#captain america fanfic
Also on Ao3
Steve slams her back against the wall and she laughs, “Is this your kink, Rogers? Slamming people against the wall.”
His eyebrows lower and he practically growls at her, her eyes briefly flash to Sam, who is standing just a few steps behind Steve and he shrugs.
“No.” Steve says, in that deep gravely voice of his, “But yours seems to be fucking up my missions.”
Nats eyes linger on the beard Steve has managed to grow since she last saw him and she lifts her hand to lightly drag her fingers through it, “No. My kink is definitely this beard you’ve managed to grow out.”
“Stop it, Nat.” He snaps as Sam walks away with a chuckle. But he doesn’t pull away from her so she lifts her other hand to the other side of his beard. Her nails lightly scratched over his jawline.
“Seriously, this is hot, Rogers.”
Steve’s hands tighten on her biceps before letting go and dropping to his sides “What are you doing here?”
She rolls her eyes as she steps away from the wall and around Steve, “This is Russia.” She says in her native tongue, “My home.” Off Steve’s look she goes back to English, “I should be asking you boys what you’re doing here.”
“Laying low.” Sam answers for Steve, “Ross was hot on our trail and he practically pushed us here. He doesn’t seem too keen to follow us since we came over the border.”
Natasha hums as she ruffles through the papers on the table, “He has no jurisdiction in Russia. He can’t legally arrest you.” She glances up at Steve, “So you’re safe for the time being.” She holds up a map, “But this…”
Steve snatches it from her hands, “Is none of your concern.”
Nat chuckles, “Geez, you’d think me putting my life on the line for you would hold a little more sway in trusting me, Rogers.”
His eyes silently study her and she lets him without breaking eye contact. It’s been months since she last saw him in the Germany airport. Since she last fought on opposite sides of both her best friends. It’s not exactly a moment she’s proud of but she still stands by her decision. She just wishes it hadn’t left them all in such horrible positions. No one won in their own private civil war. Not Tony, not Steve, certainly not her. She had lost everyone in the decisions she had made.
He breaks eye contact and huffs out a breath, “I know what you did for us. For me, Nat. Don’t think I don’t appreciate it.” He hands the map back to her, “I just don’t want you to get more involved with us. Could manage some pull with Stark if you didn't.”
Nat gives her one shouldered shrug as she studies the map.
“So what’s the plan?” She eventually asks and Sam sighs as Steve breaks it all down.
There’s only two beds in their motel room and although Steve tries to take the floor, Nat manages to convince him she won’t be ruined if they sleep in the same bed. Sam is practically snoring in the bed next to them before they settle in their bed.
“I really do like the beard.” She whispers her fingers curling with the urge to scrape her nails through it again.
Steve gives a small smile, his eyes still closed, his lashes so long on his cheeks, “Yeah? I’m not so sure I can say the same about your blond hair. I’m more partial to the red.”
She lets out a breath of laughter, “I know you are, Rogers. A sucker for the red heads. Although, I heard from a little birdie,”
“Sam?” He interrupts.
“No, actually. Not Sam. Another little bird we know.”
His eyes finally open, “What did you hear, Nat?”
“That you may have finally put a move on another blonde.”
Steve freezes for just a moment then runs a hand through his hair before scratching through his beard. Nat follows his hand until it lands back on his stomach.
“I may have kissed her.” He finally admits.
Steve closes his eyes again, “I’ve been pretty busy running from the government so there is no ‘and’.”
Nat lays back down on her pillow, silent.
“I have a question for you, Nat.”
He turns his body to hers and props his head up with his hand. His eyes study her and she stares back at him, blue and green meeting, his eyelashes so incredibly long, she had almost forgotten how they looked when they would flutter on his cheeks. The moment seems to last for so long, as she holds her breath in anticipation. Then finally, finally he lifts a hand to touch her. She doesn’t care where he touches her, just that he is. His fingers find her bare collarbone and lightly trace over it as his eyes watch, “Why do you keep trying to push me on Carter, when what we have is pretty damn good?”
Nat breaths out a quiet laugh, “That’s pretty cocky of you to think.”
He raises a brow, “Not cocky when you practically sing my praises after every orgasm I give you.” His fingers slide down to the waistband of her shorts and tease along the edge before sliding under and into her panties. She sucks in a breath as they slide over her clit, because fuck did she miss this.
“Sam?” She asks as another snore sounds through the room.
“Sleeps like a fucking bear in hibernation.” He whispers into her ear before nibbling on her lobe, “Trust me. He won’t hear a thing.” He slides two thick fingers inside of her and she lets out a squeak that he instantly swallows with his mouth. Nats hand tangles in his hair as his tongue sweeps into her mouth. As much as she loves him touching her and fucking her, it’s when he kisses her that always makes her weak.
She breaks the kiss to tilt her head back with a breathy moan as he pumps his fingers inside of her. She’s already so close to coming undone and she hasn’t even touched him yet.
“Fuck, Steve.” She groans and his eyes sweep over her face in pure desire and that there does it for her. Her breath stutters as she comes undone around his fingers.
Slowly he slides his fingers out of her when she’s done whimpering and she lifts her head to catch him in another deep kiss.
“Think you can fuck me without making the bed squeak?”
He chuckles, “No.” and makes his point by just bouncing a little. The sound of the bed is so loud Sam's snore actually stutters. They smile at one another and he kisses her again, “Another night.”
Her hand slides down his stomach and over the bulge in his shorts. She grips him through his shorts and slides her hand up and down a few times. He drops his head between her breasts in a frustrated groan.
“Did you like kissing her?” She doesn’t know why she asks.
“Nat.” He groans.
She slides her hand into his shorts and smooths her thumb over his slit to collect the precum before fisting him.
He lifts his head to look at her, he’s studying her to try and figure out why she’s asking. She smiles, “She seems like she would make a good all American picket fence wife.”
“Maybe that’s not what I want.” He argues.
“It’s what Captain America should want.”
“Well bad deal for him because Steve Rogers likes his redheaded Russian.”
The kiss she gives him is hard and dirty as he comes undone under his ministrations. They make out for a few moments longer and then Steve goes to the bathroom to clean up. When he comes back to bed he spoons her from behind. She closes her eyes and begins to drift off when he speaks again.
“I kissed Sharon because I was pissed at you, Nat. Not because I wanted her to be Captain America’s wife or even because I wanted to fuck her. I was mad at you for taking Tony’s side so I kissed her to spite you.”
Nats shoulders shake with silent laughter, “Would it help to know it worked?”
He kisses her bare shoulder and pulls her tighter against him, “No. it makes me feel worse. I used her and hurt you. Not very Captain America of me.”
Her hand finds his and she squeezes as she turns her head back to look at him, “Just means your human Steve.”
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Iron 15 (Peter Parker x Fem! Oc)
If a few hours ago, Lily was tired, but now she’s worse. Everything is accumulating in her head. Her powers, her panic attack, the shooting, and now Phil's death. She doesn't know what to do right now.
She walks through the corridors of the ship, thinking about everything that has happened.
They were supposed to prepare me for moments like this, where someone wanted to hurt me and I could defend myself. But with the sound of a gunshot, I froze. I know I want to help, but how can I do it if I’m always afraid?
And the whole plan to use me for weapons.
Fury tried to talk to them, when he told them about Phil, Bruce's out of control, and the loss of Thor. Everything.
“We only think of Lily as a source of power as plan B. It was thought that she could give us some sample and then duplicate it. She's only in the archives, I never thought it could really be done,” was what he said. Still, she felt like a lab rat again.
Why can’t they let me in peace? These are my powers, only I can use them and if I could lend them or something like that, it’d never be to make weapons.
