#and my grandmas were fighting with each other and then the neighbours came and they couldnt get it open

[totallyuseless-ugh]

You rocked my Heart

Chapter Eight: Intoxicated Words are Sober Thoughts

Never before had CJ been so glad to see their grandma Helena. Having her present made the holidays much more pleasant, despite having to sit at one table with Cristoff again every day. At least he no longer insisted on having his children greet him at the breakfast table. He seemed to understand that if he were to try this, CJ would be just as reluctant to talk to him, but this time Helena would be there to witness it. Her presence reassured CJ more and more that it would not be as big of a deal if they were to leave the house for a few hours.

The anticipated day kept coming closer, and the wait was made much more bearable with the calls CJ and Darnell had every day. It didn't matter how brief their conversations were. Just getting to hear the other for a while as they both waited to see each other again felt like a second, much shorter advent calendar. And before they knew it had the day finally come.

During dinner kept CJ's eyes darting back and forth between the clock on the wall and their plate. Nobody seemed to notice their odd behaviour, most likely because the family was deep into conversation. If CJ weren't currently elsewhere with their thoughts, the whole atmosphere at the table would've made them sick to their stomach. Cristoff was smiling and talking as if this family hadn't suffered under his terrors one bit, as if the fight had never broken out in front of his wife and younger sons. He was witty when it came to lying and pretending he lived the perfect life. It was sickening to watch.

Lucky for CJ though, dinner was over fairly quick. Joane and Helena brought away the dirty dishes while Aaron and Henry would wipe down the table and put the chairs back into place. Meanwhile Cristoff went ahead to get comfy on the couch as he smoked a cigarette. CJ didn't hesitate to take this chance and quickly leave for their room upstairs. They still had to wait a bit until it would be time to head out, but CJ preferred to spend that time by themself and find something to wear that would keep them warm and comfy on their way to Rika's house.

The streets outside their window were already dark and barely lit by a few lanterns or porch lights of the neighbouring houses. Snow had been plowed away earlier that day to make it easier to walk and drive around, though most people avoided going outside as much as possible in these freezing temperatures. CJ eventually got ready to leave the house. The only thing missing was a lighter. But as they were searching for one laying around in their room knocked Helena on the open door, smiling at them a little. "Sneaking out for the night?"

Instead of feeling caught or scared rolled CJ their eyes with a small grin. "Yeah, being stuck in this house all day sucks." They soon found what they had been looking for and swiftly dropped the item into their pocket before finally facing their grandma properly. Helena chuckled softly, reaching out to lightly ruffle the dark blonde hair of her grandchild. "Don't overdo it then. I doubt your mom would be very happy otherwise," Helena told them.

"I won't, definitely. Just.. having a very overdue evening with my friends." CJ had only taken a few steps out into the hallway before they stopped again to talk to Helena. "Oh, uhm.. quick question, you don't need the other bed in the guest room, right?"

"You plan on bringing over some company?”

"Yeah, just to make sure he stays safe 'n all. It's his first time," CJ explained to her. "He'll be gone before breakfast though. Darnell ain't much of a fan when it comes to you-know-who."

"Oh really? I thought your friends enjoyed his company," Helena spoke as sarcastically as ever before she waved CJ off. "No worries, I'll have the bed clear for him by the time you two get back. Now go have some fun before you actually get caught."

CJ grinned and dramatically blew her a kiss, then hurried on downstairs. Joane was still in the kitchen, putting away the last few things while Henry and Aaron watched tv with Cristoff. It made CJ's heart sink a little to not only see both their siblings sit on the other couch, as far away from their father as possible. But Aaron sat on the side closer to Cristoff, looking over at him every time he moved just a little or made any bit of noise. If they hadn't been so sure that Helena's presence in the house would keep Cristoff at bay, CJ would've decided to stay home that very moment. Never would they want for Aaron to feel the need to stand between Henry and their father as CJ had done for them.

They shook their head a little in an attempt to clear their mind before they quietly put on their boots, coat, and scarf to then sneak out through the front door. An icy breeze hit them almost right away. If they weren't in such need for a break, the weather definitely would've made them rethink their decision of meeting up with their friends. And although the walk down to Rika's house was quite long, upon their arrival, CJ was more than glad to have made it there.

"Jay! Took ya long enough!" Rika greeted them with a laugh. She patted their shoulder as CJ came into the warm house to take off the now snow covered clothes. "It's not exactly the season to ride a bike, Rix," CJ informed their friend. "And I hate to disappoint you, but I don't have a few huskies and a sledge just laying around."

Rika laughed and eventually let go of CJ that they could hang the coat to dry. "Everyone is here already. Just been waiting for you before we'd get started."

"Oh how sweet of you," CJ swooned sarcastically. "You waited to get high with me. You're just so amazing, because you definitely know how to roll joints yourselves and don't need any help at all." They walked down the hallway with Rika to make their way into the basement where the group of friends would always meet to hang out together outside of school. Egeith had just put extra wood into the small fireplace before settling back on the couch while Sunghee, Charlie, and Darnell were talking to each other. The conversation was promptly put on hold as Rika returned with the final missing guest.

“CJ!” Charlie cheered at the sight of her friend, and the rest of the group was quick to join in. Darnell was smiling wide at them. Although he had been enjoying himself just fine so far, it was a relief to finally have CJ there as well. Egeith made sure to give his friend a quick hug and a pat on the back as a greeting before CJ had the chance to plop down into one of the beanbags near the couches. “Took a bit longer than I had expected,” they explained while taking out the items from their pockets which they had brought with them. Rika settled on the couch next to Sunghee just as Charlie got up to walk over to the stairs. “Now that everyone’s here, I'm-a go pop the pizzas in.” The group all gave her a thumbs up as she left.

They all took time to unwind and chill out for a while, just chatting in peace before CJ eventually moved to settle down by the small table. “Got the tobacco here, Rix?” CJ asked as they took the small bag of weed in their hands, idly playing around with it. Rika hummed as confirmation and nudged a small can towards them.

“Wait, why tobacco?” Darnell asked curiously. “Wouldn't you get high quicker with just weed?”

“Exactly,” CJ responded as they began twirling a piece of rolling paper between their fingers. “And that’s the problem. Not for us, but for you. Since you got no experience with this, it’s safer for you not to take in too much in one puff. We don't want you hallucinating or some shit on your first trip already.”

Darnell’s eyes grew wide over what he was told. He understood well enough CJ’s reasoning and wasn’t going to argue against it. What did surprise them was that it was possible to possibly get hallucinations from weed. “Oh- yeah, that makes sense of course.”

CJ nodded slightly, most of their focus currently being on properly rolling a few proper joints for the group to share amongst them. And just as CJ laid the last one on the table returned Charlie just in time with a plate in her hands. “Guys, I need someone to help me get all the food down here,” she told her friends. Sunghee didn’t hesitate to get off her comfy seat and help out.

The group lounged together near the coffee table, eating and talking while passing a lit joint around in the circle. It didn’t take long for the laughter among the friends to grow loud and drawn out, conversations being a mess of slurred words, suddenly broken up sentences, and idiotic ideas thrown around without a care and nobody to remember them. Darnell was the prime example for that. He had no idea how much would be enough for him, and the burning in his throat from his first attempt of taking a puff made it only harder to focus on how much he inhaled. Along with his low tolerance, it didn’t take long until he began to babble nonstop. And the things he told were entertaining to say the least, getting the group to laugh even more than they already did.

Everyone was enjoying themselves, including CJ. Since the rest had mostly paid attention to their new guest, nobody had noticed how little CJ had smoked themself. They were buzzed and resting limply in the beanbag as always. But they still were able to keep an eye out for Darnell and make sure he wouldn’t go over the top.

*

Time ticked by in a rapid pace. Only when Egeith randomly commented that over three hours had passed realized the group it was already incredibly late. But it bothered none except CJ, as the rest had agreed to have a sleepover in the basement. It took CJ a moment to stand up on their feet before they could help Darnell to leave the basement with them. The remaining group waved and loudly said their goodbyes as the two left to dress up for the freezing temperatures awaiting them on their walk home. Darnell couldn’t stop laughing, having to sit down on the floor as to not fall over while getting his shoes on.

“You’re really having a blast, huh?” CJ laughed at the sight. They were glad to be not full on high like the others, or they would have been acting just as silly. Who knows what sort of stupid things could’ve slipped from them in such a state, especially around Darnell. He nodded with a silly, wide grin across his face and shakily got back up to shrug his coat over his shoulders. “Best day ’f my life!” He barked.

Along with CJ’s help made the two their way outside. They stepped through the new layer of snow that was covering the streets again. Good thing CJ was clear enough in their head to know the way back home. Darnell was stumbling from left to right and back, so he needed to hold onto CJ for the walk to the Ashton house. “Maaan, you’re just so cool,” he continued to babble without a thought. “Your friends, th’ stuff y’all do. I only wish I could be on that level!”

“Oh c’mon,” CJ began to laugh softly. “We’re not that special. Besides, you can just hang with us. Become a part of the group if you want.”

Darnell gasped excitedly. “I’d like that, oh you’ve no idea!” He bumped into CJ’s side during their walk, neither of them really caring as long as he would manage to stay on his feet. “I like hanging out with Rika, ‘n Egeith, Sunghee, Charlie.. And with you too of course!” Darnell pointed right at CJ with a giggle.

“I’m glad to hear that,” they smiled back. As silly as Darnell’s outbursts were, CJ still enjoyed listening to his mindless babbles. Even when he began repeating “I like you” in different tones until all words nearly lost their meaning. “You really seem to like me a bunch,” CJ laughed, trying to play off how flustered they felt over their own little comment.

“Y’wanna know how much exactly?” Darnell grinned and giggled as he waited for the other to give some sort of response. CJ nodded out of curiosity, at which Darnell began to giggle only more. “I like you sooo much, I would full on kiss ya if I got the chance!”

CJ felt a cold shock shooting up their spine. He didn’t seriously just say this, right? Darnell was high, no way he actually meant the things he said. “Heh, I had no idea you’re into guys..” they muttered. Although CJ was pretty sure they couldn’t take anything serious that Darnell would tell them, the curiosity in them was far too great not to play along and ask questions.

“Well, duh! It’s a secret after all,” Darnell told them in a deadpan manner.

“Fair enough, I suppose,” CJ said mostly to themself. They completely looked away from the other. “Why do you like me though? What is there to like about the way I am?”

Darnell rolled his eyes and scoffed as if he had just been asked the easiest question in all of humanity. “Everythin’bout you! Our calls ‘n talks every day, th’ book you gave me. Oh! Especially the lil’ note you put in there. Makes me wanna kiss ya even more!” His voice was giggly the whole time. It confused CJ, unable to tell whether Darnell was trying to pull a prank on them, or if his words were genuine and the intoxicated state had him giggling to cover up his nervousness.

Eventually, CJ stopped walking. Their head felt as if it were overloaded with questions and anxieties. “So.. you’re not joking?..” CJ was hesitant to ask.

“Why would I joke about wantin’ to kiss you?” Darnell answered immediately. He gazed at the other despite it being unrequited, his eyes full of genuine adoration. The dim porch lights near the two made it hard to see how red CJ’s face had gotten from both the icy winds and the flustered feeling boiling up inside of them. It took Darnell a bit to understand what the lasting silence meant. Why CJ only after a while dared to glance back at him almost fearfully.

He slowly removed his arms from CJ’s. They were already on the verge of simply walking home without another word and pretending this never happened. They didn't notice how Darnell had come to rest his hands on their shoulders before moving further up and hold CJ’s face in them. Only when both finally locked eyes again lit their expression up faintly. Darnell looked up at them without a hint of anger or disgust like they had dreaded.

Before CJ knew it were they pulled down closer to Darnell as he guided their lips to meet for a soft kiss. After months of yearning for each other, this moment was overwhelming for both. They pulled back just a mere second later already to stare at one another. CJ was beyond shocked and wondered for just a moment whether they actually did smoke a bit too much and were imagining things. But as Darnell laid his warm hand on their cold cheek was CJ sure that this had to be real.

"We.. gotta keep going," they muttered hesitantly. Their hand cupped over the other's to keep it safe from the icy cold surrounding them both. Reluctantly, the two separated to walk alongside each other for the rest of their way. But for the time that they had not yet reached the Ashton home, the two kept their pinkies linked between them.

Inside the house were all lights out already. Everything was silent as the two snuck in and tried to remove their extra clothes as quietly as possible. At every noise they made cursed CJ under their breath, hoping that nobody would wake up to catch them. Luckily, no one came to see the two sneak around until they had retreated safely to the bedroom upstairs.

Darnell plopped down on the bed tiredly, groaning as he already started to feel the effects of his first stoner party wearing off. CJ sat next to him and the two smiled as they gazed at each other. “Finally getting a clear mind again?” they asked with a soft chuckle.

Darnell gave a slow nod as response before he carefully sat up again. “This was.. quite something to be honest. Can’t believe you do this regularly,” he joked a little. “But I got no regrets.”

“You get used to it,” CJ told Darnell in a soft chuckle. Their gaze lingered for a little longer before leaning closer for another kiss. Now that the two were sobering up had the buzzing feeling become less overwhelming, but the intensity of the moment was still the same as before.

Darnell pulled back his head a little to look at CJ again. His eyes were filled with something close to fascination, as if he were still unable to believe this was actually happening. "If getting high always leads to something this amazing, I don't wanna get used to it though," he mumbled under his breath.

CJ was speechless for a moment. It was clear that his words were genuine as they had been the entire night already.

"You never stop surprising me with your words, Nells."

"Really?" Darnell began to laugh softly at the sight of CJ's lovestruck grin. "How? Tell me what keeps on surprising you."

"Just listen to yourself! You managed to make smoking weed poetic and meaningful! I didn't even know this was possible!"

The two bursted out into quiet laughter together. It lasted for a few minutes, as every time they calmed down and looked at each other, the laughter bubbled up and from their mouths all over again. Only when the exhaustion was starting to make CJ yawn a little managed both to control their amusement again.

"Got some clothes I could borrow for the night?" Darnell asked and rubbed his eyes. CJ nodded with a hum as they moved off the bed to pick out some comfy clothes to sleep in for them both. They got changed before nestling into bed under the heavy duvet. Neither had to say a word or give an asking look towards the other, Darnell just quietly rested his head on CJ’s chest, and CJ put their arm around his body as if they had been expecting for him to lay against them this way.

It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep once the light got switched off. His slow breathing comforted CJ as they stayed awake for the night. As far as they knew, and hoped, only Helena knew about the adventure and the secret sleepover guest her oldest grandchild had snuck out for. But with Cristoff back in the house felt anything they did like a major risk. The fear of him snapping once Helena would leave again was already terrifying enough. No way would they want to test his nerves over finding out about any of this, even while their grandmother was still present.

With Darnell having become yet another secret to keep, CJ had to be extra careful. Even if they’d try to sleep, their anxiety wasn’t letting them have more than a few minutes of dozing off before they would suddenly open their eyes again to stare at the door. It was beyond exhausting for them to stay up the entire night just in case. But knowing Darnell was safe, and more importantly theirs now too, made all the struggles CJ had faced over the past year absolutely worth it.

#CJ #Darnell #you rocked my heart #Chapter eight #Rika #Egeith #Sunghee #Charlie/Sydney #sydney #finally this story has come to an end

[cloudystevie]

that was probably the shittiest thing ive ever had to go through and i was supposed to be super productive today and now i just feel sick to my stomach

#jasmeen says shit #my dads gonna be pissed off cuz my grandpa literally broke the new flooring we got YESTERDAY literally not even 24hours lld and its broken #and he kept fucking shoving it after i told him to stop and my dad was telling him #and my grandmas were fighting with each other and then the neighbours came and they couldnt get it open #and i was like texting my mom the whole time and panicking and my dad kept calling me #and then my uncle came and he broke my bed too so 🙏 love it here #but at least im out of my room and i ate and peed so thats good #now idk what to do

[denkamis]

hc’s about falling in love with your childhood best friend.

masterlist.

warnings: swearing ig?? it’s fluffy, mainly. i tried to make it fairly gender neutral in terms of the reader. 

notes: hi uh these were supposed to be for the dekusquad but they ended up being SO much longer than i originally intended so i cut down on the characters ;-; i struggled with bakugou’s but his ended up being the longest??? idk man, hope you guys like it <3 these are seriously just drabbles in disguise

izuku midoriya

you met at an author meetup at the local bookstore. the book was a biography about all might, ofc you were bound to meet

you were in front of him in line and he shyly complimented you on the all might t-shirt you had worn

you two basically spent the entire time talking to each other about your favourite pro heroes as you waited in line

by the time you got to the front, you were so engrossed in your own conversations that both inko and your mom figured it would just be better to take you two home for a playdate instead 

since you were friends with midoriya, that meant bakugou was also in your little circle 

you stood up to him a couple times and always checked up on midoriya after kacchan’s tiny tantrums 

midoriya appreciated that, and you two were practically inseparable 

bakugou always accused you two of teaming up against him 

you would simply link arms with midoriya, tilt your chin up high and say that you were a full package deal. two peas in a pod. two halves of a whole, always 

midoriya’s face seemed to be permanently red that entire day 

you two were pretty dedicated in school, with you wanting to persue your top picks for high school. that meant that there were lots of study dates between you two 

during those study dates, midoriya couldn’t help if his gaze lingered on you just a bit more than his notes about quirk laws 

he realized he was in love with you when you had stayed after school to look for the notebook kacchan had burnt 

“you don’t have to do this, y/n. i can find it on my own… i don’t want to make to make you stay any longer.” 

