#no you know what. i want cheezits right now

[xzaddyzanakinx]

Not That Kind of Guy

Part Five: Stalker!Anakin Skywalker × femme reader series

Warnings: stalking, weirdo behavior, psychotic/delusional behavior, possessive/protective, sexism/misogyny, one-sided relationship, arm/hand kink, sexual content/fantasizing, pervy behavior, suicide/death metaphor[Be sure to pay attention to future warnings in the series]

Info: Anakin is and always will be the most romantic man to exist, that is all. Psycho!Stalker!Ani loves counting idk he just does & I know it.[diary entries from Ani] [texts from Luke] extremely not proofread. MDNI 18+

Diary Entry: July 8th

You’d better be glad I’m patient, or else you’d have another dead neighbor.

When I heard the *wwoop* of your phone sending out a text on my computer I didn’t check it immediately. Until I heard four *pings* in quick succession.

‘Lukey, call me.’

‘Why?’

‘I’m in class.’

‘10 mins’

‘Or emergency?’

Remember how I said I like Luke? I like him a little bit less. Who texts like that… just write a sentence like a normal person. One sentence.

‘emergency!!’

Emergency? The panic that flooded my veins was icy-hot as I frantically pulled up a the live feed of your home and blasted the volume.

Nothing.

You were just sitting on the couch snacking on those Extra Toasty Cheezits that you love so much. (Cheezits was a marketing genius for that though, profiting off burnt ones because little weirdos like you lived for that one random burnt piece at the bottom of the bag. Goofy girl.)

That doesn’t seem very ‘emergency!!’ to me. Unless you’ve run out of Cheezits, but you haven’t. I would know.

I chewed my nails, paced the floor, and wrung out my hands. I couldn’t just walk over there and say ‘Hey! Just wanted to make sure you’re okay cause I cloned your phone and saw a concerning text! How can I help?’.

You seemed fine, you weren’t crying, you didn’t look upset. You just started scrolling through Instagram reels and rapid-fire sending them to your sister as if she’d actually watch them all. We all know she won’t, but if you ask she’ll say she did.

‘step out. emergency!!’

‘no, give me 4. it can wait.’

Jesus Luke, are you trying to make me dislike you? I can’t believe you’d make her wait like that. The girl said it’s an emergency. That means pick up the fucking phone, dial her fucking number and say ‘I’m on my way, what’s going on?’

Drop everything and fucking run. I’d jump from a moving train if I got that text from you. Train station who? I have two legs and I can run pretty fast as long as I have the right motivation.

Pass a kid on a bike? ‘Scuse me I’m commandeering this vehicle.’ I’d be the fucking flash with pink tassels and purple glow wheels.

‘Now!!’

The suspense was literally killing me. I was withering away with worry.

‘if it’s the guy again I swear to god.’

Guy? What guy? What had I missed? There was a guy in your life that wasn’t me?

‘just fucking call me.’

Yeah, you heard the girl. Fucking call her already.

“No he did not.” Luke scoffed, as if what you’d told him was the most ridiculous thing he’d heard in ages.

“I swear. I swear he did!” You giggled folding over on the couch.

“There’s no way a straight man did that for you and didn’t try to fuck.” Luke laughed. “I don’t believe you. You’re delusional.”

“I am not!” You defended, not actually hurt by his comment but wanting to prove him wrong anyway.

“I literally don’t believe you.” He let out a snort and whispered something to Han on the other end of the line. “Han said he’s still set on Ben for you.”

“I told you I am not interested. There’s a reason I never texted him!” You retorted.

“Yeah because you lost his number you pea-brain.” He teased.

“No.” You said with a slightly haughty tone. “I happen to believe it was just the universe telling me it wasn’t meant to be.”

“That’s a really good justification for loosing his number.” Han’s voice came through the speaker slightly muffled from his distance.

“Shut up both of you. You’re horrible.” You laughed. “I’m sticking to it. The universe said no and I’m no match for the powers that be, m’kay?”

“Sure babes.” Luke said, you could almost hear his stupid little smirk.

“Anyway. Yes, look I’ll send you a picture of the book okay?” You hopped up quickly and snapped a picture to send to Luke’s phone. “Cause I can’t exactly send you a picture of him helping me with my groceries.”

“Mmhmm I know because it didn’t happen.” Luke said flatly. “Hard to get a picture of a hallucination.”

You rolled your eyes and huffed, Luke was just being protective. It’s not like he was wrong, most men wouldn’t do something like that out of the kindness of their heart.

“This would be so much easier if you had an iPhone. You might be hideous but I still miss your face.” You teased, hearing Han’s booming laugh in the background.

“Whatever.” Luke grumbled, “okay, so what am I looking at here?”

“See it’s this collection of paper that has typed out wo-“

“Smartass. I mean: what’s so… cool? about it?” He interrupted.

“It’s a special edition. $50. He just gave me a special edition book without a second thought.” You said excitedly. “Remember I lost my copy not too long ago?”

“Mmm yeah I think I remember.” He said noncommittally. “You should really keep up with your shit.”

“Hey I’m doing better!” You retorted. “My life is so put together right now. You’d be amazed.”

“Delusional Han I’m telling you.” He snickered quietly.

“Oh my god! Have you no faith in me at all?” You scoffed. “I haven’t forgotten to charge my phone or take my medicine. I’ve kept everything tidy. All my important stuff stays in my bag.”

“You’ve been possessed.” Luke gasped.

“Fuck. If I have then I’ve got the sweetest demon the 7th circle could provide.” You joked. “I’ve even been sleeping better, I think maybe even boogie is happier too. She’s started sitting at the living room window to watch the pigeons again.”

“Aw, my niece.” He crooned. “My *favorite* niece.”

“What about leia’s new-“

“I said what I said.” Luke interrupted.

Diary Entry: July 8th

The way you gushed about me on the phone was everything I could’ve asked for and more. I’ve never been so fucking proud of myself. I feel like I could… I don’t know lift a fucking car or something. I feel good. This is a good feeling, to be appreciated like this.

I want you to know how happy you’ve made me today.

To hear your voice, see your face, watch your body language as you spoke about how we met and our little chat today. I could live off purely that for days. Your giggle is nourishment for my soul, your voice is honey to drink with my tea, your beauty is the sugar in the much-to-big spoon I’d use to stir it with.

That’s what life with you would be like. Tea time. It’s soft, I always think of tea time as being soft; a big blanket of comfort and security. I just feel like it’s the perfect metaphor.

You are the ingredients. The tea leaves, honey, sugar, and water.

I am the the cup and life, fate, whatever it may be, is the spoon.

Can you use all of those things separately? Sure. But would it make much sense to pour hot water on a pile of dry leaves, drizzle some honey and sprinkle sugar into a goopy puddle right on the kitchen counter?

Would it be enjoyable to drink air from a small cup and leave the spoon lonely and unused?

No.

You need me to hold you; you are so many things. All of them are perfect and all of them are uniquely you. But when joined together in a secure little cup you’ll have the opportunity to mesh those things into something new.

A cup is just a cup if there’s nothing in it. Cold and empty ceramic. Sturdy and reliable although delicate when handled irresponsibly.

Fill me with you. All of you.

You’ve already started that you know? Each tea leaf is a tidbit of you.

Your likes and dislikes. Your happiest memories and even your sad ones, your angry moments, your bad days. I love and cherish even the deepest caverns and widest chasms in your beautiful mind. Without them, you wouldn’t be you.

Please believe me when I say that even if the leaves are crumpled or incomplete… it doesn’t mean that they won’t make tea.

Honey, my favorite. Your personality. God you’re so fucking sweet it hurts. Your voice, those lovely lips that speak such well written poetry.

My love, everything you say is a hymn.

I wasn’t a religious man before you. My Goddess, I fall to my knees at the altar for you. Speak to me and you’ll sing to my very soul. Tell me truth, tell me lies, tell me those things that float through the nether. I’ll take it all as gospel.

Ask of me anything and I will spill blood, even if it is my own, to provide you with whatever you wish.

I never understood why honey was akin to the nectar of the gods until I met you.

Now I understand. To taste you is to taste life. To smell you is to breathe freely. To feel you is to be soothed.

Sugar. Do you know how many grains of sugar are in the average tablespoon? Around 60,000. The human eye processes visuals at the average rate of 13 milliseconds per image. Even faster if presented with an image that invokes emotion. Though for the purposes of math, we will go with 13 milliseconds.

13 milliseconds is about 75 frames per second. 60 seconds in one minute. 4,500 frames.

If the average tablespoon holds 60,000 grains of sugar that’s 270,000,000 frames per second.

4,500,000 minutes. 75,000 hours. 3,125 days. About 102 months. Alittle over 8 years.

I use 3 tablespoons of sugar per cup of tea.

That means by our 25 anniversary I will have been graced with every grain of your beauty.

By then I’ll probably need a few more spoonfuls if I plan to survive raising children with you. If they’re as hyperactive as you get sometimes I’ll fucking need it.

Oh well. Just more time for me to bask in your beauty.

All these things have filled me, your cup. All that I need now is water. Your love.

The kind of love that burns so hot that it bubbles up beneath your skin and makes you itch if you’re apart for too long.

That’s what happens when water boils, the atoms separate and bounce around until they come back together as the water cools.

Just like us.

I’m the flame that’s heating your water, the closer I get the hotter it’ll grow until it’s rattling the kettle, screaming to be let out and bring all the pieces together.

Adding that boiling water, your love. It will bring life to me. You’ll warm the cold ceramic shell that I’ve been for so long. Fragile and lonely and horribly handled. I might have a few chips but the foundation is strong and worthy.

A cup is just a cup if there’s nothing in it.

You give me purpose. You make me useful.

I will let our love steep. Let it steep, because you can’t make tea without all the ingredients and a water-worthy cup.

We will stir it and stir it and stir it until the the hand of fate declares us ready, I will be there for you at the *clink* of the spoon against my rim.

I will be there after to hold you until the very last sip.

I will be there until I am broken beyond repair.

If the last sip happens before my ceramic cracks… I will be quick to join you after slipping through the hands of fate.

It’s a long winded way to say that I love you, but if you wanted, I would memorize it and recite it for you every night before drift to sleep.

Diary Entry: July 12th

You’re so cute.

I don’t know how you haven’t noticed that your laundry detergent should’ve run out ages ago. I giggle like a school girl everytime I see you at the laundromat holding it up to measure it out.

I’ve started washing my stuff in the same as you, I love the way your laundry smells.

But I love the way you smell even more.

You just bought some new sheets recently and I took the liberty of ordering the same ones. What luck that we both use a queen size bed huh? The cutesy little strawberry print isn’t exactly my style but I don’t give a shit. The giddy way you opened up your package was nothing short of adorable.

You know what else is super handy about using the same detergent?

You won’t notice when I switch them out.

You’re washing them for the first time today since you just received them in the mail yesterday. I know you’re so excited to put them on and make your pretty pink bed up, I’m amazed you had the patience to wait until today to go to the laundromat. It’s open 24/7, proud of you baby. Prioritizing that good deep sleep you’ve been getting.

You’re welcome, and thank you.

Watching you sleep from the end of the bed is one of my favorite things. It just… I don’t know it makes me feel comforted to be there. It’s the closest thing to sleeping next to you that I can get right now. Then I’ll be getting some good deep sleep.

It’s hard for me to rest if I can’t reach out and make sure you’re safe.

The audio from your room is wonderful ASMR though. Your snores and snuffles and the rustling of blankets while you sprawl out and occupy as much space as your body can manage; it’s soothing to me.

Partially because I know you’re okay, partially because I was able to give you that deep rest.

You wash your sheets once a week because you love the feeling of fresh warm linens. It’s the simple pleasures of life that bring you the most joy. That’s something I adore about you.

So here’s the plan. I’m a man of my word and I promised you a reward for all your hard work didn’t I? I’m also a man who enjoys the killing of two birds with one stone.

Life goes so much more smoothly if you take the time to line up the shot.

That’s why I immediately ordered my own set as soon as I checked your Amazon account. Mine arrived today too and I’ll be stopping by the laundromat just as you’re leaving. I’ve left them in the box and put it at the bottom of my basket though, I don’t want to ruin the surprise you know?

I’m so glad I was able to hear your little chat with your friends. Not only was it a wonderful reassurance, it also allowed me to plan our encounters more closely together. I’ve made myself known to you, I’ve spaced out our previous meetings well enough to leave you wishing you’d catch me out in the hallway even for a quick hello.

Trust me I have been dying to indulge you. But if this whole relationship has taught me anything it’s: trust the process.

See you soon princess, my timer just went off. I’ll be there just in time to watch you nuzzle your face into the last warm item of clothing from the dryer before tossing it in the basket.

Date:

July 12th

You were tossing the last of your clean laundry into the basket when the bell above the door jingled. Purely out of habit you glanced over, instead of the usual stranger or semi-familiar face, it was Anakin.

He seemed not to notice you straight away, keeping his head down and walking to the washer/dryer set closest to the front window.

It was shameful the way you took this opportunity to stare and soak him up. His whole physique just screamed at the primal parts of your brain. The parts that want you to sprint across the laundromat and l seduce him into ravaging you right up against the glass he stood near. Who cares who sees? You’d be beyond proud to be spotted in the throes of passion as long as it was him who was behind you.