I should have stayed with Pepper.
"Not again,” She closes her eyes and growls when she hears the hiss, but something else happens.
She feels dizzy. Lily stops and holds onto the wall next to her until she falls to the ground. She opens her eyes and everything turns. Her powers are sharpening, she can feel something. When she closes her eyes again, her mind projects various images in no order.
A quinjet. Heaven. The tesseract. White stones. New York. The Stark tower. Loki.
Suddenly, she opens her eyes and her breath hitches.
Why on earth does she keep listening to the scepter if it is no longer around? She complains and brings her hands to her head, trying to stop the dizziness. The images went by very quickly, making everything worse. The best thing to do now is to do the breathing exercises again. And after a few minutes, she reacts by connecting the images.
"Oh my god,” She squeals in fear. "This is bad... very bad,” She gets up slowly and remembers that her father had left the control room after Fury's speech, but she doesn't know where he might be.
She walks through the halls quickly until she finds one of the agents. She asks him about her father and luckily, he tells her where he is.
When she arrives, he and Steve are about to leave.
“Dad-, I- uh, I- I saw. Loki- New York…” She says agitated.
“Wow, slow down, kid. What's going on?" Tony says.
"I know where the tesseract is!” She blurts out.
Steve and Tony share a confused look. Just before the girl arrived, they had already talked about it.
"In the Stark tower! Loki’s there too!”
"Okay, I found that out first,” says Tony. "How did you do it?"
Lily is now the confused one.
"Uh, I-" She clears her throat and tries to explain to her father everything that has happened since she was near the scepter.
"And it didn't occur to you to tell me?"
"I tried! Many times, but you wanted to impress your new friends "
“Damn it. We'll talk about this later,” She sighs. “You're getting weirder. We have work to do.”
Lily runs to the captain's side trying not to be left behind, until they reach a room where Clint Barton and Natasha should be.
"Time to go," Steve says as soon as the door opens. Natasha’s sitting on a bed.
"I'll tell you on the way.”
"Can you fly one of those jets?"
The bathroom door opens.
"I can,” says Clint
Steve looks up at Natasha for approval and she nods.
"You got a suit?"
"Then suit up.”
Lily feels the look of the redhead.
"Uh, uh. I'm still mad at you,” says the girl.
"Noup! You can’t talk to me. I ’m busy!” She says to then go out into the hallways.
"I thought you were exaggerating her resemblance to Stark," Clint says with a smile. Natasha makes a face.
As the four adults get ready, Lily watches them closely.
“Dad," She calls him on the intercom.
“What do I have to do when we get there?” In her mind the words 'I want to help' try to get out, but with her panic attack a few hours ago, she doesn't have the courage to say it.
“For now, we must know exactly what Loki is up to in the tower. I will keep you in a safe place.”
“You don't fight, you don't complain… Not even a tantrum?"
She sighs. "I suppose not.”
"Are you okay?"
"I don’t know.”
“Lily?" Steve calls her.
"See you in a bit, dad.”
The four of them walk towards the first quinjet they find. And without further ado, they use it without authorization.
In New York, Tony Stark arrives directly at his tower where Loki receives him. He tries to distract him to buy more time, but all to no avail when the portal is opened.
A beam of light shoots into the sky, letting in the alien army: the Chitauri. Thanks to Loki, the army initiates its plan to destroy everything in its path.
Iron man destroys all possible creatures, but his technology can’t win against that of the Chitauri, at least not alone. The destruction begins and people run scared to safe places. All this under the eyes of the god of mischief.
"Stark, we're on your three, headed northeast," Natasha says into Tony's intercom as the jet approaches town.
"What? Did you stop for drive throught?" Tony complains. “Swing up Park. I'm gonna lay ‘em out for you.”
The jet is piloted by Clint and Natasha, while Steve and Lily are sitting in the back. Lily has been silent the entire journey, thinking about the images that the scepter put in her mind. She knows that this is out of her reach, even her father's and that causes insecurity in her.
Her hands tremble and a slight flash illuminates her.
"Are you okay?" Steve asks looking at the girl's hands.
She looks up at him.
"I don't know, but I have to, right?"
"Don't worry, we’ll keep you safe.”
She smiles at him unsure.
Lily wants to explain many things, but this is not the time. Suddenly, they feel the movement in the jet and the noise of gunfire ahead. Clint and Natasha shoot down some enemy ships and continue until they approach the Stark tower.
"Nat?" asks Clint.
"I see them.”
From her place and from the jet's tilt, Lily can see Loki and Thor fighting, but they don't last long as they take an attack from the scepter. The ship falls and collides with other buildings. Lily clings to her seat and instinctively creates a force field, but only encloses the other three adults and her.
In the end, the ship falls awkwardly.
"Are you okay?" Steve asks and she takes off her belt and joins the others when the door opens.
The girl feels a knot in her stomach the moment she sees all the mess. She’d never been on the streets of New York and she finds it really strange that this is why she can do it for the first time.
The three adults run to observe the perimeter and the girl follows closely, but a low noise stops them. They all look towards the portal of heaven where a huge creature comes out of the portal and destroys everything in its path, more chitauris come out of it that are responsible for entering the buildings on the sides.
"Stark, are you seeing this?" says Steve.
“Seeing. Still working on believing. Where’s Banner? Has he shown up yet?"
“Just keep me posted. Flower?"
"How you doing?" She looks around her.
"I don't know, Dad. This is different from anything that has happened to us,” she says uncertainly.
From the moment Tony saw the army, his first thought went straight to his daughter. As much as he wanted to tell her to use her powers, he knows that she’s just a girl after all. He feels a great overwhelming fear with all this, he can’t imagine what she feels.
Finally, he makes a decision.
"I know, but we got this, kid."
“It's time to remember all the training you have had, but don’t leave the team.”
"Dad, I can’t!" She squeals.
"Yes, you can, Lily. Trust me, I have a plan,” He then cuts off communication and tries to take down the new monster.
"Oh god," says Lily, controlling her nausea.
"Lily!" Nat calls when she sees the alien ships approaching.
The four of them hide behind some abandoned taxis. Steve, Nat and Clint agree to protect civilians to continue destroying the Chitauri. Lily hears their voices, explosions and screams in the distance. A loud beep settles in her ears and she can feel her temperature rising.
"Hey, hey,” Nat nudges her shoulder a little, making her return from her thoughts. "Lils, look at me,” the girl's eyes water, but she obeys. "Listen, you got this.”
"No, I got nothing, Nat,” She shakes her head.
"You have trained for this moment.”
"That is not true. At no point did you tell me what to do if an alien tries to kill me!” she complains.
"Well, that's true. But they didn't tell me something like that either when they trained me, that's not the real problem,” She says and holds Lily's hand. "You and I know that you have a greater power. Lily, you are much stronger than you think.”
Although the redhead's words help the panic attack, the girl is still not sure.
"Good, that’ll keep you alive,” She smiles. "I'm scared too, we all are, but the difference is that we can use it to help defenseless people. You are not alone, kid. You're part of the team and we’ll find a place where you can be safe.”
She analyzes her words. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. Her hearing heightens and all the memories of the training return. Use fear to my advantage? She thinks when she opens her eyes.
“You're better?" The girl nods. "Alright, time to work.” Natasha gets up and shoots at the Chitauri.
Lily continues to focus on her breathing and the tingling that now runs throughout her body. She looks up and sees Clint helping some people out of a bus from the windows. She gets up and runs to help. She looks for the door, which is being obstructed, she recognizes the damage and with force manages to open it. People run in search of a safe place.
Clint comes to her side and nods at her.
