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moririki · 3 years

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⤷ MORE THAN YOU'D BARGAIN FOR

DENJI X READER -> 1.7K when it comes to a fool blinded by love, it sure hurts to have the short end of the stick

REQUEST -> ✰ CONTAINS -> angst, friends with benefits‼️, happy ending bc i'm weak like that, denji not knowing how to process emotions, very loose college!au cos i'm lazy, makima being slightly antagonised because fuck her, mentions of sex but nothing super explicit i don't think MORI'S THOUGHTS -> thinking about denji's hands. i want to learn how to animate manga panels now so i can do a csm edit. also the writing style got kinda boring im SORRY

HEARTBREAK WAS ALWAYS BOUND TO HAPPEN IN THESE SORT OF RELATIONSHIPS. anyone with a pair of eyes and ears could give a clear answer to the question "who does denji like?" and no matter how much you wanted that answer to change, it would never be you.

even when the blonde boy had been so insistent on his heart belonging to another, he still had urges. so under the influence of one too many bottles of alcohol, it was a fairly easy decision for both of you to fall into bed together. more than once. more than you'd care to admit.

being with denji was nice. he was funny, sweet at times and vulgar during the others, and you found yourself repeating a mantra of don't catch feelings for your friend during your time together. and truth be told, it was hard not to, even when you and denji had finished your business and the topic of conversation always seemed to make its way back to makima.

it left a bitter taste in your mouth when denji acted like nothing had happened between the pair of you in other settings. the bitterness turned sour when you realised that there was no reason for him to have to either, and you cursed yourself when you realised you had done the worst thing possible and gone and fallen for your friend who so clearly wouldn't like you back.

but there were times where you thought that you just might have a chance.

even though your cursed your heart for fluttering and rearing its head each time so willingly at denji's mercy, you couldn't help but take every offhand action of his as a ray of hope. with the way his hands engulfed yours to anchor himself as he thrusted into you, the way his lips left urgent kisses on your lips as you panted beneath him, the way he whispered sweet nothings into your ear as you cried out in ecstasy.

and even when you were lying next to each other in his bed, catching your breath. you would turn to look at his face sometimes, only to see him staring at you already with a look in his eyes that could only be described as wistful. but you were a fool to think that you could ever upseat makima in denji's eyes.

false hope could only get you so far.

with his breath tickling the back of your neck and his large hand rubbing patterns into your hip, this false hope really had gotten you somewhere. but all good things must come to an end. words that you dreaded to say weighed heavy on your tongue, but you dragged yourself along, lifting them just enough to feel them escape your lips before you could really stop them.

"denji, what are we?"

you felt the hand that rested on you go still, and the arm that was poised as a pillow for you went rigid. hell, the boy that was holding you so close to his chest had practically stopped breathing, and you felt your eyelids slide shut in a bitter defeat before you heard another word. it's not like you needed them to understand how he felt, anyway.

"we're friends, aren't we?" his tone was so controlled, so even and level and unlike the denji that you knew and, dare you say it, loved. it sent another shot tubneling straight through your heart, and you were glad that you were currently facing away from him. you wouldn't be able to handle seeing the look on his face as all of your tentative hopes were crushed under his heel. all you wanted to do was curl in on yourself and maybe try to cry away the numbness that was invading your body from the chest outward.

you raised a shaking hand to push denji's own off of you, and you felt the mattress underneath you creak as the boy shifted in confusion at your behaviour.

"y/n?"

your kept your back turned to him as you got out of his bed, pulling on your own clothed and scowling in frustration when you couldn't find your shirt anywhere. you were seconds away from letting the first droplets fall, and you did not want to let denji see.

you snagged some random material of a shirt off of the bedroom floor, yanking it over your head and turning to face denji with a face that you hoped wasn't too scrunched from holding back your tears.

"we're not just friends and you fucking know it."

you didn't have time to register his wounded facial expression or the pleading calls of your name that he cast towards your retreating figure, but you grabbed your shoes before leaving his dorm, shutting the door behind you a little too forcefully and storming off back to your own room.

you must look insane, padding along the halls with no shoes as angry tears streaked down your face and you tried your best not to audibly sob. by the time you had made it back to your room your eyes were streaming, and you flopped on your bed with little regard for anything else other than crying your eyes out.

truth be told, after that fateful night and the best cry of your life you felt much better. you knew where you stood, you had your feelings sorted out, and you knew that a little distance would really help you to finally move on from your friend.

now, if only denji would stop calling and texting you like nothing had happened.

you felt like you could scream when you saw a notification from him, asking if you wanted to study for the test that you had next week. you bit back the petty urge to ask him if he wanted to study with you as just friends, instead opting to turn your phone off and bury your face in your pillow once again.

matters of the heart take time, after all.

on denji's end, things weren't looking much better. he brushed off his confusion at your actions and words when you had left so abruptly the other day, only to find himself staring at his ceiling trying to decipher his feelings and what the hell you had meant.

he likes makima. and he has, for a while now. he could count on one hand the amount of times he had interacted with the girl who sat in front of him in the lecture hall, and every time had been met with this strange giddy feeling in his chest. though it was rare, he knew that feeling.

but the one he felt right now was so, so, different. when the door clicked shut behind you, it felt like a piece of him had up and left along with you. the very reason that he had accelerated things so far in your relationship was because of how right things felt with you. the slightest graze of your fingertips across his chest didn't light any fireworks in his mind, but it's like warmth perforated his skin and was injected straight into him from you.

truth be told, that feeling was the most addicting he had ever felt. and when he heard that air of finality right after the door shut behind you, it didn't take long for denji to realise just how cold everything felt without you.

but he still liked makima, right?

that giddy feeling in his chest he got from her was enough to fill the you-shaped hole, right?

you not talking to him wasn't what made his heart hurt, right?

he only realised just how wrong he had it when he talked to makima for the fourth time ever. she had turned in her seat, even smiling at him and asking for a pen, and all that came to mind was how much he missed your smile.

hell, he missed everything. the sound of your laugh, the smell of your hair. the way you fit against him and said his name. and that's when he realised this you-related feeling was.

longing.

there was a knock on your door. and another. you groaned, rolling over to check the time to see that it was three in the morning.

by the time you had cracked your door open you saw a flash of blond hair and a face all-too-familiar, you knew it was too late to slam your door shut. denji's face perked up, and you already knew that you were done for.

he lifted his hand, revealing a pretty albeit crumpled bouquet of flowers. you almost giggled to yourself, guessing that the mastermind of that romantic gesture was most likely denji's roommate aki. but it was appreciated, nonetheless.

"what do you want, denji?" you were painfully aware of just how much of a mess you looked right now- eyes still red around the rim from how many self-pitying tears you had shed over this entire situation.

denji's mouth and opened and closed, and you sighed against your barely open door which still had a chain on it.

"i'm not in the mood, denji."

"no, no, it's just that i wanted to say that i've finally figured out what we are." it appears tgat your friend finally found his voice. you looked him in the eye again, trying not to let the hope in your heart build itself too high. "we're way more than friends, y/n."

you felt any resistance crumble at those words, and the sheepish smile on your face grew.

"so, can i come in?" you smiled at denji, shutting your door to undo the latch before opening it again, wide enough to let him back in to your life. consider him a weakness of yours.

the first thing denji did when he crossed the threshold of your door was wrap his arms around you, dried tears and crumpled flowers and all, and bury his face in your hair. the only words he had to offer was a mumbled i miss you into your skin, and you felt your body melt against him like it had so many times before.

when you finally broke apart, you couldn't help but wonder.

"so, what are the flowers for denji?" the boy before you blushed, his eyes flitting off to the side. he raised a hand to the back of his neck, taking a breath to summon some courage.

"i was hoping... that i could take you out on a date. or be your boyfriend. something like that."

"what?" denji was still bright red, though his eyes were locked onto yours.

"you heard me." you smiled once again, taking a step forwards and effectively closing the distance between you two.

"i would love to."

take a look at the menu - ,, ⚖️ ·˚ ༘ ꒱

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tomurasprincess · 3 years

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Here’s a denki idea with incest and streamer denki for that anon that was asking about denki earlier and they get more fucked up as they go :)

(Tw incest Tw dub con... kinda? Tw non con) don’t worry Denki anon I got you, but hear me out. Denki is a live streamer that only shows his face once and a while, one day he “convinces” (basically passive aggressively threats and gaslights sister reader that they need to have sex with him to prove that “they aren’t a slut and they are still pure”, after sister reader refuses again. Denki forcefully bends them over the desk and tells them to cum around his cock or he will turn on the stream with the camera on so everyone can see how big of a slut his sister is.

(Ending one: consent is kinda given but it’s after he already pushes in so imma say dubcon) He’s surprised to find his sister trying to get him to speed up before she rubs against him and smirks at him with a small grind on his cock and a “get on with it then”

(Ending two: no consent, non consensual recording) Denki forces sister reader down onto the desk before slowly pushing in and out, wanting them to feel the drag from his cock before commanding them to say “I only want nii -san’s cock! I’m only a slut for nii-San!” After he fucks them for a while, talking about how much better their pussy and moans are rather than his hand and porn, he finishes. He cleans up sister reader before laying them to sleep, secretly saving the video he took of him fucking them for himself and blackmail

(Ending three: no consent, non consensual recording, non consensual somno, he broadcasts this bitch) pretty much the same as number two but turns out he has a seperate streaming account all for videotaping sister reader asleep as he eats them out or fucks them on his fingers all recorded and broadcasted. He turns on the camera with his face hidden but his sisters not, and fucks his sister as people flood in to watch as she takes his dick. Every time she tries to fight back or get him to stop he shocks her leg and goes harder to prove that she’s his and every time he shocks her he says something like “you must be enjoying it with how much you’re clenching down on me” . He ends the stream after finishing and finds his sister passed out, but not without smirking to himself and saying “tune in to the stream tomorrow and we’ll see if this slut can take dick in her tight little ass as good as she can take it in her pussy.”

Sorry for rambling but I just needed to share this or I was gonna go crazy

Warnings: Noncon, incest, forced orgasms, non consensual filming, degradation, electric shocks, mentions of somno, yandere Notes: Dark!Denki is my favorite kind of Denki, so I went with option number 3.

"I've got a surprise for you, sis," your brother says happily, grinning at you with that goofy smile like he used to. He had been changing so much lately, and not for the better. Much colder, much less likely to take on hero jobs. To your shock, he even said once that heroes were worthless, that the villains would end up winning. It wasn't like his usual self, and you're happy to see him acting closer to how he used to.

"What kind of surprise?" "Come into my room and I'll show you." He walks away, leaving you to trail behind him like you've always done since you were kids. You always looked up to your brother, always wanted to be close to him. And he was the same way. Everyone thought you were too close for siblings, but you disagreed. You wouldn't want it any other way.

Finally, he leads you into his room where there's a camera set up on a tripod and pillows and blankets arranged on the floor in front. You give him a surprised look, feeling uneasy for the first time. "Come on, this will be so much fun." He chuckles at you, pushing you roughly towards the center of the room. You're forced to the floor, face down and ass up in the air before you know it. "What the hell is this about, Denki-nii???" You snap at him, trying to get up again but finding your arm twisted behind your back painfully. "That hurts!" "I know you guys were tired of watching my toy with my sister while she's drugged up and asleep!" He chirps out, grinding himself against your backside. "So I thought we'd have a super special stream today!"

"While I'm asleep? I don't - I don't understand," you whisper, sounding far more childish than you intended. You think briefly to the times you woke up and your pussy was soaked, feeling sore and stretched out. You dismissed it as nothing despite the nagging doubt in the back of your mind. Sometimes you thought you remembered a presence hovering over you - but surely it was just a dream - "You really are a naive little bitch," your brother mocks you. "Can't believe you never realized what your dear older brother was doing to you." He leans in closer to whisper in your ear. "Or maybe you did know and you liked it - " "Please stop," you whimper at him, "I don't want this, please - " You hear the ripping of clothes as your skirt is torn away, revealing a lack of underwear. "My sister doesn't even wear panties? What a little slut. I think you do want this." You feel something hot and hard prodding at your clit, and you let out another whimper as you try to squirm away. But an electric current runs through your body, and your muscles tighten up as you gasp. "Stay still, sis," Denki laughs at you. "You don't want me to keep doing that, do you?" You begin to weep, not understanding what caused your brother to change so much. Why he's being so cruel to you. But you don't have long to wonder before he's pushing inside of you, stretching your muscles out and taking your virginity cruelly. You only cry harder at the pain. "Fuck, my little sister's cunt is so fucking tight. Were you a virgin, sis?" You say nothing, shaking and shivering as his hips snap forward to bury himself entirely into his little sister's tight cunt. "Answer me," he growls, and an electric shock runs through your body. You scream this time, clenching around his cock involuntarily. "Yes! Yes I was!" You manage to choke out through the convulsions, and he stops his quirk.

His hips begin to move, balls smacking against your clit with every thrust. It causes unwanted pleasure to build up in you, muscles of your lower stomach tightening. "Please - Denki-nii, please stop -"

"Fuck," he groans out, "keep calling me that, it turns me on."

Your words fail you, and you keep your mouth shut until another electric current runs through your body. This one is so strong that you can barely breathe through it, the pain extreme. You want to refuse, want to do anything but what he wants, but you also want the pain to stop.

"Denki-nii, Denki-nii!" And still, despite the pain, you feel yourself begin to cum around your brother's cock. "Little slut," he giggles a bit, "cumming around your brother's cock like that. You've wanted your Denki-nii for a while, haven't you?" "Yes!" You scream, feeling a sense of relief as he deactivates his quirk. "Yes I want my Denki-nii's cock!" Tears stream openly from your face as he tangles a hand in your hair, forcing your back to arch and stare into the camera. "My little sis here is squeezing my cock so damned well. Her cunt feels fucking amazing." You let out a choked sob as you cum again, almost painful in its intensity as your cunt pulses around your brother's cock. He finds his own end inside of you, pace stuttering as he fills his baby sister full of hot cum. You can't keep your eyes awake anymore. They flutter closed and stay closed as you finally lose consciousness. "Oops," he chuckles, "I may have been a bit too rough. Ah well, hope you like the show. Stay tuned while I wait for her to wake up so I can fuck this tight little asshole!"

#mari thirsts #denki thirst #tw: noncon #tw:incest #tw: somno #anon asks

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ifmywishescametrue · 3 years

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"You didn't deserve that... You deserve so much better." for buckytony pls 🤓

thank you for sending one! it got kind of out of hand lol so here's 2.2k of breaking up and making up. hope you like it!

Tony loses track of what the fight is about fairly quickly. He knows it started with what seemed like playful bickering, the kind their relationship was practically built on, but somewhere along the way the jabs turned much more pointed. Barbed wire wrapped around them, until each one was like a knife wound.

The first real cut came from him, he knows. Bucky's witty comment hit a little too close to one of his hundred insecurities, and reflex made him return it with too much sharpness. He can't blame Bucky for reacting, but they're both to blame for letting it get this out of hand. That’s not something that matters in the moment, though.

In the moment, all that matters is the careless insults and merciless words they lob back and forth. They chip away at each other and their relationship until it’s crumbling around them, but even that doesn’t matter. It becomes secondary to getting in the last word and one-upmanship, like it’s a competition for who can hurt who the most that they both desperately want to win, consequences be damned.

“You know this is why people keep leaving you,” Bucky says. “At some point it should be pretty damn obvious that it's you, not them.”

Tony laughs bitterly because the only other choice is crying. “Cause you're a real fucking prize, right? Bet people are just lining up to date a guy they're barely allowed to touch. And God forbid you ever try to do something nice for him, because it'll never actually be right.”

“Better than a guy with daddy issues so severe it'll take him two years to even tell you he loves you. Don't bother saying it in the meantime to him either, because he'll run off to hide for a week after each time.”

“Well, you know what, I'll make it easy for you, then,” Tony says, backing away to grab his jacket. “You don't have to worry about me and all my issues anymore.”

He forcefully shoves his arms into the sleeves and grabs his keys from the hook by the door. Bucky watches with a clenched jaw and doesn't try to stop him, not even when he pauses to give him the chance.

“What are you waiting for? Go ahead and run off. Prove my point.”

Tony shakes his head, an ache already forming in his chest that he ignores. “I’m not proving your point, because this isn’t running. This is breaking up with you because you’re a fucking asshole.”

He lets the door slam shut behind him and speedwalks down the hall, repeatedly pushing the elevator button. It doesn’t come quickly enough, and he flings open the door to the stairwell to rush down them. His vision blurs dangerously, and he can hardly see where he’s going, but he doesn’t slow down. The tears come freely with no around to see, until he’s out on the sidewalk and violently swipes them away with the back of his hand. He doesn’t pay attention to where he’s walking, only on getting as far away as possible.

Where he ends up shouldn’t come as a surprise to him. It’s muscle memory to come here at this point, a walk so familiar he could do it in his sleep and still manage to avoid all the cracks and uneven parts on the sidewalk on the way.

He stands outside of Shield’s Bar, neon lights coloring his face blue and pink, and he contemplates going in. It’s a Thursday, which means Clint is working the bar until midnight. Natasha will be waiting tables, and Steve will come in to replace her at ten.

All Bucky’s friends. He won’t get any of them in the breakup.

Steve will be the first to turn his back on him with his unwavering loyalty to his best friend. Clint will follow next because he hates tension and it’s the easier side to take. Natasha will be last, and she’ll claim that she loves them both and choosing sides is childish and ridiculous. But she’ll go, too, eventually. When none of her other friends will be in the same room as him, and all of their usual hangout spots become off limits. It’ll grow awkward and uncomfortable until promises to meet up turn into vague excuses and texts spaced months apart.

But where does he have to go if it isn’t here?

Rhodey’s on base in California, and Pepper moved back to New York the second her business degree was done. Staying in Boston was never the plan, not until Bucky and his found family welcomed him into their lives and made it feel like home. Where is there to go if home isn’t an option anymore?

He stands there long enough that people start to whisper as they pass by. They must think he’s lost his mind, staring blankly at a brick wall and hardly blinking, but he doesn’t hear what they say. Doesn’t hear anything but his own thoughts running in circles, going from anger to regret to shame and back again.

