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#then he just let everything else go and start laughing non stop without a single care in the world
kanene-yaaay · 2 months
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He started it!
Kanene's notes: I think my brain is no longer able to grasp what a 'quick, small fic' is kjhgfdfghjjhgvjhgf somebody this was supposed to be just a small drabble but the cuteness broke me. Somebody save me from the Dogday brain rot please somebody save me...
But anyway! Can't say when I will be able to post again, college just started and so my days are going to be very full :') Still! Hope you all like this!
Warnings: Plenty of raspberries, nibbles and teasy nicknames. Around 3,500 words. Ticklish!Dogday and Ler!Reader. Other than that, nothing, this is pure tooth-rooting fluff. Rip da boi. Also! Once again, I'm obsessed w Felix's writing style where the dialogues and narration are mingled together so all the hugs and thank you's to her :D
[~*~]
Dogday had started it.
Of course it was him. Just like a ray of sunshine, your own personal star, shining and chasing the dark shadows away, he did and now there was no other way this could’ve played out. 
“A-angel, please!” His voice glitched, getting lower at the end of his plea, however immediately growing higher again as giggles began filling the space, crackling and buzzing in both despair and delight. “Think about what you’re about to do!”
You hummed and smiled at his squeal, fond and sweet and absolutely devilishly as you remembered how this entire game began.
Every single corner of this factory was dangerous. Even so, there were hostile places where any kind of sound, whisper or even a poorly suppressed gasp could attract the worst kind of attention and immediately break in pieces the fragile peace that warily followed you and Dogday in your path. At the time, you both had been walking through one of these areas for far too long, bathed by complete silence, careful to keep your steps silent and with an alerted kind of tension clinging to your form with each passing second. 
That was when, for some reason, Dogday decided that enough was enough. It was his moment to shine.
Where even did the idea come from? Has he been bored?  
“You just seemed so stressed!” His tail was wagging so much you could feel the wind it created hitting your legs. An involuntary coo left your mouth at the playful, a tad proud glint in his eyes, which only made his smile bigger and loopier. He tried to tug his hands away to hide his face. Needless to say, it was an unsuccessful attempt. “No, no, no! Don’t!”
Anyway, it had been confusing at first. When the giant sentient toy turned in your direction, making fingerguns with his paws and pretending to be firing at something, you immediately spun around in a quick and swift movement, grabpack and firing hand ready to attack pointing in the same direction as him, eyes searching for the danger he was gesturing. 
… Stopping to think, he did almost laugh at you that moment, didn’t he? You bet that if you both didn’t have to conceal any and every sound his crackles would’ve rang free and joyfully across the whole factory. 
You took an exaggerated deep breath and blew slowly in a faux disappointment, feeling his muscles under you tense and shake with barely concealed titters, a tiny protesting half whine and half plea flying around, his torso squirming.
(Away or closer to the sensations? Both of you knew the answer very well.)
Tsk. You hummed again, only to hear that adorable squeal once more. It took everything to not let him go and dig, to listen those high pitched squeals over and over again and see how many of them you could collect, letting them dance in harmony with his glitching laughter and rumbling chuckles until happiness and joy were the only thing filling his mind and actions, until his smile were wide enough to light up the dark pathway ahead and each tiny, almost imperceptive wiggle, scribble or twitch of your fingers was followed by the lovely, lovely melody of his tickly delight, prompting more and more expectant titters and pleas without you even having to lay a single finger on him.
But the game couldn’t be over so soon. And it was quite fun to see how much giggles you could get even though you weren’t actually doing anything.
(Yet.)
So you pushed down the adoring smile that tried (again) to take over your features and let it morph into a sad expression, slowly shaking your head in a fake disappointment.
Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Such a good friend and he almost laughed at you like that… After everything you both have been through, after all the fights and the talks, the hugs and the vents… You see how that is.
“P-please! Angel, just, please!”
No. Nuh-uh. You went back to your previous position, shoving your face in that soft fur. Don’t start with the sugarily sweet nicknames. You were brooding. Moping. Sad. Devastated. Betrayed. In absolute and total pain. There was no angel available right now, please return later.
His only answer was a series of even more glitched squeaks and titters growing stronger and giddier at any second with your silliness, especially when his body involuntarily jumped, already in alert for any attack and still not doing anything to scramble away. 
That could be your fault, but in your humble opinion, it wasn’t very clear. Okay, maybe he couldn’t just bring himself to stop and stand still when you kept using every opportunity to nuzzle and mumble on his belly non stop, easily following his torso and quivering stomach around as he wiggled and squirmed in the same place, trying with all his might to not lose himself already with all the ticklish shocks that bolted across his entire midriff with such a simple action. Words (and teases) continue to fall like waves from your lips.
Maybe he just had been bitten by an awful ticklybug! Who would know?
“There is no tick-” Dogday gasped and snickered when you blew air against his fur again, freezing for a second in preparation for a raspberry that didn’t come. Realizing that, he let his head fall on the floor and trashed even more. He tugged his arms again, playfully growling when you kept your hold firm on them and wiggling even more as he turned to stare back at you, a funny kind of energy and antecipation racing each other in his nerves. “There is no ticklebug! It’s you!!”
Oh well. 
A pity.
Anyway. Back to the story. That had been how everything began. He later explained his idea for the game, when you were able to exchange words again. From that moment, in total random occasions, one of you would make a gesture in the other’s direction and they would have to quickly react to it. In the most silly and unexpected way, preferentially, as long as you didn’t make any sound while at that.
See, Dogday? No sound.
He yapped in protest, letting out a single surprised, an offended yelp at the accusation. “We don’t need to be quiet here. You’re just teasing me!” Dogday’s hands fell to his sides, no longer trying to pry you away, shoulders shaking with every giggle and eyes watching your every action with joy and expectation. 
You keep going.
The playful exchange became a habit between you two at this point, even filling the moments you didn’t exactly need to be quiet. It was a nice way to interact when there were no more words, memories or promises to be exchanged. That is why Dogday didn’t even bat an eye at you when you called his attention by innocently offering both of your hands in his direction, tail lightly wagging as he immediately placed his own paws on yours, a fun, tiny grin appearing on his previously serious and protective expression when you intertwined your fingers.
Which quickly morphed to a wide stare when you locked your grip and jumped on him, bringing both of you to the ground.
So, yeah, Dogday was the one who started it. And now he was trying to shoot his shot again, pulling out the saddest, sweetest puppy eyes in your direction. 
“Angeel, please. Mercy!”
Awww.
(That was a bit adorable, you couldn’t lie. It kind of melted your heart. Just a tiny, little bit.)
(Ok. A lot.)
But that was the thing, Dogday, you were being merciful already. Because if your hands were free, you would give him the entire special attack. You would just claw and knead on that cute, truly adorable tummy, taking some precious time to give your attention to his sides and all the scribbles and scratches to his ribs, being sure to go and tickle aaaall of his favorite, ticklish spots over and over and over again, for as long as he wanted. 
Wouldn’t that be nice? And, of course, during this your hands would be very, very busy, so he would have to keep his arms nice and snug out of the way. But he could do this for you, right? Even if he was laughing and squirming and crackling his heart out, not even pretending to not love every single moment of this game, or that he wanted it to be over any moment soon. 
“Eek! Wait, wait!” 
You grinned. See? That was what not being merciful would be. But, stopping to think, those are not bad ideas at all. He really couldn’t stop getting any more adorable, could he?
“Sweetheart!” He squeaked and shook his head, partially in a way to disperse all the restless energy taking over his body and partially in a hopeless attempt to make his big ears cover his flaming face.
Oh. 
(It was quite endearing, actually, how he didn’t exactly blush. His smile would get wobblier and the light in his eyes fuzzy and lightly trembling all while he couldn’t decided if he tried to hide his face or kept staring at you with a gaze so full of complete trust, an excited desperation conquering all his features… Honestly it was just as crystal clear as if his face got completely taken over by a strong shade of red, truly.)
Your entire demeanor softened. That nickname was a new one.
(You wouldn’t mind listening to it being giggled out like this again in the future.)
You decided to return the favor.
Yes, gigglebug?
For a piece of time, Dogday froze with wide eyes and a slight ‘bzzz’ sound escaped from his voicebox. Then his squirming grew anew, no longer being able to look at your soft gaze and trying to press his dazzling, gigantic smile on his shoulders, now with his entire body bouncing with barely suppressed snickers.
His tail hit the floor with an endless and quick pace of ‘thump thumpthumpthump’. The confusion in your expression immediately gave place to a wicked smirk.
Hm.
Gigglebug?
He jolted with a yelp.
Silly giggly gigglebug?
Dogday snorts and tries to pry his hands away from yours with a bit more energy than before. Still, his efforts were still half heartedly at best. In turn you just hold them a bit tighter, thumbs lightly rubbing the back of his paws as your tipped your head to the side, - not unlike he himself watched you from time to time - chasing his gaze and maybe or maybe not giving his belly a tiny - so quick and small that it was over in less a blink - nibble until he turned back to watch you with wide fuzzy eyes.
Nope. No hiding that beautiful smile, huh?
His ears perked a little bit and his wide eyes captured yours for a moment, then jumped to your kind hands, your amused, playful glare, his defenseless belly, his captured paws, your suspecting eyes and, eventually, your eyes again.
Then, without breaking contant, he shut his mouth, firmly pressing his lips in a tight line as he lowered his head to his shoulder, successfully hiding, indeed, that beautiful smile.
Ah.
You see how that is.
Dogdayy ~
He let out a muffled giggle, only pressing his face even more on his shoulder, turning away from you.
Well, since he was insisting so much…
You discreetly adjusted your position, took a deep breath and immediately attacked his lower belly.
His entire torso spasmed, almost throwing you out of him with the sudden move, a loud peal of laughter instantly filling the air as the horrible, awfully ticklish vibrations fuelled his trashing, the raspberry spreading across every single of his nerves, leaving each and every one of them tingling and buzzing.
Another deep breath. Another long, long raspberry and a crackling squeal was ripped from his voicebox, more and more following suit as you chased every sensitive path of fur non stop, not losing a single opportunity to shake your head to increase the sensations, giggling a bit at how that never failed to glitch his words and bring more squeaks to the lovely melody of his laughter.
You spared a couple of tiny raspberries for his sides, literally feeling how they made him arch his back. That only gave you even more access to plenty of sensitive, ticklish spots that you were more than happy to latch on and tickle as if the future safety of the entire world depended on sending him to a total madness and increasing your collection of “cute-sounds-that-Dogday-does”.
You experimentally began nibbling that spot that connected his back and side, right below his belt, if you were not mistaken this would…
Snorts took over the giant toy and in a blink his back immediately clued back on the floor, torso trying and failing in curling into a defensive ball. The new round of raspberries vibrated across his side and teased his entire ribcage, tickling each bone and nerve. 
Dogday tried to muffle his reactions on his shoulder, but with each nibble, each raspberry, tease and nuzzle he felt his mind getting more and more overpowered by the realization that it tickled. It tickled so, so, so much and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Not when his face seemed to be set aflame and his entire body kept getting closer and closer from giving up completely from his squirms and wiggles to let himself succumb to the joyful, insane, funny and fun sensation. Not when his angel kept looking at him with so much amusement and fondness that only succeeded to make him feel even more ticklish and the fact that his giggles weren’t the only ones filling the room made him feel extra silly and made his heart melt with delight. When he was able to just laugh and squeal his heart out, carefree and loud and happy.
How could anyone blame him, then, when he saw with the corner of his eyes you lift your head and so he decided to push his luck more, continuing to hide his big, gigantic, loopy smile.
Ohoho.
So, your dear gigglebug was trying to keep all those sweet reactions away from you, even after you worked so hard for every single one of them? Now, that really wasn’t fair, was it?
You gave him a break, no longer tickling him. Still, having your voice so close made his torso instinctively try to wiggle away, which in itself seemed to only re-alight all the reminiscent tingling on his skin, making the tickly sensation it go back to buzz and dance on his nerves, increasing the phantom tickles, each passing second and taunting word making them feel worse than before. All of this only kept Dogday stuck into an infinite sea of unstoppable, hysterical titters and snickers.
Do you think this is fair at all, gigglebug? 
He shook his head and stopped, then nodded and then shook it again, giving you a glimpse of shiny eyes for a second before it disappeared once more on his fur.
Well, you think this isn’t fair at all. But that is fine. You both can stay here all day long if needed, as long it takes until you get to see that beautiful blushy face and dazzling smile. Yep. That sounds like a good, no, perfect idea! He would love this, right? To keep giggling and laughing and squealing here while being tickled silly forever and ever? 
“Sweheheart!”
Oh! You wonder who said that! It sounded like your dear friend Dogday, but it couldn’t be him, right? No, not really. He was too busy hiding away from his best friend, as it seems.
Aw, that was a pity, truly. He was such a kind, awesome presence in your life. With a personality able to brighten everyone’s life and a trustful companion that was incredibly kind and strong. Always ready to help without a second thought or a blink of an eye, to give a hand, a comforting hug or a remark that would bring you straight to reality. 
Besides, he was kind of cute, too. Like a sweet, excited puppy. He had this loud, booming laughter that, when you got him laughing for long enough, started to descend into a series of crackles that never failed to make him snort and bounce around in joy until his voice box began to glitch in the most endearing and funny way. 
“No more teasing! No more!” Dogday’s titters grew to hysterical high pitched giggles and he scrunched up his neck, trying to best to curl up and disappear as more and more heat spread across his face. His tail would make a hole into the factory’s ground at this rate.
See? It was the most adorably adorable thing, honestly. 
Actually…
You adjusted yourself again and his bubbly giggles developed to chuckles, paws tugging from your grip once again. He knew very well what that tune of yours meant.
You kind of missed listening to his laughter…
And so, with a swift move you freed your hands, fastly shoving them on Dogday’s armpits before he could even react. 
Without wasting a single second, you digged.
A shriek took over every other sound in the place. And then other as you pushed your face right in the middle of his tummy, nibbling and pressing raspberries on it without mercy all while your fingers scratched, scribbled and drummed on his pits with no abandon, nimble fingers dancing on the spot for a few minutes before jumping to other one, to prevent him to get used to the sensation.
Dogday just fell limply on the floor, his shoulders, torso and belly shook with the force of his laughter, and his arms kept jumping from hiding his face to cluing on his sides in a futile attempt to stop the wiggling from worming their way, once more, to his ribs or neck. Each snort, squeal, yelp, snicker, crackle and every other sound swirled freely in the air, especially when a raspberry found a new sensitive spot that even he didn’t know about - since when his collarbone was so ticklish? - and focused all their attention there until all his cute and fun reactions slowed to a string of bubbly, hysterical giggles and his friend went on the look for another sweet tickle spot.
His neck, ribs, armpits, stomach, even his own ears had not been safe from the playful attack. A few pieces of time passed until it slowed to an incredible, horrible kind of soft tickling that led to a series of tittering sniggers to spill from his lips and to a beginning of tears to gather in the corner of his eyes.
At this point, his paws came and gently rested on your hands, engulfing them completely, glimmering eyes finding yours as the light scribbling instinctively squirm lazily from one side to other.
You stopped, entire form melting, the playful smirk plastered on your features losing the sharpness of its corners as a proud fondness took over. You freed one hand to caress the fur of his head, chuckling with drops of amusement and care when he closed his eyes and all his muscles relaxed completely at that, his tail now going back and forth in a tired but content wag. He nuzzled your hand. 
There is it. My beautiful smile.
He groaned, pulling his ears until they covered his face. “Angel… You’re ruthless.”
Hey, it’s not teasing if it’s true!
Another groan. He muttered something under his breath but didn’t shy away from your touch.
The silence fell like a soft blanket on you, bringing to that dark, horrible place a feeling of safety and care that used to be just a pointless, futile dream, before.
(This was nice. Safe.)
Suddenly, two paws flew like a blur of movement in your direction and you felt your entire world tumble and turn upside down. 
You blinked and as your eyes focused, only to find a giant sentient toy who resembled a dog and slowly became your trustful companionship on the last days (hours?) in this factory. Someone you knew that would be right by your side and fight for your safety almost as much as you fought for his.
Although, by the way his mischievous gaze found yours and big arms embraced you in a firm, but still gentle, hug, you must admit you weren’t feeling that safe anymore.
…Dogday?
“No. You’re in friend hug jail. Paying for your friend crimes. You can’t get out.”
You snorted. Glad that you had the sense to start that playful game in the safe area you and Dogday had been clearing and taking care for some time since the ‘You Got To Be a Human and Rest’ episode.
Getting comfortable, you let out a relaxed sigh, snuggling closer, letting your hand softly run on his back in a soft, nice rhythm, not taking too long to feel him melting under the caring touch. 
Well, you may be in jail, but your consciousness was clear.
Dogday had started it.
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iamthat-iam · 2 months
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"Ego", The Final Boss
Olivia (she prefers to be called Liv) has been on quite the spiritual journey for a couple of years. She was born and raised Catholic, then as a teen she decided to leave the church because it didn't resonate with her. She went through a law of attraction phase, followed by law of assumption, and finally, she found non dualism from a few Twitter and Tumblr accounts.
The message, from what she gathered, was that she needed to fully drop the ego in order to realize her true self/true nature and to experience whatever she wanted. She even read a few books where realized masters have spoken about their own personal journeys of dropping ego and how life is generally more peaceful for them now that they've done so.
Now, Liv is one with a troubled past. She would give anything to become an entirely different person with no childhood trauma, and just a happy life all around. She meditated every single day, practiced "sitting in silence", and tried her hardest to detach from her "ego."
She stopped enjoying her usual hobbies out of fear of identifying too much with the character. She would go out of her way to correct thoughts that she felt were "too related to being the person." Needless to say, her mental health began to go downhill very fast.
One of her best friends, Marcus, decided to check up on her one day through face-time. "Hey sis! How have you been?! Haven't seen you in a while."
"Hey..." Liv answered. "I'm not doing all that great to be honest."
"Yeah I figured that. That's why I reached out to you," Marcus stated. "I'm worried about you. It seems like you barely leave the house. Everytime myself or anyone else tries to make plans with you, you either cancel last minute or come up with some bogus excuse as to why you can't come out."
Liv had to laugh because everything he said was true. "So I'm guessing you didn't believe the story about my pet rabbit dying."
Marcus cackled. "GIRL. I've known you for years and not once have you ever had a pet rabbit. Stop playing."
"Okay let me tell you what's really going on with me," Liv began, "So a few months ago I found this 'spiritual practice' called Non Dualism, and the premise of it is you need to 'let go of ego' in order to realize your true nature as God, or Awareness, whatever you want to call it. Also you get to experience whatever you want."
"So this is the reason why you've stopped enjoying your usual hobbies, and why you've stopped having a social life?" Marcus inquired. "I'm going to be honest here. As your friend, I feel like I owe it to you to tell you the Truth even if it isn't what you want to hear. I don't think that this 'practice' has helped you one bit. Either you have misinterpreted the message, or these people are spreading misinformation. Never at any point should you sacrifice your mental health for the sake of 'becoming enlightened.'"
"I don't know what else to do," Liv started to cry a little. "I just want to become a different person living a life full of happiness, one without trauma and constant reminders of my horrible past. I hate being this broken person!"
"It's okay hun, I totally understand," Marcus consoled her. "I can help you. You remember my family guru right? She hates being called that, but I don't know how else to refer to her. Her name is Sage. My family has gone to her for spiritual advice and healing for years."
"Yes, I remember her! Didn't she help your mom heal her lower back pain?" Liv asked excitedly.
"She sure did. I can give you her number if you want!"
After Liv ended her face-time call with Marcus, he gave her Sage's number. She immediately reached out to her to schedule a day where they can meet up.
- -
One day, Liv arrived at a beautiful park to discover Sage already sitting on one of the benches waiting. "Hi! I don't know if you remember me, I'm Marcus' friend Liv."
"Yes! Hi Liv, it's nice to see you again," Sage reached out and gave Liv a warm hug. "Now what can I help you with?"
Liv sat down next to Sage. "Well, I discovered Non dualism a few months ago, and I'm not sure if I misunderstood the message or not, but I thought you had to let go of ego in order to realize your true nature as awareness. And after you realize this, you can experience whatever you want. So long story short, I stopped enjoying life because I thought I had to do that in order to be enlightened."
Sage hesitated for a moment, and then smiled. "Think about it this way.. if it's true that our true nature is awareness, or God, whatever label you put on it, why would you have to go through these unnecessary steps in order to 'become' it? If that's what you already are in the first place?"
Liv opened her mouth to reply, then closed it again. Maybe Sage had a point.
"Here are my thoughts. If anyone is telling you to 'drop the ego', it's bullshit," Sage chuckled. "The point of Non Dualism is realizing that you were always awareness. You were always the awareness behind everything that seems to appear. The ever-stretching, limitless silence that can take on the form of anything. The ego is just a thought. The idea that you are not already fully realized is also just a thought. In reality, there's no ego or person here to let go of. No person here who needs to become 'fully realized.' Just drop the idea that you are a limited human that has to become something, and you'll be golden."
Liv's jaw dropped to the ground. "You're telling me it was THAT SIMPLE THIS ENTIRE TIME?"
Sage laughed heartily. "Yes it is. Why do you think it took masters like Lester or Sri Nisgardatta months or YEARS to 'realize Self?' because they spent so much time trying to get rid of an ego that doesn't exist!"
Liv let out a sigh of relief. "So there really is nothing to do. I can't believe I exerted all that effort for nothing. I do have one more question, how can I experience whatever I want knowing I'm awareness? I want to be a completely different person with a different past."
"The person you think you are now, and the one you want to be are both illusions. You, as awareness, can 'choose' either one like a costume. Everytime you think about this ideal version of you, you've already experienced it," Sage grinned.
Suddenly a wave of emotions flooded through Liv, a mixture of relief and happiness. She felt the urge to give Sage a tight hug. "Thank you so much for helping me today."
"You're so welcome, sweetie."
Good for Liv, she has finally accepted her omnipotence and freedom to experience anything!
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gh0st-t0wn3 · 8 months
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Lmk ss edits + headcanons, Part 4 (Jin & Yin, Ao Lie, Tripitaka, Bai He)
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- He/Him, He/They
- Pansexual, Bisexual
- They both have chronic separation anxiety, its why they're never apart; Yin tends to go non-verbal and more withdrawn without Jin, and Jin gets really agressive and paranoid without Yin. 
-  Yin can't sleep if he has nerves, Jin can do nothing BUT sleep if he has nerves
- Jin always forgets something at home, Yin reminded him a hundred times before they left
- Yin doodles on the corner of their blueprint papers whenever they're making something new, Jin cuts them out later and glues them into a sketchbook so they don't get lost
- Jin's hips are constantly covered in bruises because he's always bumping into shit (has NO spacial awareness whatsoever)
- Yin listens to rock music, Jin doesn't have a specific genre
- Somehow are simultaneously the most innocent and dirty minded people, you'll never know what you're gonna get at any given moment
- Yin always finds a way to drown in inch deep water (really bad at swimming)
- ^^^Jin laughs at him
- After they found out Mei and MK didn't like eachother as anything more than friends, they tried to trap him in the calabash again but used Redson to try and seduce him instead, MK immediately knew it was them
- Jin was talking really fast cause he was panicking once and called the Demon accountant "Semon accountant" and has still not recovered
- Yin laughed his ass off when it happened and constantly reminds him of it
- Jin likes his pillow warm (he's insane)
- They both occasionally become self aware and wind up having a weird crisis trying to figure out whether their horns are a part of their skull or something else
- Both are cat people, they're terrified of dogs, being trapped in a room with one is one of their worst nightmares
- Neither of them has clean hair, it is a fucking rock you will not be able to comb that shit out
- Jin rants about new ideas, Yin writes/draws them down
- Yin will bite you if you get near him while he's eating, bro's feral
- Jin stubs his toe atleast three times a day and screams in agony every. Single. Time. Eventually Yin just stopped running to check on him, it's happened so many times that he can distinguish what Jin's scream sounds like specifically when he stubs his toe
- Yin spent several months slowly moving everything in their house slightly to the right everyday, Jin cried cause he thought he was going insane
- Jin smells like cinnamon, Yin smells like caramel (I'm delusional, they both reek)
- Jin's love language is words of affirmation, Yin's love language is quality time
- Yin is terrified of cockroaches, Jin keeps some as pets
- Jin tried to dox Mei during one of her streams, Mei showed up at their house instead, it was terrifying
- The Demon accountant has to use a pressure hose to wash them
- They were banned from the arcade but they kept showing up begging to be unbanned, the staff eventually started feeling bad and let them back in
- Yin always throws out his drawings if they don't turn out how he wanted them to, Jin fishes them out of the trash when Yin isn't looking and keeps them in a sketchbook under his bed
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- He/Him
- ??? Bisexual, probably
- Favourite animal is a leaf slug, it just feels right
- Mei's number one supporter
- Ate a strawberry once and found a worm inside, never ate strawberries again
- Constantly bothered Zhu Bajie during their Journey to the west, he thought it was funny seeing him get upset
- "I swear to buddha, if you ask me 'why' one more time" " Why?"
