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#but like sometimes i wonder what its like to be like. healthy lmao.

hopelesslyromanticshark · 1 month

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Dearest Covey.

Hello!! It’s me!! I’m here to make a request before it’s too late😞🙏🏻 as usual, Percy Jackson x Aphrodite!fem!reader, maybe a blurb on reader and Percy going shopping?😋 it’s okay if not possible don’t worry!! Take your time:) also tomorrow I’ll send in my usual yapping, im currently mid valorant game as I have died, but anyways as always stay safe, healthy, and hydrated!!

Love always

-🪷

✮⋆˙ c'mon, barbie, let's go shopping!; percy jackson x daughter of aphrodite! reader blurb

content: percy jackson x daughter of aphrodite! reader blurb warning: none! author's note: POOKIE I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK LITERAL DECADES LMAO THAT'S MY BAD FRFR also i had so many ideas for this but also none at the same time???? i live a very confusing life lmao- but the title was just too cute that i couldn't just let this ask slip away from me!! hope all ya percy fans enjoy frfr

"oh, cute!" you mused, gliding your fingers over the navy blue shirt. it felt soft and looked like it would give that perfect sinched look. you pulled it off the rack, taking a good look at the whole shirt. then you heard the squeak of sneakers, looking up just in time to see your darling boyfriend, bending at the hips as he desperately tried to get breath back into his lungs. partly because he saw you and partly because he ran the whole way there from the food court.

"hi...baby," percy managed to huff out after a few minutes, earning him a few giggles and a kiss pressed to the corner of his lips.

"hey! good news on the ice cream situation?" you asked, holding the shirt to your chest as you came to the conclusion you'd buy it, the thought that percy would be drooling over you in it being the deciding factor.

"no ice cream, which is a travesty. but, they got froyo!" percy explained with a shrug, easily draping his arm over your shoulder as he inspected the shirt in your arms.

"you know i love me some foryo. especially when its with yo!" you joked and it left both you and percy cringing.

"that was so bad-"

"im never saying that again," you winced, leaning into percy's hold easily as hie eyes darted down to the shirt in your hold. his lips curled upwards as his eyes returned to your own.

"you want it?" he asked and you rolled your eyes at the boy, shrugging his arm off your shoulders.

"yes. but, perce, im gonna buy it myself-"

"what? blasphemy! you're not supposed to pay for anything anymore. that's the point of having a boyfriend, duh!" percy cut in, making a dive for the shirt in your hold. you were quick to avoid his hands, taking rapid steps backwards and twisting to avoid his grabby fingers.

"back off, foul beast! i have my own money!" you hissed at the boy through your giggles, taking a small jump back as his fingers grazed the tag of the shirt.

"yes! that you, as my stunning, sweet, gorgeous girlfriend, do not have to spend! think of me as your own personal atm machine," argued percy, managing to wrap his arms around your waist and pull you slamming back into his chest. you laughed but leaned away from him the best you could, holding the shirt out as far as possible. but due to his longer arms, he easily snatched it from you and then held it straight into the air. and despite your jumping, you didn't even get close.

"percy," you whined, dragging out the last letter of his name but he just smirked and marched up to the register. and you watched him go, a small shake of your head but a smile nonetheless.

sometimes you wondered who the real child of Aphrodite in this relationship was.

#postcards from covey ౨ৎ #all my love ౨ৎ #pjo #hoo #pjo fandom #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson #percy jackson x reader #percy jackson fanfiction #percy jackson fandom #perseus jackson #perseus jackson x reader #pjo hoo toa #toa #heroes of olympus #perseus jackson fanfic

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ckret2 · 1 month

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no idea if anyhting of the sort has been asked before but i was wondering mostly based off my past experiences

would bill be the kind of guy who is just Very Aware of like . sensations in his body and have it lead to shit like having a problem with chewing off old skin and stuff. In the sense that oh crud its just a Smidgen of old skin peeling off it's going INTO the Chomper or just out of boredom because He Can Do That

maybe both

like ohh . i think i feel a corner of my lip peeling off im gnawing that off or ohhh is that a little bit of skin slash nail at the tip of my finger i see i wonder if i can bite that off . Seems Cool .

apart from that your fic is feeding me so well and it took me a week to realize "lord almighty thats the same author that wrote those really fucking funny Alastor In Situations fics". i think a small part of my brain was in denial for whatever deranged reason there was .

ALASTOR IN SITUATIONS FICS LMAO. That really is what most of my fics about him are.

I think Bill is really aware of body sensations, but the sensations he is/isn't aware of have really low correlation to what a human who's overly aware of body sensations would be aware of. Like, this is the guy who's violently nauseous trying to comb his hair but who mixes mustard with maple syrup.

You and I have an idea of what our body should look like when it's Right—when our skin is whole and healthy and smooth, when our nails are cut correctly. If a little flake of skin is peeling off, if we have a hangnail, if there's a tear or a bump or a ridge that shouldn't be there, we know that's a Little Bit Wrong, and for some people that Little Bit Wrongness gets really really irritating until they remove it.

Bill doesn't have an internal conception of a Right human body. For him there's no such thing as a Right body that's human. You can't pick/chew at individual flaws when you perceive everything as one unending flaw. A human body is all skin flakes upon skin flakes, dead cells waiting to peel and slough free, odd little bumps and ridges and pores and wrinkles and folds... He could exfoliate his entire body down to the bone and then he'd find fault with the bone's texture.

Look at this image and remove the dots that are wrong.

Do you have the slightest idea which of these dots are supposed to be "wrong"?

What criteria do you base it on? It's all just visual noise.

It's hard to even focus on any particular dots.

Even if I tell that the yellow dots are what's "wrong"...

... is it any easier to see them in the image above? Even knowing what you should be looking for, you have to hunt for them. It takes hard focus to see the yellow dots separately from their neighbors in all that noise. You'll never find all of them unless you zoom in and go pixel by pixel. They just don't stand out. And still nothing about the yellow dots really feels "wrong" to us on an instinctive, visceral level. And if you do take out all the "wrong" yellow dots—do you know which color you're supposed to fill in instead? Even knowing what's wrong isn't enough for you to figure out what's right!

That's what flaws on human skin are like to Bill. It's nonsense on a plane of more nonsense. He's still grappling with the fact that he's bones slathered in meat rather than pure energy under a foil-thin shell of electrified gold. He is NOT in an emotional place to even NOTICE a hangnail.

When his skin starts to bother him, he's less likely to pick at little bits of it and more likely to be fighting the urge to claw it clean off.

He's more often bothered by things like the sound/feeling of his own breathing and choose to stop it for a few seconds just to get some GODDAMN PEACE AND QUIET FOR ONCE before reluctantly starting to breathe again because he knows he has to, ugh. Sometimes he moves his arms and is conscious of ribs under his chest. Sometimes he turns his head instead of his whole torso and gets a queasy sensation from being reminded he has a spine rather than a hard exoskeleton. He still sticks food in his eye when he's distracted and he's uncomfortable that he can't see his food inside his mouth. THAT'S the level of "bothered by bodily sensations" he's on.

(However: if he gets a cut/scrape, he definitely licks the blood off. He's the specific kind of weirdo that fits the "licks his own blood as a deliberate conscious thing" archetype. You know the type. Adolescent pseudo-goths keen to develop morbid fascinations.)

#anonymous #ask #bill goldilocks cipher

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not-poignant · 6 days

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hi pia i just wanted to respond to what you said in your tags about the burnout w chronic illness. and i dont mean to condescend or blame but i think your burnout came about because you are an absolute beast of a writer!!!!! the amount of words you were pushing out consistently had me wondering what kind of spell you must’ve been on. (in a good way, except it turned out to be harming you) you worked really really hard for a long time, i think harder than many healthy people even (my chronic illness could never). i know you also enjoyed writing (we enjoyed it too!), but that workload honestly never looked sustainable. the astounding part is not that you burned out, but that you managed to push for so long, despite your handicaps and hardships. want to be careful not to sound like im praising/blaming you. but you’re really just build different than a lot of folks. i hope you had time to recharge so far and keep taking it easy. i do miss your updates but i can assure you im fine waiting, as are your other readers! its really okay! get better soon 💐🐀💓

Hi anon,

This is very kind of you to say, but tbh, I don't think many people know how much some writers can, well, write.

I might seem like an over-achiever, but there are writers out there who easily write around 6000-10000 words per day, and release a book per month. I have met successful authors who aim for 150k or 200k at NaNo, because 50,000 words is 5 days of work to them.

It's hard for me to comprehend, because I know I can't do that. But likewise, I think many folks don't realise that I actually used to write a lot more than I do now!! For some years it was normal for me to write 50-80,000 words every single month. NaNo was a joke. That caused burnout, and so I adjusted down to a 25,000 minimum monthly wordcount which sometimes felt so easy that it was absurd. I now have a maximum which I have to adhere to per month (50k), because it's too easy to go past it.

For me, writing is relatively easy. It's still work, yes. I still need to put time into it. But I don't need to put in the same amount of time as someone who hasn't done it for thousands and thousands of hours. I don't need to put in the same amount of time as someone who can only touch type at 80 wpm, when I touch type at 120-150 wpm.

The amount of stories is an issue, and the number of chapter updates is an issue, but the actual output re: words themselves really isn't. In fact I've written more words this month than I did last month already, and will very likely hit my monthly minimum with the next chapter.

The things that contributed to my burnout are multifaceted. Getting a puppy. A death in the family. Not having access to the mental health drugs I need to function for a long period of time. Friendship disintegration. These things can cause burnout in anyone, even if they are working very sustainably, because they all require separate labour on top of the labour that someone is doing for their job.

When I come back from hiatus, I will not be writing less. I don't believe the wordcount is the issue and haven't for a long time. I will be scheduling out less chapters, because admin is overwhelming to me. If you told me that my job wasn't writing anymore, but I had to schedule + figure out when to post twice as many chapters, I'd fail, lmao.

So I will be addressing admin stuff! But the amount of words I was pushing out, anon, was completely sustainable, and in fact a highly reduced number compared to what I was pushing out 6/7 years ago. Anon, I have been pushing out this many words or more for 5 years without stopping until now. It's felt comfortable. It's been so much less than what I used to make myself write.

So yeah, again, it can be hard for people who don't do this professionally to imagine writing at this level. And all professionals are different. I couldn't write 150k for NaNoWriMo, but the people writing 100k a month find that extremely easy to do. How I feel about their output - that it's impossible (because it is for me) is not how they feel about their output. For them writing 50k a month to make it easy might be extremely laughable to them, like, 5 days of work and then they get 25 days off. That's sometimes how I've felt about 25k (though it's more like 10 days of work to me - which is great, because I have chronic illness lol, so I need a lot of rest days and periods).

The amount of words I was pushing out consistently will be the amount I go back to because that is truly the most sustainable part of my job. I don't expect folks who haven't plugged in as many hours into writing, and who haven't written millions of words to understand, but the fact is the more you do something, the faster you get at it. The more practice you have, the more competent you become.