"I'm Lily, by the way," She says with an awkward smile. Clint smiles.
"A pleasure,” he answers and then returns to Nat.
Lily watches carefully as the Chitauri gather, ready to attack. I’m too small for this she thinks. At that an explosion is heard near her. Her eyes travel to the expanding cloud of smoke. That reminds her of the force fields.
What if I make one, but different? Instead of protecting, burning…
Not far away a group of aliens point their weapons at anyone who gets in their way. Lily looks at her hands and concentrates her power from there and then spreads it through her body. She imagines smoke, fire, and the chitauri.
When she opens her eyes, they turn from brown to deep orange. She feels the fire run through her body ready to leave, she takes a step and extends her arms towards the enemy. What she started as a force field turns into a thick layer of orange smoke and she heads towards the Chitarui without giving them time to flee. The smoke burns them almost to ashes.
When finished, Lily falls to her knees and sits on the floor trying to catch her breath. She feels her body weakening, but at the same time she recognizes certain parts of her more strongly. It's something new.
"That's my girl,” Nat congratulates with a smile. Lily turns and smiles noticing that even Steve had witnessed her attack. The three adults look at her proudly.
"Remind me never to make you mad, kid," Clint jokes.
At that a loud thunder is heard. Thor disposes of some creatures from the sky and falls close to them.
“Nice job, Lady Stark. How can you manipulate fire?"
“We'll need more time to explain Lily's powers, for now, we have other things to do,” says Nat as she helps the girl up.
@silenthappyplace@yourbonesaremybody@aylauwuuniverse@skittles-skittles @hufflepuffzutara @poetryislife0715@21bruhs @heavenlymistakes @my-love-of-books @dielgonacoffee @thelastpyle @aconfusedslytherin @scarlet-marie @letsfly-andbe-free
@heavenlymistake @number0hero @aconfusedslytherin
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Kiss the Bride // Chris Evans
Summary: He should've objected when he had the chance.
Warnings: kind of angsty
All the times he'd held you were washing down the drain. It was over. For real this time.
Chris watched as you walked gracefully down the aisle, wearing the dress you'd picked out for the wedding you thought you'd be having with him. He'd seen it all. He remembered when you showed him the binder full of your wedding plans. You never prioritized a wedding, but you'd always wanted to be prepared. You'd picked out everything from the color of the flower petals to the pin you'd put in your hair. Everything was all there. Except for him. His heart sunk when you locked eyes with him. He felt sick. Was this how it ended? With you walking down the aisle to another man as he sat there helplessly? He had to look away from you because this was the day you'd always dreamed of. How dare he ruin this for you? Just because he fucked everything up. It wouldn't be fair to you.
He watched the ceremony. It was beautiful. It was perfect for you. He felt nauseous the entire time. He couldn't decide if he should leave or stay. He wanted to choke out the groom and confess his love for you, but he couldn't. It was too late. As the two of you exchanged vows, Chris had to fight the urge to stop the wedding right then. This was what you'd always dreamed of.
"Is there anyone who objects to this marriage?"
He could've sworn you looked at him. You stared him dead in the eye. Was it a sign? A call for help? Were you asking him to speak up?
"Speak now or forever hold your peace."
He could hear you calling to him. You were begging him to save you. Right? Of course not. You were happy. This was good for you. You deserved this more than anyone he'd ever met. He stayed silent. He let himself lose. It was over.
The reception was beautiful. Exactly how you'd planned it. He smiled lightly at the ice sculpture of swans in the shape of hearts that you'd always dreamed of having at your special day. He'd always hated the idea of it.
"It's tacky, (Y/N). Too predictable."
"Oh, come on, Chris. It's beautiful. If you don't like it, I'm sure someone else will," you'd tease.
Chris sighed at the sculpture and wondered if your husband liked it.
He turned around and his heart stopped. He was sure his lungs would collapse at any second.
You were standing right in front of him. Beautiful as ever. He could've sworn angels had started singing, but he was too far gone for angels to be near him. He didn't deserve for you to be near him anymore. He'd lost that privilege.
You weren't quite sure what to say to him. You weren't even sure why you went to talk to him. Your feet seemed to have started moving before you could stop them. Now, you were standing right in front of him speechless. You couldn't tell if you were heartbroken or angry.
How could he just let this happen? Why didn't he say anything? Did he even care?
Whatever the answers were, they didn't matter anymore. It was over with. There was no hope at this point.
"The wedding was beautiful, (Y/N). Congratulations," he commented, smiling. You smiled back as brightly as you could manage, hoping he wouldn't notice just how much of a show you were putting on.
Why were you even speaking to him? You had nothing to say to him.
"Enjoy the party," you told him with a smile. "Thank you so much for coming."
You held your hand out to him and inwardly cringed. When did the two of you become so fucking formal? He stared for a moment with his hands shoved in his pockets before finally grabbing your hand in his and shaking it. What the hell was that?
You smiled one last time before turning away from him.
"(Y/N)," he called. He sounded desperate. Like he was begging you to turn around You wanted to kill him. He lets you marry someone else and then calls your name with that much hopelessness in his voice? How fucking dare he?
"I should have spoke up. Right? It wasn't just me?"
He was fidgeting with his hands. Peeling at his nails. You sighed and turned to look at him. You strode back over and grabbed his hands to force him to stop.
His eyes were nervous and fearful. What if he'd read this all wrong? What if you were happy and he was standing here ruining that?
"I wish you would have," you told him, pushing yourself on your toes to kiss his cheek. "But, you didn't. And neither did I. I'm sorry."
There it was.
It was officially over.
He knew that as you gave him one last defeated smile and walked over to your new husband.
There was no hope.
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When he left
All the pretty girls like Bucky - Steve Masterlist - Full Masterlist
Summary: Continuation of All the pretty girls like Bucky. Steve gets a chance to be the man he dreamed to be. That does mean leaving behind all he already has.
Based on THIS request.
Pairing: 40s Skinny Steve x Fem!Reader
Word count: 846
Warning: Angst, Steve and reader breaking up respectfully, a lil’ bit of fluff.
‘A project?’ Steve nods excitedly and looks at you with stars in his eyes. You’ve only seen him like this once before. On the day he asked you to be his girlfriend. It meant the world to him, which makes you think this means the world to him too. And to be fair, it hurts.
You knew he wanted to fight in the war, make a change in this terrible world, but you didn’t think it would run this deep. Only last week Bucky informed you Steve had been trying to enlist as Steve from different states, just to get a second chance. Of course, his asthma didn’t help at all and he got declined each and every time.
He had always been protective over you. He had gotten into fights over you. Fights that Bucky would have to pull him out of because he couldn’t finish them. Steve had always thought he was bigger than he actually was. You admired that about him but sometimes he was very stupid.
‘Yeah, they think I am the perfect candidate.’ With those lights in his eyes who are you to deny his dreams? You couldn’t bear to dim those lights. After all, you worked so hard to let them shine again. So you nod with tears in your eyes. He watches you with a confused look in his eyes. He can tell you’re happy, yet there’s this sadness about you.
‘Steve, I can’t do this anymore.’ Admitting that might be the hardest thing you’ve ever done. You wanted Steve to be the best he could ever be but you would’ve never thought being the best man would take him away from you. And now that it has come to that point, it hurts. You know he might not come back to you.
‘W-what do you mean?’ Suddenly, he’s Steve from the bar again. The Steve you had watched for weeks, uncertain if you should make a move. Damn, this is hard.
‘I know you’re meant for great things, Steve. I really do. But I just hoped those things would keep you here. With me.’ Your words seem to hold little weight to them. At least not to him.