He wonders if Bucky’s right. If he truly is the reason it never works out. He knows he’s too insecure and emotionally unavailable. He demands too much and gives too little in return and doesn’t know how to communicate.

He used to watch his parents fight, orbiting around each other with avoidance and unspoken words until the dams broke and silence turned to screams, and he would swear that he would be better. If he was lucky enough to be in love with someone and have them love him in return, he would understand just how rare and beautiful that is and never take it for granted.

Easier said than done. Harder to face the fact that sometimes his words sound exactly like his father’s once did and sometimes he feels like his mother when he quietly lets himself be walked on and overlooked. The worst of both of them is tangled up inside of him, and it always kills whatever he touches.

Natasha finds him there eventually. She opens the door roughly, with intention that falters momentarily before she asks, “Do you plan on coming in at some point or are you staying out here all night?”

“I should probably go,” he says, quietly enough that it’s nearly lost to the wind.

Natasha watches him for a long moment, then steps out of the doorway to take his hand. She leads him over to an empty booth and slides into the opposite side.

“Aren’t you supposed to be working?”

She shrugs, “Steve will be here in a few minutes. No one’s going to die if they have to wait for their beer.”

Silence stretches on, and he stares down at his hands on the table. It’s warmer inside the bar, and he doesn’t realize that the cold has turned his fingers numb until they begin to unthaw.

“People coming in here were talking about some guy loitering outside. Some were saying he looked sad, some said lost. A few less optimistic people voted for strung out on drugs, but I think it’s safe to rule that one out now. Same with lost, seeing as you’ve been here a thousand times. That leaves sad, which means you had a fight with Bucky, and you didn’t come in, which means you think it’s your fault. Am I right so far?”

Tony nods, hanging his head low, and she continues to ask, “Do you want to talk about it or drink about it?”

“We broke up,” Tony mumbles. “I did it.”

She takes a long breath, and her hand is warm when it slips back into his. “Are you planning on fixing it?”

“Not sure it’s fixable. I said some things, he said some things. Can’t really take any of it back now.”

“People say things they don’t mean all the time. Doesn’t make it unforgivable.”

He shrugs like his heart isn’t broken. “Maybe it’s better off this way.”

Natasha sighs, “Tony.”

“What?”

“Go home.”

“Pretty sure I don’t have one of those anymore.”

“Of course you do,” she says softly. “I promise you that he wants you to come back.”

Tony shakes his head. “You weren’t there, Nat. You don’t know what happened.”

“I don’t have to know what happened to know that he wants you to come home. If he feels even half as terrible as you look, he wants you. Just because you broke up doesn’t mean it’s over. It’s only over if you don’t go back.”

Tony bites his lip to keep it from quivering, and he asks, “What if you’re wrong? What if he doesn’t want to see me?”

“Well, it can’t exactly make things worse, can it?”

He huffs a humorless laugh, “I guess not.”

Natasha slides out of the booth, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Go home before he comes out looking for you, and text me in the morning to tell me I was right.”

She walks away, greeting Steve as he comes in, and Tony lingers there for another minute before getting up. He waves to them both on his way out and tries not to think about what she’ll tell Steve about his reason for being there.

The walk back to his and Bucky’s apartment seems quicker than the walk away from it, and Tony resents it for not giving him more time.

He takes the stairs again and hesitates outside the door, what ifs overwhelming his mind. What if he walks in and all of his things are packed up for him? What if Bucky isn’t even there or all of his belongings are gone instead? What if he can’t fix it and this is where it really ends? He doesn’t know if he could recover from that.

Turning the key in the lock, he opens the door slowly and holds his breath in trepidation.

Nothing looks different. No packed boxes, no smashed picture frames, no sign that anything ever went wrong.

Bucky is on the couch, curled into the corner with his legs held tight to his chest, and he doesn’t seem to notice that he isn’t alone anymore. It’s painfully quiet, and the single light that was on before isn’t enough now that it's grown darker outside, but he hasn’t turned any others on.

“I’m sorry,” Tony says into the silence. It’s as good a place as any to start. “You didn't deserve that. Any of it. The whole stupid thing. You deserve so much better. I should be better at this, but I’ve done a real shit job of it lately, I think. Maybe not even lately. Maybe I’ve been a terrible boyfriend the whole time, and in that case you should probably tell me to go and not come back, but I’d like to think there were at least moments where I was sort of okay, and I’d like to try to be more than just okay if you’ll let me.”

Bucky stares at him, lips parted and red-rimmed eyes unblinking. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Tony freezes, unsure of how to answer that, and Bucky unfolds himself to walk over and stand in front of him.

“You broke up with me,” Bucky says.

“Yes, but I -”

“No,” he interrupts. “You broke up with me.”

Tony frowns in confusion and slowly says again, “Yes.”

“That means I do the grovelling here, because I fucked it up. I beg for the second chance, because I crossed the line so far that you left. And I did it on purpose, too, because I had a shit day so I pushed until you pushed back,” Bucky explains. “And apparently I did such a good job being horrible to you that you think it’s your fault.”

Tony tries to process that, but it’s taking some time to work through. A complete turn around on his thoughts that almost makes him dizzy.

“Why did you have a shit day? What happened?”

“Is that really what you’re focusing on in all of that?” Bucky shakes his head in disbelief and runs a hand through his hair. “God, it’s you that deserves better. That’s what I’m telling you here. You were right to leave, and I should be the one telling you I’m sorry.”

“You had a bad day and took it out on me. How many times have I done the same to you? You never once left.”

“Doesn’t make it right.”

“No,” Tony agrees. He reaches for one of Bucky’s hands, because he needs the contact and has a feeling that Bucky does too. “But it doesn’t mean it’s not worth working on. I meant what I said about wanting to be better for you.”

Bucky nods, looking down at their joined hands. “I want to be better for you, too. How do we do that?”

“A lot of talking about our feelings, probably.”

Bucky pulls a face. “God, that sounds terrible.”

Tony laughs, taking his other hand to pull him in closer, “Yeah, it does, but we’ll get better at it eventually.”

“Can we start tomorrow?” Bucky asks. He leans down to rest his forehead against Tony’s. “I’d really like to just hold you tonight.”

“Yeah, baby,” Tony murmurs. “Hold me tonight. It’ll be better in the morning.”

#buckytony #winteriron #my fic #my writing #prompts #prompt fill #warmachinesocks

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wolvesandpetals · 3 years

Text

Loki x Sylvie Post-Finale Fanfiction (Angst, Rated Teen) Part 1 of 2

SPOILER ALERT.

It's probably just the alcohol, but the beats of the music are starting to sound a little bit like a marching drum that's announcing war. She can feel herself dancing along to it, but her whole body is on alert, ready to switch to fight and flight any second.

"So, cool place huh?" The bloke in the leather jacket asks.

She tries to remember his name. Jeff something. Or maybe Jed. No, not Jed, she's thinking of Star Wars again. That's what happens when you binge watch a multiverse of movies in a single day.

Oh, yeah, that's right. She broke the multiverse.

Another shot of tequila, and she takes not-Jed's hand in hers. It doesn't feel right, at least not the way-

No.

She realises he asked her a question, but she can't remember what, and she just laughs, because that always works.

Encouraged, he leans in close and whispers into her ears. "How about we get out of here?"

"And go where, exactly?" She asks, but she's not sure he understands, not with how slurred the words come out.

She laughs again, and this time, it's bitter. This time, she's laughing at how this is so him, this getting drunk in the face of imminent danger and making a mess of things.

(But I'm not you.)

---

She's frozen in her place the second the glowing yellow door appears. But it's not for her, at least not this time.

She hasn't been on the run for a while. Doesn't need to be. Because even though she is the one who unleashed the chaos, it's the chaos that needs to be contained immediately. She's low on the list of priorities.

The TVA will come for her. But not right now.

---

It's extremely easy pretending to be a psychic. All she has to do is take her client's hands and enchant him, find a memory, describe it back to him.

Sometimes she does it just for fun, just to see the look of amazement on their faces.

Other times, she does it for the money she needs to survive.

"And I see a blonde woman. Very beautiful."

"That's my wife."

The way he smiles, loving and proud, makes her heart drop.

"What do you see in her future? Is she happy? Does she get the job at the magazine?"

There is definitely at least one timeline where she does get the job, but The Enchantress cannot exactly tell if it's this one. She can't actually see the future, after all.

She sees the colors drain from his face as her silence swallows the room. "She's going to be okay, right? I just want her to be okay."

(I just want you to be okay.)

There's that bitter laugh again, because-

No. She can't do this right now.

"She loves you very much", she whispers, to the man in front of her, and to the man who is not there to hear those words.

---

Mobius finds her in the middle of a concert by a Nirvana where Kurt Cobain never died. She can easily slip away, disappear into the screaming, writhing crowd if she wants.

Or she can just take him some place quiet and hear him out.

"Help us", Mobius pleads. He sounds exhausted, and not just physically. "We're outnumbered and outwitted. Our world is in danger."

"This isn't my world", she reminds him.

"Yet, you're here", he retorts.

Her smile is pained. "Where else will I go?"

He is sympathetic, like he always has been. And he offers her a new glorious purpose. "Come with me. We need you. He needs you."

She feels the air find its way out of her lungs the same way she pushed him out of her life- painfully, forcefully. "H-how is he?"

"He's okay... all things considered."

Now there's a cocktail of relief and disappointment that will give her months of sleepless nights.

"Tell him I'm-" she starts, but she doesn't know how to finish that sentence. What can she tell him? That she's sorry for not trusting him when she should have? That she's sorry for making the universes collide?

That she's sorry for betraying him and breaking his heart?

(How will I know you won't betray me at the end?)

"Nevermind."

---

It's been really hard facing the consequences of her actions, watching the timelines bleed into each other and destroy people's lives- families torn, achievements gone, every little anomaly delving into death and destruction. Every headline on the newspaper is her fault, and she has to live with that.

But that seems so easy compared to this moment where she has to face him.

The plan was to send him away, kill He Who Remains, give people their free will back, save the world, then come back to him. Yeah, he'd be mad at her at first, sure, but he'd forgive her eventually, she was confident.

Then the timelines started to branch the minute she stuck the dagger in that terrifying man's chest, and she knew she had screwed up.

She had sunk to the ground in defeat as the realisation of the repercussions hit her, and she did what she has always done- run.

She didn't even realise she had sent him to the wrong universe until she teleported herself into another universe as well. The journey back was long and lonely, but she dreamt of him in colors while the world was bleeding red, and that was enough to keep her going.

She doesn't really know what she'll do when she sees him again. Neither does she know what reaction she expects from him. Nothing he can say to her can be worse than what she thinks of herself.

A part of her hopes he would be overwhelmingly happy, he would come running to her, just like he did at The Void, greet her with the smile that has won a hundred hearts- including hers, and tell her everything will be alright. Another part of her fears that he would be furious, and he would confront her with accusations of unleashing havoc on all worlds- especially his.

What she never expected is this eerie calm that makes her feel like she is standing in the storm center.

His walls are up.

And it causes her to redirect the anger she feels at herself towards him. There's venom in her voice. "So you do get to rule, after all."

"I don't feel much like a king." He shrugs. "I'm more of a multiversal janitor. Mopping up multiversal messes."

"My messes."

"Our messes." He corrects, his features softening around the edges. "We made a mistake." He has been saying that ever since he found himself in the alternate TVA, and that hasn't changed even after getting back to his own version of the bureau. Always "we", never "she". He simply cannot bring himself to blame her without taking accountability for his part in the mess.

"Don't patronize me." Her hands are shaking, just like her voice, a sharp contrast to his steady silhouette, and can he just hold her, please? "I don't need you to take the fall for me."

His eyes go cold, like they were forged in the heart of Jotunheim. "Of course not", he says, fully composed. "You don't need me for anything. It's not like we're in this together."

(Maybe we can figure it out-together.)

---

She now knows her walls don't- can't- keep the hurt out- it just keeps her locked inside this cage of distrust and insecurities. And the price she has to pay for it is too high.

They could have been lying on a beach somewhere, sipping mimosas right now. Instead, they're here, in the vast, silent library of the TVA, sitting on separate tables, reading files on variants.

The only thing worse than bearing the weight of his gaze is having him stare at his files without looking in her direction even once. She can't take it anymore.

"I'm sorry." She suddenly blurts out.

He looks up, confused. "I'm sorry?"

"I'm sorry for what I did." She repeats. It's difficult to start an apology, but once she finds the strength to begin, the rest of it flows automatically. "I'm sorry I messed up everything. I'm sorry I broke the timelines. I'm sorry the world is in danger." She takes in a deep breath. "And I'm sorry I betrayed you."

His smile is the saddest kind. "A Loki betraying a Loki. That's the least surprising thing in the world. What's shocking is how I didn't see it coming. You really had me going with that kiss. Very nice distraction. Very Loki."

Free will comes with the fine-print of living with the consequences of your choices. And she has to live with hers every day. The tears finally spill out of her eyes. She hasn't let herself cry for a long, long time. But now she's breaking down worse than the multiverse. "I didn't do it to distract you. I did it to say goodbye."

He gets up, and she panics that he's leaving. Instead, he sits down in front of her, reaches for her hand, but changes his mind mid-way and lets them fall to his side. "You didn't have to say goodbye."

"It's all I've ever known." She feels like that scared little girl, far from home, running from minute men, with nobody to turn to but herself. "I told you, I don't have anyone."

"You had me."

That's the saddest part of it all, isn't it? Everything else in her life is the TVA's fault. She's torn from Asgard? Hasn't seen her parents in years? Can't remember her brother Thor? Spent her whole childhood running and hiding? All TVA.

But this? This is all her own doing. This is the one time she had something real, something worth holding onto, someone worth fighting against the world for. Instead, she questioned his intentions, didn't hold on, fought him and ruined everything.

"I didn't want to rule, Sylvie", he finally tells her. "I wanted you."

She has dreamed of this moment when he tells her how he feels. They have come so close to it so many times, the words dangling off the edge of his tongue but never quite finding their way out. She has always known- every word, every action pointed to it. But it was so hard to imagine someone could love her.

It's so hard to imagine someone can love her again. The past tense in his wording terrifies her worse than any danger ever could. "Is it too late to fix things?"

His smile doesn't reach his eyes. "We are fixing things. That's why we are here. Saving the universe."

"You know what I mean."

"I don't know how to trust you again, Sylvie." He tells her point blank- no deception, no lies, no Loki-ism. "And you never trusted me to begin with."

That's not entirely true. She trusts him more than she has trusted anyone. "I really thought I was doing the right thing."

"I know."

(Not to be dramatic, but yeah, we're saving the universe.)

---

The Avengers are much nicer than Loki described them, considering they don't kill her for what she has done, instead tell her about their own journeys towards redemption. Wanda tells her about the man she has loved and lost, and the pain she has caused to an entire town. Barnes talks about his past as a brainwashed assassin. Clint tells her the story of Natasha and how she took charge and changed her life.

Thor is the kindest of them all. He talks about how far Loki himself has come. He tells her stories of his version of Asgard, the nine realms, the glorious battles, the beauty of earth.

She still dreams of death, but sometimes she doesn't.

Sometimes, she hopes.

---

(To be continued)

#loki x sylvie #fanfiction #sylvie x loki #loki fanfic #loki #sylvie laufeydottir #sylki fanfic #sylki

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yourwildsimp · 3 years

Text

Journal

This did not at all go where I thought it would, but it’s here. This is my first X Reader I’ve done so if you have some input, it would be greatly appreciated-

includes: Levi, Y/N

warnings: Mentions of dark thoughts

length: 2,535 words

"Cadet!"

You were quick to glance over your shoulder, wondering how you've messed up this time. You were just about to leave the mess hall, so you were probably going to be scolded for being the last one out, or for not eating again. Levi always snapped about how he needs you at your best.

"You forgot this," the captain said, his stoney blue eyes narrowing as yours widened, "Or did you leave it on purpose?"

It was your journal, the one you were always buried in whenever you could be. You did leave it on purpose, hoping someone would find it and save you from yourself. Hoping that someone would notice all of the changes in your behavior, hoping someone would hear your silent screams. Yet, seeing that it was Levi fucking Ackerman who returned the journal? You wished you had kept suffering alone.

"And it has so many…" Levi hesitated, almost like he was trying to find the right words to string together. "So many horrific thoughts written inside of it."

You could practically feel how serious he was while he gripped your prized possession just a bit tighter. You couldn't handle the growing silence, so you broke it.

"I should know. It's mine, after all." He didn't find your joke very funny.

Levi opened his mouth, picking his next words carefully, "What's going on with you? You haven't been yourself recently."

You mentally swore, fingers twitching at your side. Levi didn't fail to notice, making his abnormal concern grow.

"What do you mean, Captain? I'm perfectly fine." As much as you wished the forced chuckle in your voice would change his way of thinking, it didn't.

"I'm more than certain something is happening with you," his voice grew more pointed as he stared at you, "There's no point in trying to hide it. Just spit it out."

"Why would you even bother asking?" Your muttered question left your lips before you could stop it.

"I want to know because I care about you. That's something a lot of people can't say, so don't go off wasting my support," Levi's tone didn't change and you sucked in a much needed breath.

You wearily watched him place the journal on one of the long tables in the room, the soft thud reminding you of how many hours have gone into fruitless attempts of venting out your pain.

"Stop being stubborn and tell me what's going on, cadet." He inched closer, and you stepped back in response, eyes darting to the table.

"Once again, Jean and Eren left their spots disgusting. Do you want me to clean up, or would you rather chew them out yourself?" You gave a tight smile, forcing yourself to look back at him.

"Don't change the subject," he growled, a strange blaze flaring up in his eyes. Levi noticed how you tensed and he sighed to calm himself. "The things that you wrote in that book," he started, never once looking away from you, "Those were some seriously dark thoughts, and if you honestly do feel that way, you need to talk about it. So, stop trying to be the coldhearted badass and let me know what's running through your mind."

He sounded like a parent trying to convince a child to admit they broke something. It was a bit frightening in all honesty.

You didn't say anything, teeth digging painfully into your tongue so you would keep quiet. You had just now noticed you'd been staring at the wooden floorboards this whole time, and yet you didn't stop.