- Wukong pulled a bug out of his hair once and he freaked out and made Tripitaka go through his hair for him
- Heaviest sleeper of the group, when he falls asleep he is OUT,
- Has horrible bed head and his hair takes forever to comb out
- Really bad at math
- Wakes Tripitaka up in the middle of the night to ask the dumbest questions
- Refuses to wear shoes, he's in his horse form for most of their Journey anyway so he doesn't see the point in having any at all
- Would absolutely down a container of melatonin gummies if he had the opportunity
- Had to comfort Wukong while he puked after chugging a gallon of salt water once
- Mei gets her ':3' face from him
- Trips over his hair as much as his sleeves, no matter how much of his hair he ties up somehow it always ends up in his face or under his foot and he's down
- Follow up on the last headcanon, he's tried to cut his hair before to stop this from happening, it did not work, his hair grew back really fast
- He's like a cat, if you tell him not to push something over, he'll push it over
- Favourite colour is actually rose gold, but green is a very close second
- DBK let him hold Redson after the Samadhi removal ritual was over and Ao Lie immediately dropped him (DBK caught him before he hit the ground, but Ao Lie was banned from holding him again)
- Can eat an entire buffet and not gain a single pound
- Smells like Mint
- Love language is physical touch
- Chews on his sleeves when he's bored
- Gets along surprisingly well with Nezha despite Nezha's and Ao Bing's history
- Really good at singing
- Since he's a water Demon, he gets overheated really easily in the sun so whenever they come across any kind of water (river, pond, puddle, etc) he'll just flop sideways and lay there for like 20 minutes to cool down
- Actually thought Mei was his sister for a minute until he realized it wasn't her when they first met
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- He/Him
- AroAce
- Sometimes gets visons and dreams of his life as the Golden Cicada
- Tripitaka, Zhu Bajie and Sha Wujin can see what their descendants/reincarnations are up to
- He cried on Freenoodles wedding day... it was not of joy, Zhu Bajie also threw up several times
- Once joked about having to shave all of Wukongs fur off now that he's a Monk and Wukong cried
- Absolutely HATES when people enter a room before knocking
- Would probably be scared of popping candy if he ever heard them (bubblegum, pop rocks, etc)
- Hates when people fold the corner of a page as a bookmark
- Constantly corrects people's spelling; "it's 'you're' not 'your' "
- Can't stand the sound of people chewing with their mouths open
- Has naturally long lashes
- Weak ass ankles
- Tried to teach Wukong how to read and gave up in a few hours because he refused to pay attention
- Cries whenever someone brings up his and Zhu Bajie's pregnancy, it's what keeps him up at 3am (if you haven't read JTTW, I'm sorry that this is how you found out)
- Surprisingly has a really good singing voice
- Always writes in cursive and no one can read it
- Understands cicadas
- In JTTW (chapter 39, i think) Tripitaka encountered a demon who impersonated him so well that even with his golden vision Wukong couldn't tell them apart and mistakingly attacked the real one, Tripitaka still gets nightmares about Wukong almost killing him
- Favourite colour is yellow
- Smells like oranges
- Love language is words of affirmation
- Has little freckles
- Extremely texture picky
- Vegetarian
- Has almost lost his hat (???) multiple times due to being kidnapped so often, it's a miracle he hasn't lost it yet
- Loves watching the sunset
- VERY light sleeper
- Smiled at Redson once, who immediately burst into tears (He could see that Tripitaka was the golden cicada and got scared), Tripitaka freaked out and also started crying while trying to calm him down
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- She/Her
- Ally
- Has stretch marks as a result of her bones and skin being stretched out while she was possessed by the Lady Bone Demon
- White streaks in her hair from the possession
- Even after being freed from the Lady Bone Demon, her skin was never quite right, always too pale or too cold, with little snowflake markings here and there just barely visible
- Always cold, she has to wear multiple layers of clothing to help deal with it, doesn't matter how hot it is outside, she's always wearing something warm
- Has eyebags because she gets recurring nightmares about the Lady Bone Demon and hardly gets any sleep anymore
- Has very faint freckles
- Definitely believes/believed in those "spells to turn you into a mermaid/fairy/vampire" YouTube videos
- Made potions as a kid (it's windex, food dye, and glitter mixed together)
- Probably collects rocks
- Mei and Macaque taught her how to scam other kids in roblox
- Used to believe that if you ate a seed it'd grow in your stomach and had a meltdown when she accidentally swallowed watermelon seeds
- "Guys, stop swearing!" Whenever someone says "Frick", "Heck", "Dang"
- Cut her own hair once when she was really little, it was a disaster
- Eats whatever anyone gives her
- LOVES kumara
- Always eats lucky charms for breakfast but she'll pick out all the actual cereal so she just has milk and marshmallows
- Her dad is Pigsy's boar rival from across the street
- Loves street food, especially tanghulu and cheese tea
- Chews on her sleeves
- Smells like vanilla
- Love language is quality time
- OBSESSED with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and watches it on repeat (she once compared MK to Donnie because they both fight with staffs)
- Has a charm bracelet with personalized charms she made for everyone she likes/loves
- Loves orbeez and has a heart shaped orbeez lamp that she uses as a night light (I had one as a kid, it was awesome and I miss it very much)
- Dyes the white streaks in her hair pink, but they fade pretty quick so they have to be re-dyed frequently
- Has a tooth gap
- Her favourite flowers are chrysanthemums
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auspicioustidings · 6 months
Text
Make your own way home
Word Count: 850
SPOILERS for MWIII BELOW THE CUT!
Summary: Short little drabble of what happens a few weeks after that ending cut scene.
CW: Dubcon/non-con by virtue of spirit possession.
If there was ever an example of wrong place, wrong time, you think you were it. The trip alone to the Highlands was supposed to be a journey of self-discovery. It was supposed to calm your mind, let you meditate in nature and find some peace. Not be in your head so much.
And now here you were, in your head. Stuck in your head. 
You hadn’t ever really given much thought to whether you believed in ghosts or not. You thought of them as something from horror films, always creeping in the dark and spooking young couples in their new house. You had never considered that they could be out in the hills during the daylight, waiting for a warm body to commandeer. 
And he had commandeered you without too much of a fight. For a few hours you had wrestled him for control, but his will was overpowering. It didn’t help that whoever had rudely put themselves in the driver's seat was an arse.
Let me out
“Cannae dae that, got places to be.” 
It’s my body!
“Our body hen.”
No, absolutely not, this is not a communist body, this is single ownership
“In that case, it’s my body” he laughed, seemingly finding your screaming in your (his?) head amusing.
It is NOT
“Let me see if I have a pretty wee body tae match my pretty wee voice.”
You could only watch as he took your body to the lakeside and peered into the glassy surface. It was bizarre, watching your own face light up in a grin that looked nothing like yours. He seemed pleased with what he was looking at, and you thought if you were in control you might have blushed. In fact, you knew that to be the case seeing a dusting of colour appear. Interesting, your body at least still reacted to your emotions. 
“Fuck me, look at this,” he all but purred, a hand coming to squeeze at your chest.
Oh, oh it wasn’t just your emotions that your body still reacted to. You felt the touch as if it was someone else’s hand on you and you certainly felt the sick little bolt of pleasure from it. The little bit of excitement of how horribly wrong this was. 
“Dinnae tempt me hen, told ye we have places to be. Once we get there we can play together as long as ye want.”
You could not think of a single thing to say to that and you almost felt a sense of motion sickness when your body started moving again, trekking through the mountains at a pace you would never go at. You tried everything. You pictured a battering ram to try and smash through to get control and he responded by putting thoughts in your shared headspace of the ramming turning lewd. You sang obnoxiously and he only joined in using your voice, delighted with how it sounded. You gave him the silent treatment and got so painfully bored of it that within 30 minutes you were back to just wailing in your head. 
“Ye know, they dinnae usually stay.”
What do you mean?
“When we take a body, the previous tenant disnae usually stick around.”
Am I going to die?
“Naw if ye dinnae want that. Even if ye did, might keep ye around. If ye behave might even let ye have control for a wee bit, would ye like that?”
If being possessed was not terrifying enough, the concept that the thing possessing you one, had plenty of experience and two, had never had anyone survive was making you feel sick. You felt that feeling in your body and he felt it too if his confused little grunt was anything to go by.
“Come on hen, be nice,” he said, not stopping but shoving a hand unceremoniously into your pants to rub gently. “Just relax.”
It was an insane feeling, you touching yourself but it actually being someone else controlling the movements. He wasn’t going fast, the languid pace seemingly aiming to soothe more than anything. It was wild that it sort of worked, that sick feeling fading out to a hazy rolling pleasure that was only just a gentle simmer.
At some point you felt your thoughts drift off to a strange sleep even though your body was still awake and moving. When you felt consciousness leak back in, you could see yourself approaching a house. 
“Look who's finally awake! Good timing princess” he said. You could hear the exhaustion in your voice, you wondered if he had let himself and the body sleep at all. Maybe if the body slept, you could wrestle back control.
You watched as your hand came to knock at the door. Watched it open to reveal a huge man in a skull balaclava. Watched and very much felt when your body launched at him, pushing the mask up to get your lips on his. He reacted as if he knew you, holding your body tight and laughing into your lips.
“Knew you’d make your own way home.”
“Always do LT.”
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hockeyboysimagines · 1 year
Note
Hi! Could I request the prompt 7 from the romance list, about calling when you arrive at home. After a date and some kissing when Nolan drops you home, you tell him to call once he arrives and he gets all blushy and cute because no one had told him that after a date. Super cute?!? I just need Nolan trying to be all serious and deadpan but his so breaking him a little bit and getting cute reactions.
Love this! Thanks for requesting🤍
The date had been great.
Wine, food, a nice walk through town, and pleasant conversation, which was a surprise in itself. You’d never really heard Nolan speak in a complete sentence until recently, and you were surprised at how well spoken he actually was.
You didn’t even really know him that well. You were mutual friends of mutual friends who ran in the same social circle, but you’d only ever had a handful of short conversations. And then a random chance encounter just two weeks ago had brought you together.
You’d been on the side of the road for almost 30 minutes, waiting for your car to stop smoking. A handful of cars had driven right past, even after seeing you standing in front of it, hood popped as black smoke poured out from underneath it, and still opted not to stop.
Stranded in a no service area, with a dead car had your anxiety through the roof, when you heard an approaching car start to slow, and the crunch the gravel behind your car as it came to a stop.
As you peered around the side, Nolan stepped out, and then smiled a little.
“Hi. Y/N right?” He asked as he approached.
You smiled “Yes. And your Nolan.”
He nodded before he turned to look at your car “So I’m assuming your having some car trouble here.”
You laughed a little “What gave it away?”
“I’m just good like that. Let me take a look here.” He side stepped you, arm brushing your own and leaned into engine bay. After a few moments her turned and looked at you awkwardly.
“I actually don’t know anything about cars, so I can’t help you. But what I can do is give you a ride wherever it was you were going.” He jingled his keys and stood waiting for you to answer.
“Could you? That would be great. I was just heading home.”
“No problem.”
You closed your hood, grabbed anything important from your car and locked it
before you heaved yourself inside Nolan’s Jeep and buckled your seatbelt.
“Do you need to call someone to get your car or-?”
“Yeah I figured I’d just have it towed or something. Thanks again by the way, who knows how long I’d be stuck there if you hadn’t stopped. Glad you didn’t think I was a serial killer or something.”
Nolan was quiet before he glanced over very slowly “That’s silly. The odds of two serial killers being in the same car are slim to none.”
You stared at each other for a long time before you both burst out laughing.
“Kidding of course.” He said chuckling “But I’m sure someone would have stopped. A pretty girl on the side of the road?”
You were about to respond when the word registered in your brain.
Pretty.
“You think I’m pretty?”
“Everyone does.”
“They do not-“
“Yes they do. Every single person we know. Trust me.”
You didn’t say anything for a few minutes before you spoke again “You know I think this is the first time we’ve actually really talked you and I?”
“It is. It’s nice. Not the most outgoing guy in the world, but I always wanted to talk to you.”
“Why didn’t you?” You asked turning to him. You had always known he was attractive but now that you really looked at him, you understood why girls threw themselves at him.
“I don’t know. Our friends would never let us live it down, and I’ve never seen you without them around so…”
“True. Well I’m glad we got to have our first real conversation.”
And that was it. You’d exchanged numbers, and an awkward goodbye. You were internally squealing when he texted you the first time, and from that point forward you talked non stop. About everything. Hockey, family, friends, life, dreams, goals all of it. You got to see the real Nolan. Not just the Nolan everyone else saw, he was in there too, but the real Nolan was something special.
After two weeks, he finally asked you the question you’d been dying to hear.
So I’ve been thinking.
That’s a dangerous pastime Nolan.
Ha ha. I was going to say we should go out, but if your going to be rude like that.
Go out? Like a date?
Three dots appeared and then disappeared several times as you waited holding your breath. Buy the time he finally answered you, your face was turning blue and your lungs had practically shriveled.
Sure. If you wanna call it a date.
Because no one was home, you let out a high pitched screech of excitement, propelling yourself backwards on to your bed, and kicked your feet several times.
And it was great.
The only bad part was it was winding down. You were about 10 minutes from home and you were feeling sad that it was over.
When Nolan walked you to the door, you turned to him.
“I had a nice time.”
“Eh it was okay.”
Your jaw dropped and he started laughing “I’m kidding, I had a great time with you tonight. Do you wanna maybe do it again sometime soon?”
“Hmmmmm.” You tipped your head back and looked at the night sky “I think that would be okay.”
“So if I wanted to kiss you, would that be okay?”
Your heart lept so hard into your so hard you were afraid it was going to fly out of your mouth and you’d die right there before he even got the chance. You swallowed thickly before you nodded.
He took a large step forward, large hands coming to rest on either side of your face. You never wanted to kiss anyone again after that. It was sweet and slow, but also heavy and while you could barely breathe because he was drowning you with his lips you never ever wanted him to stop. You backed up so he had you up against the side of your porch, hands everywhere.
Nolan wanted you so bad, and while it would have been simple to let it carry into your house and up to your room, he finally pulled away from you. His cheeks were fire red, but he had a smile on his face.
“Now that was more than okay.”
He stepped forward again, leaning down to give you another very short one before he took a step back and gave you a smile.
“Goodnight Y/N.”
“Goodnight Nolan.”
As he walked down your front walk you called to him “Call me when you get home, so I know you’re safe.”
He stopped and turned “What?”
“I said, call me when you get home, so I know you made it safely.”
“Your worried…about me making it home safe?” He looked both confused and flattered, mouth hanging open.
“Of course. Should I not be?”
“No one-no one’s ever said that to me.”
“Well I am. I wouldn’t want you to you know…pick up a serial killer or something.”
Nolan chuckled, eyes sparkling as he turned and walked to his car, knowing for sure that later that evening, he would be dreaming of you.
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annazima · 2 years
Text
Probability Theory J2
Just romantic nonsense and a little math
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My nephew Peter is 13 and he loves math. His latest hobby is probability theory. When Peter is really interested in something, he starts talking nonstop about the object of his passion. So I learned a lot of unnecessary information about the probability theory of random events. In general terms, of course. I couldn't say that I listened attentively, but I realized that Peter was most interested in his chances of winning the lottery. When this issue was studied from all sides, Peter wanted to apply his new skills in something else.
"Do you want me to count something for you? Any random event" - Peter looks at me hopefully. It seems that if I don't support this game, Peter will die of boredom.
Okay. Well, for example. What is the probability that there will be Inbelivable chemistry between the two actors of the show?
"It's too easy," Peter wrinkles his forehead. "A single random event. Either it will happen, or it won't happen. It turns out to be one chance out of two or 50%."
Okay, good. And what is the probability that the two leading actors of the show will become really good friends?
"There are several options here. They can become friends, they can just be colleagues..." Peter continues to mutter something and gives out - "I think we get a 25% probability."
Let's move on. What are the chances that two actors who come from Texas will be chosen for the main roles in the show?
"Ooo" - Peter begins to like the game. He looks at the calculator. "It turns out only 2%, small chances," the nephew comments.
And what are the chances that the show will last 15 years?
"That long?" - Peter is surprised. He's only 13, so, yes, 15 years is a long time. "Are there shows that lasted longer? Peter asks.
No. In its genre, it is the longest running show on television.
"Okay" - Peter turns to the calculator. "Then there is a probability of 7%." Peter begins to realize that all these facts are relevant to specific real people. "Good. Are there any other interesting things about these two actors?" Peter winks.
What about the fact that they're both middle children? They both have an older brother and a younger sister.
"Really?" Peter smiles. "I like it. But we'll break it down into two events..." - Peter starts babbling again and plunges into calculations. The answer is ready in a few minutes. "The probability of this event is about 0.4%."
Okay, I'm going all in. And what is the probability that ALL these random events will occur.
"Which ones? And the chemistry between the actors, and the fact that they are friends, and that the show will last 15 years and everything else?" Peter clarifies. "This is interesting" - the nephew leans over the calculator again. I have time to pour lemonade and reheat the pizza when Peter finishes the calculations.
"It turns out the probability is 0.0003%" - Peter looks pleased.
And what does that mean?
"Well, you know that this is mathematics and this is the calculation of absolute probability. This means that the result is not 100% guaranteed and we took approximate data not based on statistics..." - Peter starts muttering again.
Stop. I just want to know what it means.
"Well," Peter's eyes shine - "This is the ONE CHANCE IN A MILLION, it's easier to win the lottery" - he laughs.
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I like how random things intertwine and become completely non-random. I see how different events come together, as if multicolored pieces of a mosaic are put together into a single intricate ornament.
There is nothing accidental in this chain of events, there is nothing superfluous. Everything matches - one piece of the puzzle to another. And it turns out a rare thing, the only one of its kind. This is the one chance in a million.
That's why the story of J2 fascinates me. And it's so magical, and there is no doubt that it was not without the intervention of higher forces.
As if this is not real life, but the stupidest milodrama. It's like Chuck came up with all this in a fit of crazy inspiration. And I even picked up the names 'Jared' and 'Jensen', specifically so that it would be easier for fans to combine two names into one "J", as if these two really are one.
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fallinfl0wers · 3 years
Note
hellooo! this is the first time i request something from a blog :D could i request headcanons of diluc, scara, kazuha and xiao when their s/o tells them they're pregnant and possibly how they'd get used to having a kid? tyy! dont forget to take breaks and relax!
Literally baby-sized trouble.
summary: you're pregnant! how does he react to the news and how do the get used to your child? includes: diluc (26 bullet points), scaramouche (24 bullet points), kazuha (17 bullet points) and xiao (35 bullet points) warnings: fem!reader, pregnancy, children, non-explicit/non described giving birth, mostly fluff with a little bit of hurt/comfort and angst. format: headcanons thank you for your request!! this was so fun to write! >< imagining the characters being soft with children is just so cute :") i specially like these four a lot >< when i wrote this i was in a xiao mood if it wasn't obvious that his turned out longer than everyone else's lol, and it's also the first time i write for kazuha so it was shorter than the others, but i think his is the sweetest ><! i hope you enjoy it! ps. the names and meanings- i got them from google, feel free to correct me if there's anything wrong with them ><
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Diluc
He's going to stop functioning the moment he hears the news from you.
Literally, he's still as a rock and completely taken by surprise.
He... can't say he'd never wanted children. He's pretty traditional and, since he has this beautiful relationship with you, he assumed it might happen sometime in the future.
But oops guess it will have to happen in the close future, since you're already pregnant.
After staring at you with widened eyes for a while, he speaks up: "...is... is it true?" You hold his hands on yours with a smile on your face, nodding. "Yes, Diluc. We're going to be parents." Hearing your words, he starts to tear up as he hugs you, his touch almost hesitant, as if you were so fragile he could break you if he wasn't careful. "...thank you." He'd whisper between silent tears, hiding his face from your sight.
Very supportive and very protective!
You will have the most comfortable of pregnancies. He will make sure you don't need to move a single muscle to get anything you want.
If the two of you aren't married or engaged yet, he's going to propose to you very soon, keep that in mind ><
He starts reading every book he can find on pregnancies and babies so that he knows what to do to help you when you give birth and how to take care of his child once they're born ><
You have to convince him that yes, you can go and eat in the dining room and you don't need to eat everything in your room or stay in bed all day and yes, you can still do most things and no, he doesn't have to worry so much.
But yeah, in later stages of your pregnancy he gets more overprotective because he doesn't want anything to hurt you or your baby :(
He couldn't be calm enough while you gave birth and had to wait outside of the room, which only made him more nervous </3
But when he finally held your little baby on his arms for the first time, he broke down crying.
You two had a boy! He looked a lot like him, too... with the red hair and eyes... so cute...
He's not sure of what to name him, he'd thought of some names before, but they all disappeared when he saw the little bundle of joy in his arms;;
So you two will have to think about a name again!
In the end, you settle for Felix; name meaning "happy" or "lucky"!
Diluc is a very busy man, but he still does his best to be there for you and his son as much as possible!
He's also not very sure as to how he should interact with him...
But he does know he LOVES playing with him as soon as he starts to understand how to play with his toys.
But... there are not so cute parts about having a kid, after all.
At times, he worries whether or not he'll be able to be there enough for him.
He wonders if he can be a good father, given how awkward he is with his emotions.
What if when Felix grows up he starts hating him for being absent? He wouldn't be able to stand it.
You always reassure him as you both put the baby to sleep on his crib.
All Diluc wants is for his son to have a happy childhood and a loving family, but worries he won't be good enough of a father.
However, when Felix's first word is "'iluc!" as he stretches out his tiny arms towards him, he thinks that maybe, just maybe, he can do this right.
Scaramouche
He thought you were joking, so he laughed.
When you didn't laugh along with him and was met with your blank face, he understood you were serious.
He never even thought he'd be with anyone in a relationship before you came along, let alone have a child with anyone... So he's obviously very shocked and confused as to how to proceed.
After an awkward moment of staring at each other, he cleared his throat and crossed his arms, looking at you with an equally blank face. "So? What do you want me to do about it?" "H-huh?" "In the sense of- what do you want to do? Keep it or not." You huffed, and when he heard your determinated answer, he sighed and gave your head some soft pats. "Alright, alright, whatever you want, I guess."
Okay listen here- it's not like doesn't care but it isn't like he cares so much either...
This man would do anything for you, really, and that's what happens.
He does anything and everything for you, because he's worried about you and not necessarily about the baby you're carrying.
It's not like he hates children- because you can't hate anything you don't perceive as equal or superior to you and a baby ceirtainly isn't either for him-
It's more like he doesn't know what to do with them because he's never been around children enough to understand them.
He's overall very indifferent towards the child ngl.
Then he sees you cradling your baby -a girl- in your arms and his mind just... goes blank. Huh, so that's what a human looks like right after being born.
Your little daughter looks more like him than she looks like you, sorry. But he can clearly see on her face some factions that will look like yours as she grows up.
But...
"Now what?"
He'll help you look after her however he can, since he doesn't want you to be too tired because he never knows when he'll have to leave for weeks or even months without notice.
He's not entirely cold or indifferent towards her, even if sometimes he might resent her a bit for taking away some of your attention.
But like when you were choosing a name for her, he gave a few suggestions and in the end you choose one of the names he thought of!
Her name is Hikari, name meaning "light"!
Due to the nature of his job, he doesn't want to be seen around either of you at the moment in public. It would only put a target on your backs.
And it takes a long, long while for him to warm up to her.
It disheartens you a little, but when you see him looking down at Hikari's sleeping form on the crib, softly poking her cheek with a strangely child-like curiosity on his eyes, you feel at ease.
And he thinks that he can probably handle this parenting thing better than he ever expected. Maybe it's not that bad, after all.
Ceirtainly, he thinks, as he holds her in his arms one day after she spoke her first word to him, this parenting thing is not really that bad.
(Her first word was "papa!")
Be ready, because once he gets attached to your daughter he won't stop spoiling her!
Kazuha
"Are you sure, love?" "Yes, I'm sure. We're having a child!" A smile painted itself on his face as he leaned in to kiss your forehead. "I hope I can be a good father for them."
So the Kaedehara family is getting a new member, huh!
Not that there's much left to his name, especially now that he's a fugitive... but he's excited nonetheless!
Although he's not one to settle down for long, he will make an effort for both you and the child, since it's not good for someone who's pregnant to wander around.
He's very protective, but not in an overbearing way! He simply wants you to take it easy and relax, he can take care of everything else on his own!
That being said, he's not rich like Diluc or Scaramouche, so he's also going to work harder than ever to get everything you or the baby need in advance so that neither of you have to stress out!
He's the one who takes it better out of everyone here, he's not extremely worried or outright indifferent, he's simply worried enough, excited and happy!
He already knew you were the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, so the idea of having a child with you didn't scare him or intimidate him in the slightest!
He's still a bit worried, though.
He is a wanted fugitive in his homeland, after all...
He can only do so much and wish for the situation in Inazuma to change soon, so that he can take both you and his child to see the places he loved to spend his time at when he was a child.
But for now, he's happy enough simply holding his child on his arms, sitting next to you in your small shared home.
You have a girl too! She has Kazuha's hair color and your eye color, she's super adorable ><
He wants you to name her, and you both agree on naming her Izumi, meaning fountain or spring!
"Kaedehara Izumi... it has a nice ring to it." He'd say, smiling down at her.
While Kazuha enjoys travelling more than anything in this world, he's reticent to leave you and your daughter alone or even bring you along with him. So he stays around for as long as you need it.
He will talk a lot to her all the time, so don't be surprised when she picks up very complicated, flowery words from a young age!
He wants her to grow up to be free as the wind and be able to do whatever she wants without fear, so he wants to do his best to be a good father for her!
