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suparhythm · 24 days

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Beyond Anxiey and Self-Isolation

The ceiling fan creaks a monotonous lullaby, a mocking counterpoint to the symphony of anxieties swirling inside my head.Sunlight bleeds weakly through the dusty blinds, illuminating the dust motes dancing a chaotic ballet in the air; each particle a tiny reflection of the disarray that is my life.My reflection in the mirror across the room mocks me,dark circles under bloodshot eyes, hair a…

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deez-are-the-memez-of-our-dreamz · 2 years

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¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#meme #memes #mental illness #mental illness meme #mental illness memes #self-isolation #eh #people #not a fan for the most part #depression #depression meme #depression memes #idk enjoy #<3

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wordsdarkerthantheirwiings · 2 years

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I read through my journal today and was struck by quite a few things, especially how insightful I’ve been for the last few years despite not always feeling that way - or rather, not realising at the time that I’m making genuine insights that have changed my perspective.

There were two particular insights that really struck me, the first being this:

[11/10/19] Growing up in an environment where doing things wrong scaled from actually misbehaving/being disrespectful to not doing the housework to a “standard” or being screamed at for judgments, perceptions and projections, coupled with constantly second-guessing somebody’s behaviour and the lashing out over small, irrational or genuinely insignificant things - as well as being embarrassed by somebody either infront of others or personally, about deeply personal things - was intensely traumatising and damaged me in ways I am still unable to fully comprehend. It is absolutely the reason I don’t want children of my own and holds me back from entering a relationship with anyone.

It is why I prefer solitude and isolate myself to cope. Such isolation quite probably also stems from the fact that I was completely isolated while dealing with it.

It is this latter part which really got me, because it relates to something I only realised quite recently:

which is that, as a child, adults in my life knew what I was going through but did not protect or stick up for me, and I really was on my own when dealing with what my parent put me through. The only exception is my paternal grandparents, who both knew exactly what my mum was like and tried on several occasions to step in and tell her to back off while she was berating me infront of them (embarrassing me infront of others, for anything from not finishing a book to the way I looked, my weight, etc, was one of her favourite pastimes), but it never got any further than the initial sticking up because she’d just yell at them to stop interfering. Then I’d inevitably get into more trouble because of how ~humiliated~ she was that other people tried to stop her.

But nobody else stuck up for or helped me. I know damn well that her family know what she’s like because her own mum has spoken to me about it, about knowing she has a massive drinking problem and an attitude and a temper. But they want nothing to do with it, even though they’re the ones who created her. Then on the few occasions as a teenager when I ended up snapping because she was aggressive and in my face, I was the one who had to quit shouting. I was the one who had to back down and leave it. Dad would come to see what in the absolute hell was going on and I was the one who had to stop. Any time I ever tried to defend myself against her always made it worse - and if she did back down, I always knew it would come out the next time, or the time after that. It was always me who had to stay quiet, leave it alone, don’t say anything god forbid she kicks off more.

And so, I had to deal with it myself. At the time that was by throwing myself into whatever fictional world I was into and pretending I was a powerful hero loved by everyone and in total control of my life, relationships and everything else. I listened to music as angry as I was, music that made me feel powerful, and didn’t reach out to anyone. Because I had been taught, for so long, that nobody could be trusted. Because I didn’t realise this parental experience wasn’t the norm. Because in the end, I knew they wouldn’t really stick up for me - it would somehow be my fault, something I had to apologise for even though I never started it. And I was that way for so, so long.

Now, things are different. I recognise when I need to talk about something with another person and am actually planning to ask for a therapist when I see the psych later this month, so they can help me work through a couple things. I do still step back to figure myself out sometimes and I think there’s merit in that - I don’t want nor expect other people to handle me when I can’t handle myself. I’m also pretty self-reflective now and if something makes me frustrated or angry or upset and I’m surprised that it elicited such a reaction, I’ll take it away to figure out why and then move forward the way I need to. A lot of the time it’s often saying “huh, makes sense I’d feel this way because it relates to [x], which I’ve worked out or am working on” and moving on.

But I definitely don’t self-isolate like I used to, especially since the psychosis has really backed off. I’m so much better at self-soothing and getting my feelings out when they need that space. And I’m grateful for the insight I’ve gained that’s helped me to grow in this way. It’s really nice to feel like you’ve overcome something written into the fabric of yourself, something you thought you’d never get over. And it’s nice to look back and see how far I’ve come.

#journal post #parental abuse #childhood abuse #self-isolation #recovery #healing #long post #this ends on a positive note despite how it might look(!)