Levi noticed that you weren't going to contribute, so he did it himself.

"What are you afraid of? Do you think I'm going to be mad at you?"

You could've kicked yourself when your panicked chuckle wormed its way into the one-sided conversation.

"Look at me," he demanded. You didn't listen, a thick gulp being your only reaction. "Cadet, look at me." This time it came out as a snarl, and you obeyed out of pure fear.

Levi shut his eyes for just a moment, a heavy sigh leaving him as he tried to compose himself again. You both knew that he wasn't great with feelings, but he was trying.

"I'm not mad at you. You can tell me whatever you're going through and I'll listen. Don't ever be afraid to let someone know how you feel, that is the only way someone can understand you." You had to clench your jaw to keep a snarky remark from making the situation worse. "Stop hiding from people, stop holding on to these emotions, and thinking that by some miracle things are going to work out by keeping silent. Things don't ever work out that way, and it only prolongs the pain. It only gives time for shit to get worse. So, stop being an idiot and just tell me what's going on already."

"You sound like you're speaking from experience," you muttered after letting his words sink in.

You didn't get a response, so you let your gaze lower, but not drop completely. Levi waited for you. The Levi Ackerman patiently waited for you to let go of some agony. So you did.

"Sometimes," it was difficult for you to refill your lungs with fresh air, "I get these recurring dreams that make me think about the things I'd kill to forget." A fly could be heard over your quiet voice, but you had spoken, and Levi found it a big step forward.

"I see," he spoke more to himself than anything. "So that's why…"

His words trailed off as he remembered walking past the cadet sleeping quarters in the ungodly hours of the morning and often hearing whimpers of fear and sleepy pleads for directions on what to do. His eyebrows furrowed slightly.

"You've been having those, too, haven't you?" He paused, knowing damn well that the night terrors weren't anything but a small piece to the puzzle. But it was progress. "It's not uncommon. Everyone gets those nightmares."

You resisted the urge to insist that's the reason why your problems weren't such a big deal.

"Having thoughts about the people that you've lost, the people that you'd cared about," Levi tightened his jaw, taking a deep breath through his nose and not saying anything for a heartbeat. He changed his wording, "You're allowed to feel. You're allowed to grieve and to be angry, to be hurt." It was like he was reading from the list of your emotional insecurities.

It was starting to get painfully tense, so you attempted to redirect the topic of choice.

"That's funny, considering who's speaking. You only seem slightly agitated whenever you hear about the trouble Eren is constantly causing. I'm surprised you don't have grey's, old man," you laughed in spite of yourself, the noise tense and borderline frantic.

"Writing these thoughts in this book," of course he wouldn't budge. The man's like a stone wall, despite his height. "It's probably your way of coping with what’s happened to you."

You swallowed, glancing away before sucking on your tongue to distract yourself.

"But, you have to be able to talk to someone as well, to be able to hear your problems leave you." Levi didn't say anything after that, quietly observing how you tilted your head up to stop your brimming tears from falling.

He surprised you by taking a seat on the table's bench, a good four or five feet from your journal. "Come here," he said gently, patting his legs, "You look like you need to be held. If you feel comfortable, that is."

"On your lap?" You asked, chest tightening. You knew all it was going to take was one hug- just one god damned hug- and you'd crumble.

"Yes, on my lap. Come on," Levi couldn't care less about your height or weight, none of it bothering him in the slightest.

You hesitated, the exit door seeming all too tempting. You didn't leave, though, and it wasn't because Levi would catch you if you were to run, nor that he would only confront you more forcefully in the future. You knew you needed this- that's the whole reason you had left your secrets behind. But, fuck, it was so hard to make yourself sit on his lap.

"There we go." His encouragement nearly ripped you to shreds.

"What are you? Santa Claus?" You mused, eyes burning holes into your lap with how determined you were to look anywhere but.

"Go on, let it out," Levi pushed you to speak again, this time far more effective.

"Let what out exactly? My Christmas list?" Your voice cracked, heart painfully throbbing.

"Come on, cadet," Levi breathed again, sickeningly gentle eyes looking at you.

"I wish for a cup of hot chocolate with cookies on the side," you forced a twisted smile on your face as burning hot tears started to slip down your cheek. "Maybe at least one good night's rest. O-Or a chance to go back in time."

You were breaking down, caving in on yourself as you choked on a sob.

"I've got you."

But you weren't alone. The captain was rubbing comforting shapes into your back.

You shook violently, tremors growing worse before you gave in completely. Harsh sobs thrashed your body as you buried your face into Levi's chest, letting every bit of your pain out.

"It's alright," Levi's voice warded off the ringing in your ears. "It's going to be okay. Do you hear me? You're going to be okay."

Promises of betterment and words of comfort soothed you as you soaked his uniform with tears. Tears that you've held in for far too long, tears that represented your suffering.

"You did all you could. Stop blaming yourself for whatever happened or you'll never be able to move forward. If all you keep doing is holding onto the past, you'll stay stuck in this shitty, painful cycle," Levi told you exactly what you needed to hear as he alternated between pats and rubs on your back.

He took a deep breath, and you heard his heart rate kick up as your crying quieted, though you didn't- couldn't- stop.

"I had two friends who died on the same damn day. People I considered my family- gone, just like that. People I'd just met, people I had just been acquainted with that morning, died later that day, too," he shared his pain, opening castrated wounds all for you. "Sons, daughters, sisters, brothers, fathers, mothers," he listed, voice wavering before he righted himself, holding you closer. "Dead. Gone. And who was in charge? I was." You felt his chest steeply rise and fall as you sniffled.

"There are things that you'll have to live with, situations you'll be placed in that you'll have to get through." His thumb and index finger captured your chin, forcing you to look at him. "I just want you to remember that you don't have to find a way on your own. You don't have to feel like you need to take all the burden, all the pain, by yourself."

The hand that was on your back navigated to the Scouts emblem on your jacket, gently thumbing at it.

"That's why you have us," there was a smile dancing in his voice, though it never quite reached his face. "We can support each other."

Your tears had calmed down to a few rogue leftovers, and you found yourself ready to slip off of his lap. Levi didn't seem to mind the massive wet stain that bled through his white button-up and onto his peck. Didn't seem to on the outside, but you knew he was a cleaning fanatic.

"My office, my doors, are always open," his tone turned sarcastically bitter, "Unless I have paperwork to fill in, or I'm cleaning up Jaeger's damn mess." He relished the small giggle that left your lips. "If neither of the two are happening, you can always come to me."

He narrowed his eyes at you, lightly flicking your forehead.

"You hear me? Always, cadet." He gently smiled at you. "Not only are my doors open, but my arms are open, too."

You glanced away to hide the sparkle in your eyes. Your attention returned to the captain, however, when a warm hand found itself on your shoulder.

"I know that feeling of thinking everything is your fault," he swallowed, casting his gaze down before looking back at you. "That feeling of being disappointed in yourself, down in the gutter, beating yourself up and wishing that it was you instead." There was a solemn look in his eyes before he spoke again, "I know that feeling, and I know how it eats you alive."

Levi pulled you in for another hug, resting his chin on your shoulder as he shuddered in another breath.

"I also know the feeling of being comforted. Of being reminded that there is a tomorrow, and that things can get better." He gave you a small squeeze before pulling away, both hands on your shoulders now. "That if you make it past today, you can make it past tomorrow, too."

He allowed you to sit back, and the words he spoke were more than welcomed.

"After everything that you've been through, there is no storm that comes your way that you're not strong enough to face," the proud gleam in his eyes spoke volumes. "And, if you feel like you can't handle it alone, you can face it with me by your side. I'll always be here to brace the storm with you."

Nothing could prepare you for what he said next.

"That is a promise, cadet."

Levi never made promises- not like this. The only thing he's ever promised was to dropkick Eren if he ever went so long without showering again.

"Now breathe," his voice reverted back to that gentle, but commanding tone. He took a deep breath with you, in and out before staring you dead in the eyes. "Everything is going to be okay. It might not be perfect, but we will make it through this. Every battle has an end. Don't go giving up until you find your ending." You felt the grip on your shoulder tighten, his Adam's apple bobbing as he continued, "Please... Hold on for me."

That left you picking your jaw off the floor before Levi mentioned it, not able to do anything but nod. You, a cadet, had gotten him to say please.

"There is so much to live for in this life," he noticed your doubt before you even said a word. "Let's start living for the people who don't get to, who don't have a choice."

A comforting silence settled into the atmosphere. Levi smiled before standing, mentally double-checking if you were okay. "Oh, and one more thing?" You perked up when he spoke.

"I'll break your fucking legs if you talk about me being soft, cadet."

Ah. There was the Levi you knew.

"Wouldn't dream of it, captain," you said gently, proudly saluting him as he walked towards the back exit.

You would never know, but an extremely proud smile graced his features as he watched you hesitate before throwing the journal away.

#x reader #levi ackerman #levi #levi x you #levi x y/n #levi x reader #aot #attack on titan #comfort #attack on titan angst #is this enough tags #i am a mess

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animeyanderelover · 3 years

Note

Howdy! Thank you for the last request I loved it! Could I request a Yandere Mikasa Ackerman with a fem s/o? Prompt 25. “This might sound weird, but I like it when you’re sick. Because then you let me take care of you.” Thank you again for this!

Mikasa is one badass of a woman. She’ll be aged up in here.

Warnings: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessiveness, obsessiveness, Yandere breaking into the house, sick s/o

Prompt 25: “This might sound weird, but I like it when you’re sick. Because then you let me take care of you.”

It hadn’t been a good idea to not tell Mikasa that you had catched fever and a really bad cough. You just simply didn’t want to interrupt her from all the shit she had currently with her. She was an important part of the scouts and one of the strongest soldiers in there. And she shouldn’t miss too much time from being a help for humanity just because your body had been too silly to defend itself against this virus. She had more important things to do than caring for you. That’s what you had told yourself. That had been the reason why you hadn’t told her yet. You didn’t want her to worry too much because Mikasa was a bit too overprotective. Okay, maybe that was an understatement. She was very overprotective. You couldn’t exactly blame her after all that had happened to her. Losing her parents and witnessing her foster mother being eaten had left scars on her mind which had never fully healed. And sure, you found it sometimes very cute when she insisted on feeding you or carry your things. But your problem was that she did it all the freaking time. She didn’t let you do anything on your own and as soon as you hurt yourself because you did something without her help, she never let you do it again. You remembered that one time where you had cut yourself whilst chopping vegetables. That was something which could happen to everyone. But Mikasa had made a fuss about it as if you had just lost your whole hand. After that she had never again let you help in the kitchen, telling you she would do it for you.

So if that had been her reaction when you had cut yourself you didn’t want to find out what she would do upon discovering that you were sick. The last time you had seen her was yesterday and even then you had already felt not good. But as soon as you had opened your eyes today? Your throat felt like someone had just shoved buckets of sand down, your head had been pounding painfully, your body felt hot and cold at the same time and your muscles felt like they had been made out of jelly. It had taken you more energy than it should have to stand up and make yourself breakfast which you hadn’t even eaten in the end. That’s when you had decided to take a day off. That had only been a few hours ago and you had informed one of your neighbors to excuse yourself from work. Right now you were laying limply deeply burried into your mattress, completely hidden under your blanket. You didn’t feel like moving at all. You knew that you should make yourself some tea or hot soup, drink something or get a doctor. But you honestly hadn’t the energy. But it wasn’t like you would die on this. You had witnessed worse than this than a fever. Another coughing fit came over you and your whole body started shaking. “That sucks.”, you managed to press out, your voice hurting your dry and sensitive throat. You groaned and turned around, feeling too tired to keep your eyes for much more longer open.

That was at least until you noticed something that nearly gave you a heart attack. You had covered yourself from head to toe with your blanket, but had one spot left open for fresh air to come in. And in that small opening you saw someone giving you a truly horrifying look. At first you just froze and stared at those eyes, feeling like the intensity in them could actually kill you. But your paralyzed state only lasted for a few seconds before you let a scream out and threw the blanket away from you, fully prepared to make a run for it. But before you could even touch the cold floor with your feet you were suddenly slammed back into bed, forcefully tugged into the blanket once again. And that’s when you finally realized who your intruder was. “Mikasa?!”, you yelled shocked. Your voice scratched painfully against your throat, making you groan and lay your hand above the area where it was hurting. Not only that, but in that moment another coughing fit came over you, making you quickly turn into the other direction. You didn’t want to make Mikasa sick as well even though you doubted that she would get that easily ill like you. What was she doing here? Did she come to check up on you? But how did she even got into the house?

“Mikasa, how did you get-“ She hushed you by laying her index finger over your lips. “Save your voice.” You pressed your lips together and nodded, not daring to disobey her. The look she had given you only a few minutes ago still being present in your head. Mikasa removed her finger and layed her hand instead on your forehead, checking your temperature. She removed her hand and stood up, towering over you. You blinked up to her. “Why didn’t you tell me?” On her face was a disappointed look and you could have sworn that her voice had sounded almost...rebuking. But before you could answer her she continued:”Were you worried that I would miss some important stuff with the scouts?” You nodded slowly, carefully observing her. What would she do now? You wanted to sit up and tell her that you were fine, wanting to tell her that you could take care of yourself. But as soon as you tried to force your weak body to move she gently pressed you down again. “I’ve already taken a look in your kitchen. You haven’t eaten anything so far. Your breakfast is still lying there. Your throat must hurt too much whilst swallowing. And you are obviously too exhausted to move. That’s why you couldn’t make yourself a herbal tea or soup. But you don’t have to worry about that anymore. I’m here now. I’ll take care of you.”

She gave you a quick kiss on the forehead before standing up and walking out of your room. “Be a good girl and stay in bed. If you even do as much as letting on of your toes touching the ground I’ll tie you to your bed so you can’t leave it.” You let some half hearted laughter out. “What a nice joke.” She glanced at you shortly over her shoulder. You couldn’t find even a trail of amusement in there. “Wait! That was a joke, right?” Another sharp glare from her made you shut up, remembering that she had told you to not overuse your voice. You heard her walking into the kitchen and shortly after the clinking of iron and wood in there. “She wouldn’t really tie me up, would she?”, you thought worriedly. For a short moment you felt tempted to try out before quickly pushing that decision aside. No, you didn’t want to find out. You couldn’t imagine that being tied up to your bed would be really comfortable. And your body ached anyways as soon as you moved even a muscle. So just relaxing and basking in the softness and warmth of your bed was much more appealing to you. So you just let yourself sink into the mattress, letting a small and content sigh out when feeling the pillow gently lulling you into sleep. Before your eyes finally closed the question how she had gotten into your house crossed your mind once again. Before you were completely swallowed by darkness you decided to ask her later and get an answer from her.

You were stirred up from your peaceful sleep by feeling Mikasa gently shaking your shoulder. The strong scent of herbsoup. You turned sluggish around, needing to keep blinking in order to not close your eyes for too long. Your eyes darted from Mikasa to the soup plate she was holding in her hands and the glas of water standing on your nightstand. “Wat’cha want?”, you mumbled, still drunk on sleep. “I know you’re tired, but your body needs energy to heal itself. You need to eat this. I made sure to not make it too bitter. But just in case I brought you a Glas of water.” Truth told, you weren’t a fan of those kind of soups. They tasted awful. But you kind of knew that Mikasa wouldn’t let this count as a reason. So you sat up in slow motion and dragged your hand upwards to grab the spoon sticking out of the steaming liquid. That was until Mikasa suddenly grabbed the spoon. “I’ll feed you.” Not again. “Mikasa,”, you began, trying to reason with her,”I know that I’m ill and not in my best condition. But that doesn’t mean that I can’t-hmm!” You were interrupted when she suddenly shoved the spoon in your mouth. “Swallow it.” You did as you were told. The warm liquid felt nice and warm whilst flowing down your throat, making all the scratching parts hurt less. But it was the terrible aftertaste that made your whole face twist for a short second in a ugly mask. And to think about that you had to eat the whole plate to make Mikasa satisfied.

“One is done. Only a few handful more to go.”, Mikasa said in a praising tone and scooped the next spoon up. This time you were smart enough to cover your mouth with your hands before speaking:”Don’t you have work to do? I mean, the scouts probably need you right now.” “The work I have to do now is more important. Eren and Armin already agreed on working harder to make up for my absence.”, she answered you. “What if you get in trouble or become sick yourself? Or what if-“ Once again Mikasa interrupted your babbling about trying to find a way to not let her forc feed you. “(y/n).” Her voice was gentle, yet stern. “I couldn’t care less about getting in troubles with my superiors. And I don’t mind getting infected from you. It would only give me an excuse more to stay with you. Now remove your hands and let me feed you. Or I’ll make you.” This was the part where you would have normally always started to argue with her about that you weren’t a small child that needed their mama to do anything for them. She would always listen calmly to your arguments before countering back and insisting on letting her take care of you. You needed to give one thing to her. Mikasa had in such situations always the patience a mother had with her toddler. But after some time she would always become a bit more forceful and do what you were just about to do for you. It had often happened that she had ripped whatever you had been supposed to carry out of your hand and quickly running away with it whilst you had chased after her. And when it came to eating it was either that she always shoved the food in whenever you opened your mouth or just forced you to open your mouth.

The thing was that you hadn’t the chance to even try to put up a fight now. Not with your whole body being drained out of it’s energy. And you also weren’t in the mood to start struggling. All you wanted was just laying down again and continue sleeping. Your slightly tensed shoulders slumped down in defeat and you just opened your mouth. This caused a small smile to appear on Mikasa’s face and she quickly shoved it into your mouth. This continued for some time until you noticed to your huge relief that you had nearly finished everything. “This might sound weird, but I like it when you’re sick. Because then you let me take care of you.” This caused you to give Mikasa a shocked look. “So you like it when I feel like shit?” She quickly shook her head. “No. I didn’t mean it like this...” “But?”, you asked. “It’s just nice that you let me do everything for you without me having to get a bit more strict.” You blinked at her a few times, not quite believing that she had actually had said this. “You enjoy this, don’t you?”, you asked before grabbing the glass of water and washing up all the bitter aftertaste the soup had left. Mikasa on the other hand just stared at you, making you raise an eyebrow at her.

