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kaiandels · 9 months

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Two Hearts (finale): e.w x reader

warnings: none! calm chapter completely wholesome but kind of short ig?

writer’s note: this will be the last chapter. this is not intense so do not expect anything !! and sorry if it took so long.. when i say i’m busy with uni, i am. NOT PROOFREAD!

part 1- part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7

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Love is a confusing thing. Not everyone is blessed enough to feel this concept. You have always thought that you were incapable of doing so, that you weren't worthy. 'Cause all you felt in this life that you have lived was nothing but rejection which made you dense to the feeling of Love. And you knew, that Ellie was the same. You both were looking for the same thing. And it felt so good that you both were able to provide it for each other.

"In this life I have done nothing but love you." Ellie whispered.

The denial that was evident throughout was just a decoy for the intense love that couldn't be displayed. You both were cowards. You didn't accept the risk of losing someone who you spent your whole life with just because you loved them more than a friend should love another. Love is a confusing thing. You hoped to God that it would change for the better.

It did. It seemed like the whole world revolved around you and her only. You were deprived of love, Ellie knew that. Ever since you were a child you have done nothing but try to get the constant approval of your parents. You had done nothing but try to achieve the academic goals or even the career goals for no one but them and them only. The love that was lacking throughout your life, was provided by Ellie. And the love that was lacking through hers, were provided by you.

You were going to meet up with Joel, you had just put on something casual as the planned set-up would only be in a café. You decided to not outdone yourselves because you wanted the ambiance to be just perfect to announce you and Ellie’s relationship. To be completely honest, you were a nervous wreck. And Ellie didn’t seem to get that at all. But, the things that ran through your mind was just “what if he doesn’t like me for Ellie?” or “what if he thinks that i’m too full of myself?”

You gulped as you blankly stared at the mirror, your gaze travelling up and down your body as you were so unsure of how presentable you wanted to be. “You’re fine.” Ellie broke the silence as she stood behind you, her arms crossed. “Why are you so nervous? You’ve been with Joel ever since we were 5.” Ellie asked as she looked at you in to the mirror. “I don’t know. What if he doesn’t like me for you? I mean I wasn’t the best child at all, he always scolded me when we would play in the backyard and- what if hejustdoesntlikemeforyoubecauseimnotthegirlwhoheseesyouwith?” You rambled as your hands went their ways through the air as Ellie stared at you dumbfoundedly. Is that even a word? It’s probably possible ‘cause that’s the way Ellie’s feeling right now.

“You’re doing too much, seriously.” Ellie laughed as she stepped closer to you to hug you from behind. “You’re going to be okay. Like I said, you’ve known him your whole life.” You sighed at the reassurance as you melted under her embrace. You nodded as you accepted your “faith”.

A few hours later, you and Ellie had arrived to the café. You both got out the car, laughing as you both noticed that your breaths both hitched. You looked at eachother as Ellie pointed at the window, you followed her direction and saw Joel sitting quietly at the booth, reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. He never changed. You thought.

You and Ellie walked in the café hand in hand as you both walked up to Joel. “Hey..” Ellie said almost whispering as she caught Joel’s attention. “Hey kiddo. Oh have I missed ya.” Joel claimed giving Ellie an excited shit-eating grin. He stood up as he gave Ellie a tight hug, ruffling her hair in the process. “Fuck- JOEL!” Ellie groaned as they both laughed.

You stood there, admiring the two as your heart melted. You wished that you could feel like that again, but the last time you ever felt that way was when you were 8 years old. “Hey Y/n.” Joel said as he walked up to you and gave you a fast and soft hug. You always were awkward with eachother. “Hey Joel” You said giving him a soft smile. Ellie snorted, catching you and Joel’s attention. “Come on, you guys.” Ellie said patting the empty space beside her. You looked at Joel and he nodded giving you the empty spot next to Ellie’s as he sat in front of you both.

“Look, Joel. A lot has happened this past few months or years and i’m really happy to see you but… I have to tell you something.” Ellie said straightforwardly gripping at your hand under the table. “Throw it at me, kiddo.” Joel said as he smiled and leaned back against the booth couch. “Me and Y/n are together.” you all went silent as you looked at Ellie and Joel. It went quiet as it seemed like they were both trying to win a staring contest. Not until the silence was broken by Joel’s laughter. “Kiddo, that’s nothing new to me! I thought you both were already together before I left the goddamn country.” Joel said as he snorted laughing too hard at Ellie’s face. You observed Ellie as she had her mouth agape and staring blankly at Joel. “Oh, fuck you.” Ellie spat as they both laughed. “I’m happy for y’all. Really.” Joel reassured as he looked at you. “I never knew you had it in ya.” You blushed in embarassment as you gripped at Ellie’s arm. She chuckled and kicked Joel’s foot. “Sorry, sorry.. I was just sayin’ “

“It must be hard for ya, since ya know.. your parents.” Joel spoke hesitantly as he tried to look for any expressions on your face that were a sign of discomfort. There weren’t any. “I moved out a couple of years ago and I haven’t contacted them since.” You smiled as you fiddled with your hands. “That must’ve felt horrible, i’m so sorry to have brought it up kiddo.” Joel smiled.

“I think you’re great for Ellie. Really.” Your eyes widened as you realized the contradiction of what you had just said earlier and snapped your gaze directly at Ellie’s. Ellie smirked and gave you a look telling you “I told you so”.

“I have seen none in this life that I saw better for Ellie.” You softly smiled as you looked at Joel, waiting for him to continue his sentence. “I know that I might have not made you feel like I liked you, especially when you were a kid. But I know that no one made Ellie happier than you. I know you’re a great person, y/n.”

“And I know that ya might not have felt like you’ve been accepted. But i’m always here to also stand as your father. Ya know that right? I’m not always showy. Even Ellie knows that.” Ellie chuckled as she nodded. “Just know that i’ve always treated you as my own, babygirl.” Joel nodded as he reached for your hand. Tightly gripping it. “Oh, come on now. Don’t be a sap.” Ellie interrupted as you all shared laughters again.

“I am genuinely happy though.” Joel nodded as he both looked at you and Ellie. “You both are perfect for eachother.”

After the meeting, you felt euphoric. You were so glad that Joel loved you. But then again, there were no reason for him not to. Your behavior when you were a child was nothing compared to now, he admired your growth as a person and you knew that you would influence Ellie greatly.

“I love you.” Ellie blurted out. You looked at her with a confused look.

“I love you too. What’s wrong?” You chuckled as you seemed taken aback by the sudden exchange of iloveyou’s.

“I don’t know. I just felt like I haven’t said that enough.” Ellie looked down at her feet, fiddling with her hands. You frowned as you took a step close to Ellie, pulling her in to your embrace. “I just feel like I have wasted all these years in my life being a coward instead of feeling your touch and love like how i’m doing right now.”

You sighed as you cupped Ellie’s cheeks. “It’s not only you to blame you know? I was dumb too.” You laughed as you felt Ellie’s body soften with your touch.

You were in that verge too. You wanted to blame yourself for not accepting yourself sooner but you were still glad that you did anyway. You were happy that even though in the most darkest times… Like the times that you would ignore her because you were jealous or because you just didn’t want to talk to her because you were having another one of your crisis. She was still there. And it was selfish, you knew that. But you were glad that she was still there for you to claim as yours.

You could’ve never found that love for Xavier. He was just one of your facades that you had to escape to find the true happiness within. It was Ellie. And it will always forever be Ellie.

In this society, Lesbians have been nothing but fetishized. Always stereotyped to the point that you were scared of the oppression you had to face.

And that’s the thing you have always been scared of, society. It always seemed like it was you vs. 7 billion people in this world. But the truth is? you’re not alone. And in fact, you’ll never be.

You wish you could’ve just been like Ellie, she came out as a free woman without giving a fuck. And she always had that fighting spirit within that you wish you could achieve. But you knew deep inside that she was also struggling as much as you.

If loving you wasn’t considered as a sin, I would’ve loved you to my full potential.

If loving you wasn’t a part of being condemned, I would’ve married you and took you to the aisle of my favorite church and prayed that we would be eternal.

If loving you wasn’t wrong, I would’ve realized that it was you all along. And I wouldn’t have to be with someone that I knew I didn’t want.

I’ve lived with two hearts, the other one was loving you and the other one was pretending that I didn’t.

#ellie williams tlou #ellie williams #ellie tlou #ellie x reader #the last of us #ellie x fem reader #ellie x y/n #lesbian #female reader #tlou #lgbtqia #tloufic #tlou2 #tlou fanfiction

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miniongrin · 2 years

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for the fake emmet au: do you think ingo's chandelure felt the zorua make that soul bond? can it communicate to the zorua and or ingo through it?

Ooh thanks for the questions, I love rambling about my AUs and this also gave me a bunch of worldbuilding ideas specifically for soul bonds with Ghost-types! So I’m gonna take this as an excuse to infodump and go into way more depth than you actually asked for because I have adhd and am incapable of shutting up ahaha

But I will also be nice to mobile users and stick it under a readmore :)

So, for your first question: Chandelure definitely would have felt something happen through the soul bond, but probably wouldn’t be able to pin down exactly what was going on.

Usually, Chandelure’s bond with Ingo lets it know vaguely what Ingo is feeling—strong emotions only usually, though they’ve been training together so long that Chandelure can pick out subtler ones sometimes too—and, if they were separated, Chandelure would be able to follow the “direction” of the soul bond to find Ingo.

Ingo can feel the soul bond to a certain extent, but he’s a human and therefore not a ghost-type, so it’s not usually conscious on his part? Especially since soul bonds aren’t super well understood even in modern times, and a lot of the effects get swept up into “Wow, you’re so in-tune with your Pokémon!” especially since soul bonds need at least the potential of friendship and loyalty to form in the first place. He’s very good at “guessing” what Chandelure is feeling or trying to communicate to him if he’s paying attention, and might be able to “instinctively” figure out which way Chandelure had gone if they got separated, but it’s a lot weaker and since he doesn’t really know he can do either of those things he’s not going to be doing them on purpose or relying on the abilities.

Right now, with Ingo in the past, Chandelure’s soul bond to Ingo is really really strained, so it can tell that he’s alive and generally in what state—mostly how close to death he is or isn’t. Very little if any emotion can get through anymore, and the “direction” of the soul bond is going through space and time so when Chandelure tries to find Ingo it basically gets a 404 Not Found error back: Ingo is alive, but unreachable.

As for Ingo, while he’s in Hisui, he’s getting zilch through the soul bond. It’s too strained, and it’s not a part of himself he has conscious awareness of, although the soul bond is why he can still remember Chandelure, however vaguely.

For Zorua’s part in this, we get a little more into how it works for trainers who have multiple Ghost-type Pokémon who like them enough to have a soul bond. Because on a normal team, yeah, those bonds would be woven together as long as the different Pokémon didn’t really hate each other, and they would be able to communicate over distances, though probably not very clearly—emotions, short and blurry mental images, that sort of thing.

(This can’t happen without a human they’re both bonded to, btw. They need a human soul to latch onto, Ghost-types can’t directly affect each other’s.)

Except there’s the time strain, and also, Chandelure wasn’t present when Zorua bonded with Ingo. Their soul bonds are layered instead of woven together. (This could be fixed easily if both Pokémon were available to adjust the energies at the same time, but they… are not.)

Chandelure noticed, for sure, since ghostly energy transfers through the bond very strongly, but can’t actually do anything about it or even figure out what exactly is even going on, since the bond Zorua made doesn’t actually touch Chandelure’s energy—Ingo could have bonded with another Ghost-type, or the energy could be from a Ghost-type possessing him or otherwise controlling his actions, and while Chandelure can be sure his soul is intact and can’t get eaten, it can’t really narrow down those other possibilities from the other side of the timeline.

As time goes on, though, Chandelure is pretty sure it’s another soul bond, if only because Ingo is still in good health and occasionally sending flashes of happiness through the bond.

#fake emmet au #thanks for the ask i love to ramble!!#oh man i haven't answered asks in a geological age tho #all the auto tag settings are gone #need to go look up how i'm supposed to get a decent post editor in my inbox these days too

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kitausuret · 2 years

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“nobody can take 'symby is sweet on any of Eddie and or Flash's current or past lovers' away from me” this is beautiful, I love it! ❤️

LOL thank you, for context everyone, I'd left these tags on a recent reblog - but it's true! I just really like the idea of the symbiote being sweet on those who its host(s) love, or have loved. I don't even have a whole lot of canon to back it up it's just vibes. 😭 Well, except for maybe that moment when Flash slipped and said "we" re: failing to protect Betty... hehe. (This was ASM #660-something I think..)

Am I looking into it too deeply, especially considering it was written by Slott? Probably! But also I don't care. I think that it should be allowed to think Betty is wonderful. In fact, here's a little snippet from my upcoming chapter of Dust to Dust when Eddie and his beloved other run into Flash's ex at a bagel shop:

[Eddie] tried to mentally prod the symbiote for assistance, but it directed him to look towards the metal cafe chairs set up around small, wobbly tables. “Betty?” “‘Betty’?” he repeated, bewildered. Just then, a brunette woman looked up from her laptop and immediately got that look in her eyes - puzzlement, followed by shock, followed by apprehension. ... His other, however, was bubbling with what seemed like affection, almost like seeing an old friend.

Additionally, I was always a little annoyed by how many writers wrote the symbiote as borderline antagonistic towards Anne. It just felt weird to me! I actually have another WIP loosely inspired by MC2 where ultimately what I want is for Anne and Eddie to repair their relationship - and for Anne to have a better relationship with the symbiote, too.

After she and Eddie have gone on a few dates and they've deliberately avoided talking about the symbiote, she tells Eddie she'd like to see his other, and says the following:

“But I know when it bonded with me, it did so in an effort to protect me. The way you would. And I’ve…” She paused, as if trying to find the right word. “...discussed this. With my therapist.”

Not to mention I have MANY feelings about this Venom: Along Came a Spider scene after the weird uh... symbiote-through-the-phone thing. Which was weird as hell but I'll take whatever I can get when it comes to a three-way symbiotic connection because that's my jam.

And furthermore, I don't see anything wrong with the idea of a host still desiring a relationship with another person, especially if they'd been with that individual prior to bonding to the symbiote.

Not to go on too far of a tangent but I think this is part of why the Venom films have appealed to me so much. People who know me know that I ship the Dan/Anne/Venom/Eddie ot4 pretty hard (like I'm literally incapable of writing anything in that universe without them) but also I just really love a world where Anne has a much better relationship with the symbiote. It is, in fact, super fun and delightful.

SO, with all that in mind, thank you so much for giving me an excuse to ramble about one of my favorite headcanons. I'll close this out by my favorite Symby/Flash/Valkyrie panel in existence from the Thunderbolts Annual.

Cheers! 🎉💕

#asked and answered #well it wasn't really much of an ask #i just got carried away with saying thank you #but anyways yes i have many thots #venom #eddie brock #flash thompson #anne weying #betty brant #tiny fic snippets #ship thoughts

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chalky · 3 years

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The Commodification of c!Tubbo

This essay is unnecessary but I think about it too much so here you go

At this point, y’all are probably sick and tired of me rambling about c!Tubbo, as this is about all my original posts are. But, I feel as though this is an important aspect of his character that is either swept under the rug or never given any second glance.

Whether intentionally or not, Tubbo has been constantly commodified by allies and enemies alike (don’t even get me started on the fandom, that’s for a whole other post). Like, throughout the entire story of the Dream SMP, Tubbo has been looked down upon as a yes man, sidekick, or extension of another character who is incapable of making decisions for himself, which is such a degrading thing to experience for so long and explains why his character values himself so little.

This is a long one, heads up!

I want to break up this dehumanization and commodification into three categories:

Tubbo is either a pawn (something to be used), a trophy(something to be owned), or a scapegoat(something to be blamed) to others.

Tubbo Seen as a Pawn:

Wilbur loved Tubbo, but his treatment of him during the Pogtopia arc was definitely sad to see. (Note: Wilbur was spiraling and his mental health was in shambles. He couldn’t help his paranoia and he deserved way better than the ending he got, but that doesn’t absolve the effects of his actions on others). First he took Tubbo on as a spy, a very dangerous role that landed him dead, but throughout Tubbo’s service Wilbur saw him as an obedient pawn, while not a loyal one. A pawn ready to turn to whatever authority figure commanded him best. His remarks about Tubbo being a yes man back this up, and the way he warns Tommy that Tubbo will betray them erases all of Tubbo’s identity and reduces it to that of a spy (again, this is born of Wilburs paranoia, this isn’t his fault).

