#so trust me

[bpdohwhatajoy]

I really hate the way a lot of healing is presented. It’s not some “uwu flowers and sunshine everything is great!!!!” shit. That’s fake, disingenuous, and not realistic. If your recovery isn’t like that, don’t think you’re not making progress. That’s more toxic positivity than anything.

Recovery is gritty. It’s not never breaking down. It’s not never feeling bad. It’s not never feeling unhealthy urges. You’ll still break down (albeit less eventually but there will still be times of that). You’ll feel bad at times. It’s impossible to avoid negative emotions completely. They’re apart of life. It’s trying your best to resist urges and extending compassion to yourself when you do give in. You’ll still feel the urges. In fact I feel them quite often. It’s not never giving into them. It’s understanding that giving in is bad for you so you try your best to fight them off.

At first it might not even look like progress. You might think nothing is happening. You might feel hopeless. But progress with this stuff is slow. I mean think about it. You’ve been doing so badly for so long. You’re traumatized. Do you think you can undo that all overnight? It may take awhile to even see results. This is a gradual process. Don’t give up on it because it could take awhile.

Recovery is often confronting heavy things that have plagued you for years so actually a lot of negative feelings do come up. But the fact you’re confronting them and coping is proof that you’re healing and making progress.

Recovery involves finally standing up for yourself with people. It’s finally asserting your needs and stating how you feel rather than just sucking shit up and suppressing how you feel. It’s honoring your feelings rather than punishing yourself for feeling them or acting like feeling them is a wrong. It’s not tolerating mistreatment anymore. It’s saying ENOUGH. You can’t treat me like that. I value myself enough to not engage with that so I’m walking away and not letting them back no matter how they try to manipulate you.

Recovery is hard. It’s a lot of work. It’s getting kicked down and standing up with blood and bruises and taking care of the wounds. It’s not giving up even when you want to. It’s holding out hope for better days even if better days seem impossible. It’s also incredibly lonely which no one tells you. When you’re healing and putting up with shit less often, the same toxic people who banked on your tolerance won’t like how you are now so you will probably lose a lot of relationships either from you choosing to walk away or them not wanting wanting to stick around anymore since you’re finally not tolerating their shit. 2023 is the year of me losing the most relationships that I have over the course of a year I think but it’s also the best I’ve been doing mentally. Despite how lonely it gets, don’t give up on recovery and healing. Being alone is better than being drained by awful people.

Recovery is not putting up with mistreatment even when you think it’s what you deserve. Even though you feel worthless, you don’t let people treat you like that. You hopefully will get to a place where you feel good about yourself (I’m not there yet) but for the meantime it’s the action. Sure you feel bad about yourself but you stop letting people treat you like that.

You deserve to heal. You deserve to have your emotions honored. You deserve better from people. You deserve the hope that things can get better. Maybe you’re not at a point where this is possible. It wasn’t for me for many years. But when you start to undergo healing, revisit this post and you’ll see what I mean. I wish you all the best.

#ryan.txt #healing #recovery #healing journey #recovery series #so many emotions come up #you probably will feel a lot of sadness grief anger #basicslly anything you’ve suppressed #it’s normal to feel that stuff #recovery actually doesn’t necessarily feel happy #I mean yeah sometimes it does #but a lot of it is actually finally feeling stuff and not punishing and honoring whatever it is that you feel #I’m telling you it gets better and I’m not even close to fully healed #so trust me #it gets better #recovery journey

[cyniicism]

wyd when julia wins finals and becomes a hybrid angel devil (who can read minds) and destroys chris with the power of love alongside mk and they use the money to buy theodore land which consists of unicorns and cotton candy and unicorns and rainbows and unicorns and carnivals and unicorns and did i mention unicorns

#mkulia #riotical rambles #laugh emoji laugh emoji #sorry anyway #trust me this is the finale #trust me guys #fr trust me #like trust #im trustworthy #and you trust trustworthy people #so trust me

[cherry-pop-elf]

Hii!! I'm just wondering about requests as I see in your bio that those are open as well! I guess what I'm really curious about is what can be asked for requests? I don't want to assume or anything as I know that you have commissions open as well, and I don't want to be rude by sending a request, when really it's something that should be commissioned, and then not having the funds to be able to do so before the fic is even thought of (if that makes sense??? I apologise if it doesn't, I'm not always the best at verbalising my thoughts).

