs even. The sound of him fucking you, your moans and his ragged breaths filled the quiet night.

With a twist of his wrist, he had you close to the edge of ecstasy, as you chanted his name like a prayer. You wanted to cum, you were desperate for release, for the burning feeling to leave your body.

"Your pussy is swallowing my fingers so well, baby. I can feel your walls flutter, begging for release," on one particularly hard thrust, accompanied with another twist of his wrist, he glided his nail against your g-spot. You screamed, and he did it again, "You want to cum, sweetheart? Is that it?"

You felt like you couldn't talk, couldn't give him the verbal confirmation he needed. You were swallowed whole by the feeling of him fucking his fingers into you, touching you, and bringing you closer to the brink of an orgasm.

You found what little clarity you had, as you uttered a broken "Yes".

His lips left your neck in favor of moving to your ear, and he whispered, "Come for me, then. Milk my fingers, baby," his voice was gruff, commanding.

Your pussy clenched around him in a vice grip, the edges of your vision blurred by pure, white bliss. Your body tensed before it went limp in his arms. The way his name left your lips in a scream was almost sinful.

Shockwaves ran down your spine in the glory that was your post-orgasming bliss. Chris was murmuring things into your ear, his voice intoxicating, yet a little distant as you slowly came down from your high.

When he slipped his fingers from you, he brought them up and onto his mouth, making you gasp. Although the burn had subtle, watching him stick his fingers into his mouth, lick them clean, and groan at the taste of your release, had you squirming in his hold. His hard length at the globes of your ass had your desire run up through the roof.

"You taste like fucking heaven," you felt your face heat up at the praise, even though you knew it shouldn't. He just fucked you with his fingers in the kitchen, hunched over a tube of ice-cream that was completely melted by now.

He helped you set your foot down again before he spun you around and his lips touched yours. He kissed you, all teeth and tongue, sharing the taste of you with every movement of his tongue against yours.

When he pulled back a little, it was so he could look into your face with s smirk that said far more than words could. Still, he felt the need to elaborate on his plans for the rest of the night.

"I'm gonna fuck this pussy nice and slow until you could barely keep your eyes open, darlin'," he didn't waste time before he picked you up and took the stairs two at the time. Safe to say, by the time he was trough with you, you were almost unconscious.

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stillebesat · 4 years

Text

Lemon Drops

Sanders Sides: Patton, Remus Blurb: Patton just wanted to go somewhere where he wouldn’t be judged, wouldn’t disappoint...wouldn’t...screw up another relationship. (Takes place after SvS Redux) Fic Type: Hurt/Comfort, Frog!Patton Overall Fic Warnings: Remus being Remus, Death Talk, Mentions of Nudity, Various Innuendos, Blood mentions, Negative Self Talk, Trapped/Captivity talk, Fight talk, Panic Attack Taglist in Reblog.

There was no answer.

Patton exhaled, biting his lip as he dropped his hand, staring with only slightly blurry vision at the crown emblem on Roman’s door.

There had never been no answer before.

Out of all the others, Roman’s room had always been open to him. No matter the time of day or night. No matter the reason. Roman...Roman would always let his door swing open and Patton could come in to spend however long he needed to inside.

Now….now….he swallowed, fighting to keep his vision from blurring further. Now...it obviously wasn’t.

Maybe because of today this door would be closed to him forever.

We love you.

He hugged himself, chest aching as he turned away for the stairs, keeping his head down as he moved past both Logan and Virgil’s doors.

Both firmly locked.

Both silent.

Both...unhappy with him too.

Do you think there’s a limit... on how many times someone can say sorry?

He wished there wasn’t. He wished that it would just be one more apology and things could get back to...being...better. Back to the...okay not great...but better times when his fellow Sides actually kinda wanted to be around him.

If they had ever wanted to be around him in the first place.

Had they?

Had they ever...liked him?

His breath hitched as he entered the kitchen, his fingers digging into his arms as he came to a stop in front of the stove.

Cooking had always made him feel better.

But what was the point of cooking for one?

Patton closed his eyes, fighting to keep the tears pooling behind his lids from seeping out.

He’d been so overbearing for so long. Been so set in his ways. In trying to make sure that Thomas was a good person...that...that all those icky feelings were locked up tight and pushed away that he--that he--Patton reached out blindly as his legs buckled, grabbing onto the handle of the oven, hanging onto it like a drowning man clutching to a tree root as his knees made contact with the tiles.

Do you think there’s a limit on how many times someone can someone say sorry...before you have to admit...that they’re just bad for you?

Thomas wasn’t always a good perfect person. Despite how much Patton wanted him to be. He was...he was...Human. And humans made mistakes. His fellow Sides made mistakes. Patton...Patton himself could make mistakes.

He just wished it didn’t hurt so darn badly.

Patton dropped one hand to his shirt, clutching at the fabric over his heart as he pressed his head against the cool side of the oven door, his throat aching with suppressed sobs as the tears he’d been fighting so hard to keep at bay flowed down his cheeks.

Repressing depression can also be bad.

Well...he’d--he’d never been particularly good at facing his own icky feelings either, not when returning to his room could bring such a quick jolt of happiness that he could forget for a time...all the...all the...and not let the others see...his...this...see him---

Unhappy.

Not that anyone was likely to see him unhappy here right now.

Not when they were locked in their rooms.

Avoiding him.

Because he...it felt like he’d been wrong more often than right these days. Hurting the ones he loved.

And nothing he did seemed to fix--fix--

Patton shuddered, curling in on himself, trying to find a way to steadily breathe, to keep silent so no one would come to investigate. To--to...calm down. He didn’t--he didn’t need to become--that mutant frog again...to let his icky feelings change him like that--but it...he…

I just have a lot of feelings.

And none of them were the right ones to help the others.

They never seemed to be any--any--

A zing of electricity rushed through him and Patton let out a small cry as he felt his body abruptly shift.

NO. NO. NO.

He jerked his head up, gasping for breath as he caught sight of a bright green arm before it shifted back to his normal human appearance.

NO! Patton fought to shove all the ick--sadness he was feeling away. To keep his regular appearance. He couldn’t trigg--

But the grief was welling up. Swelling like the tidal wave he’d felt before growing into that monstrous frog into a--bad guy.

Patton shoved to his feet, heart racing his tears as he leapt for the doorway, shooting for the stairs. For his room where he could get that jolt of happiness that had to stop this--

He gasped as another electric zing zapped through him. He stumbled, falling against the door under the stairs that lead down to The Others.

“Please.” He begged, sticky green fingers slipping off the handle as he curled back into a ball on the floor. Fighting to stay small, to not grow into that...that thing as electric pulses danced along his skin.

Small.

SMALL.

He had to stay---

He cried out, closing his eyes as it felt like all the air was suddenly being squeezed out of his lungs and he felt himself shift further with a soft POP. He shook his head, missing the weight of the glasses on his nose and his cat hoodie around his shoulders as they fell with a muted thud to the carpet. NO FROG NO FROG NO FROG. He internally shouted, mashing himself into an even tighter ball, his voice choking off in a deep Croak.

NO! Patton had to--he’d break something if he--he desperately synced himself out of the living room, falling down and away before anyone could come investigate the noise.

The others couldn’t know.

He landed with a soft plop onto a semi-bouncy surface that could only be his bed.

Safe.

Patton drew in a shuddering breath, burying his head into the blanket, breathing in its fresh lemon scent, waiting for the familiar zing of happiness to hit him, to help him shift back to his normal human look.

He had to stay--stay---happy. Pre--pretend that things were---that it would all be okay.

And that meant going somewhere else where he wouldn’t be judged, wouldn’t disappoint...wouldn’t...screw up another relationship further because he couldn’t control himself and became a terrible giant monster--

“FROG!”

DANGER.

Patton’s eyes flashed open barely taking in the surroundings of the softly lit room that definitely wasn’t his bedroom as he instinctively leapt before the oily voice over his head could finish pronouncing the G, terror rushing through him and coming out of his mouth in a series of frantic ribbits as he sprang off the enormous unmade bed.

SPLAT.

“Hey!”

Patton gasped as neon red liquid flew past his face as he landed in something cold and slimy and--he didn’t want to think about just what he may be sitting in right now. No. NO. He had to get away from Remus before he...before he!

“Whoa! Wartface! Hold it!”

Patton flinched as Remus’s shadowy form towered over him and jumped--hopped? His limbs definitely were more froglike than anything human--freeing himself from the red icky liquid, to land on the cold black floor, leaving bloody red frogprints behind as he hopped yet again.

Only to have a puke yellow slime meet him in a squelchy embrace as he landed in a different container.

What was this stuff?!

“Froggysoggypants stop!”

No. No way. Patton croaked as he freed himself from the second container, landing with another plop onto the blackened floor, marring its surface with red, orange, and yellow streaks as he frantically tried to run--hop away from Remus towering over him like--like--

Earlier. When Patton had towered over the others as a giant frog. But now that Remus--did that mean...had he shrunk instead?!

“GOTCHA!” Clammy hands grabbed him around the middle midleap, squeezing him tight enough that Patton was certain his eyes were bulging as he was lifted upwards.

Remus’s crooked grin filled his vision, showing him just how small he’d become.

He squeaked, an awkward sound coming from his frog mouth as he struggled helplessly in the Duke’s grip.

“Look at you!” Remus breathed, easily holding him in one hand as he used the other to pull Patton’s arm out. “You’re blue!” He exclaimed, eyes sparking as he played with Patton’spaint covered pale blue froggy toes. “I wonder--”

Patton flinched, trembling as Remus ran his tongue over his back, the hairs of his moustache brushing against his skin.

This was it. This was how he died.

“Bleh.” The Duke gagged, pulling away wiping his mouth against his shoulder. “You’re not one of mine.” He complained, running his tongue over the fabric in a manner that had Patton cringing.

How could Remus stand the texture of cloth against his tongue? Didn’t it--no wait. This was the Duke who ate pickled poo log deodorant. He probably loved the sensation.

“You taste far too sweet like--like--” He poked Patton between the eyes with a frown. “Like a saccharine sugar cookie under all that paint! Peh! At least taste bitter like arsenic or mucus! Frogs are covered in mucus! You should taste like that at least.”

Patton closed his eyes, shuddering, still feeling Remus’s tongue on his bare back. It wasn’t like he could control what he tasted like! And if he tasted like cookies then that was much better than than--

Than all the ugly and gross things that would be right up the Duke’s dark, grimey, and probably blood covered alley.

But if Remus didn’t like sweet things. And if he realized who he was holding in his hands--

His heart dropped.

It definitely wouldn’t be pretty. At all. Not when he was sure the Duke blamed Patton for being kept from Thomas’s conscious mind for so long.

He could easily take revenge.

Remus could skewer him with a sharp stick, throw him in a boiling pot of oil or even peel him open like some sort of crazy science experiment---

Patton whimpered, the sound shifting to soft frantic ribbits as he wiggled in the Duke’s grip.

“Nah! Ah! Sticky Feet! No. Stop squirming!” Remus tightened his grip on him as Patton did his best with his odd toe finger things to find purchase to pull himself free so he could hop the heck out of there and shift back to normal away from the Side that had always given him the heebie jeebies.

After all…it wasn’t like any of the others would come to his rescue.

Not when none of them...liked him currently.

Not when their resident Prince and Hero who loved to save people in distress...had locked his room and refused to come out.

Patton stopped struggling, feeling a cold heavy weight settle in his stomach as he stared hopelessly up at Remus.

Roman wouldn’t come save him. Not this time.

Perhaps it was only right that his brother, the Duke, Master of the Dark Side of Creativity, held him now. Captive. Trapped. He probably deserved it after all he put everyone through today with his…..monstrous self.

“There there.” Remus whispered, stroking Patton’s back with a finger instead of his tongue this time. He plopped down cross-legged on the paint splattered floor, head tilting at an unnatural angle as he studied him. “You’re not mine.” He repeated softly, an eerie light shining in his eyes as he played with Patton’s toes. “Too sweet. Too sweet. Not Ro’s either. The salt on him is thick these days. Sooooooooooo~” He tilted his head the other way, a small smile playing on his lips. “What brings you here to me in my dark dismal tower and not to him in his gleaming marble castle, little sugar wartface?”