‘Y/n, men are laying down their lives on the battlefield. Who am I to do any less than they do?’ You shrug as you feel the first of many tears slip onto your cheek.
‘I don’t know. A husband to a wife? A father to a son?’ Any weight your words might’ve had slips through your fingers. You know that’s not what Steve wants. At least not right now.
‘Y/n, there’s something so much more important happening right now.’ There’s a fire in his eyes and who are you to deny him a fighting chance? You smile through your tears, knowing you won’t be able to talk him down from this, and nod.
‘You’re right. There are things much more important than us out there. So maybe, there shouldn’t be an us right now.’ He freezes.
‘What do you mean?’ Your words fail, your movements are frantic as you try to explain what you mean but the words come and go.
‘I mean- Well- Damn- I mean we shouldn’t- No- I-’
‘You think we should break up?’ You freeze up as he did just seconds ago. There’s a ton of bricks on your shoulders. You don’t want to break up with Steve. You want to start a family, be happy together, build a legacy. And your shoulders fall, your breath leaves your lungs. This might be the hardest thing you’ve ever done because you truly love Steve.
‘I don’t but if your wish is to fight in the war, then I don’t want to be the woman who waits on the man who doesn’t come back.’ You watch tears slip out of his eyes as he seats himself on the small sofa in your shared apartment. His head falls in his hands and you hear him sob. You sit down next to him and rub his back but you know it’ll do nothing. His head lifts from his hands.
‘You’re right,’ he tells you, ‘I shouldn’t make you wait for me.’
‘I wish you did.’
‘I couldn’t do that to you. Not when I love you so much.’
‘Come back with a ring and we’ll pretend this conversation never happened.’ He smiles at you and presses a kiss on your cheek.
‘But then he didn’t come back. He got frozen, right?’ Wanda holds a picture of you in a pretty dress and Steve in his uniform at his department in her hands. Bucky shakes his head and takes the picture from her hands. He reads the back and smiles.
“The most handsome soldier I’ve ever seen.”
‘He rarely got to write to her,’ Bucky explains, ‘she didn’t know what was going on most of the time and she never got to write back because he was moving around so fast. I doubt she knew Steve went into the ice.’
‘So what came of her?’
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Hi! Sorry to hear you’re not feeling well. I was wondering if you’d want to write something for whoa bessie where Bucky has flashbacks and Steve is torn between wanting to help as a partner or as a therapist?
This is a really good one. Thank you.
It's only June, and some kid from the apartment complex has the gall to light a firecracker somewhere in the grassy space between their window and the swimming pool.
It's not even a nice day to play outside. Steve's first instinct is to pull back the blinds and look angrily out the window to see what the fuck is going on out there.
James, who's already on the couch with a headache, takes the opposite approach. "Ohmygod," he mutters, pulling his head to his knees so quickly that the throw pillow and afghan fall to the floor.
"Buck?" Steve whips back around, the situation outside now forgotten.
"I--no--" James pulls his arm over his head. Steve can hear him gritting his teeth.
"Buck, it's alright." Steve tries to sit on the edge of the sofa, but James writhes, and he takes up a position on his knees on the floor instead. He hovers his hand over James's shoulder, waiting to see if the touch is warranted. He needs to ground him. Bring him back to the here and now.
"No, there's never only one shooter," James spits in a pained whisper. "It's a... thing they do. Confuse us." He reaches out suddenly and swipes Steve in the face with his elbow. "Get down."
"James," Steve says. "Buck. You're not over there." He needs to ground him; to calm him.He thinks of the cold packs in the mini fridge in the corner of his office. Then of the xanax James is supposed to keep in his pocket, but more often than not is in a bottle on the bedside table.
But what is he thinking? James hates cold; he was tortured in buckets of icy water. And he bites if anything's forced in his mouth, even the syringe containing his seizure rescue meds.
"Bucky," Steve sighs, finally pressing his hand down on James's stump shoulder. "You're safe. No one's shooting at you."
"Listen." Steve practically holds his breath. 'Hear anything now?"
James digs at his hearing aid for a moment, then pauses. "N-no..."
"It's ok. You got scared." Steve takes the blanket from the floor and slips his arm around James's back, wrapping it securely around him. "Are you warm enough?" The air conditioner is on, and he doesn't want James mistaking it for the draft in a prison cell god-knows-where.
"D'you want me to sit with you?" Steve sinks down so he's kneeling in a more comfortable position. He pushes a strand of limp hair off James's forehead.
"Do you mind?" James looks pleadingly at Steve. "Sometimes it's hard to, you know. Stay here. In my head, I mean."
"I know. I don't mind. I'll stay forever."
"Till I'm ready to get up..." James closes his eyes.
"Yeah, maybe don't take forever."
"I won't." A smile flickers on James's face. "But it might take... a while."
"I can do a while," Steve says. "That would be just fine."
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Peter and bus for the prompt game please! If possible would you be able to have him throwing up and include tony or Steve? Thank you! Also happy birthday!
"Why are we taking public transportation?" Peter groans, leaning his forehead against the window of the bus. He's in civilian clothes, and Steve sits beside him in a very unconvincing buttondown and baseball cap.
"Because that's the best way to hit this mark," Steve says. "I could've sworn Tony already told you this."
Now that he thinks about it, Mr. Stark did already tell him this. Peter just wants out of the crowded tin can rattling them along toward the center of Harlem.
"You have your suit and your webs ready, though, right?" Steve asks, nodding toward Peter's backpack stowed between his feet.
"What?" Peter looks Steve's way. "Oh, yeah..."
"Because once we hit the building, there's not going to be a lot of time..."
Peter tunes him out after that. The bus goes over a bump that sends his stomach into his throat. He feels as if he's suffocating. He uses his sleeve to wipe clammy sweat off his face, then off the bus's cloudy window.
"Are you listening?"
"Yeah." The bus screeches to a halt at the next stop, and Peter breathes a sigh of relief. He sucks in air and basks in the stillness of everything for a moment.
"Well, you're probably going to have to go after multiple assailants while I block return fire."
The bus pulls away from the curb with enough speed to force Peter back in his seat. He swallows as quickly as he can, tasting bile on the back of his tongue.
He must've gone pale or something, for Steve asks, "Are you ok?
"Um, can you just, like, stop for a second?" Peter chokes back. "I need to concentrate..." He puts both hands over his mouth and breathes slowly. The back of the seat in front of him suddenly becomes very interesting to look at.
It doesn't hold for long, though. As soon as the bus turns a corner, Peter's focus is broken, and everything spills up into his mouth. He can't hold it in, and vomit runs between his fingers and out the sides.
"I'm sorry," Peter says, his voice raspy and muffled, just before he gags again.
"Ok." Steve gets to his feet, swinging Peter's backpack over one shoulder and his own over the other. He reaches over Peter's head and yanks on the string to stop the bus. "We're getting off here. I'm going to call for backup."
"No," Peter complains, but he can't control yet another retch.
"Yes," says Steve. "You'll have another chance. On a day when you're feeling better."
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Joining in @ao3commentoftheday Six Sentence Sunday - from current Captain America ongoing WIP The Long Way Home.
Steve just about jumped out of his skin.
"What the hell, Bucky! How? I didn't hear you..."
Steve's perpetually-concerned frown reappeared and on that big face seemed slightly comical to Bucky for reasons he couldn't articulate.
"Clearly not everything got enhanced."