Xiao
You can practically see the panic on his face when you tell him the news.
It's the most scared you've ever seen him be, and you've been there to help him through his karmic debt.
So yeah, he takes it the worst out of everyone.
"I'm not mad." He manages to tell you before disappearing to somewhere else in a panicked haze, he needs to sort out his emotions quickly before he can properly talk to you about it. The last thing he saw before he disappeared was your eyes, glinting with sadness. And that only made him feel worse if that was even possible.
It takes him the whole day to come to terms with his feelings on your pregnancy and finally face you again.
He's really, really afraid of hurting you and your child. Not to mention he fears he might've passed some kind of curse from his karma to either of you through the pregnancy :(
Like he said, he isn't mad. He's just scared.
He... he literally never, never thought he would get to be a father.
Family was a foreign concept to him, as were a lot of other things you've slowly helped him understand throughout your time together, so knowing he can have one of his own now... makes him happy, and scared, at the same ime.
He's worse than Diluc when it comes to protecting you and worrying about you.
He won't let you do anything alone, even if he doesn't want to be near you because he doesn't want the karma to harm you or your child in such a vulnerable moment of your lives.
Okay so that aside-
How do people care for babies?
What is he exactly supposed to do?
And- do half-adepti babies need any sort of special treatment in comparison to human babies?
He has no idea on what to do if it doesn't involve a physical fight with a tangible foe, so he goes asking for advice to everyone he knows that could have knowledge on that field.
Verr Goldet and Ganyu are a great help for him. Xiao listens with attention to everything they have to say and asks everything he doesn't understand.
Ganyu tells him about her own experience growing up as half-human so that he can understand what raising a half-human, half-illuminated beast baby might entail.
He also goes to Zhongli for advice and he gets more of the same advice he's already heard, along with many, many reassurances that sound like everything you already tell him every day.
He's very worried, but as the months go by and your child's birth comes closer, he can't help but feel a little excited about it.
Everyone who knows him is happy to see him openly happy for a change on those small moments when he gets excited about his new family with you.
When your child is born, Xiao doesn't want to hold him. It took too much willpower to stay as close as he was right now, standing next to your bed as you held your baby in your arms.
He was so adorable, so small, so fragile, so pure- Xiao was afraid of touching him and breaking or tainting him--
He was already crying, he'd started crying the moment he saw you holding your son for the first time.
He feels so... strange. He's crying, but this isn't a painful, or sad feeling. He feels... happy, but scared, but...
The feeling starts to make some sense to him when he finally convinces himself that it's okay for him to hold the little boy in his arms, when he stares with awe at his face.
The baby looks a lot like the both of you. Arguably, more like him, since he has the same hair and the same bright eyes, but in his face all he can see is you.
And he cries more.
You both named him Liàng, name meaning brilliant!
Xiao does his best to try and get used to parenting, and it gets hard at times.
But he tries, and that's all that matters. He tries to be a good father, and is always there to protect both you and your son from anything trying to harm you.
Even though he was so scared at first, you know he loves the new family you've formed together.
Especially when you catch him trying to hold a conversation with your son, sitting down on the bed next to him as he toys with a soft teddy bear, the two of them surrounded by pillows.
The soft look and smile he wears while he does so tells you that everything is going to be alright.
The three of you are going to be alright, and Xiao wants to make sure of it.
His son will never have to live what he lived or see what he saw. He will make sure of that, no matter what.
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unfoundhoney · 3 years
Text
mother, father, and everything else ↠
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↠ platonic!c!tommyinnit x older sister!reader ; fluff , angst
↠ masterlist
↠ a companion piece to a sister’s sacrifice inspired by this tiktok
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“Tommy, come on,” you call.
You pull your youngest brother’s attention away from the strings of the apron he got distracted by. He toddles over to you as quickly as he can, reaching up and asking to be picked up silently. He started walking early and go the hang of it quite quickly. However, in talking he’s a bit of a late bloomer, nearing fifteen months but yet to say his first words.
You lift Tommy up into your arms, carrying him out the back door and into the backyard. You set him down to play in the grass where you can keep an eye on him then walk over to the array of clotheslines strung up across the yard, beginning to hang up laundry.
Wilbur is off playing with Niki as usual. He’ll likely return covered in dirt and grass stains, maybe with a captured insect or stories of a new, made up kingdom he’d been ruler of that day. Phil is still out with Techno; they’ve been gone for a while now, but that’s nothing new.
You’ve hung up a pair of Wilbur’s pants and two of Tommy’s shirts when you notice Tommy crouched beside the basket full of wet clothes. He reaches inside and pulls out a sock, squeezing it curiously.
“Do you want to help, Tommy?”
Tommy looks up at you, blue eyes wide and mouth slightly open. He nods his head once.
You giggle and ruffle his hair, “Alright, c’mere.”
You lift Tommy up again, resting him on your hip as you grab a clothespin with your free hand. You slip it over the clothesline.
“Put the top of the sock in the pin,” you tell him.
He struggles a bit, little hands still uncoordinated at his young age. He does eventually position the sock where you can close the pin on it and leave it to hang.
“Wow, good job, buddy!” you say.
You wrap him in a hug and spin around, shrieking laughter falling from his mouth at both your actions and your praise. You set him down and kneel down to be at eye level with him.
“You’re my official laundry assistant,” you say seriously. “Can you hand me clothes to hang up?”
Tommy nods eagerly and toddles over to the basket of wet clothes, grabbing a shirt from the top of the pile. He holds it above his head as he runs back over to you, holding it out.
“Good job, Tommy! We’re quite the team, you and I.”
Together, you and Tommy slowly hang the rest of the clothes up. Tommy eventually gets bored and goes off to pick dandelions and pull off their petals, leaving you to finish the chore, not that you mind. When you’re finished, you call Tommy over to get in the basket, carrying him and the leftover clothespin back inside.
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“Y/N!”
The call of your name pulls you to a stop, turning to see who yelled for you. Tommy grabs onto your pant leg for balance, stopping as well. You find Puffy waving at you, hurrying over to you with her little boy Dream at her side.
“Hi, Puffy,” you say. “Hi, Dream.”
“Hi,” Dream says in a small voice.
“Tommy, can you say hi?” you ask the young boy clinging to your hand.
He’s chewing on his thumbnail, looking up at Puffy warily before hiding his face in your leg.
“Guess not,” you laugh.
“How are you, Y/N? I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever,” Puffy says.
“I’m good,” you answer. “Just getting some dinner for tonight.”
“Still the household cook, I see.”
“And just about everything else.”
You laugh and Puffy joins you, but you can tell that wasn’t a joke that went over her head. It’s no joke that you are mother and father to your younger siblings, as well as everything else. Your dad is gone too often; Wilbur doesn’t even call your father “dad,” he calls him Phil.
“Where’s your dad?” Puffy asks.
You shrug, “Around.”
“When’s the last time you saw him?”
You hesitate for too long, distracted as you attempt to remember the last time Phil came home.
“That hardly matters,” you brush off, “He’s busy doing important stuff and I can look after Wilbur and Tommy myself anyway.”
The look of concern on Puffy’s face is not missed by you. You do, however, elect to ignore it.
Dream tugs on Puffy’s sleeve, “Mom.”
“Yeah, buddy?” Puffy asks, leaning down.
Dream points into the market, where you see Sapnap with his father and his friend George.
“Go say hi, but don’t wander too far,” Puffy tells Dream.
When she turns back to you, keeping one eye on her son, you say, “I’ve gotta head home. Need to make dinner and all that.”
“Yeah, okay,” Puffy says. “I’m here if you ever need help. Or someone to talk to. Or... anything really.”
“Thanks, Puffy.”
You don’t notice at your side, Tommy trying to form the word that Dream used that so quickly got his mother’s attention.
“Look after yourself, Y/N.”
“I am.” You always have.
With a wave, you turn and head back home, Tommy walking slowly beside you. The walk from the market to your house takes about fifteen minutes and you end up carrying Tommy for most of it to speed things up.
When you arrive home, you find Wilbur and Niki sat in the front yard playing a hand clapping game. They stop when they spot you, jumping up and running to come meet you as you walk up the front path.
“Y/N! Y/N! Y/N!” Wilbur shouts your names repeatedly.
“Will! Will! Will!” you mimic.
“Can I spend the night at Niki’s?” Wilbur asks.
You like Niki. She’s sweet and a good influence for Wilbur.
“Uhm, as long as her parents are alright with it,” you say, doing your best to sound like a grown up despite only being sixteen.
“We’ve already talked to them,” Niki tells you.
“Alright, then,” you concede. “Behave while you’re there.”
“I will, Y/N!” Wilbur says, running off with Niki.
You watch them go for a few moments until you’re reminded of the toddler sitting on your hip. Tommy squirms around, wanting down. You set him on the ground and walk with him inside.
You set him up with some paper and crayons at the kitchen table. You sit across from him, watching as he carefully looks over his color options before choosing the red crayon.
“Looks like it’s just you and me, bud,” you muse.
You pet Tommy’s hair before you stand, moving to start on dinner. You season meat and chop potatoes, humming to yourself and keeping an eye on Tommy. Thankfully, your youngest brother isn’t a picky eater, which makes meals a lot easier than they could be, especially since he’s been in the solid foods stage for a while now.
The rest of the night is fairly quiet. You and Tommy eat dinner then you do the dishes while he waddles around the living room and plays with some of his toys. You can hear him experimenting with running, his footfalls surprisingly loud for such a small human. You hear him fall, as well, but without any crying then the return of his heavy footsteps, you don’t go to check on him.
You start composing your next shopping list and check the calendar for any upcoming events. There’s a festival next week that you’re meant to chaperone Wilbur and his friends at. Maybe you can team up with Puffy so Tommy can play with Tubbo, and Dream can join Wilbur. You’ll ask her tomorrow.
You hear Tommy enter the kitchen. He waddles over to where you sit at the table and crawls into your lap. He grabs your free hand and starts playing with your fingers as you continue writing down what you’ll need for your bigger grocery run in a few days.
“Mom.”
You freeze.
What?
“Mom.”
You look down at Tommy.
He looks up at you, “Mom.”
“N-No...,” you say weakly.
“Mom.”
“No, I’m not your mom.”
“Mom.”
“No...”
“Mom!” Tommy says happily. “Mom mom mom!”
“Okay, okay,” you say shakily, putting a hand gently over your little brother’s mouth to get him to stop. “Okay, good job.”
Your vision’s blurry. You want to cry. Your chest hurts. But right now, Tommy’s said his first word.
“Good job,” you repeat.
You pull Tommy into a hug and wipe at your eyes behind his back.
Tommy rests his little cheek on your shoulder, already tired but quickly drifting off to sleep in your warm embrace, “Mom...”
“Shhh,” you say, voice weak.
Tommy goes limp, asleep in your arms. As your tears begin to fall, you make sure not to let your sobs move you. How has this happened? Mom. No. You’re not a mother. Except you are. In every way that matters, you are Tommy’s mother. You’ve raised him ever since Phil brought him home that day.
You wish your family was normal. As normal as a family of four adopted children, a single father, and a non-biological uncle could be. You wish your dad was home more. You wish you didn’t have to be the only parental figure Tommy has ever known. It’s to the point he calls you mom. How could Phil let it get to this? How could he care so little?
You just want to have a normal family with parents who are adults and kids who are allowed to be children. You did not get to be a child, but Wilbur and Tommy will. You will always be there for them. You promise. You will give them what you had taken from you. Hatred for your father burns in your chest but it’s quickly snuffed out, doused by nostalgia that longs for a childhood you never had.
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darkmulti · 3 years
Note
(Yandere and non con warning)
Def not the only one who wants a 18th century h.c of possessive and controlling, husband!Jungkook x forced wife!reader. Jungkook gets jealous after witnessing another man asking you out and when you come back home at night, he breeds you. Please make it rough and non con. Thank you❤️‍🔥
-> you’re definitely not the only one. I can assure you that I’ve thought about this too many times😫
⚠️: NON CON, YANDERE!JUNGKOOK, Squirting/piss play, Physically, mental and emotional abuse, spit play,
-> sorry for any mistakes
Your parents owned a local bakery store
All the recipes were from your late grandmother
You spent almost all of your time there because you were in charge of everything
The store was under your parents’ name but you were the one running it
Sometimes, you even slept there because it’d be too late to walk home
Your dedication to the bakery made it successful
Although, you were the one doing all the work, you parents took all the credit and money
They weren’t paying you because you’re their child
They don’t need to pay you
“It’s a women’s place.” Your father said
You wanted to go back to school however, your parents laughed in your face
“School aren’t for girls, Y/N. Learn how to cook and clean. That’s all you need to know. Let the men handle everything else.”
You were tired of fighting with them and eventually stopped because they threatened to set you up in an arrange marriage
Now, it was just you and the bakery
You had many loyal customers and recently, one has been coming everyday, at the same time
He’d always buy a loaf of banana bread and if he was in a good mood, a blueberry muffin as well
Then, he’d sit in the corner table and eat two - three slices before getting up and leaving
He’d always leave a tip behind and you always kept it for yourself
One day, he didn’t come and you were surprised
For a year straight, he came and bought the same two things
Now, he hasn’t visited in 4 days
Tonight, you came back home for the first time in a while
Your parents had visited the bakery to collect “their” earnings and told you that you have to go somewhere with them that evening
After closing up and cleaning up, you went home and got ready
Your parents were taking you out for dinner as a treat for all your hard work
You were really excited because they were finally acknowledging your hard work
Once you arrived at the restaurant, your parents lead you to a table that already had three people seated
You immediately recognize one of them
It’s that guy who buys your banana loaf!
You sat in front of him while your parents greeted the two other strangers
“Oh, so this is your daughter? She’s gorgeous! Come here and give me a hug.”
You awkwardly chuckled and got up to hug the middle aged women
“Oh! Where are my manners? My name is Jeon F/N, this is my husband, Jeon F/N and this is our son, Jeon Jungkook. We’re your soon to be in laws!”
You heart dropped to the floor
“I-in laws?” You asked, confused
“Yeah, honey. Is this your first time hearing about this? We’ve been talking to your parents for a while now.”
You snapped your head towards you parents and they looked emotionless
“No, no they didn’t tell me anything.”
Dinner with them was hell
Your parents were talking about your wedding arrangements right in front of you
You didn’t know what to do
You wanted to rebel but then your parents would disown you
Just like that, you’d be homeless with little money to survive
In the end, you’d be paying the heavy price
You looked at Jungkook who was staring at you the whole time
You wondered if he knew about this
Maybe, that’s why he came to the bakery everyday
“Did you know anything about this?” You said loud enough for him to hear
“I did.”
“For how long?”
“Since last year.”
You eyes widen, in shock
You were right!
“Why didn’t you stop it?”
“Why would I stop it when I’m the one who wants it?”
You scrunch your eyebrows, in confusion
“What’re you talking about?”
“Since the first day I met you, I wanted to marry you. I told my parents and now, we’re getting married.”
Now, you were mad
You got up and stormed off, catching everyone’s attention
You walked to the bakery and locked yourself in
Here, you thought your parents were acknowledging you for first time, when they were actually setting you up for a marriage so they don’t have to take care of you
You cried yourself to sleep that night
The next couple of weeks, the bakery was closed due to your wedding
The wedding was spectacular
You would’ve love it if you weren’t being forced into a marriage
After the wedding, Jungkook took your precious virginity
He made sure to pleasure you until you passed out
He was so in love with you
Now, he was finally able to show you how much he loved you
And mark you as his
The next couple of months, he was attached to you
He took over his family’s business and you took over your family’s business
He’d visit you every day at work to check if you’re with another man
He was so paranoid about it, sometimes he’d come by 3 or 4 times to make sure you were not cheating
You thought he missed you and that’s why he kept stopping by (which is half true) however, you had no idea that he was possessive and controlling
You had to learn the hard way
Sometimes, you wouldn’t leave work until midnight
You had so much things to do like preparing for the next day, making a to-do list, making a grocery lists, and cleaning every area of the shop
It’s time consuming, so obviously you finish up pretty late
Jungkook absolutely hates that
Although you stay late in the shop once in a while, he can’t stand it
He wants you to be in his arms every night
Jungkook gets angry when you’re not
This was your fourth time staying out late in the shop and he’s had enough
He couldn’t help but feel paranoid about what you were actually doing in the shop
What if you lied and went on a date with another man?
What if you were running away from him?
Or even worse, what if you were having sex with another guy?
He raced to the bakery and banged on the door, which scared you
You saw that it was him and let him in
“W-what’s wrong?! You scared me!”
“Grab your stuff, we’re going home.”
“But I’m not done yet! I only have a couple more things to do and then I’ll come home. I told you already-”
“I don’t think you fucking heard me!” He yelled and grabbed your hair
“Grab your shit, we are leaving right now.”
He pushed you towards the counter and crossed his arms
You let your breath out in shock but scurry to get your stuff
You’ve never seen him like this and it terrified you
“I have my stuff.”
“Good, let’s go.”
He helped you lock the door and wrapped his arm around your waist
The walk home was silent
You were scared shitless
All you wanted to do was run back into your parents’ house
But he didn’t let you move an inch away from him
Once you got home, he started pushing you around and arguing some more
“Jungkook, I told you this afternoon when you came to visit! I said I have to stay late so I don’t have to stress myself out in the morning!”
“Don’t fucking lie to me! Who were you fucking seeing?!” He screamed, frightening you more
“No one! I swear, no one!” You whimpered
He corned you into your shared room and locked the door
“Jungkook, I swear! Nothing happened!”
He didn’t believe a single word coming out of your mouth
It was like you were talking to a wall
He pushed you onto the bed and stripped you naked
Jungkook pushed two fingers into your cunt and pretended to scoop out cum
“If nothing happened, why is your cunt full of cum?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about! I didn’t have sex with anyone!”
You weren’t very educated about sex, so Jungkook had an advantage
You began apologizing even though you didn’t have sex with anyone
You just wanted peace between you two
“I’m sorry! I didn’t cheat or anything, but I’m sorry if it hurt you! I really am!”
Jungkook slapped you and spat on your face
“Dirty slut. Telling me that you’re not cheating but still apologizing.”
“No! Please, I didn’t do anything!”
Jungkook pulled his cock out and shoved it in without warning
You were still new to sex so when he didn’t let you adjust, you automatically started screaming and crying
“Please, slower!” You cried, holding onto his biceps as he went faster and deeper
“Stop! Please!”
Jungkook loved the sound of his balls clapping against your ass
It honestly made him harder
All night, he was on top, fucking you hard
Your legs were spread apart, tears in your eyes and sweat dripping down your forehead
You looked like a hot mess
And he loved every second of it
“Mmh- Jungkook!”
You squirted around him and had a trembling orgasm
You couldn’t stop releasing your liquids on him and he couldn’t stop pounding you
The bed sheet was soaked by the end of it
He pushed his cock deep inside and came
After Jungkook fell asleep, you cried for while
How were you supposed to tolerate him for the rest of your life?
The next morning
You woke up in severe pain
You lower region was begging for some pain relief
But there was nothing you could do about it
Jungkook was still sleeping next to you
You decided to leave before he wakes up
After getting ready by leaning on everything, you slowly walked to town
When you arrived at the bakery, you saw a big “for sale” sign
You panicked and went inside the store, only to be greeted by your parents
“Mother, father! Why is there a “for sale” sign on the bakery?”
You parents looked at each other in disappointment
“You see, we have to explain the obvious to your daughter. Be grateful that someone willingly married your idiot daughter.” Your father said before walking out
His words did hurt but you cared about the bakery more than your father
“Why’re you selling it, mother? Can you not afford it anymore? Why-”
“Shut up, Y/N! You’re married now, you have wifely duties. You don’t have time for this bakery so the best option is to sell it.”
Your world fell apart right before your eyes
“But mother-”
“Save it. You already made your father upset. I’m warning you now, you don’t want to get on my bad side.”
You cried the whole morning
After you opened the bakery, lots of people gathered in line
All breads, cakes and muffins were going on sale
After you served the people in line, you went up to the tables and took their order
After you served them, a regular customer who was sitting alone gestured you to come over
You went over to the man and asked him if he needed anything
He told you to take a seat and accompany him
Since the crowd died down, you sat down in front of him
“You look a bit stressed and sad. What’s on your mind?”
You were touched by his words
Finally, someone cared about you
You told him you were upset about the bakery closing
He understood and even offered money to help you keep it open
You were flattered but didn’t accept the money
“Money’s not a problem, my parents just don’t want to keep this shop open.”
You talked with this guy for a couple of hours
Although this was your first time talking to him, you talked to him like he was your best friend
When closing time came around, he got up and asked you out on a date
You didn’t know what to do
You were married but you really liked this guy
You were considering saying yes when someone pulled his shoulder back and punched him across the face
“Jungkook! What the hell is wrong with you?!”
“You think I didn’t see that?! I saw it all. I saw you flirting with my wife for three hours straight and then asking her out on a date!”
Jungkook beat the crap out of the guy and pushed him outside
He then came back in the store, looking at you with devil eyes
“Yesterday’s punishment clearly wasn’t enough.”
The entire way home, he was yelling at you, slapping you, spitting on you, pulling your hair, pushing you to the ground and choking you
You were crying the whole time, apologizing over and over
When you arrived home, he seriously had no mercy on you
No foreplay, no lube, no adjusting
Just a raw, thick cock being forced into you
You were begging him to let you go but tonight, nothing was going to stop him
He was moving his hips insanely fast, not giving you enough time to breathe
You were choking on your own sobs
“Jungkook, please no! I’m sorry!”
“Why did you hesitate to deny his offer? You are a married fucking women!” With each word a hard thrust followed, knocking all the air out of you
“Answer me! Is he better than me? Does he take care of you? Does he provide money for you? TELL ME!” He was yelling so loudly, it was making you cry harder
“N-no, he doesn’t. He was just the first person to care about me.” You whispered the last sentence but, Jungkook was able to make it out
“Are you saying that I don’t care about you?”
He got more aggressive and fastened his pace
“Tell me, Y/N! Do you think that I don’t care about you?!”
You couldn’t answer him because you couldn’t catch your breath
He was going too fast and you were crying so hard, you couldn’t breathe
Jungkook noticed how much you were struggling and added onto your struggle by holding your neck down
“Apologize, right now Jeon Y/N!”
You softly apologize but it wasn’t good enough for him
He lifted your legs a little, giving him better access and fucked you till you squirted
This time you sobbed your apology and begged for forgiveness
“I’m so sorry, Jungkook! It’ll never— ah! It’ll never happen again! I’m so sorry! Please for- forgive me for my dumb m-mistake. Please! I’m begging you.” You held onto the bed sheet, praying he would stop
He huskily growled and pushed his cock in deep
“For the next 9 months you’ll be swelling with my baby. Now, everyone can back off.”
He shot his hot cum right into you, filling you up to the rim
Sorry for any mistakes. It’s 3:41am 😄
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Text
Laisse tomber les filles 3
Warnings: non-consent sex and rape; size kink; age gap; manipulation; tags to be added as story progresses
This is a dark!fic and Lee Bodecker x (short) reader and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Synopsis: You find yourself ostracized on campus by your shyness, but your reticence won’t deter an unwanted suitor.
Note: Lee’s slowly creepin’ and I hope you’re ready for it.
Thanks to everyone for reading and thanks in advance for all your feedback. :)
I really hope you enjoy. 💋
<3 As usual, I’d appreciate if you let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!
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You slurped the last of your shake through the straw, the paper cup damp in your cold hands as the heater blew out hot air. The foamy dregs of the drink were overly sweet and made your cheeks twinge. Lee popped the lid off his cup and offered it and you slipped yours inside. He pulled the straw out and stacked the lids, squeezing both straws through and setting it on the seat beside him.
He stretched his arm over the leather, his hand just behind your head and you listened to the deep voice of the narrator recount the eerie words of HP Lovecraft. You fidgeted and looked at your watch. The sky was dark and the stars twinkled down ominously.
“Um,” you uttered, “I think... uh…”
He looked at you and his hand hovered close to your shoulder, “what is it, honey?”
“I think I should get home,” you finished.
“Oh, why’s that? You don’t got class tomorrow, do ya?”
“I don’t but… well, I’m tired,” you rubbed your neck and sat up so he couldn’t touch you, “I had an early morning.”
“Well, of course,” he retracted his arm and straightened up, he pulled the car into gear and slowly pressed down on the gas, “you should get to bed, little girl.”
You scowled at the venom in his last two words. He’d been nice but he had no right to patronize you. You hated that most. People thought because you were quiet they could just treat you like you were dull.
“I’m not… not a little girl,” you eked out.
“Ah, I didn’t mean nothing by it,” he said as he pulled out of the lot, “you are little though, ain’t ya?”
You felt a peculiar heat creep up your neck and cheeks. You were short but you’d met a few people smaller than you. People came in all shapes and sizes. You didn’t comment on his stomach or the wrinkles around his eyes. Yet, the humour in his voice kept you from rebuke.
“I guess, I…”
‘I don’t mean it as an insult, you see?” he chuckled, “kinda cute you can’t reach the floor.”
“Mmm,” you inhaled and pursed your lips. You pulled the collar of your pea coat closed and wiggled your foot nervously.
“I see,” he said, “you got your friends waitin’ on ya, huh? Yeah, young girl like you don’t wanna be hanging around an old man all night.”
“I didn’t say that,” you said.
