#Genuinely happy but then their parent corrected them and i was like damn... He had it man he knew what was up | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

scattered-winter · 1 year

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AAAAA i did forget to say that i love my own tag!! i do love to be qpr anon 😭 and i enjoyed it sm to read your thoughts on the points i sent you, i can only give back a *strongly agree* for everything you said, it's like you took my brain and wrote your reply while using it 😂😂 did not expect my opinions to be received that well, i tried to go for admitting the hard stuff because that is usually more fun, so i hope it's okay if i bounce off more ideas based on your reply!! ♥

firstly...... HELL YES join the bucktalia train with me, the finale really made me love them a lot, and i hope we will see much more of them in s7! i have more thoughts on them specifically but i'll stick to the og numbering so it's easier to follow 😂 (this feels lowkey like school, i am so sorry LMAO)

1.) i totally get that the donor storyline squicked you! i was very worried about buck not being able to move on from the baby, with him buying that firefighter-like baby onesie and all... but WOW his maturity? that he helped them simply "because he could"? buck is just such a good person, i think we were shown again just how much he is willing to do to help others and how his help is unconditional as well 😭😭 it melted my whole heart. the callback to buck's wish to be loved by his parents unconditionally... how he called himself "defective" but called his own son "perfect"... just. wow. WOW. the fact alone that he helped during the birth of his own biological child, and he was so confident while doing so!! a masterpiece. i need fics with delivery nurse AU for buck ♥♥♥

2.) jjjjjjooooooooin the bucktalia train 😂😂 no jk no pressure ofc! but but but, i just really like natalia, and how they did things with the little time they had left this season! the couch stood for buck's agency and his peace with himself – he knows who he is, he knows he cannot force anyone to stay in his life if they do not fully accept him or fit his own values (abby, taylor), he knows that his partner must understand and accept his type of lifestyle and the risks related to it (ali), he knows that he won't be happy by living somebody else's version of a good life (i.e., having somebody else's couch instead of his own, which goes for abby, ali, and taylor). and just!!!! buck slowly learning that he is lovable the way he is and that he would rather be alone than settle for somebody who does not love all of him!!!!! it's so important to me. and i do not understand why everyone is saying he regressed! 😭😭 where?!? with every relationship and new experience, buck is learning a lil bit more about himself and his worth imo. it does not have to be linear, and sometimes it's babysteps instead of big jumps, but that's how development works. real humans do not just snap with their fingers and unlearn all their maladaptive behaviors and coping mechanisms either. give buck time ffs @ the fandom!!

2.1.) i am drinking the hot tea that you just served me, bestie. sip sip sip, you are so correct about everything re the buddie agenda and hivemind!! it's crazy to me because i genuinely feel like they almost gaslight themselves and everybody else with what they do?!?! even scenes that are unrelated to buddie are *used* for buddie purposes (e.g. the scene with chim and his dad, about biological fathers), and it's so damn frustrating to me because the facts get twisted and twisted and twisted 😭 like NO!! these scenes weren't even about buddie!!! or worse, they twist everything around to make canon love interests look like the devil when they are often more innocent than buck and eddie themselves (let's not act as if these two are unfailing gentlemen who always treat their women right, c'mon now). and then the fandom gets excited because they come up with some new elaborate theory again, and then they genuinely expect buddie to become canon every single episode. and are disappointed and angry when they aren't. buddie has much bigger problems than that when in 6 veeery long seasons, there was not a single hint dropped that buck or eddie are attracted to men even thought they had plenty of opportunity to do so fjsdfkdshk;; the fun time with headcanons and theories has ended like 3 seasons ago because of the buddie fandom taking over everything... just, ugh.

3.) i could not have said it better. not adding any comment, you spilled the truth.

4.) YES AAAAAA god i can't, i am full of emotions for bucktalia. and yes, she did help deliver the baby in the sense that she got utensils for buck to deliver it, and she also dabbed kameron's forehead with a wet towel etc!! 😭♥ especially the fact that natalia is a death doula has me sooo intrigued. people who work in such a field just have a completely different relation to death, and with grief, and with life (she called herself an "end-of-life doula", which i need everybody to know and think about – how she emphasized the life, not the death)!!! buck's job, his past death, his coma experience, daniel?!? he experienced death himself, he experienced those of others that he tried to save... i just think, in athena's words, maybe natalia is finally the "specific kind of crazy" that can fully accept what buck's lifestyle truly means. because natalia herself has been there to help those that are at the end of their lives – and so has buck. idk idk idk, their professions are different but also so alike! 😭😭

related to that, i LOVED that she wanted to talk to buck about his death experience! there, i said it, and i hate the fandom for twisting it into smth ugly. BUCK was the one joking about his own death, and natalia responded accordingly. it's literally her profession to deal with death, and to accompany people who will die soon on this last journey of their lives. humans have always been interested to know how death feels like, what comes after death... i find her passion 1000% understandable, and tbh? to think that maybe she was looking for an answer about all this, from somebody who was dead before but came back, so that she could be better at helping others?!?!?! i respect and love that idea. what do you think? ♥♥

5.) indeed!! "fandom illiteracy" is my new favorite word, it's so fitting, yes yes yes. and it's ALWAYS just when it's about buddie or a canon love interest that ""threatens"" buddie canonization (as if THAT is what threatens it lol. not the fact that we have yet to see either of them find men attractive?). also omg i originally called eddie an unreliable narrator in my ask but deleted that again bc i didn't wanna come off as too harsh 😂😂😂 and i must add, eddie did not even meet ana at a call! 😂 they met at christopher's school, and he had immediate chemistry with her, so much so that carla immediately side-eyed him for giving her hearteyes. what's that about *magic* and *chemistry* that eddie talked about again?? they reconnected thanks to a call, yes, but it was eddie's choice to ask for a date, and it was eddie who was burdened by past trauma that he had repressed for years, and it was eddie who was not ready for anything serious. ana said "it's your mess now" after he broke up with her in the most ineloquent way possible, after showing that ana was cleaning up his mess in the kitchen. i did not care much about eddieana overall but like... people put all the blame on ana, even for her calling eddie "edmundo", as if eddie is not an adult who can speak and advocate for himself. like, he is just A GUY. maybe the real issue was all his baggage that he hasn't dealt with yet, and not whether or not he met ana on a call. realistically, eddieana was doomed from the start no matter where they met because eddie was simply not ready for anything serious, emotionally and mentally. he would have also not been ready if it was buck, or marisol, or anyone else. that is OKAY. but i NEED the fandom to stop taking everything these characters say as gospel truth, as you fittingly called it. they are fictional, they are tools to tell a story, they are tools to create drama and evoke emotions! and for this, they often talk bullshit to learn a lesson later on. and well, we saw eddie dealing with his trauma finally, and moving forward at his own pace, and being happy to get a date with marisol!

6.) i agree with you on everything here YES. finale gave such great whump, i loved the action and the hurt and the dirty bloody looks and all!! hen wiping away buck's blood????????????? SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP. i also agree that a bit more time for the recovery part would have been nice. then again, they also did not give us much of that when buck's leg was crushed or eddie was shot. the show often skips parts that would be very satisfactory imo lol. but i love good whump and hurt/comfort so maybe that's just me LOL.

share your fic ideas (ONLY if you feel comfortable doing so) and also i am incredibly sorry this got so long. i will now go hide under a blanket and fangirl about bucktalia dfdfgksdlk;

<33!!

for the sake of not repeating myself because we've both said stuff like this in the other post I'm just gonna say a blanket statement for all these and say HARD AGREE <33

HOWEVER i do want to individually touch on natalia because OUGH. I FORGOT SHE REFERRED TO HERSELF LIKE THAT. OUHG <33 I love that so fucking much.

also YEAH. justice for ana and taylor and ali and abby and natalia and every other character who was in proximity with buddie and suffered more than jesus for it

AND FOR FIC IDEAS i really. don't have a LOT of fully formed thoughts but idk. jee and maddie visiting chim in the hospital. buck (no broken ribs) driving eddie home and maybe staying over for a few days to help him out while he healed. athena + bobby being tender. hen + karen being tender. maybe all the hospitalized 118 get together in a single hospital room and plan a breakout. who can say <3 (this is only fic ideas to fit into the episode. however i have. uh. 50+ wips and aus for other things in this fandom. i have what you might call A Problem)

AND I'D LIKE TO ADD A LITTLE DISCLAIMER HERE. BECAUSE I'VE BEEN A HATER FOR THE PAST FEW DAYS BUT I NEED TO SET SOMETHING STRAIGHT. i LOVE buddie. i do. i love their tenderness, and their intimacy, and their friendship, and i love what they have, and i love what they could have. i love slowburns, and i love friends to lovers, and i love coparenting, and i genuinely love looking at them through a romantic lens because it sparks joy !! and i also love looking at them through a qpr lens because it sparks joy !! they spark joy in any capacity !!! my gripes with buddie are at the FANDOM LEVEL, not w the sillies onscreen. its because other characters and relationships are shoved out of the way, or twisted, or put down to prop buddie up, and its because its SO HARD to find meta, fic, or anything else in this fandom that focuses solely on any of the other incredible characters, pairings, or themes in this show because everything's always about You Know Who and You Know Who Else. I know I've been kinda spiteful toward them lately but I just wanna say that it's stemming from frustration of watching characters constantly be demonized/ignored/shoved aside so that Buddie Can Work(tm) as opposed to me actually hating the pairing. ty goodnight <3

#I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT BECAUSE I REALLY DO LOVE BUDDIE BUT THE FANDOM DRIVES ME CRAZY #anyway ty ty <33 #i didnt want to respond to each thing individually because while i LOVE hearing ur thoughts !!! everything was already said in the last one #so ykw . <33 #qpr anon ✨️#911 abc

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lonelywhalien22 · 1 year

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I love our long messages! Don't stop LOL :')

Yoongi is also my favorite rapper in BTS!!! AGHAKDFJDKF 🤣😂 I definitely feel you with Hobi - he carved out his own little niche in the rap world! My mom actually really likes him because of this!

I'm the same way when it comes to theories and stuff LOL - when I was deep into the fandom in 2018 and everyone was trying to piece together HYYH + LYS storyline, I was so lost - I just enjoyed the cinematic MV's 🤣😂

Omg yay!!! 'Trigger the Fever' is one my favorite songs ever from them! It just makes me really happy 🤗 You're correct! It was one of the songs on the latter part of the setlist before the (multiple?) encore!

Omg omg 'Golden Hour' LOL - I have so many thoughts 🤣 Given the teasers with the bigheaded characters and Mark's furry mask, I literally went in thinking this would be awkward and quirky as hell LOL. When the song started, I was genuinely impressed and I was like "Mark getting out of his loser era . . .???" UNTIL THE DAMN "I CAN'T MAKE EGGS" line LMAO - I had to pause for a minute because I was laughing so hard. My friend thought it was corny, but I actually liked the talking interlude part - Man's had a point :3

I feel you about the extra umph with Kpop! My parents keep wondering when I'm going to phase out of it, but I don't think I ever will frankly. So much effort is put into this beyond music. No judgement - you jam out to 'Sticker' if you like it 😂 We need fans like you too <3 How was The Link tour? Ten is my NCT ult too (as much as I simp about Renjun 💀😂). I also have a soft spot for Yangyang and like . . . lol a 'thing' for Xiaojun 😅

Bestie! You're booked and busy this year, huh?! Tbh, I don't know a lot about ATEEZ 😅 I tried to get into them a while ago, but idk, nothing was really clicking. They have a few songs that I do like though! If you have more suggestions, I'd be open to them :) I'm so so happy you got to see them twice!!! Crossing my fingers for the best that you get to see them again 💙

MOTS was supposed to be my first ever concert too 😭💔 My mom got tickets for us LMAO and she actually managed to snatch AMAZING seats too (it was like level 100, second row or something really close). Honestly, I don't think I will see them in this lifetime - I have bad luck with BTS concerts even before they were super mega popular :') I tried for AGUST D (even bought the dang membership again LOL) and didn't get into the ARMY presale. My friend did manage to get VIP, but I'm terrified of the GA for her 😬😅

You'll have to keep me updated about all your concert experiences to come!!! Amidst new jobs, moving, etc., I can only afford one more concert this year (since I have to travel for most of them and that's an additional cost 😞) and I'm banking all my money on SVT 😭 They are my ults and I wanna see OT13 before the m-word starts 😥

Otherwise if timing doesn't work out well with my new job and I don't get to see them, I think I'm going to try for LSFM or Red Velvet. Do you like any gg's btw? I totally forgot that Baekhyun is having a world tour too????? Besides B.I's Waterfall album, BAMBI was definitely my most played album of 2020 🤣😂 CHEF'S KISSES - he never fails to surprise us just when I think something is his best work yet.

SZA must've been something else!! I've only heard good things about her shows. We'll see about Ed Sheeran and if time/money allows! I'll keep you updated. I don't doubt Taylor Swift will have another show!! Rooting for you~

@twogyuu I’m still highkey embarrassed/ashamed of the length of what follows but you said you didn’t mind the long messages so…

Yeah in terms of kpop being a phase - I told myself that for awhile and I tried so hard not to fall into it more after BTS but there are just so many amazing groups and songs out there. And when c*vid hit I had way too much time on my hands, so yeah...me and kpop are basically trauma-bonded now lol 😂 But for real it’s only increased my love of music and creativity in general so I’m happy to have come across it!

Friend, I’m so sorry you experienced the trauma of the MOTS tour as well. And oof don’t break my delusional heart…I still stupidly have hope that somehow BTS will give us one more OT7 tour after the military 🥺. Even if they can’t do the choreo anymore and I’ve become an actual adult by the time it happens (🤣) I will still wanna see/hear them with my actual eyeballs and ears lol. I have to believe I’ll have another chance to see them all together. And omg, sending well wishes for your friend…I’m a short girlie and one thing about concerts for me - I absolutely cannot do GA, ever. I won’t be able to see and I gotta deal with people all over me...That mosh pit scene in pretty lies was literally just me randomly writing out one of my greatest fears lol…nope nope nope!!!

The Link tour was fun, getting to see them and all, but I was honestly sad that they didn't perform much of any songs from their newest album - I think it was literally only 2 Baddies (the title track) and Faster 🙁. This newest album of theirs is one of my absolute faves they've released (almost no skips) and I really wanted to hear more of it live, especially Gold Dust and 1,2,7 (Time Stops). But I loved seeing Mark and Taeyong riff off each other during rap songs, Doyoung's voice was absolutely beautiful during his solo songs, MOON TAEIL also slaying vocals, Johnny shirtless lol (but for real - the entire performance of Focus from that set to the choreo was one of the most memorable parts, everyone killed it vocally and performance wise <3), Yuta's amazing Butterfly solo performance, Jaehyun being effortlessly flirty, Jungwoo looking gorgeous irl. And they did a lot of their hits so I really can't complain (faves live were Kick It, Cherry Bomb, Lemonade, Touch, Highway to Heaven, FAVORITE (my fave hehe), and of course Sticker lol 💀). It was a total party! Also Taeyong talking to the audience was too f-ing cute, like I can't - he's actually so soft irl lol 😂

And are we sharing the same braincells??? Because I was originally gonna say this in the last post but didn't wanna sound like I was being selective but like…besides being in awe of Ten, I'm specifically trash for Yang Yang and Xiaojun of WayV 😳😂 For Yang Yang - time of death was when he and Ten released Low Low. The song is such a bop and when I saw his smile at timestamp 0:12 in the mv I was like…yeah I want him. And then his entire part in the first verse of that song like...ugh I totally fell for those lyrics (ik embarrassing) lol. Like the deal was basically sealed after that. Idk what it is about him but he just has this inexplicable charm…like whatever “it” is, he has it. Idk I don't make the rules. And Xiaojun? He is p r e t t y, ok? I am basic. Like do you see how thick his eyebrows are??? But like also his voice and he’s so soft and idk ok imma stop ALKJDLFKF. But for real I gotta see them all live because I just know their concert would be a total party. Sooo many b.o.p.s.

Also don’t feel bad if Ateez isn’t your thing!!! Funny story but the first song I ever heard from them was Wave and I was like oh this is cute, lemme check them out, and then I randomly chose HALA HALA out of all of their mvs to watch as an introduction and I was like - tf??? 🤣 And then I literally didn’t look into them again for like 6 months to a year bc I just did not get why that song was so popular and like now it’s one of my favorites 🤣 They do tend to lean darker for their cb tracks and if that isn’t ur cup of tea, that’s totally cool! I just can’t stop myself from bringing them up in any kpop convo bc I l*ve them lol. But if you really want recs from their discography, idk what kind of sound you gravitate towards so i’ll give you a mix (it’s also bc i love talking abt them and their music so indulge my Atiny brainrot for one last time hehe)

*IF I STAR IT LIKE THIS THESE ARE MY PERSONAL FAVES OF EACH VIBE BUT I LIST MORE AS WELL BC PEOPLE HAVE DIFFERENT TASTES LOL*

If you like softer/more chill/comfort I’d check out - *WITH U*, My Way, *Wave*, *Illusion*, *Sunrise*, *Aurora*, Dancing Like Butterfly Wings, *Promise*, If Without You, *THANK U*, *FEVER*, *Turbulence*, Twilight, *One Day At a Time*, Light, Stay, *Better*, *Time of Love*, Celebrate, *The Letter*, and All About You.

If you like emotional ballads I’d recommend - *Be With You*, *Star 1117*, *Turbulence*, *Not Too Late*, and *MIST*.

If you wanna hear fan-faves/powerful/iconic performance/choreo/hype type stuff (what made me stan them basically) I’d recommend - *Say My Name*, Answer, *Deja Vu*, ROCKY, *The Real*, *Pirate King*, *Treasure* *HALAZIA*, *HALA HALA*, *WONDERLAND*, *WIN*, *Guerrilla*, *INCEPTION*, and *Fireworks* <I’d def recommend watching the mvs for these recs.

Spicy recs if ur into that hehe (watch mv/vid performances) - *Inception*, *Cyberpunk*, *The Ring*, *Fireworks* (ESP. the beginning of the mv), *Deja Vu*, Sector 1 (once again, specifically the beginning lol).

And then if this is getting a little tldr (ik it is i’m so sorry) and I could only choose 5 6 7 songs that define Ateez/songs to inject into my veins I would choose Pirate King, Say My Name, Star 1117, Aurora, HALA HALA, Wave, and The Real.

Did I literally spend a disgustingly long amount of time happily categorizing the bulk of their discography? Yes, yes I did. And I very much enjoyed it 🤪

Also, you don’t have to do this immediately (or ever) if it’s a hassle, but I am still quite new to seventeen’s discography (yay!!!) so if you ever wanna share your song recs (some faves from what I've sporadically encountered so far are Darl+ing, Left & Right, Fear, Do Re Mi, Cheers, *DON'T WANNA CRY omg*, Ready to love, Rock with you, _WORLD, Home, Chilli, Anyone, and Thinkin' about you) + any other content that made you really really like them I would absolutely love that <3 bonus points if the other content involves mingyu, wonwoo, vernon, and/or seungcheol bc i need bias receipts 😏

But enough about MEN. Heck yeah I listen to girl groups!!! Actually, before I found BTS or even knew what the heck kpop was, I remember listening to Taeyeon (before I knew SNSD lol) and Red Velvet. They were my true gateway into kpop. It was like 2016 or 2017, and I was dabbling in Korean R&B (I could go down a whole rabbit hole of recs in this genre too, but i won’t here - feel free to ask more if ur interested in that genre), and I remember really liking Eric Nam’s Interview album at the time (esp. the song Good For You <3). And so I was pouring through his discography and fell in love with this song called Spring Love that he did with Wendy (love Like Water btw). And then from there I learned she was part of a group and I found Red Velvet!!! I played the heck out of their songs, and I could literally list their entire discography, but some of the first gems I ever heard where I was like oh yeah they’re special were One of these Nights, Would U, and of course the iconic Bad Boy. Those women can sing. The harmonies??? The vocals??? Total queens. When they released their most recent album I was playing Feel My Rhythm nonstop in the car for a few weeks - like the people in my passenger’s seat hated me lol but like...the key change at the end??? How can you only listen to that once??? And then the song In My Dreams…my hopelessly romantic, pining heart approves. And like Seulgi??? She’s so cool bruh lol. Loved her song Who Are You with BamBam, and her solo album was so great!!! The cover image for that album is just so iconic to me for some reason. I absolutely loved the entire concept. I am praying they announce US tour dates for Red Velvet 😭 For Taeyeon, 11:11, I Blame on You, Fine, and I (ft. Verbal Jint) were in regular rotation. Her voice is absolutely stunning and it’s like she’s singing straight into your heart or something. Just gives me the feels - like I begin feeling whatever emotion she’s putting into the song. Ugh. And she continues to spit out bops - What Do I Call You, WEEKEND (literally feels like a Friday when that one comes on <3), Can’t Control Myself (obsessed with this song + concept such a vibe), INVU (the way I memorized that little hand movement of the letters that she does in the chorus 💀). Heck - Hotel del Luna is literally on my list of kdramas to watch purely because of her beautiful song from the soundtrack (I think the translated title is All About You) 😭😭😭

And there are so many other great girl groups in kpop!!! Can’t list them all but dangit if I’m not gonna try - first of all I gotta shout out my girls StayC (stayc girls, it’s goin down.) Probably my fave of the newer gen groups and for me their discography is like no skips, esp. their YOUNG-LUV.COM EP. Then there’s Everglow with their insane choreography (the song First like omggg that ones prob my favorite besides La Di Da) and their hypnotizing pre chorus mottos. Like idk how they do it but they always have like some insanely catchy little saying or something right before they go into the chorus or like the chorus is crazy catchy like what the heck lol. Got into WJSN after Queendom, and their most recent release Last Sequence - like omg…the chorus and post-chorus of that song is like a literal d r u g. I gotta catch up on LSFM releases but the way Fearless had a chokehold on me for awhileeeeee. Aespa - once again just mindbending vocals/harmonies. Love Winter and Ningning esp. And the way I still try to do that crazy flat hand thing from Next Level 🤣 and I also weirdly love how that song is like two songs squished together - like ok SM they actually pulled that off for me somehow 🤣 The way both the bridge and the ending sequence of vocals at the end of Savage are absolutely insaneeee and I love hearing it every time it comes on. NewJeans literally releases bop after bop (🎵attentiooooooon🎵) like I don’t know what kind of magic sauce they’ve got going on over there. Weeekly is such a gem as well and I have been following/rooting for them ever since their debut song After School blew up! Their music is full of wonderful melodies! Can’t wait to see where they go! Fromis_9 is great, Oh My Girl, (g)i-dle (MINNIE esp. AHHHH), Hyolyn (straight b.o.p.s.), Viviz is great. I keep hearing buzz about the group XG and am planning to check them out soon when I have some time! Currently loving Kitsch by IVE and am excited to check out I Am. Also Cupid by Fifty Fifty??? (literally know nothing about this group but this song is just a total bop). So many other ggs/female acts old and new that I haven’t listed here, including some obviously super big well-known ones but like it’s a given I listen to songs of theirs as well so I wanted to give some love to my fave faves and some hidden gems <3 So yeah, the kpop girlies are out here doing it and leaving no crumbs. We stan.