Patton gulped, trembling as Remus brought him up to eye level, unable to do anything more in his grip. He’d already tried to go to Roman. B-b-but--

That door was shut to him now.

“Blue...a blue frog….” The Duke mused, humming under his breath as he rocked in place. “Call me Mr. Blue...but with the downright stodgy rainbow theme all of us have going on...being blue means you can only be--” He paused, eyes growing sharp as he grinned like a feral cat about to catch its prey.

Today really wasn’t his day.

Patton slumped, a soft ribbit escaping him as he fought back the urge to sob. He just wanted to get away where he wouldn’t hurt the others. Where he wouldn’t be judged or hated. Where he couldn’t...couldn’t mess things up for anyone any more.

But all his icky feelings had only screwed him over more. Changed him into a tiny slimy frog. Landed him in Remus’s room where he was now trapped in the Duke’s grip.

And now Remus knew exactly who he was.

“Potty.”

He flinched at the nickname, closing his eyes as his heart sunk even lower. Sure, he felt like a pile of crap right now. A tiny smelly useless pile of nothing. But he didn’t...didn’t want to be compared to a...toilet.

“This is no place for you and your awfully tender heart.” Remus said, booping him on the nose. “Why did you come to me? Like this?”

Patton cautiously opened his eyes, confused. Why was the Duke not boiling him alive right now? Hating him too? Why was he--he---being gentle?!

‘I don’t know.’ He whispered, his words changing to a soft croak as he spoke, rendering his words incomprehensible.

Out of all the Sides...Remus would have never have crossed his mind as someone to come to for any reason. In a--in a perfect world he would never have to deal with the Duke at all.

“Ooooohh~ Lemme guess.” Remus flopped backwards, head landing in a pan filled with pink paint, sending neon droplets flying across the room as he held Patton high over his head. “You waiting for a kiss?” He asked, puckering his lips, drawing him close.

True love’s kiss can break any curse.

Even if this had been a curse and not his own fault that he was now a useless tiny slimy frog, Patton knew that no-no one woul--would….no one--not even Remus--He recoiled as the moustache filled his vision, breath hitching as the gaping hole in his chest where his heart should be only seemed to grow wider.

A kiss wouldn’t work. Not--not when...no one loved him.

How many times? How many times can you say sorry?

Not enough. Never enough. He couldn’t--

A fresh lemon breeze washed over him as Remus paused a hair's breadth away from pressing his lips against his face. He tilted his head, going cross-eyed as he hummed staring down at Patton.

He snorted. “No kisses? Figures. You don’t want to see us as lovers?” Remus wiggled his eyebrows, smirking as he rolled to his stomach, the room spinning like a kaleidoscope around them.

L-lovers?! Patton squeaked, feeling his body go all warm. If he’d been his normal human self, he was sure his face would have gone bright red at that.

Remus cackled, dark eyes glittering. “Surely as Thomas’s Heart, wittle Pittle has a teeny weenie spot of love for smelly old me if he loves all of Thomas.”

And Patton thought his heart couldn’t break further. If he was any good at his job...then that should have been True.

But it wasn’t.

The knowledge that he didn’t want to have any love for the Duke only made him feel worse.

What good was he as Thomas’s Heart if he couldn’t love every Side of him?

Remus huffed, eyes growing sharp. “Oooh~” He sing-songed jabbing a finger into Patton’s chest. “Did Sappy Pappy forget he’s the center of all of Thomas’s feelings?”

Patton kicked back smearing paint across the Duke’s arm as he wiggled in his grip. No!...Yes…maybe? He...he was...the center...but….Patton pushed pointlessly against Remus’s fingers, his throat contracting with suppressed croaks.

What did it matter what he was to Thomas? Feelings. Morality. He wasn’t doing a very good job of being either one right now.

The Duke wiggled his eyebrows as he made a fart noise with his tongue. “Are you trying to only be happy again? Hide all your juicy twisty feelings? How booooring, Poppyseed. You gotta let it out!”

NO! He shook his head. Letting out his...twisty feelings had only resulted in BAD Things. He’d become a giant frog! That wasn’t good.

Now you’re a small frog. Is that any better?

“Guess what, Potthead.” Remus dipped one hand into a pan of green paint, flicking his fingers at Patton’s face. “Hate is a feeling.”

He flinched, raising a shaking toe finger hand thingy to rub the paint off his face, giving a loud ribbit of disagreement. Hate was such a...a strong word.

Remus rolled his eyes, plopping Patton down in a pan of orange paint, speaking over his croak of disgust at suddenly being surrounded by more cold slimy ickiness.

“That’s not bad, Pottycake.” The Duke said, easily catching Patton as he jumped out of the paint and plopped him into a different can of pink slime before he could blink. “You don’t have to like everything you encounter or everyone you meet.”

Of course not, but that didn’t mean he--Thomas couldn’t pretend! Patton wiped the paint from his eyes before he doggy--froggy paddled over to the edge.

Things worked a lot more smoothly when Thomas was nice and happy.

Only it hadn’t worked out doing that this time had it?

Patton pressed his lips together, chest aching as he heaved himself out of the can.

It didn’t matter. It would work out eventually. He just had to keep up the positive attitu--

Remus scooped him up, careless of how Patton struggled in his grip, getting slime and goo all over himself. “You know…” he clicked his tongue, dribbling purple paint all over Patton’s back. “I don’t need you to like me, or tell me exactly how you feel, but that feeling is a part of you.”

‘NO!’ He didn’t want it to be.

The Duke’s eyes grew sharp as he lowered his hand, chuckling as Patton sprang from his grip, narrowly avoiding landing in any other pans, his feet leaving multi-colored prints over the dark floors. “It’s a part of good old Tomalongadingdong that won’t go away, Potty, no matter how much you try and shove it into a dark dusty corner and forget about it.”

Repression can be bad.

It was--he knew that. Patton forced himself to keep hopping, crying out in frustration as he was easily grabbed around the middle and plopped back into the Duke’s lap.

Remus had proved that as Thomas’s Intrusive Thoughts despite Patton’s best efforts to keep Thomas from ever knowing that his Dark Creativity even existed. That the bad thoughts could be--be--okay. That just because they were there didn’t mean Thomas himself was...bad. But knowing was not the same as...as...accepting.

And he wasn’t about to accept being stuck here with Remus any longer than he had to. Patton scrunched up his face, concentrating on gathering his limbs together for a more coordinated hop. Even if he wanted to express his icky feelings--which he didn’t!--there was...wasn’t anyone left he could...could go to. Who would ever need you? When all you do is more harm than good?

Remus tsked, scooping Patton up and dropping him in a large can of blue paint before he could spring away.

GAH! That. WAS. IT. ‘Would you QUIT it!’ He yelled as he surfaced, splashing paint back up at Remus’s face.

It was bad enough already being stuck here without any hope of the others coming to get him without continuously getting tossed into paint along with it!

He froze as the Duke threw his head back with a loud laugh.

Oh no.

“Oooh.” Remus’s eyes glittered as he lowered his head, teeth flashing as he grinned, blue paint dripping from his moustache into his mouth. “Patteywattey has some fight to him!”

‘NO!’ Patton recoiled with a strangled croak. He’d fought far too much earlier today as that--as--tha--as the Monstrous Frog! He’d--he’d attacked Leslie, Lee and Mary-Lee. He’d even attacked Thomas without realizing--He’d--No. NO NO NO. NO FIGHTING. EVER.

He ducked down, letting the paint cover him completely, a hollow ache in his chest. He had made another stupid stupid mistake splashing back. Fighting back. That wasn’t supposed to be him! If he wanted Remus to leave him alone he shouldn’t have encouraged him by action! It should have been through words---

What words? You’re a frog. All you can do is Croak.

It wasn’t like words had helped earlier either. Not when he didn’t...when he hadn’t known the right things to say.

Patton felt rather than heard the splash of something else entering the paint can with him before reaching fingers grabbed him, pulling him free of the paint, if not of Remus’s grip.

“Hiding from a fight isn’t very fun.” The Duke said as warm liquid splashed over Patton’s body, washing away the heavy weight of the paint covering him. “But then again.” His blue moustache came into view, tongue stuck out between his teeth as he carefully wiped around Patton’s eyes with a green stained towel. “You fighting against me would be really weird, Pops, despite how often you’ve threatened violence against our dear old Virgin.” He smirked.

I will physically fight you.

Patton shuddered, gripping onto Remus’s fingers as another wave of icky feelings rushed through him, choking him to the point he could barely breathe.

Again and again. He was reminded that he could do nothing right no matter how hard he tried.

Virgil.

Logan.

Roman.

Despite his efforts...he’d let them all down one after the other.

Just like the deadbeat fathers in all those tv shows.

He was a failure through and throu--

“The thing is….” Patton looked up as Remus ran the towel down his back before setting him on the half-made bed.

“It’s just goo and paint, Pattycake.” Remus gestured around his room to the various multi-colored splotches before resting his arms on the bed. “Using it to create--” He placed a sheet of paper on the bed along with a tube of paint, squirting a glob of red into the center of the page. “It’s just a way to express your feelings. All your feelings” He said dipping a finger into the paint, trailing it over the black sheet creating a--.

Patton winced, looking away from the crude image.

“There’s nothing bad about getting those feelings out. It’s what Creativity is for.” He wiggled his shoulders suggestively as he flicked his fingers at Patton splattering him with red droplets. “Didn’t you once say that you liked playing with the stuff?”

My channel would have videos of me playing with goo and mixing paint.

Patton frowned down at his hands, squeezing his toe finger things into fists before relaxing them on the page. It felt like a lifetime ago though. Back when he’d been trying to include Anxiety in their group. Back before everything---He hadn’t even thought about sticking his fingers into a tub of goo in ages. Not when he’d been trying so hard to keep Thomas happy.

And failing.

“Now’s your chance, Patcasso.” With a wave of his hand the image on the paper vanished, leaving the single glob of red paint once more untouched. Remus winked as he scooped up Patton, depositing him on the large sheet right next to the glob of paint. “Stop repressing. Paint.”

Repressing Depression can also be bad.

But...But….painting? How could that hel--

Remus hummed, dipping his finger into the paint, idly drawing a heart right next to him. “The Heart becomes a Frog.” He murmured. “Just like one of those prudishly dull fairytale quests my dear old brother enjoys huh? With the kissing and the happily ever afters.”

Had enjoyed...it wasn’t like Roman would want to---Patton drew in a shuddering breath before shakily dipping his hand into the paint, drawing a jagged line down the middle of the heart.

No one loved him.

The Duke’s eyebrows rose, eyes gleaming as he leaned forward. “A broken heart? Oooo~I do love an unhappy story.” With a wave of his hand, the rest of the rainbow appeared as globs of paint on the page. “Go on.” He encouraged, resting his arms on the bed. “What fly got into your soup?”

Go on? But he had no idea where to start. It was just--too much. He’d been wrong--so strict and set in his ways for so long, he didn’t even know where the problems had begun between him and the others! Today was just the latest addition to a very very long list of--and--he shoved both hands into the red paint, smearing it across the heart with a muted croak. Red for his failure with Roman.

We love you.

….Right.

The hurt. He’d tried so hard to--but--red streaked fingers dug into the yellow paint, as he drew a lopsided crown on top of the heart, the yellow marred by lines of red. Roman refused to answer the door. To let him do what he did best. Comfort others.

Hence why everyone has shut their doors to you huh. You’re sooo good at comforting.

Another lie. Another falsehood. What good was Morality? What good were Feelings if he couldn’t--

He shoved his hands into the dark blue paint, drawing another wobbly heart with a line through it followed by a large smear and then a ragged tie. Logan.

Another broken heart. This one purple. Followed by the cloud and a lightning bolt. Virgil.

All streaked through with yellow. With Janus. With Deceit.

How many times can you say sorry?

Not enough. Never enough. He--he--Patton slammed his fists into the paint sending it flying all over the bed, chest aching as he closed his eyes.

“....Patton?”

He shook his head, ignoring Remus. It didn’t help. Painting didn’t help. The icky feelings were still there. If he was feeling icky how could he ever hope to--

Patton gasped, jerking as splotchy green arms suddenly wrapped around him in a warm hug, squeezing him far more tightly than he was comfortable with.