“Hey, I’m not stupid, I was only bein’ nice,” he interrupted, “you looked lonely and I… I got carried away.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t…” you scrambled as he passed by the college entrance, “I was… I don’t know.”
“Well, you’re in such a hurry, honey, you can’t wait to be away from me,” he ranted, “actin’ all sweet and shy but you just like the rest of them.”
“What?” you grimaced and watched the buildings pass by, “no, I’m not. I…” you felt guilty as if you’d done something wrong. All you wanted was to go home and lay down, but it felt like a personal affront. “I… lied.”
“What?” he asked as your voice fizzled.
“I lied, sir,” you confessed, “I don’t have any friends. Not really, just… classmates.”
“Nah, that can’t be true,” he scoffed, “who wouldn’t wanna be friends with a pretty girl like you?”
“No, no, please, I… I’m sorry, I just want to go home, okay? I’m tired,” you cupped your cheek and slumped in defeat.
He was quiet for a moment as he drove along. He turned along the line of residences and streetlights flashed over his profile as he stared at the road. He flipped into park as he stopped in front of your building and nodded. 
“Alright, I believe you,” he said at last, “I don’t wanna keep you up and I didn’t mean to get so upset. It's just, well, I like being with you.”
“It’s fine, thank you… for everything. The milkshake was good.”
“No, I mean it, it’s a pity no one else can see it,” he went on, “you’re real smart and nice. You got a pretty smile too when you show it, too.”
“Thank you,” you said quietly as you gripped the door handle, “that’s very kind. I should go--”
“Wait, wait,” he caught your arm, not tightly, but kept you from getting out as the door opened an inch, “can I come back? Next week, we’ll have another shake and listen to the show. I’m really curious what happens.”
“I don’t know, I… I have lots of work to do,” you looked at his large hand on your arm. He dropped it and wiped his palm on his brown pants.
“You bring your homework, honey, you can study and listen, I don’t mind,” he offered, “if you don’t want a shake, we can get some burgers and fries. Have a nice dinner?”
You smushed your lips together and thought. He hadn’t done anything bad enough to warrant that feeling in your gut. You were overthinking things just like you always did. Besides, he had to be almost fifty, he was just being friendly, he said it himself. 
And what else did you have to do? You didn’t have any friends and it was too late to start making them.
“I… okay,” you said softly, “my book club ends at seven. It’s over at Clover Hall.”
“I’ll find you there then,” he smiled, “now go on, before I keep you out any later.”
You got out and scooped out your bag with you. You closed the door and headed up the path without looking back. You got to the door and focused on unlocking it. Your hands were shaking and your mind was reeling. You always lamented being little more than a fly on the wall but it was completely overwhelming to be noticed.
📚
You clacked away on the keys of your typewriter. Your dorm room was small and stuffy as dry heat rose from the dingy old radiator. You could hear your roommates in the kitchen as they gabbed and laughed loudly. You were jealous yet too intimidated to try and ingratiate yourself. You always just ended up in the corner as everyone else had fun.
Your assignment was to write a review of a primary resource borrowed from your visit to the archive. You carefully looked over the laminated manuscript between sentences. Your small radio played in the background and you couldn’t help but nod to the full tones of the jazzy music.
You were drawn from your entranced study by a knock at your door. It was unusual to be disturbed unless there were chores to dole out. You didn’t have time to wipe up their messes again. You got up and went to the door and opened it an inch.
“Hi,” you said meekly as Gina stood with a box in her hands.
“This is for you,” she held out the package, “it was down at the residence office.”
“Me?” you let the door fall open and took the box, “I don’t…” You looked it over but there was no address, only your name, “thank you.”
She left without another word and you nudged the door shut with your elbow as you turned. Your parents only sent you letters, they didn’t like to pay the pricy postage for a whole package. You put the box down on your single bed and peeled back the brown tape. The flaps came open and you peeked inside curiously.
You took out the skirt, a yellow plaid piece shorter than anything you’d ever owned. It was the new style found on the cover of Vogue. You put it aside and reach for the blouse, a pure white thing with bell sleeves. Lastly, a pair of knee high heels to top off the mod look.
There was an envelope amid it all, the note inside short and scribbled.
‘Saw this and thought of you, honey.’
You stared at the paper and folded it back up. It was a nice gesture but you couldn’t wear that. You couldn’t accept the gift either, it was too much. Every garment you owned was second-hand and you’d seen the prices of these clothes in the magazines. 
And, you wondered as you packed the box and shoved it against the wall, why would the sheriff buy you all that? His friendliness made you uneasy. It was suffocating and yet, you could find no fault in someone being too generous. 
You realised too, how little you knew about him. What if he had wife or even a family? What if he didn’t? What if he was only doing it to fill in some gap in his life? Maybe he was playing out some father-daughter relationship he never had.
Well, you could ask him next time you saw him. Or try to.
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titularkilljoy · 3 years
Text
sometimes and always
//a love story in five acts
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female Reader
Summary: It's hard to resist falling into bed with a cute neighbour, but it turns out it's even harder to resist falling for him. (alternatively- Spencer Reid and the reader struggle to resolve their feelings but make valiant attempts to do so while lying horizontally in each other's beds.)
Word Count: 7k
Warnings: Explicit sexual content, strong language, decidedly non-American spelling conventions
Author's Note: SO. This fic was originally part of a fic swap for the wickedly talented @imagining-in-the-margins, but it is now over six months too late. Thankfully, patience apparently springs eternal in her?? besides all the other amazing things?? Unfair, but good for me. So, Pom, this one is for you. Thanks for being the absolute best and putting up with my rants and not judging me for mocking everything and everyone all the time. Love, Perpetually Tardy.
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(i)
This is how it happened the first time.
I was frowning at the pitiful stack of mail in my hands, wondering if the conspicuously missing letters and subscriptions would ever be returned to me. Ever since moving to my new apartment, I had been at the mercy of the Postal System and that was never a good situation to be in. I’d resigned myself to having to take an extra trip back to my old building and do some investigating, when the elevator dinged and I stepped in. Just as the doors slid closed, there was the frantic rumble of footsteps and a hand slipping into the narrowing gap.
The doors sprang apart to let in the harried owner of the appendage, who barely spared me a glance before turning to face the front, eyes briefly darting to the buttons. It took me a second to recognise him. It was the guy from the apartment opposite to mine, although so far that seemed to be only a nominal living arrangement; in my two weeks there, I’d seen him exactly once, merely in passing, and we had exchanged a sum total of zero words.
I followed his lead and stopped blatantly staring at him, though I continued studying him covertly through my peripheral vision. He looked—well, his jawline looked like it could cut glass effortlessly and he had the soft chestnut hair of a male model and I knew I was probably going to develop a very embarrassing crush on him at some point— but besides that, he looked browbeaten, his whole posture seeming to buckle under the invisible weight of the world.
There was an awkward moment when he realised we were both heading in the same direction, and I took it upon myself to break the ice.
“Hi,” I greeted, introducing myself, “I just moved in. I don’t think I’ve seen you around.” I gave him my warmest smile.
His swift assessing glance would have escaped my notice if I hadn’t been paying such close attention; his expression was still shuttered off, but he offered an endearing little quirk of his lips and an introduction. “Spencer Reid. I’ve-uh, I’ve been away on a work thing.”
“Oh? What do you do?” I asked, beginning a leisurely walk down the hallway and fishing my keys out of my bag. I immediately regretted the query when, impossibly, his eyes became even more guarded.
“I’m an FBI agent.”
Well, that clipped admission would have given anyone pause. “Oh, wow. That’s really impressive, dude.”
“Thanks.” He hesitated before adding, “I’m part of the Behavioural Analysis Unit.”
“So, you’re like a psychologist?”
“I catch serial killers.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
The silence wasn’t uncomfortable so much as it was brimming with my insecurities. The alcohol in my blood helped with that, though; the next words were out of my mouth before I even registered the thought.
“Do you want to come in?”
“Oh, uh—”
He was going to say no.
“It’s just that you look like you could use some company. And I think it’s absolutely criminal that we haven’t gotten to know each other yet.”
“It’s really late.”
But he was rocking forwards on his toes just the tiniest bit, leading me to believe that some part of him did want to take me up on my offer that night.
“So it is. Come on, Agent Reid. Be a good neighbour.”
“It’s Doctor, actually,” he corrected. “Doctor Reid. I have Ph.Ds. Three of them.”
My eyebrows had risen to my hairline and, sensing the change in the air, he hurried to put me at ease. “But you can just call me Spencer.”
“Huh. You don’t hear that every day.” I chuckled sheepishly. “Well, come on in, Doctor.”
There was a moment when his whole body leaned towards me and his face looked conflicted but slightly enthusiastic, and I was convinced I could turn the night into a very pleasant one for both of us. Then, with a loud clatter, my keys slipped from my hands, startling us. The moment was broken, and I sighed in resignation.
“Let me guess, you’ve decided I’m too drunk and we’re going to go our separate ways.”
At least he had the good grace to look apologetic. “I just don’t think it’s a good idea right now,” he told me slowly as he bent down to pick up my keys and pressed them securely into my outstretched hand, “It’s late and I’ve had a long day. I’ll...see you around?”
“Sure,” I managed to say with a regretful smile, “I’m holding you to that.”
*~*
That, however, turned out to be easier said than done, for a variety of reasons, not the least of which was the Herculean feat of unpacking and organising my new place with a mild hangover and a tinge of frustration over lost opportunities looming over me. Once that was dealt with, the bigger challenge turned out to be actually locating the man in question. I knocked on his door a few times, but when the responding silence continued to persist for over a week, I began to think he’d just been a drunken hallucination in the first place. And the longer I went without any follow-up interactions, the more intensely I started overthinking the slightly fuzzy memory of our brief conversation.
Of course I’d managed to make a fool of myself in front of a really cute guy. That was absolutely in character for me. Every time I passed by his door, I convinced myself a little more that I owed him a sincere apology for my poor, inconsiderate conduct.
Beyond the embarrassment, however, work didn’t leave me much time to think about it, and by the time I was trudging to my apartment the next Saturday, the whole encounter had been relegated firmly to the back burner. Naturally, that was when the faint glow of light under his door distracted me from the very passive-aggressive email I was composing. I hesitated.
The deep breaths I sucked in didn’t serve much more purpose than to make me somewhat lightheaded, but I forged on anyway. I knocked on the door, and waited.
There was silence, followed by the sound of reluctantly shuffling feet, and then, finally, I was face to face with Spencer Reid once again.
“Um,” I started, “hi.”
He stared at me wordlessly for a beat, during which I started to wonder if he’d actually forgotten me already.
“So, we met the other day, and I just want to apologise. I didn’t mean to come on to you so strongly, and I get that you weren’t int-”
“Do you want to come inside?”
“..What?”
“Do you want to come inside?” he repeated, enunciating clearly. That didn’t clear up my confusion, though.
“Um. Yes? Sure. I mean, no, shouldn’t we talk about this a bit?”
He let out a tired laugh. “I don’t want to talk right now.”
“Alright,” I said, biting my lip. I followed him inside, and pushed the door closed behind me; it emitted an innocuous little click as it fell shut.
There was something about the weariness behind his eyes and the careful set of his jaw that made me want to study him and understand what was going through his head, but all I could glean that night was that Spencer didn’t seem amenable to much time spent on documentation.
“So,” I began unsurely, shedding my jacket and scanning the contents of the room, the piles upon piles of books and the distinct lack of much else, “tell me about yourself.”
“Didn’t I already do that?”
“Hmm, that’s not the whole story,” I mumbled, running my fingers over a broken-spined, wrinkled copy of Paradise Lost laid open on a heavy wooden desk. A single smudge of blue ink stood out against the yellowing page, and beside it, the print read: This horror will grow mild, this darkness light. “You’re not just an FBI agent.”
“That’s all that’s important,” he asserted, taking a step towards me. He had one eye on my curiously wandering fingers and, sensing that it was making him more antsy than he needed to be, I tucked my hands into my back pockets, facing him with a grin of false bravado. I really wished I was drunk. That would have made things infinitely easier.
“Besides,” he continued, this time meeting my eyes directly, “I don’t know anything about you either.”
“Fair enough,” I conceded, stepping closer to him.
His eyes didn’t leave mine, until my own strayed to the bobbing curve of his throat and the tantalising motion of his tongue sweeping over his bottom lip. Not for the first time that week, I wondered how terrible of an idea it would be to try to kiss my attractive neighbour. I could see my own apprehensions mirrored in his stance, and I saw the exact moment when he identified the focus of my gaze.
I didn’t have to spend much time contemplating. He decided, just as I did, that any consequences of this impulsive decision could be dealt with later.. I lunged for him just as he closed the distance in one long stride, grasping my jaw in both his hands. Then we were firmly attached at the lips, and his arms wrapped around my waist and dragged me closer, seemingly intent on devouring my mouth. Gradually, our actions slowed a bit, the kiss turning softer and more exploratory, our tongues winding around each other gently, my lungs readily accepting his deep, nasal sigh.
His arms around my waist were a steadily spreading band of warmth, and I could feel the growing evidence of his arousal against my thigh. I found myself thinking I could be very happy with just kissing him like this, feeling his breaths tickle my face, letting my hands suffer minute pinpricks from the stubble littering his jaw. But then his grip shifted to my hips and tightened ever so slightly, and it was like I’d been doused with fuel and set alight. My fingers struggled to unbutton his shirt as he pressed distracting kisses along my neck, my soft whimpers breaking the relative silence of the room.
All of a sudden, the ground shifted and my stomach swooped, and it took a second or two before I realised I was now in his arms, being carried towards, presumably, his bedroom. Content, I got to work on undoing the last button and trying to slip the shirt down his arms entirely. He granted me a chuckle for my troubles before laying me down gently on our destination and taking it off himself.
He didn’t waste any time in sinking his knees into the soft mattress on either side of my legs, helping me out of my own clothes and methodically kissing every bit of newly exposed skin, until finally, I was clad only in flimsy cotton and he was nosing at my aching core. With two fingers, he deftly removed the last of my defences and pressed his mouth against me. I moaned, my hands flying to his hair and trying to keep from pulling too hard as he used his tongue to examine every inch of my arousal, evidently experimenting based on the sounds he managed to elicit from me.
“Oh, my God,” I babbled, hips bucking wildly under the iron grip holding them down.
“Tell me,” he demanded, pulling away slightly, “tell me how much you like it.”
“Spencer,” I breathed desperately, “Please. I need- I need more.”
He hummed leisurely against me, frustrating me to no end. My grip in his hair tightened at last, guiding him where I needed him most, and I swear I felt his lips stretch into a smile.
It went on for what felt like hours, but there was no earthly way I could have lasted that long. He took mercy on me eventually, plunging two long fingers deep inside me, closing his lips around the bundle of nerves that, predictably, sent me into a violent, shaking climax. He nursed me patiently through the aftershocks, waiting till my legs had stilled before rising to undo his belt and rid himself of his pants. I was already mourning the loss of his closeness, and I pulled him back on top of me the moment he was within reach.
“Come on, Doctor,” I taunted, “It’s time you made good on your promise and got to the main event.”
“I never promised anything,” he retorted, but the playful glint in his eyes excited me, and while he reached over beside us to the nightstand, I rose to the occasion.
“Oh? Well, if you don’t want to, I guess I’ll just head out, then,” I teased, going so far as to attempt to sit up from underneath him. I felt a low, threatening sound begin in his chest and make its way up his throat as his hands gripped my wrists and brought them down to my sides, pinning me in place.
It was my turn to chuckle at his eagerness, lifting my head to briefly peck him on his lips.
“Don’t worry, Spencer,” I cooed, “I’m not going anywhere. Now fuck me already.”
“With pleasure,” came the response, and while I wondered idly how a smirk could simultaneously be sinister and bashful, there was the sharp sound of crinkling foil, and then he cut off my thoughts by entering me in one fluid motion.
“Fuck!” I cried out, holding him around the shoulders, bringing him impossibly closer.
“That’s it,” he groaned in my ear, “let me hear you.”
He set a torturous rhythm, thrusting into me harshly before pulling out slowly, carefully, making me relish the sensation, anticipation building steadily in the pit of my stomach and spreading until it engulfed me. A ceaseless litany of moans and whimpers filled the air around us, the source of each barely discernible. At last, I could feel myself riding the very precipice, and his name began to fall from my lips like a prayer.
“Spencer,” I called, “Spenc-”
He swallowed the rest of my inconsequential cries, bringing his thumb to where we were joined to guide me over the edge, and as I convulsed around him soundlessly, he reached his own climax, blunt fingernails leaving crescent marks on my hips, his heavy panting breaths stuttering, once, against my clavicle, before calming and slowly evening out.
We stayed that way for a few minutes, my hand combing lightly through his hair, his closed-mouth kisses pressing against my neck like a balm. Eventually, though, we had to move, and it was he who did first. He pulled out and walked away from the bed without looking at me, tossing the tied-up condom in the trash. I sat up, cross-legged, watching him for a bit, pursing my lips when I noticed he was actively avoiding my gaze.
I cleared my throat. “Where’s your bathroom?”
He pointed in a general direction and mumbled something incoherent; sighing in disappointment, I stood up gingerly and went to clean myself up. When I returned, the room still smelled like sex, and Spencer was still evasive, but he was sitting on the edge of the bed now. He looked up when I entered, watching me pick up my clothes.
“Are you alright?” he asked quietly.
I glanced over at him. “Yeah, I’m good. You?”
Nodding, he watched me get dressed, then followed me into the living room and watched me drape my jacket over my arm. Then he watched me walk to the door, all the while not saying a word.
The cool steel of the doorknob in my hand, I looked over my shoulder one more time.
“Well, Spencer. You know where to find me, I guess,” I muttered, shaking my head slightly. Then I left his apartment, and despite the enormity of what had transpired during my visit, the click of the door closing sounded exactly the same.
.
(ii)
Of course, after that, I resolved it would never happen again. The man next door clearly had some issues with what we had done, and I couldn’t be bothered to solve them. It was, frankly, idiotic to jeopardise the prospect of good neighbours in favour of sex, however great it might have been.
It was embarrassing how quickly my resolution packed its bags and jumped out of my third-storey window.
I was awoken the next morning by three firm raps on my door. I think I knew, somehow, who was trying to get my attention, so I took my time, but the reveal of Spencer’s regretful face didn’t surprise me any less. I was wary as I stared at him wordlessly, cycling through all the possible reasons for his visit, and his eyes dropped to the way my arms tightly hugged my midsection. He winced then, meeting my eyes.
“I’m sorry for the way I acted,” he blurted, and it sounded so rehearsed that I had to stifle a guffaw. There was a flicker of something in his eyes that could have been frustration, but he powered through. “I’ve had a pretty terrible week at work and I think I was trying to get something out of my head. But I was awful to you, and it was completely my fault. I’m sorry if I offended you. I had...a great time.”
I’d been watching him carefully throughout his speech, and if he was faking the earnestness in those last couple of lines, he was an extraordinary actor. I concluded, as I studied the apologetic slump of his shoulders and the dark bags into which his eyes had sunken, that I didn’t need to worry about the veracity of his words.
“It’s okay,” I said hesitantly. “I mean, no, it’s not okay, it felt really awful, but thanks for explaining. I get it now.”
“Oh,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck and looking off to the side, “that’s great. Thank you.” He shoved his hands deep into his pockets.
“Problem?” I was bemused.
“No!” He was looking back at me, now. “I- well, to be honest, I wasn’t expecting it to be this easy. I thought I’d have to convince you.”
“Huh. Well, you can still convince me, Doctor. Give me a second to get ready. You’re buying me breakfast.”
I quite liked the shy smile that graced his face in response.
*~*
It kept happening. There was no way I could have stopped it, and there was no reason I would have wanted to.
We quickly grew into a familiar rhythm. Each time, it started with one of us having a particularly stressful day. Each time, it started with a knock on the door and some perfunctory shuffling around. Before wasn’t the time for talking. Each time, we’d stumble into whichever surface was closest, and every time it wasn’t the bed, Spencer would make some halfhearted protests about germs and hygiene, before I shut him up very effectively with a manicured hand on his dick. Each time, in the During, I marvelled at how well we fit together, how quickly we’d learned each other’s bodies, and each time, I saw more of him than I had the last.
And I loved every bit of it.
Spencer no longer retreated into his shell in the After. He’d try sometimes, but I knew how to coax him out, now. I’d slip my hand into his, ever so gently, and wait. Or I’d sling one arm around his waist until he returned the embrace. I was getting scarily good at reading him. It was like working on an intricate puzzle, and every new achievement was rewarded with a deeper, longer look into his mind.
I carefully stored away every casual anecdote about someone from work or his godson or his mother, and I loved to watch the life burn bright in his eyes. Of course, they were all happy stories. I could sense the bittersweet aftertaste they left in his mouth, but he never let me inspect it too closely. In turn, I regaled him with tales of my own, of my sister and my parents, of my cat that was perpetually falling asleep on top of me. I told him all the easy, palatable things, holding back just as much as he did, always careful to maintain the wall of superficiality.
But things did slip through the cracks every once in a while, from both of us-- they were bound to, what with the sheer amount of time we spent together in various states of undress. Things that made me burn with curiosity that couldn’t be sated without jeopardising the very foundation of our arrangement. So I turned a blind eye to the jagged scars on his thigh and neck when he failed to maneuver to hide them; in return, he kept mum when I walked into his apartment, on the day of my worst professional disaster, with runny makeup and bloodshot eyes, shivering all over.
If he noticed that I kissed the skin over his scars a little more tenderly, lavishing attention on him the first time I saw them, he didn’t show it. If he liked the way I always nuzzled my face into the one on his neck when we were done, he didn’t show it.
For my part, I tried very hard not to read into the slow, shallow thrusts or the almost reverent way he handled me when my tears still hadn’t dried. I definitely did not read into the arm over my shoulder or the slightly baffled crease in his brow while we sat on his couch with a random episode of The Office.
And if, maybe, the frequency of his visits increased as the months went by, who could blame him? He was an FBI agent. He probably had a lot of bad days.
Sometimes, though, I’d go over when I’d had a good day and I felt like celebrating. Sometimes, I’d knock on his door just because I was bored and I wanted to see him. It wasn’t as if he would know the difference. Our bodies knew how to be around each other, and that was all that mattered.
This was just stress relief, after all.
(“Have you ever been in love?” I asked him once, abruptly, my heart still pounding as the sweat cooled on our skins.
He glanced at me warily, but he must have detected only honest curiosity on my face, not lovesickness or anything else that would have had him running for the hills.
He chewed on his lip for a moment. “Once.”
“What happened?” My finger traced an aimless pattern on his chest.
“She loves me,” he said, “but she isn’t in love with me.”)
We never articulated any feelings we may or may not have about each other or our situation. We dodged sincere conversation like it would kill us. So all the pieces we owned of each other were ones that we had been remiss in guarding diligently. That only made them all the more precious.
But on the heels of every stolen glance, there was a moment where he looked right through me, where I felt blank and insubstantial, like I was a placeholder for something or someone, and that would be enough for the wall to be between us again, rigid and unrelenting.
It was a shame that I was stupid enough to hold on to the scraps that fell through anyway.
.
(iii)
I was an immensely stupid person.
That was the only explanation for why I was leaning against the outer wall of our apartment building at three in the morning, desperately shoving my hands into my coat pockets to brace against the cold.
“You don’t have to be here.”
Can he read minds now? I wondered sullenly. Spencer was sitting on the front steps, with his head in his hands. His hair was dishevelled, and his eyes were the picture of torment. I would have loved to console him, but every attempt so far had been firmly rebuffed.
He had knocked on my door an hour ago and silenced my greeting with a bruising kiss. Of course, I knew how to do that dance, but Spencer had been off his rhythm tonight. When I’d reached for his shirt, he’d pushed my arms away. When I had kissed his jaw, he'd flinched. When I’d finally retreated in concern to ask him what was wrong, he had huffed out that he was perfectly fine, before trying to lift my shirt over my head.
I’d pushed him onto the bed and tried to distract him, and he had responded by clenching the sheets in his fists instead of grabbing my hips. I’d whispered his name in his ear the way he usually loved, and he’d climbed out from under me, sitting up on the bed with his chest heaving. At that point, I’d given up. What had followed was an exercise in patience.
(“Spencer, what’s wrong?” I’d asked again, to no avail.
“It’s nothing. I don’t want to talk about it,” he’d gritted out, glaring at me.
I’d sighed. “Okay, which is it? Nothing, or that you don’t want to talk about it?”
Silence.
“Well something is clearly bothering you. Am I just supposed to ignore that?”
“We don’t need to talk about anything.” He’d tried to kiss me again. That time, I was the one who pushed him away.
“No, Spencer, this isn’t working. I don’t think we should do this tonight.”
The glare had intensified. “Fine.” He’d gotten up and tried to put his shirt back on, but his hands were shaking.
Cursing my investment in this man, I’d helped him while he stared daggers at me. When he’d hunted down his shoes and made his way out of my apartment, I’d pulled on my coat and followed, petting my cat briefly when he tried to follow us.)
So now we were outside, experiencing the most awkward silence ever known to man. Every time I attempted to put a hand on his shoulder or sit beside him, he would tense up yet again.
“Yes, Spencer,” I replied at length, “I do. You look like you might accidentally walk into traffic. I’m not leaving.”
“It’s not your problem.” The petulance was beginning to get on my nerves. I hadn’t signed up for sleepless weeknights.
“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” I told him, shrugging.