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alphie-in-the-sky · 1 year

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#r/depressionmemes #r/depression_memes #stolen from reddit #hide and queue #self-isolation #thats me

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malakkc-poetry · 2 years

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Trapped Humanity

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#covid #depression #Malak Kalmoni Chehab #my poetry book #optimism #pandemic #perfectly flawed #reading by me #self-isolation #support #trapped humanity #trauma #understanding

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free-my-mindd · 5 months

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This is how you move on

#daily readings #time #distance yourself #prioritize yourself #self care #isolation #mental health

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interiorergonomics · 2 months

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Self-Isolation in Modern Workplaces

Self-isolation in a workplace is a proactive measure aimed at preventing the spread of contagious illnesses and safeguarding the health and well-being of individuals.

In response to public health concerns such as the COVID-19 pandemic, workplaces have implemented self-isolation protocols to address instances where individuals may have been exposed to infectious diseases or exhibit symptoms of illness. This practice involves isolating affected individuals in designated areas within the workplace, such as enclosed offices, meeting rooms, or designated self-isolation booths and pods, to minimize the risk of transmission to others.

In any way, isolating symptomatic or potentially contagious individuals, organizations effectively contain the spread of illness and protect the broader workforce from exposure.

However, self-isolation protocols actually involve measures such as remote work arrangements, increased sanitation procedures and clear communication for ensuring affected individuals receive necessary support while adhering to health guidelines.

Additionally, self-isolation in workplaces emphasizes the importance of prioritizing active occupants health and safety. in this case, fostering a culture of responsibility and resilience in challenging times.

Remember, before investing in either acoustic office booths or pods is better to take a feasibility study whether they're the best solution. Such feasibility analysis may cover their cost and ROI in order to benefit from them without negatively affecting the company's performance

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constantorbit · 11 months

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today i am made violently aware of how tiring self-isolation is. i wake up and i turn on the tv, throw the remote, and sob profusely into my bruised knees. i haven’t been around anyone in what feels like a bit longer than a lifetime and it is driving me no less than insane. i am tired. i am alone. i do not know how to ask for help.

#writing #i can feel it #self-isolation #sad thoughts #a little less than a poem

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met4lwhore · 2 months

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yall are pro mental illness until they hallucinate

yall are pro mental illness until they dissociate

yall are pro mental illness until they self-isolate

yall are pro mental illness until they're paranoid

yall are pro mental illness until they split

yall are pro mental illness until it's too Scary for your comparatively neurotypical brain to handle

#bpd safe #bpd favorite person #bpd #bpd splitting #dissociative identity disorder #dissociation #self isolation #borderline splitting #paranoia #neurodivergent #mental illness

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cinderellahoneymoon · 5 months

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im being so fucking for real and i need you guys to boost and reblog this you nonblack selfshippers have got to stop using "simp." you have to. its african american vernacular english (aave) which in colloquial terms means its not for you to use. in a space already hostile towards shippers of color, youre just making it more inhospitable to black selfshippers by appropriating our language. say youre crushing. say youre obsessed. say youre head over heels, say youre a sucker, say youre infatuated, just stop saying simp. for the love of god

{nonblack shippers [even other shippers of color] i do NOT want to hear your opinion on this post or hear about how you "didnt know" or are "changing it right now." just be an ally and LISTEN instead of needing to add your piece.}

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cloud9doll · 4 months

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louise glück, the white series // claude monet, houses in the snow // fyodor dostoyevsky, the gentle spirit // jane o. wayne, with solitude //reddit user artsykate, winter nocturne with lonely road // joseph brodsky, to m.b. // fyodor dostoevsky, poor folk // caspar david friedrich, winter landscape // audre lorde, the cancer journals // mahmoud darwish, memory for forgetfulness

#on isolation #on loneliness #on isolating #on self sabotage #web weaving #web weave #poetry #poetry collage #dark academia #winter #on depression #dark art #poetry collection #poetry compilation #avoidance #actually avoidant #avoidant attachment #fearful avoidant #mine

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yousaveeveryonebutwhosavesyou · 1 year

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I can relate to this

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floweringpoverello · 2 years

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At the Threshold of Darkness

In Times of Crisis #3 At the threshold Of darkness When there is little light To see It feels uncomfortable Painful, slightly But there change happens Gracefully. I wrote this sequence in the UK’s period of lockdown when the coronavirus pandemic was at its height. In September 2022, I found myself self-isolating with Covid, so I decided to revisit some of the poems, and after today’s…

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#Avila #contemplation #faith #God #love #patience #Poetry #prayer #self-isolation #spirituality

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hel7l7 · 6 months

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Leave me alone

#vent art #venting #mixed media #self isolating like a pro #i'm good #i'm fine

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free-my-mindd · 7 months

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Isolation is my favorite form of self care.

#text post #my thoughts #isolation #self care

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writingforatwistedworld · 1 month

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Hi! Can i ask for a self aware twst when the reader surprises adopted Silver as their son. Like just pointing at him and saying 'you are my child now' with Silver, Lilia and Sebek. Hope you have a good day!