That was actually how I knew the burnout was so bad, because the easiest part of my job - the words + the writing - was impossible last month, and I only ended up with 14k for the first time in 5 years, and had to make a call.

The reason the hiatus is so frustrating is that so much of it is being caused by external factors, and not actually the job itself. Like yes, I am working on too many stories, and I can address that, but I was actually doing much higher wordcounts when I was working on less stories.

It's all the extra stuff that becomes very overwhelming! But I'll get there anon, and my wordcounts aren't going anywhere.

#asks and answers #pia on writing #no one else can decide what is causing my burnout except for me and my therapists #and someone else being like 'i couldn't imagine writing your wordcounts so it must be that' is like #it's kind of you to want to problem solve it anon but that is not the problem #those word counts are actually the *solution* to #a different kind of burnout i had 5-7 years ago lmao #if a person cooks dinner every night all their life #and then has 20 other things in their life go wrong #so they can't cook dinner anymore #the thing they need to permanently stop is not cooking dinner #it's the 20 other things #aslkfjsda that's where i'm at #administrator gwyn wants this in the queue

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hoaxs · 4 months

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hey friend, sorry if this is a little personal or you don’t want to answer, please feel free to ignore, but why did you decide to give up alcohol? i want to myself and i think i should, but i’m having trouble giving myself the push to get there. i’m worried about things seeming bleak, or boring, or that i’ll have to explain everywhere. any advice or inspiration is much obliged. congrats!!!!!

hey! no bestie it isnt too personal at all! im super open about stuff like this so please feel free to ask anytime you have questions! im happy to be a support for you because this has been hard but its also been so so so worth it and i will never look back!! <3 my response may be triggering for some due to the content so im gonna put it under a cut! so trigger warning: alcohol, blacking out.

for starters some people just cannot handle alcohol the same way - its literally a brain, chemical thing... some people just can't do it. for me it was endless nights of blacking out, having no idea what i said or did, sick of throwing up all the fucking time and ruining clothes and rugs. im one of the people that if i have one drink it will almost definitely turn into six which turns into ten which turns into black out. i was a nice drinker, i got real obsessed with how much i love everyone and was super friendly so that wasnt apart of my issue. i just felt like... i dont remember what i did or said. it triggered my ptsd and anxiety, every single day after i went hard drinking i would be an anxious mess and feeling suicidal because i was embarrassed or anxious that i had done or said something super humiliating even though that wasnt my track record. i just dont have a healthy ability to stop. i have no off button once the alcoho hits my system so i cannot control how much i drink. i tried that, may times and it never worked. its an all or nothing kind of thing for me.

i also chase the dopamine hit - every sip of alcohol once you start to feel drunk continues to feel like a dopamine hit! thats why you dont realize youre drinking way more than you want to sometimes, because once your kind of out of your normal mindset it takes over and tells you its a great idea..... at least for me it did!

my girlfriend and i went to a taylor swift themed night a bar just days after our decision to get sober and we thought it would be terrible and uncomfortable and i was like "i cant sing or dance without alcohol no way this is gonna be fun" and we did have a wonderful time! there are so many fun mocktails and almost every bartender ive ever come across will be more than happy to throw something fun together for you if youre worried about being able to go out out.

my father is an alcoholic and he and i are estranged because of it. he has been extremely, extremely sick lately with liver and kidney issues from his drinking. and for obvious reasons, i dont wish to repeat that cycle in my near future.

pro tip: if you're somewhere where you order your own drink privately if you get a soda water/sparkling water with lime and ask for it in a rocks glass no one will ever know you arent drinking! i do this a lot when at weddings or parties because i dont feel like talking to drunk assholes about how great they think being drunk is lmao

anon i am more than happy to clarify anything or answer any further questions you have!! its intense to go at this alone, so seriously i got you if you need anyone. <33

alcohol can absolutely be a fun tool if used responsibly and great for celebrations and all that fun stuff but like... you dnot need it to enjoy it. but its expensive, too - in so many ways! so you save money if you just get yourself a pretty lil soda with lime and prance around and just have fun being yourself without a substance taking control for you.

im actually learning a lot more about myself and what i really want and need out of social situations because im in control of myself and my autonomy instead of not remembering what even happened.

#tw: alcohol #tw: blacking out

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the1975attheirverybest · 1 year

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The band's popularity is getting to him. In my opinion, him refering to the character as an asshole is sort of a reply to the recent backlash he has gotten. Like he's being an asshole because the character is an asshole and not because he's actually an asshole or because he necessarily believed the things his character said. I feel like he may be feeling somewhat trapped because from his perspective people are not getting what he's trying to do or the message he's trying to spread. Outside the fandom, people's opinion of him is really really bad at the moment and he's human and I know he's a dumbass sometimes but he has a good heart and seeing people talking about him that way has got to get to him. I don't know I'm really confused. I don't know what he means by being ALWAYS in character. When he's walking around LA/NY, is he in character? Because I've been wondering about all the random sightings (I'm not even focusing on the girls, idc) but they alway seem so random. And I've always thought that hey they are a bit more popular now but now I'm wondering if he intended for people to see him? I fucking hate this twink because now I'm gonna overthink every single thing he does lmao. I hope to god he's not being literal when he says he's in character even when he's off stage because that can't be healthy especially when, according to him at least, he's playing an "asshole". But even that is confusing because I wasn't perceiving him that way.

Okay, I couldn’t have said this better myself! Especially this bit:

feel like he may be feeling somewhat trapped because from his perspective people are not getting what he's trying to do or the message he's trying to spread. Outside the fandom, people's opinion of him is really really bad at the moment and he's human and I know he's a dumbass sometimes but he has a good heart and seeing people talking about him that way has got to get to him.

In his answer onstage he said “I don’t wanna perform off the stage anymore.” So, it would seem that the experiment of always being in character has run its course. I don’t THINK he’s been 100% in character all the time. Like on the streets of NY and all that. I think we were seeing him more often cuz thanks to tiktok, they’re bigger and more noticeable now, plus there are a few fans on tiktok, not to name names, who are connected to mutual friends of the band, and, like, know their whereabouts so they’d show up purposefully to track him down etc. that didn’t used to happen in the past. His interactions with fans and stuff have been pretty much consistent with how Matty has always been. Sweet, down to take time and talk to us, even go for 15 minute walks with two fans, sign their stuff, take pics. That’s always been him. Yeah, he sticks to the aesthetic and the “uniform” of the era, but I think stuff offstage is always genuine. Even if it starts off as pretend. He can’t help himself. It’s who he is. Idk, man.

As long as he’s happy and doing well. That’s all that matters in the end. Sucks that the larger public, beyond the fandom, won’t leave him the fuck alone. But, of course, he’s a human being with feelings. You’re a good egg, Matty.

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klonoadreams · 1 year

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I admit, I laugh for you answer.

Since my Spanish is actually Chilean, and I grew up with dubbed neutral series or with Mexicanisms, I can understand them very well, and of course, like all healthy rivalries, we laugh at castellano (the way we call Spanish from Spain to differentiate it).

I laugh even more thinking about the word "Mierda" , Spanish speakers (Mexican one) use it more as rudeness than anything else, but in castellano it's more like something bad, horrible, poop, I've even managed to understand that.

You saw my surprise when I saw Naruto doubled up in castellano and he said

"Esto es una mierda"

and I

"*shock* Mom!! Naruto say a bad word!!".

For me Mierda is shit.

And yes, I also had fun writing it so many times.

Leaving that aside, the opposite happened to me.

I had no idea who the Elite four were and why they were important or where my Alto mando was located?

Volo only appears with the things that his wild wife gave him? I mean food, berries, pokemon eggs, then what? a son?

I understand that Galar has a lot of publicity and sponsors (Leo's cape is proof) so who are Brie's sponsors? or those of the polydex?

Yeah, Castellano, I just go with Spain Spanish (aka, Castilian) to make it easier for those who don't know that.

I can mainly understand other types of Spanish, though my oldest brother's wife is Columbian and while I understand her, I have difficulties sometimes because SHE TALKS SO FAST. And some of the slang used made me just "huh?"

It doesn't happen as often as it did when she first came over from Columbia with her sons to marry my brother. But now my brother is starting to pick up some of her habits, because his way of speaking has sped up and LIKE, it's so fucking funny to me?? lmaooo

and honestly, mierda (for Mexican Spanish) reads to me the same way it does in French because French swears were some of the first things I learned while learning French (WHICH WAS A FUCKING MISTAKE< I SHOULD'VE CONTINUED HONING MY SPANISH AHHHH)

either way, that's funny lmao. And speaking of which, I fucking lost it because the Team Star Grunt at the front of the poison base literally says, "Miércoles" (keep in mind there was a child there so, lmaoo)

and because of Encanto (thanks to everyone explaining it when people were asking why they said Wednesday in Spanish), I KNEW exactly the meaning behind it, which made me wheeze so fucking hard.

(Scarnoa gonna mcfucking lose it)

Lmao, that's a mood with the Elite Four. AND PRETTY MUCH, that's how it is with Volo and his feral wife.

Shows up and makes everyone wonder "what the fuck is that"

and he just refuses to elaborate, just lets the baby do all the explaining by just existing.

Anyways Brie's sponsors are the makers of the clothes that she wears - specifically, her turtleneck, because of the specific cotton blend its made out of. It's of the Cottonee-Eldegoss blend, which I fixated on the instant I read Cottonee's Shield entry

Opal went all out for Brie, and Brie has since decided that "THIS IS IT. THIS IS ALL I WANT." and never looked back. And for the record, it's worth her money for all the shit she gets into, like the mud and grass curry and honey, and whatnot. And fights with Pokemon.

And yet, her clothes are as pristine as ever. Showing that yes, the price is worth it. So of COURSE the brand that made those clothes immediately sought her out and nabbed her. :V

Brie making back everything that she spends on her clothes, like hell yeah.

everyone else, idk, but that's definitely Brie's sponsor.

#ask #mmyrve #pokemon #pokemon scarlet and violet #pokemon sword and shield #pla #into the wild (fanfic)#also ran (fanfic)#no manches (fanfic)#brie (oc)#punch baby akari #scarnoa (oc)

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ravenkinnie · 1 year

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oh of course! I don’t think my question I too personal but it felt weird to just drop it on you without making sure it’s ok. Of course that doesn’t mean you have to reply. Please just ignore this if you think it is too personal. You are the only other person I „know“ with bpd and you always seem honest so I thought maybe you’d have some perspective on this.

So I have a new partner and they have bpd. We are really open about it and they taught me a lot. Recently they have been asking me a lot if I still love them and told me they have been feeling very insecure even when they logically know my feelings won’t just change overnight. They told me to look up „fp“ and how that was the intensity of attachment they had towards me. Now I really fell down a rabbit hole with this (especially on tik tok) and there are some people (with bpd themselves) who suggest people shouldn’t „feed“ this sort of attachment too much. Not ignoring the other person or rejecting them but setting clear boundaries and not reassuring them every single time. They said in the long run this would help them detach themselves again so they become more rational and less likely to act impulsively.