I hope this doesn't come off as rude at all TT I apologise if it does!

I hope that you're having a lovely day 💜

Don’t worry sug! I totally get what you mean! It can be a bit confusing, but I hope I can do my best in explaining! And my DM’s are always open if you wanna discuss more one on one!

Requests: What makes it one?

Requests are typically more open to interpretation to the writer. Like “hey can you do a chubby x reader where so and so-“ happens. Or “can you do some headcanons on-“ and more vagueness and left to more freedom. Course I’m more than open to more details. Another big difference is it’ll be public work to tumblr, so whatever you request will be seen by everyone.

Comissions: What makes it one?

Comission’s are, of course, paid for. There is also the fact you can get as detailed as your little heart wants, and have whatever you want happen to the finest details. You can have it be about anything and everything. You want some weird crack shop about like Severus Snape and Bill Weasley hooking up? I’ll give ya that! You want an extremely specific kink about your comfort character? There we go! Stuff like that also can be longer, and written in a more specific way. As you see with tumblr, it’s very much “as you go-“ writing style. While a comission will go through a lot of rough drafts, and be far longer and such

Finale take away

Requests are more so asking about “can you write a x reader/headcanons” while public on tumblr, while Coms are more so everything else, plus more and a private piece that you give consent on if can be shared on a media platform or not. As I’ve said before, I don’t mind extra details about stuff.

I understand that everyone is going through stuff. Trust me, I’ve been in and out of the ER constantly for health issues. Hence why I have art, and writing coms open. Money gets very tight when you have to keep being sent to the hospital. Not fun. I hope this helps! At least bring more clarity on the situation. If not, DM’s are open! Sending love!

#asks for belladonna #requests #commissions #writing community #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #writer stuff #writer things #anon ask #thanks anon! #anons welcome #hope this helps #coms open #coms #tumblr writing community #writing #ugh I still have more doctor appointments #come this may I’ll find out if I have the C word or not #so trust me #if anyone knows about being short on money #it’ll be me #judgment free zone #promise #hugs and kisses

[sayu-official]

BING BONG BING BONG (that’s the sound a mujina makes) (real) (not clickbat)

#i would know #so trust me #sayu sleeps on the job

[chilpilled]

his smile and optimism…….gone………

#halflings being treated so horribly and being used as bait and him making a union so others dont get treated as badly as he did. ourgh #no wonder hes defensive and doesnt trust people. it makes me tear my hair out #my silly little rabbit………… #chilchuck tims #dunmeshi

[portraitofadumbassonfire]

Me being happy that one of the firefighters on the firefighter show is finally canonically Bi despite never watching a single episode:

#911 abc #911 spoilers #evan buckley #y'all deserve it #i am a teen wolf veteran #so trust me i get it

[spyglassrealms]

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

#normally I don't chronicle my dreams here but fucking hell that one was funny #I think this would genuinely make tumblr better tbh #@ staff do this cowards #spy has thoughts #my life is a sitcom and i am my own laugh track #functional website #spy's smash hits #Glock function #edit for everyone in the notes saying 'everyone clapped' #I know I can't prove to you that it happened for real you're just gonna have to trust me on this #but I swear on my goddamn life I'm not making this up #I make so many conscious puns that sometimes my subconscious cooks up a real good one

[mountainshroom]

Felt like drawing some silly cats :)

#playing with/braiding someones hair is ultimate sign of trust for me #and i like the idea that katara likes doing peoples hair so 🥹 i dont knoww #bit of a modern au for them #and cats ofc #atla #avatar the last airbender #katara #toph #toph beifong #art #my art #fanart #digital art

[theshadowrealmitself]

I like to think that Vulcans who come to understand that Humans just can’t try to process emotions the same way as them, it’s just healthiest to let it out in harmless ways, decide that venting and stuff should be taken just as seriously as Vulcan’s meditation time, and will encourage the Humans around them to complain about what’s upsetting them

People who are used to aloof Vulcans who avoid Humans at all cost running into one comforting a Human

“-and then they said my cheesecake was subpar, and they didn’t even bring a dish!!!”

“The purpose of this event was that every participant brings a food item of sorts, correct?”

“Yeah!!”

