#listen. sometimes its okay to be mean. if someone tells you to kill yourself I dont think its appropriate to give them patience and kindnes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

electricbluebutterflies · 8 months

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Prompt: “ it's nothing. hurts like hell but -- i've dealt with worse. “

Post-s2-grayspace Kabby. We're playing a little loose with medical plausibility but I did twist my ankle as a tiny human (roughly 20 years ago) so I'm just going with that memory and hoping it's close enough. PG-ish and also on ao3.

If nothing else on this planet manages to kill him, she just might.

This is not a new emotion or desire for Abby – if anything, its frequency has lessened. But other details have changed too, the dramatic personality shift she’s trying to make her peace with and worries was somehow her fault, and-

Most of said personality shift makes her life easier. The fact that Marcus is now impulsive and a bit passive-aggressively suicidal undoes all that goodwill real fast when it flares.

She is not trying to take up his former mantle of paranoia, but it seems that every time he leaves the safety of their compound for more than about two hours, regardless of whether he’s alone or with others, something goes wrong and it becomes her problem. Injuries happen, she gets it, there’s a whole new world everyone is trying to get used to, but most people don’t…

She of all people understands the unwillingness to accept new physical limitations, but it’s like he’s not even trying, like he can ignore that damage and be okay, and then that doesn’t work and she gets stuck dealing with the damage. Just like always.

This time, he thinks he can hide it – he’s learning, perhaps, that these little adventures are becoming the only times she lets herself get mad at him. This time, he comes back moving just slightly wrong, just wrong enough that only someone who pays too much attention to his habits would notice a change, and-

“With me,” she says, and she will at least give him the mercy of not going at him with an audience, as much as that would probably be the most interesting part of five different people’s days. “Now.”

Perfect compliance – this too is becoming normal, this new and frightful willingness to actually listen to her that was absolutely not present six months ago and they’d all be a lot less fucked if it had been and this is no time for what-ifs and-

“I can’t imagine I missed anything that vital in less than half a day,” he says once they’re behind a closed door, not quite making eye contact and clearly trying to distract her. She forgets sometimes that he knows her habits just as well, and hers haven’t dramatically changed recently so that’s even easier, and-

“You are at least aware where you are right now,” she mutters, almost a question. “Turn your head for five minutes and someone tries to cause the apocalypse by accident, again.”

“I know you have more important things to do than-“

“Sit down and shut up for long enough for me to-“

“It’s nothing,” he says in that avoidant voice that used to mean something entirely different between them. “Hurts like hell, but… I’ve dealt with worse.”

Goddamn right he has, Abby thinks and won’t say. At least there’s nothing visibly wrong, at least-

“Make this easier for yourself and tell me what happened before I start removing your clothes until I find it.”

Apparently that’s the necessary level of directness today. Marcus leans down and undoes one of his boots, and… yep, ankle just slightly swollen, sizeable bruise, that’d explain the movement issues, that’d also explain-

“And what exactly did you do?”

“Ground looked level. It wasn’t.”

She kneels down and gets her fingers on the injury, feeling the damage. At least he didn’t manage to break anything, probably just a twist, still unpleasant but not-

“I’m going to wrap that,” she murmurs. “You need to rest it for a few days. I don’t care if-“

“I’m fine. I can’t-“

Abby leans up and glares at him with every bit of fury she can put into her facial expression. “Do you see yourself right now? Do you see these colors that human skin isn’t supposed to-“

“Fine,” he repeats.

“You are supposed to be my other half here. And that means it ruins my life if you go out and hurt yourself any further because of stupid masculine bravado or your barely concealed death wish or-“

“I don’t rest well. You of all people know that.”

Yes, she thinks, the number of times she had to physically tackle him despite being in more pain herself because their combined recovery situation was designed more for supervision than actual enforced healing sure was a time, she’s amazed that even worked, and-

“But I’m the only person left you’ll listen to,” she counters. “And I’m not saying bedrest – I’d like to, but I know you. I’m saying for the next three days your world consists of your normal indoor haunts and ideally not a lot of movement between them, understand?”

It’s not the compromise she wants to make, but she knows how far she can push. And if he spends most of his waking hours on the couch in their shared office, that means she can supervise him and make sure…

Oh, nevermind. Trying to save that man from himself is always a losing battle. She’s known that since she was fifteen. Decades later, she still tries anyways.

“Stay where you can see me,” he correctly interprets. “Understood.”

She moves away for long enough to find an adequate bandage and wraps it around his ankle as tight as she can, just enough structure to control further damage. He’s lucky he didn’t manage to do worse to himself, but it’s probably only a matter of time before-

She’s never actually considered the possibility of her life without him. She doesn’t like that thought.

“There. Is that…”

“I’ll deal.”

It’s not the answer she necessarily wants, but it’ll do. This is no time to actually voice her worry, and-

“I need you,” she repeats anyways.

“Understood.”

#ebf writes fic #kabby #queue

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faeriescorpio · 1 year

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It Wouldn’t Make A Difference

ao3:https://archiveofourown.org/works/45856459

tw: character talks a lot about suicide and kinda does it at the end in an implied sense but its In Space With markiplier so dying doesnt mean dying

Summary: The Captain gets a little too cavalier with killing themselves to move on to new universes. Mack gets a bit of a scare.

-------------------------

It's a quiet night. Well, all nights are quiet in space.

You sway to music that even you can't hear, arms out and dancing to an invisible partner.

You're getting kind of tired of this loop. Mark's not here this time, it's Mack. You've had him as your Head Engineer before. This time, you were a on top of it, activating protocols to help the ship instead of opening his pod so that by the time he stepped out of the pod, you had done everything but wake the crew leads. Mack rushed to take action, to take control, of course, but by then you had already placed yourself in a position where you had proven your worth. He couldn't take over so easily, and it left him visibly fuming.

He was likely to find some way to take control by the time you were up tomorrow. You spun your nonexistent partner, catching a blurred glimpse of the glass of the control room that led out to the beautiful stars.

You think that maybe tomorrow morning when you step out of your cryo pod, instead of listening to Mack, you'll just throw the fire hydrant into the window. A quick death that will let you move on in the right direction toward your real head engineer.

"Captain?" You turn to find your head engineer watching you from the hallway, confused.

You thought he was in his cryo pod. Oh well. You suppose it makes sense that he'd be awake. He needs time to start scheming how to take control, doesn't he?

You keep dancing to your nonexistent song. You sway to no tune. There is nothing in your head. It's more like practicing dancing steps than any real moves.

"Captain," Mack says, strangled. "What are you doing?" There's no such thing as embarrassment when no one remembers your actions but you. Still, something drives you to at least acknowledge him.

"Dancing." Impulsively, you turn and reach out a hand. "Care to join? It's not like you'll remember."

"What?" He steps closer despite himself. "What are you talking about?"

"It's okay to dance with me," You repeat. "No one will see. It wouldn't interfere with your plans to take over." Mack makes a startled noise, no doubt surprised that you know about his plans. "Oh shush. As I said. it doesn't matter. You won't remember any of this."

"Why wouldn't I remember this tomorrow morning?"

"Because I'll kill myself," You explain, and the blood drains from his face, and he stares at you. "Then I'll go off to another universe, no doubt one where Mark is head engineer."

"Mark?" Mack looks pale. "Who- who is-"

"None of that." You grab his hand and pull him closer to you.

"Captain!" Mack yanks himself out of your grasp. "Explain yourself!"

Fine. So you tell him some of it. You don't make the mistake of mentioning Mark again, though. You're not quite ready for this universe to break and send you away yet. "The warp core is malfunctioning, and it's going to destroy every universe if I don't stop it. This-" You gesture to the warp crystal in the palm of your hand, and Mack leans forward to see it- "allows me to travel across the universes to try and find the warp core. Sometimes I switch universes randomly, but if I die it always takes me to a new universe."

Mack looks at you, a glimmer of fear in his eyes. "So you've just been killing yourself? Over and over?"

You shrug. "Sometimes it's faster than waiting for the portals to appear."

He grabs you. "Captain," He says, voice low and desperate. "I know that cryo sleep can cause strange dreams, but you can't kill yourself."

You ignore the first part of the statement. It's not the first time someone hasn't believed you, and it won't be the last.

"You need a scapegoat that badly? No thank you." You pull out a small knife you obtained from the murderer version of Mark you met. "It's quite easy. Injuries don't follow me into the next universe. Blood doesn't stay on my clothes. I just-" You raise the knife and Mack smacks it out of your hand.

"No!" He shouts. The knife clatters across the control room floor noisily. It's the loudest thing around.

You follow it with your eyes, and Mack steps in front of your gaze, staring at you intently.

"Captain, please," He says, voice rough, and you look at him. He's sweating, and scared. You don't understand.

"What?" You demand, and he grabs both your hands.

"Please don't kill yourself," he begs. "You- I-" He swallows. "You mean a lot. To- uh. To the crew!"

"To the crew." You say flatly. Sometimes it's true, you suppose. Sometimes the crew remembers what you've done, and they eye you with respect and awe. You're saving the universe. The last time Mack was head engineer, they watched you with hatred. They remembered all the wrong things. You have a certain confidence to you that when you fix everything, they won't remember it at all. Which is good, you suppose. You've been acting a bit like a fool lately.

"To me," Mack amends, and you turn your attention to him, surprised that he would admit it.

"You care about me?" You ask, disbelieving, and he steps closer and instead of saying anything else, he begins to dance with you, following the steps you had been taking with your imaginary partner. How long had he been watching?

It doesn't matter. He won't remember. You dance with him until your feet hurt, and then you keep dancing. Pain isn't real to you anymore. But Mack looks more and more discomforted as you continue, and you think of the fairy tale where people danced until they died. You slow to a stop, then put your hands around his waist.

"What are you doing?!" He yelps as you lift him up and set him down on the main monitor.

"Rest your feet," You reply, and Mack stares at you for a long moment.

"You... you don't feel a thing, do you." His voice sounds miserable.

"No," You confirm. He looks more upset.

"Please don't kill yourself, Captain. You mean a lot to me." Some part of him sounds resigned.

"I can't stay in this universe." Mack hangs his head down, and you almost feel bad. In the dim lighting, with the sweaty shine in his hair, he doesn't look too bad. He looks rather handsome, you admit to yourself.

Eventually, he slides off of the monitor.

"I won't remember any of this?" He asks quietly, and you nod. You're not sure if he actually believes you.

He steps forward anyway. "So I won't remember this." He brings his face closer to yours, hands moving up to cradle your face. His lips meet yours.

He's surprisingly gentle for someone who's going to become a dictator in the near future.

Your eyes flutter shut as the kiss deepens. Eventually, you pull away. Some part of you is disappointed. It might be the most amount of emotion you've felt in quite a while that wasn't a tired determination.

Mack stares at you some more, as if he's trying to commit you to memory. It won't work but you let him try.

"I better see you in the morning, Captain. That's an order," He says, and he steps into his cryo pod. You nod your head and turn to your pod. You don't hear him close his door until you've started to step inside your cryo pod. He must've been waiting. It doesn't matter. The moment you hear his pod close, you step back out of yours and pick up your knife.

You raise your knife.

You were originally going to end this loop early to avoid Mack hurting your feelings.

You're doing it now to spare his.

You've never given thought as to whether you leave some sort of body behind when you switch universes. You're pretty sure you don't.

You pray you don't.

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inpursuitofmeaning · 2 months

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March 30, 2024

To err is human, and today, rather unfortunately, I was very much a human (womp womp). I made a mistake. I didn't kill anyone or anything like that. In fact, it hardly has any consequences other than my own guilt, which is deserving. I called out a stranger (an employee of the karting event) on their passive aggressive comment. I didn't yell or swear or hurl insults, and tried my best to say calm, as I explained that I am more than happy to listen if I am doing something wrong, but I didn't appreciate her passive aggressive tone. I immediately felt guilty, because although I tried to stay calm, I still felt like I re-acted, instead of responding, and didn't think before I spoke. Looking back, I am probably recalling the memory with heightened adrenalin (from the race), and a human bias, making me think maybe she wasn't being passive aggressive, and rather it was me projecting my own insecurities, defensiveness, embarrassment (from spinning out) and therefore my ego. Recognizing this, I do feel rather bad about it. I brought it up after the race, and she tried to dismiss the conflict, to which I persisted. This I feel particularly bad about, so I sent an email to the karting place (in French) to try and apologize for my behaviour. Marcus Aurelius tells us the following...

"How rediculous and how strange to be surprised at anything which happens in life"

“When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly. They are like this because they can't tell good from evil. But I have seen the beauty of good, and the ugliness of evil, and have recognized that the wrongdoer has a nature related to my own - not of the same blood and birth, but the same mind, and possessing a share of the divine. And so none of them can hurt me. No one can implicate me in ugliness. Nor can I feel angry at my relative, or hate him. We were born to work together like feet, hands and eyes, like the two rows of teeth, upper and lower. To obstruct each other is unnatural. To feel anger at someone, to turn your back on him: these are unnatural.”

I must look as this mistake as an opportunity to grow. And reflecting on it made me realize several things about myself

I recalled I was also being defensive this morning with my partner over a small mistake. I realized that I have a tendency to get so defensive and insecure over the smallest, insignificant things. Well, I have discovered I have a bit of an obsession with having a perfect moral slate. I was raised in an environment where "being good" was what gave me my value as a human. So when I make mistakes, it is a compromise of my entire sense of self and belief system. I have been aware of this for a while, and find my reaction and ability tpo deal with small mistakes cyclical, and heavyly depenandt on my external environment. Sometimes I can forgive myself, other times not. And I find it heavily depends on who the mistake affects (affects others = I think im the devil, affects me = I can deal with the consequences)

We are human, and I will make mistakes. Life is is full of mistakes. What matters is my ability to look at it with gratitude. I made this mistake now, so that I don't make it again, when im older, and potentially in a more significant situation. Of course I still feel bad about the way I spoke to this girl. I am not a conflictive or antagonistic person, and I find I struggle to find balance between when to defend myself, and when to let it go. I was a pushover for so long, that any form of conflict makes me highly uncomfortable. Even working retail, I dont know if it helped or hindered my conflict skills, as it filled me with so much fear for people. During the conflict, this girl just said its okay it dint bother me, the kart hurt my leg I understand, I are all good let us forget" and I said "well, I understand and im sorry I dint mean to hurt your leg, but your tone was passive aggressive and I didnt appreciate it". To which she responded "I understand". Why couldn't I have just understood in the moment? Isn't that the most human thing of all? To understand? Isn't that what we all want? I could learn something from that. She handled it much better than I did. And why does THAT embarrass me? Why do I think I should be able to handle it better (better than her, better than I did??)- because I read philosophy and think alot? that does not make me a good person, just like being good at things doesnt make me a good person (re: first bullet). Why am I embarrassed - it is my ego again.

“Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.” I feel better after sending the email. Even though I know I can't change the past, at least I can learn from this mistake, become wiser, and not do it again.

“When you start to lose your temper, remember: There’s nothing manly about rage. It’s courtesy and kindness that define a human being—and a man. That’s who possesses strength and nerves and guts, not the angry whiners. To react like that brings you closer to impassivity—and so to strength. Pain is the opposite of strength, and so is anger. Both are things we suffer from, and yield to.” To err is human, and (rather unfortunately) am a human.