He looked up, meeting the dark eyes of another frog, one with blue tipped black spikes sticking out from his upper lip.

Remus? Why had he--why was he hold--why was he a FROG?!

The frog gave a watery croak, holding Patton close in an embrace that was so warm it sent a wave of soothing heat through him.

Oh Crofters...He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been hugged.

It felt--it felt---He melted into the other’s arms, burying his head against the Duke’s chest as the dam he’d tried so hard to build to hold back his tears crumbled like so much dust, leaving him sobbing in a series of squeaky croaks against the Dark Side.

Remus made a buzzing noise, nearly like a hum as he rocked Patton back and forth, keeping up the steady too tight pressure around him.

It shouldn’t make him cry harder. Yet Patton found himself doing just that, hot tears trailing down his cheeks. It had been so long. So long since anyone had done this with him. He’d never expected Remus of all Sides to instigate a hug with him, not when he’d spent so many years trying to keep the Duke from influencing Thomas’s everyday life. By all rights, Remus should hate him for being so strict. Should want nothing to do with him.

And here he was.

Hugging Patton.

Comforting him.

Trying to help in his own odd Remusey way.

It left him feeling all tingly inside, like butterflies dancing inside an inflating balloon as electric pulses danced across his skin.

Fresh tears leaked through his closed eyelids. It should end soon. All hugs had to end. Remus had to pull away at some point to leave Patton feeling all cold and icky again.

And yet…

Remus didn’t move.

The Dark Side wasn’t known for his long attention span, always fidgeting or spouting out a new topic of conversation.

But here he was...holding tight unto Patton without showing any signs of releasing his grip, his warmth as constant and steady as the Duke’s heartbeat.

Patton drew in a shuddering breath, eyelids fluttering. He didn’t deserve this. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, voice hoarse, barely registering that actual words left his mouth instead of croaks.

Remus huffed, adjusting his grip for the first time to run his fingers through Patton’s hair, sending a shiver down his spine. “Apology accepted, Padre.”

Accepted? Just like that? No questions? Patton trembled, breath hitching, not quite believing he’d heard correctly. “Y-you--why?”

“Mmm?”

Patton steeled himself before looking up, registering Remus’s very human face inches from his own. His regular sized face. Not a giant one. Which meant...he’d somehow shifted back to his normal self while bawling his eyes out. “Y-you di-didn’t ask why I-I-I was sor-sorry.”

Remus made a clicking sound with his tongue, as he trailed his fingers down the back of Patton’s neck, eyes glittering. “Do you know why you were saying sorry?”

Patton blinked, mouth half open with no idea what to say, his mind racing as he raised a shaking hand to scrub at his wet cheeks. There was...it was hard to explain! “I…”

Remus chuckled. “Then it’s sewage under the bridge, Patters. I don’t need to know why. You just needed to know I accept. Right? Make you feel better?”

He...he did feel a little better. “I--but--that--” Patton growled, shaking his head. “Tha-that’s not how apologies work!”

“Says who? Cus they’re wrong.” Remus winked. “Besides I got to see your rosy cheeks and it was well worth the wait.” He met Patton’s eyes before deliberately looking down.

Patton looked down as well and squeaked, practically throwing himself off of the Duke’s lap, knocking the paint covered paper to the ground in his desperation to grab a blanket to wrap around his waist, ears burning as Remus collapsed in a fit of giggles, his own--his own...rosy cheeks just as exposed as Patton’s had been. “WHY ARE WE NAKED?!” He demanded, voice cracking.

Sure he’d felt his glasses and hoodie fall from him when he’d changed into the tiny frog, but he hadn’t realized the rest of his--He shuddered again feeling Remus’s tongue against his bare back. No wonder it had been so--but he was human again! He should be wearing clothes! He’d had his outfit unmarred after he’d changed back from being that monster frog!

Remus rolled to his side and Patton flushed harder, looking away, pulling the blanket up to his neck, getting a wift of lemons as he did so.

“Never changed into an animal before have you?” He remarked, a wicked grin crossing his face. “Clothes can’t shift with you when you do that. You just leave them behind.” He pointed to his own pile of clothes on the paint covered floor.

Patton gulped, twisting the blanket in his hands. “But Deceit!”

“Shifts between people.” Remus waved a hand dismissively. “That’s different. People wear clothes. You’ve never seen him change into a snake in front of you have you?” No….but! ”But that-- my clothes! Earlier! I kept--”

Remus raised an eyebrow as he rolled off the bed, heading leisurely to his closet. “Were you a real frog earlier?”

Patton paused, mouth half opened. He--he--well they had been in a video game formant at the time he’d--he’d changed. Did...did that not count?

“Thought not.” Remus reemerged, thankfully wearing a tank top and very very short shorts as he tossed a wad of fabric at Patton’s head, the clothes vanishing just before hitting him only to reappear on his body.

If he hadn’t done cloth swaps before with the...with everyone else before, that would have been---Patton shoved the thought from his mind, drawing in a shaky breath, reluctantly lowering the blanket to see just exactly what Remus had dressed him in.

His fingers brushed over the black tank top with a picture of a kraken wrapped around a broken ship, to land on a pair of pajama bottoms that made it look like he had a multitude of tentacles instead of two legs.

Remus gave him a critical once over before flopping back onto the bed. “Satisfied Mr. Monk? I’m sure that outfit won’t upset your delicate tastes too much.” He winked. “Though I can always dress you in something more--” he popped his lips.

It wasn’t his favorite get up... but it was much better than--than a lot of things he could imagine Remus wearing. Imagine Remus trying to get him to wear to get a reaction from him. Patton bit his lip, looking back up. “Why are you being so….nice? To me?” He whispered.

Remus tilted his head at an unnatural angle to look at him, his eyebrows raised.

There is no rhyme or reason to what I do, I just do.

Right. Patton flushed, looking away. Remus just...did things. Not just bad things apparently. Good things too. “Sorry. I just---no one…” He cut off as his voice cracked, blinking as his eyes began to burn again. “I...I’ve made a lot of mistakes. Recently. I--I thought you’d--”

“Kick you while you were down?”

Patton bit his lip, pulling his knees up to his chest, grateful his tentacle patterned pj bottoms were pants instead of a pair of short shorts. “...Yah.” The Dark Side of Creativity liked doing things like that...didn’t he?

Remus twisted, shimming up to flop between Patton and the wall. “It was tempting.” He admitted, tapping a random pattern on Patton’s arm as he smoothed down his moustache with his other hand, “but considering you just cried hard enough to fill like twenty toilets--” He shrugged. “There’s only so many times you can kick a dead horse before it’s no longer fun. Seemed like you needed a breather from being hit.”

Patton swallowed over the lump in his throat as he relaxed his grip on his knees, turning his head to Remus. “Yah...I-I did.”

Remus smirked. “As a frog though? You know there is this delectably bitter frog leg soup I’ve been itching to make and your legs--” He smacked his lips, eyes dancing with laughter as he stared at Patton. “Are quite shapely.”

And he thought his face couldn’t grow any hotter. At this rate he would give himself a sunburn from blushing so hard. “I--I-”

Why did Remus have to go and say THAT. Despite his legs already being covered with his pants, Patton pulled the blanket back over them, hiding them from view.

“Soo sensitive.” Remus teased, his feet prodding at Patton’s covered ones.

He was Feelings. He just--he pushed his feet against Remus’s, shoving them back. “I’m not used to--”

“Ah yes.” Remus propped himself up on one elbow, rolling his eyes as his knee knocked against Patton’s calf. “Roman’s compliments are a bit more tame aren’t they? Something more boring about how you’re super sweet and like unto fields of flowers and being like the Sun and other trite drivel?”

Patton bit his lip, a hollow pang echoing through his chest at the sound of Roman’s name. “...I don’t think he’ll be saying anything like that...to me….for a while.” Probably never again.

Remus froze for half a breath before he twisted, forcing his head between Patton’s chest and his legs so that he could use his stomach as a pillow.

Roman used to do that.

Patton swallowed over the lump in his throat, staring down at the Duke as he made himself comfortable.

He should push him away.

But at the same time...he--he missed...moments like this. Where it--it felt like someone wanted to be in his bubble. Wanted to stay near him.

“I do love an unhappy story.” Remus remarked, bracing his feet against the wall as he gave Patton a feral grin that quickly softened as he stared up into his eyes. “But,” He raised a hand to brush at Patton’s wet cheeks, fingers coming away with flecks of paint on them as he dropped his hand to his lips, tongue flicking out to lick his fingers. “...I don’t think you should tell it tonight. A scab isn’t fun to pick at if it’s still fresh you know.”

Patton bit his lip, blinking to keep his vision from blurring. “Right.” He managed to choke out.

He didn’t know when this..this would not be fresh though. Would it ever...ever scab over if Roman--if Virg--Lo...if he was constantly left alone on the Light Side--

A warm hand again pressed against his cheek. “You’re welcome to stay, you know.”

Patton drew in a shuddering breath, leaning into the Duke’s palm. “Huh?” He was...welcome? Here?

“The night. For a breather. Be away from everyone. Seems like you need it. Though--” Remus’s eyes lit up with laughter as he gestured with his other hand around the low lit room. “I do only have the one bed.”

Patton jerked, face burning as hot as the sun as he shoved Remus off him. “REMUS!” His voice shouldn’t sound that strangled. But. AH!

The Duke’s infectious laughter rang through the room as Remus rolled back to his spot between the wall and the bed, giving Patton as much space as he could on the twin sized bed.

He may be more naive than the others in some aspects, but after finding some of the stuff that the Fanders had written about them...he--he--knew what that particular phrase could imply. “You could create another.” He said, once Remus’s laughter had died down to faint giggles, hating how high his voice still was. “You’re Creativity too!”

“I could.” He easily agreed, shoulders still shaking with silent laughter. “but that’s not Fun. I wouldn’t be able to hear your breathing if you weren’t right here,” Remus dropped his voice seductively, smoothing down his moustache. “Next to me.”

If he got out of this room without getting third-degree burns from blushing Patton would be amazed. “I--I--stop it!”

Remus tilted his head at that unnatural angle, his foot darting out to tap his toes again. “Stop what? You’re the one still here, Patters. On my bed. I haven’t tied you to it with fluffy handcuffs or anything though I could give you some. In your favorite shade of blue even.” He snickered. “Ooooooh, I’m sure I could make you squea--” He cut off as Patton shoved a pillow into his face.

He! He! Patton fell on top of the pillow, muffling his voice as he--he wasn’t sure if he was screaming or not, but AGH. Remus was--was so! So!!

An arm snaked around the pillow tapping Patton’s head before trailing down his neck. “Why haven’t you left?” Remus asked, his voice barely understandable through the pillow. He wiggled, the tip of his nose peeking out. “You can any time you know. I know you don’t like me, Pats. Don’t stay on my account.” He--yah...he---he could leave. Should have left as soon as he realized he was again. Synced back to his room. To the light sides...to--to the loneliness. “If you know I--I don’t---lik--I haven’t been that--that good to you Remus. Why are you being nice to me?” Patton whispered reaching up to grab The Duke’s hand before it could trail further down his back.

“Thomas is nice.” Remus said simply, going lax under him, his fingers twisting to squeeze Patton’s. “I’m just nice...differently.”

He didn’t understand. Had never fully understood Remus nor his purpose. But this-- Patton tightened his grip. “Well it’s...I...I need nice right now. To feel--” Loved. Wanted. He trailed off, trying to keep his voice from wobbling. Was that pathetic of him? Wanting to stay when Remus was talking to him when no one else would? When he was instigating touch without Patton having to ask? “And..and you’re...you’re being nice...you hugged me and I just--” He cut off with a squeak as the pillow suddenly vanished, sending him right into Remus’s chest, the Duke’s arms wrapping around him in that too tight grip, fingers trailing through his hair.

“Let me hold you then.” Remus whispered. “If that’s what you need.”

It was. He--he needed--Patton trembled, fingers gripping the Duke’s shirt as he pressed his face into his chest, breathing in the scent of lemons. “I’m sorry...it’s---”

Remus huffed a laugh into his ear, squeezing him tighter. “Apology accepted.”