Dream made it very clear that he regarded Tubbo as lesser than a toy, so obedient and trusting that he wasn’t worth keeping alive because he was so boring to him. The whole speech about Tubbo being worthless wasn’t even directed at him despite him being right there. Dream only addressed Tommy as if he was the one whose opinion on Tubbos fate mattered.

Jack Manifold literally used Tubbo’s trust to attempt to kill Tommy, saying that he was a sweet guy but way too gullible. No better way to treat someone as a pawn to further ones own agenda than by literally using them. (Him talking about how he’d be there to comfort Tubbo after the assisted murder of his best friend still mildly disturbs me).

Quackity managed to talk Tubbo into going through with the Butcher Army, using Tubbo’s power to further Quackity’s agenda (which, by Quackity’s own admission, did not revolve around the protection of L’manburg.) Quackity didn’t care that Tubbo was against violence, and pushed his concerns to the side in favor of his own ideas and kept comparing Tubbo to Schlatt whenever he acted in a way he disagreed with.

Speaking of, THE CONSTANT DISREGARD OF HIS DECISIONS AS PRESIDENT. His Cabinet never listened to him and lowkey every stream they had together was a bit frustrating to me (I’m also a sensitive bitch). They didn’t respect him in any way and undermined his authority UNTIL THEY NEEDED HIM TO SAVE EVERYONE’S LIFE. (Elaborated on in Scapegoat Category).

Technically, as much as I am a Tommy apologist, Tommy’s constant insistence that the Disc War needed to involve Tubbo kind of fits under this category. As much as Tubbo was happy to help, his involvement wasn’t really necessary, but Tommy needed someone to help him. This involvement nearly resulted in his willing death.

The only reason Dream even wanted to kill Tubbo, on top of perceiving him as useless, was to hurt Tommy and give him something of a “hero origin story” like Batman and his parents or Spider-Man and Uncle Ben. So, literally by Dream’s definition, he wanted to fridge Tubbo.

We could refer to Wilbur assigning Tubbo to presidency as Wilbur using him to make the explosion of L’manburg hurt more, but that feels like a stretch to me.

This may be a stretch, but after Tubbo is executed and Tommy starts getting mad at Technoblade, Wilbur eggs Tommy on by saying “Think of what he did to Tubbo,” while Tubbo is literally right there. His emotions on the event doesn’t matter to Wilbur, only how it impacted Tommy.

Tubbo Seen as a Prize/Trophy

The constant referral of Tubbo as something to be owned by someone, like during Wilburs speech of “he’s your Tubbo!”, is a bit off putting though I don’t think it’s meant to be malicious. Very rarely is the sentiment reversed, seen when Ghostbur gave Tubbo the Your Tommy compass, furthering the idea that Tubbo is an object, something to be sought after and secured with little opportunity for him to own something himself. It’s always “Tommy’s Tubbo”. Also when Schlatt gloated about having “his very own Tubbo”.

Tommy shows more possessive behaviors when dealing with the discovery of Ranboo and Tubbo’s marriage, asking about permission and insisting that Ranboo stole Tubbo from him. I’m sure this is subconscious, I know Tommy values Tubbo as a person but he still reduces Tubbo to an object to guard because he treasures his friend.

Another more vague example would be the fact that Schlatt exiled Wilbur and Tommy, but kept Tubbo as his right hand man even though it was clear he was on POG2020’s side. It was a way to insult Tommy, a way for Schlatt to add salt to the wound by keeping his best friend.

The Dream Team captured Tubbo very early into the Revolution, keeping him in a hole and holding him for ransom (this could be played off for laughs, I just remembered it). They also burned down his base, unrelated really but I remember it.

We could also count the way that Dream kept threatening to kill Tubbo if Tommy didn’t return the disc, but this feels like a mixture of pawn and prize, while still dehumanizing as it compares his value to that of music discs.

Yes, I am going to take c!Tommy joking about killing Michael to get Tubbo and Ranboo to break up so he can get Tubbo back seriously. The way he glared at Michael while holding an axe was just for the stream to see, if it was a joke I feel like he would have said it out loud. Even if it is a joke, laughing about taking something Tubbo loves away just to ruin his relationships is a bit yikes and frames Tubbo as something to be won back. You can ignore this if you didn’t see that moment as canon, but there are plenty of signs pointing to this being in character. (Also to be noted, Tubbo didn’t want to show Michael to Tommy, so Tommy ignored him and asked Ranboo instead, who immediately showed Tommy to Michael despite Tubbo’s clear worries)

Tubbo seen as a Scapegoat

His cabinet flip flopped back and forth on the decision to exile Tommy every five seconds. Whenever they spoke with Tubbo, they were all “You’re right! We’re going to listen to you! We have to do what’s right!” and then they hear a half baked plan and completely switch up on what they already agreed to do. (This happened twice. One at the sit down meeting where Tommy revealed Spirit and the cabinet joined Tommy in his mocking, only to blame him for how the meeting ended. Twice at the exile). So when Tubbo had to follow the original plan to, you know, make sure their country wasn’t put under lock and key until every citizen was eventually killed, his cabinet acted so shocked and betrayed and he was Schlatt and a dictator. It’s very true that he went against their plan (THAT THEY MADE FIVE MINUTES BEFOREHAND AFTER HAVING ALREADY AGREED TO THE FIRST PLAN FOR DAYS), but the way they treated him afterwards, as if he was a vile person for keeping his country safe, heavily impacted Tubbo’s mental state for a long time after. What I’m saying is Tubbo was set up to be the villain in that scenario, accidentally by his allies, and purposefully by Dream.

Tubbo was blamed for the destruction of L’manburg by Dream and a few others (also himself)

TUBBO IS CONSTANTLY BLAMED FOR THE BUTCHER ARMY ARC DESPITE IT BEING COMPLETELY THOUGHT OF AND LEAD BY QUACKITY (This is predominately fandom based).

The full blame for Tommy’s exile has rested on Tubbo (I will never forget Tommy calling him a monster), despite the fact he was manipulated and backed into a corner by Dream. Even when everyone has come to understand that Tommy was manipulated by Dream, the same doesn’t go for Tubbo and he’s hit with “imagine exiling your best friend” jokes many times.

Wilbur puts the decision of blowing people up at the festival on Tubbo’s shoulders, absolving him of the blame.

Schlatt made Tubbo tear down the L’manburg walls and the important signs so he could have to deal with the blame (though Quackity took the fall for this).

This is more theory based, but I fully believe Wilbur made Tubbo president right in front of Techno to egg him on to attack L’manburg. Since Tubbo would be the president, he would take the full brunt of Techno’s wrath (and he and Tommy did), and the destruction fell onto him.

So! With my text evidence we can see a recurring pattern in the way that Tubbo has been used by many people over the history of the server without much regard for his feelings. There are very few times when people besides Tommy ask how Tubbo feels about a situation, leaving him to his dark thoughts without anybody caring. Even during the Final Disc War, when Tubbo was literally moments from death, nobody asks how he is. Nobody (except Quackity once) checks up on him, and he builds up his community by himself. Until Ranboo came along, and I am not overexaggerating this, nobody was with Tubbo to support him. He had no support system and nobody cared. They just assume that he is always fine and if he wasn’t, it isn’t their place to intervene. Tubbo is just not respected, feared, or acknowledged unless he has someone by his side, or unless he’s doing something bad in which case he’s unhinged and evil and sure to have a villain arc.

This is just something to find interesting:

The only few characters Tubbo is actively involved with that hasn’t looked down on him as a sidekick or an object has been Foolish, Puffy, Ranboo and Technoblade. You could make an argument of how Technoblade referring to him as “government” could be dehumanizing but I don’t think I’ve actually seen him do that in character? I could be wrong though. Really, Technoblade takes him seriously, but way more seriously than c!Tubbo warrants. Like, he’s looking for a tyrant to beat up and Tubbo is literally just a guy with a lot of issues struggling to keep a handle on his cabinet, which I find funny. But, jokes aside, Technoblade saw Tubbo as a legitimate threat during his presidency and is respectfully cautious of him and his nukes presently, which is surprising to me. Ranboo adores Tubbo and all of his chaos that people are unaware of because they don’t get to know him well enough. Puffy just wants the best for all the kids of the server and knows how to be respectful of their feelings, and Foolish is respectful of Tubbo, if a bit annoyed and intimidated by him.

The point of this essay is just to show that there is a pattern to these things. This is how Tubbo is treated, this is why Tubbo is prepared to die for whatever because because he doesn’t feel he’s worth anything while alive, and this is why it’s frustrating to see characters call him a follower, pawn, or yes man. And here’s the thing: I DONT KNOW WHY THEY TREAT HIM LIKE THIS??? Why him? I can’t really find out why this started to happen.

To sum some things up, no I don’t think every character who treats him poorly is completely evil. Again, some of this seems to be subconscious, some of this could be argued to be OOC, I just wanted to bring this pattern to light.

#dream smp #tubbo #meta #tubbo appreciation #character analysis #jschlatt #dreamwastaken #I said I’d do an essay #here’s the essay

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beskarhearts · 3 years

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Silence (Din Djarin x reader)

Connection series pt. 1

Pairing: Din Djarin x gn!reader (no use of Y/N)

Warnings: cursing, mention of family members passing away, nightmares

Word count: A little over 3.2K

Summary: The Mandalorian is an extremely quiet man, not saying much of anything or making any noise, which is driving his new partner crazy.

Notes: I love these two together so I am going to write about them multiple times and am making it into a series. All the parts for this will be on my masterlist!

Next Part

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The silence was killing you.

During the day, it wasn’t as bad. The child usually gurgled and rambled away, speaking words only he could understand. The sounds of his giggles filled the air and lighted the mood. You would talk to the kid constantly, having him as a new loyal companion who would listen to you with wide eyes, responding in his own little ways.

But eventually the hours would die out and the kid would finally go to sleep for the night. And that is when the complete silence would kick in. Besides the soft snores of the child and the endless whir of the Razor Crest traveling through hyperspace, there would be absolutely no noise. No speaking, humming, clearing of the throat, nada.

You were used to being alone. You didn’t really have a lot of friends or companions before you joined the Mandalorian and his child, but it wasn’t quiet like this. When you were alone, you would hum or silently sing. You’d open your window and listen to the world around you. But, the Razor Crest was void of all of that, as well as the Mandalorian.

You honestly didn’t how it was possible. It had only been a matter of a few weeks now, but you had noticed how the Mandalorian could go hours without making even the quietest of noises. No cough, no heavy breathing, no words. He would just sit in the cockpit of his ship and stare into the hyperspace, seeming to study it for hours at end with no interruptions. The only time he would make noise is when he was fixing a weapon or the ship, or the eventual noises that accompanied him when he eventually shuffled his way into bed.

It drove you nuts. The silence was eerie and gave you too much time to think, to dwell on things you shouldn’t. But it wasn’t like you could just walk up to Mando and start a conversation with him. You knew little to nothing about the man in beskar, but you knew that he enjoyed his silence and enjoyed being left alone. When you first boarded the ship and joined him and his child, you tried to talk to him. You would crack jokes and sarcastically tease him like you did with everyone. But, he didn’t seem to be amused by that or succumb to your humor. He wouldn’t laugh and he barely even responded. He would just stare at you with his helmet until he eventually turned away to do something else.

You thought maybe he was just shy, not used to the company of a person. Maybe he just needed time to warm up to you. So, you decided you would let him speak first. You’d keep quiet like he wanted until he was comfortable enough to spark a conversation with you. When you came up with this plan, you relied on the fact that eventually he must speak to you. I mean you were stuck together and what was he going to do - never say anything ever? At the time, it seemed like an atrocious thought but now you had deemed it was very much possible you would spend your future days in complete silence when you were with the Mandalorian. Your plan to wait for Mando to speak now seemed ridiculous. Were you really not going to say anything and live in silence until the giant, glorified tin can decided to speak? I mean kriff, that day may never even come.

You sat on the floor of the belly of the Razor Crest, listening to the soft little breathes of the child as he lay sleeping in his hammock that the Mandalorian had resurrected for him. The Mandalorian was sat in the cockpit as always, out of sight, and you were alone. You had tried to go to sleep, hoping that would ease the uncomfortableness of the silence but it was hard for you to sleep nowadays. Every time you closed your eyes, you saw images of your parents and grandmother and those were memories too painful to relive for you. Nightmares plagued your nights so instead you would sit there awake for many hours, eventually laying down but spending most of your time staring at the ceiling above you.

Your mind drifted eventually, thinking of the child and how much you cared for him. You would never dare describe yourself as his mother, more like a glorified nanny at this point, but you felt a connection with the little one. He was warm and full of light and so much power. He seemed like a simple little kid but he was so much more complex.

You sat in the same spot thinking and didn’t even realize how much time had passed until you heard the thud of the Mandalorians boots on the floor. You looked up at the man, watching as he let go of the ladder that took him to and from the cockpit. You expected him to walk to his cot and close the hatch to it as he always did but instead his modulated voice let out a single sentence: “What was that?”

It took you a minute to process the fact that he had spoken to you and you felt yourself freeze up. You had been waiting for the man to finally say something, anything to you. Anything that would interrupt the silence. But now that it was happening, it felt so uncomfortable. You guess eventually you had gotten used to the silence and Mando trying to speak to you felt so odd, for him and yourself.

“What are you talking about?” You looked over at the child, but he was still knocked out cold. No noise came from him. Nothing knocked over or fell over. You heard nothing, as always.

“You were humming.”

Well, shit. You hadn’t even realized you were doing so. You probably annoyed him with it. You must have slipped into it, humming away to a tune you thought had been long forgotten but was apparently still very prevalent in your mind. You stood to your feet, looking at the Mandalorian and letting out a small “I’m sorry.”

Then you froze. Why the kriff were you apologizing? This man has made you sit in complete and utter silence for weeks and you finally hum a little because you are a damn human. And then he has the audacity to ask you what you were doing. “Actually, no. I am not sorry.” You clarified, feeling how annoyed you were with all the silence come out.

And what a surprise, the Mandalorian responded with complete silence, the only indication he was listening being a small tilt of his helmet.

“Sir, have you ever considered the possibility that you are a droid or something?” You sarcastically let out, perching a hand on your hip as you stared back.

“What?” A small scoff followed, sound distorted through his mask but you picked it up. The Mandalorian copied your movements, perching his own hand on his hip and cocking it out to the side.

“Well, I’ve just never met a human being who could sit in absolute silence and never say a word for so long. You must be a droid.” You let out a laugh. “Actually, I have met droids who have talked way more than you. I swear you vocabulary only consists of grunts, sighs, and saying ‘This is the way.’ Oh, and tonight we’ve added to your extensive list, a thrilling ‘What was that?’”

You let out a loud sigh as you finished your rambling, staring back at the man before you. And you didn’t think you could believe your ears at the noise that followed.

“Wait...was that a...” You pause, staring at him incredulously, “Did you just laugh or did your helmet malfunction?”

“I am able to laugh.” Mando said shortly and you swore that his voice seemed a little lighter than it ever had before.

“Well, how would I ever know that? Whenever I tell a joke or say something, you just respond with silence. I thought you were incapable of human emotion because, sir, I am kriffing hilarious and you haven’t laughed at my jokes once.”

“I laughed at you tonight.” You wanted to rip your hair out at his matter-of-fact attitude.

“Nooo. You didn’t laugh at my joke. You laughed because your complete silence is driving me loony. The only person I ever talk to anymore is the child and I don’t know if he can even understand me!” You throw your hands in the direction of the child, who still was sleeping peacefully away. “I mean how do you do it? Just say nothing for hours?”

“Mandalorians aren’t very talkative people.”

“So, when you are in a room with people, you just sit there and don’t say a word the whole time? What about friends or other Mandalorians?”

“I don’t talk to people. I’ve always been alone.”

The statement was made very definitively, with no emotion, but it made your annoyance simmer away slightly. You considered that the life of a Mandalorian must be very lonely. Nobody to talk to. You always have to keep your name and face hidden, never able to open up to someone completely and fully. You didn’t know much about Mandalorians but you could sense that connection and feelings weren’t of much importance. It was supposed to a life that consisted of an endless cycle of catching bounties and getting credits.