“don’t say that, izuku. i don’t mind. besides, we always stick together and we will even after you get into ua!” 

“a- after i get in?” he spoke in a disbelief. everyone had doubted him, everyone had told him that he needed a quirk in order to get in but not you

you stayed. you supported him. you believed in him. 

he grabbed your hand on instinct, startling you. “i- i-” he began stuttering, eyes darting about as the feelings he hadn’t realized resurfaced

“thank you.” 

you gave him a gentle smile, chest feeling light as your hand encased in midoriya’s squeezed his own comfortingly 

“full package deal, remember?” 

he nodded, his smile jittery and shy. you giggled, blush dancing on your cheeks as you went on your next rant about how kamui woods could totally beat mount lady in a fight 

midoriya gripped the straps of his backpack, chest feeling light and his head feeling dizzy with all the new thoughts of you flooding his mind

oh yeah, he was definitely in love with you

shouto todoroki

you were his neighbour 

well, more accurately, your grandparents were his neighbours and you visited often 

your grandparents made you get the mail in the mornings and sometimes you would see him outside in the front yard with his mother. you would wave to him, and he would give a timid wave back after some encouragement from his mother 

you would play outside with your grandfather, flying your tiny kite and playing catch with him 

until you noticed there was a boy lingering near the fence separating the both of your houses 

he was watching the relationship you had with your grandfather curiously, almost as if there were a bit of envy in his eyes 

being the kind child that you were, you went over to him and passed the small ball between the rungs of the fence to him 

shouto was hesitant, but eventually took the ball from your inviting grip and tossed it back and forth between his hands testingly

this began a little game between you two 

he would toss the ball over the fence, and you would throw it back over to him

you didn’t quite understand why he couldn’t come on the other side of the fence to visit properly, but that was okay

you two would spend hours by the fence, sitting and talking you would give him tiny daisy chains made from the flowers in your grandma’s garden 

he wouldn’t tell you, but he kept each one you gave him on his windowsill 

he would compliment you a lot, too

not that he knew what that meant, he was simply stating facts to you 

“i like your hair. it’s very pretty.” 

“you’re very strong. you throw over the ball like it’s nothing.” 

“you want to become a hero? i think you would be the best one.” 

“your smile makes me want to smile, too.”

all of his words make your heart do somersaults

sometimes when you’re sitting with your backs to the fence, leaning up against each other, you feel the heat of his left hand ghosting your fingers. you don’t know why that made you feel shy, but it did

one day before you were supposed to go back home to your parents’ house, you went to go say goodbye to shouto 

he was sitting there normally, but his head was hung low so you couldn’t quite see his face 

as you approached him, you noticed that there was a bandage covering his left eye 

“sho?” 

he said nothing as you sat down 

“mom says i have to go now,” you tell him. he says nothing, again 

“um… are you okay?” 

an indiscernible noise comes from the small boy. you press your face right up against the one barrier separating you two. he looks up to see you worried. you didn’t like seeing him so upset

then an idea came to you

“before i go.. let me kiss it better.” 

shouto looked at you in bewilderment

“you’re not… afraid?” 

“no, why?” you asked in a confused manner, yet shouto remained hesitant 

“come here, please,” you asked of him, “before mom catches me kissing a boy.” 

pink dusting over his cheeks, he slowly crawled his way over to where you still kept your face against the fence. your gentle lips met the fabric of his bandage. the scent of something burnt catching in your nose as you did 

“you’ll come back?” shouto asked quietly. you nodded, promising him 

he nodded back in understanding, the tiniest of smiles appearing across his features 

“i’ll be waiting.”

katsuki bakugou

you had been in the same class since kindergarten, meaning that you knew him before he had his quirk 

even so, you thought he was pretty cool 

the reason for that? well, you weren’t exactly the most well liked kid in school. children were ruthless, and there was always a bottom of every social ladder between preschoolers

you got teased a lot. they pulled your hair, made fun of the way you cried, poked fun at the shoes and shirts you wore despite them being your favourite ones 

you were different. they didn’t like that 

the world seemed completely against you

during a colouring activity, the box of crayons you were holding was smacked out of your hands. your bottom lip quivered as the same boy taunted you to no end about how clumsy you were 

you simply bent over to pick them up before hearing another voice call out 

“oi, picking on small fries like that is lame.” 

looking to your left stood katsuki bakugou, looking bored and disinterested in helping you out. but your bully stopped in his tracks. being called lame?? by the great tiny katsuki bakugou?? 

no one had ever stood up for you like that 

even though he didn’t help you pick up your crayons, it felt like you had some type of ally in this class

slowly, you connected two and two together 

if you stayed around bakugou, no one could pick on you anymore! so you glued yourself to him practically every day 

at first, he found it annoying, but after seeing that you admired him up close, he liked the attention that feuled his ego, so he kept you around 

because you followed him around so much, you picked up a lot of things from him. he taught you how to defend yourself, and you taught him that some extras didn’t deserve as much attention as he was giving him. it was better to walk away sometimes

you ate lunch together, he came over to your house to play heroes and villains, he even showed you his secret all might poster collection. you were his person to talk to

he even had a katsuki bakugou™ nickname for you: small fry 

you two were quite the duo. bakugou went from simply tolerating you, to gradually beginning to care for you being around

and as you grew up with him, he caught himself beginning to admire the strong, gorgeous person you had become all on your own. it seemed he had developed a bit more than just a simple friendship bond with you

did he ever tell you that? fuck no 

you knew bakugou had always been rather… brash 

but you absolutely drew the line in the sand when he wouldn’t stop picking on midoriya for being quirkless. that one day where you walked into that classroom to meet bakugou and his group of friends only to see bakugou telling some green haired kid to jump off the building because he would never make it into ua without a quirk. he was different

bakugou turned to leave and he saw you standing in the doorway with a bit of an angry, hurt expression on his face

“small fry, thought you were never gonna show up.” 

“... lame.”

“hah? what did you say?” 

“i said it’s lame picking on small fries like that just because they’re different,” you spat at him. his eyes stayed fixated on you as you walked past him, helping the smaller boy off the floor and asking if he was okay 

normally, if it were anyone else, bakugou wouldn’t care. at all

but it was you

 you were different 

and all he did was act like he didn’t care. why? he didn’t know. but what he said to you that day came out rash and hurtful. you two had your fights before, but this had struck a chord with you. no one deserved to be treated like how you were back in preschool. that hurt

he didn’t realize how much you meant to him until you stopped inviting him over, you stopped eating lunch with him, you stopped texting and that bothered him 

the one person who he wanted to admire him didn’t anymore 

so it was a surprise to you that he waited for you to be finished your club after school to talk 

“small fry, listen. oi! i said listen up!” you kept walking, but he stopped you by grabbing your wrist 

“what? what is it? what can you possibly say to make things better? how could you treat people like that?” 

“come back.” 

“what?” 

“i said, fuck- come back, y’know, eat lunch with all the extras again.” 

“no.” 

the frustration showed true on bakugou’s features. his cheeks were turning red, you figured from the anger he was feeling towards you yet his voice dropped 

“i didn’t mean that shit back there. i was angry. fuck, i.. you want me to apologize or some shit, right. heard you small fries like that.” he shifted uncomfortably, his clammy hand still holding your wrist in a firm grip, as if you would walk away from him any moment now 

“sorry, or whatever.” he mumbled out in the smallest voice you had ever heard bakugou speak in 

your heart stopped as he looked at you with such sincerity. you held his gaze, eyes locked on his before you shook your head

“i don’t forgive you for saying what you said and doing what you did, but i do trust you. and i know that you’re better than that. you’re not lame. but if you seriously do that again, i’m not giving you any more chances.” 

relief came flooding back to bakugou at your words, but his face fired up almost instantly as you moved your hand so that your fingers intertwined with his 

“now c’mon, the new all might special is airing tonight, if we hurry we can still make it to my house.” 

“don’t speak so fucking loud! ... damn small fry.”

all works © denkamis 2021.

tags:

@meilbox

want to be on the taglist? see this post!

#mha headcanons #bnha headcanons #shouto todoroki x reader #izuku midoriya x reader #katsuki bakugou x reader #mha x reader #bnha x reader #midoriya x reader #todoroki x reader #bakugou x reader #denkamis.hcs

[arrogantsonofabiscuit]

MIYA TWINS AS KIDS

Feat:- Miya twins

Genre:- fluff, crack .

A/n:- in my neighbourhood we have twins and they are chaotic af and I thought let’s think about them as Miya twins hehe.I hope you guys enjoy it <3

𖤐There was this one time where Atsumu fell off the swing and he started sobbing, samu was on the swing next to him thinking why was Tsumu crying. In order to give him company he falls off the swing and supports his brother by crying with him (🤨)

𖤐 As kids whenever people came at their house to visit them on new year Osamu always received two gifts. He would first greet the guests that came in and would thank them when they would give him the gift. And he would go second time (getting in character as Atsumu) and would take his gift as well.

𖤐 one time a guy tried stealing Atsumu’s chocolates and he couldn’t fight back . Samu comes out of nowhere and steals the chocolate back and said “good boys don’t make ppl cry” guess who was crying now? Atsumu sticks his tongue out teasing the guy who made him cry.

𖤐 Their mother sometimes would get confused when she watches them steal cookies ( was it Atsumu or Osamu?)

𖤐 Osamu was quite moody one day and wanted nothing but to be left alone . How can he when he has a brother like Atsumu? Atsumu tries playing with his brother by following him around. They both were on the sofa jumping on it Atsumu tried pushing him off but then again you reap as you sow. Osamu pushes him off the couch which lead Atsumu to fall on his face and his ass up.

𖤐whenever Atsumu wanted more candies from their grandma he’d go there twice getting in character as Osamu and steal his parts of candies.

𖤐in park where their mother used to take them to play . The swing always had a cue for the kids to sit on it. Atsumu would go twice in place of his brother and Osamu would never get his turn :( but in return Osamu received more toys than his brother .

𖤐 there was a little girl who liked Osamu a lot but she couldn’t tell him that. Atsumu knowing the truth met up with her pretending to be his brother and makes it official between Osamu and her. Samu still doesn’t know when did she ask him out?

𖤐 Their father was in the duty to take care of them. He was busy with some office work and he didn’t even realise that he fed Osamu twice and Atsumu not even once . When their mother got home their father got a good amount of hearing from her.

𖤐Whenever anyone said something bad about Atsumu or vice versa they would always have each other’s back and stand for themselves.

𖤐 Atsumu is scared of one of the neighbours whereas Osamu wasn’t. During trick or treating (Halloween) Osamu would always go and ask the aunt for candies whereas Atsumu used to hide behind the tree. After receiving some candies ‘Samu would trade his brother’s costume and would get him candies. But only half of the candies would be given to Atsumu since he is a “scaredy cat” (as quoted by Osamu)

𖤐 Miya’s were out for shopping and Osamu didn’t like the shirt which their mother selected as a “good” brother Atsumu exchanged his shirt with his brother.

𖤐 over all they are very supportive of each other and are always bickering back and forth.

Thank you for reading. Take care<3

Reblogs are highly appreciated <3

#biscuit writes 📝 #haikyuu!! #hq #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu headcanons #hq scenarios #hq headcanons #hq imagines #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x reader #hq x you #hq x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu crack #atsumu miya #osamu miya #atsumu x you #osamu x you #atsumu x reader #osamu x reader #msby atsumu #atsumu fluff #osamu fluff #atsumu miya x you #osamu miya x you #atsumu miya fluff #osamu miya fluff #haikyuu soft hours #hq crack

[damianodavide]

Never stopped loving you (pt. II)

Based on this prompt | Part I | Part III (will be added).

Summary: Damiano x reader [undefined gender].

When reader is confronted with their painful feelings about Damiano, they desperately needs to talk about it.

Word count: 1,5K

Consists: some fluff, more angst this time, sadness, pining.

Thanks again to @daviddamiano for proofreading. Inspired by 'Young Heart' by Birdy.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

As you were laying on your back on the towel, the sound of laughter carried over the pool, immediately followed by Ethan’s defensive response. ‘If you say so Edgar,’ replied Damiano, still laughing. Victoria, who had still been sitting on the sunbed staring at her phone, jumped up, eager to join in on teasing Ethan. Normally you would be too, but as cheerful you had felt just moments before, your mood had suddenly changed.

You couldn’t help thinking back to the first time you’d joined the band, when they just started their Il Ballo Della Vita tour. You had finished high school, and had no idea what to study. Even though Vic was younger than you were, you looked up to her for following her dream into music. It was her idea, of course, for you to join them as their photographer. ‘You are creative and you know you should do something with it,’ she had said. You worried about not fitting in, since you had never felt quite confident. After telling Vic this, she just sniggered. ‘Have you seen us,’ she’d said ‘we’re outsiders just like you.’ You knew were an average photographer at best, but eventually Vic convinced you to come.

You turned your head to the side again, seeing all four of them, now standing together in front of the glass doors. From what you could hear they were discussing the rehearsal. Damiano was standing with his back towards you, two glasses of iced coffee in his hands. You turned your eyes away from his lean stature and sighed.

It had been so easy for you to fall for him then. It had seemed like everyone knew immediately that you liked Damiano, including himself. You endured weeks of Victoria and Thomas’ knowing looks, while he always found a way to make you blush. You had often sought refuge with Ethan, since he was the only one who didn’t tease you. Not for a moment you had believed he felt the same way about you, until that first kiss in the dressing room had changed everything.

You closed your eyes shut. How could a memory that once was so intensely happy, now be so painful? Still you remembered vividly every sound, every touch, the way his dark eyes looked up close. His breath on your lips… It felt like a tight band closed around your chest. The worst of it was that you couldn’t possibly be allowed to feel this way, since you were the one who had ended it.

You heard footsteps and sat up. Damiano walked toward you. He handed you the glass and sat down cross-legged. You could only bring yourself to smile weakly at him, as you sipped the drink. Damiano, oblivious, started talking about how he’d made fun of Ethan once again. You watched his face while he talked animatedly, his hands gesturing and imitating Ethan’s voice. His warm, open expression made you feel even worse. ‘It’s always so easy,’ Damiano concluded. ‘Ha, yeah nice,’ you said. Damiano’s face fell slightly. ‘Are you all right?’ he asked. ‘Yes, of course. I’m fine, just – tired.’ You didn’t sound convincing.

‘Did I hear you’re going to rehearse in a minute?’ you tried. ‘Yes,’ Damiano answered. ‘But I’ve convinced them to give us a minute to finish our coffee.’ He smiled at you. Suddenly looking a bit unsure, he asked: ‘Will you join us? To take some pictures? I bet we’ll look amazing.’ You smiled at the sarcastic note in his voice, looking down at your glass. ‘No, sorry not this time,’ you replied. You needed some time alone to collect yourself. ‘I promised my grandma to call her back, we were supposed to call this morning.’

This was true and you were happy for the excuse. You had totally forgotten that morning when she had called, just when you were about to leave for the tattoo parlour with Damiano. ‘Of course,’ Damiano said, ‘I can’t keep hogging your attention.’ His face was unreadable. ‘No, that’s not what I meant – .’ You could slap yourself.

Before you could say anything else, Thomas appeared next to you. ‘So finally finished?’ he asked. ‘If we still want to rehearse before dinner, I think we should go inside now.’ Ethan had followed Thomas, now standing next to him silently. ‘Will you come too?’ Thomas asked, looking at you. ‘Ah – no, I’m going to call nonna’ you repeated. Thomas laughed. ‘Probably a good thing, we’ve looked better.’ He turned pointedly to Damiano, a smug look on his face. ‘Yes, lets go’ Damiano said, ignoring Thomas’ joke. As you got up to follow them, it seemed like Damiano avoided your gaze.

//

Once in your room, you were glad you could call your grandma, because you wouldn’t have to say much. As predicted, she kept rattling on. You only had to say the periodical ‘hmm’ and ‘yes’ to keep her going. The antics of her boring neighbours were now a useful distraction. After a while she finally asked how you had been. ‘Yeah, I’m fine,’ you answered. ‘And how was the tour, was it nice? Did they behave themselves? Their clothes were quite scarce weren’t they? Even Victoria’s, I’m not sure…’ ‘Yeah it was nice nonna,’ you interrupted. Their clothing was a favourite subject of hers. ‘We had lots of fun,’ you added, ‘they were really popular.’ ‘Oh that is lovely,’ she said.

When she hung up half an hour later, you wished you could’ve called longer. The anxious feeling had instantly returned. How you wished to talk to him now, say how you really felt, but you couldn’t. You would just hurt him again. Painfully you remembered how heartbroken he had been. You didn’t fit into his life, that hadn’t changed since you’d broken up. There was a knock on the door. Your stomach lurched. It wasn’t Vic, she wouldn’t have knocked. Could it…?