Lastly, adulting is a drag lol. I hate transitionary periods and also had my own recently so I’m wishing you the best and hope that once all the logistical stuff is settled, better/great things await you on the other side! And priorities!!! Definitely save your coins for Seventeen and make sure you see them all together!!! Ed is likely to tour again, and I am rooting for you too!!!

#dee:asks

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favefandomimagines · 3 years

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Give Me A Reason to Stay (b.b.)

Summary: the battle is over, you can finally breathe. but will bucky give you a reason to stay with him in Louisiana?

AN: inspired by the finale of tfaws! so potential spoilers and obvs i’m gonna include some angst (stark!reader)

You finally caught a moment to breathe after what felt like years of fighting. After so long of going from one disaster to the next, you could finally stop and pause. Actually enjoy life for once.

Since your father died, you never stopped moving. Being CFO of Stark Industries, helping Wanda escape the authorities after her grief induced episode and then Sam and Bucky called you for help. It never seemed to stop.

But, after Karli died and the rest of the Flag Smashers gone, you could take your well deserved pause. At least for a little while before your inherited work called.

Sam invited you to come to his home town in Louisiana for a celebration of sorts and you couldn’t say no. Him telling you that Bucky was going to be there was also a selling point.

You and Bucky had a complicated history. You helped Sam and Steve stop him and HYDRA and then went on the manhunt for him. Even after finding out he killed your grandparents, you were still there. You understood that it wasn’t Bucky’s mind, just his body. You were there in Wakanda and helped set him free from his trigger words.

But nothing ever progressed from the stolen looks, the longing glances and the quick touches. The amount of times Bucky Barnes saved your life and threatened others who tried to hurt you, you thought he felt something for you. But the nagging feeling in the back of your head told you that you were wrong.

At the celebration, the many neighborhood kids were gathered around you as you created stars in your hands, almost like your own personal galaxy. The kids thought it was magic and you rather liked that perspective on your powers.

Bucky and Sam were talking with Sarah and some other neighbors but Bucky couldn’t focus on the conversation when he was too busy watching you.

Your smile was so wide that he thought it could light up a city block. You looked genuinely happy, a look he hadn’t seen on you in a long time. It was refreshing and your happiness made him happy.

“You’re being creepy.” Sam commented, nudging the super soldier. “What?” Bucky asked. “You’re staring.” Sam said. “I-I was not staring.” He stammered. “You so were. Just tell her how you feel already. I can assure you she feels the same way.” Sam told him. “I can’t just tell her.” Bucky rebutted. “Yes, yes you can. What are you afraid of?” Sam asked.

The 106 year-old man paused for a moment as he continued to stare at you. “I can’t be the one that causes her more pain.” He said. Sam furrowed his eyebrows at Bucky’s answer. “She’s been through too much already. Losing Natasha, watching her father die, the nightmares she has. I’m not back to myself yet and I can’t cause her anymore pain.” Bucky explained.

The conversation was cut short when you approached the two men. “I’m so sorry, Sam. Pepper just called and said the donors are pulling out of the eco-friendly power source project we’re working on. She needs my help fixing it.” You told them.

“Do you really have to go?” Sam asked. “Unfortunately. Pepper says she can do it on her own, she did it before I was old enough but since my name is still attached to the company, I have to go. Board meeting at 9 tomorrow.” You explained. “I’ll go grab Sarah, she’s going to insist on giving you leftovers to take.” Sam said, giving you a nice smile.

You turned to Bucky who was very quiet since you walked over. “So, you’re really going back?” He asked you. “Yeah. Unless you give me a reason to stay.” You answered honestly. And rather boldly.

Bucky wanted to say something so bad. He wanted to tell you that he loved you and wanted you to stay with him there but the words didn’t come out. And if he was already feeling bad before, the look on your face broke his heart.

You gave him a tight lipped smile, a small head nod before you walked away from him. He watched as you slapped a fake smile on, say goodbye to Sarah and Sam before leaving the party rather quickly.

“What the happened with Y/N?” Sarah asked approaching Bucky. “Nothing. She just had to go.” Bucky lied. Sam saw right through it obviously. Something had happened between you and Bucky and he was determined to find out and play cupid.

“What really happened?” Sam asked. “She asked me to give her a reason to stay. And I didn’t say anything.” Bucky answered. “Come on, man. You love her, she loves you. Y/N wouldn’t give you the time of day if she couldn’t handle your baggage. You need each other more than you want to admit, Buck.” Sam said.

Bucky sighed and cursed himself for letting you go. “Okay, what do I do?” He asked. “Go to New York. Pull a rom-com move and crash that board meeting and tell her that you love her.” Sam answered.

And Bucky did just that. He got on the first flight to New York and came up with a whole speech in his head for what he was going to say to you.

He made it at the nick of time and was surprised he still had security clearance to the building. When he arrived to the correct floor, he saw Pepper standing in the hallway.

“Bucky, I didn’t expect to see you here.” She said to him. “Where’s Y/N? I need to talk to her.” Bucky said. “She’s in the conference room, preparing for the meeting.” Pepper answered.

Bucky practically ran to the conference room and almost broke down the door.

“B-Bucky?” You questioned. “I love you, Y/N. You asked me to give you a reason to stay and I was scared. Scared that I’d cause you more pain and you don’t deserve that after what you’ve been through. But I can’t deny that I love you anymore.” Bucky confessed.

You were at a loss for words, not really expecting a love confession from Bucky Barnes. “You love me?” You questioned quietly. “Yes. I love you.” He said. “Come back to Louisiana with me. We can start over, have the life we both deserve. Or, I can come back here and you can still help Pepper run Stark Industries. I don’t care as long as I get a chance at a life with you.” Bucky added.

“You really mean that?” You asked. “I really do mean that.” He answered. He watched you intently as you processed everything Bucky had just told you.

You looked down at your presentation notes before you picked them up and folded the papers in half. “Friday, can you bring Pepper into the conference room please?” You asked the AI. “Of course, Ms. Stark.” It said.

You and Bucky waited in a tension filled silence when the door opened. “What’s going on?” Pepper asked. “I think it’s time I sign those papers.” You told her.

Pepper smiled widely at you, happy that you were choosing yourself over the company for once. “It’s about time.” She commented. “I’ll go get them drawn up.” She added before leaving the room.

“Wait what papers?” Bucky asked. “I’m giving every aspect of the company to Pepper. I’ll no longer be listed as an executive for Stark Industries. Which means, I can go anywhere I want for as long as I want.” You explained.

“You mean-“ Bucky started. “I’m going to Louisiana with you. For however long you’ll have me.” You interjected. Bucky laughed lightly as he made his way over to you, cupped your face in his hands and kissed you deeply.

It was a feeling you both had been waiting for and it was one that was definitely worth the wait. You had been putting off your personal life out of fear it wouldn’t work but now you just wanted to be with each other. No matter what happens down the line.

“And if it wasn’t obvious, I love you too.” You said once you parted. “I’d hope so, doll.” Bucky replied.

—

You and Bucky approached the large gathering of people with food in your hands, saying your hellos and giving out hugs and handshakes.

“There you two are! I was wondering if you’d ever show!” Sam scolded you two. “What do you expect? We’re newlyweds.” You laughed. “And it’s about damn time it happened too.” Sarah commented.

You sat down at the picnic table, Bucky resting his flesh hand on your thigh. You stared down at the ring on your finger quite fondly and thought of your dad. Hoping he’d be proud of letting the company go three years ago and living your life to its fullest.

“Aunt Y/N! Can we see the stars again?” Cass asked with all of his friends behind him. “Can’t say no to a future leading astronomer now can I?” You teased the boy. You got up from the table and stood a few feet away, creating the stars with your hands like you had years prior.

Again, Bucky watched you fondly but this time he wasn’t pining after you, hoping he’d build the courage to tell you how he felt. He was watching you as his wife and as his future.

“You really do love her, don’t you?” Sam asked. “Yeah. I really do.” Bucky answered, a smile adorning his face. “You’re going to be amazing parents.” Sarah added. “Parents?” Bucky questioned. “Oh no she hasn’t told you yet.” Sarah said, standing up from the table.

“Is Y/N,” Bucky started. “Am I what?” You asked. Bucky turned to you and rose from his seat so he could stand eye to eye with you. “Are you pregnant?” He asked.

You looked behind him and glared at Sarah before staring back at Bucky. “Yeah, yeah I am. You’re gonna be dad James Bucky Barnes.” You told him with a watery smile.

Just the thought of bringing a child into the world with Bucky made you more emotional than you thought possible.

“I’m gonna be a dad?” Bucky questioned. You nodded your head and Bucky scooped you up in his arms and if felt like everything was falling into place.

After 109 years of not having an ounce of peace or feeling as if he was a monster and a burden, he was getting the life he had always dreamed of. And he got to do it all with you.

#imagine #imagines #marvel imagine #marvel #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan #tony stark #sam wilson

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sugrbugz · 3 years

Text

their reaction to you coming out as trans!! : BOKUTO, KENMA, AKAASHI, OIKAWA, TSUKKI, & ASAHI ♥︎

CW: this covers topics such as gender dysphoria, transphobia, and ignorant parents. please be safe my loves!!

transphobes get the fuck outta here right now

also i’m ftm myself so i’m writing from my own experience! if you want a non binary one or even mtf let me know! ♥︎

BOKUTO

would be so very excited to go clothing shopping with you but also giving you all of his hoodies in the mean time-

would love to show you off as his official boyfriend, would fight transphobic people for you

“hey bo, can we talk?” you asked softly, only causing him to open his arms wide from where he was sitting on your bed. you crawled into his lap like you always did, your hands shaking a bit when your wrapped your arms around his neck. “what’s up little owl!” he smiled wide, flashing you that beautiful smile of his. “it’s sorta serious love..” you mumbled making his smile fall only a bit, it falling completely when you started crying. “lovebug? what’s wrong..you can talk to me baby” he soothed making you nod. “i know we’ve talked about your preferences before and i don’t know where i fall but-“ you hiccuped, trying to figure out how to say it. “i’m transgender..i want to be a boy” you sobbed out, ultimately terrified he’d leave even though you knew he wouldn’t. “no..” he started making you cry only harder, not even three seconds later were calloused fingers there to wipe them, “you are a boy..not want, right baby?” he smiled softly, kissing your nose.

KENMA

his emotions would hurt him first only because he wouldn’t fully understand why you’re so upset

best hair stylist in the game!! he’d do your hair so you don’t have to deal with judgemental old ladies and weird barbers.

would 100000000/10 drop anything hes doing to snuggle you since he knows how much of a bitch dysphoria can be

it actually happened by accident. currently you were in the bathroom, shaky hands on a pair of scissors you’d found in the kitchen. it was one of those moments. you weren’t officially out to anybody, not even your boyfriend just simply out of fear of being disliked. however when kenma came to use the bathroom after doing a five hour livestream her heart almost shattered right then and there. you were too into your head to even notice his presence, snapping back to reality when he took the scissors from you. that’s when the tears started. he was quickly to pull you close, kissing your head. “i think i understand..but if i don’t, please explain..” he whispered softly into your ear. “i-i..” you stuttered, you didn’t even know how to say it. “i’ve been dealing with my gender for awhile and came to the conclusion that im a boy..” you sniff, snuggling into his chest since the comfort felt good. “okay baby, you’re still mine okay?” he spoke so soft it was reassuring. “but come to me instead of butchering your hair, you know damn well i could cut it better. dork.” he winked sitting you down to actually cut your hair properly.

AKAASHI

wasn’t totally surprised even though he is oblivious to most things

he would be so sweet about it??????? he wouldn’t even question you???? just accepting right away

after you were ready to come out? god he would be so overbearing with how supportive he was. “hey have you seen my BOYFRIEND?” or “are you doing okay, pretty boy?” he would do it all the time

he already knew. you’d asked him to pack your laptop in your book bag since you guys were going to study at the library. he usually didn’t snoop and honestly minded his business, but when he saw what he thought was a dildo his curiosity was peaked. you had millions of tabs open, all pertaining to the concept of gender identity. his heart softened sadly, upset by the fact you did this all alone. you came up to check what was taking him so long, face dropping when you saw what was open, “i-i promise i can explain-!” you rush forward but he quickly wraps two arms around you, kissing you softly. “shush. you don’t need to explain.” he smiled, “your preferred name and pronouns my darling?” he hummed in addition, grinning from the blush on your cheeks. “uhm..y/n..and he/him..please..” you whisper making him nod, “i’ve got the cutest boyfriend every yanno that?”

OIKAWA

would make fun of you for a bit until he realized this was actually serious

he would also apologize profusely for doing so.

would go out and buy you 67963334 slacks just to see you in them i know it

“tooru i’m serious!” you’d whimper, genuine tears pricking at the corner of your eyes. that’s when he knew he took it too far. “hey..i was just joking around…does me calling you girlie actually make you uncomfortable? why?” he was confused but then again you couldn’t blame them. you’d told iwa you were trans, hoping to get someway to tell oikawa but there wasn’t much acknowledgment of him at all. “yes..it does” you nodded wiping your eyes. “is it because you’re trans?” all the air in your lungs was knocked out of you at this. “how did you..” you’d ask softly, “i dunno! i’m just really good at this!” he giggled before kissing your head and getting off the couch you two were on. “one minute!” he ran upstairs and about five minutes later came back with all his old clothes he outgrew. “here! ‘ma saved them for donating to relatives but your more important” he hummed making you blush, “tooru you don’t-“ “and what’s your pants size?” “uh-i-“ “it’s okay doesn’t matter we’ll get all of them.” “ALL OF WHAT.” and that’s honestly how the rest of your night went.

TSUKKI

he wasn’t totally surprised but then again he knew how your parents were and would understand your hesitation for coming out

it didn’t really phase him at all. have you seen his gender nonconforming best friend? tsukki wouldn’t care unless you were authentically yourself.

would always give you reassurance, no matter how much you needed.

you’d come to your boyfriends house for the third night this week, his mom more than happy to let you stay. “he’s upstairs!” she’d smile from where she was making dinner. you already knew where to find his room, so coming inside and throwing your bags down casually wasn’t an issue at all. “y/n how many times do i have to tell your messy ass that you don’t put bags in the middle of the-“ he spun in his desk chair to look at you, his face falling the second he saw your face go red and tears streaming down your face. tsukki fucking SUCKED with emotions but he wouldn’t be pathetic and not try. “cmere moonie, what’s wrong” he frowned getting up and sitting on the bed, pulling you down with him. “i told them” you stated simply, his own anxiety kicked in. “and?” he asked, already knowing the answer. “they kicked me out.” you nodded towards the fourish bags you had dropped. “well..fuck them. here you’ll be loved and respected. they don’t deserve you. no one does. now, ill ask mom if we can move in the old dresser from akiterus room..you make yourself comfy. change, take of makeup, whatever it is. here? you’re allowed to be who you are.” and with that he was gone. tsukki may look like an asshole but he tries his best not to be for you.

ASAHI

wouldn’t initially get it, but it would take some explaining and he’d be absolutely on board

would probably smoother you in love and affection for being brave enough to tell him how you’ve been feeling

similar to akaashi he’d be quick to correct those who use incorrect pronouns (unless you tell him not too) while expressing love for his boyfriend

dating asahi had plenty of benefits, most importantly his ability to scare those off who were rude to you. you had come out to him a week ago, he needed some help understanding the process but soon he was very on board and understanding. now you two were eating lunch with noya and tanaka, watching a group of girls who ever now and then looked back at you to laugh and point. you’d just gotten your gender affirming hair cut the night before. you began to feel very self conscious about everything, just slowly tucking yourself into asahi who immediately realized something was wrong. “what’s up babe?” he asked watching you nod towards the group. with that he gently passed you over to noya who was very excited for the hugs he was allowed to give his close friend. needless to say asahi scared the living hell out of those girls. when all was said and done, he took you to the boys bathroom and locked the door. he simply hugged you, rubbing your back while you almost immediately cried. “it’s okay bunny..i’m sorry people can’t mind their own business-not that it’s my fault-i dunno why i apologized-sorry-i-“ he took a deep breath but his nervous rambling had made you giggle. “thank you, you giant teddy bear” you smiled leaning up to give him a nice soft kiss.

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tharros-auris-black-asimi · 3 years

Text

Lay All your Love on Me (Chapter 8) (Part 2)

Paring: Dark Soft Alpha Lee Bodecker x Female Omega Reader

Summary: After moving to Knockemstiff, Ohio with your troubled parents, you find solace in the local Seven-Eleven. There, you bump into the Alpha sheriff, Lee Bodecker.

And then you keep bumping into him. There’s just something about the chubby Alpha that keeps drawing you in. Now there’s something going on with the new preacher of the church that you attend. Everything’s a mess.

But you’re an unbonded Omega. Life can turn to shit anyway.

Chapter Warnings: This chapter includes more possessive behavior from our Alpha Daddy. Maybe some stalking too? Just a little bit of smut in this one. Some vaginal fingering. As well as some fluff and a marriage proposal from Lee. Not officially, that'll be in a later chapter, but they do discuss marriage. There are death threats and gun violence from our Omega Reader. And we can count the dead body in this chapter, lol. Talk of unplanned pregnancy and rape in this one.

Additional Notes: Part two was a lot longer than I thought it was, and I didn't want to cram it all in one single chapter, because there was just so much going on that I didn't want to confuse anyone. So, that's why I had to split it in half. So this is the second half! Much longer than part one, lol. Please refer to the chapter warnings before proceeding, and minors, DNI.

Word Count: 7,262

The familiar dinging of the Seven-Eleven brought you back.

Back to the first time you had met Lee.

Officially.

A warm feeling rushed through you. Almost like you were giddy. A pep in your step as you showed Sandy to the way of the lovely drinks of heaven, aka slushies.

There was familiar music playing.

You even said hello to the cashier up at the front when you had come in.

The linoleum aisles really brought you back.

You had so many happy memories with Lee here.

It made you feel so warm.

Your Omega was delighted to be back at a place she was familiar with. This place… she knew this place. She spent time with her Alpha here. Memories of you and Lee came back.

Plop. Plop. Plop.

“Okay… so you can choose whatever flavor ya want. They got cherry, Lee really likes that one, blueberry, and grape. I like to get cherry and blueberry. Mix em together. Tastes and looks nice.”

Nods came from Sandy. She watched as you filled up Lee’s cup with the cherry, happily humming a tune under your breath. Then you did yours. Mixing the red and blue together with your straw, before you plopped the correct lids on.

Click. Click.

The sounds of you sticking the straws in made Sandy come back. You were smiling, even as you took a small sip of your mixed slushie.

A slow smile stretched onto her face.

“Okay… I think I get it now. Any flavor, you said?” She questioned you.

“Mhmmm… any flavor.” came your response.

Sandy’s gaze turned to the grape flavor.

A full smile spread onto her face.

“… What do you mean, we’re leavin’ early?”

You were blinking. Your mother just let out a sigh. You looked so confused.

Laying on the big folding chairs in the backyard of Lee’s home, wearing nothing but a tank top and shorts underneath your bikini top and bottoms.

Because of the fucking creep in your house. You wanted to avoid him, and be cautious if he was looking at you from the windows.

“… Emma called again. After lunch. Lee gave me the phone, and she explained to me the issue with Lenora. So I told her we’d be going early. Is that okay?”

Was it okay?

You shifted your body, so you could be laying on your side. Your fingers tapped against the folding chair when you answered your mother.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

“I’m not sure if I’m okay with leaving Lee and his sister with that freak inside the house, mama.”

Said freak being your technical brother-in-law.

It wasn’t like you were married to Lee or anything. But the thought made butterflies erupt in your stomach. Made you feel all fuzzy inside. Your head lift.

You had given the idea some thought. Would you entertain the idea as well? Sometimes. Did you want to marry him?

After much deliberation, yes. Yes, you wanted to marry this man.

Oh did you want to marry him.

So badly.

But with the current weirdo in your house, you probably couldn’t even talk to Lee about it. Because every time Carl was in a room with you, you just avoided talking to anyone altogether. Other than the times where you would be in bed with Lee. Then yes. Other than that, no. Not at all.

Up came your mama’s hand towards her forehead.

She had been anticipating this.

Oh yes, she had.

Because you weren’t wrong.

Carl had so many red flags.

So many red flags.

Many, many red flags.

Every time she saw him, your mother’s fight or flight reflex would act up.

It was like looking at her husband almost.

Terrified could be one word to explain how your mother felt around the man. Almost like she felt as if she was walking on eggshells around him.

He just gave her so many bad vibes.

“I know sweetheart, I know. But Lee will be fine. He’s the sheriff. He can handle himself.” Was what she told you. Tried to reassure your nerves.

You, however, were not that reassured so easily.

You still raised an eyebrow in suspicion.

You were worried for your Alpha.

How could you not be? He was your Alpha, for fucks sake. You were bonded to the Sheriff of Knockemstiff. He was your Alpha. Your Lee. Your Daddy.

You had a right to be worried about him.

So you couldn’t help it.

It was perfectly reasonable.

Very reasonable, in fact.

“I dunno mama… I’m still a little bit worried.” You admitted quietly.

And your mother could understand that.

Even with her Beta status, she knew how it would affect a recently bonded Pair.

Because you were recently Mated.

She saw the bite mark on your neck from Lee that proclaimed you as his. The fucking entire county probably knew you were his alone by the bite in your neck. And if anyone were to speak an ill word against you, well, your Daddy would set them straight. Lee Bodecker, Sheriff Lee Bodecker would see to it that no one spoke any ill word against his mate.

Because you were his. His alone. His Omega. His other half. Lee knew for a fact that he would murder for you. Hell, if you even asked him to murder someone, he would still do it. Because that was how much his love ran for you. It was so deep.

And now that you had his bite on your Mating Gland, well, he knew for a damn fact that if someone were to take you, they would have to pry you from his cold, dead hands. Or body. They would have to kill him first to get to you. And he wasn’t going to let that happen.

As you and your mother were in his backyard, laying on the foldable chairs from where he watched from your shared bedroom that used to be his once upon a time, he watched.

Was it out of line, or even creepy to be stalking you?

Probably.

But did he care?

No.

Absolutely not. He didn’t give a single flying fuck anymore.

You were his now. So he had a right to be concerned, where his other half was.

Completely reasonable.

But Lee… Lee didn’t know where this surge of possessiveness had come from.

Ever since you had bitten his Mating Gland and you and your mother had moved in, the Bond complete, Lee felt something shift inside of him. Almost like a change in the air.

For the past couple of nights, weeks even, you had been adjusting. Throwing out your nest over and over again. Lee would hear you in the bedroom when he’d come back from work, having thrown your nest across the room like you were a freaking superhero. Grumbling and hissing underneath your breath about it not being in its proper place.