#nothing new #the life and times of emily #not my proudest moment

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bakuvantea · 3 years

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HEY BESTIE I HOPE YOUR HAVING AN AMAZING DAY

CAN I GET SOME GENERAL HEADCANONS WITH SUNG JIN-WOO WITH A FEMALE S/O

FEEL FREE TO IGNORE BUT REMEMBER TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF

>:)

general relationship headcanons of sung jin-woo with his beloved s/o

- warnings: none! just a tad bit of nsfw implications

- audience: I made this gender neutral, i do hope that’s okay!!

- a/n: hello >:) anonnn (may i call u that? lmao-) here’s your request love!! thank you for your kind words <33 stay heathy, stay hydrated, and always rest up okay? hope you have an amazing day ahead too!!

also idk who jacob is-

-•-

: pre-awakened jin-woo (before entering the carthenon temple)

> he was always cautious, he didn't want [you] to hear the whispers going around about how you could've chosen someone better, about how you could've loved someone that was not him. thus, he was very shy and timid, always on edge when he feels the piercing stares from his batchmates -most especially when you try to initiate physical contact with him in your school or in public, you'd see him uncomfortable and so you'd immediately stop (because you respect him, ily). behind closed doors though he would always go above and beyond in pleasing you and making you feel loved, although he always doubts himself so you always make sure to give him praises and assure him that he is the one you love (not that jerk jacob from the class next door).

> he always wears spare hair ties or hair pins around his wrists in case you forget or lose yours. in fact when its weekends -and when he's not out infiltrating dungeons and positively offering his life on a silver platter- he always tries to study new hairdos and hairstyles so he can have more variations and choices when he ties or pins your hair for you. he'd always kiss the top of your head after and you'd feel his smile as he nuzzles your hair, smelling your shampoo. since his hair is also long, you'd also return the favor and tie his hair for him. his favorite would have to be the classic apple look with a pointy lock of hair erect in the middle -he really looks like a shih tzu, adorable-

> he.blushes.so.easily !!! he is very weak to praises and your lil kisses that pepper his face. you can see him glow and you even see his smile evidently becoming wider despite him shying away from you, looking downwards to avoid your loving gaze.

> he may be sht but he is also very playful towards you, teasing you and throwing pillows at you when you’re in his room, what a baby.

> often during dates he'd always need to leave early because he really needs to earn money and g to the dungeons. although you try to offer him some of your savings or your help during the dungeon raids, he'd always reject your offer, thinking of how it may burden you or the dungeon raids may possibly hurt you. you don't listen to him though, you give some of your savings to his sister when you cross paths in your school, and you'd always register after him in raids or call up someone you know to have you join in.

"(name) why are you here?!"

"angel face, i can handle myself just fine. it's my choice to help you and whether you like it or not, i've also been called for this raid. come love, we're going in."

> you'd always take his blue hoodie and wear it. he gets so shy when you smell it.

he gets frantic when you take his hoodie and start sniffing it, exclaiming; "stop! i smell weird."

you raise an eyebrow at him, "woo, you smell fine. i like it."

he tries to stutter a remark but was silenced by your smile.

> you always try to visit his mother with him and his sister, jinah. you always talk to their mother out loud and you'd see jinah smile gently at you and jin-woo trying to stop sniffles from escaping his lips by biting them and covering his face with his hoodie.

jinah: u simp

jin-woo: shut it

> he loved cuddles! but he really likes kissing your cheeks. he loves how soft they are and he loves feeling your cheeks move when you smile or laugh at his cute antics.

> he loves you so so dear

: post-awakened jin-woo (after the events of the carthenon temple)

> oh, dear it's the monarch-

> you weren't with him when he raided the "d-rank" dungeon that then turned out to be,, well pretty much a bloodbath, so you were very worried when you heard word of the news. you and jinah basically ran to the hospital and when you caught sight of him you almost fell down from relief and pure shock in seeing the state he's in. well, not long after though suddenly he's all buff and you were really trying to make sense of what's happening.

you: hello there good sir, what in the name of fck are you doing in my boyfriend’s room all sweaty and half-naked😀

jin-woo: (name) it’s me

you: haha yes, sir ‘it’s me’ that’s a pretty weird name but i don't judge, anyways my baby boy is not here uhm haha please get out of my boyfriend’s room

jin-woo: (name) it’s really me!

you: no sir, my woo radiates baby energy, you on the other hand radiates big dilf energy, haha i do not like what i am sensing so please for the life of me leave-

(jinah had to convince you that it is indeed jin-woo, you had her stop you from trying to hold his tiddies)

> you were very happy in seeing how confident he’s become, and you were even more proud with how he still says so humble despite his new accomplishments and title.

> it was obvious that he has become distant with others and have set a boundary between him and other hunters, you accept that part of him though since you know just how much he has gone through. he may act aloof towards others but he’s still very playful and comfortable with you.

> you have also noticed another thing though, he has become a bit possessive or much protective over you and jinah. he’d always have you bring a shadow with you to guard you when he can’t be with you. also, when someone stares at you for far too long, he’d step in and go, “hey there pal” and oh gosh was that enough to get the guy running (pretty damn hot)

> you still visit his mom with him, he doesn’t cry now though.

> when he trains, you’d insist on lying down below him when he does push-ups. you’d kiss him every time he swoops down and you’d hear him laugh which then makes you giggle as you hold his cheeks between your hands

> jinah is sick of the two you, always screaming about how on earth did her brother get an s/o before her, the audacity!

> his shadows adore you, of they’d always try to impress you or get head pats when you tell jin-woo to summon them for you. you live them to bits and always thanks them for a job well done in helping jin-woo with his raids. on the first time you accompanied him for a raid -you had to bribe him with more cuddles- and you were shocked with how his sweet adorable shadows turned a full 180, becoming ruthless towards the enemies. quite a show you’d say. after though, they’re back to flocking over you, even dismissing jin-woo lmao

jin-woo, watching you give each shadows head pats: i hate it here

you: get in line then

> it may be due to his newly acquired talents and his current mental and physical prowess but he has become more perceptive towards you. he can always read you and know just what your mood is and he always tries to make you feel better by giving his whole attention to you.

> of but of course, since dear jin-woo has become quite the looker, you also notice how girls flock over to him. and especially miss hae-in (she’s very sweet yes, but hey that’s your man so like—). the moment you discovered that she left her guild to join jin-woo’s, and then confessed (well basically she did) to your man, well you were upset but really who could blame her? instead of taking your frustrations out on her and your boyfriend, you decided to just talk it out with jin-woo and ask him about how it went. the two of you cleared it out and you got kisses and maybe even more after that ;))

> you and jin-ho are menaces to society when you are together, he hates how endearing and annoying you two can be. i mean, does he really hate it? nope, he absolutely loves seeing you two interact, although his head always throbs when you two start screaming to britney, gaga, and doja.

> a tease, he has become the master of being a tease, you hate it and love it at the same time. he’d trail kisses down your neck to your thighs and leave some marks then he’d suddenly walk away while asking you what take-out you want. rude, that’s what he is. ofc he always finished what he starts tho oop-

> he always randomly bites you now, you don’t know why but it’s really cute when he starts nibbling so you let him be.

> so extra when he tells you that he loves you. he professes it in such weird but adorable ways. one time he had printed out ‘i love you so much’ on a big-ass tarpaulin and had his shadows hold it for him while he’s kneeling down smoldering at you. you hate him so much (you don’t-). or that one time he bought a bouquet basket and had a ring tied to one of the flowers, you had to take the bouquet apart since the damn ring fell to the very bottom.

> sometimes when he gets back to the agency after his dungeon raids you and jin-ho would see him all grumpy and you immediately know that either he wasn’t able to make the enemy his soldier or his coat got ruined.

jin-woo: *sad noises*

jin-ho: that’s okay, you can kill and slaughter the others and take their souls next time

you: jin-ho couldn’t you have worded that better-

over-all, he’s the bestest boyfriend, such a sweet and handsome pretty boy much strong and reliable we love him<333

-•-

- a/n: i can add more to this if you’d like!! just hit me up again lmao it’s too long now so-

#sung jin woo x reader #sung jin woo #solo leveling #solo leveling x reader #manhwa #jin woo #jinwoo #sung jinwoo #winamikobabbles #sung jinwoo x reader

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versadies · 3 years

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Hello!! I just read your Zhongli and Xiao poly headcannons and its just 🤌💖💖💖

I was wondering if youre willing to do Zhongli and Childe poly with a GN! reader perhaps? ;;w;; Maybe how they managed to pull reader into that wild mess haha

But regardless keep up the good work!!~ 💖

penpal: aww thank u so much, im glad you like my poly hc on xiao and zhongli! and can i just say omg what an even more chaotic pair 😳😳😳

warning/s: spoilers on archon quest (chapter one) and childe’s story quest, reader has a role (adventurer), not proof-read, wearing, and ooc (?)

when you suggest a poly relationship:

-> it was hilarious when you three didn’t date yet.

-> listen, childe would literally be in a one-sided rivalry with zhongli— who isn’t even aware of this rivalry.

-> i honestly can see you and zhongli being friends for quite a while and he wouldn’t realize his feelings until childe comes in the picture and tries to woo you.

-> zhongli would have a hard time trying to figure out his feelings for you while childe is busy flirting with you. you’ll either be (or try to act) obvlivious or think childe’s flirting is just harmless flirting with no meaning to it.

-> basically, your pre-relationship is just complicated and full of misunderstandings.

-> once zhongli actually figures out his feelings, he’ll try to learn more on romance given that he’s very inexperienced with it and will plan on confessing his feelings to you.

-> when childe actually finds out about zhongli trying to confess to you— he’ll literally do so many things to make zhongli not try to confront you such as distracting you, have the wangsheng funeral parlor keep him busy, etc.

-> you’d caught on to childe’s scheming so you have to go confront zhongli yourself.

-> for some reason though— it ended up with both of them confessing you on the spot and let you choose who to be with in this scenario.

-> which resulted in you suggesting a poly relationship

when they’re the one who suggest it:

-> childe and zhongli have a... unique relationship per say.

-> in this scenario, i honestly see childe still being in a one-sided rivalry with zhongli when it comes to winning your heart.

-> for zhongli, he’s still unsure of his feelings but he’ll figure out later on that he wants to be more than just friends with you.

-> he’ll actually notice on how childe is starting to be more.. affectionate with you and just shrug it off as harmless. however, zhongli will start to notice how childe’s flirting has a hint of desperation and seriousness.

-> once childe finds out that zhongli is in love with you too, he’ll not do the same thing that he did in the scenario above— instead, he’ll actually confront zhongli about it.

-> i can actually see childe suggesting a fight and the person who wins will confess to you— but he knows it’s no use. he knows what zhongli is capable of given that he’s rex lapis, the previous god of war and the fact that childe is still recovering from using his legacy form in the teucer incident makes him know that the fight won’t end well.

-> i honestly think childe would make a “contract” with zhongli in confessing to you at the same time and if you don’t choose the other, they have to back off. obviously, zhongli would accept the contract given that he’s the god of contracts and all.

-> so this led to them confessing you in one of the best destination spots of liyue.

-> if you admit that you don’t actually know who to choose, then zhongli would suggest in trying out a poly relationship.

-> i honestly think childe would be against a poly relationship with you and zhongli since he immediately thinks of how chaotic it would be— but if you accept in trying, then childe might as well accept.

what it’s like to be in a poly rel. with them:

-> at first, it was a bit... awkward. neither of y’all don’t know what to do with the relationship but after a while, the three of you would went with the flow.

-> as i mentioned in my prev headcanons that has zhongli, he is inexperienced in dating and affection. he’s stiff when you give him hugs and kisses at first. however, after learning from childe, he would start holding your hand or give you forehead kisses (with permission ofc, this is zhongli we’re talking about).

-> childe is probably the most open when it comes to affection. he’ll always give you a hug or kiss whenever you’re around. he’ll even hug you and zhongli together if he’s in a happy mood.

-> while childe is the most open, zhongli is the most caring. if one of y’all have a hard time sleeping, he’ll get out from bed and make tea that helps you sleep. he’ll also make sure you and childe have eaten well and will happily try to take care of your injuries.

-> when it comes to dates— it’s laidback and partially adventurous. most of your dates always takes place in wanmin restaurant but on special occassions, it’s somewhere out from liyue harbor.

-> as for the public, neither of you really care if the whole nation heard winds of your relationship. childe would most likely prefer to keep his relationship with you and zhongli a secret given that he’s a part of the fatui.

-> speaking of fatui...

-> childe will not tell you anything about the fatui at all. zhongli may have dealt with the fatui as well but that does not mean he’ll tell you what he knows as well (not after a secret contract childe made with him during your first days of your relationship).

-> childe’s reason is that he does not want you to see his.. scary side. even though you know his potential along with the fatui’s, he never tells you his lust for battles. whenever you go on adventures with him, he’ll literally keep his insane addiction to fighting in stability in fear of making you run away from him and never talk to him.

-> he knows you would never be afraid fo him, yet he couldn’t help but just keep this side a secret just in case.

-> fights with them are seldom. the only fights you’ve fought is with childe and zhongli would be the peacemaker between you two. most of your arguments were about how careless the both of you are when it comes to adventuring or fighting enemies. thankfully none of the fights is very serious— just you and childe lecturing (angrily) back to back.

-> whenever you’re sad, they’ll do whatever they can to make you happy. whether it’d be childe making his wallet crying by buying your favorite foods and things, zhongli giving you the best hugs, or both taking you to a place with a comforting atmosphere.

-> whoever made you sad needs to run because they will get their ass kicked by a god and one of the most feared people in the fatui.

-> when it comes to joining you on your adventures, childe will be very happy to kill every single enemy by your side while zhongli would make sure the both of you are protected with his shields.

-> picnic dates picnic dates picnic dates—

-> the three of you are the literal definition of teamwork when it comes to adventuring around teyvat. your team is the kind that all adventurers want.

-> if you get hurt— oof rip to the enemy who hurt you because that’s the last time they’ll ever do before a hugeass whale and a fucking meteor crashed down on the enemy.

-> if one of them got hurt— oof rip to the enemy because they’ll get their ass kicked by an angry adventurer who just wanted to spend time with their boyfriends.

-> when it comes to being jealous, it’s childe who mostly gets jealous. if it weren’t for zhongli, childe would’ve ruined a lot of careers. he’s actually fine if someone flirts with you cuz hey, you’re hot and who knows, maybe the person will offer you a free drink!

-> however, should the person make you uncomfortable, childe’s carefree attitude went 0 and won’t hesitate to try to break the person’s arm if they won’t leave you alone. please pray that zhongli has childe’s back and won’t get you all in trouble for childe breaking someone’s bones.

-> one of the cons of your relationship with these two is they’re busy.

-> i honestly think that childe would be distant. since the fatui got what they wanted from zhongli, he’ll need to be sent back to snezhnaya for another task. he’ll def write letters to you and zhongli and send them every week— even if he’s too busy, he’ll find time to write them just so you two know he’s okay.

-> on regular days, it’ll just be you and zhongli— but then again, there were some days when zhongli would be busy as well due to his job. don’t worry, he’ll be with you by the end of the day and make up for his super busy schedule with cuddles and stories you’ve never heard of!

-> despite them being busy, they’ll actually try everything they can to speed things up just so they can go back to you. if childe has the chance, he would take you and zhongli to snezhnaya and meet his family while he’s doing harbringer works there— hell, he’ll even quit his harbringer work and join your adventure team if he could.