I pulled out my phone to distract myself with the cute animals in my game. Spencer was still worryingly silent. But if he didn’t want to talk to me and he wouldn’t let me near him, there was little I could do but stand there.
Every now and then, his breathing would hitch, and I would study him out of the corner of my eye. Whether he fully registered my presence or not, I was unsure, but he seemed to be calming down. He looked less on edge, his eyes less wild, and I was about to approach him and try again, when a black car pulled up just ahead of us.
Both our heads jerked to attention, but the petite blonde who exited the car only had eyes for Spencer.
“Spence!” She rushed to him, pulling him into a hug that he slowly reciprocated. “Your phone is off. After what happened, I was so worried,” she murmured into his hair, her eyes shut in relief.
And Spencer-- Spencer’s face was something to behold. His eyes were tightly closed, his lips turned down unhappily, and his face was so naked and open that I almost looked away. Almost. The pain that shone there riveted me. I felt as if I could see every wound he had ever suffered, in that instant. He’d never shown me that before. And he still hadn’t-- this wasn’t for me. The embrace broke, but his face stayed the same while the woman fussed over him.
Something came back to me, a fragment of a memory. She loves me but she isn’t in love with me. Unbidden, a sound of realisation escaped my throat, drawing two pairs of eyes to the dark corner in which I had been so far obscured.
Spencer schooled his face back to some semblance of normalcy, and ran a hand through his hair.
“Uh, JJ, this is--”
“Leaving,” I blurted out, then cleared my throat. “I was just leaving. Work in the morning. Nice to meet you.” I tried to smile at her, but it felt more like a pained grimace.
I brushed past both of them, but hesitated on the top step. “Spencer…”
His gaze was inscrutable, and I was too tired to try to decipher it.
“Feel better,” I mumbled, and then I left them there.
*~*
I was not sulking.
I told myself this as I lounged on the couch in my most comfortable pyjamas, stuffing my face with junk food and watching Michael Scott lament his foot injury.
So what if Spencer was in love with a beautiful blonde while getting him to talk to me was like pulling teeth? It wasn’t like I’d been carrying a torch for him. We were just extremely compatible sexually. And in very close proximity to each other. That put us in the ideal position to hook up whenever we needed it. That was the extent of our relationship. For all I knew, he’d been sleeping with other people this whole time. I hardly had the right to protest it if he had. We hadn’t set up rules. We just fell into bed together as and when we liked.
It was a good, uncomplicated thing.
So I needed to make sense of whatever needless jealousy I was feeling, before I ruined it. I couldn’t sit around being pathetic. I had a life.
There was a knock on the door.
Sighing, I turned off the TV and put the snacks away. Spencer was quiet as I let him in. His eyes roamed the small living room as if he didn’t know his way around my place as well as he did his own. I perched on the arm of the couch and stared at him, hoping my face didn’t betray the rollercoaster of emotions I’d experienced over the last forty-eight hours.
“So,” I started, “you okay?”
He looked a bit startled, as if he hadn’t expected me to address it at all. I tried not to roll my eyes.
“Yeah. I’m alright.”
“Do you want to tell me what happened?” I prompted, “It was pretty intense.”
“It-uh, it was a work thing. JJ helped me out.”
Of course she did. “Great,” I said aloud.
We looked at each other for a beat. “She’s the one, isn’t she?” I blurted before I could stop myself.
“What?”
“The one you’re in love with?”
There was a telltale spot of red high on his cheeks, even as he sputtered. “That’s not-- I mean, yes, but that was--”
“It’s fine,” I said cheerily. “I was just curious.”
He frowned at me. “She’s my best friend, it’s not--”
“No, I get it.” My stomach was somewhere near my feet. “So, do you wanna fuck?”
Again, he seemed taken aback. “What?”
“Isn’t that why you’re here?” I directed my gaze at his meticulously polished shoes.
“No.” A pause. “I just wanted to say-- would you look at me for a second?”
I forced myself to comply.
“I, uh, I wanted to thank you. For staying with me the other night.” The sincerity in his eyes was a bit too much to bear at the moment.
I hadn’t done anything, and I told him as much.
“You didn’t have to. Just being there was more than enough.”
“Right,” I said hollowly. “So is that it?”
“Yeah.” He seemed very lost. “Um, are you okay?”
“Sure. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“You’re acting kind of strange.”
“That’s because there isn’t usually this much talking,” I snapped.
I longed to smooth out the lines on his face and make him feel at ease again. This was supposed to be the good, uncomplicated thing. He was apparently making an effort. I could return the favour.
“I’m sorry,” I said, letting out a deep breath and rubbing a hand over my face. “Can I get you something to drink? We can talk about it if you want. Or just hang out.” I tried to squash down the hope that bloomed in my chest.
“Oh. Sure, if that’s okay.” He was chewing on his lip again, and it was unfairly appealing.
And so he stayed. I got two mugs of coffee, and when I came back, he was on my couch reading a well-worn paperback, as if he belonged there. I had to agree with the thought. When he heard me enter the room, he looked up with a smile.
When he left three hours later, I couldn’t remember what we’d talked about or the name of the book he’d abandoned within minutes, but I remembered the way he’d leaned close to me while gesturing wildly with his hands, and I remembered that we hadn’t touched beyond accidental brushes of our fingers the entire time.
He still hadn’t revealed the source of his despair, and I knew there was someone he loved. I knew whatever this was, it would be temporary.
But the smile on my face as I closed the door was real.
.
(v)
Spencer kept coming over. I was never given the chance to initiate contact because it seemed like he was always at my place. Whenever he was in the city, he would be with me. I started to worry about his apartment gathering cobwebs from the disuse. But I couldn’t honestly complain about this new development.
Sometimes we had sex, and sometimes we didn’t. Sometimes he came in sore and tired, other times he was brimming with excitement with a playful grin. Sometimes he was angry at the world and I was allowed to coax him down from his rage. Those nights were in turn infuriating and thrilling.
(“What happened?”
“Work.”
“That’s really helpful, Spencer, care to elucidate?”
“No.”
“Okay, caveman.”
“Shut up and take off your clothes.”
I’d rolled my eyes and complied.)
I enjoyed every bit of him. I wanted to observe and chart every one of his moods and his little quirks. I loved the small pile of his books that had found their way onto the coffee table. I loved introducing him to pop culture that he approached with the same diligence as he would a textbook of quantum physics. He was an eager student, and I attempted to return the favour whenever he launched into his obscure tirades.
Some nights I would drowsily let him in and he would crawl into bed with me, fully clothed. The following mornings, I would wake up with a silly grin on my face, seeing him utterly relaxed and at peace. We’d have breakfast in my kitchen and slowly come awake together over our steaming mugs of coffee.
It was fun, learning him.
In the dead of night, as I was drifting off to sleep, he would tell me bits and pieces of horrible things he’d had to see. All I could offer him then was a tight, protective embrace and a steady gaze as the words clawed their way out of his reluctant throat. It felt like he was giving me some sort of twisted boon, these revelations of his pain. I collected them just as carefully as I did everything else. If it was a part of him that was freely given, I knew I wanted it.
At intervals, I would have to remind myself that he wasn’t truly emotionally available. It wasn’t hard. I only had to picture JJ’s relieved smile and the raw uncloaked expression on his face that I had never seen again. He mentioned her every now and then, and I’d discovered that his godson was her child. He never seemed upset, talking about her family, but he wasn’t the kind of man who would resent another’s happiness, even if it was at the expense of his own. I knew that now. I still remembered the way he would pull away from me and flinch at my touch, and I knew I was playing a losing game. There was no way out of this where I didn’t get hurt. All I could do was try to control it.
Three months after that night outside our building, I knew I’d fallen for him.
I was in trouble and I needed to do something about it, quickly. So I stopped preemptively cancelling plans with my friends and coworkers. I joined a book club. I called in a guy to loudly fix my bathroom sink the day I knew Spencer would be getting home. I even got a gym membership. I tried to be away from home as much as I could.
Whenever Spencer texted me, I would let him know I was unavailable. His texts got progressively more frustrated. Watching the excitement on his face dim when I turned him away at my door was painful. But it was necessary. I convinced myself that when Spencer and I stopped existing in this vacuum without other people, my feelings would weaken and I would be able to get him out of my head.
It didn’t work, of course, and I spent every day missing him. I tried to distract myself with work and my suddenly-full schedule, but the feelings were still there. Try as I might, I couldn’t stop thinking of him every morning and every night, and every time I passed his door and every time I walked by a bookstore.
So when Neil from work asked me out a week later, I said yes.
I wore a nice dress and heels, and he picked me up. We went to a midscale restaurant and talked about boring first-date things, and I knew within the first fifteen minutes that I didn’t want to see him again. I went through the motions, smiled pleasantly at him, and told him I would take a cab home. When I walked dejectedly up to my apartment, it took me a second to realise what I was looking at. My heart leapt and I dropped my keys.
Spencer was sitting on the floor outside my door, and he looked tireder and older than I’d ever seen him. He had looked up at my approach. I froze.
“Spencer.” I hadn’t seen him in a month.
He looked me up and down, and there was an unhappy tilt to his mouth. I wanted to kiss it away. He reached for the keys and rose to his feet.
“Hi.” He held them out to me, and I wanted to laugh and the eerie reflection of our first meeting.
��Hi,” I echoed.
“Were you on a date?”
There was no point in lying to him. “Yes.”
He looked away, his jaw clenching.
Silently, I unlocked the door and held it open. After a moment’s hesitation, he walked in.
He paced the floor of my living room. I took off my shoes and put my keys on the table, waiting for him to speak. I felt out of sorts and unprepared for what was to come. Even when I heard him come to a halt, I didn’t lift my gaze to meet his.
“Why would you-- I thought we had something.” His tone was heavy with accusation.
I stared back at him in challenge. “Sure. We had something. But I didn’t want to fool myself into thinking it was more than it was.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Us! You. You send me all these mixed signals, and I know you’re still hung up on someone else but I let myself get in too deep anyway. I had to protect myself.”
“I’m not hung up on someone else,” he shouted, raising his hands in frustration.
“Of course you are!” I matched his volume. “You told me so yourself.”
“When did I do that?” He sounded honestly bewildered.
“A few months ago. You said you were in love with someone but she didn’t love you back. And then I saw you with JJ that day. I know it’s her. It’s okay. You didn’t promise me anything.”
Feeling drained, I wrapped my hands around my middle. The tears were threatening to fall, but I tried to hold them at bay. This would be over soon. It all would.
“JJ--” he barked out a laugh, surprising me.
“What about this situation is funny to you?” I demanded.
“No, listen--”
“You’re hot and you’re cold. You kick me out right after our first time and then you’re sweet the next day. How do you want me to feel about that?”
“I’m sorry about-”
“Trying to talk to you is impossible! I want to help you. But you clearly don’t want to talk to me!”
“That’s not--”
“And then you’re over here all the time, and I get that it’s because you want to distract yourself, but you have to know how it would con--”
“God, would you just shut up and listen to me for once?”
I glared up at him. He was undeterred, a strange glint in his eyes.
“I love you,” he informed me, striking me dumb. “It took me a while to realise it, but it’s true. I love you.”
All I could do was gape at him as he walked closer to me and took my tightly clenched fists in his hands. “I’m sorry if I made you feel like I was holding back. I’m trying to be better. And I don’t know what you thought you saw between me and JJ,” he said very slowly, stroking his thumbs gently over my palms, “but all that’s there is a lot of trauma and shared experiences. Yes, I thought I loved her once, but that was a long time ago. We’ve never-- she’s not you.”
Traitorously, that tendril of hope began to coil around my heart again as I searched his face, looking for a trace of a lie.
I found none.
I surged forward, crashing my lips to his with no finesse and too much force, but he was ready for me, releasing my hands and cradling my waist instead. I gripped his hair, letting the tears spill at last, an overjoyed laugh bubbling out of my throat and into his mouth. I let my hands roam the hard plane of his body, the delicious ripple of wiry muscle beneath his shirt, the hidden softness that only I could feel.
“I love you,” I told him when we broke apart for air. “I’m glad I can tell you, I love you, I fucking love you.” Spencer grinned down at me, and the look was so fond I had to kiss him again.
The rest was a blur of hastily discarded clothes and the steadfastly ignored pain of knocking into furniture before we finally found my bed and tumbled into it.
(“All this time, I could have had you,” I groaned into his ear while he thrust his fingers into me, mouthing along my jaw.
“You have me,” he promised into my skin an eternity later, when he was inside me and my nails were scrambling for purchase along his back, my vision going white.)
That night, there were no painful confessions or taunting insecurities. There were just the two of us, blissfully entwined together, and the deepest of dreamless sleeps. Somewhere in the middle of falling out and falling back together, we had found our new rhythm.
.fin.
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fanfic-scribbles · 3 years
Text
Crash Pad
Fandom: MCU Captain America/Avengers
Summary: You’re just minding your own business when the Winter Soldier crashes into your life. Literally.
Quick facts: Romance – established past Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes leading into Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes/Reader – Nondescript Reader
Warnings: Fluff, slight mention of blood
Words: 7801
A/N: I started writing this a few months ago and almost finished when my life got fairly shook up. Still, I’m quite proud of being able to eke out an ending. For anybody who only cares about this story, feel free to skip this note, but for anybody following my other stuff: writing is going to be slow for the time being. My mom died and things are pretty topsy-turvy right now. Writing is still a comfort, but head to hands isn’t working the same right now. Thanks for your patience; I hope this is a pleasant read for you in the mean time <3
  ~
 You’re getting ready for bed and have just turned off the living room light when you hear a clatter on the fire escape. You haven’t gotten over to shut the window yet and you wince at the thought of maybe coming face to face with a giant rat, or a raccoon, although you haven’t yet seen a raccoon and you’re pretty sure they don’t live in the city but it would probably be better than a rat the size of a raccoon–
What you get is much, much worse as a fully grown man falls through the curtains, knocks over a side table and potted plant, and crashes onto your living room floor with a wheezed (but emphatic), “God damn it!”
You freeze, unsure of whether to run or yell or maybe both. However the man flounders on the floor, unable to otherwise move much as he holds his side and– is that blood on your floor?
“Are you okay?” you ask despite everything.
He yanks his head back to look at you and grimaces. “Fuck, I–” He tries to get up, slips in what you are almost positive is blood, and slumps over with a little sigh and a handful of muttered curses that might be in another language. “I am really sorry about this,” he says lowly, like he's embarrassed to be bleeding out in a stranger’s living room. Then he shifts a little more and moonlight gleams on his arm. His very…shiny…completely metal arm, and you find a whole new way to be concerned.
You should have known the reasonable rent was a goddamn trap.
You take a few steps back, barely avoid hitting the counter, and flick the light back on without taking your eyes away from the man on your floor. He squints at the brightness and shows you a face that is, both fortunately and unfortunately, familiar. Fortunately because Captain America and the Avengers somehow got him pardoned for potential war crimes and treason even without him being present for any of that circus of a trial. Unfortunately because…war crimes. And treason. And that is definitely blood.
“I’m sorry,” he blurts out and looks a little woozy. “There were sheets– I thought the building was empty.”
“The sheeting is for the building right next to us,” you say and sigh. “I’m going to guess you are not in favor of me calling an ambulance?”
He just blinks at you a few times. Maybe he is secretly a raccoon.
“Please don’t,” he says, some life returning to his eyes, and he looks you up and down. The rubber duck pajamas must put him at ease because, while he is still tensely holding his midsection, his shoulders relax a little. “I’m so–”
“Sorry, yes, I know.” You point at the bathroom. “I’m going to get the first aid kit and hopefully I won’t have to explain to the coroner’s office why Captain America’s boo bled out on my floor.”
You’re just opening up the cupboard that hopefully contains at least some band-aids when he calls out, “What the hell is a ‘boo?’”
~
Two old t-shirts, one and a half rolls of dusty gauze, and his own homemade stitch kit later, the man is finally all patched up. “How are you not passing out from blood loss?” you ask, eyeing the mess on the nice hardwood that has definitely just lost you your deposit. But there’s no corpse to deal with, so at least things aren’t as bad as they could be.
“I’m built pretty hardy.” He sits up a little more and groans. Before you can beg him not to split his side again, he extends his hand. “James Barnes. But you can call me Bucky.”
You shake his hand (gently) and tell him your name. “Do you let everybody call you Bucky, or just the people whose floor you bleed all over?” Something moving catches your eye and you sigh at the sight of your inexpensive (but still nice) curtains blowing slightly, showing off their new stains. “Floor and drapes…”
“I’ll clean it,” he says. “I can get blood out of anything.” He winces. “I…that sounds worse than it is.”
“I imagine getting blood out of anything is a good skill for an international spy-assassin to have,” you say.
Bucky scowls. And, you think, blushes a little, though how he has enough blood to do that you don’t know. You look at the spot again. It looks big to you but maybe you’re making a fuss over nothing. No, wait, there’s still dried blood on your floor. You’re allowed a fuss. “So you know who I am.”
“Your boy made it hard to miss,” you say.
He grumbles to himself, then says, “He’s always such a drama queen. I didn’t need to be pardoned.”
“Really,” you say and look at the bloodied handkerchief wrapped around a bullet he dug out of himself. “Looks like at least one other person disagrees with you.”
“This was Steve’s fight, not mine.” He huffs. “Story of my goddamn lif–”
He suddenly falls back and you reach out instinctively to catch him. He recovers quickly, wild-eyed and stiff and you scoot back just in case. He takes a few deep breaths and seems to force himself calm. It doesn’t look very effective and you’re honestly starting to worry. “You really–”
“I did not faint,” he snaps and maybe he has more blood than you thought, or maybe absolutely all of it has come to collect in his face.
“I was going to say you really need a hospital,” you say. “But yeah, you did.”
He grumbles under his breath and then, as if predicting your protests, stands up quickly enough to waver. Serves him right, you think, but when he scowls at you, you wonder if maybe he’s psychic too. “Try not to pass out on your way home,” you say, because if he wants to leave there’s really nothing you can do to stop him.
“Funny,” he says. He clears his throat and adds, much more sincerely, “Thanks.”
For the t-shirts, for the first aid kit, for not calling the cops, for not calling the Avengers so Captain America can hone in on him like a cartoon hound, for not bitching about the floor too much– the list is many and varied and so you give him a simple nod and hope you can get even a little bit of sleep tonight because work tomorrow is going to be hell without it.
He goes back to the window and before you can point out you have a perfectly good door, Bucky slips out onto the fire escape again. You shrug to yourself and go over to firmly flip the lock. You’ve done your part– in the event he slips and hits his head, someone else can be the good Samaritan. You’re going to bed and tomorrow this is going to feel like a weird dream, if there is even a single good deity in existence.
~
You’re not sure if it’s proof of or a mark against the existence of said single good deity when Bucky shows back up in your fire escape the next evening and taps politely against your open window before he lets himself back in, scooting your new plant just an inch out of the way.
“I have a door,” is the first thing that comes out of your mouth.
“Your hallway’s too well lit,” he says, much more hale and hearty and obviously not suffering major blood loss. His hair even looks like he just got out of the shower, all soft and shiny and bouncing a bit as he twists his upper body to start pulling stuff out of a backpack hanging off one shoulder. “I got stuff to clean the floor, and a replacement first aid kit. You outta keep it better stocked, so I got you one of the good ones.”
“O…kay,” you say, for lack of anything better. There’s a hysterical laugh building up in the back of your throat as the Winter Soldier brings out some rags and a cleaning solution for your bloodstained hardwood floor, but you cough it out and say, “Thanks,” when the formerly-feared international assassin looks at you like you’re crazy before he gets on his hands and knees and starts scrubbing.
It’s not fair no one would believe you. You’re not quite sure this isn’t an elaborate daydream, but then, you like to think you’d imagine something more fun than this. You clear your throat. “Would you like something to drink?”
“No thanks,” he grunts, glaring at the floor and rubbing at the stain like it has offended him personally. It’s a little worrisome when he goes at it hard enough to maybe rub a hole right through the floor– you’d rather deal with the stain– but there’s a hard edge to his eyes that make you think maybe it’s a good idea for him to work it out in a productive, non-violent way. And if it turns violent, hopefully he has some home repair skills to make up for it.
You busy yourself with making tea, using the nice pot and the nice cups you never get to break out, and by the time it’s almost done steeping Bucky isn’t rubbing quite so hard and, in fact, seems to have made the stain do a disappearing act.
“Nice,” you say. “You want some tea? I made plenty.”
He lifts his head and tilts it as he squints at you, like he’s still not sure of you. But he shrugs, says, “Sure,” and stands up, rolling his shoulders. He looks down at the floor and nods appreciatively before coming to sit on the other side of the counter. “It’s almost gone; just a little bit more and it’ll be like I was never here.”
That last part could have been a decent joke, but he said it so seriously you just clear your throat. “Thanks,” you say and start pouring. “My landlord is going to have to find some other excuse to try and keep my security deposit.”
Bucky snorts but otherwise makes no noise. At first it’s nice, if a bit awkward, as you don’t really feel the need to fill the silence, but it becomes clear by the way Bucky glares at the plant sitting in front of him on the counter that something is eating at him. You’re not sure whether or not to pry, but it seems polite to at least ask, “Are you okay?”
“Fine,” he grunts and leans even lower to the surface of the counter.
You stare at him. “I appreciate what you did, but you didn’t have to come back,” you say gently, because a pissed-off former-assassin isn’t really a problem you want to have on your hands. “I’m not awful enough to actually expect you to clean up your own blood the day after you nearly bled to death.”
“What?” He blinks and then scowls and shakes his head. “No, it’s not that; it’s…” He picks up his cup and downs all of it, despite the fact that it was still steaming. Tentatively you pour him another cup, to which he says, “thanks,” before loading it with sugar again. “It’s good,” he says and this time he sips it.
“It’s one of my favorites. Very soothing,” you say. “Normally.”
Bucky rolls his eyes. “I wish anything was soothing. You know Steve almost ran into a goddamn minefield today?”
You didn’t know that, you don’t think anything the Avengers do is any of your business, really, and where does one even find a minefield in New York City– you don’t say any of that, but you apparently don’t need to, because Bucky is off like a shot saying more words than you’d have thought possible for him. All of it is ranting about what a reckless dumbass Captain America is, and a Brooklyn accent increasingly comes through, egged into existence by sheer aggravation. You sit and listen, transfixed not so much by the details (they’re too fleeting and sparse) but by how annoyed Bucky is with Captain Amer- with “Steve goddamn pain in the ass Rogers” and you’re never going to be able to see him again without snickering.
Bucky sighs heavily and rests his chin on the table. He looks very tired, all of a sudden. Maybe a relaxing tea and enthusiastic rant wasn’t the best combination. Then again, he also looks less tense, so perhaps it’s fine. “Why don’t you stop for the night and go get some sleep,” you say and take away his cup. “You can finish up tomorrow.”
He squints at you, squints back at the floor (that you honestly can’t tell is any different from the rest), and looks back at you. “You don’t mind?”
“Not at all,” you say and stack the cups. “When you come back refreshed you can tell me why Steve Rogers can never walk past that animal shelter without ducking his head in shame.”
Bucky’s smile is lopsided and he shakes his head. “Maybe,” he admits and hops off the chair. “I’ll just…leave the stuff here then, if that’s okay?”
You nod and he quickly picks up and puts the supplies in the empty bottom space of your side table. He goes for the window.
“I have a-!”
And he’s gone. You roll your eyes. If Steve Rogers really is as much of an asshole as Bucky says he is, then those two deserve each other.
~
For all that the Captain America mythos has been debunked for you, you’re still brought up short when you suddenly encounter Steve Rogers the next night.
On your fire escape.
He knocks his head against the railing in his scramble to simultaneously get up and face you, curses, and lifts his hands defensively. “I can explain.”
You rub your face with both hands. They definitely deserve each other. “I doubt that,” you mutter and sigh heavily. Thank goodness there haven’t been any actual fires; you don’t know how you’d get out with all these buff superheroes hanging around outside your window. “Have you lost something?”
Captain America looks at the ground for a moment, and then flashes you a smile. “…Yes?”
God, he is a smartass. “Do you want to come inside or do you want to risk some Nosy Nancy from the building across the street seeing a big shadow and calling the cops?”
That would never happen, but he slips inside almost immediately and then there he is, in all his uniformed, shield-holding glory. It’s too weird to think about, and you step back to give him (and you) space while you close the curtains. “Thank you,” he says politely and looks around. “Your apartment is lovely; it’s very…green.”
You’re not sure why he hesitates, until you see him looking at your yellowing majesty palm. “He’s coming back,” you say and go to adjust the plant for lack of anything else your nervous hands can do. “Would you like something to drink?”
“No thank you,” he says and stands with his feet shoulder wide and his hands clasped down in front of him. It is perhaps the least comforting thing he can do and for one ridiculous moment you wish Bucky was here to be in between you. You wish the Winter Soldier was here. To protect you. From Captain America.
You clear your throat. “So,” you say and grab yourself something. “Do you lurk outside everyone’s apartment at some point, or am I just special?”
For all his military posturing, Captain America squirms like a schoolboy. “I swear I wasn’t– okay, I guess I was but not intentionally? I was…looking. For something.”
“Something you dropped?” you ask him.
“A person,” he says, staring elsewhere. For a moment you have a paranoid thought he’s staring at the space where Bucky had fallen in that night, but no, he’s just looking at the window. At least you remembered to change the curtains.