“And they did not follow this rule while insulting dishes that were brought?”

“Mostly just my dish but yeah >:(“

“How illogical”

“That’s what I’m saying!!!”

#star trek #Vulcans #Humans #not based on a specific thing #but I used to know this annoying couple that were ‘family friends’ #who would show up to potluck dinners and the like and would either bring nothing or bring something really just. out of left field? #like a bag of frozen chicken to a bbq #and then proceed to make sure they are first even if it was stated to let kids go first #would take HUGE amounts before anyone else got a chance to get a plate #and then make off with the leftovers again even if they were already claimed for #and it wasn’t a food insecurity thing trust me I would never speak bad about a person getting food if that was even a remote chance #the adults who raised us knew them really well and we’d been to their house a ton of times #they were just dicks #and yeah. they’d occasionally insult the food. while eating the MAJORITY of it. #it was so weird at their home they would go out of their way to get the healthiest options possible #you know the really bland tasteless expensive stuff that apparently was healthier #but then if they were visiting our house they would. eat all our unhealthy snacks. #that always pissed me off so much as a kid because we actually had a food insecurity thing going on #and also a variety of other reasons that are a bit too depressing to bring up on this post #but anyways we’d hardly ever get to have nice snacks #and this couple would just take them all??? even after we’d tell them repeatedly that it was ours and those snacks weren’t gonna be #replaced #hated that couple #if you’re wondering why they were ‘family friends’ it’s because the couple who raised us #(it feels weird to type it out like that but apparently legal guardians doesn’t fit since they never finished petitioning 💀) #liked having them around because it made them look like ‘such great Christian’s’ being nice to the people #that no one else wanted to be friends with #I always thought that was a really weird and fucked up reason to be friends with someone #this got long sorry 😭

[hansoeii]

head empty, no thoughts. just turtleneck crowley

#that was his superior look no one can argue with me about this #literally THE crowley look my god #SHE LOOKED SO GOOD WITH IT #like my god #whoever decided to put david in that turtleneck deserves a raise #TURTLENECK CROWLEY!!!! #LOVE OF MY LIFE #kiss aziraphale again but with the turtleneck it'll work trust me #anyways #good omens 2 spoilers #i guess???? #good omens 2 #good omens #good omens fanart #good omens 2 fanart #crowley fanart #crowley #david tennant #neil gaiman #my art #digital art

[o0kawaii0o]

no mercy 😭

#one piece won the poll and I wanted to draw smth nice and wholesome #but I hated the perspective process and the multiple characters were a pain so where did that bring me? #that's right; perspective and multiple characters in shtpost format #don't you just love it when you put too much pressure on yourself and the way to fix that is to draw smth silly #vibrant colours go brrrr #pls trust me when I say I like sanji #I mean look at him #one piece #strawhat crew #sanji #luffy #zoro #chopper #usopp #nami #nico robin #cyborg franky #o0kawaii0o

[azfellschild]

day 4 of painting a random s2 scene until good omens gets renewed for s3

they wanna hold hands so bad u guys

#not rlly a scene but i love this pic so much #they did hold hands 5secs after this pic was taken btw #trust me i saw it i am God herself #good omens #good omens fanart #aziraphale and crowley #aziracrow #aziracrow fanart #gomens #go2 #go2 fanart #go fanart #ineffable husbands #my art #my gomens art #azfellschild

[egophiliac]

IT WAS ERIC AFTER ALL!!!! I'm so glad we got to meet him (before Vil snaps him away with those Infinity Gauntlets) (can't wait to see what happens when we get the matching Infinity Tiara to go with them, there will be no survivors)

(sorry to be so slow/rough lately, just got a lot of stuff on the ol' brain at the moment! alas, if only I could spend all my time drawing incredibly stupid characters I mean I do but)

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #tapis rouge #i know these are not my best but by god i needed to draw ~daddo venue~ #he is a treat! can't wait for him to yell at us for screwing up a shoot or whatever the last-minute disaster will be #i am SO HAPPY it turned out to be about movies after all! ...i mean sort of anyway #i'll take what i can get (and i do enjoy twst trying to be all cute about snow whAHEM i mean beautiful queen) (i see you there twst) #(also to be fair it actually wasn't poisoned in historial-revisionism-twstland so i think we can trust this apple. a+ acting eric) #anyway we are still. very solidly in the 'stand around and talk about the wallpaper for three hours' part of the event. #but HEY we got to meet eric! i was not really expecting it to be him so i am VERY pleased #also god help me i did think the shopping montage as portrayed by a rhythmic where they literally SKIP down the street was hilarious #there's a lot of Choices that were made in this event and that was a good one