Throw out. Fix again. Throw out. Fix again.

Rinse and repeat that for the past few nights, and now, now as Lee moved so he could sit comfortably in the nest, watching you get up after saying something to your mother that made her sigh in fondest, padding back into the house, it was perfect.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

The sounds of your footsteps smacking against the hardwood floors of the hallway caught his attention.

Seeing you at the doorway, mumbling and spewing curses underneath your breath as you slammed the bedroom door shut behind you, shoving your shorts down. Revealing your bikini bottoms. He watched as you slipped on a pair of jeans like it was nothing. Shimmying into them and hissing to yourself, oddly sounding like, “stupid fuckin’ creepy motherfuckin’ Betas,” or something like that. Grabbing a scrunchie from your vanity that you had moved in from your house, tying your hair up. A few strands of hair falling free into your face, which you tucked away behind your ears.

When you finally did look at him, a genuine, real smile stretched over your face. Walking over, allowing the beacon that was your Alpha, your Daddy, his big, strong arms wrapping around you, surrounding you in his scent that reminded you of home.

Nuzzling your face into his shoulder, against his uniform. Against that star embedded into his uniform that made the slightest bit of arousal leak from your pussy.

A soft, gentle sigh was expressed from you.

His voice was throaty when he spoke.

“When you come back from visitin’ Arvin and his folks…”

Up came your head. Looking at him, encouraging him to go on with that wide, innocent look in your eyes that you saved only for him.

A nod.

He continued.

“I want to get married. I want you to wear my ring and my mark. I want you to have my name.”

His hands came to cup your face as he talked. You listened.

Thrill ran down your spine.

“… Want it, Daddy… want Daddy all to myself… want your name, Daddy…” your response was breathy as you looked at him.

Something broke in him.

Shattered.

Cause just then, Lee had grabbed you, spun your around, landing right on top of your vanity. He made sure to not smack you down loud. You had guests in the house, after all.

Well.

Sandy was in the living room with your mother, who had just come in. Carl, thank fuck, was out doing god fucking knows what.

There was a noise of Lee unzipping your jeans. He shoved them down your ankles. In fact, just for good measure, he shoved your bikini panties down too. Shoved three thick fingers into your pussy that was already leaking.

You gasped.

Keened, even.

How could you not?

Although… although you would’ve preferred your Daddy’s tongue, his fingers worked just fine. That feeling of your pussy being plugged always gave you pure bliss.

Pump. Squish. Pump. Squish.

Lee’s breath ghosted against your mating gland, making a shudder run down your spine as he fucked you with his fingers.

All the while, secure in the knowledge that his own little sister and future-mother-in-law were in the next room.

No more fucks had been given.

You were so full.

Oh so full.

You were cumming in no time at all, your walls clenching down harshly onto Lee’s fingers. Shuddering as you came. Feeling like someone had smacked the air out of your lungs.

Deep breaths and pants came from you.

His lips were pressed down onto your mating gland. The tip of his tongue peeking out, before his tongue licked your gland, making your hips stutter. His fingers still buried deep inside of you, all the way up to his knuckles.

He was buried so deep inside of you, but still, that wasn’t enough.

And then his fingers were moving again. Pushing back up inside of you, filling your pussy up.

Smack. Smack. Smack.

Keening noises came from you. Wet, squishing noises echoed with every thrust of Lee’s fingers plunging back into your wet cunt. You had to hold onto your vanity, gripping the edge so tight that your knuckles were turning white. You were so wet and turned on, having just come once already.

It wasn’t until you came for a second time, your second orgasm piggybacking from your first one, a soft little whimper filling the bedroom as you clamped down onto his fingers, your breathing turning a little breathless. Softer.

“Daddy…” your voice was softer, bringing the Alpha back.

Squirming came from you when Lee licked your gland again. Your back arched up against his front, your toes curling up, making you rise a few inches. His arms wrapped around you, his scent coiling around you.

“Mean it,” his voice was a little rough, “wanna give you my name, babydoll. Want this whole goddamn fuckin’ county to know who your Alpha is.”

Your pussy throbbed. A low hiss came from Lee at the sensation.

“When my ma and I get back… when we get back… we’ll do it. It’ll be the first thing we do, Daddy.”

“Promise?”

His voice was a low rumble, making a deep shudder spread down your spine.

“Promise.”

When you turned so you could look at him, Lee noticed you trembling.

“I… I mean it, you know.”

You were shaking. Absolutely feeling so many emotions all at once.

“I… I really do wanna marry you. I got your mark already but… I want your name. Your ring. I really do. I already got ya mark but… I really want it. You. All of you. I… I want your pups too, Daddy.”

Words were coming out so quickly you weren’t really quite sure what you were saying either.

But the next words… those next three words… you remembered them. You remembered them well.

“I love you… I love you so much,” you were crying. When had you started crying?

But whatever now.

You were crying and spilling out your feelings like a lovesick teenager.

Your Lee, your Alpha, your Daddy, he wrapped his strong arms around you, bringing you closer to him as his head dipped down, his tongue flattening against your gland, making your ears pop. His scent overflowing your nose as he scented you. Marked you. Your body shuddered against his. Your Omega was overjoyed.

Alpha. Alpha. Alpha. Alpha is a good Alpha.

“I love you too, Little Omega.”

A couple of hours later...

Something was deeply wrong once you and your mother had driven up to Coal Creek.

It was like a fog that had seeped through your bones, once you had gotten up to the house.

However, you were broken out of your current train of thought when you saw Arvin running out of the house, running towards you, picking you up, and making you squeal.

Alphas and their strength.

“Everythin’s been so boring without you!” The young Alpha complained once he put you down, “the whole house’s been silent except for Lenora’s puking!”

Puking?

How… peculiar.

Very interesting.

It made you raise an eyebrow, as Arvin helped you and your mother inside as your sleepy brain tried to rack at what Arvin had just said.

But you didn’t dwell on it for far too long, considering once you had finally lodged your suitcase into your room, you had crashed immediately on the spot.

What had made you wake up from your slumber though, was puking.

Someone was puking their guts out in the bathroom.

Groggily, you stirred.

Even made a noise of deep discomfort from being woken up. Your Omega even stirred. She was also not very happy with these changes of events. You heard her in your mind, grumbling unhappily at the Omega who was currently vomiting her guts out.

After you managed to lodge yourself out of bed, you padded down the hallway, down to the bathroom, where the vomiting had been coming from.

What you saw made you nearly shriek.

Lenora cried out in surprise.

But that wasn’t what you were focusing on.

Your eyes were wide.

Your nose smelled something.

Something was very wrong with Lenora. You sniffed at the air.

Strange.

The brunette Omega watched as you walked over to where she was, kneeling over the toilet. She watched you get onto your knees, grabbing some paper to wipe her mouth.

“Need you to stand. Can you stand?” You asked her.

A nod.

Being as careful as possible, you helped Lenora up to her feet, helping her to the sink. Helping to rinse her mouth. Lenora coughed and spluttered the first few times. But eventually, you managed to help her rinse her mouth clean of any bile or puke.

“I’m gonna need ya to brush ya teeth. Can you do that? Brush your teeth?”

Another nod came from her.

Nodding at her, you quietly gave her some space. Some time to brush her teeth, while you scurried out of the bathroom and down the hallway again, into the living room.

After scouring around for everyone or anyone else who could be in the little house with you and Lenora, you found that it was just the two of you.

The Russell’s car wasn’t in the driveway. But your mother’s car was still in the driveway, which you assumed that she had caught a ride with Emma and Arvin. Finding yourself back in the kitchen, you also found that she had left the keys on the dining table.

You heard her spit into the sink. Then you heard the sounds of the sink being turned on and off. Padding footsteps made you aware of the fact that she was coming into the kitchen where you were.

That uneasy feeling filled you up again.

“So… how long have you been pukin’?”

Lenora blinked in surprise.

“U-Um…” she looked almost nervous, her voice stuttering. “A-About… a week now? I dunno why. Maybe I’m comin’ down with somethin’-”

You sniffed the air again. Lenora looked confused.

“What’re you doin’?” she asked, bewildered.

Still, you continued to sniff the air.

“Arvin said you presented. Did you have any toys? Emma provide you with any?” you inquired. Lenora’s cheeks flushed. “I- no. N-No. I never… I never got to.”

You raised an eyebrow.

“Whatcha mean, you never got to? You’re supposed to?! You stayed home, right?!”

“N-No.”

You were even more confused.

“Lenora…” you were still very confused, but you didn’t want to frighten her. Scare her. Nothing of the sort. So your voice became gentler. “Lenora… when you present… you’re supposed to stay home. Your presentation… it hurts like a bitch.”

Lenora made a noise.

“Language!”

You waved that away.

“Bah,” you were unbothered, “you’ll cuss eventually. It comes to everyone.” Undeterred, you went on. “Any penny saver… your presentation. It hurts a lot. You’ll go into heat right after. It’s what happened to me.”

“Did it… how much did it hurt?” Lenora asked you tensely. Almost as if she was walking on eggshells. Clapping a hand gently on her shoulder, you steered her to the couch. It was time for a heart-to-heart. Omega to Omega.

“Well… it depends on the person. For me, it hurt like a bitch. It felt like… I felt like I was doing to die. As dramatic as that shit sounds… it really did hurt. My Ma had to send me to the damn ER cause all I would do was climb the walls like a bitch in heat. The whole thing… it felt like I wasn’t really… myself. Like I wasn’t all there, you know? Like… I was there. Subconsciously. But my designation… my Mega… she was in control. It’s kinda a helpless feelin’, bein’ in heat. All you want to do is fuck and breed. It’s what your designation craves. Needs. After though… I was still in pain a little bit. After-effects of heat. And I was really tired. Conked out for the next couple of days to recover. That’s why you gotta get a week off of school. Why weren’t cha in the house recoverin’? Where were you?”

Although now, you were thinking to yourself.

You were Bonded now.

You had a Bondmate. You had an Alpha.

You had never told Lee about your heats. About how much they hurt. For as long as you could remember, they were always painful. Many trips to the ER and hospitals didn’t do you any good. You had to be quarantined from everyone else because your scent was so strong. So thick. You remembered throwing fits, pounding your fists on walls, and screaming because it hurt so much. Your designation would wail and rage within you, wanting her needs to be met. Your Omega, your Omega was truly one of a kind.

In truth, you could admit to yourself why you hadn’t told him just yet.

You were terrified.

Truly utterly terrified.

What if you hurt him?

What if you killed him?

What if he saw what you were capable of during your heat and decided it was too much?

No.

No, no, no.

The mere thought of it was breaking your heart.

Your Alpha, your Daddy, he wouldn’t do that to you.

Would he?

Lenora faltered. Even paused. She looked like she had been slapped.

She had gone silent.

You sniffed at the air again. You could smell her scent of vanilla and cherries, yes, and while your brain processed that this was an Omega in front of you, something just wasn’t feeling right in your gut.

A darker, deeper feeling was twisting your stomach. It made your brain go into darker thoughts.

Lenora looked almost terrified. Her eyes kept darting around. Her scent shifted and started to burn your nose. Your eyes even watered a bit, smelling how her sweet scent slowly turned sour.

“Hey, hey, hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to tell me where you were. But I need you to listen to me carefully, okay?”

Your voice was nothing but gentle as you gently looked at the younger Omega. Your voice washed over her, coaxing her. You were sending off soothing pheromones, calming her frantic and shaking form.

Lenora let out a sniff.

“The world for us Omegas… it’s a dark and dangerous place out there. Always gotta be on our guard. Fuckin’ knuckleheaded Alphas who can’t take no for an answer. And for us women… well, we still gotta be on our guard. Men are stupid.”

A choked noise came from Lenora.

It made your Omega straighten up.

Your head cocked to the side.

Suddenly, it clicked.

Shit, shit, shit.

She was pregnant.

Lenora was fucking pregnant with a fucker’s pup.

You couldn’t explain the feeling that had run through you. It was as if someone had poured a bucket of ice-cold water over your head. It gripped you like a vice. Trapping and ensuring you in place. You might’ve even called the feeling pure horror seeping through your bones.

But you wouldn’t call it pure horror that was running through your veins at this moment. It was more than that.

“Lenora… were you visiting your mother?”

She only responded back to you with one word.

“ Yes.”

Now…

You had never been one for faith.

You weren’t a believer.

Not even when you had been younger.

You didn’t know why you didn’t believe. You hadn’t really given it much thought as you had grown older. Going to church seemed like an obligation. Almost as if you had to go. Truth be told, you always fell asleep during the sermons. So there was that.

But as you drove your mother’s car down to the church, your jaw was tight.

Those dark thoughts were back.

It had been a while since you had slipped into that dark headspace. Not only that, but it had been a while since you had actually driven a car. These days, you didn’t really drive, considering you just walked everywhere. A small town did that to you.

Growing up, especially in your dysfunctional household, your parent’s car was almost like an escape for you. Other than your room. Even then though, whenever you’d sit in your parent’s car, hearing the shouting coming from inside the house, the car didn’t quite still feel like your own.

Unlike the car, your room was strictly yours. Yours and yours alone. Your parent’s cars had their names on them. So it didn’t really feel like yours.

However, your new bedroom, after the attack, it didn’t quite feel like yours anymore. To be completely and utterly honest, you had felt like you had been in haze for the past couple of weeks. Like you were just here. Like a star up in the sky, aimlessly floating through space and time, just observing everything around you.

You felt like a ghost.

Although, at this moment, you didn’t feel quite as empty as you had been these past couple of weeks.

Now?

Now you felt ready and secure to kill a man.

An Alpha.

Never had you ever felt so angry to the point of violence. You weren’t a fucking pansy. You weren’t a fucking pacifist. You believed that if violence was truly needed, that you would use it. Only if it was the last possible option. Then yes, you would fuck shit up.

Here and now, however, violence was truly your one and only option.

Emma, Arvin, and your mother had come home to the Russell house a bit ago. You told them that you’d be going into town and that you would be dropping off at the church, to clean up Lenora’s mother’s grave and put new flowers down.

So, with a newly bought bouquet of flowers, a scrubber, and some water in an old plastic bottle, you drove off to the church.

But you had a darker motive in mind.

As you drove up, you made sure to wear your Mate’s leather jacket. Somehow, smelling Lee’s scent, it made you feel safe. That what you were about to do was okay and justified.

It was okay.

It was going to be okay.

Finding a place to park the car, you took the keys out of the ignition. Stuffing the keys into the front pocket of your dress, you got out of the car with all of your things. Your eyes were sharp and focused, blood roaring through your veins. Even your Omega was in full and complete support. The entire duration of the car ride, she strayed, staying at the back of your mind, tapping her paw in turn. She was silent and feeling quite deadly. Ready to rip a man’s throat out. Her anger kept perfectly under control. But she was like a ticking bomb. She just needed one thing to tip her off, and you were pretty sure that if she wanted to take over and attack a man, that you wouldn’t be complaining.

Not really.

The sounds of scrubbing slowly filled your ears as the birds chirped in the trees. You were wearing gloves because you weren’t fucking stupid. Plus, you didn’t really like these gloves anyway. Your mother had bought them for you a few years back, because they were on sale at Sears and because she thought that had looked nice.

They looked fucking hideous.

Absolutely an abomination to gloves. But, they were easy to put on and take off. So that was a plus, you supposed.

Only when you had put down the bouquet of flowers did you hear a noise.

A leaf crunched.

Someone was walking towards you. From where you were, knelt over Helen Laferty’s grave, your head turned.

Immediately, your Omega screeched in alarm.

It was him.

The Alpha that had single-handily ruined Lenora’s life.

Preston Teagardin, with his scent of maple and something musky, made itself known to you.

Not that you wanted to know.

Not really.

“Preacher,” was your cold response as you turned your head back, and adjusted the flowers.

He couldn’t help but blink in surprise.

He had noticed you driving a car into the church. Saw you pull in, dressed in a dress with all of your crinolines underneath your dress, making your skirts puffy and out there. He had seen you get out, with all of your materials. You looked like a woman on a mission. And well, he was definitely curious.

Subconsciously though, his Alpha was telling him something was wrong. But Preston being Preston, ignored it.

Your scent had intrigued him. You smelled wonderful. Like freshly baked chocolate chips.

Although now, especially with that leather jacket draped over your shoulders, clinging to your form, making you look smaller, he caught another whiff in his nose. A deeper scent. It was a masculine scent. Chocolate and bourbon filled his nose too. He almost thought maybe you had a brother who was an Alpha, but then his eyes fell upon the bite on your mating gland that you showed proudly.

You had an Alpha.

The last he had seen of you, you had not had an Alpha.

So that meant you were recently bonded.

Preston didn’t know whether to be shocked or angry that you were bonded.

Finally finished with your work, you turned back to the still shell-shocked preacher and stood up. Brushing off your skirts.

“You know preacher, it’s quite interesting.”

He was confused.

“What’s confusing?”

Your lips stretched into a smile.

“It’s quite confusing to me. I’ve never been one for faith. Never truly got into the church, or believed in Him. I’m not very spiritual, or religious. Never have been. Never truly believed in a higher power. But that’s not all that puzzles me. You wanna know what truly puzzles me though, Preacher?”

When he didn’t answer, you cocked your head to the side appraisingly. You took a step forward. He took a step back.

“It truly puzzles and interests me that you, you’re a Man of God, aren’t you, Preacher? You’ll listen to someone if they need to confess their sins, won’t you? Take it to the grave? That’ll it just be between me and you?” you inquired. You tilted your head back, looking at him. Waiting for an answer.

“I-I…” Preston stammered, making you tilt your head again, almost like a dog looking at its master.

“Because really, I find it very, very, very interesting that you’re not aware that rape is forbidden in the Bible. Don’t you know when the disciples asked Jesus what they should do about their sexual urges, that Jesus told them to gouge out their eyes? And don’t you know that when Omegas present, that they’re supposed to stay home? And don’t you know, that you’re mated and married to an Omega who doesn’t know that her Alpha and husband is a motherfucking rapist?!”

Preston threw his hands up in surrender.

“No one’s going to care. Who do you think the masses are going to believe? A spineless Omega or a Preacher?”

Your eyes flashed dangerously. In less than a second, you pulled out a familiar-looking pistol from underneath your dress and pointed the weapon right in Preston’s face. You knew it was fully loaded. But, just to check, you made sure to reload.

“W-Wait- this is a mistake-” he stammered, stepping away from you. You watched his feet stumble. He tripped on his own feet, falling into the grass. He continued to push back.

“Believe it or not, I am not a huge fan of violence. Neither is my Alpha. He looks out for me. He’s an amazing Bondmate. I don’t think you’d like him either. He’s the one who gave me this before I came here with my Mama. Just in case. This world’s dangerous, you know.”

You had worn your special shoes for the occasion.

You were not wearing your kitten heels.

No.

You were wearing stilettos. Which, now would be considered out of fashion. But you had been gifted a pair from your Daddy. So, therefore, they were special and were to be worn on only special occasions.

And wasn’t this a special occasion?

You considered it one.

You didn’t even bother to reload a second time. You knew you were fully loaded. And besides, you weren’t going to kill him.

Oh no.

No, no, no.

You’d just give him a fate worse than death.

Seeing his terrified form, you aimed your gun down.

Right there, the pistol facing his left hand.

A gunshot rang out.

You heard a scream. Maybe even a yell.

Moving your pistol down lower, your second bullet went right into his left thigh, dangerously close to his dick. You saw the tears. But you didn’t feel remorseful. This Alpha had harmed a member of your Pack. Why should you listen if he begged for mercy? Which he was. You were hearing his pleas. His begs for forgiveness. You knew right then and there, that your Alpha, your Daddy, would have never spared this man’s life.

However, you were not your Daddy.

You weren’t Lee.

So while Preston was still there, laying on the ground, you made sure to get right down on your knees, your left hand grabbing and twisting his left hand, making sure he wouldn’t touch you. Your knees completely spread, so that you would be nice and comfy.

Lee’s pistol cocked right on his temple.

“P-Please- you’re- you’re makin’ some type of mistake-” Preston pleaded, but you narrowed your eyes.

“No,” your tone was completely cold and unmoving, “No, I don’t think I am. I smelled you on her. Are you doubting my nose, Preacher? But don’t worry, I won’t be ending your worthless life today. Be happy that I won’t shoot your goddamn cock off. And besides, you should be grateful I didn’t shoot your right hand. If I truly didn’t give a shit, I would’ve fucking murdered you and left you for the birds. They’ll eat anything. Especially pieces of shit like you. But I don’t think even birds would want to feast on you.”

"I ever see or hear you rape another goddamn Omega, I'll make sure to really kill you. Consider this a goddamn motherfucking warning."

Getting up, and ignoring his whimpers that truly made him sound like a pathetic Omega in heat, you gathered your things.

As you walked past him, back to your mother’s car, you spoke one last time.

“Don't be sad, Preacher. Ya still got a right hand. I know it’s not your dominant hand. But you have a right hand, Preacher. Use it.”

Later on in the evening, back at Knockemstiff with Lee…

Believe it or not, but Lee Bodecker did not enjoy killing.

Even though he knew he was a corrupt Sheriff.

He had heard the rumors. The whispers. Gossip flew around quickly. Especially in a small town like Knockemstiff.

And the saddest part was that they were right.

Someone like Lee, someone who looked like Lee didn’t get to the Sheriff position without a little bit of darkness in him. Lee had long accepted the fact that he had crossed the point of no return. That if there was truly a God up there, with Heaven, that he would never be permitted to enter. He already knew with all the killing, deception- that his soul was black and damned.

There was no going back now.

Lee’s eyes were gazed, focused on the chair on his right. He could smell your lingering scent on it. If he leaned back and closed his eyes and focused hard enough, he could probably hear your laughter. He could probably imagine your smile too. Just the thought of that black box shoved in the top drawer of his dresser made his heart warm. Like there was something worth living for.

The sound of Sandy’s fork clanging on her ceramic plate caught Lee’s attention. He saw his little sister getting up, getting all of their empty plates, and marched right into the kitchen. Lee relaxed in his chair, hearing the sink turn on. Hearing the sounds of Sandy washing the plates.

For a moment, it was quiet. Lee could actually hear himself think. All leaned back, everything in his life nearly in peace and harmony.

“You know, I thought about her for a long time before I actually saw her again.”

Carl jumped.

Actually jumped.

He had jumped in surprise.

“We met at church, you know. Me and my Mega.” Lee was so relaxed, so deep in old memories.

“Took me two weeks to see her again. I felt so sorry for drinkin’ the rest of her slushie. But I just wanted to know why she was just so in love with drinkin’ em. For those two weeks… all I thought about her.”

Which, Lee was technically speaking the truth.

But not the full truth.

He remembered, in those two weeks before he saw you again, all those sleepless nights spent in his bed.

And now, he thought, what if he had been a good man.

A good man didn’t slick up their cock with Vaseline and jerk off to the thought and memory of kissing a defenseless, young Omega who was probably nearly a decade younger than him.

A good man didn’t masturbate himself to the near brink of death in the shower thinking about just how good your pussy would be if he fucked you for the first time.