The way his arms moved should be illegal. How is it possible for someone to be so… lean? The veins that and corded tendons that roll beneath his skin become even more visible as his wrist gives way to his hands.

Wide palms that would be perfect for grabbing a handful of your ass. Gripping your hips to guide you down onto what you can only assume is an equally impressive cock.

Long fingers as the most elegantly carved necklace. Fingertips that could trace swirling patterns across the vast expanse of your skin. Those same fingertips caressing the slick and swollen folds that just so happened to be in desperate need of his attention.

How could you not be a puddle of a person when he locks eyes with you like that? Like he’s reading the transcript of your soul, his eyes never stayed in one place too long. He needed to take in as much of you as possible each and everytime he was in your company.

How could you not forget how to speak when he walks over to you with such confidence? His towering frame would be intimidating if he didn’t radiate comfort. He seemed like he knew he had that affect on you, or maybe he was just one of those clueless types. That special kind of man who doesn’t realize what a catch they are.

“What’s up sweet girl?” He asked with that same gritty tone that had you feigning for him in ways he’d find unholy.

“Hey Anakin.” You managed to tone down the smile that instantly spread across your face. “I was just about to leave…”

“Well isn’t that a shame.” He chuckled, his eyes darting from your lips to your eyes and back again before he looked up and away. Stretching his arm up behind his head to rub his neck.

“Hmm yeah it is.” You murmured, too distracted by the tiny sliver of skin and dark hair the peaked out from beneath the hem of his shirt.

“Eyes up baby.” He teased, his finger tapping the underside of your chin before you could even register his hand was coming toward you.

‘Jesus Christ.’

If he can make your knees this weak from a few words… it’s almost concerning to think of the state you’d be in after he rearranges your guts.

The blush on your cheeks could’ve been mistaken for a sunburn, never had you felt so fucking embarrassed and flustered at the same time. You couldn’t even be mad.

“Let me help, yeah?” He said, choosing to glaze over your blatant staring and not push it farther with the teasing comments.

Truly a gentleman.

“Oh! Yeah, yeah.” You nodded. “Thanks.”

You managed a soft smile as your brain attempted to rewire itself into working condition again. He closed the dryer and placed your detergent and fabric softener beads into your basket and carried them over to his washer/dryer combo, expecting you to follow.

He sat it down near one of the many metal folding chairs lining the wall and turned to you again, his expression one of concern? Worry? Apprehension?

“You okay sweetheart?” He asked gently. “Did I make you uncomfortable?”

“What?” You asked, eyebrows furrowing. “Uncomfortable? No, no.” You shook your head in realization that he must’ve assumed he’d struck a nerve with his flirtatious comment.

“You sure?” He asked.

Somehow his hands, those strong hands that you just knew would feel like heaven on your skin, had made their way to your biceps. Slowly traveling the length of your forearm to hold both of your hands in his, your fingers curved over his while his thumb rubbed your knuckles.

“Yeah, I’m sure.” You nodded, shooting him a bashful smile.

His eyes searched your face like he was scanning for even the most minuscule change in expression, any twitch of your lip or shift in your line of sight that might say otherwise. When he was sure you were being truthful he spoke again.

“Alright princess,” he conceded with a warm tone. “you sticking around or headed out?”

“I’d stay to chat for a bit if I could, but I’ve gotta clock-in, in about… 45mins.” You said, thankful for the change in subject.

Anakin never failed to both confuse and amaze you. Every fucking time you spoke to him. You were tired of telling yourself he was just too damn good to be true, fuck it, he is that good.

In all your years, you’d never had a man check-in with you like that and in such a caring and considerate way… you couldn’t have dreamed up a man like this. It was a small detail of his character, but it made a world of a difference.

If you would’ve said ‘yes, that made me uncomfortable.’ you had no doubt in your mind that he would apologize and mean it. He’d mean it, apologize with his whole chest and make sure that it never ever happened again.

That was the kind of comfort and security that only a fictional love could provide.

But here he is.

In the flesh.

Maybe hearing about this, Luke might change his mind. Luke was only doing his job as your best friend and protector, shielding you from the dangers of the average Brad that you’d dated in the past. But…

Anakin’s not that kinda guy.

“You know, I don’t think you’ve ever told me where you work.” Anakin pointed out.

“Huh, I guess I haven’t.” You realized. “Bluebird Diner. It’s a good place to eat, yummy pie.”

“Oh yeah I’ve been there before!” Anakin said happily, “that butterscotch pie is so good, oh my god.”

“Right?” You agreed excitedly. “That’s my favorite. I’ll have to tell Rosa that she’s getting compliments on it. She’ll be thrilled.”

“Maybe I’ll grab a slice later.” Anakin suggested. “Before I have to go clock-in.”

“Where do you work?” You asked, finding it a bit comical that you were drooling over him but didn’t even know this basic detail of his life.

“The Cerulean.” Anakin nodded toward the window. “Just a couple blocks from here.”

“The Cerulean? What do you do, bartend?” You asked, curious as alittle itch in the back of your mind needed to be scratched.

“Mhm, I do.” He smiled.

“I think… oh my god. I think I’ve seen you there before!” You laughed. “It was a while back but I was there with some friends… you made my drink!”

“Really?” Anakin laughed. “Shit don’t make me feel bad baby, I don’t remember that.”

“I didn’t expect you too.” You giggled. “The place was packed. I can’t imagine how many people you serve a night.”

“You’ve got no idea.” He blew out a puff of air, with a chuckle.

“Well I’m due for a night out soon,” you said with a grin. “You come grab some pie later and I’ll come get a drink from you tomorrow night.”

“Sounds like a deal princess.” He beamed.

Part Six

Tag-List:

@wickedtactics @tsugumiholic @kingdomhate @burnthecheshirewitch @exquisitcorpse @arzua10 @bby-imasociopath @depressed-kay @aliciaasky @naty-1001 @mrsmikaelsxn @bunnylovesani @ausskywalker @angelsadmired @slut4starwarssmut @chocolatepalacecloudhoagie @starkiller419 @hearts4mitski4 @lethargic @allhailbuckybarnes-blog @shadowhuntyi @mortalheartache @fallinlovewithevil @sythethecarrot @chaoticantihero @vadersslut @luvvfromme @anakinsbaee @doblasftcisco @sweetcheesecakesblog @luvskywxlker @angelsadmired @kaminokatie @anakin-pilled @graveyard-stray @chiaraanatra @jediavengers @zapernz @lunalitva @salted-snailz @queenofchaos99 @ellie-luvsfics @dazednstars141 @rorysbrainrot @hopesworlld @lonaah @t8lzw @guiltycherries @syralix @doblasftcisco

THE TAGS LIST IS FULL! But if you want to be tagged I will comment ur username for you. Love you all so many.

#star wars anakin #anakin skywalker #anakin smut #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin x reader #star wars #anakin x you #sw anakin #darth vader #darth vader smut #darth vader x you #darth vader x reader #hayden christensen x reader #hayden christensen #anakin imagine #anakin skywalker x reader smut #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin fanfiction #anakin #anakin skywalker x you #stalker!anakin #star wars x reader #starwars fandom #star wars fanfiction #james kelly

[dinasfavslut]

LoserEllie x Fem!reader

a/n: This fic was supposed to come out in late August or early September, so I am a month late, and I'm sorry. I hope you enjoy it since I've spent a while on this (I started writing and never finished).

Warnings:smut 18+ Minors just dont interact, Smoking, Sexual thoughts, Cussing, Pet names, Teasing, Oral, Fingering, Slight mention of strap, Squirting

Everyone is aware that Ellie smokes; we have all seen it. Of course, there are also the dealer Ellie fics, which I absolutely love, but just picture Ellie making reader squirt for the first time while high!

Ellie calls you over for the "usual" hangout of smoking, fighting while playing the latest video game she purchased, exchanging lust-filled glances at each other, and taking turns going to the restroom to deal with your neediness so you don't pounce on one another. The typical predicament continues.

"Okay, how about a crash bandicoot?”

She places the joint between her soft pink lips and says, "I mean, it's whatever." Her fingers, god, her fingers, her hands, and how she flexes them after spending long hours writing or drawing, playing the guitar, rolling blunts and joints—you could go on and on...and on—is almost down to her fingers when she takes another drag.

You two have long been "friends." Everyone in town knows that you and Ellie are more than "just friends", but as far as the relationship goes, it isn't dating or just a friendship, and that kills you. You like Ellie; you really like her, and smoking enhances that feeling toward her. Additionally, it also helps to want to get pounded by her right on the couch.

She had already loaded the game and begun playing while you were still deep in thought. She was so engrossed in her game that you could see her thumbs and fingers pressing and moving the various buttons. "I'm going to get a snack, Els. You want something." She gave a brief glance over, not straining her head from facing the TV. Her gaze seemed to remain fixed on your body as you stood up, pressing your thighs together as you did so.

"Yeah..." You entered the kitchen in search of a bite to quell your hunger. You discovered cookies, popcorn, Cheezits, and wet wipes after searching the cabinets. Why were wet wipes kept in the snack cabinet?

“Ellie?” You gave her a concerned-confused look as she held up the wipes.

“What?” She looked at you, and you just waved around the wipes.

"Uh, well, keep the ants away.”

“Where the fuck did you hear that?”

“I read it or something somewhere... But that isn't a snack, bubs.” Obviously, the wet wipes weren't a snack. You walk over to her and straddle her lap.

"I'm not going to make you eat the wet wipes." Your thoughts had returned to what had just been said a few moments prior: "Wait, Ellie Williams, do you have ants!?" She gave you a dumbfounded look like a middle school boy who had just been scolded. "You have ants when you were about to let us eat food from your cupboard?"

"Calm down, baby. The wet wipes carried out their duties."

"And how do you know that?"

"I didnt hear any screaming that you saw an ant," she said. She shifted into a new position, pushing her hips a up little higher. You noticed this bump or something rigid. None of those properly expresses what you felt. The bulge in her pants was pressing directly on your clit while you were seated on Ellie's lap. You were soaked through, which was unfortunate for you. You were wet before, of course, but now it was leaking through.

Ellie picked you up and set you down next to her, but she quickly noticed the mess you had made beneath yourself. "You, um, do you need any help with..." you nodded quickly in order to get to you something you have been waiting ages for while also stopping her from finishing her sentence she laid you down in front of her, lifted up your skirt to let it rest on your torso, and pulled off the green underwear you had chosen to wear that day, which of course would need to be washed. "Just relax for me; it is okay, I’l make it feel good, promise". You trusted her i mean why wouldnt you- your trusted ellie with yourself at least, so when she kept kissing the inside of your thighs, you didn't question, but you did whine.

“Els please” 

"Right, I'm sorry." She gave you her silly little smile before returning to her task at hand. Her lips were almost immediately attached to your clit. You whimpered and gasped loudly from her movements. The effects of the weed haven't faded quite yet, making all of Ellie's movements feel 10 times better, but let's be real, it's Ellie fucking Williams, and you've been wainting for this forever.

“E-el-” She slid her agile, calloused fingers into your cunt, causing you to let out an exasperated gasp, followed by a loud moan. You tilted your head forward to see her face. Her eyes were stuck to the way you just kept dripping and how her fingers were being swallowed up so easily.

“Ive got you, babe. Lay back for me. Can you do that for me, pretty girl?" Responding to her request, you nod and lay down. The pace of her fingers quickens, and she hits a spot that makes your head feel light and your tummy coil.

 "Els, please." Ellies, ignoring your pleads, having lust take over. Completely, you feel yourself about to let go at any minute, any second, but it's not like all the times you've fingered yourself to the thought of her before. Ellie's mouth on your clit,  her fingers thrusting out of you, you moan louder than you even knew your voice could handle. She continued quickening her pace until she drained everything out of you. You “came” all over her hands, face, and couch. She pulled her head back and paused for a moment. “I-I am so sorry, I didn't mean.”

She places her finger over your mouth to hush your apologies. "It's alright, angel; I know you couldn't help it.” You were embarrassed by your actions, but somehow, even though she had a big mess that she had to clean up, her reassuring words made everything fine. She leans right over you and places a kiss on your lips. “I think I'm in love with you. Actually, I know that I'm in love with you. I love you, bubs.”

"I love you too Els."

#the last of us 2 #ellie williams #ellie williams fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams tlou #ellie williams smut #ellie tlou #the last of us ellie #the last of us smut #tlou part 2

[certified-anakinfucker]

Get to know me <3

tagged by @ermakeys

Rules:  Tag (10) people who you want to get to know better.