‘Can I come in?’ It was Ethan. ‘Y-yes of course,’ you exhaled. He opened the door. His hair was in a messy bun on top of his head. ‘Have you already finished?’ you asked. You had expected them to go on longer. ‘Yes,’ he said, hesitating in the doorway, ‘Can I ask you something?’ ‘Uh, sure?’ Puzzled you gestured to Vic’s bed and sat down on your own. For a moment you both sat there, until he finally said: ‘Something’s going on with you and Damiano.’ It wasn’t a question. You stared at him, had you been that obvious?

‘What makes you say that?’ you finally asked. Ethan frowned. ‘I don’t know, I had this feeling, ever since we started the tour. Then at the pool, there was something about the way you looked at him. Damiano wasn’t himself during the rehearsal either…’ His voice trailed off. You often forgot how perceptive he could be. You now realised yourself there had been a turning point when you came back to join the tour. Would Damiano have noticed this? ‘So?’ Ethan asked. ‘To be honest Ethan, I have no idea anymore,’ you said softly. He just looked at you, waiting for you to continue.

You hadn’t spoken to anyone about your feelings for Damiano, but now, in Ethan’s quiet presence, it spilled out. ‘I don’t know what to do,’ you said in a small voice. ‘I hoped our time apart would’ve made my feelings for him die down, but of course they haven’t. I know it’s unfair to him, I do.’ You looked at your hands lying in your lap.

Victoria had told you, hesitantly, how devastated Damiano had been. That it had taken months before he wanted to talk about it with her. ‘I think you should talk to him,’ Ethan said. You stared at him for a second, unable to speak.

‘How could I? How could I tell him now that I still – still love him? After I chose to – .’ As you looked at Ethan you suddenly had the feeling you had to defend yourself. ‘We clearly had different lives to lead! We always had to hide our love, for the paparazzi, the fans, everyone… And we kept having fights about these stupid things. I just – I couldn’t do it.’ You took a ragged breath and looked away.

‘It’s okay,’ Ethan said, softly. After a moment, he went on saying: ‘I still think you should talk to him.’ You opened your mouth, and Ethan went on quickly. ‘Okay, maybe not about that you still love him, but have you ever told him how you felt then? Why you left?’ You shook your head. ‘No, not really.’

In fact you hadn’t been able to say more than what you had rehearsed in your head without bursting into tears. You had tried to say that it wasn’t the right time for them, and that maybe they would find each other again when it was. Damiano had interrupted you, tears in his eyes, asking: ‘If I’m not enough for you now, why would I ever be?’ It still felt like a punch in the gut. You looked at your lap again, blinking. ‘Hey, shhh,’ Ethan said, patting your knee with his hand. It took you a moment to collect yourself. ‘I’m okay,’ you said finally, smiling weakly at Ethan. ‘I don’t know, maybe you’re right… ’

At that moment Victoria barged in. ‘[y/n], tell me that you want to order sushi too, the guys don’t – oh.’ Victoria looked from one to the other, mouth open. Before she could say something you cleared your throat and said: ‘Yeah, I’d love sushi.’ ‘Me too,’ Ethan added. The three of you you stared at each other, before Ethan stood up awkwardly. ‘Talk,’ he told you with a nod, and quickly walked past Victoria. ‘What was that about?’ she asked. You just shook your head apologetically. You wouldn’t be able to explain.

taglist: @rocketqueen , @tabi-toast , @butterfly-skinnylegend , @glittermalia, @queen-of-brokenhearts, @maneskinmademedoit, @oro-e-diamanti, @risingtripletaurus, @ohhoneyx, @anangelwhodidntfall, @tiaamberxx (let me know if you want to be added for part III).

#måneskin #damiano david #måneskin imagine #damiano david x reader #damiano david angst #damiano x reader #victoria de angelis #ethan torchio #thomas raggi #bonus points if you listen to young heart and are able to guess the references I've put in here #basically she wrote this fic for me #I could never have been so articulate #as if anyone will read this ha #I'm a bit afraid it will flop now my dash is good as dead

[spiderling-space]

As I mentioned before, I'm doing a piece for Balkanoid MC. It's something I can %100 relate. This will be a mix of headcanon, scenario and incorrect quote. Also each different scenario/hc/quote is separated with ----

There are a lot of countries in the Balkans. This work will focus on things that everyone living in the Balkans can relate to. I'm avoiding certain stuff because it would be too heavy for [tumblr]

Setting: MC is from the Balkans

——

MC is just thrown into a whole new world, no friends, no family, just all alone. There is nothing that resembles their home and it doesn't seem like Dire is going to do find a way for them to go back so they decide to make Ramshackle a homely place. It took them over 2 weeks to clean the entire Ramshackle with the help of Ace, Deuce, Jack, ghosts and Grim.

After the cleanup, MC wiped the floors clean one last time and then they were done. Now they were just chilling on the couch.

"Oi prefect!" Ace opens the main door and just walks in. "Let's go an-"

MC isn't listening to what he is saying. Their focus is on Ace who just walked into their house with shoes on.

"Take your goddamn shoes off and wipe the floor you stepped in."

"Don't be ridiculous, I-"

"So you've chosen death..."

Ace is confused why they are so insistent on not wearing shoes inside. "What are you talking about?"

The closest thing they have is their house slippers. They took it in their hand and hit it on their other hand, making a slapping sound. "I won't hesitate to go over there and teach you manners."

Ace gulps as he sees the look on MC's face. "I'LL DO IT!" He takes off his shoes and leaves them outside, then asks where the mop is.

After MC tells where the cleaning supplies are, there is only one thought in their head "Mama, I'm making you proud!"

———

Random TWST cast: 90s were the best years!

MC, remembers the 90s of Balkans: Lol what?

----

MC and the rest of the first years go on lunch in a restaurant. They eat it and it is time to pay

MC: Waiter, please give me the receipt, I'll pay for everyone

Ace: Niceeee

Sebek: HUMAN! DON'T INSULT ME! I HAVE MONEY TO PAY AS A KNIGHT!

Deuce: I cannot let you pay by yourself 

Jack: Thank you MC but it is not necessary

Epel: I can't either, I can pay for my food

MC: So none of you is going to fight for paying for all? 

Everyone gives them a strange look: What are you talking about?

MC, taking out their wallet: It is the Balkan way

----

Ramshackle dorm is perfectly clean and everything is well organized but there is something that's missing. MC couldn't point out what it was until they managed to get a second-hand TV in the lounge.

"My grandma's white knit thingy!" Oh boy, Mc is so happy to find the missing piece. For the record, they have never understood why their grandma would knit a square-shaped balloon net but now they just missed that homey feeling. "I'm going to knit myself as I cannot afford to buy."

After a few days and countless tries, MC manages to knit a few balloon nets and they put it everywhere in the living room such as on the coffee table, on top of the couch's backside, over the fireplace and on side tables. As the final touch, they put one on TV.

"Now it feels like grandma came over!"

-----

MC is arranging a bag that has basic needs; bottled waters, crackers, canned food, whistle, blanket, first aid kit, sleeping mat, flashlight with extra batteries, some cash, wet and dry napkins and the medicines they use

Deuce: Are you planning on going camping?

Ace: Deuce, go get us two tents, I'll be in the same one as MC and you can have a tent for yourself

MC: What? No! Where did you get that idea? Also, Ace ewww!

Ace: Hey wait a sec-

Deuce: It's because of your bag...

MC: Oh! This is my bag for an earthquake. Everything in this essential if I get stuck under the rumble

Deuce: Eh?!

Ace: Silly magicless MC, every building is protected with magic here, there has never been any damage on structures or people

MC, cries in Balkan

-----

MC, internally: Hmm, interesting, dorm members resemble their dorm's icons so much. Hmm, Ignihyde is based on Hades who is a Greek God. I heard their dorm leader is from Isle of Lamentation which is from Greek myths so he must be a Greek!

Later

MC: Idia!

Idia, silently: Oh shit

MC: My fellow Balkanoid! *tries to greet him by kissing his cheeks*

Idia, freaks out and retreats: I have no idea what they mean!

MC: Well, you are Greek

Idia: I have no idea what that means either. I'll pay you to stay away

MC: Wait, you have money?

Idia, nods

MC: You know what, I'll just leave... Clearly, you are westernized! Here I thought I met a chad Balkan fellow!

----

MC, learns that Malleus and Leona are royalty

MC: Wait, there are non-corrupted country leaders?!

Leona: Tch, there is absolutely no chance that Ferena is corrupted. You thought I was?

MC: No?

Leona: Tch herbivore...

Malleus, offended: Did you mean my grandmother?

MC: Nope! That’s why I said non corrupt

Malleus: I'm saddened by your statement. What made you think this, child of man?

MC, laughs: Bro, bro... I lived in Balkans

-------

One of the foods that MC would miss dearly is burek/börek.

They would pause and ask for a moment when someone asks about the relationship between MC's country and its neighbours and the history behind it. They only say the good parts and don't get into details much.

MC would slap the watermelon to understand if it would taste good.

MC would be overjoyed when Divus doesn't call them a useless tool for giving him the wrong tool while fixing his car.

They would secretly miss those "good morning" pictures with flowers or babies on the background sent by elderly people around MC.

If MC has to stay more than the academic term, their choice of residence would be Land of Pyroxene as it is likely to resemble Germany.

They would find it weird that countries getting along with their neighbours.

It is a weird feeling to live on their own as they expected to live with their parents until marriage or until they found a job outside the city.

MC would find it basic that people are driving automatic shifted gear.

MC would get weird looks when they tell that their mom also calls them "mom".

MC is used to greeting people by kissing each cheek so it is weird to not do that in Twisted Wonderland.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst mc #twisted wonderland mc #ace trappola #deuce spade #jack howl #epel felmier #sebek zigvolt #malleus draconia #idia shroud #leona kingscholar #incorrect twst quotes #twst headcanons #twst imagines #twisted wonderland headcanons #twst incorrect quotes #incorrect twisted wonderland quotes #twisted wonderland incorrect quotes #twisted wonderland imagines #mc/yuu

[damselofblueroses]

The Children of Paradise

Summary: Set three years after the Rumbling, a young captain of Paradise Island, Anna Doukaina suddenly learned that her husband alive during the Paradisian Revolution.

Warnings: MANGA SPOILERS AND ESPECIALLY CHAPTER 139, Descriptions of Depression and Grief, Mentions of Death, Emotional Hurt. Progress of the fiction contains nsfw / Smut, minors please do not.

Note: The idea of Paradisian Revolution and the transformation of Historia Reiss are the offspring of my imagination, I would like to think about how would Levi's aftermath of the Rumbling be in my head after I read chapter 139 :)

Word Count: 6.7k

Chapter 1: Misery of the Sea

The sky on the horizon was not dark at all.

It was shot with crimson, like a splash of blood.

And the ashes blew towards us with the salt wind from the sea.

“Just a retired one.” I said to myself in quietly. “Just like you.”

It did not help to inflate my ego and bolstering my self-confidence. I looked at to my hands, were they still in crimson, after I have been washing them over and over again?

They were pale as the moonlight, there were no single spot which was dirty on my body. I have been scrubbing my skin like wanting to tear myself from my mortal and sinner flesh since years, being a clean freak was just a default feature of my contract.

I made that deal long time ago.

When there was no white in my hair.

I could still recall the memories of selling my life. If Commander Smith could hear one of us, he would correct our words as devoting ourselves, our hearts to the salvation of humanity, however, even he knew that all of us were lying. Those high hopes, from the morons who wanted to serve humanity to the daydreamers who thought the war could be ended were buried under six feet, their remains already had to be become manures.

All of them became tools of nutrition; some of them for titans, some of them for animals, some of them for plants.

But in the end, the circle of life just continues.

And there we go. Again.

I was rubbing my hands to each other. I hate the weight of weapon, after I had to use them against humans. Against my team members, against my squad, against my friends.

In the end, the circle of war just continues.

I did not sign the deal for killing my comrades, my friends, my family. I was taught to destroy the fucking titans, not my kind.

How was I ended up in Military Police?

That was the biggest mystery of my life. I was ranking around 13th, I did not want to be in MP, therefore, I chose to wear the cape by myself. That was my bloody agreement.

I wanted to have my own wings.

When I remember that 14 years old girl, I could not help but smile at her naiveness. Her hopes. Her desires. Her dreams and loses.

I was a fool who believed humanity could be saved from the fate pending on it. Sometimes I could hear that girl’s voice in my head, lecturing me on how I could help the others, how I could be useful for humanity.

Humanity can go and fuck themselves.

I had no debt for people, I had already given to them everything I have.

So why the heck you are here, holding a rifle and targeting a high ranked commander of Yeagerist Unit?

My answer was so simple. I did not have anything to prove to those rats over the streets, but I hated to live in a new war. My war was ended when Eren Yeager and his rumbling were defeated, my war was ended when I saw that girl, Mikasa Ackerman’s endless longing for Eren Yeager, poor girl was spending her days and nights just for being with a ghost, a memory.

My war was ended when the Titan Curse was broken.

I was mourning for the people I lost since I was 10 years old. Losing my beloved ones started before I joined into the army when my entire town was smashed by an unexpected titan attack. They reported the incident like this, unexpected, if someone could expect a titan attack. I still had nightmares which composed by the screams of my friends and my family.

Worst… My little sister’s.

There were a few of survivors, a cousin of mine, me, two neighbours and a father, a grandma, four kids, a baby, and my grandpa.

We moved to Shiganshina before its doom before that those shit-faces Reiner and Berthold attacked to there. My grandpa died after one year when we started a life in the suburbs of Shiganshina.

I was all by myself.

There was two options ahead of me, join the army or work as a maiden. There was a shortage of jobs where I could work as a handmaid, so I went to the registration. I had to find a shelter for myself, there was no one who could take care of me, I had no one who I could trust on. I had to join into military if I wanted to live even for couple of days more.

Commander Smith would be rolled on the other side in his grave, but I never devote my heart to a fucking noble aim or shitty high hope.

I just did what I had to do in order to survive.

But survivingcosted me everything I had.

I was around 11 years old when they took me into the training and since then my heart became a graveyard of my beloved ones.

To my dismay, I had a perfect memory. I remember almost every day of my life, beyond, even the little details that were given to me, Hange and I were not very close for nothing.

Hange…

I was mourning for my friends. My comrades. My companions. My lover.

Nonchalantly I touched my left ring finger and rubbed it before pulled the trigger.

Why I am here and continuing to fight?

My war had not been ended yet. I was mourning but I refused to mourn for those people who died for their purposes. That’s why I was pulling the trigger, putting my life at risk again and killing that bastard with a single bullet.

I knew that my comrades were still watching me above, I would do everything to make them proud. That’s why I was still fighting back with a world where it was extremely cruel.

I used the bricks as a natural shield for myself and disassembled the rifle as fast as possible.

“That was for Hange, you bastards.” I murmured to myself. “She did not die to see Paradis under the yoke of your crazy queen.”

I could feel that Hange was nodding at my words just like she was standing next to me. I knew that no one from my comrades could approve this world where Historia Reiss ruled and transformed it to another planet only to fight.

Tatakae, was our motto. Tatakae, was our national anthem. Tatakae, tatakae, tatakae.

I remembered once I have heard this from Eren Yeager when they kept him into the prison, when Hange went to see him.

He was repeating tatakae like a chant, but I was sure he did not sacrifice everything he had just to see a mad queen on the throne of Paradis, or the army that was named as Yeagerists and divided into new units.

What did it mean? Being a Yeagerist?

Supporting mass genocide or sacrificing yourself for a plan?

For me both options were not the best ones, but if I had to prefer, I would sacrifice myself for a plan like breaking the titan curse.

But in my understanding, there was no place to the toleration of a control freak queen and her decisions to start another endless war.

That’s why I was walking around my second destination today. I was very famous of my quietness, speed and logic especially when it came to assassinate someone.

I learned every trick and move from a retired criminal.

I was like a sculpture on his hands, and he craved me till I became exactly what he wanted.

I sat on the edge of roof and started to count.

Revolution, we call this. Revolution.

I pulled my trigger again and did not bother to see the result. I knew that I killed two important commanders, and I was going to kill the last name for today. The headmaster of the palace, Edward Strauss, then I could go back to the home.

Liberty, we call our aim. Liberty.

Have we ever got a proper taste of liberty?

Have we ever got close to be free?

Have we ever reached a point where we could live far away from the sounds of broken bones, the smell of blood?

Have we ever just enjoyed our lives and let ourselves to live freely?

“That was for Levi.” I whispered before started to walk again. As always, saying his name was the hardest one. I had any idea about his life, I even did not know if he was living or not after the explosion, but I always made sure that naming him among my beloved ones.

He was.

“Please, join me, Captain Doukaina.”

I smiled to the young, energetic blonde boy who was sitting on the bench by himself in the middle of night. His ocean blue eyes were not as same as the time we met.

“You are grown up, huh, Armin?” I bestowed my hand to him. His face was brightened. “I have heard your stories enough for a life-time.”

“I tried to do my best.” he was modest as he was a trainer. “But my best was not enough to save everyone.”

Poor kid. He was still in pain of losing his friends. Eren and Mikasa were the closest thing to a family for him. His shelters. I remembered the day when they went under the yoke of Shadis. Armin was really tiny to be compared with a lot of boys instead of Eren, Jean or even Connie.

“It was not about your efforts.” I was very honest. “All of you did your best, but you cannot challenge to some paths. You knew better than me.”