-> of course, as an adventurer— you are also busy with your commissions.

-> sometimes, you’d be gone for the whole day and come back home the next day. it’s not something these two aren’t used to but they do tend to worry whenever you’re gone for more than 2 days.

-> they’ll definitely be more clingy or affectionate when you go back to them from a long trip.

-> every time childe announces in his letters that he’ll go back to liyue, you and zhongli will immediately go visit to the docks and wait for a snezhnayan ship to appear. childe will literally be knocked out from you tackling him with a hug the moment he comes out from the ship.

-> after that sweet reunite, you and zhongli will definitely take him to wanmin restaurant and talk about what you two did while he was gone. childe will also make sure no fatui agent won’t bother you three when times like this happens

-> time is very precious in your relationship. you three really don’t get to be together everyday but whenever you can, you cherish your time.

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beels-burger-babe · 3 years

Text

Melodious Mourning

***Ben Platt?! Hell yes! Okay! I am so so excited about this! Thank you so much @ester-is-here for reminding me how much I love this song. I hope everyone enjoys it. You can listen to the song, if you haven't already, here. Disclaimer: In Case You Don't Live Forever and its lyrics do not belong to me. They belong to the brilliant Ben Platt*** Poly!MC Summary: It's MC's anniversary of their relationship with the Lords of the Devildom. They've planned a little something special to share with them; something that will express how much they love the brothers, while also preparing them for a tragic truth. The time had come. After a long night of celebrating your anniversary with the seven sins, it was time for you to finally show them the surprise you had prepared for them. You giggled as you dragged a tired Belphegor into the music room by his hand, the others following closely behind you. Asmodeus made a small noise of disappointment and leaned against the grand piano in the middle of the room. "You know when you said you had a surprise for us, I must admit this wasn't exactly what I had in mind, " you snorted as Satan smacked Asmo on the back of the head. Asmo yelped and held his head as he glared at Satan. "Though I'm sure that whatever this surprise it will be equally as lovely. Geez, let me finish before you ruin my hair!" Mammon came up beside you. "But what is this surprise though? Is it a diamond? Money? Jewelry? That lost treasure that we never found?" You smiled softly at the Avatar of Greed and poked his nose. "It's better than that. Or at least I hope it will be," You sat down at the piano and took some sheet music out of your bag. "I um...I wanted to sing a song for all of you," you nervously tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. "With our anniversary being today, I've been thinking a lot about us and all the time that's passed and the what the future will hold, and I-I just thought that this song would be the perfect way to express all of that."

Lucifer placed a hand on the small of your back as he looked down at you with an awe-filled, adoring expression. "I wasn't aware you could play. I would've loved to play with you sometime." You leaned up and pressed a kiss to his lips. "There will be time for that in the future. For now, it's time for your surprise," you hovered your fingers over the keys and hesitated. The song the message shared was important but would be hard for your lovers to hear. You glanced over at them. "J-Just listen, please. Okay?" Beel frowned at the serious look on your face and nodded. He could sense that there was something important about this performance, something almost dire, that clearly frightened you. "Of course." You took in a shaky breath as you began to move your finger across the keys.

"You put all your faith in my dreams. You gave me the world that I wanted. What did I do to deserve you?" Your smooth voice filled the room and wrapped around the hearts of each of the demons. They smiled gently at your words as a warmth filled their chests. In the years that they were fortunate enough to have you in their lives, they had spent every last second doing their best to keep you happy. They would give you the world if you asked for it, and you knew that. "I follow your steps with my feet. I walk on the road that you started. I need you to know that I heard you. Every word." Since coming here, the brothers have shown you a number of things. Lucifer taught you to be more confident and take pride in the things that you've achieved. Mammon taught you that it was okay to be selfish sometimes to do the things that you wanted. Together, you and Leviathan learned that the only opinion that truly matters is your own. Satan taught you that you define your own fate and meaning and that no one can say who you are except you. Asmodeus taught you to appreciate the pleasures in life, no matter how big or small. Beelzebub engrained in you that your body is a temple that you must cherish, look after, and love. And finally, Belphegore taught you that it's alright to take time for yourself. Each of them had impacted you and fundamentally changed the way that you looked at life, and you would never be able to thank them enough for that. "I've waited way too long to say. Everything you mean to me," you swallowed down the lump that was beginning to form in your throat. You had waited too long to tell them this, that much was true. By now they were irreversibly attached to you. Though you were grateful for it and loved them in return, there was something all of you had been avoiding discussing. You took in a shaky breath; you couldn't hold it off anymore. "In case I don't live forever let me tell you now," You could hear their breaths get caught in their throats. Lucifer's hand froze on your back, while Belphie quickly sat up from where he was laying on your shoulder. "MC, what are y-you saying? What are you-" Levi's voice stuttered from behind you. You couldn't bring yourself to look at them as you continued, "I love you more than you'll wrap your head around," you finally glanced over at Levi. The otaku's eyes were wide and filled with fear and concern as he scanned you for any missed injuries or signs of illness. At finding none, his eyebrows narrowed in confusion. You offered him a reassuring smile before looking back down at the keys. "In case I don't live forever, let me tell you the truth. I'm everything that I am because of you." Satan's trembling hand gripped onto your shoulder as he placed a kiss on the top of your head. "MC, my love, that is beautiful. But you can't just say something like that and not expect us to be concerned. Are you alright? Should I be getting a doctor or Barbatos or do I need to take you to a human hospital?" You paused for a moment to turn to your lovers. "I'm okay. There's nothing wrong with me, only that I'm human," you watched as they tensed in realization. "Treasure, that's not-" Mammon stepped forward, but you lifted a hand to stop him. "I've been thinking about the passing of time a lot lately, a-a-and I need to say this. Please, just let me finish?" The sound of your voice close to tears had the brothers wanting to do nothing more than wrap you up in their arms and never let you go again. But there was this desperate glint in your eyes, that none of them could deny. Belphie laid his head back down on your shoulder and buried his face into the fabric of your top. "Go ahead, angel. We're listening." You turned your head to lightly kissed his head, whispering a small thank you, before picking back up the song.

The music filled the room once more, but unlike before where it filled your lovers with joy at the thought of such a sentimental gift, a feeling of dread and unease now swirled in their stomachs. "I've carried this song in my mind. Listen it's echoing in me. But I never helped you to hear it." Your mortality was something that had weighed on your thoughts for years now. You never mentioned it for you knew that the brothers would just brush off the subject. They had lost so much already; they didn't even want to begin thinking about the day when you would no longer be with them. But with each passing year, the subject had become more and more crucial, yet you were still too much of a coward to bring such a distressing topic to light. You had hoped the song would lighten the blow, but based on the way Mammon's eyes were squeezed shut and his fists were pressed to his mouth, as though whispering a prayer, it hadn't. Tears pricked your eyes at the sight as you felt your throat tighten. "We, we've only got so much time. I'm pretty sure it would kill me if you didn't know that pieces of me were pieces of you." It was true. You carried the boys with you where ever you went, both literally through your pacts and figuratively through the pieces of their personalities that you have mirrored throughout the years. You often find yourself mimicking Lucifer's eye-brow raise when someone is acting particularly stupid. The sight of food or beautiful clothes causes your heart to thrumb with excitement, just like it does for Beel and Asmo. You have a deeper appreciation for anime and astrology from your many nights with Levi and Belphie. You're more knowledgeable and educated in literature from your countless hours in the library with Satan. You were more conscious with your money after your few attempts of trying to teach Mammon how to budget. You were one with your boys; a beautiful collage of the experiences and times that you had all spent together. You just hoped that they knew that. "I've waited way too long to say. Everything you mean to me." Asmodeus claimed your other side, as one of his hands moved up to delicately wipe a tear from your face. You noticed, with an aching heart, that his cheeks were tearstained as well. Your lip trembled as you opened your mouth to sing the chorus. "In case I don't live forever let me tell you now. I love you more than you'll ever wrap your head around. In case I don't live forever, let me tell you the truth. I'm everything that I am because of you." At this point, you weren't singing so much as you were sobbing. You could feel your hands tremble heavily as you pushed them to keep playing. The only thing keeping you from breaking down completely was the solid feeling of the brother's touch supporting you as they lent you their strength. You squeezed your eyes shut and played hard on the keys, causing the brothers to jump a little as you began to belt. "I have a hero if ever I need one!" Flashes of the countless times that they had come to your rescue flashed in your mind. Unknown to you, the brothers weren't thinking of them rescuing you at all, but rather how you had saved each and every one of them. "I just look up to you and I see one! I'm a man 'cause you taught me to be one," your voice quivered with emotion as you held the falsetto note at the end. You leaned over the keys, suppressed cries falling from your lips as your shoulders shook. Beel placed a hand over top of one of your own and met your gaze. "You don't have to finish this MC. We understand what you're trying to say and we can just end the song here and talk if you want." It was tempting. Honestly, your hands our practically useless with how much they were shaking. But this wasn't just for them anymore. Speaking the words that had been swarming your mind for too many years out loud, although painful, also freed you from a sense of guilt that you weren't even aware that you were carrying. "I-I'd like to finish it. I-If you all don't mind." Belphie's arms came to wrap around your waist and Asmo

pressed a kiss to your cheek. Lucifer's hand on your back moved in comforting circles, while Satan repeated the motion with his thumb on your shoulder. Levi moved closer to lean onto the piano for support. Mammon gave you a tearful smile as Beel lifted his hand off of yours. "Of course. Take your time, honey bun." You took several deep breaths to calm yourself before lightly playing the chords. You met the eyes of your partners and hoped that they could see the utter adoration and passion that was flooding through your veins for them. "In case you don't live forever let me tell you now," you playfully elbowed Belphie and turned your head to kiss Asmo's cheek. "I love you more than you'll ever wrap your head around." As the music picked up the tempo once more, you couldn't help but grin even as tears poured down your cheeks. "In case you don't live forever, let me tell you the truth. I'm everything that I am-" You closed your eyes, tilting your head back, as you allowed yourself to give in to the music and fully feel everything that you had been suppressing. "Woah, Woah, Woah. " As you began to sing the melody again, your eyes snapped open as you heard the brothers harmonize alongside you. Lucifer, Satan and Beel's low voices rang deep like the growl of thunder. Asmodeus and Belphie hit the higher octaves, chiming like bells ringing in the wind. Mammon and Levi sang the original notes with you, remaining strong and pure like waves against a shore. You laughed brightly as a radiant sensation of love blanketed you in warmth and soaked up any traces of fear that lingered. "In case I don't live forever, let me tell you the truth." You looked around at the brothers tenderly and softly played the final notes. They all smiled back at you, eyes gleaming with that same sense of passionate affection that you had felt moments earlier. Your heart fluttered in your chest as you came to a realization. No matter how much or little time you had left with each other, you would spend every moment of it at each other's side loving another unconditionally. "As long as I'm here as I am," you rested your head on top of Belphie's and smiled softly, "so are you." *** This was so sweet and sad at the same time and I just LOVED writing it! Oh my goodness, I haven't written a song fic in ages, so this was a little challenging, but I just loved it so much. Thank you @ester-is-here for this beautiful request!*** TAGLIST: @thegrimgrinningghost

@henry-and-the-seven-lords

@satans-beloved-riv

@cosmixbun

@sufzku

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cryonme · 3 years

Text

𝐈 𝐖𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐁𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 𝐕

PART FIVE- “Just Because They’re Not Here Doesn’t Mean They Stopped Being Wonderful.”

part one here

part two here

part three here

part four here

short series- jj maybank x kook!reader

word count- 4.3k

tw- guns, knives, mentions of weed, stabbing, swearing, mentions of death, fluff 😊, angst 👿, mentions of murder, fighting, drinking, mentions of stitches and hospitals. lmk if I missed anything

a/n- don’t u all love how I said this was gonna be a “short” series and now we’re at 19.2k words total and five parts? and not even done yet? lol. anyway, this chapter is a fucking rollercoaster of emotions and shit gets really real really fast so hold onto your hats, grab some popcorn, and happy reading!

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

“Wait, what the fuck?”

Your friends all stared at you with wide eyes, mouths agape. JJ’s grip tightened on your thigh, you winced a little but he didn’t let up, which you were glad he didn’t.

“Wait, your mom is dead?” John B asked, earning a smack on the back of the head from Sarah.

“You had a sister?!” Pope explained, confusion plastered on his face. “I thought that was just a ru- OW!” A smack from Kiara.

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes. “Yeah.”

“You think you know a person then all of the sudden she has a dead mom and sister who were killed by her step brother that you didn’t know about.” John B said, a hint of humor in his voice.

“This isn’t funny, John B.” Sarah scolded.

“It’s fine, Sarah.” You assured your friend. “Look, I know I’m a shit friend for not telling you guys things about my life. Tyler, the abortion, my mom and sister. And I’ll work on getting better at it but all of that isn’t important right now, okay?” You looked between John B and Pope, waiting expectedly before they both nodded and backed off.

“What makes you say that, (Y/n)?” Kie asked you, fully turning her attention to you.

“Well when- um, when Tyler showed up at my house that day,” You swallowed your fear, sitting up straight and taking a deep breath. “When Tyler showed up at my house that day, he said ‘I did everything I could to get my mom to marry your dad. My mom doesn’t know, but what she doesn’t know won’t kill her, and now you’re ruining everything with your fat fucking mouth.’”

The room was silent. Nobody really knew what to make out of all of this, all this time you had come off so unbothered, like your life was picture perfect and there was never a dark cloud in your sky. Everything that had happened the past couple of weeks came out of nowhere for the group of friends, especially JJ, John B and Pope, who didn’t even know you had a step brother. But when the three thought back on it, they never really asked.

After about a minute of everyone sitting in shock, Sarah spoke up, “Well, we need to tell your dad and Christine, right?’

You shook your head, “Not until I have enough proof. The entire island’s eyes are on me right now and if I’m wrong I make a fool of myself. I know this is gonna sound really stupid but, I need to find Tyler.”

“No.” JJ protested, his voice sharp.

“You’re right, (Y/n). That does sound stupid.” Pope agreed.

“Super stupid.” John B chimed in.

“I love you, but I have never heard more stupid words leave your mouth.” Kiara said.

“Guys, maybe hear her out.” Sarah said.

Kie whipped her head to the side, looking at the blonde girl in bewilderment. “Seriously? I’m not listening to you when all you seem to do is put (Y/n) in more danger.”

“I didn’t mean to! I didn’t know what the fuck to do!” “You tell someone, dumbass!”

“Jesus, you two! Shut the fuck up!” You interjected, standing up and stomping your foot, ignoring the shooting pain going up your leg.

“I came here because I need help, not to sit here and be judged and have you two fight with each other. Kie, lay off. I begged Sarah not to say anything until I was ready, and promised not to go home until I said something, okay? And you two.” You gestured to John B and Pope, “Telling me I’m stupid for something that I haven’t even explained yet is a little premature. Can we all fucking focus?” You had your time to cry and allow yourself to be broken, but now it was time to get shit done.

Kie shrunk in her seat, muttering a half assed “Sorry” under her breath and crossing her arms. John B and Pope nodded, both boys looking down at their shoes. You sat back down and JJ’s hand returned to its rightful spot on your thigh.