Relationship Status: polyamorous qpr collect em like infinity stones and pokemon superiority /lh

Favorite Color: pastel pink tbh

Three Favorite Foods: pizza hut pepperoni pizza.. uhhh cheezits.. nutella

Song Stuck in my Head: it changes by the second like a badly tuned radio but. the song i listed below this bc its what i woke up to

Last Song I Listened To: “Midnight Breaks” (Amber Spill)

Last Thing I Googled: “midnight breaks amber spill”

Time: about 11:27am as of posting

Dream trip: back to go see my partner rn :(

Anything I Really Want Right Now: my partner, but also mmmmmmmm my paycheck

No pressure tags! uhhhh @perasperaadastrawriting @friedennic @beroyas @baba-fett @bitesized-dogma @calamity-aims @chiafett @canichangemyblogname uhhhhhhh @crowbafett and anyone else that wants! ♥️

#cheeri tag game #forgot to even make that tag #oopsies. anyway

[magicaltriofromthedreamworld]

heres my first fanfiction!(gosh this is embarrassing)

Translation brought to you by the cats droid

▪• ●Pen Pals●•▪

Seamus x momo

Momo has been working up the courage to ask seamus on a date but little do they know that seamus has been writing a letter with blush (programmed*i dont know but it shows*) on his screen

Words:i dont know

Momo's POV:

(we are just going to call the cat cheez it ok?*you can also tell me what you want to call the cat when doing requests for stray*)

As I paced around the room thinking of how I can tell him, cheez it meowed at me "oh, right sorry" I said as i got the cute creature some food

But then it hit me

"I'VE GOT IT!" I yelled excitedly

Cheez it jumped suprised by my yelling

"Sorry..you ok?"

Cheez it nodded happily

Momo got up and got a paper and pen from their desk

15 minutes later

As momo tied the basket around cheez it and placed the letter carefully in the basket

Cheez it meowed happily clearly liking the look

"Now..i need you to deliver that letter to seamus please" I said

Cheez it nodded and went off to go deliver mail

Seamus POV:

As was working on a letter for Momo I didnt notice the orange colorful creature coming towards me

"Sincerely Seamus" I said finishing the letter

*Meow*

"AH!" I yelled

"Cheez it you scared me"

*meow*

I notice a basket as i was giving head scratches to cheez it

"Huh? Whats this"

Cheez it meowed excitedly

I take the letter out examining it carefully

As i read the letter my screen started to overheat

Everything was perfect about it

The handwriting

The neatness

The way that the words are phrased perfectly

It was......

the perfect letter

A heart was displayed on my screen

Cheez it snapped me out of my thoughts

"Can you deliver this to momo please?"

Cheez it nodded

I placed my letter into it carefully like it would fall apart like a glass doll

as the cat ran off i started to think about them

"They.....really do like me?"

Momo's POV:

As i hear a meow i get worried

What if they dont like me?

What if they already have a partner?

What if they say yes?

As cheez it walked up to me i saw a letter

As i took the letter Cheez-it was trying to imitate a drum roll and then got tired and decided to scratch the carpet instead

I opened the letter

Each word made my screen heat up more and more as i read the letter (heart screen heart screen) they...liked me back? I did a little victory dance and then decided to meet up with seamus

"SEAMUS OVER HERE" i waved getting his attention

(Cheez it is following them*cheez it the matchmaker*)

Seamus ran up to me

"Hi..."

"Hey..."

It was dead silent, so silent that you can hear a pin drop

"So..do you want to go stargazing?" I asked

"Sure!" They said excitedly

As we walked a cute cuddly creature was following us behind

"This is nice" seamus said

"Yeah, it truely is.."

We looked at eachother for a moment our screens heating up

As our screens grow closer we feel a sensation

A sensation that bound our hearts together

A feeling that this was right

Then

Our screens bonked together

It was nice, a great feeling as we pulled away hearts were on our screens

"Wow." Seamus said

I was speechless ("i can believe we just did that") i thought to myself

We sat in silence for a moment trying to recall what happend

"I better get home, Cheez It is probably scared"

"Would you like me to walk you home?"

he grabbed my hand

"Sure."

(Cheezit was doing a victory dance before they went to momo's house)

Hope you liked this again this was my first fanfic to write

#seamus #momo #stray game #fanfic #gay robots #little message #pen pals #first time writing #Punctuation sucks #Heart screen #Fluff

[biohazard-inevitable]

8, 13, 24, and 46

HELL YEAH!!!

8. How many water bottles are in your room right now?

Damn okay, exposing my ass…. Its 5.

13. When was the last time you ate?

A few cheezits literally 5 minutes ago when we were ON CALL BESTIE! I was munchin the whole time

24. If we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

Easy bud, gazing at the stars discussing our deepest desires while i maybe occasionally infodump star facts I remember as we gaze into the cosmos, maybe we steal a glance at each other and shespishly chuckle, intertwining our fingers to look into each other’s eyes before a metor storm breaks out, lighting up the sky like fireworks as we tell each other “i love you”, a secret kept only between us and the cosmos

46. Favorite holiday film?

I absolutely am a sucker for the classic 1964 stop motion masterpeice that is rudolph the red nose reindeer. I still have an old old build a bear rudolph that says quotes from the movie with a light up nose that did a run in the 2000s at one point. Rudolph was the ideal first gender that i knew i wanted, the first if many deers that would encapsulate my brain into knowing i was a boy. Rudolph dearest trans icon

#ask game answers #thank you for the ask!!!!! #absolutely adoring these questions!!!! #if anyone else is reading these tags DO send me more i am LOVING ITTT

[proserpina-magnus]

how about reggie with a s/o who has an oral fixation? <33

Absolutely! I literally love this prompt. Mwah. (Also, this is a bit short, sorry!!).

S/O With a Oral Fixation (Regulus Black)

Prompt: Reader sucks off Regulus in the library.

Reader: n/b

Word count: 1.5k

Warning: smut (oral, male receiving), finger sucking, risky sex (in public), “lovely, love, baby”, soft dom Regulus, oral fixation, and spelling mistakes.

Regulus didn’t know why, but it became pretty clear in the first few weeks of dating that you had an oral fixation. He wasn’t sure how this occurred and he wasn’t going to ask in case it was personal, but he always became weirdly worried whenever you always began to chew on your hoodie strings or fingernails.

He found it gross at first, he won’t lie. He always mumbled something like a “don’t do that,” or “take that out of your mouth,” he felt like he was watching over a little kid.

He didn’t want to indulge himself into letting you keep this bad habit, but before he realized it he was replacing your chewed up hoodie strings with his fingers. At first it wasn’t sexual, a simple replacement for the already abused strings and ridged fingernails.

Soon you had become reliant on his fingers, instead of reaching for your hoodie strings you would suck on his fingers. He noticed that half the time you didn’t even realize what you were doing or the way it was having an effect on him. And when his friends began to tease you about it, he snapped at them. Without realizing it, Regulus began to like whenever you seeked him out just to suck on his fingers.

“Baby don’t do that,” he scolded you quietly in the library, you looking up from your book pages not understanding what he meant. He gently took his fingers from your mouth and you puttered at the loss. “M’sorry,” you mumbled embarrassed, wiping your wet lips on your jumper sleeve.

Regulus sighed, rubbing your head gently as he cupped your face in his rough hand. “You can do that later, not right now. We’re in public love,” Regulus promised and you nodded. Your heart felt heavy and with the scolding he gave, you felt a need to suck on something. You ran your tongue across your teeth, sucking on them to try and soothe the urge but it wasn’t enough compared to his fingers.

You lost interest in your book, sighing while laying back in your chair as your eyes fixated on his fingers. You watched him turn the page of his potions book, your eyes following everytime they moved.

You had waited a good few minutes, making sure Regulus was deep in thought before you took his hand and slipped his fingers into your mouth again. Your eyes closed in relief, sighing out deeply as you were finally given something you wanted.

Regulus had snapped out of his daze once he felt his fingers in your mouth, his chin in his hand as he watched you suck on his fingers. You were really such a simple thing.

“I’ll tell you what,” he caught your attention, your eyes snapped open as you pulled his fingers from your mouth, rushing out an apology that he dismissed.

“I still have some work left to do, but if you really need to suck on something you can get on your knees and use my cock,” he offered plainly, and your heart thudded at his word. Your cheeks grew hot, mouth slightly opened as you tried to find an answer for his appeal.

“But- but we’re in public,” you whispered, he always scolded you for sucking on things in public, was this a test?

“I know, but my baby’s needs are a bit more important than mine,” he soothed, he took your elbow, directing you to the edge of your seat. He planted a long kiss against your lips, before pulling away. “Come on,” he whispered. You where completely loss for words or movement and Regulus laughed at your dumb state. He helped you to your knees, placing your hands on his belt.

“Lovely,” he caught your attention and you looked up, he smiled down at you and rubbed a hand through your hair. “Take off my belt,” he told you and you fumbled with the lock. He watched your shaky hands try to push the steel away from the hole, and he caught notice of your frustrated expression.

“Shh, it’s okay,” he comforted after he saw the tears well up. “I’ll help,” he clarified as you set your hands on his knees and waited eagerly. With ease he pulled the steel from the hole and unhooked his belt, he pulled the button from its hole and then zipped his trouser down. Your breath caught in your throat as you watched him pull out his cock, lousily stroking the base. Your hands slapped his away, taking it in yours as you squeezed the flesh against your palm.

Regulus gave a look that you didn’t catch, he was about to pull you away for a punishment but he caught the sensitive look in your eyes and the way you whined like a dog, he decided you needed this a lot more than he thought. He was fascinated with the way your shaky bodied stilled as you took his cock in your mouth, your sigh making him flinch.

This was immediately better than his fingers, your mouth sucking hungrily for more of his length. Your tongue felt at home as you slid it around the underside, you could even pinpoint the thick veins. You paid no mind to the way your knees ached, your cheek resting on his thigh as your eyes slipped closed. This was exactly where you needed to be.

Regulus had to pull himself away from looking down at you, focusing on his book. You became deaf to any noise, not hearing the footsteps that passed by or the scratching off quills. Even with this risky task, you felt safe. You could almost fall asleep, mouth sucking against his hard skin. You didn’t even realize he was close to climax, completely numb to the idea that this also felt good for Regulus too.

You felt a hand through your hair start to gently rub against your scalp, Regulus whispering a gentle encouragement for you to open your eyes. You blinked, looking up with a mouth full of cock. “Hmm mmh,” you gurgled and Regulus nodded like he understood.

“I'm done baby, let’s go to my dorm,” he gently spoke and you squint your eyes confused, how long had it been? You felt his cock slip from your mouth and you grabbed it from his grasp, slipping it back in. Regulus gave a small chuckle and pulled you away while you gurgled and whined for it back.

“Reg I’m not done-“ you told him, drool slipping down your chin as you looked up at him with wide eyes. “Reg I’m not done,” you repeated.

“Shh I know I know,” he shushed gently, rubbing your cheek to calm you down. He slipped his cock back into his trousers and you felt the urge to cry. “I’m telling you we’re going to my dorm,” he finalized once again, your hands going to pull his trouser back down to get his cock.

“No baby, that’s enough,” he whispered, taking your hands and pulling them away. He buckled his belt and you became frustrated. At this point you had begun to cry, tears slipping down your cheeks as you rubbed his thigh. “Please Reggie, I’ll be good, I’ll be really good, can I have your cock now?”

Regulus softened at your words, bringing you up as he sat you in your chair. He leaned close, rubbing your cheeks to wipe away the tears. “I know you’re being good, I just want to take this to my dorm-“ “can I have your cock then?” You cut him off, desperation leaking in your words.

Regulus kissed your forehead and rubbed the low of your back, “I’m not taking my cock away, okay? Please stop the waterworks and listen to what I’m going to say,” he whispered in your ear. You faltered, nodding as he pulled away. Even though you nodded, you began to talk over him once again. Regulus sighed as he grew angry, his thumb slipping into your mouth. You sucked on it without being told, nerves settling as you calmed down.

Once Regulus knew you were going to listen, he began to explain to you again. “You can't have my cock right now,” he started and he saw the flash of anxiety in your eyes and quickly explained himself.

“But, once we get to my dorm I’ll take out my cock and you can suck on it until dinner, you understand?” You nodded, taking his thumb out of your mouth.

You got up quickly, ready to sprint to his dorm but Regulus tugged you back and onto his lap. He firmly placed a hand on your stomach, keeping you from running.

“Lovely, what do you say when I give you something you want?” He whispered and you shuddered, you turned around kissing him quickly. “M’sorry, thank you for the opportunity sir,” you correct yourself.

Regulus let you get up, standing up behind you as he purposely pushed his hard cock against your thigh. You breathed in deeply, stomach whirling.

“Don’t forget your manners again, last time I let it slide today,” he warned, you nodded and Regulus placed a hand on your waist for a warning. “I understand sir,” you corrected yourself again.

“Go on, I’ll see you in my dorm,” he patted your ass and pushed you towards the library exit. Regulus chuckled as he heard you run down the hallway.

--

Link to my MasterList and Taglist form.

Taglist:

if you don’t get tagged, check piracy settings or username.

@lissa-duh

@cheezit-chystler

@lillsthoughts

@aesthetxcimagines

@kaqua

@remuslupinswhore

@zzzfour

@Lunawifey

@Frantic-realm

@Margaretpotter

@rebecca-johnson-28

@pottahishotasf

@haroldpotterson

@WENDY

@kermit-14

@chanellewts

@bee-m02

@siriusstwelveyears

@indigoh4ze

@blue-4-55-readinglist

@myalupinblack

@i-am-bi123

@ildm4ev

@lvrjoy

@jamesandregulueb1ch3

#marauders #marauders smut #regulus black #regulus black smut #regulus black x reader oneshot #regulus black x reader headcanons #regulus black x you #regulus black x reader smut #regulus black x nb reader

[mcugiggles]

Shame

I never see fics that are just a conversation about tickling, so I thought I’d make this!

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Loki has a conversation with the youngest resident of the avengers tower.