“Pretty sure you can see one of those without squinting into the grates,” you say.
“He might have passed through on his way somewhere else,” Captain America says. “Have you seen a man outside?”
“Other than you?” you ask. He blushes even harder than Bucky does– and think of the devil, you have a moment where you’re not sure what you should say, but quickly come to realize that whatever is going on between the two of them, you do not want to get stuck in the middle.
You’re prepared to lie your ass off, but he apparently takes your response as a rebuke. “I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to make you feel unsafe.”
“It’s fine,” you say. Despite his previous answer, you lean into the fridge to get him a bottle of water. “I’m pretty sure Captain America isn’t going to murder me. And if you decided you wanted to, well, there’s nothing I could really do about it.”
He chokes on the drink he’s just taken. You instinctively lean in so you can slam his back but after a couple of hits he covers his mouth and waves you off. “Sorry, sorry,” he says and grabs a nearby dishcloth to wipe up what he just spit on the counter. “That was just…really dark.”
“I guess it’s a good thing I’m not the one lurking on fire escapes,” you say.
He rolls his eyes. The nerve. You laugh and he actually grins. Asshole. His smile softens though and he says, “I’m really–”
“Sorry,” you finish for him.
“Am I that predictable already?”
You shrug. You want to tell him it’s because he and Bucky seem very much alike in that respect. You want to but…you don’t. Whatever Bucky’s problem is, he seems to want to deal with it himself, and it’s not your place to get in between them and start snitching. “You seem the type. Don’t worry about it so much. You…look pretty worried. I’m not going to hold it against you.”
“Thank you.” His lips turn into a sad sort-of smile and he takes a slower drink. “I guess I am pretty worried. This man I’m looking for, he’s…important to me, and he’s been through a lot, and I just want to know he’s okay.”
You stare at him. He looks down. And looks down. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to babble like that,” he says and glances at you with a strained smile. “I don’t normally do that.”
“Hm.” You stare at him for several seconds and notice he is blinking an awful lot. “You look exhausted.”
“I’m a little tired,” he says, quietly, and some of the posturing seeps out of him and he lets himself slump a little more. He suddenly shakes his head and sits up straight again. “Thanks again for…” He looks around and settles for shaking his water bottle.
You hold back a laugh. “Sure. I uh…do you need me to call you a cab?”
He shakes his head firmly and, to his credit, he’s pretty excellent at pretending to be okay. You almost believe him. “I can get home all right.”
“Well, please make sure you do. I can think of a lot of people who’d be sad to think of you collapsing on the way home because you wore yourself down to the bone,” you say. “And from how you seem to worry about your friend, I bet you can think of at least one.”
He blinks, like he’s surprised, but a smile curls onto his face, warm and true. “Good night,” he says, and because you’re so nice, you don’t stop him when he goes back out the window. At this point, it’s beginning to feel like a lost cause.
~
“What did you say to him?”
“I know you don’t like the door,” you say, not even turning away from the plant you’re watering. Any time you put down the canister you forget where you left off and you are not going to kill these plants by overwatering. Not again. “But maybe you could at least tap on the window when you decide you’re going to enter my apartment.”
“Why do you leave your window open?” Bucky huffs. You can hear him sit at the counter behind you. “You know what kind of creeps can take advantage of that?”
You finish watering the last plant and turn to stare at him. “I’m starting to get an idea.”
Bucky scowls. “I’m not a creep,” he mutters.
“Polite society encourages doorways instead of windows,” you say. “It’s okay. Captain America, apparently, is also a creep.”
Bucky sits up straighter. “What did he say?”
“Not much,” you say. “He was squatting on the fire escape like he could make you spontaneously materialize. I invited him in for an explanation and after a little while he went on his way.”
“After a little while,” Bucky repeats and squints at you suspiciously.
You shrug. “He likes to vent to complete strangers, apparently. But I didn’t tell him anything about you, it doesn’t seem fair to tell you anything about him. If you want to know, I get the feeling you can go ask him.”
Bucky rolls his eyes but he stands up and stretches. “You said I bled on the drapes?”
“I already scrubbed that out, if you can finish the floor,” you say and go for the tea pot. “Do you like green tea?”
“As long as you do it right,” he says and starts scrubbing again. “I hate it all bitter.”
You go for the good matcha and start preparing it while he works out his frustrations on your floor. You glance at him a couple of times but he seems fully focused on his task, until you finish the tea and call him back to the bar.
“Steve Rogers is a pain in the ass and don’t let anyone tell you different,” he grumbles, but it’s soft and there’s a troubled look on his face as he takes his cup.
“Do you miss him?” you ask and blow gently across your drink.
Bucky shifts uncomfortably. Just as you're about to apologize for overstepping, though, he speaks. “It’s hard to go back when you’ve done the shit I have, you know?”
No. You have absolutely no idea what it’s like to live as a free man after decades of literal objectification and being used as a murder weapon for fascists. But it doesn’t seem very helpful to say that, so instead you say, gently, “I can’t even imagine.”
Bucky bobs his head and takes another sip of his drink. You’re delighted he seems to be drinking it fairly quickly, but also a little dismayed because a good matcha latte takes a decent amount of work and it’ll take a little time if he wants another cup. “I want to go back but I can’t yet. I wish he wouldn’t be so goddamn stubborn about it is all. Just because he thinks I didn’t do anything wrong doesn’t make it true.”
You nod, like any of this makes any goddamn sense to you. But maybe– maybe it doesn’t have to. Maybe Bucky’s saying all this because you’re an outside entity with no personal stake in, or knowledge of, what counts as treason, or what’s needed to lack culpability, or what it means to be an absent friend.
He rambles, a little bit, and though about half the words are proper nouns you don’t recognize, you nod along, and when he finishes his latte you make him another one, and when he leaves, you don’t mention the door. Even though you want to.
~
You’ve actually forgotten how nice it is to have someone come through the door. Case in point–
“Um, I hope this is all right,” Steve Rogers, dressed in casual civilian fare and holding a small pot of flowers, says as you can do nothing but stare at him. “I just wanted to stop by and thank you again for being so understanding. May I…come in?”
That snaps you out of your funk and you quickly stand aside. “Of course; sorry, I just…wasn’t expecting you.”
“I was just going to leave the plant with a note if you weren't here, but I’m glad you were,” Captain Rogers says and walks in, and sets the pot down on the counter.
You walk over to the fridge. “Would you like something to–” As you turn to finish the question you see him glance furtively at the window. Ah, of course. He looks down guiltily and you can’t help but roll your eyes and laugh. Well, he did come through the correct entrance and brought some pretty flowers. “All right, you did knock on the door this time; go sniff around the fire escape all you want.”
“I’m just checking something I forgot,” he says quickly and goes to the window. He’s only outside long enough for you to brew some tea and he comes back in just as you’re pouring his cup. It isn’t until he’s about to take a sip, however, that he says, “Oh– I know it looks bad, but Bucky– sorry, James Barnes– I swear he isn’t dangerous.”
“I know. I saw some of the trial stuff,” you lie. Well, you did see some of it, but it wasn’t until you heard Bucky mutter “Martha Stewart was right,” while fussing at some of the blood on his shirt that you felt safer. Strange as it is to think.
Steve relaxes his shoulders like some of the weight is off of them. “You have no idea how good that is to hear. You wouldn’t believe some of the things people say to me. I can’t really punch people anymore because I’m so much stronger now but it’s so tempting sometimes. At least when it’s online I can mime punching them.”
His annoyed tone allows you to laugh a little. “Maybe imagine the block button is a punch in the face?” you suggest.
He grins. “My friend Clint suggested printing out the most irritating comments and taping them to a punching bag. It didn’t really work but the thought was nice. The block button as a punch to the face though…”
The guy doesn’t really need more violence in his life, but he genuinely seems pleased with the idea, so you let it be. And when he starts ranting in detail about some of the comments he gets about Bucky, you make a new pot of tea– chamomile. For the both of you.
~
You don’t know how the flowers are dead already– it seems like Steve just brought them and they were so pretty you immediately looked up care instructions and followed them to the letter. Or so you thought. But now, only days later, you have a pot of dirt and withered petals.
And Bucky sulking at your counter.
“I told him I was fine,” he says petulantly.
You sigh and bring the pot over to the sink and think about what to do. “Did you tell him in person?”
“In a letter. He knew it was from me.”
The soil looks nice, so you’ll dig out the remains and try to plant some replacement seeds. Maybe that was the problem– maybe the flowers were sick or something. “Well reading and seeing are two different things.”
“He knows I cover him in fights.”
You slowly look at Bucky. His oh-so intelligent response is to bristle like a cat and go, “What?”
You roll your eyes. “He’s desperate to see you, knows you’re near when he’s fighting, and you wonder why he’s “so goddamn reckless?’”
Bucky just glares. Yeah, these two morons absolutely deserve each other.
You hope Bucky figures it out sooner rather than later.
~
He doesn’t, but he keeps coming by, as does Steve, and you resign yourself to hosting two pining idiots who keep dancing around each other.
Bucky drinks anything you give him without complaint. However he drinks the lattes and almost anything green tea a little quicker, though he tries to hide his cup from you when he does. Whether he’s ashamed of going through them so fast or embarrassed you don’t know, but you start to give him bigger cups, and that seems to help.
The first time you give Steve a cup of apple pie spice, he gives you a severe glare– which he then completely undermines by liking the blend immensely.
“I swore the next person who offered me apple pie would get popped,” Steve says, an amusing mixture of half-bluster and half-shame as he sips from the classic teacup you hope not to regret handing him.
“Lucky for me it’s not actually apple pie,” you say. “Do people really make that joke?”
The eyeroll Steve gives that is 200% sass. “You have no idea,” he says, deadly serious, “–how funny people think they are.”
~
This becomes…oddly normal. Listening to Steve talk about anything that’s on his mind, giving Bucky new tea blends just to see how he reacts to them; your apartment is no longer just you and a bunch of greenery that seems to wilt more often than not. Everything seems warmer, and better– even your plants seem healthier. (For that, though, you suspect Bucky is giving them a special mixture of something after you catch a glance of him messing with one of the pots. You want to ask him what he’s doing, but you don’t want to admit that he’s better at taking care of them than you are.)
It’s so normal, that you feel the silence only after the first few nights without a visit. They don’t visit every night, but they visit often enough that you know they’re off somewhere even without them telling you. For a couple of weeks you try to pretend the quiet doesn’t bother you, but you check the fire escape twice every night, and then once more before you go to bed.
~
The next time you see Bucky is during one of these checks. There was no tapping, no noise to otherwise alert you, he’s just suddenly back, sitting next to the window, hunched over in black clothes nearly blending into the darkness and staring out at nothing in the night.
“What’s wrong?” you ask and crawl out to kneel next to him. “Are you hurt again?”
“No,” he mutters and continues to glare at some imaginary point in the distance. “Steve was, though.”
It’s a little harder to swallow. “Is he going to be okay?”
“Yeah,” Bucky mumbles and buries his mouth further against his arms. “He’s fine, strutting around the hospital like a- like a- …” He huffs and sits back to wave his arms before he curls back in on himself. “But it was close, and he’s an asshole.”
“Mm,” you say. “Chamomile mint?”
He sighs heavily but he gets to his feet and starts to enter, only to stop and hold open the curtains for you.
“Thank you sir,” you say with only a hint of sarcasm and go on ahead to get the tea started. Bucky snorts but doesn’t say anything and you use the time the water needs to heat up to take care of some of your plants.
“Stop it.”
The snap comes so fast from Bucky you immediately stop what you’re doing. He doesn’t look as angry as he sounded, but he’s frowning pretty hard. “You're overwatering that one; jade plants are succulents. You don’t need to drown it.”
You look at the plant and set the watering can down. “Oh.” You knew that. You think. You’re just nervous. “Did you see him? In the hospital?”
“Briefly. I didn’t talk to him; just made sure he was all right,” Bucky says. “And he is. I wouldn’t leave him if he wasn’t.”
That does assuage some of your concerns. Steve is nice. You want him to be okay. And Bucky is– also nice, but god, they’re both so fucking frustrating. “You couldn’t have just–”
“Don’t start with–”
“I’m just saying–”
“And I’m telling you not to say–”
“I pay the rent for all that you sublet my fire escape; I’ll say what I want,” you manage to finish to Bucky’s consternation. You lift your head proudly and he frowns to one side. And then he…smirks. You’re not sure you like that.
“Crappiest space in the city,” he says and sits up. “You could at least get a chair.”
You roll your eyes and dole out the tea, fixing it the way Bucky likes. No sugar for this one, but plenty of honey. “If I ever have to leave for an actual fire, I’ll be in enough trouble trying to get around you.”
“Nah. I’d carry you out,” Bucky says and lifts his cup in a silent ‘cheers.’ He takes a sip and the sigh sounds content, so you assume you did it right. For a few moments a comfortable silence settles between the two of you as you sip warm drinks surrounded by greenery (that is mostly green) and life goes on in faint sounds outside the confines of your home.
Bucky sets his empty cup down with a sigh. “Do you think, if I show up to throttle him, that he’ll actually start watching his own fucking back?”
You give that some serious thought. “Will you give him time to moon at you first?”
Bucky sighs with disgust and flumps back onto the counter. “This is stupid. This all feels so stupid.”
You open your mouth because you do have a lot of opinions about honest communication and using innocent civilian apartments to dance around each other, but Bucky shoots you a glare to let you know that a, he knows, and b, he doesn’t appreciate it. You roll your eyes and go back to drinking your tea. It is a very good blend, and you’re not going to let it go unappreciated because two early 20th century boys can’t get their shit together.
Not that you’re complaining, really– you’re starting to feel like less of a disaster by comparison. Or maybe letting two strange men into your apartment makes you just as bad by default. You rub the bridge of your nose. Yeah, no one is getting out of this looking sane. You feel like that should bother you more than it does, but it’s just a fleeting thought before you go back to worrying about Steve and pouring Bucky’s cup back to full.
~
The next night when someone knocks on your door, you’re only mildly surprised to see Steve on the other side. And most of that surprise is because you can see fading bruises on his face, and also because he is holding a fairly big potted plant with tall green and yellow-edged leaves.
“Hi,” he says and lifts the pot slightly. “I got you a present.”
“Uh, wow; thanks?” you say and quickly step back to let him in, momentarily forgetting he can probably carry it around with ease. Steve places the plant on the floor near the end of your couch, where it actually looks fairly nice. He gestures at it proudly. “It’s a snake plant. The man at the nursery said it’s very hard to kill.”
“You’re not funny,” you say but you look at it appreciatively. It is nice, and you could do with ‘hard to kill’. Speaking of– “Should you be up? You look like you should be in a hospital.”
He shrugs and his face goes neutral. “I’m healing well enough that there’s nothing a hospital could do for me. And I felt so…restless.”
You nod. “Want some tea?”
“Please. I really like what you make,” he says and immediately takes a seat at the counter. Oddly enough, it’s not the one Bucky always takes. You don’t realize you squint at the space for too long until Steve looks curious and asks, “Is everything okay?”
You squint at the countertop. “Yeah, just…trying to figure out if that’s a stain or a spot.”
Thankfully there is a spot of spilled something and you quickly grab a towel and wipe it away. You think it’s a pretty good save, but Steve looks at you with a raised brow, like he’s figured something out. You freeze. “What?” What are you going to say? How is he going to react? What will you–
“Was that a coffee ring?”
You blink a few times, and then roll your eyes as your chest practically deflates. He smiles and winks. “I can’t believe you.”
“I am a layered human being who can drink many things,” you say defensively. “And if you want coffee you’ll have to ask another time. I’m not giving you anything with caffeine in it when you look like you got hit by a truck.”
“Train,” he corrects absently. “It barely clipped me.”
You sigh and go for the sleepy blend. One of you is going to have to bow out of this conversation due to exhaustion and at this point you don’t care if it’s you. However it might truly come in handy as Steve keeps looking out the window and shaking his foot. You set the cup in front of him and before you can ask what’s wrong, he takes the cup in both hands and blurts out, “I think I saw him.”
You look at the window and squint. “Seriously?”
“Not here.” Steve rolls his eyes. Like you’re the crazy one. He blows gently across the surface of the liquid and says, “Though it’s strange you’d think I saw Bucky out of your window.”
“Isn't that why you started showing up here in the first place? I distinctly remember someone with a big red, white, and blue shield lurking on my fire escape.”
“Oh, right,” he admits sheepishly, hunched over his cup. His eyes glimmer with mischief as he looks up at you through long lashes and asks, “Did I ever apologize to you for that?”
You’re brought up short by the amount of boyish charm this giant walking wall of muscle manages to pack into that look and you have to find your tongue to say, “I– y-yeah…”
Steve chuckles to himself and you give yourself a mental slap on the face. “Troll,” you mutter and sip from your mug. The liquid is piping hot and burns your tongue, giving you an excuse to grimace when Steve flashes you a beautiful smile.
~
You’re in trouble.
Not physically, not immediately, and perhaps someone on the outside might say you’re being dramatic about it, but they wouldn’t know shit about the situation. They wouldn’t know about how your hands felt as they slid over Steve’s when he handed you a new small pot of flowers; they wouldn’t know about the feeling of serenity that settled over you when Bucky abandoned some of his oh so careful control and rested his head on your shoulder for four long seconds; they wouldn’t know how it feels like you’re missing something until someone shows up at your door or taps at your window.
You’re falling in love with two people who have always been, and still are, desperately in love with each other.
Isn’t that just your luck.
~
In the end, Bucky takes your advice more to heart than you ever expected he would– you and Steve are quietly enjoying each others’ company, with you standing in the kitchen and Steve sitting at the counter as per usual, when the curtains move dramatically for Bucky to slip in, which makes Steve whirl around, and your hands jerk so hard from all the sudden surprise that your cup slips out and crashes to the floor.
“Shi-” You forget to watch your step and immediately catch a jagged shard that embeds itself right under the ball of your foot. “Ow, fuck!”
Your name is said in different voices but very similar tones of alarm and you suddenly find yourself gathered into Bucky’s arms, bridal style, and he carries you over to the couch. “Wh-” You swallow at the close proximity to Bucky’s chest and the way he holds you so effortlessly but so securely. “I’m fine; it’s just a little–”
Bucky sits down on the couch and doesn’t move you, which means you are basically sitting cross-wise in his lap. This is not something you need after your recent revelation, and it doesn’t get any easier when Steve comes back with the heavy duty first aid kit Bucky got you and gingerly takes your foot to examine the injury. His sympathetic look towards you gives you the warning you need to brace yourself before he pulls the shard out. It doesn’t hurt too terribly and he’s almost tender as he cleans your foot.
“Look at us, matching blood and all,” Bucky says lightly.
“It’s my floor I’ll bleed on it if I want,” you grumble, but you’re too distracted by how focused Steve is on fixing you up. “You…seem to be taking this well.”
“I knew he had been here since the first time I came,” Steve admits as he rolls the gauze around your foot. “There was a bloodstain on your floor still.”
“Seriously?” You had thought Bucky was being overdramatic about the supposed stain and humored him, but it…makes sense. Why else would he come back the next night. Why else would Steve continue to come by. And because Steve had kept coming, Bucky had kept coming, and…they won’t need to come back anymore, will they? They now have what they’ve wanted. Each other.
Someone says your name and you force yourself back to neutral as much as you possibly can. Steve looks curious though and Bucky says, “What’s with that look?”
“There’s no look,” you say. “And if there is, it’s only because you two have devised the weirdest meet-cute ever– decades after you actually met.”
“Hm.” Bucky continues to stare at you, but doesn’t say anything else.
~
They come back. And they both use the door.
You don’t know what you’re more shocked by– that Bucky and Steve, having come back to each other, are still coming around to you, or that Bucky is actually walking through the designated threshold. You don’t have a lot of time to think about it though because the place is…a mess.
“What happened here?” Steve asks as Bucky’s shoulders go up to his ears and he looks around the place like he’s going to find something unpleasant.
“It’s not that bad,” you say and glance around. You’ve cleaned out a few of the pots already and stacked them away in the closet, but some of the plants are still…slightly alive, for a little while. A couple are even doing fairly well– one of which being the snake plant Steve got you.
“What happened to the jungle?” Bucky asks, looking around shrewdly. You don’t like the sound of that. It feels so…probing, and raises your hackles. Why should he care?
“I wasn’t keeping them alive for very long.” You flick a yellowing leaf and keep your tone light. “I just got tired of it. What are…what are you doing here?”
You don’t look at Steve, but he clears his throat and his tone is similar to Bucky’s when he asks, “Is now a bad time?”
“For what?” You square your shoulders and face them. Like an adult. Like an adult who had two other adults just sort of crash into their life one day and start sharing space until such time as the two window-crashers decided they…didn’t need to come around anymore. “I’m happy you both found each other. You didn’t have to come back.”
Steve looks…well, he looks hurt. You don’t know any other way to describe it; it doesn’t show in his face so much as in his eyes, in the feeling you get watching the line of his shoulders lower. But before he can say anything, before you can explain yourself, Bucky speaks up.
“It isn’t like that,” he says.
You look down. It’s easier than looking at a man who feels rejected, and a man who has you completely pegged.
“What?” Steve asks.
“It’s okay,” you say, in perhaps the biggest bald-faced lie you’ve ever told.
“That’s not– no,” Bucky insists and lifts your chin. His fingers are warm and gentle and linger too long.
You pull back from his touch before you can embarrass yourself further. “You guys were literally circling each other.”
“Please.” Bucky rolls his eyes. “I don’t need to keep coming back here to be near Steve. I know where he lives.”
“And I leave my window unlocked,” Steve says. He aims a cheeky grin at Bucky and adds, “Guess I should have left it open though.”
“Shut up,” Bucky tells him but looks at you and says, “Point is: we weren't using you.”
Steve blinks. “Oh– no, of course not!”
“It’s all right,” you say, trying as hard as you can to assuage their discomfort even though you can’t put much into it. Even though you did very much want this meeting to happen, somehow you don’t feel very ‘all right.’
“No,” Bucky says and takes your hand in his. The flesh hand, which he runs up to the middle of your forearm. His touch is gentle and light, even when he grips. You can break away, but you don’t– you let him pull you in, close and closer, until there’s barely any room between you.
Steve crowds from the side and puts one arm behind Bucky, and one arm behind you. “If you only think we’re here because of each other, then it’s not all right,” he says softly.
“I know it isn’t– I know you weren't ‘using’ m–” You swallow hard. “And I know it’s not–”
They both swoop in for a kiss– for a kiss with you. Somehow they avoid bumping heads and the lip-lip-lip contact is barely there, with Steve at the corner and Bucky barely catching one side of your upper lip, but they're both there for a glorious moment that leaves you stunned.
“Oh…” you say, dumbly. You try to fight it, but a smile pulls at your lips. “Oh.”
“That good already, huh?” Steve asks quietly, slowly forming a small smile of his own.
You let out a little sigh that is immediately undermined by an uncontrollable laugh that swells from a bubble of relief at the base of your throat. “Bucky’s right, you are insufferable,” you say but you reach out to sweep your fingers in a gentle touch down Steve’s cheek and under his chin.
“You get used to it,” Bucky says.
You think about that. Even with how you’ve been, entertaining these two rotating planets over the last however many weeks or months, this would be an entirely new normal.
You think you can’t wait to get used to it.
479 notes · View notes
bestofbucky · 3 years
Text
Eavesdrop
Pairings: Bucky x Reader
Word Count: 5.1k
Warnings: none really, enemies to ?
A/N: This is my first time posting something I have written. I hope you enjoy it! Thank you so much @tuiccim for your help, couldn’t have done it without you.
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Being an Avenger is tough. Of course, there are the obvious missions and kicking ass that are exhausting, especially because you don’t have any sort of enhancements or powers. You are just a regular human being, fighting with and against some not so regular human beings. Naturally when you have downtime, you spend it doing things with the least amount of effort. Watching Netflix, listening to music, taking baths, etc, meaning that your social life outside of the compound was, to put it simply, non-existent.
You had just returned from the worst date of your life, well, one of the top five worst dates of your life. Over the past couple of months Steve and Natasha had grown tired of you whining about being single but not making any effort to change it and began sending you on blind dates. Somehow, they managed five different times to find five completely awful people. This time they had set you up with Arthur, a recruit for SHIELD and a good one at that. You wouldn’t be surprised to see him on the elite squad soon, but when it came to your date, he was really blunt and inappropriate, and you had cringed your way through the entire thing.
Once you got back to the compound, you first went to your room to get changed into gym clothes for training with Nat, then headed to her room. On your way you passed one of the common rooms and heard two voices. One familiar but one you didn’t recognise, you decided to check it out and found Steve and another man.
Steve called your name inviting you over to them as they both stood up. ‘This is Bucky. He’s moving in today to begin training.’ Steve explains. You nod and smile at Bucky, remembering Steve told you about him and that he would be living here and eventually joining the team.
You have to stop yourself from gasping out loud at the sight of him. He is a 6 ft something hunk of muscle and beauty and you can’t stop yourself from trying to take him all in with your eyes.
Steve then introduces you to Bucky who looks in your eyes for all of two seconds to say, ‘hi’ before looking down at his feet. He is probably really nervous. Even from that two second glance, you could tell he had one hell of a past. They had you hooked already, you wanted to stare into those eyes and let them tell you the stories of the lifetime they had seen.
‘You were just in Wakanda right? How was it? I have only ever seen it in pictures but I really want to go.’ You let your excitement show, hoping to relax him a bit.