“I know I look terrible.”, you told her in a half jokingly tone. “I think you’re beautiful.”, she told you sincerely. You quickly turned away, trying to hide the slight pink dusting your cheeks. “You look always beautiful to me (y/n).”, Mikasa continued, making the blush on your face deepen. But luckily Mikasa didn’t seem to want to continue. Instead she just pressed you once again into your pillow. “Now get some rest. If you need something just call for me. I’ll be here for you.” You hummed in response, the soup taking it’s effect on you. You just snuggled yourself tighter into your bed whilst Mikasa made sure that you were tightly tugged into your blanket. She gave you one last kiss on the forehead, letting her lips stay there for a short moment before pulling away and leaving your room. But she stopped one last time in the door frame. “(y/n)?” You gave some sort of noise from you, signaling her that you were listening. “The next time you’re sick you inform me instantly or else I’ll have to break your door open again.”

#yandere attack on titan #yandere aot #yandere shingeki no kyojin #yandere snk #yandere mikasa #yandere mikasa ackerman

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kurosara · 3 years

Text

Hongjoong x Reader

I didn’t proofread this or anything. I just wrote some middle of the night comfort I needed.

Angst, sad

I felt my spine unconsciously shiver as yet another cool breeze fluttered heavily past me. A quick glance at my phone told me it was nearing 3 in the morning. The dim light of the screen faded, as my eyes cast back to the bare sky. It was a new moon tonight, and there weren’t many stars out either. There wasn’t anything interesting in the chilly fall weather, unless you counted the never slowing raindrops falling down my cheeks.

Why was I even crying again?

I couldn’t remember. I’d been crying that long. It hadn’t felt like it, but I’ve been sitting on the balcony of my bedroom, suffering in the chilled air, for nearly 6 hours. How long could such an overwhelming feeling last?

An eternity…

A cynical voice taunted me further with evasive thoughts similar to this. It’s dark, and lonely. I’ve whispered curses and wishes to no one. I’ve replied to… no one. Because all I could wonder was if anyone was really listening. The neatly decorated interior, fit with (f/c) furniture and various art pieces and large photos of me and my boyfriend hanging on the wall, felt eerily cruel the moment I walked in. The fleeting thought of my boyfriend stuck for a moment, like the breath hitching in my throat as I visualized his soft smile, a bit of nervousness from smiling at me for the very first time. The happy thought turned sour, the smile fading into a blank stare.

“I’ll be home late…”

The image dissipated with his words. I could barely taste the remnants of the ramen bowl I’d forced down before coming out onto the balcony. The taste was bitter and dry as I forcefully swallowed the growing lump of anxiety. My fingernails, or rather the remaining nubs since I’d chewed off all my nails earlier, felt sticky as they scratched nervously at the cold concrete I was sitting on. I could only assume it was blood from the scraping contact. The balcony’s railing taunted me similar to bars of a jail cell. But at least in prison there are other people.

But here? In this dark and lonely space I created for myself? There is no one. I’ve self-isolated. And every attempt to escape has never been followed through. If I unlocked my phone you’d see the contact pulled up where I’ve nearly called him. And before that a lengthy text that boiled down to one thing; I need you. The text was never sent of course. However, even now as I describe these feelings and sensations, I don’t feel them. They aren’t processed in my mind or my physical body. I simply sat in the corner of the balcony, knees pulled to my chest, staring into pure dark, as my body and the world continued past my racing thoughts of how this is where I should be.

I deserved to be alone.

Keys jingled in the background and it was painfully obvious the individual tried being quiet, but it wouldn’t matter. He could’ve kicked the door in screaming, and I wouldn’t budge an inch.

Hongjoong removed his shoes and hung up his coat on the nearby rack. His bag made a soft sound as he tried to gently slide it onto the couch, hoping his partner was sleeping peacefully, and trying not to disturb that. As he typically did when he ended up home this late, he trekked to the kitchen for a bottle of water to carry to bed. As he exited the kitchen, a cold breeze caught his attention.

Where’s that coming from?

Just like Hongjoong. He knew how much I hated being the slightest bit cold, so the house was always a warm temperature. He narrowed his eyes slightly as he gazed around the empty living room, noticing the cracked balcony door. Cautiously, he approached the door, peering out just the slightest bit and hoping there was no intruder lurking around.

Though he’d really hoped for that to be the case right now versus the sight he was met with.

His eyes barely made out my trembling figure in the corner, huddled against the wall. Immediately Hongjoong turned on the outdoor light and rushed to my side, carefully kneeling beside me.

“Y-y/n?” The worry was so thick in his voice, yet sweet. Like honey.

There he was. My boyfriend. Acknowledging my presence as he always does, yet I hadn’t heard a word. There was no light, though he very clearly turned one on. For a moment Hongjoong panicked. His eyes worriedly scanned my body, searching for any signs of hurt or reason for my being like this. He saw the bloody fingers and the tears still flowing. He knew what was happening, for sadly he’d seen it too many times even before they were dating. At least more times than I’d like. By now though, Hongjoong knew almost how to help. He adjusted his position to sit in front of me, his knees pulled up like mine. He touched his knees to mine, gently pulling my hands from the concrete as he rubbed soothing circles with his thumbs.

I felt the tingling of sensation from the touch, still all I saw was a never ending tunnel of darkness. Hongjoong brought my knuckles to his lips, placing gentle kisses on them before resting them onto our knees. His thumbs didn’t stop caressing the top of my hands as he simply stared into my eyes and mustered the kindest smile he could as he looked at my broken state.

“I know you probably won’t process what I’m saying right now, and that’s alright. Just focus on my voice ok?” He took a shaky breath, feeling his own tears well up, “You’ve been having a hard time lately haven’t you? I know you’ve been eating well and everything because I’ve seen it, but that doesn’t mean you’re alright. And it’s ok to not be ok. It’s not your fault.”

There was a flicker of light, like a shooting star passing across my vision. I swallowed another lump, feeling a bit of warmth from the original tingling sensation.

Hongjoong squeezed my hands, trying to urge warmth into your shivering body. Just the thought of how long you could’ve been freezing made him sick to his stomach. Nonetheless he continued to talk as calmly as he could.

“Just remember that there is someone here for you. I know you don’t always believe that, but it’s true. I am here. Right here.” A single tear rolled down his cheek unwillingly. “I’ll help you pick up the pieces you feel are broken and hold them together for you. I’ll be here to hold you steady when you’re shaking and keep you warm when you’re cold. I’m sorry I was late this time. There’s no telling how long you’ve been here.” Another tear. “But I’m here now baby. I love you.” He squeezed my hands gently once more.

Like a thread, his words formed a silver lining in the dark tunnel. My vision corrupted from pure black, to blurry shapes and images. The feeling of being frozen to my core was slowly warming in the places where his body touched mine. And finally, his beautiful, kind smile. So bright, and such a contrast to the dark space I’d been suffering in. There was a soft ringing that slowly got louder, as I realized his lips were moving. Hongjoong was speaking, yet I could only hear the ringing. Hongjoong saw the way my eyes scanned his face just the smallest bit. His smile grew a bit.

“There you are. It’s ok. Take your time.” He leaned forward, never breaking eye contact as he kissed the back of my hands lovingly.

I squeezed his hands gently, the feeling, or void of feeling, was quickly fading, and in its place a crushing weight on my throat and lungs. My chest heaved at my increased breathing pace, worrying Hongjoong as he realized the anxiety was setting in more than the previous emptiness. Without releasing my hands, he scooted to sit beside me. He let go of one hand to wrap his arm around my shoulder, leaving a gentle kiss on my temple as he whispered sweet nothings.

His voice trickled in like a small river, every other word registering before his kindness fully processed. My beating heart didn’t slow, but it became easier to breathe as I buried my head in the crook of his neck silently. He pulled me closer with one arm, resting his forehead on my hair.

“Do you want to go inside and get under the blankets?” The first full sentence I’d registered in my mind.

I absentmindedly nodded, but before I could attempt to move, Hongjoong was picking me up bridal style, careful like I was an expensive glass or diamond jewelry. Once in our shared bedroom, he placed me on the bed before tossing back the covers and tucking them around me like a child. With a reassuring smile he left the room. Although I knew where he was going, I gripped the covers tightly anxiously waiting for his return.

In a matter of minutes Hongjoong returned with two cups of hot chocolate with small marshmallows, and a pack of hershey’s kisses tucked under his arm too. He set one cup down and offered me the other, which I had to fumble from under the covers to shakily take the cup. The warm liquid felt comforting, with just a splash of caramel the way I loved it. A soft melody played as Hongjoong connected to the bluetooth speaker on the dresser, playing soft instrumentals he had been working on the days prior. Hongjoong climbed into the bed, careful of me and my drink, and opened the chocolates, feeding me one as he grabbed his own drink.

He took the drink gently from me, and pulled a small first aid kit from his pocket, beginning to tend to my wounded fingers. He tried to be as gentle as possible, though I couldn’t stop the involuntary flinching everytime there was direct contact to the broken skin. He continued mumbling soft apologies and comforting words nonetheless. Once he finished wrapping my fingers, he continued with his early motion of serving me my drink and feeding me hershey kisses.

I’m not sure how long we sat like that. Hongjoong rested his head against the headboard, one hand gently playing with strands of my hair, while the other held my own hand. Originally, he had alternated between feeding me chocolates and bringing his now cold drink to his lips. The time on Hongjoong’s phone read 5:52 am. I had long since finished my drink and passed out with my head on his shoulder sometime after 4 I think. Hongjoong hummed softly to the still playing music, like a soothing lullaby. He wanted to make sure I was fully asleep before deciding to move.

Hongjoong gently laid me on the pillow, going to turn off the lamp he’d had on and turning the music down a little more, before crawling back into bed. He cuddled me from behind, his warm chest pressed against my back as he pulled me closer to him in a tight embrace.

“Goodnight my love. Have sweet dreams. When you wake, I’ll be here. I promise. I won’t let you be lonely in the dark if I can help it. I love you. So I hope you use that love as a light. It’s not too late. So don’t give up, ok? We can do this. I love you.”

With a simple kiss to my head, he nuzzled closer, leaving me with floating thoughts.

It’s not too late. I’m not alone.

#hongjoong x reader #fanfic #ateez

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silksoftstars · 3 years

Text

It hurts

Paring: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Characters: Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers, Tony Stark, Sam Wilson, Natasha Romanoff, Wanda Maximoff, Clint Barton

Summary: Your mother died and you don't know how to deal with it. Bucky wants to help you.

Word count: 1200+

Warning: Character death (mentioned), angst, sadness, blood, minor injury, cancer

It had been a long time coming, but when it happened you were so unprepared. You knew it was going to happen, but it still hit you so hard.

The Avengers worried about you. You hadn't left your room since it happened. You had locked them all out and ordered Friday to not let anyone in, not even your boyfriend Bucky.

Your mom had been sick for years. It was cancer. You always knew that your time was limited with her. But when she died it broke you. She had been the only family you had left.

Your mom had been your rock, your support. Every time you had felt sad or upset in the past you went to your mom. And she had helped you, supported you, build you up. And now you had nothing. You had never been so sad so broken.

And your mom wasn't there to help you. She just wasn't there anymore. You were alone. Completely and utterly alone. You felt like you had no one in the world who would understand you and just hold you.

You knew that wasn't true, that you were doing Bucky and the Avengers wrong. A irrational feeling and it made you feel even worse, because it was unfair to them but you couldn't help it. You just were stuck in you head.

The Avengers all had watched how you slowly fell apart, watching your mom in the hospital, hooked up on wires, getting weaker every day.

You were lying in your room on your bed like you had for the last two weeks. The air was warm and spent, your pillow had wet spots from your tears and some dried blood on the one end. A picture of you and your mom lay shattered on the floor.

In a moment of rage you had thrown it against the wall and regretted it immediately. You accidentally had stepped into a sharp glass shard on your way into the bathroom. It was the only time you even got up, when you had to use the toilet or you grabbed the food that someone, probably Bucky had placed in front of the door.

You hadn't tried to patch up the wound. It didn't matter to you, you didn't feel the pain. At least you had removed the shard from your feet and had thrown it back on the floor.

You had lost weight and muscles, when you looked in the mirror on your way to the toilet, you saw someone staring back at you, a pale face, sunken eyes and messy hair.

You were lost. You didn't know what to do, how to go on.

What you didn't know was that the avengers were worried sick about you. The tower was quiet without you, no laughter echoed through the hallways like it did before. They all missed you and wished that you would let them in, talk to them.

Tony monitored your vitals constantly, knowing how bad it felt to loose a parent. He worried that you didn't take care of yourself like you should. And while he respected your wishes and didn't overwrite your orders for Friday to forcefully open your door, it calmed his nerves to know that if there was an emergency he could be in your room in seconds.

Natasha buried herself in work to distract herself, spending hours over hours in the gym. Clint often sat in a vent over your room, watching you. You know he was there, you sometimes heard his sighs, but you didn't care as long as he left you alone.

Wanda often left the compound to escape. Your emotions were too intense for her to handle all the time. Even when she intentionally tried to block you out, she still felt your grief in the back of her mind and it overwhelmed her, reminding her painfully of what she had lost too.

Steve and Sam took over most of the missions. They were the most capable to separate their feelings from their decisions. Normally they would've taken Nat with them, but she wanted to stay in case you needed her.

And Bucky was a mess. He stayed in front of your room for days, listening to your sobs, your cries and screams and it broke your heart.

He only left when he placed food in front of your room, knowing you would only take it when you were certain that nobody saw you and had the chance to talk to you. The soldier even had slept in front of your room.

He was irritable and lashed out because of small things, not that anyone would've taken it personally.

Finally after four weeks he had enough. The brunette just knew that you needed him, even though you couldn't ask for help or admit it to yourself.

So he convinced Tony to open your door. Well he didn't have much convincing to do. So Tony overwrote the protocol and Bucky found himself in front of you door once again.

Slowly, quietly he opened your door and stepped in. And the sight broke his heart. You were laying on the bed on your back, staring at the ceiling. Your eyes had dark circles underneath them, your lips were cracked open.

Further looking around he saw glass and blood on floor and spotted you encrusted foot that hadn't fully healed yet.

"Oh baby," Bucky sighed sadly and walked over to you while avoiding any shards. You didn't look at him, just continued staring up.

He sat down next to your head and gingerly stroked over your neglected knotted hair. When you still didn't respond to that, he scooted back against the headboard.

Then he grabbed you gently pulled you by your arm pits onto his lap and wrapped his arms around you. The brunette wanted you to know that he was here, he had nothing to say, there was nothing to say to make it better, but he hoped that if he just held you, you would feel a small bit better.

It did in a way. The pain didn't go away, but you didn't feel as lonely as before. You relaxed into Bucky and without realizing you started crying again. You turned in Buckys grip and buried your head in his shoulder.

There were no words exchanged while you sobbed, your boyfriend just held you close, stroked over your back and placed kisses on your head from time to time.

"I don't know how to keep going," you finally croaked out, your voice broke in the end. It was raw and it hurt to speak.

"It just hurts so much," you whimpered and clung onto Bucky like a lifeline.

"I can't promise you that it will stop hurting but I promise that I'll be with you every step of the way. And the team too. We all missed you," the soldier answered.

"I missed you too," you whispered and gave Bucky a sad smile.

A comfortable silence washed over the two of you and for the first time since your mom had died you felt a piece of happiness. And it gave you hope.

Somehow now you knew that Bucky would be at your side and be the support you needed. And you would be okay.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes x reader #tony stark #steve rogers #sam wilson #natasha romanoff #wanda maximoff #clint barton #the avengers #avengers x platonic reader #avengers x y/n #avengers x you

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mortedeveles · 4 years

Text

Model For Me

HERE: PART FIVE.

PART ONE. PART TWO. PART THREE. PART FOUR. PART SIX.

Summary: Y/N has always been a timid and awkward person and artist when it comes to social interactions and it only gets worse when she asks her crush and best friend, Katsuki Bakugou, to model for her.

And not just any type of modelling; Y/N needs to do a composition of a nude male body. Luckily for her, Katsuki’s personality is anything but shy and he doesn’t hesitate to undress in front of her. It’s for art, he says. But something tells Y/N that the boy has hidden and devious intentions, intentions that she has to unravel and discover.

Genre: fluff, humor, suggestive content (a wee bit of NSFW themes)

TW: cursing, sexual themes, nudity.

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x fem!artist!reader

________

QUIRK: LIQUIFY! Y/N can manipulate any type of liquid to her advantage and can also melt inanimate objects, but doesn’t work on animals, plants, or people. And at night time she can make any type of liquid into a solid!

_________

a/n: hellooo! i have an AUTHOR’S NOTE at the end and I would appreciate if you guys took the time to read it! as always, please leave a like, follow, reblog and/or comment if you enjoyed! i really appreciate it!

I don't like Katsuki.

I don’t like Katsuki.

We're just... friends.

You kept repeating the words in your head for a week, but it was useless. You were lying to yourself and you knew it- the feelings you had for Katsuki weren't platonic.

They had never been platonic, perhaps at the beginning of your friendship they were, but not anymore.

Since your last modeling session, you did your best to stay under the radar and avoid Katsuki. What he had said was simple and true, but whenever you recalled the moment, you wanted to scream. Maybe avoiding him wasn't the best idea- considering the fact that he hated being ignored, but you couldn't handle being close to him.

You had been perfectly aware that you had a crush on Katsuki but when he stated that you two weren't anything, why were you trying so hard to convince yourself you didn't like him?

Every glance you shot his way made your heart ache. Watching from a distance only reminded you of reality- you're nothing to him. Just a friend.

You were a friend and nothing else. He was way out of your league- you would never be able to tangle your life with his.

He was one of the top three of 1A, possessed a marvelous quirk and although he could have murderous tendencies, his determination and strength left you breathless.

But...you? You were only becoming a Pro Hero because your parents had pressured you into it and you didn't have a choice. If it was up to you, you would be a professional artist. Liquify wasn't an extraordinary quirk, compared to Katsuki's.

You were nothing compared to him.

These negative and insecure thoughts flooded your mind for the next few days, and without even realizing, you had placed some distance between your friends and yourself, including Katsuki.