You knew that the Mandalorian that stood before you was already different, capable of connecting with a creature and caring for him. You saw it in the way he would mumble to the child, hold him against him, or even when you caught him wiggling his finger for the child to grab. The Mandalorian had been adjusting to life with one little child by his side and then you came along. And you would have to guess that a snarky, fully grown female was a bit harder to be comfortable with than the kid was.

“Well, you aren’t anymore. I know it probably kills you but you are stuck with me for a little while. And I’m not saying you have to talk to me all the time but I am here to talk to. And I think if I sit here in complete silence for another hour, I will go crazy.” You give the Mando a small smile, hoping to ease some of the tension in the room and not annoy his with your words. You didn’t want to force him to talk to you, but you also kind of did.

There was silence for a few moments and you were worried you scared off the Mando until he nodded slightly. “Okay.”

You let out a sigh of relief and quietly clapped your hands together, rocking back and forth on your heels. “Okay. Good.”

“Can I ask you a question?”

You raised your eyebrows, shocked that he was still engaging in conversation. “Sure.”

“Where did you hear that song you were humming?” Your smile dropped a little bit at the question but you tried to cover it quickly, though you could tell Mando could sense the change in your attitude. “I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s... umm...” You closed your eyes for a second and let out a small breath, feeling your fists clench. “My mom used to sing it to me to get me to sleep. It is just a silly little lullaby.” You looked down at your feet, feeling burned from remembering the memory.

“My mother used to sing that to me as well.” You felt an initial wave of confusion from his words. You had never thought about the fact that the Mandalorian had parents. I mean, you knew he didn’t just come from nothing. But, the idea of the Mandalorian as a child, with a family, seemed so bizarre. You tried to imagine a small child with a mother and father but couldn’t help but to just imagine his helmet on a smaller body. You then wondered how long he had been a Mandalorian as a child and if his parents were Mandalorians as well.

Your mind whirled with questions from the one small sentence he said, but you didn’t want to scare him off. You just let out a small, “Huh. Small universe, I guess.”

“Do your parents know where you are now?”

You wanted to tell Mando to stop asking you questions. You wanted to tell him to leave you alone but you didn’t want to shut him out right when he was finally starting to open up a little. You couldn’t slam the door in his face that you just convinced him to open. But this was the one thing you didn’t want to talk about. The one thing you were hoping was never mentioned. You looked back down at your feet, balling your fists and closing your eyes to build a dam against the tears threatening to fall. But, all you saw was your families face and that caused a bang in your chest that almost felt unbearable.

Mando knew instantly what the twist of pain in your face meant, for he had done it himself for years and years at the mention of family. It had been so long since he lost his family but it still burned and caused an aching feeling in his chest he didn’t know if he would ever be able to get rid of. He saw all of that in your eyes and felt dumb for asking the question. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

You let out a shakey sigh and look back up at the Mandalorian. You imagined he was probably judging you and your weakened state. He probably saw you as fragile and wrecked, something he didn’t want to handle. Damaged goods might as well have been stamped on your forehead. “It’s fine.”

You turned around, wiping at your eyes and starting to trail back to your small bed on the floor when you heard four words that simultaneously made you feel less alone but also broke your heart. “Mine are gone too.”

You turned to look back at the Mandalorian and looked him up and down. To the average person, he’d look like he always did: strong and bold. But, you saw the slight sag of his shoulders and the way his helmet slightly tilted down to the floor. You couldn’t see the pain that was on his face, but you could sense what he was feeling. A layer to the Mandalorian suddenly opened up to you that wasn’t there before. He wasn’t just a set of armor. He was a man, one who had been broken and scarred by the horror of the world. And even though he was covered head to toe in beskar, it didn’t mean he didn’t feel emotions. It just meant he couldn’t show them. Feeling emotions like these were bad enough but having no one to see it or confide in made it feel impossible to deal with somedays.

“I’m so sorry, Mando.”

“It’s okay. It was a really long time ago.” The words were said gruffly, as if they were bricks being built in a wall to push back the emotions he was feeling.

You wanted to hug him or grab his hand. Do something to console him and show him he wasn’t alone, that his pain could be your pain even though your own was so raw. You barely knew this man, having had your first real conversation with him only tonight. But, you felt like you understood him a lot better than before and in a way others might not be able to. And you wanted to hand your strength over to him and you didn’t want to admit it, but you wouldn’t have minded if he had handed his own over to you.

Instead of physically reaching out, you hoped to ease his pain with your words. “I don’t know your parents but I imagine they’d have to be proud of you. The way you care for the kid... you are a good father, Mando. And I know you insist you aren’t the kids father, but he sees you that way. I can tell. And he cares about you and I can tell that you care for him. And you took me in even though you didn’t have to.” You sniffled but brought a small smile to your face, hoping to lighten the mood with a joke. “And I know I am a pain and you’ve let me stay, so you must be a good person.”

“Thank you.” You couldn’t tell if your words helped at all but you still smiled in response.

“Well, we went from not talking to me almost crying in front of you, so I would say this is going spectacularly well.” You let out a chuckle, once again rubbing at your eyes. It was bizarre to you how one conversation seemed to open up so much between you two but it also created so many other questions you wanted to ask but they were ones that would have to wait for future conversations you hoped to have. Space and life was hard enough, but with someone to talk to, it made it bearable.

“I also added to my vocabulary.” The words were said in the same monotone way all his words were said, but you felt a real smile brighten up your face. The Mandalorian just made a joke with you. You had simply hoped for him to say anything to you to end the silence and here he was making a joke with you.

“Look at you, making jokes. In no time, you will be talking more than I do.”

“That is unlikely.” An exasperated tone was expressed with the words, along with what could be seen as a sarcastic shake of the head. His humor was dry, but it was something you could decipher and appreciate.

“I don’t know if I should be insulted or not by the way you said that.” You teased and you swear you heard another laugh until a piercing cry interrupted it. You looked over at the child who was throwing his hands in the air and wailing, with big tears filling his eyes that looked up at you and his father. “Oh, you wanted to join in on the pity party too?”

You started making your way to the child when Mando strolled past you and grab him, holding him in his arms and rocking him lightly. “I got him. You go to sleep.”

You smiled warmly at the Mando, wondering if he was doing the same under his helmet. “Okay. Night, Mando.”

You wandered to your bed on the floor and listened as the Mandalorian spoke to the child. He whispered as best as he could with the modulator on and you couldn’t hear much through his low whisper, but it brought peace to you. You liked the way he talked to the kid and how the kid slowly sank back into a peaceful sleep with the comfort of the Mandalorian.

Eventually, the lights turned out and you heard the Mandalorian shuffle into his bed, closing the hatch to it. Instead of dwelling on the past or feeling the pain of your loss, you smiled into the darkness, reflecting on your conversation. Eventually, your eyes drifted close and you fell into sleep.

That was the first night in a long time that you didn’t have a nightmare.

#the mandalorian #din djarin x reader #din djarin imagine #mandalorian x reader #mandalorian imagine #din djarin #din djarin x gn!reader #the mandalorian fanfiction #din djarin fanfiction #din djarin x you

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superhusbands4ever · 3 years

Text

life is far away from fair - The Bad Batch (Ao3)

Words: 1562 | Rated: Gen | Hunter & Tech & Crosshair (& Rex, kinda)

Canon through Episode 3: Replacements | Lotta Angst

“Do you think he’s eating enough?”

Hunter pulled his eyes from where he’d been blankly watching the hyperspace lane fly by.

Tech was sitting in the copilot seat, fiddling with his inhibitor chip scanner. Wrecker and Echo were back in the bunks, staying with Omega after the girl had woken them all screaming from a nightmare.

Hunter certainly couldn’t blame her. He shuddered when he thought about their time in that Zygerrian camp, the collars around his brothers necks, Omega’s screaming and crying, begging the slavers to stop as they cracked the electro-whip at his back—

They were all sleeping a little rough after that. Thankfully they’d found Rex’s scrambled beacon not too long after and were able to take a couple of days to relax before Crosshair and his team found them and they had to—

And before Cody—

He was grateful to their ori’vod for helping them escape, but prying Echo from the other man was the hardest thing Hunter had done after leaving Kamino without their kih’vod. He hoped Rex was okay.

He hoped Rex was still alive.

Little gods, everything was so karked these days.

Omega was able to fall back asleep pretty quickly with Wrecker holding her, but Hunter hadn’t been able to, so he offered to take the first watch in the cockpit. They were in hyperspace and on autopilot, so there was really no reason for him to keep watch, but he needed some time to gather his thoughts.

Tech had come in an hour later, mumbling under his breath about Wrecker and Echo snoring before dropping into the seat beside Hunter and messing with his scanner.

They’d been sitting in silence for a while, Hunter lost in his own mind, before Tech’s voice broke through the silence.

He was still toying with the device in his hands, his voice the same clinical monotone as always, and he was carefully avoiding looking in Hunter’s direction.

“He has a faster metabolism of course, so if he doesn’t eat often enough he gets—“

“Dizzy spells,” Hunter finished, watching Tech carefully. “Yeah, I remember.”

“And he’s always been weird about eating,” Tech continued as if Hunter hadn’t spoken. “Statistically speaking, with the number of times we had to take him to the mess ourselves versus the number of times he went willingly, it’s unlikely that he’s—“

“I don’t know if he’s eating, Tech,” Hunter said softly, cutting the man off before he could work himself up. “I hope he is.”

Tech nodded, pulling a small screwdriver from somewhere and poking at his scanner.

It was instantaneous when my chip came out. I still remembered everything I’d done, but I was in control again.

Tech had been quiet about Crosshair since they left Kamino. While Wrecker and Echo and even Omega had expressed some fear for Crosshair and a longing to get him back, Tech hadn’t said much. A few passing comments about the chips, mentioning Cross’s name only when absolutely necessary to the conversation — speaking about their youngest brother almost clinically, as if everything was normal and they hadn’t broken the one rule they set for themselves when they left him behind.

It was strange at first, because he and Cross had always been close. Being the two youngest of the batch they tended to drift together more often than not. Crosshair was a man of few words while Tech tended to be a man of many. They balanced each other out, in a way. Crosshair was the only one Tech tolerated casual touch from. Tech was the only one Crosshair let near him when he was injured or sick. It was weird to be on the ship and see the two of them not in the cockpit together, Tech rambling about something or another while Crosshair rolled his eyes and tried to hide a smile. It was strange, at first, that Tech didn’t seem to want to acknowledge their brother was gone.

Hunter hadn’t said anything about it because he wasn’t sure what to do. Tech tended to struggle with complex emotions. He didn’t always know how to explain what he was feeling, and he struggled socially because of it.

But having known Tech since he was barely over two growth cycles old, Hunter knew Tech was really good at saying a lot of words without actually saying anything at all. And usually to figure out what he was feeling, actions spoke louder than words.

Theoretically, if you get the chip out, you should get Crosshair back.

He saw the way Tech would clam up and get tongue tied when Crosshair was mentioned. He remembered the way Tech had snapped at him on Salucamai about the chips. He’d leave the room when Wrecker would tell Echo and Omega stories about their time as cadets, the way 99 had brought them together and the way they became the squad they were today.

(Before.)

He saw the way Tech had barely put his inhibitor chip scanner down since their run-in with Rex, constantly fiddling and tinkering with it since Rex told them that the effects of the chip were reversible. Since Rex had given them hope that there was a chance they could get their brother back.

“I don’t understand.”

Hunter looked at Tech, who stared down at the device in his hands.

“You don’t understand what?”

“Why Crosshair?” Tech said slowly, brows furrowing. “All five of us have the chip. Why did only his work? I’ve been trying to figure it out. There’s no logic to it.”

“I don’t know,” Hunter said, having spent too much time asking himself and any higher power in the universe listening the same question. “Sometimes things don’t have a reason. Sometimes things… just happen. There’s not always a logical explanation.”

Tech scowled and his jaw clenched, obviously unsatisfied with the answer, but didn’t argue.

It was like I was watching someone else control my body from the inside. No matter how much I tried to scream, I couldn’t even open my mouth.

“If anything it feels like some kind of sick, cosmic joke,” Hunter finally said the words that had been plaguing him since the order came down and everything changed. “The one clone out of all of us who hated regs and following orders more than anything…”

I was only under its control for a couple of hours at most, but it still felt like a part of me had been ripped out. Sometimes I wake up and I still feel like I’m not myself.

“I hope he’s fighting it.”

Hunter jerked back at the venom in Tech’s tone. It was the most emotion he’d shown the whole conversation, and it was the first time he’d heard Tech sound truly angry about their brother. It was the first time since leaving Kamino that Tech had sounded anything other than indifferent and unperturbed about it all. The tone made him sound so similar to their brother that Hunter was almost surprised to look over and see goggles instead of a crosshair tattoo.

I can’t even imagine how the others might feel. The ones who have been under longer. How much of them are still left.

Tech turned to look at Hunter, finally, and Hunter felt his heart clench at the fire burning in Tech’s eyes.

“I hope he’s fighting back, like he used to,” Tech whispered. “If there’s even a little bit of our Cross’ika left in him, I hope he’s giving them hell.”

I don’t know the long term effects of the chip. I can’t imagine what that might do to someone’s mind.

Hunter thought about Rex, about the way he said he tried to fight the chip before being sucked under its control. That despite realizing what was happening, the split second where he realized Fives was right and this was Palpatine’s plan all along, he’d still been helpless to it’s pull before it dragged him under mentally kicking and screaming.

The order was to execute the Jedi for treason against the Republic, he’d said. But the order also said to execute any clone who refused to comply.

He thought about Crosshair and the way he’d consistently questioned Hunter about letting the Padawan go. The way he’d spit and yelled and called Hunter unfit and incapable, but never lifted a weapon toward them. He’d been angry and confused and lashed out like an frightened and injured tooka backed into a corner.

He did fight it, Hunter desperately wanted to tell his little brother. He already was, he wanted to say, because Crosshair may have yelled and argued and said things that made Hunter feel like he’d been stabbed through the chest, Crosshair never actually tried to stop them, let alone kill them.

But then he thinks of Crosshair in the hanger bay, his vod’ika, armor as blank and empty as the eyes that looked down the scope of the rifle as he shot down Wrecker and taunted Hunter without second thought, and he doesn’t know what to believe.

Once that chip finally comes out, I can’t guarantee how much of the Crosshair you knew will be left behind.

“I hope so, too,” he said instead, praying to the Maker and the Force and Manda and anyone who was listening that by the time they got to Crosshair there was still enough of their baby brother left to be saved.

(that bit with Rex and Cody is a reference to another fic I am currently writing that will be published... eventually idk)

#cady writes #my fic #the bad batch #tbb #tbb hunter #seargent hunter #tbb tech #tbb crosshair #captain rex #the clone wars #clone force 99 #clone trooper tech #clone trooper crosshair

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polkahotness · 4 years

Text

SHORTAKI WEEK DAY 1

FFN // AO3

Long Gone

Sometimes when I look at Helga, it's difficult to remember what it was like before we admitted our feelings for each other. Granted, Helga had admitted her feelings to me countless times and on numerous different occasions, but I had never been all that great at that sort of thing in response.

I supposed that my 'love language' just wasn't the same as hers and it made navigating through our relationship a tumultuous and difficult process at times.

Helga had always been so good with words—her feelings, though oftentimes hidden deep inside, were always so well-articulated. When she wanted to give up the truth behind them, her sentences were thoughtful; poetic, and they came out of her mouth with ease, despite inwardly struggling with that piece of vulnerability.

But me?

It seemed that I still hadn't quite figured out how to best voice my feelings.

It wasn't that I had a problem voicing them—I had no issue whatsoever telling Helga, Gerald, my next-door neighbor, or the entire world how I felt about her. That wasn't the problem. The problem was that I couldn't do it well. My attempts were often clumsy, and I had the tendency to ramble and stumble over each word like I was once again learning how to speak for the first time in my life.

Thankfully, Helga never held it against me. In fact, her response to my feeble attempts usually sounded something like, "Still struggling with that word thing, are we, footballhead?" Then she'd let out this soft little laugh while I blushed and would open my mouth to try and dispute her, though she never let me get that far. "I get it, babe. You love me. And I love you—" then she'd pause and smack my butt while following it up with, "—and that cute little ass of yours."

A lifetime of confusing feelings had changed a lot in the dynamic between Helga and myself—the last six of those years cementing our relationship in a way that 10-year-old-me could have never imagined.