“Yeah.” he beamed. “I learn the paths with all my heart, Captain.”

I remembered this kid was one of the nines…

“Armin,” I raised one hand. “Can you stop calling me as captain? I already dropped the titles I had once. Call me Anna. Just Anna.”

“Okey, Anna.” he tried my name on his tongue just like my name was tangy. “It is a little bit hard; you know.”

“Old habit never dies.” I beamed to him, enough to made him blush a little bit more. “So, how was your day before I bumped into you?”

“Extreme.” he smiled. “I am trying to deal with two lieutenants who do not want to cooperate with us, however they already joined into the resistance. I cannot let them go as they know so much.”

“What do you think to do?”

“I am going to persuade them.” he burrowed his eyebrows. “I wish the things could be different, but we are still in war.”

“Who are these two lieutenants?” I murmured. “If they will not change their minds after your speech, maybe we have to go for different tricks.”

“One of them is Lieutenant Arya Springer, a distant cousin of Connie; the other one is Lieutenant Johann Willenburg.”

“I know Willenburg.” I sighed. “A total blockhead.”

“Well, he is one of the best shooters.” he pinched the bridge of his nose. “There was nothing I could do when he wanted to join since he has a strong reputation.”

“Yeah, these guys are so stubborn when it comes to fucking reputation.” I exhaled. “They want all the heroes in their team.”

“I could kill someone to have Captain Levi in my team.” Armin laughed. “But he rejected to come back with us.

I stared at Armin like I could not see him anymore. His words were echoing in my mind like a severe, horrendous, and horrific chant that had given hope to the audience, hoping that everything was going to be okey at the end.

“Cap- Anna?” he reached to me. “Anna, are you okey? Shit, you look like on the verge of fainti-

“Armin.” I grabbed his hand with all my strength. “Armin, tell me, is Levi alive?”

“Yes, he is.” he gave me a weird look. “He is in Marley, living with Gabi and Falco, do you remember those two Marleyan kids?”

Levi is alive.

“He did not contact with me.” I murmured to myself. I was not seeing Armin for real, I felt dizzy, my heart was pounding, my breathing pace was quickening, my blood was rushing in my veins. “Why did he not alert me?”

“How much you know about Captain?” Armin carefully interrogated. “I mean after the Titans war?”

“I only know the explosion because of that fucking monkey.” I hissed. I cannot feel my legs. “My knowledge is little, I could not learn anything, there was no one to tell me.”

“Do you want to learn?”

“What kind of question is that Armin?” I yelled without control. “I want to learn what the fuck happened to that bastard!”

“He does not want to be back, because he is not the Captain Levi Ackerman anymore. At least he thinks like that.”

“Ha?”

“After the explosion, Captain Hange found him, actually saved him from Floch and Yelena. To sum up, he was healed, he was still fighting when we ended the war, but his all body is covered with scars, he lost one eye and two fingers, in addition he has some problems with his legs. He uses a wheelchair time to time.”

My chin was dropped into the ground while my soul was leaving my body.

“So?” I heard my voice. “But he is alive, right?”

“Yes, he is.”

“And he thinks we do not need him anymore.” my brain started to function again. “Son of a bitch, he believes that we could not need him.”

“Exactly.” Armin approved. “At least this is what I believe also. I mean, I tried to have a civilized conversation with Captain, but you know how he is. He just sent me off.”

“You cannot have civilized conversations with Levi Ackerman.” I looked at him by gaining my self-control again. “Armin, you are the leader of this resistance. I want to go and drag him back.”

“Ha?” I knew I caught him guard off, but I really had no fucks to give.

“I am going to Marley.” I stood up. “If he thinks he can save his ass from this hell, he is wrong.”

“He does not want to s-

“He is going to see me.” I cut the shit off. Although his words, Armin was watching me with an admiration. “He owes me, you do not know how much he owes me.”

“How much he owes you?” he asked diligently. This was something about Armin, he was always so careful catching the nuances.

“A life.” I was not a sweet talker; I have never been till now. I suddenly scrubbed the wraps on two of my fingers like I have been doing every time I had talked about Levi. “If you will not let me to go, I have no choice but break some bones of your body, so you cannot prevent me.”

“You cannot across the sea without the documents in need, money and protection.” Armin raised his hands. “I do not object you, if you think you can bring Captain Levi back, I fully approve that. But you ne-

“I already have everything you mentioned. I have money, I can protect myself better than anyone can do for me, and I possess the documents, my identification card, my health report and insurance. Marley wants to see them, right?”

“Yes.” Armin nod but it was very clear he was surprised. “Since when you prepared all of these?”

“Do not make a wrong deduction.” I inhaled. “I did not prepare them in order to flee if I have to. My brother is one of the soldiers who chose to stay in Marley, I keep those documents because I wanted to be organized.”

“Well…” Armin stood up. “I guess there is no way to stop you, you will do what you decide on. I give you my consent, no better than this, I command you as the leader of resistance. Go and escort Captain Levi back to Paradise.”

“Your wish is my command.” I groaned and shook his hand. He was a little bit confused, he hesitated to send me over, but he exactly knew that he could not halt me.

Nothing can avert me from my way at this point.

My blood was boiling, I felt like someone was choking me. I could not believe that Levi was still alive and to my dismay he let me to think he was dead.

I spent last three years to mourn for him, and he did not bother himself to let me he is alive.

I rushed back to my little flat where the memories really became a burden. Every night was another nightmare in this place, every piece of the area carried something belonged to Levi.

I really cannot recall every minute I whimper his name, crying and longing for him.

And he did not let me know.

Since when he became a selfish bastard like this?

How could he?

I grabbed some clothes, the basic requirements in need, some food, and beverages into my luggage. Even this fucking luggage belonged to Levi once. I angrily wiped the tears off, I was definitely frustrated, mad and horrified by his extremely self-centred decision.

So, he is living, and he let me to believe that he is dead?

Unbelievable.

How could he do that to me?

I even did not bother to check how could I reach to Marley. I only know that I had to go to the ports, that was going to what I do. I left the home and started to my new journey.

When I will find you, Ackerman, you will pray to be dead.

Marley.

I was sitting on the benches of the boat by watching the notorious walls of Heaven, at least, what had been left from that. Paradise made sure its destruction, but some parts of the walls were still visible if you knew where to look.

That was my biggest problem, I always knew where to look and follow what I saw.

Even now, my biggest problem is connected my ultimate problem: Levi Ackerman.

He was always what I saw, whose I followed without even a single hesitation. Wherever Levi goes, I go, that’s my deal.

For a moment, 18 years old version of me appeared in front of my blurry eyes. I still could see her arms tangled around her chest with a determined face expression, standing before Commander Erwin, being examined by curious eyes.

“Captain Levi wanted you into his squad.” Commander slightly raised his eyebrow. He was more than curious; it was very obvious that he could not see a logical reason behind Captain’s request. “Before approving your promotion, I would like to ask you one question.”

“All ears, Commander.”

“You devoted your heart, no discussion on that.” he stood up and took his steps towards me. I was suffocating because of the power his glare. “But to what? I always wonder that.”

“To whom, you mean?” I questioned his question, for a second, a ghost of smirk formed around his lips but as usual he controlled himself so swiftly. He approved me with his head, I knew that today or tomorrow I had to answer this question.

I was too tired to hold it back.

I was too naïve to try to disguise my true colours.

“I devoted my heart to Captain Levi.” I said. Plain and clear.

Commander did not reply to me. He just looked at me for a minute then smiled. I was afraid of seeing his smile, with all my respect to him, when he smiled, I always felt the goosebumps all over my body, his smile was irking my self-defence system. I felt like I was trapped and dragged into something I should have not want to do, but I was supposed to perform.

When Commander smiled, I felt like I was a puppet in his hands like every cadet in the Scouts.

I had been questioning every incident, decision, and stage of my life since that day. Was I really acknowledged of my words when I blatantly stated my devotion to Levi?

What had I gained in return of my devotion?

A journey to Marley by myself, countless corpses on my conscious and permanent blood traces on my hands.

A myriad of sleepless nights.

Longing for someone who never comes back.

I clenched my fists over the fabric of my skirt. I hated wearing skirts, but Levi persuaded me to wear them when we had to peel ourselves out of uniforms.

I always suspected Levi had something with the skirts, those soft and pastel ones.

What the fuck you are thinking right now?

I could feel my nails digging into my palms, they were going to leave some marks for sure. Maybe a little bit blood too.

Maybe I should have kept myself in Paradise, with my duty. I could distract myself with new missions, new plans, and decisions. Maybe it was not the best option for me, maybe I really had to respect his decision and never went on board to drag him back.

Back to hell.

To the hell he lost everyone whose were very dear to him.

I was cruel and reckless, he had been losing more than anyone else, he had been in such a hell even before people labelled him as the humanity’s strongest. Just once he told me how sick and tired he was of that humanity’s strongest shit.

How much he wanted to leave all these behind himself.

And now, I was on my way to drag him back.

I could feel the panic started to invade my body and affected my limbs; I immediately bit my lower lip in order to keep my mind straight.

Even this little trick, you learned from Levi.

A strong smell of salt rushed all over me with the promising sound of waves. I lifted my head up, my hands automatically turned into the fists.

He already dared to break his promise, why should I care for his thoughts and desires? He did not think of mine, he decided all by himself. Why should I be upset for him?

I could easily forgive him, to be honest, I have already forgiven him for leaving his hell behind. What I have been not going easy on was his decision to leave mebehind like I was a part of his personal abyss. He was the last one who could break a promise, and he never choose a path which could make him to regret of his selection. I knew his way of thinking to the bits, in these circumstances more than I could wish for, if he concluded on the way to follow, he made sure that he would not be regretful. Needless to say, if he chose to leave me behind, it was the solid proof of his view of me.

I mourned for him every second of my life since the end of war, my feelings were always so complicated towards Levi, but I was always certain on my love for him.

My feelings were not reciprocated. I could understand my one-sided affection and its heartbreak if he did not give me a promise for lifetime.

While the boat was arriving the shores of Marley, I was definitely not in my best mood. I could not name all the frustration, fear, anxiety, anger I felt, but at the same time I was so excited. The silence of my mind was sudden and was not like it normally was, it was a total, dead silence, laden with an uncomfortable tension that cut me like the edge of dull blades. There were words on the very tip of my tongue that every inch of myself burned to scream, but my lips were like sealed. My posture was changed by our arriving to the port of Marley, I stood up and took a deep breathe. The air was so thick, I could not deny but I remained bound by unspoken thoughts and empty promises. When the doors were opened to the passengers, I grabbed my luggage and stepped into the foreign lands.

I have been in Marley before for educational reasons. After the war, I was one of the soldiers or civilians who were selected as the students go abroad, I spent two years here by attending college. After graduation, the government of Paradise assigned me as the head of royal library because I denied giving courses to the students.

I could work as a librarian. I could not work as a teacher, not again, I could not bound myself to the pupils. Even thinking about having students around me causing a lump in the middle of my throat. I was not made for mentoring kids, as my own history could vouch for that.

I still hear those screams.

Memories were stuck in my head and for the life of me, I could not erase them from my thoughts. Every little step I took, the labyrinth of my memory has been providing me with a new reason of pain. Anger. Frustration. Sadness.

Loneliness.

I have been always by myself. I fought for my life, my troop, my battalion, my people, my country, and there was no end of the shitty list. Dedicate your heart, we have been trained, dedicate your hearts. My eyes were masked in sheer layer of moisture, I knew, my tears of anger because the world was being nothing but cruel to me. I knew this way of thinking was not being entirely rational, I wanted to hear that it was not my fault, I wanted someone to praise my efforts.

And that someone has been living the best of his life in a little shop where it occupied a very good, visible spot of one of the main streets of city, where I was standing just in front of the door.

I had been losing the understanding of time, but when I found myself in front of the ivory-coloured door, of course Levi would kill someone who can even propose choosing another colour, I checked my clock.

Should I go inside?

I did not know why he did not send a message to me, and I did not fully recall all the circumstances of our shared past, either. I was so determined to see and drag him back, but now, all I remembered was the feeling of falling, crumbling, crawling, and seething pains before blackness. There were blurry bits and pieces, but when I tried to reassemble them, there were just the colour red. Red again, crimson red.

What should I say if I go inside?

What will happen if he is inside?

What if he would be disappointed to see me?

I reached to the knub of door, however all power I had till now was leaving me. Emptiness was what I felt, there was no driving force, there was even no anger against his crimes.

My heart was pounding on my throat, my sight was blurry, then I let the knub of door and turned my back to the shop. I did not want to see what was inside of that little tea shop, even thought it was one of the smallest shops I have ever seen, it was certain that that shop was bigger than my life and more valuable than me in the eyes of Levi Ackerman.

Although I was full of retaliation feelings, I could feel anything but my love for him.

Why should I step back into his life again, when his decision keeping me away from him is clear as fuck?

The city lights peeked through the cracks of the pavement, creating a jagged patch of gold in the way as I took it as a sign for me in order to keep going by myself. I just looked at the door once more, then I inhaled.

I have to write an explanation to Armin as formally. He loves me, but he is not the type of letting the issue go.

“Excuse me?” I heard a young but strong boy voice. “Captain Doukaina?”

I closed my eyes, because I recognized the owner of this voice like hearing it just one yesterday. I kept remain to walk, acting like I did not hear my name but just in one second, a cheerful, energetic face jumped into me.

“YOU ARE RIGHT, FALCO!” Gabi screamed all the air out of her lungs. “SHE IS CAPTAIN DOUKAINA!”

“Ah.” this was only thing I could said. “Hi, Gabi.”

She hesitantly looking at me, her arms were reaching to me, but she knew that I had been refusing to talk with her for long time until that night I had to keep both of them between my arms, protecting them as the frightened kids who survived.

“You can.” I approved her attempt. “We are not enemies, and I am sure both of us changed a lot.”

She did not wait to hear the end of my words; she just hug me like I was the miracle of life. Falco, always kinder than Gabi, patiently waited for his line.

More like waited for Gabi not being extra.

“How are you?” he asked me politely, I could laugh his disgusted face towards Gabi who was circling around me by murmuring an inaudible song.

“I am very well.” Liar. “I hope you are doing well, either.”

“Yes, we are living with Uncle Onyankopon and helping to Mr. Ackerman for running tea shop.” Gabi shared this two information with everyone on the street.

My heart was hammering in my chest to hear that Mr. Ackerman, I hated myself for my reaction, but the kids were unaware of the glossiness glazing over my eyes.

“Did you come to visit us?” Gabi asked. “Why it took this much, we have been waiting for you since the end of war?”

“Gabi, please have some manners.” Falco murmured to her. “Captain Doukaina has her own life, you knew that.”

“Ah.” Gabi stopped and looked at me in the face. “I am sorry, I did not want to be rude, but I thought you would have come very long time ago. We missed you.”

“I did not know where you are.” I spilled the beans without thinking. “No one told me.”

“Uncle Onyankopon said tha-

“She means that maybe there was a problem between Marley and Paradise communication ways.” Falco made a heroic attempt to save a secret from me, but I was playing the game even before he was born. I gave him my signed deathly glare and turned back to Gabi.

“What he says?”

“Mr. Ackerman insisted on you have to live your own life.” Gabi grumbled. “Falco and I tried to persuade him to call you here, but Uncle said he could not dare to play against to Mr. Ackerman.”

“Mr. Ackerman can go to hell.” I cursed beneath my breath. Falco heard me for sure, but Gabi was so busy giving me a detailed story of almost 5 years after the war. Mostly I did not listen her, but I caught two important details.

She knew that I attended college here in Marley.

She knew that I was the head of royal library in Paradise.

Are you still watching me Levi, or she knows these because of another reason?

“Would like to come inside?” Falco interrupted Gabi’s endless stories. “I strongly believe that you came here today, we have fresh bakery and tea, and we happily serve them to you, Captain.”

“Call me Anna.” I smiled to him. What is these kids’ fault? They wanted me with them, they were trying to call me back. How could I remain angry towards them? “Thank you for your kind inv- Gabi, what are you doing?!”

“You have to taste blueberry spongy cake!” she yelled at me. Maybe I can exactly remain angry towards Gabi? “And we have a delicious Earl Grey which came to the shop just a few hours ago. You like Earl Grey, right? Plain, strong and harmonious.”

“How do you know that?” I could not help but ask.

“Mr. Ackerman.” she gave me a weird look like it was very usual, talking about my preferences between the folk of this fucking tea shop. “When he orders Earl Grey, he always check the quality of tea according to the rule of Doukaina.”

“What the fuck?” I tossed my head back, my feet tapping on the pavement. “Gabi, I am really sorry, and I have no intention making you upset but seriously I understand anything you say.”

“The rule of Doukaina is our standards in order to value everything around us.” I heard a baritone voice which I was fucking familiar with. “Welcome to Marley, Captain.”

“Onyankopon.” I pressed my lips into each other. I could not help but felt the irritation against him. He smiled to me by raising his hands.

“I have nothing.” He remained his posture. “Can I join you?”

“We will serve to Captain.” Falco explained. “She just came to Marley today; she has to be thirsty and hungry.”

“No.” I shook my head. “I am very well, but tired. If you could allow me to go back to my flat, it would-

“No!” Gabi just sticked into my arm like a gummy. “We will not, right Falco?”