#Lemon Drops #stillebesat #Sanders Sides #Patton #Remus #Morality #Duke #Frog!Patton #Death Talk tw #Nudity tw #Innuendos tw #Blood tw #Negative self talk #Trapped/Captivity tw #panic attack tw #Fight talk tw #Frog!Remus

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all1e23 · 4 years

Text

Between the Stars [Pt.8]

Pairings: Past!Steve x Reader, Bucky x Reader

Series warnings: CHARACTER DEATH. Grief. Overall sadness. Depression. It’s pretty angsty if I’m being honest. Things mellow out as the series goes on. TW: Military/Spouse death.

A/N: **TW: A certain death is finally explained in this chapter. It is the second half of the chapter. It’s not in crazy detail but there is some important plot stuff mixed in. I decided to post despite someone stealing my work. 😤 Thanks to my beautiful beta @moonbeambucky for looking this chapter over for me. Enjoy the sad I guess. If you like it write me a book report, sing me a song or come scream at me.

***My fics are not to be saved or posted on any other sites without my written permission. Reblogs are my jam, though! Thanks!****

Stepping away from music for those ten months turned out to be the best thing you could have done for yourself and your career. Without the small reprieve, you doubted you would have found your way back to teaching, and you loved teaching. Not that it had been intended as a break at the time you walked away. You had every intention of never looking at another sheet of music again, but then Bucky came home and things became more complicated and somehow easier. You doubted that he knew what he was doing, and why should he? It wasn’t as if he had planned on coming home to pick up all your broken pieces so he could help put you back together. He did -- whether he realized it or not -- help you get some of your old life back. The bit that you could take with you into this new one. You even called a few of your former students and asked their parents if they were interested in picking up their lessons. Most said they would love to pick up where you left off, and a few said they found someone new in your absence. You couldn’t blame them. The world had continued while you chose to stand still.

Bucky must have noticed a difference because he told you he liked how pretty you looked when you were smiling.

Lessons started with the school year, and fall was here before you could blink. You were surprised to find you weren’t dreading the holidays as much as you thought. It would be the first holiday season since you got the call and you had expected it to feel like the rest -- hollow and grim. Along with Easter and Memorial Day, you had skipped celebrating Steve’s birthday. There was a small cake you shared with Bucky, three bites in, and you couldn’t force any more falsities down. You spent the rest of the night in your room. It was one of the rare nights you hadn’t slept next to Bucky since he had been home. You needed the night to yourself, and he understood that. By morning, your wedding ring had found its way from your ring finger to a chain that Steve had given you years ago. It felt strange at first. From the moment Steve slipped it on your finger, it rarely left your skin, and when you did, it always felt like there was a piece of you missing. That feeling didn’t show up this time, but you imagined there weren’t many more pieces of you that could go missing. You didn’t want to make it a big deal, so you kept it tucked inside your shirt. Of course, Bucky noticed the absence right away. He never questioned it.

It was a step forward (or maybe backward you weren’t sure some days). They were small, slow steps taken, but at least you were moving.

You’re not sure when it happened, but one morning you woke up and everything didn’t hurt as bad, you guessed it started right around the time Bucky came home. While moving forward was necessary (as everyone continued to remind you), there were days when it felt like a betrayal. You are moving on, and Steve can’t come with you. A little guilt blackens your heart every time you smile on those days; so you falter and take those arduous steps back. It lessens with every laugh and smile Bucky draws out of you, but it’s there under it all, and there’s the fear too. You’re afraid if you move on and keep up with the rest of the world you will forget. You will forget everything you and Steve had, and it will be as if you were never anything at all. Bucky shook his head when you confessed that to him late one night with your forehead pressed firmly against his shoulder, fighting your sleep and the nightmares you were sure would follow.

“You’re holding on to the past, Y/n. You gotta let it go. I’m not sayin’ you have to stop lovin’ him, but you gotta let go of the part of Steve that’s keeping you from moving on and being happy. Or it’s going to continue to tear at you until there’s nothing left.”

“And if I forget him?”

“You won’t, Trouble. You can’t forget a love like that. Trust me, I know.”

Bucky didn’t elaborate, and you didn’t dare ask. He’s never mentioned anything about falling in love in all the years you’ve known him. You’ve never seen him hold onto a woman for longer than a month and the idea of Bucky being in love, holding on to that love all these years without ever getting to know it turns your stomach inside out and shades your heart a bitter green. You’d rather not dwell on those feelings long enough to understand them.

Neither of you spoke about it again, and you were thankful. You didn’t think you could handle discussing Bucky’s long lost love when you could barely pick out an outfit. You’ve been staring at your clothes for an hour now, and everything either looked awful or felt wrong. Maybe you needed to buy new clothes and start from scratch. Every piece you owned had a memory stitched into the fabric, and you didn’t need to be reminded of things you would never have again. Bucky pulled a grey flannel out of his closet, and you reached across the bed, yanking it right out of his hand to slip over your head. That would have to work for today. Bucky rolled his eyes and turned back to the closet to grab a blue Henley for himself.

You always did like the way he looked blue.

“I can go see Sam so you can have some time alone with Tasha and Wanda.”

You didn’t say anything. Just gave a simple nod of the head, refusing to look up from the pile of clothes on the bed that now needed to be put away. You could leave it. The girls would be here any minute, and with Bucky gone, you could deal with it then. Bucky reached out to wrap his fingers around your wrist and gave a gentle tug, forcing your gaze to follow the motion up to meet his eyes. He ran his thumb over the soft thumping in your wrist and stared at you for a while as if he was working something out.

“Or,” Bucky suggested gently. “I can stay right here and work on my bike.”

Your lips curled up in a small smile despite your brain’s wish to keep them in a permanent frown.

“Okay,” You agreed with an easy smile. You slipped your wrist out of Bucky’s loose hold and made your way towards the door, stopping before you crossed the threshold and looked back at him with a deep frown replacing the pretty smile you were wearing only a second ago.

“You don’t have to babysit me, y’ know?”

Bucky’s laughter was followed by an exasperated groan. Of course, that was why you were upset.

“Yeah, I know. You’re just fine on your own.”

There was no fighting the grin Bucky’s words caused. “Yes, I am. But… you can hang around if you want to.”

“I’ve meant to clean up my girl anyway. I’ll hang around today, Trouble.”

Bucky assurance made your heart rest a little easier and maybe his too because he looked relieved when you nodded. The doorbell broke your silence and forced you to leave his side; you barely made it to the top of the stairs when you heard Bucky mutter, “Pain in my ass.” There was a fondness in his voice that made your heart leap.

Even though you were back to teaching you made sure not to overwhelm yourself; Tuesdays and Thursdays you worked late into the evening. It was nice to have something to look forward to, and Bucky always had something to eat ready when your last student left around 8:30. That was nice too.

Natasha had called earlier in the week wanting to come over Thursday night, and you had to explain that you went back to work. There was silence on the other end of the line, and silence was never good with Natasha. She was probably mad you didn’t tell her and that you were keeping things that important hidden, but it wasn’t something you wanted to advertise. Besides, Friday was as good a day as any to have the girls over. No one had to work the next day and took some of the pressure off. Everything felt normal when Natasha and Wanda arrived; you shared a hug or two. Okay, three. Wanda liked to hug, and she showed you the muffins she baked while Natasha held up a bottle of something that looked as if it could melt the glass it came in. You didn’t know what you expected. You hadn’t thought you would feel so excited to see them. Not because you didn’t love them, but having excitement around anyone but Bucky has been rare these last few months.

Sometimes the unexpected was good.

You chose to sit on the window bench that happened to overlook the side yard where Bucky had his black and chrome bike parked and was sitting on an old milk crate hard at work. That didn’t go unnoticed by Natasha. Not that anything ever does.

“So are you two living together now?”

You slowly draw your gaze up from the wine glass in your hand to look at Natasha and Wanda, who was skillfully avoiding your eyes as she blew on her tea for far longer than necessary.

“Yes. Is that a problem? It’s not like we talked about it or anything. It just sort of happened.”

Natasha shrugged in answer to your question and waited for you to go on. She wanted more of an explanation, so you rolled your eyes and explained why Bucky was staying with you.

“He didn’t have anywhere to go when he came home.”

Natasha smirked at the suggestion that Bucky would have been homeless if he hadn’t come to live with you, and you knew right away what you said had been a mistake. “Besides his mom’s, right? She lives twenty minutes from here. What about Sam’s? Or at my place with Clint and I? And I’m a hundred percent certain Sarah Rogers would have taken him in if everyone else in his life let him down for some unknown reason.”

You turned to look back out the window right as Bucky looked up, catching his eye, and you felt the panic in your chest lessen. Bucky gave you that pretty smile and scrunched his nose at you before going back to work. You fought to keep your smile small and lost the battle before it even got started. Wanda’s voice pulled you back into the living room; it was gentle as if she was trying to offset Natasha.

“I think what Nat was trying to ask is if you are planning on staying here together, or is he going to get his own place eventually?”

“We haven’t talked about it. I suppose he will at some point, though...”

You frowned at the thought. Why did that bother you so much?

“He doesn’t have to do anything, you know?” Wanda added at the sight of your upset. “He might want to stay here.”

“Maybe, but he has to move on eventually,” you added, dread filling your voice from the mere thought of Bucky leaving you. “He can’t stay here just to keep me from falling apart for the rest of this life.”

They were right. Bucky will eventually want to get back to his life. He can’t babysit you forever. There was going to come a time when he will want to date, fall in love, and get married. Maybe even have kids. Do all the things that you were supposed to do with Steve. The thought of Bucky leaving you to have that life with someone else made you sick, and you know it’s selfish. It’s unfair to expect him to stay there with you because you don’t want to lose him to someone else.

“How are you doing?” Natasha sounded a little softer this time, sensing your unease. “Are you sleeping?”

“Yeah, I started sleeping in Bucky’s room with him. It seemed to help.”

They stayed quiet but shared a look. You weren’t fond of whatever that was.

“What?”

“It’s nothing.” Wanda rushed out far too quickly, but Natasha was quick to cut in, and by her tone, you could tell she’s been feeling this way for a while. “I’m just wondering how long you are going to keep punishing yourself?”

Natasha stared at you and Wanda swore under her breath. They talked about this before coming over. That was clear by the glare Wanda was settling Natasha with. You briefly wondered how often your friends discuss you like that. More often than you approved of, you were sure.

“I’m not punishing myself. I’m allowed to be sad. My husband died--”

“You’re right. You are allowed to be sad. Just like you’re allowed to find new things that make you happy and start putting your life back together.”

“I’m fine, Nat. I don’t need anything new. I have our house and my music--”

“And, Bucky?”

While she was right, you did have Bucky, in a sense. Bucky wasn’t new. You had a feeling what she was suggesting would be very new and not a notion you wanted to entertain.

“Natasha--”

“It’s okay to be happy again, Y/n. It’s okay to let your heart get put back together and heal. It doesn’t cheapen what you had with Steve. It doesn’t mean you didn’t love him, and it doesn’t mean you are betraying him. You aren’t doing anything wrong by letting yourself find happiness again. Even if that happiness is found with Bucky.”

You had a feeling what Natasha was hinting at, but hearing it outright like that made you a little queasy. Did people, your friends, talk about you and Bucky like this? Is that what everyone was worried about, who would get you next?

“What are you talking about?”

“Don’t act stupid Y/n. You’re a lot of things, but stupid isn’t one of them.”

“He’s been my best friend since I was thirteen. It’s not-- It’s never been--” You took a deep breath and told them both, firmly. “He’s my best friend.”

Wanda pinched Natasha’s thigh and grabbed your hands from where she sat on the floor between you and Natasha. “All Nat is trying to say is if you wanted to find happiness again... with Bucky or anyone for that matter, it’s okay. You’re not doing anything wrong by moving on.”

“It’s been nearly a year since you lost Steve. It’s time to start picking up the pieces, Y/n. With Bucky or without. You can’t stay stuck in this in-between, and you can’t go back.”

You turned your gaze back out the window to catch Bucky staring at you. He quickly looked back at his bike and fiddled with the wrench in his hand. It reminded you of all those days he would hide you in Shop class so you could skip Geometry with Mr. Coulson. The memory makes you grin. The girls might be half right. Maybe you couldn’t go back, but that didn’t mean you wanted to let it go completely.