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Loki’s temporary stay in the avengers tower was unexpected to say the least. Thor’s decision was barely mutually agreed upon, but Loki needed a place to stay, and Stark’s tower had plenty of extra space.

You had avoided running into the prince for as long as possible in fear of perhaps angering him, or getting into trouble, but something was bound to happen sometime.

Stumbling into the kitchen, rubbing your eyes, and keeping the light off for comfort of your tired body, you went in search of a snack. Opening cabinets and the fridge, you found yourself staring at a box of cheezits on the top shelf of the cupboards. You were in truth not too short, but living in a billionaires house meant big rooms and tall cabinets.

Huffing, you reached up as high as you could, but couldn’t possibly reach the box. Now that you were awake, you refused to settle for anything but cheezits. It was the middle of the night, so no one was up to your knowledge, meaning no one could come help you.

Maybe Stark has a ladder. The thought was held in your head for a moment before you turned around, breath hitching at the site in front of you.

Long dark hair, green eyes, and a smirk, all belonging to the handsome prince of Asguard.

“Hello, young one. Do you need help?”

Immediately realizing how underdressed you were compared to him, your face turned red, standing there in your big bird pajamas.

“I- I was just gonna get the cheezits.”

“Allow me to help” Loki said with a smile, walking forward.

“No no, you don’t have to.” Despite your protests, you moved to make space for him, and he easily fetched the box for you.

“Thank you.” You mumbled as you grabbed them from his hands.

“You’re very welcome, darling.” He said with another quick smile, walking back where he was standing before.

“So… why are you up so late?” You asked after only a moment of quiet.

“No one is up, or so I thought.”

Not knowing how to respond, you nodded your head a little and looked down at the cheezits. You weren’t very hungry anymore.

“And why are you up?” He asked you. He spoke to you with a layer of what sounded like sarcasm, as if he didn’t actually care to hear your response.

“Umm, I got hungry.” You replied, not looking him in the eyes, which you realized were a nice shade of green.

“Well, you don’t seem to be hungry now.” He was right. You lost your appetite among the awkwardness of the situation. Possibly you were making a bigger deal out of this than you needed to, but it was hard not to be embarrassed in what looked like children’s pajamas, despite the fact that you are a child, in front of a very handsome prince.

“I- I guess not.” You risked a glance at his face, only to be met with a sly smile and your heart beating rapidly. You quickly moved your gaze to the table.

“I never introduced myself. I- I’m (y/n).” You held out your hand for him to shake, but he only held it.

“And I am Loki, of Asguard.” With that he kissed the back of your hand, causing you to blush and avert your gaze.

He chuckled at the site, a shy young girl, clad in big bird pajamas, embarrassed by a simple greeting.

How sweet. He thought.

“Well, hello Loki.” You said nervously. After a moment of silence, you stood from your chair, heart racing, and attempted to push it in, but your foot got caught, making you fall into the black haired god.

Loki’s immediate reaction was to grab you, as he didn’t want you to get injured, and almost in slow motion he caught you under the arms before you could crack your head open.

The sudden stop and feeling under your arms made you tense, heart racing even faster, and no matter how much you tried to push out a “thank you”, you were simply too shocked.

Not to mention ticklish.

A squeak left your mouth as you tried to stand up on your own, pushing your feet on the ground, a smile threatening to break out upon your face.

“I- I- thank you, Loki. I’m good- I’m good.” You stutter out, feeling like a complete mess, the flush in your cheeks brighter than a light bulb.

Loki allowed you to stand on your own, amused at your embarrassment, watching you stand awkwardly.

“Are you ticklish?”

Wide eyes. Red face. Breath quickening. The usual. “I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You say, trying anything, anything at all to stray away from the inevitable.

“It’s okay. I won’t tickle you.”

Doubt and relief wash over you at the same time, battling each other in your head. Your breathing slows slightly, but your face is still a bright red. With a simple statement, so many emotions make their way to the front. Disappointment? You should not be disappointed that the god of Mischief will not peruse such childish behavior, and why would you want him to anyways? There’s embarrassment, why would you want him to? It’s not like you like it. And there’s the guilt and shame. Are you weird for this? Is this weird? You don’t want to make him uncomfortable if he were to ever find out you find joy in something so trivial, which you don’t, thank you very much.

Amidst your panic, you realized he had been watching you, almost observing you. His green eyes were a comfort in a sea of worry. They grounded you. His cheekbones were a pleasant distraction, too.

“Why do you feel so much shame?” He knew why you felt so much shame, but he wanted to understand it more. He felt a need to take away this anxiety, understand it more thoroughly.

“I- what? Shame?” Confusion took over your body, tilting your head and knitting your brows together. How did he know you felt something just by looking at you?

“I know you feel shame for enjoying tickling. Why is that? Are you embarrassed?”

Loki knew magic. Loki could read minds. He could work his way into your head just by looking at you, not dissimilar to the way he worked his way into your heart just by existing.

You felt fear, shame, so much shame, and even more embarrassment. “I- I promise it’s nothing weird, really! I was just thinking, and I was thinking too much, and then I thought about other stuff and I eventually just worried myself-“

Your ramblings were cut short by Loki interrupting you. “No need to feel embarrassed. I know you don’t want to make other people uncomfortable. Don’t worry, darling, you’re not making me uncomfortable.” He said with his soothing, quiet voice. You calmed down immediately, drawing slightly closer to him.

“I- I just think it’s cute…” You mumble quietly.

After a moments of hesitation, he answered with a smirk, “Well, that’s quite adorable.”

You look up to see his expression, face heating at his words. You scowl at him, barely able to meet his eye. “Shut up.” You say, sounding more like a child than you already are.

To Loki, you were a young girl with a scowl like a puppy, and one of the most adorable things he’d seen on earth. He’d have to ask Thor if they can keep it.

“Well now you’re embarrassed, which just further proves my point.” He was saying this just to rile you up, but it ended up working.

“Ugh, stop.” You complain while putting your burning face in your hands. A nervous giggle slipped through, only entertaining him more.

“What was that? A giggle? No one is even tickling you!” He said, walking closer to you.

You remove your hands from your face, saying, “I need to go to bed, Loki”, not once looking at his face.

“Well then, you sleep tight, Darling.” He says with a wink, allowing you to leave the kitchen with a red face.

Loki watched as you walked to your room, nervousness splayed across your body. No doubt in his mind did he think you were adorably precious.

#Loki #marvel #avengers #tickle #tickle fic #fluff #teen reader #fanfic #platonic

[cynergy-laughter]

Obey Me! One Master to Rule Them All! Headcanon #16

Thank you for the ask, anon! ^^ So, everybody is afraid of something, sometimes they are rational, and irrational. Not to get too Lemony Snicket on everyone, but these powerful demon bois have some pretty weird fears. Some are very specific. And yes, I will be including Luke in this.

Lucifer: Lucifer will never admit that he’s afraid of them, or afraid of anything... but he absolutely hates puppets. Just something about the way the look so soul-less, and if he’s looking at a ventriloquist dummy, and if the dummy shifts it’s eyes toward him, instant fire blast. Doesn’t even care about what room he’s in, whether something is highly flammable near it. He’s nipping this in the bud right here and now.

Mammon: We know the Great Frightened Mammon hates horror movies and pretty much any scary situation that seemed out of a horror movie. But he can’t stand scary movie soundtracks, or the sounds of an organ playing by itself. Just a scary situation, and then on top of it, music that fits the situation just makes his heart race, like he’s a character who dies in those movies.

Leviathan: He is the commander of Devildom’s Navy. He knows everything that the sea has. But, he absolutely hates flying. If Lucifer picks him up and flies him somewhere, or if you try to get him to fly on a plane, he is having none of it. I think it’s a control thing with him. (He rides a broom in his UR+ animation, but that’s cause he’s in control of the broom. It’s when he’s out of control that he freaks out.)

Satan: Is a bit harder to pinpoint an actual fear for him, cause he seems to be guided by anger as an emotion rather than fear. But that’s not to say that he doesn’t have a fear. I’d say he has a fear of birds. There was an incident... it involved funnel cake, on the beach, with a huge flock of seagulls... Mammon also kept instigating by throwing cheezits at Satan to keep them coming, and Satan chucked him into the sea, into a jellyfish forest... Lucifer was having the time of his life just watching them both.

Asmodeus: He is scared of wrinkles and mosquitos, cause those are things that he doesn’t want on his perfect skin, he can’t afford to be scratching his skin or letting his face droop. If he even sees a line that he either doesn’t recognize on his face, or that he didn’t construct with make up, he spends his whole day going through the face care obstacle course to tighten up that droop.

Beelzebub: Is another person who it’s hard to pinpoint his fe- Solomon’s cooking. Hands down, feet up, stomach turned, all the way around the house. There are just some things that Solomon should not be doing... and cooking is definitely one of them.

Belphegor: Used to be scared of being alone until the story happened... but all in all, Belphie isn’t really scared of anything... Maybe geese... yeah, Geese specifically. Geese exist to fight god, and that’s what he wants to do in life, geese can scare cows.

Diavolo: Diavolo would only admit this to MC, and Barbatos... he’s scared of spiders, which is why he always has Barbatos around to keep the cobwebs out of the corners. He doesn’t like webs either, webs mean there are spiders.

Barbatos: Rats. Barb hates rats. You are a powerful, dimension, time and reality bending demon and you are scared of Remy from Ratatouille.

Solomon: I heard a rumor that Solomon isn’t a big fan of clocks. And we’re talking like grandfather clocks, cuckoo clocks, any thing that has the rhythmic tick tocking. Reminds him of the passage of time.

Simeon: Simeon is pretty hard to read, even more so than Belphegor, so it’s exceptionally hard to pinpoint his fears. If it was anything, he would be afraid of something nonliving. I would say he fears the figure 8... what?! It’s vertical infinity, why couldn’t they have made it a different symbol?! He absolutely refuses to be the 8th person in a group chat or be in one of exactly 8

Luke: Snakes, ever since he heard about what happened to Eden, he gives snakes the side eye and shys away when a snake sticks its tongue out. The Indiana Jones movies also may have contributed to that...

#obey me #one master to rule them all #headcanon #obey me headcanons #obey me main character #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me solomon #obey me simeon #obey me luke #fears #silly fears #this is not to make fun of trauma or traumatic fears #if i offended you #i am so sorry #obey me comedy #i hope you enjoy

[pishufics]

study date(s)

"Bertholdt knows that he needs to start trying. It’s junior year, and he’d rather not stay stuck in the same class next year as a senior. If he fails the next test, he’s in some shit. So, he's going to ask you for help."

pairing - bertholdt hoover x reader

tags - high school au, fluff, humor, texting

warnings - none

author’s note -  this was just a one shot but i kept writing lol it kind of switches between you and bertholdt, but i don't directly say his thoughts, it's kind of like 2nd person omniscient if that's even a thing LOL

lmk how the texting reads, i'll change it if it's weird

reblogs and comments are appreciated ! mwah

ao3 

chapter 1 - two days

reinah: I swear if you don’t just ASK her

Do you want to be held back?

bertoto: relax okay i’ll do it :(

r: Okay, okay

Lmk how it goes

b: i never said i was asking today

Bertholdt sighs and locks his phone once he sees Reiner start to type a reply.

Bertholdt is struggling with English, which surprises him. He’s a good student in every other class, but the moment Mr. Ackermann starts talking, he finds himself dozing off, missing the lecture. Recently, though, he’s awake in class, but still not paying attention. All his focus is on you, who sat in the middle of the classroom while he sat in the back, due to his height (he didn’t really mind, though; better chance of not getting caught asleep).

One day, due to some miraculous occurrence, the short, stern teacher actually had the boy’s attention, but not for long.

“Does anyone have number three?” Mr. Ackermann asked. Bertholdt definitely didn’t. He hoped someone would raise their hand so the teacher wouldn’t resort to calling a random name.

To his relief, you did.

“I think what the author was trying to convey was…”

Bertholdt didn’t really get what you were saying, but he admired your intelligence. You knew the material and could explain it in detail, while he couldn’t even recall the book's name in question.

He started to admire more of your traits - he gazed as you would lightly, but briskly, tap your foot in frustration when you didn’t know an answer and smile at the way your face relaxed when you finally got it. Seeing your motivation in class kickstarted his.

Bertholdt knows that he needs to start trying. It’s junior year, and he’d rather not stay stuck in the same class next year as a senior. If he fails the next test, he’s in some shit.

So, he's going to ask you for help.

...Tomorrow.

-

“Girl, I don’t have any more fucking gum. I drove up to Costco, bought the value sized pack, and you somehow managed to chew all of it.” You say exasperatedly, shutting your locker.

Sasha pouts. “Are you sureeee? There’s prolly half a stick left in your front pocket…”

You swat her hand away. “There’s. Nothing. Left. I promise.” She continues to stare at your bag.

“Fuckin-” You mutter, reaching into your bag and pulling out a snack-size bag of Cheezits. They’re one of your favorite snacks, but you know you can’t win when it comes to Sasha and food. You reluctantly hand the bag to her.

“Thanks, y/n!” She smiles and tears open the bag.

“Yknow, you can be annoying as shit, Sasha.”

She winks at you and eats her stolen prize. You turn to leave and head to 3rd period. English.