[zariyen]

illust for Maid in Wonderland! It's a free digital fanzine so please check it out if you're interested 🥰🥰🥰

#thank you for trusting me with the cover auuguhgh i'm so honoured 😭😭💖💖 #thank you to Rui for lending me your beautiful lace designs 🥰🥰 #my art #za draws #twst #twisted wonderland #ツイステ #ツイステッドワンダーランド #riddle rosehearts #leona kingscholar #azul ashengrotto #kalim al asim #vil schoenheit #idia shroud #malleus draconia #リドル・ローズハート #レオナ・キングスカラー #アズール・アーシェングロット #カリム・アルアジーム #ヴィル・シェーンハイト #イデア・シュラウド #マレウス・ドラコニア #zine art #zine #maid in wonderland

[inkskinned]

hey btw if you're in the USA at  2:20 p.m. ET on Wednesday, Oct. 4, they're testing the emergency broadcast system. your phone is probably going to make a really loud noise, even if it's on silent. there's a backup date on the 11th if they need to postpone it.

if you're not in a safe situation and have an extra phone, you should turn that phone completely off beforehand.

additionally, if you're like me, and are easily startled; i recommend treating it like a party. have a countdown or something. be surrounded by your loved ones. take the actions you personally need to take to make yourself safe.

i have already seen mockery towards any person who feels nervous about this. for the record, it completely, completely valid to have "emergency broadcast sounds" be an anxiety trigger. do not let other people make fun of you for that. emergency sounds are legitimately engineered to make us take action; those of us with high levels of anxiety and/or neurodivergence are already pre-disposed to have a Bad Time. sometimes it is best to acknowledge that the situation will be triggering for some, and to prepare for that; rather than just saying "well that's stupid, it's just a test."

"loud scary sound time" isn't like, my favorite thing, but we can at least try to prevent some additional anxiety by preparing for it. maybe get yourself a cake? noise cancelling headphones? the new hozier album? whatever helps. love u, hope you're okay. we are gonna ride it out together.

#watching ppl go from being like ''support neurodivergent ppl~~!" #to being like ''if this is going to give u a panic attack ur fuckken stupid'' #like..... gets me #yeah man. i know im going to be triggered by it . in the old fashioned term. it is GOING to give me a panic attack. it's pretty much certai #and i shouldn't have to tell u about what i have survived for you to be okay with that. #you can just trust that i ALSO don't want me to react to it. i'm not gonna be having a FUN time. #dismissing that bc you think it's stupid.... like is the whole problem. #these sounds are workshopped by entire teams of people to get you to pay attention and move quickly. #they arent meant to be fun and exciting. #OBVIOUSLY it's gonna set ppl off. #but yeah there's something so fuckken demeaning about ppl being like. well that trigger isn't valid bc u haven't undergone X #dude i have ptsd bc i was abused as a child. like plain and simple. the fact im 30 and afraid of the dark tells you how bad it was. #i shouldn't have to ask u for permission to be mentally ill. #the reason it's a fucking disorder and not a fucking choice is that I DO NOT CONTROL IT. #like how is it any different from when ppl are like ''oh public speaking isn't that scary'' like FOR YOU #for YOU this isn't scary. now if i could fucking eat my own amygdala...

[frosted-co0kies]

I was rewatching But I’m a Cheerleader . Love the set design of that movie so much. Also rupaul in a straight is great t shirt

#deltarune #deltarune fanart #deltarune art #my art #kris dreemurr #kris deltarune #kris #noelle #noelle holiday #fanart #deltarune noelle #noelle deltarune #straight is great #repost if you stand with the straight flag 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ #asriel dreemurr #asriel #baby kris ily #Baby asriel ily too #Actually kris is still wearing a heart locket ingame it’s just under their sweatshirt #Trust me guys #That pic of 14 and 10 dreemurr kids was taken before dess’ disappearance #literally shitting myself why do the colours look so bad on my laptop