Ive talked to my partner about this and they said it sounds reasonable but difficult to handle for them as well. In the end we decided as long as we communicate openly it would all be ok.

Now that was like a month ago and lately my partner has become really detached. They won’t talk to me and when I caught them crying they told me to leave them alone. Now I know it’s not cool but I asked their friend if they knew what was wrong and they just said my partner has been feeling like it’s hard to maintain our relationship lately. Basically as I understand it they don’t feel loved enough but they also know those feelings aren’t rational and feel guilty about them.

Now of course you aren’t a therapist and my question isn’t really about this situation because that’s between me and my partner but all of this just made me wonder if there even is a universal way to support someone with bpd. I absolutely love them but more often than not it feels like both trying to connect more and keeping my distance is hurting them. And it’s starting to hurt me as well.

How do you as someone with bpd feel about the balance between closeness and detachment? Can it really work to try and „make them“ love you less so they can more easily handle a close connection in the long run?

Im sure of course there isn’t a one answer fits all but sometimes I feel like no matter how much I read about it I don’t quite understand how bpd affects the way people think and feel.

Im sorry again if this too personal and too much. Regardless of if you answer or not I hope you’ll have a nice weekend :)

tbh there's no general answer to this, people are just different. everyone experiences different parts of bpd differently and the way they navigate these things in relationships will differ. the thing about bpd attachments is that they are just not stable lmao and that makes forming relationships v hard because it feels like you can't control those emotions. I've experienced splitting in relationships before and it's a very difficult and crazy thing to experience and explain because you know its not rational but that doesn't mean that you can stop feeling these things. and honestly maybe it's controversial to say but there's a point where you have to accept that maybe recovery means not being in relationships like this for a while - not not forming connections at all but maybe not committed relationships like this because you need to reach a point of recovery where you can handle these things by yourself to some extent before you can learn to handle it with a partner.

now I'm not a bitch to be telling people whether that's something they should do because I've been in relationships continuously since I was 19 so I'm not the brightest example hshshsjsk but personally, one thing I learned is that you can't form a healthy attachment in a relationship until you can learn that you can be okay by yourself, whatever that looks like. I think it can look like a detachment but I think of it more like independence that allows you to rationalise those bpd feelings because you can handle that fear of abandonment better.

that's why I also don't like framing bpd as loving too much or sth, like forming this independence is not loving less, I don't love my girlfriend less now than I loved someone before her just because I feel more like my own person in our relationship and set boundaries that don't rely on needing to be dependent anymore. if you want to work on a healthy relationship despite issues that will pop up because having a disorder that fucks you over constantly will create friction, you need to work on your own identity and separate stable personhood too on top of emotional regulation that helps with mitigating issues related to splitting etc

#asks

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drustvar · 1 year

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🍄 APPRENTICEMBER - Day 2 🍄

Who is their LI? What’s their relationship like?

Rosie can mesh well with everyone except Nadia and Lucio, I'll give a brief run-down of dynamic and any background since she's not exactly the same as the apprentice in game. This also isn't covering the ships she has with other ocs! ♥

🥀Julian

(Starting with him first since he was the first route I played thru lmao). He and Rosie first met during the plague when they were both working in the dungeons. She was still kind of a mess from her break up with Asra at the time and she's truthfully one of those people who like. NEEDS to be in a relationship. Their personalities are rather similar so its no wonder that she quickly latched onto him and they fell for one another. On her deathbed she left him her amulet and her mother's mortar and pestle, the two most important belongings she had. Post-plague / in his route, she again latches onto him very quickly and becomes very very protective of him. The idea that he killed Lucio (although he actually hadn't) was also something she found very attractive, and she saw him as sort of a heroic figure. He's the one LI that she's really truly batshit about. TLDR; the codependency these two have with one another is not healthy but man is it fun to write LMAO || 🐻Muriel Unlike Julian, who unfortunately seems to magnify and / or mirror Rosie's anxiety, Muriel is fantastic at getting her to chill the fuck out. Out of the LI's, they're the ones who help one another to grow the most. They were friends for a long time, having met one another thru Asra. Their vibes are just very cozy and woodsy. Off the grid couple who minds their own business. In his story, (which I'm doing basically a complete overhaul of) as said before they really foster a lot of growth in one another. Rosie encourages him to stand up for himself, to voice his anger, and to let out his emotions instead of bottling everything up. Muriel encourages her to slow down and not dive head first into things. One of the big things thematically for them is that strength doesn't have to be loud and in your face. Simply continuing to exist in a world that has been unkind is strong.

|| ✨Portia Ohhhh my beloved gorls. What can I really say about them other than that they're like. THE cottagecore cat-girl dream. They have similar personalities, the only major difference (and sometimes point of argument) is how little Rosie cares for / trusts nobility, which obviously puts Portia in a bit of a hard place considering Nadia is 1. her boss and 2. has been so good to her (seriously what other ruler gives their head servant property??) Portia's story is also being reworked to fit Rosie better (mostly just adding more actual content to it), but a big part of their initial story is about boosting one another's confidence and being a confidant to one another, something both of them really need.

|| 🔮Asra

Asra and Rosie met when they were teenagers, when she'd managed to sneak into the Masquerade (something her Aunt had forbidden.) They became fast friends and even though her aunt wasn't fond of him, she did allow he and Muriel to stay in the shed on the property when the weather was bad. Asra was Rosie's first real friend, and really helped her to try to heal and break free from her aunt's abuse and control. They loved one another very deeply and were eachother's rock. Once the plague hit and her aunt died, Rosie felt a need to stay and try to help; the people of the city were all they really had. Asra didn't agree, and this led to a nasty argument that would ultimately lead to their breakup.

Post-plague, Asra sometimes wonders if he made the right choice. If Rosie had known, would she have rather have stayed dead? Her own mortality, her previous life, and their own shared past is something they would have to work to uncover in their timeline, since Asra also forgot much of his own past (be it from magic or a stress response). Once everything is said and done, they're definitely a very chill and laid back couple. But its never going to be exactly the same, be it for better or for worse :")

#apprenticember #rosie #not me saying 'small blurbs' and then dumping 2 paragraphs each OOPS

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bunny-rambles · 1 year

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Greetings, dear author. Hope ur not too surprised i sent an ask? Haha, by the way, as always, no pressure for answering at all, or some of those. And no rush! Take your time.

For "((REAL)) writer ask" ask. Lmao. Bear with me here, please. Plus i hope its not too much questions for one person? If so feel free to cut some of those and ill send another one later.

1. ✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

2. 💘Is there any posted fic you want to rework/re-edit/re-write?

3. 💫what is your favorite kind of comment/feedback?

4. 💋when you leave comments on a fic, do you want to hear back from the writer?

5. 🕯️how do you think engaging with each other through tumblr, twitter, comments, kudos, creates healthy fandom experiences? How do you deal with that if you're not a social person/experience social anxiety?

Hello again 💞

✨) hm… well having a wonderful friend wanting to constantly read all of your old works and rb them makes this question a little difficult to answer ehe… uhm, but I would say maybe the xiao cat fic I did? It really didn’t get much attention, and the xiao piece I did before that also really didn’t do well. (I’ll link them both below) so probably those. It upset me quite a bit because I thought they were pretty good but it seems no one really shared my opinion

Just this once

Miao

💘) yes, many of my old works from the beginning of my time here, especially ‘that’s a little fishy’. I feel like my writing has improved significantly over the time I’ve spent on tumblr and I think that specific one deserves a rework because the prompt was so interesting to me !!

💫) ‘you’re such a talented writer’ or ‘wow your writing is top tier’ are some of my favourites due to the fact that I doubt myself a lot if I’m even good at what I do- so having some reassurance that I’m actually talented in some way, that some people can see worth in my words, that really means something to me <33

💋) due to my horrific attention span these days, I really don’t read all too much anymore and if I do, it’s usually on ao3. however, in the past, I’ve always commented about how the piece makes me feel and the events that happened that stuck out to me. Ooooh, or phrases they used that sound particularly pretty to me, I always love complementing on their use descriptions <33

🕯) this one’s rather difficult, but I suppose, go forward with the thought of not everyone is nice in this space, but not everyone is mean either. It’s a mixture of many different people all with a shared interest, and you’ll find someone to connect with over it at some point. And I think uplifting one another, commenting and sharing each other’s works, is really what glues the community together. It creates connections, helps the author feel good about themselves and their talent, overall it’s a very positive experience. I don’t have a lot of moots but the ones that I do make this experience far more pleasant, and communicating with others who share the same interests as you is precious :,). About anxiety, pace yourself and realise that this is not a race, it’s a marathon. You don’t have to push yourself to deal with negativity or rush to get content out. If it’s stressing you out, take a break or slow yourself down. You might find that’s exactly what you need sometimes !!

#buns notes #bun speaks #greensheepishnerd #tag games

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agape-bakery · 3 years

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ah, may i please request the brothers with an MC who was summoned without their glasses, but just? didnt say anything?? and after an absurd amount of time (like a month or two) they're just like "oh, yeah i need glasses i cant rlly see anything lmao"

with a GN or male mc please :)

thank you, have a wonderful day! -🐱

Me in about 3 years- This was pretty difficult to do so it took me so long to finish and it still ended up shorter than I wanted it to be, so sorry about that anon!

Would like to give a small reminder that this is not how the brothers would react canonically, especially for Belphie's scenario!

The Brothers with an MC who needs glasses

Lucifer

He thought you were making a poor attempt to be intimidating in the beginning by how hard you were squinting whenever you look around

He then thought that you needed glasses but by the way you didn't say anything, he assumed that was not the case

During the month, Lucifer is CONVINCED that you needed glasses

He's the Avatar of Pride but he's not that prideful about glasses....kind of-

After weeks of watching you rub your eyes and squint, he finally decided to ask if you needed glasses

Your eyes light up and you quickly nod and then go, "I actually forgot to told you I need glasses lol-"

....

WHAT

Lucifer would stare down at you with the most wide-eyed confused look he has ever given someone in his whole life

"MC, what do you mean you forgot?"

"I just forgot!"

Lucifer would take a long sigh before shaking his head, while he's exasperated, it's better late than never

Even if he acts annoyed, he'd still buy you some glasses as a gift

He now has more reasons to believe his gut, especially when it comes to you

Mammon

He most likely wears those sunglasses not because he thought it was cool but because his eyes are blurry from staring at his phone all the time-

As he was a demon, he didn't need to use it all the time

But when he saw you squinting, he was already in front of you with his hand up, smirking like he didn't experience the same thing in the past

"I saw you squinting, MC, how many fingers am I holding up?"

"Haha, real funny."

You completely forgot to tell him that you actually did need glasses and moved on with your day

The longer you did that, the more Mammon grew concerned, is this a habit??? Are you fucking with him just because he asked you how many fingers he was holding up??

When he finally confronted you after psyching himself in front of his mirror:

"MC, do you really need glasses??"

"Oh yeah, I was supposed to tell you that a month ago but I forgot."