“Now, just, listen to me for a second. We,” You put the emphasis on that word so everyone would be a little bit more open to the idea, “Need to find Tyler so we can somehow record a confession from him. I’ll rile him up, and once I get the confession we get the fuck out. Got it?”

“How the fuck are you gonna find him? Even the Sheriff's department can’t find him.” Sarah said.

“Right,” You responded, “First thing to consider, the police are incompetent, especially here. They probably looked at my house and his job before giving up.”

JJ chuckled, shaking his head as he listened to you talk in awe.

“Second thing to consider, I have his number. I can ask him to meet up and talk it out.”

“The more you talk, the more I really don’t like this plan.” JJ muttered, raking his fingers through his hair.

“The more you talk, the more I wanna kick your teeth in.” You smiled sweetly, “This is the only way.” You tried pulling a joke, but JJ’s face remained concerned, so your face fell and you leaned into him. “I’ll be okay, JJ. I’ve been dealing with Tyler for years, okay?”

JJ nodded, taking a deep breath before pulling away from you.

“So what can we do?”

“Wherever I meet up with Tyler, I need you all to be on standby. Someone on lookout, someone hiding near me just in case things go south, and someone waiting in the vam.”

Everyone agreed in unison, nodding their heads. “Anything we can to get this asshole put away.” John B said, giving you an encouraging smile.

After going over a few details, and finally sending the text to Tyler that you wanted to meet up, the pogues dispersed around the chateau. Pope was talking Sarah’s ear off about the latest book he had just finished while she politely listened and even threw in a couple of her own thoughts, John B and Kie playfully jabbed long sticks at each other, and JJ stood on the porch, watching you swing by yourself on the hammock, lost in thought. He was trying to decide if he should approach you, or give you space. Just then you turned your head and made eye contact with the blond boy, a soft smile on your face, your signature red lipstick back where it belongs.

Fuck space.

He bounded down the stairs and made his way over to you on the hammock, plopping down next to you. Neither of you said anything for a couple minutes, there wasn’t much to say.

“I was 14.” You said, breaking the silence, causing JJ’s head to turn towards you. He stayed silent as you continued.

“Hit and run.” You laughed bitterly. “My little sister was 12. We were finally getting to the point where we didn’t fight everyday, we were becoming friends. She had just started asking me for advice about boys and was always asking to have sleepovers.” You smiled, remembering your little sister fondly. “It still hurts. It’ll always hurt, I think. But, I’ve learned I can’t change what happened, and I try to be thankful for the time I had with her. I would say she probably wouldn’t want me to be sad, but that’s not true, she loved attention.” JJ laughed with you this time.

“What’s her name?” JJ asked.

“Layla.” You responded, her name feeling weird on your tongue. You hadn’t said her name in years. “And my mom, gosh there was no one like my mom.” JJ wasn’t asking, but you were telling.

“She just always understood, you know? She’d let me stay home if my mind was taking over, she continued to buy the ice cream I told her was my favorite when I was 7, I didn’t have the heart to tell her I didn’t like it anymore.” You frowned, staring at your hands. “Christine is great, I love her with everything in me. But sometimes I wish she was in my life under different circumstances.”

JJ nodded in understanding, taking his hand in yours and pressing a lingering kiss to it. “They sound wonderful.”

“They are- were.”

JJ shook his head, “Just because they’re not here doesn’t mean they stopped being wonderful.”

You yanked JJ’s hand so his arm wrapped around your shoulder and you leaned into him, earning a sweet kiss on the top of your head.

“You’re sweet, princess.” You teased, using the nickname that you would use when the two of you fought.

“Tell anyone and you’re dead meat, baby.”

You laughed, resting your head on his chest. “What changed your mind about me?” You asked, biting your bottom lip.

JJ thought for a moment, mulling over his words to avoid saying the wrong thing.

“I never changed my mind.”

Your heart dropped as you began to pull away, feeling embarrassed.

“Uh uh uh, let me finish.” JJ pulled you back against him and you huffed. “I never changed my mind because I’ve felt this way about you all along. I’ve never had such strong feelings for a person before, so when you came along I mistook all of the signs as hatred. My mom left and my dad…” JJ trailed off for a moment, trying to put together his words in the least concerning way possible, “My dad takes his anger out on me. And I just never really learned how to receive love, or how to understand it.”

Your heart sank at JJ’s words. All those times he’d show up to the Chateau with bruises and scrapes, telling everyone to fuck off instead of boasting about how he “totally kicked that kooks ass”, it was his dad.

“JJ-”

“Mmm, let’s not do that now, yeah? Just know I’ve adored you this whole time, I was just too stupid to see it.”

“When did you change your mind about me?” JJ asked.

You pondered for a moment, thinking back on when you first started thinking of JJ differently.

“That night at the Boneyard, when Tyler showed up. I was dancing with Pope and all I could think was, ‘I need JJ’, and then there you were. I didn’t want you to ever leave my side again. When you took me back to the Chateau and sat me down on the couch, I was confused because I felt so safe and loved, more than I ever have. It was so out of the blue. Hours before we had just been screaming at each other and then I never wanted you to let me go.”

“You’re making this really hard, Red.” JJ huffed, running a hand over his face.

“What?” You asked craning your neck to look up at him.

“Not kissing you.”

You sat up from your position on his chest, turning your body so you were facing each other, your legs hanging off one side of the hammock and his off the other.

“Then kiss me.”

“(Y/n)...”

“What, scared?”

JJ didn’t say anything, he just looked at you. You had that striking red grin, and your eyes held that glint of mischief and joy.

“You were just inconsolable like, an hour ago.”

“But I’m not now.”

“I-”

“Please, JJ.” You pouted, your eyes big and your frown deep as you slowly reached for him.

And he couldn’t say no to that face.

He slowly brought his hand up to cradle the side of your neck, his thumb resting on your cheek as his face slowly leaned into yours, his hand softly pulling you closer by the neck. You brought one hand up to the back of his neck, burying your fingers in his hair as his other hand found its place on your waist. You stared at each other for a moment, noses barely touching. Your heart was beating so fast you felt like it was about to crawl out of your throat, the anticipation was driving you crazy but you were also cherishing every second of it, just being so close to him, knowing what’s about to happen.

His lips just barely brushed over yours and your entire body erupted in butterflies, goosebumps dancing all up and down your arms and legs.

“You fucker.” You teased and JJ giggled before fully planting his lips on yours. You felt like you had been on fire and had been dumped into an ice bath. The relief that covered your entire body and soul was something you had never felt before. You had kissed plenty of people in your lifetime, and nothing had ever compared to the feeling you had kissing JJ.

You pulled away for a moment to catch your breath, but JJ whined and pulled you back into him, bringing you to sit on his lap as he continued to kiss you. You both giggled and broke apart when you nearly toppled out of the hammock, JJ’s hands immediately steadying you. He looked up at you while stroking your cheekbone with his thumb before planting soft kisses to your arm, trailing his lips up to your shoulder, neck, cheek and finally one last sweet kiss on your lips.

“Well it’s about goddamn time!” John B yelled as the rest of the pogues whooped and hollered, jumping up and down. Both of you flipped off your friends and JJ kissed you once more, your middle fingers still in the air.

“You’re fucking incredible.” JJ muttered once you broke yet another kiss.

“I know.” You smirked.

Once JJ helped you off the hammock, with a lot of wincing and you telling him his kissing made your bruised lip hurt, you made your way back over to your friends, an unmistakable feeling of joy filling everyone’s hearts.

John B handed you and JJ a beer, which you had to decline because of your concussion, much to your dismay, but you gladly took the joint that Kie offered you, blowing out the smoke into JJ’s mouth before taking the hit for yourself. The sun started to set on the Chateau, so Pope and John B set up a fire and Kie brought out her ukulele, her and Sarah singing in harmony to Over the Rainbow by Israel Kamakawiwo’ole. Your heart swelled in your chest listening to JJ quietly singing along with his arm slung around your shoulders, his face was tinted the slightest shade of pink from being in the sun all day, making his eyes look impossibly more blue. You knew tomorrow brought troubles and anxiety, but you pushed them to the back of your mind, enjoying this beautiful moment with your friends. You rested your head on JJ’s shoulder, your hand coming up to hold his that was around your shoulder, placing a gentle kiss on his hand. JJ blushed and squeezed you just a little bit tighter.

“(Y/n), you staying the night?”

You smiled and nodded, your eyes a bit droopy from the weed. You had texted Christine already, telling her you were staying the night and assuring her that everyone was staying the night and you were safe.

“Yes!” Sarah exclaimed, getting up from her spot next to John B. “More beer?” Everyone apart from you nodded as Sarah made her way inside the house to grab more cold beer.

“Aw, well if it isn’t the goonies.”

That voice.

Tyler approached the Chateau, Topper, Kelce and Rafe hot on his heels.

Everyone stood up immediately, JJ pushed you behind him without a second thought.

“Heard my baby sister wanted to meet up tonight, thought I’d come to her, spare her the trouble.” Tyler said, shoving his hands in his pockets.

You were appreciative of JJ’s protectiveness over you, but this was your fight. “I know what you did, Tyler.” You said, trying your hardest to hide the shakiness in your voice as you pushed JJ out of your way, taking a couple steps forward.

“There she is!” Tyler exclaimed, gesturing his arms to you. “You don’t know shit, dumbass.”

“You killed my mom and sister.”

“Me?” Tyler raised a hand to his chest in shock and turned to his friends, who all shook their heads like you were crazy. “I would never do such a thing.” “You said-”

“Did you hit your head too hard the other day? Sounds to me like you’re making things up.”

He was trying to make you feel crazy, and you weren’t putting up with it.

“What was your plan, huh?” You asked, standing your ground. “Hit my mom and my little sister with your car, devastating my family so my dad could go running into your unknowing mother’s arms. Were you gonna kill all of us next so you could get the money? How exactly did you plan on doing that?”

Tyler’s chest was heaving up and down, sharp breaths coming in and out of his nose.

“Layla was 12 years old, you psychopath.”

“I never meant to kill your fucking sister!”

And there it was. Eerie silence fell over the Chateau like a heavy blanket.

“You motherfucker.” You shrieked, stomping forward and sending your hand flying across his cheek. Before you could even blink, Tyler had his hand around your throat and the barrel of a gun pressed to your jaw. Everything seemed to move in slow motion. You could see the pogues, Kiara with a hand over her mouth and tears in her eyes, hugging Sarah close to her, John B and Pope holding JJ back, his eyes wild with anger and fear. You could see Topper and Kelce with wide eyes, obviously unaware of the gun in your step brother's possession. You could see Rafe with a knowing grin on his face. Bastard.

You were terrified, panic surging through your body as you tried to stay still so you wouldn’t anger him with any sudden movements.

“Any of you even think about moving and I kill her!” He screamed.

“Tyler, put the gun down man, what the fuck?” Topper said, his voice calm, trying to talk him down.

“Fuck you!”

And suddenly Tyler was on the ground, the gun flying into the darkness. JJ wasted no time running to your step brother, grabbing him by his shirt collar and beating his face with his fists. You and Rafe made eye contact before both of you made a break for the gun, scrambling through the darkness. Rafe tackled you down and tried to reach for it, but you kneed him in the crotch, hoping to buy you a couple seconds. The Cameron boy groaned and held his area, toppling over and whining in a fetal position.

“Pussy boy.” You rolled your eyes and crawled toward the gun, smiling once it was in your grip before Rafe pulled you back by your ankle. You flipped over onto your back and pointed the gun at him.

“You don’t have the guts.”

“Self defense, bitch. Now get off of me.”

Rafe backed up with his hands in the air and you made your way back to the group, gun in hand, still pointed at Rafe. Tyler and JJ were going at it, both throwing punches and kicks, the rest of the group fighting off Topper and Kelce.

“Back off my friends or I'll shoot!” You yelled, and everyone stopped and turned to you with your gun pointed at Rafe. The three kooks backed off with their hands up in surrender.

“You won’t shoot me, Little Red.” Tyler said, walking closer to you.

“I will if you try anything.” You responded, taking the gun off of Rafe and shoving him forward so he was still in your eyesight, now pointing it at Tyler.

“You stay away from her!” JJ yelled, charging towards Tyler but quickly being held back by Rafe and Topper.

Tyler got so close to you that the gun was touching his t-shirt.

Why was he testing you? He had to have something up his sleeve.

The motherfucker literally had something up his sleeve.

Tyler tore a switchblade out of his jacket sleeve and jabbed it into your collarbone, and in the same second you fired the gun.

Your brain felt fuzzy, you couldn’t even feel the knife in your collarbone, the only way you knew it was there was because you could see it sticking out of the corner of your eye.

You heard screams, multiple screams.

Footsteps running away.

Was someone crying?

Were you crying?

Everyone ran to you, JJ leading the group, so he got to you first. He immediately put his hands on your face, frantically searching your eyes before you dropped to your knees, JJ following suit.

“Baby, look at me.” He said firmly. Someone gently took the gun from your hands, why were you still holding it? You brought your hand up to touch the knife, crying out in pain from the smallest touch.

“No, don’t touch it, okay? Leave it alone, paramedics are on their way okay?”

You still didn’t look at him, your eyes were wide as you stared at everyone around you, their faces full of concern.

“She’s in shock.” Pope stated. He was crouched in front of you, next to JJ. “Try to bring her back to reality.”

“How the fuck do I do that?” JJ snapped.

“Chill, JJ! Talk to her, touch her, anything!”

JJ’s left hand continued to cradle your face and you leaned into his touch as his right hand threaded through your hair. “You’re okay, okay? Can you talk to me?” His voice broke, tears beginning to fill his blue eyes.

Your eyes wandered away from the group and landed on Tyler’s body, lifeless. You let out a gasp as if all of the wind had been knocked out of your body.

“I killed him.” You rasped.

JJ quickly moved in front of the body, blocking your view of him. Your breathing was shallow as you brought your hands up to your neck, trying to claw at the skin to make way for you to breathe. Pope’s hands gently grabbed yours, moving them away from your neck and holding them in your lap. JJ gave him a thankful nod and he situated himself in front of you.

“Christine-” Your body flooded with guilt and sadness for your stepmom, that was her son. He may have done unspeakable things to you and her family but that was her son. And you killed him.

“Hey, hey, hey. Shhh,” JJ was quick to stop the terrible thought. “You had to, okay? She’ll understand. Just focus on me, baby.”

You nodded and squeezed Pope’s hands, focusing your eyes on JJ’s.

“You’re doing so good, pretty girl. Just a couple more minutes, okay?”

You nodded again. The pain in your collarbone was beginning to worsen as your shock wore off and you whimpered.

Great, you thought, another fucking injury to make my life even better.

Really your whole body hurt, your concussion and bruises worsening and stitches ripping open from Rafe tackling you to the ground.

“It hurts.” You whine, a single tear escaping from your eye, JJ wiped it before it could run down your face. “I know.” He whispered. “I know, my love, I’m so sorry.” He rested his forehead on yours, trying his best to give you as much comfort as he could without pulling you against him and driving the blade further in.

“Fuck, you guys. We didn’t get a recording.” Kie said, slapping her palm against her forehead. You removed one hand from Pope’s and worked through your pain and brought your phone out of your back pocket, tossing it on the ground, not having enough strength to hand it to her.

John B picked it up and smiled, your phone had been recording the entire time, starting just a minute after Tyler made himself known at the Chateau.