“What are you doing there, brats?” I heard another voice. Baritone. Strong. Grumpy. Familiar to giving orders. “Did you take a hostage in a blink of eye?”

“She is Captain Doukaina!” Gabi screamed like she was sharing the most wonderful miracle of this bloody world. “How can we take her as a hostage, Mr. Ackerman? She is the cleverest as you always say!”

“Captain Doukaina?” I heard his voice again, full of nothing but disbelief. “JesusfuckingChrist, do you lose your mind?”

“I am here.” I choked out loudly enough for him to hear my voice. “Anna Doukaina.”

There was silence like our walls circling Paradise before we crumbled them down.

“Anna Doukaina.” the voice repeated my name again. Would he be crueller to me, still staying in the shadows?

“Yes.” I lifted my chin and let all emotions filled me up. Did I really unload these 5 years on him, in front of everyone here? I knew I was not going to, but God, if I had the courage, I would. I would ruin his life; I would set everything he did on fire and leave here as the happiest woman.

He came out of that fucking ivory door, and I forgot how to breathe.

No one told me how he was.

No one told me how bad he was hurt.

No one told me how horrible his scars were.

Onyankopon grabbed the kids due to rapidly increasing tension, even though Gabi’s rejections, and left Levi and me by all alone in front of the tea shop. We were staring each other like enemies, we could be enemies, I wondered if I had ever felt like this before in my life.

“Anna Doukaina.” he sighed at me. I clenched my fists and took a really long, refreshing, and deep breath. “You are not Anna Doukaina.”

“Ah.” I barely held myself back from making a scene. “I guess I know my identity better than you, Captain Ackerman.”

“It seems you forget.” he took one step towards me. I could see all of his face, all the stitches, all the lines and his eyes. Goddamnit, his Aegean eyes. “Your name was changed, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah.” I raised my left hand and showed him the little bandage which I always wrapped on my finger.

“Why did you wrap your finger?” he dared to ask to me by furrowing his eyebrows.

“What should I do?” I nicely asked but I could feel the taste of blood inside of my mouth. “Should I unwrap the bandage? What is the point of it?”

“Since when married woman keeps their marriage rings under cover?” he grunted, but he was careful as always not causing any unwarranted events. I could easily see he was fuming inside; he was calculating but I could not understand the rest of his feelings.

He was upset, that was so clear.

He did not want to see me, that was another clear point.

“They do.” I forced myself to smile. Do not let him to see your feelings. “If their wedded husband are not with them.”

“So, were you covering your ring since the last 5 years?”

“Every day of it, and I enjoyed that a lot.”

“Why you did not take it off, Godfuckingdamnit, if you were so upset by wearing it?!”

“Protection.” I chuckled. Make him mad. Give nothing but only pain to him if you can. “You know, if I will financially collapse, I can always sell this. It is 24k gold. A luxury for Paradise.”

“You are not changed even a bit.” he leaned back on the heels of his feet. “Still a witch.”

“I changed a lot.” I said. Back in the Corps, I was loud and commanding, I was a leader, one of the cleverest. Now, I was timid and tired, I may be broken down because of his absence. “I am not a witch anymore; I became a bitch.”

“Yes, I can see that.” he nod. Very sweet of Levi. “Why you are here?”

“I came because I am looking for my husband.” I said.

“Why?”

“To ruin his life.” I smiled. “I want ruin that bastard for letting me down, for letting me mourn for him every fucking day, for everything he did to me.”

Levi glared at me with a deadpanned face. I unwrapped my bandage and showed my hand to him.

“I have been waiting for this since I learned you are alive.” I murmured. “I want a divorce.”

“What?” his face was entirely blank.

“I always thought you were dead, but since you are unfortunately in flesh and soul, I want a fucking divorce.” I grinned. “Do you think I across the sea in order to see you? No, Levi. No. We are going to divorce, so you have to come back with me to Paradise, then you can go to even hell if you want.”

“Thinking I was dead did not prevent you to live your life fully, huh?” he raised one eyebrow. “Why do you want a divorce right now, all of sudden? Why did you show yourself at the door of my teashop? Are you run out of money?”

“You cannot hit me with these, Captain.” I chuckled and took the ring out of my finger. “See? I came for giving this back to you.”

I directly went to him, in front of him, my mind did not catch any of my moves or decisions. I never felt like this in my life, I was like captured by another soul, I was watching myself out of my body. I grabbed his hand, opened his palm and placed the ring.

“You can do whatever you want with your fucking ring.” I hissed at him. My voice was keeping all the pain as a secret. Even now, even I am full of pain, the only thing I want is hugging and kissing him, staying at his side forever! “I came to say this.”

I turned back to him immediately, but before my first step, he grabbed my wrist and forced me to walk with him inside of his tea shop. He literally dragged me into the next table and held my hand with all force.

“You are my wife.” he dropped his voice to lowest version. Damnit, how he dare to give me that voice, he uses when I was a cadet?! “You are mine.”

“Ah, really?” I pushed him back. “Where were you if I am your wife?”

“Where were you?” he questioned my question. “If I am your husband, why you were not with your husband? Why did you not come to find me after the war?”

“MR. ACKERMAN!” Someone yelled by entering from the door, and both of us turned to the boy. “I NE- wow.”

The little blond kid just stared at Levi, looking like a revengeful god and me, pressed on the table as a suspected witch. His little mouth shaped as an O.

“What happened?” he asked.

“No- nothing. We did not know you have visitors. Hi, lady!”

“I do not have a visitor, Paul.” Levi gave me a piercing look. Do not fall. Do not fall. “She is my wife, Mrs. Ackerman.”

“DO YOU HAVE A WIFE?!” The little kid screamed for his dear life.

“No, I am not h-

“Yes, I have.” Levi said. “And she is going to live with me from now on.”

#leviackerman #levi ackerman #levi ackerman oneshot #levi ackerman angst #levi ackerman fluff #levi ackerman headcanons #levi ackerman imagine #levi ackerman fic #aot #attack on titan #aot smut #snk #aot fic #levi #attack on titan fanfiction #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan levi #captain levi #levi aot

[soldatbarnes]

Six Months

Summary: Your daughter finds out how little time you spent with your husband before marrying him. 

Bucky Barnes X Reader (kinda Mechanic!Bucky/Modern AU?); a smidge of Brock Rumlow X Reader

Word Count: 2291

Warnings: Brock Rumlow being the worst. A car accident. Cheesy fluff.

A/N: I’m sorry, I’m very rusty. I hope everybody likes this!! I don’t really have a tag list anymore because I lost it, so I didn’t know who to tag! I hope you all enjoy this! Feedback would be incredible :) <3

You were sitting at your kitchen table, looking over special trinkets from your time with the love of your life. It was almost your 30th wedding anniversary, and you were feeling sentimental for the man that had captured your heart. You still couldn’t believe it. Thirty years. Having met him pretty young, you’d spent more of your lives together than apart. It was challenging sure, but you wouldn’t give him up for the world.  

Gazing at a picture from your first anniversary together, you were startled when you heard your front door open. Bucky wasn’t due back for a few hours yet. 

“Mom??” your daughter, Leigh called out. You sighed with relief, forgetting she was in the area today and promised to stop by. 

“In the kitchen Baby!” you smiled, piling pictures up together. You were so lucky. Your husband is incredible and you’d raised two amazing kids with him. 

“Watcha doin’?” she asked, flopping into a chair and nosing over the papers on the table. 

“Oh, just looking for an idea of what to do for your father this year.” you sighed. 

“I thought you guys were gonna renew your vows?” Leigh questioned, looking excited. She loved the prospect of being able to see you and your husband at a ‘second wedding’. Growing up she’d always adored how much you and Bucky loved each other, and worked together as a team, stating that she’d never settle down until she found what you had. 

“Well, we were thinking about it, but your father’s been working so hard lately, I don’t want to take a vacation when he has so much on his plate.” 

“Dad barely fixes cars anymore and spends most of his time at work drinking coffee with Uncle Steve.” Leigh laughed. “I’m sure he can take a little vacation with you. All you’d have to do is ask.” 

You chuckled. She had a point. When you first met Bucky he was a young mechanic, barely nineteen, working for your best friend in the world, Steve. Now, at almost fifty, he owned his own shop and mostly supervised the mechanics that worked for him. You glanced at your daughter, a beautiful mix of both yours and Bucky’s best features, she was concentrated on a piece of paper in front of her. 

“What?? Six months…” she mumbled. “Mom!!”

“What?” you were confused at her sudden outburst. 

“You and dad got married like, seven months before JJ was born!” 

“Yeah, I actually found out I was pregnant shortly after the wedding. I told you that.” 

“But you didn’t tell me that you and dad got married after like, six freakin’ months!!” you watched as she shook your marriage certificate around. “That’s barely enough time to get to know anybody!!” 

“Leigh relax. When you know, you know.” you shrugged. 

“I’ve barely had friendships that long!!” she was completely astounded. 

“Your dad has always been an incredibly special man.” you shook your head, remembering your first meeting. 

“Was it love at first sight or some crap?” Leigh asked. 

“Oh no. I didn’t even want to meet your father. I was completely done with all men at that point.” 

“Then how???” 

“Well it all started when I met a man named Brock…” 

After looking for an apartment for months, you’d finally found the place. It was a small two bedroom in Brooklyn that you could barely afford, but it was your new home. You couldn’t go back to your family. You had to survive on your own. Thankfully before you moved in, you found the perfect roommate, Wanda. 

Wanda was a little eccentric, but you liked her energy. You worked with her at a small coffee shop in the same area as your apartment building and you finally felt like you were getting a little closer at being able to stand on your own two feet. 

That was, until the day you were set to move in. Wanda had come to you, completely apologetic, stating that she was going to be moving in with her boyfriend instead. You couldn’t blame her. She’d been hoping he would ask for months before you even set up for her to live with you. The only problem was that the rent was a little steep for you to pay all on your own. 

But you got through. You even set aside a rainy day fund, in case of emergencies in your apartment, just in case you got sick or had to miss work, so you’d still make rent. 

Once again, things were looking up. And then you met him.

Brock Rumlow seemed charming at first. He was good looking, had a decent job, and knew some of your closest friends. At some point he’d run into some trouble, and had nowhere to go. Being the kind person that you are, you let him rent out the other room in your apartment. One thing led to another, and you’d begun dating. Everybody was supportive, except for your best friend Steve. 

Steve didn’t trust him at all. But wouldn’t give you any reasons as to why being with Brock was a bad idea. So you’d ignored him. 

Poor choice. 

On Christmas Eve, you were at Steve’s for a get together, with Brock. He had too much to drink and refused to take up Steve’s offer for you both to just spend the night until he’d sobered up in the morning. When you told him that you’d call a cab, he started to freak out. He didn’t want his precious car to be stuck there until morning. With a bad storm brewing outside, you tried to fight him on it, but it was no use. He just yelled over you until you quieted down. Begrudgingly you’d agreed to drive you both back home. 

After hugging Steve you headed out, an uneasy feeling settling in the pit of your stomach. A feeling you’d learn to listen to later in life. 

Brock’s car was lightweight, and didn’t have proper tires to combat the harsh winter. You’d hit a patch of ice on the way home, and spun out, into a pole. To this day you still couldn’t believe his behaviour. 

“Hey, C’mon, we gotta go!” he’d yelled. 

“What?” you asked. The entire front of the vehicle was caved in, trapping you in the driver’s seat.

“I don’t have insurance on this fucking car, we gotta go!” he managed to get himself out of the wreck and began trying to pull you out of your seat. 

“Brock, that hurts, stop it!!” your legs were completed encased. 

“Get the fuck outta the car. This isn’t funny!”

“Is everything okay out here?” your head snapped to the unfamiliar voice. “I called 9-1-1, help will be here soon!” A concerned neighbour. You felt very grateful as your head began to spin, Brock’s yelling fading out. 

“I can’t fucking believe this. This guy has no idea what he’s done! I’m fucking out!” Those were the last words you’d heard from Brock Rumlow, as you blacked out. 

When you awoke later, Steve was by your side, ready to comfort you. 

“Stevie…” You’d mumbled.

“Hey darlin’.” he sighed. “How’re you feeling?”

“I’ve been better….” he grabbed your hand. 

“Look, I know you don’t need anymore bad news, but I went to your apartment this morning…” he trailed off, refusing to look you in the eye. 

“What is it?” 

“He took everything.” he choked out. “I’m so sorry…” 

When you were discharged from the hospital Steve took you to your apartment. You were shocked when you went in. It was trashed. Your stuff was strewn everywhere, clothes were cut up, glassware was smashed. You ran to your room to look for your valuables and they were all gone. Your grandma’s jewellery, gone. Your rainy day fund, gone. 

“Steve…” you couldn’t stop the tears if you’d tried. 

“It’s okay. It’ll be okay. You can come and live with Peggy and I until we can figure this out..” he rubbed your back as you cried. 

It was about two months into living with Steve and Peggy that Steve made the suggestion that made you scoff. 

“Hey,” he’d sat down beside you on the couch as your read your favourite book. “I got a guy that I work with that I’d love for you to meet.” 

“No.” was your only answer. 

“No? What do you mean ‘No’?” he looked confused. 

“No more men. I’m done with men. I still don’t know what to do about that damn apartment. I know Brock’s still paying his part of the rent, I’m just so scared to go there. So No. No men.” 

“But this guy… He’s different!” 

“None of them are different Steve. So no.” 

And he’d let it go. For a while. And then one day, when you were doing the dishes, he came to you and said “Bucky’s coming for dinner tonight. You’ll be there.” and promptly left the kitchen.  You turned to look at Peggy who shrugged. 

“He’s… A really nice guy… I promise.” she nodded. “And he’s got a really nice ass.” 

Hours later you found yourself stealing small glances at him. You were struck by how handsome he was. He was a man of very few words. It was refreshing. You both spoke very little to one another for the whole night, but it was one of the best nights you’d ever had. After dessert was over, Bucky had declared that he need to go, and early morning at the shop the next day. 

You decided to walk him to the door, feeling Steve and Peggy’s eyes on you the whole time. 

“Hey,” he turned, after stepping over the threshold. “I know it’s not my place, but Steve told me what happened with that Brock guy. He sounds like a total dick. If you want any help going to get your stuff, let me know, and I’ll be there.” 

You knew then that he was different. 

Bucky had come with you to clean up the mess that Brock had made. Steve helped too, but you barely registered his presence, too wrapped up in the man that wasn’t vying for your attention. He was simply being himself, and for that you felt relieved. 

Every moment with Bucky Barnes felt like a breath of fresh air, and every moment spent with him you’d fallen a little more and more for him. 

After two months into your relationship, the words had slipped through your lips. 

He was sitting on your couch, playing with your cat. He had cooked dinner, accepted your help with cleaning up, and now he was lounging. The cat was laying across his chest, playing with the fingers that he held up to him. Bucky was like nobody you’d ever known before, and he fit so well into your life. 

“Hey!” he’d called out, “When are you gonna join us? Watching Netflix isn’t the same without you.” he held out his arm for you to crawl into the space beside him. You sighed out the words before you could stop them. I love you. 

“What did you just say?” the words were so low you barely heard him. 

“I said ‘I love you Bucky’.” you replied, louder and more firm this time. He never once made you afraid to express your feelings. 

“That’s incredible.” he laughed. “I love you too. So much.” he declared, leaning over to give you a heartwarming kiss. 

By the fourth month you’d known. 

You were sat on his toolbox, in the shop he was working at at the time. He was sitting cross legged at your feet, taking a sip of the coffee you’d brought him. 

“Okay, so. This weekend we have Steve and Peggy’s for dinner…” he mumbled out loud. You’d moved in together soon after you’d shared ‘I love you’s’, much to Steve’s delight. “And we have Becca’s birthday brunch next Saturday…” He was always so busy, that he often went over stuff out loud with you. He always said it kept him true to his word, because you’d never let him off the hook if he missed something. 

“Busy couple of weeks..” you reached over, and tucked a stray strand of hair behind his ear. He looked a little tired, and was covered in grease. 

“That reminds me,” he smiled up at you. “Can you book the weekend after Becca’s birthday off?” 

“Ummm, sure. Why?” you asked, brow furrowing. 

“I want to take you to my cabin by the lake. Have a nice weekend, just the two of us.” he looked you in the eyes. So sincere. So unlike every interaction you’d ever had. And you knew. He was the one. So you’d asked, for him to be yours forever. And he’d said yes. 

“You proposed to dad?!” Leigh’s voice brought you back to the moment. 

“Yes! I loved, love, him so much. I have never met another person who even came close to being as incredible as your father. Except for you and your brother. Your both just like him. Sweet, caring, kind, sincere, feisty…” you trailed off. 

“It’s disgusting how much you love him.” she laughed. 

“It’s disgusting how much who loves who?” Your heart sped up. It always sped up at the sound of his voice. 

“How much I love you, Husband.” you chuckled when he appeared in the room, immediately striding to you and placing a loving kiss to your lips. 

“And I love you so much, beautiful wife.” he winked, before wrapping your daughter up in a hug. “And it’s not disgusting Leigh, it’s wonderful. Your mom makes us all better people.” 

“You’re both so cheesy.” she laughed. 

“You love it.” you responded in unison, before he leaned down and captured your lips in a kiss once more. 