"WHO FORGETS ABOUT NEEDING GLASSES? IT'S LITERALLY RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU-"

Don't worry, if you mention wanting the same glasses as his but with your prescription, Mammon would leave it aside to look for a matching pair-

Leviathan

This guy NEEDS the high prescription glasses with blue light filter 24/7

He stares at the screen all day, tell me he doesn't need it-

Anyway, he might have noticed that you need one in the beginning but didn't think too much of it and left it alone

He found out while he was playing a game with you and you weren't doing too good unless you lean closer/back

He doesn't mind carrying but while his eyes were focused on the screen, he asked if you were alright

You were his lover, after all, he didn't want you to get a headache or something because of him

You nod your head and tell him that it's because you need the glasses to fully see

As soon as the game was over, he was like, "Legit???" and couldn't believe his ears when you confirmed it

Dealing with glasses was difficult enough but he couldn't imagine playing while not wearing contacts or glasses

The day after that, you now have matching glasses with your boyfriend, now the both of you can act like the smart people in anime :D

Satan

Most likely wears reading glasses but that's it

He instantly knows that you need it because who squints like that?

But he doesn't have your medical files so he couldn't say for sure

It didn't hurt to ask though

"MC? Forgive me if this sounds offensive, but do you always squint like that?"

"Oh! I didn't tell you? I need glasses!"

"Have you not been wearing contacts or glasses this past month??"

"I forgot..."

Satan thinks of a solution, not wearing glasses when you need it, especially with bad vision might further harm the eyes so he tags along with you to get one

Frankly, he doesn't mind if his lover has glasses, he thinks it's endearing!

Asmodeus

Cares a lot about all of his body and makes sure to take care of them all the time so he didn't really need glasses, well, the ones with prescription that is

Honestly could have been one of the brothers to let you remember much earlier

Because he also spends time on his eyes, making sure it gets its needed rest, he might know something about glasses

And he noticed how you seemed to need one whenever you look at something close/far away

He hugs your arm, looking at you with a worried pout, "Hey MC, you've been staring in space and squinting for a long while, are you okay?"

As you reassured him and tell him that you just forgot your glasses, he laughs it off, until he realized that you weren't wearing one for MONTHS

He's a little worried, what if your vision got worse?

As soon as school ends, he's taking you to the doctor! No buts!

Beelzebub

The brother who didn't notice until at least 4 months or longer (while the others took a few weeks or a month)

Another one who cares about his body to keep it healthy, eyes are very important and even if it was an annoying task, he isn't planning on making it worse

Might have seen you squinting and staring off in space with a mean look, but that's what Belphie and Lucifer do sometimes, so he thought it was nothing

Until you say it outright to him or someone tells him, or if your vision's getting worse, he wouldn't notice-

"Ugh...I can't believe I forgot my glasses of all things.."

"You needed glasses??"

He feels bad for not noticing sooner, so he vows to help find you if ever your glasses get lost or ruined

Belphegor

Menace

Would be fast asleep to notice your struggles

And if we're going the original route and the two of you just met, he wouldn't even care-

When he finds out that you forgot them and had to walk around with no glasses, he snickered

"Who forgets their glasses?" He flicks your forehead with a small smile before yawning

Would bully you lightly tease you for having glasses in the first place

"You need glasses to see? Too bad."

But if you really do feel sad about what he's saying, he'll feel a little bad and stops it, apologizing quietly

Even if it's a difficult task for him to stay awake, he wants to at least try one time for you and remind you where your glasses are and that you should wear it

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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shotorozu · 3 years

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hiiii! i was wondering if you could write some headcannons for kirishima, bakugou, and kaminari with a s/o with braces? i got mine on a couple days ago and i’m in quite a bit of pain🧍‍♀️

their s/o gets braces

character(s) : kirishima eijirou, bakugou katsuki, kaminari denki (bnha)

legend : [Y/N = your name] they/them pronouns used (gender neutral), quirk not specific

headcanon type : fluff, crack if you squint, mainly comfort (x reader)

note(s) : ahh i feel bad for you. it literally felt like my jaw got ripped off by a wendigo when i got braces for the first time. anyways, it’ll feel so satisfying once you can eat again!

»»————-　♡　————-««

kirishima eijirou

he was told to get his teeth fixed when he was younger, but he heard how painful it was— so he never actually went through with it.

moving aside that, he immediately goes to find you when he finds out that you’re out from the dentist

and oh— you have braces now.

“does it hurt?” he asks, when he glides through the soup isle. he doesn’t know why it hurts, but he heard that it helps.

“nope.”

but it did hurt. precisely, it felt like your jaw got bashed in by power similar to midoriya’s quirk.

he’s alarmed, because one, he hates seeing you squirm in pain, and two he made the foolish mistake by giving you one french fry when you asked him to

and your reaction wasn’t very pleasant

so, what can he do? he has no knowledge on this!

but wait, youtube exists. eijirou ends up binge watching on a bunch of braces videos, and he practically comes back a natural expert at taking care of new braces

eijirou lets you at all the ice cream he wants, at the same time- he manages to make yummy, but healthy and chewable meals for you for the rest of the week

when he sleeps in your bed, he makes sure not to turn in sleep— surprisingly cautious of his movements

trust me, when my brother didn’t have his own room yet, he almost elbowed my jaw in his sleep— and i only had braces for 6 hours then. so he’s surprisingly?? cautious.

fawns over the fact that your lips looked really swollen because of the new braces, “are you comfortable, cutie?” is what he says when he checks up on you

reminds you to brush your teeth, AND floss. sometimes he’ll do it for you just because he just so happened to walk in when you were flossing LMAO ITS SO WEIRD BUT 💀 its eijirou

has his way of keeping you away from foods like popcorn and bubble gum “Y/N! if you put that down, we can eat this OTHER chewable thing together!”

anyways— he’s the perfect caretaker in my opinion. but eijirou ends up overdoing the research

“have you ever considered buying a water floss?”

... “eijirou, regular floss is fine, y’know?”

bakugou katsuki

this man- omg. [que shiny teeth and me]

his teeth are perfect. he has no history of cavities, and every single tooth grew in correctly. he brushes, and flosses regularly too.

if you don’t tell him you’re getting braces AT LEAST the day before, he’ll be really mad

he’s probably the one that accompanies you to the dentist. he’s willing to inhale that oddly satisfying and weird dentist office smell, and sit in a chair for a hour, staring at a weird soap drama

just so he could accompany you back.

listens to the dentist’s instructions, because he must. know. everything. and besides— you’re probably too bugged out to pay attention.

he knows that it doesn’t hurt around the first 20 minutes or so, but he’s still going to take some extra precautions.

first of all, no more begging for the usual food cravings, because if you do— oh boy.

he’ll stare at you like you’re crazy “what? and you think you can eat that shit? no.” he says, as he gets a spoonful of soup, blowing on it, so it’s not too hot

second of all, he’ll watch you brush your teeth. he might even scold you if you brush too fast.

watches you floss, and smirks when you finish

“don’t be so down about it,” he’ll say in his usual manner “you can have all the disgusting meals you want after the first week”

that makes you smile

“,,just no more gum, popcorn—”

oh, and he’s really strict about that. he’ll yank it out of your hand if you dare to eat anything that’s in the list of ‘the forbidden’

he’s a mean caretaker :,) but he does an excellent job at being one. on the good side, he’ll kiss those lips for yours after the first week has been completed

“don’t be so down about it. your teeth will be perfect just like mine in [insert year of braces removal]”

kaminari denki

denki probably had a few cavities here and there, but his teeth are okay.

he was sort of left in the dark about it :,) because you thought it would be a great idea to surprise him.

you told him you were going to the dentist again which was weird to him because who goes to the dentist 3 times in one month??

denki’s appalled when he sees your eyes tearing up, as he happily waltz into to your room.

“oh no! what happened?” his expression falls, “are you hurt? what can i do?”

“surprise?” you show him your teeth, now fixed with braces

and he’s just :0 what’s that on your teeth?

“you didn’t tell me!” he whines, since he was left in the dark, and while you sheepishly smile at him— he observes your teeth

you open your mouth to answer him, but he shakes his head “don’t answer! i’ll go fix something up for you, even though i’m mediocre at best with cooking— oh well, want anything?— oh wait, just nothing chewable, right?”

similar to kirishima, he doesn’t know why it’s so painful— but he can imagine the pain with the way you’re describing it.

he distracts you by making you laugh, since laughter is the best medicine— but he makes sure not to go too overboard (because he thinks stretching your jaw out would be too much)

ends up replacing your toothbrush with one that had softer bristles, as he tends to get side tracked with the monitoring thing rip

oh, but he does watch you floss your teeth. y’know— what if you accidentally bump your hand against your jaw? he’s thoughtful of that.

for once, it looks like he actually knows about taking care of your braces, even more than you (it looks temporary but hmm.. we dont know)

but after that excruciating week, he DEADASS asked you if he could touch them 💀

“pleasee? what— it doesn’t hurt anymore, does it?”

“denki, don’t even try—”

when you get your braces adjusted, he’s always the one that picks your colors (if you could pick the colors., if that makes sense.)

gets sad when you don’t choose the color he wanted because they ran out of that color. its not even your fault whkdwks

denki was really sad to hear that yellow made your teeth look yellow, and black made it look like you had cavities :,)

overall, he might’ve had some moments where he absolutely missed on the care taking part. but he did his very best! please know that.

the bakusquad is surprised to see his search history— which namely had the keywords ‘braces’ in all of them. they teased him for it

»»————-　♡　————-««

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby

do not plagiarize, reupload, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission

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fill-me-with-your-memes-daddy · 3 years

Text

Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]

So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.

Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad

Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.

STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.

IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.

STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.

Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him

So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.

NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT

The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable

Those husky animation models suck lmao

Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!

God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it

Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that

But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????

Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden

This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh

Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)

THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much

Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)

Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens

On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending

Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other

YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).

Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last

Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!

Oh never mind slavery trollmarket

Bruh titanic camelot

I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things

NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH

STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER

THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN

WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?

Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person

For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues

Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy

Bruh I was grieving

PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference

Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?

NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS

Oh thank God he's okay

NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD

oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))

But I want to see him again

But I'm glad to see vex

Yay they're in arcadia!

But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((

Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)

Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them

Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus

DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE

Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.

BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.

Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.

Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???

And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole

And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!

THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!

BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????

Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭

Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora

HUZZAH

NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????

STAB THAT BITCH JIM

WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED

Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it

SEVEN KIDS?????????

T O B Y ????????????

W A I T NO

N O

IS HE ACTUALLY

OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE

NO THERE ISN'T

F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED

Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS

I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH

W A I T

HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????

HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????

WAIT IS HE

BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON

HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????

BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending

TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all

And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.

#tales of arcadia #rise of the titans #trollhunters #rott #rise of the titans spoilers #rott spoilers #toa #3 below #athena's own original post!#jim lake jr #claire nuñez #toby domzalski

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adorerdraco · 4 years

Text

Healing Heart ✧ Draco x Reader Mini-Series PART 5

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Summary: PART 5 ! of Draco accidentally falling in love with reader during his sixth year (HBP) and figuring out how to survive his new life while finding out a way to keep you in it.

