#the bittersweetness in the whole exchange. n it hurts so much when you think of how. how they all used to be so happy | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hoonven · 4 days

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in another life, i would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you

genres! fluff?, angst, celebrity x celebrity, ex-lovers

word count! 1380

warnings! mention of breakup, heartbreak

synopsis! in another life, you and park sunghoon are lovers, just not in this one

mimi’s note! this fic was inspired by a quote from the movie ‘everything everywhere all at once’ also I'm not very good at writing angst because I hate it but I did my best

“Congrats, big shot,” a familiar voice says from behind you, and you can hear the teasing smile in his tone, “actress of the year award, you're in the big leagues now.”

You turn around to face Park Sunghoon, a renowned figure skater and your ex-boyfriend. You haven't seen each other in almost a year but the sight of him still has the same effect on you it did all those years ago.

He's hauntingly beautiful and you're a house of horrors.

You offer a polite smile, but it's bittersweet as if you were greeting death itself.

“Congratulations to you too, you're becoming a bit of an A-list yourself since you won the Olympics.” you quip, and you both know what kind of game you're going to play tonight.

It’s the same one you always play, the one where he pretends you didn’t break his heart and you pretend everything is fine.

Sunghoon smiles at you too, like you're everything he's ever had and everything he's ever lost.

“Maybe we should exchange autographs like middle schoolers trade Pokémon cards,” he says, and you both chuckle.

“Hmm, I have a feeling mines will be more valuable.”

He playfully puts a hand over his heart. “That’s hurtful, y/n, but I can’t deny that it’s also true.”

The gala was still roaring with life when you stepped out for some fresh air, you sat on concrete stairs, not caring if you got your 20,000-dollar dress dirty. You couldn't care about a lot of things lately.

You and Sunghoon had long parted ways, the conversation only lasted about five minutes before you were seated at your respective tables, you didn't see him again after that.

You’ve gotten everything you ever dreamed of at this point in your career, and you accomplished all your goals, in the beginning, it all seemed so impossible, but now that you're here and you've done it, you’re not so sure what's left anymore.

The sound of the door opening catches your attention, a tall, pale figure steps out, dressed in a purely black suit, and you recognize him instantly.

“Following me?” you prop your chin in your palm as your elbow rests on your knee, carrying the weight of your head as you tilt it playfully.

He’s not startled by the suddenness of your voice, which tells you, yes, he was looking for you.

He smiled. “Maybe.”

He sat next to you on the stairs, not caring if his 5,000-dollar suit got dirty, though it wasn't actually because he didn't care about the suit, but because he just wanted to be close to you.

You're both silent for a while, simply appreciating being in each other's presence after so long.

Or maybe it's because you don't know what to say and he has too much to say, so you settle for the piercing silence of unsaid words.

Sunghoon has been silent his whole life, but he promised himself tonight he wouldn't be.

“Was it worth it?”

Ah. There it is.

You think as the corners of your lips curl upward, you knew this question was coming, you sensed it the moment you saw him again.

If he had asked you that a year ago you would’ve said yes, no hesitation, no second thoughts, just a straight-up yes, and you would have meant it too.

Suddenly the silk fabric of your dress starts to itch your skin, your diamond embroidered heels start to hurt your feet, and your pearl jewelry feels too heavy.

In only a single minute, Park Sunghoon has stripped you of your persona, called you out for the fraud you are, and seen the real you.

And he accepted you.

You lie to save your pride, it's a habit of yours that he knows all too well.

He doesn't think you're perfect, but you would never have to be for him to love you.

“Sometimes,” you say.

You don't bother lying, he’ll know.

You had always been a good liar until Sunghoon came into your life.

He gently nods in understanding at your response, “Do you ever think about it? About us?”

With a chuckle, you reply, “Of course I do.”

It's true that sometimes leaving him is worth the life you're living now, but there are fragments of times when you imagine what your life could've been with him.

In another life, you never left Sunghoon, you got married, bought a home together, adopted a dog, and had a child.

On the surface that sounds nice, but in another life, you are a housewife with broken dreams, you bought a home together but it wasn't the one you always dreamed of because you had to compromise with Sunghoon, you adopted a dog but you were never really an animal person, and you had a child but motherhood was never for you.

In another life, you are happy to be a housewife, you and Sunghoon bought your dream home together, you adopted a dog that you both love, you had a child and you are the most loving mother.

In another life, you are not a housewife, you and Sunghoon bought a home even better than your dream home, you adopted a dog but you're more of a cat person, and you never had a child but you always wanted to be a mother.

In another life, you and Sunghoon work from home, you bought a decent home together, and although it's not your dream one, it's good enough, you adopted a cat, and you never had a child but because that's the way you liked things.

In another life, you and Sunghoon are divorced, the home you bought together is just walls and a roof with painful memories, you don't adopt any pets, and you never had a child.

In another life, Sunghoon is a househusband, you don't care about having a dream home because any place is home with him, you adopted a dog and a cat, and you had a child who has everything they could ever want.

In another life, you and Sunghoon are teenagers again falling in love for the very first time, and you have no idea what the future holds for you.

In another life, you and Sunghoon are just a little bit younger than you are now, in the kitchen of your shared apartment, and you are trying to figure out how to do laundry so all your clothes don’t turn blue again and how to properly calculate your taxes so you don’t go to prison for tax fraud.

In another life, you and Sunghoon have grown old together, and you are experts at doing laundry and taxes.

In another life, you are the bottles of salt and pepper on the table of a random diner and things are entirely less complicated.

In another life, you never meet Park Sunghoon.

The possibilities are endless, and the truth is, you never know what will happen in your life, and that's scary, but you hope in another life you learn to accept the bad just as easily as you accept the good.

“What does it look like?” he asks.

“Laundry and taxes,” you shrug.

You both laugh at that.

“What about you?” you ask.

“Taxes and laundry,” he smiles.

You both laugh again.

The party inside is completely forgotten about as you and Sunghoon spend what feels like hours just sitting and talking, until the realization that it’s time to go home dawns on you.

Sunghoon gets up first, holding his hand out for you to take, and you do, but when he helps you to your feet he doesn't let go just yet, instead, he looks into your eyes and you feel his thumb caress your knuckles.

“It was nice to see you again, y/n.”

“It was good to see you again too, Sunghoon.”

He finally lets you go and you already miss his warmth.

He almost walks away but turns to face you one last time.

With a hint of a smile on his lips, he says, “You know, in another life, I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you.”

And then Park Sunghoon walks out of your life forever, and you let him.

In another life, things didn't end that way.

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darthmaulification · 3 years

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Hey! Can I please make a request for a short Drabble where reader is Grogu’s nanny aboard the Razor Crest and Din develops a crush on her, but once he and the reader start visiting Grogu at Jedi School on weekends, Luke develops a crush as well? Doesn’t have to end up with either, but I would like to see either guy’s rivalry and slight jealousy (with Reader’s obliviousness).

A/N: ... okay so, i really got into the whole crush aspect of your request, anon, and this basically became a romantic prose piece. when i looked back to see what you had initially wanted, my product was... about thrice removed from the original prompt. 💀

i think i got some of the points??? like there’s din and luke and they’re both in love with reader and they both have a bit of rivalry with the other and basically that’s what matters??? please forgive me, anon, the ghost of sappho took my body over and forced me to write yearning love poetry!! 🙏 sis forced my hand!! 😭

though if there’s enough interest for it, i can always make a follow up for this, like from reader’s perspective, and write something a lil more in depth (once i get requests finished up that is). 😊

hope you enjoy! 💗

content: nothing but din and luke pining for reader, gn!reader (for the most part), use of she/her pronouns, fluff, but also a smidgen of angst 👁👁, perspective difference!!, kind of a commentary on mandalorian and jedi culture?? (mostly jedi culture lmao)

word count: 1,524

You’re beautiful.

He sees it now how your face lights up like candles being lit when his son succeeds at doing another one of his Jedi tricks. Joy illuminates your face like a spotlight, your soft cheers and kind praise make the whole room warmer. Din watches Grogu leap into your arms, cooing and squealing like he’s been given candy. It makes Din’s heart leap when you kiss his son on the head, and smile so warmly it’s like your lips become sunshine.

Din is infinitely grateful for his helmet in this moment, his face feels like it’s been too close to a fire. His fingers pick at a fraying stitch on his gloves, to prevent his hands from shaking in his lap. He hopes that the Jedi, who is standing casually across the room near you and Grogu, doesn’t notice. Din hopes you don’t notice what you’re doing to him.

I’m in love.

The sentence slips through the cracks of his thoughts the way a sunrise peeks over the horizon. You look over at him, holding up Grogu triumphantly in your hands like you would a prize, and he sucks in a breath because suddenly it feels like all he can see is you. You and Grogu, you and his son.

Please be my riduur.

“Did you see that? Wasn’t it amazing?” And Din forces himself to dip his head in a slight nod, because the Jedi is also looking at him with piercing blue eyes the color of the sky. His heart pounding, and when you laugh, and it sounds like summertime when everything is good and happy.

People love, he thinks as he stares at you, and suddenly his palms are sweaty and he feels the need to tap his foot, but Mandalorians love harder.

I dream about you every night, think about you when I lie awake. You’re always holding sunflowers, and the nightmares don’t touch me then.

Mandalorians love like there is nothing else in the universe more valuable, nothing more precious, not their vibroblades, their blasters, or even their beskar.

Giving up a blaster and a vibroblade in order to save you from that hut’uun came to me like breathing, I didn’t even think about it... I would’ve given up my beskar’gam too. I still would.

Mandalorians love with their souls laid bare, they love with their entire body, they love with sacred vows, exchanged beskar rings, their riduur’s name engraved on their hal’cabur, above their heart.

When you slept beside me one night, I whispered the entire marriage vow to you in Mando’a. You looked so peaceful bathed in the light of the moon, the silvery glow making you look holy. I’ll admit, it came out mostly accidentally, but it felt so normal, natural even. I wish you hadn’t been asleep.

Mandalorians love in spite of death, they love in the face of it. They love like warriors.

I had gotten shot. All I remember is you holding me in your arms, hands pressed over the wound. I was in pain, and you were crying, covered in blood and dirt, but you were so warm. I’m still unsure if I had actually said what I think I said:

“I care about you too much to leave you.”

He wants to tell you all of this, but he’s never been much of a romantic, or much of a speaker in general, so the words falter on his tongue each time he’s tried. And Din’s tried so many times. You say something to the Jedi, and it makes a sudden, surprising fury bubble in his chest, the vile rising to his throat. Din has to bite his tongue to hold back from shouting:

Don’t talk to her, di’kut jetii! You are undeserving of her words, of her time, of her presence. Unworthy! You can’t give her what I can, shabuir.

You look over at him again, and the hot anger dies completely, leaving him powerless before you. Din felt this way each time he’s tried to tell you how much you mean to him.

I love you, cyare.

It feels like your eyes are boring holes straight through his beskar, through his flight suit, singing his skin with their warmth. Din bites his cheek so hard he tastes copper.

You smile. It’s like the dawn.

You are the sun— His sun— of his universe, and his eyes burn from the light.

Din basks in the rays, and his heartbeat starts to slow to it’s normal, steady rhythm.

Tomorrow. I’ll tell you tomorrow.

You’re beautiful.

He sees it now in how your entire expression blooms into one of pure joy when his padawan successfully levitates the crates. It radiates in your aura, the waves of mirth traveling further than your respectfully quiet cheers and meaningful praise. Luke watches as the child leaps into your embrace, babbling without forming any actual words. Something inside Luke lurches when you place a kiss on Grogu’s head, and when your vibrant smile dissolves his willpower.

Luke draws the Force in on himself, welcoming the sturdiness it brings. He tries to ignore how his palm has gotten sweaty, but he clenches his hand into a fist and hastily relaxes it. Focus, let in calmness like a breeze. Luke hopes that the Mandalorian, sitting stiff and looming on a far bench, doesn’t notice his moment of vulnerability. He pulls the Force closer, and hopes you don’t notice what you’re doing to him.

I’m in love.

The thought springs up in his mind the way shoots of new grass breach top soil in spring time. You glance over at him as you lift the child, and the look is as quick and fleeting as blossoms on trees, but it floats in the Force like dandelion seeds, and Luke is painfully aware of how consuming you are.

Please don’t do this to me.

“Did you see that? Wasn’t it amazing?” And Luke catches your eye, offering you the smallest smile he can afford without it breaking. You look to the Mandalorian, and Luke follows your gaze because he can’t compel himself to do much else. The Mandalorian’s visor is dark like the night, and flashes when he nods his head. Luke feels his heart sink when he senses it from him, a yearning so deep he nearly drowns in it.

People love, Luke thinks and he feels all at once envious and angry and so achingly acquiescent, because Jedi cannot.

I swore by the Code years ago, but I look at you and doubt it all. It can’t be that I’m this willing to rethink everything.

Jedi are forbidden from having attachments, they cannot pursue romantic interests. Love leads to passion, and it all is an influence of the Dark. Luke knows this. He’s fallen to it before.

I’ve spent decades forgetting how deeply I cared for him! But I am reminded daily of my father, every time I look in the mirror, I see his eyes. How dare you pull me back into this cruel trap! I can’t do this again.

Luke contains himself. Jedi value peace of mind, they extend the sentiment to upholding it in the galaxy as well. They do not do it out of love, but out of obligation, out of honor, because of what’s right. They are not love.

When I first met you it was like I’d seen you before, in a past life. It was like retracing my steps, following the trail backwards, revisiting something I had passed. Despite it all, I had moved forward and took my padawan from you and the Mandalorian, plucked him from you like a petal off a flower. I watched you wilt.

Luke reminds himself. Jedi do not love. Focus is key. The Force is everything.

But you are too.

Luke has to swallow in order to make sure the words never reach his mouth, and it’s like eating thorns. You turn back to him and the look in your eyes is tender like butterfly wings. The pink in your cheeks reminds Luke of windflowers.

“Thank you again, Luke,” His soul shivers when his name sounds in your voice, “It’s so kind of you to teach Grogu.”

As he replies and tells you it’s a pleasure, he almost spills everything to you, but an abruptness shifts the energy of the room. There is a lurking anger that crawls at him through the Force, entwines him like ivies. The Mandalorian fumes, the wrath trembles like billowing leaves. Don’t. Undeserving. Unworthy.

Luke forces himself to agree and squashes down everything, pushing each painful emotion into the deepest parts of him. He watches you look to the Mandalorian, your aura flowers with affection, love.

I love you.

His resolve is fading, again. Luke reminds himself, again. Jedi do not love. Jedi do not love. Jedi do not love.

You smile, and it stings his soul like nettle.

Luke forces himself to ignore that your eyes say different things when they settle on the Mandalorian than they had him. The thought feels like eating bittersweet berries.

Briefly, he revels in what could have been.

It’s for the best.

A/N: i thought i would add another note at the end of this to explain exactly what the heck i was saying with the word soup i just wrote.

first, din is so hopelessly in love with reader that it hurts. like physically makes his heart ache. i feel that when din falls in love, he falls in love. it consumes him. i wrote a lot of sun/light imagery to portray the overwhelming, all-encompassing love din feels for reader. you are the sun that warms him, and burns him.

second, i purposely made luke have an even more tragic, even more conflicted crush on reader, on purpose, hahaha i am evil. 😈 he loves you, but forces himself not to. he tells himself that the jedi code means more. luke chooses to suffer because he knows that’s how it must be. there’s some plant/nature symbolism thrown throughout because that’s just the theme that i thought vibed with luke the most.

and that mention of anakin? i subscribe to the headcanon that luke really did love his dad, and just wanted him in his life, but of course, vader ultimately died. luke took a heavy blow from that, learned it hurts to love.

also, regarding the mini-rivalry that takes place, it’s through the force (if that wasn’t obvious) and it’s essentially another example of luke surrendering his own wants/desires and simultaneously din firmly declaring his love for you. it’s kinda meant to be the “understanding” between the two that clearly establishes who “wins” the reader.

... this was all one giant metaphor, huh?

#star wars #din djarin #luke skywalker #din djarin x reader #luke skywalker x reader #star wars din djarin #star wars luke skywalker #din djarin x you #luke skywalker x you #anon ask #anon #request

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kjmsupremacist · 2 years

Text

cards ‘n’ kisses (yuta/taeyong)

REQUEST (closed, sorry!) from anon: “Could you write something about him ACTUALLY liking someone and flirting with them but because he does it all the time the other person thinks he's just joking around and Yuta being like: The hell? Like how we didn't believe him that he actually spoiled the comeback because he lies all the time. Any pairing, rating and additional plot/ changes would be fine but I think it'd work well with Taeyong?”

Characters: Taeyong, Yuta

Genre: oneshot, getting together, college au, idiot antics, humor, incredibly lighthearted, Valentine’s Day shenanigans

Warnings: mild miscommunication but it’s solved in the matter of sentences haha; one brief and vague allusion to sex

Rating: Teen & Up

Length: 2k

Taeyong was the one to start the tradition, so it’s kind of funny that it would be his undoing.