----

Three hours after Natasha and Wanda left, you found yourself wandering around the house with what you thought was purposeless. It started in the kitchen, and you slowly made your way through your home, somehow ending up in the doorway to Bucky’s room. Your heart must have told your feet where to go and left your brain in the dark. His hair was still wet from a fairly recent shower. The ends were darker than the rest and shiny from being wet. It wasn’t long enough to tuck behind his ears, but it was long enough that he could slick it back. His beard had become relatively thick due to his laziness these last few months. To be fair, most of his attention has been on you. When he mentioned trimming it a few weeks ago, you wrinkled your nose at the thought, and at the time, he had laughed.

He never did trim it after that.

Bucky glanced up at you, hovering at the threshold to his room, and he smiled, crooking his finger for you to come in. You pushed off the doorframe and made your way over to where he was resting on the end of the bed, wet towel lying on the bed next to him. You wanted to tell him it was getting your side of the bed all wet, but you thought better of it.

It’s not your bed, after all. You have your own you should probably start to sleep in and let Bucky get back to living his own life.

“Have a good time?” Bucky asked. There was a softness in his voice he saved for you and you alone.

You shrugged.

“Tasha called me stupid on the way out. Got any idea what that is about? Should I be scared?”

You grinned and brushed a fallen strand of hair back to lay with the rest. “I don’t know, but being scared is always a safe bet when Nat is involved. How’s the bike? It looked like you got a lot done.”

“She’s good. Just cleaned her up a bit and changed the oil. You know, I like fiddling with her a bit, and she’s been sitting at my mom’s collecting dust.”

You cupped his cheek and gently rubbed his cheekbone with your thumb. He nuzzled your palm right away, eyes falling closed, and he seemed to relax a fraction. There was tension in his shoulders you hadn’t noticed before, a darkness that has never lingered in his eyes this long, and his smile never quite reached his eyes anymore. He’s spent all this time taking care of you, and you never once noticed how badly he was struggling.

He was lost just like you.

“Hey.”

Bucky looked up at the sound of your voice and quickly pulled away from your touch as if he remembered he shouldn’t be doing that. You slowly drew your hand back, letting them drop to your side and choosing to sit next to him instead.

“Wanna talk?”

“‘Bout what?”

He looked dejected, troubled. A little scared, too.

“What’s been weighing on your heart.” Bucky dropped his gaze, his tell for waiting to drop the subject, but you pushed a little more. “I didn’t see it before. I was too wrapped up in my shit, but I can see it now. The guilt and the hurt.”

If he honestly couldn’t talk, or didn’t want to, you would drop it.

“Y/n, you don’t want to hear about that.”

So it was about Steve’s death then. You had a feeling.

“If I couldn’t handle it, I wouldn’t have asked. I need to hear it, Bucky, and I think you need to talk about it as well.”

It took a long time before Bucky made any movements at all. He shifted further away from you, tossing the towel onto the desk chair and turned to face you. You mirrored his position tucking one leg under you on the bed and letting the other hang off the edge. He was still quiet, gathering his thoughts and a little courage, too. You nudged his barefoot with yours and he gave you a small smile.

“Steve was… He was walking in front of me. Like he always does-- like he did, and Sam was on our left.” Bucky licked his lips, tossing words around his head to find the right ones. This was harder than he thought it would be.

“I wasn’t paying attention. I should have been. That’s my damn job. I was too busy staring at the damn…” Bucky stopped short, and the look of guilt he gave you said he feared you already knew his crimes and found him deserving of judgment.

“At what, Bucky?”

Bucky dropped his eyes and shook his head.

“You’ll hate me.”

“Bucky… I could never hate you. Nothing you could do would make me hate you.”

Bucky closed his eyes, squeezed them shut really. He didn’t want to see your face when he said what he had to say next. “I was staring at your scarf. It was sticking out of his collar, poking up right out of the back of his BDU’s and all I could think about was you, and how I could never have-- I was distracted.”

He reached up and wiped the tears from his eyes with the palm of his hand. You had to stop yourself from reaching out and pulling him close. Bucky needed to get this off his chest and you needed to hear it.

“Next thing I knew, there was a shot fired and then about ten after that. Maybe more. I don’t know. Steve was down, and at first, I thought he dropped to take cover, but my damn ears were ringing, and shots were flying everywhere. I tried to yell out, but I couldn’t hear my voice over the noise. Sam was trying to drag me away, but I couldn’t leave him lying there…”

Bucky’s words became stuttered and choked. You could follow along, but you had to piece together the holes Bucky couldn’t fill. He explained how Steve had taken the bullet for him, how he had been distracted and didn’t see it in time. Bucky told you that he had pulled Steve undercover, and Steve had begged for Bucky to take care of you for him. Bucky left out the reason Behind Steve’s choices that day. You didn’t need to know that when Bucky asked why he did that, Steve told him with that stupid lopsided smile, “You’re my best friend, Buck and Y/n... S-she can go on without me. She can’t live without you though.”

You wiped your tears away with shaking fingers. Bucky blamed himself for Steve’s choices and you couldn’t let him go on thinking he was at fault for something he had no control over. Scarf or not.

“It’s not your fault.”

“Yn...”

“No, Bucky. It wasn’t your fault. If it had been the other way around, you would have jumped in front of him. We both know you would have.”

“But if I was--”

“It’s not. Your fault, Bucky.”

You crawled into his lap and pulled his head to your chest. Bucky tightened his arms around your waist, clutching at the thick fabric of his shirt still clinging to your skin. “I don’t blame you, and I know Steve wouldn’t,” You cooed softly in his ear. ”He would do it a hundred times over, and I know you would do the same for h-him.”

Bucky tucked his nose into your neck and took a shaky inhale. The two of you sat like that as the glow of the room slowly faded from orange to dark blue. Bucky’s quiet sobs had settled into barely-there sniffs along with your own. There was a new heaviness resting on your chest, but despite the pain that came with knowing the truth, it gave you a tiny bit of closure. He never said if he believed you or accepted your forgiveness. You prayed he did. You hoped now he would be able to forgive himself, too.

“Bucky?”

There a beat of silence. Bucky rubbed his beard against your neck making you shiver. You could feel a faint smile on your skin when he finally spoke.

“Yeah?”

Bucky slowly lifted his head, so the two of you were sitting nose to nose now, you were so close that when you whispered he could feel your breath against his lips, “I’m glad you came home… to me.”

Maybe now, you could both heal and move on to something new.

“Me too, Trouble. Me too.”

Previous // Next

#bucky barnes x reader #Bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #past!Steve Rogers x reader #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky x yn #alternate universe #military au #tw: military death #tw: loss of spouse #tw: character death

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iguessweallcrazyithinktho · 4 years

Text

On my block

Summary: requested by Anon:

Can you do a Tom Holland x reader were they live in the same block. Every morning reader runs pass Tom house and he watches her. One day the boys leave the door open and Tessa runs towards reader stopping her in her track. Tom follows and gets all shy. It could end with him asking her on a date.

Warning: Fluff

Title: on my block

Word count: 1k

Pairing: Tom Holland x reader

Masterlist • request closed momentarily

Please don't post any of my content anywhere else without my permission. Comments and reblogs welcome!

Tom was rarely a morning person. He hated waking up early; it made him tired much earlier than expected and knowing his schedule he can't go to sleep too early.

But ever since Tom got up a week ago and saw you running by his house he couldn't help but get up early. You were a beautiful woman, and looking at you made him ready for his long days ahead.

Flashback to a week ago

The sound of his alarm ringed in Tom's head, making him groan and curse himself. He didn't turn his alarm back to his time zone and now he was paying the consequences for it.

He reached out from under his blanket and found his phone shutting off the annoying sound. He was thinking about falling back asleep, but when he felt Tessa crawling up the bed and he heard her whine, he knew he had to get up for his sweet girl.

Tom kicked back the blanket, yawning loudly. Tessa crawled into the space that was once occupied by Tom's blanket and began to try and lick the sleep from her dad's face.

"Ok Tessa, I'm up darling I'm up." Tom chuckled, petting her. He sat up and slipped out of bed. The cold morning air hit his body making him shiver. He opened his bedroom door and walked out of the room.

He skipped down the stairs with Tessa at his heel. When he reached the bottom step, Tessa raced straight to the front door, ready to go potty. Tom smiled at his sweet girl and walked up to the door.

"Alright go ahead Tess." Tom opened the door and Tessa sprinted out to do her business. Tom looked around the neighborhood. There were a few clouds in the pink and white sky. A few of his older neighbors were outside working on their gardens.

Tom looked down the street when he saw a woman running. He could barely see you, but he could see how beautiful you were. You had on blue leggings and a jacket on. You had a hat on that was blocking the sun that was peeking from behind the house from your eyes.

As you approached closer to Tom's house, he felt his breath hitch in his throat. You ran right past his house, Tom felt like he could reach out and touch you, but he couldn't.

Tessa tottered her way back over to Tom, snapping him out of his daydream. "You ready to go back in Tess and have breakfast?" Tessa looked up at Tom, her little body wiggling slightly from her excitement. Tom chuckled and opened the door back up, let her back in. Before he went in himself, he turned back to the street and he could see you running in the distance. He really wanted to know you, but he found that it may be weird. If only there was another way he could talk to you.

End of flashback

From that day forward Tom has been getting up early. The boys started to notice, and they found it suspicious.

"Tom, you're up quite early. Is there someone special you're seeing?" Harrison meant his questions as a joke, but as the smile grew on Tom's face he gasped.

"Bloody hell there is someone special. Who is it?"Harrison walked up to Tom, wanting an answer."I don't know mate, I just keep seeing her running through the neighborhood and she's stunning I don't know. I probably won't meet her, but I guess it's cool to fantasize."Tom began to trail off.

Harrison beamed at the idea of his mate liking someone. "Well if you really like her go for it. I'm going to go to get something out of the car, be right back." Harrison jogged to the front door to do whatever he was going to do leaving Tom drowning in his thoughts.

Tom didn't notice that Haz left the door wide open until he heard Tessa barking loudly. Tom got up quickly seeing Tessa sprint out of the house. "Tessa!"

He chased after her, but she was quite fast. The only thing that stopped Tessa was you, who was running down the street like you always were.

You quickly grabbed her collar before she could get any further. Tom looked up at you and his whole body froze. "Uh here you are." You softly guided Tessa back over to Tom. "Uh th- thanks." Tom took Tessa from you and smiled.

You smiled back at the curly hair boy and began to turn back to start your run. "Well I'm going to get going. Beautiful dog."You smiled at Tom, and he almost forgot to breathe. His whole body was telling him to ask you out, but Tom couldn't find the words.

"Wait."

You turned around looking at Tom. "Yes." Tom frowned because those words didn't come from him, but he went along with it. "Um I was wondering because you're so beautiful, um I was wondering if we can get some coffee sometime?"

Your eyes widened and for a moment Tom thought he Crossed a line, but when your smile appeared he felt all of that fear go away.

"I would love to. I'm available today if that's fine."Tom smiled."Okay how about the coffee house on baker Street at 2 pm. How does that sound?"You smiled."Sounds nice uh…"

"Tom, my name is Tom."you smiled at him. "Alright Tom I'll be there. See you later."You waved goodbye to him and started jogging off. Tom exhaled as he nerves were getting the best of him. As you reached the end of the street Tom looked around and tried to find the source of the wait that stopped you. He looked around until he saw Harrison crouched down behind his car. Tom rolled his eyes. "Thanks Harrison."

Harrison stood up, waving it off with a smile. "It was nothing." Tom smiled at his idiot best friend. He felt Tessa nose bump into his leg and that made him look down. "Oh and thank you Tessa. You helped me a lot."He kneeled down and kissed her head."Let's go inside and go get you some treats for helping me out."Tom understood the word treat and was off to the front door giddy for what she was going to get on the other side.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭ 。.・

@london-dreamer71 @prkrholland @theamazingtomholland @jillanaholland

#Tom Holland x reader #Tom Holland x you #Tom Holland fics #Tessa #Tom Holland fanfiction #Harrison osterfield #Tom Holland #Tom Holland smut

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alexhandersen-marcoilsoe-fandom · 3 years

Text

Chapter VI: Blurry truth

This moodboard is just woww! Thank you to the moodboard-goddess @flowers-in-your-hayr.

a/n: This is the last and also the longest chapter.I want to thank everyone who read, liked and reblogged Hidden Desires. It was my first time writing and I really enjoyed it. THANK YOU so much for the great feedback, that motivates me a lot.