Warnings: angst, mentions of death, torture, blood, death eater stuff - the usual !

Words: 7.8K

A/N: FINDING WAYS TO PROLONG THIS SERIES !!!! 😼 AND SORRY IF THERE ARE ANY MISTAKES ITS VERY LATE AND I NEVER CATCH THEM 😔 but omg my little week long hiatus I took was against my will but i’m back and healthy again and can finally think out sentences again lmao !!! also i DO own gif

Draco stared at the vast, dark marble ceiling as he lied awake. His black silk sheets were strewn across his king bed in a lofty heap from when he had woken up. There was a sheen layer of sweat across his skin, but his room held no warmth and the draft that was coming in from his open windows was nothing less than freezing.

There wasn’t a moment where he had enough peace to sleep, but when he ultimately did; he always regretted ever drifting off when he felt the hot, ravenous feeling that ran through his body when he would jolt awake from a nightmare with his heart thundering against him and the inability to differentiate reality from a subconscious image. He would lie back down, breathing unevenly, and fixate on a random crack in the ceiling and let his now very tortured conscience remind him, “it all happened, you can't escape it!”

And that little malicious voice in his head was right. The horrible images in his mind weren’t made up or conjured by his brain - they were very real and he had lived through them.

He remembered the agonizing decision he had to make when he left the love of his life, jinxed and in hysterics in an abandoned classroom. He remembered his Headmaster, who he had cornered and disarmed who still offered him genuine help and guidance despite the wand pointed in his face. He remembered his once-favorite Professor, kill his Headmaster who he thought for maybe a second would be able to help him. He remembered bounding down the steps of the astronomy tower, wanting to topple over and vomit while he followed closely behind a billowing cape and several sniggering and smug Death Eaters into the halls of the unsuspecting school. He remembered his aunt wreaking havoc on the Great Hall with pure joy as he could only watch in horror while she shattered the windows in her celebration. He remembered walking through a maze of trees in a dazed stupor towards Hagrid’s hut, Bellatrix giggling maniacally beside him as she skipped past him. He remembered seeing Harry run towards them, hurling any hexes and curses he could think of towards Snape while he scurried off. He remembered meeting his mother at the momentarily failing barrier, her hand wrapping tightly around his arm before she apparated them home. He remembered the cold wooden floors underneath him and the way the Manor’s structure seemed to be crashing down onto him as he tried to catch his breath and collect his thoughts.

When he would finish going over every mistake he had made that night, and every choice he could have made instead, he would turn over in his bed and stare out the large window in his room where he could see the cloudy night sky and the nature swinging around in the wind like it was in a constant state of what seemed like an approaching tornado. He would wonder about you, and what you were doing and what you thought of him. He wondered if you meant what you said - if you would truly never forgive him for leaving you there. He wondered if you thought it was him who killed Dumbledore and how you probably saw him as a killer now. He was in ceaseless disarray of wonder, a painful wonder that he couldn’t escape.

He didn’t dare try to owl you, especially with Bellatrix around the house as a very vigilant guard dog that noticed anything and everything. There were barely any opportunities in which he could leave the Manor, not by foot, by broom, or apparate. He was a prisoner in his own home, just as much as he was in his mind. The increasing amount of Death Eaters that came and went every day made him feel more unsettled than ever, all of them giving him intimidating and sneering looks as if he was a joke while they forcefully turned the Manor into their place of 'work'.

The day Lucius was released from Azkaban, Draco felt a slight hope that things would improve, that his father could somehow find a way to fix things for them as he always had and the young boy could finally step down from the responsibility he felt for his family. But what he saw in the foyer of his home wasn’t Lucius Malfoy; influential, formidable and feared by many - he saw a shell of a man who had lost all sense of who he was and had paid greatly for his failures. He recalled how his father had embraced him in a weak and shuddering hug, clinging onto him as a spew of desperate words incessantly flew from his mouth without making much sense.

He knew immediately then that his father couldn’t swoop in and fix all his problems, and his mother couldn’t be left alone in all this. He was stuck, whether he liked it or not, and he had to follow through on anything and everything the Dark Lord expected from him or wanted out of his family.

He hated the way his home was defiled with death and wickedness. He hated the way there were lifeless bodies littered around the living room sometimes. He hated the echoing cries and pleas of those who were locked up in the dungeon below. He hated seeing Voldermort use his home as his headquarters, pacing the room in a self-given majesty and humiliating his father every chance he could get. The only reason the Malfoys weren’t killed off yet was, in Draco’s opinion, to be used as an example of what happens when you fail the Dark Lord, to be used as malicious entertainment, and to see just how far someone could be tortured from the inside. Draco did mend the cabinet, but he didn’t kill Dumbledore or die trying as his master had desired. He was always visibly apprehensive of everything he had to do and every order he was given. He wasn’t willingly cruel or vile and hated the idea of actually hurting anyone. His father had failed every mission he was given, and his mother wasn’t a Death Eater, to begin with. They were just there, as pawns and as sadistic pleasure.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

It was subsequently, a rare day that the Manor was empty. No one was walking through the halls or running their mucky shoes on the expensive upholstery of the furniture as they relaxed into it. Even his father was out, along with Bellatrix, which left only him and his mother at home.

Narcissa Malfoy was just as arrogant as her husband, valued the pro-pure-blood ideals she grew up with, and always appeared to be very cold and haughty. Yet there was one thing that she valued above most; her family. She was entirely devoted to her son and husband and loved them profoundly. It was for Draco she worried for the most and would do anything for. It was for Draco she would risk everything for and go against the Dark Lord for.

So on the night she brought her son back home, and he was breaking down in her arms with cries about a girl she had never heard of - it piqued her curiosity more than she wanted to admit. She had asked Draco who you were a handful of times since that night, but he always refused to answer. She even went as far as asking Snape, pulling him aside one night behind a dark pillar in her home as everyone was leaving and whispered secretly to him.

“Severus, I know I’ve asked too much of you already but I need to know this,” she rushed to say in a very hushed and imperceptible tone but she knew he had heard her. He raised an eyebrow, looking at her quizzically.

“What might that be?”

“On the night Draco came home, he was calling out for someone,” she began, “do you know if he was involved with anyone by the name of Y/N?”

She could have sworn she saw a twinge of muscles move in his cheek, but he only shook his head shortly from side to side.

“I apologize, Narcissa, but I know no student by that name,” he sighed. “Draco spent most of his time mending the vanishing cabinet, I doubt he had time to be venturing out in his love life.”

She wanted to believe him. But she couldn’t brush off the intuition that was beating against her gut, nearly screaming at her that she was being lied to and there was more to the story. It’s not like she wanted the information to hurt you or to judge, she simply wanted to know who had broken through to her son during the year he was the most closed off. Who had impacted him so greatly, that now that it was seemingly over left him in shambles and withdrawn almost completely. If anything, she wanted to help. And if there was a possibility where she could, she would help Draco take it if it meant it would make his life easier. There was nothing more she wanted for him, free of pain and filled with hope, and if a certain individual would help her get him there - she would be willing to see it through.

With the opportunity of everyone gone, Narcissa trailed up to Draco’s room, letting her knuckles fall softly against the wooden double doors three times.

“Draco, dear, would you like to join me on a walk?”

She heard a shuffling from behind the door and a sharp sniffle, taking in a deep breath to prepare herself to see his poorly hidden tears that she knew she would be met with.

As she predicted, the doors opened and the blond stepped out of his room, lowering his red-rimmed eyes to the ground so he wouldn’t have to meet her worried gaze. He looked well-groomed as always, but she took notice that his skin seemed gray and dull. His eye bags were deep and nearly black from all his crying and lack of sleep. When she linked her arm through his, she felt the slight weight he had unwillingly lost in the past month that he’s been home. Her mind was spinning with concern, promising herself there that she was ready to do whatever she could for him, anything she could.

She led them out of their cold and darkened home, stepping out into the gardens that sat behind the Manor in a large vastness of gorgeous flower arrangements of whites, greens, and reds. There was a large marble fountain placed in the middle of the garden, spewing water smoothly from a small bowl that spilled into a larger one beneath it. It was boxed in with stone and surrounded with red amaryllis flowers, giving anyone enough space to sit around it without being splattered by droplets of water.

It was a gloomy day, but a warm afternoon sun had peaked through the clouds and cast a glowy light around the house that she hadn’t seen in ages. It made her feel hopeful as she walked her and Draco through the garden, thinking of ways on how to approach him. She knew he had shot her down and changed the subject every time she brought up your name, even if it was in privacy, and she pleaded to the stars that this would ultimately be the chance she would get to find out.

When they reached the fountain, she sat them down and watched as Draco slouched, silent and staring distantly at his shoes.

“Dear, I know you hate for me to bring this up,” she started slowly, shaking her head as she spoke, “but I want to know who she is. I want to be able to help you, and maybe even her. I know you’re in love, I see it in your eyes and I see it now that you’re apart. I know everything else certainly applies to how you’re feeling, but there’s a look for heartbreak, and you have it.”

Draco looked up at her, finally peering into her worried eyes as he contemplated what she said and what she offered. The last time he told someone about you, he was reprimanded and denied any sort of help, only suggestions for abandonment were given. He wanted to tell his mother all about you, but he wished it was under happier circumstances, however.

He wished it would be him coming home during the summer, no Voldermort or Death Eaters in his life or his family’s, and arriving with you by his side after sending an owl to his parents about the new love in his life he wanted them to meet. He would boast about you and your smarts, care, ambitions, and beauty. He would make sure his parents understood just how important you were to him and just how amazing you truly were. He imagined their inevitable surrender and allowing him to invite you on one of their luxurious trips to somewhere beautiful and expensive. He pictured a yacht ride in Italy, your skin glowing and your smile bright as you gazed at him in delight under a warm summer sun. Or a grandeur trip to France, walking around the Parisian streets with you as he spoiled you with gifts and delicious gourmet food while ending the night under the Eiffel Tower. He wanted to see you leave on shopping trips with his mother, the two of you coming back with heavy bags and new memories while his mother would walk by him and secretly whisper, “I love her!” to him. He wanted to flaunt you, and boast and gloat all about you - but the circumstances now were dreadful, and to talk about how he had failed you made him want to cry all over again.

His mother waited patiently for his reply, clasping her hands together in her lap as he stayed quiet while he decided. He was so used to sulking and torturing himself on his own in the past month, that seeing a genuine look of concern and desire to help pushed him into making his final resolve.