It’s just that Taeyong believes any good friendship is inherently a little romantic, and he means that in an unironically no-homo way, despite the fact that he’s very gay. And he really does mean it. He loves his friends a lot, cherishes them with his whole heart. So their freshman year, Taeyong had suggested to his friends that they all make shitty little Valentine’s Day cards for each other, like some of them did in elementary school, when they’d just give each classmate a simple card and a piece of candy.

Everyone thought it would be funny, and kinda cute, so Taeyong got pink and red construction paper, Crayola markers, and an unholy amount of stickers, and it became an annual event. They slip the cards under each other’s doors, hand them off between classes, pass them around over lunch. They each have a signature candy so there’s variation (Taeyong called dibs on candy hearts from day one and has stuck to them firmly), and it’s a silly way to remind each other how much they care about their friendships.

The last couple of years have been a little bittersweet, though, because Taeyong’s been harboring a big fat crush on one of his friends. The problem is, Taeyong is shy, so while he does occasionally try to drop hints, he’s never very successful. And it just kinda hurts a little, to be giving Yuta a platonic Valentine’s Day card when he wants to be giving him a real one.

But it’s fine, you know? He doubts Yuta would reciprocate it (though who knows, he’s kind of hard to read), and even if he would, Taeyong’s not sure he would want to rock the boat that is their friend group. Sure, Taeil and Donghyuck are dating, but that happened as Hyuck was becoming a part of the group, so it wasn’t a huge adjustment. Or maybe Taeyong is just making up excuses so he can continue being a coward. But regardless, he’s decided it’s none of his business.

So when he makes Yuta’s card this year, he makes it just like he makes the others. He adds the same number of stickers, the same amount of candy (one box of candy hearts, taped to the back), and a personal but definitely friendly message: Happy Valentine’s Day, Yuta! Thank you for sticking with me these past three years! and no heart stickers, just in case.

He delivers them under the doors of those who live on his floor early the next morning before he goes down to breakfast. Yuta is among them; he won’t see him until the end of the day, so he’ll probably find Yuta’s card slid under his door in the same way when he comes back for lunch.

Mark is in his bio class (yes, Taeyong is, as a junior, just starting his distribution requirements), so they swap cards while they wait for professors to arrive. Mark’s card is messy but cute: he’s drawn little hearts around the edges and written in the center, Happy Valentine’s Day dude! I love you! Taeyong grins and smothers him in a hug even though Mark protests.

“You’re cute, Markie,” he says as he releases him, earning himself a glare from a very red Mark.

His next class is an advanced media studies course. Jaehyun, even though he’s a sophomore, is in it, along with Johnny. They exchange cards; Jaehyun’s has a bunch of little doodles in it, and he’s written in all caps, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME, and then underneath that in much smaller lettering, OH YEAH AND HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY OR WHATEVER. Johnny’s says, Happy Valentine’s Jaehyun Day. Taeyong laughs out loud as Jaehyun just grins at his card from Johnny, pleased.

“Yes, yes, we’re all stealing your thunder,” Taeyong says, closing the cards and carefully filing them away. “Which is exactly why we’ve been planning your birthday dinner for months.”

“I just wanted to make sure everyone remembered,” Jaehyun replies, deadpan.

With these two out of the way, it only leaves Donghyuck. They have class together in the afternoon (yoga, for the P.E. requirement, another thing Taeyong’s been procrastinating on), so during lunch Taeyong heads up to his room to collect the cards from his floormates.

From Doyoung: happy valentines u weirdo. i’m glad you make us do this

From Jungwoo: Happy Valentine’s Day, Taeyong! Hope it’s as sweet as you!

From Taeil: Happy Valentine’s, Yong-ah. I included a tab of melatonin, so please sleep well!

From Yuta: Taeyong, will you be my Valentine? And underneath, boxes marked “yes” and “also yes”.

Wait, what?

Taeyong rereads it, and then rolls his eyes. Yuta is the kind of person who likes to cause as much chaos as possible. On an alignment chart, he would be a chaotic neutral—his only goal is mayhem, and he delights in it. Most of their friends learned quickly to never trust a word that comes out of his mouth after he made Johnny cry their first year by convincing him they had a test that day that Johnny hadn’t heard about, let alone studied for. He apologized, of course, and Johnny had thought it was funny in retrospect, but it had made all of them wary of his antics. Well, Taeyong reflects as he turns the card over and carefully pulls the matcha Kit-Kat off the back, all of them but Mark, who falls for it every time with a smile on his face.

Besides, Yuta’s pulled this kind of shit before. He’s always flirting with his friends, with random strangers, even with some of his professors, for fun. He means absolutely no harm by it, and he only does it when it’s obvious he’s joking, so it’s not like he’s stringing anyone along. Unfortunately, Taeyong fell for it anyway, even though he knew it wasn’t real. And now here he is.

This is all to say, Yuta definitely wrote this as a joke. He’s the type to say, “do you want a kiss?” and then pull out a bag of Hershey’s Kisses instead. And that’s fine; honestly, Taeyong shouldn’t have expected anything else. But there’s a part of him that’s genuinely a little hurt. Taeyong wonders if maybe he does know, and he’s making fun of him, but as mischievous as Yuta is, that really doesn’t sound like something he would do. Most likely, Yuta doesn’t know how Taeyong feels about him, and it’s just an unfortunate coincidence. Still, Taeyong’s upset.

He goes through the day as he normally would, trying not to think about it, but it really does suck. Years of wishing for something like this, only to get the bastardization of it as a joke. It doesn’t feel great. But, he concedes, it’s not really Yuta’s fault. It’s Taeyong’s for liking him in the first place.

That evening, as Taeyong’s getting ready for Jaehyun’s birthday dinner, someone knocks on his door.

“Come in,” Taeyong says absently, too focused on his makeup to consider who it might be.

“Hey.” Taeyong looks up at the sound of Yuta’s voice, meeting his eyes in the mirror. He’s smiling. Taeyong tries to return it with a smile of his own.

“Hey,” he says, refocusing on his reflection. “What’s up?”

“Uh, not much?” Yuta sits down in Taeyong’s beanbag chair in the corner. “Did… did you like my card?”

If Taeyong didn’t know better, he’d say Yuta sounds nervous. Only Yuta doesn’t get nervous, so it must be an extension of his little prank.

Taeyong rolls his eyes. “Yeah, it was really funny, Yuta,” he says. “You’ve outdone yourself.”

“What do you mean, funny?” Yuta asks. He sounds confused.

“What, do you want a more in-depth review?” Taeyong asks, setting down his eyeshadow brush and searching for his eyeliner. “Ask Doyoung, then, he’s full of opinions. He’ll tell you what he thought of it in great detail, I’m sure.”

Maybe he’s being a little terse, but he can’t really blame himself. Sure, Yuta won’t understand, and it’s not his fault, either, but still, it hurts.

“Uh, but I… didn’t give that card to Doyoung,” Yuta says slowly. “Or any of our other friends. Just… just you.”

“You know the running bit you do where you lie about literally anything for fun?” Taeyong says, still laser-focused on lining his waterline. “It stops being funny when you refuse to stop doubling-down. It just gets weird.”

“I’m not lying!” Now Yuta sounds offended. “What are you talking about?”

Taeyong sets down his eyeliner, satisfied, and turns to face him. “Oh, so everyone got a silly, unique card?”

“Oh my god, no, everyone else got pretty much the same generic card,” Yuta says. He laughs incredulously, gesticulating for a moment while he tries to find the words he wants. “I—that’s not—I can’t believe this. I gave you a special one because I fucking like you!”

Taeyong rolls his eyes again. “Yeah, I’m not falling for that, Yuta. I’ve known you for too long.”

“No, I’m being serious!” Yuta protests.

“No, you’re not!” Taeyong snaps.

“Oh my god,” Yuta mumbles. “Look, what do I have to do to prove to you that I mean it?”

“I don’t know,” Taeyong says, and then the next thing is out of his mouth before he can think twice. Maybe it’s just because he knows it’ll get Yuta to snap out of it; maybe, selfishly, he just wants Yuta to feel bad like he does. “Cuz the thing is, Yuta, if you’re joking, it’s not funny at all, because I actually really like you. So cut it out.”

The room goes silent for a split second.

“Taeyong,” Yuta says quietly. “I would never joke about something like this. Not like this. That would be mean. Have I ever been mean to you?”

“No,” Taeyong admits. An idea flashes through his mind and out his mouth before he can stop it. “Okay, so if you wanna prove it to me, then kiss me. Kiss me if you’re serious, right now.”

Another second of stillness, and then Yuta is on his feet, reaching out for Taeyong. He feels hands cupping his jaw, tilting his face upward, and then Yuta’s warm lips on his. Taeyong kisses him back as best he can through his surprise, heart hammering as his brain catches up with his body and he realizes what the fuck is happening.

“So,” Yuta says when they break apart, “will you be my Valentine?”

Taeyong can’t help it. He bursts out laughing. Maybe it’s nerves, maybe it’s partially a panic response, but everything suddenly feels so ridiculous.

“Stop laughing!” Yuta says, though he’s grinning. “I’m serious! I mean, you kind of have to say yes because I already bought us tickets to the aquarium for this weekend and they’re non-refundable.”

“Oh, that’s bold of you. What if I said no?” Taeyong asks. “Did you know?”

Yuta shrugs. “Not really, no. I just figured it was time to shoot my shot, you know? If you said no, I would’ve just dragged Mark along instead.”

Taeyong squints at him. “Hm,” he says jokingly, tapping his chin. “Sounds kinda suspicious. I think… you might have to kiss me again so I can be sure.”

Yuta’s smile grows, and he leans in again to capture Taeyong’s lips with his own. It’s gentler this time, less chaotic, and Taeyong feels his stomach swoop in excitement.

“How’s that?” Yuta asks softly.

“I don’t know,” Taeyong says coyly.

Yuta laughs, leaning in close. “I can do more than just kiss you if you’re still not convinced,” he points out, and Taeyong blushes very hard. “You have until the weekend to make up your mind, after all.” But then he pulls back. “But not now. Sorry for messing up your makeup,” he adds, not sounding sorry in the slightest. “We should get going soon, or Jaehyun’ll be sad.”

“Right,” Taeyong says, shaking himself and turning back to his mirror. He catches Yuta’s gaze in the reflection and sees that he’s smirking. “But, um,” he adds, “I’m not doing anything tomorrow. So, you know. You can continue to persuade me then.”

Yuta tries and fails to suppress his smile; it’s blinding and a little predatory, all teeth. “It’s a date,” he says.

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somewhatgreatexpectations · 3 years

Text

Palace (Wanda Maximoff/ Reader)

Hello! This part is inspired by Sam Smith’s “Palace”. Let me know what you think as we move more into Wanda’s territory. I don’t want to give away much but this part would take place very close to the start of Civil War.

Summary: Certain members of the team deal with the news that you have decided to leave. A little more into Wanda’s mind.

“I'm gonna miss you. I'm still there. Sometimes I wish we never built this palace, but real love is never a waste of time”

The sound of the quinjet landing in the early morning air was a stark contrast to the serene stillness that surrounded the compound before everyone awoke. With the morning sun still below the horizon it was easy to get lost in the peaceful image. To get lost in this brief moment of tranquility before life caught up to you.

“Y/n?”

There. The trace was broken because the serenity wasn’t real. It was just an illusion. It couldn’t erase the damage that lurked shallowly under the surface. “Yes, Capsicle?”

Despite himself Steve couldn’t help the chuckle that slipped, “Even now and you won’t call me by my name?” you shrugged with a smirk. His expression became solemn once again. “You’re sure about this then?” he nodded towards the jet.

Steeling your features, you nodded firmly. “I think it’ll be good for me. They need my help and you all have everything under control over here… for now.” You added cheekily.

A sigh replaced what would have normally been a laugh. “You’re sure you don’t want to say goodbye to… anyone?” He trailed off, but you knew exactly who he was referring to. Wanda.

“It’s for the best. There’s no point dragging this out any longer. I’m just a part of her past now. Plus, I want this. My purpose in life has always been to help those who need it. I’m just fulfilling that purpose, Steve.” You answered with what you hoped was a believable smile.

What you didn’t tell him was that you used to believe that your purpose on this earth was her. It didn’t matter either way because she couldn’t be anymore.

Wordlessly Steve pulled you into his arms. You willed yourself to stop the watering of your eyes as you hugged him back. “It’s not going to be the same without you here, kid.”

Over his shoulder you noticed the sun begin to rise on the horizon. Time was running out. Soon everyone would be up whether it be for training, meetings, or just breakfast. Then you’d lose your nerve.

With a small sniffle you pulled back and smiled weakly up at Steve. “Try not to replace me while I’m gone.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Remember if you ever need my help, I’ll be back. And-” you took a sharp breath before continuing. “And please, don’t tell her where I am.”

Steve frowned at your final comment but nodded nonetheless. “You have my word. Take care of yourself out there. Call when you can.”

With one final nod you turned and boarded the quinjet without a glance back. Steve stayed until he saw the jet disappear in the distance, dreading the moment when everyone found out.

Dreading the moment when Wanda found out.

It wasn’t until mid-afternoon that the questions began. Steve breathed a sigh of relief that they weren’t directed at him.

“Has anyone seen y/n?” Natasha asked, “I have this new disarming move I want to try and she’s always saying she’s too fast for me.”

Wanda perked her head up out of reflex at the sound of your name, but quickly diverted her attention back to the book in her hands. It wasn’t like you would want to see her anyway. That didn’t stop her from eaves dropping on the conversation that was happening around her though.

“Probably in her room, avoiding our afternoon run I’m sure.” Sam chimed in.

Natasha shook her head, “Already checked there. Anyone else seen her?” She asked the remaining Avengers in the room all of them shaking their heads except Steve who walked away to the kitchen. Wanda was the only one other than Natasha to notice.

“What aren’t you telling us, Rogers?” Natasha questioned as soon as she entered the kitchen. Her head tilted in challenge.

He huffed out a tired sigh as he leaned against the counter. “Nothing.” He replied shortly which caused Natasha to quirk an eyebrow.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y. please call y/n for me and tell her to meet me in the kitchen.” She stated firmly while maintaining eye contact with Steve.

The robotic female voiced sounded moments later. “I’m sorry, Ms. Romanoff, that is not possible as Ms. Y/ln is not currently at the compound.”

Steve rubbed his temple wearily, he had hoped this conversation wouldn’t have to happen so soon. “Where is she?” Natasha countered quickly.

Once again, the robotic voice responded, “That is classified.” Neither Steve nor Natasha noticed the figure that was stopped in her tracks at F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s words.

For a moment Steve and Natasha remained in a silent stand-off, neither backing down. “Where is she?” she repeated, this time directed towards Steve.

“I can’t tell you that.” he replied quickly.

“What can you tell me?”

For a moment he seemed to think about it, about what he could say without breaking his word. “She’s on a mission.”

That isn’t entirely out of the ordinary, Wanda thought to herself as she began holding her breath nervously. She had a bad feeling about this.

“Where?” Natasha fired off.

A mere shake of his head was all he gave her, “I can’t tell you that.” He repeated.

“How long?” Natasha stared at him for a moment, analyzing his solemn nature. Realization quickly dawned on her. You weren’t coming back.

There was hesitation in his words as he drew them out slowly. Almost as if he was coming to terms with the words himself. “Possibly a year, maybe two…” he drew in a breath before continuing. Wanda dug her nails into her palm. “It’s most likely indefinite. She may never come back.” He finally concluded somberly.

Wanda couldn’t contain the gasp that slipped passed her lips. Natasha quickly turned her head in the direction of the sound, her own sadness taking a back seat when she noticed the look on the younger girl’s face.

“Why wouldn’t she tell m- tell us anything?” Wanda demanded desperately, her accent heavily pronounced and her eyes wide with distress. Steve didn’t reply, he couldn’t find it in himself to. He merely looked at her with pity.

She knew why you didn’t tell her anything. She understood, and her legs felt like they’d give out under the weight of that knowledge any second now.

Taking pity on the girl Natasha hesitantly made her way over to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Maybe you should go sit down.”

Erratically Wanda pulled herself out of arm’s reach and marched over to Steve, her eyes watering despite her aggressive tone. “Tell me where she is. Right now.”

Steve didn’t waver, his conversation with you playing over in his mind. “I can’t.”

Red wisps began floating around Wanda’s hands as her eyes began to glow. “That’s fine. You’ll tell me whether you want to or not.”

Natasha tried to step in, but Steve merely raised his hand. “I can’t because she didn’t tell me. She thought this might happen. She only told me that she’s leaving and how long she’d be gone. She didn’t tell me where she would be located.” He lied smoothly, surprising even himself. He refused to break his word to you.