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S N O W M A N — BUCKY BARNES X OC (CHAPTER 1)
❝If we are both alone, then les us be alone together❞ ||BUCKY BARNES X OC
INTRODUCTION: For Lexie Petrov, life had to be the scariest thing she had ever faced. She threw the bad, the good, all her way until she could barely stand. Until she was shattered, without hope and without faith. Life scared her. It was cruel for as long as he could remember, but somehow after deciding to reunite with the incredible - and not unequal - duo of Bucky Barnes and San Wilson on a mission, life was different.
[DISCLAIMER] Most named characters and settings belong to TFATWS an exception of the protagonist and some more.
[COPYRIGHT] All rights reserved, copying or adaptation of the novel without prior notice to the author is PROHIBITED.
[WARNING] In this fanfic topics are discussed which requires certain maturity: Explicit language, violence, death and sex. If you are not prepared to read I recommend you don't do it.
[NOTE] English is not my first language, sorry for the mistakes. Very excited to share this story with you, I originally posted it on wattpad, but it was really frustrating to note that it didn't seem to attract attention. Let's not focus on that, but on the now, new beginnings in Tumbrl (I still don't know how works lmao)
WORD COUNT: 2,1k
PART ONE | CHAPTER ONE
OMNISCIENT POINT OF VIEW
Manhattan, New York | Lex's new apartment
Obviously what he saw before his eyes was a dream. After all, how could reality be when the man in front of her was gone? Steve was gone, he had made the decision to leave and he was not coming back.
So how was it possible for him to be in front of her? Breathing? Smiling? Alive?
Without waiting any longer for him, stretching out his hand, the captain took it, entangling his fingers with his before drawing her to him and leaving a soft kiss on her forehead.
"Don't leave me Steve" murmured the black-haired woman wrapping her arms around the blonde's body.
The surrounding landscape of the beautiful Wakanda lands began to disappear, leaving destruction in its wake. More specifically the scenario of how the earth had been after the war with Thanos. Aleksandra moved away from Rogers to look around terrified, when she turned her gaze to the blonde, he released her hand and walked away.
"Steve! Please don't leave me! Steve!" Sobbing, I try to move towards him but his feet seemed stuck to the ground, the man did not stop, continuing on his way without looking back until he disappeared.
Petrov sat bolt upright, snapping back to reality. He got up from his bed and walked to the bathroom, where he washed his face before leaning on the sink, the touch of Steve's hand moving away from hers still itched.
He took a few minutes to calm down, his heart was racing, his mind kept replaying the nightmare over and over again. Sighing, he looked at his reflection, it had never looked so bad. Her skin was too pale except for the large purplish circles under her eyes, her parched lips, she was haggard.
Without wasting time, she opened the counter under the sink and opened it, rummaging through the beauty products for some masks. The image of Natasha crossed his mind, memories of the nights they spent together trying all kinds of masks and face products in search of smoother skin.
An hour later, after several different treatments to try to fix her skin, she came out of the bathroom, patches with hyaluronic acid under her eyes to reduce her dark circles.
Not wanting to go through the same nightmare again, she headed for the living room, more specifically the small bar area. She took a glass and filled it with whiskey, before bringing it to his lips to drink.
She opened the balcony of his apartment to watch the night, another loaded glass was in his hand. When the moon was at its highest and all the lights of the city illuminated the streets of New York, it was something truly spectacular, one of the landscapes that the black-haired woman enjoyed.
The sound of your phone, the alert of the arrival of a message. He took a long drink of his whiskey before going inside to get it. When he found it, he unplugged it from the charger and returned to the balcony where he took a seat on the comfortable sofa that was kept in one corner.
Lexie? 03:37 a. M.
LEX: Nightmares? 03:39 AM
I guess you too ... 03:39 AM
LEX: Do you want to talk about it? 03:40 AM
I don't, you? 03:40 a. M.
LEX: Sincerely? I would rather not do it. 03:41 AM
Aleksandra smiled, without waiting for an answer she pressed the phone logo, calling him. Bucky, like her, suffered from night terrors, not the same ones, of course. But it was good, almost comforting to have someone who could somehow understand what it felt like.
"Hey stranger. How are you?" He mumbled as soon as the call was answered.
"Lexie, hi. Good and you?"
"Well, I'm glad you're okay James. So tell me, what exactly are you doing up at this hour?
They kept talking for an hour maybe more, late-night talks that have become a habit between them for the last six months, the routine was the same. When you wanted to get away from those demons that tormented you, you would write a message, if it was answered, a call would follow. Usually Bucky was the one to send the message first, Aleksandra replied. Neither knew exactly what the other was dreaming about, just some details here and there, James dreamed of his past as a murderer and Lexie of Steve. They didn't talk about it, they just needed to feel less alone.
Manhattan, New York | Dr. Spellman's office
"So Aleksandra ... how are you today?"
Meredith Spellman recognized to the world as one of the best therapists, recognized for Lexie as a pain in the butt.
"Lexie, Lex or Alex I don't like Aleksandra" murmured the avenger, curiously walking through Spellman's office.
"But that's what your name is, Aleksandra Petrova ... You may not like it, but that's what they named you" The redhead recalled carefully examining the behavior and actions of the black-haired woman.
Lexie sighed taking the Rubik's cube that was on the desk, they remained silent for a few seconds when they saw that the professional had opened his notebook to start writing, the black-haired woman spoke; "The people who named me like that no longer exist, Aleksandra Petrova died a long time ago, precisely 10 years ago, when she left Oymyakon. I promised to myself not to call me like that again."
The redhead nodded, she was patient, she knew that Alexandra was a very closed person so she would not pressure her, but would encourage her to continue, to move on. In his file, she have observed everything that had happened in the life of Petrova
Petrova had been born in a small town in Russia into a poor family, she had been a normal girl until she was five years old, where her mother died of end-stage hepatitis C, where her liver had been severely damaged and there was nothing to do with that. Her father soon passed away a few weeks after the depression of having lost his wife, the little girl had been left in the care of her brother, who was only ten years older than her. He had been able to take care of her for a few months until the responsibility was too much, he had no way to take care of her, how to maintain her. I give it to a woman who I swear was going to protect her. Little did the teenager know that this woman was a Hydra scientist who had taken her sister to an experimental plantation on the outskirts of her village. In this laboratory they injected drugs and experimented with children to mass-produce weapons that would serve their cause for years to come. Aleksandra, being one of the few to survive the tests for two years, had attracted the attention of her superiors, who did not hesitate to put her in a new program, the project (снежная буря), which was successful. Petrova spent ten years of her childhood and adolescence, being raised and trained, undergoing intense daily training every day, which included training in hand-to-hand combat, weapons training, tactical skills and above all the management of her skills with the ice, powers granted thanks to the project snowstorm. In 2013, the organization was dismantled by Steve Rogers, who proposed the minor to join him, Alexandra agreed instead of remaining part of Hydra, defected from Russia and joined the ranks of SHIELD, later joined the Avengers Initiative to be led by Captain America.
"I know, I know ... the sad story of the orphan, who was abandoned and subjected to experiments, blah blah blah" Meredtih looked up from the file she was reading to observe her patient, who had managed to assemble all the cubes of rubik that was on his desk. "I'm over that, okay? I'm not here for that, so skip that part.
"So why are you here?"
"Why does the government want to keep me under control to prevent me from having a psychotic episode and killing an innocent person?" The avenger proposed ironically, lying on the long brown sofa in front of her psychologist.
"Are you going to do something like that?"
"Of course not!"
"Alex ... I'm going to be frank with you, it's the fifth session and we still haven't progressed beyond the presentation, what little I know, I know thanks to your file ..." The blue-eyed just watched her. The doctor sighed adjusting her glasses before beginning to write in her notebook. "If you're not going to talk, then I'll write ... And I'm going to order more therapy, not just with me, I want you to go to at least three more psychiatrists."