It was Wednesday and throughout the entire school day you had escaped from Katsuki- twice. Today you had your art class and you desperately needed to talk to Aneko.

If you could talk to someone- Aneko in particular- about your current situation, you knew that it would remove the invisible weight from your shoulders.

Ranting out loud had always helped you calmed down and it was just what you needed today. Though, the interactions you avoided with Katsuki today were making you feel more stressed and overwhelmed by the minute.

When the final school bell rang, you blocked out any noise and began to pack your materials quickly. You didn't notice how Katsuki called out for you twice and how there was a glimpse of sadness on his face before it was quickly replaced by an angered expression. Or how Mina was carefully watching the scene.

You were a foot away from stepping out of school grounds when a pair of familiar warm and heavy hands clamped down on your shoulders.

You practically ran out of the school buildings and picked up your speed when you heard Katsuki's explosions. By the sounds of it, he was not happy.

You can do it, you thought. If you can just make it to the end of the day without talking to him, everything will be fine.

''Fucking hell!'' he growled. ''Do I always have to grab you like this, you shitty girl?!'' you were used to Katsuki's shouts and insults, but this time his words made you flinch.

No, no! You wanted to scream. I can't face Katsuki today, not right now! Why can't he leave me alone?!

Your body froze on the spot, but you refused to turn around. One look at his bright red eyes would render you useless.

''Why the fuck won't you look at me?!'' he forcefully turned you around but you struggled to meet his gaze.

''I...I'm...,'' your face was burning out of embarrassment but just as you predicted, your heart ached when you met his gaze.

He was so, so close to you and yet, so far out of your reach.

''I have to go,'' you murmured and tugged his hands away from your shoulders.

Katsuki stared at you with a bewildered look and you grew painfully aware of the sudden audience you had. Several students were near you, watching the scene develop as they giggled and murmured with each other.

''Hah?!" despite the aggressiveness in his tone, Katsuki dropped his hands and glared daggers at your head as you walked away.

You didn't dare look back and your entire body was tense- fearing that Katsuki would shout or chase after you. But once you took notice that he did neither, you felt your body relax.

Though, Katsuki never took his eyes off you. He watched you with a peculiar expression as you fled from the school.

Once you arrived at the train station and stepped into the train, you sat down and pressed your palm over your heart. It was racing and the thumping of your heart roared in your ears.

''Everything will be okay,'' you murmured to yourself. You made sure to keep your voice low enough so no one besides yourself could hear.

''You'll get through this.''

When the train roared to life and the journey to the recreative center begun, you closed your eyes and doze off to the sound of your heart beat.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

''Y/N. Let me see your progress,'' you quickly handed over your art piece to your teacher. She hummed and pushed her glasses onto the bridge of her nose, raking her eyes over the details that held all your effort.

''It's looking beautiful so far, Y/N,'' you smiled and clasped your hands together. Her compliment made your heart swell.

''Thank you, miss!" you outstretched your hands to receive your artwork but faltered when your teacher frowned and stared closely at your work.

''Is this...this boy seems very familiar...'' she murmured. You felt panic invade your veins and you discretely took your artwork with a shrug.

''Maybe you've seen him on TV, miss! I wouldn't know, he's just a friend of mine...,'' you laughed awkwardly and quickly stashed your work into your backpack. Aneko was watching the two of you with a mischievous smile and once your teacher nodded and stepped away to attend other students, she laughed loudly.

''Afraid that sensei is going to steal your boyfriend?'' she winked but you felt your stomach drop at her words. ''Don't worry, he only has eyes for you,'' she crooned. You groaned in response and shook your head.

''I don't want to hear about Katsuki again,'' you grumbled angrily. Aneko frowned and crossed her arms.

''Wait, why? Is everything okay between the two of you?''

Your hand faltered and hovered above your backpack and you swallowed visibly.

''I...I don't know,'' you murmured and sighed loudly.

Aneko frowned and clutched your hand, squeezing it comfortingly.

''I would really like that.''

''If you want to talk about it, I can come over today,'' the teasing tone in her voice had quickly left and there was nothing but concern and understanding in her voice.

You smiled and nodded.

Half an hour later, you find yourself sitting on your bed. Aneko is sitting next to you as the two of you munch on unhealthy snacks.

''So?'' Aneko asked between bites. ''What's up?''

You sighed and dropped the snack on the bed. This would take long.

''As you know, I've had feelings for Katsuki for like, since the beginning of studying at U.A. We've only been friends and that's okay with me, but something changed in the last session.'' you let out another dramatic sigh and grab a chip.

''Actually, since the second session, Katsuki has been acting a bit weird...'' you grumbled and crossed your arms. ''He's been oddly quiet and sometimes even distant and well, mom was home in our last session.''

You heard Aneko choke and splutter. Her reaction made you laugh and shake your head in amusement.

''Oh my god,'' Aneko cackled. ''What did your mom say?!''

Nervously, you scratched your head and slumped your shoulders.

''There's the problem. Um... so we were having dinner together, and my mom asked us if we were a couple of and-,'' you were interrupted by Aneko's loud laughter.

''Jesus!" she wheezed and turned over in your bed. You snickered. ''Did she really say that?''

Your face warmed up at the memory and you nodded. ''Yeah! It was really embarrassing. Anyways...'' you faltered and lowered your voice. ''The thing is, I just said and Katsuki well, he said that we weren't dating. But when he said that, I don't know why it hurt so much? His tone was so cold and firm...'' You groaned and buried your head in your hands.

''I don't know what's wrong with me,'' your words were muffled behind your hands.

You heard Aneko sigh and gently remove your hands from your face.

''Nothing's wrong with you, babe. You like the guy, and that’s why it hurts,'' she offered you a smile.

''Tomorrow's our last session and I don't know what to do.''

Aneko hummed in response. She grinned deviously and clasped her hands together.

''Well then, that's it! Tomorrow, you should confess your feelings at the end of the session,''

Your mouth went dry and you swallowed thickly.

''What?'' was the first thing that came to you. ''No, I can't do that...''

Aneko sighed and cradled your face between her hands, making your cheeks look squishy.

''You can and you will, honey. The boy likes you, that's obvious. You should at least tell him how you feel,'' Aneko's gazed drifted away but quickly returned to you, this time with a grin on her lips. ''And who knows? You'll probably score a date for the weekend!" she shot you a wink.

''Just relax, Y/N. Don't overthink it. He likes you, and everything will be perfectly fine. Okay?'' she smiled softly.

You nodded and inhaled deeply. Aneko was right. You were stressing over nothing! Tomorrow would be the last session and by the end of it, you would make sure that your feelings were known to Katsuki.

But knowing your luck, things wouldn't go as planned.

''You're right,'' you forced a smile. ''There's nothing to worry about.''

hi guys! can’t believe i have 100 follows this fast. i really appreciate all the fb and support i receive from everyone <3 to celebrate 100 followers, i will be OPENING my REQUESTS! here’s some of the basic information;

-i will open my requests for 5-8 slots

-i will share a prompt list and you can choose a number, character and whatsover!

-my requests will be available for MHA and JJBA.

reminder: my requests are not open YET. i will post an individual post with all the details explained! this is just like an intro. if you’re interested, stick around to stay updated! xx

TAG LIST: @bakugou-is-my-daddy @justanotherlifeff @seokookchan @playboygeniusphilanthropist @awwjesus-gross @jenna-sakura @mykuronekome @ggclarissa @irenevyas @mrstodorooki @warmchoccymilk @coupsieddori @yikerb DM me if you want to be on my taglist or if I forgot to add you!!

#veles' writing #my hero academy fanfiction #my writing #reader insert #my hero fanfic #mha x reader #bnha bakugou #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou katsuki #fanfiction #mha x y/n #my hero academia

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slimy-vore-bog · 3 years

Text

Alright... Here’s the story I’ve been so hesitant to post.

It was written sometime before... hmm... Definitely Taste Test. So it’s old, but I have edited it a tiny bit.

Warnings are... Well... Really really graphic vomiting scene, unwilling prey, painful vore (for the pred) it’s also really just an odd and uncomfortable story. At least for me. I don’t think I would write anything like this again. Also, it’s makes me cringe in more ways than just being uncomfortable. It’s just edgy.

Pred Amity and Prey Luz.

Word Count: 2.3 k

***

"Amity? Is something wrong?" Amity hadn't even noticed she had been staring at Luz, before the human girl spoke up. "You seem a little distracted?"

"I'm fine, Luz," she didn't want to her the truth of how she had been feeling; and not in the romantic way. "I just..." she zoned back out, thinking back to her oh-so-delicious taste. Her mouth flooded with saliva in a matter of seconds. She wished for another taste, but Luz wasn't shrunken down like she was the other time. Not yet she isn't. The thought echoed in her brain. Could she do that? She had only tried the spell once before...

Luz snapped her out of her thoughts, "You just... what? Amity, you're making me concerned..."

"uh..." Amity look away from her. What to say? What to do? She couldn't tell her the truth... But what else could she do? "I don't know." In reality she really didn't know what was driving her so crazy about her crush's taste. It was just fruity, and she didn't even enjoy fruit that much! Maybe it was the idea of it being her crush, but that didn't make much sense either. Why would that make her so... irresistibly delicious? What made her that way?

"Hey, Amity, you're drooling again..." She could hear the nervousness in her friend's voice. Luz's eyes widened. "It's not because of me, is it?"

Amity looked over to her in shock.

"You have been acting like this ever since I had a look into your mouth." Realization soon filled Luz's eyes. "You... You weren't kidding, when you said you wanted to eat me, were you?"

Amity stayed quiet; not because she didn't want tell Luz, but she couldn't speak. At all. Too many thoughts were running through her head.

"Amity?" Luz called out, and that was when Amity lost control of herself.

She casted the spell, making Luz shrink down. Luz stared in disbelief, before Amity's hand reached out for her, and she ran.

But not long after, her fingers locked around her chest. Luz bit down into her fingers.

Amity lost her grip on her, making her fall onto the table. Hearing Luz's whine, immediately made her snap back to her own self.

"I'm sorry, Luz! I don't know, what happened!"

Luz's eyes were filled with fear. "Turn me back, Amity!"

She hesitated. She wanted to have another taste, but she didn't want to accidently do something she would regret. "Give me a second." She tried to cast the spell, but... it didn't work. What was wrong here? Was she not concentrating hard enough? "Hold on just a moment..." She was starting to get anxious, making it even harder to try. She was not going to betray Luz's trust like this.

"Amity, I'm serious, turn me back!"

"I'm trying, Luz! Give me a moment!" She yelled at her out of panic. She drew in a deep breath, before trying again, but it still didn't work. "Something's wrong!"

She lowered her hand, sitting back down. She ripped into her hair. "I'm sorry, Luz, I really can't figure it out." She pulled her hair harder as the thought of Luz's taste hit her again. I'm not eating her! Her breathing sped up in her panic. She panted with her mouth wide open, feeling her world spinning. Her. Breaths. Were. Too. Short... She felt like vomiting, as she clenched her stomach too tightly. She couldn't breathe. What was happening to her?

She could barely register Luz's voice, even if she could sense she was yelling. She's yelling, she's yelling at me! She cowered at her voice, not really knowing what she was saying. Without even realizing it, she had lost control of her body again.

She slammed her hands down, one on each side of the tiny human, drool dripping from the corners of her wide-open, panting, mouth and off her chin. EAT HER! her brain screamed at her. It was getting harder to disobey with every passing second. She felt her stomach roaring for the human to fill it. Her ears faintly caught Luz yelling her name, but she wasn't in control of herself anymore.

Luz turned around to run, that turned out to be the wrong thing to do. Amity snatched her fingers around Luz's leg, provoked by her running. Luz managed to catch herself on her hands, just before she would have slammed into the table.

Amity dragged her back across the table, like a cat playing with a mouse. She stuffed her into her mouth, as soon as she could. The flavor was almost too overwhelming; yet she still shoved more the human in. She could already feel Luz's hair tickle the back of her throat. She stopped for a moment, pulling her out a little. She had to enjoy her taste longer. The fruity aroma made her drool more than she thought was possible. Luz's clothes were soaked in seconds. She swallowed a mouthful of spit, wanting more of her taste.

There was another faint yell from inside her mouth, as Luz tried to push herself out, but Amity wasn't letting go off her food. Still, she was careful not to chomp down on her. Deep inside her mind; she didn't want to hurt Luz. But still she knew she wasn't quitting, before the girl was in her stomach.

Amity prepared to shove more of Luz in, but as she brought her hands up to her mouth; Luz did the work for her. Her kick, albeit short, shoved her straight forward into her throat. Amity took advantage of it; immediately swallowing her head.

It felt... horrible. The pain from her throat stretching, combined with the need to gag, made tears well up in her eyes. Yet, she wasn't stopping; she swallowed once again, ignoring the pain.

Luz didn't budge at all, but Amity wasn't giving up. She grabbed a hold of the human's legs, feeling them fighting against her fingers, as forcefully shoved her farther down. Swallowing again, the pain was even worse. She had, at least, gotten past her shoulders.

She felt Luz's tiny nails trying to dig into her tongue, but it was only a light tickling to Amity.

She shoved her even deeper in. She tasted good enough for Amity to ignore her pain.

She felt Luz lose her grip on her tongue, as her torso disappeared down her gullet. It was getting much easier to swallow the shrunken girl down.

She tipped her head back; ready for another big swallow, when Luz's voice finally reached her. "AMITY! PLEASE LET ME OUT!" She swallowed, out of surprise, as she snapped back again. She lost her grip, confused for a second, as her throat begged her to swallow her up. She looked down seeing Luz's legs sticking out of her mouth.

Her eyes widened, before she tried to gag her back up, but nothing happened. She grabbed a hold of her and tried desperately to pull her out, but with each pull it felt like her throat was going to rip open. It didn't help that she couldn't breathe at all.

Her lungs were painfully begging for another breath, but, with Luz in her throat, that wasn't going to happen. In her intense panic, her body decided for her that Luz wasn't coming back out. She gulped greedily; feeling Luz descent down her throat. Soon, nothing but her lower legs and feet remained in her mouth.

She felt tears build up in her eyes, as she realized what she had done. Swallowing once more; her tears prickled in her eyes, it was too late to spit her out. Luz's feet were the only thing that hadn't disappeared into her throat yet.

She felt her throat dragging on the last part of Luz, while her head spun from her lack of air. Once again, her body forced her to swallow, yet she wasn't quite able to breathe. Her vision was blurring, mostly from the sense of panic, and she felt lightheaded. She could still sense Luz's body painfully making the descent into her core. Agonizingly slow, and yet, terrifyingly quick.

She swallowed sickly, trying to just get it over with, so she could breathe. Her disgust with herself grew as she felt the lump, she knew was Luz, moving farther down into her. She felt the tears she had been holding back, starting to run down her cheeks.

When she could finally breathe again, her mind was too distraught to even appreciate it. She felt Luz slipping into her belly, filling her up in a way nothing ever had. For a moment, the feeling made her fall back into her trance. She placed a hand over her stomach, licking her lips. It was only when a purr escaped her, she snapped back. NO! You’re getting Luz out right now!

She was trying to vomit, but nothing was coming back up. Nothing other than a mouthful of puke. She got up on her feet, unsure what she was going to do. She had to find somebody to help her get Luz back out.

She heard Luz scream for help.

Again, she tried gagging this time pressing in on her stomach. She felt a little movement, but not nearly enough for her to get back up. Calm down, she told herself. You're not finding a solution while panicking. There had to be some way... magical or not. She heard Luz's voice scream out again. "Amity, let me out!" She felt her kick against her insides. "I don't... I don't want to die!"

Amity felt a new stream of tears coming on. She couldn't speak as she began running to find help. "Somebody, I need help!"

She ran, trying to figure out what was the best course of action. "Luz, I'm sorry!"

It was quiet from her gut; she hoped it was just because she didn't know what to say. Don’t be dead, don’t be dead, don’t be dead- Her mind raced, as she did, before she ran straight into Willow. “Argh!” she exclaimed, before falling onto the floor.

Willow rubbed her own back. “Amity, what’s wrong?”

There was a wild panic in her eyes. “I need help!”

She gave her a quick look up and down. “with what?”

Amity didn’t hesitate to tell her. “I ate Luz, and now I can’t get her back up! Is there some sort of plant that can make me puke?”

There was a spark of anger in Willow eyes, but she seemed to push it down. “Yes, there is, follow me.”

For a second, Amity wondered what made Willow believe her so quickly, but then again… why would she lie about this? She ran after Willow.

Willow shoved something into her hands. The smell alone was enough to make her feel sick. “Chew on it.”

(Graphic vomit scene)

Amity didn’t hesitate to do as she was told. Immediately, her stomach reacted, as she out a nauseating burp. It was followed quickly by another, as a bit of bile came with it. She got down on her knees not wanting Luz to take the drop from her full height. I’ve done enough to hurt her…

She could feel Luz making her way back up into her throat, as even more puke followed with. It was even more painful than it was when she swallowed her. She heaved and gagged, finally feeling it working. She was still begging inside her head for Luz not to be dead.

She hated the fact that there was no movement from the lump rising up her esophagus. Her tears burned as badly as her throat, as she cried. What kind of pain could she have put Luz through? It must have been a hundred times worse than what she was going through.

Slowly, yet surely, Luz was making her way back up. Amity could feel her head reenter her mouth, as her own vomit ran down her mouth covering her uniform. Another hurl of puke came up as more of Luz did too.

She brought her hands up to her mouth, as the first half of Luz was out. She was ready to grab her, when she slipped out.

She felt her throat let go of her, but her body was still not done trying to expel whatever was in it.

(end of graphic scene)

She took a moment to let her body rest, still heaving. But she was finally done puking. She looked down, realizing that Luz didn’t have a single burn on her, but also that she wasn’t conscious.

She was shaking, gently holding Luz. Luz grimaced, waking up in Amity’s hands. “Luz, you’re okay…” It was more to reassure herself than to tell Luz.