A good man didn’t masturbate to the thought of his young Omega partner whom he was courting, cumming at the thought of how tight her cunt would be, or if blood would trickle down her legs after taking her virginity.

Lee Bodecker however, was not a good man.

At all.

Remembering his brother-in-law’s words, Carl’s face went pale as a sheet. Lee was so relaxed without a care in the world that he didn’t even have the ball to be smug about it.

The sounds of Sandy's footsteps made both of the men look up.

“I brought the tea.”

Sandy Henderson, with her hair in rollers, wearing her nightgown and her slippers adorning her feet, gave her Big Brother and her husband a look. Her gaze on Carl lingered just a bit longer. As if she was giving him one last look.

There was a clunking noise as Sandy placed the little ceramic teacups with the little covers on top of the table. Handing one to Carl and Lee. Sandy herself sat down at one of the chairs, stirring her cup with a little spoon.

When Carl took the top off of his cup and drank from it, he felt there was something wrong. Something in his gut turned and twisted.

Lee wasn’t surprised to see Carl get up from his chair, and start to cough. Nor was he surprised to see Carl claw at his throat, blue spit dripping down the corners of his mouth. Sandy sat there, staring Carl directly in the eyes as her husband breathed his last breath before he fell to the floor.

The Omega watched her Beta husband die kneeling. Like a sinner confessing their sins.

“Hold on, won’t cha Big Brother? Gotta get something from the bedroom.” Sandy got up, even pushing her chair in like a good little housewife, before clamoring her way down into the hallway, into the guest room.

Sandy came back with a camera.

Carl’s camera.

The one that he used for all of his murder victims. Lee didn’t feel a chilling in his bones. Sandy got real close, good enough to take a full-body shot. But focused on the horrified look in her husband’s eyes. Ones that looked like ones of pleading. As if he was begging for repentance.

Lee heard the camera click. Sandy shook the camera, hearing it splutter for a second before she got the photo out. An almost satisfying, chill smile stretched over her lips.

“He had a lot of photos, Lee. But this one… this one’s my personal favorite.”

Getting up from his chair, Lee looked down to inspect the dead body of his former brother-in-law.

“Ya brought the marriage papers?”

“Yup,” replied Sandy.

“And the photos?” Lee raised an eyebrow.

“Brought all of 'em,” the blonde Omega said in almost a relieved voice.

“Good. You burn them. I’ll take care of his body.”

Sandy could get on board with that.

It was a plan.

With you, late in the early morning…

It seemed, after your detour with the Preacher, that you could not sleep.

You had tossed and turned in bed all night.

Eventually, you had thrown all of your fucks out the window and got up quietly from your bed, opening your door ever so slightly so you could slip through. Padding your way down the hall, to the kitchen. Where the phone was located on the wall.

Picking up the phone, you spun the dial.

Spin. Spin. Spin.

There was a moment of silence as you heard the phone connect.

There was another moment of silence before you heard the other person on the other line pick up.

“Ello?”

“Daddy.”

Lee breathed out a sigh of relief. Your Daddy sounded sleepy.

“Did I wake ya up, Daddy?” your voice was low. You didn’t want to wake anyone up.

“No, babydoll. I wasn’t sleepin’. Had a busy night, that’s all. Couldn’t sleep, could you baby?” his voice washed over you like thick syrup. You felt as if you were on frigging Cloud Nine. You felt so warm. So safe.

“Nu-uh… couldn’t sleep. Had quite a day today, Daddy.”

“Oh yeah?”

You heard some shuffling on his end of the line. Almost like he was moving around in bed.

“Miss you a lot, Daddy. The nest don’t smell like ya.”

“I miss you too, angel baby. Nest’s not the same without cha in it.”

He heard you intake in a deep breath. And then a deep shuddering noise came from you. Hoisting his legs over so he’d be sitting, he asked, “Ya alright, Mega?”

You faltered for just a split second.

“Daddy, I… I… I need to tell you something.”

That didn’t sound good.

Whenever Lee heard those words, or “we need to talk” in the past, then usually, those weren’t good words. Nothing good ever came out of those words.

“I’m listenin’, babydoll.”

He heard you take in another deep breath before you continued.

“I… my Omega… I feel like… like my heat’s slowly comin’. It ain’t gonna come tomorrow, or any day this week, but… I… I feel like my Omega’s warnin’ me as if she’s tellin’ me the storm’s bout to come my way… and… and I never told you but…” a loose sigh escaped your lips, “my heats are… awful. Every time they happened in the past… I felt like I wanted to die. They were so painful, Daddy. I don’t… I don’t wanna scare you…”

As Lee listened to you over the phone, it made him think of his own Rut.

He thought about how the week before he had seen you in that Seven-Eleven again, how he had gone right into a Rut. You, your scent, your Omega- it had thrown him in a frenzied Rut. He had never remembered any of his Ruts hurting like that before.

But Lee Bodecker wasn’t scared. He never was like that, even when he had been younger. Never ever.

“I ain’t scared of your Omega. I can handle your Omega. I’m your Daddy, ain’t I, babydoll?”

“Y-Yeah…” your voice had turned breathy. “Y-Yeah, Daddy.”

An agreeing noise came from Lee.

“Daddy?”

“Yeah, Mega?”

“I think…” you chewed on your bottom lip for just a second. “I think… I think you need to come to Coal Creek.”

“What?”

Now he was concerned.

“What for?”

“It’s… it’s about Lenora. Today… earlier, I… I went to the church. I went to the Preacher and I shot him twice. With… with the pistol you gave me before my Ma and I left. He raped her, Lee. She’s pregnant with his pup. And I think… I think if I tell Arvin, that he’s going to kill him. I need your help, Daddy. Please.”

There was a beat of silence from the other line. For a moment, you thought Lee might've hung up on you.

But then, you heard it.

"Don't cha worry babydoll. San and I will come. You just stay there. Behave, ya hear me?"

You swallowed thickly.

"Y-Yeah, Daddy. I'll be on my best behavior."

"That's a good girl. Hang tight, got it?"

"Uh-huh."

"Good. Go get some sleep, babydoll. I don't like my baby tired and cranky."

You let out a faint giggle.

"Okay, Daddy. Gonna sleep."

"Mhmmm."

There was another beat of silence.

"I love you."

Maybe it was that you were getting a little sleepy. But you smiled anyway.

"I love you too, Daddy."

And then the line went dead.

Taglist: @greeneyedblondie44, @bxnnywriting

Series taglist: @queenslvy

#lee bodecker smut #lee bodecker x reader #the devil all the time #sebastian stan fanfiction #abo dynamics

95 notes · View notes

cloudykaii · 3 years

Text

preferred company

pairing: bts x royal!8th member!reader

summary: after years you decided it was finally time to introduce them to your life... things go wrong almost immediately.

warning(s): vague harassment, idea of bad parents, rich/bad people, violence

note: this is written the way it is because this is an open concept! i will write more about this based on requests in the future, like a series but it is it’s own au!

You stared in the mirror, fingers twitching as they graced over the elegant material of your silk dress. Hair done to perfection, makeup enough to only highlight regal features and match the jeweled pin in your hair, you truly looked the part of the descended royal you were.

For the first time in your whole life, you felt nervous. You had been attending and hosting these parties since you were an infant. You knew how to play the role of caring and sweet hostess better than anyone, but this time was different. While usually you were just surrounded by a crowd of snooty, privileged people you were forced to stay quiet around, tonight you would be in the company of the people most important to you as well.

Your brothers were more important to you than they would ever know. For your whole life, everyone had told you that being yourself was bad. Your parents had drilled it into you since birth that you were to be quiet and appease the people in your presence. Of course, there was nothing wrong with having an opinion, the problem only arose when you started to say it. “No one cares about the opinion of a silly little girl,” your mother used to say. It was your job to keep your guests happy, and appeal to them, not to actually say how you truly felt.

But when you met them it was different.

When you first started with Bangtan, you had more quiet and reserved. it had been scary enough to be the only girl in a group of guys, and even scarier when you were the same age as the youngest member. You had been prepared to be babied, after all, you had gotten the treatment your whole life, but they had been quick to prove that they valued you beyond a pretty face. They didn’t even know who your family was so you knew the fact that they were kind to you had nothing to do with your lineage.

They treated you like another human being. The seven of them had expected you to earn their respect just like anyone else and that was exactly what you did. But after years of hiding this side of your life from them you finally decided to invite them.

You knew they were curious, after all you were only ever as vague as you could possibly be about your family. Little stories, never mentioning relatives or discussing when you would be home for what reason. But it had been years and after they had treated you like family, you refused to continue hiding this part of you from them. They had all called you to double check when they received the invitation in the mail, but you made sure to inform them that it was correct.

Yoongi hadn’t been too pleased about the black tie notification, but he had assured you he would come. You didn’t know why you were practically trembling with nerves, you knew they would come. They were family, closer than the one you were connected to biologically, and they would never lie to you.

You brushed another curl out of your face before making your way downstairs. Guests had started to arrive an hour ago but the difference between old money parties and others, is that the further you turned your nose up, the more people pretended to like you. Heels clacked on the tile as you smiled at the some of the guests, not really caring about what they had to say anyway.

“Y/N,” your mother came close to whisper in your ear. “Your, er- friends are in the foyer. Do greet them before they ruin the celebration, won’t you?”

See, that was another thing you hated. You didn’t understand why it was just so impossible to respect the fact that your brothers didn’t try to please anyone else in order to achieve their dreams. Even right now when you made your way to them, they were looking around unimpressed. “Hello,” you greeted with a smile.

Hoseok grinned when he looked at you, immediately going to pull you into a hug. “You look beautiful.. but whats with the party?” ah, it was just like them to get to the point. Your smile was genuine this time as you looked at him. Your plan was to just start talking and let everything explain itself, maybe answer questions if they had any.

“My parents just host them sometimes. It’s an upper class kind of thing,” you said, voice getting lower as you started to get nervous. “I don’t know, usually I’m forced through these things by myself, but I remembered how you guys were all talking about not having an opportunity to wear-”

Jin chuckled, raising a hand. “Y/N, you don’t have to explain. It’s us, we’re not going to judge you based on your family.. besides, I think I can honestly say that we’re the most attractive people in this little castle or whatever this place is.”

Maybe you were biased because you knew all of the other people here, and knew what kind of people they were specifically, but you would have to agree. First of all, they were all dressed in black suits. They looked as though they had put in minimal effort, but they still managed to outshine most of the crown there. You would have complimented them if it had actually surprised you, but instead all you did was smile at him gratefully. “Actually, I-”

“Is there a problem here?” All eyes turned to you when you visibly tensed at the sound of the new, male voice. A young man, about your age, although plenty taller than you, appeared at your side, His arm wrapped around your hip only to pull you into his side, and Jungkook was quick to stand up straighter at the sight. “Your mother sent me to check on you.. said I should be worried about my future wife.”

“Parker-”

Your words were cut off by Jimin glaring at him harshly and cutting in. “Future wife? Y/N, what is he talking about?”

“Uh-”

Parker stepped forward, raising an eyebrow like he was in control. “Excuse me, I’ll have you know that my father-”

Jimin rolled his eyes at that. He had no patience for someone so pretentious and ignored the rest of his words in favor of looking over you. None of them liked how uncomfortable you looked. “- and our parents have arranged for us to be wed.”

Yoongi’s head snapped to you. “Y/N, you’re in an arranged marriage?!”

You opened your mouth to speak, only to but cut off once again, which made you have to take a deep breath. “Yes, and I would like to know just who you are harassing her!”

Jimin scoffed, stepping closer. “Yeah, well I would like to know who you are and you had your hands on her.”

You opened your mouth one last time to try to speak and diffuse the situation that was quickly drawing a crowd, but you were spoken over yet another time.

“I don’t have to answer to you.. you hoodlums-”

“Alright!” you yelled, cutting off the spoiled man you would have filed a restraining order against a long time ago if your mother wasn’t so fond of him, and sending silence into the room. “I’ve had about enough of men talking over me! Now, these men are my family and you will treat them with the same respect you are expected to treat me with,” Namjoon narrowed his eyes at your word choice as you glared up at the young prince. “And Parker, I’ve told you and I’ve told my mother. I don’t care for being royalty with you, I have my own duties already within my own grounds, and I will not be marrying you.”

“Now, just who do you think-” His nostrils flared and his hands raised too fast along with his voice, but your brother was quicker when he saw how this was going. The sound of his fist hitting with a loud thud rang throughout the room, and all eyes of the party turned to stare. People of nobility stared at Kim Namjoon as his chest heaved.

“I don’t know who the fuck you are, I don’t give a damn. If you touch her like that again, if you ever even come close to breathing near her, I’ll ruin you. Now get the fuck out.”

The young prince stuttered. “This isn’t your-”

“I said leave!” The glare was still on his face as he watched the back of Parker’s blazer as he shamefully made his way through the crowd. “Party’s over!” And like the cowards that people of such proclaimed nobility are, they scattered and you watched as your mother disappeared with them.

Tense silence hung in the air thickly for a brief moment as the place emptied before Yoongi broke it before sighing and going to sit down, practically falling into a lounge chair. “So that’s the kind of people you hang around, Princess?”

Taehyung snorted. “No wonder you prefer our company.”

#aimee grace writes #bts #bts x reader #bts imagine #bts blurbs #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #kim taehyung #park jimin #jeon jeongguk.#bts 8th member #bts eighth member #bts fanfic

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jarofstyles · 4 years

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Teacher’s Pet

A/N: As requested, here is the first part of our professor!harry series. As usual, this we put our little twist on things and we hope that you enjoy! - n+d

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masterlist

pairing: Harry Styles x Reader

warning: smut, mutual masturbation, use of sex toys

word count: 6.2k

While Harry tried not to show favoritism in his courses, it was hard not to be caring towards the students that showed effort but struggled. That was the case with little Y/N. She was young, pretty, had a bit of an edge to her. From what he had noticed she was kind and often let people borrow pens and once gave a diabetic classmate her muffin when she saw he was a bit pale and taking his blood sugar.

He wasn’t everyone’s favorite professor. He was a tough grader, had a bit of a resting ‘bitch’ face, and he wasn’t necessarily warm and fuzzy. It wasn’t what Harry wanted at all— but it had to be done so that the students wouldn’t just see him as a peer. He had learned that early in. He had to be strict and get respect or he would be stuck with slackers or people who thought he would ‘do them a solid’ as one student had tried to ask with a fist bump. But when it came to sweet students with dyed hair, a devastated little pout, and even watery eyes, he knew he would have to say something.

‘If you would like some help, please come to my office any time after 4. I would be happy to assist in figuring out the material.’

It was written next to a poor grade. He could tell that she had potential— she just wasn’t getting it. He also worried about her word usage. If what he thought of was correct, it would make sense why she was struggling.

School was never one of Y/N’s strong suits. From the beginning of her school career she struggled with getting the hang of concepts and her teachers grew a distaste for her because they thought she wasn’t trying. Y/N was a hard worker though, she did genuinely try, but her best was never enough. A few teachers pointed out that she might have a learning disability, but her parents denied that ever being a case. Her other siblings, both older and younger, were able to grasp concepts easily and were all incredible book smart in addition to being talented outside of school. It seemed that Y/N was just the bad apple of the bunch. Her parents would joke, but of course it hurt. She didn’t even want to go to college originally, but her parents forced her to at least try and get a degree so she wouldn’t be a low life. Y/N only agreed because they said they’d keep paying for her band. Of course, you can only really go to college if you pass though and Y/N wasn’t doing too well.

Professor Styles had always intimidated her, but he just took his job seriously. She could tell by the way he talked about everything that he was passionate about making sure people understood the deeper meaning behind these books and Y/N could appreciate that. It was just a shame that she struggled so much in his class. There were students that excelled in his classes and he was always giving them praise, little surprised smiles and nods, a small ‘good job’ or ‘correct, yes’ here and there. Y/N found herself wanting to try harder in his classes just to get a praise out of him, but she was too nervous to raise her hand even when she did know the answer. This was her third time getting a not so passing grade in this class and Y/N was growing more and more frustrated. She understood the material, or she felt like she did, but whenever it came to reading and remembering, she found herself getting stuck. Little frustrated tears formed in her eyes but she blinked them away, thinking she wasn’t going to muster up the courage to see him today.

But she did.

He had a soft spot for the students that he helped. It was human nature to care for those you spent time with. It wasn’t like how he thought about Y/N though. Okay— he knew it was bad. But he was intrigued by her. Why? He wasn’t able to pinpoint exactly what it was. Maybe her edgy look, maybe it was because she was seemingly submissive and every time he caught her eye she looked like a deer in headlights. She stares at him a lot, he could notice that. But he likes it. So he was pleasantly surprised when she came to his office, looking skittish but also curious. She needed help and he would offer it to her.

“Y/N, it’s nice to see you.” Harry adjusted his glasses and sat up straighter, putting the final mark on a test before looking back up at her with a gentle smile. He had to approach with caution, she already looked like she was going to shit herself. “I’m glad you got my note and weren’t offended. But I was wondering if you’d like some help.” He didn’t say what because he wanted her to tell him what exactly she was struggling with.

Y/N was very nervous, mostly because she didn’t like asking for help from anyone. She didn’t like to seem unintelligent in front of men, especially when they were as attractive as Professor Styles. All the girls on campus talked about how hot he was, how his dominance was a turn on and how none of them were properly able to focus in class. At least they were getting passing grades.

“Hi, professor...” Y/N said softly and closed the door behind her before taking a seat. “I, um... I’m not really good with asking for help.” She explained, pushing a few pieces of hair behind her ear before fixing her septum piercing. Y/N was playing with the hem of her skirt, one of her fingers playing with the fishnet stockings she had on. “I feel like I understand when you’re explaining it and then I go and take the test and it’s like I can’t remember anything you said. But I’m not good at academics anyway so...” Y/N let out a sad chuckle. Her self confidence was pretty low in all aspects, it was a shame because she was a pretty girl. She didn’t seem to think so, hence why she dressed up. At least her clothes she could control.

“Now, don’t say that.” Harry tutted. “I’m sure that’s not true. I bet you just have a different way of learning. If you understand verbally, but freeze when it’s written, that may be the case.” He hummed, flipping through the last work she had handed in. “My question is... it isn’t meant to offend you at all. But do you find difficulty in reading itself?” He approached it gently. You’d be surprised how many adults realize later on in life that they have dyslexia. They were labeled as not the smartest but he was because it took so long for them to understand because the words and numbers get jumbled up. “I’m asking because I notice in your writings, you spell things in a unique way. Or it seems the letters are flipped. This isn’t to embarrass you so please don’t be upset— we just need to figure out why it is that you struggle with the tests.” He leaned forward on his desk, licking over his bottom lip. She was beautiful. In that way when women didn’t know they were beautiful. He wished he could see more of her body— fuck, not going there. Absolutely not. Even though technically it wasn’t like he would be fired, seeing as half the damn staff fucks students. It was always that forbidden element. Either way, he was far too much for this sweet thing to handle. “I would like to help you if you would let me do so.”

Y/N felt really anxious, bouncing her leg to try and keep her composure. She didn’t think she was smart. She wasn’t good at math, wasn’t good at science, she was decent at English but even that seemed to be difficult now that she was reading classics that were barely in modern English. She just decided that learning wasn’t for her.

“I’m not a reader, no.” She shook her head, Y/N found herself having trouble focusing for a long time and when it came to reading words get jumbled up and she struggled a lot. Especially when she started thinking about it too much. Of course Y/N was embarrassed even though he said he wasn’t trying to embarrass her. It was more just her feeling incompetent. She didn’t like making eye contact with him for too long because she felt like he was staring straight into her soul. She was a bit shy and timid when it came to new people. She appreciated that he wasn’t judging her though. “I don’t know what you could do to help, but if you’d like to try we can? I—I don’t want to waste your time.”

“There’s no wasting time if it helps improve your learning, yeah? Please don’t think of yourself like that. You are an important person, just as important as my other students. I want you to succeed.” Harry promised. It kind of broke his heart that she was so sure that her time with him would be wasted. It made him sad that she felt that way. Why? “How about we set up a time... let’s say two days a week? I have time around now, so 4:15 to 5 where I can help you.” He normally wouldn’t do it for most but he wasn’t going to let her suffer. A passion project, so to speak. “I don’t know your schedule but I would be here during that time normally. I basically live in this office anyways.” He smiled in a joking way. “We can work on understanding first what was wrong and then we can have time to work on the new material.”

Y/N nodded her head in agreement, but it did make her worry. Of course she could only try her best but she was so used to failing that she wasn’t sure how much harder she could try. She was barely passing her other classes and frankly she was thinking about dropping out all together. Maybe she was the lowlife her parents made her out to be?

“Can do... Monday’s and Thursday’s..” Y/N told him, “if that’s okay, I have band practice on Wednesday’s.” She wasn’t sure why’s she told him but part of it was to show that she wasn’t just a stupid girl that she did have some talent or at least she thought she did. “It’s um... it’s really nice of you to do this, thank you.” She told him genuinely, though she was terrified of letting him down. He seemed so cool. He wasn’t like this in his classes, he seemed much more approachable this way. Maybe in another life they could have been friends or more than that... no, he probably wasn’t into girls like her. She needed a cigarette.

“Of course. You have my email if you need to reschedule.” But he could see right through her. Of course he could. “But... if you’re nervous, tell me. I can soothe the worries. I’ll be awfully disappointed if you don’t show up and don’t let me know.” He knew she was skittish. He didn’t want her to back out and not take the time to try at the very least. “Let’s just work on it a day at a time. I hope to see you soon.”

When she walked out, he was ashamed to say he was entranced by her ass. He was such a bastard for thinking about a student like that. So bad. But it didn’t stop him from seeing her eyes when he fucked his fist later that night.

----

The next couple of days left Y/N worried. Coming out of professor Styles’ office had left her feeling on edge, wondering if it was even worth trying. She felt like nothing would save her at this point but this was going to be her last attempt. If it didn’t work out she’d just drop out and couch surf. But she didn’t want to have to do that, her kitty Jinx would have to find a new home and that was something she certainly didn’t want. It was Monday and Y/N didn’t go to her classes today, feeling like it was justified because she was meeting with Professor Styles today.

If she was going to work on herself she wanted to be in the best shape possible, so she smoked some weed in the morning to get her day off right and got her things together before getting her skateboard and making her way to his office.

Harry was pleased when she actually showed up at his office. He was half expecting her to drop his class with how terrified she had seemed the past time, and he was curious to see how she had thought about what her grades and his revisions on her test. He had worn a dark red button up today with suspenders, his blazer off and hair a tiny bit messy. His glasses hung off the end of his nose while he looked up at her with surprise, before a smile came on his face.