#bucky #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky fluff #bucky barnes fluff #bucky fic #bucky barnes fic #bucky fanfic #bucky fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fanfiction

[tumblunni]

Random game idea that came to mind: clockwork man simulator

I dunno, i just got the general image in my head of a soft homey aesthetic equivelant of that terrible game about the androids. Itd be more like just a life-living game, like stuff like animal crossing or harvest moon. Just fully exploring the perspective of these creatures and the world that created them, rather than BOOM ACTION SETPIECES or whatever

I only have some scattered ideas for it tho, and not really any idea of a main plot or gameplay gimmick or 3 act structure or like.. Anything to take this from idea to game, lol.

SO ITS MISC IDEAS TIME

* more of an olden timey fantasy style instead of sci fi. Youre still an artificial person created to run errands for humans, but youre more of a combination of clockwork and magic. There's still an element of being made of inanimate object parts but there's also some glowy energy core or something. Possibly would be interesting if it was something unusual to use as a power source? Like i dunno, a bell or an acorn or a teacup or one of those rocks with the hole in it that sometimes wash up on beaches. Or just a glowy orb of Generically Defined Energy Substance, which flows through you like aesthetically pleasing glowy veins

* you're a service clockwork homunculus thingy, bought by a disabled person who needs help around the house. PERHAPS A SWEET OLD GRANDMA! Whatever i decide on (IT'LL PROBABLY BE THE GRANDMA), your owner is a kind person who sees you as part of the family and feels guilty using an android as they believe you are absolutely a real person and wish they could set you free. Unfortunately theyre kinda one of the people who needs androids the most, as they dont have any family who can help them. At the same time though, they are very old and quite resigned to nobody caring about them, plus theyre just a good person who'd put your life over their own. So i feel like the plot would literally start with this person trying to set you free and you are just like "i do npt understand the concept, that is not in my programming". Its become kind of a morning routine now to hear "youre free! Get out, dammit!" and have a brisk argument over breakfast that inevitably always ends with you refusing. Grandma's prpbably got so desperate they're resorting to tactics like trying to trick you into getting on the bus out of town or "if you dont leave im gonna hold my breath and i wont stop til i pass out". All inevitabley failing! So they just try and help you understand your sentience and become more independant, encouraging you to take free time every day and go around the town to enjoy yourself. Which is kinda a concept you dont understand yet, so its just like MISSION RECEIVED: WALK IN CIRCLE AROUND PERIMETER OF TOWN. And its kind of a hit and miss experience because the people in this town have never seen an android before- this magic is usually a thing for rich people and this proposed scheme of disability assistance androids is still in its test run. Some people are suspicious or hateful, but there are others who welcome you to the village and brighten up your day. Not just a world of 100% everyone assholes to make a melodramatic point delivered awfully through racist stereotypes.

* i think a good subplot with this disabled grandma would be to show her regaining her independance too. Like she starts off quite fatalistic and used to nobody caring about her, all this mobility aid stuff is new and she feels like its too complicated and she'll never get it, or its too expensive and she doesnt deserve it, or all the nonsense that ableist society drills into people. But with the support of her new friend and access to more tools to help take her life into her own hands, she starts regaining hope again! Like ironically she felt like her previous carers were all the kinds of awful things people expect these androids to be. Robotic, emotionless monsters who dont care about the person's feelings and comfort, and certainly not independance. She suffered from a lot of the same nightmares that androids do too: being forced into a rigid schedule, limited in her options, deprived of basic rights, being told how she's supposed to feel, etc. But to an android that all seems like an inefficient way to do things! My function is healing and human healing efficiency is decreased in this circumstance! I am incapable of ignoring data due to personal bias! Basically imagine MAGIC BAYMAX ok. Anyway this plot would progress with grandma regaining her smile and eventually itd be a super happy day when she's able to get her new wheelchair that she can wheel to the shops on her own without needing someone to push her. Itd be really sweet from the player's perspective to get used to saying goodbye to her every morning and then suddenly you see her wandering around the shops with everyone else and she can become a part of the vibrant town too. Im thinking give her more complex AI than all the other villagers even, like give her a more complicated set of actions and move routes and stuff like SHE IS EVERYWHERE and she is LOVING IT! Life is back where it belongs: in the hands of the person living it! And it also intensifies the message of android slavery not being necessary or moral or good. Like i mean here this lady benefitted from getting an android but literally all she needed was a friend, a healthcare professional who gave a shit, and affordable access to mobility aids. Humans could have done that if they werent lazy assholes! And this android deserves the right to the same uplifting independenceifying experience they helped this grandma have!!

* random idea: all the events you encounter on each daily walk are actually stored in your inventory as items. Memories of experiences, good or bad, become literally experience for you! They each affect stats in different ways because of what you learned from that moment. Maybe bad experiences give you combat abilities and good ones help with your daily life skills and development of personality? And its possible to crack or even shatter a memory, if new experiences end up clashing with it. Usually its just 'oh i learned the more advanced version of this skill through better understanding of why humans do it', but also traumatic memories damaging good ones, and good ones helping ease traumatic ones. And maybe you could solve puzzles and make friendships through using these memory items? Youre faced with a challenge and have to make the connections in your mind to figure out which past experience is relevant here. And becoming more talented at something would help narrow down the choices you get given? And being unskilled would do screwy stuff with the interface like putting the correct option far away near the bottom or mixing up the names and icons of each memory. (Dunno how i'd program that though!)

* Maybe character customization similar to Medabots? The games were so cool and ahead of their time, you get to collect hundreds of different robot base frames and then mix and match the parts to make your own cool aesthetic! Shame it was only used for fighting though, that could be cool in a more social game too! Like go out wearing different fashions to help befriend different people, but its more fun cos its ROBOT FASHIONS! 'hey grandma do u think fred will like this arm or this arm?' She fusses over you all excitedly cos you showing an interest in fashion is a good sign of developing free will! Though you still get stuck in logic loops of 'you should wear what you like best, honey' 'HUMAN OPINION IS OF HIGHER PRIORITY' ...god i think i just made this character so i can ramble Relateable Social Anxiety Moments BUT ROBOTS

* possible ideas for Memory Events you can find around town! Meeting a cute neighbour cat- a fascinating creature you were not programmed to deal with, as you're a hospital android who isnt even meant to leave one single room for your whole life. You get absolutely entranced by the confusing small carpet with legs, and spend all morning interrogating it on why it wishes to rub its face on you. Why is your motor overheating, tiny carpet? Human master, how do you troubleshoot this noise?

* Another idea! You get 'mission: count the steps on the stairs to town' popping out of nowhere, and at first you ignore it because this is an illogical directive that does not come from a human. But it keeps happening every time you go here!! You try finding new ways to get to town crossing through fields or forests or walking directly into the path of a horsedrawn carriage, but ALAS it seems the only efficient path is those curious curious steps! Only then do you finally realise the mystery command is coming from yourself! You're not used to this strange concept of just..wanting to do something, all by yourself. You talk to your human and she says that's 'natural curiosity', 'personality', 'free will'...things that seem impossible to understand. You ask her to take you back to the shop to get this fault fixed, but she says its good and you should try acting on it. But it'll serve no purpose!! BUT AAARGH I HAVE TO KEEP SEEING THOSE STEPS EVERYDAY!! Eventually you do count them and you find it makes you satisfied for no logical reason. And that was the end of that small crisis, but you'll forever be confused by the whole thing! The next week you're like "what if i organized all the blue things with the blue things" and youre intensely frustrated at yourself. Human grandma says this is a "taste for fashion" but you remind her that you do not have a tongue. (And then she gets you the robo parts catalog and you unlock customization. Yay!)

* Possible idea for a sad subplot! A new human visits the village and he seems very strange, sometimes seeming kind and other times being angry and standoffish. You think its a simple 'jerk with a heart of gold' story but the truth is a lot stranger! It turns out this stranger is actually an important bishop in disguise, and he has multiple androids acting as body doubles to protect him while he's on the road. Theyre supposed to just be empty husks who only know how to imitate, but they clearly have their own personalities! You're tasked with finding all these runaway androids and returning them to their master for a reward, leading to a goofy lil game of hide and seek with twelve of the same guy. But it starts to get a bit sad because they're all convinced theyre the real one, and whenever they stumble into holes in their memory they freak out. When they all see each other gathered together its an absolute despair explosion and theyre forced to face the truth. And you can help them bond together as brothers and develop their own individual identities, even helping them pick out their own new faces from your set of fashion roboparts. Sadly you cant keep them here for long because itd obviously be suspicious to have exactly twelve new people move into the town right when twelve bots went missing. So you get help from one of grandma's friends to send them off in a stagecoach to another town where they can find employment and start their own life disguised as humans. The asshole bishop obviously doesnt react well to his androids vanishing into the night, but he never thinks of blaming you because after all you're only an android and you could never choose to help others out of all that free will you dont have. He just berates you for being so incompetant as to fail his quest to find them, and you get your reward taken back. Oh no~ i am~ very ashamed~ i will go tell my human that my ocular circuits require recalibrating~ (internally: HAHA YEH FUCK U OLD MAN) Grandma is super proud of you!

And thats all i got so far

[infinitycaprogers]

Midnight Train (B.B.)| CH.2

Parings: Bucky x Reader General Summary: A story very loosely based on Journey’s ‘Don’t Stop Believing’. (I suck at a finding a general summary without spilling the beans, you guys. Sorry!) Word Count: 2k Chapter summary: You’re getting curious about your new neighbour. Warnings: None A/N: So, I wasn’t sure if this was anything good but since @trashpanda-barnes said that she loved it and seeing that I almost had 40 notes must mean that I did SOMETHING good, right? Hope you all like it and if you want to be tagged, just ask me! Feedback is always appreciated as it helps me become a better writer so that you guys can actually enjoy my writing lol. Anyways, here’s chapter Two!

Enjoy xoxo

Masterlist

Previously:

Until a loud thud jolted you awake.

You opened your eyes instantly, scanning your room for any signs of movement. After a thorough check you frantically looked for something to whack the vandalizing fool with whom dared to enter your apartment. you opened your door to reveal Nancy, still snoring away peacefully on her cushion. You left her there and turned your head to the door. It appeared to be unopened. But how -

‘THUD.’

Your thoughts haltered as you widened your eyes and crept closer to the door which lead to the hallway. you peaked through the viewing hole and saw a wave of blond hair passing by. You gasped as an all too familiar face revealed itself.

‘Steve?’

Still in shock, you opened the door just a tad to take a better look at the scene before you; A tall, broad-shouldered man, was frantically looking around him in the corridor. His blond hair, slicked back and slightly greasy, made it seem like he hadn’t been home in a few days.

Steve. Rogers. Captain America.

He appeared to make sure no one was there, or at least that’s what you derived from the situation, since he wasn’t calling anyone for help and roamed his eye over every nook and corner of the hallway. You kept peeping and gathering more information, bending your knees to get a different point of view.

After checking, he whistled two short tones which alerted another figure, cloaked in the darkness of the corners of the hall. He stepped forward and appeared to be even more dishevelled than the blond superhero.

a small gasp escaped your breath being taken aback by his presence, alerting the Captain that another person appeared present in the whole ordeal. His eyes went wide, searching for any movement, which was your unfortunate cue to close the door. The lock clicked. A usually quiet sound turned into a deafening one in this silence and you were certain to be discovered. You let yourself fall as quietly as you could with your back against the door, a hand thrown over your mouth to stop the sound of heavy breathing seeping through the door. They spoke a few whispers, but it was too still to decipher.

Not long after, you heard a knock. You hastily stood back up, turning around to face the door and softly inquired:

“Who is it?”

A stern voice answered: “Ma’am, I’m from across the hall. Would you mind opening the door?”

You hesitated for a second. You heard Captain America. And not just that, you heard Steve. The Steve you had known for so long. Through stories, pictures, and so much more. And now he was here. In your building.

Knocking on your door.

In that moment you knew your only choice was to answer. He was a good man. He wouldn’t do anything to harm you. So you unlocked the door and put on your bravest face.

“What seems to be the problem?” you mustered up.

“I wanted to introduce myself. I’m Steve.” A handsome, kind face looked down at you. “I’ll be living here for a while and I wanted you to know that if you heard anything, you shouldn’t worry about it. We’re moving things around a lot and me being a total klutz doesn’t help.” He lifted his eyebrows as to let you know there really wasn’t anything troubling about this, but you saw right through him as soon as he slipped up.

And maybe because you were just spying on them.

“We?” you asked suggestively, slightly squinting your eyes.

“Uhm, Did I say we?” He nonchalantly asked but tried to save this conversation. “I mean, yes! We. My friend and I. Why, did you see him?”

As calmly as he tried to ask this, you were one step ahead of him. “Look Steve; yes, I saw your friend, there’s no need to worry. I don’t know what you guys are doing, but it is none of my business. I sure you wouldn’t do anything illegal. I know you.”

He looked puzzled, not knowing where you were heading with this.

“How do you mean, you know me?”

“First of all, you’re Captain America? Like one of the most well-known heroes on this planet.” You stated.

“Second, I know you as Steve Rogers, the little guy my grandmother used to have a crush on,” you explained to him, eyeing his response. “but you probably know her better as Sally.”

As soon her name left your lips, his eyes went wide with recognition, a smile appearing on his face.

“Sally…” he said, chuckling by himself, reminiscing the old days where, as you know, Steve was so in love with Sally that he brought her a single flower every morning since he was eight years old. With that flower always came a little note which had the loveliest compliments written on them. He wouldn’t talk to her himself, since he was too shy and thought she would never go for him, but how wrong he was. One day, when they were both fourteen, she was waiting for him to leave the flower of that day, a beautiful bright red rose, on her porch. As soon as he laid it down, she yanked the door open and asked;

“What the hell do you think you’re doing leaving me a pretty flower every day and not talking to me? Are those the manners your mommy taught you? Because they’re poorly.”

Since then, the two were inseparable. They would do literally anything together; going to the movies, playing outside, going to the market,… Sometimes Bucky would come with, but it was mostly them two as an amazing duo of friends who felt more for each other, not realizing it.

Until their first kiss at 15. The friendship turned in to so much more, and they were very much in love.

But when Steve’s mother died, his dad thought it was best to move to the other side of Brooklyn. Steve barely had any money to find his way back to his dame and even though Sally had quite a mouth on her, she couldn’t defy her parents, who wanted another man for her. A stronger, more suitable man who could protect her now that the war was in sight.

They corresponded through a few letters, but after Sally became engaged to another man due to her father, the corresponding stopped.

That was the last they heard from each other.

Even though she learned to love her husband, you grandmother only had one true love: Steve. Your grandfather had died a long time ago before you even knew what death was. So since then she always told about little Steve, her neighbour. The love of her life. As you were growing up, you stayed over at your grandma’s house at least twice a week. Not a day went by without a story about Steve, their time together or his life as captain America. Because of this, you felt like you knew Captain America. 

Your grandmother was still alive when they pulled him out of the ice. She was glad that his fate wasn’t to die in a rock of ice, but to be a hero in this age where people had a different war to fight now: aliens.

She died shortly after, but not before telling you to always love who you want, not who others want you to love.

A wise lesson you took with you for the rest for your life.

If you would ever love someone.

“So now we’ve established that I definitely know you,” you began as you leaned on your door. “you don’t have to worry. Mima Sal is the one person I have always respected on this planet and since she respected you, your secrets are safe with me.”

“Is she still alive?” Steve blurted out. He looked hopeful into your eyes, searching for any confirmation.

But you shook your head.

“Unfortunately, no. She died shortly after you came out of the ice.” You sighed. She really was your rock, and it was hard to say goodbye, but she had learned you not to weep, but to be happy to have known people in your life. “If you want, you can always come over sometime. I’d love to talk to someone about her who actually knew her as a young girl.” You sombrely smiled at him. He smiled back and mouthed a silent thank you while you both kept standing there, looking at each other. It was as if someone jolted him back to reality as he suddenly talked.

“Right! So, what’s your name then?” the superhero inquired.

“it’s y/n. y/n y/l/n.” you happily replied to him. “How funny we met! I’d never thought to have the honour.”

He chuckled. “The pleasure is all mine, y/n. Happy to meet you, you’ll be hearing a lot from me! Although I won’t be living here for most of the time.” he confessed to you.

“Oh? The who is? Your buddy?” you figured Steve just helped him settle in.

“Yes, he’ll be staying here for a while. He’s a bit shy, but he is also a big sweetheart.” Steve whispered the last part to you.

“Well, I’m off then. If you hear anything loud, don’t panic and, like, call the police? Would be pretty awkward, right?” he smiled slyly. “Goodbye.”

He turned himself around and was already stalking his way back to his apartment when you halted him with a loud “Wait!”

Steve’s head turned around slightly, his ears perking up at what you would say. “Yes?”

“What’s his name? Your buddy, I mean.”

He smirked as he answered you;

“James. His name is James.”

As you closed your door you stared down your hall, not really there until Nancy jumped up and down at your shins. You reached down to pick her up and take her with you on your sofa. You absentmindedly stroked her back as she cuddled against you, still thinking about what happened.

Not only had you met Captain America; he was also as sweet and caring as your grandmother made him out to be. Though he was not the one you had the most questions about.

Why didn’t James come and talk to you? He would be your neighbour after all. Why were they being so secretive?