We were the couple people oogled over. Our stories of the bully and the victim turning into lovers was one for the ages, and we never grew tired of talking about it or reminiscing over the foolish children we once were. While anyone with eyes could see the love that we held for one another, it was always Helga who seemed to vocalize it best. As the self-appointed designated speaker, she was usually the one who told our complicated love story as I draped my arm over her shoulders to hold her into me wherever it was that we sat.

Helga had figured out in our time together that I was the shower, and not the teller. My love for her looked like me making dinner when I knew she had a hard day at work and would be too tired to even heat up a tv dinner. It looked like me rubbing her feet while she lay unsuspecting on the couch with her legs on my lap as we binge-watched another series. My love was shown through buying her that book she'd been talking about for three weeks because it was the long-awaited follow-up to her favorite author's poetry book—and I'd even gotten the limited edition copy with the ornately designed cover and gold-lined pages because, while she'd never say it, I knew she preferred the special copy over the boring (and cheaper) paperback version.

It was all of those little things and more that told Helga how much I loved her. But all of those little things could never express what I needed to tell her next. The emotions and feelings I had to say this time around would require me to put my strengths of showing and my weaknesses of telling together so I could be bolder than I'd ever been before.

Because there was nothing in the world that I wouldn't do for her.

It may have taken us a while to realize just how deeply our love for one another went. Even after we'd admitted our feelings, we struggled to get to a place where we mutually realized we were each other's end game. I'm sure Helga already knew this fact because she seemed to have always known, even when we were children, but me? It had taken me much longer.

With Helga, I was always just a few steps behind.

But it was okay.

Helga always managed to wait patiently…always somehow knowing that I was making my way to her.

Throughout our years of syncopated dating habits, a funny thing happened that I could never push away. Helga never left my mind. No matter where I was or what I was doing with who, Helga always remained. It may have taken until we both hit 21 for the stars to officially align, but that night six years ago when we reconnected on our favorite bar's balcony that overlooked the bright lights of Hillwood… that night forever changed my life.

I could only hope it would provide that same luck tonight as we stood together, once again, on the bar's balcony while looking out at our hometown on a quiet autumn evening.

"You know, Arnoldo," Helga said after taking a swig from the bottle she was holding, "I was kind of surprised you wanted to come to this joint on our anniversary of all days."

Smirking at her statement, I shrugged my shoulders. "The balcony here is nice. I like looking out at the city, don't you?"

"Well, sure," she replied while focusing her attention out on the dotted lights of the faraway buildings that made up the skyline. "But we could have easily done it from somewhere less…" Twisting her body, she glanced behind herself towards the hubbub of noise from within the bar. Turning back around, she returned her gaze outward while finishing her sentiment. "I don't know, somewhere less… cheesy."

"Cheesy?" I intoned while eyeing her carefully. "What do you mean by that?"

"You know," she simply said while fixating her eyes ahead without so much as a flinch in my direction. "Taking me to the same place where we first 'officially' rekindled our relationship. I guess I would have thought you'd pick some fancy-pants restaurant to propose to me at."

My jaw instinctively dropped as I stared at Helga with my mouth agape.

Slowly she turned her head to look at me with a wicked grin. "I like the sentimentality part though," she offered as some kind of consolation prize. "But if you were to take us back somewhere and be all romantic by talking about the past, I would have chosen P.S 118 or something. Now that's a good throwback."

I was still in shock as she spoke; my mind not comprehending that Helga had so easily figured out my plans and then called me out on them without so much as a care in the world.

It seemed that, yet again, Helga was still one step ahead of me.

"But you… how did you… but," I shook my head while struggling to force out a somewhat-coherent response. "Didn't you, how could you have—"

"Arnold," she deadpanned, though a hint of a smile twitched at the corner of her lips, "You were at Gerald's for four hours the other day. You really think I didn't hear about your little 'plans' from Phoebe?"

"Phoebe told you?" I repeated in shock. "Phoebe. She's smarter than that, Helga. Why on earth would she think it was okay to tell you something this important?!" I exclaimed and Helga remained unphased; merely tilting her head in thought before looking away from me again.

Casually, she explained, "I never said she thought it was okay. I mean, criminy, I practically had to force it out of her."

"And you did that because…?"

Helga let out a chuckle before fully turning her entire body to face me directly. "I've been waiting for you to propose to me for years now, Arnold. Years." I could feel heat beginning to rise and fill in my cheeks. "Honestly, I was about ready to propose to you, and then Phoebe kept telling me that I couldn't do that because our anniversary was coming up so then I told her that it was the perfect time to propose, then one thing led to another and—"

"She didn't actually tell you, then, did she." I finished for her in a statement rather than a question, and Helga let out a heavy sigh.

"She didn't have to tell me," Helga said with a twinge of humor beneath her tone. "By the way she acted, I knew immediately what you were up to."

Silence settled between us and I fought the urge to explode in anger, frustration, and sheer disappointment. How was it that I was still so incapable of surprising Helga? How was it that even after all of this time, I was still that dense little boy unable to catch up to Helga and be the first to admit something for once.

How was it that I was somehow perpetually in the fourth grade, avoiding acting on my feelings?

Impulsively, I grabbed Helga's hand and began pulling her towards the inside of the bar, "C'mon," I told her as she followed along with an inquisitive set of eyes. "We're going somewhere."

"Where?" She scoffed out. "I thought you were going to ask me to marry you…"

"Oh, I am," I answered immediately and in a firm tone. "But I'm not doing it here."

"Ahh, a field trip, I see," Helga replied as we dodged and weaved our way through the drunken crowd of dancers cluttering the small bar. "And just where is it you have decided to take me for this romantic gesture?"

"Somewhere you won't be expecting this time," I told her with about 86% certainty. "At least… I hope."

As she set her half-empty bottle on a table that we passed by in pursuit of the door out, we finally exited the bar and began making our way down the sidewalk. I led us forward with determination while Helga trailed along in my wake; her longer legs allowing her to keep at my pace with ease.

"Seriously, what are you up to, Hair Boy?" Her tone was becoming almost nervous, and it only heightened my confidence that this new destination was where I should have brought her in the first place. It was a deep-seeded memory that we hadn't discussed since we were teenagers. This had to be the perfect place for a proposal.

This had to be it.

Continuing to drag her along, Helga's eyes shifted to take in her surroundings. Her brows furrowed as she tried to piece together the strange environment that I was leading her through—an old part of Hillwood that had been long forgotten. Most everything on each block had either been abandoned or demolished; the promises of new complexes and mini-malls now only graffitied rubble lost to the recent economic recession.

"Do you even know where we are?" Helga continued to try and coax my true purpose out of me. "You do realize that if we're lost, I am not paying for the taxi back."

It was a backhanded joke that signaled Helga was out of her element. I knew her tactics by now and she was currently baffled as to what was in store. The fact that I was going to propose tonight was already out in the open and there was no pretending it wasn't still going to happen. The way it was going to happen, however… now that was going to be vastly different.

I just hoped I was going to be able to pull it off. I didn't exactly have the greatest track record with speaking my feelings on the fly, but maybe that was for the best. In fact, by doing this completely unrehearsed, Helga would know that my words—as jumbled and clunky as they may come out—would be directly from the heart, my heart. Unrehearsed. Unpolished. Unfiltered.

Pulling Helga to a stop as we reached the corner of an unassuming block hidden in the outskirts of Hillwood, the two of us stood in place in front of a small building. Inside the window was a faded, 'For Lease' sign, and the cement that made up the foundation was filled with cracks that had allowed wild weeds to spurt from the ground and wiggle their way up towards the sky. At first glance, the building was old and decrepit—absolutely nothing special and certainly not somewhere worthy of a marriage proposal.

Glancing around at where I'd brought her, Helga eyed the building carefully before slowly turning to face me. "An abandoned building? What's so special about this place? There's nothing here."

"Exactly," I answered as Helga's brow raised in curiosity. "There isn't anything here. Not now, anyway." Looking over my shoulder, I gestured towards the dilapidated structure before continuing my thought. "It's been a lot of different things in the past, though."

"Oh really?" Helga humored me while letting go of my hand to cross her arms loosely over her chest. "Like what?"

"A clothing boutique. A tailoring company. I'm pretty sure there was a craft store in here too at one point—"

"What in the hell does any of that have to do with—" Helga interrupted, though I didn't allow her to keep talking.

Instead, I finished my sentence by asserting dominance and talking over her as she unsuccessfully tried to speak over me. "—but before all of that, this was a daycare."

Helga's eyes widened minimally, though she remained silent as if to give me the chance to continue.

And that's exactly what I did.

"Not so much a daycare as it was a pre-school, though."

More silence settled between us as Helga's eyes drifted from mine to look at the run-down building she hadn't recognized. "Urban Tots," she muttered out as though it were an afterthought rather than a declaration of acknowledgement.

At her fixation towards our old pre-school, I took the opportunity to shakily get down on one knee; my hand fumbling to reach the small box I'd been hiding inside the pocket of the jeans I was wearing. Pulling it out, Helga's eyes returned to me; water gathering at the base of her vision as she looked down at me with laser-focus.

"Helga," I began precariously, though I tried to keep myself calm as I turned the blue-velvet box over and over in my hands anxiously. "As you've proven tonight, you are and always have been one step ahead of me. Since the moment we met, something in you had the wherewithal to know that we weren't just classmates in some random neighborhood in a random city in this random universe we find ourselves living in. Something inside of you knew that we were more than that. It knew… you knew that we were so much more, that we were… that we are, soulmates."

"Arnold," Helga breathed out, but I held up a finger to stop her from saying anything else and throwing me off of my groove.

"Do you remember when we were fifteen?" I started and Helga smirked while staring at me incredulously. "You told me that you had loved me from the moment you first saw me which, to be fair, wasn't the first time you'd told me that, but I asked you when that was, when you had first seen me."

A small laugh escaped Helga as she recalled the moment I was referencing. "You'd never asked me that before. It was a stupid question."

"Not really," I countered while adjusting from where I knelt on the pavement; my knee suddenly telling me that I'd chosen the wrong time to begin kneeling. Unfortunately, it was definitely too late now to get back up, so I instead took a deep breath to calm my angry kneecap and proceeded with my story. "It's funny because the memories that I have of you and things you've done or random conversations and moments we've shared… they're different than your memories."

"How do you figure?" Helga pressed and I knitted my brows together while trying to find the most effective way to explain my thoughts.

"You have a whole other set of memories that I don't remember because, at the time, they didn't mean anything to me yet. Just like some of my memories don't align with yours because they weren't as significant to you as they were to me in that moment." I took in a sharp breath before finalizing, "A lot of your memories are different because you've known about us a lot longer than I ever did."

"Long before there even was an us, you dingus," Helga chuckled out, and I rolled my eyes at her comment.

"Anyway," I emphasized before pressing onward. "You told me all about that day, that day back at Urban Tots when we apparently first met—a memory I had never actively remembered but suddenly did as you told your side of the story. It was one of the first times you broke down that wall, completely destroyed it to bare your soul to me without insults or nicknames or jokes to cover up the raw truth. You told me about what happened before you got to the pre-school, about Olga and your parents and the rain and your lunch and-and…"

I had to stop myself because the rambling had begun to rear its ugly head. Taking a moment to collect myself, I inhaled deeply before re-routing my conversational direction so I could get back on track with the task at hand.

"I never forgot that story," I admitted while looking down at the ring box I was still playing with in my grip. "You went back to the casual bullying and nicknames, both of us knowing how we felt about each other, but I never forgot that story. Each night I'd lay in my bed staring up through the skylight at the stars and imagine that memory I'd forgotten over and over again. Your pink overalls covered in mud. That sad look in your eye. It was like you'd never been loved… like you didn't know what it meant to be loved or to love another person."

Helga chewed on her lip for a moment as though trying to find the right thing to say—something she didn't typically struggle with. After a moment, she settled on, "What's your point. Aren't proposals supposed to be romantic or something? Not some… excuse to go drudging up my messed-up past and all of the memories that I've worked really hard to forget—"

"I know, I know," I tried to subdue her before she could indulge any further in the anger that was rapidly bubbling up inside of her. "What I am saying, is that the little girl who stood right here all of those years ago… that unloved toddler is gone now, Helga. She's long gone, okay?"

Her deep azure gaze bore into me as I kept talking; my knee now completely numbed from any pain or feeling as my body began to follow suit from nervousness alone. "The woman who stands before me isstill the same feisty, stubborn, thoughtful, smart, talented… and amazing person she has always been, but unloved?" I shook my head a couple of times. "That girl from long ago and the woman of now and forevermore is not unloved. She never will be or feel unloved, ever again. And that's something that I can and do promise you."

With that, I at last presented the box and carefully opened it to reveal a golden engagement ring with an opal at its center. Surrounding the stone was a halo of small diamonds; the ring itself appearing as the most dazzling of flowers attached to a plain gold band. The ring sparkled effortlessly under the glow of the moonlight, though the sky threatened its romantic lighting with oncoming and fast-moving storm clouds.

As Helga's eyes went back and forth between the ring and myself, I kept talking; the next set of words something I had always planned to say no matter where I ended up proposing. "Helga G. Pataki, you have been my bully for as long as I can remember. You teased me relentlessly and never stopped giving me attention, no matter how much I thought I didn't want it. You confessed to me time after time that you loved me and yet, even after all of this time, I've never confessed how I feel to you—at least, not entirely. So, I guess… well… here goes."

Nodding her head for me to keep going, she pressed her lips together in a tight line as though trying to hold back the tears I could see pooling in her eyes.

"I love you. I'm head over heels, wildly, desperately, endlessly in love with you, Helga," my words were earnest; genuine. Each sentence I said with the utmost care and sincerity. "I don't just want to have you in my life, I need you in my life. I need your nicknames, your teasing, your each and every thought, your embrace… your everything because you are my everything. And this ring—" I took it out of its box and held out the specifically-chosen engagement ring for her approval, "—I chose it for a reason."

"The opal," I said while using my other hand to point to the main stone, "it's iridescent. It looks like one color, but it never really ever stays that way. It changes and evolves and looks different under whatever light is shining on it—and yet it always somehow stays the same. And that's us. That's our love. We've always loved each other. It may have looked different as we grew, but it's always been there. And if you marry me… I promise that it will always continue to be there."

Swallowing hard, Helga let out a tidbit of her own, "I thought opals had to do with love and passion," she paused for a moment before adding, "and desire. Seduction. Are you trying to get in my pants, Shortman?"

"Always," I admitted which made Helga giggle; a few stray tears jiggling loose from her laughter. "But yes, those are the other reasons why I picked it. Every time you look down at this stone, you will know that I love you. That I desire you and to be with you. That I want you passionately in every meaning and interpretation of the word. That I will be faithful, and loyal until my very last breath. With this ring… I promise that you will never, ever, ever spend another second of your life being a muddy little girl who doesn't know what love is. I will spend every moment of my life proving to you and showing you and making up for all of those times when you needed love and didn't have it."

The two of us stared at each other as I held the ring out towards her, my arm growing more tired with each second that passed. Our eyes remained locked on one another as eons, and decades, and lifetimes seemed to happen while I agonized over her answer. Why wasn't she saying yes? I'd shown her the ring… she knew what I was doing… so why hadn't she accepted yet? Was she not going to accept? Worry fluttered through my mind as a sudden thought filled my senses, What if she doesn't want to get married?

As I lost myself in my thoughts, the clearing of Helga's throat brought me back to reality; her eyes no longer wet with tears and instead looking down at me skeptically. "Hey Arnold?" She asked me and I blinked my eyes a couple of times to refocus my attention on the current moment. "I'd love to say 'yes' here and put on this super sexy and seductive ring you've so thoughtfully picked out for me—"

"Well, my mom helped…"

"Of course Stella did," Helga affirmed with a smirk before sucking in a deep breath of air. "But the whole point of a marriage proposal, as nice as your words were and all… well, you kind of left out one very, very important part."

"…huh?" was all I could manage as I stared up at her in horror.

A sly smile spread across Helga's face. "You haven't actually asked me anything yet."

"Oh god," I mumbled while shutting my eyes in utter embarrassment. "Oh, god, I just… I got so caught up in all of this and then I kneeled way too early—"

"I know!" Helga exclaimed in amusement. "Your knee must be killing you right now."