Wanda’s eyes slowly returned to their normal shade of green as her shoulders slumped, the fight draining from her body. Steve gently placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “She wanted me to tell you that she was sorry. To all of you.” He added as he looked up at Natasha who nodded sadly in understanding.

At his words, Wanda merely shut her eyes, she knew that they should have brought her comfort, but they didn’t in the slightest. His words wouldn’t change the fact that you were gone and would quite possibly never be back. She knew she had no right to be upset. She made her decision, now she would have to live with it. That knowledge didn’t stop it from hurting though.

“Did she say anything else?” she asked quietly, clinging to any information she could get. Trying desperately to gain control of her emotions.

“That she was fulfilling her purpose by going. Helping others.” Steve offered.

Natasha smiled faintly at his words. “Sounds like destiny then. That’s definitely something she’s good at.”

Wanda couldn’t have agreed with Natasha more. You were destined to help others. You helped her, saved her, and now you’d be a life raft for others. The secret of your love would no longer be an exclusive privilege that only a select few knew of. The true and whole-hearted way in which you loved her would be given to another.

One day, she would merely be a ghost of your past. She would become a painful story that you’d share in the arms of another. Her heart fluttered anxiously at the thought.

It was as though news of your departure made her aware of what her stubborn mind and your usual steady present prevented her from seeing. “Wanda?” she faintly heard a voice call out to her.

Her features remained neutral. The dull ache tightened in her chest. She knew there was nothing she could do to stop it. “Yes?” she replied flatly.

Natasha placed a comforting hand on her arm, a look of concern on her face as Steve watched curiously from where he stood. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Wanda replied, waving her hand. “I’ll be in my room if you need me.”

Both Steve and Natasha exchanged uncertain looks as they watched Wanda exit the kitchen area. With her mind so muddled Wanda just began walking, a laugh escaping her lips when she finally realized where she had gone on reflex. The roof. The same place you both had actively avoided since that fateful nights a few months ago. It was bittersweet.

She took a seat in the same area you had both sat in countless times before as she pulled her knees to her chest and looked around. It was almost as if she could still hear the soft music playing in the background and the sound of your occasional humming from right beside her, never expecting anything more from her. An unmovable force. A quiet pillar of support that she so often relied on. That was all just a memory now.

She always dreaded the idea that one day she would lose you, she never would have guessed that she would have lost you at her own hands.

In the solitude she finally allowed a few silent tears to fall down her cheek, allowed herself to feel what she had been refusing for so long. She was going to miss you, she knew that much. She was going to miss the beautiful relationship that you had created together, the same relationship that was mere ruins now. She just hoped you would forgive her one day, she hoped that you would return one day soon. She didn’t dare allow herself to hope for more.

“Wanda?” came the sound of another voice. The contrast of night surprising Wanda when she focused on the world around her once again, she must have been up here for hours. A moment later Vision came into her view. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you. Is something wrong?”

She bit her lip, not ready to talk about the chaos in her mind yet. “I don’t want to talk about it.” Wanda eventually mumbled.

A look of confusion covered Vision’s features, “Is this about Y/n?” he pressed.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” She repeated with growing frustration.

Again, Vision stared at her with confusion. “My findings have suggested that the only way to properly process sadness is to talk about it.” He replied matter-of-factly.

As much as she didn’t want to, she couldn’t help but compare how you comforted her to how Vision was attempting to. “Well, your findings don’t apply to everyone.” She said, her tone laced with irritation.

“My findings are rarely ever wrong.”

Wanda groaned. “Can you just hold me?”

Cool arms wrapped around her and pulled her close. For a moment he just held her in silence. The silence did not last though. “I still believe it would be beneficial for you to talk to me about how you are feeling.” He insisted once more.

Wanda ignored him, not having the energy to argue back.

Even though she was in Vision’s arms, all she could think of was you. About how desperately she wished to be in the arms that said they’d never let her go. The arms that she forced to let go. She couldn’t help but feel like she was sinking ever so slightly with no life raft in sight.

There you have it, part 7! Technically this is the first part of this series I wrote with a lot of touch up. As always, I hope you all enjoyed. Thoughts and comments always welcome. :)

#wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda marvel #wanda maximov #wanda maximoff fic #wanda maximoff fanfiction #wanda maximoff imagine #wandavision x reader #wandavision #marvel x reader #marvel #marvel x y/n #avengers x y/n #avengers x you #wanda

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nootgi · 3 years

Text

Love? - Kaeya

A/N:// I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS FIC WHILST I WORK ON MY OTHER REQS, I MAY HAVE CRIED A LIL WRITING THIS! I apologise for this story too T^T

Word count: 3k

“What’s love?” Kaeya paused at the question, his paperwork left forgotten on the table.

“Isn’t that a big question~!” He teases Annette, ruffling her hair. She puffs out her reddened cheeks and tries to move away from his hand, pressing Kaeya for an answer.

“Have you ever heard the phrase curiosity killed the cat? Though I suppose a baby like you wouldn’t know at such a young age.” He laughs, picking up the glass of grape juice to sip from. No alcohol around the children is what you strictly ordered when Kaeya decided to take Annette to work. For something like take your daughter to work day.

“I’m 6! I’m not a baby and mother says it’s good to be curious.” He couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face at her words. That sounds very like you. The apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree he muses as he looks into Annie’s eyes, they hold the same wild innocence yours do. She has her mother’s eyes.

“Very well then, let me tell you a story.”

It was early April and the Windblume festival was coming to a close. The celebrations, despite coming to an ending, still kept the streets lively. Most of the people of Mondstadt were recovering from a hangover from last night’s heavy drinking but still had smiles on their faces. Kaeya was going for a stroll, to distract himself from the thoughts building in the back of his mind. He looked down at the plaza from where he stood, watching the clean up. It always felt bittersweet, taking down the flower garlands that hung from the buildings or rolling up the green carpets that lined the steps. He didn’t know how but he came to love Mondstadt so much... Well actually he did know. They accepted him for who he is, with all of his flaws and lies, Mondstadt and its people held a part of him he didn’t know he had. His family. And in that moment as windwheel aester petals blew from above, Mondstadt gave him something he’ll always be thankful for.

“Here’s a flower for our cavalry captain!” You cheered, holding a cecilia flower in front of Kaeya’s face, snapping him out of his thoughts. You snuck up on him, attacking him at his weakest moment with a smile. Even though Windblume was coming to a close, you kept the festive cheer. You were handing out a variety of flowers to everyone in Mondstadt to spread the joy and love to everyone.

“Such beauty handing me a flower, what did I do to deserve this.” He smirks at your momentary panic, ducking down slightly to be face to face. He takes the flower and smells it, hiding his smile in it’s petals. You scold him for saying such cheesy things to someone he just met. It was funny how even though it was your first meeting, your personalities fit perfectly as one.

“Don’t you ever feel embarrassed by saying those things?” You adjust the flower that was tucked behind your ear.

“The only embarrassment I feel is that I have nothing in return for this lovely gift.” His hand comes up to fix the flower, tucking it perfectly behind your ear. The white petals glowing against your skin. That one encounter set the tradition of Kaeya and you giving presents back and forth every year during Windblume. Even as the years went on, the present stayed as a simple cecilia flower as an ode to that first meeting.

“He didn’t believe in love at first sight. You could say it was only something that existed in fairy tales for plot convenience. It takes a lot more than first sight to fall in love but he swore that moment could’ve been it.” He looks back at the child who now climbed into his lap, she placed the red blanket over the two of them to make sure they were both comfortable. Her eyes were fixed on Kaeya, watching with eager eyes to hear more. He holds her close so she doesn’t fall off his lap as he continues his story.

“Love can be the best feeling in the whole world but it can also be the worst.”

Kaeya stood in front of the crowd of kids with an odd look on his face. It wasn’t one you were used to seeing on his face, it was the look of utter confusion. You walked over to find out what was going on but decided to listen to the conversation first.

“Sister Barbara said you’d be entertaining us! But this is boring!!” One of the kids said, the others around him nodding and some going far as to cheer. Kaeya didn’t know what to do. He was bad with kids, he couldn’t be mean otherwise Jean would have to deal with the complaints and he most definitely couldn’t use his usual lines. As he tried to think of something to do the kids started to chant ‘let’s play!’ and that’s when you finally decided to enter.

“Hey there Captain! Need some help?” It was like an angel coming down from the heavens, he swore there was even a halo around your head. The kids, already knowing you, cheered at your entrance. Kaeya watched as you calmed the kids down, getting them to eat lunch and successfully buying time for the two of you to plan something to entertain them.

“How’d you manage to get into this then Kaeya?” You approach him after giving the last child some apple juice.

“Jean would normally do this but since it’s been a while since she spent time with her sister I decided to volunteer.” That stunned you for a moment, you heard stories from Amber about how Kaeya always seemed to avoid work and formed an unfair opinion of him in your head. You felt guilty because of those thoughts, you saw how he struggled with those kids but still put himself out there for the sake of Jean and Barbara. “But let’s not tell Jean that.”

“Would it be so bad for Jean to know the truth?” You ask plainly, ignoring the way Kaeya said the last part of his sentence.

“Well-” You didn’t even let him finish

“I think the problem you have Kaeya is that you’re too closed off, children are so open and trusting that the only way to get along with them is to do the same.”

“That can’t be done overnight let alone in an hour (Y/N).” It was the first time Kaeya said your name and it sent shivers down your spine. The very thought of opening up felt dangerous to Kaeya, the last time he opened up the last of his family left him in the dust.

“You’re right in that area but we can take baby steps!” You weren’t deterred by the tall walls he built around himself. You used the word ‘we’. We can take baby steps. That’s all that lingered in Kaeya’s mind, it was like an informal promise from you to him that you’ll be beside him for that journey.

“Then where do we start, captain cheerful?” You roll your eyes at the nickname but gesture towards the children.

“We start with them.” That day was one of the best days Kaeya had since his childhood. He never thought hide and seek could be so thrilling or that duck duck goose could be so intense! The kids were more than happy to embrace Kaeya and his awkward aura, teaching him of super secret tactics that no-one would ever know. He found himself learning more about the children and about himself. At times when he feels his guard going back up, he glances over at you and sees you playing with some of the quieter children, bringing them out of their shells. Your smile blended in with the childish joy of the kids around the two of you. Sometimes your eyes caught each other's and you both just shyly laughed it off as kids pulled the two of you away in different directions. It was hard to catch a moment to talk to each other until you took the kids to watch the sunset by Cider lake. Most of the kids were settled on the grass, sitting crossed leg and talking about all the fun they had that day. One of the boys shyly tugged Kaeya’s leg, asking to be carried since his mother always did it for him. He looked towards you for help but you just gave two thumbs up, encouraging him. He carefully picked up the boy, letting him rest on his hip and one arm securing his waist. The boy rested his head on Kaeya's shoulder, using the fur on his shoulder as a pillow to slowly doze off. Kaeya stood still. He didn’t expect the day to go like this let alone carry a sleeping child too. You patted Kaeya’s shoulder to reassure him and the rest of the sunset was spent with whispered words exchanged between the two of you. After such a successful day, the two of you decided to take the kids once every week off of Jean’s hands.

“Love didn’t make him become a better person magically but instead motivated him to strive for that. She inspired him to try and be a better version of himself. It wasn’t like she was perfect either, they both worked on themselves whilst inspiring each other. That’s the good side of love Annie, but there is a bad side too…” Annette saw Kaeya’s eyes darken a little and she moved her small hands to rest on top of his larger ones to comfort him.

All Kaeya saw was red. It started off as a light hearted exchange between some treasure hunters that the two of you came across during an adventure. They used the typical story of their cart breaking down and needing help so they could lure adventurers into a trap before robbing them blind. Kaeya already knowing this tried to shut them down before anyone else could fall victim to them. He was going to only use his words since he didn’t want you getting hurt in the crossfire. He knew you could defend yourself but it was too risky with the amount of numbers they had on them, no doubt there were more of them hidden. However his words only seemed to provoke the treasure hunters more, they struck to attack him but the crossbow went astray and hit you in the shoulder instead. It could’ve been a simple flesh wound or a small cut but even the tiniest amount of blood from you sent him off. The area started dropping in temperature, the floor stable floor below the men started to turn into ice and there was a still moment as a singular snowflake drifted down onto the floor. Once it hit the ground, there was a flash and its delicate crystals were stained with blood. Kaeya stood over the last one with his sword raised to crash down on him till you came from nowhere to hold back his arm.

“Kaeya! Stop this!!” You begged him, looking at his side profile and trying to avoid looking at the bodies that surrounded the two of you. He couldn’t hear you, all he could hear was your scream when you got hit and had tunnel vision.

“Please stop, you’re scaring me.” You sobbed softly, finally catching his eye. The darkness that clouded his eyes faltered as he put down his sword and embraced you. The man that was on the floor scrambled up to his feet, apologising profusely before running off with a terrified shriek. Kaeya could care less about what he did, he could only think about you now. He felt your shoulders shake from the fear or maybe from the sobs that escaped your body. His heart felt as though it dropped to his stomach, he hurt you. He scared you. When his hand came up to pat your head, you flinched away. It still sticks with him to this day, your tear stained face and eyes filled with fear because of what he was. He hated himself after that day, he felt as though he was back to square one.

“It can lead you to dangerous things. You could disregard everything and everyone around you and ironically hurt the one you were trying to protect. But you can control all these negatives by simply talking about it with whoever you love. Never run away from it.”

“Did the lady leave him after that?” Annette asked with tears in her eyes, not wanting to see such a tragic ending for the love story.

“No she didn’t. When he ran away, she chased after him. She was really stubborn and cornered the poor man!”

After the incident, Kaeya was put on a suspension from his job. The people of Mondstadt didn’t know any better, thinking it was him taking a small break from his work. Kaeya doesn’t know why Jean kept it a secret but decided to roll with it. He took his suspension as a time to withdraw from you, it was scary how quickly he became so attached to you. It was dangerous for the two of you so he decided himself to end whatever went on between the two of you. When you woke up the next day, you found out about Kaeya’s suspension and tried looking for him to talk things out. It was an impossible task since Kaeya seemed to become air whenever he saw you approaching or when you ask people about his location they all gave different answers. It annoys you to no end. He saves your life and then decides to remove himself from your life. Like hell you’d allow that. So you hatch a plan with Rosaria.

It was a Thursday night and normally Kaeya would be holed up at work but with his suspension he decided to go to the angel’s share. Rosaria said she would be there in the back corner on the second floor, she told him that she would drink with him since it was boring to drink alone. He arrives earlier than Rosaria and decides to start drinking before she gets there, ordering a bottle of dandelion wine and slowly sipping on it. Minutes turn into hours and before he realises it’s closing time and he isn’t nearly as drunk as he would like to be. Rosaria was a no show and the tavern was completely empty. That’s when Kaeya realised he was caught in a trap, he had nowhere to run as you slowly approached him. You had a really angry look on your face. It was one look, he hates to admit, that scared him. You say nothing as you seat yourself across from Kaeya.

“F-fancy seeing you here (Y/N).” He offers with a meek smile.

“It really is an odd coincidence huh? It feels like it’s been a while since we talked.” You smile, but it isn’t reaching your eyes. That night you both talked about your feelings and cried with each other. Kaeya tells you things he never imagined telling you, about his self-hatred and how he feels as though he doesn’t belong. How the guilt eats him up everyday. You in return comfort him through it all, you might not have much to say back to him but that’s okay because just having someone listen to him was more than enough. Especially if it was you.

He was walking away from your doorstep after dropping you off home when he was stopped by you.

“No matter what happens Kaeya, don’t make my decisions for me! I’m a grownup and I told you all those years ago, WE will take these baby steps together.” You say seriously, holding his gaze with your fiery eyes. As he looked up at you, he felt his heartbeat pick up and a terrible realisation came down on him. Oh.

“I promise.” He was in love.

“When you love someone Annette, it isn’t all black and white. You have to work to keep your relationship going, when something bad happens you talk about it, celebrate the small wins alongside the big ones. At moments you can feel lost in love, know you aren’t alone in this world. And once you find that special person, never let them go.” He pats the girl’s head as she brings her hand up to rub at her sleepy eyes.

“Would there ever be a moment you would let go of love?” She asked innocently. As Kaeya opened his mouth to respond, the sound of the door opening interrupted the two of them.

The two look towards who came in and suddenly all the sleepiness in Annette’s body seems to leave her.

“Mommy!” She shouted excitedly, jumping into your open arms. You lift her up and spin her around as she giggles happily. Kaeya watched the exchange with fond eyes, standing up to walk towards them.

“So what did you do today?” You ask, it seems like an innocent question but Kaeya knows it's you checking to see if the two of you got up to any devious acts.

“I learnt about love!” Annette says proudly, she holds her hands against her hips and proudly puffs her chest out. Kaeya laughs softly, as you turn to him with a curious gaze.

“Oh really? Who taught you?” Diluc walks in behind you, laughing softly at Annette. Annette notices his arrival, reaching out for him to take her off of you. She laughs when Diluc tickles her sides as he adjusts his grip on her.