Pairing: ALEX x Reader x MARCO

Spotify: Kiana Ledé & Jacquees- Only Fan

Words: 5541 (omg, I hope you read it anyway haha)

Warnings: fluff, jealousy, smut & dom/sub in the middle, again fluff and a lot of sadness in the end.

Tags: @heavenly1927 @ivarhoegh

Chapter I - Chapter II - Chapter III - Chapter IV - Chapter V

Summary:

Marco disappoints you again, Alex takes advantage of the situation and you doubt if you really know them. Will you give them another chance or leave Denmark forever?

You had your last day of work before your holidays and could leave earlier. You were very happy because you knew that the boys would also have free time the next week. You were hoping for a trip through Denmark.

You nervous and opened the apartment door, excited about their reactions.

"Hej, surprise, surprise, I'm at home." You said almosr singing it. You immediately noticed the beautifully set table. The white candles and gold-colored cutlery sprayed a romantic touch. The boys are usually very simple and plain, so this creativity really impressed you.

"Elskede, how nice that you are already here." Alex came out of his room. He always kissed you so soulfully, even when the kisses were short. You hugged him and put your arms around his neck and looked into his blue eyes, which enchanted you every time. He pressed your hip against his and rocked you slightly.

"I missed you. The table is so nicely decorated...-” You started but were interrupted.

"Hey Y / N, I didn't even know you'd come so early." It was a female familiar voice. Alex rolled his eyes and was clearly annoyed. You turned your head slightly and saw her from the corner of your eye. Clara. You were seething with anger. She was like a fly that keeps coming and you can't get rid of it.

"So nice that you can celebrate with us." She offered you a champagne.

"Thank you" You accepted the glass out of politeness.

"And what do we have to celebrate?" You asked confused and had to force yourself to smile.

" Our engagement, of course." You raised your eyebrow and had absolutely no clue what she meant. But you pretended you did, because you wanted to know what she had to say.

"Oh, exactly your engagement" Alex giggled. Your fake smile went away when you looked into Marco's face. He saw your anger, but didn't comment on anything.

,, Marco said he had already told you two about that. Don't you dear?” She looked at Marco with full conviction. You would have loved to tell her the whole truth and tell her what an asshole he is, but you kept silent and kept lying.

"I must have forgotten, I'm sorry. I congratulate you on your engagement. It's a shame I didn't notice anything about your deep deep love. But…you don't always have to be able to see everything. or not Marco?” You put particular emphasis on the word anything Your gaze was full of irony and you wanted to embarrass him.

Alex patted his shoulder and grinned. "You finally made the right decision, brother. Now everyone has what is theirs." Alex seemed to be enjoying the situation. He realized that your relationship with Marco was finally over. It was never the intention that Marco would fall in love with you. You put your hand on Clara's upper arm but kept distance.

“I wish you the best. But be careful sweetie, you know how charming our boys are. That would be tragic if he suddenly has another girlfriend and you don't even notice it.” You wink.

“I'm very lucky with Alex. He never lied and was always loyal.” You cuddled up to him and stroked his chest.

"I love you so much elskede" You kissed him deliberately, slowly and long, so that Marco sees it.

"I think we should sit down and eat." Marco felt uncomfortable and wanted to change the subject of conversation.

The mood was tense throughout the evening and Alex couldn't stand Clara talking anymore. He never liked her. Her childlike behavior annoyed you too.

Alex slid backwards with the chair and patted his thigh. "Elskede come and sit on my lap, I miss you when you sit so far away." You didn't have to think about the answer. Alex put one hand on your butt cheek and the other hand slipped under your skirt and placed it on your thigh.

,,So Clara you could stay here for the next few days. Y / N and I will go to see my parents tomorrow. " Alex smiled at you and stroked your cheek.

“I want to introduce them to this wonderful woman, my woman" He kissed you and his tongue gently brushed your lip. You didn't know anything about this plan, but the idea was great. Marco looked frustrated. He knew if his parents met you, you would become part of his family. And he ... he would lose you forever.

"You didn't tell me anything about your trip" He said briskly to Alex.

"It's not that relevant. We just tell each other the important things, right brother?” Alex looked at him angrily because he didn't know about the engagement either. Also, because Marco has never mentioned her lately. He didn't even know they were still together and now they are suddenly engaged. Alex looked at you like you were a goddess.

"I hope you are happy to see them too, elskede"

"It would be an honor." The joy could be seen in your face. For the first time you had the feeling that Alex was really serious about your relationship.

"Let's go into your room, I want to prepare my things for tomorrow and choose my clothes.” You drew circles on his chest with your finger and your gaze was directed to his crotch.

“Maybe we can spend a little more intimate time together.” Your hand slowly slid down his abs and your teeth sank gently into your lip.

"Can you remember the surprise when you blindfolded me? Maybe you can show me more of it." Your hand slipped under his shirt. It was a long time since you last felt his warm skin.

“Maybe you can tell me more about Ivar. I heard he is dominant and a little rude." Your lips were like magnets that attracted each other.

"He is much more than that" He whispered into your mouth. Clara moved closer to Marco.

"That seemed to have been a great surprise.”

“Oh yes, it was. It was very intense, I liked it. But Alex was definitely the best part of the whole surprise, I assure you sweetie." You looked briefly at Marco and noticed how he actually wanted to say something, but he couldn't.

"Honey, ask Alex what surprise that was, I want one too." She looked at him hopefully.

"Oh Marco knows exactly what surprise it was. He was there. You could really do that brother. You know how it works and you can definitely do it without me." You had to pull yourself together so that you didn't start laughing. Marco noticed exactly how malicious you were but did not allow himself to be provoked. You got up and leaned against the edge of the table.

“Let's go and leave them alone" You pulled his hand to make him stand up. He stood in front of you and and spread your legs with his thighs. Your skirt slid up. He grabbed your ass cheeks. He wanted to pick you up and carry you into the room.

"I think we should eat the cake now." Called Marco to stop him.

"I have another better candy in my room." Alex didn't look away from you and bit your lip. You had to giggle.

"We don't mean to be rude. Let's share a piece, okay?" You took the plate that Marco gave you. Your finger ran over the cream and made sure that Marco is watching you. Your lips wrapped around your finger licked the cream off.

"This taste reminds me of something." You said provocatively. Alex wanted to kiss the cream that fell on your thigh away, but you lifted his chin and rejected him.

"Not here, I can do it myself, thank you elskede".

You walked to the kitchen where Marco was standing. You hiked your skirt up and stretched your leg forward so that he could see your black lace panties and slowly wiped the drop away. You let your skirt down again and went close to his face, almost like you wanted to kiss him.

"You like to watch when I touch myself or not?" You whispered and touched his earlobes with your lips. You walked back to Alex and took him by the hand without a word and pulled him into the bedroom. You thought about whether you should close the door or whether you should leave a crack open. But you wanted to enjoy the time with Alex alone, so you closed it. You pushed him and he fell on the bed. You let your clothes slowly flow over your skin onto the floor. You removed your hair clip and your hair fell over your shoulder, lightly covering your nipples. Alex propped himself up on his elbows and admired your beautiful curves.

"So dear Ivar, show me your skills". You said demanding.

"Lie down here." He patted lightly on the middle of the bed.

"Put your arms up and stretch your legs" You followed all of his orders. He pressed his knees between your thighs. He took off his shirt and undid his zipper. You splayed your hands across his abs, feeling every single muscle. He lay down on you and pinned your wrists against the mattress.

"I said you should keep your arms up". He said firmly. His hand slid down your arm across your breasts and over your navel. He bypassed your pussy and touched your inner thighs. He reached around the back of your knee and knelt up your leg. You automatically lift your other leg and hooked both around his hip. He put his hand on your neck and gently choked you. His lips touched yours, but he didn't kiss you.

"Did I tell you to lift your leg?" He whispered against your lips. You tried to shake your head, but you couldn't.

"Lie face down and keep your arms up" You obey his orders without contradiction. Your pussy started to tingle. Not knowing what he was going to do, turned you on.He took your hair aside away from your face, so he could see your expressions. His warm skin on your naked back felt like a blanket.

"Say my name, slave!" His lips brushed your ear.

"Ivar" You mumbled against the pillow.

"Ivar what?” He said in a stern voice.

"My king Ivar"

“Good girl" He liked the way you submitted.He marked a trail of kisses on your back and bit your ass cheek. The slight pain made you moan briefly. Alex took off his pants and lay naked on top of you. His tongue ran over the back of your neck while his cock slide slowly up and down between your ass cheeks. You wanted it to slide into your pussy, so you lifted your ass up. Alex pulled your hair with one hand so that your face rose from the pillow.

"Are you disobedient again?"

"Fuck me". You begged him. He got off you and you thought it was over. You really wanted to have sex after the drama with Marco. You turned around and try to convince him, but he was faster. You felt the force of his hands on your ankles. He pulled you down until you were bent over the edge of the bed. You trusted him completely, so you were only frightened for a short moment and then immediately relaxed again.

“Now I have to punish you, slave” He knelt behind you and slapped your right butt. Your adrenaline level rose. He stroked your pussy with his cock and only sank the head of his dick into you. You closed your eyes and got goose bumps when it touched your entrance. You would cum quickly if his cock touched your walls. He wanted to tease you but actually he also teased himself. Alex bit back his moans every time when he felt your wet pussy. You tilted your head to one side, but he didn't see you. His gaze was directed up to the ceiling. He closed his eyes and bite his lower lip to control himself, at the same time he pressed his fingertips against your hip. You lowered your head and felt the tension in your muscles even more, it was so strong that it almost hurt. You just wanted to feel him, now, right now. You pressed your ass against his hip and his cock disappeared into your body, Alex groaned briefly but intensely. He held your hip firmly so that you couldn't bounce.

"I know you want that too." You reached under his palms and took his hands away from your body. He hardly gave any resistance. You knew if you stayed in this position, he would keep control of your movements. You turned around and pulled him back onto the bed. He leaned against the headboard and rubbed his dick. You crawled on the bed until you sat on his lap. You moaned at the same time as his cock stretched your walls and you began to ride him slowly. You hold on to his shoulders and tried to set a rhythm. You got warm and started to sweat but you didn’t care. Your ass cheeks pounded on his thighs and your pussy pulsed. Shock waves hit your body and you cried out his name like you never did before. You tried to keep the pace to made Alex cum too. You raked with one hand through his hair and felt his hard breathing on your throat. Your legs started shivering and you were slowly getting dizzy. His hands on your waist helped you keep the speed. His tongue brushed your hard nipples and you noticed how his moan got louder.

"I'm cuming" He mumbled softly against your chest and you increased the pace. He flooded himself into you. Your knees were already grazed and hurt a little. You stopped moving. He leaned his head on your chest and gave you a little kiss. You stroked the back of his head and gave him the kiss back.

You got off him and sat on the edge of the bed.

"Where are you going? Come back here!" He patted his chest muscle.

"I'm all sweaty" You were ashamed.

"I don't mind, get here immediately and show me that you love me too." He grinned and held out his hand.You lay down again with your head on his chest as he wanted. You were tired even though it wasn't late. You could have fallen asleep easily, but there was something you had to talk about.

"Can I ask you something?” You stopped caressing him.

“Yes of course, always” He was still drawing circles with his fingers on the back of your hand.

“Did you plan the trip to your parents in advance? Or did you decide that spontaneously today?" You were very happy about the idea, but at the same time it made you feel as if Alex only wanted to take revenge on Marco. It confused you and you needed to clarify it. You didn't want to stand between them and even less be the reason for arguing.

"You know, I've thought about this several times, but I never dared to ask you, because of Marco. I didn't want to be rejected, so i didn't bring it up. I already told my parents about you when you were in Copenhagen for the first time and they keep asking for you too. Marco is my best friend, but you belong to me and I don't want to share you anymore. I want you to be happy and I want to be the one who makes you happy.” A tear ran down your cheek and you were just speechless.