"Eh," I quickly dismissed, "I stopped having feeling in my kneecap about a minute in so you might need to help me up—"

"Because you're an old man, now. Yeah, I know," Helga teased before sighing and tilting her head slightly. "You're only getting older the longer you wait, Footballhead."

"Yeah. Yes, of course. Right. Okay," pushing through the numbness of my knee and the nervousness I still felt for no reason at all, I held the ring out once again and looked deep into Helga's ocean blue eyes. "Helga G. Pataki. Will you marry me?"

Her smile widened to reveal a toothy grin. "Criminy, Arnold. I thought you'd never ask."

As I slipped the ring onto its new home of Helga's finger, she helped to yank me up from where I'd potentially done permanent damage to my left knee.

I didn't even care.

From where the two of us kissed under the moonlight at what remained of Urban Tots Pre-School, I knew that the Helga and Arnold who had once occupied this exact spot years ago were long gone. And as the sky at last opened up, allowing buckets of rain to downpour on us, we laughed while getting soaked to the bone because this time, the rain itself didn't matter.

The only umbrella Helga needed was one made entirely of love. And, just like when we were mere toddlers, I was happy to provide it for her. Not only in the rain, but through every storm we may weather and every warm day that is enjoyed safely under the shade.

For Helga, I was prepared to hold that umbrella over her for the rest of our lives.

And I couldn't wait.

#shortaki #shortakiweek #shortakiweek2020 #shortaki week 2020 #shortaki week #hey arnold #heyarnold #helga g pataki #helga pataki #arnold shortman #helga and arnold #helga x arnold #writing prompt #fanfiction #fanfic

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callistochan87 · 3 years

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whyyyyyyyyyy am I like this??

I’m reading C.S. Lakin’s Layer Your Novel: The Innovative Method for Plotting Your Scenes, and it’s making me rethink CS? I had an idea, one I’m not sure I’m thrilled with, but one that would require a rewrite if I did it. But I’m not committed yet, if at all—it’s just an idea that won’t go away but I don’t know enough about it to get attached. I’d actually need to plot it, using the techniques in the book (hence why I’m reading- actually I forgot I’d purchased it until I was poking around my Kindle library so I guess it’s like a present from me to me lol)

But I also wanted to use that same approach to properly tool out what I had now, or as much as I can when I’m 9-10 chapters into a 30-chapter book. These two ideas are at war with each other (it be easier to plot from the start! But you like the ideas you have, you just need to organize the plot through 5 different characters! But do I need 5 POVs when I can have one? You had one and didn’t like it that’s why you switched to multiple!!!)

What I was thinking of doing was trying her layering approach, since I find I’m getting tired of writing without much of a direction. It leads to long scenes, rambling scenes, and chapters that are too long and too unfocused and I’m already sick of the “oH nO i’D lOvE tO wRiTe ThAt MuCh.” Yeah it probably doesn’t take you days to churn something out and your plot probably moves at a pace faster than “glacial”. It sucks the fun out of writing and makes it a chore

There’s always been some aspect of that to writing, but usually I can find some enjoyment out of it or some scene I really want to write. This just sucks the passion out of it and like CS is 95% painful exposition at this point, settings things up for a payoff that’s not really a payoff. Most of the characters are passive. The plot happens to then but they don’t influence the plot and DON’T GET ME STARTED on the antagonist thing

I know these flaws and yet I can’t fix them? Or I know these flaws and everyone tells me to stop being so picky

Anyway I’ve been feeling pretty shitty creative-wise for a long while and so I’m game to try anything that actually might make it easier and give me a clear outline, because lol clearly I’m incapable of doing it myself. It might help if I actually, you know, finish reading the book to see what the method is (I read for about 20 minutes before bed on my Kindle, so it’s small chunks) but right now I don’t know if I can stop to plot things out, let alone plot things out for 5 characters. Hell, Eric and Shelby get the shaft really, I can’t figure out what their plots are.

I know what I want Chris, Konnie, and Julia to do. And I like the multi-POV because the one thing I struggled with when it was just Chris’ POV was how to incorporate things they were doing without her (because of course they would). This at least gives them experiences unique to them, glimpses into their head while still keeping a similar plot (compared to what little I read of the first GoT book where the characters had completely different stories and I didn’t get far enough to see any of them converge).

BUT at the same time Chris’ goal is probably the most relevant to the plot so idk

Like I said I should probably finish reading the book first and actually see what the method is

And I know I don’t need to be relying on books and that I should JuSt WrItE wHaT i WaNt but we have seen how that turned out and by God if there is something I can follow to make this easier, to make the plot more concise, to do something besides stagnating and hating writing and essentially putting nearly through the wringer (sleep lol what is this sleep) then I will do it

But also this idea is nagging at me, while the other part of me says “bitch you already have ideas that work you just need to structure them better, stop being flaky”, so. You know. I’m pretty exhausted and also why. Why am I so indecisive about this. I never used to be. There was a period where I put out stuff regularly (still rambling, still long, but at least I finished)

Just

Why am I like this?? Ugh so frustrating

#my stories #text post

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sleeplessvalley · 3 years

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actually you know what. that post reminded me of something and uhhhh

buckle up it's time for me rambling about splat2n stuff (mostly oe) and a bit of something else as well though it won't be getting stated directly.

this has a whole lotta headcanons, and a lot of it is put down in a jumble bc I have adhd and am completely incapable of putting things down in a way that makes sense to everyone else and not just to me. aNYWAYS

I've seen a couple posts from a while ago about how the japanese and the english versions of tartar's dialogue imply different things? something about how like... in the japanese version he actually comes across as having legitimate reasons for wanting to destroy the world and start anew, something something I don't feel like finding the post tbh and it's actually been a bit since I've read it myself so I'm probably not 100% correct on it.

anyways if you've known me for long enough or have been following this blog for a while you'll know that I am OBSESSED with this bastard telephone. to the point that I have about 15 different versions of him and apparently am not showing any signs of stopping.

so, to recap very quickly:

Commander Tartar is an AI created by a human scientist referred to only as "the professor" 12,000 years before the events of Splatoon 2. Its purpose was to pass down all of humanity's knowledge to the next capable species. The professor's intention to do so was to prevent the next intelligent species from repeating the same mistakes that lead humanity to extinction. However, due to spending all those millennia isolated and alone, the AI's thought process ended up going in a different direction.

Commander Tartar initially saw hope in the Inklings and Octarians, but eventually became repulsed by their evolution, needless wars, and fashion obsession, ultimately concluding that they were unfit for its knowledge and reprogramming itself to create a new form of life that would be worthy of its patronage, while annihilating the existing lifeforms on Earth.

taken directly from the wiki, because I am also not in the mood to summarize myself (despite knowing all this very, very well)

honestly? I don't think tartar hated cephalokind.

I think he loved them too much.

think about it for a sec. this is a sentient AI that was created by a professor that didn't want the next lifeforms to become extinct just like humans did. assuming that the professor treated tartar exactly like a fellow human, he went on to spend the next 10,000 years alone. and he had so much time to think.

humans became extinct because of the rising water levels. what caused that? for the sake of sticking with the whole water thing we'll say global warming. what caused global warming? many things, one of the most notable being the burning of fossil fuels in the industry. why does that happen? one could amount it to the industrial revolution. and the industrial revolution also contributed to wars.

an AI that was created to pass on humanity's knowledge would probably also be able to access all these things- and more- whenever it wanted, and 10,000 years is a long time. tartar probably read over so many things so many times and eventually reached his own conclusions about what the best things to tell the next lifeforms NOT to do would be.

and then the mollusc era started. tartar, from wherever he was, was able to watch the mollusc era from the moment it began, was able to watch cephalokind grow and develop at a rate that was equal to how humans developed, was able to have hope for the first time in years.

that hope was gone once the Great Turf War started.

things had been going so well; despite the water levels rising some, cephalokind was flourishing. everyone got along (more or less. someday I might get into salmonid stuff more but that day isn't today) and technology was advancing in ways humanity wasn't able to achieve. and then it hit the point that there was a shortage of land, and war broke out.

tartar spend 12,000 years waiting; 10,000 were spent in complete isolation, 1,900 were spent watching cephalokind grow, and for this I'm going to say that the last 100 years were spent doing all that stuff that happens in the octo expansion (and by this I mean creating the metro, having all those test subjects, agent 8, right up until destruction). honestly if we take the date the og splatoon came out (may 28th, 2015) we can argue that the great turf war is meant to parallel our WWI, especially if the calendar was recreated during the mollusc era because then the dates are... actually eerily similar:

if we take may 28th, 2015 and take away 100 years that gives us may 28th, 1915

WWI started july 28th, 1914, and ended november 11th, 1918

may 28th, 1915 literally lands in the middle of our WWI

I mean COME ON. that's uncanny.

back to my main point: the industrial revolution contributed to wars and also to the burning of fossil fuels, which contributed to global warming, which contributed to rising water levels.

tartar is watching all this happen just like it did to humanity (except slightly out of order), and to make things worse, not only are inklings more concerned with fashion, once the great turf war is over inklings start playing turf war for fun. one could also say that the splatfests are actually worse than turf war, because it forces inklings to pick a side and then fight for it- everyone wins something if they participate, but the losing team also has to accept that the winning team's side is better according to... whatever splatfest law it is.

---

(kind of off-track, but this also kind of parallels something in the great turf war as stated in the sunken scrolls, which I've pulled the summary of from the wiki as well:

[...] and the Inklings' victory over the Octarians was most likely due to their superior number of limbs.

there was another bit to this, but I can't find it. I remember some stuff about this being stated to be propaganda though.)

---

assuming tartar loved humanity, he also grew to love cephalokind for the same reasons (something like how a mother will get attached to the baby growing inside her even if that child is going to get adopted for some reason or other). and he didn't want to see another species go extinct just like humans did. so what does he do? he decides to destroy the world, and start over by finding capable cephalopods and unifying them (the primordial ooze from which the ultimate lifeform will emerge. I think that's how the line went, anyway.) so that it won't have to happen like that

everyone can just... not have to worry about failing to live a long life. everyone can be happy, and have their place in the world, and love one another.

if you think about it all at once? it seems sort of extreme. but also: we're human. if we have a friend going down the wrong path/in trouble or a family member or pet or- I don't know, some material object- we tend to go to extremes to help sometimes. and if you're raised by a human, even if you're different, you might do the same thing

#daitex.t #long post #splatoon 2 #commander tartar #octo expansion #I have been working on this for... almost two hours jfjcjbsjd #going to go rest brain now

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lennonknowsmysins · 4 years

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lessons in attraction

beatle: george

summary: a man-bunned george learns that you’ve had a guitar lesson. he quickly fixes that.

warnings: uh iss kinda cute

a/n: i’ve been thinking a lot about this concept but i wasn’t sure how to start it so i apologize that the beginning is kinda weird. also i’m on the final season of glee and its put me in a really weird mood for some reason. i’m really fucking attracted to georgie with a man bun and also this specific guitar i find really pretty.

You didn’t know why the boys were seeming incapable of putting their instruments away themselves but you didn’t mind doing it yourself. At least it got you out of doing something more boring. As it turned out, being the Beatles assistant was a much more low-key job than you originally thought. Or at least so long as you didn’t get into the middle of anyone’s arguments.

Paul gave you an easy smile as he handed you his bass, chuckling softly as you reacted to the weight of it before following the others out. Humming the tune they’d been working on as you carefully settled the bass back into it’s case, followed by John’s electric

You stopped when you got to George’s acoustic guitar, admiring the flowers adorning it. Side eyeing the door, you slid the instrument onto your lap, your nerves shooting up. If someone walked in on you fondling George Harrison’s guitar, you’d surely be fired. Or humiliated, considering you had no idea how to play. Or both. Probably both. But you had the chance now, you might as well take it.

The strings felt surprising rough against the pads of your fingers as you ran your fingers along them. Your hand was shaking, either because you shouldn’t be doing this or because you didn’t know how to do this, but the guitar made a pleasant sound that made you smile as you strummed it. You stroked the strings again, trying to think of what positions George’s fingers had made. Clumsily, you copied what you remembered, whining as it made a buzzing sound and letting out a small cheer when you finally seemed to play it right.

“I didn’t know you played.”

You shot straight up when you heard the smooth voice. Turning around, you were met face to face with George in all of his man bun glory, who was leaning against the door frame with an amused smirk.

“Mr. Harrison, I am so sorry! I know that I’m not supposed to but it was just there and-” You rambled, holding the guitar in front of you like it was a shield. He cut you off by holding his finger up as he strode over to you, eyeing you up and down. He was going to fire. He was totally going to fire you. “I’m really sorry.” You squeaked, unsure of what else to do.

“It’s okay, I’m not mad.” He said easily. You stood still, your mouth opening and closing while you stared at him with wide eyes. He put his hand on your shoulder, “Relax, honey, it’s okay.”

“You’re not going to fire me?” You whispered sheepishly.

“’m not gonna fire you.” He chuckled, squeezing your bicep. “So you play then?”

You shook your head, still a little on edge. “I don’t. I always wanted to learn how but I never did.”

“Why not?” He asked, his eyebrow quirked. You shrugged

“I see.” He nodded in thought for a moment.

“Why don’t you put that one away and let’s try... er where’d it go...” He mumbled, beginning to search the studio. “Here it is.”

He came back to you with a shorter guitar, holding it up, “This one’s got a skinnier neck so it’ll be easier on those little fingers of your’s.”

You blushed at his comment, butterflies forming as he grinned, his little fangs gleaming. You’d never noticed them before.

“C’mere, this’ll be better sitting down.” You took a seat next to him on the couch, trying to ignore how his thigh brushed against your’s.

He pulled the strap across your shoulder before bringing his arm behind you. You froze when he took your hands- the left one first, positioning your fingers in a certain order.

“This is G chord. You make this position here and then use this hand,” now he took your right hand, bringing it to the body, “to strum with your thumb.”

He took his hands away, letting you try. You successfully play the chord, earning an approving hum from George.

“Good job, sweetheart. Now, let’s try a D chord.” George moved your fingers again, his beard scratching lightly against your cheek. You play the new chord with ease, straightening up with pride. “Very good! Do you remember where your fingers were for the G chord?”

You brought fingers back to where they were originally, struggling a little to get the correct shape. “Like that, right?”

“Okay, now go back to where you were for the D chord.” He nodded when you did so. “Alright, now play a G chord, then play a D chord.”

Furrowing your brow, you play the G, then huff as the D comes out as an unpleasant buzz. You try again, only for the D to buzz a second time. You feel your face heat up, embarrassed that you’re currently making a fool of yourself in front of the lead guitarist of the Beatles.

“Hey, it’s alright, it’s alright.” He comforted, rubbing your arms, “This isn’t the easiest at first, but I’ve got you. Let’s try again, this time, make sure that your fingers aren’t too flat against the strings.”

Once more, you played the short harmony, this time correctly.

“Hey, you’ve got it!” He praised, squeezing your waist as you giggle. “And that is basically the chorus of Yellow Submarine.”

“Thank you Mr. Harrison.” You laughed, looking back at him.

“Call me George.” He said softly, meeting your eyes.

“Thank you... George. And thank you for not being mad for touching your guitar.”

He brushed a stray hair from your face, finger lingering on your cheek. “I think we need to get you your own guitar. You’ve got potential to replace me.”

You shook your head, “I could never, the band would fall apart without you.”

George was about to say something else when the door opened and Ringo walked in, looking questionably at the sight of you basically sitting his band member’s lap.

“Training your replacement, Georgie?”

“Something like that.” He murmured, helping you off the couch and to slip the guitar off. “We’ll have to continue this.”

George winked and joined the drummer at the other end of the room. You stood, staring in his direction in awe of what had just happened.

Did George Harrison have a thing for you?

#george harrison x reader #george harrison #the beatles x reader #beatles x reader #the beatles #bruh #classic rock x reader

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saladejin · 4 years

Text

Solace (M) | 04

4-part Jimin x Reader | fantasy au, school au, magic user!Jimin | Fluff, angst (basically unresolved), smut with some plot

Summary: Why not spice up your high school life with a teleporting boy of your very own? You find yourself not having a choice in the matter. While he figures out how to fix his mistakes, strap yourself in for an adventure to remember…

Warnings: Angst, blowjobs, masturbation, Jimin gets a little desperate and rough lol

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 5.8k

A/N: Just another reminder that this is some super early writing from me, so I’ve steadily been trying to improve from the time I originally posted this. I just wanted something on my blog to remind me of when I started out, because I hope to still be around and writing for many years to come :)

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“Can you hear them this time?”