She looked over at Willow, before looking back to Amity. She looked like she wanted to say something, but chose not to. Amity carefully put her down on the floor, once again trying to cast the spell that would turn her back. She had realized what had been wrong last time. My mind wasn’t in it…

Luz immediately turned back to her regular size. “I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Amity spoke. Luz still stared at her. “I don’t know what happened.” She knew Luz would never forgive her, but she still needed to apologize. “I’m so sorry…”

Luz stared at her, before backing away. Amity couldn’t look her in the eyes anymore, as she got back up on her feet. She turned around, leaving the room, she was going to have to come back to clean up. And both of the students would need a change of clothes.

¨¨

When she had found what she was looking for, Luz and Willow were gone. She decided not to focus on it and just clean up the mess. It was the only way to keep her tears from making a reappearance. Why did I do that?

***

Did the ending with Willow just having a random solution make sense? Probably not... But it’s what I wrote.

I’m not sure I’d want you to have enjoyed this, so... Thanks for reading, I hoped you didn’t enjoy the story? xD But actually thanks for reading!

Have a great day/night! <3

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sunflowerspecter · 4 years

Text

in the dark of space, d.d.

summary: sometimes, not even galaxies can keep soulmates apart

warnings: cursing, angst like you wouldn’t believe, sorta some fluff, awkwardness and lovely angry outbursts

pairing: din djarin x reader

words: 2060

part: 3/6

note: hi so this is like, so so so so so late and i’m SO SORRY. i’ve really been meaning to update these and then i just DONT so i’m so sorry. i really do promise to try harder ahaha but also i’ve just been falling apart and the last one didn’t do as well! also if you see a bunch of code up above i was trying to embed the first two parts and idk if that worked or failed so yeah... also school is cancelled cause of the coronavirus so i might be working on some new things!! we’ll see.

Space is so, so very vast. There are so many stars, so many planets, so many beautiful and wonderful and evil and deadly things.

But even among all of these beautiful and wonderful and evil and deadly things, there are only so many hiding places.

“I have a plan,” Mando says to you, out of the blue, one day. You’re bouncing the child in your arms near his makeshift-crib, trying to get him to sleep.

“A plan?” you ask, not looking towards him, but keeping your attention toward the kid. Mando had been in the cockpit trying to decide where to go next for hours.

“We’re going to end this. This whole deal with the child. We’re going back to Nevarro.”

“What?” you say, setting the child down and turning to face him. “Mando, you’re outnumbered. They’ll kill you and me and take the child the second they see the ship.”

“I have a plan.” You wish he would stop staying that. There is a beat before he says,“And you won’t be there.”

“I won’t be there?”

“I’m going to get Cara to join me and you’re going to stay back on Sorgan. You’ll be fine there, you’ll live peacefully the rest of your days, unless you decide to go somewhere else.”

“What are you saying?” you ask, because you seriously can’t hear him. There’s blood pounding in your ears. “Mando, what are you saying?”

“I’m leaving you on Sorgan. In case something bad happens.”

Your jaw drops, and you shake your head. “Mando, I-”

“No,” he says, turning away from you. “It’s not up for debate.”

You raise an eyebrow at that, crossing your arms. “Oh? The rest of my fucking life isn’t up for debate?”

He doesn’t look at you. He’s silent. He doesn’t move a single muscle in his body. Until- “If you want to have a life, you’ll go to Sorgan and you’ll stay there.”

“I’m not letting you abandon me.” Your voice breaks halfway through saying it. “I’m not letting you abandon me like everyone, everyone else in my life!”

He shakes his head, still not looking at you. “I’m not abandoning you. This is what’s best for you.”

You wipe the tears from your face and push your shoulders back. “What’s best for me? You want to talk about what’s best for me? I’m from a different galaxy, goddamnit! You’re the only person I trust!”

“Well, these people will take care of you. But you can’t stay with me. I’m not safe.”

You groan, throwing your hands into the air and then through your hair. “You’re so stubborn! You don’t even realize that… that…” You groan again, shaking your head and storming off. You have no words for him. Well, you do. You just can’t say them outloud.

“Y/n! Y/n, wait!” he calls after you, but you can’t face him right now. You can’t.

It’s a little later, and you’re absentmindedly pacing in the kitchen (“kitchen”) area, twirling a knife in your hands. It was the first thing you saw, and you quite enjoyed throwing knives at things. You have… had, been working on defense training with Mando a little, and knives are your favorite. Which is, admittedly, dangerous, but hey, you were doing pretty good so far.

The Mandorian walks into the room, staring at you.

“What do you think you’re doing?” he asks, reaching over to take the knife out of your hands. You shake your head, trying to reach for it again.

“I was-”

“You’re going to hurt yourself.”

“I was just thinking things over, for goodness sake. I’m not going to hurt myself.”

He shakes his head, grabbing onto your wrist. You wince as he pulls your fingers away from your palm, revealing the deep cut. “Yeah, I can clearly see that you aren’t going to hurt yourself.” You ignore him, pulling your hand away painfully. You didn’t even realize you had scraped your hand.

“So I accidentally cut my hand, it’s not even that deep. Why do you care?”

He freezes, and you think you’ve hurt his feelings, but then you remember he doesn’t have those.

“You’ve been extra reckless lately. More so than usual. You’re going to get yourself killed.” He turns, then, waves at the kid before he tries to leave. The pain in your hand is evident, but you ignore it. You suppose you had been reckless lately, especially on the last planet you were on, when you ran out in front of him when he was going to get shot. Because he was a dumbass, for god's sake.

“Is that why you’re abandoning me?” you growl after him, and he sighs.

“I’m abandoning you so that you don’t die.”

“So what?” you scream. “So what if I die?” You regret the words as soon as they leave your mouth. You remember once yelling them at your mother. You and her had fought, and she was drunk, and she threw the wine bottle at you, and she said that you were a mistake, and you screamed that. You weren’t welcome home for a week after that.

The memory brings tears to your eyes and you beg yourself not to break down.

He’s in front of you in a second, hands on your shoulders, looking at you intently. Heat rises to your face and you look at the ground, and the child, anywhere but at him. He wipes a tear from your cheek. “I need you alive.”

You scoff. “You know what, you’re right to abandon me. I’m useless. I don’t know why you’ve kept me around this long.”

You’re sure that you look like a disaster. You’re sure that you are a disaster, and you don’t even care. You don’t have any reason to care anymore. You’re in another-fucking-galaxy and the only person you trust is leaving you.

“Y/n, what brought this on?” he asks, but you shrug away from him and walk by the child. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong?” you ask absentmindedly. You pick up the child, setting him on the table. He looks quizzically up at you, his eyes wide. You turn to your Mandalorian. “What’s wrong is that you’re abandoning me!” You pause, then sigh. “I’m in love with you,” you whisper.

He’s frozen in time, all of a sudden, and you almost laugh.

“It’s pathetic. It’s straight out of a fucking chick-flick. A cliche for the ages,” you mutter, wondering if you should jump out of the spaceship now or if you should wait until the child is sleeping.

“Y/n-” he starts, but you shake your head.

“No, no, don’t, because I already know what you’re going to say, and I don’t think I can bear to hear you say it.” You take a long pause, breathing heavily. “I get it, I do, but it hurts, however stupid it is. Even on the off chance you even felt the same, I know what you would say. ’We can’t, it’ll never work, I’m too busy being angsty and broody,’” You shake your head. He doesn’t say anything, the silent tension in the room growing by the second. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, this isn’t fair of me. I don’t know what came over me. Maybe just… forget I said anything.” You shake your head, embarrassed by your fit of passion.

“I, er. What if…” he begins, struggling to come up with the words.

“Don’t try to make me feel better.”

He steps towards you. “What if I don’t want to forget you said anything?” You freeze, looking at him, your eyebrows strung together. “What if I love you too?”

“Yeah,” you mutter. “What if?”

He laughs, this sort of half-laugh thing. “Wow, okay.” You give a sort of half smile back, realizing that he’s standing kinda really close and your breathing is kinda really heavy. “Y/n, I love you, too.”

“We can’t,” you suddenly say. “I’m too busy brooding and being angsty. You’ve heard my music collection.”

He laughs, this time. “I love your music collection.” You realize that his arms are around you. And your hands are on his chest. And you’re so. Close. To. Him. You smile, then lean your head against his shoulder.

“You’re the only person in the Universe who has ever loved me,” you say, and his arms tighten around you. “Someone once told me that humans have this instinct to love their offspring. My mother proved that can’t be true.”

“Your mother didn’t know that you didn’t need her to turn out smart, and beautiful, and kind,” he says, and suddenly, you think you’ve found home.

“Please don’t make me leave you,” you whisper. “Please don’t abandon me. Mando, I don't have anything besides you. Which is like super dependent, but this whole situation already sucks.”

He’s quiet. He steps back, shaking his head. You realize that this may be the last time you ever get to see him. But, then he says, “I won’t. I… I swear, I never will.”

~~~oOo~~~

It becomes clear to you, as you tuck the little green child that you’ve grown so fond of into bed, that your life has become anything but normal. But, that’s okay, you think, because you’re happy. You’re more happy in this spaceship with the strangest man you’ve ever met and this fifty-year-old child and the occasional appearance of badass space women than you ever were on earth.

It also becomes clear to you, as you lie in the Mandalorian’s arms one evening, that you and him have no ordinary relationship. For one, you’ve never seen his face, like, ever. And for another thing, you were kind of forcefully thrown into each other’s lives. But, that’s okay, you think. Because, damnit, it’s the healthiest relationship you’ve ever had with another human being. It’s the strongest bond you’ve ever had with another human. It’s the safest you’ve ever felt… ever.

“Mando,” you say quietly, and he hums. “Is that your real name?”

He hesitates, then says, “It’s a real enough name.”

You’re sitting in his lap, and he sits in the pilots seat, and you’re looking at the stars. It’s really, rather odd, you think. It feels so intimate, which, in all fairness, it is. It’s been a few days since your rather brash confessions, and you still haven’t figured out quite how this will work out. You decide, though, that you’ll ask yourself that afterwards. But for now you’re going to be as close to him as possible. You need that much.

“Why, hello,” Cara says, and you jump up, crossing your arms, leaning against the control panel carefully.

“Hey, hello,” you say, but she smiles knowingly.

“So, I’m not really qualified to look after this thing,” she says, the child tucked under one of her arms. You hold your hands out and she hands it off to you willingly.

“I won’t be able to look after you and the kid at the same time, and you can’t look after the kid while keeping your guard up,” Mando says, and Cara shrugs.

“What are you suggesting?” she asks, and you move your gaze from her to Mando.

“We add a party to our crew. And then we head to Nevarro.”

~~~oOo~~~

You sit in the cockpit while Cara and Mando talk to whoever it is assisting. The child stays with you, in your arms, and you just wait. And waiting means you have time to think. And having time to think means nothing good.

You realize that you’re probably going to die. This is it. You’re going to be dead. There’s no way to avoid it. I mean, your heart wants to trust Mando, but reasonably, this can’t end well.

You could go to Sorgan… but you won’t leave Mando. Not in a million years.

You hear voices from behind you. “So, where is the child?” an unfamiliar voice says. You turn around, and there’s Mando, Cara, and an unknown being.

“Kuiil, this is Y/n, Y/n, Kuiil,” Mando says, and Kuiil nods at you.

“It is truly a pleasure to meet you, Y/n,” he says, taking the baby from your arms, which you hesitantly let up.

“Do you think you’ll be able to build a sort of crib for him?” you ask gently, and Kuiil nods, a sort of smile on his face.

“I’ll get right on it.”

a/n: hi! like and reblog if u liked this pretty please and thank you!! also leave a comment if you feel like it! so sorry for this being so, so late. stay safe and happy darlings!

taglist: @marvels-blue-phoenix @simonsbluee @javert-delacour @loilko @jelly-snow-stark @mutantsandproud @ugly-wall-flower @taman-a @hollanfield (leave an ask or message or comment to be added or removed!)

#din djarin x reader #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian #din djarin #star wars #star wars x reader #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #x reader #reader insert

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nelllraiser · 4 years

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lessons learned | remmy & nell

LOCATION: the ring. PARTIES: @nelllraiser and @whatsin-yourhead SUMMARY: remmy and nell confront jax about remmy’s collar. CONTENT: non con (pheromones)

Remmy paced. This was happening. This was really happening. They were going to get this thing off. Lydia had helped them get rid of their promises to Jax, and it had felt like an entire ship of weight had lifted off their shoulders. Of course the first thing they’d done was tell Nell. And of course she wanted to help them get this stupid collar removed. Maybe she would even see this place for it truly was and quit as well. Maybe they could both just walk away from this after everything. Remmy could only hope. They wanted to be done with this part of their life. They wanted to never set foot inside that arena again. Their stomach still hurt sometimes, when they thought about it. They still saw it whenever they closed their eyes, felt it whenever pain spiked through their limbs. Hands clenched, they paced the road. Waiting for Nell. Kept their eyes on the alley that led to the entrance. She’d sounded angry, ready to barge in there and get this dealt with, and Remmy could only hope she wasn’t angry with them, for keeping this secret for so long, for not telling her. But she’d just dealt with everything with Bea, and her world was so different from theirs now. Finally, they saw her form appear down the road and they scurried towards her. “Y-your arms,” they noted, seeing them wrapped in bandages, “A-are you sure you wanna do this? W-we can wait.”

Nell probably shouldn’t be here. Even with some magical healing, her arms weren’t at one hundred percent, and seeing as she’d started with skin grafts before seeking out more supernatural assistance, there had been some complications to work around. So her injuries were still tender, though she could at least move with less pain now, as well as less chance of reopening the wounds. They’d told her she’d need to do healing sessions rather than it being a one and done because of all the energy it would take. But there wasn’t a question of whether or not she was going to come with Remmy to see Jax and whatever piece of shit might be in on this collar business. She didn’t entirely understand, as far as she knew- the Ring collars were meant for the disobedient monsters that were forcefully brought in my monster catchers like herself, the ones that were beyond redemption. So what was one doing around her friend’s neck? “Yes,” she said forcefully. “I’m sure. This needs to be fixed. If Jax thinks he can get away with this shit, he’s wrong.”

“I-- okay,” Remmy said. There was something more volatile about Nell-- Remmy didn’t know everything that had gone done or the entire story, but Luce had said that they brought Bea back, and after knowing how she died and that she died, they knew it couldn’t have been an easy thing. Hesitating just a moment, Remmy nodded. “Okay, let’s do this, then.” There could be no more hesitation. They’d have to do this quick, and corner him quickly, otherwise he would set off the collar’s defense and kill Remmy. Their skin prickled underneath it and they itched at it, the skin there raw and red, in a constant state of open wound, healing and reopening all the time. Keeping them weak, tired, hurt. They were ready to be done with it, with this place. They were ready to move on with their life.

As they approached the entrance, they waved Nell around to the back. “We should probably go in this way,” they said, “in case there’s others up front. “ This was the way they usually headed in, when coming for a fight, anyway. It would look less conspicuous, probably. Hopefully. There weren’t too many people here, either, on a Sunday night. Sundays were usually reserved for the creature on creature fights, not as much fanfare, not as much excitement. It would be quick and quiet and hopefully Jax would just...listen to them. He had to, right? Right. This would all go smoothly. Remmy skirted over to the door that led to the back where they usually checked in with Jax and motioned to Nell. “This is it.”

Nell had always been a person of action, but Bea’s death had driven her even further down that path, no longer as willing to let things get to the point where someone might die. If threats could be dealt with, they needed to be addressed early on before things got out of hand. She wasn’t going to let anything even remotely similar happen to her friend, not when there was an obvious answer. Who the fuck did Jax even think he was, anyway? A glorified referee getting too big for his britches and throwing his weight around with Remmy? And exactly what had Ronald been doing on a peaceful farm? Trying to steal creatures? There were too many questions now surrounding the Ring for her not to have a word with Jax. She simply nodded, agreeing with Remmy before continuing on with purposeful strides, anger boiling in her stomach. When they got to the door, she didn’t hesitate, having no reason to. Without so much as pausing, she reached forward to jerk open the door, entering without so much as a warning to give Jax a piece of her mind. “What the fuck is Remmy doing with a collar around their neck?”

When Nell didn’t hesitate, Remmy felt their heart jump. The door flung open and they could see Jax inside, just around Nell’s figure. He was sitting at this desk, alone. And he didn’t even jump as the door slammed open. “Umm…” Remmy mumbled, glancing around, “Nell?” But Nell’s eyes were set on the man in front of them, lounging in his chair as if he owned the place. And he sorta did, this was his office after all.

Jax smiled as the door swung open. He hadn’t been expecting Penelope to come as well, but a two for one was a good deal. Sitting forward in his chair, he shrugged. “I thought you understood the rules of the Ring, Nell,” he said simply. “If the creature disobeys, they get punished.” The door behind Remmy swung shut quickly and behind it was the red-eyed man, a vampire with little patience, just waiting. Jax gestured to Remmy. “The creature disobeyed,” he stated, then met Nell’s rage-filled glare. “Therefore, it gets punished.”

Nell had absolutely zero care for Remmy’s concern, knowing that it was well-placed, but her need to place this anger that was bubbling inside her was greater than a sense of potential self-preservation at the moment. Besides, she wasn’t scared of Jax. Recently, the Ring had been doing more than one thing she didn’t approve of, and she wanted answers. Both for Remmy, and for Jared’s farm. “Remmy is not a creature,” she spat, her arm jerking painfully towards the zombie. “Remmy wasn’t brought in by catchers, and has done nothing to warrant being treated like the ones I bring in. Remmy is not your fucking pet to punish as you please. I brought Remmy here of their own volition, and they will continue to fight or not fight of their own volition.”

“Oh, but my girl,” Jax said smoothly, coming around the table. He was holding something, fiddling with it in his hands. A bracelet-like object. “They are.” He had noted the tremble in Penelope’s arms, the bandages, the way she moved painfully. When his hand snaked out in a quick flurry, he had her by the wrist quickly. The vampire behind them moved forward in a flash, yanking Remmy back. All he had to do, then, was push one button on a small remote and Remmy was screaming, crumpling to the ground, as electricity poured through their collar. Jax pulled on Nell’s arm, knowing it would hurt, feeling her injured flesh below his grip. With bandages on, it was harder to push his influence onto her, but he could feel it seeping in, slowly, watching her body relaxing. “Calm down, child,” he said, his voice both venom and silk at once, “you’ll hurt yourself.” He moved, then, to secure the bracelet around her wrist. It vibrated and lit up, securing itself to her, digging into her skin, making sure it could not be removed. “That oughta do it.”