“Y/N! I’m very glad to see you’ve come.” He hummed, sitting up and leaning back in his chair. “Go ahead and make yourself comfortable on the couch. Would you like a water?” He had a mini fridge in his office. Without listening to an answer, he pulled one out anyways and handed it to her, rounding the desk so he seemed less scary. The desk was a position of power. One he loved, but also didn’t want to take advantage of when Y/N obviously was terrified of it. “Alright. So... you’ve seen my revisions?” He sat on the other arm chair across from the couch, glasses pushed up now with his copy of her paper. “Good. What do you think about your mistakes? Were they because you didn’t understand the material, or didn’t know what to say in paper?”

Y/N gave him a small smile, setting her skate board up against the side wall before taking a seat on the couch. No amount of weed could have calmed her down, she wasn’t even that high anymore it was just the residual feeling. Right now, she was more concerned about having to tell him what was going on inside her mind when she was working on assignments.

“I—I um... both?” She felt a blush creeping in on her cheeks. “I tried to like... watch videos about it, cause whenever I try to read I just get frustrated.” Y/N explained fiddling with the paper. She didn’t like this feeling, it was obvious that it was something that made her emotional which was why she didn’t really talk about it. She let out a breath, looking over what she wrote and seeing all the red pen. It made her want to crawl up into a ball despite how nice he was being. He was trying and so she would also try her best to keep it together. “I find it really hard to focus..”

“I don’t doubt that you do, Y/N. I’m thinking that maybe this isn’t something to do with your focus, but maybe it’s with your reading? You could learn differently than other people and that's absolutely alright.” Harry felt poorly that she was so sad and embarrassed about it. “Look at me.” When she didn’t respond he was trying a different tactic. Soft but very obviously meaning business. “There we are. Now, this doesn’t mean you’re stupid or unable to learn or do well in my class. You just may need to learn differently.” He stood up and grabbed a book from his shelf. “So this book— I got it online. It has some illustrations in it, and I find they’re pretty self explanatory. Maybe this will help you understand it better. Having an image opposed to words in your mind.” He handed it to her. She didn’t need to know he had bought it himself.

Y/N glanced up at him as he told her to look at him, seeing his face go much softer but his eyes still held that same intensity. She followed his with her eyes as he went to get the book. It was much thicker than the others due to all the illustrations but of course it made her feel like a little kid again. She just wished she could be normal.

“Okay...” She said softly, willing to try anything at this point. Of course she was nervous about going forward with his class seeing as she knew things would only get more difficult. Y/N gave him a small thank you as she looked through the book but part of her felt like it wasn’t going to work. No one was determined in helping her learn, they never have been. She’d always gotten very poor, passing grades because she assumed teachers felt bad for her or knew her siblings and assumed maybe she was just the rebellious one. “Sometimes I feel like I do better on the essays, cause I feel like I get it... but I end up getting better grades on the tests than the essays and it’s... disheartening.” She explained with a small frown, “cause I guess on the tests a lot of the time.”

He furrowed his brows, listening to what Y/N had to say. It made sense if she had dyslexia that she would be frustrated and upset with learning altogether but it was important to her and him as well, that she was able to do what she was meant to do. Whatever it was she had wanted.

“I think you should outline your essays more. Each body paragraph, with reasoning and thought. Come up with 4 to 6 reasons for each, word them how it makes sense to you, and write it that way. The structure taught isn’t the only way to do it.” He explained. Writing down on a piece of notebook paper an example of how she could do it. “I know it must be very frustrating— especially if it’s been years that you’ve had to deal with this. I understand. But I do have faith that you’re able to do this. You are intelligent, Y/N. You just have to figure out the right way to show it.”

Y/N let out a sigh, swallowing thickly as he gave her some advice on how to structure her essays in a way that would make more sense. She would try her best, especially with knowing that he was going to be grading things knowing what her situation was. Y/N was going to try her best to sound smart or collected, but she will admit she hadn’t been paying attention for years.

She pulled out a folder of her English work, pulled out the notes she had taken and the lay out for her essays and bit the inside of her lip. Y/N handed it to him and immediately went to pay with her own fingers. Observing him as he looked through what she had done previously.

“I—I try my best, I really do.. but anytime I get the courage to try it just gets worse and I go back to not trying at all because at least then I know I’m failing cause I’m doing it on purpose and not cause I’m stupid.” Y/N was trying to share her feelings to try and make him understand. “‘s really intimidating being in class with people who pick up information easily and I end up just tuning out cause it’s too fast for me to follow... and I don’t want to be that one girl that holds up the whole class with a stupid question.”

“You aren’t. If you have a question that you aren’t comfortable asking in front of everyone, you are always welcome to email me or come to my office at any time I’m here.” Harry promised. Poor girl. Jesus, what happened to her to make her self esteem like this? “You are very capable. Very much a smart girl. You need to tap into different areas of your brain. I promise, we can get your grade up together, alright?” He felt softness and fondness because he knew that sometimes professors weren’t the most understanding. Granted, he was only like this towards students that came for help— and oddly, even more so towards her, but still. “You don’t have to stop trying. You just need a different approach and we can help you find the right one. Do you like movies?” He suddenly remembered that. At her confused look, he continued. “Movies are scripts. Books. Visual. Do you find it easy to follow along with movies?”

She found it hard to believe him because no one really called her smart, ever. Y/N gave him a small smile and nodded her head, pushing pieces of hair away from her face before nodding and realizing she reversed the work she’d just done. He was a very nice man, it was clear that he was committed to helping her and it was definitely appreciated. She just didn’t know why he believed in her so much when no one else did?

“Well yeah... I can follow conversation and stuff.” Y/N let out a small chuckle, sniffling a bit before she continued. “I think another problem is I get too confused about things like.. the deeper meaning stuff in books. Like the themes and whatever you call it. Cause in my head I know what I think it means but then it’s meant to mean something else and then I think I just didn’t understand correctly.” Y/N was definitely more of a creative. She didn’t like following set rules, she liked going with the flow and following her own thing. It worked when it came to her music, she was able to focus then. But she taught herself guitar.

“I think that you need to first take the book at face value. Don’t look for the hidden meanings the first time you read because it will confuse you more.” Harry cleared his throat. She smelled really good. Like peaches and citrus. He wondered if her bed smelled like that, but stronger.

“Tell me some things you like.” He leaned back into the seat. “Things you think we can connect to projects. You said you’re in a band? Have a band?” He remembered that from last time. At her nod he continued. “You can find a song or make a playlist of songs that connect your head to the book. Say... Romeo and Juliet. Hmm.. check yes Juliet, We The Kings. If you’ve heard of that. You can find songs that help you remember.”

“Yeah, I’m in a band.” Y/N nodded her head a bit at him, “it’s like a indie punk thing...” She wasn’t sure what kind of music he listened to but he seemed young enough to think that indie music was good. Who knows, maybe he was one of those jazz guys with all the sweaters he wears. Y/N wasn’t one to judge though. The check yes Juliet reference made her chuckle, remembering middle school and highschool momentarily. He couldn’t be that much older then. “Yeah, I know that song.” She giggled and shook her head, “but yeah, I understand.” She spoke and took note of that in her mind. Y/N didn’t know how she was meant to explain to him that she spent the rest of her free time doing drugs. Tripping and writing music, hanging out with her kitty. That’s about it. Skating, going out in nature. Fucking. She definitely was a bit of a nympho. She assumed it was because of her need for attention.

“Okay. That’s good then. Use that to try and correlate.” He had felt weird watching her leave the room, seemingly in a better mood than she had been before but still nervous. It didn’t help that he hadn’t gotten laid and didn’t really want to have sex with someone else right now. God, if only he could spread her open and dip his cock into her soft cunt. That’s something he was dreaming of.

He thought about it the next night too. So, with his bored and needy thoughts, he went home and did his chores he needed to do, before he went to lay in his bed with his laptop. To be honest. Most porn didn’t do it for him. He much preferred erotic writing or even more so, cam girls. Sex workers deserved support and he always tipped well, though rarely talking in any of them. He was scrolling down the alternative tab when he found what he was looking for. Tattoos and plump lips, tits for a profile photo and a tongue sticking out. Interesting— and she was live.

He just never expected the exact woman in his head to be placed on the screen, smoke coming from her mouth.

Fuck.

Y/N wasn’t exactly sure how she thought about starting camming but it all sort of just fell into place. She started off just selling her nudes and videos for attention and money but then she realized that people would pay really good money to watch live stuff. It’s a good thing too because Y/N loved being watched. Her cams were usually regularly scheduled, but other times they were spontaneous because she was really horny. bbybunnie was her username, most people just called her pet names though, never by her actual name for obvious security reasons. She had quite the following too. People seemed to love her content. She was fun and bubbly and she felt like she put in a great show both literally and physically. Y/N had just done a bong rip, having her windows open to let the smoke out. She didn’t like smoking around Jinx so she’d let her in once she was properly stoned. She was dressed in a black crop top that said princess on it in gothic font, fishnets, and little black panties.

“Been really stressed lately with college and stuff...” Y/N answered a previous question as to what she’d been up to. “Working on assignments in stuff but it gets hard.” She pouted, turning her head when she heard Jinx scratching at the door. “One second.” She giggled and went to grab Jinx, leaving the door open so she could roam. “Here she is, say hi to everyone.” Y/N cooed in a baby voice. It was quite the sight. An alternative girl all soft with her cat, just starting the broadcast. Her vibrator was clearly in frame, already plugged in. A subscriber bought a heavy duty one for her.

And Harry should have clicked off. Right away, he should have exited the screen and said ‘gotta go’ because this was his student. His student he tutored and had fucking come on here to jerk off to a look alike. But he couldn’t. Not finally getting a look at her body. Soft and curved and delicious. Her tits strained the tank top and little tiny panties, some fishnets. Jesus fucking Christ. He let out an audible moan as he watched her sit back on the bed, talking back and forth with some of the comments.

He wasn’t sure what made him comment.

DaddyH: you look beautiful. I love the fishnets.

She did. And he loved them. A lot of the comments were dirtier but not to the point he could see it turning a woman on. He didn’t get an associates in sexology for nothing.

Y/N was pretty good with responding to comments, they were paying after all, but a lot of them were much nicer than most would think. Her community was used to her streams taking a bit to get going because she liked to get super horny, so once she was properly high she usually talked with her comments about things she’s been fantasizing about and what they’d like to see her do.

DaddyH. He was new.

“Hi daddyh, thank you! You’re new aren’t you?” Y/N said with an excited smile, she liked newcomers. It meant someone was interested in her. “Well we’ve got a special show on our hands then.” Her viewers loved when new people came because the shows were always better. She was visibly hornier. She shifted a little bit so she was leaning farther back on her pillows, bringing her legs up and out so she was spreading like a little butterfly. Of course the panties kept things covered but not much. Y/N pulled them up so they were tight on her, “Gotta get me real wet first, yeah?” She hummed, “love knowing you’re watching me... love when you tell me what you like...” It was strategic to talk dirty as if she was talking to one specific person.

Fuck shit motherfucker. Fuck.

Harry didn’t even see her pussy fully yet and he was nearly drooling. What the fuck had he done in what past life to get this type of luck? He wasn’t sure but he did know that whatever he did, he was thankful. He got a good look at her, her lusty eyes. He was a dirty talker. He loved to sex— fuck the English teacher in him. He loved making women a mess of whines and slick and speaking their darkest fantasies into their ears as the writhe underneath him. Y/N would be a fun one to play with. For sure.

DaddyH: you could play over the panties. They’re cute.

He had a thing for panties and fishnets, and she was going right to his kinks.

“But that’s no fun.” Y/N pouted at the comment, wiggling her panties a little bit so she could rub against her clit some. She let out a tiny moan and hummed, letting her hands move up her body to squeeze her tits through her shirt. She was properly eye fucking the camera too, teasing as she started to pull up her shirt. “I’m frustrated, daddy...” Usually she waited till she got a certain number of tips before she took her clothes off, but she was only a few dollars away so she pulled off her shirt revealing that she wasn’t wearing a bra. The tightness of the tank top kept them up, but these men seemed to love natural tits. Her hand slipped down to start rubbing over her clit over top her panties, letting out little breathy moans of pleasure. “Really want to be fucked...” She explained, “Wanna be full...” Y/N pouted and quickened her pace.

“Bent over a desk.”

Harry had a big oak desk he could bend her over and absolutely destroy her. If that’s something she would want. Harry would wreck her. His hand palmed Over his cock as he took her in and looked at her tits. He was an everything man but tits? He could happily suck on hers for an hour and make marks all over, just to listen to her mewl and feel her on his tongue. He squeezed over his sweatpants, feeling himself heat up as he watched her. She was topless, his student. His student was topless and rubbing her clit over tiny little panties, giving a pout and looking at the camera too fucking similar to the way she looked at him in his office today. And while his rational mind knew he wouldn’t be able to look at her the same— he would want to fuck her even more than he had— he couldn’t stop watching.

It was clear that Y/N’s interactions with Harry had spilt over into her mind while she was getting into it. It was that intense stare that he had, his ringed hands, of course there was also the tone of his voice. How he asked her to look at him that one time. She could only imagine him asking her much rougher and in a deeper voice.

“Daddy...” She whimpered out, teasing her own self over her panties as she read over the comments. Y/N giggled are some, loving he praise if men calling her cute and telling her she was pretty and her moans were turning them on. She went and took off her panties cause she really couldn’t take it anymore, revealing her fishnet covered cunt. “Want a better view, hmm?” Y/N smirked, moving to rip them right over the crotch so everyone could see. “I’m so fuck wet for you... look..” She said all excited, pulling her fingers back to show the strings of wetness on her fingers.

Harry was in heaven. Truly. Or hell, because he wasn’t able to be the one ripping the fishnets up and fucking her in them. Her thighs looked soft and delicate and probably so easily bruised. He could do some incredible work down there.

DaddyH: Lick it clean, sweetheart. I know it’s sweet.

There was no way she wasn’t so sweet that his teeth would fill with cavities. No way. He wanted her taste all over his tongue. He was a very giving dom, very much eager to make his lovers cum again and again and again so long as they complied with his soft rules. It wasn’t difficult.

Y/N’s stomach filled with warmth as she read over the comment, bringing her fingers to her mouth and sucking on them properly as if they were a cock. She was starting to like the Daddyh character. He was so sweet and polite in his choice of words, paid well. What was there not to like? She removed her fingers from her mouth giggling a little bit as she decided to show off some more. Y/N pushed the laptop back a bit, turning so they could see her ass and how she arched her back for them relieving that she’d had a butt plug in the whole time. Sleek and black with a little gem at the end. A lot of the things she had were gifts from subscribers. She had an Amazon wishlist specifically set up for them as well as a regular P.O. Box that then routed to her home. She had tons of back up fishnets, some used ones she sold online as well. Lots of other things. She quite enjoyed it.

When did she put that in? Harry needed to know. Was she wearing that when she was sat on his fucking couch? He would surely lose his goddamn mind if that was the case.

He tipped her $50, asking the question he needed the answer to.

DaddyH: Have you been wearing that all day, pretty girl?

The idea of her squirming in class occurred to him. And then the idea of a little vibrator inside of her that he had the remote to, pressing it on to see her reactions. He would buy her one, fuck. He would buy this girl anything if it meant getting to see her squirm and hear her beg him to let her cum.

Y/N wiggled her bum a bit, turning on her back again with a hum. “I’ve been wearing it all day...” She nodded, reaching over for her vibrator because she really couldn’t wait anymore. Everyone who streamed her knew she was impatient, sometimes if they paid a good amount she’d wait and tease herself first but she was needy today. She just kept thinking about professor Styles. “‘m so needy... been so horny lately, might be on for a while.” Y/N blushed, “or I’ll film some special requests on my onlyfans...” She smirked because she knew she would get lots of money for men begging her to stay but loads for custom content too. Y/N turned the vibrator on it’s lowest setting, starting to move it down on to her cunt where she let out a pleaser sigh. “I wanna cum so bad... just wanna cum.” She pleaded, reading to see what everyone was saying. Y/N turned it up a few notches, letting out a content sigh as she moved it over a specific spot. The feeling was indescribable and the noises that left her just showed how relieved she was.

Harry nearly fell over. Her ass was stuffed when she sat on his couch— and it wasn’t from his cock. Harry particularly loved anal, it was a very hot thing to him and the fact she hadn’t been warming his cock like that was near criminal. Truly.

“Sweet Jesus.” He breathed, finally taking himself out of his pants. Spitting thick on to the head, he spread it over his cock and waited for her to continue. She had an onlyfans? He would be subscribing and buying content. He didn’t give a fuck. He wanted it and it would be the best way to keep her close but far. He was watching how her legs trembled and her mouth fell open at the feeling, her body arching into the buzzing of the vibrator. Oh, how he would hold it against her and finger her until she squirted all over the bed and make her clean it up with her tongue. He was a sexual man but kinky more than anything. The idea of it all... it was so hot and wrong and taboo and it was even better in his cock’s mind that she was a no go zone. Made it hotter.

DaddyH: you’ve got such a pretty pussy. How many times can you cum?

Y/N read his comment and let out a whine, turning up the vibrator a few settings higher once again so she could get even closer to her brink of orgasm. “Let’s find out.” She breathed out and continued to crank up the settings. The closer she got the more she thrashed and bucked her hips both up and away from the vibrator. She was very enjoyable to watch she’s been told, specifically because she just couldn’t keep her mouth shut and that she was willing to take a lot. Y/N must have sat there for a few hours just making herself cum over and over again, both with the vibrator and the dildo she had. Once she was all fucked out, 5 orgasms deep, she just laid there and watched the comments roll in. She giggled at a few, breathing heavily as she slowly walked herself down from the blissful headspace she was in. “Thank you, I’m feeling so much better...” Y/N cooed, giving them a smile. “Have a good day or night!” And with that she’d logged off, happy that she had made a new regular.

-------------------------------------------

[part 2]

A/N: bet you weren’t expecting that huh? 😈 and yes!! punk!y/n - n + d

let us know what you think!

masterlist

#writing #harry styles smut #professor!harry #professor!h #harry styles one shot #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction

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kiirokero · 3 years

Text

Outro: Love is Not Over (4)

Pairing: Daycare Teacher! Hoseok x Single Mom! Reader.

Genre: Single Parent! AU, Teacher! AU, Hybrid! AU, Fluff, Angst, Adorable Kids,

Warnings: Self doubting behavior, self-deprecating language, mentions of deadbeat parents. Y/n’s pretty doubtful of themselves in this chapter :(

Word Count: 1.2k

Note: Happy grandpa Yoongi day!

Summary: Years after a relationship goes south. You are the single mother of a beautiful 6-year-old golden retriever hybrid who you named Yunho. He is the light of your life. Yunho is everything to you, and you’d do anything for him. But you’re a human. Yunho doesn’t care, he will tell you he doesn’t. “You’re still my Eomma. No matter what.” He says. But you can’t help but feel like you will never be enough for him. You can’t be the mother he deserves. You can’t show him the ropes of being a hybrid, and you can’t teach him things the other moms can. But you try. You try your damn hardest. So, when a handsome German Shepard hybrid comes into your life, helping you and guiding Yunho in a way you can’t, you can’t help the cozy home he sets up in your heart.

Chapter Guide:

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Tag List: @kurochan3 @mrcleanheichou @anonymous-armys-blog @alanasfashion

Blogs highlighted in bold could not be tagged. Please message me privately so we can resolve the problem and I can tag you next time ^^

“Are you ready?” I asked Yunho, looking at him through the rearview mirror. Yunho nodded and unbuckled himself from his car seat as we got out of the car. Yunho hopped out and latched onto my arm, a gigantic smile on his cute face.

He had a skip in his step as we walked up to the daycare. We greeted Seohyun with a brief wave and I watched him as he navigated the walls on memory. Looking at the children’s artwork that lined the walls, smiling at some, looking in confusion at others.

Once we reached the classroom, Yunho gave it a tiny knock. Waiting patiently by my side, holding onto my hand. The door swung open to reveal a smiling Hyejin, which Yunho eagerly greeted with a hug that she reciprocated. “Imo!” He exclaimed, tail wagging furiously. “Hey bub!” She smiled, kissing his forehead.

Hyejin let him go and went to give me my hug, “You look tired,” She commented as she held me in her grasp. “Your observation would be correct.” I joked, causing Hyejin to chuckle and playfully hit my shoulder. “Come on in, it’s a rather small group today.” She said as she led us through the door.

As Hyejin said, it was a small group. About 11 kids were playing inside the room, all doing their own little things. “Imo... Where’s Hajun?” Yunho asked, ears sagging in disappointment. “He’s just in the bathroom, bub.” Hyejin explained, petting him on the head, which helped him cheer up.

“Well, hello again!” I heard a cheerful voice call. “Hello again, Hoseok,” I greeted with a smile, one that was dull compared to his blinding one. “It’s nice to see you again. You look nice!” He complimented, which I knew was a lie cause I looked like a bus hit me. Like (almost) every working single mom with a young boy. “Thank you,” I said nonetheless, genuinely appreciating his kindness.

“Who’s this?” He asked, smiling at Yunho, who came to hug my side when Hoseok approached us. I reached down and picked Yunho up, carrying him on my side. “This is my son, Yunho,” I explained, and Yunho gave Hoseok a little wave. I saw Hoseok do a double take in his mind, which was the usual reaction. “Yunho? That’s an awesome name,” Hoseok said to Yunho, which made the hybrid boy smile. “Thank you,” He mumbled.

Hajun suddenly opened the door and Yunho jumped out of my arms to go play with his best friend. I smiled at him as he pulled Hajun to go play with the stuffed animals he spotted earlier. “I didn’t know you had a son.” Hoseok commented, “I thought Hyejin talks about me a lot?” I asked, remembering what he said the last time we spoke.

He chuckled, “She does! But she never mentioned you had a son.” I sighed, unable to hide my smile. “Well, I do. He’s a cutie too.” Hoseok nodded in agreement. “Golden retriever hybrid, right? I’m surprised his dad let’s him keep his fur that long,” Hoseok commented, and I felt my mood dampen.

Hoseok seemed to notice my change in demeanor, stumbling to backtrack over his words. “I-I mean it’s fine that he-” “Yunho’s doesn’t have a dad.” I stated, watching my son from afar as he and Hajun laughed and played together. “What?” Hoseok asked, his head tilting to the side ever so slightly. “Yunho doesn’t have a father. It’s always just been me and him. Since the very beginning.” I swallowed, trying to keep my composure.

“I’m sorry...” Hoseok mumbled.

“It’s fine.”

I gave Hoseok the best smile I could muster and went over to bid my son goodbye. “Yunnie, I have to go now.” I said, and Yunho’s ears drooped a bit before he and Hajun got up to give me hugs. Yunho and Hajun took turns nuzzling their faces in the crook of my neck, and I pet them both on the head. “I love you baby,” I whispered to Yunho, taking in his ruffled hair, his button nose, and his freckles. His features taking me back in time like a time capsule.

�� A time where I was younger, dumber, more naïve. A time where I let people walk all over me. A time where I tricked myself into believing I was happy, happy in hell. “I love you too, Eomma.” Yunho whispered back to me, and I’m reminded that right now isn’t that time. That this is a time where Yunho and I take on the world, the both of us together.