Hm. You’re usually greeted by your other best friend around now-

“Yeoooo!!” Oh, there he is. Connie daps you up before wrapping his arm around your shoulders. “What’s good?”

“I don’t really wanna go to 3rd," you answer. "Sasha stole my Cheezits."

“Does anyone really wanna go to any class? And that's your fault, you know you can't bring food without Sasha's fatass taking it,” Connie replies, and Sasha punches his shoulder.

“Okay, I know...have you started studying for the test?”

He blankly stares at you. Guess not. You have the same teacher, but different periods, so you can’t keep an eye on him.

“Nevermind. I’ll see y’all later.” You throw up a peace sign and head in the opposite direction.

It’s not like you’re bad at English, but you just don’t like school in general. You go to class to get your participation grade, then go home.

There might be another reason you tolerate 3rd period, though, and it isn’t the professor. (He is pretty fine, but he's an adult, so you don’t let your thoughts escalate).

-

Mr. Ackermann didn’t like assigning things online, so most of the work in this class was on paper, contrasting your other classes where everything was digital. Kind of annoying, but you’ve learned to deal with it.

You mainly use mechanical pencils because you hate the way wooden ones write, but one day, to your slight dismay, you forgot them at home. Just your luck.

There’s a container of pencils and a sharpener in the back of the classroom, so you stand up to go retrieve one and notice a tall boy asleep in a desk not too far back from yours.

Bertholdt Hoover.

You knew him, of course. You find it a little rude to not know your classmates' names; you’ve dealt with numerous “who?”s in previous years and don’t want to put anyone through that, so you make sure to pay attention during introductions.

You chuckle at sight. The class has barely even started, and the guy is already dozing. In an awkward position, at that. One of his long legs is across the other, cramped underneath the desk. His head was laying on his right arm with his left against his hair. You thought to wake him up, but he looked so peaceful, you couldn't bring yourself to do it, plus, it's not your business. Mr Ackermann somehow didn't notice either, so Bertholdt always had a good rest in 3rd period English.

Every time you walked into class, you checked to see what weird position he would be sleeping in. You found yourself looking forward to it- he looked kinda cute when he was sleeping- but he stopped one day. You were a little disappointed, but glad to know that he was starting to pay attention in class. You still glanced at him as you walked in- he's a pretty attractive guy. No harm in just looking...

-

You shrug your backpack off and sit at your desk, stretching your legs out a bit. The walk from your locker to this classroom was kind of far. You reach into your bag, get your mechanical pencil out, and wait for Mr Ackermann to pass out the first assignment.

Just then, you hear someone walk up to your desk, and you glance over.

‘Oh, it’s Bertholdt. I don’t think we’ve ever spoken.’ You feel your face heat up, wondering what he wanted from you.

“Hey, y/n…” He nervously starts.

“Hey. Need something?”

“Yeah, actually...about the upcoming test.”

You hum in curiosity. “What about it?”

He clears his throat. “I’m lowkey failing this class, and if I mess up this test, I’ll have to retake this class next year. Do you think you could, uh…”

Bertholdt inhales in an attempt to calm himself down. It doesn’t really work.

“Could you help me study?” Phew. He managed to get it out pretty well and made a mental note to give himself a pat on the back later. But he hasn’t fully succeeded yet; you still need to agree.

You weren't opposed to the idea. You kind of figured he would be struggling in class a bit since he used to sleep all the time. It’s alright with you, and you wouldn’t mind a potential new friend. Sasha and Connie were exhausting at times.

“Yeah, sure. When?” You pause. “Actually, just text me.” You hold out your hand, asking for his phone.

Bertholdt was practically shaking in his sneakers as he reached into his pocket and handed you his unlocked phone with the contacts app open. You actually agreed! And you were giving him your number! Reiner was going to be so proud, he smiled to himself.

As you type in your info, you appreciate the cleanliness of his phone. That shows you that he’s at least hygienic.

“Aight. Here you go,” you return his device. “See you later.” You smile.

Bertholdt can’t believe this is happening.

Mr Ackermann’s voice interrupts his thoughts. “Oi, Hoover. Sit down.”

Startled, he jumps back a bit at the sudden acknowledgement. He was focused on you and tuned everything else out.

“Sorry, sir.” Bertholdt gives you a quick grin and turns to go back to his desk. Once he sits, he looks down at the new contact:

y/n :)

xxx-xxx-xxxx

Bertholdt can’t help but smile. Just seeing your name and number on his screen made him giddy, and he thought that the smiley face you added was adorable.

His thoughts are interrupted yet again, but not by the teacher. He looks down at his phone, which just buzzed.

| Messages

reinah

Did you do it yet bruh

Good timing. Bertholdt taps on the notification and goes to type a reply, but decides to send him a screenshot of your contact…with your number scribbled out. Reiner was a flirt, and he didn’t want to risk anything.

r: YOOOOOOOOOO HOLY SHIT U ACTUALLY DID IT

Bertholdt rolls his eyes and puts his phone in his backpack. He was going to pay attention- for real - today. He didn't want to seem too clueless when you tutored him.

“Can anyone tell me what rhetorical strategy is being used here?” Mr. Ackermann asked.

Bertholdt certainly could not. But that was changing soon, with your help.

--

“Okaay, we got Ms. Tutor over here now,” Sasha smiles in between bites of a burger.

“Do you even know how to, like, teach, though?” Connie gives you a skeptical look.

“It prolly isn’t too hard. All I gotta do is help him study. If he needs help understanding a concept, I’ll just explain it,” you defend yourself. “We still have two weeks. Ion mind making flashcards or something.”

“You’re getting into it, huh?” Sasha laughs.

Your face heats in embarrassment. “Girl, you know it isn’t like that.”

“And why not? You’re always bitching about how lonely you are. High school isn’t gonna last forever…” she replies.

“I have no recollection of saying anything like that.” You glare. But she isn’t exactly wrong. You’d like to experience the “high school romance” you’ve heard so much about, and Bertholdt is pretty cute. It’s not like dating is a significant concern, though.

“I’m always here as an option, y/n,” Connie winks as he takes a sip of his soda.

“Hell nah.”

Across the cafeteria, Bertholdt is trying to eat a sandwich, but Reiner won’t leave him alone. He was right about Reiner being proud, but Bertholdt almost forgot how persistent the jock could get.

“I didn’t think you had the balls, dude. I was ready to see English 3 on your schedule again next year,” He grins, arm around his taller friend's shoulders.

“...Can I eat?” Bertholdt sighs and shrugs his friend away.

“Have you texted her yet? What day are you gonna hang out with her? You gonna bring her anything? Flowers or somethin’? Girls like that kinda stuff.”

Bertholdt didn’t really think that was true.

“First off, no, not yet. I need to see when I can actually go. Second, no, I am not bringing her anything. I didn’t say it was a date. She’s going to help me study.”

“Fine, man. At least try to seem more interesting, yknow, so she can like...be interested in you.”

“Are you saying I’m boring? Ouch,” He jokingly pouts and rolls his eyes at Reiner’s double usage of ‘interesting.’

“You said it, not me.”

“Okay, I don’t wanna hear that from you...if it came from Annie, then I’d believe it.” Bertholdt looks in the blonde’s direction. She took a bite from her burger, looked up from her phone, and shrugged.

“Damn, for real?” Bertholdt sinks. He didn’t think he was that dull. He did lots of interesting stuff, like…

Like…

Bertholdt sighs in defeat.

“It’s fine. Maybe y/n likes boring,” Bertholdt huffs, taking another bite from his sandwich.

“Yeah, okay, keep telling yourself that and see where it gets you…” Reiner mumbles.

“Come again?”

“Nothing, man…”

School's been over for an hour or two. You’re aimlessly scrolling through your phone when you feel a buzz, and glance towards the top of the screen.

| Messages

xxx-xxx-xxxx

hey

it’s bertholdt 😁

where should we meet up?

Your heart starts to beat a little faster. ‘Relax, girl… don't act like he's asking you out or something,’ you tell yourself.

y/n: hey!

how abt the library?

+  what day/ time works for you?

You add his number to your contacts as you wait for his response.

bertholdt :^)

is saturday at 3 okay?

y/n: yep

do you need a ride or anything?

b: no, but thank you

see you then ☺️

y/n: alrighty :)

You smile at his use of emojis, send what he requested, then swipe down on your screen to check the day (what? It's normal to forget sometimes.) Wednesday. Two days.

You feel like it would be awkward to study with Bertholdt considering you aren’t really friends, so you decide to text him a little more so it isn't too bad when the day arrives.

----

“See? That wasn’t so hard!” Reiner exclaims. “You could’ve tried to talk to her more, but it went good!”

“I think it would’ve been weird if I did say anything else. Best to leave it at that…” Bertholdt exclaims, trying to calm himself down. He had two days.

He wonders what he should do now. Study so he could impress you? Do something to make himself seem more interesting? What would he even do...?

Bertholdt taps back onto the conversation to reread it for the 6th time. Was there anything he could’ve said different? Should he try asking you someth-

Oh, wait-? You’re typing?

“Oh shit- Dude, she’s saying something else. What do I do?” He begins to panic. Did you suddenly decide he wasn’t worth your time? Were you cancelling?

y/n: sooo

how’s your day been?

Whaaaaaatttt?? You actually...care to ask?

Bertholdt stared at his phone in surprise.

“What’d she say? Cmon! Don’t just look, dude!”

“She...asked how my day’s been-”

“-You gotta reply now! You were on the chat when she said it, so she knows you’ve read it!” Reiner urges.

Shit. He doesn't have enough time to think of a good reply.

good, but better since i’m texting you 😉|

The hell? No, that’s weird. And too soon. He tries again...

pretty good, thanks!

kinda stressing over the test, haha

how’s your day going?

There we go. He twiddles his thumbs as he waits for your reply.

y/n :)

oh, dw, it’ll be fine !

my day was okay

sasha took my last bag of cheez its :(

b: ah, i'm sorry abt that :(

+ yeah, you're right

have you as my tutor :)

“Nice job man! That was...kinda flirty? You’ll get there!” Reiner ruffles his hair in encouragement, and Bertholdt shoos him away. He stares at his phone in anticipation. Was that too much?

----

i have you as my tutor :)

You lean your head on your pillow and feel your face heat up at the compliment ( was that a compliment?)

It’s not like you’re dumb, so he’s not wrong to think that. Your lips curl into a smile as you reread the message. But how do you reply? Should you compliment him back? You don’t really know.

if you’re saying i’m smart, thank you :))

hoping that wasn't sarcasm lol

You wait a minute, and he doesn’t reply, so you decide to ask another question.

is there anything specific you wanna focus on?

You cringe at the double texting, but hope that it doesn't make him think you're weird. You swipe away from the conversation and scroll on various apps as you wait.

b: ofc it wasn’t sarcasm, you're really smart, y/n!

i'm mainly struggling with rhetorical strategies and logical fallacies, but i could

use a general review too

if that's okay with you

You bury your almost overheating face into your pillow. Why is something like that getting you flustered, you wonder. You sit up, take a deep breath, and focus on the second part of his message. You're pretty good with what he needs work on, and a general review should be easy to put together.

y/n :) okay, we can focus on the first 2 on saturday

we can review the unit on other days

see you at school:)

At this point, you really don’t know how this conversation could go any further, so you ended it. Bertholdt returns your goodbye.

You exhale and sit up in your bed. Hopefully tutoring him won’t be too awkward now that you’ve spoken to him a bit, and there's still tomorrow at school to speak to him. You find yourself excited for the study date tutoring session, since you could get your homework done too.

"Two days," you smile.

#bertholdt x reader #bertholdt hoover #bertolt hoover #bertolt fubar #high school au #texting #aot #attack on titan #shinkegi no kyojin #bertholdt fubar #ao3 #fanfic

[katara0524]

Impromptu Ramblings about the NEO:TWEWY Demo

In case y'all weren't aware, I've been a pretty big fan of TWEWY for a couple years now, and with the sequel coming out next month, the excitement I feel for this game is greater than ever :) I played the Demo for the first time yesterday, and following a couple views of some livestreams of others playing it, I felt like sharing my (very ramble-y) thoughts prior to the release of the full game. This post WILL contain spoilers for both TWEWY and NEO:TWEWY, so if you want to avoid those from now on, please block the tags: #twewy spoilers, #ntwewy spoilers, #neo twewy spoilers, #ntwewy, and #neo twewy ^_^ Oh, and if you wanna keep up with any other posts I make about my experience with this game, please refer to the tag "kat plays neo twewy" :)

-First things first: I have not watched the Final Trailer and I don't plan on doing so to avoid spoilers, especially after the pre-release era of KH3 where a lot of the later trailers spoiled a lot of the endgame content. That being said, I've seen some minor screenshots from the final trailer including what many believe to be characters from the original TWEWY, namely Shiki and Joshua. That is all I know about the Final Trailer and I would very much like to remain as blind as possible going into NEO :)

-The very first cutscene was quite ominous in the sense that this game is likely going to be about "changing fate" (a recently common theme in Squeenix games, which I do appreciate), perhaps leading off from the end of A New Day in the OG and trying to stop an Inversion of Shibuya. Also worth noting that A New Day had similar aspects in which the main character experienced "future visions" of tragic events, although in A New Day these events were not able to be changed, while in NEO it seems like one of the main "powers" our protagonist has is specifically to rewrite these events and avoid a "bad ending." Very interesting indeed!