From the ground, Remmy looked up. The pain was still searing through their body. “Nell,” they huffed out, “Nell, what’s--” but the man behind them stepped on their head, pressed down. Remmy cried out again, feeling the pressure of his boot against their temple. He only stopped when Jax waved him off. He looked down at Remmy with sharp eyes, always so blue.

“You brought this on yourself.”

Nell had never had reason to think Jax might use his pheromones on her, even if she knew he used them on others in his craft. So she was underprepared, in no way ready for the onslaught of them that quickly overrode her senses. As he drew closer, her body had initially tensed, as if ready for a fight, but that was quickly done away with as he spoke with that silver tongue, exerting the power over her. He was so...entrancing, wasn’t he? It was impossible to take her eyes off him, and she didn’t want to. But then came pain, and a strange bracelet locking onto her as she yelled out. Remmy? Remmy was in pain, too. Her brain was hazy, trying to work through the fog that Jax had put over her, but it was no use. Still, even if she was locked on Jax, she knew Remmy being hurt was that last thing she wanted. “Stop!” she called out, instinctively raising a hand to magic the vampire into submission. He wasn’t Jax, so she felt no inclination against harming him. But as the magic began to flow, more pain. It came from the bracelet, causing her to yell out once more. “Remmy? Remmy-” she looked between Jax’s shoe and her friend, caught in the throes of pheromones and her own brain, trying to battle for dominance.

Jax liked the way the confusion clouded Nell’s eyes. Her friend was right there, crying out in pain, suffering, and all she could do was watch. This was his power. He reveled in it a moment before nodding to the vampire, who yanked Remmy to their feet. “Take ‘em to the cages,” he said, keeping his hand on Nell’s wrist to keep her calm, even as she tried to use her magic, watching it strike pain in her. He really loved these inhibitor rings. They worked for all occasions, even sapping magic. Another smile graced his face. “Now, are you gonna fight and need to be caged, too, or are you gonna be a good little witch and let this go?”

Remmy tried their best to look up at Nell, but tears clouded their vision. They needed to help her, this was all their fault. They had dragged her into this and now-- Jax had been right. Alain had been right. They were all right. Remmy was nothing but a danger and they had yet again put a friend in harm’s way. They slumped with their defeat, head bowed, and let the vampire drag them up, heading towards the door. “Please let her go,” they said, not bothering to look up, “please, Nell, just...please stop fighting.” Tried to look up at her once more, but the pain in their neck, the smell of burnt flesh, forced their head to come up no more than to be able to look at her waist, here bandaged hand hanging limply by her side. The other clasped in Jax’s grip. Remmy bit their lip. “I-I’m sorry,” they muttered, “I’m so sorry.”

The cages. Nell knew those all too well, often making her drop offs there when it came to monsters and whatnot. Perhaps in some world, it was poetic that she would find herself in one. Her utter rage still burned, but it was...far away, as if a blanket had been thrown over it and since she couldn’t see it, she couldn’t access it, couldn’t let it course through her veins to color her words and actions. Not when it came to Jax, at least. But fighting...that was something she’d done her entire life, something she’d never learned how to quit doing, even when it had been Montgomery looming over her, ready to strike a killing blow. She couldn’t fight Jax but...the vampire. There was still him, right? It had hurt last time, using her magic. And her arms weren’t up to par with hand to hand combat. Magic had always been the most effective for situations like this. She raised a hand to bite her thumb until it bled, magic piling up in her once more— she grit her teeth against the excruciating pain, not even realizing yet that it was draining her magic in the same breath. Reflexively, she swiped the blood against her arm. Nothing happened. She looked down, and she realized how stupid she’d been. Her summoning tattoos. They were gone, having peeled off with her skin. Fuck. She tried her best not to look at Jax, to ignore his questions and that shiny glow around him that made her want to please him, to make him happy. Again she yelled, loud and guttural as she reached for the magic she still barely understood, trying to bring the vampire to his knees. She felt like she was on fire as the bracelet sparked to life once more. If she could take one down, maybe they could find a way out of this? There had to be a way. There had to. She wouldn’t get her power taken away from her like it had been stolen with Montgomery. Not again. Not this soon. It worked, bridging the vampire to his knees as pain also erupted in his eyes. But it wasn’t enough. There was still Jax. Still the collar. Still the bracelet. And now her own knees were jelly, the bracelet having taken her magic from her.

Remmy dropped from the vampires arms as he suddenly cried out in pain. Blood dripped from his eyes and he grabbed his head, screaming with his agony. But Remmy didn’t-- couldn’t-- move. Their limbs felt too heavy, their body too much. They looked up as they saw Nell collapse, too, to her knees. She was also bleeding, from her hand, on her arm. Remmy could smell it. “Nell, no,” they said weakly, reaching for her. “Nell, wait--” but it was no use. After a long moment, the vampire stopped screaming, and though his eyes still bled, he reached for them, kicking them, hard, before shoving their body through the door. Remmy coughed, sputtered, pain striking their stomach. “Wait, no, Nell-- wait. Wait! What are you-- where are you taking-- Nell!” they called out, trying to reach for her. But another push of a button, and their vision went black, and they slumped, unconscious for a moment, to the ground.

Jax frowned. “So that’s how it’s gonna be, huh?” He shook his head in disappointment. He had let her exhaust herself, let her use her magic, let her hurt herself. And when she was done, he tugged her back to her feet, no matter the weakness of her knees, and carried her out after Remmy, so she could watch. As the vampire dragged them away and towards the cages, he followed behind with Nell. Not too close, not too far. And when they reached the cages, he turned to the one across from Remmy’s and opened it, guiding Nell inside. “I hope you’ve learned your lesson, Nell,” he said firmly, before finally letting go and shutting the gate, “I really hope you have.”

The bracelet paired with Nell’s outburst of her magic was more than enough to have the world spinning, things making little sense as she felt Jax tug her upwards, even the pain of her arms feeling far away. Remmy...she was vaguely aware of her friend, and the fight that was still bubbling in her stomach despite being barely conscious. She had to get them out of this, they had to get to safety. But all too soon they were reaching the familiar cages beneath the ring, and Jax’s fuzzy words made their way to her before the gate closed behind him. Fuck you, she wanted to say, but her weaknes paired with the pheremones prevented any words from even beginning to fall from her. Powerless. Just as she’d been when Montgomery had been preparing to raise his blade. Not again, not now, not ever. But try as she might, and as stubborn as she was, her eyes drooped, closing as darkness took hold of her, passing out with a final thought. Exactly how were they going to get out of this?

#chatzy #lessons learned #ch:remmy #wickedswriting #non con tw #it be pheromones

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salvejoon · 5 years

Text

Them Hurting You(Verbally) Hyung Line

Kim Namjoon

“I don’t really get what your problem is, Y/N.”

You scoffed, “You stood me up.”

“I was busy working on the new-”

“You didn’t even send me a text, Namjoon! I didn’t hear a single peep from you! You’ve known about it for weeks and you still conveniently forgot about it. About me!” You cut him off, your whole body shaking with anger and frustration, “You knew it was important to me!”

“It wasn’t important to me!” He suddenly yelled, catching you off guard. You stared at him with wide-eyes, your heart rapidly speeding up.

“The event... Or me?” You asked slowly and he didn’t answer, your heart breaking at his silence. Tears gathered in your eyes and you slowly nodded, biting your bottom lip, “I-I see.” You mumbled. You grabbed your coat and left the dorm, not wanting to be near him. You slammed the door behind you as you headed outside in the pouring rain.

Namjoon stood there, in complete silence as he replayed his words in his mind. Not important! Not important! Not important! His words rang louder and louder until he couldn’t take it anymore and hit the wall.

“Fuck!” He bellowed as he opened the door and bolted down the hallway, intent on finding you. He exited the building, not caring that it was pouring down. All he could think about was finding you. He roamed endlessly until he saw you sitting by a bus stop.

“Y/N!” He called out but you didn’t respond and he ran over to you. As he approached you he saw how soaked you were, how tears were steadily rolling down your cheeks, your make-up smudged and ruined beyond recognition.

You flinched the instant his hand grabbed yours, having been so lost in your own misery that you hadn’t heard him nor seen him.

“Don’t touch me.” You pulled your hand away.

“Y/N...”

“Just... Don’t. I’m not important, remember?”

Namjoon knelt down in front of you, forcefully grabbing both your hands in his larger ones, “You are important. I’m so sorry for making you believe otherwise, baby.” He started and you looked away as it hurt too much to look into his eyes, “I know I fucked up royally and that I can never undo what I did or what I said but I need you. I need you to forgive me. I don’t care if you yell or scream or kick me in the balls, just as long as you forgive me.”

That caused you to chuckle slightly.

“Please, baby, I love you.”

You slowly turned your head and looked at him, “I put up with a whole lotta shit by being with you, y’know. So the few times I actually need you to be there, you aren’t.”

“Y/N...” Namjoon knew you were right. You did have to put up with a whole heap of crap, both from him and his life but you asked for nothing in return. You only wanted his love.

You surprised him by leaning down, putting your forehead against his, “I forgive you though.” You smiled a little at him, “Because there’s no Y/N without Kim Namjoon.”

“And there’s no Kim Namjoon without Y/N.”

Kim Seokjin

You and Jin rarely fought but Jin had been in a weird mood laately, ignoring you, your texts and calls and you’d had enough. You knew he was stressed with the upcoming comeback but that didn’t mean he should forget you.

“Y/N, I don’t have the time for you right now.” He said as you stood in the doorway of the dorm.

“Why not?” You asked, “I haven’t seen you in days. You don’t respond to my texts or calls.”

“I really don’t have time for this.” He sighed, “We’re about to go to practice and-”

“I’m your fucking girlfriend, Jin! You don’t ignore the people you love for days on end and-”

“Well, perhaps I don’t love you.”

“W-What?” You croaked, taking a step back as if he’d hit you, “You don’t mean that.”

“What if I do?” He pushed.

Overwhelmed with anger and heartache, you could only whisper, “Then we’re done.” You whirled around and walked swiftly to the elevator, unable to hold your tears back and they began rolling down your cheeks. You pushed the button and waited for the elevator and as soon as you entered it, the doors closed, you let out a heartbreaking sob.

Jin stood frozen in the doorway, staring at the spot where’d you been standing, intense regret forming in the pit of his stomach. Had he just told the woman he intended to marry some day that he didn’t love her? Had he just spouted such words, breaking your heart in the process?

He had and he regretted it as he sprinted to the elevator, pressing the button several times, desperately until he cursed loudly and headed for the stairs. He almost tripped as he ran down the stairs, praying that he would reach you before you left.

You were crying uncontrollably and you slid down the back wall of the elevator, your whole body feeling like it was about to give up on you. You were so enveloped in your heartbreak that you didn’t notice the elevator ping, the doors opening, revealing an out-of-breath Jin looking desperately around for you.

He quickly spotted you and ran into the elevator, the doors closing behind him.

“Y/N.” He said your name so softly, his heart breaking at the sight of you, your quiet sobs stabbing his chest, “I’m so sorry.” He desperately grasped at your arms, hands, anything he could get in contact with as he tried to get you to look at him, “I didn’t mean it. I regret saying it. I do love you. So much. Please, Y/N. Look at me.” A tear slowly rolled down his cheek as you slowly raised your head, peeking up at him through your lashes, “You’re the most important thing to me and I need you. Please, forgive me.”

“Do you have any idea how much you hurt me, Jin? Ignoring me for days and then suddenly saying you don’t love me?” You murmured, “I thought I was dying.”

Jin leaned in to touch your forehead with his and you saw a few tears escaping his eyes, “I know and I’m so sorry. Seeing you like this breaks my heart and the pain is even worse knowing it was my words and actions.”

You sniffled and grasped his hands gently, “Promise me you’ll never say such a thing again, Jin.”

“I’ll never ever say such a thing again, Y/N.”

Min Yoongi

“Yoongi, baby, please remember to take care of yourself. You’ve been cooped up in here for three days.” You said, putting down a tray of food on his desk, next to him, “Please eat something at least.”

“I really don’t need you trying to baby me right now.” He said coolly, his eyes not moving from the screen.

You scowled, “I’m not babying you, Yoongi. I just want you to take care of yourself.” You reached out for the back of his chair and turned him around to face you, “Please. Eat something.”

He slapped your hand away quite harshly, taking you by surprise, “Take your babying shit and get the fuck out.”

You moved the hand he’d slapped away to your chest, clutching your blouse as your heart constricted in your chest painfully, “I’m just trying to-”

“Well, I don’t need it, Y/N!” He snapped, glaring at you.

“Fine.” You spat, tears gathering in your eyes, “Have it your way, Yoongi. I was just trying to take care of you because you so often forget yourself. I’m sorry if I disturbed you.” You backed away and your heart broke as he turned his attention back to the screen. Shaking your head, you left his studio, bumping into Jin on the way, mumbling a weak apology as you headed down the hallway.

Yoongi sighed harshly as he tried to resume his work but he kept glancing on the tray you’d left behind. There was a note next to the plate of food and he reached for it, opening it slowly.

Little Meow Meow,

I’ve made some food for you to eat. I know you’re working hard but please don’t forget yourself in the process.

I’m so proud of you and I love you to the stars and back.

Yours forever,

Y/N

“Damn it!” He yelled, hurling up from his chair, rushing to the door, harshly opening it. Jin noticed him and the rapper approached him, “Where’d she go?” he asked desperately.

Jin pointed down the hallway, “What did you say to her? She was crying.”

Yoongi shook his head and bolted down the hallway, relieved when he saw you walking slowly towards the stairs. He sped up and crashed into you, causing you topple over, falling onto the floor.

“What the fuck!” You yelled, craning your neck to look at Yoongi.

“Y/N.” He breathed harshly, scooting away from you, “Stop.”

“If you hadn’t noticed, you pretty much stopped me.” You huffed, pushing off the floor, “Not only is he shoving my love back in my face, now he’s trying to kill me too.” You mumbled angrily as you got to your feet.

Yoongi jumped to his feet, instantly grabbing your hand, “Don’t leave.”

“You pretty much told me fuck off, asshole. So that’s what I’m doing.” You spat.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I don’t want you to leave.”

“Fuck you, Yoongi. Fuck you, fuck your stupid track, fuck - Oomf!” You were cut off as his laps crashed onto yours, catching you by surprise. He held onto you as the kiss ended and you scowled.

“Seriously, what is with you?” You huffed.

“Babe, don’t leave. I know I’m a dickhead sometimes but I love you and that you want to take care of me.” He said softly and you sighed deeply.

“The shit you put me through...”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know... I forgive you this one time but if it happens again and you shove my love and care back in my face, I’ll shove something up your ass.”

Jung Hoseok

You really didn’t want to intrude but when Jimin had reached out to you earlier that day, asking if you would like to come watch them practice, you’d said yes. You wanted to see your boyfriend whom you hadn’t really had the chance to hang out with lately with the upcoming tour and a new album in the making but you also wanted to hang out with the others. Hoseok had been happy seeing you but he’d seemed... Off.

You watched in silence as the boys practiced the new choreography in the dance studio. Silent, you watched them practice for hours and hours and when the others began to gather their things, heading back to the dorm, Hoseok still kept dancing.

You could see he was frustrated. Not only with himself but also the others. He was rarely in a bad mood but the pressure was starting to affect him, which led to him snapping at the members when they made a mistake although he was quick to apologize.

You studied him in the reflection of the mirrors, exhaustion apparent on his features. Bags were under his eyes, his skin looked less vibrant and his eyes were dull.

Sighing softly, you pushed off from the floor and walked over to him as he stopped dancing, mumbling to himself, “Hobi, why don’t we go home? You look tired.”

“I’m not tired.” He answered coolly, not looking at you.

“You really don’t think I can see how exhausted you are?” You scoffed, folding your arms.

“As I said, I’m not tired.”

You sighed again, “Babe. Please, let’s just go home. I can make you some food and we can go straight to bed afterwards.” You smiled a little as his eyes met yours briefly.

“I don’t think you understand, Y/N.”

“Oh, I understand. But that doesn’t mean I like seeing my boyfriend working himself to the brink of collapse.”

“Then don’t come around. Seriously, do you have any idea of the pressure I’m under right now? Not only do I have to get this new routine right, I also have to make sure the other members don’t screw it up.” His eyes turned hard and your smile faltered, “The last thing I need is you being clingy, acting like a mother hen -”

“Acting like a mother hen? Really? I’m your girlfriend, Hoseok and it’s perfectly normal to worry about the person that I love but if you really hadn’t wanted me here, you should have said so.” You grit out.

“I’m saying it now. You have done nothing other than sit in the corner all day, doing absolutely nothing and that only added to my stress.”

“How did me being here add to your stress?”

“Because you just remind of another obligation I have!” He snapped, whirling around to fully face you and you flinched at his volume.

“I-I’m an... Obligation?” The word tasted horrible as you said it, “So that’s how you see it? Us? An obligation?” You asked, feeling a wave of sadness wash over you, making your shoulder slump, “You know what? I’m not dealing with this. If that’s how you feel then I’ll just leave. That’s one less obligation for you to deal with. I wish you luck with your tour.” You whirled around, not being able to cry in front of him.

Hoseok flinched as you slammed the door behind you. “Fuck...” He cursed softly as he started dancing.

The instant you got home, you let your tears flow freely. You slid down the door, wiping your tears away with your sleeves but they just kept coming. You sniffled loudly, leaning your head back against the door.

Suddenly there was a knock on your door, “Y/N?” You heard Hoseok on the other side, “Let me in.”

You didn’t answer but sniffled again.

“Please. I can hear you.”

You contemplated on whether you should tell him to fuck off or actually open the door and hear whatever he had to say.

Hoseok almost let out a sob as he saw the state of you as you opened the door, the streaks of tears on your cheeks, the absolute pain etched into your expression, “I’m sorry.” He croaked, his voice breaking, his own eyes tearing up as the guilt wrecked through him, “I’m so sorry.”

“Are you? Or did you just feel obligated to apologize?”