“Uncle Kaeya!” Her red hair bounces as she turns to point to Kaeya who was standing a few steps away from the family.

She had her mother’s eyes and her father’s hair.

‘There can be a moment Annie. Sometimes there can be a moment when you realise another person can make them happier than you ever could but I hope from the bottom of my heart that, you, my dearest niece will never experience that.’

#genshin impact x reader #genshin impact #genshin impact kaeya #kaeya x reader #diluc #Kaeya #f!reader #kaeya alberich #fluff #angst #nootieml #genshinml

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inkykeiji · 3 years

Text

day 5 ❅ let’s hit the north pole and live happily

please don’t cry no tears now, it’s christmas baby

day four ❅ day five | series masterlist

character: todoroki touya | dabi

genre: hmmm bittersweet angst

notes: AAAAAAAAH MERRY CHRISTMAS TO THOSE OF YOU THAT CELEBRATE AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO THOSE OF YOU THAT DON’T <33 eeee here it is, the final day!! it’s short n (bitter)sweet, just a lil epilogue of sorts to wrap the whole thing up. thank you so, so much to every single one of you that has supported my blog over the past few months, your love means more to me than words will ever be able to tell you <3 | title credit: snowman by sia

warnings: 18+ (no hardcore smut but still), pseudo-incest (stepcest), tense family dynamics, size difference, generally toxic relationships (possessiveness, extreme dependency)

words: 2.3k

synopsis:

Because he’s right. Because this trip would have, undoubtedly, killed him, had it not been for you and your soothing lips, kissing his tears away; you and your gentle fingers, dancing along his skin as they calmed his sobs; you and your unwavering love for him, filling him up until he felt like he was going to burst with it, your discernible warmth laving over his body, his mind, his very soul.

❅ ❅ ❅ ❅ ❅ ❅

The wind rattling the old bay window has you waking with a start, jolting a little as another harsh gust blows against the glass, sweeping up powdery snow and dancing with it in intricate, forceful squalls.

A deep sigh slips through your parted lips as your head flops back against the pillow, listlessly staring at the ceiling.

It’s Christmas.

You had decided to stay, Touya promising you he could handle another twelve hours around your family, especially if he was sleeping through most of it.

“I don’t want to further upset my mom,” he had told you, lips tugging down as bloodshot cobalt eyes glanced away from your inquisitive stare. “There’s no point in leaving now and causing more problems when we can just leave early tomorrow,”

Of course, niichan. Whatever you want, niichan.

Rolling over onto your side, you run your fingers through his tousled hair, head tilting forward to pepper tender kisses across his face.

It rouses him slowly, gently, lids lifting to reveal brilliant sapphire, gleaming in the grey morning light, and blinking a little as his gaze focuses, a small grin forming on his lips.

Really, there’s no other way he’d rather wake up, no other sight he’d rather be greeted with, except for you scattering the sweetest kisses across his face, calling his name in the sweetest whisper, staring at him with the sweetest eyes.

“Merry Christmas, princess,” his voice is gravelly, vibrating in his throat, eyelids still a little puffy and swollen from the night before.

“Merry Christmas, niichan,” you whisper, fingers trailing down the side of his face, a deep sense of bittersweet melancholy burrowing in your chest.

It’s Christmas.

He made it.

“You did it,” soft lips murmur the praise into his fluffy hair, inhaling his musky scent and filling your body with it, with him, burning hickory wood and Marlboros with just a hint of day-old cologne. “I am so proud of you,”

And normally, normally he’d playfully tell you to shut up, rolling his eyes at your gentle compliments.

But today isn’t normal.

“Couldn’t have done it without you,” he admits in a mumble, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck and exhaling. His voice is so raw, so honest, that it sends tears rushing to your eyes, stinging a little as they blur your vision.

You say nothing, because there’s nothing to say, swallowing thickly against the lump that’s lodged itself in your throat and blinking rapidly to keep the tears from escaping your eyes, little fingers tangling themselves in his hair as you hold him close.

❅ ❅ ❅

Christmas Day is tense, and awkward, as you’d expected it to be.

Neither of you are present at breakfast, opting to stay in bed, to pretend to still be sleeping as Touya ruts into you slowly, lazily rolling his hips as he swallows your mewls, mingling with his little pants and the gentle creak of old bedsprings, creating the softest, sweetest symphony. Words whispered against your skin promise you that next Christmas, and every Christmas after that, we’ll celebrate just like this, just the two of us, tangled up in each other as you writhe and gasp and tremble and cum.

Just the two of you…you like the sound of that.

No one tries to wake you. No one comes to get you to ask if you’re hungry, no one saves you a plate of leftovers, no one tells you that they’ve already begun opening gifts, that they’ll be done by the time the two of you finally emerge from your cozy little bedroom.

Your meek little merry Christmas is met with a chorus of mumbles, your family members keeping their eyes averted as you stand at the bottom of the stairs, peeking out from behind Touya’s torso.

They don’t ask what happened. They don’t ask where you went last night, or how Touya’s feeling this afternoon, despite the fact that every single one of them had witnessed his puffy, tear-stained face as you had barreled through the living room the past evening, had heard him choking on his own sobs as you frantically tried to calm him while half-dragging him to the front door.

And Touya doesn’t apologize. He doesn’t apologize for nearly pulling a gun on his baby brother the day you arrived, doesn’t apologize for lobbing a block of ice at his face, doesn’t apologize for the cracked lip and bruised eye he gifted him two days ago.

You don’t open any of their presents, which is fine, because there’s only one that truly matters to you—a tiny box sitting abandoned under the tree, wrapped in shimmering azure paper, glinting in the weak yellow light.

It holds a diamond encrusted platinum choker, roughly two fingers wide and not unlike the gold one Duchess from The Aristocats dons. You’re more of a Marie, Touya tells you as you stare down at it, tilting it in the dim light and watching as the precious gems catch, casting brilliant little rainbows. But I thought this would suit you, too.

Tears cloud your vision, glistening in the Christmas tree lights as you gaze up at your niichan, hitched little thank you’s lodging in your throat.

“Look on the inside,” he urges, jutting his chin at the box and directing your stare back down, dainty fingers picking it up in the most delicate fashion and scanning the inside of the band.

Right at the front, carved into the platinum in elegant, loopy letters, reads: To my princess, Merry Christmas. Love, your niichan.

“It’s stunning,” you murmur, looking back up at him again, little watery giggles tumbling past your lips. “Help me put it on?”

A fond laugh rumbles deep in his chest and he nods, taking the piece of jewelry from your hands and slipping it around your neck, large hands gentle and careful as they fasten it.

The weight of the choker is comforting around your skin, searing into your flesh in the most pleasant way, a physical manifestation of Touya’s love, of Touya’s ownership, that you can wear forever.

“Open mine!” you urge him excitedly, plucking the only other present left under the tree—a small rectangular box, wrapped in glittery pink paper—and shoving it at him.

And he can’t help the snort that escapes his lips as he tears through such pretty princess wrapping, eyes softening as he uncaps the box.

A Boker Lockback Hunter knife gleams up at him, the handle encased in pearly iridescent nacre, such elegant material contrasted by the glinting silver of the blade. Your name is engraved across the blade in a neat scrawl, and he inhales sharply, taking it between his fingers like it’s the most precious thing he’s ever held, turning it and watching it glimmer in the light.

Sapphire eyes finally flit to yours, an unreadable expression on his face. And, for a moment, you’re terrified he hates it.

But then he’s surging forward, dropping the box from his other hand and cupping your jaw as he drags your face towards his, smashing your lips together in front of the entire family. Someone gasps, someone mutters something, someone chokes on their breath, but you can’t be bothered to care, not when all you can see, taste, feel is Touya, mouth slotted against yours as his lips move in the gentlest caresses, pure love and adoration pouring from him and into you, filling your chest until it swells, until it feels as though it’s going to burst.

“I love it,” he murmurs as he rests his forehead against yours, breathing slightly laboured, eyes still closed. “Thank you, princess,”

And he does love it, he loves it so much, because now, he can carry a little piece of you with him everywhere he goes, something almost as pretty as you are on his body at all times. Because now, every time he uses that knife to protect, to torture, to kill, he’ll be reminded of exactly why he does it, and who he does it for.

The rest of the family stares at the two of you, gazes searing into your skin, their travelling eyes leaving a scalding, prickly heat in their wake as they observe you and Touya exchange your gifts, entirely consumed by one another, caught up in your own little world, eons away from everything else.

And you wait for it to come, wait for the hurt and sorrow and regret to seep into your chest, to sink, heavy and stifling, to the very pit of your stomach, but it never does.

Disappointment is thick in the air, adding a weight that should feel suffocating. And it does, in a way, but not the way it’s supposed to.

Because you meant what you said last night in the car—you really don’t care what any of these people think of you, don’t care if they’re upset with you, frustrated with you, exasperated with you—as long as you have Touya, it really doesn’t matter.

Their thoughts, opinions, feelings—none of them are important, not when Touya’s got his strong arms wrapped around your waist, not when you’re safe in his warm, protective embrace, nuzzling into his firm chest, comforting and familiar.

Your father can barely meet your eyes, let alone speak any words to you, but it doesn’t matter, not when Touya’s been gazing at you with such affection it’s nearly choking, not when Touya’s been whispering the sweetest little affirmations, praise and compliments and words of love, to you all day, lips tickling the shell of your ear.

Fuyumi no longer tries to keep the peace, looking as if she just swallowed something sour every time she accidentally catches your gaze. She sits next to her mother on the loveseat, her body so rigid it must be aching, muscles tight and tense, coiling any time Touya speaks, any time you answer.

But it doesn’t matter, because you feel relaxed and at ease in your niichan’s arms, answering his questions with soft murmurs and little giggles.

Natsuo can’t seem to sit still, fingers fidgeting as they pick almost viciously at his cuticles, palms running down his thighs, rubbing behind his neck, dragging over his face, body full of jitters as if he’s had too many cups of coffee…or as if he’s coming down from something.

But it doesn’t matter, because Touya is still, serene and calm for the first time since stepping foot in this cabin, finally able to breathe now that everyone’s stopped pretending, stopped trying to be a family that they’re not, a family that they’ve never been, a family that they’ll never be.

Shouto’s entirely silent, stoic and apathetic, though he isn’t afraid to look at you, to glare at Touya as nimble fingers pick idly at the thick cream bandage wrapped around his hand, covering an ugly curve of five stitches across his palm, curtesy of Natsuo.

But it doesn’t matter, because neither of you have anything to say to him, verbally or otherwise.

❅ ❅ ❅

You don’t stay for Christmas dinner. Rei is stiff when she hugs the both of you goodbye, voice void of any emotion as she wishes you a safe trip home, makes you promise to call her when you arrive at the flat, though you’re absolutely positive she won’t want to hear from either of you.

It’s just going through the motions at this point, doing what every good mother is supposed to do when her children depart on Christmas Day. No one else, save for Natsuo, bids you farewell.

Touya doesn’t apologize to his mother, either, although you know he will a few nights from now when he calls her—in his own convoluted way, a sorry without a ‘sorry’—deep voice caressing her ear sweetly like he always does, laced with just a hint of derision as he lists all of his wrongdoings, as he subtly and skillfully connects them back to her, as if they’re her mistakes. And you know she’ll forgive him, like she always does, that she’ll apologize too, for forcing him through such a horrendous disaster—apologies that had become a habit long, long ago, after something goes seriously south at a family event, as they have a tendency to do when Touya’s involved.

Snow crunches under your boots as Natsuo walks with you to the Audi, each step further away from the cabin aiding you in feeling lighter and lighter, each step further away from the cabin allowing your lungs to open up a little more, fresh air rushing in as the invisible weights of family obligations and duties begin to lift.

True to his word, Natsuo returns Touya’s weapons the moment he’s behind the wheel, wishing the two of you a merry Christmas and promising to swing by the flat soon—maybe for New Years, he muses—before patting the roof of the car and sending you on your way.

Rei watches the whole interaction from the front door, arms wrapped tightly around herself as she leans precariously against the doorframe, face crumpled with an emotion you’ve never seen before, something akin to a complicated, contradicting mixture of grief and affection.

A deep breath you hadn’t realized you were holding slips through parted lips as the Audi finally pulls onto the road. Warm and heavy, a large hand snakes it’s way onto your thigh, kneading the muscle slightly, Touya casting a glace at you through the corner of his eye with a tiny smile tugging at his lips. And you can practically see it, the tension dissipating from his tight body with each second further from the cabin, becoming more fluid and relaxed. The two of you only have each other now, but that’s okay. It’s you and him against the world now, a fact solidified by this trip, but neither of you would have it any other way.

“Never again,” Touya sighs the moment the cabin is out of sight, disappearing in the rearview mirror behind a hill.

No, you agree. Never again.

#dabi x reader #dabi #todoroki touya x reader #todoroki touya #MERRY CHRISTMAS I LOVE U ALL SOOOOO MUCH #sorry this is liiiike two hours later than it was supposed to be i got caught up with family!!#k i'm gonna go eat dinner now lmao #AND THEN #ASK TIME WOOOO i miss u guys so much!!!#is he gonna use that knife to carve his name into her skin somewhere???#u bet ur fuckin ass he is!!#dabi smut #tw pseudo-incest

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thran-duils · 3 years

Text

Doll Me Up (P.4)

Title: Doll Me Up (Part Four) Summary: Fem!Reader x Dark Mob!Tony Stark. On good days, you and Tony were a power couple. You, a perfect trophy wife with your hands in local charities to promote a wholesome image. Tony, business man but sullied with organized crime. He indulged in his illegal gambling, extortion, and political corruption. And he indulged in his escort business. Hell, that is where he had found you. You were a brat, and he loved a challenge. Words: 2,965 Warnings: Unhealthy relationships, smut, daddy kink, dom/sub, manipulation, death, violence, possessive behavior

Part Three || Part Five || Masterpost (mobile) || Fanfic masterpost

Tony’s office was expansive, but you were in such a small space of it.

You had just gotten back from your honeymoon and he stopped by the office to grab some paperwork and you had trailed along behind him. As soon as he had closed the door to his office, he had grabbed your hand, forcing it to his crotch. One thing led to another and you found yourself tucked underneath his desk, your mouth wrapped around his balls as he stroked himself, his head thrown back against his chair.

“Just like that,” Tony panted. “Keep flicking your tongue like that, princess.”

There was a sharp knock at the door and the two of you froze. His door opened and your eyes widened at the prospect of being caught in this position. Tony was chill as a cucumber though, both his hands coming up on his desk immediately.

“Rhodey,” Tony said sounding surprised to see him and for good reason. You had only stopped in, not announcing you were going to be here. You breathed evenly through your nose but the feeling of it made his cock twitch, it brushing your face. He shifted at the even slight contact, hopefully unnoticed.

“Huh, you are here,” Rhodey said from over by the door. “Maria said she saw you come in. Aren’t you supposed to be on your honeymoon?”

“Just got back. Landed the helicopter outside actually.”

“Where’s Y/N?”

You were not moving, waiting for Rhodey to leave. Tony’s balls were still settled in your mouth as you sat suspended in the lewd act.

“Uh, went to get something to drink I think. She should be back. Just… stopped in to grab some stuff.”

There was a small pause, and you could only imagine the awkwardness exchanged in their looks.

“You alright?” Rhodey asked uncertainly.

“Perfect. Why?”

Another pause.

“No reason...” Rhodey said trailing off. “Well, you should finish your vacation. You work too much. Gotta make sure that you’re doting on the missus too.”

“Is the single man trying to give me relationship advice about my marriage?” Tony could not help but to quip.

Rhodey laughed and said, “Jackass. I’ll see you next week. Stay out of the office until then after this, you hear me? You’ll thank me for forcing that and so will Y/N.”

“Loud and clear.”

When the door closed, you sucked hard. Tony grunted in response and then a strangled laugh left his throat.

“Good girl. You’re so well trained,” he praised, guiding his dick to your eager mouth.

<><><>

You sat in the back of the car with Tony, your arms crossed tightly across your chest, staring out the window. You were not even trying to hide the tears trailing down your cheeks, thinking of how hurt Liam was in and the aftermath of it. Tony had been angry with you before, Cassandra’s party for one example. And you had both been inebriated which only exacerbated the situation. But him sober though and angry? This was a new experience. You felt a twinge of fear of if he had gotten it out of his system or if he had something else planned. He threatened punishment though, hadn’t he?

He was silent the whole way home, but you could feel the fury. He would not even look at you, sitting as far away as possible.

When Happy pulled into the garage and parked the car, Tony was out of the car quickly. You gathered up your bags before getting out of the car. Tony was striding ahead of you down the garage, not waiting for you.

You caught Happy’s eyes and huffed when he tried to take the bags from you. “I can do it myself, thanks.”