‘Yeah, it was nice. I was frozen for most of it though’ Shit, he curses himself. He didn’t mean to come across so rude but he was really nervous, you are really pretty and it is messing with his head a little. It doesn’t help that he has had to meet a lot of different people today and he is all socialised out. He sees your face fall slightly before you quickly compose yourself, any normal person would have missed it but he has his past of being a trained assassin.
‘Well, Nat is probably waiting for me, she told me she would show me some new moves today.’ You say realising that Bucky had probably been under a lot of stress lately and most likely just wanted to be alone, or with Steve rather than chatting to you, a stranger. At least you hoped this was the reason and it wasn’t that he already disliked you. Saying goodbye to the two of them you head off to Natasha’s room.
Not even bothering to knock, you walk into her room leaving the door open behind you, since you’ll be heading down to the gym soon anyway. Natasha is sitting on the end of the bed braiding her hair. ‘You almost ready?’ You ask.
‘Yeah, just got to finish my hair then put my shoes on.’ She tells you so you take a seat on her bed while you wait.
Meanwhile, Bucky told Steve that he wanted to go get his room sorted. Really it was just an excuse to be alone for a little while. On the way there he walked past a room with the door open and heard two voices talking, recognising them to be you and Natasha. He was just about to carry on walking to his room when he heard Natasha ask, ‘did you meet him yet?’
Bucky assumed she was talking about him and wanted to hear what you had to say. He hoped you would be understanding of his reticence after his taxing morning. 
‘Yeah, I met him today.’ You sigh and roll your eyes.
‘That bad?’ Nat asks, raising her eyebrows with a slight smirk on her face.
‘Yes, I tried to be as friendly as I could but he seemed like a jerk.’ You huff.
‘How so?’
‘He was so blunt he just came across really rude. I had high expectations, especially after hearing Steve say so many nice things about him.’
‘Maybe he was just having a bad day?’ She attempts a defence. 
‘Bad day or not, he should have the courtesy to smile and be polite even if it is fake.’
Bucky was so hurt to hear this. Yes, he wasn’t the nicest to you but your reaction seemed a bit dramatic. He didn’t want to hear you say any more so he rushed off to his room.
‘So, I guess you aren’t going to go on a second date with him then?’ Nat asks.
‘No, I really appreciate you and Steve trying to set me up but seeing as this is the 5th time and none of them were any good, I think I’ll go back to my old methods.’ You smile at her.
‘What, never putting yourself out there and waiting for the right person to just fall into your lap?’ Nat teases and you both laugh when you nod. She finishes tying her shoelaces and you head off to the gym.
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The next day you were leading a meeting of recruits who have the potential to be moved up into the squad that worked with the Avengers. The elite squad. Unfortunately for you, Arthur was in the group of recruits and was probably the next one to be promoted.  You finally dismissed everyone and started getting your stuff together to leave as well when Arthur came up to you.
‘What’s the word on who is moving up next, dove?’ You look up in shock, surely, he didn’t just call you dove.
‘Excuse me?’ You look him dead in the eye.
‘I said what’s the word on who is moving up next? I think you might need to get your hearing checked.’ He laughs at his own joke so you fake laugh with him.
‘That’s confidential., we’ll let everyone know when we have made the decision.’ You say and go to walk past him but he grabs your arm.
‘Does someone need a little convincing. If it’s you, then I can think of some ways.’ He whispers seductively in your ear. You pull your arm out of his grasp and frown at him.
‘I’m only joking, dove, come on, you can’t even take a joke?’ He laughs again.
You put on your best fake smile and your customer service voice. ‘There will be no convincing necessary. You are a good agent but you also have good competition. We will inform you all of our decision when it is made.’ You say and quickly turn and walk out the door before he can say anything else. When you get into the lift you ask FRIDAY where Steve is.
‘Common room A, Agent Y/L/N’. You make your way there as quick as possible. Heading around the corner, you slam into a solid object. You hiss at the contact on your fresh bruises, a frown appearing on your face. As soon as you look up to see what or who you bumped into, the frown quickly fades into a smile when you see its Bucky. He is already looking at you.
‘Sorry I should have been watching where I was going.’ He mumbles quickly.
‘No, it’s just as much my fault as yours. I shouldn’t have been in such a hurry.’ You apologise to him. As much as you would love to stay and chat  with  Bucky, you need to get to Steve to explain what just happened with Arthur and hopefully you can get him kicked off the team.
Bucky had left his room to try and find someone to help him figure out a few things with FRIDAY but as soon as he bumped into you that completely left his mind. You were all that filled his mind ever since he met you. He stood in the hallway for a while before realising he should ask you to help. Maybe this would be a good excuse to make up for his poor first impression. He heads in the direction you went but stops short when he hears your voice.
‘I think he bruised me. The dick.’ You say and Steve frowns at you ‘Come on, Steve. I’m  allowed to be angry. He has been nothing but a jerk to me,’ you explain and shift to get more comfortable.
‘What did you say to him when he did this?’ Steve asks, holding your arm and examining the newly formed bruises in the shapes of fingers.
‘I put on my best fake smile and pretended like everything was ok,’  You joke and Steve laughs, ‘as much as I hate the guy, I don’t have the confidence to actually show it.’ You sigh and Steve pulls your sleeve back down and leans back into the sofa. ‘Is there any way we can kick him off the team?’ You exaggerate batting your eyelashes at him.
‘He isn’t even on the team yet and you already want to kick him off?’ Steve questions.
‘Yes! I really don’t like him. I know he is your friend but I trust him about as far as I can throw him’ You explain and Steve nods.
Bucky had heard enough. He can’t believe you could be so horrible. You had the sweetest exterior and, from first impressions, you didn’t look like you could hurt a fly. But as he heard you say, you clearly put on a fake act to come across as polite and kind when really you are rude deep down. He didn’t mean to eavesdrop on you. Twice now. But he is so glad he did, because now he knows not to waste his energy on you. He knows what you think of him and he has formed his opinion of you. He hurries back to his room.
‘He’s not my friend Y/N, I only said that to you to make you go on the date with an open mind. I’ve only ever had one conversation with the guy,’ Steve jokes and you playfully push his arm, ‘All jokes aside, his behaviour breaks a lot of conduct rules and is a good enough reason to have him knocked down a few squads.’ Steve replies and you sigh with relief. You hug Steve and thank him for his help, he’s taken slightly off guard but hugs you back before you go your separate ways.
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 A few weeks later, you walk into the kitchen to find the whole team eating their breakfast. Sam is cooking and when he sees you, he makes a plate and hands it to you.
‘Thank you Sam.’ You hug him and take the plate, turning around at the sound of Bucky’s scoff. You haven’t had a conversation with Bucky since you bumped into each other in the hallway. You had tried to but he either completely ignored you or just rolled his eyes and left the room.
At first it hurt, you wondered if you had done something wrong. The team seemed just as confused by it as you. Bucky didn’t have a problem with anyone else. That wasn’t to say he was extremely friendly with them, he wasn’t there yet and nobody blamed him but he could hold conversation with the others. He even laughed at their jokes. You were starting to get fed up with it so after breakfast you headed to Bucky’s room to talk to him. You knocked on the door and it wasn’t long until he answered it. As soon as he saw you his face fell visibly.
‘Can we talk?’ You asked hoping he would let you into his room. He paused to consider it then stepped out of his room, closing the door behind him. He stood there with his arms crossed and waited for you to talk.
‘Is there something I did wrong?’ You ask him and he keeps a blank face.
‘Why do you care?’ He asks still arms crossed over his body.
‘I care because you are always scoffing or rolling your eyes at me whenever I try to talk to you.’
‘I’m not scoffing or rolling my eyes now.’ He points out.
‘No but you’re not exactly being very friendly.’
‘Would you prefer for me to fake it then? Just put on a smile and pretend to like you?’ He jabs. You take a moment to process what he just said. You didn’t realise he could be so mean.
‘No Bucky I would prefer for you to maybe make an effort to get to know me before making a judgement.’ You scowl at him.
‘I have a perfectly fine judgement of you. I am not going to fall for your fake smiles and fake friendships.’ Bucky snarls and walks back into his room closing his door in your face. You are left to stand there in shock.
On the other side of the door Bucky is leaning there conflicted. The shock on your face looked so genuine. No, he has to remember it is all an act with you.
From that day on you decided you weren’t going to make an effort with him. It wasn’t the most mature decision but you were tired. What used to be eye rolls and scoffs, now turned into snarky comments and you were no longer afraid to throw them right back at him.
Steve had tried a few times to talk to you about it but, when he couldn’t tell you why Bucky hated you, he realised there was nothing he could do to change how either of you felt about the other. What he could do was change up your schedules so the two of you were rarely ever in the same room together.
Unfortunately, instead of the arguments happening quite calmly but consistently over the course of the whole day. They were now much shorter, confined to just mealtimes, and much more heated and intense. None of the team knew which was worse.
You were sparring in the gym with Natasha trying to work off some steam from this morning’s argument with Bucky.
‘Your moves are sloppy, get whatever is making you emotional out of your head.’ She grunts at you but this only forces you further into your head.
You go hard at her, but she blocks every move so you go to defence. She smirks at you, ‘Has a certain super soldier got into your head?’
That causes a surge of anger to hit you and again you go hard at Natasha, but your anger only allows her to catch you off balance and you are pinned to the mat in a matter of seconds.
‘So it is Barnes.’ She  pulls you up and you brush yourself off before getting back into a fighting stance.
‘I don’t want to talk about it.’ You grunt at her and start your attack. Your moves are still predictable and anger clouds your mind. You feel yourself getting more and more worked up with every hit she blocks.
You retreat to take a breather, you hear the door open and you glance over, the man of the hour has just entered and you roll your eyes but continue to spar with Natasha.
Out the corner of your eye, you see him make his way over to you both, watching as you take a lot of hits from her and barely manage to land any of your own.
‘I have seen toddlers fight better than you Y/N.’ You hear him chuckle.
‘I don’t need your opinion.’ You grunt, still trying to keep your focus on Natasha.
‘Fight like that on the field and you’ll be dead in two seconds.’
‘Keep talking and you’ll wish you were dead.’
He laughs ‘Is that a threat?’ You ignore him and continue sparring. ‘Your punches are so weak, how did you become an Avenger again?’ He is still smiling knowing exactly which buttons to push.
You stop and make your way over to him. ‘I became an Avenger because of my talent and my strength, that I worked hard to earn.’ You are right up in his face, almost chest to chest. You are breathing hard, partly from the exercise but mostly because of how riled up you are. You notice he is breathing hard as well, his breath fanning across your face.
Your mind can’t help but drift, is this what he would look like in bed, his chest rising and falling faster than normal. Small beads of sweat gathered at his hairline from his recent run. You suddenly realise how close the two of you are and force the inappropriate thoughts from your mind. You hate how seeing him so riled up is actually a huge turn on. How could you let yourself be attracted to such an asshole?
‘You wouldn’t stand a chance against me.’ His voice drops so low that in a different circumstance you would have happily dropped your panties.
‘You’re right. I wouldn’t stand a chance against you and your metal arm that you were given. Or you and the super soldier serum that you were given.’ You know they are cheap shots but you just couldn’t help how absolutely fuming he makes you. He had managed to get under your skin and the thought of him being successful only made you angrier.
He leans down even more, your noses almost touching ‘I don’t know how everyone else can’t see through your little nice act. You pretend to be so kind on the outside but deep down you’re a bitch.’ Ouch. You deserved that one for what you said to him but it didn’t make it hurt any less. Especially because if you were hooked up to a lie detector and asked to say those things again, it would flash up as a blatant lie. However, looking into his eyes there was not an ounce of regret for what he said.
Bucky knew he shouldn’t have said what he did, but you had hit a nerve and it was the only thing he could think to say back. He saw the hurt flash across your eyes but it was too late to take it back now. The only thing he could do was exit the situation before it got any worse. He turned on his heels and left the room, leaving you standing there in complete shock at your exchange. 
Natasha calls your name but you quickly leave for your room before anyone can see you like this.
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The team was split all across the base. This wasn’t how you would usually handle missions but as soon as you arrived the mission started to go sideways.
‘Target headed towards the west elevator. Anyone nearby copy?’ You hear Steve’s voice through comms.
‘I'm on it.’ You say back, your comms crackling more than usual.
‘Copy that.’ Bucky said, his comms crackling from the two of you talking at the same time.
The rest of the team had heard both of your voices but neither of you had heard the other. So it was a big shock when you were waiting for the elevator and you heard his voice behind you.
‘You have got to be kidding me.’ He sighs and slowly walks up to you to wait for the elevator as well. ‘Did you not hear me say I got it?’ He snaps at you.
‘No because I was the one that said I’m on it.’ You snap back and thankfully the elevator dings it’s arrival. Normally in creepy Hydra bases you would avoid elevators but seeing as there was no stairwell nearby, this was the only option.
‘Age before beauty.’ You say to him, gesturing to the elevator.
‘Very funny’ he says sarcastically before stepping inside. You follow after him and press the only floor button available.
Silence permeates the small space as you prepare for what’s to happen once the doors open. Instead, the elevator jerks to a stop.
‘No.’ You panic and start pressing the floor button over and over. ‘No no no no no.’ Nothing is working.
‘Let me try.’ Bucky says pushing you out of the way, you so badly want to say something but the only thing you can focus on is the fact you might be trapped. Bucky taps the button and looks around for anything else to press but there is nothing. You can feel yourself start to get light headed as claustrophobia takes hold and the thought of falling to your death in this metal box takes over your thoughts. You shrink down onto the floor and hold your head in your hands.
‘Do you always have to be so dramatic?’ Bucky huffs. You don’t answer him, the only thing you can think about is the pain starting in your chest and your breathing getting heavier. 
‘Stop breathing so fast. You are going to make yourself pass out.’ Bucky grunts but when you don’t reply or make any effort to slow your breathing he gets worried. He kneels down in front of you ‘Hey? Doll? Can you hear me?’ You can’t answer him, you just feel the impending doom and the immense pressure on your chest. ‘I’m going to move your hands.’ He announces then you feel him take your hands and pull them away from your face. You look at him, tears in your eyes, a look of pure fear across your face. ‘Breathe with me, doll. Can you do that?’ He asks and you manage to nod. He speeds his breathing up to your pace then gradually slows it, you follow him as best as you can and eventually you get your breathing back to normal, with the occasional hiccup or sharp intake.
Once he sees you are ok, he lets go of your hands and sits on the floor as far away as he can. You both continue to sit in silence.
‘Thank you.’ You eventually manage to whisper, he nods without meeting your eye.
You can’t help but feel disappointed, you just got to see a caring side of Bucky and it felt amazing to be on the receiving end of it, but now you are back to him not giving a shit about you. You go back and forth wondering whether it is the right time to bring up the issues between you two. If not now, when?
‘Why do you hate me so much?’ He looks across at you and sighs before he answers.
‘I don’t hate you.’
‘Yes you do. It seems like you go out of your way to make me miserable.’ You push, making him lean his head back on the wall behind him.
‘I don’t hate you. I just don’t like how you formed opinions about me so early on. You wanted me off the team before I even got cleared to be on the team.’ Bucky explains. You stare at him in confusion.
‘How do you know what opinions I formed of you? I may have wanted you off the team but it was only because you were mean and that was after you were cleared.’ You could feel yourself starting to get angry.
‘Then how come I overheard you talking about the first time we met to Nat, you said I was blunt and rude. Then after I accidentally bumped into you, you told Steve you wanted me off the team.’ Bucky says agitatedly.
‘I never-‘ you think back to any conversations you had with Nat and Steve about Bucky. The only ones that came to mind were asking them if they knew why Bucky didn’t like you. Then it hits you, he had overheard you talking to Steve and Nat about Arthur. You sighed.
‘Let me guess, you overheard me and Nat talking not long after we first met. We were in Nat’s room getting ready to go train?’ You ask and he nods.
‘Then the conversation you overheard with Steve was straight after we bumped into each other. We were in the common room?’ Bucky looks confused but nods again.
‘You are such a prick. You eavesdrop but don’t even listen long enough to hear who we were talking about.’ You can’t help but chuckle at the situation, even though it’s not particularly funny.
‘What?’ Bucky looks more confused than ever.
‘Well, if you had listened properly to the whole conversation you would know I was talking about that asshat agent, Arthur.’ That came out more blunt than you intended.
‘The recruit that got bumped down a few squads even though he is really good?’
‘Yep. That’s the one’
‘I don’t understand.’
‘Before you came Steve and Nat had been setting me up on blind dates with people. Arthur was the fifth one, I really didn’t want to go so Steve convinced me by saying they were friends and all this nice stuff about him.’ You pause to take a deep breath. ‘The day we met, I had just come from the date with him and it was awful. That's what me and Nat were talking about. Then when we bumped into each other in the hallway, I had just come from a meeting with the recruits. Arthur had been inappropriate and he hurt my arm, I was rushing to Steve to tell him and ask if he can be kicked off the team.’ You finally manage to say and Bucky just looks at you. You can see the cogs turning in his head as he is finally getting context to the snippets of conversation he overheard.
‘Shit. I am so sorry. I am such an idiot.’ He scolds himself and you can’t help but feel bad for him.
‘I am not going to disagree with you, but we have both said and done some pretty nasty stuff. I am sorry for any hurt I caused you.’  You say sincerely and he looks over to you and smiles.
‘So you didn’t think I was rude when we first met?’ He still holds your eye contact and you take a moment to look at him. You have never seen him look so vulnerable before, he almost looked scared.
‘No, Bucky, I thought you were probably nervous or tired from meeting loads of new people.’ You explain and his shoulders fall.
‘I feel like such a jerk.’ He sighs and you scoot yourself closer to him so he has to look at you.
‘I’m not all that innocent in this either. It was a misunderstanding. I am just glad we have cleared it up now.’ You say meaning it and he smiles earnestly back at you. It is something you have never experienced first-hand. You have seen him give those gorgeous, slightly lopsided, smiles to other people but seeing one directed at you causes a rush of heat to your cheeks and you find yourself blushing.
Bucky must have been thinking along the same lines ‘You’re cute when you blush. I have never seen this side of you before.’ He brushes some hair out of your face and behind your ear. ‘You know, part of the reason I was so nervous when I first met you was because I was taken off guard by how beautiful you are.’ His cheeks flush slightly at his confession.
Before you can say anything the elevator jerks again and starts moving, you and Bucky are quick on your feet, preparing yourself for the doors to open.
When they finally do you are met with a group of Hydra agents ready to attack. You and Bucky work in tandem, playing off each other’s strengths. When the Hydra agents realize this, they work to separate you. The majority of them are on Bucky but you are fighting four at once. You are onto the last one when he raises his gun to shoot but you force his arm down. Not quick enough, it fires and clips your calf causing you to cry out from the pain 
It is not as bad as actually being shot in the leg but it still hurts like hell and you can’t put pressure on it. The room is pretty silent apart from footsteps you recognise to be Bucky approaching. You move quickly and uppercut the guy in the nose. The crack echoes throughout the room as the guy falls to the floor at your feet.
You turn to Bucky, his mouth agape and eyebrows raised in shock. ‘That was hot.’ He announces finally, making you laugh, you go to take a step towards him but realise too late that your injured leg won’t hold your weight. You would have fallen to the floor if Bucky hadn’t rushed to catch you.
‘Thanks.’ You chuckle, your faces are extremely close. Your eyes completely entranced in his. Your whole body warms at the safe feeling of being in his arms. You start to wonder what it would be like to fall asleep in these arms, to wake up the next morning still wrapped up in them. Protected.
You force yourself back to reality by clearing your throat. ‘We should probably get back to the team.’ You say and he nods. He puts his arm around your waist and you put yours over his shoulders to use him as a crutch.
The ride back up in the elevator goes smoothly this time and before you know it you are hobbling up to the quinjet where the rest of the team awaits. Natasha and Steve are both looking back and forth from you to Bucky in confusion.
‘What the hell happened?’ Steve asks not trying to hide how baffled he is that you and Bucky are holding onto each other and not arguing. Natasha simply smirks. Bucky helps you into a seat then sits opposite you with a wink as you smile at him.
‘No, this is too weird. Please argue, bicker, roll your eyes. Anything.’ Sam begs Bucky who doesn’t break his eye contact with you. Bucky simply laughs knowing his behaviour is unsettling Sam and enjoying the newfound comradery with you.
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what-i-call-men · 3 years
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The Evans w an independent significant other/how clingy the Evans are
The Evans x Gn!reader
Warnings: Some possessiveness, some mentions of killing
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Tate:
Tate absolutely hates when you're independent. If it were up to him you’d stay in the house with him all day and you’d be dependent on him for everything. He hates when you leave the house, when you eat without him, even if you shower without him. Let’s be real though, if you're in the house you're not alone because even if you don't see him, Tate is there watching you all the time- hell he doesn’t have much better to do. If you tell him you're staying at a friend’s or going out at night, not sure when you’d be home, he would immediately try to stop you from going. When you eventually get off the property he waits at the window for you to come back just like a needy puppy. “But babe, why go to a party with sweaty horny teenagers when you could stay here and we could play a board game?” “Tate we played Monopoly, candy land, twister, uno and parcheesi today. I don’t even think we own any more board games.”
Kit:
Kit kinda finds it attractive. He obviously has his moments of wanting to be the provider and take care of you, but he also loves that you listen to him about his work and retain alot of it. He’s watched you diagnose a problem on your own car and you were completely correct on it when he took a look. On a night he had to stay late at the shop working on one car that wouldn’t seem to start, you show up to his work dressed in some jeans and one of his work shirts, offering to help him with the cars so he could get out of work a little sooner. Man, he almost creamed his pants then and there. He watched you as you looked under the hood, tweaking and filling and checking, not asking him for any help, and Kit was immediately reminded of why he loved you so much. Eventually he’d have to shake himself out of it, bumping your hip with his own. “Hey, suga, as great as you look bent over this car, you’re showin’ me up.”
Kyle:
Kyle absolutely loves watching you be independent and strong. You were in some of his engineering classes and you always seemed to know what you were doing. He had stopped you after the lecture and asked you for some help on one of his projects, and he was honestly wowed at your understanding of the work, having only been explained it 10 minutes earlier. He loves when you very blatantly turn down other guys or tell them that they’re wrong. He also boasts you up and helps you look better, a lot of the time this happens when you present research in class. Usually you read him your speeches as you write them, and he will ask questions after you present so you can reiterate your main points. “Any questions?” “Yeah can you tell us more about what you consider the biggest pros of solar power?” Post-death Kyle kinda depends on you so you had to be very independent. He likes to watch you carry the groceries by yourself or take care of the garden outside your small house. This includes when you have to fix up things around the house, you always muttering how you don’t need some old man coming into your house and telling you to turn a couple screws and charging you for it. Although Kyle never knows what you're doing or how to help, he is very good at holding flashlights and handing you screws. “Kyle, could you hand me the drill? No the drill… the drill… You know what, just hold this flashlight for me, hun.”
Jimmy:
Jimmy gets confused sometimes. Sometimes when you offer to carry props or set pieces, he will refuse your help and ask Eve or someone else, thinking that his significant other should never have to lift a finger as long as he has something to do with it. It isn’t until he loses his hands that he has to let you do everything. He watches as you lift set pieces, or pull down a rope and just kind of watches in awe because you are so much stronger than you look. He secretly loves watching you show off your strength, especially when you kicked a heckler right in the balls and the man passed out from the pain. When another heckler started insulting you during a show, you fully began to roast him in front of the crowd, this never failed to amaze Jimmy. He always loved to watch you deal with people like that because you were so quick to tell them off in a way that made them drop the fight all together. “Darlin’ you know if I could help it you’d never have to lift a single finger?” “Jimmy, you can’t even feed yourself, I have to lift a few fingers.”
James:
James gets conflicted by your independence. He loves when you ask him for help or when you search him out for encouragement, but when he saw you murder a man trying to abuse his girlfriend, and you dragged him to one of James’ body chutes, James couldn’t have been more proud. He loved to watch you murder alone, but he absolutely hated when you would leave the hotel to go out or go to work. He knew you didn’t need protection from him but that didn’t stop him from wanting you to jump into his arms and ask him to help you. He didn’t love it when you would go to the bar alone, all dressed up, drinking and eventually getting others to join in on seudo karaoke, but he loved to see you enjoying yourself and sometimes you’d make him join in. Most of the times you did ask him for any kind of help, you never let him do it all. Sometimes there would be a body you couldn’t lift, so James would offer his help a few times before you finally said yes, only letting him help you lift it, then shooing him away and taking care of the body by yourself. “Dearest, do you need help?” “No.” “Darling, you’re going to hurt yourself, let me help.” “No, James.”... “James, Can you just lift his feet up for me?” “Of course my love.”
Kai:
HA you thought. Kai doesn’t want you to be independent AT ALL. If you were independent before meeting him, that definitely changes when you’re with him. He doesn’t like you going out alone, if somehow you get him to budge on that, you’re not driving yourself, if you somehow do, you have a curfew to be back home by before he comes out and picks you up. Usually that leads to some sort of argument or fight. You always have to have your location on on your phone if you do go out. He also may or may not have a tracker on your car just in case. If you’re the kind of person that’s chill with not being independent, Kai will usually keep you within eyesight if you’re in the house. If you need to pee or want to make food, usually Kai will either join you or silently pick up whatever he’s doing and move with you into whatever room you’re going into. It’s less of a clingy thing as it is paranoia for him- he wants to make sure you’re loyal to him all the time. “Where’re you going?” “The bathroom to take a shower.”... “I’ll join you.” You could never really fight him on it.