He flinched at your words, “I...” He broke down and leaned against the door frame, tears now running down his face, “Y/N... I don’t know why I said that. You are not an obligation to me. I just... I shouldn’t have let my frustration out on you. It was wrong of me and I only ended up hurting you.”

“You did.”

“I know. But please, forgive me. I can’t do this without you. The moment you left the studio, I felt empty.”

You couldn’t take it anymore and closed the distance between the two of you, hugging him tightly as he placed his head on your shoulder, letting all his regret and frustration out, repeating ‘I love you so much’ over and over.

A/N: This was hard to write. Like, really. I had to draw inspiration from personal life and cheesy dramas I’ve watched.

Maknae Line will be up sometimes tomorrow.

#bts #bts members #bts reaction #bts angst #bts rm #bts jin #bts suga #bts jhope

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mageicalwishes · 4 years

Text

Crying In My Prom Dress - Chapter 6

Read on AO3: here

Read the previous chapter (on Tumblr): here

Summary: The Leaver’s Ball marks the end of the school year. The end of their time at Watford. Baz has a confession to make before it’s too late. But, will he ever pluck up the courage to tell Simon how he feels?

Inspired by the song “Prom Dress” by Mxmtoon.

Chapter: 6/7

Words: 3,711

Baz

I’m sitting on my bed, my body slumped over, and my head resting in my hands. My stomach is churning horrendously, violent butterflies battering against my insides. I have to tell him - And, it has to be now. It’s my last chance. If I don’t do it now, I know I’ll regret it for the rest of my miserable life. Bunce thinks I have a chance. And, after tonight, I’m starting to believe that maybe (just maybe), she is right. I don’t deserve it, of course - But, if there is even a glimmer of hope that Snow may feel the same way, I have to just take a leap of faith and confess. Even if he rejects me completely, even if he drives a bloody sword through my chest - I have to know if he feels the same. Yes or No. Leaving Watford with a maybe would be torturous. I need a definite answer. But, my mind is racing - A million thoughts swirling around hurriedly within my skull. How am I supposed to tell him? What do I say? What do I do? What if I’ve completely misjudged the situation? What if Bunce was wrong? Is this too soon after Wellbelove? What will I do if he turns me down? What will I do if he doesn't? What if it just makes him angry? What if I make him uncomfortable? What if he just laughs at me? Could I handle that? I suppose, if worst comes to worst, I could always just use an amnesia spell on him. Of course, he’d remember eventually - But, hopefully I’d be far, far away from him by that point. Much to my dismay, I doubt we’ll keep in contact after tomorrow - After the way I’ve treated him, he’s probably counting down the hours till he’s finally free of me.

That’s undoubtedly my biggest regret about my time at Watford - The way I treated Snow. Deciding that being an utter prat to him was the best way to deal with my feelings towards him, was, undoubtedly, a dreadful idea. I mean it worked to an extent - I highly doubt he has even the slightest suspicion of my true feelings towards him. I don’t think that pushing somebody down the stairs really screams “I’m hopelessly in love with you”. But, it hurt me - And, it hurt him too. Sometimes, when we’d fight, I’d take it too far - I’d see a look of genuine hurt flash across his face, and it would kill me inside. Looking at him like that - It felt as though my heart was being shred into a thousand, unmendable pieces. Sometimes, I felt as though I deserved it - The pain. It was my penance. Penance for all that I am - Penance for all I still feel. But he didn’t deserve it - I never thought he deserved it. Of course, I’ve toned it down dramatically since Fifth Year - But I still haven’t been exactly pleasant to him. Always winding him up. Always beating him down. Always insulting him. Every cruel word tasted like bitter ash in my mouth, every cell in my body desperately pleading with me to take them all back. But, I never did. I couldn't. I didn’t mean a word of it, it was all just a facade. But of course, Snow doesn’t know that - He has every reason to despise me. And, yet … Tonight, it didn’t feel like hatred. Far from it, actually. It felt like, maybe, in spite of it all we could be something more. Something good. Something true. No more pretending. No more fighting. We could finally be happy.

Snow crashes into our dresser with a dramatic clatter, and I snap my head up, looking over at him. He’s hopping on the spot, trying to shove his left foot into his trainer. He looks like a complete, and utter disaster - But, it's painfully endearing. He's changed into a tight-fitting pair of jeans, and a loose salmon-pink T-Shirt - And, his damp curls are sat atop his head in their usual, unkempt tangle. He is positively divine.

“Are you ready to go?” he asks, finally slipping his foot into his shoe.

“Not exactly," I say, hesitantly.

“Oh. What else do you need to do? … Your shirt looks fine - I promise. So did the first one. You really don’t need to change again, Baz. Come on, we’ll be late otherwise”

“No. I - Um, it’s not that,” I murmur. “I just - It’s just - I have to tell you something before we leave. It’s important. Please, just wait.” Merlin and Morgana, I’m petrified. Pathetically, my voice has already started trembling - And, Snow has clearly noticed. He’s frowning at me, a deep furrow between his brows. This is categorically mortifying. But, I have to do it. It's now or never.

“Oh. Okay. Sure. Uh - What is it?” he says, his voice laced with confusion.

“I-” Crowley. I have no idea what to say. He’s staring right at me. I drop my head down, my eyes planting themselves firmly on the floor - I just can’t look at him right now. “It’s just that I - I have to tell you because we’re leaving tomorrow. So, I - I just have to tell you. But it has to be now.”

“Okay, Baz. You can tell me - I’m listening. Promise,” he coos, reassuringly.

I can’t do this. I can’t find the words. But, I’ve started now - I can’t just pretend it was nothing important. I’ve got to do it. I have to tell him. “Okay,” I breathe. “Simon, I - I. It’s about you.” I pause, unsure of what to say. I’ve imagined this a million times in my head, a million different ways to tell him how I feel - Yet, now, when I need them the most … All my words seem to have escaped me. My hands are shaking violently against my thighs. I grip my knees to try and quell their vibrations, but it hardly makes a difference.

“Um - Okay? What about me?” he asks, uncertainly.

Christ. What is wrong with me? I’m definitely freaking him out. I just - I just can’t do this. I look up, meeting his gaze once more - And then, I’m lost. A thick, impenetrable knot forms in my throat, suffocating my words. He’s rubbing his forearm anxiously, his face still twisted into a frown. I feel my eyes well up, and dart my head back down towards the floor. I'm not going to cry - I'm not really upset, I'm just ... Overwhelmed. I'm anxious. I'm embarrassed. But, most of all, I'm frustrated - Frustrated with myself. Why am I such a coward? Why can't I just say it? Of course, Snow notices. He squats down onto the floor in front of me - Reaching forwards and pressing his hand against mine, giving it a comforting squeeze.

“Baz,” he croons. “Baz. Look at me, please.” I don’t. It doesn’t matter though, because he reaches out with his other hand and bumps the bottom of my chin upwards. He doesn’t do it forcefully, I could've easily kept my head down if I wanted to - But, I'm a sucker for Snow, so I oblige. He smiles at me weakly, then. “Please, tell me what’s wrong. Whatever it is you have to say about me, you don’t need to be upset about it. I won’t be mad or anything? I just want to know what’s wrong. I don’t understand," he says, sounding as frantic as I feel.

Frustrated with myself, I reach over to my bedside table and pick up my wand. Snow leans back on his ankles, pulling his hands away, and tilting his head in confusion. I have to do this. It’s the only way. I’m not brave enough - I just can’t do this of my own accord. I close my eyes and rest the tip of the wand against the inside of my wrist, coughing out a quick “Best kept secret” spell. It works instantly - My mind clouding over suddenly, and the knot in my throat melting away. There is no turning back now. A million words, lost to me moments ago, come bubbling back up my throat.

“Simon, I’m in love with you,” I rush, the words spilling out of me now. I'm completely powerless to stop them - And, it's terrifying. “I have been for a very, very long time now. I’ve tried to make it go away - Honestly, I have. I tried everything I could think of, but it never worked. All those horrible things I’ve said and done over the years, I didn’t mean any of them. I admire you. I always have. If you could look into my mind, you’d see that I think of you like you hung the bloody moon. I adore everything about you - You enrapture me. And, tonight - Well, tonight has been the best night of my life. Spending it with you, it’s the best send-off I could have ever asked for. It was you that I wanted to go with in the first place, anyway. And, I've wanted to tell you all of this for a while now, but I could never pluck up the courage. Last week, I thought I finally might ... But, I chickened out again. I just - The truth is that, I love you so much Simon Snow … More than I thought possible. I love you so much, sometimes ... I thought it would kill me. I can’t bear the thought that, after tomorrow, we may never see each-other again. I’d give anything to spend more time with you, even if we just stayed as what we are right now. I just - I just had to tell you. You have to know how I really feel.”

With that, the magic that was coursing through my veins, cools and fizzles out - Freeing my mind and mouth. Released from the spell, the reality of what I've just done dawns on me - Christ, I said it. I actually said it. After all these years - I’ve finally done it. I snap my eyes open, desperate to see Snow's reaction. He’s staring at me, wide-eyed, his jaw hanging open foolishly. God … What have I done? I’ve fucked up massively, I know it. How could I be so foolish? I knew I shouldn’t have said anything. I knew it would end like this. If he didn’t hate me already, he certainly will now. Crowley, I’m an idiot.

Simon

What? What on earth is happening, right now? That is definitely not what I thought he was going to say. I mean, I'm not sure what exactly I thought he would say, to be honest - But I never would have guessed that. Baz said … Baz said he loves me. He used that secret spell, too … So, he couldn’t have been lying. And, I mean, he seemed so afraid to tell me - He must've meant it. Baz loves me. Baz has been in love with me for ages. I’m pretty sure my heart has stopped. I don’t know what to think. I’m not angry. And, I mean … I’m not put off by the idea. If anything, I think I feel … Glad? Fuck. What is happening? I’m staring at him, I know. I should probably say something, but - What am I supposed to say to that? Baz loves me. He loves me. I’m so overwhelmed. After what feels like an eternity of sitting there, silently staring at him, I manage to talk (Just). “I - You. You - You what?” I bumble.

Baz

Crowley, I've ruined everything. I should've just enjoyed my last few hours with him, rather than dropping a bomb like that on him. But no. I had to go and tell him. I don't understand how I ever allowed myself to become so deluded that I genuinely believed that confessing to him was a good idea - Because, going by his reaction, it is likely the worst idea I've ever had. I wish the ground would swallow me up - I don't think I can handle this. I can't handle him turning me down. I'm not strong enough. It will destroy me. Yet, there is no escape now. I swallow, readying myself for his rejection. But, to my surprise, it never comes. Instead, he picks himself up off of the floor, and sits himself down beside me on the bed.

“Since when? he asks, quietly.

“Snow, it’s fine .. You don’t have to. We can just pretend I never said anything. I shouldn't have said anything, I'm sorry.”

He juts his chin forwards, stubbornly. “No. I - I want to know," he insists.

"Okay," I say, unsure. “I - I’m not certain, exactly. I figured it out for sure in Fifth Year, but - I think I’ve felt it pretty much always. Uh, I mean in First Year, I felt … something. I just didn’t fully understand what it was at first - I thought it was some adolescent infatuation. I was certain that it would die down eventually … But, it didn’t. I just kept falling, deeper and deeper. In Fifth Year, I - I just accepted the truth. I couldn't lie to myself, anymore,” I murmur, my cheeks burning with embarrassment.

He wrings his hands together in his lap, squinting his eyes at me like he was trying to figure something out. “Is - Is that why you’ve been a bit … You know, recently?”

I sigh, Simon never has been the best with verbalisation. “No, Snow. I don’t know. Just - Just, use your words.”

“You know … Softer,” he says, hesitating on the last word.

Mortifying. Absolutely mortifying. The next time I feel myself getting too cocky, I’ll remind myself of this moment - That’ll be sure to knock me down several thousand pegs. “Yes, I suppose. It’s more than that though. I’ve always wanted to be ... 'softer' with you - I just couldn’t risk it. But, with the end of the year approaching, I figured it was safe enough to just drop the facade. I’ve denied myself the pleasure of being pleasant to you all these years, I figured I may as well indulge myself a little. With so little time left in the year, I figured nobody (including you) would figure the truth out in time - And then, well, then we’d never see each-other again. Secret Safe.”

“Oh,” he says, nodding his head slightly.

————————————————————————————

We sit in silence for what feels like hours, although logically, I know it’s only been a couple of minutes. He’s thinking - His face scrunched up in concentration, and his hands tugging at his curls mercilessly. I’m a nervous wreck - My stomach churning uncomfortably, my arms and legs still shaking anxiously. The silence is unbearable, my confession hanging heavily in the air between us. Waiting for him to speak is excruciating - I'd rather he just get it over with and stab me. He probably wants to.

“I - Just forget I said anything, please. I’m sorry. I don’t know why I told you. I should’ve just kept it to myself. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable. I mean - I mean, I know you don’t … Uh, reciprocate. And, it’s fine,” I ramble. “I mean, you can just pretend I didn’t say anything. I know you don’t -”

“I never said I don’t,” he interjects. What? He? What? Surely, he realises what that implies? This cannot be happening? Surely not. I think my heart is going to give in, it's thundering within my chest worryingly fast. I look over at him, desperately scanning every inch of his face. He’s blushing ferociously, his tawny skin flushed a deep pink - It's adorable.

“I- You?,” I stumble, my voice wavering.

He shrugs. The bloody nightmare just shrugs at me. Unbelievable. I stare at him, unsure how to respond. He’s refusing to look at me, picking at his nails aggressively. He's clearly anxious. But, is he trying to say what I think he is? Does he reciprocate, or what? I don't want to get ahead of myself, but surely a 'No' is easy enough to say. Surely, he wouldn't be this anxious reject me. I wait with bated breath for him to elaborate, cautious of pushing him too far.

“I think so,” he mumbles. “I- I don’t know since when, though. I just - I think I do. I mean, I’m pretty sure I do. I’m not the best at … Understanding what I feel. But, you know, I think I do, too.” Aleister Crowley, I’m living a charmed life. It’s hardly the way I imagined Snow telling me he feels the same way when I was younger - There is no long, heartfelt speech (Although, knowing Snow as I do, I'm not sure why I ever imagined I'd get such eloquence from him). But, I don't care in the slightest ... It's perfect. It’s infinitely better than anything I could’ve imagined, because it was real. Because it was him. It wasn't just some deluded, hormone-fuelled fantasy - It was my actual, real life. My heart swells, drowning in the warmth of his confession. It's pure euphoria. I’m gawping at him absurdly. He must think that I look completely ridiculous, but I seem to have lost all control of myself. Simon Snow likes me. Simon Snow thinks he might love me. Given that revelation, I can hardly be expected to carry on functioning as normal. I mean, he’s not definite, but that hardly matters. A possibly is immeasurably better than the 'No' I was expecting. And, then, it gets even better ...

“Can - Can I kiss you?,” he asks, scrunching his mouth to the side awkwardly.

“Simon, you don’t have to. Just because I said - I mean you don’t have to. Only if you want to.”

“I want to,” he says, determinedly, reaching out and pressing a hand to the top of my thigh. His touch is feather-light, but it sets me on fire. I turn my body to face him fully, our eyes meeting once more. His pupils are blown wide, barely a slither of blue remaining. A shy half-smile has spread across his face, and his cheeks are impossibly red now. “Only if you want to,” he whispers, barely audible against the thrum of our pulses in my ear.

It feels slightly awkward - Having to admit to him what I want. A part of me wishes he'd just lean forwards and do it, there is really no need to ask. Of course I want to - I have for years. But, he wants to kiss me ... Having to embarrass myself a little more to get it is hardly going to put me off. “I want to,” I breathe. “I’ve always wanted to.”

He exhales loudly, flashing me a shy smile, shifting towards me on the bed. He reaches up, pressing a palm to the side of my cheek, his fingertips weaving themselves into my hair. He pulls my head towards him, gently - And then, he finally kisses me, softly pressing his lips against mine. They’re slightly chapped, but they’re so warm against mine - It’s intoxicating. My mind fuzzes over, my thoughts entirely consumed by him. He’s sliding his lips against mine expertly, jutting his chin out in a way that makes me melt. He moves his free hand to grip my waist, the other tugging on my hair lightly. I follow his lead, threading both of my hands into the curls at the nape of his neck. They’re so soft - Softer than I’d imagined. Given that he insists on using that god-awful school-issued 'shampoo', I half-expected it to feel like straw. How wrong I was. I tug gently - A small, appreciative hum rising from the back of his throat in response. It drives me positively wild. Instinctively, I reach down, sliding my hands around his waist. Gently, I tug his body towards me, moving him so that he is straddling my lap. I pull my mouth away from his, momentarily. “Is this - Is this okay? I don’t mind if you want to stop,” I breathe.

He giggles quietly, shaking his head. “Yes,” he asserts, shifting in my lap, leaning forward to rest his forehead against mine. He bumps our noses together in the process, nuzzling his against mine shyly. “It’s good. So, so good. Definitely don’t stop.”

A wide smile breaks across my face, my cheeks aching with the force of it. He mirrors me, beaming up at me, his dimple popping proudly. A wicked glint flashes across his eyes - And then, suddenly, he’s surging forwards. He tackles me, pushing me down so that I'm lying flat against the bed. He shifts himself up my body, pressing his hands flat against the mattress either side of my head, holding himself above me properly, now. I wrap a hand around his wrist, squeezing it tightly, desperately wanting to hold onto him.

“I love you,” I say, rubbing a finger along the inside of his wrist, soothingly. I don’t need the spell to say it this time - It’s all me. I can finally just say it. He finally knows. Gone, is the weight I’ve been carrying for the last eight years - I’m finally free. I don’t have to hide it away anymore, I can love him out loud. He’s finally mine. Mine to hold. Mine to kiss. Mine to love. And, I’m elated. Of course, I know he won’t say it back (it’s much too soon for that) … But, I don’t care. He’s here, with me - Gazing down at me, a rogue curl flopping down over his eye, and a handsome grin adorning his face. And I know, I wouldn’t give this up for anything. Because Simon Snow is looking at me like I’m something, like I’m everything, and nothing could mean more.

#carry on #wayward son #snowbaz #snowbaz fic #simon snow #tyrannus basilton grimm pitch

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