You decided to just go back to sleep and try to forget about all the questions those two were raising. As Nancy was fast asleep, you took her with you to your bed, tucking yourself in until your entire body and Nancy’s was covered by your blanket. You let your eyes rest to let sleep take over your senses.

But sleep never came.

Read Chapter 3 Here!

Feedback is always appreciated xoxo

#midnight train #bucky x reader #james buchanan barnes #Bucky Barnes #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky imagine #steve rogers #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #they took the midnight train going anywhere #james x reader #james barnes #james bucky barnes

[lifeisabeautyx]

Bad boy.

Well.. here’s another story for ya..

I met this guy through Tinder. From the second we chatted I had this feeling he wasn’t something I was looking for. The way he’d be talking was just not on my level and I felt like he was just a little too childish. I kept talking to him anyway and later on he started to intriguig me.. There was something about him.

He then started telling me some heavy things he went through and some pretty heavy stuff he did as a teenager. He told me he was a drugdealer at the age of 16 and walked around with like 40k while being in school. He told me that his very best friend got shot because of a deal gone wrong and he felt responsible for it because it was his deal and he actually had to be there. He told me he had to carry his best friends body in to the car and take it to his family’s house. He said he still lies awake at night thinking about it. After that he got out of that world and he changed his life around for the better. The way he opened up to me felt so special..

Since that moment we bonded and we just really connected. Some time later we had our first date. He picked me up and we went to a café. At first we were sitting outside but then there was this huuuuge rainstorm right above us and we had to run inside. We had just sooo much fun and we’d laugh our asses off. My hayfever was getting out of hand and my eyeliner was allll smudged out on my eyes. I had no idea how long he let me walk around like that but when I had a quick glance in my phone I called him out for not telling me haha. We honestly had so much fun but at the same time I was hella insecure about if he felt the same way towards me.. A couple hours later he took me home and chatted some more in his car. When he dropped me off, he walked out of his car and walked up to me and gave me a big hug. It just felt sooo good and thought it was such a sweet gesture. He then drove off and a few minutes later I got a Snapchat saying “had such a nice day❤️”. My heart melted.. he felt the same way.

About two days later he asked me what my thoughts were about the date and if he was what i expected. I told him he was exactly how I expected him to be and I had a really good time with him. I reversed the question on him and he told me I was even better than he expected and he said “have you seen yourself? 😍😍” and again my heart melted.

Our second date was a pretty serious one haha. We went to a zoo. So he came to pick me up again and again we had just so much fun. He was so outspoken and didn’t care about what people would hear or what they would think of him. And i’m basicly the complete opposite. In that way we just really completed eachother cause we learned from eachother. We went through the whole park and just enjoyed ourselves. At the end of the day he dropped me off and again he got out of his car again, coming towards me. He gave me a reaaally big hug. The one that you walk a little, so big. And just stared at each other and there was just this thing.. there wasn’t a kiss or anything but there was just this magical thing at the moment we stared in each others eyes. It felt good.

Our third date we went to see a movie that I picked out and he would pick a restaurant to eat at afterwards. He came to pick me up again and went the cinema. We then drove about 45 minutes to the place he made reservations for. A freakin’ sushi restaurant (fucking amazing right!! 🥰) and had dinner. After we had dinner we walked to the car and he told me he wanted to buy a new car and we wanted to show me a picture of it. As he showed me the picture, a notification from a dating app showed saying “you got a new message from Ilke”. He swiped it away reaaal quick but I already saw that ofcourse. I decided not to mention it because it was not like we were official or anything. The ride home was just a little awkward because I didn’t mention it and he was just a little quiet. When we were at my house he again got out of his car and walked up to me to give me a hug. We then looked each other in the eye and we kissed. A pretty long kiss right in front of my neighbours houses haha.

The next date we decided to take a walk in the woods. We had some serious talks while walking and I’d say we had fun. We then went to a cafe afterwards and drank some alcohol and went home. He dropped me off and talked some more and he gave me a hug. No kiss or anything and it felt just a little off.

After that it went just a little downhill. The vibe was not the same and I just felt that he changed in his way of communicating towards me. His whole attitude changed overnight and he would react so cold sometimes what made me a little insecure. Because my car broke down I was looking for a new one. I got myself a new car and was just really excited so he was one of the first people I told the good news to and he was so mean. He told me it was ugly and that grandma’s drive these type of cars. I decided not to make a comment about it and let it be.

A few days later I posted a photo on my Facebook with the car and he commented something so mean. He said “what should I see here? I see a girl and a piece of crap thing that’s ready for the junkyard” I was just soooo fucking pissed and texted him saying he doesn’t have to be that shitty and we had a fight over text after that and he told me he didn’t have time for this and he just waisted his time with me anyway. That was the last conversation we had.

He still checks up on my socials now and then even though he deleted me on everything. He got himself a girlfriend pretty quick after that though. I felt like such a fool. I really thought there was something between us and then he pulled this on me. Even my friends thought it was getting pretty serious and started liking the thought of him.

Anyway.. that’s the story of bad boy ⚡️

[smutmylifeup]

Out Of The Office Drama: Not A Little Boy Anymore.

This chapter takes place before @whatdoyouexpectthistime‘s latest chapter. Which you can find here. 

Rose sat impatiently in her studio. It was half past twelve and Ryosuke would be coming over in about half an hour.

She was really grateful despite the beers that piled up at Miho’s sleepover the night before hadn’t left her with a hangover. This day wouldn’t be nearly as enjoyable if she had to contend with a headache.

She’d tidied up as much as she could in her studio – canvas’s, paints and brushes all pushed to one side. Her futon bare for them to use as seating.

Everything was clean enough for when he arrived.

Although, she wasn’t entirely sure why it mattered what state he saw her place in. After all, he saw how messy her room was when he was a kid.

With one glance over her appearance in the mirror, she began to prepare bowls of snacks. After all knowing them they’d end up playing for hours due to their competitiveness. And she’d be an awful hostess if she didn’t feed her guest.

But she still wasn’t sure why she was so giddy and going to efforts she didn’t normally make for anyone, for Ryosuke.

Ding-dong.

Rose glanced at her watch and then looked up. 12:42, he was early. With a quick glance at her appearance in her wall mirror, Rose scuttled and buzzed him up without checking it was him.

She shifted on her feet in front of the door and watched it open like it was slow motion.

“Aw, look at you being a good Pommy and waiting by the door for your master.”

The disappointment on her face was evident. And Minato scowled in response.

“Alright, I get it. The pommy jokes are getting old.”

Rose sighed, letting the disappointment wash out of her system and going with that she was actually annoyed with his dog related jokes.

“Thought you were coming over tomorrow?”

Rose queried, walking back to continue what she was doing. Minato followed her.

“I am, I just couldn’t find my cufflink. This is the only place it could be, since you didn’t allow me to get changed from work before I came here.”

Rose didn’t need to see it to know he was smirking.

After their first roll in the hay, they’d met several times after for no strings attached fun. He was the opposite of Kyobashi and it was a nice change of pace. But she wasn’t sure she liked this impromptu visit. He could of text her in advance.  

“I tidied earlier. If it’s here, it’ll be in that bowl by the futon.”

Rose said motioning with her chin to the ‘living’ area but not making any attempt to find it for him. While they were only fuck buddies, they had a connection – of twisted and lonely hearts, and they trusted each other more than they’d probably care to admit but they both knew it since being ‘fuck buddies’ meant trusting another person.

Minato followed Rose’s instruction and searched in the little bowl of odd titbits she’d find on her floor when she’d actually decide to clean.

“Since when did you tidy?”

Minato called to her.

“I do tidy from time to time. I’m just too busy to do it every day.”

Minato found his cufflink the bowl and then returned to Rose.

“Well whatever. Fancy messing it up again before I head back to the office?”

Minato wrapped his arms around Rose from behind and kissed her neck. And while Rose was never one to turn down an offer of getting her fill of the good stuff. And Minato knew how to fill her with the good stuff.

She wasn’t after that today and it was the furthest thing from her mind, for once.

“Tempting, but I have a friend coming over in about,” Rose checked her watch. “Shit, any moment now.”

Rose wiggled out of Minato’s hold and put the bowls of snacks on the table by the futon.

“You have friends?” Minato said.

“Har Har. Yes I have friends.”

After placing the bowls down, Rose spun around directly into Minato. She looked up at him and he was slightly pouting and that made her chuckle.

“Not the kind of friends we are, you don’t have to get jealous.”

Rose tiptoed and placed a kiss on his cheek as if to appease his possessive side. Not that she had to explain or apologise for anything. They were only fuck buddies after all.

“I’m not, I’m just surprised a Pommy like you has friends.”

Looks like the kiss didn’t appease much because he was still grumpy. And Rose rolled her eyes in response and ushered him to the door.

“You can have me all you want tomorrow.”

“Ugh, you are making me not want to leave.”

Minato responded and dug his heels in as he reached the door.

“You’re coming tomorrow?” Rose asked double checking that just in case he left more hickeys on her she could prepare to hide them from Miho in advance.

“We both will be.”

Minato smirked before planting a quick kiss on Rose’s lips as if to seal his promise and he left as quickly as he showed up.

Rose sighed and was about the shut the door when a familiar and timid copper haired man entered her field of vision.

Man.

It was weird to call him that, but he definitely was not a boy anymore.

“Ryo!” Rose exclaimed.

Her almost exasperated expression quickly turning into one of delight and opening the door as wide as possible to invite him in.

Ryosuke was almost sheepish as he entered Rose’s place. Tiptoeing his way in and looking around like a nervous little puppy.

“Something up?”

Rose asked when his usual happy smile didn’t light up his face when she greeted him.

“Oh! Um, your neighbour was leaving as I arrived and let me up, so I thought I’d surprise you. But, I um, I, I saw that guy leave and thought maybe you were busy.”

He sounded awfully sad. And that made Rose’s heart sting a little.

“Is he your boyfriend?”

Ryo spat out, his eyes looking everywhere but Rose’s as if he didn’t want to hear the answer.

“Er, he’s not.”

Rose said, cocking her own head trying to read the sudden almost shoujo manga style reactions.

“He-He isn’t?”

Ryosuke’s eyes flew open and his mouth hung open a little as he stared at Rose.

“No. The only guy I stand for longer than five minutes is you.”

Rose said matter of factly. And to her answer, Ryosuke blushed about fifty shades of red but he giggled shyly.

“Don’t stand there, come in.” Rose said.

Ryosuke followed, his eyes wide and childlike as he looked around her studio. She gave him a short tour, since there wasn’t much to show him. He sat on Rose’s futon but only after she instructed him to. And Rose sat beside him.    

“I always loved your art. But you’ve gotten so much better. Even better than Mr. Kisaki!”

Ryosuke said proudly as he looked over at the array of canvases leaned up against the wall to the side of him.

“Thanks, I might tell him you said that.”

Rose smirked and waited for-

“No! Please don’t, he’ll make my life a living hell. Even Mr. Oh wouldn’t be able to protect me from his teasing!”

Rose laughed, just as expected. He hadn’t changed a single bit.

“Don’t worry, if he does anything to you, I’ll kick his ass.”

Rose ruffled Ryosuke’s hair but her touch lingered a bit longer than a friendly touch. His hair was so soft, he’d obviously taken good care of it over the years.

“No! I’m not a little boy anymore, I can fight my own battles!”

Ryosuke almost shouted and Rose let her hand naturally fall away from his head. She was a little taken aback by his tone but he was right, she couldn’t keep treating him like the child he used to be.

“Okay, sorry,” Rose said, giving a little chuckle. “You’re important to me though, I can’t help wanting to protect you. Especially since I’ve finally found you again.”

Rose shifted her position on the sofa and leant her head on his shoulder. Why was she being so affectionate? It was like she couldn’t handle not touching him in some way.

She couldn’t see his face but she felt his body tense and relax after a few deep breaths.

“F-Finally?”

Ryosuke said his voice a little flustered.

“Mm, after we moved away – probably about three or fourth months later I ran away from home.”

Rose hadn’t told this story to anyone but Ryosuke needed to hear it. After all he needed to know that she never forgot about him.

“Right back to my old house. It was a bitch of a bus journey and I used all of my allowance to get back to there. When I got to your house I knocked on the door and a strange old lady answered.”

Rose closed her eyes. This memory was still so vivid, like it happened yesterday.

“I thought maybe she was your grandma, so I asked if you were home but she had no idea who you were and shut the door on me. I remember being really pissed off and knocked again but she shouted for me to go away through the door.”

Ryosuke shifted next to her but Rose continued.

“So I went to your neighbour on the other side. And she told me that you didn’t live there anymore and I should go home. I didn’t understand, I ended up sitting outside your house for nearly three hours waiting for you before my parents showed up and took me home. They helped me in my search for you, but we couldn’t find anything. You were gone without a trace.”

Rose paused, it sounded like she gave up.

“But something in my heart told me I’d find you and I never gave up hope. We always said we were connected by the red string of fate.”

She never gave up.  

“I’m sorry you had to go through all that.”

Rose lifted her head. That was so like him to apologise for something that wasn’t even his fault.

“I guess you never found out what happened?”

There was a sadness in his eyes that made Rose gulp as she waited for him to continue.

“I still don’t know the full details but this is what I found out when I got older. One night, probably about a month after you moved. My, my parents were on their way home from work and they were ambushed by a group of men who intended to rob them using a knife as a threat. My dad tried to protect my mum and he ended up getting stabbed. And since my mum was a witness, they stabbed her too.”

Rose’s heart shattered into a million pieces. She knew his parents well, they were wonderful people. So devoted to each other and their son.

Before she knew what she was doing, she’d thrown herself into his lap and was hugging him as tightly as she could without restricting his breathing.

“I, I had no idea,” Rose didn’t even know it, but she was crying and her words were coming out in muffled sobs against his shoulder. “I’m so sorry.”

“F-for someone who didn’t like hugs, you’re sure hugging me a lot!”

Ryosuke chuckled through his own sobs, his own arms rapping around her without hesitation. Rose had no idea what to say, she’d never dealt with death before. Nor someone dealing with a loss so great. He must have been hurt so much and she wasn’t there to protect him in the most vulnerable moments of his life.

She knew it wasn’t anyone’s fault except the bastards who took two innocent lives. And ruined a child’s life in the process.

“Are-are they?”

Rose said. Already knowing the answer.

“Yeah, they both died at the scene. The paramedics had no chance of saving them.”

It scared her how cold his voice sounded – so unfamiliar, but she couldn’t imagine it sounding any other way. She hugged him tighter his own hold on her tightening too.

He nudged her head out of his shoulder so he could look at her.

“Don’t be sad for me, my parents wouldn’t want that.”

He smiled, with tears streaming down his face. And it was genuine - Rose knew the difference between his fake and genuine smile after all.

“They taught me a lot and I was grateful for how much the loved and cherished me despite our circumstance. After their deaths, I was put in an orphanage since I had no living blood relatives. And I was on the streets a lot and I didn’t go to school much. I’d lost my best friend and parents – I was in such a dark place and some days I didn’t care whether I lived or died. And that’s how I met Mr. Oh he saved me from a gang of men who tried to beat me up.”

He smiled fondly at that memory.

“He was so strong and fierce. He took them all on by himself and only ended up with a cut on his lip.”

Rose would forever be indebted to Mr. Oh.

“He actually reminded me of you,” He said and Rose arched and eyebrow. “No, I didn’t mean I thought of you as a man!”

He quickly defended himself, although Rose didn’t think that at all.

“He had that sense of justice in his eyes and the compassion and warmth that was always around you.”

Rose smiled sadly.

“He took me in and I’ve been with him ever since!”

He beamed, despite what had happened to him. He still remained innocent, grateful and happy.

“He sounds like a good man.”

“He is! He’s the greatest. I hope you can get to know him like I do. Most people don’t look past his scary face.”

Ryosuke’s brow furrowed.

“I’d like that. You’ll have to introduce us properly next time, so I can thank him.”

Rose was torn in half but she took the lead from Ryosuke’s acceptance of what happened.

“I will! You’d really like him, Akane. And I know he’d like you too! I mean he was pretty impressed how you floored Mr. Kisaki. He told Mr Baba and Mr Ichinomiya about it, they teased Mr. Kisaki mercilessly. I tried so hard not to laugh. He was already soooo angry with me.”

Ryosuke chuckled softly, the tears and heartache drifting away into the past to the sound of his laughter.

“It wasn’t hard.”

Rose shrugged as she wiggled into a more comfortable position in his lap. She rested her head against his shoulder and they talked about the years they’d missed out on. Reminisced about old times and Rose teased him like crazy, enjoying his shrill cries of denial and embarrassment.

“So, do you have a girlfriend?”

Rose asked abruptly. And it dawned on her if he did, she probably shouldn’t be sitting in his lap like this but there were no ‘sexual’ undertones so it was okay, right?

“What?! Why do you ask that?”

He screeched in her ear.

“Why not?”

Ryosuke fidgeted under Rose and she chuckled at his reaction. Still so innocent, so the answer was probably-

“I, I don’t. I’ve never had a, a girlfriend.”

His words were quiet and if Rose wasn’t resting her head so close to his mouth she wouldn’t have heard him.

For some reason, that made her a little bit happy.

Perhaps because she wasn’t ready to share him since they’d just been reunited. Yeah that was it.