“That was awkward as hell.” I groaned, hitting my head on the steering wheel. After I said goodbye to the boys, the air between Hoseok and I was... Thick. Thick with this aura of “I messed up. Shit.” If I had a knife with me, I would’ve cut the air between us.

Hoseok was obviously feeling bad about his comment. I could tell by the fact he was avoiding my eyes and was being extra careful about his words. He didn’t need to, but I didn’t want to embarrass the guy further by commenting on his apparent guilt.

What was I supposed to say, anyway? “Yeah, Yunho’s father is a deadbeat and any mention of him makes my blood boil in hatred that rivals that of the three furies.” That’s not something you say to a handsome German Shepard hybrid who looks like he’s ready to grovel at your feet.

It surprised me that Hyejin’s blabber mouth didn’t slip that I’m a single mother of an adorable son named Yunho. She usually couldn’t keep a secret for the life of her unless it was really important. She couldn’t help but talk. Not like I minded that, I enjoyed listening to her blabbering.

Maybe she thought it was my information to tell? That’s a possibility. She respected my privacy, but she usually bragged about her second son to anyone who asked. So much to where people thought I was Yunho’s aunt, and not his mother.

Whatever the reason, now Hyejin’s coworker knows I’m a single mother to an amazing son who has a deadbeat father. What a resume. What a look that brings onto me. Human mom and hybrid son. He probably thinks I’m an incapable mother, seeing as he thinks Yunho’s fur is too long.

Is it too long? I’ve always advocated for Yunho doing what he wanted with his appearance as long as it wasn’t dangerous... Maybe we should get it cut? He wouldn’t like that... Is his fur being too long dangerous to him? God, I don’t know... I’m not a hybrid... Yoongi and Hyejin are cat hybrids, so they wouldn’t know. Namjoon is a wolf hybrid which, their fur isn’t THAT different, but enough that he couldn’t help. Jin’s a human... Maybe Hoseok is right?

He’s the dog hybrid, after all. I mean, he’s not a Golden Retriever, but he must know a thing or two, right? Am I being a terrible mom? Should I bite the bullet and cut Yunho’s fur? No... Yes? I don’t know. God I, I just wish I could be better for him...

#bts #bts fic #bts hoseok #jhope #hobi #jhope x reader #hoseok x reader #bts hybrid au #hybrid

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papers4me · 3 years

Text

Fruits Basket,Se03, Ep 8 (part 1)

“ I hate myself, so much, so intensely, so completely, I wish I just go away, disappear for good, & yet in the end, I always protect myself, instead of taking responsibility, I run away every damn time, like now, I’m too scared to even look at your face”. The real kyo under the layers of trauma.

This quotation is why this ep is not abt romance. Instead it is abt: Extreme self-loath, faulty coping mechanism, self-awareness & inability to make correct decisions due to suicidal thoughts & non-existent self-worth.

This is a guy who’s literally seen death TWICE at the age of 4 & 15 (his mom & kyoko), is trying to avoid the THIRD (tohru’s) & is questioning why the FOURTH isnt happening (his own death).

-The layers of a broken self: Excellent writing:

I applaud the writer for choosing fitting methods to portray her characters’ own trauma. Yuki “ prince” mask & tohru’s “i’m okay” mask were fitting to hide their trauma & uncover the real personalities. However, since kyo would be the character to hide secrets & carry guilt, the viewers need to feel he’s hiding sth w/o knowing what it is. It was done cleverly to (a) tie the plot together, (b) build kyo’s character, (c) fit the climax, (d) suit his trauma of severe guilt & self-loath. Some of the things he does can fit two genuine layers: Both layers are true:

His initial refusal to open up to tohru in early se01. (Surface layer): he doesn't know how to interact with ppl who accept him as he confessed to shigure, (Deeper layer): he avoided tohru cuz he knew her!

He initially refused to join leisure activities & trips: hot spring & kyoto trip (Surface layer): he didn’t want to go with yuki (Deeper layer) he didnt want to spend time with tohru as he was unconsciously feeling that he’s stealing from her.

It killed him to see her true lonely self behind her fake mask & approached her with advice. se1, ep5 (grandpa house), se1, ep23 (sick tohru), se2, ep 8 (hiro’s remarks) & other instances. (Surface layer): he was noticing her issues, & genuinely wanted to help her cuz he’s kind (Deeper layer) he was falling in love w/her & unconsciously wanted her to be happy with HIM.

There were times when there was ONE layer, such as: kyoko’s 1st grave visit. He was so off, rigid, unresponsive, & completely shut down. Everybody read him. Yuki, tohru, Arisa & hana. they just don’t know why he behaving like that. his trauma manifested itself deeply that he apologized to tohru in her sleep cuz he was “ too scared to even look at your face”.

- Kyo’s trauma takes physical shape: (Clutching his heart: PAIN, clutching his stomach : DISGUST) :

While confessing to tohru, kyo’s features spoke volumes. You can see disrepair, guilt, broken soul, sadness & surrender. His body reflected his emotions:

wide eyes (disbelief), Cat eyes (utter fear)

trembling body (overwhelmed with toxic emotions)

clutching his fists (anger at self) , opening fists (surrender to darkness)

hand covering face (shame), Hand around neck as he finished confessing abt kyoko & yuki (desire for death: the final judgement)

The most focused physical appearance was his fist clutching his heart: he was in so much pain as he narrated how he loved kyoko & found a friend in her, desired to make her happy, to find tohru for her, how his his mom withered away out of fear of him & how pitiful & sad he felt towards tohru for loving someone like him. It broke his heart to see them all suffer after knowing him. All the love he felt for them squeezed his heart tight, he wanted to pull it & rip it away. Above all, he was sad to loose them all. Sad he can’t be wit them.

Then he clutched his stomach: representing the pure disgust he felt at himself. As he realized that there is no escape from being responsible for their death, as he admitted he illogically blamed yuki, his disgust with himself boiled in his stomach. What kind of disgusting horrible person does that? blame someone illogically? I’m horrible, hateful & utterly undeserving to be forgiven. Being disgusted with one’s own self! oof! it was so well-done with animation!

-Tying Mature Themes with Child Trauma:

Through kyo’s story, there were different mature themes that excellently dictate his behavior, mentality & emotional well-being: Excellent writing!

(1) The desperate need for self-worth: To be good for once!

by constantly destroying his self-worth thro contempt (the sohmas), rejection (his mom), hate (his father), pity (kazuma/ kagura, initially), kyo searched for an outlet to be a worthy human. Someone who deserves to be loved for who he is. He found that in kyoko. It is brilliant that kyo didn’t look for a mom in kyoko. He called her “ old hag”, she told him unflattering facts abt herself “ neglecting her daughter”. she was his first real friend. He found comfort being with her. He wanted to return the intimate feeling he felt deep down, kyo is so hung up on giving as much as taking as it contradicts the notion of pity. The opportunity came! Helping her find her daughter! being someone who does good! Return the daughter & feel worthy of being a true friend, a man (aka a person). “ i’ll help her, I’ll protect her for sure! it’s a man’s promise” The promise in its core is abt kyo wanting to be a person. Not a monster, or a cat. A true real boy. Away from all the toxic past emotions. Being a man: means being a big boy (person) with good achievements! All this shattered when a better boy beats him to it. The boy who was always praised, loved & respected! kyo’s self-worth diminished greatly & all the toxic emotions came back!

(2) The downfall of faulty coping mechanism: Creating a Bad Guy:

I stated before that one of my fave scenes of kyo was in se02, ep23 when kyo lashed out at yuki on the stairs upon seeing the hat & how yuki felt nothing but pity towards kyo as he was stuck in the past while yuki moved on. Brilliant scene that explains why one moved on & the other didn;t. Yuki’s faulty coping mechanism was being withdrawn & shutting himself. This coping mechanism didnt make him feel better at all!!! Also, he doesn’t have regrets nor sins, he dealt with his faulty coping mechanism with tohru’s help & the school council & healed gradually. Forever loving the writer for writing the distinction between kyo & yuki logically without painting any as monster in reality. Kyo couldn’t do as yuki for the following reasons: ( remember the old theme of everybody heals on their own pace? love it )

(a) He was addicted to shifting the blame as it made him feel better abt himself!! he shifted his thoughts from “ I wanna go away for good” “ mom, why didn’t you kill me instead” to “ it’s not my fault at all, it’s yuki” No match between the two feelings! one leads to suicide, the other leads to feeling like a mere victim. The two feelings are wrong tho & He knows that! he isn’t ready to stop the drug. He can’t face himself. “ the bad guy, if he isn’t as awful as you think, who you’re left to blame”.

(b) nothing around him can make him feel better. Tohru? but she’s kyoko’s daughter! she’s a lonely orphan, carrying her mommy’s pic taking to it! why? cuz you didn't save her! Loving tohru? is good & I wish we can run away far & be together always! wake up! why would she wanna be with a disgusting monster like you?!! You dont deserve her! you who caused his mom to die, caused her mom to die, blamed an innocent guy! Yuki? yeah, look at yuki, you can never be like him, watch as his true kindness gets noticed by tohru, the school & everybody!! he’s everything you cant be!! he should be with tohru! not you!! Master kazuma? poor guy! you brought him nothing but misery! you see his sad smile, don’t you? he’s disappoint in you. Kagura? she pities you!

(b) Kyo can’t fix his mistakes. kyo watched as yuki got back with his brother, befriended haru again, goes back to the sohma estate for the holidays. he feels he cant have similar reweds as he cant bring the things he needed. his mom, kyoko, his bio dad’s affection, kazuma’s pride in him, tohru’s love & his own satisfaction at himself. kyo just hates kyo “so much, so intensely, so completely”

(c) his fault coping mechanism mirrors his dad’s. Kids pick up toxic habits from parents all the time. Even his suicidal thoughts mirrors his mom’s! brilliant writing!

3- running away from responsibilities: perfectly constructed theme!

Who didn’t? I’m guilty! ugh! one of the best themes in furuba hands down! Any other writer would have made kyo do it once, or twice & have him face it in climax & then deal with it. but NOT takaya-san! She excellently took her time with kyo repeating this exact mistakes over & over to better portray the theme & take it out from the boundaries of story-telling to realistic depiction & logical gradual progression:

kyo ran away from being accused of killing his mom (he’s completely innocent & isn’t responsible for his birth’s deformity/curse nor his mom’s suicide)

kyo ran away from accepting kyoko’s words that yuki isnt bad & most importantly that kyo is good. He had found relief in blaming yuki, now you wanna tell me I should look into myself? I’m bad! i dont wanna look. your words are weird “ no bad or good” Everybody says otherwise, the sohmas, dad & mom! kyo angrily ran away (completely guilty but excused as child would be).

kyo ran away from facing kyoko’s body & wanted to punish himself with death. Depression took over him as “ master tried to get me to keep living”. (completely guilty in his own eyes, if only he tried to safe her, even if he transformed, Even if she still died regardless!!! he hates himself for choosing the disgusting kyo over the kind kyoko)

kyo ran away from telling tohru the truth upon seeing her, pretended not to know her, slowly dying each time she smiles, slowly falling in love & wishing for a chance with her, a chance he believes doesn't deserve.

Kyo ran away in se01, ep14 when remembering the accident as shigure triggered him. Tohru consoled him & he lost the chance to come clean.

kyo is running away now. Unable to face her “ too scared to even look at your face”. “ I cant forgive me! I dont want you to fogive me either”

So, after running away the first time, kyo should’ve learned better, right? now in the climax, he shouldn’t have run away? Yes, he should. cuz simply, he isnt ready. We dont learn from our mistakes cuz someone told us. we learn when we fix the core issue. A guy who thinks he deserves a chance in life would stand tall, confess his sins, argues, talks, tells the story unbiased, then waits for verdict. kyo thinks he doesn’t deserve to be alive, thus, tells the story with server bias towards judging himself as unworthy. HE decided the verdict & didnt wait for tohru: “ I cant forgive ME! I dont want you to forgive me either” That’s why toru’s words fall flat. “ why cant you see the truth: I love you” he can’t tohru!! cuz right now it is NOT abt love. It is abt trauma!

4- Sever guilt & desire for disappearance (death):

As adults our mistakes loom over us & we’re constantly reminded of the “ what if I had acted differently”. This ties with kyo witnessing his mom’s horrible death at 4 years old. Death in itself is scary. A loved ones death is devastating. Watching it unfold in shocking unprepared way is destructive. kyo was destroyed. Not enough: he gotta carry the guilt as his dad & the sohma hammer the accusations. He gets another chance & loves another person. Only to watch the blood splash reach his shoes. “Guilty” whispers the past. “Guilty” confirms the present. He stands in front of the most precious person to him. Now what? If tohru forgives you, the pain goes away???? You wouldn’t repeat the ultimate mistake of killing her, would you? you ominous creature. Her mom warned you. The nightmare stands hovering over kyo’s head, waiting to come true. IT WILL COME TRUE!!! OMG!!!

if Akito does it. It wouldn’t be kyo’s fault, right? If the car hit kyoko, it’s not my fault, right? if my mom did it herself, it wouldn’t be my fault, right?

But if only kyo didnt ran away, tohru would be alive. If only I pulled kyoko, she wouldn’t have died. If only I wasn’t born, mom wouldn't have killed herself.

The “ if only “ that killed kyo’s mom as she lamented “ if only I gave birth to the rat” will eventually destroy kyo! ugh!!! AMAZING WRITING!!!

5- The Right Time to Heal (self-desire or outside help?):

When yuki was trapped in Akito’s room, haru visited to help. did yuki accept it? NO. yuki didnt even remember much of it. Why? cuz it wasn’t the right time & yuki was too deep into darkness to notice, to accept & to change. It wasnt until he was out, in co-ed school, rebelling against akito, when tohru came, he accepted her, then it lead him to accept School Council & haru. Tohru had Arisa & hana, but never went to them in her darkest moment, hiding she was living in a tent, they were hurt & confronted her, still she kept hiding her fears, sadness & darkest thoughts, interfering in Arisa’s life to provide help, but never allowing them to interfere, until kyo came & broke her mask, she started to complain, talk, show true emotions & want things! She opened up to Isuzu, too. Arisa & hana weren’t the right ppl at the right time for tohru to heal. Kyo had kazuma to teach him better, kyoko to make him notice his mistakes, tohru to love him unconditionally, the right ppl, but all that was in the wrong time cuz he’s in his darkest moment now like yuki was, unable to see or accept. Healing requires self-desire & outside help, but it gotta be in the right moment, when you can see beyond the abyss & into the faint light of dawn. That’s when words will reach the heart. Kyo need to fall so hard, in order to stand up again. Today, he unloaded his burden, threw up the disgust he felt towards himself, spewed all the hate against the real bad guy: himself! Kyo is kyo’s bad guy, has always been. He needs to let go of hating himself & accept the kind gentle kyo that kyoko & tohru saw ~

Side Notes:

This ep is why furuba wins & deserves 20 years of recognition among manga-readers! this story is real! it is NO sweet fairy tale of two lovers. It is abt one’s self & desire to live. All of them struggle with this particular desire: kyo, tohru, yuki & the rest.

kid kyo was looking for young tohru all night! T_T

this ep of kyo confessing/ narrating his past , reminded me of yuki’s 3 eps of him confessing/ narrating his past!!! ugh! I wish tohru had that! ahhhh.

The 4 months in the mountains weren’t training!!!!! they were depression & suicidal thoughts! ouch!!

Perspectives are what dictate our feelings: Through yuki’s eyes, kyo was so happy with a loving father, friends around him & a house outside the sohmas. Thus, yuki envied him & wished to die not knowing kyo was living in trauma & feeling utter contempt & self-loath. Through kyo’s eyes, yuki was so happy with a living loving family, friends around him & a house with respect. Thus, kyo envied him & wished to die Not knowing that yuki was suffering abuse & neglect!

I love the pacing of this ep!!! It gives room to feel pain & understand the situation!!! I didn’t feel the headache of the bullet train!! THANK GOD!!! SO SATISFIED!!! I was invested all the time!

kyoko’s “ I’ll never forgive you” really destroyed kyo & went beyond it to destroy her own daughter! AAAAAAHHHH ~ T_T

I have some issues with the “ I forgot” part. It makes no sense that they make him forget the accident only to do the cheap cliff hanger in ep 6, then lazily weave it into his confession to tohru in ep. 8. He always remembered the accident. Apologized to tohru in her sleep in se01. ep14 for that exact accident, Then in se02, ep 9. It was ALWAYS in his mind! ALWAYS. Sorry Mr. Director. very lame try. lol.

The only thing I didn’t like is the music! very weird choices throughout the ep! especially at the end. Why a happy music over kyo’s “ I’m disappointed in you? lol!! its sad & tragic?! weird!!!!

I will talk abt Tohru will be in part 2. (her choice, kyo’s answer to her & the need to let go of her mom, the sohmas & of... kyo.

#Fruits Basket #Anime Only #GREAT EPISODE #satisfied paper #final season #Part 1

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masterthespianduchovny · 3 years

Text

At the beginning of age of avengers, someone assumes that Tony is the leader and he corrects them and say that it’s Steve.

And that surprised me because I assumed that Steve and Tony were co-leaders, but no, Steve was CHOSEN as the leader of the avengers. I was about to say that Tony was second in command, but I’m assuming that’s Nat.

But, as surprised as I was about this revelation (I literally hadn’t seen the movie in 8 years until 3 days ago), it instantly made sense.

As much as the anti Steve crowd hates on Steve, on several occasions we’ve seen Steve not only inspire people, but also get them to follow him. After someone commits to following Steve, they’re typically loyal to him.

We do not see this with Tony.

The issue with Tony isn’t that he’s flawed and has trauma, it’s how he treats others and how he processes trauma. When you lash out at others, ignore them, insult them (for your own amusement); don’t consider anyone else, etc, you more times than not will alienate people who are ok your side or, at least, want to be. A person having trauma doesn’t excuse how they treat others. And there is only so long most will people up with that behavior before leaving, which is their right.

I believe the only person who stayed by Tony’s side no matter what was Happy. Tony and Rhodey commonly fought and Rhodey even sided against Tony as well. Pepper had to take a break from Tony due to his own actions.

People can forgive flaws, but often struggle to forgive habitual poor behavior and various transgressions that comes with it.

We cannot except people to respect Tony or want to follow when he makes a joke about the PTSD (Capsickle), their traditional clothes (Thor), job endangerment (Rhodey; Tony made a transphobic joke about an event that didn’t happen), as well as sexual remarks (Natasha). And that’s not all that he did. This goes beyond being flaws, especially when you’re supposed to work with these people and they’re allegedly your friends.

He also doesn’t tell anyone about his trauma and OFTEN deflects, which may include insults or cracking inappropriate jokes. No one should have to deal with that all because someone is traumatized, especially as ALL OF THEM are dealing with their own and equally valid trauma.

Comparatively, Steve does not do that.

The people who work with Steve and are friends with him take him seriously. They support him and he supports them.

We see this going back to the 1940s. Peggy believed in Steve based off of his resilience and faith of convictions. She challenges him when he accepts his current circumstances.

After Steve saves literally over 400 men by himself, he earns the respect of not only colonel Phillips, but the men he saved as well. When he says he wants to pick his own team, in addition to the wish being respected, the chosen men flat out say that they’d follow Cap anywhere.

This must be stressed: these men were held prisoner and knew they’d encounter the most dangerous weapon and men in the entire war and readily agreed because Captain America asked.

In winter soldier, Steve is declared a criminal and is on the run. When he breaks into the shield headquarters, he gives his speech and EVERYONE minus hydra agents refuse to launch the coded because Captain America explain to them that some dangerous shit was going down. They believed his word because his actions and his character is THAT respected.

See the trend here: people listening and following Steve because they believe he’s genuine and wants to do what’s right.

In age of ultron, we hear a reference that he was chosen as leader. The events in this movie proves why Steve was chosen and Tony wasn’t.

Whether or not you believe Tony was right to crested ultron, he still should’ve told his team what Wanda made him see AND explained why he wanted to create this tech/weapon. Instead, he deliberately kept it a secret and pressured Bruce into helping him. Ironically, despite the claims that Steve feels like he knows that’s best, this is exactly what Tony assumes.

Let’s be clear: not only are Steve, nat, Bruce, hawk eye, and Thor adults, they are also avengers as well. They don’t need Tony to protect them and they all of the capabilities of deciding if they want to do something dangerous and risk their lives. And it’s ego centric as hell for him to actually believe that Steve, of all people, would guilt him by saying he should’ve saved them. Steve wouldn’t have done such a thing both saying that or even making Tony feel bad if he did all he could do.

Despite creating his murder bot due to not consulting his team because he knew they’d say no, Tony did it AGAIN.

Again, where’s the leadership? Where’s the accountability? Where’s the understanding that he may not like the answer, but he does owe it to his team to talk to them? And, again, he thinks he knows what’s best.

What does Steve do in this same movie? The twins start fighting besides him, which he doesn’t interfere with because ultron is the bigger threat. But, rather than fight them like his instinct tells them, he stop and listens to what they have to say.

I want to note that people like to say (and some are thinking), it’s good that Tony built what eventually became ultron, well, it’s good that Steve extended a hand to the twins. They also played a huge role in why the world didn’t lose half its popular, which was a consequence of Steve’s decision making.

Once Steve heard them out and was willing to let them into the fold, he defended them when other avengers tried to attack them. He didn’t leave them out to dry.

Then, when the actual fight happens Tony reveals a few minutes in that they have no other options but to abandon civilians and let them die.

Steve flat out refuses that as an option and makes the PERSONAL decision to stay until every civilian is safe. Not one person will be left to die.

I don’t know about anyone else, but Steve comes off as the clear leader and Tony doesn’t.

What happens next is that literally every current avenger and the twins stay to help. Nat literally tells Steve that this would be a beautiful place to die and explicitly says she’s fighting alongside him.

Whether or not Steve spoke to people, he inspired them to follow him by his actions.

Who is inspired to follow Tony?

Tony flirts with retirement, which no criticism against that.

But, alongside nat, Steve personally trains Sam, Rhodey, and Wanda for team avengers. After accepting Wanda into the fold, he treats her life everyone else.

In civil war, Steve was hands on with wandas training so she could control her power and made sure was protected. He accepted responsibility for not accounting for unforeseen threats, such as the explosives and explained to Wanda the realities of their job. He was realistic with her, but used that as motivation as to why they should strive to be better. Steve was outraged when he found out that she was locked up and freed her from Tony’s unlawful imprisonment.

Even if someone argues she should be locked up, Tony did not talk to her. Wanda didn’t consent to being confined to the house. This is another example of believing he knew what was best for people rather than talking to them and seeing how they feel. He isn’t giving others the right to make informed decisions for themselves and in general.

Steve, on the other hand, consistently considers what people feel because he TALKS to people. He has meaningful conversations with people, such as nat and Sam. Steve formed connections to people, which made them feel close to him.