Hehe. Anon, you know what you are doing. In fact, I would say you even want the chaos. And for that I love you come here so I can hug you.

Self-aware au

I do not take any responsibility for you reading this no matter which age group you are from!

WARNINGS: Yandere themes, Diasomnia chapter spoilers (Lilias part, maybe Sebek), religion, violence, isolation, kidnapping, obsessive behavior

Lilia Vanrouge/(Platonic) Silver/Sebek Zigvolt-Adopting Silver

Oh ok. Cool cool coolcoolcoolcoolcool

Well, at least that one room dedicated to you in the form of an altar can now be used for more practical uses (finally)

When Lilia heard you say those words and point at his son, he fell from the chandelier he was dangling from

Not only did he have to navigate through not accidentally telling his son that he was the blood related son of an enemy general and that exactly this general killed Malleus mom

But also that he had now a second parent that also happened to be god

Mhm totally normal

Conversations to strangers about his family were already playing out like this in his head:

Hi, I am Lilia Vanrouge, yes the one in your history book, this is my son Silver, yes he looks like a certain knight, and my lovely partner and also parent of this lovely human, yes, FU**ING GOD THEMSELVES

Ah yes, sitting in church will totally not be awkward after this

Bro legit sits you down with a pen and paper, asking you to sign the marriage certificate

Asks you what flowers you want to have on your wedding. Doesn't matter if you are a woman, man or identify as something else, he is planning that

Also has already planned out how to get you into the Valley of Thorns without anyone noticing

Because no matter how devoted he is to you, he will always be too greedy to share your attention with someone else

You could have said this as a joke or some other protective instinct towards the silver-haired male but all that man's father hears is a marriage proposal

Lilia is just happy that you feel some sort of positive way to his family member (makes things easier when you are stuck in that cabin)

I mean, he did see Silver as a present from you, a child meant to bring him back to the light after being so long in the shadow of war

And now the three of you were together! How lovely!

Which would mean that you planned this all along. Dear Overseer, if you liked the idea of you being a family you could have just told him so

He will be the best partner to raise a child together you could dream of

And should someone dare to interrupt the perfect, peaceful life you three (plus two more) had, he wouldn't mind swinging that sword again

Wait what?

What do you mean with that?

Are you sure you want him to be your son? Really?

Apparently he was not the only one surprised since he could hear the thud of his father falling to the ground behind him and Seek screaming somewhere behind him

Be prepared for a silver haired knight to look at you with the biggest puppy eyes and ask "Do you really want me as you son?"

Critical hit! Someone call a doctor. I think the Valley of Thorns god can be killed by cuteness

After that he is glued to your side (even though you have to part sooner or later since he is not living in Ramshackle)

One morning you woke up to the guy standing there with some food being like "I made some food."

Like where the Heck did he even get the keys for the dorm? (He broke in through a hole in the ceiling)

Silver always comes running to you whenever he does something and wants praises

Once he was best in one of his classes and he stood there with the report like he could turn into a dog and get headpats from you any second

But, as I am sure you are aware of, this is a blog with yandere themes and we have to say goodbye to the fluff at some point

That sword training comes in handy is all I'm saying

I mean, he has probably enough strength to break someone's leg with his bare hands by simply applying some pressure

And that one Diasomnia student that tried to take his son-status away from him was found again in a not-so-compatible-state-with-life kind of situation

I'm letting you imagine what happened

Like Lilia he is ready to burn everyone who dares to interfere with your little family

The forests of his homeland are pretty though so no need to worry about the appearance of your surroundings once they bring you to your new home (who needs social interaction anyways?)

A second of silence

And then the screaming started

“OH HOW KIND OF OUR OVERSEER! TO SHOW A MORTAL THEIR KINDNESS AND CARING SIDE!”

Seek would be lying if he said that he wasn't surprised

You, aka the Overseer, aka some higher being, AKA GOD, were known in the Valley of Thorns to be kind and caring, yet also distant and never approaching others directly

But then you literally adopt someone, making that person someone in your inner cycle?

Well, if Sebek knew one thing then that those Priests were going to have a crisis as soon as they learned about this

Totally not jealous

He would try to get closer to you since, apparently, you did allow others to get close to you

But he was happy as long as you were

After all, he was now the (not-so-official appointed) shield of the Valley of Thorns, something he got passed on by his grandfather

So of course he couldn't be family with you

That didn't mean he couldn't “help” you

Someone intruded on that dinner you had with Lilia and Silver?

Ouch… that punch must have hurt

Whenever Silver or his Father had to interfere because someone else came too close then they were some incredibly slick (looking at you Rook) or lucky person

Don't let his loud mouth fool you

This crocodile has done unmentionables in your name in order to make things easier for your new found family

For what? Oh you know, becoming his neighbor back home… forever

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