"Well, you win. I'll talk" The black-haired girl accepts resignedly before sitting down properly. "Look, I understand that I am lucky to be here, because I know that I have been through a lot. So we can do this quickly, save you all the paperwork and I waste the time of sitting in front of three more people to tell them about my life. . "She sincerely blurted out, looking at the different letters on the table with her emotions looking for one with which she feels represented, she took one and showed it to Meredith who narrowed her eyes when reading it. "Bored, this is how I feel right now."
"Is this how you feel? How strange, because your expressions, your behavior transmits other types of information to me. Your tense and defensive posture, the change in the tone of your voice, the way you rub your sweaty hands against your jacket ... "Lexie chuckled crossing her arms, watching as Meredith jotted down a few things before speaking again; "The vast majority of the soldiers with whom I have dealt, are bothered by the mandatory therapy, at first they never manage to understand it, but believe me, when they leave that door after having completed the sessions, they come out healthy, happy. You may not believe in my now Alex, but I want nothing more than to help you. "
The blue-eyed nodded, "Look, I understand that it's okay to attend to heal. I know the exercise, I don't need the motivational talk. I just ... I just know that the sessions shouldn't last long. You can ask me some questions, fix me up and leave me feeling like new. I have taken care of big things, and this is definitely not that. "
"I have read the reports of your previous therapist Alex ... but since that, a lot has happened to you, you have faced aliens, you were in many battles, you lost a lot of people for five years, then they came back but in the same way, win the war could not be done without sacrifice, and above all it has not prevented you from losing people you considered your family. " List the redhead as briefly as possible. "I can't believe you consider those little things."
"Doc ... have you really read my report?" Petrov asked, denying with amusement, before beginning to list his misfortunes. "My parents died, my brother abandoned me when I was five years old, they experimented with me for ten years, during which I killed many innocents. That file of mine is a real trauma, but I have known it, terrible things happen every day and that I have adding a few more losses to my list, it's just a little thing. "
"Tell me something Alex, do you know the stages of pain?" The therapist asks without giving an opinion about what was said before by her patient.
"Of course I do. I can explain it to you in less time than you expect." She said proudly, leaning back, accommodating herself better on the sofa.
"Okay ..." Meredith accepts smiling before adding; "I promise to end the consultation, if you can tell me the stages and what it is for in a minute or less."
"Are you sure?" At Spellman's nod, Lexie sighed, rubbing her hands together. "The stages of pain are five, that of Denial, that of Indifference or Anger, the negotiation phase, the phase of emotional pain and finally, the Acceptance class. They usually last between six months and a year when it deals with the loss of a close loved one. In the event that the symptoms do not cease after these periods of time, the affected person may be suffering an episode of chronic depression ".
"So close ... but you didn't make it"
"What ?! I did say it before the minute is up!" the avenger yells annoyed, crossing her arms.
"Alex, I don't deny it. You've explained it perfectly, almost out of a dictionary, but you haven't said anything about the part where these stages are going to help you overcome your trauma."
Lexe denies multiple times, it was nothing like that. "Something horrible has happened to me in my life, I understand it, but I repeat it again, I have lived worse things, I have overcome it."
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Little Blue Ribbons (Requested Extension)
Summary: Steve returns four years later to you after regretting his decision to remain in the past with Peggy. He did not expect his mistake to result in finding you pregnant by his best friend and that he had unknowingly abandoned you when you were carrying his sons. (A requested extended chapter set after Chapter 6.)
Pairings: Steve Rogers x Mutant!Reader, Bucky Barnes x Mutant!Reader
Warnings: 18+ ONLY. CONTAINS SMUT. oral, fingering, semi-public sex, pregnant!reader sex, breeding kink, pining (you should expect this by now)
A/N: This took a while because I was so undecided on how to end things, but here we are. Dedicated to the nonnie who asked what happens to Steve after he returns and if he would ever have a relationship with his sons. Thank you for sending that request. I enjoyed revisiting this series.
Also dedicated to @milkyway-writes and @pigwidgeonxo who have been VERY vocal about their support for this extension. You’re both amazing people. Special mention to @its-my-little-dumpster-fire for the special scene inclusion. I tried my best.
No permission is granted to repost, translate, or steal my work. Tumblr is the only place I post my writing. If you see it anywhere else please report it.
Bucky asked Steve to stay in one of the separate cabins away from the main building where you all resided until you and the boys agreed to see him. That was six weeks ago. During the agonizing wait, Steve had time to thoroughly beat himself up about what a complete idiot he was. The beautiful reunion he imagined in his head was so filled with resentment and pain that it tore at him. He realized that it was unfair of him to expect that you would just forgive him and take him back. That was what you always did before and he had taken it for granted.
He had taken you for granted.
There was so much that he was now deeply regretful of, belated as it was. He didn’t even know where to begin to fix things. Perhaps the heaviest on his mind were the boys, those beautiful twin boys that looked like the perfect mixture of you both. His pride told him he should be mad at you too for not telling him you were pregnant, but the shame quickly tamped that back down. What right did he have when he himself didn’t tell you about his own intentions of staying in the past with Peggy?
How many times had he hurt you with Peggy? How many times had he chosen Peggy and even Sharon over you? Over and over again he had hurt you and you had stood by him, allowing him to find his happiness at the expense of yours. You were too good for him and he didn’t even see that.
He wept every day for the first three weeks and it took all of his willpower not to march into the main house and see you. He knew better though than to jeopardize probably the only opportunity he will ever have to rebuild any semblance of a relationship with you and your sons. Of all the loss Steve Rogers has experienced in his long life, this had to be the most painful and the most difficult to swallow. He wasn’t even sure if his guilt was worth anything at this point. He was too late.
He was much too late.
In the fourth week, Bucky came to visit him and Steve felt hopeful for a moment thinking that maybe you would see him now. He was sorely disappointed. The brunette shook his head, his eyes a mix of sadness and disappointment. The blonde slumped and trudged his way to the sofa, burying his face in his hands and groaning in defeat.
Steve took a moment to just steady himself before meeting his best friend’s steely eyes again. He remembered that there was more than just you and the boys that he should be making amends with.
“I’m sorry, Buck.”
“Aren’t you mad at me?”
“Why are you talking to me at all then?”
Bucky sighed and moved to sit on the armchair, his elbows on his thighs as he leaned forward. “Because I know you took all the stupid with you. You’re a goddamn idiot, Stevie.”
“I know,” he groaned, frustrated tears edging in his eyes. “They want nothing to do with me, huh? I deserve that.”
Bucky took a good hard look at his best pal. He was furious at him and understandably so. He was the one who was left to pick up the pieces of what he so carelessly broke. He was the one who held you when you had nightmares. He was the one who made sure you were taking care of yourself and the babies. He was the one who acted like a father to the boys.
He was the one who loved you when you felt that you weren’t worth loving.
He made you believe in life again, but looking at Steve’s state right now he knew that the regret was already drowning him. He couldn’t say he wasn’t at least a little bit glad that Steve was wallowing in guilt. Having watched over the boys for four years, he knew that they should have a chance to get to know their father. None of them thought that they would be able to have it, but they had that choice now. As much as he would like to beat up Steve about what happened, there was too much history between the three of you for it to be that simple. Underneath all of it, you were still those kids who grew up in Brooklyn together.
In the sixth week, Bucky came back with better news. He led Steve to the main common room, from outside the door he could hear you and the boys and it made him stop dead in his tracks. He was nervous, deathly so, but a push from Bucky had him within your line of sight. Anton, the angry blonde twin, immediately stood in front of you in a defensive stance.
The little boy growled at his father.
