#the mad ones incorrect quotes

[behold-the-brave-battalion-17]

Kelly: I’m not a fan of country but I do love how male country singers are like “I love fishing and my truck” and female country singers are like “I’m going to kill my husband”.

#kelly manning #kelly the mad ones #the mad ones #the mad ones musical #the mad ones incorrect quotes

[whatever-color-of-the-rainbow]

Kelly: Stop being boring. You’re banned from saying no.

Sam: But that’s my catchphrase!

Kelly: Make a new one!

#source: solitaire (alice oseman) #kelly manning #kelly the mad ones #samantha brown #sam the mad ones #the mad ones #the mad ones musical #the mad ones incorrect quotes

[cod-dump]

Ghost: Did you know male bees die after mating?

Price: I didn’t know that, actually

Ghost: That’s their whole life. Honey, nut, Cheerio

Price: … get the fuck out of my office

#he’s mad because that one he actually found funny #call of duty #cod mwii #modern warfare ii #simon ghost riley #john price #incorrect quotes

[hisbucky]

Eddie: We need to make a pact. Bobby: What are you talking about? Eddie: A pact. A non-aggression pact. Bobby: Now, hold on. How did this come up? Why are we talking about this all of a sudden? Eddie, sighing: Buck asked me to make a pact with you to make sure we wouldn't have a fight and ask him to take a side. Bobby: That's ridiculous. Eddie: That's what I told him - Bobby: Of course he's going to take my side. Eddie, eye twitching: ...Oh, so that's how we're going to do this.

#911 show #911 on abc #buddie #incorrect 911 quotes #incorrect quotes #eddie diaz #bobby nash #inspired by the brief period when eddie was mad at bobby #longer ones

[bnha-more-like-bnh-gay]

Shinsou: I hate all those things that were like, “they used to be so strong and funny…. ThEn [insert trauma here], now they are a shell of what they once were”

Shinsou: I can be traumatized and still be strong and funny. I’m the funniest fucker I know

Tsuyu: yesterday you said that you wanted to enter a coma so you didn’t have to deal with an authority figure being mad at you again

Shinsou: both can be true, am I not allowed to have duality, tsuyu??

#he’s fine he just has to be dramatic about it first #it’s so okay it not like I have a panic attack when an authority figure looks at me #that’s crazy I’d never nope not me #Aizawa is probably the current authority figure for shinsou #tsuyu is not afraid to check her on her friends mental health and we love to see that #what a lad #she’ll call bullshit without a second thought #anyway. I saw one too many things about Ellie being strong and funny until ‘David broke her’ and fuck that bullshit #as someone who has been abused their entire life that stuff makes me mad as hell #that being said. if that’s what someone needs to do to cope. I bid them the best of luck and all of my love and support #bnha #mha #incorrect mha quotes #incorrect my hero academia quotes #mha incorrect quotes #bnha incorrect quotes #incorrect bnha quotes #shinsou is in the izucrew #shinsou hitoshi #asai tsuyu #incorrect izucrew #izucrew #izucrew as family

[unlawfulchaos]

Mav, writing a letter to Santa: Dear Santa, I'm writing to let you know that I've been naughty.

Mav, still writing: and it was worth it, you judgemental bastard.

Mav: Cain deserved exactly what he got, and no matter how long Ice stays mad at me, I will not apologise.

Mav: Although my back is starting to hurt from sleeping on the couch.

#mav is definitely in trouble #mav is a petty bitch #ice is mad and staying that way #Mav's festive treat to himself is he gets to commit one vengeful act against cain #what did mav do #who knows #but you know it was something dramatic and excessive #and befitting of his hatred of cain #ice will stay mad until mav apologises #or until mav makes it up to him for the amount of paperwork ice had to do to smooth things over with cain #incorrect quotes #top gun #icemav #pete maverick mitchell #tom iceman kazansky #top gun maverick

[shit-people-probably-didnt-say]

Wylan: *At the garden centre holding a 4ft tree* Told my husband I wouldnt buy anymore plants… what should I do?

Put it back

Call him and negotiate

Buy it now, apologise later

Sneak it in and gaslight him into thinking we’ve always had it

#nina: D and then get mad that he doesnt pay attention to you when you talk #wylan: thats dastardly! its perfect #D? 4 #jesper doesnt want more plants because he is the one who ends up keeping them alive because wylan has the opposite of a green thumb #and wylan gets sad when they die #wylan van eck #wesper #soc incorrect quotes #soc #six of crows incorrect quotes #six of crows

[shsl-panic-at-the-everywhere]

this came to me at 2am one night

Sanji: do you even like women???

Zoro: uh- yes 

Usopp: press x to doubt

Nami: x

Zoro: fuck off witch

Meanwhile In Zoro’s head: why did I say yes? I don’t like women! I don’t even try to hide it… Was I caught off gaurd??? Why tf did I do that???

#one piece zoro #zosan #zoro #zoro x sanji #roronoa zoro #sanji x zoro #usopp #one piece #nami #incorrect quotes #sanji vinsmoke #black leg sanji #sanji #one piece sanji #vinsmoke sanji #op sanji #straw hat pirates #shit post #Zoro was mad for the principle of the matter #“it doesn’t matter that ur right #fuck you for not believing me”

[crybabycunt]

Yelena: Okay, Kate Bishop, are you ready to learn to drive?

Kate: Are you ready for me to drive?

Yelena: Sure, I've had a good life.

(later)

Yelena: Brake light. BRAKE LIGHT!