“I met her around the beginning of last year,” he breathed out finally, “her name is Y/N Y/L/N, we had a Potions class together but I met her in one of the corridors where we accidentally bumped into each other. I sprained a finger trying to catch myself and she healed it without a second thought. She wants to be a Healer at St. Mungo’s after Hogwarts, and she’s very skilled with her wand. She’s one of the smartest people I’ve ever met and the kindest. She always listened to me, and helped me, and encouraged me. She always reassured me when I needed it, and if it weren’t for her I don’t think I would have mended the cabinet or even had the energy to wake up every day. She stayed with me even when I told her the truth about everything. I’ve never met anyone who makes me feel the way she does, I can’t explain it, she makes me feel-”

“Alive?” His mother softly finished for him. “She makes you feel alive.”

“Yes,” he nods fervently, “I love her and I failed her. I don’t think there’s anything I can do now and neither can you.”

“I beg to differ,” she briskly interjects. “It’s never too late for anything, Draco. There’s always an opportunity to make things right, as long as you try. She at least deserves an explanation and an apology, and it will be up to her to decide what she wants to do. She sounds wonderful, and I’m glad you met someone who brings out your best.”

Draco agreed wordlessly, his tears sitting at the brink of his eyelids begging to be released as he mulled over everything that was said. He knew where you lived, having learned the fact somewhere in your relationship when you were talking about your childhood and where you were from. He knew the place you called home and the address that came with it that you constantly reminded him of in hopeful jokes that he would visit you over the summer.

“There’s no one here, no one would know you’re gone,” Narcissa encourages swiftly as if she knew what he was thinking about. “It’ll be a few hours before anyone returns. Go to her.”

“But if I become involved with her again, he’ll find out, won’t he?” He insinuates in distress. “The reason I left her was to keep her safe from him, I don’t want her anywhere near this.”

“He won’t find out,” she promised, “I’ll make sure of it. Go.”

There was a hopeful and elating sensation that ran through his veins as he stood up, turning back to look at his mother as she nodded at him optimistically. He suddenly lunged towards her, giving her a tight hug and muttering thank you’s to her like a broken record before running out of the garden towards the front gate of the Manor.

As soon as he reached his exit, he used his newfound Death Eater ability to half-apparate himself into a thick black cloud of smoke that allowed him to fly over to where you were - not giving a care in the world if he were seen by muggles as he recklessly took every shortcut he knew towards your hometown.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

There was a slight breeze in the cloudy air that brought you comfort. It was cold, but refreshing - a sharp contrast against the burning feeling that never seemed to leave your body. You were back home now, in your small little town in England that held little to no wizards.

You spent a lot of your time wandering around the local stores and cafes nearby, mingling with strangers as you told them fake life stories for fun. There was also the small forest behind your house you regularly enjoyed, and all the small hidden creatures that you encountered along the way. You always brought along your family cat, the chunky orange tabby always finding his way for you outside of the forest when you got too far in, or if he sensed there was nearby danger and would warn you. Sometimes you would talk to him, complain to him about everything that was bothering you and he would respond to you now and then with broken meows and chirps that made you feel like he understood, even though he didn’t. It made you feel less alone.

Of course, you had your family that worried over your changed behaviors. They weren’t oblivious. They noticed the puffy eyes, the sniffles, and the quiet sobs that escaped under the space of your bedroom door when they would pass by in the middle of the night to get a glass of water from the kitchen. They noticed your sudden quietness, and your lack of interest in everything and hardly found you in the house. You were always out and about, trying to find anything and anyone to distract yourself from what was going on in your mind.

It wasn’t that you didn’t want to talk to your family, even though they had incessantly offered their support, you just knew they wouldn’t understand. They would want to know about Draco, his family, and their beliefs. They would eventually figure out of his involvement with the Dark Lord and the looming second Wizarding war. They wouldn’t approve, and you didn’t want to hear the scolding you would get for ever giving him the time of day. You were bitter enough as it was, and the last thing you wanted to hear was how bad Draco was and how you were better off without him.

But even if you were supposed to be better off without him, a life where he wasn’t in it didn’t feel good at all. It felt empty and lost. You were used to his presence always being around you and how he was always a few minutes away from you. He was always available to you for anything and willingly; for company, affection, comfort, reassurance, love, everything. You hated the fact that you let yourself get attached, especially when you knew deep down the direction the relationship was going in.

There were days when you would wake up okay. Days where your mind blocked out your feelings entirely, including Draco and all the memories that came with him. There were days when you felt like you had finally forced yourself to move on, but always finding it to wear off when you’d clamber into bed at night and your brain started illustrating everything you didn’t want to remember. The silver band bracelet he had gifted you was in constant movement from your wrist and jewelry box, hidden on the days you wanted to forget him or sitting pretty on your skin on the days you missed him the most. As much as it hurt to think about him and remember him, you couldn’t stop the way your whole being drifted towards him.

You were currently stepping over a big fallen tree trunk covered in thick green moss, your cat following closely by your leg as he pranced and jumped over all his obstacles. You walked mindlessly around the greenery, not taking notice in the shape of the leaves of the fern you were placing your hand upon to move out of your way. It wasn’t until you felt the sharpened ends of the leaves dig deep into your skin that made you recoil your hand back in pain, a slight hiss leaving your mouth as a small gash began to form with blood flowing quickly upwards out of the new cut. Your hand was held in the air as you frantically looked around for anything that would stop the bleeding that was now dripping sleekly down your arm.

“Stupid ministry and underage magic,” you mutter under your breath. Your wand was in your pocket, begging to be used, but the idea of being sent a letter from the ministry that was now under the Voldermort's control quickly dispersed any desire you had to use it. “Come on, kitty. Let’s go back home, please.”

'Home' was a word the cat did understand. He bumped your leg with his head before meowing loudly at you as he began trotting off to your right side towards the exit of the forest. He moved stealthily, dodging in and out of everything that was in his path as you attempted to follow in his cleared steps. Every time you would trip or rest briefly, he would stop ahead of you and wait until you would walk towards him again before he started back on the journey.

When you finally saw your house in the distance, you sighed in relief at the thought of your first aid kit waiting patiently for you in the bathroom cupboard. And belatedly, your feet hit the stone path that led home, skipping slightly with your hand in the air before nearly toppling over your cat as he stopped abruptly in your path. You moved out of the way, last minute, and very clumsily before eyeing him suspiciously.

He was looking up at the sky, his ears pulled back and the fur on his back straightening up as his eyes frantically searched around the clouds above him. He wasn’t hissing like he normally did when he felt something dangerous coming, he looked more confused and alert than anything. You searched the sky with him for a minute before concluding he was being too wary so you bent down and pick him up with your uninjured hand, nearly scooping him into your arms until he carefully swiped at your arm.

“You’re being dramatic, there’s nothing there,” you exclaim at him irritably. You were stumped, on one hand, literally, you were still bleeding though it had significantly slowed down and was now just coagulated blood, and on the other hand, you couldn’t leave the cat outside because of the number of dead critters he left in his past outdoor ventures around the yard and his sometimes week-long disappearances that left everyone in the house worried.

In just a few seconds of your thinking, he had sprung forward and rushed towards the large open field that was a few feet away from your house. Although it was summer, it had been rainy and allowed the grassy field to flourish in tall and wild greenery. This did not help as you watched the fluff of orange disappear into the small jungle that lied ahead and you began to sprint after him, spotting his bushy tail in your vision every time he jumped over something. If you could use magic, this little ordeal would have gone much more different - but you couldn’t.

You chased him until the very near end of the field, spotting him sitting calmly as he looked back at you as if he was expecting you. Rolling your eyes, you reached towards him again to pick him up, if he wanted to go back to the house scratching and biting then so be it. You trained your gaze on him, trying your best to grab him as carefully and as slyly as you could. But as soon as your hand landed on the silky fur of his back, you heard a soft whooshing sound a few feet away in front of you and a very audible shuffle of dead grass crunching underneath someone's shoes as they moved slowly.

You didn’t look up, all of a sudden feeling scared at who could have magically appeared in front of you, and instead, you waited for your cat to hiss and attack, but he sat himself down in a loaf as if he were in the most comfortable place in existence. This is when you looked up, and the sight before you was like an invisible force that knocked you onto your bottom as you jumped back in surprise.

“What are you doing here?”

What was supposed to sound like a concerned question, came out a little ruder than you had intended, almost seething at the boy that was fearfully staring down at you.

“I’m sorry,” Draco ran his hands over his pallid face in distress, “I shouldn’t have come.”

There was an awkwardness that hung in the air. The two of you were finally where you had wanted to be, together, but now that you were face-to-face it couldn’t have been more perplexing. He didn’t know how to begin, and you weren’t sure if you should even listen to him. It was like a weird staring competition, he was taking in everything about you as you were doing the same to him. It was obvious you were both a wreck, and the damage was apparent on him the most as he was dealing with his Death Eater status now more than ever.

“Your hand is bleeding,” he stated suddenly. You didn’t have time to answer before he had cautiously walked over to you and sat down beside you in a flattened patch of grass. “Let me see it.”

Like magnets, your hand instantly fell into his cold grasp without you thinking about it. You eyed him carefully and quietly, observing him as he turned your injured hand over in his and inspected your gash like you had done many times in the past for him. You didn’t stop him when he took his wand out of his pocket and waved it over your wound, murmuring a familiar spell that closed the cut with ease, a small pink scar left in its place.

“I didn’t know you knew how to do that,” you say lightly. “Thank you.”

“I learned from the best,” he smiles faintly.

Neither of you moved from your sitting spots, and neither of you said anything. He would meet your eyes now and then and search them with such a pained expression that it took everything in you not to just throw yourself into his arms and cry in relief that he was there.

“I know it was Snape who killed Dumbledore and not you,” you break the silence apprehensively. “Harry told me.”

“Potter told you?” He grimaced, but he let out a breath of relief. “I would’ve thought the git would have loved to throw me under the bus. I didn’t even know he was there, then I see him chasing us down-”

“Draco, why are you here?” You asked him again, gingerly this time and cutting him off from his rambling in hopes that he would just cut to the chase on his unannounced appearance. He sighed, looking down at his now muddy, once expensive dress shoes.

“I needed to see you,” he answers honestly. “And I wanted to apologize for how I left things.”

You peered up at him with a raised eyebrow, bringing your knees up to your chest so you could rest your head against them as you faced him. “Let’s hear it.”

“I’m serious,” he frowned. “I’m sorry I used my wand against you. I’m sorry I shut you out. I’m sorry I left without giving you much of an explanation. I’m sorry I abandoned you and disappeared off the face of the Earth. I’m sorry I broke my promise that I would never leave you again.”

“Draco-”

“No, wait, I need you to understand that I thought leaving you was the only thing that would keep you safe. I would have never forgiven myself if I let you die for trying to help me, even if you say you’re ready to accept whatever fate is in store for you, I’m not. But I don’t want to run anymore, I don’t want to be away from you, I can’t do it and I always think I can let you go for your safety, but I can’t.”

There was a brief period of stillness as you contemplated his apology. Your head moved to fall in between your knees as your hands began to fiddle with the long strands of grass beneath you. You were stripping it and pulling at it, hoping that there would be a hidden message underneath the earth that would give you an answer on what to say or what to do, but it wasn’t possible. The only thing you found was the loose pitiful tears slipping down your face that seeped into spots of dry soil. Draco stayed wordless beside you, the only sound coming from him was uneven breaths as he stressed over your reaction.