You worried at your lip with your teeth watching Jimin struggle in front of you. You were still at school, but after another hour passed things had gone a little pear shaped in the magical department. You tried to see how he was going while the teacher rambled on in the background.

“It was so faint, the voices. Now there’s nothing,” Jimin whispered, throat tightening as he tried to contain his frustration.

Someone cleared their throat and you looked up to see the teacher throwing a suspicious glance in your direction. You couldn’t risk getting any more heat so you zipped your lips for the remainder of the lesson, only exchanging gazes with the boy next to you occasionally.

The ride home on the bus lasted forever. Jimin had tried so hard to activate the codes in the book since he had told you about it, and even now he couldn’t pay attention to the conversations of his friends around him because of it. You watched in silence while he bore holes into the stained pages in front of him.

When you both reached the house you said nothing and made a beeline for your bedroom. Nothing mattered more than the book and its contents at this point. Schoolbags were thrown into the corner of the room and Jimin’s tie even got discarded along with them due to his amounting stress.

“There’s something not quite right, I don’t know what I’m doing wrong,” He growled, not only running his hands through his hair but ripping them through instead.

“Jimin,” You warned, not liking the settling panic taking control of his voice and actions.

“I heard him, I did!”

“Jimin! Jimin stop,” You demanded. His voice died away and you felt your resolve tremble as a tiny whimper fell from his lips in response. He was on the verge, and you had no idea on how to help him in a way that would be useful. The book lay splayed open on your bed as you pulled the frazzled boy into your arms.

“Freaking out won’t do anything, come on, you just need to think a little. Nothing is going anywhere so you don’t have to rush this much, okay?” You soothed. You reached upwards and tugged his hands away from his head.

“I know you’re right,” He grunted lowly, “I just need you to understand how crucial this is, (Y/n).”

It would have stung a little that he didn’t believe in your level of understanding, but his harsh tone was overruled when he brought his hands up to hold your face carefully. He inhaled deeply and rested his forehead on your own, forcing you to meet his pointed gaze undeterred.

“I do know how important this is. This is your ticket home Jimin,” You protested, bringing your own hands up to envelop his warmer ones over your cheeks. He scanned the feelings flitting across your expression closely, as if you were the book of codes instead. You thought about your words again. It was his ticket home, his only one at this point, but that also meant something else. It meant he would be leaving you.

Fuck, I think I’m in love with you Jimin. No, I know I am.

You didn’t dare voice the thoughts aloud. Hearing the words out in the open would surely kill you, and it would make everything that much harder to deal with. No, you thought. Keeping it in would make it seem less real and terrifying. If you kept it to yourself you wouldn’t have to believe it, and in turn he wouldn’t have to live his life knowing he’d broken your heart.

“(Y/n)-”

“Jimin! The book is glowing!” You gasped, ripping your eyes away from his coffee irises and forcefully pushing his body towards the bed.

There, the pages of the book were illuminated in a soft tangible glow. It seemed like energy was pulsating from its flaky surface, a visible energy source you had never seen in your entire life.

It’s the power, must be the same power Jimin uses.

You knew your revelation was confirmed to be true when Jimin’s eyes lit up with recognition. He scrambled for the object like a starved wolf. He needed to know his fate before it was too late to fix it all.

“There’s a timer, I think I need to somehow complete the connection before it runs out,” Jimin murmured, trailing a dainty finger over the surface of the page in interest.

“How long?” You questioned while fiddling with your fingers, half of you wanting him to say something like a minute while the other half wanted weeks more with him. You couldn’t let yourself be selfish at a time like this. Your heart was at the bottom of the picking line, whereas priorities mattered more than it could ever hope to achieve and win against.

“A day, 24 hours. I’ll need to put all my energy and time into keeping the connection alive right now.”

He looked up at you through his dark lashes, but you couldn’t figure out what the look meant. Why was he looking sorry all of a sudden? A moment ago he had been leaping for joy over finding his escape, or panicking over not being able to go through with it at times.

“Well, go on,” You urged, taking a seat across from him with widened eyes. He was so close. Everything was about to fall into place.

“Okay, I’m not sure how I’ll go,” He inhaled sharply and gritted his teeth, jerking his head back to sweep his hair out of the way before laser focusing his eyes onto the pages below. You watched the man before you in awe as his mind worked its magic. The way his irises swirled with golden colours you had never noticed before. The way his skin gleamed in the shitty lighting of your room, in some areas slightly clammy from the exertion.

You almost had to avert your gaze when he flickered his eyes in your direction. For some reason, it looked like pity was drawn across his features. Maybe he was legitimately feeling sorry for you and your incapability to focus on anything else but him.

God, I mean if he’s about to vanish from my life then let me fucking look.

You couldn’t help but sigh. Were you ever going to meet someone like him again? You were pretty much prepared to live the rest of your life pining for the random man who had appeared in your classroom one distasteful morning. Maybe you would find someone else, but that thought sat heavy in your mind. You didn’t want anyone else, you wanted Jimin and you always would.

Stop thinking about it before you cry in front of him, idiot.

You flicked the off switch to your mind before things could get too chaotic. You would deal with the thoughts and feelings later, now there were bigger things to worry about.

“I’m-I think I’m almost there,” A sudden gasp for air brought you slamming back down to Earth. Jimin’s eyes were screwed shut in effort while his brow gleamed with the evident sweat. You didn’t know what else to do but encourage him with your presence. You were too scared to speak or touch him in fear of interfering with the process. He panted quietly for a few more minutes, but you only waited in stunned silence.

“Shit, I don’t have the energy or power to bridge it,” He sighed in defeat, shoulders suddenly slumping as he came hurtling out of the trance. You held your breath and waited for his next move.

“What now? Do you try again later?” You prompted eventually. You were worried at how exhausted he looked, as if concentrating for those few minutes had completely drained him of what little power he had left for the day.

“I can, it will be a lot to build back up from though. That was the closest I’ve ever been, so that’s a good thing.”

Your brows knitted together in concern. The longer he waited the more his connection ebbed away from him. He needed to make it now or he would have to work that much harder for it later on. You had to get him to agree to what you were about to propose.

“Jimin…”

His eyes blinked owlishly as you moved to straddle him out of the blue. He barely had enough strength to bring his hand to rest on your hip, but somehow he managed and even gave the exposed skin of your thigh a slight pinch on his way up.

You gently pressed your lips to his softer ones after a couple of tension filled seconds. He was shocked at first, but responded to your head tilting to deepen the kiss further. He was trying to go along with you but the broken whimper that greeted your ears showed that he was too fatigued to get everything worked up.

“(Y/n) I think I know what you’re doing but I can’t-”

“You need power, yes?” You cut him off calmly.

“Definitely, but I need to rest a bit to actually restore it. I don’t think I could hold myself up,” He groaned, biting his lip to try and stop himself from following your mouth when you drew away. His lidded eyes were striking you with waves of arousal.

“Then you won’t have to,” You smirked and kissed him deeply again. This time you parted your lips a little more so you could let your tongue meet with his. He groaned slightly again and his grip on your body tightened in uncontrolled thirst. You held his cheeks to keep his head in place while you gave your all into the way your tongue explored his heated mouth. If you couldn’t tell him you loved him then you would have to resort to showing it through this.

When you broke away for air again the room was only filled with the sounds of both of you gasping for air. Jimin shifted underneath you, and you were pleased to feel his hardness growing even despite his weariness.

“(Y/n) you’re killing me, what do you mean?” He whined, but at this point you were finding every sound he made sexy as all hell.

“I mean, does oral sex count?”

His breath hitched and you heard his audible swallow as he considered your words. The arousal swirling in his eyes was undeniable when you licked your bottom lip suggestively.

“Oh yes, yes it definitely does,” He grunted excitedly, picking up on your wavelength and throwing his head back when you moved your languid kisses from his neck down to his abdomen. You were now lowered onto your knees on the bedroom floor while he scooted towards the edge of the bed almost immediately. He helped you by ripping the shirt from his body and shucking his school pants in a heartbeat. You unbuttoned your own dress so he could have full viewing access of your bra-clad breasts the entire time.

“Are you sure? I don’t think you’ve given me a blowjob yet.” Jimin lolled his head to the side and stuck his tongue into the side of his cheek. You found the look very attractive, and it wasn’t helping your underwear considering the sorry state they were already in.

“I’m dead serious, and I need you to take as much energy as you need to finish that connection,” You ordered, bringing one gentle hand towards his clothed crotch so you could palm him over his boxers. A sigh left his lips at the much needed pressure, and you found yourself wanting to pull as many beautiful noises as you could from him.

“Plus, if I had blown you…you would remember.”

At your sultry statement, Jimin huffed deeply and you felt another wave of heat lick your insides at the low rumble coming from deep within his chest. He was getting harder by the second, and you even felt his cock twitch underneath your hand.

You moaned lightly, feeling the need drive you onward when his member twitched again.“Fuck, I really want you inside me but I can’t wait that long.”

“Don’t be a tease,” He warned deeply, voice raspy with arousal once more. “Taking too much power could kill you, I won’t do it,” He spoke in a clearer voice, as if coming to his senses suddenly. You clicked your tongue in disagreement and tugged his boxers down to let his hardened cock spring free. It was so swollen and angry, begging to be touched in any way possible.

“You will, I’m asking you to,” You met his equally stubborn gaze with your own fiery glare.

“Think about how you’re going to get home. You won’t be able to without my help.”

Jimin’s brows furrowed in consideration, but you saw his resolve crumbling the longer he glanced between his erection and your moistened lips.

“Fine, oh God fine. Just touch me, please.”

You smiled at his desperation. He was too exhausted to move properly, but he still had the common sense to beg if he needed to. You wondered why you had never turned him into putty like this before, because it was proving to be one of your favourite expressions of his.

You locked eyes with him and started to slowly pump him with one hand. You made sure to flick your wrist at just the right time, causing the friction where he needed it the most. More heat gathered at your core when a strangled groan tore from the boy in front of you. His eyes were closed once again and his jaw had slackened slightly. The building sweat continued to stick some strands of his hair to his forehead in his exertion.

To his surprise, you lowered your head and let your tongue stroke the underside of his member from the base to the tip. You could feel how warm he was and became incredibly eager to continue. The hum of pleasure coming from him also urged you onward. You were shocked to find that you were enjoying this as much as you were, because from what you’ve heard it wasn’t always the greatest experience for the giver.

“Oh, fuck yes,” Jimin grunted when you swirled your tongue deftly around the head of his cock. You smiled slightly when his hips jerked further into the heat of your mouth, because seeing him coming undone was absolutely breathtaking.

You felt your hair being gathered behind your head as he wound his fingers deeply into your (h/c) tresses, and even though you thought you should’ve been bothered by it, the idea of him being rough with you caused you to moan loudly. The vibrations from the sound travelled up his length, and you felt him jerk his hips again involuntarily.

“Come on babe, please go faster for me,” He breathed shakily. You let his cock leave your lips with a small pop before pumping him again with your hand. You were stroking quicker this time, hoping to get him a little more worked up before you went all out.

“Please, by all means be rough with me. I almost came when you pulled my hair,” You hummed shyly, more shocked than him at the words coming from your lips. He barely suppressed another groan before smirking slightly and gathering more of your hair into his fist. The way he was biting down on his lip to contain himself forced your hand to move on its own and slip underneath your dress.

“Fuck, that’s hot,” Jimin rasped, darkened eyes focused on your disappearing hand until you enveloped his cock with your awaiting mouth once more. Since you had been quicker with your hand, you made sure to put more effort into wetly sliding up and down his length. Every time you went further and further, until eventually you almost had his entire cock stuffed inside. What you couldn’t fit you held with your free hand so none of him was left unattended.

“Jesus-”

His choked cry of pleasure sparked your movements again. Oxygen was such an annoyance when all you wanted was to do was please him, but your hands still sufficed in those occasional air breaks. You were living for his breathy moans and grunts of strain. You couldn’t even contain your own noises of pleasure since your fingertips had been working your clit expertly at the same time.

“It’s so warm and wet, oh shit I’m about to fuck your mouth,” He groaned, muscular thighs quivering beside your head as you swallowed him down towards the back of your throat. Your tongue worked its own magic by dipping into the slit of his head every once in a while, curling around his shaft and running softly over the rigid veins found there. To put it simply, you knew what you were doing and now Jimin knew too.

“I’m gonna cum soon, oh my God,” He panted, hips now thrusting lightly into you to prove just how close he was.

You felt your own climax drawing near and your fingers sped up their movements almost subconsciously. As you dipped one finger into the wetness of your pussy you felt yourself fall apart, shaking and moaning but still making sure to slide down Jimin’s entire length before stopping yourself. There was no more room for your free hand, because now all of him was settled into your warmth of your mouth.

When you stopped moving due to your staggering orgasm, Jimin took it upon himself to continue grinding his hips backwards and forwards to keep the friction. Your wobbly moans and constant gagging and swallowing caused a sensually wanton whine to explode from the boy. His mouth fell open as he watched his entire cock disappear in between your lips repeatedly.

“Shit, (Y/n) I’m cumming,” He moaned brokenly and soon you felt his hands trying to push you off his throbbing member.

No way, I’m gonna swallow every last drop.

“(Y/n)!” He cried out, unable to stop himself as he came with a guttural groan. You focused your eyes and met his scorching gaze, opening your mouth wide for him to see his salty white cum paint your tongue. Your knees gave out and you smiled lazily, swallowing and giving his softening cock one more kiss for good measure.

There were a few moments of silence as you both caught your breaths, with Jimin tucking himself away as soon as he physically could. You felt like you were about to collapse onto the carpet from the sudden lack of energy, but like always, a pair of sturdy arms were there to catch your fall. You smiled again as you were pulled into Jimin’s secure embrace, but you didn’t want to let yourself fall asleep because that would mean missing the most important moment of the night.

You heard some inaudible whispers, but then your stomach flipped when you heard something like a sob reach your ears. The wetness of a few tears slid down and dampened the light fabric of your dress.

“J-Jimin, you’re crying?” You croaked before clearing your throat self-conciously.

“Yeah, I guess I am,” Came the simple reply followed by a sharp sniff. You felt him shift one arm to wipe the tears from his flushed cheeks. You were so comfortable nestled into his lap on your bed, but now that something so unexpected had happened you felt only alarm gripping at your heart.

“Why, baby?”

Jimin sighed a rickety sigh and hugged you closer to his naked chest. You could hear his heart pounding away from this position.

“I’m just so grateful, so…”

He thought deeply for another few seconds. You could basically hear his mind churning away.

“I don’t know how to explain it. You made me feel so good that I think I just got overwhelmed in the end.”

“Oh, thanks. But also sorry, I guess?” You snorted, licking at your lips to see if there were any hidden traces of him lingering in the corners. You felt his fingers combing your hair away from your face, just as he had done that very first time. He even took the time to button up your dress for you, since your hands were laying limply in your lap.

“No, I’m sorry. I was way too rough with you since it was the first time you’d done that, but I’m glad I didn’t take too much power.”

You would roll your eyes if you could be bothered too, but then you remembered something vital and you felt an adrenaline spike of energy surge through your being and awaken your bones.

“Jimin,” you grunted, “Quick, make the connection before you lose it all!”

The black-haired boy didn’t even think to throw on a shirt. He just nodded and returned his attention to the book beside him with the same burning determination you always loved. The pages were still glowing to your relief, but you were still fearful that you hadn’t been quick enough.

“It’s still there, (Y/n). I can really do it,” He exhaled in amazement.

You felt relief course through your veins, but drowsiness was still tugging at your consciousness. How were you going to see this through to the end? It was as if you were seeing everything through a drunken state of mind.

Everything happened quickly then.

One moment there was nothing but the sound of your laboured breathing. Then, the book shone even brighter and suddenly both you and Jimin were faced with the holographic projection of a large circle floating above the pages. When you tried to focus your eyes on the image in the circle, you saw what seemed to be a rich looking library.

“The study! Hyung, are you there?” Jimin called. You tilted your head upwards to catch his hopeful and excited expression. His hold on you hadn’t loosened at all, if anything it had become fiercer in grip. You didn’t know what was happening, but at least you knew he still cared about you enough to hold you close.

“Jimin-ah?”

There was a muffled voice filtering from the circle. It was crackling, almost like the kind of tone you would hear from a distant phone call. Jimin’s form stiffened underneath your body as he recognised the voice.