But, let’s circle back to Tony, he takes a MINOR without the explicit consent of his guardian. Not only does he take Peter without May’s permission, he takes Peter OVERSEAS and to fight at that.

To make matters worse, Peter doesn’t know WHY he’s fighting or what for.

Where’s the oversight or accountability in any of that?

During the fight, someone flat out asks how old Peter is. Tony follows up after the fight, during homecoming, with almost inviting Peter to stay at the avengers compound. As a reminder, Peter was still a literal teenager and Tony still DID NOT ask peter’s guardian if this was okay.

Where as Steve explicitly tells people what they are getting into. He lays out what to expect and that you have a choice in it. Steve never pressures people into helping him and they usually volunteer. And, whatever happens afterwards, he’s there for them.

How was Tony’s mentorship with Peter?

He’s not actively involved with Peter after taking him in as a mentee, pawns him off in Happy, thinks at status reports are sufficient, and ignored Peter’s concerns. Peter was a minor who just had the most surreal experience of his life and Tony doesn’t think this kid would be amped and itching to do more?

Tony doesn’t think Peter might need some hands on mentorship? Tony thought he could mentor from afar with updates and camera footage, but it actually engage.

Them damned accords!

Tony signed the document due to guilt and tried to get others to sign it despite him being mostly responsible for why the accord even exist or, at least, did a lot of shit that is now being penalized. I’m not sure if he actually read it OR if someone summarized the point.

Whereas Steve DID read the accords and his stance wasn’t one of guilt, but concern and ethical issues with what’s in the accords. Steve was prepared to retire because his beliefs didn’t align with what was being asked of him and others. He didn’t ask anyone to back or follow him.

But, people do eventually back him and follow his lead. They know exactly what they’re getting into. And, despite knowing the risks and eventually getting arrested, they stick to their convictions.

When Tony finds out that Bucky killed his parents, despite knowing that Bucky was brainwashed for LITERALLY decades, he tries to kill him. When cap realizes this, he constantly tries to neutralize Tony.

Let’s go back. Steve knowing that Bucky needs to be arrested, decides to save Bucky both for Bucky’s protection AND so those trying to bring him in doesn’t get hurt/killed. Once Bucky is safely arrested, Steve lets the situation go.

Oh, before I really get into infinity wars, there is no mention of Wanda harming other people even accidentally. :)

Tony, as usual, ignores what others wanted, like strange, and think he knows what’s best. He plans to fight thanos henchman by himself as well as thanos completely ignoring the concept of teamwork. (He also jumps to insulting others for his own shits and giggles—keep in mind, these are people he doesn’t know).

What does Steve do?

He was successfully on the run with nat and Sam and they worked together as a TEAM to save vision. They then meet up with rhodey and formulate a plan as to how to stop thanos. Steve coordinates with various people to have the battle in Wakanda. He doesn’t assume he can fight thanos by himself or should.

Steve refuses to trade lives because every life is valuable.

When the Snap happens, Tony fucks up into his cabin in the woods and lives his life.

And what does Steve do?

Run a support group to keep hope alive for people who are trying to see the best in a shitty situation.

He stays an avenger and does whatever needs to be done because he’s there to serve the people regardless of the despair he feels.

Don’t get it twisted, Steve is not perfect, but he constantly led by example, put the wants and needs of others before himself, was a hands on mentor, listened and supported others, and refused to leave anyone behind and/or die. He was always willing to be the only man fighting the battle and even to die for his beliefs.

And this man is called selfish by some.

Where as Tony consistently believed he knew what was best for others, was willing to let people die, was a shit mentor, mocked and ridiculed others, put his own feelings first, etc.

And this is seen as a leader???

Let’s not forget that dangerous tech he left to a MINOR after he died. Peter was so overwhelmed by the responsibility, he gave it to the first person who listened to him and who he believed to be responsible. This isn’t a condemnation of people. Again, his a literal minor—15 or 16. Who is overwhelmed about the shit stark left on his shoulders.

When old cap spoke to Sam, he gave AN ADULT, his shield. One with loved experiences and who knew how to handle complicated feelings. He knew what Sam was willing to handle and could handle.

And another thing: the fact that people were willing to go on the run with Steve says a lot. This is the second time Steve has been on the run and people, Sam and nat, were willing to follow him and assist (both times).

Tony couldn’t even get people to stay faithful to the legal accords. Rhodey said peace out as soon as cap returned. Nat abandoned Tony to join Steve. Vision questioned his life choices, and then went black to be with Wanda. And Peter didn’t know what the fuck was going on.

And Tony stans think he should’ve been leader based off of using his money for the avengers and giving them a place to crash.

LOL!

People want Wanda to apologize to Tony for invading his mind when he should apologize for her parents dying. If you’re a weapons manufacturer, there’s no such thing as believing only the “good guys” will use your weapons. You know your weapons could and will get into the wrong hands. And you also know that without war, you’d be out of a job. But, also the “good guys” are usually imperialist who fuck over other countries as they undermined these government structures to steal resources from them and other shit.

Just because starks stopped manufacturing weapons doesn’t mean he can escape accountability for what his weapons did to others.

Tony also ratted out that Clint had a family and was fine with them being jailed because they took the “wrong” side. Did he apologize to any of these people? The ones he had jailed and the ones who were forced to go on the run for a bill he supported, and then admitted was fucked up? (The same law he later broke twice.)

But, he’s a leader???

#pro captain america #pro steve rogers #steve rogers defence club #Steve rogers #Captain America #pro tony stark #pro iron man #anti tony stark #anti tony stans #anti iron man #for every post I see mistagged I’m mistagging my own #if I can’t peruse the Steve tags without anti mess you can’t do that with the Tony tag #:)#childish but I don’t care

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iidiotkid · 3 years

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Okay I kinda wanna talk about Tim because this is my account and I do what I want

On one hand, I understand why people hate him. He’s a Rich White Sad Boy, and we have plenty of those, but like,,,,,, I think Tim as a character is a pretty interesting move for the batman universe. At least in concept

He’s written to be a self-insert. It’s obvious. He’s a boy with a neglectful family life (which is far more common than the other batkids), who gets noticed by the heroes he adores and they think he’s smart, who has very little personality traits other than that, etc

But that’s exactly why I think he’s interesting. Because a lot of the things interrelate and if they had actually been explored it properly it would have been so cool.

To start off, the child neglect. This is a kid who has had limited social interaction his entire life. The two people who are supposed to love him the most didn’t care enough to even call most of the time, and most of the kids that talked to him would have been doing so because of his parents, how would that affect a person?

He, like many batfamily fans, fixates on a family situation he perceives as healthy. He follows them around, watches the Robins and their interactions with Batman, takes pictures of everything and keeps them in a scrapbook like someone would do their own family photos. He projects himself onto them, pretends like he’s a part of them, wishes that his own life could be like that...

But then something happens. Jason dies. The only true family he’s ever known, even if they never knew him, is fractured. Dick stops coming by as often, Bruce starts getting suicidal. Everything’s gone to shit and he’s desperate to fix it. He knows what’s wrong and, after a lot of convincing, he manages to get Bruce to let him correct it.

Which means he’s officially a part of the family he’s always wanted to be in! The childhood dream that he never fully dared to allow himself to wish for has come true! Sure, Bruce is still a little hesitant about him, but he’s officially Robin!

Now what?

Now he hits a problem. Everything he defines himself with are mostly just his status — he’s the heir to Drake Industries! — and that’s all. But now he isn’t really a Drake anymore, he’s spent more time with Bruce in the past few months than he has with his biological parents since he was a baby. So, who is he?

Robin, of course! He can’t call himself Bruce’s son, the man hadn’t adopted him and it felt a bit like he was betraying the Drakes by considering himself that, so he latched onto the only other thing present. He was Robin.

And this made him fear losing Robin even more. Because, if he wasn’t Robin, then who exactly was he? He knows he wasn’t chosen, that Dick and Jason were and he WASNT, he’s so painfully aware of it. Bruce didn’t want him, not really.

And that was fine, he was used to people he loved not wanting him around.

In fact, this situation was even better than the usual. At least Bruce was willing to deal with him! Of course, he doesn’t know how long that’ll last, so he tells himself he has to work hard. If he messes up too much then Bruce will realize he’s more trouble than he’s worth, just like every parental figure always realizes given enough time, and he can’t deal with that.

Obviously, he becomes a perfectionist. He had already been pretty obsessive, this was almost inevitable. Late nights poring over files, unfocused in his classes, but a he’s damn good Robin. And Bruce is noticing! He’s praising him for figuring things out so fast, he’s thanking him for his help!

But Tim is a growing boy, and growing boys need their sleep. Poor reflexes, stunted growth, gradually declining ability to think... all bad things when you’re Robin. And Bruce is noticing, because of course he is he’s BATMAN, but he hasn’t said anything yet so it’s fine and really Tim can just deal with it —.

Enter one Dick Grayson. He sees this kid take a pretty bad blow in a fight, sees this kid in the Robin suit nearly die while he’s unable to do anything, and all he can think about is Jason dying alone in that warehouse while he was unable to do anything in space. He couldn’t save Jason. He can save Tim.

Visits from Bludhaven become more common despite all the tensions between Bruce and him. Tim doesn’t know why Dick is suddenly so interested in him, hardly anyone ever is, but he is more than happy to accept it for now.

Dick takes him out to see Gotham, not as vigilantes but as civilians. Tim has never seen Gotham like this, not really. His parents had never been all that interested in showing him, and school field trips are always spent bitching and moaning about how boring they were or stressing out over worksheets, so he hadn’t had a chance to really enjoy Gotham for what it was. A gorgeous place despite the circumstances.

He starts spending more time out in Gotham simply for himself, even when Dick wasn’t around. He starts meeting new people. He learns that he’s a listener. Watching people talking about things they loved, seeing the way their faces light up and their hands move around wildly in their excitement, it becomes one of his favorite pastimes.

And, of course, they make life sound like so much fun. He starts doing even more. He visits the arboretum, the planetarium, the zoo, he loves them all. Nature was so gorgeous, and in Gotham it was such a rarity to see any of it that every time he visited he could feel the breath catch. He wants to make Gotham better. He knows not everyone can afford to go to these kinds of places all the time, so the only solution is to try and better the city.

He’s no longer Robin for the sake of being Batman’s Robin, he’s Robin to help Gotham.

He’s doing it purely to be helpful, because he genuinely likes helping people now. He’s seen their smiles, he’s heard their stories, and he wants to protect them.

But he can’t do that if he keeps working himself half to death (literally), so he starts allowing himself some proper rest. He is surprised to learn he’s actually doing BETTER as Robin now. He’s a better fighter and a better detective, sure, but he’s also more concerned about collateral damage in fights and he’s better with victims.

And Bruce notices. Of course he does, he’s Batman, but he doesn’t say anything again. Tim is doing well, and he was usually quiet about most things so he can leave him be.

Or, at least, that was the plan until a particularly adamant Dick drags him out of his brooding to talk to Tim. Bruce, however awkward and stilted, asks how his day went.

So Tim tells him that he doesn’t have to do that, that they don’t have to force a relationship. They were Batman and Robin, and that was enough for him, they didn’t need to be Bruce and Tim, too, if Bruce didn’t want it to be that way.

Bruce’s breath catches just like Tim’s does when he sees the stars and the plants and the animals as they truly are. And then Bruce slowly draws him into a hug, it’s painfully awkward and a little uncomfortable with all their armor, but then Bruce says that he does want it. That he wants Tim.

And Tim realizes then, with his face buried in Bruce’s cape and promises of a better relationship with Bruce, that he isn’t Robin. Because Robin was little more than an idea.

He was just Tim. And maybe Tim was enough.

#man i hope this makes sense #anyways dc write tim well challenge #actually write everyone well challenge #dc has such good concepts and for what #tim drake #dick grayson #batman #batfam #batdad #batfamily #bruce wayne #robin #red robin #nightwing #is this a fic?#i’m counting it as a fic

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rason-rodd · 3 years

Text

All The Time We Need - Jason Todd x Fem!Reader (NSFW)

Summary: Reader and Jason meet again after two years being apart and reconnect with their long lost love.

Warning : Angst, Fluff, Smut

Author’s note: A OS definitely inspired by my 2-years long hiatus and that somewhat acknowledges it. It was almost cathartic writing it and allowed me to reconnect with Jason on a writing scale. You can read it as a sequel to “Summer Love and Swimming Pool” or not. Some moments are a bit too cheesy to my taste but I hope you’ll enjoy it nevertheless. NSFW Part is at the end. You can skip that part if you want to.

You actually realise Time flies when you take time to acknowledge it. And sometimes acknowledging is like getting buried under a mountain of sand and feeling each grain slowly chocking you and reminding you there is no escaping. The sands of Time cannot be stopped, nor can they be shoveled. They run and slip through your fingers like dust in the wind and the tighter you try to grasp them the faster they go. And when they’re gone, there is no catching them back. That’s why Time is scary. Because no matter what you do, it won’t allow you to go back or to put an end to it. And it will certainly not allow you to forget about it either. Time will pave your life until the day you die with a constant reminder that, unlike it, you’re not eternal. And the saddest thing is it doesn’t care about what you think of it. And yet, it seemed like Jason Todd had managed to tell Time to go fuck itself. “How long has it been?”

He hadn’t changed a bit. Looking as handsome as ever. Always and eternally sporting the same disheveled short black hair and the same mischievous yet tortured blue eyes, eyes that had put you in more trouble than you could remember. “Two years or so … I don’t know.” All you could remember was a passionate summertime infatuation that had burnt your body and your heart night and day like a hot and dazzling sun. A fading yet intense memory you secretly cherished and replayed in period of loneliness and that you couldn’t seem to be able to replace on the timeline of your life. “Still so beautiful, I see.” You scoffed and he chuckled. “What?” “You haven’t changed a bit, have you?” He scratched his head; arm muscles compressed in a leather jacket à la Jason that made you wonder how he could bear wearing such a light jacket in such freezing weather. “I tend to believe constancy is a quality.” You goggled at his smile, childish, adorable yet naturally so seductive. The same smile that used to make your legs shake and turn to jell-o. “I didn’t know you were back in Gotham.” “Right back at you. Last time I heard of you, you were in this little town … Hopletown, was it?” “Appleton.” He corrected. “Looks like Timbo talks about me in my absence.” “You’re his brother. Of course, he talks about you, just like everyone else in your family.” Judging by his signature small crooked smile on his face he seemed touched by your words, taking even time to ponder over them. Did the family really think of him in his absence?

Shivering, you tightened your wool coat around you, attempting to prevent the cold wind to infiltrate under the cloth and steal your body heat, as you let Jason think about what you had just said. But your reaction didn’t go unnoticed and it managed to pull him out of his train of thoughts. “Do you want to go somewhere warmer? We could have something to drink, catch on. I’m sure you got plenty to tell.” “Not plenty but I could use a hot tea.” You confessed, already imagining the spicy smell of cinnamon and chai in your nostrils and the hot steam caressing your cold face. “Amazing.” He grinned, genuinely happy and excited, a bit like a little boy at a toy store, and lowered your beanie to properly cover your ice-cold reddened ears. That gesture got you confused for a small second but it was so sweet and caring you eventually smiled. Ah Todd, always the overprotective type I see.

***

“So, what are you doing in Gotham City? I thought you wanted to ‘travel the world Dora The Explorer-style and get the hell out of this cesspool’?” He quoted you and your genuine chuckle made him smile but only briefly as you gained back your seriousness in a matter of seconds.

He could tell you were not the same girl he used to date two summers ago. You had changed, matured. You had become a woman, a woman who seemed to struggle with responsibilities so heavy they could crush her at any second. You looked tired, weary… sad even. The cheeky light in you was gone. And he wanted to know why. Not out of curiosity but to help you. “Well, I did travel and it was awesome, like a dream come true. But I guess we always wake up from dreams eventually.” You looked down at your tea, looking at your pale reflection in the hot water, melancholia hitting you like a train. “My mother got sick and, well, her savings were not enough to pay for all the medical care so … let’s say I had to swap my backpack for a satchel… I work at Wayne Enterprises now. Bruce hired me, out of pity I suppose.” “I’m sure it wasn’t out of pity.” You shrugged and Jason grabbed your hand and you looked up at him. “And I’m sorry about your mother. I know how it’s like to …” “Do you still think about us?” You abruptly cut him short, not willing to keep talking about your personal issues or to plunge Jason back in dark memories that you know were very hard for him to handle. Sure, you could have chosen another question, another topic of conversation but the thing was that those words were niggling at you since the moment you two broke up. “I mean do you happen to think about what happened between us?”

Jason didn’t answer at first, more out of surprise than out of hesitation because there was none. There was just one answer to that question. Of course. Of course he had thought about you all over those two years. Of course he had thought about what happened, about the moments spent with you – however ephemeral they had been -, about that love he had felt and had never learned to completely erase despite the women who had entered and exited his life. Of course there had been nights in which he had replayed the lustful burning memories of you in his arms, against him, against his naked body. Of course was the answer. But not the answer he gave you. “Come with me.” He forced you to get up and slammed a fifty-dollar bill against the table, not caring about the hot chocolate he hadn’t finished or the blueberry muffin you had barely touched. “But … the change.” You tried to protest. “Fuck the change. I want to show you something.”

***

Out of all the places in Gotham, you never thought he would have brought you here. “Why are we here, Jason?” It was an ancient building, far from the fancy city centre and only a few blocks away from Crime Alley. Dilapidated, covered in colorful yet ugly graffiti, this place looked liked a landmark for drug dealers and junkies and it was an understatement to say that, without Jason’s company, it would have normally made you feel unsafe and uncomfortable. “I grew up here, before Bruce took me in.” You glanced at Jason who was staring at the place with both disgust and melancholia. “I’ve always hated that place. But it was home. And I guess it made me… I guess that is because of that place that I somehow became the man I am today… I mean, if Jason Todd hadn’t grow up here with a junkie mother and a lousy father he would have never met Brue Wayne and never became …” He stopped, on purpose, you could tell it. “Even if I hate to, I come back here when I want to think of my past, when I’m looking for a reason to keep on fighting. This place is like my temple, a memento of who I am. Damn, you must think I’m crazy.” “ No, not at all… ” You smiled and put your hand on his arm to reassure him. “Just very Romantic for the bad boy of the Wayne family.” You teased him, knowing perfectly that literature always been Jason’s hobbyhorse and that the whole bad boy thing was a persona, a thick armour he had made to protect himself. “Blame Alfred. He’s the one who made me ready Wordsworth.” He joked, appreciating the small banter. “Follow me.” You took the warm hand he offered you and followed him inside the decaying building, minding your step and trying to ignore the dirt and the potential rats.

Once on the third floor, Jason pushed a rackety wooden door that cracked and squeaked on its hinges and you entered what once was his house. “You grew up here?” You asked only to fill the heavy void caused by this dreadful place. “It was the living room. Used to hide under the table there when my parents were fighting.”

You looked around you, trying to imagine a small Jason living in here. You always knew about his crappy childhood but there is a huge difference between what you had imagined based on the stories Jason had told you in the intimacy of your bedroom and this place. “You asked me why we’re here.” You turned around and spotted Jason knelt on the dusty wooden floor, a small dusty shoebox that he had just taken from under a floorboard between his hands. “I’ve had this since I was a child. Used to keep the things I loved most in it. Somehow, even after I left this place, I never could take it away from here.” He handed it to you and you slowly opened it, careful not to drop it. You could tell this box was important to Jason.

The content left you silent and you sat on the floor near Jason to study it. “I never really opened it. I don’t like getting stuck in the past. It terrifies me.” You frowned, thinking about all the nightmares, all the anxiety attacks he used to have back in the days you were together. “I never showed it to anyone either but hopefully that’ll answer the question you asked me in that coffee shop.” The question? You had forgotten about it, way too overwhelmed by the sudden solemnity of this moment. “Never?” “You’re my first. You should be proud” He tried to joke to lighten the mood and it worked for a couple of seconds. Then, you saw it, among a dog toy, a broken necklace, a batarang and other small tokens. A photo of you two kissing and smiling. A Polaroid you had personally taken on the day when Tim had offered you the camera to illustrate your travel book. “You kept it.” You declared in a whisper. “I told you. I keep the things I love most in that box.” You stared at Jason, at the cracks of melancholia and the vulnerability in his beautiful blue eyes he allowed only a few people to see. “Of course I thought of you over the years.” You were not the cheesy romantic type. Jason was - something rooted to his love for gothic literature and poetry you supposed. But that sincere and pure confession got you all … flushed? bothered? You couldn’t really pinpoint the feeling but you could feel the shaky warmth spreading in your body, now paralyzed by the beauty of that moment. “Did you … think of me?”

If Time could stop, you would have chosen this moment to stop it. Here, now, away from your stressful life and its issues, away from all fears and all pains, with Jason and only him, forgetting about the past you’ll never be able to change or the future that vows to be uncertain and scary, thinking about what truly matters, now. “What do you think?” He chuckled and you saw his hand slightly twitch, as if he was hesitating to do something. And so you took it in yours and shared an umpteenth intimate look only he could read. “Sometimes I wish I’d never left.” Meaning, sometimes I wish I would have stayed and be with you. “Trust me, princess. You made the right choice. Your life would have been miserable with me.” He tried to reassure you, in vain. After all, he could barely convince himself? “More miserable than the one I have right now? I seriously doubt it, Jay.” You frowned and finally got up, leaving Jason’s box on the ground, to watch at the sunset and its red golden rays from the shattered window. “What do you think would have happened had I stayed?” You had your ideas; small little ones of pure love, happiness and bliss that Jason would have managed to lock in that little box of his. “I have a better question, Y/N. What do you think can happen right now?” He was towering you, expecting an answer, waiting as he was gazing at your skin glowing under the soft light of the sun and at your shining eyes. “You tell me, Todd.” This sentence echoed in Jason’s head as a call.

And so his thumb brushed your cold cheek and you looked up at his face, your eyes glued to his features observing them and all the small details you hadn’t noticed before. A little scar thin as a needle on his right brow and a much bigger one, an invisible one that you could see in his eyes, the scar left by all the losses and the pains he had gone through recently. Roy, Bizarro, Artemis. Maybe Jason had changed as well after all. Maybe there was no secret to stop time. But he didn’t let you ponder over this and gently pressed his lips on yours.

He needed that. He had thought about it all day and the truth was, you had too. You welcomed his kiss without hesitation or second thoughts and came to press your small body against his - which seemed so tall and strong in comparison to yours – to instinctively look for safety and protection. “I missed you, princess.” He whispered close to your mouth for a brief second before capturing your full lips with his again. “I missed you too.” You confessed, hands over his hard chest, feeling his heart beat loudly under your palms. Jason was holding you close now, his arms tightly circled around your form as if he was scared for you to leave, scared to be alone again. His fingers weaving in your hair, his head buried in the nape of your neck, he was pecking your delicate skin, smelling the sweet and heady perfume, glad it was exactly like the one he remembered. “Damn, Y/N. You’re still driving me crazy.” He murmured as he allowed his hands to slide in your coat and under your jumper to caress your bare back, awakening a cheekiness that you thought was long gone. “I tend to believe constancy is a quality.” You quoted him.