“(Y/n), you magnificent kook.” John B said, giving your arm a squeeze. You had moved your forehead to rest on JJ’s shoulder, your body posed awkwardly to avoid the knife being touched, one hand still in Pope’s.

Everyone was relieved, but the dead body in their presence and the knife in your body made it hard to be completely relieved. Once the paramedics and police arrived, JJ had to release you from his hold, watching the paramedics put you on the gurney and load you in the back of the ambulance, by yourself, for the second time.

Kiara and Pope were talking to the police, showing them the proof on your phone and the gun and walking them through everything that happened while JJ watched the ambulance drive away, as soon as it was out of sight he broke down, John B quick to pull his friend into his arms, Sarah gently leaned her head on his back, her hand coming up to stroke his back

“She doesn’t deserve any of this.” JJ cried, holding onto his best friend. He knew you were gonna be okay, the paramedics said the knife would be easy to remove and they could stitch up the wound easily, but he was worried about you. You would never be the same.

“She doesn’t.” John B agreed.

“I just want her to be okay.”

“I know, bubba, me too.” John B replied, his own tears brimming in his eyes, “She will be.”

JJ could feel Sarah shaking against him, her tears wetting his shirt and he unravelved in arm from John B to bring her into the hug. “Get in here, kook princess.” JJ teased through his tears. Pope and Kiara soon joined the group hug, comforting their friends through touch.

“What did Shoupe say?” JJ asked once they all pulled away, wiping at his tears.

“They said (Y/n)’s okay, a very obvious case of self defense, but they’re still going to ask her a couple questions once she’s of sound mind.” Pope answered and Kiara nodded.

“Thank God.” Sarah breathed out and JJ’s shoulders relaxed in relief, one less thing to worry about.

“Well why are we all just standing here?” John B asked after a couple moments of silence. “Let’s go see our girl.”

“I am still meeeeee you are still youuuuu” I couldn’t get that damn song out of my head while I was writing this

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hanoella · 3 years

Text

Deserving

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x healer!Reader

Word Count: 2.1k

Summary: When someone bad mouths Bucky in your presence, you set things straight.

Warnings: Angst, but with happy ending, and one vaguely 18+ insult? I'm new.

Speaking of- @wkemeup has inspired me to post my writing for the first time! For their 9k writing challenge, I used this prompt:

"Character A is the target of harassment on the street. Shamed, they pretend it doesn’t bother them. Until it happens in the presence of Character B, who reigns hell on whoever dared to upset [A]"

Enjoy!

..........

Bucky was used to the whispers he got from people the street when he passed by them.

“Is that-?”

“Don’t make eye contact, he’s dangerous.”

“They just let him walk around like he hasn’t killed a bunch of people?”

His enhanced hearing picked up more than he wished it did. He liked to believe it didn’t bother him but deep down it did. It was just one more reason to stay secluded. Isolated. Alone. And he had been successfully doing that.

Until you came along.

Having been the test subject of a super serum version that focused on health and regeneration, you used your healing powers to help the Avengers get back to world-saving shape. Bucky hadn’t been keen on anyone touching him, much less someone he didn’t know. Despite his best efforts, he had caved in when you noticed he was having a bad day with his shoulder and offered to help. Since then, your companionship has been like a guilty pleasure.

You had this way of making him feel like he was the most important person in the world to you. Regardless of what he thought was evident, you only seemed to notice the good in him, even when he protested.

“There’s nothing I can do to right the wrongs that I’ve committed. Redemption isn’t possible. I don’t deserve-”

“Stop.” You said, cutting him off. “You are amazing. You have been through everything that you’ve been through and you still give back to the world. You fight for a world that made you this way, a world that gives you nothing back and yet you fight. It’s the world that doesn’t deserve you.”

Bucky swallowed hard. Looking at you in your eyes, he saw no dishonesty. Only pure admiration.

After that, there was no hope of him being alone. You cracked open his shell slowly but surely and now Bucky couldn’t imagine life without you.

Which led him to his current predicament.

“Come on, please? It’ll be so good and only a few blocks away. I know tapioca sounds gross, but you’ll love it!”

Bucky didn’t know what bubble tea was but apparently it was worth begging him for the past 20 minutes while you worked on his shoulder. Your hands emitted a warm white light as you gently massaged his shoulder. The direct contact wasn’t necessary but Bucky hadn’t complained when you started doing it and it’s become routine every since.

“I don’t know. I know I’m old but I don’t have to resort to tapioca yet.”

Bucky let a moment pass before his lip twitched up into a smile. You feigned annoyance as you cut off the healing and placed your hands on his shoulders.

“How about you go with me and I won’t bill the heck out of you for my magical five-star massages.” You say as you squeeze his shoulders.

“Okay okay, fine.”

Bucky put his hands up in defeat as he got up from the couch he was sitting on and turned to face you.

You swallowed as you let your eyes drift across his chest before you grabbed his shirt from off the back of the couch and tossed it to him.

“Alright! I’m so excited!”

Bucky listened to you chatter on about the different flavors he could try while he put on his shirt. Sometimes, he couldn’t believe he actually had a friend besides Steve. Sure, it helped that you had been Steve’s friend first. But there was something about you having grown closer to him that made him feel special. Never did Bucky think there would be a time that he’d be jealous over a girl that Steve was friends with rather than the other way around. Times were certainly different.

“You coming?”

Bucky broke away from his thoughts and made his way towards the doorway that you were standing in.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

---

Yeah, he knew this was a bad idea.

As soon as you two had left Stark Tower, the whispers started. While the café was only two blocks away, you noticed something was off a block into the trip.

“You alright?” You asked as you tried to decipher his facial expression.

“Yeah. Fine.”

You looked at him skeptically and then shifted your eyes to follow his, glancing around you. You slowly nodded in understanding as you looked at the people around you who were trying not to draw attention to themselves.

“Okay. We can talk about it later.”

Bucky was thankful that most people talked quietly enough so that you couldn’t hear what they were saying.

Keyword: Most.

You two arrived at the café, where it was slightly crowded. It was a warm afternoon, the perfect time to get a cool drink. Before heading inside, you gently placed your hand on his arm for a moment to reassure him.

“If you want, we could look at the menu out here and then I’ll go inside to order it.”

Bucky shifted his weight slightly from one side to the other as he contemplated it.

“Nah. We can go in together.”

“Okay.” you said, gently smiling to hopefully reassure him.

You both enter the building and make your way to stand in line. Bucky looked around at the seating areas. It reminded him of a Starbucks but with a more pastel color scheme. You looked at him and he raised an eyebrow in response. You smiled, happy that he was with you. Bucky’s heart skipped a beat and he smiled back.

That’s when you hear it.

“Is that that Hydra goon? Hey, go back to Siberia you brainwashed Hydra dog!”

You spun around violently the same time Bucky did with an incredulous look on your face, making eye contact with the college aged boy further back in line who was currently sniggering with his friends.

You stalked over to them before speaking in a low even tone.

“Sergeant Barnes has done more for the world than you could ever dream of doing. Apologize.”

You had let the venom creep into your voice, shouting the last word and silencing the rest of the line. Bucky walked up to you and put a hand on your shoulder, trying to turn your attention to him.

“C’mon. It’s not worth it.”

You let out a slow harsh exhale from your nose but didn’t move. The man only sneered.

“Why don’t you scurry along. I don’t care if you’re where he sticks his-”

The next thing Bucky registered was a nasty sounding crack as your fist connected with the jerk’s cheekbone. A round of gasps came from the surrounding crowd as he fell on the floor, completely dazed. You let out a pained grunt as you bent over, holding your hand while trying to cover the white light that started coming over your hand where the skin had bust open and something had definitely cracked.

“Okay, time to go.” Bucky said as he made an executive decision to get you two the heck out of there before anybody could react further. He put his hand on your back and quickly guided you out of the store, walking until you were out of the vicinity and almost back to the tower. You could tell that Bucky was not happy with you since he hadn’t said anything the whole way back. You entered the building and then stood silently in the elevator as it made its way up, refusing to meet his eye.

The elevator dinged as it opened up on the team’s dorm floor. You both walked quickly trying to avoid other people unsuccessfully as Sam stepped out into the hallway from the gym.

“Hey you two, what’re you… What happened to you?” He asked with a furrowed brow, nodding his head towards your hand as you walked past. Bucky and you answered at the same time.

“Nothing-”

“None of your business Sam-”

You gave Bucky a look and started chastising him.

“Hey, don’t be mean to him just because-”

“Keep. Walking.” He said through clenched teeth.

You rolled you eyes and shrugged apologetically at Sam as Bucky punched in the code to your apartment and swung the door open. He nudged you inside and then followed, shutting the door forcefully behind him.

Sam looked down the hall for a moment longer before shrugging it off. Natasha popped her head out into the hallway from the gym.

“What’s all the commotion?”

“Not sure. I think Mr. Tall, Dark and Metal left a few brain cells behind in the pod the last time he was frozen.”

Natasha snorted and then turned back into the gym.

---

Bucky closed the door behind him and then swung his arms out in confusion, giving you the same look of disbelief that he gives Yori when he starts a fight with his neighbors. You gave him the same look back, as if he was crazy for questioning your actions.

“What was that?” He finally asked.

“That guy was crazy! How could I not say something to him?”

“You didn’t have to hit him and hurt yourself! People say stuff like that all the time, you just have to ignore it and move on with your day.”

You stayed silent for a moment, averting your gaze and holding your injured hand that was gently glowing. Bucky gently let out his breath. He closed the distance between you and put his hand under yours to help you support it. His other hand grasped your forearm, gently moving over your smooth skin. He glanced down and watched as the inflammation went away and a bone shifted back into place under your skin.

“Please,” He whispered, his hold on you tightening ever so slightly. “It’s not worth all the trouble. It’s not worth you getting hurt.”

“No.”

Bucky snapped his head back up to see you calm and determined. Speaking again, you look into his eyes.

“It is worth it.”

He blinked twice, not having expected that answer.

“Why?”

“Because if I had let him say what he was going to say. Then to me, it would be validating anyone who has ever said anything like that about you. I can’t let you believe that any of that is true.”

“I don’t believe it.”

“But you do.” You cried out, slipping your newly healed hand out of his grasp and stepping away.

“I can see it in your actions, Bucky. I see it when you deny yourself anything that would make you happy. I see it when you try to hide yourself from the world. I see it when you look at me.” You spoke, voice wavering with the last sentence, averting your gaze again. Bucky stood silent as you continued.

“I see a deep sadness in your eyes. I can feel it in your soul when I heal your shoulder. Or when you touch my hand to see if I’ve fallen asleep. I can feel it emanating off of you. But I know for a fact that you deserve to be happy. You deserve to rest and to be happy. How many times have you fought a fight that wasn’t yours because it was the right thing to do? And don’t say it was to redeem yourself because I know it’s more than that. You are a good man, James. You don’t need to prove anything to anyone. But if you need to prove it to yourself than just take a look at me.”

You gently hold his face and guide it so that he’s looking at you. He’s surprised to find your eyes full of tears, threatening to spill over.

“When you look into my eyes, there is nothing but love and admiration for you. When you touch me, I feel the warmth you leave on my skin. When you hear me speak, you should be able to tell from what I say that I genuinely think you deserve the world. When you are hurting, the only thing I feel is your anguish. It kills me, to see you punish yourself so undeservedly.”

You were whispering now, looking up at him. Bucky’s eyes were watering as well, his jaw clenched in an attempt to hold back his emotions. With your hands still gently caressing his cheeks he slowly lowered his head so that his forehead was resting on yours, swallowing hard.

Bucky lifted his head slightly so that he could look at you and he saw nothing but love. Your eyelashes were wet and shimmering from tears you shed for him. Your cheeks were flushed from the overwhelming feeling that you had for him. He looked into the depths of your eyes and saw only his future with you. Finally, his gaze settles on your lips, soft and supple.

“Please,” you begged. “Please do not ask me to stand idly by as the world tears you apart. You are worth more to me than anything else in it.”

Slowly, his hands touch your waist and slide back until he’s holding you against him. Closing the gap between you, you kiss.

Nothing more in this world could assure him of your love. For once, he believes it.

#kas9kwc #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes angst #fatws #bucky x y/n #bucky imagine

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hotwings0203 · 3 years

Text

I JUST SAW FIGHT CLUB AND HOOOLLYYY-

Bro could you IMAGINE FightClub!Bakugo?

Tw:noncon, language, harassment

Okay okay get this: you’re down in the basement listening to the usual men holler and punch each other around while you do your job as their cute little “accountant”. While many of them have good jobs and a real life, the actual members don’t have time or the intellect to juggle the numbers and money around as fast as you can. You’ve been coming here for a while now, and you’re used to the jeers and wolf-whistles coming your way since you’re basically one of the few or only women who dare to come down here.

But there’s one fighter who just can’t seem to take no for an answer.

Bakugo fucking Katsuki.

The man is ruthless, he’s relentless, he’s a force to be reckoned with on the battlefield. You swear he’s had to have taken a shitload of steroids in his youth, otherwise how else could he have built up that much muscle? There’s no way an average gym-goer has that kinda build.

He’s always the first and the last one out in the rink, swaying back and forth with his fists up, a twisted grin on his face that was so reminiscent of a wolf before it lunges for its prey.

It usually took more than two men to pull him off the unconscious bodies that he had just beaten to a pulp, effectively breaking one of Fight Clubs Rules: get up when someone is down.

But he’s too good to let go, no one has the balls to tell him to take his money somewhere else since they’re all scared shitless of him.

Which leads him to believing that he’s practically a god down here, that he can conquer anything: including you.

No one really calls it harassment because no one really cares. What’s so wrong in a guy having a little crush? What, you came down here seeing all this testosterone but you can’t deal with it yourself? Don’t be a prudish bitch.

“Bakugo, I’m at work right now, I don’t want to.”

“C’mon toots, this ain’t even real work, you’re just fumblin’ my hard earned cash.” He grins slyly and crosses his bulging muscular arms, leaning against the doorway of the little office you’re given to work your magic.

You turn in your rickety seat and glare at him, ignoring the way he licks his lips and lets his eyes roam all over your body. “If I’m so shit at my work then go somewhere else and stop bothering me.”

He chuckles in his baritone voice and shakes his head at you. “Naw, can’t do that sweets. If I did then I’d never be able to see your pretty face again now, could I?” Bakugo leers at you and you turn your face in disgust.

“I don’t wanna go out for lunch, or ever with you. Now get out before I have to call someone in here.”

“Oh, is that so?” He uncrosses his arms and steps through the threshold, his body growing larger and more menacing as he slowly draws closer to you. Luckily a fight had broken out near the office months ago so there was no more door from the aftereffects, but that didn’t mean you felt safe even with open space.

“G-get out. I’m serious, Bakugo-“

“-Call me Katsuki, angel. And you don’t really mean that, do you? Look at you, you can barely look me in the eye when you say such mean things.” His voice drops an octave as he comes to stand in front of your seated form, towering above your wide eyes, clenched fists and trembling figure.

He leans down and you flinch and gasp as his breath ghosts over your face. He places both arms on either side of your chair so you have nowhere to look but him.

“You’re such a nice breath of fresh hair down here, through all the blood and violence. You’re like a flower...” he tucks a stray hair behind your ear and breaths out a laugh when you turn your head and squeeze your eyes shut.