Happy’s hands fell back down to his sides and he looked miffed, but you ignored it, beginning to follow Tony. He stormed inside and was making a beeline for your bedroom. You were already tensing, thinking of the spanking you were going to get. You followed him all the same into the master bedroom and went into your closet to put your bags down.

When you turned back around, you found him looming in the doorway.

He let out a humorless laugh, breaking the silence the two of you had been suspended in. You bit at your cheeks, waiting for him to explode because you had seen him like this before; that manic type laughter.

Tony threw out his arms, “I just don’t get it, baby! I mean, are you really that fucking stupid? You thought taking a plane to another state – let alone city – wasn’t going to piss me off to high heaven? And you hole up in some hotel with some guy like some skank—”

“I didn’t have sex with him!” you interrupted him, offended.

He looked furious at your interjection. “Don’t interrupt me!” He took steps towards you, hands on his hips. “Why the fuck did he answer your phone?”

“I was in the bath! I was telling him to hang up!”

“Didn’t hear that. Odd.”

“Yeah, because it would sound really suspicious if you could. Like I had something to hide!” you said defensively. “He’s stupid but he’s harmless. He didn’t know it was going to piss you off so much.”

“Sure, nothing to hide. I mean you even said you loved him in front of me.”

“I say that to all my friends. It didn’t mean—"

“And then I tell you to come home,” Tony interrupted you now, his voice rising, and you felt it about to boil over. “And what do you do? You can’t even follow that direction even though everything is perfectly laid out for you. Perfectly! Every little fucking step of the way! All you had to do was listen. But no! You have to go and make it difficult for no. good. goddamn. reason!”

He bellowed the last, slamming his hand down on one of your dressers, making you flinch back. He was burning holes into you with how intensely he was staring at you and you folded, your eyes downcast, heat coming to your cheeks. You did not like it when he yelled, especially when it was directed at you. You were truly regretting stoking his anger this much.

“Tell me why, Y/N!” Tony continued shouting. “Tell me why you have to push my fucking buttons! Why can’t you just be good?”

“I’m sorry,” you said hoarsely, tears stinging your eyes.

Tony inhaled deeply, exhaling shakily. He turned on his heel suddenly, leaving you alone in the closet. You heard him slam the bedroom door closed as he left.

You stood in silence, not knowing what to do. After a few minutes, you timidly walked out of the closet, finding the bedroom empty. You shuffled to the bed, sitting down tensely, waiting worriedly.

He returned to the bedroom, the buttons undone on his shirt along his chest and at his wrists. You knew it was because he was getting ready to put effort into making sure you learned your lesson and he would need all the range of motion he could get.

“Go,” he ordered you.

You followed his direction without a moment’s hesitation, knowing he wanted you in the room behind his study where all your toys were. The door in the bookcase was already open and you scurried inside, him on your heels.

His next demand came the moment you crossed the threshold, “Strip.”

You did as he asked hearing him close the door behind him. Quickly, you were standing naked before him. He was barely sparing you a glance, not taking the time to acknowledge you and that cut deep.

“The bench,” he ordered tautly.

Dragging your feet only a little at his icy demeanor, your body shook in anticipation. You climbed up onto the restraint bench, feeling the air move beside you as he came to stand by you. You chewed on your bottom lip, your head hanging, staying still as he tightened the restraints around your wrists and then moved down to your calves.

He was still not speaking to you past the curt commands, and you heard him walk off. You did not dare try to lift your head to follow him, keeping yourself curled in as much as you could. You thought worriedly of what whip or paddle he was going to choose to dole out your punishment. You prayed it was not the ball chain because that one would hurt. He had only used that one to stimulate you, but you only thought now of how much that impact would hurt if he used his full strength.

His footfalls met your ears and you twitched, trying to will yourself to not tense up because that was going to make it worse.

The sound cracked through the room and you gasped, your toes curling. There was no massage or build up to get you warmed up this time. He was using the leather slapper, the triple impact increasing the hit. One you knew all too well, whether it be for pleasure or to teach you a lesson. He was able to be close with it too, increasing his precision.

Tony had not asked you to count, so you did not before the second blow hit. You hissed when the third hit and tears stung when the fourth landed directly dead center across your ass. He was leaving small breaks in between but not too long. The next hit lower near your thighs and you choked out a whimper; he had done that on purpose, he knew it hurt. The next was higher and you could hear him breathing heavier. He was putting his back into the hits.

The tenth fell finally and you almost breathed in relief when you heard him walk away from you. Your ass was stinging, and you thought miserably of the bruises that were to show up.

He only gave you a moment’s reprieve. Tony’s hands were at your calves, undoing the restraints and he did the same for your wrists. Changing positions was bittersweet; your muscles stretched but the pain on your backside caused you to wince. Your legs shook as he helped you to your feet and he pulled you along to beside the bed. You thought for a moment he was going to let you lay down and relief began to flood through you, foolishly thinking that it had not been so bad after all. But you saw the pillows on the ground beside the bed and the toy mounted on the ground.

“On your knees,” he said letting go of your arm.

You painfully lowered to the ground, resting your knees on the pillows – something he had thankfully considered, you fleetingly thought.

Reflexively, you began to lower to rest your head on your elbows to release some pressure from your legs and he snapped his fingers at you, “No. Up.”

You did your best to bite back a complaint, sighing pathetically instead. You kept your eyes downcast still, not sending him a challenge with meeting his eyes.

The toy slid in slowly and your fingers flexed on the floor as you adjusted to it. Tony was controlling it, the speed, the depth. It was shallow at first, working you up. He was pacing and you could feel his stare as he watched the silicone go in and out. He had ultimate control of how hard you were going to get impaled and a first row seat to watch. You did your best to stay in the same position that he wanted, trying to be good. This was without restraints, he wanted you to do it on your own, and you wanted him to forgive you.

Tony turned on the vibrator setting suddenly, and you keened at the sensation. It dragged across your clit, sending reverberations through you as the toy continued thrusting in and out. You were growing slick, relaxing into the movement the deeper it plunged. The dull ache was being overpowered by the tightening in your core with every brush against your g-spot. It was getting harder now to not push back into the toy for more stimulation to release and come.

Fidgeting, your breath was becoming short as you felt yourself spiraling towards release.

Tony turned the toy off.

You blinked, feeling sorrow at the quickly dissipating high you had almost reached the apex of.

His breath was hot on your ear, “If you come on this toy, I’ll put you right back up on the bench. You got me?” You nodded and he demanded, “Answer me!”

“Yes, daddy,” you choked out pathetically. “I understand.”

“You better,” he warned, straightening back up. “You’re not coming until it’s on my dick and until you’ve proved you deserve it and earned my forgiveness, you’re not getting me.”

He only gave you a few more moments reprieve before the toy turned back on. You bit at your bottom lip, trying to ignore the sensation in the toy’s movements now that you knew what the stakes were. He was pacing again and you could imagine his glossed over eyes as he watched the toy sliding in past your folds, taking in the redness on your ass that he had put there. Your chest was rising and falling as you moved to try to keep your thoughts anywhere but here.

Tony pushed you right to the edge and when it was getting hard to ignore it, he turned it off again to your immense relief. Your breaths were coming short and heavy, your arms beginning to shake. You just wanted to lay down.

He started it up again and you let out a small cry. Everything was going to be so sore.

The sound of him walking away while the toy was still thrusting, at a slower pace thankfully, drew your attention and you almost turned your head to follow him. You managed to catch yourself at the last second, swallowing sharply and forcing yourself to look back down at the ground. The pressure was building quicker this time with how worked up you already were, and you hoped he was not gone for long. You did not want to come undone and disappoint him. And you sure as hell did not want to be back on the bench.

It felt like forever but logically it had to have been a handful of minutes. The toy was still thrusting steadily, working you gradually towards an orgasm rather than rushing. You could handle this. You could do this. It was going okay.

Until it was not. The dildo increased in speed and you sighed, closing your eyes tight. You heard a creak and you hoped it was him returning.

Another change, it moved deeper. And the vibration.

“Daddy, please,” you whimpered, unable to help yourself.

You knew he could hear you if he was still able to control the toy from where he was. He had not completely abandoned you. Broken, soft cries left your lips as your fingers dug into the floor, willing yourself to try to keep yourself from tumbling.

A gasp of relief exploded from you when the toy turned off. You heard the door open fully again and you sniffled, visibly shaking on your arms now as the toy retracted.

Tony’s shoes appeared in your line of sight and he swooped down, helping you stand. You were weak in the knees, letting him guide you. You mournfully watched the bed disappear from view as he moved you along towards the door back to his study. Where was he taking you now?

Hope blossomed at the sight of the light on in the bathroom down the hall. And your wishes were answered: he had drawn up a warm bath and you almost cried.

“There’s Epsom salt in there,” he told you stiffly.

“Thank you,” you said immediately.

He did not respond and instead put his hand in the water, testing the temperature. “It should be fine now.”

Lowering into the tub, you hissed half in pleasure feeling the warmth and half because of how sore your ass was, touching the bottom of the tub. Slowly, you relaxed, relishing in the tension release that was provided by the salts. Your eyes followed Tony freely now as he walked out of the bathroom.

When he returned, he had a pair of pajamas that he placed on the counter, before shooting you a look.

“Don’t stay in too long. It’s almost 2 in the morning. You need to sleep,” he said sternly. You nodded feebly and his eyes swept over you once before he turned on his heel and left the bathroom again.

<><><>

You woke up with your head buried in your pillow, your arms tucked safely underneath it. You had opted to sleep on your stomach, relieving the ache in your ass. You spotted that Tony’s side of the bed was still empty, which meant he had not come to bed. The bed felt cold without him, even though you were snuggled far underneath the blankets. Maybe he had slept in another room or on the couch. The thought of that only made you feel guilty.

You got out of bed, wincing at having to sit up to stand. Your leg caught as you moved, and you took a moment to stretch as much as you could. You pushed the button next to the window, opening the heavy curtains, letting the sun come in. Squinting against the light, you stared out over the ocean.

A couple of minutes of fresh air might do you some good, you thought sleepily.

Your hand fell onto the balcony door, the handle reading your fingerprint to unlock.