***

As soon as the door to your apartment slammed shut, your coat dropped to the floor and with hasty hands, Jason threw your beanie across the room, showing an excitement you had almost forgotten. It almost knocked an old crystal vase over but he couldn’t care less. He had waited long enough. Two years to be precise and he couldn’t wait a second longer. “Bedroom?” He asked between two hungry kisses that were making you almost suffocating against him. “ At the end of the corridor.” You whispered, already breathless, as you managed to finally get rid of his leather jacket. “Okay.” He suddenly grabbed you to hoist you up with incredible ease, hands under your ass, squeezing it on purpose. A lustful yet cheerful action that made you yelp in surprise. “I’m already making you scream? Perfect.” He declared with an amused smile as he rushed towards the bedroom, with you in his arms, your legs wrapped around his waist, his lips devouring yours. “Wrong door.” You said as he tried to open the bathroom. “Fuck.” You giggled and very soon your body finally bounced on your bed as it landed on the soft mattress.

You attempted to sit down to admire Jason but before you could do anything the hasty young man was already on top of you, right in between your legs, his lips already kissing your hot belly as his hands were slowly pulling up your jumper above your lace-covered breasts. That’s when your first moan finally escaped your mouth. “God. I missed that sound.” Jason mumbled against your shivering skin as he cupped and squeezed your round breasts. “Do it again.” He demanded, his tongue licking you up until it reached your cleavage. “Jason.” You moaned his name, feeling a very specific humid warmth forming in between your legs as you fingers were struggling to get rid of his green t-shirt. He cursed and knelt on the bed to take off your jumper that he carelessly tossed on the nightstand. It knocked the lamp and the radio alarm clock to the ground with a loud clinking noise. “Can you stop breaking my stuff?” You joked and he apologized with another amused bright smile. “I’m sorry, princess” “Are you? Show me how much.” You declared with an audacious confidence you hadn’t seen in a while. “Yes, ma’am.” Jason winked and immediately unbuttoned your jeans to pull them down along with your panties, revealing your wet and rosy womanhood begging for his attention. He sighed and took a deep breath when he saw it, glad to rediscover that little part of you. Slowly, his calloused fingers went to caress it, making you draw a sharp breath as your fingers tightened around the covers. You didn’t want him to tease you too long and you somewhat you know he wouldn’t. Not today. He was too excited and needy for that. And so were you in a way judging by the certain frustration that made you mewl when Jason’s expert finger slowly entered you while his thumb came to tickle your swollen clit. You wanted him now but you had to admit you had missed his fingers down there, the same way you had missed everything about him. Which reminded you there was something you had to do. “Let’s even the odds, shall we? I want to see how you handle such a sweet torture.” “Sweet torture?” He repeated with a cute chuckle as you unbuckled his leather belt. “How am I torturing you, Y/N?” You unzipped his black trousers and immediately plunged you hand in his underwear to gently grab his already hard cock, making Jason curse even more crudely than before. You chuckled and free his shaft from his boxers to jerk him off. He was as thick and long as you remembered. You bit your lower lip, impatient to feel him inside you. “Like what you see?” “Shut up.” You knelt on the mattress and immediately took his tip between your lips to suck it like a lollipop, enjoying the taste of his bitter pre-cum on your tongue and the sound of Jason’s sharp breath in your ears. “Damn it, princess.” He managed to say with half lidded eyes. You licked his penis with a grin before finally welcoming it in your mouth with a lustful moan. How much you had missed it. “You know. I think I get what you mean by sweet torture now.” Jason confessed as he weaved his fingers in your soft hair, torn apart by two ideas: one, let you continue your amazing blow job. Two, fuck you like he never did before. But you did not listen and started bobbing your head the way you knew he loved, taking his dick as deep as you could without gagging around him. “Fucking hell, Y/N” Jason groaned as he grabbed your head between his hands to accompany your pace. “You’re fucking amazing.” Then, his hand gently slapped your ass and he bent over to kiss it with a loving smile that was swallowed by another growl of his as his abs violently tensed with pleasure. “Alright, enough.” He pushed you flat on your back and placed himself between your legs again. He kissed your folds and licked your slit to wet it even more than it already was to finally lingered on your clit that he sucked eagerly, forcing a guttural crying moan out of your tightly sealed lips. Damn, that tongue! “I thought you said enough.” You complained, your voice as low as a whisper.

Jason chuckled and smiled brightly before he eventually knelt in between your spread thighs. “God, how gorgeous you are.” He declared as he tapped his hard cock against your reddened lips, a cheeky gesture whose sole purpose was to make you beg. You knew it. “You want this?” “Fuck, Jay.” You grumbled, moving your hips vigorously against his shaft, looking for a way to finally welcome it inside you. But Jason ignored your whim and bent over your body. “You want me?” His face was so close to yours you could feel his hot breath caressing your lips. “Yes.” You murmured. “I want you, Ja…” He did not let you finish your sentence and caught your lips with a burning eagerness, his hand around his cock guiding it inside you, making you moan in his mouth. “Fuck.” Jason growled between his gritted teeth as he felt himself slowly sinking inside of you. “I almost forgot you felt so tight.” “ I almost forgot you were so big.” You cleared your voice, an inexplicable mechanism to relax and allow his cock to fully enter and stretch you. “I know. Sorry.” He winced, adjusting his position on top of you to admire how beautiful you were around his penis and how perfect you pussy was for him. “Damn. I don’t know if I’ll last long, princess.” Jason admitted with a shiver and you cried out when he suddenly pulled out to push himself back inside of you with one long exquisite move. “That’s alright. We’ll do it again.”

Those last words made Jason grin in a way he had never done before as he was genuinely happy that you didn’t want this to be a one-time thing, a casual lay to remember the old good days. So he immediately took a nice pace that quickened after each new thrust and you let your hands caress his smooth chest from his strong pectorals down to his divine abs and the chiselled V below his navel, finding him simply handsome. Then you nudged his rear with your ankles, pressing his hips closer to yours to take him deeper inside of you, and started moaning his name again, a strong wave of pleasure forming in your core, ready to drown you. “Jay!” His mouth met your neck and sucked on the thin skin with ardour. “Are you gonna cum for me, princess?” That was too much to handle. “Yeah” You cried out, tears of bliss watering your eyes. “Cum for me then.” He didn’t have to say it twice. You dug your nails in his back and screamed loudly as your walls clenched around tightly his thick cock. “That’s it, princess.” He said as you kept calling his name on and on, sending him closer to a most awaited orgasm that he eventually reached and let explode in you under the shape of a loud growled “fuck” and beads of white seed right inside of you. “Y/N” Jason groaned between his gritted teeth as he thrust hard and deep in you for the last time, his sweaty forehead against yours. “Jay!” You shouted again while clawing at his back painfully enough to make him wince and hiss. Then he stopped moving, exhausted and breathless just like you, and watched you sink in the mattress trying to catch your breath. He caressed your hair as you both slowly came down from cloud nine. A kiss on your nose and he whispered. “You’re okay?” and in spite of the silliness of the question you nodded. “Never been better.”

Your lips found each other again and Jason let himself lie down on you, placing his head on your breasts, listening to your hearts pounding and to your loud ragged breaths. “I missed you.” He whispered and he held you body against his. “I missed you too.” You repeated as you planted a kiss in his wet dark hair. “Did you have to keep your jeans on?” The question escaped with a laugh and Jason chuckled. “You know me. Didn’t want to waste any time.” He managed to gather the little energy he had left to sit down and finally remove his trousers as he thought he would feel more comfortable without them. “Oops. I think I broke your clock.” He grimaced as he noticed you the broken device on the floor and the flickering numbers flashing up endlessly on the screen. “I don’t care.” You said as you pulled Jason back against you. “We’ve got all the time we need.”

#Jason Todd #red hood #jason todd x reader #fanfiction #one shot

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lovelyirony · 4 years

Text

the much anticipated second part for the amnesia-related fic.

A wedding ring.

This doesn’t mean that he and Tony are married except that he hasn’t seen Tony with a wedding ring and he hasn’t mentioned a wife and he doesn’t sound like he has a wife and if Rhodey-if Jim had a wife, then wouldn’t he know about her? Wouldn’t they have met by now? He may not know Tony yet, but he doesn’t think that he would be that cruel.

“Colonel Rhodes-”

“Friday, don’t,” Jim says, swatting at the air. “What-why did you hide that from me?”

“Sir believed it would be best,” Friday answers, tone almost quieter. “He...wasn’t sure that you would understand.”

“I don’t understand,” he says. “Why would I marry him of all people? He’s not exactly my type.”

“Since I am a learning program, I cannot say for sure. Humans do a lot of illogical things.”

He’s trying to wrap his head around it and avoid Tony at the same time.

Friday won’t let him see any wedding pictures, not until he remembers more.

Even though he’s been (mostly) successful at avoiding Tony for about a week and a half, the man is still so nice.

He’s still operating under the assumption that Jim has no idea that they’re married, and he does stuff like leave out a cup of coffee and offer breakfast up or ask if he wants pizza for dinner.

Jim reads too much into it.

And he doesn’t know why, because it’s not like anything has really changed, except for the fact that Tony won’t call him Rhodey.

Jim gave him permission to, saw how much it killed him with every correction and every reminder. Told him “you can call me Rhodey, if you want.”

And he doesn’t.

Tony never does.

He still almost says it, but Jim is quicker on the tongue, and he doesn’t make a move to try to push any memories at all.

(Even though he remembers how happy Tony was to hear that memory about grocery shopping and Dum-E’s code source.)

He does want to remember. He wants to remember why he apparently married Tony and was genuine about it, why Pepper and him are best friends and never were anything more, why he’s...why he’s so different from what he wanted.

Tony knows that Jim’s acting differently. He’s not sure why. He’s not sure he wants to know why, because that might complicate everything.

And he doesn’t want another thing to be wrong. Everyone’s walking on eggshells around him except for the one damn person that probably should be, but Rhodey’s never been good at following rules. (But he’s good at fooling people.)

Pepper talks to Tony a lot. Asks him how he’s doing, if there’s anything she can do.

Repair someone’s memory is a little bit outside of her area of expertise.

“It’ll be okay,” she says, putting her tiny hand over his. “Things will work out.”

They both know that in Tony’s life, luck has never been quite what it seems. Or existent at all, at times.

Ironically, it’s their anniversary of the wedding when Jim remembers something else. It actually comes in the form of looking in the fridge and not finding his apples.

“Quit leaving honey-crisp off of the list just because you don’t like them you asshole,” he calls to Tony.

Tony almost yelps.

“Out of everything in your life and that’s what you remember? Your stupidly sweet apples?”

“Are you gonna get them?”

“Why don’t you come with me?” Tony asks, “just so that you can get your apples and maybe get out of the house for once.”

“Hmph. Fine,” Jim answers. “Where’s my coat?”

“Uh...” Tony trails off, trying to find the words. “Third peg on the...right, I think?”

“You’ve known me for years, and you don’t know where my coat is?”

Rhodey is always the one to hang up his coat, and then put his arms out for Tony’s.

“To be fair, I am important and fancy and a big deal,” Tony scoffs. “Come on, go get your coat and then I’m going to show you what horrible things you buy from the store.”

“It’s not that bad. And what, you don’t like good apples?”

“As sour as can be, sourpatch. As sour as can be.”

Grocery shopping with Tony is...interesting. He didn’t think it would take so long.

“This is why you don’t usually come,” Tony teases him. “I take so long and you end up sitting in the car and cursing at Pepper or Happy about how much time I spend dedicated to snack-judging.”

“And I put up with that?”

“You do,” Tony says, grabbing the cart. “Because you love me and you deal with a lot worse from me.”

“Like what?”

“Best not to talk about it,” Tony says. “We’re in public after all, honey.”

“Ugh, boo,” Rhodey teases. “Give me the list. I bet I can speed-run this.”

“How? Technically, you don’t think you’ve ever been to this store before!” Tony exclaims with a gigantic, shit-eating grin.

“Way to rub it in you bastard,” he says with a laugh. “Now come on, I wanna see what kind of salad you think we’re gonna get.”

“Not you thinking you’re going to be eating junk food,” Tony sighs.

“I lost my memory!”

“That would’ve worked, like, two weeks ago. Now I know better.”

Grocery shopping is...fun. They make fun of foods and different products, and Tony shows him which things he might like.

“I like...I like fruit salad?”

“Yes, yes you do Rhodey-dear,” Tony says. “Your favorite thing in the world for fruit.”

“Seems suspicious.”

“You’ll have to try it again, then.”

Rhodey watches him as they’re shopping. He’s easy to be around, honestly. He has that sort of energy that makes you feel like he’s just happy to be in that moment.

Tony also has very questionable taste in everything.

“Quinoa?”

“What? You’ve eaten it before! It’s not your least favorite thing that I’ve cooked?”

“How is it not? Is it because I’m old?”

“No, not because you’re old,” Tony scowls. “When you’d come back from the service, you’d eat literally anything I put in front of you. I once gave you a block of cheese and you just sat there. Eating it.”

“There’s no way I did that.”

“You did! Ask Pepper, she has a picture of it!”

He goes back to quiet after that, remembering the picture.

Jim isn’t even sure he wants to bring it up. He’s not even sure if he could love Tony again, and somehow that thought makes his head hurt.

He knows that apparently, he fell in love once.

So he needs answers.

Jim had talked to his parents, but he hadn’t really had an opportunity to talk about anything important. Try as he had to get more information out of them, they weren’t giving much up, except for parts about his military achievements and funny stories that he’s written to them about.

When he gets back home and he sees Mama, she knows.

“Come here baby,” she says, putting him into her arms. “Let me answer your questions.”

“Why him?”

Mama laughs, grinning up at him from her place on the couch.

“You reacted like this when you first started rooming together, too. I was worried that I’d be involved in a court case for attempted murder!”

“And you weren’t?”

“No,” Mama answers. “Instead, I get no phone call from you for three weeks, until the day before your holiday break started, and you told me that you were bringing who you used to call ‘the biggest nuisance since fruit flies’ home to Thanksgiving.”

“Why did I...why did I bring him?”

“I didn’t get that answered until he fell asleep,” she says. “I’m making you some coffee, alright dear?”

“Okay, so long as I get an answer.”

“So impatient,” she mutters as she makes her way to the kitchen, Jim following.

He watches how easily his mom pours the coffee, and remembers in a brief flash that Tony always would bring the fancy, flavored creamer to the holiday events.

“Oh come on,” Tony said. “You have gotten too used to my kindness, and there’s no reason to stop being kind. Besides, remember last year when you nearly cried because I bought creamer from the store? Yeah, not having a repeat of that.”

“And would that be so bad?” he teased Tony, wrapping an arm around his waist, and-

He blinks.

That was...that was definitely a new kind of memory.

“James, are you alright?” His mother is looking at him, and maybe she knows, maybe she doesn’t know that he just remembered something. He’s honestly not sure.

“Uh, yeah. Fine. I’m good.”

Mama looks across the room, smiling.

“He was a timid little thing when he got here. Fixed up the washing machine when it broke, just in time. Nearly wore a suit to dinner, said you didn’t tell him what kind of ‘casual’ we were going for...”

He snorts as he slowly remembers that one.

“What do you mean you didn’t mean a suit?!” Tony had wailed, gripping Rhodey’s shirt. “You said I had to dress nice!”

“I meant literally anything but your Black Sabbath shirt!”

“Why would I have worn my Black Sabbath shirt? Your mom would probably think I was a Satanist!”

They both look at each other for a moment, and Rhodey’s the first one to break and laugh.

“Listen you idiot, it won’t be so bad. We can just ditch the coat, ditch the tie, and you’ll be...okay. A bit nicer than most of us, but hey. That’s what I get for not telling you that suits are weird.”

“Suits are not weird, you’re just uneducated in what is sophisticated,” Tony says, turning his nose up as Rhodey rolls his eyes.

“Oh yeah, sure, because knowing which one is the dessert spoon is going to help me save people abroad. My bad.”

Tony looks back at him, and his heart skips a beat. It does. Really, it does.

It almost feels like someone’s reading back to him what he already knows at this point.

His mom squeezes his hand, smiling.

“You remember at least some of it, don’t you?”

“Well...uh, yeah? I-I do.”

“Does Tony know that you know that you’re...married?”

“No,” Rhodey says. “I know some, but not enough.”

“Give him a chance,” she says. “And get back home, I’m sure he’s missing you.”

Rhodey embraces his mother, and prepares for the drive home.

Being missed is a weird concept to deal with.

He also did not exactly think of that. So he’s currently driving back and checked his phone to seven missed calls from Tony, three from Pepper, and one text from Happy that simply reads “lol ur dead hahaha good luckkkkk”

Well shit.

Tony, understandably is pissed and scared and a tad upset.

Not a tad.

“Where were you?” He says as soon as Rhodey appears back in the kitchen. Tony’s hands wander close, and he almost leans in.

Almost.

“I was visiting my parents,” he responds. “Sorry, forgot to text.”

“Please remember next time, your-well, Tony’s annoying when you leave,” Pepper says.

(Okay Rhodey doesn’t know how they got away with this for so long, it’s really, really obvious that they’ve been covering it up.)

“I will,” Rhodey says. “Did I miss anything?”

“I’ve elected that we’re going to cook tonight,” Tony declares. “I am absolutely sick to death of takeout, and I’m pretty sure that with your lack of knowledge on recipes now, I have you beat in the kitchen.”

“I can still read recipes, you dumbass. Besides, I just remembered your stupid ‘bake’ hack for your stupid casserole dish, so...”

“Out of everything, and that’s the thing you remember today?!”

“Well, I also remembered that apparently you wore a suit to my house for Thanksgiving!”

Tony stops.

“What else you remember from that, or was it just that?”

He doesn’t want to say anything in front of Pepper, doesn’t want to say anything just yet.

“I remember that you were weird about your suit!”

Tony deflates a bit, but still smiles.

God, he looks gorgeous.

Rhodey blinks. Shakes his head out of the thought.

“So. What are we cooking?”

Tony and cooking is a very interesting concept because it shouldn’t work.

He never stops moving, can lose interest quickly, and Rhodey would think that he could burn water.

But he doesn’t. Tony hums along to music, and he tells him all about his favorite songs and why.

It’s not any rock music, any heavy metal.

“I don’t listen to that all the time,” Tony says. “You always think I do!”

“Oh right, because someone who personally has Angus Young’s number just casually isn’t someone who listens to the band all the time, sure,” Rhodey says sarcastically.

Tony grins, and it’s probably the best damned thing he’s seen all day.

His heart zings at the realization that Tony smiling is what makes him smile now, what makes him want to stay and learn so much more about how they came to be, what they’ve done together.

Dinner is fun. Tony tells him all about college and what they used to do, and what Rhodey had done.

Memories are coming back easier.

“You totally emailed the professor really petty responses!” Tony cries, laughing.

“It wasn’t that petty,” Rhodey said, huffing. “He was an asshole anyway, he hated whenever we would come late because we wanted coffee, and your order was too complicated!”

“It wasn’t that complicated!”

“Oh I’m sorry, them having it written down behind the register for when you come in?”

“Oh, like they didn’t have a description of you.”

“Yeah, as your long-suffering companion,” Rhodey teases.

“You’ve always been,” Tony says. “Because you’re the best.”

Rhodey stops stirring the pot for a moment.

“Rhodey? What is it?”

“I...”

Tony stands there, grinning. He’s nervously fidgeting, and it’s his move to say the vows.

“You know, I wasn’t ever sure you’d be up to marrying someone like me,” Tony confesses. “Especially since I almost burned down our dorm room one time.”

“Wasn’t just one time,” Rhodey teases. “But carry on.”

“You loser,” Tony says. “Even now, interrupting my heartfelt moment.”

There’s a ripple of laughter from the small crowd that’s gathered. Rhodey smiles at him, feels tears prick up around his eyes.

“But I knew that I loved you ever since you would always buy my favorite ramen even though you hated it, and you were the one to get the pizza when I was sad. I knew I wanted the chance of seeing you every day, coming home to you at the end of the day. You’re home, Rhodey. You’re it. No one else could ever possibly hold a candle compared to you.”

Rhodey startles, looking at Tony.

“I...I remember. I remember!”

“Remember what?” Tony asks cautiously.

(He can’t be let down. Not again.)

“You smashed cake in my face at our wedding!” Rhodey yells. “And we got married! We got married! Where the fuck is my ring?”

Tony laughs, scooping Rhodey into a hug.

“I can’t believe you remember.”

“Well I was bound to at some point,” Rhodey says. “I can be smart, doofus.”

“Don’t call me ‘doofus’ during an emotional outburst you absolute nimrod!”

“I’ll call my husband whatever I want,” he teases, “although I still wanna know where my ring is.”

“Come with me and get it,” Tony says. “I hid them in my room, just in case.”

It’s all coming back, the steps they take, the way that Tony supports him as he moves slower.

Iron Man, for one. War Machine the next. The dates they went on, the proposal.

The rings are simple. They’re also not wedding rings.

The class rings.

Rhodey remembers getting them, remembers getting his initials and Tony’s on the inside, remembers how Tony made some “adjustments” after they received them.

“You know that you got me,” Tony had told him.

It slides on, and it feels right. Feels like something was missing.

He looks up at Tony, smiling.

“Show me the pictures, Tony.”

Pepper walks in to find Rhodey absolutely terrorizing Tony about the decor choices from the reception.

“So I agreed with red and gold? I had no problem with it?”

“Well, I did do some major convincing, so...”

“What does that mean?!”

"You’ll remember later and be sad,” Pepper says. “Or happy. But please don’t tell me if you remember it.”

“You loved the color scheme,” Tony says. “Because you love me!”

“Now I am doubting,” Rhodey declares. “I loved you enough to have those colors?”

“You lost a bet, Boss,” Friday interjects. “That’s why there were those themes.”

“Friday,” Tony whines. “Why snitch on your creator like this?”

“I am not programmed to have loyalty, Sir.”

Rhodey laughs, taking Tony’s hand in his.

“Well, I guess I’ll still love you. Even if our wedding theme was weird.”

“It wasn’t that weird!”

It takes about another month before all of the memories are all back to normal, and in that time Rhodey learns (and relearns) a couple of things:

1.) The best feeling in the world is waking up to Tony, who sleeps very lightly and also wacked Rhodey in the face a total of ten times. (That’s not a new thing, he remembers.)

2.) He special-orders peppermint-flavored coffee creamer.

3.) Tony was lying when he said that Rhodey’s new favorite movie was The Goonies.

(He mostly forgave him for that one.)

#lovelyirony writes #rhodeytony #ironhusbands #part two!#rhodey has amnesia #tony stark #rhodey #pepper potts #also yes the use of 'jim' in the beginning and then transitioning to rhodey a bit is intentional #sorry if it is a bit confusing but i like how i formatted that one so that's what we're getting with this one #i hope you all like it!

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