“Anton, what did we talk about?” Bucky said sternly from beside Steve. He sighed when the boy just won’t let up. “Give me a second with them, pal.”
Steve watched as the boy’s eyes softened at Bucky’s approach. He watched him launch himself and cling onto his vibranium arm before he was lifted to settle on his hip. It was evident that they did this a lot. You approached them then, the other boy perched on your own hip, and pressed a kiss to the corner of Bucky’s mouth. He watched from the doorway as you all spoke quietly to each other, hands comfortably touching each other’s skin. The four of you looked like the perfect picture of a family and it made Steve’s heart ache painfully.
He could have had that.
After what felt like hours, Bucky waved him over. To be honest he wanted to leave. He felt like an outsider and he didn’t want to ruin any further the peace that you all had worked hard on building, but this was his only shot. The kids were on the floor now, one still staring at him in anger while the other with deep curiosity.
“We’ve talked to the kids. They know who you are.”
“They know everything,” you interrupted Bucky. Steve looked at you but you wouldn’t meet his eyes, choosing instead to fuss over the boys. You were so beautiful. Even more beautiful than he remembered. Maybe that was because he never really took the time to look at you like he did now. Maybe it was the glow from your pregnancy that you were only slightly showing at this stage. Maybe it was from being surrounded by love. He should have done that for you. He should have made you glow with happiness.
“It’s their choice, Steve. Roman says he needs to touch you before he makes his decision.”
He nodded his head quickly, squatting down to his son’s height. Bucky had told him a bit about the boys beforehand and explained the powers he had seen that day he returned. He experienced firsthand Anton’s intense ice powers and a small part of Roman’s telepathic abilities. He thought they were incredible and he couldn’t be more proud. That was one thing he did right.
Roman gingerly approached his father and placed his hands on both sides of his face, staring unblinkingly at him. Steve staggered back a bit as he felt the telltale signs of someone creeping in his mind, it was disorienting but somehow it also didn’t feel threatening. He felt almost hypnotized as familiar memories flashed before him and suddenly he understood what his child was trying to do.
Will you leave us again, papa?
He heard in his mind. This small child was trying to protect the family he had abandoned, trying to make sure that before they let him back in that he wouldn’t hurt them again by leaving. Steve’s heart shattered and the tears fell in large drops down his face. He felt so ashamed of himself. He shook his head quickly and fixed his watery eyes determinedly on Roman.
“I’m not going anywhere, buddy. Never again.”
Steve looked to Anton, saying with his eyes what his throat was too tight to repeat. He felt relief when the other boy looked a fraction less aggressive toward him. Then he looked at you and you couldn’t stop your own tears from falling. You believed his regret, you believed his desire to rebuild bridges.
It was enough for now.
“It’s okay, mama,” Roman said softly as he returned to your side and took your hand. They had decided they would give Steve a chance.
It started off with supervised visits in the Compound. Steve was allowed to spend time with his kids with you and Bucky nearby, far enough that they could bond without interruption and near enough in case they needed to intervene. Usually it was in the main common room that he sat with his children, telling them stories of Brooklyn and past battles while they showed him their skills.
They were slow to open up to him, particularly Anton but when they started it was like the dam broke and you just couldn’t get them to shut up. They launched into a million questions about the first Avenger that warmed Steve’s heart and gave him hope. It was the highlight of his life when both kids first allowed him to give them a hug good night. It was the happiest he has ever felt and he was filled with a deep gratitude for being granted this opportunity.
It was a testament to your motherhood how well the boys grew up. They were happy children with a zest for life and a remarkable control over their abilities. Steve noticed how Anton was so much like you with his fiery temper, but he got his bullheaded nature. Roman inherited his quick strategic mind and observation skills that would put any grown operative to shame, but he also got your empathy. It wasn’t just the two of you, their time spent with Bucky had a clear influence on them with their bouts of playfulness.
They were perfect.
He was content with what he was allowed to have. It was more than he deserved, but still he couldn’t help his eyes flitting to you and filling with longing. He saw how Bucky doted on you, more so now that you were carrying his child. He took any task he could from you and made it his mission to ensure you were comfortable. He was also openly affectionate, always with a hand to support your back and sweet lingering kisses on your face. His heart clenched every time you smiled and softly looked at Bucky the way you used to with him, but he couldn’t seem to look away.
He wasn’t angry that you had found love with Bucky. If anything he was relieved that it was Bucky. If there was anyone who could love you the way you deserved, make you happy the way he didn’t, it was Bucky. He would give anything to not have made the mistakes he did. He would give anything to have even an eighth of your love back.
One afternoon, Steve came into the main common room. He heard you and Bucky talking, alarmed at the slight worried edge in your voice. His heart stopped when he saw you. Bucky had both hands on your shoulders, rubbing up and down to soothe you. You had on a sundress that flowed softly around you and complimented your figure. Light makeup was on your face, just enough to emphasize the glow you already had. Your little blue ribbons in your hair made him swallow hard.
You were so gorgeous it hurt.
“What’s wrong?” Steve managed to ask.
You didn’t look at him, but Bucky gave him a small sad smile. “We were supposed to go on a date, but the babysitter bailed last minute.”
It was an easy decision for Steve especially with that look of disappointment on your face. “I can watch the boys.”
Your head turned abruptly to Steve and the growing smile on your face made him feel warm. It made him feel like he was finally doing something right for you. Your happiness had a decided weight to him now.
“You sure you can handle them by yourself, pal?” Bucky asked. Underneath the question was another; are you okay with this? As happy as Bucky was, he didn’t necessarily want to rub it in his best friend’s face.
“We’ll be fine,” Steve reassured him with a small smile. “Go have fun. You guys deserve a break.”
It didn’t take any more convincing for you and Bucky to go. He had been planning this date for a while now. Both of you had been busy between missions, the boys, and your pregnancy. You were both looking forward to a rare moment alone.
It wasn’t long until Bucky drove you both out to a secluded lookout point with a view of the city. You and Bucky preferred quiet dates, away from the public eye and any kind of modern noise. It made you both feel normal and in those brief moments you were just two people in love. There was no century of the worst luck any person could possibly have, there was no pain, there were no regrets, and there was no loss. It was just you and Bucky.
You hopped out of the car, running your hands on the shiny black paint of the classic Chevy Impala while Bucky pulled out what he packed from the back. You smiled at his choice of car. It suited him so well. Normally you would have taken the Harley, but he was horrified at the idea of you on it when it was confirmed that you were with child.
“Did you seriously bring me to a make out point, Buck?” you teased, a wicked smile on your face. “You wanna make out like a couple of teenagers?”
“Hell, yeah,” he said, grabbing you by the waist to pull you to him.
Your hands automatically went around his neck as your lips met in a kiss more adult than teenager in nature. You sighed and smiled when you slowly pulled apart, his hands lazily stroking your hip.
He pulled you to the benches and perched you on his lap, reaching into the cooler to pull out the food he had prepared. You allowed him to feed you as you laughed at the stories you shared. You felt at peace and content in the arms of the man you loved, the slowly disappearing afternoon sun casting the last of its warm light on the both of you. Everything felt right and steady again. The stress from the last couple of months were temporarily pushed aside, but Bucky noticed that it wasn’t completely forgotten.
“You’re still worried about Steve,” he said quietly. You didn’t realize that you had been drifting off in your own thoughts until he spoke.
“I’m sorry,” you said, nervously gnawing on your bottom lip. You really didn’t intend to ruin your date.
“You haven’t talked to him yet.”
“I don’t know if I’m ready for that conversation yet,” you admitted. “I don’t know how I want that conversation to go. Aren’t you worried about Steve?”