F.R.I.D.A.Y echoed over the speaker, “You are not authorized to open this door, Mrs. Stark.”

~~~

Forever tags: @coconutqueen21

Fic tags: @kvzctam, @farihafangirls, @teenageregression, @mrsnegan25

#tony stark x reader #dark!tony stark #dark tony stark #dark marvel fic #dark marvel #my shit

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panda-writes-kpop · 3 years

Text

Handong - Heartbreak Anthem (Part 4/Finale of BUS)

A/N: Hi guys, girls, and non-binary pearls! I hope you love the ending to this series, because I think the series as a whole is an important message to everyone.

Series Masterlist

TW: Mentions of driving, clubs, and a bittersweet ending to the series.

This ain’t a heartbreak anthem..

You smile as you go to turn on the radio in your car. Many moons ago, this would’ve caused you so much pain and grief. You didn’t really care anymore if that song came on the radio. It no longer had the power to ruin your day with a few soft melodies. You were once again reclaiming your life as your own, and you weren’t going to let anyone hurt you anymore.

When I saw you in the club six months ago, I thought I was going to break down and cry just like I did mere moments before we arrived. Surprisingly, I stayed strong as you came over to greet me. We exchanged a few awkward words before you introduced your partner to me. I wished you luck on your relationship, and then I left you two to be together. My best friend came to comfort me as soon as they noticed what happened, but I didn’t need that comfort. If you had moved on with your life, then I needed to as well. It didn’t matter if I took baby steps or big strides, because I would survive just as I did before I met you.

As luck would have it, that song immediately started blasting on my radio. I smiled as I recalled the happy memories and let go of the sad ones.

Everyone feels sad at one time or another, and it’s perfectly okay to. I just needed the strength to let go of something that wasn’t healthy for me. The sadness over you was valid, but my attachment and desire for your love wasn’t good for me at all. As soon as I started to let go, the sadness started to leave as well. People come and go in my life, and I’m glad that we spent those happy moments with each other.

I haven’t met anyone new yet, and I don’t think I’m ready to. I still need more time to process and let go of any remaining bad feelings, but we’re slowly getting there. I feel better every day, and I hope that you are doing as well as I am. You seem so happy in your new relationship, Dongie, and I’m so happy for you. I really do wish you nothing but the best.

I roll down my car window and let the words to the song roll off of my tongue.

Who cares what other people think? This is the best I’ve felt in months, and I’m sure it’d bring a smile to your face if you saw me now. Thank you, Handong, for every sweet moment, but more so for making me stronger than I ever was before.

...And I ain’t got no time to dwell on it.

#dreamcatcher imagines #dreamcatcher scenarios #dreamcatcher x reader #kpop x reader #dreamcatcher #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #handong scenarios #handong imagines #dreamcatcher handong #handong x reader #handong #Spotify

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soukokuwu · 4 years

Note

can i get uhhhh university au with dazai yeah okay

➥ genre: fluff, university!au

➥ pairing: dazai x reader

➥ synopsis: it’s your final year of university, and the infamous suicidal bastard has just returned.

➥ warning: mentions of suicide — it’s dazai

➥ word count: 2.1k

➥ a/n: sorry this took a while prod but here’s to me hoping you like this take on a university au ✨ only the second au i’ve done (apart from grim reaper dazai) but i hope it’s okay!!

Take a chance

Mumbles stir in the lecture hall as a tall, lanky man with brown hair and bandaged arms stroll in. You look past your friend’s head to see the infamous male take his time to get seated, far in the back corner away from everyone else. He’s awfully laid back for someone who’s half an hour late for class. But why wouldn’t he be? He’s —

“Dazai Osamu.”

Attendance after being away from school for a few months: taken.

You watch as he leans back in his seat, barely even listening to the lecture. His hands fumble in his awfully dirty brown satchel for something, and seconds later his fingers are thumbing on the pages of a book with a bright red cover.

The Complete Guide to Suicide.

What a name for a book. Not that you‘re surprised. Is that where he got the inspiration for his suicide attempt? That is what he is famous for. His failed suicide attempt a few months back. It got the whole school in an uproar. Nobody even knew what exactly happened, but all that anyone knew was that paramedics were spotted outside his house. And given how he’s always had bandages wrapped around nearly his entire body, everyone just assumed it was self-harm.

You never understood why nearly every girl swooned over him when he said the same thing to each one of them. That Dazai was always basking in the limelight, always sat in the most visible part of the room. That Dazai never caught your attention.

But this Dazai does. And as his gaze shifts from his book to you; you know in that moment — you catch his too.

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Attraction is a weird thing.

You spend the next few weeks simply observing him whenever he’s near. It’s intriguing — he’s intriguing. His change in behaviour, especially, is what piqued your interest. Why would an infamous casanova, who was already suicidal before, tone down his behaviour after an actual attempt? Is it enlightenment?

“Do you want to tell me what’s on your mind or should I coax it out of you?”

The smooth, velvety voice floats to your ears, startling you. You didn’t realise you had been staring in his direction for far too long. You gulp, looking around you. Anything sounds loud in the deathly silence of the library.

Dazai sits himself next to you and his eyes gloss over the book nestled between your palms. “Do you have an interest in photography?” he asks as he swiftly grabs the book from your hands and scans the pages. It’s a beginner’s guide to photography; you’d been meaning to try — that’s why you joined the photography club even though it’s your senior year.

“What does it matter to you?” you whisper back, shooting him a glare and attempting to get your book back. Dazai pulls it further away from you though, and he seems amused by your puzzled reaction.

That day he spends pestering you about what you like — for what reason, you have no idea. But you are flattered, somehow, and you entertain him. You don’t push it though, you don’t ask him what you’ve always been asking in your mind. It’s a touchy subject, and he’s surely aware of your curiosity, but even so you don’t say a thing.

It is the least you can do — to see Dazai for who he is, instead of what he’s done. Surely he’s gotten bored of that already.

And that is why Dazai stays with you for the rest of the day. You are vastly different than the others, and he hasn’t figured out why, but he figures it’s at least worth it to try.

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A photograph can capture powerful things, but there’s something it can never picture.

Click.

Dazai Osamu looks beautiful in picture, but the things he makes you feel — that’s the real treasure you hold dear, the thing that a photo can never capture. No, he isn’t your boyfriend — could you even call him your friend? You know next to nothing personal about him. Yet.

There are days when he’d sit next to you in lectures, much to the surprise of everyone else. Your friends knew to leave you two be — Dazai isn’t awfully friendly with anyone else. In fact, he rarely even spoke to anyone apart from you. It isn’t nearly as special as everyone makes it out to be though, they don’t know that your conversations mainly centre around the unimportant small talks. It isn’t anything lovey-dovey — and why did your heart sink a little thinking of that?

Other days you barely speak; just two acquaintances passing by each other in the hallways in exchanged silence. Those days you find yourself wanting to reach out — but there’s an unspoken fear that stops you.

“Hey, quit dreaming, my belladonna,” Dazai hums, smirking once he sees he’s caught your attention.

“Who’re you calling yours?” you snap back, positioning your right eye behind the camera lens and another ‘click!’ sounds in the empty classroom.

As you continue taking photographs of your muse, you can’t help but notice the way the bandages are wrapped around his arms more sloppily today than they were usually. You swallow the lump in your throat as the lens zoom in on his wrist, a seemingly fresh scar visible between the gaps in the bandages. You shift the focus onto his neck this time, and you see another scar there. You try not to make it too obvious that you are hovering the focus on them, but he knows anyway. Dazai always knows.

Click.

And then you have a realisation. As you straighten your posture and look up at him properly, your heart leaps when you catch that smile on his face. It isn’t a normal typical, happy smile. It’s much sadder, much... hollower than that. It’s nothing sinister, just helpless in a way. You’ve seen sad smiles before, but none quite as meaningful as his.

“You wanted me to see?” you ask, despite every muscle in your mouth begging you not to.

Neither you nor Dazai liked to get attached to anyone, but you’re about to make the both of you cross that line. Dazai knows that. And he lets you continue anyway. In fact, he dares you.

“Ask me.”

Do you dare?

“Why—” you bite your tongue, but then you peer at his inviting eyes, and feel a little more encouraged. “Why did you do it?”

“Do what?” His voice isn’t teasing, he isn’t trying to toy with you. Dazai knows there is a lot you wish to know about him, and he’s curious to know what’s been hanging on your mind the most.

It’s the same as everyone else’s answer, although when it comes from you, Dazai is most likely to see through how genuine it is. You don’t ask from mere nosiness. You care. And so he tells you while you continue to photograph him — everything that built up to that moment he used a razor to draw a deep vertical gash up his forearm, everything that contributed to that decision, that cry of defeat.

You try not to cry from just hearing his story, you didn’t want him to feel that you pitied him. Although maybe a part of you did, after all, why else would you crying then? But Dazai sees the way your fingers tremble, the camera following with.

“I can stop,” he offers. But you instantly shake your head. You want to hear about him, you want him to be able to tell his story to at least someone, even if it’s someone like you — someone who can barely do a thing.

But you can’t be more wrong, and you don’t realise it yet. Because you’re the first person he chooses to let in, and is reciprocating well, accepting him for who he is — someone beyond the scars, although they seem to be the main focus of your project. But he smiles as he sees you write up the title for it at the end of the day.

The things that make you beautiful.

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They say it’s possible to miss a moment while you’re still living it — that it’s bittersweet. And they were right. That’s how you felt after that day, in the empty classroom with him, about your entire senior year.

“When the school year ends I’m going abroad, there are some things I need to deal with.”

His words echo in your mind on a loop. Dazai didn’t have to explain anything further, you understood perfectly. The gentle tone of suppressed sadness you can never forget. He’s trying not to sound it, but you can still tell that whatever’s hurt him still does. That, though, he doesn’t hide from you.

The final school year goes without a hitch — your grades are up, a considerable thanks to Dazai for teaching you nearly everything. He’s highly intelligent for someone who looks like they put nearly no effort into school. He knows even about subjects that he doesn’t take.

Dazai is probably the only reason why your senior year goes better than you expected it to. Your photography project ended up beautiful. There isn’t a thing about Dazai in your pictures that is out of place. The lighting, the shot, the composition — you were satisfied with it all. But you never turned it in. You chose to hand in another less significant project.

Some things you just have to keep them close in your heart; some things are better kept private, intimate.

Some moments make you feel like time is at a standstill — for you, they‘re usually the ones that you treasure most. Like the way his arms casually brush against yours as the two of you walk out of school together, the way he puts his arm around your shoulders when you bug him for a picture together, or even the way he accidentally falls asleep on your shoulder on the bus ride home. It’s these small things that tug on your heartstrings.

But time waits for no one. And graduation day came faster than you expected. Dazai is missing that day, and you find yourself anxious. Did he do something to himself? Or did something happen to him along the way? You find out he never opted to participate in the ceremony at all though, through your friends no less. Why didn’t he tell you?

You can’t manage to stop fidgeting as you wait in line to receive your degree on stage. It’s obvious to everyone but you — and then you get a text.

Stop being so nervous, belladonna, you look gorgeous today.

You try to look around for him in the crowd, but everyone looks like minuscule dots on a canvas; you can’t see clearly.

I’ll meet you after it ends, I’m so proud of you.

And he does. He walks towards you with a bouquet of flowers in his hand, but you just charge toward him and throw your arms around him, with Dazai twirling you on the spot once you do. You feel like you can’t be any happier until your eyes catch the suitcase he’s trudged along beside him.

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It takes absence to value presence.

That’s how you’ll feel after he enters through those doors to the departure area, you’re sure of it. That’s why you’re sheepishly holding on to his sleeve like a child. A silent question you pose to him: do you really have to go?

And the answer lay in his apologetic smile.

“I planned on leaving while you were at the graduation ceremony, but I pushed my flight back.”

You furrow your brows as you meet his gaze. It takes you back to the first time he laid eyes on you from across the lecture hall.

“Why?”

“I wanted to see my beautiful belladonna graduate,” Dazai replies coolly, tousling your hair gently. But you both know there’s more to it than that. There’s one other thing, one other reason he wanted to leave while you were occupied: Dazai Osamu is horrible at goodbyes. It’s why he tried to kill himself only when his roommates weren’t home too. And yet he’s willing to try for you.

This is one moment you wish would last forever. You didn’t want to have to say goodbye. Is this farewell? Would you ever see him again? You didn’t even dare to ask, you’re too afraid of the answer.

But you find the answer as he turns to head for the gate. The way he lightly presses a kiss on the top of your head, the way his heart pounds erratically against your chest as he hugs you goodbye, the way he doesn’t tell you a sayonara, and in the way only Dazai knows how.

There are many things that are left unspoken between you and Dazai. And as you wave goodbye and watch him disappear in the crowd, you have the utmost confidence that one day the fog will clear and everything will fall into place, that your one day of clarity will come.

And that one day you will meet Dazai Osamu once again.

tags: @yokelish @gogolparadise @fyowyn-writes

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babykatsu · 4 years

Text

PAIRING: katsuki bakugou x fem!reader

WORDCOUNT: n/a

RATING: sfw ☁️

GENRE: angst, fluff if you squint

WARNINGS:honestly just kinda sad,no sexual acts, aged up, unrequited love.

⤷ SYNOPSIS: time heals but not in your case. of course it didn’t heal anything. As days passed, it turned to weeks and months and eventually years of you burying down your feelings for katsuki. but nothing could erase the compassion you held for him... maybe after years of bottling up everything, it was time to speak out.

AUTHORS NOTE:

I SPELT IT WRONG IN THE TITLE SORRYYY🥺i’m just going to say sorry in advance for this fic😅😅 i just felt angsts and wrote up something in an hour so here you goooo. pls don’t read if you want something fluffy🥺

‘la douleur exquise

(n.) the heart wrenching pain of wanting the affection of someone unattainable.’

your eyes scanned the magazine, eyes gently falling onto the ‘word of the day’ section. The irony in the chosen word bringing the all to familiar sting in your heart to burst. After years of distancing yourself and trying to move on, your stupid feelings for the boy never went away. Even when you tried to sit down and do one thing to distract your mind from the male who swirled never endlessly in your mind, of course something would bring the memory of him back.

It sucked. No matter where you looked, he was there. Not physically of course, but symbolically.

You want to go out and eat? suddenly you over hear someone ordering the spiciest dish on the menu. You want to listen to music? the song is about unrequited love. You want to go out for a hike? you get stupid mountain climbing leaflets bombarding your vision. HELL, you want to literally just breathe and his scent surrounds you.There’s no escape.

In frustration, you shut the magazine that rested atop your kitchen counter and ignored its existence. This must be some cruel joke. It’s not fair. Maybe it’s selfish to think that way but it’s hard to not wish things were different. Out of all the people in the world it had to be you, stuck with feelings that never faded no matter your countless attempts to rid yourself or them. Fate was really having a laugh, shoving stupid relations of bakugou your way. From his hobbies and interests to his heroic work to flood your social media timeline. It had to be a cruel joke. But unfortunately it wasn’t. This was your reality.

You deeply inhaled as you restated your head in your palms, your elbows on the counter as you dangled your feet from the chair you sat in. You usually refused to let your mind wonder like this, torturing itself with the thought of him, the man you desired most in the world. But today was different, you let the reminiscing come and go as it pleased, taking every smooth emotion blow that came with.

Your thought of your time at u.a, the simpler times. The memory of when you and bakugou had hung out alone for the first time, taking a stroll in some park you didn’t remember the name of. But you remembered one thing for certain, that day you fucked everything up for yourself and fell for the glistening look in his vermillion eyes. you saw a side of him you never even thought existed. Selflessly, he gave you his jacket to you as he watched shivers roll down your body as the evenings cold grew deeper, he cracked a couple jokes and gently wrapped his arm around your shoulder.

It may have just been in a friendly way looking back on it now, but you didn’t know any better at the time. That’s when another thought surfaced.

Graduation day. The way you watched the boy you grew to love slowly fade as time withered away. You smiled and laughed along with the other students but you couldn’t help the glances you shot bakugous way, glances he never returned instead keeping his focus else where. You hadn’t seen him since then. The bittersweet memory of the last hug you two shared that afternoon before going your separate ways. No exchange in mumbers, confessions or the cliche kiss. none of it.

You fell for him when he gestured kindness your way, tricking yourself that the feeling was mutual.

Tears glossed your eyes, blurring your vision, the dim yellow lights in your kitchen scattering across your vision. It’s so pathetic to cry over a boy but you couldn’t help it. Words couldn’t describe the feelings you harboured for him. He was unattainable and you knew it. The countless times he’d reject other girls, constant mention of him not wanting relationships and the blatant friendzoning you received. The signs were all there. Only if you actually noticed it at the time, you wouldn’t be in this predicament now.

You’d do anything to have another chance with him. You couldn’t do anything in peace without the memory of him invading your space. You couldn’t have him, and that only made you want him more. He’s too far out of reach now.

Your tears soon rushed out, trickling down your flushed cheeks, softly splattering on the counter. In frustration you bunched your fists, slamming them down. This isn’t fucking fair. Why can’t this feeling just leave with him? why are you haunted with this draining emotional baggage?

Life isn’t fair...

Years of hoping he’d finally come around only to be left in the dark. Not that you blamed him, he didn’t know how you felt, or at least he avoided it. Another whole year of trying to drown out the feeling, completely unsuccessful. Maybe if you just confessed you’d get closure, maybe even a chance with him? You’re probably just feeding yourself false hope again but you can’t keep these emotions inside you any longer, it hurts too much.

You blinked the tears out your eyes, hoping they’d stop pouring out soon as you grabbed your phone. Twitter. It didn’t take long to find his profile.

Your eyes scanned his profile for a minute, admiring the cocky smirk that sprawled across his lips as he posed for a photo taken by Kirishima, kaminari in the background grinning at the camera. You couldn’t help but smile at the photo as well. You’re glad Katsuki is happy, but the selfish side of you wishes you were the cause for the smile on his face. Before you find something you’d regret seeing on his profile, your finger darts to direct message him. A nervous pit boiled at the bottom of your somach, nervous to shoot him a message. this is far too awkward. Your mouth ran dry as you stared at the glass screen.

It all happened so fast. He was on the way to your apartment after a few other exchanges in text. Fuck. Impulsive emotional decision making is never ideal.

For a moment, you wonder if this will finally be your happily ever after, the one where you so desperately craved to soothe the burning feeling that tormented you. Maybe fate would finally do you a favour and give you a helping hand. Maybe, just maybe.

A loud set of knocks hit your front door. Your heart sank as your nerves kicked in. That was fast.

You wanted to stall for time and not open the door so quickly, maybe even calm down before you were greeted by him for the first time in forever. But there was no time, you promised you wouldn’t waste it.

Speeding to the door, you unlocked it and peered your head through. Knees instantly week as you felt faint at the site of him. Not because of his good looks or anything, but his presence felt so foreign to you now you couldn’t help but feel like this moment wasn’t real. Nervously, you swallowed the lump in your throat.

“want to come in?” you gestured towards the male as you opened the door wider.