“A flower, so fragile...a flower that smells so fucking good...” you feel like you can’t properly breathe as he leans in next to your ear and inhales deeply.

“A flower waiting to be deflowered herself.”

“What’s going on here?” A lanky body in the doorway appears.

Bakugo pulls back and turns his head ever so slightly towards the dude, growling under his breath at the interruption.

“We’re in the middle of something here, so you can just get the fuck ou-“

“-Well, it doesn’t really look like she’s into whatever you’re doing,” the man scoffs and takes in your pale face and shaking hands.

Bakugo stands to his fullest height, almost neck and neck with the man at the door.

“Yeah? I didn’t hear a complaint from her.” He cocks his head and stretches, allowing his muscles to ripple with each movement, something that didn’t go unseen by your much skinnier savior.

But he doesn’t back down. He only swallows and rubs the back of his neck.

“Well, we’re all being called out to put our bets in for the next match anyways, so you better come out before we get our asses kicked.”

The blond grumbles about weak men and no balls, then casts a dark look at your frozen figure before shouldering past the man at the door, almost knocking him down.

As soon as he’s out of your line of vision, you exhale and relax into your seat.

“You okay?” The fallen soldier scrambles back up and cautiously approaches you, looking over your body in a way that didn’t remind you of Bakugo undressing you with his eyes...rather, it was a protective, and worried once-over.

“Yeah, he’s just...a lot to handle sometimes. Doesn’t know when to quit.” You laugh shakily and run a hand through your hair.

“No wonder the dude’s a menace. He’s used to getting what he wants, I guess.” The man acknowledges this grimly, and for the first time you’re relieved that finally someone hasn’t turned a blind eye to your harassment.

“Are they really calling us down for bets?”

“No, I just said that to get him off your ass. Didn’t seem like you liked whatever he was doing.”

You give him a wobbly smile and he returns it.

“Sooo we should probably run before he comes back up here, right?”

“Oh most definitely,” you actually giggle before leaping out of your seat and joining the man to bound up the steps two at a time to freedom.

You both end up bonding pretty well over the weeks, even going out for coffee and lunch dates here and there. You’ve come to really like him, his shyer demeanor more than a majority of the ragtag men down in the basements, his chivalry refreshing to you amongst the blood and foul language thrown around the ring.

You feel like a woman with him, not some piece of ass like you were used to.

Bakugo noticed all this, of course. You started avidly avoiding him, ducking your head down and hiding behind your new ally before he could open his coarse mouth and stalk towards you. He couldn’t find you in your dingy office anymore either, because your savior was up in a cafe doing the calculations with you, laughing away about the latest matches.

That has to change. Effective immediately.

“Yo, newbie. How you been? Haven’t seen you fightin’ here for a while,” Bakugo claps his meaty hand on the scrawny guy’s back, nearing sending him toppling over.

“Yeah, y’know, just haven’t been feeling it lately.” He rubs the stinging feeling away from his sore shoulders and side eyes the blond suspiciously. He had seen firsthand just how bad-news of a guy he was, and he didn’t wanna get caught up in all that.

But Katsuki wasn’t just all brawn. He had some brains, too.

“Look, I know I prolly gave off a weird first impression with Y/N back then. But it’s all in good health, ‘was just messin’ around like I always do.”

“Yeah, sure...”

“How ‘bout we get some coffee or somethin’? You seem like a solid dude, plus we got shit in common to talk about.”

Like fucking around with my bitch.

“Uh, you sure? I kinda’ wanted to see the last fight,” he trails off unsuredly, scratching his jaw as Katsuki steers him away from the growing crowd.

“There’ll always be fights, man. I wanna show you that I’m a nice guy.”

Bakugo Katsuki was not a nice guy.

And everyone knew that too, which is why when some shifted to give the duo a curious glance he met them with a death glare. Any gazes locked on Katsuki’s hand wrapped around the lanky guy’s shoulders were immediately casted down.

You didn’t see your savior for a while.

It had been two weeks since he mysteriously disappeared from his usual place in the outskirts of the crowd, because unbeknownst to you, a certain fighter was keeping him away from you and convincing him to have a friendly brawl over lunch.

You only found out about it on a Friday night, when a crowd much bigger than before was gathered in the dim basement, voices hushed and whispering.

“What’s going on? Why’s everyone so quiet?” You whisper to one of the usuals.

“‘Heard Bakugo’s fighting some dude that was handpicked by himself. He somehow managed to convince the poor bastard to have some kinda’ match with him.”

You felt your heart sinking.

“Who did he pick?”

“‘Dunno, some skinny guy, a newbie I think. Hasn’t been around for too long so I guess he doesn’t know how big of a monster he’s gonna be beaten by.” The groupie shrugged, and you felt the blood drain from your face.

Without saying another word, you spun around and started running around all over the place looking for either of the two.

You end up stumbling into the men’s bathroom, desperate beyond salvation to stop this bloodbath.

He’s there, he’s at the urinal and he yelps when he hears you barge in. You avert your eyes and let his adjust himself as he sputters indignantly.

“Y/N? What’re you doing in here? This is a men’s-“

“Don’t fight him.”

“What?”

“Don’t fight Bakugo, please, he’s gonna kill you, I know he is-“

“-Calm down, what’re you so worked up about? C’mon, I would’ve thought you’d had a little bit more faith in me to be able to stand my ground.” He teases you but you don’t find it funny, on the contrary you’re terrified out of your mind for his life.

“Did he put you up to this? How could you fight him, you’ve seen what he does to the other guys in the ring!”

“Well yeah, but he knows not to go that hard on me. Actually, he’s not that bad of a guy, we’ve gotten some drinks for the past two weeks and I was wrong about him.”

You gape at him. “Wrong? You saw how he cornered me that one day!”

He shrugs, not put off by the distant memory. “The guy just came back from a fight, he still had testosterone going through him. You can’t blame him for wanting to let a bit of it out, right? You should really give him a chance y’know, he talks about you all the t-“

But you can’t hear anymore, this is madness, there’s barely 10 minutes left until they’re going to call the two down for their death match. You need to find the source of this problem firsthand.

And somehow, a little voice inside your head tells you exactly where you know he is.

You round the corner to your office and there he is in all his glory, seated like a king on your chair, leaned back with his knees spread, carelessly looking through your bank statements and bet papers.

He barely looks at you as he says, “Oh there you are, I was starting to think you’d miss the show.”

You sink to your knees.

He looks up at that.

With a tight chest and burning eyes, your dry throat barely permits you to choke out, “Bak-Katsuki, please, please don’t do this. Please don’t fight him.”

He cracks his neck and leans forward, regarding you with dark vermilion eyes. He looks your position over appreciatively before speaking.

“Why not? He’s so good and great isn’t he? I’m just trying to show you how right you were, after all. I’m sure he’s got a fair chance of beating me.”

You shake your head vigorously, knowing what he’s playing at.

“No, no, you’re better, please. I was wrong about him, I shouldn’t have been friends with him, please don’t fight him Katsuki I’ll do anything-“

“-Oh you’ll do anything I say regardless of if I beat him to a bloody pulp or not. You wanna know why?”

You can barely contain a whimper as he stands and walks over right in front of you, his bulging crotch mere inches away from your face.

He suddenly grabs your hair and you cry out before he yanks your head up to meet his cold eyes.

“Because no one in here is gonna say shit to me. I run things here, toots. And if you want your little boy toy to live through today, you’re gonna watch every blow I give to him, and you’re gonna kiss the fucking knuckles I beat his face with. Got that?”

You sob as he grinds his clothed erection against your tear-streaked face, sniffling when he moans loudly and bucks into your open mouth.

A loud knock on the bare hinges stops Bakugo from pulling the front of his shorts down.

You both turn your heads and see a red-faced side-liner looking down and mumbling something about the match starting.

“‘Be there in a minute. Tell the guys to give my girl here a special front-row seat to this match, she’s gonna wanna see her man win, after all.”

The runner scampers off, leaving you both alone.

He bares his teeth down at you and you cower under his painful hold, the roots of your hair ripping from their strands.

He eventually tosses your head to the side after a few seconds of staring you down, and the second he does you clutch your sore cranium.

“I better see you down there in a minute sweet thing. You gotta get used to it anyways, since you’re gonna be getting accustomed to my rituals before and after matches.”

#tw:noncon #bakugo x you #yandere bakugo katsuki #yandere bakugo x reader #bakugo katsuki x reader #katsuki bakugo oneshot #bakugo katsuki #mha #bnha #bnha smut #mha smut #bakugo smut #katsuki smut #katsuki x y/n #katsuki scenario #mha yandere #bnha yandere

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stardustincarnate · 3 years

Text

Dating Light Yagami Would Include :

— assuming you begin dating in high school

— one time he casually asks if you want to go on a date with him. with him being collected as usual he looks as if your answer won't even matter. but honestly he's lowkey panicking on the inside. i mean he really likes you, for years even, so if you were to reject him it would leave him crestfallen

— what does she not like about me i'm everything you wish to have for a boyfriend

— how he asks you to be his girlfriend?

— " [y/n], would you mind? "

— " mind what? "

— " being my girlfriend? "

— can't look at you in the eye. i mean, sure, but for like 2 seconds before he finds the walls suddenly interesting

— wait is that light yagami really sweating?

— boy basically almost stutters you find it amusing and almost chortle

— i mean this boy right here have always been collected so to see him lose a wee bit of his composure is straight-up entertainment

— LIGHT INVENTING THAT “BOYFRIEND VIBES” LOOK

— I MEAN HAVE YOU SEEN HIS WARDROBE

— he's not exactly the biggest fan of PDA especially when you're at school

— school is a place to study not to flirt

— though sometimes he will in the most SUBTLE ways that you don't even realize it

— protective boyfriend check ✔️

— someone catcalling you? he'll look at them in the eye and they'd be dead right on the spot

— you don't want to mess with yagami

— when you two walk together you walk side by side. occasionally holding hands but if not then at a really close proximity

— though he likes it too if he were to walk behind you real close just so he can watch over you from the back

— feeling down?

— " it's okay to let it out [y/n]. i'm here to listen, okay? "

— forehead kisses 🥺

— gives the BEST advices like oh gosh where does he get all that stuff from and how much has he actually experienced in life???

— and he's sort of like a mom friend actually

— not the biggest fan of small talks. well, sure, sometimes it helps him. but often it wears him out and he doesn't really get the point of why he and the other party should be talking about something that isn't conducive in any way

— being good at socializing doesn't mean he always enjoys it

— some peeps honestly wear him out tsk

— he's the type of person who looks deeply into stuff that has your brain turning its wheels at 3a.m. so if you're that type of person too then he'd be more than happy to discuss it with you and he'd be so in love ugh

— i mean he doesn't sleep at 3a.m. because that definitely is very much unhealthy but you get the picture

— though sometimes he has trouble sleeping because of overthinking

— he won't admit but it really helps if he can talk about it with you before the day ends

— you two often debate lightly but at some point it gets a wee bit serious

— but no one gets mad ofc it actually clears both your minds and gives you new perspectives

— if you're that person who asks someone else for homework answers then i'm sorry but light says N O

— he loves you, really

— but please learn to do it yourself

— he will help you understand the lesson if you had trouble doing so but it only goes that far

— oh AND I CAN TOTALLY SEE HIM HAVING A STUDY SESSION WITH HIS S/O <3333

— IT HAPPENS OFTEN

— AND IT'S ACTUALLY VERY RELAXING

— just there in the silence enjoying each other's company while reading

— either in his room, yours, or in a small coffee shop that's barely visited by anyone

— classrooms can work too only if the other students had already left

— also when he's really really bored he picks up the most random things he can see

— coughs the notebook coughs

— then proceeds to stare at them for like five minutes straight

— " why is he staring at a pencil like that— "

— " i think he's about to make-out with it "

— don't disturb him he's somehow managed to get lost deep in thought and if you dare interrupt it's adios for you

— when he stumbles upon the death note, he contemplates about telling you about it but thinks better and decides to keep silent at first

— but once he's sure that the notebook isn't just some kind of prank he gravely swears to himself that he'll never tell you about it

— he's not himself for the next few days because he. just. killed. a. bloody. person. and has a shinigami wandering by his side how. messed. up. is. that.

— and when you ask him what's the matter, he'll just look at you—look away—then shake his head

— because of his pride shyness he will not ask you to comfort him

— but when you do he'll just close his eyes, sigh, and indulge himself in that very moment

— then he'll whisper a barely audible " i love you "

— and he MEANS it

— once he recovers from the shock and knows just what to do with that bloody notebook a point where he has to break up with you will come

— the thought will pain him at first, but he's got to

— which is probably for the best because if you were to stick with him any longer he'd eventually kill you since he says you're not a very useful piece on his chessboard

— but that happens only if he survives

— in which case he doesn't

— well. . . moving on

— in conclusion, he's that type of bf who shows his love for you subtly. he respects your personal space because he has his own too. and he knows that although you two are in a relationship there are other things that require your attention more. being in a relationship does not mean smooching nearly every second of the day. love can come in many forms.

— please distract him so he doesn't find the notebook i just want my cinnamon roll back

#Light Yagami #light yagami x reader #Death Note #death note x reader #death note imagines #light x reader #light yagami imagine #death note imagine #death note x you #dating headcanons #light yagami headcanons #Death note headcanons #death note fluff

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iwadori · 3 years

Note

hii i saw ur taking requests and I wanted to ask if you could do a fic with the miya twins,suna and iwa comforting their s/o after they have a dream of them cheating on her? tysm!

Cheating Misunderstandings with the haikyu boys (Osamu,Atsumu)

Word Count:1.8K

Genre:angst,fluff

masterlist

AN: This was kind of on the lines of what you wanted, but I hope you enjoy it. Also you guys will see an ‘Empress appearance’ in this work....so don’t kill me.

Osamu:

You were walking to miya onigiri ready to pick up Samu to go home

But when you got to the front door you see Osamu in the shop winding touching another girl

You couldn’t see the girl or Osamu properly because of the angle you were at

But you wouldn’t say your eyes were decieving you, so you did what you should do turn on your heel and get out of there.

You were back at your apartment and you were fuming, you were at your desk and decided that distracting yourself with your mountainous amount of paperwork that you had for your job would be better than sitting down and stewing over watching your boyfriend cheat on you.

‘How long has this been going on,’ you thought to yourself ‘Who even is she? She can’t be a worker’ since you knew everyone that worked there and the manager Empress would definitely not let a worker get with Osamu since you were besties after all.

Distracting yourself, obviously didn’t work and you sent yourself into a spiral of social stalking, trying to find this girl. Which didn’t work, as you only saw her hair and her height which was around a foot shorter than Osamu’s. ‘Stupid Osamu’ you thought, how could he do this? Why would you do this?

You wanted to cry, you were going to cry. Outside you heard a car door shut, and looking out your window you saw Osamu walking out the car with his keys in his mouth and bags (presumably food) in his hand.

You heard some knocking, well kicking at your front door and a light shout of “Babe, can you open the door my arms our pretty full here.” You didn’t answer, you didn’t even move cause you knew if you saw his face it’ll most likely be him saying ‘Y/N im sorry, but theres someone else’ the thought alone made you cringe. You were knocked out of your thoughts with again the kicking of the door and Osamu saying with a laugh “C’mon babe all you really gonna leave a guy stranded out here, ive got your favourite too and its going to get cold”

You reluctantly opened the door, not actually greeting Osamu and just going back to your room to pack away your paper work and close your laptop. To your surprise Osamu was behind you and gave you a quick kiss to your cheek, which you would usually smile and ease into but today you cringed and quickly moved. Making Osamu look at you with a side eye.