Alex noticed the silence.

"Hey elskede, why are you crying?" He wiped away the tear with his thumb and kissed your forehead.

“I love you” You were touched by his honesty. Would your relationship have been different if Marco hadn't been there? How would it have been if you hadn't had sex with Marco? You remembered as Alex looked you in the eyes for the first time, you were immediately enchanted by those piercing blue eyes and after the first kiss you felt a firework of emotions. You just never admit your feelings. Maybe the situation with Marco blinded you, maybe… But now…you were quite sure…Alex is the man you love, and nobody will be able to change that.

"I love you too" You smirked, and it went quiet for a few seconds.

"Ah elskede, one more thing…” You looked up at him.

“That was a very gentle and empathic Ivar" You giggled.

********

His parents lived in a small village outside of Copenhagen. The way there wasn't too long, but you got up early because you decided to have breakfast out. You already knew Marco's trick. As soon as you are alone, he would jump at you like a hungry lion. You didn't feel like seeing him, nor did you want to hear his excuses again. Alex couldn't stand Clara anyway, so you left the apartment quickly.

You arrived at your favorite coffee house. You always got your caramel-chocolate capuccino there before your shifts.

"I think we should move in together; we should have an apartment to ourselves. We could live a little closer to the hospital. The airport would also be closer." Alex commented with his mouth full.

"You know apartments are more expensive in this area, but we could have a look at a few when we get back, if you want to" You were a little skeptical, but it would be the best you could do to strengthen your relationship.

"Elskede, I've been crawling in the mud for years now and I didn’t do it because I was bored and you have one of the best paid jobs in Denmark. You know we can afford it". He raised his eyebrow and hoped you meant that as a joke.

You were never cocky, on the contrary, you were humble before you met him and wanted to stay that way. You were proud of Alex and what he had achieved, but you never bragged. There were few people around you who knew who your boyfriend was and that was on purpose.

Alex paid the bill, just like he always did when you were out together. You got in the car and drove off. You drove through a cute village with small brown houses as he slowed down.

"Our house is up there." Your heart was pounding and your ears whizzed. He parked in front of the entrance and got out. Since you arrived, he couldn't stop grinning, his joy was huge. Alex opened the car door for you. Your legs felt like jelly and you didn't dare to get out. You were sweating even though a cool wind was blowing.

"Come on elskede, they don't bite." He held out his hand to you.

"Oh, my boy, haven't seen you in so long." His mother came out of the house, she saw you through the window. She hugged him tightly and gave him a kiss on his cheek. You didn't know how to greet her, so you remained silent and waited for her to speak to you.

“Mom, this is Y/N.” He spoke in Danish, but that didn't intimidate you. You took his hand and got out of the car. You saw in her face how she considered whether she should speak English to you.

"We usually speak English, but if you speak slowly, she understands Danish very well.” She looked relieved. She hugged you and welcomed you. Your hands were still shaking and sweaty. She accompanied you into the house and you met his dad too. A very warm man with a lot of charisma. Now you knew where Alex inherited it from. Alex took the bag from your hand and carried the suitcases inside. His sister wasn't home. You felt good and your nervousness slowly disappeared. Alex went to his room to deposit the bags and you followed him. You were still too shy to stay alone in a room with his parents. There were a few photos on his desk when he was younger. Always these beautiful blue eyes, you thought.

"How long are we going to stay here?"

"Do you want to go again? Don't you like it?" He grabbed your chin and stroked it with his thumb. He looked sad.

"No, not at all, I didn't mean that. I want to see everything. Where you went to school, where your favorite places are, just everything." You approach him without leaving a centimeter free between you, your lips almost kissed.

"I told my best friend that we would be arriving today. He has invited us to his place tonight. What do you think?" He grinned at you.

"We'll be there. I love you." You gave him a quick kiss before you heard his mom calling.

"The meal will be ready soon." Your lips almost kissed. You went the stairs down. Alex was holding your hand, but you weren't too comfortable with it, so pulled it away before they could see it.

"It smells lovely, thank you for having me" You smiled at her. You all sat at the table together and you got a little homesick. You missed your family and your friends, but the warmth of his family covered that feeling for a brief moment.

"And how do you like Vikings?" She asked and was curious about your answer.

"So ... uhm ... shall I be honest?" You looked at Alex. You were hoping for a sign from him, but he was only focused on his food.

"I only watched a few episodes.” You blushed.

“But Alex told me what the series is about." You commented and hoped that they are not disappointed. You wanted to make a good impression, but you didn't seem to succeed.

"Really? So, you don't know him because of the show?" She seemed surprised.

"No. Maybe I really have to watch the series."

"You have to know that he kisses other women on the series. So, if you get jealous you have to skip those episodes." Her honesty intimidated you. You knew from Alex that his previous girlfriend couldn't handle his fame and they often argued because of it.

"I think I should get through that; we didn't know each other at that time." You said confidently. Alex told them, how you met each other and how you emigrated to Denmark. Of course, he skipped the Marco-part.

His dad patted Alex's shoulder. "She is a tough woman. I like her." You blushed.

The conversation was cut off by Alex's phone. You were relieved because his mom's questions made you more and more nervous. They got more personal and you didn't want to say anything inappropriate.

"I said we'd be there in an hour, is that okay for you?" asked Alex, who had previously spoken to his best friend on the phone.

"Yes sure." You hadn't heard Alex speak Danish very often, only when he was alone with Marco. Hear him speak longer sounded very erotic. His voice was just perfect for this language.

"Maybe from now on we should always speak Danish, even when we get home.” You were ready to fully integrate into the culture, you wanted to feel like a Dane and act like a Dane.It would probably be weird at the beginning, but Alex seemed enthused about it and that made you feel good.

You helped clear the table and clean up the kitchen. His father stood with you at the sink. He put the clean glass in the cupboard and stepped closer to you.

"You are always welcome here, consider us as your second family. Alex is a good man, treat him well." He spoke in a low voice. It seemed important to him to tell you that in private. You looked into his eyes and realized that Alex means a lot to him. A tear gathered on the edge of your eyelid.

"Tusind tak..." Your voice was suppressed by your emotions so you couldn't pronounce it clearly.

"Elskede, are you ready, shall we go?" His father smiled at you one last time. You took a deep breath, nodded slightly and left.

"Have fun and drive carefully." His mom stroked Alex’s back and closed the door behind you.

******

Alex had such a big smile on his face when he saw him standing at the front door. He got out and they hopped towards each other. They hadn't seen each other in months. You didn't dare to join them, so you leaned against the car door and waited.

"Heeey, who is that?" He leaned back slightly. He patted Alex hard on the shoulder once, that made him take a lunge.

"That's Y / N, my girlfriend" He waves for you to go over to him.

"She's really hot, good choice"

"Nice to meet you". You shook his hand and ignored what he said.

"Dude, why don't you tell me that she understands Danish." He said grumpily to Alex."I'm sorry for my rudeness, my lady, please come in." Alex laughed. "He has always been a very honest person". Alex put his hand on your hip and let you go first.You sat on the sofa and he brought beer. You're going to drive back, so you just drank a coke. You didn't say that much during the evening because they talked about video games or about other friends you didn't know or about things from the past."Let's have a cigarette." Suggested his friend. Alex was a casual smoker, so he went with him on the balcony. You didn't like the smell, so you went to the bathroom. You didn't hurry, so you checked your cell phone and saw a message from Marco."I know you're mad, but I can explain it. Everything I've told you is true, please believe me." You deleted the message without replying and walked out of the bathroom.

You went back the corridor and noticed the beautiful pictures on the walls. The drawings were silhouettes of naked women. You stop at each picture to look closely; they were very aesthetic. The guys hadn't closed the balcony door completely so you could overhear the conversation, while admiring these pictures.

"... maybe; but believe me she's not the right one. I know you Alex. Talk to Alicia againand the problem will be resolved. Alicia loves you, she was here once and asked for you.” Your heart started pounding, and you didn't want to believe what you heard. You were frozen and couldn't move or say anything. Tears ran down your cheeks without you being able to control. You felt a pain in your chest and a pressure in your stomach. You were determined to confront Alex with it, but when you stood in the room and saw them outside, you got scared. You tried to listen carefully again.

"You once told me that your kisses on set were real. Then go and show her that." His friend continued to encourage him.

It got worse and worse with every word. You took your jacket and ran out of the house. You don't know where to go but you just wanted to get away. A bus drove to the bus stop. Maybe that was a sign.

You got in and bought a ticket back to his parents' house to pack your things. Your eyes were red from crying and your scarf was wet from the dripping tears. The knot in the throat kept pressing and you felt like you were suffocating. You rang the doorbell and hoped that they wouldn't ask any questions.

"Hej Y/N, come in, where is Alex?" His mom asked surprised and looked over your shoulder.

"He's not there. May I go into the room for a moment?" You answer briefly without looking her in the eye. She took a step to the side to let you in. You quickly tossed your clothes in your bag and walked back down the stairs.

"I thank you so much for your hospitality, I felt very comfortable. It was an honor meet you." The tears in the eyes made you see blurred. You remembered his father's words and worried about what he would think now.

"But dear, where are you going? What happened? Why are you crying?" His mom stroked your arm and was concerned about your miserable emotional condition.

"It's time to go back home…my real home." She knew immediately what you meant.

You went out and looked back one more time. Her sad face made you intensify your feelings and feel worse. A taxi picked you up and drove to Alex's apartment. Fortunately, you had the key in your handbag. You went in and tried to ignore Marco, who was having sex with Clara on the sofa. You packed the rest of your things. Marco followed you through the apartment and tried to stop you, but you didn't want to talk to anyone. You left the keys on the kitchen table and closed the door behind you.

You wanted to get to the airport quickly, so you paid the taxi driver to wait for you. On the way there, you tried to cover up your grief with make-up. Your fingers feel paralyzed, you couldn't hold the brush properly.

You were standing at the check-in when Alex tried to call you for the fourth time, you ignored every single call, but he kept trying. You passed the passport control and you knew it was over now. It was a good time in Denmark, but you couldn't take it anymore. They both lied to you, several times. You never loved anyone like you loved Alex, but you just seemed to be his time- waster to forget Alicia.

Someone knocked loud on the glass partition. Since everyone was looking there, you had to turn around too to see what was going on.

“Y / N don't go! Please come back! Y / N! I love you! Do not get on the plane!”. It was Alex. He knocked the pane so hard that it could easily break in. It was difficult for you to just walk away and ignore him. The desperation on his face could not be overlooked. You sat down in the waiting area in front of your gate and watched how he tried to gain access to you. But it didn't seem to work. He argued loudly with the security guard and saw how he often pointed to the departure screen and tried to explain something to him.

The man stayed relaxed and that seemed to work.

He went up to you. “Excuse me ma’am. There is someone who needs to talk to you urgently. He said he won't calm down until you go to him. Do you know this man?" You didn't want to attract more attention and followed the security guard.

"What are you doing? Where are you going? Why are you leaving me?" He wanted to take your hands, but you pulled them away.

"Ask Alicia". You said it callously. You wanted to start crying again but you had cried so much before that you didn't have a tear to spare.

"Forget what he said. He likes Alicia, that's true. But HE likes her, not me. Yes, we had a relationship during the shoots, but that's history. I don't have any feelings for her anymore. She wanted to be with me again, but I didn't want to. Believe me, if I had wanted that, I would have done it a long time ago. " He wanted to stroke your cheek, but you turned your head away. You didn't want to be blinded by lies again.

“Well she’s still asking for you”. You insisted.

“Yes and after that she fucked with him.”

"When I saw you in the pub for the first time, I immediately had the feeling that you were special. There was another completely empty table that night, but I wanted to sit next to you. If you get on that plane now, I'll follow you. I'll go to the counter and buy a flight ticket. And if I have to sit on the floor, I'll fly with you. I can't let you take my heart with you. I love you. Please, we can build a new life together." He held back a tear and it was the first time you saw him cry.

He took your hand and bowed his head. "Please.." He said weakly as his tear fell on your hand.

You turned away from him and took your suitcase and Alex realized how you had made up your mind. He covered his face with his hands so that no one could see his sadness.