#bishova #bishlova #yelena belova #kate bishop #hawkeye #black widow #funny #crack #incorrect quotes #incorrect marvel quotes #marvel incorrect quotes #bishova incorrect quotes #bishlova incorrect quotes #yelena belova incorrect quotes #kate bishop incorrect quotes #inspo: the mad ones #.jpeg

[bbygirl-aemond]

alicent, trying to teach aemond about stranger danger: if a stranger came up to you and said, "i'm your mom's friend, she told me to pick you up," what would you say? aemond: oh! i know! "you're lying. my mom doesn't have any friends!" alicent: aemond, vibrating: was i right was i right was i right alicent, sighing: yeah okay

#i just love the idea of baby aemond trying to hard to be good but accidentally roasting his mama #who doesn't have the heart to get mad bc she knows he doesn't mean it #meanwhile aegon's in the corner like “you let him get away with this shit???” #bc if HE said it it would be wwiii #anyways #quotes #incorrect house of the dragon #incorrect hotd #hotd #house of the dragon #alicent hightower #aemond targaryen #alicent #aemond #aemond one eye

[fever-dreamer97]

Izuku: Do you wanna know a random fact?

Bakugo: Hah?

Izuku: Howl’s Moving Castle lost an Academy Award to Wallace and Gromit for best animated feature.

Bakugo:

Bakugo, looks up Wikipedia:…WHAT THE HELL?

#edit: I’m not mad at the fact that w and g won #the were rabbit was one of my favs as a kid #I just think it’s funny #look it up #anime #bnha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #mha #boku no academia #boku no hero #bnha manga #incorrect boku no hero academia quotes #incorrect bnha #incorrect mha quotes #incorrect bnha quotes #incorrect mha #incorrect my hero academia quotes #bnha movie #bnha anime #midoriya izuku #bkdk #bakudeku #bakusquad #bakugo katsuki

[behold-the-brave-battalion-17]

Sam: Being gay is a constant battle between "I wish to sit on a window bench with my lover, our legs tangling as we listen to the birds" and "Hey, let's go throw rocks at fascists" and I think that's very sexy of us. 

Kelly: If the window's open and you time it right, you can do both.

#samantha brown #sam the mad ones #kelly manning #kelly the mad ones #the mad ones #the mad ones musical #the mad ones incorrect quotes

[whatever-color-of-the-rainbow]

Kelly: You're going on a date with Adam?

Sam: He’s thoughtful, and attentive. Besides my total lack of attraction to him, he’s perfect in every way!

#kelly manning #kelly the mad ones #samantha brown #sam the mad ones #the mad ones #the mad ones musical #the mad ones incorrect quotes

[batfamhyperfixation]

Alfred: In honor of the six month anniversary of Duke coming to Wayne manor, everyone gets six eggs, six pancakes, six glasses of orange juice, and six cups of coffee (Tim in the background pumping his fist at the coffee)

Jason, acting as if he didn't get the same thing for his anniversaries growing up: Looks great Alfie, veeery normal

Dick: Since Duke coming to the manor was a dream come true, maybe we should all go around the table and share our dreams

Bruce: Well I'm living my dreams, my sleep is purely for recouperating

Steph: I had a dream I was Eleanor Roosevelt's personal assistant, and I just kept saying 'you go girl'

Damian: I dreamt I was being chased by a bear, but then I was the bear and the bear had to poop so I did and then I woke up and I had

Cass: I dreamt I was in a giant pool but instead of water, it was filled with guacamole and I was floating on a big chip

Steph: that's the third guacamole dream this week

Tim, writing into a notepad: this is great stuff, *muttering as he scribbles* reoccurring guacamole dreams

#tim sees the batfam as a prolonged naturalistic observation and himself as the tired scientist #little does he know he is also one of the subjects and is as insane as the rest of them. not in fact the under cover experimenter he thinks #thats just how he copes with the madness #batfam #batkids #bat family #incorrect batfamily quotes #bruce wayne #jason todd #tim drake #dick grayson #damian wayne #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #duke thomas #alfred pennyworth #source: the great north

[headfullof-ideas]

Ant and Maddie are absolute chaos gremlins when left alone in a room together, which means i love the idea of their friendship. Have some incorrect quotes about it

#I don’t know how to draw rebreather helmets #you think i would when one of my favorite fandoms takes place nearly entirely underwater #but I don’t #i love these two so much you dont even know #as soon as they start getting along everyone who knows them immediately wishes they still hated each other #neither of their families have known peace since these two became friends #the deep 2015 #ant nekton #antaeus nekton #mad madeline #incorrect quotes #the deep cartoon

[forthesapphicsonly]

Multiverse of madness

Peggy: *waking up* what?

You: oh, hey. Welcome back

Peggy: *looks around, sees the other members of the illuminati unconscious but intact. And alive. She puts her hands on her stomach, where she clearly felt the shield cutting her in half* How? who are you?

you: Wanda's girlfriend. Not that she knows yet *pouts*

Peggy just looks at you confused

you: I just go around undoing the things she does. She kills people, I bring people back. *you lean closer to her whispering in her ear* so she doesn't feel so guilty later. Not that she knows…yet.

Peggy: why not just stop her?

you: Stop? Wanda? Oh no, darling, it's impossible. Nobody stops Wanda, she needs to figure things out for herself. *you laugh* Stop her, funny. Anyway, nice to meet you. I really appreciate you more than Steve. I'm going now, they'll be fine *you wave to the other members as you leaves*

Carter just watches you walk away processing things. You understand. Coming back from the dead has this effect

#because I love peggy carter and i can't just let her die like that #i'm also supports wandas wrongs #you know #as a good girlfriend. #I would totally go after her cleaning up her mess while I wait for her to come to her senses #no one in the MCU is mentally stable and we know #dr strange multiverse of madness #wanda maximoff #peggy carter #marvel incorrect quotes #I'M BACK BITCHES #wanda maximoff x reader #reader insert #captain carter