-I really like the revamped comic book style dialogue scenes, it's much more fluid and modern, which is an excellent direction for the series to take!

-I would love to have an actual PokemonGO knockoff of Final Fantasy creatures, please Squeenix that would be incredibleeeeee

-Also the LINE stickers??? Are so cute???

-I would just like to point out that Fret is an absolute treasure throughout this entire demo, he's hilarious and I will protect him with my life

-UHHHH don't like that Fret picked up some Reaper Pins just out of nowhere.....or the fact that they're apparently popular all over Shibuya.............did y'all not learn anything from the OG game or what lmao

-Okay so when I first got the "curry or ramen" scene and heard NPCs talking about the new curry place replacing the old ramen place I became IMMENSELY distressed that Ramen Don was totally cut from the game because....well, Ramen Don is a King okay?? But I'm glad to learn that no, he didn't fall off the face of the earth, he's still in business and he's the one opening the curry restaurant lolol. PHEW, crisis averted!

-.....I don't like the sudden appearance of a Wall Reaper and being able to read NPC thoughts. Wtf happened when they left the ramen place??? Are they playing the Game alive somehow?

-Okay so I have my own theories about this "Swallow" character and what they're up to but considering this is only the Demo and I still Have No Idea What's Happening, I'm just gonna say that I think Swallow intentionally led Rindo and Fret to the Crossing so they could join the Game. I mean, add in the fact that Swallow still communicates with Rindo during the Game and you've got yourself a suspicious character right there lol

-"Hey they're shooting off fireworks!" Fret honey that's not fireworks oof (see also: "*laughs* I'm in danger")

-WOOOOOO way to traumatize Rindo right off the bat like that LMAOO

-The visuals for the intro are VERY GOOD, the song is pretty decent until it gets all "screamo" (which I absolutely cannot stand sorry lol)

-Shoka is every Customer Service employee ever and I respect that

-Susukichi went from being "meh" to "WOW THIS GUY IS FUN" in the span of 10 seconds and I also respect that (he is also built like an Absolute Unit which is hilarious)

-The Wall Reapers (and just Reapers in general) seem.....way nicer and more helpful this time around?? Like in the OG the Wall Reapers were SO RUDE gfhjgjdfkhn and yeah I'm sure we'll get some like that but the juxtaposition of the first Wall Reaper in the OG compared to the first one in NEO is insane.

-The puzzles are quite a bit more entertaining this time around even if it's generally the same "fetch quest" formula lol

-"Rindo's Group" way to go Fret HFKJDGHSDFKJ mans really left the default name in there lmao

-OKAYOKAYOKAY so to those who aren't aware I am a MASSIVE SIMP for Sho Minamimoto, he's my absolute favorite and I think about him daily. HIS INTRODUCTION IS. INCREDIBLE. I LOVE IT SM.

-GOD hearing him actually SPEAK FULL SENTENCES is just SO SURREAL I love this sm

-Also the remix of his theme???? NEO TRANSFORMATION????? IT'S SO GOOD????????? It's like gone from a Boss Theme to a more triumphant sounding theme and I am HERE for it (every version of Transformation is just INCREDIBLE and getting a new one is even better)

-I Love Him, Your Honor

-Also idk how exactly but it's kinda weird seeing Sho in the OG vs NEO, cuz while he's mostly the same Insane Math-Obsessed Catboy, he's.....calmed down quite a bit?? Like OG made a whole point of how poorly he cooperates with others (not to mention just being completely unhinged and trying to kill everyone), whereas here in NEO he's......actually kinda working with others??? HELLO???? Sir what happened to you and Neku during those 3 years I would love to know all about it

-I guarantee you Sho is still probably scheming shite and will likely pull some total insane BS later down the road, and I am very much looking forward to that. Also, is he looking for a certain Pin or something??? Cuz he keeps talking about different Pins and even mentions "this is just another Psych Pin" like he's actively looking for a Pin to do something with. Maybe it also has to do with the "latent powers of Players" thing he mentioned as well??? What is this dude UP TO oml (also is he in contact with Neku at all?? they're both technically fugitives at this point right?? WHAT HAPPENED AFTER A NEW DAY I AM BEGGING YOU)

-I seems like Sho ALSO has an idea of what's going on in this specific game (even if he won't admit it straightforward). Per his quote "The game's 142,857. Factor it out," he's essentially saying, "This game is a neverending cyle, figure out how to get out of it" (or at least that's what I got from his "cyclic number" nonsense lolol)

-I do like how Sho mostly stays out of sight until he's needed for a battle or assisting with a mission, that's kind of on par with his whole "uncooperative" quirk from the OG, plus he might literally have to stay out of sight of other Reapers and Players considering he's likely breaking the rules of the Game (not surprising considering him and Neku broke practically every rule in the book during OG)

-The nicknames for Sho- I can't- They're so FUNNYYYY GFHJSDFKJ

-He goes from being called "Pi-Face" and "Tabooty" in OG to "Mr. Minami" and "M-Teezy" in NEO LMAOO

-(Wowee I just realized I've been mostly talking about Sho oopsies sorry y'all, this is what I meant by thinking about him almost daily he is THAT much of a fav of mine ghfkjsd)

-Okay RIP Fret and Rindo for not getting literally ANY explanation as to how the Game works OOF, that is kinda cringe that whoever gets the Pin earns points, not whoever erases the Noise (which like I understand but also URRRGGHHH I WANNA SEE THE SQUAD SUCCEED)

-"I should be going home now it's getting late" Oh you sweet summer child-

-Also love the mention of parents in this game???? KH you could learn a thing or two from TWEWY (poor Rindo's mom fhgjkdh)

-KUBO IS HILARIOUS I SUPPORT HIM AND HIS GROSS FACE (also thank you Final Trailer thumbnail for spoiling my suspicions about him very cool smh)

-Kaie is a LAD I also support him, go King type those funky texts I believe in you

-FRET PLS STOP SCANNING FHGJKSDHKJFGHFKJ he's like me when I scan in OG during Weeks 2 and 3 and see Taboo Noise coming after me ghfjdshfj

-Also Rindo can you stay off your phone for TWO SECONDS ik you're trying to figure things out but Fret is a jelly boi and I don't want him to be upset with you my guy

-Sho being an actual sorta mentor to the kiddos?? Who are you sir this is so unlike you ghfgskj what happened to the guy who tried shooting children in the face 8 times over LMAO (granted he's probably just using them but it's still nice to see him actually cooperating and sharing knowledge with the kiddos aaaaa)

-EYO EIJI OJI THE TIKTOK INFLUENCER IS BACK LMAO

-hgjkfshgkjf "we aren't glorifying capitalism on my watch" THATS SO FUNNY TO ME GFHJFSDGHJKS (also an all-orange ensemble is disgusting you deserve jail for one thousand years fkn Cheddar Goldfish Cheezit ass woman)

-WICKED TWISTERS NAME DROP EYOOO we love to see it

-gfhsgjf Poor Rindo embarassing himself for the sake of the Game that's incredible

-R e t u r n t o M O N K E. That is all.

-Dialogue during boss battles is HELLA cool i love that

-HHHHH THE KANON SCENE MADE ME A N G E R Y FRET STOP SIMPING MY GUY says the girl with a Literal Simp Encyclopedia and simps for pixels on a screen daily

-Can't wait to see the other Reapers :eyes emoji:

-CAN'T WAIT TO SEE NAGI MY BELOVED YEAHHHH WOOOOOO AAAAND that's about it for the demo lolol, I absolutely CANNOT wait for next month, this game is gonna be INCREDIBLE holy hell Prepare for more simping, more screaming, and more vibing from Yours Truly :) I fully intend on sharing more general thoughts like this on both Tumblr and Twitter so it's not just reblog-retweet-reblog-retweet with the occasional comment fhgskjd

If you wanna witness my insanity up close and personal I have a Square Enix Discord server called Sea Side Dreamers! You can look it up on Disboard, or you can add me on Discord @Katara0524#9244 for a direct link :) We have topics about Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, NieR, and ofc TWEWY (as well as other topics!), so if you want some good ol' chaos and chitchat, you're more than welcome to join!

#neo twewy #ntwewy #neo twewy spoilers #ntwewy spoilers #twewy #neo: the world ends with you #the world ends with you #twewy spoilers #twewy rindo #rindo kanade #twewy fret #tosai furesawa #twewy sho #sho minamimoto #long post #also shameless Discord plug lmaooo #kat plays neo twewy

[daydreamingjester]

{ OOC } as much as I love to portray glitchrag going the hell at it like two bunnies fighting for the last cheezit in the box I will never stop thinking of this one singular scene in mind

Ragdoll: going off for the hundredth time

Glitch: You only hate me because I force you to see the skeletons crawling out of your closet.

Ragdoll:

Ragdoll: What ?

Glitch: Am I wrong? I don’t believe I’m wrong. In fact, I’m almost certain I’m right. That’s the only reason why you lash out at me when I don’t even show any signs of hostility nor words. All I have to do is exist for you to fall victim to peril. Tragedy.

Ragdoll: You — You RUINED my LIFE. YOU RUINED E V E R Y T H I N G —

Glitch: No.

Glitch: Y o u ruined everything. You ruined your o w n life all by yourself and want to project that blame onto me now.

Glitch: If you hadn’t noticed, friend,

Glitch: Even without me there to instigate,

Glitch: You’re still ruining your own life as we speak.

Ragdoll: …

Glitch: Precisely. Deep down, you know it to be true as well. This isn’t blackmail.

This is proof that you never change.

#out of clowns ! #🌟 VENDETTA. 🌟 #hm.

[just-a-demi-bean]

Earlier today I was joking around with some friends, being self deprecating and shit. It gradually became more serious, and I ended up talking to her about things that I carry around a lot and she did the same and we were agreeing with each other and it was actually really nice. I told her about how sometimes my mindset makes myself think that even when people compliment me I think they’re lying to me and that they don’t really think that way. She agreed with me, mentioned some shit, and I agreed with her. We told each other that we appreciate each other even if we can’t appreciate ourself. It was really nice. I find it hard to open up, and it felt really

(Also my friend privately told me to love myself and to drink hot cocoa and steal my sister’s cheezits so that was nice)

Unfortunately for my stupid ass I was talking about this on a group chat. Another girl came on, agreed with us, we had about a minute and a half of pure agreement and appreciation, and it was great, and then another one of my friends goes online and starts texting us.

A bit about this friend of mine - he’s smart, but he’s smart in the way that he dresses up his words to make himself sound smarter. He doesn’t put his intelligence into words that normal people can comprehend. He likes to argue and pick fights and he never admits he’s wrong. Normally, I can push it aside and think it’s okay, because he can be really sweet and sometimes he has good intentions.

Back to the compliment thing–when people compliment me, I turn it against myself. I think they’re lying. I think they don’t really mean it. Or, I tell myself I don’t deserve it. Because I don’t think I do. It’s not a mindset I enjoy, and it’s not like I can change it. It’s just what I think. I’ve built up walls and although I know they’re not good ones I don’t want to tear them down. Because they’re there for a reason.

So this guy. He tells me, and I quote, “Wait - so if you don’t respect urself and we respect ur opinions - does that mean we shouldn’t respect ur opinions and thus respect u?”

wtf.

How thE FUCK DID YOU COME TO THAT CONCLUSION.

“But then that’s basically a lack of trust because to do so you would have to feel that the opinion has no validity”

Basically, if you don’t understand what he’s saying, he’s saying that because I DON’T BELIEVE WHAT HE’S SAYING, it means that I DON’T TRUST HIM.

He goes on to say that IF I RESPECT ANY OF HIS OPINIONS then I MUST BELIEVE THAT I AM A GOOD PERSON.

That’s not how it fucking works. Just because I don’t agree with you, you fucking pretentious little prick, doesn’t mean I don’t trust you or respect your opinions.

“I’m saying that if you hate yourself then you believe that our arguments are without any validity and thus our arguments (and character) are invalid” JUST BECAUSE I DON’T AGREE WITH YOU ABOUT ONE THING, ONE FUCKING THING, DOES NOT MEAN THAT I THINK ALL OF YOUR ARGUMENTS ARE INVALID.

He said that I DON’T TRUST HIM because I HATE MYSELF.

Buddy, that is the LAST THING I’M SAYING.

I was being fucking open. I was talking about my problems and the weights that I’ve carried around for literal years. I was being fucking vulnerable and it FELT FUCKING GOOD.

I was talking about a mentality that I’ve had for most of my life. How I DON’T BELIEVE I DESERVE LOVE OR AFFECTION OR PRAISE. Because I DON’T. And I KNOW IT’S PROBLEM AND I’M TALKING ABOUT IT AND THAT’S FUCKING DIFFICULT FOR ME.

AND HE JUST FUCKING TURNS IT INTO AN ARGUMENT???

He’s said that I don’t trust my friends? That I think his opinions are invalid? That I think his arguments are wrong? When I was open enough to tell him about how I felt?

Some more shit he said:

- “So our arguments have no basis except the ones you agree with?”

- called my mentality “problematic” yeah buddy I KNOW you don’t have to make it sound like like

- when I confirmed that what he said was that I think his arguments are invalid because I have a mental issue, he told me that I had the wrong takeaway.