By time he was setteled in you were sitting down at the dinner table eating, with the sound of Gordon Ramsey’s Hell Kitchen filling your awkward silence. Osamu did try to speak to you but you always just responded with “yeah,” “sure,” or “maybe.” Short simple answers that Osamu definitely didn’t like.

When dinner was over and it was the time when you two usually watched a shitty reality tv show together, you decided to go to bed early to avoid any more awkward conversation with Osamu. But before you could clamber into bed, Osamu grabs your arm saying “Y/N, what’s wrong with you?”

“What do you mean Samu?” you say with a forced smile on your face even though he couldn’t see it, you just did so he didn’t see you start to tear up “nothing’s wrong with me.”

“Are you Y/N?”

“mhm” you murmured trying to shrug off his hold, you sniffled a bit (attempting to do it quietly) but he heard it.

“No y/n, what’s wrong can’t you just turn around.” The force of you pulling away and he pulling you close, left you falling onto your bed and the tears just started to fall. Osamu immediately crouched down to your eye line “whats wrong love?” he said with a tender voice.

You shook your head in response, “what’s wrong?? Please tell me Y/N.”

“Why would you do that to me?” you say your voice breaking as the tears streamed your face. Osamu started to panick seeing you cry.

“Do what Y/N, what do you mean?”

“You cheated on me? Was I not enough for you? Don’t you love me anymore.”

“Who Y/N!Who.?”

“You touched her, I saw you. I can’t believe you would do that. In public as well” you accused “How could you do that to me.”

“Y/N, baby listen I don’t know what you mean?”

“Don’t call me that Miya, you’re such a fucking liar oh my god.”

“Can you please explain to me what you’re talking about?”

“You. In the shop. I saw you, touching her” you say scowling saying the last line as if It was poisonous.

“In the shop? What do you-” a spark flashed in Osamus eyes before he stood up and started pulling you out the room “You need to come with me.”

“Miya, what are you doing? I’m not going anywhere with you.” you groaned

“Yes you are, and stopped calling me that.”

He dragged you outside to his car and opened the door for you, standing expectedly waiting for you to get in. “Im not getting in,” you say folding your arms

“Oh yes you are. Just get in the car.”

“But im in my roblox pyjamas” you groaned again feeling like a child.

“And you still hot babe don’t worry” he said winking at you ushering you into the car “Just get in it’ll be a quick ride anyways.”

You pulled outside of onigiri miya and Osamu begin to drag you out again taken you to the office where the security cameras are. He did something on the community and pulled up a date and time which was the time you were at the store earlier.

Playing on the screen was the recording and the incident which you saw before, but this one was a differnet angle. You saw a girl walking one way and Osamu walking the over with a drink in his hand, him spilling the drink on her and cleaning her off with a paper towel. Which you thought was him groping and touching her.

Your cheeks heated up hard in embarrasment, as you realised how you acted and how you got it all wrong. You saw Osamu with a glint in his eye and smirk on his face and before he could say anything you said “Dont. Let’s get back to the car.”

All was forgotten on your car ride home and you decided to discuss eachothers days (skipping out the ‘cheating’ part.) However after you watched you shows and finally gotten into bed, when Osamu was holding you right against his chest (so close where you could hear his heartbeat) he said, “Y/N, although we agreed to not talk about this incident...even though I will definitely be telling Empress, I just want to let you know that I will never even think about cheating on you let alone actually doing it, I love you so much that the idea of cheating is so uncomprehendable I don’t even want to think about it.”

“Love you ‘Samu, and I'm sorry for making this into a big old thing when I could’ve just asked you about it.” you say in response

“It’s okay babe,” he said kissing your forehead “It’s okay.”

Atsumu

You and Atsumu have been dating fairly recently meeting in your through your friend Empress who was the manager at Atsumu’s brother Osamu’s shop Onigiri Miya.

You’ve only been together 6 months and you’re ready to tell him that you love him

However you being the perfectionist that you are, wanted it to be perfect so of course you had to practice on friend, Empress’ boyfriend Hajime.

“Okay so go.”

“Atsumu, I think you’re a stand-up guy and you’re pretty cute can I love ya.” you said punching Iwa on the arm.

“Y/N, you can’t say that.” Empress said face palming.

“Okay, Atsumu I’ve fallen for you and I can’t get up?”

“No dad jokes Y/N.” Hajime said shaking his head

“Why theyre soo funny, what about Atsumu you’re a pain in my ass.” you said winking at Empress.

“Gosh Y/N! Take this seriously for once.” Hajime said blushing at your obvious innuendo.

“Well how did you two confess you undying love to eachother?” you asked and smiled at both their reactions, knowing that they definitely haven’t done that.

“Just say your confession Y/N,” Empress said rolling her eyes

“Okay Atsumu,” you said taking a deep breath “Ever since I met you after your brother spilt a drink on me at his shop and you tried to cheer me up with your terrible jokes I knew that you were the one for me. I love your passion, your drive your determination to make me feel better all the time even when I don’t need you too. I love being with you and I...”

Hajime looked at you expectedly, “I love you,” you said smiling “There I said it I love you!”

“Oh my gosh Y/N! That was so cute you should definitely sa-”

“What the fuck Y/N!” exclaimed a voice next to you “You love this clown.”

“Who are you calling a clown,” said Iwa squaring up to Atsumu making both you and Empress roll your eyes at the heeping testoterone filling the area.

“Haji let’s go,” said Empress dragging her boyfriend away “and Y/N I'm pretty sure you two need to talk.”

When Hajime and Empress were an ear shot away, Atsumu looked at you with a glare. “So Y/N, is this what you’re doing now slu-”

“Don’t even go there ‘tsumu, you’re such an ass sometimes.” You say walking away “And by the way I was practicing with Iwa to say I fucking love you, you asshole.”

You already stormed off before Atsumu yelled, “Wait! You love me?”

“Of course I do you ass.” you say scowling.

Atsumu jogs over to you and says, “I love you too Y/N” he picks you up and tosses you about in the air, practically doing sommersaults, “Im so happy! Wait till I tell Osamu bout this he’s probably hasn’t told his girlfriend about this.”

“Babe, they’ve been dating for years” You said with a laugh “But go ahead ‘tsumu tell the world.”

“I’m sorry for misunderstanding things.”

“And...?”

“And I'm sorry for calling Iwa a clown, knowing he would definitely beat my ass.”

“And..?”

“And I'm sorry for being an ass.” he said with his head down.

“You are an ass Atsumu,” you said with a smile “But you’re my favourite pain in the ass.” You said winking at him making him burst out with laughter at your stupid innuedo.

Whenever Atsumu sees Osamu he tells him about how much you both love eachother, which always leads them into an argument about who has the better girlfriend and who loves their girlfriend more which always has you laughing.

AN: do you guys see the connection between the two?? Cause if you see the connection I’LL LOVE YOU FOREVER :3 Hope you guys enjoyed it, what do you guys think?

#haikyuu x reader comfort #haikyu angst #haikyuu fluff #haikyu x reader #haikyu scenarios #haikyu headcanons #haikyu #osamu and atsumu #atsumu headcanons #atsumu x female reader #atsumu x reader #osamu scenarios #osamu x reader #atsumu angst #atsumu fluff #atsumu scenarios #signedwithane😌

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dodo-begone · 3 years

Text

When you Wish Upon a Star

Pairing: Karlnapity x Reader

Request: Can you maybe write some poly karlnapity x reader fluff with a bit of angst?

Word count: 1.7k

Warning: memory loss, angst, cursing, loss/relationship strain, depression (?)

A/n: haha memory issues go brrrrrr. Sorry if it's bad, i wanted angst but didn't know how-

Your world was slowly becoming a monochrome film. So meaningless and alien to what your life once was. All color and life had left and all that remained was an empty shell of what once was. Your boys were no longer sticking together, acting like the loving couple that they are. Or were. You couldn’t tell what the status of y’all relationship was. It felt like everything was falling apart. Nobody was communicating with each other and they weren’t coming home sometimes, going missing for days on end with no contact.

Now sometimes business could be rough and long, so that wasn’t an abnormal thing. No, the issue was how increasingly common this “uncommon” occurrence was. Anxiety boiled in your chest with every night that passed without your lovers. Cuddling with just one wasn’t the same as with them all. You just wished everything would return to its original state; all four of your being a giddy and affectionate couple. Back to that honeymoon stage.

Everything was becoming so different, much less vibrant. Like a depression had fallen onto y’alls happily-ever-after. You only had Sapnap for comfort, and vice versa. There was no Quackity to rely on or Karl to giggle all the worries all away. And it was painfully obvious how it was affecting everybody, yet nobody did anything to fix it.

Quackity never came to y’all for comfort. He was always at his damn casino or scheming a way to end Techno’s anarchy. Slowly he just stopped talking to y’all like he loved you. Now you and Sapnap were like a war council, but even then he wouldn’t listen to y’all advice. He’d just rant to y’all about how much he despised Techno and wanted to kill him, destroy the damn god complex the man had.

But Quackity was blind to himself; he was on a high horse and saw himself as a worthy opponent, somebody who could subdue such a savage beast. Every time Quackity came home bloody and on the brink of death, it killed you on the inside. Why wasn’t he coming to y’all about the issues? Why did he think he was so alone in his endeavor?

And you didn’t even want to mention Karl’s condition. He was acting so odd now. More forgetful and aloof. It was like he was a complete stranger now. Your interactions were slowly becoming shorter and shorter, less meaningful and shallow. From meaningful, deep and loving talk during cuddle sessions to a curt, cold and disconnected. Sapnap even tried to get information out of him, but he stayed closed and guarded like a clam. Then he’d also come home with some injuries, but there was never an explanation for why he got hurt. Quackity at least admitted to what happened, so you knew what possible dangers he was facing. But Karl? He was an absolute mystery now.

Karl wasn’t the type of person to be so mysterious. Well, cold and mysterious that is. Definitely a mystery though, but so charismatic that you could easily push that fact aside. He used to be so cute and “unsuspecting”. Now that’s the same case, but subtract the “cute and unsuspecting” part. His newfound apathy worried you to no end. It was like he was completely detached from reality.

It was such a silly thing, but you wished for the stars, asking them to help you. Please, you needed your boys back. You didn’t know how much longer you could keep living through this cycle.

Quackity’s hyper-independence and Karl’s now apathetic attitude was disheartening. And the effect it had on Sapnap was heartbreaking. He kept blaming himself for the relationship for falling apart. You reassured him that it wasn’t his fault, but you were hypocritical. Telling someone that it wasn’t their fault that a relationship was failing yet blaming oneself for the same thing? Honestly it wasn’t just one singular person’s fault; everyone was to blame. Nobody was communicating, which harmed the relationship you once thrived in.

So you begged the stars for guidance, for a chance at mending your dying relationship. There wasn’t a way you could live without your lovers.

You should’ve been more careful for what you wished for.

________________________________________________

Sapnap commed you one day, which wasn’t abnormal by any means. You two talked throughout the day multiple times. That was the only consistent thing that was still steady. A constant in your ever changing lives. But when you got on call with him, he sounded different, desperate and panicked. Your anxiety started to peak when he spoke, but the subject of the call made time stop. No way- there was no way.

You fucking chunked whatever the hell you were holding or doing out of your hands. It was way less important now. Honestly you can’t even remember what you were doing. All you knew was that you had to get to them and swiftly. No time could be wasted. Sapnap needed you right now. Your boys needed you. Everything was on the line. Well, for you it felt like that. Your boys were your everything; if one more “unfortunate” accident occurred to them, you wouldn’t know what to do with yourself. You were absolutely failing at protecting them. They protected and loved you for so long, and you wanted to protect them now.

Sapnap had begged, nearly demanding you come to Karl’s library that instant. Karl had apparently appeared there, and he wasn’t looking so good. He said he also contacted Quackity so he should be there too, but who knows if he’ll actually be there.

When the library came into sight, your anxiety both increased yet decreased, allowing joy to grow alongside it. The combination was odd, one that sounds like it shouldn’t be put together. Yet that’s exactly what you felt; bitterness and cold with some warmth hidden beneath the surface like a sun chasing the night way at dawn. You bolted into the building, frantically sweeping the immediate area for Sapnap and Karl. No sign of them. Your panic grew exponentially. Where were they? You yelled out, hoping to hear any sign of them.

Some commotion was made from your left. Walking closer to it, you caught sight of Sapnap’s shoes. He peaked around the corner to check the new visitor, and almost ran to you. The moment he stood, he hesitated. He took a step forward and stopped, looking between you and where you presumed Karl was. Ultimately he just took a few more steps toward you before turning back to Karl. When you arrived at Sapnap’s side, you dropped to your knees alongside him. There one of your worst fears faced you.

Karl lay on the ground, unconscious and bloody. He was so pale, it scared you. How long was he like this? What happened to him? Would he make it? You didn’t want to know the answer to it. Specifically, you didn’t want to know in case he wasn’t going to make it. Seeing him like this, it’d hurt too much to know the reality. You just wanted your old picture-perfect life back. Yes, it wasn’t absolutely perfect, but it was perfect for you and your boys.

So much time must’ve passed with you and Sapnap just watching Karl, tending to the wounds he had. It was fortunate that only his head showed clear signs of damage. Yet that was also a very unfortunate thing. There could be so much potential damage done and you’d never know if he was or wasn’t okay unless something happened to him.

You were so focused on Karl that you hadn’t realized that Quackity had joined y’all until he gently laid his hand on your shoulder, which shocked you out of your trance. Quackity’s eyes and face were red and puffy, tears trailed down his face and he was out of breath and panting. But he was here. You jumped up to hug him, pulling him down to the ground with you, Sapnap and Karl. Sapnap joined in the hug without a word. A sniffle left Sapnap, but you never mentioned it. This was a very stressful situation.

After a short period of pseudo peace, the exhaustion finally started to take ahold of y’all with the adrenaline slowly leaving your systems. Talking it out for a bit, after seeing how visibly tired everyone was, it was decided that y’all would watch over him in shifts. There was a small squabble for who’d be first; each of you wanted to be first to sate your guilt. It wasn’t long until a victor was declared; Quackity would take the first shift. Then Sapnap and finally you. The plan fucking pissed you off so much and there wasn’t a reason for it to. It just did, and you couldn’t pinpoint what it was. But you didn’t question it. If conflict could be avoided, then it’d be best to go along with the plan.

One moment you were blinking, trying to fight off sleep and the next Quackity was shaking you awake. You were so groggy and barely heard what he said. It must’ve been so obvious to Quackity that you just weren’t hearing jack shit, but he kept repeating- something. You actually had no clue if he was repeating something or just babbling. All you heard was noise and his mouth was moving. What could be so important that he was just fucking shaking you like a damn earthquake- oH SHIT!

Without a second thought, you jump to your feet and flop just a bit closer to Karl. You got up too quickly but you made it to your goal, kinda, so score! Scrambling to your feet, more accurately your knees, you view the situation.

All you could see was Karl sitting up and talking to Sapnap. That’s all that mattered though- he was alright. Karl was alive and thriving- okay that was debatable- but still! Your Karl was okay!