It must be his ‘hyung’.

“Jimin-ah, where the fuck are you? Also, this is not my first time seeing you shirtless but this time it’s a little questionable,”

A head appeared from the side of the circle. It was a man with silvery grey hair parted slightly in the middle, with skin seemingly just as perfectly clear as Jimin’s. It was hard to make out from your perspective, but you could tell this man had a sense of authority surrounding him.

“Hyung I’m so, so sorry. I hope you’ll forgive me, I really didn’t mean to mess with the teleportation that badly,” Jimin rambled, voice tightening again as he pleaded for understanding. You didn’t have to see the boy’s face to know he was on the precipice of a breakdown. He reached for his shirt hurriedly to seem presentable.

“I don’t care about that! We don’t care about that. We just need to know where you are so Jin-hyung and I can find the right spell to use,” The man grumbled, obviously irritated beyond belief at the whole situation but still appearing to be worried.

“You don’t want to punish me? Oh, God thank you,” Jimin sighed, the pure relief causing his whole body to relax and slouch.

“Come on, do you think we’re sadists or something? We just want you home,” The man furrowed his dark brows, looking closer at the ‘circle’ to see into the bedroom where his younger friend was currently broadcasting from.

“So…where are you, and who is that girl?”

Jimin swallowed thickly and you felt his body shift as he glanced down at your drowsy expression. You felt so rude for not introducing yourself sooner, but it wasn’t as if you had to energy to do so anyway.

“I’m in (Y/c) Yoongi-hyung, and this is (Y/n).”

Something about the way Jimin spoke your name had your heart missing a beat or two. He sounded so awed and endeared, you really had to wonder if you had heard correctly. You blinked and turned your head so you looked from the circle to Jimin. His warm chocolate gaze met yours when it got there, and you were unable to stop the smile tugging at your lips at the beautiful sight.

“Let me get the others,” Yoongi grunted, shaking his head slightly for some reason before leaving the frame. You could see the library a bit clearer now, but your vision was still swimming pretty badly.

“So, he seems…nice,” You giggled quietly, hoping Jimin could still hear you despite your weakened vocal ability.

“Hyung can be prickly at times, but we love him regardless. God, you would not believe how much I’ve missed his witty remarks. When you get to know him he’s the sweetest,” Jimin chuckled, trailing his fingers over your arm absent-mindedly. You adored how much he loved his friends, and the way he spoke about them in such a light was captivating.

“Jimin-ah!”

“Jimin you absolute dumbass.”

“Jiminie, where are you?”

Your eyes flew open as a bombardment of voices attacked your ears suddenly. Jimin’s hands clenched into exhilarated fists against your skin as five other people bustled together in the circular shape hovering above the dusty book. You were astonished at how many different hair colours there were in the smallish group of people.

“Oh guys, I’ve missed you so much!” Jimin cried. His smile was so big his eyes were nothing more than tiny crescent shaped moons. You wondered if you had ever seen him this elated before.

“Hyung, how did you contact us?” A young looking boy asked breathlessly. Your eyes moved to spot Yoongi entering through the doorway to the library with another taller and blonder man in tow. They both seemed to be locked in a heavy discussion, and they made no move to join the group questioning Jimin.

“Who’s that?” A smiley boy with chestnut brown locks asked suddenly.

“That’s (Y/n), I’m guessing she helped Jimin regain power. Look at her, she’s clearly depleted,” Yoongi spoke from further back in the room. Now the serious discussion seemed to be over, and the other man also came forward to join the group. He had bleached buttery blonde hair that seemed really messed up from most likely his own hands. Now that you thought about it, both he and Yoongi seemed to be overly exhausted and irritated.

They were probably trying to find Jimin for so long.

“Hey, that’s not all she is to me,” Jimin complained with his tone gaining an angry twinge to it. You felt so appreciative and warmed that he had stuck up for you so quickly.

“Yeah, Jimin and I are more than just fuckbuddies,” You slurred while raising one hand to emphasise your point. The group of males on the other end burst into surprised laughter at your unforeseen addition.

“She’s…recovering,” Jimin pursed his lips, trying to stifle the amusement. “If it wasn’t for her then I wouldn’t have been able to do anything at all.”

Everyone nodded in understanding, but you felt slightly ashamed that they now basically thought of you as some ‘power supplier’. Well, you had joked about it and all, but you didn’t actually want to be known as something like that.

“Jimin-ah how much does she know?” The blonde man asked gravely. You scanned his face through the circle and found nothing but a stern and unyielding persona. The full gravity of the situation seemed to dawn on everyone at the same time.

“I won’t lie Jin-hyung, she knows more than she probably needs to. But you must understand that I have full trust in (Y/n), as she has done nothing but help me since day one,” Jimin explained. He was growing fretful after seeing everyone exchange knowing looks on the other end.

“You know what needs to be done.”

Jin’s words sunk in painfully. You didn’t understand fully but you still felt your heart snapping into two nonetheless. Jimin’s shoulders fell in a sudden drop of enthusiasm.

“I do know, but is there any possibility-”

“Jimin stop,” You groaned, shaking away the pounding headache to sit yourself upright and move away from the comforting body behind you. Jimin reached out to intertwine his fingers with yours against the bed sheets, just to keep some form of contact in case you passed out on him.

“I don’t know absolutely everything, but you guys probably know just how shit of a liar Jimin is,” You sighed.

“You got that right,” A summery redhead giggled along with the others as they wholeheartedly agreed with you. The edge of the situation was taken off slightly at the humour, but you knew you had to bring it back for the elders to be satisfied.

“I know,” You began solemnly, “That you’re probably going to have to get rid of me or something. Even if I swore to you I wouldn’t breathe a word, you don’t seem like the type to take that risk.”

You locked eyes with Jin as you spoke, trying to talk to him directly although it was difficult to pinpoint which one of him was the actual one.

“Hyung no,” Jimin protested loudly from beside you, obviously deeply upset at the very thought of you disappearing.

“Not get rid of you, but we have to get rid of something,” Yoongi butted in from the back, voice not betraying any emotion regarding the matter.

“And that is?” Jimin asked in synchronisation with some of the other group members. The air permeated with tension again as Yoongi fixed you with his inquisitive eyes.

“Her memories. Of everything she knows about our kind, and everything about you Jimin.”

Your world came crashing down as you registered the words over and over again. You felt like kicking yourself, because of course this was going to happen. You knew it would, but for some reason you had pushed the thoughts to the back of your mind because you had chosen to forget the things that would bring you pain. This was something predestined, and you both should have seen it coming from miles away.

“The reason you’re both lost for words is because you know it’s true, and you know it must be done,” Jin now raised his voice again, but this time you were surprised to hear pity and empathy mixed into the delivery.

“Jimin,” You whimpered, feeling your eyes cloud over with watery tears as you whipped your head to the side.

Then you broke down because his cheeks were already streaming with salty droplets.

The group watching through the circle fell silent as you threw yourself into Jimin’s arms, the desperation was clawing at you painfully as you clutched onto his shaking frame. His muffled sobs were hidden into your neck, but you still felt every noise as if it were a knife twisting inside your stomach.

I can never tell him that I love him, not now, not ever.

You squeezed your eyes shut and willed the tears away.

“I already know!”

You jerked your head backwards and looked into his tearful eyes in confusion. He cleared his throat meaningfully and somehow managed to stop diverting his gaze.

“I know you love me. Your mind has been screaming it since we got home and that’s the real reason why I cried after…”

Your breathing caught on the lump in your throat. He had known, and it hadn’t even been his choice to know. You wanted to scream until your throat was bloody and raw from the pure shame flushing at your cheeks and heart. There was no way you could run or pretend this wasn’t happening.

“I didn’t want to say anything because it’s already hard enough,” Jimin wailed quietly, lip trembling from the contained sobs threatening to break through his careful defences.

“Well, I have nothing left to hide,” You laughed dryly, feeling absolutely wrecked from the inside out. “It’s better this way. Then we don’t have to remember the pain of this moment,” You sighed and held his clenched hands within your own.

“You won’t, but I will,” He responded, hands unfurling and grasping at yours tightly.

“Why?” You sniffed in puzzled sadness, feeling another tear roll down your wet cheek. He smiled crookedly and wiped the tear away with one finger.

“Because I don’t ever want to forget you, (Y/n).”

Your face screwed up as another cry readied itself by your lips.

“Don’t do this to me Jimin, just let me forget easily,” You huffed in a high pitch, trying to chase away the torturous emotions before they actually broke you into tiny pieces.

“You’ll be fine, we’ll meet again someday,” Jimin smiled, a first for the whole conversation so far. You lifted your gaze from your joined hands to his face, incapable of not returning his infectious smile even though it pained you to see it in all its glory.

“Perhaps.”

Jimin looked at the floating circle. You were grateful that the whole group of men had decided to stay silent and mind their own business during your painful conversation. You were even shocked to see the smiley one from before shedding a few tears of his own as he dabbed at them gently with a tissue. Maybe they were just really saddened at the sight of the close friend breaking down in front of them.

“Jin-hyung, we’re ready,” Jimin rasped, as if the very sentence was like sticking pins into his own eyes.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be ready, but yeah,” You chuckled, feeling happy at the feeling of his fingers squeezing yours in reassurance.

“Let’s not be sad, let’s just promise that we’ll meet again even if we don’t fully remember each other,” Jimin proposed, holding out his pinky finger for you to follow suit.

“Talk about taking a shot in the dark, but okay Jimin, I’ll hold you to that.”

The promise was made with smiles on your faces. You didn’t know how it was possible, but you felt fulfilled despite the looming separation awaiting you.

“Okay, Yoongi has finished the ritual that will bring you home Jimin. You have already begun to materialise, say your last goodbyes now you two,” Jin instructed sadly. You thought you would feel the pressure, but oddly you felt a bittersweet sense of calm surrounding the two of you.

“(Y/n), my solace.”

You felt his plush lips brush against your own briefly before they moved to your forehead. You didn’t think you would ever forget their soft texture as they lingered on your skin. The final thing you saw before feeling your consciousness slip away was his warm eyes staring back at you.

“I love you too.”

#jimin x reader #jimin angst #jimin au #bts au #jimin smut #bts smut #jimin scenarios #bts scenarios #jimin fluff #salade-tb #solace

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transmanmonoma · 4 years

Note

Hey! What characters in bnha do you feel is overrated and underrated in the series/fandom?

While I like Bakugou more nowadays than I used to, I do still feel like he’s a bit overrated. He’s an interesting character for sure, but imo he’s not more interesting than some of the other main characters who get less screentime. I also think that in canon there’s too much focus on Midoriya being responsible for changing his behavior, so I don’t enjoy parts of the story he’s in where that’s a major theme

Endea\/or and O\/erhaul are both way overrated in my opinion, but I will admit that I’m biased because seeing either of those characters fills me with rage and I am incapable of caring if they’re interesting or not

As for underrated, in terms of canon that’s basically every girl in 1A, and honestly most of the girls and women in the series. Uraraka, despite being the first friend Midoriya made at UA, doesn’t get much of a chance to shine. Especially relative to other characters like Todoroki or Iida, both of whom befriended Midoriya after her. There’s also the fact that a lot of her canon appearances involve her romantic subplot(?) with Midoriya. I’ve talked a bit about it before, but it’s weird to me that even though they’re probably endgame based on context clues, he rarely shows any interest in her. She also gets weirdly jealous of Mei, despite the fact that A) she’s not dating him so it’s not really her business and B) Mei is more interested in Midoriya as someone who’s interested in her inventions than as anything romantic

Personally, I wish we got to focus more on Uraraka’s journey to being a hero, because it’s really cool. She’s a very caring person, going into heroics because her parents wanted her to follow her dreams, and wanting to repay them by making enough money to send them on a nice vacation. I also love that she got super into martial arts after interning with Gunhead. In the joint training arc we see that her motivation has shifted a bit, she wants to be someone who looks after her fellow heroes, which is a really interesting motivation that we don’t really see in the other characters, so I hope we see more of that as the story continues

I also definitely think Monoma is underrated. He tends to be the generic bad guy in fics where it’s necessary for there to be a bully/jerk/asshole at UA, which I think is unfair to him. Yes, he can be a jackass to 1A about the rivalry between their classes and his combat tactics involve a lot of shit talking (which is a valid strategy with his quirk), but he’s really not a bad guy. He’s dedicated to his friends, he’s smart and cunning, and he’s kind and welcoming to outcasts (see him and Shinsou in the joint training arc). I wish his character hadn’t been downgraded (Horikoshi intended to take him in a different direction at first, according to his notes)

I do think it would be cool to see more of 1B, but I get that the cast is already huge, and it would be difficult to flesh out even more characters. I would love to see the girls of 1A get more focus, especially in contexts that don’t involve boys they will probably have romantic subplots with (Jirou with Kaminari, Momo with Todoroki, etc). I just want to see them growing as both heroes and as people without the boys being the catalysts for their growth

Thanks for asking and giving me an excuse to ramble, have a nice day :)

#uraraka ochako #monoma neito #bnha #mha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #analysis

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until-theend-oftheline · 5 years

Text

Romantic Annoyance

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Squares Filled: Engagement for @marvelfluffbingo and “Come here and kiss me, Dummy” for @goodthingshappenbingo (mcu rpf)

Warnings: Traveling sucks. A jump scare.

Word Count: 2500ish

A/N: I was having Chris feels… And Scott stars a bit too cause why not!

Betaed by: @queen-of-the-avengers - Thank you Jordan!

***My fics are not to be saved nor posted on any other sites without my express written permission.***

Normally, you loved your job. More than that, it was part of who you were. You loved telling people’s stories. You loved fighting with your words and laptop against the injustice of the world. You were opinionated and fiery, and you still had yet to come across a rich white guy or a politician that scared you. You were a reporter and you were damn proud of it.

Today, as you sat on the crowded plane flying business class to Spain where you were supposed to cover a political conference and interview a guy who supposedly had some big secrets to tell. Your boss had been vague and truthfully when it came to the really big stories that were usually the way that she was, but today it annoyed you.

You had dropped everything and jumped the plane because she asked you too, just like always. But this time it wasn’t completely without regret. Actually, it was with a lot of regret, and as the toddlers behind you threw the third toy to the back of your neck, you sighed wishing you were back in the Boston airport.

You loved your job, but it kept you apart from your boyfriend, who also had a job that took him all over the world, far too much. Chris Evans was an actor and had spent the past eight weeks in South Africa shooting his newest movie. You had spent most of those eight weeks at home in Boston following up on a few different stories for the Globe. Sometimes, you were able to do the job you were proud of and stay fairly close to home.

As soon as the plane touched the ground, you sighed deeply. Of course, the eight weeks where Chris was on another continent, was the eight weeks you had barely had to leave Boston, and the day he was due to return home had been the day you had been ordered to a third continent yourself. Sometimes you were wondering how the two of you had made it this far.

You knew those thoughts were only you missing him. Chris was an amazing man, and he always made sure the two of you spent time together. Even when he had to travel with you across the world when he finally had time off to relax. You had gotten better at saying no, and valuing your free time with both your families.

You sighed once more as you got into the taxi, heading towards the hotel your boss had booked for you. Traffic was awful, and you soon realize you’d probably had to spend a good few hours in the cab, especially since the driver didn’t seem to have a clue where he was going.

You groaned to yourself after trying to point him in the right direction a few times, but soon gave up when he rambled about short cuts and backroads. Deciding it was pointless, you leaned back and looked out the window, taking in the city. At least it was your boss paying the bills, and you didn’t have to cash out for the long way round cab ride.

You closed your eyes, trying to relax. It had been a stressful morning, to say the least. Your boss had called you early this morning, making you rush into the office hardly without getting your morning coffee. You had tried to vessel out of the assignment, but she had guilted you into taking it anyway which meant rushing back home to pack while trying to arrange a dog sitter for Dodger.

Chris had left his dog in your care these past few weeks, and up until now it had been absolutely no problem, but you didn’t want to leave the pupper alone for you didn’t know how many hours until Chris made it back home tonight. Finally, you had managed to get a hold of Scott, who for some reason always seemed incapable of hurrying up. He was an absolute sweetheart, but he was one of the most laid back while still peppy people you had ever met. You weren’t sure how that combination was possible within one personality but it was in Scott, who always managed to make you laugh but also even later than you already were as he kept trying to sneak fancy clothes and bikinis into your suitcase.