You watched him, analysing his expressions, his stance, his clothes. He wore some loose black joggers, paired with the same coloured tank top and sneakers. The familiar jacket warming his body, the jacket he generously offered you time ago.

“no. just get it over and done with” He was most likely grumped than usual due to his lack of sleep.

you were nervous to begin, but you had to let this all out. finally. One last deep breath before you started talking. Suddenly, excitement flooded your system at the prospect of him feeling the same.

“Listen, i’m glad you came all the way here. Honestly. I just wanted to say that, i know it’s strange but i really like you Katsuki”

He cringed at the first name basis as you began your talk.

“I’ve liked you for a long time but i never had the guts to confess. I’m sorry, i know it’s been so long and you’ve probably forgetting everything by now. you know, us being friends and all-“

you wanted to continue talking, the confession bringing a strange soothing feeling to you. But your words were cut short by bakugou.

“Is that all you wanted to say?” his facial expression was unreadable.

“i’m not interested. never was. never will be y/n”

The sudden rejection hit you hard. The little bit of hope you had soon vanished. This wasn’t some fairytale, he wasn’t just magically going to fall for you after all this time. Your dreams were shattered, heart sore and empty as you felt yourself at a loss for words.

“i’m sorry. you deserve better” he spoke once more, his significantly larger hand resting on top of your shoulder.

“but you wasted my time”

you wanted to yell at him, speak maybe. just say anything but your words choked up in your throat. You wasted his time? does he know how much of your time you had wasted on him and you couldn’t even do anything about it. Maybe the rejection will set you free.

You watched as he pulled away, saying his goodbye before shutting the front door behind him. You couldn’t even cry now. he’s gone for good.

He still is unattainable. I guess you could say that the ‘word of the day’ really applied to you right now.

la douleur exquise.

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lemill1on · 4 years

Text

ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

izuku midoriya x reader

song: crash my car by coin

Music thumped through the soles of your sneakers, some upbeat pop song you were sure someone in your class knew the lyrics to by heart. You moved through the rented beach house, occasionally taking sips from the red plastic cup in your hand as you wandered.

It was bittersweet, attending a party celebrating the end of your time at UA. You were sure to see most of your classmates as fellow pros, but you couldn’t shake the sneaking suspicion that this would be your last chance to make a lasting impression before everyone went their separate ways.

Tonight’s the last chance you have to tell Todoroki how you really feel, you thought to yourself as you leaned against a wall, taking a shaky sip of beer as your eyes scanned the room for any signs of his two-toned hair. You’d been nursing a crush on him for the better part of your four years at UA, only ever close enough to be considered a friend.

Sure, the two of you had your moments, but they didn’t amount to the spark you saw him have with other girls. Girls that were prettier, smarter, with stronger Quirks than yours. You sighed into your drink, shutting your eyes as you let the bass flow through you. You were sure Jiro was the DJ for the night, the pop music divided by songs that you could only guess were requests.

You wondered if any of the love songs were meant for someone, if you could say what you’d always wanted to through the speakers rather than your words. Would he even know it was you, or would he just think it was another song? He probably didn’t even know you liked him...

“Hey Y/n, you see Midoriya anywhere?”

Your drink dangerously sloshed as you jumped, the sound of Mirio’s voice at your side snapping you out of your thoughts. Your gaze slowly turned to see his head protruding from the wall, blue eyes gazing up at you with the twinkle only alcohol could give them.

“Nope. I didn’t even know he was coming.”

Mirio stuck his head out a bit more, shifting so he was level with you. “I didn’t either, but Nejire said she’d seen him lookin’ for someone. I thought you’d know, y’know ‘cause you’re together so much.”

You cringed slightly. As much as you liked Midoriya, there was something you couldn’t quite place in the way that he talked to you as of late. He was far from cold—you didn’t think he was capable of that, to be honest—but you didn’t have the same rapport that you’d grown accustomed to over the years.

You took a pointed sip and pushed off of the wall, giving Mirio a quick goodbye before you downed the rest of your drink and made your way to the kitchen, taking a few gulps of your second cup before you resumed your aimless wander. You stopped every once in a while to talk to your classmates, promising that you’d keep in touch....the usual graduation pleasantries. There was still no sign of Midoriya or Todoroki, and by the time you were halfway through your third cup you decided to abandon the search.

It didn’t take long for you to find your way to the back of the house, sitting out on the balcony while a few kids from class 1-B passed around a bottle of vodka, taking long pulls before passing it on to the few 1-A students that had joined them.

You found yourself stumbling into the house not five minutes later, wondering if Todoroki had even shown up in the first place. What’s the point? You thought, he doesn’t give a shit about me. As the party wound down your thoughts ambled to Midoriya, doubting that he’d come like Mirio had said. He was the last person you’d expect to be at a party, much less one where half the people attending were drunk off their asses.

Izuku had been looking for Y/n all night. After a lengthy talk with All Might two nights prior, he’d finally made up his mind to tell her that he’d been in love with her for years. That every moment they spent together—every late night study session, every holiday, every meal, every stolen glance and warm smile—made all the hurt he’d felt melt away.

She’s not here, she probably already left with someone else...Izuku sighed, dejectedly making his way out of the house to head back home. He’d spent all this time watching her chase boys that were better than him in every way, why did he think now would be any different? As much as he wished it was true, he’d never be the kind of hero she needed.

It was better to just make peace with it now.

He managed to slip out unnoticed, thankful that he’d been able to take his own car to the party. His thoughts raced, each looping back to how stupid he’d been to think that he’d ever have a fighting chance with you. It was probably for the best that he left now anyway, she wouldn’t even notice he was gone—

“Midoriya! C’mere!”

He blinked twice, slowly turning to see Y/n stumbling toward him, a wide grin stretched across her face. Her eyes were glassy and unfocused, each drunk step toward him one that felt oddly calculated, as if it was taking all of her strength to remain upright.

“H-Hey Y/n! I, uh, I didn’t think you were still here.” He hated how awkward he sounded, the nervous tremor in his voice that of someone who had just been caught doing something they weren’t supposed to, instead of the confidence one should have talking to someone they’d known for so long.

“Hey you...you have a car, right?” Y/n leaned forward, catching herself on Izuku’s shoulder. “Can you....do you know where—where I live?”

Oh god, she wants me to take her home?! I can’t say no...what if I tell her then? She’ll probably fall asleep anyway, she won’t even hear it! Yeah, I’ll just...I’ll tell her how I feel, and then I won’t have to worry about it anymore. But what if she is awake, and she rejects me—

“Heeey, Deku? You’re...you’re talkin’ to yourself again,” Y/n mumbled, giving him an easy smile when his gaze drifted back up to hers.

“S-Sorry.” He returned the smile, knowing that his probably looked more forced than he wanted it to. “My car’s parked over there, if you—if you want me to take you home.”

Y/n’s eyes lit up. “Perfect! Y’know, you’re so nice for doing this,” she followed behind him, grabbing onto his hand to steady herself, making his heart leap to his throat, “you’re just nice, Midoriya.”

“Oh, uh, thanks, Y/n.” He helped her into the car, making sure she was situated before he slipped into the driver’s seat, taking a deep breath before he started the car and pulled out into the street.

It wasn’t long before Y/n had slumped against the window, her eyes shut and breathing slowed. He’d been trying to psych himself up to tell her, but every time he opened his mouth to talk he convinced himself it was a bad idea and let the silence remain.

Your eyes fluttered open, the realization that you were driving home hitting you slowly. You kept your gaze on the rolling highway, the glow of the lights casting tinted shadows across your face. You could hear a soft sigh to your left, Midoriya’s voice filling the vast silence of the car before you could turn to look at him.

“Y/n I...I know you’re probably still asleep or whatever, and that’s for the best, I mean, I don’t want to embarrass myself in front of you—“ he exhaled, his grip tightening on the wheel, “I...ugh, I don’t know how to say this.”

You didn’t think it possible in your current state, but you felt your heart pick up as you listened to Midoriya collect himself, the deep breaths he took the ones you’d heard so many times before, ones prompted by you when his thoughts started to run wild.

“I...” there was a small pause and a sigh of determination, “remember when we first went to go eat lunch at the park by UA, and you told me that you’d never had your first kiss before?”

You wanted to nod, but stayed still so you could hear him talk.

“I never told you—I mean why would I?—but I always kinda hoped I’d be your first kiss. And I know that’s pretty silly, you’re not even interested in me, but I just wanted to be the kind of person that you wanted to be with.”

You could remember that day like it was yesterday. The two of you had gone to eat lunch while the cherry blossoms fell, your hair dusted with pink petals as you exchanged food and secrets. it was then that you’d learned at least some of the true nature of Midoriya’s Quirk, even if you felt like it wasn’t the whole story. You’d promised to keep his secret if he promised to keep yours, that shy admission that you’d never done the kinds of things you always dreamed of. Even now, years later, you were still waiting for someone to sweep you off your feet.

“I know I’m not as powerful as everyone else in our class, but I always hoped that one day I’d be the one that could make you smile. I—I wanted to be your hero.

“But you were—are—so strong Y/n, you don’t need someone to save you. And even if you did, I knew that person wouldn’t be me.” He sighed softly, stealing a glace at you before he continued. “Even if you didn’t need me like that, I still wanted to be there for you. To be with you.

“I’d go anywhere with you, Y/n. Spending time with you....it’s my favorite part of the day,” he softly chuckled, “ugh, that’s so cheesy. But it’s true. I always kinda hoped I’d get to spend the rest of my life—however long that is—with you.”

You felt something wash over you that you’d never felt before. In all the years you’d known Midoriya, you’d never thought of him as the person you’d have a future with. You’d never considered him as anything more than a friend, much less the person you’d fall in love with.

But as you pulled off the highway, driving past quaint homes and the lives people had built for themselves, you saw Midoriya as the person he always had been. The one who was there for you no matter what, your shoulder to cry on, the first person you told good news. He was the first person you thought of when you wanted to go on an adventure, the one you always glanced to in class when you had to pick a partner. You’d spent so much time looking in the wrong places that you didn’t listen when your heart told you he was the one you’d been looking for all along.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is...I love you, Y/n. And I always will, no matter what happens.” He looked to you once again, his green eyes meeting yours, blush settling in his cheeks as he flicked his gaze to the road.

And for the first time, you didn’t see the kid with a Quirk too powerful for his body. You didn’t see your first friend, the wide-eyed boy who they whispered didn’t belong.

You saw someone who really was meant to be the number-one hero. Someone whose heart was pure, who smiled even when things seemed hopeless. You’d never quite believed it before, but you could see now that it was his destiny. He was meant for greatness, and you wanted to be there to see it.

You wanted to be the one to patch up his injuries, to welcome him home with a loving embrace after you watched him save the world. It was now that you saw his true strength, his physical power and mental fortitude, and the future with him that was filled with a love you’d never felt. Something deep and beautiful, bright as the sun.

Just like him.

“I think I love you too, Izuku,” You whispered, watching the shine in his eyes as he turned onto your street, his face aglow with the light of the street lamp you’d parked under.

You knew then, as your eyes met, that he’d always be there to drive you home. He’d do anything for you, and you him. Because this was what love truly was, not one-sided chasing or lovelorn heartbreak, it was doing anything for the person you cared about the most.

It was slipping your hand into your best friend’s, glowing as your lips met for the first time.

#midoriya x y/n #midoriya x reader #izuku x reader #izuku mydoria #mha #bnha #my hero academia fic #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #boku no hero fanfic #fanfic #x reader

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thejakeformerlyknownasprince · 4 years

Text

All right, more writing advice has occurred to me, as promised, so here it is.

Writing Advice #2: Find a scene you like in a story you enjoy and dissect it.

I say a scene you like, not a scene you love, because honestly you’re probably never going to enjoy the scene again by the time you’re done. BUT.

Find a good scene in a good book, and list as many observations about the scene as you possibly can. Figure out: what does that scene accomplish? How does it follow on from past scenes? How does it set up future scenes? What does it do for the characters and/or plot? Most importantly, how did the author make it do that? Do it in a macro level, for plot and character and theme. Do it on a micro level, for individual word choices.

I’ll use an example from #22: The Solution, because this is me and I never shut up about Animorphs. And I’m gonna do just a macro-level breakdown, to see how that scene fits within the book to understand why I like it so much.

One of my favorite scenes from #22 involves the entire extended Berenson family crowding into a hospital room to witness the “miraculous” “recovery” of “Saddler” — really David using Saddler’s DNA to sneak into Saddler’s family — before Jake and Rachel, the only two Berensons in the know, step out into the hallway. In classic Berenson style they deal with their feelings by shouting and nearly coming to blows... but they gradually open up to each other about the fact that they’re both feeling scared and helpless right now. They actually hug, the only time we ever see Jake and Rachel show that much affection, and resolve to handle this David-Saddler situation together. The Hallway Scene (as Cates and I call it) is p. 107 - 113 in #22, most of Chapter 21.

So how does Applegate set that scene up?

First of all, we get exposition on the Saddler situation. It comes up twice earlier in the book — once in the form of Naomi giving Rachel an update while Rachel staggers off to bed after fighting David all night, once in the form of Jordan seeking Rachel’s big-sister comfort about the situation in a conversation Rachel later realizes David overheard. Both of those moments mean it makes sense when Rachel’s struggle against David gets interrupted by her mom bringing her to the hospital to visit an injured cousin. That moment with Jordan also sets up David’s decision to kill and replace Saddler, while on the surface being a tough-but-sweet moment between sisters. So the reader understands the Saddler situation pretty well, and thus it’s equipped to drive the plot. We also don’t need exposition about it during The Hallway Scene, and can thus focus on just the characters there.

Second, we get Jake and Rachel’s dynamic. The book opens with Rachel going into a rage and promising to murder David when she discovers Jake lying on the floor of the mall. Through the planning and execution of the Hulk Smash the team does on the G8 summit, we see that Jake and Rachel work together seamlessly during emergencies — and that they fall into bickering once the emergency ends. Later, we get Rachel’s first attempt to confront Jake about his willingness to use her as a weapon against David as they’re on Jake’s front porch, only to have Jake cut Rachel off with a reminder that Tom is inside the house. All of these scenes build up the tension between Jake and Rachel but allow it no release until The Hallway Scene.

Third, we get the mood. Rachel misses her first night of sleep in the opening sequence, when Ax gets her out of bed and she ends up hunting David clear until dawn. Rachel misses her second night of sleep when the Animorphs resort to a smash ‘n’ burn on the G8 summit. Rachel misses her ability to catch up on sleep when Jordan comes into her room, and then David reveals he’s been in her room as well for an unknown amount of time. Not only has she been without rest for the past three days, she’s been unable to relax anywhere: David might be in her house, David might be in her school, David might be in Cassie’s barn, David might be Marco, David might be crawling on her skin. Rachel and Jake’s confrontation is dangerously close to being public — they’re in a hallway of a hospital — but they’re exhausted and have nowhere else to go.

Fourth, the book sets up the contrast between appearance and reality within the Berenson family. Obviously the whole series is about how appearances are misleading, but this book has several moments with Rachel reflecting on her mall-rat past self and realizing that that girl is a killer now. There’s also the moment where she says “[Jake] was sitting there, looking like any other kid stuck in any other boring minivan. If you saw him walk down the street you might think, Oh, there’s a nice-looking guy... /But then, I guess that’s true of everyone. You can never be sure whether the pretty blond lugging a pair of bulging Express bags through the mall is just another sweet, ditzy, harmless mall rat. /Or me.” Rachel is conscious that the Berenson family is simultaneously the most “nice-looking” (white, upper-class, close, mostly nuclear) and in some ways the messiest family even on their whole team of messy families.

Their very closeness is what makes Tom’s yeerk so capable of hurting Jake and Steve — as Tobias points out in #31, any yeerk in his family could just tell his guardians to fuck off and that’d be the end of it. Their very closeness is what enables Jake to trust Rachel up to the point of asking her to commit murder, and what enables Rachel to trust Jake up to the point of committing murder on his say-so. But it’s not until The Hallway Scene that we see Rachel’s understanding of “appearances are deceiving, especially in this family” and her understanding of “I’m a lot more scared of myself than anyone realizes” coalesce onto the epiphany of “oh wait, Jake feels the same way I do.”

So how does that scene set up the rest of the book?

This breakdown’s a little simpler, because this scene is 75% of the way through the book and 95% of the way through the trilogy.

First, it takes away a lot of David’s power, because being vulnerable with each other allows Rachel and Jake bring the team dynamic back in line. All of a sudden David’s attempts to sow discord — calling Rachel a monster, gloating about killing Tobias, pretending to be Marco — shift from being terrifying and heartbreaking to being... there. Rachel has all the power in that scene in the Taco Bell, even though David continues to think that he has the power, and part of the reason that’s true is that she has her team at her back now.

Second, it sets up the resolution. The Hallway Scene allows Jake and Rachel to confront their own brutality, and to a certain extent they choose to embrace that brutality because they see no other way out of the situation. Thus Jake green-lights Cassie’s plan to trap David as a rat, and Rachel does the dirty work of executing that plan.

Third, it prepares several other moments of uniquely brutal vulnerability between these two later on in the series. Jake morphs howler for the first time while cradled between Rachel’s grizzly-bear paws, because she’s the one he trusts to kill him instantly if he can’t control the morph (#26). Rachel spends the entirety of #37 denying that she got a civilian killed until the moment she can finally talk to Jake about it, and Jake all-but confesses to having done the same. Jake can’t bring himself to ask Rachel directly to kill Tom in a suicide mission, but Rachel understands what he’s saying all the same, and makes him agree in exchange not to blame himself for their deaths (#53).

Fourth, it shifts the mood away from the kids feeling more and more trapped in their ever-shrinking corner, toward the kids realizing they’ve all got each other in that corner. David’s fate is a terrible secret binding the team together, and it’s the reason that these six never really trust anyone but each other ever again in the series. Jake’s scared of himself, Rachel’s scared of herself, but at least from here on out they can be scared together.

Why’s The Hallway Scene so impactful?

Contrast, mostly. For instance, Applegate could’ve written a scene where Rachel reacts to finding out that Michelle’s and the other vets’ intervention kept Jake alive long enough for him to demorph and survive David’s attack. There could’ve even been a scene with Rachel hugging Jake in a thank-god-you’re-alive way, processing the earlier emotion of having found him dying on the floor of the mall. However, if we had gotten that moment, then it wouldn’t be nearly as surprising or as bittersweet when Jake and Rachel hug in the hospital hallway. In canon, we get told-not-shown about the aftermath of Jake being rescued, and Rachel just assumes that neither she nor Jake needs a hug after all that because they’re Built Berenson Tough and must be fine.

Another hypothetical: Applegate could’ve set that same scene somewhere safe for them to talk freely, like the clock tower or another location David doesn’t know. Or she could’ve set the scene somewhere completely unsafe, like Saddler’s hospital room where both Tom and David are within earshot. However, setting it somewhere completely safe would raise the possibility that Jake and Rachel morph and attempt to do real violence to each other. The scene wouldn’t work as well if they had quite that much freedom of expression, and quite that little urgency about talking things out right now. Setting it somewhere unsafe might have interesting implications if they’re forced to use doublespeak the whole time (as we see them doing on the phone) but wouldn’t allow them enough space to be as emotionally vulnerable as we see them being in canon. Forcing them to have the appearance of a normal conversation from a distance, while also allowing them to say what they will without fear of eavesdroppers, gives us exactly the right balance of tension.