You were caught in between wanting to give in, wanting to forgive him, and hug him and kiss him to make up for all the tortuous time lost, but there was also a part of you that was now afraid to trust. You wanted to, so badly, but everything felt so unpredictable. You weren’t sure whether you could handle him leaving again if he had to. And if he were to die at the end of all of this? There was no way you’d be able to recover from a loss like that. He was on an unforeseeable path that held no clear outcome.

“I’m scared, Dray,” you sniffle, closing your eyes tightly as you began to answer him. “We’re not kids anymore fooling around at school. Everything is getting more real by the day. How am I supposed to be comfortable with the idea that you might-”

You stopped yourself from finishing, a soft sob escaping your throat at the near mention of his possible death. You felt him scoot closer to you, stopping about a few inches away from your shuddering body as he placed a reassuring hand on your lower back.

“You say you can’t accept the decision I made when I said I’m ready for whatever fate lies ahead of me,” you mumble miserably. “Well, I can’t accept yours either.”

“I won’t make any more promises I can’t keep,” he starts warily, “but I can promise you that as long as I’m around, I won’t let anyone hurt you, ever. And as far as my future goes, I promise that I’ll do everything and anything I can to survive this.”

You had unhooked your arms from around your legs, bringing them underneath you as you sat yourself up to face him better. He was staring at you intently, hopeful gray eyes boring into yours with every emotion under the sun flashing through them. He didn’t show it, but he felt like at any moment he was going to faint. He had never seen such uncertainty on your face and it killed him, but he tried to remain stoic as he spoke and kept a brave face at every concern you had. He couldn’t guarantee you anything that lied ahead, but there was also nothing he wouldn’t do for you now.

“Okay,” you agree, finally giving him the consolation he had been woefully praying for. “I believe you, we can get through this together.”

There wasn’t another second spared before you speedily moved out of your sitting position to pounce him with a tight and suffocating hug. It was desperate and smothering, his arms wrapped tightly around your lower back as he pressed you deeply into his body as if you were going to disappear any second.

You didn’t care that you could barely breathe against his chest or that your knee was digging into the mud below you. It was the most relieving feeling in the world, finally being in his arms again with new hopes and possibilities that always found a way to present themselves. It was one of the many reasons that you knew he was the one for you. Everything with him felt easy, even if the world was crashing down around you. He could melt away all your pain and worries with one look, touch, or words. He felt like home and heaven all in one.

It came to you in the middle of your longing hug, that there was always going to be something looming over the two of you in the current state that the wizarding world was in. There’s no point in wasting time when everything could change overnight, just as it had that unforsaken day at Hogwarts before you were dragged home the next day. There was no reason for trying to stay away from him when it was everything you wanted and you knew then that you needed to take advantage of whatever time you had left with him.

“I'm sorry for saying I would never forgive you that night,” you murmur into the crook of his neck. “And for being stubborn.”

“You had all the right to be angry with me,” he laments.

“But it didn’t make it okay,” you nuzzle yourself deeper in his embrace, frowning to yourself as you recalled the night.

He looked down at you, a pang of guilt hitting him when he saw the corners of your lips pulled down in sadness. He leaned down and carefully placed a kiss on your temple, lingering for a bit before moving away and muttering, “nothing about that night was okay.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

There wasn’t an inkling of an idea how long the two of you were sat outside, holding on tightly to each other as you filled each other in on any news that happened in the last month since you’ve seen each other. The only indication that let the two of you know that time had surely passed was that the sun had begun setting behind the valley in the distance. The moon now had a faint appearance in the purplish evening sky that was for the first time in a while, free of the heavy cloud covers.

You listened attentively as he told you about the Manor and how it was being used as a Death Eater meeting place. He told you about his father being released from Azkaban as a treat for the Malfoy’s since he had fixed the cabinet and disarmed Dumbledore for Snape to finish, unknowing to him that he would. He explained to you how ghostly he felt when he was venturing out of the school that night. He even scarcely described the horror that had gone on in the dead of night, when victims had been brought back to the house for ‘interrogations’ and the way their screams would keep him wide awake for days.

You nearly felt sick to your stomach the longer he went on, empathizing with him delicately when he would sometimes stop talking to take a deep painful shaky breath. The guilt that was eating away at him wasn’t hidden or pushed down, he expressed it very obviously and you couldn’t picture how he managed to hold a straight face in the sea of terrors he had encountered.

“You’re nothing like them,” you whispered tenderly to him when you saw the distant broken look that clouded his eyes. “You are good, Draco. Not once have I ever changed my mind about that.”

He was slipping, far and fast into the depths of his despair. His new life away from school was eating away at him now that he was forced to experience it upfront. He wasn’t cut out for it, nor did he want anything to do with it. It physically pained you that there was nothing you could do except offer him what you’ve always been able to provide; a listening ear and to remind him that he’s not the evil monster he deludes himself to be.

“I don’t want to talk about me anymore,” he mumbled gloomily, taking your hand into his as he turned to look at you. “I want to hear about you and your summer.”

“It wasn’t pleasant or anything, honestly,” you shrug, “I spent most of it in the village nearby and the forest behind my house with my cat, who by the way knew you were coming somehow.”

You both suddenly turned to look for the orange tabby who had seemingly disappeared without either of you noticing sometime throughout the evening.

“Where is the little critter so I can thank him for leading you to me,” he chuckled softly as you rolled your eyes.

“He’s probably back at home now but I’ll pass the message,” you bite back a smirk.

Draco felt the familiar fluttering of pixies in his stomach as he looked at you, a sense of exhilaration and delight shocking his body from its usual anguished state. He was so far gone in you and he never wanted to leave the feelings you left him with and with such little effort. He couldn’t count how many times he had the same thought in his head when he was around you, much like your own, he knew with you was where he was at his calmest and his happiest. It was like a chunk of agony being released from him that made him feel like he could breathe again without feeling like he was going to drown. Even if it was just for a few hours, he was always grateful for moments he shared with you and the comfort you brought him.

“I love you,” he said dazed, eyes locking onto yours intimately. “I hope you know that.”

"I love you,” you repeated, a coy smile making its way onto your features.

“You know,” his thumb began mindlessly running over your knuckles as he spoke, “if it wasn’t for my mother knocking some sense into me earlier, I wouldn’t have had the great idea to show up here.”

He looked over at you when he felt you tense up completely, slightly worried at first before a small amusement quickly replaced his fear when he noticed you were gaping at him with wide wondrous eyes.

“You told her about me?”

“All about you,” he nods, “I accidentally let your name slip a while back and she’s been asking me about you ever since. I didn’t want to say anything in case someone heard, but everyone was gone today and she got it out of me.”

“What did she say about me?” You asked him timidly as if it was the most important thing in the world for you.

He chortled quietly at your nervousness, “she said she thinks you’re wonderful and she’s glad we met. She pushed me to come and make things right with you and she offered to look out for us.”

There was an intense delight that beat against your chest at his answer. The only other person in his life who’s opinion he valued the most above all had made one about you, and it was one that was better than anything you could have ever hoped for. Narcissa Malfoy had vouched for you before she’s even properly met you and it left you feeling astounded and beyond appreciative.

“When you get home, please send her my regards,” you plead heartily, your hands clutching onto the lapels of his suit jacket as he laughed lightly.

“I will, I will,” he smiles, “I have to be home soon, so she’ll hear about it within the next half hour.”

Draco pulled you up with him as he stood up, both of you finally stretching out your limbs with groans and sighs of relief from the tension of sitting for so long.

As you peered up at him, you let your hands slide up into the platinum blond strands that looked brighter than ever under the now bright moonlight. He placed a hand over one of your wrists, a smile growing on his face as he noticed the silver band sitting warmly against your skin. He leaned forward to press his forehead against yours, letting himself stay there for a minute as he tried to revel in the last few moments of peace he was going to try and prolong for the rest of his night.

“I’ll be back soon,” he cupped your cheek with one hand, his thumb grazed delicately over your cheekbone as you leaned into his touch. “Right back with you.”

“I’ll be waiting, Malfoy,” you grin.

For the first time that night, he ducked down and pressed his lips soft against yours. The gentleness quickly dissipated into longing and fervor as he kissed you like it was the last thing he was ever going to do, seeking the closeness and union he missed so desperately. Neither of you made any move to pull apart as you melted into each other, basking completely in the feeling of being so close to one another like this again.

If it wasn’t for you worrying about his timely arrival back home before everyone, you would have allowed him to keep you like that forever. But much to your dismay, you tapped him lightly against his chest that let him know it was really time for him to leave if he wanted to keep his secret trip, secret.

You stood there sadly, watching him as he unwillingly backed away from you and whispered one more goodbye to you before he disappeared into the sky in a ghost of black smoke, the aroma of his cologne still lingering in the air and a swollen feeling against your lips that left you feeling fuzzy.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

The Malfoy Manor was staring eerily back at Draco when he finally arrived back in front of the main gate of the home. It was deathly quiet and dark, only a small light could be seen from the living room as he approached further into the property.

He swiftly ran up the steps, hand falling carefully onto the brass doorknob of the front entrance, stopping in his tracks completely when he heard a mixture of hushed angry voices.

“I told you, Bella,” he heard his mother exclaim fiercely. “He only went out to clear his head.”

“Clear his head of what?” his aunt sneered. “He’s falling weak, Cissy. He should be running around in joy that the Dark Lord has him in his inner circle.”

“My son is not weak, don’t you think this can all be a little overwhelming for someone who hasn’t even finished his schooling?” His mother defended him and he could picture the exact sneer on her face as she spoke.

“I want to know where he went,” Bellatrix says hotly, “he’s been gone too long.”

Draco ran through a list of excuses in his head, swallowing back the lump in his throat when he decided on one and put on a straight face as he turned the doorknob, cautiously stepping into the dimly lit living room where both his parents and aunt were waiting for him.

“Ah, there he is,” his father announced as he was the first one to see the boy clambering inside.

“I’m sorry I went off for so long,” Draco spoke up before anyone could ask. “I remember someone mentioning they had spotted Potter around a village nearby so I tried to go look for him.”

“Did you?” Bellatrix chastised. “And nothing?”

“Nothing,” he shrugged with a feigned annoyance.

“And you were alone?” She added with a raised eyebrow.

“Yes, all by myself.”

Narcissa gave her sister a pointed look as she walked up to Draco, hand gripping tightly onto his arm before leading him away from the surprise interrogation and towards the foot of the stairs where she stopped him hastily.

“How did it go?” She asked almost inaudibly.

“Y/N sends her regards,” he whispered, “thank you.”

He gave his mother a warm hug good night before he hurriedly bounded up the stairs, looking down towards the living room once more where Bellatrix was eyeing him carefully. He decided on giving her a curt nod before vanishing into his bedroom and letting himself fall against the shut double doors, a large exhale of relief slipping past his lips as he was now safe to freely recall the night with a dazed smile he didn’t want to let go of.