“Scotty! I’m going there to do actual work. Not to work on my tan,” you whined as you tried to regain control of your packing, but no such luck.

“Who knows, you might meet some hot guy over there,” Scott shrugged, and jumped when your fist landed against his upper arm. “Hey!”

“I’ve been dating your brother for three years now you idiot. We practically live together. I’m not gonna meet any hot guys,” you scolded, making Scott bend over laughing. You shook your head deciding Scott had to have lost his mind.

Somehow you managed to make it to the airport just in time, kissing Scott’s cheek and telling him thank you for the ride before ruffling Dodger’s head and rushing towards the terminal. You didn’t see Scott smirking after you or how he quickly fished his phone out of his pocket as you ran to the desk to get your passport stamped and board your plane.

All you could think about as the cab finally pulled up in front of the hotel was that you hadn’t been able to reach Chris all day or even tell Scott when you’d be back home. You’re already shitty mood hadn’t improved when the manager at the front desk told you no rooms had been booked, and they didn’t have any rooms available. You had been on the verge of tears, which was not like you at all when he told you all the hotels in town were booked for the political convention, you were there to cover. Being this emotional over something as stupid as an overbooked city and a fault in your booking wasn’t normally something that would get to you. You were a practical person, and usually, you’d have gone into problem-solving mode and figure something out. Right then, however, it was all you could do to keep your tears at bay as you thought about Chris’ comfortable huge bed and his arms that could have been wrapped around you for the first time in weeks had you just stood your ground this morning and said no.

The manager at the hotel looked almost panicked when they realized yours were fighting back your tears. He quickly told you he had a friend that might be able to help. He rented outhouses by the beach, and there was a chance he had something available.

You thanked him profusely as he hung up the phone, scribbling down an address for you before handing it over. You had tried to pay him, but the man had refused, telling you his friend would drop by within a day or two to sort it all out with you. It was incredibly generous, and you knew you should be happy, but you weren’t. You just wanted to fly back home. You wanted to see your boyfriend and cuddling bed, and not on some stupid assignment in an overpacked big European city.

You drew a sigh of relief when the cab pulled up in front of the beach house. It was secluded and kinda perfect for when you had to write up your article or just go through whatever research you’d end up doing. You paid the cabby and thanked him before throwing your backpack over your shoulder and dragging your suitcase behind you. You never packed this heavy normally, but thanks to Scott you didn’t pack like a reporter going on assignment, but as a girl going to a sunny beach or honeymoon with her hot husband.

You groaned in annoyance as you managed to drag the bags up the stairs before dropping them inside the door. You closed your eyes, leaning against the hallway and letting out a deep breath as you wished you could just go to sleep rather than starting prepping for the convention you knew nothing about and were going to attend tomorrow.

Suddenly, your heart stopped in your chest as you noticed a flicker of light from the private beach across the hallway and dark living room. Maybe someone was still here and the guy had given you the wrong house number? Or maybe someone had just decided to squat in the empty vacation home?

You felt your stomach do a flip as panic started to settle in you. You looked around the dark house, but there was no indication anyone was here except for the flickering lights on the beach. You took a deep breath, slowly moving towards the patio doors.

You froze when you heard ruffling outside. Someone was definitely here. You weren’t sure what possessed you to bend over and take off one of your shoes, raising it over your head as a weapon as you slowly pushed the door open.

Before you had a chance to comprehend what was going on, a man jumped away from the door to prevent being hit by it. You screamed in surprise by the sudden movement and flung your shoe at his face before he could say anything. You turned around, ready to run for safety before stopping after only a few steps.

“Ow! Fuck!” the man grumbled, making you freeze and slowly turn back around.

“Chris! What the hell are you doing here?” you scolded, still not over your shook as you quickly approached him. You reached up and removed his hand from the side of his face where you assumed your shoe must have hit him. An angry red mark was forming, but thankfully, you hadn’t broken the skin.

“A shoe, Baby? Really? Suddenly, I’m worried about you traveling alone so much,” Chris joked, clearly not mad about you almost taking out his eye. Lucky for him, you always traveled in flats.

“Well strange men don’t usually show up at the places I rent,” you rolled your eyes before realizing how strange it really was that he was here.

“How did you even know? The travel was last second, and the hotel was fully booked. No one knows I am here, not even my boss…” you ranted, stopping when you saw the smirk on Chris’ face. Before he had the chance to say anything, you felt the anger build inside you. You weren’t sure if it was from being scared shitless not a moment ago or from the stressful day you had getting here.

“There is no job is there?” you hissed, ignoring the surprise on Chris’ face with how harsh your tone had grown. “I haven’t been able to reach you all day because you made my boss fake a job so I would get on a plane, battle the Spanish traffic to a hotel only to be told they were fully booked which I am sure wasn’t true either was it?”

You only stopped long enough for Chris to shake his head. You didn’t take in how mortified and apologetic he looked before you continued your rant. “And then I get here, and I think there is a burglar or squatter or something in the house, which is in the middle of nowhere I might add, and I have zero clue who to call to not get killed. Chris have you lost...”

You suddenly spotted the beach behind Chris, and you stopped with a gasp. The flicker of lights you had seen had been candles. Candles that spelled out the words “Marry Me?” Suddenly all the emotions from stress, to fear, to sorrow to anger to happiness, you had been feeling throughout the day, became too much as tears started flowing down your cheeks.

A look of absolute panic appeared on Chris’ face when he saw you start to cry. He quickly took a step towards you, fiddling with his hands, clearly not sure if it was okay for him to touch you with how angry you had just been with him a second ago.

“Y/N/N, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for the day to be this stressful for you. I didn’t think… I just wanted to surprise you. I’m so sorry,” Chris ranted before a single word from you made him stop.

“Yes,” you whispered, not really paying attention to Chris’ stream of words as you just looked at the beach behind him.

“What?”

You slowly turned to Chris’, laughing at the look of absolute confusion and disbelief on his face. “Yes. I’ll marry you. Come here and kiss me, dummy.”

“You…” Chris blinked and shook his head as if he was trying to comprehend what had just happened and then he started laughing himself. He stepped towards you, wrapping you in his arms and pressing a tender kiss to your lips, before pulling back to fish a small black velvet box out of his pocket.

“This is really not how I pictured this,” Chris mumbled, lowering himself down to one knee, causing you to laugh again.

“I already said I’ll marry you, you goof,” you teased and Chris’ pulled a face at you.

“Just let me do this woman,” he playfully growled, and you bit your lip, trying to hold back your laughter as happiness bubbled in your chest.

“I know being with me is not always easy. I’m spontaneous, and I, in some ways, stopped maturing past twelve,” Chris confessed, and you could no longer hold back your laughter as you ran your fingers through his long hair.

“Only in the best ways,” you interrupted him, biting your lip, not looking the least bit apologetic when he sent you a playful glare.

“You’re infuriating and stubborn. I’m annoying constantly wanting to surprise you. Our jobs make everything seem impossible at times, but this still works. I love you and I feel whole when I’m with you. You’re my missing piece Baby, and nothing would make me happier than if you’d be my wife?” Chris’ opened the box and showed you a simple silver diamond ring.

You felt yourself tear up again and the sight of him holding it, looking up at you with so much hope and love in those beautiful blue eyes of his. You nodded, sniffling and quickly drying your eyes with the back of your one hand and offering him the other.

“Yes. I’ll be your wife,” you smiled, and Chris quickly put the ring on your finger as if he was scared you’d regret your words if he didn’t seal them quickly.

You laughed as Chris jumped to his feet, wrapping you in his strong arms. He lifted you off the ground and spun you around laughing, as you squealed with equal amounts of surprise and happiness. He gently lowered you back to your feet, kissing you passionately. The world around you stopped turning. In that moment, all that mattered was Chris and his silent promise of an amazing life together.

Please reblog; help me spread my work - Leave a comment. Feedback is fuel

Chris Evans Tag Team

@feelmyroarrrr @princess-evans-addict @roxyspearing @jewels2876 @girl-next-door-writes @hellaqueerangelofthelord @danijimenezv @becs-bunker @smoothdogsgirl @blacktithe7 @grace-for-sale @averyrogers83 @sorenmarie87 @docharleythegeekqueen @erosbellarke @the-wayward-robot @super100012 @myfanficlibrarium @awkwardfangirl2014 @dottirose @panicatttckiss @kimmiestrawberrykiwi

#Chris Evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans imagine #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x you #chris x reader #chris x you #mcu rpf

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capricornus-rex · 4 years

Text

Playing Pretend (5)

Requested by @calkesttiss | Prompt:

Hi! I just watched isi & ossi (rich girl and poor boxer boy AH) on netflix and now i cant stop thinking about cal and fake dating. Do with that what you will 😂

Cal Kestis x Reader

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | Next: Part 6 | Masterlist

5 of ?

You couldn’t stay still while sipping on champagne. At the corner of Tazha’s eye, she takes notice of a boy who seem to perfectly fit the description of the boy you first met days ago. She tapped you repeatedly on the shoulder.

“Look over there, [y/n],”

You turn your attention to the direction where Tazha’s eyes are. You froze and your eyes widened in sheer surprise, you almost fell from losing balance on your heels, and the word that you wanted to utter became just a choked grunt.

“Oh my God…” was all you managed to say.

You strode down the stairs, tailed by Tazha, you pushed and excused yourself from the large adults that stood in your way until you could get to Cal.

“Cal?”

When he turned to look at you, he was just as surprised as you are. He wasn’t wearing a fancy suit or outfit, his jumpsuit was black—contrast to the blue one that you remembered him wearing when you met him.

“[y/n]? What are you doing here?”

“I was about to ask you the same thing,”

Cal explained that he and his companions were proxies for some of the guests that didn’t make it. He also said that one of his companions personally knew Senator Bail Organa.

“Who invited you?” the clueless redhead asked.

“Who invited her?” Tazha repeated mockingly, warranting attention from both Cal and you. “Her dad is responsible for this shindig. She lives here!”

At that moment, you felt like the floor would crumble under your feet anytime. You were pushed into a corner, no thanks to Tazha’s unsolicited reply. Your quick wit couldn’t even save you from that revelation.

“Is that true?”

“Yep. Sorry, I didn’t exactly specify where in Alderaan I lived,”

Suddenly, the lightbulb in your mind flickered on.

“Look, I’m sorry in advance but this is probably gonna be the weirdest thing but… Could you be like my boyfriend for a few minutes, please?”

“What?”

A lump got stuck in your throat that you can’t seem to swallow away, your palms were sweating, and your own heels are trembling at the mercy of your stilettos—all happening at the same time.

Oh, suck it up, [y/n]!

“Tomorrow at the Tipsy Taun-Taun. Meet me there at 0300,”

Logan appeared in the corner of your eye, you saw him looking for you in your general direction. You inhaled sharply, stepped closer to Cal, clutching him by the arm, and then kissed him on the cheek—close enough to give off the intimate façade. Even Tazha was surprised with this bold move of yours; she also noticed Logan standing a few meters away but is in full view of you and Cal together in the dance floor.

When you pulled away, he was simply taken aback, at a loss for words. It took him a few good minutes before his mind registers what just went down. He didn’t have the chance to object—as a matter of fact, he never had the time.

“Please at least tell me what you’re planning on doing, [y/n]?”

“What does it look like I’m doing, Tazha? I’m sabotaging my own arranged engagement,”

The next morning, you felt a hangover coming on even though you didn’t have much to drink, though it was more of an emotional one. When you woke, the words that you’ve let go were still fresh in your mind—as if you’ve only said them moments ago—you also thought the whole scene last night was kind of funny, you fight your incoming laughter by chewing on your cheek.

You contemplate whether to go or not.

“What have I go to lose anyway?”

You bring yourself out of bed, get dressed and ultimately miss breakfast with your parents and had a bowl of cereal as brunch instead. You ponder about your parents’ next possible move—predicting that they’re finally working on the campaign, another heated argument either over dinner again or in the living room is likely to happen. Though you didn’t let that linger in your head that much so you sneak out of the house to meet Cal.

Along the way, you were worried that this plan was silly and pointless. Should it come through, it will be short-lived. Out of all the things you’ve planned in your entire life, this is possibly the most badly-thought, the most desperate, and perhaps your only fighting chance.

When you got to the pub, the barkeeper greeted you only with his eyes, then gestured you to the farthest side of the pub—at the booth of the left side of the building, the ends of his hair were poking out of the couch’s tall backrest.

“You made it,” you say as you approached the booth and took a seat.

“Well, that was the only clear thing you ever said to me last night,”

“Right, about that, I guess I owe you an… elaborate explanation,”

“Obviously,”

“I’m engaged,”

An awkwardness lingered between the two of you, it hung around the air like the small cheap chandelier suspended above your heads. Cal’s eyes shifted from left to right, he twiddled his thumbs together while deciding the most appropriate thing to say to that.

“Uh… congratulations?”

“No!” you groaned in great vexation. “I didn’t want that engagement in the first place.”

“You don’t wanna get married?”

“Not to that imbecile they’ve paired me with,” your face cringed at the thought of Logan as a husband which he clearly is incapable of being. “So, no, I am not putting a ring on that.”

Cal’s silence as a reaction to that implied you to lay on your plans involving him and why you uttered those words to him last night at the party.

“Be my boyfriend until it convinces my parents well enough to cancel the engagement,”

“What’s in it for me?”

“Well, what do you want?”

Cal shifted in his seat, he leaned back some more into the couch, and knew that this was an opportunity to help Greez with his loan problem. What’s holding him back is his moral compass.

“A friend of mine has a problem. He’s taken a loan and the shark is after him, we only got into this planet via an alias. It’s a loan for the ship we’re using to go around places,”

“So you want me to cover what’s left of the payment?”

“Smart girl,”

“No, it’s just plain logic, dude. But sure, I’ll help. How much do you guys need anyway?”

“We’re short on 40,000 credits,”

The amount didn’t faze you, although you wondered what kind of ship they have to garner such a price in the loan. It didn’t take long for you to think hard about it, you simply agreed to help Cal with his friend’s ship loan problem.

“Okay, that seems doable, but only if you play along with what I want.”

“And what’s that?”

You shrug one shoulder and eyeball your right side. “Be my boyfriend. Or pretend to be—until my parents blow of the engagement because they’ll think I’m too in love with you.”

Cal smacked his lips, “Okay then, that’s… possible.”

Both of you were awkward about this but were willing to make ends meet. One needed something from the other. A simple cycle, a classic pattern.

“Maybe one of these days, you’ll show me to the ship, if that’s okay.” You said demurely.

Cal shrugged his shoulders, “Sure, no problem. Who knows? You might like it.”

“Do we have a deal?” you extend your hand across the table to him.

He shakes on it.

“Alright, we got a deal then.”

Your handshake slowed down but neither of you seem to be letting go of each other’s hand. You had to take the initiative. Cal cleared his throat.

“Okay, so how does this work?”

“What does work?”

“The whole fake dating thing,”

“Pretty much like what you’d do in a real relationship, Cal. The hugging, kissing, cuddling, hand-holding—typical stuff.”

You chuckled, thinking that it was silly enumerating things couples normally do as if it was rocket science. But then again, you’ve never been into a relationship before. For what it’s worth, this could be your first actual relationship—despite it being a charade deal hybrid.

You were the first to break the ice, you didn’t even realize that you freely spoke about anything you wanted to him. He lent his listening ear and sometimes continue the flow of the conversation. Starting off with basics such as homeworlds, hobbies, and what you did growing up, it eventually shifted to the interests you’ve developed as you grew up. That’s when you’ve become more animated and vocal with your stories.

Cal was observing you across the table that you didn’t even notice it. He watched you ramble on, maintaining eye contact with him as you talked, and making slight gestures with your hands as you continued telling stories. Unconsciously, the corner of his mouth curled as he listened to you speak.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry, I’m rambling! I just got carried away with the stories and stuff,”

“No. It’s not a problem, I mean… that’s the first step, right? Getting to know each other,”

You shyly smiled, “Yeah, I suppose you’re right.”

Coy smiles exchanged with one another over the table. Thinking of other things to talk about, Cal decided it would be a good idea to show you the Mantis—the exact thing that you’re fulfilling your end of the bargain for.

“Come on, [y/n], my turn to show you something,”

“Really?”

“Come on,”

He stood up, you didn’t expect him to extend his hand to you but you took it anyway. The two of you left the pub and followed him to the place where the Mantis was docked.

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