Malcolm:
Malcolm kind of expects you to be independent, but he does enjoy it when you two hang out. He can’t spend all the time with you and you both have jobs that take up your time so being clingy or obsessive is a no-no for him. He likes to send you texts and pictures during the day though and he also enjoys facetiming when you can’t see each other. Overall being with Malcolm is one of the most healthy and non-toxic relationships you could be in. Even when you two move in together, you were both very independent and respectful of each others space. The only exception was on days Malcolm felt sad or lonely, he’d come over to the couch where you sat on your laptop, laying his head on your lap in the way of the screen, pouting up at you. “Can we watch some cheesy reality show and get drunk?” He’d ask and you’d laugh. “Want me to play with your hair too?” “Fucking of course.”
Jeff:
Jeff could be either one of the extremes. He’d either be extremely obsessed with you, wanting to provide you with everything you asked for before you even asked for it, or he’d tell you you’re in an open relationship and treat you like a choice. There’s really not too much in between. If he’s clingy, Jeff would put your relationship in every aspect of his life, even offering you more than your job paid you so you could just sit at his desk every day and do coke with him. He would never let you drive to work alone and would spend pretty much all day talking with you or even just staring at you as you did your own work on your laptop. “So how are you doing?” “I’m the same as I was two minutes ago.” If Jeff was ok with your independence, he’d pretty much expect it from you. If you were going to independent, so was he, pretty much meaning the two of you were not much more than fuck buddies. Sometimes though he’d get jealous of how much you got drinks bought for you at a bar, or how many other people you’d post on social media with, wishing he had the guts to ask for more from you, but never actually doing it. “Y/n can I ask you something?” “yeah.” “Do you… Would you… You want some coffee?” “Nah i’m good.”
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Imagine being Sokka and Katara’s cousin and having a complicated romantic relationship with Zuko.
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Your cousin Sokka had initially set you up with Zuko because he figured the firelord needed some fun and you were exactly that. You weren’t interested in titles or riches you were just an infectious whirlwind of carefree energy. He figured Zuko could learn something from you and so arranged the date.
He could tell by how light Zuko walked into the room the next day that his plan had worked and he liked seeing the positive effect you were having on Zuko. The pressures of the throne had really been weighing down on him and you helped him to get some much-needed freedom and connect with his non-Firelord side....however it always had a way of coming back.
Zuko loved dating you but he’d gotten pressure from every single fire nation noblemen on the council to break up with you. They disliked you because you were from the water tribe so many viewed you as an outsider trying to influence the fire nation. Zuko’s reign was still so new and with rebellions breaking out more frequently Zuko agreed. He had to put his country first even if that meant losing you. One thing Zuko hadn’t realised however was you had a very different view of your relationship...for one thing you didn’t even realise you were in one with the Firelord.
Your POV
Zuko was always pretty tense but you noticed tonight he was even more stressed and quiet. You tried to make conversation but he was sombre throughout dinner and when you’d finished he put his cutlery down and looked across at you. “Y/n I need to speak to you”. You nodded folding your arm “sure, what’s wrong?”. Zuko sighed "Y/n i’ve really enjoyed our time together but i...have to break up with you, I can’t see you anymore". You blinked surprised, one at Zuko’s honesty and two at the news you had apparently been dating the Firelord. You and Zuko weren’t dating or even close to dating, in your mind you’d just been having fun and sure you were definitely not just friends but you also didn’t think you were boyfriend/girlfriend. Regardless of what the label was you quickly realised what Zuko was telling you and it made a heavy weight settle in your stomach. Whatever this between you was...it made you sad to think it would be ending.  "You do?" you asked remaining composed and Zuko nodded. "It’s nothing to do with you it’s me, being firelord i don’t have the time for dating or fun, i don’t think it’s fair to keep this going when I can’t guarantee i’ll always be able to give you my attention". You nodded your head "that sounds fair, thank you for thinking of that". "No problem" Zuko said smiling sadly and you nodded awkwardly. “I’ll be going then” and you went to walk away when he spoke again "but i really enjoyed our time together y/n, i really did". You smiled "me too, you’re pretty fun for a royal" and bowed "see you around firelord” and you walked away.
Zuko’s POV
You walked out of the room and Zuko sighed. He felt a mix between relief and sadness. That had gone a lot easier than he thought it would and that should be a good thing but it didn’t feel that way. A part of Zuko had wanted you to argue with him or to dig to find the real reason he was breaking it off. He knew if you’d have challenged him in even the slightest way he’d have told you the truth and taken back what he’d said but you had just agreed and let it go without a fight. Zuko couldn’t help feeling disappointed and a little hurt. You remained on his mind the rest of the day and Zuko couldn’t stop wondering about your reaction. He was sat with your cousin Sokka when he decided to bring you up. "Just so you know I’ve ended things with y/n" Zuko explained and Sokka blinked "i’m sorry what?". "I know i should’ve warned you seeing as she’s your cousin...i’m sorry". Sokka shook his head "no i’m confused how do you think you were dating her". Zuko blinked "what do you mean? You literally set us up". "I introduced you because i thought y/n could make you loosen up a bit but Zuko y/n doesn’t date". Zuko blinked "but we hung our several times and...kissed and stuff". Sokka sighed "oh god as gross as this is to have to explain about my cousin...Zuko that doesn’t mean you were dating". "It doesn’t?”. Sokka sighed "okay here’s what you need to know about my cousin, she grew up in a town that was heavily sexist and married girls off at young ages, so as times started to change she leapt at the new opportunities. She refused to ever date anyone, it’s too much commitment and so instead she has fun with people, typically for short periods of time and then she flutters away, usually leaving a broken heart or two". Zuko blinked "but we were dating!". "Did you ever agree to make it exclusive?" Sokka asked. Zuko shook his head "well not in words". "Did you ever ask her to be your girlfriend?". "No but i thought it was implied". "Did you ever call her your girlfriend then?". "No i...it was new i didn’t want to come on too strong" Zuko sighed. Sokka patted his back "and there’s the broken heart". "I’m not heartbroken just confused! Why did she let me break up with her if we weren’t even dating?". "Well breakups are awkward, imagine having to explain to someone in the middle of one, that you're not even dating, i bet she did it just to spare your feelings". As soon as those words left his mouth Sokka regretted it. "No i didn’t mean that...i meant". Zuko stood up angrily "it appears i need to find your cousin".
Zuko was furious. He felt like he’d been living two different lives this whole time and that had caused so much stress. One half of him was the teenager who wanted fun, the freedom to go on dates and just be careless. Then the other half of him was the Firelord who knew he had to be responsible. He knew all the elder nobles thought he was too irresponsible and all his friends thought him too boring and conventional. He liked you because you opened him up to new things and made him feel normal. Not too young or too formal, just right, you made him feel valid.
But he’d sacrificed all that for the “greater good” and now not only was he regretting his decision he was also furious because apparently he wasn’t anything to you anyway. The thing he’d struggled so much with, you weren’t even aware of.
Zuko walked into the large living room the gang had taken to lounging in and saw you sat with Haru. He felt his temper rise as Sokka’s words filled his mind. How you broke hearts and moved on instantly. You laughed at something Haru said and Zuko’s eyes narrowed. He really meant nothing to you. Zuko stalked across the room and came to stand in front of you both. Haru jumped "Firelord Zuko" but you took your time glancing at him. You eventually raised your eyes to his and nodded "Firelord Zuko". Zuko tensed "y/n we need to talk". "Is it urgent because....". "It is, now...please" Zuko said and he walked away.
Your POV
You blinked as Zuko stormed away and apologised to Haru before following him. You had no idea why Zuko wanted to speak to you, surely everything was wrapped up now you were done but he seemed so angry. You’d heard about this famous fire nation temper but you’d never seen it on Zuko and part of you was a little impressed. You liked fire benders for that reason precisely, their inner fire and passion but Zuko had been completely composed and calm the whole time you’d know him. Not now though.
You followed Zuko into a room and he shut the door. "Zuko what’s wrong?" you asked and he spun to face you rapidly. "What’s wrong?" he cried "why did you let me break up with you and say all that rubbish if I meant nothing to you?". You paused "who says you mean nothing to me?". "Sokka!" Zuko cried "he explained how you flit from person to person, never dating them just having fun and how you move onto your next person when you get bored. We were never dating, why didn’t you correct me?". You shrugged "i... I didn't want to be rude, but Zuko I wasn’t just waiting to flit from you to someone else". "Ow yeah, Haru’s just a coincidence?". "You broke up with me! Why are you angry even if something was going on with Haru?". "Because i didn’t want to break up with you y/n" Zuko explained "i did it because i had to and it was a really tough decision for me to make. It felt like a big sacrifice to me and then to find out you didn’t even think twice about me" Zuko said rapidly before staring at the floor almost deflated. "Zuko i do think about you" you said softly "whatever Sokka said isn’t completely true. Yes i don’t like putting labels on things but that doesn’t mean i don’t care or feel the same things anyone does at the start of something. I think the reason i move on or flit around so quickly as you said is because i move on as soon as I start feeling things, i don’t like being vulnerable so me not thinking of you as my boyfriend wasn’t because I didn’t care about you, it was more to protect me from the opposite". "So you do like me?" Zuko asked and you took a breath. "I do...a lot". Zuko rushed forwards hastily and kissed you. You kissed him back wrapping your arms around his neck before you paused "but wait...i thought you said you literally weren’t allowed to do this". Zuko nodded but didn’t remove his hands from your waist "i did, as Firelord i’m expected to behave dignified and composed all the time, i’m not supposed to get emotional or act irresponsibly for example by dating an unconventional water tribe girl" Zuko smiled "but i don’t care! I don’t care if they disapprove! I don’t care if we’re boyfriend and girlfriend or it’s just casual, all i know is i really like you and really really want to kiss you". You smiled and rehooked your arm around his neck "then kiss me".
Zuko was obedient and kissed you passionately before moving onto your neck. You were both surprised and pleasantly fascinated at Zuko’s confidence. Usually he was shy and kissed you quickly before moving away but now....now he was confident and purposeful with each touch. It was very attractive and you suddenly saw why the fire nation had such a strong reputation. Zuko caught the look in your eye and smiled "if you want we can....go to my room?". You smiled "lead the way”. Zuko stepped towards the door so quickly he knocked a table over but he just tugged you past it "leave it, it can stay that way for all i care right now" he muttered and you laughed at how spontaneous he was being. It was nice to see him let his hair down and you grinned as he pulled you through the fire nation halls hastily. He yanked his door open before pulling you inside and slamming the door. Trapping you on the other side. "Hmm i don’t think running through the hall is dignified Firelord Zuko". Zuko shrugged "neither is this" and began to kiss you again.
***
You laid side by side and Zuko seemed very relaxed but you were wondering about something. "Should I be going...am i even allowed to stay here in your room overnight? Doesn’t it break some century old fire nation tradition?" you asked. You’d never been in Zuko’s room before and only now did it really hit you he was the Firelord with a whole country on his shoulders and hundreds of advisors all monitoring his every move. If they’d gotten so angry at you for spending time together surely the nobles would be furious at you spending the night in his quarters? Zuko however did not care. "Of course you can” he said immediately “no servants will bother us and my guards will know to leave so we can be alone...of course that’s if you want to? If you don’t want to stay the night...". “Are you kidding me? And miss sleeping in these silk masterpieces?" you asked wriggling against the royal bedding. Zuko laughed watching you before he looked more serious. "I meant what i said" Zuko said softly "you don’t have to be my anything...i like you, i don’t need any labels or anything". "But do you want them?" you asked. You’d been more honest with Zuko than you’d ever been with anyone and now a part of you....wasn’t terrified by the idea of making him something more. But Zuko had also listened to you too and didn’t want to scare you off. "All i want is you" he smiled coming closer "if you don’t want labels then they won’t come anywhere near us". You smiled at the effort Zuko was making and leant into him. Zuko wrapped his arms around you and you buried your head in his chest. Ignoring the feeling in your stomach that you should have been more honest.
1 week later
Zuko definitely took what you’d said into account. He was a lot more confident with you both in private and publically. Apparently almost losing you made him more determined to make the most of his time with you. He invited you to royal events and was attentive to you throughout them. When nobles questioned him about you he would tell them it was none of their concern and refuse to answer any further prying. You liked seeing Zuko stand up for himself using his dominant abrupt side but also kind of missed his soft sweet side. Sure having a temper and attitude were hot in the moment but after a while they lost their depth and you got the feeling it was an act Zuko was putting on for you. As if  Zuko thought by acting tough and in control with his court you’d be more attracted to him when in reality you loved how caring and considerate he was.
Zuko was also struggling. As well as maintaining the imposing Firelord who didn’t care what others thought of him, Zuko was also pretending he was okay with being casual. Zuko was not a casual person in any meaning of the word. He was a dramatic over-thinker, he had never been carefree and although in the moment with you he did enjoy it, afterwards his mind fretted over everything he’d done. He also worried about your open relationship. He knew freedom was important for you but he couldn’t help but wonder if when you looked at another person you’d start seeing them as well. Zuko liked you a lot and was sure he never wanted to see you with another person. He wondered if it was selfish but he wanted you all to himself and wanted an exclusive relationship....but he’d promised you he would be fine with this and that meant more to him.
So you and Zuko continued the charade to please the other, no idea that the other person actually felt the exact same way.
Your POV
You and Zuko had just had a pleasant evening with his friends and were retiring to his room for the night. On the way you passed a guard who looked at the two of you and then frowned. Zuko immediately tensed and went into Firelord mode. “Something you want to say?” Zuko called and the guard lowered his eyes “no Firelord Zuko”. “I thought not” Zuko agreed and took your hand. Zuko led you into his room and shut the door with a loud snap. You watched Zuko and all the things you’d been feeling this week came up. You needed to say something and now was just as good a time as any.  
You prepared for the night and sat down on the edge of the bed watching Zuko warily, wondering how he’d take what you were about to say.
"Zuko i’ve been thinking about something and I think we need to talk” you said suddenly and Zuko jumped standing up taller. "Are you okay?" he asked immediately coming to sit next to you. "I am and i want to thank you for all the effort you’ve gone to but i think we need to reassess the situation”. Zuko immediately panicked, you’d realised he wasn’t a cool collected leader and that he was faking it....you weren’t attracted to him anymore. "Y/n i think i know what you’re going to say" he frowned when you carried on "i miss how it was before". Zuko blinked "what?". "I know you’re trying to be more dominant in your rule and to be more protective of us but that doesn’t mean you have to act all unfeeling and unbothered for my benefit. You’re a kind sweet person Zuko and I like when you show that, so i guess i’m asking have you been trying to change for me?". Zuko looked down "i have....you just reacted so intensely to me being more confident and so i thought you’d want that more". "I do love it when your confident" you smiled "but you don’t have to keep that in every aspect of our lives, maybe just when we’re alone?". Zuko felt a blush rise to his cheeks but he nodded "okay". You smiled "and sorry one more thing....i know i said i don’t like labels but i think i’d maybe like to try them?". Overcome with the realisation you felt everything he did Zuko just kissed you passionately. You kissed him back before laughing as you separated "what was that for?”. "For weeks i’ve been playing this character and restraining myself from asking you to be exclusive with me and i thought if i felt this way how can we be compatible but all along you felt it too". You blushed and nodded "yes i....i’ve felt that too”. Zuko grinned and kissed you again before pulling away "wait let me make sure i understand this correctly, you’d like us to start dating? Properly and officially?". "And exclusively" you smiled and Zuko grinned "i’m going to do this officially then, y/n will you be my girlfriend". "I thought you’d never ask!" you cried and kissed him again.
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dreamescapeswriting · 3 years
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BTS Reaction || Their Future Son Comes To See Them [Request]
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A/N: Just reminds me of those tiktoks, “is that dad on the poster?” “WhIcH oNe Is It?” Different tropes for the guys since I want to try and see if you guys liked that
SEOKJIN: College Au
There was a flash of green light coming from behind one of the bookcases in the college library and Jin flinched turning to look over his shoulder to see a teenage boy coughing up a storm, 
"You okay?" Jin asked as he slowly got up from his chair to help the boy, he turned to look at Jin and smiled brightly while jumping up and down on the spot. 
"It worked!" He yelled out, earning a death glare from the librarian, 
"It worked?" Jin questioned trying to look behind the case where the boy had emerged but there was nothing there that could explain the green flashing. 
"So...Where is she?" Jin frowned at the question, looking around the library to see if the boy could have been speaking to anybody else but there was nobody besides Jin and the librarian there. 
"...Who?"
"Mum! Where is she? I know you guys said you met in the library but I didn't think you meant it," Jin frowned even more as he stared over at his desk, rubbing his head. Maybe he'd just fallen asleep and this was some kind of weird dream he was having so he slowly made his way back to the desk and sat down.
"There she is!" The boy yelled out in excitement, sitting beside Jin as you entered the library, your head down in a book as you walked towards the table behind Jin completely ignoring him.
"I must have messed up the dates, I thought you said you and mum met today...I wanted to see it," Jin shook his head before turning to look at the boy. 
"What are you talking about? Is this some kind of sick joke?" Jin had always had a crush on you, it was no secret amongst him and his friends so he figured this was their way of pranking him for it.
"Dad...No, I came from the future to see you...I wanted to watch you guys meet for the first time." Jin shook his head even more not believing it for a single second but then he heard you gasp in shock, his whole body turned to look at you as you clutched your finger. 
"Paper cut," Jin walked over to you, cleaning up your finger while giving you a band-aid, 
"I always come prepared," You laughed softly at him introducing yourself while your future son sat back and observed everything there was.
When Jin turned back to question the boy on who he really was he was gone and just like that he was talking to you about the book you were reading and what you were doing for the prom that was coming up.
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YOONGI: Idol!Au
Yoongi stared at the boy that was sitting on his studio sofa, 
"Oh sweet, you have these in the future too!" The boy yelled out reaching forward to take some of the sweets that were sitting in the middle of the coffee table in front of Yoongi's sofa,
"How- Did somebody let you in?" Yoongi could have sworn he hadn't heard the bell to his door go off to signal someone was coming into the room and he hadn't been working that hard on anything. 
"No, I used my time machine, I wanted to see what you were doing today eighteen years ago...You grounded me so I just wanted to explore for a bit." Yoongi stared at the boy before shaking his head, 
"I'm asleep. I just fell asleep because I'm working too hard." He mumbled to himself as he began turning back to the computer and working, 
"If I was in your dreams how would I know the password to your computer and the fact that your crush is going to meet you in fifteen minutes." Yoongi's hand on the mouse tightened and the boy smirked, 
"No one knows about my crush on Y/n," He grumbled turning to look back at the boy who was nodding, 
"I do, in fact, mum knows she's just waiting for the right time to do something about it. She's still stuck on the whole, "It'll ruin our friendship" thing but you win her over in the end," 
"You keep saying, mum, who's your mum?" The door to Yoongi's office opened and you walked into the room with food in your hands, 
"I bought lunch! I also stopped by your favourite coffee place and got your favourite snacks," You stopped speaking when you saw the boy on his sofa, 
"I didn't know you had a friend-"
"I was just leaving, have fun." The boy got up and headed to the door, with your back to him he pointed at you and mouthed, "that's mum" to Yoongi before leaving the room with a giant smile on his face, Yoongi more confused than ever.
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HOSEOK: Non!Idol AU
"You know, it would all go a lot smoother if you just spoke to her," A voice from behind Hoseok said making him jump, kneeing the table and spilling his drink all over the floor. 
"What? S-Speak to who?" He stuttered out at the teenage boy that was now sitting in front of him while you came over to clean up the spilt drink. 
"Her," The boy mumbled as you walked away to get some cleaning supplies, 
"What are you talking about?" The boy sighed rolling his head back as he stared at the ceiling, 
"Mum always said you were clueless when you were younger," He turned to look back at Hoseok who seemed even more confused than before. 
"Talk to her, give her your number. She's sick of dropping you hints that you don't pick up on," Hoseok shook his head as he tried to think what the boy was talking about. 
"You said mum said I was clueless...Do I know you?" The boy rolled his eyes, 
"Ah, what the hell, you won't remember. I'm your son from the future...I came to tell you that mum was always sick of your taking your time on asking her out...So just do it," Hoseok blinked trying to decide if he had heard that sentence right or if he was just starting to lose his mind. 
"She was really pretty at my age...Not that she's not beautiful you know in the future but dad...Seriously, take a shot before you lose-" He stopped speaking when you came back to the table, 
"I'll just get this cleaned up, is there anything I can get you for you Hobi and your new little friend?" You turned to look at the boy and that was when you and Hoseok both noticed he was gone,
"Weird...I didn't hear the bell on the door," You frowned but Hoseok smiled at you, 
"He must have had something to do, I didn't even know him...Do you maybe...Wanna hang out this weekend?" Your eyes lit up, you'd been dreaming of him asking you out for weeks. 
"Sure, text me." You whispered, writing your number down on an order form and giving it to him before hopping back behind the counter.
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NAMJOON: Book shop AU
"Isn't that like the fifth time you've been in there this week, mum is going to think you're insane," Namjoon jumped at the boy that was standing in front of him when he came out of the store. He looked too old to be your son but Namjoon stared at him, 
"I didn't know Y/n had a son," Namjoon said to the boy who shook his head, 
"She doesn't yet, you and her will have one in the future and that's me." Namjoon laughed loudly before covering his mouth as he saw people staring over at him with a look of confusion on their faces. 
"What are you talking about?" The boy sighed leaning against the wall that was behind him, 
"I know you'll never believe me but I'm your future son, you and Y/n end up together and you both end up very happy." Namjoon smiled at the thought of it, being with you. It had been his dream for the longest time since he had a huge crush on you but he never for a second thought that the boy in front of him would even be his future son. 
"What makes you think I would believe-" He stopped speaking when there was a flash of green light and the boy was missing from where he had previously been standing. 
"I need to get some sleep," Namjoon grumbled, walking off in the direction of the dorms.
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JIMIN: Best Friends Sister
Jimin walked past your bedroom door to see a boy standing in the door, 
"Oh...Are you Y/n's boyfriend?" He questioned as he felt jealously beginning to bubble inside of him at the thought of you having a boyfriend. Not that it was his business since you were Jin's younger sister and Jimin knew if he even tried to date you Jin would break every bone in his body. 
"No, God no! She's my mum! Ew!" Jimin frowned wondering if it was some kind of joke that he wasn't understanding but the boy looked around the room. 
"I came to see if you guys were together yet but I think I got the year wrong," He mumbled beginning to tap on a watch that was around his wrist, 
"What are you talking about? Got the year wrong? Mum?" The boy let out an unimpressed loud groan. 
"You and Y/n are my mum and dad...You guys will end up together, now if you'll excuse me-" He was cut off when a flash of green happened and Jimin was left in the room by himself. 
"Jimin? What are you doing in my room?" Your voice came from behind him and he jumped, trying to think of an excuse.
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TAEHYUNG: Idol AU
"You can't be shy forever, you have to speak at some point." Taehyung stared at the boy in front of him, claiming to be his son from the future. Taehyung didn't believe him of course, what kind of person would believe something like that? 
"You have no idea what you're talking about," Taehyung mumbled, going back to working on the song he and Jimin were writing with one another, 
"Mum is about to walk through the door, you'll compliment her clothes, she'll compliment your looks and then you'll get so sweaty and nervous you leave the room. That's how mum remembers it anyway," The door handle wiggled and Taehyung filled with dread at the thought of talking you the way that the boy explained it would go down. 
"I'm joking. That's uncle Jimin, he'll go and get Mum in 3...2...1-"
"Y/N WAIT UP!" Taehyung's eyes widened as he realised the boy was telling him the truth, then he filled with joy as he realised he and you were finally going to be the ones to end up together...He just had to somehow pluck up the courage to talk to you properly without his heart combusting into a pile of ashes.
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JUNGKOOK: Best friends Ex
"Whatever the boys are paying you, I'll pay you triple to leave me alone," Jungkook grumbled as the teenage boy sat on the end of his bed watching him closely then checking the date, 
"Oh shit. It's the day Uncle Taehyung found out you loved Y/n...Don't worry dad, it works out...Taehyung forgives you for falling in love with her and he lets you be happy." Jungkook shook his head wanting all of this to go away. He'd confessed to Taehyung about his hidden feelings for you and it started a huge fight between the two of them about how they were supposed to be friends. 
"You're just messing with me, it's Taehyung trying to get me back." He mumbled into the pillow but the boy sighed, 
"If it was Taehyung getting me back how would I know the date you and mum get married, that my middle name is Tae - after my uncle and that you had a weird scar on your left thigh that you got about three weeks ago that you haven't told anyone about." Jungkook froze as he stared up at the boy, 
"I gotta go, but just...Just believe you and mum will be together soon. I promise." With that the boy slowly began to vanish out of the room and Jungkook was left alone with his thoughts, thoughts of you and him finally being together and everyone being happy around you.
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Tagline: @lyoongx @mitzwinchester @rjsmochii @kneel-begyourpardon @taestannie @innersooya @sw33tnight @sweeneyblue1​ @agustdjoon​ @jin-from-the-block​ @acciocriativity​ @that-anxious-bisexual​ @mwitsmejk​
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