I’m sorry. I’m fucking pissed off right now.

[bigoltrashpile]

I see asks are closed, so you can delete or backlog this--whatever you want, but I wanted to say that your horrortale bois sound adorable and if you ever feel up to it would you give us some brotherly headcanon shenanigans? Again it is totally cool if you're not accepting things now. I just wanted to slide this idea into your brain for later. Have a good one!

I’ll accept this ask, simply because it’s adorable, and it was close enough to Sunday that it’s fine

Sugar was pissed.  Well, not pissed, that’s a bit...vulgar.  He was just frustrated.  No matter how hard he looked, he just couldn’t find his favorite snack!  He knew he shouldn’t be eating Cheezits with braces on, but could you blame him?  A life without Cheezits was not a life worth living.

He poked his head into the living room, eyebrows furrowed with confusion.  “SANS, HAVE YOU SEEN MY-” he paused.  There in Saint’s skull, very clearly poking out of his crack, was a familiar red box.  Saint stared back at him, his single eyelight wide.

Sugar stepped into the living room fully.  “SANS,” he said warningly.  “WHAT HAVE WE SAID ABOUT HOARDING FOOD?”

“......not to do it,” Saint sheepishly said, not meeting Sugar’s eyes.

“THAT’S RIGHT.  WE ARE ON THE SURFACE, AND DON’T NEED TO.  NOW, GIVE ME BACK MY CRACKERS.”

Saint seemed to think about it.  “...nah.”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN, ‘NAH’?” Sugar shrieked, throwing his hands in the air.  “THEY’RE MINE, I PUT A STICKY NOTE THAT SAID, ‘SUGAR’S CHEEZITS, PROPERTY OF SUGAR, DO NOT TOUCH UNLESS YOU ARE SUGAR’!”

“true,” Saint admitted.  “...but it’s...funny...seeing you mad.”

Sugar huffed and crossed his arms, but couldn’t deny that it was hard to keep a smile off his face.  Saint just looked so please with himself, a small smile turning his sharp teeth up happily.

“I WILL GIVE YOU UNTIL THE COUNT OF THREE,” Sugar threatened.  “ONE...TWO...”

Instead of waiting for three, Saint vanished.  Sugar knew he was probably still in the house, he couldn’t teleport too far after his...accident.  Sugar shoved aside the negative thoughts and raced to Sans’s room.

Sure enough, there he was, laying on his bed, eating some of Sugar’s precious crackers.  Sugar let out a loud war cry, racing towards Saint.  Unfortunately, he vanished just as Sugar reached the bed.  

Sugar huffed and whipped around, seeing Saint right behind him, a smug grin on his face.  He held the box out to Sugar, and the taller skeleton quickly grabbed it.

“THANK YOU,” Sugar snarked.  “IF YOU WANTED SOME, YOU COULD HAVE JUST ASKED.”

“yeah, i know,” Saint nodded.  “this was...funnier, though.”

Sugar fought to keep a grin off his face.  “AT LEAST ONE OF US ENJOYED THEMSELVES.”

#if fontcest shippers even fucking LOOK at this #i will stomp you to death with my hooves #undertale #undertale imagines #writing #horrortale #sans #papyrus #saint #sugar #fluff #my garbage

[babblingbonky]

for the drabble/hc thing: Bucky asking the reader their "pussy size" when buying them pads/tampons so he gets the right ones

okay so before i start i just wanna say the wording of this really got to me at first bc all i saw at first was “pussy size” and laughed aUDIBLY

but then i kept reading and it made more sense and i actually love this idea

But the wording really got me

anyways 

on to the actual hc

.

.

.

it had been a long day

there was a lot going on at work, schoolwork was demanding to be done, and your apartment was begging to be cleaned

on top of that, you haven't been feeling well for the past few days 

all you wanted was to curl up on the couch in sweats with Bucky and watch movies and cuddle

and that's exactly what you did

until he felt your body tense and you curled up into a tighter ball 

"what's the matter, doll?"

"oh, it's nothing"

"y/n…"

"what? it's just cramps, they'll go away soon" 

"doll... it's not just cramps" he said, pointing to the bright red spot that was forming on the blanket

"oh Buck, I'm so sorry. I'll fix-"

"no, don't worry about it. go take a hot bath and relax. there are some towels already in the dryer so when you're finished I'll bring you one."

"Bucky really it's not-" 

"please?" he pleaded 

and you didn't have the energy to fight him on it, so you did as you were told

you start up a hot bath and begin to get undressed when Bucky knocks on the door 

"I brought you some tea" he said as he set it down on the sink

"thank you" you smiled

"anytime" and he pecked your lips "while I was making you tea, I remembered that you ran out of… girl stuff, so I'm gonna run to the store real quick to get you some."

"thank you Bucky" you wrapped your hands around his neck. "I love you." and you kiss him again.

"I love you. I'll be back shortly. do you want anything else while I'm there?"

"maybe some cookie dough ice cream? and some cheezits please" 

"you got it" 

"thank youuu I love you"

"love you too" 

you settled in the tub and turned on some music as you relaxed

but little did you know how stressed out Bucky was

not because there was a stain or you were getting your period- that stuff didn't matter

he forgot what kind of girl stuff you used

so he spent a solid 10 minutes in the feminine hygiene aisle before he decided to call you

"hello? Bucky?"

"hi honey, I.. uh, I'm at the store."

"and?"

"you need the girl stuff."

he tried so hard to get around it but you were being difficult and oblivious 

"yeahhh that's why you went to the story, isn't it?" you laughed

"I mean… yeah… but i don't…"

"you don't what, Buck?"

"doll what's your pussy size I just wanna get the right ones. I've been here for 10 minutes trying to figure it out but I didn't know what the difference between super and regular and I almost got both but I just-"

you almost choked on tea when you heard what he said

"woah woah woah, Bucky. what'd you ask?" 

"what's your pussy size?"

you laughed again at that phrase because it was not something Bucky would usually say

and he realized that too after he said it and started laughing with you

"come on. which one do you want so I can grab your ice cream and cheezits and get home?"

"just a box of regular."

and after he grabbed the rest of your things and checked out, he was on his way home

when Bucky got home, you were finishing up in the tub

and as promised, he gave you a warm towel for as soon as you got out

along with a t shirt and a pair of sweatpants that were his that were also in the dryer

before you even got to say anything, he said

"you always say they're looser and more comfortable than your clothes, so I figured that'd be what you wanted right about now" 

and by the time you were done in the bathroom he had set up the heating pad for you, grabbed another fuzzy blanket and some fuzzy socks, and queued up your favorite movie. your snacks were all out on the table and he was setting down another glass of hot tea

all for you

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #headcanon #request

[nyxicnymph]

Horizon and Edge

#3: Different people, different places

Hailey:

I wake up and stare at the ceiling. After apologizing to Edge last night, I definitely feel better.

I roll out of bed and get ready for school. Kaylee said that she and Beth have been planning something for me. And that I’ll get to see--Ooh, shorts over leggings, very nice--I’ll get to see it today.  

At school, Beth and Kay are super excited. I wish they would just tell me what’s going on. If I know that there is a surprise, I hate it. I’m also a naturally jumpy person, and hate surprises in general. And people. And social events. And convention, tradition, stereotypes, and all things normal. AGGG! I will never adjust to normal society!

Okay, ignore the diatribe.

I breeze through math, which is unusual. I usually struggle, and there is much throwing of pencils. Then I get lectured for throwing the thirty-cents-worth of pencil.

Science was science. English made me want to scream obscenities in French, and German. Not that I know any swear words in German, but still... AGH! MUFFIN-FUDGING ENGLISH THREE!!!!

Anyway, after school, I’m just sitting on the steps. Beth and Kay come out of the monstrous building that is our school, and tell me to follow them. I do so, wondering what they’re going to show me.

Thirty minutes later, we are standing in front of a... tiny house. It’s a tiny house. AHHAHHAHHAH-HAHHAHHAH!!

“Nice clubhouse,” I remark.

Behind me, I hear Beth ask, “Kaylee, are you all right?”

Kaylee bursts out: “IT’S NOT A CLUBHOUSE! It’s a place for us and our friends to get together and hang out! To play games and do homework and to get to know each other! It’s not a clubhouse!”

“Okay.” I turn to Beth. “So... it’s basically a clubhouse?”

Beth nods. “Yeah, pretty much. She just won’t admit it.”

“OMIGOSH IT’S NOT A FREAKING CLUBHOUSE!!!!” Kaylee explodes.

I laugh, and pat her on the shoulder, then I walk in. I almost run into Rick, who is one of the two guys that the girls introduced me to yesterday. The other guy is really grumpy. His name is Cole.

“Sorry!” I exclaim, trying to get around. He blocks me.

“Nice to see you again. Kaylee brought you here?” He asks.

Agh, why must people speak to me?! “Yes,” I say, then duck underneath his arm. Both thank the cheezits for and curse the muffin-fudging tall people!

I take in the room. Clearly, the tiny clubhouse only has one room. There’s an old couch, some old tables, an old fridge, etc. Clearly, most of this stuff is third- or even fourth-hand furniture. Probably from the Quintants’ parents.

I see Cole. He sees me. He waves at me, and says, “Hi, Persephone.”

PERSPHONE??!!

I clear my throat. “Excuse me, but that’s not my name.”

“All right, Persephone.”

“DON’T CALL ME PERSEPHONE!!!”

“Yes, Persephone.”

I yell in frustration, and walk to the other end of the room. Until I see Erik. Then I stop walking, and just stand there. I feel dumb, but...

1. I don’t like Erik very much.

2. I don’t like boys very much.

3. I don’t know these kids very well.

4. I don’t exactly know why I’m here.

5. I’m not a social person.

6. Bethany and Kaylee are talking to Rick, and I don’t want to talk to him again.

7. Better to feel dumb and not talk to people you don’t want to talk to, then to talk to them and dislike them even more.

8. It’s a small clubhouse, and I don’t have anywhere else to go.

Anyway, I’m not talking.

I glance at one of the tables, and sit down at it. Then I pull out my sketchbook, and some pencils. I might as well do something.

I’m getting along pretty well, drawing my favorite horse, Stella, being tended to by James, our ranch-hand, until I sense someone behind me, watching me. I turn around, and see Rick. He is really close.

“Um...” I can’t say anything else. I can’t talk to boys, except to yell at them for being dumb. Never have. Well, I can do it to Liam, but he’s my brother. Different circumstances.

Rick starts, then turns bright red. His hair is a subdued brown red, so he looks kind of like an upside-down fence post.

“Sorry,” he says, “I was just looking. You draw really well.”

Suddenly, my tongue is loosened. “It’s not star quality.”

He brightens, like he wasn’t expecting me to speak, but now that I have, maybe we can get along.

We’ll see.

“It’s better than mine. I prefer to draw stick figures, and horses never show up. How did you get so good?” He asks. He’s genuinely curious. I suppose I better tell him. Lying’s not my shtick, anyway.

“Well, I’ve lived on a ranch for most of my life. So, besides doing all my chores, and amassing useful skills, I began to draw in my small amounts of free time. Growing up on a ranch gives a good idea of how any kind of body works, so I began to start drawing people and animals. I’m also fairly decent at landscapes, though not at the same level as my people.” I stop for a breath, and to see if he wants to add something to the conversation.

Because that’s how conversation works.

Rick looks at me. “You grew up on a ranch?”

“I did MOST of my growing up on a ranch. I’m finishing my growing up here in the City,” I correct him.

“Right, right, of course. But I guess that explains your ‘different-type-of-girl’ aura.”

“Um, aura?” I question. “You mean how I carry myself, right? Because I don’t believe in magic and stuff like that.” And I don’t glow.

Rick nods. “Yeah, it’s in the way you carry yourself, the way you look at problems and find solutions, the way you interact with people.”

“Cautiously?”

“Um, yeah. Though that’s really an understatement. You are clearly used to non-human companionship.” He laughs. “You actually seem afraid of people.”

I cringe. “That obvious, huh?” I sigh. “It’s more of a fear of... not understanding them. I was raised differently, even from other kids on ranches, and I know it. I’m more afraid of not understanding society, but at the same time, I kind of... embrace it.”

Rick shrugs. “Hey, I understand embracing the unconventional. I’m different, too. Even from my family. But you are like... thirteen times as different.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Thirteen? Really embracing the unconventional, aren’t we?”

He laughs.

**********************************************

Later, I’m out wandering. I told my parents, I have a GPS, and I told them I’d probably be home by ten o’clock. I’m set.

As I turn down a dark street, I see a patch of light that stands out. Naturally. But I mean, it’s different from the other patches, like those from streetlamps.

I step closer, and look at it from a closer distance. It seems more like it’s moving light, or moving light and sound. Or just a really bright flashlight.

I creep a little closer. It doesn’t seem to change. It’s really bright...

I accidentally touch it, and get sucked down into a mess of sound and light distortion. As I land on a hard surface, I hear someone shouting:

“Welcome to the Never-Ending Show!”

Oh, no.