He smiled softly at you as he cupped your cheek. “I’m terrified.”
His answer hit you different. Just now did you realize how strained his smile looked, that Bucky had to make an effort for the gesture. He had been putting on a brave face for you and the boys, taking the role of mediator with Steve when he was surely just as rattled by his return. The guilt filled you all at once.
“No, Bucky,” you said firmly, framing his face in both your hands to keep his eyes on you when you saw him wanting to look away. “Steve coming back doesn’t change what I feel about you.”
You shook your head when he looked like he was about to argue. “It doesn’t change how the boys feel about you either. We love you.”
You pressed your lips softly against his, a gentle reassurance of the truth before you held his gaze steadily once more. “I love you, Bucky.”
You felt him melt underneath you and you saw his eyes water before he lifted himself up to connect your lips in a kiss much more forceful than your previous one. You tasted the emotions he felt in that searing kiss; the fear of potentially losing you to Steve, the resignation if that should happen, the gratitude at your assurance, and the unending love he had for you and the family you had built together.
You clutched at each other, desperate to let the other feel in more than just words how much you mean to each other. Soon the kisses and the touching turned heated, your bodies calling out to the other in need of affirmation. You shifted yourself around to straddle him and he groaned low against your mouth when you pressed your hips down hard.
“I’m not gonna make it home if you keep doing that, doll.”
He completely stilled beneath you and frowned. “What? No. You’re pregnant and -”
His eyes widened as he looked up at you, but seeing the determined lust-filled look on your face was swaying him. The threatening flash of icy blue in your eyes convinced him. You weren’t going to take no for an answer. The growl reverberated in his chest as he captured your lips with his again. He carried you with little effort, his lips traveling down to suck and bite on your neck. You were so lost in the delicious way his mouth was going down your clavicle and the tight grip he had on your ass that you barely registered the smooth leather of the back seat of the Impala against your back.
It was clumsy how you both tugged and practically ripped each other’s clothes off, desperate to feel skin against skin. When finally the barriers were torn away, you maneuvered yourself to lie on your back and slipped your head between his legs before he could even realize what you were doing. You took his balls in your mouth and pumped his hard length quickly, his precum dripping onto your hand.
“Goddamn, doll!” he shouted, gripping the seat to hold himself up above you. “You that hungry for my cock?”
You moaned against his skin, your tongue tracing patterns and your mouth sucking until he was panting above you. You slid down a bit to take his cock in your mouth, hollowing your cheeks to better suck him off. You loved going down on Bucky. He was always so vocal about his pleasure and it was always a sure way to get him to give in to whatever you wanted.
“Jesus, you’re really going to town,” he groaned, bucking his hips to go further into your eager mouth. His hands reached over, squeezing your breasts before going further down to your aching cunt. “God, you’re soaking. You need my cock right here, doll?”
You could only whine and grind your cunt against his hand, squeezing tight when he slipped his fingers inside and started a frenzied pace. Bucky couldn’t hold back anymore when he felt you start to tighten and shake, the need to feel you cum around his cock and not his fingers was too compelling. He lifted himself off you, earning loud protests from you until he was pulling you up urgently to sit on his lap.
He lined himself up against your core, running the tip against your silky folds to coat himself. You were breathing hard in anticipation, your eyes locked with each other until the sheer fulfillment of feeling him stretch you made you close your eyes in bliss. He started a slow pace, thrusting up at you languidly to make sure you were adjusting to the intrusion.
You got impatient.
You leaned back, hands going on his knees to keep yourself up as you impaled yourself on his hard length. He cussed up a storm as his hands came to hold your waist.
“You’re going to kill me one day, doll.”
“What good is the serum then?” you huffed, a teasing smile on your lips as you fucked him harder.
He growled as he watched you, enthralled by just how beautiful you looked while you took your pleasure from him. He was entranced as you proved with your body just who you belonged to. He ran a hand over your bump, still barely noticeable but Bucky noticed the differences. The rounder curves were awakening a possessive and protective nature in him that he didn’t know he had.
“You’re going to look even more beautiful when you’re fully showing,” he grunted as he began to meet your hips with his own. “I might just put another kid in you after this one comes out.”
You whined as you both picked up the pace, his words fanning the inferno in your body. He was hammering up into you now, one hand on your hip to keep you in place and the other rubbing hard at your throbbing clit. The coil was quickly winding tighter and spinning wholly out of your control.
“You want that, doll? You want me to keep you round and full with my kids?”
Your orgasm caught you off guard, not expecting the thought of Bucky breeding you to have that impact. He pulled you flush against him, his mouth closing on a hardened nub as he continued to fuck you through your release in his chase for his own. Your vision was unfocused and your body was still shaking, his arms the only thing keeping you upright. All you could do was hold on to his shoulders as you felt another orgasm build.
“Fuck! You’re squeezing me so tight,” he groaned against your breast, biting lightly at the soft flesh. “Cum with me, doll. Come on. Give me one more.”
You careened into your climax just as he spilled into you, your hips meeting harshly one last time. The small space suddenly grew quiet, your screams of pleasure reduced to ragged breathing and sloppy kisses. He rubbed your back to help calm you down, his sweaty forehead pressed against yours and your skin tingling from the heat in the car.
“Did I hurt you, doll? You okay?”
“I’m perfect,” you smiled as you kissed him again. “You’re perfect. I love you.”
“I love you, Y/N.”
This time looking into his eyes, you were relieved that you could no longer see any lingering doubt.
It was nearly midnight when you arrived back at the Compound. You both tried to keep as quiet as you could, sure that the boys would already be asleep. True enough you found your little mutants fast asleep in the living room. What you didn’t expect was to find them both piled on top of Steve who had also dozed off. Your heart clenched at the sight.
Bucky came up to wrap an arm around you and pull you against his side. You shared a look with him and knew immediately that he felt the same way. Steve looked like he belonged there.
And he did.
He belonged with his sons, but more than that he belonged with you and Bucky. It didn’t change what you felt about each other, but it forced you to face what you both felt about Steve. A century ago it had started with the three of you and during all the different times that you weren’t complete, it had always felt wrong. It had always felt like something was missing and you were always restlessly trying to fill that void.
It was always meant to be the three of you.
Whatever that entailed, you and Bucky were now ready to have that conversation with Steve. Now finally, it didn’t seem like the end of the line.
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HELPSJSNKS you got me into the “joseph rogers was abusive” theory and now i just. cannot stop wishing to find it everywhere. except! there is Nowhere Near Enough, actually, and i am Suffering™️. might have to just fuck around n write it myself, actually,
I UNDERSTAND COMPLETELY.
I have no idea what this concept isn't more prominent because it is canon in the comics, and usually the fandom takes these angsty concepts and runs (and the 'May's abusive boyfriend' trope shows that, when all else fails, the fandom will invent angsty concepts to run with). So I really have no idea why it is so hard to find content for it.
It is such an interesting dynamic to work with, especially since we know Howard was also abusive, and almost all the other Avengers have rough childhoods. Having them discover that Steve is the same, (and having Tony realise they have more in common than he previously thought) is such a good hurt/comfort/angst opportunity, I don't know why there isn't more of it.
I'm glad you like the stories I have though! I will definitely be writing more (because I too have been forced to simply create the content I want to see).
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Fanfics lovers, i need some help!
I bought a new phone and i'm looking for a way to transfer the thousand open ao3 tabs I have on my old phone to the new one 🙏🏼😂
I know "mark for later" is an option but, honestly, it's not the same and I like the mess
If anyone can help I really appreciate!!
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CHECK OUT THIS AWESOME ETSY SHOP!!
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