You took Alex’s hand to look into his icy blue eyes. “Let’s go home.” You squeezed his hand and he understood that you will never let him go again.

#ivar ragnarsson #ivar the boneless #alex hogh andersen #alex&marco #alex høgh #vikings #hbovikings #marco ilsø #hvitserk ragnarsson #hvitserk #ivar #ivar imagine #fanfiction #alex høgh andersen #alex hoegh andersen

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suchalonelysunflower · 4 years

Text

If it means a lot to you (a.i)

Pairing: Ashton Irwin X Reader

Summary: Songfic based on the song “If it means a lot to you” by A Day to Remember. You haven’t heard from Ashton in weeks, could you endure all the pain while he’s on tour or it would become too much?

Warnings: ANGST, strong language, overthinking and anxiety. Also some grammatical mistakes (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word Count: 2.6 K

Author’s Note: I was feeling so angsty today and this was the product of me pouring out my feelings into a fic. Reblogs, coments and feedback are always welcome and apreciated! I would love to hear your thoughts 💙 Hope you like it and Happy reading🦋

My Materialist

It felt good to be on the stage again. It felt more than good, actually. The sound of screaming fans, calling out your names in pure ecstasy as one by one the songs pass and reverberates throughout the whole stadium, or arena or a simple, yet packed, venue. The adrenaline that cursed through the veins of each one of them as they gave their all, feeling how the base makes the entire stage shake with rhythms they know by memory and would never get tired off. It felt good to be on the stage again, to be on tour again. But not everyone gets to have everything they want.

You were sitting on your sofa, getting lost in thought as the TV played some old episodes of your favorite show as background noise of your own pity party. It’s been two months since Ashton went away on tour with his band again, and even though you knew this made him happy, you always hated when he had to leave.

The feeling of loneliness crept in two weeks and a half ago, when he started to miss your calls and texted you only once a day. You knew he was busy, you knew he must be tired, but so are you.

You understand that this is his job, you’ve been through this before, but the separation was never easy. You always worried about his safety, how he’s dealing with stuff and if he ever misses you or if he had someone else he’d rather be with while you were away and tucked under your shared sheets in LA. He always came through though, pushing those thoughts away by reassuring his love, either by facetime or a simple call. But you haven’t seen him or heard of him in so long that you couldn’t help but drown yourself in a pity parade for one. You miss him, you need him. And it’s still so long until you could see each other again.

A notification on your phone pulls you away for a while, it takes a few moments before you realize that it was in fact your phone and not a trick of your mind. You jump right to it, thinking, hoping that it would be Ashton trying to call you or even a simple text. The beating of your heart ran like a horse before you could even register that it was just a notification from instagram, you just saw his name and quickly swiped to open it.

@ ashtonirwin: Thank you for singing with us xx

The post was simple, you could see the crowd going wild as Andy took a photo of the boys in their element. Ashton was smiling behind his drum kit, taking in the scenery of a thousand screaming fans that were there just to see them, to sing with them. And it hurt you.

It hurts not being there. Not being the one that was at the other end of the smile, and oh, how you miss that smile.

You opened the camera roll, forgetting to put a like on the post as your mind decided to add some salt to the wound. You scrolled a few pictures down until you found what you were looking for: A video of Ashton.

His smile was clear even before you pressed play. You remember the day he sent that to you, it was at the beginning of the tour and you were feeling a little needy, so he decided to send you this while you were asleep. He knew it would make you feel better once you woke up. And it did.

It was a simple video of him just talking to the camera, but it always made you feel better and you hope this time it will as you pressed play.

“Hey, darling” Ashton said with a smile so wide you could see every dimple and wrinkle on his face “I hope you’re good tonight, I know you don’t feel right when I’m leaving… It’s not easy for me either, being away from you and being unable to kiss you and cuddle you like we do. I miss you, dear”

The sadness in his voice moved you and you wished you were there with him, doing your best to push that sadness away. “Tour’s going great so far, I really wish you were here to see it. But you will be, one day and it will be awesome. But I can’t come back home till they’re singing, and oh, how amazing it is to hear them sing back at us, it’s almost as beautiful as to hear you sing to me one of our songs, even if it’s to mock our oldest songs” His smile lit up the screen ashe giggled “Just wait till I get home, baby. It won’t be long now, I swear. I love you”

“I love you” You whispered to the face on the screen as the video stopped.

The tears were rolling down your face and you couldn’t do anything to stop it. The video always helped to make you feel better but, somehow, it just made missing him worse.

It wasn’t enough, you needed him. You needed him and he was MIA, the only news you get from him are from social media and you couldn’t handle it anymore.

You couldn’t help but wonder if he felt the same.

Ashton was laying in his bunk bed, smiling as he scrolled down twitter to read the reactions to tonight’s concert. It was one of their best and he was very proud of the energy they put on stage for the world to see.

He always enjoyed tour life, visiting new cities and countries every night, giving his all in all the concerts and spending time with his best friends. It was all he ever wanted since he was a kid and now he was able to experience it.

“Hey, Ash!” Luke called his attention from the bunk across the small hall “Could you tell Y/N that Sierra wants to talk? She said it was something about a recipe but it seems like she can’t get in touch with them”

Ashton frowned, you were never the one to shy away from their friends, always being the most social one of the two of them “Uh, yeah. Sure man”

“Thanks, and tell Y/N we are missing them, it’s been too long since we saw each other”

‘It has been a long time’ Ashton thought, or at least it seemed like it because he was sure he sent a text earlier today and…

Ashton’s expression froze when he saw that he didn’t text you today, or yesterday or the day before that. He didn’t even respond to your last text.

Y/N: Tell me something sweet to get me by.

How long ago was that? Why didn’t he notice before?

A feeling of guilt ran through him, feeling disgusted at himself for forgetting about you, the most important thing in his life. How could he? You must’ve been feeling low that day to text him something like that, he knew how much you hated when he had to leave. You didn’t text him after that, maybe you were okay now, but he still needed to talk to you, to apologize.

He sighed when he saw what time it was, now it wasn’t time for a facetime call, knowing that you were probably asleep by now. He would apologize to you in the morning.

Little did he know that you were still awake, sobbing and calling out his name through your cries.

You woke up when the sunlight hit your face. You furrowed your eyebrows at your surroundings, realizing that you fell asleep on the couch. Luckily it was a Saturday, so you had no other responsibilities other than crying yourself to sleep for maybe the tenth time in a row?

You knew it wasn’t fair, for you or for him, to be enduring this kind of pain. But if you meant a lot to him, why hasn’t he responded? or calling to check up on you? This place felt lonelier by the minute, his mugs were in the cupboard, some of his clothes were in the closet, his music room remains untouched and yet it seemed like he was never here at all to begin with, just a ghost of his memory floating around to remind you of what you were missing.

You felt the tears about to crash down again, but you had no energy left in your body to cry. You were exhausted, needy, lonely and down right miserable while the love of your life was living his best life without you in it.

Ashton was living his best life, but he still felt something was missing. He sat down on the couch the venue offered, it wasn’t as comfortable as he would expect but it didn’t matter. He knew he had to talk to you.

He has been a shitty boyfriend lately, he understood and hated that. You didn’t deserve to be pushed aside like he did and he felt awful. So, with his heart in his sleeve, hoping you’ll forgive him and that you were okay, he picked up the phone and called.

Ashton heard the beeping tone three times before you decided to answer “...Hey, sweety” You said with a sigh.

Ashton could tell you were sad, a punch in the guts hurt less than hearing your voice so small and defeated. “Hey, darling,” He said,making his tone a little bit more uplifting, thinking it might help “How are you? Sierra said that you weren’t answering your phone, is everything okay?”

Hearing his voice, his cheerful tone as if nothing has happened or as if this wasn’t the first time in weeks that you’ve heard of him, hurt more than you could ever expect. You felt silent tears rolling down your face as you contemplated what to say about that.

“I just-”

“Ash, we need you for soundcheck” A voice said on the other line.

Ashton raised his hand, annoyed at the interruption, asking the boys to wait a second. He needed to hear from you first. All three of the guys backed up immediately when they saw the serious expression on the drummer’s face.

“Sorry, love. I think the boys need me” He said, hoping you wouldn’t get mad.

“But, what about me?” You asked before you realized what was coming out of your mouth.

“What?” Ashton said with a concerning tone.

“I need you here, Ashton” You cried, unable to keep the tears at bay anymore “I need you here tonight, and I know that you don’t wanna be leaving and I get it, I swear I totally get it and I’m not trying to pressure you or anything, it’s okay that you want this”

Hearing you cry through the phone broke Ashton’s heart. He did this, he caused this. How could he neglect you like that?

“I want it but I don’t need it” He quickly reassured you.

“Yes, you want it. But I can’t help it, I-” Your voice shook “I just feel complete when you’re by my side. I know I can be needy sometimes and believe me, I hate that as much as you do, probably. But, Ash, I haven’t heard from you in weeks! Yes, a morning text now and then but sweety, I don’t think you understand how bad this hurts”

Ashton felt the tears burning in his eyes, your broken voice sounded like an echo in his head, making him wish he could go back and fix his mistakes, to take all your pain away.

“Do you know how hard it is to be in this house alone, not knowing if you are okay or if you miss me? I found myself walking around aimlessly, trying to hold on to the memory of you here, to even a hint that I wasn’t dreaming when I held you close because it’s been so long and I don’t think I can take it anymore. Knowing that you can’t come home till they’re singing, till everyone is singing back at you”

“B-baby-” Ashton said, not caring that he sounded desperate, because he was. He didn’t like where this conversation was going “Baby, I know I fucked up, big time. But don’t you ever doubt that you are the most important thing to me, I swear. Darling, if you-” He said, swallowing the lump in his throat “If you can wait till I get home, I swear that when tomorrow comes this will all be in our past”

You stared blankly ahead as you heard him say those things. It broke you to your core, but you knew what you had to do. It was the best for both of you.

“Ash, you know you can’t give me what I need. Not right now and I can’t ask that from you, I would never ask that from you and you know it. Even though you mean so much to me, I need you to be happy, I need to be happy and maybe we thought that we could find happiness together but Ash, this ain’t it”

“Darling, wait-”

“I love you, but I can’t wait through everything. I can’t keep crying myself to sleep every night wishing for a text, a call, a sign that you are okay. And I can’t ask you to give up your life just to be with me, we both know it’s not going to work and we’ll be miserable-”

“Is this really happening?” Ashton interrupted you.

He was pacing back and forth in the little room, tears falling freely as he understood the words you were trying to say. You were leaving him. You were leaving him and he couldn't blame you. He knew it was too much to ask but he hoped… if he had tried hard enough, if he hadn’t neglected you the way that he did and invalidating you by not acknowledging your feelings, maybe this wouldn’t be the outcome of his mistakes.

“I love you,” He pleaded.

“Ash…”

“No, Y/N!” I know, I fucked up but please! Please, darling, don't leave me” He begged “I swear I’ll never be happy again, not even if we stay friends so don’t even dare to say that. Y/N. I love you. I love you, darling. You are the love of my life and -” He choked, overwhelmed with grief of what he just lost.

“Ash, please don’t make it harder” You cried, silently as your heart broke in a thousand pieces “We knew it’d happen eventually”

“No we fucking didn’t! I didn’t! I want you in my life, Y/N. And I know I sucked at letting you see that but- I swear, if you can wait till I get home, I swear we can make this last, baby. Please”

You stayed silent, wanting to be able to believe him right now, but knowing this was for the best, even if it hurt, it’s what needed to be done so both of you could be happy. And you want nothing more than for him to be happy and free to do whatever he wants, even if it breaks your heart.

“Goodbye, Ash. I love you” You said, voice breaking at the end “I’ll always love you”

“Y/N, don’t-” He pleaded one last time before you ended the call “FUCK” He yelled, throwing the phone to god knows where.

He lost you.

Luke, Calum and Michael came running towards the room when they heard Ashton yell. However, they didn’t expect to find their friend sitting on the floor, sobbing as he started to hyperventilate.

“Mate, what happened?” Ashton took a big breath.

“I fucked up, Cal” He said with a voice as broken as his heart “I fucked up and I don’t know if I can fix it”

Part 2

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