#horizon and edge #h&e #hailey jardin #kaylee quintant #bethany harvord #my story #original story #send me asks #erik quintant #rick todson #cole myenah

[pcttrailsidereader]

Four Months Alone of the PCT

I posted this on this website about six years ago and just recently re-read this interview from a blog called ‘The Hairpin’.  The interview, with Myla Fay, a 25-year old thru hiker, is a good read and I thought worth re-posting.  My favorite story was her account of the hiker who found chapstick on the ground and used it to counter crotch chafing. A few minutes later a woman walked by and asked if anyone had seen her pina colada chapstick. From that point forward his trail name was “Penis Colada.”

Myla attended Carleton College in Northfield, Minnesota as did my daughter … which came to light when I forwarded this interview to my daughter as part of my desire to have her hike a section of the PCT several summers ago (which she did join me for a lengthy stretch).

By Jia Tolentino

How did you get into long-distance hiking? I grew up in Maine and spent a lot of time outside, and when I was a kid, we went up to Blue Hill every summer to hike and swim, camping in Baxter State Park and backpacking in the White Mountains. And in high school I did some incredible trips with the Chewonki Foundation: one was a 400-mile white-water canoe trip that ended in the tiny Inuit village of Kangiqsualujjuaq in northern Quebec. I always liked the outdoors, and backpacking felt like a good fit. I was also always interested in long-distance hiking as a more structured way of traveling. I spent a summer alone in India once and felt overwhelmed by all the decisions and planning involved in traveling. With hiking, your trip is organized around managing food and water and covering distance, and there’s less of an expectation for fun and relaxation. I like the part of backpacking that’s monotonous and challenging. How long had you been thinking about hiking the PCT before doing it? I heard about the PCT my senior year in college, but during and after college I was focusing on school and work: I worked as a designer in Minneapolis and New York, which I liked. Then I wanted to work on my own projects, so I moved back to Maine and set up a printmaking studio in the basement of a rural Zen Center. But it’s difficult to make any money from printmaking and it’s also difficult to live and work in isolation. I felt unsure about what I wanted to do, so I made a list of things I never regret doing. I realized that I never regret spending time outside, traveling, and challenging myself, so I decided to hike. I don’t think any 90-year-old would look back on life and regret hiking the PCT. Did you know you wanted to go alone? I might have considered it if I had known someone willing to drop everything and go hiking for four months. But I liked the idea of hiking alone anyway. Being alone is wonderful because you never have to compromise. If I felt like swimming all day, that’s what I did.

How long did it take to get ready? I only had about three months to prepare. Most people spend around six to 12 months getting in shape, dehydrating food, and planning. For me, I bought gear and read “Yogi’s Guide,“ which has advice for thru hiking—tips for hitchhiking, choosing campsites, resupplying, etc. It also outlines motel and grocery options for each town. I bought my food in towns and mailed food ahead when the next town was too small to resupply.

Do you have to be in good shape before you start a hike like this? Or could you just tough it out and get better as you go? You don’t have to be in good shape to start a hike, but it helps. It also helps to be young. No matter what shape you are in, hiking 10 to 12 hours a day is going to be hard. I thought that after hiking for a week or two I would just be “in shape,” but I was surprised that my fitness continued to improve.

I also never stopped having some degree of pain.

What was the gear you started with and the gear you ended with? Anything you packed that you realized was useless? I started hiking in desert heat and ended my trip snowshoeing through six feet of snow, but surprisingly I used most of my gear in all situations. After a month I bought a solar charger on trail to charge my iPhone, which was a real luxury. I also bought a dress from Goodwill along the way. It was comfortable to wear hiking and convenient for peeing outside modestly. I added various warm layers as I went north—a rain skirt (which is lighter, more breathable, and easier to put on than rain pants), an emergency blanket, snowshoes, long underwear, and bread bags to wear on my feet for warmth. I eventually ditched my mace, bug spray, and a mouse-proof food bag because I felt they were unnecessary, but not everyone would agree. Now that I have a better idea of what I need, I revamped my gear for my upcoming trip on the CDT. I have a post on my blog about the new gear, and also have my gear list on my website, if anyone wants to read.

What about trail food? How’d you deal with it? Did you filter your water the whole time? What are the worst and best things you’ve tried on the trail? Food was hard to plan for because my preferences and hunger changed constantly. Sometimes I had five extra pounds of food when I arrived in town and other times I ran out. One of the benefits of buying food as you go (rather than mailing it) is that you can easily make adjustments. I hiked with a girl who mailed all her food and by the end, she literally gagged every time she ate a Clif bar or oatmeal. I think having a variety of food on trail is important. I cooked ramen with PBR once when I arrived at a road crossing where someone had left a few beers for hikers. I was out of water, so I used the beer, and it was surprisingly delicious. At the end of trail, I ate snickers dipped in cream cheese and I thought it tasted like chocolate cheesecake! One of the worst things I tried was cold instant coffee mixed with oats. I was trying to pack up quickly in the morning and didn’t want to heat water. Needless to say, it was disgusting. I also once ate a spoonful of dry protein powder at night because I was starving and low on food. It felt similar to the cinnamon challenge. How much more do you end up eating than normal? What are the cravings you develop after long hikes? I ate a TON of food. Granola bars, mini pies, peanut butter, Nutella, tortillas, ramen, Cheezits, candy, muffins (squished), pop tarts, nuts, and anything else that caught my eye in the grocery store. All hikers fantasize about food, mostly about fresh fruits, vegetables, pizza, and ice cream. I daydreamed about Slurpees a lot. There is no food guilt on trail. All notions of what, when, and how much is appropriate to eat disappear. Instead of cutting calories and dieting, hikers worry about not eating enough. I ate 3,000 to 6,000 calories a day, and it was incredibly refreshing. The downside of eating so much was the stomach aches. Sometimes I would eat a whole sleeve of Oreos, which tasted delicious, then I would feel awful for a while. It’s a lot to ask of your body, to process all that food.

Did you see a lot of other solo hikers? Did traveling alone made you more open to meeting random people? Travelling alone does make it easy to meet people. Most hikers start alone, and many hike in groups for various lengths of time. When I started, I wanted to hike alone to challenge myself and rely on my own decisions. I became more open to meeting people over time, and by the end of trail I found a balance between independence and community. Who were the coolest people you met along the way? Everyone I met had an interesting back story—one couple worked in Antarctica, one girl sold her house to live out of a backpack, there were Marines who hiked to deal with PTSD, and people who left their high-paying jobs because they didn’t want to devote their lives to work. One of my favorite characters on trail was a retired guy from New Jersey. He lived years without health insurance or hot water, and took ice-cold hose showers every day at home, even in the winter. He told only one person he was hiking the PCT and always camped alone far off trail. He didn’t own a phone, but carried a small radio to listen to baseball games. Every time he went into town to buy food, he bought a glass, because he only drank beer out of a glass. He was also a scavenger. Once in town I gave him part of a cookie and he just packed it away for later. Another time he told me that he carried a cube of bouillon for an emergency meal. I told him it didn’t have any calories, and he said, “But it sure does fill you up!” I should mention that there are more men than women on trail, and most people I met were white and middle class, so unfortunately trail culture is not too diverse. How many times were you ever truly scared, and why? Most of the time trail felt very safe, but I had a couple moments of being spooked. I almost stepped on a rattlesnake. I once got lost looking for a spring at night without my pack. I got dangerously cold during a snowstorm. These situations were all preventable had I been paying better attention. Some hikers do end up in truly scary situations. One girl had a mountain lion stalk her at night, and another guy ended up lost on a snowy cliff where he couldn’t go forward or backward. Oh my god. A lot of people on trail carry a SPOT device with an emergency button that activates a search and rescue response team. They are expensive and I personally felt safe without one, but a few people did use them on trail.

What about weather conditions? You had to hike at night sometimes because of the heat, right? The PCT covers a diverse range of terrains and temperatures. In the desert, it reaches 110 degrees, and water sources are sometimes 30 miles apart. I carried 1.5 gallons of water at a time. Hiking at night is much cooler and requires less water, so many people hike early and late (resting midday). Night hiking is beautiful but spooky. Some huge bugs and rodents that come out at night. And then there was the extreme cold: I’m reading a blog post where you did sit-ups in the middle of the night to stay warm. What’s your least favorite and most favorite weather to hike in? I still prefer hiking in desert heat over the cold Northwestern weather. In Oregon and Washington, I dealt with rain, hail and snow, which is dangerous without adequate food and gear. Most people carry down jackets and sleeping bags, but down is useless when wet. When it is cold, taking breaks is not an option. I knew one couple who hiked over 24 hours without stopping because all their gear was wet and it was snowing. They would have become hypothermic if they stopped. Can you tell me some hiker code? What’s the jargon like? There are lots of phrases specific to thru hiking. Some are practical (“slackpacking” is hiking a section without a full pack, “hiker hunger” describes the extreme hunger after hiking, “vortex” is when you spend longer than expected in town). A lot of them are meant to be funny (“Vitamin I” for ibuprofen). “Cowboy camping,” sleeping under the stars, is one of my favorite terms. It’s basically a fancy way of saying “I am too lazy to pitch my tent and I doubt it is going to rain tonight.” My friend “Scrub” has a more extensive list of hiking terms on his blog.

That’s his trail name: does everyone have one? Everyone gets a trail name, usually given by another hiker. Part of the idea is that you can leave your other life behind and be someone new on trail. And there’s other stuff like this: trail angels, trail magic, what does that mean? A “trail angel” is anyone who helps you by offering “trail magic.” It could be a day hiker who gives you an apple or someone who drives you to town. There are established trail angels who help hikers each year by leaving food or sodas on trail or even opening their homes to hikers. There are also some trail magic events, where angels make burgers or pancakes on trail for a day or two. It is hard to overstate how incredible it is to come upon fresh hot food or cold sodas after being out in the woods for a few days. The terms seem right. How was your emotional state going into the hike, and during it? What was the default state of each day? I was much happier on trail than I was prior to trail. Some of that may have had to do with the endorphins released from exercise. I also gained a lot of confidence in my body and my ability to troubleshoot difficult situations. By the end of the trail, I felt I could do anything. I certainly had moments of frustration, crankiness, and misery, but I always preferred trail to home.

Wow. What did you do to pass the time? It wasn’t too different from regular life. Sometimes I listened to music or books, sometimes I worried about logistics, sometimes I wondered what to do with my life. I thought about family and friends and remembered things I had forgotten. Sometimes I played games with other hikers, sometimes I counted my steps, sometimes I brushed my teeth for an hour. What are some good stories you heard on the trail from other people? There was a huge snowstorm in Washington that coincided with the government shutdown, and some hikers decided to road walk the last 60 miles to Canada to avoid deep snow. Rangers stopped them because it was illegal to be in the park during the shutdown. So after hiking 2600 miles, they quit because of a triviality. I also heard a story about a girl who saw a mountain lion sitting next to the trail. She roared at it, like you are supposed to (you never want to let a mountain lion know you are scared), then kept walking past it only to realize that there was a switchback in the trail and she had to pass it again. And then, there was a funny story about a hiker I never met who found chapstick on the ground and used it for crotch chafing. A few minutes later a woman walked by and asked if anyone had seen her pina colada chapstick. From that point forward his trail name was “Penis Colada.” That is a great story. What was your favorite part of the trail?

The last four days on trail were my favorite. I snowshoed on fresh snow through the most spectacular scenery on trail with a boy who I like very much. It was new and exciting and beautiful and romantic. What about the least? Southern Oregon was my least favorite part. Everyone talks about how Oregon is flat and easy, but my feet were hurting so it didn’t feel easy. In my opinion, it was also the least spectacular part of trail, just woods and ponds.

What was your favorite pit stop? One of my favorite stops was Buck’s Lake, a small town in northern California. I got off trail to apply for a job. I didn’t end up getting the job, but I stayed with the most incredible trail angels. They were welcoming and made burgers with heirloom tomatoes and peach cobbler and fruit salad. They also took me out on their pontoon for sunset to drink white wine and listen to the Beach Boys.

What did you miss most while you were hiking? Fresh fruits and vegetables, and my friends and family. How did this hike physically affect your body? I lost about 5 to 10 pounds by the end, despite gaining muscle. My breasts mostly disappeared and my feet grew a full size. Women usually lose less weight than men, which is an advantage on trail. What about your hair? My hair was crazy on trail. I was trying to grow it out, but it was a bad length for hiking: long enough to tangle and too short to pull back. I had dyed it before trail and wanted to let the dyed part grow out. I also decided to stop using shampoo, in part thanks to articles like this. Needless to say, my hair was a bleachy, greasy, tangled mess. I cut it off when returned home. Before or after, did you have a lot of people telling you that they wanted to hike the PCT too? Or were people more like, "You’re nuts!” A lot of people say something along the lines of, “Wow, that’s amazing! I could never do that!” But hiking is kind of like drawing. People say they can’t draw, as if it’s a mysterious talent, but both drawing and hiking are just a set of skills anyone could learn. If you are interested in hiking the PCT or another trail, I would encourage you to go ahead and do it. I think it is almost always a positive experience, although returning to regular life is difficult. People sometimes romanticize long-distance hiking, but I was just walking. Some people work 8 or 10 hours a day on spreadsheets or washing floors and few people say that is amazing. What’s your favorite picture from your PCT hike?

This is a campsite on an exposed ridge in northern California. The sky was smoky from a nearby fire, but I could see well enough to watch a meteor shower. It’s hard to choose one photo, but that was a good night.