You’re on your feet in a flash once again, flinging yourself into Karl’s arms. The relief that washed over you was immense. Cleansing you of all your anxieties.

Yet he didn’t hug you back. Matter of fact, he did nothing at all. He froze up. Though it went unnoticed by you. Salty tears dripped down your face and splattered onto his jacket. Quackity joined in on your group hug, cry and babbling his apologies along the way.

Suddenly you and Quakity are shoved away, landing into Sapnap’s waiting arms. Saying you were shocked would be an understatement. Confused also couldn’t, yet they were the first words your frazzled mind could conjure.

“Who are you all?”

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theangstyboiblog · 3 years

Text

In the End Pt. 1 |Crosshair x Reader

Description: You and the Bad Batch went back to Kamino for Crosshair. The battle was long and hard. Now, back on the Marauder, all there is to do is wait for him to wake up.

A/N: I had to split the end of this fic into two because it was getting long and just gah it can't end this sad. Look for the final (I mean it this time) part sometime soon!

WORDCOUNT: 3,178

It’s been hours since you left Kamino’s main base in ruins. Hours since the resulting explosions left your ears ringing. Hours since you last saw him open his eyes.

“He’s gonna be okay, Commander,” Wrecker says behind you, quiet and reserved. You swallow as you look away from Cross for just a moment to nod to his brother.

“I know,” you murmur, before turn back to the man sleeping on the bed. You’re sat beside him, your fingers tracing unknown shapes on the back of his hand. A bandage is taped to the side of his head, a sight you never thought you’d be happy to see. But what it symbolizes is the important piece. He’s free. You’re free. The both of you are alive and you’re going to make it.

Wiping your nose on your sleeve, you smile as you squeeze his hand for the hundredth time all evening.

Eventually, the rest of the squad leaves you two alone, though you can feel that they’re not too far away. Echo and Tech are down the hall. Wrecker took Omega to her bunk once she’d fallen asleep in the corner of the med-bay. He’s still with her, and you bask in the calm happiness coming off him in waves, a feeling you haven’t felt from any of the men for months. Hunter is right outside the door, and even though you’ve told him you know he’s there, he insists that he's fine where he is.

Cross hasn’t moved. His armor is piled in the corner, no weapons in reach (Hunter’s idea). A quick glance over him, tells you he’s thinner than the last time you saw him. His burns are healed, the benefits of bacta and Kaminoan medicine. But his lip is busted. His right eye is swollen where Wrecker punched him. A gash mars his chin where he hit the floor. He looks broken and a part of you is afraid --- no it knows, that everything isn’t fixed yet. It might never be fixed. All you can do is hope and stay with him so he knows he’s not alone anymore.

“Rest as long as you need, Cross, please,” you whisper as you caress his cheek. “Sleep, because it’s going to be hard when you wake up. I know you. You like to take the blame, but it’s not your fault.” Your thumb traces an old scar over his temple as you lean over him, your nose just inches away from his. “I love you and I’m waiting so take your time.”

Keeping hold of his hand, you slide off the edge of the bed and turn around, pulling a chair to you with a wave of your fingers. You settle back, thumb caressing his knuckles and watch over him, a silent happiness growing in your chest as you slowly fall asleep, his hand still in yours.

~~~~~~

You wake up at the sound of your name. Flinching, you set shake yourself awake as you look around the med-bay trying to find your bearings. Ceiling, floor, bed. You stand up as you realize Cross has his hands pressing to his temples as his head turns back and forth.

“Y/N,” he croaks your name as you pull his hands away, scare he’s going to reopen the wounds on his face.

“I’m here,” you tell him. His eyes are still closed but he turns towards the sound of your voice, breath shallow, voice a whisper.

“You’re dead,” he says, and you shake your head, tears brimming as you caress his cheek.

“No, I’m right here, Cross. I’m here, I’m alright.” You pull his hands down to his chest as he turns away, blindly trying to push you away. His eyes begin to flitter open and you hold your breath as he stills for a moment, searching the room before turning his gaze on you. You smile because it’s either a smile or a full-on sob-fest as your chest seizes up and you can’t breathe. “I’m here,” you tell him again as the tears begin to fall despite the smile.

His eyes fall to your hands and you loosen your hold as he sits up, letting his legs swing off the side of the bed. He shakes his head, eyes downcast and you try to ignore the pain you can feel coming off of him. But it’s growing. Bending your knees, you peer up at him, before raising a hand to cup his cheek. His pain turns to anger.

“Don’t,” he says, slapping your hand away.

You drop the hand. “Cross, I---”

He shoves you away from him, and you knock back into the chair behind you. “J-just go away,” he tells you. You take a deep breath. You don’t move. And then he’s on his feet, throwing his hands up, raising his voice. “I said, ‘Go away,’” he tells you and you catch him by the shoulders trying to guide him back to the bed as the door opens and Hunter rushes in.

“Cross, you’re going to hurt yourself,” you tell him as he wrestles with you.

But he’s not listening. “Get out,” he yells in your face, turning as Hunter catches him, slipping in between the two of you. “Get out of here, I don’t want to see you,” he yells as Echo and Tech join the room. Tech joins Hunter. Echo catches you by the shoulder.

You look back as Hunter has Cross on the bed, Tech readying a vial and syringe as Cross glares at you, yelling at the top of his voice for you to leave, to go away, to get out.

“I don’t want to see them! Get them out!” Cross continues to shout, voice louder than you’ve ever heard it before.

“Echo!” Hunter says, shooting the two of you a look, when you step towards the bed.

“Y/N, let’s give them the room,” Echo says behind you, pulling you back with him. “Let them help him,” he says as you try to push him off you. And that breaks you. Let them help. Because you can’t. You’re hurting him. Just the sight of you is hurting him. You turn away as Tech brings the syringe to Crosshair’s neck a hiss sounding as the shot finds its mark. The shouting dies down as you walk through the door, but you can still hear him, saying your name.

“Y/n. Don’t want them. Don’t want to see, Y/N. Don’t want them…”

It’s only when you’re in the hall, when the doors have closed, and you can’t see or hear him anymore that you break down. Your knees give out, a wave of nausea washes over you and it feels like a thousand pounds is driving you to the floor. A hand squeezes your shoulder and you turn to the side, sobbing into Echo’s shoulder. He says nothing as you curl up against the wall waiting for whatever happens next because you’re not sure it can get any worse.

~~~~~~

It’s been a week. The crew is starting to find a new rhythm going about their days. Echo and Tech find new projects to busy themselves with. Wrecker and Omega practice disarming and rearming various modes of explosives. Hunter tries his best to keep everyone moving, tries to keep everyone busy, but there’s a void. You’ve kept yourself to the lower deck as much as possible. Kept to yourself as much as possible.

Cross refuses to see you, speak to you, listen to you.

You’ve tried, several times but they’ve each ended in silence or in bitter words hurled towards you like a shot from a rifle. He doesn’t want to see you. Your mere presence sets him off, and the others have had to step in a few times when he’s gotten in your face, telling you to leave and never come back.

You almost want to laugh at how naive you had been. There were nights, long before you got him back that you imagined how this would go. You’d thought he’d be happy to see you, to be with you. That he would hold you, tell you he loves you. That he’d make impossible promises: that he’d never leave you, never let anything hurt you. The kind of promises you knew no one could keep, but that showed just how much he loved you, needed you, wanted you, had to have you. You knew there’d be tears and that he’d be slow to forgive himself but this---

This is killing you. And you don’t know how much more you can take.

Wiping your face on your sleeve you look down at your lightsaber as you finish replacing the energy source, a few tweaks here and there to fix the balance. Footsteps softly pad down the stairwell behind you.

“Hunter,” you say, without looking.

The footsteps stop. “It’s creepy how you do that,” he says before moving to lean on the wall next to you.

“You can do it too,” you point out.

“Yeah, but it’s weird knowing someone else does it too.”

Tightening the screws on the side of the hilt, you drop your tools into the kit and turn to him. “Something you needed?” you asked .

“We’re going to have to set down at a colony for supplies and spare parts,” he tells you. “I was going to take everyone into town to give them a break, give them time to relax, stretch their legs.”

“Thanks, Hunter,” you tell him, shaking your head. “But I’m fine.”

He smiles and tilts his head. “Actually… I was hoping you’d stay behind,” he says. “With Crosshair.”

Your cheek twitches as the sound of his name. You sniff then clear your throat. “Sure,” you say with a nod. “I can stay down here out of his way unless he needs something.”

Hunter sighs, as you stand up and cross the room to stow your gear. “Y/N, I don’t want to tell you what to do, but I think you should talk to him.”

“He wanted space, and I’m giving it to him,” you shoot back as you slam the lid to your lock box closed a little too harshly.

“He isn’t sleeping, eating. I don’t know how much more his body can take.”

“Would’ve thought you’d be telling me not to bother him,” you murmured. “I’ll just upset him more,” you finish, turning around and crossing your arms.

Hunter sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He dropped his hand and shook his head, before heading back towards the stairs. He began to climb before twisting back around. “He needs you. Even if he’s saying the opposite. Don’t let him push you away.”

Without another word, he disappeared up the stairs, leaving you alone once again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You’ve been staring at the door for twenty minutes. The ship is silent and still. The others left an hour ago. No one has come in or out of the room ahead of you since you first leaned against the wall opposite. You don’t know what you’re doing. Waiting? Readying yourself for the yelling, the fear and pain that will fill the room when he sees you.

You could stay here and never go in. You feel weak. Helpless. Ashamed. How can you help someone who descends into terror the moment they look at you? How can you help them when you can feel what they feel?

Wiping your nose, you push off the wall and step towards the door. You don’t knock. The door slides open, revealing low lights. At first glance you might think the room is empty. Until you look in the corner, shadow standing at a workbench, tinkering with something you can’t quite see. It’s not a gun. You know Hunter locked them all away days ago, just in case.

You want to walk right over, slip your arms round his waist and peer over his shoulder at his work. That’s what the old you would have done. But this isn’t the Cross you knew. Not completely. Licking your lips you clear your throat.

“Hello,” you murmur. His hands stop working, and his head tilts. But he doesn’t turn to look at you.

“I thought you’d left,” he breathes as he leans against the table, and you take a deep breath at the sound of his voice. He’s hoarse. His shoulders look tense as he drops his head to stare down at the countertop. “I wish you’d leave.”

“Why?” you ask, your voice cutting through the room. Cross turns around and you level your gaze, trying not to startle at the sight of him. He looks like hell. He’s pale, his hair is a mess, there are bags under his eyes. He looks like he hasn’t slept. You know he’s doing the same analyzation of you as he studies you. You wonder what he sees. You swallow then ask again, “Why do you want me to leave?”

“What does it matter?” he turns around his voice deepening, breaking as he takes breath. “Just go.”

You step forward, skirting around the edge of the room. The distance between you never closes as you give him space. You’re only moving to see him more.

“Tell me why,” you say after enduring a few minutes of him ignoring you, “and I’ll leave.”

His head turns sharply. “I don’t…” his eyes search the floor as he tries to reason through his feelings, “I don’t need a reason. You’re just clinging to something you used to have, Commander.” He spits out your title with a glare trained on the floor and turns back in his seat. “Now get out,” he whispers.

His words sting, but you don’t leave. Even if he had given you 100 reasons for why he never wanted to see you again, you were never going to leave. You lied. You stare at him and you feel guilty as you step forward, each step taking you closer and closer to him. He stares at you wide-eyed as you approach. He steps back as you come closer, close enough to touch him and you’re still not stopping.

“What’re you doing?” he asks as you raise your hands. He slaps one away, but you have him trapped between the table and the wall and you.

You can’t slow yourself down anymore. You rise up and slip your arms around his neck, pulling him close, setting your chin on his shoulder. He’s frozen, hands frozen against your stomach where they had tried to push you back.

His voice turns to begging. “Please,” he whispers. “Please go.”

You shake your head, burying your face in his neck, breathing him in. “No,” you tell him. “I’m not leaving. Even if you hate me for it, I can’t.”

He’s uncomfortably frozen against you, but you ignore it holding him tight, refusing to let go even if he’s only going to let you hold on for a few more seconds. You’ll take them, all of them and make them yours. He is yours. Even if right now it feels like he’s a million miles away. You wish you could see his face, but to do so would mean loosening your grip. You refuse.

Slowly, after who knows how long, his hands fall, timid and unsure to your waist. You flinch at the feeling. A soft, warm breath falls across your temple, a nose nuzzles against your hair. A shuddering sigh quakes through his shoulders. His muscles loosen and he’s holding you. Breathing you in, feeling your body’s heat against his. You don’t say anything. You still maintain your grip.

“I will never hate you,” a voice whispers next to your ear.

You freeze. He whispers your name, one hand running up and down your back. Hesitantly, loosen your hold and lean back just enough to see him staring down at you. His gaze is broken, for the first time taking you in. Tears slide down his cheeks and he clicks his tongue, reaching up to wipe them away. Your fingers join his as your own tears begin to build. He catches your hand, fingers tangling with yours as he shakes his head and looks away.

“Cross, let me help you,” you tell him. “I love you so much---"

“But I hurt people,” he whispers, cutting you off. “I hurt you. I-I almost killed you.” He turns back to face you, pressing his brow against your own. “You fell and I wanted to die so it would all be over.”

“But you didn’t.”

“Only because that thing in my head wouldn’t let me.”

You take a deep breath, looking down as you start to cry at the thought. “I’m so sorry, Cross.”

“Out of the two of us, you have nothing to be sorry for Y/N,” he says.

You look up at him. “Please,” you set your hands on his chest. “Please don’t blame yourself anymore. It wasn’t you, it wasn’t your fault.”

He looks at you sadly, as he lets his arms fall away from you. He stands a bit taller as though he’s reporting to an officer. “My hands…”

You grab them. “Are here now, with me. No one is going to use you like that again. I won’t let them hurt you.” You bring his hand up to your face, setting his palm to your cheek. His fingers are cold as he scans your eyes. “Things will be better now.”

“What if they aren’t?”

You cupped his face in your hands, forcing him to look at you. “We will make them better. For you. For us.” He looks at you sadly, as though he’s about to have explain to a child how the universe really works.

“Y/N…”

“I want to be with you, Cross,” you tell him firmly, “that’s all I have ever wanted. I’ll do anything.”

Cross turned his gaze to the far wall, for a moment as you feel silent, your eyes scanning his face, looking for any hint of what he was feeling. He breathed in, and out in an off-beat rhythm. He blinked quickly as his brow furrowed.

“I feel broken, Y/N.”

“Then we’ll find away to mend that,” you tell him and he lets out a harsh laugh, coming back to you, his eyes finding yours and for a second, you see the old him, the old him that would throw out a snarky comment.

“I don’t know that anyone can fix me.”

You lean forward, slipping your arms around his back, pressing your face into his shoulder as you hide a fresh wave of tears. You’ve cried so much, you can’t stand for him to see you cry more. A sob rushes through you as his arms fall into their natural place around him, pulling you closer to him as his own shoulders shake. You listen to him breathe, listen to his heartbeat, sounds you weren’t sure you’d ever get to hear again. And in the corner of the room with the lights flickering above, you whisper one last thing to him before turning to hold each other in silence.

“Let me try.”

In the End pt. 2 | Series Finale

#crosshair x reader #crosshair #tbb #the bad batch #tbb fic #angst #romance #tbb hunter

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