“Do-Do you have a boyfriend?”

Ryosuke blurted out.

“I don’t. Didn’t I tell you that earlier?”

“N-No! You just said that guy wasn’t your boyfriend! Who was he anyway? Ah! You don’t need to tell me if you don’t want to!”

Ryosuke asked and flustered. Rose laughed. He still asked so many questions. But her brow quickly furrowed as she tried to find a way to describe this without making him think any less of her.

“A business associate.”

That wasn’t a lie really, after all she met him through MJS.

“What kind of business are you working in?”

Now that was a harder question. She didn’t want to lie to him but she also wasn’t allowed to divulge the protocols and confidentiality agreements that she signed when she joined MJS not matter how much she trusted him.

Best to be ‘vague’.

“Matchmaking and wedding planning agency.”

Ryosuke laughed and Rose lifted her head to look at him.

“What’s so funny?”

“You! I can’t picture you helping people fall in love. You hate people.”

Rose wanted to tell him off but the sound of his laughter was too adorable to be mad at.

“I guess, but I don’t have to deal with too many people. And the people I work with are great. The women I was with at the art gallery works there – her name is Jazz and she’s as feisty as they come. I’ll have to take you to meet Miho, although she’d tease you senseless.”

Rose said thinking that maybe her boss would have a field day with how puppy-like Ryosuke was.

“Wh-What?!”

He exclaimed but Rose continued.

“You’d like H. She’s real sweet and friendly.”

Ryosuke watched Rose smile and smiled along with her. He never imagined the loner she used to be would grow up to be a little social butterfly.

“Maybe I can bring you by the office sometime. I’ll ask Miho when I’m next there.”

Rose said to herself more than Ryosuke. It was only the sound of him yawning that drew her attention away from her plans of her childhood friend meeting her work family.

She lifted her watch towards her eyes and notice the time 7:29pm.

Shit. They’d been talking for nearly eight hours. It was amazing how much catching up they had done and there was still so much more they hadn’t said.

“Are you tired?”

Ryosuke shook his head but yawned again. Much like a child trying to stay awake past their curfew.

“Well you gave yourself away there,” Rose sighed and pushed herself up ready to get a blanket so he could nap. “Do you want to take a nap?”

Rose was pulled back into his chest in his sleepy state.

“Nooo! Don’t move, you’re warm!”

His hold on her grew tighter as he wailed his displeasure of Rose trying to move.

“You’ll get neck ache if you sleep like that.”

Rose chuckled, she couldn’t help it. He was so cute.

“Shhh. Sleeping.”

He nuzzled his face against her hair and then his movements stilled and his breathing got heavier.

“Fall asleep really fast still? Jeez.”

While Rose was complaining, she didn’t mean a single word of it. She was just happy to be sitting here with him. She took a deep breath through her nose and caught a wiff of his cologne. It was manly, oaky with a twist of something fruity. Nothing like the sweet and candy like smell she remembered him smelling of as a child.

Rose smiled at the memory as she closed her eyes and nuzzled into his arms.

She always wanted to be the one to protect him, even if he grew bigger and stronger than her – which he had. The tense of his biceps against her back were a clear indicator despite his gentle touch. However, sitting in his arms like this, she felt so safe, secure and protected.

She didn’t see him as a little boy anymore.

That was her last thought as she began to fall asleep.

She awoke to the sound of cheerful humming. The desire to roll over and get away from the noise since she was so cosy and warm was restricted by a firm hold.

Lazily, her eyes opened. The darkness that was around told her that is was the middle of the night and the desire to return to sleep grew greater. However the humming reverberated against the chest she was snuggled against and made it difficult for sleep to come to her again.

“Why are you so happy?”

Rose said, her voice coming out as dull and as sleepy as she felt.

“Wah! You’re awake?!”

Ryosuke shouted in response, his body becoming stiff and less comfortable.

“Hard not to be when you’re humming in my ear. And don’t answer my question with a question.”

While her words were lacklustre, she smiled at his reaction.

“I’m sorry, I, I didn’t mean to wake you. Ah, I just woke up and you, you were still sleeping in my arms and I didn’t want to wake you. You looked so peaceful and cute – Ah I didn’t mean cute.”

Rose chuckled as he continued to fumble over his own words.

“So I’m not cute?”

Rose lifted her head enough to look at his face and thanks to the city lights sparkling through her window, she could see the blush all over his cheeks. And his eyes widened after Rose asked her oh so innocent question.

“Um, no! I mean yes, you are cute. But Ah.”

Rose leant her head back against his shoulder and sighed contently. One of her favourite past times was teasing this little bundle of cuteness but that wasn’t why she was happy. No one had ever called her cute before and it made her happy – not that she’d tell anyone that. Miho would have a riot teasing the ever stone faced Rose about being ‘cute’.

She could feel him fidgeting under her and decided while she was probably insanely comfortable and could stay in this position forever, he probably had pins and needles in every part of his body.

Getting up and out of his lap she stood and stretched. Her relaxed muscles reluctantly coming back to life.

“Are, are you mad?”

Ryosuke stuttered from his sitting position. And Rose turned towards him mid-stretch. Her heart swelled when she caught a glimpse of his crestfallen face.

“No.”

She said genuinely and thankfully Ryosuke beamed back at her. Only to be interrupted by the alien gurgling in her belly.

“We should probably eat though.” Rose chuckled.

The snacks she had prepared earlier weren’t going to sufficient enough to sustain both of them until breakfast. So she whipped up two simple rice dishes she’d learnt to make as a kid when her parents weren’t around.

“I should probably get going soon.”

Ryosuke said scratching the back of his neck like he didn’t really want to leave.

Rose scowled and looked at her watch. It was just after midnight and with all the recent going on’s at MJS, the idea of him not staying the night hadn’t entered her head.

“No.”

She said simply, clearing away the dinner plates.

“No?”

Ryosuke repeated.

Rose wasn’t facing him and she was glad – she was sure the worry on her face was probably evident. But she couldn’t tell him about the dangers her job had put on one of her co-workers recently. That was a breach not only of the MJS protocol but Police protocol too.

She wasn’t worried for herself, she didn’t want anything to happen to him. No matter how much he’d grown up, how much stronger he had gotten, he was still so very precious to her. No one at this point knew what this weird creeper wanted or was after. He had only targeted Miho so far but that didn’t mean he wasn’t watching all of them. And if she was the reason for him getting in danger – she would never be able to forgive herself.

But it wasn’t just that. She didn’t want him to leave, not just because of the creeper.

“We haven’t played a single game of Mario Kart.”

She shrugged, hoping her voice hid the truth from him.

“You’re right! I haven’t shown you just how good I’ve gotten!”

Rose sighed in relief.

“Mhm, I wanna see this so called improvement.”

Rose had put the dishes on the counter and returned to Ryosuke who was still sat at the small dining table. She took his hand without a second thought and let their hands mould into one before pulling him back towards the sofa.

It was simple and innocent but it was something Rose wouldn’t dream of doing with anyone other than him. It made her heart palpitate and made her skin tingle to touch him. What that meant, Rose sure as hell wouldn’t be able to explain.

As experienced and attune to people and their emotions and feelings – she could not understand her own. Instead she chose to ignore them for the moment. So much had gone on recently – she’d attribute it to that. Even if it didn’t make sense.

For now it seemed easier to brush off the complexity of the emotions she felt and focus on the positives. She was just pleased to be sitting next to Ryosuke and still whooping his ass at Mario Kart until the early hours of the morning. Until they both fell asleep – laying down side by side this time, curled up in each other’s arms. Nothing like how they’d fall asleep next to each other when they were kids.  

MJS - @whatdoyouexpectthistime @smile-smile-ichthys @hifftn @nitelotus

#voltage fanfic #mjs matchmaking #mjs #mjs matchmaking and wedding planning agency #mjs matchmaking service #kbtbb inui #ryosuke inui #kissed by the baddest bidder #minato okouchi #otbs minato #kbtbb #otbs

[oversizedpencil-blog]

Pitch bible evaluation

Research

after receiving the task brief, I started researching on pitch bibles and specifically ones for animation films and shows, I watched a video lecture titled “How to Create a Pitch Bible“by heather Kenyon, and looked at examples of pitch bibles for existing successful shows, I made a note of the things that were included in them, the length of the bible, style and content.

Inspiration

I was inspired by different genres of animation and film but I tend to lean to realistic stories and slice of life genres, therefore I looked at some animations to help me come up with an idea for a story. Films included, From Up on Poppy Hill (2011 film), Only Yesterday (1991 film) , Le chat du rabbin (2011), and other stories and art work. These films have many things in common, including the subtlety of the story, genre and type of characters, yet they all include a hint of adventure, and goal.

I started gathering images and artwork that inspired me, including photos of the place, the Casbah in Algiers, photos of people who live there, to help me illustrate characters that fit in the environment and represent reality. I made a mood board of these images which I thought could help me with putting all the film ideas together.

 Idea

Coming up with a story idea was a difficult part but thankfully I had a few film ideas I jotted down previously so it wasn’t such a bad start. After establishing the kind of characters, story, and movie genre that appealed to me, I decided that I wanted my film to have a female lead character; I also wanted to include other strong female side characters that leave an impression. In terms of story, a warm story that transforms the protagonist into a better person by the end, is what I wanted to go for, also a warm and colourful setting, despite the struggles and tragedy in the story, I wanted it to leave a positive message and impression on the audience therefore The theme I wanted to go for is a family theme, a father and daughter relationship, a slice of life story.

In order to show the Casbah from the point of view of someone who is discovering it for the first time, I chose a character who moves to the Casbah for the summer, yet they are unhappy to be there. The story revolves around the young girl learning to love the Casbah and its people through living the childhood of her father whom she didn’t know properly. The camera plays an important role in the story as it is what sets the series of events in the story and what links Aya to her father. I think having an object associated with the film or story is important as it sets it apart from other stories or films and helps link the different events and parts of the story together.

The goal of the story was a difficult aspect of the writing process and It took the longest to develop; in fact I was tweaking it until the very last stages and was constantly changing. I chose the conflict to be a man vs self type of conflict, as in the character is fighting to achieve some sort of emotional cause rather than anything physical or an evil outside force interfering. The idea of her trying to connect with her fathers , his past and childhood seemed right and plays a big role in her character development from a moody and irresponsible young girl, to more open and confident about her identity.

 Character design

The characters I decided on for the film were, a young girl (Aya, 14), her grandma (Tata Jamila) , uncle, an old man (Aya’s dad’s childhood friend, Amou Bashir), and maybe another female character, side characters included father and mother, and children in the neighbourhood.

These characters went under a lot of development and changes, for example I intended on having a second female character, a young girl, but towards the end of the process, I decided not to include her as I felt she deserved to be a lead character for a different film. The character of the grandmother was there from the start, as I wanted the young lead character to have a close role model to look up to and ask for advice throughout the film. I also included some neighbourhood kids that are the same age as the lead character; this was to keep the innocent and playful hint to the film, as I didn’t want Aya to be the only child.

The next step was to start sketching out character designs and jotting down story ideas on the go, I found that good ideas came at random moments and not when I sat down and looked for them, therefore I wanted to be ready when I got a new idea. I used photos from my mood board and photographs of people and places in the Casbah to draw inspiration for character design, background design and even story idea, using the locations I saw in the photos. Most of these photos came from own my photography and from the following photography account https://www.flickr.com/groups/casbah_of_algiers/  

 Setting

Deciding on the setting for the story was the easiest part, I have always wanted to write a film and set it in Algiers or Algeria in general, as I feel a connection to the place and think that it is very underrepresented in the media and films. The place fits the story theme and the atmosphere I was going for, as the Casbah is a very family and neighbours orientated place with deep history, I feel it contributes to that atmosphere. I wanted to use bright colours because I think it reflects the theme and style of the film, and for the message to be bubbly and radiate a warm family atmosphere

What would I improve on/change

If I were to do this project again or improve it, I would focus on improving Concept art, for example my painting skills, environment, background  and colour studies to achieve the look I was going for, or commission a real background artist for the job. I would have also spent a longer time on developing the story, as I think it can be improved in more than one way, because at times, I felt that it was a little unclear and didn’t seem to have a clear purpose.

That being said, this project taught me a lot and I helped me improve my story and character development skills in an intensive task that involved using many of the pre-production skills we learned previously and put them to the test.

presenting

I feel that the pitch presentation went well and that it flew nicely overall. Adding an animation that i made previously of the charcater of Aya picking up the camera in the enviornemnt was a good way to show the style of how the animtion, charcater design style and backgrounds would fit together.

I belive I covered all the important points about my film idea and explained them well. on the other hand I could have elaborated on the stories and adventure that happen in the middle of the film, how Aya interacts with the charcters, her relationship with each of them and how she changes throughout the film.

Overall I’m satisfied with the film pitch bible; even though I think there is a big room for improvement. Although I found it very hard to develop the story, I’m satisfied with the end result, and can see myself returning to it later for further development and maybe even production.

[nataliesnews]

Eli, Hanan Schlesinger   Tag maier and breaking the silence 19.11.2017

My friend, Eli,  sent me this. Eli has her own way of handling her diet. She eats her deserts first and then any other food. Rather disconcerting when you go to a restaurant and you sit with you plate of meat and veg and she gets this much smaller plate of  chocolate or  whatever. Evidently the younger generations has been influenced. Calypso is her granddaughter.  “Today, Calypso asked if she could have some chocolate before eating her vegetables. When I asked her in what universe did she live, she answered "in grandma's universe!"

I thought it would make you laugh...”

 I was at another talk by Rabbi Hanan Schlesinger whom I had heard at Women make peace. This time at a private home with a handful of other people. He had brought his neighour, Abu Awad. The former is from Alon Morei against the building of which I  demonstrated against many years ago….not  that that helped…. and Abu Awad is from Beit Umar, a Palestinian village which you pass on the way to Hebron. The owner of the house had also invited his neighbor. They described their meeting. The flat is near a Palestinian area and the one night the neighbor said he was accosted by his Jewish neighbor who asked if he were an Arab which gave him a bit of a fright. But then it turned out that David was religious  and that  he was looking for a Shabbas Goy. ( A non Jew  who could put on his electric switch which had fallen and which being Shabbat none of the observant family could do.)The  Palestinian gentleman described how he had come to find a roomful of Jews sitting in total darkness. Since when the families are on visiting terms.

 Schlesinger is very well meaning and, I believe,  sincere  but very naïve to put it mildly and I told him I believed that he had not  realized that he had neighbours…..are the Palestinians so transparent then?   ….but   that he had not heard the word occupation I find hard to believe.. I also asked where they thought that they were going with their organization which is called Shorashiem but the nearest I got to an answer is that they are talking together. Abu Awad lost a brother which of course is a euphemism, killed by israeli forces and is a member of the Bereaved families  association and he described how he came to choose the way of non-violence. I would really like to be able to sit down with each privately. When in a group the conversation goes in all  different ways and so many people want to ask that it is difficult.

 I also went to an evening of Tag Maier , “ a leading Israeli moderate Orthodox organization, formed a coalition of like-minded religious and secular organizations in order to address the rising incidence of violence and incitement by Jewish religious extremists against Muslims and Christians. Today the coalition, known as Tag Meir, has grown from 15 to over 50 organizations united in the fight against extremist right-wing ideology within Jewish circles—racism, xenophobia and religious hatred—and in particular against heinous violent, sometimes deadly, acts of terrorism known as “Price Tag” (Tag Mechir)”   

 But  there were only about 30 people there, half  of them Arabs from the Galilee. Very disappointing. As we say we are always speaking to those who do not need to be  convinced. But Carmi Gilon spoke to us and when he heard my accent he said that his grandfather had come from South Africa. He said he is not optimistic in any way but that at least gave out some light. Maybe we do but the candle light is flickering.

My SA passport has arrived…..took 6 months….can you believe it. I asked the woman if they realized that we were in the 21st century…or is it  the 22nd….at my age what difference does it make. I will go Monday to pick it  up in Tel Aviv.

 There is a big furor here about Breaking the Silence. One of the soldiers has been accused of giving a lying testimony. He described how he beat up an Arab. The soldiers with him at the time and the commander say no such thing happened. Not surprising. I, as I have written before, have myself seen how soldiers can deny committing an action. I had the personal experience. But the key point that is made is that  the Palestinian himself has denied that this took place. Very easy also here to see how threats could have brought him to deny the attack. After all that is the way that the army enlists collaboration  either by the stick or the carrot.  But can anyone explain to me  why a soldier would make such a statement knowing that there were those around him could accuse him of lying? It is so obvious that this is an effort to blacken  the organization. Just  as some of the right are using the terrorist attack at Har Arad to discredit Machsom watch.

 And today I am going to the Jordan valley for yet another  demonstration which to me is becoming more and more futile. But  the way the country is going I may soon be looking back longingly on the days when we could still demonstrate. 300 familie are going to be driven from their homes …and they so kindly received the notification by an order placed on a stone on paths leading to their homes. I am still trying to think of the word to describe this…arrogance, lack of respect, ? Thanks google…contempt.  I know that  the claim is that many of them are late comers to the area  and that they are  invaders….but the illegal outposts are not?

  w�_�"a

#Eli Hanan Schlesinger Tag maier and breaking the silence 19.11.2017