How’d Applegate to it?

Not in the first draft, I guarantee you. Attempting to fit a scene that well into a book that doesn’t yet fully exist is quite simply impossible. Maybe there was a scene where Rachel gave Jake a thank-god-you’re-not-dead hug after Michelle fixed him, and it got taken out later. Maybe the Saddler situation was originally explained as Rachel was already on her way to the hospital, and the exposition got deliberately moved to an earlier and less-tense moment in the plot. Point being, it took writing and rewriting and rerewriting to get the book to fit together that well, and the same is true of any book that flows well in its entirety.

My other guess about what went on behind the scenes: lots of prewriting. Lots of outlining the whole series, lots of “what would Rachel do?”, lots of research on elephants and rats and dolphins and eagles.

All of that is work. All of that is a pain. All of that is returning to a project even after the glow of initial excitement is gone. All of that is fighting the urge to scream and yeet the draft after getting criticism. But books don’t function if you don’t put that much work into them.

#animorphs #writing #writing advice #animorphs meta #22 #the solution #berenson feels #rachel berenson #animorphs spoilers #asks #anonymous

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ugh-supersoldiers · 4 years

Text

It Won’t Be Long

MASTERLIST

Characters: Bucky x reader

Summary: Somehow distance is everything as much as it is nothing at all when it comes to the love you have for Bucky Barnes.

Warnings: Angst & fluff, really bittersweet (but there will likely be a part two that’s allllll fluff), this is a fic about Bucky and the reader dealing with being separated during social distancing so if that’s triggering please don’t read!

Words: 2314

A/N: This is for everyone missin’ someone while in social distancing who might need a little reminder that it won’t last forever (and for anyone who just loves some good ol fashioned bucky barnes charm). I’ve seen so much longing on my dash and I just want to say, I feel you, I love you, you will get through this, you will see the ones you love again. I wish everyone health and wellbeing.

AND AS ALWAYS REBLOGS AND FEEDBACK ARE MEGA APPRECIATED.

Missing someone is hard, even when it’s necessary.

Keep yourself away from everyone, at least six feet apart at all times. Stay in your own place of residence, don’t pay a physical visit to anyone under any circumstances. Avoid any kind of contact with anyone especially those outside of your immediate household for all reasons unless urgent.

Quarentine. You knew it wouldn’t be easy, you’d anticipated it; emotionally prepared for it, but longing for the presense of someone you love simply can’t be rehearsed into familiarity.

Longing inters like you smoke; licking up the walls and permeating even your most primive and forgotten senses until it renders itself all comsuming; suffocating, and in a twist of cruel irony it will scorch the safety of the very fire it specters.

Longing turns loving someone into torment.

Bucky Barnes. It had been months since you’d been with him.

Months.

You had phonecalls, and videochats, and texting, but it could never match up to his physical presense. It’s amazing the things about someone you realize you took for granted when you’re forced into separation.

Even so much as being in the same room as him felt like something you should have thanked god for at the time.

You’d wanted so desperately to be able to stay with him, to have him live in your apartment with you until social distancing laws were lifted, and that was almost an option - until it wasn’t.

Bucky’s anatomy rendered him in no serious danger of infection, and knowing this as soon as ‘quarentine’ entered his ears he had reached out to every medical facility around to see how he could help. The answers mostly consisted of small routine jobs that doctors and nurses struggled to find the time for, until one really struck him: let us use your biological makeup to see if it helps us solve puzzle of vaccine development.

He’d never signed on to something so quickly in his life.

“My soldier,” You’d laughed, “Always fighting for what’s right, even when it’s not his war.”

“It’s everyone’s war, doll. I’m just doing my part, like everyone else.” He’d replied.

It was true, Bucky would recover quickly from the virus in the extremely rare case that he were to contract it at all, but his work on the vaccine didn’t make him invulnerable to being a carrier and he refused to risk your life in the process of trying to help save so many.

And so, you had spent your time in your apartmen and he at the compound unless at a medical facility being poked and prodded for the sake of humanity.

It was ungodly early in the morning, nearly three. Far too early to be making a video call, but the world had come to a screeching hault months ago and since then time didn’t seem to matter all that much. And you knew for a fact that he’d still be awake.

You sipped at the tea in your mug as you sat on your bed, reaching for your phone. Your finger hovered over his contact for a moment, a last hesitation as you wondered if perhaps he was sleeping, but it didn’t stop you.

He answered after a single ring.

“I know it’s stupidly early, but I miss you so much and I don’t know what to do with myself because of it.” You whispered immediately, knowing there was little point in offering a salutation.

You could see his face illuminated by the light of his phone screen as he sat cross legged on his bed. His hair was tied back, but a few stray pieces had fallen back onto his face. He looked to be wearing a sweater. It was a soft green. He looked perfect.

“I wasn’t sleeping (Y/N), don’t worry,” He said, “I miss you too, like you wouldn’t believe but it won’t be long now, I promise.”

He tried his best to reassure you, but you both knew he couldn’t really make that promise. There was no guarentee how much more time would pass until you could be together again.

“I hate this, I can’t do it anymore. I feel like I’m losing my mind.”

You were sitting with your covers pulled over your shoulders, sometimes bring a mug to your lips to sip at it. The warm glow of the fairy lights that you’d wrapped around your bedframe gave romantic definition to your features. He could swear he’d never seen something more beautiful in his life, but he thought that every single time he’d been able to see your face since he last saw it in person.

“You’re not going crazy, I would’ve told you by know if you were.” He winked.

The small laugh he earned from you made him smile, even if he could hear the subtly of the tears you were fighting.

“I love you, (Y/N). This is hard, baby, but you have to stay safe for me. We’ll make it, I know we will.”

“I know, Buck. I just feel like a piece of me missing when you’re not around.”

A tear had finally fallen from your waterline and onto your cheek. You quickly wiped it away in hopes he wouldn’t notice. He did.

His face read as if he was in physical agony. He couldn’t stand seeing you like this, but he knew there was nothing he could do other than try his best to make sure you knew he loved you, he missed you, and that this wouldn’t last forever.

“Just think about how great it’ll be when we see each other again.” He whispered, abandoning the crease in his brow in exchange for a small smile.

“It hurts to think about that.” You admitted, trying to swallow the lump in your throat.

You’d purposefully tried your best not to think about it too much for that reason, in fact.

“Maybe, but it’s something to look forward to isn’t it?” He pondered, “This feels like forever, but it isn’t. We’re guarenteed to have that moment someday, so why not imagine it? It’s better than this, baby.”

You stared at him in complete awe for a moment as you remembered the man you’d met years ago. The one who couldn’t even so much as bare eye contact with someone for more than a second before looking away, or handle even the lighted touch. That same man, after so much perseverance and growth, was now explaining to you the benefit of looking forward to life’s guarenteed happy moments.

“I’m so proud of you, Buck.”

“What?” He chucked, running a hand down his face in amusement, “Not that I don’t love it when you kiss my ass, but where’d that come from, doll?”

“I’m not kissing your ass, Barnes,” You chided playfully, “I’m telling you the truth. You’ve come a long way from the person you were when you got out. I love you, and I’m amazed by you.”

‘Got out’ he knew meant escaped Hydra’s grasp. You were right, he’d gone through quite the change since then.

“What’s that saying - ‘behind every strong man’..?” He started, raising an eyebrow at you to finish it.

“‘There’s probably a woman nagging him to make dinner for once’.”

Now this really makes him laugh. You watched as his nose scrunched and the crinkles in the corners of his eyes perk up. That’s the laugh you fell for.

“Okay you know for a fact that’s not it, doll. And, I’ll have you know, in the last few weeks I’ve been forced to learn how to cook better since the only other choice is starve.” He quipped, seemingly rather confident in his new found skillset.

“I’ll believe it when I see it.”

“Guess I’ll have to show you in person.”

“Yeah...” You muttered daftly as the mention of being with him again came to fruition once more.

“It’ll be amazing.” He said almost dreamily as he closed his eyes, thinking to himself about the ordeal of you being in his arms after so long. He craved you like nothing else.

“Don’t get too full of yourself,” You giggled, “A few months is hardly enough time to match my culinary ability-”

“I meant seein’ you again, baby.”

“Oh.”

Apparently ‘oh’ was the best answer you could come up with.

“Entertain me for a minute?” He asked you, cocking his head to the side with that signature lopsided smile of his. Bucky knew very well you could never say no to that, even if it was a topic you’d be entirely avoiding.

“Lay it on me, Romeo.” You rolled your eyes, but he knew you secretly wanted to hear what he would tell you just as much as he wanted to say it, even at the risk of bittersweetness.

“Whenever they lift the distancing rules, I don’t care what you’re doing, I don’t care what time it is, I don’t care where you are-”

“It’s a pretty safe bet I’ll be here.”

“Would you let me finish?” He chuckled playfully at your interjection.

You had a habit of seeing humour as an escape, and he knew that this was no exception. He was grateful. If you were joking around and being playful with him, at least it meant you weren’t crying anymore.

“Alright, alright.” You relented, opting to drink your tea and listen to him intently.

“My point is: the moment I’m able to see you again, I will run to you. If there’s a promise I know I can make to you, it’s that. You are my whole heart, doll. Nothing can change that, not distance, not a pandemic, not even your snoring-”

“I do not snore!”

“You absolutely do and I’m not done, you little punk.” He snorted before deciding it was time to leave all joking prods aside, “Baby, I love you. I love you so much that I go to sleep thinking about the next time I can see your pretty face, and I wake up with the same thing on my mind because you give me so much joy. I can’t wait to feel you in my atmosphere, and to hold you in my arms again, and to kiss you - god - doll, I miss kissing you more than anything in the world,”

Bucky had come a long way since you met him, yes, but he did still struggle with being emotive sometimes. Saying all of these things to you so directly was a huge deal for him. You knew better than anyone else that he must mean every single word.

“And the only reason I’m still sane is because I know that I’ll get the chance to soon. I don’t know when, but I know for sure that I will. I’ll wait for you, and you’ll wait for me... and that gives me the incentive I need to keep going everyday.” He offered you a sweet smile, which you returned immediately.

You sighed, entirely lovesick.

“You’re a wonder, James Barnes.”

“Oh, (Y/N)- The first name, really?” He couldn’t help but to laugh, even while fighting of a toe curling cringe.

“What? I haven’t seen you in ages - and you know it’s torture not being able to kiss you senseless after that display of your undying love for me - and you expect me not to lighten the mood?”

He watched you raise your mug to your lips, the lips he missed so dearly. There was a glint of mischeif in your eye, the one that made him fall in love with you in the first place.

“Honestly, I don’t know how I could’ve expected anything else.” He laughed, still trying his best to read your face to see if your absorbed what he was saying.

“It’s not easy for me to deal with indefinite timelines,” You admitted, looking at the wall of your bedroom in the distance, “But you know that already. I feel this torturous sense of longing for you in my bones, and knowing that it’s going to stay there for god knows how much longer...”

“I know, doll. Trust me, I know.” He told you.

“Uncertain reunion dates in the future aside, what I can say for sure is that I have the world’s kindest, bravest, most prolific altruist for a boyfriend, and knowing that you’re not only safe but offering yourself up for the sake of others like you are-” You stopped for a moment, desperately trying to not get choked up, “It gives me so much hope.”

When he heard that, he knew you’d gotten the message. It was about finding incentives that gave you hope, that allowed you happiness in moments of forlorn longing.

“Well, shucks.”

Bucky heard you snort in reply to his witticism. He closed his eyes and smiled, truely embracing what you’d said to him. All he ever wanted was to do right by the world; to give back to it. He’d gotten the biggest second chance in recorded history, and he’d be damned if he didn’t make the most of it. Knowing you not only saw the work he put in, but that you were proud of him for it? It made him absolutely melt.

“I’m incessantly in love with you and everything you are.” You said with no chastizing mention of his first name this time.

“I love you too, (Y/N). So much.”

You hummed for a moment, and Bucky tried to decipher if you were doing it out of contentment or if you were thinking.

“You miss kissing me, huh..?”

Thinking. It had definitely been thinking. And by the delish tone of your voice and look on your face Bucky saw when he opened his eyes, it was nothing all too innocent.

You circled the rim of your mug with your finger, drawing out your next words languidly and elicited a low groan from him.

“How about you tell me what else you miss, baby?”

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes imagine #mcu #marvel fanfiction #steve x reader #steve rogers x reader #winter soldier #winter soldier x reader

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onewaigu · 3 years

Text

I'm Sorry

Genre : Hogwarts!au

Theme : Angst

Pairing : Harin x N/A

Description : In the midst of a raging war, a boy who made all the wrong choices turned away from the chaos in search of a mirror that could reveal the deepest desire of a person's heart.

He knew very well that time was running out, yet he still ran as fast as his legs could take him for what felt like an eternity. Passing through almost every known corridor, he could finally feel shame and guilt creeping onto his heart as the stone walls around him stared at him accusingly.

He could hear them mocking him at the back of his head. Coward, there goes the coward.

The place he once called home was nothing but a fragment of old bittersweet memories. After all, he didn't belong there anymore.

He tried his best to drown out the curses that were being thrown about from behind him and ignore the hot searing pain that was coming from his left forearm. He wanted to be strong like how he dreamed of being when he was younger, even if it was only just for this short moment.

He kept running in search of a place that was hidden in plain sight, and as the chaos behind him began to grow fainter, he was sure that he was heading towards the right direction.

It was getting darker, he could barely see anything clearly anymore.

So with a whisper, he breathed out,

“Lumos”

From the tip of his wand, light illuminated the darkness around him, revealing a door a few steps in front of him which led to the very place that he was searching for this whole time.

With heavy yet hasty steps, he approached the dusty wooden door. As far as he knew, it had been awhile since the place was last visited by anyone, and it was evident just by looking at the rusty lock on the door.

Pointing his wand at the lock, he casted a non-verbal unlocking charm. Click.

The door creaked open as he placed his hand on it, giving it a gentle push. What he saw in front of him was an empty classroom, or so most people would think and not give a second thought about it.

This was the place where you could find the most desperate desire of a person's heart by looking back into your own pitiful reflection.

This was where the Mirror of Erised was kept.

Taking in a deep breath, he closed his eyes and let his legs take him to where the mirror stood. As he was walking, his mind turned into a sea of memories. An overwhelming wave of regret washed over him as each memory floated around like a lost boat with a broken compass.

Once his footsteps came to a stop, it meant that the mirror was in front of him and that he could finally open his eyes but he hesitated. He had a feeling that what he would be seeing would crush him inside and he was scared. He was terrified.

However again, time wasn't on his side so whether he liked it or not, he had to face the mirror. With that, he opened his eyes.

He saw himself.

He saw a boy who was lost, a boy who had made all the wrong decisions, a boy who broke too many promises.

His physical appearance wasn't any better. His raven-coloured hair almost looked completely gray due to the dust and debris that had fallen around him, his clothes were all tattered and torn, and his once flawless face was covered with scars and dried up blood. All evidence of the battle that was raging outside.

Pulling away from his own reflection, he noticed that he was no longer alone in the mirror as four pairs of eyes were staring back at his own.

They belonged to his-

No, he couldn't possibly call them his friends now, could he? After everything he had done to them?

As his vision began to cloud with tears, he heard someone calling his name.

“Harin-hyung, why the long face? I thought you promised we were going to play a game of jelly bean roulette at the dorms later?”, said Giwook with a pout.

Harin hurriedly wiped his tears away with his sleeve and shifted his eyes to the image of the young metamorphmagus who was struggling to carry his sweets in his arms.

“I already bought 5 packs of Bertie Bott's during the last Hogsmeade trip! We're definitely not going to sleep tonight”, Giwook playfully bumped his rainbow-coloured head into Harin's back.

Even though he was well-aware that that wasn't the real Giwook, Harin still reached out his left hand to touch the spot where Giwook's image had previously bumped into his reflection's back. The feeling of melancholy enveloped his heart.

He couldn't take it anymore so he teared his gaze away from the younger boy but unfortunately as he did so, another person spoke.

“Woah, what's with the tears? Don't tell me you already watched the muggle movie without me!”

Not him. Why did it have to be him?

“Harin-ah, did you know I even borrowed this muggle contraption from the Muggle Studies Professor just for us to watch the movie? We just have to insert the round disk you found into this slot, and apparently images will start moving on its own, just like The Daily Prophet but with sounds! Aren't muggle wonders fascinating?”, Yonghoon-hyung exclaimed in excitement.

Harin surprised himself when he let out a chuckle at his hyung's rambling. But as soon as he realised what he did, his face instantly hardened.

How could he be happy when it was him who made his hyung suffer in the first place?

Frustrated at his hopeless stupidity, he curled his fingers into a fist and knocked hard on the mirror.

Fortunately, it didn't break but it did cause another person to speak up and that person was none other than-

“Hyungu..”, Harin's voice trembled under his breath.

“So I was thinking, maybe we could drop by Zonko's during the next hogsmeade trip? Mum owled me a pouch full of galleons for my birthday, can you believe it! Said it was better for me to pick out my own present but I bet she's just too lazy to go to Diagon Alley to go find one”, joked Hyungu who had his arm slung around Harin's shoulders in the mirror.

Kang Hyungu, was the first friend he ever made at Hogwarts. The story behind how they met was simple but sweet as the two had shared a compartment on the train and before any words were ever exchanged, chocolate frogs and pumpkin pasties were being passed back and forth between them first. From then on, they stuck by each other's side even though they were separated by their respective houses. They didn't let any house prejudice turn them against each other.

Their friendship ran deep. That is, until someone broke that trust. Harin could still picture the absolute horror and hurt he saw in his Hyungu's eyes when he did what he did. Not a day went by without him regretting everything that took place.

Harin let out a sigh. As much as he wanted this suffering to end, there was still one person left.

“Hi hyung, we missed you”, and upon hearing those soft gentle words, Harin's guilt began to overwhelm him. He tried to ignore the pain for as long as he could but it was getting unbearable.

Eventually, he crumpled to the ground and broke down into sobs. His hands were covering his face out of shame. His whole body was shaking.

“Harin-hyung, please don't cry”, the voice cooed.

“Dongmyeong-ah, I'm sorry, Hyung is really really sorry”, Harin managed to choke out.

“What are you sorry about? You didn't do anything wrong”, Dongmyeong smiled reassuringly. The sweetness from the younger boy's voice felt like honey to his ears.

It crushed his heart even more when he raised his head and saw that all four images of his old friends had crowded on the floor around his reflection and were looking at him in worry.

Harin knew exactly what he was doing when he left the battle to find the Mirror of Erised. He knew that they were going to lose and betraying them now would not be the best option. All he wanted was his last moments to be with the people he loved dearly and the mirror was the only way.

His friends were his deepest desire.

And..he truly missed them.

[a/n]

it's been awhile since i last wrote something hehe, onewe's recent comeback was beyond my imagination and when the mv finally dropped, i just had to write something harry potter related because of all the beautiful aesthetics > < hope you enjoy!

stan onewe~

#onewe #oneweangst #oneweau #oneweoneshot #juharin #oneweharin #harinangst #harinau #harinfic #oneweve #weve

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