PART 6

TAGLIST:

@viirgobbyy @bluesunflowersz @dreamyvcid @goddessofgames @natt-nih @cheesecakes-randomshitz @supersouthy @rebellionsarebuiltonhopee @peter-parka @thefandomplace @angelofslytherin @karentheugly @thebirdskeeponsinging @rubbyy420 @bimyoux @lovely-valllll @angstywhore @moose-squirrel-asstiel @lordfxxker @dommiefinch @johannalauraaa @aestheticallymarauderss @mrs-isabela-malfoy @dogglefoggle @ba-responds @1tristful1

APOLOGIES IF I FORGOT ANYONEEE 🥺 BUT I REALLY HOPE EVERYONE ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER EVEN THO IT WASNT TOOO EVENTFUL ❤️❤️❤️❤️ I GOT ACTION FOR THE NEXT PIECES THO JUST WAITTTT

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alfredolover119 · 3 years

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I looooove your zukka rec lists! I recently became Avatar-obsessed, never got a chance to watch it as a kid and only just got through it all! I was wondering if you'd consider doing a specifically angst rec list? I love fluffy zukka everything, but sometimes you just gotta have your heart ripped out of your chest and put back in after being thoroughly blended.

thank you! i relate heavily to “recently became Avatar-obsessed” haha. as for the angst list, i sure can try! warning: all of these have happy endings because im a crybaby who can’t read unhappy endings. also, p much all of the fics in the completed section were featured on my other lists but this is specifically the ANGSTY ones >:^)

angsty zukka wips

first, most obviously, feels like we only go backwards by @oldpotatoe

-currently at 102k with 19/27 chapters posted; rated teen

-the amnesia fic. the amnesia fic. the amnesia fic. you know. i haven’t actually read it yet because, as previously mentioned, i’m a crybaby and am waiting for it to finish up but, from my understanding, this fic will murder you in a dark alleyway with no remorse. if u like zukka angst, you’ve probably already read this, but just in case!

An injury leaves Sokka with amnesia. His last memory is of the failed invasion, of leaving his father behind in enemy territory on the Day of Black Sun. Of hopelessness. Rage. // But then he wakes up, and the war is over. Suddenly, he must come to terms with the fact that years have passed, and that he's somehow the Southern Water Tribe Ambassador to the Fire Nation. He is also supposedly friends with banished-Prince-turned-Fire-Lord Zuko, of all people. Close friends.

Yeah, nah.

and i’ll do anything you say (if you say it with your hands) by @goldrushzukka

-currently 38k with 6/8 chapters posted; rated mature

-holy shit. holy SHIT. modern au based on the “my cat likes my fuckbuddy and i am falling in love” trope(?). maybe it’s just because of how the last chapter ended, but oh my god. this one made me cry. made me want to commit violence. when it’s not angsty as hell, it’s pretty funny, but holy shit. ao3 user nebulastucky please.

It’s supposed to be a one night stand. Pick up some guy at a bar, barely remember his name and never learn anything real about him, send him packing in the morning with a thanks for the ride and a cup of coffee to-go. That’s how it’s supposed to go. // But then it’s the best sex Sokka has ever had, and he thinks he’ll hate himself if he never gets to have it again.

Violet Blossoms and Celestial Objects by @hollypunkers

-currently 15k with 2/? posted. rated teen.

-this is the sequel to blue (an angsty, zukka rewrite of book 2-- go read it if u havent!)! !! this is a book 3 rewrite. only two chapters in and mrs hollypunkers is really abusing the miscommunication tag, as zukka writers seem to enjoy doing. im excited to see how the world and story develops with the changes to the story! you should be too!! its very good! obviously spoilers for blue lmao

Having sided with the Avatar in Ba Sing Se, Zuko not only must navigate his new relationship with Sokka but returning to the Fire Nation as a banished enemy. His own journey of self discovery and personal growth must now coexist alongside the personal struggles of every other member of the Gaang as together they blaze a treacherous path toward an unsure victory against Zuko's own father and nation.

breakable heaven by @fruitysokka

-currently 71k with 9/11 chapters posted. rated teen

-swt ambassador zuko! soon to be chief sokka! fake dating ur best friend to get out of an arranged marriage! what could go wrong!!! i also haven’t read this one ((see: i’m a crybaby who is being hurt by too many zukka wips already)), but it has been hanging out in my marked for later for months. from what i understand, this fic has: angst.

With his twenty-first birthday looming just around the corner, the Southern Water Tribe Elders have decided that Sokka, next in line to be Chief, needs to get married. Sokka does not want that, but he does need to get them off his back until he can figure his way out of it. What better way to do that than to pretend to date his best friend (and newly minted Ambassador to the Southern Water Tribe) Zuko? // Seriously, this is a foolproof plan. Maybe one of Sokka's best. Absolutely nothing can go wrong.

angsty zukka fics (completed!)

(i’ll put these in wc order)

lighthouse beam by @incorrectzukka

-7k, rated g

-a modern college au!! zuko’s inner-monologue is very angsty in this fic. typical zuko. also per usual, theyre both fucking dorks. they sort themselves out in the end, but not before The Angst. zuko is semi-deaf in this fic and also he has a bit of internalized homophobia.

Sokka’s breathtakingly beautiful and he’s smart and makes other people laugh. Zuko has a half-burnt face and a deaf ear. It’s not rocket science. // Or, Zuko falls in love with the boy in his Philosophy class.

This Isn’t My Idea of Fun by @khaleeseas

-9k, explicit

-moon spirit/nwt prince!sokka, no war to be found here! admittedly this isnt THAT angsty but like. the angst IS present. zuko is still the prince. a lovely childhood friends (though they hated each other for a minute haha) to lovers story.

If you asked Zuko, he and Azula saw far too much of Chief Hakoda of the Northern Water Tribe’s children growing up. It wasn’t until they were older, and Azula pointed out that - duh - their families were trying to set them all up, that he realized why. // He was told by his mother to be polite. These people were their friends and allies, and though their nations were as different as they came, harmony between nations was the most important thing. // It wasn’t his fault the Chief’s children were so annoying.

put your lips close to mine (as long as they don’t touch) by @celestialceci

-9k, teen

-modern au! zuko and sokka are college roommates. zuko goes to spend the summer with sokka. again,, not really that angsty but-- its there!! the detail and feeling of Home in this story make me happy. zuko is insecure as hell here too. if ur into that.

Zuko hates his home. He likes college alright, but he likes Sokka even better, his assigned roommate turned best friend. Spending the summer with Sokka will be fun, a welcome change of pace he desperately wants. It probably won't awaken anything in him... right?

the thing about dancing by anodymalion

-9k, teen

-yes. this one right here officer. it makes my heart ache. also trans sokka! which is cool. but the zuko angst in this one. hurts me. not so much relationship angst as it is zuko learning he deserves happiness angst. i’m sure u know The Type.

The first time a attendant spills Zuko’s tea and doesn’t immediately fall to her knees, begging the Fire Lord’s forgiveness, it is not anger but a resounding warmth that fills his chest.

i could (never) give you peace by @zukkababey

-10k, mature

-OUCH. OUCH OUCH OUCH. boys please learn to communicate im begging u. also zuko.. zuko, dude. as the tags of the fic say, hes “really going through it” in this one. YOUCH. post-canon.

Zuko almost said it. He almost said the words I think I’m in love with you, but he choked them back down at the last second. // Zuko would never be able to be what Sokka wanted. They might have needed each other during the summer, when two boys with too much weight on their shoulders found comfort in each other in the only way they knew how. // But now Zuko was Fire Lord, and Sokka was leaving.

this love burns so yellow (becoming orange and in its time, exploding) by @meliebee

-18k, teen, major character death

-i lied. THIS is the one, officer. found family.. good mai and zuko and toph friendships.. . ozai escapes prison and tries to overthrow zuko. OBVIOUSLY angst ensues. poor boy. he Does heal in this but it gets worse before it gets better. angst angst angst angst.

Ten months after Zuko is crowned at seventeen, he faces his first coup.

Anything for You by beersforqueers

-23k, explicit

-istg. this is probably one of my favorite zukka fics. its PAINFUL. modern au where theyre broken up but sokka hasnt told his family yet so zuko goes home with him for kataang wedding. a bit smutty, but the plot oh my god ohgm y fuvk. made me cry the first time i read it. (see: crybaby!me) insert that one picture of the horse with the caption PAIN.

In which Sokka and Zuko have broken up but Sokka hasn't told his family yet. So when Katara and Aang's wedding weekend rolls around and he doesn't want to break Gran-Gran's heart, he asks Zuko to pretend to be his boyfriend for one last weekend. // Things don't go as planned.

Moving Mountains by @thefangirlingdead

-64k, mature

-so. when i read this the first time it was in one sitting. soulmate au set within canon era / the comics, to an extent. soulmates can hear each others thoughts. i will happily say this is slowburn, jesus christ. champagne without the cham.

Soulmates are chosen by the spirits and can hear each other’s thoughts. Sokka thinks it’s cheesy and dumb. Zuko thinks it’s poetic justice that he doesn’t have one because he doesn’t deserve it. Cruel irony is finding out that the prince of the Fire Nation (and the person currently hunting you) is your soulmate.

In the Soft Light by @voidcenturyscholar and @romancedawning

-83k, teen, graphic depictions of violence

-moon spirit!sokka living in the northern water tribe. zuko is sent to the northern water tribe as a cultural liaison. iroh is the fire lord but while he is away taking care of lu ten after his injury ozai steps up. i cannot express how many emotions this fic made me feel. background yuetara. i would almost say found family?? but. anyway. plenty of angst to spare here with a healthy dose of enemies to friends to lovers.

As the newly appointed cultural liaison to Northern Water Tribe, Zuko is the first Fire Nation Citizen to step foot inside the city's walls in nearly a century. He's determined to prove himself—to the Fire Lord and to his father—even if the Water Tribe's spirit-touched prince seems to want nothing to do with him.

That Midnight Sky by @zukkababey

-103k, teen

-now now now. tms... modern college au where sokka agrees to tutor zuko in physics because zuko has to maintain straight a’s and physics is just not doing it for him. so. thats cool but THEN azula moves in, randomly, with zuko. to hide the fact that sokka is tutoring zuko, they fake date! what could go wrong!! the mutual pining in here combined with the angst... wonderful, tasty. everyone read it rn. also SLOWBURN

In Zuko’s strict family, needing a tutor is just about the worst thing you could do. Failing a class, however, is even worse. The only rational solution? Take up Aang on his offer to find him a physics tutor and have Sokka—beautiful, smart, handsome Sokka—tutor him in secret. // When Azula’s arrival threatens to reveal Zuko’s secret, it’s up to Sokka to convince her this definitely isn’t what it looks like. See, he’s actually… Zuko’s… boyfriend? // Hmm. There’s no way this could get complicated, right?

#zukka #zuko #sokka #angst #zukka angst #atla #avatar: the last airbender #fic recs #zukka fic recs

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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